#if there is something else its in spite of something
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not really sure how you could possibly be proud of America as a home country unless you are 1) delusional 2) racist or 3) really appreciative of chicken fried steak
#chip talks#my uncle looked me in the eyes and asked me genuinely if i loved this county#but as an arab american who grew up fresh off 9/11#i was 9 and getting called camel monkey#how can i be proud of such and ugly hateful machine im in debt slavery to beyond death?#i love my friends#and i love the ocean#and i love evergreens#and i love 24 hour diners#but its hard to find much else#if there is something else its in spite of something#i just dont know how you can love this place...#when everything is soaked in some one else's blood.
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Spite Loves...
#dragon age: veilguard#datv#Spite#spite dragon age#spite dellamorte#lucanis dellamorte#(adjacent)#Rook#zara renata#art: mine#I have had this sitting as a draft sketch / planned idea from like week 1 of veilguard release#back when I was still trying to grasp how to draw Lucanis / Spite#I'm glad I ended up setting it aside bc I'm so much more comfy with how to draw him now that it was sooo much easier#him and my rook tbh#honestly I am amazed I have not seen this meme for him yet???#is this meme old now?? am I old??? do the kids not know Ponyo Loves Revolution comic#(im joking but still amazed. if it's out there who ever else has made this joke your brain his huge and you're so smart)#I chose 'revenge' as I feel like I remember Mary specifically describing spite motivations re zara as revenge at some point...#im also so enamoured whenever people tag Spite as Spite Dellamorte... distinguished family member#anyway I'm glad to get this one off my list LOL it's been sitting in my procreate gallery taunting me for months#also wow 2 art posts in less than a week: i must be motivated or something :fingerguns:#tho its been a while since I've done a midnight art post and here we are again
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thinking about not only the specific people lucanis pulls in to represent the 'locks' in his psyche, but the storytelling that happens in the structure/order of them. the underlying ideas are presented something like:
the lucanis who went into the ossuary never came back out again; he died down there (the boy caterina raised is gone forever) -> you're putting yourself in danger doing this (by being close to me), you should leave because I can't bear it if you get hurt because of me -> it doesn't matter even if we do try this, it won't work anyway (again because of me) ('you know what he's like, you can open the door but he won't walk through it' :'( oofie doofie) -> what if the real secret is that there was never anything but the monster in here from the beginning. you should leave, there was never anything here worth saving in the first place. (implicitly: what if I deserved what happened, all along.)
it runs pretty cleanly from outward-oriented attachment anxiety ('caterina won't even want me back like this, she won't recognize me (the same way I no longer recognize myself)) and gradually deeper inwards until we reach self-image and self worth. or you know, the harrowing basic lack of it lol.
"careful -- they'll know we're not right," spite says in one of their first scenes... but clearly, some very deep part of lucanis has feared or suspected for much longer than that that there's something inherently not right at the core of him, way before any demon entered the picture. and the voice he gives those lines to is the person who should know him better than anyone in the world, who he has loved more than anyone in the world -- and who deliberately chose to hurt him so horrifically anyway. 'It's better if I'm just a monster and deserved what happened than it is to allow for the idea that the brother I love doesn't really exist and maybe never did'. it's better if he's fundamentally flawed in some way that needed fixing to help him survive, and that's why caterina chose to hurt him again and again -- out of love. (this one I think he might have a very sad wakeup call on one day if he ever ends up with the responsibility and care of a child of his own in some way and realizes just how alien the idea of ever intentionally hurting them for any reason is to him. oh buddy. also interesting that he keeps caterina as the outermost lock -- there IS a distance he keeps there that he hasn't with illario. he doesn't resent her 'anymore' he says, but he also keeps her carefully further away from his deepest self.)
as far as I could tell the only note in the mind prison that's fully hidden and needs to be uncovered is the sad painful helpless stupid little truth that even after all this, even knowing what happened... he still loves his brother. is there anything illario could ever do that would make lucanis completely stop loving him, do you think? sometimes the trouble with unconditional love is that it is, well. unconditional, even when some terms and conditions probably would have been in order haha.
that's the pattern you see there again and again; he would rather destroy and abandon and imprison himself at every turn than let go of love, even when it's just scraps, even when there's only ever enough of it to hurt him. it's only when rook shows up and as it were takes his hand and walks along with him that he can entertain the idea of changing the story of what walking out the door might mean in the end.
