#if i ever finish that fucking fic ill use a lyric from that as the title

[aocello]

If you reach my level of transcendence you will realise that okinimesumama eve is a zack/johan coded song. also the line "waiting for the 1-2 signal" fits real nice if you see it in that context .. Bc you know a 1-2 combo in boxing ....... Hahahahahahaha

[the-arcana-headcanons]

Heyy!I had a tumblr break cuz uni and work have been eating me alive,so I am currently trying to work out my writer's block.To get in the mood,I would like to ask for your matchmaker abilities and choose smb out of the M6✨️🩷

Welp,I am a queer girl (not good on labels tbh😂),mediterannean skintone,light brown eyes and light brown hair with honey highlights (that's the best description I could give sorry hehe)

Naturally I am an ambivert.When I am in a good mood I can get really social and I love humor in conversations it literally fixes my day.Usually the energetic one in groups in which I feel comfortable but I also value serioussness and deep talks and in one to one relationships.Can yap endlessly about any topic,I think however that for some people,that can be too much.

I have been told to be the therapist friend🤠, however mental health struggles and lupus, my autoimmune disease (invisible illness team yayy) can get the better of me sometimes,so there are moments where I get more introverted and need sometime to cool off from overthinking.I have had huge trouble with social anxiety,but I have learned to deal with it.Its a struggle,but I have made huge progress and I keep trying

I hate arguements and when tensions go high.I believe that if two people really care about eachother,wether that be friends,family,or partners,everything can be solved with civilised dialogue and respect.As you can imagine,conflict is not my strong suit hehe

I study architecture,and for a hobby I do theater classes,and ballet.Home hobbies are sketching, and writing,wether that be fics about my fictional crushes👀👀 or lyrics to help me vocalize my issues.

Rock music is LITERALLY my long lost dream.

That's all,I hope I didn't come off as a narcissistic for writing so much about mee.

WAITING FOR YOUR WISDOM DEAR MATCHMAKER🤌

labels don't matter actually I just use them to know whether to match someone with the boys or the girls or both, but you said M6 so both it is

also don't feel bad for writing so much! the more people write in their requests the more detailed my matchups can be!

anyways, Julian!

Julian prefers to be in smaller groups, really preferably just the two of you, and he loves going back and forth between fun silly conversations and deep serious ones too. Julian would love your yapping, yap away, he's a very good listener. Although he does get a little spaced out sometimes just staring at you and thinking about how beautiful you are and how lucky he is and how he doesn't understand how he deserves you and then he has to awkwardly ask you to repeat yourself. Julian definitely is in need of a therapist friend sometimes but he also would be your biggest supporter when you aren't feeling as well. He'd let you take his bed in Mazlinka's little cabin and he's bring you special medicinal soup and give you lots of space to feel better. Or he'd stay and just cuddle or be there as a comforting presence if you wanted him to. Social anxiety isnt a problem for him, he's mastered the art pretending he's confident, so if you ever shut down socially he can handle it for you. He'd also be so supportive of helping you work on and improve it, it's like acting and he's great at that. He doesn't like conflict either, arguments and tension make him spiral and isolate himself, so he is not one to jump to causing tension. He may have a hard time communicating sometimes but he wants to and he tries to. He'd be so fascinated with your knowledge on architecture, whenever you'd be walking around he'd point out buildings and things and ask what you think about them. He also LOVES that you do theatre, he fucking adores theatre, he would love to take you to shows. He would encourage your sketching writing so much, he'd want to watch if you were okay with it, but he wouldn't mind if you weren't. He'd always be asking to look at your finished works too

[pedrito-friskito]

the way we were / the way we are - masterlist

you met Bucky between the bookshelves. he stole your heart beneath starry skies. it was a match made in heaven, but fate had other plans.

(Bucky Barnes x reader fic; this story follows the general timeline of the MCU - with some obvious differences. I'm horrible at writing summaries, but essentially this encompasses all the versions of Bucky we all know from the movies and show: the all-American military man, The Winter Soldier, the semi-stable 100-year-old man, the White Wolf, and beyond. Reader becomes a variation of the super-soldier)

A/N: this fic is posted in full (incomplete right now) on ao3! link is here! I haven’t worked on it in a while but I am determined to finish it eventually. it was the first fic I ever posted online and what got me back into fanfiction and eventually lead me back to tumblr lol so be gentle! this is a fix-it fic (of sorts - I didn’t change everything)

warnings/notices: smut, fluff, falling in love, some chapters deal with Bucky’s PTSD/mental illness after being the Winter Soldier. all violence depicted is canon-typical for the most part, chapters will have warnings but if you can handle the MCU, you should be okay here!

there is use of y/n - it was all the rage when I started writing this LOL I might phase it out in future chapters but it’s sticking for the time being (if that’s not your jam, all my other fics/oneshots do NOT use y/n so check those out if you like!)

chapter titles are song lyrics - the updated spotify playlist is here.

*chapters w/ smut are marked w/ a “*”!!

chapters (chronologically by movie):

the first avenger:

1 - the first time ever I saw your face

2 - take this heart of gold and melt it down*

3 - I got soul but I’m not a soldier

4 - if I should go before you

5 - tell me where your heart is

6 - is there somebody who can watch you

7 - when you hear my voice, when you say my name*

8 - these days are numbered

the avengers:

9 - this world is not my home

the winter soldier:

10 - back in my body

11 - how many times can I break till I shatter

12 - what am I here for

age of ultron:

13 - when the night is over

14 - nothing left for you

civil war:

15 - way down we go

16 - judgement day*

17 - you can never break the chain

18 - nobody teaches you to hurt like this

19 - sad, beautiful, tragic

20 - whatever helps you sleep at night

infinity war:

21 - I could use somebody

22 - when it feels like this

23 - make this go on forever

24 - if we had five more minutes

25 - do you want to die together?

endgame:

26 - but I’m forever missing him (and you caused it)

27 - are you really gonna love me when I’m gone?

28 - okay, fine, maybe I’m just a little nostalgic

29 - every night I’m dancing with your ghost

30 - taking care of soulfight

31 - soldier, poet, king

32 - home is wherever I’m with you

33 - you’re the one who breaks my heart right

the falcon and the winter soldier:

34 - I think I’ve seen this film before and I didn’t like the ending

35 - give me a minute to hold my girl

36 - it’s not easy to be me

37 - I try to be happy but it’s hard sometimes

38 - it wasn’t easy to be happy for you

39 - try not to abuse your power

40 - let’s fall in love for the night

41 - need the sun to break

42 - not ready to make nice

43 - too much is never enough

44 - the man who can’t be moved

45 - nothing fucks with my baby

46 - I was far too scared to hit him…

47 - …but I would hit him in a heartbeat now

48 - that funny feeling

49 - easy on me

[alastaircarstairsdefenselawyer]

champagne problems (part 1)

here's my first part of my modern no magic "champagne problems" singer-songwriter quarantine thomastair AU! happy birthday to @foxglove-airmid even though I don't think it's your birthday where you live anymore (and I still haven't posted zia's birthday fic, it'll happen I swear)!

no content warnings for this part (besides maybe quarantine), but future parts will include discussions of mental illness, substance abuse, and a suicide attempt

obviously, the song alastair "wrote" in the fic is not mine, it's by taylor swift! and a few of the lyrics have been changed!

Masterlist | AO3

Thomas breathed out a sigh of relief as he lugged his suitcase up onto the fifth floor landing.

“‘Ere we are,” Piers announced as he unlocked the door.

Thomas was utterly exhausted, such was the result of taking a redeye flight across the Atlantic during a global pandemic, but any idea of rest that he’d had was interrupted when he heard the sound of piano flood the apartment.

“Ah, sorry about that,” Piers nodded, “One of my flatmates, the walls are paper thin. He can’t record at the studio right now, but he’s trying to finish his EP, so it’s been a bit noisier around here. He’ll take a break soon, hopefully.”

Thomas shook his head. ���It’s no problem. Thank you, again, for allowing me to stay here. I’ll be looking for my own place as soon as the quarantine is up.”

“Of course. You’ve got the couch as long as you need it. Couldn’t just hang you out to dry, could I? Although, you did pick a god awful time to move to the city, if I do say so myself.”

Thomas sat down on the couch and tried to make himself comfortable. It was more comfortable than the flight or the airport, at least. “I know… I considered postponing the move, but the visa was so difficult to get, I just couldn’t pass up the opportunity. They say this will all blow over in a couple of weeks, but borders are closing and I heard talk of them suspending all pending visa applications. I didn't know how long it would be if I waited, if the job was even still here for me at all.” Although at first entrance, the music had seemed to be a nuisance, it now comforted him. It wasn’t bad at all, in fact, it quite reminded him of the days Alastair’s playing had filled their flat…

“Where did you say you were working again? At a record company?”

“Yeah. I’m just doing pretty basic stuff for now, but if I ever do want to record my own music, I’ve got to start somewhere.”

“Hm,” Piers said, gesturing to the room the music was coming from. “Perhaps you’ll get on with him well, then. Would you like some tea?”

Thomas nodded and Piers went to start the teapot. Piers continued, “Though I suppose he's more of the tortured artist type. Very reserved, quite prickly. I didn't even meet him until a couple weeks after I moved in here because he was off in some psychiatric hospital.” Thomas shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He was never one for gossip. “My other roommate’s nice, though, I think you’ll like him. He-”

“How did you end up in New York, again? I don’t think I ever asked.”

Piers dove into the subject change quite readily, explaining his uni - or college - years in New York City and his decision to stay afterwards. Thomas had tuned most of it out, truthfully. It wasn’t that he was trying to be rude, but he was rather exhausted, and Piers was wearing thin on his patience.

As the kettle started to whine, Thomas heard the musician begin to sing, and he froze. It sounded so much like Alastair. But it couldn't be, could it? With over 8 million people living in the city, he would not end up in Alastair's apartment by accident. His Alastair was certainly reserved and prickly, but it wasn't possible. It must be like all those times he thought he saw him on a street he'd never walked or heard his laugh in a café he'd never been to. Just his mind, tricking him. Even if he knew that voice so well, despite not hearing it in so long.

“It’s quite good, isn’t it? His first single just dropped.” Piers asked, bringing over his cup of tea. He hadn’t realized it, but he’d been staring intently at the door.

Thomas took the cup. “Hm? Yeah, I guess. Thanks.”

“You should look it up. It’s called “champagne problems” by Simurgh. That’s spelled- Well, it should come up.”

