#if you do everything right to avoid decreasing their relationship

[4dkellysworld]

Signs of Progress

The below is the result of a conversation I had with ChatGPT which I edited a bit. I thought it was great and might be useful to some so wanted to share it here. These are some signs that you've made progress on this path (it expands on what Lester talks about). I think it paints a pretty good picture of what it looks like when one has progressed on this path and can be helpful to check in with yourself and your practices (although do this from a place of peace and freedom, not from ego!).

Detachment from Ego and Self-Identification

Dissolving of Personal Story: The story of “me” becomes less dominant in your thoughts. You stop identifying with past experiences, achievements, or failures, and see them as events that happened to the body-mind but not to your true self. The constant narrative of “who you are” loses its significance.

Decreased Ego Involvement: Ego-driven thoughts like “I need to prove myself” or “I must protect my image” become rare. You no longer feel the need to build an identity through actions, achievements, or relationships. When ego-driven desires arise, you notice them and let them pass without identifying with them.

Ongoing Release of Ego Concepts: You have let go of many ego-driven thoughts, beliefs, and past conditioning, recognizing them as not truly you. You can recognize when egoic thoughts or reactions arise, but instead of getting pulled into them, you watch them like passing clouds. As ego concepts arise, you continue to observe them without attachment, understanding that these are just passing mental phenomena rather than aspects of your true self. There’s a growing distance between these thoughts and your awareness, which makes it easier to remain non-identified. This ongoing process of recognizing and releasing these patterns helps you stay detached from the ego and reinforces your non-identification with it.

Not Labelling or Adding Meaning: You no longer define, label or attach significance, meaning, stories or judgments to life and its experiences—everything is seen as simply neutral. You perceive events and sensations without categorizing them as good or bad, right or wrong, this or that. This allows you to maintain a neutral and clear awareness, and engage with life directly and openly, free from the distortions of personal judgments and biases. By not attaching any meaning, you allow each moment to be experienced in its pure form.

Indifference and Non-Resistance

Emotional Detachment: You find yourself emotionally neutral, regardless of circumstances. Feelings may arise, but they pass through without sticking to you, without your involvement. This doesn’t mean apathy, but rather that you aren’t emotionally swayed by external events or your own thoughts. There’s an inner stability that isn’t disrupted by the ups and downs of life.

Consistent Indifference to Externals: You are consistently indifferent to the world’s events. This doesn’t mean you don’t care, but that the happenings of the external world don’t disturb your inner peace regardless of what happens. You watch them with detachment, knowing that they don’t define you.

Non-Resistance to Pain or Discomfort: Physical or emotional discomfort is less likely to throw you into resistance or avoidance. You recognize that pain is a passing experience, not something to be attached to or defined by, allowing you to experience it without adding suffering through mental resistance.

Presence and Flow

Living in the Now: You spend far less time in your mind thinking about the past or future. Being present in the moment becomes your default state. The mind quiets down, and you’re more present in the here and now, with fewer distractions pulling you away from the present. You find a natural ease in maintaining a calm, unobtrusive mental state.

Openness to Life’s Flow: You stop resisting life’s natural rhythm. There’s an acceptance that whatever happens is part of a greater unfolding. You trust the process, even when it doesn’t align with your preferences. You are open and allow whatever may happen, even when it brings discomfort, because you’re no longer attached to how things “should” be.

Effortlessness in Action: There’s a shift where actions become more effortless, as though life is flowing through you rather than you trying to push or force things to happen. You no longer feel the pressure of “making things happen” but instead act naturally in each moment as needed, without the stress of outcome-based thinking.

Fresh Innocence and Curiosity: You approach life with a child-like sense of curiosity, exploring experiences with wonder and without preconceived judgments. You see life with a sense of innocence and an open and fresh perspective, allowing experiences to unfold without attaching meaning or being affected by past beliefs, feelings or experiences. This allows you to experience each moment as it is—fresh and unfiltered. You engage with the world playfully and openly, treating each moment as a fresh discovery rather than through the lens of past conditioning.

Freedom without Expectations

Freedom from Expectations: You let go of expectations, both from yourself and others. Instead of being driven by future outcomes or the desire for things to go a certain way, you’re more focused on simply being and allowing life to unfold. "Your" actions are more about allowing the flow of life to happen as it does rather than controlling or predicting it.

A Growing Sense of Freedom: There’s an expanding sense of freedom, not tied to circumstances, but coming from the inner realization that you are not bound by the mind, ego, or external world. This freedom is quiet but profound, where life’s pressures and demands lose their hold over you.

Acceptance of Impermanence: You come to deeply understand that everything in the external world is transient. Rather than clinging to experiences, objects, or people, you accept that everything is in constant change. You stop resisting this fact, which results in less struggle and more inner peace.

Joy and Connection

Spontaneous Joy or Contentment: As identification decreases, you might notice a natural sense of joy, peace, or contentment arising, not because of any external reason, but simply because you’re no longer entangled with ego. This joy is subtle and doesn’t depend on outer conditions; it’s a result of being at ease with what is.

Deeper Connection to Others and Nature: As ego identification fades, you may feel a deeper sense of connection to others, not from needing validation, but from genuine compassion and empathy. You might also feel more connected to nature as the boundaries between "you" and the world soften.

Synchronicity and Harmony

Synchronicity and Flow: As you detach from controlling life and the mind, you may notice an increase in synchronicities—meaningful coincidences that feel as though life is guiding you. Life unfolds in a way that feels more harmonious, and things “just happen” without you trying to force them.

[marigoidz]

Hate it when someone hcs a character I like as a lesbian and I disagree with their reasoning

[colourstreakgryffin]

Omg I love your platonic alastor writings!!

Can you do headcanons for alastor x daughter!reader where the reader is now in her teens and gets embarrassed when alastor still treats her like a little girl?

Haha! Alastor being that embarrassing dad who doesn’t want his princess to grow up be like— I definitely can, darling. Consider it done! Kinda short… but done!

Alastor- Old Habits, Never Die

God… Dad, please stop. You’re embarrassing me!

This is all you think. Being the daughter of the Radio Demon is pretty hard. As a little girl, you didn’t have to deal with much but now as a teenager, almost around eighteen, you have begun trying to befriend Sinners(with very little success) and the small amount of friends you manage to make with the much older sinners around you, it ends with them creeped out by your Dad

You want to lash out at Alastor for the way he treats you but you can’t really blame him. He just loves you but then again, you hate how he always babies and coddles you. You’re not seven years old anymore; you’re seventeen, you don’t want people thinking you’re some spoiled brat or a overly daddy’s little princess

You’re already universally feared for having traces of your father’s immense powers and as well as universally disliked by a big handful of sinner demons for being your father’s daughter. So, you’re pretty isolated as a whole and Alastor just makes it worse for you

Alastor isn’t aware that the way he acts is humiliating and degrading towards you. He just wants his babygirl to never grow up and he can’t just watch you go out shopping on your own and see you wear bigger clothing on your bigger body and not cry hysterically at seeing his beloved daughter grow up

Alastor just wants one more day of you as a little five year old again. Where you’d run up to him and cry about your nightmares, and he’d put you on his chest, sit down in a rocking chair and sing you back to sleep. He loved those days, he wants just one more. He misses his babygirl so young and little and childish

Alastor is that type of dad who wants to stay in touch with you and your friends so he tries to do the ‘cool stuff’ you younglings like, in hopes to bond with you further, he can’t bond with you over dolls and dress up. He’ll bond with you through the new things you like

Alastor, of course, won’t stop treating you like a little girl. He’ll talk baby-like, he’ll get you food, he’ll take your belongings to hold himself, he’ll hold your hand, he’ll do your hair up for you. He does everything for you and is so blind in his fatherly love for you, to realise how selfish his actions are and how careless he’s become, as a result of not wanting to lose you as a child

Overtime, this unintentionally harsh treatment begins to strain your relationship with Alastor and you grow less patient with him, establishing boundaries and ordering him to stop inserting himself into your life

He doesn’t take that kindly. Alastor is offended and angry that you’re annoyed with him. He is your father, he has every right to be apart of your life, social or literal and he begins to argue with you

You have to constantly lay down the truth that you’re not a little girl anymore and Alastor refuses to accept it as fact. He wants you to stay young and childish, and he won’t ever admit that he knows your time as a child is up and he doesn’t want to lose that little princess

But don’t worry, Alastor will soften up and try decrease this behaviour and treatment when he realises you’re avoiding him and he tries his best to stop treating you like a little girl… despite, all he sees when he looks at his teenage daughter is the little deer-featured child who ran to him when she was scared…

He’ll try his darnest stop it for his babygirl, even if he doesn’t want to. He just wants you happy more than anything

“Darling… look. Look, I get it. I’ve been acting rather… unfavourably towards you and I apologise, it’s just… hard to have watched you go from so little to so big… it’s… it kinda hurts”

[stayinhellevator]

Asymptopes

"We're bound to break and my hands are tied."

Synopsis: By fate's design, you had found refuge in Seungcheol's arms but now you had gone too far from the point of return, leaving the two of you secretly yearning for each other.

Pairing: Scoups X fem!Reader

Genre: Soulmate AU, Angst, Forbidden Love

Word Count: 2315

Warnings: Cuss words, fxf relationship, brief mentions of cheating technically (not reader)

Playlist: Rewrite The Stars ~ James Arthur, Anne Marie

<Prev> <Masterlist> <Next>

"Why are you avoiding me?"

All your hard work of trying to hide from Choi Seungcheol had gone to waste when you ultimately landed into his muscular arms, that latched onto your waist so tight, as if you'd vanish the minute he loosened his grip by even a finger.

Perhaps you would and he already knew.

"I'm not avoiding you. I'm protecting you."

You managed to reply, eyes darting frantically around the dancing pairs, wanting to locate your soulmate, desperate to find an excuse to escape the brown orbs of his, that were seeking answers from you.

But boy you could never resist their magnetic pull, automatically drawn towards him, as if a puzzle piece snapping into its rightful place. Like you belonged.

But you both knew you didn't.

"Protecting me? Protecting me from what? Are you even hearing yourself."

With every anguished whisper that came out of his lips, his grip on you seemed to tighten further as was the rapidly decreasing distance between your bodies, making you panic.

What if someone saw the two of you? What would they think? Worse if your respective soulmates saw you? What would they say?

And how were you going to recover from the loss of Seungcheol's warmth? All the time you had spent trying to steel yourself was for nothing? Why doesn't he understand?

"Protecting you from breaking further Seungcheol. I'm protecting both of us from more pain. The more we try to steal moments together, the harder it becomes for us to withdraw when we both know we can't be together."

You finally let out, as if agonised to be the only one holding these depressing thoughts. You wanted to reason with him; let him know that you did care and that's why you were putting a distance between you two.

His eyes seemed to soften after knowing you were as miserable without him as he without you but you knew the topic was far from over; not with how he was so stubborn when he decided he wanted something to go his way. And you were proven right when instead of letting you go, he twirled you round and brought you back in.

To the onlookers, everything should seem normal. You two were strangers who got each other as dance partners when it was a turn for exchanging them; if not for his wandering arms that caged you in with a familiarity of that of a lover; if not for your eyes doing all the talking that your mouth couldn't; if not for the chemistry between you that was hard to ignore.

And it worried you. The onlookers, the gossip-mongers, the rumours and the assumptions. You weren't a stranger to any of those. But worse was when negativities these came from the people you know. You didn't want your mutual friends or colleagues or families to see the two of you so vulnerable like this. You didn't want the drama the scandal of your affair with Seungcheol would bring to the auspicious wedding.