#tl;dr the demon is a metaphor about dissociation and trauma and it's doing its job thematically fucking pitch perfectly that way the end#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age meta#this mission is like ds9 the wire in terms of episodes you really can examine from a thousand different angles#and find something new and soulcrushingly sad every time. exactly my kind of episode in other words#whenever people say there's nothing to him but coffee and spite jokes some small part of me goes 'oh I'm so incredibly sorry!#it must be really hard and so impractical to go through life without being able to read :'( get better soon'#is that very nice of me. perhaps not. is the writing here *perfect*? of course not. but some people are also dedicated to being#wilfully blind (presumably b/c they would have preferred to see something else?? idk man)#lucanis' reaction to taash going 'I'm sorry I'm such a bad crow :'('... he could NEVER do what caterina did with him no matter what#you just can't use him like that. he needs the clean family/enemy/contract distinction or you just break him!!!#caterina literally what are you thinking. every day I ask myself this. (probably 'the only other option that keeps the seat in the family#is illario. so that's right out of course' lmao)#god forbid it happen anytime soon if it should happen b/c there's Stuff that needs working through first lol but he'd be such a soft dad
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that 'continuing out of spite' shit really don't work with depression like its just over man I don't know
#Obligatory disclaimer that this one isnt about killing myselfffff its about art and improvementtttttt#'i dont let the self doubt and insecurity stop me i keep going in spite of that' good for you man sigh#why couldnt i just be an athlete like my parents no one else in this family does art why me (u_u)#but the thing is if i quit i go insane but if i continue i also go insane I CANT WIN#i sound and feel so bitter but...what am i doing wrong it doesnt feel good to see myself so behind#and im gonna stop typing because this will very easily spiral into something else#it doesnt matter now that ive vented about it ill draw something maybe even 2-3 somethings that look really nice and ill reset thats how#this usually tends to go#*puts head thru the wall*#kae.txt
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WE UP POSY POSTING RAHH



ponynatural Harper I have big plans for you
Okok the Ghoul is bigger than it should be compared to Sam but I will scale later lmao
#supernatural#ponynatural#mlpnatural#sam winchester#jack kline#harper sayles#eileen leahy#also a homunculous#technically its called something else but its basically a fucked up shitty bird thing#harper named it jackie out of spite bc she made it to try to kill jack#problem is#its small and stupid#miscellaneous#sketch#artist#art#artist on tumblr#sketches#sketch dump#my art
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"mike is Just a useless bumbling idiot"
#ik most of the time we're joking about this but#i mean.#mike IS an idiot (hes 15 be so fr) but he is smart too yknow and we cant take that away#its such an important distinction for me#the uselessification of mike wheeler is something that can be so annoying#hello. do you know that he's just as valuable to the supernatural plot as dustin or nancy or anyone else who makes plans#and in terms of like. relationships. he is in such a precarious position SHAKING YOU ALL BY THE SHOULDERS#HE IS TRYING HIS BEST#he's being lied to left right and center and hes lying too you can understand why it looks like hes bad at communication#he's not!! he just needs a minute!!! he can sort this out!!#i will die on my little hill and nobody can stop me.#ik this will flop but i must say it#ok done. send tweet.#feeling pretty spiteful today. ahem#mike wheeler#byler
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#overthinking a shitty interaction fromna few days ago#ppl talking about me in the notes as if I wasnt there#someome said 'why is he being so familiar?'#i was talking like i normally talk. going for generally empathetic and understanding with an amount of snark bc they were being rude#i shouldnt have engaged to begin with but I was like oh i have good proof to refute this nonsense claim#forgot for a hot second that with some people its about their enotions and what they want to do with it and not. facts#nit like problemnsolving rather than listening it was a bullshit trans discourse claim based on very little of substance#and now im like. why was I so “familiar”?#i dont think I was overly familiar. idk if they were upset I wasnt rising to their bait and being aggressive so they could fight me#such a weird thing#also ran across a pill that makes you green comic with one of those guys who divert conversations like why are you trans im worried about#your mental health must be causing your transness friendo buddy bud my bestie#i dont think I was doing that#they were also really grasping at straws to misinterpret me which I think means I did a decent job being kind#im just spinning about it bc sleep is really eluding me#i should just forget about it#why is he so familiar?? am i supposed to talk like a formal fedora mlady dude?? am I just expected to be an aggressive asshole?