#if we're in bed a lot on our own don't be offended

[idiotwithanipad]

I'm suffering again so here's a bunch of things to never say to someone with HS (Hidradenitis Suppurativa)

・It can't be that bad

・Can't you just pop it?

・Can't you just ignore it?

・We've all had a boil, get over it

・'Hey, Y/n, I've got a headache, would you mind doing *insert very physical task*'

・You should use *insert soap brand that you've tried countless times only for it to fuck up your sores more*

・You've been in bed all week, get up

・It's about the size of a grape, I've had a rash bigger than that

・You're always wearing long sleeves. What are you afraid of?

・So is it contagious?

・Is that an STD?

・Can you stop fidgeting?

・You've taken too many sick days already

・If you don't wanna see us just say so

・The doctors can help (fyi, when I got my diagnosis the doctor couldn't even pronounce it or spell it, they had to google it... So?...)

[starwarsmum]

Chapter 21 of Introducing: Mousinette! Family Dinner

“So, you cleared it all up with daddy bat?” Todd said, stretching for their sparring session. He and Damian were going to be going through some slightly more advanced sparring with Marinette, now that they both knew she had been a hero previously. Damian grunted an affirmative as he went through a few exercises with his katana. “Good, because I really didn't want to try and keep that from him if we're sticking around for family dinner tonight.”

They continued to warm up in near silence, Damian replacing his katana in its scabbard before moving to a treadmill. He had messaged Marinette late that morning, to let her know that he had spoken to his father and check that she still wanted to spar that day. He had been pleased when she had confirmed that as long as she was still welcome in their home, she would be there. 

“Hey lil D, Jay-bird, Mari's here,” Grayson trilled from the doorway, leading a slightly sweaty Marinette into the room. She grinned up at the older man, giving him a quick side hug before coming all of the way into the room. “Do you mind if I join you today? Bruce said we all had to be here for dinner tonight and I'm a little bored.”

“The more the merrier, right Demon?” Todd said, smirking a little. Damian assumed it was because Grayson was the only one in the room who did not know that Marinette could hold her own. He was proved right when he continued with, “You can spar first with Pixie, Dick. Just make sure you don't injure her, or demon brat will have your head.”

“As if I'd hurt her,” Grayson said, sounding offended. “Give me five minutes to change and warm up and I'll be ready.” And then he was off, leaving an amused Marinette, who trotted over to Damian, grinning again.

“Hey,” she said quietly, leaning against his treadmill as he slowed to a stop. It felt more private than it was because the treadmill faced the corner. He could only see Todd if he turned towards him, and he was captivated by Marinette. “So, everything went well last night?”

“That's what he told me,” Todd shouted across to them pointedly, making a lot of noise with the weights he was using. As if they could forget that he was in there. “But that's probably why we're having the family meal tonight, so that we can do a whole thing over it.”

“I'm just glad he didn't feel it necessary to abduct me from my bed,” Marinette said with a giggle, starting up on her own treadmill to keep her blood pumping. She turned to face Jason, jogging backwards as she did so. “Besides, everyone deserves to know, it's not like he can leave a bunch of you in the dark over this.”

“Tt, but he does not have to do it over family dinner,” Damian interjected, sounding as though he was thoroughly annoyed. That particular vein of conversation was cut short by Dick coming back into the room, ready to warm up and spar. Marinette watched him closely as he did a number of surprisingly bendy stretches before launching through a quick trapeze routine.

“Okay, I'm ready to go, lil M,” he said cheerily. “It's your first spar today, so we'll take it easy to begin with - no weapons, tap out and no head punches. That all okay?” He beamed when she nodded and bounded over to the mats.

As they began, Marinette tried to get a feeling for his fighting style. She knew he was athletic, that his flexibility was unmatched by his family and that he wasn't 100% serious about sparring her. He did a couple of feints and jabs, bending out of the way of her own tester shots.

She let it go on for another few minutes before deciding that she would tire before him. She waited until he feinted again, and bounced. Between one breath and the next, she vaulted up and over his arm, grabbing his shirt as she went. As his head snapped up to follow her she gave a smirk and pulled. Then as he stepped forward to keep his balance, she twisted her hips and he flipped over one. 

She stepped on his chest before dropping into an arm bar, pulling it tight against her chest. He wriggled for a few seconds but she applied more pressure and he ended up tapping out pretty quickly. She let him up quickly, flipping onto her own feet just as fast. 

“I really shouldn't be surprised, given that you've been sparring with Jason and dating Dames, but damn Mari,” Dick said, a hint of awe in his voice. Shaking out his limbs, he shot a grin her way. “Wanna go for round 2? Promise I'll try this time.”

Marinette laughed and said she would get back around to him after everyone had a chance to spar. They spent a couple of hours sparring, until Marinette was thoroughly exhausted and even Damian looked worn. Dick grabbed Jason and dragged him towards the exit, saying that they needed to shower before dinner.

“Dude, they spend enough time alone together!” Marinette heard him complain and she giggled breathlessly. She collapsed onto the mats, still giggling lightly, and Damian stood over her with his hands on his hips. 

“Does this mean you do not wish to spar against me any more?” He said, quirking an eyebrow at her. When she didn't make a move to get up, he crouched over her, taking hold of both hands. Once she was sitting up, he stood again, and began bargaining. “If you go and shower now, we will have some free time before dinner and I could show you some of my artwork.”

Marinette scrambled up and out of the room so quickly she barely heard his bark of laughter before the door shut behind her.

_ _ _

“...and this piece is one I am working on for Pennyworth,” Damian said softly, revealing an easel with an in-progress painting of Damian and his pets, Alfred the Cat, Titus and Batcow. She could see a line of reference photos and was impressed with the level of detail already showing. “If I continue to work on it at my current rate, it should be complete by December.”

“It's amazing, Damian,” Marinette said in an equally soft voice. “I know Alfred will love it, it's already incredible. And I imagine anything you set your mind to wouldn't dare be incomplete by your schedule.”

“You must think yourself highly amusing,” he replied, voice dry but a smile on his face. She rolled her eyes and pulled him in for a short kiss, but the moment their lips touched his arm snaked around her waist and held her close. She was out of breath when she finally pulled away and he pulled her against his chest. “I am glad you think them adequate, it is nice to get another artist's view.”

Marinette didn't say anything, humming contentedly against him. His fingers were making idle loops on her back again, making her skin buzz pleasantly. She was disgruntled when a knock sounded on the door, followed by Jason's mocking voice.

“I hope you two have your clothes on, because dinner's ready! Demon Spawn, B says if your girlfriend's staying, he wants you to put her between you and him, so better go claim your seats.” They could hear his footsteps recede from the door quickly, and Marinette reluctantly drew away from Damian.

“Will it make things better or worse if I stay for dinner?” She asked, watching him closely. When he hesitated, she put her hand against his cheek, trying to look into his eyes. “Hey, it's okay. If you're worried I'll be offended about having to go home, I'm not. And if you want me here but don't want to subject me to an inquisition, I'm fine. I wouldn't be here if I didn't think I could handle it.”

“If you are sure,” he said slowly, holding her hand against his cheek. “Then I would prefer to have you with me, to make sure I do not share what I should not, nor keep quiet what you are willing for me to share. In addition, it means I am able to spend more time with you.”

“You're so sappy,” she laughed, allowing him to pull her out of the room and to the dining room. She sat down in the seat he pulled out for her and said hello to everyone already present. She had assumed that Bruce would already be seated to watch her closely, but his seat was the last one to be taken. “Good evening, Mr Wayne.”

“Miss Dupain-Cheng,” he replied, smiling. She wouldn't swear to it, but there was a vapid edge to his smile that she was sure was fabricated. Knowing Damian, she would have found it difficult to believe his father was as air-headed as she had assumed from all of the press that surrounded him. “It's a pleasure to see you again, how're you finding Gotham now that you live here?”

“It gets better everyday,” she said sincerely, glancing at Damian and beaming. “The people here are a lot more welcoming than I thought they would be. Plus, it's nice to hang out with Babs in person instead of behind a screen.”

“Agreed!” The redhead piped up from her own seat. “But if I'd known you were going to ditch me for Damian, I'm not sure I would've introduced you to everyone,” she continued, and Marinette thought that she was at least partly joking. 

“Aw, come on Babs, Mari would've met Lil D no matter what,” Dick chided, frowning at her slightly. “Besides, I'm more concerned that she gets on with Jay and Timmy. At least Dames models healthy choices instead of chugging an unholy amount of caffeine, or eating out all the time.”

“Screw you, Dickie-bird, we don't all have time to make dinner!” Everyone laughed at that, putting Marinette more at ease. Alfred stepped in at that point, bringing dinner to the table for them. Both Dick and Damian leapt up to help carry food, so Marinette stayed seated. Everything was served quickly, and she focused on not having a clumsy moment. “So, B, why the family meal?”

“Perhaps Damian and Miss Dupain-Cheng would like to explain in more detail?” Bruce said evenly, turning to them. She thought she could see a sharpness in his eyes that had been more hidden before. She smiled at him briefly before turning to face the rest of the family.

“Tt, father is alluding to the fact that Marinette is aware of our other activities,” Damian said brusquely. “She is here as an attempt to be open with any questions you may have.”

“Wait, what?” Came Barbara's voice, hissing out between her teeth. When Marinette cringed and looked at her, she looked extremely angry. “Damian Wayne, what did you do?”

“Tt, it is not as though anyone at this table can have an issue with Marinette finding out, given the track records,” Damian said, glaring back at Barbara. Marinette put a hand on his arm, trying to help him reel back his irritation. “Marinette, as you know, is exceptionally clever, she has spent enough time with both of my personas to see that they are the same person.”

“Yeah, and she'd only met me in suit once or twice and she worked me out,” Jason chimed in, looking extremely unbothered by anything. When everyone swung around to stare at him, he shrugged. “What? There are worse people than a retired superhero to find out our family secret.”

The table exploded with questions, Barbara looking stunned. It took several long minutes to calm everyone down, although Marinette noticed that Steph had continued eating normally. Tim was the one who finally managed to get quiet at the table by letting loose an earsplitting whistle. 

“Listen, I am way too tired for this bullshit. Marinette, is this going to change your work with Wayne Enterprises?” Tim said loudly, staring at her until she shook her head. “Fine, I have no other questions, concerns or reserves. Damian, don't screw this up, I will never forgive you if you are the reason MDC stops working with us.”

“Tim! You can't just-” “Brilliant, B, are we done here then? Because I-” “I do not know why I bother to share things when-” “If you're so sleep deprived you can't take this seriously-” 

“Enough,” Bruce said, exuding a tired energy that Marinette immediately recognised. He was holding the bridge of his nose, eyes shut tight. He took a deep breath before starting again. “Clearly I didn't know everything, as I wasn't aware that Jason knew. Does Cass know she was worked out too?”

“No,” came Cass’s soft voice, and she looked slightly alarmed. She glanced at Marinette, taking in her tense shoulders, the lip she was chewing on and the tight way she held Damian’s hand. 

“I'm so sorry,” Marinette blurted out, looking directly at Cass. “I wasn't trying to figure you out, we were just discussing our favourite vigilantes and I-”

“Batgirl is your favourite?” Came Barbara's shocked, and Jason's indignant voices. Marinette's eyes flickered to them next, face turning not-so-slowly red. Jason grumbled, turning a frown her way. “I can't believe I helped Demon Spawn date you when you don't even think I'm your favourite vigilante! What'd Cass do, rescue you from a burning building?”

“Oh my God, you're being such a baby, Jay! Obviously my favourite is Robin, but if I wasn't choosing him, then Batgirl is definitely my next choice,” Marinette said severely. Her cheeks were red, but she carried on. “What's not to like, have you seen her costume? And she's got the whole strong, sexy, silent type thing going on. Don't look at me like that!”

“I was not looking at you any differently than normal,” Damian said, amusement obvious in his tone. “I suppose I am fortunate that I was the one visiting your rooftop this summer, else this could have been a very different meal.”

“Can someone please ask a serious question? Anything, please, to change the subject.”

“Sure thing, what're your thoughts on Spoiler?” Steph said easily, flicking her leftovers at Tim. “I may not have the ‘strong, silent type thing', but I'm very flexible,” she assured Marinette with a wink, promptly bursting out into laughter when Marinette dropped her head into her hands.

“I hate everyone at this table. This is worse than when Jon found out about Multimouse and forced me to answer questions. Or when I found out who Hawkmoth was and had to deal with the fallout with Adrien. If nobody has any real questions, I'm going home.”

“I am sorry, Starling, I will stop teasing you,” Damian murmured, clasping her hand tightly. She grumbled but settled into her seat again. He brushed a kiss to the back of her hand and she smiled at him. “If you truly wish to leave, I will take you home now.”

“You two are sickeningly cute,” Steph remarked, her plate now clear. “But fine, what the heck is a Multimouse? Or a Hawkmoth, for that matter?”

“Oh, um, Multimouse was me, a Parisian sort-of hero. Hawkmoth was the supervillain our heroes defeated years ago, but he used to terrorise citizens by forcing them to do his bidding everytime they got sad or angry.” A silence followed her words, most of the room staring at her.

