#if someone disagrees then AT LEAST IT APPLIES FOR ME

[blessedmisery]

summary: sung jinwoo x reader - boyfriend headcannons. sfw and nsfw included. warnings: fluff, smut, idk this is silly authors note: ty for reading, hope u enjoy. likes and reblogs always appreciated <3

sung jinwoo is super introverted and literally so oblivious to anyone liking him so it'll take a while before the two of you get together

but when you do it'll be sooooo good. so so good.

jinwoo is terrible at communicating his feelings, and he will struggle to show you that he loves you at first

so you will be the one saying "i love you" first

his love languages would be acts of service, physical touch and quality time because this man seriously needs a hug but also loves doing things for you

he likes his space and alone time, but he would love to be in the same room together while the two of you do your own thing.

he'd be surprisingly really good at cooking because he's super detail-oriented and attentive

that also applies to your feelings, if you're feeling a certain way, he'll catch on instantly

but he won't really know what to do, he's pretty cold sometimes so he's not great at comforting people.

terrible texter. he texts like my dad. "ok", "👍" he's just super dry and doesn't feel the need to say more than he has to over text.

very blunt and honest, if you need advice he'll never sugarcoat. he'll tell you how things are straight up, even it it's the last thing you want to hear. he's a very no bullshit kind of guy.

arguments with jinwoo would actually be the worst. he hates being wrong and will argue until you give in and agree that he's right. he'll also fuck you while arguing to really drive the point home.

possessive. so possessive. will never let anything bad happen to you, and likes knowing that you are only his.

on that note, he also gets really jealous. but he won't make it obvious in public. however you will pay for making him feel that way later when you get home.

i imagine he looooves having his hair played with.

and just loves feeling taken care of in general. he's always taking care of everyone else that the feeling of having someone take care of him is so new but so intoxicating to him.

hates pda. he thinks that shit has a time and place (and i mean he ain't wrong) the most he will do is wrap an arm around your waist in a crowded area

but in the car? hand GLUED to your thigh. at home? always touching you or coming by to give you a kiss.

speaking of cars, he'd be a really good driver. but why have a car when you have kaisel.

BUT when jinwoo is being a normal member of society (aka not getting around on a literal shadow wyvern) hear me out, he would totally ride a motorcycle.

omg can you imagine riding on the back of it with him, the wind blowing against you while you tightly wrap your arms around his waist to hold on. fuck.

really hates valentine's day (he thinks it's stupid and a waste of time)

but that doesn't mean he still won't go all out for you and buy you flowers, chocolate, a huge teddy bear and fucking pink and red heart shaped balloons (he's so extra)

also hates his birthday, to him it's just any other day. that's when you have to come together with beru and igris and plan something out to make this man feel special.

fav season would definitely be fall or winter. he seems like someone who would despise the heat.

really annoying when he's sick. he'll pretend like he's fine and then he will act like he's dying. (he secretly just wants someone other than beru to take care of him)

forehead kisses. he loves to kiss you on your forehead, it's one of his favourite ways to show intimacy.

also gives really good hugs. he just has a really comforting aura (at least to you. others would likely disagree.)

really likes seeing you wear his clothes, particularly his hoodies. or when you sleep in his t-shirts. drives him absolutely mad.

has really good hygiene. i imagine he always smells really good.

with that, he's also a clean freak, and really hates making a mess and will get mad at you if you leave your clothes on the floor.

not a huge fan of pet names but will mostly stick to calling you "baby", "my love" when he's fucking you in missionary late at night, or "kitten" when he's feeling playful.

he's a cat person. i don't make the rules.

huge fan of the rain. he loves rainy days because they're an excuse to relax and lay in bed all day with you. and fuck.

hear me out, he would definitely be a reader. i can picture him enjoying a nice rainy afternoon with a good book. (anything to not socialize with other humans)

NOT a morning person. he likes to sleep in if he has nothing to do that day.

on that note he's a very light sleeper and has trouble falling asleep. so when he does u better not wake him tf up.

super competitive. if you're playing any games or making any bets with this man, best of luck to you. he will do anything to win.

lowkey a gamer. he's got a nice, expensive setup and he likes playing video games. especially when you're sitting on his lap while he plays.

hates being in pictures. good luck getting this man to smile in a photo.

stares at you a lot? (kinda creepy ngl) but he just really likes looking at you

now lets discuss the sex:

realistically he wouldn't be very experienced because this guy spent all his time in gates instead of talking to women.

but ofc its sung jinwoo so he'll be instantly good at anything he does

very respectful towards you overall

i imagine he's actually pretty vanilla, at least at first because he hasn't had many opportunities to explore kinks

unless he's mad. then ur getting it babe. and ur getting it good.

he will push your head into the sheets and take his anger out on you, pounding into you mercilessly while whispering dirty, degrading things into your ear.

"act like a bitch, get fucked like one" attitude when he's mad.

he's not very vocal himself but looooves to hear you make noise

lowkey size kink cuz hes tall af (6'3 i think?)

despite being kind of vanilla and abit of a clean freak this man gets filthy with you when then two of you fuck.

really likes cum play. and oral sex. he will spend hours eating you out like there's no tomorrow. he also loves getting head.

like i said he's not very vocal but if you give this man a blow job. whew. he will make the hottest sounds you'd ever hear coming out of a mans mouth. can you imagine him breathing heavily, his voice all raspy saying "fuck baby keep going, just like that" while he grabs your hair, choking you on his cock. bye.

and licking. holy shit. once he starts he wont stop. he will lick you from ass to clit. no questions asked.

really likes edging you— "what was that baby? i couldn't hear you" he'd mumble against the sensitive skin surrounding your clit after eating you out for a whole hour, pushing you so close to the edge but denying you your sweet release. by this point you're panting, tears are prickling the corners of your eyes and you've become completely incoherent. "p-please jinwoo. p-please ah, i need to c-cum" you'd utter, taking all of your energy to form that one simple sentence while tugging on his messy hair. "mmm kitten i know. but i'm not done. you just taste soo good" he'd mutter drunkenly in response and continue licking and sucking you until you've quite literally lost your damn mind.

hes so pussy drunk omfg

dacryphilia. really likes seeing you cry from his edging or overstim during sex

"you're mine. only mine". constantly whispering this in your ear while you fuck. (like i said, the man is possessive)

has the prettiest cock (just like him). not wide but he makes up for that shit in LENGTH. def above average length. good luck fitting that shit all the way in (if u say u can't he'll make u)

one word: fingering. yeah. those long, slender fingers will be exploring every inch of your clit and pussy. and you'll be loving every second of it.

loves to cum together. he's a big fan of creampies.

big handcuff enthusiast. likes to see you struggle.

his favourite position would be missionary. like i said, he loves looking at you and hearing the noises you make. missionary is ideal for him.

very big fan of shower sex. something about getting home after a long day and having a good fuck in the shower is so appealing to him.

"good girl" yeah mhm. he'd say this. a lot.

praises. these will be rare with jinwoo and you'll really have to earn it but he will praise you so good when you do.

ass > boobs. like i said, i don't make the rules babe.

© @blessedmisery 2025.

[bwat5-blog]

A Look At The "Nothing Character" Who Broke Our Hearts: Isha

**Spoilers For Arcane**

I must say, there was a time not so long ago that if someone were to tell me there was a whole tag devoted to the hatred of a cute, tenacious, brave little girl character who died tragically trying to emulate her hero, I would have found the idea completely insane. However, since becoming a part of our little community....

Before we get into this a bit let me say, I am not formally educated in writing/literature/creative story telling or any of that. So what I discuss and list will as usual be the research I could find on my own with sources provided. I know for a fact through some of my interactions on here there are some very educated people in this area, so if any of you see this and care enough, please chime in! I'd love to learn more.

What Is The Complaint?:

"Isha isn't a real character!"

"Isha did nothing except get blown up!"

"Why was this kid even in the show?"

"Isha's only purpose was to give Jinx a reason to be happy then take it away!"

You get the idea. Overall people seem to hate the character because they feel she really wasn't one. They see her as being more of a singular plot device with no real information or depth given and not having any real purpose. While it is true we don't learn a ton about her, I completely disagree as to the worth and impact of her character on the story. In doing some digging, I came across the following term:

Catalyst Character-

Per Reference.com: "A catalyst character, also known as a catalytic character, is the character in a story who causes the protagonist, or main character, to move toward some kind of action or transformation. This character is usually the person that spends the most quality and influential time with the protagonist."

Okay, rather or not you agree or think it matters I'd hope at the least that that explanation is fairly clear. So moving forward, why do I think this applied to Isha? Because she is in all aspects a MASSIVE agent of change in the narrative. I understand not liking her. That is totally individual. But to imply she didn't matter is complete and utter nonsense.

The Ventilation Chamber Battle:

The brawl between Vi and Jinx has come to a head. Vi sits atop Jinx with one gauntlet around Jinx's throat and the other poised to kill her. Jinx is telling her to do it... she's glad that Vi is the one who is going to end her. When out of nowhere Isha leaps between them pointing a gun at Vi. '

Concrete Impact:

Stops the fight cold

Jinx immediately screams no betraying her actual fear for Vi's safety

Snaps Vi out of the fight where it appears she was quite possibly pulling back her hand to finish the fight

Isha's presence is what makes Vi get in front of Caitlyn's rifle leading to their separation and what occurs for them afterward.

