#if the author liked being subtle even a little bit instead of feeling like they needed to spell out everything...
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leojurand · 3 days ago
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you need so much brain power to read dunnett in part because you're constantly trying to figure out why characters are doing whatever the fuck they're doing. this information will not be presented to you in a clear and concise way. sometimes the characters themselves don't even know the reason they're doing those things, so you have to figure out things that are hidden from you by the author, and from the character because repression/self-denial/trauma/etc. sometimes they know exactly why they're doing all of that, but they have so much more information than you do, so you're at a disadvantage still. if you're lucky you'll be following a character who is honest and open about their feelings... but this is a dorothy dunnett novel so those characters are 1 out of a 100.
and i wouldn't have it any other way!! i can imagine how these books would be written by someone who didn't love subtlety as much, or someone who didn't trust their readers enough. they'd be so, so much worse, that's for sure
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gracieheartspedro · 1 year ago
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Who We Are
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pairing: fem!reader x dbf!joel miller
description: when your father falls ill, his patrol partner and best friend, joel miller finds a way to aid in his recovery. but this solution is complicated and requires you to take on a week-long hunt for supplies and resources. being stuck on the road with an older guy you've been crushing on for ages won't be so bad, right? wrong. because he's been pining after you, too. and one of you will have to give in evenutally.
word count: 17k words. this one is a LONG ONE. get a snack.
warnings: MINORS DNI! this is 18+, post!outbreak joel, age gap (reader is in her 30s, joel is in his mid 50s), i don't describe the reader all that much, consumption of alcohol, illness that requires medical intervention, blood, guns, killing of infected, forced proximity, joel is kinda pervy?, talks of loss of family members, joel lies about his past, oral (f receiving), face sitting, unprotected p in v, overstimulation, dirty talk, creampie, after care.
author's note: ... hi folks! this one is a long one, so like I said, grab a snack and get comfy! I was going to make this multiple parts but I'm eager and unhinged. to be honest, this story is better as one big one shot anyway. I had a very intense time editing so I know I probably missed some things. I may write little branch off stories if you guys enjoy it enough. anyway, enjoy! <3 lemme know what you think!
“Didn’t know you were workin’ tonight, darlin’,” Your father’s Southern drawl brings you out of your daze. You had been cleaning glasses for the last hour and a half. Surprisingly, the Tipsy Bison wasn’t busy on a Wednesday night. You had been keeping busy by cleaning and serving two visitors. 
You look up, noticing your father and his patrol partner wander into the bar. They find a seat at the bar, right in front of you as you dry some whiskey glasses. 
“I work every night this week, Pops,” You mutter, turning back to the liquor bottles to grab his favorite bourbon. You knew exactly what he came here for. He wanted to pester you on your shift and watch you write under his partner’s gaze. He thought your little crush was entertaining. You have made comments to your dad in the past about how you thought Joel was nice to look at and your Dad would just laugh. He would jokingly wiggle his finger at you and tell you to find someone your age. 
Little do you and your father know, Joel feels similarly about you. The first moment he saw you, he thought about how if he was a young buck, he’d lock you down as soon as he could. The age held him back initially, never even entertaining your subtle glances or welcoming smiles. Then when he realized who your father was, he immediately shut down all thoughts like that in his head. You were strictly off-limits.
“Well good, keeps you busy.”
You did not enjoy the idea of working every weeknight with a bunch of drunks, but this job was a bit better than constantly shoveling horse shit. Instead, you got to mingle with the locals. Maybe find yourself a man, since you were in your early thirties and unmarried.
Joel loved coming to the Bison when you were here. It meant he got to drink a whiskey neat and watch you twirl and rush around the bar. Tonight was slower, though, so he got the privilege of speaking with you, which was rare. 
You pour your Dad his bourbon, finally glancing up at his partner who’s practically ogling at you. You made a conscious effort to avoid his piercing brown eyes. 
Joel Miller was a dream boat, god damn. Every time he glanced in your direction, you would freeze up and stutter out a very jumbled “hello”. He was quite guarded, never much to talk. When he did finally speak, you found yourself reeling over his deep voice. 
“Whatcha want, Mr. Miller?”
His lips twinged, his eyes flicking up to yours. He loves hearing you say that, he thinks to himself.  You hand off the bourbon to your Dad, waiting for a response. 
“Whatever he’s having is fine, sweetheart,” He says plainly, nodding toward the half-empty bottle. Your knees could buckle at the nickname, but you keep your composure. You can’t crumble that easily. 
You three slide into a conversation about their patrolling, what they found that day, and the game plan for tomorrow. You make a sly comment about how they needed to find some meaning in life other than patrol. Your dad laughs, and Joel just stares blankly at you. You instantly want to take back the comment and never speak again, ever. Instead, you just continue drying the glasses you just washed. 
When your dad finished his bourbon, you noticed his expression change from relaxed to pained. 
“You okay there?” You ask, grabbing his glass and placing it in the sink below the counter. He rubs his chest, letting out a deep guttural cough. Joel looks perplexed while you get closer and notice the blood splattering into your dad’s palm. 
“It’s nothing, just a cough,” He manages to say, his voice hoarse. You scan his face, knowing immediately that he’s lying.
“Bullshit, you’re coughing up blood,” You reach towards some towels, tossing them on the counter in front of him, “You should probably go get checked out, Dad.”
Joel quips, “Yeah, don’t need you getting sick when we are out tomorrow. Why don’t you stop by the infirmary before you go home?”
Your Dad just shakes his head, “You two are being dramatic. It’s nothing, I promise.”
Your Dad was known for downplaying his pain and sicknesses. You remember being a little girl traveling with him across the country and every time he got hurt, he’d just suck it up. He shattered his left pinky years ago and he resolved to just chop it off. So that’s what he did. He was lucky it never got infected. But he was known just to blow off all his ailments, reminding you he’s beat all the other odds. 
So instead of fighting with him, you just nod all the while, stealing a long glance at Joel. He’s finishing his drink and you can’t help but watch his neck. His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows and you fixate on it for a bit too long. 
You’re brought out of the trance when he slams the glass down, his dark brown eyes drooping. Joel always looked tired, but you knew after the day they had, he was actually tired. 
You had a couple more hours at the Bison before you had to close up, so you bid them a farewell, reminding your Dad that you’d be home before he stumbles off to bed. He never slept much, he would just read in the living room until you got home usually. 
Joel waves you a farewell, thanking you quietly for the drink. 
“Don’t be a stranger,” You say as he turns his back to you to head for the door. He turns a bit, giving you a slight smirk as he reaches for the door. 
You spend the rest of your shift daydreaming about what it’d be like to be with a man. You spent most of your time in Jackson without giving much of the men your age a thought. More than half were taken, anyway. While you let your mind wander, you realize your imagination is placing Joel in the spot of all the made-up situations with this said man. 
-
You lock the bar door behind you, tugging on it to ensure it’s snug in the latch. The air was shifting, the cool warm summer turning into a slightly chilly fall. You wore a long sleeve today, luckily, or else you’d be shivering on your way home. The walk home wasn’t a long one. 
When you reach your front door, you realize the living room light is on. Dad’s awake.
But as you reach to turn the knob, you hear ghastly breathing from the other side. When you swing the door open, you see your Dad in his recliner, his hand over his chest. He’s dry heaving, trying to get out a cough. 
“Hey, hey,” You quickly race to his side, “Are you okay? What’s happening?”
He breathes in deeply, “I just can’t seem to catch my breath. Something isn’t right.”
You have never seen him so panicked. You nod, understanding that your next step is to get him to the infirmary. He should have gone on his way home. You didn’t know if anyone would be there and you surely didn’t know if they would be able to treat his symptoms. 
“Are you in pain?” You ask, grabbing under his arms to lift him out of his chair. He’s wobbly, so you keep your hand under his armpit and use your other free arm to balance him. He shakes his head. 
“Just weak.”
Your heart sinks. Never in your life has your father admitted to feeling weak or sick. It was like as soon as he got home, his body just gave out. You help him into his shoes and start your trek back towards the middle of town. You wish you didn’t have to walk him so far because it felt like with every 5 feet, his lungs were giving out and sending him into a coughing fit. You probably woke the entire town trudging him through the streets. When you get to the front step of the infirmary, you knock as loud as you can. Usually, they had an overnight shift nurse helping, having them watch over whoever was dragged there during the day. Dispensing medicine if need be. You knew a couple of the nurses, most of them your age or a bit older. 
When a familiar face opens the door, you feel a sense of relief. 
“Hey Sidney,” You greet her, sort of pushing your Dad into the room, still keeping your hands wrapped around his center, “Something’s wrong with Pops.”
She reaches out to help you with him, “Oh no, what’s going on?”
“Can hardly breathe,” Is all he can muster out. You look at Sidney, concern spread across your face. She nods, knowingly. 
Sidney was one of the nurses you trusted the most. She gave you stitches when you sliced your hand open on a glass bottle a couple of weeks ago. She was patient and gentle, always checking to see if you were doing alright as she sewed your skin together. She’s a former Firefly, probably in her 40s. She got trained by some doctors years ago so she knew a decent amount about all sorts of medical treatment. 
She takes hold of the situation completely, grabbing your Dad and walking him to a free bed near the door. She gets him to lie down and she starts scrambling for some supplies to do a quick once over of him. He looks pale and for some reason, very small, in the hospital bed. 
“It’s gonna be alright,” You say, poking his arm. You say it for him, but you mainly say it for yourself. He closes his eyes and nods. 
“Always is, kiddo.”
-
The news was not ideal. After observation and some tests, Sidney decided your father probably has pneumonia. The problem was, that Jackson was low on antibiotics and they would have to decide if your Dad’s case was urgent enough to give him some. 
It pissed you off, but you had to hold back your anger. This situation was out of Sidney’s control, but you knew exactly who to raise your voice to. Sadly, the city council was asleep in their beds, as it was 4 a.m. Sidney reassured you that she would ensure your father was looked after until the morning when they could discuss with everyone if it would be okay to give him some of the highly sought-after antibiotics. 
But for now, you should get some rest. 
Your father fussed at you while he was in and out of sleep, telling you that you needed to go home and sleep. Your body was plagued with exhaustion and your brain was hardly functioning. You would need to plead a good case, so even a couple of hours of sleep would do you good. You ask if you could occupy a bed nearby and Sidney agrees with a sympathetic smile. You curl up, trying to clear your brain of your racing thoughts. 
You can’t lose your father, he’s all you have. 
You need to remind the council of all your father does. 
You need him to get better. 
You need him. 
-
“We only have 4 vials of antibiotics,” Maria states, trying not to look you in the eyes. She feels horrible, but she knows deep down the rest of the council will probably reject your father using any. It was going to be a tough decision like this that made most of the people in the council think they were playing God, but it was real life. Would they give your 60-something-year-old father antibiotics for pneumonia or give it to a young child suffering from an infection? They had to think ahead and supplies were scarce. 
You cross your arms, waiting for the next shoe to drop. “And?”
Tommy stands up, knowing you will not like the next sentence. He practically guards Maria with his broad frame. He resembled Joel, with his dark hair and stern eyes. His were a bit softer. 
“We are low on resources, hun. We need to think ahead and ensure that the pros outweigh the cons of giving him one of those vials. You understand?”
“Why was this not a thought in the summer? When it was a good time to go seek some out? I just don’t under-”
“We had that sickness going around over the summer. Lots of people getting fevers. Before we knew it, Dr. Peters realized we were low. I had intentions to get out and try to find more, and trade with some people, but we just haven’t discussed it all yet. There’s a process. It was in the works.”
Your blood is boiling and your patience running out. Each second of arguing was another second your Dad could be closer to death. 
“Well, it’s a shitty fuckin’ process. Where can I go to get more, then? Is there another community we can trade with? A hospital we can scavenge? You guys can’t expect me to sit around and wait for him to get worse.”
Maria looks to Tommy, trying to wrack her brain for a response. Tommy’s lip twitches, knowing exactly what to say. He did not want you to do it, but he knew how you were. You’d do anything for your family. 
“There’s a hospital in Salt Lake that I’ve heard is practically untouched. Fireflies used to reside there and do tests. They probably left behind some supplies.”
You narrow your eyes, “Salt Lake? Isn’t that a whole week away?” 
You start to pace the room, trying to console yourself. You can’t just leave for that long and assume that everyone will take care of your Dad. Tommy places his hands on his hips, trying to figure out a resolution. He liked your Dad, always going to him if he needed help around the commune. Your Dad is always one to offer a helping hand and give solid advice. He didn’t want to watch him die, either. 
“How about this,” Tommy huffs, “How about we give him one of our vials and you and Joel head out to Salt Lake to scavenge that hospital? If we are right in our assumptions, there’s probably a lot of resources there. And Joel’s been there before.”
“Why are you roping Joel into this?” You press, crossing your arms. 
“Joel knows where to go. He can get you there in one piece.”
“Where am I going,” Joel’s presence takes you by surprise. You turn back at the front door of the infirmary, seeing Joel’s disheveled hair sticking up in every direction. He had red cheeks, probably from the jog he did to get there. As soon as he heard about your father, he booked it from the stables to his side. 
Tommy shoots Joel a knowing look, “You and her are gonna go back to Salt Lake. You think they have antibiotics at that hospital you took Ellie to?”
Joel’s visceral reaction sends you. His heart practically stopped when Tommy brought up the hospital. 
You start to sweat when he does, realizing you would have to travel that far with Joel Miller. 
He swallows, shifting his weight to his other leg. “Probably. Why can’t ya just give him what we have?”
Maria shakes her head at his response, “We have a long winter ahead of us, Joel. We have four vials left. This saves us from a council meeting where they shoot down everything. They won’t approve it. If I reassure them that you are going to get some more, they won’t mind if we give him one.”
He huffs, scratching his chin in contemplation. You knew this would not be ideal for him, but you’re willing to do anything, even if you had to do it alone. The four of you stand in silence while Joel wracks his brain for an excuse to say no. None comes to him. 
It’s not that he did not want to help you, he just does not want to relive some trauma with you by his side. He would have to swallow back all his emotions, all the while you would be posted up right next to him. He does not want you to see him falter under pressure.
“She can’t go alone, Joel,” Tommy quips, gesturing towards you. You were shaking, your body reacting before your brain even could. Your nerves were shot.
He shakes his head, “And if they don’t have the supplies?”
You didn’t even think that far. 
“They will,” Tommy says, matter-of-factly, “It’s our best bet. The Fireflies disbanded, there has to be stuff left behind.”
You don’t know how Tommy knows all this, but he must have good sources to know all these things. Joel nods at him, accepting his response. He looks back at you, trying to figure out how you feel about the proposition by reading your face. 
“Does that work for you?” His deep voice isn’t meant to be intimidating, but you flinch anyway at the question. 
“I don’t have much of a choice. My Dad needs the medicine. If you guys think we can make it there and back in one piece, I’ll do it.”
“We will leave tomorrow morning. In the meantime,” Joel waves over Sidney, who’s still sitting by your sleeping and dazed father, “Give him one of those vials.”
-
Joel sacrificing his time and effort for your father was unfathomable to you. Sure, Joel was a great friend of your Dad’s, but he truly didn’t owe you two anything. It made you enamored with him even more. 
As the day shifted into the evening, you sat by your Dad’s bed and waited for the antibiotics to kick in. His body needed rest, you knew that much because he slept more than he probably ever had in his lifetime. 
He was sweating out a fever, so every so often you’d pat his head with a cold rag. He would mumble a quiet “thank you” and then return to snoring. As the sun sets, you welcome Sidney back for her night shift. She checked your Dad’s vitals, telling you his lungs are already sounding a bit better. You stretch and yawn, cracking every bone in your body while you do. You were stuck in the same position for so long, elbows on your knees, your chin propped up by your hands. 
You had a long trip ahead of you, and you couldn’t lie, you were scared half to death. You did not want to come back and find your father dead. You were also terrified about going back outside of Jackson. You spent most of your last 20 years living in the wild and shitty QZ’s. You were always on edge out there, and then you found Jackson. Ever since then, life has been a little more hopeful. You were able to form relationships and have some simple enjoyment, after all this time. 
Your Dad finally wakes up when you start stirring more. His one eye opens first which makes you crack a smile. 
“Mornin’ Pops,” You joke, grabbing his warm hand, “That antibiotic should start working soon. You’ll be better in no time.”
“Yeah,” He croaks, “But I heard you’re going somewhere.”
You bite your lip, afraid to stress him out. You knew he would worry about you, he always did.  
“Yeah, me and Joel are going to get more supplies. Nothing too drastic,” You lie, brushing your thumb over his scarred knuckles, “You trust Joel enough to take care of me?”
It was the first time he laughed in the last 24 hours, “Course he will. He knows how much you mean to me. If he fucks up, he will get a load of me, that’s for sure.”
His voice was reassuring to hear, especially since he’s joking with you. 
“Okay, I believe you,” You mutter, “We leave tomorrow morning, so I need you to be good and get all the rest you can. I want you up and moving when I get back, you hear me?”
“Roger that, kiddo.”
-
“Mornin’ sunshine,” Your tone is sarcastic and Joel can tell. You did not expect to be stuck with Joel Miller alone for a week, especially outside the walls. 
He clears his throat as he finishes packing up his horse. 
“Mornin’,” He grumbles, patting his horse’s mane, “Let’s get you all set up. You’ll be takin’ your Dad’s horse, Ranger. He is already saddled up, just need to get your stuff on there.”
Luckily, you packed light. You brought a couple of changes of clothes, some food, some camping gear, and of course, your gun. 
Joel helps you tie down your bag and ensures all the straps he just put on are tight enough for you. You just watch him, enjoying how just takes control of the situation. He had the father instinct, always making sure everything would be safe and secure for the girls he loved. Or liked. Whatever.
You thank him, grabbing onto the saddle and flinging yourself up onto the horse. Ranger was truly your favorite horse in all of Jackson. He was the best behaved and the biggest. His mane was long and black and he loved to be brushed. You spent a lot of evenings riding him for fun, just enjoying his company. 
Joel gets on his horse, adjusting how he sits before he takes the reigns and guides you towards the main gates of Jackson. 
“You still sure you’re ready for a run like this?”
He’s giving you a chance to back out. But this was now an obligation. If you didn’t do this, you would indebted to everyone. You would be the person to blame if someone’s loved one died. Not really, but you felt that guilt. 
“Readier than I’ll ever be, Joel.”
-
“How is Ellie doing?”
You were burning to make conversation. You needed to rid your mind of all the anxiety surrounding your own life. Joel was too quiet, it made you feel queasy. He was too wrapped up in his thoughts. You were about 20 miles outside of Jackson, the sun was coming up through the foliage. 
He inhales sharply, “She’s a teenage girl. She’s grumpy.”
You grip onto the reigns of your horse, your body swaying back and forth with the trot. 
“I remember being that young and being constantly annoyed by my Dad’s nagging,” You chuckle, remembering the days of angst, “Are you annoying her, Joel?”
Joel scrunches his face at such allegations. If anything, Ellie was annoying him. 
“Course I’m not! Just… want to make sure she’s doing good. Which she is. Everyone tells me ‘bout how helpful she is.”
You think back to the last interaction you had with Ellie. She had been helping out at the stables when you were in charge of feeding and cleaning the horses before you got the job at the Tipsy Bison. Ellie wanted to know everything you knew, pestering you with silly questions like what their names were and why they were named what they were. 
“She’s very helpful,” You acknowledge, thinking about how enthusiastic she always was about learning, “You raised her right.”
He huffs, “Was hardly me. She’s just smart and raised herself.”
You did not quite understand the history between Joel and Ellie, but you knew Joel was not her biological father. You had no clue how they found each other or when. But you could see the love Joel had for Ellie. You remember him lighting up when he explained to you and your dad how she was the best shot amongst the recruits. 
Joel will probably never indulge you in the specifics of his relationship with Ellie, simply because it’s complicated. He never felt the need to explain himself to anyone but Tommy. 
“You had a hand in some of it, Joel. Give yourself a little credit.”
But Joel was never good at that. He was hard on himself, weary to accredit any of Ellie’s behavior to himself. 
The rest of the ride was occupied with the sound of leaves rustling. Joel spots a fallen tree that he says would be a good eating spot. You agree, hopping down off your horse with ease. You tie his reins up on a nearby branch and start digging through your saddle bag for the apple you packed for yourself. You were sick with unease all day. With everything going on in your life, the last thing on your mind was hunger. Plus, you were alone with a man that you had to put all your trust in. 
You pop a squat on the chipping bark and get out your pocket knife to start cutting the red fruit. Joel gets out a bag of jerky from his pack and finds a spot next to you. He looks over at you, perplexed at your food choice. 
“Just some fruit?” Joel interrogates, instantly knowing your hunger cannot be satiated by apples. No one can be satisfied with only fruit. 
Your stomach churns at your first bite, “Just not that hungry.”
That’s all the explanation he needs. You watch as he starts to munch on his bagged meat, cringing at the sound of his mouth. You try to block it out, but it’s eating away at your brain. You hated the sound of chewing, it was such a stupid pet peeve, but you couldn’t help yourself. Joel is oblivious, probably not even hearing how loud he’s being. You smack his arm out of instinct, something you did to your dad when he was being too obnoxious. 
He looks down at you with furrowed brows and annoyed eyes. 
“You’re eating too loud,” You say, wanting to smack yourself at how stupid it sounds out loud. 
He looks away, completely flabbergasted at the reaction. “Eating too loud? Really?”
You feel embarrassed for letting your brain get the best of you. So you just cut more of your apple off and slowly crunch on it. You try your best not to hyper-fixate on your chewing. When you’re in a trance, lost in your thoughts, Joel nudges you back. He’s getting you back, now. 
“Now you’re chewing too loud,” He jokes, popping another piece of his jerky in his mouth, “Should probably keep it down. So loud you may attract some infected.”
You can’t help but smile at his stupid rebuttal. You give him props for making you feel less foolish. 
“Sorry,” you mumble, eating another slice intentionally loud, “Can’t help myself. They are just so crunchy.”
You hear him giggle, his smile easing your churning stomach. 
“It’s okay, sweetheart. I’ll forgive you this one time.”
-
You knew the ride to this hospital would be long, but you didn’t realize how barren the landscape would be. You also didn’t realize how bad your ass would hurt. You and Joel finally pull off into some woods when the sun starts to set. Joel acts like he knows exactly how to navigate the woods, guiding his horse deeper and deeper. In between some large trees, you spot a lake. 
“Wanna go swimming?” You question after hours of no conversation. He glances back at you with a sly smirk on his face. When you look to your right, you notice a small path. Joel clicks his tongue for his horse to follow it. You two trot through the leaves, before coming upon a small decrepted cabin.
“This is us,” He states as he halts his horse. 
He had secretly always pictured taking you out here. He could not help but insert you into his small fantasies. Some nights he would imagine what it would be like to have you stick by his side forever. He always felt guilty afterward. 
You look at the building in wonder, completely speechless. You assumed you would be camping on the forest floor, not in an intimate cabin by a lake. You swing your leg over and slide off your saddle. Joel starts to tie up his horse nearby and you follow suit. You continue to look at the cabin, curious as to who kept up with it. It looked well maintained, besides some cobwebs at the peak of the roof. 
“Is this yours?”
He shakes his head, “No. Technically Tommy’s. He goes this way to get to another settlement about 50 miles south. He found this place on a whim and cleaned it up.”
You look around the area, seeing there’s even a fire pit right by the water. It had chairs and stones to outline the charred wood. You could not help but imagine what this place was before Tommy found it. How many fun nights were probably spent here by the original owner? If you had no one to go back to, you would just live here. But the more you think about that scenario, you think about how lonely you would probably get. Maybe if you had someone to stay with you. 
You finally look back at Joel. He’s standing on the stone path with his eyes locked on you. You get self-conscious for a moment, realizing he probably noticed how entranced you were with the surroundings. 
That’s exactly what he was thinking, too. How beautiful you stood in the shadows of the trees, your eyes curiously glancing around like a kid in a candy shop. You had him wrapped around your finger without even knowing it. 
“You good if we stay here overnight? Get back on the road tomorrow?”
How could you ever say no to an offer like that? 
You nod, swallowing back your insecurity, “Yeah, for sure.”
-
Joel could build a good fire. Watching him gather all the wood and place them into a perfect formation. As soon as he lights it, it builds and builds. When the warmth envelopes you, you start to finally feel at ease. Joel sits down with a stick, nudging the fire every so often.
He felt guilty. He felt like he was betraying your father, a man who was trusting him with his daughter. He should not be imagining how a little life in the woods would look like with you. He should not be picturing how beautiful you would look underneath him. He should not be having these devious thoughts about you. His eyes are trained on the flames as they build, trying to push those daydreams away. 
When his sleeve lifts as he toys with the charred wood, you notice the watch on his wrist. It looks ancient, the face of it shattered. You don’t realize you’re staring at it until he snatches his hand away from your view. 
“Sorry,” You retract, sitting further into the chair, “Your watch is broken.”
He places the stick next to his foot, finally out of his head for a moment, “Yeah, I’m aware.”
You were so stupid. You know not to pry further, knowing there’s probably a story and you don’t feel like you’re at a stage with Joel Miller to dive deeper. He notices how small you making yourself, and it makes him feel bad. He never wants to make you insecure. 