“Mari, how on earth did none of this come up during any of our conversations?” Barbara queried. Marinette shrugged uneasily, nose scrunching a little. “No, seriously, we've been talking for nearly a year, and it just never came up? I feel like an emotional terrorist should have come up, especially since you were a superhero.”

“Oh, because your moonlighting as Batgirl in your youth came up?” She shot back, eyebrows raised. A short laugh barked out of her at the other woman's surprised expression. “Give me a little credit, Babs, it's pretty obvious who the original Robin was so it's not exactly a leap to work out who's who. This is exactly as ridiculous as Jason being upset that I didn't tell him about Multimouse because, and I'm quoting here, ‘I thought we were friends’.”

“Yeah, well, I didn't think you knew I was Red Hood when I said it,” Jason interjected, looking far too at ease for Marinette's liking. She scowled at him, sticking her tongue out when he smirked at her. “Besides, according to Adrien you were a pretty badass hero.”

“Note that I did not pry into your secrets when I found out, whereas you and Jon were entirely too enthusiastic about grilling me for information,” she retorted, chest going tight at the casual mention of Adrien. It eased slightly when Damian squeezed her hand gently. “Regardless, I am happy to answer any questions you have about my extremely brief time as Multimouse.”

There was a flurry of questions, mostly from Dick about Hawkmoth. Bruce occasionally chimed in, to ask about the other Parisian heroes. Marinette answered everything they asked, careful not to tell any outright lies in case she wanted to tell them about her other alterego some day.

“And you're sure the threat has been completely neutralised?” Bruce said eventually, and Marinette could see Batman in the way his eyes were calculative, searching her micro-expressions for uncertainty. “Is there any way for us to get in touch with Ladybug or Chat Noir, to make sure they don't need any help?”

“I'm sure, and Ladybug and Chat Noir are retired - nobody has seen them in suit for at least two years. It would take something monumental to bring them out of retirement, I think,” she said confidently, keeping hold of his gaze until he nodded. When he did, she smiled again, before trying to end the Q and A. “Was there anything else you wanted to know right now?”

“Would you be a hero again?” Cass said, her words slow, and her gaze fixed firmly to Marinette. “If Ladybug had to come back, would you be a hero?”

Marinette paused, uncomfortably aware that Cass had not asked if she would be Multimouse again. She scrutinised the woman, earning herself a sharp smile and she was positive that the latest Batgirl had her figured out. “If I was needed, there's not a thing in this world that would stop me from taking up my old mantle.”

When dinner eventually ended, nearly everyone dispersed, Jason saying something about patrol. The exceptions were Cass and Damian, who both went with Marinette to collect her bags. Once they were alone, Marinette squinted at the older woman.

“I'll say nothing,” Cass said, a grin on her face. Marinette smiled back at her ruefully, thanking her quietly. “You make Damian happy. You are like a sister now.” And then she left without saying goodbye, leaving Marinette to blush and stammer.

“She is right, you do make me happy,” Damian said, drawing her into his arms. She blushed even harder, a bright smile on her face as he looked down at her. “And I am glad you stayed, even though it was a difficult meal and conversation.”

“Thank you for trusting me enough to include me in the conversation,” she replied, pressing herself tightly against him. Then she sighed and pulled away, grabbing her bags as she did so. “Anyway, I'd better head home. Walk me out?”

“Tt, as if I would let you go home alone when I can drive you myself.”

[noblehouseofgay]

Popular

Part 3 of Noble's Wicked Series

Reg, Dorcas, and Barty friendship

Silly fluff

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Regulus dug through his drawers, tossing clothes to the side, deciding they weren't good enough.

"Do you want help, Reg?" Cas sat on Regulus' bed, with Barty sitting at her feet.

"No." He snapped back.

Barty smirked. "That sounded a lot like a 'yes please I'm desperate.'"

Dorcas stood up, walking over to the shorter boy. "You know we're friends, Reg. And that means we're helping you, even if you don't want it."

"I don't want it."

"I know. That's what makes us good friends." She winked, smiling as she looked through the clothes he'd tossed aside.

Barty hops up, joining Cas in her search. He begins scanning through accessories. "You know, Reggie. We really are great friends, you're quite lucky. We see someone less fortunate and decide we just have to help."

"Die."

"Aww, don't be like that Reggie. You need a makeover for your date."

"And we know exactly what you need."

Barty snorted. "Even for you, the toughest case we could possibly face. We'll succeed, Reggie."

Dorcas held a shirt up to Regulus. "You'll be popular." Barty came up behind, fluffing Regulus' hair.

"We'll teach you the proper ploys, when you talk to boys-" he fake coughed, "Potter-"

Dorcas laughed and Regulus glared, throwing a shoe at the green haired boy. Barty cackled as he dodged it.

Dorcas lightly messed with Regulus' hair. "We'll show you what shoes to wear, how to fix your hair, everything that really counts to be popular. So let's start, because we've got an awfully long way to go."

"Don't be offended by our frank analysis," Barty poked his fingers at Regulus' cheeks, pushing his face into a smile, "think of it as personality dialysis! Now that we've chosen to become a pal!"

"A sister!"

"And adviser!"

"There's nobody wiser! Not when it comes to popular."

"We know about popular."

Dorcas dramatically tosses a jacket over Regulus' shoulders. "And with an assist from us to be who you'll be, instead of dreaming who you were-"

Barty interjects, "well, are-" earning him an elbow to the ribs from Regulus. Barty just laughed and started dusting Regulus' cheeks with makeup.

"There's nothing that can stop you from becoming popular!"

Barty hops onto the bed. "When we see depressing creatures," gesturing to Regulus' ever prominent frown, "with unprepossessing features. I remind them on their own behalf to think of-"

"Celebrated heads state!" Dorcas chimed in.

"Or especially great communicators!"

"Did they have brains or knowledge?" Barty smirked, quickly turning it into a cackle. "Don't make me laugh. They were-"

"Popular?" Regulus deadpanned.

Barty slammed his hands on the dresser, eyes filled with fire. "Right!!" He had a wicked grin on his face, grabbing Regulus' hand and twirling him. "It's all about popular!"

Dorcas and Barty stepped back, looking at Regulus.

"He's finished."

"We've done it again, Cas."

Regulus did look amazing, truly. He looked like himself with just some extra flare, something to stand out.

"Potter will drop dead!" Cas exclaimed.

"We can hope-" Barty snorted.

Regulus sighed. "Fine, yes, we're done now, thank you. I have to go, I'll be late." He gave them a nod and slipped out the door.

Dorcas dramatically sighed, leaning against the bedframe. "And although he protests, his disinterest...I know clandestinely..."

Barty smiled. "He's gonna grin and bear it! His newfound popularity!" He laughed like a hyena, jumping onto the bed and pulling Cas up with.

They laughed, dancing together before collapsing onto the bed.

"He'll be popular, just not quite as popular as us!"

[fourwingedwriter]

Godly Warriors - Canid Capture Part 4

AN: Hope yall enjoy my insect people :D

First Part - Previous - Next - Intro/Master Post

CWs: references to body related insecurity, references to blood loss

Lepid POV

----

My wings were being tended to, our medics trained heavily in each warrior's anatomy. Mine were especially tricky, easy to break or damage due to their size and structure. So, to distract myself from the procedures being done on them, I watched my sibling.

Cole was visibly uncomfortable about being in close proximity with Canid. She would constantly glance across the medical tent as if something about her presence would mean danger.

"We're not going to be killed. You really need to calm down. It's not like we kidnapped her." I eventually said, giving her a look.

"I'm not scared!" Cole exclaimed, conjouring an offended look.

"I didn't say you were scared."

She opened her mouth to retort and promptly looked away, embarrassed, "Shut up."

I rolled my eyes, "Why don't we discuss actual issues?"

He looked to me, jaw set, "The poachers blocked the last path to the mammalian temples. I'm positive they've been tracking Canid, which would explain why they've been moving so weirdly."

"Correct." I glanced to Canid, who looked half dead, "Which means we're going to have her tagging along for a while."

Cole dug her hands into her cloak and glared at nothing, "Fuck."

I straightened my clothes, uncomfortable in the fit of Cole's shirt. It was slightly too big on me but was the only shirt compatible with wings we had on hand. I felt exposed, the colar going down too far and the back hole too tight.

"Lepid Sir," a medic got my attention, "We finished with the Warrior. She lost a lot of blood, but there are no signs of infection. She shouldn't be moved for as long as we can manage. Much more bloodloss will be fatal."

"Thank you Mallow. Keep someone at her bedside, she may try to stand." I bowed slightly as I stood, turning to Cole, "Release your wings. You look sore."

She sighed, pulling harshly on her breastplate straps before ripping it off. Her deep brown wings spread out, and she relaxed slightly, "Go rest. I'm going to send out some scouts."

-

The air was heavy with unrest. Cole sat on her bed, acting as though she wasn't watching me try to lay down comfortably. I knew she felt my pain, remembering the days we used to lay on our backs.

"Do you need me to help?" She finally blurted out.

"Please." I said weakly, sitting up and bracing myself to make it easier for her.

Cole walked over, pausing slightly before putting her hands on my back. He gave the best massages, also understanding the way our back muscles worked. I practically melted under her touch, letting out a low groan as she released part of my lower back.

"You owe me." She says, pressing into the space between my upper and lower wings, relieving tension I wasn't even aware of.

"Thank you."

I stretch, feeling more free than I had in months. The human body was not and will never be designed for wings. I look to Cole, who had her wings out, a sight even I rarely saw.

"You should keep them out more often. That brestplate is gonna make dents in your shoulders." I reminded him, gesturing to her mostly bare chest, the chafing almost impressively bad.

"You know it makes me feel vulnerable." Cole didn't make eye contact with me, her softer side something she hid from everyone else.

I couldn't argue with her, knowing how much shame she held for her "improper" manifestation of her Warrior side. We both know it's because she's part beetle, the craving of an armored shell only natural.

"Get some sleep. You look half dead." He called over, climbing into her own bed.

----

Tagging: @tildeathiwillwrite @whumperofworlds @rainbowsandwhumperflies

[nellie-elizabeth]

Outlander: Hello, Goodbye (7x13)

After the high of the last few weeks of so much Lord John, I was bracing myself to be a little less invested in this week's installment. But it was another really strong showing!

Cons:

I used to harp on this a lot back in the old days and then it seemed pointless to keep bringing it up, but I should mention here once again that Sophie Skelton is the weak link acting-wise on this show. There's this moment when she's all offended at the sexist police implying that she might have been having an affair with Rob Cameron, but Skelton's acting is so weird in the scene that it actually seems like Brianna is lying about that? I don't know. It's unfortunate that she's not as strong a performer, so when the dialogue isn't stellar she can't carry it off like most of the others. Also, why doesn't Brianna at least tell them that Roger wants to steal money from them? Why hide that? I understand she can't tell the cops about hidden gold and time travel, but not providing any reason for Rob to kidnap her kid just made her look guilty as hell.

I really liked the stuff with Roger and his dad, it was genuinely moving. But I do wish that the end of this episode's moment of realization had been framed a little different. Here, it's presented like the idea that Jem isn't here in this time is something Roger is just now realizing. Even though surely he would have had suspicions about this from the second he realized that his father was here in the 1730s. I wish it had been framed more as "I've been thinking it for a while now but I was in denial..." rather than it being a new idea just occurring to Roger. Especially since we the audience know that Jem is in the 20th century already, so there's no bite to it.

This isn't a flaw of the episode per se, but now that we're at Ian and Rachel wedding time, I'm missing Dottie. She's such a fun character, and I like the Dottie and Denzel stuff a lot in the books. I'm sad it seems that it's not making the cut, here.

Pros:

Like I said, though, I did really like the stuff with Roger meeting his father Jeremiah! It's always fun when one of our core time-traveling family comes across someone who's new to the idea, because it injects this fresh sense of: yeah, this is fucking nuts, isn't it! And Roger offering him a truth: "we win the war, because of men like you," was so sweet. It's a real tragedy, having Roger send his father back through the stones, when we know Roger grew up without his dad. Clearly, Jeremiah didn't survive the trip back, or at least he didn't make it back to his wife and new child. So bittersweet, that Roger got to have this short window of time to speak to him, and his father didn't even know he was speaking to his own son! Oof. Beautifully performed by the actors, my heartstrings were really tugged.

Then, back in our main timeline of the three that appear in this episode: we get a brief check-in with John, who stumbles upon some continentals and pretends to have escaped from royalists... that's going to lead to some fun stuff in next week's episode, I know it, but for now it's just a brief check-in with my fave.

John does get mentioned a few other times, once when Denzel tells Jamie that he helped him to escape from being hanged. It's so funny to watch Jamie figure out how to feel about the news that he almost got John killed, like, he's still too pissed off to be fully in friendship mode but also by now he's probably feeling pretty bad about the way he behaved, even if the anger is still there. It's deliciously complex. Also, it's absolutely hilarious and deranged that Jamie and Claire are staying together in Claire's room in John's house, like, having a scene of the two of them sitting up before going to sleep, when the last time we saw Claire in that bed, John was the one lying where Jamie is lying now? Like? What the hell. That is not a thing that happens in the books, I'm almost sure. And Claire is all "you're thinking about John?" as an opening to that conversation... look, the three of you should all just kiss until your problems go away. This is getting ridiculous. In the best way.

