#if there's one thing about me it's that i'm gonna write a muse who doesn't get any sleep!!!!!

[lord-squiggletits]

I need to reread the comics again to have specific arguments/evidence for this, but like

I feel a bit like I could've been sympathetic to the way other Cybertronian colonies view Cybertron, if it weren't for the fact that at least several of them (as in, ones that get notable dialogue/screen time) are so low-key self-righteous?

Like, idk... there's a lot of criticism of Cybertronians because they're so "warlike" and how their obsession with violence and vengeance is just dragging the whole galaxy down with them, but uh. The Autobot-Decepticon war was basically a product of societal ills bubbling over for like 6 million years beforehand and then finally boiling over into a 4 million year war that lasted as long as it did because the people involved had immense social/psychological trauma from being "raised" in an oppressive society.

So when the colonists come in being all 'omg you people are so violent and uncivilized why don't you just like, stop fighting' it kind of pissed me off a little bit as a reader/person like. Idk the colonists really came into this society of people full of massive amounts of trauma where even before the war society was super oppressive and no one has any experience of living "normal" lives unaffected by violence and bigotry. And the colonists were like "ummm wow why don't you guys just??? stop fighting???." Like idk it wasn't EVERY SINGLE MOMENT, in fact I think that when it was played for laughs it's quite a funny "fridge horror" type element. It was just annoying because like.... IDK???? It's just really annoying to watch a bunch of people who lived relatively sheltered lives on their own planets come to a different planet full of traumatized people and be like "omg why are you people so fucked up" IDK BRO MAYBE BECAUSE THEIR SOCIETY WAS OPPRESSIVE AND THEY LIVED THROUGH A LIFELONG WAR???

It also doesn't help that the colonies were literally founded based on imperialism and conquest so like, it's fucking rich to hear colonists scolding Cybertronians for their violence ruining the whole galaxy while literally sitting on planets that their Primes colonized from others. The hypocrisy of this is briefly mentioned in Unicron (literally the FINAL STORY OF THE SERIES) but like, that's basically the only time Cybertronian characters are given a reprieve of sympathy from other characters in universe and it's so tiresome.

I've talked to other people who didn't like the colonists and thought they basically (narratively speaking) existed just to shit on the existing characters, and it's actually really easy for me to sympathize with/outright agree with that assessment of the story considering how much of exRID/OP seems to be preoccupied with "Cybertron/the Primes/Optimus sucks" with very few reprieves for anything positive happening and even fewer chances for characters to get to explain themselves and experience a little bit of justice? Like, as the audience, it's just very frustrating to see the characters you spent hundreds of issues keeping up with get shit on by a bunch of "literally-who"s and then not really get a chance to ever defend themselves, either by literally defending themselves in conversation or having some sort of narrative thing happening that vindicates them at least symbolically

[wallcrawld]

𝐒𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐄

01. type of bed: twin bed - it's tiny but it does the job ( for the most part )

02. number of blankets: depends on the season, usually just one but when it gets super snowy and cold he'll use two for Comfort

03. number of pillows: usually three — one to hold, two to sleep on

04. type of clothing: very little HAHA usually just boxers and sometimes sweatpants if it's the colder months. he does sleep with the suit nearby in case he ever needs to quickly throw it on in an emergency situation.

05. does it matter where they sleep?: yes but also no but also sort of <3 HAHA peter's best sleep is obviously going to be in his own bed ( and saying best sleep is generous, considering none of his sleep is really good or frequent enough to be classified as 'best' ), but he'll crash on a couch or the floor or a chair. he really struggles to fall asleep unless he's absolutely reached his breaking point of exhaustion and at that point where he's passing out at doesn't really matter

06. what do they do if they cannot fall asleep?: goes on patrol. rationally, he knows it's probably not the best idea to put his life in danger when he's exhausted and can't sleep, but swinging helps clear his head and fighting crime is simple ( find bad guy, punch bad guy, profit ), far simpler than the racing thoughts keeping him up. he'll go until he physically can't any longer and his body succumbs to exhaustion.

07. frequent dreams, nightmares: nightmares almost every night without fail, it doesn't seem to matter how good his day was prior. peter's dreams are extremely vivid and, while dreaming, he struggles to ever identify his surroundings as being just a dream. this is worsened by the fact that he often feels the tingle of his spider sense reacting to his own fear or distraught reactions within the dreams.

08. deep slumber or naps: naps naps naps, peter doesn't really have the time for anything more than short bursts of sleep and it's a huge part of why he's constantly exhausted

09. when do they sleep: whenever he can. it's not uncommon for peter to be up for two, three, sometimes even four days straight. juggling a personal life, work/school, and spider-man stuff doesn't exactly allow him much time of his own and there's times his obligations mean cutting sleep from his schedule. in a perfect world/ideal scenario he'd go to bed around 11pm or midnight and get up around 9am or 10am.

10. what could wake them up: it would be easier to list what wouldn't wake him up — peter is by no means a deep sleeper and the smallest noises usually disturb him enough that he stirs awake. whether or not he ignores the source of that noise and rolls over to go back to sleep ?? totally different question

tagged by : @vicioushope i kiss u tagging : @spidersiren, @leatherforhell, @gardiennes, @gwenbiote, @arachnidiots ( pick muse !! ), @belovaes, @gobleir, @spinxeret, @selinaes, and you !!

[astonmartinii]

a very nonsense christmas | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x fem singer!reader

face claim: sabrina carpenter

based on this request: Hi, how are you can you please write something with Charles x singer reader like a part 2 of "nonsense... or is it?" based on Santa doesn't know you like I do music video something very wholesome idk you can ignore this if you want, hope you have a good day/night 🤍 - @rana030

MASTERLIST | BUY ME A KO-FI? | PART ONE

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,441,934 others

yourusername: do you hear those slay bells ringing? i love christmas so much that i'm giving you guys six new songs for this holiday season !!

view all comments

user1: mama is going straight on the nice list for this one

user2: christmas is saved

charles_leclerc: so proud of you cherie

yourusername: says the muse

charles_leclerc: you're my angel on the top of the tree

yourusername: as long as you're under the tree ready to be unwrapped

pierregasly: STOP

alexalbon: we MUST protect the sanctity of christmas

yourusername: oh alex, do not listen to the ep...

alexalbon: too late just pressed play

alexalbon: YOU NEED THE CHARLES DICKENS ???

yourusername: amazing word play, am i right?

alexalbon: no.

charles_leclerc: he doesn't meant that babe. lily has a commitment, he's just lonely

user3: y/n was like "if you weren't aware, i am getting DICKED DOWN for christmas"

user4: as much as i'd peel all of my skin off to be in either of their positions, good for her

maxverstappen1: i think nonsense christmas has single handedly killed my investigative journalism career. i am not analysing charles' massive sack

yourusername: damn right you won't be

charles_leclerc: maybe you should analyse it, you could learn something from it

maxverstappen1: hOW DARE YOU

yourusername

liked by taylorswift, charles_leclerc and 1,887,341 others

tagged: charles_leclerc, taylorswift & killatrav

yourusername: thank you to all the lovely people who came to the fruitcake release party ! xx

view all comments

user7: CHARLES AND TRAVIS IN ONE PLACE ALERT

user8: so does this mean we can get a y/n and charles appearance on the new heights podcast?

charles_leclerc: do you think people could tell i was about to pass out while playing the piano?

yourusername: definitely not !

maxverstappen1: yes we could

charles_leclerc: WHAT I WAS JUST NERVOUS AND I DIDN'T WANT TO LET Y/N DOWN AND TAYLOR WAS THERE SO I DIDN'T WANT TO EMBARRASS MYSELF

maxverstappen1: okay i didn't need the pity party. you were good, unfortunately very good. i need to learn piano now. i have to beat you in everything

yourusername: maybe you should've forgone the santa suit... it was quite warm

charles_leclerc: but you wanna be mrs claus ? (i also have a big north pole lol)

alexalbon: ENOUGH

user9: wait so like, was the grid at the release party?

user10: based on most of their instagram stories, and y/n's stories i'm gonna say yes

taylorswift: i had so much fun !! i love fruitcake and tell charlie his piano was great

charles_leclerc: SUCK ON THAT @maxverstappen1

taylorswift: ?

charles_leclerc: we've got bad blood taylor's version featuring kendrick lamar?

taylorswift: i see

maxverstappen1: he's the reason we can't have nice things

user11: someone free taylor from lestappen

killatrav: okay. the girls throw the best parties. esteban and pierre i own your team now, you guys gotta get better at drinking

yourusername: careful travis they're french ...

