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medicalpoetess · 5 months ago

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#SOLO - An introduction to who I am

My neck. *waking up in some no tell motel in proverbial bumfuck America was not what or where I'd ever see myself waking up but here I am rubbing the kink in my neck in the hopes that it will ease enough for me to get up and get moving* Oh fuck me. *I shut my eyes with both hands rubbing my neck while I slowly rolled my head from one side to the other. When I stopped it was with a huff as my hands dropped to my lap and I actually looked around the small room I was staying in here in Deadwood, South Dakota* You are a world away from El Paso girl. *snorting a half laugh but I had my reasons for being here and for me they were damn good too. Diego. *saying his name or even simply thinking it had an image of his infectious smile flashing into my mind. When we'd met outside Providence Memorial Hospital it had been strictly by chance. I had stepped outside on my break from all the chaos of the Emergency Room and he was outside needing a break from the ICU where his mom was. We'd talked and helped each other deal with emotions we had kept locked inside. I'd taken it as simply a one time encounter but a little over a month later I was at Latin Groove Bar & Nightclub with a few of the girls from work when Diego and I ran into each other again.

Again it was fate putting us in the right place at the right time. This time we danced, had a few drinks, danced some more, and at the end of the night (or morning) we'd walked out together with him making sure I got in my Uber safely as well as him making sure he got my number. After I got back to my apartment my phone rang and it was Diego calling just to make sure I'd gotten home alright. That moment he signed his name on my heart. I'd never known anyone like him. Someone so thoughtful and caring. He was a true gentleman through and through. The night of our first official date I was walking on air as we went out to eat and a movie. I wanted to kiss him when he walked me to my door. He walked away then came back, sealing the night with a kiss that I'll never forget. From that night on we were inseparable and when he met my parents, Amina and Joaquin, they loved him as much as I did.

Days turned to months and he was my rock that supported me when my mother was killed when her car was t-boned by a drunk driver at an intersection. I was there to support him when his father got sick after grieving over the loss of his wife from cancer.

Months turned into years and we got engaged. I was so happy. We were planning something small and intimate. Just us with our friends and my dad there. The night of our engagement party the laughter and love that was shared filled my heart with glee. Little did I know that that same night would also be filled with horror. I was so blissfully unaware that I hadn't noticed some people at a table across the restaurant from us staring at us. My focus has solely been on those at my table and the memories being made and shared amongst us. At the end of the night, Diego and I were walking my dad to his truck when we were attacked from behind. The things that were happening came fast as my dad tried to shield Diego and I, telling D to love and protect me no matter what.

Then a shot rang out -- kapow -- or maybe it was more like a POP but whichever sound it made my dad's body reacted to it. I could see blood shooting from the wound in my dad's chest like a geyser then he slumped and fell. Blood pouring from the wound onto the pavement even as I tried to staunch the blood flow with my bare hands, begging my dad to stay with me. "Te amo bebé." My dad's hand covered mine as he whispered the words over and over until his hand slipped away leaving me to scream into the night sky just as another sound tore through the night. This one wasn't a scream but a howl that was followed by the sound of multiple growls. Then I feel Diego's body slamming into mine as a guttural scream was ripped from his throat but his screams weren't the only ones I heard. The ones who shot my dad were screaming too, but not just screaming they were pleading for their lives.

As I pushed to see what was happening my eyes went wide when I saw three wolves but these were bigger than any wolf in a zoo. These were gigantic. One turned its head towards me as its enormous paw laid on the shooter's throat like it was asking me if I wanted him dead.

All I could do was nod and when I did the wolf reacted, tearing into the man's throat and chest with teeth and claws until the wet sound of the shooter's heart bursting between those mighty jaws made me both want to throw up and cheer because he got what was coming to him. Then the wolf began its march towards Diego and I. I could feel D's body struggling to move in order to cover me then came the sound of sirens getting closer. The wolves growled before they ran off leaving me laying beneath D's body with his blood dripping onto my face and neck from wounds I couldn't see then there are shouts and Diego's body is lifted off mine. I can feel hands inspecting me for injuries but the voices are far away and I can't focus. Then I'm lifted and I'm greeted by the darkness that is looming at the edge of my vision.

When I wake later I am in the hospital. I'm alone. Terribly alone. Then a nurse walks in and steps out to tell someone that I'm awake before she walks back in to check my vitals* My dad? D... Diego? *Her eyes look at me sympathetically as she tells me that the officers will answer my questions. When the officers come in alongside a doctor they tell me that they are sorry but my dad died at the scene and when I ask about Diego they tell me that he is in the room next door* I want to see him. Please. *The look they share is a foreboding one but they nod and agree to let me see my beloved. In a matter of hours I am wheeled in a wheelchair into his room. The wounds though bandaged look like they are healing but at an alarmingly fast rate then the officers ask us for the events. Diego tells about the shooting and that some others arrived to attack our attackers catching him with whatever kind of weapons they were using as he covered me. He's not telling about the wolves and I tell the same story, omitting that the killers of our attackers were actual fucking wolves. I mean I was there and a part of me doesn't want to believe it myself. Wolves are pure fictional works of a story teller's mind --- right?!

A few days pass and we are both released but Diego is restless. He's himself but not at the same time and I can't figure out why. It's not until the next full moon that what's going on with my Diego becomes literally apparent. At first he's in terrible pain and then I hear bones breaking, followed by his screams of agony as his body begins the slow change from human to wolf. I press a fist to my lips to keep from screaming but the tears that are running down my cheeks tells how much seeing him in this kind of pain hurts me. Once the change has finally happened his now fur covered body stretches and there's a pained howl that comes from his elongated snout. His black nose is in the air sniffing and I let out a soft whimper. The sound makes the wolf jerk his head my way and growl as he begins stalking towards me with fangs bared*

Diego. It's me, baby. *the wolf's head snaps up like he remembers my voice then he whimpers and runs off, vaulting out of the open window as I run over to watch the wolf race off into the night with my heart feeling like it has been wrenched from my chest*

Please come back. *the fist on my mouth is now pressed to my chest both in the memory and in the real world as I remember it all like it was yesterday*

I'll find you, baby. *my bottom lip quivers as I talk to the room around me. I started this journey months ago, tracking the movements of my beloved from town to town. I don't know where he's going but I'll find him* Then what? *I ask myself as I finally get up and begin getting ready for my shft at the local hospital. I'd quit being an ER nurse and shifted into being a traveling nurse. Great cover for moving town to town and it paid well too. With each town comes more information and more questions along with the backroom whispers of a town in Red Lodge, Montana. I'd research later but for now I had a shift to do and money to make before moving on to wherever the sightings might lead*

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defenderofthespear · 1 year ago

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There was anger. Much anger. If he was free, he would have ripped John apart then and there due to the insolence. No one and truly, no one should have had the power to do this now. Perhaps many years ago, there were few that could, but it had been centuries since that time.

Perhaps he had become far too relaxed. Too content with how things were that the idea in general that someone who could combat him was not possible. Perhaps even unimaginable.

Unfortunately for Von'ar, he was on the receiving end of such a thing.

"Are you sure you even want the answer? I could tell you and I'd still find myself in the Pacific." It was a lose-lose situation at any-rate. No matter what he did, he'd find himself worse than he was before and yet... even still, he doubted that he could just use strength to get out of this one. "Can't get any worse than that, can't it?"

"At the least, I am getting a few good drinks and maybe tracking down a few idiots who've owed me money since America was still a colony," he says sharply. "At the most? I find information on an old friend of mine. A very old and dangerous friend."

There was no doubt the first and last mistake he’d ever make with John. A twist of fate or perhaps even Von’ar’s own arrogance. Such a situation that Von’ar knew he’d never repeat, but for now, he’d have to deal with it.

More importantly, Constantine would have to be dealt with. The only question was the when and how he’d go about such a matter.

Until then, Von’ar would have to make due with what he had - for, which happened to be splitting pain -mostly in his head- and the fact he couldn’t get up. Both of those were problematic and yet … he had no choice in the matter. He simply had to deal with it.

“You’re insufferable.” That was actually the lightest thing that he wanted to say, but he wasn’t going to attempt to speak through the pain. Not unless it was for a reason or to do something, that would obviously be in his power - when and if he got the chance.

“Idiotic,” Von’ar spat out, “the moment this weakens,” which he knew it would… eventually, “i’ll shove those cigarette‘s up your ass.” Among other things, but truly, that was one thing Von’ar could do. Tearing Constantine apart would come later -much later- and after he was long gone from this place.

#hxllblazer

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homosexuality-at-its-finest · 3 years ago

Note

Thanks for answering my last ask about the requests! 🥰

If possible I'd like to request something: male reader is Steve Roger's adopted son (adopted after he came back from being frozen lmao) and the reader is secretly dating Peter Parker!

I don't know if it's too specific or too complicated, but I was imagining something like: reader is like an avenger too. He doesn't have powers but has fighting skills and is a very sneaky and swift fighter much like Black Widow. He fights occasionally but his father is always hesitant on letting him participate in highly dangerous missions, he's very protective of his son. That would all just be like background information just give the story some base, but the plot itself i was thinking was just about Steve discovering his son is dating Peter - and, with that, discovering reader is gay - and he gets protective, possibly interrogates Peter and stuff like that. Obviously very fluffy at the end with everyone happy but I guess you can just work on it how you think it's best! If it's too vague or too complex I can try to rewrite the request if you'd like ☺️

Maybe Steve discovers that during a mission! I think that would be interesting - if you like it of course!

Plot: Requested

Pairing: Steve Rogers & Son reader + Peter Parker x Male reader

Y/n: Your name

N/n: Nickname

H/c: Hair color

Warnings: Fighting, cursing, blood, protective dad TM Steve, character injury, coming out, supportive Steve, adopted reader, fluff, slight angst, kinda Steve’s POV

Word count: 1236

Being the son of Steve Rodger’s, aka Captain America had never been an easy feat. He had adopted Y/n after he got out of the ice, needing someone to have in the complete mystery the world was to him. He immediately loved the spunky boy, who was outspoken and reminded him of his younger self.

On many occasions’ Y/n came home with bruises littering his body, but a boyish smile adorned on his lips. The boy just seemed to find trouble without even trying, so Steve decided to teach his son how to fight. It was quite a surprise when Y/n was a complete natural, able to take his father down after a few weeks of training.

The teenage boy’s confidence only seemed to grow with training and fighting, and much to Steve’s displeasure his son ended up joining the avengers. It was one of the only times the father and son argued, going from screaming at each other to the silent treatment for days.

Steve had to admit, his son could kick some serious ass, even beating Clint during a spar, leaving the assassin on the mat groaning in pain and eventually tapping out. Then came in Peter parker, in all his geeky glory, immediately drawing his son’s attention. Steve was hesitant about the boy; he didn’t want Peter causing more trouble for Y/n in the long run.

The father couldn’t deny that his son seemed happier when Peter came into his life, spending most of his time with the young genius and his friends. It was like a moth to a flame, Y/n gravitated towards the boy in a way Steve couldn’t place a word to. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think his son was enamored with Parker. He promptly reminded himself that his son wasn’t gay (There was no issue if he was though) Steve just assumed his son would tell him if that was the case.