While I've been a flip-flopper about Ian and Rachel, I actually thought their Quaker wedding and their wedding night were really wonderful! One of the hottest, sweetest sex scenes this show has ever done, in my opinion? Like, Jamie and Claire have good sex scenes, the actors definitely have chemistry, but we also have a pretty similar dynamic for a lot of those sex scenes, we understand the rhythm of their physical relationship pretty well after seven seasons of doing this. Having the sweet, slow first time with Ian and Rachel was just so lovely, and I thought both actors did an amazing job with the performance!

And I liked digging into Denzel and Rachel's relationship as brother and sister, their complicated feelings about being put out of meeting in order to follow their principles, and Rachel now marrying a man who has killed and might have to kill again. We see Jamie looking very dashing in his general's uniform as he prepares to join the war effort once again - Claire seems to like the way he looks in it, but we know that she and Rachel will always worry, watching their men go off to fight. Claire points out to Jamie that the men aren't dragging their women into anything, though. They are going to where they belong, which is by the sides of their husbands.

So, yeah! I think next week we're going to get more of Lord John and now that I've been so thoroughly spoiled by the past few episodes, I can only demand more. But even with the focus finally turning elsewhere, I liked this episode quite a lot. Brianna's plot thread being a weak spot, at least we've got Jem back with his mom and we're moving the story forward!

7.5/10

[inhuman-obey-me]

Congrats for 2.7k followers!! You guys are the best in writing, I always come back and reread a LOTT from your master list! For the request, can I have "🖤 - You fell in love with the evil that you bare" with Levi?? Don't care if mc is included-- I wish y'all a great day and take caree ^v^

This is like 8 months late and we're so so sorry for the very long wait!! But thank you so much for the sweet words -- that really means a lot and we're so happy people still enjoy our writing!! ; /// ; ❤️

"You fell in love with the evil that you bare." - Leviathan

“I never wanted to come to this awful place to begin with!”

Leviathan’s eyes open with a start, his heart racing and breath shallow. Slowly, his surroundings come into focus – the soft blue glow highlighting the rim of the bathtub he was nestled in, the dim light flowing through his jellyfish fixtures, the posters and figures on the wall and shelves in view. He was in his room, in the present day – not in the past, like in his dream. With a sigh, he heaves himself up and folds himself over a side of his porcelain bed, watching Henry 2.0 swimming in the vast aquarium mere feet away. 

It had been ages since he had dreamt of the Great Celestial War or of their fall, which often were strange distortions of his own memory. Tonight it seemed his subconscious decided to remind him of a time soon after their fall, a time where Leviathan was full of anguish and despair at becoming a demon – the very beings he had before fought so valiantly against, had led the entire Celestial Army to defeat until a truce of peace had been declared. His life up until that point he had had the hatred for demons so firmly instilled in him, and even with movements towards tolerance and his own rebellion against the Celestial Realm’s ways, centuries of hate could not be so easily unlearned. 

Avatar of Envy, he soon was titled. Strange to think that the envy had rooted its way in his heart even before the war. With peace declared, he had lost his purpose – what was a General to do if there was no point in preparing troops for battle? No strategies to devise? He was rendered useless, his position defunct. How he envied the others who still seemed to have some purpose, some worth – no one ever said he might as well be gone, but why would they? It was clear as the bright celestial sky. 

But then he was asked to join Lucifer in his battle against the Celestial Realm, against their Father. And he joined, because he too had realized the unfairness of it all, not just of the punishment dealt to their sister who had just acted on love but to all the other strange cracks that their Father tried to hide or excuse. So he joined, because it was the right thing to do and oh he could be useful again! 

And then they failed. 

He failed.

As he fell, as white wings and halo were traded for a serpentine tail and branching horns and scales, he felt that envy burn brightly. It consumed him, it enraged him, it sickened him. The ugliest parts of him now spilled from him and oh how he hated it! Hated what he had become with every fiber of his being – and so he hid himself away, fearing to even look in the mirror and see eyes of raging envy look back at him. 

But then, ever-so-slowly, Leviathan acclimated to his new demonic nature. To be named an Avatar was one of great pride and importance in the Devildom, the very manifestation of the sin. It was who he was, and he even was named the Grand Admiral of Hell’s Navy (though he questioned the need with established peace). He would act on his temptations, on selfishness, on more violent and cruel impulses that would have shocked his former self. He began to find joy in raking his claws through an offending demon, joy in absorbing himself utterly and completely in his passions, joy in his power. 

There was a strange freedom to it all, one he was not afforded in the Celestial Realm. A freedom that had been for so long seen as evil by those more sanctimonious. 

Leviathan was by one of his shelves now, his hands having found one of his novels that he now absentmindedly flipped through, thumb brushing the edges of pages until it caught on one. He glanced down at the page, and he caught sight of a line: “You fell in love with the evil that you bare.” 

Had he fallen in love with it? Or had he merely accepted it, and had found his moments of exhilaration through it all? The freedom, that embodiment of sin that was his to claim. 

He placed the book back, dropping into his chair to boot his latest game up. A wry, hopeless smirk crossed his lips as he watched the 2d demon slayer dance across the screen.

What did it matter? It was pointless to think too long on the question, because the answer wouldn’t change a thing.

He let himself fade into another world once more.

[kickasssloth666]

I'm trying to make some new friends :)) if anyone reads this and is interested please feel free to send me a message!

Hey there everyone!!

I'm not sure how to start describing myself, I'm not great with words but I'll try my best.

(I'm so sorry for the extremely long post ahead!)

I think some of my most defining characteristics are that I'm very shy, awkward, "weird" and "different" or at the very least I feel weird, different and often misunderstood.

I'm unfortunately not very smart, I'd say I'm down right stupid lol

I am very ignorant about many things in life, I'd say I'm somewhat innocent and naive. I still don't understand my purpose in life and I haven't found a reason to be alive either.

I sometimes say things that offend people or I say things that are wrong. Sometimes I don't completely understand what I do wrong but I don't do it on purpose and I try to improve to the best of my abilities.

I don't go out often at all. Whenever I do go out it's only to buy groceries and such but I don't enjoy it, I much rather be at home, in my room most specifically, which is my favorite place in the world.

I don't have any IRL friends but I do have a handful of online friends, I'm not particularly close to any of them tho.

I enjoy many things like sculpting for instance! I do digital sculpting for fun. I'm pretty bad at it but I try my best. There are many things I'd like to create and I hope to make those things a reality in the near future!

I like to watch anime! my favorites change from time to time but I really like Jujutsu Kaisen, My Hero Academia, Dragon Ball, Demon Slayer, Ancient Magus Bride (I really love this show!) among many others!

I like to collect action figures.

I really like masks!

I love movies and I love to talk about them and analyze them.

I like all kinds of music, I don't really have any artists that I like in particular other than David Bowie and Violent Vira but I'm always happy and open to new suggestions!

I like to scroll through TikTok and to watch long essay style videos on YouTube about random topics.

I love video games!! I don't play too many modern games, I mostly prefer older stuff, like, ps2 era games, particularly survival horror stuff. I also really like very old platform games and side scrollers but I'd be open to play anything and I'd love to try co op games since I never played anything online with anyone and it looks super fun and I'd love to try it!! playing Stardew Valley with a friend is a dream of mine lol (if you also play Stardew please tell me who's your wife/husband)

I adore animals!! I have cats and dogs and they're my babies and my world!

I think it's important to mention some of the things I don't like too.

I don't like cruelty or mean spirited people, I hate big companies, billionaires, politicians and other people in positions of power that use their money and power to affect people, animals, or the environment for their own gain.

I don't like injustices, I hate racists, homophobic people, transphobic people, sexists, and all kinds of discrimination in general.

I hate bugs!! I'm deadly afraid of them 😖

I really dislike conflict and arguments, I believe we can disagree and have discussions as long as we're calm and civilized about it and as long as we have respect for each other and try our best to understand the other person's point of view.

lastly I'd like to mention some of my defects and shortcomings.

I'm extremely anxious, I'm always very nervous about one thing or another, I'm also extremely weak of mind, I tend to react with my feelings a lot and I'm often very emotional.

I can be very selfish at times, I have an awful tendency to get bored of things quickly and sometimes I also get bored of conversations and people.

I think I'm immature.

I can be extremely lazy, I struggle a lot with doing basic things like cleaning or cooking. when I'm anxious or afraid I can get paralyzed with fear and stay in bed all day doing nothing feeling awful about it.

As I mentioned before sometimes I can say bad things without realizing. I'm very dumb and ignorant so I promise I don't mean anything bad I say and I'm trying to improve!

I am extremely annoying. I'm very loud and I think I scream a lot. I don't really understand what constitutes screaming exactly but I think I often raise my voice a lot and especially when I'm excited I can't control myself very well.

I'm very afraid of life and I don't understand how the "real world" works exactly. I'm really bad at small talk and I think I'm really bad at speaking in general, I also digress a lot.

I have the bad habit of not replying very fast, sometimes I'll even wait for weeks or even months, I think it's one of my biggest problems when it comes to keep in touch with people, sometimes it's simply because I don't have the energy, other times it's because I'm not sure about how to continue a conversation. Not sure if this is a defect necessarily but I also never send the first message, I just hate to be annoying.

I'm full of defects in general, and I do believe I'm a bad person. I try to improve and I try my best but if I'm bad for you in any way or a burden I promise to stop talking to you and not bother you!

I have many other defects but I think those are the main ones I can remember right now.

Finally what I'm looking for is a real connection with someone, a person I can talk to, have fun with, watch stuff with and play games together and such! just be able to share our days and even be able to help each other and be there when we need each other. I know I'm a mess of a human being and I may never find the connection I'm looking for but I'd like to give it a try cause you never know :)

I have Instagram, discord and twitter as social media if it's more comfortable to talk there. I also think I prefer audio messages, it's easier for me to send audio notes rather than to type cause I type a lot 😅 thank you very much to anyone that has taken the time to read my extremely long post and considers messaging me!!

[littlest-w01f]

Slumber Party

Feyre x Evelyn (my oc, Tamlin's sister) [Feylin ship]

For @feyreweekofficial

Feyre week 2024 Masterlist

Day 7: Free day

Summary: Feyre having a first proper sleepover with Evelyn

Cw: Fluff, slightly sad, Friends yelling at each other about their choices to make bargains

Feyre couldn't believe it, in a year she had settled in the Spring court so easily, she had Evelyn to thank for it, bubbly Evelyn who always made sure to not make her feel excluded. Evelyn and Feyre had formed a sister-like friendship soon after Feyre had arrived to live in spring.

"So, have you ever had a sleepover?" Evelyn had asked her, her eyes wide, popping a berry in her mouth. The two of them were on a picnic, eating different forms of berries.

Feyre looked at her confused, chewing her own fruit, seated in Evelyn's garden, "Well, don't we every night? We live in the same palace..."

"Oh, you did not just say that," Evelyn looked at her almost offended, "No... That's not a sleepover."

She smiled softly, "A sleepover is another step of friendship, we do each other's hair, and nails, we talk about males, we twirl around in pretty dresses or just stay in our nightgowns." Evelyn smiled brighter, "And we also kick the males out and sleep in the same bed." Evelyn turned to face Tamlin and Lucien, who were a little further away from them when she stated it.

"That sounds fun." Feyre smiled back. "And we have snacks...?"

"Of course, we have snacks, Feyre!" Evelyn gasped, playfully enraged they wouldn't be. "A sleepover is nothing without snacks that people can't finish and they have to be packed away."

Feyre looked over her shoulder to Tamlin and Lucien, "Well I could do without those two for a while." Making them send a wave of talking over each other, pissed at the two females making a joke on their behalf.

"You can paint me," Evelyn wiggled her eyebrows, ignoring her brother and their friend.

Feyre and Evelyn were soon alone in the mansion, Evelyn sprawled over a couch with Feyre standing on the opposite ends, with her canvas and paint. Feyre's brows were furrowed in concentration as she moved the brush flawlessly across the canvas.

"So...?" Evelyn had a teasing tone, "How is being a High Fae?"

Feyre smiled, looking up from her work, "I... I can see colours so much clearer, it's amazing."

"We're just better." Evelyn gave a cocky grin, the grin that matched Tamlin's almost identically.

"You are gorgeous," Feyre breathed with a soft blush, if Feyre had thought the Spring Court Fae were pretty before with their masks, Evelyn was painfully gorgeous, especially by human standards. Evelyn was a mix of soft and sharp features, something Feyre felt she could not put on paper. There was something in her emerald eyes that swirled differently than some other Fae she had seen, well, she had also seen only a handful of Fae as close as she had seen her.

"Should've chosen me over Tam, Feyre." Evelyn gave a wink, chuckling slightly. "You're gorgeous too."

Feyre was a lot fuller now, especially after Under the Mountain, she and Tamlin had managed to figure out how to make her feel better and manage being High Fae, she was a lot more powerful, just as much powerful as the heir of High Lords.