killtrav: is your boyfriend not also french? he's like a puppy dog

yourusername: HE'S MONAGASQUE

charles_leclerc: i am NOT french

estebanocon: i only threw up because eggnog is not what you guys advertise it to be

pierregasly: i'm not gonna lie i don't remember even seeing you last night

user12: okay so get invited to one of these parties is definitely on the bucket list now

charles_leclerc

liked by pierregasly, yourusername and 1,922,033 others

tagged: yourusername, killatrav

charles_leclerc: charles and travis 🤝 just happy we got a chance

view all comments

user13: if he's not like them i don't want it

user14: if santa doesn't pull through with a man like them under my tree this year ... imma be mad

killatrav: travis and charles 🤝 having girlfriends that make us giggle and swing our feet

charles_leclerc: does the honeymoon phase ever finish?

killtrav: well it definitely hasn't for me

maxverstappen1: NOOOOOOOOOOOO

alexalbon: say it ain't so

yourusername: haters gonna hate 😎

alexalbon: he is so happy it is bordering on insufferable

charles_leclerc: alex :(

alexalbon: i am very happy for you charlie and lily is definitely very happy for you, but if you talk to me for the TWELVE HOUR flight to brazil again i will terminate this friendship

killtrav: i am so confused

user15: poor travis and taylor are just being exposed to the grid chaos

yourusername: you posting this like i'm not the luckiest girl in the world

charles_leclerc: i just love you so much and i'm so glad you shortlisted me for your music video

yourusername: yeah spolier alert there was no shortlist. i wanted you and i didn't want to get out right rejected...

charles_leclerc: as if i would reject any offer from you i think i would've torn down maranello if they said i wasn't allowed to be in it

scuderiaferrari: ?

user16: i'm so obsessed with how much charles has embraced the wag life

user17: can't believe i get to live a life where i can bop along to music about how good in bed charles leclerc is

user18: they better not break up cause i may be tifosi but i shall be streaming

yourusername added to their story

yourusername

liked by taylorswift, charles_leclerc and 1,833,922 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: santa doesn't know you like i do baby

view all comments

user21: all i want for christmas is even more y/n and charles content

user22: mum and dad have kept us fed over the winter break

user23: i'm not ready for them to be separated when the season starts again :(

charles_leclerc: not to be that person but we're so hot

yourusername: no, you should say it louder

charles_leclerc: WE'RE HOT

maxverstappen1: can you people knock it off or we're not coming to your christmas party

yourusername: ERM ??? 🫤

alexalbon: you people have single handedly made me the grinch

yourusername: but but but ??? you all begged for an invite :(

charles_leclerc: FAKE and that's why you're all getting coal from us

user24: my god i am so lonely

user25: if i don't wake up to a charles shape gift under my tree i will not make it to next christmas

danielricciardo: just to be sure, this party is not going to be filmed and turned into a music video?

yourusername: it's just an old-fashioned shin dig girly don't worry

yourusername: or by the tone of this, should i be worried?

danielricciardo: no!

charles_leclerc: do NOT ruin my home please

danielricciardo: no promises xoxoxo

user26: y/n might want to film the party but I NEED THE FOOTAGE

user27: @tedkravitz boy do i have a gig for you

danielricciardo

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,093,445 others

tagged: charles_leclerc & yourusername

danielricciardo: do NOT drink the eggnog at a y/n christmas party this is a public safety announcement

view all comments

user28: i would commit unspeakable crimes to be present here

yourusername: if you weren't a fake fan you would've listened to fruitcake and would know we spike the eggnog 🤷‍♀️

danielricciardo: i am a fan !!!!!!!!!

yourusername: you asked me and yuki how we escaped the north pole last night

yukitsunoda0511: don't think i've forgotten about that, say goodbye to a tow in quali old man

danielricciardo: IT WAS A COMPLIMENT ELVES ARE CUTE?

charles_leclerc: don't call my girlfriend cute that's my job 🤨

danielricciardo: do you people ever let me live? i am battling a hangover like no other please stop shouting at me

charles_leclerc: maybe someone of your old age should manage his drink better

danielricciardo: THAT'S IT I'M GOING

yourusername: thanks we did actually want the kitchen floor back

user29: daniel calling y/n and yuki elves kills me

yourusername: we're not elf height we're cutie patootie height 💅

yukitsunoda0511: amen

alexalbon: i will endure the torture because that was fucking insane

maxverstappen1: @yourusername you're in charge of all after parties now sorry

yourusername: let charlie win and you got a deal

maxverstappen1: i'd rather drink my gin and tonic in a ditch than let that happen

charles_leclerc: BOOO

alexalbon: cocktail recipe immediately @yourusername

yourusername: you've changed your tune ?

alexalbon: i had fun, sue me. plus i am actually happy for charlie but please no more singing about his dick

yourusername: i can't make any promises

charles_leclerc: and there's plenty of material to get the creative juices flowing

alexalbon: FUCK OFF

maxverstappen1: FUCK OFF

user30: the grid will never know peace, not even at christmas time

charles_leclerc

liked by taylorswift, yourusername and 1,893,446 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: nothing like the holidays with the love of your life

view all comments

user35: how down bad all men should be

yourusername: best holidays ever !!!! love you charlie xx

charles_leclerc: my christmas wish last year came true, and now you're stuck with me

yourusername: no one i would rather be stuck with

charles_leclerc: I LOVE YOU

yourusername: I LOVE YOU MORE

user36: good thing i got presents this year or the sheer sight of this couple would make me so jealous i would spontaneously combust

user37: real

landonorris: you will see to the crime of the stupid amount of mistletoe you had up at that damn party

charles_leclerc: have you seen y/n? (don't answer that) obviously i want any excuse to kiss her

landonorris: i DON'T CARE I HAD TO KISS DANIEL FIVE TIMES I WILL NEVER RECOVER

danielricciardo: i know you enjoyed baby

landonorris: @yourusername @charles_leclerc YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS

yourusername: idk it looked like you enjoyed it to me

landonorris: you WATCHED?

yourusername: i filmed it :) top blackmail material, don't crash into charlie OR ELSE

charles_leclerc: thanks babe

landonorris: @georgerussell63 get the gdpa to intervene nOW

georgerussell63: eh i'm quite entertained

user38: this really is the giving season huh

arthurleclerc: do i mean nothing to you?

charles_leclerc: you're nowhere near as cute as y/n 🤷‍♀️

yourusername: awwwww charlie

arthurleclerc: EXCUSE ME? WHAT HAPPENED TO CHRISTMAS SPIRIT?

user39: charles is really ride or die lol

note: have a very merry christmas! i hope you guys all have a great holiday season and enjoy this quick one! i've been super busy but wanted to give you all a lil christmas treat - much love xx

[sam-loves-seb]

the bathroom drawer

"Mickey!" Ian yells. "Did you move my cologne?"

"Your what?" Mickey calls back, appearing in the bathroom doorway while buttoning up his shirt.

"My cologne."

"No. I don't even know where you keep that shit."

"In here!" Ian says, shaking his head as he rummages through the drawer below their bathroom sink. "I swear I left it in here."

"Lemme see," Mickey says, nudging Ian to the side. "You're shit at looking."

"I'm not shit at looking, it's just not fucking there."

"Yeah, yeah," Mickey grumbles, moving the junk in the drawer around. "Jesus Christ. How much shit do we got in here?"

"Too much," Ian muses, folding his arms over his chest and leaning his hip against the sink. "But it doesn't matter anyway. It's not in there. I've been looking for--"

"Found it." Mickey holds up the blue bottle with a smug grin.

Ian grabs it from him. "Whatever."

Mickey raises his eyebrows. "Whatever? That's what I get?"

Ian leans in and gives him a loud, smacking kiss on the cheek. "Thank you," he says instead.

"Better," Mickey grumbles.

Ian spritzes the cologne onto himself while Mickey keeps rummaging around in the drawer. He pulls out an empty toilet paper roll, a broken comb with too many teeth missing, and an old phone charger with exposed wires.

He throws them all in the trash. "This thing is a mess."

"Yeah," Ian says with a sigh, checking himself over in the mirror. He paws at his hair a bit. "We gotta do a deep clean in here one of these days. Closet's a disaster too."

"What the fuck is--"

Ian looks over at his husband when he doesn't finish his sentence.

Mickey's brows are furrowed as he holds up a thin black stick in front of his face. "Is this makeup?"

Ian huffs out a faint laugh. "Yeah."

"Debbie's?"

"That thing's old enough to be Fiona's," Ian tells him, taking it from Mickey. "But no. It's mine."

Mickey raises his brows. "Yours?"

Ian uncaps the tube, twists the end so the little black tip pushes through the end. "Eyeliner."

"Holy shit," Mickey says slowly. "How fucking old is that thing?"

"Old," Ian says, trying to read the chipped writing on the side for any kind of date. "Probably expired."

"That shit expires?"

"Supposedly. But who knows."