Jinx clearly is "seeing" Vi again for the first time when Vi leaps to stop Caitlyn

2. Life With Jinx:

We return to Jinx after the time skip. It turns she has been living quietly in hiding with Isha since the battle. She is staying out of the bloodshed, focusing on her relationship caring for the young girl. She seems more at peace than we have seen her the entire series, even declaring "Jinx is dead" when Sevika comes to demand she get involved.

Concrete Impact:

It's strange to say for something I list under concrete but just the obvious and clear effect she has on Jinx herself. We see it expressed in many ways, such as Jinx saying Isha reminds her of Powder, Jinx saying she doesn't want to screw up what she has with Isha when in Silco's office, and so on. I feel like we could do an entire analysis post on Isha's effect on Jinx mental/emotional state but that is for another time.

The fact that Isha is masquerading as Jinx during the occupation is HUGE. We have to remember, Jinx is not actually getting involved at all before the events of the rally. The people of Zaun have made her their symbol because of what she did, and because Piltover has made Jinx their symbol of why they are doing what they are doing.

It is only because Isha went to the rally and got arrested that Jinx rejoins the fight.

3. Jinx Comes To Stillwater:

Isha has been arrested along with a large group of Zaunites during the rally. Sevika limps back to the hideout and tells Jinx who is immediately extremely upset. We see her seriously glitching in full for the first time since the time skip. She and Sevika mount a rescue mission, and because of Isha. Jinx rejoins the game since the occupation began.

Concrete Impact:

Without Isha being taken Jinx doesn't get involved which quite literally changes the trajectory of the entire story. Meeting Vander again and everything that stems from that would be impacted which quite literally could effect every character in the story. It is too much to list or "what if".

4. Reuniting The Family:

In the wake of meeting Vander and rescuing Isha, Jinx goes and finds Vi in the fighting pits, telling her what she has found and together with Isha they set off on a journey to find him. Leading to the all-too-short reunification of their family, with their newest member of course.

Concrete Impact:

Of course to state the obvious, they wouldn't be here if it were not for any of the things we have already been over.

When Jinx and Vi start to fighting, once again it is Isha's involvement that stops it cold.

Seeing Jinx's care for Isha is what helps Vi start to see her sister in a new light.

It is Isha's bleeding from getting whacked that draws Vander to them. Vi immediately leaps to save her life and Jinx can see the Vi she knows is still there as well. Also being thrown into Vander's path like that leads to his regaining control and the scene we see above.

5. The Commune:

After their family is reunited Vi, Jinx and Isha take Vander to the commune to meet with Viktor. Hoping his healing gifts can save their father. Of course, it all ends in soul rending tragedy with Vander losing control and Isha sacrificing herself to save her new family during a Noxian attack.

Concrete Impact:

Isha brings Jinx's gun. Without the gun the plan to save Vander could have gone a hundred different ways.

Isha pocketed those stones. If she hadn't done so once again it is impossible to list all the ways that incident could have changed in the end.

The impact on the story from Isha's sacrifice is so far beyond "making Jinx sad" it is mind-boggling. It stops the attack in its tracks. Without Vi getting injured saving Jinx from the explosion, Caitlyn and Jinx may have never found even that microscopic bit of common ground between them we see. There is so much more and that is to say nothing of the impact on Jinx mentally/emotionally

Conclusion:

So again this is not a true deep dive or anything. And I do understand the complaint that we really don't ever learn a ton about her. But I absolutely do not understand or agree with the complaint that she is meaningless/unimportant/inconsequential to the story. Her actions and presence drive a massive amount of change in the course of season two, and without her it very likely could have all ended quite differently. To close, below is an English translation of Isha's farewell posted to reddit for you to enjoy. (I have no way of knowing if it is accurate so if not forgive me).

Child, don’t fear the thorns; walk barefoot, And you’ll find something precious. Look at this darkened sky; see how beautiful the fireworks are. There’s no need for so much sorrow. People flourish and wither, But even stubborn rocks and debris will bloom.

Part the mountains, Let her see me. Tell the stars, Hurry and shine on me. Blow away the dark clouds, With a stroke of blue. Even if the world is full of desolation, We can look up and see the moon.

While we still have the hearts of children, Even as lone blossoms among millions, we must bloom. Don’t be troubled or sad. Don’t forget: Even if tears fall, we must keep running, Run to where even time can’t find us. Be the birds that soar at the edge of the sky.

Part the mountains, Let her see me. Tell the stars, Hurry and shine on me. Blow away the dark clouds, With a stroke of blue. Even if the world is full of desolation, We can look up and see the moon.

While we still have the hearts of children, Even as lone blossoms among millions, we must bloom. Don’t be troubled or sad. Don’t forget: Even if tears fall, we must keep running, Run to where even time can’t find us. Be the birds that soar at the edge of the sky.

Don’t keep searching; Just give me a hug. Let’s quietly forget, For this is good enough for me.

[theangryman]

I’m having a conversation with you right now. I just disagree with you. I’m happy to have a conversation with about anyone. I try not to be too much of a jerk unless stuff like the “TIF” language comes out.

There are a spectrum of experiences, and your falls in one place, while mine falls in another. I didn’t read *Pageboy* so maybe his experience falls somewhere else.

I think a larger idea here is about the idea of classifications in science. You say that we can’t change “sex.”

Let’s switch discussions to something less emotionally weighted. The reclassification of Pluto from a “planet” to a “dwarf planet.” Did anything about Pluto change? What bearing does the classification have to the shape of Pluto’s heart? As *New Horizons* passed, did it need to change its trajectory to match that of a “dwarf planet”? Does the nitrogen ice flow any differently, did the snub shift the orbit of Charon?

Would there be any meaningful distinction between “planet” and “dwarf planet” if Colonol MacArthur forced nuclear war in Korea and an eternal winter took us all?

Scientific classifications are tools that we use to *describe* reality. They are not tools which govern reality. (Like look at how controversial clade/linnean shit can get. In a sense, we are all fishes.) They are *models*.

Think about the way we model atoms in chemistry class or Jimmy Neutron (I don’t mean to insult but just talk for a general audience.) The electrons spin go around the atom - it looks like little planets almost.

Electrons don’t do that. They exist as a probabilistic wave function that will collapse when observed. Conceivably, an electron associated with your body could be chilling on Pluto right now. The common misconception that this leads to is that electrons *orbit* the nucleus.

It’s entirely wrong.

Should we storm into science classroom and demand that teachers stop teaching the “wrong” model, that it has no meaningful reality?

No. That would be stupid. It’s a really useful model. It’s really useful for understanding energy levels, and how valence shells fill up, and it’s just a good visual when learning that lithium will lose one to make a plus one, etc etc.

What purpose are we using “male” “female” to categorize? Is this supposed to be some sort of “deeper” truth - which almost seems to be suggesting an idea of “sexed” souls? Do we need to know the chromosomal structure of everyone you meet to understand how to interact with them? How many elements of someone’s sex should be relevant to your interactions with them, other than for sexual or medical purposes?

What are we using “sex” to model, and what elements of that are unchangeable in each thing we are trying to model?

In some senses, the properties of my body *are* female - in that they are the properties associated with normative XX development (I imagine this is the easiest/least controversial way to simply categorize things). I am very likely XX. I have a vagina and uterus - which is very relevant to sexual partners and doctors, and is something I have no problem admitting.

What aspects do these elements have to my day to day interactions with the world? What other aspects do we need to use “female” with to model my life?

I think the socialization as a male adult as been pretty good at giving me the ability to mansplain lol.

I grow facial hair and am starting to experience male pattern baldness. Body fat falls on me in typical male patterns. I do not menstruate. I similar risks for hypertension to a cisgender man, my blood is thicker. Some reactions I have to illness and medication are more typical of men.

In social interactions with others, I am read as a man. Whatever models of male they have they are applying to me.

What are we wanting “male” and “female” to model, and which elements are immutable?

Because it's is clearly just a matter of dressing up and putting on a show, right? It's not about identity, lived experience, or personal truth it's about whether you can tick all the boxes of a stereotype.

[lvminisciel]

Just popping in here to say, I love reading your tags miè, so don’t be sorry at all. It’s always so much fun 🥰💞🌺 thank you for taking your time to write them 💞💚✨🫶

i think i should be the ones THANKING YOU for always sharing ur stunning & gorgeous writings all the timeeee 😭😭💗💗✨✨ ngl i always go back to ur writings from time to time, they jst hv this heartwarming feeling in them.. like yk the taste of homemade cake tht u can tell the person who bakes it clearly put their hearts to it!! those kinda things!! idk how to explain it in words (prob jst my english that is lacking) but yeah ur writing rlly gave off tht feel.. something u can always return to no matter how far ur journey is, a safe place u can go back to whenever u feel strayed. those kind of feelings.

[terrorbirb]

I'm bored at work so I'm seeing if I should report my old company for violating labor standards.

[reiding-writing]

Cold!reader accidentally letting a laugh slip after someone tells a joke (preferably Spencer) and the team is just a little shocked

CHECKMATE [ONESHOT]

/ˈtʃɛkˌmeɪt/

morgan and spencer just cannot agree on whether or not chess is actually a fun game to play, dragging you and emily into their debate in hopes of gaining a majority vote.

