#if you're wondering if this is about doctor who

[acciotaitlynn]

How about a nurse having a crush on zayne bc his relationship with MC wasnt well known yet and then she found out by busting zayne n mc in heat moment in his office haha

Get well soon!

Hiiii ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ Sorry this took so long! I hope you're doing well! and that you like it ♡♡♡

» mild sexual content, 18+, vsex, oral꒰fem!receiving꒱

shorty; 944 wc

ـــــــــﮩ٨ـ Anya should be paying attention to the heart transplant before her, but she can’t focus on anything except the man performing it. 

Zanye’s bright, golden-green eyes assess the matter before him with his usual stoic expression, movements calm and confident as he asks her for a vascular clamp. 

Luckily, she can respond; she can barely breathe watching him work.

Her mind fills with visions of those slender, experienced fingers tracing her skin, and she trembles slightly as she passes the clamp.

Unsurprisingly, Doctor Zayne occupies the fantasies of many women and men who work alongside him.

He doesn’t notice the longing eyes that follow him like a persistent shadow. But you do.

It’s endearing, really; he has no idea how wonderful he is. 

He must have some idea that their friendliness holds another note, though, after receiving more gift baskets, cakes, and homemade meals than you can count, complete with flirty handwritten notes.

If he does notice, he never mentions it. Justs accepts their gifts with genuine gratitude before sharing them with you.ᵕ̈  

Anya’a attraction ꒰*cough* obsession꒱ is growing unbearable.

The first thing her mind latches onto upon waking and the last before bed, Zayne even lingers in between shifts when her fingers find their place deep inside her; often so worked up from his presence, she’s unable to resist seeking release. 

She’s imagining it, but she thinks the brushes of his fingers are starting to linger, and a look of desire is blooming in his eyes. 

Zayne knows her name, just as he knows most hospital staff. He’s kind and cordial to her, just as with anyone else. But that's it.

This lady has no idea that he's lost in thoughts of you if there’s anything like that in his gaze. 

Take right now, for instance. 

Zayne is washing his hands with a dreamy, faraway look in his eyes, mind swimming with a never-ending replay of your bare, blissed-out form beneath him last night. 

Thoughts of things he wants to try tonight play next as he smiles gently before clearing his throat and shaking himself out of it, failing miserably with a quiet groan, seeing his cock deep inside you seconds later. 

Anya follows him down the half, chirping about how well the surgery went and how incredible Zayne was.    “As always!” 

Zayne is asking when to expect you, and upon receiving your reply of “waiting in your office,” relief courses through him, a pleased smile gracing his features as Anya misinterprets it as a response to her praises. 

She also 100% misreads the desire coursing through him at what he plans to do to you when he gets there. 

He decides he can’t wait until tonight to have you, and he’s practically rushing away with nothing but an apologetic smile while not feeling sorry at all.

How can he when his lips meet yours moments later, and he feels genuinely awake for the first time today? 

Anya is hiding in the bathroom, hand traveling under her scrubs when she has the worst idea of all ideas. 

She checks herself in the mirror, pinching her cheeks and pepping herself up. 

She’s been receiving “signals” for weeks, just too scared to move.

But she’s tired of waiting. If she keeps it up, another of Zayne’s admirers will beat her to it.

Her steps are resolute as she makes her way to his office. With a light knock on the door, her pounding heart stops as she peeks inside. 

Your legs are spread open on his desk, and Anya can see every trace his tongue makes on your clit. 

Every sound of pleasure leaving you both as your hands run tenderly through the raven hair she’s been dying to touch is a stab to the gut. 

Her breath comes quick and quiet as she watches through the crack. 

She recognizes you as Zayne's longtime friend who occasionally visits him at the hospital. She didn’t realize that it was nearly daily; she just didn’t witness it. 

Zayne doesn’t divulge his personal affairs, so your relationship is quiet. His fan club isn’t aware of you—yet.

But best believe they will be soon. 

Zayne’s heated murmur of, “This is unlike me,” before freeing his cock, playing messily before pushing into your warmth, has her thighs pressing together. 

He’s so different with you… So open. So raw and needy. 

He literally whimpers as his hips start moving, and he admits, “You haunted me mercilessly through the entire procedure. If you hadn’t been here, I’d have had to care for myself.” 

You giggle at his words and adorable flustered expression, pulling him in for a lingering kiss.

Your gazes hold far more than a newly blossoming relationship. 

A fierce wave of nausea hits her as she closes the door quietly. 

The resolute plan to tell everyone every little detail forms. But she can’t even think about getting started until her fingers fuck the image of Zayne’s cock filling you up from her mind. 

From now on, no one mistakes Zayne’s daydreamy gazes for anything else, knowing what’s on his mind. 

After a while, he notices the knowing look people give you when you take lunch in the cafeteria or walk along the gardens. And though he likes to keep such matters private, he enjoys people knowing he’s yours now. 

He’s relieved that the suggestive smiles and gifts ease up and that people know where his heart truly lies. 

He pulls you close on the bench, kissing your head with a content smile, unaware of the daggers aiming with deadly precision from a few floors above. 

♡ ya'll better watch out for that one. (¬_¬) like I'm picturing her with our voodoo doll

[blu3-ja3]

What is a mother without violence? Without scorn or ire, hatred or venom? What is a mother who can't protect her young? In nature it's known to never mess with a mother bear when she has cubs, a wolf with her pups, or heifer with her calf. We do not fault a magpie for protecting her nest nor a goose for chasing away children from her nest. For what is a mother without vengeance?