Mickey tilts his head, watching Ian examine the eyeliner. "How the hell did it end up here?"

"No idea," Ian tells him. How it survived in the Gallagher house for as long as it did and moved to their west side apartment is beyond him. "Probably got boxed up with some of my shit a long time ago."

"Huh," Mickey muses. He crosses his arms over his chest. "Can't believe you used to put that shit on every night."

"Me neither," Ian says. "You ever tried it?"

"What, make up?"

"Yeah."

"For a disguise once or twice," Mickey tells him with a shrug. "Never like, just 'cause."

Ian starts to grin. "You wanna?"

"Fuck no," Mickey says instinctively. He bites his lip. "Why? You gonna wear it tonight?"

"Why not?" Ian asks, facing the mirror and leaning in close. "We're already going to a club. Might as well get go all out."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah." Ian glances over at his husband. "You got a problem with that?"

Mickey shrugs. "No."

"Okay."

Mickey watches with rapt attention as Ian applies the eyeliner to himself. The stick is old for sure, and it takes a few passes to really get the make up on his eyelid. It only takes a minute though, and then Ian's eyes are outlined in black.

"There," he says, blinking and turning to face Mickey. "How do I look?"

"Weird," Mickey says.

"Sure, but like, crazy weird, or hot weird."

Mickey's brows pinch together. "...Hot weird."

Ian grins. "It's kinda doing it for you, isn't it?"

"No. Shut up," Mickey says quickly.

Ian laughs. "You should try it," he tells his husband. "It's fun."

"It looks like it's gonna get in my eyes."

"Maybe," Ian says with a shrug. "But I bet you'd look hot with it."

"You say that about everything you want me to wear."

"And I've never been wrong once."

Mickey makes a face. "Does it hurt?"

"No."

"...Can I take it off if it looks stupid?"

Ian's face relaxes. "You can take it off whenever you want," he says softly. "Doesn't ever have to leave this bathroom."

Mickey glares at the eyeliner, his face slowly melting into apprehensive reluctance. "Fucking... fine."

"Really?" Ian asks, perking up.

"How do I do it?"

"I can do it," Ian offers, holding up the eyeliner and his open hand. "Lemme put it on you."

Mickey sighs through his nose, then steps closer. He tilts his chin up and fits his face into his husband's waiting hands.

Ian kisses his temple. "Close your eyes."

Mickey does as told. His eyelashes flutter at the first press of the stick, eyelids scrunching at the new, weird sensation.

"Hold still," Ian whispers, trying not to poke him in the eye.

"Feels weird," Mickey mumbles.

"Yeah, but..." Ian pulls back, smiling at his work. "Open your eyes."

Mickey blinks them open, eyebrows bouncing with it. "So?"

"Damn," Ian says, grinning. "You look good, baby."

"Fuck off with that," Mickey grumbles, turning towards the mirror. He makes a face. "I look like a fucking alien."

"A hot alien."

Mickey gives him the side eye, but he doesn't immediately wipe the eyeliner off. He leans in close to the mirror, tilts his head this way and that. Pulls at the skin on his cheeks and his temples. "Weird," he says quietly.

"So," Ian starts, capping the eyeliner and tossing it back in the drawer. "You ready to go, or what?"

Mickey sighs heavily, taking one last look at himself in the mirror.

Ian slides in behind him, curls a hand around his hip. "Don't overthink it," he whispers, kissing his husband's temple. "If you like it, go with it."

"I don't know if I like it."

"That's okay too."

Mickey leans back against him. "It looks good on you."

Ian smiles softly. "Thanks."

Mickey hums. "Fine," he says, standing up straight. "Let's go. But if anyone says anything about it--"

"I know," Ian says, hands on his husband's shoulders as he follows him out of the bathroom. "You get to punch them."

"I get to punch them."

"Fine." Ian kills the bathroom light. "And we might have to hit the 24 hour CVS on the way home. I definitely don't have make up wipes."

[calliesmemes]

IN-CHARACTER QUOTES FROM DISCORD

UNHINGED SENTENCE STARTERS FEATURING THINGS SAID BY MYSELF AND MY FRIENDS WHILE WRITING AS OUR MUSES IN A CRACK-BASED NONCANON GROUP CHAT. This post is dedicated to Em, Liz, Tanny, Nellie, Mel, Ange, and everyone else in the server who recognizes these quotes — you know who you are 😈

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

“   Have you forgotten that you should not steal someone’s property? ”

“   I could slap that smug look off his face right now! ”

“   Your ears are a lie. ”

“   Woah woah that's - that's a bad word. ”

“   I don’t know if it’s allowed and quite frankly I don’t care. Fuck the rules. ”

“   Time for gremlin activities! ”

“   I hate this man. Let's prank him. ”

“   We are all going on strike today I swear ”

“   Looks like I need to invest in a kid leash. ”

“   DONT BE COWARDS!! JOIN THE STRIKE!! ”

“   I support her saying what needs to be said! I am done with the silencing of women!!!! ”

“   I like the dramatics. ”

“   I did not ask for a second opinion. ”

“   You seem to be doing a great job at being a nuisance. ”

“   NO BITING MY EMPLOYEES! ”

“   do you want me to bring you cheese? ”

“   Next move, start chewing on the door frames ”

“   I like crumbs. They are like a little midnight snack in my bed at night. ”

“   if he wants to be a worm, LET HIM BE A WORM ”

“   the rest of you suck my toe ”

“   To be fair I am simply vibing. ”

“   I am going to commit a war crime! ”

“   I am manifesting being happy. ”

“   Am I gonna talk shit WITH you guys? because im down to talk shit about pretty much anyone ”

“   Who says? We shall revolt without question. ”

“   Let's just start burning stuff. ”

“   Did you just call me... small? ”

“   Can I convert you with my kazoo propaganda? ”

“   We were radicalised by The Little Mermaid. ”

“   Penny in the swear jar, now. ”

“   My last words are, bros before hoes. ”

“   The old men are trying to be trendy. ”

“   I can do whatever I want too! ”

“   Can we go one day without an interruption from an American? ”

“   I am so sorry. He enjoys conflict. ”

“   Why is he so tall? ”

“   For legal reasons, kids, that's a joke. ”

“   Would you like to fight the adults? ”

“   You're not meant to bite people, it's frowned upon. ”

“   He’s a fun killer, don't listen to him! ”

“   Ow! Stop kicking me! ”

“   I have quite literally begged you not to kick, hit, or bite today. ”

“   BUT I thought we were buds, pals, amigos, chums, friends. ”

“   Oh shiiiii someone’s in trouble ”

“   How much caffeine have you had in the last hour? ”

“   I'll be honest they wouldn't be so bad if they didn't speak. ”

“   Is this goof meant to be dead or what? ”

“   I am a witch. ”

“   This one reeks of self confidence when he clearly doesn't think before opening his mouth. ”

“  I call bullshit on that rule! ”

“   The point is I have a cane and I’m not afraid to use it. ”

“   If you slap me, I’ll cane you. ”

“   Yippee for women. ”

“   FUCK THE PATRIARCHY ”

“   Sorry for being British. ”

“   Oi who's playing that ominous music? ”

“   I'm strong because I eat carrots. Oh wait or is that to see in the dark.... it's for something. ”

“   I will say sorry when i'm caught, don't you worry. ”

“   AND YOU CALLED ME UP AGAIN JUST TO BREAK ME LIKE A PROMISE! ”

“   ... He's done for. Broken beyond repair. Someone play Taylor Swift. ”

“   Please refrain from punching one another. ”

“   He is becoming one with the spider I believe. ”

“   If anybody asks I will say I made you, then you will not get in trouble! ”

“   Can I be a girlboss too? I am not rude to women and I do what i like ”

“   Yippee for patriotism! ”

“   … i could make you guys rat costumes ”

“   Do you think if we started stealing bread we would lose our jobs? ”

“   why do British people ”

“   … you all need therapy. ”

“   Do you ever feel if you breathe the wrong way he will bite you? ”

“   I actively avoid whatever this is. ”

“   CARRY ME. ”

“   What if, and hear me out, they both promise not to do it again? ”

“   I wanna steal all his socks. ”

“   My socks were stolen! ”

“   Hey, watch it now. Only I'm allowed to insult me. ”

“   You couldn’t whisper to save your life. It’s pitiful. ”

“   Both of you are insufferable. ”

“   The law is overrated. ”

“   I’m afraid. Miss, you aren’t my type. ”

“   No. I swear on my life. I am being a gentleman ”

“   I support women’s wrongs. ”

“   ONE FOR ALL AND ALL FOR ONE!!! ”

“   GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE RIGHT NOW ”

“   He bites? Are you .. joking? Please say you're joking. ”