That belief was completely changed on a mission though, Y/n and Peter accompanied the team, taking down one of the last HYDRA bases that was left. He had to admit that the kids were holding up well, he could see his son flying around, adorned in all black, including the black mechanical wings on his back. Y/n had made those himself, claiming that they needed more air support than just Tony, Rhodey and Sam.

Every time Steve watched Y/n fly around he felt his heart jump out of his chest, he knew his son could handle himself, but damn it, it was a paternal instinct. “How are we looking up there?” Steve called over the comms, watching as the three flying beings fought off any air support, and diving down to help when needed.

“Well pops judging by the fact that we’re all heading towards the ground for support I’d day good.” Came his sons sarcastic reply, and Steve had to hold back a small smirk. Usually, he’d reprimand someone for talking like that, but Y/n was a special case.

“N/n could you head my way, kinda getting swamped over here.” Parker’s high pitched and young voice rang through the comms, and Steve watched as his beloved son took off once more. He could hear the two young superhero’s grunting and making banter back and forth over the comms as the fight continued.

What took the captain off guard was the sound of his son crying out in pain and the panicked sound of Peter calling out “Y/n!” It felt like someone had grabbed his heart and ripped it out of his chest as he heard Peter call “We have an agent down! Y/n’s down!” Never in Steve’s many years of life did he move as fast as he was right now. Anyone who got in his was down before they could even raise their weapon.

When he saw Peter cradling Y/n against his chest, fingers brushing through his son’s H/c hair, the panic only worsened. The mask Y/n wore was ripped off, lying on the ground beside him; and Steve could clearly see the blood leaking from his son’s side.

As the super soldier got closer, he could hear Peter rambling quietly. “It’s okay baby, I know it hurts.” The teenagers voice sounded so broken; it made his chest tighten even more. “Your dads coming and then we’ll get you to med bay, you’ll be good as new.” He reassured Y/n. Steve couldn’t even bring himself to care when Peter leaned down and pressed a kiss to Y/n’s lips, giving the other boy a tight smile.

From there everything felt like a blur, Steve carried Y/n to the jet and next thing he knew his son was in recovery, a tired smile on his face as Steve entered the room. “Hey pops.” Y/n’s voice sounded so tired and strained, it made Steve want to break down and cry.

“Hey kiddo, how’re you feeling?” He questioned, sitting in the chair beside his son’s bed, immediately holding his hand. “Like I got shot twice.” Y/n deadpanned, giving his father a cheeky grin. Steve huffed out a tired laugh, eyes running over his son’s bruised body. “Yeah, yeah that makes sense.” The soldier chuckled lightly, giving Y/n’s hand a squeeze. The two sat in comfortable silence for a few moments, the only sound in the room was the rhythmic beeps of the heart monitor. After a few moments of psyching himself up, Steve spoke.

“So, you and Parker huh?” He kept his voice light, eyebrows furrowed slightly. His son’s cheeks flushed, looking away from his father. “Oh, uh yeah.” He could hear the beeping increase slightly. “Why didn’t you tell me kiddo?” He questioned, feeling a bit hurt that his son had kept something so important from him.

“I didn’t know how you’d react, being from the 40’s and all...” Y/n trailed off, eyebrows furrowed a bit. Steve felt his stomach twist a bit. Y/n was scared he wouldn’t accept him being gay? “Oh sweetheart, I don’t care if you’re gay, I love you no matter what, you’re still my baby boy.”

The smile Y/n gave him put the sun to shame, making a smile spread across his own lips. “How long have you and Peter been together?” He questioned lightly, his thumb brushing over the teenagers’ knuckles. “6 months.” Y/n replied shyly, flush darkening under his father’s questioning. That continued for about an hour before Peter entered the room, and immediately the protective dad mode came out.

“So, Parker what are your intentions with my son?” Y/n let out an indignant sound, slapping his dads’ arm. Peter’s entire face flushed bright red, looking like a deer caught in headlights. “T-to make him happy, sir.” Came Peter’s shy reply, glancing over at his boyfriend for help.

“Pops, seriously? Leave him alone.” Y/n gave his father an annoyed look, making Steve shrink back slightly, his kid was slightly terrifying, okay? The father watched as the two boys interacted, watching them for a few moments, before excusing himself from the room. If he came back later and the two were curled up in bed together asleep, well he wasn’t going to say anything.

#marvel #avengers #mcu #Steve rogers #Peter parker #steve rogers x reader #Steve rogers x male reader #Peter Parker x reader #Peter Parker x male reader #marvel x reader #marvel x male reader #avengers x reader #avengers x male reader #mcu x reader #mcu x male reader

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astro-rain · 4 years ago

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delicate; b.barnes

chapter one - “to wakanda”

delicate masterlist

word count: 1.5k

synopsis: reader works for what used to be shield as a highly skilled neuropsychologist. after the events in vienna involving the sokovia accords and a bombing, she gets an interesting request from friend and coworker sharon carter...a request involving none other than steve rogers and james barnes.

warnings: brief and indirect mentions of abuse/trauma

pairings: bucky x fem!reader

"I don't know Sharon. Are you sure I'm really the right person for this? I'm not, like, an Avengers level tech. Are you sure they don't want a genius or someone like Stark to do it?"

"Well, Stark is pretty busy right now, and honestly, no one knows psych like you. Not who I've met anyway."

"That is so not true. I'm willing to bet there's tons of other people you guys got somewhere who are ten times what I am."

"Agent (Y/L/N), in case you missed it, SHIELD isn't what it used to be. Sure we have old agents who aren't formally 'SHIELD agents,' anymore, but we don't have the expendability we used to. You're our best bet at the moment."

"Damn. I'm your best bet. I'm sorry," she almost chuckled, but then she thought for a brief moment. "Are you sure this is completely necessary? I mean, I saw the photo on the news. The quality's poor at best, and..."

She leaned in, discretely, and whispered.

"...not to seem like a conspiracy theorist commie or anything, but it kinda seems like people are jumping to conclusions here. Are we even sure it was Barnes who set off the bomb?"

Sharon looked around them, cautiously. No one seemed to be listening, but she scanned the room like her life as she knew it was hanging in the balance. She weighed her words in her head, making sure she picked the right ones, then formulated a response appropriate.

"Regardless of if it was him or not, Barnes still escaped. and before that, Ste-we'd been looking for him for almost two years. This analysis is necessary," Sharon brought her voice down even lower. "At least that's what I keep being told. Of course I'd like there to be more solid proof, but I'm not in charge here. He's gone, and they want to be able to find him and 'sort things out.'"

"'Sort things out,'" (Y/N) repeated, questioning the genuineness of whomever told Sharon that. "Unless they have hard evidence that it was him who set off the bomb in Vienna, shouldn't they leave that to uh...Captain America?"

She wondered how Barnes was able to escape in the first place. She saw the containment module he was in; there's no way he could've gotten out without a fight. ...But maybe it wasn't a fight. Perhaps it was a trigger word induced rage. (Y/N) understood a basic layout of the "Winter Soldier." SHIELD would've kept any information they had classified. However, after the fiasco in Washington, d.c. with Hydra and the whole releasing of all files predicament, she was able, with Sharon's help, to put together a simple outline. With that being said, he couldn't have broken out without going Winter Soldier mode. But doesn't someone need the trigger words for that?

“That's what a reasonable person would think, but once again, I'm not in charge," Sharon shrugged. "Things would probably be going a lot smoother if I was, but you can't have everything."

(Y/N) cracked a smile. Sharon was a friend, and a good one too. They'd known each other since before SHIELD was shattered in 2014. In fact, Sharon helped train her.

The only thing was: Sharon was a higher ranking agent and often withheld certain information from (Y/N). It frustrated her. This was where their personal boundaries got in the way of their professional ones.

She could tell there was something Sharon wasn't telling her, but she wasn't about to compromise either of their positions by pushing for information she wasn't supposed to know. Hell, maybe even Sharon knows something she isn't supposed to. Or maybe she knows something that Everett Ross wouldn't like. What if she was keeping something from him? Defying him? What if she was working with Steve Rogers? Now that would be interesting.

(Y/N) was used to secrets around her all the time. She knew Sharon had her fair share, and trying to figure them out wouldn't really get her anywhere.

"Right. Okay. Well, I'll get on this then. Thanks, Agent Carter," she teased in late response to Sharon's 'Agent (Y/N).’

Sharon offered a quick smile before walking off to attend to other business.

- - -

Pain. That was all it was. In every sense of the word. As she strenously made her way through the densely packed file of one James Buchanan Barnes, pain was all she could see. All she could read. It leaked out of the page and seeped into her skin like poison.

It was horrific what they did to him. She knew he had his memory wiped, had someone pull him out and stick someone else in. But it was more than just that. They took his past, his memories, his thoughts; and they ripped them from his mind, leaving an empty space to mold into their own. It was after this when Hydra, in every way they could, dehumanized him, made him less than. He was striped of his freedom, his control, his choice, his humanity, of everything that made him him. They beat and bruised and broke it out this empty human shell until he was nothing but a shadow of faded morality and consciousness.

But hell, she couldn't look away. She was glued to the aftershock of this horrible wreckage. All the years of studying Psychology and Neuroscience couldn't have possibly prepared her for the absolute horror that was his past, his abuse, his torture. It was heinous. Frankly, she questioned how he was still alive. How he still had the will and the drive to be alive. How do you live after that?

"Fuck," she breathed after eons of silence.

She seemed to lose her sense of time whilst she was immersed in the harrowing nightmare of Hydra's cruelty. 'Cruelty' doesn't even come close to doing it justice. When she came to, her desk looked like a bomb went off. Papers were bursting out of manilla folders, littering the linoleum surface with classified files and secret information. She leaned back in her chair, and gave herself a minute to debrief.

(Y/N) almost felt guilty, like she things she looked at were so vile, so violating that she didn't have the right to see them. Sure, she had read and analyzed all sorts of trauma and psychological profiles. But he was different. Something about James Barnes was different. It tangled her mind the fact that a person could endure all that. She could only imagine the effect that would have on the human brain. The possibilities are endless. Suddenly bombing the UN didn't seem so far fetched.

- - -

"Jesus Christ," (Y/N) murmured, staring at her office floor as Sharon finished explaining to her what happened at the Leipzig Halle Airport.

She sat mostly in silence as she pondered over the information just fed to her. Apparently Tony Stark gathered a 'team' to try and intercept Captain America - sorry - Steve Rogers and his (supposed) fugitive friend. It was chaos.

"What is this? Fuckin' Avengers Fight Night?" she wondered aloud. "How many people did you say were there?"

"Twelve total," Sharon clarified. "Five with Stark and five with Steve."

The psychologist shook her head, dumbfounded. "How did it end?"

"Steve and Barnes got out, but everyone else with them were captured and sent to the Raft."

"The Raft?!" (Y/N) exclaimed. "That's for, like, super humans! Not people like Sam Wilson or Clint Barton!"

"You're telling me."

Sharon seemed in agreement with everything she was saying. However, there was something she couldn't quite place. Like she was holding back. But holding back what?

"So what of Rogers and Barnes?" (Y/N) pushed.

Sharon got up and closed the office door before returning to her seat, leaning in, and lowering her voice. This secretive woman, god damn it.

"Well... That's what I came to talk to you about."

Oh boy. She didn't have a semblance of a single idea of what to expect. Apparently Sharon noticed.

"We're the only ones that know this. They're fine..." the agent trailed off, "They're in Wakanda, but they need a little help."