The name Simurgh sounded familiar, but Thomas couldn’t put his finger on where he knew it from. At Piers’ insistence, he pulled out his phone and brought up the song. As he skimmed through the first few lines, a cold feeling settled in his stomach.

“You booked the night train for a reason So you could sit there in this hurt Bustling crowds or silent sleepers You're not sure which is worse”

“Simurgh,” Thomas realized.

“Yeah, I think it’s Arabic or something.”

It took Thomas a moment to process that Piers was responding to him. “It’s Persian.” He was certain that Alastair would have some very stern words to say if he heard Piers confusing the two, actually. Thomas had admittedly let his Farsi skills deteriorate quite a bit since the breakup, but he was fairly certain the name came from the Shahnameh. There was no doubt in Thomas’ mind now: he was staying in Alastair’s apartment, and Alastair’s first single was about one of the most painful days in Thomas’ life. “I, er, I used to study it.”

“Oh, yes, that’s right!” Piers launched into a tangent that Thomas tuned out as he read through the rest of the page.

“Because I dropped your hand while dancing Left you out there standing Crestfallen on the landing Champagne problems”

“Thomas? Are you alright?”

He realized then that his hand was trembling so badly that his tea nearly spilled. He used his other hand to steady it. “Oh, uh, yes, I’m just tired.”

“Perhaps you should rest. I can ask Alastair to quiet down for a while-”

“No!” he exclaimed rather too forcefully. “No, that’s not necessary. I’d just rather not talk, if that’s alright.”

Piers nodded.

Thomas kept reading.

“Your mom's ring in your pocket My picture in your wallet Your heart was glass, I dropped it Champagne problems”

Of all the songs, why did he release the one about him? Why was it about a memory still so painful in Thomas’ heart, all of these years later? He remembered it so well, standing there, alone, shattered into a million pieces.

“You told your family for a reason You couldn't keep it in Your sister splashed out on the bottle Now no one's celebrating”

He was fairly certain that Barbara had been more excited than even he was, confident that Alastair would accept, and so very proud of her baby brother, all grown up. She’d been furious when it fell apart, but it was her who stood with him during the aftermath, who boarded him onto a train to Edinburgh to visit Eugenia when he couldn’t stand to be in the same city as him any longer, who went through his phone, blocking all of Alastair’s accounts so that he could obsess over him no longer, who comforted him as he wept and held him as he picked the pieces of himself back up again.

And all the more sour was the memory in light of her death.

“Dom Pérignon, you brought it No crowd of friends applauded Your hometown skeptics called it Champagne problems”

He looked up at Piers, who had fortunately become enthralled with something on his phone and was no longer paying Thomas any mind. He lifted the teacup gingerly to his lips, but he felt far too sick to take a drink.

“You had a speech, you're speechless Love slipped beyond your reaches And I couldn't give a reason Champagne problems”

A reason, that’s all Thomas had wanted. Just any explanation. He understood if they were moving too fast, or perhaps he’d misread something, but he just didn’t understand it.

Why? Why can’t you tell me why? I deserve an explanation, Alastair. Please, anything.

I… I’m sorry, Thomas.

Stop it! Stop apologizing! We can just go home and pretend this never happened, please, forget about all of it, it was a stupid idea-

Thomas, stop. I shouldn’t’ve… This was a mistake. I’m sorry I didn’t see that sooner.

That was the moment Thomas felt his heart stop beating.

“Your Midas touch on the Chevy door November flush and your flannel cure "This dorm was once a madhouse" I made a joke, "Well, it's made for me" How evergreen, our group of friends Don't think we'll say that word again And soon they'll have the nerve to deck the halls That we once walked through”

Despite the nearly two decades Thomas had spent in London before Alastair, it was never the same without him. He saw him everywhere he went, despite knowing he was thousands of miles away. After graduating uni that May, he accepted a spot at a graduate program in Spain and didn’t look back.

“One for the money, two for the show I never was ready so I watch you go Sometimes you just don't know the answer 'Til someone's on their knees and asks you "You’re the only one I want by my side, What a shame you’re fucked in the head," you said”

Those were the words that haunted Thomas’ nightmares, even now.

It’s you! It’s only you for me! It was always going to be you! But I can see now that I was never going to be enough for you, you and your secrets and walls and your lies. It’s a shame… it’s a shame you’re so fucked in the head, Alastair. You’ll never truly love anyone, will you? You’re not physically capable of it.

Alastair hadn’t responded. Thomas had wanted a rise out of him, any reaction at all, despite knowing how lethal and volatile Alastair could become when provoked. But there was nothing. Not a flicker of anything in his steeled expression. He’d simply looked down, apologized again for any pain that he’d caused, and left.

That was the last time they’d spoken.

Thomas and his sister left for Edinburgh that night, and when he’d returned to London, Alastair was gone.

“Well, you'll find the real thing instead Who'll patch up your tapestry that I shred And hold your hand while dancing Never leave you standing Crestfallen on the landing With champagne problems”

Thomas couldn’t imagine giving his heart to anyone again, not now and certainly not then. He’d dated in Madrid, but it had always stayed casual. He’d made sure of it. He could see now that he and Alastair had gotten together quickly, moved in together quickly, done all of it very quickly. After all, he’d fallen hard and fast. He gave all of himself to Alastair, and he’d nearly lost all of himself in the process.

“Your mom's ring in your pocket New picture in your wallet You won't remember all my Champagne problems

“You won't remember all my Champagne problems”

Now, he wondered what the rest of the story was. He’d convinced himself that Alastair had never loved him, that he was heartless and cruel, though he’d known that wasn’t true. Could Alastair have written this song if he’d never truly loved him? Perhaps he was a sociopath.

Thomas felt like he should run. Like he should pick up his bag and dart out of the apartment before Alastair could notice him, find some hotel somewhere with undoubtedly extraordinary high rates and just pretend like this never happened. He could get back on a plane and go back home to his parents and delete his phone browser history and pretend like this was all just a bad dream. But he could not move.

He didn’t know how many minutes had passed before Alastair’s door opened. He looked up with a start.

“Thomas,” Alastair breathed. He stood wide eyed, flushed.

“Do you two already know each other then?” Piers asked.

There was a moment of silence before Thomas cleared his throat. “We used to,” he said, looking down.

“I, er, I forgot that your friend was coming today,” Alastair told Piers. “It’s quite a long journey from London, you should have told me, I would have been quieter.”

Thomas considered correcting him for a moment, but decided not to. “Don’t worry about it. I heard you had your first big release. Congratulations.”

Alastair gave an awkward nod. “Thank you. Right, well, I’ll just…” He rushed over to the kitchen and pulled a bottle of water from the fridge. “I’ll try to be a bit quieter.”

“Don’t- It’s fine, really. In fact, I’m sure there’s some hotel in the area I can stay at for now, actually-”

“Well, don’t leave on my account,” Alastair interrupted. “We agreed to let you stay here, and the city’s a bloody mess right now. I’ll stay out of your hair, Thomas.”

Thomas only nodded as Alastair disappeared back behind his bedroom door.

Thanks for reading! Taglist (ask to be +/-): @stxr-thxif @chaos-and-starlight @zosiaenrique @lifewouldbebetteronmars @littlx-songbxrd @dianasarrow @eugeniaslongsword @bookswitchcraftandcats @jamesherondaleofficial @thomas-gaypanic-lightwood @livingformyself @anarmorofwords @foxglove-airmid @writeforjordelia @sapphic-in @jem-nasium @fortheloveofthecarstairs @alastair-esfandiyar-carstairs1 @shadowrunner2000 @thewarthatsavedmylife @fair-childd @itsjusta-j-really

[artificialqueens]

Sober (Symnali) - Pazinae

Summary: College girl Symone and her house love throwing parties. Denali loves a fun time, and finds herself there every weekend. Just to get drunk and party of course. No other reason. (AKA pretty lesbians in denial)

AN: a drabble inspired by denali coming over to the house of avalon a while ago, getting v drunk and dancing w symone (the outfit symone wears in the fic is from that day www.instagram.com/p/CODlQtnp-KM/ denali is wearing the pink dress from one of her older posts). also the time they streamed and were just drunkenly complimenting each other is the absolute Cutest and symnali is underrated. i have a lot of ideas for this so if yall are interested ill write a whole thing of what happened that night <3. my first fic and concrit is very much welcome!! song is sober by lorde :>

—

//Night, midnight, lose my mind

Night, midnight, lose my mind

Night, midnight, lose my mind

Night, midnight−//

They called themselves House Of Avalon. They had all pitched in to rent a house near campus over the summer, and a place leased for a year consisting of young 20 year olds can only go as well as you can imagine. Yet getting ready for their parties surrounded by constant noise and the dozens of paintings, framed photos, and tchotchkes lining the wall, was a comfortable kind of chaos. As chaotic as they may be, they undeniably threw the best parties. Not to mention their outfits never missed, especially not Symone.

The madness of creative, raging queers all shoehorned together to form the most disorderly harmony was a type of home Symone wanted to bask in forever, and, quite honestly, the driving reason to stay in the boring hell hole that is college. The obligation of finishing this shit for a flimsy paper and bragging rights was a little more grounded when it’s the only reason her friends are currently living with her. One day this will all be done, and they can find a job with their degrees. Finish college like everyone wants her too, make everyone proud that yes, she did it, and together the House Of Avalon can buy a huge house with 5 guest bedrooms so everyone and their mama can visit. Throw the biggest parties, a pool in their backyard with an outdoor kitchen, a huge patio out front by the house gates, and they could even install a stripper pole in the living room. Until then she’ll be up at 7:30am to ride the train for her morning class. 

The thought of the a certain dimpled blonde helped make the week bearable because at least on the weekends she can fly to somewhere else. With someone else. 

Symone, Gigi and Rosy hung around the sofa together, getting tipsy as they waited for more people to pour in. They chattered mindlessly, the comfort between the three was an indescribable kind, so effortless and familiar. But in between each pause in conversation, when the laughs and talk of annoying professors and ugly hair trends came to a brief end, Symone couldn’t help but scan the room. Peeking out the corner of her eye for a certain pair of hooded eyes hopefully lingering around. A girl with the most distinct, beautifully symmetric face that can charm a room, and a sugary voice so addictive to listen to even without a sweet tooth. She could listen to Denali talk and ramble as much as she wanted about anything in the world, and she’d eagerly nod along. Her hazy tone when she’s slurring and half awake, to the chirps and goofy grins at the height of the night. The adorable glint in her eyes of passion and excitement when she drunkenly goes off about some kpop group Symones never heard of before, but might just happen to start coming across more. Her dancing like a duck that makes Symone squeal, and cheer, and hide her face in her shoulder so no one can see the smile she’s unable to bite back. She dawdles around with her infectious giddiness and smile so comforting it eases the absurdity and rushing high Symone constantly lives with. And it helps that she’s built like some athlete godsend with the prettiest arms and perfect curves and the most stunning thighs and calves and soft warm blonde hair with icy blue tips to frame her angelic face. She’s been drinking and it’s definitely just the alcohol that makes her head waiver and ramble. 