“   If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain ifyou're not into yoga if you have half a brain if you like makin' love at midnight in the dunes on the cape then I'm the love that you've looked for write to me and escape 🎶🎶 ”

[mrsnancywheeler]

Okay the same reader as the fight one but imagine if someone in the band sees how much they fight and offers to take her off his hands…or goes to her about it

long blurb with mentions of drinking, drugs, smoking, and nsfw topics

me about to write another long ass blurb, but thinking about eddie pining after reader and always watching, thinking about how she could do so much better then billy fucking dunne

you're always fighting and leaving until billy calls you back or you get bored again so you show up. rarely is there apologies, sometimes he tells you that your his muse and he needs you around as some sort of half apology to say you're not replaceable with just any groupie. but you let it work on you because when things are good, they're good, he's kind, and loving, so sweet, but the bad is the worst it possibly could be. and for how you tell yourself you've always known he wouldn't pick you forever, wouldn't settle down and that you were okay with that, you just know you're lying to yourself. because when you find out that last fight you had where you stomped off afterwards and spent a couple of hours sitting in a diner crying, billy was busy getting sucked off my some other groupie, you think this might be your limit. for all you've said you'd never actually even dreamed of even looking at anyone else and the pain in your chest is so immense. it only gets worse as you listen to billy and the rest of the band perform some song her wrote about you, a confirmation of his feelings without him having to commit face to face with you. it makes your blood boil when he's singing about how regardless of everything he'll always pick you, always want you.

so when everyone finishes and he's smiling looking over at you with a, "so, what'd you think, baby?" and you pull out that slow clap you hope he knows he's done fucked up because the rest of the band sure does. and he doesn't ask if you're okay or look too concerned, just annoyed, scoffing slightly, "what now?"

"I think you're a liar and the whole thing is fucking bullshit!" You announce

"don't do this right now, we're trying to rehearse." his frustration only serves as fuel to your fire, and you look around the room to see the awkward glances around the room, eddie glaring holes into the back of billy's head.

"what? do you want me to say you did a great job, give you a kiss and hug, and then scamper off so some other girl can suck you off? is that what you want billy?"

"not right now. if you're not gonna sit there and do what you're good at, then get out of the studio. go spend some of your daddy's money, you'll get over it."

his dismissivness makes you want to scream. how dare he. why did you have to fall for someone like him? "like you've said, I'm sure you can find some other groupie to give you praise and attention. you're the fucking worst, billy."

you're storming out of the room, followed by his voice, "you're not the only pretty girl! one of so fucking many!"

you don't know how long you've spent sitting on the cold cement, back up against the building as you smoke a cigarette. trying desperately not to cry because you just want him to love you the way movies told you men loved. but this wasn't a movie, he was a fucking rockstar and you were in fact just another groupie who he was sick of. the way you wanted to cry was embarrassing and you quick wiped away any stray tears when you heard footsteps approaching.

"mind if I join you?" and there was eddie, trying to give a comforting smile. you shook your head and he sat down, your offered him a cigarette which he took, for a while it was silent. "you deserve better."

you laughed, "yeah, maybe." no, you knew you did, but you didn't want better. you were too attached to billy dunne. "did he call some kind of break or did you just storm out? bet he'd love that."

eddie chuckled, he loathed billy, so the latter would've been just fine with him. "called a break." you thought about how right now billy was probably busy getting fucked by some other girl, some other groupie who had patiently waited her turn. you didn't mean to sniffle, but you did. suddenly eddie's lips were on yours, you wanted to lean into the soft, loving comfort but you couldn't. it felt wrong.

"eddie-" you muttered as you pulled away.

"he doesn't see you like I do, you deserve to be treated so much better, and he's stupid for not being able to see that. just because he's the lead singer doesn't mean you have to be stuck as his groupie, especially when he treats you like you're disposable."

"eddie, I can't do that to him. it's wrong."

"he does everything he can with other girls except fucking them, you're allowed to have something."

"well, I'm just me and he's billy goddamn dunne."

"he's just billy dunne, and you're strong, perseverant, beautiful, funny, compassionate, the whole damn package." you snort through the laughter which makes him smile, and you feel bad because he's sweet, you like him, but you've had a taste of billy and are desperately trying to hold onto ship. "he's too lucky, let me give you what you deserve-"

"what's going on?" billy's voice interrupts the rest of eddie's speech that you honestly might have fallen for, if you focused on the actually being able to constantly feel appreciated by some someone. eddie glares at the other man.

"we're talking." you say softly as billy walks closer. he holds a hand out to you expectantly.

"come inside with me, baby. let's talk in private." eddie's eyes are urging you to refuse, to stay with him, but you don't heed the look. so you take billy's hand a and let him lift you off the ground.

and it's hard to miss the way eddie gazes at you after the that, the way he comforts you post arguments and reminds you not to take it to heart, and you feel bad that the way you burn for billy is a forest fire compared to the way you burn for eddie. and he spends his days waiting for you to realize billy was never worth the struggle and to have him instead.

@nomorespahgetti

[mins-fins]

bring it back

&&. you tell donghyuck all the time, but his fists are always so bruised he doesn't listen.

pairing: lee donghyuck x m!reader

genre: weird rejected hybrid thing

warnings: literally fighting, is this relationship safe? idk!!

word count: 1.3k

notes: this spawned while i was reading one of my old old things back from my wp era and i suddenly got inspired.. only reason i chose hyuck is bc hes the first member who came to mind when i thought about writing 😣 im also a little obsessed with him atm.. i sort of left you all with radio silence yesterday, was supposed to post a timestamp but didn't, my apologies isanator nation (like 2 ppl) anw! don't take this too seriously, i don't get into fights and don't know much about fighting, my google search history looks very concerning rn ☺️

"come on! is that really all you got? those hits were weak".

donghyuck sits up defeated, but he doesn't allow for such an expression to cross his face, the last thing he wants to do is look like a sore loser in front of you, though he clearly is with how he got knocked to the ground by a single punch.

he refuses to think about the fact.

you raise an eyebrow at the sight of him catching his breath on the floor, a taunting chuckle leaves your lips, a chuckle donghyuck narrows his eyes at. if you knew sparring meant you'd have to meet donghyuck's piercing glare more than once in the span of five minutes, you would've offered to be his sparring partner much earlier.

you think he looks adorable when he's mad.

"done verbally berating me now?"

"not sure i'll ever be done".

you extend your hand forward, and donghyuck takes it instantly. once you help him to his feet, he gives you a pout, one you press your finger to. "what the hell are you pouting about?" you inquire, and donghyuck's eyes roll.

"you beat me like— five times, y/n".

you scoff lightly, shoving your boyfriends shoulder. "and i'll continue beating you if you don't stop hesitating before every hit" you lean closer to press a kiss to his lips, trying to erase the pout with an act of affection, but he stays pouting.

you snicker as you pinch his cheek, turning on your heel and walking towards your duffel bag on the other side of the room. what can you say? throwing your boyfriend around the room makes a guy thirsty.

donghyuck stares at you for a moment, studying your figure, then groans. "y/n".

"hm?"

you turn back to look over at him, and donghyuck has to stifle his laugh. how is it that you look so harmless right now when you just spent up to almost an hour breaking every bone in his body? he finds it hilarious how quick you can switch tunes. "one more round".

shock gleams in your eyes. "you sure? i thought you were tired.."

donghyuck is quick to shake his head, suddenly filled with an abrupt surge of determination. "yeah, this'll be the last one".

you blink, but you don't seem to mind, because you shrug, dropping your bottle of water and beginning to stretch your arms. "i'm starting to think you like being thrown around, should i note this down as a kink of yours?"

your smile is tormenting,

the good kind though.

"do whatever you want y/n~" donghyuck muses, a sing songy tone of voice accompanying his words. you study his body language for a while, cracking your knuckles. "i'm not letting you win again".

"ah really? you think you're gonna beat me this time?"

"wanna bet?"

you seem to like the sound of that, if the way your eyes light up is any indication. donghyuck's got you, perfect. you scour your mind for ideas, tilting your head as you smile at your boyfriend. "fine then, if you manage to knock me to the ground i'm all yours next week".

donghyuck's eyes widen to a comically huge size. "you serious?"

"slow your roll, baby, i said if you manage to knock me to the ground".

donghyuck clicks his tongue, an acception of the bet you put down. "don't underestimate me so quickly".

"underestimating? i'm just saying what's true, how many times did the sim kid knock you out last week? ten? fifteen? if i didn't know any better, i would've assumed you were weak".

god you're so skilled at this, you know exactly how to hit donghyuck where it hurts, both literally and figuratively. you know exactly what to say, and know exactly how they'll affect him. trash talk is something your so good at, sometimes donghyuck forgets it's all an act.

you know donghyuck can fight better than he actually does, his attempts at punches right now are vastly different to the punches he throws during actual fights. you know he's much stronger than he thinks, but for some reason, he seems to.. soften around you.

it's cute in hindsight, but he's been slacking lately, and you have to get him back on track.

