#ignore a lot of the coloring mistakes. im so tired.

[jjjacobine]

bday gift for a friend

[etsuven]

rating: angst to fluff word count: 4.8k (i got carried away and all of a sudden it was 4k words long what happened my previous max was like 2.5k-) cw: death, slight mentions of blood includes: god! reader, reincarnation au, college au, mild cursing, reader is implied to be shorter than zhongli, the two of you are a bit awkward at first but honestly it's cute <3, childe has a few appearances, mentions of childe and his real name (it's used a lot because i don't see 'childe' being used a lot in a modern au), lowkey wingman childe, fischl and barbara make an appearance, reader is described as pretty. summary: amidst the screams of gods under the night sky, you make a wish...

note: the summary was originally supposed to be a gradient but everything kept going wrong with it, like having the colors merge with the words before it, and i got annoyed and deleted it so if you notice some spelling mistakes i LITERALLY cannot edit them out or else everything will fall apart as im writing this part it's 3:19 AM on 10/31. but anyways i started writing at like, 6:30 AM on 10/30 and when i properly finished it it was around... 2:00 AM? i got a bit carried away, i had to make this good! anyways enjoy-

screams rang through the night air, but they were only background noise to the throbbing that seemed to echo throughout your body. your vision was blurring more and more by the second, and you could feel your thoughts fading away.

you attempted to inhale deeply, but the pain in your chest kept you from doing so. 'where was zhongli?' you thought, looking around. you tried to keep your mind away from the battlefield around you, but it was hard, especially considering that it was probably the only thing you could see for miles.

a sharp intake of breath caught your attention, and you quickly looked to your left, still alert even though you could slowly feel the life leaving you. you could see the figure of your lover crawling towards you, and you managed to reach out a bloody hand towards him.

he took your hand in his, kissing the back of it before pulling you towards him. weakly wrapping your arms around him, you inhaled his scent. the smell of his expensive cologne lingered on him, but there was also the familiar smell of the battlefield on his clothes.

"i'm so tired, 'li..." you whispered. your lover took in a shaky breath, and you tried not to think about the faint beating of his heart in your ear. he was clearly having trouble, perhaps this battle was too much for him. too much for the both of you.

zhongli pressed his lips against your head. "i know, darling." he adjusted your body in his arms, resting his back against one of the only trees that were still standing. "you did your best, i'm proud of you."

you let out a little hum, your eyes closing for a split second until you forced them open. the two of you sat in silence, and you found your gaze trailing to the stars above. "hey, do you think we'll fall in love again?"

your lover took no time to nod, his eyes also going towards to the sky. "of course we will-" his sentence was cut off by a cough, and you looked at him worriedly. you hadn't had the time to look at his face since he found you, meaning that you hadn't yet gotten a glimpse of all of the cuts on his face.

his gaze fell down to your face, and he found himself smiling. even now, you were still gorgeous. "i'd fall in love with you a million times over if i had the chance to..." your hand reached towards his jaw, and you used all of your energy to press your lips against his cheek.

a long exhale left your lips. it was getting harder to stay awake now. "let's do that then. let's fall in love a million times over, just like you said..." zhongli chucked, trying his best to ignore how quiet your voice was getting.

"okay. i love you... so much." he looked down at your form, watching as you responded faintly before your eyes closed. he glanced at the sky, pleading silently that your shared wish would come true. the stars twinkled above the two of you, and it was almost as if they were giving him permission to join them.

one seemed to shine brighter than the others. perhaps it was you?

his body was aching. maybe it was time for him to go, too... he took one last look at your body, using more strength than usual to lift his hand up and brush his fingers through your hair. his eyes slid shut, eyebrows furrowing at the effort he took to do such a simple task.

the feeling of the tree against his back faded away, and his breathing began to slow. the only thing on his mind was you- you and your smile, your laugh, everything about you. and unbeknownst to him, the sky seemed to gain another brightly shining star, right next to the first one- just as he let out his final breath...

-

you took in a deep breath. college was hard. opening the door to the library, you walked in, going to your preferred section. you placed a few insignificant things down at a table, secretly hoping that no one would come by and take them. your more expensive things were in your backpack, so you weren't too worried. but you had chosen a spot close to the section of books you needed for your essay, so your worried were quickly quelled.

once everything was situated, you went to the shelves, quickly scanning through until you found the section you needed. you seem to have needed a specific book for the essay, as an upperclassman had recommended it to you. after a minute or two of looking, you still couldn't seem to find it. perhaps it was on the other side? you were on the right track alphabetically...

you turned to go to the other side, but you were quickly distracted by the absolute hunk of a man standing on the other end.

he was very tall, and he had a certain air to him that practically screamed royalty. he had very long chocolate brown hair that was put in a ponytail, and the color went quiet well with the tan of his slightly oversized sweater.

the circle rimmed glasses sat nicely on his nose, complementing the sharpness of his jawline and the content on his face as he looked through the books. all in all, he was really cute.

"he's single, y'know~" a voice whispered near you, and you had to cover your mouth in order to keep a yelp from escaping into the quiet of the library. an equally as tall man walked by you, though this one had bright ginger hair. he took a quick glance at you, a teasing smile on his face as he walked over to the cute guy.

'well shit.' you felt your face heat up in embarrassment. 'you've been caught.' you turned on your heels, trying to ignore the burning feeling in your cheeks. you were trying to find a book, not stare at a random guy in the library! who did you think you were?

you sat down at your table, silently groaning in exasperation. you hadn't even gotten the book yet! taking a quick glance around the area around you, you noticed the two men walking out of the section you were just in.

taking your chance, you got up, speed walking over to the area and finding the book you so desperately needed. as you walked back to your table, you locked gazes with the ginger- almost orange haired man, trying to ignore the knowing look in his blue eyes. the brown haired man started to turn around, and you quickly looked away, heading back to your seat.

"what are you looking at, ajax?" zhongli looked behind him in confusion. the only thing really behind him was a fellow student walking by with a book clutched in their arms. his gaze followed them for a few seconds, and he found it quite hard to tear his eyes away.

"oh, i dunno... what are you looking at?" zhongli finally turned around, noticing the familiar teasing look in his childhood friends' eyes. with a roll of his own, he went back to the book he had just picked up. "nothing, i was just looking where you were."

ajax- or childe as known by others, chuckled quietly, thinking back to the person he had caught staring at his childhood friend. you looked like a deer in headlights, enamored by the sight of the young man. and judging by how zhongli's eyes had followed you as you walked by, he seemed to feel the same way.

zhongli hadn't dated anyone his whole entire life, always claiming that he wanted to wait for the perfect person. even though he only seemed to care about his studies to the average person, he was quite sweet, and he even had a romantic side to him.

don't tell anyone, but ajax had even caught his friend reading a few romantic books in his free time.

"you were staring at that person walking by, weren't you?" he asked, the teasing tone still in his voice. zhongli groaned, trying to ignore his friend as he went back to his book. maybe he was staring at you, but admitting it to ajax would be like signing his own death certificate.

-

you spotted the library man a few times in the next few days. walking across campus, in the dining hall with the rich kids (of course he would be friends with those such as ningguang, diluc, and ayato.), and of course, in the library. you even swore that you had seen him in your dreams, even way before you had seen him for the first time.

for as long as you could remember, you had been having these dreams.

it was weird, honestly, and sometimes you couldn't tell if you recognized the person materialized by your brain. you often dreamt of someone similar to the mystery library man, someone who also had an aura of power and knowledge that you could sense from a mile away.

the dreams were often blurry, and half of the time you couldn't even see what you were looking at. visions of midday hangouts, nights in the city during a noticeably orange and blue toned festival, and stories being told by that man raced through your mind. you had always found them quite interesting, even before you knew what the strange man was talking about.

they weren't always nice dreams, though.

you had bad ones too, nightmares of a bloody battlefield, fighting for your life and eventually losing... you were in the embrace of another, presumably the same person that you seemed to dream of since you were a child.

"perhaps you've seen him around campus before that day, and your brain just put him in your head?" the soft voice of your underclassman- barbara, spoke up. she twirled an ash blonde pigtail around her fingers, looking up at you from her paper. "they say that the people in your dreams are people you've seen in your daily life."

you sighed, resting your face in your hands. "i swear i've never seen him before- i would have remembered someone as good looking as him!" you locked eyes with fischl, another underclassman. she was studying theatre, and you honestly couldn't think of a better major for her.

"well, maybe he's your soulmate! all of those dreams seem to be too vivid, and..." the sound of her voice went in one ear and out the other as you started to think. soulmates sounded nice, sure, but you were certain they weren't real. of course you had seen couples who seemed to be made for each other, but maybe they had just gotten lucky.

or perhaps you were just bitter that you never seemed to be able to find a lover.

"anyways, guys, i have to go back to the library." you spoke, and the girls let out noises of disappointment. fischl even stopped her speech for a bit. barbara placed her pencil down, a confused look on her face.

"can't you look online for what you need?" a knowing look was on her face, and you found yourself looking away. clearly she was starting to figure out why you liked going to the library so much. fischl had the same look on her face, and you could already see them gossiping about you when you left. "no, i uh- it's not online... i'll see you later though, bye!' and with a quick wave, you were off.

you entered the library a few minutes later, already subconsciously starting to look for the mystery man. strangely enough, even though you had seen him around more times than you could count, you hadn't even spoken to him once. more strangely, the mystery man wasn't there.

you let out a disappointed sigh, heading to your usual table. going through the now memorized routine of placing your stuff down, you walked to the section you needed your book from. this time the book seemed to be way out of reach. you stood on your tiptoes, trying your best to reach the item.

"ah, allow me to get that for you." a deep voice reached your ears, and you found yourself looking over in surprise. the man you had been seeing everywhere for days was right in front of you! normally you would be scared if some random guy invaded your personal space, but the mystery man seemed to have a certain sense of... familiarity around him.

you looked up at the young man, trying to hide how you were checking him out. he was definitely prettier up close. "is this the book you wanted?" his voice was also deeper than you expected. you nodded quickly, shyness suddenly creeping up on you.

you let out a small thanks, about to walk away before his voice stopped you. he had told you to wait. you looked at him in confusion, feeling your heart speed up. it was so weird, you had never properly met him before, yet it felt like you'd known him forever. perhaps it was just the similar figure in your dreams messing with your head.

you watched as he turned around, and you quickly noticed that the tips of his ears were slightly red. maybe he was as nervous as you? you followed his line of sight, noticing the same ginger man from a few days ago looking at the mystery man with a quite dumb smile and a thumbs up.

the tall man looked back at you, and- wow, his eyes were so pretty. they were an amber color, almost gold. it was a color you had never seen on anyone before.

"so... what do you need the book for?" he asked. you could see him tense up a bit, almost as if he didn't want to say what he said. you looked over at your spot, pointing over in the direction of your stuff. "i have a paper due in a few days, i was told that this book was one that could help me with research."

the two of you chatted about your majors, and you found out that he was a history major studying business on the side. clearly he was very smart, but the workload must have been insane. he claimed he was fine with it though, even stating that it was quite easy considering that he had a fondness for those types of things.

he offered to help you with your paper, and even though you initially declined- you didn't want to burden him- he insisted, leaving you to lead him to your table. unbeknownst to you, there was a man on the sidelines cheering the two of you on.

-

"goodness, it's getting quite late..." a quick glance at your phone alerted you to the time. the sun was starting to set, and golden light was streaming through the windows in the library. clearly you had gotten carried away, but you had also finished your paper! due to you looking at your phone, you just managed to miss the flash of disappointment on the mystery man's face, now known as 'zhongli.'

"my, you're right." he stood up, brushing invisible dust off his pristine clothes. he picked up a few of your things, handing them to you politely as you gathered everything together. you felt your heart sinking as you placed your things in your bag, starting your walk to the entrance of the library with the mystery man.

what if you never had the courage to speak to him again? he was wonderful, and you didn't know if you could take not being able to speak to him again. he seemed quite shy as well, perhaps even awkward at times, especially in the beginning of your conversation. that only meant a lower chance of ever speaking to him again.

suddenly, an idea popped up in your head as you made it outside. it would be perfectly fine if he rejected you, after all- you fully believed that you'd never see him again after this. and so...

"um... can i give you my number?" you blurted out, a slight shakiness in your voice. you watched zhongli's eyes widen in surprise, and if you looked close enough, you could even see a faint coloration of his cheeks. was he embarrassed? did you do something wrong? was there-

"yes- yes, of course!" he seemed flustered as he took out his phone, unlocking it and handing it to you with shaky hands. you took the item out of his hand (the new model? wasn't this super expensive?), inserting your number and name into the phone before reading over it twice and handing it out to him.

zhongli pressed the corner of the screen to save the number, pressing the power button soon after and placing the device into his pocket. adjusting your backpack and jacket, you failed to notice his eyes lingering on your figure. the light from the sunset fell onto you perfectly, encasing you in a sort of heavenly glow that had his heart skipping a few beats. he had never felt this way before, so why...

"i live a bit away from here, so i'll get going now before the sun sets." he began to rock nervously on the balls of his feet, hoping that you didn't hear the slight stutter in his voice. you nodded quickly, and the zipper of your jacket made a cute jingle as it collided with the metal part of the garment.

"okay! um, stay safe!" you gave him a wave, speed walking away towards... wherever you needed to go. zhongli sighed, a tightness in his chest as he watched you leave. suddenly, a hand slapped onto his shoulder, causing him to almost yelp in surprise.

ajax was standing next to him, a wide smile on his face as he started leading his friend towards their shared apartment. "so..." he dragged on, looking at his friend expectantly. zhongli shrugged, trying his best to fight down the blush that was threatening to form on his cheeks.

"they uh... gave me their number." zhongli watched out of the corner of his eyes as his friends jaw dropped, sighing deeply at his friends' dramatics. ajax patted his back, looking up at the now darkening sky above their college. "you'd better actually do something with that."

-

you entered the hallway to your dorm, sighing deeply at how tired you suddenly were. you thought back to you giving zhongli your number, your face heating up at how quickly you left. you couldn't even say a proper goodbye? how rude-

a ding interrupted your thoughts, and it took you a few seconds to realize it was coming from your phone. you took it out of your pocket, quickly looking at the screen only to have your jaw drop in shock.

(___)-___-____ would you like to hang out sometime? -zhongli.

-

"you're smitten, dude." zhongli looked at ajax in disbelief, wondering why he would assume such an absurd thing. the two of you had just properly met, and even though he had been seeing you around campus for a while now, it was way too soon to consider him being in love.

he leaned his back against the couch, looking at the ceiling above him. the two of them were in their shared apartment, one that ajax mainly paid for considering that he had more money than he could imagine. since they were upperclassman, it was naturally harder for them to find dorms to stay in. not that they'd want to do that, anyways.

"there's no way. we just met each other, that's not enough time for anything to form." zhongli looked forward again, grabbing at the teacup resting on the coffee table in front of him. ajax sat on the other side of the couch, only to lean back and rest his feet on the table much to his roommates dismay.

zhongli sighed softly, swirling his tea around in his cup. it was weird, the way he felt for you. he'd never felt this way about anyone before and honestly... he was scared. ajax looked at his friend with concern, wondering if he really was okay.

"it was a joke, i promise..." and it really was. he just wanted to rile the young man up a bit, as well as get the pretty person who was unabashedly staring at his friend a chance with him. he was about to speak again when zhongli began to speak before him.

"have you ever met someone... only to feel like you've known them forever?" he continued to stare into his teacup, almost lost in the sight of himself in the liquid. ajax began to ponder the question. he would say that about zhongli, but the man didn't even like him that much when they were younger.

he took a long sip at his tea, inhaling the aroma after he was done. "that's how i feel. it's weird but... also nice?" zhongli watched as ajax hummed along, as if pondering his statement. what he didn't know was that his words had only cemented what was originally a 'joke' in his friends' head.

'he was definitely smitten.'

-

you and zhongli began to hang out more over the following weeks, getting used to each other's personalities and habits. you studied together, ate lunch together, and you finally introduced him to your friends! at this point, you could call him a friend of your own. but lately you seemed to have started thinking of him in a more than friends kind of way.

even though you were already feeling these things way before you had properly met him- nervousness around him, your heart skipping a bit whenever he did or said certain things, that sense of familiarity that never seemed to fade away- you were sure that they would go away eventually.

but they never did. in fact, they only got worse.

zhongli began to feel the same way, and ajax used that as an opportunity to both encourage him and tease him. encouraging as he's the one who helps him gather the courage to ask you to hang out more, and teasing when ajax makes fun of how flustered he gets around you.

while zhongli tries his best to ignore his friends' recent bout of teasing, he takes note of the meteor shower that was said to happen later in the week. although he didn't want to dedicate time to something that probably wasn't even guaranteed to happen, he understood that it was still an opportunity to hang out with you.

shooting you a quick text about the event, he shut off his phone, acting nonchalant as he waited for you to answer. the phone dinged right away, the screen lighting up to your message.

