#if ur seeing this you know who you are and I love ur art
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Astro Observations~ 48
Venus square Pluto men tend to have a really weird relationship with women. Can have a big love-hate relationship when it comes to women. I’ve seen these men treat their guy friends with more respect than their partners
Leo sun x Pisces sun mix in friendship is so underrated. They really match eachothers creativity & can inspire eachother a lot art wise
Jupiter in the 1st house makes someone very jolly naturally. Even if they are in a bad mood it rarely shows. Can also make someone pretty tall in a lot of cases (not all)
Cap risings can have very visible bones. Could’ve been told by others to “eat a sandwich “
You can feel more likely to create art or sing when the moon transit is in Pisces (even if you’re not the type to want to do that stuff on the regular).
Venus in the 8th house natives are very into hookup culture. Gets into a lot of unconventional relationships. Not really the types that wanna be “wifed up” I’ve noticed. They just here for a good time fr.
Pisces sun Aries moons are great manifestors (especially with an earth rising to stabilize the energy) with a cap rising for example I can imagine these people to be unstoppable when they have a goal.
Mars in Taurus’s usually prefer slower sex to fast sex. (Unless it’s in the 8th house) they are super sensual and want to enjoy every pleasure to the max. Going too fast can piss them off/leave them unsatisfied.
Venus in 2nd house synastry can have very long make out sessions together. Even if you aren’t comfortable with kissing this aspect will make you want to kiss them for HOURS.
Saturn in the 8th house people on the other hand kinda lack sensuality a lot of the time. They can skip foreplay and go straight to the act. Very “cold” sexual experiences.
Juno in the 1st house people are the best people to marry. Can attract some pretty selfish partners tho unfortunately:(
When a Gemini Venus has a crush on someone it’s like painfully obvious. Everyone usually already knows.
Jupiter in the 8th gives big 🍆 energy
Uranus in the 5th house are rarely ever fully single. The types to go on a lot of dates or dates someone outta nowhere or unexpectedly
Saturn in the 5th house have a natural awkwardness around their crushes
Venus in Libras pull game is so strong, they have so many admirers & ppl who have crushes on them
Having a Venus in retrograde in a detriment sign (Aries/scorpio) can make you come off as really rude to others or super vain
I also notice if not severely afflicted Venus in retrograde natives actually have a higher chance of marrying their soulmates than direct Venus natives
Taurus moons either have very a sloppy basic asf sense of fashion or its super chic & creative as hell no in between.
Lilith dominant women are usually treated like shit by other women a lot. Men can see them as someone they just wanna hook up with. It’s actually really sad what these people go thru.
Most fucked up friendship award goes to Pluto in the 11th house folks. Friends could’ve been really jealous of you or your relationship with other friends. Ur friends could also lack extreme boundaries with you and almost act more like a toxic partner. Friends get super obsessed & possessive of you!
Sun in the 9th house people have a gift usually for learning new languages. Could be the types to speak multiple languages.
Pisces mars can be super lazy. Could be the types to ask you to grab the the remote when it’s right next to them
Jupiter in the 4th house prevents you from being homeless. Regardless of your income you always tend to find a really spacious cute home.
People with a 10th house stellium are more likely to “fall in love” with their career. They are also really love $$.
Sun in the (1st, 5th & 11th) house people usually thrive in big social settings.
Sun in the 2nd house could be the breadwinners of the family. Could’ve been the first to break a poverty generational curse. Usually seen as the ones who “made it out the hood” iyk what I mean.
Venus in 2nd house natives face cards are LETHAL
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warning im a yapper
hello ummm just wanted to say!!! i really like the dynamic you give fresh and nightmare/color with the whole “cat who goes to different houses to get fed twice” thing. nightmare and his weird cat that he has probably locked in a basement a few times. color and this guy he picked off the road because he looks weird and decided he can solve this mess. fresh does not have any strong personal feelings towards either of them.
i very much so like the comic thing where nightmare and ccino were talking about fresh and ccino thought he was a kitten cat,,, no he is not but he acts like one. “he keeps crawling on my lap” that is a grown man get him away!!!! he has a dog cage i think that he is put in sometimes for naughty behavior. he doesn’t really care because he’s allowed his gameboy though. do you think nightmare ever sprays him with water when he does something bad. and this is like a grown adult. what
maybe i just like the trope of dehumanization (bonus if with someone who’s weirdly chill with it like fresh) but whatever,,, your art!!!! it gives me life!!! i very much enjoy the pixely type style and how freak you draw fresh. he’s a fucking creature he is. something is wrong with that guy. and i love him soooo much. so creature. he’s the kind of guy to do that thing where you walk on all fours up the stairs.
