#if i try hard enough i can get all my mutuals obsessed with this one niche australian band

[i-have-not-slept]

Malectober 2023

aka happy birthday Alec!!!

Prompt: "Dessert"

Song: "Candy Apple" by Teenage Joans

@malectober

[mochamadeleines]

Sweethearts and Sweet Dreams <3

“Nothin’?”

“Mhm.”

“Whats behind your back then?”

You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.” (6.4k words)

tags!! - 18+ modern au! Husband! Joel Miller, Wife! Reader, you guys are happy and in love!, mutual obsession if u squint, lots of exposition im so freaking sorry, pervert Joel if u squint, praise kink joel if you squint, dumbification if you squint, written for those with daddy issues lowkeeyyyyy, written with game joel in mind but could be hbo joel no problem!, lowk i combined the two in my mind, mentions of shy old man joel, housewife! reader (by choice), unspecified age gap but reader is like. thirty? and joels Like...55??, talk about joel taking medication for his anxiety, p in v sex, dirty talk, public sex, outdoor sex, joel has a kink for dresses because i said so? service top joel if you squint, pet names, a pinch of jealousy and possessiveness for fun, playful banter, mentions of maria and tommy and their baby with a made up name Lol, mentions of ellie and sarah (rip), mentions of readers past abusive relationships, talk about joel struggling with substance abuse/addiction and being hospitalized.....Im sure u can theorize why </3, lots of lore ill get into in another fic MAYBE *smirks*, flip flop in perspective, sometimes showing what joel is thinking or what reader is thinking blah blah

authors notes!! - hi there!!! im mocha and this is my first joel fic ever + my first fic posted to tumblr!! im really nervous cuz i havent written anything in months and ive never written joel before so please let me know if you like it!! id love to write more of this au for u guys if theres a demand for it...Thank u for reading!! also barely proof read im ngl. ive been staring at this fic all day im sick of itttt. p.s i dont usually write smut i also kinda do idfk Is this bad or am i tweaking

You step out of the house, morning sun soaking into the roots of your hair and the driveway beneath your feet. Theres a package youve been waiting for. 

You cant contain your grin as you wiggle it out of the hot prison that is your mailbox.

“What the hell are you doin’ out there barefoot?” Joel chastises you from the front door, leaning his elbow on the frame. Joel, your lovely husband of two years. Been together for five. And because of how hard he works, you have the privilege of being a stay at home wife. Some people think that sort of life is stifling, but youve never felt so free. No more jobs you hate, no more financial struggles. Just you, Joel, and your cat, Cement. He likes to pretend it isnt a totally hilarious name for a pet.

You were his first relationship in almost a decade, so it was a lot of work helping him unpack his anxieties about dating, and a lot of work for you to feel safe and unafraid. Honestly? Youve been mistreated by enough men to land you in the psychward.

But Joel never yells at you, he never breaks things when hes angry or threatens to hurt you. He might raise his voice every now and again, but its never because of something you did. Sometimes the stress of life is just too much. 

He works hard, he loves his daughter- daughters- and he would do anything to keep you happy. Whatever you say goes, he says. Even now, you hardly argue. Of course you have disagreements, or off days thatd lead to one of you being especially moody, but the both of you do your best to communicate.

Behind that rough exterior, is someone who just wants to be needed. 

You first met Joel at a youth center you volunteered at, he taught guitar, you taught arts and crafts. Joel says it was your smile and sense of humor that charmed him. It was his singing and southern accent for you.

Your favorite thing about Joel is how soft he gets around you. He says its because you make it easy to be soft. 

Joel was a shy lover at first. He would get nervous just kissing you, or holding your hand. While most people become intimate very early on in their relationship, you and Joel didnt do anything sexual for the first five months of you dated. Sure, you almost did, plenty of times, but he would get so overwhelmed and cut things short. You broke two of your vibrators during this era of your relationship. Embarassing.

You remember your first time very vividly. Joel had worked back to back doubles trying to meet a deadline, and on the final day, after having barely spoken to you for almost a week, you had shown up to his house, unannounced. You were wringing water out of your jacket when he swung the door open. 

“How-” Joel blinks a few times, stepping forward to examine the rainfall. “How long you been out here?”

“Not that long,” You lie and pick up the container you brought off the porch chair. Part of you had a hard time mustering up the courage to even knock on the door. Droplets of water cascade down your chin. “Hi, sorry. I know youre tired.”

He shakes his head, voice soft and warm. “S’fine. Now c’mon, youre gonna get sick.”

Youre seated at the little dining table next to the kitchen now, trying to let the sound of the rainfall ease your nerves.

Joel was quick to grab you a towel, and does the honors of drying your face and hair with it. “Why didnt you jus’ call me? Woulda gotten out of the shower faster if i knew you were gettin’ soaked out there like this.”

“I dunno, sorry.”

“An’ whatd i tell you about apologizin’ all the time?”

“Sor- Uh. Right. Okay.” You tighten your jaw. No more.

Joel moves behind you, now squeezing water out the ends of your hair. “Whas’ that?”

“Oh!-” You peel back the lid, showing it to him. “Old fashion cake donuts are your favorite right? I remember you saying you liked eating them with your coffee in the mornings so…I made these. Youve been working a lot lately and I wanted to do something nice for you.”

Joel gingerly grasps the container from your hands, looking into it. Theyre a warm golden brown, outside evenly fried, and the sweet scent of them hits his nose right away.

“I was just gonna leave them on the doorstep and call you to tell you they were there, but I wanted to see you.”

His adam's apple bobs as he swallows the dryness in his throat. Youre too good for him. 

“Thank you very much.” He presses a kiss to your damp hair. “Now, lets get you into some dry clothes.”

Joel gives you a t-shirt and a pair of his boxers to keep you modest while your clothes wash and dry. 

You wait patiently on his bed for the hot chocolate he promised you before you showered. Theres nothing to watch on the tv, so you just turn it off and reach for the lamp on his nightstand instead. 

He comes in quietly, and sets the mug down beside the lamp. You finally come into focus, clear as day even under the low lighting.

“You uh.. You look nice.”

You blink. “I look nice?”

“In my shirt.”

That gets a smile out of you. 

Joel tips his head towards the mug. “S’hot so, give it a few minutes. Dont want you burnin’ your mouth.”

You nod. “Okay.”

Hes sat beside you now and the two of you sit in silence for a while. Its not awkward, just the kind of silence where both of you want to say something but just.. Cant.

Joel unravels first. “Missed you, y’know. Just been tired.”

“I know.” Your voice wobbles, and Joels jaw tightens like hearing you sound so sad stings him. “I missed you, too.” 

He slides his hand over yours, giving it a squeeze. Its okay. 

“Hey Joel...Can I stay the night?” 

“Sure. Id really like that.”

While you drink your hot chocolate, you and Joel catch up. You both talk about work, and about your new found interest in baking. Joel teases you about your lack of cooking skills, you do the same. Youre both useless. 

When its time to climb into bed, neither of you can actually fall asleep. Joel rolls onto his side, away from you and the window. You follow, curling up like a little cat against his back. The sensation is nice for the both of you.

You speak up after a little while.

“Joel?”

“Mm.”

“Thank you for letting me stay.”

He scoffs, voice thick with exhaustion. “Like I'd force you to leave after you brought me such a nice present.”

You let out a little giggle, “So if i didnt, youd kick me out?”

“Id think ‘bout it.”

You gasp, gently shoving at his back. “Thats mean…!”

“S’really not.”

“Oh yeah? And what if I poisoned them?.”

“Then itd jus' be a regular day of your cookin’ then.” Joel reminds you, lighthearted. Too many times where you left the shells in your eggs or burnt toast or left the bacon on the pan for too long.

“You cant get mad at me for my dark past when you made a perfectly good sirloin taste like horse leather.”

“Ugh. Dont remind me. That was like putting a one-hundred dollar bill into a paper shredder. How do either of us stay alive again?”

“Uh. Digiorno?”

“Digiorno.”

After a few moments, Joels rolling over again, and hes guiding your head to settle against his chest. Your arms wrap around him, and his arms around you. 

“Joel,” You whisper. He hums. “Im cold.”

“S’cause youre not wearin’ any pants.”

“And whos fault is that?”

“Still yours.”

“I was left out in the rain like a sad, sopping wet cat. One that was left in a box all alone with no family…” You pretend to sniffle. “Dont you feel bad for me?”

Joel sighs, not saying anything more except making sure the part of the comforter behind your back is tucked into your side so the cold air doesnt get in. When hes done, you do a little shimmy up his body, and throw your leg over his hip. Oh no.

Hes alert now. Very alert. Be normal. Joel hesitates, licking the dryness off his lips. “Uh. Feel better?”

“Mhm.” You push your face into his throat, cat-like, before settling down again. Hes like a radiator.

Actually scratch that, he cant be normal. 

“Darlin’.” He rasps, patting your back to get your attention.

“Mm?”

“Your leg. Move it.”

A few beats pass. “Why?”

“Because…” Wow,  he didnt think hed get this far. You shift forward and Joel lets out a quiet exhale through his nose, one that couldve been masked by the rain if you werent so close.

“Are you-”

“No! No. Its- Its not what you think-” He cant see your face in the darkness but he knows you feel the semi-hard struggling through the confines of his pants. Lame.

“Joel,” You say, soft. Your hands slide up his arm to cradle his jaw. Lightning flashes into the room, giving you a glimpse of Joels tight expression. He whispers your name back, just as soft.

“This is normal.” 

Its normal, it is! Except for the fact that you guys havent had sex yet. The stress of being intimate is too much, kills his boner in a blink. The longer he waits the worse the anxiety gets.

“I-I know.”

You place a hand on his chest, feeling it pound away like crazy through all the soft muscle.  

“Youve been taking your medication, right?”

Has he?

The silence of him thinking is proof enough. “Joel-”

He sighs, rubbing his eyes through the darkness .“I know, I know. Shoot, Im sorry. I just forget sometimes.”

“Its okay.” The pad of your thumb strokes the tops of his cheek, and you press a tender kiss to his mouth to soothe him.  “...Want me to remind you?”

The softness of your lips has him a bit dazed. “Huh?”

“I said, do you want me to remind you? I can- You know, call you before you leave work. Make sure you take them.”

“You know I wake up at five-o-clock in the mornin’ , right?”

“I know.” 

In a whisper, “Okay.”

Joels rough palms trail down your back and stop at the curve of your butt, finger tips delicately tracing the skin above your shorts. You shiver.

Barely above a whisper. “We dont have to go all the way.”

He says your name again, laced with worry. He doesnt want you to feel pressured. 

You pull your leg off his hip and push yourself up, settling your hands on either side of Joels head.

“Can I tell you something?”

“Yes-”

“-And you cant get all in your head about it. You stay here, with me. You stay present.”

“Okay, okay.” He nods, a bit defeated. “I will stay present.”

“When you...When you say you dont wanna have sex, what is it that youre thinking exactly? I know you said you just get really nervous but I feel like youre not being totally honest.”

Joel stays quiet, idly rubbing your sides. Maybe you are a cat. Just getting to feel any part of you is soothing. “I jus’ want you to feel good. ‘Fraid ill do somethin’ you dont like.”

“You cant assume how I feel, Joel. Being intimate.. It takes time to learn what the other person likes.”

He sighs. “I know.” Youre always right.

Adding on, “Like I said, we dont have to go all the way,” You lean further back, situating yourself on his hips. He lets out a shaky breath when he feels the pressure of your ass through his sweats.

“But, I want to start somewhere. I want to feel you.” 

“Fuck- Um-” Hes shaking now, letting you grind your hips down onto him. Joel cant seem to control the way his hips instinctively push up to meet yours. Youre both becoming of a mess of little gasps and hot breaths and tiny whimpers already.

You hunch forward, guiding his hand under your your shirt- His shirt- letting him feel up the supple skin of your stomach, then the area where your ribs are, then your-

“And I want you to feel me,”

Surprisingly, you did actually go all the way that night.

Your sex life was a bit of a rocky start, but after Joel got over most of his anxiety, you learned quickly just how goddamn insatiable he was. Five years in and he still regularly makes you sore. 

There are a couple things you learned about him and his sexual interests. He loves to take you in his truck, in your kitchen, in your bathroom, on your couch. Other, riskier places. Anywhere that isnt your bed apparently, not that he isnt fucking you there either.

Joel is handsy, so handsy infact it embarasses you to no end, especially when youre infront of others. Thats usually how it starts, too. First he kisses you, then gropes your hips and your ass, and the next thing you know, youre cumming on his fingers. Then hed bend you over, or get you on your back, or make you ride him. Is it really riding if hes just slamming up into you until your brain turns into mush?

He likes that too. Making you not think.

Youd be lying if you said its only ever him. Sleepy morning handjobs before work, whining to him over the phone and touching yourself to his voice, arching your back into him while you're washing dishes, sucking him off after hours in his office.

And while most men prefer lingerie or little costumes, Joel likes dresses. Dresses that are discreet so he can take you in the backyard when he comes home early and sees you gardening. Or when youre both at a friends house and hes had a little too much to drink and finds himself alone with you. Dresses that make it easy to play his favorite game with you. I touch you, and you make sure we dont get caught by being too loud. Joel really is the worst sometimes.

Now, you only ever wear pants when its cold, or to bed or sometimes when youre lounging, like today. Youre in some shorts and a tank top. Otherwise, its dresses all year round, usually retro styles or ones meant for spring. Joels not picky though, he loves any dress on you.

Even if you wear an extremely modest, white lacey sleep dress, looking like some kind of vintage ghost, the man would still keep you up all night. And he has. He said you looked like a princess. You guess you kind of did.

The entire thing is like an unspoken arrangement between you both. He doesnt tell you to wear them, you just do.

And he works hard to spoil you, so why not buy as many cute dresses as possible? 

You got a cute dress today too, on the same day Joel has off. You think its going to be a new favorite of his.

The big polymailer stays hidden behind your back. Be casual. “Uh- Nothing!”

“Nothin’?”

“Mhm.”

“Whats behind your back then?”

You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.”

“Lemme see then. Show me your hands-”

“Hey, Mrs. Miller!”

Both you and Joel turn your heads to the voice, and only one of you has the energy to fake a a smile. Your neighbor is stopping in his driveway, having come back from a jog it looks.

“Hi, Lee.” 

Joel really, really, really doesnt like Lee. You dont like him either, but youre not one to cause problems. Lee on the other hand, is. Hes a bit younger than you, and a lot younger than Joel. Hes one of those tech dudes with a massive ego, thinks that youll be swayed by his money and his “charm” and youth as if youre some sad housewife in need of saving. Gross. 

And another thing, Lee doesnt even actually live here! Hes here ever so often to visit his dad between, you dont know, tech expos? You forget. Joel believes he started showing up more often to see you. 

Youre walking towards the porch again. Joels looking especially unhappy to see him today, knuckles pulled taut into a fist. His lips stay pressed into a thin line, careful not to let anything slip out. He usually lets you do most of the talking, as much as it pains him. 

Joels really not a fan of the way Lees eyes take a trip up your bare legs. Little shit.

“Out with no shoes again, Mrs. Miller?”

“You know me, Im uh- Im weird.”

“The weird ones do it best.” He smiles, all teeth. It gives you the creeps. His attention is on Joel now. Its like watching a puppy try to one up a wolf. “Right, Joel?”

“Uh huh.” Whatever that means.

“Actually, I've been meaning to ask you something, Mrs. Miller.” Lee crosses into your driveway and you glance briefly at Joel, as if to make sure he isnt going to start growling at the other to stay away. Youre clutching the package to your chest now. 

“Have you ever been to a support group for uh- you know, the spouses of addicts?  I have a friend from work and shes really struggling.” 

Lees tone is sugary sweet, but the fake kind you put in diet soda except that stuff is way better. Joel sighs from the door. You stand there, dumbfounded on the porch steps because what the fuck is he going on about. 

You clear your throat, keeping your voice firm. “No. Ive never needed to.”  

Joels voice cuts in like a knife. “Been clean for almost twenty years now.”

“Yeah but, you know,” He shrugs, squinting a bit under the morning sun. “Relapses happen.”

Joel and Lee are at a stand still, and the moment Joel lets the arm leaning on the frame drop to his side, you know youre in for a lot of trouble. You move quickly towards the door. “We have to get ready for a- uh- a thing? but Im sorry about your friend.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Miller. Im doing my best to support her.” And before he turns away, he just has to be slimy to you. “If you need someone to talk to, Im here for you.”

“No, that really wont be necess-”

Joels slinging a strong arm around you to yank you back inside before shutting the door. 

“Motherfucker,” He hisses to himself, stomping through the walkway and into the kitchen.

“How-” You rub your eyes, letting them adjust to the light inside of the house. You put the package down onto the bar counter that opens up the kitchen and follow Joel to the fridge. “How does he know?? I thought-”

“Been living in this house for decades now,” His expression is tight, brows knitted together while he chugs a bottle of water. “People talk. ‘Specially if I'm being rolled into an ambulance on more than one occasion.” Joel frowns. “Fuck- I shoulda punched him in the fuckin’ face- Do you see how hard he tries so hard to flirt with you infront’a me?”

“I know, love. I was there.” You take the bottle from his hand and set it to the side, then wrap your arms around him. “Try not to let it get to you okay?”

Joel sighs into your hair, giving your body a squeeze. “I know, I know, but jus’ hearin’ him tryin’ta use my baggage to make a pass at you…S’fuckin’ evil.”

“I agree, but I dont want his blood on the driveway.”

“So get it on his driveway instead, got it.”

You giggle and tip your head up to kiss him. The tension eases from Joels shoulders, and he cups your cheeks, letting his worries melt away into your mouth. When the pads of his fingers start to slide under your tank top, youre leaning back. Youll be here for a while if this goes any further.

Joel mindlessly chases your lips, looking a bit pouty now that its over.

“Im gonna start getting ready for the barbecue, okay?”

“This early?”

“I like being punctual.” 

“My brother wont give a damn if were late.” He noses your jaw, pressing a kiss here and there. Your knees are beginning to feel weak. The bastard is trying to distract you.

“But I do. The farmers market opened today, and I promised Maria I'd get her fresh strawberries before we got there, remember?”

“Alright, alright.” He grumbles into your shoulder.

Joel lets you go, watching you round the bar counter to get your package and disappear upstairs.

-

Ever since you came down to a freshly showered Joel, and got into the car with the gift bags you prepared for Maria and Tommy, Hes been staring at you. One wrong move and the drools gonna start pouring out of his mouth.

Your hair is in its relatively natural state, freshly washed and shiny from the oil you put in it. You put on some light makeup, and went a bit heavy handed on the blush to look sunkissed, and topped it off with a flavored lip gloss Joel especially enjoys. 

Now, the dress. Its a pink floral mid-length dress, with a low cut sweetheart neckline and a corset style backing to cinch your waist and push out your chest. The material is thick and pretty, and there are two other layers under the skirt to keep its shape. You have on a pair of little pink pumps with little bows to match. 

The drive to the farmers market is fairly peaceful, the windows are half down and theres music playing at low volume on the radio. You and Joel have different tastes in music, but one genre you can always agree on is alternative rock. 

The weathers beautiful, sun high in the sky, and its not too hot or humid. The day really is perfect. Youre gonna soak up some sun when youre at the barbecue. Hopefully, they made lemonade again too.

Joel has been mostly quiet throughout your shopping. While it would worry some, youve been with him long enough to know that he just has a lot on his mind. What hes thinking about? Maybe youll learn when you make it back home at the end of the day.

You gasp, strolling through the grass to a stand with a mountain of apples. Granny smith, Macintosh, Pink Ladys, Honeycrisp, the works. He grunts, trying to keep the things that are already in your basket steady. You came for strawberries and are going to leave with much more than that.

Joel nudges you softly. “Remember, this is quality stuff, meaning itll go bad faster. Dont get too much.”

“Okay, got it.” You beam, and then begin inspecting the Pink Lady apples first, trying to find the ones with the best color.  He keeps the basket within reach so you can drop your picks in.

"These were Sarahs favorites."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, it was funny 'cause we started arguin' over these or Red Delicious. I think Red Delicious is better."

"Thats so cute! Hmm. Should we get one for her? A Pink Lady?"

"Uh," He thinks on it for a moment, unsure, but the smile on your face helps him make a decision. "Sure, why not."

You drop two perfect Pink Ladys into the basket, moving onto the next pile.

“Hey, Joel.” You grin, holding out a wrinkled granny smith apple. “This one looks like you”

“Ha ha.” He deadpans, and grabs it from you to put back. In turn, hes reaching for the runt of the pile. A pathetically small one sitting near the bottom. “Now this one looks like you.”

“Does not!”

“Does too.” 

The next stand has golden kiwis, and youre practically dragging Joel forward to try them. You ask for one, and the man at the stand slices it into halves, giving you a plastic spoon to go with. 

You let Joel smell it first. “S’good.”

“Lets see if it tastes good.”

You sink your spoon into it, humming when you see how soft and easy it is to scoop out. In your mouth it goes!

Its tastes sweet, a bit mango-y and fucking delicious. You bounce in place, spoon feeding Joel next. “Oh yeah,” He smiles, smacking his lips a bit to really let the taste settle on his tongue. “Were takin’ some of these.”

You take one, then two, then three and four then five and as you reach for the sixth one, Joels stopping you with a gentle hand. 

“Darlin’.” 

“Right.” 

For the next few stands its just you and Joel trying various kinds of fruit. Starfruit, blueberries, some mangos, and then youre going back to the truck.

“I think my favorites were the mangos and golden kiwis. I hope Maria and Tommy have enough space in their fridge for all of this.”

“They moved into a bigger house, I reckon their fridge s’probably bigger, too.”

“What time is it?” 

You let go of Joels arm so he can switch the basket from one hand to the other. 

“‘Bout…” Hes squinting at his watch. “12:34 in the afternoon.”

“Oh! Guess we got the shopping done sooner than I expected. Hmm. Should we stop somewhere in the mean time?-" You snap your finger when you remember something. "They opened up this cafe that has cats in it! We can drink coffee and play with them for bit! The next fourty-five minutes will go by super fast."

“Youre gonna make Cement jealous.”

You bat your hand dismissively. “Hes not gonna caaare.” 

“Oh yes he will. And remind me again why we named our cat Cement?

“Uh, we were both drunk and had gotten him the day before without a name picked out?”

“A whole year later and we still kept it. Worst pet owners ever.” Joel chuckles, opening the passenger door for you like he always does. 

“Thank you.”

“Mhm.”

The giant basket of fruit goes into the back seat next to the gift bags before Joel slots himself into the drivers seat. 