Time rushes by wedged between her sisters, and soon Symone holds an empty cup for the second already. The house has certainly been getting fuller and fuller. Glancing around, she finds the only person she could (and frankly would) look at for all of eternity, staring at her. Denali’s hair is scooped into two high ponytails at either side, and her body’s fit into a little off the shoulder pink mini dress that hugged her body all too well. Symone wanted nothing more than to just hold her, dance the night away until the jumble of noises and bodies fade out. Seeing her just standing there, perfect and still, a toothy grin is plastered on Symone’s face without her consent. She barely even knows Denali but her sheer presence brightens the room, sends butterflies to flutter around like she’s having some cheesy school girl crush. She can’t tell you what Denali’s favorite TV show, movie or season is, or how she likes her coffee. But if the world were to close in on them right now, have the walls disintegrate, ceilings crumble and the heaps of flesh around them melt into the floorboards under them- they’d still be yelling out the wrong lyrics while they twirl against the counter tops. Rush outside and run in the pitch black where nothing exists but each other in their hands- and that’s good enough for her. 

Denali just likes Symone because she wants to have fun, and Symone’s good at that. It’s okay that she won’t ever like Symone when she’s sober; When she’s quiet, and wrapped in a blanket over her hoodie starring at the ceiling. When she’s fidgeting with her nails and playing with her the tips of her hair instead of talking. When she burns mac and cheese and decides to have a bag of ketchup chips for lunch. Whatever it is they have; it’s still good enough for her. 

Damn maybe Symone does think a little too much. She winks at the dumbstruck skater. The night’s just begun, and the only exit signs in the labyrinth in her sinkhole of a mind is alcohol and/or Denali. Symone wants the and version. 

//Oh, God, I’m clean out of air in my lungs

It’s all gone, played it so nonchalant//

When Denali came through the door she not-so-subtly headed straight to the living room. She had barely glanced in their direction- but she saw her. She was laughing, in her little squad of pretty girls. The clique of long legged doe-eyed queens stand in the center of the living room in their mini skirts and low waisted pants- lifelike statues seemingly taking up all the air in the crowded room. She can’t help it if she stares a bit! They have cute outfits and Denali just wants some inspiration. Everyone’s gawked at the trio anyways. She looks at Symone, because of the cute fuzzy blue bucket hat adorned on her head. No other reason.

 But it’s hard to look away when her face- her makeup is so stunning. With a shimmery pink cut crease, and glossy lips, and dabbles of pink brightening her cheeks. Lashes that make her eyes pop, and the highlight on her glistening skin matched with her flimsy silver spaghetti strap crop top that made her shine even more like a radiant disco ball. The backless top is tied together behind, with a thin string leaving the space between her neck to ass as exposed skin. How could a person be so perfect? And addicting to look at? Unzipped jeans hung at the curve of her hip to show her pink thong, which rose to hug her waist. Pink wedge heels lie under her painted toe nails, and fuck was she a living bratz doll. It wasn’t Denali’s fault that she was objectively so head to toe stunning. It wasn’t her fault that she bit the inside of her lip a litte. It wasn’t her fault that her heart skipped when she was bent over in laughter and cupping her manicured hands over her mouth. It wasn’t her fault that she forgot to look away. It wasn’t her fault that when Symone caught her gaze she stood there frozen  (if the options are fight, flight or freeze, which do you think the ice girl is gonna do?). It wasn’t her fault that she forgot how to breathe when the enchantress gave her a wink. She smiles and waves in return. Someone taps Symone’s shoulder for her attention, and she looks busy. 

Denali pushes away, swimming through the sea of humans swarming the halls until she can identify the way to the kitchen. She needs a drink. It’s early and she’s far too sober for this.

//It’s time we danced with the truth

Move along with the truth//

There’s no reason why she’d be into Denali. She could literally get anyone she wanted, with her gleaming smile and cute laugh, and the way she can make you smile and feel important and wanted. The way she stops sipping in her red solo cup to look at you, to nod at every word and stare like you’re beautiful and matter. The way it’s impossible for her to not be the prettiest in the room. Denali takes a shot, the burning taste a welcome pain at the back of her tongue.

Five months ago when Denali took a sharp breath outside the main door, she made Rose come with her because, fuck, she wasn’t going to a party by herself. Not back then, at least. When she was a flustered freshman in October who didn’t know how to have a good time. Back when she first met the party throwers, and a certain captivating spirit with braided honey gold hair in a skimpy black dress took shots with her. Complimented her wispy hair dyed blue at the ends. Told her she looked amazing in slurred giggles. Because she was tipsy. The truth is the only time this will mean anything is when the world starts spinning, the room gets hot, and their minds start to blur. 

//Ooh (Hey)

We’re sleepin’ through all the days

I’m actin’ like I don’t see

Every ribbon you used to tie yourself to me// 

“You good diva?“ 

"Nnnm, gimme uh ‘nother few minutes"  Symone’s head is pounding, and the only thing on her mind is the dazy blanketing warmth of sleep. Her mind is a knotted, jumbled up mess and trying to think about anything other than passing out makes her head throb. Natural light from the outside pours through the windows, and through her squinted eyes, the wooden table across the room is glowing from the suns heat. A vague need to eat, drink water, and vomit creep up on her. She turns to lay on her side, wedges the blanket between her arms, pulls it higher up and tucks her hands under her head.

"You sure?”

“You still have your makeup you want to wash it off?”

“We can take it off”

“Girl its 2pm" 

"Let her sleep!" 

Half asleep, all the different voices mesh as one blob of noise. Indistinct chatter fades as Symone slowly luls back to sleep. Until-

"Where should I put the polaroids of Symone and Denali making out?” Peaceful slumber is very quickly forgotten when realization is drawn. 

“What the fuck happened last night?” Is the only thing Symone can muster out before throwing her head deeper into the pillow, all of a sudden quite awake. Focusing on the vague mist of memories from the night before, she replays it through her head starting from when she went up to Denali, taking shots in the kitchen.

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

ah yeah, i think quarentine has given people some opportunity to actually just sit with the person they are, rather than be rushing around for the person they want to become. its good you got smth good out of isolation! ah thats great! hope you had fun and ur partner in crime speeds back home so you can get out more hehe.

ah yeah ty, good suggestions.

hmm good point, i was sort of putting it separate to the whole not-sexualising thing, but yeah. mmm yeah i totally agree, some of the enhypen fics/imagines *shudder* and even reading innie stuff is just a bit *icky* cos everyone still thinks of him as our agi ppang. yeah def would be good but sadly this just seems to be the world we live in. :(

ah yes the holy masterlist (not sarc) i have actually read in the rain and gladius maximus before, but ill go look for in class! oooh thats good! character development lol. hmmmm yes champagne problems was the angst to end all angst, that shit hurt. it was actually one of the first of your fics i read and i recall almost crying over the whole thing, it was so heartbreaking, i can see how it almost made you want to drop angst. good that youve allowed yourself some lee-way tho :)

hehe thats so cool. okay here we go, ill try not to be mortally offended (/hj)

cheese - yes same, i liked it but that was all there was, it wasnt a super standout track. it was rlly underwhelming for me but some of the hook is super catchy so there is Redemption (tm) in store for cheese maybe

thunderous - mmm, yeah at first i totally agreed, i think they suffer from too much good music syndrome, that all their other tracks are such fucking bops its hard to stay at that level of perfection. the choreo was beautiful tho and tbh, the track has grown on me since ive been watching all the vids abt it. its my brothers favourite track

domino - YES GODAMMIT IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE TITLE TRACK. the raps, the vocals, the vibes, the fucking domino sound in the back? i would have streamed that shit on repeat. but tbh, as good as it is, it doesnt have that sort of grandness/oomph that skz seems to like in their title tracks so i can see why they chose thunderous (tho domino would have been so good) *sigh*

ssick - yeah same, not my fave track by a long mile, the crowd cheering was a ?strange? choice and the chorus was a bit bare/empty, plus like i mentioned earlier, it was kinda funny to me for some reason but ill still play it if im playing thru the whole album

the view - ahh one of those not like other girls (/j) i honestly think its just a good party song, just a bop to play in the background when nobodys rlly paying much attention. its pretty generic pop music but catchy

sorry, i love you - hehe yeah i thought it was going to be sadder as well, but i rlly loved the fact that they all just got to sing, which almost never happens, i dont think ive heard felix sing for a long time, so i enjoyed it. wasnt rlly a standout track but i just casually like it. looking forward to the fic haha

silent cry - this song i swear, some bits are rlly good and then others are just? why?? it does sound like a dance song tho idk. definitely not one of my faves either

secret secret - YES its so good! its such a chill song and i love their vocals in it. the combination of lo-fi/fake strings backup stuff and their heavenly vocals just makes it *chefs kiss* im listening to it rn and just... its so beautiful. it gives me pumped up another day vibes ya know? like my pace is edgy get cool, this one is energetic another day i feel like. overall i love it

STAR LOST - ah thats so cool! i didnt know that! on first listen this song had a similar vibe to secret secret but then the beat came in and ahh its such a good song. i can totally imagine them putting this song to a concert footage vid, this song is so sweet.

red lights - LMAO YES ITS SO AWKWARD WHY DOES IT GO ON FOR SO LONG ah thats good! yeah good point, its quite intense hehe. but that is my fave trope and this is lowkey my favourite track on the album so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ just the combination of hyunjins and chans voices, the backing music, the lyrics ahh red lights my beloved

surfin’ - yes lmao its always a shock, i feel like they should have put gone away in between them, but its such a fun cute song, i cant get rlly mad. yeah, as an aussie i think im contractually obligated to like beaches lol. sand im not such a fan of, but my familys rlly into fishing and my brother loves bodyboarding so we stay at a beach house at least twice a year and we live like 5 mins from 3 different beaches (hehe all aussie cities are on the coast lol) so thats cool. do you like beaches?