Maevis O'Connor isn't a violent woman, acting first with care and kindness. Even towards the hardest of soldiers on base, always a gentle hand and soft voice. She treats these soldiers, these men who have killed hundreds with precision, with such love. She's forgiving almost to a fault, even when they do the same stupid maneuvers over and over again. Rushing head long into dangerous situations. She forgives them and helps them. So when the 141 has to interact with Graves again after Las Almas they were expecting Doc to be the one holding the peace.

Instead Ghost has to grab the second captain and pull her away. As soon as the man appeared in the intelligence tent she lunged towards him ready to murder, almost grabbing him. But Ghost was quick to react, Roach, Gaz, and Soap were stunned and Captain Price moved to hold O'Connor's shoulder.

"Why the hell is he here?" There's venom in her voice, like she plans to kill the man if she was let go of. She was asking towards Laswell but never once took her eyes from Graves. Even as Laswell explained the same stupid shit to her, because a soldier can't be tried as a war criminal if he was given an order from his superior to do so.

"I was just following my orders Captain, surely you understand?" And Soap is the one to react getting right into the man's face breathing heavily with rage in his eyes "Just give me the order Doc, I'll show him what following orders looks like," but Price puts a hand on his shoulder and pulls him away.

It takes a bit for them to get through the briefing with Laswell, even longer to get into gear and onto the boeing. O'Connor just stares daggers into Graves, even as she holds conversation with Soap about him possibly designing her next tattoo to finish her sleeve.

When the mission progresses she's distant and rude towards him but subtly, if you didn't know better it would seem O'Conner was back to her kind-hearted self, but there was subtlety to her venom. It was more so what she didn't do than what she did do, always checking in with the team by name but never checking in with Graves always forcing him give updates on his own.

The mission goes well, only minor scrapes and the worst is a bruise on Gaz from tumbling down a hill while making their way towards extraction. Doc takes care of everyone but never once moving towards Graves, only tossing him a bandage to cover the cut on his cheek.

"Thanks Doc for all the help! Doing a wonder-," Graves voice drips with sarcasm before he's cut off as O'Connor wheels on him. She's right in his face towering over the man forcing him to look up to her, she's only a few inches shorter than Ghost.

"You can make do with what I give you. You're a big boy so deal with it, unless you want me to give you a proper wound for me to tend to? No? Then handle your shit yourself Graves. And never call me Doc, it's either Doctor O'Connor or Captain O'Connor understood boy." O'Connor is quiet but it's even more quiet around them so everyone can hear O'Conner over the comms.

She sits down next to Roach and goes about checking his cuts and scrapes, cleaning and tending to them with sure care it nearly gives everyone whiplash.

They land and tell Laswell about the details of the operation and what they recovered. They're given to go ahead and are dismissed to go back to home base. As soon as everyone is out of the tent there's a loud crack as Ghost rounds on Graves throwing punch, hard and fast, to the man's face. Three more to his stomach and gut, each punch punctuated by Ghosts voice.

CRACK! "For Las Almas"

CRACK! "For Alejandro and his men"

CRACK! "For shooting Johnny"

CRACK! "For shooting me"

No one moves to stop Ghost nor to grab Graves as he drops to his knees, face already swelling and spit out some blood and possibly a tooth.

"Captain Price I'll meet you at the yard at 0600 for punishment due to insubordination" Ghost rumbles, satisfaction evident in his voice.

"No need, I'm sure cleaning the mess hall and kitchen with the staff will be plenty of punishment enough... Maevis you may want to check on Graves, he might need some assistance." Price said walking away from the tent.

"Eh the bastards fine, just ice it and don't talk for a day. You'll be doing everyone a favor," She smiles and waves her hand walking off with the rest of 141.

Once back on base O'Connor pulled Ghost and Soap into a hug, saying she's proud of them for not putting the man down like a rabid animal despite how much they probably wanted to. Ghost does end up cleaning the mess and kitchen but with Soap's help.

Roach is the one to approach Doc after dinner, she's in her office reorganizing her many pouches and her main pack.

"Captain? You okay? You seemed pretty angry today, don't think we've seen you so pissed. Not even when you were mad at the Lieutenant," he spoke fast and trailing off, like if he didn't say it all at once she'd send him out.

O'Connor turns to the boy, just holding eye contact with him for a minute before speaking, "You are all my boys and I don't like when you get hurt. I especially don't like when that hurt causes you to wake from terrors in the night. And if there's a person who can be blamed for that hurt I will make their life a living hell." She pauses before saying "I'm sorry if I scared you boys I'll do my best to not get that angry again..."

"No need for that Doc, we were just shocked is all ma'am" Gaz says from behind Roach "It's not often we get to see the Bloody part of Bloody Mother Hen," there's a smile and chuckles from the joke.

For what is a Mother without furry towards those who hurt her young?

[roseheartsprincess]

My Riddle Rosehearts dating headcanons!

note: I don't take requests ! :( I just feel like sharing those ahdhdhdjdhdj I love my boy Riddle sm

more under the cut !

— He doesn't like the idea of kissing people without any feelings; Deep inside, he's a hopeless romantic! How could someone do something so pure and loving without really feeling anything for the other? Pfft.