AND the way you characterize him is!!!! so good!!!!!!!!! he is so fucked up and weird and terrible and manipulative!!!!!!! he takes advantage of others’ empathy and feelings because he has very little of it himself and whenever he does feel it he does not like it!!!!!!! he looks at a guy with a savior complex and goes yeah i can mentally fuck him up for the next seven months to get something cool i want. he’s just actually terrible and i love him for that.
i also!!! don’t know too much about CB but i feel that fresh’s dynamic with them (him?? i forgor) is very interesting from what i have seen!!!!!! and their shimeji is very cute i still need to download it but i like it a lot :3
OKAY UHHH BYE!!!!! I LIKE UR ART A LOT…… HAVE A GOOD DAY!!!!!! 10/10 fresh posting on your blog love him a lot he is my wife (he feels nothing towards me)
THANK YOU!!! I see you mass reblog things sometimes it makes me giggle :-]
I yammer back...
Glad you like the dynamics haha X] Fresh having very little personal feelings about people is fun and interesting to me. As someone who has trouble connecting and low empathy, its nice to depict someone like me. [Guy interacting with people who are a Lot more invested than he is ghghg]
Fresh would only accept being put in the cage because he can teleport out. Anything like that is only for the Aesthetic, which I think Nightmare would still be down for. Shove that thang into some awful little crate, as a treat. [Honestly I think Fresh would like to get in some nice dog crate with a blankie. Small hide / den thing to nap in :-]]
ALSOOOO dehumanization and freak who doesn't mind is my favorite dynamic <333. Fresh doesn't mind because... he isn't a monster? or a human? And he doesn't have a human/monster centric view of the world. Being seen as a human/monster isn't in anyway important to him, because he doesn't seen it as better/worse. He is the way he is, why does it matter?
Its like, I don't think a cat has very strong opinions on the fact it isn't a man. I also think Fresh is incredibly self-centered and when he's on a high point, sees himself as above humans/monsters. Of course he's not seen as human, he's Fresh! he's a sick-nasty parasite! way cooler. [annnddd way cooler that he gets to eat dog-treats. heck yeah!!]
Also I drew up a little thing with CB and Fresh. Its ahh, I like them a lot I just get nervous speaking about them because its suuuch a oc & canon are besttties that it makes me feel a bit cringe... I also get nervous because CB and Fresh have a very, toxic?? friendship.
Fresh is very possessive and strange about it, because this is his Only friend and he has very dysregulated emotions. Not being able to feel positive emotions often makes it so when he does, he gets very odd about it. So its a lot of... trying to keep CB to himself, at the detriment to CB's goals and ambitions. [CB is trying to track his family down, and Fresh uh. knows. where they are. and is not telling him :-)]
I dunno I think Fresh being genuinely friends with someone but also an awful person about it is like, sorely missing from the fandom landscape. He's a bad person but bad people can still form meaningful relationships and!!! I think that should be explored :-]
[They do eventually get somewhere more healthy. As in, Fresh's whole Thing is revealed, a lot of shinanigans happen, CB lives with his family and Fresh and CB reconnect and become friends again, just with like. Fresh trying actively to do "good person things" to make sure CB's family doesn't shoo him off [I ADOREEE good actions for morally ambiguous reasons!!!], and CB with the understanding that his best friend is Kinda a Freak.]
#Fresh#fresh sans#fresh!sans#cb#cb sans#cb!sans#fresh & cb#fresh & nightmare#<-mention#utmv#undertale multiverse#puppydraws#puppy barks#puppyyips#wickjump
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LADS REDESIGNS!! + notes
Note: These are solely for fun, nothing wrong with the original designs and I still plan on drawing their original designs!
