#if u want something from someone else tho lmk ;;

[lonehearts-a]

oz, without much ceremony, drops down across from benny, expression twisted into something vaguely annoyed and tired. before they can ask, he heaves out a sigh, fidgeting a little. "some guy tried to fight me at work because his frozen margarita was cold. i don't even know. regular ones aren't even hot. please tell me your day was better than mine." / @entityforged liked for a starter. oz to benny.

[niningtori]

for the hope of it all | part one

part two

pairing(s): choi beomgyu x you, choi soobin x you

summary: you've been in love with beomgyu since the first time you saw him, but he sees you as nothing more than a good friend and faithful wingwoman. when he asks you to help him catch another girl, who just so happens to be one of your closest friends, things get complicated.

genre: ANGST, melodrama, romance, smut (mdni)

warnings: super rushed to meet a deadline, not proofread, smut (mdni), beomgyu is a fucking asshole, manipulative!gyu, unprotected sex, creampie, fingering (vaginal), dirty talk, praise, if i missed anything lmk!

word count: 7.2k

notes: whew... i couldn't just post a fic based on a song called AUGUST after august ends (even tho there's only a few minutes left where i am idccc) anyway this isn't the best thing in the world but i still ask that u all don't be mean to me <3 feedback is appreciated n loved as well :)

beomgyu really likes her — like, really— and who can blame him? you certainly can’t. chaewon is a lovely, lovely girl, so it should come as no surprise when beomgyu asks you to, in his words, help him bag her. you’re not one with a particularly strong character at the best of times, so when he practically begs you to convince one of your closest friends that he’s actually not the heartbreaking manwhore he definitely is, you can’t find it in yourself to say no.

it doesn't help that he has enough charisma to charm even the most indifferent target he sets his eyes on, it doesn't help that he's so handsome it makes everyone either want him or want to be him, and it most certainly doesn't help that you've been in love with the boy for the entire time that you've known him. him asking absolutely anything of you would result in you relenting, so when he asks for something as seemingly inconsequential as setting him up with a mutual friend, accepting it is a matter of course. does it hurt your heart to see him pining after someone else when you basically consider him as your soulmate? of course. but his happiness means more to you than your own. if she makes him happy, then so be it.

that's what you tell yourself, at least.

-

beomgyu doesn’t know that you love him — he can’t possibly know — or else he’d treat you differently, right? you don’t want that. you don’t want anything to change, at least not in the disastrous way you anticipate confessing your love to him would go, so you’ve kept your feelings close to your chest to keep him from suspecting anything. you think you’ve gotten pretty good at concealing your feelings. for example, you laugh when he tells you about his sexual escapades, and you don’t hesitate to give him advice on how to woo the girls who are wary of his lasciviousness. you only want to show him the good parts of you, carefully tucking any ugly seeds of jealousy or sadness away from his prying eyes.

the thing is, though, beomgyu is not stupid; and to your never-ending misery, you are not the greatest actress. he can see the crestfallen look on your face for the split second before you can contort your features into a smile. he can hear the tremble in your voice as you force out a laugh. with his godforsaken intuition, he can sense the hesitation in your movement when you playfully push him aside as he over-dramatically recounts his latest raunchy fuck. 

all of this has no discernible consequence, though. if anything, your feelings have been his faithful friend and ally when it comes to conspiring with you to land whatever girl piques his interest at the moment. you may not be a prospective partner, but you are a great wingwoman, he’ll give you that much. and that’s exactly what he needs when dealing with chaewon, who has proven to be a particularly tough nut to crack. he doesn’t usually go for people he would consider friends, if only because he doesn’t like dealing with the messy aftermath, but her refusal to look his way is just too entertaining. he has no earthly idea why this cat and mouse game intrigues him the way it does, but he’s hooked like none other, especially because her reasons for pulling away when she’s definitely as attracted to him as he is to her are unclear. maybe she just doesn’t want to seem easy? whatever it is, he likes it. he likes her.

-

“so what's the plan?” soobin asks. 

“what do you mean?” you blink as you turn towards him, effectively taken out of your daze. you've been staring at a new instagram picture of beomgyu for at least ten minutes now. there's not much going on in it — it's just a candid taehyun took of him — but you can't stop the yearning you feel in your heart as you wish you had been the one to take it, instead.

“i mean, what's your big plan to ‘help’ him this time?” there’s a trace of resentment in his tone as he puts air quotes around “help”. you know he thinks you're just wasting your time on a boy who will never feel the same way you do, but what can you do? you still love him.

“i’m… i’m just going to talk him up to chae, no big deal,” you say rather unconvincingly, because it is a big deal. it’s the biggest deal in the world to you.

“and what are you gonna say? ‘hey, i know you know beomgyu is garbage, but deep down, he’s actually not garbage even though, even deeper down, he really is?’” his words are sarcastic and, for lack of a better term, downright hateful. 

“he’s not garbage, binnie,” you chastise. “he’s actually really sweet once you get to know him.”

“sweet? sweet how, exactly?” he sneers. you just sigh and shake your head. beomgyu is a frequent point of contention in your friendship with soobin, but you don’t know how to overcome it. mostly, arguments surrounding him devolve into conversations like the one you’re having right now. 

“he puts on a tough act, but he’s not really like that on the inside,” you insist. “you just don’t know him like i do.”

“and thank god for that,” he snorts, and you frown. you can tell he feels guilty by the way his expression immediately softens. 

“hey, i’m sorry,” he says, tucking your hair behind your ear. “i just don’t like to see you hurting.”

“i’m not hurting,” you lie. “i’m totally fine. it’s just… i just want to see him happy.” you actually do mean that last part. beomgyu, though seemingly carefree, is actually a lot more insecure and sensitive than one might think. you know this because he’s shown you that side of him many, many times, which must mean that he trusts you like no one else. you are honored to be the one he feels comfortable with, and even if it never amounts to anything more than that, you’re thankful you get to see how he really is. 

“and you think being with a new girl every week will make him happy?” he softly asks, no edge to his voice, but his words hurt even more than they did before.

“it's different this time, binnie. i'm serious. i've never seen him like this before. i think he really likes her.” and the words almost kill you to say, but you mean them, anyway. 

“okay,” he relents. “just do what you want to do. i’ll be there for you no matter what.” 

“thank you,” you reply with a small smile, before putting your nose back into your phone and staring at beomgyu’s pictures again. you don’t catch it, but soobin sighs as he watches you. 

-

you’ve been trying really, really hard. usually, all you have to do is talk about good points about beomgyu, and women fall for it hook, line, and sinker. chaewon is not most women, though, and she makes that abundantly clear with the polite smiles and airy laughs she gives you when you try to bring up beomgyu. 

you don't get it. if you had beomgyu’s attention, you’d never let it go, so it makes no sense to you how someone could have it without taking the opportunity to seize it. if it were you, you’d seize it. if it were you, you'd tell him you’ve loved him since the first time you saw him. if it were you — well, it doesn't really matter, does it? because it isn't you. still, you can’t help but dream.

the sentiment that it will never be you becomes clearer and clearer as you watch beomgyu try to initiate conversation with chaewon at his very own house party you are currently attending. you watch from the sidelines as they sit uncomfortably close together, legs flush against one another, as beomgyu wraps his arm around her shoulder and pulls her in to whisper in her ear. you like to think you’re content with him being with her even if it means you’ll be without him, but it’s difficult to feel that way when you actually see it playing out before you. your heart feels like stone weighing heavily in your chest as she giggles at whatever he says, and you think that things might start looking up for him before her smile suddenly melts into a little frown. 

without warning, she pries his arm off of her and gives him a perfunctory smile before standing up and smoothing out her skirt. then, she grabs her drink from the coffee table and he's left alone. his previously delighted expression is now filled with irritation and disappointment. you're still staring at him, just trying to get a read on the situation as you're left reeling, and before you know it, he's looking up at you. you're a little embarrassed at being caught, but you realize you can play your intrigue off as objectively analyzing the situation in order to help him better. surely he’ll fall for that, right? every time you say something similar, he buys it with no further questions.

he makes eye contact with you then nods towards his room as a silent plea to talk to him in private. if someone were to ask you how you’re able to deduce all of that from one look alone, you’d probably say it’s because you know beomgyu like the back of your hand — and maybe you do, but it’s like a subconsciously trained reaction more than anything. just as you know what beomgyu will do next, he knows you’ll understand his seemingly innocuous gestures. 

you head up the stairs and beomgyu shuts his bedroom door behind you. you prepare to launch into your readymade explanation as to why you were rubbernecking earlier, but he speaks before you can say anything at all.

“why isn’t it working?” he huffs. “did you talk to her like i asked you to?”

“yes, of course i did!” you eagerly insist. you would never lie to beomgyu — well, not about this, at least. your secret feelings are another story. 

“then why does she keep rejecting me?” he huffs. you wish you could answer him. truly, you do. you scramble for the right words, but you sincerely can't wrap your head around her logic, or lack thereof. 

he’s still waiting for an answer, though, so you think back to the recent conversations you’ve had with soobin, and you realize there’s only one plausible conclusion. 

“she just doesn’t know you enough, beoms. if she knew how you really are and how much you like her, she wouldn't act this way; but honestly, she probably thinks you’re just messing with her,” you explain, and you hope beyond hope that he doesn’t take it the wrong way. you don’t want to hurt his feelings by suggesting that his (newly) former playboy ways could be ruining his chances with her.

beomgyu’s feelings, of course, are not hurt. in fact, he just feels more annoyed than anything else. it’s really fucking irritating how he can’t seem to get a read on her or her intentions. she likes him, he can definitely tell, so what’s the problem with him having a messy past? it’s clear that it doesn’t bother you. well, it does, but in a different way. you’d forgive his previous transgressions in a heartbeat if it meant that he’d look your way, so why can’t she be the same? but then, he supposes that comparing someone as lovesick as you are to a normal girl is a bit unfair. 

but why are you so lovesick? it’s obvious that he’s handsome and funny, so falling for him is only natural, but your devotion is on another level. not only that, but you’re devoted in spite of the fact that he clearly wants nothing to do with you. in all honesty, it’s almost like you love him even more when you see him chasing after somebody else... then suddenly, the solution is clear. he has to make her think he doesn’t want her; and the easiest way to do that is to pretend he’s interested in someone else. in the same vein, who better else to pretend with than one of chaewon’s closest friends? you’re absolutely perfect for the job.

beomgyu’s demeanor goes from irritated to self-satisfied, and it puzzles you to no end. maybe he figured out a way to show his true feelings for her? but then why is he looking at you with such intensity? he’s never looked at you this way in the many years that you’ve known him. wait, did he realize something?  please, god, don’t let that be the case. you really don’t think you can —

and your train of thought is stopped when beomgyu strides over to you and locks the door behind you. you look up at him with confusion in your eyes before you finally register what that intense gaze of his really is: predatory.

suddenly, his lips are on yours and you’re holding back a squeal. your eyes widen as he cups his big hands around your cheeks and pulls you in even closer. he tastes like alcohol, which is to be expected, but there's a certain uniqueness to his taste that you can't really put into words; and you’re able to taste it even more as his tongue enters your mouth. you groan at the action, and surprisingly, he does, too. 

you always assumed kissing beomgyu would make you feel like everything was finally right in the world, and it does — it really, sincerely does — but there’s also a certain spark you were not anticipating. something a lot more fiery, and it shoots straight to your core as your tongues tangle together lasciviously. beomgyu seems to know this, and he smirks into the kiss before trailing his warm mouth down your neck. you gasp at the sensation, which just makes him laugh. 

his hands have traveled from your cheeks to your chest, one staying there to grab at your tits while the other one carelessly finds its way up your skirt. 

“so wet,” he whispers in awe when he rubs his fingers against your soaked panties. “is this all because of me?” you feel your cheeks warm and you’re stammering out your next words.

“w-well, i —” 

“is this all because of me?” he repeats, and you give him a feeble nod before covering your face in shame.

“cute,” he snickers, and your previously warm cheeks are now scorching to the touch. 

he moves your panties to the side and rubs against your sensitive clit, which sends pulsations through your entire body, but that’s nothing in comparison to how you feel when he presses a finger into your dripping hole. 

“you’re so tight,” he whispers, lust clearly written all over his face at the prospect of being in your pussy relatively soon; but he wants to enjoy this, he wants to enjoy the way your face screws up as he presses his finger so deep, he’s hitting places previously untouched. he slowly pulls it out, grazing your most sensitive spot with ease before adding another digit in, making you almost groan from the stretch. you bite your lip to avoid making such a sound, but beomgyu pays your attempted discretion no mind as he starts to hammer his fingers into you at a brutal pace. 

it doesn’t take long for you to come undone around his skilled fingers, and once you’re done pulsating around him, he takes them out for a taste. 

“so good,” he remarks, and though your breathing is heavy and your eyes are hazy, you still have it in you to feel embarrassed. he takes your smaller hand in his and leads you to his messy bed, carelessly sweeping every loose item — a t-shirt here, an old cd there — off of it in one go. he lays you down and hungrily licks his lips once he strips you down until you’re fully unclothed. 

you’re feeling extremely small in this moment. you know beomgyu has had his pick of the litter when it comes to women, so you can’t help but wonder how you fare in comparison to the literal bombshells he’s been known to take home. mostly, though, you wonder how you compare to chaewon, as awful as that sounds. if you really think about it, there’s no comparison to be made, really. she’s her, and you’re you. what else is there to say, honestly? still, you’re comforted by the thought that you are the one underneath him right now, not her, and he does not seem disappointed in the slightest if the tent in his jeans means anything at all.

before you can think too much about it, he’s practically tearing his shirt off and you can’t help but stare. his torso is lean and a little paler than the rest of him, probably due to the lack of sun. objectively speaking, he’s no greek god or anything similar, but to you, he’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. if he notices your awed reaction, he doesn’t say anything or really care, because he is simply too busy studying how perfect you seem to look under his dimmed lights. again, he is delighted at the prospect of being inside of you very soon.

he unzips his jeans and slides them, along with his boxers, off of his slim thighs and you can finally see him completely. his cock is a red so deep it’s nearly purple, with evidence of his lust leaking out of its flared tip. you’ve heard a lot about beomgyu’s physique from stories, his and his hookups’ alike, but nothing prepared you for the real thing. you’re not a virgin or anything, but you’re still unsure of how you’re meant to fit him inside of you. and you have no idea how you’re supposed to approach the subject. 

beomgyu does not seem to understand your internal battle, though, because he wastes no time in lining himself up with your entrance. before he pushes in, though, he drags his cock along your soaking wet seam just to coat himself in your slick. when he feels he can’t take any more of his own teasing, he begins to push in.

“j-jesus christ!” he exclaims as he tries to push his tip through your entrance. “are you a virgin or some shit?”

“nngh — n-no! i-i’m not. i’ve — mmh — i’ve had boyfriends before,” you say as best as you can while dealing with the feeling of him literally fucking you open. you’re worried he’s not enjoying himself in light of his outburst and his decidedly strained expression. 

“god, s-so tight,” he drawls. “feels so goddamn good.” he draws his hips back before pushing in again, further this time, and his words of praise seem to comfort you somehow, because he’s able to sheathe himself completely in you. 

he groans when he feels your gummy walls wildly contracting around him — unsure of what to do with the pleasurable intrusion and working tirelessly to simultaneously push him out and pull him in. you, on the other hand, feel nothing but full. you’re so full you ache, so after a few moments of adjusting, your watery eyes are filled with an insatiable sense of pleading. 

“you okay?” he asks, actually somewhat sweetly.

“y-yes — ah — i just feel w-weird,” you say. “feel so — fuck — full.” your seemingly innocent words drive him to the brink of insanity, so with reddened eyes, he grabs your hips so hard, you know he’ll leave marks in his wake, and without warning he begins drilling into you.

his thrusts are not calculated or intentional in any sense — they’re rough and fast and show his desperation. why he’s so desperate, he has no idea. beomgyu is sleazy even on a good day, so women come a dime a dozen, but he feels an unquenchable need he feels will only be satisfied if he continues to fuck you like a man gone mad. so he does.

your breasts bounce with every thrust and while he wants to grab one, his thirst only makes him want to go even deeper in you, so he employs his hands to manhandling you into a mating press. the new position has him going even deeper, and you can feel him hitting your cervix with each nasty snap of his hips. tears at the sheer feeling of being overwhelmed spring in your eyes and you have to clamp your hand over your lips to keep from crying out.

“let me hear you,” he pleads while gently moving your hand from your mouth and not-so-gently fucking you like a breeding whore, and he’s not sure if he’s saying it because he wants to make sure chaewon hears or just because he desperately wants to hear you for himself. 

“fuck!” you exclaim, tears flowing freely down your cheeks. “s-so big!”

“oh, sweetheart,” he rambles, “who were you fucking before? they didn’t deserve this tight little pussy. they didn’t fuck you like you deserve to be fucked — like a good little whore.” 

“‘m n-not a whore,” you tearily insist, somehow convinced that he means his words. you’re not completely inexperienced, but you’re not a whore, right?

but your innocence only makes him wanna ruin you more, claim you completely. 

