#if they were to meet again though - Jean would probably spend the entire time weeping apology after apology

[cry-ptidd]

I got a currently unrelated but important and angst af question(s?);

I know you said that Jean didn’t know that the beast of gevaudan was his daughter Laura, but imagine if he did, before or after he ‘killed’ the beast. Can you imagine the raw heart ache and grief finding how that his baby girl was turned into a monster and (had to) killed her?

Also, if Jean and Laura somehow met in modern Hellsing, even for five minutes, what would be said between father and daughter?

Enjoy the pain ☺️

I'll add onto that, anon, and share some historical facts with you that make this situation even more painful!

According to sources (article in French citing Guy Crouzet), Chastel's signature doesn't appear on the Marin report written the morrow after the beast's death, the 20th of June 1767. In the article, they speculate as to why, considering it was very clear according to eye witnesses and the lord of Apcher. According to Crouzet, the hypothesis could be that he either wasn't invited to sign it or that he was, but refused to attend.

If we want to take this into Laura's story and canon, then the idea that Jean who is hailed as the hero of Gévaudan for killing the beast and whose signature on that report would've "hailed and justified his glory and exploit for centuries to come", refused to attend it. He knew how to write and read, everyone knew he was the one that fired the shot. Why wouldn't he come?

Of course, why wouldn't he come. He will be given money and his name will be remembered as the hero who slew the beast and ended its reign of terror. Except the beast had his daughter's eyes, the eldest daughter he hadn't seen in 9 years because of a single day where she went to herd cows in a clearing, when whatever the hell started to happen to her. He hadn't heard from her since, he didn't know what she became, if her affliction was cured, if she was taken care of. The daughter he knew as kind and obedient and devout and the sweetest and a bit naive child he proudly loved, then the worst thing happens to her and years later something similar to what she's seen, a "wolf-like creature" terrorizing the locals, starts to happen again.

And two years after the beast's continuous rampages, he finally meets it face to face, and it's unnervingly familiar.

He would barely have the time to even process what happened before it's torn up, and he'd recognize the awful monster he just shot was his daughter that he left in the care of holy men to cure her and she was supposed to be better so what the hell was that thing he just shot? Is that supposed to be what happened to his child? This creature, so hateful and plain ungodly, is what his little girl grew into?

And now he's invited to sign the Marin report to confirm that indeed he did shoot the beast. It's what he will be remembered for, for killing the monster that no one knows is his eldest daughter that "succumbed to an illness" nine years ago and he's later offered just 72 pounds for the life of his daughter. That's what she was worth, apparently.

It was also noted that the beast's body was very poorly embalmed after its recovery. I imagine that whatever they found - or whatever the dogs had torn up in Laura's stead - had a rough time. I think that if Chastel saw it here, he would've been thankful for everything to not recognize the dead eyes staring up at him.

[razorblade180]

Twin Snowflakes pt21:Ice Breaker?

[Part 20 here! <-]

Snow, as far as the eye can see. Summer has had enough of snow. A terrible thing considering her move sets and living situation. The frozen rain gently fell down into a meadow of pure white, blanketing any beautiful flowers that could be right below the surface. Her body fell flat, landing stomach down. Cold, but not too cold; the usual case for her mind every time she ended up here. Why was she here? Her heater was definitely on before she laid down. Wool socks kept her toes nice and toasty, and windows were shut tight. She had triple checked. Perhaps this was an actual dream this time instead of an unpleasant visit from the worst guest ever. Summer didn’t want to deal with Shiva. She didn’t want to do anything really. Her body felt...tired. Eyelids were heavy and energy was spent. What was this?

The crunch of snow being crushed broke the silence of the meadow and obstructed Summer’s already limited view. Her head lifted up to see the last person she wanted to. Now she really hoped this wasn’t a dream. It would be dreadful for Shiva to take those away from her too.

The problematic entity laid down on her side. Her hand reached out to brush away a few strands of Summer’s hair to get a better look. “Tired?” Shiva asked, rubbing the girl’s cheek. “I’d be too, faking joy in my life. How long do you think you’ll last? You feel it right, time slipping past you? Days, hours, minutes, seconds; how much more time can you spend failing at everything? Aren’t you tired of it all?”

Summer didn’t respond. Summer couldn’t respond. All she could do was stare into Shiva’s alluring gaze and weep, motionless.

“Awww poor thing.” Shiva rolled Summer over on her back, then straddled her. Her left hand kept rubbing Summer’s pale cheek. Shiva looked down at the girl with a smile that while small, was still oozing with a smug attitude despite her calm voice. “Just close your eyes and surrender to me. What else can you do? You can’t beat me, out think me, or do anything that matters when it counts the most. Do you enjoy it, burdening everyone? How much longer will you hold Nick back?”

Summer’s lip began to quiver. The warmth of her tears was the only source of heat filling her. They began to run faster and faster down the side of her face, only to meet Shiva’s gentle hands rubbing them away. Those same hands drifted lower down and stopped on Summer’s eck. Shiva never squeezed or even entertained. Her demeanor felt almost infant like, the way she tilted her head as she examined everything Summer did. Or...what she didn’t do.

Above, the ice ceiling began melting away again, the meadow fading into dust along the way. Shiva was the last thing Summer saw before everything became an empty space of black. Then, she woke. Dried tear marks were strong on her face and something pinned her right hand from trying to rub them off. Summer looked at her bedside and was taken back by the sight of her brother sleeping with his head laying on the mattress and hand holding her own. “Nick?” Summer said softly, pulling her hand free gently. Nick had always been a light sleeper. Summer had barely done anything and yet Nick woke up.

The boy rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. “Hey sis. Did you sleep okay? You kept crying and trembling.”

“I was?” Summer rubbed her neck and rubbed her tear tracks away. “Sorry. I...guess I had a nightmare.” The sun barely hit her curtains so it must still be pretty early. “Were you here all night? Nick, you’re sick.”

“It’s not like you can catch a cold, miss immunity.”

Summer pouted. “That’s not what I meant and you know it. You’re not gonna get better sleeping on the ground. Worry about yourself first for once?” She said, dry and tired. Summer laid back down and faced away from her brother. She heard him stand up but didn’t hear him walk away. Her mattress sank down seconds later and his hand took hers again.

“Are you...mad at me? You were pretty upset a couple days ago about the Paladin match, and Valerie sure had some choice things to say to me. I know I can be…overbearing at times. I get that you probably want space, but can you at least tell me if there’s anything I did specifically.”

His voice sounded hurt and tired as well. Summer didn’t know Valerie and Nick were on shaking ground. Is that why Nick didn’t tell her he was sick? Summer turned around. “I’m not mad at you. Things have been really low lately is all. I’m sorry if it felt like I’ve directed any of it at you. Things should get better after the tournament. Veronica will probably leave, I’ll have nothing but school lined up, and Oscar will hopefully be back by then. Not the biggest fan of virtual sessions.”

