#if you feel like the question even a little bit describes u even occasionally the mh industry takes it as a positive

[theholidayslingerlikebadperfume]

"why do they word this sx in a way that will make you misinterpret the question if you have this sx" because that's the point. these tests are not thought up with self dxing in mond, they are thought up with the idea that you will be in a room with a license professional and if you read that question and you go "what does everything mean" the professional will see it as you showing the sx. these are meant to be done with another person who knows what, in this case, allistic looks like so when you start behaving autistically by asking questions about the questions and explaining your process, they are like oh ur autistic if that makes sense.

thats why you should always start ur self dx journey with the dsm criteria because that helps you understand what the professionals are looking for and you can look at the intention of the questions themselves. the wording is shitty on purpose imho.

When I was younger and researching the autism diagnosis criteria and symptoms, I thought “oh I couldn’t POSSIBLY be autistic.” Because when I read “takes everything literally” I thought it literally meant EVERYTHING and I was like “I don’t take EVERYTHING literally, just most things!” And I just realized the other day that it didn’t actually mean EVERYTHING and that was an overstatement.

[seishiroh]

— it felt like the world / nagi seishiro x reader.

— hurt/comfort (i think). light angst (real). established relationship & break-up. timeskips. pro-player!nagi.

when you were seventeen, figuring out that nagi seishiro didn't mind you at all felt like the world.

when you hand him your heart on a silver platter and his gaze is warm and he replies okay, (like you're meant to understand what okay even means) there's a brush of pink on his cheeks.

he takes your hand because you're walking home together, pauses, then speaks, "i don't know how to be a boyfriend though…"

your answer is a smile, like you're happy enough just to be with him.

"just be yourself, nagi." you say.

he can do that—be himself. it's easy and being with you is easy, too. being with you feels nice, even if he isn't quite sure how to describe it—that should be enough for now. thinking too much about it is too much of a hassle anyway.

it's enough for quite a long while, actually. up until he's inside the blue lock building and reo is persuading him to stay.

"this is lame, though. i'd rather go home to y/n," he says.

but ego jinpachi and reo knew exactly just what to say to keep him in blue lock. after that, you're stuck with occasional calls and a few texts.

even with this, even just a little bit, nagi starts feeling like he's a world away. it’s probably the puppy love of it all, that you want more of his time with you. you're reckless enough to let that thought slip through when you're talking to him. 

"what if you get eliminated, though?"

"hmm? s'not possible, reo won't let that happen…" and nagi sounds so sure of himself, all the time.

"you'll be gone for much longer, then?"

"i guess. training is such a pain. i just want to sleep and play games with you."

you laugh a little, silently, because he sounds so sleepy teetering the edge of knocking out.

"i wish they'd let you out, though. even just for a day… you feel so far away…" you trail off, the silence follows you, and you think he's finally asleep.

you wish him goodnight before hanging up, before the corners of your lips quiver into a frown.

it takes nagi two days.

two days after your last call, there's a knock on your door just as you finish watering choki.

when you open your front door and find your boyfriend standing there, phone blaring with the sound of his game, eyes trained to the screen—you can't help but hold your breath. there’s an echo of game over through the speakers of his phone before his grey eyes finally meet yours.

then, nagi smiles. he slips his phone inside his pocket, places his hand on top of your head, then leads you inside as if he owned the place.

but ah, well… with the love you had for him, you’d probably let him have all that was yours anyway.

all you get is a day with him, but it's enough for you to feel like your chest is expanding, like you're full of affection just for him. he seems different already from your time apart, but it's a good different and you're happy for him.

he's cuddled up against you and you feel like this is all you'll ever want—him. you've only been together for a few months and he seems rough around the edges, but you're starting to understand that nagi's love language is the way he's always touching you and pressing soft kisses against your skin like he's constantly telling you, silently letting you know, that he loves you.

but all you get is a day, then he's back in blue lock. the next time you see him is in the bleachers of their match against the JPN U-20 team and you're nothing short of captivated. it feels surreal to see him in the field like this, beaming with energy—he looks like he belongs with the stars, like he's exactly where he's meant to be.

there’s no question about him going pro. he will. and even when he starts feeling like he’s worlds away again, you couldn’t possibly love him less.

until he had to leave you.

you're standing opposite from each other in your living room. you're upset because you don’t want him to go, he can tell, but he's unyielding.

"this is something i want, though," he tells you, just factually, like this is just something you had to accept without a fight.

it's funny, because you had a lot of fight in you, actually. but you wanted him so bad, loved him so much.

in the end, you could only pray that the long distance works.

at twenty-one, nagi leaves you to join a team in england. he leaves you with choki and a promise he'd come back, visit you when he can. but each day spent without him, your chest empties out the affection it had once been full of. it's slow because nagi actually loved you, you knew this. he called as much as he could, he'd tell you to watch him play through the television and once in a while, rare as it is, there's a bouquet of flowers at your front door.

love is enough except when he comes home to you briefly for your anniversary, nagi knows something is wrong. somehow, despite the warmth in your eyes and your happiness that he’s there, you’re privy to his touch.

like he’s completely unfamiliar to you.

it doesn’t stop him from proposing, it doesn’t stop you from saying yes. you keep thinking you don’t want him to slip from your fingertips but nagi knows you’re slipping from his. he moves in with you, you're hopeful again.

it wouldn't kill you if you couldn't hold his hand whenever you want. you think perhaps this is enough. it had to be.

it doesn’t stop him from flying back to england after. he still called as much as he could—but the time difference remains difficult, the press is ruthless with assumptions when nagi's partnered up with models in brand endorsements, and nagi hears less of you when he's too tired from his games. eventually, you stopped picking up every call because you'd rather be busy with your life than wonder what your lover was up to, miles away from you and knowing this wasn't enough.

you realise it when your heart is finally breaking, that you’re asking this over the phone instead of right in front of him.

“my parents have been asking, seishiro… when are we getting married?”

you've been engaged for over a year and no plans have been made—but it’s worse when you’re met with silence. the future blurs further, you’re not sure if you could do this alone anymore because this was his decision. when he said he’d come back, you probably should’ve asked how long he’d be gone from you.

“we can figure it out when the contract ends, planning a wedding's a pain anyway,” he mutters through the phone.

“but i want you home, sei.” and it’s the most honest you’ve ever been to him in the past two years.

“i can’t just leave, though,” he replies. you wonder if he'd ever thought the same two years ago, before he left you.

you wonder if it would be petty of you to ask if he ever thought he couldn't just leave you.

he gets a vacation on the next year, just a year before his contract with manshine city ends. but you’re with him on the couch when he tells you he’s being offered a better contract in spain. that he wants to take it. you want to be happy for him, but the breaking of your heart is loud enough in your own ears. it’s so loud that the words slipping from your mouth are unfiltered and uttered without thought.

“what about us, sei? what about me?”

nagi frowns like he doesn’t understand what you mean.

“it's not like we're in a hurry to get married, y/n. we can just do it whenever.”

“would you leave me then, too?”

"it doesn't matter, we'd still be together." but you couldn't give him the answer he wants and the ring on your finger is starting to feel heavier.

your silence is all that he's met with and the uncertainty frustrates him. if he's honest, realising you might not want to be with him anymore hurts. so instead he asks again, "do we have to figure this out now?"

"you've been away from me for years, sei. when will you come home? or am i just not worth staying around for?"

he stands from the couch, phone in hand, "i dunno, maybe you're not."

he says it so nonchalantly. as if it wasn't enough to break you. you know he's about to walk out the door, leave again.

"i miss you, you know. i want to feel like you still love me… but you're so far away from me," you try while you're watching him shrug his hoodie on, reaching for his keys.

watching him leave.

"you've been saying this for years. you're just being a pain, y/n."

then he's out the door.

one week later and six years of your relationship with nagi runs down the drain.

you wonder what hurts more: letting him go or in another universe, being married to him while you're stuck apart from each other—because leaving you was easy.

your place is rid of nagi's things, it isn't much, he simply loads it up in the back of his car. for either of you, it's yet to sink in.

until you're slipping the diamond ring from your finger, standing in front of him.

"take care, nagi," you tell him with a tight smile, the ring falling into the palm of his hand and an ache settling heavy on his chest.

he hums, eyes trained on the ring he got for you. he says okay and then he's driving off. you're left to wonder where you go from here.

nagi comes back to england early and news of your split is quick. 

a few months later, rumours of him taking an offer from a team in spain circulates and your heart hurts again because even if this is how you split up, you wish you could still hear his voice after he wins a game—telling you he's tired, telling you he wishes he could just go home to you.

but nagi doesn't know what to do with himself after every win anymore. when his teammates invite him for a celebratory drink, he comes only because he isn't sure he can handle the frustration of knowing he can't call you, or that you won't pick up even if he did.

he has a few months left with manshine before he could sign a new contract. the frustration never ends though; every moment slipping by him, the ring he keeps on a chain around his neck is a weight heavy with your absence.

he thought that this is what he wanted, that being far from you never really mattered, that it's okay if he couldn't feel you against him anymore, couldn't kiss you like he's telling you he loves you without the words.

he wonders if you felt like this the whole time he's been away for years.

it's a pain that he figures he never wants to feel anymore.

so when the year ends, nagi finds himself at your front door instead of spain.

your door opens and there you are, pretty as ever, eyes bright with a kind of carefree edge to them. but you're pretty, even with the shock painting your face that he'd usually tease you for.

it's all he could think of, that you're so pretty and so, so close to him again and there's so much he wants to say with no idea how to say them.

"nagi… what are you…?"

"i missed you," is the first thing he says. they're words enough to make your lips quiver and eyes sting. "and i'm sorry, i left thinking i'll be fine even if i loved you."

he speaks while he's trying to etch into memory the way you say his name again, so clearly, so softly. you miss him a lot too, you want him back without question, but you think you can't just take him back to let him leave again.

"but you're supposed to be in spain—" you mumble, confused. he's shaking his head before you could finish, a pout settled on his lips.

"i don't want to be there, though. i want to stay here with you, if you let me again..."

"i don't understand, what about soccer?"

"doesn't matter anymore, i could just join the japan u-20. they'll let me do that, right? but everything else is a pain if you're not there." he sounds so sure of himself, like he thought about it everyday since you were gone from him.

it's difficult to process because you've wanted this for so long, to finally have him back to you. it takes you so long that he gets nervous, because what if you don't want him anymore?

he shifts his gaze, suddenly flustered but all the more certain, "i love you, y/n. i'll prove it to you if i have to."

to be honest, nagi isn't sure what he would've done if you didn't want him anymore. perhaps he could've tried his best to win you back, even if it took him too much effort. he'd do it only because nothing truly makes him as happy as he is with you. nothing is that much troubling or that much boring as long as he had you.

it's just you he needs, really.

luckily for him, he doesn't really have to dwell on it—because your warmth engulfs him, your arms around his body.

and he says, finally, "i'm home, y/n."

[grasshopperdoingdogpaddle]

U think everyone but Omi remembers all of other timeline do the monks remember good Chase as their teacher but also as Omi's dad, Fung remember watching Chase raise Omi... do u think post season final they'd treat chase different?

I think everyone's memories are left varying degrees of very fuzzy from the time stuff, and it gets fuzzier very quickly. Like waking from a vivid dream and then having difficulty remembering the details after a few moments back in consciousness.

I like the way @gravity-what described it here.

They'll occasionally have little flashes of memory from the other timeline triggered in certain events, but otherwise, the life they're living now is the life they mostly remember.

Did what happen... Really just happen?

(Though the Heylin Memory Recall spell shows that memory magic exists, so if they wanted to dredge up those hazy memories again, they probably could find a way)

More than their memories, I'd say their emotions were probably thrown out of whack somewhat, too.

They'd feel around Chase, after experiencing a world where he really was a Xiaolin monk alongside them. They lived a whole life where he was an ally to them. Where he was their rock after they lost Master Fung, where he helped them rebuild a home after they lost the temple to Hannibal and Wuya.

That little wave when he returns and the bow to Master Fung's memorial.

But Chase himself hasn't changed sides in this timeline, so if there's any hesitation from the monks that he picks up on from any lingering feelings, Chase will be happy to take advantage of it.

This is the man who responded to a point-blank question about whether there was any goodness left in him by happily burning a village to prove a point and commenting "Hm... Nope, don't think so." And also the man who emptily pretended to be good for however long he was teaching Jermaine. Chase doesn't regret joining Heylin, and he still won't miss being in the Xiaolin temple, even if he has bits of memory.

If the memories linger strong enough for any of them to feel complicated about it, Chase would readily implement the exact mannerisms or words to make them pull a punch or hesitate or be thrown off. Any different treatment or feelings the monks have towards Chase are going to net Chase some wins and end up inadvertently ceding ground to him.

And like gravity-what mentioned in that ask, even his final words where he asked Omi to promise to never give up on trying to reach Chase in the future just as fervently as he tried to reach him in the past, are likely to be something Chase will use to his advantage. Omi ends the season feeling even closer to Chase, an even deeper connection, and now he has this vow to never stop trying for him. Their bond is inseverable by fate itself now, let alone anyone's words. And "the more time Omi spends with him the more time he has to convince Omi back to the Heylin side."

Raimundo would probably the the first to be able to shake off the complications and face Chase as he is again. Or at the very least, let his hatred of Chase fuel him past any conflictions so he's not thrown off his game as a crucial moment.

I can even imagine his little thing with Guan coming into play, and Guan having a talk with Rai or with all the monks about how, he knows how they feel, but you can't dwell in things that aren't real, whether they once were or not, and that Guan thinks they should learn to steel their hearts and lock away memories and emotions that aren't serving them or are getting in their way.

So paradoxically, if the monks are feeling conflicted from their lingering memories and feelings from the other timeline, I could see that scenario as leading them to get closer to Guan in the long run. Guan himself would never allude to having any memories of the other timeline whether he did or not, and Guan's only going to open up a limited amount when it comes to others again.

But he is the only other person they can relate to in this feeling of missing a Chase that Chase threw away. Help them with seeing someone for who he is and not who he pretends to be.