#interact like its a legal proceeding??#i have no idea#hopefully now ive got it out i can think about something else#bc it was a totally ffuitless cinversation except as a reminder to not get involved in absurd and spiteful discourse!#tbh a bunch of recentish pills that make you green was making me uncomfortable but the metaphor is abstract enough that I cant logic through#where my disagreement is. just the vibes were kinda of....exclusionary? in ways I cant fully out my finger on?#im just q bit sad disappointed is all cause I have liked them before#i need to find something to do. if youve got this far can you reccomend me a good sleep podcast? doesnt need to be A Sleep Podcast TM#just white noise basically to keep my brain busy that doesnt matter if I only hear pieces of it#have a good one ❤#mine
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people who lack nature awareness or are flat out willingly ignorant of environmental crisis repulse me. i find the approach vegans make pretty hostile but meat eaters have a far worse attitude. when they talk about how much they love to eat it i get this mental image of watching them eat like a pig getting food all over the place and breathing heavily, unaware of the mess theyre making that someone else will have to clean up after them. no manners nor do they have any shame that will make them get some
#and theyre proud of it too#theyre so passionate that i get confused whether its the 1900s or 2025 and few years away from shit hitting the fan#i get eating it ocassionally because you lack vitamins that can only be found in meat#but if u are perfectly capable of affording a vegan lifestyle yet choose not to u are beyond saving#redneck barbarian 'i do what i want; someone else will take care of the consequences" ass mentality#i think its time to put aside your self best interest and focus on this one ans only earth you have#whose nurturing and taking care of will be in your best interest anyway. because u live here?#some ppl are petty and have this Im gonna eat meat anyway bc i hate vegans and hope they die behavior too.. it will get u good 1 day#u think ur doing something extraordinary by acting like a spiteful 5 year old but ur just digging ur own grave
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Day 130 | id in alt
I have no idea how Fushiguro dosent stumble over himself and so I made him do it.
Also Kugisaki I saw her run fast as hell girl was basically skipping.
#dailykugisaki#jjk#kugisaki nobara#fushiguro megumi#inumaki toge#Inumaki watching Fushiguro eat shit is funny as hell to specifically me#i have two nice ideas simmering rn#on a heavier note. if anybody EVER refers to whats going on right now as something “political” and not genocide. beat the fuck outta them#privileged assholes are showing themselves more frequently like worms after fresh rain its abysmal#now thats done with#I PERSONALLY THINK KUGISAKI IS PRETTY DAMN FAST#Fushiguro is not he enhances his speed and friction with the ground via shadows thats why he kinda does that#Kugisaki is fast as fuck based on pure spite and hatred for being spun around like a toy#She'll kill panda for that trust me. punt him like a damn football#shes extremely good at manipulating cursed energy its fucking canon so i imagine she knows how to like course that shit through her body ex#ez*#not a master but the best one outta.... basically all the students(not including the third years bc idk where to put them) low-key#she knows her shit#im tired of people saying she dosent know her shit she DOES#She is able to fucking float her nails! i aint seen anybody else float shit on will other than gojo bitch!! SHE IS HER#gojo i know you said Itadori was supposed to be one of those students to surpass you but look at Kugisaki im begging your white haired ass#ive made two au's and man making Kugisaki a witch and Maki an elderitch god and gojo a weird ass vessel n shit#and then the other au is Kugisaki as a fucked up robot and Maki as an angeo of judgement what the fuck am i cooking#bucket is fucking tweaking
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what motivates certain men into wanting to be the most disliked person in history exactly?
#have you just given up and are committing to the bit or something?#there is nothing in you but resentment and spite.#i think you should figure that out instead of inflicting suffering on everyone else just bc they dont like you#theres always ways to try to fix that and step one would be to ground yourself by giving a way a good portion of your money#which you refuse to do hence why your soul remains poisoned. sad!#this situation is entirely on you to fix and the only way to fix it is by getting rid of the money. its making you sick.
