#if she just does background vocals I am going to roll my eyes so hard

[bookofjudith]

Taylor Swift ft Florence and the Machine…

[mskimkaty]

I AM THAT GIRL

angst, slight fluff, smut

WARNINGS: MENTIONS OF DEPRESSION, MENTAL ILLNESS, SUICIDE, SELFHARM, DRAMA, SMUT, VANILA SMUT, SWEARING, KIM JENNIE IS A BITCH HERE AND SO OTHER MENTION REAL LIFE PEOPLE BUT ITS PURELY FICTIONAL.

synopsis:Johnny Suh, the most popular boy in college, tried to take his life? what could possibly go wrong with his wealthy background, popularity, and basically having everything in the palm of his hands?

expected word count: 12,692

release date: 01/18/21 (somehow, got deleted. so Im reposting)

details: college!au, strangers to friends to lovers!au.

JohnnySuh x reader.

Johnny Suh walked the hallways in his college ground and not one passerby gives him the freedom to do his business. Students give him a look of pity, as acquaintances try to give him fake words of comfort that disgustingly crawls at the back of his skin.

They were just into the gossip, but they never really care. It was obvious from how they whisper behind his back for looking out of place and out of character, he could see their mocking gazes every time he walks past them.

he pulled his hood up and covered his old blonde hair now dyed into jet black, the usual smile plastered on his lips was now in a tight line and was placed the usually friendly demeanor with a scowl on his face.

people are staring, not in a good way, but because he looks ridiculous in their minds.

"Youngho, if you need anything, I'd gladly do it for you." Johnny heard his Korean name roll of someone's lips and now he feels disgusted with himself for the 9th time that day, he was back to zero and the acid rushes past his throat and he might vomit with the anxiety building up in the pit of his stomach upon hearing his birth name. He halts his movements and turns around to face Kim Jennie.

How does she have the nerve to say that when she cheated on him with Jongin? He treated him like a brother. Her hands travel on his biceps, the usual warmth he felt in the past now buried at the back of his memories, and now, he's just disgusted with her. He ignored her and continued walking past her, Jennie's peers were instantly beside her to console her with words of comfort because her ex-lover practically brushes her off like she was nothing.

You didn't expect a drama unfolding in front of you while standing in your locker area, Christmas break was finally over, and now students are back putting their noses in other people's business. Especially, Johnny Suh's business.

You shrugged your shoulders and walks back to your class, this is definitely a way to start your first day at this University.

Johnny sat at the far back of the room, sporting unusual dark clothing rather than the usual light colors of his wardrobe, the professor walks in, shaking his head upon seeing him at the back completely not understanding how Johnny's mind works.

Johnny knows, just by the look his professor is giving at him, he knew and have seen that twice already — he couldn't control the urge to stand up harshly making the chair he was using falls down to the ground as he walks to the door not bothering to look back, stunning everybody in the room.

When Johnny came back to school after his attempt, he felt more pulled down in the darkest pit inside him, he was unhappy more than he did when he was attempting. The funny part? when people knew about his attempt, people started flocking around him as they cared, but it was obvious. They just wanted to be with him because of his surname and money.

Even Jennie did not differ from the other students trying to impress him. The sad part about it is that he genuinely liked her, but she was just up for it because of the money and fame, and maybe the good fuck. His friends were no different, people might think that he's happy being the captain of the football team, but his life was toxic with every moment. He was in more pain than ever, his friends who were his teammates low-key discarded him thinking he's a freak saying he needed to seek attention.

Johnny knew that they weren't practically saying that to his face, but they were showing it.

They weren't wrong, he knew that, but it was different. They were all trying to impress him, worshiping the ground he walks on and now he's on the rocky side of the road, they drop him? because their parents told them to?

Johnny empties his locker, blindly shoving everything in his duffle bag when his best friend, Kim Jongin, walks inside. He hardly shoved everything inside his bag and harshly closed his locker's door, scowling at the older boy.

"Look, I'm sorry, okay?" he heard him. "This isn't you at all, why are you suddenly changing? Johnny, I already said I'm sorry." that's the ugly fact. People around him are blind enough not to notice the slight changes in him and the little signs that he wasn't mentally stable.

"This isn't an apology. You're asking me to suck it up. It's Different."

Lunch came and Johnny has nowhere to go, not with all the pity looks the student body is giving him, he had a take-out for his meal and had his lunch alone in an empty room. deciding he has no appetite to eat something, he walked out of the building and drove out to Nakamoto Yuta's basement. He's supposed to be dead two weeks before this day, but here he was, seeking for Yuta's dirty business.

"Johnny Suh." Nakamoto Yuta was known for his dirty business around campus, selling overpriced illegal transactions under the table, tattoos, and piercing. "Stop talking like I'm some god. No god would try to kill himself."

"figures."

"I don't understand, how are you still in the university and not behind bars?" Johnny asks after taking a long drag on his blunt.

"This is the only way to have food on the table, and I need to graduate. I rather do these than sell my body."

Sadly enough when Johnny checked his phone, no calls or messages from his parents. As cliche as it sounds, he wants his father to check on him but after seeing him in his room bathed in his blood on the ground, his father drifted more away from him.

When he got home that night, his family was having dinner without him, his younger sister, Yerim, ran up to him and hugged him. "Oppa, where have you been? I've been calling you." his sister was the only purest being for him, and he distances himself around her, he doesn't want him to expose her to things that only he knew.

"Yerim, go to your room." the impersonal voice of their father surrounds the dining area and Yerim flinch. looking up to his eyes before walking away.

Kim Ji hoon walks up to him and looks at him with disdain. "Stop being a disgrace, If you can't act like your invisible. I don't need a disgrace in this house." It wasn't new to Johnny anymore.

His father may not be vocal about it in the past but he knew that his father doesn't want him to breathe the same air he does, if God may allow it, he knows that his father wanted him dead, he wanted his father to acknowledged him, and he did everything, that was when Johnny was kissing up to his reputation of being the good son, ace-ing all his grades, being the captain of the football team, doing unnecessary extracurricular activities for extra points, being the good boyfriend, good friend, good son, and a good brother, but it was all too much for him, he felt that he was borrowing someone's life to the point that he doesn't recognize him anymore.

His father hated him so much that he didn't even give him his last name, and the ugly part about it is that Johnny understood his father because he was the reason his mother died. "You can't even do one thing properly, and now everyone living in this town knows about you killing yourself."

"Are you saying that I didn't properly kill myself?" he wanted to vomit. He chuckled as he ran his hands down his locks. "Go fuck yourself," he murmured and walk down to the guest room where he was temporarily sleeping, his step-mother hasn't asked the helpers to clean his room's carpet that is still bathed in his blood, he looked at his wrist that is covered in a bandage, the ugly reminder that he was unhappy and that there is no saving from this anymore. Finding the reason to wake up was hard enough and going to school was another thing, but he did anyway.

People still gossip behind his back, ugly as it sounds, people are disgustingly twisted. He smirked upon hearing he still looked hot as fuck with black hair, one student saying she would gladly do him, blonde or black.

"Jennie must have cheated knowing that he's a freak."

"hey, he might hear you, lower your voice."

"He needs to seek professional help."

"I don't understand him at all. His popular, his ex-girlfriend was fucking hot, he's rich, has great looks, and has a hella hot of a sister." something snapped inside him when he heard some asshole talked disgustingly about his sister.

Before he could even think properly, Johnny repulsively pushed the guy up to the wall. "The hell!" the stranger shouted as the other students stop to stare.

"Did you fucking talked about my sister like that?"

People are staring not because of an aggressive man pushing a full-grown body against the wall like it's nothing. it's not uncommon to see a fistfight for the entire student body to see, people are staring because, Johnny Suh, for once stunned everybody with his demeanor that is completely out of his character. Yes, he is a big guy, but he was kind, sweet, and friendly, so Johnny using force for the first time against someone was a sight to see, added to the fact that this is the first time people heard him cursing, and If eyes could kill already, the guy who talked shit about his sister is practically dead right now, he would brush it off in the past, blindly ignoring gossip about him but this is the first time that someone disrespects his sister right in front of his face and definitely, it is the first time that he gave less fuck about his reputation.

Johnny stared at the man that lacks the urge to answer him, him sending shivers down the stranger's spine. He manhandled the guy and throw him down the floor. "You had the nerve to run that filthy mouth against my sister but doesn't have the balls to answer when I'm confronting you?" he smirked and walked away.

Johnny spent the whole week going to the university but doesn't bother attending his classes, he doesn't want to be left alone at home but doesn't want to go to his classes. He just lost every motivation to do something productive.

Johnny walked his usual path these past few days, going to an empty room on the 4th floor of the Marketing's building to kill time, he gently pushed open the door and saw you changing your clothes. You were almost done, putting your white dress shirt over your shoulder without noticing that you're giving a stranger a free show.

Johnny freezes up, staring and lingering more than usual. He was mesmerized by how your skin glistens under the light slipping through the windows, but what made him stop on his track is the lack of hair you have in your body. It's just smooth skin all over your body.

When you felt someone behind you, you turn your body around to look at the intruder, you saw someone and instantly locked eyes with him. At first, you were scared of seeing Suh Johnny behind you, Johnny got a full view of your unbuttoned shirt and your chest clad in your undergarments. it's not like you saw a ghost, he didn't die per se, but then it has drawn to you, that Johnny, in the flesh, saw you changing clothes. Your reflex acts up and you turn yourself away from him, pulling your clothes to hug yourself, you fix your buttons as you run out to get out of the embarrassment.

The next day, you went to your usual spot in the library to eat your lunch when you saw somebody sitting on your chair. You shrug your shoulders and sit across the stranger who had his head tucked in his arms on the table. You were excited to eat your favorite sandwich because your mother specially made it for you, it was a rare moment given your mother raised you and your sibling alone, having to work two jobs at a time just to put food on the table and to send you to a good school. You appreciate her and love her with all your heart, she was the only one you had next to your older brother, you were good at being invisible, it was your last semester at the university. Trying to finish one subject and your practicum silently like you didn't exist at all. You laughed at the fact that you had no one in this damn hell, but you didn't care.

You started eating your sandwich in silence while opening a good book to read, you were happy in your bubble. Johnny must have heard you as you flip pages after pages. His stomach growling after registering the wonderful smell coming from his surroundings. When he lifts his head, his eyes flicked to your form, silently eating while reading a book, you were so happy in your little bubble, giggling while reading. He straightens his back and you notice the guy across you, putting a face in the stranger who sleeps across you.

A blush crept up on your face when you realize it was Johnny again, you remembered the recent events that happened between the both of you, and your embarrassed ass started coughing hard, you hold your neck rather than reaching for the bottled water in front of you as you choke none stop in front of him. He was left dumbfounded for a couple of seconds but reach for the bottle and unclasp it before handing it to you, you chugged half the contents down your throat and he watched you with fascination.

"Thank you." You said in a small voice.

You put the bottle back in its place as silence hangs in the air, it wasn't a bad kind of silence, but it was awkward. You offer him the other half of your sandwich as you watch him look at you questioningly. "Your hungry." It wasn't a question. You knew he was hungry given you kept hearing his stomach growling a while ago. "You know a little food won't hurt you right?"

Johnny laughs at your ironic statement but accepts your offer anyway, "Don't get your hopes up, I'm not up for a casual relationship." he says as you thought that he wouldn't accept your offer, given that he's rich and can buy a much better lunch than what you're currently having, but then again, you shouldn't judge a book by its cover.

"I was just offering you food."

"Thanks." When he finished your sandwich rather quickly, he went back to sleeping in front of you. He liked hearing the sound of you flipping pages after pages as you read your book silently in front of him and the occasional giggle you let out when read something funny. When he woke up to go home, you were gone, but you left your coat as you hung it around his shoulders to keep him warm.

When he came back the day after, in the library, you didn't come back.

The next morning, Johnny awoke earlier than usual, heading to his car without giving a glance at his family, Yerim saw him and was rather puzzled at the baby pink coat he was holding delicately in his arms. He drove fast to get to the university, walking inside the library to wait for you if ever you were going to be there again.

Lunch came, and your guess was right, you see the same blacked haired boy taking a nap in your usual spot with your coat right beside him. You sat across him again and started minding your business, but this time, you had another bag of sandwiches repaired for him. You weren't ignorant about Johnny's attempt, but you choose to respect his space, you knew that he wasn't mentally stable yet. He might look fine outside and you might not know what goes inside his head, but you knew that he isn't fine. No one's mentally stable, everybody has their hardships in their private lives going on right now, but the important thing is that people shouldn't use it against someone, and as long as they don't step on other people to feel better for themselves then it's good.

You might not understand what he's going through right now, you weren't friends, to begin with, but you feel for him. Sincerely.

Johnny felt peaceful for once after many years, it was an odd feeling, but it wasn't bad. You were browsing your phone, checking your emails and your mother's, clearing and archiving unimportant ones. You look at the time and it was already half past lunchtime. Wednesday is a pain in the ass for you, you have to wait for 5 hours until your next class in the afternoon. You didn't notice Johnny waking from his nap, seeing as you still haven't touched the sandwich bags in front of you, he's guessing you still haven't eaten.

"I'm Johnny."

You look at the man in front of you, his usual strawberry locks are now turned into black, sporting a gray hoodie over his black shirt and matching gray track pants. You study his expression, his not extending his hands for a handshake nor his face valid of any emotion, yet you smile and said "What happened to not being in a casual relationship?"

Johnny was taken back, you give him the sweetest smile you could offer and handed him the extra sandwich you had, "You know, some people would reply with their names." he said as he accepts the food that you offered, you look at him as if contemplating before speaking.

"Y/n"

"I'm not sure, but what department are you from?" he asked after taking a bite of his food. "This is good, by the way. Who made this?"

"What question do you want me to answer first?" you asked laughing. "My mom made it, and I'm from the same department as you, Though, I just transferred to this school after the Holidays,

If he was shocked he didn't show it, Johnny nods his head as if acknowledging you, "I just want time to pass by quickly and silently, that's why no one knows I exist here. I'm just trying to live another day until I graduate." You said making Johnny fall silent.

"Good for you," he replied after a good minute with the both of you munching on your foods. "Was it hard?" he asked.

"What is?"

"You don't seem to have anyone, do you even have friends?" you laughed at his statement because it was the truth. "Yeah, something like that. It wasn't that bad I might have no friends because I choose not to have any relationships with anybody in here."

"That sucks, I'm not going to ask the reason why you transferred in the middle of the semester because that's your business, not mine," he says, you study his face and you weren't sure whether to run your mouth over his business or not, deciding against it you stood up and take your things with you. "Let me show you something."

Walking down the stairs while both of you kept a little distance, you lead him to the visual room, pulling the keys in your backpack and unlocking it. "Why do you have a key to the AVR?" he asks bewildered.

"Perks of being the teacher's pet," you replied as you pulled him inside, turning the computer and projector on, you played a video about constellations and aimed the projector above.

Stars hover above the two of you and you urge him to lay down beside you, looking up and taking a moment of peace to embrace both of you.

"When things get hard and I tend to be alone; let's be honest, no one wants to feel lonely, especially at the hardest times of our lives. But then, you can't force someone to be there with you physically and emotionally and it sucks to have yourself suck it up for being alone. So, I do this, I take my time staring at these constellations. You see, they're really beautiful to me. I find them fascinating, they have this beautiful meaning behind them, it was always fun finding their patterns, connecting them until they're complete, you just have to look closely, in that way, you'll appreciate them more." you smile while pointing above you, he might not look at you but your presence beside him does him wonders, it was so powerful that even if he closes his eyes, he still feels you beside him. The warmth he was feeling coming from you, your steady breathing, and your sweet scent.

You spent your Mondays and Wednesdays with Johnny, eating lunch together, or spending time as you watch different constellations every week.

Friday morning, you made a quick detour to your department before clocking in for your practicum, before leaving the premises a professor asked you for a favor and you agreed to make a copy of the files she was asking for. When you came back from the printing room, you saw a commotion ahead. It wasn't you to pry on other people's business, but your legs must have their mind when you saw a familiar tall build that is clad in a black hoodie.

Johnny Suh stands in the middle with Kim Jongin and Kim Jennie on the other side. He was hyperventilating.

"Just leave, please." Kim Jongin shouted at him, you can see the obvious horror written on everyone's faces. Kim Jennie was stuck beside Jongin as she shed tears silently, disbelief written in Johnny's face.

"Do you know what went wrong? it's because you were never enough." Jennie drops the bomb for everyone to hear, Johnny was livid. If he could crush everything that he could see he would take the chance and do it. If he could take his life again, he wouldn't give a single fuck and he'll gladly do it.

"I can't believe you both. I wasn't the one who cheated with my best friend, why the fuck do you act like it's my fault?" you heard Johnny said and for the first time your heart broke for him.

You found him in your usual spot in the library, his head hanging low and his body shaking as he tries to catch his breath. You drop your coat over his head and give him the bottle of water you were holding, instead of sitting across him, you sat next to him without overstepping and respecting his space to cool down.

When he started to calm down, he handed your coat back to you, stood up, and left the library. Saying you were dumbfounded was an understatement but you choose to understand him.

Days passed by and Johnny was still a no show. When a week has already passed without seeing Johnny, you started to get worried. You wished you asked for his number, but then again, you weren't even that close, to begin with. You decide to spend your long-vacant in the visual room, playing random constellations as you think about a certain boy.

When that certain boy suddenly appeared right in front of you. "I'm sorry." He had his hands inside his grey sweatpants.

"What matters is that you came."

Johnny joined you on the floor, staring up at the ceiling, after a moment of silence, he spoke up. "Why did you help me? why do you even care about me at all? I'm a mess."

"Aren't we friends?" You asked even though it was clear that he turned your offer of friendship down a while ago.

"What you said about the constellations earlier made me realize how I took myself for granted and at the same time how ungrateful I am."

You look at him and give him the chance to speak up. "I didn't have the will to live, do you know that you are annoyingly optimistic about everything?" He jokingly asked, and you laughed with him.

"Is that a compliment or what?"

"I still don't have a reason to be here." He suddenly says. Johnny looks at your face as if reading you, he was prepared to see you pitying him but there was none.

"You don't have to look for it. You have yourself because, at the end of the day, you only got your own back," you turn to him as you give him a look. Johnny envied you, it was obvious, and you can read him like an open book. "Don't, don't look at me like that, Johnny Suh." the way his name rolled down your tongue felt flawless, as if you were born to say his name out loud.

"We all have our shortcomings, I'm not perfect nor are people around me, no one is, and we have to accept that fact, give less care about people who can't accept that."

"It's not as easy as it seems," Johnny says, your hand brushing back the stray hair that falls on his forehead as if your hand has a mind of its own. "Sorry-"

"It's fine. I like it." Both of you turn towards the ceiling as you continue to watch the stars, keeping the comfortable silence and just hang around each other.

For weeks, spending time in the library and the visual room to watch the stars has been your thing with Johnny Suh, you couldn't even imagine being friends with the likes of him, you view him as a constellation star, he's mysterious behind his disguise as he tends to fool everyone with, he was hard to reach and was always up above you, he brightens the surroundings like how the stars brighten the night sky, for you, he was more than the famous campus boy that everybody likes, even if he can't realize that.

Weeks passed by and you look forward to your Mondays and Wednesdays than the fact that you are graduating.

You were busy transferring your books to your backpack as you stand in front of your locker when Johnny came to you. "I didn't know we have the same classes."

You were stunned when you saw him talking to you in the open, students started looking in your way as if seeing a history. The most known guy in the University is with a nobody, but you shrugged it anyway as you closed your locker's door. You bite back at your tongue with all the attention you were getting, anxiety creeping out to you but you choose to ignore it.

"You weren't even attending your classes," you told him as you fix your backpack, the both of you started walking, keeping the same slow pace and taking your time.

"Well, I now have a reason, at least," he says as he grabs the strap of your bag and slings it in his shoulder. You ignore the bubbly feeling inside you and continued walking. Smiling at yourself as you forget about the stares around you.

"You're so cheesy, Suh Johnny." You giggled at him and for the first time, you saw a genuine smile creeping on his face.

When Lunch came, both of you sat outside to enjoy the sunny weather. "I'm going to start my Practicum next week," Johnny told you suddenly, and you stood up so fast to walk around the table to hug him.

"I'm so glad!" the sincere happiness is written on your face that even Johnny laughs with you.

"Thanks to you, I feel like, there's more to it than ending my life at the age of 21," he says and you shake your head at him.

"No, I didn't do anything. It's mostly you. I'm just here beside you to guide you, but it's your own will."

"I'll be honest with you, hurting myself still runs on my head but the difference this time is, I'm scared to do it." you didn't know what to reply to that so you just extend your hands towards his and hold it firmly in your grasp.

The rest of your day went ahead without you noticing, time flies by rather quickly when you are with Johnny. You stood waiting for your bus to arrive when a black Audi stops in front of you. Its windows rolling down and you see Johnny peeking through the window to smile at you.

"You want to wait for your bus or be logical and save time?" you laugh at his way of asking you for a ride but walk towards the passenger to join him in his car otherwise. The car ride was rather chaotic, you were debating about what to put first, milk or cereal, and you felt the horrors when Johnny says he puts milk in first. He was laughing like a child at how horrified you look.

"Anything's fine with me. I put whatever in first," he says after a long minute of arguing.

"I'm telling you, not to live like that!" you argue back. "Cereal comes first and then milk goes in, just imagine, do you pour the soap first before the water? it's water before the soap!" you explained and he laughs at how rilled up you get.

The argument was cut off when you arrived at your house. Johnny parked his car in front of your house and for some reason, your mother came in wearing an apron over her clothes. She raises an eyebrow at the unknown car blocking her driveway and you look at Johnny who looks back at you.

"Your mother is intimidating." He says.

"Want to come over for dinner?" you ask, and It took him a second before responding, " You think that's a good idea?"

"Come on, Mr. Suh, grow some balls, it's just my mom." Johnny looks offended at your statement.

"I have balls that girls flock around with," he retorted. You sigh and open the passenger seat greeting your mom with a smile as you ran to hug her.

"Can my friend stay for dinner?" you asked after hugging her. Johnny is behind you as he introduced himself as your friend and your mother shocked him by giving him a warm hug.

"There's still room for another boy in my house, I believe, it's no problem." Your mother stated as Johnny gives you a confused glance. Your mother invited him in and you welcomed him.

Inside, your older brother, Taeil is strumming his guitar with three other guys in the living room. "Oh, This is my Brother, Taeil." you casually said at him as you hung both of your jackets.

"You didn't tell me you have a brother." He whispered at you, standing awkwardly beside you. Taeil waved at him and you push him to sit beside Jaehyun.

"This is Jaehyun, Doyoung, and Ten. They're all bandmates during high school so they're always here for my brother," you explained. "And your mother's cooking." Ten added.

"Well, now you know," You said as you turn to him. "Let me just go to my room and freshen up real quick, just make yourself feel at home," you say as you back up on your track. "Cool."

Johnny didn't feel out of place for some reason, he was really happy that he got to meet your brother and his bandmates, they were cool to be around. They entertained him and ask what were his hobbies are and for the first time, he took his time to think about what he likes to do. He likes to draw.

When dinner was served, all the boys helped your mother to set up the table, Johnny was persistent in helping even after telling him to sit and wait because he was a guest. You let him help otherwise.

Dinner was well spent, he enjoyed talking with everyone and your mother even asks him to visit anytime he wants. Taeil takes a liking to him, asking him to hang out whenever he's free. Johnny presented to do the dishes and you helped him when he was done his shirt was a total mess because of the water splashing through the faucet, a good thing is that your brother has some clothes that are way oversized for him, and he lets Johnny use them.

You handed him the shirt, accidentally seeing a huge bruise on his chest and stomach, before you knew it, you stop him as he was about to put his shirt on. "What happened?"

His bruises must have slipped his mind and he mentally cursed himself at it. You were horrified. "Johnny, are you getting beat up?"

"I don't want to talk about this," he pulled his shirt down "Y/n, It's getting late. I should head home now. Thank you for dinner, I enjoyed it." and before you know it, Suh Johnny was gone.

Weeks passed by and Johnny was a complete no show. Faint rays of the sun trickled down through your curtains and fell on your room's marbled floor, you look up at your window and were blinded by the light, sitting up, you let your feet hovered on your marbled floors and mentally prepare yourself for the day.

In the office, your instructor asked you to copy some files and you gladly agreed to do it as you don't have much going on for the time being. You thought that it was hard doing your practicum, but all you did at the office was run errands evolving the x-ray machine. Your mind drifted back to Johnny, you'll have to talk to him. Being worried about him is already killing you and the last time you saw him was three weeks ago.

Wednesday came and you sat at your usual spot in the library, studying for the upcoming exams as you patiently wait for the tall black-haired guy. You forced yourself to do some actual studying but for some reason, all you can think about was Suh Johnny who didn't even show up.

The week passed by in a blur and on Thursday you went to your University to take the exam, you were scheduled for the second batch, and instead of your usual schedule of Wednesday, your professor divided your class into two batches.

You weren't even aware that your exams already finished as you were walking to your locker to put away some books.

You understood that Johnny had issues and you hated that you can't do anything to help him. You would do anything for him if that means for the comfort inside him and his peace of mind. You might not know the reason for his depression but everyone has a reason and you know that everybody around you has some issues going on in their private lives. You look around, seeing other students do their thing, minding their own business, some are even bored and waiting for their exams, You saw Jennie and Jongin together looking at you with disgusted faces that you shrugged off.

Johnny saw you as you mindlessly walk your way to the visual room, and he followed behind you silently, as he looks over his ex-girlfriend and ex-best friend. He realized he never really had a connection with Jennie before, they were both just into the sex, and then it gets awkward when they started to talk.

You were already done setting the projector up, walking in the center to lay down when you heard someone entered, and when you saw Johnny at the entrance of the room, his hands on his sweatpants pocket as he gives you a look, you stood up and ran to give him a big hug. You shed tears for him, as you give him a tight hug.

"Why are you crying?" he asked.

"Aren't we friends?" You asked him as you hold him in your arms. "Friends share their pains. So, I'll be here. I just want you to know that I'll be here when you needed someone to be there with you." Johnny fought his tears but who was he kidding? He yearns for someone's affection and not because of who he was but because it was him. And this time, he finally had someone to share his pains with. People already viewed him as someone going on a phase, probably someone rebelling against his parents but Johnny was more than that. He didn't care about it, though. He learned to give less fuck about insignificant people around him.

"My father used to beat me up, Football was just an excuse to cover up these bruises." He admitted. He was disgusted and embarrassed about it. But it was you, and he knows that you're not one to judge someone based off on their appearances.

You shed more tears for him. "Johnny, You don't deserve that, no one deserves that," you say caressing his cheeks. You hated the cheesy statement but you ignore it anyway, what you were feeling at the moment isn't important. Johnny was opening up to you.

The two of you manage to have time off from the university and Practicum. (Johnny started his practicum last, last week, that's why he was MIA most of the time, that time.) Johnny was hanging out at your house, the problem was, your mother and brother are both at work, so you take it to yourself that being alone with him, at your house, is inappropriate. You drag him outside, leading the way to one of your favorite diners.

"I am telling you, you're going to regret that," you said.

"What's wrong with what I ordered?" Johnny did this little thing in his nose, and you take a moment to look at him as you smile at him. You ignore the stares around you, feeling like a sore thumb sticking and obviously, out of place. Johnny scowl at the man who was drunk out of his wits, shamelessly checking you out. This wasn't the first time, this always happened, but not to you though. You told him to ignore it, that man was probably in here to order a cup of coffee.

"Their chicken and waffles here are the best! I'm telling you, I'm not going to share with you."

One pout of his lips towards you and you were switching your plates towards Johnny. You told him, only because this was the first time that he got to try out your favorite dish, and there won't be a second chance in the future. Johnny was kind enough to share a piece of waffle with you. But not the chicken, though. He fell head over heels for it.

Bit by bit, Johnny's walls crumbled down around you, and before you knew it, both of you are inseparable. Johnny dating you spread like wildfire around campus, but there wasn't any truth behind that gossip, you were just a friend. Simple as that.

He was hanging more lately with your brother than you expected. Both of them have the same interest, so it wasn't a surprise when Johnny befriended most of your brother's friends.

Johnny was going on about how Jaehyun's a chill guy, Mark, and Donghyuck introducing him to play games, even Yuta, the University's drug dealer, as they brand him, was included in Taeil's group of friends.

"You didn't tell me that you knew Nakamoto Yuta," Johnny whispered behind you.

"Yeah, For some reason, I didn't want to get involved with most of them. Some girls are crazy about them and I just want peacefulness as I end my college years." You answered. Yuta was from the same department, Jaehyun was from the same university but was taking a different course, as well as Doyounga and Taeyong. Mark and Haechan still need a year before attending college. Ten was studying arts and your brother was a college dropout.

You were having pizza night at your house, your mother was kind enough to accommodate a bunch of men in her tiny house, seemingly impossible to fit 13 men inside, but it did. Instead of the usual party that frat houses and rich kids throw around, Taeil and the others like to keep it to themselves. Sharing one shot glass and downing a cheap rum as everybody waits for their turn. Most of them didn't think that Johnny would be fine with this kind of setup. Besides, he was branded as the campus king and a rich heir at that. He could spend Friday nights at some high-end bar and drink expensive alcohol. But no, instead, here he was, sitting on the cheap carpet your mother owns with a bunch of drunk men but you were glad that your brother is such a nice guy and so are his peers.

Johnny was glad, that he found true people, who accepts him for who he is and not because of who he was.

Doyoung placed you on the empty sofa, you have a low tolerance for alcohol, and you can't keep up with them anymore. The cheapest drink Taeyong bought isn't of cheap quality, you knew better than to judge a bottle chosen by him. You watch them with heavy eyelids, smiling at yourself, Mark and Donghyuck made fun of you by putting thick blankets around you and this was the first time Johnny saw you annoyed by the younger boys.

When Morning came, you were already on your bed as your head pounds. When you came downstairs to leave for school you look around and saw that last night's trace was gone as if 13 grown men didn't make a mess out of your mother's living room.

You wished you had gotten a coffee first when you entered your room way too early and saw that most of the students are yet to arrive, even water would be good, anything liquid down your throat would be good.

You saw Jaehyun and Johnny bidding farewells at the front of the room, students who were present to see the two interacting were shocked, for them, It was rare to see Johnny without his usual crew. But, who are they to decide that for Johnny? It was a rare sight to see, A popular music major and the famous ex-football captain, together?

When Johnny approached his spot beside you, he gives you the cold Iced latte he was holding fresh from Starbucks, completely ignoring unwanted stares behind his back.

"Good Morning," there was a warm aura surrounding him as he settled down beside you, and you look at him in awe. "What?" he asks.

You watched him for a moment, smiling at him as he looks at you questionably. "You're happy," you stated making Johnny pause for a second to think, he was sporting a baby pink hoodie and grey Nike pants, holding his Earpods and Macbook at the other hand. "I think I might be getting there."

Your heart swells up for him and as you fought back the tears that wanted to fall. Johnny reached out to you, wiping the strands of hair that keep falling on your face. "Sorry," you said. People might think that yesterday, Johnny was trying to end his life, and then suddenly, he was okay, because he never was, and you continuously walk on a thin thread around him, Johnny is like a ticking bomb and porcelain that needs to be handled with the utmost care. Five months ago, Johnny doesn't have the motivation to continue living his life, but here he was thriving to know what tomorrow can offer him.

For Johnny, meeting you was his saving grace, problems might fill up in his life, there is this constant reminder that society will always judge him the minute he does something wrong, there is his father, his stepmother who doesn't really pay attention to him, his old life and old self constantly reminding him the pain of the past.

"What happened to your eyes?" there were dark circles under his eyes and for a moment you thought that he has a lot in his mind to think about for the lack of sleep.

"I stayed up till dawn playing overwatch with Donghyuck and Mark last night." He says smiling.

"I'm glad your settling with the boys all right." Johnny watched you, how your long hair flow past your shoulders through your back, he loves the little freckles dancing all over your cheeks naturally and how a touch of pink creeps in your cheeks naturally because of the humid air.

You were really glad. "Do you want to go with me and Ten?" He asks you when your classes ended for the morning, both of you walked to the library to hide from prying and malicious eyes. "He wants to hang out in the nearest coffee shop." he continued and you agreed to go with him, making a turn for the exit.

Johnny ordered an Americano for him and a latte for you, eating the packed lunch your mother made for you and Johnny as you wait for Ten.

Ten arrived with Jaehyun in tow, placing their bags down Jaehyun took the seat beside you while Ten walked to the counter to order their drinks. Johnny looked at you and Jaehyun but ignore the malice running in his head.

"Kim Yerim!" the three of you looked at the entrance to see Johnny's sister entering the cafe, Yerim waved at someone across their table and saw his sister's friend Park Sooyoung waving frantically. Johnny turned to look at you and Jaehyun ignoring his sister who started walking inside, "What happened to you?" he asks Jaehyun,

"Why?"

"You're turning really red." Johnny pointed out and you snickered at Jaehyun who turns to look at Johnny's sister absentmindedly. "Man, That's my sister!" Johnny whispered-shout at him as he fought the urge to laugh at Jaehyun. Someone definitely has a crush on his little sister.

You and Johnny eyed each other, laughing as you both understood telepathically. "What's so funny?" Ten asks when he arrived and the both of you laughed loudly this time.

"Hyung!" Jaehyun shouted at him his ears turning red.

When Johnny got home, he locked himself up in his room that his step-mother finally asked to clean. He was busy waiting for Donghyuck and Mark to play when he heard a knock on his door.

"Can I come in?" His step-mother asked. Yerim's mother is a great person, but that doesn't really mean that she's a good mother to both him and Yerim, he can't really judge her though, she's still young and living her dreams but then his father got her pregnant with Yerim and then here she is stuck at this hell of a household, all three of them under the strings of his father.

"Yes." He says.

Kim Ah-Jong walked inside, placing a warm cup of milk beside him for the first time, "Johnny," She started as he settled at the edge of Johnny's bed facing him. Johnny turns his chair to face her too, holding the warm mug in his hand to seek comfort in this awkward setting.

"I don't know how to start, but I just wanted to say that I'm really sorry," she paused for a second, ignoring the lump in her throat, "I hope you forgive me for replacing your mother's position, and that I'm really grateful because you love your sister more than anything even though you didn't have the same mother."

"It's the least that I could do." He says.

"Yes, I know, and I'm sorry if I failed you as a mother, I was busy finding myself to the point you and Yerim grow up without the right amount of affection from us. We're such horrible parents and I wanted to say sorry on behalf of your father. You don't deserve this, no one else did."

That night, Johnny slept soundly in his own home for the first time in a while.

Yerim was shocked to see her mom attending to his brother, it's as if she suddenly had a change of heart and finally started to be a mother to his brother. Her father was another problem, he still hasn't moved on from his son's attempt. Spitting atrocious words early in the morning making Johnny regret even joining the breakfast.

Kim Ah-jong had enough of his husband's wrath, it was still morning and his husband is starting to get on her nerves. She stabs her bread knife on their table as she turns her head towards him, "Is still early in the morning for the love of God, Kim Ji Hoon. Must you really ruin our morning?" she says.