[system-comforts]

hello! bit of an unusual Am I Plural ask here

i have aphantasia, which if u don’t know is basically the inability to form visualizations of things in ur head. my specific brand also extends to a lack of an internal monologue, so i’ve never really heard “my voice” unless i rlly focus on having worded thoughts, and even then theres no audio to attribute to it

i’ve been sort of wondering because according to some people i’m close to who are part of a system, i've been describing my experience in a distinctively plural way. the most recent of these was that i don’t feel like a person, specifically, but rather like i’m just a bunch of people invented to please others, without a real ability to find myself within these… lets call them personas

my questions really started when i was suddenly snapped out of a limbo upon realizing that the two people starring in a dream were not me. in fact, all though i cant recall the dream very well, as soon as o realized they weren’t me, i figured out that i didn’t recognize them at all—which is rare, for me. in the occasional times i do dream, i always experience the dream from my pov.

theres been little things i lose memory of within minutes that i look back upon and do not recall. i have had strange shifts in personality that you can sort of notice just through scrolling through my dms (say—logical one moment, to silly and childish the next)

part of me wonders if i am plural, and i think theres enough there to distinctly consider it, yet my aphantasia means i cannot really speak to the others that potentially reside in my head to confirm of deny their existence

if you would be willing to give me (us?) your thoughts, it would be very appreciated :)

Hey there anon. Thank you for the ask. I'll try to give my best advice and insight.

I think from what you've said, if you believe you may be plural, looking into it, along with different ways people present as plural, and other possibilities as well.

Some of how you describe yourself does reflect a plural experience. It also reflects a lot of questioning identity, which is common for a lot of people, especially in our current day and age. Plurality is a spectrum. So I would be curious how distinct you feel these personas are? Do you have some sense of self, even if those feelings or thoughts are a bit conflicting sometimes? Do these personas come around in specific situations or with specific triggers? Can you control these personas and what they do? Do they feel more like a "mask" or "cloak", or do they feel more seperate from you? In what other ways do you "not feel like a person"?

Furthermore, what sort of memory problems have you noticed? How long have you gone without remembering something? What sort of information tends to be lost: small everyday tasks, large periods, info about people or yourself?

The above is a lot of questions, but I find those more helpful to give and allow a person to reflect on their own experience.

If you want to try communicating, although you may have aphantasia, there are still ways you can communicate with these possible personas you talk about. Journaling can be good, or leaving notes around in obvious and visible places. Notes in your phone may work as well, even on private social media or notes apps. Meeting headmates in dreams is not uncommon for systems. However, other factors should be considered as well.

I hope some of this was helpful to you. We wish you the best as you ponder these questions and try to understand yourself!

-mod venus

[nonclassyparty]

if you wrote a novel i would seriously read it. your story telling/planning is novel quality i mean it.

for my thoughts on the last chapter 💐💐:

it may suck but i don’t feel too bad that her and mingi didn’t work out considering that he still obviously has some growing to do emotionally. hopefully he can achieve that and if they end up crossing paths in the future, great. if not also great, or at least she finds someone who’s right for her considering she expressed desire to be in a relationship, or even if she stays with herself bc i’m a firm believer that you can be happy without a romantic relationship.

i like the way you wrote her and yeosangs sort of reconciliation, it’s a bit more realistic bc i wouldn’t be so quick to forgive someone who’s treated me like that either, but i like how they can be around each other without feeling the need to be overly friendly and also without feeling like they’re just tolerating each other (i think the word is cordial, idk). there’s balance.

i’m not someone who expresses her emotions regularly but when her and seonghwa spoke for the first time in a while almost made me get out the tissues. this is the softest we’ve seen him act the whole story and i like how you wrote in his lego building hobby i thought it was very endearing.

as for sans ending, i don’t really feel a way about it other than it ended as perfectly as it could. when she first called him initially i was just like “girl i know we over him but why keep calling him” but i realize it was her final go at getting closure and i feel like their ending made sense. what more would they talk about in the future if they continue meeting even as friends? we saw how that turned out the first time. and at least she got something out of it (which was seonghwa)

i just love how you tied the story together at the end. if it’s ok to ask (i mean you already made it clear in the last chapter) how do you think they all end up in the further future. like who gets married, does she pursue bigger things with her art, etc.

i hope you’re proud of yourself for this story, bc it’s honestly one of the best series i’ve read here and i can’t wait for your next one bc i know it’s also gonna be great as well <3

omg woahhhhhh thank you very much!!

i genuinely have nothing to add to these little points u guys are making but i really enjoy reading them altho i will say that the seonghwa parts were hard to write. him and san being friends was something i planned from the start but i simply didn't know how to insert hwa into this chapter or if i did their meeting and reconciliation justice, it's hard to describe sibling relationships 😭

as for the question about where they'll end up in the future;

well, the one year forward where y/n has the apartment finally already means two things, first- wooyoung and yeosang live together now and second- it was the apartment she talked to mingi about in act 6 when he asked "how does ur life look like if everything goes to plan?" or something and which he asked about in the last chapter meaning that the story ended with her finally in a place where she's content with her life and it can only go up from there. she will later on start working as an illustrator for animated movies (a lot of inspiration for her art to me came from spirited away lol) and that will be her main occupation while she will do some art for herself occasionally. and she will meet someone, i imagine him being a fan of her works so he will be head over heels for her and she will finally get romanced the life out of her lol but i don't see any kids for her, i don't think she'd want to be a mother.

mingi well...he'll fall in love with someone else, get married, have kids, move out of the city and join a smaller firm somewhere bc it makes him more content and it's less pressure. hongjoong is similar to y/n in a way that the both of them are single and in a place where they want to have fun in life, they obviously keep in touch as she goes to visit him in tokyo and he sends her postcards, he's sort of a free spirit...

seonghwa will marry his current girlfriend, continue working at his father's firm but their relationship will never be good, hwa and y/n will be very close tho!

and san...well, i kinda want to say i'm keeping his ending a secret bc i'd like to write a spin-off for him some time later but if that never happens, then his life will be what he imagined it - he'll be very rich but very lonely.

wooyoung and yeosang will get married. when y/n left woo to go to the hotel, he literally called yeosang crying and said "you have to marry me bc there is no breaking up here after going through all this shit"😭

[rotshop]

help girl i just woke up and im already thinking abt mag s/o again. anyway please consider ;

[ tw body horror, some brief light gore and violence ]

[ note ; reader is SLIGHTLY described. the only thing mentioned is that they have a noticeable, identifying scar on their face

hank + mag s/o

-he knew you even before the boombox incident. he doesn't even really remember how you two first met, he just remembers that you started talking to him and then just kinda kept coming back. at first he wasn't the biggest fan of you since he was 'doing just fine on his own,' but...he admittedly was already really attached to you. they've never been much of a talker and that's especially noticeable to you at that point in time but ,,, they respond enough with signing, nodding / shaking their head, or the occasional speaking that you're able to carry some conversations pretty well.

-he doesn't really. have. a lot of people in his life. you're really his only real close friend, it's kinda hard for him to fully wrap his head around it so !! they chose not to, instead focusing more-so on whatever it was you were rambling to them about that day.

-not super sure of where to put this lmao but ummm ehe . he's actually surprisingly touchy with you????? like. you've hung out at his house a few times and he just like. you'll start out sitting next to each other and you'll end up either laying with your head on their chest or vice versa . its . a little funny . you tease him about it a little and he just flicks your shoulder. also traces your scar a lot if you'll let them, they're not entirely sure why they do it, they just . like asking you about it occasionally.

-also you have scary dog privileges. they might look like any other grunt at that point but they're still tall as fuck and idk man !! something abt getting a blank stare from someone who towers over u would probably make u shut up and mind ur own damn business.

-again, he's not super good at fully recognizing / acknowledging certain thoughts and feelings of his but . yknow. he can definitely tell he at least worries about you a lot more than he would some other grunt he just met. he can definitely tell there's a reason he doesn't mind you touching him, whether by grabbing his hand to go show him something or just placing a hand on his shoulder or arm (most likely arm, again. hes tall. ). they can definitely tell there's a reason that they find themself genuinely enjoying your interactions.

-after the park thing you don't see them for a long time. everytime you try and call him the lines dead, everytime you try and ask others about him you just get choice words, all in all you're pretty much lost on the entire thing. sure, you know what happened but . it just never sits right with you. it doesn't help whenever people ask questions about them or give you wary looks because of your association, half steps back when you take one forward.

-anyway. yeah nevada goes to shit and you get magnified for the aahw. by now you just. don't really talk about hank. surprisingly, you have a little more of your old memories than the average mag !! congrats. problem is they're all foggy enough that you only really distantly decipher them. lmao. you aren't super high on the ladder but you're a pretty tough mag to beat. you're well known enough that other mags tend to hang around you when there's not much else going on. v2 mags especially think it's fun to mess around with you by jumping on your back or otherwise clinging onto you . idk man u've got like . a little family here .

-at one point or another there's an outing youre on that ends up going wrong. you get split up from the rest of your unit and are forced to hide out in some old abandoned building while you wait for backup. you're a little too injured to try and walk all the way back, a heavy gash on your side preventing you from doing too much in the moment. when you hear heavy steps on concrete you're able to give some sort of noise of relief, turning your head to look over your shoulder at whichever agent in your group had finally found you-

-you're instead met with red goggles and the end of a gun.

-any kind of relief is snatched away, you know damn well who it is by just the bit you can see in the dark alone. even standing in the shade between two windows (one of which you were sitting by, probably how they seen you in the first place- if that's the case though, it's a little weird they hadn't just shot at you through it.) you knew it was him. you're already stumblingly forcing yourself up to as much of your full height as you can manage, taking some kind of defensive position even as one of your hands ghosts over your gash. the throbbing pain of it and the feeling of blood sticking and running down your skin is enough that you can't seem to focus on the fact that he won't stop staring at your face.

-it doesn't take long before your legs seem to fail you, forcing you forward a bit as you kneel in some sort of attempt to keep upright. you're too busy hissing under your breath and screwing your eyes shut in pain as your hand covers your side to notice your company stepping forwards. you're snapped back to attention when there's a hand on your face, fingertips digging into your skin as they yank your head down a little further. you know you should be grabbing him, that you should be digging your claws into his torso and ripping him clean in half, throwing whatevers left aside and leaving. you know thats what you were told to do, what you were told they deserved anyway. yet, you aren't. instead, you're just giving some warning growl as you stare at them. you notice how the end of the gun is pointed away from you, how their touch seems to outline the mark on your face.

-"If you try and hurt me, I'll kill you." That's the only real heads up you get before he's crouching down and shoving your hand out of the way, grabbing something from his pocket to get to work on you. you don't fail to notice how little attention they're paying to you (aside from the focus on your wound, of course), that you could just rush forward and slam them into the ground if you really wanted.

-ok im skippin g ahead bc this is already way too goddamn long for hcs DEJWJCS

-anyway. it's a complicated relationship for a while. the others tend to avoid you a little but he just keeps showing up around you. they keep staring at you and just hanging around in your general area. it's not that much of an irritant if you ignore all the weird emotions and thoughts it keeps bringing to the forefront of your mind, forcing you to once again try and meddle with your memories.

-eventually he just starts walking over to you and sitting down next to you. sometimes he doesn't say anything at all, just sitting there and seeming to wait for one thing another- he never seems to find whatever that is, as he always gets up and leaves without a word at some point or another. then they start talking, its just little things at first, point-blank statements you can't say much on. sometimes they're just saying they and the other three will be gone for a bit othertimes it's some half-demand to let them look at the stitches they did on you (semi-related, he's not good at them. the stitches are pretty rough. at one point or another sanford has to redo them properly lmao)

-but then there's one particular night. they do the normal thing, come over, sit down next to you, not say a word. this time though you note how they're facing you. instead of some reminder or a demand for anything, he's pulling his ask down and asking a simple question. 'What do you remember?'

-it's a long conversation. he's talking more than he normally would by a long shot, occasionally stopping whenever his words seem to especially fail him and get stuck in his throat. you don't even really remember moving around, or even him pulling you in any way, you just know you somehow end up laying next to him with your head on his chest.

-whenever the memories do seem to click into place, it's hard. you have a lot of choice words for them yourself, months of being left alone without a word bubbling up with a vengeance, they listen to them. while some mags (such as yourself) do have the ability to speak, the san and dei don't think they've ever heard one with that much emotion in their voice. they've especially never seen a mag just break down like you do, they're both tensing up a little from their far away spot when hank's walking closer to you. instead of you lashing out or swiping at him though, you just sit there while he wraps his arms around you (as best as he can at least, it's a little difficult but he's able to get them around your neck and reach his other hand behind you well enough). you're eventually doing the same to him, though it's more so just your hands resting on their back.

-it takes a good while for proper trust to be rebuilt along with an honest, proper explanation from hank that only you're privy to. eventually though, there's enough trust that you're able to hang around him again without narrowly avoiding an argument or anything. they don't like being super affectionate or 'vulnerable' in front of the other two, so most times they prefer being in your or their room. also they're still touchy lmao, doesn't help that you're mag sized now and so they just want to hold you . its hard to explain, he's never been super affected by others heights and even when he is it's usually a negative thing for him but . for some reason . he just likes being shorter / smaller than you lol ,,,,,,,, hope you like holding them a lot bc that's what you're gonna be doing

-holy shit these are long so . i think .i am going to stop here.

