#if i seem much more verbose it's because i needed to write this on my laptop which makes typing and more importantly yapping even *easier*

[shalom-iamcominghome]

I've been doing a lot of reflection as of late, especially after this past class.

This past class was about the Torah and Tanakh in general, and the way the rabbi talked about the commandments (specifically the ten commandments) has made me really reflect on how I interpret them, specifically the fifth commandment, or honoring your mother and father.

This is a commandment I have wrestled with for a long time - in fact, it brought me away from g-d at multiple times. I was severely abused when I was incredibly young by my mother, and I used to feel insulted at the implication that I were to honor her while she got to live a better life. It was hypocritical, in my eyes.

But this rabbi surmised that this particular commandment was because parenthood is an act of creation, something that is like the g-d from which we come from. My realization is this: I don't think we're necessarily meant to take even these commandments literally.

I this particular commandment is more of a call to honor creation - creation is a gift, and like any gift, many people simply will not like it and will discard it. The person who abused me created me, but she did not honor creation. She didn't honor me, but I can still honor it.

I have started to honor creation much more. I'm too young, too unstable, not mature enough to be a father (though I fantasize about it), but I create all the time. I create relationships, I create with my hands through crochet. I create memories, I create my world. And I can honor who I am and where I came from that made me who I am. I've been learning one of the mother tongues of my family (Italian, since part of my family originates there) and it was judaism that inspired me to do this.

I don't think g-d wants me to honor my abuser. I think He wants me to remember the Holy action of creation. When I am a father, that act of creation will be Holy, and indeed, I am already joyful about the thought.

I have seen many people struggle with this particular commandment, but I think this perspective helps me personally. I don't think I ever have to forgive my abusers (plural), and I don't think I am commanded to simply because they happened to be family. I am commanded to recognize the holy, to elevate the mundane. In doing so, I will remember g-d. Through creation, I honor g-d and everything he has done for us, for me, and for our collective people.

[courtneedsleep]

this one is dedicated to @rahuratna.

it’s a scene inspired from her Nanami pre/relationship series, specifically chapter 6 paragraph 4: “[He] liked to visit the aquarium on his down time because watching the fish relaxed him. He always ended those aquarium trips by eating a sushi meal set, something you told him was decidedly morbid.”

that chapter, that paragraph, that line always seemed to stick with me. literally the BEST Nanami Kento x reader series I have ever read. Not only because Rahu writes Nanami, so deliciously Nanami-coded, but also because she writes the reader as someone who is independent and emotionally intelligent and supportive. (i think it shows a lot about who she is as a person too!)

perfect segway into Rahu appreciation paragraph, oh my goodness. you ask and she answers your calling. so i took advantage of this by bombarding her inbox with random, lengthy character analysis shenanigans. so not only does she take the time to listen to my verbose thoughts, but she is also insightful and elaborates off of them with that beautiful, critical-thinking brain of hers. there’s also the crackfics that brightens up my day with much needed laughter, the schmutt that is to drool over, and the very handy dandy life advice that resonates so hard for me. it just goes to show how multi-talented and thoughtful and kind she is.

—————//—————

Hi Rahu! I have to confess that I’ve been wanting to draw fanart for your fics for a while now. But there was just too many good scenes to choose from. The picnic scene, the fried chicken and beer scene… the shower scene (😗)… And then i read your Nanami-Pom series, and I’m like damn now there’s even more options to choose from. Then you posted the hotpot crackfic and made it all the more difficult. *sigh.*

I do not know how to draw backgrounds aquatic creatures or furniture, so uhh, excuse the attempts to “fake it till you make it” 😂. I hope you like it tho, you’re honestly more than amazing but my vocabulary isn’t big enough nor will i be looking at a thesaurus because I have to wake up in 5 hours and 45 min.

🥹🥹🥹💜💕,

court

[weenwrites]

*Crawls out of the sewers to make a request*

Yoo! Hope you're having a good day, make sure to drink lots of water!

As for the request, would do you mind doing a romance pining headcanons Transformers Prime Bumbleee and Optimus Prime (separately, of course) for a human charge? The bots would develop a crush on the reader, and how would they're pining be-? Most of their time pining, he human charge would be oblivious to their advances (if there are any) and would just brush it off as them being friendly? Despote the human charge having mutual feelings for the bot as well.

Apologies for my bad english, and I'm not really good at describing stuff, so pardon if it seemed weird or something-

Anyways, thank you for your time!

A/N: Your english is great! I think you were able to communicate your idea just fine.

[ Please do not repost, plagiarize, or use my writing for AI! Translating my work with proper credit is acceptable, but please ask first! ]

Optimus

It's not that he's afraid of expressing his true feelings to you, it's that he's hesitant on whether he should. You already have such a massive target painted on your back just by being under his watch, to start dating you would raise the stakes higher than you'd ever know. Of course that isn't to mention whether he'd have the time and energy to be your partner.

Yes, he sees you every day because you're his charge, but if you were to make your relationship romantic, he would need to be present and available in your life outside of decepticon-related issues. He is uncertain whether he has the time to, though he understands that he has a capable team who are well willing to break their own backs just to give him some time off, he doesn't want them to go to such lengths.

So while there's no verbal confession right away, or for any time soon, he's much more talkative with you and attentive to your every need—not overly so, but enough that it's noticeable. And however you spend patrols with him—whether it be listening to music as you drive, or just sitting in silence—words are what fill the silence as you meander down the road.

At times he'd dream about life with you, and in those dreams the war is the least of his concerns. In those dreams he thinks about how he could make his schedule align with yours, he thinks about how you might enjoy this one activity, or this one place on Cybertron. And at times he finds bits of his dreams even seeping into his waking thoughts as he finds himself wondering about your well-being on a day you're elsewhere.

Bumblebee

Surprisingly it's rather difficult to tell that he likes you because he's already so friendly towards you, but it's not inherently impossible if you can read the signs. Firstly, he's a lot more expressive around you—and while that may be surprising to hear given the fact he's already a very expressive person, I mean "more expressive" as in he seems even more enthusiastic and happy around you (even more than either of you knew was possible).

You can see it in the way he tries to keep you around, and the way that he admires stares at you for a bit longer than is considered acceptable by your societal norms. Especially whenever you go out on patrol with him, it almost feels like the seat belt around you is hugging you in a way, but you could also pass that off as he's just trying to make sure you're nice and secure.

His confession is very shy, yet there's something so endearing when it comes to seeing him offer you a hand-made Valentine's day card. The cover of the card is simple, yet the inside is what really stands out to you the most. The inside details his feelings for you—not in any showy or verbose way, but in a few straightforward and simple sentences. Yet each word is teeming with his unexpressed adoration for you, and his hesitance barely conceals the fear of your rejection, and yet he's still brave enough to look at you as if to ask "well, what do you say?"

[lavampira]

book recommendations

tysm @winedark and @rosenfey for the tag <:

passing it along to @hythlodaes @scionshtola @coldshrugs @likeabirdinflight @lesbianalicent @veeples @narrativefoiltrope @kirnet @disequilibria @jennystahl @elvves @queenofthieves @weird-ecologies @erielake @verbose-vespertine @solarisrenbeth @onceinabluemoony @queerbrujas @oldblood but ofc no pressure!!

1. the last book I read:

GOTH WESTERN by LIVALI WYLE — well. technically, it’s an indie graphic novel. but it’s a western meets magical realism about necromancy, revenge, and the power of love. and lesbians. I burned through it in a couple hours sitting because I was so gripped by it tbh.

2. a book I recommend:

THE HACIENDA by ISABEL CAÑAS — an absolute all time fave book in my heart; I would say one doesn’t even need to necessarily love horror to get invested in this one, since it also involves very interesting critique of spanish colonialism, religion, and class struggles in post-independence mexico only using hauntings as the lens to view it.

3. a book that I couldn’t put down:

THE PRIORY OF THE ORANGE TREE by SAMANTHA SHANNON — I was glued to this book for a solid two weeks despite its length. I have a lot that I would change about the pacing and certain events or qualities of some characters’ outcomes, but it was such a fun fantasy read, and I had a difficult time even moving on from the setting and protagonists once I was done.

4. a book I’ve read twice (or more):

THE SONG OF ACHILLES by MADELINE MILLER — my first time reading this myth retelling was my freshman year of college, so I reread it again ten years later to see if it would still hold up for how much I loved it, and it absolutely did. the perspective of the man standing beside and in love with the hero interwoven with the tragedy of achilles and patroclus takes me right out and the passages that tumblr enjoys to quote from it have so much more impact in the full context of the narrative.

5. a book on my TBR:

OUR WIVES UNDER THE SEA by JULIA ARMFIELD — this poor book keeps getting knocked down on my TBR but I’m determined to read it this year. I’m intrigued by the horror of the protagonist’s wife ‘coming back wrong’ in a sense, and the recommendations based on its similarity to ANNIHILATION, but also the fact it seems to be a wlw scifi horror, too.