“Your necklace,” He starts, trying to place your mind somewhere else. It was a feature on your body that he noticed ages ago, but he never tried to beg the question, so this seemed like a great time to move the subject along. “Is it a moon?”
You reach up to your throat, feeling for the necklace you never took off. It feels like he almost wants to see if you will spill your story first. He is bad at reading women, sometimes. Most of the time. 
“Yeah, it was my sister’s.”
He feels stupid, instantaneously. As soon as those words fell from your lips, he put his face in his hands. 
“Oh, I’m sorry.”
Your feelings towards what happened 20 years ago were drastically different than how you feel now. You could still feel the horror and the pain you felt, but it wasn’t so gut-wrenching anymore. It honestly doesn’t even feel like it happened to you. 
You drop the crescent moon charm from your hands, “No, it’s okay. She died on outbreak day. She was a bit older than me, her name was Reagan.”
He looks up at you and just nods, taking in the information. You don’t know if it’s a gesture for you to continue to talk, but you take it as just that. 
“Her and my mom were at one of her soccer games when all hell broke loose. From what I heard, she was bit by one of her teammates and when me and my Dad were packing up our things to get out of there, I grabbed some of her stuff. A necklace, a sweatshirt, and her favorite pair of sneakers. I don’t know why. But yeah, this necklace is the only thing that survived 20 years. Sweatshirt got too small, shoes got too torn up.”
You don’t even notice the tears pricking in your eyes until you blink. You don’t even remember what she looks like, her face is kind of jumbled in your memory. You remember her hair though, long and brown and super curly. Joel just listens, his eyes trained on your hands as you nervously rub them together. When you peer up at him, you see the mutual pain written on his face. 
He thinks to his beautiful Sarah. His eyes fall to his broken watch. The pain is still very palpable. 
“‘m glad we have somethin’ from our people. Somethin’ to remember them by, ya’ know?”
You scan his broken watch and nod timidly. “Yeah, something to remember them by.”
-
You stand up after eating some more food you packed, ensuring you’re somewhat nourished before you go to sleep. Joel stares at the fire, his eyes heavy with exhaustion. He knows he has to sleep, but he knows you need it more. He’s willing to give up his hours for yours. 
“You want me to do first watch?” You quiz, hoping to get the answer no. Instead, he just shrugs. You cross your arms, a cool shiver going down your back as you step away from the fire. 
“I’ll start first,” He mumbles, grabbing his poking stick, “There’s a bed in there all ready for you. Get some rest, we got a long day tomorrow.”
You respond with a slight wag of your head, “Okay, goodnight, Joel.”
You turn on your heels and head towards the front door of the cabin. You creak the door open. It’s pitch black so you step back onto the small porch to grab the lantern Joel lit a while ago. You slowly creep through the one-room cabin, placing the lantern on the small table by the door. It lit up most of the room so you got a great look at the wooden framed bed, waiting for you to lay upon it. 
You feel a pang of guilt making Joel sit outside to guard you as you slept. You knew you needed rest. You also knew it would start getting colder and colder and that fire would die eventually. 
Joel could handle himself, after all. You would just have to push your worry aside. When you curl up onto the hard mattress, you think back to the last time you were left to trust another man to look after you as you slept. It was a traumatizing night, so instead of worrying yourself, you close your eyes and remind yourself that Joel is safe. Dad trusts Joel. Joel is a good man. 
Sleep eventually takes over, your soft snores rattling off the wooden walls. 
After a couple of hours, the shivering takes over Joel’s body, so he creeps into the cabin. The lantern is dimmer, slowly running out of fuel. He shakes his head, smiling to himself at your disregard for resources. He walks over to the small wood-burning oven, opening the door to it as quietly as he can. You don’t even stir. You’re a deep sleeper, he would remember. 
He starts a fire with the old coals, warming up the small space. Once he stands up from his squat, he hisses at the crack of his knees. He glances over at you, making sure he did not wake you. Nothing. 
You were a peaceful sleeper, your mouth slightly ajar. To Joel, you were always so beautiful. Not even just your looks, but your kind and reserved nature. You always gave him a delighted smile when he looked your way. You were dedicated to always being there for your father, which would always melt his cold heart. He would always watch you with a careful eye, praying that you would somehow get older or him, younger. He hated himself for admiring you so often, especially since he respected your father so much. But you were right there. 
He sat himself in the old recliner chair near the door, peaking out the window every so often. He would always find himself training his eyes back on you, watching your chest rise and fall slowly. 
It takes everything in him not to curl up next to you. 
-
The second day starts off a bit rough. 
When you wake up in the early morning hours, you take notice of a sleeping Joel in the corner of the room. You spring up, loudly rattling the bed frame. It sends Joel jumping out of his skin, his eyes flying open to look at you.
You are panting like you just ran a mile. 
“Jesus Christ, girl,” He barks, his tone tired but also vicious, “Thought someone had you at gunpoint.”
“You were sleeping!”
“Shit, yeah I was, wasn’t I?” His tone is more relaxed, sort of annoyed. He rubs his eyes, glancing outside. Your horses were still there and it doesn’t seem like you guys have been ransacked. 
You clench your fists, “You’re lucky we didn’t get shot in our sleep or something.”
He rolls his eyes, slowly rising from the chair he took over, “That’s a little dramatic, sweetheart. We are fine.”
After that comment, you did not want to talk to Joel Miller. 
You also start to question if you can trust him. He should’ve woken you up to take charge of the watch, but instead, he ignorantly fell asleep and risked your life. 
When you pack up to leave, he realizes how rattled you are. He wants to apologize, but he’s too stubborn to do so. You were being dramatic. But he shouldn’t have said that. He should’ve kept that comment to himself. He was never really good at holding his tongue, always saying the first thing on his mind. 
-
When the sun sets on the second day, Joel promises you two should be in Salt Lake the next afternoon. The whole day pretty much consisted of you two bickering about state capitals. He swears the capital of Pennsylvania is Philadelphia. 
“It’s not, it’s Harrisburg,” You would say. 
You also talked about times before the Infection. He mentions his daughter, Sarah, telling you about how she used to play soccer and she loved going to the Texas State Fair. It makes your heart happy to hear him light up about her, but it makes you want to cry hearing a father talk about his dead child. You can’t imagine that type of pain, and you hope you never do. He doesn’t even know why he’s suddenly baring his soul to you, but he starts to feel like his walls are falling away and he’s comfortable around you. 
He tells you about how he plays the guitar, which you lock onto quickly. 
“You’ll have to show me how good you are,” You smile, imagining Joel Miller strumming along to some folksy song you request. He can only imagine what type of music you would want to hear from him. 
“When we get home,” He mutters, “I'll give you a performance.”
“I cannot wait.”
The conversation with you was easy. You could get anything out of him, pretty much. You were a lot like your father, but softer. He enjoyed your company a bit more. Your laugh was infectious and you were a lot easier on the eyes, of course. When you two stop for a break, he watches as you look for four-leaf clovers on the forest floor. When you find one, you pick it up and bring it over to his hunched-down frame. 
“My mom used to say they were for love and luck,” You explain, “Think you need it for both.”
He knew you were joking by the way you giggle and return to your spot on the ground. He just shakes his head and sticks the clover in his jacket pocket. 
-
He was dreading being back in Salt Lake. He doesn’t want to relive that day when Ellie was practically ripped from him. It sent him spiraling just thinking about all the outcomes that could’ve transpired that day. 
He contemplates telling you for a few brief seconds. 
He wouldn’t have much to lose, especially now that everything is said and done. But then fear takes over and he wonders, would you judge him for it?
He imagines how you would react. How your nose would probably scrunch up, how your disposition towards him would soon contort into horror. You would probably call him a monster. You would probably never look at him the same way, with that beautiful smile and attentive gaze.
“You okay, Joel?”
You two were positioned on the edge of some woods off a dirt road. Joel didn’t want to attract anyone with fire, so you two decided you would just camp on the ground near the highway you would end up following to get into the city. 
“‘M all good,” He practically whispers, “Just tired. You mind gettin’ first watch?”
You just silently nod, watching him rise from his spot and move over to the sleeping bags you two had set up when you arrived. You watch as he awkwardly wiggles his large frame into a small sack. It makes you giggle a bit. He positions himself with his back to you, his front facing into the woods. He can’t spend his time staring at you like he would like to, he needs to sleep. 
You realize he has a leaf stuck on the back of his head. You couldn’t help yourself, it was going to bother you for as long as you were awake. You stand up and slowly creep up to him. 
You squat down and pluck the leaf out of his thick curls. His head snatches back at you, knitting his brows together in confusion. 
Secretly deep down, you just wanted to find a reason to touch him. 
“Can I help you?”
You give him a shit-eating grin, “Yeah, you just got leaves in your hair. It was going to bother me if I didn’t get it out. You’re very, very welcome.”
He rolls his eyes, “Can I sleep now?”
“Don’t know, I’m already getting bored without you glaring at me.”
You were now on a mission to annoy him, he guesses. 
Without thinking, he responds with a comment that would stick with you all night. 
“Yeah, you like it when I look at you, don’t ya?”
-
The homestretch was only about another 20 miles. You and Joel had made good time, only taking about three days to get to the hospital. After the subtle flirting with Joel the night before, you got a little more ambitious with your advances. 
Before you two took off to get to your destination, you asked Joel if you could change your clothes. You had mud all over your jeans and your shirt was reeking of body odor. The natural deodorants that were handmade in Jackson only did so much. 
“Yeah, make it quick,” He orders, pointing to a more private area of the camp, “There’s some bushes over there.”
“I’m not getting dressed in a bush, Joel. Just look away,” You test, already shrugging off your flannel. He notices your bold move, instantly peeling his eyes away from your direction. This can not be happening to him right now. 
“What the hell,” He murmurs, his hands propped up on his hips, “You’re doin’ this on purpose.”
You feel your cheeks heat up, “Doing what on purpose?”
“Testin’ me. Me and my patience.”
You throw your shirt over your head and grab one of your spare ones from your pack, “Well, if it’s a test, you’re passing with flying colors, Miller.”
He glances back at you without even really thinking, spotting you in your bra with a shirt covering your eyes. It’s almost like when you tell a child not to press a button, and it makes them want to do it even more.
He wanted to keep looking. 
“Fuck,” He says under his breath, trying to push those types of thoughts out of his mind. 
You shimmy off your pants, folding them as soon as you get them off your legs. You needed a shower so bad, you felt so filthy. 
“You think we could stop back at the cabin on the way home? I want to bathe.”
Thinking about you naked and taking a bath made his dick hard. 
“Yes,” He manages to say, “Hurry up, please!”
You grin at his frustration, “Fine, fine. I’m almost done.”
-
You and Joel trot along an abandoned highway, cars littering every lane. It was nothing new to you. You have seen plenty of cities in your lifetime. Each time was a bit different, but for the most part, they were all the same. Riddled with infected and bombed to shit. 
You think back to when Tommy said Joel had been here before. Your mind starts to wonder, and being that you still had a couple of hours before you got to see the actual hospital, you decide to speak up and ask. 
“When was the last time you were here?”
He thinks for a second. He was waiting for these questions. 
“Over a year ago.”
You shake your head, “Was there a reason?”
You had no business prying into Joel’s life, but you felt like after spending days with him, there was some kinship. Maybe even a friendship.
“Ellie’s mom was a Firefly. They had a base camp out here,” He explains, but would he go further? Would he spill all the beans?
It’s technically not his story to tell. But then again, Ellie didn’t even have the truth, so it was a story only he knew. 
You wait before responding, “Did you find her?”
“Who?”
“Ellie’s mom,” You press, glancing around some cars. You are trying to act like you didn’t care, but you could tell from the moment you entered the outskirts of the city, Joel was plagued with the weight of the atmosphere. His shoulders got heavier, his eyebrows further knitted together. He was tense. 
“No, she’s dead. So I brought her home,” He says, half-bending the truth. He’s lying, but not really. Ellie’s mom was dead but that was never the reason they came out here. He just wants to say it, but his chest feels like a weight is pushing down, almost cracking his ribs. He swallowed the guilt. 
“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.”
You didn’t have much else to say, letting the silence eat away at the prickle of your arm hairs as they stood up. You try to relax, but now that you are in the city, it feels real. You traveled all this way for medication so Jackson would not shun you. It sounded kind of stupid, coming all this way in hopes of a stocked Firefly hospital. 
You also traveled all this way with Joel Miller. You managed to speak to him without tripping over every word and poking fun at him. You watched him sleep at night, looking so peaceful in the woods surrounding him. You try to think about the last time you saw him smile. You saw him differently, now. He came all this way to help you and your dad. He is risking a lot, disregarding his duties back home, just so he can be with you and protect you. 
You ponder if things will be different when you get home. Maybe he would talk to you more when he came to the Tipsy Bison. Maybe he would wave back at you when you saw him around town. 
You secretly hoped being next to him for so long would change your relationship with him. 
Joel starts to ride next to you, studying your face as you stare forward. 
“What are you thinkin’ bout so hard over there?” He poses, watching your face twist when he speaks up. 
You lick your lips, “Thinking about what it’s gonna be like when I get home.”
“What do ya’ mean?”
You halt your horse to look over at him. He does the same. 
“We came all this way and I am scared when we get back, you won’t want to talk to me anymore.”
He shakes his head, a slight chuckle escaping his lips, “Kiddo, your dad’s my patrol partner. ‘Course, I’ll still talk to you. You’re always around.”
The nickname makes you cringe. You don’t want to be a kid to him. 
“Right, of course.”
-
When you get to the edge of the city, Joel starts explaining the game plan. How you will get to the hospital, do your sweep as quick as you can, and don’t meander around. He also explains how the exit plan is to drop everything, no matter what, and return to the horses. You see someone? Run. 
You want to say you know how to handle yourself, but you resist and just nod in understanding. 
To your surprise, you two do not run into any hoards. You turn a corner and spot a couple of infected twitching near an old school, and you two carefully back up and go up another block to avoid them altogether. You two don’t say anything to each other as you spot the hospital in the distance. Joel just points forward, having you trot at his side. 
You pull out your gun when you start to hear some clicking nearby. Joel gestures to you to be quiet and continues to the front of the hospital. You two ride your horses to the ambulance drop-off, parking them there. When you jump down, you start to grab your pack so you can fill it with whatever supplies you find. Joel does the same, throwing his leather backpack over his shoulder. You check the magazine of your gun and take off the safety. 
“Okay, we stay close to each other,” He explains in a hushed tone, “Grab whatever you think we need.”
You wiggle your head in agreement. He raises his rifle as you two enter the side door. The hospital is quiet besides the wind blowing through some shattered windows. You click on your flashlight that is attached to your backpack, making sure it’s pointed forward. The main corridor leads you down to some triage rooms and nurse's stations. Joel gestures to you to check out some triage rooms. You find some bandages and some tongue presses. You grab the entire box of bandages and stuff them in your bag. When you return to the hall, Joel is stuffing some of his finds in his pack. 
“No meds yet,” He grumbles. You two press forward, keeping your steps silent. You find some lab rooms off the main hallway and you two scope out each room carefully, your guns still drawn and at the ready. You find more items; some gloves, masks, and some scissors. You pick them up, stuffing them in your back. 
You hear movement from behind you and quickly spin. It’s just Joel, holding a couple of vials of medication. You rush towards him, using your light to see what the vials read. 
levofloxacin 
amoxicillin
“Jackpot,” You murmur, “Any more?”
He grabs a baggie sitting on a table nearby, “Not that I saw.”
You continue searching, not finding much of anything in the drawers. A lot of the stuff is picked through. 
You point to a central staircase, “Wanna go up?”
“Yeah, right behind you.”
Joel was reeling, spotting some areas where blood was splattered across the walls as he walked through the hospital. It was terrifying to put himself back in this exact spot. It felt like a fever dream. Now he had you with him, another person he cared too much about to admit to anybody, let alone himself. He cared about you in a whole different way than he cared about Ellie. 
You trail up the stairs, finding some old labs and nurse's stations. All were picked through. You couldn’t help but notice the blood all over the floor in some areas. You try to figure out what could have transpired here, but you don’t even try to beg the question to Joel. With the look on his face, you are afraid to say much of anything. 
Something bad happened here and he was a witness to it. 
It made you want to hurry up and spare his feelings. Instead of taking careful and methodical steps, you run room to room searching drawers and counters for anything of value. You find some alcohol swabs, safety pins, and some wrist splints. When you get to the last room in the hallway you’re in, you hit the jackpot. It’s a cabinet with some vials. 
You start to quietly read them off to Joel who’s standing on the threshold of the room. 
“Grab them all,” He says, pulling his pack off his shoulder so you can put some into his, “We can find use for ‘em.”
You also find some sutures and unopened syringes. You wish you could get down on your knees and thank whatever god is up there for blessing you with everything. You don’t believe in that though, so instead you excitingly grab Joel’s arm and shake it. 
“Let’s get this all home,” You smile, pressing your fingers harder into his bicep, “Maybe celebrate with something strong from the bar.”
Then you hear it. 
Click. Click. Click. 
Joel grabs your arm back, shoving you behind him. He slings his pack over his shoulder and you do the same. You never had many issues with killing infected, but you did not know what you were dealing with. It was dark and all too quiet for too long. Joel creeps forward, his gun drawn forward to peek out the door. When you do the same, he tucks you back behind him. 
Lining the hallway is about 3 clickers. Your stomach drops as they slowly make their way to the sounds you two made seconds ago. Joel glances back at you, his face very serious and stern. 
You can read the look on his face and being that you dealt with these fuckers before, you know that you need to be silent. He looks back down the hall, spotting an exit in a staircase that’s slightly blocked by one of the clickers. He waves you along as he slowly tiptoes down the hallway. You get closer and closer to the first clicker and your gun is trained right at them as you keep your distance. You can tell by the clothing that it was a woman at one time, the infection growing out of every crevice of her body. 
She clicks and clicks, but does not attack you. You and Joel continue, not making a sound as you shuffle past the next one. But once you get close to the one closest to the door, something snaps and it’s like they all realize exactly all at once. One squeals and the others follow suit. Joel yells for you to run, but you don’t budge, emptying your gun into the closest one. It crumbles to the ground. With that one down, Joel grips your wrist tightly and flings you towards the door. You two rush out as Joel lights up the hallway with gunfire. 
You now know that you’re attracting every infected in a mile radius so time is of the essence. You practically fall down the stairs trying to get to the bottom. Joel does not like how fast you moving, pressing you to run faster. You two sprint down the hallway as two runners come full speed at you from an opposing hallway. You try to shoot but your gun is empty. You scream for Joel to do something and he puts them down expertly. He’s spot on even with the adrenaline coursing through his veins. You find the door you came in from and quickly make your way to Ranger. He seems sort of spooked so you try to gingerly climb up him, grabbing his reigns from the pole you tied him to. Joel is quick to mount his horse. He pulls his horse back, guiding it to head back the way you guys came. 
You follow suit, hearing stirring from all around you as your hair whips in the wind. You are not worrying about the noise you two are making now, galloping down the once-busy streets of Salt Lake City. 
“Don’t stop til’ I say so!” Joel calls out. You can hardly hear with your heartbeat in your ears and the wind against your ear drum. 
You get to the edge of the city after about 20 minutes of dodging left-behind cars and random barriers. You get to the point where the foliage takes over and the infected taper off. You don’t realize it until you start slowing down and your heart gets back to its normal pace, you’re freezing. 
You yell out for Joel, who’s still going quite fast. He halts completely, letting you catch up with his step. 
“We have to stop, I’m freezing.”
You weren’t wearing all your layers and you knew it would be detrimental if you didn’t stop to wrap up before you two continued your journey. Joel nods, trotting off the main part of the road into some woods. 
When you get off your horse, you can feel Joel’s eyes lock onto your vibrating body. 
“Jesus, girl,” He dismounts, wrapping his reigns around a nearby branch, “The wind do you that much damage?”
You can’t help but laugh as you rifle through your pack to find your extra layers. You can remember packing two thermals, but with the way you’re shaking, you can’t even grip onto the clothes to move them around to search. You don’t even realize Joel has come to your side, you only notice when he nudges your side with his three fingers. You move out of his way so he can look, but you can’t help but feel the warmth his gentle touch gives you on your hip. 
He pulls out a thermal, handing it out to you. 
“Just put it over your other long sleeve,” He instructs, digging for another layer for you. You take his advice and throw it over your head. When your head pops through the neck hole, you spot him smirking at you. 
“If you don’t warm up soon, I may have to share my body heat so we can get back on the road,” Joel jokes, watching you pull your hair out of the back of your long sleeve. You didn’t hate the sound of that, truthfully. 
“Guess I will try my best not to warm up then.”
He shakes his head, grabbing onto your other thermal, “You can’t say stuff like that to me, darling.”
“Why not?”
Joel has slipped up a couple of times already, he wasn’t planning on giving in. But the teasing was fun and light-hearted. He knew in his heart it was not going to turn into anything. 
Right?
“Because I don’t think it’s a very good idea for us to talk like that to one another,” He explains, stepping back as you add the other shirt onto your already warming body, “May lead us somewhere we can’t come back from.”
You swallow, “Maybe I’d like that.”
-
It takes you a day and a half to get back to the cabin. Joel promised that you two could spend a whole day there if need be. You two were physically and mentally exhausted. The horses needed rest too, you could tell Ranger was beat. 
When you arrive on the property, Joel makes sure to scope out a radius before you two settle in. Ever since the sly passes you made at him, he’s been more quiet. You can tell he’s deep in thought. Maybe it wasn’t about you, but he had something on his mind. 
You use the fire stove to warm up some water from the lake to give yourself a quick “bath”. You just used an old rag and some bar soap to scrub your limbs, trying to get off all the caked-on dirt. Joel stayed outside by the fire, cooking up some squirrels he was able to trap. You stood in your undergarments, lathering your skin, watching him from the window as he poked at the fire. 
You felt a bit better once you were clean. The growl in your stomach was dull and kind of painful. You needed to eat, so you got your dirty clothes back on and headed outside to prop yourself up next to Joel. 
When you open the cabin door, his head snaps over to you. 
“Howdy, cowboy,” You gleam, walking down to the stump next to him. You couldn’t help but flirt now. It was funny to watch him squirm, the glint in his eyes not hard to notice. 
“You all clean?”
You nod, giving him a cheeky smile. “Yeah, now you go get yourself all cleaned up.”
He grabs his stick poker, “Don’t got any soap.”
“Use mine.”
Joel stops his motion immediately to train his eyes back on you. “You want me to smell like you?”
“Well, I smell delicious, so why not?”
He scans your body with his eyes, “Cause if we get home and your Dad smells your soap on me, he’ll put it bullet between my eyes.”
You know he’s being dramatic, finding any excuse to opt out of using the soap you just used on your body. 
“So, what you’re saying is,” You clear your throat before continuing, “If my dad wasn’t your friend, you’d lather yourself with my soap?”
He contemplates for a moment, “Yeah, and other things.”
Your heart stops beating for a second. Joel can not help but smirk at your reaction. He was playing with fire, literally and figuratively. The tension between you two was so heavy, that you do not think you could even take a deep breath in. 
He stands up from his spot next to you. “Why don’t ya eat, sweet thing? I have to clean myself up, I guess.”
-
Joel can not do this. 
You were his friend’s daughter. Sure you were grown, beautiful, strong-willed, and everything he could want and more but he could not take advantage of you. The only way he felt this way right now was because tensions were so high back in Salt Lake. You two have spent a lot of time together, the hormones… what the fuck is he thinking?
You sit by the fire, your stomach doing back flips as you think about Joel in the cabin, by himself, practically half naked. 
Why were you doing this to yourself?
Your heart is racing faster than it ever has. No clicker, no stranger, nothing has made you this nervous. Your hand reaches for the door handle, but before you can turn it, Joel rips open the door. 
“What do you think you’re doing?”
You stand there, dumbfounded. “I-I don’t know.”
He’s standing over you, his chest rising faster the more you keep your eyes trained on him. He has a green flannel on, the top couple of buttons undone. You lift your hand to touch the skin peeking through, but he stops your movements before you can make contact. You note the scent of wood burning in the cabin and it’s a lot warmer than you left it. Joel must have started the stove again. 
“We can’t.”
You shake your head, “No, we can’t, can we?”
You two know better. You know better. You know better. 
You are breathing in each other’s spaces. You don’t even want to look him in the eyes. His arm snakes around your midsection, pulling you forward into the cabin. At that moment, you knew that you two didn’t know any better. 
It’s almost like you two silently made the decision. 
“We can’t tell anyone about this, sweet girl,” He whispers, his hands still firmly on your back. You could not resist this temptation anymore. He was right in front of you, wanting you just as badly as you wanted him. 
Your eyes glance up at his dark sultry gaze, “It’s our little secret.”
His hand reaches up, gracing your chin with his touch. When he dips down to meet your height, you finally get bold and extend your hand up and around his neck. Your lips connect and you feel like a million little butterflies explode in your stomach. You had never desired a kiss from anyone as much as you did with Joel. 
He’s eager and impatient, though. He’s not as soft as you imagined for a man who hardly spoke. He just wants to feel you everywhere, all at once. His mouth melts into yours, his tongue exploring every inch of yours. He’s moving you around the room, stumbling over furniture and shoes as he backs you into the large wooden bed frame. 