[padfootastic]

hi : ) I am new to this fandom ( new as in new to start reaching out to the other fans not prongsfoot shipping-wise ). I have been a simp for them since like when I was 20? And believe me I am waaaaay older now xD and I am very happy to c other ppl love this ship because it certainly needs more attention. ❤ The potential between Sirius and James is so great that I dunno how to describe, like to me, they do absolutely anything ( and I mean that ) to have each other and not fall apart. Like, James is trying to woo lily and he keeps showing off in front of her but the moment Sirius tell him to - stop - he listens and obeys, no questions asked xD it is kinda funny in this sense tbh, like Sirius has him and his huge ego on the leash ( although he is not better than James in that matter anyway) . Tbh though, I think that James would do anything to have Sirius's attention on him, even if it means by him stop showing off and Sirius scolding him ( softly of course ) like, most ppl always HC that Sirius is a dramatic attention seeker but I think it more applies to James. Also, for some reason I always thought that James has a more darker side than Sirius. Everyone going all about the Black family madness but true as it may be, to me James has the same dark side ( maybe even more ) although it's not running in the family like Blacks. It is more like a deep bitter cesspool of savage feelings for him cause he is very sentimental when it comes to Sirius and down right obsessive and possessive. I get it that most of the fandom think other way but I guess I have a soft spot for a lovelorn James who cannot let Sirius walk away/move on/ even take single step further without him, despite the fact that he himself flirts with lily. Like, he has been spoiled and pampered all his life, so whatever he wants he should get and that's that ( in his opinion) .

ahhhh welcome to this side, anon!!! (the fandom, not the shipping :p) i’m always so giddy whenever a j/s fan sends an ask bc !!! more for our numbers!!!

i’m totally w you on the ‘james would do absolutely anything for sirius’ train. that scene literally lives rent free in my head bc it’s so fkn antithetical to what arrogant teenage boys are like i’m just,,,,, like. anyone who’s tried saying no to one would understand how difficult it is—they’re brimming w defensiveness and bravado and a need to be contrary no matter what. the fact that james just,,,listened? to sirius? just like that? it tells me A. it’s not the first time. the lack of hesitation shows he’s used to and not bitter about occasionally following sirius’ lead and B. there’s absolutely zero defensiveness or bitterness. he’s not showing off or acting like he’s mightier than he is. and that’s so precious. because it shows his level of comfort with sirius? how he’s willing to give up on all pretences and doesn’t even care. (i kinda hc james as someone who’s concerned with his image? not in a self absorbed sense but more of a golden child way where they like to be in good graces at all times)

also okay that’s so interesting bc i’ve never seen anything like that before. i’ve definitely seen a similar characterisation of sirius who’s possessive and wants james at all times (he hexed lily bald in it lmao) and he’s toeing the line of morality but to have it flipped onto james? 👀 definitely needs some cognitive restructuring on my part but i don’t hate it, hey. the bit about him being a pampered little fuck who expects everything he wants to be his is definitely the part that convinces me. you can have these little instances of like, james being an absolute asshole to people because they’re trying to get sirius’ attention (which, ofc, they won’t get bc they’re not james) or he deliberately sabotages others’ attempts at asking s out on a date. it’s a toxic, codependent, unhealthy dynamic bc u just know both of them will be as intensely passionate about the other and i absolutely adore it.

is there anything better than a ‘i’ll burn the world down for you’ relationship tho?

[dameronology]

rescuer {din djarin}

summary: din djarin rescued you - and then you rescued him {for @drinksomecoco !! i hope u enjoy}

warnings: brief mentions of torture, swearing

this is like....4k words?? it got a little out of hand, i won't lie to u.

- jazz xx

It wasn’t often that The Mandalorian found himself becoming attached to bounties.

Twice. He’d done it twice.

The first time, he swore to himself that it would be the last. Adopting his little green surrogate...frog? Son?

Okay, adopting his little green surrogate Grogu had brought enough tension into his life. It had gotten him back onto the radars of both the Empire and the New Republic; thrown him into some weird form of fatherhood that he wasn’t quite ready for and tipped his entire way of life upside down. Despite all that, he never stopped to question if all the exhaustion was more trouble than it was worth, because he loved his kid. Completely and entirely in ways that no parenting book or fairytale could ever quite describe. It was an intense form of love and attachment - and Din knew it was going to hurt when he would eventually have to return the Child to his own people. That was a little far off though, because he couldn’t investigate any further til he had the means to do so. Money and resources weren’t limitless and even The Mandalorian had to find means to an end.

Going back to the Bounty Hunter’s Guild wasn’t ideal, especially not with the kid in tow - but did he have any other way? Din didn’t know any other way of life, let alone another way of earning money. Besides, he figured it would only be a quick few months. A couple jobs here and there until he had enough in savings to travel far enough to find where Grogu really came from.

But it was two bounties; two bounties that he would find himself becoming attached to. Grogu was the only one.

It was through that decision to return to the Guild that Din Djarin would find himself stumbling across the next one. He was offered five pucks - the first four were easy. Standard jobs, really. Runaway criminals and Imps who had crossed people so many times that trying to work out their loyalty was head-ache inducing. He found them all in a matter of days, really. They were good at hiding but it didn’t count for much when The Mandalorian was good at finding.

Then there was you; the fifth puck. The one he thought was going to be the easiest.

Finding you wasn’t a problem. Tucked away in a corner of rural Tatooine - maybe twenty, twenty five minutes shy of Mos Eisley - you were hiding in plain sight. It would have been enough to protect you from anyone else but Din was an unrelenting expert in finding those who didn’t want to be found.

He never quite knew what to expect when he closed in on a bounty. Sometimes they ran and sometimes they hid. A few of them had tried to appeal to his humanity; to try and connect with the man they hoped was behind the mask. Because aside from the husky voice that occasionally escaped the helmet, there was no proof that The Mandalorian was anything other than a very convincing droid. That was, until, someone would lay a hand on his son or ship and suddenly, a wave of pure human rage would burst out from beneath the beskar.

You couldn’t have hidden from him or run away, even if you wanted to. Not because you were scared, but because you were chained up; wrists and ankles in shackles, keeping you tied to the walls of a filthy docking bay. From the sand piled around your feet, it was clear that you had tried to kick up a fuss at some point.

But based on the way that you looked at him - with tired eyes and a hopeless expression - that made Din realise: you’d lost the will to fight. He knew that you weren’t going to wriggle away or try to engage in combat.

“Are you…” The Mandalorian trailed off. “Are you alone?”

“Probably,” your eyes flicked up from the ground, unknowingly capturing his gaze. “I think I’ve been left for dead.”

He sighed. “I’m looking for a...Kan Durant. Is he here?”

“No,” you shot back. “He left me here for dead about a week ago. Probably knew that a bounty hunter was going to come after him at some point.”

“Do you know where he went?”

“I’m chained up,” you said. “Isn’t the answer to your question a little axiomatic?”

“Maybe,” he replied. “But if you know anything, it might be helpful.”

“Try Corellia,” you muttered.

Corellia. That was...doable. Not too far and not too hard to search. That would be his fifth and final puck and then Din could set off for the sunset in search of his kid’s home planet. That’s what this whole thing had been about.

But...you. You’d been left for dead - and based on the bruises around your eyes and on your limbs, that was the least of what you’d gone through recently. What kind of man would it make him if he left you? A fucking awful one, obviously, but what was he supposed to do?

Din slowly leant down, pulling a thin tool from his belt. He fiddled around with your cuffs for a moment, until there was a low hiss. They fell from your hands and onto the sandy ground - he expected you to get up, or to run, or do anything but sit there and stare at him with gaunt eyes. Maybe it was foolish of him to think that merely freeing you of your restraints was doing his part for the greater good.

“Is there anywhere around here where you can go?” he asked. “An inn? A cantina?”

You snorted. “No. I’ll die.”

“You can get food and medicine out there.”

“Mos Eisley is swarming with Durant’s men,” you explained. “The minute I step foot in any town or port here, they’ll know.”

Maybe being with Grogu had softened him, or maybe The Mandalorian genuinely couldn’t find it himself to leave you. But, he found himself doing the unthinkable: sticking his hand out to you, lifting you up, and leading you out of the docking bay and back towards his ship. He didn’t know what he was going to do or how he was going to do it but really, he hadn’t thought that far ahead. His main focus had been on keeping you alive until you were within the safety of the Crest.

You stumbled slightly when he put you down, tripping and falling towards the control panel to shut the loading bay doors. At least you were intuitive.

With that, you fell back to the ground. It was becoming clearer and clearer that you were in a bit of a state - how long did you say it had been? A week since Durant had left - so that was at least seven days without proper food or water. It was a miracle you were alive. Din had got there just in time.

“Why are you helping me?” you asked. “What do you want?”

He glanced over in your direction. “I don’t want anything.”

“I don’t believe that for a second,” you shot back.

“I wasn’t going to leave you there,” Din replied. He paused for a moment, before turning to face you. “I’ve heard Durant’s name before. I know what he does to people.”

“Aren’t you more worried about finding him and getting the bounty?” you pushed.

Truth be told, Din wasn’t that bothered. He had enough money from the last four pucks to get him where he needed to be. The fifth had just been a little extra, so he had an easier time letting go of it. He certainly wasn’t the only hunter going after Durant’s ass and worst case scenario, Karga would give him a little bit of shit for not completing the job. All of that was a lot more manageable than living with the guilt of leaving you in the dark to die.

“Someone else will get him. I’m sure.” Din muttered. He reached for a ration pack stored away on a shelf and tossed it in your direction. “You should eat this. I’ll get us in the air and find some bacta-”

“- you really don’t need to,” you cut him off.

“Eat,” he pushed again. “You’re weak. You’ll need it.”

--

Over the next few days, you would come to find that forceful-but-caring demands were The Mandalorian’s main language.

He didn’t talk much - or at all really. He didn’t need to, not when you kept to yourself on the lower deck of the ship whilst he dealt with everything else. He didn’t seem to mind that you weren’t helping; after all, you’d been in a weak state when Din had found you and standing up had been hard, let alone maneuvering around the flying hunk of metal. You were beginning to feel a little more spry, thanks to the food, water and bactaspray. The combination was hardly an elixir of life but you’d found yourself feeling a little more human.

Sleep was the hard one. A combination of confusion - at the situation, at Din, at where you were going - and nightmares made it hard. Every time you closed your eyes, you found yourself hurtling back in time to when Durant had first captured you. You’d been a test dummy for all his weapons and experiments and really, you were just lucky to be alive and in one piece. It didn’t count for much though, not when you couldn’t get a single fucking second of shut eye.

You would have been a fool to think that Din hadn’t picked up on it.

He was observational by nature and even more so by craft. A man who was constantly looking over his shoulder and straight ahead; a warrior who had been raised to keep a weapon by his side at all times. Of course he was going to notice your insomnia, and the way your eyes seemed even more sunken and dull than when he’d first found you.

You were sitting in the hull when he approached you. Not a lot had been said, other than the occasional eat this or put this on your bruises. Again - all a little forceful, but with a sense of genuinity behind the words. You still had a hard time believing that he was legitimately just a man who wanted to help you.

“I find that noise helps.”

You glanced up at him. “I’m sorry?”

He cleared his throat. “When I can’t sleep, and when I have nightmares, I find that being in a room with white noise helps distract my brain.”

“Oh, right,” you gave him a small nod. “I s’pose it is pretty quiet down here.”

“It’s noisier up there in the cockpit,” he replied. “We’re going to be in hyperspace for a while so if you want to get some sleep, I’ll stay down here.”

“Thank you.”

For the first time in days, you finally showed a glimmer of emotion. It was just a smile - and one he figured was a forced one - but still, it was a good sign.

Din’s eyes followed you as you stood up, heading for the ladder up to the cockpit. You stopped in front of it for a moment, palms wrapping around one of the rungs. At first, he thought you were just pondering, or taking a moment to rethink your actions, but then a light bulb went off in his head. You were too weak.

Moving slowly, The Mandalorian positioned himself behind you.

“Is it okay if I put them here?” he quietly asked, large, gloved hands hovering over the side of your hips.

“Uh, yeah,” you replied. “Thank you.”

With Din’s support, you were able to grab onto the hatch above and pull yourself up, boots hitting the ground of the cockpit. He followed you up, guiding you over to one of the pilot’s chairs. The lights of hyperspace were flashing by, illuminating the entire room in a white-gold glow. It felt odd to be up here after so many days of confining yourself just to the hull - forbidden, even with the invite from The Mandalorian himself.

“How did you know that I get nightmares?” you asked, turning around to face him.

The helmet tilted slightly. “I get them too.”

“I’m sorry,” you softly sighed. “Thank you again for your help.”

“It’s okay,” Din brushed it off as though it were nothing. “We have about four hours til our next stop. I’ll wake you up before we get there.”

“Is that where I get off?” you asked.

“No,” he firmly replied. “It’s not safe there either.”

You had more questions that you wanted to ask - now more than ever that he was finally talking - but you were far too exhausted to even try. Once you’d fallen back against the chair and been handed a blanket out of nowhere, the noise of the surrounding machines practically dragged you out of consciousness.

---

One question you had wanted to ask Din had been about the duration of your stay.

How long were you supposed to stay on board? How long did he want you there?

You were almost scared to ask, for fear of the answer. After all, you barely knew him. He could get up at any moment and demand that you left, and you wouldn’t have been able to argue. All of this - this looking after you, this roof over your head, this care - felt too good to be true. Like it was all part of some elaborate ruse.

But it was funny, because you were even more scared that it wasn’t. If Din - or The Mandalorian, as you knew him - was truly just a nice person with pure intentions, then that was about to be dangerous territory for you. The minute that you started trusting him, and the minute you started to see him as someone who could protect you, would spell trouble. You had never intended to become attached, but it was only natural. You hadn’t had a single person look out for you - not once in your life.

Every time he made you food, or helped you up into the cockpit, you felt yourself slipping that way. A six-foot pile of beskar should not have been a sign of comfort, but the helmet came to symbolise...something. You didn’t know what. Attachment, maybe? A little inkling of affection for whoever the hell was below those inches of steel?

A few weeks passed and the tension slowly began to falter. It was probably the proximity more than anything, but the time proved to you more than anything that Din was genuine. He was helping you because he wanted to - there was no personal gain for him, nor monetary. He actually, honestly just wanted to do good.

And doing good, he was. Whilst he still kept his distance, he looked after you. He made sure that you ate enough to recover from your periods of deprivation and once a day, he would clear out of the cockpit for you to get some rest. He still helped you up the ladder every time -and even when you told him you were strong enough, he still stood back and watched just to make sure.

Because, truthfully, The Mandalorian was beginning to see something in you. He couldn’t quite put his finger on what, but he was intrigued by the way you were slowly beginning to show him parts of yourself. Where your eyes had once been gaunt and lifeless, they now had a spark in them. You were quiet when you’d met, but now you spoke to the kid and you hummed to yourself. It was like the life that was sucked out of you was slowly being breathed back in, day by day and bit by bit.

“Do you wanna get some sleep?” Din asked you one day.

“Yeah, sure,” you glanced up at the Child, giving him a small smile. “When did you last sleep, Mando?”

Another helmet tilt. “I get enough sleep.”

“I don’t believe you,” you thinned your eyes at him.