Both Yerim and Johnny were stunned at her, their father shutting up in instant at the fear her wife would stab her.

Johnny and Yerim drive to the University that day together, "Oh, do you mind if we stop by at my friend's house? I promise to pick him up." Johnny asks and Yerim nodded.

Johnny smirked, he was excited to see Jaehyun's reaction.

Johnny pulled up in front of Jaehyun's apartment, sending him a message the was up in front of his building, after a minute, Jaehyun emerges from the entrance of the building running to get to his car with a tumbler in his other hand.

Johnny pulled the window down and Jaehyun saw Yerim first, he stopped midway, flustered that a girl was with his young, and It was no other than his sister. he played it cool and sat at the back.

"Oh, Yerim-ah, this is Jaehyun. He's my friend."

Jaehyun didn't expect her to turn around and bow her head down. "Thank you so much for taking good care of my brother."

Johnny became flustered with Yerim but laughed it off instead. Jaehyun bowed his head towards her saying it was nothing. Yerim was unaware of the looks she was getting from the older boy sitting at the back seat of his brother's car as Johnny keeps throwing playful glances at the back while he drove them to the school.

Graduation was already nearing, both you and Johnny were already finished with your practicum, Johnny was moving boxes towards his car, for some reason, his father allowed him to have his own flat, his step-mother saying that it would be the best for him and his mental health to have some space between them and that they should give him some time and space. His father was adamant at first but has nothing to do in the end.

"Just let him do what he wants, He's already graduating, with honors! He already did everything you wanted it's the least you could do for him." he heard his step-mother argue a while ago with his father. Johnny still had to go home every Sunday at the main house, though.

You and Taeil volunteered to help him with his moving and he was glad, to say the least. Yerim contacted you to do his groceries for him and the two of you left the older boys as you went to the market with Yerim.

Yerim was a cool young woman, she was matured for her own age, you learned that she was very frank at what she wants and that she loves her brother so much.

"I'm really glad my brother meet you," she says as she links her right arms with you, you were both walking to the parking lot, and you smiled at her blushing.

"Honestly, I never really liked his old friends. Jongin? Nope. Chanyeol? He's an asshole. Everyone in that damn team is an ass except for Sehun," she says as both of you entered the market, pulling a big cart in the process, and continued walking ahead. "You and your brother are surrounded by good people. Do you know that? And I'm kind of jealous of you, not that I don't have good friends, I do."

"Well, consider me someone you can be with so those good people will surround you too," you said smiling, Yerim giggled at you.

It took Johnny a week before really settling down in his apartment, he invited the guys over to have a small welcoming party, drinking and playing till the sun rises.

Johnny was busy typing at his laptop as you were both doing your last requirement for college, papers, and documents were all scattered around his living room when he turns his head to look at you. "Are you comfortable with those jeans?" He asks.

You look at your pants, it is uncomfortable.

"I don't have extra clothes," Johnny poked at his cheeks with his tongue, he stood up and went inside his room, when he came back he was holding clean boxer shorts. "You can use this if you want," he says as he extends his arms to you. You gladly took it and went to his bathroom to change.

Johnny thinks this was more dangerous than when he had blood oozing out of his wrist, you had your toned legs on display for him, and only him. It wasn't helping at all. Without knowing, he stared at your legs for a good minute, the urge of having his hands run along the lines of your thighs was becoming unbearable. He was amazed by the lack of hair you had around your arms and legs, was it liked that too with the parts your clothes have covered? He can't help the wild imaginations running around his head with the things he wants to do to you.

Johnny focused his attention back on the screen of his laptop. What the fuck is he even thinking? It's you, his fucking angel. How dare he have dirty thoughts about you. He mentally slaps himself and went back to typing.

You noticed Johnny having a mental crisis because of you and you silently laugh at him, extending your legs further to have your skin touch his thighs.

after hours of being productive with your work, You and Johnny decided to call it a night.

After a week of preparations for the upcoming finals, you and Johnny decided to meet up, the waiter placed both of your orders in front of you and Johnny, who give the waiter a small smile while uttering a quick "Thank you." You eyed Jhonny's food who looks somewhat more delicious than your Pesto Pasta. You don't even know why you ordered it, you never even tasted it before, you just want to— maybe, impress the guy in front of your table who were giving you obvious looks about the taste pallet you had which is definitely of a 13 Years old.

Johnny gives you a look while shaking his head, knowing all too well that you wanted a bite of it. Looking at you who's eyeing his barbeque bacon burger with fries on the side— It's usually what the two of you order and he was shocked that you ordered something out of the ordinary. He knew that you weren't the type of girl to go out of your comfort zone. You like what you usually eat, what you usually drink, and what type of clothing you usually wear. You are a very simple, young woman. You don't usually try things out of the blue, especially, when the two of you are both hungry.

Instantly, Johnny switched both plates. Giving you his food whilst saying a silent goodbye to the famous BBQ burger that he craves so much after winning a football game, which, he deserves. "What are you doing?" you asked shocked. You already saw him digging in and wincing at the taste. "Why the fuck would you even order this thing?" he asked.

You looked at the guy at the other table. You both were giving silent glances, he's good-looking and obviously from another school but you don't do other schools, that is the thing, you'd rather date someone from the same school, same department or same village. You don't like the hassle. People can go ahead and say your such a basic bitch, which in fact, you are. You finally give your full attention to Johnny who looks at his back to find some guy obviously ogling your face. That was the scariest thing in the world for him, guys ogling your face rather than your body, honestly, it was obvious from guys falling for your body— they just want to get in your pants, but guys who fall for your beauty is different.

You start digging in with your food. "This is the reason why I love you so much." You stated giving your burger a bite.

"Why would you even want to eat this." He says. You give him a chuckle as you extend your right arm towards him, offering him a bite of your burger, which he gladly took. "I'm sorry, I'm such a pain in the ass." You said.

"I kidnapped you in your after party and I'm so sorry, I didn't know Jennie's going to be there, and now you're eating something you don't even like. Man, you don't deserve this." You continued. Sincerely saying sorry towards him— picking a fry and dipping it on the ketchup provided at the side of your plate.

For some reason, Things work out for him and the team, It was going to be his last year playing, and the higher-ups decided for him to lead the team again, making Jongin lose face around the campus. It wasn't like before, It was expected, Johnny was just professional around them, leading them at the court and out of sight, after.

"What? No way. This is what I deserve. A peaceful dinner and finally having time with you." He says after biting at the toasted bread the pasta has. It was true though, Johnny was talking with Jennie again, well, but not exactly dating her, as students would say around campus. They dated, but that was that, he can't even imagine being good friends with someone who cheated on him, he was just being civil with her, ending things with a good note and leaving the better past behind him, and you haven't really had the chance to hang out together since their coach intensified their training hours and days, and right after that Johnny would hang out with your brother and the other guys.

"What did my brother say, though? with you being with me tonight? You guys are basically dating each other by now," you joked.

"Yeah, he's cool with it. Don't worry, I told him about our meeting before you actually kidnapped me." He gives you a smirk and you give him a confused look. "I was actually going to ask you for a dinner with me after the game." You rolled your eyes at him.

"Wow." You commented. You were practically like a twin at this rate. "Can I ask you something, though?" Johnny didn't know whether to ask because he was curious or just wait for you to open up to him, for some reason, Johnny felt naked around you. You knew everything about him, you have him wrapped around your pretty little fingers "What if I don't want to?" You countered and he scoffed.

"What was the reason you transferred? you only had a year to finish before graduating," Your face fell and he instantly saw how your face contorted into a frown. "Why are you making that face?" he asked.

"I had a bad break up to the point that I was destroying myself." You finally said like it was nothing. Johnny stopped everything that he's doing, giving you a look as if asking why. He felt like an idiot. How can he? at your worst time? "I'm such a horrible friend." He says.

"It's not your fault, and I'm even sorry that I didn't tell you sooner." You said quietly. Suddenly your favorite dish from the dinner doesn't look appealing anymore. "And I wanted time for myself, you know, he cheated on me."

the clicking of utensils can be heard throughout the diner when he dropped them to the table. He was fuming mad.

"It wasn't anyone's fault, though. if anything. It was mine. I lost interest in our relationship, didn't have time for him, and just lost everything along the way." You said while moving your plate towards him which he gladly took, abandoning the pasta you ordered and eating the half of the burger you had. But the real reason was, you can't stop comparing your ex-boyfriend to him.

"Still isn't a reason to cheat on you." He says after taking a bite. You move your lemonade in front of you and lazily sip on it. He drops the topic knowing all too well that you don't want to talk about it. Still, he felt guilty for some reason, What could go wrong?

Right, Johnny Suh is starting to have feelings for you, and definitely not in a platonic way.

And you don't have any idea about it.

He opened your bag that was beside him and fetch the wet wipes that were inside. He opened it and out of habit cleaned your fingers with it. And you let him, smiling. "I wished I meet you sooner," He looked at you and smiled. "I'm really sorry I haven't been with you for the last 21 years." you joked as you let him dry your fingers with a dry napkin that the diner provides.

You were about to head out— fetching the car keys that you placed on the bowl beside the main door when you hear a familiar honk outside your house. Your hands slip past your keys and you walk the small distance to your door, opening it the cold air of December heats your face and Johnny greeted you with his usual beam on his face, his left hand stretched up outside his window, giving you a wave.

You smiled to yourself, biding your mom a quick goodbye and you were off to school with your best friend.

"Good Morning." He greeted you when you opened the door of his black Audi.

"Good Morning, indeed." You said facing him after securing yourself with the seat belt. There was a tint of pink in Johnny's checks that you choose to ignore.

Pulling up at the parking lot in front of the university's main building where a lot of students lingered chatting with their circle of friends— Johnny smoothly maneuvered and parked at his usual spot.

You both get out of his car and started to walk to the building.

"See you at lunch?" he asked when you neared your classroom— you were slightly shocked. "Won't you be eating with Yerim today?" you asked as you stopped in your tracks facing him. "Doesn't have to." He simply replied and you nod your head. "She'll be mad, John." You said as a matter of fact— facing him while slowly backing away as he marly give you a shrug. "She doesn't have the right, though." you rolled your eyes at him "Just ask her to eat with us!"

Graduation was nearing and you've been offered a job at one of the top companies in the city, you didn't have the reason to turn them down so you accept and were set to sign the contract right after having your diploma.

This calls for a celebration, though.

When Johnny heard that he was the first one to know about something significant in his life, he was delighted.

You found yourself getting tipsy with the cheap booze in front of you and Johnny. You were laughing at something he said about his sister, holding the cheap beer in your hand as you chug the contents down your through. "Okay, That's enough," Johnny said whilst grabbing the cans of beer and putting them back at his refrigerator. You pout back at him but don't argue, you still have to attend your classes tomorrow morning and you don't want to miss anything for the last weeks you have for being a college student.

Johnny tucked you in his bed and you bid the sweetest goodnight on him, he leaves a sweet kiss on your forehead before heading for the couch in the living room to sleep on, since he had no energy to actually drive you home.

You woke up that night, feeling rather hot, unconsciously stripping out of your pants and bra out of habit, you walked to the kitchen for some water.

Walking with blurred vision, you find your way into the kitchen. The lights were dim as you passed by the living room completely ignoring the fact that Johnny could definitely walk on you wearing only your white tee and undies.

You helped yourself around the kitchen, rummaging in the refrigerator for a jar of water, your hands felt the cold lid of the jar, popping it open and chugging the contents down. You giggled after realizing that you should probably use glass and act like a lady for once since you're not in your own place.

You hissed as you struggle, reaching for a glass in the cupboard. "Just why is it placed so fucking high?" you asked yourself. A hand reached for the glass and you turned around, shocked and ready to pounce the person behind you.

you came face to face with Johnny. His face, only inches away from you. His hands find their way to your waist as he looked at you and the glass in his hands, he purred his self some water in the glass and chugged the whole content down.

"I got thirsty," he said. You moved beside so you don't disturb him, stepping at least five steps away.

He looked you up and down, the smell of booze around, is strong, it almost made you gag. Feeling the cold air between your legs, you looked at yourself. "Fuck." realizing that you were only wearing your white t-shirt; that you probably owned since 7th grade— Your breast was obvious that even your nipples were prominent, your shirt just hanging before your hip bone and then your undies.

You mentally slap yourself. He put the glass down and you put your hair in front to at least cover your hardening nipples away from him. Chills run down your spine as he took another step forward, clearing the distance between you.

"Hey-" he cut you off.

"Johnny," he says.

"What?" you asked, barely whispering. Your eyes moved down on their own, from his eyes down to his upper body, he was shirtless, giving you free access to his perfectly sculpted body, his pelvis, so sharp even a God couldn't compare. Again, you felt the burning sensation coming back in your throat. You touched your neck instantly as you tried to swallow.

"My name, say it," he whispered, you looked up only to be met by his eyes, dark with unknown lust as if burning you within. He keeps staring at you, keeping you captive with his eyes that you somehow felt naked.

"Johnny," you whispered trying not to sound like your practically moaning his name. He took a step forward, leaving no space between you and him. "Again." He commands you. You sucked a deep breath as you avoid eye contact.

"Johnny."

He used his index finger to lift your head as his thumb drew circles just below your chin to the base of your neck. blood rushed to your face as you suddenly felt hot on your cheeks as he put his hands on your waist again. He tilts his head, the smell of alcohol mixed with his aftershave and mint filled your senses, suddenly it wasn't too dark anymore.

He brushes his lower lip against yours that you barely felt it. He licked his lower lip as you bite yours. He stares intently at you. "You know, I would appreciate it if you don't walk around the house in these." his hands hot on your skin.

all rationality seems to fly out of the window, both of you staring at each other gazes, Johnny pulling you in for a much deeper kiss. "Didn't know you were this naughty with alcohol in your system," he murmured, Johnny's soft languid kisses were driving you wild, he moves at the base of your neck and sucked at the soft skin before pressing light kisses.

"Do you have any idea how much I want you?" he says softly, your breath hitches without knowing and you deliciously clenched around nothing upon hearing his statement, you were hypnotized by his eyes. Leaning down, he kisses you again.

You put your hands around his chest to push him slightly, gazing up toward him, "I want this," you whispered. "No. Not in the morning when you're sober enough to regret this," Johnny says, you ignore him and pulled him down to kiss him again, and Johnny lost all his logic with how delicious you tasted, you guide his hands on the hem of your shirt and slowly he peels it off for you and lets it fall down the floor.

Johnny put his arms around you and hauls you against his body, squeezing you tightly, his hands traveled down your waist and down to your behind, he holds you against his hips, and you feel his erection, which he gladly pushes into you, easily lifting you from the floor after, you moan once more in his mouth, He eases you towards the bed and you feel your back against the soft cushion once more.

Tentatively, you move your hands up to his face and his hair, tugging at it lightly as if implying for him to take you fully. But Johnny has other plans in his mind. He grabs your hips with both his hands and runs his tongue around your navel, gently nipping his way to your hipbone and across your belly to the other.  "Ah," You groan.

Seeing him on top of you, between your legs as you feel his hot breath against your skin, Is unexpected, but you wanted this as much as he wants it. Your hand on his hair, pulling gently as you try to quiet your loud breathing. He gazes up at you through impossibly long-lashed, and chocolate-colored eyes. His hand reaches the hem of your black underwear, leisurely pulling it down without taking his eyes off you, he stops and licks his lips, never breaking eye contact. Johnny leans forward, running his nose up the apex between your thighs, and you feel him.

"You smell so fucking good," he murmurs and closes his eyes. a look of pure pleasure on his face and you practically convulse.

You raise yourself on your elbows to see what he's doing, you were panting, you wanted him right there. shit

Moaning, you felt him run his tongue on the sleek of your heat, "Keep still," he murmurs and then leans down again to kiss down your clit. "How can I not move? you're making me feel this good." you felt him smirk against your skin. "Then, we'll have to work on keeping you still." there was a dangerous tone laced in his voice and you find it impossibly hot and twisted. You're flushed, skin burning, too hot, too cold, and you're craving more as you clawed at the sheets beneath you.

Johnny moves forward and you protested but the pleasure came back once more when he blows very gently on one of yours mound, his hands moving to the other breast, and his thumb slowly rolls the end of your nipple, elongating it. You moan, feeling the sweet sensation all the way to your groin.

"Johnny," you were wet, "Please," you beg silently as your fingers clasp the sheet tighter. His lips close around your nipple and he tugs, making you convulse. He doesn't stop.

Johnny moves his fingers around your clit, drawing circles as he laps on your mound,  you let yourself go from his touch. His thumb and finger continue doing you deliciously and you fall apart on his hands.

"Oh," you won't lie, that felt extraordinary, and now, you know the fuss around him is about. He gazes down at you, a satisfied smirk on his face and you're still in owe from your high.

Johnny was amazed at how responsive you are, he laced his fingers around you, drawing slow and lazy circles around your clit again, bringing another set of heat in your core. He closes his eyes briefly, his breathing hitches. You're deliciously wet and Johnny doesn't want to fuck you with a condom on, and neither did you.

He reaches over the bedside table, anyway, grabbing a foil packet, and then moving out of the bed to discard the rest of his clothes. You saw him, and your mouth watered at how long and thick he is. He kneels on the bed and pulls the condom onto his length. "I really don't want to use one."

"Is that going to fit in?"

"Don't worry," He breathes,  "You're wet enough, Angel. I know you can make me well," He murmurs as he positions the head of his erection at the entrance of your sex and pushing hard.

"Aargh!" You cry as you felt him sliding in, there was a weird sensation pinching deep inside you as he rips through you without warning. Johnny stills, his eyes bright with ecstatic triumph. His mouth opened slightly, his breathing harsh. He groans wanting to move.

"Fuck, baby, so tight."

"Johnny, Wait."

He stills for a moment, "Why?" You held onto his forearms, fucking him with a condom doesn't feel right, you wanted every little part of him, you wanted to feel him. Raw. "I- Can we remove the condom?" Johnny asks as if reading your mind.

You nod at him, You felt him slide out of you, removing the condom and throwing it at the trash bin beside his bed. Johnny positions his self once more, easing on to you, groaning. He loved every bit of it, this was the first time that you had sex without using protection, and the same thing goes for Johnny. Moving your hips up to him, as a sign that you wanted him to move already. He groans. You felt so full, as he let you acclimatize at the overwhelming feeling of him inside you. Naked, and Raw.

He eases back with exquisite slowness. Closing his eyes, Johnny controlled himself not on to fuck you hard, He thrust into you again, and you cry out in pleasure. He shifts into his elbow, and you feel his weight on you, holding you down. He moves painfully slow at first, easing himself in and out of you. You grew impatient and you can't help but move your hips up tentatively to meet his. He speeds up. Pounding on you, picking up speed by the second, merciless and in a relentless rhythm.

you can't help yourself to meet his thrust, making Johnny lose his mind because of you. Your body quivers. a sheen of sweat gathers over you. Your thoughts are scattered. There's only the feeling of him, of you, and him, and you stiffen.

"Come for me, baby," he whispers breathlessly, and you unravel at his words, exploding around him as you climax and shard into pieces with every being you had underneath him. And as he comes inside you, calling your name, thrusting hard, the stalling as he empties himself into you.

Johnny's breathing was ragged as you try to slow your breathing, your heart thumping hard and your thoughts in a disarray, you opened your eyes. His eyes flickered open and gaze down at you, dark but soft. He's still inside you, leaning down, he gently presses a kiss against your forehead then slowly pulls out of you.

Johnny cleaned you up and spoon you to sleep, he hoped that in the morning you won't regret what happened. Because he loved every moment of it.

--

Part 2? I didn't put the taglist because this is already reposted. so, yeah, hope u guys enjoyed! let me know what you think, I feel like i sucked making this.

[nnightskiess]

r e q u e s t : Hi ! How are you ? I’m so sad as to what happened with Naya she was a huge inspiration in my life and It hit me really bad But I want to ask for an imagine where you are Santana’s little sister and you come in to join the glee club and you’re better then Rachel and she starts saying stuff but you pop off on her and Santana backs you up?? If you can, sorry if it doesn’t make sense

                                                             ✫彡

Y/N sat cross-legged on a chair in the back row, texting one of her friends to try and pass the time. Mr. Schuester was late, as always. Her older sister, Santana, walked in with Brittany close behind her. They sat down in the chairs in front of Y/N and turned around to the younger Lopez to engage her in their conversation. 

Their conversation was cut short when a loud clap of hands and an exciting yelp, coming from no other than Rachel Berry, interrupted them. Santana immediately rolled her eyes, knowing she was about to say something stupid again. 

“You guys, I have amazing news!”

Y/N groaned loudly, knowing whatever Rachel had to say would probably only have interest to Rachel herself.

“I just made up my mind on what song I’ll be singing for regionals.” She went to stand in front of the group. If she had paid close attention, she’d seen that not all of them were pleased with her statement. 

“What you’ll be singing?” Y/N cocked an eyebrow when Rachel stared at her for a few seconds. “We can all sing, we’re not your ensamble.”

“Didn’t you see how much everyone loved my solo at sectionals?! I want... I mean, we want that same standing ovation for regionals!” 

“Oh, hell no.”

Puck cleared his throat, looking between Y/N and Rachel. “I kind of think Little-Lopez has a point.” 

“Yeah, why can’t someone else get a solo this time? Sure, you’re an amazing singer but maybe you should give someone else a... chance... for once?” Artie tried to reason with her but his voice slowly died down after seeing Rachel’s disappointed expression.

The girl looked at Y/N for a split second only to see her with her arms crossed and a sneer on her face.

“So I’m taking you guys don’t want to win regionals then? Because we won’t if we’re changing our obviously, well-oiled, brilliant plan.” She took a deep breath and scribbled the name of the song down on the whiteboard- Always Starting Over from the musical If/Then.

“Listen here, Berry.” Y/N cocked her head to one side, “That obviously, well-oiled, brilliant plan of yours makes us look like your jazz hands, dancing oompa loompa’s who are just there to try and make you look better. Well, Willy Wonka, get this- I’m done being your background furniture that you picked up along the road just because we were free to take and have piss stains all over us.”

Santana whistled proudly at the insult her younger sister had just thrown at Rachel and it earned a few hums of approval from some of the other Glee club members.

Rachel was taken back for a few seconds but regained herself and cleared her throat, “Did you forget the cheering I got after my part? Why can’t you see that that’s exactly what we need to win regionals as well?”

“Ptchh, you should get your facts checked because they weren’t cheering for you. We all know I’m the better singer out of the two of us.” 

Santana crossed her arms and gave Rachel a smirk, knowing who had won this argument. Everyone knew that the sassiness that ran in the Lopez family wasn’t only given to Santana. When it came to that, the two sisters were basically carbon copies of each other.

“That is so out of line! You talk the talk but when it comes to the performance you don’t walk the walk.” Rachel pointed a finger at the younger Lopez sibling and Y/N shot up, her fists balled up in rage. She was about to lounge at Rachel until Mr. Schue walked in.

“What is happening, guys?” 

“Y/N is throwing a spanner in the works of our way to end up on top at regionals.”

Mr. Schue put his bag down onto the piano and eyed the younger girl for a few seconds, silently asking her for an explanation.

Santana rolled her eyes, “Hardiharhar, don’t be so dramatic. Y/N just expressed her displeasure and put her in her place- the lowest of the low in the hierarchy, where she belongs.” She shrugged.

“Santana.” Was all that Mr. Schuester said before turning to Rachel, who pointed to the song written down on the whiteboard. 

“I’ve practiced this song for months and I think regionals is the right moment to finally sing it and show them what I got.” 

He nodded, “Wow, If/Then is a great musical. Are you sure you can handle this song?”

Rachel nodded enthusiastically.

“Very well then!” He turned to the group, “I think we just found our first song for regionals.” He smiled his goofy smile. Mercedes and Kurt looked at each other before rolling their eyes while Quinn sighed and sank into her chair.

Santana furrowed her eyebrows again and shook her head in disbelief, hoping she didn’t just hear him say that.

“Um...hello?” She waved her arms around until Mr. Schue looked at her. “Okay, good! You do see us! For a second I thought you completely forgot about the rest of us existing.”

Mr. Schue sighed and looked down before eyeing his students, “Listen, I know everyone here works very hard, and each of you has an amazing and unique voice, but for now I think that we should just let Rachel sing the solo at regionals. However, that doesn’t mean that I render any of you unworthy of taking the lead another time. You will all get to sing a part in the second song, I promise.”

“How’s that fair? We didn’t even get a chance to tell you what we would like to sing or show you what we got.” Mercedes spoke up.

“Rachel practices every day. She deserves to sing.” Finn shrugged.

“No one asked you, Finn.” Y/N shot at the boy, who widened his eyes in response. “You don’t have a leg to stand on in this discussion, we all know you will probably get the male lead.”

Y/N then turned back to Mr. Schue. “Everyone knows Rachel is your favourite and I’m sick of it. You treat her like she’s the best thing since sliced bread.”

“That’s not true. I don’t do favourites.”

“Yes, you do. You clearly favourite that vest because it’s all you’ve been wearing for the past two weeks.” Santana shrugged.

Mr. Schuester rubbed his temple. Having to deal with not only one, but two Lopez girls was making him age faster. Especially at times when they let their minds run rampant. 

Y/N crossed her arms. “I signed up for Glee club, not for ‘Sing-And-Smile-In-The-Background-Of-The-Rachel-Berry-Show’ club. Half the time, we’re not even on stage during her songs.”

“Wait, does that club exist?” Brittany mumbled under her breath. 

“Guys, when have I ever steered you wrong? Please, trust me on this.” Mr. Schuester placed his hand on his heart. 

“I think you’re just jealous.” Rachel’s tone was challenging as she sat down next to Finn. 

Y/N shot up again.

“Yes, you might know how to sing, but you’ll never be able to leave the audience as impressed as I ever will.” 

Santana now shot up as well.

“Qué acabas de decirme?” (What did you just say to me?)

Both girls made a move to lounge at Rachel but Quinn, Mike and Sam held them back. They struggled to do so while Y/N threw all the Spanish insults she knew at the girl in front of her.

“Enough!” Mr. Schuester tried but his voice didn’t stand out in the chaotic yelling. He sighed before clearing his throat.

“I want you both out.” He directed to the two sisters.

“Now!” 

Everyone fell silent and it seemed to do the trick. Y/N slowly turned to him. Mr. Schue had a stern look on his face while he glared at the siblings. He kept pointing at the door. 

“Fine.” Y/N grabbed her backpack, waited for Santana to dust herself off and grab her belongings too.

“You know what? I could use a break.” Santana huffed as both of them walked out of the room. Their heads held high, no dignity lost over what just happened.

They walked to the football bleachers where Santana immediately lit up a sigaret. 

“Do you think he kicked us out... permanently?” 

It was times like these, when it was only the two of them, where Y/N still depended on her older sister. 

“Maybe.” Santana shrugged her shoulders, “If he can’t appreciate having you in the club then that’s his loss.”

Santana gave Y/N  a playful nudge with her shoulder when the younger Lopez still seemed deep in thought. Y/N looked up to see Santana’s soft smile and she immediately sent her a goofy smile back. 

“They can’t go to regionals without us. And if they do find a way, we’ll just have to start our own Glee club, huh?” She smirked. “I’m sure it won’t take long before Mercedes is sick of it as well.” She comforted her little sister.

“Yeah, but what will we do in the meantime?”

Santana furrowed her eyebrows, wanting Y/N to elaborate.

“I can’t believe I’m about to say this- but I actually really like Glee club and I was pretty excited for regionals.”

Santana nodded, “I know you do. I can see it in your eyes when you sing.” She took another drag of her sigaret. “Between you and me, I enjoy singing in Glee club as well.” 

Y/N nodded softly and brought her legs close to her body so she could let her chin rest on her knees. 

“San?” 

Her sister hummed in return.

“Was Rachel right?” She looked up at Santana, “Am I really not giving that good of a performance?” 

“Baby, no.” Santana gave her a stern look, telling her not to go there. “You might’ve only done one couplet by yourself so far... but even in the songs where you sing background vocals, you manage to outshine the rest.”

“But there must be a reason why I haven’t got the chance to lead a song yet.”

“Yup. And that reason is Rachel, dwarf, Berry.” Santana shrugged. “You know I’d tell you if you sucked.”

Y/N laughed at that, Santana so would.

“If Mr. Schue isn’t letting us show him what we got, then we have to come up with another way to get through that head of his how capable you are of leading a song.” 

Santana suddenly stood up, put out her sigaret with her shoe and motioned for Y/N to take her hand.

It was a few days later and neither Santana or Y/N had attended Glee club after what happened on Monday. Rachel had made herself very clear to Y/N that she was very disappointed in her since Y/N’s jealousy caused the club to not be able to partake in regionals. Brittany had tried convince the two girls to join Glee club again with a clumsily, selfmade powerpoint and even Finn had kindly asked them to reconsider going back. But they simply couldn’t, at least not just yet.

But now that it was Friday, everything was ready to go. 

The two Lopez girls decided to wait a few minutes until everyone was present before they walked into the room. Mr. Schue stopped talking and turned around, a disappointed look on his face.

“We’re not here for a pity-party and we’re definitely not walking in with our tails tucked between our legs,” Santana started as a few band members shyly shuffled their way into the room, instruments in hand. 

“We just want to show you that we are fully capable of leading a song.” Y/N spoke as she shoo’d everyone to the side. 

“Hit it.”

[glee performance of tina turner’s ‘river deep, mountain high’, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82lYMlXB-fI ]

Rachel seemed unsettled during the performance, clearly noticing how everyone else was enjoying the two sisters sing. Mr. Schue, who had seem hesitant at first, was now visibly entertained and impressed and had already long forgotten what happened a few days earlier. Rachel sunk further into her seat when she noticed that. 

Everyone knew the Lopez girls both had beautiful voices, but that they would sound so well together was news to them all. Mr. Schue now realised what a shame it was that he had never explored letting different kids sing together, and that all his attention had always been on the same people.

What topped the performance off, was the excitement in the sisters’ eyes. They were clearly having fun with the song and their minds seemed to have no memory of why they originally decided to perform. It was just them and the music they danced and sang along to.

But when the band played the last melodies, they suddenly seemed to remember and turned back around to the group with proud smirks on their faces.

On the last note, Santana held her hand up for her sister to high five.

Everyone started clapping and Mr. Schuester stood up, walking up to them.  

“Ladies! That was fantastic!” He gave Y/N a pat on her shoulder. “Now that is how you sing a song! Well done!”

Rachel silently clapped along. She would never say out loud how much she had enjoyed their performance.

“I’m sorry, Rachel, but now that I’ve seen this-” Mr. Schue rubbed his chin, “I want to try a different approach at regionals. This is what will get the crowd’s attention!” 

He turned to Rachel, an apologetic look on his face, “Do you mind giving your solo to Santana and Y/N?” 

Rachel shrugged absentmindedly, trying to make it seem like she didn’t care, “It’s healthy to have some competition. It will push me to become a better performer.” 

Mr. Schue nodded and turned back to the Lopez girls. 

“Congratulations, you two. It’s yours!”

Everyone clapped again until Santana spoke up.

“No, no, no. I’m backing out.” 

“W-why?” Confusion was written all over Mr. Schue’s face. “I thought it’s what you two wanted?"

“What I wanted was for you to realise that there are other people capable of leading a performance.” She turned to her sister, who had been confused at Santana’s decision up until now. “People like Y/N, for example. You take it. I know you can do it without me.”

Y/N tried to convince her otherwise, “But you’ve never had a solo either! We should-”

“Uh, uh.” Santana waved her finger, “I want you to take it.” 

The two had a little face off for a few seconds, it was their way of talking to each other without words. Santana cocked her head to the side, knowing Y/N was about to give in.

Y/N rolled her eyes. “Fine.” 

Santana smiled widely, grabbed her sister and planted a kiss on her head.

“I’ll always back you up.” 

She winked at Y/N before the two of them went to sit down, ready for today’s Glee club.

[itsclydebitches]

RWBY Recaps: Volume 8 “Midnight”

Happy Saturday, everyone! I’d like to extend a formal congratulations to every Cinder fan in the community. Criticisms of the writing aside, you all struck gold with twelve whole minutes devoted to your fave and I’m absolutely thrilled for you.

We again start with a dark screen and some audio, in this case Cinder’s scrubbing. This technique—along with closeups on eyes—is a real favorite of RWBY’s this volume, to the point where I think they’re a little too enamored with it. But at least this is just a preference, not something that actively harms the storytelling in any way, so it’s welcome to stay. This time, unlike our premiere, we stay on Cinder as her life is summed up with three events intercut with one another: scrubbing floors, getting taunted by boys, and the sound of heels making their way towards her. It’s clear that Cinder leads a poor, miserable life, if her dirty clothes and stronger guys throwing her around is any indication, but all that changes when the rich woman says “I’ll take her” and Cinder is transported to a better life in a wealthy hotel.

At least supposedly.

Here’s my problem with the worldbuilding. This moment has Witcher vibes and Witcher, in turn, built itself off of a trope seen a hundred times before: A young woman is treated terribly by her family, is whisked away by a wealthy/powerful caretaker, and though her life has arguably improved, she quickly learns that the new world she’s entered is just as dangerous and harsh as the one she left. In Witcher’s case, Yennefer is a disabled woman abused by her family, bought by Tissaia, and taken to Aretuza where the other girls hate her and the curriculum is potentially deadly. Cinder is a poor woman arguably abused by her family (scrubbing)/the locals (fights), is taken by an unnamed woman, and whisked away to the swanky hotel where the daughters hate her and the work is potentially deadly due to shock collars. The difference between these two setups is that Tissaia bought Yennefer because of her magical potential. Why does our hotel lady take Cinder?

I mean yeah, obviously she wants a slave, but it’s a little weird isn’t it? Usually when a young woman falls headfirst into a new and questionable life, there’s a solid reason for her entry. This woman—whose lack of a name also says something about the worldbuilding—could have hired anyone she pleased to abuse. As we saw in regards to Atlas and Mantle in the past, every city has its poor and downtrodden. So what made her go out to some random farm and snatch Cinder up? It just, as always, feels a little too convenient. Cinder didn’t enter this life because something about her characterization or origin justified it, the plot simply ensured that she, out of everyone possible, and with very little reason, was the one chosen to follow The Plot™ .

It also messes with the Cinderella parallels. Originally (or “originally,” going off of Disney here which is likely what RWBY is using as a template too) it’s her step-family that abuses her and yes, we recreate that via the hiring (“hiring”—I doubt she was paid), but Cinder was already scrubbing floors back home. Her status as the servant already existed. So why change locations? Why not just keep Cinder as an abused farm girl, or have her a part of the hotel family right from the start? Part of the reason why Cinderella resonates is because of the contrast between the happy life with her father and the new, horrific life she falls into once he dies. Which is then further contrasted by the rest of the outside world. Fairy Godmother, Prince, and party-goers alike are all presented as kind, decent people. They represent the “real” world that Cinderella can escape to. By making Cinder’s original life horrible, her new life worse, and everyone connected with that life cruel and/or indifferent (with the exception of this one, special huntsmen)… you paint a very different picture of the world as a whole. Which is something RWBY has been vocal about trying to accomplish—it’s not a fairy tale—the only problem is with how these moments are undermined the second the story wants Ruby to ~Believe in People~. Cinderella is a story about enduring and eventually overcoming temporary hardship. Cinder’s story is about endless hardship that creates villains. A dark and fascinating story… but how does that fit into last week’s episode where Ruby told the whole world about Salem, expecting them to band together in peace and harmony? This is how Remnant’s world treats people when there’s not a global crisis, and Cinder isn’t even a faunus.

