#if theres any mistakes just ignore them for my sake

[snowthedemonfox]

was watching mlp with some friends today and it made me wanna draw davon again so i did

[julibeeline]

So this is my first request here and I'm kinda nervous, also english is not my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistake.

So, crew boys realizing they are in love with you, and they don't really not how to deal with that, so they try to avoid you until you ask they if they are angry or something? I'm trying to be specific but I don't really know how to explain it.

Thanks u very much ❤️

crew boys realizing they love you

a/n: i changed I few of them so they don’t get too repetitive, thanks for the request :) enjoy <33

masterlist

DREAM

dream first found out that he loved you when you were staying over for his face reveal stream.

you would reassure him that it would be okay, that it was all worth doing

he noticed the gentle look in your eyes when you made him feel better, forehead kisses when he was struggling to keep his nerves down

on the day of the face reveal, you were touching up his hair as he looked up at you

the focused look on your face as you tried to make this moment special for him made his heart swell with love.

“you nervous?” you ask him, eyes fixed on his hair.

“clay?” you say, being met with his silence

“i-im w-what? sorry?” he stammers, embarrassed.

“dont worry, im sure it’ll go just fine” you smile, rubbing his shoulder up and down.

as the stream started, you held his hand under the table; just out of frame.

no matter how important his face reveal was, the only think he could think about was you.

he was nervous, nervous about being in love with you though, not anything else

this was his big moment; why now?

as the stream came to an end, he quickly rushed to his room leaving you confused and worried.

“i think im in love with y/n.” he tells sapnap, watching his eyes go wide.

“y/n? like our y/n? the one whos in this house right now y/n?” sapnap says.

“yes that y/n, oh my god this is not good” dream whispers, running his hands through his hair in a panic.

“chill out dude its gonna be fine” sapnap says, standing up from his bed.

as the next few days past, dream used everything in him to avoid you.

he would give you short replies, and that is if they were extrememly necessary.

a quick “thank you” when you would hand him coffee, or a “goodnight” after being silent the whole day.

and by the 3rd day, you got so annoyed that you just had to let it all out.

“clay can you sit down for a second?” “sorry, i have to go d-“ “sit down, clay.”

he sat down nervously, faultering under your gaze

“why have you been ignoring me? like out of the blue you just- you just decide you hate me? is this because of the face reveal stream? what did i do wrong-” “you didnt do anything wrong, y/n. im in love with you.”

“what?” “can i kiss you?”

SAPNAP

sapnap first found out that he was in love with you the day karl started talking to you.

he couldnt help but clench his jaw, force his eyes away when you wrapped your arms around karl’s neck, giving him a tight hug

and the whole day he would subconsiously keep his hands on you

holding your waist when walking, shoulders when sitting, hands when you were talking to karl

“oh my god could you please let me go for one second i need to go to the bathroom” you finally say, fustrated

“what? oh sorry” he immediately pulled his hands away, for fucks sake, he wasnt even aware he was pulling at you everytime you took a step away from him

when you came back from the bathroom, his hands unknowingly reached out to hold you again, wrapping tightly around your shoulder

“whats up with you today? why’re you acting like this?” you ask, furrowing your eyebrows

“nothings wrong, y/n. just making sure i dont loose you, theres a lot of people here…includng karl” he mumbled the last part so quietly that you almost couldnt catch it

“karl?” you question, looking up at him

“what? no i didnt say anything.” sapnap replies, pulling you into another side of the room

“why arent you letting me talk to karl? you knew how i excited i was to meet him for the first time”

“jesus y/n, im not. im just making sure that youre safe, youve never even been to his place before.”

“i dont need you dragging me around like a puppy, i can handle myself. i just want to enjoy my time with karl”

“okay then fine! just leave me for karl.” he throws his hands up in the air, letting go of yours.

you turned to leave the room in irritation, letting out a sigh. why was he being so dramatic about this?

“i love you.” you hear from behind.

GEORGE

george first found out that he loved you when you had your first sleepover with him

from the moment you arrived at his house until when you fell asleep in his bed, he was getting used to a feeling that he had never felt for you before

at first he thought that it was the nerves, he had never spent the night with you and obviously he was bound to feel some kind of worry

but as time went by, he caught himself staring at you when you werent looking

like for example, he looked at the way your eyes would widen for a second when you found the lego piece you were looking for, or how the corners of your lips would curl up when you heard dream screaming something so loud through george’s headphones that you could hear him without them.

when he realized why he was feeling this way, he felt scared. there were so many things that came with being in love.

rejection, commitment, love, itself. like who even invited them!

you noticed how he had gotten quiet over the past few hours, not saying a word to you as a movie played in the background

“you all good george?” you ask, worried.

“yeah yeah im good.” he replies, not even looking towards your direction.

“you sure?”

“yes y/n, stop pushing it.” he spits out, coming out harsher than he intended

his gaze faultered as your face fell, looking down at your hands in embarrassment.

the awkward silence continued for a while, maybe too long even.

he would steal glances your way every once in a while, or reach his hands out for yours before retracting them the second after.

by the time george had thought of what to say, you’d fallen asleep next to him

his eyes softened as he looked over at you

grabbing a blanket, he gently placed it on you, making sure to cover your body

“i love you, y/n. hell, im in love with you.”

KARL

karl found out that he was in love with you when he first saw you.

you were working at a candle store, an apron on, welcoming customers that stopped by

as he saw your smile through the glass window, his feet dragged him into the store

you showed him around, laughing at his jokes that he himself knew were terrible.

he asked questions about each candle, only to spend more time with you

and as he said goodbye with 5 candles in hand, you gave him a wave off like every other customer

from that day on he frequently stopped by, checking if you were around.

and when you werent there in all of the times that he went, he grew fustrated

he probably meant nothing to you, just another customer that wanted to smell the candles that youve already shown 20 times today.

as he got impatient as the days passed, but he gave it one last try

and oh my god you were there!

his eyes lit up the moment he saw you from across the street, dusting some stupid shelf with the stupid smile of yours.

he walked in the store, going straight to you

“remember me?” he asked in a hurry.

“of course karl, how could i forget?” you welcome, giving him a warm side hug

“can i have your number? ive lost you too many times already”

and now you guys are dating, the “i love you’s” have been passed back and forth far too many times to count.

QUACKITY

quackity first found out that he was in love with you the day he saw you translating his spanish streams.

his eyes formed hearts as he snuck up behind you, looking at all the sentences you’d translated already

“what’re you doin?” he asks, giving you a kiss on the head

“jus’ translating your stream. i wanna know what youre saying” you reply, smiling to yourself

and as if he couldnt fall more, this made his heart beat out of his chest

“i can just tell you, you know?” he giggles.

“i prefer to to it myself, makes me feel proud” you answer, not looking up at him once.

he turned around for a second, looking up at the ceiling, scrunching his face up in adoration 

“god y/n i love you” he slips out.

“what?” you turn around wide eyed, looking up at him in surprise.

“oh shit-”

“i love you too.”

[babbling-idiot]

Herbert West Headcanons

Requested: "Hi! It's my first time requesting something here so I'm sorry for any mistakes<3 could I possibly ask for our favourite scientist, Herbert, switching the roles and convincing his s/o to go to sleep? Like, usually he's the one who sould be dragged to bed, but his partner is studying late a lot, that they begin to have problems with sleeping lately? Gn or fem reader, hc or fic > of your choice, I want you to feel comfortable with writing this! Also if you're not comfortable with this topic feel free to change anything or ignore this ask. Thank you in advance, love💗💓💖💗💖💕💗💓💖" -By anon

Warning: Nope

(Hello! So, I am very sorry for the long wait on this, I know its been a hot second but I hope you enjoy this!)

*****

He honestly never thought that he'd be the one to put you to bed

I mean he doesn't mind but damn did he rub off on you or something?

You are suppose to be better than him and actually sleep

Not stay up longer than he does

Be responsible for God sake

He doesn't like you being sleep deprived at all

So when he comes up to the room to sleep on the rarest occasion and he sees you up and wide awake he's confused

Did he actually stay up all night and now its the morning

When he looks at the bedside clock and sees that its actually 3 in the morning thats what gives him a wake up call

"Y/n? Why are you awake, its 3 in the morning."

You shake you head and go back to writing down what you were before

"Y/n answer me."

"Herb, listen I have this test coming up and its very important. Theres all these assignments that I have to complete before I take the test and they have to be correct. I have to pass this test." You say as you scribble something down but you curse and erase it, correcting it

He shakes his head

"When is it due?"

You shrug your shoulders

"Three, four days." He smiles and scoffs at you

He then walks over and closes your text book and grabs your papers before placing them together neatly and putting them in another place.

Even though at this point you are trying to grab your stuff from him

Hes doing pretty damn good at keeping it from you

Your completely livid, you had all this work and so little time

Just then you feel Herbert grab your arms and he stands you up right

He walks you over to the bed and starts to help you into some sleepwear

After doing so for you and himself he drags you into the bed

You're very reluctant and don't even want to go to sleep yet

But when you feel his arm around your waist and you his breath fanning over your neck and shoulder you forget all about the work

You feel yourself falling asleep and soon enough your out

He smiles to himself when he sees your eyes closed and your breathing calmed

He also soon falls into your footsteps and sleeps as well

Hes very happy he was able to get you to sleep

Though thats very hypocritical of both him and you, how all your efforts to get him to sleep and him refusing and you the same its all very funny to him

He cares way to much for you and to little about himself

He wants you to be rested and to succeed in your schooling that he's willing to go to sleep along side you for that to happen

*****

(Hello again, again I'm sorry for the wait and I hope you enjoyed this, if you did any kind of feedback would be amazing. Have a amazing day/night and stay safe out there in the world!)

[thinking1bee]

When it Reigns Part 5

Requested by Anonymous

Pairings: Kara Danvers x Reader

Tags: Angst, Kryptonian!Reader, Parent!Reader, Parent!Kara, Estranged Parent, Graphic Depictions of Injuries, Blood, Humor, Bad Dreams, Memory Loss

Everything Taglist: @sammy90682 @nobody13 @owloftheshadows @captain-josslett @camslightstories @worldovart @finleyfray @acertainredhead @sammm9068 @reginassecretlover

It took some more investigative journalism, but you and Kara found out that it was Edge who was behind poisoning the kids. He orchestrated the plan to have chemicals dumped into the pool, and then to frame Lena further by dumping the same chemicals into National City’s water supply. Luckily with some saving from Supergirl, Edge was thrown behind bars and a cure was made for the families afflicted. You sighed for a day well done and you were in the process of saying good night to Angel.

“Will Luke be okay?” she asked you and you smiled.

“Yes. He should be getting better as we speak.”

You leaned down and kissed her forehead when Angel froze.

“Hey what’s wrong?”

She blinked. “You have a hole in your shirt.”

You looked down to see what she was talking about. Sure enough, there was a tear in the fabric of your blouse, and you held it in confusion, wondering how it got there.

“Oh, weird,” you said, shrugging it off. “Sweet dreams, okay?”

Angel nodded before she closed her eyes and you left quietly, smiling fondly as your daughter drifted off to sleep. As you walked down the hall, you felt at the tear in your shirt, and as you kept playing with it, something cold and metallic fell from the torn threads and landed on the floor with a sharp clang. You paused, bending over to pick up the object, and when you inspected it, you saw that it was a bullet.

You were…shot.

And you didn’t feel it.

Your hands went to your stomach, feeling around for anything unusual. You even lifted your shirt to see if there was anything wrong. There was nothing. Just the expanse of smooth and unharmed flesh. You swallowed hard as you looked up, seeing nothing but the emptiness of the hallway in front of you. You couldn’t ignore any of this anymore. You needed answers, so you went into your room and packed a small travel bag. You’d be gone for a day tops and hopefully, you would find what you needed. As you packed, you dialed for Kara, and she answered in the first ring.

“Y/n is everything okay?” she asked, and you smiled. Your darling wife, ever the worrier.

“I’m fine babe,” you replied with the smile playing at your lips. “I was wondering if you would be okay with watching Angel. I need to take a trip.”

You could practically hear Kara fix her glasses while shifting her weight from one foot to the other. “Is everything okay?” she asked again.

“I think so. I just need to pay a visit to my mother.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

The question was justified. The relationship between you and your adopted parental figure was less than stable. You’d soon go to hell voluntarily before stepping foot in her house again, but this was important. Something was going on with you and you needed answers. You had to start somewhere.

“I’ll be fine, I promise.”

Kara accepted your promise, trusting that you would be fine like you said. “Okay, just come back soon.”

You smiled. “I love you.”

“I love you more,” you replied, and you disconnected the call.

***

Kara nibbled her lips, staring at the screen when you disconnected the call. She couldn’t help but think that something wears wrong and that you wanted her to think that everything was okay. Whatever it was, she knew that she would have to wrap this up soon. Angel was already home, and judging by the clock on Kara’s phone, was also in bed.

“…Kara?”

Kara looked up to see everyone in the DEO staring at her and she hastily put her phone back in her pocket.

“Sorry.”

“Is everything okay?” Alex asked and Kara shrugged. That was all she could do.

She was so worried about you. Ever since Angel told her about your selective memory loss, she had been so preoccupied with you that it was evoking distracting. She knew she should have followed up with that. She trusted you, as she did, but something was telling her to dive deeper into it and she ignored it. What could be going on that you felt the need to reach out to a woman that you had spoken to in years? Was everything that bad? And what about when Angel got hurt. Angel told her that it was a city light pole that fell on top of her, but she had been less than forthcoming with the details as to how she got free from under it. Things weren’t making any sense.

“Kara?”

Kara blinked and focused on everyone again. Alex had asked her a question and she went on a mental spiral.

“I’m fine,” she said quickly, but everyone looked at each other with skepticism. If Kara was truly okay, she wasn’t very convincing about it.

“Are you sure?” Alex asked, mirroring Kara’s early question to you. She nodded.

“Yes. Let’s focus on what caused the earthquake.”

Alex gave her once last look, her eyes searching. Kara nodded, her eyes focused on hers, knowing that she would know what it meant. We’ll talk later. Alex nodded before turning her attention back to the giant screens in front of her.

“Go ahead, Winn.”

Winn typed on his tablet before he dragged his finger across the screen, his wrist flicking, before what was on his tablet appeared on screens for everyone to see. On them was a map, with a single dot highlighted on a specific location. From the dot came virtual shockwaves that pulsed from the single location and spread outwards.

“I was able to pinpoint the exact location of the earthquake,” he explained. “But theres nothing out there.”

Beside him, J’onn nodded and crossed his arms. “I flew from the center and covered the entire area of coverage. There’s nothing there except cracked earth and debris.”

“So, if there’s nothing there, where did the earthquake come from?” Kara asked.

“That’s the mystery,” Winn said as he turned his attention back to the pulsating dot on the screen. Kara watched as the shockwaves emanated from the point over and over, the feeling of foreboding sending a chill down her spine.

***

You pulled up to your mother’s house and put the car in park. She still lived all the way out in Metropolis and was still in the same house and everything. It was like nothing changed. Well almost nothing. She may have stayed the same, but you changed entirely. No matter what happened, you promised to keep your cool. There was a reason why you never so much as sent her a Christmas card. So, you took a deep breath and squared your shoulders, before getting out of the car and knocking on the door. It took a bit of knocking but she finally answered, and she looked at you like she had seen a ghost.

