#if someone knows what i can fix in it and wants to yell at me about it please do
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loveroped · 1 year ago
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I don't think I'll finish the drawings this was apart of, but I quite like this so it's getting posted posted
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guhhhhhhhhhhh · 12 days ago
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Oh little people in my phone, we're really in it now 😔😔
#it's lay on my bed yell into mattress hours#I can't tell if I'm reasonably stressed. over stimulated. or emotionally heightened because of the steroid I am on. but#today has been too many things and I feel.#sooooooo done#so done with everything#it raining and I haven't seen the sun in ages. I have bronchitis and haven't been Not Sick in a whole ass month#I have so many things to get done before Christmas which is IN A WEEK JESUS CHRIST#my CAR isn't drivable which SUCKS and it needs new TIRES and probably very expensive ENGINE REPAIRS and#my dad says he can fix them but I still have to take it into the shop just to make sure we know for sure what the problem is but#the it's already going to be in the shop and HES SICK and also like. busy. and doesn't have time to fix car#and so I might as well just pay out the fucking wazooo for them to fix it#but idk how long that will take#and I'm borrowing my grandmas car which is GREAT! like I'm so grateful to have that as an option but also! I feel BAD because it's her car#and she does actually use it and like. I don't want to take that away from her for too long#because then I feel BURDENSOME#and my mom just told me that one of my relatives just passed away and I didn't know her too well but her mom ALSO died last year like#On Christmas Day like very traumatically and I feel soo soo bad for all my cousins who have basically just had the entire Christmas season#ruined for them because they will have lost their mom AND their grandma around that time#and that HORRIBLE like oh my godddddd#and like#this holiday seasons is feeling very weird and different and worse and not BAD But like many things have changed this year and as someone#who does NOT enjoy little changes in routine and appreciates tradition uh. hehe the lines are blurring and it's stressing me outtttttt#and I got home and I had to pee and I look like shit because I've been running around all day#only to realize I left my keys Inside The House and my roomate had locked the door when he went to the gym and#thankfully the gym is a stones throw away from our house but he wasn't answering his phone#so I had to GO THERE. THROUGH THE RAIN. looking like the amount of tired and done that I am. and walk into the gym that is naturally PACKED#because it's right after work. and do the walk of shame past the v friendly gym owner who I haven't seen in MONTJ because I've been SICK#and haven't been able to work out which i ALSO FEEL GUILTY AND BAD ABOUT and#walked past all the Busy Fit Gym People in my normal person clothes to the very back where my roomate was and stand there while he finishes#his silly little reps to get his keys from him
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pulchrasilva · 9 months ago
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Having people you care about who are suicidal while you're not suicidal is truly a special torture I think I want to go back to wanting to kill myself im gonna throw up
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nereidprinc3ss · 6 months ago
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be my angel
in which BAU fem!reader was injured on the job, but is refusing painkillers at the hospital. spencer thinks he knows why.
fluff (+a little angst) warnings/tags: established relationship, hospital stuff, reader got beat up by an unsub, discussions of spencer's past addiction, mentions of period cramps, reader ends up being administered some sort of painkiller a/n: another draft i found in my literal hundreds of pages of abandoned wips and fixed up cause it's cute, I hope you like!!!
Spencer is tearing through the hospital. They all keep saying you’re going to be okay, but what does that even mean? Why is nobody telling him anything? He’s not even sure he heard what the orderly at the front desk said, but his feet are carrying him with a strident purpose through the winding white halls, so he has to assume he at least subconsciously knows where he’s going. 
Finally he spots Penelope, a beacon in her candy-colored clothing, speaking to a doctor in hushed tones. Penelope sees him approaching and turns away from the doctor, looking harried and exhausted. 
“Is she okay? What happened?” Spencer demands, before either of the others can say a word. 
“She’s okay,” the doctor assures. “She was beat up pretty bad—concussion, broken ribs, some bruising that looks worse than it is. There was a clean shot through her arm, but—” 
His blood runs cold. Nobody told him you were shot. Why had nobody told him you were shot? 
“I need to see her.” 
The doctor frowns, glancing between the two agents. 
“I’m sorry, are you her spouse?” 
“Yes. No, not yet, I just—I need to see her, please. Now.” 
“Sir, unless she—” 
“Just let him see her!” Penelope practically yells. “She wants him here, believe me.”  
The doctor clenches her jaw and scribbles something on her clipboard. 
“Okay. Maybe you can try to convince her to accept some painkillers.” 
Spencer’s frown deepens. 
“She’s refusing pain management?” 
“We gave her as much ibuprofen as we could, but she refused anything stronger than that. She has to be in a lot of pain right now, and there’s no background of addiction.” 
“I’ll talk to her,” Spencer says, already twisting the silver door handle. He has a sneaking suspicion as to why you denied pain treatment, and it makes him feel incredibly guilty. More than he already did, after this entire debacle. 
The sight of you, bloodied and bruised and obviously suffering has his heart splintering right down the middle. Whatever meager semblance of a smile he can scrounge up and offer is reflected back to him on you—which only makes him feel worse. As always, you’re putting on a brave face. 
“Hey,” Spencer says quietly as he closes the door behind him. 
“Hi,” you croak. “How do I look?” 
He approaches, sitting on the edge of the bed and pushing your hair away from your face. 
“How do you feel? The doctor told me you wouldn’t accept pain medication,” he murmurs. 
You sniff. 
“I feel okay. Did she tell you it’s not as bad as it looks?” 
But your voice is so small, so wavery and weak, that he knows you’re lying. 
“Sweetheart...” 
You’ve been holding it together since the unsub beat you nearly unconscious. You held it together as he ran away, even got a couple shots in before he turned around and returned fire. You held it together while you sat against the dirty truck, bleeding out, not sure if your team was coming, and you held it together in the ambulance, and for the past thirty minutes in this hospital bed. But all it takes is one gentle word from Spencer, with that concerned, solicitous look in his eye, and the floodgates are opening. Tears spring up in your eyes and begin silently falling down your dirtied cheeks. 
“It’s okay!” you attempt to reassure him, affecting cheeriness even through the tears. “It doesn’t hurt. I’m fine!” 
He says your name soft and low and he tries his best to keep his tone even though he is liable to burst into tears or start yelling at someone (not you) at any minute.  
“I know that’s not true. You have broken ribs and a gunshot wound. I know how badly it hurts to breathe and how it feels every time you move your arm. That is too much damage for over-the-counter anti-inflammatories. You need real analgesics.” 
“I don’t,” you whisper. Your teary eyes make his whole body ache. He squeezes your hand—the one that’s not connected to the wounded arm. 
“Because of me?” You stare at him blankly, as if you’re shocked he was able to put two and two together. “I promise you don’t need to worry about that.” 
You sniffle. 
“But what if—what if they give me the drugs and I get all weird and it’s, it’s like... triggering for you, or something?” 
“It’s been a really long time since I’ve worried about that. I’d rather see you a little tired and out of it than in extreme pain and trying to pretend you’re not. You getting the pain relief you need in a medical emergency is not going to make me relapse.” 
“But I really think I could go without,” you begin, voice already tightening around a cry. “I’ve—I’ve had period cramps that were worse than this.” 
Despite himself, he chuckles. Goes back to stroking your hair. 
The laughter fades quickly. All the pain you’re in is so evident in your eyes. The dissociative glassiness, the tension around them, the bloodshot quality—he's seen it many times before, and he hates it on you. 
“Will you please tell them you’re ready to take something? They won’t give you Dilaudid. It’s too strong. They’ll give you something that I’d have no interest in anyway.” 
“Not funny,” you whisper. 
He ignores this. 
“Will you let me call the doctor back in?” 
You take a deep, shuddering breath—or at least, you try to, before you’re loosing a sharp squeak that deteriorates into a little sob. The ribs. 
Spencer doesn’t bother asking again, just gets up and begins to walk away as efficiently as his legs will carry him. You need painkillers and he thinks it might be fastest to just fetch the doctor or a nurse from the hallway. 
“Wait,” you plead.  
He stops. Reminds himself that you need him right now—not his medical opinions. Spencer turns back around and approaches again, crouching by your bedside this time. 
“What, honey?” 
“I don’t...” 
You trail off, overcome by something like fear in the width and shine and nervous dart of your eyes. Spencer knows, everybody at the BAU knows, that showing fear to a serial killer will get you killed that much quicker. During your time alone with the unsub, which is a can of worms Spencer literally cannot psychologically open right now, you had to put on your bravest face. Even while you were being beaten within an inch of your life. Even when you thought you were going to die, alone, and that your team—that Spencer—wasn't coming back for you. Because that’s the kind of thing you have to do to cope when you’re at rock bottom. But you were terrified. Petrified. That doesn’t just go away—and Spencer knows it’ll be bumping against the surface until it finds a way out.  
He has to remember that just because you look unafraid and you act unafraid doesn’t mean you aren’t. 
“You were so brave,” he manages after he’s sure he can say it without incident, swiping moisture from your cheek. “You did everything exactly right.” 
“I know,” you whisper, chin trembling. Spencer knows you, and he knows this kind of trauma well enough to know that you’re thinking, I did everything exactly right, and it wasn’t enough. I did everything exactly right and this is what I have to show for it. 
“But nobody needs you to act like it wasn’t hard, okay? You don’t need to pretend like it doesn’t hurt. You were so, so brave, angel. You don’t have to be brave anymore.” 
Your eyes squeeze shut, sending a new wash of tears over your tacky cheeks. A few moments pass. You say nothing. He hopes you’re not going to hide away inside yourself like he did. 
“Will you please, please, let me get the doctor?” 
At least this time you don’t immediately say no. 
“Will you come right back?” 
“Of course.” 
Finally, you nod your hesitant assent, and Spencer presses a careful kiss to your forehead. 
A few minutes later, the doctor—who was shocked that Spencer was able to so quickly change your very made-up mind—is back, and so is Spencer. It only takes a moment for them to determine the best course of action for you and soon the fist around his heart is loosening its grip as he watches some of the agony melting from your eyes. 
“Better?” he murmurs as the nurse who’d administered the drugs leaves, fanning his thumb over the underside of your wrist. You nod, already appearing sleepy. 
“Can you lie down with me?” 
He smiles at the way your words slip against each other, simply relieved that you’re able to relax and no longer in extreme pain. 
“Hospital beds aren’t rated for two people.” 
“Spencer.” 
It’s enough for him to climb onto the bed—not that he was ever going to deny you what you wanted to begin with. The fit isn’t exactly perfect—he's a bit too long and combined the two of you are just slightly too wide—but with some finagling it’s comfortable enough. Spencer has slipped his arm underneath you and your head is on his shoulder and he’s so glad to have you in his arms and so grateful that you’re okay he does something almost like praying in his head as he kisses your hair. 
“Hey. Ask me about my bruises.” 
“Why? Do they still hurt?” 
“You should see the other guy.” 
It’s dumb and it doesn’t make sense because you didn’t bother waiting for him to actually set the joke up—but he smiles dryly nonetheless. 
“Can you please give me... I don’t know, 36 hours before you start making jokes about almost dying?” 
“Clock starts now.” 
“Thank you.” He feels your lips curve into a half-conscious smile against his neck. It’s a wonderful feeling. “How are your ribs? Breathing feels okay?” 
“Mhm. Love breathing.” 
“Mhm. And your arm?” 
“Like I got shot.” 
“Well, that’s pretty much unavoidable. But not as bad as before, right?” 
“Right. Spencer?” 
“What, my love?” 
A little pleased puff of air warms his shoulder. He carefully rubs your hip. 
“Will you tell me how brave I was again?” 
He takes a silent, very deep breath.  
“You were incredibly brave. And smart, too. I’m really proud of you for how you handled that situation. I’m so sorry you had to go through that, but I don’t think anyone could have handled it better. Especially when you chose to stay put by the truck, instead of chase him. I know that wasn’t what you wanted to do, but it was the right choice.” 
“I thought you guys maybe weren’t coming,” you murmur, no hint of sadness in your smushed, flat voice—like you’re barely awake. “I waited half an hour and I thought you weren’t gonna find me.” 
“Angel, I will always find you. We didn’t stop looking even once, as soon as we noticed you were gone. I’m just sorry I wasn’t with Emily and Rossi when they got to you.” 
“’Nelope told me... she told me you got really angry and scary.” 
He stares at the ceiling and considers this. 
“I could see... how what I was feeling would be interpreted that way. I was pretty angry. But not at Penelope or any of them. I was mostly just scared.” 
“I’m sorry I scared you,” you whisper. “And I’m sorry if I made you mad.” 
“You did not. I wasn’t mad at you. And it’s not your fault that I got scared. You were just trying to do your job. None of this is your fault.” 
“She also said that you said fuck like... three times.” 
“Mm... doesn’t sound like me,” he evades. You giggle, and the sound is more a relief than any drug he could take.
“No, seriously, I’m so mad I missed it. I love hearing you swear. Tell me what you said—and you have to cause I’m all messed up so I get whatever I want.” 
He sighs in mock annoyance. 
“Well, she’s wrong. I only said fuck once. I used fucking as an intensifier twice.” 
You hum. 
“Sexy.” 
“Alright,” Spencer laughs, flushing as he moves his hand to your shoulder. “Go to sleep before I tell them to up your dosage, weirdo.” 
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staryuee · 5 months ago
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NOT SAYING “I LOVE YOU” BACK.
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꒰warnings꒱ not proofread pls don’t yell at me *sniffles*
⠀꒲ ` synopsis . . . [char] and you tend to say your i love yous pretty regularly, it’s become a subconscious routine for the both of you; what would happen if either one of you just suddenly didn’t respond?
⠀꒲ ` characters . . . venti, diluc, xiao, tartaglia, kazuha, ayato, alhaitham, wanderer, lyney, neuvillette, wriothesley, arlecchino
⠀꒲ ` notes . . . ദ്ദി(。•̀ ᗜ^) drabbles vary in length significantly because…i’m a little unwell with astarion brainrot rn and i will not rest till i get to kiss my beautiful vampiric man — also i apologise for making some of these more angsty than intended…i couldn’t help myself haha
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VENTI — 温迪
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ��.ᐟ ⊹
ʚ venti? of all people? not saying i love you to his beloved windblume whom he’d personally resurrect ancient gods for if they asked with that sweet, melodic voice of theirs?
ʚ the only viable reason for him not replying can most likely be bottled down to him being a brat. a spoiled one at that. you give him so much affection it’s a little scary sometimes to think someone just know all of his ins and out as if they held his heart within the palm of their hand meaninglessly. so how do you expect him to be satisfied with a mere phrase when he wants you so desperately?
“i’m leaving for a commission, i’ll be back in a few hours; love you, honey.” you said per routine, fixing your hair in the mirror that stood perfectly near the doorway under venti’s request (he likes seeing how his braids look after you do them in the morning).
what you expected was a reply, but certainly not the one that followed: “alright, bye bye~” venti tilted his head back as his body slinked on the couch, his eyes scanning yours upside down with that look on his face which suggested he knew exactly what he was doing.
“goodbye, venti, i love you.” you re-enunciate, arms crossing firmly over your chest pridefully to mirror venti’s stubbornness that fell immediately upon sight of your pretty face glancing over at his. oh, he really couldn’t resist you for too long.
“i’ll say it back if you stay with me today!” he giggled, teeth on full display as he grinned widely; fully aware you’d indulge him even if for only a little while.
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
“windblume…” venti sadly slumped his head on your shoulder, leaving enough space for his eyes to glance at the book in your hands as you continued to read despite his sulking.
“i accidentally packed my schedule full with a flurry of performances…i’m afraid i won’t be able to indulge in your cuddles all day like i wanted to,” he whined, kissing the side of your neck to compensate for the lack of affection he’s going to have to put up with.
really, if he could, he’d pretend all the strings on his lyre magically untuned themselves into havoc if it meant giving an excuse to be back in your warm hold. but as a god of the wind, and one who shared the passions of music no less, it was more or less his duty to share his w with the residents of mondstadt when asked so kindly.
“i promise i’ll return to you soon as i can! no quick stop at angel’s share this time either,” venti managed a chuckle despite the inner thumping of his heart at the mere prospect of returning home to you — an experience he never thought he’d fulfil in his lifetime. “i love you dearly, my darling, i’ll see you soon~”
he leaned over the back of the couch to help reach the side of your face, lips pursing into a fish-like pout as he awaited to hear those beloved words that were always followed by a rewarding kiss. yet you merely hummed in acknowledgement of his presence and his soon departure.
who do you think you are?
venti’s brows immediately knit down together in frustration. “windblume…i said, i love you,” he leaned closer, “sweetheart…come on, say it back!” he finally nuzzled his cheek against yours, trying to elicit some sort of response from you that didn’t border on full on ignoring him. usually that slight uplift of your lips would be enough, but with the additional context that he’d be away from you for so long, venti couldn’t cope with a mere smile!
feeling a little flicker of breeze behind you, goosebumps prickle your skin and a delicate shiver runs down your spine, the little gust of wind disappearing as quick as it came. venti hooked his fingers beneath your chin, delicately forcing your eyes to meet his. “won’t you tell your god you love him?”
those gorgeous and elaborate white wings of his flutter quietly, twitching in anticipation as he excitedly awaits for what he’s been dying to hear. you sigh, leaning towards him to press the most featherlight kiss on the side of his face. “i love you too, now go along already, you’re going to be late.”
R. DILUC — 迪卢克
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
ʚ you’ve probably, unfortunately, caught him at a relatively bad time if he had completely ignored your affections. after all, while not necessarily a really active recipient, diluc is more than happy to indulge your carefree “i love yous” and kisses.
ʚ there’s no way he’d ever intentionally ignore or not reply to an “i love you”, especially one that’s so sickly sweet to his ears
“i’m going to bed, luc,” you yawn, arms stretching far out in front of you as you push yourself away from the desk that was littered with several papers stacked on top of each other in various piles that were marked by different pen colours. “you better come join me soon, alright? i love you.”
diluc hums and nods his head, eyes sunken into his skull as his fingers continue flipping the pen within his hand in a sleepy dance as he just barely managed to focus on the words that seemed to squeeze together. none of yours even register in his mind as you sorrowfully close the office door to head to your usually shared bedroom.
it only takes a little while for his brain to catch up to his heart. so that’s why he felt it flutter…
diluc immediately packs away his things to the best of his drowsy ability, hanging up his coat that he honesty forgot he still had draped on himself before he burst into your bedroom rather dramatically. panting from having rushed himself, his arms propping himself up with both sides of the door way, diluc looks away all flushed.
“…i love you as well, i’m sorry for not saying it,” he sighs in comfort as you raise a brow at him, amused at just how quickly he managed to wrap thing ups purely out of guilt that he failed to reciprocate your intentions.
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
oh. well…you’ve must’ve had a reason, right?
you wouldn’t just leave right in the morning for a commission, tell him goodbye when he declared his love to you without you repeating the same routine back to him? right?
and yet, you did; and now diluc finds himself in the peculiar position of being overly worried. he has strength, power and stability beyond imagination, but without your affection as fuel, what use are those things?
staring back at the ticking clock continuously, the wet rag in hand helping him clean up some ink that spilled across his hands as a frustrated groan escaped him. what kind of man have you turned him into that he can’t even focus on important tasks merely because you didn’t say a few simple words?
maybe that’s where the problem lies. the words “i love you” always seemed simple to you, something that diluc can admit had found himself jealous of on occasion, so now that he’s absent from something so easy, it’s a little difficult to not overthink the possibilities that the phrase has become harder to swallow for you.
diluc nearly slams his head on his desk at such a thought. he can’t lose his mind over something so silly, it’s fine. you’re both fine.
taking another meandering glance at the clock, diluc’s chair scraped across the wood as he flung on his coat, brushing it clean as he sauntered downstairs with the most grumpy expression dawn winery has seen in a while.
“honey, why do you look so upset?” your sweet voice lured him back into sanity as diluc’s steps immediately calmed down, his eyes widening momentarily as you seemed to return much earlier than expected from your travels. shaking his head, diluc sighs, “it’s nothing, my love — let’s go out for dinner, is that all right?”
XIAO — 魈
not really a surprise, honestly.
xiao isn’t necessarily known for being a fun-loving, happy-go-lucky, super affectionate bunny and as much as he wishes he could just vocalise the song that plays in his heart whenever you meet his eyes, he’s unable to reciprocate your affections in a way that’s satisfactory.
you’ve grown to accept such a fact. xiao, on the other hand, hasn’t. it’s like a little itch for him that he can’t scratch but desperately wants to. doesn’t mean he won’t show his love in other more discreet ways.
there are the subtle things; like the way he ensures your favorite dish is always ready when you come over, how he lingers a bit longer during a goodbye hug almost as if he’s scared to let you go, or the times he’ll simply sit in comfortable silence with you (though, that is common), his presence a quiet yet powerful testament to his feelings.
sometimes, he leaves small tokens for you to find: a flower carefully placed on your doorstep, a hand-written note slipped into your bag that you can tell was written in a hurry due to how sloppy the handwriting looks, a charm he crafted himself hidden among your belongings that he specifically sought the guidance of zhongli from. it's in these gestures that his love for you shines through, even if the words remain unspoken.
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
there are times when xiao escapes his shell, and it’s in those quiet moments where you’re both completely alone without even the whistling of the wind to eavesdrop on you atop the comfortable slope of a mountain, that xiao verbally tells you how much he adores you. sometimes a little more poetically than intended, but he hopes his words pass through to you in the form of a flutter.
“…a vow as enduring as the sea and mountains,” xiao mumbled nervously, his hand awkwardly hovering over yours in hesitance before he sucked in a breath and decided to just give in and delicately interlock your fingers. watching as you tilted your head in confusion, xiao looked away and muttered again: “i meant that i love you.”
the silence and the little nod that followed, which was all meant as a little ploy to tease him for being so cute and flustered over a term you didn’t even need to hear on the regular, resulted in xiao’s chest to tighten anxiously. did you not feel the same way anymore? but then again, that devious smile of yours (which xiao could differentiate the style of pretty instinctively) made it certain there was a deeper meaning behind the quiet.
“it's alright," he whispered, his voice barely audible. "you don't have to say anything. i just wanted you to know."
TARTAGLIA — 公子
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
ʚ petty petty petty, absolutely done out of pettiness and just being an overall ginger brat.
ʚ you forgot to say good morning immediately after you woke up? haha, what was your name again? aw, you walked passed him on your travels even though he deliberately came over to see you? guess he’s not paying for all your stuff today… (he will, just ask).
one morning, groggy and half-asleep, you stumbled out of bed, forgetting to meekly mumble your usual "good morning, my darling, i love you" as you got up for the day. it was a small and rather insignificant oversight, but not for childe.
later that day, as you wandered through the vibrant streets of fontaine, you spotted his unmistakable ginger hair approaching. waving and smiling at your beloved, expecting some sort of hyper response back, you awaited his towering presence with a hand on your hip. he walked right past you. full on. turning your head with furrowed brows and jaw hung low, you notice that little playful, shit-eating smirk on his lips.
a little confused, you called out to him, "ajax! come back here.”
he turned, feigning surprise despite clearly having seen you (and, unbeknownst to you, having been watching you for the past couple minutes as you checked out several vendors). "oh, it's you. i almost didn't recognize you."
rolling your eyes, you walked up to him. "seriously?” both of you stared at each other in scrutiny, tartaglia fighting back the urge to squeeze you within his arms and whine at you for your negligence while you fought the urge to pull him down by his sunlit strands to coax some sense out of him. “are you mad at me?”
he shrugged nonchalantly, eyes twinkling with mischief you recognised immediately. "hmm, who’s mad? i just forgot who you were for a moment." let’s not mention the fact he has your front, back and side silhouettes memorised to the point he could trace it with his eyes closed expertly.
when you both parted ways, tartaglia making up some excuse that he had to buy some souvenirs for his siblings despite you knowing full well he was just listening to your reprimand from a week ago that he needed respite from being brutalised repeatedly, you found yourself linking pieces of red yarn together internally.
oh he’s just such a little shit isn’t he?
the sun set and bedazzled the sky in golden red hues, you walked back to your shared accommodation and a hefty amount of apologetic snacks filling your bag. normally, when you opened the door, ajax would jump at you. it was obvious from the way he sat leaned back on the couch that he was biting back that urge too.
grinning, you approached him, feeling a mix of amusement and frustration. "you know i love you, right?"
he glanced at you, his expression softening for a moment, god he really missed you so much even if only parted for a few hours at most. "hmm, do you? because i don't recall hearing such a thing in the morning."
you laughed, shaking your head at his childishness. settling yourself next to him, arms encasing around his wounded torso, you muttered a little compromise: "alright, honey. tomorrow, first thing. i promise."
tartaglia finally relented, pulling you into a gentle embrace that led to him exhaling a breath he was holding (probably a subtle way to get his loud heart to stop beating so furiously). "good. i suppose i can forgive you this time.“
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
ajax had disobeyed your orders again.
even when being repeatedly asked by friends and his own lover alike, he just couldn’t behave in a way that didn’t result in at the very least, a few scratches and bruises on his freckled skin. it irritated you to no end.
irritation, of course, led to frustration. i mean, when you have to regurgitate the same instructions to someone you adore to death, it becomes exhausting. you didn’t necessarily argue about it, you simply tuned off.
sitting in bed with a book cradled between your fingertips, a mellow tune humming in the background from your vinyl as you soaked in the fantasy you were thoroughly engaged in. none of those things could unfortunately deafen the whines from ajax as he cozied himself up next to you, a silent groan slipping past his lips as he incidentally tore at one of his bandages.
“kochanie…” his nose nuzzled against your clothes as he found himself laying on your warm thighs. “i already apologised for being a dumbass, i swear i love you and i’ll listen to you properly next time.”
he purses his lips into a pout as you ignore him and continue to scan your eyes over the ink. “come on, i love you, sweetheart.” he nudged you, pinching you as delicately as possible but enough to elicit a gasp from you as you finally glance over at him.
“and i love peace and quiet, so if you could, zip it.”
surely you don’t think that was a good enough response for someone as needy for attention as ajax?
“i’m so hurt…” he pitifully grumbled, arms crossing over his firm chest as he continued staring up at you with a gaze that meant “you are not getting out of this”.
“won’t even spare a small kiss for your wounded lover? a hug? a cuddle? even just a whisper of your voice? how am i meant to live—“ you hush childe’s antics by squishing his cheeks together, forcing a fish like pout to form with his lips.
“i love you too, you’re just annoying.”
he’d take that over you fully ignoring him any day.
K. KAZUHA — 枫原万叶
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
ʚ not possible, thank you next character.
ʚ the only possible way kazuha would ever not indulge your i love yous is when he’s away to a different nation and he sends you a response letter that takes weeks to come to your hands, or if that same letter somehow gets wet or ruined while in transit and his affections get dampened and smudged
ʚ otherwise? kazuha doesn’t see the point in stubborn behaviour. if there’s a problem, though there hardly ever is, he’s under the pretence a couple should talk about it with a clear mind before making a final decision or statement — or in this case, the retraction of affection.
ʚ you’re his map, with the treasure being your heart. why would he ever choose to not tell you he loves you when he gets the chance? you already lack sufficient time with another, and kazuha prefers using the time he does have with you to show you how much he adores you (whatever way that manifest as).
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
kazuha absolutely smothers you in his love. though that usually feels more like you’re resting within the comfort of a sandy beach as soft washes of waves tickle your skin. you’re never short of a supply of affection.
that’s why a devious idea popped into your head. what if you just didn’t reciprocate?
“my heart,” kazuha’s breathy voice popped the bubble that hung over your head. “you’ve been spaced out for a while now, do you need a kiss to help you refocus?” you had to stop yourself from jumping at the opportunity.
“uh, no it’s fine, you don’t have to,” the reply made kazuha raise an eyebrow quizzically. that’s certainly not something he expected to hear especially after not seeing you for a while; but, he’d respect your choice. it’s not like he’s desperate for something so simple, you could just genuinely not be interested.
“hm…alright then, beloved.” he smiled sincerely, head falling to rest on your shoulder as his hand gently rested on the small of your back, rubbing soothing circles that mirrored the shape of the moon that cast a glow on you both. “i love you.”
he could’ve sworn he just said he loved you, so why did the winds bellow a response instead? coughing into his hand to clear his throat, thinking that perhaps you just didn’t hear him, he repeated: “i love you, songbird.”
met with silence again, kazuha simply stays quiet. he doesn’t need a reply, that’s not why he says sweet things to you like he’s writing a lyrical sonnet. he tells you he loves you because it helps write the song in his heart that beats whenever he’s near you in a much more coherent way.
K. AYATO — 神里绫人
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
ʚ this man oozes with romantic appeal. even if he’s off voyaging to a whole other nation he’ll find a way to not only say i love you, but also to say his good morning and good nights (accompanied with poorly doodled attempts at kiss marks to make up for the lack of physical touch).
ʚ when he’s upset? gods no. he could be frustrated with you to the point he needs a break, and regardless he’ll leave the room with a reminder he loves you. he doesn’t need you getting second thoughts and therefore won’t ever plant them.