(y/n) <3 of course i'll come! should i bring some snacks?

he smiled at the text, answering back before cutting off the phone once more. trying to avoid the look he knew ajax was giving him, he spoke up. "i'll be gone late friday night." he could see the ginger trying to hold in a laugh.

"going to go hang out with your lover?" zhongli stood up, phone in hand as he walked to his room. he inhaled deeply, trying to quell the pounding of his heart in his chest. "they're not my lover, ajax!"

"not yet!"

-

friday night was finally here. you had just taken a quick shower to freshen up, and you were now trying to find an outfit to wear for your little outing. date? you didn't even know what to call it at this point. your roommate helped you a little bit, picking out a few items that they had felt fit the overall vibe.

the outfit was cute, and it was even paired with a sweater incase it got cold. you left your dorm a few minutes after, heading to the meeting spot you and zhongli had agreed on around two days prior.

like usual, he was there earlier than the agreed time, waiting for you with a blanket in hand. you called out to him, waving excitedly as you watched him smile at the sight of you. "hey, 'li!" even though you had already seen him earlier in the day with a few friends, it felt different when it was just the two of you.

"shall we go? from what i heard, it should be starting soon." you nodded at his words, letting him lead you to where you were going to sit for the next few hours. there were a few people out tonight, probably because a meteor shower definitely wasn't an event to miss.

zhongli placed the blanket down once the two of you had found a suitable spot with barely anyone nearby, and you quickly spread the snacks around before sitting down. the young man wasn't really a snacking type, but it seemed that you had brought along a few things he liked this time. had you done it on purpose? no, no- it was probably a coincidence.

though, instead of opening the snacks, you seemed to be occupied with fiddling at the hem of your sweater. zhongli looked forward to look at you, concerned by your sudden change in attitude. "is everything okay, (y/n)?" he asked, his voice quiet. you made eye contact with him, and he noticed how you seemed so similar to the person he had met all those weeks ago.

you took in a deep breath, and he watched as your shoulders rose and fell with the action. "sorry if this is sudden, but... what if i told you i liked you?" zhongli felt his heart both stop and skip a beat.

you... liked him?

you continued speaking, almost as if you were trying to block off any potential interruption from him. you spoke of the moment you saw him, and how you felt that fateful day (even speaking of 'the ginger guy who told you that zhongli was single.')

he weakly called out your name, half wanting to tell you his own feelings and half wanting to hear all of the reasons why you liked him. you didn't seem to hear him though. clearly that fischl girl you had introduced him to had rubbed off on you. after a few more tries, he realized that he had to quickly had to think of a way to interrupt you.

you continued to babble on, barely noticing the warm hand on your cheek or zhongli's steadily nearing face until it was too late. his lips connected with yours, and for a split second, your mind went blank. the only thing you could think about were his lips on yours and how it felt like a long, long overdue kiss. it was almost as if you had been waiting for this kiss for longer than you had been alive...

he pulled away a few seconds later, forehead resting against yours as he tried to regulate his breathing. his forehead was warm, and you could even see his flushed cheeks through the darkness of the night. "i like you too..." he whispered, uncharacteristically shy and quiet. you were so used to hearing him talk about what he loved, so to see him like this?...

a sound of excitement from a nearby woman caught your attention, and the two of you looked up to see that the meteor shower had finally started. you stared at the sky in awe, watching the little streaks of light fall down.

suddenly, you felt something brush against your hand, causing you to jump in surprise. you looked down, noticing how zhongli's fingers seemed to be creeping closer and closer to yours. feeling a bit bold, you grabbed at his hand, only to smile shyly when you felt him squeeze at yours.

looking up at the stars in the sky, you noticed quickly that there were two particular ones sitting next to each other that seemed to shine brighter than the rest. you pointed up at them, wanting your new boyfriend to look as well. "that's weird, those two stars are super bright compared to the rest.

zhongli let out a hum, trying to come up with a reason as to why. "perhaps it's us?" he said, glancing at you with a sort of mischievous look in his eyes. he brought your hand up to his lips, kissing it in a way that felt all too familiar.

you shoved at his shoulder with your free hand, complaining lightly . it wasn't enough to hurt him, but it was enough to make him chuckle a bit. squeezing at his hand a bit more, you looked towards the sky and at those two brightly stars. maybe zhongli was right…

maybe they were the two of you…

[yesimwriting]

Would you write a Kaz Brekker request where the reader is a bookworm and a crow and basically Kaz asks the reader to read to him as his way of apologizing after a argument that was his fault?

 it ​​a/n i did something kinda similar in a 'promise of rain' blurb,, but this concept is so cute to me:)) love it sm i moved it up my request cue lol

also IM IN COLLEGE NOW!! WHAT?? AND IVE BEEN TO A PARTY! AND IM JOINING A SORORITY AND I DID DRAMA AUDITIONS AND AHH !! SO DIFFERENT! I MISS MY MOM AND SISTER AND DOG AND EVEN MY DAD BUT IM HAPPY HERE!! 

also im a little worried this might not portray kaz superrrrr accurately bc it's been awhile so just let me know,, feedback leads to improvement:)) also kinda set this up for a part 2 bc...well youll see 

--

They've always said a lot of things about him, and I've always heard them. But I've never quite believed them. Sure, I get why the dark things that have flourished in the poisoned soil that is Ketterdam consider Kaz Brekker the darkest thing of all. I understand the nickname 'Dirtyhands' for the gloved criminal who has fooled each crime boss at least once. I understand each terrible thing they've said about him.

But I've never agreed with them. I've never even considered agreeing with them. Until today.

The thought that maybe everything people say about him is correct in a simple context struck me worse than the silence after our argument. It made me feel like both a fool and hypocrite. Kaz and I have had our fair share of spats over the relatively short time we've known each other, but never like this. Never so badly he stormed out of the room before I could. I squeeze the book in my lap even harder, desperate to focus on the words on the pages.

You didn't hurt him. He walked away because he decided you weren't worth the cost of his expensive time. I repeat those thoughts in my mind over and over again, letting them bitter me further. It's a lot easier to be mad than hurt. A lot easier to fuel your pain than try to understand your mistakes. Besides, tiredness is already dredging around in my chest and if I don't calm down a little I won't be able to fall asleep.

I had escalated the fight more than I should have. Knowing Kaz is like performing in a tightrope act. One must always be aware of where they're going. Watching what's in front of them without ever thinking too much about what's beneath or behind them. Today though, when I needed my balance most I chose to fall. I chose to dive, and apparently there was no net.

"Oh, you're doing that thing."

I roll my eyes at Jesper's voice as I fight down a yawn. I wipe my face with the back of my palm before turning. The burning behind my eyes never resulted in full tears, but I feel better after doing so. "What thing?"

"That terribly noble thing where you find it in yourself to take full blame for every single conflict you and boss man fall into." The slight humor in his voice is enough for me to roll my eyes again. "Between you and me, I'm sure the reason he's so angry now is because you didn't do that for once."

I press my lips together as my chin angles itself upwards slightly. "I never do that." He raises an eyebrow. The slight sympathy that colors the look is more offensive than his accusation. "If I pick and choose my battles, it's for good reason."

"Clearly."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He shrugs once before further entering my room. I say nothing when he sits at the foot of my bed. "Oh, you know," Jesper stretches back casually, resting his back against the wall and extending his legs, "You and Kaz--Kaz and you."

Has he been drinking? Perhaps he's not here because of my unusual absence from downstairs after my fight with Kaz but because he's already too tipsy to think right. "What?"

At my confused look he grins, flashing all of his teeth with an arrogance that outshines the whiteness of them. He taps the still open book in my lap. "Let me put it in terms you'll understand." Jesper sits up a little further, amusement clear in his features. "You two make a shameful Elizabeth and Darcy--"

"Oh, shut up," I groan, glaring at him, "This isn't Pride and Prejudice. And Kaz and I," Jesper's smugness returns when I can't quite think of what I want to say, "We're barely friends--we're barely anything, let alone what you're implying."

Jesper pulls his legs up and shoves me gently. "Dearest, y/n," he ignores my glare, "You should know better than anyone that 'barely friends, barely anything' with Kaz is more than it is with anyone else?"

"That doesn't mea--"

"You two say goodnight to each other." Once. Kaz and I said good night to each other in front of Jesper once. How dare he assume it happens regularly? He's right, but that doesn't mean I'm okay with it. "You play cards with him. Not for money, not for skill--"

"It's for practice." The look Jesper gives me is enough to tell me that my defense didn't land.

Damn him for ever finding Kaz and I on one of those strange nights. One of those nights in which he lurks at the stairwell...the one that divides my room and his attic. One of those nights in which it feels like he's a phantom and I'm the only one that can really see him. A night in which we both silently find each other.

I couldn't quite believe it the first time it happened. I'm not exactly a Crow--I don't feel enough a connection to the Dregs to join them without some kind of guarantee--but I was needed for some obscure job. but I was needed for some obscure job. The Crows needed an insider who could blend into high society, and I needed a place to stay away from my father.

It worked. I worked. And with each passing day I found myself enjoying the Crows more and more. That's why I stayed. That's why I started checking the stairwell practically every night, a set of playing cards in my hand.

The first time had been awkward. I couldn't sleep and my room felt too quiet, but the rambunctious club felt too loud and a little unsafe considering the hour. So I settled for the only space in between. When Kaz found me sitting on the steps and playing a solitary card game I had been so stunned by embarrassment I just offered to deal him in. I had been more shocked when he silently accepted my offer.

"Practice?" Jesper repeats. "You were laughing, I heard you."

"That was one time--how do you know we didn't just happen to play cards together the one time you saw it?"

"Because you laughed about a play you considered 'predictable'."

Sighing, I sit up a little straighter. "I'm not having this conversation. Occasionally saying 'goodnight' to someone who lives in the same space I live in and sometimes playing cards with said person because we both happen to be up at a certain time doesn't mean anything."

"And the way he looked at the contact that was flirting with you?"

Oh...this conversation again. "For the last time, the contact wasn't flirting with me. We had to dance to blend in and when he leaned towards me to whisper in my ear...it was to tell me the intel Kaz just had to have."

"And when he tucked that strand of hair behind your ear?"

"He just wanted to sell our cove--"

"Y/n, he kissed your cheek and I'm fairly certain he would have kissed you if Kaz and I hadn't made it to the corridor at that second."

Why is everyone so obsessed with what would have never happened? The contact had been attractive, tall with fair eyes and hair. But it's not like I feel anything for him, nor would I have been so foolish during a job. A fact that Kaz refuses to believe. I'm tired of this argument...I'm just tired. This job required me to start getting ready early in the morning and lasted long into the night.

"I wouldn't have kissed him and even if I had, the fact that Kaz is so mad about feels...sexist." A stupid argument, considering that Kaz couldn't care less if the person he's working with is female, male, or anything in between because the only thing he cares about is profit. "It's a stupid thing to be mad about, but you hit on anything with a pulse at any time and--"

"I resent that--"

"For the first two weeks I was here I thought you might've been a prostitute."

I can feel him holding in a laugh. "Did you at least think I was a good prostitute?" When I glare again, he finally actually laughs. "Not the point--got it."

"Then what is the point? You're bored and obsessed with gossip so now you're shaking me for information you don't need."

"The point is you're oblivious." Rude...I move my leg in a weak attempt to push him off my bed. Jesper catches my ankle easily, ignoring my attempt at a fight. "You thought the contact was only doing his job and you don't know the real reason that Kaz blew up at you for the first time the way he blows up at everyone."

"Okay, well since you know everything, tell me why he's mad."

He lets out a sigh like he can't believe I even needed to ask that. "It's not the best look that the first time you let him pick a fight with you happens to be about some guy."

...Maybe he is drunk? "Don't be so cryptic. I don't like you enough to put up with that."

Jesper half-sighs again before pushing himself off my bed. "I'm going to pretend I think you're smart enough to piece things together from that."

"Asshole," I mumble instinctually as he walks towards my door. "Are you not telling me because I tried to push you off the bed?"

He turns when he reaches my door in order to lean against my door frame. "It's not not because of that." I should throw my book at his head. "In all seriousness, think about it. If you don't you'll either kill each other or kill me."

Ugh...he's so confusing. This time, I let him go. He leaves he door open, which is beyond annoying. I stand up to close it, promising myself I will focus on my book the second it's in my hands again. As I walk back towards my bed, my eyes land on the deck of cards on my nightstand.

Does it send a signal I don't want to send if I don't go the stairwell tonight? Do I want to send a signal? I don't know...actually, the only thing I know is that I don't want to think about this a second longer. I don't ease as I read, but my eyelids become heavier with each word they cross. I feel the weight of them as my focus slips, farther and farther away until I can no longer focus. When my eyes fall shut I can't bring myself to think or force them open.

--

I notice my surprised before I register that I've just woken up. Falling asleep feels so far and yet the crick in my neck confirms the obvious. Rubbing the eyes with the back of my hand, I push my book from my lap and sit up. The only indication of how much time has passed is how much my bedside candle has melted.

How long have I been asleep? How did I manage to fall asleep? I thought I was too mad at Kaz to manage anything but pouting in my room. I hadn't even decided if I wanted to talk to him.

I stand even though I haven't decided anything. I should at least change if I want to go to bed. But is leaving this alone for even longer a bad idea? I think Jesper thought so...though my conversation with him is far from clear. It's not the best look that the first time you let him pick a fight with you happens to be about some guy. I'm going to pretend I think you're smart enough to piece things together from that. What does he want me to do with that?

Maybe he was partially intoxicated and felt the need to play the role of a good friend. Or maybe this is his idea of a joke.

Whatever--regardless of Jesper, I have a choice to make. A tiny part of me hopes it's insignificant, but I know Kaz enough to know that nothing is insignificant to him. He holds onto things the way he holds onto his kruge. Perhaps I'll seek out Inej, she seems to be the best at rationalizing. Though she might be asleep by now, or on a job or...I don't even know.

How late is it? Is it late enough to be one of the few hours Kaz claims to reserve for sleep? Maybe my bad luck is still around and he's already in bed for once. Does that mean his anger will extend to tomorrow?

I shouldn't care. It's not like I'm in the wrong. Did I escalate things? Maybe a little...but I won't apologize for defending myself. Even though that makes everything a little easier. I feel stuck, like in some kind of place of half sleep. A single knock at my door is enough to make me want to jump. I rub my eyes a little more firmly in hopes of waking up more before someone sees me.

I approach the door without worry. Maybe it's not as late as I assumed. Or maybe it's really early? I open the door while still fighting against my slight disorientation. I'm so focused on acting normal, I almost don’t register the person standing at my door. 

I don’t know who I expected, or what--maybe Jesper, much more tipsy than he was before, slumped against the doorframe, only knocking because he’s too tired to push the door open. Maybe even Inej, on her way here to deliver some kind of job or notice of dismissal. But it’s nothing I could expect. It’s...Kaz. 

The Dirtyhands stands at my door, expression as hard as ever yet something behind his eyes that burns the sleep away from me. “Uh--hi.” I bite my tongue to avoid cringing at that very awkward beginning. “Are you here to kick me out yourself?” The only response I get is the slightest shift of his gaze off of my face. “No? Well then I think I’m going to bed. It’s late.” 

My tone and words are clear. Get out of my doorway, I’m in no mood to go back to arguing.  When he still doesn’t say anything, I’m emboldened by my nerves. I push the door between us without breaking eye contact. 

Before the wood can meet the doorframe, he moves his cane, wedging it between us. “Y/n.” I don’t understand the way he says my name, but I’m certain he’s never said it like that. “I...” When he’s not prompted by the uncomfortableness of silence, I raise an eyebrow, my grip on the door tightening. “What I said shouldn’t have been said.” Wait--is he admitting fault? I’m so thrown I almost melt entirely. “Not to you.” 

The addition leaves him so lowly a part of me wonders if I’ve imagined it. I’m so thrown by it I don’t even think to reply until a long second has passed. “You seemed to believe the opposite a few hours ago.” 