“So fuckin’ perfect,” He mumbles into your lips as soon as he lifts you up onto the mattress. It catches you by surprise, mainly because you never expected him to manhandle you in this way. He’s hungry for every inch of you. After all these months of secretly pining for him and him not giving you any positive response, you never anticipated something like this happening. Especially at a time like this. 
“Joel,” You whine, pulling him down on top of you as you fall back into the flannel blankets, “I need you everywhere.”
He grins peppering kisses down your neck, “Don’t worry, I will treat you so fuckin’ good. Been wantin’ you for so long.”
It was so filthy and hot. Your dad’s patrol partner, his best friend. Keen to make you feel good? And wanting it for a while? You must be imagining his words because you can’t even comprehend the situation. 
But it’s true. Joel’s secretly been watching you when you’re not looking. When you sling drinks on Friday nights, he watches you from a booth in the corner. Tommy’s caught him a couple of times, smacking him and reminding him that you were off limits. When you came to his house with extra pot pie or soup, he would watch you walk away from his house from his living room window. 
This taboo yearning kept him up at night. But now, he has you alone and he needs a taste. 
He pulls back to look at your face, “Are you sure you want me?”
You can’t help but giggle a bit. 
“Joel, I’ve been wanting you for longer than I would like to admit,” You purse your lips as you bring your hand up to trace his collarbone, “Think about you all the time.”
It was the truth. Your mind was taken up but all his little sly comments. The way he would drop anything to help you or your dad. His beautiful brown eyes didn’t help one bit either.
“My god, girl…Gonna have me cumming in my jeans like a teenager.”
He returns to laying kisses all along your body. It started with wet kisses down your neck, only for it to trail right where your shirt begins, right below your collarbones. You push him back for a moment, taking your shirt off over your head. He watched you carefully, ensuring there was no hesitancy with your actions. He wanted to be absolutely positive that this is what you wanted. 
As soon as you reach for the clasp of your bra, Joel grabs your arms away. 
“Let me,” He mumbles, letting his fingers trace along the seam of the black fabric before using his right hand to undo the back. With him this close to you again, you inhale sharply, catching the scent of your soap. 
“See you took up my offer,” You tease, letting your bra fall down your shoulders, “Did you get clean just for this, Miller?”
He catches a glimpse of you under the bra and his mind goes blank. You notice his change in disposition and decide it’s best to discard every other article of clothing completely. You struggle to get your jeans off, so he helps by practically ripping them off your legs. He can’t help but spot the soak undies attached to your jeans. When you are bare under him, he gawks at you for a moment. 
“A beautiful woman like you,” He shakes his head, biting his lip. He unbuckles his pants before he stands and shoves them down his legs. While he’s making an effort to get as naked as you, you start unbuttoning his flannel. He watches you take your time, thumbing each button slowly. He tilts your head back up, his eyes leering at you for a moment. “And you want someone like me?”
You know he’s probably in his own head, so you feel the need to prove to him, that yes this is what I want. 
You grab onto his neck and pull him back down into a passionate kiss. When you notice him give in, you use all your might to push him sideways and onto his back next to you. You mount his lap immediately, holding him down with your body weight. Your soaked slit trudges over his large hard-on while you dip your head to capture his lips. You feel his hands trail up the sides of your body, leaving goosebumps in his wake. He finds your boobs, palming them with his warm calloused hands. You were extra sensitive so as soon as his fingers find your nipples, you’re moaning into his mouth. 
When your hips jet forward, his tip slides between your pussy lips. The sensation sends him into overdrive, his grip on your waist getting tighter. He’s so fucking big. 
“No foreplay, you just wanna grind your pussy right onto my cock?” His question sends shockwaves through your body and you raise your hips up off his crotch. You kneel over him, anticipating to rotate your pelvis back onto him, but he has other ideas. 
Because Joel has been thinking about what you taste like for too long. He can’t just fuck you. He lays back, all the while, dragging you up to his chest so your pussy is hovering over his pursed lips. 
“Joel, what are you doing?”
You feel his hot breath huff onto your slick center, “I’m gonna devour this beautiful pussy, first. Need to get you warmed up.”
Without any warning, he wraps his arms around your thighs and pushes your center closer to his outstretched tongue. You gasp when he starts to run his tongue up and down your slit. You can’t help but settle around his face, your knees feeling like they may already give out. 
You’ve never sat on someone’s face and watched them eat you out like a starved man. But Joel is precise with his motions, his mouth wrapping around your clit. When he starts to suck, the suction noise makes you whimper and shake. You have only ever cum by your own hand, so when the familiar heat rises in your stomach, you know instantly this is going to be the best sex you’ve ever had in your life. 
Joel is a very easy man to please. He thoroughly enjoys watching women crumble above him, their orgasms surging through their bodies while his tongue is pressed into them. But with you, he wants to drudge it out of you over and over again. You’re so magnetic on top of him, your head thrown back in pleasure. Your hands rest on your shoulders as you grind down on him, your peak teetering the edge. He shimmies his hand in between your thighs and begins to use his fingers in you, just to drive you crazier. He’s fucking up into you with his pointer and middle fingers, managing to latch onto your clit while he does. 
When you tumble into bliss, Joel moans into you, egging on your spasms. You lurch forward, dragging your center off his drenched lips. Your legs are limp as you try to crawl up the bed. Joel rolls over, creeping up the bed with you. You lay on your back, propping yourself up onto some of the pillows. 
“Do you need a break?” He asks, his hands feeling up your bare, still kind of shaking, thighs. You shake your head “yes” and breathe out loudly. Your body is covered in a light sheen, the sweat pooling around your hairline. Joel lets you take a moment, making sure you are completely ready for him. 
When you finally meet his eyes, your stomach fills with butterflies. He’s admiring you from his position, his eyes not finding yours until he’s done checking out your bare chest. You giggle, tugging on his wrists. He takes up your advances, positioning himself above you. He’s caging you in with his tanned strong arms, only allowing you to really move your upper body. You tangle your hands through his messy dark peppered curls, which makes him sigh. He secretly loved it when women felt through his hair. 
“Fuck me,” He groans as he reaches down between you, grabbing ahold of his hard member. You watch as he drags it through your heat, gathering all your wetness before teasing your entrance. 
“Joel, please.”
He smirks, pushing in just his tip, “Please what, baby girl? You want me to give you all of it?”
You are already overstimulated after your last orgasm and you are a bit nervous to imagine what all of it is. You nod, though, because the stretch is already so delicious. 
“Please, Joel, please. I need it,” You whine, knowing how desperate you sound. It’s music to Joel’s ears. 
“Shh, baby,” He eases in further, “I told you I’m gonna treat you real good. Gonna treat this pussy, so fuckin’ good.”
When he’s fully sheathed in you, your nails are digging into his shoulders. When he eases back to pull out some to ensure you can take it, you’re a moaning mess. It only eggs him on, feeling how slick you are and how tight you are around him. 
“That’s right baby, take all of me,” He says as he lifts himself off you. You have nothing to grip onto now, except the sheets that line the queen-sized bed. Joel wants to watch himself slip out of you and go back into you with ease. You love the friction, but you know you need more. 
You don’t know how, but it’s like he reads your mind. He starts to increase his pace, holding onto the back of your thighs as he drills into you. The curvature of his dick hits exactly where no man could ever reach. 
“Oh my god, fuck Joel! Fuck!”
Your words only encourage him to go harder and faster.
“Keep screamin’ my name, baby doll.”
The sweat is dripping down his face with how much effort he’s putting into fucking you. You’re floored at how quickly your orgasm builds again, the sounds of him plowing into you alone sends you into overdrive. 
As soon as you start to vibrate under him, Joel takes that as a great time to start thumbing at your clit. You feel every one of your nerve endings burning with such rapture, that you can’t even say anything. You’re just howling, no coherent words even coming out. Your vision goes white.
The scene is something out of the old pornos Joel used to watch. You’re writhing under him, the orgasm practically sending you cross-eyed. You reach up to anchor yourself down and the only thing you can find to grab is Joel’s forearm. 
“Yes, Joel!”
His hips continue to snap into yours as you squeeze his cock with your gyrating hips. He’s fucking you through it, watching your face contort. Your grip on his arm hurts, but he does not care. It’s unbelievably hot to watch the girl he has adored from afar cumming around him. Over and over. 
The scene is enough to have him chasing down his own high. The feeling of your cunt gripping onto him so tight, while his name is chanted from your lips, the cum practically shoots out of him before he has time to grab his shaft and pull out. He does not empty himself in you though, quickly prying himself out of your weeping hole and spilling out the rest onto your stomach. 
“Shit.”
You don’t even realize what happened, not caring about really anything except for how wonderful and high you feel. Joel tumbles onto his side, half of his body resting on yours. His mouth is close to your ear so he whispers it to you, his voice shaky. 
“I came inside you.”
You lick your lips, trying to regain some saliva in your mouth, “I do not care, Joel.”
He does not prefer that answer, but he accepts it for the time being. You could not feel your face at the moment, you did not have time to worry yourself over Joel cumming inside you. It was not the first time someone did that. 
Joel rolls off the bed, his legs feeling wobbly with his first steps. He’s still half hard and stumbling over to the bowl of water he just used to clean off himself. He grabs a clean rag and soaks it in the soapy water. The least he could do was clean up his mess. 
You watch him trudge over to you, the cum still pooled on your stomach and a bit in your belly button. 
Joel places the warm towel on your lower tummy, wiping up his mess. 
“Thanks,” You manage to say, your post-orgasm haze wearing off a bit. Now you’re just cold and exhausted. You shiver as soon as he removes the towel from your buzzing body. He notes it immediately and grabs the blanket that had been kicked to the floor. He lays it over you, making sure your full nude body is covered by the chilly air. 
“I need to go take a leak, I’ll be right back.”
You try to stay awake. But as soon as he gets some clothes on and heads outside to relieve himself, you’re lulled to sleep by the sounds of the rustling woods that surround the cabin. 
-
When you slowly open your eyes, you instantly notice how dry your mouth is. The itchy fabric of the blanket is tickling your bare limbs as you shift. Joel’s not beside you. 
You sit up, glancing around the cabin. His stuff is still here, but he is not. You keep the scratchy blanket wrapped around you as you plant your bare feet on the wooden floor. As soon as you take your first step forward towards the front door, it slowly swings open. 
Joel stands there, fully clothed, cheeks reddened from the cold outdoors. 
“Mornin’,” He says with a sleepy voice, “Got up early to get the horses fed and saddled up.”
All you remember is him going to pee outside last night, right before you fell asleep. “Did you ever come to bed last night?”
“Yeah, only got a couple of hours of sleep. You took up most of the bed.”
You clear your throat, becoming hyper-aware suddenly that you are very naked under the blanket. Joel tries not to notice your natural sensuality when you wake up. Sleepy eyes, swollen lips, slightly tangled hair. Even if last night never happened, he would be completely enamored by you. 
“Oh, okay,” You mutter, trying to act natural about the fact that you slept with Joel fucking Miller last night. “We all set then?”
He shuts the front door, cutting off any more cold from slipping in. You watch him slowly start to invade your space. He feels pulled towards you, the gravity overcoming every sense he has. He needs to be close to you, touching you, feeling you. 
“Yeah, we are all set.”
Chills run down your spine when his cold hand reaches out and grazes your cheek. You flick your eyelashes towards him, not knowing what to say next. He dips down to your height, kissing your lips carefully. He is nervous you will back away from him, but you don’t. You lean forward into him, the weight of your entire body pressing into him. 
He is the first to pull away, but you swear you could be latched onto him forever. His big brown eyes are lasered in on your eager lips, but in the back of his mind, he knows that you two need to get back home soon. He promised Tommy four days, nothing more. And you needed to get home to your Dad. Fuck. Your Dad. His fuckin’ friend. 
“We have to get home,” Is all he says. 
And then he’s gone. It’s like he blipped out of the room. You blink and the door slams and you are alone again. 
-
You stumble out of the cabin with your backpack on, your eyes adjusting to the sunshine between the falling away leaves. Winter creeps in so quickly in Wyoming, you think to yourself. 
Joel is already posted up on his horse, waiting for you to hurry along and join him. You pet Ranger for a moment before you hop up onto his back. He can’t help but realize how perfect you seemed in the sunlight. Your face hasn’t aged with time like his. It makes sense because you’re so much younger than him. You’ve lived a very full and traumatic life, sure, but you still had a lot more energy to live. He couldn’t picture that you’d want to spend the rest of it with an older guy with maybe 20 more years left in him if you’re lucky. 
The thoughts start to eat away at him as you two make your way through the forest. 
You assume he’s just tired from not getting a lot of sleep, so you just keep your lips sealed until you make it to the main trail back home. 
“So, when we get home,” You break the quietness with your open-ended statement. Joel doesn’t know what you’re insinuating, so he just keeps his head forward. “What happens, then?”
He pulls back his horse's reins to position himself looking directly at you. 
“What do you mean?”
You look at him suspiciously, “Do we tell people?”
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Joel thinks. 
“Tell them what?”
He has to be messing, right? You think. 
But no, he’s deadly serious. 
“About us,” You remark as Ranger trots a bit closer to Joel. He shakes his head and your heart sinks. He can’t do this, not after you two slept together. 
“There is no us,” He grumbles, unable to look you in the eyes anymore, “We can’t do that. You’re too young.”
If you weren’t on a horse, you would’ve already smacked him. “What the hell, Joel? What if you get in my pants and make me feel special and now we are nothing? Because I’m a little bit younger than you?”
“No, it’s not like that-”
“Well, it seems like it is like that,” You bite the inside of your cheeks, holding back every instinct to burst into tears, “Fuckin’ asshole. I should’ve known better.”
-
When the walls of Jackson come into your line of sight, you could cry with excitement. Your hands were shaking, not only from the cold but the nerves. You had been silent the entire ride back. Your only desire was to get home to your Dad and ignore Joel Miller for the rest of your life. 
You can only hope and pray that your father is on the mend. To keep on track and not let panic take over, you’ve tried to put your mind on other things this whole trip. Most of those things you wish you’d forgotten, already. 
The doors open when you two get close. When the crack is big enough to see through, you spot some familiar faces waiting for you. Tommy, Maria, and even your father. He’s standing up straight, wrapped in layers of jackets and blankets. You tap Ranger with your foot, getting him to speed up. When you reach about 30 feet away, you practically fall off him to get your arms around your father. 
A sense of relief floods your body. A tidal wave of happiness and solace. He’s okay. He’s alive. 
When his scent reaches your nose, it triggers your tear ducts. After years of never having to really worry about him, knowing he can handle himself, you have felt this constant state of uneasiness the last week. 
“My baby is back,” He grumbles into your hair, his arms locking around you, “I knew I could trust that Joel.”
You don’t have time to feel guilt over your actions, you’re just so happy he’s upright. You also don’t want to hear his God-forsaken name from your own Dad. When you pull back to inspect his face, you note the tiredness in his eyes. He looks better, but not his normal. You grab each end of the blanket that’s slowly slipping off his shoulders and bundle him tighter. 
“Let’s get you back in the warm, how ‘bout it?”
You glance back at Joel who just nods, knowingly. You remember that you still have your backpack on, so before you stroll away, you shimmy out of it. Tommy watches you carefully as you hand it off to Joel. 
“Get those meds to the infirmary,” You whisper to no one in particular. Joel studies your face, waiting for you to say something else. You do not. As he grabs your pack, you feel like Maria and Tommy are gawking at you two. Like they know something was left unsaid. 
You two move differently around each other. When you shift one direction, Joel follows suit. 
Joel feels like every eye in Jackson is on him. Tommy’s being the most piercing, watching him like a hawk as he grabs his horse and guides him towards the stables. While you stroll away with Maria and your father, Joel and Tommy bring the horses and supplies to the stables. 
As you walk, you listen to Maria explain your father’s steady recovery. She mentions how Ellie has been keeping a careful eye on him. After she heard you and Joel were going to be gone together, she asked Maria if she could help him somehow. Once your dad got well enough to walk, she got him settled in your house. She’d go over there for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, just to help. It makes your heart swell when you hear your dad say how kind and generous she was, just like you. 
-
Joel starts to unpack your bags from your horse first when he gets the horses parked. 
“Somethin’ happen out there?” Tommy presses, noticing how odd you and Joel moved in front of him, “With her?”
“No, nothin’,” He lies, placing your bags on a table near Ranger. When he lifted the first duffle bag, he got a whiff of you and it made his stomach sink. “We just had a rough spot in the hospital. Clickers and shit. Nothin’ too crazy-”
“Joel, I know when you’re lyin’ to me,” His eyes are shooting daggers now. Joel was too old to be pestered by his little brother. He groans in annoyance but Tommy does not give up, “What did you do?”
“I didn’t do nothin’, Tommy.”
“Bullshit,” He grumbles, grabbing one of your bags, “Want me to ask her?”
“You won’t get anythin’ out of her. She’s mad at me, okay? She is pissed I won’t…”
He feels humiliated, his stomach twisting into knots. He would never intentionally hurt you. He just put his foot in his mouth when he realized how much your actions would change everything for him. He could not just be someone you slept with. He could not just leave it. 
“You won’t what, Joel?”
He bites his lip, not wanting to say it out loud. 
“I won’t let her ruin her life for me.”
Tommy’s eyebrows furrow, not completely understanding what he’s droning on about. 
“What?”
“Jesus Christ, Tommy!” Joel wasn’t anticipating a shake-down when he got home. You two really didn’t help with those looks splattered across your faces when you rolled into Jackson.
“You slept with her, didn’t you?”
Joel shakes his head, peeling his eyes away from Tommy. Joel knew nothing could get past him, so he is practically surrendering. Tommy knew then. 
“You dumbass,” He whispers, getting closer to Joel, “You slept with her when her daddy is your patrol partner? After I told you to stay away?”
Joel clenches his teeth, “I don’t need this right now. I’m gettin’ these meds to the infirmary and then I’m takin’ her stuff to her.”
“Joel-”
“Just fuckin’ drop it, Tommy. I ain’t doin’ this.”
-
Your Dad has a nice setup, thanks to Ellie. She has transformed the downstairs guest room into a wonderful stay, with tons of pillows and bedside service. When you get inside the house, Ellie is there. She stands in the corner of the living room, timidly, as you guide your dad back to his warm bed. Maria and her wait for you to handle getting him back to his bedroom. Even though his recovery has been a steady incline, he’s very weak and exhausted all the time. It’s his body’s reaction to fighting a rough illness, but he made sure to reassure you that Sidney told him it’ll be a couple of weeks before he’s 100% back to normal. 
You get him back in bed, his eyes already drooping to find slumber again. You manage to get his shoes off and help him under his covers. Once his head hits the pillow, you stand by the bed for a minute to ensure he’s actually sleeping. You slip out of the room, and the sudden rush of comfort of being home takes over your senses. To hear the crackling of the fireplace, and the smell of your homemade candles. While you enjoyed every moment spent with Joel, there’s nothing like home. 
For a second there, you thought you had that same feeling being next to him in bed. But maybe you were wrong. 
You walk out to where Maria and Ellie stand. They are mumbling to each other while you kick off your boots by the door. 
“Hey, Ellie,” You catch her attention, her freckled face down turning with concern. You smile, trying to ease her, “Thank you for all you’ve done here. I am glad he had someone like you looking after him.”
She nods, her lips twitching, “It’s no problem at all. I know how much you two mean to Joel and I just wanted to do what I could.”
Hearing his name sinks your heart, “We owe ya one.”
Because you did. No matter what would eventually transpire between you and Joel, you owe him your father’s life. His idea saved him. With how sick he was, Joel’s quick plan was enough to bring him home. Then for Ellie to spend her days looking after him while you two were gone? You were forever indebted to them. Sadly. 
“Well, we should leave you to get settled. Let us know if you need anything at all,” Maria gestures to Ellie towards the front door. Their footsteps trail around you, heading to your front door. Before Ellie can reach for the handle, there’s a knock. You nod your head, letting her know it’s okay to open it. 
Joel stands there, your bags in his hands. 
You honestly just left your belongings for him to deal with. Joel looks down at Ellie, his eyes lighting up at the sight of her. She’s not as impressed, initially. 
“Hey kiddo,” Joel acknowledges, before spotting Maria, “Mrs. Miller.”
“We were just heading out,” Maria says, pushing the door wider so she and Ellie can slip by his large frame, “Give the girl her things and let her settle back into her life, huh?”
Joel was already annoyed at the narrowed eyes and judgemental jabs. It’s like everyone somehow knew he fucked up. 
You two watch Maria and Ellie leave, their breaths forming clouds in the cold sharp air. Jackson’s weather changed overnight, you think, remembering how it was more tolerable before you left. 
“Can I come in?” Joel ponders, still holding your backpack and duffle. 
It was cold and while you wanted to slam the door on him, you know you can’t. You move away from the threshold, gesturing for him to come in. His footfalls are heavy and drawn out. You shut the door, waving him towards the living room so your voices don’t carry down the hallway to your father’s newly set up bedroom. 
He places your bags on the couch before he stretches his shoulders in discomfort. Your stuff was not that heavy, but Joel could not help but try to draw your attention. He glances around your living room, taking in some of the artwork and photos that line the walls. Some are old photos of you and your father, in which you don’t really resemble him at all. 
“Back to how things were, huh?” You remark, bitterly. You wanted to attack him with every mean thing plaguing your mind, but you don’t. You were tired from all the travels but you were also tired of the idea of fighting for someone who does not care to fight for you back. You had done that for years with pointless boys. 
The whole walk to your house, Joel’s thoughts were moving a million miles a minute. He did not want you to live your life resenting him. He cared for you deeply, but he did not want you to miss out on all the wonders of life. Joel could not give you kids. He could not give you 40 more years of happiness. He would be an elderly man before you could even reach menopause. He does not want you to regret things when you’re old and gray. 
“I don’t want that. You know damn well I don’t want that.”
You could scream. But you stay even, not giving in to the temptation to just rip him a new one. 
“I don’t know what you want, Joel. One minute you’re kissin’ me and begging to be with me, the next you’re telling me you can’t be with me because I’m too young.”
“Baby-”
“No! Don’t you dare? You had no intention of making this a thing, yet you played into it and got exactly what you wanted. I’m just another notch for you, ain’t I?”
Your hands are clenched, waiting for his delayed response. You are embarrassed and humiliated that you were delusional enough to let Joel toy with every one of your emotions. 
“You know that ain’t true, girl. I just don’t want you to live your life regretting that I was a part of it, okay? You want to spend your days with an old man who can’t give you everything you want? ’m not good for you.”
He can’t let you make this mistake. 
But you’re not easing up. 
“What do you think I want? Kids? A simple life? A picket fence? Joel those are things I wanted when I was living in a world that didn’t have a brain-eating infection that’d turn people into zombies,” You’re huffing and puffing, trying to understand why he thinks he can tell you what you need and want. 
“I spent years of my life wishing I could get those things, but I gave up a long ass time ago. I don’t want those things nearly as much as I want you. I fuckin’ want you, okay?”
You realize you’re not being quiet and your Dad could probably hear every word falling from your lips. He can hear you desperately plead with Joel Miller to be with you. 
Joel is shocked you’re laying all this out. He can’t believe his ears when you say you want him. A man like him being wanted is quite unbelievable, especially by a woman like you. 
You could hear a pin drop with how silent your house is. You fold your arms, trying not to give into the nausea you feel from spilling your soul to him. 
“I just…” He fidgets with his hands for a minute before those puppy eyes glance up at you, “I don’t want to ruin your life.”
You step closer to him, your face inches away from him. You train your eyes on his mouth, unsure how to respond to such blasphemy. 
“I have spent so many days thinking about what it’d be like to live in a world where the Joel Miller would even glance in my direction. I imagined what it’d be like to kiss him,” You’re whispering now, making sure this revelation is for his ears only, “I imagined what it’d be like to have a man who’d treat me well and look… Exactly like you. I have dreamed of you.”
Joel would have never guessed such a statement fall from your lips. 
You breathe out, relieved it’s finally off your chest.
“I just don’t want to leave ya worse than I found ya,” His softness instantly makes you crumble into his arms. He holds you tight, before pulling away to search your face. You teeter forward on your toes, pressing a firm but attentive kiss to his lips. 
When you draw back, “I’m not givin’ you up, Joel.”
The tension is shattered when you hear your Dad yell your name from down the hallway. You snap out of your trance of staring at Joel’s beautiful lips and dart toward the voice. 
“Yeah?”
You open the door and see him, his eyes wide open and focused on the door. 
“Who you talking to out there? Is that Joel?”
Suddenly you’re hyper-aware of every word you just said, scared half to death that your Dad would get out of bed and beat some sense into you. Joel follows you down the dimly lit hallway, but you don’t even hear him, too rattled by your father’s question. 
“Yes, it’s me,” Joel speaks up, coming forward to meet your Dad’s confused expression, “How you feelin’, man?”
“I’m feelin’ like I’m hearing some odd things from down the hall. You two fighting?” His voice is breaking a bit. 
The silence after he asks the question is deafening. You glance over to Joel whose mouth is slightly ajar, unable to move with an answer. You bite the inside of your cheek, wishing you could disappear into the wall nearby. 
Joel cannot lie to his friend. He certainly would never do it with you right beside him. 
“Yeah, you uh, heard us?” He barely manages. 
“Yeah, I sure as hell heard my daughter beggin’ you to take her on, is that true?”
