#if you notice im a bit absent from time to time
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krosiefics · 2 days ago
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never sleeps • bang chan
MDNI 18+
Synopsis: Chan stays late at the studio so you decide to attempt to drag him back home. Little did you know that you would end up sleeping at the studio after a little fun time.
WC: 1k
Tags: smut, mdni, piv, pretty girl, idolbf!bangchan, afab!reader, softdom-ish!chan, unprotected sex (just don’t), pwp, praise kink, aftercare, pretty vanilla compared to what I’ve done before, inspired by railway ofc, bigdick!chan, chan is a workaholic fr, this is also an apology for being absent during this school semester
a/n: im not ok after the railway mv…i died. Also…IM BACK BITCHESSSSS, uni’s done for the semester, i will unfortunately be out from mid jan- may…but then im back for the summer 😌
“Babe?” You call out as you walk into your boyfriend’s studio. He had sent you a message a bit ago saying that he would be home later, but it’s already two in the morning. So you decided to drag yourself out of bed so that you can drag him back home so he can go to bed.
The lights are all off except a small desk lamp that sits nexts to the desktop. Chan sits in front of the desktop, headphones over ears, as he stares tiredly at the screen. You stride up to him, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. Chan slightly jumps at the sudden contract. “Hey, what’re you doing here?”
“I could ask you the same thing? C’mon babe, let’s go home.” You tug at the collar of his blazer. Chan had mentioned to you in the morning that he had an important meeting today with the company, so he had to dress up nicely. So instead of his usual black hoodie, he wore a black blazer with matching slacks. Chan chuckles, tilting his head to your hand that rests on his shoulder. “In a bit. Just gotta finish this little bit of the track.” You sigh, plopping yourself down on the sofa by the wall.
You try to keep yourself awake, but given that it’s so late, your eyes betray you as they flutter shut within minutes. By three in the morning Chan finally takes off his headset. He turns around in his chair to be met with your sleeping figure. He smiles to himself, rolling towards you and leaving a kiss on your forehead.
You whine, your nose scrunching up as you stir awake. “Channie, can we go home now?” Your eyes plead. Chan’s eyes watch the way you peer up at him, “You’re so pretty- oh.” He starts before noticing what you’re wearing, it’s his hoodie. His fingers twirl around the drawstring before trailing up and cupping your cheek in his warm hand. “Why’re you wearing this love?”
“Smells like you.”
Chan smiles fondly down at you, leaning in and placing a kiss on your lips. Your arms wrap around his neck. Your hands tugging at the curls at the nape of his neck. You pull him down onto you and he quickly obliges, caging you under his firm body. You stare up at him with eager eyes. He is quick to recognize your desire. “Baby, you sure you didn’t come here for something else.” Your face flushes.
“Like what?” You tease, a smile pressed against his lips. Chan chuckles against your mouth as his hands roam your sides. You arch into his body as his hands trail lower and lower. “You’re a tease, you know that.” Chan smirks, attaching his lips to your neck, suckling and nibbling at your skin.
“Ah, Channie.” You grunt, the grip on his hair tightening. He hums against your neck in a questioning manner, as if he didn’t know what he was currently. Before you knew it, the two of you were grinding against each other at three in the morning. Your exhaust going right out the window as you feel your throbbing cunt clench around nothing. “More…please.” You whine, your hands frantically trying to unbutton his slacks.
Chan watches in amusement as you manage to free him of his slacks, pulling out his pulsing cock from his boxers. “Is my pretty girl needy?” You groan at the pet name, but you could care less about making a snarky remark, you just need him in you. Now. So you simply nod, whimpering when his hands slip down the front of your pajama shorts. His fingers teasing at your clit.
His fingers work their way in and out of you, smearing your wetness along your folds. “Chan,” You moan quietly. “There’s no one here love,” he leans down and pecks your cheek, “you can be as loud as you want.” You impatiently pump his cock, guiding him towards your entrance. “I swear to God if you don’t fuck me right now.” You huff out. Chan shakes his head at you with an amused smile before ramming his cock inside of you.
The moan you let out is so erotic you couldn’t even believe that you could make that sound. Chan obviously liked it cause you could feel him twitch inside you. “Shit baby, you’re squeezing me so well.” Chan bites his lower lips as his eyes fixate where you two are connected. Your legs hook around his waist as he drills into you. Your hands go to his blazer and you start unbuttoning it, revealing his tones and underneath. ‘Why the fuck isn’t he wearing a shirt?’ You thought to yourself, but they’re erased as Chan hits your g-spot dead on.
Chan rids himself of the article, his pace never faltering. “Hold onto me baby, it’s okay.” He grunts lowly, burying his face into your neck. Your hands fly to grab into his back as the feeling of his cock pounding into you over and over drove you over the edge. His groans began pitching as his hips faltered. “Fuck I’m close baby.” His lips leave love marks along your neck and as far down as your his hoodie would allow him to go.
As Chan spills over the edge, his teeth dig in slightly causing you to finally tip over. Your legs shake around him as he eases himself out of you slowly. He leaves you to rest on the sofa as he cleans up himself and your body. Finally, he gently nudges you over, making room for him to sit down on the sofa with you. Chan places your head in his lap, leaving a small kiss on your forehead. “Thanks for visiting me.” He smirks, you roll your eyes playfully at him. “Sure, you never sleep so I just tried something new.” He nods in approval, “Well you should try your ‘new’ method more often.” He yawns before cuddling you to sleep once more.
@katsukis1wife @pixie0627
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natolesims · 1 year ago
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I'm moving!! 🏡
The other day I was thinking on how little I share about myself in here because I think I might annoy people but you know what? Sometimes I do want to ramble a bit so bear with moi.
And yes, I'm moving out at last! My now fiancée and I have been apartment hunting for a while now, but last week my in-law offered us a house she has for rent in our city. We'll move in late-January and I'm so excited and terrified and exhausted and happy and- I'm on a crisis. A good crisis, I think.
My parents don't know yet and they won't react well (they don't want me to move out and it's a big issue we've had for a long time now), but it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. Send help.
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myunghology · 1 year ago
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twisted wonderland 2nd years, except they're helplessly in love.
pairings ; riddle, ruggie, azul, jade, floyd, kalim, jamil, silver x gn! reader. (seperate).
tw ; none.. unless it's a bit too cheesy..?
a/n ; my first twst work.. im terrified!!
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☆ — RiDDLE ROSEHEARTS
nope. will not allow it. he has his priority- which is his grades. he won't allow himself to be distracted by you. (more below the cut!)
but you are gorgeous tho, he'll admit that.
oh, would you look at that.. he's been distracted.
other students, even students outside heartslabyul are getting a bit weirded out, like what do you mean he's stopping in his tracks just to watch you pass by.
doesn't even notice it himself that he's staring at you. it's about time he notices that he'd stopped walking is when floyd smacked his head..
well, to be fair, he's noticed himself that he gets nervous whenever he invites you to unbirthday parties, he feels like everything has to be perfect.
—which is why some heartslabyul students are kinda annoyed when you come. only because they have to do so much with riddle pressuring them every 10 minutes. they like you generally though!
plus riddle seems more relaxed when you're around. that's just a bonus though! (is it really)
cater has multiple pictures of riddle just staring at you— his gaze softening whenever his eyes land on you instinctively.
he offers to hold open the door for you whenever you run into each other outside the classrooms, he offers to help you whenever you ever get injured playing some sport, and he even let's you borrow his notes if you were absent in class for a good reason.
sure, maybe he might be a bit arrogant, and a bit of a cry baby, and definitely strict— but he has respect for everyone. especially you.
riddle rosehearts is truly, a gentleman in a world full of boys.
☆ — RUGGiE BUCCHi
him? in love? absolutely.
if ruggie was in love, it'll probably be obvious. he tries to hide it though,, but it's clear he isn't good at that.
he's pretty chill around you though, nothing too awkward.
let me tell you this, whenever you ask him for a request, he'll want something back. no, he isn't gonna ask for a kiss or a date. stop imagining that.
he wants you to pay him back by a favor, so that he can pull the "you owe me a favor, since i did ___ for you." card.
okay maybe then he'll ask you on a date. or he'll ask you to steal something from a student.
what can i say.. it's 50/50.. slowly leaning onto the date idea though.
ruggie isn't oblivious, or stupid either. he knows when he's in love. he's just too afraid to admit it. sometimes leona makes fun of him for being a "wimp" and to just confess.
also stares at you, but in class this time. bro isn't listening at all actually because he's too busy looking at you.
maybe i will admit that ruggie is a little shit but he's actually a sweetheart when he wants to be. it's a win/win situation if you like annoying guys but has a soft spot for you.
spoiler: he eventually sucks it tf up and soon confesses.
☆ — AZUL ASHENGROTTO
azul may be a tad bit conscious about what you think about him. screw that- he's definitely conscious about what you think about him. from not only about what happened during his overblot and from his insecurities.
he knows you aren't that type of person, but he can't help it.
it makes him feel a million times better when you reassure him though. even if it's making him a bit delusional.. but then again you might be saying that just because you pity him.
"or maybe they're just nice and they actually care have you ever thought of that" - floyd
you go to monstro lounge about once a week, and for sure, azul has sent jade and floyd to take care of you well, since of couse, most of the time he's busy.
floyd almost exposed azul's crush on you once when you two were chatting, thankfully jade was there to cover his mouth before he continued speaking.
but when he is actually there face to face actually talking to you, he sounds smug but in reality, he's a nervous wreck in the inside. you obviously know that though.
wait till you tell him that you find him cute..
he explodes
no i'm joking, he's just blushing really hard. like.. too much. again- it's kinda obvious that he likes you whenever you compliment him.
☆ — JADE LEECH
so, so respectful when talking to you. still a bit teasing though. he offers to help you even if you're carrying just one thing.
always glad to see you when you're visiting monstro lounge, floyd loves you just as much, but in a platonic way! he isn't going to steal jades version of his 'shirmpy'.
tried to make a drink thats named by you, azul didn't allow it, unfortunately. (for him). i'd be embarrassed tbh.
in your opinion jade is a bit weird.. but he's still super nice to you, no matter how weird this guy seems. he would never do anything that would make you uncomfortable.
similar to riddle- he opens doors for you, sometimes offers to cook for you, and sometimes treats you whenever you're at montro lounge. only if azul allows it though, which is pretty rare. like jade wtf dym "its on the house" no it's not shut up.
you sometimes wonder if his mushrooms are safe to eat or not.
it's probably best not to ask him though.
he may or may have not tried breaking into your dorm room because you weren't attending class and you weren't responding to his messages asking where you were. it was all on concern tho don't worry i swe-
genuinely doesn't have a problem with confessing, but he only confesses until he's confident that you like him back.
trigger warning for floyd though since he's probably gonna pop out anytime soon during the confession..
☆ — FLOYD LEECH
my condolences if he ever likes you.
just kidding, it'd be pretty fun if floyd started to like you. only if you really like his bone crushing hugs.
doesn't hide his crush on you at all, you gotta be super oblivious if you don't notice it if he didn't even confess to you yet the moment he finds out that he likes you.
you're definitely scared shitless whenever you see him. when you try to run away he chases you around the halls and he's so damn fast, it's nearly impossible to escape him.
plus- his mood swings too? who knows if he'll get excited when you run away from him or if he's gonna get pissed off.. but mostly he gets excited though.
has kabedoned you one, too many times. mostly to fluster you, but also to get your attention.
easily gets jealous- especially when someone else hugs you for a long time. no one can hug his shrimpy except him! he isn't possessive, that's just how floyd is.
also stares at you in class- but throws paper airplanes at you, with the writings inside saying "HI".
ends up getting in trouble because either he got caught, or riddle snitched. most likely the second one tho.
drags you to monstro lounge to help him clean up his OWN messes, but he (might) have intentionally done this to spend time with you..
☆ — KALiM AL-ASiM
probably one of the best people ever to have a crush on you if that even makes sense..
spoils you rotten, even more than when he spoils his friends which is obviously already huge. wanna buy something online but can't? he's already asking for the link so he can buy it for you!
you obviously feel bad whenever he does this, so you try to remind him that he doesn't have to do all of this stuff for you.
not only with gifts, he spoils you rotten with affection too. you feel bad for jamil as well, he seems annoyed, but as long as kalim's happy.
very very respectful and nice to you, and will stop anything you don't want him to do anytime, he sometimes flirts with you unintentionally too..
hugs you literally at literally any chance he gets, he's also pretty clingy, if you haven't noticed that yet.
shows you off to other scarabia students, it's pretty obvious that he has a crush on you too.
bro's lovesick
gets so upset when something happens to you because of him, worries that people will try to do some crazy shit to you as well because you have a good connection with him..
introduces you to his family like you're his wife or something.. and then when you ask him what are you guys he'll go:
"are we not engaged" "NO??"
he was fully convinced that you guys were dating already
he's a little bit delusional but that's ok..
☆ — JAMiL ViPER
like riddle, jamil does not have the time to fall in love with someone since he's already busting his ass off taking care of kalim.. and with his academics too. plus the overblot situation but we don't talk about that.
maybe you are a little bit scared of him as well, but little do you know this guy will literally adjust for you anytime. it's really hard to see though when he does.
VERY hard to see that he has a crush on you though. you'd confess and he'd be like,
"i gave you so much signs what do you mean i might not like you back"
you were starstruck when you heard him say that. what does he mean signs. does he mean when he glared at you in class..? you thought you did something wrong for a second.
like floyd, kalim once almost exposed jamil for liking you accidentally.. don't get me wrong, jamil didn't tell kalim anything, he just found out himself.
jamil definitely likes you trying his culture's food, especially if he cooked it himself! it's not obvious, but he lets a small smile creep up onto his lips.
studies with you too if you're ever having a hard time. studying? nah, more like tutoring.. he's kinda harsh at first but then softens up a bit when he sees that you're really struggling.
☆ — SiLVER
im sure we all know silver is a generally pretty reserved person. and that doesn't change even when he's crushing on you.
but you do notice him stealing glances from time to time whenever you walk past him, lilia definitely asks him about that.
he may be a tad bit more open with you than others? but it's purely because he trusts you.
you sometimes tie his hair to the hairstyle called "apple hair" when he's sleeping and he doesn't notice even when he wakes up, he only notices after looking at a mirror..
genuinely doesn't mind though. lilia thinks it's adorable (he also thinks you guys are perfect for each other)
and that's why lilias opinions are always important..
generally, you guys usually talk through chat because you two don't really have the time to talk to each other physically.
but still, he still thinks you're beautiful. even if he can't see you all the time. this dynamic is kinda like a hallway crush typebeat..??
lilia is your number 1 fan alongside malleus!! sebek still has mixed feelings but he likes you generally! he just isn't sure if he likes you for silver.. or if he's not sure if he likes silver for you.. does that make sense?
after awhile he joins malleus and lilia.
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©myunghology
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theonottsbxtch · 1 month ago
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PREACHER'S DAUGHTER PT 2 | MV1
an: GUYS IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS AU! Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist for this au im so ready, it'll be tagged as #preacheraumax on my page if you want to find all the posts. i'm already writing pt 3, feel free to talk to me abt this au!!
wc: 6.3k
part one
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The late-afternoon sun spilled golden light over the trailer park, painting the rusted edges of Max’s trailer with a soft glow. From the open window of his trailer, the smell of dinner drifted out—pasta, he thought, though he wasn’t sure. She’d insisted on cooking again, and he hadn’t had it in him to argue. He leaned against his car outside for a minute, absently wiping his hands with an oil-stained rag, trying—and failing—to ignore the way his T-shirt hung loose on her frame when she flitted through the tiny kitchen through the small window.
A week of this. A week of her brushing past him, all sweet smiles and quiet thank-yous, like she didn’t notice the way his pulse spiked every time she tucked her hair behind her ear or hummed while folding his clothes. He’d been respectful, giving her space, knowing she needed time to heal, but damn if she didn’t make it difficult.
The screen door creaked open, and there she was, standing on the step with a plate in her hands and a soft grin. “Dinner’s ready.”
He bit back a groan, tossed the rag onto the bike seat, and followed her inside.
They ate quietly, the scrape of forks on mismatched plates filling the small space. She’d been unusually quiet all day, and when she finally set her fork down, her eyes were a little too bright, her voice a little too soft.
“I talked to my aunt,” she said.
Max froze, his fork halfway to his mouth. He set it down carefully, leaning back in his chair. “Yeah?”
“She’s expecting me next week. She’s got a room for me, and she says I can stay as long as I need to.”
He nodded, keeping his face neutral, even though something sharp twisted in his chest. “That’s good. Safe place for you. Close to college.”
Her fingers fidgeted with the edge of the table. “You’ll take me, won’t you?”
“Of course.” His voice came out rougher than he meant it to, and her eyes flicked up, searching his face.
The week passed too quickly. Every time he came home from work to see her curled up on his couch or folding laundry to some old song on the radio, he told himself not to get used to it. But it was impossible not to, and when the day came, he couldn’t shake the weight in his chest as they loaded the last of her bags into the back of his truck.
The drive to her aunt’s house was quiet. She played with the hem of her dress, and he kept his hands tight on the wheel, like if he gripped hard enough, he could keep her there.
When they pulled up to the modest house on the edge of town, she didn’t move right away. He cut the engine, the silence stretching thin between them.
“I’ll come back on weekends,” she said, her voice almost a whisper.
“Promise?”
Her head turned, and for the first time all day, she smiled—a small, fragile thing that made his chest ache. “Promise.”
He stepped out, helping her with her bags, and when they reached the porch, he couldn’t stop himself from wrapping his arms around her waist. She stiffened for a moment, then melted into him, her head resting against his chest.
“You’re not getting rid of me that easy, you know,” he murmured into her hair.
She pulled back just enough to press a kiss to his cheek, her lips warm against his stubble. His heart stopped, then kicked back up at double speed.
“Don’t forget me, Max,” she said softly.
“Not a chance.”
The door opened behind her, and a woman—her aunt, he assumed—stepped out, eyeing him curiously.
“And who’s this?”
She glanced back at Max, her eyes lingering on him like she didn’t want to let go. Then she smiled, a little sadly.
“Just a good friend.”
The words stung, but he smiled anyway, stepping back and shoving his hands in his pockets. “Take care of her,” he said, his voice low but firm.
Her aunt nodded, ushering her inside. Max stayed on the porch for a moment, watching the door close behind her, the ache in his chest settling into something heavier.
When the weekend came along, Max was in the middle of patching up an old carburetor on a kitchen counter when he heard the knock at the door. He wiped his hands on his jeans and squinted at the clock on the wall. It was late—closer to eight than six—but the knock came again, firm and impatient.
Grumbling under his breath, he crossed the room, swung the door open, and froze.
She was standing there on his porch, a duffle bag slung over her shoulder, her hair pulled back in that effortless way that always drove him crazy. She smiled up at him, all innocent charm and a hint of mischief, like she hadn’t just made his heart stop.
“Hey,” she said, stepping past him and into the trailer without waiting for an invitation.
“Hey?” he echoed, spinning to follow her. “What are you doing here? You were supposed to call.”
She dropped the bag onto his couch, her smile not faltering in the slightest. “It’s the weekend, isn’t it? I promised I’d come back.”
“Yeah, but—” He ran a hand through his hair, trying to sound stern. “You’re not supposed to just show up. I could’ve come and picked you up, you know.”
She waved him off, heading toward the kitchen. “I’m not helpless, Max. I caught a bus. Besides, I liked the idea of surprising you.”
Max sighed, leaning against the counter as she poked around his cabinets, clearly unimpressed. “You’re impossible, you know that?”
“Hmm.” She glanced over her shoulder, her eyes twinkling. “You’re welcome, by the way.”
“For what?”
“For not fainting when I walked in here.” She gestured to the cluttered counters and the pile of laundry shoved into the corner. “Honestly, the state of this place would make half the church faint.”
Max smirked, crossing his arms. “Well, my cleaning fairy hasn’t been around this week.”
She turned back to him, arching an eyebrow. “Your cleaning fairy?”
“Yeah, little thing. Shows up unannounced, makes herself at home, organises my life for free.” He shrugged, his voice teasing. “She’s gotten kinda bossy, though.”
She rolled her eyes but didn’t fight the grin spreading across her face. “Well, your cleaning fairy is back.”
“Don’t.” His voice softened, and she looked up at him in surprise. “Don’t clean, okay? You don’t have to do all that. You’re not here to look after me.”
“I like it.”
Her words were simple, but they hit him harder than they should have. She liked being here, liked taking care of him, even if he didn’t deserve it.
Before he could think of how to respond, she stepped closer, her hand brushing his arm. Then, leaning up on her toes, she kissed his cheek, quick and light.
“Thanks for letting me stay,” she said softly.
“Yeah,” he murmured, his throat tight. “Anytime.”
Her fingers lingered on his arm for a moment before she turned away, diving into the mess with a determination that made him smile despite himself.
He leaned against the wall, watching her, his heart feeling lighter for the first time in a week. She was impossible, infuriating, and everything he couldn’t stop thinking about.
“I was supposed to go out tonight,” he finally said.
She glanced back at him, her hands covered in soap. “Oh?”
“Yeah, Danny called earlier. Said he wanted to hit the bar. I told him I might swing by.” He paused, watching her reaction.
She didn’t seem fazed, just smiled. “You should go. It’s fine.”
He frowned. “I don’t want to leave you here alone.”
She rinsed a plate, setting it on the drying rack with a satisfying clink. “Max, I’ll be fine. I can take care of myself, you know.”
“That’s not the point.”
Her gaze softened as she turned to face him, drying her hands on a dish towel. “I know you want to stay. But you shouldn’t put your whole life on hold just because I’m here.”
He opened his mouth to argue, but she stepped closer, her expression gentle but firm. “Go out. Have fun. I’m not going anywhere.”
For a moment, he debated pushing back. The idea of leaving her here, even for a few hours, felt wrong. But the quiet certainty in her voice eased something in his chest.
“Okay,” he relented. “But only if you promise to text me if you need anything.”
She rolled her eyes, but there was a playful smile on her lips. “Yes, daddy.”
He shot her a mock glare as he grabbed his jacket and keys. At the door, he turned back to her, his hand lingering on the frame. “Don’t clean anything, all right? Just relax.”
“Sure,” she said, a little too quickly.
He narrowed his eyes at her, but she waved him off with a laugh, and he finally stepped out into the night.
When Max got to the bar, it was loud and crowded, the kind of place Max usually thrived in, but tonight felt different. Danny was mid-sentence about something—or someone—when Max’s attention drifted again.
He found himself staring at his beer, her voice echoing in his head. I like it here.
“Max, you listening?” Danny nudged him with an elbow.
“Yeah, yeah,” Max muttered, though he wasn’t. His mind was back at the trailer, wondering if she’d actually taken a break or if he’d come home to find everything spotless.
“Man, you’ve been spaced out all night. What’s up with you?”
“Nothing,” Max lied, draining the last of his beer. “I gotta head out.”
Danny raised an eyebrow but didn’t push. “Suit yourself.”
When Max got back to the trailer, the place didn’t feel like his.
The counters were wiped clean, the laundry folded and stacked neatly, and even the perpetually sticky spot on the floor by the fridge was gone. He sighed, shaking his head as he locked the door behind him.
“Stubborn,” he muttered, though a smile tugged at his lips.
His gaze landed on the couch, and there she was, curled up under one of his old blankets, her chest rising and falling in soft, even breaths.
“Of course,” he whispered, his voice soft as he crouched beside her.
Carefully, he slid his arms under her, lifting her with ease. She stirred, her head resting against his shoulder as he carried her to the bed.
“Max?” she murmured sleepily.
“Yeah, it’s me,” he said, his voice low.
“I wanted to wait up,” she whispered, her words slurring slightly.
“I know.” He laid her down gently, pulling the blanket over her.
He moved to the dresser, rummaging for a clean shirt to sleep in when her voice, still soft but more awake, stopped him.
“You usually just sleep in boxers.”
He turned, eyebrows raised. “Noticed that, huh?”
She smiled, her eyes half-lidded. “I don’t mind if you do.”
For a second, he didn’t move, her words hanging between them like an unspoken promise. Then he chuckled, shaking his head. “You’re gonna be the death of me, you know that?”
Her smile widened, but she was already drifting back to sleep.
Max sighed, tugging his shirt off and tossing it onto the chair. He slid under the blanket beside her, careful not to disturb her. As her breathing evened out again, he let himself relax, the weight of the night fading as he listened to the quiet.
She was here. And for now, that was enough.
The warmth was the first thing Max noticed as he stirred awake. His trailer was always cold in the mornings, the thin walls doing little to keep the night chill at bay, but now there was a soft, comforting heat pressed against his side. He cracked one eye open and immediately froze.
She was curled into him, her head resting on his chest, one arm draped across his torso like it was the most natural thing in the world. Her breath was slow and steady, her face relaxed in sleep, and her fingers clutched lightly at the fabric of his shirt.
Max’s heart thudded hard against his ribs, a deep ache settling in his chest. She fit so perfectly against him, like she’d always belonged there. He lay still, not wanting to wake her, though he couldn’t stop his hand from coming to rest lightly on her back.
The quiet moment stretched, his mind racing with thoughts he wasn’t ready to face, until the smell hit him. Warm, buttery, sweet—pancakes? His brow furrowed as he sniffed the air. Was he imagining things?