“Y/n?”

“Hello, Elizabeth,” you greeted. “May I come in?”

After some small talk and a glass of water that you still hadn’t drank from, it was finally time to address the elephant in the room. Though if it were up to you, the elephant wouldn’t need to be pointed out anyway. Just acknowledge it and move on.

“I haven’t seen you since…” Elizabeth swallowed thickly, a nervous chuckle escaping her. “Well, you know.

“I couldn’t imagine why you’d expect me to keep in touch after you kicked me out.”

“I did that to teach you a lesson!”

She still believed that? Even after all these years?

“That’s odd because that wasn’t what it felt like.”

She looked away from you, her eyebrows furrowed in hurt, and you had to resist the urge to scoff. Her little act wasn’t going to work on you. You decided that you had enough with strolling down memory lane.

“Do you know where I can find my birth parents?” you asked. At that, her head snapped up and she met your eyes.

“Why?”

“That doesn’t matter. Do you know or not?”

She didn’t answer, she only stared at you, and you could feel your irritation grow. You never asked her of anything, not since she kicked you out, and now that you were asking about your real parents, after all these years, now she wanted to give you a hard time???

“I’m sorry,” was all she said. You smirked and she looked at you.

“You have got to be kidding me. Then at least tell me which adoption agency you adopted me from.”

Elizabeth shook her head, and you actually snapped your fingers, pointing at her as your irritation morphed into rage.

“I’ve never asked you for anything once you threw me out, and this is how you want to play this?!”

“That was to teach you a lesson,” she repeated, like the explanation would make everything okay.

“That what?” you demanded. “That it was never okay for me to like who I liked?”

“You know that I didn’t approve of your homosexual escapades.”

“Oh yeah, and then I dated a guy to make you happy. Good thing for me that he knocked me up and left the moment he found out I was pregnant. I was 19! I needed someone there for me! I needed my mom!”

“Y-you were pregnant?” she whispered, horrified that she hadn’t known until now.

“Yes! And you would have known that if you had just listened to me!”

Elizabeth had thrown you to the side after finding out that you had sex with him. She wanted a good Christian daughter, one that followed every rule in the Bible. That wasn’t you, and no matter how much she tried to force you to learn, or how much she forced you to go to church, it would never be you. Even now. You were happily married and trying your damnedest with your daughter. The relationship with her sperm donor may have been a huge mistake, but Angel never will be that. She was so much more. She was the reason you never gave up, and the woman that was in front of you, was the reason why you never learned to be a good mom. You spent your whole life being what she wanted for her sake.

“Did you keep it?” Elizabeth whispered.

“Her name is Angel,” you said sternly, and you had the satisfaction of watching her flinch. “And I guess by technicality you do have a granddaughter.”

“How is she?”

You stared at her, really stared at her, incredulous that she thought that she had the right to ask about Angel.

“If you think that I would let you, with your religious, Bible thumping poison and rhetoric around her, then I must be on crack.”

Elizabeth sighed. “I’m sorry.”

It was way too late for sorry. That wouldn’t work on you either.

“Do you know anything about my birth parents or the adoption agency that you got me from?” you asked again.

“Why do you want to know so bad?”

You had to stop yourself from screaming in from frustration. Instead, you took a deep breath and looked down.

“Things have been happening to me, Elizabeth,” you started as you looked at her intensely. I keep blacking out to do only God knows what and then I have no recollection of going anywhere or saying anything. Earlier this week, a pole fell on my daughter, and I lifted it clear above my head and threw it away as though it weighed nothing. Yesterday I was at a press conference when someone open fired into the crowd. I was shot, Elizabeth, and I didn’t feel anything. I pulled the crushed bullet from my clothes but there were no marks, no cuts, no anything. The past few weeks have been weird, and I swallowed the anger I have with you to ask you for your help. Now if you know anything, now would be the time to tell me.”

Elizabeth looked at you and was quiet. It seemed like she wasn’t going to say anything until she nodded her head, deciding something internally, before she looked at you.

“Follow me. I want to show you something.”

Part 6

[the-volume-is-astronomical]

The Crown, The Sword, and The Gay

The Tower

A/N: mi gente im just trying something out and seeing if people like it :] ive had this done for like months and months on end and i finally decided to share it so em enjoy 

First | Previous| Next

words: 2380

summary: Roman’s stomach is making it very clear that this talk wasn’t going to end well... as long as he doesn’t end up in that tower.

pairings: eventual prinxiety, eventual intrulogical, eventual moceit 

warnings: some potty language (not much), stress, anxiety, disappearance mention, flashback, crying

(let me know if theres any other)

Roman felt himself waking up, maybe because of the stupidly bright sun hitting his eyes, he didn’t know how that was possible since he remembered closing the red velvet curtains shut tight, so he didn't have this exact issue. So, when he heard some ruffling and things being moved around he wasn’t all that surprised. 

¨Rise and shine, you little brat¨ Ruth said in a very tired but demanding voice. 

¨Oh dear nurse, allow me five more minutes¨ Roman whined putting a pillow over his eyes so he could block out the rude sun.

¨Oh, flattery will get you nowhere, mister.¨ Roman could hear Ruth moving around the room, preparing breakfast no doubt. Roman took the pillow off his face and sat up, hair a wreck, and his eyes squinting because of the light coming from the window.

¨And he finally rises,¨ Ruth said sarcastically.

¨Yeah, yeah, the dashing prince has awoken.¨ Roman said half asleep. Ruth helped him sit down so he didn’t trip over anything and started serving him breakfast, she wasn’t going to wait for him to finish eating as she was already heading for the big oak doors. 

¨Wait!¨ Roman sobered up, Ruth flinched a little at the shout but turned around anyway ¨Can I do anything for you?¨ She asked.

¨ Come eat with me, you for sure haven’t eaten anything today.¨ Ruth went to argue but closed her mouth when she noticed she, in fact, had not eaten.

 She sat down in the chair in front of the royal, Roman made a few hand gestures as if to show she was open to take anything, she knew the monarch wouldn’t eat until she had settled for something so, she took a piece of bread and started eating, as did he.

After a few moments of silent eating Ruth spoke up ¨I still don't understand, after all these years you haven’t become a spoiled brat that doesn't care for his servant¨ Roman didn't even look up at her he just said ¨I guess you raised me well.¨ Ruth almost choked on her bread and looked at Roman as if he had gone insane. “Oh come on don't be so humble Ruthie!¨

She still looked at him confused and a little annoyed at the nickname but mostly surprised he would say anything of the sort, ¨Ruth, you are my nurse. You have been with me my entire life, You fed me when I was a baby for god sake! I consider you a mother, even if I have another mother in the throne room right now,” Roman shivered at the thought of having to talk to his parents after the events of the past week but continued anyway “and I sure as hell think of you as the person who raised me.¨ 

Once he had finished he immediately put a mouth full of food and kept eating as if hadn’t given that speech. Ruth still looked shocked but cleared her throat ¨Well, then I made you a sap!¨ Roman started laughing ¨How will your future spouse ever forgive me?¨ Roman burst out laughing and Ruth gave a small chuckle. 

Ruth stood up and went to Roman's closet to gather his outfit for the day, while he finished breakfast. She threw the clothes at him “Hey!¨ Roman made his trademark over dramatic gasp. She sighed “I unfortunately also gave you my dramatics…”

 “And I don’t resent you for that!” Roman screamed back with a big smile on his face. 

Ruth looked like she had something on her mind. Roman didn’t have to wait much before she said what that was, he never did. ¨Would that make you and my Remy brothers?¨ she said, actively ignoring the prince’s comments. Roman stood up going towards his shoji screen to change behind. ¨Ha! We already consider each other brothers so it wouldn’t be much of a change.¨ Ruth started making his bed “Well this is new information to me.¨ Roman giggled a bit 

¨Remy´s supposed to be back by noon, he passed a lot of territories to deliver this message so I sure hope he’s alright¨ Roman has always thought she was a worried mother even to him when he went on long trips.

Roman stepped out from behind the screen and reassured her ¨ He’s fine! He may act reckless but he's very calculating… but expect him a few hours later than what the estimated time of return” Roman slipped away looking for his shoes. ¨Oh and why is that?¨ she asked, hands on her hips, Roman gave a nervous chuckle. 

Shouldn't have let that slip.

“Roman…” Ruth said in a warning tone. Remy was going to kill him but he didn’t want to die at his nurse’s hands “Remy’s been... seeing... this person a-and when his message trip aligns with where they live… he spends some time with the person so…” Ruth looked at him as if deciding something, “As Remy’s mother, I thank you for telling me the truth..” Roman was relieved “But, as your mother, I have to say…YOU SNITCH! Snitches get stitches for a reason!” Roman laughed genuinely and Ruth joined.

After their giggle fit, they heard someone knock on the door. Ruth went to answer the door, it was a guard “His and her highness request the prince’s presence,” Ruth thanked the guard and turned around and Roman looked mortified, “Roman, you have to talk to them.” Roman had never heard Ruth speak that soft. Roman only felt dread “Ruth I don't want to go” He was genuinely petrified.

“I understand, but they are very understanding and I believe they wouldn't punish you for simply trusting the wrong person” Roman shook his head “ They’re already so protective. They always had me under knight or guard surveillance but now they might do something so I won’t be able to sneak by” Roman was panicking and Ruth noticed, she walked up to him. And took his hand “Roman they just want the best for you…” Roman took his hand away from her own “No! They are just afraid they aren’t going to have an heir after one of them ran away.” Roman's hands were in his hair and his eyes started to glaze over.

Roman was very much not over his brother's apparent “disappearance”

“I understand Remus vanishing has affected your parents over protectiveness, BUT they have always aimed to protect you but after what happened...can you really blame them for it?” Roman sighed, Ruth forced his hands out of his hair, he took a shaky breath to calm down “No, but getting hurt is part of life! So what if I trusted the wrong person? Everyone does!” He gestured to the sky as if it was the only person listening, he felt so defeated. 

“Well I can't change anything so, you should tell your parents that!” She didn’t know what to say to make things better. “I’ll try, let’s just hope they at least try to listen” he left it there and headed out of his bedroom’s oak doors, he never liked disagreeing with Ruth. 

 Roman walked down the long hallway towards the throne room but, of course, he wasn’t alone because that would be too much to ask apparently. Instead he was being escorted to see his parents by the guard that had informed him his parents required him. He already knew what they were going to talk to him about and he was dreading it.

Why did he have to make such a mistake?

Did the universe want him to not trust anyone after what happened?! If it would make the sinking feeling in his stomach leave then he would happily oblige.

The guard stopped at the throne rooms doors and Roman took a deep breath as the guard gave him side eye glance and opened the doors, “You required my presence?” Roman spoke trying to keep his voice steady and his head high, “Yes, Roman, we would actually like to talk to you about last week's event…?” He phrased it as a question a little too late. Roman’s father, King Leonardo, wasn’t an emotionally driven person and never was truly soft with anything he said, but he cared. The way he was soft spoken with Roman was just having the opposite effect that his father wanted.

Roman’s mother, Queen Victoria, was very comforting and always tried to shield her children from harm's way, but coming from a family of royals, she didn't have an example to follow but she wanted to be there for her child. “Roman, my little lion heart, I need you to keep in mind this is for your safety...ok?”  Following everything by the book, always looking and being her best, so she would be a good example even if she wasn't nurturing, all she wished was for Roman to know she loved him and Remus with her whole being, Roman just gave her a tense nod as a response. 

Roman’s Father spoke up, “Roman, you're going to be under knight supervision at all times,” That wasn't as bad as Roman expected, he basically already was! Anything but to be stuck in that damn tower “...And you have to stay in the south tower-” ...He should have knocked on wood. 

“Father, I did nothing wrong! I shouldn't be punished for this-” Romans mother spoke up, she knew both her son and husband could be hot headed. She wanted to stop anything before it got the chance to begin “Roman this isn't to punish you! We want to protect you-” The Queen sounded like she was pleading with her son.

Roman did not hear her plea or just ignored it “...For how long do I have to stay there?” Roman’s mother spoke up, “Don't worry, you'll be there maximum 2-” 

“Indefinitely.” 

The King spoke in a cold unforgiving tone, Roman knew he had messed up big time. Victoria turned to her husband “Leo, we agreed he wouldn't be there for more than 2 fortnights, we agreed on that.” The Queen seemed upset but was obviously attempting not to show such emotion. 

“Those were the rules we agreed to when he was a child and he would grant being punished” Both of Roman’s parents were staring at each other, showing they weren't going to back down.

Roman spoke, “Understood.” His voice was mostly monotone but tight, Victoria turned to him with an apologetic gaze. Roman shook his head. It was his own fault, his mother shouldn't blame herself for his actions. 

“I'll tell Ruth, so we can pack.” Roman turned to leave but his father had more to say. “Before you go, Hugo won't be your assigned knight. One of the new recruits is climbing in status and popularity very quickly and he agreed to-” “babysit” Roman cut in. “-protect you. As long as I recommended him to Queen Marie for her armada” 

As if things couldn't get any better, he had to meet this new recruit, he hoped they would at least get along. Roman just nodded and opened the door to leave. At that moment, Roman’s father called the guard that had escorted Roman to get the new recruit as soon as possible, he just left as quickly as he could. 

His parents knew that not being around people and not being able to talk were some of the worse things that could happen to him. They decided it was going to be the way to punish him. Though, he never stayed for more than a month, now he understood why. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------

As Roman- basically power walked- back to his room, his brain tortured him with memories of his 7 year old self being forced onto the tower for the first time.

No! Please it was an accident-!

I won't do it again!

I won't- Please! 

That was all he said as his father signaled the guards to take him, his mother not being able to look, turned her head away, trying to ignore every motherly instinct in her body to stand up and comfort her child. 

The guards dragged him out of the castle- the only home he knew- and shoved him in a carriage, where Ruth was waiting for him. Ruth had always been happy around him but her expression was unreadable -looking back she seemed angry, he just hadn't seen her that way before- but, Roman didn't care. He threw himself onto Ruth and sobbed his tiny heart out, Ruth trying her best to calm him down, he eventually fell asleep. Three hours later, he was woken up by Ruth.

“Were here, principito”

Roman was scared. Ruth saw it in his eyes. 

“Come on! You offend me, you really think I would let them take you to a scary place?” 

The little royal could only muster a small “no”. Ruth took his hand and walked with him toward a tower. Roman thought it was beautiful, that's the day he figured beautiful things can hurt you. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Roman never got used to it. He always dreaded the ride there, all the build up to the feeling of nothingness. When he looked up at the tower, he got the same feeling that he did when he was 7, Roman learned to not look up. He’d always prefer being in the tower when he was a kid because, back then they allowed Ruth to stay behind with him. Now she would only go in the carriage with him and leave.

After they stopped allowing Ruth to stay with him, at least he had Hugo to bother, by asking him for stories of his adventures. He didn't have that anymore.

The only adventure story he had now was a vibrant red book, in the book shelf of the tower, the only fictional book in his whole collection. He will admit, it was a very smart move on his parent’s part. They always monitored what he read, filled his whole book shelf in the tower with Philosophy, Math, and Royalty etiquette. When he begged for weeks on end for an adventure book they granted him one but, they made sure it was the only book that was fictional. They wouldn't give him an adventure book based on real events, No! That would be giving Roman too much hope. 