“Dad-“
“My daughter wants to date a man that’s 10 years younger than her own father? Kind of twisted.” He snaps, shoving the blankets off his legs. “But, I am gonna be honest… I expected this.”
You can hardly breathe with the tension in the air. 
“Sorry?”
Joel’s tone is dry, and he’s unable to fully form a coherent thought. 
Your dad coughs before he starts, “Well, I could tell by the way you looked at her that you had a thing for her, Miller. Didn’t think you’d be dumb enough to entertain it.”
“Dad, he’s not dum-“
“And I thought you’d get over this little schoolgirl crush, but I was mistaken, I guess.”
You were used to your Dad’s sarcasm and upfront jabs. You spent a lifetime throwing them back at him, but this time you had nothing to say. You watch as he settles back from obnoxiously tearing off his blankets. 
You fiddle with your fingers, trying not to show your internal anxiety-riddled monologue. He thought you’d get over your crush. He always noticed how Joel looked at you. How did he look at you? How did you never notice?
Joel is spiraling, reverting to his original conclusions. He knew this was a horrible idea. He should have never stepped over the line. He’s a horrible man. You don’t deserve someone as awful as him. 
He smacks his lips, making you and Joel come back down to Earth and out of your heads. 
“Whatever is happenin’ between you two, I probably will never fully understand it. But you are adults, you do whatever makes you happy,” He says with both hands up in surrender, “I am too old to bother with my daughter’s love life. She’s a big girl, I trust her. But Miller, if you hurt her-“
“I’m a dead man.”
Your father laughs which in turn makes you smile crookedly. 
“Just one thing,” He points to you, “I don't want to hear or see anythin’-”
You nod, cutting him off immediately, “Deal.”
Joel catches your eye when he smiles in your peripheral vision. You look over at him, a grin plastered to your face. 
You can’t believe you’re actually going to do this. 
And Joel can’t believe your father somewhat agreed to let it happen. He was sure he would have a gun in his face before he could even mutter a word. But instead, your Dad is receptive to him being with you, which is all you can ask for. 
“Well, get along now, I wanna get back to sleep. You two were keepin’ me up,” Your dad grumbles, readjusting his frail frame to get comfortable in bed. You just nod, pointing at the door for Joel to exit. You follow suit, closing the door behind you tightly, making sure it clicks. Joel stands in the darkness of the hallway, waiting. He is in disbelief. 
You just take one of his hands and bring it to your lips, softly pressing a kiss into his knuckles. 
“Let’s go get cleaned up and take a nap,” You murmur, walking him to the end of the hallway to the bottom of the stairs. He accepts the offer, trailing behind you like a lost puppy. 
You were not sure where this was all going to end up. Neither of you did. But you could not wait to carve the way with him, bringing every last one of your daydreams to life.
THE END
or is it? I have started writing snippets to go along with this story- if you want more, here's the link:
No One Fucks With My Baby
4K notes · View notes
oddballwriter · 10 months ago
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Calling Them your Husband
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Warnings: nothing really 
Author’s Snip: I just wanted to make some tooth-rotting fluff so enjoy
I’ll shut up now. Enjoy! And don’t be afraid to request.
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Steven Grant
When you call him your husband, it was originally a joke, sort of
Your friend called you while you were out doing errands with Steven and they asked what you were doing, to which you said "I'm out with my husband getting stuff done."
Steven just blushes and does that goofy little smile he does because he's never heard you say that but now he wants to hear it all the time now
You guys are in a long committed relationship together and you two have been living together for some time now but he's been too anxious to ask about possibly getting married some day. Not knowing if that's something you want or if you just want to cohabitate as a couple instead
But now that he heard you refer to him as your husband (even if it was a little joke) he wants to marry you in a heartbeat so that you can actually call him your husband and he can call you his wife/husband/spouse
He just thinks about it the whole day but doesn't say anything to see if you will call him that again in case pointing it out will cause you to stop. He is a bit more affectionate though, sneaking in a pick on the cheek or something and secretly making goo-goo eyes at you
When you get home and you aren't in range of seeing it Steven starts looking up engagement rings and prices to see which one would look nice on you and try and save up money
Steven also starts to subtly, at least as subtle as he can be, ask you about if you want to get married someday
He's such a dork though, bless his soul, in his brain he's just kicking his feet and giggling. He's looking at prices for venues and planners already.
Marc Spector
Marc has it in him to get married, we know that
But in his mind he doesn't really see himself as "husband material". He thinks that he's got too much baggage that you'd have to deal with if you were married
He acts like you two haven't been living together and splitting the bills and stuff, which is sometimes what marriage is, in the most domestic way possible
To him, he can't really see himself being able to do the whole marriage thing all over again
That was until some drunk creep was hitting on you while you and him were on a date and you told the guy "I'm with my husband" which warded that guy off
For some reason you calling him your husband while you locked your arm with his just washed those feelings of doubt out. Something about it just made him feel so confident
Like "Yeah I'm their husband! Back off!"
After that Marc was more open with himself about the idea of letting that title back into his life and getting to call you his spouse too
He more so likes the ability to call you his spouse. Possessiveness is in him and by god does getting to call you his spouse feed it
Marc will ask about the idea of marriage sometime after that just to see if you like it
If you want to get married then he's on board. But if you think cohabitating suits you better then he's fine with that too
So long as you're there together and you love him then he's content and happy
Jake Lockley
Damn right he's your husband
Honestly ever since you two got serious with your relationship, became committed to each other, and moved in he's just been like "We are married now" in his head
He's never said that out loud but he knows that the feeling is there with you too
It wasn't until you semi-jokingly called him your husband when some girls were checking him out and you huffed and puffed about it
"What's the matter? I wasn't flirting back." "Well, excuse me for not wanting some giggling college girls to be eyeing up my husband."
And that just... made him feel something, in his heart and in his pants
No but seriously. After that night cohabitating and acting like a married couple wasn't enough. He needs to put a ring on you and vice versa
He will go down to town hall and get those damn papers and buy the rings right now
Jake was originally just going to wait until you said that you wanted to get officially married, but he just can't anymore
In the morning you guys are going to buy rings, get the papers filled out, and planning the wedding
He's got the wedding planner on speed dial and a house with a picket fence in the nice part of town ready to go, just say "I do" please
Honestly at this point he never wants to hear his name come out of your mouth ever again. To you, it's either "hun" "hunny" "dear" or "sweetheart"
Light of his life, air in his lungs, fire in his loins
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Taglist: @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction
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nayziiz · 9 months ago
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Dreams | LN4
Pairing: Lando Norris x reader (she/her)
Author's note: I'm trying something a little bit different with shorter form fics, so please send through any requests or feedback. These one shots will likely not have a second part unless it really speaks to me to continue with it. Thank you!
Masterlist
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Lando's reputation for being able to sleep anywhere was legendary. Whether it was a noisy bus, a crowded airport terminal, or a bumpy aeroplane seat, he could effortlessly drift off into slumber while others struggled to find rest. It was a talent that often amused his friends and family, who marvelled at his ability to find peace in the most unlikely of places.
However, there were rare moments when even Lando found sleep elusive. These were the nights when his mind seemed to rebel against the tranquillity his body craved. Instead of surrendering to the gentle embrace of sleep, he found himself lying awake in the darkness, his thoughts swirling like a tempest in his mind.
On these occasions, the silence of the night only served to amplify the cacophony of thoughts that clamoured for his attention. Memories, worries, hopes, and fears jostled for prominence, each demanding to be heard. Lando would toss and turn, trying in vain to quiet the relentless chatter of his restless mind.
In the quiet darkness of the night, she sensed his restlessness, a subtle shift in his movements that spoke volumes without a word being spoken. As he rose to attend to the call of nature, she felt the absence of his warmth beside her, a fleeting moment of solitude that emphasised the stillness of the room.
When he returned, she instinctively reached out, her arm finding its way around his waist, seeking to offer comfort in the embrace of physical touch. She hoped that the closeness would ease his troubled mind, anchoring him to the present moment and soothing the restless thoughts that plagued him.
But despite her efforts, sleep remained elusive for him. As he rolled from one side to the other, she mirrored his movements, a silent dance of companionship in the darkness. With each turn, she felt the tension in his body, the weight of his worries pressing against her own skin.
Feeling the weight of responsibility pressing upon her, she knew she couldn't let his sleeplessness persist, especially with the looming journey ahead. The urgency of the situation propelled her into action, her mind racing with solutions to ease his troubled mind and usher him back into the embrace of sleep.
With each sigh that escaped his lips, she felt a surge of determination coursing through her veins. She couldn't stand to see him tossing and turning, his restlessness a palpable presence in the darkness. He needed sleep, and she was determined to help him find it.
“Lan,” she mumbled, her voice barely audible in the darkness.
“Mmh,” he hummed in response, his tone heavy with weariness.
“What's going on, baby?” she asked him, her concern evident in her voice.
“Nothing, just can't fall asleep again,” he lied, his words a feeble attempt to brush off her concerns.
“I know you better, Lan. Just tell me what's bothering you,” she implored, her voice gentle yet insistent. He sighed softly, feeling the weight of her gaze even in the darkness.
“It's just... everything,” he admitted, his voice tinged with vulnerability. She shifted closer to him, her hand finding his in the darkness.
“Talk to me,” she urged, her voice a soothing presence in the stillness of the night.
“My mind just won't shut off,” he told her, his voice heavy with frustration. “I'm constantly thinking of every bad thing that could possibly happen.”
“You're scared of your dreams?” she clarified, her voice gentle but probing, seeking to understand the depths of his anxiety. He hesitated for a moment, grappling with the vulnerability of his admission.
“Not just my dreams. "I'm scared of what lies beyond them, too. The uncertainty, the unknown…” he confessed, his words a whispered admission of his deepest fears. Her hand tightened around his, a silent gesture of solidarity in the face of his turmoil.
“It's okay to be scared, Lan,” she reassured him, her voice a soothing presence in the darkness. “Tell me about your dreams. Maybe that helps get them out of your system.
He hesitated, the weight of his nightmares heavy upon him. But her gentle encouragement urged him to speak, to release the demons that haunted his restless nights.
“Sometimes I dream of the plane crashing, or sometimes it's me in the car,” he began, his words halting as he recounted the terrifying scenarios that played out in his mind. “Other times, it's the two of us driving somewhere, and we crash.”
As he spoke, the images of his nightmares came flooding back, each scene more vivid than the last.
“Then I have dreams about you literally disappearing off the face of the planet, and I can't find you no matter how hard I try,” he confessed, his voice trembling with the raw emotion of his fears.
“Lan, you know bad things can happen at any moment,” she tried to reassure him, her voice filled with compassion. “We can try our best to avoid them, but if it's meant to happen, it will. I know this is probably not what you want to hear, but you can't dwell on them. It sucks the joy out of life, and you love life.”
Her words echoed in the stillness of the night, a gentle reminder of the fragility of existence and the resilience of the human spirit. Despite the darkness that threatened to engulf him, she offered him a glimmer of hope, a lifeline to cling to in the face of his fears.
He listened, the weight of her words sinking into his soul. In her voice, he heard the wisdom of someone who had faced their own demons and emerged stronger for it. And though the shadows of his fears still lingered, he felt a spark of courage ignite within him, a determination to embrace life in all its uncertainty.
“I love you more, though,” Lando countered, his voice filled with affection despite the weight of his worries.
“And I will say it as often as you need to hear it - I love you so much, Lando Norris. And I'm not going anywhere,” she told him, her words a steadfast declaration of her unwavering commitment. With a tender gesture, she kissed the tip of his icy nose, her touch a gentle reminder of the warmth of their love.
“Now don't let silly dreams keep you up all night,” she teased, her voice laced with playful affection.
In her embrace, he found solace, a sanctuary from the storms that raged within him. And as they settled into each other's arms, he felt a sense of peace wash over him.
He kissed her tenderly before he slipped away into a blissful slumber, his heart lighter knowing she was by his side. All he needed was her assurance, her unwavering love a beacon of comfort in the darkness of his fears.
As he drifted off into sleep, she marvelled at the paradox of his own nature. The fun-loving guy, known for his infectious laughter and zest for life, harboured within him a wellspring of fear and anxiety about the uncertainties of existence.
But in her arms, he found respite from the tumult of his thoughts, a sanctuary where he could lay down his burdens and simply be. For she saw him not just as the jovial persona he presented to the world, but as the complex, multifaceted individual he truly was.
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transmascaraa · 7 months ago
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may i please request genshin men (lyney, tighnari, cyno, and whoever else you'd like to add) with a jaded and distrustful reader. they're hesitant to entertain the idea of a relationship bc they don't believe it's genuine, the reader is scared they have ulterior motives. they've been hurt before and aren't about to let it happen again. because of this they act kind of standoffish to any advances they make. how would they win over the reader?
multiple characters headcannons!
distrust.
characters: lyney, tighnari, cyno, sethos x gn!reader
author's note: finally doing another req lmfao how are you guys😭 oh yeah and i want to try writing sethos cuz i haven't seen much including him at all or is it just me???? nvm it's worth a try
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♡ Lyney
-i think he would just accept it at first
-like "they don't trust me? well shit— i can't do anything about it"
-but lynette didn't want her brother feeling so sad because he'd annoyingly complain to her until they both died
-and she decided to kinda reassure him by saying that even tho the chances of you trusting him are low, doesn't mean that they're gone entirely WHICH MEANS there's still hope
-this makes him feel at least a bit better and that's when he actually starts making an effort
-he practices EXTREME and DANGEROUS magic tricks just to show them to you, not on any magic show for anybody else to see.
-extreme as in basically shoving a huge sword down his mouth, or as in literally throwing arrows in the sky, so that when they fall, they perfectly line out his silhouette, not hurting him in the slightest. because to him, apparently:
-near death experience=trust
-up to you if you trust him but honestly if i was that distrustful reader it wouldn't help lmfao
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✿ Tighnari
-i feel like he wouldn't be super interested in winning you over
-since like you literally don't trust him enough so what's the point
-but just MAYBE he'd try at least something
-he will try to win your trust by reassuring you when you need it, letting you know that you CAN trust him
-and that he's not a jerk or coward that would have ulterior motives
-so instead he doesn't rush you and lets you do what you wish
-even if you end up telling him to plainly 'fuck off' in the end, he'd be a little disappointed in himself but also he'd just accept it
-he won't force you into anything
-so in the end it'll all be up to you
-cuz he will do his best to show you that he won't hurt you in any way, and that he's loyal and trustworthy enough
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๑ Cyno
-happy 1day late bday to him he's literally my 2nd/3rd fave
-i think when you explain to him that you fear getting into a relationship at all for whatever reasons, he says he understands but will definitely subtly try to win you over
-telling you random jokes every day hoping that it would maybe help in earning your trust
-subtly showing you he has no evil plan by being there for you when you need it
-he'll ask tighnari for advice, and the advice he will get is "how am i supposed to know? appear more trustworthy i guess? make better jokes?" to which cyno will listen but that's already what he's trying to do on his own
-he'll ask to spar with you, trying to earn your trust in yet another way
-he feels reborn when you even slightly smile at his jokes btw so yeah
-soon enough, you catch on that he's trying to make you trust him.
-and after that, in the end, everything's up to you
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✯ Sethos
-is it just me but i love him sm i swear
-he will be persistent.
-understanding but persistent.
-not as subtle as cyno, but he will do it less often than cyno just because of the subtleness in the whole thing
-he'll definitely invite you on a walk with him throughout the desert like a few times a month
-loves it when you say 'yes'
-he will joke around with you, and make inside jokes with you, hoping that it means something to you
-maybe he'd ask you to spar together but would lose himself if you actually agreed(in a positive way ofc lmao)
-he's hoping so fucking much that he's presenting himself as loyal as possible to you
-if you don't want him in the end, that's completely fine with him
-but if you accept he'll look pretty much chill and happy with it but his brain and heart will be a mess lol
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was sethos ooc???? idk
do i care?? yes (a lot, in fact)
either way i'm alright with how i wrote this
| @mariaace <3
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il-miele-che-scrive · 1 year ago
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lando norris x reader
based on this request (because I take requests and I have to make it everyone's business): Hi not sure if you take requests but in case you do could you write reader x lando where y/n is a celebrity or an influencer and she drops subtle hints at who is her new bf maybe some fun facts about him like "oh he hates fish and I'm making a lot of fish for christmas" and eventually the fans are like "guys it's totally lando"
words count: 2.5k + fans' tweets at the end
author's note: my first request and it was so fun to write 🥹 also added a hospital scene from the time of Vegas GP so we could experience a bit of protective Y/n and painkillers-high Lando (I forgot about a fish scene)
edit: I've just realized I've messed up the dates so let's pretend the award thingie was in '23 instead of '22
A secret boyfriend
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It was a normal Tuesday of 2023 when Y/n Y/l/n and Lando Norris met. Well, not so normal since it was the day Y/n won the first award in her musical career, and Lando had his first debut as an award presenter.
"And the winner is..." He opened the envelope and flipped it, as he held it upside down. "Y/n Y/l/n."
Y/n couldn't believe it at first. She looked at her best friend with tears in her eyes. They hugged before Y/n stood up and got on her way to the scene, still questioning if she actually heard her name or was it her mind playing tricks on her.
"Thank you," Y/n sent Lando a smile as he handed her the award, "are you sure it's for me?" She joked, trying to mask the anxiety she felt from the fact that now she had to give a speech while everyone watched.
"Absolutely, it's all yours. Well deserved." Lando said feeling a bit starstruck from being so close to one of his favorite singers.
Just this one simple interaction was enough for both Y/n's and Lando's fanbases to raise suspicions. However, what was unavailable to the fans' eyes were Y/n and Lando's interaction at the after party. Later the same evening, he approached her.
"Hey, congratulations again." He said with a grin on his face. "Your music is amazing, I couldn't imagine you not winning this award."
"Stop with the compliments, I'm gonna blush." Y/n laughed. "Nice to meet you. Lando Norris, isn't it?"
"Yeah, do you watch Formula One?"
"I'm going to be honest from the beginning and admit I did not, but I did my research and I just might start being a fan."
"If you're ever down for hearing firsthand gossip straight from the track, I'm at your service."
"I'd love to hear all the gossip over a coffe sometime."
"Let me give you my number then and I'll arrange something."
And so a few days later they had a coffee date. The date marked the beginning of a carefully hidden romance. They wanted to keep it a secret from the public eye, not wanting people prying on them, trying to estimate how long they'll last.
Keeping the relationship secret somehow came easy to them. They were seen on the coffee date indeed, however they made sure to have the next dates in private. The fans on both sides were literally clueless to the whole ongoing romance. Y/n had her tour, Lando had his races and it wasn't even a little bit suspicious how a lot concerts aligned with race weekends.
Unfortunately, one day Y/n went live on Instagram with her best friend. Unfortunately, because Y/f/n didn't know how to keep her mouth shut. Unfortunately, because Y/f/n gave away the big secret.
"You know, guys, we're gonna use lives as a way to spend time together," she joked, "I've been feeling a bit abandoned since Y/n has been spending so much time with her boyfriend. Even on tour and with his busy schedule, can you believe this?"
Y/n's eyes widened. "Y/f/n!" She scolded her friend.
"What? It's a joke, no worries, I can see you're finally happy and I'm happy for you!"
"Y/f/n! You weren't supposed to say that!"
But the damage was already done. There was nothing Y/n could say to save the situation. So instead she decided to start dropping subtle hints for the fans to guess. Maybe it was the right time to make the relationship public after five months. They couldn't hide it forever.
Y/n started the hint game when she was on Jimmy Fallon's show.
"Y/n Y/l/n, everybody!" Jimmy announced when the girl walked in and sat down on the armchair. "I haven't seen you in a year and so much happened during this time!"
"I know, I know," Y/n said with a smile. "I'm so glad I could make a quick pit stop here on my way to Montreal."
"I'm happy to have you here. You won an award, you got a boyfriend. How- how did that happen?"
Y/n chuckled at Jimmy's question, realizing it was the perfect opportunity to play the hint game. "Oh, life takes unexpected turns and sometimes you find yourself on a fast track to happiness."
Jimmy raised an eyebrow, sensing there was more to the story. "Anything you'd like to share about this mystery man?"
"You know, Jimmy, I've finally found someone who knows how to navigate the twists and turns in life."
The audience laughed and the speculations among fans skyrocketed as they tried to connect the dots from Y/n's playful hints.
The other time, Y/n was on a popular radio show. The host couldn't help but ask about the latest reveal of a big secret.
"You were left hurting really badly after your previous relationship," he spoke, "it's really good to see you finally happy."
"It was a big thing for me. Still is." The girl admitted. "My previous relationship made it hard to open up to a man like that again."
"What made you do it eventually then?"
"I decided life is too short for keeping things in the slow lane," Y/n chuckled, "and when you meet someone that can belt out a Taylor Swift song with the same passion as you, it's hard not to fall for them."
"So your mystery man is a Swiftie too? Any chance we might know him?"
"Oh, I bet many people who are listening right now would know him."
"Now you got us all intrigued, your fans wouldn't forgive me if I didn't ask for more."
Y/n grinned, "Well, he's practically flawless, except for one little detail. He's a scorpio. And let me tell you, when we're playing our silly little racing video games, his competitive scorpio side really comes out. It's all fun and games until his racing pride is at stake."
The host laughed. "I'm sure fans are already trying to guess who this mystery gamer is. And you, are you competitive?"
"Yes, totally. He's more experienced than I am, but it doesn't mean I won't try my hardest to beat him."
"Is there any trait you don't share?"
The girl nodded, "Yes, one thing I'm secretly jealous of. He's quite known for being able to fall asleep in the most uncomfortable conditions. I wish I could do that. I'm all about pillows and comfy blankets, but he can just doze off anywhere, anytime."
A few days later, in the warmth of Lando's bedroom, surrounded by the hum of city life outside the windows, Y/n brought up the topic with a playful glint in her eyes.
"You know, Lando, fans have been buzzing lately. It's quite entertaining."
"Well, you have started this yourself," Lando laughed, laying his head in his girlfriend's lap.
"Not me, it was Y/f/n. I just went with it and turned it into something fun for myself." Y/n defended herself. Her fingers started gently playing with Lando's hair.
"You do seem to be having a great time, leading your fans on and all that," he joked. "Are there chances they'll solve your mystery anytime soon?"
"I've seen a few tweets accusing you of being my secret boyfriend, but most people don't really believe that."
"What?" He sit up dramatically. He continued in a fake-offended voice. "Do they think I'm not good enough?"
Y/n giggled.
Lando's mock offense turned into a playful pout. "I can't believe they're doubting my boyfriend potential. I mean, come on, look at me!" He gestured theatrically at himself.
Y/n burst into laughter, "Maybe we should give them a little more to work with, stir the pot a bit."
Lando leaned in, placing a quick kiss on Y/n's cheek. "You're a master of turning chaos into entertainment, you know that?"
"It's quite a compliment, coming from a Formula One driver."
Lando flashed a grin. "Well, we both have our talents, don't we? Maybe we should drop some subtle hints during a race?"
And so they waited months for the Grand Prix in Vegas, because that was where they could start rumours about getting married. Sure, they could get married spontaneously anywhere, but there was no better place than Las Vegas.
Thankfully they managed to keep the relationship secret all these months, breadcrumbing Y/n's fans. After the Vegas GP, Y/n and Lando where supposed to go for an afterparty, get 'drunk' and then 'married'.
Unfortunately, they plans changed the direction a bit with Lando's crash. Y/n's heart sank as she watched the unfolding drama on the big screens. The thrill of the race was replaced with concern for Lando's well-being. Plans for the afterparty and the playful hints about a fake marriage suddenly didn't matter anymore.
Emergency crews rushed onto the track, the anxious seconds felt like an eternity as they worked to help Lando get out of his racing car. Y/n's heart pounded in her chest, the world around her blurring. The fact that he managed to walk away from the car was a small comfort.
Y/n's phone buzzed moment after Lando disappeared from her sight.
from: Lando
I'm okay, they're taking me to st vincent's hospital. Will update you soon. Love you xx
to: Lando
Be there in a second, see you soon
A shaky exhale escaped Y/n, she felt slightly relief and ran towards the exit. She was sure Lando wasn't okay, not after that crash, but at least he was conscious and walking on his own (although it could be the adrenaline). A moment later, when Y/n got into her own car, her phone buzzed again.
from: Lando
Yknow you could post a pic from the hospital, that would stir the pot
Y/n smiled at the massage. If he could think of that, he might had been better than she thought.
The neon lights of Las Vegas blurred as she drove through the city streets, trying to get to the hospital as quick as possible. Despite the speed, the journey seemed to stretch in time.
Arriving at St. Vincent's hospital, Y/n rushed through the entrance, her heart pounding. The reception area looked like a maze in her anxious state, but she managed to find a nurse.
"I'm here for Lando Norris," the girl said.
The nurse looked her up and down. "Are you his family?"
"I'm his girlfriend."
"Then, unfortunately, I cannot let you see him."
"His family is in Europe, I'm the closest to family you can get here in Vegas."
"The closest, but not family. I'll ask you nicely to wait here for further information."
Y/n nodded with an angry expression on her face. She sat down in the waiting room, pulling out her phone and dialing the number of her manager.
"Hey, Mia," the singer said. "I need you to do something." Urgency and frustration were visible in her voice.
"What's going on, Y/n? Are you okay?" Mia's concerned voice came through the line.