His lips press together for a moment. “You didn’t ask me to play cards tonight.” He took that as intentional? At least that got me some kind of apology? I keep my mouth shut, greed making me want more information. I guess he must sense my silent tugging because he head inclines slightly. “Don’t push.” 

I fight down a grin. “Push what?” His only response to stiffen further. “I’m going to tell you something as a peace offering.” That seems to intrigue him in some way. I can’t tell if it’s a good kind of interested, but I note the slight raise of his eyebrows and his intentional silence. “I didn’t chose not to ask you to play cards.” He gives me no indication of anything, which is fair...considering my vagueness. “I was mad, obviously, and in the middle of deciding on a course of action...and then I fell asleep.” 

A long pause of silence. “You fell asleep?” 

I’m not sure if his incredulous tone should offend me or not. If I wanted to lie, I’d like to think he knows me well enough to know that I’d have thought of a better excuse than that. Or at least a less embarrassing one. “Yes, it’s not that difficult to believe. Today had been long and all I wanted to do was read, but then Jesper came in to say the oddest things and then leave me to...” 

Oh--oh. I guess there’s a reason people say to ‘sleep on’ something. Because now, actively remembering Jesper’s words for the first time since I fell asleep...I understand what Jesper was implying in the oddest way possible. He meant that Kaz and I...that perhaps there is a Kaz and I in a context that’s more than just grammatical. Wow. I really had to realize this with Kaz right in front of me. 

My face feels warmer than it did before, an irrational bout of anxiety forcing me to consider that me might be able to read impossible, embarrassing thoughts from my expression alone. 

“What did Jesper say?” I’m too lost in my own spiral of confusion and panic and some feeling I can’t recognize to register how Kaz asks his question. There’s an edge to it, an odd one, but that could easily just be Kaz. 

This is most definitely the last conversation we need to be having. I’m still mad at him for his earlier dramatics. So I just shake my head, feigning an exhaustion I could lose myself in. “Nothing and everything all at once.” I resist the urge to rub my eyes again. “I’m pretty sure he was drinking, and I wasn’t really listening. I was just trying to read.” 

Kaz’s expression hardens briefly as he takes in my words, and then he exhales, nodding once with the breath. “What were you reading?” 

My lips part instinctually, ready to spew off details about the latest novel that’s captured my attention. But before I can let myself take off, the reality of the situation strikes me directly in the chest. This is not Nina, or Inej, or even Jesper after what he considers a ‘good night’. This is Kaz Brekker, the man believed to not have a soul. I’ve spoken to him before about casual things, though most of the nights in which we end up playing cards or just sitting near each other are spent in silence. But he’s never prompted me before. Not in the one topic he knows is guaranteed to turn me into an overenthusiastic, gushing fountain of poor summaries and character analysis. 

I guess this is his peace offering. This shouldn’t warm the way it does. He was still unbelievably dramatic and treated me like I’m some kind of unreliable fool. “It’s late, and you know how I can be. I’d hate to keep you for nothing more than a poor summary and honestly, an embarrassing rant about plot or characters, because there’s just nothing as frustrating as when two people so clearly care about each other and both are too stubborn and oblivious to acknowledge it.” 

Kaz’s eyebrows draw together just enough for me to be able to make out a shift of expression in the poor light. Perhaps his lingering irritation is preparing to rear its ugly head. The corner of his mouth seems to threaten to tilt upwards as Kaz angles his head to the side slightly. “I can’t imagine that position.” 

No kidding. I bite my tongue to keep the sarcastic comment and awkward laugh that would sure follow it away. “Who can? That’s like half the point of reading.” 

How can interaction feel so over and just at its beginning all at once? I press my lips together to avoid filling the silence with things I’d no doubt instantly regret. It’s easy to be mad at Kaz in the moment. Too easy. But to stay mad at him when his temper has passed and he returns with some kind of begrudging and admittedly awkward and uncertain truce is another task entirely. 

“I’ve never understood your attachment to written words.” 

“It’s not about understanding, it’s about everything else.” 

“And you say I’m cryptic.” Is he...kinda almost joking? I straighten my spine, too tired to fight and too wounded to forgive. “There’s understanding in everything, nothing can survive on sentiment alone.” 

“If you read the way I did, you’d understand.” 

His lips press together as his expression remains unwavering in its hardness. “Read to me.” 

...Interacting with Kaz in any way often leaves me feeling like I’m wandering through unknown territory. But this, this is undeniably different. So different I can’t even think of a way to react. I watch his expression as cautiously as possible. He’s purely reserved, no distinction from the look he wears during business propositions. Except there’s a tightness I can’t quite understand.

Maybe it’s because I don’t want to fight anymore. Maybe it’s because exhaustion is leaving me partially delirious. Or maybe it’s the weird feeling in my chest that I can’t quite place. That I don’t want to place. “Okay.” I shift carefully. “If for no other reason then to prove you wrong.” 

Never did I think I’d end up in the position of sitting in my bed, book in hand, with Kaz Brekker sitting next to me. But here we are. I’m so tired, I almost let out a nervous laugh when he first walked in. So brooding and tall, gripping the head of his head cane as he sits at the foot of my bed, on my pastel quilt. 

I’m glad for the excuse to keep my gaze away from him and on the words in front of me. I read out loud, feeling more and more comfortable with each page I finish. But as my inhibitions slip away, so dos my hold on consciousness. My eyelids seem to grow heavier with each word that I read. 

“You’re falling asleep.” 

I straighten my spine on instinct. “Am not.” I’m not sure why I feel the need to deny something so simple. 

“You’re impossible.” 

From him, that statement is laugh worthy. “I’m impossible? Do you not remember earlier today?” 

From the way his jaw locks, I realize that he’s in no mood to be light about this topic. I don’t understand why. It’s not like I’m the one that wronged him. “I remember your lack of focus.” 

Keeping my hands at my side to avoid rubbing my eyes, I frown. “If you want to have this argument again, fine. Jesper is more ‘distracted’ than me half the time and you’re much more lenient on him. It’s not like I was flirting with someone or gambling or doing anything but having a two second conversation. One that I needed to have to get information that you wanted.” 

The last time we fought, I had more energy to restrain myself. This could be atomic. I hold my breath, waiting for Kaz’s retaliation. He exhales, eyes not meeting mine. “Arguing with you when you’re present is exhausting enough. It’s not worth it when you’re half asleep.” 

This angers me further. I hate that he’s right. “I’m not half asleep.” He leaves it at that. I glare even harder at him, slumping further into my bed. “But for the sake of argument, I’ll drop it. Something you’re incapable of doing.” 

At that, his eyes meet mine. I try to hold his gaze, but the harder I think about not seeming tired the more exhaustion slips in. A yawn escapes me before he looks away. Great. “I know when to lie in the grass in wait.” 

Rolling my eyes, I shift back slightly. He’s incapable of being less dramatic than this. Still, I can’t imagine the effort it’s taking on his part to not start an argument. Maybe this is why Jesper spent so long implying that there may be a Kaz and I in any capacity beyond a vague kind of friendship. “I’ll admit you’re tactful.”

“Resourceful people recognize that trait in other people.” 

Blinking twice, I lower my book slightly. Am I truly exhausted, or did he just compliment me in a way? “Careful, I may start to think you find me tolerable.” 

“Let’s not exaggerate.” Okay, now I know I’m exhausted because I think he might have just attempted a joke. Rolling my eyes, I decide not to acknowledge this lightness in fear that I’ll scare it away. “Y/n?” 

I press my lips together, worried about the destruction of our peace. “Yes?” 

“What did Jesper say to you? Earlier?” I pause, slightly unsure why we’re moving backwards. 

We’re in a decent place now, and I’d hate to ruin it. I’m too half asleep to lie eloquently. And it’s not like he’s an easily convinced man. “Oh, he said it so cryptically it took me longer than it should have to understand. And it didn’t help that it was something so...well, you might find it funny. As funny as you find anything, anyways.” Wow...I’ve spent such a long time talking. Rubbing the back of my eyes, I avoid his gaze. Exhaustion and awkwardness mix in my stomach oddly. “It seemed like he was trying to imply that you and I...me and you...” Why is this a difficult thing to say? It’s not like I was implying it and Jesper’s known for his oddness. “I think Jesper was implying that there was a you and I, or at least that there could be.” I’m too lost in a haze of almost sleep to watch his reaction. I let my head rest against my headboard even further. “Isn’t that odd?” 

He’s quiet for a long second, and then he finally speaks again. “Odd, even for Jesper.” The response doesn’t satiate me...what’s that about? I exhale, deciding that feeling is tomorrow’s problem. When I blink, I decide to let my eyes stay closed. Just for a moment. The sound of something shifting is what makes my eyes squint open. Kaz is standing, his expression unreadable as he straightens. “Goodnight, y/n.” 

At that, I sit up slightly, ignoring the exhaustion behind my eyes. “I haven’t finished the chapter.” 

“You’ve convinced me of enough.” A concession? How exhausted do I seem? My lips press together as I think of my next argument. Before I can get it out, Kaz leans forward. He grabs the quilt at the end of my bed and tosses it onto my legs casually. “Goodnight, y/n.” The meaning of his repetition is clear. His word is final. 

I find enough energy to manage a glare, but I pull the quilt over my legs anyways. “Goodnight, Kaz.”

[nothorses]

im white so i shall not say anything on the subject of race, but disabled men (which i am) exist. do i really have to hear people say men never experience oppression ever ever ever when disability can happen to literally anyone and everyone regardless of any other factor whatsoever. im glad to see the racism element of things being talked about but would love to see the ableism talked about too. sorry if this comes off a little aggressive i dont mean to be im just used to being erased and i get so so tired of it

I mean you're right- there are a lot of axes of oppression being ignored when people argue that men- as whole- never experience oppression. Disability is a huge, huge aspect of that, because yeah! Anyone can be disabled, and everyone who reaches old age likely will be disabled. Those things don't disappear when you're a man- and in fact, it tends to be society's perception of you as a man that disappears if you are disabled.

I do think that the issue of racism comes up so often in these conversations largely because:

A) A lot of the people actually speaking up about these intersections are people of color, and a lot of the language we have to discuss intersections of oppression come from people of color & the work they have done for their communities (very often black activists, specifically).

I can personally attest that the first examples of the intersection between manhood and other forms of oppression that I talked about on this blog, as a white person, were historical and modern examples of white women weaponizing White Woman Fragility against black men; something the black community has been discussing for decades prior to this specific conversation.

B) The argument being made against addressing men's experiences with oppression is often that the people speaking on those experiences are white, or that the ideas themselves are "white ideas".

For example: I have been regularly platformed over transmascs of color speaking to the exact same issues that I am, both by people who agree with me, and by people who don't. I have witnessed just about every single transmasc of color who has been acknowledged be stripped of their race and identity and reduced to "white-aligned", or even just "white", for the sake of argument.

I have seen people argue that "the transmasc community has a problem with racism" citing white transmascs being racist to people outside of our own community, completely ignoring the transmascs of color speaking to their own experiences of racism within our actual community- implying not only that transmascs of color matter less than other people of color do, but that being transmasc is something people of color don't do. That transmascs of color simply do not exist to be listened to in the first place.

---

Obviously, there are also specific issues with the erasure of disabled men and disabled transmascs in these same conversations; I have regularly seen posts about the intersection of disability with these issues go largely ignored, gaining only a fraction of the notes that other posts do. Oftentimes disability just doesn't come up at all, when it absolutely should! It's frustrating and unfair, and you're right.

You're not saying that racism is any less important.

I know that. I want everyone else who sees this ask to know that. Do not mistake OP's point for something it isn't; it's not "why are they talking so much about race", it's "seeing these discussions makes me wish we could have even more discussions". (Do Not Harass This Person, they are here in good faith and have been for a while.)

I just bring this all up because I think it's somewhat unfair to compare the two; racism comes up not because people care more and are doing more, but because it's often a specific, named issue within the conversation- and often to the detriment of people of color involved.

I would just avoid bringing those discussions of racism into this complaint at all, is what I'm saying. It's apples & oranges. Your frustration is valid, but it's maybe not connected to the thing you're connecting it to, and we should probably be having this conversation separately.

[equable8oucanier]

Dear white people, but im serious this time

So I wanted to actually write a good post about this instead of a joke.

I don’t know how to stress that making a black character and having them say a slur or imply they do is racist, not only is it racist it’s straight up making jokes out of us and making a minstrel show of it.

I can’t go and make an asian oc and have them say slurs and or have them act the asian stereotype, or imply they say their personal reclaimed slurs for themselves whilst me being a non asian creator of said character.

There’s an amount of common sense that doesn’t need to be a lot to be applied, there’s a difference between ignorance and just straight up being racist.

YOU MIGHT NOT THINK YOU’RE RACIST, but you are there was a part of you that thought that was okay, and that you had some level of privilege and black access that made you assume that you did.

Time and time again we let you slide by making these mistakes and it’s disappoint when you blatantly spit on your plates and smile at us.

If you do it enough times those front teeth in that smile won’t be there. The teeth won’t be punched nor yanked by us but by you by looking like a damn fucking fool.

I’m sick and tired of this, and so is ever fucking black person on this god damn website, don’t make black ocs or any OC’s of color if you aren’t gonna act with some sense.

Also fuck you.

[redhawtriot]

Caught in The Act (Bakugou x Reader x Todoroki)

Tip Jar ☕- Not expected but always appreciated💞

Thanks so much to all of you who have followed this story! I remember that I started this series this month to celebrate my first 100 followers, but now I am up to 1000 of y’all? The fuck?

You guys are so supportive! I couldn’t ask for a better group of people to share my art with! Again, thank you so much!

HnM💕

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

Finale:

She did not just call you crazy. And a bitch.

Fae’s eyes wildly flashed between you and her sister, “C-crazy bitch? I—"

“FIRST OF ALL, who the HELL do you think--” you cut yourself off before gently inhaling a pocket of air. You were sounding way too much like a certain explosive disgrace for your liking. You closed your eyes as you breathed out all of your frustrations.

“Hey, hey! What’s going on?!” Fae protectively shifted to fill the space between you and her little sister, “Farrah, there must be a mistake. This is my roommate, Y/N.”

Farrah.

A pretty name forever ruined by a slut.  

God, you wanted to beat her ass more than anything. It was as if all of your nerves were on fire and screaming a you to just do something.

Was this what Katsuki constantly felt like?

The violent beating of your eardrums was deafening and your vision was beginning to blur as you scowled at Fae’s sister.

Everything in your being yearned for you to switch to “instant kill mode”, but you couldn’t physically move. It was as if a small piece of you held your fury under control like a rabid dog on a chain-- or a parliament of higher beings had voted for you to keep your cool.

You sucked in one more time as your heart began to slow down. You gave one last, gentle huff as you continued to glare.

Farrah sent a scowl of her own back at you, “She is the one who—”

“This is the trash that slept with my boyfriend,” you deadpanned very flatly as your eyes slightly narrowed at her.  Fae’s jaw fell immediately at your words, but you continued talking despite her shock, “I just don’t see how she, of all people, could be upset in the situation. If you're upset at all, it should be at yourself. You have no class or self-worth, sleeping with an engaged man,” you crossed your arms as you reprimanded her and dared her to say something else as you intensified your stare.

You felt your heart jump as she stepped forward towards you, past Fae. It was as if it were excited by the idea that she may attack you so that you thoroughly beating the snot out of her would be justified.

Shit. What was wrong with you.

You kicked the persistent, animal-like thoughts off your leg as you continued to eye Farrah.

“You’re psychotic!!” she gasped as she threw her hands up, “I totally didn’t know Ground Zero even had a girl! psycho ass!”

Bull shit. You and Bakugou had both been plastered everywhere since your first sports festival at U.A. when you were fifteen. Since then you had both been in the eye of the media. It was pretty common knowledge that he wasn’t single. Your face scrunched up in disgust at her blatant lies as she continued, “She kicked me out of the apartment with nothing but my bare ass!!!”

“Yeah, you left your cheap ass, ratty ass clothes and your dignity that night too,” you rolled your eyes as the words flew out of your mouth.

“Woah, woah, woah! Calm down, everybody,” Fae looked as if she was on the brink of crying, “Farrah, I think you should leave for now, Okay?” She fiddled with her fingers.

“Yeah, I think so too.” As you pettily used your dancing fingers to wave, astonishment flashed across Fae’s expression. Honestly if your heart wasn’t thrumming against your chest so crazily right now, you would be horrified at how you were acting too, but the adrenaline that coursed throughout your body at the sight of the whore in the room numbed your mind.

