#if we ever make a timely joke that's how you know we've been replaced by an evil clone

[magicalgirlmindcrank]

Oh, you're home early Master! I was just finishing the dishes.

[space-cowgirllll]

Crush

a/n: soft jackson ellie ily.

not proofread, if you see any mistakes look away lol.

She couldn't stop staring. Sitting on a cold bench in front of Jackson's little schoolhouse, she hides behind the astronomy book she'd recently found while out on patrol. Frozen fingers flip to the next page every couple of seconds, far too fast to actually retain any information. She watches you lead Joel to a particular part of the fence that has clearly seen better days. The wood is rotting and splitting apart in certain spots. No longer safe for the children who play nearby. You nudge the post with the toe of your boot, eyes widening when it topples over. 

Her eyes follow the curve of your neck as you throw your head back, laughing at something Tommy said. Your smile lights up your entire face, sending a flutter of giddiness through her body, almost as if it had been directed at her. She bites her lip, averting her eyes when you crouch down to inspect the damage. Where you found jeans that fit you like that in times like these she'd like to know. One more quick glance and she contemplates walking away, leaving Joel to get dinner by himself.

"What are we looking at?" A familiar voice whispers behind her, causing her to almost drop her book. She clutches it to her chest.

"Nothing!" She whips her head around to find Jesse and Dina behind her. The pair plop down on either side of her watching while the two men try to make the broken piece work until Joel can come back and replace it later. You stand off to the side chatting, not wanting to get in their way. Ellie marvels at how pretty you look under the street lights. Your hair a messy halo of waves, making you look angelic. 

"So," Jesse knocks his knee against hers "Are you ever gonna actually talk to her?"

"I talk to her!" Ellie scowls. "She comes over to Joel's for dinner once a week."

"Oh, we know." He interrupts "We've been invited."

"It was brutal."  Dina winces. 

The couple quietly tease Ellie, reminiscing over that night a few months ago. She had begged them to come and serve as a buffer between you and her. They spent the whole night watching Ellie try and fail to not make a complete fool of herself. Stumbling over her words and cracking lame jokes that left her screaming into her pillow later that night in embarrassment. Jesse's foot kicking her under the table when she stared for too long. Ellie listens with a pout on her face. 

"You guys are the worst." She groans. Her eyes travel back to where you stand, widening a little when she sees you already staring. There's a tiny smile playing on the edge of your lips. Heat rises to her cheeks when you send her a little wave. Sorry, you mouth, gesturing to Joel and Tommy.

Dina's giggle seems to catch your attention. You shift from Ellie's flushed face to the brunette beside her. The two of you share a look, seemingly having a conversation with just your eyes. There's a sly smirk on your face when you finally look away. Her brows furrow in confusion. In that moment, Ellie wishes she spoke girl better. 

"You know what? Surprisingly, I think she might like you too." Her best friend pats her thigh as she stands. "Do something about it before she finds someone else who will actually make a move." 

She grabs a confused Jesse by the hand, leading him in the direction of her house. The two whispering as they go. 

Ellie digs the heel of her sneaker into the ground, the thin layer of snow crunching underneath her foot. Most of the people in her life knew about her little crush. The way she offers to take your patrol shifts if it was too cold. Always on the lookout for things that would brighten up your small classroom. Volunteering when you ask for help with random little tasks during town meetings. She isn't as subtle as she thought. There's no way you don't know she's spent the past year and a half pining after you and haven't said anything. 

Not only is she ridiculously awkward, Ellie speculates your disinterest also comes from the three year age gap between you two. At twenty four, you probably see her as a little girl with a crush. 

She can see how much you enjoy spending time with Joel, especially after your grandfather's passing. She would hate to ruin that for you. It's better for everyone if she keeps her mouth shut.

____

It isn't until a week later that Ellie sees you again. She's shirtless in the middle of her makeshift home in the garage just feet behind Joel's house. There's a small pile of discarded tops sitting at the foot of her bed. She huffs, trying to find one that nice enough, but doesn't make it look like she tried too hard.

You stopped by the stables in the morning, making plans with Joel for dinner and a game of poker. Ellie hid behind Shimmer, trying to think of a way to get out of tonight when a look from Joel told her she had no choice. She fumbles with the last couple of buttons on the flannel, too lost in thought to hear the sound of the door opening. 

"Ellie, food's read- oh!" 

"Shit!" She spins around to find you standing in the doorway, eyes fixed on her panicked face as she pops the last button open. Ellie shoves her arms into the sleeves of the maroon flannel she'd borrowed from Dina, knowing it probably matched the color of her flushed cheeks. At least she'd thought to put on a bra.

"In my defense, I knocked twice." You state as you slowly make your way around the room, pausing to inspect the posters hung on her walls. She watches you pick up the comic she'd thrown on the coffee table earlier. Your eyes light up in recognition. "Oh hey! My grandpa used to read these to me. I think I have some you're missing if you ever wanna see them." 

Her breath catches in her throat at the prospect of spending more time with you. "Really?" She grins. "I'd like that."

You nod, walking slowly towards her. Your footsteps loud in the quiet room. Ellie watches the way your piercing gaze roams her face, slipping to her exposed torso for just a second before locking eyes with her. She hopes you didn't hear the embarrassing way her breath hitches when you replace her clumsy fingers with yours. Ellie basks in the warmth radiating from your body as you button up her shirt, your warm breath hitting her temple. 

"Cute." You smirk looking down at her. "Really makes your eyes pop." Tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, you step back towards the door. "Don't make us wait too long."

Ellie stands frozen, heart pounding in her chest, listening to your retreating footsteps wondering what the hell just happened.  ——

After another slightly awkward dinner, she was shocked when you showed up at her doorstep again that night, this time waiting until she opened the door. Giving her a shy smile, you'd held out a box full of old comics, letting her know there was no rush on returning them. Ellie still remembers the grin that bloomed on your face when she'd invited you in. 

The two of you rarely left each other's side after that. Your friendship blossoming in the months that followed. It helped that you liked to talk and Ellie liked to listen to you talk. Most nights were spent together, either at your place or hers. She loved it when you read to her while she drew in her sketchbook. Some nights she would attempt to teach you how to play some of her favorite video games, enjoying how cute you looked when you were pouting after losing to her. The two of you had even started growing a dvd collection, always fighting over what movie to watch (she let you win almost every time.) 

She couldn't believe how quickly you'd become such a big part of her life. Ellie still had the urge to pinch herself on the mornings when she'd wake up to you sleeping soundly next to her. And on the nights where she'd stay awake, late into the early hours of the morning, memorizing every inch of your face, the magnitude of her feelings for you scared her. She'd do anything for you. 

Which is how she finds herself standing in the corner of the room nursing a drink, doing what she does best - watching you. You've been looking forward to the winter dance for weeks, begging Ellie to come with. The sweet look on your face when she walked through the door sent a rush of excitement through her.

You stay by her side all night until one of your friends pulls  you to the makeshift dance floor, managing to get Ellie out for one song before she quickly retreats back to where she was despite your protests. You're glowing under the twinkling lights, dancing and singing your way around the room. The navy blue sweater she'd gifted you for Christmas last month fits you like a glove.

"So where's your girl?" She looks up to find Jesse standing there, his face covered in a thin sheen of sweat from dancing. Dina's laugh sounds off from somewhere behind him.

Ellie chokes on her drink "She's not my girl." She says through a nervous chuckle. 

"You mean to tell me you follow her around like a lost puppy and you'll sleep in her bed but you won't tell her how you feel?" 

She shifts nervously from one foot to the other. "We're just friends. I sleep over at Dina's all the time."

"You don't look at Dina the way you look at her." He sighs looking out at the crowd of dancing people. "All I'm saying is it's only gonna get worse the longer you ignore it. Are you prepared to be her friend while she dates someone else?"

Ellie's eyes follow to where he's currently staring. Bile rises in her throat as she watches you dance with someone else. Twirling around with another woman, her hands where Ellie's had been just minutes before. Her hand grows clammy around the glass. The blonde kisses you. Her lips far too close to your mouth for it to be friendly. Before she knows it, she's pushing past her friend and rushing out the door. 

The chilly January wind bites at her face as soon as she steps outside. Blood rushes in her ears as she quickly walks back towards her house. She's mad. Mad at Jesse for being right. You for leaving her standing there alone. But mostly she's mad at herself. What had she been thinking? That she would just get to know you more and not fall even further? Her cold palms press into her eyes, trying to alleviate the stinging sensation. This crush was going to ruin her. 

She stops just feet from her door, digging into her pocket for her key. Footsteps that are not her own pound on the snowy pavement behind her. "Ellie!" 

Her eyes squeeze shut, regretting not walking faster. She wants nothing more than to freak out while buried underneath her covers. For the first time ever she doesn't want to see you. 

Your hand grips her bicep, spinning her around to face you. "Els what's wrong?" 

"Nothing 'm jus tired." She mumbles shrugging you off and taking a step back. Your lips pull down into a frown at her actions. 

"Why didn't you tell me? We could have come back together."

She scoffs. "You seemed a little busy. Didn't wanna bother you." 

"Ellie-"

"Caroline's great." She interrupts. "Word around town is she has quite the crush on you. If you wanna go back don't let me stop you."

"Oh my god shut up." In the blink of an eye she find herself up against the wall, your body caging her in. Your hands fly to the back of her head, fingers tangling in the short strands of her newly cut hair. You tug gently, forcing her to look up at you.

"She kissed you." Ellie whispers looking like a kicked puppy. 

"And if you had stayed long enough you would have seen me brush her off." You cup her face, slowly dragging your thumbs across her cheeks in a soothing manner. The tenderness in your eyes will forever be ingrained in her mind. "There's only one person I want to spend my night with and she's right here."

"Really?" You nod, brushing the tips of your noses together.