It was quite after that, Evelyn posing for Feyre as she painted, a little pain splattering on her hands. Alis had come in, setting their finger foods down on the small dining table in the room, Evelyn had asked Alis to stay with them but she had smiled and said he would be with her nephews, taking them out for dinner in a new place that had been fixed up.

"Could... Could you not include this?" Evelyn whispered, motioning to the black ink band around her ring finger on her left hand, and a tattoo of stars and swirls flowing up.

Feyre smiled a little sadly, looking at the tattoos "What does it signify?" She had never asked, seeing how Evelyn was uncomfortable with it, as Tamlin had told her, telling her it was Evelyn's story to tell. "If you are feeling up to telling me."

"Well, we do have deep conversations during sleepovers," Evelyn smiled softly, "It's a bargain I made with Rhysand." She didn't talk of the band but the rest of the ink. "I... I made it so that Rhysand would look after you... Keep you... Alive."

"What...?" Feyre set down her brush at that, walking to sit next to her, "That's why he was... Did he ever...?"

"No." Evelyn cut in, "No he never actually hurt me, even if we did piss each other off a lot."

"What did you give away?" Feyre asked, her hand holding Evelyn's tattooed one, stroking the swirls.

Evelyn smiled slightly, letting Feyre feel the magic of the bargain, "A week every month, for my entire life. I have to stay with him."

"But it's been months since then." Feyre looked slightly hopeful, "Maybe he forgot."

Evelyn smiled, moving to sit closer to Feyre, "That's just wishful thinking, the Night Court is rather... Firm... about their bargains."

Feyre looked melancholy, "Well, this got upsetting quickly."

"Ok." Evelyn shrugged, a smile forming on her face again, she picked up the pillow she was leaning against and smacked Feyre in the head with it.

Feyre's eyes widened, "Oh no you didn't!" She picked up her own pillow before swinging at her.

"Oh yes I did!" Evelyn dodged her hit. Swinging again as she got up, Feyre followed her, trying to get a hit on each other.

Feyre landed a hit, making Evelyn stumble slightly against the wall, "How could you give yourself up for me!" Feyre held the pillow against Evelyn's neck as if it were a weapon.

"Because it's you!" Evelyn yelled before hitting Feyre across the face with her pillow, "Because you gave yourself up for my brother! For me! For Lucien! For all of my people!"

"Stop yelling!" Feyre yelled back, glaring, holding her pillow like a sword.

"No!" Evelyn glared back but didn't yell anymore. "You were willing to die for my brother, and you did die. Of course I would do anything to protect you. Even if it is making a deal with Death itself."

Feyre paused, "You did it all for me?"

"Of course I did." Evelyn set down the pillow in her hands, "And I would do it again."

Feyre smirked when she put her pillow away, choosing to strike her again hard enough to make feathers fly out of it, "And I would always help our people!"

"Oh, are we screaming again!?" Evelyn glared, throwing the pillows on the couch at her. "You don't get to be the only person who scrifies something for people."

"Well, you're too gorgeous to end up dead over me!" Feyre yelled and Evelyn was surprised at the splash of dark green paint that now covered her face.

"There!" Feyre smiled, rubbing the paint in Evelyn's hair, "Now I can capture you in paint!"

Evelyn squealed as she heard Feyre mumble "Stupid gorgeous Fae" running to the paint table and throwing the bowl of pink paint.

"Shut the fuck up Feyre." Evelyn watched the pink paint run down Feyre's face, "You're gorgeous too!"

The two run in circles, hitting each other with pillows and paints, yelling aggressive compliments at each other. They end up falling on the floor of paint and feathers, giggling. Evelyn uses her magic to clean both of them.

"Is this what a sleepover is like?" Feyre asked, breathless.

Evelyn shook her head, "I don't know, It's my first too. But I liked it."

The two smile, looking at each other and the mess they had made.

"We left you guys alone for 4 hours!"

"GET LOST!"

{General taglist: @nox-ceur @lilah-asteria}

[lailyn]

MTH 2022 Auction Fill

@marveltrumpshate auction fill for @arabesqueangel

A Face In The Crowd (Chapter 1/3)

Summary:

Embarking on missions to track down errant Loki Variants is a dangerous endeavour, one that has landed Loki in the care of Doctor Strange, TVA's very own medical expert, time and time again.

To say that their engagement got off to a rocky start would be an understatement.

"I don’t want you getting any ideas. The infirmary is just as secure as anywhere else here at the TVA."

"Just what do you think I'm going to do, Mobius?" Loki asked in exasperation. “Please, give me ideas. I don’t have near enough in my head already.”

"Loki, I mean it. Don't get on his nerves. He can make your life very easy, or very difficult," Mobius warned. "Both our lives, actually."

"What absolutely unnecessary advice," Loki said. "When am I ever not on my best behaviour?"

"You really want me to answer that?" Mobius deadpanned. 

"Yes," Loki crossed his arms petulantly. "In writing."

Mobius shook his head. "Unbelievable."

"If this guy is so unpleasant, why are we going to him in the first place?"

“You gotta ask?” Mobius pointed at Loki's blood-soaked sleeve. "You're bleeding all over the floor. And that is a brand-new jacket."

"If I had my magic, this would have healed ages ago," Loki huffed, fingering the cut gingerly.

"But you don't have your magic, do you?” Mobius challenged. “Besides, Vincent’s real pedantic about seeing the new Variants and giving them the all clear before sending them out into the field."

"Why bother?" Loki muttered. “You’re going to do away with us all in the end.”

"It's standard procedure. I can't have you drop dead from an undiagnosed heart condition or something and jeopardise the mission." 

Loki's nose crinkled. "Have I ever done that before?"

"As a matter of fact, yes," Mobius said. “Once or twice.”

"You can't be serious."

"It's the truth. I remember one time, it was smallpox that did you in." Mobius shuddered at the memory. "It really wasn't pretty."

“Oh dear, oh dear.”

______________________________________________

“Agent Mobius! What have you brought for me today?" 

A tall man dressed in a white coat waltzed through the sterile orange doors. There was no mistaking the glee in his steps. "You caught a rather big fish, I hear." 

"News travels fast," Mobius said dryly. "Vincent, meet Loki. Loki, meet Vincent Strange."

The man with the frosty eyes smiled. His striking good looks made him appear even more aloof. "Doctor Vincent Strange. For now. Haven't had the chance to get acquainted with each other, have we?"

Mobius snorted. "Somehow I can see that happening in no time. He's a bit clumsy, this one."

"Perfect," Vincent purred, flashing his perfect teeth in a grin as wide as it was false. "My favourite kind of variant."

"Let's see what we have, shall we?” Vincent patted the stool next to him. "Sit yourself down right here."

Loki reluctantly did as he was told. 

"Take your jacket off," Vincent ordered.

No sooner had Loki shrugged the offending garment off than the doctor started poking and prodding at the oozing cut on his forearm. "Now that is a beautiful wound. Clean edges, satisfyingly deep…and my, my, I haven't had a wound bed this pristine in a while. Did you inflict this on yourself?"

Loki wrenched his arm away. “Is this man for real?”

A strong hand snaked around Loki’s wrist and tugged it back down hard. “I didn’t say I was done with you, sweetheart.”

“Sweet - oh for the love of - Mobius, just kill me,” Loki begged.

“That’s what you always say,” Vincent sighed. “Still you lot refuse to die the most.”

“Strange,” Mobius warned.

"Oh, we're not talking about that, are we?" The man's eyebrows shot up to meet his hairline. "When is this one from? Fresh from the fall?"

"A bit further down the timeline, but he's still a little raw."

"I'm sure your stint at the TVA will toughen you up in no time."

“I’m simply dying with anticipation,” Loki said, voice dripping with acid. 

Mobius clucked his tongue. “Yeah, he’s a bit mouthy, this one.”

“Aren’t they all? Except for the last Loki you brought me. Now she was all mouth...literally.” Vincent chuckled at what Loki suspected was an inside joke, judging by the way Mobius allowed himself a faint smile.

“Oh, but this one - he had his muzzle on for quite some time too.” Vincent held Loki's chin in a pincer grip and turned his patient’s head from side to side. “I can see the marks.”

“Just long enough for us to collar him. Didn’t see the point of putting it back on,” Mobius explained. “We kinda needed him to talk.”

"You're my favourite analyst, you know that?" Vincent said. "You handle your assets beautifully."

"Can't let the goods get too damaged," Mobius said modestly.

"Of course, of course. But these Lokis, they’re ten a penny these days." Vincent's piercing gaze roamed Loki's face in naked fascination. "How long are you going to last, I wonder?"

"I hope that's a rhetorical question, Strange," Mobius said, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, looking uncomfortable all of a sudden. "You know that's above my pay grade."

Vincent tsk-tsked. “What’s taking you so long, Mobius? You need to climb up that ladder and climb it fast while you’ve still got Renslayer wrapped around your little finger.”

Mobius turned red. “I don’t - she and I - we’re not like that.”

"It's alright, Mobius,” Vincent interrupted him mid-sputter. “I can handle it from here."

"Are you sure?" Mobius asked sceptically. "Protocol says - "

"He doesn't pose any real danger," Vincent said mildly. "Look at him. He's harmless."

If the remark was meant to invoke a rise out of Loki, it fell short of the mark. To his credit, the former second prince of Asgard weathered the scrutiny with a poise that almost made Mobius proud. 

"Yes, Mobius. No harm will come to the good doctor," Loki promised. "Not today." 

"Did you hear that, Agent Mobius?" Vincent asked. "Best attend to your business and leave me to mine."

Mobius doubted it was the smartest thing to do, leaving the two men to their own devices, but what choice did he have? "I won't be long."

"Isn't that up to Judge Renslayer to decide?" Vincent asked impishly. "Tell her I will have the report on L1130 on her desk by the end of the day. And I will have to report you too for using the merchandise before proper inspection."

"Tell her yourself, jerk."

As soon as Mobius left, Vincent's wolfish smile sharpened. "He likes me. He just doesn't show it." 

Loki remained mute. 

"He likes you, that's for sure. I wonder why." Vincent tilted his head quizzically. "Why are you special? Why didn't they prune you?"

"Am I to answer any of those questions?" Loki asked politely.

"Oh, please don't. I was talking to myself and I don't like interruptions."

"My apologies."

"But it is indeed a curious thing. Do excuse me for saying this, but you're super ordinary," Vincent said critically. "Relatively speaking, of course."

"Met many Lokis, have you?" 

"I'm not complaining. You're easier to fix than most variants that pass through these doors,” Vincent said. “Your pieces are still in one piece. Mostly.”

True to his words, Vincent spent the next few minutes diligently cleaning the wound and suturing it with a deftness that bespoke decades of experience. He asked no questions about whom or what had inflicted the wound; it was clearly of no import to him.

The orchestral music in the background had died down, giving way to the dramatic tremolos of a familiar, haunting tune. A baritone soared and swelled above the trickling piano, rich and full. 

It was beautiful. Loki hated everything about it. How Vincent could hear anything through his stethoscope with all the noise was anyone's guess.

Loki tried to distract himself by focusing on his breathing. The stainless steel diaphragm burned like a thousand insects crawling underneath his skin.

But the song…the more time they spent not talking, the louder it became.

"Why do you listen to this drivel?" Loki asked, when he could stand the cacophony no longer.

Vincent did not answer immediately.

"It relaxes me," he said, once he had finished listening to Loki's chest. "What's the matter? I thought you, of all people, would appreciate my choice in music."

"Why would you think that?"

"The night you blinded that poor man in Stuttgart. The orchestra was playing this very piece."

"I don't remember it," Loki said flatly.

"I didn't expect you to," the doctor said with a shrug. "Selective amnesia is quite prevalent among you Variants."

Vincent pulled off his gloves and shoved his hands into his lab coat pockets, but not before Loki caught sight of the fine scars running down the back of the long, tapered fingers. 

As disfigured as they were, there was no mistaking the grace in them. They were a pianist’s hands, that much Loki could tell. “Do you play?”

Silence ensued. 

“What happened to your hands?” Loki pressed. 

Still Vincent said nothing.

Emboldened by the lack of response from the suddenly reticent man, Loki leaned forward eagerly.

“You taunt me, yet you deny me conversation. So much for a warm welcome, Doctor.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realise my hospitality has left something to be desired,” Vincent said sarcastically. “Would you like me to bring out some tea?”

“I wouldn't be opposed to that idea. Nor would I mind something a little more merry.” Loki made a face. “Schubert’s brilliant but his sonatas grew too despondent toward the end.”

“He died too young, left the world wanting for more."

"By contrast, live too long and you risk the world cursing your existence."

Either Loki’s relentless questions had angered him, or something in the song had triggered the doctor, as it did Loki. 

"Lucky for you the world has very poor memory,” Vincent said sharply. “History will forget you soon enough, Loki Laufeyson."

Loki lunged but Vincent was ready. One second, Loki had the doctor thrust against the wall, the very next, he was contorted on the floor, spasming in agony.

“I am Doctor Vincent Strange of the TVA.” 

Vincent towered over the writhing form. He retrieved his hand from his pocket and opened his fist, revealing the Time Twister in his grasp. “I am not your friend. I don't make small talk. And I certainly do not serve tea." 