ʚ he’s too busy? so? thoma has two hands i’m sure he can handle giving you letters that are merely love notes while he cleans the abode (assuming you and ayato live together separately from where he works…you can imagine how much thoma despises this errand despite his loyalty).
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
“greetings, love,” ayato’s arms slid around your middle, chin coming to rest atop your shoulder as he hums a sweet tune as if he were a bird coming back home to his nest. a rather direct analogy, since that’s exactly the occurrence.
plagued with hours of paperwork and meetings with government issues and secret organisations that god forbid you or ayaka ever found out about, ayato has missed you gravely. if he didn’t know better he’d demand this sort of sin to be classified as a national crime with the sentence being told to stay home with your spouse all day (his literal dream).
now that he’s free for at least a little while, peace alas twinkling within his eyes as they close tightly to enjoy the silence as he clings onto you, ayato does feel like all the pain and ink he went through was totally worth it. if the price he had to pay for holding you oh so tightly is simply meaningless signatures on several documents, he’s willing to waste the entire supply of ink within inazuma — he wants this reward to last as long as possible, after all.
“mm, you smell divine, are you using the flower-scented perfume i sent you the other week? i love it,” he rambled, lips pressing against your nape as you busied yourself with some crocheting, ayato’s eyes opening only to focus on the way your deft hands moved so skilfully. he’d make a comment about how he wished those hands were on him instead, but he had a particular reputation to uphold — and lewd impatient man certainly wasn’t part of it.
“more importantly, sweetheart,” ayato cooed, beginning to trail kisses around your neck and any exposed skin he managed to find, “i love you. so, look at me won’t you?”
merely turning your head to plant a kiss to the side of his jaw in a way of compromise, you otherwise remained silent. “you know,” ayato smiled devilishly, his hand beginning to play with your hair soothingly. “i bought some stuff on my travels recently, a lot of things that are meant for you, of course.”
“i can’t wait to surprise you tonight during dinner.”
that was a threat. maybe not a direct one, but you could recognise the slyness in that man’s voice soon as he mentioned buying “stuff” — things that were definitely substitutes for poison (a little far fetched, but it’s best to assume whatever he conjures up will be the worst thing possible to save yourself the trip to a hospital bed).
“i love you too.” you appeased, and his face immediately lightened, arms returning around you as if finally satiated.
ayato huffs a stifled laugh, quelling your worries with a simple: “i’ll have the staff know you’d like your favourite dish prepared.”
ALHAITHAM — 艾尔海森
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
ʚ lowkey, it’s a bit of a 50/50 with him…?
ʚ sometimes, he just genuinely doesn’t hear you. whether it’s because he’s subconsciously disassociating, overstimulated from excessive noise (it’s pretty much canon that he’s autistic, you can’t give me a character that constantly wears headphones and only speaks when spoken to and expect me not to connect the dots) or simply because whatever’s playing in his ears was a little too loud and had managed to drown out your words — these specifics are never intended, and he’s more likely to reply back if you repeat yourself (or give him some time).
ʚ other times though, is simply him teasing you. remember that one scene at the end of the interdarshan festival where alhaitham said, “best things are told thrice” (or whatever the quote was), yeah he commits to that in this scenario too.
ʚ he’ll pretend he can’t hear you just so he can see the sweet frustration in your eyes as you mumble the words “i love you” through gritted teeth. he’ll smirk it off subtly and reciprocate…after a while of course. perhaps when you’re falling asleep on his chest once you’re finally cuddled in bed together, you’ll manage to catch his hushed whisper.
the world was intent on making alhaitham break down today. he woke up without you in bed with him this morning, meaning he couldn’t brush his teeth while next to you as he passed you things that you required to get ready to start the day. from that, none of the foods or snacks he liked were available and the only option were fruits or meals he didn’t like or he weren’t in the mood for.
already feeling irritated and grumpy, him nearly spilling a vase on the books he had perfectly stacked up to binge read as he bumped into the corner of the table could’ve made him bang his head brutally on the wall. this wouldn’t have been a problem if kaveh didn’t place something so fragile and wobbly on something that’s in the way.
alas, when he finally died down for the afternoon, book in hand, a melody passing by his ear as he tried to focus on breathing, all a sudden that irritation just slowly came creeping back. the words on the page squished together like some sort of cartoon from fontaine as they began to make no coherent sense even as he went over every line twice.
to make it worse? you had just come back home.
that sounds bad, but for alhaitham it was a travesty. now he wasn’t able to at the very least embrace you in greeting in fear he’d lash out at the sudden contact. noticing the scrunching of his brows and the way his jaw looked like he’d been clenching it subconsciously for hours, you smiled out of sympathy, knowing from experience that this was most definitely another case of the domino effect of bad shit happening.
“need me to leave you alone for a bit?” you asked as quietly as possible but in an octave he wouldn’t twitch at in frustration.
he shook his head. a little surprising, but you complied with his wish and sat down on the floor next to him as he laid back on the couch as if in an impromptu therapy session. alhaitham held out his hand for you and you gently but surely placed yours on top, a delicate reminder that he was free to express whatever was on his mind when the world finally felt a little more peaceful.
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
it’s not like alhaitham really says he loves you verbally, he prefers showing his love to you though actions. after all, actions speak louder than words — what’s the point of telling you he loves you if he doesn’t have the actions to back it up?
but for the sake of the scenario, let’s imagine alhaitham decides to spoil you with one his few vocal affirmations. his hands slowly running up and down the spine of your back, chest rising and falling in slow steady breaths as you burrow yourself into his side. alhaitham was reluctantly reading a romance book that you forcefully recommended him in hopes he’d learn a few things that would make you swoon (despite him doing plenty such things already).
“i love you.” he randomly blurts, his eyes clearly having scanned over the same phrase within the page he was on since he rather quickly skipped past it once your eyes caught glimpse of it. alhaitham is a confident, sometimes arrogant, man — nothing ever truly bothers him when in regards to the words or actions of other people unless they pose a threat to someone he loves.
however, in this case, your lack of words makes his brows scrunch down, bright teal eyes now scrutinising you as you clearly try to hide away a giggle. “don’t you think it’s a little rude to not reply to someone’s confession.” he asks in a monotone voice, attention returning to the words on the page that now seemed irrelevant.
“if you want me to be like the characters in your little romance stories, how about you also commit to that yourself?” a little harsh sounding, but when faced with alhaitham’s pettiness, this is probably the most lenient he’s ever been to anyone.
WANDERER — 流浪者
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
ʚ another one that’s not necessarily surprising.
ʚ he likes using the phrase to tease or slander you, if anything. case in point: “oh i love you alright, but that doesn’t mean you get to steal my blanket in the middle of the night.” or “i love you more when you keep completely silent."
“i’m convinced you don’t love me.” ah god, not another one of your little helpless spiels again. this sort of conversation starter would normally set of a warranted number of red flags. in this case, however, both of you understood it was more like the start of a theatrical display of your pettiness.
“right, and why’s that?” scara asked unamused, face not changing from his casual stoicism as he scanned over a possibly illegal book he snuck from the library (and if this conversation goes one way you might just tattle to auntie nahida).
“you slept on the couch yesterday even after i cooked your favourite dish and got you out of that lecture kusanali forced you to attend by pretending we had chores to do,” you list off your good deeds on your fingers, your body sinking next to his on the couch that seemed more like a partner in crime than just a piece of furniture.
scara rolled his eyes. licking the tip of his fingertip to turn the page on his book, he huffed a response absentmindedly: “i do love you, but you just keep pushing me off the bed because of my cooler temperature so i got annoyed — simple as.”
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
‘oh, so just fuck me i guess?’
it’s already so difficult for him to even admit how much he cares for you, so to have such a hefty phrase leave his lips and be left with silence? he’s a little more than pissed.
scara’s eyebrows crunched together, confusion written all over his face at the sudden change in your demeanor. you’re always the first to jump at the opportunity to coddle him soon as his sour lips turn sweet, so what’s with the sudden negativity? the hostile fire that once flickered in his eyes was now replaced by a mournful sadness, and scara couldn’t help but feel like he was staring at a stranger.
his chest tightened in a way that didn’t feel good, and he found himself swallowing thickly, eyes flicking downward to where your hands swirled an ice-filled glass. guilt nipped at scara’s conscience, and he scrubbed a hand over his face, letting out a heavy sigh.
“what did i fucking do wrong now?” he spits out.
scara tends to take even the slightest joke within your relationship as a direct threat or dig at him. not because he doesn’t trust you, not even because he thinks your relationship isn’t at a secure stage — but just because that’s all he knows. he doesn’t know how to respond to something lighthearted when all that he’s felt so far in his life is extremities.
“hm? what do you mean?” you ask, the teasing tone you took on dwindling upon the quick glance at how his bottom lip jutted out nervously. did everything have to be so irrevocably complicated?
scara shook his head, exhaling a small sigh before he just let the matter drop naturally. he didn’t have time for stuff like this. he’d like to think he knows you well enough to recognise when you’re simply teasing him, but that fact alone isn’t enough to make that ache in his heart go away.
he just needs a minute break. and perhaps for you to sneak into bed with him so you can cuddle him from behind.
LYNEY — 林尼
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
it’s a little difficult for lyney to say the words “i love you” to someone who’s not technically part of his family. he trusted and loved you easily, you cared for his siblings as if they were your own and even gave up your own pride to protect him; but something itching within him tells him he has no right to confess his true ardour.
lyney is nothing but a pawn with a jesters hat, using sleight of hand to remove the idea that he’s deceptive from your mind with a few whimsical flower tricks. it’s hard to allow himself to be so vulnerable and open when he knows full well that if his father found out, the disappointment would be greater than the reward.
when he’s coated in that black circus show getup, his smile broad and stance wide with confidence, he’ll reply pretty easily! after all, he had to please his audience. but, you’re not just a stranger in the crowd. you’re his beloved, someone he waits for before one of his grandeur shows as you press a kiss to his cheek as a lucky charm that he finds himself gently touching as he slowly enters the stage.
but when he’s merely lyney, a lonely kid from the house of hearth who trembles in the comfort of the dark, your mumble of: “i love you a lot, lyney,” makes him replywith a mere widened look as if a deer caught in headlights, his pale face blossoming into a rosey pink hue as he tugged down at the front of his hat to cover his eyes.
“me too.” sometimes that reply is easier and much safer for both his heart and yours than the actual words.
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
lyney adores how easily you find yourself saying such a phrase, even a little jealous at time at both the idea of how many people you’ve uttered it to and the fact he finds himself stumbling over his own consciousness at the idea of confessing his affections back.
he’s also a massive trickster! you pull silly and harmless pranks on each other constantly, from something dumb like switching out a singular chocolate chip cookie to a raisin one to see the astounded look on lyney’s face as he bites down to something a little more sweet like lyney throwing out roses to an audience that coincidentally create a heart.
this is certainly a much crueller prank than any of the above.
lyney was a little jumpy backstage, constantly pacing back and forth with a genuine smile on his face that you’ve rarely seen, his arms constantly stretching out in front of him as he played with the leather of his gloves tediously. lady furina was going to be watching him today, it was no wonder he wanted you to help out!
well, lynette did everything, but you’re here for something lyney said he absolutely couldn’t go without. his good luck kiss.
hearing the familiar sound of the staff shuffling around their props, lyney sauntered to you with a smile as his lips tucked behind his arms innocently. “ma moitié,” lyney hums in a chipper, melodic tune, content at simply seeing your face light up once your eyes meet his, “i’m confident in my abilities as a magician, but i think you have the answer to quelling any of my nerves. care to share some of your magic wit me?”
you grin and tilted your head off to the side, giving him an encouraging thumbs up and a much less motivating: “break leg, lyney, i believe in you.” as much as he wished to coax it out of you, he’d have to unfortunately settle for the way you leaned in to press a kiss to his cheek.
yet, although he preformed flawlessly per usual, his execution even enthralling the ever critical furina who sat up in the crowd with a leg over her knee, you notice a slight hesitation in his movements, a brief moment of distraction that only you, who knows him so well, could catch. the show eventually concludes to thunderous applause, lyney and lynette taking their final bow as he nearly sprints off once the curtains draw closed.
backstage, as the crowd's cheers still echo faintly, lyney cautiously approaches you with a more serious expression. “[name],” he begins, his tone quieter, more introspective, “did I... do something wrong?”
who knew just the slight lower pitch of someone’s voice could make your heartstrings tug unceremoniously. you know it's time to end this silly prank. shaking your head, you take a step closer. “no, lyney. you were incredible, as always — lady furina seemed exceptionally impressed.” his breath catches in his throat — that’s not really what he wanted to hear. but before he could brush it all off, you interrupt his overthinking: “and... I love you too.”
his eyes widen in surprise, then soften with relief and warmth. “you really had me there,” he chuckles, pulling you into a hug. “you're quite the trickster yourself.”
you laugh, hugging him back tightly. “i learned from the best.”
NEUVILLETTE — 那维莱特
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
ʚ for neuvillette it’s less about him not saying i love you, but just how convoluted and complicated he can make it seem.
ʚ whether it’s by using outdated poetry and reciting it to you without the knowledge that the terms used completely flew over your head because they’re so old, or doing something that to him is basically more intimate than physical touch like gifting you a piece of jewellery that’s imbedded with a stone most certainly toxic to humans (he got it out of a rift from khaenri’ah when it first emerged and kept it as a little token).
ʚ this man is a dragon, he’s older than the snowy mountains of dragonspine and the deadly primordial sea itself…you can’t blame him for being a little bit over the top and traditional with how he says he loves you.
ʚ it’s all courting tactics! isn’t this what you humans enjoy? no? …maybe he should ask lady furina if she has some plays from the romance genre she’d care to share, perhaps then he could learn a much more modern way of showing his affections.
ʚ he’ll say he loves you if you vocalise you’d just prefer that but…are you sure you don’t also want this embarrassingly cute cup he made to match his dragon form?
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
the more he thinks about it, the sadder he gets. and the sadder he gets, the rainier the heavens become. neuvillette’s pen shifted between several of his fingers as the paragraphs in front of him shifted and blurred continuously.
you didn’t reply to his i love you this morning. straight after waking up he mumbled the sweetest, “i love you,” directly into your ear with that rumbling voice of his, letting his affections linger on your skin as his nose snuggled itself safely against your neck.
and what did he get in response? a small giggle and a, “should we get ready?”
at first, he merely internalised it as a mere misstep on your part. perhaps you merely didn’t hear him, you had just woken up after all you must’ve been feeling a little groggy. that managed to ease his nerves just a little, but soon as you closed the door to his office without a chance for another i love you, he slumped into his seat with defeat.
you humans are tricky creatures and scarily good at making other overthink things that someone should be most confident on.
just the idea that he might’ve done something to upset you enough for you to not want to love him so dearly as you normally do makes the skies weep to match the mourning in his heart. you best come back this instant with your arms wide open unless you want fontaine to flood over.
he may be one of the strongest beings currently alive and awake in the land of teyvat, but his heart is rather fragile when it comes to you.
WRIOTHESLEY — 莱欧斯利
꒰ him not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
much to the dismay of wriothesley, he rarely even gets to say he loves you. between managing the fortress of meropide and his countless responsibilities that range from being a guinea pig for sigewinne’s new test trials that she calls food to ridiculous requests from inmates, expressing his feelings often takes a backseat.
you, of course, understand his position, but it doesn't stop you from sending him love letters whenever you can. your letters are filled with warmth, affection, and little anecdotes about your day, hoping they bring a smile to his face during his busy hours — and they certainly do, he adores tracing your handwriting with the back of his gloved hand.
unfortunately, your letters piled up on his desk without being read. despite him desperately wanting to respond to every little i love you, he found himself way too preoccupied with other immediate matters that required his thorough attention. every time he’d open up his drawer to find a new pen to fill out a document with, he’d shamefully glance at the stack of unread papers that were littered with hearts.
each letter was one a piece of your heart — him stashing it away protectively would be a little romantic and rather ironic given his profession, but currently it felt more like he was actively giving you the sentence of a lifetime by withdrawing his affections.
no reply comes for days.
you understand that his duties are overwhelming, but a part of you yearns for some acknowledgment, a sign that your words are reaching him. however, wriothesley is determined to rectify this, he sat down at his desk after the first calm night in a while, pulls out a sheet of paper, and begins to write.
what you receive the next day isn’t necessarily anything grandiose or swooningly romantic — but it was enough; a large bouquet of your favourite roses with a special heart shaped note attached that when you latched it off simply read: “i love you too, sweetheart.”
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
alas, wriothesley finally managed to carve out a free day just for you. spending the day together ultimately meant either a completely lazy morning filled with sloppy kisses shared and your warm bodies all tangled within blankets, or a date where you bask in each other’s presence.
this time, you chose the latter. you needed a little bit of a pick me up and what better than having a romantic outing with your beloved? …where you simultaneously wished to entertain yourself with a bit of mischief. who could get away with teasing the mighty duke if not you?
a day of activities left you a little exhausted, which is why wriothesley decided to share the last few setting hours of the sun by sitting on a comfy blanket near an empty, secluded beach far from the usual hustle and bustle of fontaine.
"thank you for being so patient with me," wriothesley said, his voice low and sincere. "i know it's not easy, but you mean a lot to me."
you reached out and squeezed his hand. "aww, i understand, wrio. i’m honestly just happy we get to spend time together like this at all.”
bringing your interlocked hands up to his lips, his calloused and rough ones ridden with scars and marks that told stories of their own holding yours as if made of porcelain, he pressed a few gentle kisses to your knuckles as he mumbled a sincere: “i love you, [name].”
ah the very words you’ve been waiting to drawl from his lips. stifling a chuckle, you simply smiled and nodded, letting your hand wiggle away from his grasp as your focus drifted to stare at the crashing waves cleansing the shore.
wriothesley's brow furrowed slightly, a flicker of confusion crossing his face. "did you hear me?" he asked, trying to keep his tone light. "i said, i love you."
you nodded again, keeping your expression neutral. “i heard you."
his confusion turned into amusement as both his brows raised in disappointment — were you seriously teasing him right now? wriothesley leaned in appetisingly close, searching your face for a clue for your intentions. "and?" he prompted.
swallowing down another fit of giggles, you titled your head at him all coyly, “and what?”
wriothesley puffed out a chuckle before his skilled hand quickly swooped beneath your knees and atop the small of your back to land you on his lap. “do you think you’re funny?” his muscular and scarred arms closed around your middle, keeping you firmly in place to face your trial.
“a little,” you muse before lifting yourself a little within his grasp, moving in to press a more than welcomed kiss on his cheek. “i love you too, wrio.”
“that’s what i thought.”
ARLECCHINO — 阿蕾奇诺
꒰ her not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
ʚ arlecchino loves you, she really does. but unfortunately for you, you’re not the age of the orphaned children she protects and therefore she finds it useless to constantly reassure you of such a fact.
ʚ surely if you want her to prove how much she loves you, you’d be less childish with it and simply ask for a real heart to be displayed in a glass box? she’s kidding (perhaps), but given the nature of your dynamic, she’s sure you’ve said the words “i love you” in this relationship enough to cover her half of the bargain.
“arle, i love you,” you muse, buzzing around her desk like a never satiated mosquito. yet instead of sucking blood you merely made her wish she had the heart to plug her ears to silence your relentless affection spillage. she wouldn’t dare. but for the love of the tsaritsa won’t you be good and just sit on her lap and remain quiet?
“arlechinnoo…” another whine as you carefully sit yourself on her desk, her pen quickly brushing over lines, the ferocity at which she held it made the point look as if she was scabbing the paper.
“yes, bunny?” she looked off to the side at you, her expression holding an air of royalty that was most likely non existent in her blood, but definitely seemed present in the way she held herself. maybe it was just that natural posture of arrogance?
“i love you…won’t you love me back?”
“my dear,” she placed the pen down and got up, a sight that made the two informants that stood opposite of the room with their heads hung low nervously hunch into themselves. she sauntered to you and encased your body against the edge of the desk, hands on either side of you.
“you’re surely irritating our guests with your constant noise,” that crestfallen expression of yours was something she wished she could wipe, but that sinful, pyre of pride burned within her like vengeance, making her merely tap her hand over your cheek to refocus your forlorn attention.
soon as you tilted your head, her hot breathy whisper mumbled against your ear: “stay quiet and i’ll be sure to spoil you.”
꒰ you not saying i love you back ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ ⊹
“i’ve been issued another task within fontaine, do keep yourself out of trouble even though i have little hope you’ll commit,” arlecchino teasingly mused as she nudged your hip with hers while fixing her coat. “i love you, dear — i’ll be sure to send you letters.”
arlecchino is eerily fond of the silence that came after deafening screams. the scarlet stickiness that spreads across her grim face in splatters making her instinctively lick off that sweet residue. but right now, the silence was just a testament to how good she’s been treating you.
if you think you can get away with a silly prank like this as she’s awaiting your response like a puppy begging for a bone, you must’ve forgotten who has the collar and who has the leash.
catching your chin between her thumb and forefinger, she tilts your face upwards to meet her intense stare, stern eyes blazing with naked hunger. "i asked you to not cause trouble while i’m gone, but you’ve already decided to start, have you?”
most people would crumble beneath her shimmering eyes that spoke volumes of violence, yet deeply within your own heart you know she’d carry you over mountains of skulls that crushed beneath her callous heels if it meant getting you across into fairyland.
“admit it - you crave me just as fiercely as i burn for you." she grins before flicking your forehead with her clawed fingertips. “don’t make me repeat myself or you won’t be getting any gifts from me when i return.”
that’s the real threat you were waiting for. leaving a featherlight goodbye kiss atop her lips, you smartly respond: “i love you too, and don’t forget my favourite cake!”
she rolls her eyes, finally letting you go. “wouldn’t dream of it.”
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foldingfittedsheets · 11 months ago
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I worked retail for a long time and people really do treat you like shit sometimes. But between selling sex toys, mattresses, and jewelry I can say definitively I got treated worst selling mattresses.
All three of my jobs were in sales but selling sex toys we were allowed to put people in their place, and in jewelry people didn’t want to misbehave in a fancy setting. But people at the mattress store had no problem yelling at me, hitting on me, or insulting me to my face.
For a while I was managing my own store for the company. I ran a small location and had struggling employees placed with me for rehabilitation. If their numbers improved they could go back to bigger stores. If not, they got fired.
So this meant I was the manager of problem employees. At one point both of my people had a foot out the door. The company was going downhill and changed computer systems and they were fed up. Consequently, they made a ton of mistakes, because they just didn’t care about the job or learning the new systems.
I strolled into work on what was essentially my Monday to a shit show. Deliveries scheduled without product, wrong things on orders, poor expectations of the process, you name it. I spent the entire morning getting yelled at for mistakes that weren’t mine.
The final straw came when a man called furious that his moms bed for her nursing home had a delivery window he couldn’t accommodate. This wasn’t a huge disaster since we still had time to deliver it before she moved. I ran him through the options and he just kept screaming at me. Not for a solution but because I was there and he was frustrated.
My heart filled with malice and a cold fury. A calculating part of my brain had a realization in that moment that I could stay a punching bag or I could strike back.
I quavered my voice delicately, taking in a shaky, warbling breath like I was trying not to cry. “Sir,” I quivered through fake tears, “I don’t know what you want from me! I told you what I can do, I didn’t make this mistake I’m just trying to fix it!” My voice broke pitifully on the last syllables, sounding in all ways like a sweet innocent person being yelled at who’s just trying her best, really!
It was like I’d doused him with cold water. My emotional act was the realization that he was screaming at someone who was just doing their damn job, and he was being an asshole. He hastily made an excuse and hung up.
I had a third employee covering with me from another store that day who heard everything. When I hung up, I looked over to see them watching me with an awed expression. “Did… did you just pretend to cry?”
“I absolutely fucking did,” I said with feeling, “and I’d do it a thousand more times. If that’s what it takes for someone to realize they’re behaving like a fucking prick, they deserve it.” The employee looked at me like I was their hero.
The man called back, apologizing profusely, having magically arranged his schedule to accommodate delivery. He came in later that week with an apology Starbucks gift card. I was gracious in my acceptance.
I pulled it a few more times before leaving the company. I felt no shame in the ruse. If someone behaves so poorly that it’s plausible their behavior would drive someone to tears they deserve to feel absolutely wretched about it.
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vroom--vrooming · 25 days ago
Text
Lando Norris x Girlfriend!Reader
Summary: Lando is an idiot, oh and he also lost the key to your house
Requested? No
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The room is dark and silent as you sleep, snuggled under your favorite blanket, sleeping. It's past midnight when you faintly hear a noise. A clatter, followed by a muffled curse. Your eyes snap open.
Your heart pounds as you sit up in bed. Is that... someone in the house? Panic sets in.
Frantically, your eyes scan the room for a weapon. Anything will do. Finally, you grab your bedside lamp. It’s not exactly a baseball bat, but it’s heavy and wieldy enough to knock out a potential thief. Lamp in hand, you cautiously tiptoe toward the kitchen, every creak in the floorboards making you wince.
The noise is louder now. Someone is moving around, rummaging. You grip the lamp tighter, raise it over your head, and step into the kitchen.
“Stop right there!” you yell.
“AHHH!” the intruder screams, dropping something on the counter.
“AHHH!” you scream back, shocked that the "thief" is screaming too.
Both of you stand frozen, staring at each other in the dim light. You recognize the messy curls and wide-eyed look of terror before you.
“Lando?!” you gasp, lowering the lamp.
“Babe, don’t kill me!” Lando exclaims, hands in the air like he’s about to be arrested. “Put the lamp down!”
“What are you doing sneaking around my kitchen at night?!” you demand, lowering the lamp but still holding it firmly. “You scared me half to death!”
“I lost the key you gave me!” he blurts out, looking like a guilty puppy. “I didn’t want to wake you, so I thought I’d...you know...climb in through the window.”
“You climbed through my window?” you echo, incredulous. “Who even does that?!”
“I do, apparently,” he mutters, still eyeing the lamp nervously. “Can you, uh, put that down before you actually swing it at me?”
Realizing you’re still holding the lamp like a weapon, you set it on the counter with a huff. “You’re unbelievable.”
“I know,” he says, trying to muster a sheepish grin. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“You didn’t just scare me—you terrified me!” you scold. “What if I had actually hit you with this thing?”
“Well,” he says, scratching the back of his neck, “I guess I’d be knocked out, and you’d be dating a guy with a concussion.”
You roll your eyes but can’t help the small laugh that escapes. “This isn’t funny, Lando. You lost the key! What if someone else finds it?”
“I’ll fix it,” he says quickly. “I’ll change the locks tomorrow. First thing in the morning.”
“You’d better,” you say, crossing your arms. “And you’re paying for it!”
“Of course,” he says, nodding eagerly. “Anything you want. Just don’t attack me with lamps anymore.”
You shake your head, still annoyed but starting to soften. Then he grins and points at you.
“By the way,” he says, “you look really hot in my papaya hoodie.”
You glance down, realizing you’re wearing his oversized hoodie. “Don’t think compliments are going to get you out of this,” you say, trying to sound stern.
“Oh, come on,” he says, stepping closer and wrapping his arms around you. “I mean it. You look amazing.”
“Flattery will only get you so far,” you tease, but the corners of your mouth twitch upward.
“It’s working, though, isn’t it?” he asks, kissing your forehead.
You sigh, giving in. “Fine. You’re forgiven... but only because of the hoodie.”
“Noted,” he says, grinning. “And I’ll keep my promise about the locks. No more sneaky window missions, I swear.”
“Good,” you say, finally relaxing in his arms. “Next time, just call. I’d rather wake up to a phone than almost attack you with a lamp.”
“Deal,” Lando laughs, holding you tighter.
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shawtuzi · 3 months ago
Text
STRETCH YOU OUT
pairing: ex boyfriend! toji x reader/// cw include: porn with plot, toji is pathetic but in a hot way, a little angst, oral f receiving, good ole make up sex, really really soft sex that eventually gets rough, unprotected sex, breeding kink, creampie obvi, a smidge of aftercare, rushed but happy ending!! edit: i finally proofread this i didn’t realize there were so many mistakes so sorry bout that!!
˚ʚ♡ɞ
“y/nnnn! baby please talk to me! i see you looking at through the curtain!” you jumped back, closing the curtain with quickness. you rubbed your temples, letting out a deep sigh.
toji was back trying to win your forgiveness. again. for the third time that week.
after a very heated argument that involved him calling you a bitch you sent that man packing, not even looking back as you slammed the door in his face.
toji could be a good boyfriend when he felt like it, which was a problem for you. you wanted stability, someone you could depend on, have children with—but you just weren’t sure toji wanted the same thing. his promises felt empty, like he was only saying it to make you happy and that’s what pissed you off more than anything. him calling you a bitch was just the icing on top of the worlds shittiest cake
you could still remember the look of shock on his face as you told him to get the fuck on and never come back.
yet here he was for the third night in a row—sitting outside your apartment blasting ‘fallin’ by alicia keys from his car with the most beat up looking bouquet of flowers you’ve ever seen in his arms.
you suddenly heard a loud knock at your door, making you jump. you looked through the peephole, sighing when you saw your neighbor suguru, a very agitated look on his face.