He shifted slightly, and her eyes fluttered open. She blinked up at him, her expression soft and drowsy, and he swallowed hard.
“Morning,” she mumbled, her voice thick with sleep.
“Morning,” he replied, his voice low. “You smell that?”
She smiled, untangling herself from him and sitting up with a yawn. “Yeah. Pancakes.”
He frowned, sitting up as well. “I didn’t even know I had stuff to make pancakes.”
She turned to him, her eyes twinkling with amusement. “You didn’t. I snuck out earlier and grabbed a few things.”
He blinked. “You went shopping? Without waking me?”
“You looked peaceful,” she said with a shrug, climbing out of bed, not bothering to put the skirt she must have left with earlier back on. 
He was sure that his cause of death was going to be her walking around his trailer in one of his shirts and her stupid cotton panties.
He followed her to the kitchen, still trying to wrap his head around the idea of her slipping out and coming back unnoticed. Sure enough, there was a stack of golden pancakes on the counter, a jar of syrup beside it, and two mismatched plates waiting to be served.
“You’re unbelievable,” he muttered, though there was no heat in his words.
“Thank you,” she replied with a grin, flipping the last pancake onto the stack before turning to him.
“What’s the occasion?” he asked, gesturing to the pancakes.
“It’s Sunday,” she said simply, as if that explained everything.
“Yeah, and?”
Her smile faltered for a moment, a flicker of something—nervousness, maybe—crossing her face. “It’s church day.”
The realisation hit him like a freight train. Of course. It was her first Sunday since she’d left home. A pang of guilt tugged at him as he imagined what this day must mean to her.
“Right,” he said softly. “Big day.”
She nodded, fiddling with the edge of his shirt.
“Do you want me to come with you?” The words were out before he could stop them.
Her eyes widened in surprise, and he immediately regretted it. “I mean, I know I’m not exactly the church-going type, but—”
She cut him off with a laugh, her expression softening. “Max, you don’t even own a church-appropriate outfit.”
He scratched the back of his neck, glancing toward his wardrobe. She wasn’t wrong. His idea of formal wear was a clean pair of jeans and a button-up he hadn’t worn in years.
“You sure you don’t want me to tag along?” he asked, feeling strangely out of his depth.
She shook her head, her voice gentle. “I appreciate it, but I’ll be fine. You can wait outside for me this week if you want.”
“Deal,” he said, relief and a hint of disappointment mingling in his chest.
She smiled again, stepping closer and resting a hand on his arm. “Thank you for offering, though. It means a lot.”
“Yeah, well,” he said, clearing his throat and looking away. “Somebody’s gotta keep an eye on you.”
She laughed, her fingers lingering on his arm for a moment before she turned back to the pancakes.
Max leaned against the counter, watching her as she plated their breakfast. She moved with a quiet confidence, her presence filling the small space in a way that felt both comforting and terrifying.
As they sat down to eat, he couldn’t shake the feeling that this Sunday—this moment—was going to stay with him long after she walked out the door.
Max didn’t know what he had with her, but he loved it. He loved every weekend she spent with him, loved the way her presence brightened his space. He loved the little things she did—the soft hum of her voice filling his trailer, the way she folded his shirts with the corners lined up perfectly, and the way she always looked at him like he was more than the guy with grease-stained hands and a rough past.
He didn’t deserve her, and he knew it. But damn if he wasn’t going to soak up every moment she gave him.
It was midweek when she surprised him. The steady rhythm of clanking tools and revving engines filled the garage as Max worked on a beat-up old Ford, grease smudged across his forearms. The day had been uneventful so far, the usual grind of repairs keeping his hands busy and his thoughts on autopilot.
Then she walked in.
He didn’t see her at first, his head buried under the hood, but the sound of her soft “Hi, Max,” was enough to make him straighten immediately, his heart giving an uncharacteristic jump.
She stood near the door, a paper bag in hand, wearing one of those sundresses that always made him weak. Her hair caught the sunlight streaming through the open garage door, and she looked so out of place among the grease and oil stains that it made him grin.
“Hey, angel,” he said, wiping his hands on a rag as he walked over to her. Without thinking, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. The scent of her shampoo—something floral and sweet—hit him, and he lingered for just a second longer than he should have.
“What’s this?” he asked, nodding toward the bag.
“Lunch,” she said simply, holding it out to him.
His brow furrowed as he took it, glancing inside. A neatly packed sandwich, an apple, and a bottle of water stared back at him. “I was fine for lunch,” he said, a little sheepishly. “You didn’t have to do this.”
Her lips curved into a knowing smile, and she crossed her arms. “A hot dog and a beer is not healthy for you, Max.”
He chuckled, shaking his head. “What, you been spying on me now?”
“I’ve been paying attention,” she countered, stepping closer and poking playfully at his stomach. “You keep eating like that, and you’ll lose your figure.”
“Oh, is that what this is about?” he teased, setting the bag on a nearby workbench. He leaned down slightly, lowering his voice to a flirtatious drawl. “You trying to cop a look at my abs, angel?”
Her eyes widened, and she opened her mouth to retort, but before she could, he grabbed the hem of his shirt and lifted it just enough to reveal his toned stomach, a smirk playing on his lips.
Her face turned bright red, and she quickly looked away, stammering, “You’re impossible.”
“Hey, you started it,” he said with a laugh, dropping his shirt back into place. He couldn’t help but admire the way her blush crept down her neck. She was too easy to fluster, and he loved every second of it.
“I have to catch the bus back soon,” she said after a moment, still avoiding his gaze as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.
The mention of her leaving tugged at something in his chest, but he nodded. “All right. Thanks for the lunch, though. Really.”
Her smile returned, softer this time. “Take care of yourself, okay?”
“Always.”
After she left, Max stood by the workbench for a moment, staring at the lunch bag like it was some kind of relic.
“Who was that?” a gruff voice broke his reverie.
Max turned to see his boss, Tommy, leaning against the frame of the garage’s office door, a cigarette dangling from his lips.
“Just a friend,” Max said, though the words tasted wrong. She was more than that, even if he couldn’t quite put a label on it.
Tommy snorted. “Yeah, sure. A friend who packs you lunch and makes you look like a lovesick puppy every time she’s around.”
“Shut up,” Max muttered, grabbing a wrench and returning to the Ford.
Tommy laughed, taking a long drag from his cigarette before speaking again. “You’ve got balls, kid. Being with the preacher’s daughter? That’s a whole mess I wouldn’t touch with a ten-foot pole.”
Max stiffened, but he didn’t respond.
Tommy continued, his tone softening. “But I gotta say... I haven’t seen you this happy since the day you bought that trailer. She’s good for you.”
Max glanced over his shoulder, his grip tightening on the wrench. “Yeah. She is.”
Tommy nodded, stubbing out his cigarette. “Don’t screw it up, kid.”
Max didn’t answer, but as he went under the Ford, he couldn’t stop the small smile tugging at his lips. Whatever this thing was with her, he wasn’t letting it go.
No less than a few days later she was stepping out of her last lecture of the day, her bag slung over her shoulder and her friend Sarah chattering animatedly about some party happening over the weekend. The late afternoon sun cast a golden glow over the campus, and the warm breeze carried the faint scent of freshly cut grass.
But then she saw it.
Parked just beyond the gates was a familiar motorbike, its polished chrome glinting in the sunlight. Leaning against it, arms crossed and looking every bit the troublemaker he was, stood Max.
Her breath hitched, a smile spreading across her face before she could stop it. He didn’t belong here—his grease-streaked jeans and leather jacket a stark contrast to the sea of students with their backpacks and books—but somehow, he looked perfect.
“Is that... your boyfriend?” Sarah asked, her voice a mix of curiosity and disbelief.
She hesitated for a split second, then shook her head. “Just a friend.” But her cheeks betrayed her, flushing pink as she adjusted her bag and headed toward him.
As she approached, Max straightened, his expression softening in a way he reserved only for her. “Milady,” he said with a playful smirk, holding out the spare helmet like a knight presenting a prize.
She laughed, her smile widening as she took the helmet from him. “You’re ridiculous,” she teased, leaning up to press a quick kiss to his cheek.
He didn’t bother hiding the grin that spread across his face as she slid the helmet on. Swinging her leg over the back of the bike, she settled behind him, her arms wrapping securely around his waist.
“Hold on tight, angel,” he said, revving the engine.
The ride to her aunt’s was a familiar one now. She’d spent so many weekends at his trailer that the route was second nature, but it never lost its charm. The wind whipped past her, carrying away the stress of the day, and all she could think about was the solid warmth of Max in front of her and the way her heart felt light every time she was with him.
When they pulled up outside her aunt’s house, the sun was beginning to dip below the horizon, casting the world in hues of orange and pink. She slid off the bike, pulling the helmet off and shaking out her hair.
“Drive home safe,” she said softly, her eyes lingering on him.
“For you, always, angel,” he replied, his voice low but steady.
Her lips curved into a small, grateful smile as she turned and headed up the walkway. She glanced back once, just in time to see him watching her, the faintest hint of a smile on his face before he started the engine and roared away into the fading light.
Max never would have referred to his trailer as a home. For years, it had been little more than a roof over his head—a place to sleep and keep his stuff, nothing more. It wasn’t like the house he’d known she’d grown up in, with its creaking floors and warm kitchen smells, or even the crummy apartment he’d shared with Danny in his early twenties.
But now...
Now there were little reminders of her everywhere. A book she’d left on the coffee table, its pages dog-eared in the way she knew drove him crazy. A neatly folded throw blanket she’d brought over one chilly night. The small vase on the windowsill, holding wildflowers she’d picked on a whim.
She hadn’t moved in—not really. But every item she left behind, every small touch of hers that lingered, made the space feel warmer. More alive.
More like home.
Max sat on the couch, his gaze drifting over the room. His place was still rough around the edges—there was no hiding the peeling wallpaper or the worn linoleum floors—but with her here, even in these small ways, it felt different.
He picked up the book she’d left, turning it over in his hands. The corners were bent, and a faint scent of her perfume clung to the pages. He shook his head with a smile, setting it back down.
Yeah, he thought, leaning back against the cushions. She made it feel like home.
<3 <3 <3
Max’s life continued with her like this for another eleven months. Each day, it felt like he was living in a dream he never wanted to wake up from. They fell into a rhythm—a routine that felt as comforting as it was impossible to believe.
She was no longer just the preacher’s daughter he had met outside a Church. She was part of his life, his home. More than half the time, she stayed at his place now, spending her nights curled up on his couch, reading or laughing at some ridiculous things he'd say, more often than not in the same oversized t-shirt she’d first worn when she moved in. Her presence filled every corner of his small, humble space, making it feel less like a place where he merely existed and more like somewhere he belonged.
He had never pushed her for anything—never tried to rush her into kissing him, never demanded more than what she was willing to give. There were moments where he could feel the pull between them, when their eyes lingered a little longer or their hands brushed in ways that made his heart race, but he was patient. She had her own pace, and for once, he didn’t want to ruin it by moving too fast. She had her own life to rebuild, and he was content to be a steady presence in it.
She still went to church every Sunday, keeping that part of her life separate, even though she never spoke to her father anymore. Church was the one thing she still clung to, the only part of her old life that hadn’t unravelled completely. Max didn’t understand it—he couldn’t—but he never asked her to give it up. If it brought her peace, if it helped her hold on to a piece of herself, then he respected it. He just wished she would let him share in it, but he wasn’t going to force it.
And then, the day finally came.
Max had been saving for months, every extra penny he made going toward the dream he’d never dared to voice out loud—the dream of getting them out of the cramped, creaky trailer and into something better. A place where she didn’t have to worry about the walls being thin or the smell of grease lingering in the air. Something more... theirs.
He had found it. A small but cosy apartment uptown, with high ceilings and a view of the city skyline. It was perfect for them—quiet, private, and just far enough from everything they both needed to escape from. He’d signed the lease that morning, a rush of pride and anticipation filling his chest as he pictured her reaction.
When she walked through the door that evening, he couldn’t hold it in anymore. His heart was racing, his palms sweaty as he met her at the door.
“I got us a place,” he said, his voice thick with excitement.
She blinked, clearly caught off guard by the suddenness of his words, but the moment she saw the joy in his eyes, the realisation hit her. She stepped forward, her face lighting up with the kind of smile that made everything else fade into the background.
“Max...” she whispered, and without thinking, without hesitating, she threw her arms around him, pulling him close.
Her lips found his in an instant.
It wasn’t a soft kiss, not one of those cautious first kisses that came with hesitations or uncertainty. It was full of the weight of everything that had built up between them—the months of waiting, the slow burn of tension that had been simmering beneath the surface. Their kiss was deep, heated, urgent, as if they both had been holding their breath and were finally allowed to exhale.
Max’s hands moved to her waist, pulling her closer, feeling the heat of her body against his. He deepened the kiss, his lips claiming hers as if he had waited an eternity for this moment. He felt her fingers thread through his hair, tugging him closer, her body pressing into his with a desperation that matched his own.
It was the kind of kiss that shook him to the core, that made everything else in the world fade into the background—her soft breath against his lips, the quiet hum of the city outside, the rush of blood in his ears. All that mattered was her.
Her arms slid up around his neck, her body melting against his, and for the first time in a year, Max felt like he had finally found the place where he belonged.
When they finally pulled apart, their foreheads resting together, their breaths ragged, she looked at him with something that could only be described as wonder. Her eyes were wide, her lips swollen from their kiss, and there was a softness in her gaze that made his heart stutter in his chest.
“I’ve been waiting for that,” she breathed, her voice thick with emotion.
Max smiled, his thumb brushing gently across her cheek. “Yeah, me too.”
There was a moment of silence, the kind that spoke volumes in the space between them. Her hands lingered on his chest, and he could feel the rapid beat of her heart against his. He had never known a kiss could feel so much like coming home.
He cleared his throat, his voice hoarse. “We... we really did it, huh?”
She nodded, her smile widening. “We did.”
Max had never been one for big, sweeping gestures. But with her, it was different. Everything about her made him want to be more than the guy who had nothing. He wanted to be the man who made her feel safe, cherished, loved. He wanted to give her everything—everything she deserved.
He kissed her again, slower this time, his lips brushing over hers as if savouring the sweetness of the moment. When they finally pulled apart, he smiled down at her, his hand gently cupping her face.
“I’m so damn lucky to have you,” he said softly.
She grinned, her eyes sparkling with something he couldn’t quite place, but it was the kind of look that made his heart stutter in his chest. “No, Max,” she whispered, her voice full of warmth. “I’m the lucky one.”
And for the first time, in a long time, Max allowed himself to believe it. He wasn’t just living with her. He wasn’t just sharing space with her.
He was building a life with her. A life that, even in its quiet moments, felt like everything.
And for the first time, he realised what home truly was.
The kiss lingered in the air between them, warm and slow, as if time had stretched to accommodate the overwhelming intensity of the moment. Max’s hands rested gently on her waist, feeling the soft press of her body against his, and the faint sound of their shared breath was the only noise in the room. They were tangled together—hearts racing, bodies melting into each other—as though nothing else mattered.
For the first time in a year, Max felt completely alive. Completely whole.
She pulled away slightly, breathless, her cheeks flushed and eyes wide, still processing the heat of the kiss, the weight of what it meant. Her lips parted, but before she could speak, he leaned in, his lips brushing against hers one last time, a soft whisper against her skin.
“Marry me.”
The words were so quiet, so soft, that for a second, she thought she had imagined them. She blinked, drawing back slightly to look at him, her chest tightening with uncertainty. “What?”
Max smiled at her confusion, a hint of something deeper in his eyes. His hands gently cupped her face, his thumb running along her jawline as if trying to memorise every detail of her. He leaned in, his lips hovering just above hers as he whispered again, more seriously this time, “Marry me, angel.”
She froze for a heartbeat, thinking it was some sort of joke, some playful teasing. The idea of Max, the guy who’d never believed in love or commitment, asking her something like that was almost impossible to believe.
But the sincerity in his eyes, the vulnerability she had never seen from him before, made her heart skip a beat. There was no hint of jest, no trace of humour. He meant it.
Max saw the hesitation in her eyes and gently kissed her lips again, his voice rough and low as he pulled back just enough to speak.
“I never thought I’d make it past twenty-one,” he began, his gaze intense, almost haunted, as if these words were ones he had carried inside him for far too long. “I’ve been lost for so long. I didn’t think I’d ever have a reason to keep going, to fight for anything.”
She could hear the rawness in his voice, the weight of everything he had lived through—the loneliness, the struggles, the doubts. His eyes searched hers, looking for understanding, for a connection that only she could give.
“But you, angel...” His voice softened, but the words still hit her like a wave, sweeping away any doubts. “You’ve given me hope. You’ve given me a reason to live. A reason to fight for something better.”
Her breath caught in her throat, and for a long moment, neither of them spoke. The silence between them wasn’t uncomfortable—it was peaceful, full of something unspoken, something they both felt but had never truly expressed until now.
She could feel her heart racing, her emotions swelling inside her chest, a warmth spreading through her like wildfire. Max—rough-around-the-edges Max, the guy who had been her rock for so long—was here, telling her that she had been the reason he had found the strength to keep going.
With her, he had found his reason.
“I...” Her voice faltered, thick with emotion, and she cupped his face in her hands, leaning in closer. “Yes, Max. Yes, I’ll marry you.”
The words were barely out of her mouth before he kissed her again, this time softer, more tender, as though sealing a promise. She melted into it, her fingers threading through his hair, holding on to him as if this moment was the only one that mattered.
When they finally pulled apart, both of them breathless, the weight of their promise hanging in the air, Max’s hands moved slowly down her body. He smiled as he reached for her purity ring, the symbol of the life she had left behind. With the gentleness of someone who understood the significance of the gesture, he took the ring off her finger.
“I’ve got something for you,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion.
Max took one of his necklaces, a simple silver chain that had always felt like a part of him, and threaded her ring onto it. He placed it around his neck, letting the cool metal of the ring rest against her skin. “This is you now,” he said quietly, his eyes not leaving hers. “And I’m the only one who gets to wear it.”
Her fingers gently touched the ring, feeling the warmth of her promise against him.
Then, Max reached down to his own hand, taking off a ring—one he never took off, the one that had been his symbol of defiance for years. He hadn’t given it to anyone else, and he certainly hadn’t planned on giving it to anyone. But now, with her, it felt like the only thing that made sense.
With a steady hand, he reached for the cross necklace she always wore, taking it between his fingers and slipping the ring onto it. The cool metal of his ring clicked against the chain, its weight heavier than it had ever felt before.
“This one’s for you,” he said softly, brushing her hair behind her ear as he tucked the cross back against her skin. “Because we’re in this together now. No going back.”
She stared at the ring hanging from her necklace, her heart swelling with a mix of emotions—love, disbelief, and gratitude. She had never imagined a life like this. But now, with him, she couldn’t imagine it any other way.
“I’m ready, Max,” she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. “I’m ready to start this new part of my life. With you.”
Max pulled her into his arms, holding her close as if she was the most precious thing in the world, and whispered against her hair, “I’ll spend the rest of my life showing you how much I love you.”
And in that moment, with her purity ring around his neck and his own ring on her cross necklace, it was clear to both of them that this was only the beginning.
The beginning of forever.
taglist: @sinofwriting @le-le-lea @vanicogh @iamred-iamyellow @rayaskoalaland @spookyanamurdock @iimplicitt
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justmeinadaze · 2 months ago
Text
November Rain (Boxer!Eddie X Plus Size Y/N)
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A/N: I dreamed about this idea and my time of the month fueled it.
Please Enjoy <3
Warnings: Older (Early to Mid 30s) Dominate Boxer Eddie X Plus Size Fem younger (early to mid 20s) sub Y/N, SMUT, Daddy kink (because Im me), light spanking, big dick Eddie Munson :P, etc.
ANGST, reader meets the boxer while on a date with someone else, mentions of pain from the ring but nothing too dramatic, reader and Eddie mentions just getting out of relationships, nothing negative is mentioned about Y/N size <3. All positive and Eddie thinks she's perfect :). CLIFFHANGER ENDING 😈
Word Count: 4753
Other Eddie Stories here/ Donate to Me
"When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same?"
“Paige, I hate you. This guy is the worst.”
“Oh, he’s not that bad! Lol. Where did he take you?”
“A boxing match.”
“NO! Lol. Oh my god. I hate boxing and how the fuck are you supposed to talk there?”
“He’s taking me to a bar after.”
“Text me when you get home so I know you’re not dead :P.”
“Love you to, dork.”
“Who are you talking to?”, your blind date asks as he lightly nudges you with his shoulder. 
“Paige. I’m just telling her how nice you are and that you haven’t murdered me yet.”
“Ha! Well, the night’s still young.”, he laughed causing your eyebrows to furrow in confusion, not out of fear but annoyance that he thought that was the appropriate thing to say to someone he only met an hour ago.
When your friend and roommate suggested you go on this blind date you originally declined. You had just gotten out of a 2-year relationship and wasn’t in the mood to dive back in. After a couple of lonely (and needy) nights, you changed your tune. 
She insisted he was a nice guy she knew from work and he absolutely was but it didn’t overshadow his awkward personality. When he suggested coming to a boxing match, you were actually intrigued thinking it was an out of the box idea instead of going to the movies or dinner. As the small arena began to fill, you found yourself more fascinated by the people around you casually talking about one of the fighters. 
Eddie Munson was a “veteran” in the field, being a bit older than most boxers in the ring. He had won multiple matches but for whatever reason managers and venues didn’t take him seriously. The kid he was fighting had many accolades and higher stats but his wins matched his opponents from the pamphlet you skimmed through while you two waited. 
As the lights lowered and both men were introduced into the ring, you couldn’t help but focus on the older boxer. He was extremely handsome with his sharp jaw and intense, piercing eyes that commanded attention. His chest and muscular arms were littered with tattoos that accented his physique perfectly.  
With all the cheering and commotion around the ring, you were surprised when his eyes landed on you. He tried to look away but you noticed his gaze kept lingering back to where you were sitting. Trying not to appear intimidated, you smirked his way and leaned back in your seat where your date’s arm was strewn along the back. The boxer slowly took you in, scanning along the short sleeve black dress that clung tightly to your busty chest and large curves. Your high heeled shoe absently tapped the air as he glanced down your legs and back up to your face. 
Someone you assumed was his coach, tapped his shoulder and forced him to focus as he screamed instruction into his ear. Rising to his feet, the person took his robe before he headed for the middle of the ring. On his short stride, his gaze shifted towards you again making your smile grow as you silently mouth the words “Good Luck.”
Eddie jumps slightly as the announcer’s voice flows loudly near him startling him as you giggle and he shakes his head.
***
“Yeah so I do contracting at this firm and it’s so stupid but…”
You don’t know if your date notices but your eyes had begun to glaze over as he spoke. Your date seemed like a nice enough guy but was definitely not your cup of tea. The one thing you feared about dating again was mundane shit that came with casual conversation. You always wished you could skip over this part and get to the moment where you were comfortable again. 
“I feel like I’m droning on and on. Tell me about you.”
“Oh…um…there’s not much to tell really.”
“Of course there is. Tell me about your job, your family, everything!”, he chuckles a bit too enthusiastically as you try to hide your cringe behind your smile. 
“Excuse me, miss. Telephone for you.”, the bartender interrupts as he points at his phone near the end of the counter.
“Oh, thank you. Excuse me.”
After hopping down from your stool, you make your way to the telephone and put it to your ear.
“Hello?”
“I thought maybe I’d give you a minute of peace from chatty Cathy.”, the smooth voice on the other end laughs. 
“Hm. How do you know I wasn’t enjoying the chat?”, you ask as your eyes fleet around the bar.
“Well first off, you were way too eager to get away. I mean you didn’t even ask who was calling. Add in the fact that your face is worth a thousand words, sweetheart.”
It takes you another few seconds before you find your mystery caller leaning against the wall by the front door on his cell phone. The long-haired boxer’s grin grew when your eyes met his as his subtly waved his fingers in your direction. 
“Wanna get out of here?”
“I’m in the middle of date. I can’t just leave.”, you tease knowing full well you’d let him kidnap you if that meant leaving this date behind.
“There’s only so long you can keep up this rouse before he starts getting suspicious so I would make a decision quickly.”
“Pfft, his brain doesn’t move that fast.”
The man’s laugh echoed into your ear straight to your heart as you blushed, glad that you had the ability to make someone laugh like he just had. 
“Honey, a woman as beautiful as you in that sexy dress shouldn’t be bored out of her mind. She should be having her mind blown.”
“And you’re the man to do that?”
“I’d like to try if you give me the chance. I have a feeling you’re not easy to please like all these other giggly girls and I like a challenge.”
“Smooth, Mr. Munson.”, you giggle.
“Ah, so you were there to see me fight.”
“No, sir. It was just a happy accident.”
“Ooooo sir. I like that. You can just call me Eddie for right now though.”
“I prefer the term Daddy.”
It was no longer subtle that the two of you were staring at each other from across the bar. His breathing stutter slightly and you bit your bottom lip to force them to remain still even though you wanted to smirk his way. 
“Y/N? Everything alright?”, your date asked as he placed himself in the chair next to where you were standing. 
