#if they changed the entire fucking Everything i would be performing a version of the cell block tango rn

[maximusboltaqon]

weird thing about the inhumans is that theyre obscure enough to not really have an audience and also havent really appeared *that* much throughout their entire 60 year existence. however they also well known enough that the mcu took a crack at it and permanently affected their comics and their old roles and sectors are gone to make room for the New MCU Versions. truly such a thing is practically unheard of.

[folkwhore1998]

I had a feeling so peculiar, that this pain would be for...evermore

Evermore!!!

Amazing! How lucky are we to live in a world where we get to experience evermore. Imagine being bored in quarantine and being able to just create an incredible work of art.

(in my opinion) We did not get an evermore long pond studio sessions because of the editing on folklore versus evermore. folklore had some vocal editing that didn't capture her voice the way evermore does. go listen to august on folklore and then august on LPSS. numerous songs on folklore have that editing style, but nothing on evermore does.

Evermore is so beautiful and one of my favorite aesthetics. Evermore is a late November-December vibe. I wonder how many songs Taylor actually made during quarantine. Do you think that evermore are the vault tracks from folklore? (As in the songs that just did not quite make it onto folklore)

I actually had a very hard time ranking these songs. I didn't really think I was going to have as hard of a time as I did. I have a pretty consistent ranking of the albums in general and evermore is pretty high up there, but maybe it should move up on the ladder because these songs are just so beautiful.

happiness is an incredibly emotional song that people seem to skip all of the time. In my personal experience, when I've been in long term relationships, I almost become disconnected with the version of who I was prior. When I've broken up these long term relationships, I've have to leave it all behind to rediscover the happiness we held before them. When I've felt so much pain from loss, I can get so blinded by the fact at one point in my life, a person or situation may have been good for me, in a black and white thinking sense. happiness has honestly helped me process hurt and loss, and has helped me to lean into the idea not everything has to be black and white. No one talks about it enough.

I really need to address the performance of evermore on the eras tour. Literal chills. It was one the best live performances she has ever done. I need a live version released on Spotify BIBLICALLY. I wish it would have made the cut for the eras tour movie.

evermore (the song) was one i kind of looked over for awhile. I honestly could not put my finger on what it was for me. After hearing Taylor Swift perform it live at the eras tour... my entire brain chemistry changed. I'm not even being dramatic. It was breathtaking and I cannot believe how quiet the crowd was in all of the videos i have come across. I love that there is a collective agreement that everyone was fucking stunned at how incredible it was.

Here are my rankings of evermore:

marjorie

coney island

happiness

right where you left me

evermore if it is taylor only

tis the damn season

champagne problems

tolerate it

long story short

it's time to go

willow

evermore if it is with bon iver and taylor

gold rush

ivy

dorethea

closure

no body no crime

cowboy like me

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

CHILLS.

I am so surprised that this marjorie made it onto the setlist, but I am so happy it did.

So eloquent- actually the first time I am seeing this.

Check out some of these awesome small businesses on Etsy!

Here is a cutting board with Taylor's chai cookie recipe: Chai cookies just have such an evermore vibe. I gotta get my hands on one of these!

Here is the link to a cowboy like me necklace: Forever is the sweetest con.

@taylornation @taylorswift

[strangermarvelss]

class of '86- e.m

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Female!Reader

Summary: you receive eddie’s diploma for him after his death

Warnings: angst, crying, angry reader, classmates being dickholes, mentions of blood and injuries, mentions of drug use, allusions to sex, wayne being a sweetie, not-so happy ending

Word Count: 4.8k

Request?: No

A/N: howdy! i am back with another one shot that has been on my mind since around august of last year which is insane, and since it is grad szn i thought it was appropriate to share now. slowly getting back into writing so i appreciate the patience. also note: i do not have any current plans to make a part two to this story, so please don’t bombard me with requests for it if you don’y mind :) enjoy! -sava

You have the same nightmare.

Every. Single. Night.

Every night you find yourself back in the upside down, Dustin hot on your tail as you rush over to the field in the darker dimensions version of the Forrest Hills Trailer Park, the body of the man you’d loved for several years lying on the ground as bites liter his body. Blood pooled in his mouth as he struggles for a steady breath, eyes wide as tears gather inside. You dove right down to him, scraping your knee as you clutched onto his figure and clung to him for dear life, your own breathing becoming unsteady as panic filled your entire nervous system.

You will never forget the scared look in his beautiful brown eyes, the ones you found so much comfort in for years as they shined in the bright yellow sunlight during the summers in Hawkins, or how the lights of the colorful stage lights at the Hideout would reflect off of him and enhance his performance in way. You’ll never forget the scared look on his face turning into joy when he saw you, trying to play it cool for a split second and put on a brave persona for you and his little lost sheep he helped bring to the right people.

You absolutely will never forget feeling his breath becoming more shallow as you held him, and how he was reassuring you and Dustin during his final moments. Holding you tight and looking at you lovingly until his grip on your hand loosened and his breathing coming to a halt. You felt you heart break into a million piece when his eyes glossed over and lost the feeling of his heartbeat, letting a violent scream rip through you as the pieces clicked together in your head. The love of your life was gone and there was nothing you could do to bring him back.

Dustin held you as you sobbed, his silent tears creating a puddle on your shirt as he let you grieve and process your own emotions about the matter. Later on he told you he wanted you to have your moment, that he felt bad about grieving him in front of you since you’d known him longer than he did, which made you emotional all over again while reassuring him it was okay to feel the bad feelings and holding him like he did with you as he finally showed you how messed up loosing Eddie had made him, breaking your heart all over again.

The two of you stayed in the Upside Down for a while, not wanting to abandon Eddie and leave him behind along with the rest of the fucked up dimension he would be stuck in. You tried to drag his body out, pulling him towards his trailer, but Dustin tried his best to reason with you, even thought his head wasn’t in the best place either. It was ultimately Steve Harrington of all people to help knock some sense into you, with Robin and Nancy quickly following behind him as they joined you once again. 

You’ll never forget the look of pity that covered their faces as they looked to Eddie’s body on the ground below you, then shooting you a sympathetic look as they instantly put everything together.

You will never forget the night your life changed forever.

Smoothing the hem of your sundress out, you take a look at yourself in the mirror of your bedroom, trying your best to put on a brave face for the events that would take place today. Any senior who was enrolled in Hawkins High School before the bell rang on the last day before spring break was getting a diploma, failing grades or not. They delayed the ceremony until after a lot of the bigger messes from the “earthquake” cleared, with the people in charge wanting to try and have a happy occasion for the town to celebrate for a change, giving all the tragedies that the town has faced over the past 3 years. They thought it was vital and needed to attempt to paint Hawkins as a happy town once again.

This meant that Eddie Munson, your Eddie, would be getting a diploma too. The school called Wayne directly to tell him the news, asking if he wanted to come by the high school sometime within the next couple of weeks to pick up the certificate instead of making it a public occasion. If you weren’t by the phone when it happened, you knew Wayne would’ve agreed, having lost his surrogate son and still wrapping his head around the entire situation. But you convinced him that it should be done at the public ceremony with the other students. Eddie had made it a point to actually graduate this year, and he deserved to be part of the ceremony like everyone else.

You knew going into that suggestion he would ask you to accept it on Eddie’s behalf, with half the people in Hawkins still giving Wayne a mix of hateful and sympathetic looks, as he still had matters to attend to. You on the other hand? You rarely left the house, only for groceries and the occasional meet up with Dustin. Watching someone you both admire die in front of you bonds you for life, and you wanted to be there for him and vice versa. The rest of your friends…you rarely saw, sticking to the comfort of your home as you were still coping with the stages of grief. They understand, not having lost someone so intimately like that, aside from Nancy loosing her best friend, Barb. If there was anyone besides Dustin you talked with, it was her.

Opening the door to your bedroom, you walk down the hallway and shovel a few necessities in your purse before grabbing your keys. You exit the trailer, locking the door before walking down to the new trailer Wayne was given as compensation for well…his other one being split in half. Knocking on the door three times, you take a deep breath as you wait for him to come outside and greet you. You could feel the nerves rising up, sending a weird feeling through your stomach as you thought about the different possibilities of how this could go. In a hopeful scenario, you would walk on stage and snatch the diploma right out of Principal Higgins’ hand, then quickly run off the football field after giving the other students the bird, just as Eddie said he would do back before spring break. But you knew you had to remain professional and kind, for Wayne’s sake.

The creak of the door makes you look up, seeing Wayne step out of the house with his light blue button-up shirt on and worn down slacks that you can only assume he’d owned for years now. This was the most dressed up you’ve seen him in the years you’ve known him through Eddie, with t-shirts with jeans and his work uniform for his nights at the plant being the only two versions you’d been used to. Smiling, you take a step back and walk down the steps of the small concrete porch he’d managed to create, trying his best to replicate the old trailer as much as possible. He meets you at the bottom of the few steps, extending an arm to give you a side hug. You flash him a half smile before returning the gesture, taking in the scent of soap and mint before pulling away. 

“You clean up pretty nice Wayne,” you tease, slightly chuckling a bit. He smiles, shaking his head.

“You hush,” he tells you, pointing at you before pointing towards his truck. The two of you walk over, throwing open the passenger door and carefully climbing inside. 

“I like that dress,” he tells you as he gets in the driver’s seat, his slight southern accent creeping out with each word. “I don’t think I’ve seen you wear many dress in all the years I’ve known ‘ya. Mainly just some of Eddie’s old band shirts and that Hellfire shirt he made.”

You can’t help but laugh at his words, knowing he is absolutely right. It was never something you did often, just on the occasional date with Eddie, prom, and your own graduation back in ’84. Nodding, you smooth out the skirt of your dress before turning to him as he starts the engine. “Yeah, these never were really my style. Hell, the last time I wore this Eddie and I were making out in the back of his van at Lover’s Lake last summer.”

Thinking back to the memory, you can’t help but let your smile spread from cheek to cheek, replaying how his ring-clad hands always kept trying to sneak inside the skirt of the dress in order to get to “the goods”, as he referred to it.  He had tied his hair back into a low bun, something he knew that always made you swoon and completely weak in the knees. He’d packed a bunch of both of your favorite snacks and called it a picnic, which you enjoyed nonetheless. A couple of beers he snuck out of the fridge when Wayne wasn’t looking and a couple of edibles in your system, it quickly lead to Eddie shutting the van doors and pulling orgasm after orgasm from your body in the back part of the van. 

You remember Eddie being upsetting about being held back once again, starting to look down on himself and doubt his ability to ever cross that finish line. You knew you had to step in with reassurance, because hearing him talk poorly about himself always made you feel hurt. So you suggested dedicating a day to spend together, from sunrise to sunrise the very next day. You told him you could do whatever his heart desired, within rationality of course, and you would be there no matter what. No negative thoughts in sight or rainy days, just the two of you curled up in his van and eating, laughing, and being at the center of bliss thanks to each other’s company.

