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hi! im so incredibly sorry to bother you but i think you may have blocked one of my other blogs and i was wondering if i could ask why?
please don’t feel pressured to answer whatsoever and definitely feel free to ignore this, i really don’t want to trouble you in any way. i just wanted to know if i did anything wrong or something to offend you?
i really try my hardest to stay neutral and friendly as well as respecting and following everyone else’s blog rules so i’d really appreciate any feedback or insight if you’re happy to give it. whatever i did, once again, im so incredibly sorry to bother you, i don’t mean any harm at all, ever. if i did something to offend you, it was never intentional, all i really try to do on tumblr is rb pictures of cats most of the time anyways.
please don’t take this the wrong way, it just makes me super anxious that i might’ve done something to someone that may have hurt them or made them uncomfortable. i really loved your writing and your blog and i can’t apologise enough if i messed up or anything. of course, i totally understand that sometimes people just choose to block people for their own reasons and i respect that no matter what. i’m incredibly sorry if i encroached on your boundaries in any way, i just really held your writing close to my heart and it saddens me that i can’t view it anymore. but that isn’t your fault whatsoever. i respect you so much as a writer and a person and i just wanted to say that i’m really sorry if i did anything. i’m sorry tee.
okay bestie i can’t rly tell unless u share ur url tho 😭 but honestly sometimes ppl leave comments or tags that make me feel weird / annoy me — i’m human and sometimes i block over petty reasons (i’m working on it fjsjfj) but overall i like to think i block with decent cause so unless ur ageless, you’ve probably said something to slightly (or perhaps highly) irritate me or you may have spam liked ?? idrk unless i see ur url tbh. i mean if u send me ur url i won’t post it and if i can’t recall why ur blocked i might as well unblock (as long as ur age is present)
anyway if i block u i’m not saying everyone should come swarm me with “can i ask why” bc that would be annoying but sometimes writers are human and sometimes we block for dumb reasons and if you think perhaps you haven’t rly done anything worth blocking besides maybe me taking out a bad mood on a slightly accidentally annoying thing u did, i might just unblock if ur url doesn’t ring a bell in my mind for something memorably obnoxious. especially if u think it’s bc u didn’t have an age in ur bio before—some of u don’t know to do that till after and i get that !!—im happy to unblock if you’ve since then added an age. but again this isn’t an open invitation for all blocked blogs (id assume ur lurking if ur blocked and reading this LMAO) to come ask me why or for an unblock but sometimes if u rly believe you’ve been blocked by mistake or for a petty reason i’m willing to check is all i’ll say
anyway yeah if u see this send ur url—be mindful of any comments or tags u leave, sometimes u might be unintentionally a bit rude and that could be a big reason why !! also don’t spam like i rly rly hate that
edit: i appreciate the kind comments about my writing NFJSJF i thought i’d add that in bc ofc sharing writing is the main reason im here and hearing u enjoy it and such is nice to know. thank u for reading and thinking highly of it that’s rly sweet <3
#asks!#i haven’t rly blocked anyone lately unless they’re ageless or minors recently#other than that#i think there’s been like 2 ?? ppl in the last few days and it was over slightly rude comments under the posts / tags#if you’ve left any comments / tags that u recall#it may have been over those#in that case i am willing to lyk why i didn’t appreciate them and unblock#just bc idk i think i’ve been a bit pissy the last few days LMAO
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Blood Bound: Blackened Bond (Ch 15)
Warnings: Action, Coarse Language, Fighting, Descriptions of Blood
Previous Chapter: Big White Lies
Next Chapter: 土御門天皇 (Tsuchimikado)
Tags: Kamo Noritoshi x Reader, Soulmates AU, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Fem!Reader
Taglist: @lessie-oxj @rizzo-nero @whoreuc @fkngkumiko @isl3t @gojoussunglasses @onepotatostand-blog @s-t-f-u-b-i-t-c-h @sunaswife @lordguameow @track5enthusiast
Notes: If you want to be tagged for every update, and specify if you're okay with NSFW posts or not, please mention it in the comments below ty ❤
Chapter 15: Shadows Fall
You numbly sat down on your bed. The room was dark. Your Phoenix brand, silent, a dull sepia stain on your inner wrist.
It hurts a lot.
“He’s no different to the power hungry elders of this corrupt society after all huh.” You were disappointed. It was dumb of you to give your heart away to him. Especially to a man who was already planning on taking in concubines, this early into your “relationship”.
You checked your phone to see the notifications. Mai and Miwa were looking for you, saying that you have dinner out with them in a few minutes.
'Ah, that was supposed to be for tonight' you thought.
"Sorry can't go, feeling unwell. You guys go ahead." You texted back to them as you slumped on your bed.
After a few minutes your door slammed open. "Where have you been?!" Mai asked, but stopped talking upon seeing your red rimmed eyes. Miwa peeked out behind her. "Are you okay y/n?" She asked.
That question absolutely crushed you. You started sobbing again, not being able to hide your shaking shoulders. The two girls filed in and closed your door.
"We are ordering take out. Miwa go ahead and cancel that reservation. We will stay in tonight." Mai said. "Right!" Miwa worriedly replied as she pulled out her phone and made the call.
"I'm not here to baby you. You will tell me what happened, okay?" Mai demanded.
"I need a few minutes" everything looked so blurry through your tears, Mai and Miwa only looked like unfocused blobs of dark green and bright blue. Literally, the only way you could distinguish the two girls at this point was by their hair color.
They couldn't get much out of you other than you talking about how Kamo-san never liked you in the first place and how you pushed yourself onto him.
The girls held you as you cried. They couldn't believe what they were hearing. "But both of you looked great. I'm sure Kamo senpai really liked you though?" Miwa questioned out loud.
Mai just nodded her head. "I said it before already. Both of you act like you're so oblivious to each other's affections. But I do agree that you put more effort into the relationship. He always turns down your request for dates off campus. Even an outsider could see that."
"No, no it’s not that. You guys know how the big 3 clans operate. He just felt that I was a suitable wife to bear his heirs. They're jumping at the chance to use me to get a blood-manipulator jujutsu shi who may also possibly inherit my psychokinesis technique. I don't want to stay in a relationship without any love in it." You whispered.
Your voice was all gone after you sobbed for hours. The fight and energy just drained out of your body.
They couldn't say anything to that as it was your relationship with Kamo and not theirs. That night, they slept over in your room, the three of you squishing into your queen sized bed and plushies.
◇◇◇
On the other hand, Noritoshi had woken up from his nap, bedhead and red rimmed eyes and all. Clearly remembering all your painful words. He looked over to the side, staring at the Jade dragon pendant atop his bedside table. A small pink letter resting beside it, one that you had given him days prior.
‘Dearest Toshi,
You must be exhausted from all of your extra tasks given to you by your clan as of the late. I hope that it gets better soon, I’m here if ever you want to talk about it or if you need any help with that. My family and I are open to supporting you in your endeavors, though you haven't met them yet. Hiroki nii is especially excited to meet you, I can already see the both of you getting along quite well. Whenever you’re ready <3
Have a good evening.
Love, Y/N.’
He felt tears burn behind his eyelids.
“It was too sudden, I couldn’t even understand half the things she said to me earlier,” he murmured to himself. He racked his brain, trying to recall the things you said. It was mostly a blur to him.
Something about what he and his father talked about yesterday. That wasn’t an issue, it was mostly clan duties as per usual.
Also, how he never liked you. Well, he hasn’t confessed yet, but he couldn’t see why you’d bring that up out of nowhere when everything was still fine 2 days ago.
Concubines. The talk on concubines. Why did you- Oh. “... from yesterday” Noritoshi’s head was getting clearer and clearer. You must have misunderstood the conversation he had with his father, and left before it finished. It didn’t sound pretty now that he thought of it.
He had that single-minded goal of pleasing his father and the elders, but somehow you got tangled in the mess.
He sighed frustratedly. It always seemed to be the case with you jumping conclusions about him, didn’t it? Now he has to clear it up with you before it gets too bad.
◇◇◇
You woke up the next morning feeling and looking like utter shit. Mai and Miwa had to dress you up and drag you out of bed.
“There’s only one thing you can do now Y/N.” Mai said as she straightened out your collar. “Get over him.”
Huh. Easier said than done.
◇◇◇
There was a drastic change in your behaviour towards Noritoshi. The name "Noritoshi-senpai", that you had always cheerily called out, was replaced by a short and curt "Kamo-san" whenever conversation was necessary. Also, you don’t look into his eyes anymore.
You avoided him as much as you can, thanking yourself for knowing his schedule so well. Not hesitating to turn and go around in another direction if you ever saw him approaching from a distance. Because of this he rarely sees you on campus.
It hurt Noritoshi badly to see you act this way. He never realized just how warm you were with him until now that it was all gone. He tried to catch you during your breaks, calling out your name with the same tenderness he always had. But it was in vain as you ran away from him.
Todo and Momo wisely chose not to make any snide comments, upon seeing how downhearted Noritoshi was in the following days.
Everybody avoided eye contact with both of you if and when you had to interact. It couldn't be helped. The tension was like a fine piece of glass waiting to shatter.
The pain in your heart didn't subside at all. You've taken to staring at the mark on your wrist.
'Did I successfully reject our bond?' You wondered hollowly.
Sometimes you half expect your mark to start flashing wildly, like whenever you and Noritoshi have off days with each other. But this is the first time you've seen it so… silent.
You wrapped it up with more darker velvet strips and ignored it.
It was the opposite on Noritoshi’s end. He would lie in bed and stare at the mark that is dangerously bright red and hot. It almost felt painful, like someone was searing a brand onto his skin.
He wrapped it up in gauze bandages and put salves to soothe the mark. But it was never enough. He needed you back.
◇◇◇
During one afternoon, you just finished an English lesson with one of the windows who teaches at Jujutsu High. You stood up from your desk and turned to see the man outside of your classroom.
"Y/n, are you free for lunch?" Noritoshi had obviously sprinted as soon as his lessons had ended. “We need to talk.” All 4 of you looked up to see him outside the classroom, as composed as ever. But he looked terrible.
There were shadows under his eyes, and he seemed to have gotten thinner. The shitty side of you was cruelly happy. Good that he’s like this, because he lost his toy. Good on him. But your heart was sad, yelling at you to go back and take care of him already.
"Ah I'm sorry, but I've got lunch with the rest of the 1st year's here." You politely declined. Trying to school your face into a neutral expression.
"I insist." He firmly stated. He looked over to the other students. "You don't mind if I borrow her do you?"
You inwardly scoffed at his poor choice of words. The stupid arse still thinks I'm his belonging apparently. Something to be borrowed and used.
But Mai stepped up. "If she doesn't want to hang out with you then she doesn't." Miwa was fidgeting worriedly. "Now now." She started.
"I really wanted to have lunch with my fellow 1st years, if you could please excuse us Kamo San." You hastily uttered, pulling Mai's arms towards you while turning away. The other first years followed your lead.
But Noritoshi was determined. He quickly put his hand on your shoulder, only for you to slap it away and flinch from him. Everybody froze.
You were clearly trembling, which made Noritoshi lower his hand and step back. "I'm sorry y/n." Whether the apology was for holding you without your consent or for everything that happened, you painfully let it slide. Silently bowing to him, then quickly walking away with the others.
Noritoshi could only watch wistfully as your figure disappeared from his view.
◇◇◇
"The nerve of shitty men," Mai angrily stuffed her mouth with eggs from her bento. "Thinking they own women, that they're better than us. It was like this with the men in my family as well. Bullying and kicking aside the weaker women."
You sadly poked at your food. It was katsudon. You ordered it ahead of time from the cafeteria, wanting to perk up with a favorite dish. But today it tastes so bland. It wasn't the cooking that was off. Just that you had no appetite.