gone away - ah gone away my beloved, i love this song sm, its just so pure and showcases their vocals and lyrics so well. yes the pitch change is very out of the blue, i feel liek they went directly from seungmins soft vocals to hans powerful ones which was an interesting choice, but hey, im not complaining

wolfgang - YES IKR ah im so happy he got to be included in that era and song. yeah its such a full on song i cant rlly listen to it if im in a quiet mood but its very motivating :)

hehe mood, i hope they do! ahhh no rest, but at least you wont have to pull a blink and wait a year for any word from the group lol. im not rlly into nct but im excited for them! ah hopefully youll be able to sneak some rest into that chaotic schedule, with enhypen (idk if u stan but yeah) squeezed into it haha

<3 w.a. 🐺

i wheezed at partner in crime, it reminded me of smth. i have a lee know fic in the drafts that i wrote 'in honor' of him (and his departure-ish). i'll tag you when i finish it, if you want. it's a rather hilarious one.

oh my god. based on my experience on the collabs i've joined before, writing explicit shit for '01 & '02 is not accepted (nct's maknaes) but with enha's hyung line '01 & '02 somehow it's okay? i do a double take every time i see fics like those i mean, technically, it's legal but still what the fuck. maybe it's just not for me at the moment. not at us venting our frustration about this. it's just something that's so accepted here that i am (in all honesty) slightly uncomfortable about. but oh well. that's kpop writerblr for you.

man i could've linked all the fics in the ask instead so you wouldn't have to go looking for them! i think i saw you like in class the other day (the fic i renamed into sharp-tongued, god it took me a while to remember the new title). describing champagne problems as an angst to end all angst is one way to put what i was feeling back in december. it just hurt to write and admit?? if that ever happened to me i would prolly cry :d

okay back to the album talk! i love how you answered with more thoughts. i love exchanges like these! i am a victim of the cheese hook and it's now one of my favorite tracks in the album. PLS, TOO MUCH GOOD MUSIC SYNDROME. that's on our self-producing kings 😌💅 also, your brother has taste! as i am typing this, domino's currently playing in my head and i realized that too, that it doesn't have that 'vibe' of a skz title track. honestly, this could be a title track of another group. ssick is starting to grown on me because i found the beats cool kdjsk not the not like other girls 😭 the view is the generic pop that i don't like but i get why a lot of people enjoy it. sorry i love you scratches a certain itch that i find myself singing the first few lines every time i remember it. i too would want to hear felix sing more!

> a mini junction on the album talk bc i got side tracked. on that topic, i want skz to switch positions at some point like i know those allrounders are capable of doing so. specifically, i want to hear seungmin rap!!!! (yk in the recent weekly idol he talked faster than changbin in a challenge and changbin is like the fastest rapper in kpop that's active atm if im not mistaken. my dandy boy has some potential and i want it UNLEASHED.)

back to album talk. silent cry is basically sad music to twerk to. secret secret is definitely one of my favorite tracks :( i loved how you compared the tracks HAJSAH i burst out laughing bc yk what, you're right! i want to make a star lost edit of skz but i simply do not have the time i want to cry. i love the song so much. ok, my dreaded track, red lights. idt i have played the track since we last talked. my friend sent me the lyrics tho and i'm itching to write a twisted au out of it. idk if you're comfortable with yandere but somewhere along those themes. the obsessive type of love that's sweet at first but turns rotten. IMAGINE IF THEY PUT GONE AWAY BETWEEN ASHJA it's like going from 50 shades to the notebook.

i was about to ask if you lived near the coast and you literally mentions it here god im so stupid. yes i LOOOOOOOOOVE beaches so much. living in an archipelago is fun :( i live in a part of the country that's more island than city so every time i want some vitamin sea it's accessible. i heard the waves in australia are great :( anYWHOOO gone away :(( every time it plays im compelled to skip it because it makes me sAD AND NOWADAYS I DONT HAVE THE TIME TO BE SAD. contrary to you, i dislike my quiet moods because i tend to overthink a lot.

i have this little analogy about how there are stays that enjoy songs the generic pop + mellow songs and then there are other stays that enjoy the noisy tracks. in my mind, it's like a perfect balance that makes me feel like all the tracks are loved in the end. just by different people.

PULL A BLINK. bro i fucking hate yg entertainment. they have the biggest kpop girl group LOCKED in their basement when they could be (and i mean this in the most business-like way not morally) milking money of the quad. they're yg's biggest hope at not being bankrupt atm so it's a damn fucking mystery to me as to how they aren't doing anything. (jk i just realized lisa solo album soon, but i still need a ot4 cb hELLO)

i stopped looking forward to the teasers. rest > kpop boys. i don't want to sound like a cult member but have you tried checking out nct? are they just not your thing? (i get it tho, that's one hard group to get into). and yes i do stan enhypen!

wow i love how long these asks are! they're like online penpals. but i also want to ask about you! how have you been lately? are you feeling okay both mentally and physically? how's the weather there? do you have anything that you want to talk about? maybe an interesting book you read? feel free to bring up anything you want to share! i'm getting conscious about talking about myself HAJHSJ

and yet another long answer B) i am sooo sorry T___T should these ask exchanges feel draining to you, feel free to stop sending them in AAAA

[smolbeandrabbles]

Try It On, Take It Off - Orson Krennic x Reader (Rogue One)

100 Sentence Challenge Request

Orson Krennic + 95 -  “Have I mentioned, I fucking hate Halloween.” Requested by @mysticaltimemachinewench

Author’s Note: Roll with the idea of Halloween and October 31st being things in the Star Wars universe just for this fic, please! This boy is so whiny, I spent all week writing for him last week and he’s still like “write more!” so, I thought I’d post one. It’s because he’s all the bottom of my drafts now I’m sure of it. Boots & Boys - Kesha  Okay, so I was looking for songs to do with dressing up. And I found a bunch of cute love songs about wearing your SOs clothing, but... This one is fun and I needed fun for the premise-!

Disclaimer: Rogue One Characters/SW Universe not mine. / Requested  premise / lyrics & gifs not mine.

Premise: Every Halloween it’s the same thing, and Krennic is sick of people dressing like him. This year he’s determined to get to the bottom of things...

Words: 2010

Warnings: Swearing / Sexual connotations/Pre-Amble

_____

Think it's time that I mention I've got myself an obsession For the smell, for the touch I know I've got myself a habit But I gotta have it now I don't care where, work it out Let me break it down I try it on, I take it off So what you got? Something 'bout boots and boys They bring me so much joy I gotta say I wear 'em both so pretty as I walk in the city Give me boots and boys I'm keeping quite the collection Take nothing less than perfection My men drop beats like a bomb Wind me up, spin me round Oh, lookie what I found (ooh!) I'm crazy for you, crazy for you Hey hey, whatcha looking at? Hey hey, something you can't have They've got me looking rad You feeling that?

---

October 31st was always a date Krennic hated seeing in his calendar. The Death Star had not been a project spanning months by any stretch of the imagination. Orson was many, many years into this – and he was now accustomed to his workers Halloween traditions. He couldn’t say it wasn’t one of the reasons he was glad that it was nearing completion. That, and he might finally get the recognition he deserved. At least for now he had you. Given, you were relatively new to the project when he looked at the timeline as a whole, but you were certainly a necessary piece – and Krennic actually liked you. A lot of the other employees, if he were honest with himself, he actually could have done without. Which is probably why you’d grown close – and then maybe a little too close. But Orson wasn’t going back on that now. This was the day Krennic didn’t want to leave his office – inevitably, it was also the day that everyone would have him chasing all over the structure. Why? Oh, because they all knew how much he hated today too! So as soon as the email pinged in from the other side of the Death Star, Krennic tried everything he could to get them to come to him, or to send him documents, pictures, anything that meant he didn’t have to go on an annoyingly long walk. Orson used practically every persuasive trick in the book, to no avail. Eventually he had to concede rising from his desk, sighing angrily, and gathering his things to head to the problem. Almost immediately he was assaulted with the kind of visuals he’d become accustomed to. It seemed every other person on this damned vessel took today to dress up as him. Now, whilst dressing in the full white Intelligence Bureau tunic would have been against protocol and would have meant he could reprimand them, everyone decided to wear capes of various different colours instead. Some, like his, matched their uniforms – and if it wasn’t also for the fact they copied the way he walked and carried himself, with an unconvincing attempt at his accent and speech patterns, he’d find it quite tasteful. Krennic would almost be flattered, he supposed - perhaps even feel like a trend setter – had the crew not being doing it for any other reason than to mock him. God forbid any of them attempt Lexrulian; one day it was going to make his ears bleed. Others decided to wear their ‘capes’ in the gaudiest colours imaginable, and sometimes Orson felt like he was going to be physically ill just staring at them.