Which, I want to make clear going into the rest of this recap, does not excuse Cinder for her actions. At all. I think there are some complicated acknowledgements to be made in terms of her abuse and the Huntsmen’s responsibility in it continuing, but that does not give Cinder a blanket pass for all the horrific shit she has pulled over the years. Cinder didn’t just defend herself from abusers, she became one. More on that in a minute.

First though… is the Huntsmen’s name Rhodes? Did we hear that in the episode? If we did, I totally missed it because I have a note here about the one important character not getting a name. So yeah, idk. If we got this from more supplemental info, bad RWBY. If I missed it, bad Clyde. Either way, I’ll use that name going forward.

Back to the plot at hand. The hotel is, as said, populated by indifferent and shallow people and there’s no desert nearby, so I presume we’re supposed to be in Atlas? (Why did this woman buy a girl from another Kingdom?) There are customers getting drunk, flirting, and generally just enjoying their wealth, which harkens back to Weiss’ comment in Volume 4 about all their problems being superficial. We’re introduced to the owner’s two daughters who are, as expected, quintessential Mean Girls. 

They love ordering Cinder around, not just with hotel chores, but personal ones as well like, “rub my feet”… despite the fact that this place is massive and must have an equally massive staff to stay in business. Why aren’t the girls terrorizing anyone else? Again, it makes sense for Cinder(ella) to be the focus of their abuse when she’s in a single household, but transplanting that to a hotel raises a lot of questions that RWBY hasn’t bothered to examine. You can’t move a story like that and not think about what further changes that would evoke.

See, RWBY could have done something interesting here by considering some of those other changes. Like having one or both step-sisters be the one to help free Cinder from her abuse, playing the villain before becoming the fairy godmother. Up until she turns villain instead of hero, this is just Cinderella’s story copy and pasted into RWBY. It’s moments like this that should make us wary of using fairy tale allusions as evidence for our readings and theories. Whether RWBY is deconstructing or upholding a story varies wildly, and we never know what we’ll get until we actually see it on screen. Even then we can’t count on a choice remaining consistent, as we saw with Ironwood’s deconstruction being tossed out the window in Volume 7.

Cinder is originally just as meek as her fairy tale counterpart too. We don’t hear her speak until the owner is about to leave when she simply goes, “Food?” The sisters laugh at her and a roll is thrown to the floor with the comment that she should get busy because it “looks filthy.” I quite like that moment. Your job is to ensure the floors are clean enough to eat off of—literally.

We see a montage of Cinder doing just that, lots of chores, with a new song listing all the tasks she’s now responsible for. During this, Rhodes is seen in the background and witnesses when Cinder (presumably) first uses her semblance by heating up the brush and chucking it at the sisters, creating a massive cloud of steam.

 It’s that moment which “earns” her a shock session with her necklace and I’m staring at the screen, a little open-mouthed. I mean, that’s the second child torture we’ve seen this volume (with Cinder being ten here). Again, I’m not making a specific accusation, just going, “Really?”

Also, note the anti-faunus sign. Nothing like continually showing us racist establishments rather than actually writing a story that deals with the racism needless put into the story world. I’d like to remind everyone of my previous comments this Volume about how the story works hard to paint Mantle as sympathetic, but refuses to show anything that does the same for Atlas citizens, people who are in just as much danger with Salem as an equalizer. A whole city is not actually made up of shallow racists, the show is just showing us only those people to create a simplistic “They’re all bad” reading that encourages us to reject Atlas and, by extension, Ironwood. Weiss is walking proof that Atlas citizens are both complex individuals and capable of bettering themselves. If we can come to adore the Schnee heiress, we should be questioning why nearly every other citizen is painted as an abuser, too wealthy to care, or has conveniently left the story (Rhodes dead, Klein gone, Whitley rejected, etc.).

As Cinder is being tortured, we see that she’s forced to say, “Without you, I am nothing.” Now see, this is excellent... in theory. This is the kind of line we needed to hear with some consistency over the last seven years (if RWBY still insisted on waiting that long for a backstory), setting up that this line is clearly engrained in Cinder and she repeats it on instinct. Instead—to my recollection, anyway—we only get it this Volume, in two episodes. If it appeared before then it wasn’t notable enough to remember. I commented on this before, but it wasn’t a, “Ah, this line must be important” reaction, it was a “Lol why is RWBY using the same line twice? That’s weird.” By only giving it to us twice before the backstory and in such a short timeframe, the impact of this reveal is lost. We’re only now realizing that the line is important, rather than coming to realize why.

Our writers know just enough to recognize what techniques work, but not enough to have figured out what makes them tick. They get that providing a RWBY-vised version of Cinderella is cool, but not how to adapt that 100% successfully. They know that repeated lines have power, but not how to create good setup for the reveal. They know the camera should use closeups, but not what moments are important enough to warrant that. RWBY, eight years on, still feels like a newbie writer copying what the great stories are doing without yet understanding why those aspects work and, thus, how to recreate them.

I mean, Cinder’s backstory appearing now attests to that most obviously. I waved at the Cinder fans before, but the reality is that most viewers don’t care, either because Cinder herself is so bland, and/or because the story waited too long to make her a little more interesting. This entire flashback was handled badly simply by virtue of it arriving over seven years past the character’s introduction. 

So after this torture session Cinder steals Rhode’s sword. We hear some dialogue in the background of him getting pissed that it’s missing and the sisters promising to find it, implying that Cinder will have this tool at her disposal for a while. Instead, seconds later he’s found her hideout and confronts her. I don’t know if I’m impressed with Rhode’s skills, or rolling my eyes at how contrived this all is. Chuck in the question of whether Cinder was talented enough to steal the sword out from under him, or if Rhodes was stupid enough to leave it lying around, and I’m edging towards the eye rolling.

He dodges Cinder’s attack, rolls her more weapons to prove he’s not here to hurt her, and acknowledges that she’s not getting “the most fair treatment.” Okay, here’s where things start to get complicated. Rhodes tells Cinder she shouldn’t run away because then she’ll be running her whole life (don’t really agree with that). He likewise (rightly imo) tells her not to straight up murder them because look, no matter how much of a shit stain someone is, I can’t condone slamming a sword through their chest on an individual’s say-so (especially when two of those people are also kids growing up under an abuser, like Whitely). So what’s left? Rhodes says Cinder can train to become a huntress. At ten years old, she has seven years to prepare for the exam.

But she has to stay with her abusive family until then.

My problem is far less with the claim that this “has” to happen and far more with the writing’s failure to tell us why. Cinder could have begged to come with Rhodes and he says she can’t because… idk. Make up a reason. He doesn’t make enough to feed the both of them. It would be too dangerous out on missions without training and he doesn’t have a permanent place to stay (hence using the hotel all the time). He could even go the “They’re your legal guardians” route with more explanation because it’s arguable that Rhodes had no idea about the collar. Doesn’t mean Cinder’s treatment isn’t “that bad” in his eyes, just that he might not have known the extent and thus thought it was preferable for Cinder to put up with “just” being insulted and overworked until she’s 17. That this life that he only has a partial picture of is preferable to the life she’d have at his side. Something to explain the stakes here, the risks, and why he took this stance. 

And/or give us a reason why Cinder doesn’t try to run, a suggestion I make very cautiously because it’s not my intention to put the responsibility solely on her. This isn’t meant to be a “Just save yourself! It’s easy!” claim. Rather, it’s an acknowledgement that young, barely trained kids go out into the world all the time in this show—Ruby, Oscar—and it’s an acknowledgement that Cinder tugged off her collar easy-peasy. The point is, practically speaking, Cinder could have left and braved the streets like Emerald did… so give us a reason why she decided to stay. Maybe she’s scared of living on the streets, acknowledging that a little food and a place to sleep is better than nothing. Maybe she’s scared that if she doesn’t have a direct connection to the hotel (convenience), Rhodes won’t train her anymore. Maybe, as an abuse victim, she can’t articulate why she won’t leave, she just can’t. Something to acknowledge these gaps because, right now, we just have the fandom going, “See? This is why the huntsmen are all evil cops. Rhodes took the lawful route and look where it got Cinder! He’s the responsible adult in this situation, so it’s all his fault.” Problem is, this take ignores: 

The fact that our heroes are also huntsmen and were pretending to be huntsmen before they had those lawful licenses. So what does that make them? We can’t continually criticize these professional roles without criticizing our heroes’ use of them as well. Ruby just ensured the world would take her message seriously by introducing herself as a huntress. We can’t condemn these laws and privileges while likewise letting Ruby continue to use them however she please. It’s okay if she’s a part of the system, because Ruby is inherently good! That’s not how this works. I’ve just described every American cop show that tumblr is currently turning against: The system is corrupt and needs to be overhauled, but our protagonists are different. 

The story fails to tell us why Rhodes won’t do more outside of a single line about Cinder being of legal age. That just acknowledges that age has some bearing on his decision, not whether it outweighs other considerations (can Cinder survive if she leaves?), or whether Rhodes even has a full picture of what’s happening to her (the collar). The takeaway is that we don’t know what his though process was because RWBY didn’t show it to us, not that his thought process is automatically awful. 

Rhodes, as a literal stranger entering her life, is not 100% responsible for what happens to Cinder. I know people don’t want to acknowledge that because leaving a child in that situation is absolutely horrific, but if RWBY wants to be ~realistic~ (and it does) then we need to acknowledge that reality too. If you saw a child employee getting yelled at in a hotel and then found her with your sword, would you rip the collar off her neck and be like, “Congratulations, you’re my child now”? Nice as that trope is, probably not! Or hell, maybe a lot of you would upend your life and risk legal action to whisk them away, but a lot of other people wouldn’t... and they're not the devil for doing what they can within the bounds of the law. The idea that because Rhodes unexpectedly had one (1) encounter with Cinder means he’s now responsible for her life and outcome is, well, crazy. “But, Clyde, you can’t just see that kind of horror and not do something about it.” You’re right. You know what you do? Tell the authorities. But does Remnant have the equivalent of social workers? We don’t know! Which means we can’t assume that Rhodes didn’t call them just because he’s a bad person. Or maybe they exist and the fandom considers them too corrupt to be useful, like so many other authorities in this show. So… what else is there for him to do? There doesn’t seem to be anyone above Rhodes that he can turn to, he doesn’t (for whatever reason) want to essentially kidnap Cinder and start a new life with her, so what’s left? Try to give Cinder a healthy relationship and a way to escape in the long run, which is precisely what Rhodes did. 

Honestly, I’m kind of salty that this guy went out of his way to help her, he saw what everyone else saw and was the only one who would help her, but because he didn’t do more—because he didn’t entirely upend his life and/or risk arrest to take her away to this hypothetically better situation—the fandom is acting like it’s his fault Cinder killed her abusers. It’s not. Cinder made that choice.

At the end of the day, blaming Rhodes reveals the expectation that it’s his responsibility to solve this massive problem purely because he had the bad luck to be the one Cinder stole from. That’s like telling a teacher who learns about abuse from a paper that following the lawful channels and going out of his way to assist the child in other ways is responsible when the kid murders their family one day. “Why didn’t you just barge into the house and take the kid?!” Because there are a hundred reasons why that would go incredibly badly? Rhodes can’t help Cinder if he’s in jail. Rhodes can’t help Cinder if she ends up dead on a mission while following him. Rhodes can’t help Cinder if their attempt at escape fails and she bears the punishment. 

The only thing I think Rhodes did absolutely wrong was giving Cinder the sword while she was still under the owner’s thumb. Stupid, but not cruel. And again, stupid does not equal blanket responsibility. I’m likewise seeing, “Rhodes gave her the sword and thus it’s his fault that Cinder got in trouble. It’s his fault they died. What was Cinder supposed to do, not defend herself?” Are people forgetting that Cinder stole the sword herself in the beginning and then readily accepted it again? She had agency in obtaining weaponry and what she wanted it for. Are people forgetting that, in accepting it, she likewise accepted the risk of keeping it hidden in the hotel? Are people forgetting that the time skip shows this happening years later and that Rhodes clearly thought Cinder was past her murderous streak? Are people forgetting that Cinder killed the owner by snapping her neck and resisting the shock collar, no sword required? She could have killed them any time she pleased based on the crime scene, whether Rhodes had given her a weapon or not. The weapon was just the catalyst that, truthfully, could have been caused by anything else. Cinder snaps when they find the sword and she’s tortured. Cinder snaps when she drops another tray and she’s tortured. She had planned to kill her abusers and never completely let go of that. 

Honestly, I’m just annoyed that we have another good hearted, takes action, does his best and makes some mistakes character getting blamed for everything another character chose to do, erasing their agency in the process. Rhodes did not abuse Cinder. Rhodes did not force her to kill her actual abusers. And Rhodes is certainly not responsible for what Cinder later becomes. Could Rhodes have done more? Of course, but every character could always do more. 

The tl;dr is that this complex situation needed far better setup in the show and the fandom needs to stop using that lack of setup as “proof” that characters are horrible people when they fail to magically fix said complicated, badly explained problems. Cinder chose to murder three people. Whether that was justified in the face of her abuse is up to you to decide, but it was still her choice. Please stop blaming the adult male characters for the choices the teenage girls in this show make. RWBY is too convoluted and attempting to tackle too many complex issues to reduce that to, “Every man here is the evil, responsible party and ever girl is a #queen. Even when they go on to murder Pyrrha ^_^” As a woman who would very much like to be rooting for the mostly-woman cast more than I now do, this isn’t the feminist take people want it to be.  

But I’ve jumped waaaay ahead. Let’s backtrack a bit.

That first interaction between Rhodes and Cinder is super weird because the camera keeps covering Rhodes’ face and I don’t know why. 

We segue into that montage of him training her for presumably years (Cinder’s hair changes) until we see him giving her the sword in what’s meant to be a moment of pride and trust. Soon after, Rhodes (randomly) comes back to the hotel when everyone else is asleep and hears noises in the back. Moving to check them out, he discovers that Cinder has murdered the two sisters and is in the process of murdering the owner, throwing back the line, “Without you, I am nothing, but because of you, I am everything.” Again, much more impactful if this had been a line we’ve associated with Cinder for years now, not a couple of episodes.

After she breaks the owner’s neck (damn, strong hand!) she tells Rhodes she doesn’t have to run anymore. Cinder clearly expects him to be happy for her and is shocked when he takes out his weapons.

I’m sorry, this is not a “betrayal.” Could Rhodes have just let Cinder go? Sure. Should he have? Given what she becomes, that’s very debatable! Rhodes clearly thought he’d helped her grow into someone who was not inclined towards murder (giving her the sword) and thus is probably going to be a little rattled when he walks in to find her killing three people. Again, there are obvious differences given the level of abuse Cinder seems to have suffered in comparison, but imagine that Glynda, after teaching Weiss for years, walked in on her killing Jacques and Whitley in revenge. Is she supposed to just ignore that? Shrug her shoulders and wish her well? I know a lot of people consider that the “fair” outcome given the inclusion of abuse, but that’s because we’ve had an omniscient view of Cinder’s history and insight into her emotional state. Rhodes doesn’t have that. All he has is his oath as a huntsmen to prevent things like, you know, murder sprees. I’m not going to delve into the overall ethics of a judicial system, either in RWBY or the real world, and thus I’m not going to make any naive claims about it being fair—it’s fucking not—but I don’t think the answer to these systematic problems is, “Why wouldn’t you just let the teenager murder three bad people and then go on her way? She totally deserved it!” Rhodes is not in a position to decide that, which is the entire point of having a judicial system in the first place. 

So Rhodes wants to bring Cinder in. Kind of like how Clover wanted to bring Qrow in once he had an arrest warrant. I can’t emphasize enough that wanting to start a legal process rather than letting clearly guilty/potentially guilty people go because they WANT to is not a “betrayal.” Regardless of what teen dramas may have taught us, you don’t have to potentially throw your own freedom and your morals away because you found out a friend is wanted by the authorities. Or you walk in on them currently snapping someone’s neck. There are options other than, “Believe your friend is right without question and help them hide the bodies” (looking at you, Maria, Pietro). Whitely is not insane for going, “Hey, can you not make me an accomplice to a crime by forcing your way in here with a bunch of fugitives?” I’m constantly surprised by the number of fans who can, in one breath, condemn characters for not throwing a middle finger up at the law and in the next praise Jacques’ arrest. Do we want to benefit from this system or not? If yes, that means you have to weigh which laws can be broken (such as in a protest), which should be obeyed (bring murderers and wanted men in), all while working to change the laws that are prejudice and aren’t working. 

Anyway, they fight. It’s short and sweet, backdropped by the large clock striking midnight, hence our title. I’m incredibly suspicious of Cinder breaking Rhode’s aura first, given that she’s still the student in training, but here we can more persuasively say he wasn’t fighting seriously, given that he then stupidly rushes towards her without a weapon. Still, that would be the second time now that RWBY has relied on elite fighters “holding back” to explain how the kids in training beat them, the first instance, of course, being with the Ace Ops.

Rhodes does rush Cinder though when she hits the wall and breaks her own aura, clearly concerned. She uses the moment to stab him with both swords. He uses his last breaths to put a hand on her head, conveying that he doesn’t blame her for how this all turned out.

Then Cinder pulls off her collar with a single snap and looks up at the broken moon, crying her single tear.

I’m dragging the flashback for multiple reasons, but I want to emphasize that I think this episode is leagues better from what we got last week. Absolute night and day. It’s just that, as always, improvements are incredibly comparative in RWBY. It’s not really good for numerous reasons… it’s just better than what we’ve gotten before. It’s “great” provided you go in with standards buried in the ground.

We then return to the present as Cinder wakes up in Salem’s whale. This scene gives us a great shot of her grimm arm, so cosplayers take note!

Emerald arrives soon after and immediately rushes to her side, expressing how worried she was. She grabs Cinder’s grimm hand without hesitation. Honestly, I don’t care much about either character… but this single frame activated some sort of ship button in my brain.

Not fully because I’m personally not drawn to toxic relationships in fiction (which, as I’m about to explain, would absolutely be the case here), but just the tinniest bit. Because I’m a sucker for monstrous people being loved despite their monstrous nature, so having Emerald take that hand over the other is like a ship speed run for me.

I’m predictable, folks.

But we need to talk about less happy things for a moment. I mentioned above Cinder becoming an abuser herself. I hope I don’t need to lay out the laundry list of murders, attempted murders, sabotage, and general taking-over-the-world-ness she’s engaged in since Episode One. Don’t let a sad backstory erase all that. Hell, for all we know the hotel owner had a horrific backstory too! Doesn’t justify how she treated Cinder. The point though is beyond her clear status as a villain, we now know that Cinder treats Emerald just like the owner once treated her.

Cinder was “rescued” from her life on the farm by the owner. Emerald is “rescued” from her life on the streets by Cinder.

Both realize over time that the situation they’re now in is actually worse.

Both reiterate that they “owe” the other “everything,” with Cinder having that shocked into her and Emerald seeming to willingly believe it.

The owner treats Cinder as a slave. Cinder treats Emerald as a slave. “Both of you, get out. I’ll let you know when you’re needed.” The only difference is that Cinder’s orders were things like “Scrub floors” and Emerald’s are “Convince an audience this girl attacked our ally.”

Both use threats to keep the other in line: the owner with her shock collar and Cinder with her Maiden powers. Cinder doesn’t need to resort to violence (yet) because Emerald adores her, but the threat is always there. 

There are even visual similarities this episode, such as kneeling and gem necklaces, though I acknowledge fully that those are just interesting details as opposed to anything like persuasive proof. 

The point is that Cinder became exactly what she hated, she just turned the dial up to eleven by going after the whole world instead of a single child. “But Cinder never had a chance to be anything else.” Sure she did. Blake and Weiss are proof of that. Even if we believe that Cinder was doomed to be a villain due to the extent of her abuse, what does that say about the hotel’s owner? We don’t know anything about her history, so what if she was abused too? Does that mean she was always “doomed” to treat Cinder that way? Does that excuse everything she did to her because she supposedly never stood a chance of becoming anything else? Of course not.

Though very iffily done, this is a commentary on the cycle of abuse. Each case is horrific, but it doesn’t excuse what comes later. Every abuser was once an innocent child and every innocent child has the capability of becoming the next abuser. Cinder’s life up until now was beyond awful and yes, she lacked a lot of privileges that others had to help them head down a better path, like Weiss’ wealth. On the other hand, she lacks other difficulties that would make that path harder for others, like Blake’s status as a faunus. Everyone has a choice to make: Will you treat others the way you were treated because that’s “fair,” or will you decide to treat others better than what you were dealt? There are lots of aspects that factor into the likelihood of someone choosing the latter—which is why I really like Rhode’s hand on Cinder’s head, acknowledging his understanding that she’s an abused kid taking the only path she thinks is available to her—but individual agency is by no means removed from the equation. Cinder escaped her situation and decided she’d never be powerless again. What does that mean to her, perhaps becoming a community member who works to prevent abuse like the kind she suffered? No, it means grinding the entire world under her heel until she’s the only one with power left.

This GIF continues to be the only one I need.

(No, the fact that it comes from a cop show and I’m using it for such an anti-law, anti-establishment story/fandom isn’t lost on me.)

(Also, if anyone is curious, this is why I love Ozpin. Out of everyone in this cast, HE has suffered the most, tenfold, and yet he still chooses to be kinder to those than they’ve been to him.) 

Anyway, I should really stick to the plot lol. Cinder realizes that her waking up means that they’ve lost, which I still think is BS. Cinder needed a win to come across as a formidable villain again and the likes of Neo, Emerald, and a Maiden with years of practice under her belt should have wiped the floor with a scientist, retirement grandma, and a girl who got the powers an hour ago. But I again digress.

Mercury reveals that he will no longer be following Cinder’s orders because Salem has a special job for him. They’ve all been told to meet on the bridge.

Then we cut to Ozpin and Oscar.

My poor boy is a mess and Ozpin is in the process of begging Oscar to take a “break.” “I would like to express again that this is my burden to bear, not yours.” Take note, fandom. In a few moments Hazel will accuse Ozpin of being a “coward” because “All this time, it could have been you, but you let him suffer.” I just know a bunch of people will be going, “Yeah! Ozpin just let a kid get tortured instead of him. WTF??” Okay 1. We should always be suspicious of agreeing with the takes villains have and 2. Oscar just refused to let Ozpin do that. It is—again—his choice because he thinks that Hazel is “holding back” with him. Oscar is being a brave and logical dude trying to make the best of this situation for both of them. Don’t take that away from him just to make Ozpin look bad. What would we even want him to do? Take control back? The fandom has been yelling at Ozpin for that since Volume 5.

So they’re going back and forth when Oscar suddenly announces that they “can’t leave yet. This is our chance.”

Ozpin even says he thinks Oscar must have taken one too many hits because… yeah. What? Long story short, Oscar recognizes that they’ll never be this close to Salem’s subordinates again and that they should try to undermine her from the inside out, just like she’s done with the world since she knows she can’t take on everyone at once. I love Oscar taking charge here, I love them speaking in unison, I even love the hope of achieving something epic while in captivity despite my own belief that Oscar should break and reveal the Lamp’s password. What I don’t love is:

Another messy, unexpected belief that Salem made her choices because she “knows” she can’t win any other way. Except that—like Ruby’s line in the recording—Salem’s current attack blows that idea out of the water. She IS taking on the whole world. Granted, Ozpin and Oscar presumably don’t know that the whole world literally knows of her existence now, or that Salem was smiling about it, but they do know that she’s attacking Atlas head on. What else is that except a declaration of war with all of Remnant?

The idea of undermining Salem from the inside via Hazel. For anyone who reads my other metas, I just said that this idea wouldn’t work because Emerald isn’t the one torturing him, the one character who has consistently demonstrated hesitation (or, now, Neo). Hazel despises Ozpin so much that he would never listen to him. He despises him so much he doesn’t even see Oscar as his own person… at least he didn’t before. That’s been retconned now with Hazel going “easy” Oscar and having an actual conversation with Ozpin. Whereas before, he was slamming Oscar into walls and screaming about how he’s going to kill the “murderer” of his sister. They basically softened his character to make this plan possible.

The fact that this scene came about without Oscar and Ozpin ever getting to reconcile their problems. Last we saw them, Oscar was saying how he hated that Ozpin came back and refusing to acknowledge their merge. Now, they’re working together like they’ve always been solid allies. I get that the danger they’re in helps to put it all into perspective, but why can’t we get a few lines of them hashing this out? Or at least putting things aside until they’re out of Salem’s clutches? If you don’t need to re-write Hazel’s character with “he’s going easy on me” lines, you can use that space to deal with the conflict we’ve already established. Especially given the strange choice to have Oscar refuse to give up control and be the one coming up with this plan... but then Ozpin does take control and (maybe, see below) enacts it? I feel like we’ve missed huge chunks of this story. As it is, I wonder if RWBY will bother coming back to this. The questions of if/how Oscar will accept Ozpin and if/how he’ll reveal this secret to the group feels like they’re being swept under the rug and it will likely go unnoticed by a lot of viewers simply due to how intense the kidnapping plot is.

So things are a little messy, but otherwise enjoyable, and they’re about to get downright confusing. For me, anyway. See, Hazel reveals that he follows Salem because she can’t be beaten (cue my continued worry about Ruby telling the whole WORLD). She “can’t be stopped. She’s a force of nature,” and Ozpin is fighting a “cause with no victory, no end.” He yells back that “Someone has to try!”—bless this man—and then looks down at the ground going, “Salem can be fought. Unless… she brings the Relics together, if that happens…” and mentions summoning the Gods.

So here’s my confusion. The scene makes it feel like Ozpin is planting some sort of seed in Hazel’s head. He and Oscar JUST got done agreeing to try and undermine her from the inside out, then we get this line that feels like him “accidentally” dropping a secret that will turn Hazel against her. Except… Ozpin doesn’t lie here? The line isn’t useful to them as far as I can tell. They are screwed if Salem gets the Relics. …Right? Because if not, why the hell have the heroes been working so hard to keep them out of her hands? So I can’t decide if:

A) This scene is just written badly and none of this is part of the plan to undermine Salem.

B) Ozpin is going, “NO. Don’t collect the RELICS. That would be the WORST THING EVER /s” in an attempt to trick Hazel into doing it anyway and this is somehow supposed to hurt Salem, despite being presented since Volume 5 as the worst outcome for our heroes? 

C) Ozpin specifically wants Salem to make the mistake of summoning the Gods because he thinks he’s completed his task? Or something? But what in the world would make him think that—especially without seeing Ruby’s message (not to mention the lack of unity that mess should cause)—or what makes him think the Gods would just destroy Salem regardless of what he’s achieved? If summoning the Gods was ever a defeat Salem option, why hasn’t he done it before?

I’m leaning towards A just because it makes the most sense by far, but that would also mean we had Ozpin and Oscar decide on this plan, have a chance to start this plan… and then didn’t actually do anything. Yelling at Hazel for following Salem isn’t a new strategy, they were doing that before, so what’s new? Or has the new strategy not been revealed yet? Idk, as happy as I am to see them being BAMF together, I’m slightly unsure about how it all hangs together. I’d much rather have an internally consistent and clear outcome that’s predictable (Oscar breaks or just holds out until rescue) rather than what appears like a super cool, badass, unexpected plot on the surface… but crumbles once you poke at the foundation a bit.

So whether Oscar and Ozpin started this plan or not, they’re dragged into the throne room where they’re forced to kneel before Salem. Yikes. She sits on her throne with the Hound, who I’m only now realizing could be read as a messed up Toto

We learn that Tyrian heard from Watts about his incarceration and hacking Penny. What? Okay, I took the time to go back through “Amity” just to find this screenshot.

That’s not a working Scroll! Idk what I thought Watts might do with it at the end of last week, but it wasn’t send a full, uninterrupted message to Salem that updates her on everything that’s gone down in Atlas. This thing is toast! Moments like this make me question how much communication there really is between the writers and the animators, despite last Volume’s disaster with Oscar telegraphing his punch like whoa. Are we still getting that level of miscommunication? 

Salem then punishes Cinder for disobeying her by hurting her grimm arm. See, this here (for me, anyway) is the mark of a newbie writer. When the moment first started I went, “Oh nice. Just like the shock collar!” Then the scene made that abundantly clear by cutting to flashbacks of Cinder in her collar. That’s too heavy-handed. We already got the parallel, but then the show went, “Do you get it??” It shows that the writers are too scared that the viewers won’t get it, that their nuance will be lost, so they scramble to make it as obvious as possible, rather than trusting in their own writing.

And if you’re like, “So you want RWBY to be more clear and also… less clear?” the answer is, sadly, yes lol. The things that are already confusing due to retconning and inconsistent themes need to be made explicit, whereas the details that are already strong don’t need an in-your-face, “Okay, but did you really get the parallel here? We’re just making sure.” It’s like launching into explaining why a joke is funny when it’s already landed vs. telling a nonsensical joke and then waiting for the laugh that will never come. RWBY struggles in both areas.  

Salem delves into this speech about how this is actually all her fault and she should let Cinder spread her wings or something. AKA, go free Watts and track down Penny. Then you can have your precious Maiden powers. 

There’s a massive earthquake across Mantle and we watch a + medical symbol go out. Again, heavy-handed. We don’t need that in order to understand that the whole city shaking while the grimm look happily up to the sky is a bad thing.

We cut to Winter listening to the Ace Ops complain about Penny. She tells them to act like the elite they are, likely because she hates how they refer to Penny as “junk.” Still being set up to betray Ironwood, I bet. During this scene we learn that they have “confirmed visual of her leaving Amity. She appeared to be malfunctioning.” So Penny is alive? Also, they have eyes on Amity Tower and were able to see Penny leaving, but didn’t see any of our trio coming to launch it in the first place? Did Ironwood want it to launch? Did they see Cinder? I just don’t know.

Before they can get there though a message from Jaune comes through. Serious kudos to Team JNY for asking that “anyone” respond/taking the personal risk of calling for help in the first place. They’re finally putting—as Harriet says—they’re own selfishness aside in favor of the greater good. Yang obviously hates that it’s “you guys” they ended up with, but she’s not outright attacking the Ace Ops or anything. I’m like,

Excellent job, Yang. 

Jaune is a little harsh in his panic. He said in his message that a “large mass of grimm” is heading towards Mantle and then when Harriet leads with asking about Penny, wants to know what’s wrong with her. Why are you asking about Penny when lives are in danger and “it’s” (the grimm) are “right there”? Except he, uh… points at nothing. There’s the chasm with (I presume) the weird grimm goo down it? Not sure based on the shot, but the Ace Ops expected a “mass of grimm” and then land to see no grimm anywhere nearby. So yeah, they’re more focused on the missing Maiden than the seemingly imaginary enemy Jaune is freaking out about.

They only get on board when the river launches itself at Atlas.

So the goo is, like, sentient before it becomes individual grimm? Or Salem is controlling it from her whale? Either way it’s BAD.

I want to briefly gripe about how the hell everyone is watching this. What, is there a camera conveniently trained on this one random part of Atlas’ underside and everyone’s scrolls tuned into that the second the attack started? It seems far-fetched, to put it mildly. In RWBY’s favor though, I want to acknowledge that we finally have appropriate expressions for the situation! This is good!!

I’m going to level with you all. My notifications have known no peace since I made the mistake of criticizing the adored trio that is Ruby, Weiss, and Blake. I thought supporting Ironwood would get me heat. Nope. Not supporting the main girls is what did it and honestly? I shouldn’t have been surprised. Last week I pointed out that having them smile and, in Ruby’s case, coo during a moment of horror is not good animation and implies some pretty uncomfortable things about their overall sympathy level. The image in question: 

It doesn’t set a good tone, especially when we add in what we’ve gotten for Ruby’s group across the rest of this volume. The counters of, “They need and deserve a break. Why won’t you let them be happy?” fall flat when we ignore that this group has been animated as consistently goofing off post-premiere. Sneaking into the guarded military base of a former friend? Tube shenanigans! Need to find your way around? Funny Penny moment! Semblance reveal? Cutesy chibi explanation! Need to do more sneaking? Silly coffee plan! Nora gets electrocuted? Joke about how awesome that was! Even Wiess telling Whitley to go to his room reads as funny to the audience.

Ruby in particular has been a problem, given that she’s our main character and the others’ leader. We take our emotional cues primarily from her. Alongside being a part of all these fun and games, her animation during more serious moments has been less than stellar. This is Penny when Nora goes down.

This is Ruby, Weiss, and Blake. No worry, just focused on the fight.

This is Penny when the fight is over.

This is Ruby, Weiss, and Blake. No worry, just chatting about suspicious activity.

This is Penny in the airship, worrying about Nora and the situation they’re in. This is also Ruby in the airship, apparently not worried at all.

This is Ruby when she learns her uncle is in jail. Is there shock? Fear? Horror that he might be in serious trouble? No, she just maintains the same emotion she had before: fury at Harriet.

So when we reach them watching the recording and they look like this:

No, I’m not convinced that this trio is taking the situation seriously, or that they really care about the people involved. I know they’re supposed to care, they all obviously care from a meta perspective, but the “obviousness” of that only exists in our personal understanding of the characters if we don’t see it on screen. I completely believe that Penny is worried about Nora because she’s animated expressing that worry. I completely believe that JRY are in the middle of a warzone because they’re (mostly) animated as fearful and angry. The rest of Ruby’s team has a scared line from Blake and Weiss holding Nora’s hand, whereas the majority of the emotion across this adventure has been indifference or playfulness. That’s a problem given how horrible the events of this Volume have been, most of which the group is aware of. 

All of which is an incredibly long-winded way of saying that this

finally feels appropriate. Well done, RWBY. 

Alright, this recap is already over 7k long so I want to return to our plot with the summarized: IRONWOOD WAS RIGHT. He said they couldn’t withstand a head on attack by Salem and he was right. It literally took seconds for her grimm to burrow into Atlas, knock out a tower, and disable the shield. Everyone still claiming that leaving is useless because it’s oh so obvious Salem’s grimm could fly however high it wants (when did we learn that?) are ignoring that leaving was at least a plan with some kind of hope attached to it. And, given her focus on the Staff, may have saved Mantle by drawing Salem’s attention away from the city. The point is we don’t know. All we do know is that Ironwood tried to do something in the face of hopeless odds, Ruby’s team stopped him, and now look, everything is awful. No one could have possibly seen that coming. 

Salem: “It’s time.”

I’m very pleased that Salem is finally using the tools at her disposal. Upon reflection, I still don’t buy why she had to wait. “Well, she was waiting for the grimm goo.” She couldn’t have used flying grimm to take out the tower? Take a burrowing grimm and give it wings? She couldn’t have used the goo that was apparently inside her whale the whole time?