He crouched down, studying the veins in Loki’s neck as they swelled, engorged from his prisoner’s vain effort to dislodge the time displacement collar. "You…are Der Leiermann.” 

“What?” 

“A sad, wretched man tinkering with his hurdy-gurdy at the very edge of the world, but no one wants to hear him. No one wants to look at him." 

Vincent bent to whisper in Loki’s ear. “Not even the dogs."

Tears blurred Loki's vision, hot and stinging.

Kill me. 

“Your life is in my hands. You are at my mercy. Do we understand each other?”

“Go to Hel,” Loki spat furiously.

Vincent's frozen demeanour cracked. A sad smile glimmered through, softening his features. "You poor thing.”

He thumbed the wetness dewing along Loki’s lashes and flicked the tears away. 

"Hell can't fit the both of us," he said gently. "And right now, you're in it."

Loki struggled against his invisible bonds but no matter how he roared and screamed and prayed, it went unheard. 

Schubert's Winterreise played on, sombre and never ending.

TBC

[notmuchtoconceal]

5/23/22

bro, today we're gonna talk about not talkin yourself out of a good idea.

bro, trust me on this -- lotta ideas you get are a lot better than you think they are.

when i was visiting lil bro his apartment flooded for he had angered enlil with one too many displays of haughty outward decadence. just lounging around, you know. being a buttboy. living in his own filth. attracting plague insects. never dustin the woodwork.

as we sat in the library to escape the mildew smell he said he was apparently afraid of cause without years of city living he hadn't acclimated to a potent enough level of toxicity in the atmosphere, he confessed to being boxed and trapped and inert between the walls of his own not very colorful bouncy castle.

i told him bro, it's cool. i'd help him rearrange all his furniture while i was there. he was a shrimp and i wanted to experiment on him live with a cooperative task. i asked him if he only invited me down here to help him clean his apartment. he said no, of course. almost offended that i'd even ask because he's a twerp who sometimes has less of a sense of humor than he should because he's secretly an evil woman and that's not me projecting.

we get back to his apartment, his shelves have collapsed from the moisture. cheap particle board. lil bro don't make good investments. does things half-assed at the last moment. he deserves punishment. the story-telling part of my brain wants to punish him cause it demands ruthless efficiency and i will punish myself and bare all my punishments gladly. right now, though -- i got this lil softie ice cream cone to deal with and i gotta lick him up before he melts and gets all sticky on my fingers. i'm not apologizing for the literate part of my brain being so casually abusive. it has high standards for a reason. i can't make myself less for you, you need to risk the fact that my love may destroy you cause that's what loving me looks like.

you want a ruthless taskmaster lil beta boy. your nerd self needs to be disciplined and guided and structured cause you're a dumb horny stink animal who will do nothing but suck my dick and sniff my pits if i don't smack you upside the head and tell u where to go.

ur playing a video game and don't kno where to go and ur running around in circles and i figured it out like five minutes ago and i should just be laughing at u and taunting u and making u give in faster so u can relinquish control to me -- but as cute and funny as u r when ur helpless, i need u to take care of me when i'm insane and u can't do that as a brainwashed obedient buttboy, so i need to make u man up and develop an independent capacity to decide, lil robot boy

he was under so much stress. bro, he's so sweet to me.

he's just like -- okay, i wanna buy you dinner now.

my insane ass is like -- you wanna fucking leave your apartment in this condition? it is my privilege and my continuous lament to become a cruel and void mirror of his every secretive despair for my visage was too terrible for him to look upon

so he looks down and goes o-o-okay.

[otter squeaks]

i wanted to buy you a twenty dollar bottle of wine at dinner, but i guess i'll do that another night.

then i make him put on his tight lil himbo shorts and clean the apartment with me.

i scrub his whole stove until it's too late for dinner so we go to his buddy's place and his buddy don't have anything and it's bed time for him anyway and lil bro offers to make me fried PB&J

i think, yes -- let's experiment on you further by making you make me PB&J. you want to cook for me. you want my body to recognize you as a safe and stable source of food so i don't eat you. perform this act and make me think of you as benevolent and maternal so i can weave another thread of incest into our sick dominance and narcissism based relationship, cute lil fuckhole animal brother.

bro, it's delicious -- the olive oil with the crunchy peanutbutter. the hint of sweet. goddamn. i want him to make it for me again another night, but he has no bread, which under normal circumstances would be a huge red flag. he had two or three bottles of wine but no bread. that's a whole lotta body and not a lotta blood. is this a metaphor for how he will inevitably be left less than a husk by his ravenous carnal appetites? why are you so disgusted by human flesh? are other minds unfathomably violent and insipid? are you even capable of love?

anyway, he has no bread, but he has rice. I say use the rice. he says that could be delicious or it could be awful. he don't know. he has no idea. he's scared. i just tell him to trust me. trust me. trust me. i tell him to trust me. it's cool. he trusts me. i let him trust me. it's fun.

it's fuckin delicious. tastes like mashed up PBJ. the rice is the right texture, it was a little crispy from being on the bottom of the pan. totally same effect just slightly looser texture. i love it.

next day he buys bread and i make him make me three.

i can taste the lack of love when mass produced.

now i wait. ready to eat some more.

point is, just do the thing.

it's fun.

[shadowbunnydragon]

To Russell, Sarah, Lily, Bailey, Walter: How was your first Christmas in the new world and with your new families for some?

Russel: "Before I came here, Christmas was kinda... tense... or even something with a lot of screaming... But Christmas with the Spitz's was awesome! I got to help set up the strings of lights around the outside of the house in the days leading up! There were gifts for me and my new foster brothers and sisters waiting for us under the tree! After opening them, we all went outside and made snow mammals. Erik and Roger and Jackson came over, and we all had a snowball fight! Mrs. Spitz made cookies and hot chocolate for everyone, and we all spent time with each other in the living room, a warm fire going in the fireplace! It was like something out of a dream... I never thought I could ever have a Christmas like that..."

Sarah: "Oh! Mommy and Daddy made me and Elijah and Elliot our own matching sweaters! Mommy made mine thicker though, 'cause she was worried I'd get colder 'cause I don't have fur. Then, on Christmas, me and my big brothers got to get up and see what Santa brought us! He got me a pretty pink princess castle with little dollies that go inside! Elijah got a cool toy tank that transforms into a robot with a sword! And Elliot loves his new paint supplies! I'm real glad that Santa could find me this year! Mama, my old mama from before, told me that Santa always got lost before getting to our house. And that's why I never got any presents on Christmas before." Happily plays with a bright pink castle while Mr. and Mrs. Otterton exchange a worried look behind her.

Lily: "It was just so lovely. Renato and I exchanged gifts, and even found ourselves under the mistletoe quite a few times... though I think that a certain sly feline was simply moving it when I wasn't looking... not that I mind. We stayed in bed... ahem... cuddling before finally heading out for a picnic out in this lovely oasis in Sahara Square that is actually right against the district border with Tundratown, and rather pleasantly cool, compared to the rest of the scorching desert. There, we FaceChatted with Renato's family, who couldn't make it out to Zootopia this year. We're thinking of making the Christmas picnic a fun little tradition for us, and bringing the rest of his family along next year!"

Baily: "Sophia invited me over to her family home for Christmas, and I got to enjoy a large home-cooked meal with her family. Keith really knows how to make a turkey! Leodore showed up late with Sophia's aunt, and got a bit... tipsy. He proceeded to offend a few of Sophia's family, before he started... sobbing and then left... only to pass out in the bushes right outside the front door... But aside from that, it was just the best Christmas I can ever remember!"

Walter: "Christmas is actually a pretty... lonely time of year for me normally. But this year... Jack kinda invited himself... and all his family over to my place... without telling me first. He did so when he found out about my plans to just spend the holiday alone... and then pretty much just broke in to let a swarm of hares inside to decorate and bring food and gifts. Granted, the Savages are all really nice and... definitely not cute. Nope, not at all. And apparently Jack invited Skye over and proceeded to set up mistletoe in strategic locations for her and him to 'casually' walk under. Overall... it was nice."

[abnormaldemigod]

Do I have an attachment??? (help)

Hi guys!!! I'm AbnormalDemigod!!!

A little about me...

Hi, I'm a 16-year-old girl in Alberta Canada. I love cats, Harry Potter, and true crime. I'm an introvert and want to be a fantasy writer later in life.

So, this is my VERY FIRST post and the reason I logged into Tumblr was to connect with people I'll probably never meet and to share my thoughts and stuff.

Anyway...I'm into paranormal ghost-hunting stuff, (if stuff like that makes you uncomfortable, pls don't read this, I don't want to offend anyone. ) Okay so...things have been happening. I first discovered paranormal stuff about two years ago, I thought it was really cool and it definitely wasn't something I had ever been exposed to before. The first time I really thought anything was strange was only a few months ago. I was asleep, it was early morning and I was kind of floating in and out of sleep. I could feel this weight on the side of my bed, almost like someone was sitting there and there was also this strong feminine presence. It wasn't threatening or anything like that, it was just there, almost like it was waiting for something. I don't know how long this went on, but eventually, I heard my mum coming down the hall to wake me up. Just like that the presence was gone but I was kind of annoyed because I'd wanted to sleep peacefully before my mum woke me up: like somewhere in my subconscious I'd registered that there was another person in the room with me. It wasn't until later in the day that I realized how weird that was and I freaked.

I talked to both my siblings and asked them if they'd been watching me sleep for some reason and they both said no. I knew it hadn't been my mum because she'd come into my room almost eminently after the presence left and it wasn't my dad because, as I said, this was a very feminine presence. After thinking it through I reasoned it was either a figment of my imagination or a ghost of some kind. I was hesitant about that theory though. Our house is new, we're the first people to own it and we live in a really quiet neighborhood. I couldn't come up with a logical explanation for a haunting. But when I was little, five or six, we lived in a different house. It was older, maybe fifty years and I have some very vivid, very weird memories of it. When I went to sleep at night, I'd hear these voices. Most of the time they were whispering but sometimes I'd hear my name. I didn't think much of it being only a little kid at the time.

I'd also have these nightmares, like really horrible ones. I was only a little kid and I'd never watched a scary movie in my life. The most vivid, the one I can actually recall a decent amount of memories from happened twice. Both times were identical and part of me knew that it was happening twice but I couldn't alter the dream. In the dream, I was in the basement of our house. It was unfinished with bare concrete walls and a dirty floor with a few lightbulbs hanging from the ceiling. More of a prison than a basement really. I was down there with my older brother, (I don't have an older brother so I don't know where my dream self got one from,) and we were playing together. Then, all of a sudden rats started appearing. Like, thousands of them. They came out of the walls, the ceiling, the floor. I screamed as they started biting my feet and my older brother lifted me up to keep me away from them but they started crawling up his legs and biting him too. We were running in circles yelling and more rats just kept on coming. That's all I can remember.

The second dream that really scared me, and the only time I couldn't wake myself up from a dream was about a year later. It was a dark room and there was a huge black cat with green eyes staring at me. It must have been about five feet tall. As a little kid, I often had dreams about cats growing to huge sizes and attacking me. A lot of the time I couldn't even scream. As the black cat came towards me I tried to run away. I knew I was asleep and I wanted to wake up but I couldn't. I remember it feeling like clawing my way through thick black fabric that was suffocating me.

We moved out of that house when I was seven and onto a small acreage. The dreams stopped and I mostly forgot about them. It's only in the last few months that I've started to wonder if there's a paranormal attachment hanging around from that house. After that presence on the edge of my bed not much else happened. Not until we went on a family holiday to a heritage town not far from my grandparent's place. The town consists of old refurbished buildings left over from the start of the 21st century. It was a mining town and after the gold rush ended it turned into a ghost town. Anyway, I and my sister were looking through some of the surviving houses. She was slightly ahead of me and entered first. I had just stepped through the doorway when she looked at me and said, "The door handle was just rattling,"

I couldn't believe it. I'd never had a paranormal phenomenon this clear before. Now, I'm not a very empathetic person. I can't sense what people are feeling very well which makes me a bit socially awkward. But my sister is really attuned to stuff like that. I asked her if she felt anything in the house. Was there a sad or happy feeling? Did she get chills? She wasn't sure, and to be honest she's not really comfortable with that kind of stuff so I didn't want to push her. Still, she did tell me that she couldn't help but think of the people who used to live here. How they're all dead now. She also told me was all she could think about was a little girl playing on the carpet in the living room. She had brown hair and eyes and looked a lot like a woman in a painting in the house. Again, my sister is uncomfortable with this sort of thing but I think its possible for her to be a medium. What do you guy's think?

Throughout the rest of the trip, I couldn't get the door handle out of my head. I couldn't believe that I had been that close to something otherworldly. There were a few times when I'd feel something close by, a sort of presence behind me. I'd also get chills down one side of my body which was really weird. The holiday ended and life continued. About a week after we got back our oven broke. That wasn't an object of concern, it was old and we called an appliance store in the nearest city to us, it's about 45 min away. But they don't service people more than 30 min away so we had to find someone else. We found someone who would come out and on the day he was meant to come to our house to look at the oven, he didn't show up. No phone call, no email, nothing. A few days later we find out he's in the hospital. Well, that was weird but stuff like that happens. About a week later a friend tells us that her uncle fixes appliances in a small town near us. We call him. A meeting is scheduled. It's going to be fine. On the day he is meant to arrive....we get a call telling us that he's in the hospital with blood poisoning. That's two people coming to help us who ended up in the hospital within a month. Is that just really bad luck or is this some sort of negative energy?