"Are you leaving?!" (Y/N) all but yelled before quickly slapping a hand over her mouth and uncovering it only to whisper, "Do you and Rogers have a thing or something? Cause' I don't know how else you would know all of this when I'm sure that no one else does considering he's now an enemy of several governments!"

"My relations with Steve Rogers are not the focus here." She could've sworn Sharon flushed. "But we have been in contact; I'm one of the few people he can trust right now, and I don't plan on letting him down anytime soon."

They totally have a thing.

"Noted," said (Y/N) with a nod, "but why are you telling me this? Does he want the profile analysis or something? I don't see how he would need it if he's known Barnes for however long."

"Not exactly..." Sharon fidgeted with her hands. "We need you to go to Wakanda.”

[A/N:] this is a repost of chapter 1 because my masterlist is being fucky

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ilove-cedricdiggory · 4 years ago

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Moony

Remus x Reader

Part 2

Summary - After you left Remus after telling him about your pregnancy, you're now trying to juggle being pregnant by yourself in a foreign country, along with your three best friends searching for you.

Trigger Warning - Cursing, mentions of abortion, angst, it's longish? I think that's all. Let me know if there's more though.

Italics are letters, Bold is unknown to the readers.

America.

That's the only way you can really describe it. It is, well, America. Some places are incredibly beautiful, some terribly ugly. Some incredibly cold, some unbearably hot. Some busier than Diagon Alley on the day all the kids come to buy their things, some slower than a virgin's bedroom.

You hadn't seen much, especially seeing as how you had only been there for a week, but it was already more than you expected. You expected a stern talking to, you expected a bed rest, you expected a midwife in every thirty minutes, and you definitely expected to have someone at your side every second of the day. But, that wasn't what you got.

Especially seeing as how, your Great Grandpa kicked the rest of your family out of the house before you arrived, not wanting his favorite grandkid to be in an uncomfortable home, especially while she was growing his two great, great grandkids.

He was incredibly wealthy, a pure blood from England gone American. You had been the only one that actively spoke to him and visited him as often as you could while he lived in England. Now, your family was watching the sand fall in his hourglass to see who got the most money from his will. Honestly, though, you could see the man living another 200 years - just to spite them all.

He had taken you out, shown you incredible things, although you were stuck in a stupid state of unbearable heat - Texas. Although, the heat had taken you out of the sweaters that had you crying every time you got a whiff of his scent, and into some beautiful maternity sun dresses. You had already sent 20 pictures to Molly.

You had yet to write to Lily though, but her owls came twice a day, at least. You were starting to worry that she would get on James' broom and follow the owl herself to find you. Her letters really all stayed the same.

Y/n, just tell me where you are. I won't tell Remus, or Sirius. Heck, I won't even tell James. Harry and I will come visit and I'll tell you all about how I beat Remus' arse. Or how James did....Or how Sirius did. But, please, just write me back. I love you. I miss you incredibly.

Then you had

Y/n, come on, you really have me worried. The entire order has heard about what happened and I think they're all freaking out each second like we are. We miss you. You're the ray of Hufflepuff joy we all need, the always Ravenclaw intelligence the boys really need, the absolute Gryffindor bravery in the craziest of situations that the order needs, and the Slytherin strength I need. Please, just write back.

Then, she got help from the boys - or, the ones you would be open to hear from.

Y/n, while I have to be honest, Lily is standing over my shoulder watching me write this, I was going to do it either way. Remus was an absolute arse, I understand that, but we miss you. Lily, Harry and I want nothing more than for you to be home, with us even. You don't have to see him, you really don't. We just want to be here for you through this time, the good and the bad. Please write back.

When that didn't work, you had a howler from Sirius.

Y/n Y/l/n, I swear, if you don't write me back, I'm gonna jump into the paper and send myself! I'm going absolutely crazy watching Lily freak out every day! You're the only one that can calm her, not even James is doing it! You're taking away my precious James time! I fucking miss you - okay? Moony is an absolute dick. He deserved you walking out on him, he really did, but please don't walk out on all of us too. Y/n, we miss you, we really do. Moony isn't even here anymore, he left after we all went to Molly's - Sirius, don't tell her that! - Shit, fuck, how do I scratch that? Uhhh, I didn't say that. Erase! Erase! Lily, how do I erase on a howler? Fuck. Whatever. I'm sure it erased. But, come home. I'll make James make you that surprisingly good chicken he makes and I'm sure Lily would love to give you some old baby momma clothes or whatever the fuck they're called. I just - we just - no, I miss you, okay? Come home.

Your heart broke, not just because Remus was missing, but because your friends were hurt.

You sat down at the table in your guest house, sighing softly. A quill and some parchment sat before you, your hand shaking as you dipped it into the ink.

Lily, James, and Sirius.

While I know I could write a letter to each of you separately, I'm almost positive you're all together, or you're gonna call each other as soon as you get my letter.

I'm okay, I think. Not as okay as I wish I was, I cry a lot. While I wish I could blame it on the hormones, I know it's not. Everything reminds me of him, even here. No, I'm not in England, I'm in the states. I'm staying with some family and I think it's doing me well. At least, I've started to own my pregnancy.

After what Remus said to me, my body broke. I just about hated the fact that I was pregnant. Not my kids, just that I was pregnant. But, with each day, I realize that this pregnancy is the thing I needed most. While I wish I didn't have to say this - it showed me the man Remus is. Does that mean I cry any less? Of course not - you guys know me.

But, I really don't think I can come home, at least not yet. I'm still trying to figure out what I'm to do. I love Remus with every fiber of my being, but how do you love a man that told you to get rid of your own children, the minute he gets home from a mission he could have died from? How do you let him hold you as he feels the two children you both created grow in your belly knowing he hates them?

I'm going to come home eventually, of course I am. And I already promised Molly I'll be back for a visit soon, and you guys are more than welcome to come visit once I teach my family how to properly floo in America - did you know they don't do that here? It's super weird. But, I love you three incredibly. I'm so sorry this has happened. Be safe.

Your heart broke as you debated on writing more, about what your heart was still set on. Remus. Where was he? Where did he go? Had they heard from him? Was he looking for you? But you couldn't bring yourself to ask them.

The owl was sent with their letter, leaving you in the silence once more.

How could you feel so absolutely alone when you had people wanting nothing more than to be with you? Is it what you thought you deserved? They were his friends before they were yours. You felt horrible that they were taking your side. You felt your heart ripping slowly with each beat it made in it's spot in your being. It was like one half of your heart was tied to Remus' and with each beat away from him, it tore you apart - slowly, filling you with excruciating pain.

Five minutes after the letter was sent, you were standing, trying to find a way to busy your mind.

Ten minutes after the letter was sent, you were crouching in the corner, the weight of your predicament pressing down on you so hard, it's like it formed hands and was set on pushing you six feet under without any hole dug for your body.

Twenty minutes after the letter was sent, your body was shaking with it's sobs once more, the loss of not only your spouse, but also the friends you loved almost as much as him.

An hour later, you had fallen asleep on the floor, your mind groggy and your heart tearing with each beat, your conscious hoping to pull you away from the pain your felt in the body that was supposed to be yours - but belonged to the man who seemed to not want you anymore.

It was dark, so incredibly dark. The only thing that was seen was the moon, halfway full in it's wake. The only thing heard was the pads of feet stomping on the ground as they ran. Ran where? Ran why? You could feel the pain in your chest, but it was like it wasn't your own. As you came to a stop, you looked at a building that seemed a familiar kind of unfamiliar - although that didn't really make much sense to you.

Before you realized it, you were slumped over the toilet, letting out the contents of your stomach. One of your hands pulled your hair to one side of your shoulder, keeping it there. But all you could think was how badly you wish it was Remus holding your hair, rubbing your back as he whispered sweet nothings in your ear.

But all that mattered today was to get through it, like any other day.

One day following the motions.

Two days following the motions.

Three, four, five days.

Until your hands were pulled from your face, the skin around your fingers almost chewed to nothing, the warm face of Lily standing before you.

"If I see you bite your fingers one more time, I'm going to hex them to taste like Harry's dirty diapers." She spoke, pulling you up from your spot on the couch.

"Lily - I." You stopped, looking around her to see James, Sirius, and Harry. "How?" You asked, looking back into the eyes of your best friend.

"Your great grandpa is super cool. I think he was getting tired of all the letters we were sending him too and gave us the floo network here to knock you out of whatever it is you're in." Sirius spoke, Harry on his shoulders, pulling at his hair.

"You guys-" You were cut off with Lily pulling you into her hold, her larger belly pressed against yours as you both attempted to properly hug one another.

"I have missed you, so much" Her voice was soft, uncommon for Lily. Her hands held you tightly, almost like she was holding onto you to make sure you didn't disappear once more.

"Come on Lils, other people missed her too." Sirius spoke to cause her to pull away and glare at the man. "If you weren't holding onto my kid, I'd have hexed you so hard for that." She said, moving to grab Harry from his shoulders as James wrapped you up in a hug himself.

"If we hadn't seen you for another day, I think Lily was going to fly off on my broom." He said, causing you to laugh at your own prediction.

You finally got to Sirius, his arms holding you tighter than the two. "I'm sorry." He mumbled, his hold growing tighter. "What are you sorry for, Siri?" You asked him, pulling away to look into his face.

"What he said, what he did. That's not what you deserved." He mumbled, pushing your hair back a bit. "I swear, I about pounded his face in at Molly's. I think Arthur had to separate me magically." He trailed off, looking at the floor.

His words brought tears to your eyes once more, your heart feeling empty, yet full. "That's not your fault, Sirius. We all knew he didn't want kids, but we weren't careful. I don't know why his reaction surprised me." You were honest with them, having thought this entire thing was truly your fault.

The three of them surrounded you, their eyes narrow with intent. "Y/n, the last thing this is, is your fault. You're his fiancée, not a random person. Either way, those are his kids. He shouldn't have treated you like he did." James spoke with meaning, wanting you to understand each word he spoke.

Somehow, the four of you relaxed enough to find yourself growing to bed. You showed Sirius his room, a place where James and Lily can lay Harry, and then their own room, before finding your way to your own.

You laid in bed, wide awake. You knew what tonight was, the night before the full moon, and knew that Remus was probably out wherever he was, already in pain. Every turn was different, it truly was, but each night before the full moon, his body ached, his bones almost softened, knowing they would be breaking and turning in 24 hours, and his head psyched him out, especially when you weren't there. This was now the third full moon your financé was to handle without you.

You refused to cry, knowing Lily always had a third sense to that stuff, and willed yourself to sleep. But, you laid there.

And laid there.

And laid there some more, until you couldn't handle the quiet, and found yourself moving out of the room and towards Sirius'.

You had slept with Sirius before, each time when Remus was gone and your heart could hardly handle it. Now, the three hearts inside of you couldn't stand the guilt of not being with him.

The door didn't creak when you opened it, none of the floor boards made a sound, but that somehow made it worse. Your feet carried you to the dark haired man, seeing his sleeping frame move, sensing another person there.

His eyes jerked open, coming to look at you as he smiled sadly. "How did I know you'd come in here. Just can't resist the charm, can you?" His voice was deeper, rougher from sleep. It calmed you, but never like Remus' did. You waddled closer to the man, his arms opening for you as you crawled into him.