6. a book I’ve put down:

AFFINITY by SARAH WATERS — I wanted to like this one so bad, considering how often waters has been hyped up to me as The Author for historical lesbian novels and the fact it delves into victorian spiritualism, but the pacing felt so slow at getting to the point in the plot, and when it finally did, the twist put me off on finishing the end. it’s probably more of a case of ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ but I def had to DNF it.

7. a book on my wishlist:

GHOST STATION by S.A. BARNES — space horror quickly became a fave niche genre that I got into last year, so I’ve been very excited for this release, too. I’m also a fan of how barnes writes atmospheric dread and I have high expectations for it.

8. a favorite book from my childhood:

WUTHERING HEIGHTS by EMILY BRONTË — it altered my brain chemistry as a teenager in high school and I haven’t been the same since I read it. I distinctly remember listening to ‘you said I killed you — haunt me then!’ read aloud and having to pretend like it didn’t make me feel so completely unhinged in the middle of class.

9. a book you would give to a friend:

PIRANESI by SUSANNA CLARKE — I was recommended this one by a friend to begin with, so it feels like an even more perfect book to pass forward. I think it’s one of those books that’s easy to get absorbed into even if it’s not a typical genre one would read, and it’s such a life-altering experience to go through with the protagonist, too. the underlying message that we’re all changed by our own trials and we’re never the same as we were before lingers with me.

10. a book of poetry or lyrics you own:

CRUSH by RICHARD SIKEN — it’s taken me so long to finally track down a physical copy at my bookstore but it was worth it because it remains my fave book of poetry to date. I could quote so many lines, after how hard they’ve hit me, and some of them have influenced my own writing or pairings in some ways.

11. a nonfiction book you own:

HAVANA NOCTURNE by T.J. ENGLISH — back in 2015-2016ish I went through a true crime phase in the prohibition era through the foundation of the US mafia, and this is a very informative book on how the mob became tied to cuba and how the revolution affected it.

12. what are you currently reading:

AN EDUCATION IN MALICE by S.T. GIBSON — I stumbled across this retelling of carmilla set in a late 60s massachusetts women’s college after reading gibson’s A DOWRY OF BLOOD and had to give it a try. I’m enjoying it so far; the prose is full of thick emotional yearning and electric chemistry, and the balance in the narrative of toxic mentorship, historical romantic and sensual attraction between women without shaming them for it, and vampiric elements is really fun.

13. what are you planning on reading next:

WHAT FEASTS AT NIGHT by T. KINGFISHER — I only found out the other day that the sequel to WHAT MOVES THE DEAD was even released but I’m so desperate for the next part of alex easton’s story (and how eerily kingfisher writes horror) that it shot up to my next read.

[satanicspinosaurus]

Seconds

Tags: Bloodweave, Gale’s cooking, blood, cow’s blood, gift giving, fluff, getting together, after a break up, basically two hungry and scared people trying to figure out the world, Gale’s POV, so enjoy all his insecurities, and some verbose writing choices that are intentional, Astarion snark, kissing, ear touching, frankly you can read half of this as a metaphor for sex, author can’t stop you, author thinks it would be a mistake though 

Length: 2k

Rating: Teen

Read on A03: here.

Summary: Gale and Astarion had struck up a friendship after a failed night of romance. Now, with the Netherbrain fight around the corner, Gale finds his heart still aches to give Astarion any scrap of happiness he can offer. This is a story about a man made of failures and hunger, trying to be a good friend. It begins with a steak. And ends with this most delicious second course.

With thanks: To my dear friend @lumienyx, who is frankly encouraging my bullshit at an alarming rate. And to the lovely @tragedybunny who hunted down the typos and errors on this like Tara feasting on pigeons. 

•・・・◉・・・•

Gale rummaged through the spice cabinet of the Inn. He was pleased to see that the cook, who had allowed him to slip her a few gold coins for access and privacy, had managed to craft a solid selection. The sprig rosemary seemed a touch too on the nose, so he grabbed a little bundle of thyme instead- striping it into the butter as the filet sizzled in the cast iron skillet.

It was a delicate process, mainly because he was aiming for as close to rare as humanly possible to achieve. It didn’t give him much time to develop a proper crust, but as Gale spooned the butter back onto the filet, he also pulled from the Weave. Perhaps he asked more than normally would be needed for a simple cantrip. But he needed to infuse all the wonderful things Astarion deserved to taste in it. 

Astarion meandered in a few moments later, when Gale had plated it and was intensely overseeing the food resting as if he could personally will it to perfection. 

The vampire gave a sharp tut after observing the scene, perhaps annoyed his entrance hadn’t been noted. 

“When you said you had a surprise for me to try, darling, I assumed it would be something that would make me interested in swallowing,” the vampire finally said to announce his presence.  

Gale looked up brightly at where the playful swatting came from, a warm smile breaking onto his face. He laid the best knife and fork he could find near the plate and pushed it forward.  

“Ah, trust me my dear friend,” Gale encouraged. “I do believe I have made some acceptable advances since the last time you tried my cooking.” 

That had been back when Astarion was still trying to hide what, and more importantly, who he was. Perhaps it had helped in the long run though. It had taught Gale that Astarion could put a wide variety of things in his mouth and pretend to love it. Later, after sampling a decent red Astarion claimed to be vinegar, Gale had come to the quick conclusion that vampirism negatively affected the culinary practice of taste. 

The idea was tantalizing to him. In part because no bestiary had even half the details he could observe in a single evening around Astarion. But he also hoped to reach past the honeyed words for the real truth. 

He was curious, in particular, about why Astartion still attempted to drink wine. It said something about appetite that felt vaguely nostalgic to Gale. 

But then Tav, who had uncritically eaten up Astarion’s sweet smiles and words at the party, eagerly indulged in their place of origin first. Gale didn't feel hurt that Astarion preferred someone else's straightforward affection over his own questions. The tadpoles had made their timelines risky and fortune favored the bold. 

It was a short thing, in the end though. After one encounter, Tav ultimately found her heart lay more with Karlach’s wholesome sweetness. It was better fit for her than wrestling with the delicate halflies that laid nestled to hide half-truths in Astarion’s heart. If it had hurt him, the vampire hadn’t let on, going back to mulling around the camp with hungry eyes and talking of desires. 

And once again, Gale was left turning over the dozens of little curious details about appetite Astarion occasionally dropped; trying to lay them out and find the bigger picture. Gale had been too confident of his ability to uncover that truth once again. Astarion’s sudden thrust backing onto the dating scene hadn’t struck him as quite so desperate, but a beautiful mystery he alone could solve.

He was grateful his hubris had at least allowed him the chance of friendship with Astarion. Rather than once again stripping him of everything when he inevitably failed. No, he savored the friendship he was allowed. Even if, quietly, his heart still wanted to give Astarion all the beauty his mind could dream of and his hands could weave. 

The food was a meager offering, really, but the wizard was happy to see Astarion shrug and sit down to try it. 

Maybe it wasn’t everything Gale had dreamed of in his books to see a bit of excitement build on the man’s face when he delicately sniffed his offering. He was not worthy of giving a thousand days and nights of little pleasures to anyone, it would seem. But, oh, if his heart didn’t flutter a bit at how Astarion’s eyes widened slightly when he gracefully cut into the steak and a weave-enhanced aroma wafted up. 

Gale had truly grown to enjoy his time spent in friendship with the pale elf. He was a stellar, if not acerbic, conversationalist. And the only other person at camp that enjoyed books beyond bawdy romances. Astarion was a person Gale could imagine being around every day for decades without it ever becoming boring. Well, assuming Gale wouldn’t be left alone because the vampire wandered off to find more interesting company than a stuffy wizard. 

At least for now, sometimes he’d say something clever and elicit a sharp grin. Or he’d make a genuine offer to want to properly introduce Astarion to Tara once this was all over, and something soft would grow on the man’s face before he schooled it away. Hells, even walking around Baldur’s Gate and just commenting on architecture with him made Gale desperate to show Astarion Waterdeep.  

It was clear his dear friend had a taste for the finer things in life, but had been left starved. Gale wanted to lay out a banquet for him, to hear his commentary and innovate until he found satisfaction. It was a beautiful thought for the future, but that was a thing still being written. 

Gale needed to try and take that joy and give it in lump sum, lest the worst happened tomorrow. There were notes in his pack on leads Astarion could begin searching down for help finding a place in the sunlight, that he’d entrust to a messenger soon. A desperate letter to his mother, hoping she would extend the clan’s aid to his dear friend. A few letters of introduction that Gale prayed would be enough to get Astarion a chance to observe rare books at Candlekeep if he so needed.  

In the meantime, Gale had but this moment. Watching Astarion primly take a bite of the filet and chew as if he was a bit out of practice. 