I used the Linkon Chibi Report cover because I couldn't be bothered to actually draw them all, my bad LMAO Here's the link to the Love and Deepspace twitter where I got it: https://x.com/Love_Deepspace
THE ART IS NOT MINE, JUST THE REDESIGNS!!(Which even then were highly inspired by the new Valentines cards!)
XAVIER
(His hair is 100% inspired by his "Deluded Fiction card.)
Uh but yeah, as for WHY I decided to go with this design, it has a bit to do with his lore. Please correct me if I get anything wrong, I'm not super aware of everything lore related(Esp not with Xavi's, too focused on Zayne and Caleb :,< )
But Xavier has been traveling for a while, and I think over time he would stop really caring about his appearance, more focused on defeating wanderers and trying to protect the mc.
I also feel like he'd eventually cut his hair again and brush it! So his longer hair is more so an early game thing lol
I also just love the idea of chronic bed head Xavier. Like I imagine his to be a still sleeper, but I think it'd be funny that no matter how still he sleeps, his hair just gets messy again LOL
I just felt like eyebags fit Xavier a lot. I also gave him a mole! I thought his face felt empty without a mole and for some reason I just keep thinking he has one and then I look at him and I'm shocked he doesn't have one LOL But I also think the whole "Your moles are where your lover kissed you most in your past life" soulmate thingy. I think it'd be cute if Daye(one of my mc's. But I think it'd be cute to see moles on where other's mc's kiss Xavier the most!) was a cheek kisser in every timeline.
I think it's like...pretty impossible for Xavier NOT to have a single scar, no matter how good he is right now. I honestly feel that way about most the men(Other then Zayne since he has scars) but like Xavi's a hunter and ur telling me I can't find a single scar on his body?? So I gave him one on his jaw and one on the corner of his mouth! There's multiple more scattered around his body as well!
Speaking of his body, I think he'd have a sleeper build LOL!! Just for those who don't know, a sleeper build is when someone doesn't look strong and doesn't have obvious muscle, but they're strong and the muscle is hidden. I mainly chose this cause of the name LOL
I also gave him heterochromia, I just thought it would look nice LOL
RAFAYEL
I made the tips of his fingers blue, I did think about red and I might try that honestly, but it's because he's a Lemurian. I wanted something kinda subtle to show that(Its not that subtle with Raf though since he's an artist and uses his hands LOL)
I did also give him longer hair and I wanted to keep it fluffy! I might also mess around with a bit more wavy hair! I also made one of his little side bangs just a bit longer for some asymmetry, I wanted to add hair clips but decided against actually drawing it in the end!
I also added a teal streak to his hair. I already like Raf's design so I wasn't really sure what to change, so this just seemed a little fun. I think its like a little artistic streak.
Raf does NOT have muscles, don't even play with me. No matter what the game shows, Raf will always be a little stick that I can pick up.
I also think that Raf might have a few tattoos! Not too many, I think he'd cry getting every tattoo cause it all hurts him. But I also think he would like to see his own body as kind of a canvas(This is also something that I do to myself and others. I love painting on myself and other people) That said I think after a while Raf probably decided against getting anymore tattoos and just doodles and paints on his body, he also likes that he gets to change it up more.
ZAYNE
okay...I prommy I wasn't going to originally give Zayne longer hair. I think the short and clean look suits Zayne and his personality well. But also...I think it's really fun to kind of imagine liking having long hair(A little throwback to "Master of Fate")
Anyways, Zayne with some of his hair tied back is WOOOOO MAMA!! I do wanna play around with a little ponytail too, which is what I think he'd actually do while performing surgeries.
I did give him eyebags as well. Bro works super late sometimes and struggles with nightmares and insomnia, yeah he has eyebags.
I didn't change too much about Zayne honestly. I was thinking about adding glasses permanently but also decided against that. Though I do really like Zayne in glasses so I wanna draw him in them more, I just also hate drawing glasses.
SYLUS
okay...most notably, Sylus has the longest hair! I don't know why but for some reason I always remembered his dragon form having long hair, which it literally doesn't. Anyways, long fluffy mullet Sylus supremacy idk. LOL
^ his hair also has a bit of a red gradient. I didn't want it to be too obvious, but his hair felt a little lacking without it!