You both laid in silence, but awake now, as you took in the moment.

"I miss him, Siri. I know I shouldn't, I know I should hate him, but my entire being misses him." Your voice was softer than his was, much softer, but it wasn't because you were afraid of him, but because you were afraid of your own truth.

"I know you do. I know he misses you too. You guys are kinda like Lily and James, meant to be. He's just, an absolute git for this." His fingers worked in your hair, rubbing your scalp and causing your eyes to close in comfort.

"I thought we were meant to be too. But, he doesn't want me anymore. He doesn't want us." At that, Sirius rested a hand at your bump, this being the first touch they really had beside your own. "He does, he's just stupid and scared. Either way, you have us. Aunt Lily, Uncle James, and, the absolute best uncle in the world, Uncle Siri. We've got you." His sensere words lulled you to sleep, a sleep where you felt safe and happy falling into.

You were running again, but it didn't feel like you were in danger. It felt like you were running to run, really. Which, was something you did not do. You weren't in the woods, but you didn't know where you were. All you did know is that you were still scared. Absolutely, bone crushingly scared.

With each step you took, the fear grew. How could you possibly be this scared? You were looking for something, but you didn't know what. You were shaking, but from both the cold and the fear. You were shaking. Shaking. Shaking

Shaking. "Y/n, wake up!" Sirius was looking down at you, his eyes full of excitement. "Your great grandpa is showing us the American version of Diagon Alley today!" You smiled up at him, nodding.

"Okay, okay, let me get changed."

The four of you had left your Grandpa once he settled himself down to play some wizards chess, waving you off.

"You know where the house is when you're done, I've got a title to keep."

You wandered through stores, showing them the few things you had learned so far about the wizarding world here. The four of you had just walked into their version of Flourish and Blotts when you were stopped by an older couple. "Oh, you both look absolutely wonderful! I remember when I was that pregnant. How far are you both?" she was smiling at you and Lily, growing closer to you.

"I'm due in about a week and a half. We already have one, Harry, who's staying with her family." She had pointed to you, smiling at the older woman. "Oh, I'd expect you to be due any day now. Seconds always come early and you look family dropped. What about you dear?" She had looked to you, glancing at your own belly.

"Oh, I'm only a few months along. Twins." You laughed, your hand resting protectively on your belly. "Awe, that's lovely. You both look radiant. Two amazing father's, I hope?" She now looked at James and Sirius, smiling at them. "Oh, no, I'm not the father. Our best mate is." Sirius spoke, gesturing to you. "Well, I dunno, is he?" He asked, looking at the three of you. "It's complicated." Lily said, smiling.

The older woman nodded, smiling. "I completely understand. I wish you both the best of luck." She bid you all adu, leaving with her husband.

"I can't tell if that was awkward or sweet." James laughed, leading you all to the door to leave.

You all laughed as you walked through the Wizarding space until you and Lily began complaining about the swollen ankles and bloated stomach enough to convince James and Sirius to guide you both home.

As the day turned into night, you now showing your friends the muggle artifacts your grandpa has collected from his move to the states. That was, until Lily groaned in pain.

"Fuck, she was right." The young woman grumbled, clenching her bump. "What do you mean?" James asked, his hand on her back softly. "He's coming early, James. I'm in labor, fuck." She groaned again, tilting her head back at the pain she was feeling for the second time in her life.

"Shit, Sirius, go find some towels. I'll go tell grandpa to write the healer for labor." You spoke, pointing Sirius in the direction of the towels before moving to Lily. "It'll be okay, okay? Everything will be fine." She nodded, gripping your hand tightly as she looked in your eyes. She smiled before groaning once more, a contraction hitting her. "Okay, okay, healer. You guys lay her down." Sirius returned with multiple towels, James and him laying a few out before helping Lily lay down on them.

You turned to waddle out of your home, attempting to get to your grandpa's house as quickly as possible.

Three steps towards his house, you heard a twig snap.

Five steps towards his house, you heard a thud.

Nine steps towards his house, a figure stopped before you, it's frame furry and bent, a growl releasing from his lips.

A werewolf.

How the fuck is a werewolf standing in front of you, in the middle of fucking Texas, in a populated muggle area?

You took a few steps backwards, until it clicked.

The only Werewolf that would spend his full moon looking for you was the same werewolf that has plagued your mind for the past month.

Moony.

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thatsgay-writes · 3 years ago

Text

Day 16

"Here they are, the brave young women whose tale of struggle and survival has gripped the nation." The host says as she sends the camera a smile. "The unsinkable nine, as we have come to know them. Ladies, you must have dreamed of coming home for so long. Now that you're here, what do you wanna do most?" She questions as she turns towards you and your friends. "Honestly, smoke about a hundred cigs, you know? Like, really rip through a carton or two." Dot starts as she leans forwards on the couch. The host gives her a slightly awkward smile, "Okay. How about the rest of you?"

"I don't know; Maybe hit up the OG for a never-ending pasta bowl and just... I don't know... Get back to our real lives." Toni says next followed by Nora. "I'd like to read the Odyssey again, rather than, like, live it." She jokes awkwardly, causing some of the girls to laugh in response. "Leah, what about you?" "Oh, um, I just wanna reconnect with certain people... People who may have been worried and-or felt like we had unfinished business. And if that person is watching right now, I just wanna say that I did not not miss you every day." You cringe at Leah's little monologue, still not feeling 100% about her after her fight with Shelby.

"My turn, Brooke, and I've got a nice, straight answer for you. I'm going to fuck the rowdiest guy with the biggest dick as soon as I fucking can." Fatin says, causing everyone to pause the fantasy you all shared and look at Fatin. Fatin turned to look at you, since you were at the end of the couch, and you couldn't contain your laugh. "Holy shit!" You belt out as you roll onto your side, "I don't think you can say that." You tell her after you finally catch your breathe. Fatin rolls her eyes, "Okay, make it more media-friendly. I am going to fornicate with the healthiest penis I can find ASAP." You let out a laugh at her newly formed answer.

After that, Dot changed her answer and Fatin got on Leah for her "emo shit show" answer and how Romeo's would be in everyone's DM's, before they finally started cheering over the fact that there was a chance to return home. "We're going home, bitches!" Martha yells as she holds up the bottle of vodka, causing all the other girls to cheer. You go to celebrate with them but notice how Shelby stays silent and slowly pulls away from the group. You watch her go, debating if you should follow her, as Toni helps you stand. Her face holds a large smile that slowly falls as she notices how distracted you are and that Shelby was walking away.

Ever since kissing Shelby, Toni had been confused on her feelings between the both of you. She had loved you for years but Shelby just had something so attracting about her. Unknown to her, you were having the same thoughts. "I'll, um... I'll be right back." You say as you pat Toni's hands that were still holding your own after helping you up. Toni just nods her head as you hop away after Shelby.

---

"You don't seem very excited..." You try and joke as you hop around the rock Shelby was sitting on, closing your mouth as soon as you see how sad she looks. You fidget nervously for a few seconds as Shelby doesn't respond to your presence. You let out a deep breathe before sitting down next to Shelby on the rock. "Are you okay?" You ask as you slowly reach out your hand to grabs hers. You move slowly so she has enough time to pull away but she doesn't. When you tangle your fingers with Shelby's, she finally reacts some and turns her head to look at you. She opens and closes her mouth a few times wanting to say something, but ultimately ends up closing it and shaking her head. You let out a sigh but nod your head. You lean forwards and cup one of her cheeks, giving her a quick kiss on the other one. Your face gains a small smile as you notice Shelby blush, "I'll leave you to your thoughts... If you ever need someone to vent to or a shoulder to lean on I'll be here." You tell her as you slowly stand up and start hopping back towards to other girls, missing how Shelby stared after you longingly.

---

As you get closer to the other girls, you smile as you hear them all laughing and joking around. "Oh, Martha, you're gonna be trippin motherfucking balls dude." You hear Fatin say as you finally reach the group and collapse next to Toni. Hopping around was not fun and you were going to need to find a walking stick or something soon. "And she won't be alone." Rachel says as she holds her hand out towards Fatin. Taking what looks to be a bag of gummy bears? You nudge Toni with your shoulder and send her a questioning look. "Martha ate edibles." She whispered to you before turning back to the group and reaching for the bag. You covered your mouth in shock and laughed at the fact that Martha, sweet and innocent Martha, ate edibles. "You want one y/n?" Toni asks as she holds one out towards you. You think about it for a second. Your doctors back at home would probably advise you not to get high but you had been feeling fine the past few days. "Why not." You answer as you take the gummy bear from Toni and pop it into your mouth.

---

"Marcus!?" You hear Martha yell out for the 5th time as almost everyone laid on the beach, high out of their minds. The only ones not laying down were Fatin, who looked like she was meditating, Shelby, who still hadn't returned from the rock, and you, who had taken a seat on Toni's back and kept tracing out random letters and shapes on her back. "I'm so fucking blissed out. Not even from the gummies, just from the thought that in 48 hours I can have an orgasm." Was the first thing Fatin had said in an hour, causing you to giggle and almost fall off of Toni's back. Unlike Toni, who always got more relaxed when she was high, you got more giggly, enthusiastic, and talkative. You being high rivaled Shelby's whole "Who wants to play an ice breaker?" persona.

"Wait? You haven't like self-induced?" Leah asks, seriously but still with a playful tone. "No, I can't do it with my hands actually. I have this weird cello-vibrato PTSD. It's a whole thing." Fatin responds, breezing over the subject. "So your electric toothbrush hasn't seen any action?" Dot asks causing you to laugh more and add on, "I mean we all kind of assumed." You send a wink Fatin's way before turning your attention back to Toni's back, effectively spacing out on the conversation.

When you do focus back onto everyone, it's from Toni tapping your thigh to get you to get up. "Huh?" "C'mon we're gonna go play in the water." Instead of standing up and hopping your way towards the ocean, you just roll of Toni's back and lay on your back in the sand. "I'm good... I think I'm just gonna lie here." Toni gives you a questioning look but you just push her thigh towards the water. "I'll be fineeeee, go have funnnnn." Toni rolls her eyes as you purposefully draw out words and follows the rest of the girls into the water.

You could hear the girls from where you laid, all of them letting out screams and laughs of joy. You would have joined but hopping around on one leg isn't fun and tired you out pretty quickly. You rolled onto your side once the sun felt too hot on your face and you noticed that Shelby hadn't joined in on the fun either. You contemplated going up to her and trying to talk to her or give her more space, but went with the first choice. If she had rejoined the group than maybe she would want some company now.

---

"Not a fan of the water?" You ask as you let yourself collapse next to Shelby, taking note how she now had the bottle of vodka and it had a less in it than it did before. "I... Um..." Shelby stuttered out as she purposefully did not make eye contact with you. "It's fine." You say with a shrug and lay on your side. "No need to talk, just relax." You say as you suddenly get hype fixated on making shapes and letters on her back. Missing the way she tensed up before finally relaxing. You spaced out again from what was going on, a common thing that happened when you were high.

---

The rest of the day blew by as everyone did their own thing. Nora and Rachel went off talked somewhere, you noticed that Toni and Shelby got into a argument, and you just chilled around with Fatin, Dot, and Leah, while Martha decided to adventure into the woods. "Guys! Guys! Guess what I just saw!?" Martha yells as she runs over the hill and back towards the group. "I just saw Marcus and he's alive!" She yells out, out of breath, causing everyone to laugh at how ridiculous she sounded. "No, guys, I'm being serious!" Martha defends and grabs the nearest person to her, Dot, and starts dragging her along. "C'mon, he's in the woods." Dot turns to give the group and exasperated look but you all decide to follow along.