— He didn't really realize he was in love with you, it was just admiration for you, right? Maybe because you follow the rules and are a good student, maybe because you are so confident in yourself and don't depend on rules like he does... Who knows? Poor guy.

— Yeah, Trey definitely notice that between you two. Why would Riddle of all people be so much more nervous and strict about a unbirthday party? What sets it apart from the others? Is it because you're coming?

— After some good amount of time, you're finally dating the red-rose tyrant!

— He's gentle, so gentle that you wonder if he's the same Riddle who was collaring everyone some time ago. He is also your admirer! Although he's not as creepy as Rook tho . . . He loves you so much, he really likes to stare at you for a looooong time. Even though he disguises it by saying that his uniform was untidy.

— Touch starved. He won't cling to your waist and beg for affection, of course not, but he would love some kisses as a reward after studying or something... Can there be cuddles too? · Please give this boy lots of love. He'll love it and take it all.

— He's not a fan of PDA. To be honest, he hates couples making out around him, and he wouldn't want to do the same to you— not in public. He prefers to show his affectionate and cuddly side in private, only you have that privilege, okay?

— Even though, he likes being next to you. You're heading to your dorm on curfew time? He'll be with you to make sure you're all cozy under your blanket. Going to library? He'll go too and study with you. Going to Heartslabyul? Please do. There's someone waiting for you.

— He's such a gentleman! His mother may not have taught him about love, but she sure taught him how to be a truly gentleman. He kisses your knuckles, fixes your hair, takes you places and takes care of you... A sweet boy.

— He sees you in such a pure way; Could NEVER see you as a 'hot body' or anything. That's it.

— He drops everything for you. You call him in the middle of the night? You'll get scolded but he insists on answering you and having your precious sleep interrupted. You're sick and he has studies for an upcoming test? Be ready for a Riddle of two roles: A doctor and a teacher. You're feeling clingy today? He's not so clingy himself, but he'll be glad to be your personal pillow. Kiss and cuddle him all you want.

I'm out of ideas and sleepy. Goodnight.

[americanredragger]

Honestly I've been thinking about Leftist Infighting vs Right Wing Infighting, at least as far as American examples go.

Leftist Infighting did SO MUCH to reduce voter turnout. Leftist Purity Culture did SO MUCH to reduce voter turnout. Yes, Kamala skewed towards a more centrist campaign and YES you definitely need to aim at your fucking target instead of that meadow over there, but Leftism is SO INACCESSIBLE to people who would otherwise be interested in helping the cause. If MAGA is like Doctor Who's Cybermen ("Convert, or be Deleted", and then operating in virtual lockstep at every point from then on with only surface level differences and functionally cosmetic disagreements), then the Left is more like... Daleks. Not in the omnicidal maniac way, it should be said, but in our provable hatred for the Unlike Us. "But I thought inclusiveness was our chief virtue?!" On paper, it is. But we are CONSTANTLY tearing ourselves and others apart for not EXACTLY aligning with our view of what is Good And Pure And Holy And Sacred. We have an OPENLY TRANS CONGRESSWOMAN. That is... not really precedented! Yet people threw her under the bus not twenty minutes later and acted like her election didn't matter and was utterly pointless because she did The Very American Thing and expressed solidarity with Israel rather than Palestine, which, from an objective viewpoint outside the American Internet Left's Echo Chamber, is neither strange nor controversial in America at large, and most of us were brought up this way, so it's unsurprising that many of our generation still think and believe this way. But rather than work around this thing we disagree on, rather than accept an imperfect comrade, rather than table our grievances so we could build a fucking network of resistance against the coming Trumpian Junta, or even open a dialog with her about why she believes what she believes and POSSIBLY try to convince her otherwise, y'all chose the puritan path of least resistance and threw a trans woman to the fucking wolves in an era where trans people are going to very likely rapidly lose fundamental rights. Men are routinely hated on for the simple act of Being Male, as though an expressed XY Chromosome is some sort of Original Sin that automatically damns half the population to Hell instead of a man's actions, and then you wonder why guys like Andrew Tate get such a huge fucking following. NOBODY IS PURE ENOUGH FOR ANYBODY ELSE. We will not accept allies with even the SLIGHTEST fucking flaws because we want to feel morally superior and holy. Well that's how revolutions of every stripe fail: when the revolutionaries are too busy shooting at each other to actually take the fight to an inherently unjust system. A Scottish comedian (pretty sure it's Larry Dean) summed it up well years ago:

"The right doesn't care if you don't hate exactly the way they do, they're just happy you turned up! "Are you pro Trump?" "Yeah I'm pro Trump!" "Are you pro gun?" "Yeah I'm pro gun!" "Are you anti-LGBTQ?" "Yeah I'm antil LGBTQ!" "Are you anti-Muslim?" "Eh, well... no?" "Ah, don't worry about it. You'll get there eventually." Meanwhile the Left is going "Are you anti-Trump?" "Yeah I'm anti-Trump!" "Are you Pro-LGBTQ?" "Yeah I'm pro-LGBTQ!" "Are you pro Universal Healthcare?" "Yeah I'm pro-Universal Healthcare!" "Are you anti-gun?" "Eh, well... no?" "THEN WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCKING SIT WITH THE REST OF THE FUCKING NAZIS WHY DON'T YA?!"