The Mandalorian sighed slightly - normally, that would have been a sign to literally anyone else to drop it. But with you? Nope. You saw that as a sign of progress; that the little, tiny display of emotion meant you were beginning to chip past those godforsaken layers of beskar.

“I get nightmares about Durant,” you continued. “Every time I panic and wake up in a cold sweat, I remind myself that I’m safe, because I know that you and the kid are here.”

“You do?”

“Yeah,” you admitted. “You can tell me anything and I promise I won’t judge you. You’ve never judged me.”

He pondered for a moment, before releasing another deep breath. “I can’t sleep alone.”

“Really?”

“Last time I did, I woke up and my parents were gone,” Din explained. “So I wait til the kid wants to go to sleep and I just go with him, so that I’m not alone.”

Your heart dropped a little at that - partially because he’d opened up to you, but also because the Child rarely ever slept. If Din only ever waited around for their exhaustion to coincide, it must have been months since he’d last got a decent night’s rest. It was the least he deserved.

Nodding, you stuck your hand out towards him. “C’mon.”

“What?”

“I’m gonna sleep and so are you,” you replied. “You need it and if I’ve done everything that you’ve instructed so far, I think I should have the same in return.”

--

Din didn’t want to admit it to himself at first.

It being multiple things: the fact you were helping him, the fact your presence on his ship had made the place seem better, the fact that his heart skipped a beat every time you brushed past him.

Bar his surrogate son, Din had never been close with anyone before. He’d never even slept in the same goddamn room as anyone else, even. That was a fucking mammoth step for him, but when you took his hand? It felt like a baby step. Just a tiny hop from A to B. Not a massive milestone, or a moment of personal progress. You had made it seem so simple.

Maybe that was it.

You never over-complicated anything. Your intentions were always clear and simple - there was no moral ambiguity, no moments where Din had to question whether or not he could well and truly trust you. He just knew. It was funny, because it was the exact same situation you’d had with him - questioning why he was helping you, trying to work out what he wanted. This whole time, Din had been helping you solely because he thought it was the right thing and it’s what you were doing for him too.

Din liked when you sat close to him. There was a little wave of warmth he felt every time you shuffled a bit nearer to him when you both crashed on the floor of the cockpit, and a tiny swarm of butterflies that flew through him when you stuck by his side in busy towns and cities. It was clear that you found comfort in him after so many years of going without it.

In turn, he found comfort in you. Not just in the way you unintentionally looked after him, but just...everything. Your presence had been a little odd on the Crest at first, but now it felt weird to be without it. Hearing you single quietly in the shower and have one-sided conversations with the Child filled a hole in his life that he hadn’t even realised had been there.

It was as though he’d had a missing puzzle piece his entire life; a gap between all the interconnected parts that hadn’t been integral, but certainly inconvenient. And now that it was filled, he could take a step back and finally look at the bigger picture that had been forming. All the pieces were finally there - you and the kid and whatever odd family unit that made you - and the galaxy didn’t seem so nonsensical anymore.

A little over two months after he first found you, word got around that Durant had finally been captured. Not by Din, but that hadn’t mattered - because killing the man who had hurt you, even after everything, would never amount to everything he’d done for you.

The relief didn’t last long for you, though - because as soon as you realised you no longer had a reason to hide, it dawned on you that you no longer had a reason to stay with Din. Or, at least not one you were willing to share with Din. Begging to let you stay just for the sake of being near him didn’t seem like a very convincing argument - at least not from where you were standing.

But from where Din was standing, it was a little different. You were part of his life now, even if you had no idea. That wasn’t your fault, though. He wasn’t exactly the best at vocalising it. Admitting it to himself had been hard enough, let alone to you.

“So,” you spoke softly, clearing your throat. “I suppose you’ll drop me off at the next planet?”

You were both sitting in the cock-pit; the Child was asleep downstairs and the Crest was soaring through the last stretch of hyperspace before Nevarro.

Din didn’t want to drop you off. He didn’t want his ship to be silent all over again or to sleep without you by his side. The thought alone of not having you around anymore was enough to make him a little watery-eyed beneath his beskar barrier. You’d grown on him, and in return, he’d kind of, accidentally fallen in love with you.

“You don’t have to go,” he said.

You peered over at him. “If you can think of a reason for me to stay aboard, please do let me know.”

“I want you to stay,” Din replied. He gently reached out a hand and took it in his - it was the first time that he’d given you such a vast gesture. “Isn’t that reason enough?”

“Yeah,” you smiled. “It is.”

--

Staying aboard the Razor Crest was one of the best decisions you’d ever made.

Not only because it meant you were well and truly safe, but because Din’s direct request was a sign to you that you weren’t imagining things. Whatever attachment you felt to him, he felt it too - but it ran deeper than that. There was a mutual concern and respect for one another. Something born of two lifetimes spent on their own, finally coming together in one.

Things had been a little slow before then; the way that you danced around each other, like two magnets that were meant to come together - just with a little hesitancy. There had been a lot of late nights and long trains of thought about the signals that the other was giving off; about whether you’d misinterpreted the way his hands lingered over yours, or the way you’d practically passed out on his shoulder.

But, after that - after Din had openly asked you to stay, and you’d happily agreed, things began to move a little faster. Where you’d once been slowly walking down that hill and towards each other, you were now slipping, tripping and falling.

With each passing night, you inched closer towards each other. God forbid you ever found out, but Din even found himself pushing the pilot’s chairs closer to each other when you weren’t in the room, just so he could properly feel you next to him when you dozed off. He enjoyed your presence at the best of times but it was those dark, quiet moments when he genuinely and fully needed you.

It came to a head one night when you’d laid down with the Child beside you - not upstairs in the cockpit, but in the tiny cot in the hull of the ship.

There wasn’t room for one person, let alone one person and a tiny creature. Even worse, for two people - one in a beskar suit - and the creature. It just didn’t work. It shouldn’t have worked.

But where there’s a will, there’s a way, and the moment that Din saw you dead to the world with the Child in your arms, he was certain that he was going to make it work. Maybe with a bit of reshuffling there, and if he just moved the kid here - and that was when Grogu bit him pretty hard on the finger.

Disregarding his reshuffling plan, he knew there was only one option left.

It was something he’d never dreamt of doing before, simply for how terrifying and exposing it was - but he took one glance at you, and once glance at his kid, and he knew it was going to be worth it in the long run. It was merely a necessary step to getting closer to you - physically, mentally emotionally.

You stirred slightly at the sound of metal clattering to the floor - not enough to wake up, but enough to be a little more aware of the room around you. A moment later, there was a quiet hiss, and then everything went black.

In your sleepy state, your brain reacted a little slowly - but then the mattress beneath you dipped, and you felt someone’s skin against yours. Not just skin, but stubble against the back of your head as he pressed a kiss to it, and warm fingers tangling with yours.

“The armour,” you murmured. “You took it off.”

“It was the only way,” he softly replied. “It’s okay. Go back to sleep.”

“Okay,” you let out a sleepy hum. “Good night…”

“Din,” he quietly said.

“Good night, Din.”

[pffbts]

↬genre: slice of life ; fluff ; comfort ; angst ; hint of soft romance!

↬characters: kim mingyu x reader | cameo: choi seungcheol

↬w.c: 1.5K

↬author`s note: tonight we`re back with mingyu. his one came from a very close personal spot in my heart. happy reading!! i love u all very much :)

↬synopsis: there are 13 boys who lives in your town where each of them have each of their own colors. some you know in person & some from afar so one day you sat down deciding to describe each of their colors absorbing all of their goodness and all of their flaws. you wondered what if someone in some other town ever thought of questioning when they looked at these boys, that―what if we lived in the same town?

☍ seungcheol | jeonghan | joshua | junhui | soonyoung | wonwoo | jihoon | seokmin | mingyu | minghao | seungkwan | vernon | chan

[15:45 PM] [some days you wondered if he could touch the sky, literally.]

―while the basketball court reminded the people of the town of him, for you it was the smell of home cooked meals that would defeat every restaurant`s delicacy.

it wasn`t like you never appreciated his sport skills or his math skills but most days you were just simply envious how easy mingyu makes things look like whenever he`s in the kitchen doing whatever he does.

your mother might have always nagged you saying how you will never be able to do half of the things that he does and she might be also the reason you hate him half-heartedly but at the same time you couldn`t help but admire his strong back when he cooks while you just join your and his mother at the dinner table.

every two or three months, both of your mothers who were friends since their own younger days would join at each one`s place during weekends to have some calm and quiet dinner with some occasional reminiscing of their old days while mingyu every time would secretly take an extra piece of chicken to place it on your plate.

and when your eyes will shoot up to meet with his own, you`ll catch him mouthing a, “eat up well.” with a small smile that reaches his eyes.

maybe he`s trying to make up for every time he never intentionally made you feel bad about yourself through your mother. he knew how she always compared you with him. that`s why during such weekends like giving some extra piece of meat or giving you a spoonful of broth when you`re standing next to him watching him cook, he would give some extra attentions to you without both of your mothers` knowledge so that when you walk back home, even if your mother picks another bone with you, you`ll always know that mingyu just simply loves cooking and caring for people he loves. he never does it out of a place where he wants to showcase.

most of your friends and people around you didn`t have much of the knowledge of the kind of relationship you had with mingyu because meeting him would be so random that you would be most of the time taken aback.

one of those days was that one night when you were walking back to your home from having a study session with your best friend at her place and you heard a familiar laughter from the other side of the road behind you.

looking over your shoulder, you saw none other than mingyu along with one of his closest buddy seungcheol, walking side by side and laughing to some things you didn`t quite hear.

you had your hood up over head so it was easy to hide by without grabbing his attention but before you could turn your head away and look straight ahead, mingyu, within that split second caught you with his eyes. you thought whether it was his inhumane speed in catching people with his eyes or his heartstrings vibrating with the sensation that one of his loved ones is close by and he needed to quickly find them in any way possible.

but what made you taken aback by all this and suddenly look straight ahead and just walk faster while pretending as if you never saw him didn`t ever cross your mind. you wonder what made you so nervous, it wasn`t like he was going to jump on you or something.

as you continued walking faster towards your home, mingyu called you out by your name in his softest voice and bid his friend a goodbye along with a, ‘i`ll see you tomorrow, man!’

everything happened within some few seconds―mingyu crossed the streets jogging, caught up to you and put his strong, protective arm around your shoulder hanging his palm politely in front of your chest without letting it touch you anyway while at the same time pulling you a little closer to his chest.

he had no business giving you this sudden free envelope of warmth during this cold night for no reason but you let him do what he wanted to do as long he`s just being that one good old friend of yours for a lifetime with whom you shared a single childhood polaroid picture sitting in each of your study desks.

but before you could say that it was completely unnecessary for him to walk with you by abandoning what seemed like a very interesting conversation with seungcheol some while ago, mingyu, in his very casual tone stated, ‘here, let me walk you home.’

and walk you home is what he did that night. he even stayed back to see you switching on the lights in your room and waved you a silent goodbye when you opened the window of your room to let the air pass inside. he had this dreamy look where his eyes looked like it was slightly wet and his soft bangs did their little dance on his forehead.

till to this day, you always wondered why he did that. was it out of selflessness that runs in him or was he really delighted to see you that night and decided to walk you back home as an excuse to spend some time with you?

till to this day, you`ve not figured this out but that night became one of those nights which never came back again into your life yet.

although there would be some instances where he would walk you back home when it would be dinner nights during both of your mothers` weekend days but your mother would always be there with you so things were always different.

so that was just one night when both of you were alone and the night air only acted as the background score by flowing through the trees and fluttering the leaves giving some escape to the silence that prevailed in-between both of you.

in-between some of these countable memorable incidents, both of you had some good share of eye contacts and nodding of heads when you would see him from the bleachers of the basketball court while he`s playing a game.

but that was it.

like it was said, your relationship with him was borderline formal. there wasn`t much intimacy and not much words were exchanged in-between both of you. at the end of the day, you were unsure how you would want him in your life because knowing mingyu gives you all sorts of options and conflicts at the same time.

if you gave him a little bit of a chance he would have accepted himself in any position in your life but you decided that you really didn`t have anything to give him back. his selflessness, his way of winning people`s heart without even trying, his familiarity and yet his charismatic way of putting people in a good mood was something you can never give him back.

the little you inside your head didn`t know how to perceive mingyu and you, yourself knew that you would never get to be alone with him like that night ever again so it`s better that you kept him at the friendship pedestal considering that has been the easiest lock to open all the time.

but you wished for that one person, who`d get to have him in his life from another town or this town to give their relationship with him a proper name and not be so conflicted with relationships in real life and where people stand in their life like yourself because you were definitely not something mingyu should be having in his life.

and it didn`t matter what he thought. because even if he thought something otherwise, you would still choose the easiest lock to open.

fin.

[cupidhaos]

playgrounds and first kisses

pairing: cha eunwoo x reader

word count: 2.3k

genre: fluff, slice of life, first kisses, childhood friends

summary: we go back to the time that eunwoo realizes his feelings for y/n go beyond platonic

warnings: none

a/n: it has came to my realizations that you could probably read these little fics without having to read my series and honestly if you think these are cute and like them you’re most likely gonna get ur heartbroken if u read the series LMAO also kudos to those who remember the original title :P

[part of my What is Love? series]

eunwoo was thirteen at the time that he had moved into mingyu and y/n’s neighborhood - his house right up the street from where the two of them had lived side by side. he came right in time as the summer quarter was just about to start up, transferring into the nearby middle school.

eunwoo’s first encounter with mingyu can be described with one word: wholesome. once eunwoo and his family had settled in, the kim’s had decided to take a visit to their neighbors to greet them. the young boy stood behind his mother as she talked to mrs.kim. mingyu stood next to his mother as he tried to get a better look at the other. his shyness got the best of him though as he inched more and more out of view.

“mingyu! don’t be rude and introduce yourself!” his mother scolded with a smack on the head. mingyu winced at the action but quickly recovered. a toothy smile spread across his face as he stuck out a hand towards the other young boy.