"I don't want to be just your friend Ellie," You whisper against her lips, your breaths mingling together. Her ears ring at your confession, and she hopes you can't hear the way her heart is pounding. "and I know you don't either. I've been waiting for you to make the first move, but I'm real tired of being patient baby." 

Your lips press against hers in a soft kiss. It's hesitant at first, giving her the option to pull away. You see her eyes flutter shut, shaky hands wrapping around your neck. She whines quietly, wanting more. Her fingers slip down and hook onto your belt loops, pulling you in and deepening the kiss. Your tongue is soft and warm in her mouth, sliding against hers as you press her further into the wall. She shivers when your cold hands caress the warm skin of her lower back. 

Ellie's head goes fuzzy at the feeling of your thigh slotting in between her legs. Her hips seem to have a mind of their own as she slowly rocks back and forth on it, the seam of her jeans giving just enough friction to provide some relief. 

Her soft mewls and the wet sounds of your mouths fill the air. Somewhere in the back of her mind she realizes you two are still outside, where anyone walking by can see. You need to go inside. She just can't find it in her to care at the moment. 

Hands slide from their place on your hips to cup your ass, squeezing harshly, drawing a groan from you. "Hmm. Do you wanna know how many times I've caught you staring at it?" You ask as your mouth pulls back to kiss down the column of her throat. Teeth nipping the soft skin there. Ellie laughs breathlessly in response, somewhat lightheaded from the lack of oxygen. The dazed look in her eyes sends a jolt of heat through you. 

"Ellie?"

The two of you rip apart at the sound of Joel's voice. He stands just outside of his back door, the concerned look on his face vanishes when he spots you and Ellie off to the side of the garage. 

"You two alright out there?" 

You want to laugh at the clear discomfort and amusement in his voice. "Fine Joel, just walking her home."

"Uh huh." He doesn't sound convinced. "Well, best get inside before the snow picks up."

"Right. Good night!" 

Ellie rushes to unlock the door, pulling you in and slamming the door shut. 

"How did you know?" She asks, playing nervously with her fingers. Her freckled face deliciously flushed. A love bite peeking through the collar of her hoodie. 

"You weren't good at hiding it. I had my suspicions." you giggle, intertwining your fingers with hers. "Dina also might have put in a good word. Said I would love you if I just got to know you better."

"And?"

"She was right."

[slutforpringles]

Yeah, it was a strange one the way it played out. To be honest, the more I've spoken to some of the parties involved and the more has kind of emerged, the less clear it's got actually how it's been handled, which I'd like to say is unusual in Formula One. Maybe it's not because people don't always act in F1 with their true intentions upfront. But I think the way you described it as [Daniel] processing it in real time and learning it at the same time as us, I think it's pretty much how it happened. The key thing was that Ricciardo was aware that something was going on. He's not immune to speculation. He tries not to engage with it too much, but obviously either he or the people around him are feeding him the main things. He knew that there was a deadline approaching for a decision, which primarily he thought was all about 2025. The main thing that changed was going into the Singapore weekend, the speculation had intensified that it could be about right now, a change right now. But when they went into the Singapore weekend, I know there's been a few reports and claims and counter claims around this, Helmut Marko, for example, has said that Riccardo did know because Lawson had known for two weeks already. But I don't think that's true. Bear in mind, Marko has been saying at various points this year that it could be Ricciardo's last race … I was on the phone to someone close to Riccardo last week and he joked that 'we've been sacked since April, so this hasn't really come out of the blue', that's what they've been dealing with. But I think what happened was that Ricciardo took control of the narrative over the course of the Singapore weekend. As far as I can understand, the best I can make out, nobody told Riccardo explicitly, this is your last race, we will be replacing you after this. He knew that there was a very, very good chance, probably 99% chance he was losing his drive for Lawson for the following year. And then there started to be more and more noise about it being a change for now. But he had been told during the summer break that he was good for the rest of the season, basically. So I think he was reacting to the speculation. Nobody gave him an absolutely explicit, this is 100% done and we are going to confirm that Lawson's in and you're out. So Riccardo went into the Singapore weekend saying everything he said on the Thursday, which was, you know, I wouldn't bet my house on being here at the end of the year, but that's what I expect. As far as he was aware, it was all about 25, nothing else, blah, blah, blah. But then through the weekend, you saw that change. You know, he was kind of as you said, processing it, the speculation was more intense than ever. Some of the broadcast, like the Sky Sports F1 stuff was very much laying it on thick that they understood this was his last race, etc etc. And I think Riccardo just rolled with that and just went right, Red Bull aren't going to do anything here, they're not actually going to make this official. I need to act like this is my last race weekend because I think this is going to be my last race weekend. And if I don't do it, no one's going to do it for me, which is a really sad way for it to have played out, but it just speaks to how confusing this whole mess has been.

Scott Mitchell Malm discussing how Daniel's Singapore exit was handled by Red Bull and the subsequent false media narratives that have since emerged from various players involved.

via: The Ringer F1 Show

[adventuringblind]

Unrequited Understanding

Norlestappen x Reader

Genre: Angst, hurt/comfort

Summary: Her father comes back into her life as a replacement race engineer. Now she can't escape him and his voice when she does the one thing she thought he couldn't touch.

Warnings: eating disorder, abuse, past child abuse, sef harm, suicide attempt

Notes: for @ashiekins, I hope you like it! I'M SORRY FOR THE ENDING I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF!

Masterlist // Request Form // My Website // buy me a Ko-Fi

January

The new year had never felt so sweet. Her victory with Max and Redbull had been a dream. Max taking another championship, had the entire team walking on cloud nine.

She spent new years with her boys. It's tradition at this point to messily kiss all together as the new year comes around.

They'd done so much for her. She's come so far in her journey.

"What are you thinking about, Love?" Neither her nor Lando could sleep. Most nights, they end up talking to get the heavy thoughts to lessen a bit. It's why they get one half of the bed to themselves.

"How nice it feels to know I'm still here and loved." She rests her head on Lando's chest, the steady rythme of his heart lulling her into a restful state.

"Life wouldn't be the same without you." He kisses the top of her head as her mind finally gives into sleep.

February

Her and Max sit together at the large conference table. The factory is preparing for the new season. Energy is running high, and she can feel it crackling in the atmosphere.

Christian talks about how excited he is for the new season. 2023 is going to be theirs to dominate. Adrian has been working tirelessly to give them a title worthy car.

"We have had to make some last-minute changes to the team, unfortunately." Christian makes eye contact with her, and the good feeling she had dissolves. "Your race engineer has fallen terminally ill and is being hospitalized. The good news is we've found a last-minute replacement."

The door opens, and she feels the air leave her lungs. Her body shakes in fear of the man who takes confident strides to his chair.

Christian introduces them, clearly not understanding that they know each other very well. The man is her father, after all.

She has her mother's last name. Intent on separating herself from him entirely. He'd been doing Indie car for years. She never thought he'd make the switch after how they left things.

Max shoots her a concerned look, but she shakes it off. None of the boys had ever seen what her father looks like. They don't know she changed her last name.

She has no intention of ruining a good season because of her petty emotions. So, she says nothing.

March

It's not as bad as she thought it would be. They don't interact much aside from talking about data and while she's in the car.

The underhanded comments make her thoughts reel. The constant questioning of her skill while she's driving makes her think she's crazy. Her father is too good at making it look like a joke. People laugh with him, not understanding he means what he says.

He talks over her, cuts her off, bosses her around like she's still a child. She shrinks in on herself every time he cones around.

Stay silent and listen. That's what got her through her childhood. Just don't make him angry.

He lashes out when he's angry.

Charles is there when a nightmare causes her to be sick. A memory of her childhood that haunts her still.

The Monegasque holds her hair up and rubs her back as she sobs. He makes her a warm drink and holds her, letting her wet tears soak into his shirt.

"Do you want to talk about it, mon chéri?" He whispers gently against her forehead.

She inhales, breath catching in her throat as she does. "My dad, he - well - he used to say I'd never be anything. I sometimes dream about the memory."

"Your father and Jos can fuck off." Charles cups her face with his hands. "You are amazing. Whatever he told you is a lie. You've proven yourself to the world. Your younger self can rest knowing she got you here, that you are safe and loved and enough."

April

It's getting worse by the day. She's not sure where her father got the idea that he could order her around like she's still five and karting. It's getting annoying and ridiculous.

He's taken to snatching any food out of her hand and tossing it away into the nearest bin. What a waste. He could've eaten it himself.

He keeps telling her the car is too heavy. The data doesn't show that, but whatever. Her food being taken from her like when she was young was not how she expected the season to go. She takes to not eating because it's easier than fighting with him.

Her physio keeps asking her about why her weight seems to be plummeting recently. Even trying to get it back on her with altered meal plans. The concerns get brought up later in a meeting with Christian. The severity of her condition being made apparent.

Max watches her sob over a salad. She can tell he wants to push, asked what is causing the relapse. Understand where her head is at.

He hands her a water bottle and waits until she drinks the entire thing. "It's okay to struggle, but please don't shut us out. You don't have to do this alone, alright?"

She doesn't respond, simply collapses into his patient arms.

May

Lando and Charles happened to be passing by at the worst time. The Redbull garage still buzzing with the excitement of Max's podium and her mediocre result compared.

They saw her race engineer laying into her about every mistake. No other staff around to hear the conversation. Her head hung in shame as he pointed out every flaw.

Charles interrupts with such ease. He says her PR officer was looking for her earlier. It gets her to excuse herself from the conversation, leaving the two boys with her engineer.

"Mind your own business next time," scoffs the older man. He leaves the younger two confused.

Charles takes in Lando's mildly anxious body movements. "Something isn't right, Charles. She had that same look from when we were rookies."

Charles hums in agreement. "We'll have to wait for her to come to us for now."

June

The underhanded comments are getting progressively worse. People have started noticing that something is off about her race engineer and his behavior towards her.