“Y/N.”, Eddie repeated as if he was trying to familiarize himself with your name. When you didn’t reply, your date’s palm reaches out to slide down your arm and take your hand in his. “I’m counting every second he touches you. That’s how many times I’m going spank you for allowing it.”
A tear runs down your cheek and you see regret flash through his eyes, worried he may have gone too far before he sees you hang up the phone and pull your hand from your date’s grasp. 
“I have to go. My brother was in-in an accident.”, you cry as you make a beeline to where the boxer was standing near the coat check desk. “Excuse me.”, you murmur as your arm brushes chest, the contact sending a little electricity through you both. 
“No problem.”, he mumbles as he turns to leave, making sure the back of his hand grazes yours as he does. 
“Do you want me to drive you—”
“No, no its ok. My sister lives close by so she’s going to pick me up. She’s the one that called.”
“Ok, well, let me at least wait with you.”
“Alright. You pay and I’ll wait outside.”
After he nods, you sprint outside to find Eddie sitting on a motorcycle offering you a helmet. 
“Really?”, you sass as you take it from his hand and slide it onto your head. 
“Psh like you don’t like it.”
Revving the engine, you cling to his waist as he drives off into the night.
***
Your eyebrow raises as pulls up to a gym and sifts through his pockets to search for his keys. 
“Yeah, um, welcome to my humble abode for the time being.”
“You live in a gym?”
“I live in the back of a gym. Big difference.”
“Oh absolutely.”, you jest as you allow him to lead you inside. “I would figure with how good of a fighter you are, you’d have Rocky 4 levels of riches.”
Again, he cackles as he throws his head back and in that moment, you started to realize you would do anything to continue hearing that sound. 
“I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone from your generation mention such an old movie.”
“It’s not that old and neither are you.”
“Well, aren’t you sweet.”, he smiles as he opens another door in the back and gestures you inside. “I kind of started boxing a bit late in the game compared to everyone else around me. Some of these kids have been doing it their whole lives and I only started training 10 years ago.”
As you take in his little room, Eddie heads to his mini fridge to grab a couple of beers. You could tell, he hadn’t been here long, living out of a suitcase for the time being. 
“How long are you stuck here?”
“I actually just got an apartment so I move in, in about a month.”
“What happened to your last place?”
Eddie smiles as he hands you one of the bottles in his hand. 
“You ask a lot of questions.”
“I’m inquisitive.”, you smirk back as tilt the beer to clink with his before taking a sip. “I need to know if this is where you take your hookups to hide from your wife.”
“What makes you think I’m married?”
“Huh.”, you muse as you take a seat on his couch/bed. “Most men would immediately deny. ‘Oh, no, baby! I’m not married. I swear.’”
The boxer rushes forward as you speak to hastily move his sheets and pillow on to another chair before taking a seat beside you. 
“I’m, um, no I’m not married.”, he chuckles nervously. “Full transparency, I actually just got out of relationship so if I seem…awkward…that’s why.”
“I think you’re doing alright.”, you smile as you turn to face him getting more comfortable and he does the same. “Better than chatty Cathy.”
Again, he laughs and again you swoon. 
“If it makes you feel better I just got out of a two-year relationship myself.”
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. How long has it been?”
“A few months.”
“Geez and you’re already dating?” When you don’t laugh like he does, Eddie panics as you sip your beverage. “No, that came out wrong. I just meant that you’re doing better than me. It’s been a year since I’ve even seen my ex and dating hadn’t even crossed my mind. Fuck, I sound like an idiot.”
Your giggle pierces his heart and he melts in relief. 
“No, you don’t. May I ask what made you find the confidence to ask me over?”
“I saw you from the ring and thought you were a fucking angel I’d never see again. When I walked into the bar and saw you, I knew I couldn’t let the opportunity slip away.”
“Wow. Smooth again, Mr. Munson.”
“I thought you preferred Daddy.” You blushed as your head dipped, trying to hide your eyes but his callused fingers quickly reached out to grab your chin forcing you to look at him again. “This…This goes without saying but you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. We can just talk or—”
Your lips on his interrupted his gentlemanly speech before tilting back slightly so your mouth wasn’t far but you could still see his face. 
“Do I make you nervous, Daddy?”
“Fuuuuuuuck.”, Eddie whispers as both palms cup your cheeks. “I don’t want t-to disappoint you.”
Slowly, you crawl over him till your straddling his lap and take hold of his hands to guide them to your wide hips.
“You won’t, baby, but if this isn’t something you’re into—”
“No, no, no. I’m into it.”, he rushes making you giggle as his face flushes with embarrassment at his earnestness. “My ex wasn’t… she tried for me a couple of times but...”
“You never really fully got to take control?”
“I told you it’s been a while since I’ve dated but it’s been even longer since I was able to be Daddy.”
“Sounds lonely.” His head tilts to the side at your statement as his brows furrow. “People don’t understand it but when I’m in my little girl headspace I feel safe when I’m with the right partner. It’s natural for me sometimes when I’m intimate to slip into that mode and if I was with someone who couldn’t satisfy that… I would feel lonely…like I did something wrong.”
When your eyes meet his again, Eddie’s smiling up at you with a softness you appreciate. 
“Thank you for coming to my TED talk.”
His body shakes as he laughs and you feel the energy in the room lighten. 
Comfortable.
Bringing your lips to his, he reciprocates with more confidence.
“Take your time and ease back into it.”, you whisper. 
You continue to grind against him as you murmur soft words in his ear and his hands roam your back. Gripping the bottom of your dress, he lifts it up your body and groans as his eyes hungrily take you in. 
“Fuck, you’re so fucking sexy.” Smirking, you slide off him, your eyes never leaving his as you remove your panties and toss them at his chest. “Leave your shoes on and crawl to Daddy, baby.”
Your pussy clenches at his words, his confidence in the title starting to return. Sinking to your knees, you do as he says making him groan as he unbuckles his belt and pushes his pants to his ankles allowing his cock to spring free. 
As he spits into his hand and strokes himself, you pause. 
“Jesus. You’re so fucking big.”
“Hey.”, Eddie growls causing your head to snap at attention. “Watch your mouth.”
“I’m sorry, Daddy. I’ve just…” You continue to crawl forward till your hands balance on his knees. “…never had a dick as big as yours inside me. I-I don’t know if it will fit.”
“Shit. It’ll fit, pretty girl. We’ll make it fit. You just have to get it nice and wet.”
After nodding in agreement, he hisses as your hand wraps around him and the tip of your tongue darts out to lick the little beads of precum that had begun to leak out.
“Goddamn it, Y/N.”
Opening your mouth wide, you test the waters and bob your head taking half of him as you allow your tongue to swirl around his head along his slit. 
“T-That’s it, baby.”, Eddie pants as he pulls your hair into a makeshift ponytail to get a better look at you’re doing. “Good girl. Your mouth feels so…so good. Try and take more, sweetheart.”
You do as he asks and promptly gag as your throat constricts around him. 
“Fuck! That’s it. Take it, baby. Choke on Daddy’s cock. Let m-me help.” Holding you tightly, you allow him to use you as he thrusts his hips and his dick hits the back of your throat. “There we go. Mouth open, flat tongue. So fucking beautiful taking my dick like this.”
Tears spill, smearing your make up as he lets you go and you take in big gulps of air. Grasping your cheeks, he kisses your lips as his thumbs wipe away the stains under your eyes. 
“Such a good girl… so good for me. I should have asked but do you have a safe word? Is Red still a good one?”
Eddie smiles as you breathily laugh and give him a peck before climbing up his lap to straddle him again. 
“Red is still good.”
“Turn around, sweetheart.”
After doing what he says, your whole body melts into his slightly sweaty chest as his arms wrap around you. Gripping the base of his shaft, you shutter as he slides his cock between your folds, teasing your clit with his tip. 
“You’re so wet, little girl, fuck. Are you ready for Daddy, baby?”
“Yes. Please.” Lifting your hips to help guide him, the boxer begins to gradually push himself inside of you. “Oh…f-fuck…”
“Are you ok?”, he whispers in your ear as you fully fall back against him. 
“Yeah, yeah. It…feels so good…so big. Mmnah!”, you whine as he slowly thrusts in another inch stretching you open. 
“You’re doing so good for me, Y/N. Take your time.  We have all night, honey.” 
Your half lidded eyes watch as he runs his tongue along his fingers before bringing them down to massage circles against your clit, feeling your pussy flutter and allowing him more leeway as you both groan feeling your lap finally connect with his. 
“You’re—mmph—so fucking tight.”
Experimentally, you roll your hips and the moan that leaves his lips has your eyes rolling as you do it again. You know his fingers gripping your love handles will leave bruises as he starts to guide you but you don’t care as you suck hickies into his neck, smiling at the vibration as he groans. 
“Bounce, pretty girl. Fuck me hard.”
Balancing your hands on his knees, your head lulls forward as you bounce on top of him, mewling repetitive ahs as he slams into that sensitive spot inside you. His palm comes down hard on your ass as he continues to knead his fingers into the plump flesh. 
“God, I can’t get over how fucking sexy you are. Cum for Daddy, sweetheart. Make—fuck—make yourself cum on my cock.”
Falling back against him, his wide lust filled eyes watch as one of your arms comes around to cling to the back of his neck as your other brings your hand to massage your breast. Eddie had never met a woman like you before and was pretty sure he would never meet again. 
Even with his ex, she used to be pretty open minded but never seemed to carry the kind of confidence you did. He knew when he saw you from the ring that you were different but he had promised himself he would focus on his career for the time being before jumping into anything new relationship wise. 
But how could he let you walk out that door tomorrow morning and let you go?
Your body trembled against him and he grunted as your cunt gripped his cock as you came. You rode out your high and the feeling made him almost feral as he picked you up to move you both the floor.
With his hand firmly holding the back of your neck smushing your cheek into the floor, Eddie thrust into you with rough abandon as you fell apart beneath him. 
“Oh my Goooooood. So fucking deep.”
Twisting his hand to curl his fingers in your hair, he yanked you closer to his chest and slowed his pace but not his intensity as his skin slapped obscenely into yours.
“Does my dick feel good, sweetheart?”
“Yeeeeesss—mmmah!”
“Tell me. Tell Daddy how much this tight little pussy loves my cock.”
“Y-Your cock feels so good, Daddy. My pussy was made for you.” As you spoke, his forehead rested against your cheek as his eyes shut and he found his rhythm again. “I want to feel you cum inside me, baby please.”
His eyes snapped open as he scanned your face realizing immediately you were telling the truth. 
“Don’t—Don’t say shit like that, little girl, unless you mean it.”
“P-P-Please, Daddy. I promise I’m safe. I need you to fill me up. I need to feel how good my pussy made you feel.”
“Goddamn it.”, Eddie grunted, pulling out and aggressively flipping you over onto your back before guiding himself back inside you. 
Your legs promptly wrapped around his waist and he pounded into you knowing he wasn’t going to last much longer. 
“Just like that, Daddy. I’m—fuck—M’gonna cum again. Cum with me.”
Balancing on his palms, his chocolate irises took in all of your beautiful features as they contorted in pleasure. It had been so long since he made a woman feel this good and he desperately wanted to please you. Your palms massaged along his slightly sore arms and his chest, gliding effortlessly over his bruises that were beginning to form from his fight earlier that night. 
None of that mattered. 
Every ache and pain he carried from the ring, disappeared as soon as you touched him and all he could focus on was the warmth that was you. 
“You’re so beautiful, sweetheart. I’ll give you what you want.”
Circling your arms around him, you pulled him against your body, needing to absorb him as he rolled his hips, grunting in your ear till you felt his release warm you deeper than any man you had before. The whine Eddie made as his fingers clung to your hair was enough to have the coil snap for the final time that night as your pussy tried to milk everything he had to give. 
You both laid there together silently intertwined for a good long while as you tried to catch your breaths. 
“Are you ok?”, you whisper.
Pushing up onto his elbows, his hand moves some stray hairs away from your sweaty face as he softly smiles down at you. 
“Yeah, baby, I’m good. Are you alright?”
“Yeah, a little sore.”, you answer as your eyes gesture between your bodies. 
“Shit, ok, um, I’ll go slow. Ready?” When you nodded, as gently as he could, he pulled out of your aching cunt, cooing praise at you as you winced. “Good. Good girl. We, um, I don’t have a shower in here but there are locker rooms with showers if you want or we can stay here of course.”
“I’d like to shower, please.”
The way you said please told him you were still coming down from that headspace causing your words to echo in his brain about how lonely it can be being stuck there and not being taken care of properly. 
Rising to his feet, he hastily helped you to yours before taking you in his arms and caring you to the locker room. 
“Thank you. I’m not too heavy?”
“Not at all, princess.”
You watch his face as he turns on the water and makes cute little faces as the cold water hits his hand first before steaming up the area. As he cleaned your skin, his tongue poked out the side of his mouth making a little giggle fall from yours. 
“What are you laughing at?”
“You.”, you smile. “You’re just really adorable.”
“Thank you? I think.”, he grins as he comes up to kiss your forehead.
After you’re both clean and back in his room, he pulls out the couch to turn it into a bed and places you on it before you notice him pause. 
“I, um, I just assumed you’d be falling asleep here. I’m sorry. Did…did you need to get home?”
“Um…” You meant what you said when it came to relationships. You weren’t ready to jump into a new one and when you let him bring you home you told yourself this was just going to be a onetime thing but you couldn’t deny there was something about this man that made you feel safe. Maybe you could just take things slow and see where it led. “No, I can stay.”
Eddie breathed a sigh of relief as he leaned down to kiss your lips. Throwing one his shirts over your frame, you laughed as he pulled on his boxers and obnoxiously jumped into bed.
With your head on his chest and his arm wrapped around you, the two of you talked till the sun slowly began to rise outside his window. 
##################
“I thought you were dead!”, Paige shouted as she lightly pushed your arm before getting up to hug you when she saw you walk into the restaurant you two were supposed to be meeting at. “You didn’t text me or anything and when I woke up you weren’t home.”
“I know! I’m so sorry. I got caught up with someone…”, you grin as your eyes bashfully meet hers.
“Oh, tell me everything.”
The two of you giggle as you regale her with the story of the previous night’s events as you swoon over the older boxer you met. 
“Ugh, well I’m glad something good came from boxing.”, she sassed, sticking out her tongue for emphasis. 
“Good lord, what is it with you and boxing? Were you once a fighter who lost her dream when another fighter broke your neck?”
“No, you movie nerd.”, she laughs. “My dad’s a boxer. I mean I guess you can call him that. He’s a mechanic but decided randomly to start training to fight.”
“Your dad the deadbeat?”
“Yeah. He went training 24/7 and it killed my mother. They stopped spending time together and when they were together they fought constantly. One day a few months ago, he was just gone and next thing I know they are getting a divorce.”
“I’m so sorry, Paige. I know how hard divorce is on a family.”
“He’s supposed to meet me today to get some more of his things. He doesn’t have a place right now and begged my mom to hold his stuff till he found something. I guess he’s won a good amount of matches because he told her the other day he’d saved enough money to finally move. My mom refuses to see him so I’m the messenger I guess.”
“Do you want me to lag behind so I can be your reason to leave? ‘Oh here’s my roommate. We have to go.’”, you joke.
“My saint. Would you please? Op, speak of the goddamn devil.”, she sighs as she flashes you her phone screen. “I’ll meet you outside.”
As she walks outside, you hurry to pay so she’s not alone for too long. Paige was a wonderful roommate and an even better friend. When you met her, you had just had your breakup and nowhere to go. She was sympathetic to your plight and helped you at your absolutely lowest. She got you get back on your feet and now after meeting Eddie, maybe things were finally on the right track again. 
“You don’t have to do this, sweetheart. I can drive down there and get my things myself. She shouldn’t be asking you to be the ‘middleman’. This is between me and your mother.”
“I don’t mind doing it after what you did to her. Imagine how she’d feel if you showed up covered in hickeys. Hide that shit better.”, Paige shouted as she slammed her trunk closed and her father lifted the collar of his jacket. “Whatever doesn’t fucking matter. All that matters to you now is yourself and your dreams, you fucking asshole.”
“Paige, please. Can we just talk so I can explain some things—”
“No, we can’t. My roommates here and we need to go home. Right, Y/N?”, she growls as she turns to face you. 
Your eyes widen as you come face to face with Paige’s “deadbeat” father. Eddie seems equally as surprised as his jaw falls open. 
“Th-This is the girl you moved in with?”, he whispered.
“What do you care? She’s my friend and mom loves her. Come on, Y/N.”
As your roommate, grips your arm and pulls you to her car, you struggle to take your eyes off the older man as his own irises sullenly follow.
Of course. How could I be so stupid to think things would get better? I should have refused the blind like I wanted to. If I had this would never have happened. I’m a fucking idiot. 
As Eddie watches his daughter speed away with the angel he met last night, he pulled the piece of paper you left by his nightstand with your phone number and a note saying you needed to meet your roommate for lunch but you would talk to him later. 
His heart fell into his stomach as the notion ran through his head that you may never want to speak with him again. 
################
@dashingdeb16 @myherometalhead @micheledawn1975 @hardladyheart @chelebelletx @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @paleidiot
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yjhzies · 5 months ago
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“Silly pranks.” — Yoon Jeonghan
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⸝⸝୭ ˚. fluff . soft . pinch of angst
⋆ pairings : jeonghan x f!reader ⋆ warning : none! (let me know if there is ^^) ⋆ wc : 0.8k [✉️] · never in a million years, did Jeonghan think that you can get mad at his silly pranks.
⋆ - note : I SWEAR THERE IS BASICALLY NO ANGST. angst is not for me chat, im sorry 😟 bcz believe me or not, i WILL find a way to add full fluff to an angsty story bcz thats just how i am and im not the strongest to see a whole depressing story unfold before my eyes knowing i can fix it 😔😔
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Jeonghan knew you never got mad at his silly pranks; instead, you went along with them.
It was the weekend, so Jeonghan and the boys had a day off. You had left early in the morning for somewhere important, and Jeonghan could not help but sulk about it. You had not even told him before leaving; he found out by calling you. He tried calling the members to see if anyone was free to hang out, but everyone was preoccupied with their own work.
And Yoon Jeonghan always wants to be entertained, which right now, he wasn't.
That is how, just like any other day, he had pulled a prank on you. What he didn't expect though, is that he was gonna regret every bit of it later.
You had called Jeonghan to let him know you would be back around 4 p.m., which was the perfect time to carry out his plan. It was not particularly unique; all he was going to do was jump out of nowhere and scare you.
It didn't take long for you to arrive home.
"Hannie, I'm ho—"
"BOO!!!"
You flinch and scream, dropping your bag to the ground. Jeonghan let out an evil giggle.
"Yoon Jeonghan! I'm gonna kill you one day!" With a shout, you grab your bag and head to your shared bedroom. Jeonghan just stood there, astounded, staring at you as you hurried off. He quickly realised he messed up, and hastily trailed behind you.
"Baby!" he called out, following you to your bedroom. "Baby, are you mad? I'm sorry—" You shut the door on his face, causing him to pause and pout.
"Baby..." he whined, fidgeting on the doorknob and pouting. "I'm sorry, I had no intention to make you mad, trust me!" He said, followed by silence, as he hoped you would hear him and open the door, but you did not.
He sighed, looking down at the floor. To stop the tear that was about to fall down his cheek, he took a deep breath. He had no idea you would get mad, you've never gotten mad at him before.
He walked slowly over to the couch and threw himself down, sinking into the fabric. "I'm sorry..." He mumbled to himself and stared at the locked bedroom door.
Hours passed, and Jeonghan was still waiting for you, pouting. His face lit up as the door unlocked, revealing you. He leaped from the couch and came running toward you as soon as you entered the kitchen.
He followed you like a puppy, calling you "Baby," as you reached to open the refrigerator. "Please don't be mad, I just wanted to do a harmless prank."
His shoulders slumped as he followed you around the kitchen, not receiving a response. He frowned when he noticed you take a frozen snack from the fridge.
"Why are you gonna eat that? I made you your favourite dish with the help of a guide book."
"I don't want to eat it."
You knew you were being petty, but you couldn't help it. And a part of you also wanted to see THE Yoon Jeonghan being a simp for you.
"Why not...!" He whined, wrapping his arms around your torso from behind, snuggling his forehead against your neck and stomping his feet.
"Do you know how long it took me to cook that? I nearly burned down the kitchen." He spoke, his voice cracking at the end of the sentence. He was not about to cry—actually, he was—but he despised the idea of you being so angry at him that you refused to eat his food.
When you heard his voice falter, you snapped to attention as he fixed his gaze on your shoulder. His eyes were clear of tears, but his bottom lip was stuck out in a huge pout as he absent-mindedly traced patterns on your stomach with his fingers.
With wide puppy eyes, he gazed at you when you fully turned to face him. You smile and extend your arms for him to hug you. His eyes widen, his face brightens, and he squeals before squeezing closer to you and resting his head on your shoulder.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you mad." His voice muffled by your shirt, he apologized.
"It's okay, I'm sorry too." You coo as you pat his back. "I overreacted anyways, you were just doing a silly little prank."
"I promise I won't prank you ever again."
"Why not? I love your pranks." You frowned, and Jeonghan smiled against your shirt.
"Baby," he mumbled. "Can I get a kiss?" he asked quietly. Right now, you would want nothing more than to kiss his pout away.
You smile and gently cup his cheek, lifting his head off your shoulder before leaning in for a kiss on his lips. His smile was softer than usual, definitely not the teasing kind he was known for right now.
"I'm sorry, again."
"Don't be, it's not your fault." You peck his lips again, and just as you were about to pull back, Jeonghan leaned in and kissed your lips again, this time sweetly and deeply.
The fact that you could feel his gentleness and sincerity in the kiss was enough to convince you that he never wants to make you mad again.
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luminique · 27 days ago
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hii hii lumii !! I ADORE your interpretation of lighter so far— I love him smm
anyways, I hope my req is okay but I was wondering if you could do a comfort fic ? maybe reader has been a lil distant lately and just in some feels and he gives them a lil talk after being blown off here and there to find out they were having issues w their mental health and not feeling good enough and maybe he’s caught off guard because reader is usually so out going and always has a smile on their face and to see them feel so small makes him wanna take care of them so much and gives them so much reassurance and gentle kisses and cuddles 👉👈
I hope it’s okay !! I’ve been in the feels lately
hi anonn !! im gonna answer this one first because i've been in the feels too and i think we all deserve some reassurance, especially after all of the sad lighter story.
i don't take lighter for the kind to be too intrusive. that's not to say that he doesn't notice the way you're staring off into the distance, as if always having something on your mind. or the way you left earlier than usual for the SoC's nightly hangouts around the fire. or the way you had just been distancing yourself from him.
maybe you just needed a day, or two, and so he waited. he waited, and waited, but it just seemed like it was getting worse. he was beginning to get anxious, coming up with possibilities and worse case scenarios. even his favorite grape-flavored lollipop couldn't reduce the anxiety that was building up inside of him as he followed after you one night.
he shook off his nerves, spending quite a bit of time at the front door of your lodging while in blazewood. mentally practicing what to say so that he wouldn't make things even worse than they already were. one step, two deep breaths, three knocks on your door. he cleared his voice, usually confident and smooth but now carried a hint of worry in it.
"hey, uh... everything alright?"
you could hear the ruffling of his jacket, the soft metal clinks of his gloves. he didn't dare open the door until you allowed him to, so he waited, just like he always had. "lighter? yeah, everything's fine," was that a slight crack in your voice? no, no, he had to have imagined that. he knew it was wrong but he had waited long enough. he turned the knob, opening the door just a little bit but still not walking in.
"you don't have to tell me everything. just... know that i'll be here, waiting for you." he wasn't the best at comforting, nor was he good at even navigating these sorts of things but at the very least, he wanted you to have the knowledge that you had him. it didn't take long for you to finally get up, opening the door that separated the both of you. you looked so... different. the light absent from your eyes, the edges of your lips normally turned upwards but now they weren't. if he couldn't say what you wanted to hear, maybe you'd understand through his actions.
his arms wrapped around you. squeezing you just a little tighter than usual as he somehow made the both of you waddle backwards into your room. he had kept his gloves in his pants, not wanting to hurt you even more with them. his embrace was a familiar warmth, like the fire during particularly cold nights in the outer ring. you could hear his heart racing, was it from nervousness? anxiety? fear? even he didn't know.
he took this as an opportunity to place soft kisses on the top of your head but then stopped all of a sudden. he turned around to the door and realized that it was still wide open. he kicked it close with his foot, feeling embarrassed at the fact that he had to stop because of something so minor. he wanted you to feel safe, to have privacy, to be able to breathe without others barging in. technically, he had invaded this space of yours but you were slowly melting into him, as if you had been waiting for this too.
every passing second hugging you, kissing you, it made his own worries disappear. he hoped the same for you as you slowly spoke to him about your own problems. as he listened, he'd pause every once in while to give you a deadpan stare. not because he was making fun of you or anything, but it genuinely baffled him how you could say such things about yourself. you felt so insecure about yourself and your image, about being with him, being with the SoC. he had to physically stop himself from just blurting "i love you" every time you said something so degrading.
instead, he chose to wait and listen. his calloused hands gently caressing yours, his lips pressing kisses on the side of your head as you nuzzled into him. he loves you for who you are, the person in front of him, not the image that you had made yourself out to be in your mind. but he waits for you to let it all out before he says anything else. he will wait, he will listen, he will always be there for you.