"It's Lando. He's been in a crash during the race in Vegas, and they've taken him to St. Vincent's Hospital. I'm here, but they won't let me in because I'm not 'family.' That's so stupid."
"I'm sorry, Y/n, but I still don't see what you want me to do."
"I want you to make a donation for the hospital from my account. Send them like $100,000. I think it'll be enough to let me in."
"Okay, I'll take care of it."
"Thanks, Mia. I appreciate it more than you know."
Y/n took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. Anxiety lingered in the air. But there was no way they wouldn't let her in after that.
Y/n didn't know how much time had passed. She felt as if all she did was staring at a wall in front of her, ocassionally moving her eyes to the floor or the ceiling. She was fidgeting with her fingers as the same nurse approached her.
"Miss Y/l/n, you're allowed to see Mr Norris in the room 305."
Without a word, Y/n rushed to the room. She found Lando lying in the hospital bed, his gaze turning towards the door as she walked in.
"Lando." Y/n breathed his name, rushing to his side and taking his hand in hers. "I was so worried. And they didn't want to let me in at first."
He managed a dazed smile, his eyes slightly glazed. "Hey, you're real, right? This isn't happening in my head?"
Y/n chuckled. "Yes, I'm real. It's me."
He squinted at her. "You sure? You look like a beautiful hallucination."
"Well, if I'm a hallucination, at least a beautiful one."
"I feel like I'm floating on marshmallow clouds, but you're the most beautiful marshmallow I've ever seen."
Y/n couldn't help but laugh. "I think you might be on some strong painkillers, love."
"Ah, that explains the marshmallows. They're having a party in my head," Lando said with a dreamy expression.
Y/n burst into laughter, the tension of the earlier moments disappearing in the room.
"Did you know," Lando continued, "that racing is like trying to catch a rainbow? And if you're lucky, you might find a pot of gold at the end."
"Is there an Irish leprechaun as well?"
"I wouldn't be surprised. Maybe that's who's been guiding me all this time."
"You gotta ask him to make the rainbow less slippery next time then."
He nodded solemnly. "I'll have a serious talk with him. No more slippery rainbows, only smooth, marshmallow clouds."
As they joked around, Y/n couldn't ignore the quiet concern for Lando's well-being. She gently brushed his hair away from his forehead. "You scared me, you know? Seeing you crash like that."
"I'm sorry, love. I didn't mean to scare you. I promise I'll be more careful next time. But you have to promise me something too.""
"What is it?"
"You'll visit me in the marshmallow cloud world sometimes. It gets lonely up there."
Y/n laughed, leaning in to press a gentle kiss on his cheek. "I'll visit anytime you want."
"You know, even in the middle of all this craziness, having you here feels like finding that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow."
As the night carried on, the hospital room became a cocoon shielding them from everything that layed outside its walls. Y/n found herself falling asleep on an armchai next to Lando's bed.
In the quiet ambiance of the night, Lando's mind wandered through the whimsical landscapes of his medication-induced thoughts. He couldn't help but marvel at the coincidence that brought Y/n into his life.
It all started with handing her an award. It seemed like it happened a whole lifetime ago and now, there they were, in the middle of marshmallow clouds.
Y/n, nestled in the armchair, breathed softly in her sleep, completely unaware of Lando's reflections. Soon enough, Lando allowed himself to succumb to the gentle pull of sleep as well.
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tswhiisftteedr · 10 months ago
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Carmilla x reader NSFW? Specifically, eating out after a long day at work. The two going a few rounds from the pent-up stress?
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I’m pissed, please take care of me ☆ One shot
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☆ Employer!Carmilla Carmine x Employee!Fem!Reader:
After a shitty day at work, you and your boss who is simultaneously your girlfriend, decide to let the days stress go by ‘working out’ your frustrations.
Warnings: Mature Content, Explicit/Graphic Language, Praise kink, Oral Sex(Both Female Parties Receiving), Bad Spanish, NOT PROOFREAD.
Words: 2549
Note: So this a combination of 3 requests, sorry @hyenalover2630 if you don’t like this cuz that’s not what you asked for, I did a one shot instead of headcannon so sorry agin but I though rounding up similar requests would be a smart move. Also this one shot is a bit on the shorter side so that’s that.
Author Note: Soooo, I’m back from the dead, 38 request in my inbox, 15 of them being just Adam requests lol.
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☆ more under the cut. ☆
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Finding yourself in hell was more than just a lousy situation—it was a downright nightmare. Amidst the chaos, the moral decay, and the ridiculous housing prices, you were desperate for any job that could keep you afloat. You applied everywhere, except under Valentino; you wanted no part of that mess.
So, it wasn't surprising when you ended up as a grunt in the marketing department at Carmine Inc. But you were a hustler, always quick, efficient, and responsible. Your work ethic didn't go unnoticed, especially by the big boss herself.
You couldn't help but admire her in many ways. She was a badass, running a successful business with an iron fist, yet she had a sense of fairness. And let's not forget, she was easy on the eyes, which only fueled your crush.
After a meeting she personally set up, you scored a promotion to be her personal assistant. But even with the big leap, you didn't slack off. Your efficiency was still on point, and Carmilla appreciated it.
As your role in the company evolved, so did your connection with Carmilla. It all started with those little touches—a hand on your shoulder here, a pat on the head there—that seemed innocent enough at first.
But soon, those gestures became more frequent and intimate, like her guiding hand on your waist or the way she'd ask you to stick around after hours for a chat and a drink.
The formalities started to fade away, with Carmilla calling by your first name and encouraging you to do the same, replacing your usual ‘Mme. Carmine’ by the overlords name. It was like she was inviting you into her inner circle, blurring the lines between boss and friend.
As the months passed and you continued to excel in your role as her assistant, Carmilla couldn't help but notice a shift in her feelings toward you. Your hard work and dedication were undeniable, but it was more than that. She found herself drawn to you in a way she hadn't expected. Plus, the fact that you were a beautiful woman did help in growing her attraction for you.
It became increasingly obvious to Carmilla that you harbored feelings for her as well. Your nervousness whenever she was around spoke volumes, manifesting in stutters and how you would visibly warm up whenever her gaze met yours. It was a telltale sign of the attraction brewing beneath the surface.
Furthermore, she couldn't ignore your subtle cues for validation and compliments. You seemed to thrive on her words of affirmation, going above and beyond in your tasks just to earn a simple ‘great job’ or ‘I'm proud of you, Y/N’ from her lips. ‘And who could blame you? With Carmilla being the hot Hispanic woman she was, who wouldn't want her singing their praises?’
After two months of silently pining for each other, where Carmilla was keenly aware of your feelings while you remained oblivious to hers, she decided it was time to break the stalemate. She orchestrated a meeting after hours, summoning you to her office to address the unspoken tension between you.
As you sat down, she wasted no time in getting to the point. With a mix of nerves and determination, she confessed her own feelings, revealing that she had long known about yours as well. It was a moment of vulnerability for both of you, but also a turning point.
The conversation didn't end there. Carmilla proposed taking a chance on each other, suggesting that you go on a date that weekend to explore the potential of your connection further. You agreed, feeling a mix of excitement and apprehension at what lay ahead.
The subsequent dates were nothing short of magical, filled with laughter, deep conversations, and shared moments of intimacy. With each passing day, your bond grew stronger, and it became increasingly evident that what you shared was more than just a fleeting attraction.
By the fifth date, it was abundantly clear to both of you that you wanted to take things to the next level. Over a candlelit dinner, you shared your hopes and dreams, expressing your desire to make things official. And as you toasted to your newfound love, you knew in your heart that you had found something special amidst the chaos of your workplace.
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Despite the enchanting aura that surrounded your relationship with Carmilla that usual had you on cloud nine, today proved to be shitty day nevertheless.
First, there was the debacle with the rogue shipment. Some brainless thugs decided to mess with a Carmine truck, oblivious to the glaring logo emblazoned on its side. Needless to say, they met their demise, but not before causing a heap of trouble.
Then came the catastrophe with the catalog files—a rookie managed to obliterate an entire folder of vital content. The painstaking recovery process left you on edge, uncertain if the files would return unscathed or corrupted.
And if that wasn't enough, that blasted Vox bastard had the audacity to cancel yet another meeting with Carmilla, marking the third time in a row. The gall of him, treating her time as if it were disposable. You couldn't stand that attention-seeking-whore man-child with his oversized ego and incessant need for validation.
As the day dragged on, you finally collapsed onto your bed, still fully dressed save for your shoes. Frustration, exhaustion, and pent-up tension weighed heavily on your shoulders. It was a relief when Carmilla entered the room, her expression mirroring your own.
With a sigh of resignation, she joined you on the bed, her presence offering a sense of comfort amidst the chaos. In that moment, without a word exchanged, you found solace in each other's presence, united in your shared frustration and exhaustion.
Sighing heavily, Carmilla reached for the bottle of beezeljuice resting on the nightstand, taking a generous swig before passing it over to you. You accepted the bottle, mirroring her earlier gesture as you took a deep gulp, relishing in the familiar burn as the liquid slid down your throat. It was a small but comforting ritual, a shared moment of indulgence amidst the chaos of the day.
As the evening steadily slipped away, the weight of your troubles began to dissolve, replaced by a gentle warmth that spread through you like wildfire. You found yourselves leaning closer, your bodies pressed together as you sought solace in each other's embrace. Your lips met in a heated kiss, passion exploding between you like a bolt of lightning.
Your tongues danced a fiery tango, exploring every inch of each other's mouths with a fervor that belied your exhaustion. As your hands wandered, exploring the curves of each other's bodies, you couldn't help but feel a renewed sense of hope. Despite the challenges and tribulations that the afterlife threw at you, you were a force to be reckoned with.
"Acércate, mi amor," Carmilla murmured against my lips, her voice low and sultry as she pulled you closer. "Today has been a living nightmare, but your presence makes everything better. You're the wind beneath my wings, my sweet girl."
Her praise was music to your ears, making your heart flutter and your cheeks flush in delight. To hear her speak such kind words, to know that you brought light into her day was like floating on cloud.
Unable to contain your desire any longer, you broke your kiss, your breaths ragged and hearts pounding in sync. Carmilla's eyes smoldered with hunger as she reached for the buttons of my shirt, skillfully releasing each one until it pooled at my feet. Your undergarments followed suit, leaving you naked and vulnerable in her capable hands.
In turn, you mirrored her actions, slowly peeling away layers of her clothing until she stood before you in nothing but her ballet slippers and stockings. Her skin glowed under the dim light, her statuesque figure an ode to her grace and power. As you gazed upon her, you felt a raw, unbridled hunger stir within you, a primal urge to taste her.
"Mi alma," Carmilla whispered, her voice trembling with anticipation. "Can you be the good girl i know you are, take care me? Will you be a sweetheart and eat me out?."
Without hesitation, you knelt before her, her scent enveloping you as you parted her legs and settled between them. Your fingers traced delicate paths along her calves, sending shivers down her spine.
As you approached her core, Carmilla's fingers threaded through your hair, guiding your head between her legs with an air of completely control that sent shivers down your spine. You reveled in her power over you, knowing that she desired to be in charge, to assert her authority in this moment of vulnerability.
"That's it, mi vida," she purred, her voice a seductive symphony that resonated throughout the room. "Show me how much you love pleasing me."
Your tongue flicked out, teasing the sensitive skin at the apex of her thighs, drawing a gasp from her lips. Her hands tightened in your hair, urging you forward as you dove between her legs. The taste of her was divine, almost making your head spin.
Carmilla moaned softly, her thighs clenching as you explored her folds with reverence. Each stroke of your tongue was deliberate, each flick a testament to your devotion. Her groans of pleasure echoed around you, a symphony of lust that only heightened your desire to please her.
“Eso es todo, lo estás haciendo tan bien, fuck! Keep going, my beautiful girl.”
As you delved deeper, your tongue probing the depths of her pussy, Carmilla's moans grew louder, her body arching with each stroke. Her fingers twisted in your hair further, grinding you against her with a firm hand that you hungered for. This display of dominance was intoxicating, igniting a fire within you that mirrored her own passion.
"Just like that, mi corazón," she encouraged, her voice thick with lust. "You’re being such a good girl for me.”
Your actions became more fervent, your lips and tongue working in concert to bring her pleasure. Her hips bucked in response, her sighs and gasps filling the room with the soundtrack of our passion. You reviled in her reactions, feeding off her energy as you explored every inch of her tender flesh.
Carmilla's breath hitched, her grip on your hair stronger than ever before as she neared her climax. Her body trembled beneath you, her whispered praises— ‘That’s my girl’, ‘So proud of you, you’re doing such a great job’, ‘I love you so much my beautiful girl’— urging you onward.
As she reached her peak, Carmilla's back arched, her moans filling the room like a thunderous roar, “¡Ya me vengo!”. Her body convulsed, her climax washing over her in waves of ecstasy. You took pride in the role you had played in her release, revelling in her praises as she came down from her high.
Panting, she pulled you upward, her lips claiming yours in a searing kiss that left no doubt as to the power she held over you and the loved you share. "Great job, my love," she breathed against your lips. "Your tongue truly is a work of art."
Then, without warning, Carmilla reversed your roles. With a swift motion, she pushed you onto your back, her eyes gleaming with newfound determination. Your heart raced as she positioned herself between your legs, her gaze never leaving yours.
"Now, it's your turn," she growled, her voice deep and sensual. "Spread your legs for me, Y/N."
You obeyed without a moment of resistance, your nerves jangling with anticipation as she lowered her head. Her tongue darted out, tracing a path that sent shivers cascading through you.
Each touch was electric, her tongue exploring every inch of your body with a precision that left you breathless. Her absolute control and expertise was entrancing, and you craved more. Your hands gripped the sheets, seeking purchase as she continued her exploration.
With every lick and suck, you grew closer to the edge, your moans mingling with her satisfied hums. It wasn't long before you could bear it no longer, and with a “Go for it, sweet girl”, your body thrashed beneath hers as you climaxed. Waves of pleasure washed over you, leaving you weak and breathless.
When you finally came down from your high, Carmilla lifted her head, her eyes gleaming with satisfaction. "Perfect," she purred, her voice a siren's song that enchanted you as if you were a sailor.
As soon as your senses were regained, Carmilla had wasted no time in resuming her ministrations. Her tongue dove back into the folds of my heat, her appetite for pleasure seemingly insatiable. You writhed beneath her, unable to contain the surge of pleasure that coursed through me.
Her fingers dug into your hips, holding you steady as she feasted on you with unwavering passion. Your moans filled the room once more, intertwining with her satisfied grunts. The intensity of her attack overwhelmed you, pushing you to the brink once more.
Overstimulated by her persistent attention, you cried out as you climaxed once more, your body shaking with the force of the experience. When you finally came down, panting heavily, Carmilla released you, her eyes shining with victory.
"Now, that's what I call some well spent frustration," she said, her voice still thick with desire yet quite comforting and sweet. "What do you say we take a moment to catch our breath?"
You nodded, your body still trembling from the intensity of the intercourse. As you lay there, your hearts pounding in sync, you couldn't help but marvel at the relationship you shared. Despite you differences, your love had brought you together in a way that felt both natural and exhilarating.
Carmilla's hand traced lazy circles on your stomach, her thumb brushing across your navel as she gazed into your eyes.
The quiet was a welcome relief, but there was something eating at you that you just had to vent about. "Okay, but seriously, that Vox dude is a major asshole, right? I mean, he's practically begging for a meeting and then bails three freaking times in a row. Am I the only one who thinks that TV demon is just a whiny little prick?”
"Mi amor, the beacon of my day and the guiding star of my night—" Carmilla responded emphatically. "I couldn't fucking agree more with you. That guy, and his associates, are just a bunch of overgrown kids with way too much damn power for anyone's good. If it weren't for you and my daughters, I swear to Santa Maria I'd probably have blown my fucking brains out by now dealing with their goddamn irresponsible behavior.”
After Carmilla's passionate outburst, silence descended once again, but it didn't last long. Before you knew it, both of you were erupting into fits of laughter, finding humor in the absurdity of it all.
You both instinctively drew closer, holding each other tighter than before. Despite the shitty day you had endured, there was comfort in each other's embrace.
As you nestled against each other, a thought crossed your mind: ‘maybe karma was real after all.’ If finding reassurance in Carmilla's arms was your reward after such a terrible day, perhaps the universe's scales were fairer than you had previously believed.
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Thanks anons and @hyenalover2630 for requesting!
©tswhiisfttedr. dn translate, or plagiarize.
Tip Me (Ko-Fi) & And support my art account @maviscarlettie
You can now commission me!
Reblogs help!!! (Request Are On Pause)
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wadewnstonwilson · 3 months ago
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the proposal themed deadpool headcanons || suggestion by anonymous
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pairing: wade wilson (deadpool) x shittyboss!reader
author note: let me know if you guys want me to make this into an actual fic!! also would love to make more headcanons in the future featuring logan or wade so please feel free to drop me an ask!
from the start, your dynamic with wade is charged with fiery banter. you throw cutting remarks his way, and instead of being intimidated or deterred, wade eats it up. he takes every insult as flirtation, his eyes gleaming with excitement as he responds with his usual sarcasm. “oh , sweetheart, if you keep talking to me like that, I might just fall in love. wait , too late!"
whenever you give wade instructions, he’ll purposely do the opposite or twist your words to irritate you—just for the fun of seeing you snap. he thrives off your anger and frustration. “you want me to file that? oops , shredded it instead. oh well, guess i’ll just have to stay late to help you fix it.”
no matter how many times you tell wade to leave you alone or stop annoying you, he never takes the hint. it’s the thrill of the chase for him, and your cold demeanor only fuels his desire. "you look like you want to murder me, and honestly, i’m into it. fair warning, it’s gonna be real hard to get rid of me.”
wade loves the power struggle between the two of you. you try to keep him in line with your sharp professionalism, but wade enjoys testing your limits. he’ll go out of his way to undermine your authority, all while throwing you a smirk that says, *what are you going to do about it?*
as much as you try to push wade away, there’s a part of you that enjoys using him when the tension becomes unbearable. he catches on immediately, loving every second of it. to him, this back-and-forth is the best kind of foreplay. “you say you don’t want me, but those late-night calls say otherwise. it’s okay, i’ll wait as long as it takes for you to admit it.”
one day, you finally snap. wade messes up yet another task, you berate him, your frustration boiling over. you throw in a comment about his laziness and his inability to get anything right, only for wade to go uncharacteristically quiet. that’s when you realize he’s dyslexic, and it wasn’t just him being insubordinate for the sake of it.
learning about wade’s dyslexia changes something in you. you still throw biting comments his way in public, but behind closed doors, you’re a little softer. when it’s just the two of you, your tone shifts from condescending to slightly more understanding. wade notices right away, and of course, he doesn’t let it slide. “oh no, you’re being nice to me now. deep down, you love me.”
while you maintain your cold, business-like demeanor in front of others, when it’s just you and wade, you occasionally let your guard down. you don’t apologize outright for your earlier comment, but you do acknowledge his struggles in your own way, making sure to leave clear instructions and offer him subtle help. wade, surprisingly, appreciates it, even though he’ll tease you mercilessly for it. "aww , you do care. next thing you know, you'll be knitting me sweaters and packing me lunches."
with the shift in your dynamic, wade becomes even more determined to win you over. your softer moments fuel his desire to be around you, but he still pushes your buttons constantly because that’s what keeps things exciting for him. “you’re going to crack one of these days and fall for me, and trust me, i’ll be here to catch you when it happens. maybe in my arms, maybe in bed, your choice.”
wade picks up on the fact that, despite your tough exterior, you have moments of empathy and understanding. it makes him fall harder for you, though he’d never say it outright. instead, he shows it in his own way—by being a little more helpful (but only when no one’s looking) and cutting down on his insubordination just a bit when he knows you’re having a rough day. "see? not all bad. just 95% bad. the other 5% is reserved for when you finally come to your senses and realize I’m perfect for you."
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wo8ngs · 3 months ago
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%﹒IN SICKNESS & IN HEALTH! ( in which a certain mercenary takes care of you while you're sick . ) author's note ⤷ sooo, i'm sick right now, and honeslty, all i want is a bit of comfort while i'm feeling icky ! naturally, that led to me wanting to write about ada being the one to take care of you while you're feeling awful, because why not? plus, i wanted to self - indulge a little bit !
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though ada isn't openly affectionate, there’d be small, almost unnoticed gestures—maybe she'd run a hand through your hair as you’re dozing off or adjust your pillow without saying anything. it’s all about the little moments, those moments of vulnerability you wouldn’t see but moreso feel.
on that note, ada doesn't show worry like most people, but there are rare moments—maybe when she sees you shivering or struggling with a fever—where those walls that she has built up so carefully starts to fall ever so slightly. it’s like it’s fleeting, almost like one of those indistinguishable look of concern that reminds you she cares, even if she doesn’t say it outright.
she wouldn't hover or ask how you're feeling every five minutes. instead, she'd stay nearby, watching over you to ensure you're getting better. more specifically, ada would communicate more with her actions than her words—turning down the lights if you’re resting, leaving a cool cloth by your bedside. anything you needed, she would do for you.
ada would maybe also make you a traditional chinese soup, like silkie chicken soup. she wouldn’t do it as a comforting gesture, but because she knows it’s effective in terms of high nurtient contents and she wants you to recover quickly so she can refocus on her work.
if anyone ever tried to bother you while you were sick—work, calls, or even friends—ada would be quick to shut it down. she would want to make sure you had the peace and quiet you needed to recover from being sick, and would even take it in her own hands to see that nothing disrupts you getting better.
if you tried to brush off your sickness or push yourself too hard, ada would be the one to firmly insist you rest. she wouldn’t let you get very far when it comes to protesting against her wishes. she’d give you one of those stares and say something like, “don’t be stubborn. you need rest,” always with that authoritative tone. and of course, you listen.
she is ada wong, through and through, and sometimes it might seem to disappear for hours, making you wonder where she went. however, she always makes sure she checks in on you from afar, giving you space while ensuring you’re okay. she doesn’t crowd you, but she’s always nearby, just in case.
there may not be a lot of emotional involvement on her part, but she would make sure you were taken care of. her care for you when you’re sick would be subtle, because she wants to make sure she doesn’t draw attention to the fact that she’s taken time from her work. there’s always a sense that she’s holding back, never fully letting you into her world or who she is behind the name.
but don’t be fooled, deep down, ada would feel a slight guilt for not being fully present in the relationship when you’re sick, but her dedication to her work overshadows any personal attachments. she knows she can’t afford to lose focus, so she compartmentalizes, offering you care when she can before slipping back into her own world.
once you do start to recover from your sickness, ada would quickly slip back into her more aloof, composed self. she wouldn't coddle you or prolong the care—once you’re on the mend, it’s back to business as usual, with that expectation that you’ll be able to pull yourself together. but deep down, you’d know that if you got sick again, she'd be there.
© wo8ngs / do not repost, copy, steal, etc., any of my work and claim it as your own.
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schrodinger-swriter · 11 months ago
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pspspsp hey bestie its me again
may we have a similar post to the pining alastor one, but make it sir pentious *leans on expensive car*
Sir Pentious and the Reader crushing on one another
I'm going to sell your car/lh/j
Not much to put here in the author's note, not many thoughts rattling inside my skull at the moment. I may write off some random headcanons between requests, don't have much planned today.
This post turned out a little longer than intended, but I believe that may be because I'm biased for Sir Pentious
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Going off of how we see him in the series in regards to his crush on Cherri Bomb, he's not the most subtle nor the most... straight forward, unless push comes to shove. He looks at you like you're one of the most beautiful people he's ever met. His usual energy of putting himself out there and making his presence known quickly tones down, instead being replaced by one that's more unsure and quiet. Everyone knows he has a little crush on you. How could they not? It's a little sad to watch, honestly, with many of the other sinners rolling their eyes and groaning when he approaches you and attempts to confess his heart out to you.. only to quickly try to turn around and change the subject.
He's the one who always checks in on you first, and the most. Oftentimes giving you handmade gifts and small inventions based around things he has heard you enjoyed, even in passing. I think he would remember even the smallest detail about you, no matter how obscure or how long ago you mentioned it.
The only way you wouldn't notice is if you were just as oblivious.
If you show hints to him that you're interested, it's likely he'd be just as oblivious. For Sir Pentious, you're going to need to be blunt and open in order for any relationship to start up.
I don't think he would downplay or deny his feelings if someone were to tease him about his crush. Actually, he would defend you and begin listing out the things he finds attractive about you. He does stammer a little and shrink into himself if he knows you're around, though. Perhaps tries to respectfully say you're amazing in a way that hopefully doesn't scream "I'm in love with you,"
But if someone were to go after you? He would get into it and try to defend your honor to the best of his ability... which... depending on the other sinner, may lead to a little bit of a physical conflict.
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waitingonher · 2 years ago
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Hi can you do some Percy Jackson x Hades Child hc?
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percy jackson dating a child of hades
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pairing: percy jackson x child of hades!reader
content warning: cursing
word count: 780
author's note: sorry this one's a bit shorttt
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a son of poseidon and a child of hades? ANOTHER POWER COUPLE. 
everyone knows not to mess with either one of you, or else they’re in for a doozy. 
percy’s always making sure that you’re not overworking yourself. he saw what it did to nico, so he for sure does not want that happening to you too. 
he’ll usually ask in more subtle and casual ways like “training was rough yesterday, how’d you sleep?” or “the lunch selection was good today, what’d you think?” 
it may be overbearing to some, but percy honestly can’t help it. the very last thing he wants is you being too hard on yourself. 
when you two first started dating, you guys—for some reason—decided to make gardening your little thing together?? but when you had accidentally killed them with your aura, you and percy decided to go forward with something a little less…alive. 