“Yeah, I can see that. Listen if you want more free time then I won’t make you-”

“Performing at the tournament is just fine.” Summer smiled. “Like I would miss a chance to stun a crowd, all of Remnant in fact. Besides, I made an Acr promise to an orphan, remember? I couldn’t back out if I wanted to.”

“Yeah...that would be pretty bad:” Nick cringed at the thought of an entire orphanage being sad and lied to. That’s guilt that would follow someone forever. “Got any plans today? It might do us some good to practice at least once together before the tournament. Not that we really need it.”

“Please, if it isn’t our dual summoning then we’re set. We can’t do that today though. Veronica and I are...umm…” Summer wanted to tell Nick about their argument yesterday which led to Veronica all but forcing her to agree to a fight today and the use of stolen diamond dust, but it wouldn’t make much sense to. Endangering him with her risks was the main reason things escalated. “We’re...going around town and the woods to get things for my outfit.”

“The woods?”

“Yeah she wants to see me fight grimm and we’re gonna look for pure dust and stuff. So don’t worry if you get one of your little twin chills or whatever you call it.”

“I don’t call it anything. Twin chill is nice though. Well be careful. Expect a call if I feel it. Better safe than sorry. It would suck for me to be grabbing school papers while Shiva is rampaging through the woods.” Nick was getting a little stressed thinking about it. One minute he’s stapling papers then sees a massive glacier outside the school window. Not to discredit his sister, but that’s the kind of luck Nick typically had. Things go fine, and then they don’t.

“School papers?” Summer questioned. “Nick it’s not a school day.

“I know. I’m gonna stop by there this afternoon and get the work I missed.” A look of disbelief and judgement shot him right in his heart from Summer. “What!? Just because I’m sick doesn’t mean the homework disappeared. I’m simply going to get it and come back home to rest. Summer’s look did not waver. Nick turned a little red for the nonverbal call out. He stood up. “Leave me alone! I’m going back to bed and then I will do exactly as I said I would do.”

“You’re full of shit…” Summer said while doing a fake cough.

“Night, you little diva.” Nick walked out her room and grabbed the door to shut it.

Summer reached out for a second. “Wait a second.” She said, her voice more reserved. “Nick, y...you love me right? Like, spending time with me?”

Nicholas looked at his sister with a raised brow. “Of course I love you. You’re my baby sister. Not that you being that means I have to hang around you or anything. Why, someone dumb tell you otherwise?”

Summer couldn’t help but smile. “No, hearing you actually say it is just nice. Rest well.” Nick smiled back then closed the door. The smile Summer wore tried its best to stay, but left as quick as it came. Her swarming thoughts made her head feel heavy and cluttered until Summer found herself resting it in her hands as she attempted to rest a little more. Sleep never came back for her unfortunately, no matter how many minutes passed her by.

It felt like no time at all before Summer was out of her bed and getting dressed for the day. She decided to keep her hair down for now and was more concerned about if she was gonna be warm enough. Her standard black thermal leggings and old white over coat should do the trick, but Summer felt compelled to put her ear muffs around her neck and wear warmer socks with her already poofy white winter boots. Snow gloves were put in her coat for safe keeping. Testing diamond dust without Nick was more stressful than she thought it would be. At least the layers of close gave her a good excuse whenever she’d start sweating.

The fated knock on the door finally came and took ten years off of Summer’s life. “Y-Yes?” The door creaked open before being fully swung open with Veronica on the other side. An exceptionally beautiful soft brushed purple winter coat that had a belt around the waist and big black buttons to bundle the whole thing up. Her color of choice was complemented with grayish-white jeans that looked roomie; a weird choice for the girl. Then there were her gym shoes school? Her entire bottom half was casual in contrast from the coat.

Summer got a bit worried. Veronica dresses herself with purpose. Her wardrobe doesn’t sacrifice functionality for flare, yet is stylish nonetheless. This one felt disjointed however. “Ummm what’s with the shoes and jeans? I would’ve thought you’d look a little more...stunning?” Said Summer, choosing her words carefully. She must’ve succeeded because Veronica gave a rude look and nothing else. It was easy to tell that she was still tired from the way she rubbed her eyes. “Didn’t sleep well either?”

“I’m sore and the time difference hasn’t gone away yet. As for my clothes, why would I wear my good clothes when I’m going to the woods and things can get physical? I’d wear a different coat if I had one.” Veronica pulled out a scrunchy and put her lion’s mane of a hair into a ponytail tail.

The sleeves of the coat fell down and Summer became a little more anxious to see Ember Cilca on Veronica’s wrists.“ Oh right, of course she’ll dress comfy in a fight. And use a strong weapon. Why not use her own? Is punching me that exciting?” Her eyes looked down and noticed a small duffel bag outside the door. “What is she gonna do to me!?” Summer ‘casually’ walked over to her sword and put it on her hip. It made her feel a little safer. Then she grabbed a hidden vial of diamond dust. Safety was right back out the window.

“You’re only bringing the one?”

“If this goes terribly then I don’t need Shiva getting a double dose. One is more than enough.” Summer held it out. “Here. It’s probably better you have it for now.”

“On that, we can agree on.” Veronica took the vial and grabbed and used her tail to grab her bag. “Let’s get this over with already…” she stormed off immediately.

Summer thought it best to follow Veronica’s lead. The girl was clearly in a bad mood. “Dying in the woods by a girl crushing on my brother. Yeah, that’s on par with the rest of my life.”

xxxx

With two of noisiest people out of the house, it was pretty easy to tell something was amiss for Weiss. It’s almost eight in the morning and the sound of guitar or vocals hadn’t rattled her morning coffee. Yeah they had a sound room, but that never stopped Summer from playing a rift on the way to it. “It’s quiet, too quiet.” She took a sip from her mug then went to the garden. “Maybe Summer is training? Veronica could probably hear through the sound room.”

The closer Weiss got to the garden, the easier it was to hear that someone actually was there. Yang. She was upside doing push-ups in just a tank top and yellow pajama pants.

“Forty five...forty six...forty seven…forty- oh hey Weiss.”

“Hehehe, how are you not freezing? It’s barely warmed up yet.”

“Since when have I ever been bothered by a little cold air?” Yang let her balance slip to land right side up. “I’m hot every day all day.” She flipped her hair for dramatic effect.”

“Well Mrs. Hot stuff, have you seen Summer? Despite her reluctance to go to school, the girl is an early riser. Especially on the weekends. Is- hey, you got a little…” Weiss pointed on a few bruises on Yang’s right shoulder.

“Oh this? Veronica wanted to spar yesterday. Her mood wasn’t exactly friendly.” Yang sighed. Her body flopped on the soft grass near the tear area. “That girl, it feels like all we do these days is spar rather than trying to talk.”