Still, technically all of this was against regulation – and although he probably couldn’t take on the entire staff and win, he took pleasure in chastising those he disliked most. “Isn’t that a little against your uniform regulation?” “Take that off now – before I have you reported.” “Next time I catch you in something like this, you’re off the project.” Annoyingly, he could never keep how irked he was out of his voice – and they took great joy out of that, and never bothered hiding it. When they did take these ridiculous attempts at mocking him off (Though it worked. He supposed.), Krennic knew they’d be pulled back on before he rounded the next corner – but for now at least, Orson could be smug in his little bit of power. The fact he could actually force the crew to remove them. He often pondered how this started. Tarkin, he had no doubt. Krennic wasn’t going to blame himself after all, he knew his uniform looked damn good. He just wasn’t fool enough to think this was respectful admiration. Eventually he reached the person who emailed him and, as predicted, it was an easy fix that Krennic could have done in less than five minutes on his tablet back in his office. The Director almost punished them on the spot for that, but by this time was already too pissed off with the situation to trust himself not to lose complete control. Not that that didn’t happen a lot, especially when everything was stalling – but today that was what everyone wanted. ‘If I see another bad attempt at ridiculing my uniform I’ll scream…’  Orson’s jaw was beginning to ache with the way he was tightening it. Half way back to his office, Krennic took a detour. By now he really was yelling at people – Orson was this close to drawing weapons and kicking them off the station, Project Stardust be damned. Desperately seeking respite, he wandered back to his quarters and as the corridors began to quieten, scuffled along in his boots, sulking. ‘What did I ever do to deserve this-!?’ Reaching the door to his room, Krennic gave a small smile – he would receive relief in here. Well at least she will be sweet... I can tell her my frustrations and she’ll sympathize… As Krennic keyed himself in and the door slid open, he realised just how wrong he could be. You were walking up and down the main room and studying yourself in about every reflective surface you could find. If this wasn’t you, Krennic would have blown it, and immediately all his irritations came flooding back. You were, of course – with access to his wardrobe - pacing around in his uniform. Full Intelligence white, rank bar included. Sure, the sleeves were rolled up – which pained him because it’d take an age to get those creases out - and the cape was a little long for you, but, you had the whole thing on, right down to the boots. Usually Krennic might smirk and call you out on wearing his clothes, after all you did look good in his tailored shirts. Any other day of the week he’d probably be pretty turned on right now. But NOT today. As the door slid closed behind him and beeped locked, you whirled around. The cape moved with you and your eyes fell to it; immediately distracted. Krennic’s uniform was gorgeous on him, but the feeling of power you got when wearing it for yourself was indescribable. You liked running your hands over it – the feeling of the fabric between your fingers very nearly bordering obsessive with your need to do it at every chance you could; it was so perfectly weighted that, in all honesty, the tailoring was a marvel to you. You always made a mental note to thank the designers and sewers for their impeccable work. (On Orson’s entire wardrobe, actually.) “Director.” You presented yourself and looked back to him, “What do you think?” Orson very nearly shivered, and if he wasn’t so pissed he’d probably have let himself. That was Lexrulian – and compared to everything else he’d heard today, was very nearly music to his ears. “What are you doing-!?” There was a snap in the undertone of his voice – agitated, to match the way his jaw tightened. You answered cheerily, nonetheless. “It’s Halloween. So, I’m you! I mean you could be me if you wanted, but I’m not sure the uniform would fit-!” You giggled slightly at the mental image of him in your tight black jacket – no, maybe it wouldn’t fit properly, but it might look really good. If only for a second. Although Krennic was glaring at you by now. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me, is all this YOUR idea-!?” For a moment you looked innocent, “No! You mean the fact everyone else does it? I didn’t start it, but I felt I could damn well finish it. Besides, LOOK!, I can do it better than everyone else!” “No! No! Y/N-!” You scrambled up onto the table, and cleared your throat. It was clear to Krennic you’d been practicing, because you had his stance down and his mannerisms almost perfect. He was almost impressed. “The POWER we are dealing with here is immeasurable! Single reactor ignition would be just an inkling of it’s true destructive potential! And I will not fail!” He blinked slowly, thinking you were mixing up at least three of his previous conversations there. There was a long pause before Krennic stepped forward, pointing at you. “GET. DOWN! Do you have any idea how expensive that table was-!?” “Awwww, Orson, c’mon!!” “I’m NOT impressed, GET DOWN!” “Baaabe.” “Don’t whine..!” You backed up just out of his reach, even your best innocent eyes weren’t saving you today – he must have been furious. “But it took me so long, I’ve tried on all the variants, I tried on your dress uniform even-! And it isn’t complete without the cape, and the rain one doesn’t have a patch on the glory of this one!! I thought it wouldn’t drag if I put on my heeled boots, but that didn’t get the look right either! And it’s you – so, it had to be perfect…” Your eyes glittered gently as you tried to plead with him, “I thought if I did it properly, it might make you smile. That it might be more… respectful. I dunno I-” He cut you off, demanding, “OFF. THE. TABLE.” “Well, what are you gonna do-!?!” Krennic was quick on his feet, and even though you’d backed yourself up he still managed to grab your wrist and drag you down. You might have been in his uniform, but you were nowhere near his height; and you might have had his traits down, but you didn’t have his strength either. Meaning within seconds he had you shoved up against a wall – with a squeak – before his lips were on yours, wrists pinned by your sides. He might have been angry, but that only made this kiss hotter, and you practically melted into him. Orson was showing you absolutely no mercy – and you weren’t sure if you really deserved it, but you were at least a little glad of it. Eventually he pulled away from you; leaving you gasping and panting for breath. But you whined, wanting more from him. “Have I mentioned, I fucking hate Halloween.” Krennic had, many a time. Which is one of the reasons you wanted to do this, because he might feel a little better if you were doing it right. Clearly you were in the wrong ballpark. You thought about nodding in admittance, but thought maybe continuing to be playful would get you what you wanted. “Don’t think you did – maybe you did. You should remind me.” “Oh, I think I will.” His smirk was back as you let him run his hands through the fastenings of the tunic and unzip your pants. Oh, yeah, he wanted this uniform off bad. You bit your lip, “It does look sexy on you though, is it surprising everyone wants to copy it? I mean I like trying it on and taking it off.” Orson nipped your neck, eliciting a gasp from you; “Evidently I might too.” Then he chuckled at your sigh, running his hands over your warm skin, “That doesn’t make me hate today any less. I mean it’s hardly tribute, is it?” You tipped your head, “I mean, I tried.” “Oh, don’t think I didn’t hear that mocking tone.” He grazed his lips to yours, and it was hardly rewarding, you pined for more but he held you away from him – still immobilized against the wall, “Still, I’ll admit so much… you do look very pretty in white.” You did very nearly blush, but knew that his mind wouldn’t be going to something as virtuous as weddings or dresses; probably a different kind of white lace altogether. “Can I keep the cape at least?” Maybe he’d enjoy you wearing that and very little else. That would be like a ‘sexy’ Halloween costume, would it not? Even if it was just for him. Maybe that’s what Krennic needed if he detested today so much. He growled, kissing you again before you let him slide the jacket from your shoulders and it fell to the floor; “If you’re good, we’ll see.”

--- Thank you very much for reading! It’s been a while since Krennic has been posted too, I’ll admit! 🙏❤

2/16 down!

[clumsyclifford]

6, 12, 14, 15, & 21 for the writing asks? -megs 💙

hachi machi okie dokie how many more nonsense rhymes can i say ok that's it great let's go

6. What fic is on your back burner, waiting to be written when you feel your skill matches its potential? answered this one here! i'm SURE there are more though let me check my fic ideas doc (fun fact my fic ideas doc is still called "Malum fic ideas:" from back in the early days of this blog when i was chiefly writing malum because of helen). oh! well. the major league baseball au is still uh, kinda back burner-y. that's another one that i started and then ran face first into a wall known as The Wall of Trying To Realistically Represent A Situation I've Never Been In But Also Include Romance Which Would Not Typically Exist In This Setting So I'm Really Setting Myself Up For Failure Here it's a really annoying wall i know hazel hits it too so i'm just ignoring it for the moment. i also think a castaways fic (the concept, not the song) would be really awesome but tricky because, once again, i've never actually BEEN a castaway, and my knowledge of the topic is pretty heavily based on the book hatchet so like. yeah. i have a lot.

12. Where do you commonly find inspiration for your stories? everywhere! i saw in your answer you said you hear song lyrics and think they'd make good fic titles, i do EXACTLY the same thing (hence the doc "good lyrics for titles"). one day ill make that doc into a prompt list and post it on here and just fuck myself over. previously ive gotten some inspiration from movies but i shortly after completing baby driver au i realized that was a fluke and that in general i am pretty bad at making fics out of movie plots because i am very bad at remembering salient details about movies in the order that they happen. like i started a robin hood (2018) au but barely got anywhere with it because i realized i had never actually understood the plot well enough to write it. i would say the things that inspire me the most are songs (we know i loooove a songfic, mostly bc they make the job so easy by just laying out the plot and vibe for me) and also things that happen to me and feelings i have about those things. unfortunately many of my experiences are not universal (hello jewish summer camp) which may be part of why i've had so much trouble coming up with ideas lately. but as soon as i'm back at school i get the feeling i'll be doing fine again.

14. Share a few sentences of what you’re currently working on? what AM i currently working on? technically speaking i'm kinda sorta working on two things but one of them just doesn't have a good snippet and i don't wanna do a Reveal yet so ill give you this one instead, from a fic i might never even post:

“Oh, I meant to tell you, my mum called earlier, she asked if you’re okay.” Ashton’s mum always asks if Luke is okay. Exactly that way, is Luke doing okay?, like Luke gives off some kind of not-doing-okay vibe. He suspects it’s a leftover instinct from his and Ashton’s mutual breakdown a few years back, but honestly, he’s doing better now. It’s sweet of her to ask, but she could just ask about him the same way she asks about Michael and Calum. How’s Luke? would be fine.

“I am great,” Luke says. “How’s she? Is she okay?”

“Yeah, she’s okay,” Ashton says. “She’s started taking Harry to look at some universities.” He pauses. “University. You know? What the fuck?”

“No way,” Luke says, and tries to work out if he’s meant to be surprised by that. He can’t remember how old Harry is. Clearly almost uni-age. Ashton’s told him this a million times, but Luke can’t keep track when the answer keeps changing. He doesn’t want Ashton to think he’s forgotten, so he just says, “That’s insane.”

15. What are some of your favorite tropes to write? Do they match the ones you read? answered this one here as well! i've managed to get unbelievably long-winded answering every single one of these questions so far so i won't write another answer for this one

21. Do you have any stories you’ve written completely but never posted? Why? Please tell us about them? yes!! i have a handful. let me hunt them down. okay final answer, i have five!

one is an au based on the prompt "we’re at a party and someone asks what your type is and you describe me perfectly while staring right at me” which i never posted because i wrote it a while ago and honestly i don't think it's good enough to post. also i kinda don't like the background character i made jack barakat. i could edit it. but. ehh

one is a fic that is set in the daydream jalex fic 'verse, but the only way it's relevant to that 'verse is because it has ace!jack, and it's highly personal and probably the most projection-heavy fic i've ever written and i never posted it because i'm nervous to be Known like that lol

one is technically emo lashton, but not actually set in the emo lashton 'verse that i've created, and that one is ALSO one of the most projection-heavy fics i've ever written. it's usually the fics that are full of projection but in a specific way that i think isn't really relatable that i write but don't end up posting. it's a good fic honestly i wouldn't be against posting it i just never have. also partially because i'm between two titles for that fic lol

one is.......something that was originally going to be set in a different fic universe (for a fic i havent posted or finished writing lol), but now i don't know if it will necessarily fit in that 'verse, so it's kind of its own very short but complete thing. i never posted it because (1) it's super short, less than 1k, and i don't like to post stuff that short, and also (2) just in case it DOES fit the fic 'verse, i don't wanna give away the ending, lmao

and lastly there's a fic i wrote in an excited haze when sam and meghna and i made the ssf and the aces plans, which is like, ot4 meeting but they're all internet friends. guess what inspired that. i'll never post it because it really wasn't written with the intention of posting it, i sent it to sam and meghna and they were the only people i wanted to read it and they have so <3

writing asks

[writsgrimmyblog]

Rec List #1 Theme: 2018 Favourites

One of my fandom resolutions is to rec more in 2019. I’m going to post rec lists for some of my favourite Nick fics divided up by theme/content/ship or whatever I fancy throughout the year. It seems fitting that my first rec post of 2019 should be my favourite Nick Fics of 2018. If you’re interested in my Harry Potter themed recs, you can find them over on my other blog @writcraft under the tag #writ recs where I’m undertaking the same initiative.