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gyuswhore · 2 years ago
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How to Win Hearts for Dummies (the answer is lattes and banana bread)
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Idol!mingyu x makeup-artist!reader
genre: fluff, angst, one sided pining
warnings: slow burn, swearing, shitty bosses, some descriptions of anxiety and breakdowns, one sided pining, reader has issues opening up (lmk if there's anything else)
13.4k words (im sorry)
plot: This apprenticeship was taking a toll on your self control in the worst possible way. Walking in 8 months ago, a resignation from your corporate job and a dream in your pocket, you made an oath to stay focused on the goal at hand and to enjoy what you did for a living for once; makeup. Except, your still stuck as an apprentice with a mentor that has no inclination for your growth.
And you’re a little bit in love with your client.
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(A/N): repost bc Tumblr wouldn’t show it in the tags!!! Thank you for clicking on this clonking my pants as I hit post ! I started working on this at the beginning of exam season and I’m posting it the night before my last exam 🥲 what a full circle moment. Also pls excuse any inconsistencies or grammatical errors, my beta reader, unlike me, actually cares ab her grades and is in the beginning of exam season and therefore will not be able to read through this monstrosity for a while lmao. Enjoy hehe
Edit: I’ve just realised how many mistakes and grammatical errors I’ve made throughout the fic, serves me right for proofreading at 3 AM after a stats exam. I’ll try to fix them all asap!!! 
The camera goes off again with a distinct click. And again. And again. And again.
The camera had gone off innumerable times since Mingyu walked out in another themed ensemble, and you were there, watching, through all of it.
You watched as he kept switching positions, rotating his body and his head. Morphing his features into more variations of dazed and serious than you thought could ever exist.
Standing there, at the portable table behind the main setup, attempting to clean a lip brush that would be needed soon when the inevitable call for-
“Makeup over here! We’re taking 5”
You note your sluggish pace as you snap out of your daze and scrubbing harder with the removal cloth. Snapping your head down, hoping nobody noticed your incessant heart eyes, you realize you were in trouble now.
‘Y/n, you’ve been cleaning that brush since I left 10 minutes ago!’ The senior makeup artist snapped.
You finish up the brush in hand and quickly hand her what she needs, not before rummaging for the tiny pot of lip product you absent-mindedly packed away.
‘Sorry, really sorry’ you choke out before she leaves in her badly concealed irritated expression. You see her make a beeline for a waiting Mingyu, who adorably squats for the woman so she has better access.
This apprenticeship was taking a toll on your self control in the worst possible way. Walking in 8 months ago, a resignation from your corporate job and a dream in your pocket, you made an oath to stay focused on the goal at hand and to enjoy what you did for a living for once; makeup. Except, your still stuck as an apprentice with a mentor that has no inclination for your growth.
And you’re a little bit in love with your client.
It's not that you were overage (your mother begs to differ), but considering you were on your second big girl job and still no sign of a potential lover, the prospect was starting to weigh on your head. The first rattling experience was when one of your closest friends announced her engagement, your thoughts still stuck in a 19 year old you considered she was too young. She was not, in fact, 19, or too young, but a perfectly acceptable age to consider marriage with someone she loved, you had soon realized. You were never one for the dating scene, but you were always one to don your Dr. Love labcoat whenever an emotionally bruised friend would come seeking help. You were good at advice, but awfully bad at applying it yourself.
Coming into this job, surrounded by a plethora of beautiful people, your heart would be of stone if it weren’t to waver.
The gong of unattainability had struck the second you laid eyes on Mingyu, laughing at something Hoshi had shown him on the phone. There he was, hair and makeup-less, looking like he had just rolled out of bed (which he had), and beautiful as ever. Beginning this new chapter with a bang, only problem was that it turned into an 8 month shoot out. Having encountered a number of gorgeous people, you’d learned to appreciate their genetic lottery pull and move on. But never had a single look left you as breathless and unbeared as that one, fateful look at Mingyu. One of the team members was busy assuring you not to worry too much about the pandemonium in the dressing room, that everyone would handle it and you were only asked to observe and help with smaller things as instructed; for now. You weren’t listening too hard though.
You were now adjusted to the chaos that comeback season and 13 men plus staff in a microscopic dressing room brought about. But you will never forget how in the midst of your first rain of hell, Mingyu had asked you to pass his phone.
‘Please?’ He had said, and you slammed your hand with a force of a woman infatuated on the table behind you and (literally) breathed out the first thing you had ever said to him.
‘Here’
He smiled and gave you a quick ‘thanks’.
There was no coming back after he flashed you those irresistible canines, and to this day, you wonder what nation you saved in a previous life to be able to have him know your name, hear it roll off his tongue in his pretty voice as he asks you to fix his smudged eyeliner.
You sigh defeatedly before your mentor slash irritated makeup artist shoves her load back in your hands and instructs you to come inside to pack up. It’s become routine for you now, as you begin to pack up the bigger palettes and tools, handing a ready-to-go-home Junhui the pack of makeup wipes he asked for, zipping up bags and closing tubs of outfits. It's an organized chaos but one everybody has grown to work around.
Mingyu is done before you, as he removes his jewelry and begins to shrug off his jacket. You scramble to find the clothes he came in and his coat, pointedly ignoring the familiar scent of wood. He thanks you and shucks off the remainder of his clothing, he might be used to stripping in front of professional staff, but you look away regardless for your own sanity.
Helping the last stylists hang the final jacket, you grab your bag and get ready to leave in your own car. Mingyu has left, not before throwing a “you did well, thank you!” over his shoulder at the remaining people in the room and leaving for the honking car outside.
***
Your mashing bananas in a bowl at 12 AM when you start thinking. Impulsive baking sessions had become a norm since you started working with Seventeen, needing to keep yourself occupied to stop spiraling. Mingyu was a recurring topic (surprise surprise), but one that quickly faded when you begin to think about what the future holds for you. You start mashing the banana harder. You consider the idea that you can’t complain, being in a position some of the most well seasoned pros had difficulty reaching. Being a single young woman and being allowed so close to some of the most unattainable men was seen as near impossible. You’d like to think it was your skill that got you here but can never seem to fully rule out a processing error.
It’s hard, being stuck in the same place. Your apprenticeship should have ended 2 months ago, but even if it had, you’d still be doing the same thing. The senior artist trusts no-one but a select few to work on the boys for photoshoots, events, music videos. People like you are left to sanitize sponges and clean the fallout.
You crack an egg on the counter and it splits open entirely, falling on the floor, yolk and all. Your inability to grow stays within the idea that you can’t really do your artistry like you want.
And how you never learn to crack your eggs on the bowl.
***
Showing up on the Going Seventeen set, you rush to the dressing room way earlier than you should. Being completely honest, you’re really only rushing because you want to maneuvere yourself to do Mingyu’s makeup before somebody else snags him. This was one of the very few engagements where you were occasionally allowed to take charge on makeup. Not that it was required for the show much at all; intensity and occasion wise. Your rare (possible) moment to (maybe) come into Mingyu’s organic notice was an opportunity never to be dropped by you.
You help setting up everything on the counters as the boys begin to (loudly) file in the rooms. You see Mingyu walk in and move to ask him to sit down once he’s done discarding his coat. He was first in line and you ‘happened’ to be the first one ready to begin working.
‘Is the eye makeup heavy? I just got a sty removed and I don’t know if I should be putting anything on at all.’ He asks as he sits down and you ready your damp sponge.
‘Not really, just smoothing things out. It should be fine.’ you say as you begin to press the compact on his cheek.
Your not really sure why, because you’ve never been able to muster anything above brief replies when in contact with him, but something in you pushes you to keep talking.
‘I’m surprised they even asked for us, they rarely ever do’ you continue, heart pounding so hard you’re afraid he might hear it.
He breathes out a laugh ‘Yeah. They even started advertising the show on youtube and subway stations and stuff, I didn’t know until I saw someone talk about it online’
You smile at his response ‘Well, all of you work so hard, it's about time they pull this to a high scale production’
‘It's never really work if your having fun, we try to be ourselves on here’ He replies, still smiling slightly.
You’re damn near close to collapsing on the floor at this point. This is the longest conversation you’ve ever had with him. You opt to smile in response as you start to concentrate on his eyebrows. The rest of his face is done far too soon as you zone out and do what you do best.
‘All done’ you announce as you pull away from his lips, trying not to have yoour gaze linger.
“Y/n! Can you start on Vernon if you're done?’, another artist calls from behind.
‘Yeah, he can come up!’ you reply as Mingyu (regretfully) walks towards hair.
Just because you sew your mouth shut with Mingyu doesn’t mean it applies for the rest of them, you’re quite friendly with all of them and Vernon does well to remind you as he sits down and quips a ‘hey bestieee’ in an elongated greeting.
You audibly laugh ‘That’s another word I’ll be hearing for the next month’
‘Regretfully so’ He feigns sympathy.
‘Be quiet and look up’ you say with a fond smile before you get started on him.
***
You sit on the floor in front of your television, trail mix on the coffee table as the movie plays as background noise for your thoughts - again.
There’s a smile on your face, but you dont notice as you think about the small talk you made with Mingyu today, wondering if it could become a regular occurrence if you learned to keep your heart and mind in check.  
You were never one to stand up and take effort to do what was right for you, which is why you were talked into choosing Business Administration by your friend in highschool, who you never speak to now because she decided to ditch you for another group who were more inclined to shuttle themselves to liver failure by partying every last weekend in your entire college career. You were talked into applying to corporate jobs by your counsellors as you started looking for make-up courses, needing to abandon your dream for the second time when you landed a decent entry level desk job. It took years before you decided to choose yourself for once and made the big leap after multiple courses you had took on the side. Life was starting to look bright after getting hired here, but you’re not sure if you overrode a high or if you went back to your old zipped mouth state after you settled in. Never sure if you expected too much or if things really were as stagnant as they felt.
***
Overmanifestation can be a thing. You're not really sure how it works but you’re reaping what you’ve sowed right about now.
You’re currently standing in an offside corridor in a hotel lobby, clad in a pretty white floral dress, and a nervous, fidgety Mingyu standing in front of you.
'I know I'm asking you to do something difficult and I know it seems pointless because I'm not doing anything wrong either that you have to lie about it'
This was supposed to be a staycation with your friends for you to relax and get your mind off things. Your ticket to relaxation has become a nightmare.
'And I understand I'm being super unreasonable but I'm really trying to keep it on the down-low as we get to know each other'
You were waiting with your friends on the couches positively stuffing your faces with the complimentary chocolate bowl placed on the coffee table as a couple other friends checked you guys into your rooms. You were laughing and talking with your group, carefree and ready to have a week of well deserved rest.
That was the plan anyway. Until you see someone across the lobby, also in line at check in. He had an unmistakable toothy smile,and was hand in hand with a concealed brunette.
Your smile abruptly falls in disbelief as you feel your world halt around you.
The same hands come up to brush the hair out of the woman's face to place a kiss on her temple, smiling wide.
The nauseating feeling of ice going down your spine is becoming more and more apparent. You attempt to swallow the lump in your throat but it's like trying to swallow a brick. You lick your lips and attempt to look away but your eyes keep feeding on the picture you painted yourself in your worst nightmares. Realizing you're on the brink of possible hyperventilation, your friend drops her head and asks you if you're okay. You look up at her, not knowing what to say as you realize that nodding furiously will convince her.
Mingyu has a girlfriend.
Of course he would. What were you thinking? This man is one of the most eligible bachelors in the country, why on earth would he be single? You’re unhinged, you decide, for thinking you may have a chance, when the woman turns around and you see her in full. She’s gorgeous.
A part of you still wants to believe that you're officially past the point of sanity and that you've begun to see Mingyu in every tall man. The universe, however, is cruel. He pushes his head up and in your general direction, and locks eyes with you in unmistakable recognition.
He stops smiling.
So here you are listening to Mingyu asking you to keep this a secret from the company, to forget the woman waiting for him in the lobby.
You can only nod in slight motions as he goes on his rant to justify his oath to secrecy, managing a tight lipped smile as you miraculously find your voice, hoarse as it may be.
'Don't worry about it, I understand' - ouch - 'it's none of my business anyway. I'll keep my lips sealed, I promise'
'Thank you, thank you, thank you I appreciate it so much, you don't even know. I'll repay you soon I promise'
'No, please, it's not-'
'No, Y/n I will. You're being really good to me right now and I'm so grateful. I'm sorry for putting you through this while you're off from work and with friends. It's worth to me that your listening and understanding'
You're tired. You want nothing but for him to stop talking. So you smile again and shake your head.
'I'm sure your friends are waiting, I won't keep you. I'll see you soon though!'
And with that he leaves. Back to the lobby where you see him take the woman by hand once again. You watch again as they walk to the elevators, stepping in and disappearing when the doors close. You watch the floor number rise.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5…
You walk back to your laughing friends before you can see where they got off.
***
Retiring to your shared hotel room with Chaeyoung, you fall back first into the crisp sheets and mattress.
'Why're you so depressed dude, did Mingyu say something to you?' She asks, a slight line forming between her brows.
'I'm fine, I've been up since 5 today it's just fatigue hitting me right now' you reassure, like always. 'I might not go to dinner with you guys, might end up with my face in the soup at some point'
Chaeyoung hums. ‘Take the night off so you can gear up for the rest of the week. I'm letting you off for now but I expect full attendance for eveything else we do', finishing with a mocking stern look.
'Yes ma'am' you feign salute from the bed, mimicking her stern tone.
You've known Chaeyoung for quite a while now, meeting her in your last year of uni. Trusting her as you do, you were never fully able to fess up about your feelings for Mingyu. Fear of judgment wasn't the problem, but more so the strange feeling of shame that overcomes you when you think about talking about it with other people. It's quite beyond you, why you act this way. You loved your friends and you knew they would support you with everything, they'd proved it when you'd made one of the most difficult decisions of your life while leaving your job. But the idea of having the audacity to love someone who could never do the same seemed like a feat of embarrassment.
Who are you, y/n? Who are you to have foolish dreams of a girl in love? With someone clearly fit for all things greater than you?
Maybe this was a good thing, you thought, the weird feeling in your stomach returning. Maybe this was the universe telling you to give up and move on, a kind of rejection that keeps your dignity. This was nothing but a reality check, a sign from whatever wants best for you, to bring your attention back to what brought you to Mingyu in the first place.
***
You didn’t see Mingyu for the rest of the trip, which you were grateful for not knowing how you’d react if you had to see him so soon after, that.
Back massaged and head clearer than it had been for weeks, you feel more in control of your feelings and thoughts regarding your life. You hope the conversation with Mingyu was the last stressful thing you’d encounter for a while.
It’s almost comeback season, you realise as you see the new concept photos while scrolling on your couch at home. This meant insanely early mornings for weeks on end, but you had to push through for your own sake. You’d come out of multiple comebacks needing a brace for a month but you wouldn’t trade it for the world. Never realising the true meaning of learning through experience, you were enlightened as you entered this new, very hands on field. The concept looked interesting, hoping the scraps of makeup you’d be allowed to do would be fun for you.
That ended up being true when you were, for the first time, asked to do Hoshi’s full makeup for their first comeback broadcast.
Your stumped silence was short lived as you hastily oblige and get the chair ready for him. You’d looked at the demo sheets and face charts too much for someone who wasn’t actually going to be asked to do much, but you see it pay off as you finish his eyes and get started on the rest of his face. It was easy for you to zone out as Soonyoung had passed out not even 5 minutes in, having someone hold his face as you worked.
You felt your chest swell with an indesipherable feeling as you watched him get up with your mastery on his face; pride, was it? You were getting emotional for no reason. Your attention, however, is moved sharply when you hear someone tell Mingyu it was his turn, finding him plopped on your chair staring straight into nothingness as he’d just been rudely awoken from his nap. He doesn’t realise it’s you for a solid minute as he tried to remember his own name.
‘Oh, hello’ he says, sort of confused. ‘Sorry, just give me minute’, he mumbles as he rubs his eyes.
He stretches back onto his seat signalling he’s ready for you to get started. You trying not to feel too much in your stomach as you begin.
You’re powdering his forehead when he says “I know I already said this but I really appreciate what you’re doing”
You know he’s talking about the conversation at the hotel, you were hoping you could avoid it.
“I told you not to worry about it, honest.” You reply, and somehow manage to choke out “It makes me happy that you’re happy”
You can see him trying to fight a smile, “Thank you for saying that”.
You wanted to stab someone. But you opt for gently brushing a base colour across his eyes.
“Do any of us know her, by any chance?” You ask cautiously.
“I dont think so. We met through mutual friends at a Christmas dinner, we didn’t start talking till she had to bring me a bunch of papers I’d left at my mom’s that day.” his face depicts someone reminiscing a fond memory.
It was cute, how it seemed like fate was trying to bring them together. It would've been cuter if you weren’t in a one sided pining with one of the two lovers.
“Well, I hope it works out for the both of you”
No you don’t.
“I hope so too”
You don’t hope that at all.
You felt guilty, feeling all of this. Hated that this was your first response to him wanting to be happy. Never would you have imagined stooping this low, hoping his happiness doesn’t work out for your sake. You’d like to owe it this being your first real infatuation, but you can’t help but wonder if this was really what you thought.
You decided to focus on the good news for today, that you’re finally allowed to do your actual job. You can only hope this wasn’t a temporary advancement, allowing time to tell.
Things remained the same the following day, much to your absolute elation. You were done doing 4 people’s makeup and was just winding down to take a break, quite satisfied with yourself. You observed as the rest of the boys got their hair done and run around, half in their outfits. You stifle a snort as you watch Jeonghan hide Minghao’s socks in his pockets as the boy tried to find them to put his shoes on, the former continuing to sip on his coffee seemingly unaware.
“Y/n, have you seen my socks? The green ones with the leaves on it?” Hao inevitable asks you.
You’re forced to feign confusion when Jeonghan pokes his head behind him signalling you to keep up the charade. He continues to look and you’re just about to have mercy on the poor boy before a to-go cup of coffee is shoved in front of your face.
You look up at the person and it’s Mingyu extending his arm at you expectantly.
“Oh, I didn’t order anything” you start, thinking you’re clearing up a confusion.
“I know you didn’t, got one for you anyway.”
There’s a record screech in your brain as you absorb his words.
“Think of it as me trying to repay the favour”
Oh. I see.
You’re a little embarrassed thinking he’d get one for you in that way, not when he had someone waiting on him. You accept the cup and mumble a thank you as he unexpectedly plants himself on the couch next to you.
“I saw you drinking lattes a lot of the times, so I just got you that. Hope that’s okay”.
Your silent for a moment before replying “Yes!” a little bit too loudly, eyes widening a little realisng your lack of volume control.
He knows your coffee order.
“Yes,” you say again in a normal tone and a slight laugh to cover up your inability to read the room, “They’re my favourite actually”
Kim Mingyu knows you like latte’s. This wasn’t good for your delusional brain.
Your conversation is cut short when the boys are called for roll call before they can prepare for the actual stage. You watch him get up and leave to file into the overstuffed elevators, not before he throws you the most adorable wave you’ve ever seen. You can’t hold back your smile as you wave back and look down at the drink he got you before taking a sip.
***
As it turns out, you did makeup for the rest of their comeback season, and Mingyu, without fail, got you an iced latte every single day before leaving to go on stage.
You tried to get him to stop, but he was rooted in his position and you didn’t have it in you to say no to his pleading eyes. It was a re-charge for you, when you’d seen him break into a happy smile, prominent canines that you’d grown to adore. He’d done more than enough to ‘repay’ you for swearing to secrecy, and you felt like you too, should  should repay him the balance.
So here you were, making banana bread in your kitchen again, careful to remember to crack your eggs on the rim of your mixing bowl instead of slamming them on the counter. You’re stirring the flour in when a classified devious thought occurs to you.
These past two weeks were pivotal for both you and Mingyu, daily coffee’s meant daily conversations, which meant getting to know one another more. You’d exchanged phone numbers in the midst of all of this, to which ensued the agenda of staying up till midnight talking to each other about the meaning of life.
Setting down the whisk, you pick up your phone and sent the text before you chickened out.
[You]: I have a surprise for you.
[You]: You wanna come over? It’s better enjoyed fresh lol
[Mingyu]: Ma’am? 👁👁
[Mingyu]: That sounds a whole lot like a booty call
[You]: *attachment*
[Mingyu]: IS THAT CAKE??
[Mingyu]: omw ����‍💨
You send the location and set your phone down, a jittery feeling going through your entire body. There’s a spring in your step as you slide the loaf into the oven and set a timer. You turn around your kitchen island and register the pigsty that is your apartment. The girls were over the night before and you had done nothing to enlighten the aftermath, pillows strewn across the entire living room and snack wrappers in places you’re not sure how they landed.
By the time you’re done and spritzed the place with some of your nicer perfumes, your taking the loaf out of the oven and on a rack to cool.
Ever the punctual man, you hear the doorbell ring just as your taking your oven mitts off.
Hoping you’ve done enough to your apartment to save yourself from embarrassment, you collect yourself and open the door for him through your ringcam. He’s barely through when your rushing towards your doorway.
“Hi!”
“Hey,” he grunts as he tries to slip off his shoes.
“‘aight, where’s my cake?” he demands once he’s done giving you a quick hug.
You roll your eyes and usher him to the kitchen, “First of all, appreciate how excited you are to see me, and second, its banana bread not cake, sorry to burst your bubble”
He responds to your grumbling with an “Oh come on, you can't put freshly baked goods on the agenda and expect me to pay particular attention to anything else”.
He has his trademarked grin and cheesy stare out on display like its nobody’s business, you want to slap it off of him in the most loving way possible, but you settle with a tiny “shut up”.
“I brought warm coffee this time, thought it’d go better” He sets the to-go carrier on the kitchen counter, following you to where you were attempting to slice the still hot banana bread on a tray.
“Oh, that was a good idea” you say.
“Where’re your plates and forks?” he asks, pulling out the drawers and cabinets you signal to.
It all felt too domestic for your weak heart to handle. Not to say it didn’t warm you to the core how comfortable he felt in your space, you did, more than you’d care to admit. But he needed to tone it down before you required an organ transplant.
You were seated on the floor, butts parked on floor cushions, backs against the couch. The coffee table held all of your goods while you both argued on which movie to watch.
“I can’t believe you haven’t watched any of the Harry Potter movies! No, we’re watching philosopher’s stone, I don’t care!” You shout in disbelief, already typing it into the search bar on the TV.
“Philly-philo- bro I can’t even pronounce it why would I watch that?!” He yells back, snatching the remote from you.
You’re both a giggling, screaming mess on the floor as you keep trying to steal the remote from each other, not stopping until one of you bumps into the table and you almost spill hot coffee all over yourselves.
You decide to call a truce and pick another movie entirely.
Just as you’re pressing play, Mingyu takes a bite of the still (surprisingly) warm banana bread and you watch as his eyes roll to the back of his head.
“This is so good” He says, his faced furrowed as he goes in for another bite. “Did you lace this with something, why is this so good?”
You’re biting back a snarky remark but you let it rip anyway; “It’s cuz these pretty hands made it”
You splay your hands out in front of your face, like your showing him your rings, fingers wiggling and a cheeky smile on your face.
He looks unimpressed as he scoffs. He swallows before saying: “At least you didn’t call the secret ingredient love or something”
“Excuse you, I’m pretty sure I heard you say that in some Gose episode” You remark.
He turns to you, all smug: “So your saying you watch Gose? Like, regularly?”
You immediately turn away from his taunting smirk, “Sometimes, if it shows up on my home page”
You take a sip of your latte before he asks you another sweat producing question.
“Oh, but you pay attention to me the most don’t you? Don’t you?”
He’s poking fun at you, you know that. But a paranoid part of you can’t help but think he’s onto you and your feelings.
So you say something maybe a little bit below the belt.
“You sure have a knack for seeking validation from the world when you have a partner already giving that to you”
The words tumble out of your mouth before you know it. In your defence, you're doing this for a greater cause, but it's still a relief when you see him comically gasp, hand to his diaphragm.
“Just because your alone in life, doesn’t mean you need to be salty about other people receiving actual love” He spits back.
Your sputtering trying to think of a response. Deserved.
He grabs a slice of the bread and shoves into your mouth to shut you up once and for all. You’re left chewing the mouthful and staring at him in shock.
He giggles and takes a sip of coffee, satisfied with himself. When he sets it down he opens his mouth to speak. Closes it again, like he re-evaluating, and finally decides to say something. He’s serious now.
“Ji Eun and I, decided it wasn’t gonna work out between us”.
Oh.
“Oh.”
He blows a raspberry and lets out a meek laugh.
“Yeah, oh. It’s whatever, it wasn’t meant to work out. Better sooner than later.”
You’re trying to find the words to reply or comfort him.
“Do you wanna talk about it?” You ask him, being careful to not lace your voice with pity, but more neutral and open. “You don’t have to, obviously, but it might be better to talk about what’s bothering you”
He pauses for a moment before starting.