Also I gave his arms a dark red gradient, I also think he'd have claws I just didn't draw them. These are also because...half dragon. I know they aren't the hands he had as a dragon, but I wanted them to be more human.
It's so subtle, but I gave him fangs.
I didn't even think about it but I might mess around with slightly pointed ears. a more subtle touch to show he's not human.
I did also think about giving him little horns and wings, but decided against that. I also decided again red streaks on his hair and landed on the gradient instead.
CALEB
Caleb is one of them I'm STICKING with long hair for. He looks so good with a mullet I feel like I belong in a psyche ward.
I gave him little white streaks in his hair, It's supposed to be heat damage but aesthetic from the ✨explosion✨ once again, not really meant to be realistic at all.
Its also so subtle, but I traced one of his pupils with red because I think it'd be even more tragic is Caleb had lost an eye and it got replaced with a mechanic one, like his arm. I think it'd be useful for scanning people and recording their actions too. And I think it'd also be tragic if his vision was warped from this eye, like it doesn't really view properly. I'd have to draw out what I mean eventually cause I don't think I'm making any sense.
i didn't do it but god, him having a little slit in his brow would be so good too, with like a little scar there.
Anyways, I hope you enjoyed my silly little redesigns! Once again the art I edited belongs to Love and Deepspace!
#lads#love and deepspace#lads zayne#lads caleb#lads xavier#lads sylus#lads rafayel#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace caleb#love and deepspace xavier#love and deepspace sylus#love and deepspace rafayel#I told myself I wouldn't give them all long hair but...#it looks too good i couldn't resist#I had fun doing this#I felt like one of those genshin redesign editors#It was my first time doing something like this
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Finished my sketchbook so now its time to dump all my sketches
(Sorry for the style inconsistency lol)
#nicktoons unite#jimmy neutron#timmy turner#jimmytimmy#my art#also one of my favorite nu artist started following me#if ur seeing this you know who you are and I love ur art#ur one of my favorite inspirations <333
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I think the main thing that pisses me off about like 90% of mephiles ships is that people will be like "how old is he??" Look that fanwiki says that he's ten and they RUN with it. Like they don't read further. I'm so convinced that most people don't even know the plot of 06 bc the shit I've seen people draw and write with the characters is just mind boggling.
#trash rambles#like yeah i understand thwt nearly all of the named sonic characters are either minors or unspecified#but like#even if he was actually ten#shipping him with other minor characters would be so weird 😭#plus i dont think it would even matter if he has actually a minor because that uncomfortable power dynamic would still be there with most#other characters#and like#god idk#the amount of dog shit mephiles ships i have to have blocked in my tags is extremely upsetting#LIKE. WDYM?#MARIA??????#STOP IT 😭#tikal makes more sense but that one still makes me uncomfortable#idk i dont even remember all the ones i blocked i just remember that find the maria posts was like#devistating#that and the one person who liked all my 06 posts and was a mephiles and elise shipper (theyre siblings to me so someone like that liking m#art of them is understanbly upsetting)#that being said how old do i think infinite is??? because he doesnt have an official age (that i could find)#personally i think hes anywhere from 19 (at the absolute youngest) to like. early 30s idk 💀#somewhere between thoes idk#the only version of him that has a 100% solid age in my head is for the ghost au and hes 22 in that (bc hes a junior in collage)#n e way#i just woke up so ignore if this is illegible#ugh idk i really try not to be gate-keepy about stuff i like because its annoying but like#i love 06 so much it kinda hurts tl see people just kinda not knowing even the basic plot or like. only going off the fandubs (which i#really enjoy but at a certain point you can only say mephiles is ur favorite and have people quote it at you or in the comments of your 06#posts so many times before you just like. idk. (also ive had people irl tell me 06 sucks after i told them directly it was my favorite sonic#game??? like??? bro you asked ME.))