"weak huh?"

"yeah, you going easy on me?"

your posture is relaxed, you don't want to make the first move, your waiting for donghyuck to surge forward and try to hit you. he narrows his eyes, your feet tapping rhythmically onto the floor and your arms crossed. "not a chance".

you chuckle at donghyuck's statement, a chuckle that angers donghyuck. what the actual fuck are you being so cocky about? he wants to wipe that smirk off your face, no, scratch that, he wants to punch that smirk off your face, he's going to make you wish you never said anything.

without saying anything more, donghyuck surges forward, a move you weren't expecting, but one you knew how to deal with already. a right hook, simple, easy to dodge and easy to counteract.

"was that a punch? i bet renjun could throw a better one than that".

donghyuck grits his teeth.

"don't mention renjun".

"oh? am i striking a nerve?"

you are striking a nerve, and donghyuck is about to strike you in the face. he keeps throwing punches, a flurry of hooks left and right, he has to hit you, he will hit you.

you're completely unfazed, the hooks nothing you haven't seen before. you swing your right hand over to parry the hit donghyuck sends you, using your position to your advantage and delivering a punch to his side. it catches him off guard and he winces, reeling back in just the slightest.

you give him no time to adjust, taking his distraction into consideration and surging towards him, a left jab to the side of his stomach. he stumbles back, trying to gather himself as his head spins in dizziness from the hit you delivered.

you let out a small scoff. "come on, hyuck, you have to hit me".

donghyuck grunts, moving forward with a left hook this time. "i'm trying" he grits his teeth, an action that makes you smile. donghyuck gives a small tch at the sight of you smiling, he hates it (that's a lie, he loves it).

you don't even try to hit him back, just continue stepping backward as donghyuck sends hit after hit.

he narrows his eyes, but you just smile again, you're really starting to get annoying. it's then that donghyuck notices something, your legs, he can use that to an advantage of his.

so, without any prior warning, donghyuck punches your lower stomach, a punch you weren't expecting. when you reel back from the hit, he decides to take his chance. an uppercut, a right jab to your side, and a haymaker to the side of your face.

donghyuck doesn't know where all of that came from, but it seems to do the trick, because you have no more strength to continue fighting. you stumble for a moment before falling over, hitting the ground and rolling over as you clutch your stomach.

donghyuck immediately gasps as he sees your state. "holy shi— oh my god! are you okay!?"

you give a tired smile, sending a thumbs up to the air. "i'm alright, that was great, babe".

it's only then that it dawns on donghyuck. "i beat you".

you nod.

donghyuck breathes in and out, he truly can't believe this. "i beat you, holy shit i beat you!"

you chuckle at how excited he sounds, breathless from the blows he delivered to you. "yeah, you did, congrats champ".

donghyuck falls down beside you, flinging his arm over your stomach and moving closer to you. "i get to have you all to myself now".

you raise an eyebrow. "you've always had me all to yourself".

donghyuck giggles. "i know, but i knocked you to the ground this time".

"don't get used to it".

[readingwiththestars]

₊˚⊹♡ RECKLESS

["it's a good thing you're not here, because i still havent found my courage."]

| ✮ 4.5 stars |

THOUGHTS ° ᡣ𐭩 . ° . [spoilers ahead]

okayyy let me just start off with WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK WAS THAT ENDING LAUREN???? i'm not okay because of it. like nuh uh get lost. u had no right to do that (im saying this as if it didnt get spoiled for me and i didnt gaslight myself the entire book read that it wasn't going to happen)

i would like to straight up say this seemed like a filler book. just a set up for the next one, it didn't really have all too much plot-wise aside from pae and kai's romance. it was less on the fantasy side and more on the romance but i still enjoyed it a lot. and obviously since it was a filler book there was less character development (for some- im looking at you paedyn)

kai and pae were really cute in this book honestly (and as it mostly focuses on the romance ofc they were) the banter and everything was so wonderful to read i was giggling and kicking my feet wayyy to much. the romance was romancing but also not romancing at the same time (im not even gonna try to explain that just use vibes)

i do feel as though lauren's writing has definitely improved from powerless. she has this whimsical magical style of writing that i love it really takes me into the world of the book (mostly). other times the long sentences were too much in moments. like lauren. we did not need to know the colour of the bricks in the market at this certain moment in time when you'd already explained the colour two pages ago-

CHARACTERS ° ᡣ𐭩 . ° .

paedyn - ok i love her. i really do she's such a good fmc BUT for me in this book she was boring-ish. and hella indecisive like girly pop if i had kai talking to me like that i'd be folding so damn fast- but yeah it felt like she didn't have too much character development aside from finding out her dad was actually her dad. also i idk who the fuck she was trying to fool with her 'i hate you' to kai, like be fucking for real bitch no you dont.

kai - ok bye i could write a whole rant on why i love this man. like im sat. this book felt more like kai's book (as powerless felt like pae's) imo we got more on his backstory and i think his character (and povs) were more interesting for me to focus on. also his flirting and little one liners had me giggling and shit my sister actually woke up to me grinning like an idiot under torch light-

kitt - bye idek why i made this section for him. this is going to entirely be hate fr. OKAY WE GET IT DUDE UR A GHOST WHATEVER. OH MY GOSH U MISS UR DAD BUT IN THE NEXT POV U DONT LIKE BITCH CHOOSE A SIDE IDC ABT UR WHINY ASS. ALSO U CLEARLY HAVE AN OBSESSION WITH PAEDYN LIKE FUCKING HELL DUDE SHE IS UR 'MUSE' OR WHATEVER GET OVER YOURSELF. EUGH AND THEN PROPOSING TO HER?? YEAH SURE BUDDY "YOUR FEELINGS FOR HER DIED" MHM YUP OKAY TOTALLYYY *clears throat awkwardly* can you tell i hate him?

QUOTES ° ᡣ𐭩 . ° . [its like all kai... im not even sorry about it either]

"you are my proof of paradise." - kai

"call us even. call me crazy. i don't care. just... just call me yours." - kai

"under different curcumstances i promise you im much more fun tied up." - kai (WHEN I TELL YOU I SCREECHED AND STARED AT THE PAGE. MALAKAI AZER-)

"just pae and kai." - kai

"she was supposed to be my forever. now i'll watch her become someone else's. because the beast doesn't get the beauty." - kai

jahsdgj i can't wait for the next book hehe

[greenerteacups]

forever grateful to you for sharing your musings, as if the book writing weren't great enough and hard work enough, you truly spoil us and i love you.

I'm popping in here to ask if you would like to talk about how you see Dumbledore. Sometimes I feel his manipulative side is abused in fanfiction, depicting little more than a heartless chess master.

And well, I guess I'm curious to find out if Lionheart Albus has a heart and will we get to see it. Maybe the more generous glimpses you give us of Snape and his interactions with him will shed some light on his hidden depths? Or will his appearances remain fleeting and enigmatic, always far and above all the little people we do know and adore?

Sorry, I know you can't possibly be completely balanced in your portraying of the whole cast, or they would spread too thin. I am here for the plot, for the Dramione and the Blacks, but I deeply enjoy all the character building (I truly live for all of them, not only our loved ones, I even cherish Warrington with sincere hate and am waiting for his comeuppance ) so I thought I would ask if you wouldn't mind a few comments on our opaque headmaster.

Thank you, friend! You're really kind.

Dumbledore has a relatively minor role in Lionheart for a few reasons — chief among which is, as you point out, that we just don't have time for everybody to get the same level of characterization the mains do. I have plot justifications for that, but it'd be disingenuous to suggest otherwise: Dumbledore's minor because I'm less interested in him than I am in Snape and Narcissa, and Lionheart is much more about Draco's sphere of the world than Harry's. That being said, I think some people forget how small Dumbledore's role is in the original books. He pretty much exists to deliver exposition and tell Harry how to beat the final boss; dude doesn't even get a gesture at a backstory until he's already dead. In fact, it's kinda weird to me that everyone (including a lot of people in the series) treats Dumbledore like he's some kind of guardian for Harry, especially with respect to the decision to keep him at the Dursleys. I know it's set up in the prologue, but if I'm Dumbledore, and I'm catching strays for Vernon Dursley being a piece of shit, I'm gonna be like:

The TLDR on Dumbledore is he's blamed way too much for stuff he doesn't do instead of the stuff he does. People seem to blame him for everything bad that happens to Harry because he's a competent adult in the general vicinity of the kid. But with the possible exception of hiring Lockhart — a bad decision I attribute to Early Installment Weirdness and, just maybe, a certain scarcity of applicants for a position where the last dude Literally Fucking Died — there's not a whole lot of shit that happens to Harry in the first few books Dumbledore could've prevented. Plus, he does in fact have Other Shit to be Doing. Is he a really powerful wizard who probably could've saved Harry's ass in a lot of the fights he gets into? Yes. Does he also have a whole school to run, a secret guerrilla group to direct, a Ministry full of political enemies to placate, and — oh yeah — a snake-faced immortal evil sorcerer he's playing 4D chess with at all times? Yes!