The smile is quickly wiped from your face, snapping back to reality and letting the loneliness sink back into your heart. You visibly frown, turning your head away from Wayne as you felt a pricking feeling tickle the backs of your eyes. Wayne continues the journey to the high school, letting the silence fall comfortably in the car to give you some peace. Wayne usually wasn’t a big talker, even before the loss of his nephew, so it didn’t feel awkward to just let the sound of the motor running in his old pickup as the two of you let your thoughts go wild inside your heads, thinking about the man that was just the topic of conversation.

You feel the truck halt to a stop, snapping out of the far off land your mind wandered to. Looking over to Wayne, he puts the truck in park and opens his door. Looking our the front windscreen, you see the old brick building of Hawkins High School, a placed where you used to wander about for four consecutive years not that long ago. You used to bring Eddie lunch on the occasional off day you had from work, taking a moment to see the old stomping grounds and visit your favorite guy in the world. Now being in front of the building left a bad taste in your mouth. Knowing how much Eddie hated coming to school, especially without you. Dealing with the constantly bullying from all the kids that had already reached their peak and pushing past that typical high school bullshit until he took his dying breath. It angered you to your core.

Finally stepping out of Wayne’s truck, you follow him around the side of the school and down the path that leads to the football field. You hold your hands together in front of you, wringing your fingers as you try and settle the nerves that reside in your lower stomach. You were bound to run into the people who saw you at your most vulnerable state, knowing Nancy and Robin were graduating and Steve and the kids would be in the crowd alongside you and Wayne. As bad as it is to admit, the only people you’re comfortable enough seeing on a regular basis are Wayne and Dustin, so having to finally face everyone else sent waves of nausea through your system.

Making your way into the stands, you make eye contact with Principal Higgins, who shoots you a sympathetic look before chatting amongst his colleagues once more, probably talking about you if you had to assume. Scoffing, you take your seat next to Wayne, trying your best not to be seen by much of the crowd. Wayne takes notice of your nerves and places a reassuring hand on your shoulder, making you smile softly.

“So uh, did they give you a run down of what will happen with getting his diploma?” He asks.

“Um, yeah. I had a meeting with Higgins and a few other faculty members and they’re doing the memorial diplomas first, then the rest of the graduating class. Everything is going to be alphabetical, so I’ll go up towards the middle of that-“

You’re distracted for a moment, stopping mid-sentence as you see a familiar hairstyle bobbing through the crowd, with a hoard of kids trailing behind him. Steve Harrington turns, seemingly yelling at the kids to stop playing around and find a place to sit, before looking out at the crowd you found yourself in. You feel your body run cold as his eyes lock on yours, as if you body was plunged into a frozen lake. He waves at you, smiling for a moment before watching his brain piecing together why you’re here, which causes him to send a pitiful but sympathetic look your way.

Cautiously, you wave, watching the kids’ heads turn to look where Steve was and copying the older man’s expression. All but Dustin, who seems very happy to see your face out in the world like he’s been trying to convince you to do for a few weeks now. But the smile quickly fades when his eyes wander over to Wayne, guilt filling his eyes as he quickly turns away. You have told the boy several times that he is not at fault and shouldn’t beat himself up over what happened, but it just makes you sound like a hypocrite for not taking your own advice.

Finally willing yourself to look away after watching them take seats a few rows in front of you, you hear the football stadium speakers begin playing the instrumental music you recognized from your own graduation, peaking down at the field and seeing the green caps and gowns flow out in two uniformed lines. Taking a deep breath, you stand from your position and walk towards the stairs of the bleachers and stand by the faculty member that would lead you and the rest of the family members that are collecting other student’s diplomas who also couldn’t be here in person.

Watching the graduates take their seats, a tapping sound comes from the makeshift stage they set up on the field, watching Principal Higgins smile out to the crowd before looking down at the notes he placed on the podium.

“Good afternoon Hawkins High graduating class of 1986,” he welcomes, pausing as cheers erupt from the about to be former students, as well as the proud families situated on the bleachers. “You have come so far within the past four years, and given the circumstances that our town has faced, it is truly an honor to be standing in front of you all today as you start the next chapter of your lives. Each time you walked through the doors of Hawkins High School, you were determined and dedicated to learning and creating memories that will last a lifetime, so it is time to keep those close to your heart as you say goodbye to those high school years one last time.”

If only everyone who went here had lasting memories, you thought to yourself. It seemed as if he was pandering towards the popular crowd, speaking directly to those who experienced the “ultimate American high school experience”, which made the nausea settled in your stomach even worse. There are kids you know for certain that are in this very crowd of green caps and gowns who did not have the best time, having gotten bullied and ridiculed for the past four years while the administration turned a blind eye. Or there were others who have lost more than they could’ve imagined, and the painful memories of their high school years will stay with them in the darkest of ways.

“Before we begin the speeches and the passing out of diplomas, I want to take this time for the families of those who unfortunately did not make it to this ceremony today. The students who gave their life for this town have been such an incredible presence to not only our school, but our community. So to the families of these students, my sincerest apologies for your losses, and we would like to serve you with the diplomas that they worked so hard to earn over the years.”

Turning back, you look up at Wayne from where you were once seated, watching him hold the tissue close to his chest as he gently began to cry. He knew his nephew was not the most liked person, and you knew he just wished Eddie could be here to prove each and every person that ever doubted him wrong.

“Jason Carver,” Higgins says into the microphone. Scoffing, you keep your attention away from the stage for Eddie’s sake. Of all the people who couldn’t make it here today, you were the least bit sympathetic towards what happened to Jason after all those years of lies and physical violence he showed your Eddie. You also didn’t need to see his older brother, Jake, whom you graduated with a couple years back, act like all macho and pretend he is still the king of the school…even two years later.

“Chrissy Cunningham.”

You turn back to the stage, watching Chrissy’s mother walk up the stairs as she weeps with every step she takes. Taking the diploma from him, she and Higgins exchange a quick hug before another faculty member escorts her off the stage. You felt bad that Chrissy was caught in the crossfire of everything that went down. Being Vecna’s first victim in the recent attacks. But what really hurt was knowing that from the moment she was taken by the slimy creep, Eddie still blamed himself, wishing he knew sooner so he could’ve saved her from all this mess.

“Barbra Holland.”

You glance over at Nancy, who you spotted as you walked to your current position. Her big round eyes grew with sadness, looking down to her lap as you watch the guilt consume her. Yet another person you felt for, because if anyone would’ve been able to stop something from happening, it would be Nancy. At the same time, however, you think the loss made her the ferocious fighter that she is today, the anger and pain of losing Barb driving her to the strength and courage she has shown each time this shit keeps coming back, which you applaud.

As Patrick’s name is called, she looks back up and out to the crowd, fixating her big blue eyes right on you. Smiling ever so slightly, you through a gentle wave her way as she does the same, her dimples creeping onto her features as she shoots you a toothless smile. Maybe there was room to have some peace and happiness come out of this day-

“Eddie Munson,” Higgins says stalely in the microphone. The entire stadium falls silent, compared to how the other kids got cheers and claps. The quiet is all consuming, on top of hundreds of pairs of eyes glue onto your figure, staring blankly at your frozen figure.

Making your way to the stage, you carefully take each step one at a time, taking a deep breath in before walking towards Principal Higgins as his arm extends with the diploma in hand. You can almost hear Eddie’s voice edge you on, gaining more and more of a sense of pride as you inch further. “Almost there,” “Third time’s the charm,” you imagine him saying to you, a wide happy grin stretched on his cheeks as the victory of finally graduating reaches its destination.

“Who let the freak’s girlfriend on the field?” you hear someone ask from the sea of graduates. Ignoring it, you reach your hand out, mere inches from touching the rolled paper tied in a bright red bow. Now is the moment everything has led to, all the bullying and negative thoughts and perceptions Eddie endured within his last 6 years. This is what he’s been craving to achieve since last summer. This is-

“DING, DONG! THE FREAK IS DEAD”

“DEADIE MUNSON, DEADIE MUNSON!”

You halt. Frozen mid step as ice floods your system once again. A stabbing pain begins permeating throughout your chest, trying your best to tune the horrible chants and phrases out before the words are replaced with a long ringing in your ears. It feels hard to breathe as you stand there, all the eyes of the administration, parents, and graduates looking at you like some form of entertainment, waiting on the edge of their seats to see what your next move will be. It felt embarrassing, which you could only assume was the goal. They had no problem continuing to tease Eddie, even after his death.

Finally finding the strength again, you take a deep breath before turning around, eyes locking on the podium as the rage inside you begins to bubble. Principal Higgins immediately steps to the side, the fearful look in his eyes telling you he had no issue with what you were about to do. Hell, now it made you think he was scared of Eddie after all those years instead of just simply hating him. 

You plant yourself in front of the stand, looking out at all the laughing bodies that fill the stands and the chairs splayed out on the grass field. Their immaturity was telling, acting as if they weren’t taking the next step into adulthood in just a few minutes. There were only a few who didn’t join in with the laughter, which made your heart feel something for the first time in a while. Nancy was looking at you sympathetically, as did Robin and Jeff within the sea of green below you. As for in the crowd, Steve’s eyebrows furrowed as a frown rests on his lips, looking over at the gaggle of children who were also silently sending your their respects. Having them by your side in the crowd was giving you some much needed courage, allowing for you to take another breath before feeling ready to finally air your grievances.

“How dare you,” you say quietly into the microphone. The crowd is once again silent, the careless dickheads that were just taunting you freezing in place and stopping their sentences. You don’t care about the dirty looks the faculty members on stage with you are shooting you, the rage inside your chest is bubbling faster and faster made it impossible to let the cruelty slide.

“How dare you all sit there and talk so poorly about someone who is no longer here. Each and every one of you have no idea the pain Eddie’s friends and family have been through with his loss, and you sitting there and making jokes of it all is the cruelest thing any of you have done to that man,” you tell him, looking around the crowd and singling out those you know are responsible. “You all didn’t know Eddie for who he truly was. Instead you judged him for who you thought he was because of his looks, or his surface level interests. Like god forbid someone prefers to go crazy over metal music and a fantasy game instead of pop hits and sports games. Eddie never believed in everyone liking the same stuff, he embraced his interests and bonded with people who were different like him, all because you assholes judged him for years and made him think that, for the longest time, it wasn’t okay.”

“You have no idea what kinds of things Eddie gave for this town. A town that hated him and made his life a living hell for nearly twenty one years. All the shit he went through as a child, all the humiliation you all put him through in middle and high school. All because he didn’t conform to the bullshit suburban standard all of you were brainwashed into thinking was okay thanks to your parents, who are sitting in the crowd and judging him alongside the rest of this graduating class,” you pause, taking a breath and wiping a tear away. “Eddie gave his life trying to save this town, wanting to prove to you all that he wasn’t a coward or that he wasn’t some evil being you all made him out to be. He was the most amazing person I’ve ever met and I almost feel sorry for you all that you never got to know Eddie for who he really was. He protected and cared so deeply for the people he was closest with and…and I miss him so much. He should’ve been here to accept this diploma, to show you all that he could do it and laugh in the faces of all who doubted him. But instead, I’m here accepting my dead boyfriend’s diploma, so I’ll leave you with my final thoughts.”