“you’re taking cock so well, but you wanna tell me you’re not a whore?” he snickers meanly, and you feel so delirious, you find yourself agreeing with what he says. 

the lewd sounds of skin meeting skin and the sharp knocking of the headboard fill the room, and the heat you feel building up inside of you has you seeing stars. beomgyu pulls you in for a sloppy, wet kiss as he finally lets one of your legs down in order to snake his hand against your clit, which he languidly rolls in the midst of his pistoning in and out of you. 

“are you gonna come for me?” he asks as his lips part from yours. “are you gonna come all over my cock?” 

“y-yes, please,” you sob. “wanna come!”

“then do it, baby. let go for me,” and with the way he’s rolling your clit while fucking into you, you can’t help but comply.

he hisses when he feels you contracting around him, tightening up even more than before and pulling him in impossibly deeper. that’s all it takes, really, before he comes undone himself and sprays his thick, hot load into your spasming pussy. 

he collapses on top of you, and both of you take a few moments just to catch your breath before he pulls out of you with a wince. he’s absolutely enthralled by the way the mix of both of you two’s cum leaks out of you as soon as he does so. he’s almost tempted to swirl it back in and plug you up, but his rational side stops him before he can do anything he’ll regret. 

“are you on the pill?” he asks, and you nod.

“good, go ahead and get a plan b, too. just in case,” he says with a quick kiss to your forehead, and you nod with a delirious smile even in spite of his pedantic words. you’re just so happy you got to sleep with him, be closer to him.

“oh, i almost forgot to actually tell you,” he laughs. “i think fucking you will make chaewon jealous. i think we put on a pretty good show tonight, don’t you?” 

and your heart and your hope and your dignity shatter like nothing else. 

“y-yeah,” you try to reply with a laugh, but it sounds more forced than anything else you’ve ever heard in your life. “it was a really good show.”

-

“you slept with him?!” soobin asks, and he seems beyond frustrated. if you had the guts to look him in his eyes, though, you’d notice just how much hurt is in them. 

“y-yeah…” you mumble, face downcast.

“why? why would you do that? you’re just going to be even more hurt!” he exclaims, and you shrink into yourself even more, not out of fear, but out of pure shame. 

“i don’t know! it all just happened so fast, a-and i, i don’t know, i just couldn’t stop myself,” is all you manage to say. soobin groans at your words. 

“you do realize that getting over him is going to be even harder for you now, right?” he asks, and you finally look up at him for a second before looking back down and nodding, and it’s almost like you’re a child who got caught doing something they knew was wrong.

“i know, and i’m sorry,” you mutter, still struggling to make eye contact, but soobin catches your timidity and his gaze is softened as he pulls your face up to look at him. 

“you don’t have to apologize to me,” he sighs. “i’m just worried about you, you know?” 

“i know, i know. but i’m still really sorry.” and you don’t have to elaborate on why that is because you both know that he’ll be the one helping you pick up the pieces when this situation inevitably breaks your heart even more than it’s already broken, if that’s even possible.

“it’s alright,” he says, pulling you in for a hug that’s so warm and kind you almost burst into tears. “you’ll be alright. i’m here.” 

-

this is a bad idea. soobin would yell at you if you told him what you’re up to, but you don’t want to think about that right now. all you want to think about is how much better you’ll feel after you get your secret feelings off of your chest. up until now, the fear of rejection has made you too afraid to tell beomgyu how you really feel, but things can’t get much worse than they are at present, can they? it’s only been a few days since your hookup with beomgyu, but your love is eating you alive and you doubt that you’ll be able to hold it in for much longer.

things will probably go badly, and he’ll probably be completely blindsided, but the thought of continuing to lie to beomgyu’s face hurts more than anything else ever could. even more than the pain you feel every day that he unconsciously hurts your feelings. maybe this will ruin your friendship, but you love beomgyu, and he loves you, even if it’s not in the way that you want. all you can do is hope that your friendship is strong enough to overcome this.

with that mindset, you find yourself at his doorstep on this particularly cool summer night. you know he’s home because you can hear the faint sounds of whatever movie he’s watching emanating from his door. before you can lose your nerve, you begin to rapidly knock. before long, you hear the shuffling of feet nearing you, and you almost bolt then and there, but he’s quick to open the door when he realizes it’s just you.

“what are you doing here?” he asks, agitation apparent. oh god, were you interrupting something? what if he was working? what if he was sleeping? you should've texted before just showing up unannounced. 

“i-i’m sorry, are you busy?” you ask sheepishly.

“... no,” he says after a slight pause, and he opens the door to let you in. you sit yourself on his couch, posture ramrod straight due to how fucking uncomfortable you are, and you try to steady your breathing as you fiddle with your fingers. 

“is this about chaewon?” he asks, breaking the silence, and your heart aches at the trace of hope in his words.

“n-no, nothing like that. i just —”

“is there any update on that?” he cuts in before you can even get your words out.

“oh, um, not really,” you reply before remembering that something has happened, but you’ve been so out of it, it genuinely didn't occur to you to tell him. “wait, actually, she mentioned that you seem different lately, but she, uh, she’s still… well, to be honest, she’s —” 

“what? she’s still what?” and there’s no patience for your rambling to be seen.

“she’s still not interested in dating you,” you mumble, unable to look him in the eyes when you say it. he’s completely silent after your words, and when you do finally gather enough guts to actually look at him, you really, really wish you had just kept your face down. because he’s pissed. 

“are you fucking with me? she really said that?” he asks, and you nod. 

“why didn’t you tell me earlier?!” and you feel so disoriented at the way things are unfolding that you can barely croak out a reply.

“i-i forgot.” 

“you forgot? jesus christ, if it’s not about her, then why are you here?” he seems angrier than you’ve ever seen him, but his words get you to finally remember what you’re here for.

“i just… i needed to talk to you,” you say pleadingly, looking into his eyes as you try your hardest to give yourself the strength to be honest with him.

“about?” 

it takes all of the courage in your poor little heart to choke out your next words. 

“beomgyu, you know, for the longest time, i’ve —”

“i know,” he impatiently snaps. you’re unsure of what he’s referencing, but you do know he has no idea about the feelings you’ve kept hidden for so long. 

“no. no, you don’t know, actually,” you argue, brave face on, but voice shakier than a leaf. “i just need to tell you that i —”

“that you love me? i know, that’s what i just fucking said,” he sighs irritatedly. “why else would you help me? ‘cause you love me so much, right?” he knows it’s wrong to take his frustration out on you, but you’re so pathetic, you make it too damn easy. you’re the perfect outlet for him to unleash all of his anger.

“you… you knew? this entire time?” you ask incredulously. you feel like you’re suffocating in the face of his callousness and disgust, and the room feels smaller than it did before.

“i mean, yeah. it was kind of obvious,” he muses. your cheeks feel so hot you’re sure you’re on the brink of immolation. it was obvious? if it was obvious, then why did he keep you around in the first place? because you’re useful when it comes to helping him get his dick wet?

“so… so why did you…” you trail off, still finding it inconceivable that the beomgyu you know and love could possibly know about your feelings; and not only are they unreciprocated by him, which you could understand and respect, but they’re nothing more than a fucking joke and means to an end. the end in question being burying himself into other women.

“why did i act like i didn’t know? because i don't feel the same way,” he answers, and you already knew it and knew it well, but that doesn't make it any more digestible to hear.

“y-yeah, but you — how could you still sleep with me? how could you do that to me?” you ask, lips wobbling and voice cracking. you can't believe this. you won't believe this. you have to be misunderstanding something somewhere. there's just no way this is it.

“because it was easy,” he says with a shrug, and your heart shatters into a million pieces. 

because it was easy. 

easy. what a funny word. you don’t think you even fully comprehend what it means in this context, actually. easy, easy, easy, but what part of this has been easy for you? every day, it’s like you’re killing yourself by trying to twist into what he wants you to be. a friend, a confidant, and now, even a lover. but lover is being too generous, isn't it? because he does not love you, not even as a friend, and this discovery becomes clearer and clearer as you think back to every time he’s shown you just how little he cares.

soobin’s litany of warnings come back to haunt you with a vengeance. 

he’s just using you. 

he’s garbage.

he’s just gonna hurt you.

and though you know soobin will take no pleasure in being correct, you can't help but dread the “i told you so” you know he will never be mean enough to say, but will inevitably think.

“i thought we were friends,” you say incredulously, dread and anxiety pooling in the deepest recesses of your heart. “i thought you cared about me” 

and he doesn’t shrug or anything because he doesn’t really need to, but he might as well seeing as how it clearly makes no difference to him. and this is finally how you come to understand that beomgyu is just as bad as everyone says. maybe even a little worse. and he will continue to act like a sociopath for as long as you let him. 

“i-i love you, i really do. but no fucking way. i won’t sit here and let you treat me like shit,” you declare, tears flowing down your cheeks so quickly and steadily you’d probably be unable to wipe them away even if you tried. luckily or unluckily, you don’t even have the strength to find out. 

“you’re going to regret this,” you whisper, and it’s said with such certainty that for a moment, he almost believes you. almost, but not quite.

either way, you’re booking it out of his door before he can even reply.

-

this is everything beomgyu ever could’ve asked for. chaewon is sitting next to him on his bed, eyes dark with lust as she unceremoniously grabs the end of her top and tugs it off. she's beautiful, no doubt about that, but he feels more and more like something is incredibly wrong. 

she leans in to press her lips onto his, but he flinches, scooting almost imperceptibly further away from her on the bed. she falters for a moment before sighing and crawling on all fours to situate herself between his legs. she begins to unzip his pants and tug on his waistband before he frantically stops her.

“w-what are you doing?” he asks, voice shaking.

“blowing you, what does it look like i’m doing?” she replies with a roll of her eyes. “i just wish i had known you wouldn’t be into kissing or, like, actual foreplay, but whatever.” she continues her movement to pull his pants down before he stops her again. 

“what’s wrong?” she asks curiously, before finally realizing that he is, to what would normally be his eternal shame, completely soft. her mouth drops in shock, and in another universe, beomgyu has enough energy to care. but not in this one. in this one, his eyes are teary as he feels an implacable sense of dread he can’t seem to shake off. 

“oh god,” she says with conviction, pulling herself back up and running one hand through her hair. “i knew this would happen.” 

beomgyu, on his part, looks somewhat out of it, but her words bring him back to earth. 

“knew what would happen?” he asks tentatively, sniffling for reasons unknown to him while he tries not to let his tears run over his waterlines.

“i knew you’d act like this because of her,” she says begrudgingly. 

his eyebrows furrow for a second, not because he doesn’t already know who she’s talking about, but because he doesn’t understand the correlation between you and the situation he presently finds himself in.

“think about it,” she says slowly, condescendingly. “who do you trust, like, actually? and i’m not just talking about with getting girls, but with everything.” beomgyu is silent as he tries to comprehend what she's saying, but he’s nothing if not slow on the uptake in regards to human emotion. 

“oh, beomgyu, come the fuck on,” she sighs in frustration. “i mean, when you were stressed about that presentation for your job, who did you call? yunjin told me all about it. she said you spent hours reciting a 15 minute presentation to the girl you supposedly don’t give a fuck about.” ah. he remembers that night, actually, and he remembers it well. he called you in a panic, so you brought over some dinner because you knew he was stressed, but he was so wound up that you didn’t leave and even insisted that he practice with you in order to give him feedback. he spent the whole night repeating the same speech over and over again, but you sat patiently and encouragingly as he repeated the boring, inconsequential drivel to you. you never complained, not even once, and you didn’t ask him for any compensation in the form of him doing something — anything — similar for you, either. even if you had, he realizes, he wouldn't have given any to you, anyway.

“that’s…” 

“and that’s not even all of it. who’s the first one you look for when you walk into a room? and when something good happens, who do you tell first? not anybody else, and i know for a fact that it’s not me, never will be,” she says bitterly. every new point slashes at his heart and ego.

and suddenly, things start making sense, albeit in the worst possible way. beomgyu loves you. his trust and dependence on you all make an awful sort of sense, but in a way, it’s relieving to finally be able to put a name to this feeling. his eyes still feel hot, but not so much because something feels wrong, but because things finally feel right for the first time in forever. he loves you, has loved you, and will continue to love you.

her words resonate with him so deeply, she can read it all over his face. it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that he finally understands, but he’s still missing an important fact. the most important fact, even. 

“yeah, i guess you finally get it now. you have feelings for her. and the worst thing is: you treat her like shit.” his eyes widen and the tears that were just threatening to escape are completely let loose. how could he only come to this realization after he already effectively stomped on your heart and your pure intentions? after you’ve made it clear that you don’t want anything to do with him anymore? and he has nobody but himself to blame, really; he practically shoved you away over and over and over again. 

“i-i didn’t mean to —” 

“sure, of course you didn’t,” she says with a sarcastic smile. “whatever makes you feel better for fucking over the girl who’s been in love with you for years.”

-

beomgyu may not know much about the inner workings of interpersonal relationships, but he does know he needs to see you, and he’s smart enough to understand that he needs to apologize. 

but beomgyu has never apologized for anything in his life — not unless you count the times his mother made him grit them out as a child when he would objectively do something wrong, but this is another matter entirely. nobody will be holding his hand as he does it, and he’s not even really sure where to start. but he knows he has to try.

surely there’s a better place to try than at the bar where he currently finds himself, but then, there’s no time like the present. not to mention that he has a sneaking suspicion that you're avoiding all of your mutual friends’ get-togethers for the sole purpose of avoiding him. if the blocking of all of his socials wasn’t enough, the blocking of his phone number certainly was.

it’s not necessarily fate’s fault that he finds himself here, either. he heard from a friend (chaewon) that you’d be here tonight. he sees you from across the bar looking lively and chatty, and he prays that the good mood you seem to be in will help soften the upcoming conversation with him. to his luck, you step out of the bar to take a call, so he slides from his seat with an open beer bottle in tow, and follows you outside. 

your back is turned, and he doesn’t quite hear what you’re talking about over the phone, but he does catch a giggle and a name, soobin’s, and it makes his heart ache. when you hang up, you turn to head back into the bar, but you’re met with his figure. 

“h-hey,” he says, and he wants to smack himself for the casual greeting he still managed to fuck up.

your eyes widen for a moment before they go blank, and you’re pushing past him without a response. 

“i need to talk to you,” he says, voice trembling as he grabs the back of your elbow, which you snatch out of his grip like his touch is poison. 

“about?” you ask curtly, barely even deigning to turn your head to look at him. you have never been so hostile towards anyone, let alone him, and it's making him spiral. 

“i’m sorry. i’m just really, really sorry,” he desperately apologizes. you’re silent for a few moments as you turn to completely face him with your arms crossed, and he’s trying his damndest to read your expression, but he can’t quite make it out.

“okay… and?” is all you say in response, and he fumbles over his words at your nonchalance. 

“a-and, um, i —”

“you know what?” you cut in with an impatient sigh and a wave of your hand. “i don’t care anymore. you’ve said enough.”

“but i —” 

“i don’t care, beomgyu.” and his name is said in such disgust that it sounds to him like it’s a chore for you to spit out. you’re about to turn and reenter the bar when his next words come tumbling out. 

“i think — i know —  i love you,” he says urgently, and your previously unreadable gaze turns into one of pure, sheer amusement. you’re so amused, you laugh, even. 

“what the fuck are you talking about?” you say between giggles.

“i-i didn’t realize it before, but i talked to chaewon, and she even said that i’ve probably always felt that way about you. i know i didn’t show it, but i really do love —”

“okay, just stop. stop it right there, beomgyu. i’m only going to say it just this once, so listen carefully, okay?” you ask, and he fervently nods. 

“okay. you don't know the first thing about love.” and he goes to interrupt you, but you don’t let him. “loving somebody means you put their feelings above your own. what the hell would you know about that?” 

“i’m… i know i was wrong, b-but i —” 

“beomgyu,” you say exasperatedly. “i’m so glad you’re finally reaching enlightenment, and i’m so happy i was cannon fodder for you to use to get there. but i just really, really don’t care anymore, okay? do what you want with whoever you want, but don’t bother me about it anymore, alright?” and he’s so stunned he can’t even form words, but you just shake your head and prepare to leave again. unconsciously, he goes to grab you again, which you consequently dodge, and he thinks this is the most rejected he’s ever felt before realizing it’s not over yet. it’s only truly over when you grab his bottle from him and splash its contents across his face before throwing the bottle back into his arms and leaving for good.

notes pt. 2: yeah... idk when part two will be out but stay tuned! also, if you all want a soobin ending let me know and i might... MIGHT do it ;_;

permanent taglist: @my313 @superbbananananana @lonelybutterflytae @cherrycolaberry @midwinterblizzard @everythingvirgoes @sooberryworld @20-cms @inkigayocamman @hyueika @boba-beom @vicurious28 @blossommi @lickingan0rchid @katsukis1wife @binniebakery @notevenheretbh1 @shymexican @milkandoranges @that1sadgrl @archoive @paegesoobin @buttercreamerie @ifwtxt @softesyoongi @serenityism00 @fairfootedflekk @kyanmeai

series taglist: @denleave1088 @calssunflower @wildernessuntothemselves @pluslandminun @enhasrii

join one of my taglists here!