“She wasn’t sitting very well with the idea that she had to share me. Like at all. She wouldn’t say it but she’d get mildly infuriated when I’d blow the fans a kiss or something, or interacted with the staff too much. I was getting home quite late certain days during comeback season and I’d find her outside the dorm at like 11 PM. It was embarrassing when all of the other members would see her there, obviously upset and basically yelling at me for, for - for literally just doing my job.I guess all the smaller things just started piling and she couldn’t take it. I tried so hard to make sure she felt wanted and secure in the relationship but nothing felt like it was ever enough. She was evasive or confrontational all at the wrong times and it came to a point- its a horrible thought to have in a relationship - but I was terrified she’d do something rash and I’d wake up to my face on articles for some reason - again”
You recollected the past couple years when Mingyu was thrown around in the media for a new accusation seemingly everyday. You weren’t involved with anything regarding the industry back then, but you’d heard enough news to be aware of what was happening.
Your heart swelled with sadness as you heard him talk, he sounded like he was trying- trying hard to be good enough. All for a person who seemed to have their priorities set somewhere else.
“She was amazing; kind and happy and confident. She treated my parents with respect, she was best friends with my sister. I know we only lasted like 3 months but at some point I really considered that she could be the one. But then the problems started and I realized she was only becoming an added factor to stress and anxiety for me more than anything else.
“I liked her because she was so family oriented, and I thought that was what would fit me because I’m like that too. But, I guess I’m just a different kind of oriented? I don’t know. I have a job that’s both interpersonal and unpredictable. There’s days where I don’t wanna get up and do work but I still love it nonetheless. I guess she just expected me to have a predictable, stable 9 to 5. Home in time for dinner, not requiring interaction with too many people; basically everything I can’t be.”
He’s silent for a moment.
You start talking after a couple beats.
“I really hope you aren’t taking this like it’s your fault. She made a choice to put up with your work, knowing how it would be for the both you. You tried your best but she made you feel like your best wasn’t good enough. I dunno about you, but that sounds like a really problematic conclusion. If she truly cared for you and what you love, she would never have been this unsupportive or not understanding”.
He’s listening to you, his expression is blank but you can tell he’s absorbing your words.
“I’d like to think I had realized that. But being completely honest, I’m not really sure when my thoughts go back to me thinking I’m the problem all the time.”
He manages a smile, a wide one, as he looks up to make eye contact with you; “But I know it’ll take me some time to really start believing that it’s not entirely my fault. We just weren’t compatible, and that’s fine. We left on good terms, and I’m happy about that.”
You smile with him as he finishes, but your a little confused when he starts sliding closer and down the cushions.
He sets his head on your shoulder.
You may have shortcircuited right then and there.
“Is this okay?” he asks you quietly, attention finally diverted to the half played movie.
You realise he asked you a question and you have to answer.
“Yeah, this is fine” You breathe out, somehow, by the graces of God himself.
No, you weren’t fine at all. You felt like the universe had flipped a faulty switch, mixed up the scripts, lost the plot, something. But as you get used to the weight of Mingyu’s head on your shoulder, you pray it won’t come back to haunt you in another chapter.
***
Your routine became inverted in the sense that, what you once had to plan out so intricately, is unfolding with no effort from you at all.
You find that Mingyu waits for you to be done with somebody else so you can do his makeup, instead of sitting on another free chair. He’d come to you specifically to touch up his makeup instead of going to an artist he saw closer to him. He never forgot to get you a coffee whenever it was that he saw you.
Mingyu hadn’t slept over that night, instead leaving in his car despite the 1 AM drizzle and your insistence for him to stay until the pour recedes.
Maybe it was better for you that he hadn’t stayed that night. Something about how you grew so close ‘organically’ made you feel like this wasn’t all in your head, that he’s choosing to be your friend.
You’re handing him his clothes as he begins to change, using the excuse to whisper to him;
“I was gonna try a new brownie recipe tonight, if you’re free you can come over?”
“I think I have somewhere to be after this but I’m free after, How’s 6?”
So there you are, back in your kitchen folding chocolate chunks into your brownie batter while waiting for Mingyu to get here.
Your phone dings from the island and you check to see a message from Mingyu sending you what looked like a grocery list; pasta, oregano, garlic…
[Mingyu]: Tell me what you don’t have from this
[Mingyu]: I’m at the store rn hurry up
You send him a list of what you don’t have, realising he intended to have dinner with you too.
[Mingyu]: k thanks
[Mingyu]: be there in like an hour
There’s a warm feeling that’s swelling in your chest, that makes you wanna punch a wall because your so happy. You choose self control, mostly because this apartment is on a lease but also you’d probably break your knuckles trying to punch anything harder than a foam mat.
By the time Mingyu’s here, the brownies are in the oven and you’re almost done with the icing. He unpacks the groceries (and the warm lattes) he bought while you finish up, confirming that he was trying a new pasta recipe tonight. Setting the brownies and coffee down on your usual coffee table, you decide wait a couple hours before starting on making dinner, instead choosing to hear him ramble about an idol he met at an award show.
“So, we start talking before we’re ready to go up- you weren’t there you were working on wonwoo’s makeup- and he starts complimenting me and so obviously I start complimenting him back”
He’s waving his arms around, and setting positions with coasters on the table trying to explain the setting.
“He asks me if I have a sister and I’m like… yes? Which I should’ve realised where this was going because he then” - he pauses to take a deep breath - “this absolute asshat decides it’d be funny to ask me for her number because apparently ‘if you’re this hot, I’m sure any sibling you have is too’ BRO, WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU SAY THAT - how are laughing at this?!”
You calm yourself down for a second to clarify, “NO! It’s just hilarious how he thought that was okay to say”
You’re still still giggling in shock when Mingyu calms down, now also laughing incredulously.
“But actually though, please tell me you smacked him” you manage.
“I would have,” he grumbles “I got called to fix my hair cuz I ruined it or something”.
“Oh well, now you know who to avoid next time,” you say as you guide a bite of brownie into his mouth, “Forget about it now, eat sugar, it’ll help”
He chews a bit before swallowing, all while you’re watching him with an endeared smile on your face.
“Y’know, I really thought you didn’t like me when you first joined the team”
You pause mid sip of your coffee, brows furrowed, “What do you mean?”
“You never really talked me, did you? You were friendly with the rest of them but it just seemed like you never wanted to enter a room if you saw me there”
You’re looking at him in utter shock, this man was mistaking your avoidant (yet also pushy) teenage crush behaviour for dislike.
He’s looking at you expectantly, a little pout on his face.
“I never disliked you, why would you think that? I promise everything was a coincidence, it was nothing like that”
“Don’t get so defensive, kinda obvious you like me now if not before” He laughs at your panicked expression.
He meant platonic like.
“I’m sorry I made you feel like that though, I’ve been told I have a pretty serious resting bitch face, it’s gotten me in trouble before” she smile sheepishly.
“It’s fine, you made up for it with that first banana bread” He says before taking another bite of brownie, “Could use more chocolate chunks”
You snort before pushing him with a sock clad foot, “Appreciate me even giving them to you” 
You fall back to the adjacent sofa.
It’s quiet for a moment. But you feel like something’s shifted in the air.
You watch as he brings his hand to the same foot, holding onto your ankles. He’s caressing the exposed skin with his fingers, moving them back and forth. His eyes are glued to yours, looking like he’s in a trance. You’re not sure how to register this new change in mood, suddenly feeling like you need to turn the aircon on during the bleak Seoul winter. Just as you're hoping you don’t start sweating, you feel his vice grip on your ankle pull your leg over with a sharp tug. You scream as you lose support of the sofa and fall back.
You sit up in shock to find him leaning with his elbows on the floor, cackling like madman.
“Mingyu, what the fuck?”
“You-” He stops to laugh again, “You should’ve seen your face, PLEASE, it was hilarious”.
You huff before getting up shoving his shoulder with your foot again, “You’ve been playing guest a little too long, maybe it’s time you get started on that pasta”
“Will I be blessed enough to be receiving her highness’s help?” He asks.
He looks like a dream, clad in his T-shirt because he claims he doesn’t get cold. Hands behind him on the floor to give him support as he stares up at you, smiling wide. He’s looking at you with eyes full of stars and glitter.
You muster up the courage to give him a nasty glare, to which he huffs at and gets up, “Such a meanie”.
It’s hard to conceal your smile as his back his turned, sachaying towards the kitchen. You want to slap him and kiss him at the same time.
Your washing veggies in the sink when you turn around catch sight of his back as he stood at the kitchen island, sorting the rest of the ingredients. You get the same overwhelming feeling in your chest again, assuming you’re deluding yourself into thinking this is what life could be like with him. In less than 3 seconds, you’ve conjured a timeline of domestic routines, to wind down with him like this every evening.
You’re still lost in thought, still incessantly staring when he turns around and catches you in the act. He does the rude thing and snaps his fingers in front of your face to pull you out of your thoughts, “You okay?”
“Yeah” You say trying to gloss it over while busying yourself trying to find your cutting board.
“Are you sure? Do you wanna sit down at the island and watch me instead. You don’t have to help -”
“Pick a knife, and shut up dingus, it’s fine”
Once your both done eating and cleaning up, Mingyu hugs you goodbye, not before asking if you’d be free for lunch next week before he got busy the following month. You quickly agree, setting a date and time, bidding your (reluctant) farewells.
***
Once back in your apartment you realize how you can’t clean up to distract yourself because Mingyu took it upon himself to clear the space with you before he left. You sigh loudly and retire into your bedroom where you don’t have to think about how empty your living room is.
Changing into your pajamas and putting a headband on, you don’t even feel like turning your music on to do your night routine. You double cleanse, tone, serum, acid and moisturise your face with added purposefulness, taking note of the crevices of your nose and the neglected bottom of your chin. Taking extra time to make sure all of the foam is out of your skin before drying your face with a tissue.
You look at your fed skin in the mirror, and feel a weird surge of tears well in your eyes. Before they can fall you slam your bathroom cabinet to busy yourself to find your melatonin gummies, shoving them in your mouth before switching off the bathroom light and retiring to your bedroom.
Slipping the headband off and sliding into bed, you’re still chewing your gummies to a paste in your mouth. Trying not to notice how heavy you’re breathing you try to find your white noise machine, the one you found advertised for infants, and turn it on before grabbing your book to read for a few extra minutes.
Your staring at the pages like you found them to be blank. You’re phone dings next to you, signalling a notification.
Picking it up you find your mental health app sending you a daily reminder.
You’re allowed to feel your emotions.
***
Winter had run its course as you find yourself in April. You never really liked the cold, having been more sensitive to a gust of wind than the average joe, you were better suited to sitting with an aircon instead of being unable to move in the middle of Korea’s January cold rush. But alas, the cherries are blossoming and your fingers have defrosted.
That isn’t what’s on your mind right now though, as you’re standing in a Sephora, arms crossed and shoulders tense. You loved shopping for makeup, but you mostly chose to do it online unless you really had to otherwise. Parking yourself in the perfume section with the scents mixing together a cocktail of nosehair doom, you really wish you’d worn a face mask. Not to mention the migraine inducing coloured lights and mainstream pop playing in the background (you swear they’ve been playing Side to Side by Ariana Grande on loop since you got here).
These were all, however, peripheral observations for you, as you stare in absolute pneumonic shock at the number written on the price tag of the perfume you’re looking at.
Now, Mingyu is a man of class, high maintenance if you will. You’re well aware he likes to spoil himself, because he has a bank account to back it up.
Your bank account is definitely full and secure, but not enough for you to justify dropping what seems like half of its contents to something only one of the five senses can experience.
Mingyu mentioned in passing how he wanted this perfume a while ago, and knowing that he hadn’t ordered it for himself just yet, you decide to be the amazing friend that you are and surprise him for his birthday.
You may be regretting that right now, but you tentatively pick up the blue, crystalline bottle and spritz a bit on a paper strip before taking a whiff. It smelled good, that’s for sure, and it suited him too. So when the saleslady came to offer assistance, after you excused the last three, you decide you’re going to do this for him.
“Yes, could I have this in the box please?”
Walking back to your car you feel a bount of jitter run through you,
Oh, he’s gonna freak out when he sees this.
He did, in fact, freak when he saw it, and his reaction made you want to give him all of the good things in the world if you could see him like this all the time.
He’s smiling ear to ear and speaking in that high pitched voice that he gets when he’s excited. He’s thanking you over and over again, smoothing the box over in his hands repeatedly, looking at the ‘from: y/n :p’ with hearts in his eyes.
“I’m gonna save this for the rest of my life” he says, with determination and a goofy grin.
You snort at the declaration, “Sure, bud”
“I’m serious. What, you wanna bet?” he replies, taking a sip of his, latte, which you proudly credit yourself for swerving him over from Americano’s.
He insisted on going out to eat at this fancy French place a day before his actual birthday as he’d be busy on the day of, but it was risky for him to be seen eating out alone with a young woman at such a fancy place. You settled for a nicer traditional Korean restaurant, that allowed you to book a room away from possible prying eyes and one that you were both comfortable with. You decided to wait till you were back in the car with your post dinner coffee’s to give him his present.
“I’m giving you 3 months before that bottle’s dry to the dregs” You affirmed, “You smell like you empty half a bottle of something off your dresser everyday anyways”
You said it as an insult, but jokes on you because you loved the way he smelled.
“Fine, I’m gonna use this so carefully I’m not replacing it for at least a year”
“A year? What happened to the rest of your life?” you refute.
“I have you for that, don’t I”
What the fuckity fuck.
He’d turned to you, leaning on the headrest, that signature cheesy look; like he was in love or something. Voice dropping a couple octaves as he said it, laced with something defined and strong - enough for it to feel like the weight of an elephant had dropped on your chest.
You gather yourself after looking at him for a couple seconds, jaw unhinged and forgotten on the floor of his car. You chose to grab your cardigan that was neatly folded on the dash, and astral project it to his face across the seat. He’s laughing so hard there’s tears glistening in the corner of his eyes. He falls forward and you see strands of his hair fall to his face, he’d been growing them out.
“Shut up” you grumble in your seat, annoyed at how easy it was for him to send your heart through and beyond your chest.
He’s still giggling like a school girl, and you cave and give him a hint of a smile.
“There it iiiis” He announces, grabbing your face and smushing your cheeks together.
For a moment, he stops to look at you like this, like he’s contemplating. For one, brain rattling, organ exploding, microsecond, you think he might even kiss you.
Instead, he headbutts you slightly rubbing his head swiftly before letting go.
“I might need to wash my hands, I think I got your makeup on me” He mumbles, looking at his hands like a child with mud soaked palms.
“Serves you right, you buffoon,” You remark as you pull out your trusty travel pack of makeup wipes.
Yanking one out of the tab, you pull his hand over and try to wipe the remnants of foundation off, starting from the heel up to each individual finger. It’s silent as you concentrate on getting it all off both hands, he was wearing black tonight and knowing him he’d rub his hand over his pants and get beige foundation all over. You knew because you’d seen him do it one too many times.
“All done” you quip, looking up and catching his stare. He’s smooth to slowly look away and retract his open hands from your lap about 5 seconds after it became noticeable.
You busy yourself by attempting to stash away the wipes to throw out later, closing the pack of wipes and shoving them back into your bag.
He’s watching you do all of this, his stare is burning holes into the side of your head. He’s desperate to say something, but you’re not sure if you want to hear.
“Let’s go back to my place. We’ll stick a candle into a sheet brownie and call it your birthday cake. Oh, we can pick up ice cream too!”, You say, costuming your voice to sound unaffected by his vibe.
And so you did stick a candle in the fresh batch of brownies you both made at 11PM, two hours before his actual birthday. Sitting across from each other on the counter, Mingyu has his eyes closed shut, hands clasped, wearing a ridiculously coloured ‘BIRTHDAY BOY’ headband you found somewhere deep in your drawers.
“You’re gonna get wax on the brownies and they're gonna be inedible, hurry up” You groan, after everytime it seems like he’s done, he clenches his eyes shut again as he remembers another thing he has to wish for.
You’re not actually annoyed, he looks the cutest he’s ever looked, but you would appreciate non waxed brownies.
When he’s finally done, he blows out the singular candle and you clap lightly, “yay!”
You’re pulling out the candle and grabbing forks, dumping a couple scoops of ice cream on before you two start eating straight out of the pan.
Its a collection of groans as you both collapse on your couch, regretting eating all that so soon after dinner. He changed out of his dinner outfit to a T-shirt and pajama pants, he’d started keeping a set of clothes in his car when it started to become routine for him to spend regular  evenings after work at your place.
You’re in your own unicorn pajama’s, slumped over on the arm rest slightly. You feel Mingyu scooch over to put his head in your lap, claiming he was “closing his eyes for a minute”.
You knew how lightning fast he passes out, so not even 5 minutes later you start to hear his light snores. As much as you want to wake him up to move him to the bed, you know he can’t stay the night. His birthday meant he had to be with the boys, and needing to head out early tomorrow.
So you give him 10 more minutes, fingers tracing the shape of his features, in his soft hair massaging his head with your nails slightly. He had a little pout on his face as he slept. Things had been hectic for him lately, having a comeback later in the month and the plethora of music and variety shows to follow.
Mingyu had been writing lyrics on the kitchen island one day, sputtering random words as you quipped in rhymes of your own without context, stirring the pot of soup on the hob at the same time.  
One particular rhyme you spew out catches him off guard and he barks out a laugh at the ridiculous combination.
“I should put you on song credits for this”
“What do you think my producer name could be?”
He thinks for a second, “Banana bread sounds stupid, um, how’s brownie?”
“Cute, and serious enough” you agree, “I’ll be expecting to see my name on that album, sir”
Snapping out of your thoughts, you turn your attention back to the sleeping man curled up in your lap. You wonder if you could fall asleep on the couch too, keep him here with you for the night. Be a little selfish. It’d be nice, making waffles for breakfast when morning comes. But he needed to be at the dorm in the morning, the boys knew where he was but managers that’d come pouring in at 7 AM sharp, did not. And it was best kept that way. The last thing Mingyu wanted, you knew, was people getting the wrong idea. The thought stung a little bit, but you knew not to mix your hopes with what reality was giving you.
So you gather the courage to slowly reign him back from dreamland.
***
Your sitting with Mingyu and Seungkwan on the couches outside the dressing rooms, a little bit before they have to go to perform. You were done with your agenda and was waiting for them to start filing out before beginning to pack up.
“No, because why does he get to eat all the good stuff right out the oven and we don’t, that’s not fair” Seungkwan complained loudy to you, a mildly offended look on his face.
“Stop being such a complain bot, you’re never happy if I have nice things” Mingyu retorts, increasingly nasty looks being exchanged for an argument about freshly baked goods.
“Oh, I’m the hater?! Let me jog your memory, who was the one sulking and shoving me around when Y/n wouldn’t let you-”
Mingyu had jumped up and pulled Seungkwan into a headlock, his poor Americano half flying across the hall as he yells out in disarray.
“YAH!” cued with more noises of struggle and muffled threats.
You chose to embrace the violence by sitting in your seat and laughing as Vernon recorded their antics from the doorway inside eventually circing them for his supposed cinematic effect, catered for the inevitable weverse post that was to come.
Cut to them apologizing and cleaning up the mess of coffee and disregard.
You decide to be nice and attempt to make peace by reassuring Seungkwan, “Come over after you’re done promoting this week, I’ll make up for all the bread and cookies you missed out on”
“If you've finished with your escort duties Y/n, could you please come in and do your day job?”
The voice came from the doorway of the dressing room, your senior makeup artist standing there with her usual mildly inconvenienced expression. It took you a minute to fully understand what she meant by that sentence, your body completely still.
“Offended? What, like I’m wrong?”
You were no stranger to insulting behaviour in work places, but they’d always been revolving around your actual job description. People who didn’t like you knew they had to be smart on how they treated you regardles.
This was different. This felt like you were projected back in time to your solemn middle school days to mean girls taunting you about your spongebob socks, except multiply that by about a thousand.
You feel your stomach begin to churn as that nauseous feeling of shame began to settle itself into your veins.
You’re not sure how long you’ve been sitting there but when she slightly raises her voice; “Are you getting up or not?” your hands actively begin to tremble the slightest amount.
You’re making moves to get up by puting your coffee cup down, not knowing what to do except follow commands.
Your interrupted by a voice from behind; “She’s coming in, give us a minute”
Mingyu’s standing there, his expression stoic as Seungkwan and Vernon looked as stunned as you felt. You don’t register it in the moment, but the people in the hall, venue staff and those for other artists have also silenced, watching the scene unfold.
Her lips are in a tight line, her expression remaining irritated as she steps back inside the room.
You realise you need to do something to diffuse the escalated situation. Letting out a breathy laugh, you get up and tell them that you’ll be going inside, trying to keep your expression pleasant and unaffected, not waiting before turning around to spare them the burden of a response. People get yelled at everyday, and this is no different. You aren’t gonna be the one to make a scene out of a regular occurrence.
You know what's coming when you get inside, she’s waiting as she pulls you aside.
“Your behavior has been quite concerning recently, let me remind you of your place here and what you were hired to do. You've been dilly dallying with people who aren't even your friends, and its quite funny that you’d think they are. It's time to wake up from wasting your time making heart eyes at men who are way out of your league. I won't tolerate any more nonsense from you, and trust I won’t be this nice or forgiving the next time this happens”
You choose to nod your head.
“That’s another thing, use your own words. Don’t think other people are gonna be there all the time to speak for you” She spits out, her professional front slowly eroding the more she spoke.
“Yes, ma’am” You say, hoarse voice.
“Louder, next time”, she stalks out as majority of the people in the room also begin to leave for the filming downstairs.
You’re left standing awkwardly in front of the racks of clothes, trying to digest what just happened to you. Looking around the room, you try to figure out what your supposed to do.
Clothes on the couches, eyeshadow brushes on the floor. There’s a torn sponge resting underneath one of the chairs, a couple styrofoam boxes left on the tables from lunch.
There’s so much for you to do, you arent sure how you thought you had time to sit down and chat. But you’re not sure where to begin either. The room is a mess of smells and colours even without the buzzing noise of people getting ready. Tears begin to form as you try to navigate what you’re supposed to do, realising you can’t possibly find a starting point for any of this mess. Before you have time to think of anything else, a hand is holding onto your wrist, small and soft.
It’s Yoona, another one of the makeup artists.
“Y/n, I think it’s best if you go home, it’s been tiring.”
“But-”
“Don’t worry, I’ll handle her. Just trust me. Go home you’ll feel alot better”
She notices you hesitate for a second, and goes in to give you a hug.
It felt nice, to be hugged by a friend. For some reason, it didn’t feel like she was pitying you, her expression and aura reassuring you that you didn’t have to stand here alone.
“Whatever happened today shouldn't have happened, but you don’t need to think about that right now. Go home and do nice things for yourself, we’ll figure it out later. You have my number, give me a text once you get home. We can go out later if you want, when I get off work, to get your mind off things”
You’re not sure how you’re holding back the waterpark that has become of your tearducts as you hear those words from an unsuspecting friend, you nod with a smile. You feel a little more calm.
You can’t tell if you care enough to consider the consequences of your senior finding out how you’re doubling or nothing on your already posed humiliation. But the only thing you can think of right now is your bed and the ceiling you’d stare burn holes into.
So you, for the first time in a while, chose to choose yourself by picking up your satchel and leaving the chaos behind you as you walk to your car.
***
Just because you were brave where it mattered most doesn’t mean you weren’t allowed to cry.
You had come home, shot Yoona a brief text, and promptly began to sob the absolute Nile into your sheets.
You had never cried like this before, loud wracked sobs coming from a place in your chest you had locked away during a time you couldn’t even remember. You’re breathing after every choked cry is a sputtered intake of life, only to spit it back out as you let out another sob of what sounds like agony. There’s nothing in your head, nothing but the words that were spoken to you as echoes of your own mind. Hypocritical of you to hate them when the same words circled in your head like a mantra every cursed, unfortunate day. She had done you a favour, by spitting out the truth you’d stewed, chewed and kept in your mouth ever since you got here. This was a you problem, to believe that you were capable of things beyond your bracket. You were told by the universe, screamed at by the world, that this was never meant for you, and you chose to ignore it. You chose to be stubborn. You brought this misery upon yourself.
Once you’ve disposed your body weight of tears and snot and burden, you’re left to stare at your innocent sheets now stained with mascara and your sorrows. You crawl into your covers and rest your muscles for a few seconds, head empty. You aren’t sure when you drift off, but you're glad that you do.
You don’t dream for once.
***
You wake up feeling like you drank a gallon of water and went to sleep. Your eyes, nose and throat feel like they’ve been over watered yet dry at the same time. You don’t realise what’s really arising pangs of irritancy in your brain once you figure out the consistent sound is a door bell. You’re doorbell, of the house that you live in.
You’re slow to push yourself up, realising your slept in your day clothes. It’s dark out but you're not sure what time it is, and quite frankly, you can’t say you care enough to check. You need to silence your doorbell first, which can only be done by silencing whatever hell sent individual was playing drums on the button outside.
It’s a record screech in your brain as you peer through your peephole and realise who the aforementioned hell sent individual was.
Mingyu was outside your door.
You don’t realise you look like you crawled out of a sewer till it’s too late and you’ve already opened the door through muscle memory. Mingyu was always welcome in your space.
He was in casual clothes, his hair pushed back from the guessed hands that ran through it, but he was still in stage his stage makeup.  
“Oh, were you sleeping?” He asks, eyes a little wide, expression cautious.
“Yeah.”
