#if i was exhausted all day or somethin. and then id wake up at like FOUR IN THE MORNING

[felidthing]

i wish being illnessed up meant i would wake up at like 2pm today but noooo. 6am. fuck you. i took some benadryl at like 10 fell asleep pretty quickly woke up at 12-somethin to my friend giving me a cookie fell back alseep until 6. this is why i dont go to sleep at a normal time i always wake up stupid early

[obeyme-kaidii-writes]

Sleep

Mammon x gn!MC

Words - 2286

Content warnings - none, just lots of fluff and humor, platonic relationships

Prompt/Inspiration - AO3 request

Summary -  Mammon starts sleeping in your room at night, and you notice a peculiar habit of his.

AO3

You were a light sleeper. A very, very light sleeper.

There had been several times during your stay at the House of Lamentation when Mammon scared the living daylights out of you by crawling into your bed in the middle of the night. Eventually, you just flat out told Mammon that he had to sleep with you because you were not going to be able to rest otherwise. He stuttered and blushed and fumbled over his words, denying that he had any idea what you were talking about, but in the end, he had taken up semi-permanent residence in your room.

When you start sharing a bed with someone on a regular basis, you begin to learn a lot about them that you wouldn’t know otherwise. Like whether they hog the blankets, if they prefer sheets over thick comforters, if they snore. And you, likewise, started to notice some very peculiar traits of Mammon’s.

For example, he preferred to sleep entirely nude. Of course now that he was sleeping in your room most of the time, he made the effort to wear something. But it wasn’t unusual for him to wake up in noticeably fewer clothes than when he had fallen asleep.

One night in particular, you were about to learn yet another thing about Mammon.

————

Mammon had fallen asleep long before you, and you had stayed up to keep reading a book you had borrowed from Satan. As you got sleepier and sleepier you realized that maybe it was time you called it a night. So you rolled over to turn your lamp off, only to find that you couldn’t reach it because a certain demon of Greed was starfished on the bed, essentially trapping you in a corner.

You thought for a moment about what you should do about this situation you found yourself in. At first, you didn’t want to disturb Mammon. His sleeping face was just so cute! But you were tired. And despite the fact he looked absolutely adorable next to you now, this was the same little shit that woke you up frequently for reasons much more frivolous.

“Pssst, Mammon. Wake up,” you nudged him with your elbow. When he didn’t stir, you gave him a bit of a kick with your foot. And when he still didn’t wake up, you put your hand on his shoulder and gently shook him.

“Wassup?” he finally answered as he sat up in bed.

“Turn off the light.”

“‘K.”

Having successfully woken him up, and trusting that he could manage a light switch on his own, you rolled over, turning your back to him, preparing to go to sleep. But after a good minute or two, you realized the light was still on. So you rolled over halfway, and repeated your request.

“Mammon, the light.”

“Right. Right. Gotcha.” And with that he finally reached over to the lamp and flicked it off, before snuggling back into your blankets and curling up behind you.

————

The following morning, you were the first to wake up. You looked over to Mammon, who was still taking up a good ¾ of the bed, and you couldn’t help but smile. It really was nice waking up with someone else beside you. Even if that someone was a bed hog.

When Mammon woke up a few minutes later, it was only to find you staring at him. He blushed awkwardly as he looked away, which just made you laugh.

“Whattaya lookin’ at?”

“Oh just a cute demon, hogging the bed.”

“Oh...uh...sorry,” he replied, pulling his limbs to himself as he rolled on his side away from you.

“It’s fine. So long as you are willing to turn the light off for me,” you said, smiling and laughing softly, as you snuggled up next to Mammon, wrapping your arm around his waist and spooning him from behind.

“The light?”

“Yeah, like last night when I was reading. If you’re gonna hog the bed, then be prepared to be woken up to turn off the light.”

Mammon rolled over a little to get a better look at you, certain that you had to be teasing him or setting him up for a joke or...something. But you were just smiling at him like normal.