[luvv4j4ybe11]

What kink do you think loak, neteyam and jake would have?

I’m pretty sure I included smth about this when I posted the “how he treats you” headcanons, but I’ll write it again anyway js for u nonnie💕

Warnings~ p in v, corruption kink, breeding kink, size kink, Dacryphilla, exhibitionism, blindfold kink, breath play, begging, orgasm control, overstimulation, edging, wax play, masochism, biting kink(we all know who tf this belongs to), somnophilla, tempature play, oral fixation, daddy kink, and I think that’s it. Lmk if I missed anything, and enjoy<3

Dividers by: @anitalenia & @princessantisocial & @animatedglittergraphics-n-more

Lo’ak definitely has a….

Courrption kink, size kink, blindfold kink, scent kink, breeding kink, oral fixation, wax play kink, pain kink(masochism), begging kink, praise kink, daddy kink, biting kink and a breath play kink.

☆ whenever you give him head, he’ll always push you head down on him untill your basically choking on his cock, and then he’ll pull you back up and give you air. He js finds it so cute seeing you all out of breath with tears and drool streaming down your face, but even being exhausted you’re still eagerly trying to get his girthy cock back in your mouth.

“Such a good girl, aren’t you mamas? Don’t know what to do without my cock in your mouth? Hm, that’s what I thought..”

☆ Whenever he has you in mating press(or any position for that matter) he’s always rambling about “how good of a mom” you’d be and how you’d “look so gorgeous stuffed all full of my babies.” It drives you insane(in the best of ways). When he finally does cum inside of you though, the most guttural growl leaves him, effortlessly making your pussy flutter around him from the absolute feral noise that just came out of your handsome mate.

☆ loves to praise and loves being praised, it just makes him feel good knowing how good you make him feel/how good your doing for him/ so on and so forth. When you praise him tho? Expect this mf to be on his knees in a second for you and if you praise him in public too he gets so flustered; his tail will stand straight up and away like crazy, his ears will stand straight up and turn a dark purple along with his cheeks and neck. It’s adorable honestly

✩ has such a huge corruption kink, especially if this is your first relationship with someone else + you’ve never had sex/intimate experiences with anyone else. He’ll always tell you/show you knew things (that are of sexual nature) knowing you’ll get curious and want to try it with him, and then get addicted to how good it feels, not even nothing to do it by yourself because it wasn’t him touching you. He also lovess how sensitive you are, the way your breath hitches and you cling to him whenever he lightly brushes over your nipples with his hand while he kisses you slowly always makes him feral

☆ loves the size difference between you two, and will make it clear too. Saying things like,“look at how well this tiny cunt is taking me, she’s basically drooling all over my cock, mamas,” and sooo much more nasty things that make that pressure in your stomach get more intense, you can’t help but cum all over his dick:(

☆ talking more about this⬆️ tho, if you just do something sublet like placing a hand on his bicep or holding his hand, everything about his demeanor will change; his breathing will grow more shallow, his eyes will get more hooded, and his tail will perk up and start swaying around in a way that alr tells you wtf he’s thinkin about.

☆ has such an oral fixation, like he just loves the feeling of your soft, squishy flesh in his mouth. No matter if it’s your fingers, thighs, tits, or hips, he just loves it. And just to make you squirm he’ll lightly trace his fangs on your skin, wait for your reaction, and then bite tf outta you bc he’s mean like that

☆ loves your smell so much, he’ll come up behind you and hug you firmly while smooshing his face into the crook of your neck, or he’ll just pick you up and burry his head into your chest.

☆ you asked him one time if you wanted to try something new, and ofc he said yes, but he didn’t know it’d end up with him breathless,blindfolded, and completely overstimulated by your relentless strokes on his sensitive cock. But he loved it regardless, and he realized he had a thing for being blindfolded.

☆ the first time he realized he had a daddy kink was when you accidentally let it slip one time when he had you on your hands and knees,pounding into your sore pussy relentlessly as he had you in a headlock to give him more leverage, and as soon as he heard that little “daddy..please don’t stop” slip, he was GONEEEE. He ran with it 100% a cocky grin on his face as he increased his pace to a downright brutal one, egging your fucked out brain on even more by saying, “yeah? I won’t, mama, don’t worry. Daddy’s gonna make this pussy squirt real nice before I fill her up. Want that, sweet girl? Want daddy to cum inside this pretty pussy?…mhm, I figured.”

☆ once you give him the ok, he’ll 100% fuck you while you sleep. Mf doesn’t care if you’re on your period or not, he’ll just fuck your thighs or just fuck you like he always does. He does not care😭

Neteyam definitely has a….

CORRUPTION KINK, exhibitionism, overstimulation kink, orgasm control kink, Dacryphilla, degradation, praise, breeding kink, size kink/difference, overstimulation, edging, somnophilla, and a tempature play kink.

☆ has such a bad corruption kink, especially if you were his bsf before you two started dating, because the second you told him you basically have no clue when it comes to anything sexual and intimate, he was alr plotting to make you his personal slut that was once so innocent.

☆ lowkey a perv on the DL, like mf will let his hands roam all around your body while telling you how soft and pretty you are, knowing that the more he talks, the more sensitive you get.

☆ finds it so cute when you try to fit his cock into your mouth/pussy, even though it’s too big and you aren’t stretched out enough yet, you still try because you wanna be a good girl for him:( he’ll just sit and watch you with the meanest smirk on his face while he guides your actions, saying things like “who would’ve thought such an innocent girl like you could be such a greedy little whore? Even this pretty pussy is trying so hard to swallow me whole, she’s drooling on me,” while you push more of your cunt down onto him as tears of frustration and pain run down your face:((

☆ loves to overstimulate and edge you with your toys, and he’ll say the meanest things to you while he does;( (But of course he’ll always let you know he didn’t really mean it when he cleans you up.) and if you start to cry because of the overstimulation and his words, he won’t care. He’ll stop until he feels you’ve learned your lesson.

“What a pathetic little thing. You could barely hold out for two days without me? Had to go and disobey me because this pussy is just too greedy..what a shame.”

☆ will always stuff you full with his cum after every round, promising to get you full with his babies no matter what

☆ insist on fucking you in public because he catches WAY too many men staring at you in a way he doesn’t like. So he’ll pull you into a clearing that isn’t too far from where everyone else is and fuck you senseless, and he’ll make sure to pin your hands behind your back/above your head so you’re forced to be loud. And once you two are done he’ll make sure none of his cum slips out of you, so you’re forced to walk around with his cum soaking down your loincloth so much it drips down your thighs:(

☆ always throws your weight around like nothing and to him, it is. He’s so much more bigger and stronger than you and it shows;he’s always manhandling you into the positions he wants you in while he uses your small body as a flesh light on his girthy cock.

☆ if you brought up the idea of somnophilla, he’d definitely try it since you suggested it, and phew lawd did he get addicted to the way you would react to him even when you’re sleeping

☆ lovesss tempature play sm, seeing the way your nipples harden and skin gets covered in goosebumps whenever he rubs an ice cub against your skin, and the way you shudder when he slips the ice cube inside of you will never fail to make him crazy

Jake definitely has a…..

Daddy kink, breeding kink, praise kink, overstimulation, orgasm control, size kink/difference, biting kink, Dacryphilla, oral fixation, and impact play

☆ this man has SUCHHHHH a daddy kink, he just loves the way it sounds coming off of your tongue

☆ also loves how paethitc you sound when you beg for him, it almost all the time makes him give into whatever you’re begging him for.

☆ no surprise that this man has a breeding kink too, he just can’t help the image of you all swollen and full with his child plagues his mind whenever he’s deep inside of you, ultimately ending with him cumming deep inside your fertile womb:(

☆loves praising you while he has you in missionary or when you give him head, but even still he loves to praise you. He needs to let his girl how good she’s being for him.

☆ overstimulates and spanks you as punishment, and he’s so cruel about it too, not even bothering to stop after you beg him to because he knows how much you really enjoy it from how much your pussy leaks whenever his hand touches your bruised skin.

☆ will never get over the size difference between you two, it finds it so hot and makes it so obvious that he does. And when he finds out that you also think the size difference between you two is attractive? Lawdy I hope youre ready for your relationship to become alot more touching and teasy (is that a word?). mf will come up behind you and wrap his burly arms around your curves and ask you how you’re doing as if he can’t smell how wet you are from him pressing his strong, big body against your soft, curvy one.

☆ has such a biting/marking kink, it’s bad. No matter what position he has you in he’s sinking his teeth into you, the lapping up whatever blood comes out of it eagerly as he moves over to the next spot he wants to mark.

☆ he always blames it on the fact that you’re too pretty, and that the men in the clan don’t care if you say you’re mated or not. So of course he has to cover you in marks, his scent, and stuff your pussy so full with his cum it soaks your loincloth.

☆ has an oral fixation too, so whenever he eats you out he’s SLOPPYYYY asf wit it, but also slow and sensitive about all of your sweet spots

☆ the first time you cried when he was fucking you he stopped everything and asked if you were ok, but when you told him it was because he feels that good, he almost aims to make you cry every time you guys have sex (and he’s successful in doing so)

A/N~ this took WAY too long oh my fucking god! But it’s done, and I hope you enjoyed it nonnie<3 I hope you guys stay safe and stay hydrated, mwah ilysm

Duces🫶🏽,

luvv4j4ybe11

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(If you’d like to be added to or removed from my general taglist, lmk by commenting under this or DMing me! And if you @ isn’t working, please check your settings💕.)

[evillex11]

“why are you making gojo a tragic character” he is tragic wdym!! even with his silly, unserious persona, we have glimpses of his misery (outside his relationship with geto bc that itself is another layer of tragedy in his character lmao) bc he's often exploited and dehumanized!!

he was born with an extremely rare and powerful feature, six eyes, which immediately puts him into the spotlight since his birth. he was just little when a target was put on his head for various reasons (ex. money, fear, power) so he had to act accordingly in order to protect himself [child gojo scenes]. he was also adored by many but solely for his strength and ability to protect, his capability to shoulder a lot of responsibilities because he was gojo. we can assume that it's instilled to him from the very beginning that he needs to fulfil that duty because what other purpose would heis ability serve? he doesn't particularly like his role either [basketball scene] as that's all what he's been doing, it's all what he's been told, and it's all what he'll continue to do even after his death.

but even with his service, he's still treated like shit. to almost everyone, gojo's identity doesn't go beyond his name, his CT, his six eyes, his ability to lift heavyweights, his almost unmatched strength and intelligence,, he is a tool, an object with a purpose. even with his power, he couldn't bring himself to go against those weaker than him—the very people he protects. he's supposedly above everyone yet it seems like he's under their tight grip. tho can see where they're coming from as the gap between him and everyone else is large, but it's still a heavy responsible to carry,, it's exhausting and it sucks the life outta you

he's so lonely despite being surrounded by people, not just in the sense that his peers don't get along with him because they think he's insufferable, but also in the sense that he has no one to share his burdens with (by splitting the responsibility, talking about it, or understanding him), he can't be his authentic self around anyone, he can't be human around anyone. because if the gojo satoru was worried, exhausted, defeated, that means everyone is doomed! he can't show anything but his silly and unworried personality to protect people around him. the persona he's curated acts like a veil which conceals the fights sorcerers go through to defeat enemies.

to the majority, gojo is not completely a human person, no the depth or nuance, he is simply a strong character. he can't deny the request for help, he can't seek help, he certainly can't rest. who knows what goes on inside his head? who knows what his thoughts are like and how he's affected by all the burden he carries? well, the two people who was near his level knew (geto and yuuta)

he's truly miserable.. and because of how the jujutsu world is, everything would crumble if there wasn't someone that is both powerful and exploitable. I think understanding him is as far as we'll get to making him human

–

thx 4 reading this long ass post I'm totally just so normal abt him... ^^ I just want to see this side of him portrayed more cuz he's human after all and all those burdens are still heavy and crushing,,

and as always, if I misinterpreted something or if u wanna share ur thoughts, feel free to lmk!!!

[miuszn]

Hi ;), how are you? you can make a headcanons of dealer college student Ellie Williams with fem reader, please :)

hi anon !! i rlly rlly love the hcs of college student + dealer!ellie like wow that’s def her .. i have a few hcs so i’m gonna share some of my favs with u !! ( note : i’ve looked for hcs like this before so i might accidentally repeat some that might’ve been posted already !! if that’s the case lmk so i can give credit , it’s never my intention to copy anyone T_T)

dealer!college student!ellie x fem reader hcs

♡ she earns lots of money from it , and i mean like , a lot . ( at least for a college student ) which means she spoils u lots n lots .. whenever ur out w her and u point out something , whether it be a dress or bag or anything else , that u like and think looks super cute , she insists on buying it for u . even tho u tell her every time it isn’t necessary and she doesn’t have to buy u anything , she tells u to not worry and that she does it bc she loves seeing u happy <3

♡ u guys r literal polar opposites . like . super different . everyone was so surprised when u guys said u were dating .. but yk they say opposites attract :)

♡ HATES when u do her makeup but only ever allows it when she’s high .. u take pics of her n show her after n she’s mad embarassed n keeps telling u to delete them but u refuse hehe

♡ gets jealous whenever u smoke without her . especially if it was w someone else . and god forbid she finds out THEY gave u a joint and it wasn’t one of hers .. she likes to say it’s bc u never know what’s other ppl can put in them but truth is , she just takes genuine offense to it

♡ gives u a million discounts .. she likes to call them “ pretty girl discounts “

♡ u loooove tagging along w her when she makes deliveries , but she always makes u stay in the car bc she wants u to be safe

♡ she only ever makes edibles whenever ur baking together bc she can’t bake for shit so she has to rely on u . oops . she can’t even make those brownie mixes u only have to add water and an egg she somehow fucks it up .

♡ when u first started smoking , she insisted u only do it around her so she can watch u and make sure ur safe bc “ people can be dangerous n u never know what can happen “

[vanyafresita]

MUTUALS HEY pspsps mutuals pspspspspsss

it's been a while since i've sent any physical letters to anyone and i kinda miss it... SO, if we're mutuals and don't mind giving me your address, i'd love to send you a physical letter <3

you don't have to send anything back btw ! this is simply something i enjoy doing ^^

[more details under read more]

on the written letter i'll send, i'll talk about a random number of things and maybe gush about the media im most interested at the moment (tho if you know we share a fandom (no matter how old or dead it is, even if im not actively going crazy about it rn) and u wanna hear my thoughts on that specifically, please let me know !!)

_._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._

along with the letter, i'll send too:

a surprise recipe of something sweet or salty that i like (i'll modify the recipe if necessary in case of allergies, diets or ingredients dislikes)

a tea bag (i have quite a bunch of tea flavours, so you can pick one or i'll send a random one !)

a traditional drawing of anything you want ! (yes, anything !)

2 postcards + a few stickers and stamps

a friendship bracelet (lmk 3 colours you like !)

optional: if you want to send a letter back, but you're unsure what to write about in your letter, you can request me a list of questions so you can reply them and go off about anything else ^_^

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extra notes:

i'm currently living in europe, but i'll send stuff worldwide, wherever you are !!

this is completely free ! unless your country has some weird ass laws that make you pay for receiving packets (????), this should cost you nothing at all (if u're forced to pay to get the packet, i'll send u the money !)

along with your address, i'd advise giving me a phone number too (some countries require me to give a phone number, sorry u_u)

you do NOT have to send me anything back !! and if you decide to do it, it does not mean you have to send anything else apart from a letter !

even if we have never talked/interacted directly at all, you're very much welcome to ask for this !!!

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if you're interested, dm me ! we can sort out the details and i'll start right away ! :]

this will be valid until march 31st ! EDIT: closed ! i got more requests for this than expected and i can't really get to more people, so im ending this after one day !! lol i'll try to do this again by the end of the year in case someone missed it !! <3 thanks to those who reached out !

[jinjinxedsoul]

CHAPTER 1. Here's to the mess we made.

WARNINGS: Smut. fingering, p in v, unprotected sex, dub con, incest (uncle-niece), drunk sex lmk if I'm missing anything.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:Listen when I started writting this chapter I started in a different direction and even tho I liked most of it I kept feeling the urge to write more of these two before starting any drama, that's when I did the poll for ask u what did you think about it, and when you agreed I started this. Now I really wanna keep on writing about this two a lil bit prior their family drama starts what do you think? I wanna know your thoughts. I also opened an insta account for my hotd related fics (i already have one for my bts works in spanish so why not?) if you want to go follow me feel free to do so I love interacting w my readers Anyways, enjoy this thing.

Word count: 4K+ (also lmk if you prefer long or short chapters)

Things between them were... complicated. Far too complicated. But within that great mess that was their relationship, there was a connection neither of them was willing to lose, one they had learned to guard jealously from the eyes and gossip of others. They didn't need anyone else to know, because what they had was specifically shaped and created by and for them.

For them to live. To cherish. To understand.

If someone were to ask what had sparked that strange relationship, they would surely blame everything on their exchange semester in Monaco. In reality, that had been the first domino to fall, and everything that happened afterward was merely a consequence of it.