It’s all very convenient. In the sense that we’re drawing out the volume by having the villain inexplicably hang back, despite not having a good reason to. In the sense that—unless Ruby’s message comes back to bite her—the villain’s passivity also conveniently let the heroes accomplish the one goal they were desperate to achieve. All of that’s still not good, but at least the Volume seems to be moving out of the “not good” category and into the ���slightly better” territory. 

Although, as I just acknowledged to a friend, RWBY seems to alternate for me. Every time I have an episode where I think, “Okay, there are still massive problems here, but I can see a glimmer of hope” the next episode is inevitably the pits. 

Still, grabbing onto that hope with both hands: Atlas should be decimated, folks! Grimm are swarming, our idiot heroes herded everyone directly under the city, the world should be panicking, and the cold should still be killing people if the story remembers that it exists. At this point my only question is wtf our heroes are supposed to do next, but regardless of what the plot gives us, it’s going to be wild. You all know what’s coming. Next week is our final episode before a two month hiatus, which means we’re going to witness all kinds of awful and then end on a six week cliffhanger. It’s inevitable, so best to emotionally prep for that now lol.

I don’t believe we have any Bingo updates, with the exception of edging towards a few: “Winter betrays Ironwood,” “Army of grimm conveniently doesn’t kill any civilians,” “Atlas somehow survives,” and “Ironwood dies” being the most notable. We’ll have to see what, if anything, gets checked off next Saturday.

As always, thank you so much for reading (I feel like I don’t say that enough :D) and I’ll see you next week! 💜

[Ko-Fi]

[sapphicmsmarvel]

EP: Siren Queen

masterlist

Premise: Y/N L/N is a part of the world's biggest girl group. A stalker starts harassing her and her band mates so their label calls in the BAU. 

The case was weird for the BAU. It was a stalker case for a famous girl, Y/N L/N, she was part of the worlds most successful girl group. Garcia was all too excited to be involved in the case. Of course, she hated that you were being stalked but she was a huge fan. 

“You better tell me everything!” She squealed, “If she’s nice, if she’s as hot as she is on camera, if the other girls are nice, if they are ‘just like us’ please!” 

“If I didn’t know any better I’d think you were the stalker, Garcia.” JJ joked.

“If someone hurts that ray of sunshine I will stalk them!” She shouted through the video call and then hung up. 

JJ flipped through the file, “we have five days to catch this guy before they go on tour. And the girls are refusing to cancel.” “Even if their lives are at stake?” 

“They said that they will not cancel because it’s the opening to their world tour and they won’t risk disappointing fans because they know people are flying in from all over the country.” Prentiss explained. 

“Shouldn’t the label put the girls first?” Morgan asked. 

“Usually labels tend not to care about artists.” Reid said, “the amount of label abuse that’s been coming to light is horrific you guys should read up on it.” 

He looked up as everyone looked at him confused, he explained, “Simon Cowell for example, there are claims against him because of abuse towards clients. Overworking them, homophobic comments, racist comments, sexist comments you name it.”

“What groups?” JJ asked. 

“Little Mix and One Direction are the two most prominent ones.” Reid said flicking through the file. 

“How do you know all this?” “Garcia.” He answered. “Then I did my own research because I was fascinated by the music industry. It never hurts to learn even if I don’t know anything about it.” 

The team left it at that, and continued digging through the evidence of your stalker. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The team was currently sitting in one of the rehearsal rooms. There were couches, a snack bar, a coffee stand, everything except the girls they were meeting. 

Their publicist Ramona looked at them all apologetically, “I’m so sorry, the girls seem to be in traffic. They’re with trusted drivers and security guards.” 

“Have they been background checked?” Hotch asked. 

Ramona nodded, “we all were when we were taken on, we were when this stalker showed up as well. The dancers, the crew, everybody those girls come into contact with are background checked.” 

“Even interviewers?” Reid asked. Ramona nodded, “without their knowledge, just like you advised. If this got leaked…” Ramona shook her head, “we all know what happens to victims of stalkers, it isn’t foreign in this business.” 

At that moment the girls all came in, Emily recognized them from the files. Apparently, even your bandmates got checked. Zoey came in first, snuggled in her hoodie, her jeans were rumpled and her heels were clacking. Her smile falling off her face the second she walked into the room. Her blonde hair was tousled as if she was running her hands through it a lot. Her green eyes were tired.

Leaning on her was Brooke, who was also looking exhausted. Ramona told them that they had been up since 4 am doing press, it was now 4pm. They had a two hour rehearsal next, then dinner, then vocal rehearsal, then they could go to their hotel. Apparently it was an easy day for them. Brooke's black hair was in it’s natural curls, she wore heels as well as a dress. 

The two were holding hands. 

Then came in Liz, she was wearing a black long sleeve shirt, shorts and a beanie as well as heeled boots. She didn’t look as tired, she looked fiercely protective as she was holding your hand. 

You looked anxious, you were also in a hoodie, jeans and heeled boots, all black. Your eyes were darting around the room as you took in everyone around you. Your eyes startled when they landed on Emily, Emily wasn’t sure why. 

Ramona introduced all of them to the girls then said “Sit down girls.” 

Three of them did, you had other ideas and went and got coffee. “Y/N, that’s your fourth cup.” 

You held up a finger, “I don’t want to hear it, Ramona. I have a stalker out there and I have to act like everythings normal, if Marcus has a problem with it, he can suck my dick.” 

Morgan looked at Emily with wide eyes. Emily shrugged. Then looked at Reid, “who’s Marcus?”  She asked him. 

“Their choreographer.” “Why does it matter what he says?” 

“Because he cares about us and is a fitness nut.” You answered, “you’re not very good at whispering.” You deadpanned, sipping your coffee. 

“Y/N!” Ramona scolded. 

You rolled your eyes, and Zoey spoke up, “give her a break Ramona. She never gives you issues, let her live.” 

“It’s okay,” Emily spoke up, “I understand what it’s like to be afraid of looking over your shoulder.”

You nodded, avoiding eye contact. You felt guilty for snapping, that much she could tell. 

“Okay, let’s get started.” Hotch said, “do you have any particular fans you’d like to tell us about, people have stood out?” 

“We have a lot of...dedicated fans.” Zoey said, to put it gently. “Some good, some bad, some that are really intense.” 

You scoffed from where you were standing, “that's putting it lightly.” You grabbed a mini chocolate chip cookie.. 

“Do girl groups have groupies?” Morgan asked. 

“Of course we do,” Liz said, her tan cheeks gaining a rosy color. You sat in between her and Zoey, Brooke was next to Zoey. You had three other cookies in your hand and handed them to the others. 

“We recognize the line between fans and stalkers as well as people who don't agree with who we are. But there’s been nothing like this.”  Brooke shuddered.

“Don’t agree with who you are?” JJ asked. 

You held up a hand, “queer.” 

Brooke raised her hand, “black.” 

Liz raised hers, “philipino and black. So mixed race.” 

Then Zoey raised hers as well, “I’m ‘too skinny’ so everyone thinks I have an eating disorder.” 

You piped up, “I’ve also been fat shamed by the worlds biggest media outlets, it’s nothing new to find hate online.” 

Emily grimaced and she knew her team was doing the exact same thing. 

“Do you have any ideas as to who it could be?” Rossi asked.

“There’s one,” Zoey said, “but Y/N insists it can’t be him.” 

“You need to tell us.” Emily said, everyone looked at you. 

You sighed, “he went to jail when we were teens for sexual misconduct. I was the first person he assaulted and harassed consistently. But I didn’t press charges.” “Why not?” Morgan asked. 

“Because I was a fourteen year old girl who didn’t recognize that it was sexual assault.” You snapped, then sighed, “I’m sorry Agent Morgan. It’s touchy.” Zoey took your hand, Liz took your other one, Brooke reached over and put her hand on top of Zoeys. “To be honest, I don’t know where I would be without these three.” You admitted. Emily admired it, the sisterhood between you four. 

“How long have you guys been friends?” JJ asked. 

“We met in high school, then formed the band.” Brooke answered. 

 “Do you know if he’s out?” 

You sighed, “he is. But he lacks the brain cells to pull this stuff off.”

“It’s not that hard to mail letters.” JJ said. 

“Yeah but, he shouldn’t know the exact times we show up at venues, interviews, he isn’t smart enough to think of how to obtain that information. As kids he was not smart, at all.” You said, letting go of your friends’ hands and you started rubbing your hands on your jeans. 

Emily noticed how all of them kept their hands on you, as a way of comfort. 

“Unless he was following the bus,” Zoey said.

“He’s too lazy.” You said, “never had energy for thorough shit.” 

“What’s his name? We’re gonna send it to our technical analyst.” Morgan said. 

You nodded and spoke the name you’ve feared for far too long. “Peter Brady, he was born in my home state

“Okay,” Hotch started, “I want all of you to be shadowing the girls, they are not to be left alone, we don’t know how organized this guy is and what he knows.” He looked at Rossi, “we’ll contact Garcia and run through possible people. Do you have anywhere to set up?” 

Ramona began directing them to rooms, then told all of you to get changed and do rehearsals for the tour. 

JJ and Reid sat in during the rehearsals, meanwhile Emily and Morgan helped Hotch and Rossi with going through all the names that Garcia flagged as potentially dangerous. 

Two hours later, Emily was eating dinner, she was planning to eat alone, but then she found you. You were sitting on the floor backstage, by a bunch of wires and such eating your pizza. You were alone. 

“Hey,” Emily said.

“Hi, did Ramona send you because I’m alone?” You asked, smiling slightly. 

“No,” Emily said sitting next to you, “I can recognize when someone needs someone to talk to. Where are your friends?”

“They’re talking to their partners, I insisted they do. They haven’t been the past couple of nights because of all this. Part of being….’famous’ is that you have to leave your loved ones for long periods of time.” “My field is the same way. I don’t see my mom more than twice a year.” 

You shuddered, “I can barely handle not seeing my mom as much as I used to before ‘fame’. I can’t imagine it in your shoes.” You sighed. 

Emily popped open her salad box, “do you mind if I eat with you?” She smiled.

And she smiled wider when you smiled back, “feel free. By the way, I’m sorry about snapping at you. It’s been rough.” 

“I know how you feel.” Emily would tell you about Doyle if it helped you open up more about this guy.

“Have you been stalked?” 

Emily nodded, “by an abusive ex.” Was all she said. 

You grimaced, “so we’ve gone through similar things.” “Was this guy an ex?” You shook your head, “we were thirteen and fourteen, as kids navigating those feelings can be hard. I’d say we were close to dating then he...he pushed too far. I wasn’t raped, but he touched me inappropriately, then harassed me over text. Then continued for three years, he’s been silent ever since and now all of a sudden 12 years later he’s back.” You laughed bitterly, “and I have no doubts he’s done things to other women. Do you think because I didn’t report, it’s my fault that this is happening? And he’s most likely doing this to other women?” You asked her.

Emily shook her head, “It’s not your fault Y/N, it never will be. He’s a sick creep, and we’re gonna get him.” She assured you. “Can we talk about something else?” You asked. 

“Sure.” Emily smiled.

You felt your heart stutter. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Over the next few days, you and Emily had fallen into a routine. 

You ate all your meals together. Breakfast at 6am in the hotel lobby, lunch in the dance rehearsal room, dinner in the backstage area. 

Of course, your friends teased you relentlessly. And her team teased her relentlessly. 

But you two didn’t care, you found solitude in each other's company, considering both of your worlds were hectic and crazy. 

You two were eating chicken tenders for lunch before vocal and dance rehearsal in the dance room when Marcus walked in, “hey, some fanmail was left for you.” He handed you a blue box. 

“I’m surprised you can bring it to me.” You said grabbing it. 

“It went through security first.”

That was a good sign, you opened it and saw a diamond necklace, “holy shit.” You murmured, it was stunning and sparkly. 

Emily thought it described you personally. 

You took it out of the box and set the box on the ground. Emily saw a tag in the box. She grabbed it. She pulled it and it revealed a bigger note. She picked it up and read it. 

“Y/N….” Emily started. 

“What?” You asked, scared. 

Emily cleared her throat, “for you my love, it matches your smile. Remember that night under the stars at that restaurant our parents took us to as kids? It’s one of my fondest memories.” You dropped the necklace as if it had burned you. 

It had. 

It clattered against the floor, you shot off the ground. “Get it away from me! Get the box away from me! Get it all away!” You started crying. “No, no, no, no.” 

“Go get my team, now!” She ordered Marcus who ran off with his concern and protectiveness in his eyes. 

She approached you, “can I touch you?” She asked. 

You fell into her arms, “he found me. He actually fucking found a way to torment me. After all these years, I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. Please don’t let him get me.” You sobbed into her arms. 

She looked at the diamonds on the ground, the sparkling contrasted against the dull gray floor, she stroked your hair as she said, “I won’t, he will never touch you again.” 

And she would die to ensure that that promise was kept. 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two hours later, you were in vocal rehearsals. You had to do questioning as well as calm down from your panic attack. 

You would only allow Emily near you. 

You two walked side by side to vocal rehearsals, the girls immediately rushed to hug you. Emily stepped back as the three of them hugged you. It was a huge group hug. 

“Oh sweetheart.” Brooke said and kissed your head. “Baby, we tried to get in there but they wouldn’t let us.” Zoey said, “I almost kicked that damn door down but Ramona pulled me away.” 

“We got you, that bastard isn’t going anywhere near you,” Liz declared. 

Emily heard a sniffle from you, and the girls all “aww’d.” 

“Babyyy.” Liz cooed as they all held you tighter. 

After about three minutes of you trying to calm down, you four separated, all of you were wiping your eyes. “God, we really do feed off each other huh?” You tried to lighten the mood. They all smiled, trying to keep the light mood going. 

They all said hi to Emily, then headed towards a couch. You four then sat down and began singing.

Okay, she had heard your records, after all your band was one of the biggest bands in the world, the biggest girl group. 

But God, she did not expect you to not have an auto-tuned voice. None of you do. All four of you have amazing voices but yours…

It was rich like dark chocolate, she wanted to hear you sing all. the. time. It was like a siren, captivating and lustful. You were calm while singing, nobody would know that your stalker had just dropped off a box with diamonds in it two hours ago. 

Then to make you laugh Zoey broke out with an off key note and made you burst out laughing. 

That laugh warmed Emily, she realized how much she loved your company and what she would do to make you laugh like that at her. 

Oh God, she was falling for you. And she was falling hard.

Shit.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two hours before the show was supposed to go on, they caught him. 

He was staking out before the show, Garcia had his picture sent to all the guards and they found him. 

Everyone else went to question him, while Emily stayed with you. It was a few minutes before showtime, makeup artists and hair stylists were doing final touches. As well as the stylists. 

“Twitters blowing up.” Ramona said from her chair.

“About?” You asked, jumping to shake the nerves.

“The guy who got arrested in front of the venue.” 

You looked at Emily, “dear god.” 

“JJ will handle it.” She assured you all.

“Good.” Zoey said. 

You nodded to a corner at Emily, she nodded and followed you over. “I just wanna say, thank you for helping me and spending time with me. I know it’s your job but,” you sighed, “if you’d allow me, I’d like to take you out on a date when we have a show in DC. We’re staying for a couple days doing press and I’d like to go out on a date with you, if you’d like?” Emily smiled and blushed hard, “I would be honored, Y/N.” 

The smile you had could light up the night sky, “thank you, Emily. You won’t regret it.” 

“Ramona called, “Y/N! Show time!” 

“One sec!” Then shoved a piece of paper into her hand, “I hope to hear from you.” Then you kissed her cheek and ran off to stage. 

She opened the piece of paper, “to my hero, I hope to hear from you.” Then underneath was your number. 

She sighed happily, then went to find her seat in the stadium so she could watch her siren queen perform.

[pearl-blue-musings]

Perchance to Meet  Aizawa Shouta x fem!Reader

Hi again! So this idea has been flowing and living in my head rent free for awhile so I thought I’d write out what I’ve been mulling over! This may possibly be a series cause I’ve got lots of the story played out in my mind

A/n: if my timeline is correct, this occurs a bit before the main story so like whole class 1-A is still in middle schoolish; it’s not 18+ now but it will be muahahahaha

Warnings: mentions of alcohol

Part 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He wasn’t sure what compelled him to join his coworkers for night out but here is. It might have been the constant pestering he got from his long time friend Hizashi and newer friend Nemuri. However he can’t complain now because he, Aizawa Shouta, was out at lesser known club wondering just what the hell he was getting himself into.

To say that this wasn’t his scene is an understatement. Did he really want to be spending his night off around a bunch of sweaty and drunk people? Of course not; he’s immediately regretting not bringing his sleeping bag to at least make himself more comfortable. The loud and banging bass of the music rumbles throughout his body as his two companions return to their booth after a bit of dancing.

“Aw come on Shouta! We’re here to have fun! Let loose, and vibe with the music ya dig?”

Aizawa gives the blond a glare that would scare children into submission. Hizashi doesn’t give up at getting his friend to lighten up and enjoy himself and smiling broadly. He continues to poke Aizawa’s shoulder to get him up on the dance floor.

“Not on your life.”

“At least get a drink! There’s a real cute and groovy listener that’s serving drinks and she’s amazing at what she does,” he yells over the music. “Trust me!” He drawls out that last word to let him know that his inebriated state had hit him hard. Aizawa rolls his eyes and succumbs to his friends wishes as he slowly makes his way out of the booth to head over to the main bar. He’s thankful for deciding to put his hair in a low ponytail as he feels the humidity of the club around him while he weaves his way thorugh the crowd. As he approaches the bar, he spots Nemuri. Her sapphire eyes dance under the flashing and changing lights as she takes a stranger toward some stairs near the back. She’s always up to something, he muses to himself. 

Once at the bar, he manages to find an empty stool in a corner and props himself up onto it. Now that he’s here, he didn’t think to ask Hizashi what this person looked like. Oh well, at least he’ll get another drink to make this night more bearable. His eyes glance over the liquors and sprits on the shelves behind the bartenders as he contemplates what he wants to order.

“You know, staring at the shelves won’t make your decision any easier.”

Aizawa is brought out of his thoughts as he follows the voice to its owner. He blinks a couple of times to make sure he’s seeing what he’s seeing. (E/c) irises bore into his and the smile that dances on her lips almost made him lose his composure.

Almost.

“Well then,” he responds, “what would you recommend?”

The bartender scans his being and lightly places her hand on his. Black eyebrows furrow in confusion but she calmly tells him it’ll be okay and to give her a second. Her eyes slightly change color as she holds his hand and stares into his with an intensity he’s never gotten from any random stranger. As soon as she lets go he’s missing her touch already. Weird.

“You’re here for your friends and you just want to be able to relax or even better go home and snuggle in, I’m assuming your bed or sleeping bag, am I right?”

She giggles softly at his taken aback face. She takes his silence as a means to continue. “Judging from that, you’re not too particular about liquors but you don’t want anything too sweet. So I’ll make you a whiskey on the rocks and an Old Fashioned. How does that sound?” 

The slender built man feels like he has to physically shut his jaw at this bartenders analysis of him. Just how the hell did she do that? And how did she know that’s exactly what he goes to when he’s undecided? 

At the sound of glassware being placed in front of him, Aizawa moves to get his wallet to pay. He meets her gaze and she shakes her head. “On the house, but I have one condition.” His eyebrow lifts in surprise.

“Oh? And what is that?”

“That you stay here and keep me company.”

It was strange. Hizashi hadn’t come to check on him since he left their booth almost 30 minutes ago and he hadn’t realized how long time had passed talking with the bartender. It was also strange how the atmosphere of the club blurred into the background the more he chatted with this person. Aizawa found out that her name is (Y/n) (L/n) and she has a mind quirk. She’s able to understand and know what people, or in her case customers, are feeling and how to make them feel better whether it be a drink, a book, the right words to say... She noted to him that she always had a need to help people feel better but didn’t want to be a hero, saying she wanted to help in more simple ways.

“I think that’s very heroic in its own way,” he states after taking a sip from his second whiskey on the rocks. “It’s admirable that you want to help others no matter what.”

(Y/n) laughs at that sadly as she makes another patrons drink. It’s incredible how the 20 something is able to hold a conversation with him and serve others at the same time. However, Aizawa picked up on something the more he saw her hands work. When she returns her (e/c) eyes look downcast. “Yeah I guess,” she sighs, “I mean don’t get me wrong I love working here but my real love is books.”

Aizawa gulps down the rest of his drink, “Books?”

The hero doesn’t miss the way her eyes light up at the mention of books, almost like he had been talking to the shell that was (Y/n) this whole time. “I own my own bookstore. It’s small but I’m hoping to expand; that’s why I picked up hours here at the club. Aizawa-san, the rush I get when someone wants to discover more about themselves through books and being able to provide that to someone,” she breathes to catch her breath, “is a feeling I can never get tired of.” 

Her (h/c) hair whisks away as another customer comes up and asks for a drink and again he notices it. She didn’t grab their hand or stare into their souls. Why only him?

She returns and proceeds to take his empty glasses and cleans them. As she’s drying them he promptly asks, “Why didn’t you use your quirk on those other customers? Why only me?”

Aizawa doesn’t miss the way her eyebrows raise and her shoulders drop. She deeply sighs and finishes drying the drink-ware. “I don’t like to use it all the time. It’s gotten me in trouble and it can be tiring so I only save it for my bookstore and particular occasions.” 

“So what’s so special about me?”

“You looked like you could use a pick me up.”

He snickered at her observant ways as she presses on. “I’ve gotten really good and understanding people, even without my quirk. Many people know what they want to drink at a bar or even a bookstore. But sometimes you can tell that people want something more or something different and that’s where I come in to help.”

At this point, he can’t help but openly stare at the gorgeous woman in front of him. There was something about her presence, something about her aura that he couldn’t quite put his finger on. Maybe it was the alcohol in his system, maybe it was the music, maybe it was him still reeling from the news of All Might joining his school, or maybe...

Maybe it was just her.

Everything about her was shrouded in mystery but also familiarity and calmness. He didn’t know how long he was staring at her until she was staring back asking if he was okay. He caught himself and quickly apologized as she searched for his phone.  A grunt left his lips as he saw the frantic texts from Hizashi and one from Nemuri telling them both that she had her own ride home. As soon as he was about to respond he felt two strong hands on his shuolder.

“Shouta! I’ve been looking for ya buddy! I thought you left, which wouldn’t have surprised me but here you are!”

The calmer friend had removed his fingers from his ears to compensate for the vocal hero’s yelling. A small, yet brief, smile adorns his face as Aizawa is reunited with his friend. 

“Anyways, I was thinking that it’s about time to head out since it’s nearing 1:30 in the morning!”

“Ah, sounds good.” Aizawa hums to him and turns his attention to the bar, only to see her being bombarded with customers as last call is nearing in the club. Their eyes meet briefly and he points his head toward the door indicating that he plans to head out. Somehow she understands and quickly wraps up her remaining customers to return to their corner. He feels Hizashi pull on his shirt and he tells him to wait a few minutes which garners an exasperated sigh from thie blond man.

However as the bartender returns, the blond understands and smiles wickedly. He tries to keep his excitement to himself but he wants to let it flow and tell everyone in the club that his dear friend, Aizawa Shouta, was having a very long conversation with a woman! At a club! That he didn’t want to go to! So he does what any good best friend does and eavesdrops while keeping a safe distance.

(Y/n) props her elbow on the bar and gives her attention to he black haired male who’s had it the whole night. She doesn’t want to come off as weird but she had noticed him when he first entered. Of course she would recognize the underground pro-hero Eraserhead and his friends from U.A. Present Mic and Midnight. She’d be an idiot to not know who they were. She had a hunch that they didn’t want their hero status exposed tonight she she had asked the staff to keep themselves neutral as they saw them throughout the club. She can understand the need to get away and let loose, but she didn’t peg Aizawa as the type to go out to places like this. If she’s being honest, she’s incredibly happy he came here because it was the first time in a long time she felt truly comfortable around someone. It made her elated, but also scared at the same time.

“I’m guessing you’re heading out?”

Aizawa simply nods and pulls out his wallet again. “I told you it’s on the house-”

“At least let me pay for half, Kitty, I had a few while I was here.”

Both parties freeze at the use of the pet name. (S/c) cheeks start to heat up and change color as she felt her heartbeat start to race. The man in front of her had a slight pink tint to his ears but was able to recover quickly. “Ah, y-yeah sure. I’ll ring you up.”

He doesn’t miss the way a bolt of electricity flowed through them as their fingers grazed each other as he handed her his card. When she returned with his receipt he noticed an extra card underneath his. It was a business card for what seems to be a bookstore with an address, hours, and phone number on it. His eyes meet hers in an almost homely way.

“I really liked talking to you Aizawa-san. I’d, uh, really like it if you visited me in the daylight.”

He takes the card and places it securely in his wallet and gives her the most heartfelt smile she’s ever seen.

“I’d like that very much, (L/n).”

BONUS

“I told you she was super cute!”

“Shut it”

“So that’s where you went for almost two hours! I mean I’m glad you and Nemuri had a great night while I was being bombarded with fans! By the way thanks for saving me regardless of how much I texted you but you were busy getting some,” he pauses and wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, “you know a phone number.”

“It’s not too late to end our friendship.”

“Zawa!! So mean!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@whats-her-quirk @kiribaku-queen @ghoularaki @cupidcreates @cupcake-rogue @myherowritings @prk-pyo

[kurts-still-here]

SongFic #3 Of The “Kurtbastian Singing Adam Lambert” series. “Sure Fire Winners”

This one is just Sebastian and Kurt having fun and being sexy together 😎😎. Songfic #4 will be up in a few days most likely but I hope you enjoy!!

Please leave any comments you have etheir on here or on A03 or FanFiction.Net !! 😁😁🤗🤗 Thank you!!

Archive Of Our Own: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32874553

FanFiction.Net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13927358/3/Kurtbastian-Singing-Adam-Lambert (Chapter 3)

“We are so going to win this,” Kurt exclaimed as he walked out of the bathroom stall and looked at his outfit in the mirror. He was wearing a black leather jacket, a skintight black shirt, black leather pants and black, knee-high laced up boots. He had on sunglasses even though it was indoors and his hair was spiked up with hair gel. He had drawn a star on his cheek and had blue and purple glitter on his face along with guyliner.

“Well they might as well just give it to us now with the way we look,” Sebastian said, walking out of his stall and up to Kurt. Him and Kurt were matching except Sebastian wasn’t wearing the laced-up boots. He looked his boyfriend up and down and smiled. “We look hot.”

“I know we do babe,” Kurt said, kissing him on the cheek. “And our performance is going to be even better, I know it.”

“Yeah well we better get going, don’t want to keep everyone waiting. Do you think Mr. Schue and Artie have everything set up?” Sebastian asked. They had asked Mr. Schue if they could have some special effects and props for their performance and their teacher had happily agreed.

“I don’t know,” Kurt said, taking out his phone. “I’ll text Artie and ask him.”

The week’s assignment in the glee club was to sing a song about victory and Kurt and Sebastian had admittedly known the perfect song for them to sing. It was upbeat and full of energy. The assignment was a competition and whatever group won got the duet at Sectionals. Sebastian didn’t really care about winning since he had been the lead soloist for the Warblers and had sung solos at the competitions but he knew that Kurt wasn’t as lucky as him even if he was the most talented performer in the group. He knew how much a duet would mean for Kurt so they went all out with costumes, make-up, special effects and props. They also came up with matching choreography and Sebastian had to say that it was the most work and effort he had ever put into anything. But it was all worth it because he knew they were going to win and he really wanted that duet for Kurt. His boyfriend deserved it.

Kurt had told him about the glee club’s duet competition last year and about how he ended up singing a duet by himself because Finn didn’t want him to sing with Sam. It had just hurt Kurt even more when Sam and Quinn had won the competition and Kurt had told him that even though he loved singing “Le Jazz Hot” that he was glad he had a partner this year. Sebastian had seen the video of Kurt’s performance and thought that Kurt would be the only person in the world who could pull off singing a duet as a solo.

His costume was so creative and so was the background he had designed. He had also designed costumes for the Cheerios he had paid to act as background dancers for him and the choreography was stunning. Sebastian thought that he should’ve won but Kurt told him that Finn and Rachel were acting fishy the whole time so they probably had something to do with Sam and Quinn’s win. Not that they didn’t deserve to win but even Santana and Mercedes’ performance of “River Deep, Mountain High'' was mind blowing. Kurt didn’t care about winning so much as having someone to sing with and made a joke saying that he may be able to sing a duet by himself but that he didn’t want to have dinner by himself. But last year didn’t matter anymore because this year they were going to win a duet at Sectionals and not some stupid dinner at a cheap restaurant when Sebastian could easily pay for his own date and could take Kurt to a 5-star restaurant.

Plus this time the group couldn’t vote for themselves so as long as they blew it out of the park then they were for sure the winners. They were the last to go this week seeing that they had spent so long preparing themselves and that they had just finished up their performance the previous day. Brittany and Santana had sung “Try Everything” by Shakira, Finn and Rachel had sung “The Climb” by Miley Cyrus, Sam and Puck had sung “Victorious” by Panic! At The Disco, Tina, Mercedes and Quinn had sung “Shake It Off” by Taylor Swift as a trio and Mike and Artie had sung “On Top Of The World” by Imagine Dragons. All the performances were good but Sebastian thought that the only competition they really had was against Sam and Puck since they had picked a song similar to theirs, the only difference was they didn’t put in the extra effort. They had it in the bag.

“He says they're ready,” Kurt squealed. “Oh, I’m so excited, Seb, just imagine us singing a duet at Sectionals. Together. It’d be so romantic and fun and we would win the competition for the New Directions.”

“Well you won’t have to imagine much longer. You deserve this more than anyone else Kurt. Don’t go down without a fight, okay?” Sebastian told him. Sebastian thought that sometimes Kurt went too easy on his friends and let them push him to the side when Kurt was a star. He needed to stand up for himself more and go after what he wanted.

“I won’t, I promise.” Kurt said and grabbed ahold of Sebastian’s hand. “Now let’s go win this duet.” He cheered and they grabbed their stuff before walking out of the bathroom.

They walked to the choir room hand in hand, mentally preparing themselves for their song. They couldn’t help but worry a little too much, especially Kurt. The choreography was a little complicated and it had taken them some time to really nail it down but it would be worth it in the end. It was fast, just like the music and they had to mind the spacing in the choir room also.

Once they reached the choir room they stood outside of the doors, Kurt to the right and Sebastian to the left. They were planning to come into the room when the music started to surprise everyone and to add an effect. They would storm into the room, grabbing everyone’s attention and the lights and the costumes and the choreography and the singing would be a crowd pleaser.

“Okay, why am I so nervous?” Kurt asked, pacing back and forth, fidgeting with his hands.

“I don’t know, why are you?” Sebastian asked. Kurt had no reason to be nervous right now. He was amazing and he could and would pull this off. “Hey, look at me babe,” He told Kurt and took his hands to hold them. “We’re going to win this and we're going to perform at Sectionals. Don’t worry about it, you’re going to psych yourself out.”

“I know,” Kurt nodded. “I just… things are never certain and I really want this Seb. It’s my last Sectionals and I want it to be really special.”

“I know you do and I want this for you too so just calm down, focus, breathe and get your head in the game.”

“I will,” Kurt said, doing what Sebastian told him to do and taking a deep breath. “Artie says that he’ll text me when they're ready inside but the band is still setting up.”

Sebastian nodded and gave Kurt a kiss before going back to the other door to the choir room. Inside everyone was talking to each other about the setup of the room.

“Of course this is for Lady Hummel and Fivel, gays always go full out,” Santana said, looking around the room.

“Well doesn’t this seem like a little too much?” Rachel asked the group who just shrugged in response. “I mean it’s not like they’re going to win over me and Finn.”

“You know what Man-Hands,” Quinn snapped. “Just for that I’m not voting for you. And The Climb was the worst. How is that about victory?”

“It’s about overcoming obstacles in life. My obstacles being you guys and how hard it is working with people who are less talented than you.” Rachel said, nonchalantly.

“Rachel, babe, you can’t just say things like that.” Finn told her. “It’s not nice. But anyways, this does seem like something Kurt would do. Remember his “duet” last year?”

“You mean the duet he did by himself because your homophobic ass couldn’t handle him singing a song with Sam?” Quinn asked, raising an eyebrow. “I remember and he nailed it. You guys better watch out because now he has Sebastian and we all know how badly he wants a duet.”

“Hey, I wasn’t being homophobic, I was looking out for the team. Sam knows what I’m talking about right dude?” Finn asked Sam who shrugged.

“I don’t know man, some of the shit you said was really offensive. And I was all set to sing with him and then you talked to us and he set me free. I would totally have still done it if it wasn’t for you.” Sam explained, narrowing his eyes at Finn. Sam liked Kurt a lot and they were really close with one another. Sam treated Kurt like he was one of the guys and they had only bonded more when Kurt had helped him out the previous school year with his siblings. He had really wanted to sing with him but then Kurt had let him go and Sam was too worried about his popularity at the time to try and get Kurt to keep their arrangement. Up until now Kurt and Sam had only sung one or two lines together in a group piece and Sam had always thought that maybe he could still see if Kurt wanted to sing with him. He’d have to ask him.

“That’s not what I meant, it’s just…” Finn’s voice trailed off and threw his hands in the air, frustrated. “... you just don’t get it,”

“It doesn’t matter now anyway. Kurt has a partner this time and it’s obvious that he’s in it to win it with Seb,” Tina said. “He should’ve gotten this a long time ago.” She rolled her eyes at Rachel.

“Yeah well he could’ve gotten a solo at Sectionals two years ago if he would’ve hit the high F but he couldn’t despite saying he was able to. It’s not my fault that I have a superior vocal range.” Rachel sneered.

“You know what Berry I’m sick of your shit,” Santana yelled, pointing her finger at Rachel. “Let me give you a little newsflash here. First of all, half the people in this room like Artie, Mercedes and I have a better vocal range than you. Kurt can sing just as good as any of us but no one ever gives him the chance to shine. He can hit that note, he’s hit it several times before right in front of you but you never noticed because your ego’s ten sizes the size it should be. We weren’t going to tell you because we didn’t want to risk you throwing a hissy fit and blabbing your mouth but we already decided that we’re voting for him. He deserves this and he’s the only member of this club that hasn’t had a chance to shine yet. So shut up, suck it up and deal with it you selfish bitch.” Santana fell back in her seat and folded her arms across her stomach as she watched her friends' (and Rachel’s) expressions.

All the girl besides Rachel looked proud of her (and why shouldn't they be), the boys looked surprised and shocked (which they shouldn't be because that wasn’t the first time she had told Berry off) and Finn and Rachel looked like she had just slapped them (and they were lucky that she didn’t because she really wanted to).

The room was silent for a few seconds before Artie and Mr. Schue came out of Mr. Schue’s adjoining office. “Okay everyone, I think we’re all ready to watch our last performance from Kurt and Sebastian. Artie you can get Kurt to tell him that we’re all ready for him.” Artie pulled out his phone to text Kurt while Mr. Schue continued talking. “Now after they are finished we’ll be voting to see who wins the competition and remember, you can’t vote for yourselves this time.”

“Is there even a point in voting?” Rachel muttered and everyone except Finn shot her a death glare.

“Okay, he says that they’re ready,” Artie said. “Let’s start up the smoke and then he says they’ll come in when the music starts playing.”