Good move.

[filipinoizukuu]

pls tell me more of ur fic pet peeves

K OSMFKS OKAY MAN. man. HSDBBSJDJS

so i have like. a FUCK ton of pet peeves for fics, and i just wanted to say first that fanfic should not be placed in any boxes or standards because it is freely written and it is something meant to be enjoyed. these are my opinions and all peeve me to only a certain degree (meaning it squicks me out at worst)—so if you are a fic writer and you find yourself doing any of these things, do NOT take it to heart and just know i love you for doing what you do and i wish you all the best ♡

im gonna give reasons why certain things peeve me so i dont just sound like im bitching but generally, when reading ANY fics, i dislike the ff:

- long paragraphs with no breaks. bro i have adhd i cant go through all of this im going to get LOST.

- underlining, bolding, italicizing, AND capitalizing statements for emphasis like sir its chill i think i get the point. imho if you wrote your scene well enough and paced it properly, the most you'll need is an italics and maybe an exclamation mark. u gotta trust ur own writing and the reading comprehension of your audience.

- jittery perspective jumps especially when its fic about characters who use the same pronouns and youre constantly shifting the thoughts being presented. it... gets kinda confusing.

- FIRST PERSON POV. ITS NOT BAD I JUST GET SO JARRED BECAUSE SASUKE UCHIHA IS DOING WHAT TO ME??

everything else like grammar and punctuation and spelling is literally just. whatever. like as long as i get your point i really dont care. sometimes writers dont speak english fluently. sometimes writers just fuck up and dont have betas. sometimes writers just post their chapters at 3 am and leave all their mistakes out for god. i have no right to judge.

for personal bnha fic pet peeves, ig most of my annoyance lies on characterization and my own personal beliefs

- i already said it previously but i cannot STRESS how much i dislike the whole "fuck redemption arcs and fuck all authority figures except LoV for some reason" theme. it annoys me and i just flat out dont agree with it

- HATE tropes that reduce deku to being like 🥺👉👈 uwu okie soft helpless bean. theres nothing wrong with it if thats how you prefer deku, but i just get annoyed by it

- ANYTIME BKDK HAS AN UNEQUAL DYNAMIC. again. nothing wrong with exploring it in fanfiction. i just dislike reading fics that make either deku or bakugou blatantly weaker than the other. i love quirkless deku fics but i hate ones where he's also characterized as amounting to nothing and still acts like bakugous punching bag/okay with bakugou disrespecting him. their whole dynamic in canon is built on a great deal of respect

- speaking of bkdks power dynamic, FRICK GOSH I HATE SEEING FICS WHERE DEKU "realizes bakugous been abusing him for years!" and gets him expelled from ua and everyone claps. like. LIKE??? N. NO???? thats not how it works 😭

- all might slander. also unjustified or unnuanced endeavor slander where they dont tackle the complexity of his character. also also unjustified or unnuanced bakugous mom slander. this ones a bit controversial so i wont talk about it much.

- sexist homophobic or racist bakugou. im kicking that away. no. especially fics where bakugous past bullying is explained as "repressed homosexuality". i like making that as a joke but i genuinely do no believe in it.

- BAD MOM MIDORIYA INKO. ITS A TROPE I SEE SOMETIMES AND IT MAKES ME CRY I DONT HAVE A RATIONAL REASONING FOR IT I JUST LOVE INKO

- fics where ochako is obviously very reduced into a supporting figure with absolutely no dimension except being a supportive character and maybe having a shoe-horned wlw romance just for the sake of making her unavailable. shes my fave bnha girl and sometimes in fics i can literally FEEL her character being butchered to only show up when deku needs Love Advice. *note that this only applies when literally every other male character has something else going on for them and its just the females being sidelined into Boy Advice Givers and Talking Sense.

- fics that very obviously belittle asian principles and culture. family means a GOOD DEAL to a lot of asian cultures and fics that spout "if you dont like your family then leave and find your own! its that simple!" usually sound incredibly ignorant or outright claim moral superiority to the weight of familial bond in asian culture. same with manners, respect, and discipline.

- jeALOUSY/CHEATING FICS OK IM SELFISH I ONLY WANT BKDK TOGETHER LIKE IM DEKUBOWL ONLY SOMETIMES BUT BKDK ALWAYS HAS TO END UP TOGETHER

- "murdering is ok if its characters i hate 🥰" ... listen, you do you bestie but like. no thanks. if i wanted to read about mineta getting murdered by momo with a pistol i dont think id be opening a bkdk soulmarks au

- any dekusquad slander 😭 i love them okay

- *kicks mean/bakugou-hating todoroki out the door*

- *kicks 'all mha characters text, talk, and behave like 14 year old stan twt users (no offense ok i speak like that too)' fics out the door*

- *kicks bratty deku and/or bakugou out the door*

thats. all i can think of atm.

[ryollie]

update post, gonna put under a read more. its gonna be rambly and honest abt how i feel on certain things, why i’ve been gone and what im gonna do from now on etc. tw for mental illness !

i’ve been inactive for a month, almost 2 i think? its kind of painful to evaluate everything to be honest. i’ve had my blog for half a year. i really loved and had fun in the hphm fandom and ive met great people. people come and go, and im alright with that. when i first joined, i never expected so many people would enjoy ollie, my first ever mc. i was just so so happy and wanted to draw and share more of my oc stories and creations with everybody. as time gone on, i started feeling isolated, and slowly started getting more hate for various reasons and i felt very overwhelmed. 

i’ve always tried my best to be kind to everybody and understand things from different perspectives but i realise that there are some people you can just never see eye to eye with no matter how hard u try. my mistake was trying too hard to get along with everybody. it rlly sucks when you find leaked convos of ppl you thought u were friends with insulting you, ppl you drew for and thought you had fun with talking smack behind ur back. its alright to not like me or my content ! i just dont see why ppl would interact positively with me and act a different way once my back is turned. i think its pretty...ugly, to be honest. if u rlly had an issue with me, dm me and lets talk it out civilly. i dont shy away from an honest conversation; if i truly did anything wrong i will admit to my mistakes, apologize and hopefully change for the better. we are all human, its normal to fuck up and theres always room for change.

its easy to say just ignore the hate and move on, and believe me thats exactly what i tried to do. it was really uncomfortable and i felt like i was just putting on a mask to remain positive, sociable and welcoming to everybody i interacted with. i did that for 3 months and overtime, it just crumbled. i felt really paranoid everytime i had an interaction, because i saw so much negativity about me that i wish i did not that i started to doubt every interaction i had. i didnt know if someone was pretending to be kind to me, i started to think what if they had heard bad things about me from others and were judging me etc, its a lot to handle. im a paranoid scizophrenic and feelings of paranoia manifest into auditory hallucinations for me. these feelings arent just a bad gut feeling. i hear people talking about me and how theyre going to hurt me because they hate me etc. its honestly really exhausting and its hard to tell whats real and fake and it makes me disassociate.

people believe what they want to believe. there’s always two sides to a story. i’m tired of being painted as somebody bad because of petty gossip, i’m tired of always needing to defend myself. once you’re on someone’s bad side, you’re judged and nitpicked for every single minor detail. its awful. if others vent, its alright because everyone has their problems and deserve to be heard! if i vent, its me being whiny and playing a victim card. people can easily twist your words to suit their narrative. words can hurt like a bitch, you know. i wish more people realised there’s weight in their words. 

and to address this if its unclear; i’m no longer in a relationship and i ended it myself. i just dont feel like im in a good place mentally to sustain a rs for a very, very long time. i would also appreciate it if people can stop associating me with my previous partner. i do not want anything to do with them. i wont disclose any details out of respect but please respect how i feel on this.

to sum up i’m sorry if i’ve ever hurt anybody. i’m just tired of the negativity and the indirects. people who know me, know me. i always try to be kind but i have my limits too. i disappeared for two months because i couldnt cope with it, but I'm willing to try again. i’ll be very cautious with who i interact from now on, and i hope you can understand why. im just protecting myself. i want to have fun drawing and creating content for me and my friends and not for the sake of others, as it should have been from the very start. i just want to have fun again and to slowly learn to trust people. thank you if you read this to the very end, it was just an honest and long ramble of how i’ve been feeling. i hope i can share more of ollie and my other ocs with everybody and that with time, i can let go of the painful things i’ve experienced before. 

[fizzypunks]

in hands and intentions

fandom: naruto wordcount: 3.1k/finished rating: pg summary: neji doesn’t know what to do with loving hands. thankfully, shikamaru does

AO3

note: i just... love neji, and shikamaru, and shikaneji so so much. this is just a one off cause i couldn’t get it out of my mind. thank you for reading! <3

<>

Shikamaru’s hands were delicate, and it never ceased to astound Neji -- no matter how many times he was held and caressed by them. These hands that cast shadows and killed and were capable of so much violence, were simply incapable of creating it of their own free will. 

 His hands traced up the clothed sides of Neji’s stomach like the way spring winds graze the fields at night.

  How are you so tender with me?

Neji doesn’t understand it, and it hurts, much like the mark that graced his forehead, but so much sharper and so infinitely more confusing. It’s frightening and soft, like pillows and lazy days and morning sun, luxuries he couldn’t have ever imagined, not as a kid, and not now. Shikamaru is soft and gentle, and Neji doesn’t know if he can reach into his mind and sift hard enough to find such a moment existing before this. He sifted before, and he wanted to throw the till away when all that came up was rubble.

 Neji dipped his head into Shikamaru’s shoulder, hair falling between them, and he breathes, because that’s all he can do when just a second ago they were kissing.

  How are you so tender? How are your hands so gentle?

 They’re sitting - there’s a discarded bottle of sake pushed just off to the side, and yet its seal stayed as perfect and untouched as it had when they first sat down in the grass. They’re face to face, legs craning with their feet kicked up in the grass to either side of each other, and though it’s comfortable, something is different this time.

 Neji can’t place it, and it’s frustrating to be able to sense, but to not  see .

 “Hmm, Neji?” Shikamaru whispered, wet lips at his left ear as his hand carded through his long, mocha hair. “Neji? Are you with me?”

 Neji nods, forehead bumping against the soft cotton of Shikamaru’s shirt. He doesn’t want to speak, because for the first time, he thinks he doesn’t have the control to keep his voice from shaking.

 Shikamaru probably hears the pauses and knows theres somthing hidden in them, and Neji doesn’t know where to go or what to do when Shikamaru’s hands find their way to his back, stroking sweet, soft circles into him. It was like a hot brand had just touched him, except it wasn’t  actually  anything like that. It was the recoil before the burn, only to discover there would be no burn at all.

 And maybe that’s what he’s aching for right now. Maybe that burn was too expected, maybe he’d rather have a reason to flinch, than to flinch without cause. And above it all, he wanted to flinch and not feel guilty for flinching --

 If only Shikamaru had hurt him, he wouldn’t feel the gnawing teeth in his gut that told him  just wait,  and even louder was  how dare you wait?

 Their legs are overlapped like clumsy children, and no, they’re anything but clumsy children.  Neji feels more like a child now than he did when he was one, and he doesn’t think it’s possible to feel any more low or crumbling, except when Shikamaru speaks, and Neji can do nothing except will the tears away.

 And he so often does speak, at just the right moment, with just the right words, like he does now. 

 “If you want, we can stay like this.”

 “Gods,” and Nejis voice breaks out in a whimper, though there was a ripping force through his chest that he had no idea existed within him that, now awakened, might never cease. 

 “We can stay here, if you want.” 

 There must be an angel within Shikamaru, Neji thinks, because he held him all the same. Moments before, they were kissing passionately and breathlessly. Neji’s hands were fiercely searching for Shikamaru’s, and he was demanding more and more, and then, now, here he was, shedding tears he never dared shed before - and even the thought of tears brought pain to his temples that broke out like lightning across his forehead. He flinched away again at the memories painted onto his eyelids, and it feels like a mistake.

 God, the memories. There were too many of them, like crumbs that give way to avalanches.

 “You know, when I was growing up, I didn’t think much about romance.”

 Why was his voice so matter of fact? Holding Neji close to him, fingers carding gently down his neck and shoulders as he combed his hair, Shikamaru was there like a pillar of sincerity that spoke only of certainties.

 How dare he speak so steadily of things like they were simply inherent and unavoidable truths? He was solid, a pillar, unfaltering and calm. Underneath his fingertips, Neji’s shaking hands were anything but.

 “And it didn’t really bother me, cause it sort of seemed like a hassle more than anything. It seemed like a lot of squabbling.”

 Neji listened, willing, this time, for his heart to retreat back into his veins and arteries and away from his ears.

 “I didn’t understand others, either, when they asked me about crushes and romance and shit like that. You know, I thought Ino was so dumb for how much she wanted Sasuke, like she was brainwashed or something… I thought love was a cult.”

 Neji laughed with Shikamaru, rolling his hands under his chest so he could wrap them around his waist.

 “But then there’s you.”

 Neji tensed, on habit. He hates that he does it, in moments that are supposed to be tender, but he can’t stop it. 

 (He can’t help it, and he hates it.)

 “And I guess you could say it was a shock when I finally found out what they were talking about.”

 Neji wants to speak so badly, but if he were to, he’d be speaking too much. Too much about how small he feels now, and the way he doesn’t know how to touch back. How to not break, how to be truly gentle...

 Shikamaru leans his head into Neji’s, and he’s relaxed, and his weight seems to be Too Much and Not Enough. It's like he might get crushed, but also at the same time like he’s never felt more at home and if getting crushed was the payment, then he’d be okay to pay it.

 “I… didn’t believe in it either,” Neji says, finally. His throat is dry, and he feels like any given word might turn brittle into rubble yet again. “And when I did see it, in others, it was from as far away as possible. It was from a cage and… I believed in it. I saw it everywhere, in the streets, at the Academy, and I knew it existed because so many other people felt it and spoke of it and  lived it and I… !”

 His lungs ached, out of breath, but he continued. “And I believed it wouldn’t ever…”

 Shikamaru hums, and waits, because he’s good at that sort of thing.

 “I thought nothing so…” 

 The words  kind  and  gentle  and most horribly of all  tender  dissolve on his tongue like sugar, and he can barely scrape them together enough to say it. He doesn’t want to cry again, but he can’t help it this time --

 Love feels like weakness when you can’t hold back any part of yourself, and Neji sinks into Shikamaru like he’s trying to become closer than his shadow. “Nothing…  nothing I ever imagined, would be so kind.”

  Kind like you, tender like you, caring like you.

 The hands around his shoulders, the embrace that kept Neji from feeling like this was just a dream, grew tighter, and Shikamaru kissed Neji’s neck because it was the closest thing he could kiss.

 “I feel like I’ve just woken up, and I didn’t see the scars on me till now, and it’s making me sick.”

 Neji’s voice used to be laced in vitriol -- every word he felt leaving his mouth was scornful, and heated, and filled with the energy of a kid stuck in a place neither heaven or hell could find, let alone salvage. It’s been years since then, but it’s only been seconds since his words started to fill with something grander. Sometimes love, sometimes sorrow, most of the time he doesn’t know.