You guys wanna talk collectivism and socialist this and that but the simple fact is that you're utterly unwilling to do one of the most essential parts of any community: accepting that other people are not you and will never be. Just like the Daleks will wipe out whole populations of their own for being a few genes off from what they judge their own current standard of purity is, we do the same to literally anyone who might want to help out but certainly does not share all of our views. And I too have been swept up in this many, MANY times as well because puritanical righteousness feels so. fucking. good. It's a drug we need to learn to kick, and FAST.

Yes, Kamala Harris fundamentally aimed her campaign efforts somewhere other than where her target was, and that was on her. You gotta bring your efforts to where your actual voters and constituents are, obviously. But just as crucially, so many people on the left threw her under the bus for not sharing their views EXACTLY. That played a huge role in costing us the election, and that character flaw will continue to cost us. You can't have a revolution of any kind unless you're willing to work with other people, because if the only Leftist you're willing to work and ally with acts, talks, and believes exactly like you, I guarantee that you'll be working alone.

As much as we talk about how modern Conservative Christians would crucify Jesus a second time if he showed up now, and as correct as that assertion is, so would American Leftists. And I think we need to have a long reckoning with that.

💯💯💯

[beautywithin16]

Kinda feel like a kid on Christmas Eve right now. Except I'll be getting my present at 6:30pm. 😂

[knifearo]

hey dad so when i was ten years old and i told you that i'd gotten tired of romance plotlines in books and you told me that i'd be interested in them when i got older. i just want you to know that i was right

[copper-dragon-in-disguise]

are they in the middle of fucking the time war wreckage again--

oh no they're not, they're in the middle of the cyberman war wreckage

[quietwingsinthesky]

Drabble 166/366 - Doctor Who

Koschei is crying.

Theta is facing away from him in their bed. They don't know what to do.

Every night since the Schism, they've woken up as Koschei is taken away. The same Time Lords come each night, same voices. Theta keeps their head beneath the covers. Koschei returns, crawls into bed, and cries.

Taps at his bedpost.

Theta shivers in their bones at something wrong. They have no words for it.

Someone is hurting him, so they will take him away one day. Across the stars. Where no Time Lords will ever find them.

They listen to him cry.

[harbingerofwhump]

How much less criticism would there be about the Doctor crying/generally being openly emotional this season if he wasn't being played by a Black man

[sharkneto]

did you ever watch fargo? it has similar story beats to true detective, at least, season one (it’s another anthology type series, crime focused) there’s a dude in there who i think you’d get a kick out out of… very much quietly intensely batshit insane and Off™️ but somehow presents himself as the sanest one in the room. he’s rust cohle, in a way, but murderer, not detective

Thanks for the rec! Watched S1 over the past week or so. Was good but it frustrated me. Billy Bob Thornton Serial Killer was the highlight, you were right! He was very fun. What a weirdo.

I don't know if it was that I grew up in an area with accents like theirs so I was like, hyper aware They Are Doing An Accent, or that it was based on Coen Brother's work, but a lot of the characters felt... rather like caricatures? I don't know, something about it had a wall between me and it, where I wasn't immersed so they felt like We Are Actors On A Set Delivering Lines Really Well rather than I was in the moment, if that makes any sense. Maybe it was the monologues, Flannigan series can have the same affect to me.

Still, was a really good cast. I needed Martin Freeman to get his comeuppence like three episodes sooner, my god that man could just wiggle out of everything (SPOILER he sent his wife to get shot???? what the fuck is wrong with him. I was screaming SPOILER OVER). I always like it when Colin Hanks pops up in things. Allison Tolman and Billy Bob Thornton fucking carried the whole thing, they were the only two I didn't really get the I Am Delivering Lines With Emotion And This Thick Minnesotan Accent feeling.

Writing was generally tight, too. Good full circle moments and Chekov's guns, pieces came together in satisfying ways. Was fun to be rooting for Molly to catch her killers and for Billy Bob to fucking get Martin Freeman. I think it could have been one episode shorter, or skipped the time jump, to give the police a modicum more competence, they were killing me.

Idk if I'll watch the other seasons, I did enjoy it overall. Might check out the newest one because I'm a slut for Jon Hamm.

[truebluewhocanoe]

I saw someone in the comments of my Tales of the TARDIS uploads bitching about how every companion ends up in a position of authority so here's me going through every televised companion, what occupation they ended up with after leaving the Doctor, and then analyzing whether there is an uncalled for number of authority positions in the list. As this is televised companions only I will be prioritizing the canon of televised stories. Here we go:

Ian Chesterton: Professor at the University of Cambridge (Death of the Doctor)

Barbara Wright: Professor at the University of Cambridge (Death of the Doctor)

Susan Foreman: Member of the Earth Council world government (Audio: An Earthly Child), though this is contradicted by some other stories

Vicki Pallister: Farmer (Tales of the TARDIS)

Steven Taylor: King (Tales of the TARDIS)

Katarina: N/A

Sara Kingdom: N/A

Polly Wright: Co-running an orphanage (Death of the Doctor)

Ben Jackson: Co-running an orphanage (Death of the Doctor)

Jamie McCrimmon: There are way too many sources for him and none of them definitive; the Tales of the TARDIS episode he appears in does not confirm what he got up to, but does decanonize certain other sources such as The World Shapers

Victoria Waterfield: Head of New World University (Some home video called Downtime?)