This is by no means an exhaustive list - I’m limiting myself to ten recs per list and it is very difficult, I could have recced many more. I’ve read and enjoyed a whole raft of terrific stories and this rec list is simply based on my personal tastes which may not be everybody else’s cuppa. Please heed the content warnings the author has flagged on AO3 in each case, none of my recs include the content tags.

#1. Ten Track Sophomore Album by @junkshop-disco​ 

Nick Grimshaw/Harry Styles | 4,228

Nick has always lived in noise, been the cause of a lot of it, but one day a boy writes him into a pop song and the whole world dissolves into static.

It doesn’t happen like that, not that easy, not that linear, but that’s the heart of it, the soul, if these things have such a thing.

My Rec: The Nick fic of 2018 is undoubtedly the final installment of junkshop-disco’s incredible Doodle of a Surface Life but that has quite rightly garnered so many recs by now if any Gryles reader hasn’t yet indulged, run, quick, what are you waiting for? I love DOASL with all of my heart, but I’m also a sucker for angst and I wanted to highlight this equally terrific fic in my rec list. The structure of this story, in which Nick loses his ability to hear music, is so cleverly done. It’s a very skilled writer that can create an entire fic around sound and make it come alive, and junkshop-disco manages it brilliantly. The fic reads like music, even as it describes the absence of it and it’s a stunning piece of writing. If you like your Gryles contemplative and angsty with confident, lyrical prose, this is the one for you. Junkshop-disco has such a terrific way with words I highly recommend reading all the works by this author. Every single one. But when you do make sure you take a moment to stop by this beautiful story and leave it all the love it deserves.

#2. Tell Me It’s The Strongest Shape by @louandhazaf

Nick Grimshaw/Elgar Johnson/Louis Tomlinson | 73,224

Nick and Elgar have it all. They’re famous, successful, and engaged to be married—and sometimes they play with others.

When uni student Louis gets street cast by Elgar for a GQ photoshoot, he's drawn into Nick and Elgar’s complicated relationship.

They've always invited mates into their bed. It doesn’t ever mean anything. Until… it does.

My Rec: This is such a great exploration of polyamory and the complexities of open relationships, and the author took a great deal of time developing the relationships between the characters and really working on highlighting some of those difficulties. I tend to gravitate towards fanfic where I care deeply about the characters, and although Elgar seems terrific I don’t have the same fannish relationship to him as I do to Nick and Louis so I was curious to know how I would respond to this fic. Basically, the author killed it. I felt such a deep investment in Elgar, Nick and Louis throughout and everything just flew by as I was reading. It’s also really fucking hot. Like, REALLY. Brilliantly done. I loved it. 

#3. Let The Boys All Sing And The Boys All Shout For Tomorrow by @lunarrua​

Nick Grimshaw/Harry Styles | 18,429

It's February 1988. Thatcher is in power. There's a new drug sweeping through the clubbing scene. In Manchester, it's the eve of a major protest and a new musical movement. And when Nick finds Harry looking lost outside his favourite chip shop, it's the start of a weekend that will leave an indelible mark on both their lives.

My Rec: I saw the summary for this fic and actually yelled at my screen when it popped into my inbox. Gryles, set in Manchester in the 80s? Hell yes. The fic itself certainly didn’t disappoint, it’s absolutely beautiful. The author writes a well-researched, confident piece and the result is stunning. The atmosphere of the whole story is captivating and you can feel yourself transported to the heady days before the Manchester music scene shifted, the anxieties of the AIDS crisis and the fragility of the relationships formed during that period. The Harry of this fic has a transient quality which evokes the nostalgic reflection on a different time in our not so distant past. A real triumph. I loved this story with my whole heart. 

#4. Séjour by @silveredsound

Nick Grimshaw/Louis Tomlinson | 6,288

It is so quiet, which should be conducive to concentration, but Nick is bored and listless and lonely. He’s been there for two days and wants to know where the helpful lady is who’ll deliver him a gamine but takes-no-shit housekeeper who he can fall in love with without words. Words are not his friend.

“Where is my Love Actually moment?” he asks the ceramic kitchen sink as he pokes holes in the cover of one of the M&S ready meals he brought over with him.

«≠»

Nick’s got writer's block. Louis is a master of distraction.

My Rec: I’ve loved a number of stories by Silv this year and I was swinging back and forth between this and others, but there’s something about this little fic that has wormed its way into my heart and has taken hold so this is the one I’m choosing. As I said in my earlier reblog rec, this has such lush, evocative prose it perfectly captures the sense of a fleeting summer. There’s a seductive quietness to it, and a lovely unfolding of the story through snippets of tasting notes left by Louis on bottles of wine and Nick feeling a little bit lost and searching for words as he struggles with writer’s block. Two boys find one another in the warmth of a sleepy French town and it’s beautiful. Really wonderfully done.

#5. Fists & Flowers ‘Verse by @jiksax

Nick Grimshaw/Harry Styles | 1,613 (Make It Worse) and 2,322 (I’ll Do What You Like (If You Stay The Night)

He’s looking at Nick with that soft, terrible look in his eyes, the look that tells Nick the two of them are probably something.

My Rec: If anyone other than Jiksa had told me they were planning an angsty fisting fic series I would have been like umm really? But of course, it’s Jiksa, so naturally I found myself sobbing at the raw, devastating intensity of the story. Jiksa deftly weaves the intensity of the physical act itself into the emotional tumult of Harry and Nick’s relationship in a way that’s incredibly beautiful. A bold, brave, superb piece of hot, confident writing, rich with emotional complexity. Gorgeous.

#6. Constantly on the Cusp by @shiftylinguini

Nick Grimshaw/Louis Tomlinson | 6169

It’s 5 in the morning, and Nick’s got an alarm going off, an unexpected bed full of pop star, and a nation to wake up.

It’s far too fucking early for this.

My Rec: UNFFFFF. I love Shifty’s writing. Like, an obsessive amount. I was so thrilled when Shifty started writing Tomlinshaw I didn’t know quite what to do with myself. It’s actually hard to believe this was Shifty’s first Tomlinshaw, because everything about the fic felt like they have been writing them for years. Louis is sleepy, horny and pissed off, Nick is awake, horny and wondering what it all means, and together they have this scorching hot, sexy moment. Nick’s internal monologue  gives us so much insight into their relationship and the fic offers a lovely, warm, hopeful moment at the end. Fantastically written and a sexy delight from start to finish. Loved it!

#7. this cookie’s baking by @disgruntledkittenface 

Nick Grimshaw/Harry Styles (Genderswap Femslash) | 8,148

Harry’s eyes flicker between Nick’s eyes and lips. “I just want to be your–”

“Baby,” Nick says softly, cupping Harry’s jaw, “you already are.”

Nick and Harry have a long-overdue conversation.

My Rec: This was the first genderswap Gryles fic I have read and I absolutely loved it. The relationship between Nick and Harry feels so perfectly them and there’s a lovely warmth to the whole story. It’s light and funny but also contains moments of real emotional depth and those first time explorations and the hesitancy of admitting to being something more than friends is handled in such a terrific way. It’s a gorgeous story with wonderful writing and I loved every minute of reading it.

#8. let’s make some new rules by @camiii 

Nick Grimshaw/Louis Tomlinson | 12,743

A coffee shop, a Christmas party & a fake date to make sure no one gets laid at the end of the night.

My Rec: This was such an enjoyable read. I love camiii’s Tomlinshaw, and seeing this pop up was a wonderful surprise. Barista Louis agrees to be Nick’s fake boyfriend as he pines over an ex that definitely isn’t worth his time, and they become closer in the process. The pace of the story is wonderful, the flirting is brilliant and despite some misunderstandings and Nick’s no good ex trying to fuck things up, the ending is warm and hopeful. A lovely story, full of festive cheer. Thoroughly enjoyable.

#9. I’ll be seeing you by @daretomarvel​ / renlyne

Nick Grimshaw/Harry Styles | 11,481

It’s 2028, and Nick’s bought a house.

My Rec: I love Ren’s writing and this Notebook inspired Gryles is a beautiful treat of a story, in which Nick starts buying little bits for his dream house. It’s hard to believe this story is just over 11,000 words because the world the author creates is so rich, detailed, layered and complex. The relationship between Nick and Harry has all of these gorgeous details and nuggets of history as it grows and develops, seedling-like, into something that might just be everything they’ve both been searching for. It’s a warm, hopeful, beautiful story but as it’s Ren, it manages to still tug at the heartstrings in the best kind of way. I read this again as I was putting my rec list together and did so with a lump in my throat, full of feels for the Nick and Harry of Ren’s universe. Gorgeous writing with bags of emotional intensity. I loved it.

#10. All I’ve ever had are love songs by @candybarrnerd / icarusinflight

Nick Grimshaw/Louis Tomlinson | 21,688

Things are finally coming together for Nick.

Nick is the DJ of his uni's radio stations, and he passively aggressively dedicates a song to Louis.

My Rec: Icarusinflight is another author who was already on my periphery from Harry Potter fandom who wrote their first Tomlinshaw fic this year and I was so thrilled to see them writing in this fandom and I’m very excited about their upcoming 2019 projects which also includes fics featuring the 1D boys in various ship combos. I love uni AUs and I hadn't read one for a while, so this was such a treat. I loved how Louis is sharp, sassy and confident but with niggling insecurities. Harry was so affectionately humorous in this story and Nick’s voice is wonderful. This is a really well-paced, enjoyable story with a hot af first kiss that deserves a mention all of its own. The music references, the tea and the cameos from various 1D members are all terrific and the writing is brilliant. Can’t wait for more from this author this year.

Bonus Rec: I was meant to limit this to just 10 recs but I also wanted to give a quick shout out to @nightwideopen. I’ve said this in previous rec lists before, but I am constantly impressed by the quality of @nightwideopen‘s writing and the way they explore things such as asexuality and gender dysphoria which can be harder to find in a relatively small fandom. I’d particularly rec so far (it’s alright) and i’ve been thinking lots about your mouth from this year, both Tomlinshaw.