 “That’s pretty fucked up,” Shikamaru whispered.

 Neji nodded. “I accepted it, too.”

 Shikamaru nodded into him again, chin hooked over Neji’s shoulder. “Like fate, right? I remember that used to be your thing.”

 Neji laughed, but there was no humor to be found. “It  was my fate.”

 Neji hears the smile in Shikamaru’s voice. “It’s a good thing you don’t believe in that any more, then, isn’t it?”

  Thank gods  , and Neji pulled away, slowly, so that they were eye to eye. He doesn’t understand why he can’t  look  Shikamaru in the eye; when he tries he ends up crumbling all the same. “I haven’t believed in it in a long time… and yet I can’t remember if I ever stopped believing that something like this…”

 He gestures between them with his right hand, and settles it on the top of Shikamaru’s thigh, tentatively, like glass that might break if pressed. “I didn’t know this would happen.”

 Shikamaru sighed, but not in the way that meant he was tired or bored or put up, just saddened -- he brought his hands down from their perch on Neji’s shoulders, and gently rested them on the sharp line of his jaw.

 “Hey, look at me.”

 He couldn’t.

 “Neji…”

 He  couldn’t , but he did. 

 Shikamaru was beautiful. He tried so hard to understate that fact, to draw less attention to himself, but when Neji looks into his eyes, and traces his gaze over the soft, pink lips he's grown intimately knowing of, it’s impossible to ignore. It’s impossible to feel not feel blinded.

 And then when he looks back, it’s impossible not to feel known. His eyes are capable of seeing too much, and when SHikamaru smiles sadly, they bend ever so slightly. “What you were given wasn’t what you deserved. Not a single fucking bit of it was something  you  deserved.”

 If it didn’t feel like an avalanch, Neji would have thought it was funny how easily Shikamaru could take him apart. He could do it at will, and he could break him just as swiftly, yet he never even tried.

 Except, of course, when it was to make him vulnerable -- like how he strips him down and turns him inside out just to see, to touch, but to never harm.

 Neji’s face must have been flushed, because the new tears streaking down his cheeks and onto Shikamaru’s hands felt like ice.

 “What adults do to children is never the kid’s fault. They’ll trick us into thinking it is, though, and we’ll just… believe.”

 And  that  was it. That was the corner stone of the avalanch, and it was removed so fast that all that came tumbling after was impossible to be avoid, to not be trampled by.

 “But that’s not even the part that’s bad. That’s not even  half  of it!” He’s not yelling, but he’s loud, and it’s like the ghost of the 12 year old he once knew took over his mind for a split second.  “And I might learn to feel deserving of this, and accepting of gentle thing, and it might take years but it’s  possible  to deserve. It’s  possible  to accept. All of  that is possible!”

 He’s lashing out, and its so bitter and rotten on his tongue when its said and done. His tears are hot and angry, and suddenly his breath is pent and he’s dizzy from holding it in, after letting so much of it out.

 Shikamaru didn’t flinch though. His eyebrows are cast down, sad and furrowed, his eyes deep with contemplation and consideration and empathy, and his patience is present in the way he simply cradles Neji’s face.

 Seconds pass, and then those fade into long minutes. The wind picked up around them, carrying the scent of flowers and wet dirt from the distance. The moon is out, but so are the clouds, and the brightness of the moon comes and goes with the wind. 

 When it’s clear that Neji doesn’t have anything more to say, Shikamaru leans in and presses a sweet and simple kiss to Neji’s lips,. When they part Neji can see the wetness of his tears on Shikamaru, little glints under the night sky.

 “If that’s what  is  possible, then what  isn’t ?”

 Neji closed his eyes, and took in as steady a breath as he could. He had no more tears in him. All of it was replaced with heaviness and exhaustion. He wanted nothing more than to collapse, to sleep, and to stop thinking.

 He smiles, bitter and longing. “I might not be able to be as… gentle.”

 “What do you mean, like you might… hurt me?”

 “Not like that… not intentionally. My hands… they’re too rough.”

  I’m too rough .

 “I don’t think it works that way, Neji. It’s not a matter of  slipping up or being--”

 His voice was loud again -- not like a shout, but like words spoken in a temple “But that’s the thing, Shikamaru -- they can. They can react. I feel them guard, and go rigid, and become so fucking stiff that I’m worried I wont know what to do with them!”

 “I don’t think we’re talking about the same thing, because I know you’re not saying you’re going to hurt me. You’re not going to accidentally punch me, or tear me apart, or, I don’t know, Byakugan me or anything… and then again, even  if  you were to, I don’t think you’d get very far.”

 Neji smiles at that, because he’s probably right. 

 “It’s just like your hands  work … and mine dont. I don’t know how to touch like that.”

 “You already do, Neji.”

 “But it’s not just… it’s because I can’t  do  that. I’ve touched so many things that end up breaking, and it’s…

 “Scary?”

 Neji nods, averting his eyes when he notices the glint in Shikamaru’s.

 Shikamaru can always  hone  in, and it’s another reason to be frightened of this man, if he were worth being frightened of at all.  “It’s like what you said earlier, isn’t it? When you said the words  kind  and  gentle . You mean like that, don’t you?”

 There’s nothing physical about it, and Neji has to ceed to that undeniable truth once it’s stated, clear as day. “I think I might try and touch you like you touch me, and I’ll break you…”

 Shikamaru’s left thumb comes to trace Neji’s lips, callus to soft skin.“I could do the same, though, don’t you think?”

 Neji fidgets, shoulders dropping, tilting his head forward with his hair cascading in his wake. “Technically…”

 “No, I mean it,” and Shikamaru takes his left hand and uses it to push back the curtain of hair that started to form, to hold it back. “Don’t you think that one day it might be possible, and that I might break you?”

 “Shikamaru…”

 “I need you to answer that.”

 “Yes… yes it’s possible.”

 “Then do you trust me? Do you trust to be in my hands, in  my intentions? Do you trust me not to ‘break��� you?”

 “Yes. Yes, without question.”

 “Then I trust you too. I trust these hands,” and he drops both his own hands to hold Neji's between their bodies, with all the strength he has. “And I trust that they can handle me with care.”

 “What if they don’t?”

  What if the trust is misplaced? Failure isn’t an option, until it is...

 “Then I’ll forgive you.”

 It’s infuriating, it’s almost unbearable -- to meet every worry and cynicism he has with calmness and faith. “What if they slip? What if my best intentions still hurt you?”

 “Then I’ll still forgive you.”

 This time, Neji didn’t have anything else to say. There wasn’t another  what if  hanging on his tongue.

 So instead of sinking, he decided that if he couldn’t understand it all, or accept it all, then he was at least going to express it all.

 “I… also thought that this wouldn’t happen. When you said earlier, that you didn’t believe in love, I didn’t think I’d ever feel love either…”

 The word Shikamaru actually said was  romance  , but Neji knew better. He And it’s nice to see Shikamaru blush, to flounder this time, the way he always does when he gets  too  much attention. 

 “But...”

 “But I found it. And I feel it.”

 Shikamaru averts his eyes, skin pinkening even under the moonlight. “Stop, or else you’re gonna make me feel special...”

 This time, Neji leaned in, wanting to taste the vulnerability and swallow it all up. “Shikamaru,” he said, hot against his lips as they grazed each other.

 “I love you too,” he returned, his eyes looking up their clumsily entangled hands when Neji leaned in to kiss him.

 Shikamaru tumbled backwards with the weight of Neji, Neji’s momentum hitting suddenly and passionately all encompassing -- like warmth; and there’s no all consuming  fire when he pins his hands down to the cool grass. Nothing about this is about to burn out or turn all in its wake into char and ember, or broken pieces of glass. 

 Neji slotted himself between Shikamaru’s legs, and took his left hand to support himself over Shikamaru while the other stayed with his fingers intertwined.

 It’s consuming like oxygen -- like the first breath of fresh air during a storm, or the one right afte completing a mission and realising that despite it all, you survived.

  And the both of them smiled, like they knew this, and they tumbled into each and every gentle touch.

[vettelcore]

so what do you think about Mark Webber, Lewis Hamilton and Sebastian Vettel? :D

thank you for asking anon!! those are some good choices lol 

MARK WEBBER: all I can remember from him was from the years that he was teammates with Seb at redbull so you can imagine how much I liked him back then lol

but nah, I think he’s the typical solid midfield driver that can win a few races from now and then (*ehem* val *ehem), a good driver but definitely not championship material imo 

definitely not a good number two driver, but I think that was just for Seb since he had no problem helping Fernando out on Brazil 2012 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

nowadays i think he’s a nice guy, he realised that his rivalry with seb was stupid because the bad ones were always Christian and Helmut, not his teammate, although those were really fun days ngl i would have loved a netflix series to be a thing during those seasons lol

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LEWIS HAMILTON: hands down the best driver in F1 currently (im sorry seb but its the truth lol) he barely makes any mistakes, he’s fast, consistent and idk if anyone here has watched kuroko no basket??? but theres this thing in that anime where the REALLY good players got in the “zone” and they were practically unbeatable??? like out of this fucking world shit. Anyways when Lewis gets in his “zone” I bet he even gets the sparkly eyes with lasers coming out of them like they do in the anime lmfao 

I think the guy gets WAYYY too much shit because of his more personal side, like idk to me he just seems like an easy going person who just wants to be nice, hence the “you guys are the best crowd ever!” meme from a few seasons back lol

lewis has had so much shit thrown at him being the 1st and only black driver in f1, I remember when he was teammates with Fernando, during a GP in Catalonia, some “””fans””” dressed up in blackface, he was constantly called the n word equivalent in spanish by fernando’s fans, and afaik this racism wasnt only from non uk countries, like even in his home country he was still getting racist attacks bc he “wants to be from the hood” and shit like that, only because he likes to do other things outside of f1, it’s honestly insane

like idk i’ve always had a soft spot for lewis, i have never been his fan, but I can appreciate him as both a driver and a person

also my appreciation for him went up when he went vegan, and from a social issues pov, he’s probably one of the most decent guys in the paddock, even though he says a lot of dumb shit sometimes lol

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SEBASTIAN VETTEL: if I say he’s underrated, will anyone kill me?? but let me explain

he won his 1st race and pole on a rainy weekend in monza in a TORO ROSSO, people love to downplay this because “well to be honeeeeest the STR was a really good car in 2008 so it wasn’t that much of an achievement

he became a world champion on his 3rd full season in f1, becoming the youngest WDC in history, on a season where 5 different drivers could have won the title and it went down to the last race, people still love to downplay this bc “well to be honeeeeest only him and fernando could realistically win the championship and the ferrari was a horrible car”

he went on to destroy every other driver in 2011, obviously only thanks to newey

he beat fernando fair and square in 2012, again, obviously only thanks to newey and because the ferrari that season also was a really bad car

once again he went on to destroy every other driver in 2013, “thanks to the car”

4 championships in total, on a row, and beating drivers like Fernando Alonso who many consider even a better driver than Schumi

but no, he never deserved any of them because he won only because of the car, of fucking course

when he moved to ferrari, SO many people think he did it because he was “afraid of Ricciardo” and was only running away, and they all ignore the fact that

1. it was always seb’s dream to emulate what Schumi, his idol, did in Ferrari, his all time favourite team

2. he had a precontract since early in the season and he had been talking to ferrari for Y E A R S  before anything was made official

and now since he moved to Ferrari, he gets shit because “LoL vEtTeL bAd He SpInS”, I could go on a whole different rant over this lol 

Overall, I have NEVER seen a fucking four time world champion get as much shit as he does, be doubted as much as him, and be so fucking underrated as him, it’s fucking insane

like... I was gonna say “you’re only as good as you’re last race”, but I dont think that even applies to Seb because when he has a good race, so many people still say shit like “well duuuh, his team threw his teammate under the bus to let him win”

you dont fucking win 4 world championships if you’re not a fucking good driver, for fucks sake, how is that so difficult to understand??

on his personality, him and romain are the two sweetest and most caring drivers in the paddock lmfao 

hes the king of dad jokes and no one else can beat him at that you can’t change my mind

i also see so many comments on reddit saying that “they used to hate him back in redbull because he was so stuck up and a crybaby, but since he moved to ferrari he’s become such a funny guy” like??? no??? what the fuck???? he’s always been a really good and funny guy? did these people watch any of his interviews or press conferences back in 2010-2014? what??? how the hell do you think he’s the only driver to have had befriended kimi lmfao like just say that your bias against him made you not see how fucking funny he is, it’s fine

at the end of the day, no matter what seb does he is doomed

if he wins, it’s because of the car

if he loses, it’s because he’s a shit driver

if he moves teams, he’s just running away from his teammates

if he breathes, he’s wasting people’s oxygen 

if he doesn’t breath, he’s a dumb idiot because he’s gonna die

also he cares so much about his team and the sport, is super down to earth and will jump to any journalist’s throat if they ask something inappropriate to other drivers or to himself

I just fucking love sebastian so much why am i like this dhldsjhdkjghdfg 

oh my god this post is so long sdhflsdhfsjk 

[tumblunni]

Randomly thinking about a yokai watch and lobotomy corporation crossover au because honestly both games have an equal mix of scary and silly monsters and the difference is just in the tone. I could easily imagine a lot of Yokai making sense as Abnormalities and some of them already kinda have minigames of doing weird overspecific stuff to keep youself safe from them. And thr whole Infinate Tunnel/Moody Mary questline is so effing surreal its like an Abnormality! Plus there's lots of Abnormalities that are sympathetic and itd be cool to reimagine a version of them that can be befriended and helped.

Tho i dunno, maybe this concept is just too similar to Shadowside? But also with like..un-shadowsiding the Abnormalities. A two way horror and cuteness swap~!

Random place to start: Dr Maddiman! As an abnormality he'd be similar to Nothing There, a mimic type. But instead of trying to mimic people on purpose to escape, he seems to genuibely believe he is an ordinary employee and has to get back to his very important science work. And in this au he'd probably look lots more terrifying and inhuman and such, so his delusion is very clearly false. Theres no chance of anyone actually falling for his mimicry, he never stops looking like a horrifying monstrosity squeezed into a labcoat no matter how much he begs for you to believe he's human.

Containment procedures for him involve validating his delusion so he doesnt attack you- treating him like a valued employee and pretending to involve him in important work even if you're just having him staple together blank papers all day. Whenever he breaches containment he just goes around doing paperwork like that and copying other stuff he sees humans doing. Or he latches onto an employee and annoys them by following them around and babbling cute anecdotes about his beloved wife and kids. Research has been able to track down the locations he describes as his childhood home and where he got married, but can find no proof that he was ever human or that his family ever existed.

Despite his sympathetic nature and good instentions, the doctor is still a very dangerous Abnormality. He's usually harmless when breaching and even protects employees from other abnormalities but his desire to protect others can be also his biggest danger. You cant under any circumstances let him know if you're sick or injured, his well-intentioned attempts to help often end in completely remodelling the human body into a more efficient form. Several abnormalities around the facility were once people who encountered this one and found their wishes answered in the worst of ways. The doctor speaks fondly of his past patients and seems convinced they must be much happier now. If he's ever placed close to their cell and they breach containment at the same time, the patient will ignore all humans and attack the doctor constantly. And the doctor usually stops attacking at all and just stares into space as he's torn apart. Every time his twisted body reforms and he finds he's been denied death again, he seems to quickly forget what happened as a form of coping mechanism.