“i’m kim mingyu!” he greets, the atmosphere around them lightening up. eunwoo moves into frame and shyly takes his hand with a nervous smile “cha eunwoo” and right as he took his hand - mingyu began rambling on and on about this new video game that he bought and that was when eunwoo knew that they were gonna be good friends.

two weeks past after their initial greeting and the two of them got along greatly. they would both constantly be hanging out together and playing video games. occasionally inviting some of mingyu’s other friends that he had known also. it was a hot summer day where eunwoo had met the person that would captivate all thoughts in his mind for the next five years. the two middle school boys were playing video games in mingyu’s room when mrs.kim yelled for mingyu. the younger boy just waved her off as he concentrated hard on leveling up.

“mingyu! go greet y/n! they just came back from their trip!” his mom yelled from downstairs, but it seems as if mingyu was too zoned onto his game to even acknowledge what she had said. eunwoo looks up curiously from his own device at the sound of a new name “y/n? who’s y/n?”

it wasn’t until the sound of the doorbell ringing and hurried footsteps up the stairs that eunwoo would soon figure out the identity of the mystery person. the door to mingyu’s room slams open, causing both of the boys to jump in their spots. the sound indicating ‘game over’ was heard loudly on mingyu’s gameboy as he groans loudly.

the person standing at the door wore an annoyed look on their face as they carried a paper bag in their hand. they huffed angrily where they were standing and crossed their arms “you jerk! you didn’t even bothered to say hi!”

mingyu just rolls his eyes and grabs his gameboy again “i was busy. besides i didn’t want-”

he was cut off as they threw the paper bag towards mingyu’s forehead, resulting in a large ‘thunk’ noise to echo throughout the room. mingyu quickly grabs his forehead in pain, rubbing the targeted area as he tries to soothe himself. “what the hell!”

“i even got you a souvenir you ungrateful jerk!”

“what even is that!”

they stand proudly with a smile on their face and place their hands on both of their hips.  “its a volcanic rock from jeju! do you like it?”

eunwoo watches the scene lay out in front of him from where he sat on the floor by the closet door. he was pretty sure that this person was the ‘y/n’ that mingyu’s mom was talking about just moments before. he was also pretty sure she didn’t even see him in the room.

“you threw a rock at my face! you’re gonna give me a concussion!” mingyu grumbles as he still holds his forehead in pain. y/n doesn’t even acknowledge what he says as she goes to throw her arms around his neck, a smile so big on her face that eunwoo was worried it hurt.

“you missed me didn’t you! theres no need to lie gyu just admit it!” she cheerfully states and eunwoo nearly missed the blush that covered mingyu’s embarrassed face. “get off! you stink!” mingyu huffs as he shoves y/n off of him.

y/n lands on the floor - a pout on her lips as she crosses her arms. it was then that she noticed the other person in the room. the two finally make eye contact and y/n feels her face heat up. “mingyu! you never told me you had someone else over!”

the young boy just rolls his eyes at her though as he picks up his fallen gameboy. “you never gave me a chance to talk idiot! besides, you just showed up here unannounced!”

she just gives him a glare before turning back to eunwoo. she gives him a bright smile before extending out her arm just like how mingyu did when they first met. “i’m y/n! i live right next door! did you just move here?”

eunwoo nods shly in response to her question as he reached out to grab her hand. he couldn’t ignore the warm feeling he got in his stomach when their hands made contact. y/n glances down at the gameboy in his lap and gasps, moving to sit next to him.

as y/n leaned over his shoulder, asking millions of questions - eunwoo could feel his ears heat up at how close she was sitting next to him. he was also able to feel the stare he was getting from mingyu who sat on the bed, trying not to make it obvious he was looking at the two of them.

months pass by and eunwoo settles in nicely at their school. he became closer to y/n and mingyu along with making more and more friends despite his shy persona. soon enough two years passes by just like that and he was already fifteen.

now y/n wasn’t an idiot. she knew that her friends were attractive and popular, having their club full of admirers. people constantly coming up to y/n, asking if she was able to put a word or two in to one of her friends. but she had always looked past their looks and treated them normally despite so many of her other classmates putting them on such a high pedestal.

the day eunwoo knew that what he felt for y/n went beyond friendship was a day he would never forget. his girlfriend at the time had just broke up with him. he asked to meet up with her at the nearby park and told her the truth of how he really felt.

“i really do like you i do.. but i don’t know if they’re romantic”

sure he could’ve probably phrased his sentence a lot better but i mean he was fourteen. she kept urging him to kiss her but he refused - saying he didn’t feel as if he should be kissing someone that he didn’t really care for. again - could’ve phrased things a lot better.

so there he was, sitting on the swing alone after his now ex girlfriend slapped him in the face and stormed off. it was a warm day in july and the sun was slowly setting behind him. he was lost in thought, he didn’t know what romantic feelings really felt like. i mean that was his first girlfriend how was he supposed to know?  

he didn’t snap out of his thoughts until he heard someone sitting on the swing next to him. he lifts up his head slowly and meets eyes with y/n who softly smiled back at him, gently swung her legs back and forth as she sat next to him.

“whats got you all mopey? your girlfriend dump you or something?” she teases. but to her surprise eunwoo just solemnly nods and y/n feels her eyes widened. “she did. then she slapped me because i told her i wouldn’t kiss her.”

y/n stops her movements as she stares at eunwoo - her mouth agape. “what?! what happened! i thought things were going well with you two! you said you liked her!” eunwoo nods again and turns to look in front of him. “i did… she was really nice but i think she only liked me for my looks and not really for my personality. in all honesty i only went out with her because jungkook and yugyeom kept teasing me for not accepting any of my confessions”

eunwoo looks down. he wasn’t sure why but the thought of people only liking him for his looks hurt. he only accepted the confession because he kinda liked her - he thinks. he wasn’t sure how to define liking someone.

“i told her i wanted to kiss someone that was special to me. she took a lot of offense to that.” he adds on with a nervous laugh. he rubs the back of his neck and looks up to see y/n with an angry expression on her face.

“she shouldn’t be pressuring you like that! and only liking you for your looks?! thats so shallow! she should like you because of how nice and funny you are! and how cool but lame you can be. you have so many good qualities other than your face dongmin!” y/n huffs. he feels his eyes widen and watch as crosses her arms. eunwoo sits in shock for a moment before bursting out laughing.

y/n gives him a look of confusion as he covers his mouth to try and stop laughing. “did i - did i say something funny?” she asks to which eunwoo just shakes his head. “no it’s just - you’re getting so worked up on behalf of me and-”

“well that’s because i care about you!” she interrupts, causing eunwoo’s laughter to come to a halt. “i’m not just gonna let someone slap you for not liking them back and only being interested in your looks when theres so many good things about you!” and eunwoo hoped that she wasn’t able to see how red his face was right now. the shocked expression on his face slowly morphs into a soft smile though.

“thank you y/n. i honestly was thinking about kissing her though just so i could get it over with… that does seem a bit shallow of me so i wanted to tell her how i felt.” eunwoo confesses.

“are you dumb? even if it is your first kiss it shouldn’t be something forced!” she states and eunwoo nods at her statement.

“i know i know… i just… want to get my first kiss over you know? but i also want to do it with someone that i care about. i mean i just want to know what it’s like okay! i’m curious thats all.” he admits and its quiet between the two of them for awhile. the air began to feel a bit stuffy as if there were words being unspoken. it wasn’t until y/n spoke up that the silence was finally broken.

“do you really want your first kiss that bad?” she quietly asks, staring at her feet beneath her. eunwoo looks up at the question, almost not hearing her. before he can even answer - y/n takes in a deep breath before looking up to meet his eyes “kiss me then!”

eunwoo feels his heart stop at her words. his face felt as if he was burning. y/n’s face filled with embarrassment and she covered her face with her hands “or don’t! just act as if i didn’t say anything!”

“huh?” was all eunwoo could muster up. his brain stopping as he basically malfunctions.

“you said you wanted your first kiss really badly and wanted to do it with someone you cared about and i care about you and you care about me and we’re both friends and its just a kiss and-”

“okay”

“..huh?”

“okay. i’ll kiss you.”

y/n peeks through her fingers and tries to see if he was lying. slowly removing her hands from her face. she gulps and nods nervously. “okay then. but we’re just doing this as friends okay!” eunwoo nods in agreement - his heart picking up his pace. was this what it felt like to genuinely like someone?

y/n closes her eyes and eunwoo couldn’t help but be in awe at the way the sunset looked from behind her. it formed her outline perfectly and he couldn’t help but feel his hands start to sweat. no one ever making him feel this way before. he also closes his eyes and leans in from the swing that he sat on.

the kiss was short and chaste. but it still made eunwoo’s heart feel as if it would burst at that moment. was this the feeling he was looking for? was this what it felt like to be in love? he always knew that he cared for y/n, but never realized that it was the different type of care that he had for her than from the rest of his friends.

once the two of them pulled away, they both opened their eyes simultaneously. eunwoo froze from where he sat, unable to look away from her. all he knew was that this was a moment that would never leave his mind as the days go by.

y/n covers her face once again, turning to look away from him. she stands up quickly and turns back towards him with an embarrassed look on her face “if you tell anyone about this you’re dead!” she threatens running off. all eunwoo could do was nod dumbly as he tried to calm his racing heart.

it was then that he realized that he’s probably always felt this way for y/n. since the very first day that they met, he always wanted her to smile at him. the feeling that he gets when the two of them together is a feeling reserved only for her. he never thought about it before nor did he ever realized - but was this the feeling of love?

eunwoo couldn’t have asked for a more memorable first kiss.

moments of love masterlist

[gaymershigh]

Hi, can u write headcanons of Jamil, Azul, Cater, Rook and Idia discovering that their S/O (male) is their favorite singer/idol in a disguise? Sorry if it sounds too boring

Thanks and I love your blog <3333

It's not boring at all! I love this request so much 💗 the reader has to not be a different world like Yuu so it makes sense in context as to why they're popular in twisted wonderland, just to clear things up!

Also yes, I'm doing other requests before redoing that damned unfinished draft-

Jamil, Azul, Cater, Rook and Idia discovering their boyfriend is a popular idol

You want to tell him so bad but you just don't the guts to.

It's not like you don't trust Jamil or anything. It's just that Kalim's 99% always nearby him and try don't him to overhear your confession and cause a huge hassle.

But sometimes secrets are broken by itself. You can be your own secret breaker.

While you were listening to songs from the Land of Hot Sands that was recommended by Jamil, he was picking random songs from your country.

His eyes slightly widen when one of the songs he picked's singer sounds just like you but with a different name.

“He sounds just like you.” he stated and that made you panicked. That is one of your newer songs from a few weeks ago.

He got curious when your words started getting shaky and your face getting sweaty. This led him to researching your stage name, making you even more scared.

“He even looks like you too, could it be?.. ” if you kept lying, it will go into a dead end. The only thing to do it to spill the beans even if you don't want to.

Your hesitant nod was followed by silence and then a normal 'ok' from your lover like nothing was out of the ordinary. You were shocked.

In the inside however, he was different. He was baffled, these things only happen in fairytails!

He's not complaining though, he loves the feeling of being special.

Even if don't mind, he wouldn't be the type to be brag about your relationship together. Maybe with Kalim but other than that, nah.

“I see. Don't worry, ya amar, I'll keep this a secret. just the two of us only.”

How can you keep this secret away from him for that long? Colour me and him impressed.

Jamil is reasonable as to why he doesn't know about your secret identity because he doesn't keep up with the trends but Azul? He definitely spends more time on the internet than Jamil would ever.

But of course he would find out eventually. Of course, it's Azul.

You were giving him some song recommendations and avoiding your own so it wouldn't raise suspicion.

Unfortunately, you weren't fast enough as he realized you kept skipping a few songs right before the song hits the 3 second mark.

When he asked you why you kept skipping a few songs. You sweated and lied about the singer is not so good. You basically degraded yourself.

If course, it's not easy to fool your boyfriend. He snatched your phone away and looked at the current song you're about to skip.

He covered his mouth in shock. There was no doubt about it, that really is you. The voice, the looks, the stage name sounds like something you would name yourself, everything!

“Darling, why didn't you tell me? Do you not trust me?” You had to reassure him that was not the case and you just prefer not to get the attention and not make anyone annoy him about asking him questions about you.

You're just so special, aren't you? You're an idol beloved by everyone but you don't want the publicity and cause any problems, you're so sweet and precious.

He'll only brag occasionally. It's unprofessional for him to be cocky every single time of the day and he'll probably show off only to intentionally piss off someone.

“Darling, you shouldn't insult yourself! You're very good in singing and you amazingly breathtaking! So handsome.”

Seriously, how did you get away from him, Cater Diamond himself??

He's a social media God and even if he does suspects you several times, he's supposed to catch on sooner.

You have to admit, it was harder to hide away from him since he follows your account. Everytime he takes a selfie with the both of you, a lot of people comment asking him is that (stage name).

He would usually reply 'I wish lol but imagine if that happens 😳'. This makes you nervously laugh.

He always comments about how you always look like (S/N) all the time and you always nervously scratched your neck, feeling guilty.

He also joked about your voice being incredibly similar and how you could be the idol in disguise. My god you couldn't describe how much you want to run out of there as soon and possible.

You thought everything is going smoothly until the most dreadful statement came out of your boyfriend.

“(Y/N), do you want to go to (S/N)'S concert on Friday this week?” You had enough. You can't handle the torturous moments and can't keep up with the lies anymore. You have to tell him with a little twist to it. You said you were busy which means you have to keep denying your cute pouty sweetheart.

When you finally finished your concert, you called your boyfriend from the stage to go to the backstage. You can see the excitement in his eyes.

When you confessed that his statements about his number 1 favorite idol is also his boyfriend he's been dating for months, he went form speechless to hugging you tightly while screaming.

“Holy shit, I can't believe it, (Y/N)! I'm gonna tell everyone!” You sighed in relief as he reached out for his phone.

He's definitely gonna brag no matter what universe he's in. The publicity and increase amount of his followers in magicam is gonna be unbelievable. Just like Azul, he's gonna shove your relationship to everyone's face just to annoy them.

“(Y/N)-chan is so mean hiding such amazing secrets away from me, you're gonna pay the price~”

He's gonna be so surprised as to how you hide from him for more than 3 days. He's got good eyesight and very good at reading your heart.

You're sometimes we're scared that he caught on as he kept praising you like your fanbase would usually do. You never felt so relieved when you found out he's just like that.

He sometimes does comments how you look like your other side and how your voice sounds uncomfortably similar but that's just it.