You had your arm wrapped around Toni as you all journeyed through the woods. You had tried to get out of going, but Martha wanted everyone to go with her. "You're just saying that he, like, fucking pinocchio'd?" Dot asks, having not stopped laughing or joking about the situation since you all headed into the woods. "Yes. That is exactly what I am saying." Martha says in relief, missing that fact that Dot was still making fun of her. "He turned into a real boy." She finishes as you and Toni see Marcus... Who is still as fake as he was the day he was found. "I don't know, he kinda looks the same to me." Toni says as you release her arm so she can pick up Marcus. "Hey! My leg!" You say excitedly as you notice it laying under Marcus. When Fatin goes to kiss Marcus, you kiss your leg. It was all fun and games until Leah had to mention the fact that Marcus and your leg had been swept away but suddenly ended up in the middle of the forest. You had thought the same thing but hoped to just ignore that fact. "Leah. We're mellow. We're leaving."

---

"Oh Shelby, you love America so much. USA! USA!" Martha cheers, trying to get Shelby to join her but the other girl is completely zoned out. "Is she okay?" You and Toni ask at the same time. Both of you sharing an awkward look with each other, neither of you had told the other about your own kiss with Shelby. Luckily, Fatin isn't stuck in an unknown love triangle and walks over to Shelby. You all watch as Shelby starts to brush her hair, it seems to stay tangled no matter what she does. Until the brush gets stuck in her hair. Fatin attempts to help her but Shelby goes into full freak out mode. "It's all ruined." She says as she grabs the scissors out of Fatin's bag. Fatin attempts to stop her but Shelby was inconsolable.

"I don't' fucking want it! I don't want it!"

#the wilds #the wilds x reader #shoni #shoni x reader #toni x reader #shelby x reader #toni shalifoe x shelby goodkind #toni x shelby #toni shalifoe x reader #shelby goodkind x reader

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hetalia-has-a-secretary · 4 years ago

Note

Imagine a scenario, where the country representative develops romantic feelings towards their soldier, who 100% loves them back, but thinks about it as "I-its just a patriotic love, r-right??" And what's worse, it's a wartime, and the soldier is so loyal, that they're willing to die for their country with no regrets like a hero, without realizing how much it might hurt representative's heart. Even though the victory is extremely needed, (c/n) can't leave their soldier to sacrifice themselves, but they can't be together all the time either (cuz soldier is a mortal human, and country.. is a country). Note that they probably won't confess to each other until the war ends. (Or until some dramatic event, if you choose an angsty route)

So.. what do you think about it? I'd ask you to make axis&allies hcs on this, but I think it's a way too much xD You may choose any of countries you like to explore this~

This sat in drafts too long. I apologize for getting caught up in the Headcannons so much that I'd didn't do the exact thing you asked for... (I have a habit of doing this and I'm extremely sorry) but if the countries heard news that their soldier was injured they'd all 100% fight to get to them. I also changed the scenerios up a little For each country because it just fit better for the Headcannons. I.E I had a scenerio in my head, and it leaked all over the ask :3

Trigger warnings: Blood, mentions of violence, and amputations, minor mentions of alcohol. (If I missed anything let me know!)

Allies and Axis x Treasured!Soldier: Battle Scares.

Allies:

America:

The amount of panic set in was unbearable.

It was bad enough he had to painfully separate himself from England, but to hear news that he might lose his best soldier?

No, they were more than that, but he was so busy with the war he forgotten all but how he truly felt.

Even more so, he had to distance himself because a country and a human love was (at this time) unheard of.

He tried but seeing them laying on a dirty table, whiskey in hand to numb the pain, that was the final straw.

Running over and fighting past the nurses and doctors he stood at their side, caressing their face.

"Sir? Why are you here. I can still hear the gunfire. They're closing in on us..."

The soldier's illusions did nothing to stop Alfred from spilling his emotions to a mostly drunk, and badly injured human.

The worst pain came from the lack of response, and being pulled away from their table side.

Back at the main base of operations he was too distracted to be drinking over a victory.

To him, it was still worth the freedom, but not worth the loss.

Then it burned him at how many others felt this pain.

His head spun from the alcohol, but not being fully drunk, he was hyper aware of the whole place that had gone silent.

Looking around for the cause of the broken happy atmosphere he spotted his beloved soldier, crutches under each arm, and missing a leg.

Yet they still gave him the biggest smile.

"Was I not invited to the celebration?"

England:

"Too soon" he thought, no he begged to whatever cruel god would allow this to happen. How his soldier became cannon fodder was beyond him, but he's going to best the life out whatever general allowed them to go the first wave of attack.

Not only were they badly injured, but they were still somewhere in enemy territory. The other soldiers couldn't find his top combatant, but England is.

He was gone for hours, even if he found them dead, bleeding out, or worse they would be found.

Meanwhile the rest of his army grew sick with either guilt, or shame for not trying harder.

Back out on the field, underneath fallen trees and broken up rocks laid his gem.

His gem. He tried to avoid it. Tried to sweat it off as admiration, but it was to no avail.

Heart sinking, he screamed and hollered as he dug out the fallen soldier from the rubble and debris.

Soft groans made his heart flip as his treasured soldier shifted.

"shh, shh, shh, shhh- do not move love."

He tried to quiet them, but what they said next surprised him.

"Love, huh? I can't tell you how long I've wanted to hear you call me that..."

Blush across both faces, they made it back to base.

Since then his feelings towards them had grown, and he had them the new general of his army, that way they were able to stay as close as possible.

France:

This was the worst case scenario.

Everyone was celebrating in the mess hall, the final victory was won, but something was off.

When he realized his top soldier was MIA from the party his face paled. Panic setting in, he rushed around and questioned everyone.

How where they not accounted for? His heart ached and body was shaking viciously as he went to check their room.

Nothing. His soldier was nowhere to be found.

Tonight was the night he was planning on flooding a private room with his feelings towards them. But now...

Then it dawned on him to check the infirmary. He almost regretted it.

Sat up right, bandage on their side they sat. Alone.

He rushed over asking a thousand questions. Why, how, what.

He was surprised and utterly ticked off when they told him they had hidden their wounds, and had fixed themselves up.

He still had someone check them over, just in case. Despite their proper knowledge of these kind of wounds.

He wanted to say it. How heavy they made his to give feel, and how fast his heart would beat.

But he refused to cause any more strain to them. For now, they drank and ate in private. Plans of a new tomorrow giving them both reassuring hope.

China:

He froze, the enemies retreating.

All around him his men cheered but his heart lumped up in his throat as he darted over to a figure a few feet away.

The battle was exhausting, and a good handful of his calvary had fallen. Including his soldier, and close friend.

They had given a shrill shriek moments before the battle was won, and China couldn't see where they were through the fighting. Not until the enemy cleared way did he see them on their knees. A blade embedded in their back.

Once he rushed over the others followers through and it was a team effort to get them somewhere safe to examine them.

He was now under the assumption that his fighter was not going to make it to sun rise.

But he did not leave their side. He was not going to let them die alone, and though they faded out of consciousness, he took his time filling their ears with his confession.

Chokes and tears filling his eyes he laid his head and slept.

Then morning came. He stirred but refused to look up at the body that rested before him.

That is until he heard a faint snore.

His face flushed and he sprung up, almost missing the fact their hand had made it's way into his. A silent acceptance of his feelings.

Russia:

The blood spilled from the enemies as he easily cut open into everyone of them. His anger raging inside him.

Part of him recognized his blood lust, the rest of him not understanding why.

The only thing that gave away to his true feelings was the tears that tricked down as soon as he saw his soldier staining the snow with their own blood.

Moments and blinding rage passed quickly as he stayed worldless, carrying his favored human to the closest infirmary.

He sat by their side as the nurses and doctors worked at them. Refusing to move, and dare they fail him, punishment would be considered.

Dark violet eyes hummed with regret, hatred, and sadness.

If anyone had stared long enough they would see the broken breaths he had, the only sign of his inner emotions.

He did not want to lose something- someone so precious to him. To be left alone and so quickly after building trust between them was more than he could bare.

The gasps and coughing of his soldier stirred him, and he rose from his chair.

They coughed up blood, and cussed. Eventually they gave Russia the news that they had been unconscious, but not too badly hurt, but complete recovery would take time.

He nodded and thanked them for their work and left. The only sighs of his true affection was the rich delicious food and paper flowers that would show their way to the soldier's room.

Yet the war wasn't done yet, so Russia had plenty of time to figure out his own feelings, and hoped that his soldier would help him with that.

Axis:

Germany:

Hands dug into the fabric on his knees. He was side by side with his soldier, yet somehow some stray debris had found its way into their arm, almost severing it.

He was also injured, but not as badly. His knee was scrapped up but that pain was nothing as he was forced to watch his top soldier squirm and writhe in pain as their arm was... Taken.

He wasn't allowed past the curtains, his own wounds needing to be addressed.

The only comfort he could offer was his words of pride, and praises for their courage. He knew it wasn't enough to help them as the screaming stopped, and he felt a creeping fear grow stronger. Concern over their life taking over.

Moments went by, and he was finally allowed up, so he waltz right past the curtains and stood beside their linen bed.

Grabbing a washcloth and water, he softly cleaned up what was left of the blood, both on the bedding, and on the outskirts of their less brutal wounds.

He would take care of them when the others couldn't. He would be the reason they would recover, he had to be.

The day they fully came too, they requested to see him specifically.

It was Germany who was in shock of their confession.

"I needed to get it off my chest, guess that meant the arm had to go too..."

They laughed and he almost choked on his tears as they asked for a hug. He obliged.

From there on out Germany kept his own promise to make sure their life was worth living for. With or without mutual feelings.

Japan:

He's never touched anyone before. But this was a dire situation. His general, and most valued fighter, had been struck down by the cares, and was bleeding badly.

Japan had managed to fight off the enemies ambush, and was ripping sleeves and excess fabrics to stop the blood flow. The sounds of his close friend echoing through the trees shook his core.

He struggled carrying him to a medic, and his concern never waivered.

He almost walked away, unable to handle their screams as their wounds were treated.

He decided to tough through it anyway.

In that time he reflected over the situation, and he didn't realize the tears that had fallen. He wiped them away as best as he could. But the memory of their skin against his hand had set forth an unfamiliar urge.

It wasn't anything romantic, but the desire to protect them had increased, and it took him weeks after they started healing to come to his senses and admit his feelings.

The air was silent, and if felt stale. What was being asked felt almost forbidden.

Almost.

Italy:

White flags, after all, were just white flags. And some enemies did not take treaties lightly.

With Italy being under control of another country, his own army had suffered greatly. His heart weighing heavier with each loss, or vanished person.

But the one that hurt the most was a soldier he had praised time, and time again for risking their lives when he,.or the others couldn't.

A few scratches here and there were almost normal, but one day they had returned badly wounded.

Italy felt a surge of panic and fear as he ordered anyone to help treat their wounds.

His guilt for not staying closer grew with each passing second. He grew depressed as days went by. His soldier not arousing from their slumber.

