#if this doesn't work out idk if it would be better to go there or back to restaurant job

[akaakeis]

us without me — hinata s.

synopsis :: it's been 4 months since you and shoyo broke up. of course, being the kind person that he is, you ended up still being friends. it just doesn't feel right, having this kind of relationship with him now. his new significant other? that should be you.

wc :: 1.5k

hinata shoyo x gn!reader(?) (2nd person)

cw//notes :: yeah idk if this counts as x reader cause spoiler yall do NOT get together... anyway,, this is my first solid angst fic be kind please and thank u,, angst angst angst,, crying,, occasional cursing,, based off of us without me by grentperez

"hey..." the voice fades out, "... good?" the voice tunes its way in and out of your hearing.

"...hey, you're zoning out, are you okay?"

tears are welled up in your eyes as you snap your head upwards to see two concerned faces looking back at you. shoyo's bright eyes are narrowed as his brows furrow at you. he's worried. the face next to his mirrors his own, looking at you with concern.

"you look out of it. do you wanna use the restroom?" they ask, looking at you tentatively. your eyes drift downwards to their hand, which rests intertwined with shoyo's on the table. right. they're with him now. you offer a hesitant nod, pushing your chair away from the dining table and standing up.

shoyo watches as you and his partner walk off to the restroom. he doesn't know what's going on, and frankly, he's not sure he would fully get it if it was explained to him. in his mind, it had already been 4 months; surely that meant you were completely over him. he doesn't have anything but kindness and platonic love for you— it just wasn't working out, the japan and brazil thing. it was hard to make the time difference work. and the distance.

meanwhile, in the restroom, you start crying. shoyo's partner— hell, you can't even remember their name— panics as you start to cry, frantically trying to comfort you. in frustration, you let out a huff.

"look, i'm fine. you don't need to hang around me and comfort me right now, thanks," you choke out. you gesture to the door of the restroom. maybe you're being mean, but honestly, you can't be bothered to consider that right now. what you would give to be them. for your relationship with shoyo to have never changed. the amount is insurmountable.

they nod slightly, gently patting your shoulder. "sorry, i hope you feel better." with those last words muttered, they exit the restroom, leaving you alone. all the memories have come rushing back to you. 

2 years ago.

"i'm home!" his voice echoes through the apartment. he looks past the entryway, seeing you laying on the couch and watching tv. he kicks off his shoes and joins you on the couch.

1 year ago.

"good morning," he says, his voice still raspy from sleep. his arms find their way around your waist as you stand in front of the stove, making pancakes.

"morning," you reply, smiling at how evident his contentment is in his tone of voice. "you slept late."

he hums. "...yeah, but i'm up now." he laughs softly, lightly squeezing your waist as he hugs you tighter. "let's eat!"

you agree, turning around and handing him a plate of pancakes. "yep, let's go!"

...and then after that,

4 months ago.

"brazil?" you echo him.

he nods excitedly.

"but what about us..?" you ask, looking at him in confusion.

he freezes for a moment, his smile faltering.

"well..." he starts, "i don't know if we would work out if we tried to stay together."

did he really think that your love for him was that shallow? you would go to the ends of the earth for shoyo. you loved him deeply. distance and time zones wouldn't stop you from doing so.

"...you don't even want to try?" your voice breaks, tears welling up in your eyes. "we can make it through this, sho, i know we can," you continue, your voice shaky as you sniffle.

he frowns, taking a step towards you and wiping the tears off of your face with the sleeve of his hoodie. "hey. i just don't want you to feel neglected. we can still be friends... you know i love you, right?"

you pull away from him, quietly nodding. it hurts, knowing that he's doing this because he loves you. what could you even say in response to all of that? you'll always love him, he's your best friend and boyfriend. 

"yeah," you clear your throat, "let's stay friends. when you're in brazil, make sure you call me and tell me what it's like, okay?" you say, forcing a smile onto your face. "i'll help you pack for the flight."

fuck. 

why did you have to remember all of this now? when you're visiting brazil to see shoyo? you're out to dinner with him and his partner— now you remember, their name is eden. even their name is pretty. you can understand why shoyo would like them. they have the aura of the sun— attractive, pretty, kind. what was left to be desired? they looked so good together. they complimented one another perfectly.

was that what you guys looked like?

with a look in the mirror and a quick wiping of your face, you head out of the bathroom. you make your way back to the table, feeling two pairs of eyes on you as you sit back down. you place down a couple bills to pay for your food and then gather your things, getting back up. you put your bag over your shoulder and step to the side of the table.