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[loud song, flashing, the usual eye/decapitation trauma] [takasugi gintama amv set to crucible by sleigh bells]
happy est birthday... sweetpea.
lyrics in cc ↓↓↓
youtube
#art tag#gintama#my beautiful faildaughters#flashing#this one honestly brought to you by mishearing the lyrics. as usual#[imagine in ur minds eye. rather be deceived -> rather need to see you. and. they define you -> there to find you]#i dont know what the kihetai are doing here either.... well i still felt bad for forgetting to include their flashback in the last one lol#so happy birthday boy gets his besties who love to wallow in the corrosive rot with him ^_^#videos
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everyone: he would Not Fucking Do That
me: he would if he was in love
#you guys c'mon have you never developed a doglike personality the likes of which mankind has never seen before out of being in love?#have you never ended up doing shit and saying shit you normally wouldn't?#not only letting your guard down but completely disarming undressing closing ur eyes and laying bare in the grass? to love is to change#this post is specifically about lalo and nacho bcs#do NOT fucking come at me with 'oh this is OOC' how can you fucking know that. you've never seen them have a crush on an enemy in canon#they are dogs and they are fools#lovesick fools#lacho#but also wait i wanna see others take their foolish ships so#fandom#shipping#let me know moots let me know i wanna know who you treat like this in ur writing and art and thoughts at 2am
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Ohhhh i now remember why i got shy about talking abt ocs
24/7 fear that someone will tell me my ideas are cliche/stupid/bad in some other and it will hurt more bc these are my own creations and not just fun and play
#kurjatxt#i was trying 2 explain some stuff and i was immediately like#:/ does this feel like some kinf of weird hype for ancient mysticism and does that go into promoting the current day false ideas plaguing#people that make them drink unpasturized milk :/#is this too based on my view on magic from my enviroment bc it is based on my personal experience on seeking safety in#nostalgia and playing w the idea of balancing what you get from the past and integrating it into the future vs. just being stuck in the#past vs. the danger of completely rejecting the past told through the lense of smth i loved as a child: fantasy/magic/fairytales :/#and could be alienating and immature and demeaningly simple to other people who grew up in an enviroment already more inclined to#this kind of balance :/#or is me thinking about this demeaning to people bc i should be able to trust them to see what i make as silly ramblings by some random#tumble user just exploring their own experiences through story instead of trying to make some large sweeping statements about#the world and its reality :/#or is it bad of me to be careless about bc of COURSE i should put the upmost care into what i put out into the world and make sure that#everything i make is inclusive and as accessible to as many different types of people to relate to :/#or is that dumb is that limiting to art and am i giving a bad example and furthering the idea of people#havibg to make everything as palatable to everyone as possible JUST in case that nobody gets even slightly hurt or annoyed :/#man being a creator is hard OOPS that is also an evil thing to say being a creator is the luckiest thing you can ever be and ur just beinh#a whiny bitchbaby :/#<-#all that just. a small portion of the overthinking#and yk what it started from?#thr statement '<#in this world magic can be kind of more compared to how modern science is approached'#THAT SENTENC3#I AM SO STRESSED ABOUT#WhY IS MY BRAIN LIKE THIS!!!! I DONT KNOW!!!#sorry this is prolly the longest tags ive ever put on a post sorry to whoever opened the see more for this#its just. i think tj3 first tim3 ive been able.to expresw the circles my brain does and its kind of therapeutic#maybe i should start writing these circles down more often so i could see how dumb they rly are on paper#instead.of fretting inside my heae
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she was a diver, she was a diva, can i make it any more obvious