LOL so now your guys’ little thing is baking!! 
somehow chiron allowed you and him to use the camp kitchen?? 
anyways, you guys are pretty much pro bakers now! well, if you ignore the time when percy mistook the salt for sugar, then you guys are basically pros. 
you reach your hand out to your boyfriend, “perce, pass me a cookie.” “here,” he passes you a cookie while grabbing himself one, “on the count of three?”  you nod and begin counting, “one, two, three.” taking a bite of the warm cookie, you both immediately realize something’s wrong. the cookie tastes…salty? you see percy’s eyes widen as you two make a dash towards the sink.  “oh my gods! why is it salty?” percy screeches, the chewed up cookie muffling his voice.  after what felt like years of rinsing your mouth, the unpleasant salty taste had left your mouth, “babe, you were in charge of the dry ingredients...so did you use the salt instead of the sugar?”  percy’s eyes widen to the size of saucers, “no…i’m not that stupid. look,” he grabs the plastic container and turns it around, only to reveal the label that reads ‘salt’, "oh…yeah, that’s my bad.” 
considering the reputation your dad has, percy’s always looking out for you. but don’t get me wrong, everyone at camp could not give less of a shit about your dad, but it’s the newcomers he worries about. 
some of the new kids are so bold??? but don’t worry, cuz you and percy ALWAYS find ways to humble them. 
percy’s the type of bf to have almost anything you may need on hand. you need a hair tie? he’s pulling one off his wrist. your lips are chapped? he’s taking out his aquaphor. 
he loves seeing you use your powers, because like…pretty gf who has cool powers over the dead?? what is there not to love??
sometimes when you two are training, you’ll look out the corner of your eye to see your boyfriend just staring at you? percy has ZERO shame and will stare at you whenever he feels like it. 
whenever you guys have sleepovers, he always makes sure you fall asleep before him. it’s more of a comfort thing for him. percy just sleeps better knowing that you’re already sleeping. 
normally he’s a pretty light sleeper, but around you, he’s an even lighter sleeper. he just wants to make sure that he’ll be awake to comfort you in case you have any particularly alarming dreams. 
when you two eat, he never fails to save and offer the last bite to you. but percy doesn’t want you to feel bad about you eating his last bite, so he just nonchalantly offers it to you. 
movie nights with percy!!! 
you’d make him watch all the classic horror movies. shit talking the ones with bad acting and graphics is your guys’ favorite pastime. 
“oh my gods,” percy groans for the umpteenth time, “i swear, it’s probably a mortal who made this movie. they can’t even get the stupid ghosts to look right.”  you laugh at percy’s passion for complaining, “literally! okay but can they get some other guy to play the main character?” 
at this point, you two should make your own horror movie because you’re too busy making fun of them instead of actually enjoying them. 
you also made percy watch tusk… 
ever since watching it, he can’t look at walruses the same. (me too percy)  
gods forbid he runs into one in the ocean. 
percy also has a cork board in his cabin with a shit ton of polaroids on it jdfsksd 
they range from pictures with you to pictures of the sunsets.
but if you pay attention, you’ll find that the majority of the photos include you in them <33
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alessiamalfoyzabini · 10 months ago
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Vampire's Kiss | Chapter Two
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Pairing | Vampire!Jungkook x Reader
Word Count | 4,4k
Warnings | +18, MC feels a lot of anxiety but Jimin is there for her, she feels inferior under the gaze of the Park family, Mr. Park and Mrs. Park are horrible people, Jungkook enters the scene 👀👀👀👀, attraction (for now only this)
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⤷ Summary | Humans have finally unveiled and accepted the centuries-old existence of vampires, in a modern world people share their lives with these peculiar and mysterious creatures, but it is not all roses.
Will two souls belonging to such different species be able to be together?
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➢ Author's Note | The second chapter of Vampire's Kiss is here, and Jungkook finally arrives! 👀 Let me know what you think of the story, it is very important to me 🥰❤️
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Taglist: @katherine-kookie, @peterstarkchrishiddleston
Taglist is open!
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Chapter List - Previous - Next
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You are nervous, strolling through your living room back and forth, waiting for the boy who would accompany you to the party, you have worn a simple little black dress for the occasion and heels of the same color, you are the picture of understated and elegant simplicity, your hair instead is tied up in a soft bun that leaves your neck free, except for the thin silver necklace you are wearing.
Yet you do not feel beautiful, whatever you wore would not have served with the Parks, they would always see you the same way, as trash unworthy to stand beside their only son.
In some ways it's for the best, Jimin will get what he wants right away and you'll get out of the way, but it still hurts to be judged that way by people who don't even know you.
You hear the doorbell ring and check yourself one last time in the mirror in the main hallway, your lipstick and mascara are also in place, you take one last breath and go to the door, finding Jimin in all his glory in front of you.
He is wearing a white shirt that is slightly open across the chest, with smartly cut close-fitting pants and a jacket of the same material, his hair is pulled back, leaving his perfectly distended forehead exposed. He is a vision.
He is also wearing a necklace, the pendant of which depicts a silver dagger.
"Wow ... you look simply stunning," he says with a huge smile that brings his eyes to smile in turn.
"Thank you, you always are," you chuckle in response, he shakes his head.
"I'm used to girls giving me compliments, but when the compliments come from you they taste better" a subtle reference to whether you were such a bitch that you rarely gave him any?
Possibly.
He extends his arm to you, which you gladly take and together you leave your apartment.
"I'm sure the best are your girlfriend's," you say casually, curious to see how he would react. You are not surprised by the devoted look that outlines his features. That's just the way Jimin is, he gives the impression of being a hardened playboy, but he gives his heart and soul to his better half.
"Yes, the best ones are Nari's."
From there on, the walk to his car, an Audi TT Coupe, is fairly quiet on both of your parts, only the sound of your heels tapping on the asphalt bridges a bit the little space that divides both of you, you clasp your stole over your shoulders, not because you feel cold, it's a way to protect yourself from whatever would happen. It is strange to stand arm in arm with Jimin, dressed up and ready to threaten his parents with marriage if they did not heed his wish. It is strange to stand arm in arm with Jimin knowing that he has a real girlfriend awaiting his triumphant return.
Nari. She sounds familiar, you've heard her name before.
You can't think beyond that, Jimin unlocks the doors and the scent of new and clean welcomes you inside the Audi, Jimin adores the car just like a daughter, and you wouldn't be surprised to learn that only a few people have had the opportunity to climb aboard.
The boy makes the turn and finally gets behind the wheel, the sound of the engine being started catches you slightly off guard, Jimin gives you a mischievous look.
"Excited?"
You stare at him with wide eyes, "You shouldn't say such things now that you have a girlfriend, you know?" Jimin's smirk disappears immediately, and there you feel guilty.
"Wow...my human girlfriend bites like a wolf," he whispers, a boulder settles on your chest when he says so, "Hey...it'll be okay, I told you it's just for tonight, yeah?"
You nod, but you still have something to ask him.
"Does she know? That I'm going to pose as your girlfriend, I mean."
The last thing you want is to antagonize his real girlfriend, too.
"Of course she knows, she said anything goes as long as it works," he sighs looking at the traffic in front of him, "You're our last hope for a happy ending, if this doesn't work either.... it will mean that I will give up my name and my rights as an heir, I have a job and my boss is also my best friend, no matter what, I won't be in trouble" he mutters darkly.
Of course, Jimin does this for his parents, even if outdated, he loves them and wants to have a chance to stay by their side, how can you blame him.
You also love your father and mother, even though your father does not see eye to eye with vampires and is influenced by your sister. In spite of everything, they remain your only family and you owe them a lot; they adopted you even though they knew nothing about your previous life; they are good people who care about them and your welfare. For many years humans have been prey to vampires; so it is natural that a man of your father's age should feel some fear and hatred for them, you only hope that he will soon adapt to the new age, he cannot remain locked in his memories forever.
You gently squeeze his arm, as if to comfort Jimin in a way, "I hope for you that this 'plan' succeeds as best as possible."
He gives you a look, before giving you a little wink.
"You are not a human, but an angel."
You giggle, losing your gaze outside, among the speeding cars, the pedestrians waiting on the sidewalk for their bus, as the city lights brighten the entire environment. Your reflection in the window returns your glance, you're tense, you've never teased anyone and you're also a bad actress, you even told Jimin, but he insisted that you just have to stick to what he would say, that's all.
Jimin turns right and before you is the intriguing and luxurious appearance of the hotel hosting Seokjin and all his guests.
"The party will have already started, we'd better hurry."
The guy gets out of the car and runs to open the door for you without you asking him, you are pleasantly impressed and let him take you inside without a fuss, even though you are actually dying to imagine who knows what scenario. Will you be the only human? Or will you find some of your own kind? Will Jimin's parents freak out in front of everyone?
Shaking your head, you need to calm down.
"Don't be like that, I can smell your agitation," Jimin whispers as he leads you into the lobby, shows his invitation to a waiter who smiles politely at you, making his way to the area dedicated to the restaurant, it's crazy, everything is decked out in warm colors and silk ribbons, it looks more like a wedding than an engagement.
You peer through the crowd of people talking, everyone is seated at a table of four, further along is a longer table, and seated in the center next to a woman is Seokjin himself, his profile is ravishing, as is the skin that seems to be made of porcelain, he brings a goblet of wine to his lips as he nods at the words an elderly man is murmuring to him. The woman next to him is ethereally beautiful, you can tell right away that she is a vampire, both of them seem meant to be together.
"This way, baby" Jimin's serious expression alarms you, you look across and see them, father and mother Park.
They are both sitting at a practically empty table, their faces stiff and stern, but also remarkably beautiful. Park Sr. is practically a slightly older Jimin, while looking at his mother you realize where her son inherited those magnificent rosy lips from.
"Mother..." Jimin bows slightly, giving a faint kiss on the hand that his mother promptly extends to him, his father on the other hand nods in greeting, but neither parent shows that they have noticed your presence. You are about to vomit.
"Father, this is Han Y/N," Jimin says, gallantly shifting a chair to seat you in front of the woman who stares at you casting baleful glances.
"I know who the young lady is, Jimin ... you already introduced us to her several years ago," the father replies, at least he doesn't display the blatant disgust his wife is addressing to you instead; he's good at hiding it, "But I don't understand what she's doing here."
You tighten your lips, trying to moisten them somehow, and take advantage of a waiter's arrival to ask for water; you don't feel like drinking alcohol that night.
You glance sidelong at Jimin, but he smiles with absurd naturalness.
"I wanted to take the opportunity to give her a chance to have a word with Jin."
"How so?"
People start clapping and you see Seokjin get up from his seat laughing at something the woman said to him, you are sweating.
"Work stuff," the young man says vaguely, you venture to stare at Mrs. Park, she has not looked away from you, she is aware that there is more to it, a mother's instinct is rarely wrong.
"Just this?" the father then inquires, you huddle in your shoulders.
Jin began his speech.
"I thank you all for being here today, as you may know I have developed with the help of my trusted friends a dating site..."
The older man narrowed his eyes, "Well, Jimin?"
"It's getting harder and harder to find love nowadays, Vampire's Kiss was born for just that, to help lonely hearts find their missing piece..."
"You are right, there is more."
"And with happiness I am pleased to announce that unexpectedly I have also found my missing piece."
Jin takes the hand of the woman sitting by his side, and leaves a sweet kiss on her wrist, the hall erupts in loud applause filled with joy, "She is my fiancée," he thus drops the bombshell.
Amidst the congratulations of the guests, Mr. Park stares at you with huge eyes, while his wife cannot resist any longer.
"What?!" she exclaims horrified, "Are you out of your mind! You already have a perfect woman to marry! You can't do this to us, idiot son!" she growls breathlessly, her husband trying to calm her down with short pats on the hands.
"Darling, calm down...I'm sure we heard wrong, there was applause, Jimin definitely said something else" he sends a warning to his son with one expression, but Jimin is not intimidated.
"I'm afraid not, father... you two understood my words very well, she is my fiancée," he says with a confidence that you definitely do not have at that moment.
Father's face turns granite, he immediately shifts to you and you almost squeak, "Is that true? Speak up, damn!" he blurts out imperiously, your guts twisting, but before you can even respond, Jimin jerks up.
"I would appreciate a calmer attitude from you, you are scaring her and I don't like that," he hisses in their direction.
"We, on the other hand, would like to talk to you privately" Mrs. Park takes her husband with her, prompting Jimin to follow them, but before going the boy lightly hugs your shoulders as if to give you some sort of security.
"Go ahead, I'll be fine," you say with a smile, then see him disappear behind a door.
You're left alone watching couples and families talk about this and that, some have gotten up to greet Seokjin personally and you feel like a fish out of water, you can't even go and talk to him about the deal, it's not the right situation for such a topic, he seems so happy... and you're so nauseated by what just happened. You are grateful to Jimin for not letting you talk, because you surely would have been a stammering mess.
You sigh as you get up, maybe a breath of air is what you need to recover a little from all the fuss that has surely been raised, even as a fake girlfriend you suck.
You go to the balcony, it's nice and big and the hotel treats itself well, it overlooks a vast flower garden with a fountain that surely in the morning the birds use to freshen up, the moon high in the sky illuminates the whole area, casting mysterious shadows around, it all seems so...
"... beautiful."
You look around with wide eyes, was it you who said that?
No, it couldn't have been you, the voice sounded nothing like yours, it had a timbre ... masculine and hypnotic.
Looking suspiciously at every corner of the balcony, only to catch a glimpse of a tall figure in the shadows, you inhale deeply.
"Excuse me?" you ask, incredulous. How long has it been there? And why didn't you notice anything?
"I'm sorry..." a man comes out of the shadows, "You didn't get scared, did you? I didn't mean to scare you."
The first thing you think of as you look at him is that he could not have been human like you. His appearance is as bewitching as it is extraordinary.
His pupils have been engulfed by the darkness of the night, they are so deep that you feel a strange attraction draw you into those eyes, you cannot look away from his. But aside from the hypnotic coloring, the shape of his eyes gives him the sweetest look, despite the piercings that decorate the entire arch of his ears, his right eyebrow and even one side of his lower lip, fleshy and scarlet... inviting.
The well-defined jaw line and powerful physique make you think he is the kind of person who works out regularly to stay strong and healthy, he is really beautiful.
Such a man has to be a vampire, a forbidden dream.
You shake your head suddenly, remembering his words.
"N-No, you didn't scare me! Just surprised... I wasn't expecting someone here, they're all talking in there."
His face breaks into a shy smile, in your stomach butterflies begin to flap their delicate wings.
"I noticed it too, but I only know Seokjin and didn't see any other familiar faces, so I preferred to admire the moon.... it's beautiful, isn't it?" his gentle voice is a boon to your ears, after the sharp and inquisitive looks of the Park family, this boy is giving you some peace.
"Yes ... really beautiful" you smile, then extend a hand, "I'm Han Y/N, nice to meet you" you introduce yourself in a lively tone, but he stares at your hand for a few seconds, so long that you think you've done or said too much. You try to withdraw it uncomfortably, but to your surprise he reaches for it, and instead of a handshake as you expect, you see him politely bow his head, leaving an imperceptible kiss on the back of your hand, it's barely a brush, but a flush of heat reaches your cheeks and you feel a strange tingling sensation there where he lightly placed his lips, you've never experienced a hand-kiss, and few knew how to do it nowadays, but he was perfect, not at all vulgar or slimy.
Before fully raising his head, he lifts his eyes nailing yours, from that angle his gaze takes on a predatory hint, which disappears in a flash when he returns to a more natural position.
With surprise you have to breathe deeper to stop your arousal from rising, you don't know if vampires can feel such a change, you hope not.
"Oh...I didn't expect that," you giggle in embarrassment, he follows.
"My mother raised me that way, in her time it was a pleasant duty" he explains, and that is the certainty you were looking for, he is a vampire, "My name is Jungkook, Jeon Jungkook to be exact."
Jeon... Jeon... Jungkook?
Of course, you remember now. He's Kim Seokjin's manager, he handles most of his work commitments, maybe you could ask him for a little help.... No! You can't. You're at an engagement party, goodness! Jimin would take care of it, as he has already promised.
The guy in front of you looks around, "Did you come here with someone or do you know Jin?"
Okay, you came here as a fake girlfriend and technically you should support your best friend's plan, but looking at Jungkook something tells you that you shouldn't tell him such a lie, you don't know why-something in your brain says to seize the moment.
"I'm here with a friend of mine, he didn't have anyone to accompany him so I offered, did you?" you ask, his smile growing brighter and his perfect skin darkening the moon itself.
"I came alone, I had no one to ask," he shyly shrugs his shoulders and almost squeaks with tenderness, how can a guy so attractive and with such a size, also be infinitely cute?
The rhythm of a foreign song began to resound from the hall, you cast a quick glance at the stained glass windows and besides the reflection of the two of you you see numerous couples holding hands and moving to those notes, Seokjin is there too, he must have opened the dance. You envy them all. Even those who didn't know how to dance most likely threw themselves boldly onto the dance floor, you on the other hand are just good at blocking yourself like a piece of marble.... Jimin often teases you for this reason.
A little embarrassed you look at the tips of your shoes, not sure how to continue the conversation, you're such a dork.
"Do you want to dance?"
That question sends you into a tizzy.
You like Jungkook so much, but you don't know how to dance, and your instincts are screaming at you to tell him a sharp no right away, but the butterflies in your stomach want to push you to accept.
"Here... I would gladly accept, but I don't know how to dance and to tell the truth I always freeze, I'm not suitable," you chuckle sadly, but he tilts his head slightly, in his eyes you can see a spark of amusement.
"You only talk like that because you've had the wrong dance partners, give me a chance" he is firm in what he says, but you know you would only look like an idiot.
"I'd make you look bad, I don't want to ruin the reputation of a guy I just met" you try to joke, Jungkook takes two more steps toward you, you find him practically with his chest inches from your face, he's damn tall.
"In that case I will pretend to be a bad dancer, and then everyone will look at me, I will take responsibility for everything.'
'They'll look at you anyway, and wonder why a walking bag of blood is hanging from your divine arm' you think regretfully.
You sigh, only to find yourself nodding, there's no harm in trying, and then when would you have a similar encounter again?
Jungkook gives the impression of being one of those guys you only meet once in a lifetime.
You earn a smile from him with his teeth firmly in view, not only are they as white as the best porcelain in the country, but among them, two in particular have the typical sharp points that make vampires deadly predators, you feel the urge to reach out a hand and feel under your fingertips how sharp they can be, you stop only because he was quick to take you to the dance floor before you can change your mind, and with the light of the room you finally get a chance to study his clothes, he's wearing a cream-colored silk shirt, it comes down soft and loose but does nothing to hide the hard lines on his back and chest, his pants instead are tight against his skin and highlight the full power of his thighs.
Shit, you won't get out of it.
"It's a slow dance, you just have to put your hands here" gently he brings your arms around his neck, your hands graze his shoulders and your heart misses a beat, his sweetest eyes don't leave your face for a single moment, attentive to your reaction when his arms encircle your hips, "And then you have to follow the song, accompanying your body to mine" he whispers in your ear, you are trembling and hope he doesn't notice, a weight is falling on your legs, it's happening again. You are afraid to dance, people's judgment has always upset you, you will make him look bad.
You try to pull away from Jungkook, who in response just tightens his grip, now you're both an inch away from touching each other completely and his eyes seen from so close are absolutely a sight, oh god... his dark lashes are so long and his skin glows with a life of its own.
"Hey, hey... take it easy and look around, no one is paying attention to us, just move as your instinct tells you" you barely understand his words, his lips are in the foreground and you can see every scarlet ripple of their soft, shiny skin, you notice every little mole adorning his face, you swallow hard.
That's right, no one is looking at you to your relief, you nod and begin to move slowly, simply following his body. You frown, it's not so bad.
Well, it's still a slow one, you just have to rock a little and....
"I'm sorry to ask you like this and maybe I'm sounding intrusive-" he lowers himself to the crook of your shoulder, inches from your neck, his icy breath sparks little shivers on your skin and your nostrils are invested with his captivating, fresh scent, "Is there anyone in your life yet?"
Your eyelids begin to flicker, caught as you are by his scent you almost choke on your own saliva at his words.
He gives you a worried look, "Sorry, - he chuckles uncomfortably - I don't usually do that."
"No! I mean, I mean, relax! You didn't sound strange or intrusive," you quickly set the record straight, what sounds strange is your figure clasped in the arms of such an absolutely wonderful being as he is, "Anyway.... define 'someone' " you try not to look around the room, if you had seen Jimin's parents you would have died instantly.
You see him tighten his lips into an absolutely adorable expression, "I don't know… like a boyfriend, or a husband ... or someone you're dating," you think of Jimin, technically for that night you're his girlfriend, but you can't fake it in front of Jungkook, even if it's a stranger you'll never see again.
"No, actually no...what about you?" you choose honesty, plus you're curious too, does he have someone to go back to?
His smile returns to relax features once contracted with worry, afterwards he shakes his head.
"Neither have I, I've just had bad experiences, unfortunately," he pauses in the middle of the room, at first you don't understand what his intentions are, you see him move a few inches closer to you and everything about him screams a certain amount of seriousness, "But seeing you there, under the moonlight, I-"
"Baby!"
You widen your eyes, see Jungkook freeze and inside you scream in despair, why? Why did Jimin have to come right now?
Jungkook was saying something important, you feel it, and now he is simply walking away from you. A chasm opens in your chest. You want to kill Jimin, and then drown yourself in the valley of your own tears. You turn to cast a furious glance at the one who calls himself your friend.
"Jimin..." you hiss, he must have realized he's interrupted something because you notice him pale, more than he already is.
"Um... Jungkook?" he turns to the boy next to you, which makes you wince since he looks anything but pleased at the interruption. His contracted jaw gives him a dangerous air that you didn't think was possible in a sweet guy like him. But after all, you've known him for a little over half an hour; anything could have been possible.
"Do you two know each other?" he asks stiffly, before Jimin can answer him, you get in the way.
"Yes! He's the friend I accompanied to the party, rather ... do you two know each other too?" you feel nervous, not expecting such a turn of events.
Jimin nods, "We've been friends for years and we also work together."
Oh, great. Now you can go bury yourself. You're Jimin's fake girlfriend and you've ambiguously spent time with one of his friends.
"I didn't expect to find you here, you usually never attend events like this... you say couples make you lonely," Jimin teases him, but Jungkook just shrugs.
"My instinct was telling me to come, at least this time..." he casts you a brief glance, "But I think it's getting late for me, I'll leave you to your knight" with the last sentence he turns to you, and you don't miss his facial rigidity, you want to ask him to stay, but the words don't come out of your mouth. You have to stick to the plan; it would have been strange for the Parks to see their son's girlfriend dancing with another man all evening.
You watch him walk away into the crowd with regret, Jimin coughing slightly.
"I'm sorry... did you like him?" he asks cautiously, you sigh.
"No, it's okay... it's my fault, I got too carried away when tonight was all about you," you reply.
"Don't say that, you make me feel like a monster" he whimpers, a feeling of emptiness takes hold throughout your body, "I could arrange for you to go out together" he proposes, but you shake your head in denial.
You feel somehow that you have let Jungkook down, you don't know why, but you won't have the courage to talk to him again.
You turn to Jimin, "What happened with your parents? Did you tell them what your intentions are?"
The boy returns an apologetic expression to you, "In truth..."
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pascaloverx · 2 months ago
Text
UNREQUITED LOVE
Summary: Being a new student is already complicated. But when you end up developing an unwanted crush on a schoolmate, everything seems to get worse. This particular schoolmate is romantically involved with someone. And to make matters worse, the popular school quarterback starts to bother you.
Author's Note: This fanfic will be short and set in the universe of the movie Bottoms (2023), directed by Emma Seligman, using the characters from the film. The characters do not belong to me. The fanfic will not strictly follow all the situations from the movie. I hope you enjoy it. Initially, there will be no adult content. There will only be inappropriate language and scenes of violence.
FOUR
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FINAL
Your palms are sweating as you carry your chemistry project out to the middle of the football field. In the bleachers, classmates and even students from other grades are gathered. Hazel took it upon herself to invite some extra onlookers to witness your experiment. She even tricked Jeff into thinking there would be free cookies to get him to show up. A few teachers and the school administration are also here to see what you and Hazel have ambitiously named “the message of the year.” It’s a chance for the school to kill two birds with one stone—showcasing a standout project while setting an example for other students. As you settle the project into place, your nerves spike, realizing how much Hazel’s spectacle has turned a simple presentation into a grand event.
Hazel tries to reassure you, running her hands gently along your arms. "Looks like you're about to lose it, Y/L/N. Relax, it’s going to be fine," she says, with that signature confidence that somehow makes things seem less terrifying. But as you glance at her, frustration rises. If this blows up—literally or metaphorically—Jeff’s going to be out for blood. And after your last run-in, he won't hesitate to make things even harder for you. You can't shake the image of him rallying against you, fueled by that bruised ego and a dose of revenge. But as Hazel smiles, her hand lingering on your arm, you feel the slightest comfort in her touch. Maybe, just maybe, things might actually turn out okay.