“Gee, I wonder where she gets that from.” Weiss said with the most sarcastic tone in the world. “I guess I’m in no position to make fun. Summer is hard to communicate with too. Teenagers man.”

“Tell me about it! Were we this bad?”

“Yeah.” Weiss nodded, remembering everything and cringing. “Yeah… gods, we were a lot to deal with.”

“You maybe. I was pretty-”

“Hard headed and passionate? Uncompromising on everything? Loud as hell?”

Yang sat up. “Okay already! Point taken hehe. Oh if you’re looking for Summer, she’s out in town with Veronica.”

That wasn’t an answer Weiss thought she’d hear. “For what? Those two can’t breathe in front of each other without wanting to fight.”

“Well they don’t have a choice if Veronica wants to make a perfect outfit for her. Walking, running, sitting, posture, Veronica likes seeing all of that in order to make a quality design. Kid has a real gift.” Yang crossed her arms. “Too bad people don’t give her the time of day.”

“Oh. So the situation hasn’t gotten any better for her?” Weiss asked.

Yang shrugged. She began pacing around in circles. “Besides what happened here, there hasn’t been a school fight in a while or calls home. Grades are average but that’s to be expected. No drugs either, thankfully. Pretty sure that was a one off thing. Still, Veronica is clearly unhappy and not even Blake gets much out of here these days. We’d take her therapy but she’ll run off or flat out won’t go.” Yang let out another huge sigh, slouching over. “I’m worried. I just want her talking to somebody that will listen and care.

Weiss could relate to that. “Well, at least Nick chips away at that armor of hers.”

“True. That boy is magic. I don’t wanna have him doing it all by himself though. I’m positive he has his fair share of problems too. How is he?”

“All work and no play recently. You saw how sick he was yesterday right? If I could just take a little bit of his drive and replace it with Summer’s reasoning….”

“Ruuuuude! I’m reasonable!” Shouted the boy from the balcony. “Some would say I’m actually quite flexible.

Weiss scoffed, rolling her eyes playfully. “Those people don’t live with you! How are you feeling? Still have a fever?”

“A little one, but I think I’m alright. Well enough to go get my assignments from school? Please?” He said, giving puppy eyes that made Yang laugh and Weiss facepalm.

“Hahaha. Nick, I wish my horses worked half as hard as you do, but I think you might be giving your mother gray hair.”

“Oh he knows! I tell him all the time that one day he’ll notice my hair is gonna go from white, to silver over night because of him and his sister.”

He smiled. “And you’ll look just as beautiful.”

“Nice try, Jaune jr. Fine, you can get your work. However, you’re not walking. I’ll drive you there later and just like with training I’m gonna time you. I swear I don’t know where you get this drive from. Even I know when to take a break.”

“Not at his age.” Yang shot back. “Jaune and Ruby mellowed you out. Nick, your mother didn’t know what to do with herself sometimes. Especially when nobody was around. I’ve walked in on her reading a cookbook, in Menageran! I live there now and I barely know one dialect!”

“Blake didn’t teach them all?

“No point. There’s tons of different languages. Just ask Veronica. She knows two fluently and will gladly show it off. Did you by any chance hear the part of the conversation where your mother and I talked about her? If so, can you not mention it?”

“No worries, didn’t hear anything besides you wanting her to open up more. I don’t think you gotta worry about that too much.” Nick spoke with confidence, hitting his chest. “Veronica might not know it yet but I’m positive Eliza enjoys her company; and I’m trying my best to get Veronica to talk to Summer semi-friendly.”

Weiss was skeptical. “You’ve tried that before. Got a master plan you haven’t shared?”

He shook his head proudly. “Not at all! Hahaha!” Nick looked to the sky. Gentle snowflake flowed through a slow air current like a frozen river. “All I have is hope.”

xxxx

“This is utterly hopeless.” Was the only thing Veronica can say in despair as dozens of people stood in multiple lines to board airships. “Why is everyone up so early!? It’s been half an hour and we haven’t budged. The week day isn’t like this.”

“Of course it isn’t. People work.” Summer looked around to see familiar citizens going on and off ships with luggage; as well as complete strangers who haven’t adjusted to the cold of Atlas. “Many important people have already started showing up in advance for the tournament. They may not help like you will but coming so soon is a great excuse to explore the kingdom and gain influence. They might even drop by the schools and try recruiting if they can get away with it. Almanac is a place where-”

“I know, I know. It’s where society collides. It’s built down on Mantle as a way to expose youths like yourself to how the less fortunate live and inspire you to make the city better. Conversely, all the trips and equipment allows the kids in Mantle to have quality equipment and see Atlas up close; giving them a goal to work towards.”

“It also exposes the older people here to the citizens of Mantle. Creating situations where interactions between the two isn’t rare changes some people’s perspective, or at least makes them think twice about deciding on some affirmative action that hurts the people below. It’s a little harder to disregard the common man whenever their kids are friends with them and you know some.”

“Not really. They think twice because it isn’t smart to angry people who can get to your front door with ease.”

Summer felt her entire vibe get a little bleeker. “Way to make it pessimistic.”

“Hard not to be with a line like this!” Veronica shouted too loudly, drawing a few eyes their way. Not that she cared. “Ugh, isn’t there another means of getting down? Can’t you flex your last name and skip?”

“Weren’t you listening? A lot of high profile people are here. If I throw titles around then so will they. Then you have a bunch of rich people being snobby and being put into a bad light. That includes your family.” Summer witnessed Veronica’s agitated state get a little more restless. It was very strange. This wasn’t the “people agitate me” kind of mood Veronica showed off. No, she seemed torn up. Against her better judgment, Summer took the girl's hand in concern. “Hey are okay? You’re acting weird.”

Veronica looked at the girl's big blue eyes. It was scary how pretty those eyes were. Arc blue had its own appeal that was different then Nick’s chilling Schnee eyes. Veronica looked at her hand and pulled it away. “I’m just a little hungry and you know, lady stuff.” She lied about the second part. “Also don’t touch me without asking. You know I don’t let anybody touch me without asking.”

“Yeah between that and your semblance I can’t imagine you being much of a hugger.” Summer laughed nervously, wondering why she said that of all things. This line has single handedly forced the longest interactions they’ve had without a fight in an extremely long time. Summer was waiting for Veronica to decide on fighting here instead. They were running out of banter! “So umm...wanna eat and pray the line gets shorter when we get back?”

“Will it?” Veronica deadpanned. The lack of eye contact told her all she needed to know. This line was only gonna get worse. “Ugh. Fuck it, new plan. I’m not waiting any longer to get a ride.”

“I told you, using your title is a bad idea.”

“I’m not going to, genius. Follow me.” Veronica ditched the line and started heading back more towards the outer rim of Atlas, right where buildings and watch posts were stationed. “Let’s play a game.”

“That’s never a good sentence.” Summer instinctively moved a little slower. She was not about to get sucker punched. “What kind of game?” She was already regretting asking. It was gonna be crazy.