This wasn’t the first time Gale had cooked something special for someone - he had a sophomoric idea of what facial expressions to expect. Like always, Astarion didn’t disappoint though with novelty. There was a strange look on his face; emotions roiling so intensely nothing had a beginning nor end. 

“This is shit,” Astarion eventually hissed. 

Gale offered up open palms, apologetic shoulders, and the broken in, embarrassed smile of a man so used to his reach exceeding his grasp in anything that truly mattered. 

“I’m sorry,” he began. “You don’t have to finish it–” 

Astarion looked him dead in the eye. When he had Gale's full attention, he stabbed the piece of meat like it had been carved from Cazador himself. He brought it to his mouth and bit down. Hard. Hard enough Gale could hear the cutlery screech in protest. 

Astarion was a messy eater- a man of singularly devouring hunger. The blood from the filet trickled down his chin, to his chest, marking him temporarily like Gale’s own source of perverse appetite.

Gale watched him swallow and ruminate. 

“This tastes like goodbye,” the man drawled, eyes pinning Gale to his spot. “I don’t like it.” 

Gale smiled, trying to ignore the first thing and address only the second. 

“Well, sometimes experiments don’t always work out,” he began to affably ramble. “I did believe that a few uses of prestidigitation would help overcome your normally exclusively sanguine diet, but I would still appreciate if you could offer some notes-” 

While Gale had been prattling about cantrips, Astarion had decided to switch from rumination to predation. He had gotten up, head refusing to move as he stalked towards Gale like a cat fixated on a songbird. The vampire pounced, slamming the wizard into the cabinets. All it took was a bold hand wrenching one wrist up above his head and a tongue thrust into his mouth to strip him of his power, his self-image as Gale of Waterdeep. 

Astarion devoured Gale Dekarios’ mouth, eating up the moans his actions elicited.  

After a second or eternity, the poor man wasn’t sure which, Astarion broke away to let Gale pant. 

“I want seconds,” Astarion commanded, his other hand running down a thigh- barely keeping to a space that wouldn’t be scandalous if someone walked in. 

Gale tried to master his fluttering heart, to let it accept air and nourishment so it would stop screaming in his chest almost loud enough that it drowned out the orb. 

“You don’t,” he gasped, licking his lips before trying again. “You said you don’t do seconds.” 

That was one of the first, sharp pieces of truth Astarion had flung at him, after their night of gentle love making had cracked through a mask made to suffer only harsh blows. 

People don’t use me twice, he had lilted in the morning. After he had time to lick the wounds Gale’s gentle praise had inflicted and compose himself back to untouchable beauty. Go find someone you can wake up with a thousand times. 

That was back when Astarion wasn’t sure if he would be free, but Gale was still hopeful a solution was available for his own woes. Now things had changed. 

Gale felt the grip on his wrist tighten. Nails that bit into his skin, fearful that without the contact there would be nothing. It was the touch of a man who had rejected the stolen pleasures of ascending, and now wished to ground himself in freely offered affections. 

“I didn’t want you to die,” Astarion offered quietly as his body screamed in accordance. “But I am realizing now that not dying is second to living.” 

Gale wanted to soothe away the worry on the man's face. To cradle the pressed brow gently and let it entrust all its worries to him. But Astarion held him firm. No matter - Gale always had a clever tongue.

"With the number of threats our group has managed to vanquish in the last tenday alone, I think our odds are very good at succeeding, Astarion."

Astarion laughed, letting go of Gale’s wrist to poke at the site where the orb marked him. “I know this is your back-up plan, Gale. Maybe you’ll blow yourself up if we struggle too much against the Netherbain. Maybe you’ll let Mystra own you to remove it. Or she’ll use it as a threat to bargain against your interest in the Crown. But I am tired of petty tyrants’ wants and demands.” 

“She’s a Goddess, Astarion, it’s not remotely-” Gale tried to interject. 

Astarion didn’t even dignify that with a verbal response. He simply looked at Gale, eyes flickering from where the orb burned him to his own, violently marked neck. Astarion knew what manufactured pain was, appetites unanswered. It was why they spoke so easily, they shared this perverse second language. 

“You deserve a choice too,” Astarion eventually said. 

The first kiss in the kitchen was Astarion’s - passionate and aggressive to hide the tenderness it came from. The second was Gale’s - slow and soft, an adventure that ended with being more daring by the hearth. They weren’t so different. Both had left a man gasping for more, a hand traveling to places to hint at encores. 

Astarion leaned into the way Gale’s fingers gripped his curls, the pad of his thumb ever so slightly brushing against his ear in a way that would barely be considered scandalous if anyone ever came in. 

“What if I wanted to choose a second Mr. Dekarios?” Gale whispered. 

Astarion had a talent for saying one thing, but meaning another. It was intoxicating to Gale. The way he could roll his eyes and bring up a lip in a perfect sneer that to an onlooker signaled disgust embodied, a hint of fang and claws coming out. But oh, if the man wasn’t still tender to the touch- a gentle weight that was as inviting as his words were barbed. A secret laid out only for him to discover.

“Well, you should probably get better at cooking, darling. I have no clue how you plan to catch any self-respecting man in your current situation.” 

His hungry red eyes glanced down to a plate that was empty. 

“I, for one, have standards,” Astarion said softly. 

Gale was a man of great pride. It was tempting to press back, to needle the vampire. Perhaps to bring a thumb to wipe up the blood that was still shining on his neck and watch the man lick it off before calling him on the falsehood. 

But on second thought, Gale also desperately needed to close his eyes and believe in the magic of being allowed this close again. He leaned his brow to Astarion’s to give a kiss to the naked skin he found. Not to soothe away the way the vampire had his eyebrows furrowed in concern of being seen. But as a promise he loved this too and wanted it just as much as every other part of him. 

“I look forward to learning about every single one, no matter how small or obscure,” he promised. “I will ascribe them upon my heart, and treasure each word as a gift.” 

Astarion looked at him, searching for the lie. Gale was granted the privilege of watching his eyes grow soft with the knowledge that the wizard was as sincere as he was loquacious.

Then, he had the thrill of watching a vampire who had recently declared he wanted to start living realize he was ravenous.

And that Gale was the perfect second course for this evening and many more to come. 

︶꒦꒷❤︎꒷꒦︶

Author Notes: Thank you for reading this! As always, I would like to remind you thirsty folks to hydrate a bit if needed. Although I suppose for this fic, maybe encouraging you to get a snack would be more appropriate! 

Please let me know if you enjoyed the pun in the tags. :P 

Hopefully this is the start of a solid writing month for me. I'm going to be aiming to put out something each Monday.

[beloved-brynn]

*pokes you*

Brynryn, hi hello, how are youuu?

Anyway, since you asked me abt who i ship my mutuals with, i wanna ask you something as well! >:D

What (two or more) characteristics do you personally like about yourself and your mutuals? You can either just say it, explain it, or anything really lol

About myself: I have a love-hate relationship with my grit. Mostly because I know I was born talentless in all aspects (no exaggeration), so every creative endeavor I have is 99% hardwork. And no, my parents don't have writing or drawing skills. I don't need to explain how my mom only knows how to draw "v" birds or how my dad isn't great at English. Absolute shame on them. (jk I love my family, I wish I could just pass my lifespan to hem HAHAHA). So when all hardwork fails, I feel like absolute shit. Second thing probably is my faith. I think I wouldn't be here if I didn't have some level of trust with the universe overall. The rest of me is garbage tho lmao. If I'm an otome game character, I'm 100% the beloved and beloathed trash husbando /srs.

About @leftdestiny-posts: I'm not sure I'd ever encounter an internet mutual like them ever again, and I think their appreciation for life and bluntness/straightforwardness is something to be admired. They're traits I don't have. Shiro and I are very very different people, and I'm not sure why there was a miracle that made us meet lol.

About @a-dose-of-phitre and @estellxli: longest friends I have. I really admire their creativity and skill, and if you want me to be honest, I know full well I'm left behind in those departments. If you know me irl, I'm not exactly the most affectionate person so I'd rather keep this part brief haha. Though, a small addition, I admire estella's communication skills and assertiveness a ton and I wish I had a bit more of Phitre's endearing charm and mannerisms (and height-). I'm super stiff lol.

About @navxry: Probably communication skills as well? When we met, they talked continuously. As much as I know I'm an extrovert and thrive off social energy, I think something in me is holding me back to being as vocal as they are. They also seem to have an abundance of energy. Ahh. Youth. /j

About @mixed-kester: i wish i am surviving engineering as much as she has i wanna quit can i quit also how does she pick colors sht is unfair i always have to open up google chrome to— //hjjjj

About @jessamine-rose: she already knows about my fashion sense or lack thereof, so let's talk about something else. I greatly enjoy her writing style because I know it's not something I'd pull off. Her sentence structures doesn't become verbose, they're incredibly succinct— enough to lead you along. Other than that, probably the way she bounces ideas spontaneously. I wish she sleeps right tho HAHAHA /silly

About @vennnnn-diagram: I probably pestered them too much about how normal people work honestly. I lack social skills so learning about stuff from them makes me feel a bit more knowledgeable without any visible judgement from them. So yeah, add that as one out of two. The second one? Their music skills. I hate learning instruments. I don't know why. I tried plenty. I suck plenty. Everyone in my family are great at playing except me. They're the Bruno Mars to my gambling addiction. WAIT WHY DOES SOUND LIKE THE WORST PICKUP LINE KN EXISTENCE HAHAHAHAHA

About @stardust-for-your-soul: i wish i can write fluff i wish i can write romantic things why can't i think of romantic genshin men headcanons why'd it always have to end in murder— oh and also, I love her prose. Chryseis can turn the mundane to something that oozes with beauty, and I think that romanticism is wonderful.