“Alright then,” Mr. Schue said, going over to the smoke machine and staring it up. “Hit it you guys,” He said, referring to the band who started playing the background music for the song.

“Wait,” Kurt said. “I hear the music,” He told Sebastian. “Ready babe?”

“Born ready babe,” Sebastian assured his boyfriend. “Let’s do this,”

And with that they opened their doors and walked into the choir room like they had planned to. They admittedly started singing while going through the choreography like they planned. The scene was perfect. They were blue and purple lights flashing around the room and Mr. Schue and Artie had properly set up the smoke machine so that the room was misty. Kurt and Sebastian felt like they were at an actual rock concert which got them in the mood for their performance even more.

We're coming up like killing machines

Our big guns gonna shatter your scene

It's pandemonium on the floor

'Cause everybody wants a little more

They wanna ride on the rocket ship

Ride around the moon for a velvet kiss

'Cause all the girls and the boys wanna know

How far this bad wild child's gonna go

Everyone seemed to be enjoying their performance already except for Rachel who had a stony expression on her face and who sat there in her chair with her arms crossed. They kept dancing and Kurt felt a sort of high when he realized that they were hitting the moves exactly like how they had planned. Kurt turned into Sebastian and then Sebastian took his arm and spun him back out. Then they had prepped themselves before going into a roundoff back handspring in the choir room, earning clapping and cheering from their friends.

We are the sure fire winners

Uh-oh yeah big time hitters

We are the sure fire winners

Uh-oh yeah big time hitters

Bringing the heat and the word is out

Giving you something to shout about

We are, yeah, we are, we are the sure fire winners

Sure fire winners, sure fire winners, sure fire winners

They both sang the chorus and walked around the room and interacted with their audience, Sebastian high fived Puck and Sam while Kurt danced with Quinn and Brittany. ‘So far so good’ Kurt thought to himself, excitedly. He was so happy that they seemed happy about him being so extra about the performance and that they seemed to love it. He was just a few minutes away from winning the duet, he could feel the feeling of victory already and the song just pumped him up even more.

Flick the switch and the missile will fire

I'm a heat seeker when I'm full of desire

We're all drawn to the heat of the flame

'Cause you wanna be a star in the hall of fame

I was born with glitter on my face

My baby clothes made of leather and lace

And all the girls in the club wanna know

Where did all their pretty boys go?

The boys went back to the center of the room and Sebastian quickly glanced over to Kurt and was happy to see how into it he was. He was moving along with the music, adding his own pizazz to their dancing. He put his hand on his face and dragged it down his face to emphasize the glitter and then took his jacket off his shoulders slightly, matching with the lyrics. On the last line they stood back to back and sang it together as the audience continued to cheer and holler.

We are the sure fire winners

Uh-oh yeah big time hitters

We are the sure fire winners

Uh-oh yeah big time hitters

Bringing the heat and the word is out

Giving you something to shout about

We are, yeah, we are, we are the sure fire winners

Winners winners

They started singing the chorus again. They stood on opposite sides of the room and swung one leg forward before forcing it back and flipping over into a backflip. Then Kurt slid to the floor in a split and swung his legs forward to spin himself around on the floor. Sebastian walked over to him and took his hand spinning him around in the floor before helping him up off the floor. Kurt stood up gracefully and Sebastian dipped Kurt back. They held the pose as Sebastian took over the lyrics and then Sebastian lowered Kurt down so he could fall into a backbend. He let go as Kurt kicked himself over and then they started singing the bridge.

Ooh yeah, take a walk on the wild with me

Gonna take you to the top to the brink of what you believe

Never gonna stop 'til we reach the top

Never gonna stop 'til we reach the top

You'd better get out of the game it's never gonna be the same

Move over 'cause a new boy's calling it time

They both hit the high note and Kurt had to resist the temptation he had to ditch the choreography and to jump up and down with excitement. They walked around the room, clapping their hands together and the rest of the glee club even Rachel joined in on the clapping. There was no way they weren’t going to win. Everyone was loving them and they were doing amazing. They were on fire, they were pumped up and they were going to finish out strong.

We are the sure fire winners

Uh-oh yeah big time hitters

We are the sure fire winners

Uh-oh yeah big time hitters

Bringing the heat and the word is out

Giving you something to shout about

We are, yeah, we are, we are the sure fire winners

They pumped their fists up in the air as they sang the lyrics. Mercedes, Tina and Quinn were singing the lyrics along with them, Mike, Brittany and Santana were doing their own moves in their seats, Puck, Sam and Artie were pumping their fists along with Kurt and Sebastian and Finn and Rachel were quietly observing the scene but Kurt could tell that they were both impressed with him and his boyfriend.

Ooh yeah yeah-oh yeah yeah yeah

Mr. Schue’s expression was the best though. He seemed shocked with Kurt’s and Sebastian’s dance moves and singing, like he didn’t know they had it in them. There was nothing more that both boys loved more than proving people wrong while also proving themselves.

We are the sure fire winners

Uh-oh yeah big time hitters

We are the sure fire winners

Uh-oh yeah big time hitters

Bringing the heat and the word is out

Giving you something to shout about

Yeah we are, yeah, we are, we are the sure fire winners

Kurt walked over to Sebastian and they stood next to each other as they finished out their dancing, ensign off with a series of complicated footwork. They got it right, matching it up with music and ended their song, posing, back to back again, with their arms crossed and their heads bowed down a little so that their sunglasses slipped down to the bridge of their noses.

Gonna take you to the top to the brink of what you believe

Gonna take you to the top to the brink of what you believe

Gonna take you to the top to the brink of what you believe

The music faded out and they held their pose as they got a standing ovation from their friends. Everyone cheered and clapped for them and Kurt finally gave in to his temptation and jumped up and down, holding hands with Sebastian. They hugged each other and Sebastian lifted Kurt off his feet.

“Wow,” Mr. Schue exclaimed. “That was amazing boys. The costumes, the special effects, the energy, kudos to the both of you.”

“Thank you,” Kurt said, still full of energy. He was so happy at the moment, he wouldn’t even be that upset if they had lost. Of course, they weren’t going to though because they had kicked ass but nothing was written in stone yet.

“What do you say guys?” Mr. Schue asked his students. “Are we ready to vote?”

“Actually Mr. Schue, I don’t think that’s necessary,” Rachel said, standing up. “We all decided that we want Kurt and Sebastian to sing at Sectionals. Kurt really deserves it and I think that his performance with Sebastian just goes to show that even more.” Everyone nodded their heads in agreement and Sebastian squeezed Kurt’s hand. He was getting his duet!

“I couldn’t agree more Rachel,” Mr. Schue said as he turned back to the two boys. “Well, congratulations you two, you won the duet. Start brainstorming some ideas and we'll talk about it tomorrow. Oh, and try to incorporate some of those moves. That’ll guarantee us a win alone. Well done gentleman.”

“We did it Seb,” Kurt said, hugging him again. “We did it. We’re gonna sing at Sectionals. Oh my god.” Everyone laughed at how excited Kurt was and clapped for the boys again.

“I know, I know,” Sebastian told him. “This is great. You did great. You were amazing babe.”

“I couldn’t have done it without you, Seb” Kurt smiled and they kissed each other before going to sit down in their seats. They would have to do this all over again and they both couldn’t wait.

[bangtan-sonyeonddaeng]

Well here it is! The first chapter. This will be a Yoongi x reader fic and a soulmate AU. I am not sure how many chapters or how long it will be. I’m just going to kind of roll with it and see where it goes. This first part is a little short just to kind of introduce the story. I hope you enjoy! 

Summary: Soulmates have different ways of being connected to one another. Sometimes it’s through being able to write on their arms and having it show up on their soulmates. For others it was having their first words spoken to one another permanently tattooed into their skin. You had a unique connection with yours, one that you really hadn’t ever heard of happening before. Whatever song was stuck in your soulmate’s head was also stuck in yours and the same was for them. When Yoongi realizes one of his songs is playing on repeat in your head, he immediately takes to writing songs to communicate with you in hopes it will finally bring you two together.

Genre: Fluff. Just pure tooth rotting, sweet fluff. 

Part 2

“Hyung? Yoongi?…. HYUNG!” Yoongi snapped his gaze to Jimin and blinked his eyes, rapidly trying to clear the confusion that was fogging his brain. It had been like that all day, him finding it difficult to concentrate on much of anything. The music in the studio and the sounds of the members talking just serving as background noise to what was replaying in his head. Yoongi pinches the bridge of his nose and shakes his head back and forth, trying to focus on what is happening around him.

“Huh? Sorry, Jimin. What did you say?”

“It’s your turn to record your rap for the new song.”

“Ah, right…” Yoongi’s sighs and wonders how on earth he is going to be able to focus enough to record when all he has been hearing is Gwen Stefani’s Holla Back Girl on repeat in his head. “This shit is gonna drive me fucking bananas.” Jimin giggles.

“Your soulmate again?”

“Yeah. I really wonder what kind of person they are with their questionable taste in music.”

“If they’re your soulmate then I am sure they are a great person hyung.” Yoongi’s sighs.

“I know. I just wish things were easier you know? You have a connection with your soulmate by whatever you write on your skin showing up on each other so you found one another very easily. I am just kind of stuck hoping someday we will be humming the same song and realize we’re each other’s soulmates.” Jimin can tell he’s feeling discouraged by the way he looks away and sighs for what must be the 10th time in the past minute.

“Hey now. Fate always has a way of bringing us together. I have No Doubt you two will meet each other soon.” Jimin says with a quirk of his eyebrows. Yoongi glowers at him.

“Did you just… I hate you. You’ve been hanging around Jin too much.” Jimin bursts out laughing and shoves Yoongi towards the studio.

“Go record your vocals hyung!”

You glare at your best friend as the moment you two get in the car she starts blaring Gwen Stefani.

“You really like to torture me and my soulmate don’t you?”

“Oh come on y/n it’s hilarious. You two share a connection through the music you listen to. We might as well mess with your soulmate a little bit. I’m sure they have a good sense of humor.”

“It seems like they mostly listen to rap and hip hop though you’re probably torturing the poor thing getting those songs stuck in my head all the time. Can’t we just give them a little break?” Your friend sighs and turns the radio down.

“Okay. Maybe I can play nice today.”

“Thank you.” You sit in silence the rest of the way, listening to just the background noise of the car running along the pavement on your way to the cafe. A new song enters your head, it’s pleasant. A melody and song you’ve never heard before. The voice singing it is deep and raspy and you find that you immediately feel at peace and comforted by the sound.

“Huh.. That’s weird.”

“What is it?”

“I’ve never heard this song before. I’ve never heard this voice before either. It’s nice...Really nice.”

“What are the lyrics saying?”

“To be honest I don’t know.. it’s in another language. Korean it sounds like. Does that mean my soulmate is Korean?”

“Could be! Can you understand any of the words?”

“Something about “That would be my first death… I’ve been always afraid of? There is some English.”

“Well write it down! Maybe you can find out some more information about them.”

“Just based on a song?”

“If it’s new and you’ve never heard it before maybe it’s something they wrote. Maybe your soulmate is an idol or a music producer?” You pull your phone out and write down the English lyrics you are able to pick up on. You enter a search into google but come back with nothing. “I got nothing. And I highly doubt my soulmate would be an idol.”

“Why do you think that?”

“Because there’s just no way!”

“If you start talking badly about yourself I will hit you.” You laugh and offer your friend a small smile.

“No no it’s not like that. I just don’t see how an idol could be my soulmate. That’s just ridiculous. That would be more likely for you since you are such a die hard fan of many groups.”

“I keep telling you to listen to kpop and give it a chance!”

“Well.. maybe now I will.”

“Okay this is weird.”

“What’s weird?”

“It’s quiet… Very quiet. There is no song stuck in my head when usually there is always something. What if something happened to my soulmate?” Yoongi has been pacing around the studio for the last 20 minutes. When the music suddenly stopped he had a moment of panic. Namjoon had come by to try and reason with him, but he wasn’t having it. “What if they’re in a coma? Or what if they fainted and no one is there to help them? What if-“

“Yoongi. Calm down. Maybe they just decided to give you a break from all the songs they have been subjecting you to and are letting you have some quiet time. Isn’t that what you wanted?”

“Well, I wanted them to have different songs stuck in their head but not just complete silence!” Yoongi huffs and flops down on his couch, head lolling back to stare at the ceiling. He closes his eyes and concentrates, trying to hear even some semblance of a melody playing in his head. Namjoon reaches over and pats his thigh.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine, Yoongi. They say if something bad happens to your soulmate your chest will actually ache and it will feel like a piece of you is breaking away. Is your chest hurting?” Yoongi shakes his head.

“Then they’re fine. I promise. You should go home and get some rest. Your comeback trailer is released tomorrow.” Yoongi feels relief wash over him as he sinks into the couch.

“Thank you, Namjoon.”

“Of course. I’m always here for you, never forget that okay?” He walks out of the studio, leaving Yoongi alone with his thoughts. He just wants to meet you already. He’s getting impatient, but he’s stuck. There is nothing more he wants than to finally be able to hug you and hold you tightly in his arms and tell you how much he loves you. It’s weird to him, knowing absolutely nothing about a person, not even their name but feeling like they’re your entire world. 

“Please. Whatever force of fate in the universe is listening. I just want to meet my soulmate soon.” He’s lost in his thoughts for a while longer until a familiar melody starts playing in his head and he immediately bursts out laughing with a fond smile on his face.

“I told you you’d like this song!”

“Okay you were right. It’s amazing. It’s very catchy. Oh gosh it’s gonna be stuck in my head now. I hope my soulmate likes Got7.”

“I’m sure they love them! Who wouldn’t?!”

“Can we listen to more?”

“Of course!”

You spend the afternoon listening to Got7 with your friend. When a new video catches your eye.

“What group is that?”

“Oh? BTS? You’ve heard of them. I showed you their interview before remember?”

“Ah yeah, I remember now. Can we watch a music video of theirs?”

“Of course! Their comeback trailer is tomorrow why don’t we watch it then?”

“But I want to watch them now. That one is really cute.” You say with a slight pout on your face.

“The one with the bandana?”

“Yeah. Who’s he?”

“Ah that’s Min Yoongi! Or his stage name is Suga. It’s actually his comeback trailer that is dropping tomorrow. Which means we have to be up at oh.. 5 in the morning? You need your rest! We can watch more tomorrow.” You huff and flop backwards onto the bed. You lay there for a moment, wondering why you felt something similar to electricity zapping through you just by hearing his name.

“Min Yoongi, huh?” There it is again. Your blood beginning to feel like it’s heating up under your skin. “Well I can’t wait to hear what he has in store tomorrow.”

[cloud9in]

Hazel

Summary: Ava decides that in order to win Hazel’s heart, she’d serenade her outside of her window...in the middle of a snowstorm

Pairing: Ava x Mc (Hazel) (based on the song Hazel by Lloyd) (I recommend listening to it)

Warnings: NONE, just a lot of fluff...and some angst?

Word Count: 2.4k

Permanent Taglist: @samanthadalton @satrinadia I’m also gonna tag some Ava stans: @kamilahsayeet2063 @dopeyouth 

The soles of Ava’s boots softly sink into the powder like snow that had begun plating the ground a few hours ago. It was now midnight. The moon sparkled brightly even through the flurry of snow that poured from the sky. Ava brushes off the thin layer of snowflakes that coated her face, and puffs out a breath of air. She knew that she probably resembled an apple, but that wasn’t the most important thing to think about in the moment.

 The cheerleader stood below Hazel’s window with a black and silver Sony boombox that she borrowed from Mack. Ava had made a mental note to thank her best friend's sister properly, after (hopefully) succeeding with her plan. To be fair, Mackenzie didn’t take it too well when Ava first came to her with the idea.

  ~

 “Why do you want my boombox? There's plenty of ones available for whatever you have planned, which is what by the way?” 

Ava visibly stiffens, her fingers curling into the hem of her plaid skirt as she spoke, “Well...there’s this movie that Hazel and I used to watch...”. Mackenzie rolls her eyes dramatically as she flops onto her bed, “Oh that movie...hm what was it again.” The blue-haired girl strokes her chin thoughtfully before speaking, “oh right ‘Say Anything’.”

 Ava glances at her with a look of surprise, her fingers slowly loosening the hold on her skirt. Mackenzie takes it as a sign to elaborate, “it’s practically all Hazel talks about, she’s drilled it into my brain at this point and now here you are bringing it up again. Can I ever catch a break?” She visibly huffs with a hand over her heart before shooting Ava a wink. An awkward silence sits in the room for a moment until Mackenzie sits up in thought, her eyebrows knitting together before speaking, “I thought you two weren’t on speaking terms?” 

 Ava frowns at her words and turns her head to look down the hall at Hazel’s closed door. “Well...yes we aren’t. But I want to apologize to her in a way that is meaningful for the both of us. I think that...this is the perfect way.” The brunette displays a hopeful grin on her face as she looks in Mackenzie’s direction.

 “...You do know that the whole ‘puppy eyes and please look at my charming smile’ thing does not work on me right? I am not my sister”, Mackenzie deadpans.

 “Huh, so it does work on Hazel”, Ava smiles to herself silently as she makes a plan to tease her best friend about it.

  “As a matter of fact...Hazel seems to drop everything and run to you whenever you use that damn look..”. Mackenzie tilts her head to the side and gives Ava a weird look. 

The brunette tries not to fidget in front of the girl. Mack didn’t know of Ava’s attraction to her big sister, and she wanted to keep it that way for now. Ava didn’t want to picture what Mackenzie’s shovel talk would consist of...the girl could be unpredictable.

 “What happened between you guys anyway?”

 Ava moves her gaze down to the floor, contemplating her answer. She couldn’t tell Mackenzie what really happened after the ski trip...

  But the truth is that Hazel and Ava had gotten closer, sharing their first kiss in her car. The cheerleader had dropped her off that night after practice and before she could stop herself, Hazel was pulled back into the car by her arm, and their lips locked. It felt so perfect...Ava never felt that way when kissing Bayla. Her heart sped up every time she caught a glimpse of the girl's pink hair in the halls. There were moments where Ava had to walk away so she wouldn’t make the mistake of tangling her fingers in Hazel’s hair, burying her perfect lips with her own. The only thing stopping her was Bayla. 

Even after the kiss, Ava couldn’t make the decision to fully leave her girlfriend, not until Hazel was sure she knew what she wanted as well. The brunette refused to ruin her own relationship in fear of her best friend picking someone else in the end. 

The two shared glances occasionally but neither one has spoken to each other after a huge argument one day in the locker room. All of those bottled up emotions had spilled in that moment, but it only left a rift too big to seal up with a simple “I’m sorry”. It seems like the best option would be to sit down and talk it all out, but what teenager is capable of such civility? 

Ava breathes out quietly as her mind starts to cloud with thoughts. Why am I still with her? Hazel is the one I want.... No, need. She couldn’t get neither Hazel nor Bayla out of her head. Is this the way her best friend feels about Mason and Noah? 

 She blinks back to reality after a moment and looks up to see Mackenzie staring at her expectantly. “Um...well it's just some school and girlfriend drama”, Ava says nonchalantly, hoping to convince the blue-haired girl otherwise. It's clear that Mack doesn’t fully believe her, but she drops the topic and walks towards her closet, pulling out the shiny new boombox. She hands it over to Ava but not before staring directly into her eyes, “You break my baby and we’re going to have a problem Lawrence.” The brunette gapes at her for a split second and then nods her head carefully. 

Yeah she definitely didn’t want to hear that shovel talk now.

 ~

 Ava smiles at the little memory as she dusts more snowflakes from her face. She looks up at the grey sky and shields her eyes from the falling snow. The light flurry was beginning to accelerate into a storm and the many layers Ava had on wouldn’t be able to protect her for much longer. She had to get a move on, it was now or never. 

Funny that out of any time of the day, Ava had picked during a snowstorm to confess her love to Hazel. Was it love? Ava knew deep down that she was crazy in love with the girl but didn’t want to scare her away. So instead of saying “I love you, be my girlfriend”, the cheerleader decided that bringing a boombox and blasting an old school love song while serenading Hazel from below her window, in a soon to be blizzard... would be the best idea ever. 

She positioned the boombox onto her shoulders before reaching up to hit the play button, a deep yet melodious beat encompassing the air as the singer hummed sweet words 

I'm beginnin' to see

The more we hang together

Baby girl, I like you

'Cause you're better

Ava’s arms shook intensely but it wasn’t because of the weight of the box. A surge of nervousness had fluttered in her stomach and seeped its way into her bones. Is this stupid? Is she even awake? Will she be angry that I woke her up? The brunette had started to doubt her actions as she stood there.  There was no hint of a silhouette behind the transparent curtains in Hazel’s room, and Ava had almost switched the song off until the lights turned on.

 ~

 Hazel had settled under her thick blankets for the night, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep. The fight she had with Ava constantly replayed in her head, but not nearly as much as the kiss did. Hazel still felt the brunette’s lips on hers, the tingling sensation seemed to never go away. She lightly touched her lips and closed her eyes, reliving every touch and feeling Ava had caused that night. Her heart started to beat rapidly, and it was the only thing she could hear before a sudden commotion invaded her thoughts...

 Hey Hazel

I like you

Can't see myself without you

My sweet Hazel

'Cause I think I'm in love (I'm in love)

Hazel’s eyes shot open as she sat up abruptly. Was that my name? She thought to herself as she peered towards the window. Down below she could see a figure standing but the blowing snow made it hard to make out who it was. Hazel steadily slipped out of her covers, immediately wrapping her arms around her abdomen for warmth. She cautiously slipped below the window and squinted her eyes to see the intruder, but to no avail. She couldn’t see who it was, which meant that turning on her bedroom lights was the only option. Hazel sighed to herself before flipping the switch up and creeping back to her spot. What the hell am I doing? She thought again, deciding to stand up and face the man who sang her name shamelessly.

 Except it was no man.

 ...It was Ava

 Hazel does a double take as her jaw drops open at the sight below her. Ava holds a boombox above her head as Lloyd sings his heart out. When the brunette notices Hazel, a gorgeous smile appears on her face, eyes twinkling with delight. They looked like snowflakes themselves and Hazel felt as if she was in trance.

 Ava began to sing along, her voice belting out in the most incredible way possible, as the snow shined heavily behind her. It was the most stunning thing Hazel had ever witnessed.

Can't see myself without you

My sweet Hazel

Girl, I think I'm in love (I'm in love)

She hums the background vocals while never breaking eye contact with the girl above her. It was sensual and Hazel felt her face flood with heat as she covered her mouth. Ava puts the boombox down and points her fingers up at Hazel as she continues the song, whispering her name 

...Hazel

 Hazel...

Lloyd’s vocals croon in the background as the two girls just stare at each other. Ava didn’t fight the urge and allowed herself to sink into the deep pools of honey that were home to Hazel’s face. The light in her room added an extra sparkle to her eyes as she laughed with joy. Hazel was relieved that her dark complexion couldn’t reveal a deep redness that only Ava could cause. Her whole body felt like it was on fire, the cold didn’t bite at her skin anymore. Excitement runs through her veins as she dashes out of her bedroom, down the stairs, out through the front door, and right into Ava’s arms. The cheerleader yelps in surprise as she steadies her hold on Hazel, holding her up midair. She giggles into Hazel’s neck as they hug each other tightly. 

 “Couldn’t resist me eh?”

 Hazel laughs, swatting playfully at Ava’s padded shoulder. She leans in for another hug, enveloping herself in all of the warmth that the brunette provided, despite the chilly air. After a minute of just holding each other, Ava reluctantly pulls away and cups Hazel’s cheek, turning her head to look down at her. “Hazel...I’m really sorry. For everything.”

 The giggles and laughter are put on pause as Ava sets her down. Hazel doesn’t let go of the brunette no matter how much her brain protests to step back. She couldn’t. This is what she desperately craved for ever since she lost her best friend. Now that Ava was back in her arms, Hazel held on tightly, like she feared that history would repeat itself if she let go. This time would be different, this time they were going to talk it out. 

 “Listen Hazel I-”

 She doesn’t let Ava continue, putting a finger against her mouth to shush her.

 “We can talk about it tomorrow..”. Hazel gestures to the white snow blanketing around them, “When we’re not in the middle of a snow storm”, she claims. 

 Ava looks around with her and nods her head in agreement, a small smile playing at her lips. Tomorrow they’d solve this problem, but for now,  Hazel is going to enjoy every last bit of this experience. So many ideas flooded her mind, maybe she’d throw a bunch of snowballs at Ava, or push her into the snow. Maybe she’d just hold her hand and let the snow plummet and build around them.

My sweet Hazel

Girl, I think I'm in love (I'm in love)

She gazes into Ava’s eyes lovingly, pulling her flush against her smaller frame. Hazel watches as small snowflakes trickle down onto the brunette’s rosy cheeks, and leans in to kiss every individual freckle that painted her face. Ava pulls back after a good five kisses and chuckles down at the girl, “you know if you keep that up, we’ll be standing here all night.” 

 Hazel sways gently in her arms, a cheeky smile invading her dark features, “and who says that wasn’t my plan all along…?”

 Ava giggles and swiftly picks up Hazel once more, this time spinning her around in the snowfall. They’re bodies were drenched with the white coating, but they didn’t mind it. Hazel looked up into the sky as she screamed with happiness.

Girl I think I’m in love

I’m in love

I’m in love

Ava peered up at her best friend, the smile on her face looked like a million dollars. She pulls her down into a searing kiss that completely shuts out the blizzard around them. As soon as their lips connected, Ava felt like all was right in the world. She could taste the sweet cherry chapstick that Hazel always wore. God it was even better than last time. 

She gently sucks on Hazel’s lower lip, watching her every gasp and the way her nose scrunches up when she squeezes her eyes shut. God she is so perfect.

 They both eventually pulled back for air, the heat between them seemingly growing hotter and hotter. If they never stopped, the whole neighborhood would be melted of snow. 

 “You know you are my whole world Hazel…” 

 “Just shut up and spin me around again”

The two girls howl with laughter as they collide together in the storm.

...From out of her window, Mackenzie shouts down “KNEW IT!!!”, her fist pumping in the air.

 ...Noah sits on his motorcycle in the storm and watches them kiss, an ache growing in his heart. 

 ...Mason turns back in the direction he came from, refusing to witness the scene before him. The flowers he once held in his hand, now laid peacefully under the blanket of snow.

 ...and Ava’s phone that's lodged into the snow lights up for the third time: 3 missed calls from Bayla.

It rings one more time before going silent.

I’m in love

I’m in love

I’m in love

[there-must-be-a-lock]

Business As Usual

Criminal Minds Rockstar AU! 

Word Count: ~3890

Warnings: Implications of offscreen shenanigans, Reid and JJ being devious little shits, but nothing too wild. 

A/N: Why does this exist? Fuck if I know! Was it a fucking blast to write? Fuck yes it was! The headcanon popped into my brain fully-formed while I was driving home from work one day, @stunudo​ and @rockhoochie​ encouraged me, and here I am. This will, at some point, be tied into the SPN rockstar au that I’ve been dicking around with, but for now it’s just the BAU doing their thing! 

Business As Usual

Talking Family and Feminism With Rock’s Hottest New Band

-

There are already fans lining up outside Terminal 5 when I arrive in the afternoon. It’s the first time Business As Usual will be playing in New York since the release of their sophomore album, Wheels Up, which has become the runaway surprise hit of the summer, largely thanks to the success of the first single, “Revelations.” They’ve gone from critically praised indie darlings to the brink of mainstream stardom, seemingly overnight. 

Band manager David Rossi, for one, isn’t surprised at the sudden attention. 

Rossi is an industry vet with almost four decades of experience under his belt. He’d been retired for a couple years when a friend dragged him out to see B.A.U. playing in a dive bar. He says that within two songs, he knew “the kids,” as he calls them, would be huge. By the end of the show, he was ready to come out of retirement if they’d let him manage them. 

With attention comes scrutiny, and for most bands, the rumors would be flying already. However, B.A.U. definitely isn’t most bands; there are no whispers of groupies, crazy parties, or other rockstar antics here. When you meet them face to face, that reputation makes perfect sense. They’re quiet and quirky, and they seem like five of the unlikeliest rock stars in modern music. 

-

“Very nice to meet you, Paul,” Rossi says, turning on the charm. This one’s gonna be a piece of cake. “Now. Before we get any further, just a couple things.” 

He gives the reporter his best fuck with my kids and I will fuck you up look and makes sure the guy looks suitably intimidated before he continues. 

“First, don’t believe half of what comes out of Penelope’s mouth, at least not until you confirm with somebody else. She likes to see what ridiculous things journalists will print.” This is, obviously, a lie, but they’ve found it’s the best way to deal with Penelope’s inability to keep anything private. “Trust me. You listen to her, you’ll end up with egg on your face.” 

“No problem,” Paul says obediently. 

“Second, you do not mention Reid’s stalker. Is that clear?” 

Paul nods, but Rossi waits for a moment, until he starts wilting slightly under the stare.

“I understand,” he says, nodding emphatically, and Rossi gives him a clap on the shoulder and a big smile. 

“Wonderful. Other than that, we’re an open book. Come in, they’re just getting ready for soundcheck. Let’s get you something to drink.” 

-

Officially, the band is made up of Emily Prentiss (vocals), Derek Morgan (guitar), Jennifer “JJ” Jareau (bass), Spencer Reid (keys), and Aaron Hotchner (drums). At first glance, they don’t look like they have anything in common; most bands tend to dress in a similar style and come from similar musical backgrounds, but these five couldn’t be more different. Reid, for example, was a classical piano prodigy who graduated from Berklee at the age of seventeen, and has a tendency to dress like an absentminded professor, while Prentiss, with her Siouxsie Sioux eyeliner, dropped out of prep school to tour with a riot-girl band. 

Producer and sound tech Penelope Garcia is the unofficial sixth member of the band, and they all credit her with melding their various eclectic songwriting styles into one distinctive, experimental sound. 

Garcia is an anomaly in a male-dominated field, possibly even more so than Prentiss and Jareau, but instead of trying to blend in or prove that she’s tough enough to fit in with the rest of the crew, she makes a point to stand out. During sound check, she’s wearing a wildly colorful dress and pink heels, which match the pink streaks in her hair and her thick pink-framed glasses. When I ask whether she deals with sexism in the music industry, she just laughs. 

 “Of course there are jerks,” she says, shrugging. “There are always going to be jerks. But I know I’m good at what I do, and my band knows I’m good at what I do, and that’s what matters.” 

“And the other women? Do they get heckled or catcalled a lot?” 

“The only person who’s allowed to objectify my band is me,” Garcia says cheerfully, and then makes a face. “Kidding! I would never.”  

-

“Nicely done on that solo, hot stuff, you play that guitar almost as well as you fill out those jeans,” Penelope says into the dead mic. It goes directly to the band’s in-ear monitors, so nobody else can hear. Derek laughs and the rest of the band roll their eyes.

When they set up the extra mics and the band-to-booth-only channel, this was not what they had in mind (as Rossi keeps reminding her) but… it’s so much fun. She hasn’t made Derek crack up mid-show yet, but she’ll get there. 

“One of these days you’re gonna use the wrong channel and the entire house is gonna hear you,” JJ says into her own second mic, but she’s grinning too. 

“Let ‘em listen, they’d just be jealous,” Penelope says breezily. “Another one?” 

“Can we run ‘Eviler Twin’ with the new bridge?” Spencer asks. 

Penelope adjusts levels on his synths and shoots him a thumbs up. “You got it, Boy Wonder. Hotch, count ‘em in.” 

-

Lead singer Emily Prentiss has a larger-than-life presence from the moment she steps onstage. She’s commanding and confident, and it’s hard to take your eyes off of her, whether she’s crowdsurfing, jumping around the stage, or delivering one of her trademark fiery speeches between songs. 

When Prentiss first expressed an interest in singing, her mother hired a private vocal coach who specialized in opera, and was disappointed when her daughter showed interest in less classical genres. 

“She was pissed,” Prentiss says, smiling to herself. “I started sneaking out when I was fourteen or so and going to this one little local dive bar that got all the punk and hardcore bands. I’m still not sure how I convinced them to let me in. But seeing the Dead Kennedys made me decide I was going to be in a band. I just looked at Jello Biafra and thought, I want to do that.”  

While their music isn’t explicitly political, the band themselves aren’t shy about expressing their opinions, Prentiss in particular. 

-

“...and that’s why I never wear a bra,” Emily finishes. “Does that answer your question?” 

“I think so?” Paul says hesitantly. He’s making a noble effort not to look down at her tits. 

Emily’s pretty sure it doesn’t answer the question, not even a little bit, but she’s also pretty sure the question was about relationships, so. Fuck that question. 

Emily’s not great at press, but she is excellent at rambling about the patriarchy until people tune her out. 

-

Drummer Aaron Hotchner, best known as “Hotch,” has become the unlikely sex symbol of the band, despite being the only one who’s happily married. The attention only seems to embarrass him. 

“It’s real fun to read him thirst tweets and watch him turn colors,” Penelope says, with a devilish grin. “But you didn’t hear it from me.” 

When Hotch goes out to greet fans after the show, the female shrieks reach a deafening pitch. He greets everyone with a charming, dimpled smile and talks to each one as if there’s no one else waiting for his attention. The crowd is sizeable and some of the fans are overfamiliar, to put it mildly, but Hotch spends over an hour there, speaking to everyone individually. He remains unfailingly polite, taking pictures and signing things even after the rest of his bandmates have excused themselves for the night. 

“He’s just the sweetest,” one girl sighs to her friend as they finally head home. 

Hotch, who is notoriously unenthusiastic about talking to the press, did not want to comment. 

-

“Love you too, Jack. Take care of your mom,” Hotch is saying, as he walks through the green room door. He hangs up, and Emily can see the moment he notices Paul; his smile vanishes and his eyebrows flatten in a scowl. 

“Was that your son?” Paul asks politely. 

“Yes.” 

“How is he?” 

“Fine.” 

Paul’s smile falters for a second. “Do you talk to them every night, when you’re on the road? Touring must be tough.” 

Hotch just gives him a curt nod this time and Emily winces. Paul clears his throat. 

“So… you used to play in a grunge band, is that right?” he asks tentatively. 

Hotch gives him another stony look. “That is correct.” 

JJ opens the door, and Emily can’t help but mutter, “Oh thank fuck.” 

JJ looks between Hotch, who is holding eye contact without blinking, and a petrified Paul. Then she quirks an eyebrow at Emily, who gives her a panicked nod. 

“Hi there, you must be Paul,” JJ says warmly. She jabs Hotch discreetly in the side as she passes him. “Rossi and Morgan are getting food, Hotch, they said you should join them.” 

He looks like he’s about to protest, but Emily shoots him a look and he heads for the door. 

JJ sits next to Paul with a dazzlingly bright smile, eyelashes fluttering. “It is so nice to meet you. Reid and Garcia are in the batcave, I’m happy to take you out there, but I’m all yours if there’s anything you’d like to ask me about first.” 

Emily shoots her a thumbs-up and escapes before Paul notices. 

-

Jennifer Jareau, better known as “JJ,” has the sort of wholesome, all-American beauty that turns heads wherever she goes; she wouldn’t look out of place on a magazine cover. In fact, modeling was what led her indirectly to the band. 