"sorry, i'm not feeling well. i hope you guys enjoy the rest of dinner. i'm gonna head back to my hotel, if that's okay," you mumble, waving as you walk off to your car.

"wait, wait, are you okay?" shoyo asks, looking at you and frowning.

you smile slightly. "yeah, i'm fine, sho. don't worry. i'm okay."

with that, you leave the restaurant, speeding back to your hotel. the music in your car blares as you whiz past the traffic going in the other direction. you want to go back home, but you're stuck here for two more days.

two more days of this. shit.

you enter the hotel, go up to your floor via the elevator, and go straight to your room. the keycard makes the scanner on your door beep, and the room unlocks. entering the room, you toss your bag onto the small desk by your bed and fall face first onto the mattress. a loud groan can be heard as you lay motionless on top of the comforter. 

the room feels much too quiet without shoyo there. there's no casual chatter of his day, no laughter, no humming. it's dead silent. maybe you made the wrong decision, going back to the hotel to be alone.

the silence is broken by the buzz of your phone: a message from shoyo. it reads hey, are you feeling better now? you left so suddenly :( eden and i are worried about you

you don't bother opening the message, tossing your phone across the room and burying your face back into the bed. oh, to be eden. 

shoyo fell hard and fast for them. you would know, since you were the first person he told. their aura was captivating. they were sweet to everyone they met. and they were so, so pretty. it felt unfair, having to see them and shoyo be so happy together while you were still stuck in the past.

you didn't get it. why would he say you could still be friends? he didn't need you, and this is only keeping you from moving on. you love him, but god was this hard.

as you spiral into these thoughts, tears flow. why did you go to brazil? 

even though you wanted to be in eden's position, it was next to impossible to imagine it. they looked so good with him.

your phone, laying on the other side of the hotel room, rings. sliding off the bed and grabbing it, you lay on the floor and answer the phone, only to hear shoyo's voice come over the line.

"hey, you weren't replying to my messages. i just wanted to make sure you're okay. are you sick?" he asks quickly, his voice laced with concern for you.

you probably should've checked who was calling before picking up, damn it. you let out a soft sigh and reply, "yeah, sorry, sho. i'm fine, thanks for checking on me. i think i may fly home early, though."

"wait what? why?" you can practically feel him frowning through the phone.

"cause... i don't know. i'm feeling homesick," you lie.

"oh," he remarks, his tone sad, "well i hope you have a safe trip back then." he follows this sentence with an old nickname he had for you, making you pause. the memories rush back again, making your eyes brim with tears.

"...thanks, sho. i'll see you some other time."

with that, you end the phone call and buy tickets back home. within 30 minutes, you're all packed and ready to leave for the airport. you drive yourself there, letting the music blast through your car on the way. 

getting through security is shockingly quick, and none of your bags get flagged for inspection. your gate was an easy walk, the terminal being right next to security. you were of the first group to get called onto the plane, too. this was a nice change of pace.

as you sit on the plane, you look out the window at the ground below. you haven't taken off yet. coming to brazil definitely wasn't a good idea, but it was an experience for you... which is good, you guess. maybe one day, you'll be content with only having a friendship with shoyo. for now, though, you needed distance to get over your feelings for him. at least the romantic ones, anyway.

notes ::

⟡ if you're reading this, you are so gorgeous!! don't compare yourself to other people like i wrote for the purpose of this work

⟡ i actually enjoyed writing this it was pretty relaxing for me :)

⟡ tried my best but idk if im the best at writing angst...

⟡ if you wanna read more of my work, check out my masterlist <3

🏷️ :: @chososcamgirl ,, @anqelfries ,, @cheriisae ,, @bakery-anon + @bokukos <3

© akaakeis 2024 all rights reserved. please do not repost, edit, or translate my works on any platform.

[thevalkyriesshadow]

People saying SJM will write Elucien because she's not going to make poor baby Lulu (PBL) suffer again because he's one of her favorites ....

My brother in Christ.

They're ALL her favorites. It's her fucking book. They're her fucking characters.

Now if we were going to RANK her favorite characters, I still don't even think Lucien would make top 5. He's not a part of the IC for a reason - and considering that SJM has chosen to write about them over him - tells us enough about the ranking of her faves. It's always going to be:

1. Rhys / Feyre

2. Nesta

3. Azriel

4. Cassian

5. Elain

6. Amren

7. Mor

8. Lucien

And honestly placing Lucien at 8 is still debatable. His storyline has been reduced more and more with every single book. I'd say he was definitely up there with Feyre in Book 1 - but since ACOMAF his character quality and page persona has declined steadily. Significantly.