"Wouldn't you want to talk it out with Kamo senpai, y/n?" Miwa asked. Truth be told you were adding fire to the problem. You just dumped your anger on Noritoshi and kept rudely cutting him off before leaving him.
But your pride and broken heart didn't allow you to go back to him. "I don't think there's anything left for me to say or do to be honest. I'm not in the mood to face him. At all." You lied.
Mechamaru surprisingly spoke out, "Love is a fickle thing. And it's a fact that women are more in tune with their emotions than men are. But I think you won't regret it if you give him a chance. Kamo Noritoshi isn't a bad man."
Mai huffed. "Whose side are you even on?"
"There are no sides. Just two idiots who are madly in love with each other." Mechamaru dryly replied.
Your heart clenched, but you stayed silent, not denying the fact that even after you pushed him away, you still loved him.
"Let's talk about something else shall we?" Miwa hurriedly changed the topic and started discussing the homework to be done.
◇◇◇
Hiroki was both the best and the worst brother you could ask for. Because he chose this time to surprise you with a visit at Kyoto High, claiming he wanted to see how you were doing with classes and that he would stay for a while.
Secretly, he wanted to meet and gauge Noritoshi, only to find out that the both of you have just broken up. You brought him into your dorm room to have a chat and some snacks.
“WHA?! YOU- You ended things with your soulmate?! You were together for like what?! 4 Months?” His jaw dropped as you told him the entire story.
You gave a drawn out sigh. “Hiro nii, I’m done. Like… He… I dunno anymore. To be honest I broke up with him in the heat of the moment.”
“Tsk, you’ve always been led by your emotions. That’s why you’re so reckless half the time sis. You didn’t even try to talk it out with him.” He asked as he opened a bag of chips.
You stayed silent and reached for chips. Chewing and ignoring him.
“What’s with you and bottling all your pent up anger only to toss it onto the poor guy? Didn’t even give him a chance to explain himself.” he tutted.
You whirled on him angrily. “They just want me for my power. Then they’ll let him off with like a dozen women around him. What the fuck is there for him to explain?!”
Hiroki looked way too calm. “Who are 'they'?”
You paused. “The Kamo family.”
“Are you 100% sure Noritoshi was in this only to use you?”
“Like 99.99%...” you trailed off. Hiroki eyed you knowingly. “That 0.01 percent chance of him loving you. You considered it, even though that’s a small ass probability sis. But hey, that’s your man. If you want him out, our family’s got your back. I’ll beat him up for you if you need me to”
You shook your head at him.
Hiroki sighed, “Though with that concubine thing, I can see it happenin’. Clan heads are desperate to have a son with the inherited technique. The Gojo clan just got lucky with Satoru. We dunno if it’s normal in the Kamo clan though. But with you as his soulmate, he shouldn’t need any. Somethin ain’t addin up…” He got lost in thought.
“You won’t know until you talk with Kamo himself.”
You sadly continued eating your chips. “I hate it when you’re right.”
◇◇◇
The next morning Utahime urgently called for a full student body plus all available jujutsu sorcerers on site for a meeting.
You and Hiroki stumbled into the room, almost late, pushing against each other. The other students looked curiously at the man who was fighting you for space on the couch.
You jabbed him in the gut and put a leg over his. “Uhhhh y/n who is that?” Mai asked.
Your cousin shrugged your leg off of his, stood up and said his greetings, “Hello, I am Tsuchimikado Hiroki. Alumni here at Kyoto Jujutsu High. Semi-grade 1 sorcerer. Pleased to meet you all and thanks for taking care of my lil sis- ah I mean cousin.”
“Ohhhh” Miwa took a closer look. You noticed Noritoshi glancing over at you. Todo walked up to him and pointed a finger, “Tsuchi’s relative? Then what woman is your idea-”
You used your technique to immobilise Todo and forced him to sit down in a daze. “Sorry for my rudeness, senpai. You can have that convo later.” You knew it would take too long if this starts again.
Hiroki looked affronted, “It’s rude to point bruh.”
Utahime clapped her hands to gather your attention as Principal Gakuganji appeared on the podium.
“Thank you so much all for coming into this meeting on such short notice. Especially to the alumni and other available Jujutsu sorcerers. Let's get straight to the point: I am here to announce that War is coming.”
Blood Bound: Table of Contents
#kamo noritoshi#angst fic#Jjk fanfic#jujutsu kaisen fanfication#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen fluff#noritoshi x y/n#noritoshi x you#kamo noritoshi x reader#noritoshi x o/c#jjk x y/n#noritoshi angst#utahime#zenin mai#todo aoi#mechamaru#miwa#blood bound#blackened bond#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#kamo x you#jjk imagines
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crewfu: fanfic spotlight :)
Angel of Life, Bringer of Death by woofles1990 (5up/Steve, teen rating, gen | 377 words, chaptered WIP)
Summary: Steve and Dk just wanted to explore a dungeon. That's all they wanted! A certain angel clearly had other plans.
flashover by Anonymous (Apollo & 5up, teen rating, gen | 853 words)
Summary: n. the moment a conversation becomes real and alive, which occurs when a spark of trust shorts out the delicate circuits you keep insulated under layers of irony, momentarily grounding the static emotional charge you've built up through decades of friction with the world. OR: it's pretty stupid to sleep on the tiles of a subway station, even though you are well aware you have a home. It's also quite embarrassing to have a friend pick you up from there.
Sparks Fly by Rocketro (5up/Fundy, gen rating, m/m | 863 words)
Summary: 5up and Fundy watch fireworks together.
you're holding back (shut up and dance with me) by lytriis (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.2k words)
Summary: 5up and steve dance.
what happens in Vegas by aphilologicalbatman (Apollo/Steve, explicit rating, m/m | 1.4k words)
Summary: "I'm pretty sure this is a bad idea, Steve." "Nah, this is a great idea, dude." (Or: the one where they hook up in Vegas.)
quiet when i'm coming home by homeward_bound (5up/Hafu/David, teen rating, gen & multi | 1.4k words)
Summary: 5up comes home from LA.
i could peel it for you by sweetlikesugr (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2k words)
Summary: One appletini at a time, 5up ponders about oranges, buttons and celestial bodies.
from blossoms by 5280ft (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2k words)
Summary: “O, to take what we love inside, to carry within us an orchard, to eat not only the skin, but the shade, not only the sugar, but the days, to hold the fruit in our hands, adore it, then bite into the round jubilance of peach. There are days we live as if death were nowhere in the background; from joy to joy to joy, from wing to wing, from blossom to blossom to impossible blossom, to sweet impossible blossom.” -Li-Young Lee, From Blossoms
you think that i'm foolish now by amsves (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.1k words)
Summary: “Is everything okay?” That’s a stupid question and Steve knows it. If everything was okay, Five wouldn’t be randomly appearing at his hotel room at—Steve checks his phone—2:37 in the morning. Their group had split up for the night a few hours ago, uncharacteristically early for them, but Five had had plans to talk to—
Like you wouldn't notice by Anonymous (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.1k words)
Summary: Apollo is having feelings, so he pushes them down and hopes Steve doesn't notice. Avoiding Steve was never going to end well. "From that moment on, Apollo becomes hyper-aware of all things Steve. The way his long leg touches his, hip-to-knee, in the bar booth when they're drinking overpriced cocktails."
Vegas Lights by amethystvxidwalker (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.3k words)
Summary: “You were planning on actually swimming with me, right?” Steve faced him, brown eyes and dopey grin almost making Five swoon. He forced himself to focus on Steve’s face rather than the black ink above his hip, small, blocky text that read ‘SUGR?’ because of course it did.
ice-cream-covered screaming hyperactive thought by cj__writes (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.5k words)
Summary: Apollo isn’t sure when, exactly, he fell in love with Steve. Maybe, just maybe, he thinks, he never really fell. Maybe, he’s been falling. He’s still falling.
u spilled orange on u by SmearedWords (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 3.1k words)
Summary: Five times Dumbdog thinks Steve is illegally attractive and the one time he tries to admit that to him. Keyword: tries.
My love is the evening breeze touching your skin by tumtummeke (Apollo & Steve, general rating, gen | 5.2k words)
Summary: Steve's love language is physical touch. Dumbdog's is... not that. A day at the beach with Steve and Dumbdog (and background crewfu), told in five touches.
be like the love that discovered sin by Qupid (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 5.6k words)
Summary: It’s annoying because Apollo even left for work a whole hour early today, which should be enough time to get to his shitty office job like everyone else on the train, but unlike everyone else, Apollo also has a second job. Which leads to the last reason why Apollo is having a bad day: being pinned under an overturned car while a villain monologues at him. Well, that last reason isn’t really part of Apollo’s bad day, but sue him if he wants to include the misfortunes of his hero identity Dumbdog while listing the reasons for his bad mood. “I don’t have time for this, Suptic,” Apollo grits out, interrupting the villain’s monologue.
friends in this town by 5280ft (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 6.1k words)
Summary: Five only realizes he’s bitten his nails down to the quick when the sting of pain catches up to him. He’s probably overthinking. He just needs to talk to Hafu. That’s all. ...He doesn’t want to. He’s worried he will only hear an answer he’ll hate. Out back, putting off talking to his sister really gives Five a sense of deja vu. All he needs to complete the feeling is Steve. “You need to relax, man.” Speak of the devil.
this party's just another haunted house by cj__writes (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 7.7k words, chaptered WIP)
Summary: On December 31st, Apollo wakes up in his hotel in Vegas. The problem is, it's always December 31st.
call me by your name (i don't know that's pretty gay) by Qupid (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 10k words)
Summary: “Oh!” The human suddenly exclaimed, “You probably want my name!” Five had no interest in holding the power of a name over a human, it always seemed more trouble than it was worth, “Not particu-” “I’m Steve! It’s a pleasure to meet someone as cute as you.” The human, Steve, interrupted before 5up could finish. 5up’s eyes widened as he felt the power of gaining a name rush through him. It was intoxicating and he could see why some fae would frequently come to the human realm just to trick humans into giving up their names. Five hadn’t needed to trick Steve, the man had given up his name freely and Five couldn’t believe how goddamn stupid he was to do it. “Ohhhh my god you’re an idiot.”
you'll hear me howling outside your door by Qupid (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 22.2k words)
Summary: Something warm blew against Steve’s face and, distantly, he heard a high pitched whine. A nudge, and when Steve ignored it, a more insistent push had him opening his eyes to the face of a wolf mere inches from his own. Steve laughed. How delightful! He was hallucinating animals now. The wolf’s fur looked bright to him, but even with as dark as it was Steve could tell it wasn’t white. Maybe it was more of a sandy color. Not that it mattered when all Steve could focus on was its piercing gaze and how its eyes seemed to bore into his soul. The wolf whined again and nudged Steve in the shoulder with its nose, making the man rear back when he realized that this might actually be a real wolf and not a hallucination at all.
kinda good for my love by sweetlikesugr (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 44.7k words, chaptered)
Summary: 5up can’t really recall the exact moment when dares became his and Steve’s thing and he is not sure if he even wants to try - after all, why would you mess with something that feels so natural, that feels so right? Why not just let it take its course and see where it might lead them?
Also: mangoedges‘s 5up the human impostor collection!
FAQ:
Wait what is this: pretty straight to the point! i’ll regularly share crewfu-related fanfictions to this blog :)
How regularly is “regularly”?: great question! LOL. it depends on the flow of fanfics that get uploaded, which i do not have any control over, but i’m looking forward to do this twice a month. after all, it’s only me doing this and i often run on a tight schedule.
