#if u wanna interpret it like that too!!
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An old friend
#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#aj art#marcille donato#chilchuck#Something something they both think an elven lifespan is too long#But for different reasons#She thinks it’s unfair that only elves live that long and wants to make everyone else live that same amount of time#He thinks it’s too much time for someone to live and is very content with the lifespan he has#This isn’t meant to be romantic but if u wanna interpret it that way knock urself out#I just really like their friendship#I like that after [spoilers] he’s the one who takes care of her hair for her#And that his lifespan makes her shut down when it’s brought up#And that he’s the first one to tell her that a thousand years is way too much time#Oufhhghfhrhfhfh marchil my marchils
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もう一回、もう一回
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#fushiguro megumi#yuji itadori#itafushi#ryoumen sukuna#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#gomen its hina posts self indulgent art hours#this is fr me first and foremost. any1 else liking it is just a bonus in my eyes#i may not be able to animate but i am so happy with these regardless i think they turned out great :') treat fr Me#rolling girl megumi u mean so much 2 me suddenly#fun fact ! actually the first vocaloid song i ever listened to. stumbled across an audio post on this very tumblr dot com#and it forever changed the course of my taste in music#so it alr has a soft spot in my heart fr tht reason but Also the lyrics Also th whole deal w wowaka and Now w megumi.....#rolling girl u have become too powerful#anyway in th context of canon n megumi choosing to live i am choosing to interpret the song the less depressing way#where the boy represents a saving grace rather than being a personification of miku's char's demons convincing her to end it#n the ending being her deciding to stop fighting on her own n instead accept help from those around her#but i did also want to pay homage 2 the interpretation of him representing her inner demons#so i have redraws of both yuuji And sukuna as the boy#choose ur own adventure if u will#clutches heart why does it fit so WELL what cosmic force decided tht miku and jjk should overlap at all i just wanna talk#clearly something has it out fr me
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yet another cartoonishly evil thing i can explain I CAN SHUT UP!!!
first of all, this show is an exaggeration of itself at this point. we should just acknowledge that before anything else. but i do have actual things to say about this lol
let's be clear here, this is an absolute batshit decision from the writers. the song is pure camp. but the rest of it has some actual grounding.
penguin wants power, respect, and adoration. all things lacking from all the times he's been underestimated. he saw an opportunity to take gotham (fortune favors the bold!) and he took it. he grabbed power. he can force respect. he can be the sole provider of ammunition in his now ruined city.
now adoration on the other hand... he cannot grab or force that.
he's not talking about love here. he's talking about adoration. he may NEED love, but he's acting on his WANT.
ed's right here (i mean he shouldn't have said it about HIMSELF on the penguin-suffers-but-ultimately-gets-whatever-he-wants show) and it's a DIRECT result of his mother spoiling him.
oswald craves love but doesn't know how to give it. this was at the core of his and edward's initial conflict, this is something ed saw in him. he puts himself first. he grew last season in terms of martin, in terms of edward, but they are the exceptions to the rule. he valued his own revenge over his friendship with butch.
and so he starts season 5 with no friends, by his own hands. and it's different from all the way back in season one. he only had himself before. now he has less than nothing. he only wanted power then. now it's all he has. and it's corrupting. "i was not a good friend, to you or to anyone, it's why i'm alone." he's spiraling and everyone in gotham is collateral.
...speaking of adoration, let's talk about ed.
the reason oswald "fell for" ed was because he saw someone who would give himself entirely to him. ed is always desperate for the approval of authority figures. it's why he prioritizes finding "an enemy or a teacher" when he's trying to claim his identity. it's why he attaches himself to both oswald and lee.
if ed hadn't caught onto the cruelty and betrayal of trust with isabella, penguin would've used him the same way.
ed craves love but doesn't know how to recieve it. this was also present in their initial conflict. the reason ed shot os is because he couldn't face the truth of being in love with him. of being just like the man who took his girlfriend's life (how many partner's love interests has he himself tried to kill again?) the most repressed man in gotham city 💚
#i hope u guys understand i would NEVER defend a character's evil and i hate softening traits for fandom#we just need to talk about this DECISION FROM THE WRITERS#i like to have death of the author and look at a work as a whole and have my own interpretations#<- this is why i hated gotham as a show while it was airing i saw too much from the writers lmao#I NEED TO FIX THIS WHILE IT'S HAPPENING#idk im sick of this post i just wanna watch the ep now#oswald cobblepot#riddlebird#nygmobblepot#edward nygma#gotham fox#gotham tv
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It's a time-honoured tradition- every time Sam comes across Izzy (and Ed) in their travels, he asks Izzy to marry him. And every time, Izzy turns him down.