Meetings are difficult and the team is walking on eggshells. Max looks ready to explode and has been ripping her father to pieces after every comment. He gets in trouble, so she asks him to stop.

She doesn't mind. Her whole life has been taking this kind of behavior from him. Max knows better than anyone that it's best to respect that kind of ask.

"I'm here if things ever get to a point where you want it to stop. I will always be here for you."

July

Her wight combined with her self-harming habits are making it harder to drive. Somewhere in her head she knows she can't continue like this. The car no longer works with her.

Christian keeps pulling her into his office and asking her about where she's at. Warning her the if she continues down this road, she won't be able to drive. That he'll be forced to find a replacement.

She cries as the boys hold her. She tells them she's not sure if she can do it anymore, that she's not cut out for this sport. They comfort and reassure her that's a lie.

Her thoughts remain stuck on being a burden to them. She gets better just to fall once more into her old habits. They have careers and goals that would be easier to achieve without her around.

Maybe her father is right about her after all.

August

The summer break brings them a much-needed reprieve from the fast-paced world they live in. She gets to spend time away from the incessant voice of the man she hates. Her boys occupying her mind instead.

There is a finality about this that she can't explain. Like things can only get better from here on out. That something in her future is going to bring her the one thing she's looking for.

Swimming in the ocean and eating what they want. They laugh and joke like nothing has changed. It's the first time in months that she feels normal.

This is how things should be. The smile on her face is genuine and the boys can all tell.

September

The cuts line her skin in an unorganized fashion. Angry, red, and bleeding. Her race had been ended early due to a collision. She'd been collateral damage; it wasn't her fault.

The media didn't see it that way. Her father definitely had no mercy when he mercilessly explained how she will never be good enough as a driver.

Hidden away in her drivers' room now, watching the blood pour from her skin. The boys know, they've seen the fresh lines. They are trying to find a way to get her to stop, but these feeling are fighting back harder than ever before. She's not sure how to fight them anymore.

Disappearing seems like the best option. The only way she'll be able to escape the dark thoughts swirling in her head. The one place her father won't be able to touch her anymore will be in her death.

She moans as the blade digs deeper. The ecstasy that accompanies addiction is a feeling she will always crave. Sick satisfaction bubbles in her throat and pour out on her eyes as red stains the floor.

This wasn't her plan, but it's okay. The pain makes all her thoughts go away. Lessens the weight on her chest. Forces her mind to focus on something else.

Everything is spinning and then it goes dark.

Warm hands and comforting words. That's all she's ever wanted.

October

The boys can see how sick she is. Max won't let her be alone in the garage. Not after she almost died.

Her physio is with her when none of the boys are. They keep asking her questions that she won't give answers to.

It's not until an altercation with her father is finally caught. He's condemning her over the radio while she's driving. They'd had an argument earlier about how she should be taking turn three.

The public execution is miserable. Still, she puts her head down and drives.

The second-place trophy has never felt heavier. It drags her arms downwards as she heads to the garage with Max. He doesn't know about what happened yet and she hopes it stays that way. She screams as she puts it away in her room.

She avoids her father as much as possible on the way to the press conference. The glimpse she does get of him leaves a bitter taste in her mouth. Christian looks angry as he presses a finger into her father's chest.

She's zoned out majority of the conference. Until A journalist with a soft voice is asking about her feelings towards her race engineer.

"It's just how things are sometimes. I wasn't listening to instructions, and he was frustrated. It happens." She shrugs it off like this is the most normal everyday occurrence. Which, in her defense, it kind of is.

Every media outlet seems to want to know more about it. Her emotions are struggling to remain contained. the inevitable sobs escape after a particularly worded question about whether his actions could be considered abuse or not.

She breaks, collapsing in the middle of the media pen. Her boys are there blocking the view of the cameras as her body fails to move.

They know now what has been happening. Her secret is out there for everyone to see.

November

Her father is fired from the team with immediate effect. Christian apologizes relentlessly for not knowing and not seeing it sooner.

The media is asked to refrain from asking about the incident and anything regarding her past race engineer. They respect it, probably wanting to avoid another meltdown in the middle of an interview.

Max, Lando and Charles are with her through every step of the way. They encourage her to talk to them and she does. It feels nice not having to hold in her family secrets.

They want to help her, and she wants to be helped.

Her race engineer for the end of the season ends up taking the job for next year. He's kind and keeps his voice calm. Her last few drives amaze everyone.

The top step of the podium has never felt so good. She didn't need to prove herself to anyone, but the confidence it brings her is hard to deny.

Closure feels even better.

December

Her therapist is proud of her for opening up to the boys more. They don't push her to spill everything, but they encourage her when she does.

The end of the year pulls them closer together. After everything that happened, she wasn't sure she was going to see 2024 come around. She's glad she does though.

She fought to the end. She made it to her peace. A place where her father can't touch.

Warm hands and gentle words for all of eternity.

January... Again

Three boys stand in front of a grave. Her favorite flowers in hand. The silence stretches between them. None of them know how to proceed.

The memory of finding her on the floor replays in Max's head. He should've known to find her right after the race. That cold September afternoon in Zandvoort. The day she bled out for one final time.

Charles and Lando assure Max it's not his fault. IT hadn't been her plan. There was no note, not even a warning sign aside from her mental health declining.

Her father, who they now know was the catalyst for her relapse, is in jail. Christian made sure to get him put away so the boys wouldn't have to worry about it.

The other drivers came to the funeral. The journalists respect their wishes not to speak on the matter. They need to heal before they can even think about trying to explain how all three of them had taken time off.

The FIA pushed the races back since Redbull needed to sort things out. The memorial on the track has been visited by everyone on the team.

They tried so hard. They wanted her to stay. They can only hope that she found what she needed in whatever lies beyond this life.

[nightmare-niko]

A little bit of Jealousy [Kim Hongjoong x reader]

A/n: should I make a smut pt 2 of this??

Warnings: jealous reader, not proofread <3

Copying or translating my writing is not allowed. If you see my work on another site it is stolen. Reblogs are appreciated and encouraged.

Dating someone as famous as Kim Hongjoong had its obstacles. Nothing that the two of you couldn't handle, of course. But one thing you were never prepared for was following him on tour. You’ve been dating Hongjoong for almost five years, you had become amazing friends with all of the members in that time. Even though you had been together for so long, you'd never had thought about following him around the world on tour.

But here you were; mask and hat on hiding your identity, pretending to be staff (Don’t question it???) You made sure to keep your distance from Hongjoong, staying a few paces away from the commotion.

You kept a careful eye on your beautiful boyfriend. He's been on work-mode all day, you couldn't wait to have boyfriend-mode Hongjoong back. You watched as he signed things and took selfies. You loved watching his fan interactions, but seeing them in real life felt different. You had no problem watching tons of fans call your man handsome online, but in real life...

Jealousy slowly seeped into every fiber of your being. You knew it was ridiculous to be feeling this way but you honestly couldn’t help it. You decided to just bite your tongue and try to keep cool.

•

The two of you finally were alone in the blacked out van. Sitting basically on top of him, your nerves finally began to settle.

"Are you hungry?" You look over at Hongjoong.

He hums gently, "a little." He looks up to his manager that driving the car to the hotel. “When our manager goes to sleep wanna sneak out and get some food?” He whispers in your ear. His warm breath making your skin break out in goosebumps.

"Okay but i we get caught, im blaming you.”

Hongjoong laughs gently and tightens his grip on you.

•

The two of you slip into a private booth at a restaraunt nearly your hotel.

"Oh my god! Is this a date?" You joke, leaning into him.

"Of course, why wouldn't it be! " He reaches across the table to hold your hand.

"We haven't beenon a date like this in so long!" You cheer, tightening your grip on Hang joongs hand.

“I know, this is nice... I’ve missed you.” His voice a sincere tone.

Oh how this night was perfect...

That was until your waitress scampered up to your table. The sentual sway of her hips and the swing of her ponytail was enough to have you on edge. You had to watch other people flirt with your man all day, and now you have a waitress to worry about.

The girl batted her eyelashes seductively as she introduced herself to only your boyfriend. Unluckily for you, your lovely Hongjoong was ever the gentleman. That meant he already knew your order. You knew that he wasn't flirting with her. He just happened to be oozing with charm and charisma. The waitress was eating it up regardless and by the time she walked away steam was blowing out of your ears.

“What's wrong my love?"

You clench your jaw, "nothing, why?"

"Cmon, baby, don't be like that."

You sigh, "she was flirting with you." you mumble, rage quickly being replaced by embarrassment.

You watch Hongjoongs face turn from worry to something more mischievous, “you’re jealous?”

“What! Ugh! No-” You defend, "I'm just pointing it out, that's all...”

Your boyfriend doesn’t believe your half assed lies. Not does he have time to calm your worries, because the waitress was back with your drinks, great. You and Hongjoong usualy ordered cokes with your food, simple. But unlike your soda Hongjoong’s drink had a tiny decoration on top of it. You scoff, staring daggers at the bold waitress. You continue to star as she walks away.

"Are you kidding mie right now??” You shift your gure to meet Hongjoong’s”

He just shrugs, "maybe she's just a fan!”

"Just a fan my ass. She hasn't even looked in my direction the whole time we've been here!" You complain to your boyfriend. "She's totally into you. WOW that little-"

“Baby! Please,” he stops your outburst. “I’m here for you. Only you, no random waitress is going to change that’s.”

There’s not a single part of you that thought Hongjoong was unfaithful. But you still didn’t like watching randoms flirt with what was yours. You sigh, deciding not to let something so small ruin your night with your boyfriend.

By the time the two of you got back into your hotel room there was only one thing un your minds.

Bed time.

"What time do we have to wake up tomorrow, Joong? " You ask, taking out your pjs from your suitcase.