It's a little bit easier to get away from him when it's about social media since he's not really the type to look to check social media daily.

He kept persistently asking you if that singer he adores so much was you, which you kept replying with of course, no.

But every single time you answered the same reply, your tone and confidence seems to be different, lowering down specifically. He probably already knew you are (S/N) now but he really wants you just give him a 'yes' instead of just believing in his own word.

While you were cuddling with him on his bed and about to fall asleep, you were playing a few songs as white noise to make you go to dreamland faster.

You didn't even realise your song was playing, your eyes were bleary and you could black out any moment.

Rook took the opportunity to asked you again if you were (S/N), he was both surprised and please when he finally got the answer he waited for.

With no hesitance, you said yes before drifting to sleep. He won this time, checkmate.

When you woke up, he told you about what happened last night with the usual smile while you're mouth was agape.

He might unintentionally brag by telling the whole campus how handsome you are, your angelic voice, how lovable and huggable your figure is, Vil is jealous.

“Mon trésor, there is no need to repent about your beauty, you are lovely in any shape of form, my sweet delicate dove~”

He adores your idol version of yourself and is probably the only real idol that he admires, the rest is probably his anime waifus or whatever.

Doesn't mean he doesn't love your backstage form too, he loves you too very much and thinks you're very handsome :)

It's just that your face reminds him of his favorite singer of all time. He's always making conspiracy theories about how you're (S/N)'s clone and you'll just laugh, knowing everything.

He once said that maybe you're an idol in secret, this made you sweat nervously as you shook it off.

Everytime he talks about your idol self to you, Ortho always asks if you're ok or not because you always felt a bit anxious and shaky as if you were about to get killed.

This made Idia raise suspicion. He wanted an answer as to why so he made up a plan.

He makes Ortho note your condition everytime he talks about (S/N).

His suspicions were right, you're always uncomfortable everytime he asks you if you're the idol version of yourself.

If he thinks he has enough tapes and audios of you literally shaking, he started negotiate you.

You had no escape as Ortho has trapped you in his room alone with your boyfriend. He kept taunting you with the same question 'are you (S/N)?' until you finally give in and told the truth.

Even though he got his victory, he still felt bad since you don't wanna talk to him for 3 days, causing him to cry like a baby.

He seriously can't believe it though, he just experienced something out of his mangas! He's beaming with joy.

He's only bragging on the internet only, there is no way he's gonna say anything in real life as you're wayyyy out of his league.

“You could have just told me, you know! I won't tell anyone if you're uncomfortable, I promise!”

You have no idea how much I loved writing this one but I got a creativity burnout when writing Idia lol~

-𝕸𝖎𝖗𝖎

[shsldepressedlesbian]

for the smut ask meme,,, maybe 74 with komahina? 😳 👉👈 (with bottom hajime bc that shits hot)

74: "Wow, I think you're blushing even redder than that vibrator inside you."

ao3

ah, yes, bottom!hajime... i was expecting and hopeful towards this HDHDHDH

please allow me to apologize for the wait 🙇‍♂️ there was one paragraph i had to write that im ashamed to say took me a good time to hype myself up to do JDJSJJS either way i hope u enjoy this!! even tho its been forever so im worried you might not get a chance to see this 😔

-

“So, it’s fine, right?”

Had he not grown used to it, Hinata would have been disturbed at the nonchalant grin on Komaeda’s face compared to his own already feeling incredibly hot at the very sight of the silicone object he held in hand.

...He really shouldn’t get flustered over this, however. Afterall, he’s already agreed and talked about this beforehand.

A simple discussion about Komaeda wishing to get a chance to use a vibrator on him. And of course, Hinata had agreed, finding it only fair with how many times he’s used one Komaeda.

And yet…

The one Komaeda holds is a simple penetrative kind, definitely new, with a noticeable red color. It certainly was far from large- but bigger then what Hinata had initially expected.

Perhaps he had just been expecting one of the small, stringed ones. Though, maybe a bigger one would be better…

As though sensing his hesitance, Komaeda falters. "Well, of course, if you changed your mind, we don't have to-"

"NO," Hinata interrupts, only to immediately bite his tongue at just how loud he had accidentally been. "No, it's fine. We've… already gotten me ready, anyhow."

Right. If he could handle Komaeda's dick and nonstop teasing, he could handle something as simple as this. Besides, he doesn't want to drag this out for too long.

Komaeda pauses for a second, before regaining his smile. "Ah, excellent, then. Could you… spread your legs for me, again, Hinata-kun?"

Another wave of embarrassment briefly hits Hinata at the request. It's not even that lewd- in fact, it should be expected- but that doesn't stop him from averting eye contact with Komaeda as he obeys, allowing his knees to fall apart and become exposed. In order to become more comfortable, he finally lays down on his back, pressing his head against the pillows below him.

He doesn't have to look at Komaeda to tell his expression, but in a way, that only gets his face to heat up again, turning his head away even more. Unfortunately, on his back, he can't bury his face in the pillows fully like he usually does.

Hinata bites his lip when he finally feels the head of the toy push against his lube-slicked entrance, but can't keep in the shaky, quiet gasp when it's being pushed further in him.

It… really is a different sensation. Completely different from the ones they had sometimes used on his outer body or, of course, Komaeda's cock.

It's cold from it's material and the coat of lube Komaeda had lathered on it, and while it doesn't hurt, it doesn't feel good yet, either.

"If it gets too much, you'll warn me, right?" His boyfriend asks, his warm voice already enough to get Hinata to calm down. Ah, he was the one who was making too much of a deal about this- of course, he could trust Komaeda. If it hurt, he'd pull it out in a second.

But instead of saying anything, Hinata merely nods, closing his eyes and instinctively holding his breath. He probably looks pathetic, like that, however, and so he brings his arms up to further cover his eyes from view.

Komaeda, at first, is incredibly gentle, like always. Pushing it in bit by bit, occasionally stopping whenever Hinata gave a noticeably rough shudder.

Still, Hinata isn't sure how much he can handle even that, considering it only seems to drag on the event, making the toy feel much longer than it actually is.

As though having read his mind, Komaeda, who also seemed to be kind of impatient, easily thrusted the rest of the toy into Hinata, all the way up to the hilt.

This doesn't go without a reaction, as at the unexpected fast pressure, Hinata let out a gasp, digging his nails into his own arms, having forgotten he didn't have them on the sheet.

There's a second of silence, as he gets used to the deep intrusion, before Komaeda gives a hesitant, "are you okay?"

Hinata once again responds with only a nod. Despite him having not expected it, it hadn't hurt, per say- but it still felt a little strange, and uncomfortable.

Or, so it did, before he distinctly felt Komaeda grab the hilt, gently dragging the toy out, and before Hinata can object, quickly pushing it back in, brushing his prostate head on.

Another cry leaves his throat, as his arms leave his face in order to properly grasp the pillow beneath him- only to catch sight of Komaeda's face, who looks as though he's finding the greatest possible joy from this, face dusted with red but focusing intently on Hinata's body, flickering from his face to see his reactions to his entrance and at his psychical reactions.

At the sheer arousement of his gaze, Hinata once again covered his face with an arm, heat and embarrassment filling his senses.

Komaeda, however, merely chuckles at this.

"Aha, sorry, was that too much?" His voice is as cheerful as usual, but it has a certain undertone to it Hinata could only describe as sultry. "I just wanted to make sure I memorised all those spots correctly. Afterall, with these kinds of things, you sort of need to do the whole 'back and forth' to get the most pleasure. At least, that's how it is for me."

Hinata can't get any words out of his throat, and so he once again responds simply, this time with a small grumble. Komaeda seems to also find humor in this.

"Here, Hinata-kun," and he takes a hold of the arm Hinata was using to cover his face, pushing it out of the way.

Hinata had kept his eyes open this time, and in this position, he had no choice but to make eye contact with Komaeda. He doesn't find it much fair that he looked much more stable then himself, aside from the obvious arousal.

In fact, he looks almost amused, and Hinata is reminded of why exactly he enjoyed keeping his head buried in pillows.

"Wow," is his unneeded observant, "I think you're blushing even redder than that vibrator inside you."

This is what finally seems to get the words out of Hinata, somehow finding it in himself to be peeved despite the current situation. "Well, obviously, you ass," he objects, covering Komaeda's face with his hand, though not with enough pressure to actually push him away, much less hurt him. "When you do shit like this, I…"

"Aha, are you actually peeved at me?" Luckily Komaeda didn't take the wrong idea from this, merely grabbing ahold of the hand used to block him and entwining it with his own, in order to properly pin it beside Hinata's head. "Apologies, then. It's hard for me not to tease you when your reactions are so… cute."

Ah, that word again. With how many times he's used it when they're together like this, Hinata would figure it was one of Komaeda's favorite words.

He opens his mouth to say something, though he's not sure exactly what yet, only for Komaeda to seize that opportunity to bring their mouths together.

It's embarrassing just how easily Hinata finds himself melting into the kiss, allowing himself to shut his eyes and fully revel in the feeling of their tongues together.

It's undignified and sloppy, but it's enough to get him into a bit of haze, to the point where when Komaeda pulls away and warns that he's going to "turn it on", he isn't quite sure what he means until it's too late.

Luckily, Komaeda starts the toy at an incredibly low pace, but with it still being pushed against his prostate, Hinata still reacts wildly, giving out a strangled noise as he tilts his head up.

Right. How did he forget it was a VIBRATOR?

The feeling is almost completely foreign, the faint buzz that courses through him surprisingly pleasurable, compared to the previous uncomfortableness he had felt before.

"Good?" Comes Komaeda's almost concerned voice, Hinata hearing it only distinctly.

"Yeah," he manages, his voice already slightly strained, and he almost considers just shutting up when he realises it. "Really good."

Encouraged, Hinata feels as Komaeda grabs onto the hilt of the toy, before slowly pushing and thrusting it in, bit by bit.

Hinata had his eyes squeezed shut so hard he was practically seeing patterns. He keeps a hand to his mouth, as though trying to muffle any more noises from his mouth, but for the most part, failing.

Even just this is overwhelming, Komaeda purposely brushing past all his sensitive parts, but the vibrations still hitting them dead on.

And when Komaeda tests pushing up the intensity level, it only has Hinata writhing more, abandoning the idea of covering his mouth in favor of grabbing onto the sheets beneath him.

"Fuck," He exclaims, squinting open his eyes only enough to make out a blurry view of the ceiling, "good, that feels good, Komaeda-"

And all at once, when it feels like it was going to go for another amp, the pleasure stops as the vibrations suddenly turn off with a click.

Hinata's eyes suddenly snap open fully, looking through his haze as though seeing would help him find out why it stopped.

"Ah, sorry, sorry," is Komaeda's small apology, and Hinata uses his spare strength to prop himself up on his elbows in order to look at him properly.

While he no doubt looks much worse, Komaeda still looks like a bit of a mess himself, face flushed red and eyes reflecting that of almost desperation.

"It's just that I'm close to my limit too," and he pauses briefly to sit up on his knees, making a point as he slinks his fingers underneath the waistband of his underwear, pulling them down enough to reveal his cock, the tip already dotted with pre cum. A small smile and a low voice asking a simple question of, “can I?”

With how fast he feels his face fluster, Hinata wishes he had just kept himself lying down, but instead reverts to looking away once again. Despite this, he nods, by now probably afraid of his own voice sounding weird.

Well, to be perfectly honest, he had been expecting them to try out the vibrator more, but he wasn’t going to object to doing it the “natural” way. It really wasn’t a big deal, afterall.

And so he gets back in a comfortable position for Komaeda to get on top of him, happily allowing him to bring their mouths together again, wrapping his arms around his neck.

Though the kiss gets more sloppy when Komaeda takes their dicks in one hand, grinding them together in a way that has Hinata moaning into his mouth, though it isn’t as intense as it was when the vibrator was on.

But that quickly changes, when almost out of nowhere, Komaeda uses his free hand to switch back on the toy.

Komaeda was lucky he was wearing a shirt, or Hinata would have definitely scratched him hard enough to bleed, with how hard he clutches onto his short sleeves.

He makes a strangled, loud gasp, that separates the kiss for only a moment, before Komaeda merely deepens it once again.

Overstimulation hits Hinata like a truck, with the frotting that only gets more messy as pre cum spills over themselves, and as Komaeda uses his spare hand to do the “back and forth” that he had before. Combined with the almost suffocating feeling of groaning into each other’s mouths, his head is already getting into that hazy state that only Komaeda can make him feel.

“Nng- ha- Nagi-!” incomprehensible cries spill out of his mouth whenever Komaeda leaves it for a split second in order to take a breath, but never objecting to any of it. Because in that haze is an unfathomable pleasure, whenever Komaeda brushed their tips together, or when the vibrations directly hit his sensitive spots- feelings that are quickly building up to an orgasm.

He knows that Komaeda is getting close too, when he finally breaks their kiss(that was hardly a kiss anymore, but just a wet clambering of tongues), and instead moves to teasing Hinata’s collarbone with nips and sucks, not even bothering to continue thrusting the toy into him. But that’s unneeded anyways, because any lost pleasure is made up for by him turning it up a full notch.

After that, Hinata is most definitely doomed to not last any longer. His instincts take over him, as he digs into both Komaeda’s hair and shirt like it’s a lifeline, toes curling up in the sheets, and all at once, his vision goes blurry.

If he makes any noise in his climax, he doesn’t hear it, and he briefly thinks that he must have passed out with just how hard he had come.

When he regains his senses after what feels like a half-hour, his breaths are heavy, barely registering Komaeda in a similar state on top of him. He does, however, register the feeling of the vibrator still buzzing inside him, but by now, it’s just uncomfortable. He reaches a shaky hand to shut it off, but Komaeda beats him to it, and with a small click, he finally feels relieved.

They stay in that state for what feels like hours, before Komaeda finally speaks up, his voice still exhausted.

“So, ha, how was it?”

Hinata opens his mouth to respond, but he can’t find the right to say, so he merely let a single word spill out of his throat; “Wow.”

Had he had the strength, he probably would have lightly hit the top of Komaeda’s head when he heard his giggle ring in his ears.

[craftypeaceturtle]

Distanced, part 2

Summary: How are these useless students coping with life?

Note: This is a group chat fic, my first one so this might not be that good! Also this contains swearing. Eventual intrulogical. 