Veronica finally stopped moving and turned around. “A race to Mantle. The fun way.” She pointed to the edge.

Summer looked out and saw the chains extend down. One of them had a good enough angle to point them in the direction where the woods are. Right at the edge of the old slums in fact. “You’re nuts…”

“Don’t play that card!” Veronica pointed at her. “I know all about you snowboarding on these things!”

Boom! Caught red handed. No way Summer could deny that. “I promised Winter I wouldn’t needlessly endanger myself.” That was a solid excuse.

“Aren’t we literally going to the woods to mess with dangerous dust you stole?” And that was a solid answer. “You’re not gonna talk me out of this. I debate and public speak on national levels. You have a school club.”

“I’m not even in the debate club.”

“Exactly. Now stop arguing. We’re wasting time.”

As usual, Summer could only fall into whatever crazy thing would happen next. But she wasn’t giving up that easily. Veronica wouldn’t dare be too rude in public. “What’s stopping me from walking away right now? I could get on an airship and make it to the forest before you get down the chains.”

An amused chuckle came from Veronica. “Hehehe, it’s funny how wrong you are sometimes. I said race to Mantle, and I never said I was gonna use the chains.” Before Summer had a chance to even think about what she just said, Veronica fell through the ground.

It was so sudden that Summer was thankful she didn’t blink. “Veronica!?” She gasped. Now there wasn't a choice at all! “That’s so...I can’t believe..aaah! Why is she like this!?” Summer shouted to nobody. Her feet raced to the edge, then jumped. The rush of cold early morning air was more than enough for her to create a snowboard of ice that planted her right on the chains. “Can’t things be normal for once?” A path of glyphs shot down the chain. The use of her semblance with the little control over diamond dust she had made for a potent combination. Summer was blazing down the chain! The links between each one were terrifying though. A late hop could shatter the board and send her flying. “Don’t fuck up don’t fuck up don’t fuck up don’t fuck up, and juuuump!” Little hops was all it took for her to soar down wards for seconds before landing. “Doing a trick or two would be pretty amazing if this wasn’t so dangerous and a race.” Summer looked around the air. “Where is she anyways?” Her gaze finally spotted the girl. Veronica was actually beneath her. The girl’s back faced the ground while her hands rested in her pockets, eyes closed blissfully. “Veronica?” Summer said. She got noanswer. Veronica continued to fall effortlessly. As if she was unconscious. Summer shouted again. “Veronica! You alright over there?” Still no answer. Now Summer was worried. “HEY!? VEE VEE!”

Not even her despised nickname gave Veronica a reaction. Summer could feel her heart start to race. “She can’t actually be unconscious right!?” Reasoning with herself wasn’t working. If by some chance Veronica was knocked out...Summer didn’t want to think about it. There was no time to think. Without another second to waste, Summer jumped off the chain and began falling towards her long term acquaintance. She brandished Myrtenaster and angled three glyphs to bounce off of to reach Veronica. Summer extended her hand in fear of the girl’s safety. “Veronica!!!!”

“Huh?” Veronica opened her eyes to see a blur of white and blue hurling towards her. “What in the-” She wasn’t the only one surprised. Summer’s eyes bugged out. The girl was completely caught off guard, crashing into Veronica and sending them spiraling through the air. Fortunately, Veronica was quick to grab Summer by the sleeve and pull her into a tight embrace for the girl’s own safety. “Summer!? What the hell!? Why did you jump!?”

“Why were your eyes closed!?!?! I thought you had passed out or something. I was screaming your name!!” Summer yelled with tears in her eyes from the fear.

“Summer I can’t hear shit when wind is roaring through my ears! I was relaxing!”

“RELAXING!? YOU ARE FREE FALLING!!!!” Summer screamed. No doubt Veronica heard that.

“IT IS A LONG FALL, SUMMER! IT IS LITERAL HANG TIME!” Veronica yelled back. She finally noticed the tears coming from Summer. At first she thought it was because of the wind but they kept coming. “Are you crying right now!?”

“YES, DUMBASS! I THOUGHT YOU WERE FALLING TO YOUR DEATH!!!”

Veronica’s heart felt like it stopped for a moment. She had no response for that. Never in her wildest dreams did she expect Summer, anyone, to freak out over something like that. It was a little haunting. If she didn’t feel like a jerk before, Veronica definitely was feeling that way now, just a little. She looked over her shoulder to see Mantle buildings and ground coming in hot. Her arms fastened tightly around Summer’s upper and lower back. “Wrap your arms and legs around me, tightly!”

Summer did as she was told and felt Veronica’s hand press against the back of her head. What should’ve been several seconds before a splat became extended free falling. Summer went from seeing the sky, buildings, the pavement, and then minerals. Crushed sediments and pavement that were firmly placed within the dirt. Summer was experiencing seeing underground for the first time. “Woah…. you can do this all the time!? You see €€this all the time!? How deep are we?

“You are quite literally being impressed by things you can see with a shovel. Now flex your stomach and try not to get the wind knocked out of you.”

Once again, Summer listened and gave a pat on the back for confirmation. A weird feeling ran over her body. As if going down an elevator, then €€boom! That feeling became ten times worse. It was like a rollercoaster on the highest drop. But instead of going down, their bodies were being forced up. The world of minerals was left behind for streets once again. Their momentum kept going up until they came to a midair stop. Summer instinctively made a platform at their feet before they fell again.

Veronica finally let go and pulled Summer off of her body. “Well that’s one way to stop. I’ll admit, clever thinking.”

“What was your plan?”

“I would five back into the ground and back up. Each time would get less air then the last before eventually I would be like several inches from the ground, or I’d land on a roof on the way down. Simple stuff.” Veronica brushed off her outfit in an attempt to get the wrinkles out. The puffy eyes looked from Summer made her let out an auditable little laugh in disbelief. “Tsk, I cannot believe you actually cried.” She teased.

Summer squinted at Veronica before folding both arms and turning her head away dramatically. “I don’t see what’s so funny. Not in the slightest.”

“That’s because you have no sense of humor.”

“What’s humorous about a death like that? It’s terrible.”

Veronica shrugged casually. “Eh, there’s worse ways to go. But ummm thanks for checking, and stuff…” Veronica jumped off the glyph and onto a roof before Summer got any mushy ideas from a thank you. “The race is null in void. Move your butt. We have ground together since we made an emergency landing.”

“We’re skipping the fact you just showed me a little gratitude?” Summer teased. She couldn’t help it. The glare shot at her for it though reminded Summer that teasing a person she had to fight soon wasn’t a great plan. Unlike Valerie, Summer wasn’t gonna get any buffs or debuffs from it. “Hehehe….I’ll start moving my butt.”