At this point, Sam is asking more for the sake of it than any belief Izzy will ever say yes, a remnant of childhood dedication touched with 30 years of heartbreak and regret- though even now, a small part of him still holds out hope. Sam's promises have only got more extravagant over the years, from a job as his first mate, to a captaincy, a fleet at his command, a whole fucking island if that's what Izzy wants- but he knows it isn't though, not really. If Izzy was ever going to agree to marry him, to leave his life and go with Sam, it wouldn't be for anything Sam could offer him. Izzy never did care for flashy shows of wealth, for a ship or to be captain. The only thing that ever mattered to him was loyalty given, and loyalty shown in return.
It all comes to a head after Stede left and came back, after Izzy lost a toe, lost his leg. Sam hasn't seen him since before things with Ed started to really slide off the rails, before stress permanently set into the lines of Izzy’s face. So, when he sees a dishevelled man with a hoof for a leg in a no-name port, he doesn't even consider the idea that he might know him. It's only when he turns towards him, and Sam catches a glance at those oh too familiar tattoos, he realises this is Izzy, his Izzy, that stands before him.
Knowing Izzy's discomfort with pity, he doesn't treat him any differently than he would in years gone by, positioning himself in Izzy's line of sight before approaching and sweeping him up into a bone crushing hug.
“Israel-goddamn-Hands!” he exclaims, as Izzy grumbles back a begrudging “Samuel-fucking-Bellamy”, a tradition almost as old as their friendship itself. Izzy might not hug him back, but he can’t keep the corner of his mouth from twitching, just for a second.
(If Sam holds Izzy a little tighter and a little longer than usual, well. That's his business)
By the time Sam lets go, most of the crew has appeared in the town square, drawn in by the commotion. They may have given Izzy his leg and welcomed him as one of them, but still there’s an underlying tension, with nobody quite ready to set aside everything that happened before the Kraken. Seeing him cosying up to an unknown man sets everyone on edge, unsure whether to come to their first mate’s aid, or to assume that they've been betrayed once again.
When Ed sees that the yelling was Sam, his hand goes tense where it's held in Stede's. He knows the routine, has seen it more times than he can count, but as he watches them part he realises that this is the first time in a long time he's unsure of what Izzy's response will be.
Knowing that something’s different, knowing that Izzy's feeling vulnerable already, Sam doesn't go for the same flashy proposal he’s been giving for years. He doesn't promise Izzy the world, he doesn't cause a scene (or, any more of a scene than he already has, anyway). He looks at the fractured man in front of him, takes his face in his hands, and says the exact same thing to him he said when they were little more than boys. “Israel, I have to ask you. I know what you'll say, but I have to try. Come with me. Marry me and sail away with me. I'll keep you safe”
And Izzy… hesitates. He glances over at Ed, at Stede, and says to Sam “...We’re staying in port for a week. Ask me again then”
That's the moment Sam knows there is something deeply, horribly, wrong. He's not just looking at an Izzy who got seriously injured in a fight and is struggling to cope, this is something so much bigger than that- and that Ed has something to do with it. Izzy wouldn't even be considering leaving if he didn't. Whether it was negligence or something more sinister, Sam doesn't yet know, but he intends to find out.