Idk if y'all have ever read a book or written anything - but typically a writer who likes a certain character ... writes about that character. A lot more than she writes about her other characters. That character might've started as a minor one or even background character - but the writer likes them so much they find a way to put them in the page more, finds a way to work them into the story. See what SJM did with Ithan Holstrom in CC. With Fenrys. They were introduced as minor characters and then became a big part of the story.

The exact OPPOSITE is happening with Lucien. It's not a slow burn - it is erasure.

If he is such a favorite - where is he?

Also what makes you think SJM isn't going to make her favorites suffer? Y'all saw what Aelin went through. Saw what Rhys went through. I don't like to compare traumas - but Lucien's trauma pales in comparison to some of the other harrowing backstories we've seen in ACOTAR itself. Genuinely I think whatever Rhys, Elain, Nesta, Azriel, Emerie, Gwyn went through is far worse than what Lucien went through. Not saying he didn't suffer - but the argument that SJM wouldn't have him lose his mate because she likes him is so ridiculous.

Let's stick to the books. And I mean the actual text in the books - not farfetched headcanons and fanfics and theories and claims of extrapolation "foreshadowing".

SJM can change her mind and her opinions and her interviews and her Pinterest boards. What she can't change is the story she's laid out for 4 books now. What she can't change is the direction her characters are taking her in and the words she's already written.

Hi anon

I hope you feel better after getting that off your chest... sometimes you just gotta rant

BUT

I would like to make a few points

1. I do write stories (beyond fanfics) and yes I have favorite characters I write but if I spent as much time writing about a character as SJM did with Lucien, that character has a story to be told. He's connected to many characters in the story and is mated to one of the Archeron sisters (who the stories being told in ACOTAR are ultimately about). To say he is being written off the page just because he wasn't as prevalent in ACOSF for example is a bold statement (he really had no ties to Nesta's storyline so it makes sense he wasn't in it as much) but a storyline he is connected to? Elain's - whose book we will inevitably get.

2. I don't like how you say his trauma is not as bad as the others. It's not okay to compare people's traumas. What might not seem like an emotional/psychological/physical traumatic event to one person doesn't mean it's not devastating to another.

3. SJM can absolutely change what she's already written... She is the god of ACOTAR afterall. She can do as she pleases. A perfect example of this is when she retconned that Azriel was present in Sangravah when it was attacked. Making him the first one there, the one to slaughter all the soldiers in one room, and save Gwyn from further harm. Previously, we were to believe he was just informed, but SJM changed that with what she wrote in ACOSF.

Hope you have a wonderful day anon!

[ekat-fandom-blog]

Dr Wayne AU

Idea from this post.

Bruce graduated from medical school. He went out and trained to become a vigilante. He came back and things mostly turned out like the original universe does. Until Dick. The stress was getting to him. Gnawing away at his morals and last shred of patients. Mysteriously, the building Tony Zuko was in blew up and Batman wasn't seen again.

Years go by, and more mysterious explosions kill more mob bosses and super villains. No one connects Bruce to the explosions except for a malnourished street kid who caught him in the act. Smart little street rat that is Jason Todd uses this knowledge to get some food. Bruce quickly takes a liking to him and brings him home. Jason starts helping Bruce rig these explosions after a while. While setting up a bomb meant for their slipperiest evil doer, Joker, it goes off while Jason's in the building. Bruce goes a little crazy (or maybe crazier. who's to say) after Jason's death.

He meets Tim Drake at a function being held by Mr and Mrs Drake and notices some things. The first thing he notices is how similar Tim looks to Jason when they met in that dark alley. The second thing he notices is that the Drakes are almost always out of Gotham. The third thing he notices is that Tim seems to light up when Bruce mentions Dick. He'd love to just snatch the kid up and bring him home, but he couldn't. Not without a reason to keep the kid. It was just luck that one of the many villains still populating Gotham decided to target the plane the Drakes were on a week later. In his gratitude for the opportunity to take in the sweet child he'd found, he made sure the explosion he set for them would only maim them instead of kill them.

Getting Jason was amazing and horrible. The sweet precious boy nearly killed Bruce and Tim with the minor explosive he'd put in Bruce's favorite car. But that didn't matter all that much. By the end of the entire debacle, no one was hurt and they'd even managed to clear up some misunderstandings. Bruce had all of his children under one roof again.