WARNINGS: fem!reader, playful arguing, chess slander

spencer reid x cold!reader || fluff || 1.1k || series masterlist!!

a/n: do people actually like chess? personally i think it’s really fun but my brother seems to disagree

main masterlist!!

“You play chess in your spare time Reid, at least my hobbies are interesting,” Morgan rolls his eyes with a laugh, leaning against the back of his chair with a confident smirk on his face.

“Chess is interesting,” Spencer furrows his eyebrows slightly at Morgan’s comment, frowning like it was a direct insult to him and not just the game.

It was nine o’clock in the morning, and Spencer and Morgan were having a debate about goddamn chess. What did you do to deserve such torture first thing on a Monday?

Letting Spencer sit opposite you probably, but sometimes he’d basically do your work for you so you suppose it still had its benefits sometimes.

Sometimes being the key word.

Today was not one of those times.

“Interesting to eighty-year-old scholars maybe,” Morgan scoffs at the mere idea that chess could be a fun and intellectual game at the same time.

You didn’t mind chess per se, you wouldn’t choose it as a way to satiate your boredom, but if someone - that someone being Spencer Reid because he was the only one in the office who actually played chess regularly - asked to play a match with you, you wouldn’t turn it down.

“Actually, the average age for competitive chess players is thirty one in the United States,”

Morgan presses his middle finger against his nose bridge like he’s pushing up an imaginary pair of glasses, pointing the index finger of his other hand upwards. “Actually-”

Spencer serves him with a hard push against his shoulder. “Shut up-”

The movement causes Emily to give a little snicker from her own desk, and Morgan takes it as a sign of his victory, clasping his hands together and bringing them to rest behind his head as he crosses his left ankle over his right knee.

“Alright, chess consensus, ‘fun’ or boring?” Morgan throws his arm out to you and Emily as a gesture for your responses.

“Not for me,” Emily’s answer, whilst definitely leaning in Morgan’s favour, is objective enough so that it doesn’t unintentionally insult Spencer’s entire lineage by suggesting that chess can’t be fun.

“Alright, Ice Queen, final vote’s up to you, you can make or break the final verdict here,” Morgan tilts his head dramatically in your direction with his hands outstretched.

You look up from your desk with an exasperated sigh, looking at him through your eyebrows in a clear indication that you don’t want to be involved in the conversation.

“Awe come on don’t look like that, this is very important stuff here,” Its like every word that leaves Morgan’s mouth is just to poke fun at Spencer’s love for playing chess, and as you glance in his direction you can see his eyes on you.

He wanted the answer too. Great.

With an exaggerated groan you lean back in your chair and shrug your shoulders. “It’s fun depending on who you play it with,”

“Oh come on, what kind of half-assed answer is that?” Morgan shakes his head, crossing his arms. “You gotta pick a side here,”

“I’m entirely right,” You mirror Morgan as you cross your arms over your chest. “If you have a shit opponent then obviously it’s going to be boring,” You enunciate your answer as if it applies directly to Morgan himself.

“I am not a ‘shit opponent’,” Morgan rolls his eyes in feigned indignation. “I just get bored half-way through,”

“Because you’re shit and don’t actually know how to play,”

“Not true-”

Spencer’s nodding calls Morgan’s defences insignificant.

“Hey-” Morgan pushes his hand against Spencer’s shoulder. “Don’t agree with her, I’m not bad at chess I just don’t like chess,”

“People who aren’t good at certain activities have a three times higher chance of disliking said activity,” Spencer doesn’t back down from his stance, shrugging lightly with a nonchalant expression.

“Okay, you’re teaming up on me now I’m calling favouritism,” Morgan waves his hands with a shake of his head. “Prentiss back me up here, she is so only siding with Reid because they’re secretly in love with each other,”

“Oh 100%,”

You scoff at Emily’s answer, rolling your eyes. “You’re just defensive because we’re right,”

“Chess is a very intellectual game, maybe you’re just not smart enough to understand it,” Spencer shrugs again as he shoots Morgan down, and a small snicker leaves your mouth at the combination of Spencer’s burn and the look on Morgan’s face as he computes it.

You cover up the tail end of it with a cough, hiding your mouth behind your hand, but it’s not enough to actually cover it up, and Morgan’s face moves from shock to horror as he blinks in your direction. “Am I tripping balls right now or did I just hear a laugh from the robot herself?”

“What? Am I not allowed to laugh now?” You scoff at Morgan’s apparent shock of you being able to experience positive emotions, immediately falling back into your naturally icy demeanour.

“There you are, you got possessed by a spirit of joy there for a second,”

“Shut your mouth,” You throw a crumpled up piece of paper across the desks to hit him square between his eyes and your three coworkers all burst out into laughing fits of their own.

Spencer’s laughter was much quieter than Morgan and Emily’s but it seemed to dominate your ear canals nonetheless, quashing your frustration for Morgan’s attitude under the waves of his voice and again leaving you, as Morgan had so nicely put it, ‘possessed by a spirit of joy’.

He was in a similar state, a small sense of pride flowing through his veins not only because you’d taken his side in his little debate, but also at the fact that he’d managed to make you laugh.

Him. Spencer Reid had actually managed to make the most emotionally guarded person in the whole office actually laugh.

Score one for Spencer.

[obsessedwrhys]

I was wondering if I could request a Leo or/and Donnie x reader. (I don’t know if you do multiple- if you don’t- super sorry! Just do whichever one you feel in the mood to do) where if someone runs a finger through their hair or scratches for scalp they just melt? Like full on limp- very easy to make reader stop overworking themselves, cuddle with them, just get them to sleep, ya know! Hope that makes sense lol!

DISASTER TWINS X TOUCHSTARVED!READER

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ fluff, no angst, reader is gn!! (I didn't know what to name this headcanon 🤷🏻‍♀️)

LEO

You just know being with this man means being constantly showered with affection.

That's why you two are easily the perfect pair.

Everytime you find yourself stressed from your work, he could feel his senses kicking in from a mile away. Before you know it, he's already by your side to provide emotional support.

"Alright alright!! Time to take a break!! Chop chop!!" He'd shoo you out of the chair and drag you to his bed.

He knows how hard your work is, at least he does from the things April has told him. That's why he goes over the top when helping you unwind.

Back massages, feet rubs, and your favourite, head massages. Dude would definitely purchase body oil for you. The way he so delicately runs his hands through your hair while also making sure he applies just enough force for it to be soothing. You couldn't help but hum happily.

Those noises being signs that he's doing things just right!!

Apart from that, if you were to finish your work, he would definitely reward you by buying all your favourite snacks while also cuddling together to watch a show you've been meaning to start.

But if you're too tired. He'd just play your comfort songs as you guys just cuddle to sleep.

He has a ton of playlists that contains your favourite songs.

You could ask him about that one song you don't remember the name to and he'll instantly know which one you were talking about.

He likes to brag about having such a hard working partner to his brothers.

Like pleaseeee you wish you could get lucky like me 🤭

Of course he's not fine with you overworking yourself. That's a huge no no for him.

If you were to object his idea of taking a break, this man will straight up kneel down and rest his head on your lap like a dog desperate for your attention. He wouldn't stop sighing or making sad noises until you've given in.

He knows you like physical touch so if you ever liked, he wouldn't mind keeping you company as you worked, which most of the time resulted in him falling asleep on the table.

He just wants to be apart of it okay!!! You like to tell him he's doing a good job even though he doesn't do much but play with the pencil by trying to balance it on his nose.

100% cutie patootie

DONNIE

Now this man don't play around.

If you tell him you need to get the work done on time then this man will help you make sure it's done on time.

He's extremely helpful, he watches as you work but he won't intervene unless you request for his assistance. That's because he wants you to grow and solve things by yourself.

However if he were to see you start to burn out from frustration, he'd suggest you guys to take a break which he likes to call "Coffee break"

Do not ever say no to coffee break because this man will talk you to tears by justifying about a topic you strongly disagree on.

He'd brew you both a cup of coffee, but if you happen not to be into caffeine then tea will do.

Since he's aware of how you seem to shut off your mind from physical touch, he would cuddle with you as he just scratches your scalp. The way your eyes flutter close makes him smile to himself.

As someone who also struggles with burn outs, he would hate for the same to happen to you. Yeah sure he doesn't take care of himself that well but that doesn't mean he'll let that happen to you!!!

If you are ever too exhausted, he'd offer to wash your hair for you. You know like those things they have at the saloon where you lay down and put your hair in the open sink thingy (im lazy to find the name)? Yeah he'd definitely make one in his lab just for your personal use.

He would 1000% watch tutorials online to give you that sensational experience.

Everytime you guys cuddle to sleep, you would still be a little awake to feel his hands tracing the features on your face. This habit of his pretty much became a routine that you have a harder time of sleeping if he isn't caressing your face.

He likes to reward you with kisses on the forehead everytime you get your work done. But that's not all, he'd always invent something new just for you. He may or may not have caught a sneak peek of your wishlist, and since some of the things you've wished for can be easily made by him. Why not save that money and let him do his magic?