#i feel like the little paragraph about the crew is real clunky and out of place but i wanted some kind of establishment of where those#dynamics are at. its important that the crew is something for izzy to consider in his decision; but also that their relationship isnt so#solid he would stay for them alone; yknow?#im sorta aiming for a s2e5 era but like. early in those themes. he cant be all sorted yet i need him to be struggling#anyway this is part of a much larger scenario in my head that im never ever doing anything with but i wrote THIS bit in a daze in like. jun#and i got thinking about it again and i think?? it holds its own as a 'hey think about THIS' snippet. idk you decide#youre welcome to interpret this as solo bellhands but in my head it Has morphed into sam/izzy/ed/stede#because i cant not put edizzy in things any more. izzy has two hands#i also think the comedy potential of one of your boyfriends HATING your other boyfriend is gold. 10/10 dynamic#stede is mostly along for the ride in this but also i think they need him#aaaaand. the sam/ed bracket i think can only be closed in exceptional circumstances. i think they 'hate' each other too much#...which is WHY someones getting kidnapped!!! yay#anyway its all irrelevant because ill never write it out. i can do silly chill things but thatll require work#nyxtalks#ofmd#our flag means death#izzy hands#israel hands#sam bellamy#bellhands#i wanna also say. the general concept of repeated sam proposals has been floating around my head forever#it used to be a more silly thing like i referenced at the start but. s2 gave me angsty feelings i guess#i cant not have izzy have feelings for ed right now which inherently adds layers to Any bellhands scenarios i think.#but yeah. its a Classic Bellhands vibe for me. sam seeing izzy at sea or on shore and asking him to marry him (again)#i like to do this with jackie too. i think i just want that man to be obnoxiously desired#(theres also layers of my personal hornigold era lore built into this but i hope it holds up without u knowing it. tldr. sam lost izzy by#being an idiot n fumbling the bag. thats what matters. izzy went with ed and sams been trying to fix it ever since)#i probably should have readmore'd this but i didnt think it was Quite long enough. or had a good break point. sorry <3
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Hi, hello, just came here to say that I love your fic "trending in Japan". I was wondering if you had headcanons regarding Kenji or Emi or interpersonal relationships and stuff. Many hugs for you.
hi hello, thank you for the encouragement and hugs! After some thought ive realized I do in fact have some hcs about some of the character dynamics in the movie as well as just kenji himself, cause hes captivated my entire brain:
Kenji & Emi
Emi does not have teeth but she does inexplicably have a teething phase. kenji is forced to hide all his (salvaged) fancy cars in the garage bc the corvette's already been chewed to hell and his heart is gonna give out if he has to watch any more classics get wrecked
he reads her bedtime stories. A lot of aesop's fables, because theyre short and fun and hes trying to raise his monster daughter with good morals. emi goes hogwild for these but its unclear if she actually understands what hes saying; kenji's pretty sure she just likes the silly voices he uses for different characters
they go flying together! they go first thing in the morning before breakfast - it helps kenji shake off the grogginess of sleep and emi gets to stretch her wings. shes not able to go very far for very long initially, but as she grows and gets those cardio gainz she almost gets to be quicker than him. they have races and play air tag :)
while she doesnt have the vocal range to speak english herself, it becomes clear that emi does understand it well. (kenji also develops an ear for her chirping/squawks, though body language & facial expressions play a big part in communication for both of them) during her (much later) rebellious phase she'll simply pretend not to know what's being said when kenji is telling her to do something she doesn't wanna do, which frustrates him to no end
Kenji
developed a pretty massive chip on his shoulder after moving to the states. it wasn't just bitterness over his dad staying behind, though that was a part of it. this is canon but he was picked on in school for "how [he talked], how [he looked] and what [he ate]." he felt like he had something to prove to both his father and the world. he threw himself into sports - specifically baseball - and his academics, and he did so well that it forced everyone to shut up about how he was different from them and focus on how he was better than them
^ playing off this: kenji had a bonkers fucking yonkers routine when he was a kid/in highschool. he'd get up hours before school started to practice his swing, go for a ~1hr run, workout, study, etc. He'd go to school, come home, and do it all again. this is exaggerated but my point is that this kid was DETERMINED and had the discipline to see that determination through to the end
didnt have many friends because of all aforementioned things. he had acquaintances, and he was invited to parties and outings and stuff (never went), but he spent most of his free time hanging out with his mom. he never really had a "parents are so embarrassing" phase. he always liked to do anything with his mother: going to the bank, going grocery shopping, watching cheesy telenovelas till ungodly hours in the morning, etc. she was his no.1 supporter, confidant, and best friend