“can i help you?” you asked cracking the door open, already knowing he was about to give you an earful about toji.
“this is the third time that guy has shown up here blasting that loud ass music, and he keeps yelling your name. you gonna do something about?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow. you kissed your teeth, opening the door wider, “i don’t know what the hell you expect me to do? he’s a grown ass man—”
“a grown ass man that has ties to you! fix it y/n or i won’t be so nice asking next time—” geto was cut off by you slamming the door in his face, letting out a sound of surprise. “bitch…” he muttered, walking back to his apartment.
you sighed once more, letting your forehead fall against the door. “fucking toji,” you growled, pushing off the door, walking over the window where you were watching toji. you yanked open the curtains, met once again with sight of toji belting out whatever r&b song was playing in his car.
you opened the window, sticking your head out the slightest bit. “y/n, baby! you came back!” he let out a sound of relief. you shook your head in annoyance, “turn that shit off and go home toji,” you hissed, making him frown and shake his head. you narrowed your eyes at the man, giving him the best death glare you could manage.
although you did put a little fear in his body, toji stood his ground, taking it a step further by turning up the stereo in his car. “i’m not leaving till we talk and baby you know i got time,” he glared right back at you, smirking because he knew that you knew he was indeed right. your nostrils flared in anger, your fist closing up ready to straight up punch this man in his jaw.
“ugh fine just turn that shit off before anyone complains,” you slammed your window shut, irritation radiating off every inch of your body. wow did this man had a lot of fucking nerve, but it’s okay you were ready to let him have it the second he stepped into your apartment.
it didn’t take long for toji to make it to your apartment, breathless and jittery but nonetheless excited to finally be in your presence again. you slowly opened the door, a frown etched onto your pretty, plump lips.
“hi baby….can i come in?” you didn’t say anything, instead you just stepped aside allowing him into the warmth of your apartment. the smell of caramel and honey hit his nose, relaxing him the tiniest bit.
it was silent for a few moments, no one saying anything until toji finally broke the silence. “before you go off on me just hear me out okay? sit. please,” toji ushered you over to the couch, his heart tightening when you shook his touch off.
“you know i don’t think you’re no bitch right? i’m sorry i even said it i hope we can move past it…” you looked at him, your brows furrowing, waiting for him to continue with his “apology”. when nothing else was said you couldn’t help but shake your head and laugh.
“toji…you think i kicked you out all because you called me a bitch….nothing else?” you were laughing but nothing was funny and that’s what was freaking toji the fuck out. he didn’t say anything which was just pissing you off even more.
“i kicked your ass out because i don’t even know what we’re doing anymore toji! you come and go as you please, you don’t talk to me and i mean really talk to me about shit like our future or if you even see a future with me. this relationship feels one sided whether you believe it and i’m sick of it—i don’t even believe you anymore whenever you say you love me. you haven’t touched me in god knows how long— *hiccup*
you hadn’t even realized you started crying till you felt little salty droplets fall on your thighs. you squeezed your eyes shut, bowing your head down as you tried to control your breathing.
“an—and now you got me fucking c-crying and shit—i hate you, i hate you so much,” you wiped your tears with the back of your hand but they just kept falling. toji’s eyes were wide as he watched you cry—over him of all fucking people. his chest felt impossibly tight, his throat feeling as if it would close up any minute.
you suddenly jumped up, “are you even gonna say anything?!” the volume of your voice took him by surprise, making him flinch. toji quickly stood up, resting his hands on your shoulders but you only pushed him away. toji took a deep breath, muttering out a small ‘sorry’ before pulling you into his arms.
“let go of me toji, jus’ leave,” but toji only shushed your cries, hugging you to his chest tighter—not tight enough to hurt you of course. he pressed multiple kisses to the crown of your head, rocking the two of you side to side while you silently cried into his shirt.
he cracked the tiniest smile when he finally felt you clutch onto his shirt, your nose nuzzling more into his chest. “just breathe and listen to me okay?” toji waited for you to verbally answer before speaking once more.
“i do love you y/n, there is no one else for me but you. it’s just—whenever you talk about that stuff i get scared shitless. i never pictured myself as the husband type or the dad type until just recently and even then i feel like id be shit at it. then you’d eventually realize you could do better n’ leave me,” he said the last part so quietly you almost didn’t hear it. panic washed over toji’s face when you began to cry harder.
“that’s why you need to talk to me, if i would’ve known it spooked you i wouldn’t have kept pushing the idea,” you were so annoyed at him, but you definitely couldn’t ignore the way your heart swelled at his words. toji rested his cheek on the crown of your head, shutting his eyes, “i’m a fucking idiot. the biggest fucking idiot there ever were.”
“yeah you are,” you let out a tiny laugh, lifting your head up to get a good look at toji. his eyes were sad and cloudy, something you’ve never seen before, it made you wanna start bawling your eyes out all over again.
“i’m sorry baby, forgive me. please.” he pressed his forehead against yours, frowning when you wouldn’t meet his gaze. “why won’t you look at me? look at me please y/n.” still nothing.
you let out a noise of surprise when toji suddenly fell on his knees, his big hands clutching onto the soft fabric of your his pajama pants. you finally made eye contact with him, your eyes already brimming with hot tears once more.
“forgive me. i’ll do anything—anything you ask of me. just let me come back and love you the right way—the way i should’ve been doing all this time,” he wrapped his arms around your waist, burying his face in softness of your tummy. you ran your fingers through his hair, little hums of content leaving toji’s lips.
“fine. i forgive you toji.”
toji tilted his head up, his lips curling into a sad smile. you smiled back at him, giving his forehead three kisses before pushing him back. “now get your ass up you have a lot of making up to do,” you made your way to your bedroom, shedding your clothes on the way.
toji’s mouth was dropped in awe, his dick already twitching at the thought of finally being inside you again. he stood up on shaky legs, his eyes immediately locking on your discarded panties. he snatched them up and shamelessly took a look sniff, his eyes closing in utter bliss.
“what a fucking woman.”
“toji! bring your ass.”
“coming!”
˚ʚ♡ɞ
“a-ah! tojiii,” you mewled, yanking on toji’s jet black locks as he tongue fucked your pussy with everything he had in him. he had your knees pushed to your chest, securing them both with his large hands.
toji moaned into your pussy, swaying his head back and forth as he slurped up every drop you had to offer him. “s’fuckin’ good,” he slurred into your pussy, his dick jumping in his pants when he felt a gush of your wetness his his tongue.
he pushed his tongue into your clenching hole once more, his nose bumping into your clit each time his head moved. your toes curled in ecstasy as your second orgasm washed over you. “goddamn baby you tryna baptize me?” toji chuckled, giving your pussy three quick slaps.
“fuck you,” you mewled in overstimulation when you felt toji shove two fingers in your pussy, curling them just right. toji kissed his way up your body, stopping to give you a sloppy kiss.
“i intend to but i gotta stretch you out first if i wanna fit all the way in,” toji hummed, adding a third finger, his thumb quickly finding your clit to ease the stretch. you wrapped your arms around his neck, your whines and whimpers sounding like a symphony in his ears.
“feels so good toji,” you sighed dreamily, pressing your manicured toes against his hard on. toji hissed, his teeth catching onto his bottom lip hard enough to draw blood. “s’about to feel even better honey, open your legs,” toji swiftly removed his fingers from your cunt, a deep groan rumbling in his chest watching the way you clenched around nothing.
he pulled his sweats low enough for his dick to spring out but that wasn’t enough for you. “everything. take it all off, w’nna feel you against me,” your voice was so sweet and gentle compared to how it was earlier. it brought his heart so much peace knowing your words towards him were no longer full of anger and annoyance.
toji obeyed your wishes and removed everything. he pulled your body to the edge of the bed, pushing your knees to your chest once more. he tapped his dick against your pussy, fighting the urge to bust already just from how fucking wet your pussy sounded.
“ready for me baby?” his tone was soft as he slowly pushed the tip in. you nodded, your breath hitching when he pushed more in. it stayed like that for a moment—toji softly praising you as he slowly pushed all eight and a half inches of him inside you.
there we go—hah!” you both gasped in unison when he pushed himself in to the hilt. you feet knocked against his back, your body squirming at the feeling of being completely stuffed. “too big toji! it’s too much!” you tried to control you breathing you really did, but the way you could feel the thick veins on him throbbing against your walls had your mind already scrambled.
toji took in a long breath, attempting to get his thoughts together. this was about you not him. he was determined to make you see stars.
“you can take it baby—i know you can take it. gonna take me like a good girl like all those other times yeah? you wanna make me proud don’t you?” his thumbs caressed at your cheeks as he whispered sweet nothings in your ear. he finally felt your pussy ease up, allowing him to draw his hips back, then forward.
your eyes rolled into the back of your head, mouth dropping open as toji fucked you with every ounce of love he had to offer. “fell s’good around me baby, kept this pussy nice and tight for me. you knew i’d be back didn’t you?” both his strong arms caged your head, blocking you from seeing anything in the room but him. toji drew his hips back all the way before slamming back in, hissing when he felt your manicured fingers dig into his biceps.
“a-answer me y/n, answer me right now or m’gonna fucking pull out,” it was an empty threat, you both knew that, but that didn’t stop you from scrambling to find the words to answer him. “yessss yes i knew you’d be back! i— ah my god! i w-was waiting for an excuse to let you come in and i’m so hap—happy it happened!” even though your brain told itself multiple times to not let this man back into your life you heart was saying a whole nother thing. of course love always triumphs which is why toji’s got you folded like a damn pretzel, fucking into you so hard your body was sliding up the bed.
˚ʚ♡ɞ
“thas’ right baby take that fucking dick, take my cum so i can make you a pretty mommy,” toji growled pushing your face further into your pillows, drool and tears falling freely onto the soft cotton.
you’d lost track of how many rounds you’ve gone, your brain sounding like nothing but static. your hands that were once pushing against toji’s pelvis to slow his movements were now pinned to your back. you were filled with so much cum you almost felt bloated, but you didn’t care—not when toji was making the sweetest promises about making you a mother.
each time he came inside you he pushed any excess back into your spent pussy, and each time his dick got hard causing him to beg you for yet another round that you simply couldn’t refuse. this time around though you could tell he was tired, the way his thrusts went from sloppy to straight up grinding, the way he wasn’t even trying to contain his moans anymore—my mans was tired okay.
“i’m—i’m gonna cum again daddy, feels like a lot,” you clutched onto your pillow for dear life, your knees feeling like they were about to give out any second. one particular roll of his hips finally triggered your orgasm, making your eyes cross and your legs finally give out from beneath you.
that didn’t stop toji in fact it even encouraged him to be rougher, his thighs clapping against the backs of yours they were turning a light shade of pink. “f-fuck are you still fucking cumming? you’re soaking me doll,” he grunted, mesmerized by the way waves of cum leaked from your pussy each time he pulled out.
with one last thrust toji finished inside you with a deep groan, his chest rumbling against your back. toji sat back on his knees, whistling at the way his cum flooded out of your swollen pussy, staining your sheets even more. he kissed his way up your back, stopping at your neck to litter it with wet kisses.
“you okay mama?” he laid next you, pulling your limp body into his arms. you couldn’t respond—like actually you were entirely too fucking tired, so you settled on a loving pat on his chest along with a kiss to his jaw. toji chuckled, tilting his head to give your forehead three kisses.
as you dozed off to sleep in his arms toji took this time to admire you in your relaxed state. that furrow between your brows was no longer there, along with that oh so cute pout you were sporting when he first came inside your apartment.
“i’m gonna do right by you i promise y/n, i promise.”
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selineram3421 · 11 months ago
Note
can I make a request for an Alastor x reader? Where y/n is Husk's sibling and Alastor won't stop flirting with y/n and Husk is just not having it? (And the rest of the HH crew are just in the background shipping Alastor and y/n)
*swipes up* Cat Demon Reader!!!! FUCK YEAH!
Hissy Kitty
Prologue
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Alastor X Reader
Warnings⚠
⚠ cussing, protective older brother Husk, Alastor loves annoying your brother, italics = thoughts ⚠
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Husk was very protective of you and made sure you were taken care of. In Living and afterlife, he kept you out of his "business" to keep you safe.
Of course you surprise him by showing up at the hotel.
"What the fuck are you doing here!?"
"Surprise!", you cheered and gave your older brother a hug.
He didn't want you anywhere near his work. It was too risky. You would have been made a target. He didn't want HIM to know about you.
"Answer the question.", he grumbled but hugged you back.
"I haven't seen you in a while and I just wanted to-", you began, pulling back a bit from the hug, taking a look around the hotel lobby that was behind him.
"Look, I'll call you and tell you all about it but you need to go before-", he tried to get you to leave quickly.
"Husker!"
Shit.
He was pissed that he was too late.
"What are you doing trying to chase a guest out?", the demon in red walked over and pulled you into the hotel. "We are trying to invite them in."
"This one ain't looking to stay in the hotel!", your brother hissed and tried to pull you away from the red dressed demon.
You were suddenly spun and dipped by the man in red. It shocked you so much that you held onto the red demon tightly.
"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel! I am Alastor the facility manager.", Alastor grinned as he gazed down at you. "And who might you be?"
Such an adorable thing. He thought when seeing your ears pinned back and eyes having turned into slits, his grin widening when he noticed Husk getting angrier.
"Um..can you let me up now? This is a very weird way of greeting..", you squirmed, your tail flicking in annoyance.
After letting you go, Alastor took note of how bristled up the fur of his acquaintance was.
How interesting..
"Forgive me dear, I can get quite theatrical.", he laughed and fixed his bowtie. "And your name?"
"I'm-"
"Not staying.", Husk cut in. "They only came to see me, now back off."
"What the hell, can't I greet a demon?", you huffed.
Your brother pulls you away to speak in private.
"Not this one! This prick is someone I don't want you hanging around with.", he whispered growled, putting his hands on your shoulders. "Go home, put some wards or some shit for protection and don't come back here again!"
"Damn it Husk!", you slapped his hands away. "I came here to check up on you!"
Alastor stays where he is to enjoy the show. Glancing to the side when seeing Angel step into the lobby.
"Its been years! I haven't heard from you until two weeks ago about this place. Where have you been!? Do you know how worried I was!?"
"Psst! Smiles! Who the fuck is kitty whiskers?", the spider asks.
"Haven't the faintest idea but this argument is getting amusing.", he responds.
"I told you that I moved! That should be enough!", Husk gestured to the hotel.
"Yeah, its nice to know you're alive but you could have at least told me how you've been! Did you make any new friends? Did you drink until you blacked out again? Something else for fucks sake!", you yelled.
"I'm alive!", your brother yelled back. "I drank yesterday!", he pushed you towards the door. "I don't have friends!", he opened the door. "Now leave!"
"Tsk tsk!", Alastor tutted and used his shadows to pull you away from the door, moving you into his hold. "They are our guest, even if they are just visiting Husker~"
The Radio Demon's smile growing bigger when he saw the cat clench his fists.
"You are welcome to visit anytime to see this-", the red demon gestures to your brother. "-hissy kitty that you know."
"Ha!", you quickly covered your mouth to keep your laugh silent.
"A smile! Finally!", Alastor leaned closer to you. "I'd like to see it if you don't mind."
"Back off!", Husk pushed the red dressed demon away and took your hand. "Come on, I'll show you around."
"I can stay!?", you asked your brother.
"Only for a few hours!", he replied.
You stayed longer than a few hours.
Charlie had caught wind and was excited to meet you.
Husk drank from his bottle, watching as you talked to the Princess and Vaggie. The two were hooked on whatever story you were telling.
"So Husky~", Angel slid over.
"Don't you fucking call me that ever again.", the cat grumbled before continuing to drink.
"Who's the new cat strolling about?", the spider asked. "I've never seen you so pushy with someone before~ Are they an ex?"
"None of your business and ew. Fuck no.", Husk wiped his mouth after he finished the bottle. "Forget about them. They need to leave anyway.", he said before walking over to you.
.
"Hi Husk!", you waved as you entered the hotel.
"Fucking shit. What did you not understand about staying away!?"
You had a smug grin and pranced over to him.
"Can't really stay away from where I work~", you said and showed your employment papers.
"What.", your brother growled.
"While I was talking to the Princess during the tour, you stepped out for a bit and I told her I wanted to work here!", you beamed, cat tail swaying calmly. "So now I can't leave! Yay!"
"Are you fucking stupid!?", Husk yelled.
"Now Husker.", Alastor appeared from the shadows behind you, placing a hand on your shoulder. "That is no way to talk to your fellow coworker."
The Radio Demon smiled cheekily when seeing the cat demon's fur bristle in anger.
"Let's show you all of the staff rooms!", he said suddenly and turned you towards the stairs. "There are quite a few closets littered about for cleaning supplies! For now that is what you'll do with Niffty until the Princess can think of where to put you."
"Is there any cleaning supplies?", you asked a little suspicious.
"Haven't a clue! But let's find out!"
You were near Alastor most of the day.
Husk actually followed you both until the "tour" ended.
"And that is all of the cleaning closets so far!", the red man grinned.
All of you were now standing in one of the many hallways. The fourth floor if you remember.
"Thank you for pointing them out.", you removed his hand from your shoulder. "Little less of that if you don't mind."
"Oh! I didn't even notice.", Alastor held his hands behind his back. "Do remind me if I slip again."
Husk quickly took you away from the red demon and walked you towards the lobby.
"Look, I'm glad you're here. Really. But its not safe for you to be around that smiling asshole.", your brother hissed.
"Husk, I'm not as clueless as you think I am.", you sigh and shook his arm off. "I'll keep myself safe.", you finish and walk away.
The cat demon stayed behind, groaning as he slides his hand down his face, feeling on edge, tired, and annoyed all at once.
"I've never seen you around a demon like them~", Alastor appears from the shadows. "And you're so protective!", he walks in front of the cat demon. "What a good older brother you are.", he leans back and spins his head to look at the demon.
"Don't you fucking try anything!", Husk threatens.
The Radio Demon laughs and stands up straight. "We'll have to go over our deal again!", he says while fixing his coat. "I hope you added their protection in."
"You piece of shit-!", Husk extends his claws and opens his wings up.
"I must be off! Who knows what trouble the guests have gotten into already!", Alastor walks away from the angry cat.
The Radio Demon hummed as he walked down the hallway, a slight skip in his step as his smile grew wider.
Oh how entertaining~
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I love cats💕 Also this is turning into a short story because Husk is gonna be hella pissed.
~Seline, the person.
Part 1
Taglist@
@ducky-died-inside @scary-noodlesblog @c4rved-pumpk1n @stolas-thebirb @naelys-the-aster @biromanticboba @kiraisastay @pooplyface1423 @lbcreations-blog @gallantys @+?
ML for Alastor🎙 | ChL for HK😾
4K notes · View notes
cutebat · 5 months ago
Text
Yandere Batfam x Neglected, but Defiant Reader
The First Page
Warning(s): Neglect, emotional abuse, physical abuse, mind break (There are no yandere themes yet, but will be in another chapter)
(This chapter is basically the first part of the prologue and some things fixed)
~~~~~
10 years old.
You were only 10 years old when the Gotham's billionaire, Bruce Wayne, entered through the doors of the orphanage that you lived under of.
You could remember the owner holding your hand as she lead you to the man who is going to be your father.
You remember when he placed his hand on your head as he introduced himself to you and promised that he'll give you a great life.
You remember when you came to the manor as he introduced you to your new family that consists of four new older brothers, one new older sister, and a butler.
You remember when everyone would talk to you and welcome you with loving embraces.
You also remember a few days foward when Bruce gave you a costume that resembled a white dress with pink details, which earned you the title of Batgirl.
And after all of that, it's like it never happened.
~~~~~
You are now being ignored by everyone.
Nobody gave you a glance, made excuses, and basically beat the shit out of you. Well, not exactly.
For example, there was one day when you came up to Bruce with a flyer in your hand.
"Um, hi, Bruce... I know you're busy right now, but... I'm going to have a school play and I got the main role. So... I hope you can stop by and watch."
You tell him in the nicest way possible.
However, Bruce was so focused on his paperwork that he didn't give you a glance. All he said was...
"Hm? Yeah, I'll go check it out if I finish all of this."
And suprise, suprise, he never showed up.
This resulted in you crying in the girl's restroom all alone in your costume.
~~~~~
There was also a time when you felt like you needed to train more, so you did it by going up to Dick who seems to be training with Damian.
"Um, guys? Can I join you two?"
You ask as you smile awkwardly as your two older brothers turned to you.
Which is why you became surprised when Dick smiles.
"Sure! But, do you mind if you wait until me and Damian are done with this sparring session? It won't take too long."
He said with a chuckle as Damian looked like he was glaring at his little sister.
You didn't want to be rude, which is why you just nodded before you went over to the corner and watched your brothers train.
As an hour passed, Dick and Damian stopped, which made you take the chance to finally train with them.
However, you seemed confused when you saw the two turning around and walking out of the batcave.
"He-Hey, Dick? I thought you and Damian were going to train with me."
You speak up in a timid tone, which the two clearly heard.
"Oh, about that. Sorry, (name), but we were already planning to go to the cafe for a break. Maybe tomorrow, okay?"
Dick said with an 'apologetic' expression before he leaves with Damian.
Because of this, you never asked him to train with you again.
~~~~~
These were all easily common, but there were some moments when it scarred you.
One time, Tim was basically forced to bring you to a mission along with his friends.
As the patrol went on, you seemed to get distracted a bit when you spotted Conner having some trouble.
Because of this, you left the scene and quickly dived in and fought alongside the teenage Kryptonian. Thanks to you, everything was handled.
Conner thanked you before someone yelled out your name. This made you jolt as you turned to see an angry Tim storming over to you.
Before you can say anything, he cuts you in.
"What on earth were you doing?! I told you to stay where you are, and you just had to ignore everything I say, don't you?!"
He yells as if someone murdered his close family member.
This made you so shocked as Conner was stunned. When Cassie and Bart came over to the spot, they were both shocked to see their friend, yelling at his little sister.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Calm down, Tim. (name) didn't do anything wrong. I was the one who called her over to help me."
Conner defends you, but of course, Tim doesn't listen.
"Don't even try to defend her! She knows what she did! Oh, I am SO going to report this to Batman, so don't even try to cover yourself up!"
Tim said in a frustrated and angry tone towards you before he used his grappling hook and swooped down, leaving you behind with his friends.
"Hey, what the hell, asshole!"
Conner shouts out at his friend as he was shocked to him this angry.
He lets out a sigh before he looks over to see Cassie and Bart, comforting you as you are crying in their arms.
~~~~~
Yelling wasn't the only thing that you had to endure.
You even went through moments when things got a little too... physical.
It all happened when you were just trying to help someone in need.
You were walking down the hallway during the night as you just wanted a cup of water. As you were wandering down the hallway, you noticed some voices from someone's bedroom.
Jason's bedroom.
This made you curious as you got close to the door to hear Jason talking amongst himself as he sat on the edge of his bed.
He kept muttering stuff out of his mouth, which made you worried.
That is when you made a mistake by going inside.
"Jason...? Are you okay?"
You ask in a timid voice.
At that moment, Jason snaps his head towards you before everything starts to go blur. All you remember is him grabbing something like a pole type object before it was brought down towards your head.
And then, you woke up in your own bedroom, except you have a bandage wrapped around your head.
When you sat up, all you saw was Alfred, the family's loyal butler. No sign of your other family around, concerning about you.
Luckily, you recovered, and the wound went away after a month.
And, of course, Jason never apologized for what he did to you.
~~~~~
A few months was in, and no improvement has been made. You were always ignored. They made excuses of not wanting to spend time with you, and some of them actually hit you a few times.
All of that happened to your ten year old self.
But, did you give up on that spot? Nope.
You discovered on the internet what you can do to please your family to gain their attention. There were a lot of results, but the one that kept popping up the most was trying to reach your best achievements, which would result in them showing you more support from them.
And that's what you did.
You started to join in many after-school activities and studied all your might. It was tiring, and you almost passed out from exhaustion, but you kept going because you wanted at least your family to notice you.
The problem is that they never did.
They never congratulated you, celebrated on your accomplishment, and most of all, they didn't even give you a glance when you showed off.
All of that for nothing. Damn.
~~~~~
The breaking point wasn't because of all that. It was when someone else entered the family.
Duke Thomas.
A metahuman teenager whose parents died from the Joker Venom.
You thought that they might treat him the same way that they had treated you.
But, nothing.
Duke was showered with love, attention, and even praise.
The things that you never got when you came here.
Whenever you pass by whatever event that they're holding, you will always see them together. Being all happy, chatting, and laughing with one another.
They never do that when they're around you. Even on your birthdays. Actually, when was the last time they all celebrated your birthday?
At that moment, something inside you just snapped. Like, a loud crack echoes through your head that makes a loud ringing sound, kind of like a wake-up call.
Then, it all clicked.
They never cared about you.
They never even liked you.
The only reason why Bruce adopted you is because nobody wanted to.
~~~~~
The thoughts kept running through your head as you walked into an alleyway with a trash bag in hand.
Earlier today at school, you dropped out the clubs that you absolutely hated and pretty much just purposely laid back in your classes.
You feel empty.
When you finally reach the dumpster, you got on top of some stacked boxes because of your height and open the large lid.
You could only stare inside that had a lot of black colored trash bags. Your eyes were blank as you stared down inside.
That's when you muttered out.
"Why even bother...?"
With that, you tossed the trash bag that you were holding on into the dumpster.
After what it felt like hours, you finally got off of the boxes that you were standing on top of before you walked out of the alleyway.
As you walked away, something fell out of the trash bag that you threw out.
It was a white bat eared helmet.
The accessory that once matched with your costume.
That's right.
You were no longer Batgirl.
You never were, anyway.
Taglist: @somebodyrandom-613 @delias-stuff @endism @ragdol-666 @snowy-violet @sleepydhanie @missikkj @k1ttys-w0rld @box-of-kinderjoy @thetreefairypersonalblog @thelibraryofdeez @animegoddess15
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empresskylo · 1 year ago
Note
can you make a fix of cod guys reaction to you getting into an argument with them, which causes us to flinch and cover our face from any impact because we had an abusive ex.
featuring Ghost, Price, Soap, Gaz, Konig, & Alejandro
⊹ cod men x gn!reader
[ warnings ] domestic violence implications
cod masterlist
Ghost
He’d run his hand through his hair if he didn’t have this bloody mask on. Ghost looked down at you, his eyes narrowing in and scrutinizing your every minute detail. You tried to glare back, but you were feeling rather small with the weight of his disappointed glower. 
“You’ve got t’be more careful,” his voice boomed, though he was trying to keep it at a normal level. 
“I know, I’m sorry—”
“Sorry isn’t gonna cut it when you get someone killed,” he growled, taking a step in, closing the space between the two of you. 
You stepped back on instinct and bumped into the wall—trapped. You suddenly felt trapped. You knew that logically he wouldn’t hurt you, but something about his pissed-off demeanor and towering frame triggered something in you. Your breathing increased exponentially and Ghost watched helplessly as your chest rose and fell in rapid beats.
A bit taken aback by your response, Ghost raised a hand to grab your shoulder and you turned your head and shied away. You let out a small gasp as if waiting for him to land a blow on you. 
You squeezed your eyes shut, the entire moment passing by excruciatingly slow. That’s when you knew you fucked up. Ghost dropped his hand and his fist clenched, putting everything together all at once. Something inside him broke seeing you look at him like that—with fear in your eyes. It fucking hurt.
“M’not gonna hurt you,” he said in a much softer tone than earlier. He’d never lay a hand on you, even out of love, if you didn’t want it.
You blinked rapidly, forcing yourself to look up at him, your face inflamed. “I-I know. I didn’t… I don’t know why…” The words got lost in your throat. You were so embarrassed. 
“Who?” He asked sharply.
You tilted your head, your hands squeezing at your sides. Ghost took a step back to give you room, though he wanted nothing more than to step into you closer, to pull you against him. He didn’t care how annoyed he was with you, all that drifted away, unimportant nonsense he’d come back to later.
“ Who… ?” You repeated.
“Who. Hurt. You?” He bent over slightly, aligning his face with yours as he talked, making sure you couldn’t turn your face away from him. 
“J-Just an ex-boyfriend. It’s not a big deal. I don’t know why I responded like that. I-I know you wouldn’t hurt me.”
Ghost sighed, his eyes dancing between yours. “No. I wouldn’t.” His voice was dark and deep again. “But I have nothin’ against hurtin’ that bastard.”
“Ghost, please.”
He straightened and rolled his shoulders, trying to suppress the bubbling anger. He looked down at you at last. “Can I touch you?” He asked softly.
You nodded, tears falling down your cheeks now. He tentatively took a step towards you and pulled you into his arms. He wrapped them securely around you and you nuzzled your face into his jacket. If he wasn’t so shocked over the way you responded to him, he’d be yelling at you to tell you who it was that hurt you so he could hunt them down. 