“A wise decision.”

xxxx

“Alright, we’re here.” Weiss said, parking her car into the mostly empty school parking lot. “Nick, you have fifteen minutes to get what you need. Anymore and I’m coming in to drag you out myself.”

He laughed. “Can you at least send the gigas in? If you’re gonna be extra then go all the way.” He hopped out the car and ran inside.”

“Don’t tempt me!” Weiss shouted. She was not above embarrassing him like that. Not in the slightest.

Nick jogged his way down the halls. Benefit of the weekend, no crowded halls. Just him, the occasional faculty, and the sports team. Basketball, soccer, the usual suspects. However, the sight of favorite blue haired girl in an Atlesian military uniform and the kingdom’s flag had caught his attention. Seeing Eliza with her twin tails undone and in one regular ponytail was always so shocking to him. “Yo, Eliza!” He waved.

She looked at him briefly before doing a double take. “Nick? Aren’t you supposed to be in bed resting?”

If he had a nickel…. Nick walked up to her in disbelief. “Is everyone my mom today?” He joked. “I am fine. Just grabbing my assignments. Anyways, color guard practice today? Cool. Didn’t realize I wasn’t the only one doing double duty for the tournament; though I guess I’m technically doing triple.” The weight of that hit him a little. How’d he manage that!?

“Yeah, just for the opening ceremony. I’m the lead when it comes to the flags so hehe, all eyes on me.” It was hard not to hide her nerves about the whole thing. “In terms of weight, it’s not too different from my spear. The routine is almost solid.”

Nick could tell she said that more for her benefit than his. It was funny. Eliza wasn’t one to waver most of the time. Then again, this was her first time doing this and second time competing in this tournament. “Hey, you survived cameras on you before. You fought me last year without choking.”

“Yeah, and lost miserably.” Eliza would never forget that day. “Thanks for the reminder.” She said sarcastically.

“Shut up, you got third on your first major tournament. You couldn’t ask for a better debut against veterans like myself and Val. Oh, thanks for sticking around Vee by the way.”

“Don’t mention it. I did it more for me than you anyways.”

“Ouch. You’re so cruel to your work husband.”

Eliza’s face turned a little red. She pointed her finger at him and sparked it with magical electricity. “Never say that again.”

“Hahaha! I’m just teasing. I still appreciate the help. Anyways, I gotta go get my stuff and bail before my mom makes due on a not so empty threat. Bye!” He ran off past her towards his classrooms.”

“Council room” Eliza said, making Nick stop halfway down the hall. “All your work...I put it in the council room for you.” Even from a distance she could see Nick’s eyes light up. Did it really not take much to make this boy happy?

“Awww Eliza-” she pointed at him again with Fire this time. Nick thought it best to quit while he was ahead and continued walking. Although, he made a little mental note for later. “Hmmm, I wonder if Eliza would be good at candle training. Fire is fire after all. Magic or dust wise.” Nick continued pondering the idea. Magic has always been cool to Nick. The fact he actually knew a person could do it was especially cool. If he could trade being the heir for being the first person with magic in centuries, he might not think twice about it. Nick couldn’t help but fantasize about a life with lower expectations and no heavy title. “Vee is right. I should really talk to my uncle about this. Well, after the tournament, or maybe do it beforehand then soften the blow by winning gold? That would be good.” He turned a corner, failing to check for on comers. “Look at me, talking as if I don’t have to face-” Nick ran head onto Valerie hard and stumbled back.

His friend dropped a bunch of hockey sticks. Some of which hammering her toes. “Ow!” She screamed, her team hearing from several feet away. “Hey watch where you’re- Nick?”

“Hey Val…” He said nasally. The impact had him rubbing his nose gently as it turned red. “Tackling you must be a nightmare. You're like a wall of tanks.” His strange analogy was ignored entirely. He looked up at Valerie and saw nothing but shock and irritation as she pulled him close, real close.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were sick? I’m the one who told you to get rest? I didn’t know it was bad enough for you to be bed ridden.”

“I uhh well you see…” Focusing was hard enough from the crash. The literal inch between them made Nick feel unprepared. Though her face was upset, he still found beauty in it. Especially with the hint of care he saw her turquoise eyes. “You said you wanted space. So I thought I wouldn’t bother you.” He finally said, hesitantly. Valerie didn’t seem too happy with his response.

“Idiot.” Valerie said, “If it’s about your health then blow up my phone for all care!” She huffed. Valerie’s cheeks turned a little red. “Are we clear?” Nick didn’t respond back. His eyes avoided her gaze and he seemed uncomfortable. “Nick? You alright?”

He looked towards her, a little nervous. “Can I make it up to you? Since you were worried and all?”

“What are you-”

“Not as a date if that’s what you’re afraid of.” Nick reassured, “Clearly I upset you so let me fix it by taking you to your favorite dine in restaurant? These last couple days I…missed you okay?” He could feel his face turning red. Platonic or not, this sounded like a confession. And yet Valerie hadn’t let go of him yet. It might’ve been his imagination, but he could’ve sworn she had gotten redder.

Valerie could feel herself being apart mentally. Nick wasn’t one to lie, but enduring was what he did best. How often did he think about her while he was sick? Did she make his fever worse? Was not telling him more painful for him than it was her? Valerie didn’t know. Making sense of any of it wasn’t important. “Nick I-” her voice was cut off by the murmurs of the halls. Athletes and onlookers passed by with their whispers and giggles. They had once again made a spectacle out of nothing. Another thing for idiots to gossip about and spread their lies. Valerie couldn’t stand it. Her blood began to boil. It never failed. Nick had made life, her life, a little more about him and less about her. Valerie finally let go of him, pushing him away. “No, sorry.” She said, clearly irritated. “I still want my space; and we both know how you are. Date or not, you just can’t help yourself but pull out the red carpet act like if I need you when I don’t. It’s pretty…” Nick didn’t let her finish. He turned his back to her. It was only then Valerie realized just how much she was mouthing off. “Wait that came out wrong.” She double backed, “I…”

“You don’t get to do that.” Nick finally bit back, “Telling me I should’ve called and that you care, only to push me away at your convenience. Now you’re berating me? What is with you lately!?” His voice echoed through the hall. It was only then he paid attention to his peers who quickly moved along the moment he tried meeting their gaze. Suddenly, something clicked. “Are you...embarrassed by me?” He said, mid revelation.

“You’re causing a scene, Nick.” She muffled, unusually reserved. “Listen, I just think the tournament takes priority is all.” Valerie lies, unknowingly letting her pride get the better of her. “I’m not embarrassed by you, honest.”

“So why do you brush me off every time people are around huh? I’m not a mind reader. Just come out with it.” He got no answer. Just silence while Valerie’s eyes looked for people who might still be watching. Now he was really annoyed, and he wasn’t even sure if it was because of Valerie or himself for getting worked up in the first place. “You know what? Forget it. Have it your way. I’m too ill to argue.” He said dismissively. Nick walked away from the argument to get what he came for. He was on a time limit anyway.