What’s the format like?:
[title of fic with link] by [author of the fic with link] ([main pairing(s)], [fic rating: eg, general rating], [relationship: eg, m/m] | [word count in k], [added prompt to specify if it’s complete or not])
Summary: [summary provided by the author. if it doesn’t have a summary, a “No summary” prompt will be put instead]
(What does WIP mean again?): Work In Progress :)
Why are you doing this?: from the beginning, my blog has hosted conversations about RPF (real people fiction) and crewfu pairings. this has evolved into people sending me updates about certain fics in the crewfu tags every now and then, but i wanna take the next step and just do these things myself. after all, i’m already lurking in the tags often to see the fics that get posted. as someone who is both a writer and a reader, i wanna appreciate fanfic writers and help out other people that want to read fanfic and consume more fandom content!
Will it be AO3 only?: well, ao3 has a very helpful tag system that makes finding fics incredibly easy, as well as allowing people with no accounts to like and comment on fics, so that’s the site i will personally look in for fanworks. but if there are any fics you’ve written or liked in any other platforms, such as wattpad, you can always contact me through my inbox (send an ask or a dm!), and i’ll make sure to include for the next fanfic spotlight :)
Does it mean you won’t reply to fic asks anymore?: yeah, i guess. since i’ll be doing the searching myself it seems counterproductive. but if i ever skip a fic or again, it’s in another platform, or you’ve posted/read the fic a while ago and you want to get more traction on it, hit me up and i’ll take it into consideration!
Will you read every single one of the fics on your list?: oh no. again, i run on a tight schedule, and also i have my own taste when it comes to fics. i won’t be reviewing fics or any of the sort, and my intention extends to simply sharing these fics to this page so people will have easier access to them :) that’s where ao3 tagging becomes SUPER useful!!!
So what’s the criteria for the way you’ll sort out the fics in your list?: word count, going from lowest to highest. in case of fics in other platforms, i guess i’ll put them at the top of the list. i’ll also be looking for fairly recent fics, so let me know if you want any old-ish fic to be included.
I see you talking mostly about 5up/Steve and Steve/Apollo. Can I still send/see other crewfu fics?: why yes absolutely! my goal is to push every fic which heavily features regular crewfu characters - 5uptic and supdog just happen to be very popular pairings. so, to give you a list: core 4 (5up, hafu, dk, steve), apollo, aipha, annie, janet, kimi, ellum, koji… you know the drill. it doesn’t have to be centered on a relationship, or about 5up in specific, etc. my only requirement is that any of the previously mentioned members are a central part of the fic or are HEAVILY featured in it (sorry, minecraft fics with 50+ tags who only mention 5up as an afterthought won’t make the cut :/).
Isn’t shipping Bad™?: well, it’s a little more nuanced than that. i will go out of my way to discourage and shame people who often violate CCs’ boundaries by acting like so and so has a crush on this person, or that this and that are Actually Into Each Other or secretly dating. any sort of tinhat bullshit is a big nono (think larries). but i run on the assumption that people who write rpf understand that what they’re doing is simply write a completely fictional story using real life personalities, and understand the boundaries necessary to do it - aka they’re not tinhats, they understand they can’t assume everything about CCs’ thoughts and personalities, they understand that what they’re writing is strictly fiction, they keep these works only in fandom circles, etc. (but again, it’s only one me doing this, so please be kind if i don’t happen to know that this person is Actually a tinhat or whatever).
show fic: NO. (seriously. i don’t feel comfortable putting my ao3 account out there. please respect my privacy on these trying times <3)
I REALLY don’t care about your rpf/fic talk: fair! i’ll be tagging every single one of these posts as “fanfic spotlight”, so just mute the tag using tumblr settings so you’ll never have to look at these! likewise, you can follow the tag if you want to keep up with it, or search it on my blog to look at the other entries you might have missed.
Hey, my fic is here and I don’t feel comfortable with it being shared over here: no problem! let me know as soon as you can and i’ll take it down <3
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study date(s)
"Bertholdt knows that he needs to start trying. It’s junior year, and he’d rather not stay stuck in the same class next year as a senior. If he fails the next test, he’s in some shit. So, he's going to ask you for help."
pairing - bertholdt hoover x reader
tags - high school au, fluff, humor, texting
warnings - none
author’s note - this was just a one shot but i kept writing lol it kind of switches between you and bertholdt, but i don't directly say his thoughts, it's kind of like 2nd person omniscient if that's even a thing LOL
lmk how the texting reads, i'll change it if it's weird
reblogs and comments are appreciated ! mwah
ao3
chapter 1 - two days
reinah: I swear if you don’t just ASK her
Do you want to be held back?
bertoto: relax okay i’ll do it :(
r: Okay, okay
Lmk how it goes
b: i never said i was asking today
Bertholdt sighs and locks his phone once he sees Reiner start to type a reply.
Bertholdt is struggling with English, which surprises him. He’s a good student in every other class, but the moment Mr. Ackermann starts talking, he finds himself dozing off, missing the lecture. Recently, though, he’s awake in class, but still not paying attention. All his focus is on you, who sat in the middle of the classroom while he sat in the back, due to his height (he didn’t really mind, though; better chance of not getting caught asleep).
One day, due to some miraculous occurrence, the short, stern teacher actually had the boy’s attention, but not for long.
“Does anyone have number three?” Mr. Ackermann asked. Bertholdt definitely didn’t. He hoped someone would raise their hand so the teacher wouldn’t resort to calling a random name.
To his relief, you did.
“I think what the author was trying to convey was…”
Bertholdt didn’t really get what you were saying, but he admired your intelligence. You knew the material and could explain it in detail, while he couldn’t even recall the book's name in question.
He started to admire more of your traits - he gazed as you would lightly, but briskly, tap your foot in frustration when you didn’t know an answer and smile at the way your face relaxed when you finally got it. Seeing your motivation in class kickstarted his.
Bertholdt knows that he needs to start trying. It’s junior year, and he’d rather not stay stuck in the same class next year as a senior. If he fails the next test, he’s in some shit.
So, he's going to ask you for help.
...Tomorrow.
-
“Girl, I don’t have any more fucking gum. I drove up to Costco, bought the value sized pack, and you somehow managed to chew all of it.” You say exasperatedly, shutting your locker.
Sasha pouts. “Are you sureeee? There’s prolly half a stick left in your front pocket…”
You swat her hand away. “There’s. Nothing. Left. I promise.” She continues to stare at your bag.
“Fuckin-” You mutter, reaching into your bag and pulling out a snack-size bag of Cheezits. They’re one of your favorite snacks, but you know you can’t win when it comes to Sasha and food. You reluctantly hand the bag to her.
“Thanks, y/n!” She smiles and tears open the bag.
“Yknow, you can be annoying as shit, Sasha.”
She winks at you and eats her stolen prize. You turn to leave and head to 3rd period. English.
Hm. You’re usually greeted by your other best friend around now-
“Yeoooo!!” Oh, there he is. Connie daps you up before wrapping his arm around your shoulders. “What’s good?”
“I don’t really wanna go to 3rd," you answer. "Sasha stole my Cheezits."
“Does anyone really wanna go to any class? And that's your fault, you know you can't bring food without Sasha's fatass taking it,” Connie replies, and Sasha punches his shoulder.
“Okay, I know...have you started studying for the test?”
He blankly stares at you. Guess not. You have the same teacher, but different periods, so you can’t keep an eye on him.
“Nevermind. I’ll see y’all later.” You throw up a peace sign and head in the opposite direction.
It’s not like you’re bad at English, but you just don’t like school in general. You go to class to get your participation grade, then go home.
There might be another reason you tolerate 3rd period, though, and it isn’t the professor. (He is pretty fine, but he's an adult, so you don’t let your thoughts escalate).
-
Mr. Ackermann didn’t like assigning things online, so most of the work in this class was on paper, contrasting your other classes where everything was digital. Kind of annoying, but you’ve learned to deal with it.
You mainly use mechanical pencils because you hate the way wooden ones write, but one day, to your slight dismay, you forgot them at home. Just your luck.
There’s a container of pencils and a sharpener in the back of the classroom, so you stand up to go retrieve one and notice a tall boy asleep in a desk not too far back from yours.
Bertholdt Hoover.
You knew him, of course. You find it a little rude to not know your classmates' names; you’ve dealt with numerous “who?”s in previous years and don’t want to put anyone through that, so you make sure to pay attention during introductions.
You chuckle at sight. The class has barely even started, and the guy is already dozing. In an awkward position, at that. One of his long legs is across the other, cramped underneath the desk. His head was laying on his right arm with his left against his hair. You thought to wake him up, but he looked so peaceful, you couldn't bring yourself to do it, plus, it's not your business. Mr Ackermann somehow didn't notice either, so Bertholdt always had a good rest in 3rd period English.
Every time you walked into class, you checked to see what weird position he would be sleeping in. You found yourself looking forward to it- he looked kinda cute when he was sleeping- but he stopped one day. You were a little disappointed, but glad to know that he was starting to pay attention in class. You still glanced at him as you walked in- he's a pretty attractive guy. No harm in just looking...
-
You shrug your backpack off and sit at your desk, stretching your legs out a bit. The walk from your locker to this classroom was kind of far. You reach into your bag, get your mechanical pencil out, and wait for Mr Ackermann to pass out the first assignment.
Just then, you hear someone walk up to your desk, and you glance over.
‘Oh, it’s Bertholdt. I don’t think we’ve ever spoken.’ You feel your face heat up, wondering what he wanted from you.
“Hey, y/n…” He nervously starts.
“Hey. Need something?”
“Yeah, actually...about the upcoming test.”
You hum in curiosity. “What about it?”
He clears his throat. “I’m lowkey failing this class, and if I mess up this test, I’ll have to retake this class next year. Do you think you could, uh…”
Bertholdt inhales in an attempt to calm himself down. It doesn’t really work.
“Could you help me study?” Phew. He managed to get it out pretty well and made a mental note to give himself a pat on the back later. But he hasn’t fully succeeded yet; you still need to agree.
You weren't opposed to the idea. You kind of figured he would be struggling in class a bit since he used to sleep all the time. It’s alright with you, and you wouldn’t mind a potential new friend. Sasha and Connie were exhausting at times.
“Yeah, sure. When?” You pause. “Actually, just text me.” You hold out your hand, asking for his phone.
Bertholdt was practically shaking in his sneakers as he reached into his pocket and handed you his unlocked phone with the contacts app open. You actually agreed! And you were giving him your number! Reiner was going to be so proud, he smiled to himself.
As you type in your info, you appreciate the cleanliness of his phone. That shows you that he’s at least hygienic.
“Aight. Here you go,” you return his device. “See you later.” You smile.
Bertholdt can’t believe this is happening.
Mr Ackermann’s voice interrupts his thoughts. “Oi, Hoover. Sit down.”
Startled, he jumps back a bit at the sudden acknowledgement. He was focused on you and tuned everything else out.
“Sorry, sir.” Bertholdt gives you a quick grin and turns to go back to his desk. Once he sits, he looks down at the new contact:
y/n :)
xxx-xxx-xxxx
Bertholdt can’t help but smile. Just seeing your name and number on his screen made him giddy, and he thought that the smiley face you added was adorable.
His thoughts are interrupted yet again, but not by the teacher. He looks down at his phone, which just buzzed.
| Messages
reinah
Did you do it yet bruh
Good timing. Bertholdt taps on the notification and goes to type a reply, but decides to send him a screenshot of your contact…with your number scribbled out. Reiner was a flirt, and he didn’t want to risk anything.
r: YOOOOOOOOOO HOLY SHIT U ACTUALLY DID IT
Bertholdt rolls his eyes and puts his phone in his backpack. He was going to pay attention- for real - today. He didn't want to seem too clueless when you tutored him.
“Can anyone tell me what rhetorical strategy is being used here?” Mr. Ackermann asked.
Bertholdt certainly could not. But that was changing soon, with your help.
--
“Okaay, we got Ms. Tutor over here now,” Sasha smiles in between bites of a burger.