“I hope you all know that your years of torment will come back to bite you. Good luck on whatever endeavors life throws your way, and go fuck yourselves,” you spit out into the microphone. Feeling like it was the most appropriate thing to do, you turn to Principal Higgins, flip him the bird, and run off the stage. As you walk towards the exit of the stadium, you spot Wayne rising from his spot in the stands, nodding with a smile as he begins his journey to the front gate, your purse in his hand. 

The heavy weight that strained your breathing has finally lifted from your chest, the relief of getting your true feelings off your plate and expressing that so openly has you walking with so much more confidence and ease. You didn’t care what the people in the stadium thought about you are your impromptu speech, because the students of Hawkins High, and a majority of the citizens of Hawkins, were no longer of importance to you, not that they were that much to begin with. You had Wayne, Dustin, and eventually the rest of your friends now that you’re starting to deal with the grief in a healthy way.

Smiling at Wayne, he hands you your purse and begins walking with you out of the gate, his arm around your shoulder as you quickly walk towards his truck. It made your heart warm to see Wayne’s approval of the scene you caused on stage, knowing the fear of his disapproval has already been bubbling in your stomach for the past week. But for a reserved man, he sure did like to see a show of things every once in a while and have a good laugh about it later. Hopping into his truck, you buckle your seatbelt and hand Wayne Eddie’s diploma, smiling as you see the proof of his high school success sitting right in front of you.

“Now what would Eddie want to do to celebrate?” I think we should honor him by spending the rest of the day basking in the accomplishment in the truest form of Eddie.”

“Well I can think of a few things, but those are definitely not on my list,” Wayne jokes, making you chuckle.

“How about going over to the music store and buying a couple of tapes? Then we can stop and get a six-pack at the store and a few snacks and just spend the rest of the day doing nothing. I think that’s the tamest thing he would do,” you suggest.

With a nod, Wayne changes the gear of the truck and pulls out of his space and down the parking lot of the high school, entirely missing a long haired shadow peer from around the back of the school’s brick building.

[rupertgayes]

How would you pitch watching Due South to someone who doesn't know it?

THE PREMISE: mountie from the northern reaches of canada goes to chicago to avenge dead dad (also a mountie), gets into buddy-cop shenanigans with a detective. said detective leaves the show in season 3 and gets replaced by another detective, shenanigans continue to ensue. there's also a dog. he's very cute.

THE PITCH: honestly, after being in the spn fandom and having most of popular culture awash with prestige shows (that are not spn, but like spn are typically dark and gritty and like killing characters off too) and having most of the popular media landscape try to cover their collective asses by having an aloof, 'you-can't-make-fun-of-this-because-we're-not-taking-it-seriously-ourselves' air, it was truly refreshing to sit down with a close friend of mine and check out this show.

i'm being completely serious when i say there's a certain je ne sais quoi about this show. is it because it's from the 90s? perhaps. is it because it's canadian? maybe. i wasn't even alive when this show first started airing and i'm not a media analyst. it basically takes the premise of the dudeley do-right cartoon and asks 'okay, but what if that was like, a real guy?' and fucking runs with it to the wildest heights. it's a comedy, but it's also so bizarre in some ways that it makes it a truly unique treat to watch. i love psych and brooklyn 99 for having a comedic procedural aspect, and neither of them are comparable in whatever it is that due south is doing.

there's honestly a lot of heart and soul in the entire show, and it has the ability to shift from just being comedic to having drama, mystery, and moments that pull at your heartstrings. it's a show that you can enjoy on the surface as a fun episodic show with fun characters and fun moments, but it also lends itself quite well to extrapolating on the characters, their motivations, etc. (and by etc i'm also including any shipping you might want to do).

i won't say it's a paragon of DEI, but again, i think it has a level of earnestness which makes any slip-ups it does have something i can kinda view with indulgence, versus shows that are making the same (or worse) mistakes 20+ years after this show already ended. these characters are treated with a level of dignity and respect, and i think overall the characterization is pretty consistent - there are some shifts happening between seasons 1-2 and 3-4, but i feel like it has more to do with budgets, a change in creative team, etc., versus writers not 'getting' certain characters.

there's also a lot of memorable episodes, scenes, bits. i think the latter seasons are more campy (my favorite) and some eps from s1 and 2 make for legitimately some great television. even the more mid episodes have something worthwhile, too. some of my fave moments in no order:

fraser (the mountie) saving and talking to? a rat in a strip club

also him going to a leather club

twice

and meeting a mountie in a latex version of his red serge uniform

using a tarp as a parachute

mafia egg conspiracy

aliens??

due south but make it silence of the lambs a little bit

performance arsonist

lake pirates? ghost ship?

also why are most of the major bad guys here doing some form of environmental crime? get your captain planet on ig, i'm into it

also fellow cops can also be bad guys. acab ig??

sick muscle cars eric kripke himself would've enjoyed. sometimes they get set on fire tho

due south but make it to wong foo thanks for everything

fraser running away from women so he doesn't have to kiss or interact with them

way too much time in closets, in general.

fellas is it gay to ask your new partner of one week maybe to pretend he's a woman so he can decide if he finds you attractive

there are red ships and green ships but no ships like partnerships :)

and to reiterate about the dog: there's a dog who's half wolf and all deaf and fraser can talk to him 'because he (the dog) reads lips'

his dead dad shows up too sometimes

anyway, it was really nice to watch this show for the first time, there are still moment i scream-laugh at because they're just so ridiculous and i'd never catch any other moments like that in any other show. i definitely see why there's still active fans for it thirty years later. there's also some wild shipping fodder here, which is at least partially why there are still fics getting written for these guys today. destiel if the cw weren't cowards etc etc. when i watched the finale, i cried tears of joy because while i'd miss the characters, they got an ending that actually seemed to fit, instead of it being a rush job, which is not unique to spn but, you know.

also you can watch it for free on youtube rn.

[male-hedonism-and-acting-cool]

so i saw you have headcanons on ur page, so i prompt you for more, unload all ur cattonquick headcanons can be nsft go wild mate

sorry it took me so long but here are almost 2k words of my cattonquick headcanons

Felix

dyslexia/adhd combo. has no idea until like late 20s/early 30s. gets medicated, and it changes his entire life (he even gets some kind of rich boy job)

but during oxford he's just struggling and insufferable. Oliver has to do some of his assignments for him (not often. usually when Felix forgets about them entirely and doesn't find someone to pay for doing them)

had chlamydia. do I really need to explain this one? boy fucks around a lot

wants to get his nipples pierced

likes horror stories and spooky urban legends and stuff but also gets scared shitless by them

he was around 10 when his dog died. was literally heartbroken, didn't eat for like a weak. swore to never have a pet again

once during boarding school procrastinated all of his works for the last moment drank five redbulls was awake for 43 hours to finish everything and went to two finals. slept for two days straight woke up with no memory of doing any of this and didn't have a caffeinated drink again for a couple of years (he still barely passed if you care)

has super boring stories about drunk nights out (because he's rich and popular, so there's always something looking after him). but he thinks they are crazy

turns into crazy people pleaser if you as much as hint that you don't like him

​Oliver

autistic

thinks he's great at masking (he does know it's masking because he's also not diagnosed but he's highly aware that he performs different versions of himself for people and believes it's him being an evil genius or something)

is actually shit at masking. he can put his shit together and act a certain way for some time (like he did with other Cattons). but most of the time he's a little freak type of guy, and everyone notices

he also won’t talk to anyone unless he absolutely needs to (he almost failed a class because he needed to do a group project but didn’t like the group he was assigned to, so he tried to email “sorry to miss our group meeting but here’s my part of the work” his way out of talking to any them)

since they spend almost all the time together, Felix knows him in his closest to not masking state

I think his dad does have drinking problems, but he's more like a functional alcoholic so no one cares

likes reading long books. like 600+ pages long. they provide him with a sense of stability

I know he doesn't look like it, but he did have friends at school. mostly children of his parent's friends or people from his classes. he doesn't keep in touch with any of them, and it's his decision (he misses them sometimes, but it's more like he misses the idea of having friends than actual people)

started using contact lenses because Felix would always mention how he likes the color of his eyes

really picky about food and would rather starve than eat something he doesn't like. skips meals at oxford all the time if eggs at the dining hall are cooked in the wrong way or something like this

tries to quit smoking at some point later in life but decides it's not worth it with all the passive smoking from living with Felix

talks in his sleep. not much and not often, but still

becomes a writer and write really fucked up stories with dark academia vibes (partially because he turned into a fucking gremlin when he discovered academic validation and never let it go + partially as a love letter to Felix, his uni sweetheart who, let's be honest, kinda peaked at uni)

gets close with his second sister when she grows older (she and the youngest one have a similar age difference to Oliver and the oldest sisters, and their parents treated them similarly. so they bond over being ignored and forced into taking care of their younger siblings) parents treated them similarly. so they bond over being ignored and forced into taking care of their younger siblings)

cattonquick

Felix is one year older than most people in his class. because he took a gap year after school to "experience life" (get drunk in nine different European countries) and "get to know himself" (receive a couple of mediocre hand-jobs from other rich boys and make some conclusions about his sexuality). he would've been one year Oliver's senior but when Oliver was five he had severe pneumonia and was too weak to start school (like a fucking victorian child). so he started a year later and they are the same age

they do awful couple Halloween costumes (there are also people dressing as them for Halloween as couple costumes, that’s how annoying they are)

they are "facebook official" if you care (it was a big deal for possessive mentally unstable people back then, trust me, my favorite movie is the social network)

Felix has insane separation anxiety (like those dogs on tiktok that grew up during covid with their owners always around)

he would sit in Oliver's laps at parties, play with Oliver's clothes or hair while he's doing his work, ask Oliver to join him in the shower because I need to wash my hair so it's gonna be a long shower and I'll miss you and then you'll go to the shower and I'll miss you even more

but once in a while he gets angry because he feels "too needy" so he ignores Oliver for the whole day or asks him to leave if they are together

then (you guessed it) he starts missing Oliver

at first, Oliver was freaking out every time this happened, but over time he figured out to just give Felix some time and come back later. it still hurts him though that Felix believes he can just send him away whenever he's tired of him

after days like this Felix does everything to show that he loves Oliver and wants him around. he cuddles him more, takes him to a bar or to one of their special places, buys him something (he keeps track of everything Oliver mentions he likes by texting Farleigh. Farleigh fucking hates it)

but still the best way to show Oliver that he won't suddenly get bored of him once and for all one day is to stop doing shit like this. and Felix fails to do it. so they pretend it never happened until it happens again

