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llitchilitchi · 2 years ago

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// a snippet of my oblivion au that I wrote a couple days ago because chat asked for it last night. chronologically this part takes place during the ‘path of dawn‘ quest, several days after this

warnings: they kill a man, dream has a panic attack

Luther Broad’s Boarding House is a lot bigger on the inside than it appears from the streets of the Elven Gardens District. The early afternoon sun casts the room in soft light, by now mostly empty as people move on with their days and return to their duties. Only couple people remain: a gossiping couple of girls with half empty glasses of wine, a middle aged man in the corner who looks up from his book as the door closes behind Dream, and a young man at the bar engaging in conversation with the bartender in a familiar white bandana.

Dream smiles, strolls past the empty tables and takes a seat by Sapnap’s side. The young Blade spares him a single glare, near identical to the one he gave him as he entered his cell. It seems like a lifetime ago. He turns back to his pint and Dream leans on the bar as the owner drops the conversation and asks Dream for his order.

“Just some ale, thank you,” Dream tells him, deflecting any further attempts at an offer of a meal or a bed.

Sapnap chokes on his beer at the sound of Dream’s voice and turns to the dunmer with eyes wide in disbelief.

“Dream?” he whispers as the barkeep passes Dream his drink.

“Long time no see.”

“Long time indeed!” Sapnap shakes his head, looks Dream up and down. His eyes linger on Dream’s curls. “Shit, you look like a whole different person. Or like a dandelion puff. Fuck.”

Dream laughs, short yet sincere, the sound more of a breathless wheeze than a full laugh. “Well, thanks. It’s good to see you too, I guess.”

Sapnap nods, once, twice, and his expression turns solemn. “Listen,” his voice drops into a whisper once more, “I’m being watched. Just do what I say.”

Dream hums in reply. He follows Sapnap’s gaze to the corner of the inn, towards the man with the book.

“I’m going to get up once I finish my drink,” Sapnap explains. He takes a sip from his mug, long and deliberate. “I’ll walk out of here. The guy in the corner will follow me. You go after him.”

Dream glances at the man in the corner. His eyes are fixed on Sapnap’s back.

“Ready when you are.”

Sapnap tips the mug back, slams it back on the barwith a satisfied grunt. “Good. I want to see what he’ll do.”

He stands up then, offering the barkeep a couple pleasantries before the man laughs and nods his head towards the door in the back of the room. Sapnap mutters his thanks and stumbles towards the door with little grace. As soon as the door shuts behind him, the man in the corner stands and follows.

The door never has the chance to close a second time. Dream follows after him quick and slides his foot into the gap before it can shut close, and he makes sure the door makes no sound as he slips in.

The stairway is cast in shadows, the little light coming from below flickering and Dream presses himself to the wall where the light won’t reach.

The man descends the stairs, following the sound of Sapnap’s footsteps, and as he reaches the mid section, his hand goes to his hip, hovering over the hilt of a knife, and Dream curses under his breath.

He doesn’t think, taking two steps at a time as the man draws the blade. He shoves the man, making him stumble and the man shouts in surprise. By the time Dream regains his balance Sapnap has drawn his sword and drove it through the man’s middle. He looks up just to see Sapnap pull the sword out and slice through his throat with ease.

“Fuck,” Dream breathes. The air is heavy with copper as the body hits the old stone floor.

“Search his body,” Sapnap orders, his voice even.

“What?”

“Search his body,” he repeats and flicks his wrist, shaking the blood off his sword. “I’ll keep an eye out in case any of his friends are nearby.”

Dream gapes but doesn’t object, only nodding as he kneels by the man’s corpse. His nose twitches as he’s hit with the smell of blood and piss pooling around him.

The body has little to offer, a couple of septims that Dream pockets before patting the man down once more. He had a book on him, Dream thinks, and he knows it was not left behind on the man’s seat when he left.

He finds it tucked into his coat pocket, a small book bound in deep red leather. A strange book for certain, with ornate cover and a lengthy title in faded gold lettering, though what makes Dream stop is the title of the book, translated below the golden letters into the daedric alphabet. Commentaries on the Mysterium Xarxes, volume 1.

He stands and steps away, further from the pooling blood and holds the book up.

“I think I got something.”

Sapnap steps over the body and sheaths his sword, pulling Dream into a one armed hug with his free hand.

“Good work,” he tells him, heading back for the stairs. “I am glad to see you by the way, you just caught me at a bad time.”

“I figured,” Dream mutters. He turns back, towards the dead man. “We just killed a civilian.”

“He wasn’t a civilian,” Sapnap corrects him. “He was part of the Mythic Dawn- it’s the cult that killed the emperor.” He pulls Dream away from the body, towards the exit while Dream blinks slowly, and the information processes.

“The what?”

“Apparently they worship Mehrunes Dagon,” Sapnap continues. “Nasty shit. I’ve been tracking their agents in the Imperial City. I guess they noticed.”

“And we’re just- what? Leaving a body here? Sapnap we just killed a person! In a public space!”

“Right, right. Official Blades business. I’ll handle this, don’t worry your fluffy head over it.”

He leads him back to the bar, guides him to sit on a stool as he turns to the owner. Dream tunes the rest of the conversation out and he notices only when Sapnap slides another pint towards him.

“Drink up,” he tells him, and Dream doesn’t have the energy left to object. He takes a long sip, until his throat hurts from swallowing, but the cold liquid clears his mind, if only a little.

“There. You already look better,” Sapnap tells him and he pats his back. “What about you?”

“I found Uriel’s heir,” Dream replies. His voice is too small but at least he found it, somewhere. “I- his name’s George.”

“Oh thank Talos he lives!” Sapnap clicks their mugs together. “To George Septim, then! We shall restore him to the throne!”

“It won’t be that easy,” Dream says as Sapnap drinks his ale. He waits until the Blade sets his drink down. “We lost the Amulet.”

“You-”

“I went to Weynon Priory as you told me,” Dream rushes to explain. His ears twitch. “I found Bad, gave him the damned thing- He told me to go search for George. You’ve- you’ve heard of Kvatch, right? You must have, shit, of course you’ve heard of Kvatch! The city was destroyed, overrun by daedra-” With each sentence he picks up pace, right ear twitching as he thinks back to the charred stone and the smell of sulphur. “He was- I found him in the chapel, but first- the city gate was blocked, and there was- the portal to Oblivion itself, and the daedra kept coming, and there was so much lava and the stairs and it just kept going and I-”

He flinches back when Sapnap rests his hands on his shoulders and he blinks back tears. His vision clears, and Sapnap is looking at him with worry.

“Hey,” he whispers. “Deep breaths, okay? You’re not there anymore. Drink some more, it’s gonna clear your head. We’re back in the Imperial City. No more daedra.”

“I’m sorry.” Dream’s voice cracks.

“It’s okay,” Sapnap says, and then again when Dream does not believe him. “You saved the city,” he reminds. “You saved all those people. You saved George.”

Dream does not grace that with an answer.

They drink in silence, until the ale untangles Dream’s tongue once more.

“I brought George to Bad, and he said it would be best they hide in Cloud Ruler Temple.” His voice shakes as he speaks. “When- when we got back to Weynon Priory, there were these… the same people who were there, back then, when…” When the Emperor died, he wants to say. Sapnap nods when the words die in his throat instead. “We got there late. There were just… a couple left. They stayed behind to finish off who was left in the Priory. By the time we found Bad they fled with the Amulet.”

Sapnap nudges his knee against Dream’s. “You did what you could,” he reassures. “If Bad couldn’t do anything, neither could you. Or anyone, for that matter. You still managed to find George. Hope’s not lost yet.”

How strange, Dream thinks as a smile tugs at his lips. Bad said the same thing.

#oblivion au #dreamwastaken #sapnap #no idea how to tag this so enjoy this tiny snippet of dreamnap bonding over murdering a person?#if something doesnt make sense feel free to send an ask theres a lot of casual talk of lore

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anxiousgaypanicking · 11 months ago

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how um. Bad is the noncon in hunger hurts..

uhh i dont really know how to rank it on a scale

its not like begging/pleading for it to stop. its more like coerced consent? kind of? i tagged it noncon because theres no yes, but also dubcon because theres not really a no? if that makes sense?

if youre worried its too much - which is completely and totally okay - then i would recommend not reading it. if youd like to try, feel free! if you need to drop it off at any point, thats okay too.

there's never going to be a moment in that fic where its like crying for it to stop, its just for the first bit its going to be coerced/begrudging/hypnotized consent, or no clear yes/no given, if that makes sense.

as of right now, chapter 2 is the only chapter with sexual content in it, so if you havent read chapter 1 i think itd give you a vague idea how the overall tone will be.

if youd like a better example of the vibe im going for, id recommend mercy no more by hypenotized on ao3. theyre who i wrote this fic for, and thats why its so uncharacteristically heavy compared to something id typically write (i value consent in all of my work, this was an exception as it was a gift for an author i really enjoy). mercy no more in particular though is where im drawing a lot of my more morally grey/immoral elements from though

hope this helps! and if it doesnt/you want specifics feel free to dm me or send another ask. the last thing i want is for anyone to be uncomfortable <3

#ask #important #im v open to communication!#and if youd like to enjoy a fic but feel like you cant #i dont mind spoiling chunks for you specifically so you dont have to read something #potentially triggering and whatnot #i completely understand!

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neowinestainedress · 2 years ago

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omg hiii its 2 am at my place when i finished 'hits different' and now typing this (and idk what time i gonna finish typing and hit the blue button to send). my eyes still wet cuz omg yes again i cried. you write so well and i swear i could write a wholw paragraph about how much i love your style and writing and how you poured emotions into your writing. i just hope whatever you do in your life outside this app, you'll never stop writing, even if it's a hobby to kill your free time but i'm sure you love writing with all the word counts every time you released a story. (definitely not saying the short works doesnt have your love poured in but you know what i mean, i just really love long oneshot and i appreciate it so much that you wrote them to the end and uploaded it here)

the development of your characters... damn. you wrote them so well. AND OH GOSH HAECHAN CHARACTER HERE IS JUST A PERFECT DAYDREAMING GUY WE ALL WANT IN OUR LIVES. "When life give you Haechan, don't let him slip away." GOD I WISH LIFE GIVE ME A LEE HAECHAN (i mean yes technically we are living the same lifetime with one and only lee haechan), to the point i dont think i will be able to fall in love with other men irl cuz haechan has set the bar too high for anyone to reach it. okay that's probably too personal. But, once again thank you for writing a very perfect lee haechan in your writing once again. At least the hopeless romantic in me can be happy.

And the angst??? I LIVE TO READ AND LOVE ANGST, I AM LIVING FOR IT. At some point i feel like the pinch to my heart get so real i think im really the fl in the story. well i definitely can feel the real trauma and i understand how she acted like that. poor haechan but yeah it happened when it get to overwhelmed. Thanks for his characteristics tho, he stays and lord i want a man like him (no i dont want other men) and being the most understanding, patience, he like an angel he deserves so damn much love and honestly i wish the fl give him that even after the story end with happy ending cuz yes both of them deserves the happiness and love together.

“And I will die like a man,” he insists, challenging you with a glare.

“Yeah, exactly, don’t think,” he snarls.

“I don’t want to hear you. I don’t need to hear you to know you’re going dumb on my cock.”

Yes, i died here. And come back to life and SCREAM. He is a menace, a loser, BUT I WANT HIM. Honestly there are lot more (i mean its 40k+) but yeah i need to stay sane for my own self. Adding cherries on top, he is the real guy because whatever situation he knows he shouldn't force and always care for the fl.

And i love how you include all the positivity in the fic, tho of course it should be a norm, SAY YES TO NOT TAKING ADVANTAGE WHEN THE WOMEN OR EVEN MEN NOT BEING THEMSELVES!!

Well honestly, i kinda wonder if Mark actually know it's fl that Haechan always brought home and fuck (when he is there). So, I always thought like maybe Mark heard it and then shove anything in his ears to block the moans and all so he never noticed fl's voice or maybe he get out of the house whenever it happened (and he is not out of the house yet), or he just pretend he didn't know anything but that doesn't make sense cuz when haechan was with wonyoung, he didn't seems to like saying something that involved feelings with the fl.

I have so much things to say but i will cut it short here with thank you for writing a perfect long piece of yet another haechan fic, i really love it!

and here am i moving on to other things...