He cant stand the thought of knowing he's been hurting people, and even when he briefly remembers sometimes he still cant stop himself from doing it. His chance of breaching increases the longer he goes without 'helping' someone, and a third eye opens on his forehead and dominates more and more of his face. His potential positive effects are the same as his negative ones, his 'helpful' surgery is a random roulette so sometimes it genuinely is helpful. No matter what youre gonna end up mutated, but if youre lucky you'll just be twisted up inside into a stronger faster creature and still look outwardly human. Effects can include simple level ups in skills, increased elememtal resistance, growing a random abnormality's E.G.O gift from your flesh, randomizing an appearance trait like face or hair colour, and various temporary buffs. A negative result will turn the employee into an -02 type abnormality of the same genus, a massive tumourous blob of multiple arms that seems to leak sunlight out of its eyes and mouth. The doctor expresses fondness towards these creatures and will seem to mistake them for the children he believes he once had, whispering gently that he missed them so much even as they try and take their revenge by tearing him limb from limb. Once placed into a separate containment unit (for the sake of the doctor's safety as much as the employees), these creatures will settle into a hibernating state and eventually emerge from their coccoon of terrifying limbs as a random Abnormality you havent already seen yet. Once the process is completed they seem to have no memory left of being human, and will replace their previous AI with that of the resulting Abnormality. If they meet the doctor in future breaches they seem to not recognise him, but he always calls them his child no matter how different they look. He seems to see their abandoned aggression as a sign that the surgery was successful and he saved them from the tragedy of being human. Energy output increases for the rest of the day due to happiness!

The rarest result of the random surgery is a small chance that the employee will seem otherwise unchanged but suddenly start seeing the doctor as their father figure. They'll know details about his false fantasy of a normal human life, even if he never told them. And their personality begins to change to that of once of the nonexistant children, remembering dear moments with their dad that really never existed. Aside from loss of self and being distracted from productive work, there are no dangerous effects from this. They will just perform better at work with the doctor and have a small chance of experiencing family actions at the end of each work session. Varying from tea parties to stereotypical 'its not a phase dad, punk rock is my life!' conversations. It seems the 'children' have very different personalities...? The possessed employee will receive a glowing heart on their chest (in various colours depending on the "child") and its possible to free them by shattering this heart, however theyre insanely protective of it. A possible theory is that the doctor was indeed a human once, and is merely the conduit for a cluster of otherworldly forces that he perceives as 'cute children', who are using him to help find new host bodies. The higher ups are currently considering passing a bill to allow sacrifices to see what happens if the possession is ever completed. (Doctor is very hsppy about this!! He loves his kids!!)

[iminlovewith-rogers-car]

Don’t tell Roger (Maylor fic)

PART 1/?

AO3  -  PART 2  -   PART 3   -  PART 4

CHAPTER 1: “LOCK THE DOOR”

HELLO GUYS, SO FOR SOME REASON IT SEEMS LIKE TUMBLR DELETED THE POST OF THE FIRST CHAPTER SO NOW IM JUST UPLOADING IT AGAIN :)

The guys are all at a rehearsal, Roger is playing the drums in the back, with Freddie, John, and Brian in the front of the room... Roger is playing as good as he can, considering he's getting somewhat distracted by staring at Bri's broad sexy back, eventually he forgets about what he’s doing, too focused on his friend's body, and stops playing for a second, this causes his friends to look over their shoulders and give him a confused look.

“Oh fuck! I’m sorry, I… I mean I got distracted hehe I’m sorry” he snaps back into reality as his cheeks turn red from embarrassment. Since it’s been a bit of a stressful day he expects some eye rolling from his friends but instead they just scoff softly and smile.

“Its okay darling, we'll just take a break, if everyone agrees, I’m guessing we're all a bit tired” Freddie says, he’s clearly exhausted from singing all day and his throat must be sore.

Brian goes to put his red special on it’s case aa John approaches Rog “You okay mate? You seem off” John asked softly and in a very low voice, so Roger can feel free to discuss whatever it is that's wrong. “Oh no I’m fine, just tired that’s all, I’m sorry for messing up” Rog replies with a soft smile, trying to get the attention away from his behavior and on his little mistake, he hasn’t told anyone about his newly aknowldeged crush on Brian; he’s usually not one to get all shy and hide his true emotions about anything, and it’s been clear by the way he ocationally throws some massive tantrums, going as far as trashing his drum set on more than one ocation... but this is different, they’re all best friends and he doesn’t know how John or Fred would react if he told them about him fancying Bri, it would just be weird, or so he thinks. He knows they wouldn’t mind about him being gay ("gay? Maybe bi, I mean I still find girls quite attractive" he thinks to himself) since they’re all very supportive of Freddie and had never judged him or acted any different around him. But God, this is Brian we're talking about, if it was any other guy he’d probably just tell them (but honestly if this was any other guy Roger wouldn’t even like him, he’s never really been attracted to any other men)

This is weird for Roger in more than one way, since he’s usually the one being chased after, people get hopeless crushes on him, and it’s not very often that Roger finds himself nervous around someone, changing his clothes entirely a couple times before leaving the house, and fixing his outfit each time he sees a mirror, fixing his eyebrows with his finger and biting his lips nervously, so much they turn red, before meeting the person he likes. For him it’s usually more simple than that, he finds someone he likes and after some talking and flirting the other person is all heads over heels for him.

He’s always been a confident guy and he’s well aware of what he looks like, and on top of that he knows exactly how to seduce someone; but when he’s around Brian he... He just gets a little nervous.

“Hey dearies, how would you like some beer? I think we could all use a fun night out after all this work” Freddie says overly excited, the rest of the guys know when Freddie’s feeling like partying, there’s no point in arguing against joining him, Fred will always convince them all (and to be perfectly honest, they all end up having a great time)

Roger and John are up for it as soon as Fred suggests it but Brian is a bit reluctant

“I don’t know, I’m really tired, we’ve been practicing for hours Fred, it baffles me how you all are not as exhausted as I am”

“Oh come on love, I’ll pay for the first round” Freddie says winking

“Let's go, we'll have fun, come on" John added, clearly excited to go out with his best friends.

“Come on Bri, let’s go!” Roger insisted giving Brian the sweetest smile he could manage to put on

“Oh okay okay, since you’re all insisting, how can I refuse?” Brian finally agreed with a charming smile to join his friends; but to be absolutely honest, what he actually means is he can’t say no to Roger’s big blue eyes and innocent smile, how could he? Rog is just too cute.

~~~~

They get to their favorite pub, they haven’t been there in a couple months, but they sure had missed it, it’s a nice place, reasonable prices and cute girls (and boys) and it’s big enough to have some privacy when they’re talking about their affairs as well, the beer there is always cold and the food is always good.

It’s quite big for a pub, but it’s really nice, it used to be a house, the walls are tall and covered on a layer of nicely arranged bricks for decoration, it also has many plants attached to the walls, and it has a very appropriate warm orangey lighting, in some areas of the first floor there’s no roof, it was probably some sort of patio back when it was a house. The boys get to their usual table and sit in those comfortable padded chairs. Roger and Freddie light up a cigarette as soon as they sit down. “Oh hello dear” Fred says to their cute waitress, she’s usually the one who serves them and there’s some sense of closeness with her but they aren’t really friends yet, she’s a bit shy and the boys are usually too hyped to have a decent conversation with her “may I ask you for four big, cold, delicious beers and some chips please?”

“Sure thing! Be right back with your order” she replied while winking at Roger, she’s always been flirty with the four of them but haven’t really approached them in a way other that their cheerful, nice waitress.

“Someone seems to fancy you!” John teases Roger while lighting his own cigarette

“Oh hahaha yeah, maybe I wouldn’t know for sure” Roger mumbles absent mindedly while fixing his hair and holding his cigarette between his lips

“What’s wrong?” Brian asked genuinely concerned, since this isn’t a usual response for Roger, Brian knows his friend and knows Rog would usually say something cheeky or playfully cocky and then just let it slide

“Hu?, What do you mean Bri?”

“Well you seem somewhat distracted mate”

“No no I’m fine just a bit uhm…”

“Your beer, boys! Enjoy!” the waitress inadvertently interrupted

“Thank you Rose” John answered

Freddie was the first to grab his drink “Cheers! To you my darlings! And to a lovely evening of getting terribly shitfaced!”

“Cheers!” the boys replied giggling

~~~~

Four rounds later, Roger is drunk, John is missing, Freddie is still standing and Bri is almost too sober for his friends dumb behaviour.

“Drink up my darling, maybe you’ll find some cute girl who will take you home tonight” Freddie said as he forced Brian’s glass against his lips.

“Ye know, I haven’t had a girl over in months” Roger said, he gets a bit impertinent when he’s drunk “I’d like someone to bring me home tonight too” he stood up stumbling a little bit “I’mma go to the… the.. I’mma go take a leak” he said giggling and left

“I’m sorry but did Roger just say he has not shagged in months?” Freddie whispered to Brian

“I have some difficulty believing that as well, Fred” Brian laughed and chugged down his beer

~~~~

“Where the fuck are Deaky and Roger?” Freddie asked Brian, they’re both drunk by now

“Oh right! Where are those two? Should we look for them?”

“Uhm… maybe they left dear, I don’t know, Roger said he was going to the bathroom 45 minutes ago”

“Yeah, but I don't know, I’ll go look for them in the bathroom just in case” Brian said giggling, he gets all relaxed and giggly when he’s drunk, but he still worries for his two younger friends, specially for Roger, he gets way to irresponsible when he drinks and has the dumbest unsafest ideas, he'd endanger his own life for the sake of fun, John on the other hand seems to be able to take care of himself, but Brian still prefers to look after him too.

Brian got to the bathroom on the second floor and knocked, there was no response and it was unlocked so he just opened the door in case one of his drunk friends was inside

“Hello? Is someone in there?” There was no response but he heard some noises “okay I’m coming in, is that good?” he continued hesitantly, even if it's not Roger or Deaky, maybe theres someone in there that could use some help

“Oh fuck! Roger lock the door for the love of God!” he laughed and closed the wooden door after getting a glimpse of Roger getting a blow job from a brunette.

“Oh no no no no no fucking hell no” Roger said and buckled his pants, he figured the best way to get your crush to like you is not by letting them see such a thing “hey I’m so sorry I have to go! Nice meeting you!” he said to the girl as he rushed out of the bathroom and down the stairs where he found Brian “hey Bri hey hey wait Bri” Brian turned around “what? So quickly?” Brian responded with a cheeky smile “hu? Oh! No no I mean I’m sorry I don’t mean for you or anyone to see that I mean it’s meaningless and” Roger mumbled as fast as he could “oh Rog don’t worry, I’ve seen you do way worse” And by these words Roger remembered that Brian and him are not dating and that they’re in fact best friends, best straight friends. Best friends who have girls over from time to time and that’s fine. “I’m just a bit jealous” Brian continued

“Jealous” Roger blushed and tried to make sense out of that, is Brian jealous? Of the girl? Or? What?? Brian likes him?

“Of course! I’d like to get lucky too!” Brian replied while placing his arm around Roger’s neck to go downstairs together.

Brian hated to admit it to himself but, what he saw a few minutes ago was actually a delightful sight, he tried to shake the thought out of his head... But Roger’s lips parted while he moaned softly with that delicious voice of his, his head resting back on the wall and his eyebrows slightly furrowed in pleasure was all to hot to ignore, but those thoughts have absolutely no reason to be in his mind, he's his friend and Brian is only thinking those things because he’s drunk, right?... Wrong, Brian tried to convince himself of that but truth is he really likes Roger, he likes likes Roger, at first he just thought he was just feeling a lot of affection for his best friend but he couldn’t help but stare at Roger all the time, his enormous eyes, his arms getting stronger and stronger from playing the drums, his skinny and hot abdomen showing from those tiny shirts, his long bleached hair, his collarbone and how much he would like to softly bite on it. Yes, Roger turned him on, but he also cared for him in a very special way, it wasn’t just arousal he felt but maybe… something else. And yes, he was somewhat jealous when he saw Roger with that girl but he was in no position to say anything about it, and in any case, the image was quite nice anyways.

They went downstairs and there was Deaky, Sitting at the table with Freddie, both still drunk

“Ah! Here you are! Did you get lost on your way to the bathroom? Or was something more exciting going on?” Freddie said cheerfully, he knows Roger very well and he has himself got those glimpses of Roger in the bathroom with some girl before.

“Im a gentleman Fred, I don’t kiss and tell!” Roger accepted something else was going on “but if you must know, the strake remains the same, months”

“Oh really? Then what was that I saw? Was she looking for something lost in your penis? Brian joked

“Oh you know what I mean! If it’s not actual sex it doesn’t count!” Roger hissed “you just tease me cause, as you admitted, you’re jealous!” he smirked.

“Oh Brian, I know you’d love to blow Rog but that’s no reason to interrupt him when he’s getting lucky” Freddie teased

John choked on his beer and looked at Brian with wide eyes, too shocked by this comment to remind himself it's just a joke.

“Uhm” Brian replied as his cheeks turned crimson red “thats… that’s not what I meant Fred”

“Oh I know love I’m just messing with you”

Roger sat there in silence, blushing significantly, if it wasn’t for his massive crush he’d just laugh and blow kisses at Brian but in this particular situation, he felt a bit embarrassed.

~~~~

The night went by and the boys had a lot of fun, they drank and ate, laughed all night till their tummies hurt, but it was time to go home, and Roger offered Freddie a ride.

Rog had tried to sober down because he doesn’t want to drive while he’s drunk and scratch his car or something, but more importantly because he wanted to talk to Freddie.

“Get in the car Fred! Come on at least try…” Roger said as he tried to help his intoxicated friend get on the passenger seat

“Sorry darling! Almost there!”

They both got in the car, finally, and Roger's started driving.