Seokmin didn't deserve this. Even if he was an oblivious jerk who couldn't see just how down bad your sister was for him, all her life, he was a sweetheart. He had never wronged you or your family and technically not your sister too because this was what the fate had in mind for her. So no you didn't want to ruin Seokmin's happy day.

And you can't bring yourself to even imagine what would happen if your soulmate sees the two of you like this. Would she be sad? Disappointed? Angry? Indifferent? Who knows?

Heck! Why should you even care? You were in this mess because of your soulmate, who made it extremely clear that she was in love with someone else, the day you first saw her. And that's how Choi Seungcheol first met you, completely heartbroken and helpless at the hands of his sister.

You still remember breaking down in his arms three years back when you saw your soulmate with his sister in your shared bed; she couldn't be any less empathetic that you had seen her with someone else and instead caused a scene that you breached her privacy.

Ever since then, he had been your rock, your anchor that saved you from drowning in your misery. Your soulmate would often get defensive when she saw the two of you together, because of course the bond between you two was still very much real whether you two accepted each other or not. She wouldn't let you go because then her soul would be hollow and she wouldn't be able to be with her lover.

The truth is you never even got a chance to fall in love with her, which is why her soul was still intact, even after still technically betraying you. Initially when you were bitter about the whole scenario, you wanted to stay like that until her soul started deteriorating and she ended up all hurt and alone, just like you.

But that was before Seungcheol. Your sweet shining knight in armour, who was unfortunately born without a soul bond, making it nearly impossible for him to find love as bondless souls were rare.

And like any cliche movie, as fate would have it, you soon realised that the feelings you were hoping to have for his sister started sprouting naturally for him, without even knowing when andhow. You both found love in each other and soon enough, your pathetic life didn't matter to you anymore, so long as you both had each other. And just like that, you went from nothing-to-lose rejected soul to putting-everything-at-stake for this man accepted soul.

Your otherwise nonchalant soulmate realised in no time that you were hiding something, rather someone from her, because you still hadn't punished her and your ignorance started bothering her. Now, she was always breathing down your neck, hoping to "catch you in the act".

A truly masterpiece she was. You thought it was hilarious how unfortunate you and your sister were when it came to love and soulmates. You used to sympathise with your sister as she yearned for Seokmin's reciprocal in solitude and now you weren't faring any better than her.

You sometimes wonder how your soulmate could be Seungcheol's sibling, when her brother was the most affectionate, considerate and pure-hearted person you had ever met.

A sudden prick, as if you were being watched, brought you out of your thoughts as your eyes met a woman's kind and empathetic pair. You knew her as Seungcheol's friend's soulmate, a kind person or at least as Cheol told you. She looked at you as if she knew your circumstances and you wouldn't be surprised if she did for her soulmate had been Seungcheol's friend for as long as you can remember. You trusted her to safeguard your secret but not the increasing stranger glances that were starting to notice you.

"Seungcheol I don't want your sister to see us together. I don't want any drama tonight."

You tried to negotiate but a tic in his jaw was your answer; he was annoyed that you cared about everyone but him to leave him all alone for months without any explanation.

"I don't give a fuck if she sees us and if she truly cared about drama, she wouldn't be dancing with her girlfriend like that, let alone have the audacity to bring her as a plus one."

Your face must've given your surprise at this information as Seungcheol gestured towards a corner where your soulmate was giggling in her lover's arms, without giving two cents of the place and the people around her. She didn't care if people found it odd as to why she was dancing with her 'best friend' like that when she had her soulmate with her.

Ha! If only they knew!

You could only sigh at her carelessness and turn away from the sight. This would've broken your heart if only it beat for her. But your treacherous heart raced against your wishes for her brother.

It was as if he knew what was on your mind, for his frame finally melted for the first time since he caught you as he caressed your waist and continued swaying to the soft music, refusing to change partners even when everyone else was.

You tried to snatch your hand from his and leave but his grip didn't budge even a bit as he continued moving as if nothing happened.

"Seungcheol! Why don't you understand? Your sister wouldn't take this lightly."

He took a deep breath even as his eyes glistened with tears of helplessness at the situation and yours automatically mirrored his. You just wanted to love him, freely, without any inhibitions.

Why couldn't he be your soulmate? Yours didn't want you as it is. And he was born without one. You two were meant to be. Why couldn't the world understand? Why can't it be like that?

"Why can't we run away? You and I love each other then why do we have to hide? Why can't we be together?"

The vulnerability in his voice broke your heart. You want to give this man the world yet the one thing he asks of you is forbidden for you to bring him. Why can't you keep him happy like he keeps you? Is this why your soulmate doesn't want you? Because you're so helpless and hopeless?

"Cheol!"

You could only whisper his name and cupped his face in your hands, caressing his cheeks, hoping to provide him some soothe, albeit temporary.

"If we run away, your sister's soul trauma would make me hollow and you'd end up loving me all your life while I'd end up unable to love you at all."

You expressed the only concern that was holding you back, leaving you to tolerate his sister and her double standards. Seungcheol's body stiffened once again at the reminder as his eyes filled with contempt.

"The thought of loving you all my life doesn't sound unappealing to me. I hope you know that."

A smile appeared on your face, despite the cruelty of the circumstances as you continued stroking his cheek and his chest with your other hand, right where his heart was, hoping it'd send your love straight to his heart.

"I know but I'd rather love in secret than not love you at all. My life would lose its meaning if I were to stop loving you in the future. I only want you and would want you till I breathe my last."

A tear fell down his cheek that I instantly wiped, unable to stand it as his hand made its way to the back of my neck and caressed it, leaving only an inch distance between us, raising my panic again.

"Cheol! We need to stop. We can't be doing this here."

I pushed against his chest to make space between us but he held my hand above his heart and pulled me in by my nape, resting our foreheads against each other's.

"Please stay. Don't go. Not yet."

The doubt and fragility in his feeble voice cracked my resolve and I gave in to the comfort of his arms, closing my eyes, basking in his warmth.

"This is wrong Cheol. We could be in trouble. Or we already might be in one for all we know."

A statement even I wasn't convinced with came out in whispers, hoping he'd be the stronger one of us and push me away because I couldn't, not anymore.

"Then why does it feel right?"

And just like that, any protest that I had died out on my lips, always defeated by the one, same point. Because truly, why did it feel right? Why do we feel right? Why do we feel like we belong together? Why is it so natural to love Seungcheol when the world wouldn't approve of us. Even the fate hadn't.

"I wish I knew Cheol. What I do know is that no matter what, I'd always love you and only you. And I don't know what I'd done without you in my life. You're my saviour in every sense."

And I confessed because I wanted him to know: know that even if we were born for a future that didn't belong with each other in every lifetime, I would fight for him until I can't anymore.

That even though our fate had only brought us close enough to tease us, I'm glad that it did for I had a chance of getting to call him mine and be loved equally, if not more, by him. And I'd gladly do it all over again.

A gummy smile, that had my heart racing in giddiness, broke out on his gorgeous visage, as he planted a chaste kiss on my head.

"And I love you my chosen soulmate. There's no one I'd want if not you."

And he confessed because he knew we both wanted to hear it, now more than ever, when tomorrow isn't promised. He knew that as much as he wanted to say it to me, I had wanted to hear him say it because he was my strength.

A chuckle escaped me at the irony of the situation as he imitated my reaction. It was crazy; the whole situation, us, everything was bizarre, a mess, out of bounds; but it was ours. Wherever this was, our chaotic precious mess.

I'd have him in any and all forms that I can. If only I get to be loved by him.

It's a privilege to be loved by Choi Seungcheol, even if we weren't destined to be soulmates.

And it's a relief that in the face of my sham of a soulbond, I'd always have my raw and real lover by my side for the rest of our life.

©stayinhellevator2024: Please don't repost translate or copy my work on any platform.

Read On Wattpad

[kokomiin]

I didn't want to have to do this but I am currently being harassed by somebody I worked for with no sign of letting up, so here it is. Some of you might remember me working on an RPG called Moonatic since last month. I was contacted by this person in early December to be the artist for the game, after seeing how many people were working on it I decided to accept, but everyone involved was working out of goodwill under the promise that we would eventually be paid. I was encouraged by the director to work at maximum capacity every day, I am aware that I have an especially fast art output compared to some people, but this still takes work and energy as I am a human being. If I was only able to complete one piece in a day, he would comment on that being "a shame" and would point out if I finished my work day earlier than him due to exhaustion even if I had actually gotten things done. I kept working hard every day because I genuinely believed in the project and thought this kind of crunch wouldn't be permanent, and I didn't want to cause friction between myself and the director by complaining which I now realise was a huge mistake. Whenever I took a day off I had to announce it, there was no set schedule and I believe he would have me working every day if possible.

My friends can attest to the decrease in my physical and mental health before I even realised how I was being affected by this. The director also initiated a friendship with me as well as me being his employee, I accepted but over time personal boundaries were crossed, he made judgements about some things in my personal life and just two days ago, the day before I decided to resign, he implied a romantic interest in me knowing full well that I'm in a relationship. This was a breaking point for me and I had to reevaluate everything, after discussing with many people I decided it was best for everyone if I left. But when I gave the director my resignation, explaining to him the stress I was under and how I was uncomfortable with how he spoke to me, but that I would still let them use my work for the project, he immediately reacted with a mental spiral, blamed me for the project failing and even now still refuses to contact me directly.

A few weeks ago he insisted on purchasing a VR Headset for me, which I declined multiple times due to the cost and because I didn't ask for it in the first place, but around my birthday when he kept insisting I decided to accept, considering it my compensation for the month's worth of free labour I had done. I drew many character design sheets, environments, a comic, promotional artwork, helped to finish the trailer's storyboard and had begun animating it, with only a few days of breaks. I left the project because of stress and a lack of personal boundaries that were caused by him, and now this person is spamming me with payment requests to give him back the money for this gift. He claims it as a work tool, but when we talked about him getting it for me he treated the 'work' aspect as an excuse and said he really wanted to hang out with me in VR after work. Now he is declaring it as a work tool that needs to be repaid if not shipped back. A VR headset is not at all a necessary tool for this project, which is an RPG game developed in game maker.

I'm genuinely afraid about what else this person might do as he is blaming me for the project failing as though it was my own, and refusing to take responsibility for his treatment of me. If you are an artist, in the future please avoid any company with the name Andel in it. If I end up being forced to pay back the price of my free labour :') I'll open emergency commissions, ok?

screenshots under the cut (i'm pretty shaky right now so I forgot to add some, the ones related to my resignation have been added now)

[freshstartbaby]

SAME HEARTS, DIFFERENT PLACES.

Here I Come - Trevor Jackson

Romy was not having it. She was not feeling it at all. Her mood was decreasing to hell minutes by minutes. The night had began so good.

The brown woman decided to be daring for the New Eve night. She did the best brushing she could on her slick press natural hair. Romy took her time doing her make up by following step by step the tutorial she found earlier. Put on the red dress she always was afraid to wear because of her curves. She even had found the perfect heels to wear all night, embracing her feminity and being comfortable. She was feeling good and looking good. Who thought all the work she began earlier this year would have pay so much. Taking care of her mental et physical health was her biggest flex this year. And she was proud of it, as she should. Romy just wanted to enjoy the condo party with her friends, dance, sing, eat and drink. Was it too much to ask ?

She knew it was too much when she saw Florian greating people here in there after entering the place. That is why she hated party like that, you could never know who could be there and damn he was the last person Romy wanted to see tonight.

She find a way to escape the room before he could reach her area without making it too obvious. Once she got to the kitchen, she closed the door behind her and she settled, or hide as you rather, there for the next minutes. Pouring herself a drink she shook her head left to right. How the well could he be there ?