Zoe Heriot: President, presumably of Earth (Tales of the TARDIS)

Liz Shaw: Multiple contradicting sources: includes but not limited to doing scientific research, teaching as a professor, or running P.R.o.B.e. (don't ask me what that is, I'm not deep enough down the rabbit hole yet)

Jo Grant: Climate activist (Death of the Doctor, multiple other sources)

Sarah Jane Smith: Reporter, defender of Earth (School Reunion, all of The Sarah Jane Adventures)

Harry Sullivan: This man's EU canon is a mess but we know at the very least that he stayed with UNIT for a while as a scientist (The Zygon Invasion)

Leela: Bodyguard (Gallifrey audios)

Romana: President of Gallifrey (Gallifrey audios)

Adric: N/A

Nyssa: Scientist/medical researcher on Termius (Terminus, multiple other audios), but she eventually returned to Earth, occupation unknown (Tales of the TARDIS)

Tegan: Airline attendant (multiple EU sources), later activist (Power of the Doctor)

Turlough: Astrophysicist (Turlough and the Earthlink Dilemma)

Kamelion: N/A

Peri: Canonically multiple endings including brain death, talk show host, botanist, Queen of Krontep, married to Yrcanos in multiple different arrangements ranging from happily to unhappily (Mindwarp, Peri and the Piscon Paradox, Tales of the TARDIS, lots of other audios and books too, sheesh)

Mel: Unknown (multiple EU endings have been decanonized by Power of the Doctor)

Ace: CEO of A Charitable Earth (Death of the Doctor, At Childhood's End, Power of the Doctor)

Grace: Copyright hell

Chang Lee: Copyright hell

Rose Tyler: Marital bliss (Journey's End)

Mickey Smith: UNIT Agent (End of Time)

Martha Jones: UNIT Agent (End of Time)

Donna Noble: I'm posting this a week before the first of the 60th Anniversary Specials, so... TBD?

Amy Pond: Novelist (Angels Take Manhattan, The Bells of Saint John)

Rory Pond Williams: Not 100% determined but presumably nurse (Angels Take Manhattan, misc. EU sources)

Clara Oswald: Traveling the universe with her immortal girlfriend, also technically N/A (Hell Bent, Twice Upon A Time)

Bill Potts: See prior entry, crazy how that happened twice, huh (Twice Upon A Time)

Nardole: Implied to have ended up a farmer (The Doctor Falls, Twice Upon A Time)

Yasmin Khan: Presumably still a cop, unfortunately (Power of the Doctor)

Ryan Sinclair: Unknown, too recent, implied to have been studying to be a mechanic (Revolution of the Daleks)

Graham O'Brien: Presumably still a bus driver, also head of the companions group that never got an official name but we all agreed to call it Companions Anonymous (Power of the Doctor)

Dan Lewis: Presumably still unemployed and volunteering (Power of the Doctor)

Okay. Phew. That's all of them.

So, that's 41, not including K9 (there's too many K9s running around, sorry, also he's a robot dog.) Let's cut Katarina and Sara Kingdom, who I only really included to flex. That's 39. Okay, now let's cut Adric and Kamelion, who died before they could have a post-TARDIS career, as well as Grace and Chang Lee because c'mon, you need to actually travel in the TARDIS before you can have a post-TARDIS career. Now we're down to 35 companions.

Companions in a position of high authority, not just an expert in their field or whatever but with governmental authority are: Susan (choosing the specific EU canon where she's on the Earth Council), Steven, Zoe, Romana, Peri, and... oh wait, that's it! Just those five! And three of them are from sources that aren't the main show episodes! Considering that fiction usually follows interesting people rather than the average person, and both the Doctor and the TARDIS are picky about who they let on board, I'd say that 5/35 is a perfectly reasonable figure. Some people just want to complain.

[capybaraonabicycle]

Impossible Women

A theory or headcanon or call it a fic if you want - about what happened to the astronaut of Lake Silencio after the deed was done (yes, this is angsty; you were warned in the subtitle)

Halfway back into the lake River realises that the suit is about to shut down. It takes a while to grasp the full meaning of that as she is quite shaken up - having just shot the Doctor who is suddenly also her husband now in an alternative timeline because she broke time and maybe he isn't dead but who knows if that is actually true or she is halluzinating by now and she really needs a long sleep and time to think this all over - but then she realises that a) a shut down suit means her air will run out BUT b) it also means she will be able to move of her own accord again BUT c) the heavy suit will keep her at the bottom of the lake rendered useless and she has to get out asap if she wants to survive.

So she does just that, forces herself out of the suit by pure unbending Pond-Williams-willpower like she did as a child, uses her respiratory bypass to not choke in the meantime and swims up to the surface. She looks back to see whether older-her will shoot at her again but everybody on shore is too busy mourning the Doctor to notice her. She knows it will not stay that way. They will hunt her - whoever 'they' are, be it the Silence, the time agents, or the Judoon - sooner rather than later. She has just killed the Doctor, at least that is what the universe has to believe. She cannot go back to Luna, they would imprison her immediately. She can't go anywhere. And yes, she realises that she probably has to go to prison to completely sell the lie, to save her Doctor. But by hell will she not go willingly. She will run, as far and as fast as she can.

She sets out to swim to shore and start on the running, when out of nowhere a hand appears, almost punching her in the face. It belongs to a young, brunette woman with impossibly large eyes and is reached out as if to help her.