“hey Freddie, there’s something I want to ask you…” Roger was interrupted by Freddie blasting the radio and singing very loudly

“Hey I really want to ask you about…” Roger continued, screaming this time, but was once again interrupted by Freddie’s singing

“Fred!” he tried once more but Freddie was just ignoring him

“Oh come on… I’m trying to talk to you goddammit!” Roger really wanted to have this conversation “Freddie! Oh fuck this…!” he hissed in annoyance as he turned off the radio

“Hey! I was singing!” Freddie hissed back “Yeah no shit, I’m trying to talk to you” Roger wasn't gonna let Freddie get out of this one that easily “What is it?” Freddie finally replied

“Well… a while ago when we were at the…”

“Hey stop here at the store! I want to buy some cookies” Freddie interrupted him once more. To be fair this was unusual, when he’s sober Freddie would never even think of ignoring a friend’s question, he would always listen carefully to what his friends had to say but right now he was shitfaced

“Fred… it’s 3:30 in the morning… the bloody store is fucking closed”

“Oh that’s not fair” Freddie said and closed his eyes

~~~~

“Freddie, were here” Roger poked Freddie’s cheek “Fred wake up, come on buddy, you’re home”

“What? Oh!... Wonderful love”

Roger helped Freddie get to his flat and then to his bed

“Hey Freddie, wake up for the love of God I need to ask you something”

“Ask away dear!” Freddie shouted

“Shhh!... Okay, uhm, I... I mean maybe it was nothing, right? But uhm... It’s not a big deal, really, just… What did you mean before when you said Brian was jealous about you know uhm, you know”

“About Brian wanting to blow ya'?” Freddie interrupted, thank God, Roger didn't want to say it out loud himself

“Yes” Roger blushed “that”

“Nothing new darling” Freddie said as he dozed off again

“Fred! Fucking wake up!"

Freddie opened his big brown eyes trying to focus on Rog

“What do you mean nothing new?” Roger insisted

“Well you know, Brian thinks Roger is pretty and hot and funny, he told me, but don’t tell Roger okay? Brian will certainly kill me”

“Hu? Freddie? Elaborate” Roger insisted, was Freddie really drunk enough to not recognize who he's talking to?

“Don’t tell Roger dear, shhhh!” Freddie said placing his finger on Roger’s lips “promise?”

“Sure, I wont, goodnight Freddie”

[sparklyicecube]

He’d be proud

This is my secret santa present for @maidenofbagend for the Harry Potter Secret Santa! It’s a prongsfoot fanfic that I hope you will enjoy!

“Why must this happen to meeeeeeeeee.”

“Well well, I never thought I’d see you on the bed contemplating life, if I might guess, wondering why you like a certain deer?”

Sirius threw a pillow at the person.

“Shut up Remus. I don’t have a crush on any deer, and it’s a stag not a deer.”

Remus smirked while Sirius’s eyes widened in realisation of his mistake and buried his face in his pillow.

“Oh come on, what is it this time?” Prodded Remus.

“You know, James has done so much for me, taking me in on holidays, pranking with me, being so kind and helpful…” Sirius trailed off.

“I wouldn’t be so quick to give him those last two compliments if I were you.”

“I just,” Sirius sighed, “I want to get him something nice for christmas.”

Remus laughed, it wasn’t often that Sirius let down his cool, smug-like demeanor to show weakness like this, and the fact that this was for his best friend made it even better.

“If it’s just about that I’m sure you can find something great. Remember, it has to come from the heart.” Reminded Remus.

The door flew open as James dramatically walked in, Remus rolled his eyes and Sirius laughed.

“I’m so sorry my dear Sirius but I do quite need Remus for as long as this activity takes.” Declared James.

Remus and Sirius looked at each other, Remus shrugged and got up from where he was sitting on the bed to follow James.

Sirius kept up his cool smirk until the door closed then threw the blankets over himself in an attempt to figure out how to cool his face down.

James on the other hand was in a similar situation, except he now had a reluctant ear for him to talk to.

“Remus I called him ‘dear’!” Wailed James as soon as he stepped out of earshot. Remus wondered why his two best friends were like this. “Remus, I need to get him the best present ever! But I don’t think he even really wants anything!”

Remus sat in a comfy chair in the Gryffindor common with his book that he managed to grab, James spread out on a couch, it was practically midnight and they could talk well without any peepers, as far as they cared at least.

“Remuuuuuuus.” James whined, “What do I get him for christmas?”

Remus’s eye twitched but he didn’t snap.

“I don’t know, why don’t you wrap yourself up in a bow and give him that?” Hinted Remus.

“Best friend status doesn’t carry that far.” James complained. Remus sighed, these two were going to need a lot of pushing to get an inch past ‘best friend status’.

He went back to reading his book before another whine came from the couch.

“Remus, I know me and Sirius are close, and I know I’m irresistible, and you’re helping me but… I think he has a crush on you.”

Remus froze and put his book down, James didn’t know all the nights that Sirius spent ranting about James’s messy hair, dorky glasses, the infuriating dance between him and James that kept them always within arms length, never more never less. However, James had a point, for someone who never knew what was said, who just knew the hours and that Sirius was dying to talk to Remus for some reason, it was quite likely that it could be true. But not in this case.

“Look, I think we both know that’s not true, and even if it were, that wouldn’t stop you from getting him a magnificent christmas present or be stressed about it, so let’s work on one thing at a time okay? Come on, let’s go to bed.”

“You haven’t done your transfiguration homework?” Asked James as he caught sight of Peter’s frantic writing.

“What’s another word for ‘this shows’?” Asked a very stressed Peter.

“Try using ‘this highlights’.” Suggested Remus, taking a bite of the very delicious-looking sandwich.

The four were sitting at the dining table, eating their breakfast and doing their homework and…

“Hey Padfoot, no matter how much you stare at my muffin I’m not giving it to you.” Teased James.

Sirius snapped out of his trance-like state, from staring not at the muffin but at a certain someone Remus observed. He quickly bounced back.

“That muffin? I was just wondering how you never get sick of the same muffin everyday, really, you’re going to turn into a muffin one day!”

“Hah!” Exclaimed James. “You’re saying that but in reality you think my muffin is awesome!” The two burst into laughter.

James leaned over to peep at what Peter was writing.

“Um, I don’t think Minnie wants an essay on changing pizzas into muffins…” Commented James.

“I can’t stand it! I can’t write this! I need food!” He cried.

“I can’t wait until the holidays!” James said, ignoring Peter shovelling food into his mouth. “You guys could come over!” Realised James perking up.

“As much as I’d like to, my mom would freak if I don’t go home.” Answered Sirius with a slightly downed tone.

“Then… send me an owl when you convince her, we could meet up a week before school maybe?”

“Remember, she infiltrates all the owls.” Pointed out Sirius semi-dejectedly.

At that point the bell rang and sent the four scrambling for their books and equipment and imminent doom.

“Cleaning the trophy room is boring.” Declared James.

“Yes but we were 10 minutes late to class.” Pointed out Remus.

“Why did Professor have to split up me and Sirius?” Protested James as he attempted to wipe off the dust on a glass cabinet.

“She had a point, as long as you two were together there’d be no way the detention would be properly carried out.” Remus pointed out.

“Well in that case… Remus I still have no idea what to get him for christmas!!!” James complained, “And not much time to get it!”

“Why not a mirror, so you can feed his big ego?” Suggested Remus.

“A mirror is boring… “

“A phone?”

“What’s a phone…”

“It’s something muggles use to communicate with each other.”

“But that’s a muggle thing…” James’s eyes suddenly lit up, as if struck by a lightning bolt of inspiration. “You’re brilliant Remus! If I get him a mirror that we can use to communicate then there’s no way his mom can take it from him right? All I have to do is make it so that the mirror reflects what the other mirror should be reflecting! And audio of course… You’re a genius!”

“Well when am I not?”

Would a genius push their two best friends, who clearly want to get together, off a cliff? Yes, yes they would. Should he? Yes, yes he should. Can he? No, unfortunately there are not enough cliffs in Hogwarts that are convenient to push people off, and there aren’t any books in Azkaban. Would a genius push together, not just anyone, but Sirius Black and James Potter? The two biggest idiots and pranksters on the planet? No. Definitely not. But he shall do it anyway.

A slight trip and push landed Sirius a spot in James’s arms. It didn't end there though, nothing the marauders did ended at just that, no, James caught him like a fairy tale and spun him around. ‘Where did the rose in James’s mouth come from?’ Questioned Remus in his head. They threw their heads up in a flourish and ended on a showy pose. James looked down for a split second only the other marauders could see from their front row seats and proceeded to drop his best friend on the floor of the great hall, for now their fellow students can go back eating their dinner in peace.

James blinked in surprise then profusely apologised. Sirius made a big show of spinning his head around dizzily.

“Remus, I think I have a headache, take me to Madame Pomfrey.” Sirius then grabbed onto Remus’s hand and pulled him along out of the hall.

“What are you-”

“Remus I can't take it…” Sirius sighed. “Not that close, not that intimate just not that, you know?” Sirius looked at Remus for confirmation, a longing in his eyes.

“Then tell him already for goodness sake! It’s not my place to confess for you, you know?” Remus said.

“I would but…” Sirius looked away, “I don't think he'll say yes.”

“On what basis?” Remus asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Remus, it's so obvious, he likes you.” Sirius stated sorrowfully.

Remus thought back to the time where James basically begged him to help woo Sirius, the time that Remus had to listen to an hour of ranting about Sirius’s amazing comebacks and so on, these two were crazy similar yet surprisingly dense to no one but the other.

“Look Sirius, even if he does for some insane reason have a crush on me, I’d turn him down.” Remus deadpanned. Sirius stared at him.

“What?”

“Well yeah, I don't have any feelings for James and there is someone right beside me who’d be perfect for him.” Remus nudged him with his elbow playfully.

“Thanks.” The two started walking back to the great hall. “You know I’m thinking a scrapbook…”

As they ate dinner Remus thought of possible date ideas, library? They would never. Picnic? Not grand enough. Astronomy tower? Too cramped. Now Remus was starting to reconsider the idea of pushing the two off a cliff, maybe into the lake would be more feasible. Wait, this year they can finally go to Hogsmeade! And Remus knows for a fact that the two have the signatures ready so…

“So, The trip to Hogsmeade is coming up soon, where do you two want to go first?” Asked Remus.

“I don’t know, oh! They said that they have a joke shop! Let’s all go and get materials!” Exclaimed James.

“What about the Three Broomsticks? We can all go-” Started Sirius.

“Actually,” Remus cut in, swinging his arm onto Peter’s shoulder. “Me and Peter have plans for Hogsmeade.” Said Remus calmly.

“We do?” Asked Peter blankly.

“Remember? We have some christmas shopping to do, alone.” Emphasized Remus. James and Sirius shared a mildly suspicious look.

“Better get us amazing presents!” Teased Sirius.

James and Sirius walked into the Three Broomsticks in awe, Hogsmeade was truly magical, even to those who had grew up in it. They snagged a comfy little table, they saw some of their fellow students but when they looked like they might come over they seemed to change their minds. The two were good at keeping up appearances but on the inside both were freaking out, it was so obvious that this was meant to be a cute little date for the two but they had danced this ‘best friend’ dance for so long that it was hard to step out.

“So, how is life?” Asked Sirius in a joking way, putting his face to rest on top of his palm, propping himself up.

“Well,” Began James, mimicking Sirius’s pose. “How is the most handsome person in the world?” The pickup line had been set in place, ready for Sirius to ping-pong it back but…

“Amazing, thanks for asking.” Replied Sirius coolly, making a mental note to try and quell the butterflies in his stomach.

They both laughed for a bit before discussing about a bit of light quidditch then lapsing into awkward silence.

“So… Remus and Peter went christmas shopping huh?”

“Yeah… On that note, have you gotten my gift yet?”

James had a look of terror on his face before replying: “All done and wrapped in time for christmas.” He boasted gleefully. “What about you?”

“You really think you’d be done before me? I finished ages ago.” Sirius inwardly panicked, he had started the scrapbook but it was only half-done.

“That sure is convincing.” James pointed out before bursting into laughter with Sirius.

“Are you sure about this Remus?” Asked Peter. The two of them were under James’s very handy invisibility cloak, Remus was watching James and Sirius walk into the restaurant. Remus finally explained everything to Peter (who was legitimately

unaware of everything that was happening) and made sure their unofficial date was a success. He managed to hand all the other students notes saying to keep away from the two, and was monitoring them.

“Yes. Not really but if I don’t do this now I will have to live more of this nonsense before christmas official comes.”

“Is that their new strawberry cheesecake crumpet?!” Asked Peter, dashing out, pulling off their invisibility cloak off. It was quite dark so not many noticed it but Sirius saw him and immediately made a beeline for him, almost spilling with news. James also got up and started going towards him and Remus panicked.

Remus grabbed Sirius’s hand and with some quick maneuvering managed to get it in James’s, carrying with the momentum a twirl.

“Take Sirius, dance with him, kiss him and shut him up please.” Pleaded Remus.

James looked into Sirius’s grey eyes, Sirius into James’s hazel. The bulk of the restaurant was watching. The moment stretched out and instead of dropping Sirius like the incident before (he is never going to live that down) James pulled Sirius up to connect their lips.

The entire restaurant was clapping and hooting and many stood up to give a standing ovation. There were fireworks in the background and this was truly where the both of them belonged, in the middle of a crowd right next to each other.

James hefted Sirius to his feet and they both had huge arching smiles that haven’t been seen for forever. Remus joined them as they started towards the door.

“Did something happen?” Asked Peter, sprinting to catch up with them.

The Marauders laughed and headed back towards the big castle of Hogwarts.

“Come on.” Whined James. “Your parents won’t allow you to be away on christmas, neither will yours or yours or mine!” Gesturing to all the Marauders. “And I want to see your faces when you  open my presents!”

“He holds a valid point.” Noted Sirius.

“Just Marauder presents though, I am opening all of my other presents on christmas day itself.” Finalised Remus.

The other three nodded with so much enthusiasm that Remus couldn’t help to laugh.

They started opening their presents, shouting with glee.

“A mirror?” Said Sirius quizzically, then immediately started posing in front of it.

“Nope! That’s what you think but actually, you see in this mirror what you are supposed to be seeing in the other.” Explained James with pride.

“We can see each other even when my mother doesn’t want me to!” Squealed Sirius, grabbing James and pulling him into a kiss, which, has been a regular occurrence ever since that date.

“Open mine now.” Said Sirius with excitement, passing the parcel over.

“Is this a… scrapbook?” Asked James.

“Yep! I added as many photos as I could, especially the embarrassing ones!” They spent all night looking through the book, even when the Head Prefect told them that some people needed to sleep. The four of them went home that year with the biggest smiles ever and constantly laughing, two of them with a newfound relationship and happiness.

“I remember that, you gave me and James ‘portable fans’.”

“Yep, a very good decision if you ask me.”

“What was it you said? Oh yes. ‘The next time either of you say ‘I’m so hot’ there is a fan right there.’ Very sassy.”

The two looked wistfully out of Sirius’s window.

“Do you think Harry is going to have a christmas as good as that?”

“Well if Molly gets ahold of him I guarantee you he will, and as long as you are around I’m sure he will also be happy, Sirius.” Sirius smiled sadly.

“I miss him.”

“There isn’t a soul who doesn’t.”

“Death Eaters?”

“They don’t have souls.” The two laughed slightly, not nearly as full or as carefree as they were when they were thirteen but when you are both scarred, scared and in the middle of a war, that is good enough.

“Well I’ve got to go, Nymphadora is expecting me soon.”

“Doesn’t she hate people calling her that?”

“Your point?”

“James would be proud.” Remus gave Sirius a tired smile.

Sirius sat in his room, it was decorated with red and gold, quidditch posters and so on, yes. James would be proud.

[littlebabycrybtch]