“Do you even know how to, like, teach, though?” Connie gives you a skeptical look.
“It prolly isn’t too hard. All I gotta do is help him study. If he needs help understanding a concept, I’ll just explain it,” you defend yourself. “We still have two weeks. Ion mind making flashcards or something.”
“You’re getting into it, huh?” Sasha laughs.
Your face heats in embarrassment. “Girl, you know it isn’t like that.”
“And why not? You’re always bitching about how lonely you are. High school isn’t gonna last forever…” she replies.
“I have no recollection of saying anything like that.” You glare. But she isn’t exactly wrong. You’d like to experience the “high school romance” you’ve heard so much about, and Bertholdt is pretty cute. It’s not like dating is a significant concern, though.
“I’m always here as an option, y/n,” Connie winks as he takes a sip of his soda.
“Hell nah.”
Across the cafeteria, Bertholdt is trying to eat a sandwich, but Reiner won’t leave him alone. He was right about Reiner being proud, but Bertholdt almost forgot how persistent the jock could get.
“I didn’t think you had the balls, dude. I was ready to see English 3 on your schedule again next year,” He grins, arm around his taller friend's shoulders.
“...Can I eat?” Bertholdt sighs and shrugs his friend away.
“Have you texted her yet? What day are you gonna hang out with her? You gonna bring her anything? Flowers or somethin’? Girls like that kinda stuff.”
Bertholdt didn’t really think that was true.
“First off, no, not yet. I need to see when I can actually go. Second, no, I am not bringing her anything. I didn’t say it was a date. She’s going to help me study.”
“Fine, man. At least try to seem more interesting, yknow, so she can like...be interested in you.”
“Are you saying I’m boring? Ouch,” He jokingly pouts and rolls his eyes at Reiner’s double usage of ‘interesting.’
“You said it, not me.”
“Okay, I don’t wanna hear that from you...if it came from Annie, then I’d believe it.” Bertholdt looks in the blonde’s direction. She took a bite from her burger, looked up from her phone, and shrugged.
“Damn, for real?” Bertholdt sinks. He didn’t think he was that dull. He did lots of interesting stuff, like…
Like…
Bertholdt sighs in defeat.
“It’s fine. Maybe y/n likes boring,” Bertholdt huffs, taking another bite from his sandwich.
“Yeah, okay, keep telling yourself that and see where it gets you…” Reiner mumbles.
“Come again?”
“Nothing, man…”
School's been over for an hour or two. You’re aimlessly scrolling through your phone when you feel a buzz, and glance towards the top of the screen.
| Messages
xxx-xxx-xxxx
hey
it’s bertholdt 😁
where should we meet up?
Your heart starts to beat a little faster. ‘Relax, girl… don't act like he's asking you out or something,’ you tell yourself.
y/n: hey!
how abt the library?
+ what day/ time works for you?
You add his number to your contacts as you wait for his response.
bertholdt :^)
is saturday at 3 okay?
y/n: yep
do you need a ride or anything?
b: no, but thank you
see you then ☺️
y/n: alrighty :)
You smile at his use of emojis, send what he requested, then swipe down on your screen to check the day (what? It's normal to forget sometimes.) Wednesday. Two days.
You feel like it would be awkward to study with Bertholdt considering you aren’t really friends, so you decide to text him a little more so it isn't too bad when the day arrives.
----
“See? That wasn’t so hard!” Reiner exclaims. “You could’ve tried to talk to her more, but it went good!”
“I think it would’ve been weird if I did say anything else. Best to leave it at that…” Bertholdt exclaims, trying to calm himself down. He had two days.
He wonders what he should do now. Study so he could impress you? Do something to make himself seem more interesting? What would he even do...?
Bertholdt taps back onto the conversation to reread it for the 6th time. Was there anything he could’ve said different? Should he try asking you someth-
Oh, wait-? You’re typing?
“Oh shit- Dude, she’s saying something else. What do I do?” He begins to panic. Did you suddenly decide he wasn’t worth your time? Were you cancelling?
y/n: sooo
how’s your day been?
Whaaaaaatttt?? You actually...care to ask?
Bertholdt stared at his phone in surprise.
“What’d she say? Cmon! Don’t just look, dude!”
“She...asked how my day’s been-”
“-You gotta reply now! You were on the chat when she said it, so she knows you’ve read it!” Reiner urges.
Shit. He doesn't have enough time to think of a good reply.
good, but better since i’m texting you 😉|
The hell? No, that’s weird. And too soon. He tries again...
pretty good, thanks!
kinda stressing over the test, haha
how’s your day going?
There we go. He twiddles his thumbs as he waits for your reply.
y/n :)
oh, dw, it’ll be fine !
my day was okay
sasha took my last bag of cheez its :(
b: ah, i'm sorry abt that :(
+ yeah, you're right
have you as my tutor :)
“Nice job man! That was...kinda flirty? You’ll get there!” Reiner ruffles his hair in encouragement, and Bertholdt shoos him away. He stares at his phone in anticipation. Was that too much?
----
i have you as my tutor :)
You lean your head on your pillow and feel your face heat up at the compliment ( was that a compliment?)
It’s not like you’re dumb, so he’s not wrong to think that. Your lips curl into a smile as you reread the message. But how do you reply? Should you compliment him back? You don’t really know.
if you’re saying i’m smart, thank you :))
hoping that wasn't sarcasm lol
You wait a minute, and he doesn’t reply, so you decide to ask another question.
is there anything specific you wanna focus on?
You cringe at the double texting, but hope that it doesn't make him think you're weird. You swipe away from the conversation and scroll on various apps as you wait.
b: ofc it wasn’t sarcasm, you're really smart, y/n!
i'm mainly struggling with rhetorical strategies and logical fallacies, but i could
use a general review too
if that's okay with you
You bury your almost overheating face into your pillow. Why is something like that getting you flustered, you wonder. You sit up, take a deep breath, and focus on the second part of his message. You're pretty good with what he needs work on, and a general review should be easy to put together.
y/n :) okay, we can focus on the first 2 on saturday
we can review the unit on other days
see you at school:)
At this point, you really don’t know how this conversation could go any further, so you ended it. Bertholdt returns your goodbye.
You exhale and sit up in your bed. Hopefully tutoring him won’t be too awkward now that you’ve spoken to him a bit, and there's still tomorrow at school to speak to him. You find yourself excited for the study date tutoring session, since you could get your homework done too.
"Two days," you smile.
#bertholdt x reader#bertholdt hoover#bertolt hoover#bertolt fubar#high school au#texting#aot#attack on titan#shinkegi no kyojin#bertholdt fubar#ao3#fanfic
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Can you make a part 2 on the levi angst? like maybe a few months later and they still haven't reconciled because levi believes the reader doing well without him then the reader gets badly injured and u can decide what happens next :))
A/N: Of course I can! I actually got a second request from @/centerhabit and even a third one from @/blancc-bunny to finish it so I hope you guys enjoy this happy and fluffy continuation! ੧(❛▿❛✿)੭
Tags: Levi x reader ✅ SFW ✅ slight angst ✅ fluff ✅
image/art source: DeviantArt [art by Bev-Nap]
━━━━☆ ━━━━☆ ━━━━☆
By my side - Levi x reader
A few months had passed since you had broken up with Levi and you genuinely felt better. Your small inferiority complex had subsided and thanks to Hanji you felt like everyday was a small adventure on its own. It kinda pained you to admit that you felt much safer by her side than when you were alongside Levi’s squad.
But if you felt that much better...then what was that empty feeling you couldn’t get rid of?
The answer was simple, but you didn’t want to admit it since you felt like you had no right to actually mourn what had happened. You were the one who wanted to end it all after all. Levi begged you not to do it and tried apologizing to you countless of times, but no matter what he did or said, you just shook your head and remained silent.
“(Y/N)! Are you even listening?”
Hanji’s cheerful and loud voice interrupted your train of thoughts, making you realize that as of right now the two of you were sharing a table in the Survey Corps’ lunchroom while having a small meal before starting your day.
“Sorry Hanji, I was just thinking about something. Would you mind running that by me again?“
With a small pout on her lips she obliged and answered: “So, as I was saying...Erwin asked us to go out today and examine a titan they caught a day ago.“
It was hard to not get hyped up for the mission while observing the big grin on her face.Instead of answering, you nodded multiple times, excited to finally be able to go out again which just resulted into you being teased by your comrade ending with the two of you laughing loudly attracting all kind of looks from the cadets.
But there was one look in particular that differed from any other.
Levi...
He looked at you from the corners of his eyes while silently drinking his tea. Seeing you smile like that made him feel relieved, he had always known that a smile suited you way more than anything else, but knowing that you were able to smile like that because he wasn't a part of your life anymore only made him feel worse.
Every time he looked at you, Levi couldn't help but remember the fight you guys had back in his office. The moment you jumped at him and began punching his face, he was quite startled and even if he could have protected himself he decided against it, knowing that you weren't that type of person to randomly throw punches without a good reason.
After you had broken up with him, he himself was quite depressed and even if he tried hiding it it was taking a toll on him. It all started with small mistakes like being slightly late or forgetting to tie his shoelaces, but it all took a turn to the worse when his mistakes began getting in the way of his missions. Erwin had then called him to his office, he didn't ask any questions since he already knew what the reason behind Levi's change was. All he did was promise to tell him everything what happened around and with you in exchange for Levi reverting back to his old self.
That idea seemed good at first and it even motivated him to a degree, but after some weeks he realized that he might have been better off not knowing anything. He was in constant worry for you and gruesome scenarios just kept on entering his head and dominating his thoughts, the worst part of it all was that up until now you've only been on missions inside of the walls, but never outside...not up until now.
Yesterday Erwin had left him a small note on his desk that said Hanji and you would be leaving the walls to examine a titan, he almost fainted then and there but the thought that he'd see at least see you one more time before that made him worry less.
Suddenly Hanji's loud voice interrupted his train of thoughts. She was standing right besides his table, wide grin on her face and next to her was none other than you...smiling. Smiling? Yes, you were smiling. At him no less. Even if this wasn't your most brightest smile, his heart was still thumping hard against his chest, but thanks to his permanent poker face he was able to hide his excitement quite well from the both of you.
"What do you want shitty glasses?"
The woman completely ignored his harsh comment and proceeded telling him about your mission. Not only was your former capitan good in hiding his emotions but he was also pretty good in acting. The whole time Hanji talked he simply nodded and took several glances at you which you failed to notice. She couldn't finish her entire repertoire, thanks to Mike who came over urging you two to get yourselves ready for the departure.
You whispered a quiet 'goodbye' to your former capitan, but before you could follow your superior, Levi suddenly grabbed your wrist. His hold was firm, but also gentle at the same time, it made you unintentionally remember the times he had held you and that only caused your heart rate to quicken.
"(Y/N)...please be careful"
His gentle voice didn't help you with your embarrassment, the only thing it did was worsen it. You refused to look into his face so you just nodded.
Levi sighed, letting go of your wrist as walked past you. The only thing you could do was close your eyes, praying that he didn't see how red your face was.
——
How could this happen?
All you did was turn around in order to look at the countless notes Hanji had thrown on the ground. Who could’ve thought that the Titan would use that short moment to actually grab you?
A small shriek had left your mouth when you felt the enormous hand tightly wrap around your body. Fortunately Erwin had sent you out with some soldiers (just in case) and they didn’t hesitate to come to your aid before the titan squeezed the life out of you. You were saved quickly, but you didn’t come out of that situation unharmed.
——
“What the hell happened?”
Levi was fuming.
The moment he saw Mike and some other soldier carry you on a stretcher, he dropped everything he was working on and was running after them asking question after question, managing to convince Mike to explain everything that had happened.