#karinai nation get ur food#it’s vague comfort comic time#vague mainly cuz these were impulsive and i didn’t actually plan on posting them at first#but I don’t see a reason why not#diverxdiva#karin asaka#ai miyashita#karinxai#love live#nijigasaki#nijigaku#my art or something#love live comic i guess#is there even a ll community here hi guys pls come out of the shadows where are you#im not brave enough for twitter#i know i have followers who like it ofc but finding posts is a lot harder??#i follow a bunch of tags and still don’t see it much yk?? Weird#OH yeah the pencil stuff is from like idk April or something#actually idk when i drew the comic in pencil but the other one was
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slow dancing in the dark
#duality smp#dualitysmp#sparkbox#hey you ever think about dying#hey guys I’m normal about my silly minecraft character#they are so special to me#gayliens#minecraft#god i love minecraft roleplay#meg art#so basically spark gazing lovingly at jukebox amd seeing them for who they are or at least who they pretend to be and jukebox#feeling her embrace eyes closed and not seeing spark. is kinda ….#hey u ever make yuri so tragic#YOU LOOKED AT ME LIKE I WAS SOMEONE EEEELSEEEE OH WELLLL CANT YOU SEEEEE#I DONT WANNA SLOW DANCE IN THE DARK#u have no clue u have no fucking clue my plans for these gay little freaks#anyways if ur new here look up Megan Shumway vods on YouTube or whatever#who give a shit#me when baby though I’ve. closed my eyes I know who you pretend I am#me when. me when sometimes I look in her eyes and that’s where I find a glimpse of us. WHAT EVER DUDE#WHAT EVER I DONT EVEN CAAAARE#anyways anyone in these tags like yuri#it’s midnight and I’m drafting this up on my iPad#i have work tomorrow but who give a shit#Drew this in procreate btw I just started using it#this was before elias sent me all his cool tasty brushes though so expect even cooler art later thanks 2 Jim#fuck I don’t wanna delete the last tag and retype and I’m on ipad. *him#ok bye
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Hello may I interest you all in literally the roughest comic sketch I have ever made in my life
Yuko has very thoroughly burrowed herself into my brain so I wanted to quickly sketch my idea for her and Kiryu meeting after TEN YEARS IN THE-
#smol makes art#Yuko Lives AU#yuko nishikiyama#kiryu kazuma#im SORRY Kiryu looks so BAD i dont ever draw him and i dont know HOW to draw these characters hkhhjbkbkj yall see my vision tho right?#this happened purely because i like the idea of Yuko ALSO hitting us with a 'ten years in the joint' i find it particularly amusing#i love her so much you guys and im just spinning her and Nishiki in my brain and trying to think up what they got up to for those ten years#this is fun i dont usually get invested in fandoms and much less AUs!!! im fuckin writing for this thing!!!#if the writers arent gonna give her character then i'll do it my damn self hjkgvgkvh#(also idk if u can tell but i like the idea of her and Nishiki looking VERY similar which is an extra like 'bro how tf dont u recognise me?'#ya get me? but tbh i relate to Kiryu if u change ur haircut im not gonna know who u are even without 10 years in prison hbvhjbbkbhj)#anyway yeah. sorry he looks particularly bad but hey i think the composition's decent? maybe i'll make this properly. someday#better yet someone else do it ivhigkvjgvkhgvgyk
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also this is . such a weird take but i find that i usually care way more about my friends’ ocs that have no connection to me whatsoever than any of our shared characters but literally no one shares the sentiment😿😿 AND I UNDERSTAND WHY. but i just cant.
#like NO i dont wanna ship our ocs together… tell me about your glorbos ill be ur fandom pookie…#i dont need to be included to enjoy ppls art idk…#i do like making like.. fan characters for my friends stories#i just enjoy interacting with ppls art as like.. their friend… and getting to see all the thoughts that go into a personal project#feels more personal to me than doing something together?#like thank you for letting me get to know YOU#or mayb im just weeird#i dont know i think theres something very nice about someone caring about your art!!!!#even if it doesnt include them or benefit them somehow?!??#which it DOES benefit me in the way that i LOVE hearing about ppls ocs#ITS FUN#PEOPLE ARE SO INTERESTING#i love artists.. i love art…#i love people who make art and i love their art
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I really wish blocking someone meant their stuff wouldn’t wind up on your dash at all. Like I understand why it doesn’t, but. still.