You fumble with the radio a bit, trying to see what else is on but ultimately landing back on your preferred station. Theyve been playing a lot of Linkin Park recently. Hell yeah. Joel buckles himself in at last, and pulls out of the parking lot. 

“Marias gonna teach me how to make baked chicken,” You hum, gazing outside the window.

“You sure youre not jus’ unteachable?”

“Ha ha,” You lightly shove his shoulder, making him smile. “I thought you loved the meat sauce pasta I learned how to make.”

He settles into his seat more comfortably at the stop light, elbow rested on the window. “Got me with that one. Think I like ground turkey over beef, though.”

“Yeah? Me too. The beef tastes better but the turkey is lighter. Stops me from feeling all sick.”

“Agreed.”

Youre looking out the windshield now. Where did all the buildings go? Youre out of the city. 

“Uh, Joel?”

“Mm?”

“Where are we going?”

“Somewhere to kill time.”

“Yeah but where?”

“Youll see.” 

Your brows pinch together. “I see a whole lot of nothing except for trees."

“Almost there.”

Joel makes a hasty left turn onto some campgrounds. Your stomach starts to twist into excited knots. Is he gonna show you a baby deer or something? Bunnies? He used to be a park ranger for this area, and would tell you stories about all sorts of baby animals hed run into.

The car comes to a stop, and he turns the engine off. Silence.

“So…Were out in the woods to kill time?”

“Mhm.” Joel unbuckles his seat belt and twists into the back to grab the spare jacket he usually keeps there, then gets out of the truck and comes around the back to open the door for you. 

He holds your hand to help you get down from the passenger side, and as soon as both of your shoes hit the ground Joel is on you. 

You dont know where your hands should go, youve kissed Joel a thousand times and yet you still get so flustered when he catches you by surprise. You keep your hands on his shoulders for now, letting him press wet kisses to your neck and shoulder.

“This is new right? The dress?” He gives your ass an appreciative squeeze through the fabric. “Thought you looked so pretty when you came down stairs in it.” 

Your heads spinning. Something about your dress? 

“Woulda been okay if you let me have you earlier.” He pulls away, examining your flushed face cradled by his hand. Every part of you just fits so well in his palms. “Then I thought, why not have you now? We got time to spare.”

“Joel- We- Someone could see us-” You sputter, and Joels already shaking his head with a knowing smirk. He pulls you around to the bed of the truck, popping it open, only pausing to spread open the jacket he grabbed, just having just thrown it in there when he came around to get you.

“No ones gonna come lookin’ for us.” He turns you around, pushing you down onto your front. “As long as youre quiet.” 

Fuck. You really hate this game. At least, you like to tell yourself that.

Blood rushes to your ears while Joels rough palms lift up the skirt of your dress, exposing your ass and thighs to the cool air. He whistles from behind you. 

“Red lace panties?” His fingers dont shy away from tracing along the fabric covering your cunt. “This new too?”

You crane your neck over your shoulder to look at his face. “Uh.. Surprise?”

Joels smiling now, fingers dipping under the lace. “Thas' awfully sweet of you.”

His touch slips and slides around your growing wetness, then trails down to your clit. Your voice wobbles a bit and fuck- fuck hes going too fast. “Joel- Ah-” You whimper and try to push yourself up to look at him but his hand is steady on your spine, keeping you down. 

Smug, “Go on, sweetheart. Keep sayin’ my name. Jus’ like that.”

A whine escapes you when he pulls away, “Nooo.” You push your ass back, as if to entice him. You succeed, because hes skipped his usual routine of fucking you with his hands and is now unbuckling his belt.

Joel rolls you onto your back, and peels your underwear all the way off, bunching it up and shoving it into his back pocket. Your face burns just watching him.

“Think i'll hold onto these for a lil’ while.”

His hands push the back of your knees towards your chest, exposing your heat. Youll never get used to the way he just seems so interested just watching your cunt squeeze around nothing. 

“Thats-” You swallow, pushing yourself up onto your elbows. "Joel.”

“Relax." He coos, "Seen it a thousand times already, and ill be seein' it a thousand more. Get used to it, honey.”

Your attention flickers down to where his dick is about to meet your entrance. Joels nudging you down onto your back again and pulling the top of your dress down to expose your chest. Its when youre distracted that he actually moves to push himself in.

Both of you groan together, and Joel could never get bored of fucking you, not when your cunt just pulses around him everytime hes inside you.

Joel wastes no time fucking you once he eases all the way inside. Youre trying your best to keep quiet. Shit is no easy task. Its like Joel is trying to get you guys arrested.

He props himself up with a hand near your head, and lets the other keep one of your legs pinned open. The moans start to claw out of your throat. “Joel- Joel-” 

“Shh. Thas’ enough.” He growls through his teeth, fucking you harder. “Youre gonna- Gh- Get us caught-”

Something rustles between the trees, making you both freeze. You clasp your hands over your mouth, watching Joel straighten up to look around.

After a few seconds of squinting, Joel can see a few foxes moving about through the trees. Thank fuck. His shoulders visibly relax.

Hushed, “E-Everything okay?”

“Yeah, jus’ some animals.” 

And like that, hes back to it. His dick is going to make your eyes permanently stay rolled into your head. 

Joel is always just so handsome when hes pounding into you. His forehead gets shiny with sweat, and his jaw is tight from clenching his teeth, keeping himself quiet so he can focus on your moans. His face is noticeably redder against his usual farmers tan too. Really, hes just so attractive.

A flurry of yes and harder and fuck spills out of your mouth and into your palms. Not too loud, you try to remind yourself.

“Joel- S’too much-”

“Nah, thas’ not it.” He huffs, humorous. “You can take it. Y'always do. In fact, you love gettin’ your cunt bullied by me, aint that right?” As if to get his point across, he thrust in all the way to the hilt, making you keen. You forgot how to breathe, lungs drawing tight in your chest.

"Fuck," You manage to squeeze out.

Your palms push weakly at his shoulders, trying to ground yourself somehow. His head drops to the junction of your neck and shoulder, inhaling deeply.

“You good?” He checks in, breath hot on your skin. As if your crying isnt enough.

“So g-good, Joel- Fuck- Youre so good.” 

With a little nod, Joels pushing himself up, switching to slow and deep strokes, really digging himself into you, and trying to find that spot he likes to call home.

He massages your chest, then squeezes your sides and your hips and finally, his thumb finds your clit. Immediately, you jolt. 

“Oh fuck-” 

“Quiet.” And he says it to keep the charade going, even though his favorite thing is hearing your sobs.

His thumb rubbing incessantly against your that sweet little nub of yours. You choke, and Joels chuckling, watching the way you squirm, body not knowing whether it should lean into his touch because its too good or away because its too much.

It starts with this firey feeling under the pad of his thumb, then deep inside your stuffed cunt. Youre going to cum. 

Your hands fly to your mouth again, and you get all wide eyed from the sensation. Its cute. Your muscles pull taut, legs locking around Joels hips. Youre wailing into your palm when it happens.

“Good girl,” His voice soothes you through it. “Very good.”

He pets away the fly aways sticking to your sweaty face when its over. Your eyes drop shut while you catch your breath. 

Joels moving again now. He rolls his hips a few times, and thumb is building the foundation of another orgasm in you. Youre shaking badly.

Your words slur too, “Cant- Too soon- Joel- Joel-”

“Another one.” Joel says firmly, but breathless. 

Youre gasping, not sure where to focus your eyes. The trees around you look like theyre spinning. Your attention is back on Joel, whos looking rather satisfied watching you squirm and cry. If thats how wants to play, then fine.

Your hands slide up Joels biceps, and rests on the nap of his neck to bring him down. “Juh-Joel,” You pant, cradling his face with both hands. “Youre so good- The best-”

Oh, Joel likes that one, you can tell by the way he looks away briefly. Shyness. Excitement runs up your spine. Joel loves being told hes doing well. 

“You are- Nghh-” You swallow the drool in your mouth, trying to get the words out clearly. “The best husband I could ever ask for.”

Joel wheezes, head dropping into the curve of your shoulder. “Please.”

“S’true,” You nod rapidly, fingers curling into his hair. “Youre so good to me and-and youre mine and- Joel-  Im yours.”

“Jesus-” He groans, soaking up the feeling of you pressing kisses to his face and up his jaw. 

“Hhah-  No one else can have me, okay? No one- Not even-”

The name doesnt even come out of your mouth before Joels coming to a stop to slip his arms all the way around your middle. With the new leverage he has on your body, hes drilling his way into you. You fucking squeal, rules now long forgotten. Youre a useless ragdoll in his arms and he wouldnt have it any other way.

Your lips are shiny with spit and left over lip gloss, and he can still taste the mintiness in his tongue. Every now and again your eyes drop shut, but his dick just punches into your guts a little harder. Look at me. 

Your brain is mush, just the way he likes it, and youre perfectly pliant in his arms, babbling over how good you feel. Hes kisses along the valley of your breasts now, stopping to suck the flesh of your nipples.

Youre just so pretty. Even when you have bedhead, or youre snotty from a cold, or youre all dirty from working in the garden  youre still so pretty. Including now, all sweaty with you lipgloss all smudged and your mascara starting to run. Youre perfect. 

Joel grunts loud, jaw clenched tight as he gets lost in the feeling of your insides. His perfect little wife.

When he cums, hes doubling over with a loud grunt, getting a few last thrusts in before his spent floods your cunt.

Youre blinking away your tears, now watching the clouds inch along the sky. It really is a beautiful day. You pet Joels sweaty hair, and kiss the side of his temple. Your core throbs faintly. Jesus, he did a number on you.

“Love,” You say softly, patting his back.

“Mm?”

“Get up.” Another pat. “Youre squishing me.” 

Joel backs off to buckle himself up, but you stay seated to catch your breath and adjust your dress. At least it didnt get ripped during all the… Commotion. Not like last time.

“I need my underwear back.”

“Nope,”

“Joel.”

He kisses the center of your forehead and helps you down from the bed and into the passenger seat instead.  “Told you i'm keepin’ ‘em.”

You sputter, “I cant go to barbecue commando!”

“Sure you can.” He pops open the glove compartment and gets out some tissues, hand snaking under your dress again to clean you. You sigh softly at the sensation.

“Youre the worst.”

“I am indeed the worst.” Joel pulls the seatbelt over your chest and clicks it in. “You can tell me all about it on the way to Tommys.” 

[randomshyperson]

Five Times Carol Danvers Kisses You

Summary: The five times Carol Danvers kisses you until you two finally get together. 

Warnings: Mentions but nothing explicit, a lot of fluff, mutual pining (and typical angst of trope), best friends to lovers, pre-canon-compliant (takes place before Carol is taken), kissing, happy(ish) ending. | Words: 4.836k

A/N-> As mentioned on this blog before, I absolutely love the dynamics of "Five Times Something" and after watching The Marvels I became obsessed with Carol Danvers, and here I am with something about my beloved blondie. It's short and sweet, and I didn't want to write anything too angsty but you can get hints of what's to come from the canon (Dr.Lawson being a Kree in disguise and what will happen to Carol). But the fic doesn't address this directly and ends up with a happy scene. Let's all live in denial.

General Masterlist | AO3 | Wattpad

-&-

One.

“This is not a place to raise a child” was the justification your father used when he left. Funny enough, he didn't take the child, you, away from all the high-tech military weapons that he described as inadequate for a child to grow up around. 

His lost, it what your mother said, an easy smile on her lips while she offered you a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. She still had some grease on her jacket and a lot of dust on her hair but she looked beautiful. That was just how things were for Wendy Lawson.

And because she was the best mom anyone could ask for, or at least that was what you would perceive it with your limited references of healthy families. She was the best because she would let you sit around while she worked for the Shield, casually teaching you advanced engineering like it was the same homework you had from secondary school.

That was the only life you knew: Afternoons of trying to stay out of the way of Shield Agents and their big weapons until you were old enough to have a gun yourself.

But before that time came, some of them worried you weren't having a decent childhood. Away from guns at least.

You don't know which of the Agents suggested to Doctor Lawson the kart track, but you wish you could thank them. Your mother, as the busy cientist she always has been, was not available to be around all of the evenings you wished to spend there but she trusted your independence to use the bus after school. Besides, you had the impression that there were always Shield Agents keeping an eye on you no matter where you went.

Só for three whole years, that old place was your favorite. You would run out from the classroom with the first ring of the bell to get to the kart track as fast as you could, and for all those three years, you were also the best runner there.

Of course, it cost you some bloody noose and bruised hands. Especially with sore losers little boys who were very unpleased to be second placed by some random girl. There were also the parents, who would whisper not very lowly on how absurd it was to let an unsupervised little girl in such a violent activity.

As luck would have it, someday you were no longer the only little girl around.

The Danvers were local, and you always thought there were only three of them. The grumpy father and the loud and popular sons. But one day, the one with the warmest smile, the youngest son brought someone with him.

His little sister's name was Carol. She had her blonde hair tied down and she looked ready to punch anyone who gave her a hard time. All the Danvers kind looked the same to be fair. Blonde, strong and angry.

Unlike her brother and their free pass to do as they please, Carol was constantly reprimanded by her father. Even there, in front of the whole crowd and runners, he would scream and pinch her ear, adding to the fury that shone behind Carol's little blue eyes.

The other children would whisper just like their parents but growing up with spies and secret agents gave you this second nature to sneak in and out of places without being noticed. You weren't supposed to hear some of the adults whispering how Mr.Danvers drank more than he should or how his older son was leaving next summer for the army with a purple eye he didn't get in the training. You weren't supposed to but you did.

So the next time Carol crashed a car with one of the other runners, you messed up your perfect record to help her.

Her dad screamed again, as usual. But he left, muttering she could find her way home since she was so clever and Carol had those thick tears in her eyes that made them bluer, so you were helping her before you could give a second thought to it.

She didn't mind that you took her hand and brought her to the administration lobby. She's more interested in knowing how the hell you knew how to get there in the first place.

When you told her you grew up with spies she laughed thinking you were joking. You decided to tell her more stories in the hope it would distract her from the pain of the cuts she got in her legs from the crash.

It worked.

Carol had colorful patches on both her knees when you two sneaked out of there to the bus stop. You could take her home if she wished because you knew a lot about public transport but Carol smiled and said she could do it alone; Her dad was often not around and with soldiers brothers, she knew a lot about doing things by herself.

Yet, she appreciates the gesture and the thought. Her bus should be here in 25 minutes so you sit next to her and let your healthy knee brush her bruised one.

“My name is Carol Danvers by the way.” 

You have to chuckle at her line.

“I know who you are, Danvers.” You retort with an easy smile. She looks up with curiosity. You chuckle again. “You know your name is on the scoreboard, right?”

She laughs, almost shyly. You don't know that yet but Carol is not the best at making friends. Especially girlfriends because apparently, every girl hated how not 60s girly behavior she acted on as much as any boy.

You didn't mind. If anything, it kinda made you like her more.

“You didn't have to do that back there you know?” She starts over, fingers tugging at the bandaid you put above her knee. “Lose the race to check on me.”

You shrug, eyes on the road. “No worries. There'll be other races. Besides, you're the only real competition I get there. If you're not participating, what's the fun in winning?”

Carol's cheeks grow a little hotter, but you're both too young to know it has nothing to do with the sun above your heads. You offer her a smile and she gets up to signal to the bus.

But before she leaves, she turns to you again.

It's quicker than her crash that morning, the thank you little peck on your right cheek but is as meaningful as losing a three-year Invictus status on a track race for someone.

Carol nearly flees the scene once she catches the first glimpse of surprise in your expression. You were caught off guard, that's all. But all you can do is laugh to yourself as you watch her run to her bus.

Tomorrow, when you are back here, you'll find Carol so you can share your lunch with her. Today, you would walk home with no clue why the spot she kissed was tingling.

-&-

Two.

Shield Academy is not the army. 

It is, as the name suggests, an academic program for the gifted-minded. It's a place where a child who grew up surrounded by the brightest minds on the planet can get it easily.

Well, of course, there's a lot of studying and tiring exams that you wouldn't describe as easy but when taking everything into consideration, the only place a brainy - or huge nerd as Carol would call it - could end up was there.

So while you had big dark blue sweaters with the Shield logo on them, Carol had worn out public school uniforms. 

But she was doing okay. In fact, if anyone asked you, even though you were the nerd one in that friendship, for you, Carol was quite brilliant. She had a quick mind and such a strong, well, everything. She was as clever as she was kind. She was passionate about anything she cared for and she was easily your favorite person.

The kart track gave space for the public library and the green plains behind Shield Academia as you two grew up. Carol would take her bike from across town and spend the whole day after school in those green yards with you. Often, she had a football with her while you had a book.

And while you tried to escape your Shield colleagues, Carol would find her spot at your side. She would watch those training agents and wish to be like them, while both of you knew she would follow her brothers to the military when the time came.

But for now, you're sixteen. And Carol has been your best friend for almost 6 years now. You're not sure if friends have anniversaries or if it's something reserved for dating, and since you're not gonna ask any of the agents around, especially not Doctor Lawson, you just assume is okay to get Carol a gift.

She had been wishing for a walkman for so long - she had three already, all broke down during some of her naughty antics, from jumping into the reservation without remembering to take them off her backpack to get into a fight with older kids who thrown her stuff just for the fun of it. So yes, she had those before and she loved music but somehow she always ended up breaking them so you thought maybe because you were the one gifting it, she would be more careful.

You were right of course, but that's hardly the point.

Carol started to act strange after the gift. Even days later, during movie night at her house, she got quiet, which is definitely not a Carol Danvers kind of attitude, so you started to wonder if the present was a good idea at all.

That of course, until Carol clarified the whole thing.

“I got you something too. For, hum, the anniversary thing.” 

You pinched her ribs, the nearly shy behavior was such an odd thing to testify that was actually terrifying you. Carol has been your best friend for way too long for that or anything to be awkward between you two.

But then again, adolescence makes everything weird.

You don't open the gift very graciously. Because you were in the middle of movie night, of course, hands full of popcorn butter and Carol was being weird and suspect that you just wanted to put an end to it.

You chuckle at her worn-out team jacket there.

“So your gift to me is your jacket?” You asked with a confused frown, watching your friend struggle with her words the next moments.

“No, I mean yes. But not, just that.” She starts and it's quite the scene. Carol Danvers not being able to talk when that's all she does. “It's my favorite jacket. I… really like it.”

“Do you want it back then?” You suggest with a confused laugh but Carol shakes her head immediately, her cheeks rosy.

“God, no, that’s not…” she takes a deep breath. “I like the jacket, a lot, but not as much as I like you. So I thought, maybe if I can give you something that I really like, it will mean…”

“Oh, I get it.” You say with a smile, holding the jacket against your chest as Carol switches the weight in her foot. “Thank you, blondie. But you don't have to give me your favorite stuff to show me you like me. You don't have to give me anything at all really. Perhaps, all you have to do is say it and I'll believe you.”

Carol nods, shallowing dryly, and without missing a beat, she repeats her words from before: “I really like you.” It's nearly a whisper, and the way she struggles to hold your gaze tells you everything you need to know.

You smile, aware of the warmth spreading in your cheeks and ears.

“I really like you too, Carol.” You tell her and with no hush, you put her jacket on. The blonde in front of you takes a shaky breath once the jacket is properly around your body. You're distracted with the new outfit to take notice of the new dark shine her eyes hold. “Gotta admit it, Danvers, I could totally worm the athletic style. I mean, I look super cool don't I?”

But your question goes unanswered. Carol moves forward, her hands grab the collar of the gifted jacket and just like the first time, she kisses you quicker than you can manage to process.

Her lips are dry against yours because she's nervous. Trembling and terrified. You pull away, and Carol has her eyes closed tightly, breathing unevenly.

You take a deep breath and lick your lips to moisten them a little and the second kiss is much better. 

There's this soft noise she makes when you move your mouth but the second you feel her tongue on your lower lip, there's noise around you two.

As if getting electrocuted, Carol jumps away just in time for her evidently drunk father to stumble inside the garage.

Carol is not eight anymore, but she's the only one left in that house. Her older brother taught her five different ways to break someone's noose, but Carol still shakes like the leaves if her father is around with his harsh words and angry looks.

This time, however, he takes a long glance at you both. The guilty looks, accelerated breathing, and he just laughs.

The only thing he says is a slur that makes Carol flinch. Then he turns his back and climbs the stairs to his bedroom, passing out in the hallway before he can make it through.

“Carol, I-” You try but she forces a smile and nods at the door.

“Please go.” She asks. “I have to take him to bed and you don't have to stay.”

“But-”

“Please.”

You leave. And Carol doesn't bring up that night for the next two years.

-&-

Three.

Graduation means Army. More specifically, the Air Force because of course Carol Danvers wants to fly away from everything and everyone.

“Not everyone.” She frowns when you tell her that. Then she smiles, legs brushing yours at the back of her truck. “I would love to have you up there with me.”

You chuckle, giving her shoulder a little bump with your own.

“Sorry Blondie, you know I hate planes.” You joke but the shine in her eyes is deeper now.

“What about spaceships?” She insists it.

You sigh into the night, pensive for a second.

“Well, Mom would probably love it if I ever suggest anything that involves flying.” You say, breaking into a chuckle as your hand moves to the leg you have bent in that position, which allows you to trace your fingers toward your ankle. “Of course, anything other than my secret little Pegasus.”

Carol gives a compliance smile at the mention of the secret tattoo you got on her seventeenth birthday but continues to watch you in silence.

The stars are shining bright above you two, and the parked truck gives as much privacy as one could get in that neighborhood. If you and Carol weren't girls, people would make conclusions.

Perhaps they’ll do it anyway.

“What would I even do up there, Danvers?” You ask her because Carol is so passionate about flying that you're starting to wonder if she is able to see a whole different world up there that you can't.

This time, her hand finds you before her lips. She brings her fingers to yours resting on the truck and locks them. She gets closer and closer and gives you all the time in the world to push her back.

But she's Carol, and she's beautiful and she's your best friend. Why wouldn't you want to kiss her?

There's tongue this time. Hesitant at first then curious, until finally hungry. Of course, Carol Danvers is a good kisser, this asshole.

You break apart, to complain with a husky tone that is unfair but Carol only chuckles before kissing you again. And again. Until somehow you end with your back against her truck, painting into her mouth.

And Carol is seventeen years old and she's a huge virgin like you who really wants this to change tonight. Not just that, of course, but she's still a teen and that's exactly what she chooses to say in order to make this less life-changing than it is.

Because sleeping together as a way of ending high school without the V Card has a completely different meaning than sleeping together because you really want to ruin a friendship.

You swallow at her suggestion, aware that the heat in your veins doesn't cover for the way your heart just broke inside your chest.

But you smile and tell Carol you love her, making sure it sounds platonic. Just to hurt her just as much.