Instead, he clutched you close to him, trying not to think about the fear that crossed your eyes, even if it was momentarily. Even if it wasn’t because of him. He never wanted you to look at him like that again. Something rotten tugged at his heart as he felt you try to stifle your cries. Oh, he was definitely going to kill that bastard. And he was going to make it slow and painful.  
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Price
You chased after Price as he made his way down the hall. “I swear I didn’t mean to—!”
He cut you off, spinning on his heels, making you bump into his chest and slam to a halt. “It doesn’t matter what you meant !” He yelled, losing his composure briefly. 
You flinched at his loud words, stepping away from him. It was a quick movement, a subtle tick of your face, your eyes squinted as you pulled your head away. You acted like this was something you were all too familiar with. 
Immediately Price’s anger shifted away from you and onto whatever bastard trained you to cower. 
His widened eyes traced your face and you slowly read his expression as he came to the realization of why you would flinch away from him when he shouted. You watched as several emotions crossed Price’s countenance. 
His voice was hushed as he edged closer to you, the deep baritone sending a shiver up your spine. “Y’don’t have t’tell me now,” his voice was so low as he spoke. “But you will tell me who, eventually.”
“John, I–”
He was always so gentle with you. But right now, the intense hatred for whoever this bastard was that harmed you, took over. He shook his head and clicked his tongue. “Don’t wanna hear it, doll. You will tell me who did this to you if it’s the last thing I get out of you.”
A wave of heat crossed your cheeks, his eyes boring into yours. You nodded meekly and his face softened. “Com’ere,” he cooed, opening his arms. You stepped into them and were immediately surrounded in the warm comfort Price brought you, one hand rubbing circles on your back and the other sliding up into your hair, tucking your head under his chin. 
“S’your not mad at me, anymore?” Your words muffled by his body. 
You felt his chest rumble as he spoke. “Could never stay mad at you.”
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Soap
“Blood hell,” Soap whined, annoyed with you for hiding the arm wound you got the other day. 
“It’s not as serious as it looks,” you tried to convince him, your lips quirking into a weak smile. 
He closed his eyes to collect his last remaining patience. “Not serious—” he repeated, his words rising in several octaves as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “You’ve got twenty stitches in your arm! How the fuck is that not serious?!” 
He reached for your arm and you pulled it away, shuddering briefly from the brief touch of his fingertips. The two of you froze, his eyes darting to meet yours the second he saw the shift in your composure. 
“Gonna tell me why y’just did that?” He sat still in his seat, trying to steady his voice. 
“Did what?” You asked, attempting to play dumb, but the tears were already misting in your eyes. 
Soap sighed, his face dropping as he studied you. “Fuckin’ hell,” he said with displeasure. “You shoulda told me. I wouldn’t have—I woulda been more—” He lost his words, watching as a few stray tears fell down your cheeks. 
“Hey, hey, hey,” he said softly. His thumb came up to wipe the tears away, his hand then cupping the side of your cheek. “S’okay. M’not mad.” You leaned into his hand.. “Jus’ wish ya woulda told me.” You nodded and he gave you a weak smile. 
“Com’on, let’s get that bandage changed.” His voice was gentle as he coaxed you up, wrapping an arm protectively around you as he led you down to the infirmary. You would discuss this later. Right now, all he wanted was to make sure you felt safe in his arms.
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Gaz
Gaz wouldn’t say he had anger issues… he just got passionate about the people he cared about, and sometimes that would come out in spurts of angry shouts. What he didn’t expect, was the way you reacted the first time he ever lost his cool in front of you. 
“I cannot fuckin’ believe Shepherd,” he growled. 
“Maybe we should just focus on the positive,” you said meekly, trying to help calm Gaz down.  
“Yeah? And what fuckin’ positive is that?!” He shouted as he paced back and forth. He regretted it the moment it left his lips. 
You squeezed your eyes shut at his words and brought your hands up for the briefest of seconds to cover your face. 
Gaz whispered your name and you instantly tried to compose yourself. You straightened and gave an awkward smile.
“That wasn’t at you,” he corrected, his eyes deflating as he watched you. “I-I’m sorry. I’d never hurt you,” he said wistfully, running his hand over his hair and cursing. He looked at you completely differently than he had just moments earlier. His entire demeanor shifted. He was suddenly staring at you with such intensity it made something well in your eyes. 
“No, Gaz. It’s not you.” That was the last sentence you could get out before the tears escaped. You quickly wiped them away and Gaz stepped towards you, resting both hands on either one of your shoulders. 
“Hey,” he said calmly. 
You gave him a sideways smile. “It’s just…” you tried to get the words out but they slipped away.
“S’alright. You don’t have to tell me.” His hands slid down your arms, giving you a squeeze before releasing you. “You know I’d never hurt you, right?”
You gave a small laugh. “I know that, Gaz.”
“Good.” He pulled you into his chest without asking, all his anger from earlier transforming into gentleness. “You can tell me when you’re ready,” he said into your hair. 
You nodded. “Thank you.” He held you a bit tighter and you closed your eyes in peace. You never wanted him to let go. 
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König
He was frustrated with the way you were angry at him for insisting he do this mission alone. “You’re gonna get yourself killed!” You argued.
He had enough. He didn’t lose his temper often, but there was no way Konig was allowing you to come on a mission quite this dangerous. He pushed up from his chair, the table in front of him shaking as he did. 
He was a big guy, and you knew that, but the way he quickly took up the space of the room amazed you. “Verfickte Hurerei!” Fucking hell! he shouted. “Why are you pressing this so hard?!” He gestured towards you, his fists clenched and you winced. You cowered away, surprising even yourself with your actions. 
Konig watched you through his rapid blinking, dumbfounded by what just happened. It took him a second to process.
“Liebling?” He asked his voice back to its usual tone. “I wasn’t going to— fuck . I’m sorry.” A pang of guilt coursed through him. You thought he was going to hit you? Jesus Christ. He wanted to reach out to you but he refrained, knowing that might make things worse. 
“Konig,” you whispered and his eyes snapped to yours. He tilted his head, studying you as you regained your composure. “S’not you.” Your words were so faint it hurt his heart a little. 
He watched as you wiped away a stray tear. Your body had shifted back to how things used to be. Before Konig. 
Your lip quivered and you felt so small and embarrassed. Konig mouthed your name breathlessly and you blinked away tears before closing the distance between the two of you. You practically fell into his arms and he tightened them on you instinctively. 
“You okay, liebling?” He cooed, his hand stroking your hair. 
You nodded. “M’sorry.”
He pulled back so you had to tilt your chin and look up at him. “Don’t apologize.” His hand came up and stroked your cheek. 
“It’s not you,” you tried to reassure again, worried Konig was going to eat himself alive thinking you were afraid of him. 
“I know.” Your lips pinched together and Konig pulled you back into him. “You’re safe. You’ll always be safe with me.”
You felt tears fall; not out of terrible memories, but out of the love you felt radiating off of Konig. 
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Alejandro
“Jesus, would you just listen to me?” You shouted. 
“Listen to you?! You haven’t heard a fucking thing I’ve been saying!” He yelled back. His accent was always heavier on his words when he was mad. 
He took a big step towards you, his knife still in his hand, covered in blood. You flinched when he approached so suddenly. His dark words and his fast movements made you duck in fear. 
Alejandro paused all his movements, startled by your reaction. “Jesus,” he mumbled, sheathing his knife and holding his hands up. “I wouldn’t hurt you, mi amor.” He shook his head in frustration with himself. His jaw clenched as he watched you look back up at him. How awful he felt seeing your beautiful features shrouded in fear. 
“I…” you swallowed hard. “I’m sorry. The yelling… I don’t know. It just made me think back to…”
Something inside Alejandro shifted at your faint words. “Mataré a ese bastardo,” I’ll kill that bastard , he growled. “Who was it? Who fuckin’ touched you?” 
You shook your head. “Alejandro, please. It was so long ago.”
He clenched his fist, his other hand coming up to the scruff on his jaw. He closed his eyes to try and contain himself. When he opened them, you could still see the darkness lingering behind them. “I don’t care how long ago it was, mi amor. I need you to tell me who it was.”
You frowned and he closed his eyes again before walking up to you and pulling you into his arms. “God. I swear I’ll fuckin’ kill him.”
You let out the softest of giggles at how dramatic he could be. But still, you felt so safe knowing he would go to the ends of the world to protect you. You felt him kiss the top of your head, mumbling something about being sorry for yelling. 
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kirkwallsquad · 6 months ago
Text
favorite da2 battle lines in no particular order
i'm listening to a compilation by danaduchy on youtube rn so
literally every fenris line bcs everyone else is YELLING and he's just speaking in his regular quiet-ish voice. king what are you saying i can't HEAR YOU
except for when hawke goes down. THEN he's loudly upset.
"hawke's down! time to panic!" (isabela)
"the tame elf is down" (varric - what the fuck omg don't call fenris that)
"your pet elf has fallen" (carver - WHAT THE FUCK OMG DON'T CALL FENRIS THAT)
"that moody mage is down" (aveline)
"ugh, can someone pick up fenris please?" (merrill)
"isabela's on the ground... appropriately" (aveline - HELLO?!?!?!?)
"merrill! oh, blood mages are so dramatic" (isabela)
"aveline has fallen?" (fenris - why is this a question babe)
"they got whatshisname, the mage" (varric - i continue to believe he doesn't know anders' name until act 3)
"the dwarf has dropped a few more feet" (sebastian)
"dear varric, please learn to parry. love, your innards" (varric)
"do you have something for this, because it hurts" (carver)
"even my teeth hurt" (anders)
"i've got so many bruises now they've got names and families" (merrill)
"ugh, i have dirt in my mouth" (sebastian)
"you're going to let me walk around injured?" (carver)
"being close to death is very bad for my morale" (isabela)
sebastian describes his wounds as "oozing" or "seeping" more than once
"i know dalish are meant to be close to the earth, but we don't mean literally" (merrill)
"i'm alright, who needs kidneys anyway" (isabela)
"hawke. varric. i think this is bad." (merrill)
"stop being you and fix me up" (carver - BABY. BABY BROTHER.)
"that really gets the blood flowing" but also "i will fight and pray for forgiveness later" but also "this is much more exciting than the chantry!" (sebastian - what is wrong with you <3)
"my face is not a shield!" (hawke)
"and they say drinking doesn't solve anything" (isabela)
"haawke i can't mooove" (sebastian)
"i'm too far away, what do you want me to do? shout at them?" (isabela)
"i'd have to fly to reach! of course, i've always wanted to learn to fly" (merrill - she's literally the funniest person ever)
"alas, no" (fenris)
"my faith is my armor! my cause is my shield!" (sebastian)
"if we kill them, we get their stuff!" (isabela)
"andraste's knees, it's like herding cats!" (isabela)
"AFRAID YET?!" (anders)
"RUN! WHILE YOU CAN!" (anders - he's so loud i love him)
"another one for me! how many have you gotten, hawke?" (varric)
"ah. a shame that you're going to die, no?" (fenris)
"you. me. and an audience. that's what this is all about!" (carver)
"may the creators have mercy on you! i certainly won't." (merrill)
"destructive forces of nature, coming up!" (anders)
"suck on a fireball!" (anders)
"NEVER TAUNT A MAGE!!!" (anders)
"a thrust, now a parry" (fenris)
"i'm gonna taunt you in elvish now! durgen'len! aravel! vallaslin!" (merrill)
"hello, i'm merrill, and i'll be your distraction." (merrill)
"I'LL SHOW YOU WHY MAGES ARE FEARED!!!" (anders)
"maker please forgive your children" followed immediately by "DID YOU SEE THAT SHOT" (sebastian)
"WANT TO SEE WHAT'S UNDER THESE ROBES?!?!?!" (anders)
"I'M RIGHT HERE! HIT ME!" (isabela)
"maker, the idiocy" (bethany)
"MAKER BLESS YOUR CHILDREN IN THEIR HOUR OF NEEEED" (sebastian)
"my weapon does nothing??" (fenris - he sounds so puzzled help)
"this is SO not working" (anders)
"if the pointy sticks don't work, try the other pointy sticks" (isabela)
"ah, dear. why doesn't anyone ever want to be nice to us?" (merrill)
"is there an end to the people who hate you?" (aveline)
"looks like we've got a few more puppies to kick" (isabela - HELLO?!?)
"take a step, kill, repeat repeat repeat" (carver)
"the hate you inspire is unfortunate" (fenris)
"another twenty steps, another batch of deaths" (anders)
"nobody seems to like you. do you get used to that?" (merrill - ouch. brutal hskfjhgksdjfhg)
"i can't take credit for all of this. hawke helped a little bit" (isabela)
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mcrdvcks · 10 days ago
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Could I request a one shot of Old Man Logan? Something with fluff and angst like a huge argument between him and his other half and Laura works to get them to make up after days of not talking
things i wish you said
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chapter summary: You and Logan get into a fight and Laura tries to get the two of you to see the errors in your ways.
word count: 2.8k+
pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader
notes: thank y'all for sending in requests! i've been working on the last chapter of i love you, in every time but i ran into a bit of writer's block so the requests really helped <3
anyways, i hope this was what you wanted anon!
warnings/tags: au of 'logan (2017)' aka logan doesn't die at the end, arguments, angst, laura being smarter than reader and logan, really this is just laura being a smartass, fluff
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"I can’t believe you!” You set the dish towel angrily down on the counter, glaring at Logan. “You are the most stubborn man I have ever met.”
Logan leaned back against the doorframe, arms crossed, his expression hard. “Yeah? Well, someone’s gotta be stubborn, considering you’re trying to fix a situation that ain’t broken.”
“It is broken, Logan!” you snapped, pointing a finger at him. “You just refuse to see it because that’s what you do! Shut everything out, pretend like nothing’s wrong until it all blows up in your face.”
His jaw clenched, and he shook his head. “What’s wrong is you makin’ a mountain out of a molehill. I said I’ll handle it.”
“You handling it usually means disappearing for a week and coming back bloodied and brooding!” You threw your hands up, exasperated. “God forbid you actually let someone help you for once.”
“I don’t need your help!” he barked, his voice rising. “I’ve been doin’ just fine on my own for years.”
“And look where that’s gotten you!” The words came out sharper than you intended, but the frustration boiling in your chest wouldn’t let you stop. “You’re not on your own anymore, Logan. When are you gonna get that through your thick skull?”
Logan’s eyes darkened, and for a moment, he said nothing. Then, his voice dropped to a dangerous low. “You don’t think I know that? I didn’t ask for any of this, but here we are. I’m doin’ the best I can, and it ain’t enough for you, is it?”
“That’s not what I said!” You took a step toward him, shaking your head in disbelief. “But you don’t even try to meet me halfway. You just... shut down and push me out the second it gets hard.”
“Maybe I’m tryin’ to protect you,” he shot back, his words laced with frustration.
“From what? From you?” Your voice cracked, the argument chipping away at the walls you’d built to keep your own emotions in check. “I’m not scared of you, Logan. What scares me is losing you because you’re too damn stubborn to let anyone in.”
Logan’s mouth opened as if to retort, but no words came. He stood there, breathing hard, the weight of your words hanging heavy between you. Without another word, he turned and stalked out of the room, the screen door slamming behind him.
You stood there, staring at the door, your heart pounding. Part of you wanted to go after him, to yell more, to make him understand. But another part of you was too tired—too hurt.
The house was quiet now, save for the faint creak of the floorboards as Laura walked in from the hallway. She didn’t say anything right away, just hovered in the doorway, her arms crossed in that way that made her look far older than her twelve years.
“You two are so loud,” she finally said, her tone flat but edged with something that sounded suspiciously like annoyance.
You groaned, dropping your hands and looking over at her. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. We didn’t mean to wake you.”
“I wasn’t asleep,” Laura replied, stepping further into the kitchen. She pulled out a chair and sat across from you, her sharp gaze studying your face. “You’re crying.”
You swiped at your cheek quickly, though you weren’t sure why. Laura didn’t miss much. “It’s nothing, kiddo.”
“It didn’t sound like nothing,” she said, her tone even. She leaned her elbows on the table, her small hands clasped together. “You and Logan fight all the time now.”
“That’s not true,” you replied automatically, though the words felt hollow as soon as you said them.
Laura just stared at you, unblinking. “It is.”
You sighed, leaning back in your chair. “Sometimes grown-ups argue. That’s just how it is.”
“Yeah, but you’re mad at him all the time. And he’s mad at himself. It’s annoying.” Her bluntness cut through you, and she tilted her head. “Are you going to leave?”
“What? No.” The question startled you, and you leaned forward. “No, Laura. I’m not going anywhere. I love Logan. I just... wish he’d stop shutting me out.”
Laura didn’t say anything for a while. She just stared at you, her gaze as sharp as ever, like she was picking apart everything you’d just said.
Finally, she shrugged. “Then tell him.”
You blinked. “I have told him.”
“No, you yelled at him.” Her voice was flat, matter-of-fact, and it made you feel about two inches tall. “That’s not the same.”
You sighed, running a hand over your face. “It’s complicated, kid.”
Laura tilted her head. “No, it’s not. You’re mad. He’s mad. You both stop talking. Then you stay mad.”
You stared at her, caught off guard by how simple she made it sound. “It’s not that easy.”
Laura didn’t respond to that, just gave you a look—one of those looks that made you realize this twelve-year-old could probably win a staring contest with the Grim Reaper. She stood up without another word and walked back toward the hallway, leaving you sitting there with a mix of frustration, guilt, and... something else you couldn’t quite name.
---
The next few days were... quiet. Too quiet. Logan didn’t come around much, and when he did, it was brief—mostly to grab a beer or say a gruff goodnight. You didn’t push him, not yet, but the silence between you was its own kind of argument.
You also knew that he wasn’t sleeping in bed with you. You could tell because you’d wake up early for work, only to find Logan sprawled out on the couch, his legs dangling off the armrest. You would’ve woken him up—told him to go to bed while you left—but you stopped yourself every time. The anger hadn’t completely faded, but it had started to feel hollow, replaced by something heavier.
This morning was no different. You paused in the living room doorway, coffee in hand, watching him. He was fast asleep, one arm thrown over his face, the other hanging off the edge of the couch. You sighed quietly to yourself.
“Just go to bed, idiot,” you muttered under your breath, knowing he wouldn’t hear it.
---
Laura stood in the doorway of the garage, watching Logan fiddle with the same part of the truck he’d been pretending to fix for the past twenty minutes. She didn’t say anything at first—just stood there, arms crossed, her quiet presence heavy enough that Logan eventually sighed.
“You gonna say somethin’ or just stand there starin’?” he muttered without looking up, his voice rough.
Laura shrugged. “You’re not fixing anything.”
Logan’s hands paused for half a second before he went back to the wrench, a little harder this time. “Truck needs work.”
“It doesn’t,” Laura said bluntly. “You’re hiding.”
Logan froze again, jaw tightening. “Ain’t hidin’.”
“You are,” she insisted. Laura took a step closer, eyeing him like he was some kind of experiment she was studying. “You and Y/N are mad. It’s annoying.”
Logan finally looked up at her, scowling. “What’s annoying is you stickin’ your nose where it don’t belong.”
Laura didn’t flinch. She just stared at him, unfazed as ever. “If you don’t talk to her, she’s going to leave.”
Logan’s eyes narrowed, and his grip on the wrench tightened. “She’s not gonna leave.”
Laura raised an eyebrow. “You sure?”
Logan stared at her, expression unreadable, but he didn’t answer. He looked back at the truck instead, as if the bolts and metal could give him something to focus on. “You don’t know what you’re talkin’ about, kid.”
Laura stepped closer, crossing her arms tighter over her chest. “I know you. And I know her. She cries when you’re not looking.”
Logan stilled, his shoulders tensing, but he didn’t look at her. He didn’t want to hear it—didn’t want to think about it.
Laura didn’t stop. “You think shutting her out makes her safer, but it doesn’t. It just makes her sad.”
“Laura,” Logan said sharply, his voice low.
She ignored the warning in his tone. “You don’t want her to leave, but you’re acting like you do.”
That hit something, and Logan finally set the wrench down, exhaling harshly. “You don’t get it.”
“I do.” Laura’s voice was calm, but there was something pointed beneath it. “You’re scared. You don’t want to need her.”
Logan looked at her, his scowl deeper now, though it lacked its usual bite. “Yeah? Where’d you get all that from?”
Laura shrugged. “I watch you. I listen. You’re both loud.”
Logan shook his head and ran a hand over his face, grumbling under his breath. “You’re a real pain, you know that?”
She just tilted her head. “You’re worse.”
Logan let out a low, humorless chuckle. “Great. So now I’m gettin’ life advice from a twelve-year-old.”
Laura shrugged again and turned to leave. “If you don’t talk to her, I will.”
That got his attention. “Hey—”
But she was already walking out of the garage, not bothering to look back. “You’re welcome,” she called flatly.
Logan swore under his breath, watching her disappear. He sat there for a moment, hands resting on his knees, staring at the half-fixed truck. He hated that kid sometimes—hated how she could cut right through him like that.
And worse, she was right.
---
You came back from work late, opting to eat out instead of at home to avoid any awkward interactions. By the time you walked through the door, the house was dark except for the faint glow of the kitchen light. You set your bag down quietly, not wanting to risk waking anyone up.
But as you turned toward the living room, you noticed Logan sitting on the couch, a half-empty bottle of whiskey on the coffee table. He wasn’t looking at you—his gaze was fixed on the floor, his elbows on his knees, hands clasped loosely together.
You hesitated, debating whether to say anything or just go straight to bed. Before you could decide, his gravelly voice cut through the silence.
“You didn’t come home last night.”
You froze, then blinked. “What?”
He finally looked up at you, his expression unreadable. “Laura told me. Said she noticed. I didn’t.”
You frowned, your heart sinking a little. “Logan, I—”
“I should’ve noticed,” he interrupted, his voice low, almost too quiet. He leaned back, rubbing a hand over his face. “That’s on me.”
You crossed your arms, unsure what to say. “I didn’t stay out because of you.”
“Yeah, you did,” he replied bluntly, cutting you off again. “You’re avoiding me. I get it.”
The way he said it—so matter-of-fact, like he was resigned to it—made something twist in your chest. You sighed, running a hand through your hair. “I’m not avoiding you. I just needed... space.”
Logan scoffed, his lips curling into a humorless smirk. “Space. Right. Because I’m such a walk in the park to be around.”
“Logan—”
“I get it,” he repeated, louder this time, his frustration bubbling to the surface. “You don’t have to explain it. I know what I’m like. Hell, Laura reminds me every day.”
You shook your head, stepping closer. “This isn’t about Laura. It’s not even about you being... difficult. It’s about you not letting me in.”
He stiffened at that, his jaw clenching. “I’m tryin’.”
“Are you?” Your voice softened, but the hurt was still there. “Because from where I’m standing, it feels like you’re just waiting for me to give up.”
His eyes flicked to yours, and for a second, you thought he might argue. But then he sighed, slumping back against the couch. “I don’t know how to do this,” he admitted, his voice rough, almost bitter. “I don’t know how to let someone in without... screwin’ it all up.”
You stared at him, the anger you’d been holding onto slipping away, replaced by something softer. “You don’t have to have all the answers, Logan. I don’t expect you to be perfect. I just need you to try.”
“I am trying,” he muttered, his voice quieter now. “It just... doesn’t feel like it’s enough.”
“It is,” you said firmly, stepping closer until you were standing in front of him. “But you can’t keep shutting me out every time things get hard. That’s not how this works.”
He looked up at you, his expression guarded but vulnerable in a way you rarely saw. For a long moment, he didn’t say anything, just studied your face like he was trying to decide whether to believe you.
Finally, he let out a long breath and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees again. “I don’t want to lose you.”
“You won’t,” you said softly, your voice steady. “But you have to let me stay.”
Logan nodded slowly, like he was finally starting to understand. “Alright,” he said, his voice low but resolute. “I’ll... figure it out.”
“That’s all I’m asking,” you said, offering a small, tentative smile.
He didn’t smile back, but the tension in his shoulders eased slightly. He leaned back against the couch, his eyes meeting yours. “You eaten?”
You blinked at the sudden change in topic. “What?”
“You look tired,” he said gruffly. “Bet you skipped dinner.”
You huffed a quiet laugh, shaking your head. “I grabbed something on the way home.”
"Good," he muttered again, leaning back against the couch with a long exhale. His hand moved to the bottle of whiskey, but instead of picking it up, his fingers drummed against the glass absently.
You hesitated, then walked over to the couch, standing just in front of him. “Logan.”
He looked up at you, his brow furrowing slightly, waiting for you to say whatever was on your mind.
Instead, you sat down beside him, close enough that your knees touched. For a second, neither of you said anything. Then Logan let out another heavy sigh, reached over, and pulled you into his lap with a quiet grunt.
“Logan—”
“Just sit,” he said, his tone softer than usual, though still carrying that gruff edge. One of his hands rested lightly on your hip, the other settled on your thigh. His forehead dropped against your shoulder, and you could feel the tension in him start to ease as he let himself rest against you.
Your hands moved up instinctively, one settling on his arm, the other gently threading through his hair. He didn’t say anything at first, just breathed deeply, the weight of the past few days pressing down on both of you.
“You should come to bed tonight,” you murmured after a while, your voice quiet but steady.
Logan didn’t move, but you felt the way his body tensed under you. “I’m fine out here.”
“You’re not,” you said simply, your fingers brushing through his hair again. “You look miserable on this couch.”
He huffed a quiet laugh against your shoulder. “I’ll survive.”
“That’s not the point,” you pressed. “I want you in bed. With me. Where you belong.”
Logan lifted his head then, his eyes meeting yours. His expression was guarded, but there was something softer there too, like he was considering your words. “You sure you want me there?”
“Of course I’m sure,” you said, your hand moving to cup his jaw. “I always want you there, Logan. Even when I’m mad at you. Especially when I’m mad at you.”
That earned a faint smirk from him, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Didn’t think I was much for sharing a bed with someone.”
“Well, you’re not great at it,” you teased, trying to lighten the mood. “You steal the blankets, and you snore.”
“Don’t snore,” he muttered, his lips twitching slightly.
“You absolutely snore,” you shot back, smiling despite yourself. “But I don’t care. I just want you there.”
Logan studied you for a moment, his hand tightening slightly on your hip. Finally, he gave a small nod. “Alright.”
You smiled, leaning in to press a kiss to his temple. “Good.”
For a few minutes, you stayed like that, the silence between you no longer heavy but comfortable. Logan’s head rested against your chest, and you could feel the tension slowly draining out of him as your fingers moved lazily through his hair.
“Y’know,” he muttered after a while, his voice low, “Laura’s a pain in the ass sometimes.”
You chuckled softly. “She’s just looking out for you. For us.”
Logan grunted, his arm tightening around you slightly. “Kid’s too damn smart for her own good.”
“She gets that from you,” you said, smiling.
That earned another faint smirk, though he didn’t argue. Instead, he let out a quiet sigh, his eyes closing as he rested against you. “I’ll talk to her tomorrow.”
“Good,” you said softly, your hand continuing to stroke his hair.
For the first time in days, the tension between you felt like it was beginning to mend.
635 notes · View notes
koyagifs · 20 days ago
Text
𝓽𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽
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pairing: pirate!seonghwa x princess!reader au: pirate au genre: angst with happy ending word count: 9.3k synopsis: she refuses to be wed to someone she doesn't love. Her last resort? to run away with the pirate that stole her useless crown. warning(s): toxic family relationships, screaming match. cursing. please let me know if i miss anything else!!
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" don't go to far, please - the last thing i need is a headache from one of you," Hongjoong spoke, mainly looking at Wooyoung and Yuna who held a sheepish smile.
Hongjoong sighed as he crossed his arms, his gaze fixed on Wooyoung and Yuna. They both wore matching sheepish grins, looking like kids caught sneaking cookies before dinner.
"I'm serious," Hongjoong continued, his tone firm but tinged with a familiar exasperation. "Just stick to the group and don’t make me come looking for you. This isn’t the kind of place to mess around in."
Wooyoung, ever the troublemaker, raised his hands in mock surrender. "Relax, Captain. We’ll behave. Scouts’ honor."
Yuna nudged him playfully, suppressing a laugh. "You’ve never been a scout a day in your life."
"Details," Wooyoung quipped with a grin.
Hongjoong shook his head, muttering under his breath about regretting every decision that led to this moment. “I mean it, Wooyoung. No wandering off, no dumb dares, and definitely no—”
“Hongjoong, we got it!” Yuna cut in with a giggle, grabbing Wooyoung’s arm to pull him toward the others. “Come on, let’s not give him a real headache.”
As the pair walked off, Hongjoong pinched the bridge of his nose. Seonghwa chuckled as he walked up to his captain, " i'm sure they'll find trouble one way or another,"
Hongjoong let out a weary sigh, his shoulders sagging as he turned to face Seonghwa. "That’s exactly what I’m afraid of," he muttered, his tone a mix of frustration and resignation. Hongjoong shook his head as he walked back to the ship, mumbling under his breathe as Seonghwa laughed.