Oliver always pulls Felix for a kiss by the collar or by his hair. he never st­ands on his toes

they did acid toge­ther once. Felix was sure Oliver would love it but Oliver had an awful trip full of maze imagery and never tried psyched­elics again

for their first va­cation together, they go to France (mostly because Felix does­n't really care for traveling, and he kno­ws that Paris is the city of love or wha­tever). there're huge protests the second day they arrived. so they only go to Louvre and spend the whole two weeks in their hotel room

after Oliver and Felix date for a while and it's clear that Oliver isn't going anywhere Oliver and Farleigh start to develop some love/hate friendship. they mostly hang out toget­her, talk shit about everyone (including each other), and di­scuss poetry

Felix is insanely jealous. Farleigh is offended Felix thou­ght he would be into Oliver. Oliver finds it hilarious (he doesn't think it's hot because he already knows how possessive Felix is, which is hot, but this makes Felix nervous so Oliv­er isn't into it)

Oliver bites. not only during sex but in general. they can sit holding hands and talk and he will just bite Felix's ha­nd and continue talk­ing like nothing hap­pened. because Felix is a little spoon, he will often wake up from Oliver biting into the back of his neck and have a mark for the entire day. Felix gets used to it surprisingly eas­ily (and by gets used to it I mean he finds it unearthly hot, to­uches marks that Oli­ver leaves on him all the time and serio­usly thinks about ge­tting a tattoo of Ol­iver’s bite marks)

and yes he does call Oliver a vampire

Oliver has a couple of slightly worn t-shirts three sizes bigger for Felix to borrow (when they st­art living together a couple slowly turns into a whole drawe­r)

they never really lived in saltburn to­gether. but they went here for summer

when they start li­ving together (right after oxford they move into a two-story apartment) Oliver insists they both sho­uld have an office as some personal spac­e, mostly because he needs to get his wo­rk done. Oliver’s of­fice is very old-fas­hioned, with dark wo­oden furniture and tall bookshelves. he also gets a reproduc­tion of the Saltburn maze game. Felix do­esn’t know what to put in his office bec­ause he doesn’t need a fucking office. his only idea is to commission a portrait of Oliver, so for a couple of years (until he gets medicated and finds a rich boy job) his office has blank wall­s, a portrait of his boyfriend with a de­sk and a single chair across from it and nothing else. he en­ds up spending most of the time Oliver works on the couch at Oliver’s office any­way

Oliver has a lock of Felix's hair in a locket. very 18th century gothic poet style (Felix knows ab­out it btw. it was an anniversary gift)

Felix introduces Oliver as boyfriend, then fiancé, and then husband. Oliver al­ways introduces Felix as his life partner

they get married after six years toget­her

Felix is the one to propose (he waited for Oliver to do it, but Farleigh once told Oliver that he would look like a des­perate social climber if he proposes and Oliver internalized it immediately)

Oliver writes Felix love letters even after they’ve been together for years. full of admiration for small daily things Felix does, about how godly is even the way Felix brush his teeth; about small nice things that hap­pened to him because there’s no one in the world he would ra­ther share it with (much like Nabokov’s Letters to Vera)

Oliver doesn't bel­ieve in soulmates, and Felix claims to be personally victimiz­ed by it. but Oliver just loves to see it as a result of hard work they put into it. he doesn't think they were simply destined to be togeth­er, he believes it's years and years of them choosing to be together, choosing each other when there were so many easier options

as for nsfw

I don't think they have sex with penet­ration often

like Felix has oral fixation, and Oliver just prefers doing things with his han­ds or mouth

Felix is really vo­yeuristic and huge part of their sex life is just Felix putt­ing up a show for Ol­iver and Oliver watc­hing

Felix likes to do cookwarming (oral fi­xation + it grounds him and his adhd bra­in)

Oliver is really a service dom whatever Felix wants Oliver will find a way to do it

but his personal favorite is rimming Felix until he's all wet and finish him by sucking him off and fingerings him at the same time

[marithlizard]

First impressions of Helluva Boss s2e9, "Apology Tour"

Is it weird that I feel even more reluctant to hit play this time? I knew what was waiting in Full Moon and how much it would hurt. Whatever emotional sharks are swimming in s2e9, they have bigger teeth.

Beautiful garden, is this still in the palace or is Stolas on vacation? He certainly seemed to be shutting up the palace last episode.

Annnd here comes Blitz over the wall with apology attempt #1. Prediction: It will be sincere but quickly turn into defensive anger when it's not accepted, and he will dig himself even deeper.

…oh no. He's pretending everything is normal instead

it is not, Blitz

it's really not

Maybe the way the plants are trying to eat you should be a clue

"I want to feel like I'm earning my way to earth". Well, isn't that interesting. Huh.

I've always known Blitz was proud - he's never bragged to anyone about his access to a prince of Hell, or tried to use it in any way. (Stolas would have gladly made a phone call to get Loona her appointment sooner, if nothing else.) I can certainly believe he doesn't want charity.

But that's not at all what the problem is here and you know it

The change in expression from aggressive confident seduction (Blitz do you realize you sound exactly like Chaz) to "you don't want me?"

Never play poker, hon. When you tap your claws together like that it means "oh shit I fucked up how can I make them stop being mad".

"So how about you respect that." Stolas, this man has never drunk a glass of Respect Boundary Juice in his life. He catcalls boundaries from street corners and does not call them back in the morning.

Wait. Verosika can't possibly know about the full moon breakup. She must have invited Stolas because of Ozzie's? And who else will be at this party?? Will Fizz be at this party? It'd be understandable if he still needs to vent from the years of bitter anger, but… I really hope he doesn't show.

Oh shit Barbie will be at this party.

How many relationships, romantic and otherwise, did Blitz fuck up but not care about enough to keep in his special photo gallery? Could be a lot. At least the sinners IMP has killed won't be at a human world party.

No, Stolas, Blitz doesn't really think that's the reason. He's just very very good at lying. His entire life has been a circus performance for unimpressed audiences. You're looking at a grownup version of the little boy with worm horse.

"So what are you doing here then?" YES GOOD STOLAS GET HIS ASS beautiful shot there. I feel like a sportsball commentator.

sigh I know I predicted you would dig yourself deeper, Blitz, but did you have to use a power drill?

I'm proud of Stolas for so clearly and honestly saying what he wants and doesn't want. It'd be so understandable to go straight to "Fuck off and never contact me again", but he's not doing that because he understands his own heart.

Oooh oooh OOH they're finally talking about Striker!

Shit. Blitz keeps letting his real emotions show on his face for a few seconds and then turning up the Dragon Driller X000 even more to dig himself still deeper. I got nothing this time, buddy. That "love ballads" fakeout was indefensibly nasty.

I like the angry tail-lashing with sound effects, though. This might be the angriest we've ever seen any imp be.

"I can sorry more people, everyone but you!" I was right? "Apology Tour" really is going to be Blitz going around to apologize to people he's wronged? But, uh, I did think it would be more sincere repentance and less of a fuck-you gesture.

Well. Stolas 500, Blitz 0 is the final score for THAT conversation.

Is Blitz going to go to the anti-Blitzo party in order to resentfully and insincerely apologize to the attendees? That is one of the worst ideas I've EVER heard.

Oh no he's got a list! YES APOLOGIZE TO MOXXIE

MARTHA! Blitz is actually putting the people he killed on this list?? Like, he recognizes that it was wrong in some way? huh.

a gift basket

a "sorry we killed you" gift basket

my mind is leaping straight past the absurdity into the math how many gift baskets can you afford Blitz oh no wait, he probably just stole a whole shop of them from the human world.

In which case take it Martha, when will you ever get to eat Earth food again?

wait

I take it all back, Mrs. Mayberry and Martha shacking up is the funniest thing I've seen all year. Everyone's mood is improved all round, good job Blitz.

But that list ought to be nineteen pages long at minimum, you just wrote down a dozen easy ones because this is a performative gesture to make yourself feel better

And the DHORK agents get a little card with a horsey! Guess they didn't rate a gift basket. (I like how distinctly different the new Asmodean crystal portals are, and how easy it seems to be for Blitzo to use them. Guess it is an upgrade after all.)

Jesse the hot bouncer? That IS low-hanging fruit, you probably weren't even the rudest person he dealt with that night.

What on earth are these "funny" texts you've been sending Stolas? Not exactly A-list material wait are you actually typing out a genuine apology?

Nope, not sending it. Not ready yet.

Loo Loo Land's still in ruins. I thought we saw them rebuilding it in "Exes and Ohs", but maybe Mammon changed his mind.

Can't deal with Moxxie, there must be someone really easy to apologize to - I know, corpses!

pfft I would've liked to see him give a little speech at the Hollys.

Yeah, the cherubs deserved that. And now we've run out of excuses to avoid the party.

That's the first time we've ever seen anyone comment on Blitz's scars. I'm just glad he didn't kill them.

Quite a well-attended party, I can see making that decor was very cathartic for you Verosika. Stolas out of place and unhappy - I wonder what he expected? Lovely costume, though, I like that much better than the royal romper.

Verosika looks different when out of her glamorous work getups, doesn't she? More like a relatable person.

Hey, there's a sack of some sort of party supplies from Bee! I guess she and Vortex have no reason to care about Loona's "dad guy" more than in passing.

(You know, for an animation helmed by someone who gets constantly attacked for being fatphobic and never drawing body diversity, I see a far number of hot larger bodies in this episode. Just saying.)

"Sorry for fucking your mom, though I thought it was your dad" - Standup comedians wish they could think up lines as awful as what Blitzo throws off the cuff.

I really thought a lot of the images from the trailer must be hallucinations or dream sequences. But no, Blitz just finally realized that he is in a room full of people who would love to kill him slowly as a party game, and took cover. It's amazing he made it across the room without being recognized.

BWHAHAHA IT'S DENNIS. Who I really should feel bad for. He didn't do anything.

Wow, that is - not a musical style I expected from Stolas. But Blitz needs to hear this and lord knows Stolas needs to sing his heart out to a sympathetic audience for once.

I got too caught up to remember to comment for a bit, but they are talking! I didn't think they would get this far!

Look at those fingers- that's not the "how can I get out of trouble" tell, that's - I don't know what, something more honest. Blitz cares, it's obvious he does, he doesn't want Stolas to be hurting like this and yet he can't make himself say the words Stolas says he wants to hear.

And - that's a good thing? This isn't a romcom, if he said those things right now neither of them would really be able to believe it. And despite his jealousy, Blitz doesn't try to stop Stolas from going off to dance with someone else. He lets him go, he doesn't make a scene, and now I think he's going to go apologize to Verosika. For real, even.

Good job, Blitz. First really right move you've made all episode.

Verosika overheard their conversation, at least enough to know about the apology tour?

sigh Well, I guess he always does have have to try his circus act first. It's so much safer than sincerity.

Oof. That's why he bailed? That's all? Nothing about him wanting kids, or her drinking, or sexual incompatibility. Just him being afraid of commitment. And he couldn't even just dump her, judging by her song at Ozzie's; it must have been a drawn-out thing of him becoming less responsive over time and then running away with her wallet.

At least some self-reflection is happening. And jealousy! While I'm very glad that Verosika stopped him, I'm also glad to know that Blitz thinks of Stolas as his bird.