He thought he had all of his children under one roof until he learned about Damian. There weren't any words he could use to describe how upset it made him to learn that another of his children were being kept from him. He did have to thank Talia, however. Without Talia slipping up to Jason about Damian's existence he wouldn't have known until one of the Al Ghul's revealed it to him. Tim overheard Jason and Bruce planning to retrieve Damian and revealed that he'd known since he came to the manor what Jason and Bruce did. Told the two that he knew how to help gather intel on the League long term as long as they could slip a microchip into one of the League's mainframe computers. The Plan went well, all things considered. Jason and Bruce came out of it with a few scars and a broken rib, which was less damage than expected. They sadly weren't able to catch many of the assassins in any of their micro explosions, but they overall won the battle.

After everything was said and done, Damian fit in well with their chaotically violent family. Even if he did prefer swords to explosives. It was much less strange than Dick's proclivities to only do harm when he felt it was strictly necessary. He gets it from Alfred, Bruce supposed.

[stevethehairington]

i am once again thinking of a good omens wicked au, but this time instead of the obvious crowley as elphaba and aziraphale and glinda, im thinking of the OPPOSITE.

im thinking of how AZIRAPHALE fits elphaba's character in that he is an outsider amongst his peers and he's a little bit awkward and he's got so much faith in the almighty/the wizard. he's got "parents" (read: god) who expect so much from him and siblings who are ashamed of him. and he's got dreams! he wants to do big things! he wants to work hand in hand with and make the almighty/the wizard proud!

and im thinking about how CROWLEY fits glindas character in the sense that he's suave and charming and people are drawn to him. he knows how to talk to them and how to get them to do what he wants, and he's the one that teaches aziraphale things about the world (a la popular, like tempting aziraphale into eating meat and drinking wine and all these very human things he never would have thought to do without crowleys influence).

im thinking of how the two of them start out absolutely loathing each other, as mortal enemies, one could say... but how over time and as they bond more and more, as they see different sides of one another, that loathing turns into something else. something just as strong, just as passionate, but softer. gentler. sweeter. it turns into love.

and of course everything gets shattered when upon meeting his idol, aziraphale learns that god isn't what he thought she was. it turns out god is just a pipe dream. all there is is a floating head, the metatron, posing as god. and not at all the great and powerful entity aziraphale believed. and the metatron CANT help aziraphale, can't fix him. and thus the downfall of aziraphale begins.

[lorephobic]

idk how to even like. put this pain into words and i would normally vent about this shit on twitter, but the person its about follows me on there so like. anybody have skills for coping with the crushing realization that the person u love most in this world and have built ur life around sees ur current situation together as a temporary hurdle that's preventing them from their truest and happiest self which. is separate from u entirely? anyone know how to deal with this?

[dutybcrne]

Kaeya is definitely the sort of parent who prefers to sleep in the same bed as his baby.

[angeltism]

"spar.kle is fictional who cares" I have seen people praising her for her racist anti-romani comments what the fuck kind of world do you live in

[t-u-i-t-c]

the more i think about it the more i actually like daichi

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[wolpatinga]

[polkadotpatterson]

okeydoke as I have not had much energy for working on stuff lately (but lots of motivation) I'm not gonna do proper NaNo with a wordcount or anything, BUT I am gonna make it a goal to get some amount of work done on a writing project every day (at least until I go away on the 24th). Main priority blaseball projects are, in no particular order:

Fic about the ending

Abner fic

Simon's Quest

secret fic(s) :)

get the Talkers exchange set up

Aside from that, I've been poking at more non-blaseball stuff, which is a good excuse for me to plug my writing blog @cyndakip! All my fics get posted there, so if you're interested in my writing beyond just blaseball (especially if you like pokemon), I recommend following me there, since I don't post non-blaseball fics here.

[ardate]

Things are just so bleak man.

[ame-to-ame]

there are things that you don't do for a year or more and pick up just right where you left off and these days i fear loving you might be one of them

[guinevereslancelot]

i'm so bummed i accidentally turned town a job interview for a job where I could have worked with a good friend and mentor 😔

[worstloki]

Don’t you hate when people call mcu Loki “Liesmith” when he hardly ever lies?

hate is a very strong word. i do think he deserves fancy titles but giving him one that he doesn't have in canon and using it like it's true would be a bit strange

[winxys]

i rlly hope ooo abandon this sound after this cb like i'm sorry but this is not working for me