Yeosang and Luna came with a wide smile placed on their face, " we'll keep an eye on them. Shouldn't be to hard since cap just want's to rest up for a little."
Hongjoong glanced at Yeosang and Luna, his expression skeptical but hopeful. "You two?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "You’re volunteering to babysit them?"
Yeosang nodded, his ever-calm demeanor unshaken. "It’s better than letting them run loose. Besides," he added with a faint smirk, "how much trouble can they really get into in one evening?"
Luna grinned, hands on her hips. "Don’t answer that, Captain. We’ve got this. You go rest before you stress yourself into an early retirement."
Seonghwa chuckled, falling into step beside Hongjoong as they headed toward the ship. "See? Delegation. You’re learning."
Hongjoong rolled his eyes, though the hint of a smile crept onto his face. "Fine," he relented, pointing a finger at Yeosang and Luna. "But if I hear even one yell, crash, or scream, you’re both cleaning the whole deck tomorrow."
"Deal," Luna chirped, giving an exaggerated salute. "Come on, Yeosang. Let’s make sure the chaos twins don’t set anything on fire."
As they headed off in Wooyoung and Yuna’s direction, Hongjoong let out a long breath. "I’ll take what peace I can get," he muttered, heading for the ship’s cabin.
Seonghwa nudged him with a grin. "See? Maybe they’ll surprise you for once."
"Don’t jinx it," Hongjoong shot back, his tone dry but amused.
---
" yn, if you don't take your princess duty seriously you'll never find a husband!" your mother yelled, following behind you as you huffed in annoyance.
You stormed down the grand hallway, your footsteps echoing against the marble floor as your mother’s voice followed closely behind, sharp and insistent.
"Yn! Are you even listening to me?" she snapped, her tone climbing in frustration. "You can't just waltz around avoiding your responsibilities. A proper princess is dignified, poised, and knows her role!"
Turning on your heel, you faced her with an exasperated glare. "Mother, I don’t want to find a husband just because it’s expected of me," you shot back. "I have more important things to focus on than playing the perfect doll in some fairytale."
Her expression hardened, her lips pressing into a thin line. "You think this is just about you? This is about the kingdom—about your duty!"
You crossed your arms, refusing to back down. "And what about what I want? Have you ever considered that?"
She stepped closer, lowering her voice but losing none of its intensity. "What I’ve considered is the weight of this crown and the legacy you’ll inherit. Like it or not, you don’t have the luxury of selfishness, Yn."
She let out a long sigh as she walked up to you, her heels clicking as you turn away from her.
" yn, you and i both know that since we're born as women, we're nothing but breeding mares for this kingdom,"
Her words struck a nerve, freezing you in place. You didn’t turn back to face her, your hands trembling slightly at your sides. The weight of her statement settled over you like a heavy shroud, suffocating and inescapable.
"That’s not fair," you whispered, your voice low but laced with defiance.
"Life isn’t fair," she replied, her tone softer now but no less resolute. Her heels clicked against the floor again as she approached, the sound a steady rhythm that seemed to echo the inevitability of her words. "Do you think I wanted this life? To be defined by my duty, my marriage, my children?"
You turned to her then, your eyes blazing with frustration and pain. "Then why force it on me? If you hated it so much, why make me follow the same path?"
She paused, the lines of her face softening as her gaze met yours. For a moment, she looked less like the stern queen and more like a tired woman who had carried too much for too long. " my love, your father would have both our heads if we dared."
Your mother placed a hand on your shoulder, turning you to face her. Her touch was gentle, but her words carried a weight that made your chest tighten. You met her gaze, and for a moment, the mask of the ever-dutiful queen cracked, revealing the vulnerable woman underneath.
"Yn," she began softly, her voice trembling just enough for you to notice, "I understand more than you think. There was a time when I dreamed of more, too. But your father—" She paused, glancing away as if the mere mention of him cast a shadow over the room. "He is not a man who tolerates defiance."
You swallowed hard, the mention of your father sending a chill through you. "That doesn’t mean we have to live in fear of him forever," you said, your voice steady despite the lump in your throat.
Her hand tightened slightly on your shoulder, her eyes searching yours. "It’s not just fear, my love. It’s survival. Every choice I’ve made has been to protect you—to protect us."
"Protect me from what?" you challenged, your frustration bubbling to the surface. "From living? From being more than what he expects of us?"
Her lips pressed into a thin line, but her eyes softened with a sorrow that seemed to stretch back through years of quiet sacrifices. "From his wrath," she whispered. "From a world that will not forgive us for stepping out of line."
You shook your head, your heart aching with a mix of anger and compassion. "I don’t want to live like this, Mother. I can’t. I’ll find a way to be free, even if it means facing his wrath."
Her eyes glistened, and for a brief moment, you thought she might cry, but she held herself together. "You’re braver than I ever was," she said quietly. "But bravery can be a double-edged sword. Promise me you’ll be careful, Yn. Please."
"I promise," you replied, though you weren’t sure if it was a lie or not.
She gave you a faint, bittersweet smile, her hand lingering on your shoulder a moment longer before she let go. "Then may the gods watch over you," she said, turning to leave, her regal composure returning with every step.
---
Seonghwa weaved through the bustling market stalls, his sharp eyes scanning the vibrant scene around him. The air was thick with the mingling scents of spices, fresh bread, and roasting meats, while the hum of chatter and the occasional bark of a merchant echoed through the narrow streets. Yunho kept pace beside him, his easy smile drawing glances from passersby.
Behind them, Jongho walked with a steady stride, his expression calm but alert, his arms crossed as he kept a watchful eye on the group. Mingi, on the other hand, couldn’t help but drift from stall to stall, his curiosity pulling him toward anything that glittered or smelled enticing.
"Keep an eye on Mingi before he buys half the market," Seonghwa murmured to Yunho, a hint of amusement tugging at his lips.
Yunho chuckled, glancing back to see Mingi enthusiastically inspecting a tray of sparkling trinkets. "I’ll rein him in if he starts haggling. You know how he gets."
San trailed just behind Mingi, clearly enjoying the lively atmosphere. He paused to admire a display of ornate daggers, his fingers brushing the intricate carvings on the hilts. "These are nice," he said, glancing over his shoulder at Jongho. "Bet you’d like one of these."
Jongho raised an eyebrow but didn’t break stride. "I’d rather not have to use one, but thanks."
Seonghwa slowed his pace, letting the group catch up as they reached the heart of the market, a wide square where performers entertained small crowds and merchants hawked their finest wares. "Stick together," he said, his tone firm but not unkind. "We don’t want to draw unnecessary attention."
"Too late for that," Yunho teased, gesturing subtly to a group of onlookers whose curiosity was clearly piqued by their presence.
Seonghwa sighed, adjusting his cloak to obscure the insignia on his chest. "Just stay sharp. We’re here for supplies, not trouble."
"Trouble always seems to find us anyway," Mingi said with a grin, finally stepping away from the jewelry stall to join the group.
"Let’s hope it takes its time today," Seonghwa replied, his eyes sweeping the square once more before leading them toward the next row of stalls.
The sudden yells from guards caught their attention as they see wooyoung, yuna, luna and yeosang running pass them. Wooyoung halting as he held a grin on his face.
" hyung, hold this for me yeah?"
Seonghwa barely had time to register what was happening before Wooyoung shoved a small, wrapped bundle into his hands, the grin on his face both mischievous and unapologetic.
“Wooyoung—what did you do?” Seonghwa asked, his tone sharp as his eyes darted to the approaching guards, their shouts growing louder.
“Nothing you need to worry about, hyung!” Wooyoung called back as he started running again, laughing as Yuna tugged at his sleeve to keep him moving. Luna and Yeosang were right behind, both looking equal parts amused and panicked.
Mingi blinked, staring at the fleeing group before glancing at the bundle in Seonghwa’s hands. “Uh…should we be concerned about whatever that is?”
San smirked, crossing his arms. “Knowing Wooyoung? Absolutely.”
Seonghwa let out a frustrated sigh, quickly unwrapping the bundle just enough to peek inside. His eyes widened slightly as he caught sight of crown.
“Are you kidding me?” he hissed, his gaze snapping back to the fleeing figures.
Yunho chuckled nervously, scratching the back of his neck. “Well, it’s Wooyoung. Are you really surprised?”
“Not the point,” Seonghwa snapped, shoving the bundle under his cloak as the guards approached, their faces flushed with anger.
“You there!” one of the guards barked, pointing at Seonghwa and his group. “Did you see four troublemakers run through here?”
Seonghwa straightened, his expression calm and unreadable. “Troublemakers? No, but the market’s busy today. They could’ve gone anywhere.”
The guard narrowed his eyes, clearly not convinced, but another called out, “They went that way!” pointing in the opposite direction.
As the guards ran off, Seonghwa exhaled slowly, his grip tightening on the bundle. “We’re going to kill him.”
" not before captain does, so should we bother saving them?" Jongho asked, amused.
Seonghwa paused mid-step, glancing at Jongho with a raised brow. “Captain’s wrath is inevitable,” he admitted, tucking the bundle deeper into his cloak. “But if we don’t step in, they’ll probably end up in the dungeon—or worse. And you know who will have to smooth things over then.”
Yunho chuckled, hands resting on his hips. “That’s true. I’d rather deal with Captain’s yelling than a week of palace politics.”
Mingi nodded enthusiastically. “Same. Last time Wooyoung got caught, I spent three days explaining to the magistrate why we weren’t a band of criminals.”
San smirked, leaning slightly against a nearby stall. “Let them sweat it out for a bit. Maybe they’ll learn something.”
Jongho tilted his head, his expression unreadable save for the glimmer of amusement in his eyes. “Unlikely, but it’s a nice thought.”
Seonghwa sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “If we leave them, Captain will hold us accountable for not intervening sooner. So yes, we’re saving them.”
“Fine,” San said with a mock sigh, pushing off the stall. “But only because I don’t feel like listening to Captain’s lecture either.”
“Agreed,” Jongho said with a small smile, already falling in step with the group. “Though I still think it’s entertaining to watch them dig their own graves.”
Yunho clapped a hand on Seonghwa’s shoulder as they started moving again. “You’ve got to admit, though, they make life interesting.”
Seonghwa rolled his eyes, though a faint smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “Too interesting,” he muttered, picking up the pace. “Let’s make sure they don’t burn the entire market down before we get to them.”
--- Seonghwa crouched low, his dark cloak blending seamlessly with the shadows as he approached the massive palace doors. The weight of the task ahead pressed heavily on his chest, but he refused to let it show. His eyes, sharp and calculating, flicked over the guards stationed at their posts—he could slip past them, he knew it. He was the Seonghwa, Hongjoong's first mate, after all. He’d navigated worse situations before; this was nothing compared to the battles and escapes he had mastered in the past.
Still, the closer he got to the door, the more the dread settled in his gut. There was something about tonight—about this mission—that felt different. The palace held too many secrets, too many eyes watching. Every step felt like it could be his last if even the slightest mistake was made.
Seonghwa took a deep breath, forcing the tension out of his body, and reminded himself of the importance of the mission. He wasn’t here to be caught. He just needed to place the crown back before the realized it was stolen.
He glanced back at the shadows where Mingi and Yunho were waiting, their eyes flashing with silent determination. The rest of the crew would stay on standby, ready to move if needed. But Seonghwa didn’t want it to come to that.
He focused on the door again, studying the guards’ movements. Timing was everything, and he knew the exact second to make his move. A guard yawned, shifting his position just enough to allow Seonghwa the window he needed.
With a practiced grace, he moved, slipping into the palace hall with barely a sound, his heart beating only slightly faster than usual. The grand hall was quiet, the only noise the distant echoes of the palace's humming life. He didn’t have much time before someone would notice he had entered.
He moved swiftly through the corridors, his boots soft on the marble floors, but his mind was alert. There were more guards inside than he’d anticipated, and the risk of discovery increased with each step. But Seonghwa trusted in his skill, in his ability to navigate even the most heavily guarded places.
"Focus," he whispered to himself, mentally shaking off the unease that tried to take root. This was just another challenge, another step in the game. He had overcome far worse than this.
And he would get out. He would finish this.
Finally, he reached the familiar doors—the ones that led to the chambers where you were likely being kept. His heart pounded now, but it wasn’t fear; it was the sharp anticipation of success. He reached for the hidden key he'd stolen earlier from one of the servants, his fingers trembling just slightly as he slid it into the lock.
With a soft click, the door creaked open. Seonghwa slipped inside.
Seonghwa moved swiftly, his cloak swishing behind him as he placed the crown back into its original position on the velvet pillow. His breath slowed, and for a moment, it felt like everything had fallen into place. He had done it. The crown was back in its place, and the plan could continue without any major repercussions.
But as he turned to leave, his heart skipped a beat. The faint sound of footsteps echoed down the hallway just outside the chamber door. The guards were coming. They had to be.
Seonghwa’s eyes darted around the room, looking for a place to hide, but there was nowhere near enough time. His pulse quickened as the door handle began to turn. He had to make a decision, and quickly.
With a final glance at the crown—now safely restored—he slipped into the shadows, holding his breath as the door creaked open, praying that the guards wouldn’t notice the subtle shift in the room. The smallest movement could betray him. The smallest hesitation could ruin everything.
He remained still, blending into the darkness as the guards entered, their voices low, but their presence filling the space. The tension was unbearable, each second stretching on forever as Seonghwa prayed they wouldn’t see him, wouldn’t find him hiding in plain sight.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the guards turned and left, oblivious to the fact that someone had been there, so close to the crown they had sworn to protect.
Seonghwa let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding. He moved quietly toward the door, already planning his next steps. The crown was back. Now, he just needed to get out of the palace undetected and reunite with the others before it was too late.
" ahem,"
Seonghwa’s breath caught in his throat as the voice pierced through the stillness of the room, his body going rigid with shock. He had been so close to escaping undetected, but now... now he was caught. His hand instinctively went to the hilt of his blade, but he stopped himself just as quickly. There was no immediate threat here, no alarm ringing out, but the feeling of being exposed was enough to make his heart race.
You stood there, a smirk playing at the corner of your lips, watching him closely. The flicker of moonlight from the nearby window caught in your eyes, making them gleam with mischief and a hint of something else—something that Seonghwa couldn’t quite place. He felt his muscles tense as he quickly scanned the room, but there was no way out now. You had him cornered.
"Well, well," you said with a teasing edge to your voice, taking a few more steps toward him. "I must say, I’m surprised to see you here. The Park Seonghwa, first mate of captain hongjoong."
" get on with it," Seonghwa hissed
You paused, your smirk widening as you noticed the flicker of impatience in Seonghwa's eyes. His posture had shifted slightly, the sharp tension in his body betraying just how on edge he was. But you weren't about to make it easy for him.
"You really thought you'd sneak in here unnoticed, huh?" you teased, taking another step closer, your eyes never leaving his. "I mean, first mate of Captain Hongjoong—quite the title, don’t you think? Surely, you’re used to getting away with anything."
Seonghwa’s patience was wearing thin, but he forced himself to stay composed, his voice low and controlled. "Get on with it," he repeated, the command sharp, but his gaze still wary, measuring you.
You didn’t flinch at his harsh tone, your gaze unwavering. "Alright, alright," you said, drawing the words out slowly, savoring the moment. "I’m not here to ruin your little heist. If that's what you’re worried about."
Seonghwa’s eyes flickered to the crown for a split second before returning to you, suspicion rising. "Then what do you want?"
" freedom,"
Seonghwa looked at you confused, " freedom? you're the fucking princess and you're asking a pirate for freedom?"
You chuckled softly at Seonghwa's reaction, the confusion in his eyes only making your smirk widen. The idea of freedom, of escape, was something you knew all too well. You took a deliberate step forward, close enough now that you could almost feel the tension crackling between you.
"Yes, freedom," you repeated, your voice steady despite the fire in his gaze. "The kind of freedom you can’t buy or steal. The kind of freedom that means being in control of your own life for once. That’s what I’m after."
Seonghwa's eyebrows furrowed deeper, disbelief written across his face. "You want freedom?" He scoffed, taking a half-step back, disbelief and annoyance mixing in his expression. "You're the princess. You’ve got everything handed to you. Power, wealth, luxury. What the hell do you need freedom for?"
You held his gaze, unflinching, your voice lower now, almost a whisper. "You think I don’t know what people like you think of people like me?" There was a cold edge in your words, one that matched the resolve in your eyes. "You think I’ve spent my entire life locked away in some gilded cage, waiting for someone to save me. But that’s not the kind of freedom I want."
Seonghwa was silent for a moment, his confusion giving way to a flicker of realization. "So what do you want from me?" he asked, voice quieter now, as if the game had shifted.
You tilted your head slightly, the smirk still playing on your lips, though it was tempered by something more dangerous now. "You’re a pirate, right? You live by your own rules. You fight for your own freedom every damn day. I need someone like you to help me escape this place. And I’m offering you a deal in return."
Seonghwa’s gaze narrowed, and for a brief moment, his mind seemed to be working through all the angles. You were the princess, but there was something in your demeanor—something in the way you spoke—that made him wonder if you were telling the truth. You weren't the helpless, sheltered royal he had expected. You were calculating, strategic. And maybe, just maybe, you were a risk worth taking.
"You want me to help you escape," he said slowly, still processing the idea.
you nodded, a sigh escaping Seonghwa as he held his hand out. Your heart practically leaped out your chest as you grabbed it. This was it, you're finally leaving.
---
Seonghwa stood tall, his back straight, even as Hongjoong's frustration seemed to fill the entire room, thick and suffocating. Wooyoung, Yuna, Yeosang, and Luna remained quiet, the weight of the moment pressing down on all of them. They knew stealing the crown would bring punishment, but to have Hongjoong this furious was not on their agenda.
Hongjoong’s pacing grew more erratic, the sound of his boots on the floor sharp, each step echoing in the cabin. His gaze snapped to Seonghwa, his voice sharp as a whip. "This was not the fucking plan, Seonghwa!" Hongjoong spat, his eyes burning with anger. "You were supposed to bring the crown back, not bring back a fucking princess. The princess at that!"
Seonghwa’s jaw tightened, but he refused to let his gaze falter. He could feel the tension in the room, could practically hear the others holding their breath, waiting for the confrontation to unfold.
"You don’t understand," Seonghwa finally said, his voice unwavering, though there was a hard edge to it now.
Hongjoong scoffed, looking at the four, " the four of you out. now"
The command was sharp, and the weight of it hit the room like a slap. Hongjoong’s gaze swept across the four of them—Wooyoung, Yuna, Yeosang, and Luna—each of them tense under his gaze. None of them moved immediately, all of them holding their breath, unsure if they were meant to stay or if their captain's words were final.
Yuna was the first to step back, her face set with a mixture of uncertainty and resignation. Yeosang followed suit, his eyes flicking between Seonghwa and Hongjoong before silently turning to leave. Luna hesitated only for a moment, then moved with quick, quiet steps toward the door, her head lowered.
Wooyoung, however, stayed rooted in place, his usual mischievous grin nowhere to be found. He exchanged a glance with Seonghwa, an unspoken question in his eyes. But even he knew when to back down—at least for now.
"Come on, Wooyoung," Yuna called softly from the doorway, her voice breaking the tense silence. "Let’s go."
With a reluctant sigh, Wooyoung turned toward the door, the weight of the situation settling heavily on his shoulders. He gave Seonghwa a last look, his expression unreadable, before following the others out of the cabin.
The door closed softly behind them, leaving Hongjoong and Seonghwa alone. The air in the room felt thick, like the calm before a storm. Hongjoong stood there for a long moment, his anger still simmering just beneath the surface.
"You’ve lost your fucking mind," Hongjoong muttered , his voice lower now, quieter, the anger still simmering beneath his words.
Seonghwa wanted to roll his eyes, but he knew better.
" you're my first mate for a reason Seonghwa. What made you think it would be a great fucking idea to bring a princess on board?"
Seonghwa bit back the urge to roll his eyes, knowing that Hongjoong was far too sharp to miss any sign of defiance. He stood straighter, forcing himself to remain composed, even though the question felt like an obvious one to him.
" she wants freedom like we do captain. Isn't that why you made this crew? for us to have freedom that we couldn't have?"
Seonghwa's words hung in the air, and for a moment, Hongjoong paused, his back still turned to Seonghwa. The question had landed squarely in the captain's mind, and for the first time in a while, doubt crept in.
Hongjoong’s hands clenched into fists at his sides, his voice low but tinged with the weight of his past decisions. "I didn’t form this crew just for freedom, Seonghwa," he muttered, his eyes staring out at the endless ocean, as though seeking answers from it. "I formed it to survive. To fight back against the system that kept us shackled. But freedom—true freedom—it’s a luxury. And it doesn’t come easily. You’re talking about taking a princess on board as if she’s just another crew member, but she’s not. She’s royalty. She’s got her own ties, her own rules, and all of those ties will pull her in directions we can’t control."
Seonghwa's scoff echoed in the tense silence, and the moment it left his lips, even he felt the sharpness of his words. He hadn’t meant for his frustration to slip through so visibly, but it was too late to take it back. Hongjoong turned his head quickly, his sharp eyes narrowing on him as if searching for any sign of weakness.
"I’m not some fucking foster home to keep bringing in strays, Park Seonghwa. First Luna, now Yuna, now you’re bringing me a god damn princess."
Seonghwa’s gaze hardened, but he refused to let Hongjoong's words throw him off course. "You want to talk about strays, Captain?" His voice was low, but the underlying edge made it clear he wasn’t backing down. "What about us? What about you? We’re all strays. Pirates, outcasts, cast aside by the world we were born into. None of us fit in anywhere. We made this ship our home, and we fight for the freedom we never got. And you want to call her a stray?"
Hongjoong’s fist slammed onto the desk with a loud crack, the force of it making the wood shake beneath the impact. The sudden motion made Seonghwa flinch, his body stiffening as the captain’s anger surged in the room like a storm.
"She is a princess, Seonghwa," Hongjoong snarled, his voice seething with frustration.
"Oh, but it was fine when Mina joined, huh?" Seonghwa’s voice was laced with frustration, but there was an edge to it that Hongjoong hadn’t expected. "It’s not my fault she left you!"
Seonghwa's words hit the air like a slap, sharp and cutting. Hongjoong froze, his face hardening at the mention of Mina. The room seemed to freeze for a moment, tension crackling between them like a storm about to break. The mention of Mina, a name that had always carried so much weight in Hongjoong’s life, caused a flicker of pain in his chest. His fists clenched at his sides, the words stinging more than he wanted to admit.
"Get out," Hongjoong snarled, his voice cutting through the tension in the room like a blade.
Seonghwa’s throat tightened, the weight of his words crashing down on him. He had never seen Hongjoong this angry, this raw with emotion. He opened his mouth to speak, to apologize, but the words caught in his throat. He wasn’t sure what to say anymore.
"Now."
Seonghwa hesitated, regret gnawing at him as he looked at Hongjoong, but he knew better than to push further. The captain was done, and Seonghwa had overstepped. With a final glance, Seonghwa nodded, a knot of guilt forming in his stomach.
" captain -"
" OUT SEONGHWA!"
Seonghwa hesitated for a split second longer, wanting to explain, to make things right, but the door to reconciliation had already been slammed shut. Without another word, he turned away from Hongjoong and walked toward the door.
----
Yn watched from her position by the railing, her gaze tracking Seonghwa’s retreating figure. She could see the tight set of his shoulders, the way his footsteps lacked the usual confidence, and she knew something had happened. She could feel the tension in the air, thick enough to taste. It wasn't hard to guess that the argument between him and Hongjoong hadn't gone well.
Seonghwa’s eyes didn’t meet hers as he passed, his expression a mix of frustration and regret, but he didn’t slow down. His focus was entirely on the quarter deck, where his duties awaited. Yn felt a tug in her chest, unsure whether she should approach or give him space. But the coldness in his demeanor made her hesitate.
Yn turned at the sound of Yunho and San’s voices, both of them standing a few steps behind her with understanding smiles. It was clear they had noticed the same tension in the air, but unlike her, they seemed unfazed by it.
"Don’t worry about him," Yunho said gently, his tone reassuring. "They both just need to cool off."
San chuckled softly, his eyes glinting with amusement. "It’s always like this with them. They’re both stubborn as hell. They’ll figure it out."
Yn gave them a small smile, though her mind was still caught up in the events of the day. She knew they were right—Seonghwa and Hongjoong both had strong personalities, and clashes were inevitable. But the way Seonghwa had walked away, his usual confidence gone, made her wonder how deep the rift had really gone.
Yn turned at the sound of Mingi's voice, his playful grin immediately catching her attention. He leaned casually against the railing, arms crossed, a mischievous glint in his eyes. Behind him, Yeosang, who had been quietly observing, gave her a soft, knowing smile.
Mingi raised an eyebrow, his gaze filled with curiosity. "So, a princess, huh? What made you want to run away?" His tone was light, teasing, but there was a genuine interest there too. It was clear he was intrigued by her decision, and despite his usual easy-going demeanor, he wasn’t afraid to ask the tough questions.
" you try marrying a person you don't love" You said, sticking your tongue out.
Mingi chuckled at your response, shaking his head as he reached out and lightly ruffled your hair. "Fair point," he said, his tone filled with amusement.
" but i can assure you, you're not our first princess, princess" Yunho said, chuckling.
You raised an eyebrow at Yunho's words, the teasing tone in his voice sparking your curiosity. You turned to face him, a smirk playing on your lips. "Oh?" you asked, genuinely intrigued. "And who might the other princesses be?"
" me"
You looked at a girl - who was clinging onto wooyoung who held a friendly smile. You smiled at her, jumping up and clung to her arm.
" you're going to be my new best friend"
----
It had been a week since Seonghwa had brought Yn aboard the ship, and the tension between him and Hongjoong was still thick in the air. The crew had begun to adjust to the presence of the princess among them, though things still felt unsettled. The laughter and lighthearted moments that had once filled the ship’s decks now seemed tempered by the silent rift between the captain and his first mate.
Yn, for her part, had tried to adapt to life on board, finding comfort in the camaraderie of the crew. She had formed a bond with Mingi and Yunho, and even the quieter members like Yeosang had made her feel welcome. Despite everything, the sea felt like the freedom she had been seeking, even if she knew things were far from perfect. But she couldn't ignore the unease whenever she passed Hongjoong or Seonghwa.
Hongjoong hadn’t spoken much to Seonghwa after their heated argument. The captain had kept his distance, his cold stares and sharp words hanging over their interactions like a storm cloud. It wasn’t just the crew who felt the divide; it was the air around the ship itself—heavy, charged, like a brewing storm just waiting to break.
Seonghwa had done his best to keep a low profile, sticking to his duties, but there was an underlying tension in his every movement. He tried to interact with the crew as normal, though it was clear that his thoughts were elsewhere, constantly shifting between guilt and frustration. His attempt to bring Yn into the fold had backfired in a way he hadn’t anticipated, and the guilt of betraying Hongjoong’s trust weighed on him more than he cared to admit.
For now, everything seemed to be in a holding pattern. The crew was going about their work, the usual banter and laughter returning in fits and starts, but there was still a heavy silence whenever Seonghwa or Hongjoong were around. It was clear that something needed to give, but no one could say when or how.
" hwa.."
Seonghwa looked at the princess, his chest tighten as he went back to peeling his orange. you huffed in annoyance, sitting beside him.
"im sorry for having hongjoong yell at you..."
Seonghwa's hand paused mid-peel, the orange's skin half-removed as his gaze softened. He had been avoiding this conversation, but the sincerity in your voice made it impossible to ignore. He let out a slow breath, his fingers carefully continuing their task as he glanced at you, a faint smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
"Yn..." he began, his voice quiet but steady, "It's not your fault. Hongjoong has his reasons, even if they don’t always make sense to the rest of us."
You watched him for a moment, sensing the weight in his words. The crew might have laughed and joked, but you could see how much this whole situation was taking a toll on him. You reached out and placed a hand gently on his arm, your voice low but determined.
"I don’t want to be the reason for any more tension between you two," you said softly.
Seonghwa shook his head, " it was my decision princess, don't worry about it." You frowned, watching Seonghwa as he meticulously separated a segment of the orange and popped it into his mouth, clearly trying to end the conversation. But you couldn’t just let it go. His nonchalance only made the guilt in your chest heavier.
"But you’re paying for that decision," you said, your voice tinged with frustration. "Hongjoong hasn’t spoken to you in a week, Seonghwa. That’s not fair."
Seonghwa sighed, placing the rest of the orange down on the railing beside him. He turned to you, his dark eyes softening slightly. "Life isn’t fair, Princess. Especially not out here. I knew what I was doing when I brought you on board. I’d make the same choice again, even knowing the consequences."
Your heart clenched at his words, the conviction behind them making it hard to argue. Still, the guilt gnawed at you. "I just... I don’t want to be the cause of a rift in your crew. You’re all like a family. I’ve seen how much this ship and these people mean to you."
Seonghwa gave a small, bittersweet smile, brushing his hands off on his pants. "We are a family, but even families fight. Hongjoong will come around—he always does. He’s stubborn, but he’s not unreasonable. He’ll see why I made the choice I did, even if it takes time."