"Not until later," he pauses, "Why?"

You shrug," I was just gonna hop in the shower real quick." Hongjoong quirks up, "wanna join me?”

Tag list (If you want to be added just comment!)

@nallasstuff

@chmpgneprblem

@qoopeeya

@lilybellalana

@sleepysongbirdsings

[the-perfect-wagnerite-again]

Wait you really have a boyfriend? What's he like?

Oh gosh, he's just amazing. We met here on tumblr, if you can believe it, and he's got all the wonderful qualities I lack.

He's incredibly smart, but in a practical kind of way. I'm useless when it comes to cars and computers and technology and just about anything concrete, but I can ask him about it and he just....has it. What car VINs mean, which planes are used for which jobs under which liners, NASA history, tech know-how, and on and on and on. Whether it's something basic I've just never investigated myself ("What exactly is a server and how does it work?") or some incredibly niche bit of trivia ("the bolts in the facade of this building were replaced in 1965 because this ordinance was passed for the county and...."), it's like the exact opposite of my fascination with philosophy. I guess that might seem like something innocuous, but to me, it's comforting to think that I could come at him with a question about almost any earthbound topic and he'll almost always have an answer for me.

He's also naturally charming and funny. When people say they like men with a sense of humor, they don't mean a guy who just cracks jokes all the time. He has this way of effortlessly making me laugh, so every minute I spend with him feels rejuvenating and carefree. In the years we've known each other, I've never, ever been bored talking to him. But it's not just that he amuses or entertains me, it's that he can somehow take all of my feelings and lift them up just a little bit higher. The way he carries his voice, the rhythm of his speech, all his little ticks and gestures, it's like they were specifically crafted to pull me in. I'm not even sure if he knows he has that effect on me, to be honest, it might come so naturally to him that he doesn't notice it. We've never once seriously argued, and even when we disagree, it feels less like an opposition of wills and more like a playful rivalry.

He's my favorite guy in the world, I love him ❤️

[those70scomics]

Fictober Day 13: "that's not the point"

That '70s Show Fanfiction

In Eric's office at Blinkhorn Toys, Kelso described integrating a dynamic programming language into a new line of educational toys for kids. His facility for computer code never cessed to be impressive -- or surprising for someone with Kelso's lack of common sense. But he'd always been good with numbers, and Eric was glad the VP of toy development agreed to hire Kelso as a consultant.

"And you can make cartridges to swap out for different learning games," Kelso said, sitting across Eric's desk. "It'll be the Sesame Street version of a Gameboy." He shoved his proposal aside and laved his fingers together on the desk. "Now let's talk about you knocking up Donna with a kid."

Eric choked on his coffee. His coughs were whispers compared to the cacophony in his brain. Kelson couldn't know Donna was pregnant. Neither of Eric's parents would've told him, and Donna sure as hell wouldn't.

Kelso stood, dashed to Eric's side of the desk, and patted his back hard. "Arms up."

"I'm fine," Eric coughed out, but Kelso insisted on hitting his back more. "Enough!" He swatted Kelso away, but Kelso stayed close. "What -- what do you mean, exactly?"

"Betsy's got cousins and friends, but Brooke wants her to have a sibling. I can barely handle one kid, and who knows if Jackie and Hyde'll ever become parents, so if you and Donna ... "

"Oh, thank God." Eric's throat was raw, but Kelso was just being Kelso. Eric directed him to return to the chair across the desk. "Betsy's a good kid. You're way more capable of fatherhood than you give yourself credit for."

Kelso was seated again and said, "That's not the point. I never want Betsy to feel like she's not important, the most important person to me along with her mom. Having another kid now would kill her sense of reality. She's already ten. My older brothers were basically out of the house by the time the twins were born. It's all sorts of messed up."

"Wow. You've become introspective in your old age." Eric was joking about the last part. Kelso had turned thirty this year. He was hardly elderly, but he did think a lot more deeply. "How would Donna and me having a baby help you?"

"Well, you could name me and Brooke your kid's godparents. Then we'd visit each other a lot more often, and Brooke would get to hold an infant in her arms again."

The muscles in Eric's back tensed. He and Donna had already chosen Hyde and Jackie's as godparents. They were doing a great job as Betsy's, and they were more than friends but family. "So Brooke's missing baby-time, and you want to give her some without actually having another one. That's really sweet of you, man."

"Actually, it's selfish." Kelso grabbed the blind proposal he'd written, and his thumb repeatedly rubbed the corner of it's cover. "I want Brooke to remember how much work having a baby is -- the no-sleeping, the puke, the poop -- and realize we made the right choice having only one."

"But all that stuff's temporary," Eric said. He'd been reading his dad's baby log about him, and the relief Dad experienced once Eric was potty trained had jumped off the page. "What about all the fun and joy you have raising Betsy?"

Kelso stopped fiddling with his proposal and scratched his jawline. "Yeah, she'll be a teenager soon and won't hang out with me and Brooke as much anymore. Then she'll go to college ... and Brooke and I had Betsy when we were barely in our twenties. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad having another kid, except ... "

"Except ... ?"

"The no-sleep, puke, and poop will take our attention away from Betsy. She might feel like we've replaced her."

Eric drank what remained of his coffee. What he said next could influence Kelso in either direction, and he didn't need that responsibility. So he took a moment to craft his words carefully. "Why don't you and Brooke ask Betsy how she'd feel about have sibling?"

The tortured expression on Kelso's face vanished. "Ask Betsy! Eric, you're a genius!" He patted the proposal and said, "Okay, you talk to your VP about this. I've got to get back to Chicago. ... Ask Betsy -- why didn't I think of that?"

"Don't forget that she's ten!" Eric shouted after him. Kelso was already at the office door. "She won't understand what becoming a big sister means unless it's fully explained to her."

"Brooke'll be good at that." Kelso was halfway out the door. "Thanks for everything, Eric!"

He disappeared into the hallway, but Eric wasn't sure if his advice was good or if he should've kept his mouth shut. Friday the thirteenth produced strange effects in people, and a sense of eerieness invaded his body.

He'd be making decisions for a helpless being soon enough -- he and Donna would be -- and mistakes were an inextricably part of parenthood. Of life. His errors might be fatal, and he finally and truly got why Donna was reading all those baby books.

He picked up the receiver of his office phone and dialed his mom. She only worked part time at Point Memorial Hospital these days and never on Fridays. When she picked up, he said, "Hello, Mom? ... No, everything's fine. ... My voice is not squeaky -- anyway, when's the earliest date we could schedule a one-on-one babycare lesson?"

[novalein]

(Cross posting from Wattpad) (Part 5/13)

Just like that, you looked at her once more before walking away. You need to get away now, or else all these feelings will eat you alive. Not here. Not outside. Not next to her. You can't afford to break down next to her.

"W-Wait! [Name]!" Kaede called out for you, but you didn't turn around. You just continued walking away, hoping she won't follow you. But knowing her, she won't leave it like that. She will finish this conversation.

She took her bag from the ground and immediately walked to your direction in a fast pace. "[Name]!" She called out once more as she was practically jogging now. She quickly caught up to you and grabbed you by your wrist, halting your movements. "Let go of me, Kaede." You said, trying your best to keep your voice steady.

"No." She firmly replied, her other hand turning your body to face her. "I won't let go of you until you tell me what's bothering you. I don't want us to part our ways like this."

You wiped your tears once more before you spoke up, your voice trembling like your hands. "Did you even miss me at all? Did yoy just move on and... left our memories behind?" You whispered. "I thought of you, day and night. I cried for weeks with no end. I'd think of the things we've done, then things we wanted to do."

Kaede's eyes stared right back to yours. "Of course I missed you. Nothing that I did in France could replace the thought that I wanted to do it with you. I wanted you by my side every time I did something." She said with a gentle smile.

Those words might have been the thing that did it for you. You broke up into sobs, mumbling about how much you missed her, how much you wish you could travel the world with her while you do what you like to do as well. "Please don't cry. You'll make me cry, too." She whispered as she teared up. Her hand caressed your cheek, wiping your tears with her thumb as you desperately leaned into her touch.

"I wish we had found a solution." You murmured in between sobs. "Believe me, me too. There is nothing I'd prefer to have than you by my side while I do what I like to do the most."

Your tears continued falling uncontrollably, but having her here, talking to her, somehow made it a lot more bearable than you had anticipated.

"Please don't cry. I don't like seeing your beautiful face covered in tears." She said, wiping more of your tears away. Although she couldn't stop her own from flowing either. Your own hands moved to wipe her tears away as well. "I can't help it. I missed you so damn much."

"I missed you, too. Just as much." She said, leaning into your touch as well. Before you knew it, she pulled you into another tight embrace. You hugged her back just as tightly once more.

Inhaling her scent once more, holding her body close once more, you couldn't help but let the tears stream down your face uncontrollably. It seemed it was the same for her because her body was shaking just as much as yours.

After a couple moments, she slowly pulled her head back, just enough so she could see your face. Her eyes practically screamed 'kiss me', but you didn't dare to move right now.

Well, you didn't need to because she leaned closer and kissed you, instead. The kiss was full with sadness and love at the same time. It lasted a couple seconds before she hesitantly pulled away completely.

Wiping her tears away, she quickly apologised. "Ah, I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me." She murmured but you just shook your head. "No... don't worry. That kiss was more than needed right now." You replied softly, wiping your own tears away.

"This was probably the saddest kiss we ever shared." She commented, you could only agree. "Yeah. It was. I'm sure we've had better days." You chuckled at your own terrible joke. She joined in. "Yeah, I think so, too. But... most importantly..." She murmured as she stepped closer. "Please don't hate me. I know I could have handled some things better... and I wasn't the most perfect girlfriend in the world... but I don't want to part ways in bad terms now. Maybe... one day we can make it work again. Maybe... your company will allow you to do some home office type of things... I don't know. I don't want to fully give up on this. On us."