He surprises you each time with the gifts and you are grateful every time.

Cuddles during movie night is a must!! I don’t know why but I just have a feeling this man probably has like a small cinema hidden in his lab.

You guys would always watch any TV series together, like one will not continue on to the next episode without the other there to watch it with them.

His cuddles are the best when you guys are watching romance movies. Especially during a romantic scene. His body would scoot closer to yours without him even realising. His arms around your body tightening slightly as he nuzzles his face a bit onto your skin.

100% supportive bf

[hermetiqa]

How can you improve as a person?

Content Warning: this reading mentions abuse and obsessive behaviors. Please don't continue if you think you might get triggered.

Close your eyes and take a deep breath before picking a pile. If you feel drawn to more than one pile, it's alright, you may take the piles that you're drawn to. What's important is to take it how it resonates and leave what doesn't.

PAID READINGS | TIP JAR | FEEDBACK

NOTE: Please feel free to give me a feedback on my asks about the reading! I would highly appreciate it and it'll be a huge help for me to save money for my tuition fee this year.

Pile 1

Hello there, Pile 1! There's a lot of energy from you here. In order for you to improve as a person, you need to know who you truly are. Because I feel like if someone asks you some questions to get to know you, you tend to think about it first because you don't really know the answer. What are your hobbies? What's your favorite color? What's your favorite number? What kind of things makes you happy? I feel like in these questions, you tend not to have a direct answer. And that's something you need to improve in yourself. You have to get to know yourself more and stop spending most of your time with other people. Take a break from helping them from time to time because they're taking advantage of you and your kindness. I'm getting some people pleaser energy. You have to learn to say no. You have to understand that when someone doesn't like you, that doesn't mean you're a bad person, nor does it mean that they're a bad person. Not everyone has to like you, and you should learn that and apply it to yourself. Get to know yourself better, spend more time with yourself. And stop depending on what others think of you.

Pile 2

Hello, Pile 2! I'm also getting a lot of energy from you here, but this is more like an energy that needs healing. That said, you can improve as a person by healing. I feel like you have a lot of unhealed wounds, especially from childhood. I feel like you grew up in an abusive household, whether physically, emotionally or mentally abusive. Whenever someone disagrees with your opinion or tells you that you did something wrong, you tend to be defensive even if they meant no harm towards you. I can see that you're distant from other people, even your friends, because you tend to overthink that you'll disappoint them one day and you'll only get hurt if you ever get close or attached to them. You're scared of change, and this is something you need to improve. You need to heal from your wounds because your unhealed wounds are what could cause you to be a toxic or an unhealthy person or even have a negative energy at times. You need to recognize your growth and appreciate yourself from time to time. Learn to love yourself. You also need to realize that just because you got triggered at certain times and situations doesn't mean you'll never heal from it. That simply means that you're still healing from it. And healing takes time. Don't rush it. It doesn't happen overnight.

Pile 3

Hello, Pile 3! Among these three readings, your reading is the one that has the strongest energy. I'm getting that you're struggling a lot, mentally and emotionally. It's like you tend to get affected by things that are conventionally simple (e.g. getting good grades)(I'm unsure if this is the correct term). And whenever you have to deal with this, you tend to lean towards your addictions and obsessive behaviors such as getting drunk, smoking at least 5 sticks a day, staying up until 6AM, not eating on time, and using your computer a lot, especially to play video games. I can see that this is your way of coping with your inner struggles because you could have a low self-esteem and you're pressured by other people around you. You tend to compare yourself to other people a lot too and you feel bad and pity yourself whenever you realize that they're better than you, in your opinion at least. You need to improve this. Just like Pile 2, you need to love yourself. You might not be a people pleaser but you tend to shut other people out before they even get to know you because you think they're better off without you. You need to improve your self-esteem. You need to trust in yourself and believe that you matter too. You have to give yourself the stability within yourself. Love yourself. Change your bad habits. It doesn't happen in a blink of an eye, so take one step at a time. Change it little by little and don't rush yourself. Engage in healthy habits and be productive because this way, you'll be able to actually love yourself, appreciate yourself and realize that you matter just as much as any other person on this planet.

[jewish-vents]

Lost another friend and need to rant about it. This is gonna be long and all over the place: apologies in advance.

I hate how unfair the world is to us. I hate how all the good leftist principles apply to every minority except us. I hate how the world ensures we see that it treats us differently so we can feel totally isolated (we are) and give up. I hate how we aren't given basic human decency like everyone else. I hate how even as I write this, I fear being misunderstood.

I'm a "Jew of color" and the gentile who I am no longer friends with is POC like me. I had to cut them off because they have more contempt towards me (they also treat me like I'm the representative of all Jews) than white people.

I express my experiences with antisemitism and my sadness about how bad antisemitism is right now? They would tell me I'm insensitive and selfish because Palestine. "Just go outside and you'll be fine" but going outside is how I experience antisemitism. Antisemitism is a real thing, I would say. It's not just a few hate comments on a screen by trolls like Hitlerfan123. We are not safe anywhere and we can't hide. This isn't an exaggeration to trick you like the evil Jew I am. And they would just bring up Palestine again. And again. To shut me down and to shut me out. I would get defensive and they'd tell me that I'm acting like a white person. White tears. White fragility. BUT YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO ME, I would say. And they'd tell me I'm acting hysterical. That the zionists put me in some delusion where the world is out to get me but I'm actually fine and no one wants to hurt Jews.

"You're acting like a white person who says "we get hate crimed too" whenever a poc talks about their oppression" they said. They made a few comparisons like that. I tried so hard to get them to understand me. To acknowledge our pain.

Don't they know I can feel pain too? I observed how they would constantly post stuff like "minorities must stick together". They would keep an eye on hate crimes for everyone but us and actually listen to their stories. Do they even know how soul crushing that is? To feel so completely alone?

I couldn't even talk about the Holocaust with them. Every time I tried to, they'd have to say "the Holocaust isn't unique and all genocides are connected" at least once. And it's so fucking unfair. Why are we the only ones being told "we're not special"? These "you and your experiences aren't unique" conversations start and stop with us. I would never, ever tell anyone slavery isn't unique because slavery was unique. I would never go up to someone and tell them oh btw the genocide of your people wasn't unique. That's EVIL. And yet it only happens to us. Before anyone misunderstands me, I know right wingers routinely say this to minorities. But the whole bird mocks and belittles us. Regular people go out of their way to remind us "we're not unique or special". I shouldn't have to give a million disclaimers either. Only we are told our genocide isn't special. I honestly wouldn't care if the people who told me that said the same thing about other genocides. But they never do. They'll go on to talk about how unique every other genocide is and then come back to us with "the Holocaust isn't unique". You only ever talk about the Holocaust when it's time to say "everything's connected" and yet you're surprised I call you an antisemite?! If you can't talk about the Holocaust without mentioning other genocides and other minorities, you can't gaslight me into thinking I'm an anti-intersectionality asshole.

And then there's the speaking over us thing. I dumped my ex friends who were all POC/queer/etc for this very reason. I'm on the floor in pain sobbing about antisemitism and you think you know being a Jew more than me. I say something like "hey Zionist can be a slur towards Jews" and you immediately disagree and try to argue with me. "But my other Jewish friend said otherwise so I don't believe you". Or "This random Jew i follow online says otherwise". I have never been so dehumanized.

Can't forget the "weaponization of antisemitism" thing. I hear this all the time now. Who do they think they are? Gentiles have never felt more comfortable. They are afraid to criticize or say anything about other minorities and will even bend for them but with us, it's "Jews cry antisemitism". And as I said to my ex friends, don't be shy. Expand this convo TO EVERYONE YOU PRICKS. Tell POC they weaponize racism. Tell gay people they weaponize homophobia. And they never do. Because anything flies with Jews and Jews alone.

Okay rant over. I hate this world

.

[sleepymccoy]

Spones fake romance subplots that make me want to write normal star trek episode scripts (can you imagine?),

Spock is required to battle some alien thing, and spend the night beforehand alone under alien observation. He was injured so Kirk is desperate for McCoy to get access to him. Kirk finds out that spouses are the exception and insists that Spock and McCoy are married. They have to act married with absolutely no chance to set boundaries or communicate what they're doing beyond a hasty whisper

On some planet and they do something together that the culture accept as a proposal (walking through an archway, getting excited about the same xenobiology thing, whatev) and no matter what Spock and McCoy say the aliens believe they're newly engaged and insist on throwing a party in their honour. Kirk tells them to play along please, they're so excited and it's making things easier. Also it's hilarious.

They need to travel through alien space that requires all people in their space be married (cultural thing about single people being half a person, not able to hold a job). Spock and McCoy team up cos neither of them want to, but at least the Vulcan privacy customs will mean they don't have to PDA. Unfortunately, they keep having to attend diplomatic dinners and Kirk insists they at least compliment each other occasionally, ffs

The enterprise is in trouble for some fuckery and everyone is on their best behaviour. Spock and McCoy get caught fighting somewhere inappropriate within starfleet because they weren't paying attention to where they were walking. While getting a dressing down Spock knows the admiral telling them off is a romantic so he says that he and McCoy were kissing. McCoy, head in hands, cannot disagree or it'll make things worse. "Yep, we were making out." So they have to play a couple from then. Kirk loves it. He involves it in their trial defence.