Romy had a friend, Patricia. They were kind of close. Close at a level that Romy did invite Patricia to her family house one summer. Patricia had a boyfriend, Florian, he was a nice person and a good looking man. Romy always found they were a cute couple and never engage the conversation with Florian without Patricia being the main topic. Matter fact, she was the type of girl bringing her man everywhere she was, so every time there was something planned he was there. It didn’t bother Romy at all, he was a cool guy and they liked making fun of each other. They were cool.

Until Romy’s relationship ended. When she was a single girl again, there was a switch in Patricia behavior. Everytime Florian was talking to Romy, Patricia felt this fear and rage in her stomach, like she was going to get played. In her side, Romy didn’t change anything, answering him when he was talking to her, clapping back when he tried to make fun of her. Everything was going well until Patricia took Romy grab a coffee.

Romy was hurted by the confession. Truly. From her pov, she didn’t crossed any line and never had bad attention towards them. She couldn’t believe her friend was thinking she could steal her man. She didn’t really know what was pissing her the most ? Her friend not turning to her boyfriend to handle the issue or the fact that she has becoming a potential treat since she was not in a relationship. Even if she stayed very calm and tried to understand her « friend », Romy was furious.

But it was ok, because Patricia was honest, show her true face and Romy naturally remove herself from this situation. At least she tried, Florian kept reacting to her posts, sending her messages, even invited her to his birthday. Did he had the same note ? She kindly decline everything. Even if he hadn’t do anything and she was missing him a little, she didn’t want to be this type of girl.

They bumped to each other at a party and Romy did her best to avoid any interaction. Florian tried to talk to her multiple times during the event but she was more than distant, not even looking at him directly during the few interactions they had. It left him a sour feeling for days.

One night Florian came to Romy’s place without any warning. More than surprised, she didn’t know if she could let him come inside, when he insisted that he will not be long. She let him a minute to cover herself and proposed him a glass of water, the redness of his cheeks was warning her, he was looking mad. Romy looked at him at the other side of the room.

Florian wanted to know if she would tell him if something was wrong. He could feel she was distant for months and from the conversation just had with his girlfriend, he totally understand why. He had a lot of affection for Romy, and for months, he felt pushed away by her. He had long nights wondering what he had done wrong.

« I thought we were friends, why you didn’t told me what happened ? » he said with a lot of deception in his voice.

Romy couldn’t believe it. Was him also going to blame her ? Goosebumps show up on her skin feeling the tone he was using. She didn’t know she could decepointed him and deeply she didn’t wanted to. But damn what was wrong with them two, was she the base of all their issues ?

« Ok first of all, you can not come at my place like that. Second, Florian you’re a nice guy but you are Patricia’s boyfriend, we’re just friend by affiliation. »

« Friend by affiliation ? «  he said laughing nervously at the sentence. Romy only nodded at his reaction discovering this side of him. « Your friend by affiliation is worried about you since this summer. Your friend by affiliation was wondering if he had done something wrong and was trying to be there for you. Romy I was truly worried about you. » Florian said again with concern on his face and walking toward her.

Now that he was less than a step from her, she didn’t answered just looked away. She was at her place, she couldn’t show any weakness. Even she deeply wanted to talk to him all this time, she wouldn’t let herself in that position.

« Look at me when I’m talking to you. » Florian said towing her and moving her head to face his grabbing her chin.

« Your girlfriend asked me to step back. That’s what I did ! Obviously she didn’t asked you the same thing ! » Romy said out of frustration, her voice got a little loud

« Do not scream at me. » he whispered not breaking the eye contact and squeezing her cheeks « Why didn’t you told me about that ? »

« Because.»

« Because what ?» he said motivated to have answers to all his questions

« Florian it is between me and Patricia ! » Romy said removing Florian’s hand from her face

« But it’s about me ! »

« So what ? Handle this with your girl ! »

« Oh yeah ? You want me to handle this with my girl ? »

« Exactly. »

« Like there is nothing going on between us ? » Florian said pointing at them.

Romy dismissed the last sentence, went to the fridge grabbing a bottle of water. She needed to stay hydrated for what was coming next. She was ready to burn him alive. She couldn’t believe he had the nerves to say that, out loud.

« Florian what are you talking about ? » she said putting her forearms on the kitchen island. This time her voice was collected. She didn’t want her emotions to have the best of her. They were on a touchy subject.

« I’m talking about us, being close, taking news, appreciating, supporting each other and teasing each other for like 3 years and you shutting it down without any valid explanation. You’re out there trying to make me feel like I’m crazy and making things up. What we had ? It was real.» Florian said sitting in front of Romy

« I never teased you. » she said wanting to be clear on that point

« Not in a sexual way. »

« What you need to understand, is that your girl think I’m going to take you away from her. And I think even before telling you anything, she blamed me. I was hurted. I took my distance. Period blank. »

« Period blank my ass. You took your distance from her and and from me. That’s not fair. »

« Florian do your ear yourself ? » she said squeezing her eyes.

« You are acting like you don’t care at all. Like I don’t matter to you. »

Romy looked at her hand on the island. She didn’t know what to tell or what to do.

The thing is, she didn’t have any love feelings for Florian. But once Patricia came at her, she rewind a lot of situations trying to see if she had done anything wrong. And the more situations played back in Romy’s head, the more she was questioning herself. Was she attracted to him ? Did she ever flirted with him ? Did she cared about him ? How would she had react if he ever made a move at her ? Why having news from him was so important during all this time ? She felt like the line between being friendly and more than that was blurring. She buried any inappropriate feelings she could have for Florian long time ago, for a good reason. And here he was saying all that scandalous things.

« Do I matter to you Romy ? » he asked soothing her

« Please Florian, don’t do that. »

« You matter to me. » he said taking one of her hand in his.

Florian left Romy’s place at the sunrise.

They talked all night. About so many subjects, how they felt, Patricia, Romy’s ex, their proper job, they had a lot to catch up after months without a real conversation. Florian didn’t have a real answer from Romy, but he knew he matted to her. Even if it was just a little portion, it was enough. He understood she wasn’t in a good position, it was maybe selfish of him but he didn’t want to let her go. Even if both of them valued loyalty at a very high level, the things Florian was feeling for that girl was messing everything up.

« You need to go Flo. » Romy said realizing what time it was.

He sat up, put on his jacket and touched slowly his beard « so wassup ? » Florian asked her really not knowing how it’s going to be

« What do you mean ? »

« You gon keep left me on read and avoiding me ? »

« There is no reason for us to keep contact Florian, I know you understand that. » Romy said trying to suppress the sorrow in her voice

Florian wanted to ask her if it was over. But he just nodded in acceptance realizing he wasn’t worth enough for Romy to change her mind.

« Give me a last hug. » Florian asked whispering.

Romy was staring at the sky through the window. If she gave him this hug, it was over. In less than 4 hours, he had waking up things she recklessly took months to hide. Florian stood her up on her feet, determined to have his hug.

Time stopped when his strong arms were locked around Romy’s body. He will definitely not be the one letting go first. He took the opportunity to smell her sweet unique essence a last time. When he pecked her right cheek, the skin was wet and salty. Romy wiped her cheeks rapidly not wanting to crack in front of him. Florian took his time looking at her pretty face before kissing her lips.

The shared kiss was caring and sincere, it turned way more sensual and needy in less than 2 minutes. Masks were falling hard. All the long speech were empty, they wanted each others. Romy stopped Florian feeling his hands touching her back skin underneath the sweatshirt she had put on few hours ago. She didn’t had the guts to go this far. He looked at her eyes a last time before kissing her forehead and left.

A year passed after that night. Romy didn’t tell about it to anyone. She kept it to herself kind of ashamed. She didn’t eared a word from Florian and she didn’t reach him either. But a lot of things happened. From what Romy eared, Patricia and Florian were over. Gossips was saying that Romy was the main reason. Street talks so much that she decided that if neither Patricia or Florian had the balls to confront her about that she will not even give it a chance to make it an issue. Approaching her 30´s Romy wanted something better for herself. She met two potential partners, it didn’t work out the way she wanted but it wasn’t a big deal. She had roof above her head, a job, was close to her family, had remove herself from nasty friendship, life was good.

The thing is, she wasn’t prepared to see Florian. Deeply she didn’t want to see him again. After all theses months, she understood that she had developed strong feelings for him and kept them on the low. Romy had this bad habit since middle school, used to be pushed away by guys she liked because of how she was looking.

Now, there they were, in the same place, one year after the scandalous kiss. She was panicking.

« Girl what are you doing in the kitchen ! You are missing all the bangers, I was looking for you when the DJ played Liquorice ! » Natacha, one of Romy best friends, said entering in the kitchen like a tornado « Hey you ok ? » she said once she saw the expression on Romy’s face.

She didn’t have the time to answer when Florian stepped in the room and looked at her. Romy’s mouth closed immediately. She could feel her heartbeat buzzing in her ears. She collected the energy she had and finally looked at him with a micro smile.

« Hi. » she waved

Natacha frowned at the simple word. The last time these too were in the same room, the mood was more light and warm. Now she felt like there was a unsaid tension and definitely felt like she should leave them. She found an excuse and left the room, letting Florian closing the door behind her. He came back toward Romy, sit on a chair near her and grabbed hers before pulling it closer to him. The motion made Romy shuttered before she exhaled deeply. She looked at him, taking her time. He was looking at her with his signature smile before licking his pink lips.

Romy’s eyes ran away another time and she quickly bite her inside cheek. For the small seconds she looked at him, she had the time to process how beautiful he was. His hair were freshly cut like always. He let his beard grow and blond hair were picking in it. Knowing him a little, Romy thought he would have wear an all black outfit for the night, but he had a immaculate white polar textured jacket on. The piece was giving him a warm aura and awaked a need of big hug inside Romy’s heart.

« Hi. » Florian finally said chuckling

« Why are you laughing ? » she asked

« It’s good to see you, I’m happy.» he answered passing a finger on his right eyebrow.

« Mmmh. »

« Are you happy to see me Romy ? » she nodded without any conviction, there he was again asking her things

« Mmh ? You were so happy to see me that you run away from the living room. » he said laughing before putting a chopstick in his mouth

« I did not runaway, I had to take a call. » Romy said laughing too. Yea using humor was going to save her tonight.

« Yea ? Who was it ? » Florian asked knowing she was lying

« My mum. »

« Oh my mother in law ? How is she ? » Romy couldn’t hold back but kissed her teeth earring Florian referring to her mum. It wasn’t funny. Taking few sips of her drink she decided just not to answer.

« I’m teasing you «  he continued feeling that Romy stoped talking « not in a sexual way » he said mimicking hisself saying the the same thing he told her a year ago.

Romy’s eyes grew bigger having the reference « YOU NEED TO-« 

« What are you drinking ? Could you pour me a drink ? » Florian said cutting her without giving her a chance to clap back. He was smiling and confident, only playing with his chopstick and keeping a strong eye contact with her.

Romy looked at him like crazy. Did he ate a lion before coming ? He was out of control.

« Are you drunk ? » she asked concerned, she wanted to know if he was just really bold or under any substance. He only shook his head right to left with a rise eye brow. He wasn’t drunk at all. He was just goin hard about how he really felt.

« Can I have a drink ? Please ? » he asked again

Romy turn back and face the island. She scanned the table looking for something he could like. She thought about rum coke but her eyes felt on a beer bottle. That’s what he will have. Grabbing the beer bottle she took a lighter on the island and opened the bottle like he taught her years ago. It was becoming natural now

« Mhhh, you still got the method. » Florian clapped is hands, remembering how much it was hard to learned that to Romy

Romy shook her head staying silent and giving the bottle to Florian before letting her back sticked the island.

He took a first sip looking at her before talking again « You look amazing, I love that dress on you. » he said taking her body entirely. Words didn’t need to be said about how he felt about her body.