JJ started playing music in her high school marching band, but never intended to pursue it seriously. She was the valedictorian of her small town’s high school and had a full scholarship to the University of Pittsburgh. Between her sophomore and junior years, though, she was spotted by a modeling agency and offered a job; it would just be one week, in Los Angeles. She says she was most excited about the opportunity to fly in an airplane for the first time. 

While in L.A., JJ met Prentiss, and the rest is history. The two women seem to work seamlessly together and frequently complete each others’ sentences, but while Prentiss is commanding and confident, JJ is soft-spoken and feminine, almost motherly. 

-

“I always wanted a family,” JJ says, with her most heartfelt Colgate-ad smile. “It ended up looking a little different than I expected, but here we are.” 

JJ’s 95% sure that’ll be the pull quote for the article. Men like Paul eat that traditional shit up with a spoon; she should probably rein it in before he jizzes himself. 

-

The “batcave,” as they call it, is so full of gear and recording equipment that I stand in the doorway while I talk to Reid and Garcia. Her desk takes up a third of the room, and it holds two laptops in addition to several sound boards and microphones. She’s putting together a rough demo of a song they started working on a couple days earlier. 

Reid, meanwhile, is sitting on the floor, surrounded by the disassembled parts of two amps, and he’s tinkering with something tiny and delicate-looking. When I ask what he’s doing, he rattles off a rapid-fire string of technical jargon, and I have to ask him to repeat himself. He looks to Garcia, who holds up her hands as if to say ‘don’t look at me,’ and Reid turns back to me to say, simply, “I’m making it sound better.” 

Reid has a tendency to speak at three times the speed of most humans, and frequently goes off on baffling tangents about everything from obscure composers to beekeeping to the origins of Halloween. It’s hard to follow, sometimes, but his bandmates seem used to it. 

When asked if anything has changed with the band’s recent success, he says thoughtfully, “I honestly haven’t noticed. None of it makes a difference to me, as long as I get to play music.” He pauses for a moment, then adds with a smile, “My high school reunion last month was very satisfying, though.” 

-

“... William Onyeabor, of course! Lately, also, a lot of Philip Glass and Gil Scott-Heron.” 

Spencer realizes he’s been staring up at the ceiling instead of talking to the reporter. He blinks and refocuses. Paul looks slightly shell-shocked. 

“So to answer your question, yes, we do spend a lot of time writing when we’re on the road,” Garcia interjects. Spencer winces. “We’ll probably have almost an album’s worth of demos by the time the tour is over. We could stay in here all day, the trick is getting Reid to remember to eat.” 

Spencer rolls his eyes. 

“So is that how you guys spend most of your spare time? Writing and playing music?” Paul asks. 

“Well, it’s not like we’re total shut-ins,” Garcia says. “We go out and have fun too. Admittedly, JJ and Emily’s idea of fun is starting bar fights, but -”

“Really?” Paul asks, looking at Spencer curiously. 

He scoffs. “No, she’s kidding.” 

Garcia, absorbed in whatever she’s doing on her laptop, continues absent-mindedly: “Well, it’s not that they start fights, but they both do Krav Maga and also attract a lot of idiots, so… idiots start bar fights and then the girls finish them. Let me tell you, you do not want to mess with JJ.” 

Paul looks at Spencer again. He shakes his head quickly. 

“I mean, can you really picture JJ in a bar fight?” he asks, forcing a laugh. 

Garcia’s still rambling. “Honestly though you really gotta watch out for this one right here. Reid’s our resident wild child.”  

He gives Paul a disarming, wide-eyed, ‘who, me?’ smile and shakes his head again. 

“Oh, man, one time in Boston he -” 

“Garcia,” Spencer interrupts. She looks up, glances at the tape recorder in Paul’s hand, and shuts her mouth hastily. Paul is starting to look suspicious.

“Ha! Just kidding,” Garcia says shrilly. “He’s a big ol’ dork, really.” 

Spencer nods earnestly, doing his best puppy eyes. “I spend most of my time reading, honestly. She’s just trying to make me seem cooler.” 

Paul’s expression clears slightly. “That… makes sense.” 

He doesn’t press for details, which is good. The legendary Boston Incident is not something Spencer needs in print. 

-

Derek Morgan learned guitar from his father, a Chicago blues artist, but says that when he began to write his own music, he immediately gravitated to classic rock. He cites Hendrix, the Rolling Stones, and Led Zeppelin as influences, and it’s easy to see that onstage; Morgan has the rakish charm and suggestive swagger to rival the moves of any of his idols. If anyone out of the group were to fit the mold of the traditional rockstar, I’d expect it to be him. 

The truth is much more innocuous. Offstage, he’s a perfect gentleman, respectful and chivalrous to a fault. He doesn’t drink, and he somehow finds time to work out almost every day, even when they’re on the road. 

“Sorry to disappoint, but I’m dead boring,” he says, with a wide grin. “Truth is, none of us really fit into any of the usual boxes. That’s why we get along so well.” 

He says Garcia is his best friend in the group, and I can tell he’s fiercely protective of the band, especially the women. When asked if he’s usually the one looking out for the girls, he laughs. 

“Honestly, they’re not the ones I worry about,” he says. “But sure. We all look out for each other, really.”   

-

The bartender shows up, finally, and slides two glasses over to JJ. She knocks back the shot first. If this dumb hipster keeps slurring at her about how much artistry there is in dubstep, she’s going to need another one very soon. 

“People just don’t get it,” he says, sidling a little closer. JJ steps back. 

“Ben - Ken?” she asks, and the guy pauses, affronted. “I’m sure that’s very interesting, but you should probably know that I’m gay.” 

He raises his eyebrows. “Like, gay gay?” 

“Gayer by the second,” JJ says coolly. 

“How do you know, though?” Ken says, which is a level of douchebag she didn’t actually expect from him. He must be even drunker than he looks. 

JJ gives him a polite smile. “I’m going to go find my friends now.”

“Hey, hang on.” 

He grabs her arm as she turns away. Behind his back she can see Derek heading in their direction. She gives him a little “stand down” wave. 

“Bad idea,” she warns Ken. 

“Oh yeah? What -” 

“Back off,” Emily snaps, appearing at her side. 

Ken looks at them mutinously, and as they turn away, he mutters something that sounds like (but probably isn’t) “Duckin’ bikes.” 

“Say it to my face,” JJ tells him sweetly. “Let’s see how that goes for you.” 

“What are you gonna do about it?” he asks belligerently. 

Emily grabs one of his wrists and twists hard, while JJ gets the other. Ken yelps. 

“Everything okay here?” Derek says from behind him. He’s doing what can only be described as looming in a distinctly menacing way. “I think it’s time for you to head home, buddy.” 

“Shoo,” Emily adds. “Go on. Skedaddle.” 

Ken skedaddles. JJ can’t help but laugh.

“We had it under control,” Emily reassures Derek. 

He frowns. “You sure?”

“Just another one who thought he could cure me with his magic dick,” JJ says with a shrug. “More shots?” 

“No way, uh-uh,” Derek interrupts sternly. “Emily. Come on. You remember what happened last time you tried to outdrink JJ?” 

“It was so much fun until then, though,” JJ chirps. He knows them too well. She exchanges a look with Emily. 

“Hey, have you seen Reid lately?” Emily asks innocently, and while Derek is scanning the crowd and scowling, JJ gestures to the bartender. 

-

Only time will tell whether Business As Usual will continue to grow in popularity, but Rossi seems confident that they’re here to stay. To hear him tell it, he’s met everyone from the Stones to the Strokes (“And I have the scars to prove it!”) and he has an eye for which bands are in it for the long haul. 

He says, “Long-term success isn’t about who’s the most talented musicians or the best performers, although these guys are both. So many bands crash and burn early.” 

“Why is that? What makes you so sure these guys will be different?”

“You hear people blame it on the lifestyle, the drugs, the parties, but truth is, those don’t matter all that much as long as the band is taking care of each other.” He smiles proudly. “These guys, they’ll always have each others’ backs. They’re a team.” 

-

“You about ready to head back to the hotel?” Hotch asks quietly, lining up his shot. “This isn’t going to last much longer.” Sure enough, he sinks the ball neatly and straightens up, giving the table a calculating look. 

“Let me round ‘em up,” Derek says. “Meet you outside in five.” 

“When has it ever taken five minutes to round up this bunch?” Hotch asks wryly. “You have fifteen and then I’m leaving. Shout if you need help.” 

He spots Penelope first. She’s in the middle of the dancefloor, dancing with a guy who might as well have cartoon hearts popping out of his eyes. She’s not drunk to the point where she’s doing her signature Shitfaced Shimmy, so she won’t be too hard to wrangle. He catches her eye and taps his wrist, then points to the door, and she shoots him a thumbs up. 

Piece of cake. 

He looks around for Reid next, hoping against hope that the kid hasn’t attracted any crazy tonight. He’s not sure why or how, but Reid has proven more prone to disaster than the rest of the crew combined. If you asked Derek who in the band was most likely to get slapped, get kidnapped, get stabbed (accidentally), lose his shoes on the way back from the bathroom, get fully lost on the way to the bathroom, get hit on by a prostitute, puncture his own foot with a dart, snort something sketchy and end up wired til dawn, or befriend a mob boss, the answer would be Spencer Reid, every damn time. 

He knows this because Reid’s already done most of those things. 

Emily pops up at his side. Her level of sobriety is surprising until Derek notices the smug smile on her face and the phone number Sharpied on her arm. He gives her a fist-bump. 

“Meet you outside,” she says cheerfully. 

This might be even easier than he thought. 

“Hey, Emily,” he calls, and she turns back to look at him. “Have you seen Reid or JJ?” 

“JJ found me a while ago to borrow my swiss army knife,” she says thoughtfully, and then her eyes widen in realization. “She never came back and I haven’t seen Reid. Shit.” 

“Alright, you check outside, look in the alley, I’ll do a sweep around here. If Garcia’s not already outside, call Hotch.” Emily nods curtly and turns toward the door. 

Derek elbows his way around the fringes of the dance floor, scanning the crowd for JJ’s blonde hair, but no luck. He checks a couple of the out-of-the-way nooks and crannies where Reid likes to curl up to pass out, even glances under a couple tables, but there’s no sign of him. He heads for the door that leads to the hallway with the bathrooms. 

He almost runs right into JJ and Reid, who are arm-in-arm as they burst through the door. 

“Oh good,” he says, mildly surprised to see them both upright. Then Reid looks up with big, innocent eyes, sniffing and twitching his nose like a goddamn rabbit, and JJ flaps her hand urgently toward the front of the bar, stepping around Derek without breaking stride.   

“We should go,” she says quickly. “Now.” 

“What did you do?” he groans, shepherding them through the crowd. He can see them exchange a glance. JJ wipes her nose with the back of her sleeve, Emily’s multi-tool still clutched in her fist. 

“We may have rearranged some things,” Spencer mutters. 

“There might be some physics magic brewing,” JJ adds. 

Just as Derek half-shoves them through the front door, he hears a shout from the direction of the bathrooms.

Amazingly, everyone is standing on the sidewalk waiting for them. 

“Double time,” Derek says hurriedly, and they all fall into step. 

“Eight minutes and thirty-seven seconds,” Hotch says, looking at his watch. He holds a hand out to Penelope. “Pay up.” 

“Thing One and Thing Two over there were just stirring up some chaos,” Morgan explains. 

“Do I want to know?” Penelope asks, fishing a twenty out of her purse. “Is this a plausible deniability situation?”  

Emily shakes her head. “I swear, Reid, one of these days I’m going to put a leash on you, and not in a fun sexy way.” 

JJ and Reid are already half a block ahead of the rest of them, arms linked, heads together like they’re plotting again. JJ lets out one of her weird little coke-giggles and Derek can hear Reid chattering about… the Wizard of Oz, for some reason? Whatever. 

Just another day for this weird-ass bunch he calls family. 

[taetaesbaebaepsae]

Sharing Without Sharing

A/N: For the lovely @thiccasswonhoruinedmylife​ because listen this is her dream...please excuse my shitty photoshop I’m learning

Summary: Jimin is meeting your Ateez bias, and when you ask him to get an autograph, he gives you a bigger gift instead.

Warnings: mmf threesome, Jimin being possessive and dominant, lapdances, vaginal sex, protected sex, vaginal fingering, just big oof

Word Count: 3068

It had already been a weird fucking day for Wooyoung before Park Jimin suggests a threesome.

He hadn't expected to be actually training under Jimin when the company suggested a BTS medley choreography for Ateez, so when he shows up for dance practice he's speechless when Park Jimin smiles at him and shakes his hand.

Wooyoung is mute most of practice. While his bandmates are excited and chaotic, Wooyoung is laser focused, determined not to make a single misstep in front of Jimin.

For his part, the elder idol is all smiles and praise, making Wooyoung turn a shade of purple that he can see in the mirrors.

Wooyoung is standing around waiting for his other members to leave so that he can ask Jimin questions without his friends making fun of him, when instead, Jimin approaches him.

Jimin hands him a copy of Answer and a pen.

"Ah, my girlfriend begged me to get an autograph. I didn't want to offend the others but you're her bias." His tone is nonchalant and cheerful, and Wooyoung feels a little less flustered by Jimin's disarming smile.

Wooyoung tries to keep his hands from shaking when he signs it.

When he hands it back Jimin doesn't turn to go, just stands there for a moment, smiling.

"Park Jimin-ssi?" Wooyoung asks hesitantly. "Could I ask you some questions?"

Jimin nods, never losing his smile, and Wooyoung manages to actually engage in a conversation about his dancing and form, his voice getting stronger and more passionate as he speaks.

Jimin answers politely, and after a lull in conversation, raises an eyebrow.

"So you've got this hero worship dancer's crush on me?" Jimin raises an eyebrow.

Wooyoung's brain stutters. Had he been too forward? Was he mad?

"No! I just think you're talented," he mumbles, face flushing.

"My girl thinks you're cute."

Wooyoung just stares at him, shell shocked by the change in tone.

"Uh, I... I'm flattered," he finally manages.

"I think she'd like to meet you."

"Ah, that'd be nice," he says dumbly, and Jimin takes out his phone, showing him a selfie of a pretty, smiling girl on his phone background.

"Pretty," Wooyoung says weakly.

Jimin's smile at that could light up a dark room. He nods, seeming proud. 

"She's beautiful, yeah?" There's an unmistakable fondness in his voice."Do you want to help me with a surprise for her?"

Wooyoung nods eagerly, feeling a bit more comfortable.

Jimin's face breaks into a smile again. "Good. We've never done a threesome before. She'll be so excited," he says nonchalantly and Wooyoung is pretty sure he's in some kind of alternate universe.

"Wh-what?"

Jimin is already at the door, turning back as of expecting Wooyoung to follow him.

"What's wrong? You don't like girls?"

Wooyoung is absolutely sure he's in an alternate universe.

"I...yes, I like girls, but-"

"You don't like boys?"

Wooyoung thinks he might be having a stroke. He chokes on air. "I...I don't know--"

Jimin waves a hand. "She'll want all the attention on her, anyway, it'll be fine."

He walks out into the hall and when Wooyoung doesn't follow, pops his head back into the room. "You coming?"

His feet move before he can think about it, and it isn't until the parking garage that he finds his voice.

"You want me to....you want me to sleep with your girlfriend?"

Jimin stops and frowns. "No."

Wooyoung relaxes, sagging against the wall.

"I want you to fuck my girlfriend. While I watch. I could give you pointers, you know. Fucking is a lot like dancing."

Jimin winks at him and Wooyoung wonders if it's possible to spontaneously combust.

"This will be a one time thing," Jimin warns.

"O-okay." Wooyoung wonders if he's developed a permanent stutter, possibly from having a stroke after Park fucking Jimin asked him to fuck his girlfriend.

Jimin continues as if Wooyoung had protested. "I know I should work on it, the jealous possessive thing but, you've seen her. Who would want to share?"

Jimin stops in his tracks and Wooyoung almost runs into him.

When he turns to face him, his face is deadly serious. He puts a firm hand on Wooyoung's shoulder.

"This isn't sharing though, yeah? This whole thing? It's my idea. I run the show. I stop the show if I so please. You do what I say, no questions."

Wooyoung nods frantically and Jimin's face breaks out into a big smile. He turns to keep walking and Wooyoung stares after him for a moment, dumbfounded.

He's trying to think of reasons this is a bad idea, but you're really pretty and Jimin has been a role model of his for most of his life and maybe you'll be against the whole thing anyway and you can all go out to dinner or something.

So he follows Jimin to the car and listens to Jimin talk about you most of the way there, only catching bits and pieces because of the way his mind is racing.

"She likes for you to take control, yeah? Don't be afraid to put her in her place. With my permission, of course."

Jimin gives him a sharp look and Wooyoung quickly nods.

When he pulls up to an apartment, Wooyoung is suddenly flooded with anxiety.

"Don't worry," Jimin says, as if sensing it. "She's the sweetest girl in the world, my jagi."

You're sitting cross-legged on the floor with a magazine spread out before you in denim cutoffs and a tanktop, and Wooyoung feels almost instantly smitten when you look up with a smile.

"Jiminie!" You cry warmly, but then you blink when you see Wooyoung, who's trailing behind nervously. "Oh my god," you breathe, standing up and picking at your clothes, brushing a strand of hair from your face.

It's cute, you're cute, and Wooyoung wants to disappear into the floor.

"Jimin, you should have told me you were bringing company-" you start, and Jimin strides over to silence you with a deep kiss that makes Wooyoung's cheeks burn.

Jimin whispers something in your ear and you start with a yelp.

"Jiminie! You can't-"

"It'll be fun, jagi! You said you wanted to try it, yeah?" His mouth moves to your neck and you meet Wooyoung's eyes.

The way your canine pierces the plump flesh of your lip sends heat from his face to his belly, and he clears his throat and looks away.

"Ah, hello," he says lamely.

"You said you didn't want to share," you say, but there's something teasing in your voice instead of anger.

Jimin chuckles. "It's not really sharing if he does only what I say, yeah?"

Wooyoung has no idea what to do so he just stands there with half a boner until you approach him, and then he sticks out his hand awkwardly for you to shake.

You giggle and it's almost like music and he's surprised by how much it relaxes him.

"You're a lot more shy off stage, huh?"

"A little," he admits, feeling his mouth turn up at one corner.

You shake his hand and yours is small in his. "I'm Y/n. It's nice to meet you, Wooyoung."

He's a little embarrassed by the way the sound of his name sends a shock down his spine.

Jimin comes to stand behind you, resting his chin on your shoulder. "So what do you say, jagiya?" 

You look directly into Wooyoung's eyes. "What do you think, Wooyoung? Do you want to play with me?"

***

So that's how Jung Wooyoung ends up sitting on his hands in a chair butt naked with Park Jimin's girlfriend giving him a lap dance.

You're wearing nothing but this lacy violet thong and his mouth is watering, hands twitching under his thighs.

You're facing him and covering your breasts with your hands, but you're well endowed at the sight of all that flesh spilling from your hands makes Wooyoung groan low in his throat.

Shy after being so bold before, you look over your shoulder at Jimin, and Jimin just nods, fully dressed and watching with a sharp eye, smiling when you meet his eyes.

You take a deep breath and lean down so close that he could taste your cleavage if he leaned up and it's a herculean effort not to move.

You straddle his waist, the lace of your panties rubbing up against his embarrassingly hard cock, and he chokes out a sound.

You lean forward and your hands feel warm on his shoulders. 

"Is this okay?" You murmur, right into his ear, and he nods, biting back a moan when you rock your hips forward.

"She likes it when you're vocal. Don't you, baby?" Jimin's voice comes to him in a fog, tinged with Busan satoori.

You nod, giggling softly, and your breath on his neck gives Wooyoung goosebumps.

"You're... you're gorgeous," Wooyoung says, surprised at how hoarse his voice sounds.

"Thank you," you say brightly, giving him a big smile, and Wooyoung thinks it's no wonder Jimin was reluctant to share.

You lean down to press your lips to his throat and Wooyoung lets out a strangled moan and his hips buck up almost involuntarily.

"Watch it," Jimin warns in a low tone, and Wooyoung freezes, letting out a long breath through his nostrils.

"I'm sorry, Jimin-ssi," he breathes.

"Call me hyung, we're friends now, yeah?" Jimin says, waving a hand as if it's nothing.

Wooyoung feels like all the oxygen has disappeared from the room when you touch your tongue to his pulse, rolling your hips forward, your panties damp against his cock. You make this throaty moan and Wooyoung feels precum leak against his stomach.

"Y/n," he says weakly, "I might need a break."

You lift your head, frowning. "Am I doing something wrong?"

Wooyoung would rather die than admit he's about to cum all over his stomach just from you kissing his neck, but Jimin does it for him.

"Never, jagi," Jimin coos, all sharpness in his voice gone."He's just overexcited because you're so sexy."

You're pouting a little, looking down into Wooyoung's eyes, and he swallows hard and nods.

You stand up and that coiling in his belly subsides even as he bemoans the loss of your touch.

"C'mere, baby," Jimin calls, leaning forward to grab you around the waist and pull you into his lap.

It seems too intimate, your smile, the way Jimin kisses the juncture of your neck and shoulder, and Wooyoung looks away.

"No," Jimin says sharply. "Watch."

Wooyoung's eyes snap back to the two of you just as you let out a whimper, and Jimin's hand trails down your stomach, under the waistband of your thong. 

The way your thighs part automatically makes Wooyoung's belly coil again, and he draws in a sharp breath.

Jimin uses his other hand to pull your panties aside roughly and your pussy is glistening and the prettiest pink and Wooyoung can't help but groan.

"She likes it when you tease her a little, but not much," Jimin says, as if this is a lesson. Jimin's fingers tease at your clit until you buck your hips and then chuckles against your shoulder before dipping two fingers into you, making a squelching sound because you're soaking wet.

Wooyoung looks away again as an ache runs up his cock.

"I said watch," Jimin barks, and Wooyoung stiffens and moves his eyes back to you.

You've got your back arched against Jimin, writhing under his hand, and this is hotter than any porn imaginable.

"You're so pretty when you cum, Jagi," Jimin murmurs.

You choke out Jimin's name and Jimin finger fucks you for another moment, murmuring praises in your ear and Wooyoung is holding his breath trying not to move his hands and stroke his aching cock.

When Jimin removes his fingers he spreads your pussy in a "v" so that Wooyoung can see your cunt pulse.

"Please," Wooyoung whimpers, and he doesn't even realize he's said it until Jimin laughs.

"Do you want to fuck him, jagi?" Jimin asks you in a lilting voice, and you twist your head to kiss him softly.

"Not if it'll make you upset, Jiminie," you say sweetly, and Wooyoung feels his chest tighten.

It's so lewd, the scene before him, but also full of love and communication and he feels an odd longing in his gut.

"I don't know," Jimin confesses, and for the first time that day, sounds a little uncertain, but then he kisses you deep and dirty and stands you up. "Let's see."

Jimin crouches to tug off your panties, biting at your ass and making you giggle.

Wooyoung sits stiffly, not knowing what comes next, and then Jimin murmurs something in your ear and you straddle Wooyoung's hips again.

"Hi," you say shyly, and Wooyoung is struck again by your beauty when you smile at him.

"H-hi," he stutters.

"Do you want me to fuck you?" You ask softly, and his breath catches.

"God, yes, please, very much," he babbles, head fuzzy with lust.

Something slick slides down his cock and he gasps, looks down to see you applying a condom.

"Jimin says you can't cum inside," you say matter of factly with your hand around the base of Wooyoung's cock and he can't breathe, almost certain this whole day is a bizarre wet dream.

"Oh-okay," he manages, and looks up at Jimin, who's biting the edge of his thumbnail in the other armchair. "Can...can I touch her?"

Jimin lets out a long breath through his nostrils and stands to scoot the chair closer, running his hands over your arms down to your hips, rocking you against Wooyoung's cock.

"Ah!" Wooyoung cries out at the sudden stimulation.

You lean back against Jimin's chest, hitching in a breath, and Jimin takes hold of your hair tight, twisting your face to kiss you.

"Jesus fucking Christ," Wooyoung mutters.

Jimin seems satisfied, sits back in his chair but stays close. 

"Whatever my baby wants," he says, and there's no bite to it, now.

"Thank you," Wooyoung breathes, and Jimin laughs, seems to relax a little.

Wooyoung has softened just a bit and you stroke your hand up and he gasps when your other hand tugs at his balls.

"Fuck," he curses.

"You can touch me anywhere," you murmur in his ear, and without even thinking about it he grabs two handfuls of your ass and rocks you against him.

You move your hands to get friction, bucking your hips, and Wooyoung can't stop looking at your parted lips.

He tilts his head and kisses you hard and there's a sharp tug on his hair, sending a shock of something between pleasure and pain down his spine.

His head is jerked back and he looks up to see Jimin frowning at him. "No kissing on the mouth," he commands, and Wooyoung makes a distressed noise in the back of his throat.

"Sorry," he manages, and Jimin lets go of his hair so suddenly that his head jerks.

Jimin huffs out a breath and goes back to his chair, and you turn to look at him.

Jimin nods at you, gives you a smile, and you turn back to Wooyoung. 

"You ready?" You ask softly.

Wooyoung is hard as a rock after that hair tug, apparently he's into that, he's learning all sorts of things about himself on this surreal day.

He nods, and you shift up and then he's enveloped in slick heat and his brain shuts off for a moment.

"Ungh," he groans, and rocks you against him again, bouncing you on his cock.

"Wooyoung," you breathe, and he wants to kiss you again but Jimin is watching with dark eyes.

He puts his mouth to the base of your throat instead and you're breathing these little moans and he's thinking of anything else than how your cunt clenches around him to keep from cumming.

The taste of your skin isn't helping so he leans up and your breasts are bouncing in his face and he screws his eyes shut because that's not helping either.

"Jimin," you gasp out, and when he opens his eyes Jimin has his hands on your hips.

Wooyoung drops his arms, not wanting to interfere, and when you whine, he puts them on your breasts, palming over the peaks of your nipples.

Suddenly you're bouncing on his cock unbelievably hard and fast and he doesn't realize for a moment that it's Jimin moving you, kissing and biting at your neck and shoulders as he does so.

"Do you feel good, jagi? Feel worshipped?"

"Ah, ah, Jimin, yes yes yes," you chant.

Wooyoung can't help bucking beneath you, so close to orgasm that his breath is coming fast and hard.

Jimin reaches around to finger your clit and Wooyoung feels used like a sex toy and why is that thought so goddamn hot?

There’s this whining sound coming from his throat, his hands cramping from gripping the bottom of the chair, and Jimin is bouncing you at a relentless pace and then suddenly he stops and you go limp with your back arched against Jimin’s chest.

Wooyoung looks down to see Jimin working your clit with two fingers, rolling it between the ball of his thumb and forefinger.

You choke out Jimin’s name and then your cunt is pulsing hard around his cock and Wooyoung shouts out a curse.

“Ah, please, I’m going to-”

Jimin jerks your hips up, tugging you into his lap instead, and Wooyung cums inside the condom with a desperate cry, panting, knuckles white against the bottom of the chair.

The vision around his eyes goes white, it’s probably the hardest orgasm he’s ever had and while he’s still coming down you rock forward to plant a kiss on his cheek.

“Thank you,” you say brightly, and Wooyoung can’t help but laugh.

“You’re very welcome,” is all he can say, covering his face with his hands.

***

It’s another month before he sees Jimin again, and Wooyoung is already flushed when Jimin smiles at waves at him at an award show.

The conversation turns out okay, warm and polite, until they finish their drink at the bar after.

“So, you wanna come over for a drink? Y/n is in town,” Jimin asks with a sly smile, and Wooyoung stiffens.

After a long moment, he shrugs. “Yeah, what the hell. Let’s go.”

[ambitiousskychild]

Peacock

“Cardinal,” Stan decides.

“Why?” Bev asks suspiciously.

“It’s the red hair,” Richie chimes in, loud and brash. Stan glares at him, though Bev nods, looking cheated. Her gaze slides back over to Stan.

“It’s not,” Stan starts, “just your hair. It’s the males with all that red, anyway.”

“Then what is it?” Bev presses.

“A lot of things! Like—you’re sociable like cardinals are,” Stan explains excitedly like he does. “They interact with any other kind of bird—they’re friendly, like you. And they’re popular like you. They’re the state bird of a couple of states. And they’re really striking in the winter,” he says, and leaves it there. Richie thinks they all must be thinking about that whole winter fire, January embers thing but don’t want to embarrass Ben.

Bev hums to herself, mulling it over, and after a moment’s deliberation, she nods. “Okay, I’ll take it.”

“Thank you,” Stan rolls his eyes. He picks back up his magazine from the dirt floor and sinks deeper into the beanbag. “Sometimes I know a thing or two.”

“Hey, hang on,” Richie snaps, and nearly topples both he and Eddie out of the hammock trying to sit himself upright. “You’re forgetting something, Staniel,” he tells him, though the longer he looks at Stan’s smug face, he doesn’t think he did.

He’d assigned everyone else a bird, not that he’d necessarily wanted to. Admittedly, they all kind of bugged him into it, Bev pushing the hardest, and Stan had held his ground until Bill got on board, saying it’d be fun to know, and then suddenly, Stan turned full bird encyclopedia.

Ben, Stan said just minutes ago, is a mourning dove because they’re a little timid, but can make a home anywhere. Because they’re brownish-grey like trees or most fences, but still easily identifiable because of little details they can’t really hide, and their woeful cooing is a lot like Ben’s poetry.

Bill’s a blue jay, Stan said, and then wouldn’t really expound upon it, dropping his gaze down to his knees and going a bit red in the face. Richie doesn’t think it’s an astoundingly smart observation on his part, but he sees the way Stan gets himself lost in Bill’s big blue eyes sometimes and thinks maybe that’s that.

Mike is a goldfinch, sunny and golden like living breathing sunshine, he’d said, also red-faced. And Eddie is a hummingbird for obvious tiny, angry, quick-tempered reasons that Eddie very vocally resented.

When pressed, Stan classified himself as a crow. Richie thinks that that’s because he thinks he’s mean, but Richie himself thinks Stan is a crow because he’s so smart. Then, of course, he listed Bev as a cardinal—friendly, and stunning, and fiery. Fine, good, fun, but now apparently, he’s trying to cheat Richie for some reason, and that’s not going to fucking fly.

“So what about me, huh?” Richie presses as Stan stares at him from over the top of his magazine. “Come on, Stan, lay it on me, I’m not gonna be mad,” Richie crows. He folds his arms behind his head and kicks his foot against the ground to sway the hammock, watches the way Eddie scowls at his comic because of it. “I bet I already know what I am, huh? A big ole’ blue tit—”

“Peacock,” Stan deadpans, and he lowers his magazine just to unblinkingly stare at him, and Richie falters, stops kicking his foot for half a second but he catches himself.

“O-ho-ho, Stanley, I promise you nothing about it is pea-sized.”

The clubhouse groans in union.

“Shut up, Richie,” Eddie hisses, kicking at him with his sock-clad foot as Richie cackles and grabs him around the ankle. He grabs the other ankle too and makes a show of trying to toss him out of the hammock as Eddie shrieks at him to stop.

“That’s not the reason,” Stan says evenly, knowingly, over the commotion.

“Is it because I’m so pretty?” Richie grins, tickling Eddie behind the knees. Eddie laughs so hard he snorts. Richie keeps doing it.

“It’s because you fucking dress like one,” Eddie grits out through his laughter, kicking at him again, and Richie gets ready to start the entire tickling process all over again, but Stan shoots him a look.

“Did you know that peacocks fake being sexually active?” he asks, drops it like a bombshell and the clubhouse goes quiet. “Yeah, they do their mating call and yell and scream until peahens come check it out and then they try to seduce them all.”

“Oh, shit,” Mike scoffs behind his hand.

Slowly, the rest of them also fall to pieces.

“And you think that sounds like me?” Richie demands, dramatic on purpose. He looks accusingly around at each of his snickering, back-stabbing friends. “Wow. Betrayed by a bunch of virgins.”

“Uh-huh,” Bill smirks. “S-sounds like peacock talk to m-me.”

“You do need attention,” Bev cuts in, “like, constantly.”

Mike nods vigorously. “Sometimes you strut.”

“Oh ha-ha, assholes, I don’t need that much attention,” Richie laughs, though he feels a little flushed beneath his smile, feels just a little too seen. “Who else’s attention do I need anyway but Eddie’s mom’s, huh?” he laughs, catches Eddie’s ankle again as it swings at him.

“Well, you’re half right,” Stan says in his knowing blasé way, and it makes Richie freeze right up.

He knows Eddie feels it. He can’t lift his gaze from his hands as he tries to think of some witty comeback but comes up blank in his terror. He feels like they’re all watching him yank his hand from Eddie’s skin. He risks a glance across the hammock at Eddie who’s already staring back at him with thick, furrowed brows. Richie drops his gaze again, face warming and warming.

“Wait, you guys think my poetry is sad?” Ben demands suddenly.

Richie snaps his attention up to see a subtly smiling Ben. He shoots Richie a small thumbs-up and Richie smiles gratefully back.

“It’s n-not that it’s sad,” Bill starts, already pretentious as he always is when it comes to writing, and Richie sighs out loud when the conversation takes off in that direction, fades into the background.

Then Eddie taps the heel of his foot gently against his shoulder, gives Richie half a second to nearly panic about it as the others get downright loud around them before lightly tapping at his shoulder again.

“Hey,” he says, when Richie finds the courage to drag his eyes up to his face, only to be shocked at how pink it is. “Just so you know, like. For the record and everything. I always liked peacocks,” he admits lowly, eyes jumping all around the room as his cheeks flush redder and redder. “They’re pretty,” he says, and Richie grins. His heart skips a beat.

“Aw,” he coos, heart racing all over again. He almost wants to be embarrassed about it, but he’s an expert in making his own embarrassment Eddie’s problem by now. “What a sweet little hummingbird.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Eddie snaps, but his hand finds Richie’s between them, out of view.

[k-writer1998]

Black, White, Grey (2/3)

Having Bang Chan as your best friend is great cause he’s literally the best but not so much when you’ve had a crush on him for a majority of the friendship.

Angst

w.c: 2.2k

Part 1

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Shoot! I’m going to be late,” I cursed under my breath.

      It’s been a few months since I last saw Chan, they were promoting and I was filming a new drama but with our hectic lives it was nothing new. We usually just occasionally updated each other every now and then either by messaging or the rare phone call. What was new was the urgent message I got from Chan yesterday saying that we needed to talk ASAP. I had a few hours between shoots today so we decided to meet at a coffee shop between our two locations. By the time I got there, Chan was already sitting with two drinks on the table.

“Sorry I’m late, the shoot ran a little longer then it should’ve.”

“It’s fine,” he chuckled, “I got you your usual.”

“Thanks. So what’s up? What’s with the urgency?” I asked as I took a sip of my drink.

“Well you remember Eunhye?”