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one of my top 10 hobbies has to be getting added to a large group chat and then people forgetting i am there.
#my ex just admitted in front of everyone and the eyes of god that she has not gotten any since we broke up#in spite of trying really hard to get. anything. and talking about how she desperately needs to get dicked down. GIRL. what.#responded to the message with R I P in letter emojis uhm. i dont think anyone will even#notice tbh but its funny to me. personally.#funniest thing is i kinda knew that this was happening but im like well now i have confirmation from the source i guess lol#HONORABLE MENTION OF ANOTHER SITUATION IN THIS GENRE: my friend is a dancer#with a really competitive dance group and she's in a small group of like 13 people who she#interacts with every day and she had a sort of falling out with them thats too complicated to get into here.#but before the falling out they added her to a shared photo album. and right before she decided she was done with the whole thing#she woke up one morning to a notification saying that there were 50+ new photos added to the shared album#and thats how she found out they did a holiday party where they invited everyone but her... BATSHIT. and shes like holy shit#thats petty. and made a whole game of going through the photos with me and some other frieinds.#ballet drama is something else let me tell you holy shit#cricket.chatterbox
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sits here thinking about all the fic ideas i have for my durge and isobel and punches a hole in the drywall because i have unmedicated Cant Focus Disorder
#dirge being the one who autopsied isobel and opened her tomb with gortash and kethetic.#dirge being forced to take a day off because of brain damage induced chronic migraines and staying at the elf song with isobel#while aylin and the gang keep on top of shit for the day. just quiet moments alone for them to talk to each other without the pressure#of being overheard#isobel talking to dirge about being a bhaalspawn. her experiences with an immortal god being#aylin being trapped and the unique vulnerabilities of being godspawn#isobel and dirge finding catharsis in their brutal resurrections into new life through each other. autopsy buddies.#isobel being Kind Of Weird and not entirely a saint because shes lost everything and everyone. and finally met a kindred soul who-#-understands what shes been through and she isnt willing to give that up even though hes a bhaalspawn murderer.#the willingness to be selfish because she cant stand to lose anything else when shes just starting to get it all back#isobel the light in the darkness. isobel the deathtouched maiden.#how loviatar says that the gods cant feel pain so she seeks it out through her worshippers so they can appreciate being alive#in spite of their mortality. a feeling a god can never have on their own#how isobel attracts the divine and unkillable and immortal#there is something so unabashedly human in how she lives and dies and lives again and how she suffers and lives and rejoices#and it draws them like moths to a light. she will never experience the bone deep satisfaction of doing what you were made for#because she wasnt MADE for ANYTHING she just LIVES. she just chooses.#aylin is always her mothers sword and dirge is always his fathers knifehand and isobel just is. invested with the soft light of the moon-#-because it radiates out from her anyways. gentle and without judgement it alights on them all#she just Is. human mortal kind gentle hypocritical and steadfast and they will never know what its like to be blessed without being claimed#like she never knows what its like to have such perfect divine purpose etched into your being and so they cant help but linger#god. fucking. isobel thorm#they watch trashy hallmark romcoms together btw. in my immaculate vision of bg3 which is totally accurate
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Alright soooo you've mentioned that the monster in your AU have enhanced senses (sight, smell, hearing, etc.) And you've mentioned that different monsters might have different enhancements on their senses depending on what type of monster they are, but do the differnt versions of the skeletons have different enhancements to their senses?
Like would Wine have different capabilities with his 5 senses than he would with Blue, who is another version of himself?
Or would they be pretty much the same??
Does this make sense!? I'm so sorry I'm terrible at wording things in a way other people will understand😭😭
It makes sense, don't worry! This is such a great question as well!
For the senses, no, all the skeletons are the same. That's just how their subspecies is so it's all the same!
However, depending on the skeleton (and monsters in general), their magic (remember, magic is weird and adapts to the world around it) gives them lil special enhancements.
For example (I'll use Blue and Wine for simplicities sake) Wine sometimes just picks up on things and events a few moments (sometimes minutes, sometimes seconds) before they happen. Coffee's the only person that can wiggle his way around it, mostly because Wine gets a strange distant look on his skull, or he speaks slightly differently, and Coffee's the only one able to even notice that Wine's being strange (let alone that he's about to predict/be aware of the future).