The whole lamb-to-slaughter thing with Harry is admittedly quite dark, but I don't read it as machiavellian. For one, Dumbledore obviously comes to this conclusion after a lot of deliberation, and to his death, he refuses to tell Harry about it, because (one assumes) he never intends to kill Harry himself. He's willing to hinge the fate of the free world on his respect for Harry's autonomy and/or his faith that Harry will make the "right" choice. That's pretty humane, given the circumstances. And he holds off on telling Harry about the horcruxes because... he doesn't want to inform a literal child that he'll eventually have to kill himself for the war effort. Oh, GOD, what a SCHEMING MONSTER. Surely this is motivated by menace, and not the grieving reluctance of a seasoned veteran who wants to preserve whatever few years of happiness this kid can eke out of life.

The areas where Dumbledore is morally shady come out most in his interactions with other adults. His conversation with Severus in 1981, for instance, is the one time in the books where I was legitimately frightened of him, because it's a rare time he's completely without mercy or grace. "What will you give me in return, Severus?" is a character-defining line, because Snape has just told him that two twenty-somethings and their infant child are about to be murdered, and Dumbledore's hit back with the subtextual equivalent of: "Tough shit. Why is it my problem?" Which is COLD AS FUCK! And we can kind of infer that he's not in earnest here, that he's manipulating Severus by making him think Dumbledore won't protect the Potters (even though they're Order members, which this theory requires us to assume Severus doesn't know) so that he can get him to work as a spy — but we don't know that for certain, right? It's all inference. We hope that his implicit threat isn't genuine, but what would happen if Severus said no, and walked away? How much did Albus understand about Snape's feelings for Lily, and what kind of person does it take to bluff like that in front of a known Legilimens? That line is intimidating as fuck whether or not Albus means it.

It's bits like these, where he's talking to people that he actually dislikes, where we get hints of the real Machiavellian Albus Dumbledore, and it's absolutely fascinating. He's the veteran of two wars, going on three when he dies, and you can tell in how he conducts himself. That includes, by the way, his gentility with children and his respect for innocence. But he's not just Good Funny Grandfather Dude or Crafty Mastermind. He's a general. He's been waging wars from the back lines since his twenties. That does something to your brain, and it doesn't leave a lot of you left over for anything else.

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #19

Riddle's Extremely Specific FOP Problems

Just came from looking at screenshots I'd saved of Dev, like these ones from "A New Dev-elopment":

I don't think I've said this yet, but the funny thing about Dev is that his hair reminds me of how I draw Happy Peppy Gary, who's been one of my main doodle muses since 2016. They both have ginger spikes:

This week I actually redesigned Gary's hair by letting it grow longer and more curly in the back, so I'll keep Dev's short in the back and only spiky in the front.

They have different skin and eye colors, etc., but it is funny that like, 6(?) years ago, I put Gary in a zipper hoodie.

I do a lot of traditional art, and I'm really gonna have to do a sketchpage nailing their designs down so they look different in pencil.

My current Gary design does have a spiral in his hair since I do that for all my witches, and I don't think that'll ever come up for Dev, especially if Dale Dimm really is Dev's ancestor - the one person who's extremely UNlikely to be a witch - so... there's that.

Some old Gary sketches where he IS in his Learnatorium clothes:

I feel like I could redraw any of these poses with Dev, lol. The freckles do a ton of heavy lifting here.

....... I've been writing Ed Leadly and Gary as rivals for YEARS and this is once again adding a cruel layer of irony to my "Ed Leadly as Dev's grandpa" situation.

Every time I see this kid, I see My Boy in him.

They are the same person to me...

The Haunting of Wells House

I like how Marcus keeps calling his daughter Hazelnut. It's cute. I'm glad to see him ready to hunt the "apartment ghost" he's been after since Episode 1.

Hooray for Cosmo and Wanda acting like neighbors!

I feel like they shouldn't be giving a horror movie to a child if they haven't seen it themselves and then walk back to their room, especially since their line of work is about trauma recovery (or at least... helping kids avoid hurt). They should know better than that.

I'm so glad you can see into their apartment from the hall. Literally nothing stops you or hides their magic stuff. You can just do it...

Marcus sniffing the video while fancy dinner music plays is my everything. They're BOTH silly.

I like how Cosmo and Wanda poofed up a TV for the apartment and included cobwebs and spiders on it. I guess that makes sense; they were giving Hazel a horror movie.

Ooh, ghostly lightning spirit of the actress trapped in the video?

Hazel has learned nothing from her last experience of wishing to be part of a TV show. She's 10.

Wait, so... Cosmo and Wanda can hear Hazel's casual wish from across the hall? And poof over?

Uh, maybe we don't tell that to Dev, who just flipped out last episode when Peri didn't show up despite Dev whisper-calling for him when Vicky was putting him to work...

She... Also, I can't believe Marcus left his daughter under a heavy machine for 4 hours.

So far, our only canon fairy death fits the OG series' implied canon that only non-magical items can kill Fairies [i.e. "magic doesn't affect magic" from "Abra-catastrophe"], so I like that.

I don't have much to say. Pepper seems interesting I suppose, and I can probably have her be a friend of Blonda's in 'fic.

I enjoy Jorgen grumpily cleaning up magic messes. That feels right.

... Unclear if Jorgen is keeping a bunch of fairies locked in the basement or if he just has a shelf full of similar-looking items.

[cordeliawhohung]

one of my favorite things about pet au is that simon doesn't care. does not. give a shit. about bonnie. every time i see you respond to people who "suggest" he becomes softer or gentler, i tear my hair out. are we not reading the same fic? that would be a complete 180. it would only make sense if he hit his head. hard.

oh i'm about to yap under the cut and maybe be a little mean

tldr at the end

ngl i nearly almost gave up writing for pet!au because of shit like that lmao. and like, i get in the beginning the story wasn't really a story at all. and i think that's obvious since it started out with more of like, musings with really quick writing. something i wasn't really putting effort into because at first i was thinking it was just a quick idea or whatever. and so a lot of what i was saying with interactions in my asks and stuff like that were just vague ideas. like at one point i was going to put in a graphic non-con scene with simon and bonnie as a "lesson" to her and decided against it because i wanted to take a different route about how he was going to interact with her and when i announced simon and bonnie were never going to fuck i think that turned a lot of people away from the series lmao (at least, on tumblr anyway).

and honestly, i was kind of glad because i stopped getting the bombarding asks of "what if xyz" and "is simon really never going to like bonnie?" and stuff like that for the most part because that shit was killing. me. oh my god. like if you look back at the asks in my pet!au tag that was all i was fucking getting i swear to god.

and look, i get it. this is the horny site. people are going to be horny. but it's super frustrating when people try to hijack your story (believe it or not, this isn't a group project lmao) and act upset or disappointed when a story isn't going their way. i love those twisted horny fics, too. and so does everyone else that's why there's a fucking trillion of them out there on this site and ao3. hell, i even have some. such as this kidnapping soapgaz fic or this ghoap x reader fic that is basically pet au in another universe lmao.

to put those works out, have them there for people to read, and then to have this fic for a different reason that i have now stated several times and have requested that this stay a horror fic and then have people give backhand comments about how they wish it was xyz is super frustrating as a writer. asking "is xyz ever gonna happen. damn" like you're entitled to answers about the future of the story, or trying to see if it's 'worth your time' to continue reading is just. infuriating beyond polite words.

i had to start deleting and not responding to certain things because it was just getting too frustrating. but i am honestly so endlessly grateful to people who actually try to engage with the story i'm writing and not the one they want me to write. i could literally smooch all of you on the foreheads if i was able to. but like, i had this problem with Leftovers too. i think something that has made fandom honestly extremely difficult to keep enjoying is that people treat you like you're an ai if you're a writer. like you're some bot you can shove a prompt into and then get a response curated for you and you can just keep trying and trying and trying and bugging and bugging and bugging if you don't like it and want it changed. like i'm not a human being.

anyway, if i could boil this all down to one paragraph, i would say:

Learn when a story isn't for you, and find a different one instead of trying to dictate or complain to the author that it's not going how you hoped. If you want to talk about a story to an author, please talk about the story that we have written/are writing, and not the one you wished we would write. And, just maybe, if someone has expressed they really hate certain types of comments about a fic, maybe stop making those comments, even as a joke. Truly, it makes me feel like shit.

anyway, thank you anon. for giving me a platform to rant about something that's been bugging me for a bit. and also for just... getting me. for getting the story and what it's trying to say. horny fics are fun, but this storyline is deeply important to me and how it plays out. i get it's not fun, but there is a deeper meaning behind it all and it's really comforting to hear that someone not only enjoys, but actually understands what i'm trying to say. like, for once i'm not being talked over about my own story lmao.