Farrah struggled against her older sister as she tried to lead her away from the would-be battlefield, “No!! She is the one that needs to leave. You’re the one who pays rent around here, Sis!”

“Farrah, stop it!” Fae pleaded.

“WHY??” Farrah blurted before throwing a finger in your direction, “Newsflash, she is the one who is stealing your man from you now!” her voice raised an octave as she screeched, “Talk about hypocritical!” All of the color drained from Fae’s face as she threw horrified glances between you and her sister. Her mouth stumbled over itself as she tried to find words.

Your eyebrows congregated to the middle of your forehead as you tried to decipher the meaning of Farrah’s words.

Todoroki? Is that Fae’s man?

As if on cue, the front door to the house casually slid open, revealing a tired Todoroki.

All of the chaos that had been ensuing inside immediately halted as Todoroki froze in the doorway. His eyes snapped around as he saw the loose papers from Fae’s books that you hadn’t even noticed that you had thrown around with your quirk in your frustration, your completely furious expression and defensive stance, and Fae’s horrified form struggling to hold onto her crazed sister.

It was a lot to interpret.

“What… is going on,” he calmly questioned before he was assaulted with a boom of feminine screams.

“TELL HER TO LEAVE!”

“NO, TELL HER TO LEAVE! SHE DOESN’T EVEN LIVE HERE.”

“FARRAH, STOP!”

“NEITHER DO YOU, WHORE.”

Todoroki blinked in shock at the words that flew out of your mouth. He had never heard you used such a tone or choice of words with anyone—not even when you were against villains at U.A.. He hated to see you so upset, but he had no idea what to do with all of these women yelling at him, “Uh, Y/N...? Should we talk?” He questioned, causing Farrah to roll her eyes before she mouthed the word “see?” To her sister.

You huffed once more as you stormed towards the man, “Okay...” You begrudgingly agreed as you walked outside of the door, not even bothering to look him in the face. You couldn’t bring yourself to. Something just didn’t sit right with you.

As soon as he shut the front door behind him and walked down to the driveway a bit to meet up with where you had stormed off to, you threw a curve-ball at him,

“Just what is Fae to you?”

The question completely caught him off guard, but he immediately answered anyway, “Our roommate?”

“Obviously. But like. Did you and her… ever you know…” the thought alone made you feel queasy, “have something romantic.” You could have thrown up right then and there.

But his lack of reply made you feel a different type of sick. You blinked in surprise as the silence ensued before you spoke up, “You’re kidding,” you blurted.

“It’s not at all what you are thinking. There was chemistry for sure, but nothing ever happened. It wasn’t strong like you and I. When you came back there was no doubt in my mind that me and her were nothing.”

“That’s not what I’m upset about,” you threw pinched fingers to the brige of your nose and shook your head, trying to clear your thoughts, “Jesus, that poor girl.” So you really were just as much of a homewrecker, huh?

You thought there was one whore in that house but there were two.

“Fae is fine,” Todoroki moved to place a hand on your shoulder but you shifted away. He looked a bit shocked as he continued, “She had been dating here and there. She’s unaffected by the situation,” he calmly argued.

“God, Todoroki. That’s not the point,” you searched around your jacket pocket for your car keys. You had to get out of here. Even if you were in your house shoes.

“Im sorry, did I do something? Where are you going?” Todoroki’s calm demeanor slightly cracked as panicked undertones filled his question.

“I need to think,” you simply replied. Upon seeing his worried expression you immediately changed your answer, “I’ll… be back, okay? I just need a drive. We are still cool, okay? Friends,” you tried to sound enthused at the word.

“Okay… be safe.”

You slightly nodded at him before getting in your car and driving off.

You couldn’t believe it. You were slowly becoming everything that split you an Katsuki apart.

Your phone violently vibrating against your leg sent you flying out of your thoughts. Jesus, Kiri. He always called when you were trying to drive your frustration away—literally.

You groaned as you answered the phone.

“Hey!” His chipper voice had a slight undertone of panic to it, but your frustrated mind completely ignored it,

“What,” you deadpanned.

“Oh god, this isn’t a good time is it…?” he nervously laughed, causing your face to instantly shrivel up into a scowl,

“Just tell me what the fuck you want, Kirishima!” you blurted. A long silence filled the line, causing you to breath out heavily in a deep sigh. Way to go.

It was as if you were taking notes straight out of Katsuki’s book today. You just cursed at the sweetest guy on the planet. I mean, you might as well have just stomped on a puppy with both feet, “Look. I am sorry. I didn’t mean that... it’s just a long day…”

A pathetic excuse really. You realized this as soon as it came out of your mouth.

Kiri, being the happy souled fool he was, wholeheartedly accepted your pathetic excuse, “Maybe I should call back then...?” he suggested kindly.

“No, its okay, Kiri. What’s up?” you tried to smile as if he could see you—as if this gentle gesture would make up for how much of a colossal bitch you had just been.

“Well...” he dragged,  “Don’t you think maybe that it is about time you picked up your things from our apartment?”

You sighed, “…it’s really not a good time for me. I just..”

“WE CAUGHT THE HOUSE ON FIRE,” he cried out suddenly.

You held the phone closer to your ear as if you hadn’t heard him correctly, “Um. W-hwhat…?”

As soon as you spoke it triggered a tangent from the redhead, “Bakugou was really mad because he found out about you and Todoroki a few hours ago and he came home and wanted to vent his frustrations out, and we both know what that means, so we got to fighting and I punched him really hard, totally not manly of me by the way, and I pissed him off and then he exploded me and we set the house on fire!” he gasped for air, “I am so sorry!!” he exclaimed in a higher tone.

Your mind spun as you tried to take in all of the information that was being thrown at you at once. Finally it settled into your brain, “Oh my god!” you gasped, “Is he… is Katsuki okay?!”

“Yeah he is fine. He’s is in the hospital,” he brushed off.

“What!?! Where?!”

He quickly corrected himself at the sound of your heartbroken voice, “No, no! Not like that!” For some reason the concern in your voice for Bakugou made him happy, “He just needed a few little burn treatments! Anyway, we will probably be released tomorrow morning or night from the hospital, but—”

“We?!” you screeched.

“Yeah, I—”

“Kiri please tell me you did not just call me from a hospital bed,” you shook your head furiously.

“I just wanted to tell you that you should go pick up your things while Bakugou isn’t there, well what’s left of it anyway,” he gave an uneasy chuckle.

“Isn’t it still hot?”

“One of the firefighters had a cold quirk so everything turned out okay after they showed up. No other apartments were affected at all actually!” You still couldn’t believe this was all happening. You honestly hadn’t planned on grabbing your things from the apartment so soon. Then again, it had been months hadn’t it?

“So, are you going?” Kirishima snapped you back to reality.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll head over there right now,” you absentmindedly nodded even though he couldn’t see you. You hung up the phone after the two of you had spoken your farewells, but you could hardly remember the rest of the drive as you stood in front of your old home.

Your mind felt entirely numb as you gawked at the tall, polished building.

The crime scene—where the dreams that you had been building since you were fifteen years old came to die a gruesome death. You swiftly ducked under the fitting yellow tape as you made your way into the scorched portion of the home—your old room.

It was pretty much the only area that had been affected by the disaster as the rest of the home basically look exactly as you had remembered it to be—well minus the manly mess that Kiri tended to leave behind. You assumed Katsuki had been more strict on house rules since you left.

You walked up to what was left of your grandmother’s dresser and traced your fingers along the crumbling edges of the wood. You ended your trail as your fingers found their way onto an old frame. You couldn’t tell if picture was okay since a film of ash painted the fractured glass, but the frame seemed fine, as it resided in an area that hadn’t been touched by the inferno.

So then why was the glass cracked?

That’s when it hit you—it must have been the object that you had thrown at Farrah that night. You remembered that you threw something at her that shattered, but you never bothered to find out what.

Why the hell didn’t Katsuki fix it?

You curiously, but cautiously wiped the glass with the edge of your shirt.

What was revealed was the first picture the you and Bakugou had ever taken together. He was tied to a pole with a muzzle on at the U.A. sports festival award ceremony your freshman year. You had been standing next to him as he stood on the first-place podium on your very own third pace spot.

The memory quickly flooded into your mind.

That day when you fought him was the first time that he had ever acknowledged you. He actually congratulated you in his own way you supposed. He told you that you put up a really good fight. You couldn’t help but to shake your head at the recollection as a smile dared to pull the corner of your lips up.

“Y/N?” A loud, rough voice caused you to jump suddenly before you whipped yourself around. What you saw surprised you,

Katsuki? But he’s not even supposed to be here! Especially with bloodied bandages placed throughout his scratched up body!!

He looked just as surprised as you, “What the fuck?!” he exclaimed.

“That’s my line, you ass! I thought you were in the hospital!” you cried out as you hurriedly dropped the frame into a bag you had been using to gather some of your things.

“I’m fine,” he quickly readjusted his face from the previously shocked expression, “They’re crazy if they thought I was gonna stay overnight.”

“Jesus, Katsuki,” you shook your head in disappointment.

“What?!” he barked.

You simply continued to shake your head as you attempted to rush past him, “Nothing. I’m leaving.”

“Wait! Don’t,” he suddenly reached out to grab you but you harshly shrugged him away before sending a glare at him,

“Why? Have something to say?” Of course he didn’t. He hadn’t reached out to you in all of this time. Not since the day everything went down. But then again, he hardly talked with you when you lived together, so why would he even bother speaking to you after you broke up.

Still, a piece of you yearned for him to care about you enough to speak up as you searched his eyes for an ounce of affection. You saw none—just hurt and a splash of his usual flavor of rage.  

“That’s what I thought,” your voice surprisingly croaked as you spoke. You turned away from him and began to walkaway, halting as he called out to you once more,

“You and Icyhot? REALLY?” he roared behind you, “I bet you were just waiting on me to fuck up so you’d have an excuse to crawl back to him, weren’t you?”

You whipped yourself back to furiously scowl at him. Of course that’s the first thing he wants to talk about after all this time, “You have zero right to judge me for moving on quickly even if I was fucking him!”

“So you’re not?!” he didn’t sound very convinced as he stormed up to you.

“Bakugou, that’s none of your business!” you didn’t back away as you challenge him. He hated it when you used his last name, “So what if I am?!” you exclaimed as tears pricked the backs of your eyes.

“I gave you a damned ring—we were getting married next fucking month!!” as his voice cracked your eyes were drawn to his arms that he intensely held on either side of him. His hands were quietly quivering in rage as he continued, “Of course it’s my fucking business!”

You snapped back regardless of his dangerously pissed off state. He is still trying to defend himself like he did nothing wrong after all this fucking time, “I gave you my ENTIRE being Katsuki!! I gave you my trust and my whole heart and everything else I could muster up and more!!!” You screamed at the top of your voice. Tears freely rolled down your tired cheeks at this point,

“So fucking what if you gave me a hunk of metal with a few gems?! What else did you give me? Huh?! What else did you offer up to me? Affection? Consideration? Loyalty??” your voice heavily cracked on the last word as you stared at the seemingly unphased man in front of you.

He held a glare as if it were permanently plastered onto his expression, yet he didn’t say anything in return, so you continued speaking after shakily gathering up a spare breath,  “God, I still think about you in practically everything that I do…” you cried as you pathetically stared at the ground in front of you. Bakugou’s fierce red eyes continued to burn holes into your image as you spoke,

“…but you probably only care that some other man is stomping around on your territory. You haven’t even reached out to me past the initial weekend when shit hit the fan,” you looked back up to see him still glaring at you intensely. You couldn’t tell if he was judging you or if he hated you. Probably a mix of the two.

What a condescending asshole.

“What?! Stop fucking looking at me! Say something dammit!” you pushed him away from you and was surprised by how good it felt, “Anything!!” you pleaded as you pushed him back again towards the living room.

He still said nothing as he threw his glare away from you and toward the ground. You groaned in annoyance before shoving him back again. Why was he always so damn quiet when you actually wanted him to speak up?

“Fight me back, dammit!” you didn’t even care that you sounded like him anymore. Maybe it’s what he wanted from you the entire time as his mastermind meticulously chipped away at the persona that you had been building all of your life. Well, if it’s what he wanted, you would be more than happy to oblige in this case, “You like to pick fights don’t you?!” you screamed as you used your entire body and shoved him once last time, actually tripping him.

The two of you fell and you toppled on top of him as your tears transformed into sobs, “Just do something, you grimy ass bastard! I know you want to!” you weakly pounded against his chest as sobs continued to tear themselves from your throat.

Bakugou truthfully had no words to speak as he watched your heartbroken form collapse on his chest.

He wanted so desperately to say something.

He wanted to tell you everything that he was feeling, and more than anything he wanted to hold you close to him and comfort you.

But it was as If something in the fibers of his being stopped him from doing so as you laid broken on top of him.

It had always been that way with you.

Every time he had opened his mouth to say something affectionate to you, something vile and downright disrespectful would fly out instead. Every time he wanted to reach out to you and touch you gently, all of the wrong muscles spasmed and he would do something completely erroneous.

It had been easier to neglect you at the time, rather than face you and hurt you, or fix himself even. But it was beyond fixing himself now.

Even so, he wanted to show you at least once that he was capable of doing something fucking right.

He owed you at least that.

He closed his eyes and he sharply grabbed your face and pressed it down onto his own as gently as he could. His hands were still shaking, not from anger as you had assumed, but from fear. He was terrified that you would completely abandon him without ever knowing how much he cared about you.

You whimpered into his mouth out of pure surprise as he continued to move his lips against your own, but you almost instantaneously settled down against him as relief surged throughout your body.

It felt as if a weight had been lifted from your being.

You found yourself kissing him back for only a moment more before you yanked yourself away from him, “No… no, no Katsuki….” You softly cried with wide eyes as you scooted away from him, “What are we doing!?”

“I know it’s over,” he said very flatly, “Between us, I mean.”

The sentence unexpectedly sent your heart falling deeply into your chest, “Wha—”

“Just shut up a moment and listen to me,” he interrupted you sharply. A thick silence enveloped the two of you for a beat as he seemed to internally kick himself for his harsh wording before he awkwardly shifted himself to sit next to you. His arms struggled to find their way around you as he lamely gathered you into his arms and pulled you close to him, “Just…. don’t look at me,” he grumbled, “I won’t be able to say the shit that I mean if you look.”

You couldn’t even find the time question what he had meant as he quickly continued,

“You... are the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I know I didn’t always act like it, but it’s true, dammit. I know that I couldn’t show it to you. It’s like my mind and my body were split on what to do. I wanted to hold you like this every night, but my body just wouldn’t let me… It’s just so damn confusing,” he finished with a croak.

He shook his head at himself before continuing, “I should have fucking done it anyway. I should have woken up early to make you breakfast more than just the once. I should have worked less so you wouldn’t have to spend days without me. I should have given you that ring sooner. I never should have slept with that woman. Drunk or not—but that goes without saying. I am so sorry, Y/N. You did not deserve this.”

You couldn’t help but to look up at him, but your heart broke as you saw heavy tears falling from his eyes.

He could feel your eyes on him but he found the resolve to continue regardless, “Anyway, I know it’s over now. I can feel it. What we had is over,” he fought himself from sobbing, “I’ll never see that ring on you again, and I don’t deserve to either. I didn’t deserve a lot of things I got growing up, but I definitely didn’t deserve you,” he sounded as if he was trying to convince himself, “I don’t think I can change who I am to be what you need me to be. You deserve more than what I can give you right now. And....” he tried to pull the words out of himself, “if Half n’ Half can do it, then I should let you go that way.”

He sighed. You weren’t sure if you had ever heard him sigh before. It shocked you as he continued, “I used to think you were keeping me from winning, and I was stupid to think that,” he rested his head on top of yours, “I’m just dragging you down onto my level at this point,” he shook his head, “but I won’t let that shit happen,” he finally dropped his face to look you in the eyes, “I love you so much, Y/N,” he whispered to you before pressing a painful kiss onto your forehead.

Was this even the same man you had known for almost half of your life?

“I-I love you too. I really do,” you stuttered as astonishment enveloped your body. The two of you sat in a bittersweet silence for a few moments before his gruff, substantially more put together voiced sounded once more,

“As much I hate to say this,” he lowly began as he moved you over and stood up, “you should go,” he held a hand to you to help you up.