Classic hiding from the cops on some planet behaviour and in order to give themselves an alibi for being found in a cupboard they make out. They then have to, individually in their interrogation cells, try and guess what romantic backstory the other would be spinning and do their best to match it. They do a terrible job

They go to a conference together and get cheaper tickets by applying for the travel as a pair. They put themselves down as colleagues on everything, but when they get to the cruise they're in the honeymoon suite and an attendant politely advises them to play along or they'll be bumped to the next ship. McCoy finds a way to deeply enjoy every moment until things actually get a little bit romantic and then he's super uncomfortable. Spock appears unaffected (he's very affected).

McCoy starts addressing Spock by Vulcan pet names to be a shit stirrer and some diplomat overhears it and deduces that they're secretly dating. Lots of the diplomat finding ways to leave the two of them alone, but Spock and McCoy are none the wiser and just enjoy a squabble. Ep ends with the diplomat winking at them as they all stare blankly, before being transported away

Similar, but post Katra some Vulcan assumes that Spock and McCoy were married and asks all these questions about it over dinner, but doesn't outright say it so everyone's just answering the weird questions as honestly as they can. Nothing they say makes it clear that they aren't dating until like the end of the dinner. McCoy loses his shit about it

Spock is required to mindmeld with McCoy for some plot reason, the aliens they're with think it's awesome and are like!! Can you do that on everyone!!! So cool! So Spock is like, "nope, only McCoy. Because... We're... Married?" And McCoy will always support Spock in a consent thing, and mind melds are v invasive for him, but even so. They're only on the planet for the first like fifteen min, the rest is them on the ship with McCoy making endless fun of Spock over it

Someone is hitting on McCoy but he's not keen. Lets her down easy by saying he's seeing someone. Spock wanders by as this convo is wrapping up and due to convoluted shit pretends he's the someone. McCoy is grateful, but very annoyed about how it all worked out really. But when they have a fight the lady shoots her shot again so McCoy gets like romantic about it to keep the story alive

Actually hell yeah, what's your favourite?

[theniftycat]

How to stay sane when history keeps happening

I don't think it's stopping any time soon, guys. It's okay if you're confused, upset, angry, apathetic etc. You are allowed to feel anything. Your internal life is fully yours.

Don't feel like you're obliged to explain yourself to anyone. You are just one person. Your social life isn't political. Don't speak if you don't want to. Don't speak if you feel it could hurt you. Don't speak if you're not sure. Don't speak if speaking makes you feel uneasy.

Remember that responsibility is proportionate to power. If you hold no tangible political power, you share no guilt, no responsibility. It applies to public figures too. Unless you did the deed, you aren't responsible for it.

The only person you can demand to take a moral stance is yourself. Everybody else is responsible for it only before themselves.

Remember that you can't know the whole truth, the fog of war is a real thing. Confusion is normal to feel, remember that everybody else is confused too.

Keeping that in mind, find some source you can address yourself to. No need to trust anyone completely, just find someone whose coverage is easy for you to digest.

Try not to lose the social connections that are important to you, especially, in real life. Social connections are the biggest source of happiness and security. If you disagree with someone, remember that each one of you could be wrong and probably is at least partially wrong. Confusion is normal. Try avoiding the topic if the person is really important to you. Don't ruin relationships with those dearest to you, they will help you irl regardless of politics.

Don't feel obliged to keep up with the news. If the news upset you, you not knowing them won't make the world a worse place.

Don't hold yourself responsible for other people's opinions. Everybody answers for themselves. Being wrong is something people do.

Remember what is normal. Keep normalcy in mind. Remember what healthy conversations are like, remember what peace is like. Remember what freedom is like. One day, everything will need to be rebuilt. And you'll be there to do it.

Your job is to keep yourself who you are in normal times. You needn't be destroyed or made miserable. Keep yourself healthy if you can. Remember that there are good things that are worth striving for.

Most of this advice came from Ekaterina Schulmann and it kept me sane for the last year and a half.

[pascaloverx]

UNREQUITED LOVE

Summary: Being a new student is already complicated. But when you end up developing an unwanted crush on a schoolmate, everything seems to get worse. This particular schoolmate is romantically involved with someone. And to make matters worse, the popular school quarterback starts to bother you.

Author's Note: This fanfic will be short and set in the universe of the movie Bottoms (2023), directed by Emma Seligman, using the characters from the film. The characters do not belong to me. The fanfic will not strictly follow all the situations from the movie. I hope you enjoy it. Initially, there will be no adult content. There will only be inappropriate language and scenes of violence.

THREE FINAL

FOUR

A party at Rockbridge Falls High is just what you needed to feel more welcome. It’s been a week since you and Hazel kissed, a week since she answered that phone call from PJ. Ever since then, you’ve been trying to pretend nothing happened, attempting to socialize normally with PJ, Hazel, Josie, and Isabel. What that really means is that you haven’t been alone with Hazel since that kiss, in any situation. Your plan is to avoid Hazel and Jeff whenever possible. Unfortunately, it’s much harder to do than you thought. Jeff has taken a liking to teasing you, making it nearly impossible to actually avoid him. But avoiding Hazel is easier. Do you want to kiss her again? Yes. Do you want to dive into the drama of being involved with her? Absolutely not.

“I heard they’re looking for someone to take Brittany’s spot at the kissing booth. Any of you thinking of taking the risk?” Josie says, casually addressing the group. You, Josie, Isabel, Hazel, and PJ are all standing together, though you’ve positioned yourself far from PJ and Hazel. Regardless of their refusal to label themselves as a couple, you prefer to see them that way. It makes resisting the temptation much easier.

“I didn’t know there’d be a kissing booth. Seems like the kind of activity that could get messy. I mean, what if you end up having to kiss the wrong person? Like someone who’s already taken or someone unbearable, like Jeff? No offense, Isabel,” PJ says with a brief smile. Isabel bursts into laughter along with Josie. You, however, can’t even muster a laugh, consumed by the thought of “kissing someone who’s already taken.”

“A kiss doesn’t always have to mean something deeper. Sometimes we need to let go of the idea that kisses always have meaning, because they might not mean anything at all,” you say, interjecting, sounding a bit defensive. Your words come out slightly awkward, but Hazel looks at you, almost as if she’s upset—or maybe that’s just in your head.

“I have to disagree with you on that, Y/N. I think a kiss usually means something, even if it’s just pure physical attraction,” PJ says, and you look at her the way a sinner might look at a priest—desperate to confess. But how would that go? Would you just blurt out that you kissed Hazel? That you enjoyed being with her almost-girlfriend?

“But she could be right, at least in theory—a kiss is just a kiss. Nothing more. Like at a kissing booth, you kiss a bunch of different people, and it doesn’t mean anything beyond the potential for some weird mouth disease,” Josie chimes in, almost as if she’s secretly saving you. You feel a slight sense of relief, until you remember that you didn’t kiss Hazel at a kissing booth. So, Josie’s logic doesn’t apply to your situation at all.

“I believe it depends on who you kiss. If you kiss someone you have feelings for, you might not think it means nothing. Sometimes, you might even realize you want to keep kissing that person, even if they don’t feel the same.” Hazel says, catching you off guard. You suddenly feel cornered. Then, a rather foolish idea pops into your head.

“Guys, this conversation is great, but Brittany just messaged me saying if she has to kiss one more guy from the team, she’s going to lose it. Does anyone here think they could take her place? She promised me Jeff’s already passed by the booth, so he probably won’t show up again,” Isabel says, genuinely trying to help her friend. You feel like you’re the only one who could appropriately step in, being the single one in the group. Not to mention, it would prove that you don’t think kisses are all that meaningful.

“I’ll do it. You can let her know. I think it’ll be fun,” you say, more to convince yourself than to truly declare it. Isabel beams happily, while PJ and Josie cheer you on. Hazel, however, stays silent.

“And obviously, if you want to bail, we’ll be your alibi. We could try to distract someone, but it won’t be easy,” Josie says, attempting to offer support, though it’s not particularly reassuring. You wave to Brittany, who looks far too exhausted to show any excitement. It only takes a few minutes for you to take her place at the kissing booth.

Immediately bracing yourself to kiss strangers, you glance at the line of people waiting. What a terrible idea, kissing random people to prove that a kiss that meant so much to you didn’t mean anything at all. You give the first person in line—a girl who smelled of lavender—a slow, lingering kiss. She wasn’t a bad kisser, either. As you prepare for the next kiss, Jeff barges in like a peacock, pushing everyone aside, and stands right in front of you.

“What are you doing here, Jeff?” you ask, impatience clear in your voice, barely resisting the urge to roll your eyes or, worse, jump at his throat.

"Nerd," Jeff sneers, "I heard you were handing out your lips, so I had to make sure it wasn’t some cruel joke. Weren’t you supposed to be saving yourself for marriage or the convent?" His mocking tone is met with laughter from the rest of his teammates. It’s unbelievable how they all find his terrible joke amusing—none of them seem to have a real sense of humor anyway.

“Look, I get that you're just another jerk with an ego bigger than your head, but I find it hard to understand how my lips and what I do with them are any of your business,” you retort, moving closer to Jeff, your face inches from his. You lean back against the booth’s structure, and Jeff lets out an awkward laugh, clearly thrown off.