"Promise me that if everything goes wrong, you'll come up with some epic story about why I got expelled," you say, half-joking, glancing nervously at Hazel. She lets out a soft laugh, but instead of a reply, she steps closer and pulls you into a kiss. It’s not a quick peck or something subtle—it's messy, intense, and full of all the things unsaid between you two.
From the bleachers, you hear Josie and Isabel cheering, shouting, “Show her, Hazel!” Their voices cut through the murmurs of shocked students and the exasperated calls from teachers telling you to break it up. But in that moment, it’s just the two of you, tangled up and oblivious, right in the middle of the field, not caring who’s watching or what comes next.
"Why did you do that?" you ask, trying to catch your breath and pull your focus back together. Hazel just grins, as though she’d been planning it all along.
"To give you a bit of courage," she says confidently, "plus, now I think you'll take me a bit more seriously as a potential future girlfriend." Her tone is so assured, so casual, as if she hadn’t just kissed you in front of a whole crowd—including PJ. You feel a rush of mixed emotions: excitement, nerves, maybe even a little panic. But Hazel’s steady gaze holds you in place, making you wonder if, somehow, everything is going to be just fine—no matter who saw.
"Alright, you’re unbelievable. Let’s get through this experiment, and maybe after that… we can go on a date. But you’ll have to convince me that—" you start to say, but Hazel gently holds your face and gives you a long, soft kiss. When she pulls back, she looks at you with a knowing smile, as if she’s certain there’s nothing left to convince.
“Let’s wrap this up,” she says with a grin. “There’s a spot nearby that makes the best burgers in the world.” You can’t help but smile back, feeling that strange blend of exhilaration and calm that only she seems to bring out in you. Whatever comes next, you’re ready for it, as long as Hazel’s by your side.
"So, me and Y/N are here to present our project. It’s a message for those who can understand. We suggest you stay in your seats and enjoy the show." Hazel says into a microphone, capturing everyone's attention. You pull the cover off the mannequin, revealing it dressed like a football player, looking just like Jeff. In the middle of the mannequin's chest, there's a sign that reads, "Snitches Get Stitches". Hazel came up with this idea after the bad moment at the kissing booth.
The mannequin has several tubes connected to it, which you and Hazel spent the night making for the presentation; theoretically, when you press the button in your hands, the mannequin will explode and spray fake blood all over the field. "Hey, people watching. If you’re being bothered by an idiot, harassed or something like that, we can teach you how to make them understand the message. And if you’re a jerk who goes around messing with people’s lives, our most sincere fuck you goes out to you." With whispers and shocked laughter rippling through the crowd, you and Hazel share a quick look before pressing the button together. The mannequin explodes with a satisfying pop, sending fake blood spraying across the field in a vivid, theatrical display. Gasps, nervous laughter, and a few bold cheers erupt from the bleachers, as everyone watches, transfixed.
The mannequin’s bold sign—"Snitches Get Stitches"—is unmistakable, and Jeff’s expression changes from cocky to uncomfortable. Even his friends look unsettled, exchanging glances. Hazel gives your hand a squeeze, her face glowing with a blend of pride and mischief.
“Consider this a public service announcement,” she calls out, loud enough for everyone to hear. "For anyone who thinks they can bully or mess with others without consequence."
You catch a few teachers’ reactions, torn between shock and stifled laughter. Despite the inevitable repercussions, you can feel the impact you've made. With Hazel’s hand in yours, the defiance burning in your chest feels liberating—worth every risk. As the crowd starts to break up, Hazel leans close, voice low but amused. “So… about that burger. Shall we?”
"You've got fake blood on your face," you tease, as Hazel approaches you, turning your face to the side and licking your cheek. "The blood is edible," Hazel replies after licking your face, noticing that her mouth is stained red.
"You two, young ladies, are in big trouble. You'll be serving detention for the entire month, and make sure to clean up this mess!" the principal says, approaching you closely but avoiding getting splattered in the pool of fake blood.
"However, girls, know that your project turned out great. You earned an A in the class," the chemistry teacher chimes in, smiling brightly. "Just don’t forget to wear more effective protective gear next time," she adds while applauding your work, almost dragging the principal away from the field.
"You had to use all that fake blood, didn't you?" you complain, remembering it was Hazel's idea to go all out with the gore.
"It's easy to complain, princess. Do you really think Jeff would feel any impact if only a few drops of blood came out?" Hazel retorts as you both leave the field, you contemplating how to clean up this mess while she fumes over your ingratitude.
"Don’t call me princess. Let’s clean this up and get home already," you exclaim, lacking patience as you see Hazel approach, her hands finding their way to your waist.
“If you stop making that face, we can go to my house afterward. My mom will be home late, and I have a really bad movie we can pretend to watch while we explore each other’s faces. If you behave, I might even buy us a pizza,” Hazel says, planting a kiss on your cheek as if trying to soften you up. It’s working.
“A nice way to try to buy my good mood. Don’t get used to it, but let’s hurry up; I want to eat with you as soon as possible,” you say with a smile, and Hazel looks at you playfully. “I know exactly what you want to eat, but let’s go, princess. The faster we finish, the faster we’ll get to my place,” Hazel replies, holding your hand affectionately as you both walk toward the supply closet, knowing it will be hard work but that it will be worth it in the end.
THE END.
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moodymisty · 2 years ago
Note
Crosshair loves physical contact and will hang onto you as much as possible
Tech loves whenever you cling to him while working. He loves when you lounge over him and just chill and lets him be, while still being close
- @clone-whore-99
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Author's Note: Yessssss!! I am sold thank you so much for feeding me in my time of need these are top tier <3
Relationships: Crosshair/Gn!Reader, Tech/Gn!Reader
Warnings: lots of fluff
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✦ Crosshair ✦
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Crosshair really does consider it one of his 'weaknesses', that he's constantly yearning for at least some level of physical contact with you.
Like him sitting down and you sitting in the spot between his legs, and his chin rests on your head or shoulder depending. He still has that usual grumpy expression, but is clearly soaking this whole thing up.
Or sitting sideways on his lap; But if you don't want to sit on this thighs, he'll still pull your legs to rest over his.
He's just constantly stealing chances to hold your hand, put an arm around your shoulders; Anytime he can, he will. He always takes the spot right next to you, wherever you are.
In public he's far more likely to just use an arm around your waist or a hand on your shoulder, more subtle but still some form of contact.
If he's helping you with something, he'll have a hand on your shoulder or back, standing well past close enough that he can get a good look. You'll usually get a ruffle of your hair or shoulder afterwards so he can watch your face scrunch up before he walks away.
Sleeping together normally involves a position that gives him the most surface area; Usually spooning or holding you against his chest. And if you don't start that way, you'll usually find yourself in one of those positions by morning. And he latches on tight; Especially if his sleep is being particularly unrestful that night.
He's just, so surprisingly touchy sometimes that it's almost a complete dichotomy to his usual attitude.
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Reading through another paragraph on your datapad, you quietly bite your lip and squeeze your eyes closed for a moment. They feel a little sore, but the momentary relief seems to settle them for a bit. At least long enough to keep reading a little longer.
This book has potential, but you aren't totally sold on it yet. Crosshair doesn't seem to be either, as each time he finishes a page he is either completely silent, or lets out a vaguely unamused 'hmm'. When you're both done you move to the next page, and start the whole process over again.
You feel a little bit too close to the edge of the seat for your comfort, so you scoot back a little bit more into Crosshair's body, and he straightens up more as a result. His arms raise a little bit before setting back down, loosely wrapped around your waist while the side of his face rests against your temple. It's not an uncommon position for you, especially when you're both reading something together. If anything, it's become sort of a habit.
But when you'd first met Crosshair, you never thought he'd be this, cuddly. He seems content as can be leaning into you, even if he hasn't spoken a word in a significant amount of time.
"Having fun?"
Hunter enters the Marauder's cockpit and looks at the scene in front of him with raised eyebrows, a drink in his hand.
Crosshair doesn't even need to say anything, only look, to let Hunter know that his comment is not appreciated in the slightest. Once he's finished doing so, he turns back to the datapad in your hand, and uses his own to tug you just a tiny bit closer.
✦ Tech ✦
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Over time you've become a master at snuggling him, while also staying unobtrusive to whatever he's working on. Like hugging his waist instead of his shoulders. Or looking over what he's doing from the side to not block the light.
At first you just laid your head on his shoulder, testing the waters, while he kept tinkering. Overtime Tech went from largely indifferent to it to actively hoping you'd do so, working in places that had more room for you to sneak in next to him.
Sometimes you'll help hold something for him if he needed the extra hands, but more often then not you'll end up falling asleep; At least if it's late. Which it usually is when Tech is up tinkering.
No matter the time however you'll usually listen to him chatter about his current work; As his voice a nice, pleasant tone to relax or fall asleep to. You'll hum and try to keep up, but Tech seems to just like that someone's listening, knowing that you might not understand it all.
Sometimes if he makes a loud noise that startles you awake he'll mumble an apology, feeling you move against him.
Every now and again you'll feel his hand brush against you, as if just taking a moment before going right back to work.
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Tech has a dilemma.
He needs the tool over on his workbench in order to continue working on the project in his lap, but right now your arms are wrapped around his hips, cheek pressed against his waist.
And... He doesn't want to move.
But he needs to finish this; Not for any particularly urgent reason, other than his brain will never allow it to remain unfinished now that he's started. So he sits with his quandary, subtly looking down at the way you're clung to him and debating how he can remove himself from this to get what he needs, and then return to it without anything having changed.
Though instead of having to do so Tech's hero arrives; Echo walking through the doorway moments before Tech was going to ask you if you could detach from him for a moment. He can't quite tell if you're asleep or not however, so he speaks in a soft enough tone that hopefully wouldn't wake you, if you indeed are the former.
"Echo," He murmurs, watching Echo look up from the datapad he was focused on to see Tech looking right at him.
"Could you perhaps hand me that tri-point screwdriver on my workbench?"
Echo quite quickly realizes the situation Tech is in, and why he's asking such for him to do something so minute. Echo takes a few steps off of his original path and snatches the screwdriver off the table, walking it over to hand off. Tech nods, silently thanking him for his assistance.
Now he can get back to work, feeling the way you adjust your legs so they entwine with his just a little bit more.
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spicysix · 2 years ago
Text
crush crush crush | steddie X reader
eddie likes steve. he's not subtle about it. he's also brave about it, unlike you, and development: steve likes eddie back. you like both of them. well, ain't that just your fucking luck?
warnings: canon divergence, brief mention of homophobia/lgbtqphobia, polyamorous relationship, gn!reader (use of they/them pronouns), buckley!reader, fluff. and my already known absurd use of italics word count: 7.6k author's note: this one has been a long time coming! i started writing it so, so long ago, and it's finally ready! i really hope you enjoy it, and if you do, don't forget to reblog! comments are always appreciated as well ♡
↳ ao3
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Eddie was not very subtle.
Well, you actually weren’t sure he was even trying to be subtle, but, if he was trying, it was definitely not working.
Not with all the stolen glances, and the closeness and proximity every chance he could get. Not with all the pet names, and the cat calls, and with the ‘getting nervous and panting and kind of sweaty’ every time he saw more skin than just arms - like a little stomach when a shirt lifted, or a neck when a head was thrown back in frustration.
And you got it. You could definitely understand the appeal. Steve was very handsome.
When he took off his shirt to dive into Lovers Lake to find a portal, while Eddie lit up a cigarette you looked away because you saw the way Robin glanced suspiciously at Nancy - honestly, Robin was the only one not appealed by Steve's lack of shirt - and you did not want that kind of glance being thrown at you too. And after Steve was bitted by those fucking demobats, you saw it in Eddie’s eyes how he wished it was him bandaging Steve up instead of Nancy - and you also kinda wished it was yourself. He got way too serious about throwing his vest at Steve ‘for his modesty’ too.
And when Eddie called Steve ‘big boy’, Harrington was not the only one who got flustered, because suddenly your head was filled with many images that were not appropriate for the running-from-the-cops-and-also-from-a-interdimensional-monster situation you were all in. Eddie seemed so proud for making Steve lose his words. You just stood in the back of the RV and tried to ground yourself instead of giving into the little green feeling growing inside your chest when Nancy sat at the seat beside Steve while he drove. You heard them talking about kids, for fucks sake.
And when Steve looked so worried about Nance, did everything he could to wake her from her trance, even started singing a song he thought she liked, and was later so focused on listening to her plan. When he gave you a tight hug right before he left with the girls to the Creel house, you almost melted into a puddle. Then he looked so worried about Eddie, asked him to not play the hero when the actual plan was about to start, you could understand if Eddie's heart skipped a beat because yours definitively did - and you were sure the metalhead wanted to say something else when he called out for Steve, but he settled for ‘make him pay’ instead.
And you actually thought it was a one-sided thing, but when Eddie woke up weeks later in a hospital bed, in a different state, after literally almost dying in your and Dustin’s arms; you, Dustin, and Steve were there to see him wake up, the huge smile plastered on Steve's face was enough to light up the whole room and Eddie's own smile reciprocated. And you looked at Dustin feeling like you were interrupting something. And they shared a hug, and Steve was cautious not to hurt Eddie's tummy filled with bandages and stitches. And you and Dustin said you were going to grab a coffee, and when you came back they looked a little pinker in the cheeks than they were before and their hairs were all out of place - Steve’s hair was never out of place.
So, yeah, you could understand Eddie's crush on Steve. With his brown soft hair, all prepped up with too much Farrah Fawcett hairspray (Dustin couldn’t keep a secret for his life), always smelling so good. And his caramel soft eyes, worried about everything and everyone around him but himself. And his preppy, stupid polo shirts and jeans combo, always ironed - you were pretty sure he ironed them himself. The freckles that went all the way from his neck down his torso and his back, splattered in such pretty patterns you kinda wanted to connect them like dots in a kid’s play. With your tongue, to be more precise.
But! YOU, specifically, did NOT have a crush on Steve. You just understood why Eddie did.
When all dust had settled and you were able to go back to Hawkins - thank god for Hopper coming back from the dead and giving Eddie all the alibis he needed, and thank god for their FBI friends for covering everything up as they did with the mall situation the year prior - Steve was very eager to have Eddie staying at his place while the metalhead (and his uncle, of course) searched for a new home. Because his trailer was destroyed, of course. And he was still recovering from all the injuries, of course!
Steve was very smart when he needed to be.
Not everyone in Hawkins was entirely convinced of the whole made-up story, and some people were still very rude to Eddie and the Hellfire boys on the streets, but Hopper was definitely more respected than Powell. So no matter what some people thought, the truth installed was that Eddie was innocent after all. Everyone just had to accept that.
After a while, as life went back to normal - as normal as it can be when you’ve saved the world more than once and half the town was under restoration because of an ‘earthquake’ - you started noticing how the boys were always together. Like when you’d pass by Family Video to see Robin (to see Robin, okay!) and Eddie was also there, leaning on the counter with a soft smile as Steve registered someone else’s borrowed tapes.
Or when you’d go downtown and see them together sharing a banana boat on the new Scoops Ahoy franchise that opened up again on Main Street. Or when you’d volunteer with Robin and Vickie to help those whose houses were destroyed and both boys were also already there, following each other around on their assigned tasks. Or when you went to parties or threw your own parties and they always came in together, never left each other’s side, and went back home together too, always just the two of them.
One day you went to Eddie’s work at the music store and Steve came in behind him as he stepped out of the ‘employees only’ door.
I mean, there’s only so much someone who’s not an employee can be doing with an employee inside a ‘employees only’ room. We all know that.
“Hey, guys,” you greeted, faking obliviousness as you went straight to the New Wave session that was slowly growing as more bands went famous across the country - famous enough to reach Middle Of Butt-Fuck Nowhere, Indiana.
“Oh, hey babe!” Eddie smiled as he came to your side. “What can I help you with today?”
You pretended not to shiver with the nickname. “Well, aren’t you employee of the month,” you mocked, looking at Steve (still behind Eddie) from the peripheral, whose cheeks just went pink. “Do you have New Order’s latest?”
“Oh, I think I saw it back there!” both yours and Eddie’s heads turned to Steve as he enthusiastically revealed, and if you thought he was pink before, he had just created a new shade of pink just then.
“I’ll go get it for ya,” Eddie gave you a smile trapped between real and fake and left for the infamous ‘employees only’ back room.
You smiled at Steve, your own smile trapped between soothing and teasing, and turned your attention back to the vinyls in front of you. A few moments passed in silence before he decided to talk again.
“You’re going to Robin’s this weekend?” you looked him straight in the eyes after his question. He could not be serious.
His prolonged silence made it clear that he was serious.
“You do realize it’s my house too?” you asked.
“Oh Jesus fuck, yeah, no, of course!” he waved around and you couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah, I know, you’re siblings and all, I keep forgetting that, ‘cause you’re nothing alike, of course it’s your house, it’s just, I was wondering maybe you had, like, another commitment, maybe a date, I dunno, can’t hurt to ask right!” he was babbling.
God, he was so cute.
No, scratch that. Forget it, you’ve never said that. Forget it right now!
“No plans at all this Saturday except to hang out with you nerds. Don’t worry,” you winked at him and he let out a sigh as he smiled.
Eddie came back from the inventory room, New Order’s ‘Brotherhood’ in his hands and that typical huge smile on his lips. “There you go, babe.”
You rolled your eyes playfully and paid for the vinyl before leaving, waving at them through the huge glass windows of the storefront. They waved back just before you saw them running to the ‘employees only’ room again.
Guess they were in their honeymoon phase.
You were completely fine and not envious at all.
-x-x-x-
Saturday arrived, and as you were serving soda to the kids playing board games on the coffee table in the living room, Steve and Eddie walked in knowing there was no need to knock. You walked past them as you went back to the kitchen to fetch some chips.
“There you are!” Eddie sounded excited, a six-pack in one of his hands while he pulled you in for a tight hug with the other one.
You smiled. “Where else would I be, doofus? Hey, dingus.” You waved at Steve through the cloud of Eddie’s frizz.
The boys followed you into the kitchen to put their stuff in the fridge. Nancy and Jonathan were intertwined leaning on the island and only let go of each other to say hello to the newcomers as you poured potato chips onto a big bowl and went back to the living room. Everyone else came back with their drinks in hand, including Robin and Vickie who were in the garden for some reason, and chatter began.
This was something you tried to do at least once a month, reunite with everyone including the kids - especially since Hopper and Joyce joined forces and decided to stay in Hawkins, god knows why but you were grateful for it.
That month the reunion was set on your and Robin’s house, your parents finding it weird that their adult offspring were friends with so many high schoolers when you explained that what you were having was not a party, but a friendly get-together. They let you host it anyway, even with the weirdness of it all, when you promised to clean the whole house - not just the living area where you’d all be at - afterward. And they went for a date that night, to give you the full house - very nice of them, and good for them, you guessed?
Everyone had been busier, with the younglings busy with high school and the young adults attempting at adulting, but you all felt the need to check in on each other every once in a while, and just hang out together in peace instead of trying to fight bullies, or Russians, or interdimensional assholes. Shared trauma was a great bonding experience!
A few hours later you, Mike, and Erica were fighting to decide which movie you were all going to watch when Steve and Eddie came back from the kitchen with a chocolate pie they had brought and several plates and forks. Eddie cleared his throat loudly and the room went quiet, looking at them.
“I, uh, we wanted to share something…” Eddie said as Steve put everything on the coffee table. You adjusted yourself in the bean bag you were lying on. “Me and Harrington, we, uh. It’s just, like. I don’t know, I don’t think you’ll be mad or anything. I mean, it’s not like it’ll be a first-time thing, I know you’re all cool with it, considering Robin and Vickie, it’s just. Uh.”
“We’re dating,” Steve went right to the point.
There was a loud silence for at least one whole minute before Dustin spoke up.
“Okay, and the actual news is?”
Eddie and Steve blinked at the same time.
“What,” was more of a deadpan than a question out of Harrington’s lips.
“You really thought we were all this dumb?” Lucas asked gesturing around to point at everyone in the room. Everyone was nodding along.
“Neither of you is subtle. Like, at all,” Max wasn’t even looking at them anymore, sharing a She-Hulk comic with El.
You couldn’t hold your laugh any longer and saw the unexpected couple looking at you immediately. “You knew too?” Eddie sounded really offended for some reason.
You laughed louder, almost falling out from the bean bag. “Are you not listening? Everyone knew! I went by your work this week and you came out of the back room together! Your clothes were all crumpled,” you pointed at Eddie and heard everyone giggling along.
“And we saw you coming out of a dressing room in that fancy store Steve likes. Also together,” Mike pointed at him and Will, who nodded enthusiastically, a shy smile growing on his lips.
“Eddie’s not even trying not to flirt with you in front of our other clients anymore,” Robin stated.
“You were licking on the same popsicle when we went to the lake the other day. At the same time,” Nancy pointed out.
“Nothing serving as a barrier between your tongues besides a very thin strawberry popsicle,” Jonathan concluded with a smirk.
Both boys looked actually astonished as if they were so sure they were hiding something. They looked at each other again before sighing and sitting down in the only tiny space left on the couch, Steve almost in Eddie’s lap. You turned your eyes away.
“So is this our celebratory pie? For our fist man-on-man couple of the group?” you asked, already diving in to get your piece. “Here’s to many more to come!” Mike choked on thin air, you pretended not to notice.
The conversation was easily shifted back to the movie discussion, the couple ‘news’ soon forgotten as you all settled back into your domestic routine, pies in hands, beers and sodas being shared (age appropriately!), and screaming about terror versus action. Again.
-x-x-x-
Robin had called your work in the middle of your (and hers) shift to invite you to come with her, Steve, and Eddie to the movies after all of your duties were over. You’ve said yes and thanked the gods you always took a change of clothes with you to work so you wouldn’t have to show up to the theater in your ugly uniform.
Not that there would be anyone there you wanted to impress. Of course not.
As you arrived, the boys were already there, but your sister was nowhere to be seen. “She’s in the bathroom or something?” you asked. They shared a glance.
“I thought you’d talked to her?” Steve questioned. You raised an eyebrow. “She wasn’t feeling so good, so she went home. Said she’s sorry.”
“Something about diarrhea,” Eddie grimaced and you sighed.
“Great, love being the third wheel,” you murmured under your breath. “You wanna go do this by yourselves? We can reschedule. Invite Jon and Nancy next time too.”
“No, we wanna go with you!” Steve stated quickly and Eddie coughed loudly. “We promise not to go overboard, okay? We’ll put you in the middle seat.”
“Also, not everyone in Hawkins is nice. Mostly no one, to be honest. So we’re not adept to PDA anyways,” Eddie concluded, shrugging. “Basically no one knows we’re dating except for you, our friends,” his voice was in a very low tone, almost whispered, to not draw attention.
You empathized, also keeping your voice low. “Yeah, that sucks. Robin and Vickie are always complaining about it, and they’re also not openly affectionate to each other in public places. And honestly, I’m really scared for them sometimes. I know Robs can stand up for herself and Vickie, but they’re also so tiny. Little babies,” you brought your thumb and index finger together, showing how really smol your younger sister and her girlfriend were. “And people are mean.”
“What’re some bigots in comparison to a real-life D&D monster, babe? Don’t worry,” Eddie put his arms around your shoulder, Steve on your other side, guiding you to the ticket booth.
Eddie paid for the tickets - something about a fly, yeah, the bug - and both you and Steve fought for the right to buy the popcorn, but while you were bickering Eddie went and bought those himself too. As you finally went to the screening room and took your seats, Steve was serious about you being in the middle. Eddie went to the bathroom while the trailers didn’t start.
“So that’s what he’s like as a boyfriend? Doesn’t let you buy stuff?” you curiously asked Steve while shoving a handful of popcorn into your mouth. You kept your voice low again so no one would easily hear you talking.
He smiled dreamily. “Yeah, especially since he’s been getting ‘clean money’, as he calls it, with his ‘grown up’ job.” He made quote marks with his fingers. “He’s a really thoughtful guy. I mean, that was already obvious before, but as a partner… it’s different, you know?” you nodded and asked him to continue. He was getting flustered, talking about the boy he liked made him look so cute… You just had to. It was all you would ever get from him, anyway. “He’s very affectionate, as you could guess. He has to always be touching me in some way. I thought I would get annoyed at some point, but it still hasn’t happened and, honestly, I don’t think it will. I like touching him at all times, too.
“He also likes to do everything together, even silly minor tasks like getting groceries or something. Gets me little gifts almost every day, and not always stuff he buys, but things he sees that remind him of me. Flowers that he steals from other people’s gardens, he once bought me a heart-shaped pebble. It’s so stupid,” he giggled.
Giggled!
“And I love it. He’s so kind. People treat him like shit most of the time, and he’s still always as polite as he can. Only fights back the really aggressive ones. Kids are scared of him because of their parents’ closed minds, but he approaches them and tells them not to fear, and plays stupid magic tricks to get them to like him. Helps old ladies cross the streets and shit. He’s probably the best person I know,” he was rambling. Your heart was so full. “And I had no idea, you know. That I could feel like this for another guy. Eddie calls himself my bi awakening,” you both shared a laugh.