It works, but she kisses you anyway.

-&-

Four.

Maria Rambeau is the most incredible person you have ever met. She's clever and fun and kindhearted. It's so easy to love her and it comes so naturally, that you can't really blame Carol.

You also have no right to be jealous, you tell yourself.

After all, Carol asked more than once for you to at least consider following her to the Air Force. You both had military families, so it made sense for her that you both ended up following the same path.

You were not entirely excluded from that, of course. But unlike Carol with her soldier training, you had medical classes. And while she and Maria learned to shoot people, you learned to heal them.

That of course until the third year, when Carol's training moved to space crafting and yours moved to biological charts. The Pegasus was not the only military project available for you, and being home was good but every time you caught a glimpse of the empty fields near the station, you remember afternoons with Carol and the lack of her ache a hell lot inside your chest.

But visiting her at the base and then at a local bar was a bittersweet occasion.

Because time went by and Carol made a new friend. A lovely and brilliant and apparently less confused woman new best friend. Maria who made her laugh and blush and was such a great company that you couldn't hate her no matter how much the jealousy burned inside your veins.

Somehow, no matter how many dove eyes Carol threw at Maria, she didn't catch them. Immune to her charm entirely. You kinda wished she would teach you that.

The last free week you had was spent visiting Carol and ending up in a bar. But Maria's night was continuing with a good-looking soldier somewheres else, so yours and Carol's would continue with cheap drinks.

It was probably common sense, not to mix alcohol with feelings but you and Carol clearly skipped that class.

You ended up pressed behind the bar's wall in a messy attempt of drunken make-out with your former best friend.

Carol tasted like beer and the army's year changed her. Even drunk, she knew her way around a woman's body now and you had to force your stupid brain to stop wondering about who she had been practicing with. Perhaps Maria was not immune to her charm as you thought she was.

Just as things were getting out of hand, that is, it was probably against some army rules to have sex behind one bar in the military area, Carol pulled away.

She looked so good like that, with messy hair and flushing cheeks, her lips swollen due to the whole thing.

But her eyes were so sad. And you couldn't push the alcohol and the lust away to have clear thoughts on that.

“We can't do this again.” She declares with a seriousness that makes you swallow hard. “I can't.”

She stumbles away and you nearly slip down the hall on your shaky legs. Carol is looking for her car keys but she will definitely fall asleep on the seat.

To be fair, you kinda wished that night would end in her car seat, just in very different scenarios.

“Why not, Danvers?” You manage to question once the anger pushes a little of the alcohol away. Carol sighs tiredly. “Why?” You almost scream and she stops in her tracks, turning to give you a hurt look.

“I can't do this again, okay?” She retorts and she's drunk but she's so hurt. You can see it in her eyes and it kills you to think it is something you have done it. “I don't have the strength in me to get over you again”.

Your world freezes for a whole second. Your mouth is bitter suddenly.

“O-over me?” You repeat her words, confusion mixing with the pain you feel growing in your chest. “When… When were you under me?”

The question is the best of what your drunk brain can come up with but it's enough for Carol to understand.

She lets out a sad chuckle. “C'mon, Lawson. How could you not know? Everyone did. Even my dad, especially my dad.” She corrects herself then, bitterly before taking a deep breath. “It's past. It doesn't matter anymore. We are no longer kids, messing around with things we don't understand. I know what am I. And I know we shouldn’t. I won't jeopardize our friendship again for someone I cannot have.”

There are tears in your eyes, and Carol has the fucking worst timing in the world because your brain simply can't catch up with the meaning of this conversation with all the booze in the way.

“Carol, what are you even saying?”

She just smiles, giving a nod to the bar.

“Let's get inside, I'll get you a cab back to your hotel.”

She doesn't let you question further and the next morning, when the hangover barely allows you to open your eyes, Carol says the worst thing you did last night was try dancing with a Statue.

-&-

Five.

Doctor Lawson has been acting strange lately. She says it's work stress when she returns your calls and ignores your advice about her retiring.

You use your mother's stress as an excuse to come home, and it seems ridiculous that you have to invent reasons to see Carol, but she gives you no choice. Things have been very strange between you in recent months.

The house is a mess, and it's the first time you've worried about the possibility of dementia.

Strange phrases, disconnected words. You think about calling the head of Shield when you put Dr. Lawson to bed after making her some hot tea, but you end up calling Carol.

Your former best friend brings her old truck into your garage.

"Hey, blondie." She hugs you first at the greeting, and you sigh with satisfaction at the contact. You almost forget the stress of the whole meeting with your mother. "It's good to see you."

"I missed you." Carol says with a smile, squeezing you tighter before letting go. "What happened? You sounded worried on the phone."

You sigh before telling her everything you saw, standing there leaning on Carol's truck in the dim light of the garage. It's her turn to sigh when you finish.

"Good thing I brought beer." She comments, getting a laugh out of you. 

You don't even notice the time passing that night, but it's like being back in senior year, sitting side by side in the back of Carol's truck, forgetting the world around you for a moment.

When the case of beers is about to run out, you've said almost everything you have to say. Carol thinks she needs to add something more.

"I know the circumstances aren't the best but... I can't say I'm sad." She begins, looking straight ahead, a half-full can of beer in her hands. "With the possibility of you coming to live here again, I mean. I've kind of hated Washington since you left. And Shield too, for taking you away."

You giggle shyly at this and don't know what to say to Carol, so you just decide to hug her. But you're a bit dizzy after the third beer and miscalculate your approach. You end up too close to her face and can see almost in slow motion how the blue darkens or how Carol chokes on her breath.

"I'm sorry, I-" you begin in a hoarse voice, but she doesn't let you finish. The beer can slips out of her hand as she uses both to pull your face towards her.

It's an intense, messy, and passionate kiss. Carol swallows all the sighs that escape your lips as she presses her mouth to yours. Her tongue doesn't ask for passage. You melt against her and try your best to match her energy, suddenly feeling very dizzy, unrelated to the beer.

Her hands move from your face to your neck and down to your waist. Carol mentions pulling you onto her lap, but the balcony lights flicker on and she grunts as she pulls away.

You're still blinking spellbound at the whole thing, trying to catch your breath as she stands up, adjusting her hair.

"Fuck, I shouldn't have done that." She mutters more to herself than to you, hoarse and upset. You swallow dry. "I'm so stupid."

"Carol."

"You're so fucking stupid, Carol Danvers, I swear to God." She ignores your call, continuing to curse quietly to herself. You frown, but end up looking at the porch; your mother has woken up and looks just as lost as before and you really need to check on her.

When you get out of the truck, you touch Carol on the shoulder, and she turns around almost in despair.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that, I'm leaving-"

"Carol, shut up." You cut her off and don't let her say another word.

She shuts up immediately. "I really have to get back inside, and make sure my mom doesn't turn on any water or store the cat in the fridge again." You chuckle apologetically, stroking her cheek. "But I need you to understand that this isn't a mistake, an accident or a thoughtless act after a few beers. At least it isn't and it never was for me. We need to start talking to each other."

Carol nods quickly, swallowing as she looks down at your swollen lips. "Yeah, talking is good."

You smile, and hear the sound of the cat in the house and think you'd better start running. "Later, okay?"

"Later."

But your mother doesn't have dementia. She's not even allowed in a regular hospital. Shield is strangely private about everything, but you're practically coerced into signing confidentiality papers about the current state of Dr. Lawson, who seems to miraculously improve after spending an hour in a room with other agents.

Carol is the only person you can talk to about things, and she has news of her own.

"Maria is pregnant." She tells you, with a twinkle in her eye, without waiting for you to finish absorbing the news. "And she wants me to be the godmother!"

You're happy for Maria, especially perhaps because she's seeing that handsome soldier and she and Carol have nothing going on. Also, you need to tell Carol that you can go back to Washinton now that your mother is better.

"Oh, I thought..." The blonde hesitates as she hears the news, trying not to look upset by forcing a smile that doesn't reach her eyes. "I thought you'd decided to stay."

You're having breakfast in the living room of your house, Dr. Lawson is working upstairs. You swallow the bitter feeling of hurting Carol again.

"I would, for Mom. But why would I stay in Louisiana?" It's a rhetorical question because you both know very well what would make you stay. Carol laughs sadly, looking down. You get tired of pretending. " I would stay for you. I would stay for... us."

She looks at you in silence, a conflict of emotions on her face. "Don't be ridiculous, you can't just give up your career for a friendship-"

"Carol." You cut her off seriously, and she choked on her sentence, her eyes as tearful as yours. You give her a small smile, trying to ignore the way your heart is pounding in your chest. "You know that's not what I'm saying."

She swallows dryly, and despite reaching out to take your hand, she insists; "I'm gonna need you to say it."

"God, you're such an asshole." You gasp with emotion, laughing as tears of happiness escape yours and her eyes. Carol also laughs but waits. "Okay, Danvers. You've got me. I'm completely, irrevocably in love with you. I have been for a long time, maybe since the first time I saw you. And I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you."

Carol almost knocks over the coffee table when she moves in to kiss you but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

[ziminy]

Coming back to you

How to get back with your ex

Tags: smut, minors and ageless blogs do not interact, f!reader, normal au (because we suffered enough), my bbg Caleb the manipulative king he is (break me in half and all I'll say is thank you), implied stalking (if you squint), creampie, oral (f! receiving), fingering, marking, dirty talk, praising, size difference, little bit of crying, not proofread

Author's note: almost lvl 60 affinity with him, it was hard work and a lot of dedication. Trust me when I say I won't be able to recover financially from this any time soon.

Masterlist

Life was good when you were together, and somehow it even better after breaking up. It's not like your split up was messy, because you two parted ways on mutual accord, deciding that this isn't going to work since both of you were so busy lately. Why dragging the other down when you have your futures set?

In fact, the break up wasn't even supposed to be a break up, you were supposed to take a little break from each other that turned into a break up some time later. You said that you'd still be friends, that it's alright to talk and greet each other if you somehow managed to meet again.

But it was all lies. Both of you knew that. Because you never texted each other after that, and somehow you tried to avoid all the places he might be at. You don't really know why you're doing that, if just.. you feel a little uncomfortable looking back at what you two used to have.

Perhaps it was the way he looked at you, how he leaned down to talk to you, or that dumb smile that made your heart skip a beat.

He was caring, attentive, maybe a bit obsessive, perhaps a bit insane too. And maybe that what scared you, kept you away from dating again. Finding another one like him. God, what if you had the misfortune to wake up with another one like him at your door? You'd rather jump out the window than have the luck of getting another Caleb.

But he was good, in his own ways.

Well.. you can't really name any of his good traits at the moment, but he was a great guy. If you put aside his manipulative side, that he doesn't even try to hide to begin with.

You promised yourself to not fall for another guy like him, that empty words mean nothing to you. Threats had no effect, and you don't feel guilty anymore over things that you shouldn't be to begin with.

So, why was he here? You were supposed to meet with the old friend group, to reconnect and talk about the old days and how college used to be. I mean, he was part of the group, but why exactly was he here? And why did nobody told you he was coming?

"It's so good to see you guys!" one of your friends said, instantly jumping from person to person to hug.

"I feel like we're young again." someone else said, making you shake your head and let out a soft laugh. You can't show that you're affected, you're all grown now, you matured. He had no effect on you anymore. Even if it only been a year, you're still a different person that you were a few months ago.

"We aren't old to begin with." you said with a smile on your face. "How haves everyone been?" you sounded so calm, like you forgot how much stress was put on you back then. Everybody looks in much better shape after graduation, perhaps that place was rough for everyone.

"Let's just skip greetings and drink." of course there was that one person. "Caleb, you pay." everybody's eyes were on the tall man.

"You brought your wallet, no? Why should I pay." your eyes made contact for a moment, and you felt your face getting hotter. This night better go quick, because you don't know for how much longer you can handle this.

Everything was how it was back then, the way you sit in groups at the bar. How you found yourself next to the same girls you used to, deciding that you don't want to be loud and take it easy, just like before.

"So, how have life been for you? Haven't heard anything from you after we graduate." one of the girls looked at you, reminding you of how you chose to go no contact with everybody after your breakup.

"You and Caleb broke up? I thought you'd last a life time." is there nothing better to talk about?

"I'm a career woman now." you decided to change the subject, rather chosing to talk about work that your failed relationship.

"Oh?" why everybody looked so surprised was a mystery. But somehow you understood their reactions, you're also surprised you went this path.

"Got any boyfriends?" they still want to get info on your personal life, huh? Well, guess you won't be able to dodge that question any time soon.

"Nothing at the moment. Just focusing on work."

"I guess it's hard to date again. Normal guys must be so bland, not comparing to that piece of meat over there." you looked displeased with your friends choice of words. Yes, your ex might look good, but looks isn't what matters right now. Your well being was your top priority, and you enjoyed the freedom you had way too much.

"I'd be like that too if I had your ex. Imagine recovering from that." you don't even have to imagine.

"Is it even humanly possible to find somebody who's better than him?" their questions doesn't affect you, because you already know that you're the best you'd find. You understand and give yourself more than enough space that it's needed. So the right questions was if he will be able to find someone as good as you, because he won't.

"He's looking in this direction." the girls started giggling, and somehow, this was nostalgic.

Didn't this happened already? Before you started dating, right before you two confessed your feelings. Because somehow, you managed to do that at the same time. It was funny, if you're thinking about it. How you two were so in sync, you had no idea.

"Go talk to him." the girl next to you tried to push you, to make you get up and walk to the dark haired man.

"Don't want to." you kept avoiding any eye contact ever since you got in that bar. If you don't acknowledge him then he doesn't even exist to you.

"But he's looking at you." you grabbed the drink in front of you and gulped everything down your throat, trying to ignore him.

"Are you shy?" the girls started giggling again.

It was annoying. Why can't they understand that it's over? He understands this, so why can't they do it as well?

"We don't have anything to talk about."

"But he seems to want to?" it doesn't matter even if they point it out. It's been a long time already, you both moved on.

"Isn't there anything you want to tell him? Like things you didn't got the chance to while you were together?"

"This is the time to clear any bad blood between the two of you." but that wasn't necessary.

Frustrated, you looked in his direction. Eyebrows furrowed and biting on your lip so you wouldn't let out any curses you wanted to say at the moment. That classical expression, looking like he's good, even if there was no smile on his face, but he kept nodding to what his friends were saying. His eyes were betraying him however, those sleepy eyes, looking at you like you were more interesting, like he had to or else you'd evaporate from there or who knows what worse. It wasn't often when you'd see him like that, so you can't even answer your own questions on why he seemed like that.

No, if you payed attention to his surroundings, his friends might be annoying him. Saying something that he doesn't like, or.. they were talking about you. Just the way your friends were talking about him.

Was he feeling like that because he didn't want to talk to you either? No, you doubt that. It's probably because you refuse to give him any attention.

You turned to face the girls around you, who still seemed to push you to him. Maybe you should in fact go for it?

But, was there really anything that needed to be said? You don't have any regrets, you can't think of anything you want to say. And he's the same, even if he looked like he was holding back from time to time. You doubt he ever did something he's regretting. After all, you matched each other's freaks. You managed to stay together for that long just because you completed the other, understood yourselfs on a level no one else around you could.

Was this why you were pushed to him? Because everyone knew how well you fit each other?

You looked at your friends one more time, sighing as you finally gave up. You're still afraid to approach him, because he was still intimidating in a way you can't explain.

Or you can, because whenever you look at him you feel a chill down your spine. Your head was filled with stuff you said to him in the past, memories coming back to embarrass you, to make you forget what you want to do so you'd fuck up in front of him.

You stopped in front of him, staring at him as he looked at you. He still had that expression on his face, like you're still his softest spot, his weakness that makes him weak in the knees when he's around you. You opened your mouth, trying to say something but then forgetting everything once you looked into his purple eyes.

You can't be like this forever, you had to step up your game. You really had to move on, and maybe that's what you have to talk with him. Because he seems to be stuck in the past too. "You have time?" you noticed the way he almost raised his hand, to grab onto you and drag you closer like he always did. But he held back, because he knew this wasn't the time.

"Yeah." he tried to keep it nonchalantly, but you could see past his poorly executed facade. Should you feel happy with how you still affect him? You feel like you could laugh.

"Wanna talk outside?" you don't even know why you said outside of all places. You wanted to stay inside, where everybody else was. You wanted to have a reason to keep it cool, to not lose yourself in your emotions, because you know you'll fuck up if you're alone with him.

He got up, standing much taller than you as he followed you quietly. Seriously, this was like a deja vu. You still remember how you used to follow him just the way he's doing now. Not questioning a thing, and trusting him a bit too much. But you also had no idea where you're going. All you know is that you want to go outside, take some fresh air, say a few words and then go back to your friends.

For a moment, he got in front of you, opening the door and letting you walk out first. He used to do this all the time, didn't he? You almost forgot about it.

You walked a little further from the bar, resting your back against a building's wall as you looked at the sunset. No one said a thing, and the distance between the two of you was colder than the night's breeze.

"So.." a few words and then go back, that's all. You can go to your friends after this and rest. "How have you been." avoid eye contact, because you don't know when you'll fuck up, look forward, don't let yourself be distracted.

"Busy." his voice still makes something in your head ring, like a little bell that seems to not calm down until he said so. "You?"

"Busy." you couldn't even think of what to say, just biting your lip in frustration.

It was quiet again, like both of you forgot how to communicate.

For a moment, you looked to your left, at where the bar was, and then at him, catching him staring at you with a expression you can't quite explain. Sadness? No, it was a mixture of sad and frustration. And you understood him. He had you this close, next to him, and yet he couldn't do anything.

"You're bigger than I remember." you don't even know why you said that. It's just.. he looks different and you can't exactly say what it was.

"I stopped growing a long time ago." he kept looking at you, at the way you were scanning him for anything that it might have changed. "Maybe you're the one who shrinked." he extended his hand, he doesn't really know why, but it seemed alright in that moment. Like he knew you wouldn't run anymore. "My hands are still the same."

You looked at his palm, at his long fingers and at the way he looks so familiar, yet new. Like you forgot how his body looked for a moment, like you were back in the past before you two started dating. Because you did this back then too, you were in this situation before.

How he was trying to tame you, let you touch him just the way you want, explore and discover more. All just to show you how inoffensive he is, that he's not a threat.

And you bite the bait every single time. Taking his hand in yours, slowly touching it just to see if it was indeed like what you remember.

You should put more effort if you don't want him back in your life. Just look at you, you look like you've missed him so so much. You shouldn't be this sweet or else you might not be able to break up again this time.

He tried his luck, interlocking his fingers with yours, and showing you more of that size difference you haven't seen in a while.

You don't reject him, his actions only made you be more curious. What else was he hiding? You looked up at him, only to see that expression again. You really didn't understand how his eyes can be just this dark, like there was absolutely no life in them, only a purple abyss that seems to drag you in towards him.

"It's getting dark." he said in a low voice, forgetting that he was supposed not to scare you for a moment. "Let me drive you home." he's the same as ever. Getting ahead of himself just because he was able to feel your perfume for once, the same scent that you had since back then. It suited you, and he missed it.

"Alright." he always knew how to calm you, let down your guard so he can get more under your skin. Or perhaps you were doing that voluntarily, because he doubts you'd be like this just for anybody.

The ride back to your place was quiet, only the radio on, playing some mainstream songs over and over again.

The silence was loud, but not uncomfortable. It was better this way because you had nothing to say. And he will not talk until you talk.

But once you got to your house, you somehow didn't wanted to get out the car just yet. It's just.. can't he stay? You don't know why you want him there, and you don't want answers to that.

"You're.." you played with your fingers. "You're not busy, right?" you avoided his eyes, or to look in his direction at all. This was all his doing, wearing that one fragrance that made your head spin, and the shirt that he knew was your favorite. "Want to come inside?" you're doing this on your own accord. Because he wouldn't push you over your limits like this, especially when you just met again after a long time.

You came to him, you talked to him, and you dragged him into your home on your own. He didn't do anything, this was all your doing.

You were brave enough to make the first move, so he might as well reward you for it, no?

You didn't looked surprised when you started kissing the moment the front door closed behind you, you also looked unfazed when he started taking off your clothes, now going towards your bedroom, looking for a bed so he could place you on it.

How could you forget this feeling? Or the way he used to take care of you. Always stopping you from lifting a single finger, not letting you do anything until you start begging him, or worse, do things without even warning him first.

"Tell me if it hurts." he placed a kiss on your cheek before going down, biting softly on your skin and leaving kisses all over the places he touched. He was going to mark all of your body, so people would see a part of him on you even if you're not together.

He stopped when he got to your pussy, leaving a kiss on your inner thigh, before placing his lips over your heat. He was going to scream, he missed this so much that he just couldn't help but let out a lustful moan deep from the bottom of his heart.

How could you left him? Take this away from him, leave him all alone to suffer. If he didn't craved so much for you he would have punished you for it.

"You're so tight." he said as he got two of his fingers inside.

"It's been a while since I did it." he looked up at you from between your legs, placing a kiss on your clit.

"Have you done it with someone else?" he was asking as if he didn't knew everything you did while he was gone. And yet, hes jealous.

"No." you shook your head. "What about you?" are you questioning his loyalty?

"Did you touched yourself?" if this was his way of changing the subject, then it wasn't working. Because it only made you want to ask the same thing, embarras him just the way he did to you.

"Did you?" he should feel embarrassed, ashamed or anything between those two, but no, it was just you who feeling that way.

"Every time I missed you." seriously, can he calm down for a moment. You can't take it. "You didn't do a good job." he said, licking on your clit as his fingers curled up. "But I guess you can't do much with those fingers of yours." you couldn't face him when he was saying such dirty words. "Did you had a hard time stuffing yourself? Don't worry, I'll do it for you from now on." you placed a hand over his face, to cover his eyes so he would stop looking at you.

"Don't look at me." you whimper. "It's embarrassing." you were always so easy to tease.

"Alright." he moved your hand away. "I'm sorry." he was in fact not, but if that's what you want to hear then he'll lie again and again, as long as you're happy.

Your pleasure was more important to him. So he focused on that, paying attention to the places that made you melt, on your soft voice and your touch. You're still so hesitant, like you don't really trust him, like you're still testing the waters.

What more do you want from him? What can he possible give that he haven't gave you already? You have his heart, you have his mind and soul, his well being is all yours, his body and everything he owns. So give him attention, touch him more and tell him that he's doing good because he's about to burst.

For a moment he looked up at you, just to see how you're doing, to check on you and make sure you're alright.

How did he lived for so long without looking at you was a mystery. Why he accepted you leaving him and trying to move on. Who else is going to make you feel like this? You need him, you needed his cock and his touch.