Before the awkwardness fully settles over Jeff, he suddenly leans in and steals a kiss. Not just a slow peck, but a full kiss. It's unsettling how well he kisses, and for a brief moment, you forget that you should be reacting to his ridiculous and forceful act. But as soon as his lips touch yours, you snap back and shove him away. Without hesitation, you throw a punch directly at his nose, hoping you’ve broken it.

"Are you trying to kill me, nerd? What the hell!" Jeff yells, spouting curses as he clutches his nose, which starts bleeding from the punch. You can see tears welling up in his eyes as he runs toward his friends. Great. For the second time in your life, you’re about to get expelled for punching a quarterback—or whatever Jeff is.

You leave the kissing booth without a second thought about who was in line or who should take your place. You just needed to walk and clear your head. Avoiding the girls entirely, you ran aimlessly until you reached the parking lot. Among the rows of cars, you leaned against the one you recognized—Hazel’s. With your eyes closed, you take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself down.

"That was quite the punch you gave Jeff. I had a feeling you'd be here for some reason, and here you are—our newest heroine," Hazel says as she approaches you. You glance at her, clearly irritated, not in the mood for jokes, and she seems to pick up on that.

“Take a good look at this reckless fool,” you say, voice laced with regret. “In just a few weeks, I managed to kiss someone who’s taken and get kissed by a complete idiot. I even hurt my hand throwing that damn punch. Can you imagine how many ways they'll expel me if Jeff’s seriously hurt? I don’t even want to think about it.” You sigh, wishing you had aimed somewhere less obvious on Jeff. And maybe you shouldn’t have kissed Hazel either. But as you look at her now, smiling at you while stepping closer, you know deep down you probably would’ve kissed her anyway.

“He harassed you. Plus, Jeff will probably prefer to spread rumors or something instead. Admitting he got beat up by a girl is way too progressive for guys like him. But if you broke his nose, you’ll probably have to pay his hospital bill,” Hazel says, still smiling as she leans against the hood of her car next to you. You glance at her, judging her for being terrible at offering comfort.

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re terrible at being a shoulder to cry on? Now I’m going to spend the rest of the night wishing for an expulsion,” you say, playfully poking Hazel in the arm before breaking into a smile.

“Has anyone ever told you that when you smile like that, you don’t look like a crazy person who hands out well-deserved punches and regrets things you shouldn’t?” Hazel says, her gaze steady on you. “I just want to make it clear that I don’t regret our kiss. I don’t think it was wrong either. I’m not committed, and neither are you.” You let out a long sigh, wishing you could fully believe her.

“You’re really tied to PJ, Hazel. I don’t want to be caught in the middle of you two while you’re still in love with her. We can pretend the kiss never happened and just try to be friends,” you suggest, resigning yourself to the fact that there will never be anything between you and Hazel.

“If you can forget about that kiss, I must have done something very wrong.” Hazel says in a playful, almost teasing tone, causing you to smile in response.

She looks at you, and you look back at her; both of you instantly aware that you want to repeat the previous mistake—the kiss. Before either of you can think of any reason not to kiss again, your lips meet hers. She leans her body against yours, pressing you down onto the hood of the car, savoring the kiss as if it were essential to her existence. You surrender to the moment, feeling Hazel’s hand caress your face as she kisses you passionately. For today, you don’t want to think about your mistakes or their consequences; you just want to focus on how being so close to Hazel brings you the comfort you’ve been longing for.

[doberbutts]

I very much see your points! I suppose the only real difference between your viewpoint and mine stands in the fact that while yes, I do agree that to use the terms TME/TMA to sort of "gatekeep" specific experiences is bad, I feel like that's more of an issue with individual (although decently widespread, unfortunately) misappropriation of the language, rather than a conceptual flaw with the framework. I believe there's a lot of people who intend to use the terms correctly, and if and when they happen not to we should aim to correct that individual behavior rather than throw the baby out with the water, so to speak. I do understand that it's a bit of a tall ask when everyone's at each other's throats and often not willing to return the favor, but at the very least that's what we should strive for if we want to reach mutual understanding (I say all this knowing that's your goal too, I wouldn't assume otherwise).

After all, I do believe that the way "transandrodorks" are treated stems from a similar misunderstanding or overgeneralization of what we actually stand for, and an unwillingness to reach out a hand and actually listen to what we have to say rather than assume the worst from a few bad actors. That's why when the positions are reversed I want to at least try to reach out and meet the other party in the middle, even if the same courtesy isn't always afforded to me.

As for your example with Caster Semenya, I do believe that intersex people should absolutely be allowed to use the term TMA to refer to themselves regardless of AGAB if they feel it's appropriate, as their experiences often exist outside the strict framework we tend to employ and they would know best which terminology applies to them and which doesn't (and should also obviously allowed to make up their own when needed). I don't see eye to eye with anyone who advocates for TMA/TME while disagreeing on this point (and I'll admit I'm not sure what the general consensus here is).

And as for the other example, I'm a bit hesitant to continue that specific analogy (which I do believe to be absolutely valid, btw) since I'm white and I would rather not say anything out of turn, so I'll instead offer the usual rebuttal to the analogous point: when someone who is TME experiences transmisogyny, it's an atomic experience, not continuous. They might be mistaken for a trans woman, but as they are not actually a trans woman they don't live in the same state of constant fear and threat of (this specific type of) violence. They can prove they're not transfem, and the attack will stop, or at least lessen. They have the option of simply not being transfem, something which obviously isn't afforded to transfems. That doesn't mean that the experience they went through didn't affect them, or did so less, but they would live it differently from someone who would be the actual intended target.

Now, I relayed that point but I personally am not sure I agree with it 100%, specifically the latter half. If the TME person being attacked happens to be another trans person, rather than cis, they don't get to escape the danger through proving they're not transfem, because then they're just trading a type of violence for another (the one actually meant to target them, which might look differently). Not to mention that you won't always be in a situation where you can/want to prove it, or where the other party will believe you or care either way. I guess the bigger point here is that if you're TME you're not always experiencing transmisogyny in every facet of your life, though.

Either way I believe there's plenty of more nuance that could be had here, and in that sense I do dislike how that's lost when using TME/TMA, but as terms they were never intended to encompass every possible experience in shorthand but rather just give a general idea, which could then be complemented by any additional info you would be willing to share.

Ah but you see, that's the talking over someone else's experience I'm talking about.

When TME people experience transmisogyny, it is incidental and not continuous. Well. For some, like my example of the idiot mistaking me for Mexican for being brown while saying a French word, that is true. I am not commonly mistaken for Mexican, though it's not unheard of, and it hasn't happened in years. Specifically, when I stopped wearing my hair long and started binding, I stopped being read as *Dominican* (which racist people do not see the difference between the various Latin American countries) and thus stopped experiencing this problem. It's incidental, but I still think that the best choice is to ally with Mexicans and other Latinos and Hispanics to stop the bigoted behavior from happening altogether.

But what happens when it IS continuous? Black cis women, also labeled TME, are disproportionately transvestigated and heavily punished by transmisogynist laws and rulings despite not being transgender themselves. Not only does showing birth certificates not help (and, also, I think this is Bad Logic, because if I have to show my personal private documents in order to be left alone, I'm still being Affected By The Oppression because I have to carry my documents everywhere. Like that's just Baby's First Fascism) but I have personally witnessed multiple black celebrity and politician cis women be forced to prove they are women *while they are pregnant*. And yes, that is misogynoir. But it is practiced by utilizing the exact same societal systems to hurt trans women. Thus my logic on the other post- all oppression hooks into each other and back onto itself somehow. Not only is that not incidental and very much continuous, but this a systemic problem and why cis and trans women and *especially* any person of color regardless of gender should ally among themselves to fight it.

And, finally "they can prove they're not trans fem and the attack will stop or lessen"- sure, much like how Hannah Gadsby was able to say "no no I'm not a faggot you see I am a lady a woman no man-liker here" and the guy left her alone wait no he didn't he beat the shit out of her anyway. Like that's the problem I have with this- the reality is that this does not apply to every single person and that real living people are being hurt and sometimes killed while being labeled exempt from the very thing that kills them. We have had cis people die due to bathroom laws meant to hurt trans women. It is absolutely not a matter of just proving you're not one because transmisogyny is one help of a drug and it is used as a dangerous weapon to any and everyone it's pointed towards.

And that is the crux of my problem. People can use whatever words they like to describe their own experiences. Pointing these words to describe someone else's experiences for them, however, and denying that their very real lived experiences have happened or that it matters less is where I draw the line.