This is probably too long already and this is not related to 'hits different' but your other fic, the traitor series. idk if you still remember but i used to send ask where i talked about 2nd part and you did replied but i didnt replied back (sorry about that) because i was waiting until the 3rd part come out and decided to just get back to the 'discussion' after that but i never did altho i have read the 3rd part due to my busy schedule so i ended up losing the notif since tumblr only let certain amount of time. and i finally get back to you now. Another reason is it's the same as this, i have so much things to say and couldnt find a right way to put it into long para cuz yes of course im so satisfied with your writing and at the end the fl get together with haechan just like how i wish altho he kinda dont deserve it. Yes of course i still feel like he doesnt deserve her after all he did to her but he changes and i shouldnt hold onto it too much when they could find happiness among themselves again. You did included it in your note about writing another part for jeno but since its already too long. Well im not gonna ask you to write about because i have seen your wip and you planned to write a lot and your req is close too (+ it's too late now anyway) so i will just say this here, well honestly you always end your story with characters developments so theres nothing to ask for more. I would love to see how haechan and the fl in their new 2nd chance relationship, like how haechan treat her when they hanging out with their friends and if jeno finally found the loml cuz he deserves his own happy ending (altho ofc happy ending doesnt mean he need to find a partner to be with). But that should be it. I'm just writing this here cuz i feel bad for not getting back to you for that series but also its not only bc i feel bad cuz that sounds like im forcing myself it just i really think i should tell you you did well writing the series and appreciate it that you even took time before posting the last part so you of course put so much in thought how youre going to end it and i feel the need to put closure to our discussion just because it's worth it. It deserve the closure note too and once again im so sorry for coming this late to give feedback of the series.

Hoping for your happiness and have nice days ahead!! couldn't wait for your other masterpieces but still take time!! Lots of love!!!! 💗💗💗💗

hii!! i wanted to say that i thought it’s impossible to cry for this fic as if i didn’t tear up while i wrote the last texts haechan sent the mc lmao (i’m a liar) so i’m sorry, my next goals are 1) a happy fic and 2) a short fic. this made me tear up, i’m so happy you can see how much i love writing and i hope the same. if i’m lucky enough to get the job i hope to get i should have a bit of free time to keep my writing hobby alive so, let’s hope for the best! And yes, i totally get what you mean, writing a 20-40k or more story takes much more time than a fic around 1-5k words and if you don’t love doing it you don’t put those words down.

this is haechan’s vendetta for all the times i wrote him like an asshole LET’S GO HAECHAN AND SUNFLOWERS!!! it’s not a want it’s a NEED at this point (also it got nothing to do with the story but lately he’s feeding my delusion a bit too much so yeah). i might’ve written the man of my dreams in this fic… just maybe. no but it’s true that we don’t know him truly but it’s already a blessing to living at the same time. i think i came up with a good compromise between real him and obviously made up character, idk how to explain but the mix between the hopeless romantic – or loser (affectionative) – and the tease is just so haechan.

i was unsure about her backstory for so long, because initially she wasn’t supposed to have one (not this heavy at least) but then it came to me out of nowhere and i felt it was more fitting of a reasoning for the way she behaved (especially her obsession with rules) than some tough break-ups. i’m not even sure it was what the person that requested wanted but as much as I love fwb2l i’m sick of always reading them with the fl being the first one to fall in love or the one to be more emotionally into the story. i struggled to come up with a plot for months but i was sure since the start that i wanted haechan’s character to be like this. the first one to reach out (when they met again at the club, when he asked for her number, asking her to stay over and so on) i needed loser haechan in my life so badly. and yeah, i can reassure you they’re living happily together because it’s what they deserve.

but of course haechan can be the real devil when it comes to making love (oh i wish theres a part where they be making love like you know after confessing and becoming couple so the tension is not in the air and they can just enjoy yeaㅡ i need to writing too much) “And I will die like a man,” he insists, challenging you with a glare.|“Yeah, exactly, don’t think,” he snarls. | “I don’t want to hear you. I don’t need to hear you to know you’re going dumb on my cock.” Yes, i died here. And come back to life and SCREAM. He is a menace, a loser, BUT I WANT HIM. Honestly there are lot more (i mean its 40k+) but yeah i need to stay sane for my own self. Adding cherries on top, he is the real guy because whatever situation he knows he shouldn't force and always care for the fl.

i wasn’t sure about ending it where it ended, but to be honest i didn’t even think about writing a short smut scene. i wanted to add another scene like two months later but then i thought the fic was too long already so i was like ‘nah, let’s leave it to reader’s imagination’. now you’re making me think about them making love and i’m crying. it would’ve been even better if it was from haechan’s pov, like… he really thought he had lost her and then… she was still there??? and she confessed she never loved nobody else like him??? BRB GOTTA HAVE A MENTAL BREAKDOWN.

the funny thing is the I KNOW that Haechan’s the type to say things like this even irl it’s just his vibe *crying* whoever dates him is so lucky.

i literally wrote about a man that will never exist in real life, how do i bring him to life??

And I love how you include all the positivity in the fic, tho of course it should be a norm, SAY YES TO NOT TAKING ADVANTAGE WHEN THE WOMEN OR EVEN MEN NOT BEING THEMSELVES!!

it should be the norm but unfortunately it’s not so rip

can i be honest? i love mark but in this story he really is mr clueles😭 1) he’s awkward so even if he heard (he did hear at times) he would shove his earphones on and try to fall asleep like that. 2) after a few months of their affair, he started dating minjeong so he didn’t want to listen and try to analyse the moans of his roommate’s hookup at all 3) the mc was just too good at slipping away they never met not even by mistake and also most of the times they just met up when mark wasn’t there. he knew something was going on but he never pried on it much, also because haechan was good at keeping it a secret. hyuck flirts with many people so to mark is not really weird he brings someone at home every now and then. and haechan’s story with wonyoung was super short and at one point it’s clear hyuck doesn’t talk much about his relationships so mark almost only makes assumptions about them (in fact, to him they’re dating but they’re really not, when haechan goes back to the mc and has to talk with wonyoung it’s just to say that they can’t get to know each other romantically because there’s someone else in his life). it’s a mix of mark barely being with his head on earth (they way he always tries to set mc up with anybody every time they go out when she’s sulking because she wants Haechan sends me) and mc and haechan being good at keeping it a secret (always in a corner, touches under the table, going to a place they know none of their friends will ever go)

I have so much things to say but i will cut it short here with thank you for writing a perfect long piece of yet another haechan fic, i really love it!

Thank you, it made so happy to discuss it with you, probably I’ve answered too much but I hope it’s not a problem!!

i have a few asks about that story so i’m not sure which one is yours (i guess the long one? did you want haechan and the mc to get back together but at the same time you wanted to slap him for what he did?) but apart from that, don’t worry. i don’t mind even if you discuss a fic six months after i posted it or even a year, life gets busy and tumblr sucks so it’s fine.

Another reason is it's the same as this, i have so much things to say and couldnt find a right way to put it into long para cuz yes of course im so satisfied with your writing and at the end the fl get together with haechan just like how i wish altho he kinda dont deserve it. Yes of course i still feel like he doesnt deserve her after all he did to her but he changes and i shouldnt hold onto it too much when they could find happiness among themselves again.

i’m happy you liked the ending of happier. haechan in that series surely wasn’t the man of our dreams but he’s working hard to be a better person. i know it’s all fictional and those characters don’t exist but i wouldn’t have made it end that way if i didn’t know he could be a better man and keep on growing up, so you can sleep at night knowing they’re all happy.

You did included it in your note about writing another part for jeno but since its already too long. Well im not gonna ask you to write about because i have seen your wip and you planned to write a lot and your req is close too (+ it's too late now anyway) so i will just say this here, well honestly you always end your story with characters developments so theres nothing to ask for more. I would love to see how haechan and the fl in their new 2nd chance relationship, like how haechan treat her when they hanging out with their friends and if jeno finally found the loml cuz he deserves his own happy ending (altho ofc happy ending doesnt mean he need to find a partner to be with).

honestly? i wanted to write that part right away even if nobody wanted it. but then last year i had a really bad burn out and i still have no idea how i managed to write the stories i had planned back then (and in fact i didn’t write two of one series) so i decided to don’t start anything because then i get mad at me. like i use writing as escapism and when i start a story and can’t give it an ending it reflects on me more than it should, so i’ve promised myself to don’t put too much on the plate. BUT who knows, if i can keep it short i could still write a small epilogue where we see more of haechan and mc’s relationship and also jeno. in my mind they’re all back together as friends, and jeno did find another person that loves him like he deserves, so whether i’ll write another small part or not, this is their future in the sour universe. i would’ve loved to expend the sour universe and make an entire spin-off on jeno for sure, and maybe even on renjun but that’s just too much work.

i’m also happy you understood the characters development because some comments drove me insane and made me doubt everything. i simply thing this ending was a clear cut, you either liked jeno or haechan and it’s obviously if she didn’t end up with who you were rooting for, you would’ve ended up disappointed. but to me this story was so much more than #teamjeno or #teamhaechan so i’m happy with my characters anyway (even tho sour!haechan you will never be like hits different!haechan)

But that should be it. I'm just writing this here cuz i feel bad for not getting back to you for that series but also its not only bc i feel bad cuz that sounds like im forcing myself it just i really think i should tell you you did well writing the series and appreciate it that you even took time before posting the last part so you of course put so much in thought how youre going to end it and i feel the need to put closure to our discussion just because it's worth it. It deserve the closure note too and once again im so sorry for coming this late to give feedback of the series.

no don’t feel bad at all, i’m the chilliest person and i just love discussing about my stories but i don’t get mad when it takes more time to reply, i’m a late replier too so i can’t get mad at others.

thank you so much for this ask, it made me really happy and i’m still glad you wanted to also discuss happier. have a nice day too!!! Love you 💗💗💗

#answered #hwaneymintea #fic: hits different #fic: happier #series: sour universe

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lesbeet · 3 years ago

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sorry to ask a big question like this unprompted and of course please don't feel a need to answer this, but i'm having difficulties right now as a college student who managed to never really practice composing formal writing in high school and my first 2 years of college now having to take writing intensive courses. i feel like theres a lot of shifting between different modes in a bit of an intuitive way needed to write effectively, and i'm sure with practice i could get a better sense for that, but in general ive never been good at organizing my thoughts and have a lot of trouble with executive function issues/adhd stuff that make it so that when people try to break things down like ‘just write an outline before you write to structure your thoughts!’ as a simple first step it feels like theres so many unnamed steps i’m supposed to figure out before i can even get to that point. i get the feeling there might just not be easy answers applicable across different people beyond the normal steps people recommend for essay writing and i just have to continue trying to figure it out even if it feels pretty fruitless right now, but i just wanted to ask since i know you’ve talked about both being an english teacher and having adhd (while ofc that doesnt mean youve had that issue, i at least feel it might be easier than how ive tried to articulate my issues with people knowledgeable about writing in my life who dont have adhd or anything) i was wondering if you maybe had any advice about how i could approach this or break things down further or anything? thank you so much even if you just read this and don't respond, my apologies for sending all this!

i'm actually going to approach answering this from more of an english teacher perspective than from an adhd-er perspective, bc i find that a lot of my students without adhd also struggle with organizing their thoughts and putting them into words to a degree that necessitates further direction beyond just "go write an outline"

i can't really give you any specifics without knowing the style of writing or the goal of the piece, but 9 times out of 10 you'll be pretty well served by either:

1. compiling evidence until a pattern emerges, which will help you figure out your overall angle, thesis, claim—whatever you call it, it's the central idea that your writing piece is pointing to. then you can figure out the best way to present your evidence in support of your central idea

or,

2. if you already know what point you want to make, then it's just a matter of figuring out the best way to do it. is there specific evidence that you can use to support it? is there a particular train of logic that you could delineate to help your reader reach the conclusion you're trying to present? sometimes trial and error is best here, or even setting a timer for 5 minutes and typing stream-of-consciousness-style nonstop about the topic to see if any repeated ideas emerge. again, looking for patterns helps here, and adhd-ers are often particularly adept at pattern recognition! once you've found the patterns that will help you make your point, it's honestly not the worst idea to just rearrange them in your head until it feels like it makes sense. most poorly organized writing i read is only poorly organized because the writer put down the ideas in the order they came up with them and didn't try to rearrange them into something more effective. if you try putting things in different spots, you'll start to get a feel for what makes sense, which ideas logically lead into one another, etc.

for writing fiction, honestly the same options can work for brainstorming or outlining, but instead of a thesis, it's a theme, and instead of evidence and a path of logic, it's characters and a plot.