Valerie watched her friend turn the corner, hurt by her words. Or maybe the lack of them. Valerie turned around to go back to practice and stopped after only one step, stunned by the sight of her mother carrying extra sports gear.

Nora let out an exhausted sigh then smiled, “Oh boy. Here I thought your biggest worry today would be run down knee pads.” She laughed awkwardly at her own ice breaker. “Wanna talk about it later.”

Valerie got closer. She took the gear from her mother and went towards the gym. “There’s nothing to talk about.”

Nora let Valerie get away. There will be time for questions later. Nora put her hands on her hips and shook her head. “Teenagers.”

xxxx

Neither twin was having the best mood right now. Summer could feel her heart beating out of her chest the deeper into the woods she went. Ever since the free fall, Veronica had gone silent. Any attempt at conversion was ignored. She just kept walking deeper and deeper until everything started to look the same to Summer. Thankfully no grimm had appeared, but if they kept walking aimlessly like this… “I think this far enough, Veronica.” Summer said. Veronica actually listened and stopped before turning around.

“Yeah, this’ll do nicely.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out the diamond dust while dropping her bag. “I say it’s about time we get this over with. Catch.” She tossed the vial of dust, underhanded.

Summer nearly panicked as she caught it midair. “What are you-don’t do that! This stuff is dangerous!” If her nerves weren’t shot before, they were now.

“The dangerous part is yet to come.” Veronica engaged Ember Celica and brought her fists up. She would’ve liked to remove the jacket, but a piece of her mind told her it was far wiser to keep the extra layer of warmth and protection. “Well?”

“Yeah, what are you waiting for?”Said the alluring lethal voice inside of Summer’s head, sending chills up her spine. This wasn’t the cold’s doing. No, this was fear. Pure unkempt adrenaline that made her stomach twisted into knots and body shiver. “She’s asking for it, so let her have it. Better her than fear sweet Nicholas, right?”

Summer couldn’t stop shaking in place. This wasn't the plan. Not like this so much could go wrong. Was she really to fight Shiva again? Did Veronica stand a chance? Just how much stronger would Shiva’s grip be by doing this. If they failed, if she wasn’t strong enough then…that might be it. This wasn’t just her own life at stake either. Summer already thought Veronica might’ve died today. If it was by her own hands…

Bile threatened to come up and out of throat. Summer couldn’t even see straight anymore. The trees spun around her and her balance felt off. The whole world seemed to crush her under her own weight and tears-

“Lesson learned.” Called out Veronica, bringing reality back to Summer. She hadn’t realized it through her panic attack, but Veronica had gotten remarkably close to her, looking right into her soul and placing a hand to rub Summer’s pale cheek. Summer was so overwhelmed she began stammering. “W-What a...are y-you-”

“This terrifying fear that’s crippling you; the absolute anxiety of knowing how potentially dangerous it would be to pull a stunt like this? Maybe remember it the next time you wanna drag Nick into one of your reckless training, kay?” Veronica took the Diamond Dust away from Summer and returned it to her pocket. “Okay, now for the real reason we’re here. We need things for your outfit and so on.”

Summer watched Veronica nonchalantly lift her bag and walk off again. She couldn’t be it. This entire was a set up. A guilt trip into thinking more about Nick’s safety, and it worked. The humiliation of it all. What’s worse was Summer felt...like she deserved it? Did Nick ever feel this, this fear? How many times did she want to train her control and he went along with it? Why did he go along with it!? Her body felt weak, exhausted. Summer stumbled back against a tree, sliding down until she sat in the snow on the verge of breaking down. “Stop.” She said, weak and afraid. “I need a minute, so please stop.”

Veronica looked back to see the state Summer was in. No longer was she fighting back tears. Summer openly wept as she hugged her knees tightly to try and stop the shaking. She wasn’t the only one feeling guilty.

“Damnit Veronica! I didn’t think it would scare her this bad or make her cry!”Veronica walked back to the fragile girl and sat next to her quietly. This was a complete disaster. Emotional vulnerability was never a thing Veronica was good at doing or dealing with. She took a chance and used her tail to wipe Summer’s wet face, gaining her attention. “I ummm, wasn’t trying to...a panic attack was not in my plans. You looked a little frantic at first but then you spiraled in the blink of an eye. I’m…” Veronica looked away, her ears folded in shame. “I fucked up. My bad. Nick told me to take it easy on you and here I am being worse than usual.”

Summer sniffled. She wasn’t exactly sure how to respond to being comforted. Especially by Veronica of all people. Still, it felt nice. Different from others. That’s for sure. “I’m sorry.”

That was out of left field. “What?” Said Veronica, turning back around. “Umm I don’t think you know how apologies work. I mean I barely do, but this isn’t right.”

“I said some things I didn’t mean about you yesterday. I was angry at myself and directed it to you. I may not know what bothers you but I know you probably have shit in your life going on too.”

“Yeah well...we’re famous. Problems come with the territory, and puberty.”

“Eh, can’t relate. High regen and pain tolerance. I don’t get cramps, or get sick. The only upside to getting blasted with dust no scientist can identify.”

“I probably shouldn’t envy you but maaaan, little jealous. Not gonna lie.”

The girls shared a small chuckle for what it was worth. Summer sniffled again and rubbed her eyes. “Ya know, we don’t really...talk, do we? Not since we were five. I’m sure there’s a lot of things we could learn.”

Veronica couldn’t suppress her unwilling groan. Bonding was not on her agenda. However, Veronica couldn’t help but think about Nick’s words and her promise to him. “Let’s make a truce? We have to spend time together. There’s no getting around it.”

“I’m painfully aware…” Summer moaned. “What’s the truce?”

Veronica stood up and reached for Summer’s hand, lifting her up as well. “I will do my damnedest to be less confrontational if you do as well. Also if you are willing to explain this whole Shiva business to me, then… I’ll explain my faunus business. I suppose.” Her tail instinctively wrapped around her waist for security. She could tell by Summer’s expression that she was definitely intrigued. It was warranted. Veronica didn’t speak much about it on purpose. Now she was offering it on a silver platter. “Well?” She said anxiously”

Summer retook Veronica’s hand and shook it. “Alright, truce.”

[therainroguefanfiction]

༄ Home » original

Genre: Angst, Slice of Life, Fluff ☁

Word Count: 3,101 ☁

Pairing: First Person ☁

World: Original ☁

Author’s Note: This was originally written as the start of a Prince of Tennis fanfic, thus the name Genjou Sanada, but I’m trash at series and will probably never see it through so I just made it a stand-alone one shot instead lol

WARNING: This fic talks heavily about anxiety and panic attacks. Read at your own risk.

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I was born with an anxiety disorder. When I was growing up, I simply thought that I didn’t fit in, so I changed myself and tried to join the various groups within my elementary school. First was the straight-A students – they were intelligent, hardworking, and above all, they followed the rules to a T. I tried hard, but I wasn’t very smart and my grades remained average.