Part 1 here!

.

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Friday, 13:02

Hello, sorry to interrupt, but I just want to ask where you gathering your sources? Are there any particular databases you’re using? Thank you.

Remus Prince: I’m just going through the read list.

The reading list? But that only has one text that could be anything remotely useful for this topic!

Remus Prince: ye but it’s a starting point

Remus Prince: like u can read it and then read whatever it references.

Are we allowed to do that?

Remus Prince: wha

Remus Prince: DUH! 

Surely that must count as plagiarism or something of the sort. You can’t use someone else’s sources.

Remus Prince: u sound so stupid

Remus Prince: u’ll read the book it references and form ur own interpretation.

Remus Prince: u’ll get different quotes

Remus Prince: u’ll be using it for a different argument

Remus Prince: why would u not be allowed to read texts!

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Friday, 14:13

Okay I emailed Dr Smith and he said it was fine. Thank you for the advice.

Remus Prince: OMG

Remus Prince: You actually told the teacher on me!

The teacher agreed with you? You’re not in trouble.

Remus Prince: THAT WAS MY SECRET!

Remus Prince: now the teachers actually think I’m capable

If it makes you feel better, I did not mention your name.

Remus Prince: you really had to double check?

Maybe I was being a little paranoid but I don’t think you understand the crisis I’m currently having. I typically spend hours running around the library and searching random titles to figure out suitable texts. When all this time I could have just been using the references! I am beyond furious and relieved at this new technique to research. 

Remus Prince: ah of course

Remus Prince: you totally came across that way in the 2 messages you sent

My world view has been fractured, I think that justifies not texting much. 

Remus Prince: why did you apologise

Excuse me?

Remus Prince: HAH

Remus Prince: now who sucks at reading!

Remus Prince: You said sorry in the first message.

I wasn’t sure if you were in a lecture or class. It’s polite.

Remus Prince: nah

Remus Prince: I’d answer even if I was.

That is not nearly as comforting as you are intending. How far along are you in your research?

Remus Prince: honestly?

Remus Prince: I’ve read five pages in on a book on the reading list. 

Remus Prince: I’ve done like nothing.

That’s indeed some amount of research. Again, as long as you are done by the 15th then whatever it takes.

Remus Prince: See you said no judgement but I picked up a lot of judgement

We have already agreed your reading comprehension is not the best.

Remus Prince: HAH

Remus Prince: so what are u up to?

Actually working on the research project.

Remus Prince: im bored

Remus Prince: I’ve been sitting waiting for my washing machine for like 9 hours 

Remus Prince: maybe later I will do work

I sincerely doubt it has been nine hours. How come you’re washing your clothes at such an awkward time?

Remus Prince: Awkward?

I can’t think of many students who would wash their clothes in the middle of the week day with classes. 

Remus Prince: every1 washes their stuff on the weekend

Remus Prince: plus everyone knows the weekend is for doing nothing. Might as well get all my jobs done now.

You really plan to do nothing during the weekend?

Remus Prince: hells ye

Remus Prince: maybe, at most, I’ll send Dee to campus coffee

As long as you’re done by the 2nd. Though I really should congratulate you on your superior taste to coffee shops.

Remus Prince: ?

If universal opinion existed, then Campus Coffee being the best coffee shop would be considered one. For whatever ridiculous reason, both Patton and Roman don’t really like it. 

Remus Prince: really

Remus Prince: I thought I saw Ro go in.

Roman occasionally practises lines with his other theatre colleagues and that is always where they meet up. But he never buys a drink as he is apparently a literal man child and cannot cope with a drink that isn’t just chocolate and milk.

Remus Prince: RIGHT??????

Remus Prince: my roomie V likes to pretend he takes coffee but he can only drink hot choc. 

Remus Prince: He doesn’t deserve coffee anyway

Exactly! Have you talked to Remy there?

Remus Prince: YE

Remus Prince: He practically forced me to be his friend with how incredible he makes coffee

Remus Prince: He’ll even add energy drink to mine!

Okay maybe that is a little strange. But I wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment. He finally convinced me to leave my usual order of a white coffee and I have not regretted it. 

He doesn’t actually add energy drink to your coffee right?

Remus Prince: ye he does but don’t worry he bullies me for it

Remus Prince: The entire time I sit and drink it he’ll be holding up his phone with 911 dialed.

That seems fair.   

Remus Prince: without being so incredibly forward

Remus Prince: do you want me to grab you a coffee now

What do you mean?

Remus Prince: Well im bored

Remus Prince: and it’s your fault for talking coffee

Remus Prince: now I really want coffee

Remus Prince: I’m now heading that direction.

I’m sorry but I cannot meet up right now. I’m doing work and then I want to be prompt coming home to help my roommate.

Remus Prince: fair thought id offer

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Friday, 14:20

If you’re still willing, I am sitting in the library and I would truly appreciate it if you could drop off the coffee. 

I can pay.

Obviously this is up to you. 

Remus Prince: soz was walking

Remus Prince: ye I can do that

Sorry for not being able to sit around, but I do appreciate this. 

Remus Prince: ur fine

Remus Prince: what u want

Firstly, it is “you’re”. Secondly, without sounding like a cliche film character, just say my name. Remy makes an effort to give me a slightly different order every day to “widen my tastes”.

Remus Prince: wow

Wow?

Remus Prince: For the very epitome of the nerd stereotype, did you really hit me with that “just say my name and they’ll know” trope?

Please, I can be cool.

Remus Prince: Are you begging?

Remus Prince: Also

Remus Prince: what do you look like again?

I’m sorry?

Remus Prince: reading comprehension! Fairly simple question.

I am wearing a black polo shirt with a blue tie. Caucasian with shaved hair. 5′10. 

Remus Prince: how efficient.

May I ask why?

Remus?

Remus Prince: Soz I just got our orders. 

Remus Prince: I’m really bad at faces.

You could have simply asked where I would be. I’m on the second floor, computer room 209. There’s a few others here but I’ll wave once you walk in. 

Remus Prince: okay maybe that would’ve made more sense

Remus Prince: shutup.

I know I have stated this before, but we have indeed talked before. You will recognise me. 

Remus Prince: listen I’m not fucking around.

Remus Prince: I am genuinely shit at faces

Remus Prince: it was one question prick

I apologise. I didn’t realise. 

Remus Prince: Hey I’m here, now heading up. 

.

.

MESSAGES: To Padre!!

Friday, 16:00

Greetings wonderful Pat! Did you perhaps end up baking today like you said you would?

Padre!!: Heya Ro! Yeah, we made cupcakes! We didn’t fancy making icing but we did have choc chips!

AW YEAH! Just wanted to check so I know whether to buy cake. Anything I need to pick up while I’m here?

Padre!!: All good here. 

Padre!!: Logan saw Remus today.

hE DID????????

Padre!!: Yeah, he brought him coffee. Some special coffee, not his white coffee.

ASJKDGA

(also how on this great big boundiful earth do you know his usual coffee order?)

Padre!!: Because that’s what family does!

Why would he bring him coffee?

Padre!!: I have no idea. Logan didn’t really talk about it. 

He didn’t talk about it?!?!?!?!?!?!!?

Padre!!: I don’t know what to tell you. He got all quiet. He makes it sound like they don’t even like each other but he still brought him a coffee. 

EWEWEW

YOU DON’T THINK HE’S TRYING TO MAKE A MOVE

Padre!!: I don’t know. It sounds like it but Logan said they had a bit of a tiff in the texts.

... a tiff?

Padre!!: Like a small argument.

No I knew what it means, I meant it in a “omg you’re so adorable for describing a disagreement as a tiff”. 

Padre!!: I want to joke around Ro but I am a little worried about him. He acted fine after the coffee and he said they didn’t talk. It just seems like such a weird thing to do! I’m worried Remus would try and pull something. This sounds exactly like how all those stories you tell begins. 

Lo’s not an idiot. 

He’s a nerd. 

There’s no way he would fall into his trap. He’d let us know if something wasn’t right. 

Padre!!: Good point.

I’ll be home in like 5 mins. I’ll run.

Padre!!: You don’t have to Ro.

Padre!!: I’m just overreacting.

Padre!!: Ro?

Padre!!: You better make sure you’re still looking both ways even when running!

[jenniferxprentiss]

You Are In Love -> 9/?

chapter nine. three hearts.

Will had done exactly what Emily warned her he would do, told her he was coming and canceled a little under an hour before the appointment. The way he treated JJ and their unborn child never failed to fill Emily with a seething anger, heart racing and breath quickening at only the thought of him. She had to suppress a smile at the memory of the sickening crack when her fist connected with his face, easily one of the proudest moments of her adult life.

hi! okay. this has been SUCH A LONG WAIT for y’all. and I hope this little bit of fluff brings you all some joy as I get into the *real* plot of this fic. as always, the biggest of thank yous goes out to my group chat for always inspiring me and helping me with my writing — and reminding me to take breaks. without you all, this fic wouldn’t exist. so thank you. I love u all. ALSO. a oneshot & 2 chapters to fics in a weekend? y’all do be blessed.

tag list? tag list. lmk if u wanna be added xo. @jjsgirlfriend @whiskey-fluent @babyblockcolorcat @criminalmindsgonewrong @heat-waveee @anepiphany @j3mily @dont-trustyourfeelings @blakes-dictionxry @clockedstar @ellegreenawy

————

Fuck Will.

Fuck Will for being the deadbeat father she knew he was going to be, for stringing JJ along and never following through. Emily tapped her fingers impatiently against the steering wheel, stuck in bumper to bumper traffic — just her luck as she was trying to race across town to get to JJ before the sonogram, Will having stood her up.

She was so angry when JJ declined her offer to go with her in favor of Will, couldn’t describe the crushing hurt she felt. She tried to remind herself that she and JJ were nothing — not in a romantic way, at least, despite the stirring feelings she had been feeling for the other woman since she had moved in.

Another car cut her off and Emily slammed on the horn, yelling an obscenity out the window. She took a deep breath, remembered how sad and scared JJ sounded when she called, begging Emily to come to the sonogram only thirty minutes before her appointment.

Will had done exactly what Emily warned her he would do, told her he was coming and canceled a little under an hour before the appointment. The way he treated JJ and their unborn child never failed to fill Emily with a seething anger, heart racing and breath quickening at only the thought of him. She had to suppress a smile at the memory of the sickening crack when her fist connected with his face, easily one of the proudest moments of her adult life.

She swung her car into a space in front of the doctor’s office before jumping out and hastily shoving quarters into the parking meter. Emily took the stairs two at a time, burst into the waiting room and noticed that JJ wasn’t there, having already been taken back to an exam room. Her heart sped up at the thought of missing the appointment — of letting JJ down.

“Can I help you?” The receptionist directed a warm smile towards Emily, looked over her glasses at her and back to the computer screen. “First appointment?”

“I’m here for JJ — Jennifer Jareau.” Her words came out in a rush, heart still pounding and hands fidgeting.

The woman’s eyes lit up in understanding, nodding quickly as though she knew something before writing on a visitor’s badge for Emily. She handed it over, a knowing smile on her face as she watched Emily affix the sticker on her shirt.

“Your wife told me you’d be coming, said you’d probably be right on time. She’s through that door and in the first room on the left.”

“My — thank you.”

Emily couldn’t help the way her face heated up in a red hot blush at the way the receptionist said JJ was her wife. She knew it wasn’t anything they had done or said — most people don’t take their friend to the first sonogram after their ex-boyfriend cancels — but the implication still filled Emily’s stomach with a nervous flutter. She knocked on the exam room door, waited for a soft murmur from the technician before she opened the door slowly, stepping inside and shutting it behind her.

The sight of JJ reclined on the bed, towel thrown over her stomach made Emily’s stomach flip worse than it already was — her bright blue eyes wide and filled with nervous excitement. She barely registered the technician making a joke about showing up in the nick of time, smiled politely as she watched JJ mouth a silent thank you, her lips curling up into a wide grin.

“Are you guys ready to see your baby?”

Emily nodded hesitantly, stood dutifully at JJ’s side and let her fingertips graze her shoulder. She couldn’t look away from the blue of her eyes — the way her lips were still twitching up into a smile despite every tell that she was trying to fight it, trying to be as serious as possible. Her eyes were immediately drawn to the subtle swell of JJ’s stomach when the ultrasound technician removed the towel and squirted the gel onto her stomach, letting out a breathy laugh when JJ jumped at the temperature of the gel.

The small bump made her heart flutter, eyes transfixed on the slightly tanned skin, mind racing with all of the possibilities for the future — visions of an infant cooing in a crib while JJ looked down and sang. She felt a pang in her chest when she reminded herself that no, that may not be the life JJ wanted to give her child — and it was just that, hers, and not Emily’s. She was brought from her thoughts when JJ reached up, fingers wiggling until Emily grasped her hand and she visibly relaxed, only to tense up again when the technician pressed the wand to her gel covered stomach.

They both stared at the dark screen, eyes transfixed on the grey and black static until it finally focused — a little gummy bear of a baby jumping around on the screen. JJ let out a delighted gasp, lips curled into a grin as Emily wiped tears from her face. She hadn’t expected to be so affected by the image, but she already loved this little baby so much it hurt.

“There you go, mommies… there’s your baby.”

“Oh I’m not…” Emily started, hastily wiping at the tears that were rapidly falling down her face.

She wasn’t a mother, this wasn’t her baby — hell, JJ wasn’t even her girlfriend, merely a friend that lived with her and fell into her bed occasionally. A roommate, and she had already reasoned with herself that she would be beyond lucky to be able to co-parent and cohabitate with JJ and the baby at best — knew it may not be a likely scenario and didn’t want to get her hopes up, despite the excited flutter in her stomach she felt when she let herself sit and think about it for too long.

“Shut up. You’re mom too.”

“You guys make a great couple, I can already tell you’re going to be amazing parents.” The technician tapped at the keyboard before moving the wand around, pressing down on another spot. “I just have to grab a few more…”

“Take your time.”

JJ meant what she said — would have been content to sit there all afternoon and watch both the bouncing baby on the screen and the light in Emily’s eyes as she stared, completely transfixed by the image. It was a look JJ couldn’t quite decipher — love, she could tell, but a bit of something else that made her heart flutter and stomach flip. It was the same feeling she got when Emily’s fingers grazed hers in the car on the way to work, the giddy happiness in the pit of her stomach that no one else seemed to ignite.