ik this is super vague but i hope it was helpful! if you want more specific advice, feel free to reach out over chat! thank you for being patient i meant to answer this yesterday kdsjflksjd <3

#answered #anonymous

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localspirit · 3 years ago

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pls feel free to answer this whenever if ur not in the mood or if its too much rn!! i was wondering if u have any advice on how to reach out to a deity? like, how/where should i research what to offer them & how to reach out to them? tysm!! ur one of my fave mutuals btw i hope ur havin a wonderful day <3

okay im editing this bcs its long and i forgot something already LOL

HI. it depends which deity youd like to reach out too. there are some good sites you can find where theres info on like greek deities. its a bit harder for kemetic deities. (frown.) i suggest a candle, i use tealights because theyre small, cheap, and come in lots of colors. get a candle color that correlates with the deity, but if you cant find one you can always use white. make sure its a new candle! and once you find something they would like, make sure you have an offering when you introduce yourself / reach out. for osiris i didnt have the incense he liked so i found a dying rose and blackberry jam. for apollo one time i found an orange berry and thought he would like it, but he said he didnt wanna keep it. i got dark chocolate for anubis, one of his favorites, but he didnt wanna talk to me so he declined keeping it. its not a big deal if a deity didnt want your offering (for the most part. i think i heard la santa muerto will physically knock things over if she doesnt like them. which means BE CAREFUL WITH CANDLES FOR HER!).

anyways. i say get a new fitting candle and fix up a place for it. i didnt have a place so i either did it on a clean / decluttered floor, or got a clean part of my nightstand. i called to them like this

"ancient [egyptian / greek / nordic / etc] god[dess] [NAME], i call to you. i would like to know if [you would like to work with me / you are here with me / etc]. in front of me is an offering to you."

heres something i found in my notes that i used for apollo. edit to fit whatever deity you were thinking of

i personally cant use pendulum for deities (my spirits will tinker with it), so i use fire divination. i ask

"[NAME], are you here right now? if you are here, [move the candle flame to the left / flicker the flame]."

if it doesnt move, they could be busy, they might not wanna talk, OR, for me, they save the flame flickering for a couple sessions afterward. i tell them that candle is for them and that every time i light it, i have them in mind. every time i light it, i also say out loud that this is for [NAME]. i noticed for apollo, his flame started to flicker to yes / no questions after a couple days of lighting the candle. i think he wanted consistency or dedication of some kind. hecate on the other hand REFUSEDDD to flicker the flame until i gave her a key offering. i found a spare copy of my house keys and gave her the shinier of the bunch. keys are her favorite, so she really liked it. thats also when we did tarot readings too.

all deities are different. i was met with a lot of umm. whats the word. i got discouraged super fast u know? most will not be like an eager puppy to talk to you. even if they wanna work with you or are interested in you. hecate waited very patiently for me yet made me wait and prove myself i guess in order to talk to her. i hope this made some sense. feel free to send me any more questions u have. i am kind of new to this too (-: and i started deity worship / work during a more chaotic part of my life so i felt like i rushed a bit into it. i did a lot of studying in a short amount of time so i think i am missing some things. rawwrrgh yeah thats what i can think of right now

#ask #sorry this is long GIGGLES

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kekisu · 4 years ago

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TOP 5 CHARAS AND 5 REASONS WHY YOU LIKE THEM GO GO GO

AHHHH OKAY OKAY. I LITERALLY LIT UP WHEN I SAW THIS IN MY INBOX YOU HAVE NOOOO IDEA THANK YOU SO MUCH ah okay. i hope its ok if i leave it to just one or two of my fav things about them though cause NFHBGDF I DONT WANT THIS TO BE MILES LONG i hope you understand!!!!!

1. LIGHT YAGAMI

now. i dont think anybodys surprised. MFKSKFMFMHNGJN honestly, though i dont care about death note much at all anymore, hes like gum stuck to my shoe and i just cannot get him off no matter what i do. i tell myself that i dont give a fuck about anything in death note until i see him on my dash and i go apeshit. hes completely changed me and how i approach analyzing complex characters. i think hes the first character that ive ever actually cared about in that sense? the sense where i look into every detail about him i mean. its really just so fun...

my absolute favorite thing about him... i really love how funny he is. this isnt to say hes a humorous guy im saying hes funny as in he makes such stupid decisions and its hilarious to see him struggle so hard constantly. the entire ending of death note is fucking insane it sends me into laughing fits every time. theres so many funny moments in death note despite it being considered a psychological horror animanga because of him being a genuine fucking idiot 24/7. hes supposed to be a genius but he truly does lack so much self awareness sometimes.

if you wanna know more of my thoughts in depth, i have an analysis of him here that you can check out :) ID LOVE FEEDBACK ON IT so if you disagree with me or have questions etc feel free to shoot an ask and ill try to answer!!!!!

2. GORO AKECHI

god... hes perfect. he and light are on the same level of favoritism for me, dont let the numbers fool you. hes hands down my absolute favorite in persona 5 and it blows my mind knowing that the majority of the fandom feels the exact opposite or are torn over him ITS ALMOST FRUSTRATING because its mostly due to the amount of misinformation/mischaracterization spread about him!!!! but no he just happens to be the best written character in that piece of shit of a game! MFDKDHNGJJ AND PERSONA FANS CANT COMPREHEND GOOD WRITING

my favorite thing about him.. i love how hes written. and i know this sounds really basic and predictable, but its the truth i just really love his growth as a character, especially in royals third semester when he gets a chance to properly shine and oh my god! did he shine! hes literally so perfect in 3rd sem

theres just something so captivating about an angry teenager who truly thinks of his life as worthless and doesnt bother making bonds with others because of it who suddenly finds himself questioning his choices of self isolation when he finally meets a group of people he can resonate with and feel seen by. a group of people who are willing to reach out and listen to him despite his past mistakes. theres just something so perfect about seeing that same angry teenager want to take his life into his own hands and strive to grow... that same angry teenager who didnt value his own life start to see meaning in things because of bonds...

i love goro so so much he makes me so emotional if it isnt obvious enough NGFHGDGBDFH I THINK ABOUT HIM A LOT. i think about him healing so much.

(btw im working on an analysis for him atm thats similar to lights so! stay tuned for that dropping when its done in like a million years NFHFBGFHDBGHF)

3. AKIRA KURUSU

DAMN 2 PERSONA 5 CHARACTERS IN A ROW

OKAY SO i know Technically akira is supposed to be a blank slate silent protagonist but let me tell you THATS SO FAR FROM WHAT HE ACTUALLY IS. IM NEVER FORGIVING ATLUS FOR TRYING TO SHOVE HIM INTO THE SILENT PROTAG BOX AND NOT LETTING HIM BE HIS OWN CHARACTER! BECAUSE HE HAS THE POTENTIAL TO BE AMAZINGGGGG ugh sorryfor caps im so fuckng mad MKDFKMGMHMGMG

it really does get on my nerves how because of atlus trying to make him a silent protag, the majority of the p5 fandom sees him as that. blank slate. nothing. when in reality he very much has a ton of spunk and id argue that hes his own character entirely if you just look a little deeper past the surface Like... its not even that hard to see personality in him. beneath the mask is literally his theme song, have you Not seen the lyrics to that? HAVE YOU NOT SEEN THE ENTIRE THEME OF THE GAME? this little dude is so traumatized and angry at those who wronged him (aka the justice system! shitty adults!) and people have the nerve to say hes the worst persona protagonist? lmfao

my favorite thing about akira is how he looks like a cat and how cocky and annoying he can be.. he is such a jokester hes the absolute dumbest. i enjoy this silly guy. *holds him under the armpits like a longcat*

4. SHIGEO KAGEYAMA

ahhh mob. he makes me do this -> :)

mp100, of course, changed my fucking life. mp100 is the reason i am the way i am and though all the characters are incredibly relatable and memorable and i cherish them so dearly, i, like most people, cherish mob the absolute most. seriously his strength really is incredible and though hes just a fictional character he is so inspiring and i wish to carry as much gentleness in my heart as he does.

im so so proud of him on his development he started off so.. i wouldnt say he was weak, but i would say that he lacked experience. he lived in his own little bubble not knowing what the world was like and throughout the story he grew to learn so much.. he learned to make such. mature decisions at such a young age. hes so so wise. hes so powerful not only because of his psychic powers but because of his compassion for others. he can befriend even the worst of people...

my favorite thing about him is his determination to become the best version of himself he can be. and also his relationship with ritsu (not me, i mean ritsu kageyama <3) i always gravitate towards siblings in fiction because im an only child and well <3 i dont experience that. so i like projecting onto them GHBFBBHFG they care so much for each other.. sniffle sniffle

5. RYO ASUKA

ok im going to be real even though im into devilman i dont have much of a reason to enjoy him this much. i just think hes hilarious and really cool and his satan form gives me gender envy. i love it when he commits random easily avoidable acts of violence for no reason at all its just because he wants to. and thats just fine. i think he can kill people and get away with it because hes ryo asuka. gay rights

#asks #dn #p5 #mp100 #devilman #long post #THANK YOU SOOO MUCH FOR THIS ASK

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adonis-koo · 5 years ago

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Missy :( I cant send you messages anymore. Anyway. I read Tease 16. Had to reread it tn bc of how negatively it affected me. Imma sum up some stuff. I. Diego with MC: fucking kill me 2. JK saying he loved MC when with Eva, Win. But strangle hold on his past -WHAT? Also in admitting MC love, I hope JK doesnt get hurt with his revelation. Also, his off limit thing? Intimate kissing? 3. MAIN THING: MC was anally raped by Diego. (More to come)

+ Why is JK not more affected? She was in that ordeal for at least 10 minutes while continuously crying out and sharing her pleads and safe words just for it to stop hurting. Does JKs head just not go that far? I feel people arent looking into it as much. All im picturing is myself crying while im anally raped and how horrific the pain and experience are. I KNOW MC is feeling the same. But it feels so swept under the rug. Could you just help me please make sense of the anal rape in this story

First and foremost I really am sorry this chapter affected you so negatively baby, it’s a lot of heavy subjects! During the draft I actually wrote out MCs smut scenes (albeit they weren’t depicted as harshly as this), and I decided to not as it just made me uncomfortable thinking about it in this context. Please feel free to skip any scenes that trigger anything unpleasant love! 🖤

Now as for Jungkook not being heavily affected- or at least showing it. Truthfully, I didn’t intentionally plan this but the more I look at his story as a whole, it makes sense that while this is upsetting, in a way, Jungkook is rather desensitized. I can’t go into details for multiple reasons pertaining to the plot but let’s just say he’s desensitized to sexual harassment as a whole. Is it upsetting?

Absolutely, but when Jungkook gets upset, he gets upset. And if it’s over something he’s powerless over, Jungkook would rather give what physically and emotional energy he has left after his own long night to comforting MC, as you said, she’s had a horrific night and she needs his support, rather then possibly stress her out further with threats of killing Diego Jungkook chooses to spend what’s left of his energy comforting her as best he can. So in a way, yes, Jungkook doesn’t think that far, because the moment he does is the moment he’ll lose his cool.

If you’re asking me to make sense on why I put it in the story; I don’t really have an intricate reason. The thing about assault, dub/non con or rape is that in real life, Theres rarely ever a reason it happens. It just happens and it’s disgusting. Part of the reason I chose this to happen was to really emphasize the reality of what they as strippers are dealing with at Seasonella and MC isn’t an exception, that this isnt okay. That, if MC didn’t have reason before to want Seasonella to get shut down she sure as hell does now. Again, this doesn’t really serve any purpose. I never want to use something like dub con or rape as a plot device in my fics. These are real traumas that many people struggle with.

As I’ve said in previous asks, the line of consent is heavily blurred in her implied scene with Diego, she definitely didn’t consent to it, but she never told Diego no. She very easily could’ve, but somewhere inside her brain, she chose to just grit her teeth and deal with it. She never gave him a safe word to use if things became to much. Maybe it was the shock? Some people feel like it was just her stupidity. Who knows. Some even consider it rape. It’s up to the readers interpretation of the scene. But I will say; this will definitely leave some sort of trauma with MC.

Maybe it doesn’t affect her everyday life, maybe she can still easily have sex with Jungkook. But it’s still there, it’ll still haunt her in those silent moments in the dark. It was excruciatingly painful and that’s something she’ll never forget. Seasonella is an arc that was intended to shine a darker reality on sex workers lives, for this story at least. It’s not all fun and games. People get hurt, people get assaulted. While I wrote this arc for other reasons this was one of many.