Seeing humanity’s strongest soldier sitting in front of the nursing room completely hunched over, face buried in his hands was something no one would’ve dared to even dream about so seeing exactly that was beginning to make some soldiers question either their vision or their sanity.
But Levi couldn’t care less about all of that, right now the only thing he cared about was your health. He still had a lot of questions for Mike, but Levi figured that he’d like to hear the rest from the doctors. He didn’t want any motivational lies...all he wished for right now was the hard truth.
“Captain Ackerman, our work’s done.”
Without looking up the captain just let his hands sink and he stood up, eyes still fixated on his shoes. He didn’t utter a single word, but the doctors knew what he wanted so they provided him with exactly that.
“Everything’s fine now. Luckily (Y/N) was brought here quite quickly so we were able to prevent any fatal injury that would’ve resulted from her broken rib.”
The tension immediately left Levi’s body after he took a deep breath, eyes finally facing forward. Once again words weren’t needed, the soldier just walked towards the nursing room’s closed door and opened it as quietly as he could.
——
You slowly came back to your senses due to a sharp pain in your chest, your whole body felt like it had been hit by a gigantic truck and when you recalled what actually got you in this situation in the first place, it wasn’t that much of a surprise.
But there was something else besides pain. You felt a gentle warmth envelop your left hand, making you wonder if that was just your imagination.
So you slowly began opening your eyes and the first thing you saw was the familiar ceiling of the nursery room. With slow movements you turned your head to the left and what you saw stunned you.
The person who was holding your hand and gently circled your knuckles with his fingers was Levi. He seemed to be lost in his thoughts since he still hadn’t noticed you glancing at his profile.
“Levi...”
The sound of your raspy voice immediately made him turn his head and look at you, worry contorting his normally calm facial features.
“(Y/N)...you’re awake. Oh thank god”
Seeing him wrap both of his hands around your own while silently whispering ‘thank you’ multiple times made your heart ache and you could feel how some tears were slowly making your eyes glassy.
“I can’t do this anymore (Y/N). Every single day I’m worried sick when I hear that you’ll be on a mission without having me by your side and today I even warm you to be careful and look what happens! Your broken rib could’ve perforated your lungs or even worse your heart! What would I have done if that happened, huh?!”
Levi raising his voice like that was something you had never seen happening and additionally to that he himself looked like he was about to cry and that made you feel even sadder.
You watched him completely lose his calm composure, watched his poker face being substituted by countless other expressions you had never seen, watched his whole body tremble like a leaf that was being shaken by the wind, watched how his lips moved quicker than ever before and the only thing you could do was slowly get up and embrace him.
Even if your chest still hurt you just ignored the pain and held him tighter against you. His trembling body began calming down until he finally wrapped his arms as carefully as he could around your body to show you that he was now calm enough and that it was fine to let him go, but you refused.
“You’re being unfair (Y/N), embracing me like that and then refusing to let me go. How am I supposed to forget you under these circumstances?”
“Said the person who waited for me to wake up.”
He placed his forehead in the crack of your neck and sighed in defeat, you on the other hand just giggled and gently caressed his back. Somewhere deep inside of you you had missed that warm feeling of his embrace.
“(Y/N)...I love you, I’ve never stopped loving you. Since our fight I’ve been thinking nonstop about you and the things you said to me, made me realize that it was completely wrong of me to use you as my punching bag and I regret it...I really regret it. I even thought that it really might be better for you to not be by my side since I saw how much more cheerful you were compared to back then, but please let me be selfish about one thing. I want you- no...I want us to be back together like before, laugh with each other like before, spend time together like before and most importantly...love each other like before. P-Please...allow me to change everything I did wrong by myself so that I can make you happy again.”
He had no idea just how much it pained you to find out his true feelings, but you were more overjoyed to actually find out that he still loved and wanted you back as much as you wanted him. So you decided to answer him by simply kissing his lips, letting the kiss do all the talking for you, Levi afraid that this would be your last kiss just cupped your face and returned it with the same passion.
When you wanted to separate yourself from him, the man simply whispered a low ‘one more time’ and continued kissing you until his and your lungs gave out.
It was now your turn to answer him, but first you had to catch your breath while he simply continued kissing your face and neck.
“Levi, you have always been on my mind, even after our fight, but I kept on thinking that I had absolutely no right to mourn since I was the one suggesting a breakup. I realized just how lonely I felt without you by my side, but I tried to mask it with fake smiles and laughter, hoping that it would be easier for me to let go of you..but I just couldn’t. And no Levi...I’m not going to allow you to change yourself on your own.”
The man didn’t know if he should be happy or sad since your last statement gave him mixed feelings, but the wide smile you showed him was answer enough.
“You are going to change yourself while standing...by my side.”
#aot x reader#snk x reader#snk fluff#aot fluff#snk angst#aot angst#snk scenarios#aot scenarios#levi x reader#━𝚂𝙽𝙺#━𝙰𝙾𝚃#━𝙰𝙽𝙾𝙽'𝚂 𝙴𝙲𝙷𝙾#━𝚅𝙸𝚂𝙸𝚃𝙾𝚁'𝚂 𝙴𝙲𝙷𝙾#centerhabit#blancc-bunny
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Fanfic Writer Ask Meme
[source]
Writing
Writing implements – pens? Pencils? Laptop? Tablet? Lined paper? Leather-bound notebook? Why?
laptop! i’d prefer desktop but i don’t have one yet. from like 4th-7th grade i used to write everything in this giant binder i brought to school and none of it is legible and idk how i ever did that shit
When do you write best?
either right after i get up & shower or at like 2am sometimes
Favourite things to write about?
medical things & friendships
What (in your opinion) are your strengths as a writer?
developing relationships maybe?
Any genres or characters you’d like to write, and haven’t yet?
i think i’m gonna have a lot of fun with corazon & doflamingo once i see more of them in canon
Where do your ideas come from?
a lot of prompt lists, lately
Plotting or pantsing?
really depends on the situation, i think both can be good
Do you have any writing buddies?
@bajillianwrites and various people who participate in the r/fanfiction discord sprints!
Do you make playlists or soundtracks for your stories?
yeS the soft focus playlist is one of my favorite things to listen to
Do you have any rituals to prepare you for writing – making moodboards? Having a cup of tea? Exercise?
not rituals necessarily but i do schedule my writing time in google calendar bc having a set amount of time to write before a break helps me Focus
Do you write in chronological order, in complete chaos, or something in between?
usually in chronological order but sometimes i switch scenes around after the fact
What’s hardest – beginning, middle or end?
MIDDLE god i’m there with both of my posted wips rn i think
Are there any ideas you’re holding off writing? Why?
eternity bc i want it to be Good, and some vague ideas set after where i currently am in canon
Is there anything you’re uncomfortable writing?
probably though i haven’t hit it yet
Do you dream and/or daydream about your stories?
surprisingly no? i think i just come up with ideas when i’m like half awake and then desperately try to remember them later
How do you feel about family and friends reading your work?
family is a big no-no unless it’s maybe the fellow Gay Cousin(tm) who probably reads/writes fic themself
i’d probably let non-fandom friends read soft focus or one of my one shots if they really wanted to? but i wouldn’t like. link them to my ao3 u know
What’s your favourite writing quote?
probably something like “fuck it”
Best and/or worst piece of feedback you’ve ever received.
best was probably someone saying they loved all my works and were going to make their way through all of them and also like every single comment i’ve gotten on soft focus
worst was probably when i first posted op fic and someone left a comment just to tell me i’d tagged my story wrong (when i didn’t)
Most random thing you’ve become an expert in, Because Research.
i sure know a lot about pregnancy for someone who never wants to have biological childreen
Favourite thing you’ve ever written.
hmgnhmghg
probably either soft focus or my first long term wip from my previous fandom, it was a messy time travel adventure and i had so much fun writing it
Would you ever collaborate with another author?
hell yeah, i used to collaborate A Ton with an old friend in another fandom and i write a lot with jill nowadays
Share an unpublished snippet. Go on, you know you want to!
Marco’s response came much faster than he expected it to.
Of course, don’t worry about it! Feel free to drop by whenever you’re ready, I just have to change out of my work clothes.
The phrase ‘work clothes’ brought back some memories from that morning that Ace didn’t quite care to recall, but he simply shoved those thoughts down before he went to his room to change his own clothes.
Favourite character(s)
Least favourite character(s)
we don’t hate characters here but sometimes i hate sanji a little bit
Character you’d most like to go for coffee with
i feel like robin would make good conversation
Character you’d turn to in a crisis
oh marco that bitch knows what’s going on
Character you’d trust your life with
am i allowed to say marco twice
Character you’d most like to share a house with
i’m gonna say robin again bc she’s Mature and Dependable
Character you’d go on a camping trip with
i h8 camping but i feel like ace could make it fun
Favourite canon friendship
hmmmm franky & robin maybe
Favourite canon pairing
we don’t rlly do that here but i’m also going to say franky & robin
Favourite non-canon friendship
hmmm i want law and chopper to be closer
Favourite non-canon pairing
ohgouhg
rn it’s acelaw
A minor character you have a disproportionate amount of thoughts and feelings about
THE YETI COOL BROTHERS
A character you recently got interested in
doflamingo maybe? and corazon but i’m kinda just avoiding him until i actually See him in canon
An under-appreciated character
robin 🥺
A character who haunts you
fucking spandam
A character you interpret unconventionally
probably law honestly, though i haven’t seem him too much in canon so i can’t say
A character who grew on you over time
oh franky i fucking hated him when he was first introduced
Have you ever gone off a character you used to love?
back in weeb phase no. 1 sanji was my fave and i still appreciate him but also i kinda wanna punch him
Which character is a secret romantic?
franky,,
Which character is tougher than they appear?
nami bc when i finally got to see her fight she rocked my world
Any favourite animal characters?
chopper Of Course
Pick a pair or group of characters unlikely to share a natural bond, and describe how they might become friends.
um hello ace and law bond over trauma, self loathing, and the existence of luffy
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Cold as Stone (Part 2)
Part 1
Summary: Having already lost one of their own, the sides decide to try and figure out what their next course of action should be.
Word count: 2310
Author’s note: thank you so much for the positive reaction to the first part! I hope you enjoy this part too! also, shout out to @mememic-bry for offering to beta this for me!! <3 warnings for: panic, petrification (being turned to stone), violence, blood
tag list: @mememic-bry @princelogical @super-magical-wizard @rileyfirstname @that-one-invisible-chick @silverglimse-productions @misslilidelaney @creativenostalgiastuff @hissesssss @akiraaria @prinxietyandchocolate @nyxwordsmith @justanotherpurplebutterfly @k9cat @hanramz-the-fander @logansanders33 @spottybob @specifiedshippinglover13 @miss-meg1710 @justanotherlemon @fillogree @timeywimeygalaxy @darkstarsigh @icecoldparadise
The remaining three sides stood silently for minutes after it happened, barely moving as if they all had been turned to stone. Logan was the first one to speak.
“Well, we’d best get started, shall we?” His throat was tight and he cleared it before speaking again. “Roman, what do you know about the dragon-witch? You’ve already clarified you aren’t aware of how to break this spell, but some background information would be beneficial.”
Roman could hardly believe how quick Logan got down to business, but in some ways he appreciated it. The sooner this was over, the better. “Umm. Well. She resides in those mountains up there,” he explained, pointing them out, “specifically on the highest peak of the tallest mountain.”
“Do you know of any weaknesses? Other abilities? Anything that might be useful to us?”
Roman was having a hard time focusing, but he wracked his brain anyway. “She... can breathe fire, of course…” He tried to think of what else she could do, but meeting resistance, he moved onto the next topic. “Her underbelly is weak. That’s usually where I strike her before she flees.”
Logan hummed. “I see. Do you suppose that defeating this dragon-witch would free Virgil?”