[im-ovulating]

(A/n: this is entirely self indulgent btw (which is ironic bc I /can/ swim but idc I just want an excuse for Luci to hold me okay😭))

(Ironic bc as soon as I started writing this, Milk of the Siren by Melanie Martinez started playing lmao)

(If you don't know, it's basically about getting revenge on men and drowning them)

Word Count: 1,422

Summary: Lucifer finds out MC doesn't know how to swim and decides to change that

Warnings: don't know if this needs to be a warning but: reader can't swim (obvi)

Age Rating: Pg 13

Swimming Lessons: Lucifer x Fem! Reader

------------------------

'I can do this... It's gonna be fine, I'm gonna be fine.'

You're standing at the door to the RAD pool as you try to steel yourself for what's to come.

.

The House of Lamentation had gone for a beach day a week prior; just taking a day to wind down from exams and student council duties. You had managed to keep your inability to swim a secret for most of the day under the guise of keeping Beel from eating all the snacks.

All good things must come to an end, though. Cue Mammon chasing you down to throw you in the ocean.

All you could do was panic as you desperately tried to keep your head above the waves. Your feet slipping as the sand gave under you, unable to support the weight of your hysteric kicking.

But just as fast as you were thrown in, you're pulled out.

You sputter as you wiped the salty water from your eyes, your arm in someone's vice grip as they yank you to land. Looking to your savior, you're met with am angry Lucifer glaring at your assailant.

"I really should stop expecting you to start acting like the second oldest brother. No matter what punishments you recieve, no matter how many lectures, you never seem to grow up. It's one thing when you cause problems for yourself, it's a completely different problem when you almost kill an exchange student. You're a sorry excuse for an avatar, Mammon."

"Hey!- That's not fair! How's I s'posed to know the human can't swi-"

"Enough! Everybody, start packing. We're going home." The groans and protests are silenced with a cold glare leveled towards them.

One by one the brothers file off to gather everything with the occasional (read: frequent) insult or snide comment to the second born.

.

After the ordeal was done and everyone was back at the HoL, Lucifer had cornered you in your room.

You were unpacking your beach bag when he came in, door clicking shut behind him.

"You can't swim." He doesn't ask.

"What of it?" You ask, looking over your shoulder at him as you gather your bathing suit and towel to throw in the laundry hamper.

"Why?"

You shrug, moving back to your bag to put away your sunglasses and spf. "I don't know, I just never learned."

Minutes pass in silence as he watches you unpack, the only noise is the ruffling of your bag accompanied with the occasional clack of something dropping.

Eventually he breaks the silence. "Would you like to?"

"Like to what?"

"Would you like to learn to swim?"

You stop to think about it. "Um, I feel like I would just get embarrassed... Most people learn when they're kids and the ones that don't, rarely learn. I mean, can you really imagine me in a pool surrounded by literal children who swim better than me?"

You chuckle at the mental image of yourself with water wings on. "I think I'll pass."

"I was referring to me teaching you." He still hasn't moved from his sentry position as you shuck your now empty bag into your closet.

"Like, alone? With you? In a pool? With water?" No offense to him but you feel like all it would take is one wrong move and you'll have annoyed him to the point of drowning you. You tell him so, earning a rare Lucifer smile.

"You'll be safe." He muses. "I have an inclination that Lord Diavolo wouldn't take too kindly to me killing one of his exchange students. Much less one of his favorite ones."

"Ha ha," you fake. "Funny, though I'm far from his favorite.'

"But I guess I'll trust you."

.

So here you are, about to potentially enter your very own death chamber.

'Oh, god- It's not going to be fine.' Your heart starts to pick up but before you can fully freak out you hear a voice from inside.

"Are you going to come in or just stare at the door?" Lucifer calls from the other side of the door.

No turning back now. You push the surprisingly heavy door open, revealing an even more surprisingly sized pool. It easily puts an Olympic sized swimming pool to shame. You can scarcely see the bottom even in the so-called shallow end.

Lucifer is already in, arms holding his upper body out of the water as he waits for you to join him. You can't lie, you're having a bit of a struggle to not stare at his toned arms and what you can see of his sculpted chest.

"Come on, the water isn't going to bite."

"Says you," you mutter as you strip to your swimsuit. You pad over to the edge, sitting down to put your legs in first. Taking a deep breath, you push off, keeping a death grip on the siding.

A couple feet separate you from the avatar of pride.

"Okay, now push off and try to pad over to me." He holds out a hand to you.

"I thought you were supposed to be teaching me?" You're trying not to panic or look into the depths beneath you.

"I am. I need to see what you can do before I can help with what you can't." He states, gesturing you towards him.

"If I die, I swear to god, I will haunt you for the rest of your life. If you think Mammon is bad, just you wait until you see what ghost Y/n has in store for you." With one last proclamation of wrath, you shove off, more tossing yourself towards him than paddling over to him, but that's as much as he's getting from you.

As soon as your head submerges, you panic, arms flailing as you try to reach out to Lucifer. You feel his hand grip your forearm as he hauls you back up. It's when you clear your eyes of the awful, chlorinated water that you notice he had moved the both of you further into the pool. There's no way you can reach the siding from here.

"Fucking hell!" You scramble to cling tighter to Lucifer. "I'm gonna die. This is how I die-"

"Calm down," he interrupts. "You are going to die if you don't stop panicking."

He pulls you away from his body, causing your nails to dig further into his skin. "Look at me."

You do. Panting with pupils blown from fear.

"Are you drowning?"

"I-" "Are you?"

You swallow. "No."

"Exactly, and I told you I wouldn't let you; do you think I'm going back on my word not even 5 minutes in?"

"No..."

"Okay then. you said you'd trust me, so do so. Kick your legs lightly. Almost in a pedaling rhythm." He instructs. "We're going to start with keeping you above the surface."

And so, your legs start moving, the force of the water pushing back with each movement is a bit odd, but not too bad.

When you get a good rhythm going Lucifer drops your arms. "Keep kicking and stay calm."

You start to sink a bit but try to stay calm.

"Kick a bit harder."

You start to gain back face-to-water distance and you let yourself get excited.

"I'm doing it!-" In the process of celebrating, you stop kicking.

Just before your head goes under, Lucifer pulls you up yet again.

"What happened to 'keep kicking'?" He asks.

You look up to answer, only to find that his face is way closer than you thought. All too sudden, you're aware of his tight hold around your waist and how your chests press together as your hands rest on his shoulders. Your legs lightly brush against each other as you both kick to stay afloat.

"..."

"..."

Neither of you break the silence as your eyes stay locked together.

Are you going insane, or is his face getting closer?

No, it definitely is. Your noses bump as Lucifer tilts to the side. Your eyes are sliding shut and your lips are a hair's width apart when the pool door slams open.

Both of you jump apart as much as you can without him letting you sink. Luke stands at the entrance, staring at you with a look of shock.

"I- I was looking for Beelzebub- He... He ate the last of a cake I made and ran. I- Sorry." With that the angel scurries away, effectively taking the tension with him.

"..."

"I think we're done for the day." Lucifer says.

"Yep. Completely."

[direwolfrules]

EAH Glee AU

I do not have time right now to work on my actual writing- midterms are done so now we're just jumping right into final papers- but have an AU outline post.

Professor Pied Piper, taking inspiration from some of his best high school memories, gets Headmaster Grimm to reinstate the school glee club.

Meanwhile, Madame Baba Yaga fears the new activity will steal away talent from her prize cheer-hexing team, the Ever After High Cheerios (I can’t think of a good fairytale-ification for this, I will accept suggestions). To rectify this situation, she sends in three of her girls undercover with the goal of sabotaging the glee club.

Basically, Pied Piper is Will Schuester, Baba Yaga is Sue Sylvester, and chaos ensues.

Glee Club Members:

Apple White: She joined because 1) she's good at singing 2) she genuinely enjoys singing 3) her mom was in the Glee Club and led them to winning Nationals. I'd say she's the Rachel Berry or the Quinn Fabray, but I'm not gonna do that thing where I entirely change a character's personality to make them fit into the role of another character...for the students anyway. Look, Apple's got enough drama in her life, she doesn't need me making her crazy enough to send someone to a crack house out of jealousy.