he played for his university's baseball team and got scouted at 19. his mom forced him to finish his bachelor's first so once he graduated with his degree in kinesiology at 21, he was drafted to the dodgers
Kenji & Ami
both of them, up until meeting each other, were totally dedicated to their career (and child) so they had basically 0 time for friends. theyre both borderline losers but theyre juuust good enough at what they do for people to admire them instead of finding them sad and lowkey pathetic
kenji is way more into the idea of being friends than ami is. hes pretty enthusiastic about it; he thinks that they have a kind of rapport, since they share a similar work ethic and are both (unbeknownst to ami) single parents. he calls her to chat abt random things. ami initially isnt superrrr into it; she thinks kenji is kinda lonely and desperate for human connection, & it isnt until her mom points out that she has not spoken to anyone outside of work-related reasons in 10+ years that shes like oh shit, i am also lonely and desperate for human connection. so she grudgingly acquires a friend. theyre both really bad at it
need to clarify that in my mind their dynamic is 95% kenji yapping about work and drama in his personal life (circumventing the 8m baby kaiju hes raising) while ami goes "mhm mhm" and takes notes until kenji notices and is like What are you doing. at which point ami is like...... right . nothing. im listening. and forces herself to put the notepad away. she has a hard time disengaging from the reporter mindset and just hearing something intriguing without turning it into an article. the other 5% are the rare moments where theyre connecting super well - ami's psychoanalyzing the hell out of whatever kenji just said and hes like what are you my therapist. over time she starts opening up to him, too, and eventually theyre comfortable enough to be having philosophical discussions over breakfast just for funsies
before kenji reveals that hes ultraman, ami thinks hes in a gang. he keeps showing up to their lunch "dates" with like bruised eyes and fractured bones and gets all shifty when she tries to ask about what happened. when she eventually confronts him about it, hes so offended that she thinks hed be involved in something like that that he tells her about being ultraman
thats about all i can think of rn, though im sure ill think of more after rotating all the characters in my head for a while. thanks again for stopping in, i appreciate the support :)
#sorry this took so ridiculously long for me to get to#i didnt have too many hcs before i sat down to think about it and i didnt wanna just talk about kenji#honestly. if im being honest. lemme be honest. i find it hard to write for and/or about emi#shes cute asf i loved her in the movie but since she is a literal baby child its difficult for me to get a grasp on her#i can only really think ahead to when she grows up and starts developing a bit more of a personality#anyway. hope this is suffices#ultraman rising#ami wakita#kenji sato#emi sato#mine#asks#anon#trending in japan#entry 2 in the TIJ tag lets goooooooo#just to be clear btw. ami & kenji is a platonic thing to me#not that i hate the idea of them together i just dont feel like they have that sort of chemistry#and anyway (i talked abt this in the notes on TIJ ch.3 but) i lowkey hc kenji as aroace so it doesnt gel w my personal interpretation of hi#but take it as romantic if u want i really dc. theyre silly together in any way
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aaaand BUMBLEBEE 😊 !!!!
#this isnt humanformers it's just my own bumblebee design like hes very much robot still#the face plate just isnt white cus um i do wat i wanbt#LOL#human bee would have afro puffs to resemble his antennas that curl at the tops for the horns too#the lil blue things being his fluff are his door wings!#i want him to be like one of those big fuzzy fat bees where their wings are so tiny how do they even manage 2 fly#well this one does not !#goldbug tho i think should fly bcs starscream parallels and his wings are not stubby and round like bbs here#which he ruthlessly ridicules bb for and flaunts his giant bee wings#anyways bbs servo fluff helps conceal his stingers#if u look closely on the face he has a nose scar and what looks like 3 freckles on each side#but rlly theyre just rips from the nose scar breaking and moving like mini scrapes from ur big car scar#he has an arm btw i just didnt feel like blocking that part of his body where the rest of it would go so i amputated him lol#it's ok i redesigned him off of cane bumblebee so it ok bumblebee it artist interpretation ok#i love his cane tho i need to fraw him with it i just hate fullbody aint nobody got time for that (me only)#(im. lazy )#ANYWAYS yea so. this is my idea of idw bee.. i think he would discover the and bumblebee meme and Not stop saying it. actually#bumblebee got wider and slighter taller but his wings have not ever changed#bumblebee#transformers#tf#if u wanna think of it as humanformers u can but hes an android then and not like a human human so ill tag it#humanformers#tf idw#maccadam#transformers idw
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i know probably nobody gives a shit about it anymore, but i'm high key so fucking glad that Queen showed up in Ch2 perfectly alive, finally putting to rest all those fucking "died in childbirth" headcanons that were rampant back in the Ch1 days to explain where Lancer's mother could've gone if she wasn't present.
somehow that was like the only explanation people seemed to care about, which made absolutely no sense if they were going off of Jevil's "THE QUEEN RETURNS" line.