ok ik bitches are still going to complain but i gotta rant to keep my shit together;;; ngl after being stuck co-raising two babies now i really feel genuinely Disgusted by unnecessary parent critique. like it actually makes me feel so viscerally upset and depressed when i remember nobody gets this or cares to and probably just wants to call out what im doing wrong, instead of lend me a hand to do it better. man im not treading lightly here the ‘no excuses’ mentality is literally Inhumane to parents and dehumanizes them as these superhumans, they arent, they are people trying to take care of themselves Plus One. there Are ‘excuses’ for not being perfect. just bc every child deserves perfect doesnt mean it can be given and that fucking SUCKS but that is one of the only times im comfortable saying; ‘thats just life’. you cant magically make life better for kids the way you think, you’re not a protector, you’re their Rock to teach them How to DEAL with what life brings, that means you’re allowed to struggle with it too. childcare is like this cosmic design to work you physically and mentally to the brink, fucking forget the normalization of how many people you think you’ve seen raise kids and done fine, it is harder than you can even fathom. they probably did not do fine behind closed doors. the parents with the best behaved and most obedient kids probably did harmful things to make them that way that will eventually come back to them, the parents with the happiest most well adjusted kids probably had the money to provide the extra care for that. there are ‘excuses’. idc if it fucking annoys you or w/e, i dont like being the bitch that says stuff nobody wants to hear, but you truly deeply cannot 100% understand unless you are raising kids, i dont say that to hurt your feewings or exclude you, i used to think that way, i say it bc when you see me passed out on the couch while my nephew gets into something dangerous, its because i got one hour of sleep that night while he kicked me in our bed for 4 hours. he cant help not knowing how that affects both of us, but i cant help being affected by it just cuz im supposed to be ~the big strong adult~, bc i am not a fucking xman. i CANT pretend it all away. while im sitting there napping im also waiting for my mental health meds to start working. im also dizzy from not eating. it sucks that he gets into shit sometimes. hes still gonna get into shit sometimes, and i can do my best, but if i sit here worrying that karens are gonna get pissed abt that and work myself even harder im gonna straight up explode. who does that help. who does me falling apart help. come babysit my kid for free if you wanna help me bitch!

parents are doing twice the work of a normal person while also teaching one of these people theyre caring for, how to BE a person. i used to be SO pro judging parents and im literally nauseated by the judgments now. “i cant believe this parent looked away and their kid got hurt, i cant beleive they just leave them there with a tablet or a snack or a toy while they nap, i cant believe they let them do that, i cant believe--” btich you literally have no idea how lucky you are that they are not both already dead. you are so lucky tehy are both alive and the parent isnt hospitalized for mental health or even physical exhaustion, or addicted to a stimulant (which includes caffeine), or using smth to relax like weed or alcohol (hello wine mom culture), or the kid isnt traumatized from watching their parent have repeatd breakdowns. that is literally better than most situations already. no matter how impossibly perfect the family could be in your mind, kids fuckin get hurt and they make mistakes and the PARENTS make mistakes bc theyre PEOPLE and yall this blows my mind that ppl dont realize this but,,,,, Little kids??? THEY DO NOT LISTEN TO THEIR PARENTS bc they essentially CANT..... for like YEARS there is a period they WILL NOT LISTEN TO YOU at ALL while they have the full autonomy and smarts and strength to cause horrible consequential problems, they are capable of learning how to circumnavigate your ‘babyproofing’ in new ways every single day, but they have ZEROOOOO MORALS OR CAUSE AND EFFECT SKILLS to understand RIGHT FROM WRONG, NO MATTER HOW OFTEN YOU TELL THEM!!!!! IT WONT CHANGE, ITS LITERALLY A PHYSICAL BRAIN THING THAT THEY CANT LEARN WHAT ‘NO’ MEANS FOR A WHILE YET!!! THIS CAN LAST FROM AGE 1 TO 4, SOMETIMES LONGER! THATS GENUINELY INSANITY INDUCING FOR THE ADULT WHOS KEEPING THEM IN LINE HUNDREDS OF TIMES A DAY, KNOWING ITS AMOUNTING TO ALMOST NOTHING UNTIL YEARS LATER!!!! IT DOESNT HELP WHEN PPL JUDGE YOU AND DONT BELEIVE YOU AND THINK YOU JUST ARENT ~TRYING HARD ENOUGH~! holy FUCK dude, idc if you wanna judge, im losing it bc i am being forced to keep my cool while a child whos pinching me and genuinely HURTING and BRUISING me laughs in my face bc he truly DOES NOT KNOW this, and there is NO WAY for me to convey it to make him stop at the moment!!!! thats maddening!!!

listen to me, neither of you dying or experiencing lasting damage is literally the goal every day, not just ‘raising them’, but that you both survive to the end of it. im appalled by how different the lifestyle is and the way ppl just... dont know that/REJECT that information so they get to judge. ofc tiny vulnerable innocent kids deserve the best, parents cannot always provide that if they want to Survive, bc they also deserve , basic understanding and humanity. you call out abuse all you want, theres a difference between the 'lesser of two evils’ choices, or even the genuinely Bad choices you can Accidentally make when at your wits end (which you should immediately correct anyways), and ever causing intentional physical or mental harm to the child, but the secodn yall start nitpicking or blatantly being ignorant to a struggle just so you get your blame validation in i literally cannot AFFORD to give you the time of day, im busy running on minutes of sleep, so if you think i have enough free time to entertain ur whining that my kids got a messy face and has been on his tablet in a highchair for an hour or w/e, idc, im using that time to shower for the first time in 2 weeks bc nobody else is gonna be there for me to let me do that shit :) so frankly put your money where your mouth is and help struggling parents whenever you can. i cant make shit better out of thin air.

“oh, but i dont have the money to help you.” YOU THINK IM AFFORDING CHILDCARE?? YOU CAN COME OVER AND HELP DIRECTLY WHILE I DO CHORES. “oh, but i dont wanna babysit for my friends, i dont like kids.” OH REALLY?????? OH YOU DONT LIKE KIDS??? BC THEYRE DIFFICULT MAYBE ??? SO MAYBE YOU SHOULDNT JUDGE WHEN ITS HARD THEN????? LIKE YOU RLY THINK JUST ‘LIKING THEM’ SUDDENLY MAKES IT EASY FOR ME?? YOU THINK ME FINDING MY NEPHEW CUTE AND LOVING HIM AND HIS LAUGHTER GIVES ME FUCKING SUPERMAN POWERS TO DEAL WITH THIS???????? “but You chose to have kids” rt in my case i literally didnt and would be homeless if not offering to help care for them but HEY COOL CONCEPT PRO CHOICE KINDA FUCKIN INCLUDES WHEN PEOPLE ‘CHOOSE’ TO HAVE KIDS EVEN WHEN THEY STRUGGLE AFTER, TOO LATE TO FUCKIN COMPLAIN NOW, JUST HELP A BITCH OUT. LIke... bro BRO b R O im losing it stop giving parents the inspiration porn treatment while disrespecting the actual struggles they go thru any time the child actually suffers bc they are unable to shield them from their struggle. can i be real, life literally will not go without struggle. you cannot raise them to have a life better than what the world is, you can do your best but you really cant MAKE it fair. once again this is not a ‘raise the perfect child’ contest you are just . trying to raise them at all. its messy. every single day you will have successes and failures, and you’ll be running on empty, and you’ll be doing that just to make it through to do it again tomorrow, while it slowly (AGONIZINGLY SLOWLY) gets easier each day. im tired of pretending lmao i dont wanna hear you bitches judge parents anymore, i dont wanna hear the stupid ass ‘im allowed to’ shit anymore dude!!!!! for gods sake i can agree with you when some shits just plain wrong but ill never apologize for standing up for myself or other struggling parents even if it makes you uncomfy, i can care about Both the child and the parent at the same time, ig i wont ask you why you seemingly cant. 😶 ESPECIALLY when things like classism and ableism tie in so often with these situations. not to mention racism like im white but hoooo if i hear one more story about a black parents ‘negligence’ in efforts of just trying to help their family, like leaving their kids somewhere during a job interview or w/e, vs the white parents that LET THEIR 10 YR OLDS WANDER AROUND MALLS BY THEMSELVES... im gonna scream. im gonna fuckin scream. its so unfair. fuck off, stop the spiteful ignorance, change this shitty hateful culture.

tldr; you Can care about kids while respecting parents, even when they arent perfect. you can advocate for children while also advocating for parents, and in fact, you should fucking try.

[sleepymayonaise]

Reasons I stopped watching Teenwolf that have nothing to do with Sterek

Its hard to get past the cringy feeling you get when someone disses a show for not making their ship cannon- I get that. And even when we get past the blantant queer bating, its hard to understand what 'problematic' really means when we're discussion a show on MTV. So here are just a few of the reasons so many people have given up on Jeff Davis and his creation. ■ Queer Bating Completely disregarding Sterek, this is a huge issue within the show. We'll start with Stiles. Throughout the show Stiles' sexuality is often joked about. In one episode he tells his father he's gay to get out of trouble, and in another, when the token gay character of the season offers to take his virginity, Stiles is flattered and actually considers it. On several occasions Jeff Davis has said that these points in the show have had the purpose of hinting at Stiles' Bisexuality. This should be a good thing, but despite the so-called "hints" we get, there is never a single instance of any kind of obvious and confirmed attraction between Stiles and another man. We can speculate and hope, but the show never gives into it outright. A person of course does not ever have to be in a relationship with someone of the same gender to identify as Bi, but when we're talking about representation on a major TV show, its important that at least some sort of 'proof' is shown. Maybe in the future we can have a bi character who never canonically dates someone of the same gender and still have it be representation, but we're not there yet. Rather than anything involving Stiles (a main character of the show) Jeff Davis oftwn substitutes queer representation with relatively unimportant side characters. Moreover the show has been know to make the main token poc and queer person the same person on the show. Danny, for instance, had no real plot importance as a character except for being gay and not white. The show advertises a diverse lgbt cast, but like most shows, does not deliver. ■ The strong female charachter The strong female character does not exist on this show. In fact every instance of a "strong" female has been used as a romantic interest in the plot, whose sole purpose is to give their male counterpart something to fight for, idolize, and have sex with. We'll start with Allison. Allison was a kick ass, arrow shooting, rebellious teenage girl. Unfortunately, she was also the love interest of the main character. Given that her family presented issues for the main character, she became the juliet in a cliche Shakespearean situation. But a girl can still be badass with a boyfriend right? Of course! However, as badass as Allison may have been, her character was used consistently as a romantic interest or problem and nothing else. She was Scott's girlfriend, and then Matt's love interest, and then Jackson's love interest, and then Issacs girlfriend, and then she was dead. A girl can be in a relationship on a show, sure, but when her character is only ever used as a love interest to serve the plot, it becomes demeaning and disheartening. Next, Lydia. With Lydia we find are biggest issues. Lydia Martin is an actual genius. She's beautiful and popular, funny when she wants to be, assertive when she needs to be, and her brain is a stunning work of art. But she also has flaws! She can be shallow and mean spirited, she's obsessed with her public image, and known to have fits of jealousy. She's a fantastically well rounded character that is utterly wasted the same way Allison is. Lydia spends half of her time on the show either suffering from severe mental issues (which we will address later) or hunting for a boyfriend. She's better off than Allison was as a character, but when it comes right down to it she's just another love interest to cause problems for the main male charachters. What's really unfortunate, is the stydia situation. There's nothing wrong with the ship, don't get me wrong, but there are some serious issues with its realization. Jeff Davis actually did a pretty cool thing when he made Stiles and Lydia just friends. He took a boy who was idolizing and sexualizing a girl that was uninterested, let him understand who she really was, and accept her into his life as a friend. Its so rare that we have an instance in the media of a straight boy and girl just remaining friends in the media, especially when their is initial interest from the male protag. It showed rejection from the female counterpart and acceptance from the male side and that's huge. Stydia of course ruins that by making a short appearance, and whats worse, especially for Stydia fans, is that the ship is short lived, and ends up only being used as bait for views. I don't need to go into kira, malia, and erica, because the same shit goes down with them. ■ Mental Health I'll make this part short, because theres so many issues with this particular aspect of the show, I cound go on for years. One of the biggest issues though, is eichen house, a psych facility that is consistently used to scare voews. This place grossly stereotypes non-neuro typicals as violent and unhinged. Another huge issue in the presentation of mental health on this show, is that the charachters are endlessly traumatized but never get resolution. PTSD and anxiety are practically used as quirky charachter flaws half of the time. ■ Derek Hale This is personally my biggest issue with the show. Derek Hale, like many of the characters (except for the main one of course) is very well rounded. He makes mistakes, he evolves as a person, he does his best. Its no wonder that he's so loved by the fandom. I personally stopped watching when Hoechlin left. He wasn't a deal breaker, but I was at my tipping point. The problem with Derek Hale starts with his tragic past, which involves him being seriously emotionally abused and the victim of statitory rape. His abuser then is used as a plot point. She terrorizes him and on occasion sexually assults him, and this is never addressed. Kate is made out to be a bad person, but when Derek is being sexually assaulted he's shirtless, hairless, and oiled up. Its filmed to be sexually enticing for the audience, which is seriously disgusting. Kate is basically a sexual predator that keeps being brought back to hurt Derek. Whats worse is that the emotional trauma that results from sexual assault is literally never addressed, and Derek is consistently used as a sex object. In another season, the big bad of the show is revealed to have been disguising itself as a woman named Jennifer Blake. Jennifer blake, aka the big bad, is used as Derek's love interest, and they have sex on multiple occasions. Its later revealed that Blake seduced Derek with magic. What the writers of this show don't appear to comprehend, is that if someone is coerced into sex they wouldn't otherwise have with supernatural means, that's rape. So Derek gets raped a couple more times, and its all hunkydory because the sex scenes were hot l, am I right Jeff? (Also, Questionable consent concerning sex appears on show way more than acceptable. In example, when Stiles loses his virginity, he's partially posessed by a demon, and the girl he has sex with isn't all there mentally either) Derek is consistently used and abused on this show. He is beaten down and taken from, manipulated, ridiculed, and oversexualized over and over. His entrance to the show involves the loss of his sister just a few short years after the loss of his entire family, which he is led to beleive was at his own hands. His rapist and abusers are never fully brought to justice, and the serious emotional damage inflicted on him is never addressed. Rather its ignored for the sake of continuing to use him a sexual object. Below are some sources to back the claims I've made in this post as well as articles that better articulate what I've tried to explain . If you have anything to add regarding the issues with the show, please feel free to add on. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.advocate.com/commentary/2014/09/17/op-ed-trouble-teen-wolf%3famp http://www.teen.com/2017/03/12/television/teen-television-shows-queerbaiting-gay-bait-audiences/#2 https://www.google.com/amp/amp.dailydot.com/upstream/teen-wolf-dead-female-characters-chart/ http://www.tv.com/news/teen-wolf-has-a-problem-regarding-female-characters-and-we-need-to-stop-ignoring-it-143956767458/ https://www.google.com/amp/s/ladygeekgirl.wordpress.com/2014/04/15/trigger-warning-kate-argent/amp/

[comicteaparty]

February 4th-February 10th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from February 4th, 2019 to February 10th, 2019.  The chat focused on Offshore Comic by Stefan Gasic.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Offshore Comic by Stefan Gasic~! (http://www.offshorecomic.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PST), so keep checking back for more! You have until February 10th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite strip in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 3. Given the comic’s focus on financial markets and all that composes them, what is something this comic has taught you about the subject? Alternatively, what is something you wished you understood better to understand the comic’s comedy?

QUESTION 4. How do you think the comic’s illustrative style and choices help the comedy of the comic? What is one moment where a particular design or image really stood out to you and helped the point the strip was trying to convey?

QUESTION 5. The comic features several recurring subjects like the legitimacy of IQ scores, LLCs, and more. Which of these recurring topics did you like the most? What about it caught your interest?

Stefan G

Hello everyone, 1) Just updated www.offshorecomic.com with a new strip. Check it out. 2) RebelVampire, are your questions intended for me or any new reader? Ciao, Stefan the creator of #Offshorecomic

snuffysam

They're intended for both (still working through the archive)!

keii4ii

Is there a way to get permalinks for individual strips, so I can come back to specific ones at a later time?

Stefan G

Thanks & okay, snuffysam keii4ii, unfortunately there’s no way to get permalinks for individual strips ... I coded the website myself as a side project and am not that good a coder