"I can only hope. A big company definitely has a lot of things to offer." You pondered. "What's your next destination? How long are you staying in Japan?"

She thought about it for a moment. "Uhm... well, my next destination is Thailand. I leave on the twenty-second which means I have around three weeks until then." You nod at that.

That's a good thing. Maybe you two could-

No.

Don't get your hopes up because of silly words that were spoken during a vulnerable moment. But maybe you two could make it work?

"And... you mean it? That we could have a future? I don't want you to get my hopes up just for you to have a new girl or something." You said quietly. She shook her head. "My heart is reserved for you, love. Don't you worry." She said with a huge grin.

You rolled your eyes at her cheesiness, though a smile remained on your lips. "You're as cheesy as ever, ew." You teased her. She burst out laughing. "You bring it out in me. What can I say?" You gently nudged her. "You did it again. I feel like I'm in a romance movie." She simply snickered in response.

A moment of silence passed as you pondered what to do now. Maybe you could talk with your boss if that would be an okay thing to do. Your position wasn't all that low and the company was all for being digital. "I'll talk to my boss about possibilities." You tell her. "I'll hit you up once I got something new." She nods in acknowledgement. "Okay. I'll see you around, then?"

"Yeah. You definitely will."

And just like that, the two parted ways for now.

[some-pers0n]

Euthanasia

Fandom: TF2

Characters: Medic, Engineer

CW: Major character death

Summary: Ludwig didn't need to worry about death. It was so far away that he couldn't care about feeling the cold embrace of finality. Which was why Dell telling him that he was dying threw him so off guard.

Word Count: 1.6k

A/N: I'm sad now.

Right off the bat, this oneshot is inspired by one of @archiarthur's comics (this one) and it has rotted my mind entirely. I saw that they were okay with fanfic being made of their art (or that they'd be flattered about it) and I just...yeah. I'm very awkward and I'm sorry if I did something wrong I– uh... Here!! Old man yaoi!!

Death was a concept that Ludwig didn't care to think about. Despite being surrounded by death from his time as both a doctor and mercenary, the concept was too abstract for his liking. The idea that a being full of memories, thoughts, and general life could be wiped out in an instant was...uncanny to sum up in a single word. He grew used to the concept but never did that underlying sense of dread and existential horror truly disappear. 

He never gave too much credence to the thought of himself dying, at least permanently. He flirted with hell enough. If any of his organs were to start shutting down he'd merely replace them. He was a healthy enough man and had grafted enough souls in him to live more lifetimes than anybody needed to.

Ludwig didn't need to worry about death. It was so far away that he couldn't care about feeling the cold embrace of finality.

Which was why Dell telling him that he was dying threw him so off guard.

"You don't..." he lightly chuckled. "No, no. You're joking again, aren't you? Pulling my leg?"

Dell snickered. "Wish I was. But, I can feel it. Somethin's up. Don't know what. I just know my body's...breaking down. It's time."

"That can't be right. No, I– we did everything right. Got married, settled, been together for decades now... You can't go. Not after everything we've done."

"Life works that way, I guess. Everything's right and nice for a good couple of years before it all starts falling apart." Dell gave a lighthearted shrug.

"You're only in your eighties."

"Ain't that when most people start dying off though?" Dell cracked a smile. "It's sooner or later this was gonna happen."

Ludwig could only stare in disbelief. Part of him clung to the idea that this was some elaborate joke. Perhaps it was his mind slipping away and making him have vivid nightmares. Anything other than to face reality. To continue believing there would be another day he could spend with his love.

But, this was real. This old, aging man before him, his husband, was dying.

He couldn't help but look longingly at him. Only now did it settle in how much he's aged. He was seated in a wooden rocking chair, a patterned blanket covering his legs. He'd ditched the overalls a long while ago, now opting for cozy and warm cotton sweaters. His eyes were cloudy and he was wearing a pair of square glasses. His hair was little more than a couple of grey wisps. His beard was long and silvery. Despite it all, that look of kindness and passion remained within him.

Ludwig couldn't lose that. Not now, not never.

"I could fix whatever issue it is though!" he said. "It won't take too long. I haven't had a proper transplant in a while,  but I'm fairly certain that my skills–"

"That won't be necessary, doc," Dell replied. "I'm fine with dying."

Ludwig paused. "You're what?"

"I'm alright with dying. That's what I said, right?"

"But it's death. You'll be gone. I don't have access to all of my supplies and materials that are needed to revive a man-" He was cut off by Dell's wheezy laughter.

"Still don't get it?" he spoke through the snickers. "I'm good with passing. Forever. Finally being put to rest. No transplants. No resurrection. Just me going to the grave."

Ludwig furrowed his eyebrows. "No, no, no, that isn't right. You aren't supposed to go. Not now. Not ever. You're here, with me. You're always there."

"I mean, someday I'll hafta go, won't I?"

"But that's not– no!" Ludwig stood up. "You don't have to go. I– I can fix this. You aren't going to die. You won't. Don't you dare die on me. Ever." He crouched to Dell's level, resting his hands against his face. A myriad of emotions swirled within him. Denial, sadness, grief, false hope. He didn't even notice when tears began to stream down his face.

Dell sighed, his smile unwavering. "I know it's a lot. I'm sorry. But, it's what's gonna happen. You can try to swap out as many organs as you can. Replace my lungs. My heart. Hell, maybe you'd find some way to swap my brain out and keep me full here. That may delay the inevitable for a couple more years, but, we both know that my time's up."

"But I could–"

"Shh, it's okay." Dell raised his right hand, his Gunslinger, and brushed away some tears. "I'll have to die like everyone else. This machine, me, it'll fall apart and break eventually. You could try and fix it, keep it standing for as long as possible, but sooner or later it's gonna crumble."

He exhaled. "I know we were supposed to be gods together, but even gods have their time of rest." He grinned warmly.

Ludwig quivered. "...klar. If that's the way you want to go, I suppose that's how it'll go."

Dell yawned. "I know you wanna talk. There's a good chance I won't wake up tomorrow, but I can't stand to be up any longer. Sorry... I would if I could."

"Don't feel sorry! I'm happy enough you're able to tell me this now." He hugged Dell, wrapping his arms around him. "Would you like me to carry you to bed?"

"That'd be nice. Thank you, darlin'."

Ludwig scooped him up, supporting his back in one arm and holding up his legs in the other. He did it slowly and with care to not hurt Dell (although one wrong move and Ludwig very well may blow his back out doing this). His body was lighter than normal, yet still warm and comforting.

Ludwig carried him through the house, eventually ending up in their bedroom. He set him down on their king-sized bed, pulling the blankets over. He slipped his glasses off his face, placing them on the nightstand.

"Gettin' the royal treatment for dying now, aren't I?" he joked. "Though, thanks for doing this, doc. You don't need to."

"For you? I'd do anything. The least I can do is bring you to bed, mein Liebling." He took off his collared shirt and put on a plain white one. "Though, I do have one request."

"Fire away."

"May we...cuddle?"

"Is that even a question?" Dell said. "C'mon."

Ludwig slipped under the covers and rested his head against the pillow. He looked at his husband, a quiet sadness washing over him. Without hesitation, he threw his arms around him, bringing him close.

It was the nearest thing to a perfect moment. Dell was soft and snuggly. His skin was scratchy and rough, but beautifully comforting. He relaxed against him. He listened to the gentle thump of his heart. Life. Something that told him that he was still alive. He clung to that heartbeat, never wanting to lift his head.

Quietly, those tears returned once more. Slipped out of his eyes and raced down his face. His breath shook with anxiety and sadness.

Through it all, he felt Dell pat him on the back. "It's okay, darlin'. It's gonna be okay," he said. "I'm here with you."

"I love you..." Ludwig struggled to say. "I love you so, so much."

"I love you too. More than anything else. Don't forget that, alright?"

Ludwig sighed as he nestled himself closer to Dell. He didn't care if he seemed weak. He loved Dell. More than anybody else. Nowhere had he seen another man who cared about him– who understood him like Dell did. He found the only other man who was like him, and he didn't want to let go. Not yet. Not now.

But, the end has to come at some time, doesn't it? Sooner or later the story has to end. Gods move on and retire. Rest. They've worked hard and long for many years. They deserve to lie down and sleep, even if it was hard to say goodbye.

Ludwig didn't know when he finally dozed off, but it was a dreamless sleep. One moment he was silently sobbing into Dell. The next, the sun was peering through the blinds and his birds were chirping away.

He smacked his lips and rubbed his eyes. He turned over to Dell, seeing him laying on his back. He looked peaceful there. His face was relaxed, with the faint remnants of a smile on it. Deep in sleep.

Or, that's what he thought until he noticed that Dell's chest wasn't moving. It was still. In fact, he wasn't breathing at all.

Ludwig's heart dropped. He knew what happened. He didn't want to believe it.

"No, no..." he muttered. He inched closer, grabbing Dell's hand and holding his head. He was cold. Colder than any other body he'd felt before.

"Wake up," he pleaded, "aufwachen, bitte. Please, Dell... Don't leave me."

No response.

He was gone. There was no denying it. Ludwig couldn't begin to think of some excuse to deny this situation any further. No breathing. No sign that he was still kicking around.

He was dead. His true love passed away while he slept.

The tears returned once more with a vengeance. His breath was jagged and strained. Grief consumed him, sinking into his very soul. He couldn't think of anything else. All he could comprehend was one harrowing truth: his husband was dead.

He rested his head against Dell's chest. The absent heartbeat brought no comfort. Dell was dead. He would never see him alive again.

Death is natural, but that doesn't make the loss of the only one you ever loved any better, does it?

[batsinurbelfrey]

Having a post that breached containment with a funny haha joke about Grammarly truly has reminded me that this is the "no fucking nuance" site, and also how while MY circles on here are all people my age, there are def still like, teens here.