Your hand faltered toward his own before you reluctantly accepted his gesture, doubts filling you mind. Bakugou, ever perceptive, noticed your reluctance and immediately cleared the air as he opened the front door for you,

“If Mismatch ever treats you half as bad as I did, I will set him on fire,” he lowly stated. The Bakugou you grew up with suddenly reappeared.

“He has a fire quirk… I don’t think that will work,” you tried to joke, but honestly your heart was hurting so much.

“Fucking watch me,” he smiled at you.

Genuinely smiled.

Your heart melted at the rare scene in front of you and your weak legs could barely make it out of the door.

After moments of staring at each other, you returned a small, sad smile at him before you walked out of the apartment and shut the door behind you.

What... just happened? You turned back around to face the door and placed your hand on the knob. You let it sit for a moment before you slowly retracted it, cursing under your breath.

On the other side, Bakugou knew that he had made the correct decision letting you go to Todoroki, but the pain in his heart begged him to follow after you.

However, the doubts and reluctance to do so further solidified his decision. He wasn’t ready to be the man you needed. Yet.

He had a lot of maturing to do before he could truly love his soulmate.

Soulmate.

The thought sent flutters into his worn down heart.

A reminder of the faith that he had that you two would find your way back to each other one day.

[kisekinodrabbles]

helloo! i'd like to request something for the prompt game please :D kasamatsu + band!au + strangers to lovers + dialogue number 14 if that's okay? thanks, sam! and welcome back~

ofc!!! i tried to keep it shorter but im a bit rusty w my kasamatsu hehe hope u enjoy! wc: 2.3k

Kasamatsu admits that balancing his band and college work isn’t exactly an easy task. Between late evenings spent at gigs and all nights at the library, he is on the brink of his sanity, standing right at the tipping point. He yawns as he enters his nine am mandatory calculus class, another mistake made in his overconfidence that he would somehow be able to get his shit together.

You, on the other hand, are a closeted fan of his band, sitting three rows behind him in class. Every Tuesday and Thursday, you watch him drag his feet in and his hand lifting to his mouth in a yawn. Quickly, you duck behind your book as if Kasamatsu would ever give you the time of day. The brunette is well-known on campus with his successful group and good looks, not to mention he also dabbles a little in basketball while also maintaining a decent grade point average across all his classes. Triple threat, they call him.

When you first came into class and saw him there, shocked is an understatement. You’ve been following his band his high school from across the country. To see him in the flesh, so real and so human with his tired eyes, it almost feels like a dream. One you hope nobody would ever pinch you awake from. Thus, you made it your goal to be there before him every morning, which is a feat in itself. Kasamatsu may be grinding through the night and falling asleep in lectures, but he’ll be damned if he shows up late to class.

Throughout several weeks, you’ve seen girls come up to him left and right, shot down almost immediately by his intention to focus on the professor’s words. He lets them down easy and makes it clear that he pays thousands of dollars to study, not play IRL Tinder. This man gets sexier everyday.

You take your time packing your things when class is over, mainly because you’re too distracted watching Kasamatsu do the same. He is blind, or chooses to ignore, the whispers and shy glances thrown his way. Perhaps this is why you haven’t approached him yourself. You’re just one of his many admirers, a stroke in the massive painting of his life. Sighing, you pick up your pitiful self and make your way to the dining hall where you’re supposed to meet your friend for breakfast.

When the two of you settle on a table, you begin your weekly rambling about how beautiful Kasamatsu looks in the morning. Moriyama, being the good friend that he is, nods and listens intently.

Moriyama is an intriguing character. The two of you met because he had tried a line on you. In your perpetual state of flustered embarrassment, you had stupidly confessed to him: “Sorry, my heart belongs to Kasamatsu Yukio.”

In another twist of fate, he revealed that he had actually gone to high school with the guy and knew him pretty well.

“You know I can introduce you to him, right? No need for all this pining and drooling from three feet away.”

“It’s not the same,” you argue, “he’s practically a living legend on campus. I’m too intimidated to even breathe in the same air as him.” Your obsession has perhaps taken you too far, but if you expect to continue being his fan, the last thing you want is to scare him away.

“You’re so overdramatic,” Moriyama rolls his eyes. Coming from him, this sentence means a lot.

“What? It’s not my fault Kasamatsu’s so hot. He could bang me so hard backstage then pretend I don’t exist and I would still pay to watch his next show,” you groan, spooning yogurt into your mouth.

In that moment, several things happen. Moriyama’s eyes widen and fly behind you. Footsteps sounding at that same spot suddenly cease completely. You, realizing what possibly just happened, feel the heat flare up your cheeks.

Kasamatsu, in his sleep deprived state and probably completely delirious, had stopped in his tracks. His head whipped around to the source of the comment, finding Moriyama sitting with someone who looks distinctly familiar, but he can’t quite put his finger on it.

“Kasamatsu—”

Before Moriyama can even finish his sentence, Kasamatsu is already blurting out. “Okay, maybe I’m crazy but did I just hear you say that out loud?”

You want to crawl into your hole six feet underground and never see the light of day again. Ducking your head, you don’t even want to chance a glance up. The utter mortification is chewing away at your bones and you wish you could just evaporate into thin air.

Moriyama quickly interjects with a quick laugh, “Hear what? Also how have you been, man? I haven’t seen you in forever. Come join us for breakfast.”

Kasamatsu’s brows pucker. Maybe he really is going insane. And horny. Which is a very bad combination. Nevertheless, he slides into the empty seat next to Moriyama. He stares at you for a few seconds, squinting, before snapping his fingers. “Oh, I remember now. You’re in my calculus class.”

He knows you? “How do you know me?” you squeak, cursing your fangirl self for losing your voice. You never speak up in class, always choosing to come up to your professor for questions at the end of lecture. You’re quiet and tucked away behind him, so you never expected him to recognize you.

The smile he sends you is blinding. Even with shadows under his eyes, he still looks gorgeous. “You’re always first to arrive and last to leave. Figured you’re a hard worker in class and probably acing it.”

Your mouth dries. Kasamatsu noticed you. He actually noticed you. “Oh, um, I’m okay. I’m okay in class, I mean.”

“The question you should be asking is her name, Kasamatsu,” Moriyama scolds, smacking his back.

Kasamatsu pinks sheepishly. “Sorry, yeah. I’m Kasamatsu Yukio, by the way.”

Idiotically, you blurt out “I know” before your name. When you finally introduce yourself, you also clarify, “I’m a huge fan of Blue Devils. I mean, I’ve been following you guys since like high school. Absolutely love your music.”

The man actually reddens even further, but still he beams proudly. “Thank you! That’s crazy. Have you been to our shows?”

Almost all of them. “A couple, yeah.”

“We have one tonight in an actual venue. Are you coming?”

“Ah, it was sold out before I could get a ticket, actually.”

Kasamatsu blinks, “Oh, you’re more than welcome to come. I can get you a pass. Both of you—if Moriyama’s interested.”

“That would be amazing!” You grin, “Is there anything I can get you in return? I don’t want to just accept a gift from you for free.”

“Well, if you are good at calc, I wouldn’t mind some extra tutoring,” he suggests with a teasing grin.

Moriyama rolls his eyes, “Just ask her out instead of using tutoring as an excuse.” The two of you sputter, face colored a dark shade of red. You’ll kick his ass when you get the chance.

—

That one mistake turned out to be the greatest opportunity of your life. In addition to attending his show that night and meeting all of his bandmates, each one more good looking up close than then other, you manage to have weekly study sessions (you’re holding off on calling it dates) with Kasamatsu. The two of you take turns booking rooms at the library to cram, which mainly consists of you reexplaining concepts to the man. Although he isn’t a bad student, he’s also still struggling a bit to keep up.

“Hey” is what you hear before you feel a warm surface press against your cheek. You look up to find Kasamatsu with a steaming cup in hand. Gratefully accepting it, you catch a whiff of freshly brewed tea. You take a sip and smile. Black tea, no sugar. “Just the way I like it.”

“Noticed you never add anything to your tea,” Kasamatsu says almost proudly.

You raise the cup to him in thanks. Both of you go through your usual routine—you focusing on reviewing material for next week while Kasamatsu pores over his notes from this week, occasionally poking you to ask questions.

Honestly, a big part of you still wonders if this is all a dream. This guy you’ve been crushing on for years is sitting in the flesh right across from you. You peek at him from time to time, watching the way he frowns at his book. His blue, almost grey, eyes shine underneath the flickering lights. Even the way his lips curl unhappily is cute.

When he catches you staring, you quickly drop your gaze back to your laptop, missing the way he smiles quietly.

“Will you come to our show this weekend?” He asks as the two of you pack up.

“Ah, I have a shift at my part-time job.”

He looks surprised, “That late?”

You shrug, “Food never sleeps, I guess. It’s at the burger diner by campus.”

“Oh, are you guys open late?”

“Close at one.”

He nods, “Maybe I’ll see you there after then. The guys usually get really hungry after a gig so we can drive some business your way. I’ll make sure they tip well too.”

Your heart warms at the thought. It’s a thoughtful gesture but you’re even more thrilled at the prospect of seeing him. “Sounds good.”

True to his word, Kasamatsu brings the guys to your workplace at midnight after their show ended. They order quite a spread, practically everything on the menu. Kasamatsu goes as far as to help you carry orders to their table. You shoot him an appreciative smile.

Over the time your friendship has bloomed, Kasamatsu has been nothing but a gentleman. He walks you home to your dorm if you’re studying late into the night. He meets you in class with a muffin or a cookie from his early Starbucks runs. Surprisingly, he begins placing himself next to you each session. “This is better anyway,” he mutters. “Two birds, one stone.”

His vague words had you tilting your head in question.

“I don’t have random people coming up to me to sit with me and, well, I get to enjoy your company.” It’s a nice thought—him enjoying your company, that is. He had blushed a little when he realized what you said, but chose to direct his attention to the slides pulled up before him, missing the way you hide your smile behind your sleeve.

Now, you hear the rowdy boys chattering on as they devour their meal as if it’s their last. They speak through mouthfuls of burgers and fries, but you find the sight endearing, mainly because you’ve never seen Kasamatsu so relaxed. It’s quite refreshing really. Your attention is piqued when you hear one of them ask: “So doing it tonight huh?”

Kasamatsu retorts with a “shut the fuck up” and flings a fry his way. The way the other guy wiggles his brows suggestively has you freezing. What if he was meeting up with someone tonight? What if he was going to do the deed?

Somewhere in the distance, you hear the faint cracking of your heart. Of course, Kasamatsu is popular. It’s no surprise he’s got his nights covered as well. You sigh dejectedly, feeling the hope inside you crumble into dust. The rest of your shift goes by rather uneventfully, but you try to avoid going to their table too much, lest you hear more details about Kasamatsu’s planned tryst. The man himself steals glances your way, wondering if you’ll be checking on them anytime soon.

“Your check,” you smile as you set the bill on the table, “I got the owner to give you a discount since you guys ordered a good amount.”

All of their eyes seem to sparkle as they thank you in unison, their synchrony almost puzzling. As you move to pick up the bill and change, Kasamatsu catches your hand before you move away. “What time does your shift end?”

“Half an hour. Why?”

The other guys are already packing up their things and giving you little waves as they exit the restaurant, leaving the two of you alone. “I’ll walk you home, it’s late,” he murmurs, fingers still wrapped around your wrist.

“Oh, you don’t have to! I usually take the bus back anyway so it’s no big deal.” You want to confirm whether he had plans that night anyway. You’d hate to be in the way of that.

He shakes his head, “I insist. Also, um, are you doing anything tomorrow?”

“Catching up on studying most likely.”

“Oh,” he pauses, “if you have time tomorrow night, do you want to catch a movie with me? Maybe dinner after?”

You blink at him in surprise. Now that you’re looking at him properly, you notice that his cheeks are several shades darker than the red neon glow of the diner sign. He’s shifting on his feet and his other hand finds purchase on the strap of his bag, fidgeting with the material. “Um, like a date?”

“Y-yeah,” he stutters slightly, his throat moving as he swallows. “Sorry, I probably should’ve made that clear,” he coughs, “b-but if you don’t want it to be the we can also go as friends.” Perhaps you’ve tortured the boy long enough but you can’t help but relish in his awkward chuckle as his hand lifts to rub the back of his neck nervously.

Biting back a huge grin, you nod. “It’s a date.”

Kasamatsu’s eyes light up and a pleased grin spread across his face. “It’s a date.”

The hollering outside the building has the two of you whipping to face the window where his bandmates have their faces pressed up against the surface, laughing and smiling to congratulate and embarrass their friend. Kasamatsu flushes, “I’ll see you later to pick you up.”

You nod but he’s already out the door, leaping to kick his friends away. “You stupid idiots!”

Laughing, you watch as the group makes kissy faces at Kasamatsu all the while the man fruitlessly attempts to shut them up. He really is cute.

[curiousscientistkae]

im going to get on a soap box a bit lol. Again, I hate I have to do this but some people can’t grasp others have different opinions this is just me venting. It’s tagged as it should be, under the cut, and I am not here to like go after anyone. Only say how i feel and maybe get others to at least understand a different side. You dont not have to read this and if you disagree with me, just ignore this post, block it, block me. I DON’T WANT TO ARGUE I just want to fuckin vent and express how I feel

anyway idk I am just very tired rn with how much the internet eats up c//a and like puts it on a pedestal. I can rant about how I don’t feel like it should have it or how it was poorly written or how it COULD have been great but falls short. But what I want to talk about is

how fuckin tiring it is to see it all the time when it is fucking triggering. Yes, I block the tags on like tumblr. I am happy i follow people who like tag that and if something gets untagged i block the post or maybe unfollow the person. If i am in the tags and see it somehow or someone it the icon, I block. I do it for my own sake

but so many other sites are not like that. Fuck joining discord servers now I am a bit on edge cause lol I don’t know who will have that as an icon and if they do I will block. or if people start to talk about it, I have to think to myself “will I be thought of as a ‘villain’ for asking to spoiler it or not talk about c/a at all” because yes a lot of people will respect me and my trigger but I have see SO many people disrespect people hurt by s/pop and c//a. So many times have people put us down or say we are not abuse victims or don’t understand it when MANY of us have been abused. When many of us see ourselves in Adora or wanted Catra to get better and saw us in her also. I cannot speak for everyone but so many of us wanted this to work out one way or another and all we got was a trigger and being bullied and harassed and told our abuse isn’t real (or we are racist or X-phobic when many of us are poc or queer)

there is just like no escaping c/a and it SUCKS as someone who is triggered by it. It sucks on sites where blocking is not as good as it is here, I have to play russian roulette. Fuck on youtube ill be watching a video and BAM a random c//a clip. It so fuckin tiring

and i loved s/pop. I relate to Adora so much so and that is why it hurts so much. ive been abused, I have been in toxic relationships, and I wanted good things for Adora and yet, now I got a trigger because s/pop was so poorly handled.

again I am not here to attack anyone, if you find comfort in c//a I am not here to change your mind. The fact of the matter is so many people got hurt by this. That there is another side to the story and we have been left in the dust. And it  just is tiring to be now walking on eggshells because you say one bad thing (which guess what you are allowed! to criticize shows you like! its how we learn from mistakes and get better!!!) and then you have a horde of people attacking you and saying your trauma, your experiences as a queer person or abused person or person of color is not valid at all.

it just fuckin sucks man

[dazaisfavoritewife]