“I’m honestly not sure, but if that is what must be done, then I shall do it,” Roman said, now determined.
It was at that point he noticed Patton had been suspiciously quiet. He looked over to find Patton standing directly in front of Virgil’s statue, worry and grief etched in his face. He reached his hand up towards Virgil’s forehead as if to brush the hair out of his face, hesitating for a moment before he settled his hand on the side of Virgil’s face and pressed his forehead against Virgil’s. Roman couldn’t help but remember the dragon-witch’s words.
“It is not your role to protect them. You may try, but you will always fail.”
“Roman, are your injuries going to hinder you? If so, we can rest a while before we leave,” Logan inquired, adjusting his glasses.
Roman hadn’t even been thinking about his injuries. He felt tired and sore, but he wasn’t about to let that stop him. “They’re fine, but… maybe you two should stay here.”
Patton finally looked away from Virgil and fixed his eyes on Roman. “What do y’mean, kiddo? Of course we’re coming with you! We’ve gotta save Virgil!”
“I have to agree, I don’t think it would be wise for you to go alone,” Logan said firmly. “What if you also get turned to stone? We would be none the wiser if we waited down here.”
Roman opened his mouth to argue, but closed it again. He’d been so focused on the others he hadn’t even considered that possibility. What would happen if he was turned to stone? Seeing that Logan had a point, he huffed. “Fine. But neither of you had better get caught.”
“We can make no promises, but we will certainly try not to,” Logan agreed. “We should leave immediately, although I doubt we’ll make it up the entirety of the mountain today.”
Roman nodded in agreement, and Patton gave one final glance towards Virgil’s still form before the three of them departed.
They reached the foot of the mountain within an hour and began their climb up the worn path towards the summit. They barely spoke a word to each other for a long time, aside from Roman occasionally giving them directions. Roman could still remember a time when Virgil’s absence would have made him happy, but now guilt just twisted in his stomach.
They came to a small clearing just as the sun was setting and decided to make camp there. Logan made a fire while Roman conjured up some bedrolls for them to sleep on. Patton seemed distracted, just sitting and watching as the other two worked. Roman knew that under normal circumstances, Patton would have jumped at the opportunity to help either of them, but Roman also suspected he was taking Virgil’s condition the hardest out of all of them.
After the beds were all laid out, Roman took a seat beside him. He struggled to find the right words to say. “If you like, I could conjure up some marshmallows and we could roast them on the fire?”
Patton gave him a weak smile. “Thanks Roman, that’s nice of you, but I’m not feeling very hungry right now.”
“Oh.” Roman fidgeted with his sash. “Well, how about-”
“I think I’m gonna turn in for the night!” Patton said suddenly. He crawled over to one of the bedrolls and settled into it. “G’night guys!”
“Good night, Patton,” Logan returned, prodding the fire as he did so.
Roman’s mouth was left hanging open from Patton’s sudden interruption. “Ah… y-yes, sleep well, Patton,” he said awkwardly. He watched as Patton drew the blankets tightly around his form, breathing out a long sigh before he stilled. Roman covered his face with his hands, suddenly feeling very tired as well.
There was a long silence after that. Roman would occasionally look over at Logan, who was staring into the fire, deep in thought for what felt like forever. It seemed as though Patton wasn’t the only one taking this hard. Or perhaps Logan was just thinking about their situation; Logan was always hard to read.
“Roman, can I ask you a question about the dragon-witch?” Roman was drawn out of his own thoughts as Logan spoke. He saw Logan adjust his glasses. “She is a creation of your own making, correct? Is there no way for you to simply… make her vanish? I’m not as familiar with the workings of the imagination as I would like to be.”
Roman sighed. “It doesn’t quite work that way, Specs. Even if it did, I’m not sure it would reverse the spell on Virgil.”
“I see,” Logan said simply. “Another question: We’ve all witnessed you defeat a dragon-witch before, but I don’t recall her having the ability to turn people to stone. Is that… your doing?”
Roman laughed bitterly. “You’re implying it’s my fault?”
“Is it?”
Roman paused, staring down at his feet. “Possibly. I just wanted… I mean, you saw how easily I overcame that other dragon-witch, right? It was almost… too easy, and I may have… enhanced design slightly.” He could feel Logan’s stare on him. “But I never thought she would be of any danger to the rest of you,” he continued quickly. “That is the truth, Logan. I-I never meant for this to happen.”
Logan sighed. “I can hardly hold it against you for wanting to challenge yourself. I only hope we can correct this mistake.”
“I hope so, too,” Roman said quietly. Patton stirred in his sleep briefly before settling down again. Logan seemed to be drifting off as well now. He silently vowed wouldn’t let harm come to either of them.
The sides woke early the next morning and continued their trek up the mountain.
“If we continue at this pace, how long do you estimate it will take us to reach the peak, Roman?” Logan inquired.
Roman took a second to think - the campsite they’d departed from an hour ago lay about one-third up the mountain, so he tried to guess from that. “We might make it there by nightfall, but the path gets narrower and steeper up ahead, so that may slow us down.”
“Uh… guys?” Patton tried to speak up, but the other two sides didn’t hear him.
“If we take into consideration the height of the mountain, then we should also consider shapeshifting into warmer attire once we reach a high enough altitude,” Logan commented. Seasons weren’t as consistent in the imagination as they were in reality, but Roman had created all of the mountains so their tops would be covered in snow most of the year, if for no other reason than aesthetics.
A shadow passed over top of them, but only Patton noticed. “Hey Roman, I think-”
“Ah, I do always enjoy wearing a warm winter cloak!” Roman mused. The way it draped over his shoulders somehow made him feel more… heroic.
“Guys!” Patton called out desperately. The other two turned just as Patton tackled them to the ground. A loud roar rang in their ears and a whoosh of wind ruffled their hair. The dragon-witch had narrowly missed them. Patton kept his arms held tightly around both of them for a few seconds, before tentatively relaxing enough so that they could all push themselves to their feet.
“That was… too close for comfort,” Roman said, straightening out his clothes and brushing off the dirt. He exhaled and gave Patton a grateful look. “It’s a good thing one of us was paying attention. You really saved us there, Patton.” Roman couldn’t help but notice a few grazes on Patton’s arms. He made a mental note to help him patch them up later.
“Yes, it was a rather close call,” Logan agreed, appearing a little flustered. He picked his glasses up off the ground from where’d they’d been knocked off and slipped them back onto his face. “Thank you, Patton. Very quick thinking on your part.”
Patton beamed at them, but his smile quickly dropped when he glanced up. “Well, y-you two might wanna move out of the way before she comes back.”
A roar erupted through the air from behind Roman and Logan, and they didn’t need to be told twice before running for cover. Patton, on the other hand, hadn’t moved. Roman halted. “Patton, what are you doing?!”
Logan also stopped in his tracks. He frowned, as if trying to piece something together. “Patton.”
Patton gulped. “Yeah?”
“You looked, didn’t you?”
“U-um—” Patton didn’t get a chance to finish before the dragon-witch swooped down again. Logan and Roman managed to dive out of the way, but all Patton could do was yelp and try to crouch down. This proved to be difficult, seeing as his feet were now solid stone and couldn’t move. He covered his head and whimpered.
Roman felt his temper flare up. How could he have let this happen again? One thing was for sure though - he wasn’t about to let the dragon-witch get away.
Roman drew his sword and stood in front of Patton. The dragon-witch landed with a heavy thud, teeth bared and sharp. She prowled towards him, her body lowered as if she could strike at any second. Roman readied himself for the attack.
The dragon-witch suddenly lunged towards him, but Roman acted quickly. In one swift moment he dived underneath her and struck the underside of the dragon’s stomach.
The sound that followed was deafening.
Roman dropped his sword to cover his ears, squeezing his eyes shut from just how loud it was. By the time he opened them, he had no time to react before a set of long claws swiped across his stomach. He cried out in pain, clutching at the wound. He dropped to his knees. On some level he registered Logan and Patton shouting his name, and the sound of wings flapping and slowly fading away.
He lifted his arm briefly to examine the wound and hissed at the sight. There wasn’t as much blood as he’d expected, but it was still staining his white costume and his sash had been apart. He wasn’t sure if he could find the strength to stand up for a few moments, but then he remembered - Patton was still turning to stone. As he staggered to his feet, Logan came to his side and helped to hold him up.
“W-well, I think that could have gone better,” Roman said, trying to lighten the mood. He managed to half-smile at Patton, but Patton didn’t smile back.
“Roman, you’re bleeding!” Patton said, his voice filled with worry. “Are you going to be okay?”
“Ah, ‘tis but a flesh wound, Padre! Besides, what about you?” Roman tried to straighten himself up, wincing as pain shot through his torso.
Patton looked down. Half of him was already stone, his legs entirely covered. “O-oh, it doesn’t hurt or anything! Feels kinda funny though…” Roman could tell Patton was trying to be brave, but he couldn’t help but hear the tremble in his voice.
“Roman, your wound needs tending to,” Logan said, shifting his weight slightly.
Roman shook his head. “I’ll be fine, we should focus on Patton for now.”
“The process has already started, there’s nothing we can do for him.”
Roman opened his mouth to protest, but Patton spoke first. “He’s right, kiddo. You need to get that wound fixed up!”
Roman could do nothing as Logan set him gently on the ground and Patton continued to turn to stone before his eyes. It was frustrating. If there was anything Roman hated, it was feeling helpless. As Logan lifted Roman’s top off to get a better look at the wound, Roman’s pain and frustration manifested itself as tears welling up in his eyes.
“Roman?”
Roman looked up to see Patton staring down at him, with a soft expression he’d seen many times before when he’d been frustrated or sad or upset. “It’s going to be okay.”
Roman choked out a laugh. “How can you say that?”
“Because there’s still hope!” Patton said, smiling softly at him. “You and Logan’ll figure something out. I know you will. I believe in both of you.”
Roman and Logan exchanged a glance. Neither of them were very sure of that statement. Roman looked back up at Patton. The stone had almost reached his neck. Logan continued tending to Roman’s wound as Roman spoke. “I… we will try, Patton.”
Patton’s voice was shaky and his eyes glistened with tears. “I-I know. I love both of you. Take care of each other.”
Those were the last words he spoke before he completely turned to stone.
#my fic#sanders sides#roman sanders#logan sanders#patton sanders#not sure when the next part'll be up#i'm gonna do a bit of rewriting so it might be a while!#but in the meantime i hope you like this part!!
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Open Up When (Shalaska) Chapter 1 - Kayden
an: im back back back again nearly a month later with the first chapter WHOOPS tbh chapter length might drop bc like???? i wanna please the people ANYWAY here yall go
The letter felt heavy between the blonde’s fingers. Even though she had only opened the envelope a few seconds beforehand, it seemed as if she had been curled up in that position for years. Just reading Sharon’s handwriting. By reading Sharon’s handwriting, Alaska meant that she had only read the “Dear Alaska”. Her eyes traced over each stroke of the letters. She could imagine Sharon hunched over a desk, chewing her pen before falling back in her desk chair and groaning loudly. That was what Sharon would do. There she was, scratching her way back into Alaska’s thoughts. The girl let out a sigh. It was too late now to back out. She traced one slim finger down the edge of the paper and began reading.
“Dear Alaska,
You’ve opened this because you’re sad and I’m not there. Obviously.”
“Ah fuck.” She muttered. She’d forgotten what was on the front of the envelope. The part that would reveal what the letter would contain. The most important past of the damn thing. She was so interested in the contents that she immediately turned it over and used one acrylic nail to rip it open. Man, she really was a psycho ex girlfriend. Whatever, it was open now.
“I’m so sorry I can’t be there to comfort you baby. I really am. You know it makes me sad when you’re sad. I hope I can return to you soon with all of your favourite foods and make you feel better again.”