"Grab on" the woman whispers and River does what any confused, sapphic woman would do in this situation: she takes the hand. As soon as she does, the background behind the woman wobbles and twists like a curtain is pulled back and then River can see a diner swimming on the lake, the woman kneeling in the entrance door.

"This will not be huge on dignity" the woman warns, attempting to pull River into the diner.

River, however, has gathered herself enough by now to wave her off and tell her to stay back. Then she heaves herself into the diner - rather gracefully if she says so herself. The other woman seems impressed and River lets her know it'll take more than some kidnapping, manipulating, time breaking and loss of her husband to render her incapable of handling herself and that she feels she is still more than able to defeat the other woman and any of her associates should they have come to take her to prison.

"We're friends of the Doctor's" the woman reassures her. "We know him in the future. I am Clara. Come along, I will introduce you to Ash."

The diner turns out to be a TARDIS and Ash - or Ashildr - turns out to be a rubbish pilot. The Doctor is nowhere to be seen but River understood on entering that this was not their TARDIS, so she didn't really expect him to.

"Where is the Doctor?" she asks once she has taken over from Ashildr and is flying them into the time vortex.

"We don't travel with him anymore" Clara says. She is eyeing River's maneuvers critically but doesn't complain. "But we knew him after his time with you."

"So he does have a future" River murmurs, hoping the two others don't notice her small sigh of relief.

"He does" Clara agrees. "You didn't shoot him back there. Only the teselecta."

River doesn't understand what they want from her then, why they have come for her. When she voices that, Clara smiles brightly.

"We just wanted to offer you a lift" she explains. "And ask you to stay with us. They will be looking for you all over the universe, in all time zones. You just killed the Doctor. Everyone everywhere and everywhen will be hunting for you. If you want to run, a TARDIS might come in handy."

"And nevertheless you want me on your team?" River asks, incredulous. Clara nods vigorously but Ashildr doesn't seem that taken with River. She is very quiet, keeping to the back. It seems like she is going along with this only for Clara's sake.

"As I said, we are friends of the Doctor's" Clara repeats. "And you're his wife. Of course we want to help you out. What do you say?"

River would never pass on the opportunity to travel in her own TARDIS with two badass women and she tells them so. The fact that she has no other place to go, either, hangs between them unspoken.

River enjoys travelling with Clara and Ashildr immediately. She does not like them at first but it is convenient and it is fun and definitely better than rotting away in prison.

She does not like Ashildr because Ashildr doesn't like anyone herself - except for Clara perhaps and she likes to show that. That makes it difficult to get closer to her. River doesn't mind, they can live together just as well without caring for another.

She does not like Clara because that woman is positively insane and annoyingly righteous in spite of it. It takes her about a day to understand that Clara is not the goody two-shoes bubbly princess she tries to present herself as and a few more to understand just how unhinged the woman is. And yet she has that annoying entitlement of a 'good person' complete with the stubborn insistence on telling people River has threatened with a gruesome deaths that River 'didn't mean it that way'. As if you would pronounce death threats to strangers without meaning them.

Clara is a very good kisser, though and River has to admit it is intriguing to see what madness she will come up with next. She assumes the feeling is mutual. They bicker and they fight and they aggressively make out after and about a month in, River is head over heels for her. She assumes that feeling is mutual as well.

What is surprising is how much Clara wants to talk about the Doctor, how often she asks her about him. Not just about their relationship or their time together. Even things as banal as how he performs certain mannerisms or how he takes his tea intrigue her. And she speaks of him solely in the past. It is almost as if she is talking about a fictional being, a mystical creature. As if she didn't know him at all. Sometimes River wonders whether they told her the truth and are really friends with the Doctor or whether this is some kind of weird, pointless charade.

"Do you want to know why she always asks about the Doctor?" Ashildr appears one night in her door, alone, wearing that same, just slightly detached expression she often sports. When River confirms, she leads her away to a room deep in the TARDIS.

It is a study, filled to the brim with manuscripts and paintings and drawings - many of the Doctor. It doesn't look much different to her office at Luna.

"This is her memory" Ashildr answers to River's silent question. "I used to have one, too, myself, at least I think I did. I can't be too certain."

"I don't understand" River admits.

"Clara is well over 200 now" Ashildr explains. "And I don't even know how old I am."

"Well, you're looking good" River tries to lighten the mood but of course it fails.

"Spare me the flirting" Ashildr huffs. "We are immortal but we have human brains. In Clara's case a dead human brain. We can't retain memory forever."

"So she tries to put it all down" River understands, running her hand over a painting of the Doctor. There is another man on the canvas next to him, older, gray curls, impressive eyebrows. She briefly wonders if he was another companion, she thinks she sees him on several of the drawings, too. "Catalogue him, study him. So she won't forget."

"You know why we picked you up that day?" Ashildr asks and River takes the question as silent confirmation. "We went to one of your tutorials for Professor Summerfield's lecture on the Doctor. When Clara found out such a study existed she immediately wanted to go. We snuck in, sat in the back. I think Clara just wanted to test her memory and find out mistakes in your approach. Feel like she still knew him better. Only halfway through she realised who you were."

River raises an eyebrow.

"Of course she knew you" Ashildr explains. "She met you, actually, there is a whole volume on you somewhere on that shelf over there. To be honest she is giving your hair too much credit in it, it is not that impressive."