Alyssane Velaryon and Aegon Targaryen came from an already complicated family. Aegon's mother, Alicent, used to be the best friend of Alyssane's mother, Rhaenyra. Up to that point, everything seemed relatively normal; things started to twist when Alicent had an affair with Rhaenyra's father and then married him, a union from which Aegon and two other siblings were born.

As surprising as this might seem, that wasn't the greatest scandal in the Targaryen family. But then again, dark secrets always seem to surround powerful families.

With growing tensions within the family, Aegon and Alyssane were raised in similar environments, but remained distant from one another, only crossing paths when strictly necessary. Of course, these situations weren't rare; within such a limited social circle, it was impossible for the families not to constantly run into each other. That turned out to be a good thing, as when they were teenagers, something almost magical happened, and suddenly, everyone was at peace again.

Perhaps their mothers were to blame.

When their mothers became inseparable once more, they wanted to do the same with their children. That was why they presented the idea of doing a semester abroad in Monaco to both of them.

Why Monaco? They didn’t know for sure, but they suspected it had something to do with their mothers' rekindled friendship. In the end, they both agreed, each for their own reasons: Aegon, drawn by the parties and excesses a wealthy country like Monaco could offer, and Alyssane, excited by the freedom it promised—especially a semester without having to constantly keep an eye on her three brothers, which sounded like a dream.

The first few weeks, however, they remained distant. Despite living in the same apartment, they barely saw each other due to their differing schedules. When they did run into each other at parties, their interactions lasted no more than a couple of minutes.

When they started missing home, they unconsciously decided to spend more time together. Then came what Alyssane always describes as one of the worst chapters of her life—when her boyfriend broke up with her, claiming that the distance had affected their relationship too much. It was a cheap excuse, considering the guy had a private jet and could have flown to the principality whenever he wanted, but as flimsy as his excuse was, it still managed to wound Alyssane's heart. They had been together since they were fifteen; she hadn’t known anything else and felt like her life had ended with that relationship.

Maybe Monaco was to blame.

If they hadn’t gone to Monaco, Alyssane’s heart wouldn’t have been broken, and she wouldn’t have had to seek refuge in the only person who could remind her, even a little, of home—Aegon.

Her mother was too busy with business matters, and although Alyssane knew that she would fly over immediately to be by her side, she didn’t want to bother her.

And Aegon, even though he wasn’t always attentive to the things happening around him, immediately noticed his niece's absence from school. He figured it was normal enough, given her recent breakup, but when he realized that her absence extended to the parties she used to love, he started to worry for real.

When he finally gathered the courage to barge into her room and found her in that horrible self-imposed isolation, he felt terrible—especially because he had been going from party to party, fueling rumors about himself while she, who deserved for people to care about her, was there, wasting away in her sadness.

At first, it seemed a bit exaggerated to him that Alyssane, at nineteen, was so heartbroken over a breakup. She had money, she was beautiful, and with her charming personality, the moment she announced she was single, messages would pour in. But then he understood that Alyssane and her ex-boyfriend had been together since they were fifteen; she hadn’t known anything else.

That’s when he knew he had to be there for her, because his father always said family needed to stick together and support each other when times seemed darkest. It had started as a purely brotherly and innocent act, but soon it began to turn into something different.

Maybe it had been his fault.

He should have kept his distance; of all the times he could’ve followed his father’s advice, he had chosen this one. If he hadn’t tried to lift his niece’s spirits with a motivational talk, then nothing would have happened.

"You still have so much left to experience. He was just one of many idiots," he told her at the end of his lengthy talk.

They were sitting on the floor of her room, backs against the bed, with a couple of empty wine bottles beside them. The glasses in their hands were still full.

"So, you're saying I should meet more idiots?" she asked.

"You should actually stay away from them," Aegon replied with a soft laugh. "It's just that, in this world, you'll come across plenty. In the end, what's important is learning to spot them before they hurt you."

"Maybe you're right," she said, taking a sip of wine. "But I can't help feeling a little lost. He was... everything. I don’t know anything more."

"Then get to know more," he shrugged. "I'm sure there are hundreds out there who would do anything to get your attention. We have the blessing—or curse, depending on how you see it—of being part of one of the most powerful families. That means many will do whatever it takes for a bit of our time."

"And that also means I’ll have to pay attention to their intentions," Alyssane said, frowning.

"That's the only way to learn how to spot the idiots," Aegon added.

Alyssane smiled bitterly and nodded, falling silent for a moment as she let his words settle in her mind. Aegon was right; his words felt insightful, and before that day, she wouldn’t have believed he could offer good advice.

"And what about you? Are you an idiot too?" the brunette asked after a while, blinking rapidly to ward off the tears threatening to surface.

"Haven't you read everything they say about me? Apparently, I'm the disgrace of House Targaryen," he replied with a smile, turning to look at her.

Alyssane’s gaze locked onto Aegon’s, and he became acutely aware of the strange weight pressing down on his chest. Before that night, he had never noticed how beautiful she was; sure, most of their family members were quite good-looking, but now, as he looked at her closely, he realized she was truly stunning.

"They don’t know what they’re talking about," she said simply, knowing that what the media portrayed rarely aligned perfectly with reality.

"Or maybe they do. Maybe I am a bit of a disaster."

Aegon wanted to look away, to stop staring at her because the weight in his chest grew heavier with each passing second, and he didn’t know how to handle it.

"Disasters are interesting," was her conclusion, which she sealed by gulping down the rest of her wine.

Maybe the wine was to blame.

Alyssane used to drink, but whenever she did, it was at a party, dancing and socializing so much that she barely noticed the effects of alcohol on her body. Now, sitting there without the frenzy, she could feel them clearly.

Her body felt numb, heavy; when she went out, the images would swirl around her like a colorful blur, but this time it felt like every second was etched carefully in her mind. Her lips tingled strangely, and she felt an overwhelming need to be held. She studied Aegon for a moment, wondering if it would be too weird if she just...

"What are you doing?" the silver-haired one asked as she straddled him.

It seemed the alcohol still gave her the ability to act on her impulses.

"A hug," she whispered, adjusting to find the best position. "Is it too weird?"

He had to say yes; one didn’t hug family members like that, and Aegon knew it. He had to admit that it made him uncomfortable because she was his niece, but Aegon couldn’t lie when he was drunk; he simply couldn’t.

"It’s not the weirdest thing anyone’s asked me, certainly," he said, unable to suppress a chuckle.

Alyssane wrapped her arms around Aegon’s neck, and he instinctively placed his arms around her back, settling into a comfortable embrace. The closeness felt strange and confusing, but neither of them made an effort to pull away.

The silence that followed was awkward at first, but the tension in the air lightened enough, and it was only broken by the heavy sigh that escaped Alyssane’s lips as she rested her head on Aegon’s shoulder.

"Sometimes I feel really lonely," she whispered.

Aegon felt, for a moment, that his niece's words pierced him like a dagger. He wasn't sure how to respond, but he understood that loneliness better than he wanted to admit; in a world like his, solitude was more common than one would expect and it lingered even when surrounded by people.

"You shouldn’t."

Unconsciously, his hands moved along her back, gently caressing her as a form of comfort. Alyssane's warm breath tickled pleasantly against his neck, and her weight on his lap did not go unnoticed; after all, he was still human, and alcohol never failed to make him more receptive to physical sensations.

Everything was mixing together, making it hard for him to keep his thoughts in the right place. He knew he shouldn't feel this way. But the combination of alcohol, silence, and the shared moment of vulnerability created an atmosphere that urged him to cross boundaries he knew shouldn’t be crossed.

"You’re not alone."

Due to their position, Aegon's lips brushed against Alyssane's temple, and his words ended up being whispered in her ear, sending a pleasant shiver through her that made her shift in place, directly causing friction against Aegon's groin. He quickly placed his hands on either side of her hips, keeping her still.

"Alyssane..." he murmured as a warning.

She finally lifted her head, looking into his eyes, and settled back onto him, smiling slyly as her movement drew a sigh from Aegon.

"We shouldn't," he said, his voice sounding much less firm than he had expected.

And his actions betrayed him too, because instead of pulling away, he leaned in closer to her, brushing his nose against Alyssane's, their breaths mingling in the small space between them. Aegon closed his eyes for a moment, trying to regain his composure, but the warmth radiating from Alyssane's body embraced him so comfortingly that it was impossible to think of anything but her and the closeness they were sharing.

"Why not?" Alyssane asked, her tone challenging common sense. There was a spark in her eyes that seemed to light up everything around them, and Aegon realized he didn't want to pull away.

Alyssane dared to press a careless kiss on Aegon's cheek, the warmth of her lips feeling better than any other display of affection he had ever received in his life. The contact made him open his eyes, looking at her with a mix of astonishment and desire.

His heart raced wildly, as if it wanted to leap out of his chest, and his hands tingled, eager to explore more of the girl on top of him, yet held back by that thin thread of morality that still remained.

Maybe they were to blame.

"Tell me you don't want this," Aegon whispered as a plea, though it was really a desperate attempt not to get caught up in that spiral of complications. "We still have time to—"

"What if I do want it?" she interrupted abruptly, a smile still painted on her face as she looked directly into his eyes.

Aegon smiled too, shaking his head slightly; sometimes he forgot that capriciousness was one of the greatest traits of the Targaryens. No one ever denied them anything simply for being who they were; they took what they wanted when they wanted, and no one could do anything about it.

And at that moment, all they wanted was each other, even if it felt forbidden. Who could tell them no? Who was there to stop them?

"Is it wrong?" Alyssane questioned, placing another kiss on Aegon’s face, this time on his jaw. "Is it a mistake?" She moved again, doing her best to be as suggestive as she could.

"Technically—" His gaze couldn't tear away from her, specifically from her lips, which were slightly parted, almost as if inviting him to taste them. Alyssane shifted again, and Aegon’s grip on her hips loosened, allowing her to take the lead.

"But it doesn’t feel wrong."

In truth, it did feel very wrong, but that only fueled their desires in an oddly lustful way that they probably wouldn’t be able to articulate if they had to.

"Then what does it matter?" she asked, inching even closer to him as if it were impossible to get any nearer.

And those words were enough to untie any knot that had been holding his very flexible morality in place. He tilted his face just a few millimeters, immediately reaching Alyssane's lips, barely brushing against them as if asking for permission to continue; she pulled him closer and finally pressed their lips together.

It wasn't a delicate kiss; it wasn't laden with emotions. It sought to express nothing more than the pure desire that had ignited between them that night. Though perhaps it wasn't entirely new—more like a flame that had been smoldering within them for some time. After all, during the time they had lived together, it was impossible to deny that, at least once, both had featured in each other's fantasies.

Aegon's hands felt liberated as they finally roamed Alyssane's body without restraint. The first place he touched was her legs; the fair skin of the young Velaryon was exposed by the light silk dress she wore that night. His fingers sank sweetly into her thighs, eliciting a gasp from her. Taking advantage of her parted lips, Aegon moved his own directly to Alyssane's neck.

He slowly trailed his lips across her neck, then dared to let his tongue trace a path from her left collarbone to her chin and back again. Aegon's grip intensified, and he bit his lip, restraining himself from marking her as he desired.

“Do it,” she said simply, burying her hands in the silver strands of his hair. Aegon looked at her, questioning her decision. “If we're breaking the rules, let’s make it worth it.”

Aegon's gaze darkened, and a mischievous smile curled on his lips before he returned to assaulting the curve of her neck, sucking hard in places, leaving faint red marks that would surely shine in the morning light and eliciting soft moans from Alyssane's lips.

Aegon was quick to silence his niece's sounds, drowning them out with his own lips as he played with his tongue inside Alyssane's mouth. His already painful erection was imprisoned by his own clothes and the girl's weight on top of him, but he didn't want to release it now because the friction was delicious. His hands got lost under her dress and he was quick to lustfully grab her ass, squeezing it while forcing her to rub herself against him even more, feeling her warm wetness begin to soak his lap.

A smile crept between the kisses and he brought his hand to the front. The sensation of the lace on his fingertips was annoying, so he was quick to push the fabric aside looking for direct contact with her skin, his eager touch snatched a moan from her and he exhaled heavily when he felt her.

“Soaking wet already?” he asked in a mocking whisper, pulling back just to observe her reaction.

Alyssane frowned and was about to respond with some clever comment, but her words died in her throat when one of Aegon's fingers ran through her folds, drawing a sigh from her that she tried to silence by biting her lip.

“No, baby, let me hear you” he said firmly, his finger tracing the same path as before and this time a light gasp escaped from Alyssane's lips that made him smile sideways. “That's it”

His fingers moved expertly in her center and when she least expected it, she felt the intrusion of one of them. A small cry of pleasure filled the room and joined in a symphony with Aegon's gasps as he felt Alyssane's insides tighten around his fingers as she moved on top of him.

The tightness of the young woman was clear and he felt a shiver run through him as he imagined how she would feel around him, his lips parted and a moan escaped.

"How long has it been since you...?" His answer was interrupted by a wet kiss from the brunette.

"Before coming to Monaco," she replied between gasps, Aegon seemed scandalized by the answer and she rolled her eyes. "Not all of us are as promiscuous as you."

“Experienced. The word is...” he was interrupted again, this time by Alyssane's cold hand sneaking mischievously inside his pants, making him sigh immediately “Fuck...”

Her hand wrapped around his member and gave it a light squeeze, the movements of Aegon's hand sped up as well and soon they were both trying to match each other's rhythm, filling the room with lust-filled sounds that sweetened her ears.

Alyssane closed her eyes for a second when the sensations suddenly overwhelmed her, the way Aegon continued to move his fingers in and out was taking her to the limit, although in reality it was the fact of knowing that what they were doing was too forbidden that excited her the most.

Aegon was breathless, unable to contain the gasps escaping his lips, feeling a familiar tingle spread throughout his body; only then did he dare to remove his fingers from inside Alyssane to stop her from moving her hand around him as well.

He didn't give her any explanations even when she was about to ask for them, he just hurriedly freed his member from the layers of clothing that now seemed too uncomfortable, he didn't have the time to stop and undress them both thoroughly, although he was tempted to do so if it meant discovering and conquering every part of Alyssane's body; however, the urgency of being inside her was greater than any other of his needs.

“I need... I...” he gasped, looking into her eyes, unable to articulate coherent phrases as desire overwhelmed his senses. “Come here” he muttered, grabbing her firmly by the waist and positioning her on top of him, doing everything he could to keep the annoying lace of her underwear out of the way.

A glimmer of reason seemed to shine in Aegon’s mind; what they were doing was already risky, and he didn’t want to increase those possibilities.

"Wait, I don't have a condom..."

His words hung in the air like an unimportant warning as Alyssane slid over him, making him enter her in one thrust. The sensation was overwhelming for both of them; a muffled moan escaped Aegon's lips while Alyssane let out a deep gasp, closing her eyes immediately as the sudden intrusion had caused a burning sensation that spread down her spine, which was to be expected as she had spent so much time without company other than his fingers that Aegon's well-endowed presence made her feel like she was being split right in half.

The intensity of the moment made Aegon tighten his hands around her waist, as if he wanted to make sure that this was real and not a dream fueled by his repressed desires; the warmth inside Alyssane felt unreal, perhaps it was his own lust speaking, but Aegon could assure that no other woman he had been with felt this good, it was as if she had been made specifically for him. That thought caused a shudder that Alyssane also felt as spasms in Aegon's member.

"It's okay," she whispered, pressing their foreheads together. "I'm still on the pill."

Aegon sighed and smirked. "Thank God."

Aegon was grateful that he didn't have to use protection, for now he couldn't imagine having any restrictions, even minimal, that would prevent him from fully enjoying what she was giving him. Alyssane giggled and rose up over him slowly, just enough to make most of his member slip out of her, only to lower herself back down again with a snap. They both moaned in unison, the brunette gripping the other's shoulders with shaking hands, playing with the thin fabric of his shirt.

The girl went up and down in a deliciously slow rocking motion, seeking to relieve the feeling of discomfort in her body, as she did so and Aegon dissolved into moaning noises an idea assaulted the silver-haired man's mind; according to his niece's own words, her now ex-boyfriend had not taken her to bed in a long time, the thought alone made him upset.

He had barely received a little from her, contrary to how much she had surely offered that idiot, and just that little had been enough to blow his mind, he was definitely eager to try much more of her.

How could he have left her unattended for so long? He wouldn't do it, he...

"I would travel however many miles it took to have you like this," he whispered against her lips. Something changed in Alyssane's smile, and although Aegon didn't recognize it immediately, he felt a sense of satisfaction. "And that's what you deserve."

“Miles?” she asked, her teasing smile returning, though her voice was breathless with the pleasure she felt in every movement.

“Hundreds of them...” Aegon growled, a similarly mischievous smile on his lips, his eyes shining with lust.

Alyssane let out a moan as she felt him take complete control, lifting his hips to meet hers, driving the rhythm faster, deeper. The thought that he needed her as much as she needed him made her body tremble.

“That’s what you deserve, what you should look for—someone who won’t leave you alone,” his breath came erratically, each movement filling him with an intense pleasure that made it hard to maintain control.