She served him the piece with his own heart on it. 9000 points for style, Verosika. I hope you find the right demon for you.

I think Wally is just there to sell merch and not because he also feels personally victimized.

HAH her song haunting him on the radio is perfect.

Stolas's dance partner is in the credits as ""Better than Blitzo" Guy" pfft. (at least I assume that's him)

Conclusion: 10/10, ending on a more hopeful note than I expected. I'm so glad they didn't do a B plot this time; it would've been really jarring, and the silly apologies sequence gave us enough of a breather between the heavy scenes.

[pens-in-a-jam-jar]

Hi- sorry, was forced to use my main bc for some reason Tumblr doesn't let me ask with my side account for rwd-

Who's who in your Utena au?

*fLAILING!!!* (also yea I think that's like. An intentional thing Tumblr does, not entirely sure why.)

Okay so we of course know Dani = Utena, VR-LA = Anthy. Starting with my strongest choices then going on in no particular order:

Roy is our Wakaba. He has to be. Roy fucking tackling Dani nearly sending both of them tumbling into the courtyard?? Dani initially joining in on the duels over his honor not knowing what the fuck she's truly getting herself into??? Roy being jealous over how much time she spends with VR-LA now???? The Black Rose Arc??????? It's so good It's So Good!!!

For my next strongest choice: MR-SN as Dios. Obviously. If I'm fucking with the theming to be less about gender roles and more about class/caste roles (as is the case when I've changed the 'because you're a girl' line into 'because you are nothing') then of course MR-SN needs to be the image of The Perfect Self-Made Captain In Charge.

However: the situation with Dios vs Akio is weird. Because everyone from Akio and Dios themselves to the visual language the show uses present the two of them as two completely separate people, and Anthy and her brother are clearly not mortal humans. Anthy has been suffering constantly for long enough that the event that started this and the folk tale version of the event passed down culturally bear next to no resemblance to one another. So we could frame it as Dios and Akio being different aspects of the same conceptual being. Dios died in the same way Pan greek god of the wild died. He's dead because people say he is, but he can never be gone forever. In Dios's case, he has been replaced by a version of himself that 'grew up' and 'lost his nobility'. He's still Anthy's older brother, but he is not Dios.

We're gonna make the call that they're to be represented by different characters and have DX-TR be Akio, mainly for his connection to VR-LA and the fact that he canonically killed Dani once.

Emi is Chu-Chu. Enough said. No notes.

I'm choosing a Nanami next because she's my favorite. Davion is our Nanami. Because think about it: Nanami is introduced lashing out at Anthy because Anthy is valued and coveted by the world and has the attention and (as far as Nanami can tell) affection of her older brother who Nanami sees as her whole world. It's infuriatingly unfair to her that Anthy would be (from Nanami's point of view) constantly rewarded with adoration and protection for what Nanami intuitively clocks as an act. Even if it's a 'there's no way, she's too good to be true' kind of impulse, she is right! Anthy performs this perfect feminine damsel image that everyone defines her by, and Nanami cannot fucking stand that seemingly everyone values Anthy over Nanami for ~performing well~. Anthy gets everything just for being fake and that's just not fair! What kind of vampiric freak does that on purpose??

If we are changing the themes to be about class roles and meritocracy instead of gender roles, of course Davion would make an excellent Nanami, because VR-LA himself says 'Competence is not a good look on you, Davion' in canon and he just fuckin' takes it. But what if he had reason to Fucking Hate VR-LA For It? Think of the drama: Davion calling VR-LA captain as a dig because they both know that's not his real station and VR-LA smiling back at him in that unsettling way Anthy smiles at Nanami. Davion realizing Dani is special for some ephemeral reason he doesn't understand despite knowing for a fact she's lower on the totem pole that him and VR-LA, and he shouldn't be bothered by the things she says and does But He Is! Davion being constantly suspicious of both of them yet constantly hovering around them trying to understand.

Another fun casting: Cassimere as Sayoji. Top notch I'd say. Do I even need to explain this one? The exchange diary scenes alone would be fucking hysterical, and the scene of Anthy fully dropping the way she used to speak to Sayonji but with VR-LA and Cassimere? Perfection.

If Cassimere is Sayonji, I would then posit K-LB as Touga and I know that's horribly cursed and their personalities aren't even a little similar, but like think about it: K-LB and Dani interacting with the leadership and ownership they're aiming for in wildly different ways the same way Touga and Utena interact with the idea of masculinity and princeliness in ways that cause them to clash yet that they both almost understand one another over. K-LB being close to DX-TR because DX-TR has promised him the way to view 'something eternal'. K-LB winning VR-LA and chatting with him all chipper-like asking him some of the same questions he's seen Dani ask him and getting different answers. K-LB trying one last time to make some kind of executive decision over Dani and VR-LA at the end, begging them not to listen to End of the World and Dani Just Not Trusting Him. I love it. Tastey drama.

I'm making Elyse, Love and Finbar my Shiori, Ruka, and Juri respectively. This feels really mean to Specifically Elyse but also the three of them would be So Fucking Good for this??? I promise, I promise it's a good idea. I'm so sorry Elyse.

Kyana and Ione as Miki and Kozue? The fuckin' Tastey Drama??? Codependency my (fictional) beloved!! The duels with Miki and Utena, but with Kyana and Dani CAN YOU IMAGINE?

Oh god. I Completely On Accident made it so the badminton scene would be happening between the 3 non-VR-LA members of the og crew absjdhskzbazoxbxg

[apple-pecan]

Silhouette Mirage (1997)

SPOILERS FOR A GAME TWO PEOPLE ON THE ENTIRE PLANET HAVE PLAYED

treasure is one of those strange developers that you don't typically see anymore except for indie circles. they hated marketability and rehashing the same game ideas and IPs over and over again, and when they made a game, they would always strive to make something brand new. this is particularly evident in the japan exclusive sega saturn game silhouette mirage, made by the same internal development team that made the really strange but cool platformer dynamite headdy 3 years prior. and if you thought dynamite heady was strange, then boy howdy…

this game is pretty niche in the catalog of the already niche developer; it has not been rereleased in any form besides a japan exclusive PSN release in 2010. this is a game that strives for originality above all else, almost to it's detriment. as simply put as possible, this is a 2d platformer/run-and-gun... thing. the main gimmick of this game is that there are two types of enemies, silhouettes (blue) and mirages (red). the main character, shyna, has an ambidextrous sprite and can switch between both these elements depending on which way she is facing. if you shoot an enemy of the opposite color, say facing right so that your sprite is red and then shooting a blue enemy, they will take damage and after enough hits, die. but if you shoot an enemy of the same color, it simply drains their spirit (think MP). if they dont have any spirit, they cant perform any special attacks.

there are 7 different weapons, called parasites, named after each of the deadly sins. i tended to use gluttony the most, as it shoots a giant laser for as long as you hold the button (the other weapons tend to be button mashy). but here's the catch; if an enemy drains YOU of all your spirit, it will kill your parasite and you wont be able to use it anymore. how do you get more parasites? a bunny sells them to you for cash. how do you get cash? you go up to an enemy and bash their fucking brains in with your fist, making them drop gold. you can even do this to bosses. there's like 40 different moves in the game like this and rather than being demonstrated to you organically, they are explained only once during a boring tutorial at the beginning of the game. by the time it was over i had already forgotten most of them as some are so situational they're not even worth using.

oh yeah, by the end of the game, there are some enemies and bosses that are neither silhouette OR mirage! you try to shoot them but all your attacks bounce right off. to handle these fucking assholes, you must wait for them to sporadically shoot a projectile at you and use your reflector to slowly chip away at their health over the course of 5 minutes. this is as obnoxious as it sounds.

if the whole two elements thing sounds like ikaruga, well, it is. silhouette mirage was the origin of the polarity switch system in that game, but i feel like it's handled better in ikaruga. i would've much rather had a button press to switch elements im weak/resistant to rather than it having it depend on which direction i'm facing. you CAN press a button to change which side of shyna is red or blue, but the animation for it takes so long and it drains so much of your valuable spirit meter that it's never worth it. oh yeah did i mention your parasite gets weaker the less spirit you have? and in the fucking awful playstation localization by working designs, your spirit meter counts as AMMO!?!?!?!?!?!!!?? just play the saturn version; it's even fan translated now.

okay, so the gameplay is kind of a mess, but how's the everything else like the aesthetics? in a word: very fucking good. the art style is immediately pleasing to the eye with some really nice pixel art, some fun enemy designs, as well as a cute and very likable main character. the music is incredible: it's the same composers as dynamite headdy and guardian heroes, so from that pedigree alone you're guaranteed tons of bangers. the levels you traverse also look really cool, from a nighttime city to a european castle and even a fucked up game show.

the story, as crazy as it is, ultimately goes into very dark and uncomfortable territory, much like a kirby game, and only got more and more interesting as i played. i particularly liked the endings; there are several and rather than just the typical "good ending" or "bad ending", they're both very subjective and what outcome that would be more preferable will depend on the person playing the game. as non-spoilerly as possible: would you rather restore the ruined earth to it's former state but be forgotten by history, or keep it as is and be celebrated and beloved for all of time by the few people that still remain on the planet? holy shit, is this a shin megami tensei game in disguise or what?! the ending to the game has been stuck in my head ever since i beat it, and truthfully, it made the very annoying climax of the game all worth it.

should you play this game? uh, maybe! are you a fan of treasure, namely of ikaruga and/or dynamite headdy? do you like weird, wacky, ultra unconventional games? do you like cutesy games with hidden dark sides? are you jonesin' for more import games to play on the sega saturn? if you answered yes to any of these questions, piraI MEAN LEGALLY OBTAIN THIS GAME anyway you can. don't bother with the american playstation port, as mentioned earlier working designs fucked with it's mechanics making it a chore to play and filled the script with outdated 90's references while simultaneously censoring the dicier content to get that sweet succulent E for everyone rating. it's not perfect, and it's not even the best treasure game on the saturn, but it's guaranteed to be a game unlike anything you've ever played.

7/10

NOTE: working designs gave one of the bosses an arnold schwarzenegger impression voice. seriously. just play the saturn version.

[lucisz39]

Eurovision Semi 2

I was at work through the Semi so here are some very late notes.

01- Denmark: Reiley — “Breaking My Heart”. I swear you're a better Eurovision country than this. The song is catchy I'll give it that. Reiley had shaky vocals and sang exclusively to the camera the entire time. There are tik tok personalities like Sam Rider and then there are ones like Reiley. One has some stage presence the other only can make it work staring straight into a camera. I'm not sorry he didn't make it.

Sidenote- Daði Freyr? Love that for us

02- Armenia: Brunette — “Future Lover”. Not one I was feeling but shes talented. After Reiley I'm glad she didn't keep direct eye contact with the camera the entire time. Happy she escaped the placement of death unscathed though. Good for her.