#haz says a thing#deltarune#deltarune headcanons#deltarune queen#cyber queen#chapter 1 gang where u at#salt in the tags#gone are the AUs where spade king is evil explicitly because his too-good-for-this-sinful-earth wife died having lancer#and i couldn't be happier#even if i am still salty that they were a thing to begin with#it was either that or he was irredeemably evil all along and it makes no sense that his wife would be this paragon of absolute good#i hate that interpretation of him too tbh#you wanna talk ooc shit? spade king and lancer were hit with it the worst#also just to be clear i still don't see queen as lancer's bio-mom#it just doesn't really make sense to me#also bc i made ms lilith and i still don't feel like permanently incinerating her#let me cope her birthday's coming up
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having to continuously explain to friends that we can’t watch an episode of a show together bc i’m not going to be normal about it is so unbelievably cringe but i rlly. cannot handle it
#personal#delete later#i know it sounds quirky rawr xD i can’t watch it i get too excited :3#but it rlly is like. i enjoy it but its not fun for me bc i react v strongly#and am deeply embarrassed abt it#and i Promise u will be annoyed w me while we watch#i Promise i’m not being silly cute uwu like i genuinely#cannot react to this thing normally#and it will be weird and annoying to you#begging u to get that#and then i wanna say it’s an autism thing but then THAT sounds annoying cringe#but it IS but that doesn’t stop it from sounding ridiculous and like i’m playing it up for attention or something#i cannot physically watch or interact with you about this thing because i will be weird about it#and not in a fun way#i will emotionally shut down i will get upset if you interpret it wrong i will scream or laugh or shout at#at inconsequential shit#i will get excited to the point of doing laps around the room and scream laughing and i promise you i know it’s ridiculous and weird#but i physically cannot help it#and i don’t want to annoy or frustrate you#i cannot stress enough#that it’s not something i Like doing
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Milk - In Stars And Time Animatic
My first animatic :D
10/02/2024 - 17/02/2024 (closer to 4 days bc i did stuff mon-fri)
'ISAT' is by the amazing @/insertdisc5! 'Milk' is by Jack Stauber! None of the lyrics or characters belong to me, just the art!
(EDIT: @shelf-cat also made a brilliant Milk animatic for Loop!! for clarification, neither animatic was based off the other, i just want to promote her work bc she offered to for mine as well!)
DO NOT REPOST. And please reblog rather than like, ty! I'd like my work to be seen, and likes do nothing.
TWs (all in art, not irl): brief suicide depictions, self-harm scars, violence, eye injury. Spoilers for ALL of ISAT, including the 2hat ending! Play the game first!
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individual frames underneath cut!
:)
#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#isat loop#you can interpret this as sifloop if u like!! or not :)#i mean it doesn't focus too much on loop AND sif just mainly on loop but i ain't a sifloop hater!!#(as someone who shipped au sanses it would be very hypocritical lol)#dyspraxic artists#traditional art#isat siffrin#artists on tumblr#artsy's animatics#artsy's art#artsy's post#tw: suicide#tw: sh#tw: self-harm#tw: violence#tw: eye injury#art#fanart#pls no criticism i did this for fun and i crumble under the slightest iota of judgement ty :)#(if u have any suggestions on how to make animatics full stop tho pls lmk!!)#i can't draw for crab digitally so i use the old pen/paper combo of the olden days#i've TRIED but stars dyspraxia is like#'oh ho ho u wanna drag to there? you wanna click that? you wanna tap that? SIKE'#and then it's a mess and i've wasted about 7hrs of my day#soooooo yh for the foreseeable future imma stick to trad ways lol
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What If Julius and Subaru both met when Julius was a commoner and Subaru got transported Sooner
fun stuff im sure !! but haah okay given julius was a kid when he was a commoner - yeah theyre both kids here!! not sure how old but definitely somewhere before the age of ten. and i think theyd be up to some shenanigans together im sure!! theyre both very mischevious kids (or from what little we know of little kid julius, given iirc tappei hasnt specified just How Much of a "delinquent" little kid julius is okay. but hes definitely the type to sneak out past curfew or something. stay up late reading too, probably. that sort of thing). and also subarus a kid and no way he ISNT missing home poor guy T^TT getting ripped away from home like that is bad enough at seventeen, getting ripped away from home when you are like. no more than eight or something is Bad. but luckily!! im assuming subaru gets found by the juukuliuses (julius's parents probably?) and thats how julius and subaru form their friendship / long-term yearning for each other (if you so desire that) (okay but no way subaru ISNT gonna form long-term yearning for julius flajsdlf). but yes i think julius and subaru would be silly happy kids together and julius's parents would be like oh no this other kid is so lost where is he from :(( but hes so loved by julius already too... well we got another kid under our roof now.