About @lucienbarkbark: i absolutely do not agree with your love for dazai /silly but I do admire estorea's unapologetic nature. Hell yeah bestie fricking read thag 300000+ chaptered story 😭😭😭 /gen. I find it a challenge to sit down and read nowadays huhu. Also, I like how warm she is to talk to, we haven't DMed much but it feels so hospitable (?) whenever she send fic links. Wish I was more like that. Also, thank you for the oda fics, soldier.

About @meimeimeirin: when mei put the kamisato siblings in a kin tier once (unless memory fails me), i remember silently agreeing so much. She has that "I got most my life together" vibe and I do wish I have that. She's also very open to talking about what she loves, she doesn't hide her affections and it's something I very much look up to if you've seen the things I've written so far lol. I love how vocal she is with appreciating what she has, including some new drinks she tasted, her parents' loving relationship, it's just sweet. The teashop aesthetic definitely suites her vibe. She just seems so... Elegant? Can't be me, I need to cause a mess /silly

About y o u: well first off if I get to have your hands for a day, you'd find weird ass drawings of blonde men on your drawing software. Second, I like your vibes a ton. It hits different. It fluctuates from absolutely chill to saying lowkey out of pocket things and I might be getting gaslit to thinking you're not at all the latter /j

[the-eclectic-wonderer]

When I first read The Hobbit (or, rather, its Italian translation) I was 12. Oddly enough, the copy was lent to me by someone I would grow to really despise (how he could be a fan of Tolkien's works and still harbor so much bigotry in his heart, I'll never know), but I still thank him for that singular act of kindness, because I loved it to bits. And how could I not? I was 12 - still in the prime age for proper adventure, and I was reading one of the best, most exciting adventures ever written.

I have no memory of my second time reading it - I know it must have happened, because I now own a copy in the original English and I must have read it when it was gifted to me, and I know it must have happened in the years around my twentieth birthday, because there is a pencil note in the margins of page 162 explaining the meaning of the word portcullis in the neat handwriting I developed during my first years in university. I'm not someone who normally writes in my books, not even to underline passages, so I can't help but wonder why I decided to note a meaning down - I think perhaps I felt the need to leave a mark, to really make the book my own, to prove to myself I was a real person with a real identity that actually existed and loved a wonderful novel like The Hobbit. Whatever I felt, I'm sure it was a sparkle of light in an otherwise dark time in my life.

I'm writing these verbose notes now, just after finishing my third re-read of The Hobbit, and I'm struck by the differences between this reading and the previous ones - and by how, as incredible as it seems, I loved it more this time around. From the very first word on the very first page I could picture Tolkien himself telling this story to his kids, drinking in their amusement and their wonder; and this feeling, the love that pours out from every single sentence, endeared it to me all the more. There's still a part of me that's excited by the adventure, that drinks in all the tales of bravery and cunning and dreams of blue skies and open plains - but there's also a part now that understands the danger, the suffering, the fear, and loves little brave Bilbo so much more for it. There's a part that understands why Bilbo came back irrevocably changed, that gets why at the end of his adventure he only longs to go back to his hobbit-hole, and why he can love his home and the good food and the comfort and his friends with a different depth after coming back. It's the part of me that read the final line, with Bilbo laughing among friends and passing Gandalf the tobacco-pipe, and closed the book with tears in her eyes and a full, warm heart.

I don't want any children, but if I ever have nephews and nieces, it will be my joyful pleasure to embark on this adventure with them once again, and I hope they'll come to understand why the little tobacco-pipe is the most important part of it, too.

[majorbaby]

20 questions for fic writers

thank you so much for the tag @bornforastorm, i loved reading through yours :3 

i will tag @marley-manson / @rescue-ram / @persianflaw / @leonardcohenofficial / @raywritesthings

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 14… will be 15 in under 24 hrs ;)

2. What's your total Ao3 word count? 136,971… just over 100K of which were published this year :D 

3. What fandoms do you write for? MASH at the moment, with no end in sight. I have two ideas for twin peaks but not much motivation to write them, let alone the discipline. 

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? if you really wanna know here’s my ao3 and you can you sort by kudos, i don’t wanna link my fics in other fandoms that are almost 7 years old now… pls… 

5. Do you respond to comments? i used to be quite diligent about doing it but when i was publishing near-daily for kinktober i fell behind because i was literally writing every day. i may still go back to respond to them because i like doing it. 

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? the beejhawk sex pollen fic (heavy dubcon warning)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? i’m realizing that most of traphawk fics are only ‘happy endings’ if you see them as self-contained, which they aren’t really, because even though trapper’s exit isn’t at all relevant, i’m not consciously ‘unwriting’ that. but in-fic probably Goodbye, Farewell and Amen to That because it explicitly states that TrapHawk can handle whatever is thrown at them, which would include whatever happens post-fic. 

8. Do you get hate on fics? for a while i had an anon who submitted vagues about me / my work so like yes, i’ve read a couple vagues seemed they were about my fic but, and i know this sounds like a cop-out but genuinely, i’m kinda flattered by anyone who hates my fic and still manages to read the whole thing and write a public post about how how they didn’t like it? like, what are we??? 

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? i consider myself primarily a smut writer, only incidentally non-smut writer. i write all kinds and can’t wait to diversify more. 

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? my dream fic is a specific crossover.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? yes

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? not recently, but in former fandoms yes. 

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? sort of. it isn’t published. but maybe soon. 

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? traphawk is the ship to me. some things we should be dramatic about: there’s the traphawk that i write and then there’s the traphawk that i live, which only my irl trapper understands 

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? now that i have discovered the margaret longfic i really want to write i’ve officially abandoned my 80K canon-compliant margaret WIP

16. What are your writing strengths? i’m disciplined, i want to improve, i take risks, i’m curious, i’m honest and i welcome strong challenges from the people who edit my work.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? i have some barriers (i’m dyslexic and english is my not my first language) but i could still stand to be much more diligent about grammar and punctuation. beyond that, my prose tends to be flowery and verbose and need to be reined in a lot. i’m trying to get better at on my own but it helps that my OG beta, marley, is kind of my stylistic foil lol (hope she doesn’t mind me saying), she trims a lot of the fat from my work and helps me communicate my ideas better. lastly, sometimes i suffer from being really married to an idea that sounded cooler in my head than it does on paper, and i have a really hard time setting it down.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i say this as someone who is multilingual - it’s almost never a good idea, especially in fic, if you’re having a main character speak partially in another language for no reason except to note that you, the author, knows that they speak another language. it could maybe make sense for atmosphere, but in that case, just say “they were speaking x language / they said something in x language”. 

i’ll be honest, it annoys me so much that if i see a character in a fic drop a few words in a language other than english and then continue on in english that i will x-out of a fic. there’s got to be some thoughtful in-universe explanation for that e.g. if you’re in Canada, bilingual service agents will say ‘Hello/Bonjour’ to you to indicate that you have an option to speak with them in either language. 

19. First fandom you wrote for? uhhh i honestly don’t remember. i’ve been writing fanfiction since before i was a teenager. first time i published it might’ve been for the legend of zelda. 

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? at the moment it’s cherry bomb! because it was a nice, smutty interlude in traphawk’s relationship and a fic that exists mostly for kink’s sake but still has a distinct vibe, unlike filthysweet which i don’t hate, but imo is unremarkable. CB is 95% style 5% substance and still contains weight somehow. i really hope i can recreate that again. 

[shallowseeker]

SHAL YOU NO LIKE ROBBIE?!

TBH, I don't care as much about the writers. (I know--eternal shame. I'm not even a real fan--kill me now etc.) I just...don't remember things. I always have to remind myself who's doing what. I don't know how half of you keep it all straight AND remember episode titles??? And no, nooooo I like Robbie just fine. Love him, even. He’s in my top choices!!!!

I just consider him something of a specialist, maybe? I'm going off vibes, remember. I feel like Robbie is a long-winded, loveable teddy bear. His writing reminds me of comic books, which could be why it feels so fraught and verbose at times, like it's crammed into a speech bubble...? Idk.