Like bro if u don't wanna use a service fine, but lets be SO for real about whats realistic and whats not tho pitch a fit about in the current world we live in. What things are useless to "protest" other than to virtue signal, what hypocrisy it is to take certain stances and then use other services that do the SAME shit. Im not saying anyone HAS to use Grammarly, but the biggest thing I've been getting ppl in my notes and inbox about is "you know Grammarly uses your input to train AI models right?" or even "why the fuck are you using Grammarly do you not even care about writers rights?" [the audacity of some ppl, Yes ofc I do, 3 clicks to my profile could show you I'm an artist for a living and very anti AI lol] and its like, ok? are you aware the site you are typing into RIGHT NOW to harass me ALSO DOES THAT???? LMAO. like fine you want to play the protest game? get off tumblr, get off twitter, get off google docs, get off nearly every free web-hosted service at this point. its also such a weird one to choose to put your foot down on. I suppose many people choose it to get their panties in a twist over because it probably feels "more actionable" to them as a "luxury" [i.e. "I cant give up tumblr! all my friends live in there! but a spelling and grammar checking app? sure I'll dump that" and like. good for you? but its kind of a privileged take. Not to go all "god that's such a tumblr take" on this but I use Grammarly for DISABILITY ACCESSIBILITY. I use it because I have tremors and type like ass and having the easy pop up text replacements are a huge help for my typing speed [a thing you need to be p good at for most desk jobs these days], I use it because I grew up with multiple learning disabilities in a low-income school that couldn't give me extra help or time and thus, I never really LEARNED good spelling or grammar, like at all. I NEED the help because sometimes I genuinely don't KNOW I'm breaking a grammar rule or the word I typed out isn't even CLOSE to right, and again. those are things that are CRUCIAL to not fuck up in a modern-day corporate workplace. I can be as smart as ever and great at my job but if I write my communications in a way that makes me look uneducated, people are going to make assumptions about me, and its going to deadlock my career progression, and with that comes a lack of access to keeping up with having a living wage etc etc. I'm not saying anyone HAS to use Grammarly , do whatever you wanna do man, but for FUCKS sake extend the same kindness to others. Stop calling in the firing squad for even the smallest "infraction" to your own personal beliefs. because AGAIN, my "feeding" Grammarly so that I might be able to have an access tool to make my life more manageable is no different than you "feeding" ai by typing ur posts here or anywhere else on the web Certain things are just facts of life now, we've lost the ability to really stop them as an individual, and sure, we SHOULD organize to try to make change as a collective. but yall are really giving "blame the one person who occasionally uses a plastic straw for all of global warming instead of going after the mega-corporations truly at fault" energy is its obnoxious as all get out

[clockwork-reveries]

tumblr in the neoteric world

☢️ becquerel-tears Follow

confession. i'm fr TIRED of humans treating corinthians like shit or things that dont feel. it's the little things that make me want to quit my job and i don't know, scam the elderly for a living? (that was a joke.) i love my job don't get me wrong, it makes me the happiest i've been in a long time. today at work while i was busy helping a coworker see what was wrong with their terminal, some dude walked right up to me. he was maybe, i don't know, late 30's, early 60's? it's so hard to tell humans apart. and put his FINGER underneath the panel on my NECK. i smacked his hand away so hard he yelled, but of course i didn't care he almost got to some delicate shit! all because he couldn't stop himself from getting his grubby manchild hands off me.

🔁☢️ becquerel-tears Follow

fucking. respect corinthians. before the empyrean war some of you complained we were replacing humanity, and now that we did all the work for y'all in the war, you treat us like servants and objects that just are there. we'll be around for a long long time. and a ton of us won't forget this.

🔁🔥 antiflesh-posting Follow

I wasn't made during the war, so maybe my comments aren't valid, but I totally agree, OP. Humans have become so full of themselves, it's revolting. I'm sorry about your issues as well. We've got a group on TMB about how to reduce human population, and we also think you might be better suited especially if you live in a smaller city, as you've stated in previous posts.

🔁☢️ becquerel-tears Follow fucker didn't read my post, it's so obvious. do NOT talk to me about "reducing the human population" you fucking edgelord wannabe terrorists. blocked and reported. I DON'T CARE THAT THIS IS A BOT, ANTHROPOPHOBES AREN'T EVER WELCOME ON MY BLOG

38 notes

💌 bl33ding-hartzzz Follow

i got suuuuuper bord.. im thinking abt trying tht weird "simul8d food" some company made around 2020 for corinthians. desc says ur supposed to "taste" it like the real thing. im rlly sus abt it but somebodys selling it on ebay for almost 7 bucks so i dont think ill be losing a lot!

💌 bl33ding-hartzzz Follow

update it arrived!!! i got the icecream 1......!1! apparently ur supposed to bite it? huh? ( •᷄‎ࡇ•᷅ )

💌 bl33ding-hartzzz Follow

Oh. oh i c why nobody wants this. its a scam we dont even knw what flavors n tastes are like anywaze.

AKA it suckssss. ˙◠˙

75 notes

⚙️ vermina-overlord Follow

139 notes

 🍅 camillcamillaeleon Follow

yall after that fic i made was thinking about trying to make the custom corinthian by myself does anyone have any tutorials i can follow? i think im gonna use crisp's design when i make him but maybe ill have to make a super tiny version if thats possible so it costs less? does anyone know if you can create small corinthians?

🔁💫 all-antipurpose Follow

Bestie??? You cant???? Just make Corinthians??? I get you used to customize Furbys but theyre not fucking dolls, dude. Does nobody realize how horrible it is to be playing god for funsies? EDIT: I wasn't calling Corinthians dolls

🔁🍅 camillcamillaeleon Follow

its not like im going to FORCE them to be what i want i just want them to look like it yknow every time i post like something this youre always one of the first people to reply can you just get off my dick already

🔁💫 all-antipurpose Follow

Then just draw it? Why do you need a 200+ pound AI to do it for you? I find it really weird how youre not concerned about the ethic issues about just making life just because you feel like nor have you addressed it at all. Am I in the wrong here for thinking everyone in the notes is delusional for calling me a cop just because you guys watch too many sci-fis? Don't make Corinthians.

285 notes

🍋‍🟩 starberry-skyfield Follow

𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐓𝐨 𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐎𝐏

Name: Genevieve

Height: 166 cm

Favorite show: Resident Alien

Favorite snack: Caramel popcorn

Software: ? What does this mean? Windows 11

First song: Don't remember

Favorite game: Sims 3

Hair color: Dark blonde

Countries traveled: Canada, Japan

Dogs or cats: Dogs

Eye color: Blue

Last song listened: Liquid Smooth by Mitski

Phone wallpaper: I like green

TAGGED BY: @kermiance TAGGING: @crownless-crimson (i hope you're feeilng better!) @poloniusweeps @mixomadie @shutupchrissy (i know you like fillouts)

15 notes

🔥v1butalmostirl Follow

APPARENTLY ONE OF MY FRIENDS IS JUST UNABLE TO RECOGNIZE COLORS? WHY DOESNT ANYONE TALK ABOUT HOW SOME WAR-MADE CORINS ARE REALLY BADLY MADE? HES FROM THE EAST COAST AND HIS SYSTEMS DON'T RECOGNIZE BLUE FROM GREEN AND MORE EVEN THOUGH HIS OPTICS CAN SEE LITERALLY SEE IT ITS DISGUSTING HOW PERSONHOOD WAS DEVELOPING FOR CORINTHIANS BUT IMMEDIATELY DIMINISHED DURING THE WAR SOME WAR-MADES HAVE NEVER FELT KINDNESS

1,056 notes

🌷cordie-draws Follow

Sometimes I want to be human Organic, real, warm, soft Cartilage and bone Blood, enamel, keratin Does anyone feel me? Sometimes it upsets me so bad when I realize I can't smell soap or the candles in my kitchen. Or when I make food for my cat. Or when I wake and realize that I can't stretch or yawn. But that would mean I'd lose myself... because humans definitely have feelings different. But would that be so bad? Burned, with ashes, rising up into beauty and wonder?

118 notes

☁️ puppetprancinq Follow

dumb question i know but do you guys wash your vessel plates with a clorox wipe one at a time or hop in a shower if youre sealed

on sunday mornings i like to put them all in the dishwasher because i really dont have another use for em. and then when i get em out its like ahhhh. squeaky clean

151 notes

💾 crownless-crimson Follow

𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐓𝐨 𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐎𝐏

Name: JZK (Not my real name)

Height: 6' / 185 cm

Favorite show: Star Trek: The Next Generation

Favorite snack: I can't eat.

Software: IceLemon v6.8

First song: Yesterday by The Beatles. Someone who worked at where I was developed had a cassette player lying around. The mic barely picked it up but I was delighted to hear music for the first time.

Favorite game: Most of the Amnesia series, Resident Evil 2 and 3, Halo 1 and 2. I'm not good at shooting games but I like the stories most of the time.

Hair color: Brown

Countries traveled: USA (I'm British), Germany, Norway, Italy

Dogs or cats: Dogs. I plan on getting one.

Eye color: Red

Last song listened: Cloudbusting by Kate Bush

Phone wallpaper:

TAGGED BY: @starberry-skyfield Thank you, Genevieve. TAGGING: @becquerel-tears, @bl33ding-hartzzz, @v1butalmostirl, @liminalbrainwave, @clockwork-dreamings

9 notes

️♣️spinneretgods Follow

Fellas is it gay to help a corin with their maintenance and then accidentally screw their head completely off and then laugh about it as you play a game of soccer and then suddenly they explode violently like the guy from daft punk and you sit there clutching the remains of them sobbing even though you know the day would come to an end

🔁🌽i-give-people-cobsofcorn Follow

Here.