except. julius's parents die in a flood. so i mean. Hypothetically.... either julisuba survive this one first try or subaru dies for the first time. which. ohh god. oh god. oh g -
#IM. IM JUST GONNA LEAVE ON THAT OMINOUS NOTE#yeah so i think this would turn into childhood friends to Possibly Mutual Pining but actually it might not be mutual if you wanna interpret#reinjuli a certain way. but then but THEN later it can become mutual if u so want#like when u know a person for such a long period of time u change over time. u know?? both you and the relationship u have with this person#has its alterations over time!! thats just how it b but if youre meant to be together youll stick it out <3#julisuba in every universe they befriend each other for good is#Bound to be together for the rest of their lives. To Me. they are soulmates to Me okay their relationship is important#regardless of what form it takes!!! they could grow to think of each other like brothers in an au like this if u so desire too!! which i#think would be really touching <3#yeah so. julisuba childhood friends au. shit goes haywire sometimes. its really awful bc subarus a kid so u can imagine the kind of fucked#stuff hes learning rn hahaha. or you can go the happier route and subaru doesnt learn about rbd until later </3#either way. julisuba real. subarus an eldritch horror. these are both crucial facts for every timeline#i think julius would probs be a bit better having a companion by his side from the very beginning throughout all of this for sure!!#and someone who Gets the jealousy / do i want to be with him or Be him ;-;#i have a fondness for reinjulisuba (THE MESSIEST LOVE TRIANGLE YOUVE EVER SEEN)#and ok if subarus an eldritch horror since childhood then he and reinhard are gonna have Even More in common#hooray for childhood joys and traumas!!!!!#also julisuba visit julius's parents graves :(( leave nice flowers there im sure#subaru-joshua hostility begins also. that sort of thing#rezero#re:zero#ask#natsuki subaru#julius juukulius
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hello as i attempt to become active on tumblr again i will actually be making a vested effort to not rb as much labru bc as much i do enjoy laios and labru, i'm into labru bc of what it means for kabru's character arc primarily and i am lowkey exhausted by how so much kabru art is focused on his ships w white ppl. so unless the labru is v focused on kabru, and not only how he feels abt laios, especially if it is posted by a white person, i'mma try to limit rbs. it is super exhausting to go thru the kabru tags on both twt and tumblr and everything's abt his ships w white ppl. also sucks that the kabrin and toshikabu stuff (his main 2 poc4poc ships) that gets popular is mostly made by white ppl as well, esp kabrin, and therefore often falls flat in their racial dynamics, and also somehow often still has to include a white person anyway. i also want to see more of his dynamics w other characters, and more of his platonic dynamics. so i will be attempting to keep that balance on my blog. i like laios well enough but. i'm a butch of the orient, a colonized and racialized person, dunmeshi in part hooked me with its anticolonial politics and worldbuilding. that's a big part of why i love kabru!
#i'm poc4poc just as much as i'm t4t tbh#when i make exceptions for cis ppl they're not white!#and white ppl project onto kabru in such waaaack ways#part of why i have been procrastinating so much on becoming active again on tumblr tbh#it takes energy and effort and time to curate my experience so that like i can filter out like.#just enough of the inescapable all-encompassing whiteness to feel sane#i make an effort to decenter whtieness in my life. difficult to do w dm fandom unforch but like#my queerness does NOT include whiteness#but also i wanna see more kabru and namari friendship also#i do have like some opinions abt the dwarves' influences but i'm not gonna talk abt that here where white ppl can see#don't want some bitchass angmoh to twist my words#also once i finally get my kabru analysis out of my system i'mma write some for rin too#my mixed coastal southern chinese diaspora girl i love u#^^ is this me projecting. yes. but also not entirely tbh it's also like some of the vibes from the bible and stuff#the way i interpret it#but i am so tempted to b like. ya she's oghe nayu kelate x oghe cino (hainam nang) bc i said so lol. assigned malaysian at kabrumutual#鲤.txt
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what a whiplash going to see my 2016 tumblr dash (as linked in that last post) and getting slapped in the face w full blown ace discourse 😭😭😭