You stared at him for a moment, taking in the calm assurance in his voice. Even in the middle of this storm, Seonghwa seemed so composed, so unwavering.
"And if he doesn’t?" you asked quietly.
Seonghwa tilted his head, the faintest smirk tugging at his lips. "Then I’ll just have to live with it. My loyalty to this crew isn’t in question, Princess. I brought you here because I believe you deserve a chance at freedom, just like the rest of us. If Hongjoong can’t accept that... well, I’ll deal with that when it comes."
Your chest tightened at his words, a mix of admiration and worry filling you. "You shouldn’t have to sacrifice so much for me," you said softly.
Seonghwa chuckled lightly, shaking his head. "You’ll find, Princess, that sacrifices are part of life. Especially out here. You just have to make sure what you’re sacrificing for is worth it."
He reached out and gently tapped the back of your hand, his touch reassuring. "And you are. Don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise."
months later ~
Hongjoong’s gaze was sharp as he leaned against the railing near Mingi, his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes were fixed on Yn, who was kneeling beside Yuna, both laughing as they worked on cleaning the fish they had just caught. Her movements were clumsy, a clear sign that she wasn’t used to such tasks, but her genuine effort seemed to amuse Yuna.
Mingi glanced at the captain, sensing the tension radiating from him. He shifted slightly, keeping one hand steady on the wheel while glancing between Hongjoong and the scene below.
“Still not warming up to her, huh?” Mingi asked, his tone light but careful.
Hongjoong’s lips twitched slightly, though he quickly masked it with a deep sigh. The sound of Yuna gagging in exaggerated disgust echoed across the deck as Yn doubled over in laughter, holding her sides.
“Oh, come on, Yuna, it’s just a little fish guts!” Yn teased, holding up her hands, which were covered in the slimy remains.
Yuna dramatically turned away, clutching her stomach. “Ugh, you’re worse than Wooyoung! I didn’t think that was even possible.”
“Hey!” Wooyoung called out from where he stood with Seonghwa, his mock-offended tone drawing more laughter from the crew.
Mingi grinned, glancing at Hongjoong out of the corner of his eye. “She’s fitting in, Captain. Whether you like it or not.”
Hongjoong didn’t respond, his gaze flicking back to Yn. She had taken a step closer to Yuna, holding out her hands playfully as if threatening to wipe the mess on her. Yuna shrieked and darted away, the two now engaged in a spirited chase across the deck.
Seonghwa hesitated for a moment as he approached you, his usual stoic demeanor faltering just slightly. Despite the fact that you were smeared with fish guts and laughing like a child, there was something about your smile that made his heart stumble in his chest.
“You’re making quite the impression, Princess,” he said, his voice laced with teasing as he crossed his arms over his chest.
You grinned up at him, wiping your hands on your already filthy cloak. “What can I say? I’m a fast learner. Yuna’s just being dramatic.”
From behind you, Yuna groaned loudly, still recovering from her exaggerated reaction. “Dramatic? You’re disgusting, Yn!”
Seonghwa chuckled, the sound soft but genuine. He reached into his pocket, pulling out a clean rag and offering it to you. “Here. Maybe clean up before someone mistakes you for part of the catch.”
You took the rag with a playful roll of your eyes, but your smile never wavered. As you wiped your hands, you looked up at him. “I don’t think I’ve seen you laugh this much since I got here, Seonghwa. Are you finally warming up to me?”
Seonghwa smirked, leaning slightly closer. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Princess. I’m just amused at how quickly you’ve adapted to life on the ship. Even if it’s... unconventional.”
You pretended to be offended, placing a hand over your heart. “Unconventional? I’ll have you know I’m blending in perfectly. Right, Yuna?”
Yuna, now leaning against the railing and catching her breath, shot Seonghwa a look. “She’s your problem now, Hwa. I’m done.”
Seonghwa shook his head, trying to suppress a laugh as you turned back to him with an innocent expression. “Looks like I’m stuck with you,” he said with mock resignation.
“Could be worse,” you replied, giving him a wink.
Seonghwa's smile faltered as his gaze shifted upward. Standing on the upper deck, Hongjoong’s figure loomed above, his expression unreadable. Their eyes locked for a brief moment, a silent exchange passing between them. Seonghwa’s chest tightened as he braced himself for whatever silent judgment his captain might be harboring.
Without a word, Hongjoong turned away and disappeared into the shadows of the helm, leaving Seonghwa standing there, the weight of that look settling heavily on his shoulders.
You followed Seonghwa’s gaze, frowning slightly. “He’s still upset, isn’t he?”
Seonghwa exhaled slowly, running a hand through his hair as he tore his eyes away from where Hongjoong had stood. “Hongjoong’s always thinking five steps ahead. He’s not upset—he’s calculating.��
“Calculating what?” you asked, your tone gentle but curious.
Seonghwa hesitated, his jaw tightening. “Whether I’ve made the biggest mistake of my life bringing you here, Princess.”
Your heart sank at his words, but before you could respond, Seonghwa turned back to you, his expression softening slightly. “Don’t take it personally. Hongjoong doesn’t trust easily—it’s not just you. He’s always been like this.”
You gave him a small smile, though it didn’t quite reach your eyes. “Still... I don’t want to be the reason things are strained between you two. I’ll prove I’m worth the risk.”
Seonghwa’s lips quirked upward in a faint smile. “You’ve got guts, Princess. I’ll give you that.”
As he spoke, the sound of Wooyoung’s laughter carried over from the other side of the deck, followed by Yuna’s mock protests. The ship seemed alive with energy, but the weight of Hongjoong’s lingering gaze hung in the back of Seonghwa’s mind.
“Come on,” Seonghwa said, nodding toward the rigging. “Let’s get you out of Yuna’s hair before she decides to throw you overboard.”
----
Seonghwa stood at the edge of the deck, his arms crossed as he watched you splash in the water with Yuna and Luna. The laughter that echoed across the ship was infectious, pulling a rare smile from his lips despite his usual stoic demeanor.
Yuna’s tail shimmered brightly under the sunlight, its scales catching the rays and casting iridescent patterns across the surface of the water. She flicked it playfully, sending a spray of water your way, making you squeal and shield your face. Luna’s laughter joined yours, her voice carrying easily over the gentle lapping of the waves.
"They’re like kids," Wooyoung muttered beside Seonghwa, leaning casually against the railing. His grin was wide, his eyes filled with amusement.
Seonghwa didn’t respond immediately, his gaze lingering on you as you tried to splash Yuna back, only to trip slightly in the shallow water and laugh at yourself. There was something so unguarded, so free, about the way you moved. It was a stark contrast to the formality you’d arrived with.
Seonghwa shook his head, a small smile tugging at his lips as he watched you. "She deserves it," he murmured, more to himself than to Wooyoung.
Wooyoung, leaning lazily against the railing, raised an eyebrow at Seonghwa’s uncharacteristically soft expression. "You’re really gone, huh?" he teased, his grin mischievous. "Who would’ve thought Park Seonghwa, the unshakable first mate, has a soft spot for a runaway princess?"
Seonghwa shot him a look, but the blush creeping up his neck betrayed him. " say's the one who also helped a princess escape."
Wooyoung smirked, unfazed. " touche " he said with a shrug.
" when did you first knew you love yuna Wooyoung?" seonghwa asked, your laughter filling the air.
Wooyoung leaned against the railing, his trademark smirk playing on his lips as he glanced at Seonghwa. But when he noticed your laughter echoing in the background, his grin softened into something more genuine.
"I think it was the first time she threatened to drown me."
Seonghwa’s eyes widened in disbelief as he stared at Wooyoung. "You’re telling me you fell in love with her because she threatened to drown you?" he asked, his voice a mix of incredulity and concern.
Wooyoung, however, seemed entirely unfazed, chuckling under his breath. "What? I like my women spicy," he replied nonchalantly, his grin never faltering. "Yuna was fiery from the start, and that’s what I liked. She wasn’t scared to speak her mind, even if it meant threatening to drag me under."
Seonghwa blinked at him, clearly trying to process the absurdity of it all. "You’re insane, Wooyoung."
Wooyoung just shrugged, still amused by the whole memory. "Hey, it wasn’t just the threat. It was the way she stood her ground. Most people would’ve run off or apologized right away, but not her. She looked me in the eye and said, ‘I’ll drown you if you don’t let me go,’ and I respected that."
Seonghwa sighed, rubbing his temples as he let the words sink in. "Only you, Wooyoung."
"Well, yeah," Wooyoung said, flashing a playful grin. "But you can’t say it didn’t work. I’m still here."
Seonghwa glanced at Yuna, who was laughing with you at the edge of the water. His expression softened slightly, despite the ridiculousness of Wooyoung’s words. "I think we all know you’re a lost cause when it comes to Yuna," he muttered under his breath.
Wooyoung caught the look in Seonghwa’s eyes and nudged him lightly with his elbow. "Don’t look at me like that, Hwa. You know how it is. Once you meet someone like her, there’s no turning back."
Seonghwa didn’t reply, but the quiet understanding between them was enough. Seonghwa watched as you waved at him, your hair glistening with droplets of water, a soft smile on your face. For a brief moment, there was a quiet tenderness in his gaze before it was interrupted by Luna, who tackled you into the water with a loud splash. Seonghwa couldn’t help but chuckle at the playful chaos unfolding in front of him. Yeah, he knew you would be the one.
----
" alright, now that we are on port. Seonghwa and yn will be the ones to head to the market and get our supplies. You four are to stay here. understood." Hongjoong said, glaring at the wooyoung, yeosang, yuna and luna.
The crew stood in silence, their attention on Hongjoong as he issued his orders. Wooyoung, Yeosang, Yuna, and Luna exchanged looks, none of them exactly thrilled with the captain’s decision, but they didn’t argue. Hongjoong's tone left little room for protest.
"Understood, Captain," Seonghwa said smoothly, his voice carrying the weight of authority, though he kept his expression neutral. He shot a quick glance at you, offering a faint smile that was more reassuring than anything.
"Yeah, yeah, we got it," Wooyoung muttered, crossing his arms as he leaned against the railing, clearly less than thrilled with being left behind. "But don’t take too long, alright? We’ll get bored without you two."
Yuna rolled her eyes, though her lips twitched in a smile. "I swear, Wooyoung, you act like we're going on some grand adventure. It's just supplies."
"You don’t understand," Wooyoung responded dramatically. "I need my entertainment."
Luna, standing beside Yuna, snorted with laughter, shaking her head. "You always need entertainment, Wooyoung."
Hongjoong ignored their banter, his eyes sharp as he turned toward you and Seonghwa. "Get what we need and don’t get distracted. Keep it quick, and be back by sundown."
"Of course, Captain," you replied, giving Hongjoong a small but respectful nod.
Seonghwa gave Hongjoong a quick salute, and with that, the two of you made your way down the gangplank, stepping onto the bustling port. The air was filled with the scent of fresh fish, spices, and the sounds of merchants calling out their wares. The market was as lively as ever, a perfect mix of locals and travelers all haggling over goods.
As you moved through the bustling market with Seonghwa by your side, you couldn’t help but notice the way his hand hovered just above your hood, always careful to make sure it stayed securely in place. His attention to detail, the way he made sure you were safe and concealed, was endearing in its own way. It was as if the world could fall apart around him, but he would never let anything harm you—no matter how small the threat.
Your heart fluttered a little as he moved closer, his presence a calm anchor in the sea of noise and chaos around you. You could feel the slight brush of his fingers near your hood every now and then as he adjusted it, making sure it stayed tucked perfectly, hidden from the prying eyes of the market.
"Seonghwa," you began softly, your voice a little more than a whisper to avoid drawing attention. "You’re really careful, aren’t you?"
He glanced at you, a faint smile tugging at his lips. "It’s better this way. I don’t want anyone to notice you—especially not now."
There was something about the way he said it, so matter-of-factly, that made your chest tighten with a mix of appreciation and something deeper. It wasn’t just about keeping your identity a secret; it was about looking out for you, taking care of you without question.
"Thank you," you whispered, the words soft but meaningful. You weren’t sure why, but something about the way he was being so attentive made your heart race, the fluttering growing in intensity as you kept walking beside him.
Finally heading back, seonghwa pulled you aside - taking you a different route. Seonghwa gently pulled you to the side, his hand briefly grazing your arm as he steered you away from the main road. You shot him a curious glance, wondering why he was taking a different route back to the ship.
"Seonghwa?" you asked softly, your voice filled with a quiet question as you glanced back toward the main thoroughfare. "Why are we going this way?"
Seonghwa's smile was soft, but there was a hint of mischief in his eyes. "Taking the scenic route," he repeated, his voice a little more playful now. "Seems fitting, don't you think? A quiet walk before we get back to the chaos of the ship."
You couldn't help but smile back at him, the tension easing just a little as the humor in his tone reached you. "I suppose you’re right. It’s nice to have a moment of peace."
He nodded, his gaze lingering on you for a brief moment before he continued, guiding you along the less-traveled path. "We don’t always get those on board, do we? But sometimes, it’s good to slow down... even if only for a little while."
As you walked beside him, the atmosphere felt lighter, more relaxed. The market’s noise was a distant memory now, replaced by the sound of your footsteps on the cobblestone and the faint rustling of the wind. It was a rare, calm moment, one you found yourself savoring in his company.
"Are you always this careful with everyone?" you asked, teasing lightly but also genuinely curious.
Seonghwa chuckled softly, the sound warm and comforting. "Not always," he admitted with a shrug. "But I’ve learned to look out for the people who matter."
His words lingered in the air between you two, and for a moment, you both walked in silence, the unspoken connection between you growing with each step.
As you neared the ship again, you felt a little reluctant to let go of this calm moment. But Seonghwa’s steady presence beside you made the transition back to the chaos of the crew feel a little more manageable.
"Thank you, Seonghwa," you said again, your voice sincere. "For everything."
He glanced at you, his smile softening even more, and for a brief moment, you saw something deeper in his eyes, something that made your heart flutter again.
Your breath hitched as Seonghwa's arm wrapped tightly around your waist, pulling you in closer. The world around you seemed to blur as his presence filled your senses. His proximity, his warmth—it all felt so overwhelming, and yet comforting in a way you couldn't quite explain.
Your eyes locked for a brief moment, your heart racing as you felt the heat between you grow. His gaze softened, but there was something intense in it, something that made the air between you both crackle with unspoken words. The space between your faces closed, your noses brushing lightly, sending a shiver down your spine.
You took a steadying breath, the pulse in your chest quickening as you made the decision. In a sudden movement, you pulled Seonghwa closer, closing the gap between you. His breath caught in his throat as your lips were mere inches away, the heat of your bodies pressing against each other. The world around you seemed to stop for a brief moment, leaving only the intensity of this connection.
Seonghwa’s eyes widened, surprised by the sudden boldness, but there was no hesitation in his actions. His arm tightened around your waist, pulling you in even closer as if he’d been waiting for this moment, too.
The closeness between you two was undeniable now. Your hearts beat in sync, and as you tilted your head slightly, your lips finally brushed against his. The kiss was soft at first, tentative, as if testing the waters. But it quickly deepened, the warmth of his lips, the pressure of his touch—everything about the moment was magnetic.
Seonghwa's hand slid to the back of your neck, holding you gently but firmly as the kiss grew more intense, more urgent. You responded in kind, feeling the sparks of connection surge through your veins, the tension that had built over time finally being released in this single act.
The world faded away as the two of you were lost in the moment, the only things that mattered being the closeness, the intimacy, the feeling of finally crossing the line that had always been just out of reach.
When you finally pulled away, breathless and with hearts still racing, Seonghwa’s gaze was intense, his chest rising and falling with each deep breath. His forehead rested against yours as he whispered, voice hushed, "I've wanted that... for so long."
You swallowed, your fingers still lightly tracing his jaw. "Me too," you admitted quietly, your voice shaky but filled with the truth of the moment.
Seonghwa gave you a soft, crooked smile, his eyes softening as he leaned in to kiss you once more, but this time, slower, as if savoring every moment.
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i-cant-sing · 5 months ago
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Time Traveller AU part 10
Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here. Part 4 is here. Part 5 is here. Part 6 is here. Part 7 is here. Part 8 is here. Part 9 is here. Time Traveller au masterlist is here. Check out my MASTERLIST for more!
Part 11 is here!
You dont know why you're crying.
No.
You do know why you're crying. You dont understand why you're crying for that reason.
You've been sitting out on the balcony after Mehmed confessed to you, crying like a child who'd been yelled at by their favourite teacher- quietly and shamefully.
"Y/n?" You quickly wipe your tears away as you hear him.
Ibrahim tilts his head as he walks in front of you, his concern growing as he sees your teary eyes on your veiled face. "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"
You sniffle, shaking your head.
"Then?" He notices your mismatched niqaab, the red color reminding him of the torn shirt of Mehmed he saw earlier. "Did something happen with Mehmed?"
You freeze, then nod.
He takes a deep breath before sitting beside you, keeping a respectable distance between you two.
"I know you might be thinking that he's a prince so he wont get in trouble for what he did, but I'm the grand vizir and the sultan's closest friend." He looks at you. "I can help you if you tell me what he did to make you cry."
"I... I am not crying because of Mehmed." You pause. "Mehmed confessed his love for me."
"And you're overwhelmed? Or do you not want his love?" Ibrahim asked cautiously.
"Of course I dont want his love, its just- it reminded me of someone." You close your eyes and immediately those blue orbs flash to your mind. "Someone from... the past."
"Did you love him?" Your eyes snapped open.
"What?"
"This person you talk of... did you love him?" Ibrahim asked.
"I..." Did you? Did you really love him? Even after what he did to you, did you still love him?
"I used to." You sniffled. "You dont love him anymore? Then why are you crying?"
Yeah. Why am I crying if I dont love him anymore?
"I guess... I just miss him. And the memories we made, the way he made me feel." You whisper.
Ibrahim looked ahead at the dark sky, clear and filled with stars. "Go to him then."
You shake your head, frowning. "I cant." You wipe the tears from your eyes. "Pasha, how do I... how do I stop Mehmed? I cant, I cant be with him. In any capacity."
"I'm working on finding a way out for you, Y/n. I promised I'd keep you safe, didnt I?" Ibrahim's determined face put you at ease somewhat.
"Just tell me."
"In due time." He looked back at the sky. "The weather is nice tonight, not humid like yesterday."
You follow his gaze to the sky. "It rained earlier." You take a deep breath, trying to inhale the sweet earthy smell of rain.
There's a word for it. Petrichor.
You looked at the man beside you when you felt movement. Ibrahim had removed his turban and loosened the collar of his kaftan. He ran a hand through his thick hair with his eyes closed as a breeze of air passed, and you saw his shoulders relax.
The wind blew your niqaab as well, lifting it just long enough for you to smell the cool air.
"You should feel air as well." He said with his eyes closed. "It'll relax your mind."
He was referring to your veil and hijab. "You have the privilege to do that. Dont show off." You smiled.
He opened his eyes and stared at you. "I'm all relaxed now. You can enjoy the privilege now." He wore his turban back and fixed his collar. "Go ahead. I'll keep a look out." He stood up before smiling down at you with... warmth. Kindness.
"Enjoy these moments when you can, Y/n. They're rare."
You watched Ibrahim walk away and true to his word, he turned away from you and kept guard while you cautiously removed your niqaab first, and then loosened your headscarf.
You closed your eyes as the cool air hit you gently. You couldnt help the sigh that escaped you when you felt it on your neck, cooling it. And how long had it been since you felt the air breeze in your hair?
Too long.
After a few more moments in silence, you finally stood up after wearing your hijab and veil and turned to him.
Ibrahim turned around when he felt your presence behind him.
"Feeling better?" You nod. "Significantly. Thank you, pasha."
He gave you a courteous smile with a slight bow of his head.
Ibrahim escorted you back to your room and bid you good night before returning to the balcony.
He sat down on the same bench as the cold wind breezed, and he closed his eyes, your face haunting his mind.
When he opened his eyes, he saw the dark clouds in the sky. A few moments later, it began raining again.
Ibrahim raised his hands to make a prayer, after all- it is said in hadith that supplication made during rain is not rejected.
With sincere intention, he made a silent prayer in his heart.
"Oh Allah, make space in Y/n's heart for me.
I would like to reside eternally in my home country.
Amen."
-
The next two weeks went by... not uneventful. You tried your best to avoid the royals, but with Mihirmah bringing in Mehmed everytime you came to teach her, and Mustafa bringing you more broaches (which Mihirmah took from you everytime) because he thought they suited you (you're pretty sure this is his way of staking his claim on you, there's no way he doesnt know Mihirmah is the one taking them when she openly flaunts them in his face.)
Baris has been as annoying as ever, pestering you for gossip and to tell him "which prince you like more so that he can win the bets".
"So what exactly did you say when sehzade Mehmed said "I love you?" Baris asked as he looked through your closet.
You were looking out the window. "Thank you."
"Thank you? You said "thank you?" God, how dumb are you?" He shook his head while you smiled, looking outside but your mind was somewhere else, somewhere behind in time.
"I love you." He repeated, eyes still twinkling at how you continued to become flustered.
You opened your mouth and then closed it like an idiot, not knowing how to reply.
"Thank you." You finally said, looking anywhere but at him. He burst into a fit of laughter. "Oh god- I tell you- I love you and you say "thank you"? You really are something out of this world!" Baldwin teased you, making you huff.
"Y/n!" Your head whipped around the annoyed eunuch. "What?"
"We have to go to the harem." "Harem? Whatever for?"
"To make you learn a sensual dance for the princes- what do you think?! Its Friday! The sultan and sehzade have gone to the mosque for the Friday prayer- they'll be coming back soon and we have to welcome them." You scowled but followed him outside before halting.
"Both of the sehzade are gone?" Baris nodded.
Oh good. "Baris, you go ahead. I'll join you later." You turned around to leave but he grabbed your forearm.
"Absolutely not! Where are you going? What are you upto?" He gave you a pointed look.
You tried to pull your arm away. "Baris please-"
"No." He tightened his grip. "You might as well tell me because I'm not letting you go alone."
Your shoulders slumped.
"I have to find something." He raised a brow. "Do you remember that room where you found me and sehzade Mustafa? The one where his loot from his last conquest was present?" He nodded.
"Well, I need to go there again." "Why, exactly?" You resisted the urge to inhale as you told him your excuse.
"Because... I have to look for a present for Mustafa."
"What?" His grip on your arm loosened.
You shrugged. "You were right. I like Mustafa and if I plan on marrying him one day, I need to find something to impress him. So if I were to look at his loot, perhaps I'd be able to find what he likes."
Baris studied your face for a few moments before grinning. "I knew you were a just keeping this pious woman charade for personal gain." You frowned at his statement. "Fine. But I'm coming along."
"No, you dont need-"
"I wasnt asking." He began walking ahead of you. "Besides, the loot was moved from that room."
You followed behind him. "Moved where?"
The corner of his lips quirked up. "To sehzade Mustafa's room." He turned to look at your drained expression, and waved you off. "Its fine. I'm with you, arent I? The guards will let us pass through and everyone in the family is busy getting ready to welcome the sultan. No one will catch us."
True to his word, none of the guards or servants stopped you two from entering the Mustafa's wing of the palace. They all seemed to either respect Baris a lot to let you two breeze past them, or they feared him. And knowing Baris and his knowing eyes that probably have dirt on everyone, you knew the latter was true.
"Baris." You stopped him from following you inside Mustafa's room. "You stand here and keep watch. I'll go check."
"Keep watch? What are you- trying to steal his undergarments-" You slapped a hand on his mouth. "Do you ever shut up?" You snapped at his amused eyes. "Stand here and keep watch." You ordered before entering the room.
It was true that you did indeed need Baris to keep a look out for anyone walking in on you, as it has happened way too many times now, but you also needed him out of sight when you got rid of the stupid portrait.
Ah yes, your portrait that Baldwin had so lovingly commissioned and had managed to survive over 400 years and you needed to get rid of before it became a part of history permanently.
You looked around his large room, spotting a cloth covered pile in the corner. You marched to it and lifted the pile, recognising the loot. However, you didnt find your portrait in it.
Where is it?
You turned around to leave, only to freeze at the sight of the person standing there.
Mahidevran sultana.
All the other times you'd been caught, by Suleiman, by Mustafa- you always dropped your head into a courtesy. But now, with Mahidevran standing there with no expression on her face yet the daunting aura coming off her in waves- it had you frozen in spot.
You opened your mouth. Then closed it.
What do you say when you're caught red handed in a prince's chambers?
Mahidevran took a deep breath.
"Have you stolen it?"
You blinked.
"S-sultana?" Stolen what?
She raised an eyebrow, clasping her hands as she continued to put you under her sharp gaze.
"Have you stolen what you came for? What exactly were you looking for? Mustafa's gold? His jewels?" She tilted her head. "Dont try to deny that you didnt come here for nothing-"
"I did." Your throat went dry as her eyes narrowed. "I did come here for something. But I'm not stealing anything. I... am trying to earn it."
"And what exactly would be that?"
"Sehzade Mustafa's respect." God, where do I come up with such bull-
It was Mahidevran's turn to blink. Earn Mustafa's respect?
"I... dont know if I love the sehzade, but I do admire him. A lot. He has been very kind to me, very civil to me and... he's gifted me a lot. Not just with his expensive jewels, but also with his company. I just thought- I just wanted to return the favour. And I came here to learn more about him- to find out about his likes and dislikes."
At the end of your explanation, a small smile formed on Mahidevran lips.
"Then you should've just come to me." She walked upto you, her eyes much gentler than the hostility they held just moments ago. "Who would know him better than his own mother?"
You could only offer her a courteous smile and nod in agreement.
"Come now. I will teach you everything there is to know about Mustafa. I know him better than I know myself." She beckoned you to follow her, her heart beaming with pride at you finally making a real effort to pursue her son. Soon everything will fall into place, Mustafa will marry you and you'll give him his heirs and Suleiman will make him the next sultan and then finally, Mustafa will kill his brothers and Hurrem's reign will end.
As you walked out of his chambers, you saw Baris smirking and you knew instantly he didnt alert you about Mahidevran's arrival on purpose. He set you up. Just like Isabella, he will betray you every chance he gets.
But... where did the portrait go?
-
"Would you like to go out today?" Mustafa had decided to take you out of the palace, after Mahidevran told him to spend more time with you. He knew taking you out would make you happy, at least you dont seem to be so tense with him. With his father's permission, who was more than happy to accompany Mustafa to his province- Manisa for a few days. After all, you did deserve a short break from teaching his little sister.
And with Mehmet gone on a conquest, it was hard for Mihirmah alone to stop either of you from leaving and spending time together.
You happily agreed, at least this would give you more freedom to explore escape routes and fix your time machine?
Once again in disguises, Mustafa gave you a small tour of his province and you had to admit, he did a fantastic job managing Manisa all by himself. You definitely saw his administrative skills, how he improved the economy and even prepared the province for any future disasters.
After handling some official matters, Mustafa was surprised to see you waiting for him at the stables.
"Would you like to go hunting?" You asked, brushing the horses's mane.
Hunting? As a woman?
"You know how to hunt?"
"No."
"Then...?"
"I may not know how to hunt, but you do. So... shall we?" You asked patting the horse.
Mustafa helped you up on the horse. "Are you sure? Its not season yet, so it'll be hard to find any animals to hunt."
"Who said anything about animals?" You chuckle before galloping away.
It took him a few moments to shake out of the shock to understand your challenge. And then he mounted his horse and sped off after you.
Mustafa had never chased after anyone, much less a woman, but he had to admit- this was fun. And more than that, he was actually surprised at how good you were at riding. Your head leaned down into a straight line with your back, your calculated decisions when to stand and when to sit, you were far ahead of him. And he understood it wasnt your first time on a horse either.
Fortunately for you, you had both practical knowledge of physics and streamlining, as well as hours- DAYS of horseback riding from your time in Jerusalem. Just about four centuries ago?
However, Mustafa was still more skilled in horse riding and after finally catching upto you, he all but brought you to a halt when he blocked your path.
You both stared at each other, heaving and trying to catch your breath before breaking out into a laughter.
Thats how the two spent most of your time, riding and hunting small animals, Mustafa being in his element when he taught you archery, holding you close yet not uncomfortably, as he helped you aim bullseye. And somehow, you would soon hit the bullseye in his heart.
"And then, Qasim took the blame for me!" Mustafa laughed as you told him about your shenanigans from your childhood. You two were having dinner and after spending so much time together, making conversation had become so much easier.
"He took care of you, didnt he?" You nodded, smiling fondly at the mention of Qasim.
"As all elder brothers do, he was the best." Noticing the sadness in your eyes, Mustafa carefully asked you.
"So, you have no family left?" You shake your head. "No, they were all killed by some bad people. I only narrowly escaped them and found refuge with my grandparents before... before the Janissaries came and took me from them. And... here I am now."
Mustafa's heart wrench slightly. He knows the importance of family.
"I could take you to see them." He offered, but his expression turned puzzled when you turned him down.