“I’ll go then, you weren’t answering your phone for anyone and you told Yoona you were home but you weren’t opening the door, i was worried. Sorry I ringed it so much I probably should’ve assumed-”
He stops to look at you, and it’s like realizes something before he finally says; “Just wanted to make sure you were okay, I’ll see you around. I’ll leave you alone”
“Wait,” you croak out, licking your lips, conscious of your morning voice, “Can you stay? Please? If you can.”
He stops to look at you, expression changing from sheepish to defensive.
“No! I mean, yes. Yes. I’ll stay. I’ll stay for as long as you want”
You let him in as he slips off his shoes and you lead him to the living room. His presence in the familiar place seems like it last happened eras ago, when he was only here maybe a week prior.  
“You know where everything is, I’ll be back gimme like 5 minutes”
You’re scared to look at yourself in your bathroom mirror, so you don’t, and choose to scrub your face looking down at your sink. You change into a sweatshirt and trouser loungewear set, deciding to save your dignity a little bit further as you brush your hair and clip it back with a claw clip.
You take a breath before entering the living room again.
He’s sitting on the floor in your usual place, two steaming mugs on the coffee table, the tabs hanging out of the cup. He made you tea.
You sit down next to him, not really prepared for what you should be saying.
“How long has she been speaking to you like that?” He asks you quietly.
“She was always kinda itchy and uptight and stuff but, it was never like this” You say.
“Regardless, whatever that was, it was, wrong, uncalled for, all of those things” He says, sputtering a little bit.
He stops and sighs. It’s silect for a minute before he turns in his seat to face you, grabbing your folded legs and pulling you to face him too.
“Yoona heard everything she said to you after you went in, she heard it all. And she knows about some other stuff too. If you think, even for a second, that I’m not your friend, I might actually think there’s something wrong with you.
“If everything we’ve been through this past, almost a year, doesn’t amount to us at least being friends then I don’t know what it means to have one at all. You’re the first person in a while I’ve been able to be this open with. You know me better than most people, you’ve seen me at my worst and at my best. I’ve let you read me all you want, because I know I can be an open book if it’s you. I trust you more than I can trust myself sometimes, and I really wish you would trust me too.”
You’re watching him as he says all of this, you look up to make eye contact a couple times, and he’s looking at you everytime you lift your head.
“I do trust you. Probably more than anyone else. It’s myself I don’t trust. It’s hard for me to open up, I’m scared I’m gonna say something that’ll scare you away. And, I just thought maybe she was right today, that I need to realise that it can’t be that way between us, I have a job to do”
“What can’t be between us?”
“I like you, Mingyu. Like, I’m basically in love with you and have been since I fucking met you. I couldn’t believe that you could possibly be friends with someone like me, a confused, all over the place airhead who can’t tell right from left sometimes, forget you ever liking me. All that happened is that we became friends and I thought that this was as far as fate was gonna push us. All today told me was that … that was an overextension too. It was a wake up call that I can’t have everything in life. Things were going too well for us and I was letting myself think it could stay that way forever. I’m sorry for being this way, I’m sorry for making you feel uncomfortable and out of place. This is the last thing you’d want to hear from a friend and I’m sorry I’m putting you in this situation right now and that you had to go through that today-”
You don’t finish what your saying because you're interrupted. Interrupted by arms pulling you forward and into Mingyu in front of you.
Your both sitting in your living room at 3 AM, on the floor in front of your sofa like you both have so many times. Except now, Mingyu is holding you in his arms, and kissing you so delicately it hurts.
It’s warm, like getting into bed after a long day, the scent of home and security engulfing you as you begin to forget about the qualms of life.
He’s moving his lips slowly, with care and a feeling so overflowing you can’t describe.
He lets go slowly and rests his forehead against yours, his arms are around you tight, legs wrapped around your entire body so you can't escape - physically or mentally.
“You dumbass” You hear him say.
“I love you,Y/n. More than anything. And I need you to know that you don’t have to hide. If you think your thoughts are a burden then I want to carry it for you. I want you to realise you’re not alone. I want you to stop pushing me away. Everytime I want to do something nice for you, you try to push the effort to something else, everytime I try to take care of you, you have this look that makes me think you feel guilty for taking up my time or something. Everytime I think you’re about to ask me to stay the night, you remind me I have priorities and I should go, even though I know you want me to stay with you. I want you to stop caring so much for how other people feel and realise you can demand the same from the universe too. You deserve love and to be treated with care. You need to let people do that for you, love.”
Your looking at him now, your turn to have stars in your eyes.
He loves you.
And you feel it. You feel it in his words, in his eyes, in the kisses he’s leaving on your face, in his arms that are wrapped around you, ready to shield you from the world.
You don’t say anything as you fall into his chest, head on shoulder, relaxed body in the cage he’s made for you. You close your eyes as the tears are burning down your face. Except, this time they’re because your relieved.
You both got up from the uncomfortable floor and moved to your bed, still tangled within each other as you clarified everything else.
You found out that majority of the people who heard it were very upset at the situation, but didn’t know how to approach or confront her.
Seungkwan almost bust a blood vessel after he had digested what had happened, disbelief and threats on his tongue as he refused to get touched up by her during filming, apparently making a point to walk to somebody else. Seungcheol was thinking of trying to bring up the problem to management, considering how Mingyu too was distracted all the way home.
“The rest of them have gotten quite protective of you too, I think. It’s not like I shut up about you”
Apparently the only reason you were asked to start taking charge on makeup was because some of the other senior artists pressured your mentor to stop restricting you. It made you feel a little more secure that it wasn’t just you that felt pushed down.
She didn’t like that you were doing so well, considering it meant she was wrong about you and your abilities. It hurt her ego a little bit that people stopped preferring her to do their makeup or their touchups, how they wouldn’t interact with her the same way.
“Alot coming from a middle aged, married woman, attention seeking like a child” Mingyu added, scoffing with a sour face as he nuzzled into the crown of your head.
“The boys really like you by the way, they’ve been rooting for us since forever” He says, and your heart swells unimaginably so; you felt loved, so so loved.
You scooch up to plant a kiss on the underside of his chin and then one on his lips.
“That makes me happy”
“I’m happy that you’re happy. You deserve to be happy, everyday” He smooches you on the face again. “Oh, and don’t worry about that stinky face I’ll take care of her”
You laugh at the determination in his voice, but you wanted to clarify something.
“Please, let me handle her myself. I’ll ask for help if she’s stubborn but I wanna try by myself first”
“That was hot”
You push his chest away as you bark out a laugh at the random comment, hiding you face, by turning the other way.
He battles that by pull you back into his chest and continuing his atics
“What I can’t call my girlfriend hot. You’re hot. Your the sexiest motherfucker I’ve ever seen” smooch “You’re beautiful” and again  “amazing” and again “gorgeous spectacular-”
You don’t fall asleep until the sun has well made its way up the sky, taking the executive decision to sleep in till way past lunch and maybe even take a nap afterwards.
You don’t care how it goes, because your happy just being with him.
***
You met with Yoona a couple days later at a cafe.
“Seungcheol asked us if we were facing the same kind of behaviour from her too. And everyone told him she was stuck up and rude and stuff. He said he wanted to bring it up to management but it didn’t really concern him directly so they wouldn’t listen. He told us to do so ourselves and we thought about it, but we’re gonna need to tell them about that too”
You nod your head as you listen to her speak, it was making sense.
“I dont mind going up to management at all and talking about it. I get that the rest of the stuff is a little too tame to be considered, which sucks because she shouldn’t be talking to us like that at all”
“Mhm, and I was thinking we could vouch for you on how she was restraining you for almost a year. Basically not letting you do your job. That’d be a another thing for them to think about”
“Yeah. Let’s do it asap, how’s this Monday?”
“Perfect, I’ll add everyone to a group chat and let them know”
And go up to management you did, who were surprisingly understanding. Apparently having received multiple reports and even videos of the most recent incident to act as proof. It was working out for all of you, and it proved to stay that way as they responded with a promise to shift her to a different department.
You had gone home that day feeling fulfilled and relieved. Mingyu, a man with spectacular timing had also proceeded to send you a text as a distraction,
[Mingyu]: Kwan wants to come over
[Mingyu]: something about croissants
[Mingyu]: Should he text you ab it?
[You]: yeah ofc
[You]: I’ll order the butter
[You]: you tell him to text me lol
Two nights ago felt like it happened last year with all the unimaginable advances deciding to happen within the past 48 hours. Right now you were more excited for the company you were about to recieve, more concerned with making sure you made the best batch of croissants Seungkwan ever did see.
***
You were in the car with Mingyu outside the company building, waiting until the clock struck 9 to go inside.
Today was the last day you’d think about this, being called up for a face to face meeting with the staff member, so she could formally apologise. The team had planned a dinner tonight, to celebrate the end of her ‘wicked reign’ as Yoona described it.
You were finding friends everywhere, ones that were always there, pulling through for each other as you yourself navigated a new direction of thinking for yourself. You were learning to walk past your anxiety ridden desire to draw lines with everyone, as you took the first step with the dinner tonight. It would be fun for you, and a bond you’d begin to build.
You learned that you weren’t delusional anymore, and that Mingyu did love you the same. It had only been a week or so, but one of the happiest weeks of your life, despite everything. He was teaching you more lessons than he thought he was.
Mingyu squeezes your hand from the driver’s side as it was past 9, “Let’s go?”
“Lets go”
***
Mingyu’s way too enthusiastic as soon as he wakes up, indulging you in a morning (afternoon) makeout session, claiming he doesn’t care for you morning breath.
“Well I do!” you exclaim, pushing him off with a giggle “About your morning breath, stinky”
He clutches his chest in dramatic offense, “How could you? I thought you loved me”
You respond my projecting a cushion to his face.
“Do you want pancakes or eggs for breakfast?” You ask, legs hanging over the bed.
Mingyu looks up, a wicked glint in his eye, and you immediately know he’s going to say something of no help.
“I want you for breakfast” He says, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you back in bed.
“MINGYU!”
Needless to say, all was well.
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kinascum · 6 months ago
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BITS. - M.STURNIOLO (harry potter AU)
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summary: As night descended upon the Hogwarts grounds, the students retreated to their dormitories. However, as a prefect, you noticed a student missing from the dungeons.
Warnings: listen english is not my first language im sorry, angst, sad matt, regulus black coded matt, prefect!reader, slytherin!matt.
A/N: Hey! this is pt1 of my 1K CELEBRATION! find the celebration masterlist here (coming soon)! enjoy!!
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As darkness fell, enveloping the Hogwarts castle, all of the students retired to their dormitories, preparing for a restful night's sleep. However, as a diligent prefect of Slytherin House, you couldn't help but notice that Matt Sturniolo was conspicuously absent from the Slytherin Common Room. Despite the stringent rules prohibiting students from wandering the halls at night, your concern for Matt propelled you to search for him.
Quietly making your way through the dimly lit corridors, you cautiously avoid the watchful gaze of the janitor and the ever-wandering eyes of the teachers. After what seems like an eternity, you catch sight of a mysterious figure in the main courtyard. And there he is, standing alone amidst the cold night, his face powdered with a delicate layer of snow. His demeanor exudes an aura of hostility and distance, not at all striking as this was his usual self. As you cautiously approach him, attempting to engage in conversation, Matt remains silent, his thoughts veiled in the mystique of the silent winter night.
You try several times to bring him out of his melancholic trance, but it seems like no matter how hard you try, Matt won't speak. Frustrated by his seemingly stubborn silence, you approach him and grab his shoulder, turning him back. You gasp, not having expected the tears running through his eyes.
"Matt...?" you question, concern bubbling in your own eyes as Matt' sobs intensify.
"Get away from me!" he yells tearfully, his voice quivering with fear and vulnerability. You instinctively reach out to place a comforting hand on his shoulder, but he recoils, his eyes filled with hostility as if they were shooting needles into your skin.
Matt had never been the type to open up, yet you can't bear to see him suffer alone. Not when you know that his loneliness is eating away at him, causing him to doubt himself and question his sanity. How could someone as thoughtful and kindhearted (even if he didn't show it much) as Matt go through such anguish? It doesn't make sense.
In one swift motion, you pull the boy into a tight embrace, offering him the only comfort that you can give him in this time of need. He fights against your warmth. Sighs of denial fly out onto your shoulder as he cries. He rejects the embrace as he is used to doing, but you know he needs this more than his pride.
Eventually, he starts desperately clutching your clothes, struggling to stifle his cries, burying his head in your chest. You gently caress his back, trying to offer some semblance of comfort, yet his shaking is unbearable. All too soon, he pushes you away, looking into your eyes with tears rolling down his cheeks.
"Why are you doing this!?" His uncontrollable sobs cause him to struggle for breath, and as he exhales, large white clouds of condensation form over his face.
Your heart breaks at the anguish radiating from him, as well as the frustration seeping out of every pore of his body. It feels like an entire ocean lies between you two, and the mere sight of it makes you feel so helpless. And then it hits you.
The first thought that comes to mind as you stare into Matt's wide blue eyes: You have to be there for him. If not for yourself, then for the sake of everyone who loves and cares about him. You want to ease the pain that his despair brings him, whether he wants it or not. Matt Sturniolo deserves to be happy, even if he's unable to accept it at the moment.
"I'm doing this because I care," you say between gasps for air, your heart pounding as you desperately search for the right words to convey your understanding.
Even though you barely know this boy, you can sense the weight he carries and how he longs for moments of peace and support. You take tentative steps toward him. You stop in front of him, your heart still pounding, feeling like you had ripped it out just to hand it to him.
As you stand there in the courtyard facing Matt, the cold night air seems to envelope you, creating an almost tangible barrier between your emotions. But the urgency to reach out to him and provide some comfort is overwhelming. He looks at you with a mix of surprise and pain in his eyes, as if he can't fathom why anyone would care about his turmoil.
"I want to be there for you," you repeat, your voice barely above a whisper, your own emotions threatening to spill over. "You don't have to go through this alone." Matt gazes at you, his expression a tumultuous blend of vulnerability and defiance.
It's evident that he's battling his inner turmoil, struggling with the idea of letting someone in. For a moment, neither of you speak. The silence seems to echo the heaviness of the situation, mirroring the weight of Matt's pain. At that moment, you feel a profound determination to break through the walls he had built around himself, to let him know that he isn't alone in this.
"I don't know if I can," Matt finally murmurs, his voice laden with uncertainty. He takes a hesitant breath, his gaze flickering between you and the ground. You wait, giving him the space and time he needs to process his emotions.
Before you can say anything, you hear footsteps approaching. Professor McGonagall's dark eyes pierce through the darkness. "What is the meaning of this?" she demands, her voice commanding and tinged with disapproval.
Matt steps back, his moment of vulnerability vanishing as quickly as it had come. "Nothing, Professor. I was just... I was just leaving," he stammers, avoiding your gaze as he brushes past you and heads back toward the Slytherin Common Room.
But before he could, McGonagall stops him dead in his tracks, "No, you werent, actually." She said, the boy stood confused before she continued speaking. "It is far past curfew, children, follow me."
Both you and Matt followed her out of the school, grumbling under your breaths. McGonagall turned and cast a stern look at you both, her eyes daring them to talk back. You quickly obeyed, knowing that McGonagall would not tolerate any disobedience.
Upon arrival at Hagrid's hut, he's already waiting outside, Fang by his side "Well, kids, you'll help me here tonight then," Hagrid said, his heavy accent dripping on his voice as he handed Regulus a heavy light, and an axe to you.
"What is this?" you ask, confused as to why he would hand a heavy axe to a child. "Oh. Right..." he turns around to face you both, "We are cutting down some trees these nasty little creatures have been eating at." The rest of his sentence was drowned out by your thoughts as you walked with him.
The weight of his pain lingers in the cold night air, and you can't help but wonder if you'll ever be able to break through to him. With a heavy heart, you make your way into the forbidden forest, knowing that despite your best intentions, some battles are fought alone.
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A/N²: not my best work, but let me know if yall want a pt2, kisses!
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haddonfieldwhore · 10 months ago
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safe and sound - matthew tkachuk
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matthew tkachuk x gn!reader
summary: matthew gets hurt during a game; you get worried it’s bad like last time
warnings: mention of injury, sprinkle of angst
word count: 0.9k
you watched with bated breath as matthew skated cautiously towards the bench, doubling over in discomfort as he sat down, and you pinched your arm gently between your fingertips. ‘it’s just a bad dream- like it always is’ you thought to yourself; ever since he had fractured his sternum during the playoffs last season, your body tensed anytime he was hit into the boards. more times than you could count, you had woken with a start from a nightmare of matthew getting injured again, only to reach over and find him asleep next to you. the thought of him getting hurt like that again plagued your mind, and you wanted more than anything for this to be a dream.
but as the game continued on in front of you, matthew still sat on the bench, you came to the conclusion that you were awake; that this was real. it hadn’t looked like a dirty hit, just an unfortunate one as number 19 found himself crushed between two of the carolina players; no love lost between these two teams. you were not at the game tonight, and as the players departed to the locker room for the first intermission you watched your phone impatiently for a text from matthew.
it finally came through, after what felt like perhaps the longest five minutes of your life, and you breathed a sigh of relief as you read the message on the screen.
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he said he would be home soon and you tried to focus on the rest of the game, which remained scoreless until nearly the bitter end. florida scored but the goal was called offside and taken away, and in the end carolina scored with only 18 seconds left, leading to them winning the game.
not long after matthew returned home looking defeated and tired, his hair messy and his white shirt unbuttoned at the top underneath his grey suit he had worn to the game. his tie had been forgotten as it was absent from around his neck, and you walked over to the door to greet him, pulling him into a cautious hug.
“hey,” he hummed under his breath as he placed his bag on the ground and his arms circled around your body. your head rested on his chest as you breathed in his familiar scent, easing your anxiety slightly.
“hey matty,” you sighed, kissing his exposed collarbone softly.
“i’m not gonna break, you know,” he laughed softly, noticing your hesitation, but his body betrayed him as he winced slightly from the laughter shaking his chest. he hoped you hadn’t noticed.
you did.
“but you can, and that’s what scares me,” you protested, still holding on to him carefully. “what happened? are you okay?” you asked, your fingertips gently touching his torso.
“yeah, it’s probably just a bruised rib. they’ll evaluate again tomorrow but for now it should just be a day to day thing,”
“don’t push yourself. if you’re hurt like you were last season…“
“i’m not,“
“are you sure? don’t think i’ve forgotten that brady had to physically drag you out of bed and help you get dressed. and then you played a game after.“
“i know. im sorry baby,” he kissed the top of your head.
“i just worry about you,” you sighed, pulling away to look up at him, your hand reaching up to brush his curls away from his forehead. his hair was getting long, and he had let his facial hair grow out a bit as well; he looked beautiful, though his eyes remained sad as they looked down at you.
“i hadn’t noticed,” he teased, a smile spreading across his face as finally a sparkle of amusement reached his eyes. “i love you,” he smiled again, and the corner of your mouth pulled upwards.
“i love you more,” you argued. “i love you in one piece though, so please try to stay that way-“ he interrupted you with a kiss, and you could feel his smile against your lips.
“i’ll try,” he promised, and he meant it whether you believed him or not.
“thank you,” you kissed him softly again. “but just for the record, i will always be here to put you back together.” you gently slid his suit jacket off his shoulders, placing it over the back of the couch as you walked towards it to sit down. matthew pulled you into his side and you snuggled close to him.
“did the seattle game start yet?” he asked, and you laughed; he truly did live and breathe hockey.
“i think so, probably a few minutes ago,” you said, grabbing the remote and switching on the tv. “i still can’t believe you want to watch hockey after playing a game. you guys don’t even play them again this season.”
“yeah but vancouver is only two points ahead of us, so i want them to lose,” he explained. it made sense; florida was fighting back and forth with boston for first in the eastern conference right now, and both teams were right on the tail of the canucks who were first overall in the league.
“are you sure you don’t want to just rest?”
“i’m watching a game, not playing it,” he laughed, and his lips pressed against the side of your head as he held you close to him. “and besides,” he said with a smile as he looked at you. you who always made sure he was okay. you who probably would’ve dropped the gloves (metaphorically speaking) with svechnikov yourself for hitting him if given the opportunity. you who he loved more than anyone else in the world.
“i feel better already.”
disclaimer: all screenshots, events, and/or interactions depicted in this are a work of fiction. i have no association with any parties mentioned
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kaq3yma · 4 months ago
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𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓 𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 [togame jo]
⸻ a brief mention of bully + shaming, very slightly angst, slight violence if you squint, hurt to comfort.
qeena's brief note: a very short drabble from me to make it up for (?) idk what (੭˃ᴗ˂)੭ if you guys somehow notice it from how i wrote this, im still having a bit hard times characterising togame (all winbre chacs actually (。•́︿•̀。) ) im having a hard time rn so very sorry if this is shit but im learning so bare with me TT TT thank u so much sayangsss and happy reading xoxo
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As the day draws to a close, the sun gradually sink beneath the horizon creating hues of gold and crimson. You settle on the swing, your feet bring you back and forth as the metal creaks and dip at the slight force. You had a pack of ice on your cheek, a futile attempt to soothe the swollen bump before he came. Without notice, the swing beside you creaks causes you to tilt your head. The prominent yellow colored jacket makes your eyes lit and brighten up.
Togame has two bottles of ramune in his hands. He pops both marbles inside the bottle with frizz spewing out and give you one "What's with all that ice? He chuckles, taking a quick sip of his drink. You shake your head, his chuckle mixing in with your faint laughter "My teacher slapped me because I hurt my classmate." His brows quirk in a surprised manner "...Yeah," You look down, fiddling with the marble inside your carbonated drink.
You look up to stare at him because he said nothing but his face, you can tell by his expression, he's pleading you to begin again. A wry laugh escaped past your lips "He was talking shit about me, calling me ugly. I was so pissed off... I think I broke his nose." That earns you a laugh from Togame. You look at him, offended that he find times to laugh when you're being serious and swollen. His laughter trails off and he stare at you "You should've gauge his eyes out, that can make sure he's really blind." You scoff, laughing at his reckless and playful demeanor "I'm serious, you dork. Why are you being so violent?" You huff, drinking half of your ramune in frustration.
Suddenly, he gets up and push his hands inside his trouser jeans "Let's go." He walks off and you look at him, baffled "Where are you going, idiot? I was just getting comfortable." Sighing, you pick your stuff and run after him.
The two of you walk alongside each other, finding spots to take a breather "You..." His raspy voice caught you in trance and you look up, one brow furrowed upwards "Huh?" He shake his head, picking his glass up from the bridge of his nose to adjusted it "You are actually really pretty, Y/n." You grin, nodding your head at him as a confirmation to his tender words. Togame hold, no, grasp your hand firmly and put them in the pocket of his jacket.
You look at him from the side, and because of his round glass, you couldn't make out his green irises. The Shishitoren second-in-command look down at you, tightening his hold on you. However, when he look down, your reflection flashes into your eyes, ables you to look at your face, your pretty face.
The next day, you woke up and get ready for school. You look at yourself in the mirror, feeling all giddy and confident about today. You pack your stuff inside your bag and hurry out to school. You didn't check your phone when it buzzes but it's a text, from Togame and it says; "Have a nice day at school."
When you arrives, you notice a particular seat is empty. It was that guy's. You look at one of your classmates, asking them for his whereabouts since it's unusual for him to be absent but they mindless shrug you off, saying they had no idea. Unbeknownst to you though...
"What can I do? It's your fault for picking up on my girlfriend, anyway~" A swift blow erupt from the narrow alleyway and this time, Togame knows, the guy's nose is broke, for real.
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𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓 is open. all rights reserved goes to @kaq3yma on tumblr.
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brownsugaboba · 6 days ago
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title: “Chapter 3: Finally at Peace.”
december 22nd, 2024
—————————————————————————————
bruce wayne x reader.
black reader. (anyone can read but emphasis on black.)
19+. (this chapter is NOT 19+, however upcoming chapters will be.)
this chapter is a bit longer, thanks to the amount of dialogue. but i hope you enjoy it regardless.
thank you.
—————————————————————————————
the sound of the church doors creaking open was nearly drowned out by the low hum of conversation and the soft strains of classical music. the aisle stretched out before them, decorated with lush white flowers and draped silk, casting a soft glow in the dimly lit space. it was truly beautiful, almost unreal.
bruce wayne stepped inside beside you, the familiar warmth of her presence beside him doing little to calm the storm of thoughts swirling in his head.
the contrast between the quietness of the church and the chaos in his mind was jarring. his eyes, almost involuntarily, found themselves trailing over you to calm himself down.
you was stunning.
your dress—deep emerald green, satin, with delicate lacework along the neckline—clung to you frame in a way that made his breath catch in his throat.
the dark emerald dress accentuated you graceful posture, your shoulders relaxed but dignified. the way your dark, glistening skin caught the light reminded him of the stars, somehow both grounded and ethereal at the same time. your dark locs, styled in a low bun at the back of your neck, framed your face beautifully, and allowed for him to catch every single structure and detail.
you felt his gaze on you, but instead of discomfort, you felt a strange boost of confidence. you hadn’t worn this dress for anyone but yourself, which was your life as of lately, but you couldn’t deny the way bruce’s eyes lingered on you made you feel… noticed.
especially considering he knew every last thing about your childhood. he truly knew you.
the warmth of his attention made you smile ever so slightly, and you straightened her back a little, your steps becoming a bit more assured as you walked.
bruce, for his part, found it impossible to tear his gaze away. the moment they entered the church, he’d been thrown off balance. he tried to focus on anything else—anything to shake the sudden rush of heat that had surged through him.
the decorations were beautiful, he noted absently.