Alyssane shut her eyes tightly, surrendering to the sensation of being so close to him, so connected in body and desire. The possessive tone in Aegon’s voice sent shivers down her spine, and a part of her knew that, no matter how dangerous those words were, she craved more of that wild, unrestrained devotion that had sparked like a lustful flame and was now consuming them with intensity, enveloping them in the excessive heat of the flames that, far from harming them, provided comfort.

“Will you ever leave me alone?” she asked, gasping as she quickened her movements. “‘After tonight, will you leave me alone?’”

“Never...” he replied between breaths, but he paused for a moment, moving one hand to cradle her face with a tenderness that contrasted with the passion of the moment. “Not after this. Never.”

“Then I don’t have to look for anyone else,” she declared before capturing Aegon’s lips with hers.

And although the Velaryon’s words were decisive and carried a weight they would later have to confront, Aegon didn’t care in the slightest—or maybe he cared too much—but he decided he agreed with that sentiment, even if he didn’t fully understand why. He just knew that no matter how hard he searched, no one would be worthy enough to have her.

Caught in the heat of the moment and the suffocating yet sweet lust of knowing what they were doing was just for them, he resolved that he was worthy of it. He could care for her and please her; in recent days, he had proven he could provide for her, and now he was showing he could give her the pleasure that the fool who had her hadn’t wanted to offer.

“Don’t do it. Don’t look for anyone else.”

They were to blame for giving in and yielding so easily. But it felt good—not just physically; that night was the first in their lives when they didn’t feel completely empty. And that was enough for both of them.

Alyssane:

[thatbigbisexual29]

hey same person from the last anon message (yes the ler hobie ne!!) but i js thought of something else to add on to that hehe - i feel like if he was really having fun or if he knew it worked on you, hed be really teasy and he would think its funny if you got all embarrassed. sayin stuff like "yer pre'y ticklish, huh?" or "you got a nice laugh on ya' mate, you should really show it off more." but if he was reeeeally having fun, i think he would start babying you. i feel like hed say stuff like "awww, you like that, don' ya?" or little phrases like "tickle tickle tickle~" just to mess with you if he knew it made you all blushy (and hed over use the t-word) >w< lmk what u think tho!! also i saw someone else use an emoji for anon, soooo im gonna use 🐀! just in case i end up asking a lot

Augh I love this!!!! 😍😍😍 he would absolutely take advantage of this and just tease you silly that has you meeting before he even gets his hands on you 🫠

Let’s say if he’s dating you, he’ll just snuggle up beside you while’s you’re cuddling and whisper evil little teases in your ear while he softly traces his fingers on your tickle spots and he’ll just say “kitchy kitchy~ tickle tickle tickle~ you want me to tickle you so bad, hm?~ you just want me to tickle you silly~ I can do that, but I want to have fun first~” ahajbdshsbsjsjsnsjs I’m getting into a Lee mood just typing this out 🫣🫣🫣 but with his friends, he just likes teasing the shit out of them cause it’s funny. He’d baby talk them cause they love hate it so much 🤣

[m0llygunn]

/735662509094289408

oh but it does ruin the friendship. ~the angst commences~ imagine him toying around with someone, only because his own life is so difficult to control and he’s sick of it. he’s sick of his life being so unpredictable and troubled, so he resorts to using someone else’s to play around and have fun with. he’s the puppet master and the poor person just takes it because they actually love eddie💔💔💔he wants to kiss them one night (because he feels particularly unlovable that day so what better way to release the pain by inviting his ‘friend’ over) and tells them exactly that, “a little kiss wouldn’t hurt our friendship”

so they kiss. and it all goes to shit. they go off on eddie, “i can’t do this anymore! you’re playing with my feelings and it hurts me so much…do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?! i can’t stick around you anymore, i’m out of here,”

and then eddie is left to think about what he’s done.

anyway sorry for the random story, i was just thinking about it cuz i sure love me some angst <///3 and i think it’s interesting to look into a side of eddie that wouldn’t be particularly likable. lmk what u think tho. do u think eddie would come to develop actual real feelings for this person? would he even apologize at all and would it even work out?

ok i’m done now hope u have a good day :) ✨

nono don't apologize i love the story, thank you!! also i love the puppet master analogy, obviously because of master of puppets, but also because I used to be a puppeteer at a local theatre company!! you're speaking my language lol

i'm just gonna put a read more here so that this isn't a long post, and clickable link here to the referenced post!

I also really like the whole 'unlikable' kind of characters thing, and especially with Eddie's background, I always think that him serving those sorts of motifs produces very fascinating storylines. Canonically he has such strong redeeming qualities, that I think giving him some bad qualities never seems all that terrible, plus its just fun and interesting to read! In terms of how it would end, in my opinion, I think it definitely depends! Sorry thats kind of a bad answer but it could go so many ways? Like in some scenarios it could be the catalyst to them getting together, but it also could be the catalyst of things going really wrong if Eddie isn't willing to change. I also think that if Eddie were to pick on someone it would be because he already likes them to start with, so he would have to go through a lot of internal processes to come into his own, and eventually be able to move forward for sure!

Side note— I've actually been working on a sort of 'morally grey' characterization so I'm interested which ending is your preference? Like angst angst or happy ending? (my thing's already written, I just haven't had it in me to edit it, but spoiler its kind of like those movies where nothing happens but everything changes, but also nothing changes? very unproductive storyline but I think that in itself is valuable because life follows that storyline quite frequently).

I read a fic before kind of like your story so i just went for a deep dive looking for it lol I think you might like it! You can click here for it :) This one is from Eddie's pov so theres a lot of his internal processes, and I think it's just a good read.

Another fic that comes to mind is a series. It's a bully!eddie three part-er (i think) with a pick your own ending (which i think is soso cool and you don't see very often), so maybe you'd want to check that out too! Link is here for that one! I also like how this one gives a preface to why Eddie becomes a 'bully' and I just really like the story in general!

If either links don't work, let me know! I'll probably reblog them after this too :)

sorry this was so long omg, but thank you again for sending me your story, I truly appreciate it and love it sm!! (also i saw your other ask and I want to write something for it but it might take me a while with exams and everything come up, sorry!)

[jwsflower]

Five

SYNOPSIS: You’ve been bestfriends and crushing on jungwon since middle school, but the day you planned to confess to him he never came to school. Later finding out that he had moved schools without telling you. Few year later when you had moved on you heard that theres a new student. You didnt think much of it, but...?

Pairing: Jungwon x fem!reader

Warnings: none that i can think of but lmk if there are any!!

It was 6am and you heard your alarm ringing.

“Ugh im not looking forward to school today at all, i have to ask Mr. Choi if i can switch groups with someone” you thought outloud.

When you were ready you texted the gc to ask who can pick u up.

15 minutes later you heard a beep outside and that was ur sign to walk ouside.

“Morningg sunny, tysm again for pick me up today” you smiled at him.

“Ofc its nothing Yn, do u wanna get some coffee before school??” he asked u

“Ohh yeah sure lets gooo” you replied

We both go into car and started to drive to Starbucks. You guys were driving in comfortable silence but then he spoke up.

“Hey, but are you okay after yesterday?”

“Yeah, im okay im atleast glad that chae and hoon explained themselves cuz i woulve been very upset if they lied to me.. “ you spoke up.

“Yeahh..” Sunoo dryly replied.

But little did you know that deep down Sunoo still thought that something was suspicious about both of them.

*time skip them already arriving at school cuz im lazy*

“Were heree” Sunoo spoke up brightly.

“Im not excited abt today at all, i have to ask mr. Choi to switch groups with someone else bc im not working with Jake.” you replied

“Good luck with that..” Sunoo laughed

“Thanks.. okay lets go to class now” you said that as you started walking into school.

When you walked into school you didnt expect seeing Yang Jungwon standing right next to your locker.

“You gotta be kidding me" you said under breath.

Before you could say anything Sunoo spoke up first. “ Ay Yang what are you doing here, Yn is not interested to talk to you rn. “

“Please I really want to explain myself and talk to her” he was basically begging.

But then you spoke up “ Jungwon i made it clear to you yesterday, give me time and maybe. just maybe im gonna give you a chance but please rn leave me alone”

“Okay, ill give you time just tell me when. Im gonna be waiting for you” he said that as he was walking away.

“Really yn? ur gonna give him a chance” Sunoo asked.

“I never heard him out, so maybe it wouldn't hurt hear what he has to say to me. And also im long moved from him so this isnt some pitying my crush thing. “ you replied

“Whatever you say Yn.. but now we should go to class” he pulled you by hand.

But deep down you thought, ‘ have i moved on tho ‘ you weren't too sure abt that part.

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note: Okay hi, its been quite a white since i wrote a chapter (like 3 months). Honestly i wasnt busy or something, its just i didn't have any inspo for a long time and i just didnt want to write something confusing or dumb so i just took time off. From now on ill try posting whenever i can but i wont be doing 2-3 updates cuz i feel pressure so ill post whenever i feel like and try to not disappear again. Again Thank you if u read this and thank you for waiting.

Taglist: open! (send and ask tba)

Taglist: @hiqhkey @enhacolor @she-is-dreaming @lovienikitty @lauvvai @ch0ijiung @wonieleles @enhasengene @harperwasstaken1 @heartj4yn0 @lil-iva @yvesismywife @brokeprimogems

[hirokiyuu]

Hello I am someone who deeply loves The Twins and Enjoys Talking about The Twins. There just...It's hard to make coherent words but I love how similar the two are, there arcs are sort of reflections of each others and I really love that, also If I'm friends with one twin I have to befriend the author, I just need to be close to the both of them. On more coherent meta stuff I find both twins perspectives on wanting to be something else really interesting. I'm trying to tiptoe the best I can around possible spoilers but I really do love them. There good lads.

SHAKING UR FUCKING HAND

(cut for spoilers!)

i really love how clearly both tang+dys are like........ HEAVILY damaged by their mother's abuse even on a colony where Everyone Is Family! it's really interesting narratively speaking that even in this supposed-to-be perfect experiment already from the start is like....... someone who's damaged these kids so bad for literally the rest of their lives

like tang's constant desire to basically leave her flesh behind....... fear of addiction yet her own obsession w/science......... fixation on chief engineer as a surrogate mother to the point where she rejects her own brother......... and yet when that brother vanishes she's SO messed up by it so clearly like. she's always looking for some kind of affection+love and yet her own fears+coping mechs make it so hard for her to keep it. ive only dated her once but my friend also did and got a dif ending and we both got dumped so honestly like. if she just dumps u ever time u date. narratively perfect

and then on the other side of the coin is dys and like his Total Rejection of all the ppl around him and like........ his belief esp at the start when u approach him that ur just gonna try and make fun of/hurt him. how in every ending ive had w/him he's become a gardener. his overwhelming desire for connection is sooooo fun esp in conjunction w/how he doesnt think he can ever connect with PEOPLE its so good. i love dys i am cupping him in my palms

i havent gotten them to reconcile yet but my friend was saying smth abt how u have to make......... rex's bar???????????? which requires four pets?????????????????????????? idk man im just squinting but im sure ill get there eventually. not next time tho next time i am unfortunately going full fasc*st kill all the aliens run solely to see what its like

if u wanna come off anon and talk to me in private lmk btw. i am clawing at the walls

[muwur]

do u think u could write something fluffy for atsumu? :D (if not, bc he just showed up in the anime, futakuchi?) nd they/them pronouns pls :3 ty ty!!!

dating headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for atsumu and futakuchi

❧ gn reader

✎ 1.6k words

a/n: oml my first request fgrinffej thank u anon <3 been doing sum ~research~ and brainstorming snaccing and i hope this is okay ! >:) for u i shall do both ppl hehe. feel free to lmk if you would like me to redo or add anything, i wanna do my requests justice :*)

also i find myself gettin inspo at 4 am ofhfuohf i hope this is a bit fluffy, tho its a bit playful n snarky as well fnoggrefjf. also this took me so long bc i literaly got this whole other idea LMAOOOO but i find it more suitable as a separate piece so be on the lookout for that (nudge nudge itll feature atsumu ;) i got a bit carried away AAHA). here u goo

atsumu

✧ boi’s a tease

✧ on days he stays really late to practice so like?? most days LOL  you drop by a nearby eatery and pick up some fatty tuna (or something else, you like to change it up sometimes even if fatty tuna is his fave)  for him to munch on (gotta replenish your body!!)

✧ even though it’s for him, he’ll make you share the food with him as you both sit on a field nearby the gym

✧ likes to feed you but exaggerates it just to mess with you

✧ “say ahh, y/n” he coos with a smirk when he holds out some food from his chopsticks

✧ and just to mess with him back, you close your mouth around the piece, taking it from the chopsticks slowly and never breaking eye contact with him until after you chew and swallow

✧ “ah, that was delicious, honey” you smile cheekily

✧ rip atsumu, he malfuncc inside

✧ however

✧ fights you for the last piece of any food or snack you’re sharing

✧ “why even offer sharing if you’re just gonna hog it all”

✧ “you were just slower than me, that’s not my problem”

✧ in the end, he would definitely just let you have it. Only fights you when hes bored and wants to provoke you, which is often

✧ pretty affectionate in public. likes to ruffle your hair or place a head on your hand, no matter what height you are

✧ especially likes to do this when you’re annoyed at him, which kinda makes it not cute anymore and you just wanna punch him in the face

✧ as annoying as he could be tho you had to admit that your bickering could be quite fun he was definitely a caring partner

✧ is quick to take notice how youre feeling, liek:

✧  “hey, are you feeling okay?”

✧ “yeah im fine, why?”

✧ “you know you dont have to lie, right? you cant hide these things, anyways, i can just tell if something’s up. what’s wrong, babe?”

✧ pulls you aside to talk things out a little, then offers to spend some time together after practice  

✧ squeezes your hand as he walks you home, plants a soft kiss to your forehead before parting ways, and says goodnight

✧ he also notices any changes, no matter how small, in your appearances:

✧ *scrutinizing you* “what do you want, atsumu?”

✧ “did you do something different today? maybe like with your hair or uniform or something?”

✧ “o-oh, yeah, i did.”

✧ “hm. it really suits you, actually.”

✧ “oh, thanks. it’s such a small change, i didnt think anyone would notice--”

✧  “dont get too ahead of yourself, i didnt say it looked nice-- im kidding, im kidding!” he has to say in order to defend himself from your piercing glare

✧ lowkey highkey cant go long without seeing you

✧ so when he finally gets to spend some time with you, he’s even more touchy than usual

✧ you eye him suspiciously before saying, “you’re acting like you missed me or something”

✧  “yeah, i did miss you. something wrong with that?” he asks, burying his face in your neck as he hugs you from behind

✧ “yes, because its been two days”

✧ expect lots of kisses and hugs, though. mans is deprived and he gets what he wants (with consent, of course)

✧ makes sure everyone knows he’s there to stand up for you if necessary, which can be pretty intimidating

✧ loves it when you fall asleep on his shoulder. will take selfies with your sleeping face and show you later

✧  “you look cute even when you’re drooling all over my arm”

✧ doesn’t talk about how he sniffed or kissed your head when you were asleep. definitely doesn’t admit how he was whispering about how lucky he was to be in love with you asdfghjk

✧ was the first to admit he loved you

✧ it occurred after his team won a game to qualify for nationals. excitedly, you raced your way to meet him and tackled him in a hug. who cares if he was sweaty. “i knew you guys would win, and im so proud, atsumu.”

✧ he stumbled a bit and hugged back. he pulled away shortly to look you in the eye

✧  “y/n, i love you.”

✧ and all you could do was blush before he pulled you into a soft, yet passionate kiss

✧ surrounded by like. literally everyone lol

✧ osamu just fake gags in the background

✧ later that day:

✧  “sooooo do I get a reward for winning ? ;)”

✧  “dont push your luck”

✧ but you do spend the night just chilling at his place, watching a movie and cuddling, unwinding from a long day

futakuchi

✧ you met each other in class, bonding over how bored and sleepy you both were

✧ one day he started passing you notes and you went with along it until this class’s purpose in y’alls lives was just for goofing off and totally not to see each other’s smiles or be a bit flirty

✧ loves to mess around with you, but also thinks highly of you

✧ shortly after you started dating and met the boy’s volleyball team, moniwa asks you to please keep futakuchi in line

✧  “babe, please, you’re driving your seniors crazy”

✧ but ever since he became captain, you could sense that futakuchi seemed more responsible

✧ but poor bby was also wayyyy more tired than usual

✧ you poked his back with your pencil whenever you found him dozing off in class, just in time before he risked getting caught by the teacher

✧ you also nagged him about getting more rest and maintaining his health, doing things to help him out until he gave in and made a better attempt at taking care of himself

✧ unless you have other activities going on, you’d usually come by the gym to watch practice and then walk home with futakuchi

✧ you always bring him and his team snacks. they all love you, especially koganegawa

✧ “how are you and y/n dating, they’re so much nicer than futaku--”

✧ cant even finish his sentence before the captain smacks his head and poor kogane chokes on his snacc

✧ but les be real you also go to admire your manz

✧ on the walk home one day:

✧  “you hit a really good spike today”

✧ sheepishly scratches the back of his head, “oh, thanks. kogane’s sets are improving, so it’s getting easier to hit the ball”

✧ secretly loves and craves your praise

✧ futakuchi’s pretty down for pda. you two can often be seen walking down the aisles, hand in hand

✧ will also give you lots of pecks, especially on your cheeks and lips

✧ he also insists on helping you carry your things

✧ wants you to rely on him

✧ saw you shivering once and took his jacket off, draping it around you like nbd

✧ lets just say he wishes he coulda thought of that sooner dhqnwxhgergk  youre not allowed to look this cute

✧ but now you literally keep half his closet in your house cuz he always tells you to return it whenever you want

✧ could go on dates anywhere and literally have such a good time. the night market? y’all will share foods and play games the whole time. the park? he could go for a nice, relaxing walk, or if it’s at night, he’d love to lie in the grass and admire the night sky with you (as long as you hold hands lol). at home? would totally binge some shows or movies with you, has sour gummies n a blanket ready to share hog

✧ can be a tease, but will protect you at all costs

✧ glares at anyone who looks at you with interest (boi gets jealous)

✧ had to pull you into his arms and give you a kiss to save you from getting hit on by someone from a rival school. “hey babe, i’ve been looking for you. let’s head back, everyone’s waiting.”