Crossing her arms, Romy undid her motion and put her hands on the island still facing him. She needed to accept compliments she was receiving. So she replied a simple « Thank you Florian. » not that it didn’t affect her, but he was toying her more than she could handle tonight. She was already out of breath in her head.

« The backless, the color, you’re glowing, you put a red dress because you know it’s my favorite color right ? » he said laughing before taking another sip of his beer and wiking at her.

Romy wanted to roll her eyes but she frowned her eyebrows a second while crossing her arms.

« How are Flo ? » she genuinely asked.

Florian’s smile fade a little before he put down the beer bottle. He tried to put back a smile on his pink lips before sliding the chopstick between them again.

« Do you really want to know ? » he replied looking at her in a curious serious voice.

« I just asked you. »

« I don’t know, I’m not sure you really care about me. « 

Romy took her bottom lips between two of her fingers. He was mad at her. He was still mad at her since last time. She was the one who was supposed to be mad. But the tone he used didn’t sit well in Romy’s ear. She looked briefly at the closed door and took few step toward him.

She grabbed Florian’s hand how was on his left thighs and sat there looking straight in front of her. The warmth of his hand didn’t affected her because she was too nervous. His hand find naturally it way on her back, grabbing her slightly. He was kind of surprised about this move but he was willing to see where this conversation was going.

« You know I always mean what I say-«  Romy started still not looking at him

« Well it will be really sad if it was true.» he cut her again, removing his hand from her back to put one piece of hair behind her ear.

« And why that ? »

« Because you said I didn’t matter to you. »

« I never said that. » Romy said breaking the silence who took quickly place between them by grabbing his hairy chin and looking at him directly

« And you didn’t say it either. »

« Florian, how have you been ? Just answer the damn question ! » she said tired of this conversation, it was absolutely going nowhere

« I’m ok Romy. » looking away and chewing his chopstick

« That’s it ? You’re ok. Not fine. Not bad, just ok ? » Florian just nodded his head turning back his face to her but this time looking at her glossy lips.

« Well alright, I’m glad you’re ok. » she said playing with the fabric of his white jacket.

She should have moved at this moment. They had exchanged kind words, he was ok, that’s it. But the feeling of his hand on her back made it hard to move. She loved that feeling and tonight she just wanted to have a little taste of it. Florian noticed it and decided to draw little circles while asking her details about the year who just passed. He wanted to ear her talk, all night if she could.

He had to fight to stop staring at her lips or her cleavage more than twice. Florian day dreamed about feeling her tasty lips again, definitely more than twice. He had hard times trying to forget this kiss and truly he didn’t wanted to. He never share to anyone what happened between Romy and him a year ago. He knew too well that if the story was shared and deformed, she will be the bad guy. The last thing Florian wanted was to see Romy in a bad position.

He definitely wanted to see her in some position, but between closed doors and just for him. In fact, the only kiss they shared gave him guilty night fevers. Florian slowly touched Romy uncovered thighs and enjoyed the smoothness of them.

« You’re not even listening Flo. »

« I am. It’s been a while since I had you in my arms. I’m trying to enjoy the full experience. » he said moving her closer to him that she already was putting his face close to her neck

« Enjoying the full experience uh ? » Romy said with her right eyebrow rised

« Mhhh mhh. » Florian said smelling her. The motion and the feeling of his beard tickling her made a laugh. « See, I looked at you, I eared you, I just smelled you, I spend the last 20 minutes touching you » he said squeezing her back and thighs.

« Yep you’ve done it all. That’s a wrap » Romy said trying to get up feeling the tension raise a little higher than it already was.

« Come on you know one is missing. » Florian said just before pecking her neck briefly.

Romy didn’t remember when she started moaning. Was it when Florian was marking her with an hickey ? When his lips was on hers ? When his fingers grabbed the back of her head or found his way playing in her pantie ? She didn’t know. She didn’t care anymore. At least not at the moment.

Her heart was bitting so fast and Florian got her so wrap around his fingers that one of her hand was already teasing the growing bump between his legs.

Florian was on cloud nine seeing her willing to go further with him this time. It’s not like he was planning this to go this way, he didn’t even knew he was going to see her tonight. But the idea that there was no one between them now, letting them consume the need to be all over each other ? Chef’s kiss. He removed his right hand from her underwear and manage his fingers toward her plumped lips. Romy’s modesty was way too far now and she seductively wrap her mouth around his digits, tasting herself. Florian brain went numb a second thinking about all the things he could and would do to her, grabbed her chin before kissing her again-

« Ok girl now you need to get out that ki- « Natacha’s voice arrived at Romy’s ear, she jumped a little surprised and acting like child doing a bad thing « Oh okaaaaaaaaaaaay I’m out ! » she continued closing the door behind her.

Florian looked at Romy. She had her eyes closed and a little shy smirk on her lips.

« You know closing you eyes ain’t going to make you disappear right ? » he asked making fun of her after fews seconds dropped

Romy wanted to tell him to shut up but she just re opened her eyes chuckling. She met back Florian’s sparkling eyes. He was smirking too, slowly getting back to earth before giving her an hungry lick in on her neck sweet spot. There she was again letting pathetic sound escape her mouth. It wasn’t a big deal, she knew she could count on Natacha, and she was missing the feeling of his lips was already. Fuck Patricia, fuck trying to save apparences and fuck the old version of her. She got a taste of what she been craving for and now she was addicted.

-

Hi babes, don’t forget to double tap the post to give me the strength to write another story 🫶🏾

[xoxiu]

first love of late spring - ot7 x reader

chapter six table of contents masterlist join the taglist discord

summary: falling, falling, falling- that's what you shouldn't be doing as a young intern at hybe. falling in love with your supervisor is frowned upon, especially all seven of them. you'll never learn, will you? guess you’ll just have to be their dark secret.

tags/warnings: intern!reader, poly relationships, stockholm syndrome, age regression, spanking, drug use, sugar daddy au, dubcon, body dysmorphia

taglist: @frieschan

On album release day, you worked from home. Too many big thoughts invaded your mind whenever you stepped foot in the office- thoughts about the guys, in particular. You thought it best to avoid anything to do with them on their big day. 

Shaking your head, you couldn't stop thinking about them. They acted too nice, too kind, too friendly towards you. Never once did you think you deserved their affection. Yet, you found yourself yearning for it. The shy brushes of hands against each other. The way they would play with your hair, sometimes placing a soft kiss on your head. Taehyung had done that once while piss drunk, leaving you a quiet, blushing mess for the rest of the night. 

Above anything else, you wanted to be wanted. 

Your eyes wandered from the Social Blade page to your phone; it had been unusually quiet, especially considering what day it was. Picking it up, you scrolled through your contacts until you came across the name 'Min Yoongi'. You stared at the message icon for what felt like hours before sending a quick text. 

'congrats!! killer album man' 

You didn't expect an answer right away- they were all off doing promotions and whatnot. While the guys were off performing their newest single and filming other promotional content, you basically got the week off. Your workload had decreased dramatically to just "make sure everything is queued right" and it made you feel a bit guilty. Everyone was working so hard, except you. 

A ding from your phone eventually drew you away from your thoughts. 

'We just got done for the day, come by for the after-party tonight.'

After party? Why would you be invited to that? You accepted Yoongi's invitation with great thanks nevertheless. 

'That means stop by the dorm now.'

Ah. 

You quickly scrambled out of bed and started to put things into your backpack- your laptop, chargers, spare clothes, essentially an overnight bag. By now you've learned that if it was past 15:00 and you were invited over, you would end up staying the night. The choice was never really yours- you'd either pass out at some point or be forced to sleep on the couch by the time 22:00 rolled around. 

The dorm was less than a 5 minute walk away when your phone started buzzing again. You looked down to see it was Taehyung calling you. Quickly, you answered the call, hoping that plans hadn't been canceled at the very last second. 

"Hi, y/n! Are you coming over?" He asked, his deep voice full of excitement. You couldn't help but smile. 

"Yeah, I'm almost there now. What's up?" 

"We're planning on going out right now, so meet us outside the gates and we'll pick you up." Taehyung seemed to sense your confusion and discomfort and continued. "It's a small company party, so don't worry."

As expected, you could see Seokjin's car as you walked closer. Once you were spotted, the eldest waved you down. Taehyung stepped out of the passenger seat and opened the back door for you, trying his best to put on a chauffeur persona. You giggled as you were ushered into the expensive vehicle. 

"Where are we going?" You asked as you buckled yourself in. Taehyung never specified over the call, so you assumed it was a nice dinner out. 

"The club. Taehyung wanted to get wasted."

"Yeah!" Taehyung's enthusiasm confirmed Seokjin's claim. 

You didn't have much to say. Clubs weren't really your thing- it was too loud, had too many people, and was just too intense for you. Nevertheless, you didn't allow your own opinions to ruin the night for everyone else. 

The club was dark and strangely empty- you assumed the company bought it out for the night. It wasn't a traditional club- there was a bar and a dance floor with upbeat music and booths and tables to sit at. You noticed some coworkers enjoying a nice meal, while others were already settled at the bar. 

Everyone sat in a corner booth at the far end of the building. Jin placed a hand on your shoulder, attempting to lead you over to the table. Taehyung, however, immediately grabbed your hand and raced over to the bar. Before you could say anything, the older man was already ordering a plethora of drinks. 

A hand grabbed your wrist and led you away from the bar. It was Jimin, who was shaking his head in laughter. You slid in next to Hoseok, with Jimin sitting down next to you. 

"She's only been here a minute and Taehyung is already trying to get her drunk," Jimin joked. You looked around the table- a drink sat in front of everyone except Seokjin. That soon changed as Taehyung brought over another round of drinks. 

A red and orange drink was placed in front of you. You looked up at Taehyung with a smile, wanting to tell him you didn't drink much. He spoke up before you could collect your thoughts. 

"It's mostly orange juice, don't worry!" The word that caught your attention was 'mostly'. Still, you wanted to be grateful, so you took the drink. 

The atmosphere grew intimidating as time went on. More and more people entered, more drinks were had, and more hands seemed to touch you than normal. The boys were very touchy with each other, and those teasing touches soon included you. Jimin stroked your hair as he talked with the others, occasionally trying his best to braid it. For the most part, you just sat there, not saying much unless spoken to. 

All eyes felt like they were on you solely because you sat with the talent. Occasionally you would catch these glances- mainly female interns throwing the stink eye your way over how you were treated. Coworkers would come up to the table with shots for the members, and they would curiously glance at you. You were the outlier at the table, and people made it known. 

"I-I think I might go..." You said once you finished your second drink. Taehyung had lied- mostly something else in your drink made your head hurt. 

"No, don't leave me, y/n," Hoseok whined, grabbing your waist and pulling you onto his lap. You could smell the alcohol on him as he held you close. 

Everything faded as Hoseok held you on his lap- why weren't the others as shocked as you were? His arms were wrapped around your waist, and he was nuzzling your neck and no one was trying to stop him. You squirmed to try and go back to your seat, but Jimin took your place and Hoseok refused to let you go. 

"One more round and we'll head back to the dorms," Namjoon reasoned. Everyone seemed to agree, and when Jungkook returned with more drinks, you hesitantly took yours. You didn't want to ruin their special night, did you? 

You felt hot and clammy as the night went on. Between your stomach curling and your head pounding, you knew something was wrong. All you wanted to do was go home and rest. The conversation around you was a jumble of syllables and laughter, and all you could do was lean against Hoseok with your eyes closed. 

You felt him shuffle beneath you, making you open your eyes. The sudden movement only made you hurt more. You groaned out in pain as you were placed on your feet, and soon stumbled backward against the table. Seokjin picked you up off the ground, carrying you out to the car. Your head was a mess, but you could hear him and the others explaining to your coworkers how you had just drunk too much.