But he's not going to fuck up, since it's been a while since you last did it, he shouldn't push you. So, he placed a last kiss on your clit before taking his fingers out of you, leaving you panting and waiting for more. He didn't even let you cum, how mean of him.

Still, how dumb of him, to come here with nothing on him, not even a single condom. I mean, it wasn't really his fault because he never knew he'll end up like this.

"Take it off, your clothes." you were all naked while he was still fully dressed. He also looked like he wasn't planning on getting undressed any time soon and it was annoying you.

"I don't have any condoms." that was the problem?

"It don't matter." you took him by surprise. "Come here." you knew how rail him up. And you better not regret your decision later.

You looked at him taking off his shirt, his defined muscles jumping right into your face. You were right when you said he looked bigger, he must be working out a lot more lately. He took his pants off after, your eyes on his hard cock as he came back next to you.

"Relax." he said when he got between your legs. "Look at me." it would only be harder for you if you keep overthinking. Yeah, he was big, so what. He's going to give you all the time in the world until you adjust yourself to take him. It's gonna be hard at first, but it's going to be so much easier once he models your insides into the shape of his cock. And that's a promise, believe him.

He slowly pushed the head of his dick inside your wet core, making you move a little from how it was feeling, trying to find a better position. He lowered himself, now his chest pressed against yours, placing kisses all over your face as he kept pushing more of him inside your warm pussy. It's alright, take your time. He's not going anywhere, he'll wait until you're ready for him to move.

"You're doing good." he whispered in your ear, his hot breath tickling your skin. "I'm all the way inside, see? It doesn't hurt." it hurts a little, maybe more than just a little. But wasn't it normal when he was stretching you like that? But just as much as it hurts, it also felt good, in a way that left your mouth watering. He was going to be the end of you, really.

"Move." you ordered him, wanting to feel more. Just being stuffed to the brim wasn't enough, you needed much more than that.

He followed your orders, moving his hips slowly, paying attention to your next move.

You were so cute when you're sticking to him like that, holding onto his shoulders and trembling every time he touched that spot deep inside that he wasn't trying to touch to begin with, to not overwhelm yourself.

He's going to give you everything you want, there's no need to rush. If this was how much you can handle then that's how much he's going to give you. So why were you grabbing him like that, and asking for more? "Deeper." but you couldn't take it? You're going to say that he bullied you later, and he doesn't want to take the blame for something you made him do.

"You're sure?" you nodded, looking at him through your eyelashes with a pout on your face. Alright then, if that's what you want. How could he refuse you?

So he got deeper, hitting that spongy spot with long slow strokes that seems to work wanders on you.

He kissed you, again and again, to mark everything that missed his touch. To make sure you feel him, more than just inside.

"Is it good?" he asked as if he doesn't know your body like the back of his hand.

"Mm." you nodded, leaning in to feel more of his warmth.

"Then say my name. Let me know how good I make you feel." how could you forget he was like this. He always had to mark his territory as if you're not already his. But unfortunately for him, you're not in the mood to fulfill his desires. Screaming his name seemed nice, but at the moment all you wanted was to feel him, have him to yourself and let nobody know about your business.

Maybe his greedy side rubbed on you, or maybe it's the other way around. Or not, because at the end of the day you both knew that your unsolved issues can't be fixed that easy, and it can't be passed into the other when both of you are insane.

That's why you're trying to consume each other in other ways.

Kisses that seemed way too loving for someone who just got reunited after a long time. Touches that linger on the other's body even after moving away. Whispers and words that really makes it seems like you two were just a day apart, talking about moving with him, how you don't need anyone else but him. And at the moment you're too drunk on him to even realize that you're nodding, agreeing to every little degrading thing he's saying.

You want him, don't you? You missed him, you were such a mess without him. Right? Why did you permited him to leave when he's made for you. "I love you." that's the most normal thing he said tonight. "I love you, you heard me?" you heard him, but if you're giving him an answer that satisfies him, you'll never make him pay for the pain he caused you.

"You do?" you didn't sounded loving at all, even if your arms were wrapped around his neck, looking at him in the eyes with something only he saw before, your lust and obsession.

"I love you." he'll say it until you finally give up. Placing a kiss right next to your eye, he caged you in his arms, a hand under your ass and lifting up so he could go even deeper than before. Move in even more, since you said you wanted deeper. He'll show you places you didn't even know existed if you're asking for it.

He can't say that he's a brat tamer, because he's not. He likes everything about you, your sweet side, your mean and angry side. He likes it when you punish him, it shows him that you care. And if you believe that he's not doing enough to deserve your love just yet, then he'll do more.

He liked trying after all. And he'd be damed if he said that he doesn't want to show you just how far he can go. Because trust him, you can't handle it.

He's going to eat you, or even better, sacrifice him as you see fit. He wants to be inside you forever, be part of you. Because he feels like he's finally at home only when he's with you, in your arms. And when he's balls deep inside you? He's in heaven.

"Does it hurts?" he licked your tears away, wanting to taste them and claim them as his.

You nodded, feeling his cock twitching before moving in a way that got you throwing your head back. This fucker. He thinks that he can just do this to you and not pay a price? And perhaps sometimes he forgets how you can be so cruel, mean, and play with his feelings in a way only you could.

All he needs is a look from you, fluttering those eyelashes in a pretty way, and a sad expression that he can't resist.

You win, if you wanted him to fumble, then you win. He's all yours, do whatever you want with him because he doesn't have the ability to think anymore. "Cum with me?" what gives you the right to ask such a dumb question when you knew that's the only thing he wants. If you're not, the he's not doing it either. He knows he's asking for too much, but let the man dream.

"I'll fill you up nice and pretty, alright?" he made it sounded like a question, but you both knew he was just letting you know.

"Mm." you nodded, your lips smashing together the next moment. Eating each other out as you were both so so close. Touches becoming more and more desperate, his grip on so tight you won't be surprised if it leaves a bruise. But it's alright, because you feel like that's not quite enough.

More, you both needed more. And some heated sex after fucks knows how long won't be enough to satisfy the empty holes in you. You needed so much more.

Will you even be able to get out the bed tomorrow? Both of you. Because from the way you drag each other back, refusing to give up just yet was more than enough proof to show you won't step back any time soon.

But who knows, maybe you'll finally be happy by the time you both dry your energy out.

[loviingpedri]

you got a fetish for my love. - pedri

prompt: obsessed pedri is everything.

fwb; not an established relationship



warnings: grammar issues, kinda toxic tbh, explicit/suggestive content (no in-depth details, minors dni), cursing, not proofread,

credits to owners for all images

and there he was, at your door again.

you honestly felt bad for the man.

one call. that was the only thing he needed. he would be at your house within minutes just by a singular phone call.

and you knew he would always answer. because his fear would be that if you would leave him.

standing in your mirror as pedri hugged you from behind. he was admiring every detail of you.

your hair, eyes, eyelashes, lips, teeth, jewelry. he loved every part of it.

and you would imagine you were returning the favor for him.

he wishes.

you reapplied your lipstick. his favorite shade.

thinking to yourself, “what makes pedri so obsessed with me?” staring at yourself more, you knew why he wanted to be nearer. brushing out your hair with your fingers, pedri gently touched the strands.

you knew what he wanted. you wanted it as much as he did. can’t deny his appetite.

every time he visited, the guilt consumed you. both of you couldn’t get enough of each other. you took a deep breath and sighed as he was kissing your jawline, moving his lips down to your neck. he deserved better. someone who could love him. someone who had all the time in the world for him. someone who wasn’t just a fuck buddy. you tried to tell him, but one thing that goes into one ear, goes out the other.

every time you try to push him out, he comes right back. there wasn’t any point of blaming him. it was a situation that neither of you could escape. he’s got a fetish for your love.

as he pulled down the spaghetti strap of your shirt, his voice sent shivers down your back. “if i were you, i’d do me too.” his whispers made your ears ring. it wasn’t a good idea to continue this situationship. you felt like you reached your limit to this. you craved for something more. for real love.

you couldn’t blame him for this. it was a mutual decision made. to you, it was like an automatic vow that you couldn’t catch feelings. it was embarrassing to admit that you failed. you were hooked to his body, like he was hooked to yours.

taking you over and under and twisted up like origami.

“i’m so obsessed with you. the way you walk, the way you talk.” knowing he was smiling while casually doing what he does best, you didn’t wanna push him out anymore.

pedri figured out he was getting under your skin. you usually played hard to get, but something changed in the air.

the rumors among your friends that you were doing each other was already insane. you didn’t want it to be public, but your mind was changing as pedri’s hand was on your shoulder.

you weren’t expecting to catch feelings for him. or were you just trying to sympathize?

feeding pedri’s fetish was done. but what if it was the opposite. all along, you thought it was him who was addicted. what if you had a fetish for his love? it was a valid explanation to why you couldn’t stop calling him. it also explained why you felt lonely when he wasn’t with you. the tables have turned. you couldn’t take it anymore. you were hurt by the thought of him leaving now. the pressure was growing, a need to open your mouth and talk about it.

“pedri,” you spoke low as he was gently rubbing your arm, trying to get comfortable cuddling. “can we talk about something?”

“of course, what’s on your mind?” he kissed the top of your head.

“what if we took things seriously? no more playing around? we can’t keep doing this forever.” the silence was killing you. you were feeling anxious for his response. what if you were just imagining things? what if you only thought he was hurting, but it was only your imagination. what if this was his plan all along?

“maybe.”

[stolenorchids]

WARNINGS - this drink may include the following: fem!reader, use of y/n, phone sex, teasing, marking, oral (fem!receiving), mutual masturbation, use of the word 'god' (not really a warning, however apparently people get triggered by it, so, y'know), swearing, only proof-read once - I think that's all, but please let me know if I missed anything^^

ALC percentage - 5.7% (5.7k words)

the stream was in full swing, the chat buzzing with emotes and inside jokes as Shoto leaned back in his chair, his mischievous grin practically lighting up the screen. his voice carried that playful confidence his fans adored, and his vtuber model mimicked his smirk perfectly.

"alright, chat," he drawled, glancing at the cascading wall of messages. "we’ve got a guest today - someone you all seem to be obsessed with. can you guess who it is?"

the chat immediately exploded with excitement: "IT'S HER!!" and "FINALLY LET'S GO!"

"you guessed it. let’s welcome the one and only-" he paused, dragging it out just long enough to make the anticipation unbearable. "our very own shy queen."

the discord call connected, and your voice came through, soft but warm. "hi, Shoto. hi, chat." the stream erupted with hearts and inside jokes. Shoto tilted his head slightly, his avatar following suit, as he leaned closer to his mic. "you sound nervous, y/n. am I making you blush already?" you chuckled softly. "you wish, Shoto."

the chat exploded.

for the next hour, the two of you bounced off each other effortlessly, the rhythm of teasing and laughter keeping the energy alive. Shoto, true to form, leaned into his flirtatious side, making sure the chat was in on the fun.

"you’re too quiet, y/n," he teased, his voice dipping into mock seriousness. "you’re supposed to help me carry the stream! unless…" he leaned closer, his avatar’s mischievous smirk sharpening as his tone softened. "you just like hearing me talk, huh?"

the audience immediately erupted, spamming "HE'S AT IT AGAIN" and "RIZZ MASTER."

Shoto grinned, fully expecting the usual shy laugh and change of topic. but this time, you surprised him.

"you know," you said after a pause, your voice light but steady, "I do like hearing you talk. it’s cute: watching you try so hard to impress me."

the silence on his end was deafening, though only for a moment. his vtuber model stilled for half a second before suddenly throwing its arms up in exaggerated shock as Shoto burst out laughing.

"WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!" he screamed out, leaning back in his chair, his avatar mimicking the motion. the chat erupted, spamming "SHE GOT HIM" and "CLIP IT CLIP IT!"

Shoto covered his face with his hands, his voice breaking into a flustered laugh. "y/n, you can’t just - where did THAT come from?!"

you grinned, enjoying his reaction. "what? you flirt with everyone all the time. I figured it was my turn."

"your turn?!" Shoto repeated, tugging at his hoodie strings. his model mimicked the motion, his face still red as he stammered. "chat, help me! she’s turning the tables, and I wasn’t ready for it!"

the chat doubled down, spamming "SHE'S TOO POWERFUL" and "RIZZ WAR DECLARED."

"alright, alright," he said finally, pointing toward the camera like he was accusing you of a crime. "you win this round. but don’t think I’m letting you off easy next time."

you giggled, your usual shyness melting away as you leaned into the playful atmosphere. "looking forward to it."

for the rest of the stream, Shoto was visibly more cautious, his usual flirtatious quips replaced with dramatic pauses as though gauging your next move. the chat noticed too, poking fun at how he was now "playing it safe."

but everyone could tell - this new dynamic was only the beginning.

the stream wound down after another hour of playful banter and shared laughter, the tension from your earlier comment still lingering in the air. Shoto’s usual energy had shifted slightly - not lessened, but… focused. every time you spoke, he seemed to hang on your words just a little longer, and the chat didn’t miss a thing.

"HE'S BLUSHING AGAIN," they spammed. "HER RIZZ IS TOO STRONG."

"alright chat," Shoto said, his voice carrying an edge of finality, though he still wore that trademark smirk. "it’s about time to wrap things up. any last words for y/n before we kick her out of the discord call forever?"

you snorted softly. "kicking me out already? I thought I was carrying the stream, Shoto."

the chat loved it, spamming "SHE'S TOO SAVAGE" and "ROUND TWO INCOMING."

"okay, okay," he replied, leaning back in his chair. his avatar mimicked the motion, arms crossing over its chest in a mock pout. "you carried… for like, ten minutes. I did most of the work."

"sure you did," you replied, your voice dripping with sarcasm.

Shoto chuckled, his laughter trailing off into a quieter hum as the chat started spamming goodbyes and hearts. "alright y/n, say goodbye to the gremlins before they start crying."

you laughed. "bye, chat. thanks for having me!"

as the discord call ended and the stream screen transitioned to Shoto’s “thank you for watching” animation, you sighed softly, leaning back in your chair. and just as you were about to close the discord tab, Shoto’s voice popped back in through a private call.

"hey…" he said, his tone noticeably softer now that the stream was over. "got a second?"

you clicked to rejoin the call, your curiosity piqued. "what’s up?"

there was a pause, the comfortable hum of silence stretching between you two. then he spoke again, his voice losing its usual bravado.

"so…" he began, drawing out the word as though testing the waters. "you really caught me off guard earlier."

you grinned, your confidence from the stream still lingering. "oh? wasn’t that the point?"

"okay, listen," he said, laughing lightly, though it carried a nervous edge. you’re not supposed to turn my own game against me. that’s illegal."

"illegal?" you teased. "I thought it was fair play."

"you’re dangerous," he replied, and this time his voice dipped just slightly - a subtle shift that sent a shiver down your spine. "and I don’t think you realize what you started."

his words hung in the air, the playful tone from earlier now carrying something heavier, something more deliberate. you felt your cheeks warm, though you couldn’t tell if it was from embarrassment or anticipation.

"careful, Shoto," you replied, your voice quieter now. "you’re making it sound like you’re planning your revenge already."

there was a low chuckle on his end, the kind that made your breath hitch. "oh, I’m not planning anything." he paused, his voice softening even further. "i’m just thinking about how bold you were today. it was…new."

"did you not like it?" you asked, your heart pounding.

"like it?" he echoed, a teasing lilt creeping back into his tone. "I loved it. but now I’m wondering if that boldness is just for show… or if it’s real."

your breath caught in your throat. there it was - that unspoken tension that had been simmering beneath the surface all night, now bubbling to the top.

"why don’t you find out?" you said before you could stop yourself, the words slipping out in a low, almost challenging tone.

the line went quiet for a moment, the weight of your words settling. when Shoto finally spoke, his voice was low, almost a whisper.

"careful, y/n," he said, his usual teasing replaced with something darker, more intimate. "you might not be ready for what happens if I do."

the silence after his words was deafening, the weight of them settling deep in your chest. you could hear your own heartbeat, pounding steadily in your ears as Shoto’s soft laughter broke through the quiet.

"speechless?" he teased, his voice carrying a low hum of satisfaction. "that’s a first."

you swallowed hard, gripping your phone a little tighter. his confidence was intoxicating, but the shift in his tone - the way it lingered in that space between teasing and serious - made your pulse quicken.

"not speechless," you countered, your voice steady despite the nerves bubbling in your stomach. "just wondering if you’re all talk."

that earned a sharp inhale from his end. his chuckle returned, darker now, like you’d just issued a challenge he was eager to accept.

"y/n," he said softly, his voice curling around your name in a way that sent a shiver down your spine. "you’re playing a dangerous game right now."

"and you’re the one who started it," you shot back, though your tone betrayed the mix of excitement and hesitation you felt.

"fair enough," he murmured, and you could hear the shift in his posture - the faint creak of his chair as he leaned forward, as if closing the distance between you, even through the screen.

the air between you felt thick now, the playful edge giving way to something far more intense.

"you know," he began, his voice quieter now, almost intimate. "i’ve always wondered how far you’d let me take this. the teasing, the flirting... I didn’t think you’d ever actually bite back."

"well, you seemed so confident," you replied, letting your voice dip just slightly, testing the waters. "I didn’t think you’d fluster so easily."

a low groan slipped from his lips, and you swore you heard his chair creak again. "you’re gonna regret saying that," he muttered, though there was no malice in his tone - just a simmering heat that sent your thoughts spiraling.

"am I?" you whispered, your voice barely audible, yet enough to make him pause.

for a moment, you thought he might laugh it off, but instead, he let the silence hang, heavy and charged. when he finally spoke, his words sent a jolt through you.

"turn your camera on."

your breath hitched. the request was simple, but the command in his tone left no room for argument.

"Shoto-"

"please." he added quickly, softening the edge just enough to make it feel like a choice. "I want to see you."

your hands trembled slightly as you adjusted your webcam, the soft click of the activation sounding louder than it should have. when your face appeared on your screen, you saw his vtuber model react in sync with him - his usual mischievous smirk replaced with a more focused expression, his avatar leaning in as if he were truly watching you.

"hi…" you said softly, feeling vulnerable under his gaze.

"hi," he murmured back, his voice lower now. "you look... flushed."

you bit your lip, suddenly hyper-aware of how warm your face felt. "well, whose fault is that?"

"mine." he said without hesitation, his smirk returning. "and I’m not done yet."

your breath hitched as his model leaned closer, and you could feel the tension in his voice. “you don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to see this side of you, y/n. you’re usually so shy. it’s cute, but… this?"

"what about this?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

"this confidence," he said, his tone dropping further. "it’s driving me crazy."

his words sent a jolt of heat through you, and you couldn’t stop the small smile that crept onto your lips. "good," you replied, surprising even yourself with your boldness.

there was a sharp intake of breath on his end. "god, you’re gonna kill me," he muttered, his voice carrying a raw edge that sent shivers down your spine.

for a moment, neither of you spoke, the silence filled with the weight of everything unspoken between you. when he finally broke it, his voice was barely audible.

"if I were there right now," he began, his words slow and deliberate, "I wouldn’t hold back."

"then it’s a good thing you’re not," you replied, though your voice wavered slightly.

"why’s that?" he asked, his tone sharp, challenging.

"because I wouldn’t either," you admitted, the words slipping out before you could think twice.

his low growl of approval sent a wave of heat crashing through you. "y/n..."

the way he said your name felt like a caress, and suddenly, the distance between you felt unbearable.

"tell me what you’d do," he said, his voice rough with restraint.

your heart pounded in your chest as his words wrapped around you, pulling you into a heady mix of anticipation and desire. the playful banter from earlier felt like a distant memory now, replaced by something far more intimate, far more dangerous.

"i’d…" you hesitated, feeling the weight of his gaze even through the screen. "i’d make you regret teasing me so much."

his laugh was soft, almost disbelieving. "oh, i’d love to see you try."

your confidence surged, the tension between you thick and electric. "maybe one day you will."

"i’ll hold you to that," he said, his voice a low promise.

the call stretched on for multiple hours, as the line between teasing and something far deeper had vanished. Shoto’s voice, warm and low through your headphones, filled the quiet of your room. the tension between you had reached its peak, and neither of you seemed willing - or able - to pull back.

"I don’t think you realize what you’re doing to me," he said, his voice rougher now, like he was struggling to keep his composure.

"what am I doing to you?" you asked, a playful lilt in your tone, though your body betrayed the growing ache that his words ignited.

"everything," he admitted without hesitation, the single word wrapping around you like a tether, pulling you closer to the edge of something you’d never expected.

the camera feed was still on, his vtuber model animating on one side of your screen, but the image seemed distant now, insignificant compared to the sound of his voice and the heat in his words.

"you have no idea how long I’ve thought about this," he continued, his tone slow, deliberate. "hearing your voice like this, knowing how flustered you are right now. it’s driving me insane."

"i’m not flustered," you tried to argue, though the breathy quality of your voice gave you away.

Shoto chuckled softly, and the sound sent shivers down your spine. "don’t lie to me, y/n. I can hear it in your voice. you’re just as caught up in this as I am."

your cheeks burned as his words pulled a soft gasp from your lips. you shifted slightly in your seat, the ache between your thighs growing impossible to ignore.

"and you’re not helping," you muttered, your voice quieter now.

"good," he replied, his voice dropping lower. "I don’t want to help. I want to make it worse."

the intensity in his tone made your breath hitch, and you bit your lip to keep from making a sound. Shoto’s sharp intake of breath told you he knew exactly what you were doing.

"don’t do that," he said softly, his voice almost a growl.

"do what?"

"bite your lip," he replied, his words sending a jolt of heat through you. "you don’t know what it does to me."

a rush of boldness surged through you, and you leaned closer to your mic, your voice dropping into a whisper. "what if I do know?"

silence followed, heavy and charged, before Shoto let out a low, frustrated groan.

"y/n, you’re killing me," he muttered, his voice strained.

"good," you replied, echoing his earlier words, your confidence growing with every sound he made.

the air between you crackled with unspoken desire, the distance between your two rooms feeling unbearably vast. you could hear the subtle shift of his chair, the faint rustle of fabric as he adjusted himself, and the thought sent a flush of heat through your body.

"tell me what you’re doing right now," he said suddenly, his voice rough with need.

Your breath hitched, the vulnerability of the question sending a thrill through you. "I…" you hesitated, your pulse pounding in your ears.

"don’t hold back," he urged, his tone softening just enough to coax you forward. "I want to hear you."

your fingers trembled as you trailed them over the hem of your shirt, your voice barely audible as you replied. "i’m…touching myself."

a low curse slipped from his lips, the sound unraveling what little composure you had left. "fuck, y/n," he muttered, his voice filled with raw want. "you have no idea how much I wish I could be there right now."