With Blue, his underground was one of the nicest, so his magic didn't need to adapt to be able to do the same things Wine's does (or any of the others for that matter). Blue's a sweetheart, so his main thing is healing. He really does just want to be helpful. Though, Blue's got a lot of energy on top of that, so his healing magic would feel different from someone else's! He's also one of the few monsters who can make healing food with ease!
These enhancements aren't related to the fact that their skeletons at all, just that their monsters. Their smell and hearing is specific to their subspecies, but not their enhancements. Some monsters have them, some don't, it just depends! I hope this all answers your question, lol.
Sorry if I've over explained anything, but thank you for inciting the info dump with such a wonderful question. I hope I see you pop up again soon! 😊☕️
#the food thing#i have something to add but if i put it up there then this whole post would be so fucking long#YES they can cook#the lazy ones? meh#the excitable ones? yes absolutely#the excitable ones USED to suck at cooking#they dont anymore#mostly because im fully of the belief that the 6 of them would NOT let it slide if some elses food is awful#blue n pap would obviously be the only ones nice abt it but they definitely get berrated for their less than ideal cooking practices#Wine always has known how to cook#same w black#vi doesnt fuck w cooking very often but sometimes him and blue will bake something#and black will eat it (to spite blue)#edge? sucked#pap? sucked even worse#dont get me started on blue#he cant cook any meals its just baking#coffee has an enhancement too#its mentioned quite frequently actually#i dunno if its been noticed by any of the readers tho#i shall keep it to myself until someone asks incase of spoilers LMAO#something good#something good asks#something strange#something good headcanons#something good spoilers#coffee fellswap gold#papyrus/original characters#papyrus/reader#coffee-crazy
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wtvr. i ate some crepes
#everybody else was gone except my mom so i just. ate in silence#it sucked. they were good but like. the crepes r nice bc its like the only time we eat together and we usually dont fight#but i ruined the whole thing#and then when i was on my last plate lamp asked if my dad was 'allowed back in' bc he was worried he was upsetting me#i never said he wasnt allowed back in he didnt even fucking. he wasnt involved in it anyway#i judt feel like such a fucking awful person#and he didnt even come back in after i said yes but i was in my last crepe so i came back into my room#but hes gonna think i left just so i didnt hsve to be near him and thats. not it i. i was hoping hed come out so i could clear it up and sa#ty for the crepes#but i just look like a stupid ungrateful piece of shit now so. whagever#i texted him 2 say thanks and that the crepes were good so .#feels weird i never text him first#and when he texts me its usually just like. cmere. so its weird to text him#but i feel so horrible abt like. all of it.#but the spiteful part of me is like Yes sorry that i had a ptsd moment . if only there was something you all couldve done . so that i would#not have ptsd. Oh well ! things are as they are. but thats me being whiny and its my fault for like. all of it. idk
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thinking about getting a little too drunk w husband!simon…
he’s already a super possessive guy, but your drunken antics are only making it ten times worse.
sure, coming to the bar was his idea. it was only fair, after such a long week at work, that he got to have a nice dinner on the town and a few beers shortly after. even better that he got to do it with his pretty fucking wife, you know?
yeah, he watched you slip into the tightest, smallest dress you had, curl your hair into pretty little coils, and push and pull at everything else out of place. he saw the too tall black pumps you choose— the one’s he got you for your anniversary that make your legs look model-length long. he even saw the way your black lace bralette played peek-a-boo along your dress’s neckline.
all of it only made him more excited.
getting to show you off on the town? his sweet, sexy little woman all done-up and pretty, hanging off his arm like his little trophy? god, he was practically hard before you two could reach the front door.
the second that liquor hit your system, though, was the second all hell broke loose.
at this point in the night, you’re long past the idea of sitting pretty, eating your food, and posing for pictures. now, you’re feeling good. a little tipsy, or maybe even drunk. all the shyness or docile little feelings from the beginning of the night are gone.
now, you wanna dance. you wanna throw your arms up and sway with the other bar-goers, and why shouldn’t you be able to?