Actually, I just need to get better abt checking source urls before I reblog. I try to be mindful, but now and again I Forget and have only myself to blame lmao
#text post#I would love to reblog their art and be supportive in that way at least but tbh#every time I accidentally reblog it I remember checking out their blog and seeing how they talked abt fans that like Izzy and the izcourse#and it's like oh no that's right you hate ppl like me and ur art might be gorg but maybe we just shouldn't interact#they do their thing and I'll be over here doing mine#what really needs to happen is I need to remember to check urls on fandom art to make sure it isn't any of the folks I had to block lmao#but sometimes I get excited bc the art is genuinely lovely and i do like it and think the person is v talented!#and then i forget to check and it's only after scrolling my dash that i see my reblog and the url and go 'oh. fuck. that's right. damnit.'#it's a weird feeling to be like yes I want this person to have fun and make gorgeous art but also it seems#they've made it p clear how they feel abt folks like me and so maybe they would prefer i just fuck off#which i tried to do by blocking!! and yet. here we are#i delete the reblogs whenever this happens so they don't have me in their notes but#i do hope they know their art is lovely and I appreciate their hard work even if we wouldn't otherwise get along with each other#idek why I'm blogging abt this I guess bc I feel like usually it's either or online? like u either hate each other or u don't#but I don't hate the folks who sent shit to me or the folks who condoned it i just wish i had found a way to get along with them instead#as useless a wish as that probably is#and i don't talk abt it a lot but it really bugs the fuck outta me sometimes that we can't just start over and try to interact generally#no messages no trying to be friends just reblog from them if u like and otherwise ignore each other#which has been a thing that's worked fairly okay in other fandoms tho things have happened in others to change how workable it was#but for some reason in this one i feel like im just always walking on eggshells to interact w/anyone bc it feels like everyone is waiting#for someone else to say something they vaguely disagree with and instead of just like. blocking and moving on w/the fandom experience#it turns into a massive mess that even if ur on the fringes of it all you still get pulled into or sent shit and just.#idk it doesn't matter bc ultimately none of this does but dang it the show has been special to me and hits all my special interests#and it's hard to let go and accept that there's no changing how things went and how they are and how this fandom experience for me is often#very fucking lonely even when i'm bursting at the seams to share and to hear from others what they think abt anything and everything w/it#no one is gonna read this tag essay lmao pls scroll on
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youtube
this is not the exact one I watched but I saw one of these "dish scape" things at someone's house who actually has TV (like they pay for dish/cable instead of just watching stuff online) and I think they're meant to be relaxing atmospheric stuff that you mostly ignore, but I sat there for 35 minutes watching absolutely engrossed.. further proof that I genuinely think my brain is incapable of experiencing boredom lol..
#IT'S BECAUSE there's so many little details that like you can spend minutes just scanning every corner of the image and taking it all in and#you keep finding new things! like 'oh I didn't know that blade of grass moved!' or 'I didnt see that bucket before!'. And then on top of#so many details - some things genuinely do change. The one I saw was a Beach house scene and sometimes a bird would fly by or ONE TIME kite#came out of nowhere. a sandcastle built and unbuilt itself. there's a firepit and it comes on when the sky changes from day to afternoon!!#this is like watching a sports game to me. I need weird detail oriented friends who will sit for 20 minutes staring at a barely moving pict#ure & cheer and clap with me when a seagull flies across the screen ghgj.. THERE HE IS!!!! etc!! and there's just so much to think about!!#Like how the images are layered or animated and the choices that were made (like I think the sunrise and sunset sky background images for t#e beachouse are just the same picture flipped and recolored) and trying to predict what's going to happen next (will the lights in the hous#turn off for night time? will another bird show up??) etc! I even got up at one point to walk close to the screen and get a better view of#hese paintings that were visible through the beachhouse windows. and then thinking about building a similar home in the sims! OR ALSO THIS#WOULD BE SUCH A COOL medium I think to tell a story! Like you upload a video to youtube that is framed just as a completely average moving#screensaver ambiance type of thing. It's like 7 hours long and mostly loops the same still image. However. over time at certain points you#can see some thing happen like watching characters interact through the windows. animals or people walk across the screen. certain elements#in the environment morph or change. etc. In such a way that an entire like plot is conveyed. maybe like fantasy mystery sort of thing. I WI#SH I could do this style of art / had friends who could or had money to pay somebody to. I would LOVE to collaborate on a weird surreal#It's Just Your Average Slowly Looping Moving Screensaver Video I Promise' type story.. jjhhgHH.. Or even just making one of these set in so#me of my fantasy world environments. not as a secret thing with easter eggs that tell a story but just literally an image like this tha#moves over time and etc. HHRRGRGHhhhhGG.. ANYWay!! I had to actually turn it off not because I was bored but because it was distracting me#. which is funny since again. I think for most people it's meant to be a 'just leave it on in the background' type of thing that's bland an#neutral . But it was just making me think too much ghjgh.. This is why I can't go to amusement parks or nightclubs bars or concerts like..