03- Romania: Theodor Andrei — “D. G. T. (Off and on)”. The first song of the night I had downloaded. In the same category as Portugal for me. On Stage the artist is a sledgehammer of charisma. Some of the solo promo performances were much better than the national final. He's a great singer but he needed to rework the staging not the song itself. I love this one but I'm not surprised it didn't make it

04- Estonia: Alika — “Bridges”. It's a very pretty song. Exactly the kind of song that would qualify. I love her costuming but other wise forgettable. 

05- Belgium: Gustaph — “Because of You”. Another song I downloaded but it's not one I listened to a ton. I was worried how this one would go down live. But it a lot of fun! I had a big smile the whole time. The backup singers were absolutely killing it. That's saying nothing of the dancer! Simple effective staging.

06-Cyprus: Andrew Lambrou — “Break A Broken Heart”- Yeah I didn't remember this one. It's catchy and I'm feeling it. I really like the staging with the water effect and the fog. The performer is Barefoot which always a good start (think it worked in his favor). Is it me or does it sound like Believer by Imagine Dragons? And with that I think I just talked myself out of liking it.

07- Iceland: Diljá — “Power”. I normally love Iceland in Eurovision.  I'm surprised this one didn't grow on me. She's a talented performer and is giving it everything she's got. But not a song for me.  I am little sad she didn't qualify. I want to see Iceland win one year and I hope we didn't lose our best chance in 2020 with "Think About Things"

08-Greece: Victor Vernicos — “What They Say”.  Oh my god he looks like a baby. Repeat after me "not a song for me" (I'll say that a lot) but I liked this one. Hes got good energy. That being said, I really do root for the young ones swinging for the fences. I was rooting for the kid but understand why he didn't make it. I hope he keeps going with music and possibly Eurovision.

09-Poland: Blanka — “Solo”. Why the fuck is this here. Look at least she sounds like she's improved. That being said, hope she comes in last. NGL I skipped ahead when we hit the dance break.

10-Slovenia: Joker Out — “Carpe Diem”. Ok this is my favorite song of the year. Was a bit scared they were going to change the language to English when they released that version. Happy to see that wasn't the case. This performance was so much fun. Gonna be devastated if these guys don't make top 10. I knew they made it before I watched the replay but even still I was so stressed till they were announced. I was watching the Finnish broadcast and their hosts also sounded EXTREMELY stressed about them not getting called right away.

11-Georgia: Iru — “Echo”. Not even going to lie. I'm conflicted about this one. I love the way it sounds huge and bombastic. Iru can certainly sing. Love the staging but wish some of the dancers from the music video came in. At the same time the lyrics lean closer to worship music than a self-love song to me. It makes my skin crawl and I don't like it.

12- San Marino: Piqued Jacks — “Like An Animal”. I'm almost embarrassed about how much I like this one. I listen to a lot of alt rock and indie rock. I was primed to like it. This is another of my favorites and was on heavy rotation on my drives home. It's fun and catchy. It both makes me smile and want to dance. But I mean it’s a fine song. The performance at the national final was way stronger than the semi. It took the front man a good 2 minutes to get it together and start selling his performance. In a different year, if the stars aligned it could have made it to the final and it would have been in the bottom. I'm not surprised it didn't make it, but I am a little sad. Come on guys it wasn't a ballad! That's gotta count for something.

13-Austria: Teya & Salena — “Who The Hell Is Edgar?”. I said it before and I'll say it again. These guys had me nervous. Love the song it's been on heavy rotation. But I only saw one live performance before this and it was a fairly shaky one. Not tonight though. All cylinders were firing. My only note is I'm sad they didn't use the old guys in suits from the music video as the dancers. Also, please note, I am in love and so very fucking queer.

14- Albania: Albina and Familja Kelmendi — “Duje”. Again a "not my thing" song;. Nothing but respect for it though. A very heartfelt song and real family affair. But! Whoever compared them to the Addams family, I'm never going to not think of that now.

15- Lithuania: Monika Linkyte — “Stay”. Ok you might be expecting me to say this is another "not my thing" song... But I really really love this one. There are like 2 ballads that got me this year. This is one of them. The  “ciūto tūto” hook is living in my head rent free. She's got a lovely voice and the emotion she puts into the song really sells it. It's a very heartfelt song and it makes me want to wrap her up in a hug.

16- Australia: Voyager — “Promise”. Ok remember what I said for Piqued Jacks. How I mostly listen to alt rock... Yeah I don't love this one. I'll take it over (most) most of the ballads but it's my least favorite out of all the rock leaning ones. It did get a download though! I will say out of everyone in this contest I felt like Voyager wants to be here the most. Australia wants to be in Eurovision. I would rather watch people who want to be here than people feeling eh about it. Please keep inviting Australia. I was going to be genuinely upset if they didn't make it to the final.

Bonus!

- The Drag Queens. Ok I agree with the consensus. How do I vote for them?

Side note: All the Big 5 (6) were downloaded.

-Spain. No words. I love this whole thing. It's dramatic and so very different from last years. I only wish they took more notes from the music video for the staging.

-Ukraine. Her name is Fashion. Not the staging I expected. I quite like it though. There is something very classy about this one as well.  

-UK. Ok first off. Who dressed this girl in Shein? The song? It's a girly bop and a good time. She's not the best singer but well I don't think the UK wanted her to be. Look they have had a coronation and Eurovsion in the same month. Let them have this.

Look Semi-1 was an all out brawl for spots. This one was the Snooze fest. Yet somehow this is the semi of disappointments for me. See y’all Saturday for the final. How much time do you think it’s gonna run over this year?

[gogtopia]

hi Jules I just finished reading ur dnf baseball fic and it was really really epic and fun and emotional I enjoyed it a lot I’ve grown up surrounded by baseball and going to mlb games but have never been interested at all either watching or playing like it just wasn’t smth I could get into but ur fic fr just helped a lot w understanding the fundamentals and potential passion and stuff that goes into the sport which I think is really cool I’ve reads lots of sports aus in diff fandoms but this was the first baseball au and I liked it a lot also I lovedddd gnfs characterization ough I need to hug him ok sorry for the random paragraph I loved ur fic a lot ok that’s all love u goodnight :3

ACE THANK YOU SO MUCH <3<3<3 it's a fic that really meant a lot to me to write so i'm glad it could be somewhat meaningful to you too. and the gnf comment specifically means a lot to me bc i loveee how i wrote him in this au specifically

i had a few other plans for that universe that have kinda been derailed by cc drama or whatever including a sapnap centric fic that i started writing already LOL idk if i'll resurrect this project in some capacity and change things around but here's the first scene of that fic since i like it a lot and george is fun in it

Sapnap is quite literally living the dream. If the 11-year-old version of himself could see him now, just ten years later, his jaw would drop to the floor in amazement. Who would’ve thought that the short nerdy kid who they shoved behind the plate because nobody else wanted to don all the equipment every inning would be here now— the starting catcher for a Major League Baseball team?

He hopes all the kids that used to shit on him when he was younger are eating their words every time they turn on ESPN. Realistically, they’re probably just using the fact that they went to school together as a fun fact during company icebreakers, having forgotten about their years in school together entirely.

It’s been three years since he was crowned Rookie of the Year in a hectic season that changed his fucking life but most of the time, he still feels like he’s on top of the world. Last season was probably his best so far and he feels pretty good about this season, even if it’s nearly June and his batting average is barely breaking .260. He can do better and he’s going to. If he really applies himself, he can still break .300.

And, as much as Dream claims he has the yips, he doesn’t. There’s no reason for him to be having any sort of performance anxiety, not when everything has been going so well. He gets to play with his best friends in the fucking world, including George who is like his baseball soulmate and there are little kids in the audience wearing jerseys with his name on the back that genuinely look up to him as an openly bisexual athlete in the MLB.

He plays for them, really. As much as Sapnap loves the game, he also likes that it gives him a chance to be a role model for kids that might feel alone as he did, especially for the queer kids that need to know they have as much of a place in professional sports as everyone else.

In the years since Sapnap and his friends have been out, plenty of other players across the league as well as in other sports have followed in their footsteps. They’ve made a difference, solely by being themselves. It’s kinda epic, as George might say.

Except, of course, when it isn’t.

They’re playing the Yankees because of course it’s the fucking Yankees, which means that the ballpark is fucking packed. They always pull a bigger crowd when they play New York. Something about big cities being connected or something like that.

Even though the Yankees are damn good this year, they’re up 3-0. It’s not a surprise really. Not when George is on the mound, their top starter by far now that he’s really hit his stride in the league. Even if he’s already pitched four innings, he doesn’t seem all that tired and he’s still throwing strikes, so it seems like he’ll have a few more with him.

It’s one of the Yankees outfielders that says it, some tall guy that hits good enough to validate his fucking ego, and he whispers it under his breath, just loud enough for Sapnap to hear.

“Surprised his hand hasn’t given out yet,” he mutters. “Gotta be tired from stroking Dream’s tiny dick all night.”

For a moment, Sapnap glances back to the umpire, who had surely heard what he said since it’s pretty packed around the plate. The ump looks at him with a frown, as if he’s disrespecting his time with the mere act of glancing back over such fucking brazen unsportsmanlike conduct.

Fuck that. Sapnap motions for a time-out and steps back from behind the plate, running toward the mound.

Dream shoots him a questioning look from third base and he waves him off. He can feel his coach glaring at his back, probably confused as to why he’s calling a time-out while George is still on top of his game.

George furrows his eyebrows when he got there, shoving the ball into his glove. “What’s the issue? I thought I was pitching well. One single this inning isn’t enough to take me off the mound.”

“It’s not that,” he tells him, glancing back at the batter for a moment. The asshole is fucking smirking from his place on the plate. “Fuckface over there said something douchey.”

He snorts and lifts his cap for a moment, running his hand through his short hair, which has gone a little curly with sweat. “You don’t need to tattle on annoying batters to me, Sapnap. What am I meant to do about it? I’ll try my best to strike him out, just as I always do.”

“He said your hand must be tired from stroking Dream’s dick all night.”

George’s jaw tenses and his free hand balls up into a fist. It’s definitely not the first time that he’s heard this sort of thing— not even the first time that it’s happened in a game— but usually, it comes from leering fans rather than players who have reputations at stake. “He said that?”

Sapnap nods. “Yeah. And I believe he called it tiny.”

“Well, he’s simply incorrect about that part. I’d bet $100 that Dream is more gifted than him down there, so to speak,” George says with a cursory glance at the guy, making Sapnap wrinkle his nose. He wants to get George pissed off so he’s more motivated to strike this asshole out, not hear about his other best friend’s dick size.

“Just strike him out for me,” Sapnap says, patting him on the back. “And for Dream.”

“Sure.”

George purses his lips and something unreadable crosses his eyes. Sapnap hopes that he didn’t accidentally make him nervous rather than motivated. Confidence is an essential part of George’s success as a pitcher. He doesn’t choke very often but it’s almost always because he gets stuck in his own head.

Sapnap runs back behind the plate and crouches down into that familiar stance, signaling the next pitch to George. A curveball.

Except, George doesn’t pitch a curveball. With fire in his eyes, he sends the ball hurtling directly toward the batter and, when he tries to jump out of the way and dodge it, it slams straight into his back, making him scream out in pain.