Either way, I'm fairly certain that something going on and it's scary. I don't want to bring it up with my parents because they don't believe in this sort of thing.

Anyway, that all I've got for now!!!

See yall later!!!✌️✌️✌️

[extinctdreamdiary]

Ya boi got Dumped

Long story.

It really was for the best, and I had been planning to break up with them for a hot minute because we are NOT well aligned and I had grown to resent them instead of having ~feelings~ for them.

We got together a few years ago and it was nice. I didn't realise at the time that I was putting in all the effort, but I was. We have totally different needs/love languages. Mine is doing favours/giving things, theirs is touch. We're both autistic so I don't love long periods of touch and I thought they were the same because after we moved in together for financial reasons they insisted on having their own room and expressed that they didn't really like sharing a bed.

Anyway recently they expressed they were touch starved and unfortunately there wasn't much I could do about it, so them dumping me was best for them.

Why was it good for me? My ex is a 'Chik-fil-a queer'. They bought the hogw4rts legacy game and didn't tell any of the friend group about it despite being a generally bubbly and oversharey type of person who likes to talk about themself (to a fault, another gripe but not a huge deal as they're neurodivergent and can't help it), specifically because all of the group are queer people and would be offended. However they have an online friend group about HP fanfiction that they were probably very excited to share it with them-- I don't know, none of us have ever been introduced to them in any way. They have stated that HP was one of the few enjoyable parts of their childhood and they just didn't want to let it go despite that I could say exactly the same and JKR successfully put me off the fandom. They also bought J4mes Ch4rles products after all that individual has done but 'it was ok because it was on clearance' ????

This year they are going on an overseas trip to meet their friend group and have been so strict with money so as to not pay for their groceries. We haven't said anything before to keep the peace but I expect we will be now. If it pushes them to move out living will be EXTREMELY lean for the rest of us.

Having experienced an abusive childhood and overbearing parenting, they value their independence a lot, and it took me a little while to get used to not being a 'normal' couple and while we planned a future together, they would never accept my input on any life decisions except living together. In the beginning we talked casually about kids and agreed that if we had them, we'd adopt them, as I in particular feel strongly that we should adopt over making children. It wasn't long before they changed their mind and expressed that they were going to have their own kid, with their own body, because it was easier. I can not fertilise them so they were just going to have casual sex with randoms. They also weren't interested in my or anyone else's input in parenting, they wanted the kid all to themself like the kid wouldn't be an actual person with the need to know who their other parent is and where they came from. THAT was the point at which I decided that when I was financially independent I would be leaving them.

All in all I feel like the whole relationship they didn't think much about anyone else's feelings, despite being supportive during my lowest points, which I will always be extremely thankful for because otherwise I would have been alone. And despite resolving to break up with them when it was convenient to me, being broken up with has still hurt. In the days leading up to it they had suddenly become very very withdrawn and they lash out in anger when they're going through it, another thing I had absolutely no idea how to deal with. The breakup speech itself was very amiable and I really had nothing to say. Now their mood is back to normal like they're just happy to have got shot of me and I also feel like I can't talk to our mutual friends about it, in part because I've been sort of trained out of venting to people due to one other friend that would always tell me to 'go do something about it then', they wouldn't necessarily get my reasons for wanting out and anyway, why am I upset if I wanted out anyway? My ex is back in the group chat like normal. I've muted it. I owe my ex a little money and as I'm only working part time all my extra cash is going to paying them back as quickly as I can so I can be done with it. Once I've paid it back I'm going to start going to therapy because LORD knows everybody in this situation needs it.

[bestruction]

Falling in love with a marleyan pt.2

N/A: It was really hard to write for Eren because of all of his background. That’s why I’m insecure about this one. I hope you can enjoy 

You can read the part 1 here 

- Eren Jaeger 

After the war that started in Marley because of the failure of the founding titan's mission, the government sent marleyan nurses to the hospital of the Liberio District. Since many people had died on the battlefield, it would take some time for the eldian medical unit to fully recover.

You were one of them.

It wasn't your first time taking care of war survivors, but putting your feet inside the district's central hospital and seeing all those poor souls made your heart sink in your chest. The atmosphere was heavy, especially since the other nurses who were with you saw no reason to care for and treat eldians.

What was the purpose of the war? This? More blood and hatred?

You were in charge of caring for the patients in ward B. After a long day cleaning your patients' psychological and physical wounds, you felt relief when you reached the last one.

"Mr. Kruger" was what the chart said and notes below about his amnesia, left eye, and leg.

"Good night, Mr. Kruger"

"Good night, nurse"

"You can call me by my name," You said, pointing to the badge on your chest. "We're going to see each other a lot from now on"

He looked at your face and then at your arm, noticing the lack of the armband.

"You are marleyan" he stated

"Yes, I am" You pulled up a stool to sit "Have you had any pain in your left eye or in your leg?"

"No, nurs-" he interrupted himself and looked at your badge before completing the sentence with your name.

"That's good. Please look at my index finger"

You moved your finger from side to side to test his reflexes.

“I'll need to change the bandages on your leg to make sure it is healing well, and the next week, we will look at your eye ”

He nodded, and you bent down to undo the bandages wrapped around the man's leg. To your surprise, there were no scars or even stitch marks.

"You must have an incredible body, Mr. Kruger" you exclaimed, touching his knee looking for any signs of injury "It's almost as if it's regenerating"

"It would be incredible if that were possible"

"Yes of course! It's just my imagination"

Carefully, you bandaged his leg again. Since he said that he would feel better even if he didn't need to. Of all your patients that day, the man with the long brown hair seemed to have something different about him. He was not in paranoia or outlined any kind of stress, but probably thanks to his amnesia.

You helped him sit down, undress for the bath, sit in the wheelchair, and waited at the door until he was finished to help him get dressed again.

That was your first night with Eren Kruger, one very similar to that of the other patients.

The week dragged on at the Central Hospital of Liberio. In the afternoon, it was time to take the most mentally stable patients for a walk around, and as the days passed and repeated, the more you watched Kruger.

Even during the afternoon hours, he did not walk around like the rest. Unlike other patients with amnesia, he didn't even try to search for a loved one or recover some memory. He was unusual, and you were curious.

Every day, you went to his room to perform the same procedure.

"Good night, Mr. Kruger" You greeted him after entering his room, and he responded by saying your name.

"You look tired"

"Is that your way of telling me that I've been prettier?"

You placed his dinner tray on the small, simple table there and sat next to him on the bed.

"No, just tired, but still beautiful"

You smiled at him more than you would like.

"I will test your reflexes as usual and then I will assist you in the shower as usual"

He was always your last patience. He was the best in health and with whom you talked the most.

"Aren't you going to let me see your eye yet?" You asked, helping him to take off his coat.

"You said it wasn’t necessary since I didn’t feel pain"

You shrugged. He probably didn't want to show it because of vanity.

"It is a pity. I really like the color ”

"Why you say that?"

"What do you mean?"

"I'm an eldian, but unlike other nurses, you don't seem to be disgusted by your work"

"Why would I, Mr. Kruger?" You asked, unbuttoning the last button on his shirt "I'm sure the blood runs here" You said, placing a hand on his chest "It's the same one that runs here"  and completed placing his hand on your chest "We are the same ”

You didn't notice, but Eren Kruger frowned before pulling your hand away abruptly. At that moment, you thought you were over the line. A silence fell over the two of you after such a simple sentence. That was how the night ended, with you two in silence.

Honestly, Eren Kruger had not been offended by your words but intimidated. The last thing he expected to hear from a marleyan was something like that. Eren was intimidated by your kindness.

Kruger was not just your patient. After that few months, he was your friend as well. It was not easy for you to establish a relationship with the other nurses. The marleyan who came with you avoided you because they saw the way you treated the eldians. The eldian nurses did not know what to expect from you, so they kept their distance. He was the only person you could talk to. After what happened, you were afraid that you had ruined things between you. So in an attempt to apologize, the next day, you took a chessboard to entertain him. It was a simple thing, but it was what the hospital protocol allowed.

When Eren saw you enter the bedroom door carrying the dinner as usual and a box, he thanked you for the poor lighting, or maybe you'd have noticed the blush that appeared on his cheeks when he heard you saying "Good night"

He answered you, but he did not look you in the eye. You left the tray of food on the bed and dragged the wooden table in the room to the front of him.

"I thought we could play a little bit" You suggested showing the box.

"It would be a great idea"

You set up the board on the table after dinner, and in silence, you started playing. You were surprised at how strategist the man in front of you proved to be and even more when he won the game.

“I bet you were a great soldier in the war. Why no one comes after you?"

He remained silent, and you sighed.

“I know I made you uncomfortable yesterday, but it was not my intention, Mr. Kruger. I hope you can forgive me ”

Eren looked at you and blinked a few times.

"You didn't ... You didn't do anything wrong" He ran a hand through his hair "I didn't expect to find someone like you in a place like this"

"Well, I didn't expect to find someone like you either"

The silence fell over you two again, but this time in a cozy way.

"Let me prepare you for your bath"

You took off his coat, unbuttoned his shirt, helped him remove his pants, and sit in the wheelchair before taking you to the bathroom.

Everything as on other days, just like with the other patients. So why did your heartbeat so fast against your chest?

"Good night, Mr. Kruger," You said about to leave the room.

"Eren"

"Hm?"

"Please call me Eren"

"Yes...Good night, Eren"

Your foolish heart was beating so fast that you could barely sleep through the night. The blood hit the walls, reverberating his name in your head, and the same happened with the eldian lying in his bed meters from you.

Time passed quietly, with the two of you talking during the afternoon outings and his daily checks. Eren loved those moments. Being with you brought back a part of him that he thought he lost some time ago.

You made that place without colors, the closest thing he could call home.

You liked how things were between you, but you were afraid.

Nothing good would come from a relationship that shouldn't exist, and you would be sent back to your city soon. So there was nothing to do about it. You thought Eren Kruger would become a good memory, and maybe he would have if you hadn't noticed him handing a letter to Falco.

The moment you saw him hand the paper over to the boy, it all made sense. So he didn't try to find out who he was because he already knew, but why stay in the hospital? Why pretend amnesia? Why send a letter if he didn't seem to want to come back?

When you went to take his dinner that night, you were nervous. How to start a conversation like this? Should you even bring it up?

"Are you okay?" He asked, taking you out of your daydreams

"Yes, just thinking about something"

"About what?" He asked, taking a tablespoon to his mouth

You swallowed hard and, without further ado, asked:

"You don't really have amnesia, do you?" Eren stopped the spoon in his mouth and waited for you to continue. “I saw you handing a letter to that boy, Falco. You wouldn’t send letters if you didn’t remember who you are ”

He put the silverware on a plate and stared at you.

"And what are you going to do about it?"

"What I'm going to do…? What do you think I'm going to do? Tell the hospital board? ” You sat next to him “It hurts me that you lose faith in our friendship for so little. I would never do that, Eren. If you don't want to go back… ”You took his hand in yours“ You must have your reasons. I just don't want you to have to lie to me ”

"I wish I didn't have to lie to you, too"

He intertwined your fingers with his own and patted the back of your hand briefly. You were close enough for your legs to touch each other.

Eren raised his free hand to your chin and lifted it towards his face. The months of tension between the two of you succumbed to a calm, slow, almost frightened kiss.

"Sorry. I shouldn't… ”

Eren stumbled over the words. He didn't want to force himself on you.

You knew how wrong it was. Ethically and logically, but none of that seemed to matter. So, you kissed him back.

"I want to kiss you too, Eren" You whispered between the kiss

Eren smiled without breaking the contact. How long had he been since he smiled like that?

The kiss started a spark that turned into a fire of desire. None of you dared to stop or even wanted to. Eren kissed you as if it were the first and last time as if he was afraid to let you go. His hands went down to your back, undoing the apron knot, and yours did the same with the shirt buttons. You removed the usual coat he was wearing and right after the shirt. He pulled you into his lap, squeezing your waist. You had to hold back a groan as you felt his erection against your clothed core.

Eren put his hands on the front buttons of your dress and looked at your eyes carefully. Those jade eyes were looking for your permission. You kissed him again, touched by his concern, and got up from his lap.

You undid the buttons on your dress and took off your underwear, leaving you naked. That was the consent he was looking for.

"You're..." He searched for words looking at your face, at your body "Beautiful"

This time, you saw him blush. Eren had never seen a naked woman, more than that, he was sure he had never met a woman like you.

He undid his belt, and you helped him take off his pants before accepting the invitation to return to his lap. To be honest, he didn't quite know what to do, and if you think he was flushed before, you should have seen his face lying on your shoulder when he said:

"I don't know what to do exactly ..."

So you took one of his hands and guided it to the middle of your legs.