Bakusquad with a black s/o - Someone calls you a racial slur

This idea has been on my mind for SO LONG! You might be wondering, “Then author-Chan, why didn’t you write it before?” WELL BECAUSE IM LAZY- So, I hope you enjoy :) -btw I’m going to use female pronouns, so if you want a male version or part 2 let me know-

~~~~~~~~

Bakugo

He is so appreciative, like this dude could care less about what skin color you are, but he just thinks your skin is BEAUTIFUL! Like, YES!! Racist Karen’s? Mans gotcha back.

But this one time, a racist bitch, *cough* BETHANY *cough* she called you a racial slur (even if I am african American i’m not saying it) and you obviously had to mop the floor with a hoe!

“Y/N, stay the f*ck away from my man!” Bethany screamed at you, you just rolled your eyes and stared straight at her.

“I’m sorry? Who’s your man?”

“Bakugo! You know that you ni-“

Oops! Bethany accidentally fell on your foot.. Then your hand.. Then your knee... She got beat the fuck up. While you were beating the absolute hell out of Bethany, the bell rang, but you were too busy with Bethany to notice that everyone was heading to lunch.

You snatched her by her hair, and started beating the crap out of her, when everyone saw they were frozen just there like ‘O’ but, Bakugo was cheering you on.

“YEAH! BEAT HER ASS N/N!”

You still didn’t give a fuck and just smirked, until your home room teacher, Aizawa came into the hallway.

“L/N! Bakugo! Detention after school!”

Best believe you just looks at him like, ‘N what?’

Bakugo just shrugged, and aizawa told us to go to lunch.

“This isn’t over Bethany..”

Then you just dropped her, grabbed Bakugo, and skipped to lunch, him proudly walking with you while everyone just stared at you in disbelief at how you’re acting like nothing happened after you just beat the shit out of a hoe. Not sorry!

Kirishima

Like Bakugo, he thinks you’re beautiful! He also thinks you’re real manly, because there are so many people who don’t think you belong in ua because of your skin, but he just deals with them himself.

But one day, someone took it too far and three girls game up to you and their leader just started insulting you, and one of them said a racial slur, you weren’t having it.

“Oh look! It’s Y/N! I thought you would’ve given up on becoming a hero, I mean how could you be popular when you look like.. That?”

“Like what? A badass? A queen? Beautiful? At least I don’t have 55 layers makeup, I have a thing called natural beauty.”

“What beauty? All we see is a ni-“

Oh no! They all somehow ended up on the floor with a bloody nose! Oops! You accidentally made your boot and their head best friends..

“I’m sorry, I can’t *thump* hear you other the *thump* noise! *thump thump thump*”

Needless to say, you beat all their asses. And in an instant you’d beat anyone and everyone’s ass if they even dared say a racial slur.

So, while in the process of beating three bitches asses, all of class 1-A came out of home room because aizawa wanted them to come and get you because you’re their friend, and they saw you beating the fuck out of three girls at the same time, and they all just stared at you in awe, and shock, except for Iida. He was against it obviously. And Bakugo, Mina, and Kaminari were cheering you on.

“Yeah Y/N! Kick their ass!”

“You got this Y/N!”

“Yeah! Whatever reason you did this, great job!”

“L/N That is not appropriate in school or outsie of it! Please refrain from beating people up!

Aizawa heard cheering and yelling outside the classroom and got annoyed, and went to check to see you beating three girls asses and the Bakusquad, (this time all of them) cheering you on.

“Is there a good reason for this? Otherwise detention.”

“These *thump* bitches *thump* thought they could try *thump thump thump* call me a racial slur.” Iida shut the fuck up real quick, and everyone was shocked that he actually started routing for you!

“...Continue.”

Then he walked back in the classroom. We stan men who don’t support racist bitches.

Kaminari

Kaminari respects you, you don’t take anyone's shit. Plus you’re beautiful, that’s a bonus to him. There were two particular people once who were giving you weird looks because of your skin, you just laughed in their face while Kaminari electrocuted them, then brought him home after he short circuited.

But one stupid bitch didn’t know how badass you are. So they tried using a racial slur, but we all know we don’t stand them. So this bitch named Rachel walked up to you and just started trash talking.

“Why are you even in the hero course? You don’t deserve it.”

“Because I earned it. You don’t deserve to be in ua at all if you’re bullying someone superior to a lowlife.”

“Whatever, you’re just a ni-“

She didn’t get to finished her sentence before you just roundhouse kicked a bitch, then just started beating the crap out of her.

“Say it again. I DARE you.”

While you were beating the shit out of her, class 1-A and aizawa just heard a bunch of loud and some very quiet crashes and thumps, and a lot of yelling.

“What in the entire world is going on out there..” Aizawa mumbled.

All of class 1-A including aizawa opened the door and walked into the hallway, to see you literally slamming her face into a locker, and occasionally kicking and punching her.

“Holy shit..”

Everyone was stunned, but Bakugo was laughing his ass off.

“L/N, what are you doing!?”

“SHUT UP IIDA!”

“U-uhm L/N..? Why are you hurting that person..?”

“THEY TRIED, THEY REALLY TRIED ME!”

“What did they do?”

“SHE THIUGHT SHE COUKD SAY A RACIAL SLUR”

“YOU GO! THATS MY GIRL!”

“Oh, everyone back in the classroom. Everything’s fine.”

Then they just went back into class like their classmate wasn’t beating the shit out of a girl. Needless to say, someone had to pull you off of her before you killed her.

Sero

Sero is a supportive king, and very underated. He thinks you’re the most beautiful women he’s ever met, and mans is extremely protective because once someone made a comment about your skin and you just ignored it but it kinda hurted :(

But one fateful day for two boys, they made the terrible mistake of saying a racial slur, they really thought they did something by getting beat the fuck up.

“I don’t know why they let YOU in the hero course.”

“I don’t know what led YOU to believe I’mma take your shit.”

“Whatever. You’re just a ni-“

And he just magically fell to the floor! Oh no! His buddy accidentally got slammed into him after! Damn it, they accidentally made contact with your boot!!

Class 1-A and 1-B heard you beating the shit out of the boys, so the teachers went into the hallway to see what the commotion is, but the students being their nosy selves went to see too.

Mr. Aizawa and Mr. Vlad King went into the hallway to see you beating the fuck out of two kids, class 1-A and 1-B looked through the door, and Bakugo just started cheering you on, so did Sero.

“Yes Y/N! Fuck em up!”

“I knew I chose the right one! Yes Y/N!”

Kendo being one of your friends, started cheering you on too.

“Go Y/N! Yes queen!”

Aizawa just turned around and walked back into the classroom after telling the students to go back to their seats. Vlad king broke you away from them though.. Aw shit you got detention.

Mina

(I got lazy on Sero’s because after Kirishima I took a break and started writing Kaminari’s after, and it’s 1 AM so I’m tired and watching YouTube to stay awake, this is probable gonna be shitty, they all are honestly.. I’m sorry btw I believe the theory that Mina is black so roll with it if you don’t)

Mina knows that you’re the most beautiful wiman alive, and you’re her queen, and vise versa.

One day this bitch named Ashley decided to insult your guys’ relationship and called you a racial slur, you definitely weren’t having it when it comes to Mina.

“Hey Y/N I heard you’re dating a girl.. That’s gross.”

“Hey Ashley, I heard you eat d*ck. That’s gross.”

“You’re a nasty ni-“

Ashley couldn’t finish her sentence because she was slammed into the locker, and became best friends with your fist and boot, whoops!

So, everyone was heading home because the final bell rang and everyone was packing up, and they were leaving their classrooms, and they all saw you beating the shit out of Ashley, and Mina was just smiling the widest smile that shines so bright, and she started cheering you on with Bakugo.

“Yes my queen! Beat her ass!”

“Yeah Y/N! Beat that extra!”

You got one last HARD kick in, before aizawa came up to you and pulled you off.

“Let me go!”

“Why were you even harming a student?”

“BECAUSE THIS HOMOPHOBIC BITCH CAME UP TO ME AND STARTED TALKING ABOUT ME AND MINA AND ADDED IN JUST THE CHERRY ON TOP AND CALLED ME A RACIAL SLUR!”

Aizawa went quiet and so did everyone else, then he just let you go and walked away, and everyone else just left the school like it was a normal day, we stand most of the people here.

(In case you’re confused on why it said Raven I accidentally put my name for this kind of stuff,sorry)

[junisfics]

i have to say when i first saw the incel headcanons come up.. they did make me uncomfortable just due to the fact that as a person of color, incels continuously harass black ppl & nbpoc on the internet constantly. so for white people incel meant someone who has never known the touch of another person or someone who has never had sex but for a lot of black &nbpoc it means something a lot more, it means someone who hates minorities, believes in white supremacy, has misogynistic views. it’s just another example of ur privilege as a white person because u had the privilege of not being exposed to real incels. im not gonna sit here and say it’s not your fault because so much knowledge surrounds us; I will say for as long as I’ve been following you (quietly : I normally don’t send asks) I know your intention was never to be malicious. yes, it’s great you apologized but at the end of the day, this is the bare minimum and people shouldn’t be praising you for such, you are still a good person but white people get praised for doing, again, the bare minimum. I throughly enjoy your content and that’s why I wrote this; I’m not trying to be mean or attack you. I’m just tired of white people getting praised for learning about black & nbpoc struggles before it’s too late meanwhile we, as minorities, have had to accustom ourselves to society, while white people still get to use being “uneducated” as an accuse to hurt us.

yes i understand completely

i knew that ignorance was harmful but i never really knew the extent of such until now. and i'm so sorry i had to figure out in a way that was so painful and upsetting to people that have supported me.

i wanted to let you know that the praise is making me rather uncomfortable as well on top of it. me learning from my mistakes should be considered normal, it should be something everyone should do... especially regarding a situation that you don't know the true weight of. i cant imagine how frustrating it is to see white people being praised for doing the bare minimum.

i greatly appreciate you for taking the time to further explain how my ignorance in itself is a form of my privilege.

[scoobydoogenre]

Allura and the political mascot-ing of dark skin/Black women

(btw I'm super dyslexic, I make a ton of mistakes but you'll have to live with it.)

I wasn't that much into voltron after a few seasons, but Allura was mine and a lot of people's favorite. And of course like most people, I was upset when she had to die. And did that feel necessary to her arc as a character? literally no.

The reason for this problem isn't as simple as "They didn't know how to write a dark skin character." While that's true there's even more to it. It's relates how Black women (in this case I will use Black cuz that's how people in the fandom and crew saw her and connected her experiences even tho she wasn't human. e.i. the image above) are often expected by society to be saviors and educator, even at the expense of their own lives.

Allura was depicted as a white, blonde hair, and blue eyed alien princess in the original and every other adaptation before Legendary defender. For viewers of those series there was never a problem with that, and how she was depicted because she was a default. White/ ambiguous light skinned characters are inherently raceless, their experiences are never tied to be race or ethnicity. Well you why, as art media, and practically everything has featured white people as the subject, their likeness and standards then became the default setting of society. which is why people don't even consider whiteness to be racialized. Because people of color don't fit into that supposed default of "whitness", they become "the other". The moment that Allura became dark skin, or Black, her existence becomes viewed as racialized in conjunction to what was a "white" or "default" setting.

Often times fans don't quite know who to deal with character's whose race is stated in some sort of explicit manner. Even creators may not know who to deal the nuances creating characters of color. because for most white fans and creators lives they lived in world world where their race was never a defining factor to who they are as people. In spaces like fandoms that are predominantly white, characters of color then either stands out or left completely ignored because of their racialized existence. In this case Allura (even the other poc in voltron) stood at as being the first since the original and adaptions to deviate from was the "norm".

Media is the closing this some non-Black will have to understanding the experiences of Black people. and it's damaging when the only thing they see is color first then a person. an even more damaging when they only see black death rather than life. So how does Allura fit into this? because she became racialized she is then aligned and then stuck in hole where they can only fight against race, talk about race and have trauma due to race. or in Allura's case the galra. because that is what the experience is thought to be. And that is unfortunately what people this Black characters are good for, race and politics. Allura was the face of the revolution against the galra, and stopped at nothing to bring peace even at the expense of her life.

Im not saying people can't revolutionaries, lol, racism is real, and activist fight for what right in our best interest. What is tiring is the fact there's the constant use of race trauma and allegory for the entertaining non-Black people. Remember once again, Allura is an ALIEN, but she is aligned and racialized to be Black (remember the image above). Falling into the trope of the strong black women, serving others in disregard to her own best interest. Even adultified because it's was difficult for fans to see her a teenager. Much of the burden of revolution and war fell on Allura, just as it falls to many Black women today.

Black women became the face of left-leaning politics, trendy a caricature, to prove a point. The Black women became a single face and monolith rather that diverse individuals with different experiences. It's quite rare, especially in tv animation to see more than one type of black women feeling and expression all types of emotion and challenges compared to their white counterparts. They may exist some where, but in the modern zeitgeist especially in fandoms there not as popular.

Was the face of revolution, and had to die in order become a savoir. The death of her individuality for the sake of these issues, of saving the entire world, despite her own interest because it so desperately was on her shoulders.

[quinnfebrey]

the picture is definitely blown out of proportion but that doesnt mean that she doesnt perpetuate racism in other ways. objectifying Black women as anon mentioned, whatever wildest dreams was, & presenting herself as a self-made legend instead of acknowledging her privilege. this isnt to say that shes a horrible person or her music sucks. im just tired of the way so many of her fans praise her as The™ lgbtq & feminist icon while ignoring or even criticizing openly lgbtq artists of color.

honestly i feel like i have a very different experience in the fandom bc all the people i follow are aware of her problematic tendencies and openly criticize her (so much so that there was like month long discourse over whether we were too mean and drove her off tumblr). i would agree tho that there is a LOT of racism in this fandom—poc fans would know, bc we get the brunt of it—and that definitely has helped taylors mistakes go unnoticed

idk abt the other point bc someone can be self made and privileged at the same time lol and i would argue that taylor IS self made, it shouldn’t be a question. did her relentless hard work get her ahead bc she was a young, marketable, upper middle class blonde girl? sure. but i wouldn’t lump her in with someone that just got everything handed to them like one of the jenner siblings

as for her music, her consistent themes of being accepted and hiding and undertones of fear of scrutiny resonate very heavily with the lgbt community and while i agree we shouldn’t be pushing her as a massive lgbt icon above actually lgbt artists, it really shouldn’t be a surprise that lgbt people have flocked to her music 

i don’t like whataboutisms so i’m not going to bring up anyone specific but i personally think allowing problematic behavior to go unchecked is a celebrity issue overall, not just a taylor one. like pls a singer said two slurs within the span of like a week and no one cares lmfao

[anne-white-star]

Au Cheetah!third doctor x reader

Notes : y/n and the doctor go on a adventure to a planet together and the doctor catches the Cheetah virus along the way. read to find out what happends 

Please ignore any spelling mistakes thank you 😊

Im so sorry this is a big mess😅 but enjoy anyway

Warnings: implied sexual content please read at your own risk, its not really detailt but its there so you have been warned

Words : 3067

The doctor had decided to take y/n to a far away planet. He thought that y/n would enjoy it and she did the whole day they looked at old stuff and new stuff buildings, performances she even tried new foods she never had taste before.

"I want to show you one more thing" the doctor took y/n her hand and let the way. after 10 minuts of walking they both came to a big tree and there stood a stone bench against it, it over looked a big valey and the sun was begining to set.

"Its absolutly wonderfull" she looked in awe.

The doctor sat down on the stone bench and patted the side next to him "rest your legs we have been walking the whole day" he smiled.

Y/n sat down "i really enjoyed today, we should do this more often"

the doctor smiled back at her "you are right we really should do this more often"

Both of them looked at the sunset when "meow"

Y/n looked around when she looked next to her there sat a big black cat "oh hi there little one" she smiled, the cat walked up to her and started to rub against her leg (I don't know how the kitlings act im sorry if im wrong) "oh you want to sit with us" the cat meowed in respons. Y/n pated a place in between her and the doctor the cat jumped up on the bench and lay down inbetween them the doctor patted the cat his head without looking down on the animal but he kept his eyes on the horizon. after the sun had gone down y/n and the doctor went back to the TARDIS.

"I'll set the TARDIS back in flight to earth you get some sleep y/n we had a long day and you look tired".

"Alright i will see you in the morning doctor" she said while walking away.

The doctor walked around the console "that cat was mutch bigger than i had seen before on that planet but i have seen it before somewhere els but where?...." the doctor mumbled while pressing buttons and pulling levers.

The next morning they were back at unit y/n was still asleep but the doctor was up And about working on a experiment.

"Good morning doctor" y/n walked out the TARDIS.

"Good morning my dear did you sleep wel? "