"Must be in my future" River murmurs. "I don't remember meeting her before. Or you."

"Well, she didn't remember you either, had completely forgotten about you" Ashildr shrugs. "But when we were back in the TARDIS she pulled out that book and then we did some research. Found out the best possibility to pick you out of your time stream. So here we are."

"Clara sneakily employed me as a teacher on the Doctor under the guise of helping me escape?" River summarises with an incredulous laugh. "The audacity!"

"Only it won't work" Ashildr says. "Not in the long run. She can repeat the memories as much as she wants, that just hollows them out. And one day she will realise that she doesn't remember the important part. How exactly his voice sounded, the exact way he smiled. She will have a bunch of cold images and empty data and borrowed stories from you. Without new memories the old ones just fade. Trust me. I know what I am talking about."

River is tempted to say she is sorry but she knows better and bites her tongue.

"And the moment she realises that" Ashildr heaves a sigh and River is surprised by the display of emotion, "she will go back to Gallifrey and reinsert herself into her timeline. Clara will not risk forgetting the Doctor competely - she has fought too hard and she is too stubborn and she loves him too much to let that happen."

She looks onto the canvas with the grey haired man, her mouth a bitter line. "The universe gave me someone I could bear eternity with and she won't stay with me."

"I know this doesn't sounds very helpful right now" River starts slowly. "But I do know another immortal. His name is Jack -"

"- Harkness, I know" Ashildr chuckles. "You cross him eventually when you live through all of human history. I think we spent some time together, too, I can't quite remember. I guess we didn't work out finally or maybe he wasn't that immortal after all. He didn't make it until the end of the universe with Me at least. Don't know whether I want to repeat that."

"I have got a plan, though. For when Clara goes back to the trap street" Ashildr says after a while. "I am not immortal, not really. I could be killed."

River cocks her head. "Are you asking me to kill you?"

"Would you do it?"

River tries to put as much warmth into the words and her smile as she can. "Of course."

"Good." Ashildr looks around the room. "I should get you away from here, now."

"I suppose, I can't read any of this" River says reluctantly. It is tempting, to see for herself in the memories of another woman that the Doctor really is okay, that he lives on. But she knows she mustn't. Spoilers.

"It was inevitable from the beginning" Ashildr says in the hallway. "Clara and Me. How we would end up. And I knew that. But I am glad we did it. The travelling. The running. Going the long way round. And I am glad we picked you up. Kind of like one last pit stop on the way."

It should offend River to be described that way but she can't bring herself to mind. Maybe Ashildr is right. Maybe there is a time to stop running, to stop resisting, after all. Even for herself. Maybe not just yet, but eventually.

There is a prison cell waiting for her.

[britneyshakespeare]

Funny. I was thinking just yesterday about how it had been awhile (almost a year) since I had a good old fashioned fainting spell. And the last time I had one I didn't even think I was dying like a lot of other times I've had them in the past. Well then last night (tonight? Today?) between 2 and 3 in the morning I went to the bathroom, washed my hands, was thinking "man this feels like so much effort I'm so tired" when I turned around to dry them, and then I realized I was on the floor somehow in the fight of my life with the perception of consciousness again.

[icewindandboringhorror]

Daily Log 5

Trying out (probably just temporarily) making short daily-ish notes about things, in an attempt to see if it helps me be more reflective or productive lol.

Activities: Not much, I had to run errands most of the day and also felt incredibly tired, probably because the cats woke me up like 4 times last night begging for food and things. Overly warm and headachey a lot.

I planted a few new flowers, and pressed more flowers and clovers in my Large Sturdy Flower Pressing Book as well.

Actually worked on translating the text for the previously mentioned tapestry/painting thing. I think I've decided that it doesn't really matter very much, because nobody else even knows anything about this conlang except for me, so they won't know if it's wrong lol.. It is not entirely completed after all (complete enough to translate most simple sentences into consistently, but also there are a few spots here and there where I haven't fully worked out the way some part of speech actually functions or etc., or I wrote down one thing that later contradicts something else, so occasionally I reach a sentence that I'm not sure exactly which rule to follow to translate, and I need to do a larger comprehensive organization of the document to work out all the kinks and declare officially like 'THIS is the ONE way this is done' etc. etc.) - so because of that, I think I'll just kind of 'do my best' and if the rules now end up changing in the future as I further work on the language, then, that's fine, because nobody can read it anyway lol. Kind of like that song on my side music youtube that's sung in genuine Avirrekava lyrics but also I wrote them years ago and some of the sentences have now become outdated/invalid.

Washed and cleaned some kale so it will be dry for me to maybe make silly kale chips tomorrow.

Final proofreading + posting of the poll adventure thing.

eughh,, literally nothing else.. I hate running errands because it always makes me feel drained and sick after, plus I get nothing else done all day except for just going places. I know checking my p.o. box and picking up cat food and stuff is technically still a productive action, but it just feels like.. i should be getting all of my long term projects done instead lol.. what about the videos?? or worldbuilding?? what does grocery shopping have to do with elves??!?! >:V (aside from pretending to be a group of fantasy creatures evaluating produce having an imaginary conversation with yourself at the store ghghj,, but that is not productive either lol)

Notable sights: Found 13 four leaf clovers, and 2 five leaf clovers, though one of them is almost a 6 leaf (like one of the leaves is nearly split all the way into a sort of heart shape, just not entirely). Also two of the clovers are HUGE, probably the biggest 4 leaf clovers I've ever collected, like 2 inches across maybe. The sky was very pretty a lot with big fluffy white clouds. Not a 'sight' really, but I got to sit in air conditioning for a little while today and it was very nice. I love the cold crisp kind of stale air smell, like walking into a freezer or something (which I used to do when I was a kid, I would sneak into a walk-in freezer at a school cafeteria and just sit there for a while lol), it's comforting to me.