“What’s up?” you asked.

“I dunno whatcha talkin’ about. I didn’t turn off a light last night.”

“Umm yeah you did. You even sat up and talked to me.”

“Noooo I didn’t…” he furrowed his brow in confusion. What on earth were you trying to pull?

“Ok fine. It doesn’t matter. The deal still stands. Hog the bed, be put on light switch duty. K?” you asked, leaning forward to give him a quick peck on the cheek, something that you knew would fluster him.

“Uh yep. Got it. Light switch duty,” he said as he rolled back over to hide his face from you. Without even meaning to, he shifted back slightly so that he was pressed more fully against you, and you simply smiled and hugged him in return. You were such a brat sometimes...kissing him on the cheek like that out of nowhere. You could at least warn him. Not that he liked it or anything.

While you did find it a little odd that Mammon didn’t remember the light incident, you just wrote it off as one of those things. It’s not like it mattered whether or not he remembered, anyways.

————

A few days later, you returned to your room after a study session with Satan only to find Mammon already passed out on your bed, once again leaving very little space for you. It occurred to you then that perhaps he was doing this on purpose so that you’d have to sleep practically on top of him, so you decided to have a bit of fun.

Instead of crawling over him, you climbed in next to him by the edge of your bed, and poked him in the side.

His reaction was immediate. He sat up and rubbed at his eyes...and then he just sat there.

“Mammon? You can lay back down.”

He mumbled something.

“Mammon?”, you sat up to get a better look at him. His eyes were open, but only just, and his gaze was unfocused, “You can lay down now.”

“I don’t wanna,” he whined.

“Mammon, are you still asleep?”, you had heard of sleepwalking before, but this was a whole new level of weird.

“Nooo.”

Sensing that it was perhaps better not to argue with him, you laid down in your bed and tugged on his shirt to get him to join you, “Come cuddle with me then so I can go to sleep.”

Without further complaint, Mammon complied and curled up next to you, resting his head on your chest and wrapping his arm around your middle. It didn’t take him long at all to fall back asleep, leaving you even more certain that he must not have been fully awake to begin with.

————

After that, there weren’t any more unusual episodes with Mammon for awhile, so you had almost forgotten about the whole thing.

That is until one night when you had been just about to fall asleep, and a notification came thru in your DDD. Usually you would put your device on silent when going to sleep, but tonight you had been so exhausted that you forgot. So when the notification went off - it was LOUD.

Mammon immediately sat up, dazed.

“Sorry about that,” you said, turning the sound off on your DDD.

“Fin stis.”

“Huh?”

“Den sai tis id.”

“Mammon, I think you are asleep.”

“Noooo! Am not!!!”, Mammon replied, as he started to act like he was about to get out of bed. Concerned about the sort of trouble he could get himself in while in this state you tried your best to stop him.

“Mammon, where are you going?”

He didn’t answer, but at least he stopped trying to get up.

“I think you’re asleep. Please, don’t get up.”

“I’m not asleep!” he snapped. You were surprised by the tone of voice he was using with you. Yeah he was loud and yelled a bunch, but you had never seen him actually angry with you. Not wanting to provoke him further, you decide to drop the issue and try what had worked the last time this happened.

“Ok Mammon, then just cuddle with me.”

“Fine.”

“Yeah, just lay back down with me so I can sleep.”

There was incoherent grumbling from Mammon as he wiggled back under the covers, still clearly annoyed with you for accusing him of being asleep when he knew he wasn’t.

“We can talk in the morning. Just cuddle for now.”

Once he was laying down again, you cuddled up next to him and wrapped your arm around his waist, hoping it would at least give you some warning if he would try to get up again.

————

“Sooooo, Mammon. Do you remember last night?”

“Huh?” Mammon turned around to look at you from his seat on the floor by your bed. It was Saturday morning, and he was browsing Akuzon on his DDD, trying to decide what to buy with his latest modeling paycheck. You had been laying on your bed, “helping” him with his shopping by occasionally texting him suggestions that you found. They might not have been the most helpful suggestions, but at least they were making the two of you laugh.