#i was an exclusionist too lmao i was so pissed as if hordes of cishet aces were coming to Invade Our Spaces?????? CRINGE#i still have beef w the split attraction model when non-aspec ppl use it ON BI SUBREDDITS CONSTANTLY TO DISCOURAGE ANY SELF-REFLECTION#like telling newly out bi's their internalized homo/biphobia is just an inborn trait that cant be helped so dont bother looking into it :)#thats more of a personal pet peeve than anything though#honestly the whole discourse was so stupid and the fake stories and moral panic coming from it was ridiculous#u kno whats real and can be trusted? peoples own experiences and interpretations of themselves. and that needs to be respected and accepted#i got so fed up w the dehumanizing and circlejerky nature of the exclusionist side. not to mention the victimhood complexes and the#black and white thinking that were being normalized by the entire discourse. and the essentialist thinking and public shaming#identities are not inherently above examination and there needs to be a balance between inclusion and exclusion in any context#bc both have negative and positive sides when applied to any group or identity. it should be approached w common sense#i wanna veer away from any generalizations and approach things on a case by case basis#but when it comes to someones personal identity and their lived experience. thats none of my business whatsoever#no matter what. basic respect is believing ppl when they say who they are. thats the bare minimum of interpersonal acceptance#fighting against that in order to uphold some us vs them dynamic is straight up awful#if you cant respect someone bc you cant personally understand their experience youre stuck on the wrong thing#you shouldnt need to relate to someone in order to treat them w kindness and empathy#if you need to find someone relatable to accept their validity then youre not genuinely someone accepting of differences
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i always feel so embarrassed and defensive when i see posts like "you ppl only like characters for ships" cus im like Mannnnn i ship things. i guess i have to go die! HELPPP
#me and my taking things way too fucking literally#Like so what if half of my datz analysis is deeply ingrained in my interpretation that hes in love w dhurke...iwhatever man#but i do try to be like. Restrained. i keep it to my own rambles.#i wont come into someone elses house like Yeah and thats why theyre sucking and fucking every night ...#but at the same time i do think there is a LOT of genuine worthwhile analysis u can get from a character thru a shipping lens#And idk where the line is between 'an interesting analysis' and 'youre just a shipper'#im surrounded by ppl who think its annoying and every day im like. ARE YOU MAD AT ME?#OR AM I AN EXEMPTION.#sooo funny i literally was not into shipping before dhurke and datz...#my rp partner and i were like 'yeah no i dont wanna make it romantic' bc neither of us were big on shipping.#And then it became. VERY MUCH SO A ROMANTIC SHIP. Oh well
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I feel like life series fanon jimmy is kind of mischaracterized and there’s an easy way to make sure you’re doing it right: he has a lot of unearned confidence
#the tags is where I’m going to ACTUALLY say stuff LOL!!!#but like I love life series Jimmy mkay. he’s got that curse of dying first and all. which is what I mean by fanon cuz curses aren’t real#but a lot of fans make it like Jimmy accepts the curse? or even acknowledges that it’s real. which bugs me a bit cuz No He Does Not#(side note tho. I’m not mad about it. I know ppl wanna explore the concept of someone cursed to die first and that’s what they’re doing)#but like Jimmy would just be so in denial about it okay. even if you managed to convince him he would be like ‘..BUT SURELY THIS TIME’#and this relates to ranchers too. I love ranchers ok. mostly cuz my sister does tbh LMAOO she loves them. but ranchers fan content isn’t#what I’m looking for cuz it’s so often stuff like.. Jimmy being like ‘I’m sorry I’m cursed’ and Tango being like ‘it’s ok love u anyway’#but it’s really more like ‘CURSED?? NO! WE WILL WIN!’ which I think is MORE fun for the aftermath of their death. meeting in the afterlife.#I NEED to see ranchers content where they keep denying that the curse is real then Jimmy dies and they’re ghosts or whatever and Jimmy’s#like ‘oh no. we didn’t break the curse. tango probably hates me now. he only liked me cuz we thought the curse wasn’t real.’ and tango to be#like upset at first as anyone would be when they die. but then he like notices the way Jimmy is acting and he’s like ‘no.. ranchers 4 life’#???? what am I saying. hire me for writing fanfic I totally know what I’m doing.#anyways what I’m saying is Jimmy is the canary but he’s the canary that’s like ‘SURELY I can sing for the miners the whole way THIS time’#he is NOT the canary who says ‘WELL time to eventually stop singing in this cave’#HOWEVER I do think that although he has loads of unearned confidence and is in a constant state of denial. he does also have that crumble#sometimes. so it’s not totally ooc imo for him to act like that. but it would be rare moments and also mostly post death#ANOTHER SIDE NOTE I WANNA SAY. I HATE the way I’m saying this as if it’s fact. it’s my personal analysis and just because I think it’s right#doesn’t mean I want to present it as undeniable fact. I could be misinterpreting. if you want to interpret life!Jimmy’s character different#then go on ahead. I don’t hate fanon Jimmy I just wish I saw more like how I see him. that is all.#ok I lied I also wanna add that I’m bad at explaining things ESPECIALLY personalities so it’s possible that I didn’t convey what I wanted to#say properly too. sorry. OKAY NOW THAT IS ALL.