Then one day they were gone. Confusion and hurt swelled within him.

He was close to just accepting the fact he just lost someone he had come to love, and almost openly.

He grew more fond of all the rejected passes and flirtatious remarks he gave his soldier. It was a little cat and mouse game for them both. But you can only play with fire for so long.

Then the door to their safe space swung open. His dear soldier at the door way, an enemy map in hand, blood on their shirt, and a smug grin in their face.

They had successfully infiltrated enemy lines, and came back with an advantage.

Italy wasted no time holding them, regardless of the others, and whispered his love to their ears. His solider promising to submit to his past affections and remarks as soon as they have more time to breathe and rest.

Yeah- y'all thought I wasn't going to get this sappy. Y'all thought wrong~ (just kidding I got super sucked up in this prompt I don't think I answered it correctly but ya know what. The sappiness stays!). Ignore literally any and all inaccuracies Because I know nothing about history or how armies work. These scenerios are purely created to fit the prompt and my style of writing so... There.

#hetalia #hetalia american #hetalia england #hetalia france #hetalia china #hetalia russia #hetalia germany #hetalia japan #hetalia italy #hetalia world stars #aph #AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #tw blood #tw violence

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legobiwan · 5 years ago

Note

Despite your (justified) criticism of them, I'd like to hear your favourite positives about Qui Gon and the Jedi

Absolutely!

And as an introduction, yes, I love to pull on the threads of things to watch them unravel and then follow those tangled paths to their conclusions. (The fun in this is exploring the possibilities and the whys and wherefores.) The Jedi institution and the Jedi therein were flawed and those flaws were exploited - to a catastrophic degree by Sidious but also by others along the way, which created a network of fascinating causes and effects that I just find endlessly fun to explore. The Jedi were slow to change, too immersed in tradition, aware of their shortcomings but seemingly unable to do anything about it.1 This being said, their ideals, their basic philosophies of nonattachment, of duty, of their place in the galaxy - those were solid, if not wholly attainable by any sentient. (”Seekers, not saints,” as the saying might go.) At the end of the day, I consider myself a staunch Jedi apologist, even if I will first run them through the wringer before I get to that point.

But anyway -

Qui-gon

My favorite problematic Jedi.

I think this quote from Master and Apprentice is very illustrative:

And this, I think, is the true embodiment of Qui-gon Jinn. He doesn’t negate the fact the darkness will always exist, that terrible things and people will inhabit the galaxy. But he emphasizes (to Rael, who is a bit more nihilistic about the Code and life at that point) he turns to the Light not because of the Jedi, or Yoda, or the Code - but because it is the right thing to do.

It actually reminds me a lot of this quote that’s been going around irl2:

And it’s true. Turning to the Light will not win you any points. This isn’t a game or a sports event, and in the true sense of balance, there is no real victor in the end. You can choose the dark and it will always be there to balance the Light because there is no Light without Dark and vice versa. But does one want to live their life in the shadows or attempt to create something better, even if it is a Sisyphean task, in a chaotic and unruly universe? Qui-gon - for all his foibles and occasionally terrible execution - lives by this, sometimes in spite of the Jedi as an institution. And I admire that about him.

And it’s this type of mindset, that sees the Light as something beyond the Code, beyond the Jedi as an institution, that makes Qui-gon such an effective “maverick.” I love his reasoning for training Padawans away from Coruscant:

This is so good, such a fantastic idea, and it makes me yearn for an AU Council where Qui-gon did take the seat (and then Rael could have finished Obi-wan’s training which would have been hilarious). The Council needed someone like Qui-gon who would challenge them at every turn, who would not accept the answers of “status quo” and “tradition” as acceptable. (And we all know from whom Qui-gon inherited this tendency, although Dooku was trying too hard to be an exemplary Jedi to be able to be the maverick either Rael or Qui-gon turned out to be. Which mirrors...someone else I could talk about.)

Qui-gon questions, constantly, and if he had lived past TPM, he would have likely been a thorn in Palpatine’s side because he would have raised issues like this:

The Council needed a strong, dissenting voice, and Qui-gon would have been it.

Even beyond this, however, Qui-gon cares. He subverts certain Jedi morals (and probably Republic law) to free Anakin. (And guess who, many years later, subverted Republic law in several attempts to do good, attempts that came so close to unveiling Sidious. Yes, I’m talking about Obi-wan, if you were wondering.) He refuses to sign the treaty with Czerka because it will enslave Pijal for eternity. His ideals are not bound by a (the) Code, by his place in an Order, but by something deeper, by a moral imperative to do the right thing.

(And also, without Qui-gon, would we have had Force ghosts?)

We can learn a lot from Qui-gon, even if (as I said) his execution of his ideals left some bodies in its wake.

The Jedi

One of the things I love about the Jedi is their approach to attachment. And I’m always reminded of this T.S. Eliot quote I got from a horoscope 10 years ago in a local alt-weekly paper that I ripped out and have carried with me since:

“We die to each other daily. What we know of other people is only our memory of the moments during which we knew them. And they have changed since then.“

Everything in this universe is fluid and in my mind, out society places far too much importance on a linear trajectory, on this cause-and-effect growth of “this is who you were and this is where you will be according to our metrics.” People change. Goals change. Life happens. Friends, lovers, strangers - they flirt in and out of our lives, always impactful, but never forever. And therefore, attachment - a form of control, a way of executing a will on an unknowable and recalcitrant universe - tends to be detrimental. And this isn’t to say that one should be without meaning and maintain some form of attachment to people and ideals and identities. But it’s a matter of managing that. Which is...not easy for anyone.3

I love the alternate Jedi Code.

Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet the Force.

It acknowledges that we will feel, will experience all these emotions and stimuli, but we can work on observing our reactions, and then watching them fly away.

And in a lot of cases, this is good. We need to be able to observe our own reactions, as if in a scientific experiment. I experience this, but it doesn't not define me, is a great way to deal with adverse circumstances.4

Taken to an extreme, however, and things get a little dicey.

The Jedi wanted to do good, hell, they even allowed themselves to be policed by the Republic to show their non-intrusive intentions to the populace. And a bunch of psychic space monks can be a little scary - let the holomedia get a hold of that narrative and things could go downhill real fast.

Mace wanted to see justice. Yoda wanted to see peace. Obi-wan wanted to see order. Anakin wanted to see love. None of this is bad, none of this necessarily conflicts with the Code. The Jedi believed all life connected through the Force, and it’s kind of beautiful, in a The Good Place-type of way that, I think, gives some real optimism to our whole sentient existence on this floating rock. And the Jedi, they give up everything, even if it isn’t necessarily by choice, to devote themselves to a higher ideal, to - at its core - helping. To - as the Qui-gon quote references - a greater good and the defense of that greater good in spite of everything.

In the end, I feel like it was really a matter of ideals vs. institutions. Jedi ideals are wonderful. Jedi institutions, like any, have their own inherent difficulties.The Jedi. as a whole. were doing their best to stick to their ideals in a non-ideal situation. Traditional culture versus ideals, however, is a whole other story.

1 this is very connected to my feelings about the classical music industry which are complicated and deep

2 uhhh, you paying attention, America?

3 I think this is where Dooku’s inherent nihilism came into play. And there’s no easy answer to any of this. Also, life is weird, you guys.

4 This is literally how I managed a very severe phobia of flying. Had to cleave the connection between fear I am going to die now and being in a plane. Which is hilarious, because prior to COVID, I was flying A LOT.

#Anonymous #hello there #ask legobiwan #qui gon jinn #the jedi #and now #time to go running #back later tumblr

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black-is-beautiful18 · 5 years ago

Text

Stone Cold-1

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Black!OC

Warnings: lying

*****************

"I don't know about this guys. She's not really my type." Steve mumbles hoping that his friends will see his discomfort. Bucky and Sam had somehow convinced him to join this dating app, and now he has a date with a woman named Delilah. She was a beautiful woman with brunette hair and brown eyes. She had a beautiful smile and she also had an interest in art like he did, but Steve couldn't shake the feeling thay something wasn't right.

Patting him on the back, Bucky chuckles." It's not like she a monster or something Stevie. Just give her a chance." He says plopping down on the couch next to Sam who pushes him before moving over. Rolling his eyes, Steve begins pacing." That's easy for you to say. You don't have to go on this stupid date."

"What's this I hear about a date?" Natasha asks smirking as she walks into the living room causing Steve to groan as Sam and Bucky explain what's going on." Aww. You should give her a chance." Natasha says smiling softly as Steve grabs his jacket." I may as well. I promised her that I'd take her to the art musem."

"Well go get her tiger." Nat teases bringing a small smile to Steve's face." Wish me luck." He mutters heading to the elevator.

"Have fun!"

"Good luck!"

"Don't lay it on her all at once!"

Steve chuckles shaking his head as he steps into the elevator waving to his three friends before the doors close allowing him to take a moment to compose himself. Tony was letting him take one of his cars, so he might as we'll take advantage of it.

********************

"Oh wow! I wonder how they got this." Delilah says in awe as she and Steve look at a portrait of Perseus beheading a sleeping Medusa." That must be Athena. Look at how it shows how she's instructing him to look into the shield, and look at Hermes' sandals!" She says excitedly causing Steve to smile sheepishly." I've never really heard the story." He says causing Delilah to gasp." Really?" He nods." Oh wow. Well long story short Perseus needs Medusa's head to save a woman named Andromeda from this sea monster. I can't exactly remember why the monster was going to eat her, but just know Perseus was the hero of the story." Steve chuckles and nods." Gotcha."

It turned out that Steve was enjoying this date far more than he thought he was. Delilah was a great conversationalist and she knew a lot about the art here which he found helpful at times. As they admired the different pieces of art Steve would often feel her eyes on him which he didn't mind. However, when it was time to leave he got very nervous. Delilah had suddenly become much more flirty and clingy.

"Um, s-so did you have a favorite part of museum you liked?" He would ask looking down at her as they would walk back to the car." I really enjoyed the Greek exhibit, but I enjoyed you even more." She says giving him a sultry look. Steve gulps and clears his throat." Why thank you. I enjoyed you too, but I should be honest. You're a lovely woman and you're beautiful, but I don't think I'd be interested in pursuing a relationship with you."

Immediately, Delilah's body demeanor changes. Her body tense and a frown on her face." W-what? I thought we were getting along so well. I even wore something special underneath just for you." She says pouting as she presses her body against his. Steve blushes and chuckles nervously as he backs up causing her to fall forward. She yelps as she falls to her knees causing Steve to wince.

"I'm so sorry. Let me help you." As Steve moves to help her up but jumps back as she lets out a scream." Get away from me! Don't touch me!" Delilah yells in a panic as she quickly moves away from him." I'm trying to help you!" "Somebody help me!" She cries out before letting out a sob. Putting his hands up, Steve backs away from her." I-im sorry. I gotta go." He says quickly before running like hell to the car. Once in the safety of the car he runs his fingers through his hair." What the hell just happened?!" He asks himself distraught.

******************

Steve grunts as he's shoved into a wall by a woman with red braids." Who are you?!" She glares up at him." Shut up! I'll ask the questions." She says firmly as two more women appear from the darkness. One with green braids and the other with blue braids." OMG! That's Captain America!" Euryale exclaims practically vibrating with energy." What?!" Her sisters demand looking at her.