“You yelled at me,” you said, turning off your DDD and turning your head to look at Mammon.

“Whattya talkin’ about?? Why would I yell at you??”

“Because I told you that you were sleeping.”

“You’re makin’ that up.”

“Mammon, have you ever had trouble with sleepwalking?” you were genuinely curious if perhaps some of the things he got accused of were the result of him wandering the House of Lamentation unconsciously in the middle of the night.

“Huh?! No! Of course not! What are ya trying to pull? Seriously, is this like a joke or somethin’?”

“No, I’m telling you - you got woken up by a notification on my DDD, and when I tried to get you to go back to sleep, you yelled at me.”

“There’s no way that happened. I woulda remembered it.” Mammon eyed you suspiciously. He was sure this had to be a prank of some sort, though he couldn’t for the life of him figure out what the punch line would be. Why were you being so insistent?

“Well it did,” you mumbled under your breath. If he was going to be so stubborn, you were just going to have to prove it to him. The next time - you were going to catch it on video.

————

Not wanting to wait until Mammon would have one of his “episodes” on his own, you decided you’d have to try to trigger one yourself. Based on your observations, you needed to wait until he was *just* asleep, and then wake him suddenly - either a moderately loud noise, or a forceful movement.

So the following night, you made sure your DDD was fully charged...and you waited.

It didn’t take long for Mammon to pass out. You had made sure he spent the day running around the Devildom taking you shopping, and doing other “date” things, just to wear him out. And since this was Mammon, it took a LOT to wear him out. If it wasn’t for the fact you were on a mission, you’d probably have nodded off yourself long ago.

You pulled out your DDD, turned on your camera to record video…and then delivered a swift kick to Mammon’s butt.

As expected, Mammon sat up almost immediately.

“Hey Mammon.”

“Mmmm?”

“Are you asleep?”

“Nooo,” he whined. You snickered at his response. This was going perfectly.

“I need you to do something for me in the morning.”

“Sure, whattttayaaa want?”

“Can you make me breakfast?”

“Sure.”

“So what are you going to do in the morning?”

“Everryyythinnnn.”

“Are you going to make me breakfast?”

“That’s part of everrryyythinnn’.”

By now you were having a difficult time maintaining your composure. You only just managed to keep your DDD steady enough to get a decent video. You hadn’t tried talking to Mammon this much the other times, and were surprised at how long he was able to keep this up. Seeing as you had nothing to lose, you decided to keep going.

“Can you say it for me in a complete sentence? What are you going to do in the morning?”

“Breakfast and bugggsss.”

“What?”

“Breakfast and bugggsss.”

“Bugs?”

“Yesh.”

“So one more time, what are you going to do in the morning?”

“Killlll everythinnnn’.”

That was apparently your breaking point, and you had to cover your mouth to stop the loud squeals of laughter that weren’t threatening to escape. This had gone far more perfectly than you ever could have imagined. There was no way he was going to be able to deny this now. Imagining how red his face would get as you showed him the video had you giggling even harder.

Pausing your recording, and safely tucking away your DDD, you decided that you had had enough fun for the night and that it was time to give poor Mammon a break and let him rest.

“Ok Mammon, will you come cuddle with me now?”

“Fiiinnneee,” he said, slumping down onto the bed and rolling over so he could snuggle up to your side. You really had exhausted him that day, so he deserved a bit of rest. Gently combing your fingers through his hair, you thought about how exactly you were going to make use of this video as you drifted off to sleep.

Based on this conversation with my husband -

[ofpaperhearts]

▷  currently  playing  ——  THE FAÇADE  a playlist for Elliot King. n. a false appearance that makes someone or something seem more pleasant or better than they really are.

!! anxiety & depression tw throughout playlist !!

obnoxiously long tracklist & descriptions that may or may not make sense under the cut!