#missy answers #tease #alpharyth

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janustrash1 · 4 years ago

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my sides (masterpost)

hey, sorry that i haven't been posting at all recently. life has taken a bit of a slip downhill and things like my sleep schedule have been really out of wack. to make up for it i’ve decided to talk about and introduce you guys to some very special characters of mine. my sides.

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before i introduce them, i’d like to talk about what they mean to me. i got really into sanders sides at a very low point in my life. at this point i already had four characters that i considered my version of the main four sides. they didnt represent anything yet. i only knew that each of them were my version of a respective side. i had also started counselling at this point, and ended up talking to my councillor about sanders sides and how much i love the show and the dynamic. she encouraged me to take these characters and break them down into their essentials. making my first four sides.

i would talk to my sides whenever i needed to figure something out. i was able to take the multitude of thoughts going through my head and divide them off into things that each side was saying. this made everything much easier to manage in my head as it was basically the equivalent of talking to friends. however a year passed and a new train of thought started occurring. i tried applying it to an existing side but that didnt work so, i made a new one, my fifth side.

more recently, around the start of this year, i started having some, unpleasant, things happen with my mental state. i would hyper focus on too many things at once, meaning that i got little to no work done, i started having worsening intrusive thoughts, and i just all around felt a bad presence. once again, none of my sides were the ones causing this so, a new onw was made. my sixth and as of writing this, newest side.

my sides are a genuine coping mechanism for me. i have a rare profile of autism that makes it hard to understand my own emotions, and the sides help with that. they also act as someone i can tell everything to, and just generally help me feel less alone from time to time. im putting a lot out here to share a secret that i keep from most with the world, i would appreciate it if you guys would treat me just the same as always. side note: yes my sides have different genders and some arent the same as me biologically. they are made like this to capture how some of these aspects of me can sometimes be more prevalent depending on how i present myself. it also just made sense to me. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

anyways, now that we know where they came from. i would like to introduce you to them. first up, The four Main sides

Opal (Optimism)

opal is probably the happiest side in the mindscape. she represents my happiness and excitement, as well as some of the content and calm feelings, often relating to my image. before Allison, she was the one to offer words of encouragement when things slipped up. some of the sides refer to her as “Mom” and Allison will often just call her “Wife” Opal wears a lot of pale pink and soft greys, not really one for bright or bold colours, she has an assortment of different headbands and bows but is most often seen wearing a pink cat ear headband. she is a Pan Cis Woman and uses She/Her pronouns

Ray (Reasoning)

Ray represents everything about me that doesnt revolve around my imagination, as well as some things that do. they are my sense of reasoning, there to talk me out of an impossible situation and ground me back to reality. they are here to make plans and help me stay physically and mentally well in the most efficient way possible. i would say that they are the most like a canon side out of all of them, having an uncanny resemblance to Logan as far as function is concerned. they are the “left brain” of the sides. they wear a light blue polo shirt, keeping the collar in place with a neatly knotted scouts neckerchief. they are the only side to actually wear glasses, even though i myself need them but often dont wear them. they are biologically genderless and use Them/They pronouns.

Cameron (Confidence)

Cameron is the most eccentric of all the sides, constantly bellowing his ideas in the most sing-songy, theatrical voice. he is the brightest and most determined, constantly suggesting new and “foolproof” plans to get big and become famous. unfortunately, these “foolproof” plans are often made by a fool. He doesnt always see the bigger picture, much like Opal, he always keeps his eyes on the prize, to such an extent that he often skips steps in his plan. he often wears fancy blue jackets, but his more casual wear is a royal blue button up over a white t shirt. He is a Cis man who uses He/Him pronouns.

Percival (Paranoia)

Percival, or as we all call them, Percy, is the most quiet and reserved out of all of the sides, only kicking off when something could go wrong. when they were first created, they would do this constantly, however as time has progressed they have realised how this can be a hinderance more than a help, and has taken to not really speaking unless necessary. they are one of the ImagiSiblings, along with Ivory, they were temporarily separated as i got older however, and now they are quite scared of what ivory has become and will keep their distance when possible, but has shown that they very much can still be a brilliant older sibling to the younger side. they are often wrapped in a red blanket, with a black long sleeved shirt and leggings poking out from underneath. when they have to leave the house however, they throw on a red plaid hoodie and a black facemask, a new addition to their wardrobe. they are also biologically genderless and use Them/They pronouns.

now, my fifth side, created around a year and a half after the main 4

Allison (Protection) (Formerly Anger)

Allison was first created as a way to filter out some of the more angry and violent thoughts in my head and make sense of them. they never really seemed like the violent type, more like a protective mother, a role that they very much fulfil better, therefore they were recently changed and allowed to focus more on protecting me and my friends. they have a lot of.... violent suggestions, but they do genuinely care for me and often stay up with me during sleepless nights, helping me get through the following day. they often wear an oversized blue shirt under an even more oversized black cardigan with a black trilby/fedora hat, sometimes switching the hat out for a plain beanie in the winter. they also carry my headphones in case i need a reminder that i always have music as a way to control my thoughts. they are an AFAB Demigirl and uses Them/They pronouns with female titles (miss, mom etc.)

and finally, my newest side, created around march of this year

Ivory (Impulse)

Ivory was created to explain the constant creative itch i get whenever there are too many ideas. they started off as a sweet, excitable child, but are quick to change when they dont get their way. they are able to shapeshift and will sometimes become threatening and scary if the creative itch isnt met to their standards. they are also the source of most of my intrusive thoughts, often thinking that their suggestions will help. overall they are probably the most dangerous side and we still do not know much about them. their clothes often change but one thing that always remains is a jacket that i actually own covered in various embroidery and collected patches. sometimes this will be worn over a simple t-shirt, sometimes over a black button up. they are the youngest of the sides, being around 10 physically. im not yet sure of their gender but they seem to like Them/They pronouns

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and there you have it. theres my sides. it honestly feels good to have written this all down and have it in a convenient place to be able to show people. i hope you like them just as much as i do, if you have any further questions feel free to send me an ask or re-blog this post.

thank you so much to any of you who have read this far, i really appreciate it.

#sanders sides #sanderssides #thomassanders #thomas sanders #@thatsthat24 #my sides #mysides #my sanders sides #mysanderssides #characters #original characters #ocs #masterpost

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the-walnut · 6 years ago

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Night Vale + Scientists

Alrighty, I’m relatively new to this fandom and all, so I’m not entirely sure how well this actually coincides with canon and whatnot, but I’m going to feel free to vocalize this anyway.

We all know from relatively early on in this particularly lovely podcast that Carlos the “Perfectly Imperfect” Scientist has an unrivalled passion for the unexplained. The idea of mystery drives him crazy, and he chases blindly after anything that doesn’t have a feasible answer, that can’t be understood, that seems far too beyond human comprehension to decode- a trait that, I will argue to my last dying breath, is part of why he fell head-over-kettle in love with Cecil Palmer, perhaps the most mysterious and unexplainable character in the show, and the first impossible riddle he wasn’t hell-bent on solving

Cecil, though, is the exact opposite of his counterpart. See, Cecil’s job is announcing the happenings of Night Vale, not analyzing them. When something occurs out of the ordinary, he doesn’t always need a ‘why’- in fact, in most regards, Cecil’s pretty content to just have a general grasp of what’s going on or what to expect from something and roll with the punches. Animal carcasses raining from the sky? Don’t panic, just get a stronger umbrella. The sun didn’t rise today? You know, that happens sometimes. It’ll pass!

It makes sense, in this fashion, for the fandom to naturally come to the conclusion that Cecil is terrible when it comes to science. I’ve seen a lot of posts and fanart about the worst accidents in the lab being Cecil’s doing, and while they’re amusing, I have another perspective to bring to the metaphorical table.

What we often seem to forget is that, while Carlos always seems to come to the right conclusions at the right times, and make sense of an insensible world, he’s still an Outsider. Night Vale is a curious thing to most of its occupants, let alone an individual who wasn’t born and raised there. There’s a lot of stuff about this one unique speck in the desert that even Carlos doesn’t know anything about, and I have no doubt in my mind that it would hinder him sometimes.

So instead, in the early stages of their relationship, I can imagine Cecil waking up to a call from a frustrated Carlos, going off on an absolute venting tangent from the lab at 4:37 A.M. And at first, it’s a bit of a shock to both of them because, well, from Cecil’s end it is 4:37 A.M. on a Wednesday, and he’s talking particle theory with a man who probably should’ve tried getting some sleep three days ago at the rate he’s going, but all the other members of Carlos’ team have long since gone home, and he usually finds it helpful to go step-by-step through his experiments vocally to catch any mistakes or hash out new ideas.

After at least a full forty-five minutes of Carlos rambling into the phone about how the molecular bonding of this solution shouldn’t be even remotely close to what it is, and that he can’t understand why it keeps giving off such staggeringly different temperatures with each batch he makes, Cecil (getting over his initial surprise that Carlos is calling him of all people) gently reminds him that maybe he’d best rest and think about it again with a clear head.

“Try some of that raspberry oolong Intern Stephen dropped off earlier this week,” He suggests brightly, explaining that it’s supposed to help with clarity and that the crushed beetle wings in the mixture hardly throw off the taste at all. “And remember to whisper a compliment to the water before you try to boil it- it can get fussy otherwise, you know. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve forgotten and wound up with a solid block of ice in my kettle or, worse, the kettle itself melting all over the countertop. Terrible to get out of the carpet later in that case, but as long as you’re cordial, it should boil nicely for you.”

And at first, there’s dead silence on the other end of the line, before Cecil can hear Carlos scrambling to make a note on this development, because of course he wasn’t whispering anything to the water he’d used in his experiment, and that’s probably the reason for 74% of the problems he’s come across so far.

It doesn’t take long for this to become a normal occurrence, Carlos calling in regularly with all kinds of questions and, as before, just needing to talk through something, Cecil offering advice on how to handle certain stuff, or even just talking a while about the things Carlos is working with. More often than not, this leads to some kind of revelation, because while Cecil might not understand the science behind why glass stirring rods need to be used only in a clockwise direction, he at least knows that they just do, and that’s what Carlos needs.

Eventually, this extends to the rest of the lab crew as well, because, yes, they might be Night Vale residents, but there’s a pretty large chunk of information about their town that even they are missing. With how quickly things can come up or change in their spooky little town, it can be impossible to keep track of everything on one’s own. Tentatively at first, but with growing speed, the other scientists begin asking for advice and extra help with info as well.

Catching on to the trend, a new addition makes its way into Cecil’s radio show, where, every day, scientists can send in questions for the citizens of Night Vale, and they can respond accordingly, offering insight. If nothing else, it serves as a reminder to those listening in on the broadcast that their scientists don’t miraculously have the answers to everything, and that the downside to having the entire population of your city looking to you for those answers is sometimes not having any.

Even those who don’t have knowledge to offer find ways to help. Scientists return home, weary beyond measure from saving their friends and family from yet another disaster, only to find the lights already dimmed and welcoming, old takeout containers thrown away, and bed made. There’s a note on the table that would be eery and concerning, were it not for the sensation that there had always been a presence in their home, and, if nothing else, this only confirms one of their many hypothesises, setting another theory down to rest. Creatures (that definitely are not angels) appear in the lab every now and then, bringing with them a smiling old woman, and several Big Rico’s pizza boxes, cases of bottled water, and bundles of grapes. Nobody knows why grapes in particular. Maybe the not-angels have an affinity for them. Either way, the mandatory snack break is welcomed by many. Secret police mutter helpful tips from bushes under open windows, and, despite books being banned, once in a blue moon a torn-out page from some volume makes it’s way onto a given scientist’s lab table, curating many more questions, and causing many to reevaluate their perceptions of the harrowing librarians, the hooded figures who show no fear of them, and the public library itself.

Night Vale is a place of mystery and intrigue and danger- but it is also a place of people bonded by experience and survival. It’s a place called “home” by many, even if they do not necessarily understand it, and these are the people who save this city by supporting discovery in their own little ways. Night Vale loves its scientists, and it will do what it can to help them understand it even a little bit more.