I think a lot of his characters are also a bit...it's hard to put my finger on it, exactly. Wholesome? They're so Loveable (TM) and Dorky (TM). I find it stifling sometimes to stomach all the "pluckiness" at once. It even took me awhile to warm up to his characters in The Winchesters. (Don't hit me! Maybe I just have a bad personality.)

I think you'd want him on your team for sure. He did Goodbye Stranger and other wonderful things like Metatron's speech in Don't Call Me Shurley (which was also belabored at times but greatly helped by Curtis Armstrong)! It's a type of energy I find leaning "too meta," and "too mechanistic" at times. The best example I can think of is There's No Place Like Home. I like it in pieces, but as a whole, it seems a little too self-aware sometimes. But not in a fun Ghostfacers way? It's hard to describe.

I...can't imagine Robbie creating an Alastair or a Uriel, or even a Meg...but maybe I'm forgetting something.

////

Maybe it's Ben Edlund's intellectual(TM) vibe that makes his Sam and Cas more to my liking? Idk. I feel like, since Sam's the only one still alive, getting Sam right would be key to the whole thing hanging together in a sequel. Anyway, I feel like his work in Reading is Fundamental is legitimately Ecclesiastical because he can be more wry/philosophical/satirical. I'm biased--I like philosophy!

He can do entire standalone narrations which are just as “long” but it doesn’t feel so…templated, somehow? It usually just hits better for me, personally. Sometimes he lurches into being too poetic for my liking, too, especially in season 8. But overall, I dig. Meredith can infuse his stuff with some much-needed warmth. It all makes sense in my head!

I think he's at his best when he's being sarcastic and when the action is so fast-paced he doesn't have much time to get stuck doing word-acrobatics. His good guys are conflicted, and his bad guys are really oily. He lets the characters be mean and surly. He can be as deeply fucked up as Sera Gamble when he wants to be (Repo Man????)

////

I can find something I like in most of the writers, even Bucklemming. They have some great devil's advocate lines and political stuff in their scripts, once you comb past the racism, fetishism, and weird pacing.

////

I'm not above keeping Sera Gamble in a cage and letting her out to contribute random, unhinged things. Something is deeply, deeply wrong with her, and that translates well to a good dose of fucky-uppy-ness and incredible pain, which I think Robbie can tend to sleep on a little bit. (Dream a Little Dream of Me, Houses of the Holy?? SO GOOD.)

////

Others? Bobo does some great stuff, but sometimes I find his back-and-forth dialogue to be a little off? I even think something felt off with Cas's speech in Despair as much as I applaud the effort. Steve Yockey does an excellent Rowena.

Also, I'd let Amanda Tapping direct everything. Just because.

////

Mostly, I think they should just hire @angelsdean 🤷  and @jewishtrentcrimm -- I followed them during their live tweeting reactions of The Winchesters and mostly longed for their ideas over what was happening on screen.

////

Most importantly, it’d need a shortform writer in the wings whose job it is to take all the long-winded ppl's excellent monstrosities and chop it to bits and couch it in the right voice with the right amount of prickly subterfuge and defensiveness. A vicious, short-form editor who values brevity and would kill me inside...

Also, we’d need an official meta wrangler, because the meta can start to eat itself and really devolve if you're not careful (I think this is Robbie's Achilles' Heel in some of his stuff; it walks the line reeeeeally close for me in "There's No Place Like Home," for example, but I've come around to "Fan Fiction.")

////

I am...quite happy to be corrected. Knowing who does what well is NOT my specialty.

[sporesgalaxy]

hey! i just saw your rb of your "an Origin for Queen Nothing" comic and it really struck me. ive been wanting to make comics similar to that (and i hope that isn't insensitive) but i struggle even getting started. do you remember anything of your process on that comic, and if so, would you be okay with sharing?

thank you I'm glad it could inspire you!! It's been years since I drew it, but I'll do my best

This really just ended up being me describing every scrap of symbolism, because aside from that my process was "write a poem a million times and hold the specific word meanings and emotions in my brain." How I chose what I did is difficult to explain since I have been doing this for so long, sorry...

•••

I did a lot of writing beforehand. Seems counterintuitive since there's so few words, but I'm naturally verbose so it takes me a looong time for me to boil anything down that much.

I didn't even write it with a comic in mind, I was just trying to put words to my feelings. But the changing intent of the words "not here, not like this" for each part made it suited to be paired with visuals that could guide reader enterpretation a little more. I already had in mind exactly what I meant by each word after I spent so long choosing them; the comic was just me trying to convey that more fully.

I usually don't draw comics so abstract, but it felt like a good way to maintain a sense of privacy even as I talked about very personal feelings.

as far as why I picked the visuals for each panel:

I obviously wanted a lot of empty space for the void panel, but I still wanted it to explain my words. So I tried to create a "something" to define the "nothing" around it, in the simplest visual terms I could. It was originally only one rounded black rectangle, but thag was a bit boring to look at so I added a second one. I placed the words in such a way that it would emphasize how the "something" is defining the "nothing" void around it. A void lies outside "something," whatever isn't "here" and "this."

For fear, I wanted to evoke the feeling as best I could. So black page with white text to evoke darkness was a given, and so were scratchier, shakier lines. Next, I needed to figure out how to recontextualize my words again. "Not here" in the context of fear is easy enough; being trapped or cornered, wanting to be somewhere else but being unable to get away, is the basis for a lot of different fears.

"Not like this" can be taken a lot of ways with fear; something being done to you that you don't want such as acts of violence, general fear of death, or something monsterous and horrible and Other. So the markings around those words could be interpreted as ragged gashes torn through something, or as disfigured claws, reaching towards the inescapable place around "not here."

For the hide panels, originally, I wanted these panels to be a house, but at the time I couldn't think of a pleasing way to abstract it. So it became labyrinthene speech bubbles, which I still meant to at least somewhat evoke rooms, connected nonsensically.

In the context of hiding, "not here, not like this" is directed at the self. Being told or telling oneself that one doesn't "belong," shouldn't be "here." In the "not here" panel, I call back to the void-- the figure lies mostly outside of "something" drawn intersecting them, in the same style as the "something" that the void Was Not. The speech bubble/room the person is in is stretched out of shape by their presence, intersecting a smaller speech bubble below. The person does not fit, and therefore must not "belong" there. A smaller space further away from this one offers an alternative place, "here," to hide from what the person is not.

In the next panel, the person hides in a different "room." But hiding serves only to remind that they are "not like this." The person distorts their hiding spot, despite curling up as small as possible. The original speech bubble/room where the person didn't fit is now back in its undisturbed shape, serving as a reminder that the person is "not like this."

Lastly, persisting. The black page conveys fearful darkness again, representing thenunknowable eldritch horror QN vaguely came into contact withcto become a weird monster. The white eyes and mouth emphasize emotion. The emotions are terror (left) and pain (right). They are no longer abstracted because the immensity of these feelings is greater than the feelings described in the other panels.

QN is too afraid to be anything, and denying oneself is painful, but is also too afraid to become nothing, and so holds on and endures, living in a state of unquestioned self-contradiction in many ways, out of percieved necessity. This unhealthy perception of fear and enduring pain as equivalent to safety and strength is the original core to their character. That's why the focus of these last two panels are simply fear and pain, and the "not here, not like this" simply voices a desperate desire to avoid that fear and pain.

"Not here, not like this" alienates and terrifies them away from living their life, but it is also what they hold onto to survive. This is the great contradiction at the core of Queen Nothing.

[ruki--mukami]

🧩 Admin Announcement 🧩

First of all, I wanted to touch base on a few matters of importance before writing and posting the Halloween open interaction for today.

For those of you who are new to my blog, as I have met very many wonderful people in the span of just a few days, it is my goal to post at least one open interaction per month, though you might've noticed I've been slacking a bit up until the wedding event which was more of a joint effort than the usual solo operation I run.

The purpose of these open interactions is mostly to have a fun ongoing side plot to the main threads that take place, specifically catered towards whatever seasonal event is going on during that month (i.e., the beach trip in July, and now the Halloween shenanigans in October). You might notice a lot of the open interactions thus far seem a bit out of Ruki's forte, as in they're things he normally wouldn't do, and you'd be right. However, I think it's a nice light-hearted break to have some relationship-building and silly moments too in between the usual angst. Think of it as filler episodes in an anime, except actually entertaining. Personally I really enjoy going outside and visiting new places, going on excursions I rarely ever get to go on, and these open interactions tend to reflect that. Of course, it should be known that participation is not mandatory, and I'll still answer unrelated threads in the meantime.

Is it too much work for someone like me, who most likely has at least 100+ unanswered RP threads right now? Probably. Do I care? Not really, lmao. Although I will put a disclaimer that for this Halloween event, I will probably write less verbosely than I typically do. This is because I'm feeling a bit less in the mood for large starters and replies and more so in the mood for brainless shenanigans to be quite candid. You are more than welcome to write very detailed but just know that my word count this time around might not be up to par. What I lack in imagery and detail, I'd like to make up for in actual content. As in, your muse and Ruki can actually get a lot of fun stuff done together this time (or at least, I hope).