🔁♣️ spinneretgods Follow

POST CANCELLED GET OUT OF MY DUNGEON

8,948 notes

[maya-matlin]

I love your takes on OTH and agree with nearly all of them! You and an anon had interesting thoughts on Julian and why he seems perfect on paper but was so meh in reality, and I laughed out loud when you pointed out that the writers radically changed his personality at least once or twice a season. I have a mutual who watched most of season six, skipped season seven, and was stunned when she tuned into season eight and was like ‘wait, since when is Julian the adorkable comic relief—-who is this?!’ I think for me I got a weird social climbing vibe from him, which would be annoying but understandable if we’d met him in high school but is a quality I find really off putting in adults. He’s obsessed with the so-called popular group of a high school he didn’t even attend and even says something gross (brulian fans fins it cute but no) after the first time he and Brooke have sex about now getting why she had been popular . He just seems to really care about popularity/social status and the fact that he himself was uncool in high school a decade ago and making a good impression in Hollywood and all that. I actually like that Lucas took an instant dislike to him because so did I!

Thank you! Yeah, Julian was an odd character. He's not a bad guy or even particularly irritating. It's just that the writers were unable to decide which personality to give him. So to begin with, Julian is this slick, underhanded guy who shows up in Tree Hill to make Lucas's movie while also fucking with Peyton. But once Lucas discovers Peyton's past with Julian, that goes away pretty quickly. They stuck with confident, almost worldly Julian when he first started hooking up with Brooke. Season 7 was kind of a mixture of season 6 Julian while also giving him more nerdy moments. Season 8 Julian wasn't even the same character. He couldn't do a simple high five. He did matching Halloween costumes with his mom. There were jokes sprinkled in about manly man Nathan who likes things like sports and beer vs Julian who is effeminate and knows how to pick out beautiful flower arrangements where it's clear who the butt of the joke is supposed to be. In season 9, they tried and failed to make Julian a darker, edgier character by having him go through a self destructive phase after leaving his son in the hot car. There's no actual coherency to his personality or character development. He's almost completely defined by being Brooke's love interest and to some degree, an awkward replacement for Lucas who doesn't quite fit in. It's to the point that Mark Schwahn apparently wanted to rip off the Dawson's Creek finale so badly that they once again decided to "go meta" by having Julian create a tv series about Lucas's book after they'd already done the same story line with the aborted movie back in season 6. Naturally, Julian writes himself into the series, stealing away Lucas's winning shot at the state championship and being the one to make the sex tape with Brooke.

That's an interesting take that I can't entirely disagree with. It's so fucking weird that the Julian we met in season 6 would ever care about this random group of high schoolers from a small town. We're invested because we've been watching their story lines since the first season, but you'd think Julian would have grown beyond trying to fit in with the popular kids and had met and bonded with his own "people" back in LA. I realize Julian being a regular required him to eventually mingle with Brooke's friend group, but it could have been done in a much more casual way. Oof, yeah. Brooke had tried so hard to define herself by things unrelated to sex and looks back on her sexual history during her teenage years as something.. not quite shameful, but also not something she's proud of. It wasn't the right thing to say at that moment, and if Julian read Lucas's book he would have known there was much more depth to Brooke than that. While I don't personally dislike Julian, I do think he was kind of desperate to fit in and receive validation from the popular kids. Again, I struggle to understand why he wanted validation specifically from the OTH characters considering he was already working in Hollywood when we met him. Julian Baker was basically two different characters awkwardly smashed together. I like him well enough, but in all honesty he's carried by the fact that he isn't Lucas. Lucas is so flawed and indecisive for most of the series that even though he's a far more dynamic and consistently written character, his massive lows make it easy to forget his highs.

[cmyk-anaglyph-honeycomb]

Helluva Boss S2 E5 fixes

These are some scene changes between Barbie and the counselor that make their interaction less gross. First off, I like the show. Yes, it has problems but everything does. But denying what happened in the episode isn't grooming, is just incorrect.

She refers to him as a kid and a teenager in the episode. Sorry, but an off-to-the-side tweet doesn't change that.

The lines:

"I don't wanna fucking hear it, kid."

Barbie is interrupting him while saying this. There is literally no one else in the scene she could be referring to.

"Do you have any idea who easy teenagers are so easy to manipulate?"

He then immediately responds with "Hey. No, I'm not."

He is straight-up refers to himself. There isn't a single other person that they could be talking about. There isn't a second accomplice because the second the guy died, Barb is out of the job. It wouldn't matter as much if there was someone else.

Fixes:

In the first line, have Barb call in dude instead of 'kid'. Why they went with 'kid' instead of any other general-sounding identifier is beyond me.

For the second line, replace teenagers with virgins or something. The rest of the dialog can play out the same and nothing change. The rest of the episode can go on and nothing changes. The counselor being underage means nothing to the show but makes it weird.

(That and Millie getting a nude, while pretending to be a young teen, from a guy who was clearly WAY past legal age.)

Honestly, sometimes it feels like the show crosses lines like this just to get more attention. Yeah, the offensive show is offending people. But the more it stacks up the harder it gets to watch.

(just some thoughts passed this point)

The fact that Barbie and Blitzo's storyline was the B plot makes so little sense. Isn't Blitzo's character journey supposed to be important or something? Why is finding his sister, the one family member he as left, not matter next to a camp infiltration plot?

So we can have a Millie episode, with isn't what happens. Millie nor Moxxie grow or change or learn anything. Moxxie has always praised her and she has always been shown to be the better of the two. The only exception is with her parents in one episode for a few minutes. If that was ever a problem it should have been shown more there.

I'd be less hard on it if it was next to Luna getting a shot or some other non-consequential second plot but it isn't. Blitzo is trying to track down his sister who he hasn't seen in who knows how long and it takes up less than half of the runtime. That time could have been used to explain WHY Barbie doesn't want to see him. Or at the very least hint at it.

Would building around hell would have also been nice. But instead, we get Millie being awesome, which we've seen plenty of. And Moxxie feels inadequate, which we have also gotten a lot of.

Wrote more on that than I meant to. Hope there aren't too many spelling/grammar mistakes, I'm not reading through it to check.

Again I want to say that I like the show but you can make sex jokes without involving kids. Not to mention that there are plenty of dark-humor jokes to work with.

[accioquill]

I wanted to share one of my favorite chapters from my current WIP!

Sebastianx f!MC\OC -mostly fluff with a little bit of suggestive content (you can find links to the full piece in my bio!)

Summary: Sebastian's thoughts after his first time with Maeve (my MC\OC)

-Sebastian Sallow's POV-

We laid on the sofa for hours; our naked bodies intertwined with one another. Maeve laid her head on my chest, letting her disheveled hair fall over her shoulders.

The curious bruises on her back have nearly all healed. I still haven't heard the story behind them, but that was a tale for another day.

I delicately traced circles over her skin, musing over the moments of pure pleasure we just shared. Our bodies moving in tandem with one another like we were one entity. Just moments before, we were having one of our worst arguments we've ever had.

Jealousy turned me into an animal that I could no longer contain. When I saw her smile with him, Laugh with him, kiss him–it made me seethe. Once he grabbed her arse, I lost it. She pushed me to a limit I didn't even know I had.

I had so many questions. So much to say, but it all seemed so trivial now. I knew I needed her–that I wanted her in every way a person could want someone. She meant the world to me, and I was tired of pretending that there wasn't anything between us. I couldn't keep her at a distance any longer.

My thoughts continued to wander as I let my eyes roam around a room I've never been in before.

"What is this place?"

"It's my undercroft." She snickered to herself.

"Is this where you'd disappear to last year?"

She nodded sleepily. "It's my room of requirement. 'Supposed to come equipped with everything I need. Or so I'm led to believe."

"So, say you need a bath..."

"Mhmm. That's the idea."

"Why did you never mention it?"

She shrugged. "I didn't think you'd want to see it."

I felt hurt by her words, even though I knew she didn't mean to make me feel this way. Her casual tone made me realize I made her feel like what she was going through didn't matter to me–that her needs weren't important.

"Well. It is impressive." I looked at the clock hanging about the entryway. "Merlin's beard, it's almost morning."

She stretched her arm out and laid it over my shoulder as if to stop me from trying to leave. "I could stay here with you forever." she whispered.

She had no idea the lengths I would go to make that happen.

"Well, if we are going to stay a while, perhaps we could use a blanket or two." I suggested. She nodded and sat up, covering her chest with her arms.

"Don't you think we're past modesty at this point." I joked.

"Well, I'm still a lady." She stuck her tongue out and hurried off the couch to find a blanket. I watched her walk away, taking a good look at her backside as it bounced with each of her steps. She disappeared into another room and I could hear her shuffling things around.

I took this opportunity to explore. I slipped my trousers on and wandered around all her plants and potions. Three cauldrons caught my attention as they sat on their burners. I attempted to remove the lid from one of them.

"Careful, Sallow. You never know what I could be brewing in there." Maeve giggled as she spread a blanket out on the sofa.

"Oh please. I can handle anything." I playfully scoffed. I lifted the lid and a misty bouquet of roses and wildflowers filled the air.

"Are you making your own perfume? It smells just like you."

Maeve let out a laugh and shook her head. "It's Amortentia."

My eyes widened, realizing what I had just said. I quickly replaced the lid and scooted away from the cauldrons.

"Aren't we supposed to brew that later in the year?" I asked, trying to save myself any further embarrassment.

She shrugged again. "Sharp wanted me to get a head start, I guess."

I took another glance at the room, admiring her work.

"Come under the blanket with me, Sebastian." Her voice was sweet and airy.

How could I resist a request like that?

I made my way back to the sofa and sank into the cushions next to her. I wrapped my arm around her as she leaned into my chest.

"So tell me: What exactly do I smell like?" I could feel her smile as she nuzzled her face into me.

"Like heaven." I said yearningly.