"tell me what you’d do," you whispered, your own voice trembling with anticipation.

Shoto’s response was immediate, his words spilling out in a husky rush. "i’d start slow," he said, his voice like a caress. "my hands on your thighs, pushing them apart so I could see you. i’d take my time, make you beg for it."

a soft whimper escaped your lips at the vividness of his words, and Shoto groaned in response.

"are you touching yourself now?" you asked, your voice barely a breath.

"yeah," he admitted, the rawness in his tone making your whole body thrum with heat. "I can’t stop thinking about you. the way you sound, the way you’d feel under me..."

his words broke something in you, and you let your own restraint slip, your soft gasps filling the space between his deep, ragged breaths. the distance between you no longer mattered - every word, every sound, pulled you closer together, until it felt like you were sharing the same space, the same air.

"Shoto," you murmured, his name slipping from your lips like a plea.

"i’m here," he replied, his voice a quiet promise. "i’ve got you."

your breath came in soft, uneven gasps, your hand brushing over your thighs as Shoto’s voice wrapped around you, pulling you deeper into the moment. his tone, once playful, was now rough and unrestrained, each word carrying the weight of his desire.

"y/n," he murmured, your name falling from his lips like a prayer. "tell me what you’re feeling right now."

your cheeks burned as your fingers slipped beneath the hem of your shorts, trailing over the sensitive skin just above your inner thigh. "I feel…" you hesitated, your voice trembling with need, "warm…needy."

Shoto’s low groan echoed through your headphones, sending a shiver down your spine. "fuck," he muttered, his breath hitching. "keep going. tell me everything."

you bit your lip, your movements tentative as your fingers dipped lower, brushing against the damp fabric between your thighs. "i’m so wet," you whispered, your voice barely audible.

"god," he breathed, his voice filled with longing. "do you have any idea what you’re doing to me right now?"

"tell me," you urged, your confidence building with every sound he made as your hand slipped the fabric of your underwear to the side.

his voice dropped lower, rough with restraint. "i’m so hard, y/n. I can’t stop thinking about you."

the confession sent a jolt of heat through your body, and you let out a soft moan, unable to hold back. Shoto’s sharp intake of breath told you he’d heard it, and his reaction only fueled your need.

"let me hear you," he said, his tone commanding but tender. "I want to know exactly how good you feel."

your fingers slipped beneath the fabric you just pulled to the side, gliding over the slick heat between your thighs. you let out a soft, breathy whimper, your head falling back against the chair as you lost yourself in the sensations.

"that’s it," Shoto murmured, his voice like a caress. "touch yourself for me. pretend it’s me."

your movements quickened as you dipped your ring finger into your pussy, your breaths growing heavier as his words spurred you on. "Shoto," you gasped, his name falling from your lips like a mantra.

"i’m right here," he replied, his own voice thick with arousal. you could hear the faint, rhythmic sounds on his end, his breathing uneven as he worked himself in time with you.

"I want to feel you," you whispered, the words slipping out before you could think. "I want your hands on me, your lips..."

"say it," he urged, his voice tight with need. "tell me exactly what you want me to do to you."

your inhibitions melted away under the weight of his voice, and you let the words flow freely. "I want you to pin me down," you confessed, your voice trembling with a mix of shyness and boldness. "I want to feel your hands on my thighs, your fingers inside me…"

Shoto groaned deeply, the sound sending a wave of heat crashing over you. "fuck, y/n," he muttered, his voice strained. "i’d spread you open so I could see every inch of you. i’d take my time, make you beg for more."

the vividness of his words sent you spiraling as you added your middle finger, the added friction only fueling you on as your movements grew desperate and you chased the release building inside you. your soft gasps and whimpers filled the space between you, mixing with Shoto’s rough, uneven breaths.

"i’m close," you whispered, your voice barely audible.

"me too," he replied, his tone ragged. "cum for me, y/n. let me hear you."

the command in his voice pushed you over the edge, and you cried out, your body trembling as waves of pleasure washed over you. Shoto followed moments later, his deep, guttural groan filling your headphones as he reached his own release.

the silence that followed was warm and heavy, the air between you still charged with the intimacy of the moment.

"y/n," Shoto murmured after a while, his voice soft and filled with affection.

"yeah?" you replied, your heart still racing.

"I meant what I said," he continued, his tone quieter now, more vulnerable. "if I were there, I wouldn’t be able to hold back."

you smiled, a warmth spreading through your chest. "maybe one day you won’t have to."

the heat between you hadn’t subsided, not even hours later. after you’d both succumbed to the intimacy of the moment, the call lingered on, neither of you willing to let go of the connection you’d found. Shoto’s voice, once playful and teasing, had softened, carrying a warmth that made your heart ache in the best way.

"are you still thinking about it?" he asked, his voice low and intimate.

"about what?" you teased, though the flush in your cheeks betrayed you.

"don’t play coy," he murmured. "you know exactly what."

your lips curved into a smile as you leaned back in your chair, feeling the warmth of the screen light on your skin. "maybe I am," you admitted, your voice soft but honest.

"good," he replied, the smirk audible in his tone. "because I can’t stop thinking about it either. about you."

the weight of his words settled over you, sending a thrill through your chest. for so long, the playful banter between you had felt safe, like a dance you both knew the steps to. but now, it was different - real, raw, and impossible to ignore.

"you know," he began, a hint of hesitation creeping into his voice, "i’ve been thinking about seeing you. for real."

your breath caught, your heart skipping a beat as his words hung in the air. "you mean…?"

"in person," he clarified, his tone firmer now. "I want to meet you, y/n. I want to see your face, hear your voice without a mic, hold you..."

the vulnerability in his voice made your chest tighten, and you felt a soft, giddy smile spread across your lips. "Shoto," you murmured, your voice tinged with affection. "i’d like that."

"yeah?" he asked, the excitement in his tone unmistakable.

"yeah," you replied, your heart racing at the mere thought.

the idea took root between you, growing more tangible with every passing minute. plans began to form - a weekend, a city, a quiet, private space where the two of you could finally let the tension between you reach its peak.

the hotel room was quiet, save for the soft hum of the air conditioning. you stood near the window, your heart pounding in your chest as you stared out at the city skyline. you’d arrived an hour ago, nerves buzzing in your veins as you waited for the knock on the door.

when it finally came, your breath caught, and you hesitated for a moment before crossing the room. your hand trembled slightly as you reached for the handle, the weight of everything leading up to this moment pressing down on you.

and then, you opened the door.

Shoto stood there, looking every bit as handsome as you’d imagined. his hair was slightly tousled, his dark eyes warm and intense as they met yours. for a moment, neither of you spoke, the silence stretching between you as you took each other in.

"hi.." he said finally, his voice softer than you’d ever heard it.

"hi.." you replied, your lips curving into a shy smile.

without another word, he stepped forward, his arms wrapping around you in a firm, grounding embrace. the scent of him - clean, warm, undeniably him - filled your senses, and you melted against him, your nerves easing as you felt the solid weight of his body against yours.

"you’re real…" he murmured, his breath warm against your ear.

"so are you…" you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.

when he pulled back, his hands lingered on your waist, his gaze searching yours as if to confirm that this moment wasn’t just a dream. slowly, he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a tentative, gentle kiss.

it started soft, testing, but the heat between you ignited quickly. his hands slid up to cup your face, tilting your head to deepen the kiss as his tongue teased against yours. a soft whimper escaped your lips, and he groaned in response, his fingers tightening against your skin.

"do you have any idea how long i’ve wanted to do this?" he murmured against your lips, his voice rough with restraint.

"show me…" you whispered, your hands tangling in his hair as you pulled him closer.

he didn’t need to be told twice. his lips trailed down your jaw, pressing heated kisses along the curve of your neck as his hands roamed your body, exploring every inch of you he could reach. when his teeth scraped lightly against your skin, you gasped, your nails digging into his shoulders.

"fuck-" he muttered, his breath hot against your neck. "you’re even more perfect than I imagined."

your knees buckled at his words, and he guided you back toward the bed, his body pressing you down against the cool sheets. his hands slipped beneath your shirt, the warmth of his palms sending shivers through you as he slid the fabric up and over your head.

"you’re beautiful," he murmured, his eyes dark with desire as he took in the sight of you.

heat rushed to your cheeks, but before you could respond, his lips were on yours again, hungry and demanding. his hands traced the curves of your body, his touch igniting a fire that burned through every inch of you.

when his lips trailed lower, leaving a path of wet kisses down your chest and stomach, you arched into him, your breath coming in soft, desperate gasps. the sensation of his hands and mouth on your skin was overwhelming, and the air between you was thick with anticipation, every small movement charged with electricity. Shoto's hands slid over your skin with deliberate care, his touch both firm and gentle, as if he were memorizing every curve and line of your body. his lips trailed over the soft skin of your neck, pausing to nip and suck, leaving purple and red marks that sent shivers through you.

"you're so sensitive…" he murmured against your skin, his voice filled with wonder and desire. "every little sound you make is driving me crazy."

your fingers tangled in his dark hair, tugging gently as you arched beneath him, your breaths coming in soft, uneven gasps. "you’re one to talk," you whispered, your voice trembling but teasing. "I can feel how much you want this."

a low groan escaped him at your words, and his hips pressed against yours, his erection evident even through the layers of clothing still between you. "you have no idea…" he muttered, his tone rough with restraint.

you reached for the hem of his shirt, your fingers brushing over the warm skin of his stomach as you tugged it upward. he helped you, pulling it off in one swift motion before leaning back over you, his bare chest pressing against yours. the heat of his skin against yours made your breath hitch, and you ran your hands over his shoulders, down his back, savoring the feel of him beneath your fingertips.

"god you’re beautiful…" he muttered, his lips brushing against your collarbone as his hands slid down to your hips. he hooked his fingers into the waistband of your shorts, his gaze meeting yours as he slowly began to tug them down. "can I?"

you nodded, your heart pounding in your chest as you lifted your hips to help him. his eyes darkened as the fabric slid away, leaving you in just your underwear. his hands roamed over your thighs, his touch both reverent and possessive, as if he couldn't get enough of you.

"god, y/n…" he whispered, his voice thick with desire.

the way he looked at you - like you were the only thing that mattered - made your cheeks flush, but the heat between your thighs demanded more. you reached for him, your hands moving to the button of his jeans, and he let out a sharp breath as you undid them, sliding them down his hips.

when he was finally as bare as you, he leaned down, capturing your lips in a heated kiss. the weight of him pressed against you, his hard length evident even through his boxers, and you couldn't help but let out a soft whimper as your hips shifted instinctively toward him.

"patience," he murmured against your lips, his voice teasing but strained. "I want to take my time with you."

his words sent a shiver through you, and he began a slow exploration of your body, his lips and hands tracing every inch of you. his mouth found the sensitive peaks of your chest, his tongue flicking over one of your nipples before moving to the other, his hand kneading the soft flesh as he sucked gently on the skin.

"Shoto..!" you gasped, your fingers digging into his shoulders as your body arched into him.

"that's it…" he murmured against you, his voice like a command. "let me hear you."

his lips trailed lower, leaving a path of kisses down your stomach, and when his tongue flicked out to tease the sensitive skin just around your still-clothed pussy, you let out a soft cry, your hands gripping the sheets beneath you.

"you're so wet," he murmured, his voice filled with awe. "is this all for me?"

"yes…" you whispered, your voice trembling with need. "only for you."

his eyes flicked up to meet yours, and the intensity in his gaze sent a wave of heat crashing over you. "good," he said softly, his breath warm against your skin. "because i’m not stopping until you’re screaming my name."

as he hears the soft whimpers you let put Shoto quikly drops his head down between your thighs. you let out a breathy sigh as he licks along your thigh, forming small, purple marks.

your head falls back against the pillow as Shoto drags open mouthed kisses up your thigh to your pussy, eyelids heavy and lips parting. you gasp, feeling his tongue sweep along your folds, almost teasing.

your fingers twist the sheets beneath you, back arching up off the bed as your hips jerk when Shoto sucks on your clit, his teeth grazing it just enough to let a shock run through your body.

he moans against you, not specifically loud, but obscene as one of your hands fly from the bed to his hair, tugging lightly at it.

you can feel the way he whimpers against you at your tugging, however he doesn’t look up at you, too focused on his tongue inside of you and the almost euphoric taste you bare. your thighs tighten around his head and you look down at him, your eyes half-lidded and bottom lip tugged into your mouth as you tug harder on his hair.

“fuck…” you breathe out, eyes widening slightly when you notice Shoto grinding his hips against the bed, desperate and erratic, trying to get himself off.

the sight alone sends a shock through your body, a loud moan escaping your throat as you push his head further into you, your lashes fluttering and thighs trembling on either side of his head. as he sucks on your clit your hips instinctively jerk up to grind harder against his face. you squirm as his tongue drags in and out of your pussy repeatedly, your moans turning almost pornographic.

your vision feels blurry and your thigh muscles burn as his tongue fucks you closer and closer to release. 

you try to nudge him, letting him know that you’re close. the lewd sounds of your moans, the sloppy sound of his tongue driving itself in and out of you, flicking over your clit, as well as the creaking of the bed, it’s all too much for you. you can’t keep this up. you fail to notice how your warning comes out as a garbled slur of incomprehensible words.

your entire body spasms when you cum, thrashing in his hold, your free hand flying up to grab the pillow behind your head as you cry out. “ahh!! Shoto~!” as you come down from your high you realize that he must have cum too, as you can feel the way his hips still against the bed, and you distantly hear the moans muffled against your pussy ‘god, he’s shameless,’ you think again as you lay limp against the bed, reeling from your intense orgasm, completely forgetting about how you had sounded the same, if not worse, mere seconds ago.

"are you good?" he asked softly, his forehead resting against yours as he caught his breath.

"more than okay…" you replied, your voice still breathless, and as you lay tangled together, your breaths evening out and your bodies still pressed close, you knew that this was only the beginning of something far deeper - a connection that neither of you would ever let go of.

[valiwrites]

Hi! can you do a fic about Marc Bernal where he's super obsessed and clingy w his gf and when they're out a group of girls are trying to hit on him, but he doesn't keep much attention to it and when he finds his gf he got completely glazed and just has eyes for her.

EYES ONLY FOR YOU

pairing: marc bernal x reader

type: fluff

warnings: none

<><><><><><><>

Marc Bernal wasn't the kind of guy who liked to go out much—well, unless his girlfriend was there. He’d become almost inseparable from her since they started dating, always wanting to know where she was, if she’d eaten, if she was happy. The kind of devotion that bordered on obsession, but in the sweetest way possible.

Tonight, though, she had convinced him to join her and some friends at a popular downtown spot. The lights were dim, the music was loud, and there were people everywhere. Marc was a little uncomfortable, not because he didn’t know anyone, but because he couldn’t see her. She had gone to the bar to grab drinks, and he hadn’t taken his eyes off the direction she disappeared in, but she hadn’t come back yet.

“Hey, Marc!” a group of girls called out, catching his attention for a second. They were standing near him, smiling a little too widely, their eyes lingering on him. He recognized one or two from his social circles—people he’d met briefly at events or through mutual friends. They seemed friendly enough, but there was a certain energy in the way they looked at him, as if they were sizing him up.

“You come here often?” one of them asked, stepping closer with a playful smile.

Marc gave a polite smile, feeling a bit awkward. “Not really, just here with my girlfriend tonight,” he replied, glancing around again, trying to catch a glimpse of her in the crowded bar.

“Oh, girlfriend?” another one of the girls said, her tone light, but with a hint of surprise. “Well, she’s a lucky girl. Must be hard keeping someone like you tied down.”

He chuckled, but his mind wasn’t on the conversation. He wasn’t really paying attention, only giving short responses, trying to be polite without engaging too much. Where *was* she? It had only been a few minutes, but his mind was already racing with a hundred different thoughts. Was she okay? Did she need help carrying the drinks?

One of the girls stepped even closer, clearly trying to flirt. “You sure she won’t mind if we steal you for a bit? You look like a fun guy.”

Before he could even respond, his eyes landed on her.

And suddenly, everything else melted away.

There she was, standing by the bar, laughing as she struggled with two cocktails in her hands. Her smile was bright, her hair glowing under the dim lights, and in that moment, Marc was gone. His heart skipped a beat, and a stupid grin crept onto his face. He had only been apart from her for a few minutes, but seeing her again felt like coming up for air after being underwater for too long.

Without a word to the girls still trying to get his attention, he made a beeline for her, completely oblivious to the whispers of confusion behind him.

"Hey, you need a hand?" he asked, slipping in next to her and gently taking one of the drinks from her grasp.

She looked up at him, eyes sparkling. "I can handle it, but thanks."

He leaned in, unable to resist kissing her temple. "I missed you."

She laughed softly, nudging him with her shoulder. "Marc, I was literally gone for five minutes."

"I know," he said, his voice warm and soft. "But it felt like forever."

They found a spot at a small table, and as they sat down, Marc’s attention never wavered. He listened intently as she talked, nodding along, smiling at every word. Every time someone walked past or a loud noise from the crowd caught his ear, he would instinctively lean closer to her, protective and attentive. The rest of the room faded into the background, all the people, the noise, the attention—none of it mattered as long as she was there.

“Are you even listening to me?” she teased, noticing the glazed look in his eyes.

He smiled sheepishly. “Always. I just can’t stop looking at you.”

She shook her head, amused, but there was no denying the warmth in her heart. Marc might’ve been clingy and a little too obsessed sometimes, but it was that devotion, that unwavering love that made her feel like she was the center of his universe. And as he leaned in closer, kissing her softly, she knew she wouldn’t have it any other way.

[eveningepiphany]

welcome to the final show | H.S, part 3

my masterlist!

part one and part two!

summary: harry goes over to y/ns hotel for a good old room service dinner, also getting a little tipsy on wine, while starting to blur some lines. and it’s not long before things are no longer just between the two of them.

warnings: fluff, swearing, alcohol, getting a lil wine drunk, paparazzi, being confused on if you’re falling in love or just really good friends.

a/n: i’m so excited to finally have this written for you all! i’ve had some pretty bad writers block, hence the delay in getting it to you, but thank you so much again for your support and I hope you enjoy <3

———

There’s a certain type of attatchment that comes around once and a while. It’s rare.

It’s when things start to flourish. Maybe with a hobby, a passion, or a new found person. One your brain decides to put all its focus and interest on, to the point it’s all consuming.

This one gets stuck to you like glue. Hard to shake in the sense of no matter how hard you try to ignore it, it’s all you can think about.

Losing yourself in daydreams of something or someone without even realising, until you’re reaching for anything that will bring you closer to filling that need.

That’s exactly what’s leading you to be reaching for your phone at any given point of the day.

You imagine many perceive it to be a permanent growth on your person. But you can hardly help it. Texting is a simple way to reach someone. Feel connected.

So, safe to say you’ve messaged Harry more than your own family over the course of this trip.

You’ve become attached. To Harry Styles. Again…?

Of course, being a huge fan it’s easy to say you should probably already be accustomed to this, given your level of obsession.

But this is a whole other ball game. One that is becoming like an internal battle. Your already unhealthy and predisposed infatuation paired with now a real physical connection is enough to render you useless.

You reach for your phone. Text him, your brain begs. You consider. No, stop being clingy you loser, your brain rolls her metaphorical eyes. You place the phone down. Stare at a wall. Think about him. Rinse, repeat.

Not normal, you don’t think.

However, you search for some kind of justification. That you’re just good friends, and all that shit. It’s normal to miss someone you’re friends with.

If he considers you as that.

Which you would hope since you’ve been texting him enough it would be concerning if he saw you as just some mutual of his.

You’re also sitting in a cafe, unfortunately without him right now. Eating a croissant wishing that he were here. Allowing your gaze to linger on the chair across from yourself, imagining his solid frame filling up the empty space. What he would do if you stood up and ran a hand through his hair, maybe lent down a little so you could just—

The ring of the bell atop their entrance chimes and drags you out if your dangerous and spiralling thoughts. And for some reason get excited like you’ve somehow manifested this man to walk through the cafe door by thinking of him.

Feeling silly at the nag of disappointment in your stomach as you see an ordinary bloke saunter over to the till.

Maybe one you would check out, or emit some kind of interest in before you properly met Harry. You would feel disloyal now. Like the parasocial relationship has entered an entirely new level of psychotic.

If it’s still parasocial, that is. Or if now you’re just simply a girl with very cloudy and mixed feelings about a very beautiful man.

You audibly sigh out. Eating the final bite of your admittedly delicious croissant and picking up your phone.

You type out a message, sending it before you can even think it.

I’m in a cafe right now without you and you’ve honestly ruined them for me. I miss you and your free cups of tea.

Without me? Rude.

You laugh at his quip, watching as the little bubble pops back up indicating he’s typing.

I’m out right now, but if you’re not busy later we can do something? Go out or I can come over to yours.

You pluck mindlessly at your bottom lip with your teeth, how could you say no to that?

You stress over it either way.

well, you’re very welcome to come over to my hotel room. we can order room service if you want?

To this he texts back an agreement, seemingly keen. And you realise immediately you have to tidy your room before he comes over.

You swing him the location of where you’re staying, including your room and floor number.

Thank you love, ill be there in like 3 hours say? If that works for you.

At that, you stand, because who are you if not over-prepared. And it was time to go make sure your room didn’t like a war had been waged in it when he came over for the first time.

Cant be having a bad impression, you figured.

———

You did in fact rush back to your hotel complex. Not even stopping a crepe stall you passed by, which had to be a first for you. You clean the place until it appears well-kept at the least.

And once you’re finished, you easily fall back into overthinking the whole thing. So excited, yet getting those anxious jitters like a caffeine addict 12 hours no coffee.

Which is why you decide to busy yourself with an afternoon shower. And at the time you’d still had over an hour to go.

You take of course longer than you intended, and shortly after you come out there’s a knock at your door, easily making you jump as you tug a shirt over your head. Regretting the last minute decision for a shower since now you have wet hair and probably look like a right mess.

But it’s not like you can leave him out there while you go blow dry your hair, so you rush over to the door, and tug it open.

His brows shoot up, and a smile slowly blooms on his face as he takes in your appearance.

Your hair is still near dripping, and you stand in bike shorts and a loose tshirt. The most casual he’s ever seen you. Which he loved the look on you more than he admits to himself.

“Hi darling,” he smirks, a warm feeling settling over him as he keeps his eyes on you.

“Hey, Harry.” You stand for a few moments longer, finally shuflling out of his way to let him through the door. He is adorning a white shirt and has the cutest little bandana around his neck.

“I’m sorry,” You laugh, gesturing him inside, “I was drastically overestimating how long it would take me to shower… hence why im in this state.”