“Oops!” George calls out, loud enough for anyone in the infield to hear. “I suppose my hand just got tired or something.”

A medic and the Yankees coach start running onto the field to check on the batter, but he ignores them, stalking toward the mound instead and drawing his hand back. The batter, in his full muscular 6’2” glory, punches George squarely in the face before he has a chance to duck out of the way. George stumbles back and nearly falls to the ground, barely sticking out a hand to catch himself in time as blood drips from his nose, small droplets of crimson littering the dirt on the mound.

“George!” Dream shouts, running toward him from third base. George jumps back up and punches the other player in the jaw before he can reach him. George is generally a pacifist, despite being a shit-stirrer with his friends,  and it takes a lot to piss him off. The fact he threw that pitch in the first place is shocking. But physically fighting somebody? Sapnap has never seen him like this in their three years of friendship.

The runner on first starts to get into a screaming match with Punz and suddenly, Yankees come piling off the bench with gritted teeth and wild eyes, rearing for a fight.

The guy on deck comes for Sapnap and, even though he has a few inches on him in terms of height, Sapnap is the stockier guy. He throws his helmet on the ground so he can see better and tackles the guy to the ground, throwing a punch at him that barely hits the dirt instead of his face.

The Yankees player uses the momentum from the punch to flip them around so he’s on top of him, straddling his waist in a way he might find erotic if it wasn’t some ugly second baseman that sprays a little spit out of his mouth every time he yells, and he throws a punch of his own, which Sapnap is barely able to block with his arm before thrusting his knee up into his gut. He hopes the plastic from his leg guards make it hurt just a little bit more. Now that he’s been roped into an actual fight, his catcher’s gear feels a little bit like armor.

The player winces and falls backward, allowing Sapnap to stagger to his feet. He looks out to the field for a moment to see if they’re winning this brawl.

It’s a fucking frenzy. Half of the players on both teams are throwing punches at somebody and pretty much everyone else is screaming and swearing. Dream is desperately trying to pull George away from his particularly nasty rumble while another Yankees player tries to pick a fight with him at the same time, only to be absently swatted away. There are definitely no winners here right now: just blood and obscenities being hurled all over the place.

Sapnap turns back toward the guy he was fighting just quick enough to see the first hurtling toward his face. He isn’t able to stop it this time and the hit sends a burst of pain flashing through his face as he falls back onto the ground with a puff of dirt rising up around him.

A sickening smile spread’s across the guy’s face and he’s about to reach down to hit him again when the umpire started wildly blowing his whistle and pulls the guy off by the back of his shirt.

Once the rumble simmers down to a mixture of shame and dirty looks, the umpire points toward George and motions for him to get off of the field even though the batter was the one to throw the first punch. The stadium boos him loudly. It isn’t fair that George is getting booted from the game but the guy who threw the first punch still gets to jog over to first.

George is covered in dirt from head to toe as blood drips from his nose and seeps into his black jersey, invisible save for the few droplets that hit the 17 stitched onto his chest. Even though he should be pissed off, he snatches his hat off the ground with a wild grin. George turns toward where he knows a camera is fixed on him and winks, blowing it a kiss as he struts confidently off the field.

What the fuck? Dream mouths to Sapnap as he marches back to third base.

Sapnap waves him off. George’ll explain it to him as soon as he gets back to the dugout anyway, even if that might be a while, judging by the mediocre pitcher that’s being tasked with relieving him.

[tautozhone]

i want more people to know about the Permanent Fund Dividend in Alaska actually. more US citizens specifically need to know our country has implemented UBI systems already (because of oil and businesses bullshit, but still. tldr is that citizens of alaska wanted compensation for everything that would not be there as resource for future generations). it has been going for decades strong. their website is uploading progress and performance reports constantly too. it’s just not talked about, at least not as far as i’m aware about, and the modern usamerican seems to think any sort of social system would be a sin despite the multiple ones we have on national or state levels. the UBI plan in alaska was another nail in the coffin of realizing our system is actively working against us.

on to the ranting

the alaskan people for better or worse modified the state constitution to have a cut of the profit coming off the land. i learned from this that people can organize and fight and put their votes toward meaningful change, but how the rhetoric around it matters. it was to save hope for future generations, i’d like to imagine thats why it went over well. today i feel like so much rhetoric has developed around “handouts” and UBI being bad because ooo scary taxes raising. we just don’t even recognize what has already been helping and what needs to become a more common practice.

imagine if every state with farm land for any big corporation was allowed to have 25% of the profit distributed across the entire population. not just those who work the land, but the people who complete the chain in cycles of production. factory workers. truck drivers. mechanics. the average parent who needs to raise a child and have enough to survive.

are there downsides? yes. people have to register, have to have residency, have to be a citizen, and be of adult age. it’s an opt in system, so they’re technically asking you for your information, but i can barely imagine an automated version of all this that wouldn’t still rely on documentation and ID somehow. the point is that it’s already been done, it’s been happening for longer than we tend to think, and it’s been working as far as i’m aware.

by all means the state of alaska is not in the best shape economically. they rely on gas and oil, and next to other mined resources their main profit is seafood. a form of agriculture. one that they continue to depend on even more as unrenewable resources are stripped away. i don’t like the fucking oil industry as much as the next guy but this is the exact “shave off profits of the rich to support the people” thing that i’ve seen everyone hoping and fighting for.

the future is not as far away as it feels, but it’s not close either. this won’t happen tomorrow. more and more people need to learn why UBI is important and even more importantly how we can learn from what’s happened in alaska and refine it to be less industry specific.

i didn’t even check reblogs to see if anyone had said this already, say it again! say it 500 times!

THE USA ALREADY DOES UBI FOR ONE STATE. IT CAN DO MORE.

there have been 774664 studies on basic income and the results of every single one have been “wow! we gave people money and literally everything improved! crime rates are down! the actual sky is bluer! my (the researcher’s) wife decided not to leave me after all!” but these have all been short studies, just a couple years. i think what’s really missing from the field is a proper long form study, with a broader, bolder demographic, to really get us those numbers we need. a truly diverse study pool like, say, everyone. forever

[gaykarstaagforever]

Fans of my Tumblr will remember when I did this post about Stawberry Hill House, a quaint gothic folly of an 18th century mansion, built by some Georgian turbo-nerd.

I didn't in that post do any discussion about what "gothic" actually means, because it is complicated and confusing and is applied to different things differently, depending on who is doing it. Suffice it to say now, it was an artistic trend of the second half of the 18th century, based on the First Industrial Revolution and the so-called The Age of Reason, where people counterintuitively got real into liking ancient ruins and dark medieval stuff and spooky things.

Before then, things were good or bad because the church or king said so; after we figured out the steam engine and medicine, we realized that demons weren't in fact responsible for 80% of everything, so being scared of them in principle was kind of a waste. Being scared of or liking ANYTHING in principle was goofy. Instead of everything being objectively a way, things are now subjectively a way, and how we feel and react to them gives them their REAL value.

Yeah it just goes on like this. Entire books of this shit. Secularism and capitalism (as a philosophy) come out of this. It ties in to why America's Founding Fathers suddenly felt like they could say "fuck the king for being jerk," while Thomas Jefferson sat there crossing out all the stuff about miracles in the Bible and giggling.

But it ALSO meant that if you wanted to be into ghosts or the histories of banned religions, or do drugs and think your drug-dreams mattered, go for it, landed gentry! Weird things are fun and exciting, instead of risking your immortal soul! What if there are beasts? What if WE are the beasts?!

Yes, this is where the idea of modern horror has its earliest pop-cultural roots. In 1764, Horace Walpole - the guy who built Strawberry Hill - wrote The Castle of Otranto, which he styled "a Gothic Novel." It was partially based on a scary dream he had while at Strawberry Hill, involving random giant pieces of medieval armor being in his bedroom. ...Which is one of those things that doesn't sound scary, but you damn well know it totally would be if you had a nightmare about it while sleeping in your whimsical fairy house.

The Castle of Otranto was an immediate hit. With the first edition, Walpole published it under a pseudonym and claimed it was an English translation of a Renaissance Italian work. In subsequent editions he dropped the pretense and admitted he just wrote it, which didn't hurt sales but pissed off all the literary critics who had been tricked. ...Which is funny, so good on him. But they immediately changed their reviews of it to "awesome" to "this totally sucks and is stupid."

Which either means they were unprofessionally pissy, or they had been generous initially, and now knowing it wasn't a translation, were eager to admit that, other than the fun crazy stuff, it isn't very good.

Yes, even for 1764. Walpole is intentionally going for an arch, dated, Shakespearean style, to fit his made up date (the 16th century) for the original Italian. And, man - it sounds like what happens when someone does that.

Shakespeare was writing in iambic pentameter. It was performance poetry, so it sounded like that to fit the rhythm and be compelling on stage. Minus those two demands, everyone who apes the style just uses big weird words for everything, and everyone talks too much about nothing in an attempt to have speeches or be funny, and the goddamn thees and thous...!

The Castle of Otranto gets worse as it goes along. I'm a third of the way through this 4 hour audiobook version, and every single scene is someone important and the help taking 10 minutes to discuss a thing we all just saw happen. It's like if the guy writing the King James Bible was getting paid by the word.

Modern critics and book fans almost universally agree it is "virtually unreadable." I wouldn't go that far. It is generally coherent and does characters well. But there is no hint of any kind of pacing, and the plot is one inexplicable thing happening to obviously disturbed people after another, with extended breaks for them to Hamlet Whine about it.

The story literally starts with a giant Renaissance armor helmet falling from the sky and exploding a man on his wedding day. Which sounds fun and fascinating. But neither the author or the story are seemingly interested in that as anything other than an ominous trope that triggers a bad, confusing soap opera.

At least so far. There are six chapters and I'm only into the second one, and it is a rough listen. More weird things happen, but so far it could just be one family and their comedy servants going mad, and all of the dozen characters are starting to run together, and people seem to keep teleporting around, and about half of the action takes place between scenes, and someone has to explain what happened to someone else.

I guess as a gothic novel plot, "spooky weird soap opera about crazy people in a gross house" is par for the course. But this first attempt at that has a few flaws.

Check it out (pretty sure a real person is reading this, due to audio issues and funny pronounciation / accent choices. It's fine). Free pdfs are easily available too, though I hear the formatting is especially weird and makes it harder to read. I haven't looked.

Trigger warnings: gore, attempted SA, the kind of confusing misogyny only the 18th century could produce.

And that's just the first hour!

Also ESOTERICA did a video about the book and the Gothic aesthetic in general a month ago, which is what inspired me to try the book. He goes into detail about the philosophical side of gothicism, if you are interested in trying to keep up with that.