▷  currently  playing  ——  TWO  by  SLEEPING AT LAST.

it’s okay if you can’t catch your breath // you can take the oxygen straight out of my own chest // i know exactly how the rule goes: // put my mask on first // no, i don’t want to talk about myself // tell me where it hurts // i just want to build you up, build you up // ‘til you’re good as new // and maybe one day i’ll get around to fixing myself too

Okay, so there’s not a doubt in my mind that Elliot’s an enneagram type two, which is what this song is all about. The entire song really captures how he wants to take care of others and give his love to them, and then if there happens to be anything left, he’ll take care of himself, but it’s not a priority.

▷  currently  playing  ——  BEAUTIFUL LIGHT  by  UPPERMOST.

I don’t fully know how to describe it, but this song just makes me feel upbeat and hopeful and I feel like those are the types of vibes that Elliot tries to put out into the world. This is a song that works very well for him when simply looking at him on the surface level.

▷  currently  playing  ——  I JUST WANNA SHINE  by  THE FITZ AND THE TANTRUMS.

so don’t give me dark days, i already had those // i’m just trying to figure out how to be myself right now // i don’t wanna lay low, hiding in the shadows // so i wake up, i get out of bed // stay up, stay out of my head

This song is probably more how Elliot perceives himself. Like despite having his own stresses and hardships, he still strives to make the most of his life and keep up and optimistic view.

▷  currently  playing  ——  MESS IS MINE  by  VANCE JOY.

bring me to your house // tell me, “sorry for the mess”, hey i don’t mind // you’re talking in your sleep, out of time // well, you still make sense to me, your mess is mine

This song just goes back to how he wants to give an receive love by taking care of others.

▷  currently  playing  ——  PLEASER  by  WALLOWS.

indecisive feelings of enjoyment // hold the thought, i think i need a moment // i’m aware there’s somethin’ i should tell you // but my voice annoys me // bite my tongue off with a smile // i can’t feel it anymore // ‘cause recently the line is blurred // between depression and bliss

This whole song is basically about being a people pleaser (which Elliot is to an unhealthy degree) and struggling to figure out to please someone (which is something that would cause Elliot a great deal of distress to be perfectly honest).

▷  currently  playing  ——  OH KLAHOMA  by  JACK STAUBER.

tears falling down at the party // saddest little baby in the room // fears, tell me fears, don’t get me started // i get a little grey hair for every scare you share

Honestly, Elliot could be either person in this song. For the most part Elliot would see himself as the person in this song that’s trying to console the other (possibly at the expense of their own mental health), but he could just as easily be the other person if he actually asked for help/comfort whenever he’s going through something.

▷  currently  playing  ——  HARD TIMES  by  PARAMORE.

all that i want // is to wake up fine // tell me that i’m alright // that i ain’t gonna die

Upbeat songs with sad lyrics just have an Elliot vibe to them. I think songs like this reflect that happy/put together front he puts on for everyone, even when he isn’t doing so great.

▷  currently  playing  ——  FAKE HAPPY  by  PARAMORE.

hey, if i smile with my teeth // bet you believe me // if i smile with my teeth // i think i believe me // oh please, don’t ask me how i’ve been // don’t make me pretend

Same reason Hard Times is on here. The lyrics definitely hammer the part of putting up a front for others home more.

▷  currently  playing  ——  WAY LESS SAD  by  AJR.

i’m a-okay, i’m a-okay // you say it but you just don’t mean it

I think the mix of putting up a front and trying to remain optimistic even in life’s harder moments just fits Elliot.

▷  currently  playing  ——  WONDERFUL LIFE  by  SMITH & BURROWS.

you know it feels unfair // there’s magic everywhere // look at me standing // here on my own again // up straight in the sunshine // no need to run and hide // it’s a wonderful, wonderful life // no need to laugh and cry // it’s a wonderful, wonderful life

There’s something about the softness of this song that just gives me Elliot vibes. But I think beyond that, it’s the mix of optimistic and pained lyrics that make me think of Elliot whenever I hear this song.