✧ you happily follow him, not noticing how futakuchi looks back at his now sworn-enemy and sticks his tongue out at them

✧ he will fIGHT anyone who hurts you, is very overprotective to say the least

✧ always makes sure he knows where you’re at, starts to worry a bit if you’ve gone mia

✧ got reallly worried one time when he called you like 5 times and you didnt pick up!

✧ 20 minutes later his phone rings and he picks it up immediately. “hello? y/n? are you okay?? you haven’t been answering me for a while.”

✧  “ahh, yes, im sorry about that, my phone died :P”

✧ thinks the best cuddles are the ones in which you both end up falling asleep. also likes to admire your sleeping face totes not a creeper

✧ also loveloveloves to snuggle you from behind and bury his face in your neck and loves to just smELL you

✧ you told him you loved him first

✧ you were having a rough day when you heard a knock on your door

✧ opening it, you found a futakuchi giving you a small smile and carrying a plastic bag full of goodies. “i, uh, didn’t want you to be alone, so i thought we could hang out for a bit? just us two, your favorite snacks, and whatever else you want to do”

✧ touched by his gesture, you pulled him in by his jacket’s collar and gave him a long kiss

✧ after separating, you looked into his eyes as you cupped his face gently. “thank you, kenji. i love you. this means a lot to me”

✧ ejiufnicenjfdhksujsk he nearly melted in place

✧ later tries playing the pocky game with you, but then y’all forget about the pocky after your first round and stick to the smooching

[selfcareparker]

(lovely anon) i'm so happy to finally be answering this oh my goodness hi gorgeous human being i feel that it has been too long 🥲 SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED SINCE THE LAST TIME I'VE WRITTEN ONE OF THESE HOW HAVE YOU BEEN

to answer the things you have said most recently- i'm so mad that spring break is over bc now i have to go back to life??? like dancing and school and shit that feels so unnessacry 😭 and like i can't just do nothing anymore? i was so used to it and now...... ugh. i STILL haven't played sims (i think it's because ✨depression✨ be hitting sometimes) lol but MWAHAH IM SO HAPPY FOR YOUR NEIGHBOR!AU AND THAT THEY HAD LITTLE BABY LEO!! i feel the name thing.. i just come up with something that sounds nice? i think leo is a nice name, it makes me think about lea michele and the fact that her son's name is Ever Leo but anyway. i don't name my sims after what i want to name my children irl either... idk why though. (i don't know why i'm telling you this but for boy names i love Liam🥰 and if i had twin boys i think i would do Liam and Peter though i am not married to the name Peter.... anywho)

LMAOOO the therpaist coming made me laugh thank you :)) i hope it's helpful? this may be tmi but i've only really had negative thoughts recently and not many healthy outlets so i'm hoping crossing one thing off this sad list will make me feel better :') i think during spring break my anxiety and my depression really spiked? idk, it comes in episodes but yeah THIS GOT REALLY SAD

i think a lot of things when i read your posts but i never say them hahaha so imma say it now: i googled what bon appetit meant ( i also just had to google how to spell it ) but ur right, i feel like bone apple tea makes more sense than bone apple teeth.. the "th" is throwing me off bc how i say it bone appa (like app-a) teet (like you're saying tit but teet lol) so bone apple tea makes more sense to me lol

i never know really know the time difference for anything lmao but est to germany (that's not gmt is it?) is like 6 hours wOAH so it's like 9pm while it’s 3pm here? wowee

i feel mega weird after watching this show called hollywood (darren criss is in it, so is laura harrier and a bunch of other people) but i don't like it💀 i feel really icky rn and idk why but reading your last response to my ask (?) always makes me feel better :')

i am doing what you said btw, i'm typing this on my computer first then gonna transfer it to my phone's tumblr lol but when you said a digital detox, it's interesting cuz i feel like i've been having one since tom's new project was announced? gOD i don't wanna get into it bc i get so triggered but i've been off of instagram since then bc instagram stans literally stand by tom through whatever even when something ain't right- i’m just gonna leave it there bc i’ll continue the rant, but yeah so i took a break lol

also heard abt your driving lesson thing (?) was it that bad? i can't find the old post but someone asked if you hooked up with your lesson person and i was sOOO CONFUSED LMAOO LIKE OK ARIA GET SOME BUT UHH HUH?

now to address the actual response HAHA the way you touch my heart :') by :') bringing :') up :') halle :') being ariel :') (i honest to God don't remember if i brought this up first, forgive me if i did, it's been a minute lmao) i'm always talking about it and i'm pretty sure my family is so tired of me talking about it lmao, but YEAH when i found out they weren't twins i was so surprised but idk why i always thought they were twins? but YOU ARE SPEAKING MY LANGUAGE WITH THE DISNEY TALK- everyone is always like "tiana is my favorite princess" and yea she's strong and stuff but...... she was a frog. for almost the whole time. it's about time we got another one!! i do agree with some people on the fact that disney should just make another black princess but halle is adorable and i was ariel on stage so it's already really special to me :')

yeah lol there are good times with my brothers but they make me mad for a good portion of the time (there's the 12yo vincent and the 7yo daniel but vincent??? psshhh he is a piece of work and i'm not sure how much longer i can put up with him HAJAH AND YES VINCENT IS THE ONE WHO WAS 👁👄👁WHEN I CRIED AND THE ONE WHO DOESN'T LISTEN TO MUSIC- writing this now makes it sound like vincent is awful. which he isn't... we're working on him ig. not to add to the awfulness but no, he listens to obnoxious loud VIDEO GAME MUSIC and won't stop when we ask him to stop... he gets beat up a lot) anyway i imagine being an only child is really calming.. like you have time to yourself and its just you and your parents 😌

yeah let me know if you end up watching it (wandavision)! i think it's great but if you like it lmk!! tfatws is sooo good like PHEW i am honestly loving it. sidenote: j*hn w*lker makes me wanna jump through the screen and choke him to the ground. i was thinking right, and the falcon and the winter soldier (THATS SO MUCH EASIER FAJHKDAH) would techinally be like a 10 hour movie right? because every episode is an hour long and there'll be 10 episodes? like wow. i get what you mean though, abt the racism in the show etc, like looking forward to it but not like..... no i get what you mean i will not try and give another example lol but you make me wanna learn more languages like really badly (bc of what you said about the german to american translation) & if you end up watching hamilton PLEASE LMK ABT THAT TOO HAHAHA i love it so much, same thing with lion king lmaoo

speaking of germany, i was at lunch on saturday with my mom and her friend and we were talking about my schooling and like-- she planted this idea in my head lol like what if i just got my GED and went around the world (to england probably) to get a theatre experience??? and i think it sounds so cool but no where near practical lol, it's just..... the dream haha and i would then try and learn a language 😉

uh yes we absolutely should order basically a resturant meal at a cinema, how about burgers, chips (fries), and a large drink? any time next week works for me, should i pick you up?

also about cherry (which i still haven't watched yet lol) i got the timestamps from tumblr😌 i couldn't find them anywhere else, but i agree, i probably wouldn't even look twice at cherry if tom wasn't in it? like i liked tdatt a lot, but it's not a movie i would be itching to see ya know?

HAHAHAHA THE 24 HOUR NOTIFICATION- i think i have around 1030 hours on sims? but i've had it since 2019 lmao (reading the screenshots, yes u are 100% a genuis, i take screenshots too but on anon you can't upload them so i just read them and retype what i wrote lmao) i think the university experience in the game is fun, but time consuming and it's all work imo. idk why i do it so often tho 😭😭😭

and agreed!! when you're making good money in the game you have to find other ways to make it interesting. my cousins who play it just continously do "motherlode" and i'm like.... then what do you do in your game?? it just sounds boring to me... my current sims household, i had a famous comedian sim, her name was dylan, aND SORRY IM LAUGHING SO HARD WHILE WRITING THIS BC ITS A GREAT EXAMPLE OF THE UNI THING UNLESS IM JUST DUMB, she went to college for communications when i wanted her to be a comedian and when she graduated i realized that degree did nothing for the career 🥲 so yeah, i think i'm just dumb. but she had a kid in college, guy didn't stick around and she was pretty broke HA but then she got married to this (great) guy named steve, made good bank, had 5 more kids (two sets of twins and one more lol) but then she passed. uhm... yeah that's still an open wound . lol i'm kidding, but when you get rich like that, you have to find a way to make the game interesting and i chose a million kids.

(this was one giant paragraph until i broke it up uhh yeah) i seriously don't pay attention to the sims prices and just end up spending way too much money and not being able to finish the rest of the house😭 but then again, i'm so used to having sims live in apartments... if i end up building a house FIRST OF ALL it'll look like what you explained before lmao but i'll tell you if i actually end up building a house HAHA & planning out your sims game is so fun to me lol, did enisa and michael take in his daughter yet? i may be thinking too far ahead lol and i love that they fucked woohooed (i say woo woo lol) in celebration HAHA but when i was playing with this one couple i had them woo woo every night hoping the dude would have horrible pull out game and they would concieve, but one night they were too tired and i was like why? get back in there man. if i was in college and lived with my partner we would be fucking every night homie. be grateful. i have been talking a lot about sims, and like you said: enough 💀 i just love this game a lot 😭😭

SORRY LAST THING i think the sims romantic and sexual stuff is so nice bc its what i want?? LMAO IDK like the whole hot tub thing you're talking about- puh lease ITS JUST NICE TO SEE OKAY

i'm reading the german section over again and i said aloud "my german friend is so cool" lol (i was saying that to my brothers & i know they don't care LMAO) (& i'm glad the uni zoom call went well!!) so on a form, in german, it could possibily say Einführungsveranstaltungsteilnehmer because you would be a participant to an introductory event? i swear german sounds so cool 😌 but i love reading your german lessons!! it's really interesting, most of the time my brain can't comprehend it tho?? like that word makes sense to you, but i need a translation. like to be able to look at that and know what it says.... its just appealing and seems so cool lol i kinda wanna write something out in german but i feel that google translate will fail me. während googeln "google übersetzen" mein Computer war so verdammt langsam und es fühlte sich einfach wie etwas Gutes auf Deutsch zu sagen. ich bin nicht sicher, welches Wort ist "fucking", aber ich mag es lmao (did it fail me like i thought it would??)

LMAOOO THANK YOU FOR BRINGING UP JUSTIN BC WHILE AT THE RESTURANT THEY PLAYED A JUSTIN SONG AND I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT OF YOU AND THIS STORY😭 lol i was thinking it's depending on your age but not even that either... i really don't know.... but tom's fans are hollanders💀 i would consider myself one? he's the only person i'm really into like that (like a lot lol) so idk lmao (directioners 💔💔the pain is real)

LMAOOO (both of these paragraphs started off with “lmaooo” smh) "i like my men when they look like they are on the brink of death" PLEASE, i don't like pete's blonde hair... i just don't. i'm not sure if i wasn't watching the most recent snls but yea. my mom thinks he looks like trash, but i think he's okay? like he said staten island people just look like trash LMAO and I STILL HAVEN'T SEEN KING OF STATEN ISLAND GIRL I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THAT!! now i'm gonna make plans to watch it lmao, & yes agreed i find pete hot, don't ask why i really couldn't explain it to someone he's just .

my favorite songs from rex are from pony oh my goodness 🥺 anywho i'm gonna go eat cereal (i ended up eating bun and cheese instead) and listen to the Stormzy songs you recommended... aria. aria aria aria. i would like to thank you for introducing me to stormzy i- i don't have any words or any emojis to express HOW GOOD STORMZY IS. i hope he's popular in germany/the uk because i haven't heard of him but GURLLLL

one second - delicious i love it. it's really good. it’s not my favorite from the album, but its great.

superheroes - at first i played the non-explicit one (on accident) and wondered why the words weren't playing but i was reading them in the lyrics??? THIS ONE THOUGH??? IS THE BEST SONG I THINK I'VE EVER HEARD. i am so SO SO into black people empowering songs (like brown skin girl by beyonce) and this song???? PHEW I CRYYYYY ITS SO GOOD.... i was gonna quote some lyrics BUT THERS TOO MANY I LOVE, "i am young, black, beautiful, and brave" "black queen, you're immaculate, it's coming at the world, they ain't ready for your magic yet, and that was never your fault" THAT WAS NEVER YOUR FAULT- I ALMOST CRIED THIS SONG IS SO BEAUTIFUL (i played it twice lol)

lessons is another beautiful one, like its slow and it feels intimate and nurturing and just OO chefs kiss, beautiful . like you can feel the apology and the regret... it’s so good

own it - OWN IT OWN IT OWN IT IS AMAZING!! swear you would catch me dancing to this song, this song is so fucking good i cannot comprehend like this one might be my favorite for real... "it's the way you wind up your waist, i'm so in awe, you never have to worry abt nothing, you know its yours, you know you own it" 🥲 i played it two or three times honestly

rachael's little brother - YES I DID LISTEN TO IT LMAO AND YES I LIKE IT, its a very complex song and it's very layered in terms of emotions i think and i really like that about it. i probably won't listen to it that often, but its really good. i would recommend this song to my "older brother" bc he would just absolutely love this

shut up - i was taking this song seriously (also very good) until i heard him say shu-T up LMAO, this one is good, i probably wouldn't listen to it 24/7 like rachael's little brother but honestly its still fire

before listening to blinded by your grace and vossi bop, i know you brought up the religion bit, i definitely don't mind that, especially because i'm Christian lol and i actually liked that he brought up God in some of his songs like idk i just like it🥰🥰

(i then went to bed after that lol but first thing in the morning i listened to superheroes and... that song is probably my favorite tbh, i was gonna write MORE quotes that i loved from it but, yeah no there's too many. if you want i'll tell you lmao but this is already so long i would just be quoting the whole friggin song)

VOSSI BOP IS A BOP (lol) I CANT EVEN LIE, i love a song that hypes up a dude's girl so the line- i love that my phone decided to fail to load the lyrics, lemme google it, okay the lyric "looking at my girl like what a goddess" i was like AYEEE its honestly just really good. and no one in america says "sauce" like "i've got the sauce" but now i do (thanks to love island and Nas from last season) and now stormzy so (also im gonna watch the music video for superheroes bc it looks great so 😛)

(because this is already so long i feel like i shouldn't finish the rest but . no i'm gonna do it)

now for blinded by your grace pt2 idk why i’m nervous lmaoo PAUSE I'M NOT EVEN DONE WITH THE SONG GIRL THIS SONG IS *chefs kiss* no words, speechless PHEW y'all gon make me start jumping around. why did i not know about stormzy before, he is amazing i- ok yeah i finished the song, all i have to say is that Stormzy is immaclucate. period. i am literally sending his music to all my friends he is..... amazing

you want my song recommendations 🥺🥺 hmm uh okay lol i listen to a lot of old music, whitney houston, marvin gaye, queen, celine dion, i love "more than words" by extreme uhmm okay, but for actual music i listen to on the daily? (this is a lot of different music like.... they do not go together lmao so be prepared) a song about being sad by rex orange county, betty by taylor swift and lover by taylor swift and... most of that album lol, treasure by bruno mars lmao, OOOO and versace on the floor by bruno as well, lazybaby by dove cameron, creep by tlc has been on repeat lol, deja vu by olivia rodrigo (i saw what you said about drivers license and AGREED LMAO but i like deja vu a lot more haha) and two albums that i listen to in general, rare by selena gomez and ungodly hour by chloe x halle 🥰 you don't have to listen to all of them or any of them lol but that's a sense of what i'm into :) so basically everything haha, i'm into literally every single kind of music really so i wasn't too surprised that i enjoyed stormzy :’)

HAHASBSJHAHA your h20 story cracked me up,, like "wow these actors are so dedicated, learning german just for us" 😭 the beauty of overdubbing

once again, math and maths, in my mind maths makes sense because its mathmatics, but saying maths doesn't feel right to me lol, like if i said maths i feel like everyone would look at me like ??? and yea i was taught it as math so its just more natural for me. but yes math/maths is disgusting, easily one of my least favorite subjects so .