“look at the reception area,” bruce began, trying his best to sound composed, his voice still a little hoarse. “it’s… well, it’s beautiful. though im not sure it’s something selina would have picked herself.”
you glanced around, seeing the gorgeous arrangements of white and gold. "maybe she was feeling different this time," she teased lightly, giving him a reassuring smile. "after all, weddings can bring out the most unexpected sides of people."
he nodded absentmindedly, but his thoughts were far from the decorations. his mind lingered on you still: the way you moved, the way the light played across your skin, the way you made him feel like he was seeing you for the first time all over again.
the little girl that he had grown up beside, now back in his life.
they found their seats, and as they sat, bruce’s eyes couldn’t help but wander to the front of the church, where selina’s parents were seated.
their eyes locked for a brief moment, and selina’s mother and father both smiled warmly at him, clearly surprised to see him there. bruce could read the softness in their expressions—the warmth that spoke of understanding, of history. though they had only known bruce for a short period of time, their hearts still ached for him.
“who are they?” you ask bruce, turning your body to him slightly.
bruce leaned slightly toward you, his voice lowering. "her parents. i suppose they still are cordial with me, considering everything."
you nodded, your expression softening in understanding. “of course they are, you are you after all.”
bruce’s gaze softened as he looked at her, gratitude flickering across his face, however he couldn’t help but let his insecurities take over. "you’re just being nice."
you smiled wistfully and gently pats his knee. "just because you don’t feel the same way as me, doesn’t mean i’m incorrect."
“i never specifically said that you were.” he teased back with a small smile, the smallest smile considering the setting and staring he could feel on him.
you couldn’t help but smirk softly at his response, enjoying the new profound teasing in him.
the music shifted, signaling that the bride would soon enter. bruce stood and offered his arm to you, who smiled and took it gracefully. as selina made her entrance, her delicate white dress sparkling under the chandeliers, there was a collective hush. she looked truly radiant—you both thought.
for bruce, it felt as though time slowed, watching selina walk down. to a man that wasn’t him. to a man that he didn’t quite like. and to a man that he could never be.
he had no time left to question selina’s decision, he could only respect it; and that he did. no matter how upset or frustrated it made him, he could only respect her. even watching her in that moment, he respected her choice.
his eyes glanced over at you as selina walked closer to the alter where her soon to be husband stood. his eyes took in your side profile, along with the side of your body as you faced the main event. his dark eyes however, couldn’t help but to continue to gaze at you.
your presence and appearance had him in a slight trance. he wasn’t sure if he was using you as a distraction to what was occurring, or if truly felt.. deeper.
regardless, he couldn’t put his finger on how he felt, considering it was something completely new. however, he knew that you standing beside him, was more real to him in that moment than anything else in the room. the weight of the past, the years of silence between them, seemed to hover in between the two.
after selina and her husband exchanged ’i do’s’ and a rather quick kiss, the guests began to filter forward to congratulate her, offering their well-wishes, and admiring her true beauty.
bruce and you stayed in your seats for a moment, allowing the bustle around you to pass. you both knew the weight of what was happening—the history between bruce and selina, the years of unspoken words—and so they allowed themselves the rare opportunity to speak about just that without interruption.
though, interruption soon found them right before they could.
selina’s father tapped your shoulder lightly to get your attention. bruce looks past your face with a smile and quickly stands. you turn to face whoever is behind you, standing in the process.
“well don’t you and your date look stunning.” selina’s father spoke with a smile over at you.
bruce grins as well, holding his hand out for the man to shake, however the man instead pulled him into a tight hug.
you smile a bit wider at the exchange before looking over at selina’s mother, who was already gazing upon you. her eyes were soft, which you didn’t expect.
you carefully step closer to her and hold you hand out as well. “it’s wonderful to meet you ms. kyle.”
she bring her hand up and instead of shaking it, she holds it in her palm gently, letting her other hand cover the surface.
“it’s wonderful to see him with someone as beautiful as you.”
you smile more, completely surprised by her compliment. bruce as well, since he and selina’s father were watching the whole thing go down.
“you don’t know how much hearing you say that means to me ms. kyle.”
she smiles still with kind eyes and look over at bruce. she goes to grab his hand, bringing it over to place on top of your own; holding them both gently.
whatever happened next was a blur for bruce, all he could focus on was the feeling of your warm skin underneath his own. something new, yet something old.
though his eyes were supposed to be on ms. kyle as she spoke, he couldn’t help but stare down at the sight of your hands touching; one on top of the another.
“i’m so glad you both came. i wasn’t aware that selina even invited you bruce.”
“i sure expected it. you know how selina can be.” mr. kyle spoke.
he finally looks back over at her, at the sound of his name. along with glancing at selina’s father.
“i do.” bruce looks up with a small nod and makeshift smile.
her father couldn’t help but laugh soft at bruce’s response. her mother finally lets go of your hands, and uses her own to playfully hit her husbands arm.
“it’s her wedding darling.” she says with a firm face, looking at him. “keep the jokes until after.” she mumbles with a small chuckle, looking back over at you and bruce.
bruce knew that they meant no harm, that was simply just how they were with one another, and as a family. he was happy to know that nothing changed after him and selina parted ways.
though, the choice was selina’s, a part of him assumed that her family would hate him for the separation regardless.
you smile to yourself as you watch the kyle’s laugh and tease one another about their newly wedded daughter, once you feel the warmth touch of another hand in yours.
you had forgotten so quickly about bruce’s hand on top of yours once ms. kyle was holding it. now.. he was holding yours. you couldn’t help but think it was an involuntary gesture.. maybe out of habit.
you look down at your hands as they hold each others every so softy, you slowly interlock your fingers before looking up at him again. who’s already looking at you.
you quickly come up with a response and whispered to him. “couples usually interlock their fingers when they hold hands.”
bruce chuckle softly at your response, a larger smile than before creeping up on his face as he nods his head.
“so i’ve seen.”
before you two could continue looking gazing into each others eyes, the crowd shifted. selina and her new husband, now smiling in the glow of their union, made their way through the throng of people, stopping occasionally for well-wishers. they finally approach you two, there was a palpable shift in the air, a tension that made even the festive atmosphere seem tight and strained.
selina, in her elegant gown, didn’t acknowledge you at first. her eyes were first fixed solely on the two of your hands holding onto one another’s. she then scanned bruce’s attire, her eyes finally stopping at his own, sharp and cold; as if she could sense something unspoken between you and him.
"mr. wayne," her husband finally spoke, making the tension between the two couples worse.
“mr. warren.” he responded, his eyes leaving selina’s and instead going over to her husband’s. since bruce didn’t know him as well, he couldn’t help but eye his appearance up close now; truly taking in what he looked like.
he was rather fair skinned and held almost the same build as bruce. his eyes were a slightly lighter brown, along with his hair. everything about him reminded bruce of himself, not in a way that we like to be reminded.
“and who do we have here?” her husband asked with a small smirk, his eyes going over to look at you.
bruce tried his hardest not to make a scene right then and there, his body tensing up as a reaction. just the way his eyes took you in, and observed you like no other. and on his wedding day out of all days, with his wife beside him.. it was rude.
not only to him but to you as well, and most importantly selina.
as you felt bruces hand tense while holding yours, you gently squeezed it; hoping to send him a sense of comfort.
he felt your squeeze, and focused solely on that, allowing his body to slowly relax once again.
selina watched all of this go down, her eyes finally look over into your own waiting for your response.
“his fiancé?” she asked, which only made her husbands head turn to her. his reaction coming off as confused. she ignored him completely and waiting for an answer from you, considering bruce was still in his own mind.
“girlfriend.” you respond with no hesitation. you bring your arm up and wrap it around bruce’s; hoping to send him small signals that you were there by his side still.
selina lets off a small scoff, playing the reaction off as if she was clearing her throat. she looks over at her husband, who was at still looking at her confused with her questions. “can you get me some water darling?”
her husband continues to gaze at her, they speak through their eyes before he decides to walk away.
selina then turns her attention back to you. “you must’ve just started dating if he hasn’t proposed to you yet.. i mean, it’s been a year.”
“says the one whose already married.” bruce responds stern and cold, his eyes back on hers.
selina couldn’t help but smirk at the reaction she caused. “look who’s finally back to his senses.”
you stay relaxed and calm as she speaks, not wanting to respond with something as rude similar to her. you didn’t want to stoop to her level, you wanted her to feel like she missed out on something. which you could tell she did, considering her reactions.
“i’m taking my time.” bruce starts, and gently squeezes your hand as he speaks once more. “(y/n) deserves someone who takes their time, and listens.”
“then why is she with you?”
“selina.” bruce’s voice was lower now, a bit more firm than before. you could tell that he was holding back a lot of emotions, a lot of anger that you could assume he wasn’t able to get out prior to their breakup.
“bruce.” you spoke softly and he immediately turns to face you, as if on cue. he knew he was letting her words get to him.
after a few seconds he nods at you just slightly and glances at the crowd. you respond back with a nod as well, understanding the gesture, and slowly beginning to pull your hand away.
though he was the one to ask you to leave, his hand moved just a bit to bring your hand back, wanting to hold on to it just a minute longer.
you were surprised once he reached out for your hand again. you leaned up and gently placed a small kiss on his cheek, something you were sure he wasn’t expecting; because of how warm his skin got after.
after the kiss you gently whisper to him. “i’m not going anywhere.”
bruce closed his eyes for a second after the kiss from you. he steadied his breath as quick as he could, after hearing you whisper to him; only for him to hear. words of comfort, something he hadn’t heard in a long time.
selina watched the whole scene go down. she quickly grew tired of seeing you too together. for a reason she was yet too far to fully admit. her eyes could help but scan you as you whispered and after, once you pulled away and connected your eyes with bruce’s again.
‘why was she being so soft with him? babying him?’ she thought to herself, and quickly turned her eyes somewhere else as a distraction.
her eyes land on her husband, though she wasn’t looking for him. she quickly realized that he completely forgot about her drink and instead was catching up with old friends.
“i think the conversation here is done.” you spoke sternly, fixing bruce’s bow tie. selina turns back to you. her eyes smiling just slightly as she forces out a chuckle,
“not even close.” she pauses. “i’m guessing you’ve never seen him this way? you’re in for a treat.”
as she spoke bruce kept his eyes on you as you fixed his collar. once you finished he turned his attention to selina once again. he moved his hand from your own and placed it on your back.
“why invite me to your wedding to argue about things we’ve already discussed?” bruce finally lets out.
“you should be happily married. not confused on our past.” he continues.
“something that ended a year ago, correct?” you add in and ask her, referring back to her making a small joke out of bruce not being in the same position as her; getting married a year later.
selina let out a small chuckle and shook her head once again. though she couldn’t come to terms as to why you were jumping in their discussion, she still responded.
“believe me, i’m not confused one bit. i’m more heart broken that you resulted in bringing your elementary school friend to my wedding.” she takes a step closer to him, knowing all about his past thanks to no one but him. “you truly couldn’t find anyone else in your life?”
the last comment stung bruce. he could feel the pain in his heart, almost as if selina was stabbing right through him with a sharp knife. she had no reason to come at him the way she was. she decided to leave him, not the other way around. and even though he did make a few mistakes, she did as well. he wasnt the only one in the wrong here; which made her comment hurt even more.
"selina." you spoke a bit irritated now.
"and who are you?" she responded with a smirk even though she knew the answer to that question.
"you’re pitiful."
selinas eyes stayed on you as you spoke, bruce's eyes as well.
"and pathetic, and simply just sad." your voice grew a bit louder as you spoke, a few eyes looking glancing over at you.
he decided not to stop you, considering this could be the last time he saw selina. and everything you were saying was correct, and even though harsh.. it wasn't as bad as the disrespect you two were receiving from her.
"to speak to me and bruce so disgustingly. on your wedding day for that matter?"
selina's husband finally focuses in on the conversation coming from the other side of the church.
"he came to support you, to congratulate you. he's obviously trying to move on." you pause. "but its clear that you aren't. married and all yet you still feel the need to talk to him this way."
selina stood there quietly, most of the eyes in the venue on her to respond. but she doesn't, all she can do is scoff at your false statements; only because they were true.
bruce moves his hand from your back and places it into your hand once again. this time keeping it there, as he grows.. proud. proud to have someone stand up for him.
"i hope marrige life treats you well." he finishes your comments off and shakes his head slight in a bit of disbelief still, of how selina acted.
you squeezed his hand softly. "you look beautiful by the way." you complimented selina with a small smirk, bruce then began to lead you out of the church; considering you said all that was needed to be said.
he was content and proud that he had someone beside him to speak up for him when he couldn't. he knew that he would have to learn to do it on his own, to push a few buttons of the people he loved most, to make himself happy. however, he didn't know to be that selfish, he didn't know that he could. but with you here, he knew that it was possible.
as they began to make their way out of the church, their steps synchronized in the way only long-time friends could manage, bruce found himself feeling oddly at peace. no matter the tension with selina, the history that couldn’t be erased, there was something calming about having (y/n) beside him—someone who had now seen it all, and more. yet still stood beside him.
and in that moment, bruce couldn’t help but feel that maybe, after all these years, some things were worth holding onto. even when the world and people around him had changed.
—————————————————————————————
the wayne family’s common room was quiet, except for the faint sound soft shuffling feet against the polished floors. bruce's children—dick, jason, tim, damian, and cassandra—had gathered around the long table, their minds busy thinking about their father’s relationship with (y/n).
the connection they shared wasn’t just nostalgia—it was history, both tied to their shared trauma of losing their parents. still, it was hard for bruce’s children to see it without having their own thoughts, especially given the timing and circumstances.
“we’ve got to talk about this,” dick began, leaning forward, his fingers lazily tapping on the table. his expression was a mixture of concern and curiosity. “i know we all agreed on the whole intervention thing, but now... after seeing and hearing them together, i kinda have some thoughts.”
jason, leaning against the back of his chair with his arms folded, scoffed. “i still think we should’ve just kept it low-key. but, yeah, i’ll be honest—seeing them together, it’s clear they’ve got something. and, uh, i’m not gonna lie—she was... wow.” he smirked, his eyes flashing. “very attractive. i mean, look at her—dark skin, pretty smile, dimples? gosh.. the way she held herself—absolutely stunning.”
tim drake, ever the observant one, gave jason a side glance. “you’re not gonna stop talking about how beautiful she is, are you?”
jason shot him a look that was half-mocking, half-amused. “what? it’s the truth. she is beautiful. you didn’t see the way dad was looking at her? like he was seeing a ghost—or maybe something more. it’s a good thing i was there to balance the cool factor with my presence.” he grinned.
tim pushes jasons chair softly as he leaned back in it, causing jason to tense and quickly stop.
dick, who was always the one trying to steer things back to the serious side of family matters, raised his hands. “okay, okay. i get it. she’s attractive. but this isn’t just about that, right? we’re talking about dad’s—uh, feelings here. this is bruce wayne we’re talking about, not some casual fling. this is someone who has history with him.”
damian wayne, ever the serious one, frowned at the casual way his brothers were talking. “it’s more than just ‘feelings.’ it’s about responsibility. we can’t just let him get swept up in some emotional distraction.”
he crossed his arms over his chest, clearly annoyed by how his siblings were focusing on appearances. “and even if she is attractive, that doesn't mean she’s the best person for him.”
jason gave damian a knowing smirk. “you’re just mad because you think she’s too perfect for him, and you’re worried she might steal all the attention from you, huh?” he teased, poking fun at his younger brother.
damian shot him a glare. “even if that is what i mean-,” he growled. “you of all people shouldn’t be talking. you’re the last one who should care about what kind of ‘distraction’ this is. you can barely keep your own love life together.”
“okay, okay, let’s all calm down,” tim interjected, holding up a hand to stop the bickering. “we’re all just worried about dad, and i get it. but i think we should start thinking about her, too."
"we’re talking about someone who shares a lot of the same history and pain as dad. she lost her parents too, and it’s clear she understands him in a way most of us don’t. that’s not something we should take lightly.”
“tim’s right,” dick agreed, looking at his brothers more seriously now.
“it’s not just about her looks or what we think might be a ‘distraction.’ she’s someone who gets him. you saw how they were talking. they’re both carrying a lot of the same baggage. that means something.”
jason leaned back in his chair, his eyes thoughtful for a moment. “yeah, i mean, i didn’t expect it to be so... intense. they just met, and it’s like there’s this unspoken bond. and yeah, she’s beautiful, but it’s more than that. she’s familiar with all the crap dad’s been through. we don’t even know how much that could help him.”
tim gave jason a small smile. “exactly. it’s like the pieces are finally falling into place for him. and if we can get to know her better, we might understand more about where his head’s at.”
“not to mention, if she’s really as cool as we think she is, we can’t just write her off as some casual hookup,” dick added. “i mean, she’s been in bruce’s life in some way since he was a kid. we should give her a chance.”
“still...” jason said with a grin, “wow—she could definitely make even batman forget he’s batman.”
damian groaned. “do you have to you keep talking about this? honestly.”
at that moment, cassandra, who had been quietly observing the conversation from the side, finally spoke up. her presence was always calm, and her words were few but always carried weight. she sat down at the table with them, meeting their gazes with a steady calmness.
“you guys talk too much,” she said, crossing her arms with a slight tilt of her head. “we don’t need to rush. we let dad take his time.”
the room quieted immediately. cassandra’s words always carried a certain finality that made the others pause.
“we’ve seen him struggle,” she continued, her voice low and controlled. “and he deserves to decide for himself. if he needs (y/n) in his life, then it’s not up to us to make decisions for him.”
“but what if she’s just another distraction?” damian said, his voice quiet but still full of concern. “what if this hurts him in the end?”
cassandra gave him a knowing look. “we’ve all seen him hurt before, but this... this is different. you can tell. he’s more at peace with her than he’s been with anyone in a long time. it’s not about rushing him. let him take his time. he’s had enough people pushing him around. we don’t need to do that.”
dick, who had been the most open to the idea of letting their father figure things out, nodded thoughtfully. “you’re right. we can’t rush this. if (y/n) is someone who gets him, who shares the same pain and history—then that’s something we need to respect. she’s not just some ‘fling’ to him.”
jason leaned forward, a grin spreading across his face. “so, we’re all in agreement then? we give dad space, but we also get to know her more?”
cassandra glanced at the group before answering. “yes. but we have to be patient. it’s his love life, not ours.”
tim chuckled. “we get it. no more ‘interventions,’ then.”
“i don’t know,” jason mused, “i kind of enjoyed the idea of being the matchmaking bad boy of the family.”
cassandra shot him a sideways glance. “you’re not that smart.”
the room erupted into quiet laughter as the tension finally lifted. they all knew there was still a lot to figure out—about (y/n), about their father, and about what kind of relationship would develop from this unexpected reunion.
but for the first time in a long while, bruce wayne’s children weren’t trying to control his destiny. they were just waiting to see where it led, with patience, understanding, and maybe a little bit of curiosity.
and for once, they were content with that.
fin.
—————————————————————————————
next chapter...
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2cutie · 11 months ago
Note
Since you're opening requests, bi han x fem reader truama bonding over their daddy issues😁
anon, why must you call me out like this? im not saying bi-han could fix my daddy issues, i'm just saying he's very pretty & would probably make them worse. i'd still tap it.
Your relationship, if you could call it one, to your father was strained. Connection was minimal; you were left with an absence in your heart. In your upbringing, you had been brought into the Lin Kuei for being a potentially successful warrior. You were brought in relatively young, so you had mostly grown up with Bi-Han and his brothers.
But after time, the future grandmaster and you had an upspoken bond that you didn't share with others. You two never spoke much about it, but the parallel connection was there. You knew his father for a long enough time before his death to see how alike it was to your own, and the strain he put on Bi-Han. His life seemed akin to yours, specifically with how yours had molded you.
The past trauma you constantly buried down was weighing on you. So you sat alone in one of the gardens of the temple, where you knew minimal people visited. You were in your thoughts, your memories and past, and allowing yourself to wallow solemn. It was your own form of growth.
Bi-Han had been wondering the halls. His mind was rampant with alike thoughts and couldn't focus on his work. He's no better at healthily dealing with emotions, so instead of trying to manage and work through them, he decided to walk and let the thoughts drift off naturally.
He ended up passing through the gardens and saw you there, sitting on the bench. He didn't pay much mind at first, instead quickening his pace since he wanted minimal interaction in his avoidant state.
But you weren't moving. Barely blinking. You were typically a bit more on the hyperactive side. He wasn't used to such a… phlegmatic stance from you.
The more he looked, the more he saw the barely-there glaze in your eyes.
Bi-Han may not have the greatest grip on emotions but he could identify them in another person. He found himself approaching you. He eventually sat beside you, though you didn't seem to notice right away.
You didn't state anything, but he seemed to know where your thoughts were,; as if yours and his mind were intertwining. It's like he heard your unbridled emotions you never spoke to, ones he knew. It gave him a reason to sit and reflect.
As he stayed, he looked to you. He thought to the past you shared. About how much had changed, and how much older you were now. It was something he never took the time to think about, but your silence was so off-kilter that it made you seem too old. Too hurt and scarred for your age. He never would admit that he preferred your normal persona to this absent visage of you.
But mostly, he didn't want you to be like him. To become what he was, vacant and distant; the byproduct of his father's teachings. It didn't suit you.
Your eyes blinked then, like you heard his rampant thought. A gleam shone in them, even if it was faint. You moved for the first in quite some time. You met each other's eyes and there was an understanding there. As if your eyes could speak the memories that haunted you, as if they were displaying each of your younger selves that you both hid away, and still hid deep inside that stayed sheltered.
Your thoughts were between your father and life before the Lin Kuei. You had never even found solace in Bi-Han's father, either. There was a mutual estranged relationships there.
But the reciprocal bond had subjected you both to an understanding of the other. He could speak with his eyes and you could speak with yours, with no need for words. There would be no need to display emotions you both hid. The volumes your eyes spoke were parallel to each other's suffering. You were in sync to each other without having your problems being exactly the same.
You saw how Bi-Han never accepted his father's teachings. How he grew indifferent to them, and seemed outcasted by his father. It was why he wanted to break tradition, and it seemed only you had noticed that. Only you respected that. And that brought solace to him; a peace he could not find in anyone else.
You then moved closer to him, just a bit. Just until both of your arms would press against each other. It was ever subtle, but it was an evident sign of trust. Of comfort. For both you and him.
Bi-Han's eyes would follow the movement. It was a simple gesture, but it resonated within him. He was devoid to expression, but even he could be affected by such a simple gesticulation. And yours were one he could never deny. One he could feel at ease with.
It was a elusive display that you both cared for each other, just not in an expressive way.
He would stay with you then, until you felt better. Until you gained yourself again, or even just a small fragment. He didn't care how long it would take. There weren't many words to say, even less that needed to be spoken.
You stayed alone in the garden together, in each other's mutual comfort of each other and that was enough for the both of you. To be vulnerable with each other yet still maintain a front. You both saw past each other's exterior. You were one of the same.
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conanssummerchild · 4 months ago
Text
ive dipped my toes into a little bit of unserious fic writing for rnm and i felt it was about time i dropped an autistic rick fic 🫡
ive had this idea circling around in my head for a while but i wasn't really sure what direction the fic would go in but ive decided to go for some good old internalised ableism (me writing angst? shocking /sarc) bcs rick never seems to see his autism as a disadvantage which is super slay BUT there is also a lot of difficult things to deal with being autistic and you know that old fucker hates admitting he needs help with anything so im gonna fucking force him to >:) this is set in like maybe season 2 or early season 3 btw just to make rick even less inclined to admit he needs any help !!
ok enough yapping, here we gooo
~~~
It was awfully quiet in the house for a Saturday afternoon. Usually by now Rick would've come barging into the living room, demanding Morty come with him and tugging him through a portal without waiting for an affirmative answer, always at least a little drunk on whatever he could get his hands on.
Today there was none of that, only fragrant smells of whatever dinner Jerry was cooking coming from the kitchen, juxtaposed with the harsh screaming match going on between him and Beth. Summer was scrolling on her phone absently next to Morty on the sofa as he pretended to watch some film that Jerry insisted was a masterpiece on non-interdimensional TV.
Overall, it was a normal night at the Smith's house from before Rick had come into their lives, but Morty wasn't relaxed like he would've been before, or even upset over having to listen to his parents' petty argument. No, he was ansty, fidgeting around enough to earn several annoyed glances from Summer.
He combed back through his memories, doubting whether he'd seen Rick today at all. He hadn't been at lunch or breakfast, in fact Morty hadn't seen him at all since their brief adventure yesterday, during which Rick had been in an increasingly foul mood. Had no one else even noticed his disappearance?
"I'm gonna check on Rick." He blurted out, stumbling off the sofa.
Summer didn't even spare him a glance.
He tried not to run down the hallway, nervous jitters going through his whole body. What if he had left again? No, probably not, Morty had seen his ship in the driveway. Shit– Rick had thousands of enemies, what if he was lying dead in his room right now?