#night vale #nightvale #cecil palmer #carlos the scientist #cecilos #welcome to night vale #welcome to nightvale #WTNV #wtnv headcanons

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normal-thoughts-official · 5 years ago

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Ok uhhh claia, lukemaryse and malec superhero au headcanons

first of all, id just like to say that i love this new trend of u guys sending me really vague prompts and giving me complete creative freedom to do whatever i want with them. i think it really shows that u trust me to create good, interesting content, and that means a lot to me. second of all, that trust is entirely misplaced. why would you ever think that id make something good. have you met me. what im trying to say here is basically: this is your own fault

behold:

In a world where everyone has a superpower, the world is bound to work a little different. No one knows what determines people's superpowers; some are fairly common (like teleportation, which led to a lot of ppl working as cabs, taking ppl to and from wherever they need) and others are unique and particularly powerful (and also dangerous, which is why particularly powerful people are part of an elite squad dedicated to keep the world safe; our very own superheroes)

Alec's superpower is definitely unique: he can sense trash. That's it. Hes just going around, living his life, sensing trash. He knows when people are littering. He can sense it from a pretty far away distance. Everywhere he goes, he knows where all the trash cans are. His life is just. Him and the trash, everywhere, haunting him

No one's ever heard of this before. Alec's mom, maryse, can bend all four elements, and is part of the Elite Squad; so is his father, although he retired from action and works behind a desk now. His sister izzy has superspeed and was trained to perfect combat in the hopes she would follow their footsteps, but ultimately decided to give it up and become a biologist instead. And Alec. Can sense trash

This was the source of a lot of Family Drama, since alec's parents were pretty strict and held their position as elite superheroes with pride, expecting nothing less from their children. But after many years of trying and failing to somehow make up for it, Alec decided to say fuck them and fully embraced who he is, refusing to live in apology. Once he finally left their house to live on his own, maryse realised he meant wanting to cut them off his life for real, and came around. Robert's lack of understanding was one of the factors that led to their divorce

Alec became an architect and works to build better and efficient waste collection systems in the country. Due to his power, he knows which places need the most infrastructure investment, as well as the problems that lead to the littering. He also knows which companies are illegally discarding their waste and how, the exact effects of that on the environment, and a lot of stuff that would otherwise only be possible through extensive research. He is an activist for both a better public, free, universal waste removal system, and stricter regulations on companies that profit from environmental destruction.

And the thing is, he likes this life. He's passionate about it. Everyday at work he gets to do a little something to make the world better and fight against injustice and use his place of privilege that comes from his education and his so-called "useless" superpower for change. He wouldn't trade it for the world and he's really passionate about what he does, even if it does take up most of his time

So when his mom comes in one day saying that a new villain named Trash Man is going around and killing people and they need his help to track him, Alec is not. amused.

First of all: Trash Man? come on

But he kind of has no choice, since this is top priority at the moment and the very ministery of security is calling him or something - every citizen is required to register their powers so they know exactly when they're needed

So he goes, and for the first time, he meets the rest of his mom's Top Secret team; first of all, there's the leader, Luke: his power is persuasion and hes very good at de-escalating events to guarantee minimal damage and better solutions, making him the most valuable asset of the team. Then there's Maryse, and under them, a team of relatively young, but very powerful, heroes: maia, a shapeshifter; clary, who can summon weapons and is very good at Stabbing; and Magnus, who can bend time and space

Magnus is also kind of the Group Genius; his power also got him an special interest in physics and chemistry, meaning that he is not only able to use his power intelligently and creatively, but effectively enhance it; he's also very good with tech and responsible for a lot of their non-power-related assets. Honestly, he likes that part way better than the crime-fighting blah blah blah, but he kind of has no choice over what he does because he's an orphan and extremely powerful, meaning he's viewed as a threat by the government while simultaneously being dependant on them, and would pretty much have nowhere to turn to if he didnt start working for them

But really, he wants to be a scientist. He wants to do good things. He wants to create stuff that will make people's lives, and the world, better. He doesn't even believe in this whole "crime fighting" shit; he believes in a just world crime would be minimal and using their resources to fight bad guys instead of working on crime prevention is an absolute waste. But it's not like anybody asked for his opinion.

Alec and Magnus immediately hit it off; Alec was kind of tense at first because surely these guys would have the world's hugest chip on their shoulder, right? But instead everyone welcomes him, and Magnus kind of jokes that he envies him, which takes him by surprise

Because Maia and Clary are both Magnus' great friends as well, Alec also gets closer to them; Clary can be a little self-centered and annoying, but she's cool and Maia always calls her out on it. Maia is a fierce, amazing, smart girl and Alec can totally see why she and Magnus are so close, with their similar sense of humor, shared experiences (Maia is not an orphan but she ran away from home when she was pretty young), and gleaming, almost mischievous intelligence and talent. Alec can hold a conversation with them alright, since as an architect he needs quite some knowledge of physics and as an activist he can also hold pretty good and deep conversations with them about the system and its flawed, unjust logic; but there are some topics they get into that just kind of escalate and seem to get them in their own little world. Alec finds himself watching from the sidelines sometimes, and while he admires that - and doesnt miss the way clary will sometimes sit beside him and watch them as well, a small smile on her face that tells him everything he needs to know - he finds himself... a little upset by it, too

Not that he has a problem with them, but he finds himself wanting to feel like he belongs, and that's kind of- new. It's not like his life is a sad wet sock of loneliness or anything, he has his sister, he has some friends, but he's a private kind of guy and he finds himself more comfortable at the sidelines than the spotlight, except when it comes to his work, because hes good at that

It's just his luck, then, that Trash Man turns out to be really smart and hard to track due to [vague plot noises], giving him all the time he needs to, well, figure this out

So he spends more time with them, particularly Magnus. The both of them will sometimes sit talking for hours, and soon learn a lot about each other. Magnus listens, enraptured, whenever Alec goes on a passionate Trash Rant™ and Alec is always in awe by Magnus' smart solutions. They begin some sort of camraderie that's also laced with Magnus' oh-so-smooth flirting, which started strong and eventually died out as Magnus began to realize he really liked Alec and his usual confidence and devil-may-care attitude vanished. But Alec mistakes this as Magnus losing interest or him seeing things. Cue lots of mutual pining

At least once Alec gets thrown through a wall by some villain; but, little did he know, it wasnt just a normal wall that he broke; it was the fourth wall. Alec looks straight into the reader's eyes, and goes: "I can sense trash. That's why, in this AU, i was never friends with jace". Then Magnus comes in and takes him back to the other side of the wall, and Alec blinks, confused, not remembering what had just happened. This is never mentioned again

Idk theres some gay shit in here, Alec introduces Magnus to Izzy and Magnus is absolutely in awe with her work. Izzy specializes in pollinators and works trying to restore the bee population and guarantee a more sustainable environment. Her work crosses with Alec's a surprising amount of times, and Magnus, who loves both animals and the incredible amount of knowledge her research requires, and they become super good friends almost immediately, which makes Alec very pleased.

More gay shit, Alec and Magnus decide to team up to try and get Clary and Maia together, only to be knocked sideways when they find out they're already dating. Maryse is like "do the four of you ever work" and Alec is hit with the realisation that his mom, too, kind of lives in the sidelines when it comes to things that arent work; luke seems to be kind of the mediator between her and the rest of the team, which is kind of sad. She does seem to have a good relationship with Luke, tho

Eventually they defeat Trash Man and Alec is no longer required to work for them and can go back to his trash activism; and when he does, so does Magnus, who is invited to work with izzy's team, which he gladly accepts

Somehow Alec confesses? And Magnus is in awe because he of course never expected Alec to like him back but. It turns out Alec is the most confident out of the two of them despite their exterior telling most people otherwise. And Magnus just says that yes he likes him back and will go out with him and they kiss passionately in the middle of the lab surrounded by bees but there are also flowers so theres that. And then they get married. I mean not right after but some years later

Magnus leaving inspires the rest of them, in some ways; Maia, Luke and Maryse start actually fighting to change the crime fighting policies to investment in crime prevention because new supervillains will always keep coming. The romantic tension between them finally snaps and they start going out. Maryse seems like such a different person now, more open and happier. Alec is pleased

They save the bees and the trash and the impending environmental apocalypse that looms over us is avoided idk that's all Ive got

Again this is your fault

The end

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ultimatestellar · 5 years ago

Note

Mikuuuuuuu eheehee

send me a character!!

miku miku oo ee oo. in my attempt to find more interests ive been getting really into vocaloid lately so good timing!!

favorite thing about them:

miku sounds!! so!! good!!! theres a reason shes cryptons mascot vocaloid. honestly if you can tune her well it can end up a masterpiece. and also just how much people care about her. the best thing about vocaloid is how much our favorite producers and really just the fanbase cares and makes us love these characters!! vocaloid as a concept comes down to what the community makes of it and the community has made me love miku.

also she pretty

least favorite thing about them:

please..... let me like more then 2 characters with canon personalities...... i can only make so many headcanons...........

eh who am i kidding i can always make more headcanons. but it is kinda annoying having every iteration of her be different (even if that is the whole point). but as long as i brush it off as “oh its just them performing” im cool with it :))

favorite line:

oh fuck i have to choose?? i dont have a list of miku quotes what am i supposed to say?? honestly you can choose a random wowaka song and id say youre right.

pinnochiop has some really good lines too but they arent as impactful and more just a mood.

brOTP:

her and len. her and len. her and len. or her and kaito but mostly her and len because those two can and will vibe check you

OTP:

mikurin!! because i found out the age difference between her and luka and went “oh shit i didnt realize i was supporting this” and went to find a new ship. turns out mikurin is canon in the project diva universe!! point being i got sucked in very quickly and these two are just so cute together,,,

nOTP:

shipping her with meiko. i just see meiko as an adult and miku is quite literally my age so i guess makes sense?? idk i have vocaloid ships that i hate much more cough cough rin x len cough so i cant hate on anything else too much.

random headcanon:

miku loves sweaters. she never gets to wear them because crypton is like YOU MAY ONLY WEAR REVEALING OUTFITS SO PEOPLE BUY YOUR MERCH but when she gets any free time she will immediately get an oversized sweater and just vibe. maybe with a movie playing. and popcorn. and rin. and rin and her start throwing popcorn at eachother during a really serious scene and ruin the movie but its okay cause they had fun which is what really matters to them and—

i guess a bonus one: since theyre androids they cant experience a lot of the stuff theyre singing about (darker stuff like losing a loved one or something as simple as food) so miku especially will look at the lyrics and try VERY HARD to imagine what all this would actually feel like. being virtual has its downsides yall!!

unpopular opinion:

other vocaloids deserve more attention, but that doesnt mean miku is overrated!! shes good and deserves the hype and just because others do as well but dont get it doesnt mean she shouldnt have it either.

song i associate with them:

...really?

ill just list off the best miku songs i can think of.

to start us off, rolling girl. because of course https://youtu.be/NIqm73xsias

youtube

white happy. this has been one of my favorite vocaloid songs for ages. i dont know if thisll just sound like im trying to be edgy or whatever but i really do feel like this is how i view the world but written out in all its optimistic nihilism glory and i LOVE IT. it even has my self worth issues down!! wow look at that this song is all of my problems wrapped up in a happy little tune!!! https://youtu.be/k_WT2x9we0Q okay maybe this one is my favorite

youtube

whats inside. as said before pinnochiops songs are all just honest and as a result this song especially is just a mood. https://youtu.be/GSpwTvYgFrM

youtube

liar dance!! i just think it sounds good. i couldnt find a good english sub but its probably written on the wiki https://youtu.be/FOvfM0fe-FE

youtube

world is mine. i dont have to explain this one. https://youtu.be/KMHXgUr7gYM

youtube

favorite picture of them:

no way am i going to try and pick ONE miku module when so many of them are equally pretty, so instead heres a picture of her i use as a reaction image sometimes!!

and thats it!!

thanks for sending an ask ninashiki, u the best ;))

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ncityzen · 6 years ago

Note

Ship your mutuals w nct 👀

so…i’m so sorry for taking so long to write this but here it is. i had a bit of a dilemma because i didn’t really know who i should include and i really didn’t want to leave anyone out who’d possibly want me to do this so i’ve decided to turn this into some sort of ask game or whatever so if we’re mutuals and you aren’t tagged below, feel free to send me an ask and i will do this for you because believe me i most probably wanted to include you as well but i’m kind of tragic when it comes to socialising :((((((

also i hope you don’t mind but i’m changing this up a little bit and instead of shipping (i’d just “ship” you all with your biases tbh how can i not) i’m just going to say who i think you’d get along with so i guess it’s more like friends???? sorry again fsdkjlk