He pulls a hand from behind his back, a cup being presented to you.

“Don’t be silly, y’not in a state at all.”

“You’re joking—“ You gently take the cup from his ringed hands, “Harry!”

“M’sorry, m’sorry. I saw a coffee van on the way and I couldn’t help myself.”

“Did you get one for you?”

“No, but I did have a little sip of yours.” He confesses with a quiet laugh. But he quickly busies himself with your room, padding around and peeking out the balcony window.

You take a sip, watching him examine your space. Grateful you cleaned it.

He asks you a few questions about random things in your room, and you settle yourself on the foot of your bed, cross-legged.

You didn’t really think about the lack of seating in your one man room. But this hardly bothers Harry, since he’s scoped up the room service menu from wherever he found it, and sat next to you.

“Alright… what d’we have.” He talks to himself, opening up the menu and scanning over the foods.

You discuss the options, settling on a pizza and pasta to share, because, well, you’re in Italy.

The night progresses easily as time always seems to do when you’re together, and you fake fight over the best kind of pasta sauce. But he lets you have to last slice of pizza so peace is made shortly after.

“Should we order a wine or something? T’wash the pasta down.” He suggests as the sun begins setting.

“Why not, I won’t say no to some wine.”

That gets ordered to your door, and you go from the foot of the bed to lazing at the head of it. Sipping on wine and recounting old stories, or discussing stupid topics.

“Do you think the chicken or the egg came first?” You swirl your glass around, eyes shifting to look at his side profile as he gazes at your roof.

His cute nose outlined by the warm light off the lamp, which you flicked on in the corner after it got dark.

He bursts out into a laugh, “what kind of question is that?”

“I feel like it indicates the sort of person someone is.” You shrug, smiling.

“What like it gives you an intel on my personality?”

“Something like that.” You nod, “and decides if we have to stop being friends, if you answer the wrong one.”

He grins, “Well, maybe tell me which one to pick so we don’t have to do that.”

“Awh, so you don’t want to stop being friends?” You coo, still staring at him, watching as his eyes flick from the roof over to you.

“Of course not, who else am I meant to go on cafe dates with.” He laughs.

You’re both teetering on the edge of being tipsy, and it’s evident in the way you’re both talking to one another. Borderline flirting, probably a more fitting way to describe it.

“True, because I’d be very hard to replace.” You snort with sarcasm, taking the another sip of wine.

“You would be! I love our little dates.” He smiles, the second time he’s dropped the word date in the last minute.

You’ve scooted closer to one another somehow. Shoulder to shoulder as you steal glances of his beautiful face. Maybe this was subconscious, or on purpose. But you’re drawn to him like a magnet.

“So do I…” You flush.

“I’m a little tipsy.” You clarify, breaking the searing eye contact and looking at the near-empty glass in your hand. A fourth refill would easily tip you over the edge.

He lets out a quiet laugh, “Wine gone to y’head too?”

“Mhm, and I have a track record of poor decision making when I have too much of it.” You recall the plenty of times you did the stupidest shit just because you were wine drunk. Hoping that does not happen tonight.

“Might have to see it one day.”

“One day…” you agree, but you realise that you’re not really in Italy for much longer. You have about a week and a half left now.

“I… Harry,” you turn your body to face him, and he sits up a little, noticing the almost serious tone to your voice.

“I’m leaving soon.” You blurt it out, because it’s the only topic of conversation you’ve both been steering clear of. The thing neither of you want to address because eventually this won’t be easy to do. Who knows how many miles could get out between you.

And it almost hurts you to admit yourself because… where exactly does that leave you both?

Does your contact end when you leave Italy? Do you become people who occasionally text on a bi-monthly basis?

He draws a breath, “So am I.”

You let out your own tortured sigh, turning to pop your glass on the beside table and then lean your head onto his shoulder.

Your heart jumps at the contact, and somewhere in your brain, sober Y/N lets out a gasp, because she would never have the balls to do that.

So the wine maybe was a great idea…?

He wraps an arm around your back, “I go back to London after this.”

“Second week of August as well?” You pray it’s not earlier than the start of the month, since tomorrow is literally the 1st.

“Yea, the 13th.” He nods and it’s the only tiny shred of relief you’re getting from all this. That there’s still time left.

“I fly out on the 12th.” You say quietly.

But there’s a small silence that consumes you both for the first time since you met. Because you’re kind of exasperated for options right now. What do you say to someone who is going to inevitably slip from your grip.

You shake your head at nothing in particular, moving to wrap your arms around his shoulders, since words really weren’t going to cut it.

Somewhere in his muddled brain he notes this is the second time you’ve ever initiated a hug. And he leans into it, the arm he had around your back tugging you infinitely closer.

Your cheek is pressed to his neck, and you swear you feel his lips ghosting over the top of your head.

Slowly, you pull back. And he watches you with sharp green eyes. You hold that gaze, until he’s the one that breaks it. Stifling a groan with his hand, covering his face.

You look at him quizzically.

“I like this more than I probably should.” He gestures now between the two of you.

You chuckle, a tiny flutter in your stomach announcing it’s presence.

“So we’re making the most of the time left in Italy, then?” You put forward, ready to nearly wipe your schedule clean for the man.

Which, who could blame you?

“What are y’doing tomorrow?”

“Nothing, if you’re the one asking.” You laugh, and he smiles wide at your comment.

“Oh, is that so darling?”

You roll your eyes in attempt to be convincing, “of course, you always buy me tea so…”

“Well, that decides we’re going to another cafe I suppose.” His hand reaches for his phone strewn on the quilt somewhere, pulling up google maps to find some nearby cafes.

You perch your head back onto his shoulder to watch him scroll through the options. He stumbles on a beautiful looking one, less than a 10 minute walk away. He looks to see if you approve.

He peers down to where you rest on his frame, smiling unwillingly at the sight of you. Your own eyes trailing up to meet his.

And he swears they linger on his lips. Just for a fraction of a second.

“Mh, what d’ya think.” He gets out, voice suddenly several octaves lower. Almost gravelly.

You almost audibly gulp at the sound of him. Hyperaware of his existence right now, you could nearly zone out thinking about the strength of his arm muscle that’s right now pressed against you.

“Yea… yea that looks amazing. And tomorrow, what time?” Your hands fiddle with themselves in your lap.

“How about 1, since you’re probably gonna wanna sleep in a bit.” He suggests, free hand pushing his curls from his eyes.

The way he knows you’re probably going to want to sleep in. God.

“I’m down.” (Bad)

A smile erupts over your face, and you almost forget that the clock is still ticking. That you only have so long left here.

Which ‘almost forgetting’ isn’t enough to stifle the urge to use it as some kind of yolo shit. Because that is unbelievably strong. Like why not just invite him to stay the night?

Maybe another glass of wine and you can gaslight yourself into cuddling him and just falling asleep. He wouldnt leave unless he had to, so it’s an almost flawless plan.

———

The plan infact, was flawless.

To say the least, he slept at yours. In your bed.

I mean you don’t really remember it, since you talked into the early hours of the morning and drank some more alcohol to really top it all off.

You woke up under the covers, still clutching onto Harrys side.

He was already awake, scrolling on his phone, seemingly unbothered by the fact your head had taken residency on his chest.

You take the initiative to glance at the time in the upper-right corner of his phone, a little shocked when it reads 11:47am.

You do groan at the morning light streaming in the windows immediately after seeing the time though.

“G’morning. D’ya have a headache?” He asks with what you can only assume is the end of his morning voice. Which although just a taste, is enough to send you spiralling.

It’s also around now you realise he’s stripped down into boxers— still clad in his white shirt. What the fuck!

You struggle to form a coherent response.

“Morning. A little.” Your voice comes out as a hum.

Somehow, considering you’re cuddling him right now and you literally just slept in the same bed all night, both of you outwardly are quite relaxed about it.

Nothing is awkward. It feels lovely.

“I want a croissant so bad.” You huff, sitting up, stomach growling like as if you hadn’t eaten in a whole 24 hours.

“So, you’re the kind of person that’s hungry immediately after they wake up?” He laughs, hand coming to push the locks of your bed hair out of your face.

Outside of the sheer domesticity of that (which makes you literally have heart palpitations), your hair is a proper train wreck.

The humidity in Italy has made it horrific.

“I guess I am right now?” You reply to his previous ask, combing your fingers through the locks.

“Jesus Christ.” You curse at its uncooperativeness.

“Y’know that episode of friends where Monica complains about how the humidity fucks her hair, she was so right.”

“I love friends.” He immediately gasps, nearly jolting upright in excitement.

You laugh at his enthusiastic reaction, noting that you have to somehow find time over the next week to watch an episode or two with him.

“And if it’s any consolation, I think your hair looks great.”

“Yea well, it’s not like you’d really be able to relate to the frizzy hair. Since yours look so perfect all the time.” You joke.

This evokes a genuine flush on his face, “Alright, Y/N, calm it down.”

He’s laughing but you swear he actually looks a little flustered. Without the wine as a confidence booster, he seemed like suddenly he didn’t know how to take a compliment.

Unbelievable to you since he probably gets that many a day from strangers on the street.

“I, am going to get up and get ready then, so we can go out and eat.” You state, excited to be seemingly spending the majority of the day with him.

He holds back the urge to beg you to stay in bed with him, and says something nonchalant as if he doesn’t mind you getting up. But when you pad off to the bathroom he stares at your now empty space. And immediately shivers at the lack of your body warmth, despite the already warm humid weather.

After a few trips in and out of the bathroom you come out looking beautiful. And he has to get himself up and ready to go in attempt to not overthink it.

You craved his closeness the whole time it took you to prepare for the day. Every few minutes you’d get this almost overpowering urge to just go out there and throw yourself back into his arms.

It’s borderline pathetic. But now you’ve had him in your bed, his strong arms coddled around you, it’s very hard to not to be just that. His physical presence is perfect and comforting. You’re attached to that as much as any other aspect of him.

He puts on his pants, which were folded neatly on his own bedside table, plucking out the car keys in his pocket, “Im gonna nick down to my rental car, because I have an extra button up in there, so I’ll wear that out.”

He comes back and changes into said white button up, stripping his worn shirt off and leaving it somewhere.

Just like that, you’re ready to go, and you both decide to walk the short way there. It was too nice a morning to not.

The whole walk you’re chatting away as usual. But it’s paired with this newfound physical aspect. The way you so obviously want to be close it hurts.

Yet somehow you both act like it’s nothing. That the brushes of hands and shoulder as you’re in step beside each other is a simple coincidence.

And that when you get breakfast, the two croissants and shared cookie is just a friendly thing. In your head you’re even playing off the touching all throughout breakfast.

Which sounds dirty— but just the little conversational touches. Like a hand reaching out to touch a forearm in laughter, acting as if it adds something important to the moment being shared.

Or that somehow when you leave the cafe, with two takeaway cups of tea, the hands that end up interlinked softly between the two of you is just…

Well… who even knows anymore?

Because you’re walking through italy beside Harry— who is talking about his favourite kind of playground equipment, regardless of if he’s a near thirty year old man— all while holding your hand.

And to take a moment, because it’s important, his hands are everything they’re talked up to be. Littered with chunky rings and calloused fingertips from the years of guitar playing. Yet contrasted by his soft palms, which cups yours with this delicateness it almost brings a tear to your eye.

You also pray that your own hand isn’t sweating profusely in his grasp, because you wouldn’t put a clammy hand past yourself. The already humid weather paired with your anxiety surrounding this whole situation is quite literally the match made in hell.

Nothing about this can be passed off as casual to your brain anymore. You’re literally about to implode.

But you strive to hide it. So you solider on.

“I’m a seesaw girl okay. Hear me out—“

“No, I can totally see that!” He interjects, and you chuckle at his quick agreement to your statement.

“Right? They are so much fun. And even though I nearly took a tooth out playing on one when I was 7, I can still recognise they are superior.”

To that he laughs and bumps his shoulder into yours, “I mean I love that. I’m probably a swing person, I feel like no matter the age I will always be down for it.”

You can agree that a swing is a solid second favourite for you. And as you talk about that point with him, you don’t realise you’ve walked the whole ‘scenic’ route back to your hotel until you turn the corner and the entrance is around the corner ahead. And the way you went usually takes an extra 20 minutes.

It went so fast.

“Are you gonna head off or… come back up with me?” You ask gingerly, the hand not interlaced with his fiddling with the fabric of your clothing.

“Not sick of m’yet?”

“Never…” You shake your head, smiling as he gleams at your answer.

“M’flattered. The feelings mutual love,” he chuckles, “However I do have to go remind my family I’m alive. But it’ll only take about a day until they’re pleased for me to ditch them.”

Gently runs his thumb over your knuckles, whether it be subconsciously or not, “So tomorrow night ill come back over to yours for dinner if you y’want?”

You smile, a little sappy over the way he’s working a plan out like you’re both teenagers, “Yea, thats perfect, and we can try something else off the menu.”

“Maybe, if you want,” he begins carefully, “after that you can come over to where we’re staying. Meet my mum and sister. They’ll love you.”

Now you’re nearly bursting at the seems, “Oh, I would love that, H!”

“Okay, it’s a plan then.” He agrees, pulling his keys from his pocket.

You bid your farewells for the night, unlinking hands and being left with a tingling sensation in it, one that you wonder if he’s also getting.

You go to your hotel room and feel full with joy.

He is all too sweet for this world. And you’re a little obsessed.

———

Although Italy being in Italy feels like being in a bubble, and like you’re so far away from the real world, it is unfortunately a purely mental one.

And there’s one thing about a headspace like that, and it’s just how quickly it can be popped.

At midnight that night a notification pops up on your phone, one that when you open, you have to physically put your phone down.

harryflorals:

what do i even caption this post because is that who i think it is or am i officially delusional? “HARRY WITH A FAN FROM THE LAST SHOW, HOLDING HANDS IN ITALY!” correct me if I’m wrong YALL idek anymore.

And this time, there’s no grain saving your ass. Because this was taken on what, quality wise, looks like a digital camera.

Which has made it so painstakingly obvious that it’s you. And you don’t even remember it being taken?

It was when you were walking back from the cafe, holding hands probably talking about fucking seesaws.

And everyone has caught on fast, because in the comments it’s an all out frenzy.

So, cats officially out of the bag.

———

y’all can expect a part four considering i lowkey left this on a cliffhanger 😝 so its on its way my loves

update: next part, PART 4!

taglist:

@harrystylesgirlie @purple9950 @teamspideyman @rociolunaa21 @spiritofbuddha @lemonhrry @deamus-liv @Iquvlly @kuntxrgraudunkelbunt @hsfanficsrecss @hsstylesrings @saturnheartz @victoriasigaard @lilfreakjez @mrsvxder @skxawngs @theekyliepage @hannah9921 @shiffpring @multifandomsw @roslastyles420 @slutforcoffein @kittenhere @stylesfever @butterfly-lover @daniizstyles @padf00ts-l0ver @sunflowervol18

+ all the anons who sent stuff to my submission box, thank you to you guys too, all my love

[milkemie]

you are honestly being so disrespectful towards the japanese culture. you clearly fetishize asians and someone even told you kindly that its not realistic to wear kimonos inside because they are uncomfortable and you just completely IGNORED that person, saying that you dont like to play realistically but thats so disrespectful?? you clearly have no respect for real japanese people and the way that your sim maya, a BLACK woman participates in the japanese culture and pretends to be japanese is SO WEIRD. you clearly have a fetish and need help. also i have seen you talk japanese in twitter and honestly get off google translate, youre being disgusting… and the way in one of your posts shin calls mayumi "mayumi-chan" is weird considering that youre not even japanese and it sounds like fetishizing… you clearly watch too much anime and have no idea what kind of country japan really is so stop acting like you know the culture when in reality youre just a anime obsessed weeb who probably doesnt even shower!

i can & will make my sims wear kimonos at home, i sometimes make them wear formal american clothes at home too. the person who made the comment about the kimono even said they totally understood me, so why don't you? i've also seen plenty of japanese simmers who have sims who wear kimonos all the time, shin & maya wore kimonos at home in one video and you're acting like i insulted the whole japanese population

yes maya is black, that doesn't mean she can't participate in japanese culture, her husband is japanese and they live in mt komorebi so of course she will participate in japanese culture. are you saying that we can only play with asian sims in mt komorebi?? i myself have been to japan before and participated in japanese culture, i even went to a traditional onsen where i had to wear a yukata, so you saying i have no idea what japan is like is a little funny

most of my asian mutuals are japanese and they actively support my content, you are clearly not japanese but for some reason you think you can speak for them as if they can't speak for themselves which is so paternalistic

i don't need google translate to write まゆみちゃん, shin is japanese and he will keep calling his child 'mayumi-chan'; my japanese mutuals call mayumi まゆみちゃん too

5. you're a coward for doing all of this anonymously lmao, for someone who hates me you sure seem to keep a very close watch on all of my content, you're obsessed with me in a very weird way but no matter how hard you try, you will not scare me into stopping sharing shin & maya's story so stay mad i guess? i will not reply to your messages anymore btw, i've given you enough attention

[familyvideostevie]

october thirty-first

day thirty-one: steve harrington last halloween didn’t end that well for you and steve. but this year? much better. | a no good at waiting one-shot, fluff, smut, mdni, 18+ | 2.4k detailed content warnings: fem!reader, smut, p in v sex, unprotected sex, creampie, thigh riding, riding, dirty talk, some aftercare-ish

“We're doing it this year, Steve.”

Your boyfriend looks unamused from behind his aviators. The sun set hours ago but he won't take them off because it “compromises his costume.”

“Jesus,” he mutters. “For real? You actually want to?” You both know Steve isn't great at saying no to you, even when it comes to going on the haunted hay ride at this year's Sara's Farm Halloween Festival. Steve only had to work the first few hours and make sure no one sustained bodily injury during the pumpkin carving contest, so now you're walking around, taking in all the fun.

You're pressed close to him — it's cold, no surprise for Indiana — and wish you had another layer on. Steve convinced you to dress in vaguely Top Gun themed clothes to honor the movie he's been obsessed with since you saw it in theaters. He's in a patched aviator jacket, jeans that hug his ass sinfully, and the stupid glasses. You've tried to look like Tom Cruise's savvy analyst girlfriend by putting on a leather jacket and red lipstick.

“We're grown ups,” you say, bumping his shoulder with yours as you approach the line for the hay ride. “We can handle it.” Robin and Eddie are working the route again and this year you're pretty sure some of the high school kids are, too. They all begged you to get Steve on it and what's love if not taking a chance every now and then to pull a fast one on your partner?

“Speak for yourself,” he mutters but allows you to tug him on to the wagon. He places his hand on your thigh automatically and does his best to look unamused but flinches when the whole thing surges forward and into the dark rows of apple trees. “I can't believe I'm doing this.”

Neither of you handle it well, truth be told. There are only a few other people on the bales in the wagon bed and you and Steve for sure scream the loudest. Your friends catch on to your presence quickly and clearly make it worse for you both, jumping out of the trees and reaching as if you pull you both to the ground. But it's fun. It's fun in the way most things that give you an adrenaline rush are — you scream and laugh in the same breath, pressing closer and closer to Steve until you're practically in his lap as the wagon rounds the final corner.

That's when you feel him hard through his pants.

“Really?” you ask. “Keep your hands to yourself, Harrington.” He scowls and tightens his grip on your hips so you don't fall when the wagon jostles side to side.

“I can't help it, honey.” You wriggle a little more and his fingertips press harder into your skin. “Stay still.”

You do not stay still. It's just too much fun to mess with him like this — something you do often in your new house. Teasing him from room to room and reveling in the thrill that he wants you. Steve always wants you.

The feeling is mutual.

When the ride finally ends you mean to tell Steve that Eddie and Robin are going to meet you so you can all hang out, but you don't get the chance. Your feet barely touch the ground after stepping off the wagon when he grabs your hand and drags you through the crowds.

“Steve,” you say incredulously. “Steve, what are you doing?” You try to keep up with his long strides so he'll hear you.

He doesn't stop until you slip around the apple bobbing and against the wall of the farm store. He crowds you against the wall, suddenly in your space, face close enough that you can count his eyelashes. His pupils are blown and his cheeks are even more flushed than they were on the hay ride.

“If you think I'm going to stand around about to cream my pants, you're insane.”

You swallow and feel his words between your legs. “Oh,” you breathe. “Okay.”

He tugs on your hand again and you're off, snaking behind the store and further into the grounds. It only takes a few more moments before you realize that he's leading you to his old loft. You laugh into the night air and Steve looks back with a boyish grin, the intensity of his gaze somewhat faded back into the comfort and ease of your relationship.

Though he doesn't live here anymore you know that Hopper hasn't gotten around to renting it out yet and Steve still has a key. “Don't trip,” he teases as he tugs you up the spiral stairs. He takes a few seconds to dig out his keys and get the right one in the lock. You want to touch him so badly you entertain jumping him on the landing but he gets the door open quickly and you stumble inside.

“Thank Christ that worked,” he mutters. The loft is empty of the things that make it Steve but the furniture is still there, including a made bed, which feels like a miracle.

“I'd fuck you in the barn,” you say. Steve wiggles his eyebrows and once again crowds you back against the door.

“Oh, yeah?” he mutters. He shoves a thigh between yours and gently tugs your head to the side so he can trail his lips up your neck. You feel his cock, somehow harder than before, and wiggle for friction. “You still know how to surprise me, bee girl.”

“Steve,” you gasp. “Don't tease.” He could quip about your actions on the hay ride, could drag it out and make you a whimpering mess here against the door by barely touching you, but he doesn't. Steve always wants you just as bad as you want him. He presses his lips to yours in a bruising kiss, cradling the back of your head as he presses you into the door.

It is not lost on you, even through your lustful haze, that this time last year you were doing the same thing. A night that changed everything, that almost broke everything had it not worked out in the end. It makes you more desperate, makes you slide your hands under his shirt to feel his skin, makes you grind harder on his thigh and swallow his moans. You almost gave this up. You almost ruined it.

Steve licks into your mouth and your tongues meet, desperate and messy and then he palms your breast, thumb swiping at your nipple and you keen.

“Bed,” you manage to say. “Bed, Steve.”

He sucks a spot on your neck for a moment more before releasing you. His hair is a mess, lips spit-slick and swollen and the way he looks at you makes your knees weak. “Come on,” he says softly. He sheds his costume as he goes, jacket and shirt and sunglasses tossed on the floor. You follow his example as he closes the curtains and shucks off his jeans.

“Are these sheets clean?” you ask, tossing your bra aside. Steve looks his fill and you let him.

“Hope so.” His eyes meet yours and for a second you're sure he's remembering last year, too. How tender it was, how he fucked you sweet and slow, how you left him.