And as always, this is just a reminder that next month's open interaction will be focused around Ruki and your muse cooking a meal together, so look forward to that!

In response to the high volume of asks and threads I have ongoing right now, I'm slowly developing a RP thread tracker for myself but since even that needs to be updated every day, it's still quite far from finished which is why I have decided to take it easy for the Halloween open interaction.

All in all, I think that covers everything I wished to discuss. As always, happy RPing and I hope to get to all the inquires and replies soon.

[starwritesficsandstuff]

Seeing you know South Park, what epithets do you think they would get if the South Park characters were part of the Epithet Erased world? I know it’s a weird crossover question, but I am curious.

I have put too much thought into this since receiving this ask. It got me thinking about how the subject of inscribed and mundies would be handled by a town like South Park. Specifically, I have a feeling they'd have some focus on mundie discrimination, aka lexism, and focus on deconstructing it, because that's kinda what South Park with a lot of things. The amount of nuance the show in general might display had it these plot lines, I don't know. It's a little more than what you asked for, but this made the gears in my brain absolutely turn. So here's which characters I think would be inscribed and which I think would be mundies, what the inscribed's epithets are, and what this would bring to the plot.

--

Eric Cartman

Mundie

Very bitter about it.

Internalized Lexism - Targets Kyle out of jealousy and Butters out of hypocrisy.

Cried to his mom to "Get him an epithet" once.

Pretended to have had an epiphany more than once.

Teetering on the dangerous edge of attacking other mundies and attacking inscribed for "needing special powers to succeed at life."

Supports or abhors Bliss Ocean depending on the day.

Kyle Brofloski

Epithet: Verbose

Quickly developed public speaking skills.

Aces vocab quizzes and essays.

His essays are only rivaled by Wendy's, who's known for being able to spot causes-and-effects that everyone else seems to miss, including Mr. Garrison.

They once did a group project together.  It was the most eloquent, well-thought out presentation Mr. Garrison had ever seen.  He gave them an A and extra credit.

Everyone still gives him shit for the Super Best Friends speech.

Accidentally joined the school paper's writing team because Jimmy's skill at persuasion gives Kyle's own speaking skills a run for their money.

Stan Marsh

Mundie

Really doesn't care one way or the other whether or not he ends up with superpowers.

Has pretended to have an epithet before, both as Ranger Stan Marshwalker and as Toolshed.

Makes a lot of jokes like "My epithet is addicted" or "My epithet is depression."

And just has self-deprecating humor in general.

Kyle and Wendy hate these jokes and have asked him to stop on multiple occasions.

They care him. 🥺

Kenny McCormick

Epithet: Cycle

It keeps happening

What keeps happening?

Shouldn't it be obvious?

What do you mean you don't remember???

Immortality (and subsequent everyone forgets) aside, a lot of loops happen near Kenny

It's hard to say if Kevin becoming like their dad is because of Kenny's epithet or not.

His epithet is one of the reasons he is a legit superhero instead of just pretending.

Leopold "Butters" Stotch

Mundie

Happy with his lot in life- as always.

Never pretends to have powers, even as Professor Chaos.

Is certain that he doesn't have an epithet because if a Shuriken to the eye doesn't trigger an epiphany, nothing will.

Craig Tucker

Epithet: Cavia

Has not had his epiphany and probably never will.  Hasn't even realized he has an epithet yet.

Knows the word Cavia (The genus of Guinea Pigs) but never put two and two together because Cavia is such a strange word to be inscribed with.

Thinks the special feeling he gets when he says it is just The Autism because guinea pigs are one of his special interests.

(The other special interest is space!)

Tweek Tweak

Mundie

That twitchiness is one hundred percent Tweek babey!  (Okay some of that twitchiness is actually the meth he doesn't know his coffee is laced with)

Kids in his class used to tried to guess what his epithet was because it seemed like he had one.

His favorite guesses were "Jitters," Kinetic," and "Spaztastic."

The last one was obviously meant to be an insult but he owned it so well that people started to think it was cool.

After his ADD diagnosis, people chilled on trying to guess his non-existent epithet.

Clyde Donovan

Epithet: Insect

Has strange looking eyes because of his epithet; he wears colored contacts to hide it because the kids made fun of him for it.

His eyesight is perfect though!  His eyes aren't compound, but he still has a bigger periphery than most folks.

Also can talk to bugs.

Could have used this power to be a super cool superhero like Mysterion and Call Girl, but instead uses it to cheat on tests.

Kenny and Wendy lament the fact that Clyde wasn't serious about his role as Mosquito.

Around high school some antennae sprouted up, poking through his hair, and he panicked hardcore about it.

He tried to hide them with a hat but they ended up being super sensitive (because. y'know. Bug biology) and when he covered them up it put him through a lot of pain.

He ended up having to openly have them.  Luckily, by that point pretty much everyone had mellowed out and wasn't mean to him about it (excluding Cartman, but everyone started to ignore him at that point).

Tolkien Black

Mundie

Cartman tries to prove that Tolkien has an epithet so hard based on arbitrary things that are in-universe "inscribed stereotypes."

This pisses Tolkien off to no end.

He's also sick of Cartman always asking him why he doesn't want to be inscribed when "having an epithet is clearly better."

Tolkien ends up not only calling out Cartman's stereotyping, but also Cartman's internalized lexism and how he uses it to hurt himself and others.

It really makes Cartman think, though obviously he doesn't actually learn anything from the experience.

When he sees that Cartman hasn't grown at all, Tolkien (rightfully) responds with apathy and basically just shrugs and goes "that's his loss."

Jimmy Valmer

Mundie

Cartman once asked Jimmy what it was like to be both disabled and a mundie.  Jimmy told him to fuck off.

After Tolkien called Cartman out for his internalized lexism, Jimmy came up with an entire comedy routine centered around bashing how stupid lexism was.

Cartman laughed at the routine and once again learned nothing anyway.

Convinced Kyle to join the school paper's writing team.

Nathan is also a mundie, so their rivalry remains unchanged.

Timmy Burch

Epithet: Thoughtful

Though he cannot speak out loud, he has telepathic powers that allow him to communicate.

Despite this, he doesn't really like talking telepathically with many people (He's not a fan of how it feels).

Usually he only uses telepathy to talk to his parents, his teachers, and Jimmy.

The game of superheroes is the only time any of the other kids heard his telepathic voice.

This dislike of using his telepathy is why he doesn't become a hero for real.

There have been some effort from his parents and teachers to start using his telepathy as a main form of communication, but Jimmy and some of his other friends have encouraged him to do whatever makes him comfortable instead.

Most of the adults see it as a "cure" he's not taking advantage of while Jimmy and Timmy see it no differently than they do their mobility aids.  Still, talk of a "cure" makes his telepathy even less appealing.

Note: With the context of the game, and given that there's no good in-universe explanation for how the telepathy worked in TFBW, this seemed like the obvious choice. However, I wanted to make it so that it didn't "cure" Timmy's disability. This was the middle ground I came up with. I'm absolutely willing to workshop this is anyone finds that it needs improvement.

Scott Malkinson

Mundie

Kind of got teased by other kids for "Having the epithet diabetes."

Like the "spaztastic" situation, it was meant to be mean but he ended up owning it.

Unlike the "spaztastic" situation, it didn't become cool, people just stopped saying it.

Afterwards, nothing else really happened?  Even with all the epithet-guessing trends in their school, Scott kinda fell on the wayside.

Trust me, this was not a bad thing.

Wendy Testaburger

Epithet: Network

Skilled when it comes to linking concepts together.

Became a superhero like Kenny when she heard about Mysterion for the first time.

Had chosen her hero gimmick because she was skilled at using technology- she didn't actually have her epiphany until her first encounter with a villain who wasn't Butters.

Could also be a detective given her abilities.

Bebe Stevens

Epithet: Gerrymander

If it sparkles and pleases, she will now sway the vote.

Very good at convincing people to think or act one way or another.

Even better at convincing them not to act at all.

Knows she has an epithet but doesn't actually know what the word is yet.

Some of the kids call her a liar, but most of her friends and (shockingly but also not) Cartman believe her.

She has no clue what the word Gerrymander even is.

Has her epiphany in the middle of a high school political science class.

Sylvie would attack her on-sight, methinks.

Red McArthur

Mundie

Has managed to slip under the radar in terms of school "epithet crazes."

She hasn't been targeted by Cartman like Butters or had kids guessing at an imaginary epithet like Tweek.

Never had a phase where she thought she might have had an epithet or flipped through the pages of a dictionary to find something that resonated.

Basically, the mundiest mundie who ever mundied.

She is content this way to.  She has a very happy life!

Nichole Daniels

Epithet: Whimsical

Her epithet doesn't do much; it can make her eyes and hair appear iridescent at times and gives her a quick-witted sense of humor, but that's about it.