@lqcoups: lipi i remember i did something like this before but it was based on your appearance only so this time i’m gonna change it up a little and say mark!!! i know you love the canada boy and i think your personalities would go really well together i don’t know how to elaborate on that but believe me they would skfjlsjd this is what you get for being the person i know the best on here

@mawrklee: cat you have got to be one of the most adorable people on here so i’m going to say you’d get along well with taeyong!! you’re both really sweet people but at the same time very very funny at all the right moments and tbh i just want you to be treated with kindness which is exactly the kind of friend taeyong would be (believe me it took me a lot of effort not to say mark sjdklfjs)

@taeilrmoon maja you are so funny sometimes i’d like to take your tags/posts and give them to weekly idol or something (didn’t i tell you once sm should hire you??? you’re just really employable), and i know you enjoy doing sport which is why i’m saying either jaehyun or yuta!!! jaehyun is an underrated funny person and being his friend with your amazing wits could only be good to make his potential shine. yuta doesn’t need an explanation

@seoyoungho: hello to one of the funniest and kindest people ever?? just because of that i’m very tempted to say taeil!! i feel like you bring out the best in people and make everyone just feel instantly at ease which would go really well with taeil’s personality i think!! you’d both also make the greatest comedic duo ever johnny would be begging you to give him his title as the funny guy back

@cheolz: shivani my favourite smart and funny mutual there’s no doubt here and i’m gonna go with yuta. i feel like you both probably have a similar sense of humour, and you’re both very eloquent people i’d honestly love to hear you debating on stuff, not to mention the fact that you both like football, and although it is yet unknown if yuta likes barça (he has to or i’m disowning him) i believe in the force of your friendship and your great arguments to bring him to the side of truth

@berryjaelliaes millie the sweetest little thing out there omg i’m going to say you and jeno would be good friends!! i don’t know if you like cats but you seem like you do sdfjkls also you’re both very cute people who radiate nothing but happy energy and make people smile just by looking at them (or seeing you on my dash)

@qiankupid: i know we haven’t been mutuals for long but you’re on here because you’re an incredibly nice person and i love seeing you on my dash. it’s doyoung for you!! from what i’ve gathered from our time being mutuals you guys seem a bit similar! i thought you were really eloquent in that audio tag and very entertaining at the same time, you’re also very funny and doyoung is in my top 3 funniest nct members so i’m sure you’d both get along really well

#seriously if anyone else wants me to do this for them just ask me #it took me so long to do because i just wanted to include everyone sjdkfljfd #also i've done people who i know post a lot about nct #anon #ask #long post

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scarletrebel · 6 years ago

Note

⭐star⭐ waffle at me about your favourite lines youve written

ohhh friend you have opened a pandoras box and i hope you are ready also thank you aha

so i started…….. picking some lines and made the Executive Decision to just do one fic because i was planning on doing a couple from a handful of fics but turns out im far too prone to waffling about this kind of stuff because i love picking things apart and figuring out why they work because i love fuckign words and the things they evoke and stuff so yeah this is just some fave lines from most recent fic, requital.

this was part of a ‘directors cut’ writer thing and if anyone has any more prompts, feel more than free to send them my way!

Requital, Chp. 1:

His honesty, wrapped tightly underneath a chivalrous act; a throwaway comment to soften the exposure of such a question, draws her closer.

She kisses him, and hopes that even though the motion is countless in the amount of times they’ve come together, that the answer is plain enough. A claim, she hears her own words in her head, tasting the tobacco of his morning cigarette on her tongue, the warmth of the pull at his hands on her hips.

so whilst i cant say this section was directly inspired by the ecdysis book, what i can say is that there is definitely some influence going on here, in particular these two lines from the page ‘synesthesia’:

“Wu Ming is a bonfire in the darkness, and she crawls toward his warmth.”

“Wu Ming leaves his questions by the wayside as he is drawn inexorably into the gravity well of her desperate honesty.”

and thats not something i realised until i was writing the final draft, and im pretty pleased with myself considering not only is requital going to examine some of the similarities between avia and drifter, but also the fact that ecdysis is probably my favourite book. i mean…… ‘drawn inexorably into the gravity well of her desperate honesty’ what the FUCK KIND OF LINE its gorgeous i cant deal with it or this book or this page or how desperately gorgeous the tragedy of drifter and orins relationship is

also…… look. im a hopeless romantic. always have been, probs always will be, so when i say avia and rook are soulmates i mean it in the cheesiest way possible. right before this is rook feeling a bit self-conscious about the whole awoken engaging thing, and theres no way avia can actually put into words how irrevocably in love she is with rook. so she kisses him, and hopes beyond hope that she can put those feelings into motions if not words. i also enjoy the small bit of possessiveness that came out of her too, because the whole ‘claim’ thing with the awoken was there since the first draft but this section came in the final edit, she thinks of it so casually but when she goes on to say that she’d actually duel anyone who came between them i…….. would not put it past her to be 100% down to do that.

rook isnt a bonfire in the darkness, he’s an anchor in the deep, a solid tether when the sea becomes a storm.

(ayyy where the FUCK WAS THAT WHEN I WAS WRITING THIS)

Requital Chp. 2:

Here’s the thing, if you’ve gone through the trouble of decrypting this (a fortified certain-eyes-only encryption that took me a couple of hundred years to perfect, thank you very much), it at least means you’re interested, so hear me out.

i like this line a lot, for a few reasons. drifter knows avia well enough at this point to be well acquainted with her temper and lack of time for dealing with his nonsense. it’s the first flick of the coin between the two of them, drifter laying the proverbial gauntlet down and at the end of the day, its up to her whether or not she picks it up.

and she does, avia asks levi to decrypt it, and the first thing she sees is drifter acknowledging that shes done so and asking her to at least hear him out. he’s kind of caught her out, and she can respect that even if thats not at the forefront of her mind. avia also has her own brand of curiosity when it comes to people like the drifter, so this is kind of the first inkling of that. and it also (i hope) makes you wonder if drifter is aware of that curiosity that she has, if he sent the message decrypted on purpose to get her interested.

She smiles at the note, throws her legs over the bed and stretches around a yawn. Five minutes later, Levi puts her in her armour.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stick around?” The Ghost asks. “We don’t have anything urgent to do. There’s breakfast here.”

Avia hums, considering. She moves into the kitchen, glances over the fridge, the cupboards. She looks then onto the sofa, the sprawled pillows, untidy blankets. Suddenly the armour on her body feels heavy, out of place, like the metal has no right being somewhere like this.

“No. I’m not hungry, let’s go.”

“Okay,” Levi says in that tone of voice that lets her know they aren’t buying it. “Should we walk, or transmat?”

Avia notices the balcony door is still open. She walks over and closes it, the streets barely alive as one or two civilians walk to and fro, glancing idly at each other as they pass. “Transmat.”

avia immediately makes an comment about being all domestic with rook in chapter 1. its just not something that suits her in her own mind, and that line (even though i havent waffled about it bc dear god theres too much here already) was something i immediately knew i wanted if i was going to write a day of domestic bliss with her and her fiance, because i knew it’d be a hard thing for her to just get on with like a normal person aha.

so, we get this part in chapter 2. the domestic bliss is over, and what avia knows best, what shes always known best, is a set of armour and getting back to work. however this part of herself contradicts that which she’s experienced for the past day, and especially the line ‘Suddenly the armour on her body feels heavy, out of place, like the metal has no right being somewhere like this.’ i put in to really reinforce that idea. its not the metal that feels out of place in this scene, its the person in the metal. and her eagerness to transmat straight to the tower rather than walk through the peaceful city streets shows her tendency to run from such thoughts.

this part came really naturally, actually. its a small snapshot into a bigger struggle avia has with herself (especially given the dreaming city, the reef, petra and now potentially going back to the worst part of the shore with drifter) of where she belongs, and more importantly, if she deserves to belong. which is why levi talks to her in that tone because they know what shes doing, theyve seen it so many times before – avia in a scenario that resembles something normal and running from it with no one around to stop her, because in her subconscious she doesnt believe she deserves it.

“Ada-1, I believe, has fully settled into the Tower. She becomes more and more tolerable of the Guardians by the day. And with the discovery of Niobe labs, her mood has been favourable.”

i had no idea how fun scarlet was to write until i got to this part. she almost has her own language, really. writing ‘im really proud of ada because i spent all morning with her and she was only snippy with like two guardians and shes been really uplifted and im really happy for her since they found niobe labs’ in scarlets own ‘okay but heres the relevant information’ way of explaining things is a challenge but FUN. like, really fun??

because scarlet wouldnt be mentioning adas mood if she didnt care, ya know? and its not that she cant say that longer thing about being proud and stuff, its just that she doesnt see the sense in it and its not important information. like, if avia and eden were to spend a dedicated amount of time whittling her down she would absolutely say ‘i am so proud of ada and also i wanna smooch her face how do i do that as an exo’ but its just not a thing for her. but part of the reason why ada and scarlet being together was an idea that i had was because i imagine that line of thinking probably suits ada.

“It was at Ada’s request. I had more knowledge of the area in its current state, and felt more comfortable talking to Ikora and her Hidden agents than Ada did…”

supportive exo girlfriends. that is all. man ive gotta write more about these two

“Hmm,” Ada wears a concerned stare masked behind a formal rigidity that Avia knows her Warlock teammate best for.

if im being honest, i just really enjoy this line. i imagine its hard for exos to show concern, esp a character like ada and my girl scarlet, so avia has spent a lot of time dissecting certain facial cues and yeah im proud of how this description came out aha

…as if she hadn’t spent the past few months clipping sidelong comments and threatening him when his Gambit veered out of the realm of her control.

avia is a control freak. plain and simple, and i wanted to make that as obvious as possible considering this sentence is only a few away from avia choosing to go and talk to drifter.

there’s a certain amount of ‘i need to understand this thing that i have limited knowledge on so i can predict/control/plan for it in the future’ in how avia views drifter in general, its a kind-of warlock way of thinking about things but the big difference is avias need for control in these situations is a) selfish and b) only applies to things that she knows she has a good chance of understanding/taming. shes not going around learning about the hive because she has a good understanding that thats a cosmic threat that can only be defended against until it comes. drifter on the other hand is on her doorstep.

i also really loved the contradiction in putting ‘gambit’ and ‘control’ next to each other in a sentence, i kinda hoped it showed how conflicted avia is about going and talking to drifter, and maybe even how naive it is of her to think that it could turn out okay.

She was incensed, maybe, at the way he spoke to Ada, needed to go and stomp the idea out of his head but he got her talking, like he does

i like this line bc its avia acknowledging that she knows how shes viewed. she knows everyone sees her as a hot-head, she knows her anger veers away from her sometimes and whilst she’s gotten better at getting a handle on it, it’s still an aspect of her that people who dont know her well enough find it hard to get past.

i also enjoy how new people to this fic/avia in general might not know that this is a big part of her? so she’s trying to use it as an excuse, ‘well no one can blame me if i say i got really mad because thats what i do’ and it (hopefully) tells new people about that aspect of her character without having to show the worst part of it, the convo with ada being an introduction to it i guess – especially since the past few scenes have seen her a lot softer than im used to writing aha.

“Dammit,” she mutters under her breath. And walks towards the Drifter before she can make a better decision

fun fact – this line was originally ‘and walks down the corridor before she can make a better decision.’

i changed it because i wanted to make it more obvious that avia is making a conscious decision to choose drifter, that she’s walking towards a path that she knows is not a good idea. it provides foreshadowing for the allegiance quest and referring to him as ‘The Drifter’ cements it as an idea that she’s walking towards and not necessarily a person.