"I appreciate that but... no. I cant meet them again, it'll be too much for them. The wound is still fresh, Mustafa. And if they were to see me again only to be taken away from them, accompanied by the Janissaries- they wouldnt recover. I wont hurt them again." You whispered the last part, looking off into the distance as you remembered the old couple who helped you.
"Maybe... maybe when we return home, we can go to the market again. Maybe I'll see them there, just from a distance?" Mustafa nodded at your request. How could he say no to such an innocent ask?
"How do you like Manisa?" Mustafa changed the subject.
You nodded in approval. "I had heard about how well you've done here, but when I saw the city... I must say I am very impressed, sehzade."
"You sound surprised. Did you not think I would be a good governor?" He teased as he poured you some tea. You chuckled.
"I am not surprised. I am proud." He froze. "It definitely takes a lot to run a province properly, especially when you have a lot of pressure on you, not just from the sultan but from the very people you're responsible for. And while you have managed the finances as well as put a stop to all revolts, crushed the rebels- all amazing feats, but what really stands out for me is that you've earned the love."
"Love?" "Mmhm. Its very easy to be in a position of power and make people fear you. But its much harder to have their love. And... I'm very pleased to tell you that I have not heard one word, not a single person who had anything except praises for sehzade Mustafa."
"I am very proud of you, Mustafa." You stated, your eyes smiling from your veil.
Mustafa felt as if time had stopped.
I am very proud of you, Mustafa.
Those words, that praise... isnt that what he's yearned for all his life? Sure, Mahidevran may have said those words to him many times, but she's his mother. She always sings his praises.
I am very proud of you, Mustafa.
His father has never said it to him, but he's heard Suleiman say it to Mehmed.
With his younger brother, Mehmed, Mustafa understands that Suleiman may love him just a bit more than him. Truly, Mustafa loves Mehmed too. Its natural for him to feel affection for his younger brother.
But... doesnt he deserve to be praised by his father too? Doesnt he have the right to get a pat on his shoulder for a job well done? Or is it just "his duty as a prince" everytime he works hard? Or is it that no matter what he does, how well he does it, he'll never earn Suleiman's priority over Mehmed because his father loves Hurrem more than Mahidevran? Because of his mother? Still, she is his first wife. And still, he is Suleiman's first born. Doesnt he ever deserve to even delude himself that he has a chance at being the next sultan? At being chosen?
"Mustafa?" Your soft voice breaks him out of his trance.
"Sorry, you were saying?" He tried to smile, his mind still plagued by his previous thoughts.
You point at the box you had place in front of him. "I got you a small present, for all the times I um- lost your brooches." You coughed and he chuckled, shaking his head.
"I know Mihirmah was the one taking them from you. You dont have to lie to me, Y/n." Amusement twinkled in his eyes as he picked up your box.
You smiled sheepishly. Hey, you're glad that he isnt mad at you for that spoilt brat stealing his gifts off you.
Upon opening the box, Mustafa's grin widened as a small chuckle escaped him.
Its a small crocheted rose, a pin dangling for him to attach it to his collar.
"I know its useless next to your precious jewelled brooches and even though your mom was more than happy to give me some jewels, I wanted to give you something different. You dont have to wear it-"
"Will you place it on me?" Mustafa cut you off. You nodded as you moved closer to him and took the rose from him. "Where should I put it? Turban? Collar? Chest?"
"Wherever it'll be the most prominent." He smiled gently. You leaned closer as you carefully pinned the rose to his chest.
Mustafa held his breath as he stared at your focused eyes, and he doesnt remember the last time he was so attentive to studying someones eyes. He never realised how long your lashes were, or the crease in your eyelid, or the different shades in your eye, or the way his heart skipped a beat when you looked up at him, or the way his heart warmed when your pupils dilated and he was ready to give you the world if you asked for it.
"Perfect." He whispered as you finished placing the rose on him, but his eyes never left yours.
He finally broke out of the trance when you moved away, averting your eyes and he figured he must've been too obvious.
"Thank you." He cleared his throat before looking down at his rose. "How did you learn to... embroidery?" He changed the subject once more.
"This isnt embroidery. Its crochet." You explain to him that you learned it from your mother, which is true. Your mother, who despite having a degree in STEM, had to work as a seamstress when she moved back to your hometown to make ends meet. Only thing you left out was that your mother hated crocheting, and she only did it when she was mad, so anytime you spotted a crocheted sweater or scarf or anything, you knew your mom was having a bad day. It was ironic at how something so cute could come out of such a negative emotion, but perhaps thats what she was trying to teach you. She wanted you to channel out your negative energy into something beautiful and to be honest, crocheting did relax you because of how long it took and how repetitive it was. By the time you were done crocheting, you had processed your emotions and kept yourself in check AND now had an adorable, soft product to play with.
(Deep down you knew she was worried from how many times you had decided to use your brain to come up with elaborate pranks to get back at people. So, as mom would say- "crochet your anger away, Y/n.")
Mustafa smiled at your memories.
"I would like to give you something as well, Y/n. Ask for anything." You tried to refuse but upon his insistence, you finally sighed exaggeratively, as if this wasnt exactly what you wanted.
"Do you remember that portrait? The one in your loot when we first met?"
Mustafa nodded. "I do. But unfortunately, I had given it away to a Roman diplomat as goodwill." He watched your shoulders drop.
"Ask me for something else." He offered again but you waved him off, saying you dont want anything else at the moment.
By the time you two left Manisa, Mustafa had decided that he was going to marry you.
He likes you, he doesnt know if you love him but he does know for sure that you respect. And he respects you.
Respect. Isnt it more important than love? Not all relationships, not all marriages are out of love, Mustafa knows that. But any good marriage can only work if both parties respect each other, if they trust each other.
His father loves Mahidevran, some part of him still does love her despite marrying Hurrem. And he's sure that a small part of him loved every concubine his father slept with, but... not everyone had his respect.
No, Suleiman only loved AND respected Hurrem. He loved Mahidevran, but he didnt respect her. If he did, he wouldnt have humiliated her by marrying Hurrem, a slave, He wouldnt have humiliated her by having five kids with the same woman while neglecting his mother. He wouldnt have humiliated Mustafa by favouring Mehmed over him at every chance.
Mustafa doesnt have Suleiman's respect.
But he has yours. And his mother's. And of the people of Manisa. And that is enough for him.
Thumbing the crocheted rose, he could only hope you dont mind that he lied to you about the portrait. Its in his chambers, here in Manisa. For him to stare at, to clear his mind as he peered into those eyes above the paint smudges, that looked eerily similar to yours.
-
On returning to Constantinople (present day known as Istanbul), Mustafa had allowed you two first stop at the market as per your request of buying some souvenirs for the family, but he knew that was just an excuse for you to see your grandfather.
He watched you spot the old man in the market as you stood by the blacksmith, buying a dagger for Mihirmah despite your eyes being trained on the sad man who was busy buying vegetables. You two were still in disguises, with the guards undercover as well, when there was a commotion.
Your grandfather was being harassed by the same merchant who had given him money and Mustafa would like to think that he interfered because it was his duty as a Muslim and as a sehzade to stop evil, but deep down, he knows he only stepped in to impress you.
Mustafa and a couple of the Janissaries, all disguised as civilians, walked upto the merchant and pushed him off the old man. Before the merchant could start heckling, Mustafa threw a pouch of gold coins and told him that the debt is paid. Period.
He didnt have to say out loud the outcome if he bothered your old man again.
By the time Mustafa returned by your side, standing tall as you looked at him gratefully.
I am proud of you, Mustafa.
"Thank you." You tell him, and Mustafa's heart soars at your validation.
You respect him.
Mustafa looked to the side, the tip of his ears turning pink. "Did you get a present for Mihirmah?"
You nodded, showing him the dagger you bought (with the money Suleiman had been paying you for teaching). He approved it, and you two returned to Topkapi palace, not knowing about the shit storm that was about to come.
-
Mehmet watched from the balcony as you returned to the palace with Mustafa beside you, laughing openly as his elder brother looked at you in a way that he never wanted anyone besides him to look at you.
Mustafa would've liked to walked you to your room but after he was called by his mother, you assured him you'll make it to your room just fine.
What you werent expecting was to find Mehmed standing in the hallway, waiting for you to be alone. He wasnt supposed to return so early from his province, but after Mihirmah wrote to him about you fleeing away with Mustafa to Manisa, he wrapped up his work there and came home straight away. He thought he made it clear what his intentions were with you, but it seems like sweet talking didnt make a dent on you.
"Sehzade-" You stopped your greeting when you saw him march towards you, and you involuntarily took a step back. His body language was not friendly at the moment.
"What were you doing with Mustafa?" He seethed, his arms behind his back as if holding himself back from lashing out.
"I- I went out to get a present for Mihirmah-" You began showing him the dagger but he cut you off.
"Why?"
"Why?" You didnt understand his question. "Why what? I was away in Manisa-"
"Why?"
You frowned this time. What was he asking?
"Because sehzade Mustafa invited me-"
"Why?"
You couldnt help but glare at him annoyed. Why what?
"Because I wanted to get out of the palace-"
"Why?"
"What do you want me to say?" You finally asked. Mehmet glare intensified at your question. "You're clearly accusing me of something, so say it."
"Why did you leave the palace?"
"I told you, I went to Manisa on sehzade's invitation." You paused, trying to piece together the reason for his behaviour. Jealousy? "I couldnt have turned sehzade Mustafa's invitation, it wouldve been rude-"
"This isnt about Mustafa!" He snapped. "You shouldnt have left the palace in the first place!"
"And why not? I'm not a slave who is bound to these walls." You reminded him gently, but his patience seemed to have worn thin.
"And neither is my mother, nor Mihirmah but they still stay here, only leaving when the sultan takes them along."
You looked at him in confusion. What was he getting at?
Mehmed seemed to get even more angry at your bewilderment. "There's a reason women stay in their homes. Its not safe for them out there."
"I appreciate your concern, but I doubt anyone would want to hurt me. I am not a princess or a part of royalty. My status is far too low for anyone to even bat an eye my way-"
He laughed humourlessly. "Status? You think I'm talking about protecting you from enemies of the empire?" Mehmed neared you as you took another step back. "You're in danger from the world. You're in danger from those very men that see you everytime you walk out of these palace walls. You're a walking temptation for these men and their disgusting, vile thoughts."
You blinked at him. Is he- did he just say you tempt men?
"How can I tempt men when I'm covered from head to toe?" You point at your niqaab and your chaddar.
"YOU'RE A WOMAN! THAT ALONE IS TEMPTATION ENOUGH FOR LINGERING EYES!" He yelled as an angry vein pops up in his temple. "It doesnt matter that not an inch of your skin is visible, but the moment these men know that you're a woman, you're meat for them. You attract their attention when you leave the palace walls, you attract their eyes when they see your feminine shadow, you attract their ears when they hear your soft voice, you attract their nose when you pass by them with your sweet scent. Even if they cant see your face, your existence alone is enough to plague their minds!" He points at your niqaab. "This veil that you seem so proud of? That you think protects you from male gaze? It only makes men to want to rip it off you more!"
You're staring at him in utter disbelief. Aint no way- no way this man is accusing you of tempting men, all while insulting your niqaab.
"I dont know what men you're talking about, but you're wrong if you think I'm using my veil, my covered body to invite men to stare at me." Your tone barely suppresses your anger. "I am surprised to hear you say such things. How can you pass such comments when your own mother and sister are-"
"I can pass such comments because my mother and sister stay within the damn palace! They dont go around sauntering like you, provoking men!" He yelled, his arms no longer behind his back, hands balled up into fists.
"Do you hear yourself? You're not making any sense-"
"I AM THE NEXT SULTAN! I AM UNDER NO OBLIGATION TO MAKE SENSE TO YOU!" He spat.
"How can I provoke men when my face is covered?!" You snapped back, reaching your wits.
Hearing your voice get loud, Mehmed's fury reached new levels as he backed you upto the wall, your eyes wide as he closed the distance between you. "You think you're safe?" He whispered harshly, his eyes boring holes into you. His hand reached up and grabbed your niqaab, threatening to yank it off you. "You think this piece of cloth can protect you? What can you- what can you possibly do if I were to rip this off you? Do you think you can stop me from making your worst nightmares come to life?"
Mehmed did not relish the fear in your eyes, nor did he enjoy the tear that escaped them. But like a child who needs admonishing to keep them from harms way, he found it necessary to reprimand you.
"Dont leave the palace again, Y/n." He said, his tone softening but still stern. "I dont want anyone, man or woman to see you. I dont trust anyone around you. Understand?" He patted your cheek to make you nod, and he finally backed away and left you alone in the hall.
Well, you're never truly alone in the palace. Especially when you have enemies. And who is your enemy, Y/n?
Everyone who is envious.
-
Word of your heated moment reached Mahidevran through the servants whispers, about how close you and Mehmed were, how he had pushed you upto the wall, a raunchy scene for anyone to walk in on, how Mehmed had lifted up your veil and traced your skin.
And of course, Mahidevran is inclined to believe these spicy rumors. She's experienced first hand what power hungry women can do when they put their mind to it. And her blood boils at how you're playing both princes, as if Mehmed could ever compete with her precious Mustafa!
Mahidevran all but screams at the maids to bring you to her, her hands shaking at the thought of you cheating on Mustafa- that too just moments earlier Mustafa was telling her how much he liked you and was ready to marry you.
You. You're ruining the plan. The plan to have Mustafa become the next sultan. Because- because you've been put to it by Hurrem, havent you? Isnt that why you're trying to make her son go after you while you pursue Mehmed? You want Mustafa to lose- you want Mahidevran to lose!
When you enter her chambers, Mahidevran all but sees red at the sight of you. You'r thrown to the ground and it doesnt register at first the hard smack she delivered to your face. But as soon as you look up at her, she lunges at you and continues to slap you over and over again, hurling curses at you, calling you all sorts of derogatory names, all while you try to save your face from her assaults because even if you could fight back, you couldnt hurt a sultan's wife.
"HOW CAN YOU CHEAT ON MY MUSTAFA?! MY LION! YOU FUCKING WHORE-!" She shrieked as she continued to slap you, her nails embedding into your skin and scratching it. Your face had gone numb from her slaps, and you couldnt verbalise a response even if you tried, her hands cutting you off everytime you tried to speak, leaving you to just cry and scream.
The guards and servants heard both your cries and Mahidevrans screams, but they didnt dare interfere. How could they? The sultana could easily have their heads chopped off for interrupting her punishment.
Mahidevran's own hands had gone numb from her thrashing, but her anger overtook any sense of self preservation as she continued to beat you to a pulp. Neither of you knows how long it had been until she was pulled off you.
"Mahidevran!" You watched bleary eyed as a red head came into the view. "Have you lost your mind?!" She admonished the queen.
Hurrem turned to look at you, grimacing at your bloodied face.
"Baris." She nodded at him to help you.
Baris immediately picked you up in his arms and carried you out of there.
You watched through tired eyes at Baris's concerned face as he looked down at you.
"Shit- sorry for taking so long to save you." He whispered, watching you slip in and out of consciousness.
You dont remember how, but the next moment you opened your eyes, you were in Hurrem's chambers with Baris tending to your wounds and Hurrem sitting on the ottoman watching you with a steady gaze.
You wince as Baris placed ointment on your busted lip.
"Careful, Baris." Hurrem warned, standing up and walking upto you. "She looks worse enough as it is. We dont need her falling unconscious in front of the sultan because you treated her injuries too harshly. He'll have your head chopped off." She joked though neither you nor Baris laughed; after all her words did hold some truth.
Wait- sultan?
"S-sultan?" You croaked, and Baris quickly helped you drink some water. "Why- why is the sultan coming?"
Hurrem looked at you in confusion. "Why? So that Suleiman could see what Mahideravn did to you and finally get rid of her. After all, Suleiman did warn anyone to not harm you. So, we can finally get rid of that thorn for once and for all." She sighed dreamily before looking at you. "All you have to do is cry in front of him and tell him how cruel Mahidevran is-"
"N-no." Baris's hand that was tending to you scratched cheek halted at your interruption.
"Excuse me?" Hurrem's sharp tone sent shivers down your spine.
"No. I wont say Mahidevran did this to me." In actual history, Mahidevran despite being exiled, outlives Suleiman, Hurrem and all their children. If you were to confess to what Mahidevran did, it would run the risk of Suleiman punishing her to the dungeons or worse, either way putting her life at risk and ruining the timeline.
"But she did do this to you." Hurrem stated, frowning at your attempt at denial. Or was it defense? "Ah, is it because you love Mustafa? You dont want to put his mother in trouble?"
"No. Mahidevran may have hurt me, but sehzade Mehmed was the reason. Your son did this and if you force me to confess, then that is what I will say- Mehmed did this to me." You replied, voice unwavering despite your heart beating loudly against your chest.
"Are you threatening me?" Hurrem glared at your audacity. Baris could sense the impending doom, and he feared you were at the receiving end of it this time.
"No." You swallowed. "I am merely stating at how this will play out. I suggest you dont have the sultan come and see me, better yet- throw me out of this palace altogether."
Hurrem stared at your bruised face and then she saw the determination in your eyes. She shot a look to Baris that had him scurrying you out of the room to give you two privacy.
"Even if you dont rat out Mahidevran, I can."
"You could. And then I will tell the sultan that it didnt happen, and you'll end up looking like a jealous second wife pinning the blame on the first wife." You tell her, watching as her face turned red with fury. "You could always let me go."
"Let you go? Why should I help you leave? And dont try to use Mehmed's behaviour with you as an excuse."
"Behaviour? He ordered me that I dont leave the palace walls ever because he thinks that I seem to invite men to leer at me." You tattled on him. "It may seem hard to believe sultana, but I dont wish to marry any of the princes, nor do I wish to stay within this palace. You know that the only reason I'm still here is because I couldnt say no to the sultan. But if you were to help me escape-"
You were silenced as Mahidevran burst through the door, her eyes zeroing in on Hurrem standing next to you.
"You-! You set me up! Both of you!" She shrieked as she stomped over to you two but Baris walked in with Mustafa, Mehmed and Mihirmah, all looking at the state of your injured face. They all stared at you, but it was Mehmed's eyes that pricked you and you quickly grabbed your veil, tying it around your face to cover it.
Mihirmah rushed to your side, grabbing you by the shoulders. "Y/n! Who did this to you?!"
You didnt bother looking at Hurrem or Mahidevran when you replied.
"I dont know."
Mihirmah's brows knitted together. "You... dont know? It was a blind attack? Did you not see who was attacking you? Or did you just not recognise the attacker?"
You took a deep breath.
"I dont know."
Mehmed stepped forward, eyes narrowing at your answer. "What do you mean-"
He stopped talking when the doors opened again and in walked Suleiman and Ibrahim, the sultan's eyes scanning the room before falling on you.
You had stood up to bow to him and you kept your head down for as long as you could to not draw attention.
But Mihirmah had other plans in mind.
"Dad! Y/n was attacked again! So much worse this time!" She cried, clinging onto your shoulder.
Suleiman's concern grew as he looked you up and down, reading your body language: head down, shoulders tense, hands fumbling.
You were afraid.
"Y/n?" He gently called your name as you hesitantly looked up. Its hard enough to lie to sultan, but lying when you look him dead in the eyes is a whole another thing.
"Show me." He commanded, and you had no choice but to comply, as your slowly removed your veil.
Suleiman's eyes widened at the state of your face- bruised, bloodied and swollen. He walked closer, eyes watching you in disbelief. Who could have done this to you, that too in his palace?
"Who did this to you?"
You averted your eyes, lest they betrayed you. "I- I dont know."
"You didnt see them?" Suleiman was as confused as Mihirmah. "Did they attack you from behind? No- they scarred your face, they attacked you from the front. You should've seen them. Did you recognise them?"
You kept your head down. Shit. What are you supposed to say now?
"Y/n?" You looked up at him. Suleiman saw fear. "Dont be scared. Tell me- who did this to you?"
You swallowed thickly. "I dont know."
"Did you see their face?"
"I- yes." There was no point in lying about it when he already presented logic.
"Then? Who was it?"
"I dont know- I dont remember." You whispered.
Mustafa was trying to make sense of your statement when he glanced at his mother. Mahidevran was shifting on her feet nervously, clasping her hands tightly as she glared at you.
No. No, she couldnt have.
Suleiman's gaze hardened at your words. Who were you protecting? Or did you really not recognise who it was?
"Ibrahim." The vizir stepped forward. "Find out who did this to Y/n." Suleiman ordered as he stood up, turning around to leave when his eyes fell on Mahidevran, who was looking at him with a tight lipped smile.
"Are you alright, Mahidevran?" He asked his first wife, who nodded eagerly.
"Y-yes. Of course, my sultan! I'm just- I'm just worried for Y/n." Suleiman studied her for a few more moments before he turned his attention to Hurrem.
"You did right by informing me about this, Hurrem." He praised his second wife, giving her shoulders a gentle squeeze. "I trust you to take care of Y/n, hm?"
Hurrem bowed her head and feigned a smile. "Of course, Suleiman." However, the sultan spotted her smile faltering and for a second, he saw her glancing at Mahidevran before averting her gaze.
Something was wrong. Suleiman's sixth sense was keeping him unsettled.
He looked at Mahidevran again, this time more closely as he studied her from top to bottom and thats when he saw it-
Her hands hiding under her sleeves.
Suleiman walked to Mahidevran and before anyone could react, he grabbed her hands and pulled.
Mahidevran's knuckles were bruised, her nails stained with your blood, her palms red.
"You did this to her?" He asked in disbelief. His Mahidevran? He knew she was a little unhinged at times, lost control of her emotions but... was she really capable of such violence?
"Suleiman I- she-"
"You're not denying." His grip tightened around her hands. "Mahidevran, have you lost your mind?!"
"Suleiman-"
"SILENCE!" He pushed her away, eyes blown wide in rage. Mahidevran trembled at the sight. "Have you completely lost it?! Why would you do this to her?! She's just a child! What is wrong with you?!"
Mahidevran fell to her knees, begging him for forgiveness. "Suleiman, I'm sorry-"
"Sorry? You're sorry?! LOOK AT HER! LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO HER!" He pointed at your face. "Why did you do this? What could she have possibly done to you to deserve this?"
"Suleiman, I only-" She stopped. What reason could she give? She cant tell him about you cheating on Mustafa with Mehmed, nor would it do her any good to pin the blame on Hurrem now. It would only weaken her position and cause Mustafa trouble.
Mustafa. She has to do this for him, to save his throne.
She mustered up all her courage, casting her ego aside as she looked at you.
"I'm sorry, Y/n."
Your heart dropped. No. Mahidevran just admitted to her crime. Suleiman will punish her. She will die- no, no no-
"Its okay, sultana. It was an accident." Everyone was looking at you now.
"An accident?" Mihirmah asked.
You nodded. "I- I entered her chambers while she was asleep. I startled the sultana, she thought I was an intruder- that I came to attack her. The room was dark- she couldnt have recognised me- it was all an accident."
Everyone knew it was big fat lie, but then again, no one was willing to refute your claims. On what grounds? With no proof, they were all inclined to take your word, even if they didnt believe it.
Suleiman looked back at Mahidevran. "You still didnt have any right to beat her that badly. You've truly lost it, Mahidevran. If you werent Mustafa's mother, I would've-" He took a breath to calm himself down. "You cant stay here anymore. I exile you to Manisa." And with that Suleiman walked out of the room.
-
Mustafa had left your room to see off his mother. He came to you after to thank you for trying to cover for Mahidevran, despite his father still banishing her.
Then again, exile was the least painful punishment for what she did to you.
He held his mother's hands as the servants packed her belongings. He wanted to go to Manisa with her, but she refused to let him accompany her.
"You must stay here, Mustafa." She cupped his cheek. "You need to protect Y/n. All this time, I thought she was cheating on you but Hurrem set her and me up. She wanted this to happen, for me to hurt Y/n! You must stay here and protect Y/n from Hurrem and Mehmed. Do you understand?" Mahidevran's habit of blaming everyone but herself for her actions prevailed over logic as usual.
He nodded, kissing the palm of her hand. "The next time we meet, I will bring her to you as my wife."
A bright smile graced her face as she quickly took off her own ring and gave it to him.
"I will pray for you, my lion." She kissed his forehead. Mustafa smiled, pulling her in for a hug.
"Dont worry about Mehmed, hm? He wont be a hurdle." She whispered to him.
Mustafa didnt understand what she meant about Mehmed, his own mind occupied by you. He saw how angry his father was when it came to you, almost as protective as he was of Mihirmah, how quick he was to have his mother- a queen on her knees, for you. He knew his dad never respected Mahidevran, but his actions were also ruled over by his concern for you.
Mustafa now understands how dire the situation is. He now understands why his mother wanted him to marry you. You- you are the key to having the throne, the key to ruling the empire, the key to everything.
-
While Hurrem was busy "calming" Suleiman down, which in fact was really just her getting praised for being a good wife, queen and most importantly now- "a mother figure to Y/n", for how quickly she took action and saved you from Mahidevran, how she tended to your wounds and brought you to her chambers rather than "risking Mahidevran attacking you by leaving you in the infirmary", her eldest was in your room.
Baris had just helped you sit on the sofa and was tending to your wounds when Mehmed, the sehzade who had just moments ago seen Mustafa leave your room, had his blood boiling at the sight of your face uncovered as Baris applied healing balms to your wounds.
"Get out." He ordered Baris, who looked at you before leaving the room.
Mehmed sat down beside you, picking up the healing balm and was about to apply it to your skin when you turned your face away.
"I can do it myself, sehzade-"
"Mehmed." He corrected you before turning your face to him harshly. "If you can do it yourself, then why let Baris do it? Do you enjoy his touch?" His tone was accusatory and full of jealousy, and you were getting real tired of it.
"I'm sorry, I was far too disoriented to notice it was a man who was tending to my wounds." Your sarcasm made his eyes narrow at you, as he continued to apply the ointment.
"Baris is not a man, he's a eunuch." And yet he's jealous of him. "And its not about a man touching you, i dont want anyone touching my wife-to-be."
"I dont remember agreeing to a proposal-"
"Then let me refresh your memory." He cut you off. "When I said "I love you", I meant we were to be married. As for a proposal, there never was one and there never will be one because I am a sehzade, and the next sultan. You dont get to say no to me. Do I make myself clear?"
If you had the means to get out of this era, you would've slapped the egoistical, chauvinistic, toxic man in front of you.
"Yes." You replied.
Mehmed stood up, but before he left, he looked at your veil.
"If you have to remove your veil to let your injuries heal, you better make sure you're alone."
Asshole.
-
A few weeks later, you were once again standing in the harem with the rest of the royals. Today, the sultan had to leave to go on a conquest. Ibrahim was also leaving, which unnerved you because you dont want to stay in a place without the only sane person who had your back.
Sure, Baris saved you but you knew better than to trust that piece of shit because his loyalty could be easily bought. Just like how you knew Hurrem did indeed was paying him to follow you, let you get beat up, and then fetch her to be your "saviour". And you knew that the only reason Baris would help you ever again, was because he had his own agenda on being your personal servant if you were to marry one of the princes.
Suleiman and Ibrahim entered the harem, ready to receive farewell from his family.
Hurrem was the first in line, kissing his hand and then him, before Suleiman pulled her in his embrace.
"I trust you to take care of the palace in my absence." He said to her, patting her cheek affectionately.
"Of course. I pray for your victory, Suleiman. May Allah sharpen your sword and defeat the enemy." She wished him well.
Suleiman then went down the queue, hugging his sons, daughters, favourite women of the harem, and then you.
"You will be safe here, Y/n." He watched you kiss his ring before bringing his hand to your forehead. With your head bowed, he kissed your the top of your head. "When I return, I have something important I'd like to discuss with you."
Your heart dropped. Discuss something important? Like what?
"Your marriage to his son, girl!" You heard Baris's voice in the back of your head.
Ibrahim only hugged Suleiman's sons, the royal women offering him words of support and prayers. When he reached you, you gave him a quick courtesy and a small prayer, but your eyes- they screamed for help.
Ibrahim! Dont leave me!
And Ibrahim got your message, but with everyone watching, he could do nothing but nod and move on.
As soon Suleiman left with his troops, you quickly made your way to return to your chambers to hide away until they returned. After your incident with Mahidevran, you had taken some precautions from being mauled again because really- who can you trust around here?
Mihirmah would come to your room to get her lessons, which now with her father gone, you doubt she will come to get them. Fine by you really, she's still a brat who finds glee in flipping you over your back.
Mehmed was much harder to avoid, he insisted on having lunch with you (because Hurrem wanted all her kids together with her at dinner). And these lunches were quiet stiff, because Mehmed may not be threatening you or showing off his jealousy, you still havent forgotten his remarks and you didnt really talk besides giving him curt replies, which he doesnt notice because his head is so far up his-
Mustafa was the normal one among them, and while he did offer you to take you out to the market or even the gardens, you didnt. Not because you were scared of Mehmed finding out, no. It was because- well, what happened to Mahidevran. Mustafa may have come to you and thanked you for trying to cover up for her, but no matter what way you see it- his mother was thrown out of the palace because of you.