      I really wish I couldn’t but it’s hard not to when he talks about her… a lot. From what I know they’ve gone on a handful of dates and she is really understanding with the idol stuff. Apparently since she's a university student on the verge of graduating, so she’s pretty busy herself, things have been going well, and he really likes her. The urgency of needing to meet him, him bringing her up, the nervous energy flowing off of him… I didn’t have a good feeling about it. I prepared my heart for the worst and turned on my actress switch as a smile pulled across my lips.

“Yeah what about her?”

“Well… I really like her…”

“What? I didn’t know,” I gasped sarcastically.

“Stop I’m being serious,” he chuckled softly.

“Then just spill it already, it’s just me. I’m not going to judge you.”

“It’s just you’re the first to know so it kinda feels weird saying it out loud… I want to ask her to be my girlfriend. I mean not now but after promotions in a few weeks.”

      Even though on the outside my mouth dropped and my smile grew bigger as a gasp escaped my lips, inside… a heart wrenching scream clawed my chest. Yet another piece of my heart shattered to dust but now was not the time to dwell on myself. At least the next words that fell from my lips were honest, given from what little was left of my heart.

“Oh my god! Chan I’m happy for you. I mean I’ll be honest this will probably be like fighting an uphill battle but you know I’m always the pessimist in these situations. I am 100% happy for you though, you deserve it and your happiness is mine.”

“Thanks for your well wishes and warning,” he rolled his eyes with a laugh before adding, “You’re the best and remember I’ll always return the favor if you have someone you like.”

      How does that work when that someone is you?

“Thanks Chan, believe me I know,” I laugh.

“There isn’t anyone right now right? I know I haven’t really got to check up much on you since I’ve been going on about Eunhye and been busy with promotions…”

“Don’t worry about it, you didn’t miss anything. There’s no one right now.”

“Good but when that happens I better be the first to know,” he joked before he added on a more serious note, “no secrets right?”

“No secrets,” I smiled. No secrets… except for this one.

      I may have gone through this a few times already but like Seungmin said, it still hurts no matter how many times I go through it. We chatted a bit longer before we had to go for our next schedules but not before he planned something so that I could properly meet Eunhye… stupid best friend responsibilities. I know he hoped we got along and that was never the hard part when he got into a relationship. The hard part of it all was having to see her separate the grey areas in our friendship into black and white. When the day came, we met at the theaters to watch the movie Chan and I promised to see together. Our usual of sharing popcorn and a drink, making commentary during the movie, sitting close enough so that our shoulders touched… became a him and her thing with me watching the movie silently, an empty feeling on my sides, eating popcorn from a bucket far too big for myself because ordering a large was a force of habit. I still smiled, laughed, joined the conversation, and played the best friend role like I was supposed to. My mind was just in a haze through it all and although Chan noticed it, my lies blended with the truth. I told him I was tired, I just didn't specify that it was physically from work, emotionally from unrequited feelings and mentally from keeping up my farce. 

      The rest of those two weeks blurred together as the heartbreak set it deeper and deeper as each day passed. I was finally snapped out of my daze when I got messages from Seungmin in Minho in our "feelings" group chat when I was on break during filming. I’m guessing Chan took more time to clearly think about this before he told the boys. Throughout the day we exchanged messages but even though we were all busy, they demanded me to video call them once I was off even if it was at an ungodly hour. I love those two but together they were bossy and a force to be reckoned with. I agreed and didn’t get a message until I had just finished filming my last scene. They were back at the dorm and were reminding me to call. I rolled my eyes before updating them that I had just finished and would be home soon. By the time I had texted them I was home, my foot barely through the door, my phone rang with a face-time notification. I chastised them the moment their faces appeared on screen.

“You know there is this thing called patience right?”

“Well that is reserved for people who keep us updated,” Minho countered.

“Wasn’t my update to tell but okay,” I rolled my eyes but as I noticed the background behind them I dropped my voice, “are you guys in your room?! Don’t you guys share a room? Can you even be on call right now?”

“Well the person in question is sleeping and we aren’t that loud so it’s fine. We’re on the other side of the room.”

“So how are you?” Seungmin interrupted before I could rebut.

“At least someone cares,” I joke.

“Come on, be serious.”

“Okay sorry. You know I don't do "feelings"… Uhm… well… I’m better than the first day I heard the news but that can’t really say much.”

“Used work to fill the void? Have you at least been getting proper rest?”

“Yup. It helps that they are filming a bulk of my scenes right now so my mind stays occupied but sorry Seungmin sleep is not my friend right now.”

“I still can’t believe how dense Chan-hyung is. You’ve been friends for six years and you’ve had a crush on him for five, I’m sorry but how has he not figured it out or at least noticed something?”

      As Minho got annoyed his voice got a bit louder and we all froze as we heard rustling coming from the other side of the room. No one moved for a good few minutes to ensure Chan was still sleeping. When we were sure, Seungmin nudged Minho with his shoulder.

“Hyung, keep it down.”

“My bad! It just sucks that one friend is hurting our other friend and he doesn’t even know,” Minho hissed.

“Awww thanks Minho,” I teased.

“Whatever,” Minho mumbled before adding, “I’m just surprised the feeling lasted this long even after everything.”

“Well you know your leader, it’s kinda hard to get over someone like that. Like have you seen him? His body-”

“Ahhhhh, I don’t want to hear it,” Seungmin whined.

“I mean you’re right but ewwww.”

“I’m kidding,” I chuckled softly, “But on a more serious note… I just… I don’t know why I can’t get over Chan. I mean when I figured out I liked him five years ago it was the thing that I’ve liked him for awhile already before I even realized it and no matter what happens or how many times my heart breaks… that feeling is still there. I mean I, without a doubt, can say that he is my first love. Any guy I find, no matter how much I love him… I don’t think I’ll love him as much as I love Chan… Oh jeez.”

      Before I knew it there were tears streaming down my face as I was explaining. This was the first time I have vocalized just how much Chan meant to me and hearing it aloud just made everything so much worse. I gave a dry chuckle as I tried to furiously wipe away the tears but to no avail. The tears I’ve held back for so long took the chance to fall and I had no control anymore. I started to curse as the tears turned to sobs and the boys tried their best to soothe me through the screen. The rest of the night was filled with the boys comforting me and me finally letting it all out. After the call it felt lighter in my chest but that just gave pain more room to fill and I didn’t know which one was worse. I need to pull myself together or I’ll never be able to make it through dinner with the boys and Eunhye in a few days. It took a bit but the pain somehow subsided to a dull numbness where I could properly pretend to be myself. 

      The day of, I met the boys outside the barbecue restaurant and greeted them happily. Chan said that Eunhye was a bit behind so she’ll meet us inside. While he explained, he casted a nervous glance at me. I tiled my head, mouthing a “what?” in confusion, but he just shook his head and smiled before leading us in. Once we were seated, everyone began to chatter about the menu, arguing and discussing what they wanted to eat. I smiled at the organized chaos, a calming constant in my life. After a few more minutes passed Eunhye came in and greeted everyone. She came over and sat next to me, causing me to move closer to Seungmin and away from my place in front of Chan. Throb. No heart, not in front of Chan. I knew Minho and Seungmin would worriedly look at me but, among the many other strange things he’s been doing tonight, Chan too was anxiously giving me looks. When I finally caught him I raised an eyebrow in question but he quickly turned away, laughing at something Eunhye had said. When the food finally came I took my usual job of manning the grill and Eunhye helped. Out of habit I placed a majority of the meat onto the other members’ plates like I always have, save a few pieces for myself, and moved to Chan’s except Eunhye beat me to it. She giggled as he got flustered by her action… replaced yet again. Our eyes connected and for a second his eyes filled with panic and I just gave him a weird look before turning my attention back to the grill in front of me. Halfway through the meal my phone buzzed and I excused myself and stepped out of the restaurant, moving to a less crowded area to minimize the noise.

“Manager Kim? What's up?”

“Did you check your texts? There’s good news.”

“Huh? I’m at dinner right now, I haven’t had a chance to look at my phone. Give me a sec,” as I pulled up my texts I gave a delighted squeal as I put my phone back to my ear, “No way?! Seriously?!”

“Yup, once we finalize everything on our end, make sure you’re ready to go, got it?”

“Yeah of course. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

      A satisfied sigh left my lips as I held my phone to my chest. Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath to enjoy the chilly night air as it filled my lungs. There was a comfort in the cold isolation of outside compared to inside and I basked in it a bit longer. As I turned to head back to the door I saw Chan coming to me.

"Hey is everything alright? You've been out here for awhile."

"Oh yeah, my manager was just updating me on the changes in my schedule. Are you okay though? You've been kinda weird all night."

"Haha yeah, I'm fine. Let's go back in yeah?"

"... Okay."

      I knew it was a lie. There was something bugging him but I won't pry. That's not how we were, it just naturally comes out and if he's holding back there’s a reason. I could never really badger him either when I’m now keeping two big secrets from him…

[shotgun--rider]

Fake It Till You Make It - One

A Sam x Reader Series

PART ONE

Y/N knows it’s a bad idea to try telling her family that she’s dating Sam Winchester. But it’s just for the week of her sister’s wedding, and it’s all fake anyway. What could go wrong?

Word Count: 3600

Warnings: plus size! Reader, background Destiel for a hot sec, fatphobic comments, Y/N’s family are demons

A/N: Has this trope probably been done five million times? Yes. Am I about to do it again? Yes. 

Your cellphone rang and you grimaced, rolling your eyes as you took in Dean’s all-too-amused expression. Your best friend may have thought your situation was the funniest thing he’d ever heard, but that didn’t mean you were of the same opinion. 

“What?” you snapped out, not bothering to read the caller ID. Who else would be calling you for the fifth time in as many hours?

“Well that’s not a very nice way to greet your mother.”

Here you went again, the same thing over and over. You pinched the bridge of your nose and sighed. “What do you want now, Mom?”

Bent over something under Baby’s hood, Dean snorted, shamelessly listening to your half of the conversation. He could probably hear your mother too, you thought wryly. The woman was certainly loud enough. 

“Well, listen, honey,” your mother began. “I was just talking to Jimmy...you remember Jimmy? From down the street, you used to--”

“Yes, Mom, I remember Jimmy.” you said tiredly. “Why do we care about Jimmy?” Please don’t say what I think you’re going to say. 

“For the wedding! I just asked, and Jimmy agreed to come with you.”

You let out an alarmed noise before you could stop yourself. “Mom, no.” you said firmly, with an undercurrent of panic at the thought of being trailed around by awkward Jimmy for a week. “I know it’s hard to imagine,” you drawled sarcastically, “but the vows will still be successful if I’m there without a plus one. Not like I’m the one getting married, you know.”

Still focused on the Impala, Dean’s shoulders were shaking with suppressed laughter. You seized the apple core you’d been munching on earlier and chucked it at him, feeling marginally better when it bounced off of his back. 

“Y/N L/N! You should be a little more grateful. Besides, have you even thought about how it’s going to look to Dick if you show up alone?”

“I don’t care,” you said automatically. “He’s a dick, pun absolutely intended.”

“He’s marrying your sister.”

“At least it’s not me.” 

“That miserable attitude is exactly why you’re going to die alone, young lady,” your mother snipped. “You could at least make an effort. Maybe if you just lost some weight--”

“Yeah, okay Mom.” You hung up the phone before she could get another word in, immediately flopping back onto Dean’s front lawn in defeat. “If I ever get married, it’s going to be in Vegas with Elvis, and nobody is going to know about it.” Not that you would. Given your complete inability to keep a boyfriend for longer than two months and your habit of getting hung up on guys who were completely out of your league, marriage, or a relationship of any kind didn’t seem to be in the cards. 

“Who’s Jimmy?” Dean’s green eyes were sparkling with mischief, and you let out a groan, smoothing out the skirt of your sundress as you sat back up to answer him. 

“Straight-laced, awkward, kind of greasy. Went to high school with me.” You wrinkled your nose. “My mother is really scraping the bottom of the barrel. She’d throw a fit if I actually tried to bring him home. But apparently Jimmy is a better temporary solution than being single while my sister marries my ex.” You trailed off into silence, your hand pulling absently at a few strands of grass in your best friend’s front lawn. “Maybe I should just rent a boyfriend to shut her up. That’s a thing, right? Like a non-sexual escort.”

“If you’re going to the trouble, you should also get the sex,” Dean returned, still smirking at you as he wiped grease off his hands. “Or you could take me. I would make the best fake boyfriend. And I’m free if you feed me.”

You rolled your eyes at him, laughing at the mental image. “My mom knows you have a boyfriend,” you sighed. “Which, believe me, is a great source of sadness to her every single day.”

Dean laughed loudly, both of you glancing toward the house as the screen door swung open. “Maybe we broke up,”

“Well, she still doesn’t understand the concept of bisexuality, so as far as she’s concerned, you’d still be gay.” You rolled your eyes, long since over your mother’s narrow-minded opinions.

“Who’s gay?” Castiel inquired vaguely, making his way over to the flowerbeds. 

“Dean is,” you pointed out helpfully, prompting a wide-eyed stare from Cas. 

“Really? Dean, you should have told me!”

When you’d first met Dean’s new boyfriend, he’d been stiff and absolutely useless at sarcasm. It was always nice to see yours and Dean’s combined efforts working.

“D’you want me to ask Sammy?”

You were still laughing at Cas’s antics, and snapped your head back to Dean so fast that you were positive something popped in your neck. “W-what?”

 “I can ask Sam if he’s free that week,” Dean repeated, looking at you like he thought you were stupid. “If you want,”

You blinked, irrational panic running through you at the thought of Dean’s younger, perfect, brother. 

“It’ll shut your mom up,” Dean went on, oblivious. “Sammy wouldn’t mind.”

“Dean, I barely ever see Sam,” you protested after an awkward pause. A fact that was quite devastating, actually, not that you’d ever admit to your hopeless crush on the younger Winchester. 

Your best friend and his boyfriend shared a look. “That’s because he’s a hopeless do-gooder on top of being a hotshot lawyer,” Dean said fondly. “But I bet we could talk him out of taking a bunch of free cases for a week,”

Walking into your sister’s wedding with Sam Winchester on your arm sounded like a disaster waiting to happen. On the other hand, it would shut your mother up. She’d been vocal in her fears of you dying alone since you’d been barely out of college, sending you links to weight-loss workout videos and advertising her fixer-upper daughter to single men in the grocery store for years. Sam’s presence might even serve to stave off comments about your weight, which seemed to be the family’s second-favorite discussion topic any time they were together. 

Still, that meant pretending Sam Winchester was your boyfriend for a week, which just seemed like some masochistic form of self inflicted torture. Besides, if even you knew Sam would never go for a girl like you, how in the world were you supposed to sell it to your nosy, skeptical family?

“I was mostly kidding about the whole fake boyfriend thing, Dean,” you said wearily, not wanting to devote any more thought to the idea. 

Dean shrugged easily, sharing one more pointed look with Cas before refocusing on you. “Fair enough. You’re still staying for dinner, though, right?”

You’d have to be crazy to turn down one of Dean’s steaks. “Obviously.”

“Great,” he returned brightly. “I think Charlie’s coming.”

--

You were going to kill Dean. And Cas too, potentially, though it was entirely possible that he’d genuinely just been too preoccupied with his backyard beehive to remember the full extent of his boyfriend’s dinner plans. Because, apparently, “Charlie’s coming” actually meant, “Charlie and also Sam are coming.” 

It only took about five minutes for Dean to bring up your mother’s nonsense, prompting you to consider just face planting into the mashed potatoes in embarrassment while Charlie burst out laughing. She thought the whole thing was unbelievably hilarious, and had immediately offered herself up as a fake date. The offer was well meant, you knew, but you were only trying to get your mother to shut up, not disown you for bringing home a girlfriend.  

“I don’t need a date,” you finally huffed out, irritated with the whole thing. “I’m perfectly capable of showing up by myself. It’s not like anyone’s going to have anything to say about it that I haven’t already heard.” It was true. Your mother, and you sister and all of your aunts and uncles, for that matter, had been making the same jabs at your weight and relationship status for the past decade. You were used to it by now. 

“Doesn’t mean you should have to hear it,” Charlie shrugged. “If we’re too gay for your mother, get somebody else.”

“I tried to tell her Sammy would do it,” Dean put in unhelpfully, elbowing his brother, who had been silent up until this point. You contemplated kicking him under the table. 

“Poor Sam does not need to be subjected to my family for no good reason,” you said firmly, hoping that would be the end of it.

Sam was studying you across the table. “Or you could just ask me,” he said finally, and you felt your face heat up as you realized you’d basically been speaking for him. 

“Yes!” Charlie burst out before you could come up with a reply. “Sam doesn’t mind, do you, Sam?”

Too late, you realized Charlie was the real villain in all of this. Your old roommate, after all, was the one who knew about your little crush. You wondered if it was worth running the risk of trying to kick her under the table without hitting Cas, who thus far had remained off of your hit list. 

Sam cleared his throat roughly, looking between you, Charlie, and his plate. “No, I don’t--I mean, I don’t think Y/N really--”

“No, I do,” you blurted out, scrunching up your face immediately after the words left your lips. I do? I do? Since when? And what was it about Sam fucking Winchester that always made you act like a complete idiot? 

Dean was smirking at you across the table, and you idly wondered what would happen if you tried egging Baby. 

“Oh,” Sam brought you back out of your thoughts, looking hesitantly pleased. “Well, I just wrapped my latest case up, so I don’t mind coming up with you for that week. If you want.”

“Are you sure?” you bit your lip. There were a lot of emotions vying for your attention, but the dominating one was concern for Sam’s wellbeing. He had no idea what he was trying to agree to. 

Sam sighed, staring you down with those hazel eyes. “Y/N, you’re basically family. Of course I’m sure. You just worry about the maid of honor stuff, and I’ll watch your back. Okay?”

This was a significantly softer ending to dinner than you’d expected, but you couldn’t deny the warm feeling that rushed up inside you at his words. I’ll watch your back. Pretty much no one in your life had ever done anything of the sort, until you met Charlie, and, through her, the Winchesters. You’d known Dean for months before you finally met Sam, and of course he was perfect. 

It was easy with Dean, since he’d been the big brother you’d never had from day one. Sure, he wasn’t bad looking (seriously those boys won some kind of genetic lottery, you swore) but it just wasn’t like that. And then Sam had shown up and he was six and a half feet of walking perfection. 

And now he was smiling reassuringly at you across the dinner table, having just agreed to pose as your completely fake boyfriend in front of your god awful family. Well, at least you’d be able to pinpoint the exact moment your life went completely sideways, if you ever had to look back.

-- 

Two anxiety-filled weeks later found you in Sam’s car, because subjecting his long legs to your tiny vehicle for a seven hour drive just seemed like cruel and unusual punishment. You were driving at his insistence, and Sam was in the passenger seat with a legal pad on his legs like he thought he was going to take notes.

“Sam,” you whined out, “is this really necessary? Can’t we just... you know, lie?” Since the whole thing is a big fat giant lie anyway. 

Sam raised an eyebrow at you, and it just wasn’t fair how sexy that made him look. “Y/N, you’re the one that kept trying to warn me about getting cross examined by your mother,”

“Such a lawyer,” you huffed. “Okay, fine, you’re right. Let’s write our fake love story,” You batted your eyelashes at him exaggeratedly, punching a surprised laugh out of Sam. He watched your antics in amusement for a moment, and then refocused, absently playing with a pen in his long fingers. 

“Okay, how did we meet?”

You cocked your head to one side. “My mom knows who you are,” you explained. “Vaguely, but she knows you’re Dean’s brother. We can just tell them how we actually met and stuff,”

Sam smirked at you. “You tell your mother about me?”

You made a face at him, smacking his arm as the heat of embarrassment suffused your entire body. “Just in passing, don’t go getting a big head. Well,” you made a show of studying him, “a bigger head,”

He looked affronted, running a hand briefly through his hair. “Okay, fine, we met because of Dean. Where did I take you on our first date?”

“Why did you have to take me out? What if I took you out?” You were mostly arguing for the sake of arguing, trying to keep yourself from thinking too hard as you imagined a fake life with Sam that had never happened and never would. He thought of you as family, he’d said as much, and you had to remember that. 

“Because I had been waiting forever to ask you out, and I had all the good date ideas saved up,” Sam answered immediately.

“O-okay,” you said hesitantly, jarred by the conviction in his statement. But that was the point, wasn’t it? You were trying to sell it, and Sam was obviously a good actor. And unfairly attractive. And kind. And...and oh god. Your fingers gripped the steering wheel harder as you thought about the unexpected trial he hadn’t signed up for. “Sam, can you golf?”

He shrugged. “I know how it’s supposed to work. I’m just...not that good at actually getting the balls in the holes.”

If Dean were here, he would have taken that opportunity to make a lewd joke. As it was, you just winced. “My dad is going to force you to go golfing,” you explained tiredly. “I should have thought of that, I’m sorry, I--”

“It’s no big deal, Y/N,” Sam assured you easily. “I don’t mind. Besides, I want to meet your dad,”

You blinked at him, almost missing a turn in the process. “You actually want to meet my family? Sam, they’re terrible. Well, my dad’s probably the least awful of the bunch. Mostly he just hides. But Ruby will definitely try hitting on you, even though she’s supposed to be getting married, and Dick will try hitting on everything with legs, which is just gross, and Gramma Lilith is gonna give you the speech about how you could do so much better, and my Uncle Az is going to start Googling you and making weird threats, probably…” you trailed off in a huff. “It could be worse, I guess. At least if Uncle Fergus shows up everybody’ll start yelling at him instead. One can hope. He’s pretty harmless,” you shrugged, “if sometimes high. And my mother will probably just stick to the usual fat girl comments, so…”

Sam’s quiet laughter at your descriptions trailed off. “Y/N, you know there’s nothing wrong with you, right?”

You just shrugged again, deflecting. “Oh, come on, Sam, you don’t have to pretend like you think I’m a size two or something,”

“I’m...not,” Sam sounded genuinely confused, and you risked a glance over at him in the passenger seat. Oddly enough, he didn’t look like he was lying. Huh. “I think you’re beautiful.”

You didn’t want to have to pretend not to be affected by that, and this was maybe the first time in your life you’d actually been grateful to see the turnoff for your family’s old estate. “Here we go,” you narrated a little shakily. “It’s a big house,” you warned, still smiling a little at the way Sam’s eyes widened. 

It had been a given that the wedding would take place at your Aunt Abaddon’s old estate house, which no one was quite sure how she’d acquired and which no one questioned. The only fun of the house was watching people’s reactions on the rare occasion that you brought someone here. 

“I’ll get the bags,” Sam said vacantly, still staring at the house, and you chuckled softly, getting out of the car in a rush. You couldn’t explain it, but it felt important that you got to your family before Sam did, to put yourself between them, though at this point you weren’t quite sure who was being shielded from whom. 

You smoothed down the little sundress you’d decided to wear, grabbing your small duffel out of the backseat and hastily going up the front walk, Sam still rummaging in the trunk.

“Y/N!” Ruby opened the front door to meet you, her smile already insincere and condescending. “You’re late. We thought you weren’t coming.” She glanced behind you briefly, then smirked. “And you’re alone. I mean I figured you wouldn’t actually find a plus one, but you know you’re gonna owe me for the meal--”

“Got everything?” 

Oh thank god for Sam Winchester. You smiled tightly at your older sister, glancing briefly at your shoulder to reassure yourself that Sam was there. He was, holding a bag in each hand and a pleasant smile on his face. It was totally his false courtroom smile, but Ruby didn’t have to know that. “Ruby, this is...my boyfriend. Sam.”

Ruby blinked long eyelashes at him, processing. You figured she was torn between insulting you and flirting with him, and, as expected, the flirting won out. “Hi, Sam,” she purred. “I can’t wait to get to know you a little better,”

“Right,” Sam said flatly. “Well, I can’t wait to put these bags down, so…”

Something in Ruby’s expression soured as she looked at him, and her hand fell away from the doorframe as she stepped back, letting you both into the house. You lost no time in ducking past her, Sam right behind you. 

“There’s rooms on the second floor,” Ruby said quietly, then, “I’m up there too, just in case you get bored...”

“Great,” Sam returned, and he shifted both of the bags into one hand to put a hand on your back as you walked toward the staircase. You shivered at the touch, exhaling the frustration that was already tensing your shoulders, and started up the stairs. God, it hadn’t even been five minutes. How were you supposed to get through a whole week of this?

Sam’s warm breath on your ear startled you, and he whispered, “So, third floor?”

You turned to catch him with a mischievous spark in his hazel eyes, and nodded quickly, a little smile pulling up the corners of your mouth as you started toward the second staircase with a new energy in your step. 

“Hurry your fat ass, Y/N!” you heard Ruby shriek from somewhere below. “Everyone’s already out in the garden,”

You blew out your breath, hastily swinging open the first door you saw. The room was mercifully unoccupied, with a queen bed in the middle of the room and not much in the way of decoration. Your Aunt Abaddon had always been pretty minimalist. 

Sam shut the door behind you both, setting the bags down in a line at the foot of the bed.

“I can sleep on the floor,” you said quickly, figuring that it was best to get that out of the way as quickly as possible. “I’m the one that got you into this, so--”

He turned to face you with a quizzical expression. “Why would you...Y/N, you didn’t get me into anything. I said I wanted to be here. If you’re not comfortable, I’ll sleep on the floor,”

“No,” you sighed out, defeated. “Ruby’ll probably try barging in here anyway. I don’t think she believes you’re dating someone like me. We’re adults,” you went on with more confidence than you felt, “we can share,”

Sam’s brow furrowed adorably. Stop that. “Someone like you?” He moved to stand in front of you, one hand sliding very gently along your upper arm. “She doesn’t think I’d go for someone that’s funny and clever and really pretty?”

Something in your chest eased at his words, and, before your malfunctioning brain could stop you, you leaned forward to rest your forehead against his solid chest. “Thanks. She’s a bitch,” you mumbled into his shirt.

Sam’s hand migrated to gently rub over your back. “I’m beginning to get that impression,”

You stood there for a few more moments, letting yourself breathe within the safety of Sam’s arms, and then you straightened up and shook yourself. “Alright, boyfriend, ready to go meet the rest of the firing squad?”

He smiled down at you. “Whatever you say, honey bunch.”

You grimaced, but it got a laugh out of you, which you supposed had been his goal. “Absolutely not.”

“Cutie pie? Boo bear?”

“Stop it,” you threw a mock glare over your shoulder, opening the bedroom door. 

“Okay, darlin’,” Sam murmured, and somehow that one sat better than all the rest. “I’ve got your back, remember?”

You smiled back at him, letting him slide his hand in yours for the show, and you braced yourself to head back downstairs and deal with the full force of your family. 

[softboywriting]

Hitched | Shawn Mendes

Summary: After a wild night in Vegas you and Shawn end up married according to the tabloids. Will these rumors change your dynamic and be the push the two of you need to finally admit your feelings for each other, or will it be the end of your relationship both professionally and personally? [personal assistant reader] [fake married] [accidentally married] [non au theme] 

Word Count: 8.5k 

|Masterlist In Bio|

Early morning sun blinds you through the windows of your hotel suite. Your head pounds, body feeling like it's been hit with a sack of bricks. Your mouth is dry like sandpaper as you reach for a bottle on the nightstand. There's a heavy weight across your stomach and you look down. An arm. A bulky thick arm with the tattoo of an orchid in a light bulb. Shawn.  

You push back the blankets to reveal the sleeping giant. He is sprawled out beside you on his stomach, arm across your waist, face pressed into the pillows. This wasn't the first time the two of you ended up in bed together, and it wouldn't be the last. At least he went home with you last night. As soon as the tequila shots had come out, you started to worry. Shawn and tequila don't mix well and he gets a little crazy.  

A pang of sickness washes over you and you need to get up. It's not like you to drink when Shawn drinks. It's sort of your job to keep him out of trouble and on task. But shit happens. At least he's with you, like you said. You did your job well enough. You push at his arm and instead of removing it, he curls it tighter around you, pressing on your stomach.

“Shawn, I have to get up. I feel sick.”

“Mmm.” He groans and rubs his face into his pillow. “No, stay with me.”

“Shawn. Now.”

“Stop talking.” He rolls over, toward you, and tugs you closer to him. “My head hurts.”

“You're hungover.”

“Probably.”

You run your hand over his hair and glitter falls out. You have no idea where that came from but it isn't what you're really focusing on. No. The ring on your finger is what catches your eye. It's Shawn's, his pinky ring, the rose gold one. Why were you wearing it on your wedding ring finger? Why were you wearing it at all? Oh no. A portion of the night comes flooding back to you. Brian had been joking with Shawn that since he lost his passport yesterday morning, he was illegal in the USA. Oh God Shawn no. You love Shawn, hell, you know him better than most at this point. It's hard not to fall in love with someone like him, but those feelings were counterproductive to your job and he could never know. Though you suppose he already does, the two of you couldn't deny looks and familiar touches. It was complicated.

“Shawn get up,” you push him off of you and he sits up quickly. “What happened last night?”

He holds his head and groans loudly. He'd had far more to drink than you did. “I don't remember.”

You put your hand out for him. “Did we get married?”

“What?!” Shawn grabs your hand and studies the ring on your finger. “No! Why would we do that?! I know we got smashed but fucking christ.”

“I don't know! Call Brian. Maybe he remembers?”

Shawn pats around under the pillows and produces his phone. “Fuck,” he turns the screen toward you and there's a bunch of missed calls and texts. You can't help but notice his background is the two of you backstage at the capital summertime ball last year. He picked you up on his shoulders to see the stage and Brian snapped a photo. He calls Andrew instead of Brian since the missed calls were all from him.

“Morning newlyweds,” Andrews voice crackles over the speakerphone between you and Shawn. “Hungover?”

“Andrew what happened last night?”

“You guys must have been seriously messed up. You wouldn't believe me if I told you.”

You sigh. “Andrew what happened?”

“Well Brian convinced Shawn that because we can't find his passport, he had to marry a US citizen to stay in the country. Which is ridiculous, because I just had to go get a temp until we can get back to Toronto and get a new one. Anyway, you and Shawn ditched everyone and went to get hitched in the basement chapel of the hotel by some Elvis impersonator who was on site for a gimmick wedding being hosted last night.”

“It's probably not even legal then. We didn't sign anything, it's just a ceremony right?”

“No, not technically, he was a justice of the peace though. Registered and everything. Brian and Zubin were your witnesses.” Andrew sighs and you roll your eyes. “Luckily it was just you four idiots and no one but us knows about this.”

Shawn holds his head. “Okay well, it's fine then.”

“Perfect. Thank Andrew.” You click to hang up and stare at Shawn. “You're so dumb y'know that?”

“Oh shut up. You obviously agreed to go along with it, so you're pretty dumb too.”

You shove him and he shoves you back, pinning you to the bed. “Shawn I swear to God if you-”

He leans down and gets close to your face. His breath ghosts over your cheek and jawline. He's going to threaten to lick you. Somehow he found out that spit grosses you out; the wet feeling, the knowing it came from someone else's mouth, all of it just squicks you out. He found out and now every chance he gets he uses it against you when he doesn't get his way or wants something. He was a damn man child sometimes. “Take it back or I'll do it.”

“Never.”

“Last chance.”

You close your eyes and wait for the worst. You'll never admit defeat. He was dumb, the whole marriage thing had to be his idea. How he convinced you in your drunken state to marry him you will never know. Obviously your brain had decided to put feelings for Shawn over work, rational thinking and common sense last night, but it's still definitely his fault.

He opens his mouth and you can feel his breath hotter than ever. You struggle against his hold and then go still when his mouth connects with your cheek. It's not spit, it's not his tongue. It's his lips, warm and soft against your skin.

“What're you doing?”

“What?”

You peek one eye open and look down at him. “Aren't you going to lick me?”

“Nah. You're my wife now.” He grins and kisses your cheek again. “I guess I gotta be sweet on you.”

“Oh shut up! I'm not actually your wife!” You shove him as he releases your arms and falls over laughing. “Get dressed chuckles. We have to be at the airport soon.”

____________________

“So are you taking my last name then?” Shawn asks with a smirk from the seat beside you. “Because I think it suits you.”

“I'm not talking to you anymore.”

“You have to! You're my assistant and my best friend.” He slides his hand over yours on the arm rest between the two of you. “Please talk to me?”

You let his fingers curl around yours as you close your eyes. He always held your hand when the plane was taking off. It's just how it was. You needed something real to hold on to until you were in the air and he was always that something. “What am I supposed to say?”

“Just answer my question. Are you taking my last name?”

“Why does it matter? We're not actually married so who cares?”

“I care.”

You cut him and glare and he isn't even smiling like he was joking. “Why?”

“I just do. Hypothetically, would you take my name?”

“Yeah. Sure.”

Shawn looks satisfied with himself. You have no idea why that mattered. It wasn't like you were actually married. Well you were officiated but, y'know, whatever.

____________________

All hell breaks loose when you and Shawn walk into the central concourse of the airport you've landed at. The screams are deafening and louder than you've ever heard before. Jake tries to keep a minimum distance as you and Shawn make your way to the front doors with Andrew and the rest of the crew in tow.

“What is going on?!” You yell and Shawn falls back to put his arm around you and lean down to hear you. “I said what's going on?”

“No clue. People must be just extra excited to see me today.”

“Shawn! Shawn! Is it true?! Have you been in a secret relationship with your assistant for years?!”

Shawn looks over to the well dressed woman who's running alongside the group. She's asking all sorts of questions about you and Shawn. Obviously a reporter.

“Keep going!” Andrew yells over the crowd and comes up close behind you. “Don't answer any questions! Me and Brian will take your bags, just go!”

Shawn passes his suitcase to Brian and you give yours to Andrew. Shawn's hand finds yours and it's sweaty as he pulls you closer to Jake. He's nervous, anxious as his eyes start darting around to what you can only assume to be over a hundred people in the concourse. The two of you were used to crowds, it came with the job, but this was a swarm.

Jake pulls the two of you into a security office with help from some of the local airport security personnel. One moment you're in deafening loudness and the next it's muffled silence. Your ears are ringing and you feel like you've just survived an apocalypse. Shawn's hand is gripping yours so tight his knuckles are white and he's shaking.

“Shawn, hey,” you say softly and he looks down at you.

“Pull the blinds please,” Jake instructs to an officer by the door. She turns and pulls the blinds on the two floor to ceiling windows looking out to the hoard.  

You sit Shawn down in a rolling chair behind a desk covered in paperwork. “Hey, look at me bud.”

The two officers and Jake move to the farthest corner from the two of you and talk among each other about how to clear up the situation outside the door.

Shawn looks at you and you run your hand over his hair. “Sorry, I just got overwhelmed.”

“It's cool. You know you just have to tell me and we'll fix it.”

“That woman knew. She knew about us.”

Us. As if there was really something going on between the two of you.

“She doesn't know anything. People have speculated for years about us. She probably just saw us talking when we got through the gate.” You scratch his scalp gently as he leans his forehead against your stomach. “Relax, deep breaths. Wanna do a vocal warm up to let it out?”

“No, it's fine. I just want to get to the hotel as soon as possible.”

“Jake,” you look over and he looks at you. “What's the plan to get out of here?”

“Security is going to escort us out. They've got more people coming down here to help. Just a few minutes. I've let Andrew know we're alright.”

“Thank you.”