you didn’t mind the way your dress rode up your thighs, giving the wrong people an eyeful of your goods. you hadn’t noticed the men who’d run their hands over you, every so often passing by with their crotch just a little too close to your ass. all you were focused on was the music, how good you felt, and when your next shot was coming.
if only you had paid attention to the damn near menacing stare simon had you under. something that rivaled a madman’s with its intensity.
he’d held back for the first few songs, letting the angel on his shoulder telling him to ease up guide him. sure, he still stood around like an unamused body guard, sending glares to the gawking men and buying your drinks whenever you asked. maybe occasionally he’d get a cute picture or video of you too. that was just what came with the simon o’riley type though.
it wasn’t until you got to the flirty territory, grinding your ass into him with the music or kissing him with a little too much tongue, that he decided to pull the plug.
and god, did you always give him attitude for it.
“i’m not ready to leave, simon,” you’d whine, eyes glossed over and face screwed up in that cute little way you only do when you’re aggravated.
“i want another drink,” but you’re slurring and stumbling already.
“just keep kissing on me, baby,” you protest as he grabs your discarded shoes and purse and starts leading you towards the exit.
he’s sweet with you at first, given how drunk and cute you truly are. sure, you may have triggered his possessiveness early, but you’re batting your eyelashes up at him and clinging onto him for dear life. how could he not talk to you softly? how could he not kiss you back as he tugged your dress back down?
“it’s alright, lovie. let’s get home and i’ll take such good care of you.”
you start trying to fight him though and you’ll see how thin his patience truly is.
doing things out of spite? pulling his hands away from you while he’s trying to guide you down the street? arguing with him through your half-coherent sentences? cursing him under your breath just loud enough that he can hear it?
you’re getting yourself in trouble and you’re too drunk to know it.
he was prepared to let your little outbursts slide. wouldn’t hold it against you and still keep his plans straight for the night.
after all you’d done, he was still gonna get you home, slip off those stockings and undo those zippers. dedicate the rest of the night to making you feel all good like how you’d begging him too.
but you just can’t keep that pretty little mouth shut, can you?
“don’t make it worse for yourself.” he’d warn, grabbing your face from its resting place against his passenger-side window, “you’ve already fucked up enough as is, yeah?”
his voice is gruff and his jaw is set, but his eyes don’t leave yours for a second.
you’ll be making it up to him all night long, and he’s gonna be anything but nice now ;)
#simon riley x you#simon riley smut#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley cod#simon ghost riley#simon riley#mxf smut#smut#drinking#obsessed lover#obsessed!simon
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thats how you can tell that they're medic mains <3<3<3
Remade because I forgot to extend the poll to 1 week lol
Feel free to add context in replies/tags!
I'm nosy and want to know your hours and reasons!
#im a secondary medic main bc hes easy asf and can turn the tide almost immediately. dont pretend hes a hard class#just dont get headshot and dont get backstabbed and pocket the top 3 powerclasses#im being redundant for laughs btw. but like#ive got beef thats grown over the last year or so with medic mains#i know a few who are cracked at medic because their game sense is incredible and their judgement matches it#but i know medic mains that havent played for long feel wayyyy too important (because i did when i started and i still do lol)#its also often that medic mains fully misunderstand what other classes need from them and why#my pet peeve is seeing people act as if hearing people spam E is traumatizing or annoying.#dawg look them in the eye and hit a killbind if you REALLY want to spite them lmfao#also just ignoring people works too#(also not a joke: check if youve got the option that auto-calls for medic on. sometimes ppl got it on without realizing)#second pet peeve: when medic mains complain about soldiers and demos jumping after you heal them#if you played anything else than medic or at least attempted to understand the gameplay of the classes you heal#youd know that soldiers especially benefit from rocket jumping because the maneuverability it offers is a massive advantage#youd know that theyll COME BACK for healing with low HP aka: FASTER. UBER. BUILD.#just stay with your teammates while hes off#same with demos#and for gods sake. pocket the demo when theres a sentry.#by god play something else than medic. hes useful it feels good and you are usually helpful even when doing mediocre.#but you can do much better if you know what its like to be the pocketed. im just saying#anyway. put away that ubersaw. youre so sensitiv- [gets stabbed a hundred times by a horde of medic mains]
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