[chaifootsteps]

Hey Chai,

This is a long one, so I’m gonna start out by first thanking you for this blog you’ve created as a safe place to share your thoughts and those of others, including when they disagree with you! You are both admirably unabashed and pleasantly down to earth in how you carry yourself on here! Now to get into the meat of it, I felt like sending in my thoughts on the idea of “wasted potential” as applied specifically to Lucifer from Haz_bin Ho_tel, and to ask you for your thoughts on that concept and Lucifer as a specific example (if you wanted to share them, of course)! I want to clarify that I’ve never personally liked referring to characters, story beats, or theme explorations in a piece of fictional media as “wasted potential” because some part of me feels that I don’t get to make that judgement call when I wasn’t the one writing. This isn’t me claiming that I am better or more mature than people who discuss wasted potential within media analysis - I am well aware that I am entitled to dislike the direction a character or story is heading as much as any human - this is just me saying that I personally never try and act like I could speak on knowing what was better for someone else’s creative vision, so I just tend to keep my thoughts to myself. Until I witnessed what Vi_v did to Lucifer. Memes are funniest when quoted ironically, but it was after episode six that I sincerely said out loud to myself “look how they massacred my boy!”

In the days of the pilot and promotional character art, Lucifer was my favorite character. Viewers barely knew anything about him, but the little we did know was OVERFLOWING WITH POTENTIAL. He was my favorite character design in the entire show, and a near hyperfixation in my mind. The limited information and visuals we were given were those of a well dressed, unwaveringly confident, and - seemingly - unapologetically aware player in a story about the slaughter of sinners and the near-lost cause of Charlie’s efforts towards their redemption. He was the King of Hell, husband to the first woman in existence, instigator of human sin, and REBEL AGAINST GOD. Even juicier, assuming we never got to see him as his own character, there was at least the mystique of the domino affect he had on the characters of the show including Charlie, Alastor, and even Vaggie as Charlie’s girlfriend and a fallen angel, herself. The second-hand accounts we heard of him through Charlie - specifically “I think dad was right about me-“ and “- you don’t take shit from other demons!” - depicted a character who had little sympathy for Charlie’s goal or the sinners while still showing his care for her in his own, twisted way. All of this oozed with POTENTIAL for the enormity of this character and his weight on the story as the embodiment of pride and as the King of Hell.

And we, the audience of the final product, got NONE OF THAT. The final character - the canon depiction thrown at our faces following over four years of anticipation - was a self-pitying, judgmental, immature, wishy-washy, absentee father who remained WILLFULLY unaware of the life and ambitions of the singular child he claimed he wanted a better relationship with and took ZERO accountability in running the very people and kingdom he had been stuck with for 10,000 years! He didn’t even know his daughter, the princess of Hell and his most treasured family, had a girlfriend of multiple years. In a lot of ways, he was a well-dressed man-child constantly shouting some version of “I DON’T WANNA!”. 

And GOD did that hurt to see. How it hurt to see his wasted potential. 

There were so many things he could have been starting in late 2019, so many things that seemed perfect for both a character and story beat as would have explored the greater themes of the show itself. Unfortunately, he wasn’t any of them on that particular day in late January of 2024. The CLOSEST he ever gets to embodying that potential was when he was protecting his daughter while beating the holy light out of Adam in the finale, but even his statement of “You’re in my house, bitch!” doesn’t depict the imposing and unmeasurably egotistical being of pride he seemed to be in 2019, it just sounds like something any person would say in a cocky manner punching down on someone who broke into their house. For me, it took the wind out of my sails to see how far my once adored character had fallen from the character he COULD have been. How he had been denied all the potential that he once had. Potential that, through writing choices by the creative team, was decidedly "wasted".

So those are my feelings as applies to both the concept of “wasted potential” in writing and to the character of Lucifer in Haz_bin Ho_tel. I apologize again for how long this whole rant has been, but if you have any of your own thoughts or want to comment on my whole spiel around how we describe wasted potential as viewers and Lucifer as a possible example, I would be excited to hear them!

Thank you again for this space you have created and keep fighting the good fight, even if that’s just for the freedom to our own opinions on popular media!

No apologies, Anon, and thank you for the kind words! Everyone should feel like they have a safe, fun place to bitch about how much they dislike popular media...whether HH runs for one more season or 10, I'll do my best to keep this little pocket available!

Thank you for your heartfelt Lucifer thoughts. I know back in the day, when I still loved and had high hopes for this show and actually hoped Viv could get Weird Al to voice Lucifer, this was the thing that made me really fall in love with him. If I'd known back then that he'd turn into a crude, idiotic frat boy, I wouldn't have bothered.

I think the longer these shows run, the more it gets to be that people are mourning their favorite characters and the potential they could have had. It's pretty painful to love a character so deeply, to be so excited to see what they become, and to be rewarded with the worst possible version of them you could imagine. Happened with Stolas for me, with Lucifer for you...it's a story you hear time and time again.

It sucks.

[katerinaaqu]

I remember reading a post from someone who said that for greek retellings, it's more understandable to change elements if the way people perceive these things also change. Meaning, if for example the sexual abuse of war prisoners wasn't seen as rape or cheating when the story was written, it's logical to then change it in the retelling so that sexual abuse never happened in the first place because a modern audience would give a different significance in that act than they would've in ancient greece. Basically, to change the event but keep the same significance/to keep the intended perception from the original. I think it was also in relation to Circe when it was said, and there I think a problem is very apparent in that stance because people are debating to this day whether or not Circe raped Odysseus.

But anyway I think the argument was something like, what had happened with Circe was not intended to be read as rape and it wouldn't be seen as that using the standards of ancient greece, so it's logical then that this aspect was changed in epic the musical.

I don't have a lot of classical knowledge but I found this line of thinking interesting but very ripe with potential discourse because it's hard to prescribe a general 'morality' to an entire civilization or to definitely say what the author of a piece intended something to be or not to be.

But that's what retellings would have been interesting for because it reflects how an author interpreted the story and the way they decided to change or keep certain elements of the original plot hint at how they personally perceived the meaning of the story. Except that nowadays a lot of authors don't really do that anymore, because instead of engaging with the original they just use it as a springboard for their own story they want to tell... for me that's the biggest difference between a true retelling and one that is only in name only, not how loyal it is to the original, but how much you can see the author engaging and reflecting on the original story and their own interpretation of it (which however does mean that the author has to stay loyal to a certain degree to the story ofc)

i think i prefer a greek retelling that puts forward an interpretation i absolutely disagree with but at least it's therefore engaging with the original than one that doesn't at all and just regurgitates the same cookie cutter modern tropes like the girlboss and her broody bad boy love interest but with famous greek characters instead (*coughs* persephone and hades are so often victims of this)

Sorry for that long rambling but I was curious about what you think of this method of construing retellings because I know you had vehement disagreements especially with how Circe was handled and this also just shows the starkly different interpretations so many have taken away from that part in the odyssey. Especially also the discussion of odysseus having also had slaves and whether or not it should or shouldn't be included in a modern retelling when in the past that was custom.

Well the first one is not entirely true. Rapes were more likely common (unfortunately) in antiquity but they were not seen as insignificant (see for example how Locrian Ajax chased after Cassandra and she tried to save herself to the temple of Athena and when she was raped in a sanctuary the others wanted to stone him to death for his crimes). Rapes of free people was never seen as insignificant but of course unfortunately in fever of battle like atrocities were unfortunately expected to happen but of course after women were taken as slaves then the aspect of rape no longer applied due to the fact that they were slaves now but Rapes of citizens even at times of war were never approved. Which is another misconception. Rapes were never approved but at times of war atrocities were unfortunately commonplace. Is similar to murder. Murder was never approved but at times of war even outside battles murders are generally added to the war casualties. But prisoners of war if turned into slaves then yeah they have no rights anymore.

I disagree on that. If you remove the historical background then you already have lost the game. Is like saying if you make a movie about prisoners or something and because you feel bad for them you change the cultural background of 21st century and you make it sound like the prisoners are not inside a room but have a good time in nature. Immediately the whole concept of a 21st century prison is lost and people get the wrong idea of it (sorry for the bad example but it is a way to see how important it is to keep the cultural background and that if you change it just because you feel bad then you twist everything unrepairably)

Odysseus had lack of choice. It is not rape in general but he still had no choice but to bed Circe (with Calypso is clear as day that it was rape) but again I disagree that it made sense what they did in Epic. Epic ignored the basic factors of the story such as Circe. You don't even need to touch the subject of rape or not. Just add the story because like I said the way it was presented not even the story he wanted to make the whole "monster" thing made no sense. It would have made more sense to show him being forced to stay with Ciece and break down in anger afterwards than whatever the hell we got in Epic. He just gets angry after he gets an act of kindness from Circe. Even in that narrative of Epic the Odyssey plot would make more sense in my opinion. You don't need to read it as a rape or comment to it as such. Just show the story. Show how it was done without commentary or something and let the audience decide. I love it how modern retellings claim they want to show "the hidden thoughts of women" and such but when it comes to Odysseus staying in an island with a goddess they are like "fuck it he is a cheater and we are feeling uncomfortable to touch the subject and interpret it as rape so just change it" and the idea is as frustrating as it is wrong in my opinion

Again I disagree because the one change brings the other and they start as a "awwww I feel bad to show slavery in the hands of the heroes so let's just idealized them" and then you get to this that the so called "retellings" barely follow the same direction as the stories they claim to adapt (and sometimes not even that) and we should be grateful for it 🙄. The mentality of "I prefer the twisted version as long as it is presented" like I said it is the equivalent of someone feeling uncomfortable with history of modern day and change the hell outta it and claim it is better like someone make a movie about Nobel and be like "awww but is impossible such a selfless person make dynamite so it wasn't him! Nobel just happened to be there and then Hitler's grandfather made it!" And so people in 23rd century think that Nobel didn't create the dynamite and we are lucky that at least we have Nobel related to the dynamite story even if the retelling has nothing to do with history but yeah at least we have Nobel and dynamite in the same story

See what I mean? It makes no sense

We can choose to "hide behind our finger" as we say in Greece or put our head in the sand and avoid the subjects that make us feel uncomfortable and even worse twist them to the point of making that story unrecognizable or we can for once have the balls to show things as they are supposed to be. It is not a matter what you "should do" is a matter that it is something that was written down and so if one claims to transfer that to screen or to stage or something they can choose to sugar cot it but that is not the story. Much worse if they make the story so unrecognizable that it is teagicomical.