“And I’ve got it. Thanks for being so patient with me, ladies.” The ultrasound technician pulled the wand from JJ’s stomach, wiping it clean before handing Emily a towel to clean the gel and a sheet of pictures. “I think that’s all for today… when you get cleaned up you can just check out and book your next appointment.”

They both murmured out a thanks as the technician stepped out of the room, Emily already wiping gently at JJ’s stomach and cleaning the gel off. It was like there was a trance between them — neither able to speak or look at each other, only the slight protrusion of JJ’s stomach as it really settled in that there was, in fact, a tiny baby growing inside of her.

“Emily…” JJ’s fingers grazed Emily’s wrist gently, looked up at her face and waited for their eyes to make contact before continuing. “Thank you. For everything… for coming, for doing this with me.”

“Jayje, you don’t even have to ask, you know I’ll always…”

“I meant it.”

“You — what…?”

There was a pause between them as Emily tried to decipher what JJ meant by her statement. Her eyebrows were knit together in a look of confusion, eyes half squinted in a way that made JJ let out a soft, airy laugh. After a moment, she reached up and let her thumb graze Emily’s cheek, smiling gently at her.

“Meant that you’re mom too, we’re doing this together… if you want to?”

It was a loaded question and they both knew it, and this wasn’t the place to have that sort of conversation. Emily knew she wanted to — wanted to raise this baby with JJ more than she had ever wanted anything, so badly that it scared her a little bit — but rationalized with herself that they should probably sit down over lunch and discuss it.

“We need to leave before they send another patient in.” She noticed the way JJ’s face fell, pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head before pulling her shirt down over her stomach and gently patting the bump. “Hey, this isn’t a no, it’s a we’re not having this conversation in this doctor’s office because I’ll cry. Come on, we both have the rest of the day off… I have plans for us.”

“Plans?”

JJ hopped off the table, letting her hand bump against Emily’s until she got the hint and laced their fingers together — fell into step beside her as they rounded the corner and walked to the checkout counter. They were understaffed for as many patients as they had, receptionists bustling around the circular desk as they tried to tend to everyone at once. Emily waved her wrist, signaled to them that they could take as long as they needed, before turning to JJ with a slight smile.

“I may have reserved a table at Olive Garden for us, and it’s right by this darling baby boutique I found on Facebook.”

She watched as JJ’s eyes lit up to that sparkling, shiny blue she adored so much, the way her smile reached her eyes and wrinkled her nose. It was endearing, the way her entire body seemed to thrum with every emotion, from the good to the bad, always feeling so deeply, so purely. Emily found herself hoping that the same energy — the same ability to feel so truly — would be passed on to the baby dancing about in her stomach.

“How do you always manage to make bad days better?”

“I just do, I guess.”

A receptionist hurried over to where they were standing, breaking them from their trance and snapping them back into the real world — a world where more existed than just the energy between the two of them. Emily couldn’t tear her gaze away from JJ’s subtle smile as she spoke to the woman, nodding enthusiastically, a few strands of shorter hair falling from her ponytail and shaking into her face.

JJ slipped the appointment card in her pocket as they walked out, entering the elevator hand in hand with giddy smiles on their faces. She almost hated the fact that they drove separately, wished she could sit beside Emily and bask in the happiness she was feeling, just be with her and present in the moment. There was never pressure with her — never any pressure to be more than she wanted to be, to carry on conversation when words seemed too hard — always content to just exist together.

Outside of the office, too many eyes on them, Emily found herself able to let out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding. She let herself look at JJ — truly look at her, the way her eyes were still shining and cheeks pinkened in what could only be described as a glow. The way her hair was falling in her face, having been shook free from the confines of her ponytail, was endearing — and Emily found herself gazing deep into JJ’s eyes as her fingers gently brushed the hair back out of her face.

The metallic grind of the elevator doors opening broke them from the moment, from their lips slowly gravitating towards each other as though pulled by magnetic force. They laughed, straightening up and walking out of the elevator, Emily’s hand on the small of JJ’s back as she guided her to her car just a few spaces away from her own.

“Follow me to the restaurant?”

“I’d follow you anywhere, Emily Prentiss.”

[yume-fanfare]

hi i am that anon from like 29th Dec (last dang year) who said i read ur tsuki no hime and loved it and that u understand Aizou. i have read more of ur stuff since then and now i NEED to ask you for writing advice, on both characterization and general writing tips since I didnt mention it before. Sorry about that! i just forgot i sent an ask and i do not get notifs at all (or does anon asks not get notifs?) Also, ART STUDENT! That's why the nice art and art leaning!! I feel smart for sensing it

oh yup, tumblr doesn't send notifs for anon asks! but i'm glad you did see the answer anyway

this post is hideously long, so answer under the cut!

so, on characterization: it is mostly a matter of what would they say, rather than what you want them to say. the joke about "the characters do what they want to" instead of what the writer wants is pretty much true if you want them to be in character lol (that's why sometimes a little bit of OoC isn't too bad)

checking the source material is the most important thing: look at prior similar interactions the characters have had and how they reacted

this is kind of hard with LIPxLIP, as there aren't that many translated texts about them but with honeyworks the most canon and reliable thing to use as reference are the mvs. the mvs are drawn in a way that can pretty much be understood even if you don't have the lyrics, and sometimes it's even better if you can't read them, to properly focus on the images better

look at their expressions closely: while aizou is always explosive in his anger, yuujirou often has a more indifferent expression. so, when they fight, aizou is probably the one to blow up first while yuujirou maintains his composure better. it's kind of the classic "this was only a brief passing panel but i am going to expand on it" www

but the thing about fanfiction is that it's always a bit of a character analysis in itself. you don't start writing having already a color-coded folder of possible situations and reactions a character would have for each setting. you just throw the characters in a scenario and then think from there onwards, and eventually you'll be able to have the folder of situations and what you think their reactions would be like. (though, this links back to the prior point, if the characters have gone through a similar situation in canon, use that as guide! plus, finding little references to canon when reading is always fun)

for general writing, i'm going to mostly talk about my own experiences and process! i'm in no way a professional though

the basic is reading a lot. not just books but also fanfic. in fact, since you're writing fanfic, i Encourage you to read fanfic. even if your story ends up novel length, the way of treating the story is different from that of an actual novel. for example, because you're working under the premise that everyone knows the characters already. the general style of fics is different as well.

in fact, the style is the main reason i'm saying this slfkslfkslkf

read a lot of stuff and find a style you like. think of it as sewing together pieces from here and there to make a frankenstein amalgamation: this person's metaphors, the comparisons from here, the descriptions from there

personally, i adore the "long one-shot with a long title formatted (like this)" fics that are mostly feelings and descriptions and as little dialogue as possible, and some that occasionally play with the "show don't tell" rule, and some months ago i read a book whose descriptions amazed me because you could feel what the character was focusing on the most, rather than being general descriptions of the situation (i actually have a lot of thoughts about descriptions but that's a post for another day). but also i really like dialogue and plot-driven stories, descriptions can get boring and before trying to break rules, you have to be really good at following them

but, let's go step by step: developing an idea

for this i'm going to mostly reference the multichap i finished a while ago as an example

i started with just a few vague concepts in mind: non-idol au with aizou who does some sport and likes music but is insecure about his singing and yuujirou who does some music related thing and encourages him to sing in a way that's somehow related to the hozier song to noisemaking (sing), because it's what inspired me to write in the first place

then, from then onwards i wrote down what would happen in the first chapter of the story bullet-point-list-style, including things like the roommates part or the clubs the boys were in (at first yuujirou was in the choir club lol the change was a last second decision that idk why i took) and then bits of dialogue here and there that would be The Turning Points. those first dialogues were for the fight at the end of ch 1, the apology-date in ch 3 and then some vaguely unused ones for the "yuujirou encourages aizou" part, as those were the first key moments i thought of

because, since it's enemies to friends to lovers, an important aspect was character development

not all fics have character development bc not all of them are long enough (if you're aiming for short and sweet then there's no need). but if they do, i recommend you write down how the character was at the beginning of the story and then how they were at the end and then fill in the middle later, think of what those key turning points that made the character change were (the more little things you add, the more gradual it'll be)

samishigariya illustrates this very nicely: the song starts and finishes with the same lines, but the ending ones feel more light-hearted. the beginning has pre-arisa ken and pre-getting-along-with-yuujirou aizou, when they were the lonely people the title mentioned, and the ending, when they're not lonely anymore. the in between can be seen in depth during the other songs: ken before arisa was a playboy who didn't take love seriously, but after meeting her he realized that games were not all there was to love; and aizou used to be quite cranky and high-key a loner, but then he "meets precious things and knows of love". i will not elaborate on that because this isn't an aiyuu post but Oh You Know

for the fic, aizou would go through that same process, more or less: someone who doesn't really form meaningful connections with people but who, in the end, would end up having quite a bunch of people who care about him as his relationship with yuujirou advances too

since the relationship was the main focus, i wrote a very simple outline for how it would develop throughout 5 hypothetical chapters that was just: 1. civil w each other but mostly bad > 2. bad > 3. half friends > 4. pining > 5. date

and then with that in mind and the bullet point list, the final basic outline ended up like this:

there were scraped ideas and ideas that made it in later, but i believe having a simple outline, a bare skeleton to add things to, is important. stories need continuity, development requires a prior buildup

it's especially important in multichapter fics where you post as you write, you need to have a more or less clear idea of what's going to happen because you can't ignore scenes you've already posted

shorter stories don't need it as much, you can think as you go, but it's still helpful to know where you're going with things to avoid getting stuck

and, on getting stuck: don't be afraid of deleting things. if you can't figure out how to continue things, then delete the situation and start again. it might feel like you'd be wasting time but in the end, it is so much better than being stuck on the same scene for weeks

in fact, you don't have to write in order. jump to the next scene and you'll figure it out later. you Can write the scene you want to write and then build everything else around it

it's normal to write a scene and then realize it would make more sense later in the story, or that it would be better if you added another scene earlier, or sometimes you just find it easier to jump from one part of the story to another. rely on your outline to keep track of what you've written, what you have left to write and what's the best way to arrange your story. make your story understandable

which bring us to editing

there's a lot of much better posts on editing stories, but yeah ctrl+f is your best friend: don't repeat yourself too much. and be sure to vary sentence and paragraph length, as well as sentence structure, to give dynamism to the writing

now, i've mentioned before the show, don't tell rule, but i'm going to talk a bit more about it because it's quite important

once again there's a lot of posts that explain more in depth what it is, so i'm not going to expand too much on that, but, very basically, try to avoid things like "then some time passed and they became friends". explain it: what happened exactly? how did they become friends? if it's important, show it to us, instead of summarizing

since things like these make the story longer, it also gives room for more development and proper explanation for things that happen

for example, the fic was originally going to start with them already in the room, and the whole situation would have been explained in a single paragraph somewhere, but by actually adding the scene where they first arrive to the dorms and argue with the lady at the main desk, the story flows better and it let me actually describe their first meeting

and uuuhhh i think that's all? this took super long to write i hope i didn't forget any super basic stuff lol

i want to add that for enemies to lovers i greatly recommend this post bc it's super good but yeah i think that's basically it, if you have any more specific questions just shoot me an ask

[farahswife]

foooor my wife Tulsi: 3, 7, 10, 20, 22, 29, 30 👀

ask my ocs a question! if u like ✨

3) Ask them to describe their love interest.

(this screamed elf wife rights so HERE u go 👀)

“Love interest?” Tulsi’s dark eyes are blown wide, before darting quickly to the window. She is bent over her lap a little, as if in pain. “I...hm.”

A beat passes, then another. Each moment compacts in the stifling air. When sudden footsteps thunder down the staircase outside, the elf jumps, eager- but withers just as fast.

Tulsi had spent so long sifting through every line of Anya’s face, every note of her voice, trying to glimpse a single thought which bore her name.

It occurs to her then that she never stopped searching, even in Anya’s absence.

Tulsi turns back to you, a wry smile tugging at her lips. It feels self deprecating.

“Saying all this makes it real, doesn’t it?” her voice comes out in a soft mumble, “Anya thinks herself a pillar of stone, and jokes as if she doesn’t care. But something in her burns bright.”

In this quiet, the yearning in Tulsi’s voice rings like a Chantry bell.

“I love her. I love her too much to burden her.”

7) Describe them in three words. Now let them describe themself in three words

I would describe Tulsi as friendly, repressed and trusting. She’s definitely one of those bubbly people who just feels a bit cut-off. Her kindness and tendency to get easily attached unfortunately leaves her very prone to heartbreak- hence her (poor) attempts to hide her feelings.

Tulsi would describe herself as optimistic, helpful and hardworking. Most of these relate to how useful she can be to others, not divulging much in terms of her actual thoughts (or so she would think). In reality, she’s more of an open book than she likes.

10) What age do they most want to be right now?

Tulsi wants to be older, maybe another 10 or so years. Enough to feel settled in her skin. The past is too much to bear, the present too unstable. The future is hopeful, and lends better to optimism.

20) What do they like that nobody else does?

She has the absolute worst taste in literature. The prime example of this is her semi-secret love for Varric’s novels (which she reads for the plot, unbelievably)?

22) Do they like being called pet names? Do they call other people pet names? What’s their go-to?

A pet name is the most efficient way to see her go bright red in public. In private she’ll laugh bashfully, especially if it’s something ridiculous.

Her occasional nickname for her S/O is ‘amar jaaner tukra’ - ‘a piece of my life’. Though she can’t keep a straight face whilst saying it (oh god so cheesy), she is entirely sincere.

29) What recurring dreams do they have?

Her recurring dreams are usually nightmares. Many involve the battle of Ostagar, or Daveth and Jory. The worst of them involve her family’s rejection, though their faces are blurred by time.

30) What would they do if they knew it would be forgiven?

Say no more often. Be a little angrier, a little more vengeful. As it stands, she is usually able to bite her tongue for the sake of diplomacy- but sometimes she wishes she could be a little more ruthless.

If she were to be really honest... Tulsi would want to seek out her family. The thought of their scorn kept her away for years, but she wants answers. Whether she’d actually get them is another story entirely.