"Can you take me home, Jinnie? I don't feel good." You asked as Jin sat you down in the backseat of his car. He buckled you in with a chuckle and a simple response of 'later'.

————

"God, we want you so bad," Namjoon said. You sat straddling his lap, passionately kissing him. Nothing hurt and you were in paradise. 

"Take me, Daddy. God, take me, take me." You whispered in between kisses. Everything felt so good. 

A hand grabbed the back of your head, gently pulling you away from Namjoon. You looked up and saw Yoongi. 

"Joon, you know better than to do this while she's drunk."

"I'm not drunk," you playfully giggled at the accusation. "I'm completely sober."

"What's your name?" He asked you, still gripping your hair. 

"Yoongi." Yoongi sighed in response and let you go. 

"It's time to put her to bed."

[vaguely-yandere]

okay, listen up! my idea is absolutely genius and none can tell me otherwise! cliche, yes, but genius i say!

it’s an otome, BUT you can choose the “darling” you play as, which could increase/decrease the chances of a certain darling falling for you

i.e big bad, sensitive, girly yan have a high chance of falling for a more motherly darling while the chances of rival and f-boy yan falling for motherly darling is decreased (reminds them of their parents 🗿)

cryptid darling/worshipper yan is an easter egg. you gotta go in the source code of the game, change the player’s name to “cryptid,” and bam. this otome game has suddenly become a horror — not for you, of course, but for the people who come into the forest. worshipper yan only appears in this route, and you can find a lotta lore and character backstory like this

of course, there’s also the option to have a poly relationship with some. didn’t i mention an alliance with f-boy yan? who was it, sensitive, maybe?? that might only happen with a specific type of darling, though

i wonder just how many you could get, who you could get, before something real bad happens…

and some relationships would be completely blocked out if you chose some yans over others. chose girly yan? stoic yan’s now locked (i hc that they’re twins because why not and i feel like stoic yan’s not ok with kissing their twin’s lover)

oh, can’t forget about the outside world! you heard that a dog hybrid’s been attacking some townsfolk and some poor cat hybrid, might wanna be careful unless you get caught in one of the fights

and you gotta make money SOMEHOW, right?? there’s this real big company who needs employees. might be worth a shot (would get promos faster if in a relationship with f-boy yan)

choosing either f-boy or CEO locks out the other, for obvious reasons. you can only get CEO yan if you choose your darling to be older, which locks a LOT of options

or, you could choose to play in a different time period. since girly yan is younger housewife yan and i made them twins with stoic yan, those two and CEO yan are around the same age. i’ll… work on the timeline later

anyway yeah might make a fanfic outta this later idk

-poised darling

IM. IM IN LOVE. POISED DARLING, I AM GINGERLY KISSING YOU ON THE MOUTH (WITH CONSENT) CAUSE HOLY FUCKIN SHIT IM IN LOVE. UR MIND!!!!!!

and imagine you have your classic friends too and later on, depending on the route you take, you find out they were hired to befriend you and stalk you!!!!!! or, if you, the character, decide to be rude to them but only nice to your childhood friend, you become stalker darling and can see other playthroughs through that stalker perspective !!!!!

i also think certain darlings would be at disadvantages, like you said! motherly/nicer darlings would be avoided by rival yan and others but have a charisma buff, allowing them to get away with a lot more and be more likely to land their yanderes in prison if they so wish.

i also think like, if you flirt a lot with one yandere but then officially date another, there could be fights! physical, emotional, anything! rival yan would be more likely to drive someone to financial ruin, sensitive yan would be more likely to kill them brutally and decrease their sanity greatly, big bad would fight them, we all know what girly yan would do...

I also think itd be so cute if big bad and girly yan were related too! and they were raised by housewife yan, who taught them everything they know! i think that would give em a buff of some sort too, making it harder to escape them. i also think playboy yan would be CEO's kid! they gotta get all that money SOMEWHERE and i also like the idea of like, seeing some of the yanderes before they become, well, who they are now! like a young CEO yan being so young and like rude and mean cause theyre a spoiled kid (not actually) and then they just meet you and melt

and watching housewife yan slowly grow out of her more.. violent tendencies would be such a treat!!!

aaaaa this is such an amazing idea, i adore it!!!!!

[hiddenreflections]

bro I feel like I can talk about it now that cederic is halfway stable. but I have personally never experienced anything more scary than having an alter take over to specifically threaten and hurt somebody I loved and cared for. nothing makes you feel as out of control as..... your own body hurting someone you love. and you having like... zero control over it. its taken from your hands. youre just helpless. good guy aimed right for what would hurt me worst. cuz like as an alter he obviously had direct access to every little fear I had and everything I think would be the worst.

it was my perfect fucking nightmare for so many months.

there were days I locked myself inside the bedroom, stayed inside all day and avoided my boyfriend cuz I was scared of cederic taking over to threaten or harm him. I was in and out of psych wards both cuz of physical damages that had the possibility to cause lasting damages everytime to myself and bcz I was scared for my partner and didnt trust myself around ppl cuz an alter may try to attack someone or harm them physically.

I went from not having a history of violence, never even having thoughts or tendencies in that direction, to someone who could not protect the persons he loves most from herself. all bcz of an alter.

that fucked with me. tremendously.

but now????????????????????? its over????????? after all these months??? its over?? safety?? stability??? connection??? praise??

its just good now. I lost. like a lot. like this shit fucked with me. it sabotaged everything. I did not just lose a relationship lol.

like. ive heard of persecutors, but that that shit could fuck with you like that.

& I cant describe how fucking dumb and silly and pathetic I feel for being like, an alter hurt my partner and it was traumatizing and bad for me. like this is still my body that done did it lol. I still feel responsible, I still feel fucking guilty for it even if I had ZERO way of stopping it. .

like. we as a system did damage to this person psychologically too. my now ex bf basically had the girl he loved ripped from him within a single day, ever since the repressed memories came back and switches started to happen. and he held the trauma inside. like. idk what to do with that. we as a system literally hurt this person so fucking badly. cuz he was close to us and around us during that fucked up timespan. just cuz he was THERE and alters were so fucking aggressive. I feel like its my fault for not having had control over them.

he went from feeling so safe w/ me, hed fall asleep ten seconds after being in my arms to fearing just being in a room with me. like. our entire relationship was build on trust and mutual safety-giving. connection. intimacy. it was a deep and loving relationship. with enough faults. but still. he was the first person that actually loved me, not just obsessed over me. he was the only person I couldve imagined having children with. I loved him. I really did. Like. you wouldnt believe the lvl of trust and safety this person had in me for all these years weve been together. then the DID really starts becoming obvious and it all flows together. and its just... a decrease steady decline after that. with so much violent energy. so much psychological damage.

but for him its like? yeah. he saw the person he loved go from someone he knew, to someone hes deadly afraid of, someone he felt he hardly knew. fucking terrified whenever an alter fronted, cuz he always cud tell cuz our voice and body-language changes. all of it terrifying to him. understandably so.

its fucking scary to go from a person that never acted or felt violent, to someone who has like alters switch her out and take over to act violent, to be out of control. and you know somewhere its your responsibility, cuz it just is. its still your body doing it. you know? even when youre completely blacked out.

& I think psychologically that was so fucked up for him.

Just to see the girl he loved being ripped away from him, the hatred he felt for my alters. the sheer fucking grudge he had against them. up until he had to accept being w/ me wasnt possible anymore. and I wanted that breakup ever since alters started acting out, ik I was shit for him to be around.

Idk man. Ive been w/ that guy since I was 17 years of age. He was a major part of my life. and im HAPPY about the breakup. cuz I didnt wanna stay w/ him after we done all that. I think it doesnt fucking matter if a alter did it or I did it. as soon as theres violence, its over. no excuses. so im glad it ended.

but like all of it was so fucking fucking fucking mental.

And now? I somehow got it under control. somehow its no longer even a worry.

I got control back. cederic is no longer rlly acting out. and if then its only aimed at me.

I made it out. I made it thru it. I survived it.

and now?? i have like. someone in my head with me still cheering me on, no longer butting in and trying to take over my body. no longer using all the horrible ways he could miuse us sharing a body to cause harm. now its becoming peaceful and pretty and serene. and comfortable. and connective and loving.

who wouldve thought man.

just a positive little guy in my head that cheers me on, that is there for me, that listens, that grounds me when I have flashbacks, that cheers me up, that tries to help me. that compliments me. praises me.

just a damaged person learning to be better.

[limerental]

ficletober 2022 day 22 - trissbert ft. yennskier (and background relationships)

It's a less than peaceful morning at Kaer Morhen with Triss and Lambert up to their usual bickering. Except not everything is as it seems.

aka just a really self-indulgent, ambiguous canon, they all lived in KM like it was 2020 nonsense fic.

Mornings at Kaer Morhen were ordinarily a subdued affair, the groggy residents of the keep struggling to shake off the winter sluggishness. The sun never quite rose over the crags of the mountains, and shadows loomed in the poorly-lit halls. No one quite had the energy for rousing arguments and wrestling matches until at least noon.

Except, it seemed, Triss and Lambert.

"Nitwit," Triss hissed under her breath, leaning toward him across the table. "Muttonhead. Dullard."

"Are those the best insults you know, Merigold?" drawled Lambert at what he seemed to think was decreased volume. "You learn those at your little rich girl witch school?"

"It's not a– I know plenty more insults than that, you peabrain."

"The best you've got is piss for brains?"

"Peas, you insufferable Witcher. Peas!" Her cheeks were flushed red. "The vegetable. Though perhaps you're unfamiliar. Your cuisine seems to suggest so."

"If you're so displeased with our slop, why don't you slither back to your banquets?" He dug a heaping spoonful from her bowl of groats and shoved it in his mouth, comically full cheeks somewhat ruining his smug expression.

Triss made a disgusted noise as he smacked his lips loudly, chewing with his mouth open.

"What's happening this time?" Geralt grumbled to Eskel from the other end of the table, both of them considering retreating to distant parts of the keep. Yennefer and the bard had yet to show, and Vesemir woke early enough to avoid all of them and had already disappeared into his study. 

"They were shouting at each other in the hall last night," said Eskel, slumped over a bowl of steaming groats.

"About?"

"Something stupid, probably. What are they on about now? Fruits?"

Triss and Lambert had given up on hushed morning tones and devolved into a full-blown argument.

"A potato is not a fruit by any metric, you imbecile."

"It's round. It's got skin. Comes from a living thing. Fruit, Merigold."

"A tuber," says Triss with decreasing patience, "is not a fruit. And that definition is nowhere near--"

Lambert is busy listing things that are fruits on his fingers.

"Tomato, cherry, apple, melon, potato, bezoar–"

"Bezoar?!" Triss' voice reaches an alarming pitch.

"Well, I mean. Technically. You harvest them from a living thing. People spend a lot of money for them. They're round. Fruit."

"Not even by your own definition does that make any–" 

"Sometimes not everything's all neat and tidy little boxes, Merigold."

"A bezoar is not a fruit."

"An egg is a fruit."

"You are insufferable. Intolerable. You're–"

Geralt and Eskel had shuffled farther away down the table from the discussion, leaning into one another to whisper.

"This is worse than usual," said Geralt, brow drawing together. "Do you think we should intervene?"

"Be my guest," said Eskel. "But Triss is wielding that spoon like she's a second from scooping out somebody's eyeball, and I don't think she'd discriminate."

"Probably right," grumbled Geralt. He stared into his bowl. "Is… an eyeball a fruit? By Lambert's definition."

Eskel stared at him. 