[brazenautomaton]

Now that Silent Partner, Unfinished Business is complete, it’s time for answers and trivia and commentary and other such spoilers under a readmore! Send me an ask if you have any other questions about stuff, or post it as an AO3 comment.

First, the chapter titles. Following the naming convention of 100 Bullets, each of them references or alludes to the chapter number that it is.

One Is The Lowliest Number - references “One Is The Loneliest Number” by Three Dog Night. 

Folie a Deux - “Folie a Deux” or “Madness of Two” is when people transmit psychiatric illness, delusions, or hallucinations through social connection.

Bad Company - references the phrase “Three’s company, four’s a crowd” - and “Bad Company”, by Bad Company, on the album Bad Company.

Forewarned is Foreboding - references the phrase “Forewarned is Forearmed”

Slaughterhouse - references “Slaughterhouse-Five” by Kurt Vonnegut

Six Degrees of Severance - references the concept of “Six Degrees Of Separation”, and the process of severing a connection.

Magnificent - references the classic Western “The Magnificent Seven”.

Termination Procedure - AKA “Termin8ion Procedure”, it’s the process you go through to end someone’s employment.

Never A Cloudy Day - September is the ninth month of the year, "September” by Earth Wind And Fire contains the lyric “Say do you remember / Dancing in September / Never was a cloudy day”.

Epilogue: Decision - Deci-, as in decimal, is the Latin prefix meaning ten or tenth. 

I wrote the first version of this story over 10 years ago. I wrote myself into a corner in Chapter 5, because the Yotsuba Kira was still Higuchi, and it lay untouched for a decade. Naomi could write fluently and at length, her relationship with Misa was way easier, everything else was way easier, and it honestly wasn’t that good. I think like 1/3rd of chapters 1 through 4 are made up of text from the old version?

The idea of this being a fix fic to bring back a character that the narrative shortchanged was not the first idea. The first idea was “100 Bullets and Death Note ask exactly the same question, what would you do if you could kill someone and get away with it. But they answer it in totally different ways. How could those two concepts meet? Well, who in Death Note was betrayed and would seek revenge? Naomi Misora is a good candidate. How do I bring her back to life in a way that doesn’t seem she got off scot free?”

The original version of the story had no hints about the Minutemen (or the Trust, L’s employers) because none of that stuff was in the 100 Bullets comic yet, or at least not the trade paperbacks I had access to. The Minutemen and the Trust are kind of lame, to be honest, and they kinda dilute the elements and stories that made 100 Bullets compelling, but they are a perfect match for all the unanswered questions about L that Ryuzaki vocalizes in chapter 6.

You probably noticed how everyone had to stammer and search for the word “aphasia”. Did you notice that Misa was the only one who ever correctly used the word, had it immediately called to mind, and wasn’t reading it off a piece of paper? She was thinking about that word a lot more than everyone else.

I don’t remember when I first started using the double-slash notation for written text, but I figured that calling out written text was extremely, extremely important in a story where written text is extremely, extremely important for multiple reasons. I don’t know if I’ll use it for anything else I write.

Light’s symbolic fruit is the apple, obviously. Naomi is seen drinking orange juice and eating orange-flavored things, because they are as dissimilar as apples and oranges. Misa -- stuck between them and unsure of whose identity she will adopt -- drinks a lot of spring water.

“Midland Carbide Labs” and “Amalgamated Flourodynamics” are the two opposing player teams in the Half-Life mod “Science and Industry”, where players abduct scientists from each other to research their weapons.

Beta reader @ellieintheskywithroxy is a qt3.14.

Misa did a photoshoot, as a Malkavian vampire schoolgirl, for White Wolf Publishing back in the day. She thinks that White Wolf owns vampires the same way the Tolkien estate owns hobbits, so any changes they make to their setting are Official Vampire Changes, and she was miffed they got rid of Masquerade. Depending on her mood she thinks Naomi is either a Brujah or a Toreador.

Light’s “decoy Kira” plan was going to explode if it ever got to the point where he commanded or tricked Kira-Y into giving up his memories -- Nabiki Egawa would remember everything and they’d figure out Kira’s deception real fast.

The fact that Light’s WoW character is a Holy Paladin who he did not earn but instead purchased illicitly is extremely intentional. He plays WoW instead of a made-up game because A: I can cite details and people will appreciate the deep pulls and B: if I made up my own online game with a character as completely braindead easy to play as a Holy Pally in Burning Crusade, to allow Light to type messages while playing, it would look like I was making up absurd nonsense to make things easy on the character.

Naomi’s reaction to the BB case mirrors my own. I honestly could not finish the light novel because I found the authorial voice so grating, and the combination of smugness with the complete lack of knowledge about how things work in the setting of the story (literally one of the first things in the narration is something along the lines of “Of course her superiors were demeaning her, she was a woman and Japanese and this was America and we don’t need to go into any more detail than that”) was infuriating. And in the story that is supposed to be Naomi’s time to shine, she accomplishes nothing, saves no one, may as well not have gotten out of bed, and the things we’re supposed to see as her being a genius are her ability to follow along the clues that she is being spoon-fed by the actual serial killer. Jesus, dude. I said this whole incident gave her an incredible sense of impostor syndrome and hatred for her job, because the rest of the world -- like the LN itself -- acts like she accomplished something when she clearly did not. 

Similarly, I changed the details of Misa’s confinement to make sense. On someone else’s post, someone asked if Misa was tortured -- the depiction of her treatment is so inconsistent and incoherent that this is impossible to answer in the canon. They say she was denied water for three days, but has none of the symptoms of it. They have her bound a to gurney apparatus that takes twenty minutes to set up, and let her out every single time she asks to pee, and somehow she never tries to escape. And of course she gets out after a month of not moving with no muscle atrophy. This version is supposed to be a coherent model of treatment that sits on the borderline, in a grey area -- it’s torture if it’s done to inflict pain, and not torture if it’s done out of a reasonable concern for safety. The Second Kira was the most dangerous human being on the planet Earth and they had no idea how she worked. Some of her confinement was obviously necessary for the sake of safety. But how much of it was, and for how long was it warranted?

Most of the new Death Note rules are introduced to set up things that happen later, answer niggling questions I had, or just flesh out the concepts introduced. But the rule about “Once your lifespan goes negative, if you try to update it again, it just flips the fuck out” is just so Naomi and Misa can’t know how much lifespan Rem gave them.

There was no good or natural time to show it, but the moment Misa heard about rule 38a, which says that you can only regain your memory of the Death Note six times, she figured out if it was possible to surrender a Death Note that wasn’t being actively haunted (it was), she just reclaimed and gave up an evidence sheet of //ARVC-5// five more times.

Ryuzaki has no idea where the pina coladas are coming from and at this point he is too afraid to ask.

[beanyboobee]

Far longer than forever. PRINXIETY fanfic

This is literally a lyric fic.

((EEEEYYY BACK AT IT AGAIN WITH THE 2AM FANFICS! lowkey the 2 dialogue part in one was a pain in the butt to read, but i hope yall enjoy,

((i decided. fuck it. the only way im going to get this out of my head is to write it, cause no way in hell am i gonna draw it. a divided line. means switch in pov

WARNING:this is my first lyric fic, so i apologize if it isn't well done))

The night was clear, a strangely warm breeze lingering in the air, as though it was celebrating a summers night, only- it wasn’t summer. It was Winter. What a strange thing it would be, to those who were not used to this place, for you see, it was an area of cleared forest land, hidden by a barrier, and controlled by the over-seer. 

The over-seer being the man who created this place, and trapped another man with-in it’s walls. In hopes of separating him as well as his lover. Keeping the lover trapped outside, and telling Deceitful lies to the man with-in, feeding him such cruel falsehood of the reason why he was here... however the over-seer, never anticipated who he was playing with, and how strong and determined they really are..and how- when something important is taken from them, how much stronger, they would become.

welcome to the beginning... now let us begin, not at the beginning- and not quite at the end, but just enough in and out of where the story really takes off, the limbo. if you will.

(Beginning with Virgil’s point of veiw)

A sigh befalls the quite clearing, the moon casting a beautiful glow through the trees, before it managed to reach the dancing ripples of water below, creating a broken image of light, as it reflected back above the surface.

A pair of tired Caramel eyes, watching the motion picture in almost a daze, a thoughtful expression playing on the mans, usually frowning face, Only seeming to snap out his daydream, and speak his thoughts aloud, when the moons reflection on the water, bounced back to his gaze, making his dull eyes appear like a glowing, and vibrant honey, the type you would see on a nearly setting sunset, or almost like a ring of gold that was held up to the light. 

snapping his head to the side, to shy away from the moons unwanted attention, his arms raised and folded over his chest, back slumping against the bark of a tall tree, that stood behind him. 

He took a careful glance around, raising one of his arms up, to brush his purple fringe to the side, so he could make sure he was seeing clearly.In case there were any unwanted visitors.

 When he noticed no one seemed to be around, he smiled gently, his shoulders slouching down, as he seemed to relax slightly. Hand linger at the base of his neck, for a moment longer then need, before he finally spoke his thoughts aloud, as though speaking to some invisible person, who at this point he was wishing was Patton, an old friend of his. 

“if i could break this spell, i’d run to him today..” 

He called into the wistful night, pushing off the tree, with a small swing in his steps, and tip toeing over the stones of the pond,stepping from stone to stone, with each word, as though it was a dance, before abruptly stopping near the end, eyes watching the breeze move a tuff of grass gently before continuing. 

“and somehow i know he’s on his way to me.”

Virgil couldn't help but whisper in reassurance, Left hand clenching to a fist, in hopes of stopping any negative thoughts. That night choose this rare moment of clarity to seep in like toxic fumes. 

Eyes gently closing he took a deep breath, as he recalled the smiling face of that of his betrothed, and in return, he couldn't help but smile softly back, all worry's melting, with that single images.

 His fiances own words lingering in his mind, before he himself repeated them, Only switching out his own name, for that of his future’s.

“Roman, you and i were meant to be..”

His chin raised up high, as he tilted his head back, eyes fluttering open, to stare at the wide, star filled sky, 

“far longer then forever.. i’ll hold you in my heart.”

Virgil’s head dropped once more, as he finished his trip across the stones of the lake, only glancing back once, when he made it to grassy land once again, the wind seeming to get chillier. 

“it’s almost like you’re here with me”

He all but chuckled, not being able to help looking up to the stars once more, after all. Roman was also under the same sky somewhere. Right?