#a moving screensaver image is too overstimulating to my brain. Could you imagine me going to an environment just full of sensory informatio#like loud noises poeple talking flashing lights etc. etc. ? hghghb... Visiting a grocery store at a slightly busy hour is like my upper lim#it... Anyway.. everything is just so interesting to me. Even if I was locked in a room alone I would have plenty to think about & amu#se myself. I am also a hater definitely like I'm a very analytical person who is critical of society and systems & everything that exists#and even generally am just very opionated and have distinct preferences - so just because everything is INTERESTING does not mean I LIKE or#enjoy everything or never get tired of/annoyed by situations or ideas or etc. But it's more just like.. I literally dont think I could ever#be bored because of the way my brain works and also I approach life with elements of childlike whimsy and constant obsessive curiosity and#attention to detail. so as much as I am an analytical bore I also love everything and the world is fascinating at all times. lol.. duality#of man. if you get it then you get it. ANYWAY.. wanted to ramble abt it. I don't like the above video as much as the one I actually saw but#I couldn't find the beach one online.. BUt.. aaHH! best viewed whilst talking to yourself narrating/cheering! ALSO I want to make one!!!
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#bitter feelings abt content and community again#i don't create for other ppl i do it bc i like to make things#but when youve been making things for a quiet community for a while and getting ehh traction#and ur okay w that bc youve built ur own community elsewhere.. and theres still ppl who enjoy ur stuff here#but idk seeing a whole community appear and interact with each other while uve been there the whole time. n they dont rlly interact w u#is kinda isolating?#for a moment i just stop and go 'what do i do at this for'#not making the art but bothering to post it and tag it as if ppl will see and talk abt a show i love with me#but no one answers back. and suddenly theres a conversation without you about the same topic#i know no one is obligated to give time and effort for content they didnt even ask for#im just writing my feelings#ha if i catered to a certain character more i wonder if ppl wouldve interacted more
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Dangit big money friend I know which blog is yours I just can’t find it or remember the url n can’t find you in the DMS I kNOW I’ve talked to you (adhd memory fog promise I got that big respect)—- but I can’t say Paypal names allowed in fear of deadnames. YOU COME GET ART FROM ME POSTHASTE. hell I’ll make physical art and MAIL IT TO YOU. Your generosity knows no bounds and I hope to share the love with the energy it provides me to SURVIVE.
Note to self: I should make an art piece about the Wealth of Having Community.
#me.#(you essentially just replaced my uncle for the month which is. so comforting.#(for me and for him#(letting him know I’m taking care of#(feels like it’s always been a fear of people who take care of me that I can’t— FIND HELP—- i prommy to them I’ll try my hardest#(either by loving a strong community or by making due by little art pieces#(I grew up homeless I struggle to even see ‘trouble’ as trouble sometimes#(I get in the red I do panic#(but not eating not buying anything not doing anything that’s not free—- that’s my childhood#(I can SURVIVE IT#(but bank red scares me cause it’s Persistent and always appears when you’re least able to attend it (ie: no money?? lETS CHARGE YOU MORE!!#(sniff#(Good people get mentioned to my church lady friend#(she’s. nice. but she has the Christian values of ‘if ur good- good things will happen’ ie: YOU NEED TO EAARRNNN GOODNESS#(usually by working hard#(but lookit this. I do work. I don’t kill my self over it tho. and I spend the rest of my energy on people I care about#(if I had money I’d always be giving it away lord knows I did in college oof#(could’ve saved more if I didn’t help all my friends w their problems but#(that’s how the rich get rich. they in it for themselves.#(*I am rich in relations* so hrmPh#(**rambles further** also spoke to my friends about how the suburbs are subpar communities cause u can’t run businesses in em#(no churches no stores no repairs. cause you can kick someone out of a house but not out of their BUSINESS LOCATION.#(but also cause it risks creating a community you can’t control. becomes self sufficient. doesn’t require capitalism selling them shit.#(when they can share trade and gift. ugh. beautiful times.
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