She's also a fantastic story-teller and fairly artistic, but it's hard to tell whether or not this is a result of her epithet or not.

She has a love for all things fairies, and she really relates to Craig when he talks about his special interests because she feels similarly about fairies.  She and her parents have flip-flopped over whether this is completely an epithet thing or if there might be some autism mixed in.

This kind of debate is not uncommon in neurodivergent inscribed kids.

She had her epiphany shortly before moving to South Park, but had a little bit of imposter syndrome over it, sometimes believing it to be a false positive despite it having a physical effect.

She overcame her imposter syndrome with help from the other girls and Tolkien.

Heidi Turner

Mundie

You don't even want to know what being in a relationship with Cartman was like for her when his lexism bullshit was involved on top of everything else.

Girlie, you can't fix him.

Became a little insecure about being a mundie after breaking up with Cartman, but the other girls helped her overcome it.

--

Sorry if this was more than you were expecting; like I said, this made my brain go brrrr. Feel free to send more asks about this crossover, I'm willing to spend more time pondering this AU (or literally anything else that someone wants to see mashed-up with Epithet Erased).

[comicbookhyperfixationtime]

Uncanny X-Men #195- It Was a Dark and Stormy Night

Last Issue Recap: A routine stakeout on Juggernaut turned nasty when Nimrod showed up and started blasting. He was barely driven off thanks to a clutch move by Rogue, but the X-men's decision to let Juggey go without a fight has landed them in even hotter water with the public. Meanwhile, Ruskies are scheming and Storm's off in Africa.

This cover is so amazingly dumb and beautiful and I love it. Like, its literally Wolverine about to murder a child. Everyone's expression is gold. Of course its a fakeout, Wolverine isn't going to murder a child this issue, but I'll be damned if its not effective at grabbing my attention. I vaguely recognize these kids from a Thor comic from the same era they should up in but I'll be damned if I remember a thing about them. I guess Marvel was pushing them really hard at the time. Edit: after doing some research I have discovered the Power Pack was actually created by one of the Marvel comics editors, which explains a lot about their seeming omnipresence.

The opening narration gives a brief summation of who these little rascals are (they are called Power Pack, a quartet of siblings who were given powers by a dying alien Green Lantern style) which explains them I guess but also doesn't explain them at all.

We see the Power Pack in bed with their parents, awoken by the sound of thunder. Because, its a Dark and Stormy Night, get it? What a waste of a good title, why would you name an X-men story "It Was a Dark and Stormy Night" when Storm isn't even there?! A great pun, flushed down the drain.

I think the following dialogue is a good example of Claremont's limits as I writer. Even though I can tell he's trying to simplify his style for kids, this dialogue is still quite longwinded and a bit too verbose. Of course, struggling to write convincing child dialogue isn't a Claremont specific problem, I don't recall Power Pack sounding any more natural in the Thor comic they showed up in. But in the Thor comic, the characters I actually cared about showed up pretty quickly. We spend the first third of this comic with these kids as the only focus, so the awkward dialogue starts to really grate. Doesn't help that the art on the kids is not so hot, their bodies are sometimes weirdly proportioned, and their faces misshapen. Kids are clearly not John Romita Jr's wheelhouse, although he's a great artist.

The Power Pack realizes their parents and neighbors have forgotten who they are, and what's more, all their possessions have been cleared out like they never existed in the first place! This is an excellent setup that will quickly become an extremely stupid plot hole.

The phonetic accent is... certainly a choice. It's Claremont in the 80s, could be worse I guess. But more importantly, these children call themselves the Power Pack... and their their last name is "Powers"... and they don't even wear masks! Wikipedia tells me they had secret identities, how the heck did they keep that up?!

The kid's parents are about to call the police, so they make a run for it, using their powers to blast a hole through their apartment building and causing massive property damage rather than leaving like normal people, I guess because we needed to establish their powers. This doesn't really help me understand their power sets at all, though. Also their personalities are pretty much interchangeable, except for perhaps the youngest, so no matter how many times they repeat each other's names I'm not going to remember them. Best I can gather, the youngest girl absorbs (matter? energy?) to make things explode, the brown haired boy turns into mist, the older girl has Canonball powers but with the pansexual flag, and the oldest boy does gravity manipulation?

The children decide that this series of unfortunate events must be the doing of Annalee, a Morlock who'd previously attempted to forcefully adopted them, with the help of another Morlock with memory manipulation powers. You might say to yourself, "but Fix, this makes no sense because if the Morlocks could access the Powers' house and steal all their stuff why wouldn't they have just kidnapped the kids as well?" You would be right! Unfortunately, so are the kids.

The kids decide to confront the Morlock's themselves, rather than try to find help in the city where literally every other person is either a superhero or related to them, which does seem like the sort of idiotic action a child would take.

The X-men, Spiderman, Cloak and Dagger and Thor?! Jesus, these kids must know everyone in the MC(omics)U! Hell, give them a few more issues and they may meet Jesus too!

The kids enter the sewers, quipping the whole time. Actually, they've been quipping throughout the entire issue; never let it be said that a mood-killing sarcastic comment in a Marvel Movie is not comics accurate. They're confronted by the Morlocks who (unsurprisingly) overpower them quickly. Only the youngest, Katie, escapes, but not before being disfigured by one of Morlocks, Masque, who has plastic surgery powers. The damage to her face is hidden from us and from the way Masque's fingers stick to Katie's flesh in a previous panel like it's hot play-dough, it must be pretty nasty. I kind of enjoyed the brief body horror here, its definitely an interesting idea, I want to see Masque again used to her full potential.

Exactly my reaction if some stranger approached me talking like that.

We finally cut to the X-Mansion and Kitty having her morning breakfast/midnight snack, where its revealed she apparently does some work for the Power Pack's father. Not sure if she's a student assistant or an intern or what have you, especially since she's supposed to be a highschooler, but it doesn't matter because this will never come up again!

She living my life fr fr. Love the little detail of the milk missing the bowl.

We finally get a reveal for what Masque did to Katie's face and I'm going to be honest it really doesn't look that bad. Nowhere near as horrifying as Kitty's mullet.

Kitty and some of the other of the X-men rescue Katie. Not Nightcrawler, though "he's on another mission." Boooooo. I might as well just stop reading. Unfortunately, my completionist tendencies urge me onward, although I expect the next issue to be a totally Nightcrawler-centric or I'm going to write a letter to the editor.

Rachel recaps the first half of the issue via telepathy for the X-men, who vow to help the little tyke.

No she's fucking not, she was literally introduced kidnapping torturing and attempting to rape Angel! I seriously don't get how the X-men manage to gloss over that in all of her subsequent appearances, or why she's ever written as remotely sympathetic (aside from the fact Claremont wants to get stepped on). I'd put her on par with Mastermind for deplorable levels.

Kitty is unanimously elected Team Leader. You got to love a team of people so dysfunctional that the teenager is their current most competent member. This does explain why the best boy has been so unceremoniously left out this week, as Nightcrawler probably wouldn't enact a plan as boneheaded as "rush head-on into Morlock territory with one of the children you're trying to rescue. I can't blame her, though, she is literally a child.

We get a cute little character moment where Wolverine comforts and bonds with a scared Katie that I kind of mentally glossed over because I don't care. It's not that it's poorly written or anything (although it is longwinded), its just I'm really not invested in these kids we never met and their emotional struggles I've been introduced to five minutes ago. I just want to get to the part where people punch each other already.

And get to the punching we shall! The X-men find the room where Annalee is keeping the children, and their stuff.

Average College Dorm Experience.

To the X-men's shock and horror, the Morlocks have mutated the other Powers' children to be slightly uglier as well! They've also brainwashed them to think Annalee is their real mother. Again, why this couldn't have been done when they snuck into their house to steal all their furniture, I don't know.

The X-men start brawling with the brainwashed kids, plus a menagerie of Morlocks. Rogue is kicking ass but gets whammied by Leech, who whammies himself in the process. I'm really enjoying the creative scenarios that Rogues' powerset can create. She's definitely the highlight of this issue.

Leech temporarily strips Rogue of her powers, meaning she'll have to take out the Morlocks the old fashioned way, which she does no problem because Rogue is a badass.

Damn, Aang really let himself go.

Meanwhile, for the rest of the team (sans Rachel who just disappears for a couple pages?) the mooks start coming and they don't stop coming, so Kitty Pryde slips off to rescue the kids herself while Wolvie performs gratuitous offscreen violence. She gets Annalee to surrender with a quick "what would your dead children think?" speech, at which point peak femcel Callisto shows up, just in time to be useless.

The plot is resolved, and Annalee finally processes her trauma from her children's death and makes peace with the Power Pack. And then Rachel and her rattail show back up to let the team know they're being summoned to the X-Mansion... by Magneto, for Secret Wars II!

Wait didn't we just have Secret Wars?!