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3, 6, 14, 15, and 20
uhhhhh i'll just do these 3 b/c i've been thinking abt them lately
3. have they died before? as it currently stands, spencer's dead dead yeah and not coming back, lucian is also dead (stuck as undead in his main timeline and while he might've suffered a less terrible death in other ones he still is probably dead in those). in aurelio's case they tried to execute him but it didn't work so i don't know if that counts as a death technically? don't know if he's completely immortal either but he survived the execution so that's gotta count for something lmaoo?
6. what's their greatest fear? aurelio's is loneliness and i think lucian's would be death; at the moment i can't think of one for spencer but? i suppose fearing consequences would be very fitting for him.
14&15. are they trans? / are they neurodivergent? up to interpretation.
20. will they recover from their trauma or will it consume them? i actually think, given enough time after the main story events, aurelio might, eventually. but the whole point of spencer & lucian's storylines is that, no they dont lol: i'd say their stories focus on the effects of not allowing yourself to move on from your trauma and fixating on it to the dangerous point of destroying everything around you and yourself (ESPECIALLY in lucian's). there is the small chance that maybe in one alternate timeline lucian does actually somewhat recover in some part, but for his main timeline nah
#ask#my ocs#aurelio#spencer#lucian#lol i wasnt actually expecting to get one of these?? i wouldve done all the main protagonists but we are NOT ready to unpack all that yet#aurelio and lucians fears are kinda funny given how they ended up ahjkskh. and spencer's def would be too given his circumstances#but tbh he's kind of a shit person so like. lol. SORRY HKJSHK he becomes less sympathetic the more i think about his story 😭😭#see for 14&15 i have other ocs where its more explicitly implied/stated but for these guys im hesitant on officially saying anything b/c#like. keep in mind they kill people so 😭. i dont want people to jump to the conclusion that im demonizing trans and/or nd people#i do welcome alternate readings of my stuff and if u wanna make ur own personal hcs but my og intent is never to be demeaning/hateful :(#im always just scared of people taking things the wrong way in my stories oof. theres a lot of complexities/nuance yknow#i do know there's certain details in aurelio & lucian's stories that you could piece together and interpret them as trans possibly?#which wasnt the og intent but they are there so again up to personal interpretation; spencer i feel is most likely cis tho lmfao 😭#funnily enough tho some other charas in his story sorta got their genders transed during development??#again ALL of this though is under major development so a lot of stuff definitely isnt final. lots of story things in my head#i spilled tea all over myself and my computer in the process of answering this 😭😭😭
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Funniest thing ever ever forever is when a popular bully desperately tries to get me to like them but fails miserably
#this one girl was sitting ON my table going like “whyyy dont u like me im just trying to be friends with you”#like ??? take the hint idk mind you im cool w her friends and they just gave me some genuine pity looks#so i just told her that i don't like her really loud and she was like “whyyyy”#and then EYE was like because u bother ppl!!! u bother ppl who clearly do not wanna be bothered#and the look on her face i gen almost feel bad#like is she insecure ???? does she feel weird because im cool with everyone else but her???#which is valid of me btw considering she's kinda mean#but i feel a little bad about it cause she just walked off and said loudly in a pity way to her friends like#“guyssss he doesn't like me even though im just trying to be friends”#because like i know what shes doing because i do it too sometimes#like making everything you say a performance for everyone around you#if you're good at it and you do it effortlessly then its easy but obviously it takes a bit of mental energy#and you keep doing it because it gives you positive validation from other ppl yk#so i empathize with her sort of I mean i feel bad a little bit#whatever maybe i interpreted it wrong and she's just mean. idk lol#ben's conscious stream#ben highschool hours
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