Steve uses this distraction to break away from the woman before he takes off. He was going to leave, but he needed time to process what just happened. That's when the door was practically ripped off and he was dragged out of the car. He was then chased down in the parking garage. He has no idea how She was able to keep up with him. When she caught him she was anything but gentle.

"After him!" Stheno growls before taking off after him. Medusa and Euryale share a look coming to some nonverbal agreement before running after their sister both of them having sensed that something isn't right here. Why would Captain America hurt a woman?

Meanwhile, Stheno pounces on Steve sending both of them to the ground. With unbelievable speed she pins him down before raising her right hand exposing the bronze claws on her fingers. As she's about to bring her hand down to strike Steve she's suddenly pulled off of him." Stheno! No!" Medusa shouts as Euryale restrains her." What are you doing?!" Stheno demands angrily." You said this hunt was mine!" Medusa rolls her eyes at her older sister." Oh relax. This hunt may be a mistake."

Sitting up, Steve looks at them in a mix of surprise and confusion. These women, now that he got a proper look at them, were gorgeous." Who are you?" He asks cautiously as he stands not chancing letting his guard down. Euryale looks at him in awe as she lets go of her sister who looks angry and confused." We're sorry about that. We got a fake call." "A fake call?" Stheno demands as she stand dusting herself off." What in Hades name are you talking about?" She growls.

Medusa sighs." Oh dear sister. Did you take the time to smell him before you attacked?" Stheno looks between her sisters unsure, her confusion just growing." Um...no." "Exactly. If you did, you'd know that he's innocent. There's not a trace of lust on him. It was a false call." Stheno stalks over to Steve who backs up only for her to grab him by his shirt pulling him back to her.

"That's impossible." She mumbles before taking in his scent her grip and eyes softening." Oh my gods...it was a fake call." Stheno whispers in shock. She and her sister have spent years punishing those that would dare to hurt women in anyway. They've had fake calls before, but it had never gotten this far before." I'm so sorry. I had no idea." Stheno says as she quickly let's go of him.

"Um...it's Ok. Can someone tell me what's going on?" Steve asks completely lost. The gorgon sisters share a look and as Medusa goes to say something, the parking garage is suddenly stormed by SHIELD agents. Instinctively, the sisters get in fighting stances prepared to protect themselves, but Steve steps in." No! It's Ok! They're ok! They helped me!" Medusa looks at him surprised as an agent steps forward." Sorry Captain. We gotta take 'em in. These three have been on our radar for a long time."

Medusa and her sisters look at each other clearly annoyed and shocked that they'd been caught. They've been able to avoid SHIELD for years. Why all of a sudden would they get caught? The Fates could be so cruel sometimes.

**************************

@stars8melanin @suz-123 @ch-llmonger @cosmicmelaninflower

#steve rogers x black!oc #black medusa #greek mythology #gorgons #black oc #blackgirlmagic

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bootycallreverie · 4 years ago

Text

"Please can we not make her mayor?"

I woke up today to this fascinating question regarding Cllr. Ana Bailão’s votes to uphold systemic oppression within the Toronto Police. “Please can we not make her mayor?”

It was a deceptively complex question that got me thinking of some of the fundamentals of activism, social change and politics, that I wanted to unpack this question bit by bit.

I’ve cut it into five sections: PLEASE, CAN, WE, NOT MAKE HER, MAYOR.

///

1. PLEASE

I assume this softens the meaning of the phrase - “I want her out of politics” is pretty harsh – especially in the context of a man publicly critiquing a woman. Yet it shows us something important – we are implying we need permission to participate in politics.

Why are we asking for permission? And to whom is this appeal directed? Last time I checked, I don’t need permission to do most things in life, including participating in the political process. Our US-based friends did not ask for permission when they recently revolted against their governments; they did it even though they faced police brutality, neo-Nazi paramilitaries, psychological warfare, a global pandemic and more.

The “please” comes out of the respectability politics that makes “Ontario” as a political entity so curious. “Please don’t gut our healthcare!” is not coming from a position of strength. (Anyway, it’s much easier for progressives to walk back overzealousness in the name of justice than it is for people to walk back bigotry.)

To best challenge power, we must never apologize for having ambitious convictions. We need to champion big ideas, even if they’re ahead of the curve. Two months ago, police reform would have been considered impossible in America. And they were right, it was impossible...under the existing model. So they changed the model.

Change – especially lasting change – comes from the grassroots, so while it’s not a bad thing to support progressive political candidates, parties and organizations, it is *significantly* more important to support issues-based activists and organizations (i.e. if you give $10 monthly to the NDP, why not also give $10 to your favourite advocacy group?). Issues-based groups are formed to challenge one specific cog of power at a time and can therefore deliver deep, fundamental and long-lasting impacts. (Plus…this is a great way for potential candidates to gain some experience; get those ppl knocking on doors now and they’ll do much better in 2022.)

2. CAN

If we are asking “do we, as a community, have the capacity to elect someone better?” The answer to this is yes, but if we’re instead asking “will someone within the existing structure please FINALLY get off their ass and challenge her?” then we might ask ourselves why this hasn’t already happened. The civic left has largely allowed Cllr. Bailão (and, to a lesser extent, Mayor Wonderbread, who is merely a pathetic, respectable version of Rob Ford) to go unchallenged because she’s been deemed impossible to beat, but by not challenging her, the civic left has allowed her career to continue essentially unfettered because they don’t want to spend resources on a race they’re unlikely to win. If only there were some other downtown districts where a new, young generation of activists can start to build their careers…except the seats available are full with straight white boy progressives.

Why does the civic left protect Gord Perks, Joe Cressy and Mike Layton? Like…honestly…I just don't see what the big deal about Joe Cressy is. He bumped Ausma Malik out of the 2018 election instead of doing the right thing and making way for a supremely talented racialized woman like I'd hope someone committed to true justice would. There is even a movement in the democratic party to ask white men to not run in safe seats. [This paragraph and the next have been edited for tone, thank you to Colin Burns for encouraging me to rethink my words and my misdirected anger, my frustration naturally lies with Cllr. Bailāo's behaviour.]

Gord Perks verged into alt-left territory last year as a free-speech absolutist and consequently an apologist for bigotry when he should have defended trans folk. He even shared his disappointing thoughts publicly (yup, he did, they’re still up, don’t @ me on this one, you’ll regret it: http://gordperks.ca/toronto-public-library-chief-librarians-decision/) so considering who he seems to be, we can do better after 14 years? (TL;DR – there’s need for renewal in a lot of parts of our movements, and the labour movement is no exception.)

Mike Layton is a lovely man with his heart in the right place. I’ve volunteered for him and would gladly do it again. It therefore pains me to recognize that his last name is more than a name. I’m happy for everything he (and his team) has contributed in a rapidly changing district. My concern is that lefties can’t afford to support dynasties in the same way that liberals and conservatives can, especially in downtown districts where our odds of winning are good and where we ought to be supporting talented Black, Trans, Indigenous, disAbled and economically-disadvantaged candidates that are already on the front lines of social change. (This list is illustrative, not exhaustive.) By the time of the next election, Mike Layton will have been there for 12 years. Perhaps it’s time for him to open an opportunity for others.

3. WE

Who is “we”? Is it people in this district? Is it people in Toronto? Is it progressives? Whoever can identify this “we” and mobilize them will have the best shot of defeating her. This is the “coalition” people describe as needed to win election. Of course, this includes whoever’s running for office and their team. That organizing work needs to start right now if there’s going to be any chance of a lefty winning this seat in 2022. (If you think she isn’t already considering her council seat successor, remember that her old boss was Mario Silva, who was *coincidentally* Davenport’s City Councillor and MP for a combined 16 years.)

4. NOT MAKE HER

This is maybe the biggest hurdle to get over since “NOT ANA BAILAO” is not an option on the ballot. Considering there are no formal (lol) parties or slates on council, her name recognition is her biggest electoral asset, so a keep-it-safe campaign won’t work. Plus her public image is fairly non-toxic, so as pissed off as we all are, most people won’t be swayed by a STOP BAILAO campaign from the left (the trope of the conservative woman can be very powerful – thanks Maggie – so expect her campaign to lean pretty typically right).

When we say “Cllr. Bailão should not be Mayor” we rob ourselves of the ability to say “I think this person would make a great mayor” or “these are the some of the values I want in a mayor.” – and I don’t mean just of the City Council types. (At this point, Josh Marlow is the other councilor to watch.)

I hate hearing “why can’t we have AOC or Jacinta Arden or Anne Hidalgo or Ilhan Omar?” They didn’t come out of thin air. We already have those people here, we just haven’t elevated them to where they can make a difference and this is why. (Also, lefties, let’s seriously push for term limits and ranked ballots…especially the term limits, most ppl out there love the idea, it costs zero dollars and ensures districts have a healthy amount of turnover.)

5. MAYOR

Toronto City Council is a “weak mayor” system. The Mayor need council approval for pretty much everything important. The Mayor will find success or failure on how well he can build a team of reliable allies on council. It’s something thing Mayor Wonderbread does too well: his allies don’t offer a lot of different views. A hypothetical Mayor Bailão would probably do similar.

So then how rigid should a politician be? Are they supposed to be trustees, where we trust them to do what’s best for us and we have a check-in every 4 years? Or are they supposed to be conduits of public opinion with little regard for context? Or is a councillor meant to reflect the demographics of their district, even though they can only truly embody one set of lived experiences as an individual? Or perhaps, in the case of Cllr. Bailão, someone not dedicated to steering the ship but merely running the engine, not caring where it sails even though we've seen icebergs on the horizon? We’ve grown up in a SimCity generation where we think the mayor can make whatever they want happen. As great as that might sound sometimes, in a democracy, accountability matters. But it must come with a recognition that SimCity mayors don't fear the wrath of the voters.

///

I want to recognize that a 10% reallocation is fucking pathetic and still Toronto council couldn’t do it…but at least we know where we stand, and with whom.

We often look at politics as a sport or a soap opera, and it feels great when your team scores points or your favourite character delivers a knockout performance. Even I was like “dang girl” when Nancy Pelosi defiantly ripped up the President’s speech. I was also touched by Jagmeet Singh’s touching display of emotion the day after he was ejected from the House of Commons for calling out bigotry. But that’s not politics, that’s a long running TV drama series, so as disappointed as I am in what happened, I’m not gonna yell at her in the street because White Man Raging is not a great look these days…or ever.

So let’s not make this about my neighbour, Cllr. Ana Bailão. Let’s make it about the system of oppression she has willingly chosen to uphold and tearing that motherfucker down piece by piece.

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myheartbeatskids · 5 years ago

Text

There's a reason why you just trust people like this...

What kind of people did you ask?

Those that have been with their soulmate for So long they dont even think about what happens during that quickie when no one is looking.

For those of y'all that have had the greatest sex ever you know what i mean. That intense wetness that is like "Call the military, we need Noah's Ark brought in, the Earth will flood if you don't stop us!"

Okay Okay you kids with soul mates that aren't dead or been in prison probably don't know... Because you ain't had sex with someone other than your soulmate.

Cause she was all "for real its not like that with every one you have sex with?"

Hell no. It definitely is not.

What was most quizzical to me was did this happen before or after he pulled his pants on?

Now correct me if I'm wrong but these are jeans and not slacks... Like jeans are the thickest and most rugged material ever.