And he has to hold some grudge against you for it. No matter how much he smiles, how many gifts he gives you, you just cannot risk him taking you the gardens or the market where there are no witnesses when "someone" ambushes you.
You've used most of your time holed up in your room with your time machine because the last time you went out with Mustafa to the market, you were able to get some tools and metals from the blacksmith while Mustafa was busy saving your "grandfather".
-
Its been 2 weeks since Suleiman left. Two weeks since you've been on high alert around this mad house, two weeks since you started losing sleep from all the stress and tension of being around Mehmed and Mustafa. Sure, Ibrahim gave you a entourage of maids and guards to keep you safe before he left, but how could that put you at ease when your entourage could fall with the flick of the wrist from these royals.
You've been able to repair your time machine as much as you could, but it still hasnt worked. You dont understand what you need to do, you've even tried smashing it against the ground like the last time you transported, but no. It didnt help.
You sat on the bench on the balcony, the same one when Ibrahim was here with you. You came here to get some fresh air, and you hoped Baris doesnt run into you because you just have it in you to hear him make a comment about the bags under your eyes.
The sky was filled with dark clouds again, the wind chilly and you smiled under your veil.
It was going to rain today.
Your mind flashed back to the last time you were here with Ibrahim. Just like now, you were worried and tense then. But he was there to calm you down, to put your mind to ease.
"You should feel air as well." He said with his eyes closed. "It'll relax your mind."
You closed your eyes as his voice came to mind.
"Enjoy these moments when you can, Y/n. They're rare."
You glanced behind you, at your entourage. The guards had their back to you, looking away from you and the maids. The maids all stood behind you, giving you space. They could see your stress.
A gentle breeze hit your face, and it was enough to push you.
You quietly removed your veil, setting it beside you before loosening up your headscarf.
A sigh escaped your lips as the gentle breeze cooled your neck, your tense shoulders dropping at the earthy scent of rain. You closed your eyes, trying to imagine yourself back in your time, back when you were a child, carefree and stress-free.
Home. I want to go home.
"Y/N!" Your respite was cut short by Mehmed's angry scream, who looked at you like he'd just witnessed the greatest crime you could ever commit: sitting unveiled, with part of your hair exposed along with your neck.
"What the hell are you doing?!" You quickly grabbed your niqaab and tied it around your head as you saw storm towards you, his guards following behind him.
"Mehmed- I-"
"You what?! You were sitting here EXPOSED! With the servants to watch!" He yelled at you, grabbing your arm painfully as he yanked you from your seat. "Didnt I explicitly tell you to fucking stay covered! Do you like putting on a show for-"
"ENOUGH!" Something in you snapped. "I wont have you accuse me over and over again! I was not putting on a show, Mehmed! I was just getting some air! Do I not deserve it?! As for putting on a show- the guards had their backs turned, they werent staring at me! Only the maids were behind me, and they too werent able to see my face! Now, let go!"
Mehmed's grip on your arm only tightened, and you almost yelped in pain if you werent so busy glaring at him. "Just because you think they didnt see you face, doesnt mean its alright for you to sit naked!" He yanked you closer as he bared his teeth at you. "I told you not to to ever remove your niqaab in front of others. You disobeyed me- my command! And now you will pay the price! As will they!" He yelled at his guards to arrest you entire entourage and throw them to the dungeons.
"Mehmed, stop-" "Shut up!" He yelled as he began dragging you away and towards his own room, throwing you inside.
He stalked towards you. "Since you seem to have no sense of preservation for your modesty, I suppose I will have to help you out as your husband-to-be. You will stay here until I return and if you try to escape, I swear to God, Y/n! I will fucking break your legs!"
You watched in horror as he left the room, locking it from outside and you dont doubt he had guards outside not to let anyone in or out.
I cant stay here any longer- I cant rely on Ibrahim any longer. Mehmed has fucking lost it, and I need to get out of here right now.
You fumble out your time machine, trying to turn it on to any time period really- you cant stay here anymore.
"Fuck!" You throw it against the wall, crying into your hands out of frustration. Why the fuck wont it work? A few moments later, you finally pick it up, pocketing it back in your clothes.
Hours passes by as you sat on the floor, crying at your demise, waiting for Mehmed to return and do whatever his insane self pleases.
The room had darkened, and you suspected it was night now. You look down and find the bracelet on your hand, the one Suleiman gave you and an idea popped in your head.
Bribery.
You knocked at the door.
"Hello? Whoever is out there- please- just open the door! I'll give you my jewels! Anything you need, I'm willing to pay!" You plead for a few minutes before slamming your hands against the wood, falling to your knees as you sobbed. "Please! I'm begging you! Help me-!" You stumbled back as the doors swung open.
"Well, if this is how quickly you resort to going on your knees, I have failed as a teacher." Baris grinned at you from above.
"B-baris?" You sniffled as he helped you stand up. "What are you-"
"I'm saving your ass. Duh." He pulled you out of the room, looking out both ways before taking the path on the left. You spot two guards lying on the ground.
"How did you-" You point at the them but he drags you along.
"I'm not just a pretty face, Y/n. You seriously underestimate me." He comments, his eyes scanning for anymore people. "Now we must make haste. Otherwise, your lover boy may take a break from the dungeons to torture us instead-" He stopped talking when he looked at you.
"Torture? Baris, what did Mehmed do to them?" Your entourage was thrown into the dungeons. Baris avoided your eyes. "Baris." You insisted.
"He's having their eyes stitched up for staring at you."
You face paled. Mehmed is insane. He's fucking insane. Baris took your hand and dragged your shellshocked body.
The two of you soon made it out of the palace undetected. 4 horses and 5 women waited for you two there. You recognised them- they were from the harem.
"Baris, what are you- why are they here?" You whispered harshly. If the palace finds out there are concubines missing, it'll only cause more trouble for you and him.
"Relax, they're here to help us." He waves at them, making them giggle before he looks back at you. "We will all get on the horses and take different paths to throw the Janissaries off long enough for you to escape."
"Escape to where?"
"Wherever you want to go. I would suggest going West and leaving the empire altogether, maybe go to the Romans. Keep a low profile and try not to seduce any more unhinged men." He pokes fun at you, despite the situation you're in.
You chuckle, tears of gratefulness in your eyes. "Thank you, Baris." You sniffle, taking off your bracelet. "Here. You can have this. Its the least I can do-"
"Girl, you need it more than I do." Baris pushes the bracelet back to you. "Besides, I've already been compensated generously."
"By who?" You ask and he gives you a knowing look. "Ibrahim?" He nods.
"He had been paying me since the moment you set foot in the palace to keep you safe. You think I just stuck around you because I like you so much?" You slapped his shoulder, making him laugh. "Okay, you werent all that bad. But wherever you go, I'm sure Ibrahim pasha will find you."
"And why is that?"
"Well, he was going to marry you." "What?" Baris looked at you confused. "You dont know? Ibrahim pasha talked to Sultan Suleiman about this. The sultan gave his blessing, but he wanted to ask for your consent as well. But then they went to war-"
So thats what Suleiman wanted to discuss with you.
"Anyways, Ibrahim pasha had given me permission to do whatever is necessary to keep you safe, even if it meant taking you out of the palace- or- well staging your kidnapping. When the time comes, Ibrahim pasha will find you and I will be long gone by then." Baris explained.
"You're willing to leave the palace behind? For me? I thought you liked it here." You were touched at his willingness to help you, even if he was taking money.
Baris shrugged, looking at Topkapi palace longingly. "I've had my fun here. Its time for me to go somewhere else. Have a fresh start, where I'm no longer a slave."
You smiled, nodding understandingly. "And them? Are they willing to risk it all for me as well?"
"Oh no. They're in love with me. And when they heard I was leaving, they decided to come along. Just cant get enough of me." You shot him a look. "We might start a brothel. You should come visit with Ibrahim pasha someday."
"Why the fuck would I go to a brothel-" He broke into laughter at your reaction.
"I'm just joking! But do visit me, hm?" He took your hand and pressed a kiss to it. He helped you up on the horse before mounting his with a girl behind him, the others mounting the other horses.
"Thank you, Baris. For everything." Baris gave you a nod. You suddenly heard yells from behind you.
"Time to go!" Baris yelled.
-
You were galloping through the woods, the same forrest where you had first landed here. It was raining dogs and cats, making it hard for you to see ahead of you and even harder for the horse to run through the wet ground.
Your mind wandered back to Ibrahim. All this time, you thought he'd abandoned you and yet he was the one who had your back.
Was he really going to marry you?
You doubt he would've. Or even if he did, the question was- would you have said yes?
Maybe. He is the sane one of the ottomans, and apparently the only one who is willing to help you. You're sure he wouldnt have done anything unbecoming of a man even if you married him. And why would you not marry him? It buys you time to work on your machine and get out of this era, AND it protects you from the royals, especially Mehmed.
Mehmed. Your heart wrenched at the thought of him punishing those poor servants. Did he really have their eyes stitched up? What would he have done to you on returning? More importantly, what would he have done if he caught you escaping.
"I'll break your fucking legs!"
You shuddered at his threat, leaning down to speed through the woods.
Maybe God finally cut you a break- how else could you explain all this? Baris being the one to break you out, despite you being sure he'd betray you the first chance he gets. Ibrahim pasha having your back all this time. You escaping the palace without the Janissaries or anyone hot on your tail. Maybe your time machine will finally work too. Maybe you'll finally make it out of here. Maybe you just lucked out-
You heard the clouds above you roar loudly and in the next moment, you heard yourself scream as you were blinded by a white flash, throwing you off your horse.
You laid on the ground, pain radiating throughout your body, vision blurry, palpitations in your ear as you tried to make sense of what had happened.
A lightening strike.
You were struck by lightening.
If you werent in so much pain, rapidly losing consciousness, you wouldve laughed at your fortune.
Lucked out?
More like out of luck.
-
Mustafa had walked in on Mehmed screaming and threatening to kill every servant, his sword bloody. Looking behind his younger brother, he spotted two headless guards.
"Mehmed?" He asked cautiously.
"She escaped! She fucking ran!" Mehmed yelled before he could ask what was wrong. He raised his sword to cut off yet another head, but Mustafa stopped him.
"Tell me what happened." Mustafa's strong voice had Mehmed reeling some of his anger back, explaining what had happened.
After listening to him, Mustafa sighed. "We'll find her, Mehmed. Calm down." He looked at his Janissaries and ordered them to close off the city, and the docks. No one leaves.
"She could've already left the city-"
"Its unlikely for her to have managed to do that, that too when its pouring heavily." Mustafa, the cool headed prince, began to think logically.
"Then where is she? The city is still too big! It'd be like finding needle in a haystack." Mehmed sneered, glaring at the servants.
Mustafa closed his eyes, trying to think of where you could possibly ran off to.
He snapped his eyes open. Of course, you'd be there.
"I know where she is." He stood up, Mehmed following behind him.
-
You woke up to someone wiping your cheek. It took a few moments for your vision to clear, your eyes looking around what seemed to be a cottage before landing on the person beside you.
Old lady.
It was the old lady. The one who saved you when you dropped at her doorstep when you entered this era.
"Oh dear, you're finally awake!" She smiled gently, continuing to wipe the mud off your cheek. "You're lucky my husband was out when he spotted you unconscious. You could've drowned in that rain, you know?" She said in a chiding town, as if you chose to lie down in the pouring rain.
The old man walked out of the kitchen with a cup of hot tea in his hands.
"Here you go, hun. Drink this." He handed you the cup before sitting beside his wife.
"Now, where've you been all this time?"
By the time you were finished telling them everything that happened to you, from being kidnapped by the Janissaries to be sold as a slave, to almost dying a few times in the palace, to being set up to marry one of the two princes, to being struck with lightening, the old lady was in tears as she pulled you into her embrace while the old man continued to yell a stream of curses at the Ottomans.
When you tried to leave, they stopped you- telling you its absolutely unsafe for you to go anywhere in this bad weather. And well, hearing the heavy rain and the fact that you were indeed struck by lightening, you couldnt really argue.
"Okay, just for tonight."
While you were having dinner, you were taken back to your memories- memories of your own family. Sure, you were surrounded by family at the palace as well, but they didnt feel like home. They didnt really care for you, not like this cute old couple does. And to be honest, you missed this feeling. From your time in Jerusalem, to your time in the palace, this is the first moment of normalcy you've had in a while.
You looked at them, smiling as they made silly jokes and ate food. They included you in their conversations, they fed you, they made sure you were comfortable when you slept in the guest room- or what you assumed was their daughter's room.
You didnt tell them, you couldnt but you did try finding out what happened to her. Baris told you what did.
Naima. That was their daughter's name.
Naima was brought to the palace by the Janissaries as a concubine, and only a few weeks in- she was chosen to sleep with the sultan.
She killed herself the next day. She had jumped off the roof, but she didnt die instantly. She died as Hurrem watched from her balcony, and she refused to alert anyone to help the poor woman.
You didnt want to take this last bit of hope from the couple- the hope that Naima may still be alive and will come home one day.
-
You were woken up to someone banging on the door.
"BY THE ORDER OF SEHZADE MUSTAFA! OPEN THE DOOR!" Someone yelled from outside. The old man sprung to his feet as he peered through the window.
Janissaries. A whole troop of them and in the very front, sitting on top of their horses were Mustafa and Mehmed.
"Get her out of here." The old man told his wife, who hurried you out of bed and was about to leave through the back door when she saw the Janissaries out there as well.
"Come on." She dragged you up the stairs to the roof, just as you heard the door being broken down and yelling.
Reaching the roof, you looked down only to see the cottage was surrounded by the guards.
"We're surrounded." You whispered. "There is no escape."
"There is." The old lady whispered back to you, ushering you towards the edge of the roof. "Jump."
You looked at her. "What?"
"I wont let them take you back there. Jump, Y/n." She pushed you towards the edge.
"No- I'm not jumping!" You tried to back away but she gripped your arm.
"You have to, Y/n! I wont let them- I wont let any man take advantage of you! I wont let them do to you what they did to my Naima!" She cried, pushing you towards the ledge again, but you resisted against her, causing you to fall onto the ground.
"I'm doing this to save you!" She cried again, straddling you as she wrapped her hands around your throat. "Why wont you understand-"
"STOP!" A voice yelled. You both looked to the side to find Mustafa and Mehmed, the latter holding the old man.
Mustafa raised a hand in surrender. "Let her go. And we wont hurt your husband."
The old lady looked conflicted, as she looked at Mustafa and then at Mehmed who held a sword at the old man's neck, ready to slice it.
"I- I-" She continued to hold your throat as you struggled to breathe.
For a brief moment, the couple made eye contact and the old man smiled at her reassuringly.
"Do it. Save Y/n." He told her, but before anyone could react, Mehmed sliced off the man's head, Mustafa looking at his younger brother in shock as the woman shrieked before she began choking you hard.
With lightening speed, Mustafa pulled her off you and pushed her to the side.
"Y/n? Are you okay?" He crouched beside you, checking on you as you took huge gulps of air before nodding. Mustafa sighed in relief as he helped you stand up, only to turn around to find Mehmed holding the woman over the edge.
"Mehmed, dont!" He yelled, but it was too late. Mehmed kicked her in the back and the old lady fell to the ground. Mustafa left your side to look over the edge, eyes wide as he saw the woman hadnt died. Blood sputtered out of her mouth as she stared up with eyes blown wide.
And then, a sword fell on her neck straight down, finally killing her.
He looked to his side only to find Mehmed looking down disinterested, as if he hadnt just brutally murdered an old woman.
His younger brother.
A monster.
He watched Mehmed whisper threats to you as he dragged you back outside, practically throwing you over his horse. Mustafa let him take you- he wasnt going to fight who gets to ride with you when they were all going home.
Except... not.
Mustafa's brows furrowed in confusion as he watched Mehmed and his Janissaries take a turn and go a completely different path then the one to the Topkapi palace.
Where was he taking you?
Mustafa sped after Mehmed, his troops following behind as he yelled at Mehmed to stop.
But he didnt, not until an abandoned palace came to view.
Mehmed got off his horse, pulling you down before nodding at his men to take you inside.
"What the hell are you doing?" Mustafa asked as he got off his own horse, marching towards you but Mehmed blocked his path.
"What I should've done in the first place- duel."
Mustafa looked at him in disbelief. Duel? "You want to fight me? Have you truly lost it?!"
Mehmed got up in his face. "I've seen the way you look at her. I am not going to stand for it any longer."
"Mehmed-"
"Only one of us can have her, Mustafa. This ends today." Mehmed pushed him as he drew his sword.
Mustafa lips settled into a thin line.
"Fine." He pulled out his sword. "May the better prince win."
-
"Let go of me!" You try pulling yourself free from the guards grasps, but they continue to haul you inside the abandoned castle.
"I said- let go-!"
"Oh good, you're finally here!"
Mihirmah stood in front of you with a grin.
"Mihirmah? What are you doing here?"
She raised a brow. "What am I doing here? I'm here to prepare you!"
"Prepare me?"
"Mmhm! For your wedding to Mehmed!"
"What?"
She shrugged, taking you by the arm as she pulled you inside a room. "Well, when I found out you had run away, I suggested to Mehmed that the only way to make sure you stay by his side is for him to marry you. And I knew my mom would've stopped him from doing that, so I suggested he bring you here! By the time dad returns, you'd already be married to Mehmed and dad will definitely choose him to be the next sultan! Its only a cherry on top that Mustafa came here as well, and when Mehmed kills him- dad will have no choice but to choose Mehmed as his heir!"
You watched in disbelief before trying to make a run for it, but she anticipated it, snapping her fingers for the guards to lock the doors.
"Now, I will send the maids inside to get you ready. I need to go check on the sheikh who has to marry you two off." She smiled before leaving you alone.
She could care less about the sheikh, right now- she wanted a seat upfront to the showdown! Mehmed was going to win and she needed to be there to witness it.
-
Mustafa dodged Mehmed's attack again. Despite agreeing to the duel earlier, Mustafa had been taking on the defensive. Mehmed was his younger brother, he was still family even if he incredibly insane.
He cant bring himself to hurt him-
"Why arent you fighting?" Mehmed growled as he swiped at him again. "Are you that afraid of dying? Fight me like a man!"
"I dont want to fight you at all." Mustafa jumped back as he striked again. "You're my brother-"
"Like hell we are! One way or another, I'm killing you Mustafa! Be it today, or tomorrow when I'm finally sultan, because you know your mother screwed up any chance you had to be chosen! She fucked up and now you will pay for it!" Mehmed yelled, finally hitting a nerve with Mustafa.
My mother. They dont respect her.
Mustafa raised his sword as he struck over and over again, Mehmed barely able to escape the blade as it sliced his skin many times.
My own brother wants to kill me. And if I die, then so will my mother,
Mehmed groaned as Mustafa suddenly sliced the skin on his arm, the younger prince rolling onto the ground to avoid getting his arm cut off clean. But Mustafa was faster, kicking him in the stomach as Mehmed dropped onto the ground in pain.
"I am the better son." Mustafa said with a kick to his stomach.
"I am the better ruler." Another kick.
"I am the better choice." Another kick.
"I am better than you. In every way." Mustafa raised his sword to drop it on Mehmed's neck, just as cruelly he had done to that old woman.
Mehmed raised his hand in surrender as he coughed up blood.
"Please, Mustafa- d-dont. I'm your brother!" Mehmed begged for his life.
And in that moment, Mustafa saw his younger brother, the small child he promised to always protect.
Mustafa closed his eyes, taking a deep breath before stepping away.
"I. Win." He stated, turning around to leave. He was the bigger man. Once again, his mercy overtook his- no his love for his brother overtook his logic. He knows Mehmed wont back down, he will fight with him again. But that will be for another day-
"M-Mustafa." He looked back at him, his heart dropping at the sight.
Mehmed was coughing up blood, his face looked pale- and then he puked.
Something was wrong. Very wrong.
And the moment his mouth started foaming, Mustafa remembered his mother's words.
"Dont worry about Mehmed, hm? He wont be a hurdle."
Mahidevran may have been exiled, but she still had a few people loyal to her. People who wanted Mustafa as the next sultan, not any of Hurrem's sons. People who more than willingly began microdosing Mehmed with poison.
-
You were trying to break a window to escape when the doors swung open. Mihirmah had returned, tears running down her cheeks.
"Mihirmah-" She hugged you before you could beg her to let you go.
"You look beautiful." She whispered as she pulled back, admiring the maid's work. "Mehmed always did adore the color red on you." She said in a trance.
"Mihirmah, please let me go." You plead and she gives you a broken smile.
"Thats what I came here to do." She whisperd, cupping your cheek. "I'm letting you go, Y/n. Mehmed's dead."
Oh. Thats why she's crying. But with Mehmed dead, you get to leave.
"I'm sorry to hear that." You said, watching her stumble back towards the door.
"I'm going to miss you, Y/n." She nodded, grabbing the fire torch off the wall. "Tell Mehmed I love him."
What?
Mihirmah dropped the torch onto the ground, setting the wooden floor ablaze instantly.
"Mihirmah-!" She left the room, closing the doors before you could make your escape.
"Mihirmah! Open the door!" You slammed your fists as the room began catching on fire.
Mihirmah locked the door from outside, wiping her tears away as she walked away.
You are Mehmed's bride. You belong to him, in life and now... in death.
Goodbye Mehmed. She closed her eyes. You wont be alone now.
She watched from the balcony as the Janissaries- her and Mehmed's troops, cornered Mustafa and pushed him to the ground like an animal for slaughter.
The guard looked at her.
She gave a nod.
The next moment, Mustafa's head was chopped off.
-
Fucking Mihirmah!
You slammed your fists against the door one last time before falling down to the ground, fire spreading around the room.
Fire. Why the fuck does it always have to be fire? Why is everyone so hell bent upon burning you to crisp? First in the desert with Salauddin, then those concubines in the harem, now this. If you didnt have a phobia before, you sure do have one now!
You pulled out your time machine hopelessly. Piece of crap wont even turn on-
Its on.
Your eyes widened at the screen illuminating.
Its working.
But how-
The lightning strike! It mustve charged it! That or maybe it could sense every single time you're near death and decides to fucking work.
"Oh fuck!" You curse as flames begin to close in on you. Now is not the time.
With trembling hands you try to change the date and location, but the screen is still broken and it wont budge.
You groan in frustration as you slam the button, your surrounding blurring as you begin to travel. Whatever time you land in, it'll be better than the one where you almost burn to death.
Right?
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So, thoughts?? How did you like this chapter? What will happen next?
I also sorta blacked out a few times while editing this chapter, so ignore any mistakes.
PART 11 is here!
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demonlorddiva · 2 months ago
Text
Obey Me! Brothers When Your On Your Period
Gonna keep the gn for the most part so anyone who gets this can feel included!! We’re all suffering together and I just want comfort 😭✌️p.s this is very me coded and I’m very much a crybaby and overreact to everything when I’m on my period so bare with me. My asks are open so if you want me to delve deeper on certain characters let me know!
Lucifer
Is informed of the menstrual cycle reading up on humans before you came to the devildom… well at least some of them
Makes sure you have the proper supplies you need already stocked in your room
Does NOT understand the emotional part
When Lucifers giving you one of his famous lectures, the pain begins and your just trying to stare at the floor
Lucifer: “are you even listening to me?”
You: “yes”
Lucifer: “I expect more from you as our human exchange student you know?”
At that moment you just put your face in your hands and start sobbing, too overwhelmed with the emotions and the pain
He’s taken aback for sure. He’s always expecting you to get mad at him, talk back, get angry, something other than this
He’s immediately by your side apologizing and making sure your okay
When you explain to him the situation he understands and lets you lay down with no other words
In the future when your on your cycle, he’s very gentle with you
The second he finds out your hurting, he immediately try’s to help in any way he can
Weather it’s getting you painkillers, a heating pad, anything you need
If you need a quiet place to be while your meds kick in he will let you lay down on the couch in his office while he rubs your back
Mammon
Has NO IDEA what a period is
But being your first man he notices the changes in you during that time
In a moment of pain you tell him what’s going on and have to explain to him about it
“Yer bleeding.. and ya do that ONCE A MONTH??? WHY???”
After a while he’s in tune of when it happens (mostly) and what you need
Always keeps pads/tampons on him in case you ask
If your cramping, all bets are off. No one is aloud to bother you or ask you for anything. Your going straight to his room or yours so he can take care of you.
“Leave MC alone! Cant ya see they’re in pain?!?”
If your craving snacks he will raid beels snack stash to get you what you need
Doesn’t mean it but when your upset and not on your period asks “what ya pmsing??”
he just wants to know
He can’t handle it if your emotional tho it gets him worked up too (even tho he tries to hide it)
“Don’t cry ya baby, you’re fine. The great mammons here ya know? It’s okay”
Leviathan
Figured it out through anime (what else is new)
If you tell him he might get a little wiggy and not know what to do
He’s trying his best let him live
Tell him what you need and he will do it for you literally anything
If your in pain he thinks your dying and panics a bit tell him you’ll be okay and you just need comfort
If you come to him teary eyed asking him to hang out he will put on a slice of life anime or something fun and cuddle with you in his bathtub bed
All the plushies and pillows are there so your warm and cozy
Keeps medication in his room on the off chance you need it
Satan
Oh this boy KNOWS about the pms
Read up on every book imaginable
If you get angry or frustrated during this time he completely understands
Your in pain! Who wouldn’t be upset
Definitely wants to fix the situation immediately but that can get overwhelming at times
“What do you need? Medicine? Heating pad? Water? You know you should stay hydrated.”
He’s just trying to help!
But sometimes you just need comfort
When you come to him, you just have to explain that you just need someone to be with you and to relax and it clicks
He will bring you to his room while he lays down and reads with you
If the pain gets to bad he will rub your head or back until you relax more
DEF yells at his brothers if they even think of bothering you
Asmo
I have a HC that asmo knows when your on your cycle before even you do so imma run with that
You don’t understand why he’s being so overly nice to you all of the sudden
He drags you into your room and you don’t get anything until the pain starts
“I just thought you could could use some extra asmo loving right now!”
It seems like he can read your mind on how your feeling
If your aggravated or frustrated he will let you rant and rave
If your sad and crying he will hold you while you let it all out
If your feeling self conscious he will tell you your gorgeous and amazing while he massages your scalp
Self care is in order, even if it’s just a warm bath he prepares for you with all the salts and oils to make you feel so relaxed, you can’t help but feel so cared for
Beel
We love this man but he doesn’t know anything about humans 😭 but he’s so willing to learn if it’s for you
Your pmsing all day at RAD and your very excited to have your snack that you have in the kitchen
After school, you immediately walk into the kitchen to find beel.
You open the cabinet for your snack, finding it gone
“Oh that? Sorry I was hungry”
You immediately start sobbing
He legit doesn’t know what to do
He normally promises to buy you snacks later and you are okay with it
He’s so guilty and so sorry
When you come to your senses and calm down you explain to him what’s going on
Your in pain?? Where does it hurt? How can he help??
Once he gets a grasp on it, every month he’s got you set
All your favorite snacks and sweets are bought for you to enjoy
If you don’t come down for dinner cause your ‘not hungry’ he’s worried
Will figure out your favorite meals you like for this time and make them for you
If you need a cuddle while your in pain he’s so warm and so cozy
Belphegor
He knows about humans and knows about periods but doesn’t know everything
And he’s a little late to the game with you
The other boys have gotten used to how you are during this time of the month and he’s new to it
You two are walking home and he’s upset with you
What could you do? You NEEDED him for a project you were working on for class so you woke him up from his hiding spot to pitch in
And he was upset and ranting
Not knowing the pain and emotional state you were in
You try to hold your tongue for as long as you can as you walk in front of him
Bel: “this is so so stupid, why do I have to do this project anyways?”
You: “I have to do this project too you know? Stop complaining so we can get this over with” you say with an irritated tone, just trying to get home.
Bel: “what, you on your period or something human? Lighten up”
Maybe it was the cramps irritated your body, making your back ache and your head hurt. Or maybe it was the hormones making your emotions run rampant. But you stop in your tracks, making Belphegor stop too
He can’t see your face, but he hears you let a sob out, wiping your eyes before you made a sprint to the house of lamentation 
Belphie doesn’t normally run, but he runs after you, missing you before you run to your room and shut the door behind you
Mammon sees the commotion, and stops him before he can reach your room to ask what happened
When Belphegor tells him, he’s pissed and lets him have it and explains the situation
When he realizes he’s so upset with himself
He shouldn’t have let his frustrations out on you during such a hard time
After a bit in your room, you hear a soft knock at your door
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were hurting”
You spent the rest of the evening cuddling
Finishes his and your part of the project to get some stress off of you
If he felt you twinge with the slightest bit of pain he would hold you that much tighter
After that, if he found out how you were feeling it was immediate nap time, he hates to see you hurting
Will massage your back to get you to fall asleep
Gets a bit too worried when your pain gets too bad and will ask Satan for help if needed
Welp here ya go! Belphegor isn’t even my favorite character and I got SO deep with him so you belphie Stans EAT UP
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