[voidsumbrella]

re: [this post]:

so i wuv to get into rapid healing/immortality as body horror and try to invoke it whenever im in a setting where it's possible, which as of yet has been exactly… twice… but thats fine.

but: witch! i have nnnno idea if ive ever gone into this here, but their whole deal is that they're running god software on human hardware; they have the ability to manipulate reality to conform to their exact expectations and obey their every command, but at the expense of the energy it would take to do so, and thanks to having a squishy (mostly) human body, they only have a limited amount of energy to work with at any one time. this energy can be stockpiled, and even hitting complete zero won't kill them in the sense of erasing their soul, but burning through all of it too fast without adequate preparation can and will cause their flesh to cease being able to sustain itself and they'll keel over dead until they recharge. the amount of power they have and the speed at which is regenerates is proportional to the amount of faith people have in them and their abilities (it is god magic, after all!), and as such they're constantly trying to help as many people as they can. they're a professional wish granter.

there's a whole list of rules and caveats as to how this whole thing works in practice and a longer list for why it works like that, which ill spare you from reading (and myself from having to write coherently off the top of my head), but the short version is that they take payment from those who ask for their wishes granted so as to offset the energy cost from themself, and they're always juggling ways to reduce that cost so they don't fuck themself or their client over. so! if they're requested to heal someone's injuries their list of options that might be something like:

speed up the body's natural healing process: the energy drain split is between them (for allowing rapidity) and the patient (actually healing the injury); only works if the injury is nonlethal and comparatively minor, like a bad cut or a broken bone; the patient would probably be fatigued for a while, but wouldn't be in pain.

give the body the energy to heal itself, even if it would not be able to do so on its own: can work on whatever, but places the energy cost entirely on them; fine for minor injuries, but for something lethal they'd either have to work at the pace their energy is refilling, or pour everything they have at once to get the person stable knowing their heart will stop partway through, and finish patching them up in a second session once they've woken up.

prevent the injury from happening via a localized time distortion: this is almost never on the table, as changing any timeline in any way is insanely difficult 99.999999999% of the time.

reset the body to its original condition: this requires them to have knowledge of the body in its original condition of the body is, or be willing to gamble that someone else's "blueprint" would work well enough. incredibly circumstantial as to if its possible at all, highly variable energy cost.

get the person medical aid that they would not otherwise be able to access: they keep a comprehensive first aid kit and a variety of healing potions across a spectrum of magic systems on them at all times, as well as a pile of shortcuts to different medical institutions. this is what they go with whenever possible: the energy cost is very low, if not free, and they're not interested in making people trade everything they have to avoid dying from preventable causes. insert united states medical system joke here.

their options are a little more limited if they have to perform first aid on someone without making a contract with them. snapping their fingers and willing it to be fixed hands-off will pick a random vaguely plausible method with an unpredictable cost that will be entirely on them; their magic is incompatible with 99.9% of other universes so just manually pouring energy into them will be slow, inefficient, and runs the risk of poisoning the person before healing them. their body can barely handle being flooded with raw god energy, and they've been adjusting to it for 500+ years.

at least regenerating their own body is easy enough.

[the-rollerchloster]

The number of barn scene gifs and mentions showing up in the notes on this is frankly equal parts disturbing and completely expected.

I know that a lot of wincest shippers and "spn is about the brothers actually" people think that if you hate the finale it's purely because you're a heller who is upset about Dean and Cas not getting to make out, but I'd like to think that the notes on this poll are proving that to be categorically untrue.

I AM a heller, but Cas not being in the finale isn't even in my Top 3 reasons why I hate it so much. The main reason I hate 15x20 is because it completely flushes 15 years of character development down the shitter. You could watch 1x01 and then 15x20 one after the other and feel like you haven't missed anything that happened in between, so what the fuck was the point of the other 325 episodes?

I know that covid-protocols changed the plan, and that the team who were deemed essential enough to create those last two episodes did the best with what they were given. I know that Jensen has been quoted as saying he is proud of the performance he put into these episodes, and that certain people have twisted those comments to think that means he likes it (people misreading Jensen's tone is a whole other post); but I don't for a second think that being proud of something you've achieved automatically means it's good.

I also don't think there was ever going to be a good way to finish a 15-year journey where nothing ever truly stays dead. Death is not and has never been closure on Supernatural, so having it end with "and everybody died" is a fucking cop-out.

Even if Supernatural hadn't taken a 15-year journey through Sam and Dean finding out that "family don't end with blood; but it don't start there either", and it had remained a story that was just about their co-dependent trauma bond from a childhood of being raised by a one-track-minded monster hunter, how on earth was one of them dying bloody a success story? How was the other giving up everything he'd ever known a success story?

Add the complexity of the 325 episodes between 1x01 and 15x20 to the mix, and how on earth anybody can think that Dean still wanted to go out with a bang and Sam still wanted his apple pie life absolutely astonishes me?! As they each enveloped more and more people into their lives and their hearts, their motivations changed, as motivations are wont to do as you age from your 20s to your 40s. These are both multi-dimensional characters with changing hopes, dreams and desires that are shaped by the world around them.

In a story that is about family, fate and faith, the finale completely corrupts all three of those things. The Winchester brothers had their chosen family taken away from them, the manipulator of their fate was removed and left them completely directionless, and their faith was decided for them when they were thrust into a heaven (where their parents are supposedly happy together just down the way) that had been newly designed by their 4-year old foster son.

Throughout the entire series we are continuously told season finale after season finale that "there will be peace when you are done", but the Sam and Dean I know would not have felt at peace in that version of heaven. They would have had questions, and a lot of them, and a hell of a lot more work to do.

Don't forget to check out the other polls! There's a new one every day!

[subbyfoxelf]

[movie review] the golden compass (2007)

look, if you just look at it as a movie by itself it’s maybe not the worst? like, it’s a bit sterile, and a lot of the performances are surprisingly wooden considering all the big names on the cast, but like… it’s fine! it’s passable. it’s not the best, but it’s certainly not the worst.

if you have read the book… woof.

like… the broad strokes of the story are… mostly there? again, as previously mentioned, it’s weirdly sterile? like, there’s just some straight up dark shit in the book, and it’s pretty clear that deliberate pains were taken to tone that down? and in the process the entire message of the book just gets totally jettisoned. and like… despite it feeling like fully 50% of the dialogue in this movie is just exposition dumbs, it somehow also feels like all of the context that made the events of the book interesting is missing? which, again, is gonna happen when you go out of your way to tone down the serious themes of the book.

but obviously the biggest change is just… look, i remember my first viewing of this film. i was in a movie theater in springfield, illinois with several college friends who hadn’t read the book. and after lyra & the children escape from the oblation board facility (way out of order, but whatever) they’re relaxing on lee’s balloon, and things are slowing down & feeling kinda wind-downy, but i smirk thinking it’s a cute fakeout, and i smugly say, “and then everything was fine and they lived happily ever after!”

and then it faded to black.

and then the credits started rolling.

and i was like, “wait. what?”

… huh????

like, i get that there’s plenty of examples of movie adaptations doing shit like this and it working. the immensely successful lord of the rings movies (which this movie was deliberately trying to ape) moved all kinds of shit around to make the movies flow better. so, like. that can work…

the problem in this case is that the entire fucking point of the book was getting to that ending? that moment that totally turns everything lyra knows on its head??? and your plan was to hope that the movie somehow worked without that? without the entire point of the story??? and not only that, but that this totally hamstrung version of the story would somehow perform well enough financially to get a sequel? and then you’d have to do that hugely climactic shit at the beginning of the next movie?

i just cannot wrap my head around all the decisions that led to this point. and like, again, this is not the worst movie? but it still just feels like such a profound waste of a great story. it’s also pretty fucking pathetic that the catholic church made so much noise about boycotting it considering that the anti-church stuff is even more deemphasized here than it was in the first novel?

like, fuck, this movie had eva green in it, and she showed up to deliver exposition once, showed up to contribute to a really bad cgi fight once, and then showed up at the very end to say some shit for the trailer. yawn!

literally the only good thing about this movie is nicole kidman’s performance as mrs. coulter. i mean, holy shit. it feels like she was in a totally different movie than everyone else. wish we got that one instead of this one.

c-rank

[chuplayswithfire]

okay here it is my true toxic ofmd opinion:

i just think calico jack is neat. i don't love him (have you seen him????) but he is narratively just so fucking neat, and also as a character so fucking neat, because every time you look at him after watching episode eight you have to wonder: how much of this is an act? how much of this is calico jack, performer, in much the same way that edward teach is a natural performer?

because in episode eight we see ed performing the role of 'blackie', wild young pirate extraordinaire, and i've talked about his social chameleoning and how ed plays the roles that he needs to play at any given time, this is a man who is almost never being his most genuine self at any one time but the thing is: we meet calico jack when he is *also* performing a role. he is performing the role of calico jack, wild young pirate extraordinaire. he is very explicitly not being his most genuine self, because he is being the version of himself that can most aggravate stede AND most reassure ed that absolutely nothing about him has changed since the last time they saw each other.

so in much the same way that we don't really ever get to meet edward teach, whole person (though we see a very honest version of him for like a minute in episode 10 before everything goes horribly wrong), we never actually meet calico jack being just calico jack.

and this fascinates me, because the man that we see in calico jack is the wildest version of a pirate frat boy, hazing and laughing and all testosterone and rum fueled wild antics, all the while cleverly manipulating his old shipmate/good friend buddy pal person who he would risk his life for but who he absolutely doesn't have an emotional attachment to because those are gross and weak and weird (aka a fucking friend jack) as well as stede and the entire crew, all the for the explicit sake of saving ed's life.

the entire reason calico jack is out there on that ship causing havoc and being a big dick is because izzy hands got in touch with him to say that ed teach is out there in the direct path of the british fucking navy and he's going to go down if calico jack can't lure him away. and calico jack, a famous pirate in his own right, wanted by the british navy in his own right, goes. we don't ever hear that izzy offered up payment, so for all we know calico jack went out in a dinghy to pull ed from the line of danger for nothing more than the reward of his old shipmate not getting killed by the english.

and he calls izzy sentimental. izzy is at least going to get something out of this - izzy is going to get the revenge, and izzy is going to get stede dead. calico jack, as far as we can tell, is getting absolutely nothing out of this aside from ed's safety...

it's just fucking fascinating. he's such a dick. he's such a fucking dick, passive aggressive, callous with people's feelings and safety, manipulative, and literally dying because he's mad about his friend risking his life for some guy he thinks is a hack.

like, i genuinely think there's a chance he'll come back, just because there's so much potential for him to shed light on ed's past (and he has connections to other pirates that they might want to bring in, like anne bonny and mary read) but even if he doesn't, what we see in him shows is a man who's very much like ed - calculating, working the angles, performative, but the heart in him is hidden by the fact that he's a dick to characters we care about, particularly stede and killing karl - and yet, he's being a dick because he wants to make sure they get the hell out of there, him and blackbeard both, before the english come down on stede and his crew like the fist of god.

and its so interesting. it's fascinating. i don't like jack, but i see in him so much potential, and i'm not like. saying i think fandom needs to obsess over yet another white man, but i do think he's so interestingly twisted, in a way that's at once super toxic and yet utterly distinct from the other toxic mess of piracy in this show, whatever is going on with izzy hands.