Goals moving forward: Consistent sleep schedule. Focus on social activities, finding new friends in the places I want to move, communicating with ones I have. Physical therapy exercises. Plant nasturtiums. Finish and upload videos, edit costume pictures & etc. Do the new costumes I've planned. MAKE SCULPTURES at some point, I miss them.

Notable foods: Had a bit of smoked gouda and green onions in my Mandated Completely Plain Flavorless Grits For Breakfast this morning, as a littol treat lol.. Tried a 'biscoff' ice cream bar, which is generally a flavor profile I like, but I think I would usually rather be eating a cookie than having ice cream. Also an Ensure nutritional drink, which I know most people consider gross but I genuinely like them.. maybe it's like a source of comfort when my stomach is too sick to eat, like 'oh well at least I can have this cold smooth textured chalky chocolate thing' lol.

Sort of like how I have positive conditioning to feel safe/comfortable in bathrooms (due to it usually being one of the only places you can safely retreat from a social situation or get out of crowds in public areas, etc.), even though rationally I have no particular reason to like bathrooms much, and most people dislike public bathrooms especially. Fellow public bathroom and ensure nutritional shake lovers unite! (3 of us in the entire world)

[masterlysamtyler]

// Itty little PSA-ish post about the Master’s appearance on this blog;

The Master is a villain. He would kill your muse without hesitation and he absolutely could kill your muse as well.

That’s why any muse who the Master does not personally care about, is given thick fucking plot-armour. We’re all here to enjoy a good story, so obviously I won’t ever kill anyone’s muse off. Don’t worry. But please, please, please don’t be a dick and push my muse unnecessarily. That’s just no fun to put up with, yk?

Thanks a lot in advance everyone! 

K. Love you. Byeee ♥

[fuckyeahgoodomens]

David Tennant interview at the British LGBT Awards, June 2024 (x)

Int: You being an ally to the community isn't something new. You've been doing it, but recently you've obviously really stepped up for trans and non-binary people in a time that's so, so needed. What made you do that?

David: I don't know that I feel like I've done anything that I wouldn't just sort of be normally doing. I mean, it's for me it's just common sense that there's there should be any suggestion that people aren't allowed to live the life they want to live and and to be who they want to be with and to express themselves wholeheartedly. I mean, as long as you aren't hurting anybody else, everybody else just needs to fucking butt out. I don't really understand why...

Int: ...it's controversial.

David: Yeah, there is and the thing... the thing, if there's something that's particularly sobering and depressing, it's that certain debates are being weaponized by certain elements of the political class, often for no... it seems it's not ideological so much as opportunistic. And I just think that's pretty disgusting, really.

Int: I couldn't agree more. What message would you like to send out to trans youth?

David: Please don't feel like you're not loved and that you're not accepted and that you're not... you know, most people in the world are good and kind and just want you to be able to be who you are. Most people in the world don't really care. I mean... you know what I mean?

Int: We're all narcissistic.

David: Exactly. Everyone's so self obsessed that really, the sort of noise that comes from a certain area of the press and of the political class is... it's a minority. It really is. And please don't let that make you feel diminished or dissuaded or discouraged, because, you know, you just... you have to be allowed to be yourself, and you are, and you are yourself and you must thrive and flourish, and we're all here for it.

Int: Amazing. I think, yeah, it's so important .I think sometimes it feels like there's so many people, but it is a minority. It's such a minority.

David: It's a tiny bunch of little whinging fuckers that are on the wrong side of history and they'll all go away soon.

Int: Like what happened with gay people 20 years ago.

David: When I was a kid, when I was a kid, exactly. You know, I was at school when Clause 28 came in and it all felt like being gay was something to be terrified of. And gay men in particular were demonised as paedophiles and now that just feels historic and ludicrous and, I mean, I don't see all those... all those battles aren't won, but we're in a very, very different place. And I feel like.I feel like history is on a progressive trajectory and it might get knocked sideways now and again by people for all sorts of reasons, which are often quite selfish and quite, as I say, not coming from a place of any sort of genuine belief system, but other than a place of opportunism. And that's something that we... I hope that in 20 years time, we're talking about, you know, these culture wars as something of the past.

Int: I believe we will. I'm a huge Doctor Who fan, so.

David: Oh, good, me too!

Int: You are my Doctor.

David: Oh, thank you very much.

Int: But recently, obviously, you came back for the 60th anniversary and you got to work with Yasmin Finney.

David: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Int: What was it like working with her?

David: Oh, she's brilliant. She's fantastic. Yeah. And she's in the show again now, she's back in it, so that's fantastic to see. She's lovely, talented, cool as a cucumber, articulate, brilliant. I learned a lot from her as an actor and also as someone who, you know, who's become a sort of de facto activist just because of who she is and where she is, and she becomes a sort of symbol of hope, and she's wonderful.