"Here" He pressed his finger above your clit "Move your finger in circles"

He did as you said, and he had to restrain himself not to cum at the exact moment you moaned.

"Keep...Agh...Doing it, Eren"

Eren felt an adrenaline rush up his spine and his cock throb when he heard you say his name like that. He wanted more. See more, learn your reactions, and listen to you say his name like this more often.

That night left a mark on you two forever. There was no turning back. Not because of sex, but because you fell in love with Eren, and he fell in love with you long before that.

Thinking about the afterward was something you avoided, but when your period didn't come a second time. You knew it was necessary.

You planned to apply for permanent leave to work as a nurse in the Liberio District and somehow get Eren out of the hospital. You could live in a more remote part of the district without attracting attention and, if necessary, would use one of the eldian armbands. That way, you would only be more of a couple among many. After all, the government would not bother to investigate the life of a nurse.

You were happy despite everything, but that was until you told him.

"Are you ... What?"

"I’m pregnant"

"Is it mine?"

You opened your eyes wide when you heard the question.

"Excuse me? What are you trying to say? ” You controlled yourself not to raise the voice “Of course it’s yours” You completed feeling a lump forming in your throat.

“That wasn’t part of the plan,” He said more to himself than you“You were not part of the plan” Eren rested his hands on his knees and lowered his head.

You wanted to cry. Not for him, but for trusting him, for making plans for the two of you.

“So this is how it will be? God ... I'm such an idiot ”

Eren looked at your figure with slumped shoulders and closed countenance. He hated himself for causing your smile to end. He hated himself for being not the man you deserved and needed, but he wouldn't leave you by yourself.

Even though he couldn't be that man.

"Don’t go out of hospital tonight" He said breaking the silence. "Under no circumstances go to the speech today"

"What? Why?"

"Promise me you won't, please"

"Eren, you are not making sense"

"Please" He begged you seriously

"Okay"

He told you to wait on the hospital terrace. He would come to pick you up, and once again, you trusted him.

It was difficult to watch the confusion that happened in the hospital. Countless wounded and killed. You never forgot the horror stuck in those people's eyes, and doing nothing to help make you feel guilty.

Is that why he told you not to go? If so, how did he know what was going to happen? Why did he know?

You were about to come down to help when a short-haired woman appeared on the terrace saying your name. If you were confused before by not knowing what was going on, now even more.

"Who are you?"

"Eren asked me to pick you up"

"He told me he would come"

She held out her hand with a tender face that you couldn't decipher.

“You will understand everything. Now come on, we don’t have much time to reach others ”

The wind was blowing hard on the terrace. You thought about refusing, going down, and helping the patients. At that time, you were no longer sure if you knew who Eren Kruger, the father of your child, was. You wouldn't know if it was for fear of what could happen if you stayed or for the love you felt for Eren, but you accepted her hand.

You climbed on the airship with that woman.  The pairs of eyes there were looking at you with as much curiosity as you to them. You hated the feeling of being the only one in the dark, the only one not knowing what was going on.

"We'd better keep an eye on her"

"She doesn't know anything" You heard Eren say without looking at you "She wasn't part of the plan"

"No? So why did you ask to pick her up? ” Asked the man without taking his eyes off you

"She’s pregnant with my child"

All the heads in the room turned to you.

"It seems that conspiring was not the only thing he did during that time"

You had so many questions, but there was no time for any of them right now.

Finding out that Eren Kruger was actually Eren Jaeger was like a punch in the gut. The army agreed to accommodate you, and in return, Eren would be imprisoned since he could leave if he wanted to. The woman who came to pick you up on the terrace answered all your questions and explained the current situation. You didn't know what to say, just that you needed to talk to him.

It took a while, but after so much insisting, the survey corps commander agreed to let the two of you talk under her supervision.

Eren was sitting on the bed when you stopped in front of the cell with Hange at your side. He didn't look at you, and he didn't think he could do it too.

"Eren?" You called him, putting your face between the bars "What does all this mean?" You asked even though he knew the answer "You lied to me"

You didn't want to cry, but how could you not? Especially being more sensitive because of the pregnancy.

"Eren ... why?" A sob cut you off “Now I don't know who you are, I can't go home, and is that all you have to say? Nothing? Eren! ” You hit the bars causing a loud bang.

“Try to stay calm. You can't be exasperated because of the baby, ”said Hange, touching your shoulder.

Eren got up from the bed and went to you. You looked deep into his green eyes, now understanding why he never let you take off the bandages, why he didn't have scars.

“I didn't lie about everything” He rested his forehead over yours on the bars “I know this is hard to believe right now, but I'm not going to leave you by yourself. That’s why I asked Mikasa to pick you up ”

For an instant, you saw the Eren who spent his days in the hospital there in front of you. He wiped away your tears and whispered an apology accompanied by your name before kissing your forehead and apologizing again.

It was unfair how your heart sped at the mere touch of him. Foolish heart.

Falling in love and having a child never crossed Eren's mind when he went to Marley. He didn't feel like he deserved you and even less your love. Several times he wanted to tell you everything, but how?

Hange looked at her watch and said that the time was over. Eren took your cheeks in his hands and whispered looking into your eyes.

“I wasn't lying when I said I loved you. I love you"

Hange took you back to your room and asked if you would accept that she questioned you about your time with Eren. She had waited until the moment she judged it right due to your pregnancy.  As a way to repay all her kindness you accepted.

Eren could have said he wouldn't leave you alone, but while you were telling what happened during that time in a country you didn't know, in a room that wasn't yours and pregnant with a man you weren't sure you knew more about, you felt more alone than ever.

[smutember]

Smutember 2021 prompts are here!

And we're back to make 2021 slightly more smutty! Thank you to all people, who asked for it to return and to all that submitted propositions of prompts. Three months should be looong enough for you to create all the smuttiness you can think of.

Rules

All posts have to be tagged with either smutember or smutember2021 hashtag (preferably both). Be aware that ns fw tag is shadowed, and posts with it are not visible in the tags. I personally suggest the revived old lemon tag. it wouldn’t hurt to @ this blog, so that your post won’t be missed, especially if your blog is new and still not shown in the tag.

No minor/underage content.

All submissions have to be at least somewhat smutty/naughty. We don’t require hard Explcit rating, a Mature one is fine too.

If you are planning on posting suggestive pics/drawings, remember that tumblr still has the ridiculous p0rn filter, so I suggest cropping the pic and adding links to external sites.

If your work contain kinks that may offend some, please tag them either in the tags, or in the body of the work.

Prompts are merely suggestions - at the end of the day, you are the one who chooses how to interpret the prompt. You can also completely ignore the prompts and have your own 30-day challenge, we’re not gonna call the internet police on you.

And in case they weren’t clear, here is a list of prompts with explanations and some propositions:

Strip Poker - cards on the table.. and maybe some clothes too. Sexy games and bets galore.

Oral - pretty self-explanatory :)

"Watcha starin' at?" - One person catches the other dressing? Or are they just peeping Toms? Your call!

Gangbang - anything related to threesomes/moresomes/ sex parties/orgies, etc. The more, the merrier.

Public sex - cos the world NEEDS to know you are in love... and remember, it's not illegal if police doesn't catch you.

In the kitchen - some call it boring and cliché, but at the same time, those countertops are at perfect height... Just make sure to the pasta doesn't overboil

Putting on a show - striptease? Cam show? Filming? Roleplay with fancy costumes? So many ways to express yourself.

Against a wall - Vertical is new horizontal. Classic case of a quickie... or just because the beds have not arrived yet.

In a vehicle - Time to rev up those engines. They say car sex is difficult, but you will find a way. Or maybe it's a spaceship? Or someone joined the mile high club? Just don't idle too much...

Hot tub - Is it hot because of the water, or because you are in there? All sorts of bathroom-related shenanigans, not necessarily in the tub itself.

Nature date - Time to return to the nature... doing it au naturel? In the forest? On top of a mountain? The whole world can be a bed if you are creative enough.

Romantic gesture - that's how it starts, with flowers and chocolates... but what happens after? And what if it fails?

Fantasy - We all have them, and so do our characters. All the roleplays, scenarios and AUs suddenly may be real.

"YES!" - That's what you will be screaming... or maybe that's all you can say, agreeing to every decision for a night?

The clock's ticking - Quickie before the boss catches you... or maybe because the world's gonna end tomorrow. Anything that makes love-making time-sensitive.

Secret rendezvous - sneaking away for a date always makes the heart pump blood faster.

Experiments - trying new kinks? New positions? Role reversal? Try it here for free!

Skinny dipping - any beach is a nudist beach if you are brave enough!

Facial - sex is messy, and it's time to embrace it. Anything related to the stckier part of love-making.

Formal wear - sometimes imagining what's underneath is part of fun. Dresses, suits, costumes, fancy parties and balls goes here.

Porno playlist - we gotta have soundtrack for the love-making. Anything related to music or ambient sounds goes here. Feel free to create said playlists!

Celebration night - time to pen bottle of champagne and celebrate.... and you decide what! Maybe even the fact that there is time to celebrate....

"You don't do that with a fruit!" - Insert peach and aubergine emoji here. Food play, aphrodisiacs, or maybe creative use of cucumbers...

Body warmth - Oh no! We're snowed in and HAVE to share a bed! What a... horror. Time-tested tropes of cuddling and being close together, always a good start for something bigger.

Breeding grounds - Time to expand the family... or maybe celebrate the expansion. Impregnation, pregnant sex, breeding fantasies go here.

Bondage - Fifty shades of please look up how it's done and use a safeword properly.

Blindfolds - close your eyes... and let other other senses guide you. From actual blindfolds, through sex in the darkness, to audiovisual deprivation.

Dirty talk - Use your adults words... a lot of them. Pre-sex or post-coital to start another round, oral is not the only way of making use of that tongue.

Wish come true - It finally happened! More fantasies and magical moments, only you decide what was that secret desire of your characters...

Free day - Didn’t enjoy the prompts? Or have you enjoyed them too much and have more ideas? Use this as a wildcard to express your creativity. Anything goes here, as long as you tag it.

And here are the raw list of prompts submitted:

strip poker

striptease, oral, gangbang, public sex, experimenting/ "Try Everything". There's probably more, but that's off the top of my head :)

something where one partner plays with themselves while the other is watching? Not quite voyeurism since they're both together. I don't know what to call it- "presenting" or "putting on a show" maybe?

sex against a wall; in a vehicle; bath or hot tub; out in nature; romantic gesture fails (but then doesn't); wish come true; Yes day (person A agrees to say yes to person B's requests for a whole day); time crunch/quickie; secret rendezvous.

skinny dipping, stripping, sex club

formal wear, pregnant sex

An inappropriate or inconvenient location requiring some discretion or creativity

Sexy Spotify Playlist! Or Makeout Music. Celebration Night (like a holiday, or birthday or anniversary. I'm bad at naming things). "You don't do that with fruit!" "Why is there porno music playing?"

Fishhooking, body warmth/heat, wet t-shirts

Multiple husbands/wives

My prompt are BONDAGE and BLINDFOLD and TEEN ANTICS.

Facial, Fantasy, Dirty Talk

cockwarming, mirror, cam show

in the kitchen; from behind; mile high club; skinny dipping; heat of the moment; summer fling; same time next year (meet same place/time every year or period of time); some repeats could be good too, oral, foreplay, fantasy, etc.

(Prompt for smutember) "Whatcha staring at, nothing to see here"

[emmlovesmarvel]

Chapter 10 - I Need You, Moms

Lena POV

I wake up to Lennox sitting up, gasping for air. It's still dark so it must be the middle of the night. I also see Kara awake, trying to calm Lennox down.

"S-she k-killed both of you." Lennox sobs. She doesn't seem to be responding well to touch, so Kara and I try our best to keep our distance when all we want to do is hold her.

"What, baby?" I say asking to clarify.

"Lillian. She killed you and then Kara. I just stood there and couldn't do anything." She cries, still trying to even her breathing.

"It's okay, honey. We're both right here. We're okay." Kara coos.

"Lennox, baby, can we touch you?" I offer.

She nods slowly and I don't hesitate to pull her into my lap and hold her while Kara strokes her back. I stay holding her, hoping she will go back to sleep. She stops crying and I can hear her breathing evening out, but her eyes are open, full of fear. She's trying to stay awake.

"Len, it's okay. You can go back to sleep. We're right here. We won't leave, okay?" I whisper into her hair.

"I can't. I'm too scared." She admits, voice cracking. "C-could I take a shower? I feel gross." She asks.

"Of course, sweetheart. Do you need help?" Kara asks getting off the bed.

"Y-yes. Is that okay? I'm sorry I know you guys were sleeping." She says ashamed.

"No, honey don't apologize. Of course we will help. Our top priority from now on is you, okay my love?" I ask making sure she understands.

"Okay. Thank you." She says getting off the bed and lets Kara guide her to the bathroom.

Kara helps take Lennox's PJs off and starts the shower. Lennox flinches as Kara goes to lift her shirt.

"Hey, it's okay. It's just me, my love. I will never hurt you." Kara reassures.

Lennox nods, "Sorry. I didn't mean to." She says sadly.