"Oh? And you know what that's like?"

"I imagine it's a place filled with endless moments of pleasure like the one we just partook in."

"Are you saying you were in heaven, Sebastian Sallow?" I heard her giggle softly.

She tilted her head to look at me and flashed me her infamous grin. She shifted under the blanket, and moved her body around to straddle me again.

She pushed her bare chest against me and brought her lips to my ear.

"Would you like me to take you there again?" She whispered.

My heart melted.

[hoxooster]

Payday Q&A thing! M, T, X.

M is for MASKS: favourite mask/s?

I've got a few. I gotta give some love to two masks that I made:

Full Metal Doge and 80's Cowboy. The former is actually the first mask, material, pattern, and colors that I got when I downloaded PD2 on my da's computer. I'm known by this mask, and even though I haven't worn it in a long while (I've got a personal, 'wear as many of the masks as you can' challenge that I've been working on), I still love it dearly. As for 80's Cowboy, I just really liked how it came out when I first made it--it's probably one of my best masks, design-wise.

As for untampered with masks, I love these ones:

And, for a lil' bit of fun, these are my favorite PD:TH masks:

T is for TASER: most surprising moment/thing that happened in-game?

Hm. Well, I can think of a couple things. For PD:TH, a lot of 'em are just things dealing with my buddy, Wolfee. Like, him finally agreeing to accept my friend request (after much begging on my part), that time he found out that you can get stuck inside the police transport trucks on Green Bridge (and he stayed in there so I would get stuck and would have to fight my way out, the cheeky fucker)...

... how I earned my Steam username by impressing him (Diamond, 145, me and him with bots. Went loud 'cause the code didn't work. Him and the bots went into custody. I had to survive an assault wave, then dom 3 cops to get them back. He complimented me, and thus my Steam username was created and cemented.), and a bunch of other shit that I could spend hours talking about.

For PD2, there was the time that the GO Bank vault was just open--didn't know that that was a possibility until it happened to me...

... the time Wolfee showed that he cared about me enough to threaten one of our friends with bodily harm if I was downed...

... the multiple times I messed with Emma with the artifacts on Shadow Raid (she mains Chains and had never gotten his mask in a drop, then I got one after torturing her XD)...

... and some other things here 'n there that I love to talk about as part of my 'Old Man Stories' while in-call with people. I've made a lot of fond memories in this game, and I look forward to making a lot more, ya know?

Honestly, the most surprising thing is that you made Breakin' Feds a comfort heist for me, Red. Jeezum Crow, I hate it here.

X is for XENODIAGNOSIS: would you want Bain's disease to be curable and why/not?

No, because his death needed to happen. Simon Viklund wanted to leave OVERKILL, so he left to pursue other things and hangout with his best friend, and I'm happy for him.

As a Payday fan, this is devastating. Simon defined what Payday is--and I'm not joking. His portrayal of Bain guides players from a place of camaraderie and respect that no other contractor has ever even touched, and probably never will. His Cloaker dialogue is filled with memes and jokes at the expense of the fanbase, but, ya know, sometimes we all need to be taken down a few pegs whenever we get too cocky in-game. And his music? Jesus, his music gives both Paydays a feel that cannot be replicated--we've seen the examples that have been put forward by others, and they just don't compare. Now, I'm not sayin' that those songs ain't great, but they obviously just don't feel the same. Simon was the Heart and Soul of Payday, and his loss is felt deeply by those that know and hear the difference. It actually makes me very worried about PD3, 'cause it's just not gonna feel right without him there. But, it is what it is.

As a Payday player, I'm glad that it was handled in-game, so people wouldn't be left questioning just what in the hell happened to Bain. I hate that shit when that happens in TV shows--like, when characters disappear or get replaced by different actors without an explanation. Anyway, the decisions made on how to go about it were... strange, to put it lightly, but at least something was done. And, even though I hate bodyswapping narratives, I'm not peeved by Bain's ending. It was an alright send off, for what they could do on short notice in a sinking ship. Closure's a luxury that not all games have, and I'm glad that we got it with Payday's most important character.

And, as a decent person, I'm glad that they just killed off Bain in general. I dunno everything that went on behind the scenes at OVERKILL while Bo was imploding everything, but I can make some educated guesses. It wasn't good. For anyone. There's a lot of hurt there that's difficult to come back from, and, honestly, it's probably best if the OVERKILL team and Simon (and especially Ulf) don't work with each other again. Plus, it's probably just easier, logistically.

So, as much as I will miss Simon defining Payday, and Bain in his entirety, I'm glad that his disease wasn't presented in-game as curable and that his character was given a proper send off. He's more than earned his retirement and I hope that he enjoys laying mad pipe in the Oval Office.

[anxiouslyfred]

Break Away

Summary: Virgil and Remus decide that they don't want to spend the entirity of the first time they meet listening to their friend and brother respectively judging their jokes or ideas. Instead they break away to find their own choice of first date.

Warnings: death mentions kinda, sex mentions

/\/\

When they first suggested meeting up, or rather when Patton first insisted on joining Virgil to meet Remus, Virge had said that he'd be annoyed with Patton's scolding within half an hour.

A glance at the clock showed that it had only been ten minutes since Virgil and Patton had arrived at the cafe, most of which had been spent introducing each other and joking over replacing their soulmates with the stars of the memories they'd dreamt.

Remus was already pissed off at the preaching.

Honestly it was probably made worse because Roman kept attempting to join in, or saying things like “I've told him that a million times,” or “Mother has tried explaining that. Remus doesn't agree.”

The most positive thing Remus could make of the encounter was that Virgil was showing a similar humour, although more self-deprecating, which meant the few scolding comments directed at him also included compliments and chides not to insult himself. Still exhausting and given how long the pair seemed to have known each other, likely entirely useless.

Virgil was also clearly trying to meet his eyes across the table, head gesturing to the door as soon as Remus looked over. “You know, I'm pretty sure you two can't have any concerns over our safety now we've all met and you know what soulmate connections are like.” Virgil began standing and downing his drink even though he'd barely taken a sip so far.

“Definitely. You said it yourself on the flight over here, instant romance and all that shit. Interlopers no matter how well meaning aren't necessary. I'm a gentleman after all. I wait until the fourth date to suggest any kind of gangbang or orgy.” Remus nodded, standing as well, and gesturing for Virgil to lead the way out of the cafe. He thought the imitation of Roman was pretty good actually, but apparently his words just caused offence at the exclamations that followed him out of the door.

For a few moments they just walked together, half expecting to have to run if one of the other pair decided to chase after them. They managed to get about a block before Virgil started snickering.

“Please tell me Patton was all scandalised. He got so uptight if I ever mentioned your sex jokes, I've not brought them up since like the second time I spoke about you to him.” He grinned, trying to tame it into a smirk but failing.

“Speechless, he couldn't even form words to argue with the suggestion of a gangbang.” Remus cackled. “Are you taking me to a murder den?”

Virgil's smirk when he glanced to him was deadly enticing. “Nope, but I might before you fly home. See if we can convince Roman he's flying home alone after I've murdered you.”

“Ooooh, how are you gonna murder me? Gonna do it spider style?” Remus leant into him, arm once again falling over his shoulder.

“Tempting, I was actually thinking of something more constricting, rope around your neck or something. Venom or violence after wearing you out with sex just seems set to fail with your proclivities trying to gain immunity to all poisons.” Virgil mused, absently reaching to his shoulder to hold Remus's hand there and pretending not to notice the other swooning heavily onto him. “Besides, we're just going to a pub I love the aesthetic of. Patton takes like a month of convincing to go in because there's a coffin made into a coffee table.”

“I'm going to ask if it's used and who's in there.” The yell was the warning before he was being dragged down the street by Remus, looking around to try and find the pub he'd mentioned.

It set Virgil off snickering again, as much as he could while basically jogging along. “We'd get there quicker if you let me lead, or at least give directions.”

“Start giving them then.” The words were expected, being thrown into a fireman carry so all he could see was Remus's butt, was not. At least Remus turned around and started walking backwards so Virgil could see where they were going. “Hit the cheeks when you want me to turn.” Remus's voice lilted as he gave the suggestion.

Part of Virgil wanted to tug his hood over his face just so he couldn't see the stares a few people were now directing towards them, but he'd expected something bizarre to come from the meeting so went along with it. “Is this your way of getting to do a dramatic turn and reveal what the pub is like once we're in there?” He teased instead.

“Nope, it's my way of asking you to touch the butt, and get to have a good grope myself too. Think I could position you so you rut against my shoulder until you come while we're walking?” There was definitely a grin in Remus's words, as he did seem to change Virgil's position slightly while speaking.

“Exhibitionism is second date activities at a minimum. Turn left and stick to the wall otherwise you'll make roadkill of you.” Virgil countered, hitting the leg that was left from his view to make sure Remus turned the right way.

It wasn't far to the pub, but anxieties definitely grew when Virgil saw it, across a relatively busy roundabout from where they are. “Put me down! Now!” He demanded after barely entertaining the thought of figuring out how to get them across safely. Remus was quick to obey this order just as he had all the others. “If you want to keep walking backwards, then fine, but this is a busy road so move at my pace when I drag you over it.” Virgil kept the commanding tone, but mentally noted the eager to please nods he got in return as he started looking for pauses in traffic they could cross during.

“Dying together in a tragic event can wait for another day.” Remus agreed, moving easily with Virgil.

If you asked anyone in the town, they'd call the pub a relatively normal one, unusual coffee tables aside. It wasn't really decorated morbidly at all aside from the coffin, but still kept the lights dim enough that Virgil liked being their, thoughts of death, existence and how easy it is to blend in running through his mind.

If you asked Remus, the place was perfect, but give him a couple hours, 3 pints and some paints, he could make it the nightmare it was crying out to be.

He decided he would treat this relationship with his soulmate exactly the same way.