▷  currently  playing  ——  BLUE KNUCKLE  by  NIGHT BEDS.

i’ve been working like a surgeon // on some courage // lift my burden // i’ve been hurting // have you heard it

I just feel like the bits of this song that I relate to him scream, all the self-sacrificing I constantly do doesn’t make me as happy as I thought it would, but I’m not entirely sure how to change that without some help.

▷  currently  playing  ——  FREAKIN’ OUT ON THE INTERSTATE  by  BRISTON MARONEY.

i’m sorry i haven’t been myself // and something’s got me down // what it is, i cannot tell

1. He’s so concerned with others that I don’t think he necessarily knows how to pinpoint why something would bother him. 2. High anxiety hours.

▷  currently  playing  ——  FALSE CONFIDENCE  by  NOAH KAHAN.

and i wonder why i tear myself down to be built back up again // oh, i hope somehow, i’ll wake up young again // all that’s left of myself, holes in my false confidence

Themes of being hypercritical of oneself and insecurity which is something Elliot struggles a lot with under his surface level happiness.

▷  currently  playing  ——  COLD LOVE  by  RAINBOW KITTEN SURPRISE.

and if i cry in your arms // just some other shit, just some other shit // just some other things that i’ve been dealing with // i’d die in your arms, bury me while playing this // bury me saying “you were all i ever needed” // and hold me like we’re dying from liquor that we drank // in hotel rooms, to feel warm in cold love

Originally, I only wanted to include this song for the first part of the lyrics I put here because it’s the same dismissive attitude Elliot has when it comes to taking care of himself. But the more I thought about it, I think Elliot is the type of person to find himself in doomed relationships because the give and take is never equal resulting in ‘dying/cold’ loves.

▷  currently  playing  ——  ALMOST HOME  by  MXMTOON.

i was just a kid // dreams were looking big and then i had to grow up // no one ever says // all the love you give might not be enough // broke my heart in two a couple times // before it hurt too much // i was such fool

I feel like Elliot was a relatively carefree child before becoming increasingly more and more concerned with how others saw him and feel like that’s kind of reflected in this song? Like growing is usually very different from how one imagines it when they’re a kid.

▷  currently  playing  ——  MELODY X  by  BONAPARTE.

you keep the light on // you keep the light on // you keep the night light on // hold your broken dream up high // oh, you know you try // oh, you know you try // it’s the worst case scenario lullaby // something’s gotta change (something’s gotta change)

Another song acknowledging how hecking hard life is and trying to remain hopeful in spite of it with a hint of being aware that something needs to change in Elliot’s life for him to really be happy.

▷  currently  playing  ——  NO ID  by  ANDREW APPLEPIE.

and suddenly you realize // that everything you’d ever told yourself were lies // and believe me i can sympathize // cause everything i ever thought i was made me cry

Overall, this song is about self-acceptance and growth, which is something Elliot is still working on. And it’s more so on here as Elliot being the person the singer is watching struggle with these things.

▷  currently  playing  ——  PRETENDER - ACOUSTIC  by  AJR.

i’m a good pretender // won’t you come see my show? // i got lots of problems // well, good thing nobody knows // oh, i’m insecure, i’m insecure // i think i like what i’m supposed to // like what i’m supposed to

Back on that putting up a front for everyone else because he thinks that’s for the better/expected of him bs!

▷  currently  playing  ——  BRAIN, BRAIN, GO AWAY  by  UNLIKE PLUTO.

through the night my mind is racing // my inner voice and i debating // on everything i should be changing // can’t decide so i keep maintaining // i gotta contain my overactive mind

This song is on here because big anxiety hours and how truly exhausting it is to deal with.

▷  currently  playing  ——  MIND IS A PRISON  by  ALEC BENJAMIN.

sometimes, i think too much, yeah, i get so caught up // i’m always stuck in my head // i wish i could escape, i tried to yesterday alone with my thoughts again // guess my mind is a prison and i’m never gonna get out

Same exact reason why Brain, Brain, Go Away is on his playlist.