"I slept fine i was exhousted yesterday so i fell asleep easy" she smiled while sipping her coffee/tea.

The doctor looked at her "y/n could you hand me that tube next to you"

Y/n did as she was asked and gave it to him, she looked him in the eyes "umm doctor i don't want to be rude but have you looked at yourself in the miror this morning?"

"No i haven't how so is something wrong with my hair?"

"No its not your hair"

"What is it then?"

"Its your eyes doctor they arn't blue they are yellow and they look like cat eyes" y/n handed him her pocket miror

"I see what you mean i have seen it before but i can't quite place it unfortanetly....."

"Do you think its bad?"

"Honestly my dear I have no idea"

*Time skip*

"Doctor?"

"Hmm yes?"

"Are you going with me to eat something? I bet the others are already bussy"

"No i stay here i have to find out whats wrong with my eyes"

"Alright do you want me to bring you anything?"

"Just coffee my dear"

"Alright i'll be back in a hour" y/n closed the door and walked away.

"Now i got to find that book" the doctor said mumbeling to himself while walking in to the TARDIS.

As y/n walked in to the cafetaria she saw jo already eating "hi jo"

"Oh hi y/n how was yesterday?

"It was nice i saw a lot of new stuff we went to a market and we had dinner"

"How Nice i bet the doctor is hanging out in his lab again" jo teased

"Yes he is but thats normal the only strange thing is that the doctor his eyes have changed"

"Oh really? How so?"

"Wel they arn't their usual color they are yellow and look like cat eyes"

"Oh wow thats really weird anything ells difrent than the eyes"

"Not that i have seen its just strange"

"Oh wel i bet its nothig y/n"

"I hope so"

"Tell me y/n Do you like him?"

"Who the doctor?...." *sigh* "is it So obvious?"

"Wel yes it is"

"I don't know jo yes i like him but i don't think he's intrested in me"

"Why would you say that? Have you never seen how he looks at you? And the adventure you two went on looked more like a date than an actual adventure"

"Now you say so"

"But you like him?"

"Yes yes i do" y/n smiled softly

When y/n was done with dinner and talking to jo she went by the office of the brigadier she knoked on the door "come in, ah miss y/l/n hows everything?"

"Everything is going alright im here to pick up my papers that need to be looked trough"

"Ah yes here they are" he placed the pile of papers in her hands "hows the doctor doing?"

"He's bussy tinkering around but something weird is going on"

"Oh do tell"

"Wel his eyes have changed they arn't blue they turned in to yellow cat eyes"

"Hmm i see would you mind keeping an eye on him?" (No Pun intended)

"Dont i always Do that?" She raised an eyebrow while grining

"Yes alright" the brigadier grined back

"Well i got to get back If got to bring him his coffee he asked for" she smiled softly.

"Doctor im back and i brought your coffee" y/n opened the door

"Ah wonderfull thank you dear" he smiled and took the cup from her hands

"Umm doctor your teeth" she handed him her pocket miror again

"Oh no"

"What oh no have you found out what it is yet?"

"Not yet i hope to find it out soon"

"Are you starting to turn in to a big cat?"

"A cat?.... but of course y/n you are a genious"

"What?"

"The cat we pet yesterday i think it had a virus with it"

"Do you know what kind of virus?"

"Im not sure i have seen it before but i can't quite place it where" he rubbed his chin and sat down on the desk

"But i pet that cat as wel so why am i not turning in to one" (I don't know if humans can catch the virus like i said i haven't seen the episode yet)

"I have no Idea dear"

"Oh wel i have to do my work and i got to keep an eye on you Mind if i sit here and sort trough the papers?"

"No not at all go on" the doctor stood up And walked to one of his other desks Y/n sat down on one of the lab tables and sorted trough everything.

About 2 hours later y/n was halfway trough sorting the papers. "Ugh i think i'll stop for today i can't concentrate anymore" y/n stood up "i think i'll call it a day im still tired from yesterday but first im going to take a hot bath"

when y/n left something happend in the doctor his head he went in to the TARDIS to his bedroom he started to gather a lot of blankets and cushions he placed them on the big canopy bed and closed three of the four canopy curtains to create a Nice nest for his future mate. When he was done the doctor went back to the lab and he forgot what he just did.

The next morning y/n woke up late round 10 o clock She changed in a dress and high brown boots because y/n wanted to be comfortable in her outfit for the day she walked to the kitchen to get food "what to to get hmm" she looked in the cupboard after y/n looked trough everything she decided to go with (favorite breakfast) after eating y/n went to read something in the library.

When y/n was done reading she went to the doctor's lab "morning sorry i was late i woke up around 10 and went reading something in the library"

"Thats fine my dear would you mind giving me those cables on the bench over there"

Y/n grabed the cables "here you go" she placed them in his hands "any new developments from the virus doctor?"

"Not yet dear but i know what it is"

"Oh do tell"

"Well its the cheetah virus you can catch it from the cheetah people or the kitlings" he showed a picture of a cheetah person

"But we never came acros people who looked like cheetah's.... wait you said kitlings they look like cats right?"

"Yes big black cats that have Sharp teeth..... but of course!!" The doctor stood up "i told you before that the big cat we pated could be responsible for carying a virus that cat was the kitling i catched it from him"

"Um just curious what kind of symptoms are there?"

"Wel my eyes and teeth..... and well"

"Well? Go on"

He sighed "y/n the thing is that it can bring some events with this and its not for everybody"

"What do you mean?"

"Well cheetah people have mating season round this time of the year"

"Oh.. um" y/n started to blush

The doctor cought and rubbed his neck "Anyway would you mind bringing me some coffee?"

"Oh yes of course" y/n turned to the door to fetch some

About 30 minuts later y/n came back with the coffee "here" she placed the coffee in front of him it was already late in the afternoon

"Thank you y/n" he was about to place the cup to his mouth but then he snifed the air "do you smell that?"

"Smell what?" Y/n sat down at where she sat the day before to sort the papers picking up where she left everything to continue

"But don't you smell that then?"

"Doctor i can't smell anything besides dust, old paper and the smell of coffee" She said while not looking up

"It smells like..." he stood up And walked around while smelling the air and he came stand behind her "oh"

"What oh?"

"Its you" the doctor leaned his nose in crook of here neck while inhaling her scent

"D..doctor pl..please stop" she was schaking

"You are ovulating"

"Wh...What?!"

"I told you that we are in mating season round this time of the year and you will be the perfect mate" he wraped his arms around her and picked her up

"D..Doctor put me down p...please"

"No you are mine" his eyes had turned to even smaller slits than before,

Jo heared y/n yelling from the doctor his lab she bursed trough the door with a tranquilizer gun jo shot the doctor in the back of the neck

The doctor let go of y/n and wipped around "Jo what have you...." he stopped mid sentice and fell to the floor.

"Oh jo thank goodness" y/n stood up shaking

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah yeah im fine"

"What was he doing?!"

"Thats the cheetah virus its taking over him"

"Oh goodness what was he trying to do?"

"He wanted to make me his mate"

"Against your wil?"

"Yeah... I thank you for coming in on time" y/n looked at the doctor "we can't leave him just lying on the floor i think its better we bring him to his bedroom come on" y/n grabed him by the legs and jo grabed him by the shoulders together they brought him to his bedroom.

"Umm y/n?"

"Yes what is it jo?"

"Look" y/n turned around and looked at the doctor his bed it was full with blankets and pillows all made in a round shape on the king sized canopy bed

"What the?, where did he get all of this??? Oh never mind lets lay him down" they placed him on the bed "come one jo we got to leave" y/n locked the door and walked away, jo followed her

"What Are we going to do now?"

"To the library to find a book with tips or how we can stop the proces"

About 30 minuts of searching they still din't find what they were looking For "dear old girl would you mind helping us out?" Y/n looked at the celing she waited for a moment thill she heared something fall

"I got it" said jo "oh look it fell exactly on the page where we were looking For"

"Good now we got to make it i know that there is a medical lab in the TARDIS", The TARDIS had rearanged the rooms so that it was right infront of the library "thanks girl" y/n patted the wall "now lets see"

About an hour later the medication was done "so now we have to give it to him" walking out the door they went back to the doctor his bedroom "when will he wake up?"

"Soon we can't wait long"

"I got to keep him up right" y/n sat behind him

"Alright" jo gave the medications to the doctor "he wil wake up About 15 minuts from now"

"I'll stay here you can go on your way again thank you for helping jo"

"Of course y/n be carefull"

About 15 minuts later the doctor did indeed wake up

"Ugh what happend?"

"Well we had to knock you out because Well lets just say stuff was almost about to happen"

"Did i hurt you? Im sorry if i did"

"Its alright doctor but we could't let that happen not without consent or with force"

"I know im sorry y/n" the doctor hide his face in his head

"Its alright" she hugged him "But Look doctor I know you are infected and to be honest with you i have dreamed about becoming all yours but not like that i want to take it Nice and slow and do it savely and not jump in anything to quick" y/n trailed off looking to the side "i really love you doctor and i hope you love me as wel"

"I love you to and Y/n i swear that if you din't want this i would lock myself up And not come out thill this was over" he rubbed his thumb over her cheek. y/n looked at him with big eyes and she leaned in to kiss him, the doctor returned the kiss

"So do you want this?"

"God yes" y/n said breathless

He kissed her again then he started to undress her taking her dress off first when it was on the floor he looked at her "you look absolutly beautyfull" y/n blushed and looked away, the doctor took her chin and softly forced her to look at him y/n looked him deep in the eyes enchanted by their still yellow color. He undressed her tossing everything to the floor and then he undressed him self doing the same with his clothes.

"Are you still sure you want this?"

"As long as it is safe"

"Look in the Nightstand drawer" Y/n looked in there and grabed a condom she gave it to him "i would never do anything against your will y/n I swear".

"I know that doctor" she wraped her arms around his neck

the doctor put the condom on "if it hurts please let me know" y/n nodded.

The next morning y/n woke up entangeled in the sheets and cushions still completly naked "hmm what happend?" And then she remembered what happend the night before, grabbing the blanket she wraped it around her the doctor wasn't next to her anymore. A few minuts later the doctor walked in dressed in a black dressing gown he had a tray in his hands it was full with breakfast.

"Good morning my dear" he kissed her fourhead and placed the tray on her lap

"Good morning"

"Did you sleep wel? " he asked while he nusseld her

"Yeah i did" she started to eat

"Are you cold?"

"Now you say so Yeah a bit"

The doctor stood up And walked to his closet and pulled out a silver satin dressing gown with fur around the sleeves and the end of the tie. He than walked back to her and placed it on her shoulders "here this should do it"

"Thank you" after y/n was done with her breakfast she placed the tray on the night stand, she layed back down the doctor did so as wel he cuddled up to her she was about to fall back asleep when

"Prrrrrr prrrr"

"Uh doctor are you purring?"

"Oh sorry"

"No its alright don't worry" she smiled softly while running her fingers trough his hair.

They both fell asleep knowing that this would pass and that the doctor will be back to normal in a few weeks.

The end

I hope you enjoyed reading 😊

[molusca]

3, 5, 20, 39 👀

3. rant. just do it

i know that taking life advice from tumblr is a dangerous thing but actually i learned some amazing life lessons here.

one is the importance of a job half done.

i read a post about it once and its something that had such a good impact on my life. because i was raised with such a perfectionism mindset. and that stopped me from doing so many things and made anxious and stressed.

and im talking about things like. cleaning my room or washing the dishes.

theres too many dishes and it feels overwhelming and crushing? wash just a few things. you dont need to wash everything at once. just part of it. the sink will already look so much better if you just do a part of it.

my room is always a mess. it used to be a lot worse tbh. to the point i couldnt walk on the floor bc it was covered in stuff. so cleaning my room was something i almost never did bc it was just so overwhelming. but i dont need to do it all at once. one day i will clean my desk. one day i will fold my clothes. one day i will take the trash out.

doing a job half done is not being lazy like i was raised to believe. its just breaking tasks into smaller tasks. and it makes everything so much more easy.

even with study. sometimes i ignore some stuff, i just go to the test not studying that bc i said “fuck that i dont wanna/its too hard/i cant get this at all” and focus on what i can understand. its not perfect, its half assed but who fucking cares? not being perfect makes me more sane.

and like, whats even so bad about being lazy sometimes? ofc being lazy all the time is bad, everyone who followed me for a week has seen my life falling apart, but being lazy sometimes is actually. just chilling. relaxing. taking a fucking break. i was never told i could do that. no one teached me what was the point i needed to stop bc i was putting my health at risk. and i really put my health at risk more than once, both mentally and physically.

im tired of trying so much to be perfect for others, when no one cared to what was perfect for me.

5. how many accounts do you have?

i have a spare account that i have some urls saved (not gonna make the same mistake twice lol) but i just use this one. i tried to make a pjo sideblog in april but i deleted it a few days ago bc i really cant keep sideblogs kjasgdkasjgdkj

20. describe your blog in 3-5 words

chaotic. dirty. memes. anime. escapism.

39. describe your aesthetic

just like me its a mess. depending of my mood its pastel colors or goth/emo. oh floral stuff too. idk i always have trouble to describe my aesthetic lkjhasdkjashkj

unusual(ish) asks <3

[heanv]

Indie Film Lovers | Yuta

genre: enemy to lovers!au, chefs!au,soft

warnings: none

word count: 1.5k

requested by: @exoczn

song: indie film lovers by lyss & kerri

———————————————————————

You felt overwhelmed by all the stress caused by work and all the customers and the whole staff which most of them generaly suck at doing their one job.Almost no one had any desire to do their job properly and all of that you had to manage all by your own. And tonight was no different.

“Chef, Kim burned all the pork for the phо.What are we supposed to do now?” one of the only sensible employee of yours,Mina complained about her grumpy co-worker Kim Doyoung.

“Tell him to start preparing to finish all the phо by himself and about the meat - tell him to be careful because it may be his last meat he will ever cook in this kitchen.”

“Yes,Chef.”

You were looking at the finished meals,trying to see if there were any mistakes.

“Xiaojun!Come here.Now.”

You could see the fear in his eyes.He was still new in here.

“Did you make these desserts?” you pointed at the beautifully made plates.The boy nodded.

“They look really god and the aroma coming out of them is really rich and mouth-watering and so im sure their taste is great as well. Well done!” you turned to him.

“Thanks,Chef.I really apreciate that.”

“You are welcome,now go back to work” you intructed him.

“Yes,Chef” he bowed and left.

There were tons of people in your restaurant and it was really nerve-wracking to guide a whole staff, half of them them useless and you were just so tired. Lately, the only thing you did was work.Work,work,work. You do not remember the last time you watched a whole film or went somewhere outside the town just to relax.You didn’t even have time to eat properly.

At first the idea of opening your own restaurant seemed like a dream to you and after you did it you did not hesitate for a moment if this is what you really wantedz . Starting off was hard enough but “lucky” for you another new restaurant opened the same time as you opened yours, and it is owned by a particular person you don’t like at all -Nakamoto Yuta.

You both we in the same cooking school and at first you guys got along but as the time passed the rivalry you both prevailed and in the end it turned to hate. So now you two were the biggest competitors in this city. You’ve never been to his restaurant and it’s not like you wanted to but you were always questioning yourself if his cuisine was better than yours or if the restaurant was prettier than yours, and little did you know he was asking himself the same.

After your restaurant by closed for that day, you went home and passed out in your bed,but not for long. You couldn’t sleep due to all the stress and hunger you were experiencing. So you got up and decided to got to the nearby 24h supermarket to eat something. It was nearly 3am. You greeter the cashier and started thinking what to eat when you found in front of dozens of instant ramen. You haven’t eaten these for years. In the cooking academy you had to cook some fancy ramen you couldn’t buy from that kind of stores. Anyways yoy decided to buy some ramen and eat it in the store.You took everything you needed and went to the check out and bought them. As you sat down to eat, someone else entered the store.You couldn’t quite see who it was but it’s not like you cared anyways.

“Well,well have you seen a 5-star restaurant chef eat ramen alone at 3am “ a cocky voice reached out to you.

/I never expected you to come around/

What a nice surprise,Nakamoto Yuta! Brilliant!

“Hello,Yuta.As we can all see you are not so different.” He was holding exactly the same type of ramen plus some other snacks

“Fair enough” he made a place for himself at your table. “Soo?”

“So what?” you spit,not looking at him.

“Whoa,dont be so rude ma’am.”

/But you came in and you swept me off my feet/

“I am not even trying”

“Okay, so i’ll talk first”

“You already did.”

“Damn, you really aint in a mood”

“Yeah,thanks to you” you continue eating your ramen.

“Why are you like this? What did I ever do you?We used to be friends.”

/When we’re together it feels like a movie scene,Like indie film lovers/

Thats true.You really used to be friends with Yuta. You were actually really close friends and you expected after graduating uni you both will continue to be friends with him. You remembered how you to became friends because a teacher peared you both to make french macarons and actually yours macarons were the best of the whole class and after that you two were inseparable - you cooked together , you studied together,hung out together until one day you realised you were in love with him. And since that day you couldn’t face him, you didn’t want to tell him and you just decided to ignore him.So you slowly stopped talking to him and temporary achieved to distance yourself from him.Gradually the friendship turned into just waving to each other which later turned into a rivalry and since then until today nothings has changed.Neither your attitude towards him, nor his ignorance towards you.After you deiced to distance yourself he didn’t what was going on and he couldn’t stop questioning himself and blaming himself that you guys are not friends anymore just by the time he wanted to confess his feelings to you which never happened.