Oh god, we're entering the Age of the Event Comic, aren't we?! There's going to be a new one every year (at least every 12 issues!) and its going to be convoluted and my completionist ass is going to read every single one of them. But not here because I don't want to.

Anyway, this was a waste of an issue. Usually I'm chill with a breather episode, but I don't care about Power Pack and this wasn't really that fun. The X-men weren't given a lot of time to shine, especially Rachel and poor, poor Kurt. Especially since now I'm going to have to speedrun through Secret Wars II real quick just to make sure I'm all caught up on the drama (expect a brief, unhinged review coming soon).

[sinister-faye]

Gamedev update

The good, the bad, and the revelation.

Hello my fellow artists, gamedevs, and other folk who stumbled upon this.

Tldr; I have to stop Armageddon ignition til I have more time and a team, but I have other things I want to release to help me get funds to help with both problems.

Here is the long version:

It's been a spell since the last update. The delays are complex and fairly personal. But the conclusions I've come to on the other side of my chaotic life are going to shape what this solo dev project will ultimately become.

The good

So for the longest time I kept hammering away at my game while having some blinders on. One core belief I held was that I was going to do this all solo. While writing and planning a game that I needed 12 voice actors for at a minimum. (The full weight of that dichotomy crashed over me later, don't worry.) Watching my first in game cutscenes and hearing either a soulless bot spit out the lines, or my own attempts at doing multiple voices, raised some flags in my mind. But I still pressed on. I just needed to work on the game every day.

I also wasn't seeing as much growth in followers with my various blogs or twitter. Sure I made posts. But they seem to blather about nothing and I never have anything other than a screenshots to hype my game.

Life then forced a large break on my time. A month and a half long break that was personal, and a little painful still. This forced break I took helped me see my process and allowed myself to do some introspection on my marketing, presentation, and my goals.

The good news is the game is still gonna happen, and I'm still going to develop it. But...

The bad

Because of this vague event in my life my time is now strained In a way that will prevent me from working on this game enough to make any meaningful progress. And this time constraint won't loosen for at least a year. I want to come back to it. And I have a plan to come back stronger.

During my month long interlude I had some time to think about each thing I could improve on.

1. Better content: guys I'm verbose. And I'm sorry I'm verbose. I really should have been a writer or a philosopher. The accounts I see with the most growth get that growth from .gifs. if I can't sell the idea in a gif I won't post it. Unless it's a bigger how to, or post mortem.

2. Solo development for a game is only good if the game I am making has 1 or less voice actors.

3. Art as a medium is under attack and we need to build groups to make it through. Solo dev only helps a solo person. Team efforts can help teams of people.

4. I talk a lot of talk. Boy do these words I say allude to a lot, without revealing a thing. Even this post assumes that there is a major audience clamoring to hear any small update. I need fans first.

Through all the navel gazing, the most important thing I Learned is that I need to start building a community, but the life event left me a little despondent . Most of my time was spent healing and getting back a good headspace. Now I'm refreshed and ready to use what little free time I have towards making a studio that is a group effort.

The revelation.

During my break I saw the writers strike, I saw the actors strike, I saw rights being pillaged from our livelihoods inch by inch. And I saw people win to get a fairer share. In order to complete Armageddon ignition I'm going to need money to properly pay some voice actors, I want to get more people involved. I finally started a game that I think will see the light of day. But I no longer want to be a hermit about it. And I want a team with more perspectives than my own to help me.

There are too many companies bleeding creative teams dry for "content", there are too many ceo's who look for tools or pipelines that completely remove humans to save a buck for the next quarterly earnings.

My goal has shifted from producing a game as a solo creative to building a company. A group of people who share in the earnings of their product, rather than some white dude who went to Yale and learned that slashing jobs makes the next quarterly earnings look a little better and gamed his own paycheck to give him more money than they ever "saved".

But I don't have the funds now, nor do I want borrowed equity for this thing. If I'm going to build up an organization that is more artistic focused, rather than profit focused. I can't do it on debt that can be leveraged to destroy a queer, story driven studio.

So in order to get a cash flow started I found something that I can do with my much leaner free time. This is going to be an animated project that can, on paper and not just in my head, be developed and maintained by a solo artist.

This time I'm going to release the videos and let the work speak for itself, rather than wax on before it's even done. Once I have some time back I'll try to make a post mortem.

So as far as timelines go. This is going to push back this game indefinitely. But I hope to utilize this time to actually build something that can benefit the game industry. And build a better game in general.

The next blog should be coming with enough detail to sell you on what I have cooking.

See you soon

[thisonesatellite]

H, I, K 💜

Hello lovely, thank you for your ask! 💖💖💖 Here we go!

H. How would you describe your style?

What a great question--- and harder to answer than i thought.

Minimalist, i think is the most apt description. i tend to write in as few words as possible. My polishing process is usually me taking things out and pruning everything down to the necessary words and no more. (A quality that absolutely does not translate to my ask answers, as you can see. Those are all kinds of verbose. 🤣)

Other than that, i guess--- heavily rooted in realism. Yes, even when i build my own worlds. Especially when i build my own worlds. And i don't mean just research, of which i do a lot. For example my dialogue is not only what i think human beings from whichever background would say, i spend a ridiculous amount of time on making sure it's in character for each protagonist, specifically. i find dialogue the most powerful weapon to use for character definition and exposition, and it must ring real and true. (Same ofc goes for the worlds i build, down to "where would they get their power /food /clothes /medical supplies", etc., and for fight scenes, which i endlessly visualize in my head to make sure every weapon and blow lands with the correct hand in the correct place and so on.)

i drive myself nuts over these things. Maybe that's my writing style. Insane with a side of connection and a large helping of plot. 🤣

I. Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

YES. Although i refuse to feel guilty about it. i sometimes write Happy Endings that will rot all your teeth and possibly your brain. Some fics require them. i will on occasion put my main protagonists Through Some Things and then i make up for it by shamelessly piling on saccharine until everyone is in a post-sugar coma.

Same goes for reading. Sometimes i go back to one of my comfort fics and skip to the Good Part and reread just that portion, for Reasons.

Because some days you need the Happy more than others, and that's OK. 💖

K. What's the angstiest idea you've ever come up with?

Ooooooooooooh--- good question! First and foremost i have to say that i am not really an angst writer. My characters frequently go through some Things (as mentioned earlier), and i seem to have my own special brand of fluffy darkness, but i have an odd relationship with angsty fics. i don't like angst for angst's sake. i personally don't like it when characters get put through the wringer just to see the damage. i need angst to be rooted in realism (ah, there's the realism again), and i need the reason for the angst to be plausible--- within the character arc and within the world of a story. Well-executed angst, however, is freaking catnip.

My angstiest idea is actually a fic called everybody knows, and it's the last fic i wrote for my first fandom. In it the main character is a con artist, who loses control of his own con and develops Feelings for his mark, and of course that cannot go well. There's some brutal reckoning once the jig is up, and some painful rebuilding of trust, but there is also the most epically flufferific happy ending that has ever been candy coated and dipped in sugar. (Along with countless plot twists and a bunch of action because apparently i cannot help myself. 🤣)

.

OK. Whew. That was probably more than you bargained for, but apparently i cannot answer things briefly.

THANK YOU SO MUCH for these questions! 💕💕💕

[buckets-and-trees]

‘Into cursed pixie dust’ was the first fic I read from you I think aspen and I was stunned. I’d never read anything like it before and I thought it was such a beautiful take on the winter soldier and it instantly made me follow you. I can’t explain how you made me feel with it, I just know it blew me away and I wanted to let you know how much of an incredible writer you are 💗

Thank you, Mollie! You sharing this is incredibly special to my heart. I know I talk about my heart a lot when talking about writing or reading things, but I really do engage my heart a fair amount of the time, and that's one of the reasons I do adore creating and engaging with other creators in this fandom - there's so much that can be shared and experienced across the board. But I really do mean it.

The Brooklyn Boys was the series I started out posting here, but Into Cursed Pixie Dust was the first one-shot. I had the concept, researched, and posted it in the space of about a week, which...idk, sometimes I write things quickly and sometimes slowly, but that one with all the research that went into it, topping out at almost 9k, and having the soft dark and smutty components that it did, it felt kind of magical that it came together in one week.

It's stayed in the top five or so of my favorite stories. It meant a lot to me. I adore where it went thematically, emotionally. I loved the challenges I felt like I was able to meet as a writer.

But then like... Mollie, you saying it resonated with you? And another friend read it and commented this week with similar sentiment, and it's not like this fic has gone crazy with comments or anything, but it's not isolated comments so it seems even more special because it's like it's really not just my story anymore.

I need to go blush a lot now. I certainly got verbose in answering this ask, but my heart was full. Is full. And on top of that I'm even more sentimental since I've been able to get to know you even better recently, so it's just a lot of feels. 💚

Just...thank you for sending this for celebrating with me for this sleepover.