#ask thing #thanks buddy!!!#this was really fun #im such a fucking nerd someone put me in the bin honestly ahahaha #jadeisadork.txt

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night-springs · 7 years ago

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MARY idk if uve talked abt this before but what was violets relationship w/ julius like?? im super curious

KDSFHSDKF MICAH im so excited to talk abt this oh my god tysm….. also im so fucking sorry this took so long, i had way too much to say about it… ok so for context, violets canon playthrough order is vice kings > carnales > rollerz

…also, since its super obvious when reading this, i always wanted julius’ seemingly blatant distaste for johnny to have come into play in some form at like… any point in the series really. but since volition never went anywhere with it im taking it into my own lil gremlin hands

(background to this interpretation of julius)

in a word it was.. complicated. they were never close. when they met, julius was just looking for more recruits, the saints needed all the help they could get, but he thought he saw something in that skinny, terrified kid when him and troy saved her from being caught in the middle of a turf war. plus the kid owed him a life debt, and that aint a bad thing to have in his position. but, to violet… sure his speech about taking back the city to “save lives” was nice and all, but its not why she joined. she was homeless, starving, had nowhere to go and no options. she didnt even really have to think about the offer, becoming a saint just made sense. it was a step towards something, even if she didnt know exactly what it was, and so violet showed up in the churchyard the very next morning

from julius’ pov, violet took to fighting like a fish to water. capable, willing to do whatever it took, never talked back or questioned orders, and owed him their loyalty? to be honest she was basically the perfect little soldier. he thought this kid had a serious chance of being one of their key members… and he wasnt wrong. but in truth violet was terrified. when troy took her to buy a gun and had her kill someone for the first time with it, she managed to keep it together until she dropped him off and he was just out of sight. then she vomited all over the passengers seat of the car. the constant terror made it hard for her to sleep at night. a broken nose, bloody bandages over cuts from close calls with stray bullets, too many bruises to count and it didnt take long for her knuckles to become more scars than skin. for a while she was arguably more of a wreck than she was before she joined up

but at the same time, joining up improved things for violet. before this shed been sleeping in an alleyway, but now at night she could sleep in the church, and the other saints were friendly to her. then, when she got her first share of money? she went and bought herself a full meal and almost cried on the spot. soon, after pocketing as much cash as she could from dead rival gangsters wallets, she saved enough to get a loft right in saints row, and it was a shitty one, but she didnt fucking care. she loved that loft. from her point of view, julius was giving her the chance to save her own life. all she had to do in return was kill people for him. and she rationalized it to herself that way. if she had to kill other people to survive, then so be it

….and then violet began to realize how much of an adrenaline junkie she is, and holy fuck did she love to fight. if she had an opportunity to ditch the gun and just go in with a bat or even just her fists, she took it. the rush of risking her life became something she thought was fun. plus the respect she got as a saint? people were afraid of her, and she had anyone wearing purple on her side. the thrill, the power, the money, the loyalty… without her even really realizing it, running with gangs went from a means to an end to something that she enjoyed. but this change happens slowly, over the course of taking over stilwater. in truth, julius’ betrayal was what finally tipped her all the way

julius starts to hate her before they even finish off the vice kings. hed assigned her to helping out gat first, thinking even if dex was overseeing everything, their youngest lieutenant would need someone who could handle it if one of his crazy plans went south. but the trail of carnage and destruction violet and johnny left behind was the exact opposite of what julius wanted. he thought itd be over once the VKs were finished and he could assign violet to working with another (more stable) lieutenant, but after gat had taken that shotgun blast to the knee to help the kid escape and shed gone in alone to save him, the two were practically attached at the hip. the kid would follow gat around like a lost puppy, and the only person johnny spent more time with than violet was his girlfriend. then, once tanya was dead, he overhears a rumor that the supposedly mute kid could not only talk, but she would only speak to johnny or aisha. apparently gat had gone asking around if the kid had spoken to anyone else before him, and thats how everyone found out (gat was slightly offended when he found out violet spoke to aisha first, long before vi made that horrible hepatitis joke to him, and aisha had been keeping it a secret for her)

julius had never liked gat, he didnt care about ending the gang wars and was only there because he was bloodthirsty and lived for violence. and now he and the kid julius was becoming increasingly cautious of were feeding off of each others recklessness. not only were those two a volatile mix, but it seemed like julius was losing control of playa because of it… and that was bad news for him

johnnys sidelined, and banned from helping with any moves against the carnales and rollerz. julius told him it was because of his injury, which they both knew was a bullshit reason; hed been fucking up the vice kings just fine even with his messed up knee. gat did not take it well, and there was a shouting match that violet walked in on. vi was upset of course, her and gat were friends now and she liked running missions with him, but she wasnt going to argue. even if playa didnt understand julius’ decision, she didnt question him, but there was a lot of tension between johnny and julius after that, especially when it seemed like julius was actively trying to keep vi and johnny away from each other. anytime theyd hang out at the church, if julius saw them together you could feel the tension fill up the room, and more often than not hed just send violet out with some bullshit orders. the two quickly learned to hang out away from the church after that

by the time the carnales are history and theyre gunning for the rollerz, julius knows how badly he fucked up. thinking he could start a new gang, and control it? he was naive. theyd taken over almost all of stilwater, but at what cost? how much of the city had they destroyed along the way? and at the center of all that carnage was violet. the more of the city they take over because of her, the more disgusted she makes julius. he needed to stop the saints, stop her, but he has to do it carefully. if anyone realized it, or that he was trying to get playa killed, the gang would turn on him in an instant. the rest of the saints idolize playa, and they all know shes a big part of the reason for their success. if anything happened to julius, the gang would rally around violet, and he knows it

at first he was just sending her into risky situations because of the faith he had in her, but for a while now hed been sending her on straight up suicidal tasks on purpose, hoping someone would finally just take her out before she caused any more harm or became even more of a problem. but she just keeps coming back. doesnt matter if its just her against an entire stronghold of god knows how many seasoned gang members, shell walk out only a little worse for wear. julius starts to wonder just how terrifying this kid is, and all the while violet never even notices that julius is doing this, shes just doing what shes told. hes all praise whenever they speak, trying to keep her placated. troy notices the risks julius always seems to take with violet, but he just thinks julius is putting too much faith in the kid and driving her too hard. he starts trying to look after vi in his own ways to make up for it (thats how they become friends) but he never realizes julius’ true intentions until its far too late

vi and lin are flying solo now, with almost no help from the other lieutenants. julius makes it look like hes putting more faith in violet, no more kid gloves. of course vi and lin get in over their heads like that, and when lin gets killed and vi ends up in the hospital, julius wishes to god that she had just drowned in the river with lin

and then, soon after, its done. the vice kings, the carnales, the rollerz, theyre all a memory. the saints own the whole damn city, or whatevers left of it. and then julius gets arrested, and he finds out troy is a cop, and julius knows its all over…. but troy offers him a deal: get johnny and playa out, and he can walk. he gets the idea right there, to kill violet himself. theres no way shes going to stop, and julius knows it

violet knew driving over to the dock that she was walking into a trap, but if it was to get julius back, it didnt really matter. shed already murdered a major public figure and the chief of police trying to get him back, shooting her way out of another situation almost seemed pretty fuckin mild at that point. so it doesnt surprise her when hughes’ men surround her; no, what does surprise her is the sudden loud beeping, the confused look on hughes face, and something in her gut screaming at her to run. whether it was the wall of henchmen between her and the explosion, or the split second before the bomb went off that she used to rush forward and leap just over the railing that saved her life there, shes never sure. maybe it was both. either way, the burns scarring her back for the rest of her life show she didnt get off scot-free

five years later, and within 24 hours of waking up and breaking out of prison, shes already visited the police station and listened to the tapes. and once shes heard them, violet is seething. she did EVERYTHING for julius, became a murderer, risked her life, followed all his orders without question! and he took five years of her life away! tried to take all of it away! something in her just snaps, and she sets up the meeting with dex that same night

julius thought hed be meeting up with dex, but in truth he isnt surprised to see violet instead; hed been dreading the possibility of this day since he first learned that shed survived the explosion. but even so, even after what he did, it quickly becomes obvious that julius genuinely doesnt believe that violet will follow through with payback. and violet is livid, feels like somebody hollowed her insides out and theres nothing but anger under her skin anymore. despite everything he doesnt know her at all, still thinks shes this loyal little teenager who will do whatever shes told. a dog on a leash, because he never learned that she could be more than that, that she was more than that

and then, hearing him hold himself over her? violet knows who she is and whats she done, shes under no illusions about that. but hearing julius somehow think hes the good guy, that hes morally better than her after everything he did, everything he ordered her to do… it adds a whole new level of hatred. not to even mention how he tries to leverage saving her life over her again, after shed MORE than paid back that debt. thats the last straw, and she kills him. never regrets that choice for a single second for the rest of her life

after that, violets just… angry. shes like that for years. julius took everything good she ever had away from her, and every person she kills is another “fuck you” to his memory. gang member, cop, civilian, she doesnt care anymore. julius wanted to save the city from her? good. shell burn the whole fucking thing down just to spite him

she doesnt get over that for a long time

#JSDHGSFDG THIS TOOK ME SO LONG IM SO SORRY words are hard #man i love the 'trying to do the right thing in all the wrong ways' interpretation of julius....#b0one #asks #violet grey

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survivorbehemoth · 5 years ago

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Episode #9: “i hope that i'm out of the pickle and eating the... pickle” - Daisy

how i feel about merge: https://66.media.tumblr.com/68a1cf13a1ea5ca8ec0c6c8a044f92ad/fdb9160ed3342b6d-08/s500x750/a71a511c4f332aba10424d15b5e074bc9bbe5e0d.gifv

Click HERE to watch Szymon’s Video!

Click HERE to watch Daisy’s Video!

Click HERE to watch Chips’ Video!

Click HERE to listen to Szymon’s Vocaroo!

Click HERE to view Szymon’s Trust Rankings!

Click HERE to listen to Szymon’s Vocaroo!

Click HERE to watch Daisy’s Video!

Click HERE to watch Rob’s Video! Click HERE to watch another of Rob’s Videos!

So here is my i guess merge confessional! LOOK WHAT I DID! I MADE THE MERGE HEHEHEHEHEHEHE. Voting cindi out last round was very sad but very needed, i think she was looking to have fun and cause chaos but i need some stability in my life rn, crackhead seamus has not came out yet and he can’t yet LMAO. so what happened is as soon as we merged Szymon approached me and wanted to call, and pretty much went on a rant about how annoying Rob is and how everyones so far up his ass, and that HE HAS THE IDOL!!!! And that Szymon wants me daisy and jules to start working together which i was like OH I LIKE THIS. Going into merge i wanted to reconnect with rob, and then keep my alliances with daisy and gage and try and just use them as shields to get into deep merge and then start causing shit.

In terms of my thoughts on everyone…. Gage i am very torn about. Because he is the person i am closest to on a personal level but i think game wise he just is rlly desperate to not lose. I offered him a f2 on our last tribe which i do intend on keeping my word on, but then as soon as we merge i just felt kinda off about him? And he formed a new alliance with Szymon Rob and Conor and didnt say nothing to me or tried to include me. Szymon leaked it tho and so im like oh ok i see i see. I think he is trying to have his hand in everyones cookie jar, but knowing he wants everything is off putting from an ally stance. But also last night he opened up a bit with me and i think he genuinely does wanna work with me, just perhaps not with Daisy. so i am trying to figure out like what is the right move with Gage, is he someone who can actually commit? and will he defend me if people like rob or conor suggest voting me? idk, but i hope he would.

Daisy: my relationship with Daisy is really strong. I think we have a lot in common personally and game wise we mesh really well. Coming in from embb10 i wasnt sure how we would work together but so far so good. everyday she makes me laugh and i want to keep working with her. Supposedly people are painting us two as a duo but i also think if people targeted us they would choose Daisy over me at this point which means i can embrace and keep working with her however openly i wish. Daisy i think also wants to more so work with Szymon and Jules which is fine by me. I think us 3/4 can work really well, it’s just about finding the right time to possibly take a shot at someone.

Szymon: i wasnt sure how i felt about Szymon at the beginning. Sometimes i thought he was annoying, other times i just thought he was being himself which i sometimes just dont vibe with. But him being really honest about his opinions with people shows that he actually is someone i can work with. i am a blunt person and when others are willing to throw mud too, it means we can work well together. I think he is very eager to vote out Rob and also doesnt want to work with Gage which i’m not 100% sure what my plan is yet regarding both.

Rob: rob is a big threat but only because he is so blatantly talking to everyone. dont get me wrong Rob is a great guy, but he isn’t a great ally just because he talks to me. I also know that he has the idol and clearly I aint the top of his ally list since he didnt include me in the one with gage szymon and conor and he also didnt tell me about his idol. Also every inactive person talking to him is not good bc i dont want his farmer ass to let his sheep target me. I think Rob may go home very early and he wont even see it coming.

chips/brandan: we arent working together. that’s about it.

Conor: we became a bit closer during the swap but i certainly wouldnt say he is an ally. more like a neutral friend. i think conor plans on working with gage/rob/szymon. which doesnt include me. But i dont think he has many other connections such as with dylan or daisy or jules. so im not sure how much he’ll be doing anytime soon.