Lambert and Triss, meanwhile, had escalated to a full-blown tiff, complete with exaggerated gestures and pinched facial expressions. Their faces were flushed beet-red.

The bard chose that moment to enter, looking artfully disheveled in a way Geralt knew he perfected in the mirror before leaving his room. He took one look at the arguing pair and wrinkled his nose in displeasure.

"Augh, already? Isn't it too early for catfights?"

Yennefer was not far behind Jaskier, looking pristinely unruffled. Also perfected in the mirror before leaving her room. She regarded the scene before her, eyes narrowing.

Saying nothing, she ladled a bowl of groats from the pot, sprinkled it with dried apple, and settled beside Eskel at the table. Jaskier flopped half in her lap, nearly unsettling her bowl, and she flicked him in the temple.

"Sit your bony backside somewhere else, you little jester," she said. 

"Ow," whined Jaskier, wiggling headfirst into her lap instead. "What's their deal, then? Woke up on the wrong side of the cold, dismal slabs you people call beds?"

"They're fucking," said Yennefer mildly. "They're having sex."

A chorus of disbelief rose from their end of the table, and Triss and Lambert sputtered in protest, both deepening to a further shade of red.

"As if I would ever–"

"You don't know what you're–"

"With this absolute buffoon of a–"

Yennefer rolled her eyes.

"If they haven't yet, they would like to. You're not anything approaching subtle," she said. "Both in the other's space incessantly. Insults used as endearing little nicknames. Bickering as a form of flirtation. Barely withheld lust in your heated tirades."

She ran her hands through Jaskier's hair as she spoke. The whole table stared.

"It does seem fairly suspect," the bard said, yawning. "Everyone knows the inherent eroticism of–"

Yennefer flicked him again, even as she sctatched at his scalp.

"Pipe down. The adults are speaking."

"There's nothing–" Lambert makes a vulgar gesture. "--eroticist about anything happening here."

 "It's erotic, you dunce," Triss huffed.

"Ah, so you're admitting it."

"No!"

"Blatant admittance there."

"Yep, clear as day."

"Geralt?" Jaskier asked. "What's with the very intense broody thinking face? Have I got cobwebs in my hair again? If any of you ever got out a broom, that wouldn't happen, now would it? What are you staring at?"

"Fuck," Geralt said. "You two are–"

Eskel cackled, slapping him on the shoulder. "And he's got it. Only took him a damn month."

"Got what," said Lambert.

"It's obvious," huffed Triss, still very pink. "They're–"

"Fucking," said Yennefer with a tug on the bard's hair.

"Is that all that our indecorous, clandestine union is to you, my wretched lady of the night?" Jaskier pouted.

Lambert gagged. Triss blushed. Geralt had turned a weirder shade of grey than usual. Eskel thunked his head against the table and continued to cackle.

Then, Ciri appeared in the doorway, her hair a wild rat's nest of bedhead, scurrying into the hall with a suspicious look.

"Is there no training today?" she asked. "No one came to wake me."

"Aha, you little twerp." Lambert grinned. "Finally admitting you pretend not to know how late it is."

Ciri planted both elbows flat on the table and leaned her chin on them, her expression overflowing with cheeky, ev glee.

"My room's next door to Triss," said Ciri. "I could tell everyone here what I was forced to overhear last–"

Geralt recovered from his afflicted state in no time, hostility palpable in the air. Lambert leapt back from the table at once.

"To the training yard, girl!" he barked. "Last one there shuts up and never mentions this again."

Ciri dove into a sprint, bounding over the casual leg Triss stuck out in an attempt to trip her, and Lambert followed at speed, Geralt shouting after them with both hands on his hips.

"Ha," said Eskel, shaking off his last snickers of laughter. "Speaking of catfights. Wait 'til she meets Lambert's other half. Bound to get ugly."

Yennefer hummed. "One of the most powerful sorceresses on the Contininent has her on a leash," she said. "Lambert should worry, if anything."

"Or," said Jaskier with a wagging finger, "they all agree to a polite and agreeable polyamorous arrangement where all parties consent to a communicative, open arrangement and all are wholly emotionally and physically satisfied."

The four remaiming in the hall stared at one another.

Several hours later, Vesemir braved a return to the great hall to prepare lunch. He stopped in the doorway, sighed deeply at the indecent sight before him, and turned on his heel to dissappear back into his study.

Perhaps he could get away with staying in there until spring finally came.

[hpowellsmith]

Hi! I wanted to ask, is there a way to avoid losing 16 relationship points with trevelyan in the scene where the answer options are something like that:

1. Are you trying to probe me for information?

2. I think suffrage will happen. Parliaments weak

3. I'm sure the parliament will do what's right for the country

No matter which option i pick, it always results in Trevelyan being unhappy with the reply and losing these points. Is is so many points on purpose, and is there some kind of stat check all of these answers have?

These do indeed have stat checks!

Because of the way stat increases and decreases work, it isn't always such a high change - it will be a smaller increase/decrease if you're at lower levels, and a bigger increase/decrease if you're at higher levels.

That said, once the full first draft of the game is done, I'm planning to look at the interpersonal conversations and reducing difficulty or removing some of the stat checks because I want to give more flexibility for the MC about expressing themself without worrying about their stats (though characters won't like everything the MC says of course!). This conversation may end up being one that I tweak.

Thank you for the ask!

Spoilers for this stat check below:

-"Are you probing for information" is successful with Underhanded 35+

-"Parliament is weak" is successful with Authoritative 35+

-"Parliament will do what's right" is successful with Appealing 35+

[punk-pins]

had a really bizarre experience today. cw political conspiracy theories and the racism/antisemitism/islamophobia that entails + homophobia/transphobia. long post, kind of rambling, it’s almost 3am, might delete later.

long story short I was in a situation where I was in a gathering of 4 adult (40s-60s), white, moderately wealthy trump republicans. one of which was my father, a woman who is an acquaintance of my father, and the other two were a couple. my father is a trump republican from the economically conservative side– he’s not on twitter, he like watching the stock market ticker on fox news, he likes the idea of trump as a political outsider. (our relationship is strained for it, and we avoid discussing it.) the woman was a trump republican from the side of so-called culture war– she expresses her views online, she thinks the american youth are devolved from her generation, her husband is a retired police officer so she has a lot of opinions about racism in america.

so obviously this group got to talking politics. this was not a conversation I wanted to participate in, but they were adamant they wanted my participation in it, and I wasn’t in a place where I could leave or refuse without causing larger issues. I was calm, I was safe enough to disclose my views come from being a lesbian, and in general I tried to respond as neutrally as possible.

the woman in particular told me directly, multiple times, how I only hold my opinions because I’ve been indoctrinated. she said “indoctrinated” so many times, it was just absolutely bizarre to say that to someone’s face. she repeatedly interjected that she wanted me to feel safe to share my opinions with her, that she didn’t want me to feel ganged up on, while insisting I wasn’t at fault for anything I said because I was indoctrinated.

in this conversation, I was asked if I believed in the “lgbtqia,” because “there are gay people who don’t believe in it, you don’t have to join,” as if it’s an organization. someone offhandedly mentioned “the transsexual issue.” they discussed a conspiracy theory that obama could have destroyed all racism in america in 2008, but instead allowed an islamic brotherhood to come into the white house take over all foreign policy. that obama still controls the current biden administration as a puppet master. they held a firm belief that the younger generation dislikes capitalism from pure laziness and entitlement.

when I said a lot of younger people don’t see themselves settling into economically conservative views with age because they don’t see the opportunities to gain wealth afforded to previous generations, the couple proudly told me about how they earned everything they had by working through college and getting good jobs. in the same breath, they also told me their daughter (my age) had never worked a day because of her indoctrination, and will be graduating college with what’s basically a mortgage in debt. I said exactly, you were able to pay your way through college and enter the workforce, but that’s impossible for your daughter to do because of increased cost + stagnating wages, plus her degree is now a requirement for entry level corporate work, not a bonus, so she will have a harder time accumulating wealth. they laughed it off because they’re convinced the situation is a moral failing on their daughter’s part, and doesn’t reflect on american economics or their parenting at all.

when it came to gay indoctrination in schools, I said well a hundred years ago left handed students were beaten for not using their right hand, and so all students were right handed. a decrease in anti-gay violence allows more students to express and experiment with how they want to be. it’s not that there’s an explosion of gay people since you were in school, they just weren’t safe to come out before. that bit sort of got through a little, but they were insistent that are “new identities” being pushed onto kids, and how could anyone ever want to be anything but straight? I would’ve lost my shit if we really got into it on these ones, but thankfully the topics shifted.

it was just one bizarre “why would you ever say this to another person in real life?” moment after the next. like are you willfully stupid or do you actually think your generation solved all problems in the world when you decided to settle down, and now everything else is extraneous nonsense made to make you look bad? do you really think your sheltered opinions matter on intercommunity issues? do you not understand how insane and rude and entitled you sound? I never expected or desired to change any of these people’s minds on anything, I was just trying to get through the interaction walking the tightrope of asserting myself so I wouldn’t hate myself after and not devolving into argument that would be counterproductive to the bigger situation going on.

the interesting thing is though, my dad didn’t say a word throughout the entire discussion. I know he agreed with them on a lot of points, but he never spoke against them, or to defend me from pointed comments made towards me. and after, when he was apologizing that it got political, he said he didn’t say anything because he was hoping they would stop. he didn’t try to change the topic, he didn’t speak up for me, he just let it happen, and apologized that it “wasn’t a safe space” for me after. and I think that’s really telling about trump republicans in general. his disapproval was entirely silent because he was not willing to speak against the others on any particular point, even the insane shit, even when it was hurting someone he loved directly in front of him, because that would destroy his credibility in the eyes of the other trump republicans. it really is a fascist fucking movement.

[shortblackk]

Repairing a toxic relationship can be complex and difficult.

It can be done, but by the time most people realise their relationship has turned toxic, it's too late...

But identifying if you're in a toxic relationship can be even more difficult because it's hard to see it when you're on the inside.

There are many traits and many faces of a toxic relationship.

A beautiful relationship can turn toxic even when there's still love.

The lack of trust and respect begins to turn into anger and resentment.

A toxic relationship is when they always bring up your past mistakes and continue to judge you and punish you for them even though you've taken steps to fix things.

A toxic relationship is when they show no empathy towards you and don't care about your feelings or the way they make you feel.

A toxic relationship is when they constantly break your trust, breach your privacy, and knowingly do things that are disrespectful towards you and that they know upsets you.

A toxic relationship is when they are selfish and self centered; everything is always about them.

A toxic relationship is when they want you to make them a priority but they won't treat you like a priority in their life.

A toxic relationship is when they won't communicate with you and when they do, they don't communicate with any sort of level of emotional maturity.

A toxic relationship is when they never apologise or take accountability for their mistakes or wrong doings and they make everything your fault by deflecting, blame-shifting, projecting, and turning things around to make you feel guilty for something they've done.

A toxic relationship is when they neglect and manipulate you by deliberately withholding what they know to be your love languages; such as giving affection, spending time together, and communicating openly, honestly, and effectively.

A toxic relationship is when they constantly put you down, make you feel worthless, and tell you that you're not capable.

A toxic relationship is when everything you do right is negated by that one thing you do wrong; they will continue to remind you of this over and over. They will make out like everything you ever do is wrong and you can't ever get anything right.

A toxic relationship is when they make you feel guilty for bringing up how you feel or how they upset you, they always turn it into and argument and blame what they did on something that you did.

A toxic relationship is when you don't feel emotionally safe, and you're too scared to express how you really feel because you know they will become angry and defensive instead of acknowledging what they did and trying to make things better.