▷  currently  playing  ——  NUMB  by  MARINA.

i can’t open up and cry //  ‘cause i’ve been silent all my life // i feel numb most of the time // lower i get, higher // i’ll climb, and i will wonder why // i got dark only to // shine, looking for the golden light // oh, it’s a reasonable sacrifice

One of the main reasons this song is included is because of a comment made on the lyric ‘oh, it’s a reasonable sacrifice’ and how in this song it seems to imply sacrificing one’s well-being to impress others is fine and if that’s not Elliot’s biggest mood than I don’t know what is. But in addition to that, a lot of the other lyrics touch on internal struggles he deals with and trying to overcome them.

▷  currently  playing  ——  NOBODY  by  MITSKI.

and i don’t want your pity // i just want somebody near me // guess i’m a coward // i just want to feel alright // and i know no one will save me

1. This is the type of song that sounds like “ooooo fun” but then you listen to the lyrics and it’s like “BOOM SADNESS” which is kind of Elliot’s song aesthetic if that makes sense? 2. Despite having people in his life that he’s close to, life can still feel very isolating when he’s not open about everything he has going on. 3. This song is an enneagram type two’s biggest fear so it just makes sense being here.

▷  currently  playing  ——  IT’S CALLED: FREEFALL  by  RAINBOW KITTEN SURPRISE.

called to the devil and the devil said, “hey! why you been calling so late? it’s like 2am and the bars all close at 10 in hell, that’s a rule i made” // anyway, you say you’re too busy saving everybody else to save yourself // and you don’t want no help, oh well

More on the idea that life can be very isolating when you struggle in silence and Elliot’s “gotta help everyone else over myself” mentality.

▷  currently  playing  ——  MINDLESS BLISS  by  UNLIKE PLUTO.

always staying up to the sunrise // i can barely close my eyes // all i’m looking for is a good night // just for one night, just for one night // but i am wide awake, surviving day to day // i’m half alive in my own way // and i’m struggling with all the carrying

More big themes of anxiety and struggling with it.

▷  currently  playing  ——  WAVES  by  DEAN LEWIS.

and it takes control of the person that i thought i was // the boy i used to know // but there is a light in the dark // and i feel it’s warmth // in my heart, in my hands // but why can’t i hold on?

Life’s always changing for better or worse and growing up you can think life is going to be one way just for it to be something completely different and I think Elliot can relate to that sentiment a lot.

▷  currently  playing  ——  KEEP  by  MOTHER MOTHER.

i write it down, but to read it doesn’t work // take it to town, but to be seen doesn’t work // smack it around, but that only make it worse // i make it worse // i meditate for a day, but it doesn’t help // get down and pray, i gotta say, what a living hell // i could escape but i know that all too well // it doesn’t help

Wanting to cope with things, but struggling to do so in a way that works which is a big Elliot mood.

▷  currently  playing  ——  DON’T WORRY, YOU WILL  by  LOVELYTHEBAND.

trying to stay positive // not an easy way to live // laugh right through the pain // she said i can’t find a thing i don’t like about you // and i’m like don’t worry, you will

More themes of being hypercritical of oneself, silently struggling, and putting up a charade to get others to like you or to please them.

▷  currently  playing  ——  GOODBYE  by  BO BURNHAM.

am i right back where i started fourteen years ago? // wanna guess the ending? if it ever does // i swear to god that all i’ve ever wanted was // a little bit of everything all of the time well, well, look who’s inside again // went out to look for a reason to hide again // well, well, buddy, you found it

Full disclosure, I only know this song from TikTok. But anyway! I just felt like the lyrics in the last bit of the song were super fitting: the fear of being back right back where he started before he got a little better at putting himself first, struggling to balance everything he wants/needs, dismissing his problems in favor or something lighthearted like a joke, looking for reasons to keep things to himself, etc.