Raven: Uh, in the books Headmaster Grimm won't let her take Muse-ic because it's not an evil class. Luckily, because of a bizarre loophole in the school guidelines for competitive teams, Headmaster Grimm can't ban her from Glee Club. Everyone say thank you Giles.

Daring: He joined because he was told it would give him extra credit for the serenading skills portion of Advanced Wooing. Also, Apple asked him to join because they didn't have enough boys in the club and Daring's been trained to never ignore a request from a damsel.

Dexter: He’s there cause Raven’s there? And also cause he is a genuinely great singer and unlike Daring needs the Advanced Wooing extra credit? Also, I just kinda want him there.

Darling: Her mom made her join. Queen Charming really said “I’m gonna take a page from Snow White’s book and live vicariously through you, offspring of mine”.

Briar: She really likes the idea of a team competition where she won’t put her teammates in danger if she falls asleep. Also, she checked the competition rulebook, as long as they don’t all leave the stage when she has a narcoleptic episode they won’t be disqualified.

Humphrey: Every Glee AU needs a white-boy-who raps and Ever After High has one already built-in in the form of Humphrey Dumpty.

Maddie: She’s there cause Raven’s there. It’s utterly hattastic!

Kitty: She’s there because she remembered her mom talking about how some of her fondest memories of high school revolves around messing with the glee club, and Kitty wants dearly to be like her mother.

Lizzie: We’re completing the Wonderland ensemble. Lizzie joins because she needs an extra curricular and the Invisible Tree Situation has gotten so out of hand they had to disband the croquet team. Great voice, ngl.

Justine: Not the strongest singer in the room, but she’s capable of choreographing numbers like nobody’s business.

Meeshell: Listen, canon’s pretending her singing in that webisode was something amazing. So like, we’re pretending now too.

Duchess: I picture her as a Sugar Motta-type character. Cannot sing, massive diva, but they gotta put up with her cause her family’s donating to the club budget.

Melody: Listen, it’s her dad’s club. She can’t just not join. She’s banking those supportive daughter points for a rainy day.

Lawrence Bonecrusher III: Listen, I just it'd be funny if Professor Piper says the ever-insane "You're all minorities, you're in the glee club" line and there's the one orc student in the school just sitting there with his eyebrow raised. He's also the Matt of this AU. For some reason never speaks when in a scene.

Faybelle: Captain of the Cheerios, totally not here as part of a scheme by Madame Yaga to DESTROY THE GLEE CLUB!!!!

Nah, but seriously, this whole AU was born of me going "What EAH character would say the iconic 'I'm a closeted lesbian and a judgemental bitch' line?" and her face popped into my mind.

[rxttenfish]

gonna copy + paste some merfolk information i wrote on the other blog about how i write them because i like it

-

Honestly, while I do talk up merfolk and seeing merfolk as providing the same instinctual and automatic reaction and sensations as seeing a large predator much too close to you, and the deep fear that that provides — that is something that mainly applies to people who are less familiar with Miranda and, thus, less familiar with merfolk. People who are more used to Miranda and have acclimated to being around merfolk a lot wouldn't have that same reaction, or would only really have it in specific circumstances or when they are particularly thinking about it.

Mostly I talk about it a lot just because I'm interested in writing merfolk as truly inhuman, and it's one of those things that I have gripes over in xenofiction. Miranda's expressions aren't human, her body isn't human, none of her reactions are human, and that's a huge gap to try and cover between merfolk and humanoids! It really does feel more like you're talking to a particularly smart tiger, and she breaks a lot of the fundamentals of basic socialization for any other species! It's hard to get comfortable around her for the same reason people often have huge issues with anything that strays radically from the human facial plan or that they can't immediately sympathize with!

This is also the same reason why this starts to go away as people get closer to Miranda — not because she's any less of a merfolk or any more human, but because it's easier to automatically associate what she does with her moods and thoughts and her as a person. It's a degree of familiarity that starts to get so ingrained that it becomes subconscious, not just taught or learned but lived.

Think of it like the difference between someone who doesn't know anything about arthropods, and thus groups them all into "scary" and "frightening", and someone who has learned how to tell them apart, what the different species are and what their different body parts are, how to read their body language, how they move and what they do and how to behave around them. Even if the latter doesn't necessarily have more positive feelings about them, they still no longer possess that immediate jump of "this is not like me and I cannot understand or cope with that."

And, yes, this is why so often the narration and Miranda's actual emotional state or thoughts don't actually line up. Miranda might not think this as anything special and might be comfortable and relaxed, but not every muse will have the familiarity and understanding of her to realize it!

[magicanddaggers]

Announcement

I am officialy putting Gale and Astarion on low activity/highly selective status. There's only a few things both the boys are responding to regularly. I'm also gonna be purging my inbox because nothing in there is really speaking to me and I think cleaning things up will help a great deal with the overwhelmed anxiety I'm feeling over here.

What this means: I'm feeling burnt out and need to limit myself so that I don't lose the desire to continue one of my favorite hobbies. I still have muse for the boys here, it's just limited and I can't keep trying to write what isn't flowing for me. I'll probably be checking in on this blog two or three times a week and responding to things as I can find the muse until Gale and Astarion's voices grow strong again.

What this doesn't mean: I'm ignoring people on purpose or with ill intent, or that my struggle to continue our threads or start up interactions has any bearing on your writing/muses/ooc personality. This is a me thing, not a you thing.

I've been RPing online since I was 13 years old in CompuServe chatrooms and Yahoo!Groups when that was still a thing, and I'm 40 now. I know well enough when I need to step back and limit myself before I overwhelm/overstimulate myself and leave people disappointed, which just causes anxiety in me with my people pleasing ways.

If this means you don't want to continue things with me, that's fine. If you need to unfollow me for your comfort on your dash, that is fine too. I'd prefer a hardblock over a softblock, but if you softblock me and I see you on my dash without the mutual symbol I will likely unfollow as well (this doesn't count for sideblogs obviously since those don't really show up as mutual)

If you have questions about our stuff, please don't feel afraid to reach out. Either on Discord or IMs.

If you want to start something new with me, Tryckie Boi is very active and taking up the majority of my brainspace for writing at the moment. You can also find me on Wade and Logan over at @babyknifexworstlogan, who have their own Isekai-style BG3 verses. Activity there is still not as high as Tryck, but I am there more often than I am here these days.

Again, this is about me and my comfort and has no bearing on anyone else. I'll probably not be over here much on the weekend, we'll see how things go.

tl;dr - Limiting interactions over here and going to low-activity and highly selective status. It's a me thing not a you thing, please feel free to unfollow/block me for your comfort if you feel it necessary, no hard feelings.

[mrsnancywheeler]

Okay but like…two things…what if Billy hears Eddie call his muse “sunshine” for the first time, how dare he have a nickname like that for his muse.

OR if Billy ever walks in on his muse and Eddie kissing…

the way his facial features like straighten out and he shifts around with an, "excuse me?"

and before you can interject eddie's being a little smug with the whole thing, just a little look in his eye, "well everybody calls her something-"

"not everybody calls her that"

"not my fault she radiates light"

"but your words are, keep yourself in check, roundtree"

he does in fact not keep himself in check

OKAY this really depends on the time in their relationship where it's happening

if it's just in the midst of the years spent together, just another cycle of his bad moods and breakdowns, he's probably storming into a room to rant about something and just totally seething

"what the fuck, roundtree"

"billy-" and you're trying to interject but he's not letting you, he's already shoving eddie

"writing songs about my girl, waiting for us to fight and then, what? getting her to kiss you instead"

"weren't you just fucking one of your groupies, billy? strong talk from someone who can't keep it in his pants for 'his girl'"

billy's gone in for a punch when you're tearing at his shoulders, "billy, I'm sorry, just leave him alone, please" and you're frantic because things are devolving so fast.

billy's looking at you in disbelief, "and you, trying to get into the pants of the whole goddamn band. can't leave you alone for a second, so spoiled that you jump around. 'i wanna be your girl, billy. i want to be special, billy. i'm gonna go make out with your bassist.' the shit you pull, is insane"

and you're crying because you're scared this will be the last straw, but also because his hypocrisy is so frustrating. "billy-"

he's already whipped around to look at eddie, "stay the hell away from her"

and he's leading you out of the room and btw you're getting railed

but like if it's in the time of the tour, where they've already had the big ultimatum and this is his last chance. he's already failing and he knows that, so if he walks in then, he doesn't get angry because he knows it's his fault, he knows he can't get mad. so he's staring for a second, exhaling, and leaving the room. you follow him and he's just leaning up against the wall outside. you can tell he doesn't even want to acknowledge it and he just, "let's go look at the city, baby"

y'all I'm traveling, it's been super hectic I'm so sorry about the lack of content