The words felt bitter on the blonde’s tongue. Alaska wanted her favourite foods. She wanted to cuddle up on the couch and watch shitty daytime television. She wanted- No, she needed Sharon to comfort her. She could’ve if she wasn’t the one destroying Alaska’s heart and mind. Alaska shook off the thought and continued reading.
“Since I can’t let you cry into my shoulder and pull my hair into styles I can’t pronounce the names of, I decided to list some of my favourite memories and I’m praying to some non-existent god that they cheer you up. I swear I’ll be there for you soon”
Alaska let out a small chuckle. Well, at least it seemed like one. She enjoyed Sharon’s twisted sense of humour. She missed it. Her fingers wiped away a tear that was threatening to escape. The blonde was going to try not to cry millions of tears by the end of the letter.
“Firstly, remember the first time I said I loved you back? The time we nearly got kicked out of a department store? I still can’t believe you did it. You broke down my walls.”
Of course Alaska remembered. It was the first time that Sharon actually said those words to her. She leaned back against the end of her bed as she recalled that eventful day.
May 12th, 12.04pm
Alaska pulled her hair back into a messy ponytail as she glanced through what to wear on her date with Sharon. Even though they had been going out for four and a half months already, they hadn’t done two things. One, they hadn’t come out as dating. It was obvious as to why. If Alaska, co-head cheerleader and part of the popular group, came out as gay, she would be horrendously bullied. If she was exposed as being gay AND dating the punk rule breaker Sharon? Her name would be plastered over every bathroom stall. Sharon was used to it but she couldn’t bear to see Alaska’s reputation destroyed. The other thing was that they both hadn’t said ‘I love you" yet. The blonde had, multiple times. Whether it was a playful side comment while they were laughing over cups of tea or the more serious times, those words always seemed to be uttered by Alaska. Was she slightly disappointed? Yes. However she was fully aware that Sharon wasn’t as trusting in relationships and that it was hard for her to open up. She needed to respect that.
The blonde pulled out a pleated skirt. It was a pastel pink and came to a little bit above the knee on the cheerleaders long lanky legs. It was perfect for any date. That reminded her, where was Sharon even taking her? She pulled out her phone and began typing out a quick message.
To: Noodles❤️:
can i at least have a hint as to where you’re taking me ??? >:(
From: Noodles❤️:
No, you may not.
A frown crossed the girl’s face. She had never liked surprises. Her mother had thrown her a surprise party for her 12th birthday and she had a horrible panic attack. The girl let out a small prayer that history wouldn’t repeat itself. She couldn’t let Sharon know about her anxiety. Sharon already opened up to Alaska about her past and how it fucked her up. Alaska needed to be the strong one in the relationship.
She slid her skirt up her thighs and adjusted it, turning to look in the mirror. The skirt was cute, but not with her oversized top that she wore to sleep. She took another look in her closet. After a few seconds of searching, She found a basic black singlet top that she could wear her favourite sweater on top of. She changed her clothing, tossing her pyjama shirt in the laundry basket and struck a pose in the mirror. Man, this outfit was adorable. She blew herself a kiss and pulled her hair out of the ponytail it was in. Light blonde locks fell over her back. Using her slim fingers, she shook it a little to let the hair fall more naturally before moving over to her drawers to find a hair brush. Something was off however. She was scrambling to find the brush in silence. After putting on some love song playlist, she continued to look.
When her quest for the hairbrush was over, she let the bristle slip through her sun kissed locks, letting it untangle every knot. After allowing her brush to do its main purpose, she began to use it as a microphone, badly screaming the lyrics to some bad quality 90’s ballad. She twirled around her room, the edges of her skirt lifting upwards to expose more of her lightly tanned thighs. Her lips parted to reveal a toothy smile as she sat down in front of her vanity, still singing the song, this time quieter and with more of a melody than her earlier screaming. She pulled open a drawer to reveal palettes upon palettes of makeup. After going through all her drawers and picking out the makeup she would wear, she decided to send Sharon another text.
To: Noodles❤️:
just starting my makeup now xx how are you going ??
No response just yet. She expected that from Sharon. With her it was respond anywhere from three seconds to three weeks later. She placed her phone down and began to apply her foundation. It was a small while later that her phone vibrated, when she had just begun to apply eyeshadow. The blonde jumped, nearly ruining the entire look.
From: Noodles❤️:
Haven’t left bed yet. x
The blonde let out an eye roll and a small chuckle. She was still so confused as to how her girlfriend always looked stunning whenever she saw her even when she was wearing the same clothes that she had for the past week and her hair was a complete mess. Alaska finished up her eyeliner, the small flicks at the end not being completely straight, but then again, neither was she. After finishing up her full look with a touch of mascara, she headed downstairs to put on some sneakers and to deal with her mother.
As she tied her laces, her mother came into the room. Alaska’s mom wasn’t much shorter than her, and had aged well. Her hair was dry from re-bleaching it all these years. She wore clothing that was vaguely bohemian but still had a very strong ‘mom’ feel to it. She took a step closer to her daughter and began to speak.
“When am I going to meet this boyfriend of yours? He seems like such a sweetheart, taking you on all these dates and things. Much more romantic than your father. Will I be meeting him soon? How about I walk you out and come meet him?” She smiled. The younger blonde put her hands up.
“That won’t be necessary, okay? You’ll meet them eventually.” She put her bag over one shoulder and headed out, giving a small wave to her mother before slamming the door.
To: Noodles❤️:
hey im at the end of the drive waiting
To: Noodles❤️:
just had more questions from my mother
To: Noodles❤️:
she wants to meet u badly yikes
Alaska sighed into the cool air, letting the wind realign where her hair sat on her shoulders. She lightly rubbed one arm and leaned out in time to see Sharon’s car turn the corner. The entire car looked like it was going to fall apart any minute. The pain was chipping and dents decorated every side. On the contrary, Sharon was looking like a million dollars. Perhaps it was the bias that Alaska had due to her being absolutely head over heels in love with the goth. She grinned and waved as the girl pulled up on the curb and rolled down her window.
“Babe, if I knew you were going to dress up this well, I would’ve planned something fancier.” Sharon chuckled.
Alaska rolled her eyes and got into the car, closing the door behind her. “This is really nothing, I swear. Where are you taking me anyways?” The blonde fastened her seatbelt and leaned over to plant a quick kiss on her girlfriend’s cheek. Sharon awkwardly smiled. “C'mon, it won’t be that bad, will it?” Alaska pouted slightly and placed one hand onto the shorter girl’s thigh. “Will it?”
Sharon nervously laughed. She had been shocked by how gorgeous Alaska had looked and suddenly felt guilty about not taking her girlfriend on the trip she deserved. Her eyes became fixated on Alaska’s facial features. She became so focused on all the tiny details that made the blonde look like a goddess that she didn’t realise that she had been asked a question.
“Hm? I’m sorry I just-” Sharon shook her head and rubbed her eyes slightly, “got a little distracted. What was it you were saying?” She attempted to laugh and shrug it off that she just got lost in Alaska’s beauty but she could tell by the blonde’s sudden outburst of giggling that it hadn’t worked.
tags- open up when, kayden, shalaska, sharon needles, alaska,
“Don’t worry about it, I’ll find out the answers soon” She managed to get out through laughter.
The first half of the car ride was smooth, filled with small talk and large periods where Alaska would just admire her girlfriend. Around the middle of the car ride is when the anxiety started. What if the reason Sharon hadn’t said she loved Alaska yet was because she didn’t? What if she was going to leave Alaska in the middle of the woods? What if Sharon was only dating her to get rid of her? The blonde could feel her breathing get quicker and she fiddled with the folds in her skirt. What was it that her councillor told her to do? Alaska racked her mind for the answer.
It came to her after about a minute of quietly panicking. Best scenario, Worst scenario, Most likely scenario. Best scenario? Sharon took her down to the dock and married her right then and there. They’d both escape to New York and raise two cats. Alaska grinned at the idea of it. Worst? Sharon ditched her in a forest and tied her up to a tree and let her be eaten by woodland creatures. Why wouldn’t have Sharon done it earlier in the relationship though? Realising that it was unrealistic, Alaska could feel her heartbeat settle as well as her breathing. What would most likely happen? They’d go on a date like they had done for the past couple months. Now calmer, Alaska began to drift off in her car seat.
May 12th, 1:47pm
As they pulled into the parking lot, Alaska woke up, batting her eyelashes and stretching as much as possible given the confined space she was in. Her eyes still plagued with sleep, she looked out the window to see where her date would take place. The image that laid in front of her was… Kmart. She turned quickly around and gave Sharon a questioning look, not sure if this was the final destination or not.
“Sorry it’s not quite what you expected” Sharon rubbed the back of her neck and averted eye contact, assuming she had let down her date.
Alaska ran a hand over Sharon’s thigh, her fingers meeting skin where the rips in her jeans were. “It’s absolutely perfect”
They walked across the parking lot, fingers interlocked. As they reached the door, Sharon pulled her hand away. Alaska frowned slightly but knew it was for protection. If someone they knew was there, it would be easier for Sharon to duck away if Alaska wasn’t touching her. Or if homophobes approached they could claim to be just friends. Overall, safety was more important right now.
They made their way into the store. It was much smaller than Alaska remembered but the last time she had gone she was much younger. She wanted to see how it had changed so she grasped onto Sharon’s hand (after checking for any people who would possibly see) and began searching.
Alaska ran down through the aisles, dragging her girlfriend behind her. Even though Sharon was about to completely fall over onto her face, she was happy. Alaska turned slightly to check on her girlfriend every now and then to make sure she was keeping up. They had made it to around halfway when Alaska came to a quick halt, causing the slightly shorter girl to completely fall over due to not gaining balance back quickly enough. Sharon laughed whilst the cheerleader desperately tried to check if she was injured.
“Angel, I’m fine” she reassured the vaguely panicked girl.
“Are you sure? I’m used to falls like that because of cheerleading but you won’t be so you might be really badly injured and I know first aid!” She rambled before realising that people were looking over very concerned. “She’s fine! She’s ok! I’m just overreacting!” She nervously giggled and tried to use her hair to hide her now blushing face. Sharon chuckled as she looked at the woman who had come over, worried about them. She looked to be in her 50’s and wore clothing that made her seem like she was much older. The woman smiled at the blonde and turned her head to look at the girl on the ground. Her brow furrowed and the corners of her lips turned downwards.
“You there, in the black. You look like a faggot dressing like that!” She pointed at Sharon. Alaska balled her fist and prepared for a fight but relaxed when she made eye contact with Sharon and realised she had it under control.
Sharon finally got off the ground after the slur was shouted and stood there calmly, giving a small nod to her girlfriend when she realised that she was about to throw some hands.
“You know what?” She began, taking a small step towards the woman and saw Alaska step behind her out of her peripheral view.
“I dress like this because I am a faggot. I’m a major flaming homosexual. I love holding hands with girls, I love taking girls on dates and I absolutely love eating girls out. Especially good girls. You think they’re all nice and pretty and will never stray away from faith and you’re wrong. They quiver under my fingertips. I pleasure girls way better than your husband has ever pleasured you. You hear that? I’m a goddess in the sheets. A fucking goddess. Don’t try and tell me I’m going to hell. I know I am. However, telling by your age, you’re going to get there before me. So be a darling and save me a seat, won’t you?”
Alaska wanted to go over and kiss her right then and there but didn’t. She didn’t know why she decided against it, but she did. After the woman had stormed off, she ran into Sharon’s arms, draping her own arms around her girlfriend’s neck. “That was… fucking amazing” She leaned closer in, resting her head on Sharon’s collarbone.
“Yeah it was,” Sharon paused “But we should leave before we get thrown out, don’t want to damage my little angels reputation.”
Alaska pulled away from the hug, rolling her eyes.
“You know I’d ruin it for you.”