Shawn stands up and pulls you into a hug. He presses his nose into the top of your hair and sighs. “Sorry I keep making today so stressful for you.”

“No, Shawn, it's not your fault.” You rub up his back and down again. “Things happen. We'll be okay. We always are.”

_____________________

Turns out the news has broken and the world knows that you and Shawn allegedly got married. TMZ was first to announce so you're sure that the Elvis impersonator spilled his guts for a couple hundred dollars. That son of a bitch. As if Shawn wasn't already having a hell of a time with stress on tour, this had to happen.

You don't even want to go out of the hotel now. The comments on every social media platform are enough to make you want to peel your skin off. There's two types of people it seems. Ones that think you're amazing and ones that hate your guts. For the most part it's people hating you.

“We're going to get dinner, are you coming?” Shawn asks, poking his head into your room.

“I'm gonna stay in. I don't want to go out.”

“Is it because of the gossip?”

“Yeah. I'm tired of being called ugly, fat and worthless. Why give people more fodder to keep the fire burning?”

Shawn steps in and closes the door behind him. “Why are you reading that crap?”

“I can't avoid it. Everywhere I go it's all people are talking about.” You flip through your Twitter feed and hold it up for Shawn. “Oh this is my favorite, gold digging whore.”

Shawn stalks across the room and snatches the phone from your hand. He throws it into your suitcase and squats down in front of you. “They're jealous. Angry jealous people who have no idea who you are.” He takes your hands and kisses over your knuckles. “They have no idea how beautiful and smart and funny you are.”

“Shawn...you're just saying that.”

“I'm not.” He looks at you over your hands. “I'm honored to call you my wife, real or fake, it's an honor. Any man who marries you is lucky.”

Tears sting the corners of your eyes and you look down, lip trembling.

“Let's stay in. We can rent a movie on the TV and order something to be delivered.”

“No, you go with the guys.” You pull one hand out of his and wipe your wet cheeks. “I'm fine.”

“I won't go.” He stands and crawls on to the bed, sitting behind you and dragging you between his legs. “I'd rather spend my night with you then watch Brian try to pick up the bartender for three hours straight.”

"Can we get Chinese?"

"Of course." Shawn pulls his phone out and scrolls through Google to find a local place to deliver. "You want your usual?"

"Yeah. Extra dumplings if they have them."

He brings the phone up to his ear and smiles. "Anything you want."

____________________

Two days later. Heading to the venue where Shawn is playing isn't usually a stressful thing. You've done it countless times. But you've never done it with everyone thinking you're his wife. The back of the transit van is silent, uncomfortably so. Shawn is on his phone, Andrew and Brian are staring out the windows and Connor is messing with something on his camera.

You hold your bag tight against your lap and sigh. Shawn opens his his legs and bumps your thigh. You look up and he's smiling. “What are you doing?”

“Can you hand me my notebook?”

“Yeah sure.” You dig around in your little black backpack and produce his tattered leather bound journal. It's his writing notebook and if anyone besides you ever had it he would probably explode. “Got an idea?”

“Yeah, just something that's stuck in my head.” He takes it and slides the little pen out from the side and starts writing. He looks so focused as he scribbles away, striking things out and looking annoyed. His brain never stopped.

“Hey.”

You look away from Shawn to Connor who is across from the two of you and has his camera up right. “Yeah? Need something?”

“No, nevermind.”

“We're here,” Andrew says as the van comes to a halt.

Shawn closes the notebook and hands it over. “Are you nervous?”

“Are you?”

“Yeah but I have you, so it'll be okay.” He grabs your hand and squeezes. “Everyone ready?”

Everyone mumbles in unison and Jake pulls open the side door to the sound of fans yelling beyond the barriers a few yards away. No questions. No photos. Just straight into the venue.

The second you're inside the venue there are coordinators ushering you to the question and answer area that's set up in a meeting room. Usually sound check would come first but you had arrived a little later than planned due to traffic and now everything was off schedule.

Shawn goes out and the fans in the q&a scream and greet him. You take a seat behind curtain that is put up as a backdrop in the front area where Shawn sits. You open up your laptop and start working on the checklist for the show tonight while also looking up local gyms for Shawn while he's in town.

Twenty minutes pass and you hear Shawn say your name. You pull out your headphones and listen to what he's saying, wondering what the question was. He just wants a bottle of water and you grab one off a cart nearby.

You don't think anything of it when you walk out in front of everyone to hand him his water. You've done it a hundred times. You don't realize that you've really messed up until the fans are awwing and suddenly asking questions over each other.

“Did you guys get married for real?”

“How long have you been together?”

“Are you really his assistant?”  

Shawn sighs and you can see Jake who is off to the side next to you just shake his head. “I'm sorry, I didn't even think about it when I asked for water.”

“It's fine. Just act like everything is normal.” You grab his empty bottle and he pops open the top of the new one. “And don't answer any questions about me.”

“I promise I won't.”

You turn and walk away, giving a little wave to the fans as you go around the back again to take your place at your laptop on an amp box.

____________________

The next night you, Shawn and a couple of the guys go out to a bar near the hotel. It's a really upscale place, private too. It's nice being able to relax and just let loose the stress from the last few days and not have anyone recognize you for a few hours.

Drinks are flowing, music is playing, you are dancing with a couple people. It feels good. Someone's hands find your waist from behind and they pull you against their solid warm body. You stiffen up, not comfortable with the sudden contact.

“You smell really good.” Shawn murmurs against your hair. “Like really good.”

You relax, trusting him and no longer worrying about it being some stranger making a move. “I just washed my hair with my usual stuff.” You turn in his hold to face him and he drops his forehead against yours. His eyes are focused on you, a little glassy from alcohol and you wonder how many drinks he's had.

“You are so beautiful.” He smiles and closes his eyes. “You just...wow.”

“Shawn, you've had way too much.” You reach up and play with the curls at the back of his neck. You've had a few yourself. “I thought you weren't going to drink much because your next show is in three days.”

“I'll be fine.”

“It's not like you.”

“I just wanted to relax.” He leads you over to a lounge area with some couches and falls back on his ass, pulling you down on top of him.

You sit on his lap and he smiles at you like a cat who caught a canary. “What are you grinning about?”

“You.” He runs his hand up your back and you loop your arm around the back of his neck. “I wanna kiss you.” He leans up so he's face to face with you. “I want to kiss you all over.”

“Why?”

“Because I want to kiss my wife.” He grins.

You roll your eyes. “I'm not your wife doofus.”

He leans in closer and bumps his nose with yours, breath ghosting over your lips. You're too drunk to handle this right now. Everything in you wants him and it's so hard to say no. You've kissed before but it wasn't like this, well, it was. You were drunk then too but it wasn't in public and with speculation of being married hanging in the air.

“This is a bad idea,” you whisper, eyes going to his pink lips and he shakes his head slightly. “Yes it is.”

“Stop talking.” He leans in and kisses you, hands going to your hair as he licks into your mouth. You take a deep breath and re-position yourself so you're straddling his thighs. He drops one hand to your waist and you feel like you just can't get enough. You can't seem to break away from him as he kisses you better than anyone you've ever been with. You know the two of you will end up going back to the hotel together, there was absolutely no doubt about that at this point. It's just a matter of how far this was going to go.

____________________

The next morning you wake up and it's like deja vu. Shawn's arm is across your stomach and your head hurts. Only this time you remember the night before. You remember walking with Shawn back to the hotel and making out in the elevator. Fumbling with his key card to get his room open. And then watching him literally collapse on the bed and pass out. You knew he'd had way too much.

“Morning,” you says softly, running your hand through his hair. He rubs his face into his pillow and groans at the morning light. “Hungover?”

“Very. My head is throbbing.”

“Let me help.” You sit up and guide him to lay his head on a pillow you pull over onto your lap. You massage your fingers into his temples and he groans softly.

“You're the best.”

“Mmhmm.” You massage over his eyes and cheeks and he just let's his jaw go slack. He's so soft like this, trusting in you completely. The last few days have been a wild ride and gone farther than your professional relationship with him should go. It's like since finding out you got hitched by the Elvis impersonator, all inhibitions were gone. The line between coworker and relationship was getting blurrier by the second and you have to redraw it before it is too late.

“You're a really good kisser.” Shawn mumbles, smiling to himself.

“So you remember some of last night?”

“Mmm yeah.” He opens his eyes and you stop rubbing his temples. “You can't deny that there's something more between us.”

“I can't, but there shouldn't be.” You return to rubbing and go down around the back of his neck eliciting a soft moan from him. “I'm your assistant first and foremost. We need to remember that.”

“Yeah.” He says softly, closing his eyes again. You know he isn't going to cave that easily. It's not like him to drop a subject just like that but you know he doesn't want to argue or anything with his head killing him. And that's just fine.

____________________

Shawn wraps his arms around you from behind and walks with his head on your shoulder. "What're you going to get?"

"I don't know, we came for you to get stuff."

"Yeah, but...I know you want something."

The two of you round the corner to the health care isle in the little 24 hour convenience store. The two of you had come down for snacks after Shawn said he needed some jerky and a Snickers. The funny thing is that those two things were your usual period cravings, and you happen to be on your period.

"Shawn, did you want to come here because of me?"

"What do you mean?" He pulls away and grabs a box of Tylenol off the shelf to toss into the bag you're carrying.

"Come on. Snickers and jerky? That's my craving snack."

Shawn grins sheepishly and rubs the back of his neck. "Am I that obvious?"

You roll your eyes. "You're transparent."

He walks over and puts his arm around your shoulders. "I just wanted to help. I saw you were having bad cramps earlier during rehearsal."

"Is that why you brought me tea from the catering cart?"

"Yeah."

You lean your head on his chest. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." He kisses your head. "Lets get those snacks and head back."

____________________

“You're still wearing the ring,” Shawn says, pointing to your hand curled around the clipboard you're holding. The second show this week is about to start and he's getting his in ears put in.

“So?”

“So? Why didn't you take it off? It's been like five days.”

You shrug and touch the little rose gold band. “It's pretty. I guess I didn't notice.” You point at his hand and he has one of his gold bands around his ring finger still too. “What's your excuse?”

Shawn shrugs. “I guess I didn't notice.”

You narrow your eyes at him and he grins. “Maybe you want to be married to me.”

“Maybe you do too.”

“In your dreams.”

“I've had a lot of dreams come true y'know.” Shawn laughs and goes to the side stage to get ready to go on. You follow him over and touch his arm gently. “Hmm?”

“I forgot to tell you to have a good show.”

He leans over and kisses your cheek, making your heart race. “Always do.”

“Pinkies for luck?”

Shawn hooks his pinky with yours and the rings click together, making him grin. You pull away and run your hand over his hair to fluff it up as the band starts playing his intro. He keeps smiling at you and walks out on to stage, bringing his mic up to greet everyone in the arena. You twist the ring around on your finger and it sends an ache through your chest. Why hadn't you taken it off?

____________________

The show is going great and you are beaming at him the whole time. He keeps doing this thing where he looks over at you and you try to keep out of view so people don't know what he's looking at. Connor asks if you'll follow him during Bad Reputation because he doesn't want to hit anything while he watches the camera screen. You've done it several times and you know all you have to do is literally walk behind him and tell him if he's going to hit an amp or something.

Zubin and Shawn are going to town on the guitar when it happens. You're following Connor but he's walking too quick, your eyes are on Shawn as he does a little grabby hand wave at you and you trip on a set of cables sticking out off the light box at the base of the stage. You go sprawling, scraping your knees on the hard concrete floor of the arena.

“Fucking shit!” you yell as you turn over and dust yourself off. Your jeans are torn in the knees and there's blood starting to stain on the left one.

Suddenly Shawn is by your side, guitar on his back as he kneels down beside you. “Are you okay? I saw you go down behind Connor.”

“What're you doing!? Get back up there!”

“It's fine Zubin is doing his thing.” Shawn puts an arm behind your back and the other under knees, lifting you up bridal style. “Ah shit your knee is bleeding.”

“Put me down. I'm fine.”

“No you're not! Look at your knee!”

You glance down and yeah your jeans were pretty much destroyed by the big bloody patch. It was starting to ache too, a dull throb right over your knee cap. “You're really not helping with the rumors right now y'know.”

“I really don't care.” Shawn places you gently on an equipment box backstage as Jake and one of the stage hands come over with a first aid kit.

“I'll be fine. Go back out there.” He starts to protest and you grab his face and force him to look at you. “Leave me and go do the show.”

Shawn leans in and kisses your lips quickly before turning and running back out on stage. Your heart stops and you are left in a stunned state, just gawking off at the stage. Did he really just kiss you? What the hell? He...you weren't...fuck.

“Hey, hello!” The stage hand, Nick, waves his hand in your face. “I can't clean it with your jeans on. Can we go to the catering room or something and have you take them off?”

“Yeah....yeah sure.” You bring your focus back to your knee and as you try to stand up on it, you wobble. Nick supports you as you head for the inner concourse and Jake stays behind.

“I'll tell him where you are when he gets done, don't worry,” Jake says with a smile. You know he seen the kiss, hell, anyone in the vicinity saw it. Shawn was not making this easy.  

As soon as the show ends Shawn is in the catering room with you. He's pretty sweaty when he comes in but you don't really care because he's got eyes for no one but you. He kneels down beside you and cradles your knee in his big hands, fingers ghosting over the gauze wrapped skin.

“You had to cut your jeans?” He asks, sliding his hand over your thigh where your jeans are cut off just over the wound.

“Yeah. I couldn't get my jeans off and they were already ruined.”

“Let me carry you to the car.”

“Shawn I can walk. It's not that bad now.”

He gives you a hard look. “You're hurt.”

“It's just a scraped knee.”

“Please, let me carry you. You're my w- it's my fault. If you hadn't been watching me wave at you, you wouldn't have tripped.”

You sigh, defeated. “I'm not going to change your mind am I?”

“Nope.” Shawn gets up and picks you up bridal style again, holding you close to his chest. You can smell his shampoo from his damp hair, curls falling in his face. “Let's go, I'll have one of the guys bring my stuff.”

“I need my bag.”

Shawn leans down and you grab your backpack off the couch you were sitting on. With that he carries you alongside Jake as he heads for the cars out back.

The second you get to the doors you see a bunch of fans waiting around to hopefully get a picture with Shawn beyond the security fence. The fans start screaming as soon as he walks out in the open carrying you toward the car. They’re waving and calling out both of your names as camera flashes go off.

“You can go ahead and take pictures.” You say to Shawn and he shakes his head. “Seriously, just drop me off in the car. I'll wait.”

“No. I want to go back to the hotel and shower and relax with you. Besides they've got their pictures.” He grins.

“Shawn.” You touch his cheek and he leans into your hand. “Please. I know you want to go say hi.”

“I do, but I really want to relax too.” Jake opens the door for Shawn and he lowers you to your feet and helps you into the car. “And relaxing comes first today.”

____________________

“Hey, are you feeling up to going out?”

You raise your eyebrows and he smiles sheepishly, knowing that you're not supposed to be seen together alone until the whole marriage thing blows over, but you're still his friend and assistant and honestly that concept of hiding it had gone out the window days ago. “Like...where?”

“Ed's in town. He texted me and asked if I want to hang out and see the show tonight.”

“Sure. Anyone else going?”

“I think Brian is gonna go.”

“What time?”

“Around seven.”

“I'll see you then.”

The concert is loud as hell, just like Shawn's are. You're stood in a private section with a few other people from Ed's crew and it's just you and Shawn. Brian didn't ever show up, and honestly you think Shawn didn't actually invite him.

Nearly forty minutes pass and Ed ends castle on the hill and starts up the chords to Perfect, his final song on the set list. Shawn wraps his arms around you from behind and you look up at him.

“I found a love, for me...” Shawn sings along softly with Ed.

“You planned this didn't you?”

“Planned what?”

“Being here together and without Brian. This is a date, isn't it?”

Shawn rolls his eyes. “A date? Really? We're just seeing Ed.”

“A concert can be a date y'know.”

“Shh.” Shawn lays his chin on your head and starts humming along to the song. The arena is dark and everyone has their phones out, swaying along to the song. It's beautiful. “Dancing in the dark, with you between my arms.” He sings softly against your head and you hold onto his arms now wrapped around your shoulders.

You take his hand and he turns you around, stepping back and grinning at you. He keeps singing as he slow dances with you, swinging you out and bringing you close in time with the music. “You're ridiculous,” you laugh and he just holds you against him.

“You love it,” he says quietly, turning you around once more and pulls you back against his chest. “And you look perfect...tonight.”

The song comes to an end and you hold Shawn's hands in yours. He kisses the side of your head and you're absolutely gone for him. He's knows it. You know it. The whole damn world probably knows it by now. ____________________

“Where's my notebook?”

“In the suitcase.” You point to his bulky black bag. “Outer pocket.”

Shawn digs into the bag and brings it out, taking a seat on the edge of the bed and writing furiously. You learned ages ago not to bother asking what was in that little journal. You know usually it's lyrics or little bits or inspiration. You never read it, no matter how many times he has you carry it in your bag, you never ever open that book.

“We've got to get going Shawn. Can you write in the car?”

“No.”

You drag his bag off the bed and over to the door. Yours is already there waiting, you had brought it over to save you from grabbing it later after helping Shawn get everything together.

“The plane won't wait.”

Shawn looks up and rolls his eyes. “Just a moment.”

“Alright.” You lean against the door and close your eyes. You're exhausted, the concert with Ed had ended up going until around nine and then visiting lasted until well after midnight. Every time Shawn and Ed got together it was like a recording session. The two were definitely of the same bunch. Now you had a six hour flight to get on back to Toronto.

“I’m ready.” Shawn whispers in your ear and your eyes fly open and you jump, making him laugh. “Let's go home.”

You swat at his chest and he grabs his bag handle. “You're such a turd.”

“I just like teasing you. Come on.”

The two of you head down to the lobby to meet Andrew and Brian and the rest of the crew. “So, what're you writing in that book?”

“Curious?”

“Well yeah, that's why I'm asking. I know usually you don't tell anyone. You've just seemed very engrossed in it lately.”

“I've been writing lyrics. I want to meet up with Teddy and see if we can't get something together. I've just...got this feeling and I want to put it into words.”

You round the corner to the lobby and Andrew looks up from his phone. “About time you two.”

“Leave the love birds alone, don't you know, they're newlyweds.” Brian teases, dragging his suitcase around behind the two of you toward the doors.

“Fuck off Brian!” Shawn yells and you elbow him for yelling in the lobby.

The rest of the trip home goes smoothly, you sleep on the plane with Shawn leaning against you and it's possibly the best sleep you've had in a few days. Landing back in Toronto is a bit annoying, as fans have come to meet you and Shawn at the airport like usual. Only now they're rowdier than ever due to the news about your alleged marriage.

"Don't pay attention to any of it." Shawn says, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and staring down at your phone. You've just arrived at his apartment and you'll be leaving tomorrow to go to your own place in New York. "We'll just lay low and then in a few weeks it'll all be over."

"Yeah I guess. How exactly do we convince fans we aren't hitched?"

"Probably should take off the rings."

You pocket your phone and hold your hand out in front of you. Honestly you've grown accustomed to the little ring on your finger. It fits so comfortably.

“Maybe being married isn't such a bad thing.”

You look up from your hand to where Shawn is now across the bedroom lying on the bed on his stomach. “What?”

“I mean, aren't we already kind of married?”

“No?”

“Think about it. You know more about me than anyone. You can read me like an open book. We're always together, I trust you more than anyone and we definitely have chemistry. We have such a connection, it's insane. Maybe it's not such a bad idea.”

You close your eyes and sigh softly. “You cannot be serious. We can't be married. We just can't. I'm your assistant, not your wife.”

“Technically you're both right now.”

“Shawn. It wasn't a legal binding ceremony.”

He gets up and walks over to you, taking your hands in his. “Come on. You'd get so many benefits as my wife. You could come to awards shows with me, walk red carpets, be on my health care plan. I can also avoid the “when are you going to have a girlfriend?” conversations. I really don't see any downsides.”

“Really? No downsides? What about dating? What about falling in love and wanting to marry someone for real? I can do pretty much all that other stuff as your assistant if you want me to. None of it has to do with me being your wife or not. And why don't you have a girlfriend? You're like the most eligible bachelor in history. Rich, gorgeous, young and talented. What's the deal?”

“You know why I don't. Besides I don't want to marry someone else.”

“What? Are you kidding me? Why the hell would you want to marry me in the first place? And on that note, no, I don't know why you don't have a girlfriend, besides being on tour and stuff.”

“You really don't get it do you?”

“For the love of God, why can't you stop talking in riddles for like five minutes?”

“It’s because I'm in love with you.”

Your heart stops. He doesn't mean it like that. He can't. He isn't allowed to. No. He can't. You didn't want to hear those actual words, it made it all too real.

“Shawn, I think you really need to think about that. You can't just say that lightly.”

“I have thought about it.” He walks you over to the couch just past the doorway into the living room. “It's all I think about all the time. I've wanted to tell you for the last three years but how do you tell your assistant that sort of thing? And I wanted to be sure you felt the same, or you at least had an interest in me. You're hard to read though. I could never figure out what you were thinking until this last year, hell, the last few weeks when I realized you've been holding back.”

“Shawn... I-I don't know.”

He takes your hand and threads his fingers between yours. “Don't hold back. Do you want to be with me?”

“I mean, yeah, of course. More than anything Shawn, but...we can't.”

“We can. We absolutely can.”

"But my job and the fans...it's a lot to handle."

"And yet we've been doing it for the last week basically."

“I...I should go.” You pull your hand away and stand. You grab your bag and head for the door. There isn't really anywhere to go besides your place. The second you get out the front doors you call a cab. It wasn't as if you didn't feel the same way about him, because you did. It's just...it would never work. If you mixed your job with your relationship it could end badly. That's what you've been telling yourself anyway. There's a line, a very clear line, and you can't bring yourself to cross it...though you've definitely been bending over it a bit. Well, maybe a lot.

____________________

The sun is just starting to set as you take your seat on a plane flying to New York. You're alone, carry-on bag in the compartment over your seat. You called and talked to Andrew about what happened. He was fine with it, in fact he'd rather Shawn be with you then deal with bringing a whole new person into the picture, but you still don't think it's for the best. Four years, four long amazing years and just like that you find yourself out of a job and heading back to your hometown.

You didn't say goodbye to Shawn. You couldn't. The next time you see him will be...well, no, you don't know when that might be. You lean your head back and fight the tears welling up in the corners of your eyes. You want to stay, you do, but you can't hurt Shawn if things go bad or just don't work out. The stress and tension that would put on your professional relationship would be too much. You won't break his heart, you just won't.

You put on your headphones, lean your head back and put on a sleep mask. If you just tuned it out you would be fine. Minutes pass and you feel the plane start to move, taxiing to the runway for take off. You feel your nerves getting the best of you, hand curled around the end of the arm rest. You never flew alone, you always flew with Shawn.

A hand covers yours and you jump, jerking away. You pull your sleep mask off to see who the hell thought it was okay to touch you. Your heart drops when you see Shawn in the seat beside you.

“What the hell are you doing?” He asks, irritation evident in his voice.  

“I'm going home.”

“You're running away.”

“I'm not. It's for the best.”

“The best for who?.”

You look away and clench your jaw. “You don't get it Shawn.”

He reaches over and turns your head to look at him. “No, you don't get it. You are running away because you're scared. You're scared to admit that we have something special because you're afraid it won't work out. But let me tell you what, you've seen me at my worst and my best and I've seen you in both lights as well. I think you know just as well as I do that we're meant to be together.”

“But what if it doesn't work out?”

“And what if it does? You can't try and take the safe route every time. There is nothing about our relationship that says it won't work. Please, do you know how hard it was to be told that you quit all of a sudden? That after spending a good part of four years together, you were just going to walk out of my life? Do you know how bad that hurt?”

“I just thought it'd be easier. I didn't want to hurt you.”

Shawn pushes up the arm rest and scoots closer to you. “Nothing is going to be easy. It never is.” He grabs your hand and threads his fingers between yours. “Please don't leave. You're my best friend. You don't want to hurt me but this, leaving, is going to kill me.”

“How'd you find me?"

"You always fly Delta when you go home. I just checked for a flight to New York and got a ticket. It doesn't matter."

You sigh and lean your head on his shoulder. "You really want to do this?"

"Yes. And we don't have to be married, we can just date. I just want you in my life, please."

"I want you in mine too." You hold his face and he tilts your head up to kiss you gently. "I suppose we're just a little backwards on all this, getting married and then dating."

"I guess this is where we start then."

You smile and he kisses you again, and again and again.

_____________________

Three months later

"Babe, did you get the email from Teddy about the song?" Shawn asks as he pulls on a suit jacket.

You glance over at his stylist who's holding up two shirts to the jacket. Shawn is standing there with his arms out like a dork while she works her magic. "I haven't gotten any emails from her. I have one from Connor though?"

"What's Connor sent? It must be a big file if he can't text it."

"Let me open it." You click the link and it opens a video in the media player on your laptop. The playback opens with you sitting on Shawn's shoulders at capital summertime ball, the moment Shawn had on his lock screen photo. From there it cuts to you and Shawn backstage playing slaps before a show and him squealing every time you faked him out. Then it's the two of you sharing a strawberry shake from McDonald's. You remember that day, he said he didn't want anything and ended up stealing half of your order.  

"What is it?" Shawn asks, sliding off the suit jacket and walking over to lean on the back of the couch.

On the screen you and Shawn pose like goofballs in his new merch for the tour. The two of you sleeping on a couch backstage at some event. Shawn putting his jacket over your shoulders during a late night video shoot. Then there is recently, the two of you in the back of the car when he asked for his notebook. You can see that Shawn is stealing glances as he writes, something you hadn't noticed at the time. There's footage of Shawn at the concert jumping off stage to pick you up after you tripped. And finally, the last little bit is when the two of you were boarding the plane home and you grab Shawn's hand as you walk through the boarding tunnel.

"Wow..." You laugh softly, covering your mouth. "We're so transparent."

"Connor...he really did that." Shawn leans over and kisses your cheek. "I guess everyone knew we were together before we did."

"Yeah. Obviously."

"I'm going to have Teddy send you a copy of the new song." He turns back to his stylist and she holds out his shirt she's chosen. "I want you to listen to it tonight and tell me what you think."

"This is the song you've been keeping top secret for the last month?"

He grins sheepishly. "Yes, I promise it's worth it."

"Your songs are always worth it. I'm pretty sure you've never written a bad song."

"You're so sweet."

"Only to you."

_____________________

Shawn goes out to sit at some awards show and you stay behind in the green room. You've had enough with award shows in the last few years. They're usually too loud and full of cringey dialogue. You put in your head phones and press play on the file that Teddy sent to you. She didn't send any explanation other than a little winking smiley face and honestly you're suspicious. Shawn has never kept a song from you before.

"Put my heart on the line so many times, but when I'm with you I know I'll be fine. I'm falling, falling in love with you. Can't stop this feeling I know it's true."

Your eyes go wide as you realize this song is definitely about you. "Oh my God. Shawn..." You laugh to yourself as you begin to tear up. It's catchy and touching and...how dare he.

You finish the song and go to find him out in the crowded ballroom. You make your way through the room full of people and find his spot empty near the front next to Ed and his wife.

"Where is Shawn?" You ask Ed and he points toward the doors you came through saying he got up a few minutes ago.

You turn and double back to see if he's in the bathroom but there is absolutely no one in the halls.

"Honey, what're you doing?" Shawn laughs, and you turn to see him walking out of the green room. "I thought you wanted to chill in the back, I came to see how you were doing."

You walk up to him and he puts his arms around you. "You wrote a song about me."

"Yes I did."

"Everyone is going to know."

Shawn grins and runs his hand up your back. "Yes they will."

"A song!"

"Yes. You inspire me, I couldn't not write something about how I've felt for ages. Teddy helped me make it into something amazing. I'm really excited to release it."

You lay your hand on his cheek and he leans into it. "You're lucky I love you."

He kisses you softly and smiles. "What're you doing later?"

"Going to the after party with you?"

"Yeah, well I heard there's a wedding going on here tomorrow. Maybe the officiator will be around."

"Shawn."

"Maybe I should make you a legal Canadian citizen this time around." He grins and you narrow your eyes at him. "What do you think?"

"I think you're soft."

He slides his hand into yours and brings it up to kiss your joined hands. "It's been almost three and a half months and you haven't taken off my ring."

You flush and look away. "Yeah well...it's nice."

"Mmhmm."

"Okay, yeah...I want to be more than your girlfriend." You smile and look up at him. "I've wanted it for ages, but isn't it a little fast?"

"I don't think building up to this for three years is fast."

"You're right...I've just been thinking about it as the last few months but it has been years hasn't it?" You chuckle and shake your head. "Are you proposing to me then?"

"Yes." He drops down on one knee and reaches into his jacket pocket. "Will you be my wife, my assistant and my best friend?"

"You...have a ring on you?"

"Yeah I...I got it a while back." He looks at the ring and up at you. "I've just been carrying it around and waiting for the right moment to give it to you."

"You're such a sap."

"Yeah but, you already knew that. So, tell me, will you be my everything?"

You slide off Shawn's ring and pick up the ring from its box and slide it over your ring finger. "Yes. Yes I will."

Shawn stands and cups your face, kissing you softly. "I love you."

"I love you too."

The end.

__________________

Thank you so much for reading! Please reblog if you read and if you enjoyed it. 

Shout out to @shawnm521 for help and inspiration with this one, you are seriously the ultimate muse and I couldn’t be more grateful. 

Please let me know what you think, what your favorite parts are and more via ask, reblog, reply or message. Thank you again!

-A

[mindingmyownbusiness]

Rescue (3/?)

Pairing - Bucky x Reader Soulmate AU Summary - You’ve always believed your soulmate was out there somewhere, Bucky not so much. What happens when he finally takes a leap of faith and reaches out to you? Warnings - some canon-typical violence in later chapters, the occasional curse word, but I promise to make up for it with loads of fluffiness Chapter Word Count - 1177 Notes - I’m hoping to post new chapters about once a week so wish me luck (and any encouragement you can offer is always welcome!). Inspired by Rescue by Lauren Daigle and by a lot of the concepts in Sense8.

Series Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2

His POV

Bucky sat on the edge of his bed, Sam’s words swirling in his brain. After this morning Bucky didn’t know what to think but all day he’d felt as though something was tugging at him, a literal pull in his chest. He felt unsettled and now was practically desperate for answers. The internet wasn’t much help, soulmates were a polarizing subject. So many people didn’t seem to have one and were very vocal about denying that soulmates even existed while those who claimed to have a soulmate were just as insistent that they were very real. At this point Bucky was ready to try anything. If something came out of it that would be great, if not then he’d schedule an extra therapy appointment for himself this week and work out his nightmare issues there. 

“How do I do this anyway? Just ‘give consent’? It can’t be that easy…” He hung his head, laughing at himself.  “Great now I’m talking to myself.” Letting out a slow breath he looked around the room, his eye catching on a small candle that Wanda had given him when she was helping him through some meditation exercises. “Maybe I just need to focus, get rid of distractions, clear my mind and see if she’s really out there.” 

A few moments later, candle lit, lights dimmed, his fan creating a soothing white noise in the background, he sat cross-legged on his bed and stared into the flame. He took several slow, deep breaths, willing his body to relax and just be in the moment. As he watched the light flicker he pictured her face, her smile, he focused on the feelings he would get in his dreams, that warmth in his chest. He concentrated on the thought that she wanted to talk to him, she wanted the connection, she wanted… him. And then he simply listened.

Your POV

You hummed to yourself as you moved through your kitchen, fixing your favorite cozy drink of peppermint hot cocoa and keeping an eye on the brownies that were almost done baking. “I’m so glad I took the day off today. Yesterday was a literal nightmare and hey, who doesn’t need a mental health day every now and then?” You paused, the feelings from yesterday gathering like storm clouds in the distance. The brownie timer going off brought you back to the present and you moved swiftly to pull out the sweet treats before they baked too long. 

“Nope, nope, nooooope, not gonna dwell on yesterday! I feel bad enough that I doubted you at all, it’s really not fair to you, is it? I would hate for you to think I’d given up on us before there was an ‘us’… now that would be truly awful.” You set the pan to the side to cool, returning to your cocoa mission. “I just… is it weird to say that I miss you? I know we’ve never met, never even spoken but… gosh I miss you anyways.” You poured yourself a mug, adding a generous amount of mini marshmallows, and stood at your window looking out over the city. “I wonder where you are right now, how your day is going. Are you taking a mental health day too? Do you even have the kind of job where you need one?” You hummed as you blew across your cocoa and took a sip. “I wish I knew something about you, other than the fact that I already love you of course,” you smiled and laughed to yourself, sighing softly. “But you know what I really wish? That you were here, right now. That we could cuddle on my couch and catch up on stupid reality TV shows while we gorge ourselves on brownies and make ourselves sick on cocoa and marshmallows. Now that? That sounds like the best day ever…”

His POV

Quiet. Too quiet. Bucky was beginning to feel frustration creeping in. “Why isn’t this working?” he groaned. “And there I go talking to myself again. Maybe I’m losing my mind after all…” He laid back on his bed, abandoning the candle idea and staring at his ceiling instead. “She seems to want me to know she’s there, but… do I really want it too? Am I ready to really believe in this stuff?” He let those thoughts roll around in his head a bit. “Maybe Sam wasn’t kidding about the consent stuff, maybe… maybe we both have to want something to make it happen.” He sat straight up realizing that if he was serious about finding out the truth that he was going to have to take a leap of faith, true faith in his potential soulmate. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and spoke into the darkness, “As hard as it is for me to believe that the universe thinks I deserve this, cause God knows I don’t think I do, I can’t deny these signs, these feelings anymore. If you are out there--- no, no I know you’re out there so please, I-I want to know you. I need to hear your voice. I know you’re there. Please... ”

Bucky’s words echoed around his empty room as every fiber of his body strained to listen. And then... there was something, something like… humming? But very faint and as if it was coming from under water. He held his breath, waiting patiently as the sounds grew... now someone was talking? Something about… a nightmare? His eyes flew open but all he saw was the candle and the darkness of his room. The voice was becoming clearer. Who are they talking to? He thought to himself.

“I know we’ve never met, never even spoken but… gosh I miss you anyways.” Is she… is she talking about me? To me...? Bucky shook his head as the voice suddenly became crystal clear. And not just that but he could hear her moving around, hear the clink of a spoon against a mug, the sound of an oven opening and closing, even the sounds of the traffic and the city outside of wherever she was. She sounded like she was right there, in his room, close enough to touch, her voice giving him that same warmth he’d felt countless times in his dreams. The realization floored him. This was her. His soulmate. Unbelievable...

“I wish I knew something about you, other than the fact that I already love you of course,” he could hear her laugh to herself and then sigh softly. “But you know what I really wish? That you were here, right now. That we could cuddle on my couch and catch up on stupid reality TV shows while we gorge ourselves on brownies and make ourselves sick on cocoa and marshmallows. Now that? That sounds like the best day ever…”

“It sure does, doll.” He couldn’t help himself, it just slipped out as naturally as if he’d said it to her a thousand times. But then he froze as he heard her gasp sharply followed by a crash and then, nothing.

Part 4