keii4ii

Oh man, I can relate to that... If I ever get rich, comic website coding and maintenance stuff is the first thing I'll hire someone to do for me

I do like how it loads and makes it easy to read through the archive, for what it's worth.

Stefan G

Thanks for the feedback ... and I totally, totally agree. One could spend a fortune for a coder to take care of all the fixings and stuff ... now I’m learning on the side whenever there’s time left over from work & family.

Stefan G

Answer to Q1 => readers have found the “happiness” strip the best. It’s also one of my favourite ones [succinct & clever & relatable] ...I truly don’t have a favourite strip, but the attached Reto & Urs -strips make me chuckle whenever I read them [I appreciate below-the-waist-humour and/or humour where people are really, really selfish].

lomcia (princess_lom)

1. The newest one is so funny

2. Trader

3. i dont work in office but i cant find nothing to improve that comic, i think the design of characters and humor is on really high lvl 12/10 for me

4. Style is perfect ffor that comic, i wouldnt change it

Stefan G

Answer to Q2 => at the moment my favourite character is the Economist. He’s a genuine IYI [intellectual-yet-idiot] ... which the world is full of and the finance industry in particular. The Economist is easy to write for because I’ve discovered a never ending source of humorous material called the daily financial newspaper ... please find attached also one of my favourite strips

Thank you, lomcia (princess_lom) for your feedback.

lomcia (princess_lom)

your welcome I hope i didnt misunderstood question 3 xD

Stefan G

I think you got everything just right

lomcia (princess_lom)

cool

Stefan G

Answer/comment to Q3 => I’ve spend my professional life in finance, hence, I know every nuance of the industry. However, for the layperson the finance industry [money, banking, insurance, etcetc...] is a big black box of unnecessary complication. My humble attempt with #Offshorecomic is to untangle this complexity and make money related topics more accessible/understandable to anyone ... using humour as my main tool. Finance is more stupid than you think; trust me

I’ll answer the rest tomorrow. Gotta go to now. is like in a totally different time zone and all that Thx again y’all !

RebelVampire

QUESTION 6. Which joke not related to finance did you enjoy the most? What about it made it stand out to you among all the others?

RebelVampire

1) i really enjoyed the life coaching strip about facing reality and lying to yourself. i just really enjoy the bluntness and simplicity by which the self-deception line is delivered. A+ comedy right. 2) i like p-bird because i consider him a much needed counter balance to many of the other characters. he at least has more feet planted in reality. 3) hedge funds. not that i understand them perfectly from the comic, but now theyre more than just a financial word i see tossed around. and despite the very negative absurdist humor regarding them, was still interesting to get some insight into what they actually involved. 4) i think the style overall really balances well with the comedy. a lot of the comedy is reliant on the dialogue, so keeping the illustrations clean, bold, and somewhat simple really helps direct attention to the words. i also really just enjoy the character designs cause every single one really hits that idiot or absurdist mark that needs to be hit. 5) actually i really liked the address of IQ scores. because literally these characters seem like the type whod wind up on r/iamverysmart and use their IQs to talk about how cool they are. so it was kind of nice to see some evidence for that with the subject. that and i always like seeing the concept of IQ being torn apart. 6) i actually liked a lot of the jokes that pertained to the academic sphere in regards to things like publishing and teaching. selfishly it most just stood out to me because academia is something im more familiar with in regards to its simultaneous setup of worthless class structures and cutthroat profs trying to further their careers.

Stefan G

Thank you, RebelVampire, for your thoughtful analysis & feedback I believe that the writing is the most important part in comics ... and the best humorous writing is often blunt & simple [you hit the nail on the head with that comment]. Furthermore, I intentionally designed the strip in a simplistic style in order to A) highlight the writing/gag, B) to save time and C) cuz simple drawings are funny I love to make fun of pompous, self righteous folks ... academics are thus some of my main targets [due to the same reasons I make fun of financial professionals].

Stefan G

Answer to Q4 => My childhood inspiration and spark for cartoons/drawing came from F.Ibanez [Clever & Smart] ... very funny yet simple style. Nowadays I enjoy Dilbert by Scott Adams or the political cartoons from cartoonist Jari Elsilä; also both of them are hilarious without wasting unnecessary lines. I believe a straightforward style highlights the writing and that’s what I’m trying to achieve. Moreover, I love to have backgrounds in my comics [to steer the reader to a particular thought or mood] but hate to draw them and/or dislike it when they clutter the cartoon ... I’m rather happy with a style that I’ve developed over time where I draw the background but reduce the opacity to 25 %. I think that works pretty nice

Stefan G

Answer to Q5 => My favourite themes are 1) anyone predicting the future, 2) mistaking luck for awesome skill and 3) incompetent yet pompous professionals ... there is so much hilarious material right there

Answer to Q6 => I often use the characters Reto und Urs for jokes/strips that are not necessarily financial because they are so endearingly stupid [well, mostly Urs is]. This one makes me chuckle

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. In what ways have any of the strips changed the way you think about life, finances, or any other topic covered in them? Alternatively, what have the strips portrayed that you wish more people knew?

RebelVampire

(the archive for the chat on Poco Adventures is now available https://comicteaparty.com/post/182650076295/january-28th-february-3rd-2019-ctp-archive)

RebelVampire

QUESTION 8. Of all the parodies and jabs at financial markets and life, which do you consider the most on the nose as far as its representation in the comic goes?

RebelVampire

7) the strips have made me realize in a way that this is another industry where basically theres lots of ridiculous junk going on in the background cause you can never remove human faults completely. cause when it comes to finance theres lots of advanced vocabulary and concepts being thrown around usually, so for someone untrained it can sound intimidating and hard to follow. i think these strips do a great job of humanizing things tho and showing that the concepts arent all that alien cause at the end they were created by humans and reflect the desires of humans in a way. 8) one of my faves that i think is totally on the nose is this one where the economist is telling p-bird about ppl on twitter debating him being ignorant. and that his facts and stuff will prevail but p-bird points out that wouldnt even work on the economist. and the economist goes home confused. i think this is way too true for what its like to argue on the internet and how facts and logic get infinitely buried for the sake of narrative.

Stefan G

Excellent analysis/comments, RebelVampire really constructive. The human element is everywhere and money is such an emotionally laden topic that it’s easy to get confused even without the unnecessary complicated vocabulary ...which is often misused even by so-called “professionals”. If my strip has helped you understand all of that and un-demonised the beast, you’ve made me a very happy man Yeah, the Twitter-Fact-Confusion strip is one of my more relatable strips ... I’ve given up on trying to change people’s minds with facts; if changing minds is possible, it can only be achieved through via emotions. It sounds more logical the other way around but that’s not how we work. Here’s a special academically oriented strip just for you, RebelVampire Enjoy

snuffysam

haven't been able to get all the way through the archive yet, but my answer to both #2 and #8 is the Regional Manager. I love all the characters, but there's something to be said for the simplicity of having a guy literally run around headless.

Stefan G

Thanks , snuffysam. I almost forgot about the regional manager. I have to bring him back to life; I also like him ... by the way, there are 308 strips in total.

Answer to Q7 => I can’t claim that any one strip has changed the way I think about life and/or other things ... however, I do believe that writing & drawing Offshore strips has reinforced in me some of the main ideas from my favourite author, Nassim Nicholas Taleb, who’s books have influenced me deeply [e.g. Black Swan, Antifragile, etc etc] ... luck versus skill, thinking about risk and stuff like that. I regularly come back to his books for inspiration and recommend his books & Twitter -feed. Here are two strips that highlight my point ...sort of

Answer to Q8 => wow tough question ... with 99 % of my strips I genuinely try to convey some message about basic human quirks and/or outright stupidities that actually take place on a regular basis when handling money + and then I add my own personal humours twist to it. Here are a few strips with the message never to buy something you don’t understand [a hint: they always have complicated names]...

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What other finance related topics are you hoping to see the comic explore? Which characters are you hoping to see involved with the topic?

Stefan G

Answer to Q9 => As the creator of the strip I’m obviously biased to answer this question, but I’d love to hear what the new readers have to say. I don’t have a particular preference for any topic [except make fun of pompous forecasters ] ... but I feel myself wanting to write & draw more strips for the Markets-Weasel and Reto und Urs. And that’s surprisingly hard to do; forcing it doesn’t work [at least not for me] ... Offshore’s main characters were supposed to be Reto und Urs and somehow P-Bird and the Economist and the trader stole the show. I guess that happens when you get to know your characters better. Funny how that happens ... here’s one nostalgic strip from my early work that I really enjoy

Stefan G

Addition to Q9 => ... I’ve steadily build up an audience on Twitter [@NonMeek] which consist mainly of likeminded financial and/or other professionals ...hence, hearing the viewpoints from anyone outside that sphere would be awesome

RebelVampire

QUESTION 10. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

RebelVampire

9) idk about specific topics, but id like to see the CEO who i think appeared in like one strip. I'm really interested to see the CEO dynamic with the other characters in terms of finance. learn how they view what theyre doing, how they view what the others are doing, etc. but im all for bringing the regional manager back too cause i enjoyed that character as well. a lot of great humor picking fun at how some managerial positions are kind of ridiculous to even exist to a degree. 10) learning more, mostly. overall its nice to see a harder to cover topic in comics. ive enjoyed how approachable and humanized the strips make finances, and how they remind you that professionals can be like this and actually have no clue what theyre doing. @Stefan G that academic oriented strip you shared was actually one of my faves. not necessarily in college, but i see this a lot in the blogosphere where ppl do a thing once and try to pass themselves as qualified experts to deliver advice. XD

Stefan G

@RebelVampire Thanks again for your opinions. Those really help with the development of the strip ... finance is a hard topic indeed and there are no really finance oriented strips out there [that I know of anyway], which is funny cuz the industry is filled with emotions and mind blowing mental errors. I guess people still believe finance & investing is some sort of scientific discipline which it’s really not ... there are hardly any black & white answers to anything even though there’s lots and lots of historical data ... it’s time to fix that myth with Offshore I’m glad you enjoyed that academic strip. It resonated rather well on Twitter too

@RebelVampire [adding to my previous answer] ... I agree that the managers need to be reanimated and given another chance. I’ll try to do that and see how they resonate. I never know beforehand which characters will work and which will fizzle out; e.g. der Compliance Offizier is one of my favourite characters, yet, resonates weakly outside the banking circles ‍♂️ [I love the strip below ].

keii4ii

I would like to see more strips that cracks jokes about this very specific context of finances! Things like that strip about funds blowing up on day 252. I think that gives this comic its own flavor. Readers get to laugh about not just any kind of incompetent people, but incompetent people in this specific field. Readers with no background in finances don't know the context, so more strips that shed light on the context of the jokes would be great.

Stefan G

@keii4ii All valid and excellent points ... I genuinely try to write & design my cartoons in such a way that the joke is understandable even though you don’t know the context. It’s a hard thing to do ... my wife is my toughest critic and she tells me the same as you ... but keep following Offshore and I promise to come up with more stuff like that 252 strip

Answer to Q10 => My ambition with Offshore is to 1) amuse myself first and see if anyone shares my sense of humour [if a cartoon doesn’t amuse me, I don’t publish it]. It’s a splendid way of letting out some frustration from work ... and 2) to make investing & finance more approachable to the layperson by infusing some humour into it in the form of cartoons ... which by the way nobody thought of doing on a serious basis. Weird. However, to produce material on a semi-regular basis I figured that writing only gags/jokes is too much work and/or too shallow of an approach, hence, the characters in the strip need to be interesting/relatable enough in order to create humorous material by mere interaction with each other. That’s easier said than done. I’m quite satisfied with my characters so far but am continuously looking for new interesting characters to add to the strip [either permanently or impermanently]. Like Scott Adams once told me: “The trick with comics is to reflect the reader's own experience. To allow people to say, "That's me!" I’ll conclude with this sneak peek strip [only for you guys] that should relate to the experience of anybody working in a big corporation.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Offshore Comic this week! Please also give a special thank you to Stefan Gasic for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Offshore Comic, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: http://www.offshorecomic.com/

Stefan’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/NonMeek

[losing-a-father]

Thoughts about growing up

Hey Dad, Just wanted to let out a few things on my mind, have no one else to talk about it with, so here it goes..

Growing up is hard. Even though parents tell you not to do things, you end up doing them anyways.. and I guess that’s normal. I hate doing things that you wouldn’t approve of, it makes me feel like I let you down, but please know that sometimes its tough to be me, and well I give in.

I feel like I am not growing up right, I am still a child deep down inside, and not in the cute way.. well maybe just a little cute lol. I haven’t had a single person love me or want to be in a relationship with me for about twenty years now, I have this feeling that I will never be good enough. I can’t even think about marriage when I don’t know how to show love, how to be in love.. it scares the fuck out of me. I never had experience with any of it, and I don’t think I am good at it either. For gods sake I still don’t know how to even talk about my feelings, confrontation is my nightmare. I don’t know how to be openly vulnerable, I don’t know how to trust anyone or have any confidence that someone might find me better, because of the way I see myself. I am tired of feeling lonely my entire life, watching others date people and find firsts and seconds, and thirds and I am still at 0. It hurts. Why can’t I be with someone.. theres something wrong. I feel like my person doesn’t exist.

Theres a secret though, that I have that no one else knows, it’s the reason I feel for all of this and one day I might have the courage to tell somebody. If it is true, and you are watching over me, well now you know it, and I am sorry.

In April I will be 22! Honestly, what? And every year passes and still I have this crippling loneliness that never seems to leave me.

I don’t know how to even plan my future, I am in this degree that I don’t fucking know where its taking me, I have no idea whatsoever what to do after graduation, and I don’t know who I’ll be with - my future is something I am not looking forward to. I have this hopelessness towards living, like I don’t mind dying young because I feel like nothing will change, 20s 30s I will still be the lonely alien I always was since I was five.

And since I don’t care anymore about my future I have been making mistakes on purpose, doing things that aren’t what I used to want, doing things that get me through the night. It’s all to distract myself from the emptiness I have.. pretty sad I know.

The problem with me is I go from a happy high to an empty low. My life has always been that way, I am either super happy and inlove with life or I hate it and want to kill myself. Throughout the year is a rollercoaster of alternating feelings about my existence and what it means. ignorance is truly a bliss, I wish I was one of those people that never thought twice about my existence.

There are a lot of things I have, that I am grateful for, things other people dream of having but I can’t enjoy them because of my mental state, my brain and its ongoing thoughts. It’s like you gave a person rivers and oceans when they can’t swim.

But after 22 years one must think, its not bad luck at this point, its something remotely wrong with me, and accepting that hurts me more than you can imagine.