“although we’re far apart..”

Another sigh left his lips, before he slipped into the woods. Cloke being tugged closer for warmth

“Far longer than forever”

was called into the night, our attention is brought to that of a man, in princely attire, leaning against the stone wall of a rather large balcony, arms folded ever so casually upon the ledge, as his Forest like gaze glided from left to right, before finding their resting place above, and towards the heavens, arm reaching up slightly as though to reach out, and grasp one of the shining bulbs from the night air.

“as constant as a star!”

His tone was hopeful, and oh so love struck, That the man, who stood at the doors of the balcony behind him, couldn't help but feel sympathy for his prince, He was sent to fetch the prince as his mother wished to speak with him about the possibility of a new marriage. However- Logan felt as though he was intruding, and didn't wish to sour Roman’s mood. So without another word, he slicked back inside... he would say Roman was sleeping..

“i close my eyes-”

The prince mummered, eyes closing, as a distant memory appeared like a movie, Of none other than Virgil, a book in his hands as he stared back as Roman looking almost mortified.

Before his cheeks flushed a dark red and he raised the book to his nose, slouching down in his seat as though hiding, gaze still shifting from the pages back to Roman suspiciously, before his eyes crinkled up, as the book clearly hid a smile.

“And i am were you are..”

“as sure as the dawn bring’s the sunrise”

Virgil continued as he wandered through the familer woods, that seemed to almost light up like magic, thanks to the fire flies that seemed to be around, Squinting in the dark as he looked for the slightest hint of the barrier wall. He knew he wouldn't be able to get out, but even knowing where the end was, would be a big help to him.

leafs crunched beneath his boots.

“we’ve an unshakable bond” he claimed loudly, reaching up, as he pulled himself up into a tree, with very little struggle, and a determined aura.

Roman meanwhile spun back on his heels, taking a few breaths of the air, striding back inside with almost a bounce in his step, 

closing the grand doors behind him, and leaning against them for a mere moment, 

“destined to last for a life time-“

he stopped for a split second, suddenly remembering a rather important portrait they had stored away in the palace, an excited grin itching it’s way to his lips, eyes sparkling with the dimmed lights of the room, before he suddenly took off out into the hall, finding his thought.

“and beyond!”

He'd exclaim

“Far longer than forever!”                                   

 Roman would exclaim joyously, swinging open two beautifully                        carved doors, displaying a old  and unorganized room,his posture straightening as he attempted to look for what he was looking for,    till finally- his eyes landed on the that of a large rectangular shaped sheets.                                         

 “Far longer than forever..”   

 Virgil whispered to himself, as though it were a reminder.                                       Pulling himself up, higher and higher,before finally making it to the top, The moon Casting a glow upon the area from behind,acting like some sort of torch, Virgil looked down for a moment, noting how his own shadow seemed 10 times larger on  the ground. Amusement sparkled in his gaze.     

ignoring the cloud of dust that whirled and crashed around, as though it were a roaring wave,He charged forward, grasping the tattered sheet tightly and  without a second thought he pulled, only creating a more  powerful curtain of dancing dust.                                                           

|However as his gaze moved up wards he was confronted with a wonderful sight, The nearly invisible shimmer, of what almost ,resembled that of a bubble’s rainbowed reflection, without a second thought he  began to climb down, Watching his steps carefully, his gaze never seeming to lack that driven stare as he made it his mission to get there. he’ll be closer to Roman.                   

                                   Giddy feeling filling them,

                                 as them couldn't help but call out,

                                    “I swear that ill be true!”     

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Each holding a different tone to their voice as they did so, but each also holding thing in common, Honestly. Their voices were so clear and honest, there would be no competition. they were not lying, it was as though calling out their thoughts at this very moment, was their way of marrying then and there, as though these, were their vows. unintentional yes, yet fate seemed to sing to it nicely.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As the dust cloud cleared,Roman’s  eyelids drooped a content manner. His feet seeming to carrying him in a shuffling manner, as if his body was scared, the footsteps would bring unwanted attention this way.  

His right hand raised slowly, gently resting against the rough texture of  the cotton canvas, fingers brushing away the dust, eyes never leaving   the neatural expression of the then  teenage Virgil.  It was in that moment of looking at that portrait, Roman knew,              

He would wait a lifetime for this man. Resting his head against the dusted canvas, for once not   worried if he would dirty his treasured chestnut locks.   opening his lip, he began to    whisper, as though speaking   to the figure dressed in dark clothing, That stayed un-moving with-in the paining,

“i made an everlasting, vow,  to find a way to you...”                             

Virgil’s feet hit the ground with a soft thud, Head turning sharply to the direction he had previously noticed the soapy surface,Steps staring slow, yet turning into a run as he found himself desperate to get there,   .  

His breathes seemed so loud, even though he was aware they would most likely go unnoticed to anyone but himself, but he didn’t care at this moment in time. As he still heard it. He felt a tightening in his chest, as he realised he didn’t know when he would see Roman again..would he wait for him?

Stopping for a Moment, He caught his   breath, One memory somehow reassuring him all would be well, he trusted Roman, And after the day in the gardens.. He knew Roman would wait, As would he. Perplexed stare turning into that of a wistful one, lips turning upward into a smile, cheeks reddening, slightly, from let it be the cold, running or   something else, he hummed out,

 “i made an everlasting vow, to find a way to you...”

                         ~~~~~~~~~~

He stayed still for a moment, simply lost in memory lane,   Before pushing away from the painting, spinning to leave the room, he cast one more glance towards the painting, and felt regret seep into his soul, as he realised he basically sat around and did nothing while the one he loved was lost, 

He could be god knows where! with that-   that! Coward of a snake face!             

  And he was a Prince for god’s sake! yes- his Mother was the  one to stop him the first time he tried to leave, HOWEVER- he  felt disgusted in himself for even    leaving it at that, the moment  Virgil was missing. Holding back                          his frustrations, Roman cried out  |                                                                    

“far longer then forever like no love ever known..”                                           

It was said as though he was reading from a storybook, his  footsteps now also resembling   the presence of thunder, Roman as    made a b-line to his study, and here,god forbid anyone who stood in outside  his way. there  The moment he entered the very much, red, room. He  was    overcome with so much, sudden    regret, that he dropped into a seat        

 Head in hands, He was scared for  his dear, what if he was hurt-   what if he was scared- what if he-   Roman stopped, in the midst of his  ramblings, realizing that in his  pursuit of sitting, he had knocked  over a frame, and auto-matically  scooped it up, one hand holding it  as the others finger tips, grazed the lettering, of that, of what was framed,  That being an extract from a letter        from none other than his beloved,    And as though this is was a sign from some being out there,  Roman followed the outline of the cursive yet messy writing.               

                                                          “i’ll never be alone....”                       

Roman whispered beneath his   breath, staring at the note in   awe, as well as longing. The lying shit would   his gaze fell, grip tightening on   frame,                                             

“much stronger than forever”           

he vowed.                               

without much of a warning, he suddenly  took off running again, even faster this time, ‘ If he simply gave up at every anxious  thought, He would never get what he  needed.’ Once again, Patton's words held     held the key to the confidence, Virgil didn't   know he had.  just as he reached out, and touched, the cold and glass like surface, His words coming out in a puff of air, that seemed to blend almost wonderfully with the wind,  as though creating music, with the passion and nostalgia that lingered with his words, One would not dare call it anything different  then the song it seemed to be,                     

 “far longer than forever, like no love ever known!”                                                      

 His forehead rested against the  un-breakable shield in front of him, even      with this obstacle in the way, for once Virgil didn't feel disconnected or afraid,   he previously had, because he was he was now one step closer to the  world, where his Roman was, to him   was no reason to be upset anymore, and   this would do for now, he smiled, head still resting against the prison like cage.         

 sighing, he leaned back slight, just enough to turn around and face the             woods, the back of his head once again  resting against the wall ever so casually,   knees pulled up in a more comfortable position, he watched on into the night the only sound to be heard, was that of his   own  breathing, and criminally loud crickets   that Virgil swore, should just shut up already, and let him be with his thoughts. looking down to his hands he fidgeted  humming to himself, Things that he   would never say to that lovable moron’s  face, He gave away the true reason he  was satisfied being here right now,             

 “and with your love”

“i’ll never be alone..”

Only after these words were spoken did     Virgil fall silent. He would soon have to       return to the clearing, The lying shit would return by morning, and the cured male     really didn't feel like getting an earful.

“far longer than forever” he reminded.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   

Virgil hesitantly stood, a longing look being sent outwards, towards the world beyond the one he was trapped in now, He knew he needed to be found. As secrecy was the only thing keeping him in, and so he hoped he was right... he hoped Roman had a plan...

“and with your love ill never be alone...”

He repeated quietly to himself, as he began his decent back to the small cottage in the clearing, he now called home. Having to repeat that one sentence many times over in his head during the walk, just so he would slip back, to his state he was in before this night..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Meanwhile. Roman had stood from his seat, The gorgeous golden frame, now gently placed back in it’s rightful spot, amoungst many other important documents on the Prince’s desk.

His expression reflected that of seriousness, and a rather frightening look, a look not many had seen, the sour and bitter stare, of a man who had lost everything, yet would try anything to get it all back, even if it meant playing dirty.

His steps were muffled by the crimson carpet beneath him, And a hand cupped in his chin in serious thought. only stopping once he reached, a rather large window, resting the hand that was wrapped around his chin, against one of the wooden beams that split the window into 16 squares. 

Dangerous stare lingering on his own desperate reflection, as he made an unheard oath to Virgil, one he would stick by, even if it meant disobeying his Mother’s wishes, and disrespecting Logan’s tactics.

“I will find you Virgil...this time i will find you, because even though it has merely been 2 months, my love- it feels as though a life time has pasted..and i feel as though each day as left an ache of regret, for those days that i did not wish to see us betrothed..” he couldn't help but laugh slightly to cover up his sadness, the tiny hint of a sad and hurting smile, lingering on his lips,

 but- quickly he found himself falling back into his serious appearance, the moment he heard a knock at his study door, followed by the familer voice of the Queen, asking if Roman was inside,as she wished to speak with him,

 For a moment he remained quite, but after a moment or two decided he might as well hear what she has to say now, rather than later, so with a small temple massege, He sighed and called out a quick and polite come in, before swearing an oath to himself, in his mind, both hand clenching into fists as he did so.

“i swear i’ll save him, and i’ll never forsake those days, when i can wake, knowing he is in my life again, I swear by it, till death and sacrifice.. “