mkay. i- the first time i read this i could not contain my laughter when you said the only pollen you know is sex pollen LMAOKOOSHBABJFAJF STOPPP I'M EVEN LAUGHING WRITING THIS,, anyway. wow! that's interesting, my dad (<<< mostly anything else) gets migraines from the sun and the heat and stuff, yesterday (sunday, i was outside for like hours watching my brothers play football, the american kind lol) i was in the sun for like ever and i got a headache😔

summer clothes🥲 i need to go shopping fr fr. for my birthday my mom and dad got me a giftcard like dedicated to a shopping spree and we've yet to go so..... i should bring it up to my mom lol, but!! i went bra shopping (ended up returning literally all of them cuz they honestly didn't work for day to day work? its a long story) and if i could i would walk around in this new "summer bra" i got, i would. it's so fricking cute and its really light fabric (which isn't perfect for my nipples but still) so i don't get hot in it, but that bra and some shorts would be perfect. its the closest thing to being naked so

IS THE BIRD STILL BOTHERING U ARIA, TELL ME NOW ISTG, i laughed really hard that the bird isn't stupid and is really trying to torture you LMAOO like i was rolling, it wants you to suffer, badly

when you said "mensus" it was still close to mens!!! latin speaking queen 😌😌

okay STORYTIME i was reading back your response and started (fake) crying bc i love you lol and my youngest brother (daniel) gon say "oh man, catherine's crying about something we don't care about, again" I--- i swear when i tell you about them they sound awful, but they aren't that bad, just the stuff i say about them is sounds really mean LMAO

but the thing you said about being kind, same, what i always say is: don't be the person that makes people say "i hate people" ya know? like there's no reason to be a jerk or anything.... but its true 🥺🥺🥺🥺 you are really kind and every time i talk to you i would like to personally fly to germany and give you a hug 💖💕💞💗💓💝💖💘

& i'm gonna show my stretch marks some love bc of you 🥺😭 i really hate how men have basically everyone conditioned that you can't love your own body </3 fuck them, y'all beautiful :')

also thanks for what you said :')) you literally are the kindest, sweetest person i think i've ever spoken to and i love you 🥰🥺🥲💓💗

READING YOUR TAGS HAHAHHAHA the spelling errors makes everything so much funnier. once again, i like your german lessons & yea!! i'm gonna play sims after writing this hahah

#catherine's tags are back #i don't think i've told you my name before?? #anyway it's catherine🥰🥰🥰 #i'm typing this on my computer (without emojis) and if i didn't edit this you would be reading shit shite like #heartface and pout and cry LMAO #yeah abt the tattoos #some stuff with my parents i'm like deal with it??? lol #my mom tells me "if there's something you enjoy or you like but i don't have the same opinion on it... why would my (my mom's) opinion matter? #and i love that #like i'm not gonna go and do whatever i want #but if my mom doesn't like that i swear (which isn't true just an example) #its like okay.... #but whatever #and your tattoo ideas sound really cute!! #and yeah @ your parents, i mean you aren't getting something wild #and the tattoo album>>> #i'm gonna look up ariana's butterfly tattoos just so i know what you mean lol #but i'm guessing you don't want something so incredibily simple, but not super like over the top? #correct me if i'm wrong lol #LMAO the tags were in order don't worry ! #and yeah lol ily2 <33 #and once again, again, sorry for this post JSHJS ITS A MESS AND LONG AS HELL #and you don't need to go in order of my post its literally longer than your german compound words #u're fine #also !!! while writing this the birds were chirping outside and i was like 😳 #and one of your fics (i’ve read all of them, i don’t remember lol) that valentine’s day one where y/n had lingerie on (the pancake one lol) #inspired me to buy lingerie #like when i look back on me “growing up” #that fic & basically you lol really helped with that #that made no sense and i don’t know how to make it make sense... but... yeah. like ily

hiiiiiiiiiii <3333

Dear catherine, 😌

(you have said your name before, but it wasn‘t like an introduction or anything i think you were talking about .... was it possibly the incident at the cinema??? And you said something like ‘calm down catherine‘ like you were telling yourself to calm down idkd dkdkkdkd anyway i didn‘t mention it cause i wasn‘t sure if it was an accident or not dkdjd but now i know 😌❤️ Catherine is such a cute and lovely name btw omg and so are your brothers‘s names 🥰

Sorry that I‘m answering this so late, it‘s been an emotional rollercoaster for me since last week but i‘ll get to that in a second lol

Sksklssk girl i haven‘t played sims in like 2 weeks now ekejdkdlldld ok that‘s not that long at all actually but i keep wanting to play but then i end up not playing for whatever reason, so no news about my sims game 😔 but i love the names Liam and Peter and for twins!!! That sounds really nice actually

okay i‘m trying to answer your ask in chronological answer even though i wanted to wait for the depressing stuff and write it at the end or something OKAY so. i thought that i‘d feel so good when i start uni and that i‘ll like... have a purpose in life again and just be happy (cause in the last year i didn‘t do much and i was depressed like half of the time lol).... anyway i kind of feel even worse now? 😭 i think it‘s because in my brain it‘s like: university!!! that means your life will change and it‘ll all be so exciting. and don‘t get me wrong it is exciting butttt..... idk the online thing is so weird cause you‘re not meeting any new people (i‘m introverted anyway but still lol) and it doesn‘t feel like you‘re listening to/talking to actual people cause it feels the same as just watching a video?

also i thought i‘d be busy again but i only have one lecture (90mins) a day and theres one day where i dont have any lectures at all and just one day where i have 3 hours but.... idk i mean i shouldn‘t complain about having so much free time but i just don‘t know what to do all day and in a pandemic there really is nothing to do but i also can‘t relax bc it‘s like during the week and i know i have uni the next day and .... yeah.

There‘s also this one assignment i had to do that took me AT LEAST SIX HOURS AND IM NOT EVEN EXAGGERATING????? so that was the only thing i‘ve been doing besides “going to“ lectures. for this one course we have to read two (really really long) texts (like it literally took me 3 hours to read them) and we‘re supposed to post it on this website that all the professors in our uni use. So after 5 days of anxiety (✌🏼) i posted mine this morning bc last night i realised that i didn‘t even know why i was having anxiety so i just posted mine today. The deadline is tomorrow at 12 and no one except me has posted theirs yet........ so i have anxiety again 🥰 cause idk if i‘m the only one who did it or if i even did it correctly

Edit while i‘m rereading this: my anxiety about uni is a lot better and i‘m not as d*pressed anymore maybe it was just hormones? idk but i‘m better so that‘s good

(I started writing this like 5 hours ago and then i randomly completely forgot lol)

I‘m in a better mood now though so let‘s move on from that (oh wait also, i think i‘m gonna see if i can find a psychiatrist bc with my anxiety symptoms (long story) i need to go to a psychiatrist, and so far i‘ve only gone to like psycholgists and it didn‘t help but i think that‘s just bc i was meant to go to a psychiatrist and not a psychologist so dldjdjsj

n e ways but yes you‘re not alone, ily, things will get better and yes i love you (i‘m not good at this type of thing🥲 but i‘d hug you right now if i could <3)

Yess i think the time difference between est and me is 6hours but gmt is uk time i believe? i think mine is called.... cet? For central european time? I could be completely wrong though lmao

Oof i completely forgot about hollywood, i remember when laura kept posting about it on instagram but i never actually watched it and i definitely won‘t now lmaodkdksjsn

Okay my driving lesson LEBDJDKDK I DID NOT HOOK UP WITH ANYONE AKSJSKSMMLM especially not my 40 or 50 year old driving instructor lol i like her but NOT LIKE THAT, the lesson was really really really good actually and i think i‘ll have my driving test soon, but i don‘t even remember why the anon would have thought that??? Oh wait now i remember okay KEKSKDLDL so during the lesson my instructor was like do you mind if i turn on some music? AND THIS WOMAN TURNED ON ONE DIRECTION I LOVE HER so i made a post about it and i said something about the song up all night and i guess i phrased it in a .... idk in a dumb way 💀 so the anon made a joke that i stayed up with my driving instructor all night and NO. No.

Wait did i read that right? YOU WERE ARIEL ON STAGE? SIALDBDJDKSLMSBDKDMDMDKDJSLSMDJFJJEDMBFEKLEFBJDLDVSIDLESKSKWKDKDJDOWNYUEKWNDUWLNSUFLWVSUDLEHDOENSIDBEISBEHENJELBSIEMWUDNRIW KB WOBE JO ON SBEUU HIII S HWS LV W ICH US KB okay this keyboard smash is getting out of hand but uh please do elaborate on that 💘😌???? Like you can‘t just drop that information and not say more??? I forgot if you‘re in like your school‘s drama group (is that a thing? lol idk anything about acting) or in an independent group? Either way - ARIEL that is so fucking cool

Your brothers loooooool, no i get it though obviously you love them and stuff but esp at their age children are so annoying so good luck with them 😭😭😭lmao

Yeah “anyway i imagine being an only child is really calming.. like you have time to yourself and its just you and your parents 😌“ yeah just me and my parents who constantly fight 🥰 lmao no i like being an only child, like i cannot imagine having siblings but i feel like if i had siblings i would be saying that i can‘t imagine being an only child so? but i do think it‘s quite different like i‘m trying to imagine having siblings and WHAT that‘s just so different omg i‘ve never really thought about it like properly ???

I saw a tik tok the other day that was like “sometimes i forget that my siblings have a life of their own. like i see them as side characters in my life“ and even though i can‘t relate obviously i felt that. lol, like i can really imagine how it feels idk what i‘m talking about like shut the fuck up, daria

(also my actual name is daria not aria but i dont like it, and also i wanted to be more anonymous on tumblr so now i‘m aria lmao. pls don‘t mention it though cause no one knows except for you and mel (peterbenjiparker) dkdkdkdnkdnd. but i‘m starting to identify with the name cause everyone keeps calling me that looool😭😭😭 (but i like the name, more than daria anyway? well it also depends on the accent, cause the way germans say daria is okay. the was Americans say it is also okay, but some of my family in England are from the north of england and i don‘t like how they say my name 💀 no offence to them(?) but yeah pls don‘t mention the name in your ask cause the chance of people seeing it is higher then (or if you want to say something about it just send a separate ask and i just won‘t post it (IDK what you‘d want to say about my name but yeah just in case slsldlldmsndnsns)

I‘m loving falcon and winter soldier so much but when i was watching an episode the week before last week (?) my laptop broke😭😭😭😭 during the scene where the dora milaje came at the end my laptop just shut down? And it had these lines all over the screen and i had to bring it to the shop where i bought it and they said it‘ll take 6-8 weeks to repair 💔💔💔 but at least it‘ll be for free, cause if i brought it back to apple it would cost like 400€ (i think that‘s nearly 500$) so yeah. but it sucks cause now i‘m “going to uni“ on a really old rusty laptop and on my phone which kinda sucks. oh yeah and also i can‘t watch anything on there 😭 i definitely want to watch wandavision but it‘ll have to wait🤧

Yessss you should def get your GED! I googled and I‘m still not entirely sure what it is dldks but from how you described it- YES!!!!!!

Idk if you know this? Like no idea if I‘ve told you this already (hmmm wait i feel like we talked about it actually?) anyway i was originally gonna go study in England, but for loads of reasons I ended up staying in Germany and I‘m def happy with my decision, but I definitely want to go to England sometime even if it‘s just for six months or maybe for my masters or something? And (obviously everyone is different) but i think everyone should go abroad and live in a different country once in their life, no matter if it‘s for school or what, and even if it‘s just for a few weeks. But i think that‘s something that you‘d never ever forget! And combining that with your acting/theatre??? You really would be living the dream 💘💘😌

how about burgers, chips (fries), and a large drink? any time next week works for me, should i pick you up?— sounds good see you soon 🥰🥰🥰

i used to be one of the people who‘d just do motherlode motherlode motherlode and just... what did i do? Why did i do that??? But not anymore lol. Like I said i haven‘t played sims in a few weeks but i‘ve been watching a few legacy challenge let‘s plays and usually i play with the aging off. So my sims just don‘t age 💀 but i could (should) turn aging on so that it stays exciting and i have limited time and everything. and once i get bored with my current sims i can just make them have kids and continue playing as their children when they get older- like recently i remembered that i haven‘t played the acting career in ages? and i haven‘t had a shop in ages? and i think you can even become a vet right??? like those are definitely some things i want to do in the next weeks!!! Also yes sksksjs i have a few hundred hours on sims as well (if not thousands 😭) it was just that one household that i‘d been playing with for 24hrs

AND GIRL SSKSKJD THE UNIVERSITY THING HAPPENED TO ME TOO, it was a while ago so i don‘t remember what degree and what job it was about but i made my sim study something for aaaaaages so she‘d get a better job from the beginning (you know what i mean like get in at a higher level)...... and i apparently studied the wrong thing cause i didn‘t get any benefits from studying and still had to start at level 1 and shit 🥴🥲

Oh also (this was like 2 weeks ago) Enisa and Michael did take in Michael‘s daughter and i think Enisa currently even has a higher/better relationship with the daughter than Michael but um💀💀💀 also i was hoping (since michael and enisa married (in their back yard i think lol) that the daughter (i forget what her name is😭) would have enisa as her step mom? Like you know how you can see the relationship and it says daughter or son or sister.. and i was hoping that it would say step mom but it doesn‘t say anything 🥲 but in my mind (and if the sims had proper family relations) she is her step mom😌 also Leo is a teenager now???? I mean I aged him up lol dkdk he was being too annoying as a toddler but i don‘t like children so i aged him up twice in one day and now he‘s a teen, but that means he can look after his half sister when she becomes a toddler which is good (the game recognises them as siblings tho even if they‘re just half siblings? why can‘t they have step family members in the sims🥲) okay i‘ve annoyed you enough with sims ✋🏼

I‘ve been a bit sick these past few days and now i‘m getting a headache so i have to finish this response tomorrow 😭😭😭 </3

.

It‘s not tomorrow, it‘s 3 hours later but i‘m better lol

oooff when sims are ungrateful and won‘t woo woo (lol i like that) cause they‘re too tired like?? Be grateful that you‘re not living with your parents anymore 🙄 no okay dkdkdkdl idk if you play with mods (i don‘t) but i know there is a mod (or it‘s part of a mod idk maybe wicked whims?) where you can adjust the percentage of how risky a normal woo woo is, like you still click woo woo (3dksksks okay i‘ll say woohoo again— wait is that what’s it called? 😭) but there‘s like a 25% chance that your sim can still get pregnant just like in real life there‘s always a chance of getting pregnant even if you‘re using protection (just not 25% lmao) but yeah i personally don‘t play with mods sksk and you can always just click try for baby but it would be cool if you could add stuff like risky woohoo to the game without mods (i have no idea how to download mods and i play sims on a really really old laptop and sims is literally tje only thing that works on it anyway so—) i repeat my words from earlier: okay i‘ve annoyed you enough with sims ✋🏼

okay i‘m so sorry i‘m gonna watch fast & furious 1 now cause i need to watch f&f 1-5 until the 30th of april cause they‘re only on netflix til then (i mean i could watch them somewhere else but the quality is never as good) so i will finish this tomorrow after all😭

it is now 1 am, i finished the film, can feel a new obsession coming up again (i always have these f&f obsessions for six months before and after a new film comes out)

THE GOOGLE TRANSLATE wkekdjdj tbh it sounds like someone is speaking with some kind of foreign accent i guess that‘s probably because it just is a direct translation and so anyway slsjsj i don‘t know if you asked me what the word fucking is in german? like idk cause the translation is a bit weird but in case you asked lol sidjsjs theres not really a good translation like we just say fuck for fuck lmao, i don‘t know if you typed in fucking in google translate and it came out as verdammt? cause that means damn (or damned sksjjs) ummm yeah idek if/what you asked so imma move on🤧

I‘m not gonna comment on what you said about every stormzy song cause you already said all the important things but SKSKSJSJSKNSNDBDUDOENWBSLSKKHSULSLSKSBSJSKSK I WAS SMILING SO HARD WHEN I READ YOUR RESPONSE FOR THE FIRST TIME BECAUSE AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH finally i know someone who loves him as much as i do 💘💘💘 also since you brought it up, i‘m pretty sure he‘s considered the most successful UK rapper or if not then at least top 3 so he‘s defffffffffinitely big in the uk, in germany more and more people are listening to uk rap too but not as much stormzy cause theyre dumb apparently 🙄 but anywY i‘m sooooo sooo happy that you like him. i think hith came out end of 2019 (i could be wrong but i think it came out on the 13th of december so (in a european way) you‘d write the date: 13.12 and obviously i don‘t KNOW this but i can definitely imagine that he chose that date because ACAB and yes, Michael. Yes. But he hasn‘t made too much music since then so i hope he‘s working on some new stuff 🤞🏼

Also i ordered the stormzy poster😌 also a nicki minaj one bc i decided i‘m gonna have one wall with red-ish posters (i already have two kinda red ones) and one with blue/green-ish posters (already have two) and i can add stormzy to the blue one and nicki to the red one, but i think that‘s it cause if my walls are tooo full it could look cluttered? I‘m not sure how that type of thing works lmao but my room is generally untidy so i don‘t want the walls to look unorganised too so i think that‘s it for now