May 12th, 2:28pm
After purchasing drinks, the girls decided to wander around the parking lot for a little while. The day had quietened slightly and the two girls walked side by side. Alaska appreciated the fact that most of the bustling people had stopped. Now only two noises lingered in Alaska’s mind; Sharon’s footsteps and the breaths that escaped both of them. She turned her head to smile at her girlfriend and discovered that Sharon had been looking at her the whole time they had been walking.
“What’cha thinking about?” Alaska let the words bounce off her tongue and escape through cherry coated lips.
“How much I love yo- Oh fuck.” Sharon began to splutter and panic, “I didn’t mean it, I mean I do but” She was shut up by the feeling of a finger pressing against her lips.
“It’s ok, I understand.” Alaska pulled her slim hand back towards her. The shorter girl shook her head.
“You really don’t understand. You don’t understand at all. Whenever I look at you the entire world and all the stars realign. Whenever you smile all colour comes back to my world. Whenever we kiss I can taste happiness and I haven’t tasted that since… forever ago. Everyday I wake up wondering how you’ve stayed with a freak like me. When you said yes to me asking you out, I went home and woke up the next day wanting to get out of bed. You’ve made me want to live again. So you really don’t understand how much I love you. I really do love you. I used to be so afraid of saying that. I thought you would hate me or that I’d end up being wrong about it. I know now that I’m desperately head over heels for you. You make me so fucking happy. God, if there even is one, I’m so fucking in love with you.”
That’s when Alaska realised. She, head cheerleader and one of the popular girls, had fallen completely for Sharon. The same Sharon who skipped class to smoke and played the bass guitar and flipped off teachers and had absolutely gorgeous hair and eyes and- Oh fuck. She really did love Sharon didn’t she?
The blonde grabbed her girlfriend’s hand and raced back to Sharon’s run down piece of metal she called a car. They both jumped in, this time to the back seat. No longer caring who saw them, the girls both became entangled. If a passerby were to look in, they wouldn’t be able to tell where Alaska stopped and Sharon began. When their lips weren’t touching, they were intensely staring at each other.
That’s when it all faded back to black
Present Day
Alaska moved one her hands from the paper to her face. Hot and wet. She wiped some of her tears away. Reading the entire letter would take forever if she continued to have full blown flashbacks like this. She needed to figure out why Sharon had left her and she needed to know soon. But I mean, it wouldn’t be THAT harmful to finish that letter first before moving onto the letters that she knew would make her upset at everything. Alaska stood up and looked out the window. It was dark. Really dark. She knew she couldn’t continue reading right now, she needed rest.
Alaska changed into a new shirt for the first time in a week, glad that she had finally cleaned up the closet. She lay down and decided to check her phone to see if anyone had messaged her. Turns out there were three messages.
From: Willam the Pig:
cant wait to see ur ass tomorrow u missed so much holy fuck
From: Courtney 🐨:
Looking forward to finally catching up tomorrow!!! I’ve missed you so much!!! : )
From: Russian Doll:
If ur not coming tomorrow im gonna eat ur son and also u
The blonde let out a huge sigh, realising she had to go back tomorrow and see everyone. All the teachers already hated her for talking during class but she’d have to do a whole lot more talking tomorrow to find out everything that happened. Knowing her school, the drama would be intense. Last time she was away for a week she came back to Alyssa starting drama with everyone and she meant everyone.
Most importantly, Sharon would be there. Does she remember the letters? Does she care? Should she get her clothes back tomorrow? Would she show up to cheerleading practice? What about science class?
Alaska would have to think it all over in the morning.
#please remember your tags!#kayden#shalaska#sharon needles#alaska thunderfuck#rpdr fanfiction#submission#open up when#lesbian au
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me, holding a pile of shit: i maked this.
apparently someone actually cared about my fraybane oneshot? so here we go,,, its probably nothing you guys expected but.... i thrive off validation... so pls tell me what you think..... and if u got any fraybane content tag it or tag me ill read it....
also to avoid any further misunderstandings (shout out to @baneseelie) fraybane is a BROTP, my fic is on their BROTP, and i love my babies v v v much
There was blood on his hands, but no matter how hard he washed, how fast he rubbed them, not a single droplet fell on the sink. He could feel the smell of it clinging to his skin, could feel the weight of the live he most likely just took away heaving on his back.
It wasn’t the first time Magnus had all but killed someone, but this time it was different. This time it really felt like he had been yielding a sword against someone’s throat and that he had been the one to swing it.
All he had known was that Raphael needed him, that the vampires needed him to take her down. His family needed her gone, and he had aided them.
And now she- Camille Belcourt- was gone., and it was on Magnus. Her death, her pain, her torture… it was all on Magnus. The Clave might kill her, but it had been Magnus who signed her death sentence.
“Magnus?”
The familiar voice somehow reached him through the sound of the water and his own thoughts, and he latched to it like a life saver. He shook his head at his reflection and smiling brightly as he left the bathroom, opening the door with a single snap of his fingers.
He had expected it to be Lily complaining about Raphael, maybe Izzy- he really was not ready for Clary Fray, standing at the door with visible gashes on her naked arms and her hair plastered all over her face because of the heavy rain.
She blinked at him for a second, and crossed her arms around her chest, shaking a little in the doorway. “Simon said something along the lines of you being a dad and a shadow doctor, and I forgot my stele at the Institute.”
Magnus didn’t answer at that just stepped out of the doorway, a silent invitation to come in.
All he knew was that Clary was hurting and he needed to be there for her.
The first thought Magnus had when he met Clary Fray for the first time was something along the lines of ‘why does Valentine’s daughter look adorable even though her father is a monster and I, a good warlock, can’t even have children?’
Not very flattering for either of the two women standing at the door, but honest. He probably would have smacked the door in their faces too, if it hadn’t been for Clary. Yes, Jocelyn Fairchild didn’t deserve his empathy, but what had the little girl done, except being born? She hadn’t asked for it.
So against his better judgement, he had allowed the two shadowhunters to come into his house and had listened to Jocelyn beggings and pleas, ready to refuse her. Ready to make her leave with nothing, the way her and the Circle had left many Downworlders and families with nothing too.
But then Clary had spoken, saying the first words since she had come in through the door with her mother.
“You have eyes like a cat.” Both Magnus and Jocelyn had looked at her at that, sitting in the corner of a soft sofa with a plushie in her hands and a thumb in her mouth. She had smiled at Magnus, with the innocence only children had. “I really really like them, Doctor Bane.”
Simple words, spoken by a child who was as much of a victim as him in a way, that had him smile honestly for the first time in years.
“These are some nasty scratches.” Commented Magnus, almost touching the scars, but stopping himself just in time.
Clary shrugged a little, refusing to meet his eyes, and Magnus sighed. She had been mostly quiet throughout it all, not really telling him anything and he was starting to get worried. Something serious had happened and he wanted to know what was it.
“How did you do it? How did you let go of Camille?”
It shouldn’t surprise him the fact that she knew. Of course Simon had told her. No, what surprised him was the fact that she cared at all about the person she blamed for Simon becoming a vampire.
He concentrated on the bandage he was applying on her arm for a few moments, choosing his words carefully. “I don’t know if I let go.” He answered in the end. He looked up at her with a small smile, talking as he finished the bandage. “I did it for Raphael, you see. And for Simon and the vampires, and I feel like it was the right thing to do. She made mistakes, and in a way, she deserved it.
But she wasn’t meant to die. Not now, not this soon. She was supposed to live forever. Even if everyone left, I always knew I’d have her. She hasn’t been my lover in decades, but she has always been my companion, dare I say, my friend.”
“But she did bad things. She hurt you. You should hate her, right?” asked him Clary, her fingers curling tightly around the arm of the chair.
“There is a thin line between love and hate, biscuit. And for that, I will never hate Camille Belcourt.” He let go of the bandage and held her hands in his. “And the only person I know that you might feel resentment towards but not fully hate, is your mother.” Clary blinked quickly, a small tear still rolling down her cheek. Magnus didn’t wipe it away.
“What happened, Clarissa?”
“Mister Magnus, did I make this?” asked Clary, frowning at the small painting framed on the wall in the living room. It definitely looked like her style, but she didn’t recall ever drawing it, let alone Magnus hanging it up.
The warlock looked up from where he was brewing his new potion, and shrugged. “… depends? If I can keep it then yes, if you want it back then no, it’s mine.” He answered, grinning at her.
Instead of answering him, Clary gasped, pointing her paint brush at his face. “Where did the glitter go?” she asked, looking at him in totally genuine shock.
Magnus would have laughed if she hadn’t been so completely serious. He snorted. “Contrarily to popular belief, I don’t wake up flawless. I am not Queen Bey.”
“Can I make you sparkly then?” she asked, and this time Magnus stopped, looking at her in surprise. She looked down at her feet. “You always say you like my art, so… can I make art with your face? Even though you’re already very beautiful?”
Simple question of a simple child. And yet, it was in that moment that Magnus decided that he would never let anything happen to Clary Fray. It was in that moment that he realised he would do anything to keep that baby safe.
“There is this room,” started Magnus, looking away from Clary, “that I made when you were younger.”
“You mean when m- mom came to wipe my memories?” asked the younger girl, tripping over the word mom. Magnus could relate.
“It was your room.” He explained, smiling at her confused expression. “I called it your ideas room. You drew all over the walls, on the carpets, everywhere. And every drawing you did, I hung it in that room. Pictures that I have of you and your mother, and Luke. They’re all in there.”
Clary stared at him for a couple of seconds, standing up on her feet. “Why did you keep them?” she asked him, a hand going to her bandaged arms for a moment.
Magnus just held out his hand for her. “Because I care for you.”
And you were an important part of my life. Because you are the sun, Clary, and you shone through my life with your kindness and your innocence, so rare in a Shadowhunter.
Because for many years, I thought of you as my younger sister, as someone I looked after.
Because you’re special.
“Like you care for Alec?” asked Clary and this time Magnus snorted.
“Like Izzy cares for Alec.” He corrected, and she relaxed at this.
“Show me.”
It’s been months since the last time Magnus saw her. Months since she last drew in her art room. Months since he took every last memory she had of him and the shadow world and erased it for ever.
And now Clary Fray was standing in front of him, every bit the woman he had watched her grow into, standing next to some shadowhunters like a queen reclaiming her throne.
“Clary Fairchild. You've grown into a beautiful young woman.” Its all he can say. He knows it’s foolish, because his magic is powerful. But he wants her to remember. He wants her to know him again.
But of course she doesn’t. Magnus is the best warlock in the entire Brooklyn.
“Magnus Bane. So you’re the one who took my memories.”
And like this, his heart breaks.
Clary stands in the middle of the room, watching everything with rapt eyes and unshed tears, and Magnus wants to comfort her, wants to reach out for her. But he can’t and it hurts more than it should.
“Do you want to be left alone?” asked Magnus, ready to leave the room. Clary wasn’t crying anymore anyway, and she seemed tired as she laid on the huge pouf in the room. But at his words she jerked up on her feet, shaking her head.
“No. Please.”
I don’t know why I care so much for someone I don’t even know.
You are important to me.
I need a friend.
Please?
“Stay with me. Until I fall asleep?” she asked, her nails digging into her own palms again.
Magnus nodded, holding onto her hand like she did with him when Alec had woken up the other day. “I’ll stay with you. Until you need me.”
“I don’t know what relationship we had before,” started Clary, settling back down on the pouf without letting go of Magnus. “And I don’t remember it. But I missed you, Magnus.”
The older man smiled, the weight of his years and memories suddenly feeling lighter than they had in years. “I never left.”
#fraybane#magnus bane#clary fray#clagnus#clary fairchild#i hate the ship name clagnus#heterophobicmalecnet#shadowhunters#my fic#salma writes
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