“As you said we “used to” but we are not anymore” you stole a quick glance towards him.

/Let’s go from a to z, tell me what you feel for me/

“Yeah but why? Why are we not friends anymore?What happened ,Y/N?” the look in his eyes was so pure yet so sad and you couldn’t help but blame yourself for his pain because in fact it was your fault.

This is what fear causes - it ruins friendships.You deeply regreted your desicion every single day but it was for the best - at least thats what you thought.

“I dont know Yuta, its already been years, we should forget about it” you looked down,ashamed.

/We’ll color everything,Don’t forget the in between/

“No,Y/n,we shouldn’t.I want us to be friends,at least.”

at least? what is this supposed to mean? what you two could possibly be more than friends...oh. does this mean he had felt the same as you? was this possible?

you took a breath in, a very deep breath. you felt as if you couldnt utter the next few words but if you did, the pressure in your chest that has been there for so long will finally be gone.

/I didn’t know it would be this easy to turn my frown,Upside down/

“Yuta, do you know the reason I stopped talking to you in the uni?”

“No, but I would like to know”

you took a deep breath once again.

“I liked you, like a lot”

dead silence came in. you felt your heart ache and your stomach go crazy.Yuta looked at you with widened eyes.

/Like indie film lovers/

“Are you kidding me? You stopped talking to me because you liked me?! Y/N are you out of your damn mind?!”

/We’ll color everything,It’s only you and me/

you felt bad,really bad. you felt that its finally gonna be over,like you’d tell yuta you liked him he’d laugh, he’d leave and everything would be okay.

silence filled the already heave air again.

“I-i dont know what to say, I am sorry” you mumbled.

/I am little more than a whisper,A cool breeze/

yuta looked at you and his eyes softened.

“Y/n I’ve loved you since the day i met you”

what...the...actual...hell? did he just say that? nakamoto yuta just told you he have loved you for years? freaking nakamoto yuta - the best japanese chef in korea,oh my god.

“w-what?” you barely kept your smile from coming out.

“yes,y/n, i have been trying to tell you for so long and in uni when we were friends i really fell so hard for you and i was so ready to tell you and i couldn’t wait to graduate and to open our very own restaurant, y/n I still love you.”

you felt your ye eyes watering,and your smile taking over your face. you couldn’t describe what you were feeling -it was truly an euphoria.

“I still love you too you know”

“ I hoped so!” he stood up and hugged you tightly.” do you want to start over?”

“yes”

“okay so hey beautiful lady,whose name I definetely do not know.”

“its a pleasure to meet you, you unknown handsome man, my name is y/n y/l/n”

“what a beautiful name! nakamoto yuta is my name,pleasure to meet you too”

you both laughed and looked deeply at each others eyes.

“i like you,yuta,i really do”

“ i like you so much too y/n, you are the one i’ve been waiting for my whole life.”

/I never expected you to come around,I didn’t know it would be this easy to turn my frown,Upside down/

masterlist

[dramaticbanjo]

heres a rewrite of megumi and virgil’s first meeting, hopefully more coherent than the untitled piece before. some things still stayed the same, like virgil using their cape to shield her from the rain, but overall i think im way happier with this version.

also, it has an actual title.

Title: The Edge of Night

as always, megumi belongs to @bace-jeleren 

For those on mobile, i am so, so so sorry.

         Virgil did not need to sleep, but they made camp when it grew dark anyways, setting one of the blessed swords into the ground by its point, the faint glow of magic hanging in the air like fireflies. Armor clinking as they lowered themselves to sit by it, they didn’t turn when they finally spoke.

         “You have followed me for quite some time. State your business.”

Behind them, the brush rustled as their erstwhile follower stepped into the dim light. Virgil’s hand remained on the ground, making no effort to reach for the sword sheathed at their side.

         “Sit by the light. Let me have a look at your face while I decide what to do with you.”

Leaves and twigs crunched underfoot as they did so, taking a seat across from the knight, the sword plunged into the earth between them. All the while, Virgil did not move their head, giving the impression a statue was underneath the burnished armor.

         “Are you lost, child?”

She seemed to curl inward, pulling her knees up to her chest, feet caked with loam, sticks tangled in her dark hair, and wide, bright eyes studying the knight in turn.

         “Uh-huh… I’ve never been here before.”

         “Do you think I know the way?”

         “Well, you looked like you knew where you were going… and I haven’t seen anyone else in this forest…” Her eyes drifted down to the sun emblem on their chest plate, “Are you lost?”

         “I was never going to any place in particular.” A pause. “Are you not afraid of me, child?”

Her gaze went up to their featureless helmet, “…Should I be?”

         “That depends. Do you owe a debt?”

         “No—well, I don’t think so…” Her brow furrowed as she appeared to think it over closely, “…Maybe Mama and Papa did something…”

Suddenly, she shivered, curling even smaller and scooting closer to the sword as if it were the comforting warmth of a fire, “There was a really scary lady—she grabbed me and was really mad at Mama and Papa… she was—she was…” Covering her eyes, she fell quiet, shoulders shaking.

Virgil regarded her, silent and impassive at the young girl across from them.

Finally, they broke the silence, voice measured and calm as it always had been, “If you wish to continue to follow me, then you are free to do so. Do not mistake it for companionship, child. If you fall behind, I will not wait for you.”

Slowly, she lowered her hands, gaze searching, looking for their eyes. Even if she couldn’t find them, she nodded, managing to smile, “Thank you! My name’s Megumi.”

         “Go to sleep, child. I continue moving in the morning.”

          If Virgil was surprised when she awoke as they drew the sword from the ground, they did not show it, letting the weapon disappear in their hand without stopping. She yawned, quickly standing and running to catch up with their longer strides.

Evidently she remembered their words from the night before, and did not complain about the pace, instead yawning more as they followed the knight over roots and down animal trails. Even if it was day, the sunlight was weak, the trees stretching far above them blocking the rays of light, and the branches swayed in the wind, carrying the sounds of unseen animals.

Unbothered by it all, Virgil’s steps only slowed when they were forced to move carefully over overgrown roots and outcroppings of rocks, continuing in a straight line through the wilderness.

It was difficult to tell how much time had passed when they finally stopped by a shallow creek, tilting their head like a bird of prey, focusing on something unseen in the air.

Breathing heavily, Megumi knelt by the water and cupped her hands to bring something to mouth, drinking greedily.

         “You should have some too!” She called to the knight, letting her hands rest in the clear water, “Since you’ve been walking in all of that armor!”

         “I do not need to.” They answered curtly, still looking away, not even casting a glance over, and after another minute, started walking again.

Gulping down another handful of water quickly, Megumi ran after them, trailing just close enough that she could reach out and grab the oddly pristine cape, if she wanted to.

         “How did you get here?” She suddenly asked, the ground leveling out and letting her walk more easily, “Did you get here like me?”

With their back to her, she couldn’t tell if they made any motion that they heard her, so, with a frown on her small face, she tried again.

         “Did you get get here like me? Like did you—did you shut your eyes really hard and everything goes whoosh? And then you open them and you’re in a place you’ve never seen before?”

No answer.

Quickening her steps, Megumi brushed past their cape to walk beside them, looking up at their hidden face.

         “Because that’s what happened to me! The scary lady had me and was gonna’ hurt me but then everything went whoosh and my ears popped and then I was in a new place!”

No answer.

Her frown turned into a pout, and she reached up to grab their cape. With a casual flick of their arm, Virgil easily avoided her grasp.

         “Mama says its rude to ignore people when they ask you a question!”

         “I said this was not an invitation for companionship, child.” Virgil’s voice did not change to show any annoyance, and they did not move faster in an attempt to lose her, but it was a tone that also cut off arguments against it.

Megumi blinked in confusion, “Why not? We’re walking together, why can’t we talk?” When Virgil did not reply again, she let out a small breath.

         “How did you do that with the sword? Like, make it disappear like that?” She jumped over a small depression in the dirt to avoid stepping on a group of growing mushrooms, “Why did you need that one? You’ve already got a sword right there!”

Her voice echoed around the trees, not discouraged by the lack of response from the knight.

         “How did that sword make that light? It was so pretty! Do you have a lot of swords? Why do you need so many of them?”

When the forest around them darkened, she was breathing heavily again, having fallen a step behind but still determinedly following them. Without preamble, Virgil stopped short beside a gnarled and ancient tree, almost making Megumi trip into them.

In one motion that spoke of practice many times before, Virgil drew the same sword out of thin air, the glow of its magic already appearing as it came into being. Collapsing onto the ground, a smile grew across Megumi’s face as she watched the lights in the air, only looking over when Virgil once again plunged the sword into the ground.

The knight took a seat on the ground, and if they were as winded as she was from the trek, she couldn’t hear it or see it.

         “Aren’t you tired?” She asked, stretching her legs out in front of her and leaning back, “Or—oh! Are you like my Papa? Papa’s a vampire!”

         “No, I am not.” Barely a change in their voice and barely a shift in their body to show they were paying attention to her, “Again, child, this was not an offer of companionship.”

         “You can call me by my name, not just ‘child’.” Megumi said with a frown, “…What’s your name? You never said it.”

         “Why should I tell you?”

         “Because I told you mine! It’s polite!”

When Virgil didn’t answer, silence fell over the makeshift camp. Megumi was about to speak, but her words were swallowed up in a yawn.

         “Go to sleep, child. I start moving in the morning.”

          Just as the day before, Virgil awoke without a word, leaving Megumi to hurry after them as they continued walking through the forest, appearing to follow a trail that only they could see.

And just as before, Megumi kept asking questions, attempting to coax an answer, not matter how small, from the knight; from how long they had been walking through the forest to what their favorite color was.

Continuing to mirror the day before, Virgil was silent, only pausing when they passed a creek or a pool, letting Megumi drink while they gauged something unseen.

Night fell, Virgil would set the blessed sword in the ground, ignore more of Megumi’s questions, and bid her good night.

         “Go to sleep, child. I start moving in the morning.”

          Eventually, Megumi ran out of questions she could think of to ask the knight, and she circled back around in her talking to herself.

         “How strong are you?”

         “Why do you ask, child?”

She froze, blinking in wide-eyed surprise at the knight, who had drawn the sword at their side to slice through a thick tangle of thorny vines. Shaking her head to dispel the shock, Megumi carefully stepped in the footprints left by the knight’s larger feet, avoiding the fallen thorns, “Well… you’re covered in armor… and you have that magic sword…”

         “I’m sure you will discover that does not make one special.”

Taking an extra large step to avoid a clump of the cut up plant, she wobbled, almost falling over until she grabbed the long cape, somehow still free of dirt and damage from the forest. Regaining her balance, she jumped over another mess of the vines, one hand keeping a firm grip on the fabric.

         “You’re also all alone—aren’t you scared being all by yourself?”

         “I am not. I have not been scared in a very long time.” Virgil paused in their work, lowering their sword to look back at her, “Is your mind on your pursuer?”

Biting her lip, she nodded, “She was… so scary—I had never seen anyone so angry!”

         “Are you afraid that she might find me, now that you have met me?”

         “I don’t want anyone to get hurt!”

They passed through the thick brush, and Virgil sheathed their sword. Realizing what she had done without thinking, Megumi let go of their cape.

         “I mean, even if—even if you don’t want to talk to me and stuff, I still don’t want you to get hurt.”

Instead of continuing forward, Virgil turned around to face her, properly regarding her for the first time since the first night.

         “…You are very kind to think like that.”

         “Thank you…”

         “What do you want in exchange?”

Taken by surprise again, she blinked once, twice, before managing to stutter an answer, “H-Huh? Want?”

         “Yes. What is it? How much gold?”

         “I-I don’t! There’s nothing! Being kind doesn’t mean I want money!”

At her words, Virgil tilted their head to the side, studying her silently. Finally, they turned from her, facing away once again, and started walking.

         “Come along. I will not wait if you lag behind.”

Jolted out of her confusion, Megumi hurried to do as they said, reaching out with her hand to take ahold of their cape again.

          Underneath an arch made from two trees, Megumi watched curiously as they drew the sword from the air and stabbed it into the ground, making its light fall around them.

         “It is a blessed sword.” This time, Virgil’s voice seemed quieter, more hushed than usual, “The light is a ward it creates to protect from evil.”

Letting out a small sound of amazement, Megumi pulled her legs up to her chest, comfortably resting her chin on her knees, “Is it so you don’t get attacked while you’re sleeping?”

         “I do not like being disturbed, although I do not sleep.” They settled down opposite of her, “You should get some sleep. I start moving again in the morning.”

Even if her eyelids felt heavier, Megumi tried to stay awake long enough to ask one more question.

         “Hey… what’s your name?” The tail end, however, trailed off as she lost the battle against sleep, slumping to the ground in a tight ball as her breathing evened out.

         “My name is Virgil.”

          The forest began to thin, although when the sky suddenly broke open and let loose heavy rains, Megumi almost wished they were still back in the deeper woods so the ceiling of branches would shield them.

Standing on one of the exposed tree roots to avoid setting foot into the deep mud, she watched Virgil pull their hood over their helmet, the drops of rain making a constant, soft patter against their exposed armor.

Without a word, they suddenly stepped closer, holding up one side of their cape with a hand to create a cover for her.

         “Come along. I will not stop if you fall ill from this rain.”

Jumping onto firmer ground beside them, Megumi smiled brightly, “Okay! But what about you? You’re all in armor! Aren’t you worried about getting sick?”

         “I do not get sick. Watch your step, the mud is thick off of the trail.”

Even while they were side by side, Megumi noticed they never came close to stepping on her much smaller bare feet, and hummed cheerfully.

         “We should reach the foothills by tonight, provided the rain does not flood this part of the forest.” Despite the dreary weather or how they were holding up their cape for her, their voice was dry and unaffected, as if they were reading something as uninteresting as a newspaper.

 The foothills led up to a mountain range, but Virgil paid it no mind, leading her to a cave in the rocks to keep them out of the wind and rain. Even so, the blade of the blessed sword easily slid into the rock, filling the small space with its cool light.

This time, Virgil sat next to her, their gaze resting on the sword in the stone floor, letting her wrap their cape around herself like a blanket.

         “Megumi.”

Letting out a squeak of surprise, she grinned, “You said my name!”

         “Indeed. You had asked if I had arrived at the forest in the same manner as you had.”

She nodded.

         “I did. You asked about the blessed sword I summoned; that is my form of magic. As many blades will answer me as I need them.”

Another small nod.

         “You asked me what my name was. I am called Virgil.”

With happiness across her face, and she pulled the cape tighter around herself, “It’s nice to meet you, Virgil! It’s a nice name.”

         “I suppose it is.” They sounded unusually bemused, “You’d best get some sleep, Megumi. I will let you know when it’s time to move again in the morning.”

          It was still raining when she woke up. If anything, it had started raining harder, making small streams of water run off of the rocks, turning the dirt of the forest floor into thick mud.

Virgil had not moved, and Megumi almost thought they had fallen asleep over the course of the night and missed daybreak.

         “Megumi. I have a question for you.” Their voice brought her to wakefulness, and she sat up, swaying slightly as she rubbed the drowsiness from her eyes. They were still facing the sword in the ground, and their words were almost swallowed up by the sound of the rain outside.

         “The one chasing you… You said you were afraid of her?”

Megumi nodded slowly, “I… I never saw anyone so angry. And so angry at other people.” The fury in the steely gaze of the warrior was burned into her memory, a constant reminder of the danger that was following her.

With one hand, Virgil reached down to a hidden piece of their armor and withdrew a knife from its hiding place. It was not ornate by any means, the most detailed part of it being the black sun on its pommel, while the blade was as white as bone, unmarked and untarnished.

They easily flipped it in the air, catching it by the blade and holding the grip out to her.

         “Take this. It is an old friend of mine.”

In contrast to their own stillness, her hands were trembling slightly. Virgil watched as her fingers curled around it.

         “You must only use this once. If she catches you, use it to escape, and then run. Run to as many places as you need to.”

         “Isn’t… isn’t this important to you, if its your old friend?”

         “Its purpose is more so.” Virgil’s larger, armored hands covered hers, “When it is used, I will be able to find it again, no matter how far.”

         “Are you—are you going to fight her? What if you get hurt?”

         “I am very strong. And I am not afraid.” They drew their hands away, leaving her to hold the knife, “Here. My payment for your kindness.”