It all started with "sure we can omit this detail because it is not compatibility with our morality" and nowadays we have things that create so many changes like whatever happened with the musical and we feel "grateful" that the story is even remotely following the same direction (and on the musical plot not even that happens anymore! Look what happened with Charybdis for example) so yeah I disagree but I definitely see your point and okay it would definitely be better to show something even if it is not 100% accurate but this logic shows how low the bar is in my opinion and it shows how much we have lost the essence of creating content based on stories. And the misconceptions and fabrications that happen with such material are a direct result of this. That culture and story doesn't really matter or that it shouldn't be shown properly because they make us feel uncomfortable and then the other end of the spectrum happens that people fabricate and demonize history or mythology to make some point for another political message.

I hope this is what answers you expected. I am sorry if I misunderstood something.

[smiski-collector]

why are you running

pairings: Lamina x Treech (past), Treech X Reader warnings: self-sabotage reader, pining feelings, ghosting

prologue

When Lamina and Treech broke up in second year of college, it was a shell shock for everyone that knew them including you, mostly because you attended high school with them. And also because you knew they were officially dating in sophomore year of high school but definitely had feelings for much longer than that. People on their level of closeness do not develop feelings out of nowhere after all. 

However, you mused, people changed because their breakup was something you did not expect at all. You had a feeling it was going to happen of course, from when Coral would invite you to hang out with the Pack, consisting of herself, Treech, and Tanner as well as mutuals. Her eyes would flicker between Treech and Lamina before going back to you, smiling sheepishly. You had smiled back, hopefully in a comforting manner, being understanding.  

When Lamina left, “To Sweden,” you overheard her saying sweetly, eagerly, “The art program I applied to accepted me and I am leaving early to get used to the environment before I start,” something changed in Treech. You saw it in the science classes you had with him, watching him from a distance. His eyes were sometimes red, voice quieter, and bags darker. 

You felt pity for the guy but did not dare to overstep to help him. He never snapped at you, was always cordial or friendly but that did not mean you could reach out to him about the very obvious breakup. It is a boundary that was clear to everyone that would drift close to the topic. Even his friends that knew the both of them did not push on the topic.  

You only had the chance to bring up Lamina to Treech in your third year at a party hosted by Coriolanus Snow, having been invited by Lucy Gray. She was a social butterfly, having befriended nearly everyone with her chirpy presence, positive energy, and beautiful voice. Their relationship is something you did not want to dissect, as they had been on and off ever since they met at a mixer hosted by Snow’s co-ed fraternity in their freshman year. 

Treech had been at the party, dragged by Coral and Tanner he said, to avoid being miserable that Friday night and begin the process of moving on. You were endeared by his sleepy demeanor, flushed cheeks, and an openness that you would not have normally been privy to. 

He put his face into his palms, bent over his knees, voice muffled as he asked, “But how could I move on when it feels like I would be losing such a big part of myself.” 

“It is not my place to agree or disagree with them,” you say to him, “But I know Coral and from seeing her tough love for her friends, I think it is good to give it a shot. And you wouldn’t be losing yourself, you would be closing one chapter of your life.” 

Treech went quiet after that and nodded off, slumping over on a couch. His head curved dangerously close to your shoulder and you stayed by his side, scooting over to provide distance once he was steadied, and content on pondering life quietly, sipping on your own beverage. Coral eventually came over having spotted a passed out Treech, Tanner following closely behind with a red party cup in hand. They were panting and it was obvious Treech somehow managed to lose them in the party, causing panic to ensue. 

Tanner giggled, poking Treech’s face,  “Sorry about him,” he eventually said, “He doesn’t usually drink at parties, something about not being able to experience it fully.” Coral snorted in agreeance, shaking her head in fondness? Or maybe it was exasperated. 

You smile back at him, waving your red solo cup as you spoke, “It’s all good, I figured he needed someone to talk to.” You may have been a stranger to him and he might not even remember that he spoke to you at all, but you are glad that he at least got some of his worries off of his chest. 

The next day, Treech treated you normally, distantly or so you thought. Because the following day, it was Treech that invited you to hang out instead of Coral. He wanted to get to know you better, he said. You gradually went from hanging out with the Pack, playing music, going to cafes, to hanging out with Treech alone. 

Treech seemed to like your presence and you were not one to ignore your friend’s needs. So when Treech would call you in the middle of the night sobbing about Lamina, you would oblige, listening to his woes and regrets of the relationship. These calls became a regular occurence, expanding to video calls in the middle of the night, not always about Lamina, and you loathe to admit it but you were beginning to develop a crush on him. You couldn’t help it. 

Soon enough, instead of Lamina and Treech, it was you and Treech, with a weekly schedule of going to each other’s place to play board games (“sore loser” he called you teasingly) or to study for the science classes you shared as pre-med tracks. You were shocked when you found out Treech was pre-med but he said it was what his older brother, Cypress, did so he just made time for music. 

By this point, you thought that maybe Treech had moved on. It had been about a year and half since Lamina left and you had entertained the idea of asking him but didn’t dare to bring it up, knowing their history. 

Nothing could have hurt you more than the lack of explanation when Treech stopped texting when he would come over. You felt used. 

You could not hold it against him because you knew Treech did not hurt people on purpose. He just couldn’t help it because Lamina returned from Sweden, she was his comfort, what he was used to. He does still try to include you in his life, a bit differently than before but you were still there. 

You try not to let out an irritated sigh at a cafe table, it was rare to hang out in person with Treech after all. But he continued talking about Lamina, how he thinks he has a chance back with her and you just have to interrupt – “Wellllll, I guess I won’t be seeing you for a while?” 

Your question wasn’t really one, it was a statement and it was confirmed with Treech staring at you with apologetic eyes, an awkward smile on his lips. You try to smile at him but it must come out as a grimace because he is quick to make it up to you. 

“We can hang out next week?” 

Treech stopped all calls after that day. Part of you thinks it is because you made your crush on him too obvious but it can’t be since he still texted to make sure you were still down to hang out. You agreed but changed the location to the school courtyard. It would be empty at this time of the school year but still open to students that were on-campus or needed the space. 

When Treech saw you waiting for him, his face adorned a grin, jogging to reach you. He closed the distance and in a surprising move, wrapped his arms around you in a hug. It was brief but the warmth stayed and you looked up at him in question. He blushed slightly, realizing it must have been out of character for him, “It is my way of saying sorry for ditching you recently.” 

You smile at him endearingly, showing that you accept but giving him a hug of your own. He accepted gratefully wrapping his arms around you before he breaks away from you so he can make his way deeper in the school courtyard. You are receptive to his every word, offering earnest advice when you can, and really taking in today with him. Silence falls upon the two of you every now and then but it is comfortable and not overbearing. You two sit down on a high point of the courtyard, able to see the sunset from where you are and take in the scenery. 

“Hey YN,” Treech starts, “Thanks for being there.” 

It was hard for me were words that went unsaid but you heard it all the same. You shift from one palm to another, kicking up a knee and resting your arm there. 

Eyes still on the sunset that casted a golden light on both of you, you responded, “Yeah… no problem.” 

It was only after a few minutes that you started something you regret a little bit, you didn’t want him to know yet, “Treech?” He hummed in acknowledgement, turning slightly to face you. 

“Thanks for being my friend.” 

There was silence from him and you turn to finally face him, eyes sparkling, with tears or because of the sunlight you do not know. But Treech smiles and returns the statement softly and fondly. 

The rest of the week goes by as normal and everything seems to settle down in senior year. Lamina and Treech, while not back together, are still hanging out with each other everyday, like nothing has changed. If anything, things have drastically improved the two of them and they are happier than ever, although you still see a hopeful gleam in Treech’s eyes when you pass by them with brief yet pleasant exchanges. 

You had grown closer with Coral during your last year, her presence reminds you of a friend that you would be reuniting with soon enough. Her tough love evokes fond memories in you and allows you to be more open with her. 

On graduation day, Treech had been hoping to catch a glimpse of you, wanting to thank you again for raising his spirits when it felt like no one really could. His texts to you went unread and calls unanswered but he understood. Everyone was getting ready to enter the next phase of their lives and preparations had to be made. 

He didn’t have anything to worry about, at least that is what he thought until you failed to walk across the stage to grab your diploma, a tradition that he knew was important to you being the first to have a college degree in your family. He still did not allow himself to panic, he could always talk to you after graduation since he knew where you were. He did not see Coral’s eyes flicker to him and his phone at the post-graduation dinner between friends.