Lovelis: he seems pretty inactive. itll be interesting to see if i can use our pre-established friendship to kinda pull him in and work with him but i also dont know who he plans on working with or doing. very nice and everyone agrees when he is on he is fun to talk to, its just about activity levels and trying to see if he actually is here to play or not.

Dylan: I LIKE DYLAN. BUT HE ALSO LEFT ME ON READ FOR LIKE 16 HOURS NOW LMAO. He was super fun to talk to on our tribe game night, and then in pms but then he kinda ghosted me but continued to talk in the tribe chat. granted i got rlly sloppy drunk last night so when he was free to talk more i wasnt ;/ So ill be interested to see if we can keep vibing, im defnitely open to working with him bc he seems like he would be fun to strategize and work with, but we aren’t necessarily at that point yet.

Jules: juuuules!!!!! amazing, fantastic, the best. but also not the most active. im interested in working with her and i think she appreciates me being crazy and i appreciate her being crazy too. also she is the main reason i won this challenge SOOOOOO. I think me szymon and daisy have a great opportunity to work with her and form a tight 4 if thats the path we choose to go down. Jules is here for fun and to socialize with people and i think some people are off putted by that but i thinks its fine, i just hope we have fun doing crazy stuff together and not against one another :D

THATS IT! MY MERGE CAST ASSESSMENT.

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SO I WON IMMUNITY! HEHEHEHEHEHEHE WHICH IS KINDA EMBARRASING SINCE I ONLY ASKED 2 PEOPLE FOR THEIR WORDS, AND THEN DAISY/JULES/SZYMON GAVE ME THE REST. Honk honk i love sharing, this is what communism is all about! But being immune first is kinda a great thing because it really puts you in a firm spot and allows/forces people to strategize with you. since i am unsure if i can attend tribal/live night it also provides some much needed security early on. i am hoping chips goes home at this first tribal which seemingly everyone is on board with. And then id prefer brandan or lovelis to go in live night. But i think Szymon and Daisy will want to vote for Rob. I am not sure if i want to take that shot yet because it might hurt my chances of working with Gage, but also leaves several more inactive people in. if i was confident people like lovelis and brandan would follow rob out the door that would be one thing, but i think it would make people like conor/gage possibly start targeting szymon/daisy/myself and that isnt a good thing. especially if we can wait to f9, and have 5 directly on rob and he goes home and then theres less potential for us getting outvoted

Click HERE to watch Daisy’s Video!

Click HERE to watch Dylan G’s Video!

I know I have been sending only really text confessionals right now and I am REALLY sorry about that, since pretty much a lot of my life has FINALLY FUCKING CLEARED UP I can actually start doing them, butttt since I'm a procrastinator on all sense of the word I'm just gonna type something here and be done with it okay?

Anyways, MERRRRGGGEE! I am fucking SHOCKED that I have made it this far. Keep in mind I really don't think that I would have had any issues getting to the merge keep in mind. Other than the shit I was going through early game and then with some other stuff I feel relatively blessed to be here. I made some connections on my swapped tribe which helped me stay around, and then afterwards I pretty much like... I'm here! I wanted to try and win as many challenges as I could just to help me get by, but then again I'm not the most TALKATIVE person in the world so whatever, I'm planning on fixing that now.

ANYWAYS going into live night I am worried. I was playing three games at once including this WHILE working and BEFORE I got COVID so that was.... okay that wasn't really that fun but still WHATEVER I TRIED GURL OKAY? And from the looks of it the first round should be easy with a relative chips boot which I am fine with. The second round though? That's where the primary issue lies. The only name I heard relative to that is potentially lovealis which I am down with. I got Jules who is a Brandan STAN, my Coco loco alliance with daisy/szymon, and other connections I have made with people like rob. Since after Chips leaves we're in the Final 10 during live night that's easier for my mental sanity. and with me/daisy/szymon/rob/jules, that is already HALF the votes. So I feel... good.

I did not succeed at the social queen immunity.

A social queen i am not.

I was told the vote would be me... so I packed my bags.

Then... a LONG time later they want to blindside Rob. I say okay, I'm down knowing I trust no one so trying to hold on to my smallest sliver of hope that this isn't an elaborate lie.

Then we get live round! If I make it that far I'm ready to party!

Click HERE to watch Gage’s Video!

Click HERE to watch Rob’s Final Words

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Rob is voted out 6-3-1. He becomes the first member of our jury. We then have LIVE NIGHT! At live night, Lovelis goes home 9-1 and becomes the second member of our jury.

Watch the Cast Assessment for this Episode and last Episode below:

youtube

#episode #superspooky

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i-amusemyself · 8 years ago

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All Emoji Asks.

🐰 what is one secret youve never told anyone?I don't really have that many secrets. I guess theres a side of my personality that I spend a lot of energy supressing like hell that I hate with a passion.💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be?Right now? My best friend right next to me or my friend back home.🐹 what are some of your favourite pokemons and why?I mean, I only ever played pokemon go, but from that I loved the squirtles and the evees just bc theyre cute af🌠 if you were in charge of the world what would it be like?A lot more chilled out. Chill pills would be mandatory.👀 what was the most recent vivid dream you had?Okay I had two freaking weird ones the other night?In one I was a 10 y/o muslim girl going to a new primary school and while I was there I started raising money for a cancer charity.In the other I was taking a really hard A level maths exam and getting stressed and mad bc everyone kept talking and I couldnt finish it in time.☀ what do you like most about your best friend?EVERYTHING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Idk, I guess how forgiving and layed back she is. She always tries to understand and see things from your point of view.😘 talk about your crush or partnerLmao I'm alone 😂 I do have a crush but its a million miles from mutual so like, shes amazing but boi it hurts 😂💁 if someone was rude to you would you be rude back?Depends on how well I know them and what they're like tbh. I'll banter, but I avoid confrontation.🌟 what do you like about yourself? (3 things)😂😂😂 wow erm...1. I always try and put in all the energy I have if someone/something needs it2. I make loads of terrible puns its gr93. I really dont have any other qualities idk🐾 what are you scared of most? How will you overcome it?👏 I'm terrified of abandonment 👏 aaaand as of yet I have no idea how to deal with it ngl🎁 what never fails to make you happy?Really good stand up commedy or my favourite music💙 what annoys you about some people?Their complete lack of self-awareness. Idk, maybe I'm low key jealous too but srsly some people????😤 do you get angry easily?Yeah. I keep pretty good tabs on it so you probs wouldnt know it, but if something upsets me, chances are I'm hella pissed too.🐇 what do you always daydream about?Dramatic and upsetting situations or drunk situations 😂🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?1. Sort out equality and all that jazz2. Divide up the land more equally, bc it pisses me off that some people are living in tiny cramped shacks and others have 100 mile square farms.3. End capitalism and with that make all necessary services free.🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry?Anon?✈ what is your dream city and why?I mean Ive always wanted to go to copenhagen but theres no guarantee its gonna be my fave. My fave so far is Amsterdam bc its so peaceful and the architecture is to die for.☕ talk about your ideal day?Spend it with my best friend/crush. Lay in bed late and be lazy and watch good TV/movies. Maybe go out in the afternoon to not go stir crazy and entertain ourselves. Stay up kinda late talking about deep shit, lying underneath the stars.🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert?Ambivert!💧 when was the last time you cried?Yesterday lmao 😂 i havent gone more than 2 days without crying in the past week 😧 I just got myself into a nice Depression Episode.🎵 name 5 songs you like atm?Argh I havent listened to music in so long (7 days...) umm so things i wanna listen to- youth by daughter- voices by Motionless in white- living dead girl by rob zombie- corpse roads by keaton hensen- lost boy by troye sivan⚡ if you had any superpower what would it be and why?Mind reading bc my anxiety would be halved.💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say?I'd tell myself to stop trying to fit in and be like everybody else because the people I know are just a tiny portion of the population and really aren't much to aspire to. I'd tell myself to drop all my shitty friends because it would stop me from dealing with a lot of crap later on. I'd point myself in the right direction of the better people 😂I'd teach myself how to stand up for myself and how to not take any crap.And I'd give myself a hug and tell myself it's okay not to be cishet, because maybe if I could turn back time and start to deal with it earlier I'd be okay with it now.💚 who are you jealous of and why?A lot of people really, with qualities I don't have.I suppose one kid in particular is like, everything i want to be. Kind, hillarious, confident, close to people I love. 💎 what would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? Why?Bravery or kindness?? Its hard to have one without the other. Also beauty ngl bc im fugly.🙊 what are you ashamed of?My gender and sexuality 👏🌺 which languages do you know? Which do you want to learn?I know english and spanish and I'm learning Danish. Hopefully once I'm okay at danish I can learn arabic. Ill be satisfied after that 😂☘ if you could be any fictional characters friend/lover who would it be and why?I mean, theres plenty of fictional lesbians where im like 😏👀 but honestly if I had to pick only one person I'd choose Kieren Walker from in the flesh bc he needs a friend and I relate to him so strongly.☁ talk about your dream universe.Mental and physical illness doesnt exist. People arent dicks. Everything is free. No one feels unloveable.💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today?Idk I'm p much done for the day 😂 I've been helping out around the house all day tho🐬 if you could transform into any animal what would it be and why?I mean i might be biased but either a dog or a sloth bc they get to sleep all the time 😂🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike.Someone I was best friends with for 4 years suddenly turned around and stabbed me in the back, made up shit about me, arranged that all my friends not talk to me for a fortnight, sent group emails stuffed with emotional manipulation and blamed me for her suicidal thoughts. I nearly ended it. Now I get to watch my friends still loving her like she isn't the world's most heartless person. It makes my blood boil.😣 talk about something that has been making you depressed/angry/anxious.I'm staying with my best friend rn and I can't stand the thought of going home.🍪 what did you want to be as a kid and what do you want to be now?I wanted to be a nurse and now I wanna be a doctor 👏 variety 👏🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods?I cant really eat sugar 😂 so fuck knows? Chocolate?🍑 what are you obsessed with?Brains, thought processes, psychopaths, graveyards and more 😂💘 what happens to you when youre stressed?I just get really emotional and start agressively making lists everywhere in an attempt to sort my life out.😪 what are you sick of?Humanity.🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker?Yeah its terrible 😂 i hate anxiety but I also kinda love it when my heart races.💥 what are some unpopular opinions you have?I....dont? I cba with discourse lifes too short.☔ would you consider yourself a good person?I think anyone with good intentions is usually a good person so yeah😊 what do you do as hobbies?Sleep, binge watch netflix and blog 😂🎤 whats the last song you hummed or sang by yourself?👏👏👏 Mr Brightside 👏👏👏 what a jam 👏👏👏🐝 whats your worst trait?Being waaayyy too clingy.🌷 whats your mbti personality type and why do you think it suits you?ISFJ and yeah defo, its the defender and I feel that tbh🐶 send me 3 fictional people and ill choose my favourite.Anon?👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why?Kaitlyn Alexander is my bae.Besides that I dont really....obsess over any celebrities? Eliza taylor is doing p good 😂 ummm also some youtubers? Do they count?🐴 opinion on __?Its a great bit of punctuation.🍋 do you consider yourself to be an emotional person?Lmfaoooooo YES📚 share 3 books you love and your favourite quotes from them.M8. Thats not gonna happen 😂 I love any book that makes me cry but I cannot quote a single word.😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? Does it work?Find a quiet corner, shut my eyes and listen to my Depression Playlist. It doesn't always make me feel better but it helps me ride it out.🙂 what thoughts keep you going when you're sad?The thoughts of uni and that I'll hopefully meet some great new people. Also my best friend. Just in general 😂🌎 which country do you live in?England.🐧 describe yourself in 3 words?Awkward, tall and shy.🙉 what quotes changed you?"Pick your fights" bc as much as its a meme it helps me chill outAlso "everything is temporary" and "the sun will rise and we will try again".💭 do you keep a diary?I have a personal blog which acts as a diary yeah💫 who inspires you?Kaitlyn Alexander!! (Listen theyre like the first nb representation I ever knew and I relate so much to everything they say and theyre so cute and talented)👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?I mean, my initial response is no. Because we're just bags of flesh made up of cells and when we die those cells die so theres nothing to live on.But tbh we know so little about the universe I'm open to the possibility of anything at this point.🎀 whats your fashion sense like?Dior. I know what clothes I like and think look good but I never like them on me.🎬 what are some of your favourite films?Deadpool, My sisters keeper, pitch perfect 2 ermm🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory?UmmmmmmmmmmmmWhen I first got my bunny, that was an amazing day!!🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?Um my soulmate? Where are they at?

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