Things get a little desperate after that.

You shed the remainder of your clothes and he sits against the headboard. You admire him like that, cock hard and already leaking, chest rising and falling as he pants though you've barely done more than kiss. You can feel how wet you are, feel the tightness in your belly just by looking at him.

“Baby,” he groans. “C'mere, please.” You crawl up the bed to him and straddle his thigh. He presses his fingers into your skin, eyes wide as you start to grind on him. You move your hips back and forth until you find a rhythm that catches your clit in a way that makes you gasp.

“Oh, god,” Steve moans. “Look at you, huh? Getting my thigh all messy, fuck.” You lean forward so he can press his face to your chest and tongue at your nipples.

Steve keeps up his filthy babble. “Barely touched you and you're so wet,” he says. “Feels good? Getting all worked up?” He pants your name over and over. “Look so pretty like this, baby, riding my thigh.”

“Wanna ride you,” you manage to say. He bounces his leg a bit and you whine. You reach down and fist his cock clumsily.

Instead of replying Steve shifts you over and lines himself up with your entrance. “You gonna be okay?” Your eyes lock. He means with the stretch, with the position. With fucking him bare. You and Steve have been doing that for a while now and you know he loves it, how he can feel every inch of you and fill you up without worry. You like it, too.

“Steve.”

“Okay, okay,” he laughs. You sink down on him and both grown in unison. The stretch comes without any pain, feels like you and Steve were made for each other, as it always does. “Holy shit,” he says, panting into your neck. “Never gonna get over this. How tight you are, how you have a perfect cunt—”

You cut him off by starting to move, a slow circle of your hips that has him choking on his words, his babble dissolving into your name and nothing else. You can feel his mushroom tip brushing the spot inside you that will have this over all too quickly, the vein along the underside of his cock that drags as you start to lift your hips. Steve does his best to help, hands firm on your thighs and meeting your movements with little thrusts of his own as he trails his lips along your chest, your clavicle, your neck.

“So beautiful,” he mutters. “So fucking good, you feel so fucking good —”

The hook in your belly pulls tighter and tighter but it's not where you need it to be. Your thighs are burning and you feel hot all over and you can hear how wet you are, hear the smack of your skin as you ride him. But it's not enough.

“I need — Steve —”

You reach down to give your clit some attention but Steve beats you to it, thumb roughly circling as you both start to move more frantically.

“I'm close,” he hisses. “I'm close, where do you want —”

“Inside,” you gasp. “Inside, please, Steve —”

He makes a noise that has your orgasm teetering on the edge, punched out and desperate. “Fuck, baby,” he says. You cling to him desperately as he shifts you, changes the position so you're on your back, legs around his hips. He fucks you hard, skin smacking, the filthy sound of your slick drowned out only be Steve's litany of your name as the hook pulls tighter and tighter.

“Let me fill you up,” he says. “Look so pretty with me dripping out of you, making a mess —”

You careen over the edge, fisting the sheets with one hand and dragging your nails down Steve's back with the other. Your eyes shut as you writhe, the waves of your climax rolling over you. You spasm around him, clenching over and over and his hips stutter and you feel him come inside you, the hot warmth coating your walls.

Your breath comes back to you as Steve flops down, still inside you, weight heavy on top of your spent body in the way he knows you like. His hand lazily trails up and down your side.

“Fuck,” he says. You laugh. The post-sex sensations set in, the gentle throb of your cunt where he's still inside you, the wetness of your inner thighs and the soreness of your muscles.

He shifts and you feel how full you are. “Made a mess,” you mutter. He presses a kiss to your temple.

“You made a mess,” he counters. “I mean, the thigh stuff?”

“Steve!” You feel shy all of a sudden.

“It was hot.” He squeezes your hip. “Let's get you cleaned up, yeah?”

He pulls out of you and the soreness stings for just a second. You feel him dripping out of you and feel hot all over again. Steve gets off the bed and heads for the bathroom. You watch him walk there, his cock shiny with you as it softens, the muscles of his legs and his back on display in the dim loft. The scars from various farming chores that you've traced hundreds of times, the skin you know every inch of. You love him. He's yours.

Steve returns from the bathroom and you try not to be self conscious about how you sit exposed on the bed. He's carrying a damp cloth.

“Spread 'em,” he says when he reaches the edge of the bed.

“Sexy,” you say, but do as he says. He snorts but gently cleans you, running the cloth along the insides of your thighs and your tender center. It's impossible not to feel a rush of affection for him as he does, this intimate act that is somewhere between sexual and not. You watch him and feel unbelievably precious in his care. He catches your eye and sees the softness, pressing his lips to your naval, your knee, but saying nothing. Sometimes you just don't need words.

“Let me pee,” you tell him when he finishes. When you return he's sprawled on the bed, boxers on. You pull on your t-shirt and nothing else and crawl up next to him, settling into his side. He drags his fingers along your back. You put your palm over his chest to feel his heartbeat.

“Better Halloween than last year,” he says lightly. The memory of that night isn't as heavy in your post-sex bliss, though it's still around. You've talked about it many times since then and it's in the past but being here reminds you a bit of the fear you felt, the frightening weight of the love you have for Steve. How it shifted your entire world.

Though you know Steve isn't serious, you sit up a little to look him in the eyes.

“I'm never leaving you,” you tell him. He looks a little surprised but recovers quickly, reaching up to cup your face and pull you down.

“I know,” he says. He kisses you gently, reverently.

“I love you,” you say against his lips. He laughs.

“I know that, too,” he says. “I love you back, bee girl.”

thank you for reading <3 reblog, send feedback, general masterlist here! promptober masterlist, find all fics under #fvspromptober23

[pandorasfavorite]

hi i have so many dom smut ideas!!

-reader is new social media person & dom constantly flirts with her, maybe inviting her out to a club with a few others & she has to sit on his lap & when he flirts with her he feels her pussy clench on his thigh & he calls her out on it and smut ensues

- mutual masturbation when sharing a room (maybe happens by accident or overheard)

- flirting with reader & getting needy and begging to be touched & she makes him put on a show or guide her hands because she enjoys seeing him pathetically needy

Filthy and teasing

AN: I'm doing all of these BTW. But we are starting with the last one because I crave needy Dominik. I'm trying to work on my characterization for him, so help me out, guys. OMG, he's so sexy when he's sweaty. Also, this is kinda of long and Filthy guys. WHY DO I HATE MY TITLES LOL.

You are obsessed with changing your outfits, almost every time you walk into the ring, you are wearing something new. Its always a variation of dark colors that represents the Judgement Day and it drives Dominik crazy. The way your outfits hugs your curves and shows off every bit of your body is chilling for him.

Seeing you walk into the dressing room in all black, and purple outlining the outfit at the curves of your boobs and ass makes him sallow. The outfit is modest for the most part but it shows just enough skin for the imagination, the top going into a V down your chest. Your legs are out and smooth, but with fishnets going all the way down.

Dominik doesn't even speak when he sees you, Finn was talking to him, but Dominik doesn't even remember the conversation. The only thing on his mind is how good you look, how easy it would be to rip those fishnets off and bend you over the counter.

You walk around the room leaning over counters and trying to find a spot, Dominik gets to see it all. Your ass looks so good in that outfit and all his thoughts are reaching his dick. Your outfit is just so tight and fitting, complimenting every inch of your skin. It feels like hours but you finally turn around and make eye contact with Dominik smiling at him innocently, like you were unaware of the effect you had on him. "Dominik! I'm talking to you", Finn says loudly from the other side of the room trying to break his concentration. "Stop ogling her man", Finn noticed just like everyone else. Damian laughs to himself and Rhea just grins looking off to the side.

"Sorry man", Dominik waves it off, even though he feels the burning in his cheeks from embarrassment. You smile genuinely and strut over to Dominik, you lean down and kiss his cheek, and some of your lipstick stamps onto him. "That's okay Dom. You can ogle me", you say to him not worried about the listening ears. Dominik looks up at you, everything but you is blurred in his vision, he revolves around you and only you. He can barely speak at your loving display, all he knows is that it's making it hard for him to keep it in his pants. You kiss the other side of his cheek quickly before yelling out a quick, "gotta go", not only him but the rest of the group. Everyone throws out 'bye's and 'good luck's and the door clicks shut behind you.

Rhea becomes super confused for a moment and she looks over to Dominik who is still stuck in the same position you left him in. "Aren't you supposed to be ringside?", she mentions. Dominik throws himself off the couch and curses while running, "Shit, I forgot". Damian slaps Finn's chest while joking, "Guess she did too" and he raises his eyebrows suggestively. Finn busts out laughing at some sort of underlying joke, Rhea just rolls her eyes and gets on her phone; enjoying her time to rest.

Dominik was in his own world for a minute there, you're so breathtaking to him that he couldn't find the words to say anything. Now he feels more prepared to speak to you, to get your attention that he aches for. Dominik managed to find you waiting close to the entrance, there were only 2 minutes until you were supposed to walk out. Dominik walks up behind you smacking and grabbing your ass suggestively, "God you look sexy tonight", he says huskily. You turn your head to the side to notice him, "Am I not every night?", you grin knowing his response.

"You know you are. This though, I've never been this hard", he moves to kiss your collarbone, his hair fanning over his face attractively. You feel him brush against you and he reacts strongly, whimpering without meaning too. Falling out of his dominant role accidentally. You spin around and press your front against him, You run your finger down his Adams apple and his chest, all just to grab him by the loops in his pants and giggle at his flushed face. He looks down at you, taking his hand to hold the side of your face and to rub your bottom lip, like he's considering leaning down and taking advantage of the position you're both in.

Your entrance music blasts and you whip around walking out, but with Dominik's hand clasped in yours. Dominik's eyes linger on you for longer than they should, fans will definitely notice the sexual tension between you both if he keeps it up. During your match you show out as much as you can, willing yourself to jump around to get the attention of Dominik; though you don't have to do much.

Dominik is starting to sweat; your beauty and his neediness not being a good mix, and he attempts to control himself. He closes his eyes for a split seconds and reminds himself over and over that he is on public television that he has to wait. Like clockwork Dominik ushers you out of there discreetly, wanting to grab and hold you to him and never let go.

You walk into the dressing room smiling proudly at your win, but Dominik just looks exhausted and ready to go home. Some would think he just ran a marathon but really all he's been doing is thinking about you on your knees bobbing on his cock. You take your time getting things out of your locker, longer than usual to be a tease. Dominik stands extremely close to you, he holds your waist and he lays his forehead on your shoulder. "Can we go now?", he asks squeezing his eyes shut; he's trying to force all of the dirty thoughts out of his mind for just a moment. You shake your head smiling to yourself, "I'm hurrying, just a few minutes". Dominik trails after you, every step you take he does too. Dominik taps his hands on the steering wheel shifting a bunch in his seat, impatiently.

You slide your hand onto his thigh trying to relax him but it just makes things worse. Dominik twitches at the proximity and at this point he's so hard it's starting to hurt, and his pants feel tight. You unlock the door and step into the house, Dominik rushes in after you, pushing you against the wall and sinking to his knees while he kisses down your body. He squeezes your thighs and kisses them erratically. You grab Dominik's hair pulling up a little to get his attention, "Stand up" you tell him without room for argument.

Dominik's eyes glint and his stomach flutters. The pulling on his hair alone makes him feel close to cumming. He raises up his face only a centimeter away from yours, his breathing fanning across your lips. His breath then becomes yours. You peck his lips and say the words that make him whimper in distress, "I'm going to take a shower". He rubs his clothed cock against your thigh and he closes his eyes breathing heavily, "Baby can it wait? Please- can it wait?", his fists clenching at his side. He shakes his head side to side, controlling himself, trying to last for you.

You pull on his hair making him groan and rut his hips more, "No. Go sit down, I'll be out in a minute". Dominik looks at you, trying to break your composure, to change your mind. You raise your eyebrows at him, daring him to argue. He pulls himself away from you, doing one more once over before moving to the couch. Sitting down and manspreading to release some tension. You smile mischievously and sway your hips while you walk, your bottoms ride up some, so more skin is right in front of Dominik taunting him. "Fuck me", he mutters to himself, the words slipping out seeing you walk away.

You take much longer in the shower, teasing him is so fun. While your in the shower you imagine him withering and trying to control himself, willing himself to hold off touching himself till you get back. You have only a towel wrapped around you when you walk out of the bathroom; small droplets of water run down your body from the steam. You step a few feet in front of Dominik and he swallows, "Gonna make me wait?", he says in false confidence. You drop your towel, water from your hair falling and running down your tits and thighs. You walk over and climb onto Dominik sitting your bare pussy onto his leg.

Dominik shudders at the sight of your dripping pussy sitting on his leg, You grind forward against his leg, the sound of wetness making Dominik moan. You kiss down the side of his face then under his ear, "You'll have to wait until I'm done" you whisper to him sweetly. You rock against his leg, your clit brushing against his flexed leg. Dominik's head lolled backward and he tried to compose himself but only pleas fell from his lips, "I need to be in you. Let me feel that tight pussy baby" Your other leg brushes against his cock just a little, "Fuck..fuck". His eyes squeeze shut and he grips the couch, "Mami, I'll do anything'. He feels his eyes well up in desire for you.

You still your movements when the idea comes to mind: Dominik moves his head to look at you. You move the hair out of his face to get a better look at him, "Okay. Show me what you want", Dominik's hands rush to touch your body but you grab his wrists before he can touch you. "No touching-", "Mami~", "Use my hands to show me what you want". Dominik swallows the whines of protests, he knows this is the most he is getting right now. He holds your wrists and puts your hands on your boobs. You moan quietly, starting to grind against him again. Dominik moves a hand down to slide down your stomach lowly and slowly, your pussy clenching at the proximity it brings. Dominik makes eye contact with you as he moves your hand to slip down to your pussy, your own fingertips grazing your clit.

You moan eyes fluttering closed while you play with your clit, Dominik aiding your movements. You twitch on his leg, his leather-like pants helping you glide against his leg easily. Dominik pulls your own hand back to put it on his chest, "Baby" he mutters like it's painful. You start to pull off his shirt, a relief for him, Dominiks positive he's getting what he wants. He lifts his hips up when you start to tug off his pants, his pants sliding off alone was enough friction to make his knuckles turn white from gripping the side of the couch. You sit on his lap now, his cock prodding and aching in need, leaking so much precum you thought he already came.

You kiss Dominik's cheeks and then ask, "What do you want baby?" you whisper in a seductive manner. Dominik's hips thrust up a little while he speaks, "Anything. Ride me, my cock, my face. Just sit on it Mami. Fuck just sit on it", the thought alone provokes his body to shake. You take your finger and run it down his cock and Dominik gasps his whole body shooting back. You wrap your hand around his cock and pumped him twice, your thumb grazing over the tip of his dick.

Dominiks dick twitches and his cum spills out coating your stomach and thighs, it all dripping down your body. Dominiks trying his best not to push you away from him, your warm pussy still laying on him. You notice his struggle and the way he’s pants with his lips are parted; overstimulated. You notice this, it’s so hot the way his body is begging for you, you stroke his cock; lifting a little to rub your wetness on him. “Mami wait. mmm s’too much”, A hand finds your hair for support and his other hand is lying on your bare waist to hold you still.

You ignore him, grabbing him by the base and slipping him into you. You moan at the slight stretch, how his cock fits into you perfectly. You lift up arching your back and you knock Dominik's hand away from your head, you grab his hand and put it onto the other side of your waist. You press your lips to him, your lips moving against each other, both of you trying to control the pace of the kiss. You hum into a kiss grinding back and forth, his dick moving inside of you. There's a fluttering in your chest from the overwhelming feeling of lust and pleasure.

“Taking it so well”, you say; fingers scratch down his back lightly, your pussy clenching on him, the smacks of your skin against his; one of the many things Dominik manages to grasp. His mind is flooded and mushy, he can’t comprehend anything but you and how long he’s been waiting for this, how badly he always wants you. Your thighs burn from riding him, to the point you want to lay down and take it. You slide off of Dominik, pleads tumbling from his lips immediately. “Baby?”, he looks down at himself making it so much more intense, “Don’t leave, let me help please - please”, he turns his body after you.

You lay on your back taking up the rest of the couch, you smile and put your hands above your head sexily, spreading your legs slowly for Dominik to take it in. Dominik licks the bottom of his lip, his eyes not leaving you. Like it’s instinct he grabs your thighs and pulls you flush against him and his cock. He spreads your legs further and he pushes into you cursing lowly.

He thrusts into your dripping hole mercilessly, his hips snapping against your ass. Dominik's hands grip your thighs to where it’s turning red, but his roughness feels so good, the switch in his behavior was sexy to you. Dominik rolls his hips, the tip of his dick hitting that spot inside of you that makes you moan loud and arch off the couch. “Always letting me finish the job and fuck you right, huh mami? Ain’t that right baby?” He grunts out his hair falling over his face some in the most perfect way.

You nod quickly your hands reaching to hold onto his biceps while your tits bounce at the force. He reaches down and plays with your sticky clit from his precum and your own wetness. You feel yourself clench around him and he moans. Your close with the feeling of Dominik inside of you pushing you close to the edge. “So tight -haahh- that’s it mami. Don’t run from it baby, so close”, your moan your vision goes dark for a second and your mouth falls open in a moan. Dominik smacks your ass and thrusts into you quickly, the tip of his dick being squeezed by your clenching pussy. Dominik cums and leans forward towards you, his eyes closing for a moment and his face blissed out. “S’so fucking good,” he says opening his eyes to see the love of his life fucked out with her chest heaving and lips wet with him.

[astradyke]

MY EXPERIENCE W/ TIT TOUR (tysons 2)

( written while looping I'm Not Okay (I Promise) by MCR, and also a car alarm going off outside my dorm room repeatedly :') )

NON-SPOILER SECTION:

SO many sweet people in line. someone gave us (me, my best friend, and my other beautiful friend) custom dan & phil stickers (pictured above), there was a lovely person in cat whiskers making sure people knew the difference between the gen admission & silver line, etc. phannies have the coolest fashion sense all the sick lovely lesbians were making me nervous... <3

s/o to my best friend's running capacity we were first in merch line!!! I am so endlessly happy with my photocard haul especially the uni hoodie one that one is my FAVORITE, also I love this long-sleeve so much. I almost got more merch but I held myself back and I think that was a good call! Also a super cool phannie made custom photocards and I got a silly dan one :D

y'all already saw but I met Clo @bitchslapblastoids who is the first mutual I have ever met in real life ever! between you and me... she is super kind and also really cool :]

our seats were so good!! balcony like row F or whatever but it worked out <3 our seatmate was also very kind!!!

pre-show people danced to HOT TO GO! and someone held up a Palestine flag and we all cheered! and people were moshing to von dutch which is so beautiful to me

SPOILER SECTION:

List of favorite jokes included: "Now our show passes the Bechdel test!" "I have kind of an aloof sociopath vibe going. ... which has worked for me :)" "[I am not satisfied on screen] What was that about? // I think I was just horny that day." "Scared of my life without you when I kill you!" "Dan had depression :D!!" "Enough about the gay, we've already done the gay// Enough about the depression, we've already talked about the depression."

No "sorry daddy, I mean father" line, which is devastating, BUT we didn't get the whole 'do you think Dan Howell' can commit schpiel with the wedding... much to think about

our conspiracies were pumpkin, faked sleepless night 3, bar, and wedding! i deeply wanted the other conspiracies i am so not going to lie but it's okay...

our "one minute" tangent was about electricity, clo made a post about this but they made a God and Adam joke because Phil tried to electrocute Dan and it failed so they were just awkwardly touching fingertips for a period of time

Nothing could have prepared me for the Phil on top of Dan choking him with the llama hat thing. Like i knew it was going to happen but still nothing could have prepared me. i think i fully grabbed my best friend's arm and shoulders and shook them a bit

our confessions and like nolemodel bit were really funny shout out DMV phannies!!!

Really made me sad when phil made the joke about babysitting like NO!!! YOUR CONTENT IS THE REASON I CAN SLEEP AT NIGHT WHEN MY PARANOIA IS BAD!!!!!!!! I LOVE U HIATUS YR CONTENT PHIL!!!! But his whole thing about the hiatus being a good thing in the end because it brought us here... <333

every segment felt perfectly timed and the entire show was just so funny and good. Like ultimately i can yearn for having gotten different conspiracies or slightly different vibes but altogether it was incredible.

THE SONG WAS LIFE-CHANGING. I knew more about it thru spoilers than I had thought but either way not only was it so fucking good, like, I'm going to get I-D-G-A-F it saved me tattooed. I have decided this.

WRAP UP THOUGHTS:

I first got into Dan and Phil when I was 11/12-- my first video was post Daniel Howell rebrand, and it was Daniel and Depression, I'll give you three guesses as to why my friend at the time recommended that video. I was obviously a die-hard phan at the time, reading phic and watching the compilations and obsessed with their gaming videos. I remember being like, unfathomably depressed trying to do math homework in bed, and just 'secretely' watching their videos instead. I can remember exactly when the first WDAPTEO dropped, and like how much I wanted to go to interactive introverts but was too scared to (I think I'm glad I didn't go for personal reasons) but my friends did go. I remember I was leaving summer gym class before I started HS when Basically I'm Gay dropped, and watching it-- but I was 13 almost 14, closeted, and while it resonated with me it didn't really hit me that strongly? I remember being most taken aback by the confirmation of their relationship, and the conclusion Dan left about his own sexuality had an impact on me wrt rejecting the constraints of labels, but it didn't really hit me crazily. during hiatus years I watched solo AP semi often but so much was happening... obviously, when the hiatus returned, i came back full force. when it's summer and i can't sleep at night, I watch AP hiatus years solo content; I watched most of the Dystopia Dailys; I saw We're All Doomed's digital release w/ the same best friend I went to TIT with; and obviously, you all have seen me talk about their collaborative content. But after that time, maybe even a bit before the hiatus ended, I rewatched Basically I'm Gay. after all I went through in high school (nothing quite like his experiences, but aspects of it resonated through), that video hit me like a fucking truck-- it made me realize the inherent amount that my queer identity played in my trauma, and it like... made me really emotional lol. also, Phil's openness about his chronic illness has meant a lot especially as I battle with my own-- not chronic illness, but, physical health battles. So when they sang IDGAF it saved me, that was like fucking earth-shattering to me, because they did save me! from when i was 12 years old struggling to do work, wondering why i was so tired every day but at least having them to cheer me up-- to being 19 years old, joints aching and emotionally stressed, watching their pizza mukbang 2 and seeing how much happier they are, how much happier I am. they saved me. and i love them so, so fucking much.