Morty knocked on Rick's door so hard his knuckles stung a little, ignoring the small buzzing sound that accompanied the knocks. He heard a groan akin to one of a dying man and some shuffling from inside the room.
"Rick?" Morty called out to no answer, anxiety only rising.
He shifted nervously from foot to foot. If he just barged into Rick's room and he was fine Rick would be super pissed, but if he didn't and Rick was dying Morty would never forgive himself.
He shoved the door open. It didn't have a lock anymore. Morty held his breath as his eyes darted around the room, he feared it would look like a crime scene, but it looked... normal. He hadn't been in Rick's room that many times but, despite the darkness and slight mess, nothing seemed particularly out of place.
Well, that was, of course, apart from the translucent green force field type thing in front of the door.
He frowned, calling Rick's name again, but he was lying in his cot, facing the wall, unresponsive. Not even seeming like he'd heard Morty, the rise and fall of his tense shoulders the only thing showing he was still alive.
Morty chanced a careful touch to the force field, preparing for some kind of electric shock, but none came, only a quiet hum was emmited as Morty's fingers passed through. Rick moved again slightly, but other than that showed no visible reaction.
The field gave way easily and Morty passed though completely, standing meekly at the doorway of Rick's room. He was surprised to find that it was silent, like completely. No sound passed through the green barrier, not the sounds of sizzling pans, or the movie playing faintly in the background. Nothing.
"Rick? A-are you okay?" It wasn't said particularly loudly, but it felt that way in the complete silence.
No answer. He took a step closer, repeating himself louder, in case Rick just hadn't heard. "Rick? W-what's– is everything good?"
He expected anything, from Rick yelling at him to the person in the bed just being an alien wearing Rick's face, not even Rick himself.
He didn't expect Rick to cover his ears and curl into himself further.
"Uh-" Morty hesitated. His head hurt? Was he, like, hungover? Dying?
He only paused for a second more before turning and running out of the room, if something really was greviously wrong with Rick he would much rather be safe than sorry.
"Mom!" He called, running into the kitchen, interrupting the argument going on abruptly.
Beth downed a large sip of her wine glass, emptying it and setting it down on the counter with a sharp clink.
"Morty, honey, the adults are talking right now." She said, rubbing her temples tiredly.
"Mom, something's w-w-wrong with Rick."
"What?" That got Beth's attention, straightening from where she was topping off her wine once more. "What's wrong with Rick?"
"I don't know." Morty replied, agitated. "He's in his room just– just lying there, he's not answering me."
Beth was already heading in the direction of his room—not without grabbing her wine. "Come on, sweetie." She said to Morty.
"Wha- Beth, come on! We were having a conversation here!" Jerry exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air.
"I have more important things to deal with right now, Jerry." She said coldly.
Jerry's complaints were drowned out by Morty's rushing thoughts as he led Beth down the hall.
She peeked into the dark room without passing the noise-cancelling field, expression changing when she saw Rick curled into a ball, hands still clamped over his ears. While her frown stayed, a sort of realisation flashed in her eyes.
"Um, I think your grandpa just needs a little bit of alone time right now, okay? Let's give him some space." She said, taking a step back and closing the door gently.
"What? Why?"
"He just... Well, honestly, I don't know. I just vaguely remember he would get like this sometimes when I was a kid, when he was stressed. Mom always told me to just leave him alone for a while. I thought he'd probably grown out of it, like it was a midlife crisis thing or whatever. Guess not." She gave a small shrug.
That didn't really answer any of Morty's questions and raised several more, but Beth didn't seem to have the answers.
"Okay."
"Okay." Beth echoed, taking a swig of wine, her demeanour changing back to a bored one. "Well, I gotta go deal with Jerry now, go play video games, or something."
For the rest of that day, and then one more after that, Morty waited anxiously for Rick to emerge from his room. He felt like he was losing his mind, all while everyone else didn't even seem to care that Rick was gone at all.
He was picking at his pancakes uninterestedly when he finally caught a glimpse of blue hair in the hallway.
"Rick!" He exclaimed, making the old man nearly jump out of his skin.
"Jesus fucking christ, M-Morty." He muttered, grabbing some orange juice from the fridge and downing it straight from the carton.
"What happened?" Morty asked, getting up from the table and hovering by Rick. No one told him off for leaving the table. He could tell that they were all listening in on the conversation.
"What happened when?" Rick asked dismissively, playing dumb. He rummaged around in the overhead cupboard until he found an opened box of wafers. "What– who the fuck opened my wafers?"
Morty rolled his eyes. "You did, last week."
"Oh yeah." Rick shoved a wafer in his mouth.
"Rick, come on, seriously, I was worried."
"Well then maybe you should mind your own business, Morty."
Morty huffed. "What so you'd prefer I didn't care about you at all?"
"Yes. Obviously. Why does that surprise you? I've clearly stated it on multiple occasions."
"Well, I'm sorry, but I do care about you, Rick. I just want to make sure you're okay, because it seemed like you weren't" Morty said earnestly.
"Ugh, I'm fine, Morty." He scowled. "Don't be so– so weird about it."
"I'm weird?! Y-you're the weird one, Rick! Wh-what the hell is wrong with you? You just dissapear for– for two days and won't even tell me why? Can you give half a shit about anyone but yourself?"
"Jesus, I was overstimulated! O-okay? I'm autistic! Is that what you want to hear? You– you fucking dick."
Morty shook his head lightly, processing the stream of information "...What?"
"What? You can't be autistic." Jerry chimed in from the dining room.
"Okay, Jerry, and you won't be alive when I stuff your tiny dick in your mouth and freeze you, so we can put you on the mantle like some kind of fucked up decoration with your balls hanging out. Wait, actually, you will be alive. You'll feel the whole thing. Suuuper painful."
Rick snatched up Morty's virtually untouched stack of pancakes and sauntered out.
A quiet washed over the table, Morty looking over at Beth and seeing that she seemed just as surprised as him.
"What, you guys seriously didn't know?" Summer's bored voice broke through the silence.
"Y- you did?" Morty asked incredulously.
"Uh, duhh, Morty. It's like super obvious?" Summer drawled, not even looking up from whoever she was texting on her phone.
"How is it obvious?!"
"Becuase, Morty, I'm not uneducated like all of you guys."
"What? Wh-whatever, I'm just– I'm gonna go talk to him."
Summer didn't grace him with a response.
Morty peered into Rick's room but he wasn't there, so he wandered towards the garage. As he approached, he could already hear the sounds of Rick tinkering with something or other.
"H-hey, Rick." He said carefully, but Rick didn't seem particularly upset, offering Morty a small grunt in greeting.
"S-sorry I said there was something wrong with you." Morty added.
Rick looked up this time, quirking an eyebrow at him. "Okay?"
He went back to his project for a bit, but when Morty still didn't leave after several minutes he sighed, setting his wrench down harshly next to Morty's now half-eaten pancakes. "Yes, Morty?" He asked, irritated.
"I-I just... You could've told me, you know? That you're autistic. I'm not– you don't have to be, like... ashamed."
"Screw you, I'm not ashamed." Rick snapped. "L-look at me Morty, do you know how smart I am? You think any fucking neurotypical could ever reach my level of genius? Fuck no!"
He crossed his arms like a petulant child, pouting at the floor.
"Oh– Sorry." Morty stuttered. "I just thought..."
"What? That just because I'm autistic I have to be ashamed? Pretty ableist stuff there, Morty." Rick said sharply.
"No! Jeez, That's not– not what I meant, Rick. Jeez... I was gonna ask why you never t-talk about it, then?"
"Becuase it's none of y-your damn business, that's why."
"But– I mean, sure, but not even my mom knew. Did... did your wife? Did she know?"
Rick's shoulders tensed and he looked away, his loose grip on the table becoming harsher.
"R-rick?"
"She... knew." He said tightly.
"Did anyone else?" Morty made his tone a little gentler, seeing Rick wasn't exactly thrilled to talk about it.
"...Birdperson. And Squanchy."
"That's– no one else?"
Rick frowned. "My parents knew. But they didn't like it... Diane– my wife she was the first person I chose to tell myself."
"I'm sorry." Morty said quietly. "About your parents and... Diane."
Rick sat silently, staring at the work bench in front of him without saying a word.
"Is that... why you guys divorced, or?"
"No, Morty, jesus." Rick huffed. "She was actually the only one that didn't treat me like less than because of it. I mean, until BP and Squanch."
"So why–?"
"I don't want to talk about my failed marriage, M-morty." Rick sighed.
"...Sorry."
Rick shrugged.
Silence stretched on as Rick went back to his project again, it wasn't an uncomfortable silence, but it wasn't exactly comfortable either.
"It's embarrasing. Sometimes." Rick said haltingly. "When I get overstimulated. Becuase I know that doesn't happen to normal people and I don't like admitting I need help with things that other people don't. It's a sign of weakness."
"That's not–!"
"Shut the fuck up, Morty. This isn't a discussion, you got what you wanted out of me, so now you can fuck off."
"But, Rick you–"
"Morty, just fuck the fuck off."
Morty hesitated for a second, before lunging towards Rick and trapping him in a tight hug. Rick tensed up.
"Morty, you little shit, get off me!" Rick wriggled, trying to get out of Morty's embrace.
"I love you, grandpa. Thank you for opening up to me, I know it's hard for you." Morty whispered, which only made Rick thrash around harder. "I don't think you're weak, by the way. Or that there's anything wrong with you."
Morty finally pulled away from the hug and Rick crossed his arms again, his face now a little flushed in embarrasment.
"Don't do that again, you asshole." He grumbled. "I don't like it when you hug me."
"Sorry." Morty said, mostly meaning it. "Hugs always make me feel a lot better."
"Well I'm not you, Morty, and they m-m-make me uncomfortable."
"Sorry." He repeated. "But I-I still mean everything I said."
Rick pouted, turning away. Morty knew Rick was stubborn, and that he wasn't going to erase years of self-hatred and internalised ableism in a few minutes, but he hoped that one day Rick let him in enough to at least try.
"Okay, bye grandpa. Love you."
"Bye, asshole." Rick muttered back.
Love you too he thought, but didn't say.
+ extra
Rick had been in a shitty mood all day, and Morty could tell something was brewing under the surface, but he couldn't tell what until they were already on their way back home from grabbing some crystals from some drug planet Rick stole from all the time.
Usually Rick would be in high spirits after another succesful crystal-stealing mission, but today he just glared through the windshield, gripping the steering wheel tightly. Morty could tell that, despite his intense stare, he wasn't really paying too much attention, so it wasn't a huge shock when an large asteroid chunk flew into their field of vision and Rick didn't even try to swerve.
They crashed into the asteroid hard and an alarm started blaring, red rays flashing in the interior of the spaceship. Rick's hands flew over his ears, squeezing his eyes shut tightly.
Morty had seen this alarm go off several times, due to Rick's often reckless driving, and it usually didn't bother Rick very much at all, not warranting more than a curse and flipping the alarm off annoyedly.
Rick bit down on his knee hard as Morty hurried to shut down the alarm, Rick's hands moving into his hair and tugging when it was finally switched off.
Rick had a tendancy to hurt himself when he was overstimulated and it made Morty endlessly anxious. He searched desperately in the backseat for the noise cancelling headphones he'd given Rick and "forced him to wear" as Rick would say, but Morty could tell he appreciated it. Especially when he snatched them out of Morty's hands before he'd barely even handed them to him, shoving them onto his head agressively and clicking the button he'd added himself for improved noise cancellation, claiming the headphones were trash and that he'd had to modify them to make them at all a useful tool.
He slumped back in his chair with a sigh, his eyes were still shut but Morty could see the tears that had collected on his eyelashes.
"Do you want me to drive us back?" Morty asked, barely finishing the sentance before Rick was hitting the button that switched their chairs around so Morty would be in front of the wheel. Morty let out a small exclamation of surprise, but quickly took the wheel, putting the ship back on track.
Rick didn't say anything else for the short journey home, jumping out of the ship before it was even parked properly. Morty hurried to keep up with him as he unlocked the door. He stopped abruptly in the middle of the entryway and Morty almost crashed into him, managing to stop himself just in time.
"Thank you." Rick said gruffly, not giving Morty time to respond and just rushing off to his room.
Morty still smiled, though. He knew that was about as close as it got to his grandpa expressing affection.
"Love you too, Rick."
---
THE END IM CHEESEY OK I KNOW SORRY BYE
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autumnywinter · 8 months ago
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Im crazy for this blog! Do you mind writing for yandere Baizhu or some hcs? Maybe a modern au?
Baizhu's more just a clinician than a pharmacist here because I'm obsessed with yandere doctors. It's been a while since I wrote for him, I'm not very confident in this but I hope it's still good ^^
Yandere!Baizhu x Reader
TW: Heavily implied noncon somnophilia, drugging, doctor/patient, gaslighting
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You had been seeing and hearing things. It started with little noises outside of your window at night, rustling and shuffling. It scared you, but not enough to do anything about it. Next thing you knew, you swore you were seeing white flashes through your window at odd hours of the night. You'd look out the window, and there'd be not a thing in sight except for the stillness of the night.
It got worse.
Items of your possession began to go missing, mostly clothing, oftentimes dirty. You told yourself it was probably due to your own absent-mindedness, but you knew deep down that something was wrong.
The thing that set you off was when you'd wake up sore and hurting. There'd be scratch marks on your arms and back, and bruises you swore were hickeys on your shoulders and neck. They were in places you couldn't have reached yourself. Your mind had jumped to the worst case scenario, and you were terrified.
Yet your trusted doctor brushed it all off, saying you were getting hallucinations and stressing yourself out far too much. He claimed what you were so sure were hickeys, were actually just bruises. He said you were likely a sleep walker due to your increased stress, hence it made sense that you'd unintentionally hurt yourself while asleep. You'd bought into his reasoning, because he'd always been so trustworthy and reliable.
He gave you medication to help you, but you couldn't help but feel like what he prescribed made it worse. You found yourself more groggy than usual, and often having nightmares. You felt physically sick most days.
But Doctor Baizhu was so trustworthy, you felt like it was the right choice.
You noticed how his fingers would linger longer than they should whenever he took your pulse. You noticed how his eyes would dilate when staring at you for just a bit too long. You noticed how his touch felt wrong, like there was something else behind it. But you were just being paranoid, just as Baizhu said.
"Feeling sick again?" Baizhu's cold hand pressed against your forehead. The touch sent a shiver coursing through your body, the sharp contrast in temperature setting your nerves on edge.
"Yeah," you managed. Your voice was barely a whisper.
"That's unfortunate," Baizhu sighed. He clicked his tongue a few times in thought. "Well, if you continue taking this medicine, you should start feeling better soon. Although I'm starting to worry the side-effects are a pain. I have something else to try, so if you would just give me a moment..."
Baizhu walked off to the other end of the room, leaving you alone. You swallowed hard, wincing slightly at the uncomfortable feeling. Your throat was always dry lately, and you found yourself struggling to swallow, let alone eat. You wished you could sleep, but the nightmares always left you a groggy mess. You could never remember them, only that they were terrifying.
"Ah, here we are," Baizhu smiled, snapping you from your thoughts. He had a bottle of pills, shaking out one singular white one. "It'll dissolve in your mouth. It's to help ease your nausea. I know you haven't been keeping anything down well lately. Hopefully this should help."
You extended a hand, to which he placed it in your palm. Were doctors even allowed to give out pills directly? You weren't sure, but shrugged it off. You popped it into your mouth, and Baizhu was right. It quickly dissolved, and you were surprised that it didn't have a funny taste. You were expecting something bitter or awful, but there was nothing.
"It'll take some time to kick in," Baizhu assured you. "I'd like it if you stayed here until it does. It might make you a little dizzy."
"Sure," you nodded. You had no reason to distrust Baizhu, despite every fibre of your being telling you something was wrong.
The medicine kicked in quickly. Within ten minutes, you were feeling a bit weird, like you were floating. Your head was lighter. Baizhu noticed you swaying and pushed you gently onto the examination table.
"Dizzy?" he asked.
"Uh huh," you replied dumbly.
"Stay lying down," he instructed. Your vision was spinning and your head was empty, so empty you could hardly process the fact he was digging into your belongings and then leaving the room. You wanted to ask him where he was going, but couldn't find the energy. Instead, you let yourself lay there, staring at the ceiling as it spun round and round.
Baizhu came back, rolling in a wheelchair. He lifted you up with a quiet groan, and set you gently into the seat, draping a blanket over you. It was scratchy and thin.
"We're going for a walk," Baizhu said. He wheeled you out, and as loopy as you were, a spike of hazy panic hit you when you saw him leading you to a car in the parking lot that wasn't yours. You tried to protest, but Baizhu cooed, petting your hair and whispering sweet nothings.
"Shhh, it'll be okay. Everything is fine. We're going home."
Baizhu opened the passenger side door, pushing the chair close. He lifted you out with a low grunt. You felt weightless in his arms, like a feather. He buckled you in, and his minty breath ghosted across your face.
"I love you," he murmured.
You passed out before his lips could even touch yours.
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graciegoeskrazy · 9 months ago
Text
undo
matty healy + teen!daughter!reader
warnings: teenage pregnancy, yelling, mentions of absent mother, lmk
a/n: it’s not how i wanted it to be but I’ve been holding onto it for too long so im sorry to the anon who requested if it didn’t live up to your expectations. ok lave uo bai.
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The thought has been intruding on your train of thought for the past week and a half. Your period was about a week late now which wasn't unusual. You’re a young woman with a growing body - it happens every once in a while. But that paired with the other unusual symptoms and the fact you had an interesting night about a month ago led to the quiet panicking voices inside your head.
It was simple as you were bored, you called up an old friend, he had ulterior motives, and you had no objection to it. It was a fun night in the end, and no hint of regret showed itself, until now.
You knew you needed to talk to your dad. You knew you needed his help. Usually, things like this weren't a big deal for the two of you. He gave you the talk and every single time you groaned and complained about your period he helped you through all of it, not once showing any hint of discomfort. I guess that’s what happens when you grow up with a single dad and no female mother figure. This was different. This was unpredictable.
You planned to tell him as soon as you got home. Or at least that was the plan. That plan was thrown out the window when you opened the door and were greeted with George’s voice
“I’m home!” You said. The dogs came to welcome you home immediately, as they always did.
“Kitchen!” George said. You mentally cursed yourself.
The two of you talked about your day, his day, and other stupid things to pass the time. Meanwhile Matty watched from the other corner of the table. He noticed something was off. You looked and sounded normal, but there was something that didn't belong. You seemed on edge to him, as if you were waiting for something to happen. No matter how hard you try to hide something, you can’t hide it from your dad. “You alright, Love?” He asked, taking a sip from his drink.
“Yeah, fine.” You said, taking a breath, finally meeting his eyes. He was wearing his usual white shirt and dress pants. However, his hair was a mess and he had this look in his eye. One that you knew all too well. He knew something was up.
By now, George caught wind of your act.“Are you sure? You look pale almost.” He reached a hand up to touch your cheek. You moved his hand away and smiled. “I’m fine George. I swear.”
He sighed and took a sip of his drink. “Alright.”
“I’m gonna go start homework.” You said, turning away and heading upstairs.
Matty followed you with his eyes. “Ok…dinner in 20.” You looked back and gave a slight smile.
Once they heard a slam of your door they were quiet. That was until George said, “That’s suspicious.”
Matty agreed, “I’ll go investigate in a bit. For now, just let her be.”
You put your backpack down and immediately ran to your bathroom. This was the 3rd time you threw up today. It could be just nausea. It could be the fact that virus’s are going around or that your period had been acting up or whatever. Or at least that’s what you’ve been telling yourself.
The thoughts of you have to do it, you have to tell him, you’ll have to do it eventually, all swelled in your head and led to anadreline rush of some sort. Whatever it was, it gave you enough energy and courage to go downstairs and face him.
You feet were working your faster than your brain could. By the time it caught up you had planted your feet in front of your dad, looking at him expectantly.
He had a drink in his hand, waiting. He took another sip then, “You alright there?”
You swallowed. “I have to tell you something.”
His eyebrow quirked. “Okayyyy…what is it?”
You sighed. “I’m…” As you were about to say it, you met his eyes which halted your movements. “Really excited for dinner.”
He chuckled. “That’s it?”
“Yep.” You said, popping the ‘p’
“Bye.” You turned around and headed for the stairs bt your dad lightly grabbed your arm, pulling you back.
“Woah, woah, hold on. What’s going on?” He asked, genuine concern painted on his face.
“Nothing.” You said.
He laughed, “So that’s a lie.” He put his drink down to give his full attention to you. “What’s going on, baby?”
At the touch of his gentle hand on your arm and his soothing voice, one you;\’ve grown accustomed to for years, a dam you never realized you;ve been holding in broke. “I don’t know how to say it.”
He shushed you, soothingly, “Just say it.”
“I can’t.”
“Why?”
You finally turned your gaze to him. “Because I don't want you to hate me.”
He went to hug you, but you pushed him away. “Tell me what’s happened. You're scaring me.”
You tried to catch your breath but it was no use. Eventually you just gave in. “I’m pregnant!” You shouted.
“You’re what?” he asked, his tone growing serious.
You took your time but your eyes slowy met his. Once you looked up you also saw george peeking hsi head out from the kitchen.
“Pregnant.” You repeated. “Or I think I might be. I don’t know?” Your breathing started to get heavy again. “I don't know what’s going on. All I know is that I’m scared and I don't know what to do.”
You expected him to reply. To ethier scream or soothe you, but he stood still. It just sent your nervousness over the edge. “Someone say something, or do something for crying out loud!”
He swallowed. “What do you mean you think?” He asked hesitantly.
“I’ve been throwing up throughout the day for the last week. I’ve been having awful cramps. I’ve been bloated, I…”
“Jesus.”
“My period is over a week late now.”
“Y/n Healy!” And here it was, the reaction you dreaded and expected.
“I got carried away! You were out on tour, and I was alone and-”
“Do not pin this on me, young lady.”
“I’m not! I’m just explaining myself-”
He started to get really red. “You’re 16 y/n! You can’t just run around having sex with the first person you see!”
“Oh, and what a good example you’ve shown me.”
He had enough. “Upstairs. Now.”
You turned on your heels, and went straight up to your room, doing your best to keep everything in until you got upstairs.
Your dad was about 18 when your mom got pregent and they had you. She went back and forth for awhile, but eventually decided to leave the day you were born, saying it was for the best and blah blah blah. He promised t give you the best he could, and for the most part he did. Maybe you could do the same?
Your thoughts wer cut short by the knocking on your door. It had been about an hour since the ‘incident’ downstairs. “Baby?” His tone was soft. “George got a test for you.”
You stood still. You’re cries continued, as they did for the past hour.
“Tell me what happened.” He said. He held no anger or demand in his voice. Just concern.
You sat there, took a breath and sat on the other side of your door while u spoke. Matty mirrored you from the outside. “I just got carried away one day. I met up with an old friend and-“ You trailed off, hoping he would get the point without having you go into detail. “I messed up Dad.”
He sighed as you continued to sob on the other side. “It’ll be okay.”
Your emotions were nearing a full 10 right now. “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry. Please don’t hate me.”
He turned so he was facing the door. Hoping you would open it as soon as he spoke “I don’t hate you. I could never hate you.” He sounded casual. “It’s gonna be okay-“
“You don’t know that!”
“I do! I was 17 when I became a dad. And we didn’t turn out too bad, right?” He smiled.
You buried you head in your hands. “God, I’m such a slut.”
“Hey! You are not a slut. You’re just…human.” You laughed. He was happy he was able to make you giggle, even if he couldn’t see it and it only lasted a millisecond. “Take the test. Whatever it says, we’ll figure it out.”
You stood up to open the door. “Don’t come in. I mean, can you just slide it though?”
He leaned his head on the door frame. “Whatever you need my dear.” Slowly, the door opened. You reached your hand out and he put the box in your hands. Once you closed the door he spoke. “Take your time, I’ll be right here.”
Those ten minutes seemed to be the longest of your life. 2 of them consisted of sitting on the toilet and staring at it. Not the test - the test in the wrapper. Some shock of adrenaline (most likely just your need to pee) pushed you to rip it open and place it in between your legs without giving it another thought. You cleaned yourself off and placed it facedown on the counter and set a timer.
You paced and paced and paced. You thought maybe you should go to your dad. What you two talk about for those 5 minutes? What happened? No you can’t talk about those details with your dad. You two were as close as can be but even some things needed to stay sacred. You thought about him. The ‘father’ of the baby you weren’t sure existed or not. He went to another school across town, a mutual friend. He was a year or two older. It didn’t matter though. All the consequences, every single move you made in the past couple weeks, were about you. He could do whatever the hell he wanted. He could be a father or not. It didn’t matter. It was you the consequences fell back on. you. And you were paying for them now.
The timer rang and you grabbed the test without a second thought.
You sobbed.
It was negative. If anything you should be cheering. Screaming. from the rooftops that your life was nowhere near over and you were t getting yourself into a whirlwind of trouble and physical and mental pain. But you cried.
You opened the door. Your dad stoped his movements and looked at you expectantly. He was pacing too just moments before.
“It’s Negative.” You said.
He sighed a breath a relief and hugged you. You continued to sob into him. “Why are you crying?” he whispered.
You muffled into his chest. “Because I didn’t want to let you down.”
He looked at you. “You could never, my love.”
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