Next were the skaters – they always carried a skateboard around with them and wore vans shoes. They didn’t really care about school, but they weren’t against it, either. They were just kinda there, existing through life. I tried hard again, but I couldn’t even stand on a skateboard.

After that, I started hanging out with the troublemakers – these kids hated school and all authority figures. They lived for chaos, stole from the teacher’s desk, and got into fights just because they could. I tried hard once more, but even after getting suspended for fighting and stealing pens from the teacher, it didn’t work out.

After that, I just gave up trying.

That was when my anxiety really started to bloom. Thinking back, I wonder why I chose to use such a beautiful word like bloom to describe something so ugly.

I started to panic whenever someone tried to talk to me and I begged my grandmother to homeschool me instead. She finally agreed, but this would come to be the biggest regret of my life. It nourished my anxiety, encouraged it to grow and grow until, eventually, it completed encompassed my entire existence.

I started to get super anxious whenever I would leave the house, and my mind would always betray me when someone tried speaking to me. I tried holding down a part-time job in middle school, but most of my time there was spent in the bathroom in tears and teetering on the edge of a mental break.

When my grandma died, none of my extended family wanted me or the problems that came along with my mental illness, so I became a ward of the state. I was one of the older kids, so potential parents never even spared me a glance – they only wanted a child past the terrible twos but before the angsty teen years, someone they could mold into their perfect little version of how their child should be. I had resigned to spend the rest of my young life in the orphanage.

But then… life changed for me. Or at least, it started to.

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“Children! Listen up,” Miss Maria clapped her hands to get our attention. She’s one of the high ranking matrons of the orphanage, specializing in the education of the older students, myself included. She was an older woman, just reaching the cusp of sixty, with gray hair kept in a tight bun and warm blue eyes the shade of the ocean. She was pretty strict when it came to rules, manners, and respect, but she was by no means abusive or cruel.

“We have some important clients visiting us this afternoon,” she continued. “Their company will be providing aide to Oakpine Orphanage, so you all must be on your best behavior.” Her eyes narrowed, sweeping across the assembled children. “Anyone caught misbehaving during this visit will be cleaning the orphanage from top to bottom with Miss Juliana! Dismissed,”

There was a flood of hushed whispers as the kids left the room. I was one of the last to leave the room, listening to the various gossip and conspiracy theories the other kids offered. The most prominent one was that the orphanage would close if they didn’t get this funding. The runner up theory was that the orphanage was being sold to some rich guy from overseas. Either way, all of the kids that were able to comprehend what either of those theories meant were on edge, bringing a tense aura across the building.

Around five o’clock that afternoon, five men dressed in suits arrived. I peaked around the corner into the entryway, watching curiously as they stepped into the small entrance hall where the reception desk was. The round man at the front of the pack introduced himself to Miss Maria and Miss Sarah as director Anthony Jones. The then introduced themselves in clockwise order.

The tall, thin man that resembled a skittish mouse was called Andrew Jamison. The short, stubby man with a bushy beard was Sean McNeil. The thin Asian man with thick glasses was Kiku Yamada. And the thicker Asian man was Genjou Sanada.

Miss Maria led the men toward her office at the back of the orphanage and I debated on whether or not I sure further press my luck by following them. Genjou was the last in the line and he paused, turning to look over his shoulder. His gaze met mine and my body tensed up, realizing I had been caught. He didn’t say anything, though, he just smiled at me before entering the office, the door shutting behind him. I really didn’t want to get stuck on cleaning duty for getting in the way, so I chose not to eavesdrop on them. As I turned around, though, two of the younger boys were sneaking past.

Clearly, the threat of cleaning didn’t bother them.

With a shrug, I grabbed one of the old books from the shelf inside the classroom and headed outside. Despite being the last leg of winter, it was quite nice outside. The breeze was a bit chilly, but the sun was shining from a bright ocean of blue above. I settled myself against the base of my favorite tree, and old weeping willow that was probably older than Miss Maria herself, and focused on the book.

It was an old murder mystery that had probably been with the orphanage since its beginning in the 1970s. The cover had faded and was peeling, the title on the spine barely visible. The pages were bent, torn, and stained a sickly yellow, and several of them had been scribbled on with crayon.

I quickly scanned the book to see if it was worth taking the effort to try and read through the mess. The entirety of chapters five, six, and half of seven had been torn crudely from the spine.

“Damn,” I muttered under my breath, dropping the book onto the grass beside me and letting my head fall back against the bark. I could see the sunlight peeking through the thick leaves, but then it was gone. It was trying to hide between a fluffy white cloud.

Feet crunched on the grass and I turned my head, finding Genjou approaching me. Is he going to scold me for eavesdropping on the adults? But he didn’t seem angry as he squatted down in front of me. In fact, he was smiling softly.

“Hello, Y/N.” His voice was deep and made me think of gravel, but it wasn’t painful to listen to. Actually, it was quite peaceful, calming even. I could detect an accent, but I wasn’t sure where from.

I swallowed hard at the attention as my nerves started up like a factory machine. Why did he know my name? Miss Maria had drilled in us since the day we arrived that we should always be respectful to guests, so I tried to keep my panic in check as I cleared my throat, sitting up straight. “Y-Yes, sir. Can I help you with something?”

“My name is Genjou Sanada. It’s nice to meet you.” His smile remained warm as he extended his hand toward me. I hesitantly shook it, noticed how large and calloused it was. “Miss Maria says you’re one of the oldest kids here. How old are you?”

“I just turned sixteen, sir.”

“May I ask how you came to live here?”

I chewed on my bottom lip nervously. It was so hard to maintain eye contact, but I was sure he would find it rude or offensive if I refused to look at him. “When my grandma passed away… I had nowhere else to go.”

His smile dropped a bit. “You have no other family?”

“I do, but… none of them really wanted me.” I couldn’t hold his gaze any longer, moving to stare at my jeans as I picked at a small hole on the side of my leg, tugging at the light blue piece of thread. I should have just left it at that, but the words spilled from my mouth before I could stop them. “My mom left me with grandma when I was really young and she never came back. I never met my dad.”

“I see. I’m sorry to hear that,” The man’s brown eyes shimmered with sadness as he regarded me and I cursed, my panic rising.

“A-Ah, no, i-it’s okay, really! I accepted it a long time ago. I… I’ve never really been the easiest kid to deal with, so I don’t blame them at all for not wanting me. Besides… there are plenty of other kids here with real tragic backstories, you know? Some of them haven’t even come to accept the reality, so it’s kind of sad.” I realized I was rambling but I just couldn’t seem to apply the brakes. His eyes had widened in surprise and I felt like I wanted to start crying for my stupidity. I scrambled to my feet, brushing off the seat of my jeans. “A-Ah, I’m sorry, please excuse me!”