On a very different note, seeing them live has colored my whole, uh, envisioning Dan Howell being trapped in my head in order to cope with my day to day mental isolation, issue, as being like... maybe not the move. so i'm trying to get more used to the quiet of my own head, but hey, over the years, they've helped a lot with that.

I wish i could have met them just to say all these things i'm realizing now, after seeing the show. but TLDR: TIT tysons 2 was the best night of my life. i love them, i love them, i love them, i love them, and i hope they know. i dunno how to move forward with my life after an experience like last night, just, God. i love you dan and phil. i love you phandom. it saved me. TIT saved me.

[burningcheese-merchant]

I have. A few things to say! First of all, thank you for writing for here (and there, but I do not have an AO3)! I’m very in much love with someone going crazy for another and *mwah* do you do it right and justice! That said, prioritize yourself! Drink water! Eat! Do not burn out, and do not feel pressured to do stuff! I hope that your spark burns for long after this fandom!

Thank you so, so much for your kind words! I know you sent multiple asks, so I'm going to try to respond to the first two in one post, if that's ok! (I'll answer the PitayaFire one separately)

Don't you know that the truest, most profound kind of love is born not beneath the soft, pale light of the full moon, not in the sound of a pair's steps as they dance the night away, not within the warmth and security of a tender embrace, but within the walls of the solitary confinement cell in the "dangerous and violent" housing section of a psych ward? LOL jk. It's really fun writing a lovesick/obsessed person for some reason. I don't have this dynamic for any of my other ships, this is the first time I've opted to explore a darker, more uncomfortable and unstable route/interpretation of a "relationship" and it's honestly been a blast lol. (I DO also ship mutual BurningCheese, but under specific conditions, AKA Burning Spice has a redemption arc and GC falls for him on her own. I just can't justify them being together if he's still evil. So long as he is, the love is one-sided)

I really am grateful for your compliments and encouragement. I've got a super big and important BurningCheese fic in the oven rn, but I do need to actually focus on real life for a bit, so it'll be some time. I'll be posting drabbles on here and a fic or two on AO3 where BS is NOT dangerously insane, just a regular asshole who's down bad lol

You can rest assured that my crazy diamond will continue shining on long after I get tired of these games about talking cookies. I always loved writing, it's my favorite hobby and it's my only way of expressing my creativity since I can't draw to save my life. I actually have a 100% original work I've been tinkering with for a loooong time, but I always wanted that story to be told in comic form, and to do that... I have to learn to draw lol. (And that's... a really big mountain to climb. I want to climb it more than anything, but I don't know if I can. Feels like I keep slipping and falling on my ass every time I try to take and retake the first step on the first rock, you know? Idk how anyone does it, honestly...) In any case, I'm truly grateful for you and everyone else who bothers to look at my work and actually thinks it's good for some reason

Did you see that gacha animation though 👀 The way BS is looking at her 👀 y'all can't tell me he ain't thirsty. Look at that twinkle in his eye. Look at that smile. He wants to tear up more than just those wings, I'm telling you 👀 Shadow Milk is a silly billy, he thinks puppet shows and gaslighting are how you flirt with people. Mystic Flour is probably just like "what. What is this. Who is this man. Why is he handsome. Why do I feel this way. Emotions are futile. Love is ephemeral. I will not stray from the path. I will trap him in my mind prison and torture him. That will fix it. He will surrender to apathy. He will return my soul jam. He will see how smart and correct I am. Cloud Haetae will sing my praises to him until he believes them. Yes. That is what will happen. Victory is mine. I am Very Normal about this." Burning Spice? Down horrendous. Down crazy. When GC is there, it's like no one else is in the room. Won't stop smiling. Only mentions the Soul Jam once, focuses on her specifically the whole rest of the time. First real thing he says to her is how much she impresses him. Throws a tantrum after their fight essentially because she didn't step on him hard enough. Down bad. Down bad. Down bad. Ain't no way he isn't. You can't change my mind

Sorry for rambling. TL;DR: Yo Socrates, it's a fucking cookie (also thank you for your support)

[stevenssticks]

Walk with me yall.....

Virgin Dave Mustaine *Feral Screaming*

Baby so horny and desperate barely holding himself back from pouncing in his First lover when they decide to get sticky with It as reader thought that mutual masturbation/sucking him off for the First time and letting him put in Just the tip would be enough to help him cool down but boy oh boy, Dave couldn't wait to get to feel what's like to fuck a real pussy after beating his cock so many times with those porn magazines thinking about his sweetheart so he begs and pleads to his Darling

Him being a nasty, perverted dirty talker naturally, all eager to shove himself as deep as he Can even If It makes him feel overwhelmed and on the verge of crying because no matter How much his sensible Dick Hurts, he loves How warm and wet it feels around him, and when he notices the little bulge whenever he slid in and her juices running down her thighs, making a mess where their bodies connected, she Can almost see his eyes Rolling back as he shivers and trembles while Cumming harder than he ever had before letting out noises that she never expected to see a Man doing

Poor reader, she is in for a long First night because no matter How many times he seems to cum, he Just can't get enough of the feeling

(THE FREAKIN AUH AUH NOISES U ALWAYS TALK ABOUT KEEP HAUTING ME IN MY DREAMS GRRRR)

HOLY FUCK IM WALKING WITH YOU. I AM MOST DEFINITELY WALKING WITH YOU WHAT THE FUCK. i might have to turn this into a full one shot bc mmmghhnmmmmmmmmmmm this is making me feel so many things.

for one: giving him his first blow job would be out of this world. he loves loves loves your mouth. wants to cum in it, fuck it. and he does just that. he’d beg you for it, asking “please please please can i fuck your throat? want it so bad. mouth feels so good.!” and ofc you pull off him for a sec to hesitantly say okay, and as soon as your mouth is back on him he’s grabbing your hair and fucking deep in your throat, letting out a wail bc bby boy is so overwhelmed at the feeling of your warm mouth. he’s cumming down your throat so fast and he’s so embarrassed about it he gets all blushy and shy<<333

OH OH AND giving him a pussy job and just rubbing your cunt over his dick but not actually putting it in. him whining and begging and rutting into you like he’s in heat asking “please. just the tip. i’ll be good i swear. please??” and you ofc cannot say no to a face like that and pleads like those. he gets you on your back and as soon as he presses the tip in he’s GONE. his eyes flutter close and his mouth drops open and he can’t even get a noise out with how good it feels. he’s gotten his taste, and now he wants more. he starts begging again and oh you’re giving in too. it feels so good to have him inside you already. you breathe out a little, punched out noise of approval and he’s slamming into you.

he’s so fucking horny and has been lusting for you since the day he met you and now it’s happening and he’s so overwhelmed with the feeling of it all. he literally would wrap his arms around you in a bear hug and start humping into you bc he doesn’t even wanna pull out at all. he’d be whining and moaning in ur ear telling you “feel so good. your pussy feels so good. fuck, i’m gonna cum inside you. needa cum in you. fuck fuck fuck” and you’re just holding him trying to ground yourself as he ruts into you.

the poor boy damn near howls when he cums, and even after that he can’t stop. he looks between your legs to where you’re connected to see a ring of his and your cum at the base of his dick and he’s already hard again. he’s so fucked out and overstimulated and it fucking hurts, but he’s still flipping you into every position he can and he doesn’t. stop. cumming. at one point he even crawls up the bed to lean over your face and have your throat again and you can taste his cum and yours on your lips and it’s so heady. he’d be so obsessed with getting you all messy and seeing spit run down your chin and hearing you choke on him. him letting out little “thank you”’s in between moans<3333

—

yeah… i’m gonna need to make this into a full story. keep an eye out for that and anon whoever you are BLESS YOUR SOUL.

[darlingpwease]

My future wife

Can have some more Yandere omega Shen Jiu

hih souffle~!!!<33333 I have three things with shen jiu because he is one of those characters that are hard for me, so now I'm trying to work only on him to finally let go,,,, but I have a few little things about him as an yandere omega,,,,,,

puppy and cat

♡ unhealthy behaviour (manipulation, obsessiveness, possessiveness, mutual dependency, isolation), animalistic behaviour, power imbalance -> power exchange, omegaarchy world implied

♡ sex during mating season ('heat), heavy petting, dubious consent (?), aggressive sex implied, breeding implied; mean-ish dom!reader with brat!shen jiu

ωα SHEN JIU can't stand the smell of omegas. The stronger and brighter the smell, the more disgusted he feels, to the point that he does not tolerate a significant part of the omeganine incense and cannot relax if they are in the room, which is a problem because they are quite common, especially in places that are popular as "places for fleeting meetings" and where incense with scents resembling the scent of omega is used to suppress the smells of alphas after sex.

The soft and light smells of alphas, on the other hand, significantly calm him down, giving him a feeling of peace and serenity, especially when he is held close at the same time (even if, because of his pride, he will never ask for it and will not allow himself to be treated like this without a fight) or rocked in arms. Although he is already the head of the peak, he has not grown so much from the image of an anxious and aggressive puppy who never expects anything good from world, and easily gets into a corner as soon as person try to do something with him — but his personality is more like a wild and angry cat.

... SHEN JIU himself does not know why he developed an attachment to you, but something, something in the way you smelled softly, tried to get his attention and behaved with others and with him attracted him. Not as an 'alpha', of course, — he's not desperate enough to rush at the first puppy that tries to get to him, not realizing that their short paws can't get to him sitting on the closet, — but for some reason he calmly reacts when you allow yourself a little more than others, although you immediately pacify yourself if he takes a strict look.

It's very comfortable and cozy next to you, especially when he sees your face next to him and can't help but pinch your cheeks a couple of times, — out of pure interest! — hiding a short smile behind a fan, hearing your almost dissatisfied purring. Don't really like it when he do that to you, hm? What a wild disobedient puppy. Shouldn't you let your shizun do what he wants, since he's the head of the peak and your teacher?

He's not soft, okay? He is still the same insufferable, arrogant omega, the head of the Qing Jing peak and an 'incredible bitch' against whom it is impossible to do anything, because his incredible is as significant as his patience is short. Just maybe his... parental instincts have become a little stronger, especially when he suddenly starts scenting you, leaving scent, which then voluntarily and involuntarily pass on to others, and at the peak it becomes easier to breathe. SHEN JIU does not like to touch others, — only the chosen ones and in a certain mood, — but he is fine with the fact that you cling to him when forget yourself or rub against you, completely blocking your scent with his when you reappear, as if sensing that he needs your presence to distract from thoughts.

... He is prone to drama — sometimes — but with you he really feels like the center of the world, especially when you respectfully pronounce 'shizun', stepping towards him with noiseless confident steps — after all, it is silence and serenity that is taught at the peak, where there is not even a normal right to personal integrity and the ability to make noise everywhere except for fenced areas like training grounds — and he calmly nods, accepting your presence, and points to a place nearby without words.

Even if it's nothing more than an ordinary walk, it's always better with you.

You're the best in the world, shizun.

... SHEN JIU himself does not know when he suddenly became so attached to you and to your words.

Perhaps he himself is no smarter than a dumb puppy, since lets your paws play with his tail, although he could just scratch you.

ωα It's not normal — he knows it's not normal — when you become his lifeline, keeping from becoming even worse, completely falling into self-hatred for himself and the world, no longer controlling either envy or aggression, trying to destroy everything around and finding solace in the destruction. SHEN JIU is tough, prickly, does not know how to love or have compassion, but for some reason you still try to climb up to him and keep him company, even if he does not allow you time after time — but also does not let you escape, leaving you in limbo, where you can only continue trying to climb and see what what will these attempts lead to, without immediately noticing either his all-absorption, his possessiveness, his jealousy — until one day he orders that you stop returning to the shared bedroom and live with him.

... At that moment, you really could not know what it would lead to, but everything was obvious to him. You want to be around and help so much, so why doesn't he go to the meeting? You've been clinging to him for so long and looking for his company — not that he has any reason to refuse you, right? You are so desperate and needy and looking for his attention — that's what you want, isn't it?

... He is like a peacock who spreads tail in an attempt to 'seduce' someone who has already seduced him without even suspecting — and when you almost never leave his side except for sleeping time, you can't even remember the last time you didn't smell him. It seems to you that you don't even have your own smell anymore, even though you are an alpha — even if not so aggressive or intrusive, but an alpha!... But there's still not much you can do, especially when he looks at you with green eyes again, letting you know that if you dare to complain, you'll only get an even stronger blow in return — and if you dare to try to act even against the advice, then he can turn to the whip, if that's what you are so thirsty.

SHEN JIU doesn't even understand what's wrong until someone pays attention to the fact that you, for a moment, are alpha and omega, and it's natural that you have 'feelings' for omegas and you're embarrassed to be around omega, especially unmarried ones, — but if he catches you experience it, he's more likely to use for his own purposes, preferring attack to defense, openly declaring about the ban on going to brothels, and you do not want to know the consequences of violating his words if he smells a vile stench from you.

You live next to him, so behave accordingly.

(if he finds out one day that you slept with another omega, especially with someone like the beast, then he will behave deliberately disgusted and ridiculing for a very long time, unable to convey his feelings in a healthy way, but constantly shaming you for allowing this to happen and mockingly clarifying the details, intentionally provoking you, unable to express their feelings except to bring you to emotions, while burning with intense jealousy and possessiveness, realizing that his alpha, his precious alpha, dared to look at this way, and that they dared to pluck his precious flower.)

In the end, you are more likely to be the one who will take this step and 'attack' him — SHEN JIU knows how to provoke people, especially alphas like you, and will take advantage of this, forcing you to first succumb to the impulse and then also feel guilty for it, taking care that you 'take responsibility' and will never left him after what you did to him, 'succumbing to your base instincts', even if you know that he was no less delighted and his fragrance completely filled the bamboo house. But you have nothing to say when you are on knees in front of him except to agree, more than realizing that it was a trap that you fell into even knowing about it, — although you cannot deny that the sight of his body, littered with your marks and bites, and especially the way you see that it is hard for him to perform certain actions and moving for a few more days, having the first experience with a wild alpha being emotional because of him, definitely had consequences for his body, gives you almost sadistic pleasure.

ωα Just like his appearance when SHEN JIU, your elegant and cold shizun, lies in nest, with trembling sticky thighs and beautiful wet eyes, breathing heavily and whining, experiencing painful cramps inside due to emptiness with the strong smell of alpha nearby — but you continue to tease him, knowing that he can't do anything do it to you when he is at the peak of heat and is ready for anything if only you would go on, almost shamelessly begging you for everything you ask.

After all, peak is taught to keep a calm and cool head at all times — although you are sure that you can keep yourself around just because you are not a 'typical alpha' — but you can think of something if he begs for your puppies. Not that he's above it, right?

His protests and pathetic attempts to growl to look imperious sound so stupid when you feel how excited and needy SHEN JIU is, with those pathetically wet thighs and swollen sensitive scarlet nipples, writhing when you teasingly move away, unexpectedly aggressively growling that if you leave then after estrus he will whip you — but you doubt very much that he is in in a state to threaten you, especially when you press his face into the pillow, biting.

Maybe he is usually in a position of power — but you are so lucky that he is such a good omega, whose heats is long and strong.

[fakeusernamelol]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I DIDN'T EVEN THINK OF THE IMPLICATIONS BEHIND FORD BEING THE ONLY SON??? Ough... Sexism as a narrative device... <3 YOU'RE SO RIGHT Ford's massive ego. The higher he is the farther he'll fall.

And the HERO WORSHIP Stanley providing him the best he can even with all of Ford's fuckups. That one sexually charged page in journal 3 about Stanley being better than Ford in every way and being Ford's hero and the kindest individual he's ever known except make it 40 years early. I'm obsessed.

And "Ford stopped being a safe space for Stan"??? I'M SCREAMING I'M CRYING I'M THROWING UP. STAN ISN'T A SINGLE FATHER OF 2 HES A SINGLE FATHER OF 3 AND FORD IS ONE OF THEM. FORD JUST CAN'T HANDLE CO-OPERATION AND MUTUAL TRUST AND TEAMWORK HE EITHER NEEDS TO BE IN FULL CONTROL OR HAVE SOMEONE ELSE TELL HIM WHAT TO DO. STANLEY PROBABLY ISN'T MUCH BETTER BUT I'M CHEWING ON FORD RN

(also just thinking abt kidnapper Ford and bad ending Ford meeting at the same age. Bad ending Ford is disgusted like 'What Do You MEAN Stan takes care of you aren't you a man???')

And Ford slowly trying to worm his way back on top after doing nothing but raping and then kidnapping a pregnant teenager and then almost killing said teenager??? The Audacity???? That slimey motherfucker????? I know he's still in his 'Icarus didn't flap hard enough' phase and I can definitely see it but every bone in my body wants to tell Stanley to RUN

AND STANLEY!!!!!! This is so much different than bad ending because in bad ending Stanley had no power to begin with but Here??? Stanley could walk up to any police officer and tell them Ford's real name and Ford would be in prison for the rest of his life. Stanley could take his kids, put them in his car and drive and he'd still have enough money from those heists in their late teens to live off of comfortably with the kids and Ford wouldn't be able to look for them without risking being caught. Stanley isn't trapped in this situation at all and he's also been on the streets for years at that point and has a lot of his street smarts he has in canon. Ford is in his life because Stan grabbed him by the ear and dragged him along and it's gotta drive Ford up the walls. And Stan doesn't trust Ford for shit, and Ford doesn't pay the bills or help much with the kids, so Ford is like a pet to him. Sometimes some manipulation Ford said will start getting to Stan like 'Oh Ford's right maybe I have gotten a bit fat...' but then Stan remembers he gets to be fat because he makes the food money and Ford is his bitch. I need them to divorce but also it's more likely one beats the other to death. If Bill shows up in this Ford is even more involved with him because Bill said he'd help get Ford his power back in the relationship but instead Stan made him sleep on the couch with a tinfoil hat :(

- 🫎

HAPPY TO FINALLY HAVE THE WAY TO IDENTIFY YOU, NOW HEAR ME 🫎 BECAUSE YOU AND ME ARE HAVING A LOT TO TALK ABOUT THIS

I'm glad you put the bad ending au on the table because between that one and this au there's a good way of comparisons to do, after all they both follow the same line: Stanford forced Stanley to have his babies and stay with him. Except that here is in a case where life was more with Stanley's side this time lol

I didn't go into it too much but even if Stanley is out of the closet he is still treated in a derogatory manner by the people around him thanks to the sexist thoughts of the time. Ford still thought of him as a destined stay-at-home husband, he would still be going to marry at such a young age for getting pregnant to please both his parents and Carla's and as I said before nobody cared what he really wanted, everyone took him for granted as a future father no matter his age or his dreams. """Luckily""" Ford help him avoiding some of it so he can follow his sick ideas but Stanley's opinion still didn't matter, But unlike the bad ending au, Stan wasn't that easy to control as much as Ford believe it. He collected learnings from his adventure fleeing all over the country along with Ford and as time passed he was seeing how much his brother was doing to just make things worse, ya know what? Fuck him, he was Stanley Pines: the New Jersey's badass, the great conman and a boxing promise, an smart-street man who has lost to much in change of nothing, Stanford could be way smart than him in so much things (and we don't gonna lie Stan's self-esteem was still pretty low for let Ford do all that things to him) but he was the one who threw the punches, the protector, the one who must be sure of them both to be safe and he must do the only thing he was worth for in his life.

I think of Stan's feelings about Ford as a bit of a Stockholm syndrome? I mean, Stanley wasn't crazy enough to admire and allow Ford to continue taking control over him, but he did still see him as superior no matter what he had done to him, Ford still had a future to pursue, he was not a complete failure in life unlike him and even though his trust was broken Stan continued to take care of him because his mind did not allow him to do the right thing and get revenge for everything he had done to him and let him rot in prison, Stan didn't want that to him. he didn't want Ford to be that near him, he didn't want to accept his kisses or feel his hands around him but he doesn't wanted to lost him anyway.

Ford was a little nuisance who was always in Stan's side, he wanted to ignore him but sometimes it was impossible to. sure, it didn't have as much power over him as it once had but it was still able to make Stan question himself even if it was just a little bit. (Perhaps ford could try to get Stan's self-esteem even worse to the point of making him think there wouldn't be anyone who would ever want him anymore because he was a failed fat single father of two except Ford and so that way Stan would accept again to ford of being more close to him?)

ABOUT BILL yknow i was thinking about that yesterday, You see i do think he would ended up in Ford's life but how much of influence he could be to that?

Because look, I'm going to use a little bit of the same coin theory here but we can't deny that part of what made Ford so easy for Bill to manipulate it was the state Ford was in repressing that mix of resentment and palpable pain to Stan, meeting someone who was just as charismatic and even called him like Stan used to was a way of bill's to gain Ford's trust even quicker along with giving him the approbation he always wanted.

So, In a world where Stanley's was still in Ford's life i do think would make Harder to Bill get fully into Ford's mind since he was already obsessed with someone being that his twin brother lol. But That could be a double-edged sword because Bill would know what Ford's weak point was and try to get him by directly going into that. Not only he's promising him Infinite knowledge but also having Stan back under his ropes, Making his sweet brother love him and depend fully on him again..

BUT, Bill was missing something: The main target was Stanley Pines (or Forrester as he was known..) not an average person, not someone he could cheat as easy as he could with his twin brother. You see how in Tbob all the people that Bill ever tried to convince for his portal ended up realizing his true intentions and go against him?, In Ford's case it got harder because it really took him long until he saw bill's true face but luckily for him in this au his protector was near him, so Bill's games wouldn't be as effective he at first thought.

Bill wasn't a real threat to Stan, that was Ford by himself...

AND NOW AS AN EXTRA OMG KIDNAPPER FORD AND BAD ENDING FORD MEETING? it would be so funny i imagine something like (tw: mysoginy, transphobia, homophobia and f word, it's bad ending ford who were talking about..)

Bad ending au Ford: you did let [] do WHAT!? What kind of version you even are of me, one who give up on life!?

Kidnapper au Ford: It's not as what you think, Stanley save us but he's still loyal to me!

Bad Ending au Ford: And how, forbidding us to take what is ours and Taking our time off from studying to spend hours taking care of the children she should be taking care of instead of showing off to others!? Don't even make me talk of how you let her continue with that stupid thoughts, no guess you're not a man but some of those faggots..

Kidnapper au Ford: Stan's helping me to pay for college, he's doing it for me! He's still doing what he should do for me, I--Im just letting him be a little comfortable but he's still mine and im still a man, Stan's not in control of me, I am!--

Kidnapper au Stan: STANFORD COME HERE, YOU'RE CHANGING THE KIDS THIS TIME!

Kidnapper au ford: 𝓒𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓶𝔂 𝓭𝓮𝓪𝓻! *🥺🥺*