Matthew Hagan interrupts "OMG I feel like I've never had sex before! That's never happened to me! Never!"

Trust me. If she was that wet it would went all the way to his belt buckle if his pants were on during.

Which means he hurriedly pulled his pants back up over the flood without drying. Lucky for him girls are not sticky like boys otherwise I'd imagine the pain pulling those down after they dried.

So one problem that I will point out they did was she has a shawl that matches his pants so he could had wrapped it around his waist for a fashion accessory.

Or dried his loins before allowing her King to put himself back in his garage. Or pull out into the street however you want to look at it.

So I know here in the Americas some of us sleep around. And I know yall do too South. ;) ;) So don't front!

But further more most people touch themselves and so we know a dry day thats all I'm gonna say.

So i asked and this was not purposely done and i can tell by the shocked laughter it wss not.

So looking at that dry dry land of Pakistan with a mountain glacier in the background of the original photo..

It speaks Loudly of our need for Soulmates in the world.

Because sex with your soulmate is every time no matter what, creating moisture that will stop global warming and create a pure liquid that will evaporate and cause clean rain fall from you guessed it -- Mother Nature.

So now many many more toys can be flushed down the toilet by Matthew Hagan who has no ideas that sex with his soulmate is like dipping his Dick in the toilet. All due to these two having sex in desert climates!!

Now Now. Steven Lucas and I have had sex like this but both our soulmates were dead. And we both had permission and they didn't have sex and My William kinda showed him how to do it proper -- but both of us were thinking about our soulmates who were there and projecting themselves.

Now the other William that is curly mop topped and blue eyes that is Steven Lucas' Twin also has the same issue and was my William's best friend. And they look alike. So you know that was wet and wild.

But my ex Husband? Nope. 264 different people I've had sexual relations with. 86 of these people and i could have prevented global warming.

32.6% that's not even one third which just... Well i had a lot of bad one night stands. Wake up ehh... Nah life with you would be okay but it would suck!!

Then that 32.6% I couldn't ever hurt in my life. I had to protect. Because they cared about me but also their soulmate and our minds would always think about them and so never would either of us be devoted to each other which would mean we cheated ourselves and Earth of the truth.

None of us could risk losing World Peace over a relationship.

I got pregnant by a baster. Like a turkey baster. Artificial insemination. So she is William's because Jesse James and his Team of Outlaw Brothers froze it.

And so the point is.

Think about yourselves and your sexual relations. And realize you need to go get DNA tested to find your soulmate

Because it's not just a boyfriend or girlfriend, its a whole new world. Things you never believed to be possible. Unimaginable things like incredible sex every single day 90 times a day. Not kidding.

Hey I'm may be 39 years old. Celibate since my divorce and had less sexual partners than sex everyday for one year.

So, i know what I'm talking about but the best sex i have is with a ghost. And i can't because hes dead. And so you need to. Because I know it will make you a better human and a happier one and it will change you to be the best person in the world.

And if he was alive. I would had sex at least 364 days this year or 9 times in one day to make up for a missed afternoon.

If you have sexual relations everyday while pregnant the baby slides out in like 15 minutes. If not it takes 45 and your body gets ripped apart. And you never forget that pain.

And also you stop global warming!

And so men you're all absolute royalty because I know 264 of you tuck your penis upwards when you are done so you don't walk around looking like a compass.

As you can also tell on William with that direct vertical slant upwards in the wet spot.

So Fashion Police and dry off!

DNA4U police and go drop by your local airport or police station or Planned Parenthod and find out what God intended for you, what you deserve in life.

Not the crapshoot you got and don't deserve. Hey my son loved serving the world making Dildos for people like his family, moms who miss him too much but won't go in the street anymore. Its safest he says not to.

But we all deserve a nice warm loving body and not just a ghost.

So don't be a ghost of yourself!! Be all you can be! Be an Adventure! Be Happy! Be loved!! Get what you deserve!!!

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sue-bts · 8 years ago

Note

I'D NEVER I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH TO TROLL YOU I SEEK THE KNOWLEDGE OF EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU❤😭😭❤

2. what would you name your future kids?

Tim, Joan, Sal, Everett and Audrey

3. do you miss anyone?

my old director ;~:

4. what are you looking forward to?

finishing this damn fic !

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?

(already answered)

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?

extremely

7. what was your life like last year?

ridiculously bad like seriously i’ve improved so much

Anonymous said:8?

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?

hmm not really, i don’t cry unless it’s really serious

9. who did you last see in person?

my grandmother actually

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?

omg yes, as a cancer you have to be

11. are you listening to music right now?

no, but i have ear buds in in preparation

12. what is something you want right now?

more time and a muffin

13. how do you feel right now?

moderate, pretty bland with it being my last day of break but generally fine.

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?

yesterday

15. personality description

oh geez well to acquaintances i seem pretty cheery, im not one for being bratty or rude to people for no reason. if you do know me well you’ll see im sarcastic and unsympathetic, i don’t do well with emotions, i hold a lot of stuff against people, not often sharing my own feelings. im very loyal to those who haven’t hurt me. im not shy nor extremely introverted but i enjoy my quiet time, im outgoing i suppose, but primarily prefer to stick within my bounds and not go about trying to meet new people.

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?

so many times man

17. opinion on insecurities.

i think people need to go about helping their insecurities without seeking redemption in others. i think insecurities are too personal a thing to either blame on others or think can only be cured by others.

18. do you miss how things were a year ago?

not 👏🏼 at 👏🏼 all 👏🏼

19. have you ever been to New York

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?

5 fine frøkner by Gabrielle

21. age and birthday?

lmao nahhhh

22. description of crush.

i don’t have one rip

23. fear(s)

not accomplishing everything i set out to

24. height

5′7

25. role model

for the longest time it was my director but she screwed that up, so now it’s my grandma

26. idol(s)

anyone who’s become successful pursuing their hobby

27. things i hate

EASILY OFFENDED PEOPLE WHO COMPLAIN ABOUT EVERYTHING

28. i’ll love you if…

you encourage my hobbies and push me towards further success

29. favourite film(s)

About Time, Stardust, Howl’s Moving Castle, The Help, The Prestige, Mad Max, If I Stay, Up, The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh

30. favourite tv show(s)

SKAM, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Gilmore Girls, Attack on Titan

31. 3 random facts

(already answered)

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?

it’s actually a mix, i have half girl friends and half guy

33. something you want to learn

korean or norwegian lmao

34. most embarrassing moment

oh god u don’t even want to know

35. favourite subject

english

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?

being a writer, artist and moving out of america

37. favourite actor/actress

Tarjei Sandvik Moe

38. favourite comedian(s)

geez probably bo burnham

39. favourite sport(s)

nONE

40. favourite memory

performing as wendy in peter pan

41. relationship status

single af

42. favourite book(s)

(already answered)

43. favourite song ever

like ever?? probably do i wanna know bc ive liked it since it came out

44. age you get mistaken for

45. how you found out about your idol

lmao i watched youtubers react to kpop when i was stalking dan and phil

46. what my last text message says

‘im sue and i lack motivation™’

47. turn ons

yoongi’s voice

48. turn offs

SJWs lmao

49. where i want to be right now

in my family’s cabin

50. favourite picture of your idol

(already answered)

51. starsign

cancer

52. something i’m talented at

writing i guess ???

53. 5 things that make me happy

coffee, the peeps™, rain, music and chocolate

54. something thats worrying me at the moment

school starting back up

55. tumblr friends

@junior-loser @obsessive15 @deiky

56. favourite food(s)

any dessert, sushi, japanese food in general, and like ?? vegetable stir-fry is bomb

57. favourite animal(s)

C A T S and whales and just sea animals in general

58. description of my best friend

goofy, loves memes, curly hair, tall

59. why i joined tumblr

i thought it’d be a good place to watch porn and stalk phan lmao

as y’all can i see ive now answered all the questions lmao

#long post #ask game #more about me #my face #anon #ask #answered #personal #sue-bts

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astro-rain · 4 years ago

Text

delicate; b.barnes

chapter one - “to wakanda”

delicate masterlist

word count: 1,564

summary: reader works for what used to be shield as a highly skilled neuropsychologist. after the events in vienna involving the sokovia accords and a bombing, she gets an interesting request from friend and coworker sharon carter...a request involving none other than steve rogers and james barnes.

[A/N:] not my photo

warnings: brief & indirect mentions of abuse

pairings: bucky barnes x fem!reader

"I don't know Sharon. Are you sure I'm really the right person for this? I'm not, like, an Avengers level tech. Are you sure they don't want a genius or someone like Stark to do it?"

"Well, Stark is pretty busy right now, and honestly, no one knows psych like you. Not who I've met anyway."

"That is so not true. I'm willing to bet there's tons of other people you guys got somewhere who are ten times what I am."

She leaned in, discretely, and whispered.

"...not to seem like a conspiracy theorist commie or anything, but it kinda seems like people are jumping to conclusions here. Are we even sure it was Barnes who set off the bomb?"

“That's what a reasonable person would think, but once again, I'm not in charge," Sharon shrugged. "Things would probably be going a lot smoother if I was, but you can't have everything."

(Y/N) cracked a smile. Sharon was a friend, and a good one too. They'd known each other since before SHIELD was shattered in 2014. In fact, Sharon helped train her.

(Y/N) was used to secrets around her all the time. She knew Sharon had her fair share, and trying to figure them out wouldn't really get her anywhere.

"Right. Okay. Well, I'll get on this then. Thanks, Agent Carter," she teased in late response to Sharon's 'Agent (Y/N).’

Sharon offered a quick smile before walking off to attend to other business.

- - -

"Fuck," she breathed after eons of silence.

- - -

"Jesus Christ," (Y/N) murmured, staring at her office floor as Sharon finished explaining to her what happened at the Leipzig Halle Airport.

"What is this? Fuckin' Avengers Fight Night?" she wondered aloud. "How many people did you say were there?"

"Twelve total," Sharon clarified. "Five with Stark and five with Steve."

The psychologist shook her head, dumbfounded. "How did it end?"

"Steve and Barnes got out, but everyone else with them were captured and sent to the Raft."

"The Raft?!" (Y/N) exclaimed. "That's for, like, super humans! Not people like Sam Wilson or Clint Barton!"

"You're telling me."

Sharon seemed in agreement with everything she was saying. However, there was something she couldn't quite place. Like she was holding back. But holding back what?

"So what of Rogers and Barnes?" (Y/N) pushed.

Sharon got up and closed the office door before returning to her seat, leaning in, and lowering her voice. This secretive woman, god damn it.

"Well... That's what I came to talk to you about."

Oh boy. She didn't have a semblance of a single idea of what to expect. Apparently Sharon noticed.

"We're the only ones that know this. They're fine..." the agent trailed off, "They're in Wakanda, but they need a little help."

They totally have a thing.

"Noted," said (Y/N) with a nod, "but why are you telling me this? Does he want the profile analysis or something? I don't see how he would need it if he's known Barnes for however long."

"Not exactly..." Sharon fidgeted with her hands. "We need you to go to Wakanda.”

#marvel #bucky barnes #bucky x you #bucky imagine #bucky x y/n #bucky fanfic #bucky x reader #bucky fic #bucky angst #mcu #steve rogers #sharon carter #captain america #bucky reader insert #bucky drabble #bucky headcanon #bucky blurb

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