And then I did what I do best, the only skill I’ve gained in life – I ran like my life depended on it, because in my brain, it did. I ran into the orphanage and to the second-floor bathroom, closing and locking the door behind me. I slid down the wooden door as panic wrapped its filthy claws around my body.

I felt ice-cold, my heart hammering painfully against my ribs. Tears stung at my eyes, rolling down my chubby cheeks even though I did my best to stop them from doing so. It felt like the world was closing in around me, the room getting smaller with every tick of the clock in the hallway. I knew it was all in my head. I knew that and yet it still felt like death’s boney hand was on my shoulder as he laughed in my ear, his breath the coldest chill I had ever felt in my life.

I tucked my knees to my chest, burying my face within them as I silently pleaded for everything to just stop.

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A week had passed since the five men visited the Oakpine Orphanage. The first couple of days, the mother matrons were clearly anxious about what the men had thought of their visit and if they believed we were fit to receive more funding. They were clearly distracted, allowing the troublemakers among us to get away with stuff they usually never would. After the sixth day passed, they were acting relieved and happy, and had returned to keeping a close eye on all of us. We assumed they had gotten the okay for the funding, but no one would comment on such.

On the seventh day, Miss Maria stopped me from leaving the room after class ended. The kids whispered and stared at me as they left, spinning their own theories as to why I was being kept behind, and she waited until the room was empty before addressing me.

Had she found out about my breakdown? Was she angry that I had so rudely run away from Genjou? I could only try to swallow my nerves as she began speaking.

She sat behind her wooden desk, hands folded in front of her as she sat with her back as straight as a pole. “Y/N, when Miss Garcia calls everyone down to supper, I would like you to stay behind.”

My body tensed up, hands gripping my torn jeans. “Am I… being punished for something?”

Her usually sharp expression softened. “No, dear, you’re not in trouble. I can’t say much right now, I just need to speak with you later.”

I wasn’t convinced, but I nodded anyway. “Yes, ma’am…”

“Good. You’re dismissed,”

I stepped out of the room, my mind running wild. She hadn’t seemed angry with me… but then why did she want to see me? And on taco night of all nights… I doubted it would be a simple five-minute meeting and by the time we were done, I was sure the more pig-headed of the children would have eaten all of the tacos.

With a sigh, I headed to my room, which I shared with nine other kids. There were five single beds on either side of the room, with a narrow space between them to walk down the middle of the room. My bed was at the back on the left.

Against the very back wall, under a large stained glass window, was a wooden box full of broken and dirty toys. Beside that were a row of dressers, one drawer for each child, and a small bookshelf that was standing on its very last life.

I fell onto my bed, the mattress hard and lumpy, as I stared up at the popcorn ceiling, a shade of faded white that more resembled coffee with a lot of milk. How many times had I just laid here counting the patterns that jutted out from the ceiling? I had probably counted every single mark at least three times by now.

The clock on the wall softly ticked.

Tick, tock, tick tock, tick tock.

It was driving me up a wall. Any other time, the kids would be screaming and playing so loud that the clock couldn’t even dream of being heard, but now it seemed as if the orphanage was silent.

I rolled over onto my side and closed my eyes, willing everything away.

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A light, airy chiming echoed throughout the orphanage, followed by Miss Garcia’s soft voice, “Dinner time!”

Like a stampede of buffalo, the kids dropped what they were doing and rushed toward the dining hall, nearly knocking the poor woman over in the process. I stood in the doorway, watching them as they excitedly talked about what toppings they wanted on their tacos. There were even debates over which was better – hard shell or soft. It seemed to be pretty evenly divided, and then there was one kid that tried to placate both sides by wrapping a soft shell around a hard shell, which only fueled the debate more.

A door opened down the hall and Miss Maria stepped out of her office. “Y/N, you saved me the trouble of having to come and get you. Come now, let’s not keep our guest waiting.”

My brow furrowed. There was a guest? I hadn’t heard anyone arrive, but I did manage to fall asleep for about ten minutes until one of the boys threw a soccer ball at the back of my head. Without a word, I followed her into the office, eyes widening when Genjou stood up from the chair in front of her desk.

He smiled warmly. “Hello, Y/N. It’s nice to see you again.”

“Hello,” I mumbled softly, turning my gaze to the brown carpet.

“Y/N, what have I told you about mumbling?” Miss Maria scolded, tapping my shoulder.

“Sorry, Miss Maria.”

“Go sit down, dear.”

“Yes, Miss Maria.” I slowly approached the desk, taking the seat on the left. The man reclaimed his seat, crossing one leg over the other. Miss Maria claimed her seat behind the desk, glancing at him before settling her attention on you.

“Now, Y/N, I’m sure you’re wondering why I’ve asked you here and why Mr. Sanada is here. Would you like to explain?” She wondered, quirking her brow at him.

He shifted in his chair so he could see you better. “I came here with a team of government officials to gather information on the current state of orphanages within the United States. It’s a joint effort between the Japanese government and the U.S. government to improve the well being of young children left in orphanages.”

I scratched my cheek, glancing at Miss Maria nervously. “I’m sorry… I don’t really understand what this has to do with me…”

“Patience,” she scolded.

“Sorry…”

“I didn’t plan on coming here to adopt anyone. In fact, I already have two children of my own, but…” He paused as if searching for the right words to express what he wanted to say. “After meeting you, I feel as if I would regret it if I didn’t adopt you.”

Wait, what? He… He wants to adopt me? I was left speechless, but one word passed through my lips before I could stop it. “Why?”

“I’m not sure, to be honest, but I feel as if you would be a wonderful addition to my family.”

I frowned at Miss Maria. “Did you tell me him about my issues?”

She nodded. “I’m required by law to disclose any medical information to potential adopters.”

“Then why?” My eyes snapped to his and I tried to get across how desperate I felt at that moment. “I don’t think you understand how bad I am. There’s a reason none of my relatives want me, my problems are too much to handle. I don’t interact with other human beings, I-I can’t even work! I’d be completely useless to you! There are… are so many wonderful children here that aren’t… broken like me. Surely they would be a better fit for -”

His large hand rested atop my head, gently ruffling my hair. I expected a look of pity or regret, but his gaze was full of warmth and understanding. “I’m well aware of how bad your condition is, but I would still like to bring you into my family. If you’re not comfortable, I certainly won’t force you, but the option is on the table. If you need time to think about it, that’s okay. It’s a big decision to make.”

Tears blurred my vision and I cursed at how sensitive I was being. This man, this stranger that I had met only once, was willing to put up my mental illness and give me a home, a family. But… what if I was more than he bargained for and sent me back? What if I make him hate me? What if –

Warm arms encircled my body, bringing me into a warm chest. I clung to his suit, unable to hold back my tears. This man, who I had met only once before, felt so warm and comforting.

He felt like home.

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