I really want to finish this now but my brain is getting kinda slow and i need to sleep soon so this will have to wait till later after all 🥺🥴 (not that it makes and difference to you bc you‘ll see this whenever i post it buttttt i wanted you to know that i want to talk to you again but with my slow brain i‘m just taking too long to do it in one day😭😭😭 and i‘m so busy tomorrow hmm but i‘m sure i‘ll have 30 minutes to finish this then <3)

Okay wait I‘m so dumb I didn‘t realise I‘d nearly answered everything i could have posted this yesterday 😭😭

Oooohh that summer bra sounds so nice like if i was confident enough i literally would just wear a top that resembles a bra (or really is a bra lol) cause my tiddies always be looking amazing i‘m just insecure about my stomach sometimes 🙄🙄🙄 but recently i‘ve been loving myself more and more tbh 😌

also i hope you can go shopping for some nice clothes soon ✨😌

I‘ll be honest I haven‘t listened to your song recs YET but only because i wanna take my time with them and i‘ve been so busy and slso AJ tracey‘s album came out last week and I haven‘t listened to that one yet either so ekdkdj (he‘s also a uk rapper like quite popular and successful as well, but i feel like i‘m not gonna like his album cause whenever i‘m looking forward to an album it ends up being really bad and the albums where you weren‘t expecting it turn out to be bangers.... so yeah but i‘ll let you know when i listen to your songs!!!! :)

Omg i keep having to scroll up all the way to see the next thing you said so sorry if I completely miss some of the things you said😭😭

So when you sent this the bird was still bothering me oh my FUCK DKDLDMMDMDMD but now i‘ve been going to bed at like 1-2am so the bird is probably still asleep lool

Okay and for the rest of your ask my response is: 💘💖❣️💚❣️💛❣️💛💕💞❤️💓💟💞💕💕💖💘💝💟💟🧡❤️🧡💞💛💚💓💚💚💚❣️🧡💖💘🧡💝🧡💕💘🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥰🥺🥺💘💘💘💘💘 (okay that looked cuter in my head i don‘t really like the green hearts dldkkdksndnd)

[txdoroki]

heyo ˙˚ʚ(´◡`)ɞ˚˙ omg i love ur account, ur literally my favourite person on this app sfngnbodmv ur posts make me so happy. basically i want to start writing drabbles and fics and stuff so i was just wondering where 2 start & how u got started :)

hi! aww tysm :,) that means a lot!

well, i started by making a post asking people for requests (as i started as a request writing page, not really that way anymore because it’s easier to not get burnt out for me if i do the stuff i genuinely want to write!) and i used all of the tags i could.

(if youre planning on doing mha writing, bakugou and todoroki content generally does the best. the first 3 tags you use, your content will show up under tagged when you search the tag in specific, so i suggest doing bakugou x reader, todoroki x reader, and whatever else as your first three for your starting request post!)

if you aren’t planning on doing requests, i suggest maybe an intro post. like “hi! i’m (name) and im a writer! here are the fandoms i’ll be writing for, and a few things about me!”

try and have your first writings be consistent, it doesn’t matter that much but it’s good to have content for ppl to read rather than literally one post and it’s an intro. if people see the intro, they will prolly click on your account to see your writing and such. so, imo it’s important to have some writing to begin with

i’ve noticed, that using more tags doesn’t necessarily = more notes! the first few matter the most, and after that, it can help to do the category and such

let’s say i wrote a bakugou fluff. i’d use these tags: bakugou x reader, bakugou imagine, bakugou fluff, bakugou katsuki, mha bakugou- give or take a few! you can find examples under my MOST RECENT writing posts, as i did different experiments with it and the more useful your tags are the better. my “if you came into their room in the middle of the night” post was the experiment, and it turned out that i was right, more tags ≠ more interaction

on that note, INTERACT WITH PEOPLE. this isn’t against anyone who doesnt like interacting, but it can help build relationships with followers! if you’re comfortable with this, you can open your asks box so people can say stuff (you don’t have to have anons on but it can be nice for ppl who are shy/dont want their acc out yk)! if you get anon hate, just block the anon if you want. or dont respond.

also, it’s rlly cool to get a few mutuals! i’d love to be your mutual if you want to, just lmk your account whenever you start posting! sometimes i make mutual posts asking for mutuals, you can do something like that if you would like

my first ever oneshot thing i wrote, was one i rlly remember writing! that might not be the same for my viewers, but i usually remember someone by the first thing i’ve seen by them. first impressions matter, so try and figure out how you wanna be seen! ofc don’t fake being someone you’re not, but it might be confusing to ppl if your first impression doesn’t match with how you act the rest of the time!

your first post usually sets the tone for your blog, or at least the first one that gets you your audience. if you, in your first post that gains you followers, say that you’ll be writing for danganronpa, and then instead write for mha, everyone would kinda be like. what? i thought you were a danganronpa writer??? ya know

BE SURE TO INCLUDE GENERAL TRIGGER WARNINGS ON POSTS THAT NEED THEM. ADD THE TOPIC ITS WARNING ABOUT TOO. EVERYONE WILL APPRECIATE IT BECAUSE IT IS JUST A NICE THING TO DO PLEASE DO THAT!!

i suggest making a navigation page (like my pinned post) and a masterlist (you can do all your writing in one or even seperate masterlists for each character, whatever you’d like)! it can really help to have a spot to go and be able to find all of the writing you’ve done without endless scrolling! if you need a tut on how to add links to posts, im sure theres a tut on youtube!

A REALLY HELPFUL THING TO DO IS WHENEVER YOURE MOTIVATED WRITE LIKE FIVE THINGS SO WHEN YOU DONT FEEL LIKE WRITING, YOU HAVE POSTS! fr tho, ppl usually wont mind if you arent super active. if they do, theyre being dumb!

posting consistently CAN help your posts reach more ppl, but if you can only post every now and then, it isnt really a problem! don’t stress it if you’re too busy/dont have a schedule, it wont kill your account

tl:dr;

-add trigger warnings on things when needed

-make a navi page (not needed)

-if you’re motivated, write stuff to post later

-first impressions matter

-mutuals!

-less tags can work more, but i’ve also seen a lot of tags work good as well

-INTERACT WITH PEOPLE

-don’t say you’ll do things just for followers. they aren’t just a number, they’re actual people

how i started in five steps:

1. i made a post that was like “hey! im mack and i want to start doing writing requests! do you guys have any?”

2. i did a few posts then was like ah fuck i need a masterlist, so i made that and then made an about me with random facts i thought of and such. (also make sure tou put your pronouns in your bio so ppl arent confused!)

3. i did more posts and started gaining, but didn’t really mind it. i kind of just vibed, cause the numbers dont determine how good of a writer you are, so i focused on working on my writing style and such! i kinda ghosted the whole blog for a week straifht beside from queued reblogs, but came back later when i had inspo! it’s good not to run your brain dry

4. i redid my whole blog, made it pretty! its rlly motivating to me to have a nice blog, but it isnt required! i made an organized navigation page, and started focusing on getting my reach back. (btw, prime posting time is at like midnight!) be sure to put rules and boundaries on your page as well, so people do not end up crossing one that you didn’t state.

5. i reminded myself that i can do things other than my blog when i’d get a little too obsessive over it, and that it wasn’t going anywhere! don’t feel pressured to post a LOT. only post when you want to and can. don’t put responsibilities like health aside just for your blog.

hope this was helpful <3

[writeiolite]

i’m trying to pick up writing again. i used to write when i was younger but it was the cringe type. i wouldn’t use paragraph breaks and my grammar was off. now i’m older and don’t know how to actually write something good T-T. do you have any tips? specifically on characterization. i really respect and love you because yours always turns out good.

the cringe type.... we have all been there✊😔 i am... still there sometimes KSNDNSJ

i’m rly rly flattered ur asking me tho omg bc i’m definitely still learning and my technique isn’t the best so 🥺 thank you so much for this (and reading my stuff!!!) wow. i love u too pls this makes me so honored and happy and flattered and wowowo i frl don’t deserve thIS AAAAKAKENSNSBDNS

so lemme say that in no way do i think my methods are superior to someone else’s!! i don’t want to come off as some arrogant writer that believes they know all the ins and outs to writing bc honestly... unless ur a professionally paid writer with a career for writing then we’re all just some tumblr bloggers on the same path and probably going to end up doing smth other than writing later on LOL. so pls take this all with a grain of salt and pls lmk if i come up arrogant or smth bc i don’t want to and i’ll work on wording myself differently!!

for characterization, i sometimes do tiny analyses. so if a character has done action A and action B, i put them in a mental venn diagram to figure out what the reason behind them was. is it a response to an external or internal factor? is there a consistent trait underlying one or both actions? how have the characs changed since these actions? what are the changes?

i’m big on asking myself questions bc then i get a deeper understanding of who i’m writing for — like solving a mystery case or something. i do that for hq characters and my reader/oc characters ^^ it rly helps get away from the stereotypical tropes (like shittykawa) that people use bc u can make the character yours with diverse responses and stay true to the canon. it also helps get away from writing characters as foils to one another, although there are cases where that’s unavoidable

u guys already know that i use astrology in my writing so.. that’s a thing AHAH. i try to figure out which planet, house, transit, aspects, asp patterns, etc would be most influential during certain scenarios and fics so thats always helped me have some originality with characterization.

and another thing is childhood!! not just <10 y/o but even teenage years. i think abt that stuff and how my own influences me. like there are things in my childhood that occurred that ik made me who i am today (ex: hardass narcissistic phase -> being a lot more appreciative + humble for what i have + my efforts). so characters are the same too! if there’s even a small mention of smth that happened in their past, u can use it to map out its impacts.

even no impact is impact. did they not learn from it? are they ignoring it on purpose? are they stagnant?

another thing i can think of that i do is maybe mbti? not too much tho, only with characters i’m rly familiar with.

and last thing is events! whether it’s taking place in a real world setting or a made up one, there are events that go around and shape characters. kamino ward for bnha or new technology being released in the 2010s for hq. things like that seem so small and are never considered when you can rly take advantage of them. ik i’ve experienced a diff life than some of my older friends bc of the events that went on when i was growing up vs their events (same for ppl much younger than me). so with every character being different, u can take their responses to these events, find their foundation, and use them!

i hope some of this helps and if not i can try to explain it better ^^” again, there are so many ways to characterize and there is NO RIGHT WAY!! and this is just the right way for me ♡ if you guys have any tips u wanna share to help me or this anon out then pls do!! i’d love to improve my writing and lately i’ve been feeling my progress slow so ㅠㅠ ♡ anything and everything is appreciated~~ 

[elijahfitz]

and introduction.

meet elijah.

hey guys! im lina! im 18 and im in the cst timezone. im currently a freshman in college and ive also been rping for like 6 years now ( i started on the neopets chat boards. if thats not an embarrassing fun fact idk what is ) but i havent rped since this summer since school was and still is kicking my ass. im really into musical theater, marvel & dc, and disney! i also used to be a lifeguard at a great wolf lodge for 2 years so if u want any funny stories about stupid children, or even just wanna be friends, lmk! im also SUPER sorry this intro is so late. i was gonna do it yesterday but then my friends wanted to hang and it kinda went downhill from there. im actually posting this like 20 min before i have a lab practical so i wont be able to reply until late tonight, but like this post to plot or anything!

some fun facts abt elijah:

he was adopted when he was around 3-4? he was abandoned and left on the back of a merchant cart headed to corona, where he was then discovered and then put into the local orphanage since no one was sure where he came from or who left him. all he had was a stuffed bear (named wooly), a basket of water and fruits to eat, and a letter that explained that:

his name was elijah

he was 2 (born on february 28th)

his parents couldnt care for him, so they hoped he would be found by a kind soul who could either take care of and love him, or else get him to someone who could

they loved him and only left him in the hopes that he would have a better life

he lived in the orphanage for almost 2 years and the few months before the 2nd anniversary of his arrival, rapunzel & eugene visited the orphanage that eugene grew up in and fell in love w/ eli, promptly adopting him soon after. he barely remembers anything about his abandonment and time in the orphanage, but always wanted to find his birth parents and let them know how he turned out. he kept the bear and basket in his room but carries the letter around with him in his wallet wherever he goes.

his full name is elijah frederic fitzherbert. he was given the middle name frederic in honor of his grandfather.

but, he much rather prefers eli. doesnt mind formalities but insists on people who know him to call him by his nickname. except he HATES being called “highness” bc he thinks it sounds stupid. he wont get upset per se if u keep referring to him as “your highness” but he will get annoyed

he very much wants to fulfill his role as “corona’s golden boy” by contributing back to his people. he worries for the kingdom more than he worries for himself and is always trying to prove that he is worthy of being a prince rather than just some random kid who got lucky enough to get adopted. most of his days are spent doing modest favors and helping out the townspeople or visiting the villages surrounding the kingdom.

when he’s in the castle you can almost always find him in the kitchen! boi loves to bake and cook. he loves the way food can bring joy to everyone. he often makes goods to give to the townspeople or the kids at the orphanage, where he volunteers at least every 2 weeks when hes not busy w prince stuff.

has an acute fear of disappointment. he feels so much pressure to prove his worth that came from growing up thinking if he did anything wrong he’d be sent back to orphanage, esp since his parents had another child. they wouldn’t want or need him anymore. he mostly got over this when he broke a vase when he was 12 and tried to run away from home, except he fell out the tree that he used to climb out his window and broke his leg lmao. his parents assured him that no matter what he did they would still love him and never abandon him, and his dad also taught him how to climb trees and roofs without dying (much to his mom’s chagrin). even tho hes pretty much over it, it kinda lingers subconsciously. thus, he overcompensates in everything he does and gets overly anxious about small problems

growing up he thought the stories that his dad told him about his past were so cool, despite the fact that he would almost always only hear those stories when he was being taught lessons of what he shouldnt do. he used to run around pretending to be flynn rider and his dad played along, planning play heists for them to do together (think scott & cassie in that one scene from ant man and the wasp) but they stopped when eli hit that age where he thought it was embarrassing to play w his dad. but, it really helped him bond w eugene and help him work on his coordination bc eli is CLUMSY AF

eli legit trips over nothing at least twice a day.

he bonded w his mom through art tho, which eventually turned into aesthetic desserts and meals! thats another reason why he loves baking and cooking so much.

when his 1st sibling was born when he was 5 at first he was jealous. he didnt get much attention at the orphanage due to the fact that there were so many kids and he was just starting to get used to the idea of having parents didnt have tons of kids always trying to win their affection and attention. he thought having a little sibling was the worst thing in the world and would hide from his parents bc if they couldnt find him they couldnt send him away. he hated his sibling.

until he met them. the second he saw their chubby face he was hooked. he swore that he would do anything and everything for them. and that continued when his parents adopted his other siblings as well. he absolutely adores them and acts like the protective older bro role

thankfully, with such a large age gap eli never rlly had to go through any of those petty squabbles that siblings usually have. he was always pretty protective of them tho and would fight when he thought they were being reckless and dumb out of his own fear that if they got hurt he would be an awful big brother (again, fear of disappointment)

he loves to travel bc his mom would always take him to these extravagant kingdoms and on these amazing sightseeing trips

this boy is hopeless when it comes to love. i can imagine lots of ppl liking him on top of all the ppl throwing themselves at him bc royal, but him being completely oblivious and thinking that no one likes him.

he had rlly bad ADD as a kid but its gotten better as hes grown. he still occasionally struggles w executive functioning tho and always gets rlly frustrated when he cant focus or remember

like i said earlier, clumsy af. no coordination. the only athletic ability he ever had was horse riding and running

that said he has a horse named may (short for mayonnaise. dont ask

he likes music a lot. prob learned piano at a young age

he probably is at the party bc royals? idk

EDIT: although (currently) unknown to eli, his true birth mother is maleficent. when eli was 2, his birth father took him away from her and had her suppress eli’s natural born powers. his father realized he was unfit to care for him, so he was the one who abandoned eli.

wanted connections!!

obv his parents and siblings? i mean cmon

one ( or both???? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) of his birth parents!!!!! they dont have to know that eli is their son or mayb they do and are too scared to tell him, but being trapped together will eventually make it revealed

childhood friends! people he met when he traveled w his mom or met at royal social functions? i rlly also want friends that he would hang w at all the royal galas and stuff and they would go do dumb stuff like look sneak out and look for secret passages of make bets of who could dump more crab cakes into the stuffy duchess’ purse when she wasnt looking

people who know him solely through his family

someone who likes eli and eli legit has no clue, no matter how much they flirt and drop hints

people who hate eli! or even just dislike him, which makes him upset bc he doesnt like the idea that there are ppl who dont like him in the world. mayb bc sometimes he gets super highstrung when things arent going how they should b and he like lashed out at them once or something. maybe they hate his parents and on principle hate him. idk

someone who was w eli in the orphanage

past relationships? i feel like hes never rlly had a bad breakup tho, its just that they prob just didnt work out. hes also bi so they can b any gender. hes still looking for his otp

idk, legit anything. send me those plots man