"It's okay, honey. I understand. But Lena and I will never hurt you, okay? If you need us to take it slow with the physical touch, you can tell us."

"N-no, I love your hugs and kisses. It just might take me a second to get acclimated again."

I'm so impressed by her. She knows her own needs and responses to things that a lot of people don't figure out until later in their lives.

"Well good, because we love kissing and hugging you, cuddle bug." I say kissing her head, making her smile.

Kara helps her into the shower and she winces at the water drops hitting her body. Her back is covered in bruises so being in here will probably hurt before it starts to soothe. I start washing her hair and try not to cry at how sad she looks. Just when she was starting to heal and move past what she went through, her same offenders took her and hurt her worse than ever before.

She breaks my thoughts when she says, "Thank you for being so gentle."

"Of course, baby. Is it okay if Kara scrubs your body, gently?" I ask and she nods looking at Kara.

I see tears stream down Kara's face as she tries not to hurt Lennox.

We finish up in the shower and I help her step out while Kara wraps her in a towel. We guide her back to the bed and sit her down while I grab her fresh PJs. I slip her shirt on and she winces when I accidentally graze her ribs. "I'm so sorry, baby! I didn't mean to, I'm sorry." I say kissing her head.

"It's okay, Lee I know you didn't mean to. I trust you." She says looking into my eyes and I nod.

We all lay back in bed and she leans on Kara who wraps her arm around her waist. Her arm is interlocked with mine.

"I'm sorry you guys have to take care of me. You didn't ask for it." Lennox says softly.

"Don't apologize, Len. We love you and can't imagine our lives without you here. When I took you in, both of our lives changed for the better. Kara and I are finally together because of you. I have missed you for 6 years. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else." I say kissing her temple.

"You don't understand, though." She says looking up at me.

"What don't we understand, honey?" Kara asks.

"W-when I was with Lillian. She said she had a new serum to try on me. The last serum, when I was 6, didn't work because my DNA wasn't compatible. Now that I fully understand what CADMUS was, I was wondering why she was experimenting on me. I'm not an alien." She pauses. "I overheard Lillian say that Lena's DNA wasn't compatible." She looks up at me with tears brimming. I put together that Lennox isn't Lillian's daughter. She's mine.

"Lena, you're my mother. I was created with your DNA, not Lillian's. I was so mad that she would use your DNA without your consent, because now you have a whole child that you're taking care of and you didn't even ask to!" She says angrily.

While I am upset at Lillian for using my DNA without asking me, I couldn't be happier to know that Lennox is mine.

"Hey, hey Lennox. Yes, what Lillian did was wrong and she won't get away with it, but I couldn't be happier to know that you are mine. I love you so much Lennox. Even though I didn't initially expect to start raising a child I didn't know was mine, it doesn't change how I feel now. I love you. I want to take care of you. I want to be your mother. You are everything and more I could ever want in a child." I say and she breaks down into tears. I hold her and let her cry. I see Kara has tears in her eyes too.

"Lennox, did Lillian tell you who the other parent is?" Kara asks.

"Y-yes." She pauses and looks up at Kara.

"You're my other mother, Kara." Kara looks shocked and I'm sure I look shocked too. Lillian stole Kara's DNA too? And made a child without her knowing? It's different with me because I wouldn't expect anything less from my mother, but to do it to Kara...she's despicable.

"Lillian somehow got your DNA and combined it with Lena's. She wanted to use me to destroy alien life on Earth. She wanted a loyal Luthor who wouldn't be defeated like Lex was and she wanted me to have the strongest powers that are from Krypton. Except when the serums wouldn't work, she kept trying. My powers are dormant. I haven't felt anything inside of me. I don't have superhearing, super speed, heat vision or superstrength. Oh, or freeze breath." Lennox continues.

"Kara, I understand why you're upset. I don't want you to think you have to be responsible for me or-." Lennox is cut off by Kara hugging her tightly.

"Oh Lennox. This is the best news of my life! Yes, I agree with Lena that Lillian had no right using our DNA without our consent, but I got the best thing ever to come out of it. You. Lennox you have changed my life so much. I never thought I could love a person as much as I love you. And now that I know you're mine, my heart is overflowed with love. Lennox, I want to be your mother. I want to be there for you always. You're not a burden. Lena and I were talking the other day about how we thought of you as our daughter and now we have DNA to prove that! Not that it changes much. It just confirms we were meant to be together. As a family. You, my love, are greater than all my powers and Lena's brilliance. You are everything we could have ever hoped for in a child. You are the best parts of both of us, baby. We couldn't ask for anything more." Kara finishes.

Lennox and I are sobbing and sniffling while Kara is kissing and hugging both of us.

"I love you. Both of you. I'm so happy you're my moms....Can I call you that?" She asks.

We respond by hugging and kissing her, "YES!" We say at the same time.

All this crying made Lennox tired and she fell asleep on Kara. We reposition and set her in the middle of us.

"Hey, mama." Kara says to me smiling making me laugh.

"I can't believe this. Not only do I have a daughter, I have a daughter with the love of my life. I'm angry at Lillian for creating Lennox to destroy alien life. But I'm happy that she will never be able to use or hurt Lennox again." I say.

"I feel the same way. I love you, Lena Luthor."

"I love you, Kara Danvers." I reply, falling asleep shortly after.

—

Lennox POV

I wake up and feel Kara's arms around me. This has become one of my favorite feelings. I carefully remove her arms and try to get up when suddenly I feel her arms wrap around me again and start to lightly tickle me.

"Not so fast I'm not done cuddling my daughter." Kara says while I'm laughing. This woke Lena up and she's smiling at me. She takes me into her arms and she hugs me tightly while kissing my cheeks.

"Did you sleep okay, my love?" She asks brushing some hair out of my face.

"Yeah I did. I like waking up in my mom's arms." I say making them both smile.

"We love when our daughter wakes up in ours." She responds laughing and tickling my side.

Both women let me get up and they head to the kitchen to make breakfast.

I sit down to pee and I immediately feel pain. It hurts to open my legs slightly and it hurts to pee. I start crying but try to make it silent.

"Lennox, love, are you okay in there?" I hear mom ask. Super hearing. Man will I ever get used to that?

"U-uh yeah." I say back stuttering.

"Len, it's okay if you're not, you can tell me." She responds.

"It hurts to pee and open my legs." I say not being able to hold in my tears.

"Can I come in, honey?"

"Y-yeah."

Kara walks in with a sad look in her eyes. This isn't my first time going through this, but now that both of my moms know, it's a little embarrassing and I hate that it makes them cry.

Kara helps me get off the toilet and pull my shorts up. She lifts me up easily so I can wash my hands and then takes me to the couch. Lena comes over, also with a sad look, and hands me a banana.

"Here, baby can you eat this so you can take all your meds while I finish up your oatmeal?" She asks and I nod and smile. I swallow all my pills with some water.

We all eat our breakfast on the couch while watching Kung Fu Panda. Some of the scenes make me chuckle and it seems to make moms smile too.

"Thanks for breakfast, Le-mama. Sorry I couldn't finish it all." I say sadly but she's stuck with a smile on her face. Oh, I called her mama.

"It's okay, love. I'm glad you liked it!" She says kissing my head and taking my bowl.

"Hey, Lennox? Alex just texted asking if her and Kelly could stop by to visit? Would that be okay?" Mom asks me.

"Yeah that would be okay. I want to see them." I say smiling.

A couple hours later, I wake up from a nap and walk out to the living room and see Alex and Kelly. I smile and walk over to Kelly and give her a hug. I then look at Alex who is smiling with some tears pooling in her eyes. I hug her tight and she holds me for a while. Everyone in this family knows how to give such good hugs.

"How are you feeling, Len?" Kelly asks as we sit down.

"I feel okay. I'm really sore pretty much everywhere. The meds the DEO gave me work really well though." I reply and Alex takes my hand in hers.

"Yeah the DEO has the good stuff." She says making us all laugh.

"Are you hungry, Lennox? We brought some Noonan's sandwiches for everyone if you want one?" Kelly asks.

"Oh yes I would love one, thank you for bringing some!" I say.

We all eat and continue to chat. I zone out for a while not wanting to participate in conversation. I'm just so tired. The sandwich I ate filled me up and so I'm even more tired.

"Sweetheart, why don't you go lie down for a bit, okay? I'll come wake you in an hour or so." Mama says and I nod.

"Thanks for coming to see me. I love you guys." I say hugging Kelly then Alex.

"We love you, too. Sleep well and feel better, okay? We want you well for the next game night we have." Alex says and I nod and smile.

Mom helps me into my bed and tucks me in. I fall asleep easily.

Kara POV

"Did she go down alright?" Lena asks and I nod and smile.

"So how is she really?" Alex asks me.

"She uh-she was trying to go to the bathroom this morning and I heard her crying when I was helping Lena in the kitchen. She was having pain opening her legs to pee." I say trying to hold in my tears, but they spill when I see Alex and Kelly start to cry.

"I can't believe he did that to her. She's so little. So innocent." Alex says with anger lining her voice.

"I can't believe it either. She still hasn't said anything about it to us yet. Which is okay, but it's like waiting for a dam to break. We will be here for when she does but it breaks my heart watching her trying to keep it together." Lena says wiping her tears.

"Do you have any leads on Lillian?" I ask after a beat of silence.

"Nothing promising. Brainy and J'onn were working on finding her but decided to regroup and come up with a different method to find her." Alex says.

"Where is Joe now?" Lena asks her.

"Still locked up at the DEO. I called Oliver Queen and asked if he could transfer him to Lian Yu." Mine and Lena's eyes go wide.

"Well, good. He deserves the worst the world has to offer." I say.

After another 45 minutes of chatting, we say bye to Alex and Kelly.

"I'll go wake her." I say to Lena and she nods and goes into the kitchen.

I walk in and see Lennox's brows furrowed. Her heart rate is spiked. Nightmare. I gently call her name and touch her arm.

She jolts awake trying to breathe. Her forehead is covered in sweat. God, I hope she can just get some good sleep soon. Her eyes have dark, dark circles underneath them.

"Hey, baby I'm right here. You're okay it was just a dream." I say and she clings onto me. She balls some of my shirt in her fist and starts crying. My poor baby. I rub her bony back gently and whisper into her ear that everything's okay. I put her into my lap and continue to shush her cries which are dying down.

"Where's mama?" She asks softly, pitch in her voice higher. It makes my heart melt.

"She's in the kitchen, do you want to go see her?" I ask and feel her nod.

I carry her out to the kitchen and Lena looks at me concerned.

"She's asking for you. Nightmare." I mouth to her and she nods.

I transfer Lennox from my arms to Lena's. Lennox sighs at Lena's touch and then cries a bit more. Lena continues to hold and rock our daughter while I finish making the food. Lennox doesn't say anything to Lena, she just cries.

Lena sits both of them on the couch and continues to comfort her. I see Lena rubbing Lennox's back under her shirt providing some skin to skin. I've noticed that Lennox likes that. I figure it's soothing and a reminder that we're real and here. After all she's been through, I'm glad we can provide some sort of comfort for our daughter.

I call Eliza asking if she would like to come over for dinner and see Lennox, which she agrees to.

I pad my way to the couch and see Lennox's red eyes that have finally stopped crying. I give Lena a break for a second and hold Lennox. 

"Hey baby. I just called grandma and asked if she would come for dinner, which she is. Is that okay?" I feel her nod and smile a bit.

"Lennox, do you have to use the bathroom?" Lena asks.

"Y-yeah. Could you help me?" She asks weakly.

"Of course, my love. Come on." Lena says and picks her up from my lap.

Eliza arrives an hour later with a cake of some kind. She sets it down and greets Lena and I before sitting next to Lennox on the couch who's watching tv. Lennox doesn't hesitate to wrap her arms around her neck and take comfort in Eliza.

We gather around the table and I put small servings on Lennox's plate along with her meds. She eats a little bit of potatoes before swallowing her pills.

Lennox doesn't say anything during dinner. Her nightmare must've really scared her. Lena, Eliza and I carry on a conversation while Lennox tries to eat as much as she can. Eliza couldn't be happier to know that Lennox is ours. Even if Lillian did it in the way she did.

After we finish up, I put on the Wizard of Oz which makes Lennox smile. She falls asleep on Eliza 30 minutes into it and I carry her to Lena's bed, and I guess mine now too, followed by Lena.

"I hope she can get some good sleep. She needs it. I hate that she's having such awful nightmares. I hate that there's nothing we can do to protect her when her own mind is attacking her." Lena says kissing our daughter.

"Me too. I might've snuck in a sleeping aid in her medication. Alex recommended it." I say and Lena smiles.

"I love her so much, Kar. I would seriously die for her." She says leaning on my shoulder and I wrap my arm around her waist.

"I love her so much, too Lee. I just want her to be okay and have normal kid experiences." I say voice cracking a bit.

"We will make sure she will." Lena says as we walk out the door.

We say goodbye to Eliza and head to bed. Lena wraps her arm around Lennox's waist while I take her into my arms in front.

"Goodnight, my love." I say to Lena kissing her.

"Goodnight, babe. I love you."

"I love you too." I say and we fall asleep easily after such an emotional day.