A toxic relationship is when they deliberately hide things from you or do things behind your back. They do this in a secretive and deceptive manner to avoid you finding out what they're really up to.

A toxic relationship is when they have deteriorated your support network, restricted or significantly deteriorated your finances, and their abuse has deteriorated your mental health.

A toxic relationship can cause a significant decline in both your mental health and your physical health.

A toxic relationship will increase your depression, anxiety, fear, anger, stress; and decrease your happiness and feelings of self-worth, confidence, and self-esteem.

The way you feel is important.

The way someone makes you feel is important.

If someone really loves and and really cares about you, and they value the relationship; they will work together with you to make things better again.

But if someone doesn't respect you enough to make you feel respected, safe, heard, and loved; they've already shown you what you mean to them.

And if that's the case, then don't waste your heart, your tears, and your health on them any longer...

[calacuspr]

PR 101: Pitching your story to the media

Pitching your story to journalists and media outlets is an effective way to generate exposure and awareness.

But with the media overworked and under-resourced, it’s easy to make mistakes that can prevent your story from being covered.

Here are our top tips to avoid pitching pitfalls:

A strong release

It’s really important that your press release is strong.

Follow our tips in the link above to get your press release format just right and make sure that the story you are telling is both compelling, relevant and newsworthy.

That will give you half a chance.

The wrong media

Here at Calacus, we often hear horror stories from journalists who have been invited to cover a story that is entirely irrelevant to their publication or specific area of expertise.

Make sure you have done your research, about the journalist and their media organisation to understand their beat and the type of stories they cover.

Failing to do this research can lead to irrelevant pitches that waste the journalist's time and decrease the chances of getting coverage now or in the future.

Timing is everything

Timing is everything when selling-in your story.

Failing to consider the timing and relevance of your pitch can lead to missed opportunities.

For example, pitching a story about a product launch or a new sports event after launch is unlikely to generate interest.

Similarly, pitching a story that's not relevant to current events or trends is unlikely to be picked up.

When it comes to embargoes, while most media will adhere to them, never, ever be tempted to give a favoured journalist the story as an exclusive in advance unless you are prepared for the possible backlash that comes with the territory.

Journalists have deadlines and are often under extreme pressure to get their stories written in good time. If you call them or send them a story on deadline, they are likely to ignore you, possibly blacklist you and even perhaps embarrass you on social media.

Personalise the pitch

Sending out generic, one-size-fits-all pitches rarely work unless your story is so big that the media are breaking down the door to get the news.

If your pitch doesn't stand out, it's likely to get ignored, so personalise it by referencing their past articles or including a specific angle that you think will excite them.

Even if your story is not for them right now, building strong relationships with the media means that they are more likely to come back to you or cover your stories in future.

Follow-up fury

While the media often complain about being chased when a story has been sent to them, not doing so means it’s even more likely that your story will get lost.

Following up with a polite email or phone call can help keep your pitch top of mind and increase the chances of it being picked up.

[mercanstalks]

Outsourced Payroll Providers: Top 5 Benefits

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 Engaging, too, is the survey that 97% consider payroll information as a fundamental idea in cost affiliation methodologies, with 87% investigating payroll as an urgent piece of their business and improvement targets. Re-appropriating your overall payroll relationship to a recognized outsider expert is an essential piece of this cycle. Why? Moving to the right as a rule affiliation provider invites with it many benefits that on-premise plans can't contact.

Benefits of outsourcing

19% of respondents found that recalling for house techniques began their business up to face a challenge while endeavoring to coordinate consistency themselves. This figure drops to just two percent for affiliations re-appropriating their overall payroll.

A versatile, cloud-based, joined methodology made with your business. Dependably it pays staff in a decent, steady, and talented way, giving overall payroll worldwide payroll suppliers Canada plans changed to neighborhood needs, got along with single view multi country payroll data for extra sharpened bits of information, and payroll experts to keep you reliable.

A survey worked with by Forrester Guiding for ADP found that the overall relationship with ADP's overall hr & payroll outsourcing plan saw a 134 percent benefit from the hypothesis, a lessening in payroll managing crafted by up to 75 percent, and avoidance of consistency costs of $1.8 million. There are so many overall payrolls dealing with relationships for your reference.

Why use an overall payroll affiliation provider?

Re-appropriating your overall multi country payroll outsourcing saves significant time by supporting your authoritative obligations, decreasing your consistency risk, further making deftness, and helping you with filling any cutoff openings without the cost of overall payroll supplier Switzerland. Joined with that, a worked-overall payroll process that is converged with your HR and cash structures diminish whimsies, yet next to lessening costs, for example, paying for silly programming.

As shown by a 2023 EY Overall Payroll Study, 65% of HR and payroll pioneers agree that an overall vehicle model would pass enormous benefits onto their associations. Buyers of an overall payroll associations provider saw north of 32% ordinary save assets from process smoothing out, over 20% hold maintains through payroll services in Switzerland, and a 50 percent resource decline from additionally created viability.

The onus is on affiliations now to experience each second unbounded and make an overall payroll structure that is deft and versatile enough to deal with any coming. Overall international payroll services, whether another thriving or cash-related crisis or the new best overall payroll suppliers.

Bottom line

With 60% of payroll specialists agreeing that a truly broad payroll model would help their association, everything is great and well to make a vital occupation for payroll, moving it from the regulatory focus to clear. This can help with driving the business forward - rather than keeping it above water.

Browse more: 

Ultimate Guide For Payroll In 2023

Things to Consider When Outsourcing Payroll Providers

What Do Payroll Outsourcing Companies Do?

[just-another-blog-of-fluff]

Admit It

Word count: 3,550

Pairing: Steve x reader (platonic), Bucky x reader (pre-dating romantic) - no pronouns used

Warnings: Just a lot of fluff

Vacation for me means catching up on some prompts! This Prompt from an anon requests Steve and Bucky x reader, where reader is crushing on Bucky and Steve helps them to admit it to him. I think I successfully avoided any pronouns in this to keep it completely neutral! Hope you enjoy 😊

“Gonna have to run faster than that to keep up with me!”

“If you didn’t have that damn super soldier serum in your blood, I’d be smoking you right now.”

Your sneakers pounded against the pavement as you ran along the sidewalk, matching pace with the super soldier at your side. Steve was obviously not exerting his full capability. It would defeat the purpose of doing these morning jogs together if he was always a few miles ahead. That didn’t stop him from teasing you about it, though.

“Nah, I’d be faster than you with or without the serum.”

“You’re lucky it’s impossible for us to ever find out.” You slowed your pace as you approached the turn onto your street, walking the remaining distance to your house to allow your heart rate to decrease before stretching out. “It’s the only reason you mouth off about how much better than me you are at everything.”

“Yeah, yeah. Keep telling yourself that.”

Steve was barely winded by the time you stopped in front of your door. You knew very well these runs were probably not much of a workout for him with the super serum - he just came so he could spend time with you as his close friend. Or maybe because he liked pushing your buttons. Either way, you enjoyed his company.

You began leading a quick stretch in the front yard to cool down. Steve followed suit, copying your movements as you grabbed one ankle to stretch out your quad muscles.

“We still on for drinks tonight?” you asked.

“Of course. Still want to go to the pub down the street from the compound?”

“Yep. You know I like the familiar.” You switched legs to stretch the other quad. Trying your hardest to act casual, you asked, “So… are you dragging Bucky along again?”

A smirk pulled at your super soldier friend’s lips. “I can, if you want me to.”

“I was just curious. Doesn’t matter either way.”

“Sure.” He lowered himself to the ground to follow you into a hamstring stretch. “That’s why you’re always asking if he’s coming.”

“I like to know ahead of time if it’s just gonna be you and I or if other friends will be coming.”

“Why? So you can make sure you get all dolled up for him if he’s tagging along?”

Your face flushed with heat. “No, of course not.”

“You know… you could just tell him you like him.” Steve nudged you with his elbow, wiggling his eyebrows teasingly. You gasped indignantly.

“Do not!”

“Oh come on. You have a huge crush on him! It’s so obvious, it’s painful.” He stood and held a hand out to help you off the ground, which you accepted with a begrudging look. “You guys would be cute together.”

“I’m not continuing this conversation,” you griped, waving him off dismissively. “I’m gonna go in and shower. See you tonight?”

“Sure, see you tonight.” He stepped toward his car in your driveway as you inserted your key into the lock on your front door. “But I know you’re deflecting!”

“Not listening!” you shouted back, not turning around as you stepped inside and shut your door behind them.

Steve had been your assigned mentor from the day you joined SHIELD. You had hit it off immediately, developing a strong mentor-mentee relationship that had carried over into a close friendship once your training was complete.

Tony had offered you housing in the tower, but you opted to remain living on your own. Being such close friends with Steve, you spent quite a bit of time in the tower anyway. It was nice to still maintain a bit of your own space when you felt like you needed it.

It hadn’t taken very long for you to develop a crush on Steve’s metal-armed friend. Bucky was mysterious, brooding, sarcastic. Insanely attractive. He had a great sense of humor, always making you laugh with his snarky little comments, usually at Steve’s expense. And the way he smiled at you when he said hello, or chuckled when you were the one who said something funny… damn, it sent your heart racing.

You knew that the way you were starting to feel about Bucky was more than just a simple little crush, but you were way too nervous to admit it. Steve would tell him in a heartbeat if you ever owned up to your feelings, so you wouldn’t tell him the truth either. Not that it mattered - Steve saw right through you. He’d figured it out a long time ago by the way you stared just a little too long at the sergeant.

There was a giddy excitement bubbling in the pit of your stomach as you got ready to head to the pub that evening and meet the guys. Maybe you spent a little extra time picking out your outfit. Steve didn’t need to know that. With a last once-over in the mirror, you grabbed your keys and headed out.

Steve had already arrived by the time you got to the pub. He’d nabbed a seat at the bar, reserving one for you. On his other side sat Bucky, who turned and waved to you with that handsome smile of his that made you swoon internally.

“You made it!” Steve declared, standing up under the ruse of giving you a hug in greeting. “Here - we saved you a spot.” He gestured toward the seat he was in before, moving to take the empty seat next to it.

“O-oh, I’m not stealing your seat, am I?” you stammered anxiously, realizing he intended to seat you between the two men.

“‘Course not!” Steve assured, taking a seat before you could protest. The sly grin on his face was infuriating.

You slid into the open seat, nodding and smiling politely at Bucky beside you. “Hey! Long time no see.”

“We saw each other Wednesday,” he countered with a grin.

“W-well… that’s a long time compared to when I last saw this one,” you retorted, jerking your thumb toward Steve.

"Hey, you don't have to live with the guy," Bucky quipped.

"I'm right here you know," Steve interjected. You rolled your eyes.

"Desperate for attention, this guy..."

Steve shoved your shoulder playfully, nearly pushing you into Bucky in the process. You were fairly certain it was on purpose.

The three of you ordered drinks and put in for a shared appetizer as you chatted. Neither Steve nor Bucky could feel the effects of standard alcohol with the super soldier serum, so you usually kept it to one drink yourself. Who knew what you'd say if you got drunk around those two? You had no desire to find out.

"So how goes life at Avengers tower?" you asked as you scooped a nacho off the top of the plate in front of you.

"Tony hired a new secretary for the lobby," Bucky explained, wiggling his eyebrows as he glanced over you at Steve. He rolled his eyes in response

"I told you, she's not my type."

"Oh, come on! She gives you the eyes every time you walk by!" Bucky argued.

"She's in her 70's!"

"Great! A younger woman," you ribbed, smirking at Bucky as he laughed.

"Ha, ha. You shouldn't be laughing, Buck - you're older than I am."

"Yeah, but I'm way more good looking," he retorted teasingly, running his fingers through his own hair for emphasis.