“You deserve it, Steve. After Nancy…” you gulped lightly, and so did he. “I didn’t think you would ever get over her. And she wasn’t able to give you the love you deserved, not her fault obviously, but still true. It wasn’t meant to be between you two. But you and Eds really fit together. Pieces of a puzzle, Dingus and Doofus. You give each other the love you don’t give yourselves with those annoying low self-esteem of yours,” you nudged him with your shoulder and he looked down to laugh, but you saw his eyes watering.
After a while, he looked up. “Yeah, I guess that’s true. I’m really, really happy.”
His smile was really brighter, and his eyes sparkled more. He looked lighter as if part of the huge hero weight he carried on his shoulders had been lifted. You could imagine that the fact that your lives not being in constant danger helped, but love… Love gets you through anything. And you were really, really happy too - for them.
When Eddie came back from the bathroom, bowing for a girl to walk in front of him to her seat, the trailers were already starting. And the bright light from the screen enveloped him in a kind of aura, and his hair looked so fluffy, and his Motorhead shirt sleeves were rolled up to his shoulders, his arms covered in tattoos for show. His shredded jeans, and his chain belt, and his funny wonky walk, and the way he fiddled with his rings. He threw himself at the sit beside you, his arm instantly coming to the rest of your chair behind you while the other reached for the popcorn bowl on your lap, his huge trademarked smile plastered on his face and his beautiful calf eyes looking into yours. You gulped. Something inside your belly swirled.
“Ready for the film, babe?”
Your heart almost leaped out of your chest as you nodded and smiled back at him.
Shit.
You had a crush on Steve.
And you had a crush on his boyfriend.
You were so very screwed.
They gave you a ride home, even though your house was way off their own route, and made you sit between them in Eddie’s van too. Steve’s arm was around you and Eddie’s hand occasionally touched your arm or knee and they let you choose the songs - even though none of you shared musical taste by any means - while you commented on the movie. They even got off the van to give you hugs when you arrived home.
And although you had one of the best afternoons ever, you were also mentally exhausted.
Apparently, finding out you had crushes on two people who were dating each other and then spending your whole day trying not to make heart eyes at their every move was very draining.
Robin was in the living room, a random rom-com on the TV that she and Vickie were pretending to watch, while they were actually attached to each other’s mouths. They let go when they heard the door closing behind you though. Your parents were still not home from their jobs.
“Hey, how was the movie?” your sister asked excitedly. You raised an eyebrow.
“The movie was fun,” not that you had paid a lot of attention. “The being a third wheel part, not so much,” you got closer to them and messed up Robin’s hair. “I actually realized I have a massive crush on both of them and kinda wanna throw myself off a cliff right about now.”
You and your sister had absolutely no secrets between you (that’s how you ended up with her, Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington, a random middle-school nerd and a very sassy ten-year-old trying to break into a secret Russian base under the town mall Summer of ‘85). So it was a no-brainer that you were gonna tell her about your crushes. And you knew she was gonna tell Vickie anyway, so you just said it with her there and then.
Vickie’s eyes widened with your confession, but Robin didn’t seem to bother. “Yeah, honestly, I had that figured out. I know you too well, ya’ know. Can’t hide shit from me anymore. I’m glad you uncovered your truth, though.”
“Fair,” you shrugged. “You look good for someone with diarrhea, by the way,” at that, she did look guilty about, while Vickie laughed loudly, but you wasted no more time before heading to the bathroom.
You needed a long, calming bubble bath to realign your chakras and rest your stupid, stupid little head.
Later that night, contradicting your expectations Vickie went back to her house, and Robin knocked on your door with a PB&J sandwich for you that she left on your nightstand. You were already under the covers, your head buzzing with so many thoughts and feelings that you were no closer to understanding. And apparently, your sister knew that. She laid down beside you, both of you on your sides facing each other.
“How you feeling?” she asked, basically whispering.
You whispered back: “Like shit. I dunno what to do.”
“Do you wanna do something about it?” her hand found yours under the covers.
“I don’t think there is something to be done about it, Robs. They’re dating.”
You both went quiet for a few minutes. You were trying not to cry, but your sister’s caresses on your palm and the warmth of the blankets around you were making it very hard.
“I really thought Steve liked you, you know?”
“What?”
Robin smiled sweetly at you. “Yeah, he would constantly bring you up on random conversations at work. Wanted to include you in every plan we made,” she paused just for a minute. “But, in hindsight… he did that with Eddie too.”
“Well, Eddie reciprocated him faster. And made his move, so there’s nothing I can do about it now. And I’m happy for them, I really am. They look - they are! So happy together. This,” you gesticulated around yourself, “just some goddamn sour grapes. It’ll pass.”
“Yeah, it will,” she got closer to you and hugged you, and you finally let your tears drop.
“Might take some time. Might take some distance,” you sniffled. “But it’ll pass.”
-x-x-x-
You were serious about the distance.
So you tried to steer clear of Family Video, except on days you knew Steve didn’t have shifts on. You thanked every god and the universe that none of the bands you liked released anything so you wouldn’t have to go to Eddie’s work to buy new vinyls or tapes. You’d see them on the streets and take a detour, a longer route home, walked into stores so they wouldn’t see you back.
Robin noticed, of course, she knew you like the palm of her own hand, but she didn’t comment on it. She would invite you to movie sessions with her and Vickie and would hold herself so they wouldn’t be too touchy and accidentally make you feel bad. Not that you would actually care. It wasn’t them you were in love with, your bitterness was not that big.
You even tried to go on dates of your own, tried to force the crushes out of your system. People who’d ask for your number at work, one of your coworkers, even someone that started a conversation about mayonnaise on the market aisle once. But none of them were nice enough, or funny enough, or sweet enough, or snarky enough, or caring enough, or Steve enough, or Eddie enough.
You felt like the biggest idiot in the County.
You couldn’t hide from them forever, though. You couldn’t hide from them at your monthly get-together. Especially when it was being held at the Munsons’ new apartment - mostly financed by government hush money.
And you were avoiding Steve, Robin - his other soulmate - wasn’t. Therefore, it wasn’t a huge surprise when he pulled up on your driveway to give you and your sister a ride to his boyfriend’s house that night. You tried your best not to act like an asshole, but as you sat in the backseat you knew you were quieter than normal. You could feel Steve’s eyes on you through the rearview mirror at every stop at a red light. He didn’t ask, though. He just kept listening to your sister’s rambles.
But, after he rang the intercom and Eddie opened the gateway and Robin ran up the stairs, you tried to follow her but Steve stopped you with a weak tug on your arm. You turned to him.
“Are you alright?” he asked, his hazel eyes filled with worry. You softened.
“I’m good Stevie, can’t wait to see Eddie’s apartment, shall we?” you tried to get past the conversation, but he didn’t let go of your arm.
“You know you can talk to me if something’s wrong, don’t you?”
“Of course I do. Seriously, don’t worry. Let’s go, Eddie must be wondering where we are already,” you pulled your arm with strength enough to be released from his grip and went up the stairs without waiting for an answer. You heard him sigh, though.
When you reached Eddie’s floor, he was standing in the doorway. “There you are! For a second I thought you’d bail on me, babe,” he said, and if you had ever heard him call Steve babe you could swear he was talking to his boyfriend. But he only ever called you babe.
He pulled you in for a hug, and you squeezed your eyes shut at the smell of his cologne, the way his hair tickled your nose, the way his cold rings felt against your warm skin, and how he was tracing circles with his thumb on your shoulder.
This was way too hard.
You gently pushed him away, ending the hug faster than you really wanted it to end, and looked at his face. “Give me the tour, will you?”
He grinned widely at you, but you didn’t miss the questioning look he threw Steve behind you before he turned and started showing you the apartment. Dustin, Max, and the Sinclairs were already there - Steve picked them up before he did it with Robin and you.
It wasn’t a huge apartment, but it was enough for Eddie and Wayne. They had a fairly big living/dining room, separate from the kitchen, and two bedrooms now. Eddie’s room was already filled with posters on its walls and ceiling, the usual mess the boy used to make already scattered on the floor. Sweetheart had her special spot on the wall too, looking as beautiful as ever.
As you went back to the living room, complimenting and congratulating Eddie on the house, Nancy arrived with Mike and the Byers siblings. As a heartwarming gift, you had all agreed to participate in a campaign that day, even Steve, Max, and Nancy went for it - after lots of bribery, but still. You had always been curious about it, so it didn’t take much to convince you too.
So you all gathered around the dining room, pulled out your character sheets - the kids helped you create your own characters along the month - and settled for what you knew were hours of adventure. And some (a lot of) bickering.
The one-shot campaign was a success. Eddie was a great DM - not that you knew a lot about that, but it felt like he was a great DM. He said he had some insights from Will, who looked very proud of the help he provided. Everyone seemed to have a good time, even Nancy, Steve, and Max who reluctantly smiled their way through the campaign. Dustin had a blast that his favorite humans were together and enjoying the same things at the same time. Your characters saved the day in the end and it felt rewarding.
Mr. Sinclair had passed by and taken both his kids, plus Dustin and Max, home. Vicky was on her way there to get Robin and you. Nancy and Jonathan, in the living room talking to El, were waiting for their brothers, who were in Eddie’s room talking to both him and Steve.
As you were coming back from the bathroom, you couldn’t help but listen to the conversation.
“…so yeah, Will, it’s absolutely okay to like boys,” Eddie’s voice wasn’t loud, but you were just by the door so it was clear enough for you to hear.
“And how did you know you liked both?” Mike asked.
Steve cleared his throat and before you could pry even longer into their conversation, you passed by to the living room, sitting beside your sister on the couch, arms crossed.
“Okay?” Robin asked, and you nodded. El looked at you in that curious stare she had, and Nancy pretended not to notice. Jonathan was staring at the wall. Probably high out of his mind, and missing Argyle.
You poked on your cuticles until the LGBT lecture for the baby gays was over, and the four boys walked out of Eddie’s room. You smiled as sweetly as you could at Will and Mike - Will smiled back, but Mike seemed kinda shocked and so his smile was more of a grimace. Poor boy needed time to settle into his self-discovery, apparently.
“Shall we?” Nance asked and El and Jon got up from where they were sitting on the floor. They all said their goodbyes to Steve and Eddie before getting out.
A few minutes passed by in awkward silence, you and Robin sitting on the couch, the boys standing up in the middle of the living room, no sign of Vickie. You could see your sister and Steve having a weird telekinetic conversation, you knew he was the other third of her soul, and was already fearing for your life because your sister was known to make stupid-ass decisions.
“I’m gonna take a wee!” aaand there she goes.
She got up way too fast and you couldn’t hold her arm to force her to stay, and so you saw yourself alone with. The boys you liked. It was like your body was preparing itself to ignite into explosive inside-out combustion, a mantra rolling in your head repeatedly ‘calm the fuck down, breathe in-breath out, calm the fuck down!’, not helping very much but you still tried.
Eyes closed, you felt the couch sinking as they both sat beside you. You took a glance and Steve was directly to your right, Eddie beside him, both of them sharing another silent conversation before Steve turned back to you.
“So-” your attempt at cutting the ice was cut out.
“I like you,” Steve blurted. Your eyes almost popped out of their sockets.
“Steve, what the fuck, Eddie’s sitting right there,” you discreetly pointed at the other boy, your voice somehow caught between a yell and a whisper. Eddie wiggled his fingers at you.
“Yeah, he’s part of the conversation?” Steve answered, sort of asked, and you couldn’t be more confused.
“What.”
“We both like you,” Eddie joined, scooting closer to Steve, making Steve scoot closer to you, making you scoot a little backward.
What the fuck was going on.
“You. Both? Like me?” they just eagerly nodded. “Well, that’s fucking weird. Like, not normal. At all.”
“Is it, though?” Steve asked, no malice in his voice, eyes full of affection. “You like the both of us. Is that weird?”
“WHAT-how-what-no?! What! ROBIN?” your eyes went straight to the little corridor leading to the bathroom where your apparently betrayer of a sister was, and you could swear you heard some thumping coming from that direction.
Steve stretched out his arms, ready to touch you before he gave up. You couldn’t decide if you felt grateful or sorrowful. “No, your sister didn’t betray you. She didn’t have to tell me, I can tell when people like me.”
“You couldn’t tell with me,” Eddie pitched in, and you suddenly remembered he was there. Quieter, probably for the first time in his life. Why was he so quiet?
Steve rolled his eyes at his boyfriend’s remark. “Yeah, okay, I said people, not big ass confusing nerds.”
“Are you telling me they’re not big ass nerd?” Eddie pointed at you, but you were still in too much shock to even process what he was saying.
Steve looked at you again, his eyes going back to that affection you saw before, and he called your name sweetly, and you had absolutely no idea what that conversation was and what you were supposed to tell them because, yeah, you liked them, but what? They liked you? And what the hell were you all supposed to do with that?
You didn’t have to answer, though, because Robin got out of the bathroom and Wayne walked in through the front door, and Steve and Eddie scooted backward again, and you got up faster than your sister did with her ‘wee’ whatever.
“Robin let’s fucking go goodnight mister Munson nice to see ya bye boys what the fuck!” you didn’t stop to hear any of their answers, nor for Robin to catch up to you, nor to take a fucking breath, and just bolted down the stairs.
You had a lot of thinking to do that night, wrangled up in your sheets, a PB&J sandwich by your nightstand, Robin probably cuddled up to you.
What the fuck.
-x-x-x-
Two whole weeks passed by.
You continued on your ‘avoid them at any costs’ plan, even though Robin was all up in your ass bugging you to talk to them, even though you told her you didn’t know what to say, even though she practically gave you a scripted speech, even though she tried to convince you it couldn’t go wrong, even though she was most probably right, even though she kept saying Steve and Eddie were in sour moods, even though you felt like shit for making them sour. Because you still had no idea what to say.
But you were also in a sour mood, because you missed them, and because you didn’t understand but you wanted to understand, and because your crush was probably more than a crush, and you really wanted to see where all of this could go even though you have never heard or seen anything like this. Deep down in the confusing fortresses of your heart, you were willing to be a pioneer on that matter. Even if you very likely wouldn’t pioneer shit.
And so when your feet automatically walked six blocks from your work to Family Video on a random Tuesday after your shift, and your heart unclenched a little bit when you saw both Steve’s bimmer and Eddie’s van - and no sign of Robin’s bike -, and when you walked in and saw it with our very own two eyes that even though they were clearly happy to be around each other - Eddie bugging Steve in his closing shift - it felt like something was missing there, and you desperately clung to the idea that what was missing was you.
“How’d you talked about this?” you asked, their heads turning to the sound of your voice, Steve instantly letting go of the broom he was swiping the floor with, Eddie instantly standing up from where he was all slouched over the counter.
“This… what?” Steve asked, his eyes avoiding yours for a second to look outside from the glass doors. You turned around and switched the plate from ‘open’ to ‘closed’. Fuck Keith if he complained Steve closed half an hour earlier.
“This. You liking me. How did you get to that subject, and then decided to bring it up with me?” you pointedly looked at Eddie. He was way too quiet last time. You needed to hear him saying.
He apparently understood you just fine, “I brought it up. Even before we agreed we were each other’s boyfriends, I asked Steve something similar, how did he know he liked me, and he told me how confused he was because he liked both me and you,” he said.
You gulped and tried not to deflate.
“And Eddie said, quote-unquote, ‘fuck yeah they’re the best, I really think I like them too’. And we didn’t do much about it, because we didn’t think there was anything to be done, and soon we were serious about each other. Until Eddie took us to a gay bar he used to go to in Indy,” you think you remembered Robin talking about this to Vickie someday, their plans on going too.
“And we talked to some of the people I knew from other times, and we ended up talking about you a few drinks down, and. Apparently, there are people who date more than one person. And it’s okay,” Eddie shrugged as if it was nothing, a shy smile on his lips, and you hadn’t noticed but you were all a few steps closer to each other. Steve’s broom forgotten on the floor, both of the boys’ eyes on you, adoringly, sweet as fucking candy, a whole conversation they had about you with strangers at a gay bar in Indianapolis.
“I need to sit down.”
Steve brought you a cup of water, and Eddie was sitting beside you on the ‘employees only’ room couch in the back of Family Video. Fucking ‘employees only’ back room. Eddie wasn’t sitting too close, but he wasn’t far, and that was comforting.
You gulped down the water in practically one go and settled the cup on the side table. Scooted a little closer to Eddie, patted down on your other side, Steve followed your command and sat down too. You couldn’t look at them, though, not yet.
“You did your research”, your voice was quieter than you wished.
There goes being a pioneer, you guess.
“We weren’t even looking for it, the information just literally landed on our laps,” Steve said.
“We were just rambling on and on about the person we both like. A lot,” Eddie smirked, but there was no real danger in his smile, never was. Your shoulders decompressed a little, and it was like they were both waiting for that to scoot a bit closer. Eddie’s hands just beside your thigh, Steve’s arm draping behind you on the couch.
A few minutes passed by, your mind a whole mess of a race, but they waited patiently for your next question. “How would that even work?”
“Like any other relationship. Except it’s three of us instead of two. And we can have dates, no one will know it’s a date besides us, it’s what Eddie and I already do, people think we’re just two guys being bros. We will look like three friends hanging out, but we will know.”
“And we can sit next to each other and hold hands, hidden under the diner table, we can have a whole schedule,” Eddie joked, you chuckled, and he held your hand. You let him. Squeezed his fingers with your own. “And sometimes we can go to Indy and we don’t have to hide there.”
“Or we can have home dates, and Eddie can cook, and I can bake, and you can just sit there and look pretty as you do,” Steve’s fingers grazed on the nape of your neck. You got goosebumps.
“Are you saying I can’t cook?”
“Well, last time your lasagna was not that good-” you let go of Eddie’s hand to swat at his thigh, and he laughed out loud. “Just kidding, babe, it’s just cause we wanna treat ya,” you quickly held his hand back.
“You know how Eddie likes to treat the ones he cares about,” Steve said, and you remembered your conversation at the movie, that day.
“Did you plan that movie? When Robbie had ‘diarrhea’?” Steve’s cheeks turned instantly pink, and you and Eddie both snickered at that.
“Stevie might have begged your sister to leave,” there was so much fondness in Eddie’s voice, and you noticed just then, how much fondness was in the voice he used to talk to you, too. “You make him nervous, you see.”
Steve’s ramblings made more sense.
“You make him nervous too, he’s just the weird kind of nervous,” Steve remarked, and now Eddie’s quietness the other day made more sense too.
God, you had been oblivious.
“And we can make this work? You really think we can make this work?” you asked, still unsure. Okay, you weren’t a pioneer, but you still had never heard of this before.
“We can totally make this work, babe. I swear to you is not as complicated as it seems. Is just-” he interrupted himself, thought for a second, his eyes staring intensely into yours, vulnerable, a little pleading, decided to go with it: “Well, it can be just love.”
Eddie’s words echoed in your head for what felt like a long time. Not a fucking crush, oh no. You knew them too well for that. You knew yourself too well for that. All of the fear washed in a wave out of you, and you sighed a happy sigh.
Just love.
Felt right.
“Feels right,” you said, feeling Steve’s forehead thumping on your shoulder, his fingers getting lost in your hair, he was closer than before.
Eddie was closer than before, you looked at him, his nose touching yours, his breath tickling your skin, suddenly his lips on yours, and your whole body collapsed into him, your fingers still tightly holding onto his, your free hand searching behind you for Steve’s hand, Eddie’s free hand in your face, cradling your jaw, so gentle, his lips so soft even though you knew he had a habit of picking on the skin there, but he was so soft, so soft, so soft.
Steve’s lips were on your neck, and suddenly you switched it up, let go of Eddie’s lips, turned your head, now Eddie’s lips on your neck, your lips on Steve’s, he was soft, you knew he liked Chopstick, he was real soft, but his fingers on your neck, tugging on your hair, his hands on yours, he was a bit frantic, not as slow, not as gentle, just as sweet, sweet as fucking candy, and you were going into a sugar-coma, head spinning, breath caught, couldn’t wait to do this over, and over, and over, and hiding in a diner, and in a gay club in Indy, and in your house, and their house, in their beds, or your couch, and over and over and over again, dizzy with all the expectations because you felt it, right through those kisses: you could make this work.
You would make this work.
It was working already.
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frownyalfred · 7 months ago
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Hello yes it’s me again 🤠 I’ve decided to continue this little series of “things that have caused me to wake up in the middle of the night and clench my chest and go “GAh” because it is summer, I have too much free time to cry over very good fanfics, and writers deserve to feel noticed (coming from a writer who’s favorite comments are the ridiculously detailed/long/rant ones) So without further ado…
d. the coral room fic tags being like “Omegaverse 🥰 Enemies to Lovers 🥹 Nesting 💖” but then in parenthesis “but Bruce’s ver of nesting is stealing super weapons to assasinate Clark” the first time I saw this tag I spat out my coffee and probably laughed for about three minutes and to this day I randomly wake up and laugh about I don’t know why it resonated so much but it was genius
e. On a less happy note I physically cannot bring myself to ever again open your fic “Silent Running” because the first time I read it I don’t think I slept that night. Definitely a wake up-go “GAH situation there, the absolutely bone chilling way that fic settled with me?? Idek why?? Like it’s definitely not dead dove whatsoever yk, but the way you write this subtle nuanced “something’s-wrong” feel… The way you wrote it? I can’t explain? But I’m not sleeping well if I ever read it again?
f. GAH THE WAY YOU TALK ABOUT ALF/MAR/THOMAS I FEEL LIKE A SOLDIER ABOUT TO GO TO THE TRENCHES I FEEL THIRTY YEARS OLDER I FEEL LIKE IM FIGHTING FOR MY LIFE??? BECAUSE YOU DO SUCH GOOD CHARACTERIZATION OF THEIR DYNAMICS BUT THERES THIS UNDERLYING IMMORTAL SADNESS TO EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM BECAUSE LIKE. THE BASIS TRUTH OF DC IS THAT MARTHA AND THOMAS DIE. It’s so ingrained into canon that they are the DEFINITION of doomed by the narrative- and not just Martha and Thomas as characters, but the Alf/Mar/Thomas relationship as well!! SND YOU MAKW ME ABSOLUTELY FALL IN LOVE WITH THEM?? HOW DARE YOU?? Why would you do this to us? Why must you write such good character dynamics?
g. Speaking of characterization, let’s talk about your characterization of Jason Todd. Let’s talk about the absolutely SCRUMPTIOUS way you write him. Because like there is no babygirlification in sight, but there isn’t any of that misogynistic Jason Todd homicidal meathead stuff either- you’ve somehow written him better then half the dc writers out there. Like I FEEL like I’m reading about Jason Todd himself in what I consider to be his purest form (like Under the Red Hood). You don’t push off his grief and trauma, you don’t misinterpret his feelings and emotions, you don’t make excuses for his mistakes and actions, you instead embrace the barebones of his character in its entirety in this??? Breathtaking way??? Like I don’t wake up and go “GAh” when I dream about this, I instead silently levitate from my bed like I’m ascending to the next plane of existence.
h. NGGFFFHHGHHKDHX the way you wrote Clark in “eye in the sky” HELLO MA’AM WHAT WAS THAT WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT-
Because it’s a Injustice AU right! You know what’s happening! You know that it’s so bad, that there is no longer Clark but Kal, that the regime is horrible, and that’s how you start us off, with the glimpses into the inner workings of the Regime and you know it’s just as bad as ever and you think you know what to expect- and then you meet Clark Kent. GAH. GaH. AUTHOR. WHY WIULD YOU DO THAT? IT HURTS!! It hurts to have Duke walk in and see Clark Kent, see him with his plaid shirts and glasses and you are completely taken by surprise because you were expecting Kal! What’s Clark doing here!! He’s supposed to be dead!! And then it hits you how GENIUS it is to write it like that (after you stop crying from pure shock. I’m a bit of a crybaby). Like AUTHOR YOU HORRIBLY BEAUTIFUL WRITER YOU. YOU KNEW EXACTLY WHAT YOU WERE DOING.
I. And what’s worse- how it must be for BRUCE!!!! GAH! GAHHHH! WHAT DO I EVEN SAY TO THIS? The psychological torment, the emotional damage, the potentials for angst, I’m actually getting all breathy just thinking about oml I start rolling around my bed like a crazed burrito and if anyone saw me they’d probably think I was possessed and/or having seizures. Im realizing maybe this got a bit too long.
I have to do this in increments otherwise I kinda just look crazy… 🌚 I’m just a girl 🎀 (I’m so sorry)
Moral of the story is once again I love your works and you are a good writer 💁‍♀️💐
Oh my goodness, thank you so so much for this lovely ask!!
d. thank you, I love that tag. and it’s accurate for the fic — that’s just Bruce’s way of getting settled!
e. I feel that! It was a dark fic for sure. I’ve been writing too much dark Clark recently, I need to change that.
f. their relationship makes me feel genuinely ill sometimes, not because they’re bad but because of the weight of the future hanging over them. I want to write another fic for them in my room full of coral verse for sure.
g. thank you so much! He’s a hard character to write sometimes but I try to avoid pushing him too far to any extreme. He’s complicated even if it might not seem like it!
h. thank you for mentioning this! It was definitely a deliberate choice to have Duke meet Clark and not Kal. The casual menace of it was just too attractive to me.
i. yeah, Bruce is really going through it in that fic. You know when you’re going through something rough and you just shut down as much as you can? That’s how I view him in this.
Thank you so much again!! This was the best thing to wake up to.
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