"No you're not!" Steve turned to you, a shadow of a smirk on his face. "Let's ask a third party. Which of us is better looking?"

You felt heat prickle in your cheeks. "Oh, hell no. I'm not answering that question. That's a trap."

"Oh come on, you know you want to tell Steve the truth," Bucky teased, draping his arm around your shoulders. You had to stifle a nervous giggle, tilting your chin down to hide the giddy grin that spread across your face.

"Nope. You guys will have to find someone else to settle this for you."

Bucky scoffed, removing his arm from your shoulders. "Pshh, you're no fun." You felt suddenly colder without his touch.

"So... find someone that's your type yet?" Steve asked you pointedly.

"N-nope. Just living the single life," you responded casually, turning your head fully toward Steve and shooting him a dirty look.

"There's not one person in your life you'd be interested in going out with?" Steve pressured, ignoring your scowling. "I don't believe that for a second."

"Excuse me, you're my mentor, not my wingman Steve," you grumbled, popping another nacho in your mouth to have an excuse not to speak any longer. He shook his head with a smirk, his knowing gaze fixed on yours for just another moment. You took the opportunity to change the subject after you'd swallowed your bite of food. "So, anyway - how is Tony?"

You could tell Steve didn't want to drop it so easily, but Bucky had already started to answer your question, and the opportunity was lost. Gradually, you began to relax again as the conversation strayed further from your crush.

As the three of you finished paying the tab, you stood from your bar stool and prepared to say your goodbyes. Steve, however, had a mischievous look in his eyes that said he hadn't quite given up on forcing your hand this evening. Before you could bid them good evening, he spoke up.

"Hey - we finished up pretty early, why don't you come hang with us for a film or something?" he suggested. "It'd be fun - just you, me and Buck. What do you say?"

"Oh, I-"

"Yeah, that sounds great, actually! It's been a while since you came over just to chill," Bucky interrupted before you could politely decline. "Cap's always got you working when you stop by."

How could you say no?

"Well... I guess I don't have anywhere to be tomorrow... I could hang out for a bit," you obliged, flashing Steve a glare behind Bucky's back as you headed out to the parking lot. He merely responded with an impish grin. He knew he'd successfully cornered you.

"Great! Meet you there, then?"

"Yup, see you there," you said through gritted teeth, faking a smile. As you ducked into your car and shut the door, you muttered under your breath to yourself. "Damn you, Rogers..."

And so, you found yourself begrudgingly seated on the sofa between the two super soldiers in the lounge of the tower. Not that you minded being this close to Bucky, of course. But that didn't change the fact that you were still bitter with Steve for trying to coax the truth out of you.

"Hey, Buck - you mind making a bowl of popcorn while I get this thing set up?" Steve asked, fiddling with the remote. "Our friend here could help you if you want."

"Oh, no, I'm pretty sure you need my help more than he does," you teased, snatching the remote out of his hand. No way was he tricking you into being alone with Bucky.

"You're probably right," Bucky concurred, chuckling as Steve scowled at him. "I'll be right back."

Bucky disappeared down the hallway as you worked on setting up the movie. The moment you could no longer hear his footsteps, you turned to Steve and scowled.

"I know what you're playing at."

"Who, me?" he asked innocently, placing a hand over his heart.

"Yes, you. Stop trying to make this happen," you hissed, pointing to yourself and the empty seat where Bucky had been previously.

"Are you saying you don't want it to happen?"

"I... well... you know exactly what I'm saying, Steve." Heat prickled in your cheeks as his smirk broadened.

"Sounds to me like you're saying you like him, but you don't want to make a move," he hummed, poking you in the side. You flinched away, swatting at his hand.

"Don't you dare tickle me," you growled, albeit without the bite in your voice you'd been going for.

"Why not? Worried Bucky might find out you're ticklish?" he teased, pinching your side more intentionally this time. An embarrassing high-pitched squeak burst from your throat. Turning your body toward Steve, you held your hands out protectively in front of you and tried desperately to fight back the involuntary smile creeping its way onto your face.

"You always do this when you want something from me!" you whined, smacking his hand away as he made a move to poke your stomach. "It really isn't fair, you know."

"Then maybe you should just admit it. Tell him you like him."

"No way- STEVE! Noho, I'm not going to tell him!" He was throwing rapid pokes at your torso at random now to dodge your swatting hands. "Yohou can't ma-HAKE mehe!"

"Is that a challenge?"

Steve turned to face you more fully, and you shifted your legs instinctively to leap off the couch. Before you could make your move, Steve had tackled you sideways onto the seat cushions and begun digging his fingers into your side and belly. Squeaky laughter burst out of you as you curled your knees up to your chest in a feeble attempt to block his hands.

"STEHEVE you ahass!!" you scolded, pressing your arms down hard against your ribs as he tried spidering his way up your side.

"That's awfully foul language you're using," he chastised teasingly. "It's not making me want to go any easier on you."

"Noho, I'm sohorry, I'm SOHORRY!!" Your laughter increased in volume as he managed to slip past your defenses and dig into your lower ribs.

“What are you two up to?”

You blushed furiously at the sound of Bucky’s voice in the doorway, unable to sit up to look at him given Steve was unrelenting. His legs came into your field of vision as he rounded the sofa to place the popcorn on the coffee table, then his face was in front of yours as he knelt down on the floor next to where you’d toppled over sideways.

“I’m just trying to get our little friend here to admit something very important,” Steve urged. “Maybe you can help, Buck!”

“NO! Noho helping!” you shouted defiantly. But you knew it wouldn’t matter what you said - Bucky’s mouth was already curled up into a mischievous smirk.

“Sure, I’ll help!”

“Perfect.” Steve suddenly relented in his attack so he could tug on your arm and sit you upright. Sensing his plan, you held your other arm out of his reach as best you could, protesting through giggles of anticipation. A quick jab to the ribs on that side sent your arm flying down instinctively to protect yourself, long enough for Steve to capture your wrist and pull it behind your back to join your other arm.

“STEHEVE! I HAHATE YOU!” you cried, squirming to pull your arms from his grasp.

“Oh, woah, now. That’s not very nice,” Bucky teased, skittering his fingers up the soles of your feet so you’d move your legs out of his way. You yelped and bent your knees to pull your feet in close and away from Bucky’s reach, and he immediately sank down into the seat you’d just vacated. “Ticklish feet, huh?”

“Bucky Barnes, I swear to gohod- NOHO!” You kicked at him as his metal hand clamped down around your ankle, tugging your leg out straight so he could set your foot in his lap. Pinning it in place, he began scratching harshly up the length of your sole, laughing as your struggle became violent.

“What is it you’re trying to find out, Steve?” he asked casually, conversing as though he weren’t tickling you to pieces.

“There’s a guy.”

“A what??” Bucky paused his attack, mouth agape as he stared at you in surprise. Heat seeped into your cheeks as you turned your head to look away from the metal-armed soldier.

“He’s lying,” you muttered.

“Am not!”

“Oh, no way is he lying - your face is telling me everything,” Bucky concurred with a sly grin. “Who’s the guy, huh?”

This couldn’t get any more flustering.

“No one!! There isn’t a guy!” you pleaded, avoiding his gaze.

“Hey Buck - try behind the knee,” Steve suggested.

“What- BUHUCK NOHO!” You tugged desperately at your trapped ankle as Bucky slipped his fingers beneath your outstretched knee, scribbling along the taut skin. “PLEHEHEASE! Thehere’s NO ONE!”

“Steve, this isn’t working.”

“Takes a bit. Gotta wear ‘em down, you know?”

“ROGERS!! Yohou are SOHO dead whehen I’m free-heed…”

Bucky glanced up at Steve, clicking his tongue at your cheek. “Threats now, Steve?”

“Mm, can’t let that slide.”

Bucky released your ankle, shifting to kneel on the couch beside you to gain leverage so he could knead all ten fingers into your sides. You threw your head back with the force of your laughter, twisting helplessly away from his fingers.

“You gonna admit it yet?” Steve hummed.

“Yeah, who is this guy? Tell us,” Bucky pressured.

“I WOHON’T!!”

“You won’t even tell your closest friends?” Steve asked indignantly. You shook your head wildly, curling your knees up to your chest as Bucky shifted to target the soft skin of your belly. “Are you gonna make me tell him your weak spot?”

“WHAT? NOHO!” you whined, tilting your head back to plead to Steve with your eyes. Bucky ceased his attack on your belly, now intrigued by Steve’s suggestion.

“Where is it?”

“NOWHERE!”

“Try the ribs, you’ll know when you find it,” Steve explained, ignoring your outburst. You let out a giggly groan, which quickly exploded into wild laughter the moment Bucky’s fingers began kneading into the spaces between your lower ribs.

“Wohow! Is this it??”

“Nah, you’ll know. Try a little higher.”

“STEHEHEVE I SWEHEAR I WILL…”

Your sentence was cut short by your own screech when Bucky found what he’d been searching for - the triggering rib just a couple ribs up from the dead center of your ribcage. The sound caused him to pause so he could laugh in surprise.

“Please tell me this is it, for your sake,” he chuckled.

“Oh yeah. That’s it,” Steve confirmed, earning a sharp glare from you. “You ever want information? That’s where you’ll get it.”

“Ughhhh Steve you’re embarrassing me,” you groaned, hanging your head to hide your blush. Bucky ducked to capture your gaze, contracting his fingertips threateningly into your ribcage just once.

“Last chance. Who’s the guy?” he demanded with a devilish grin.

Even if you wanted to tell him, you weren’t about to do it now. Deep down, you didn’t want this little game to end. This was probably the most Bucky had ever showed you any physical affection, and while you knew it was going to be bad, you were willing to make the sacrifice if only to let this go on a moment longer.

So, you turned your head away to break your gaze from his, spitting the words that were the nail in your coffin:

“Do your worst.”

You didn’t have to tell him twice.

His fingers leapt right into action, sending you into a bout of desperate, shrieky, breathy laughter. Even Steve seemed to struggle with maintaining his grip on your wrists as you writhed and squirmed under Bucky’s fingertips. You were quickly dissolving to silent laughter as you became breathless, and so you used the last bit of air you had to offer your surrender.

Bucky stopped, gazing at you expectantly. Your chest rose and fell sharply with each gulp of air, heart thrumming both from exertion and from the notion that you were going to have to tell the truth. But you couldn’t say it, and you wouldn’t say it. So you did the only thing you could think of.

“Steve… you tell him.” You squeezed your eyes shut, face already burning up as Steve took a breath to speak.

“The guy? Yeah, it’s you.”

“Me?”

You cracked one eye open to catch a glimpse of Bucky’s face. He had a huge, teasing grin that made you whimper and shut your eye again, turning your head away.

“Oh… look at me, you dork!” he urged, scribbling his fingers gently into your belly to make you giggle and smile. You opened your eyes and gazed at him hesitantly, preparing for the teasing. “It’s a damn good thing, because I was ready to go hunt this guy down and tell him off.”

“What?? Why?” you laughed incredulously.

“‘Cause I’ve got a crush on you too,” he responded, a slight tinge of red dusting his cheeks.

“Oh.” You couldn’t withhold the giddy grin that forced itself across your face.

Steve finally released your arms and scooped up the remote to start the movie, satisfied that he’d finally coaxed the truth out of you. You turned to face the screen, squeaking in surprise when Bucky wrapped an arm around your waist and tugged you into his side. After the initial shock was over, you melted into his embrace, leaning your head against his strong shoulder. Out of the corner of your eye, you caught Steve giving you a snarky look that said ‘I told you so.’ You’d yell at him for that later.

For now, you were going to enjoy the movie, wrapped up in Bucky’s arms.

(Tagging @hayden429 by request)