#if Paige is a love interest it won’t bother me

[ill-beyour-captain]

I dont get why so many people are freaking out about Flight of Icarus destroying the fanon lore? Like the book isn’t going to be completely completely canon first of all and even if it was

Isn’t the point of fanon to pick and choose what you like and change some things from the canon material?

So far in canon Eddie Munson is dead

In our minds though? He is alive and thriving and either pining over Steve or already with him

Basically what I’m saying we don’t need to freak out about the book destroying no Eddie because we can ignore anything we don’t like :)

[empress-of-snark]

It seems like Eddie will have a thing for Paige in "Flight of Icarus". Do you think the fandom will be over then?

As in, do I think people will stop making Hellcheer content? No, I don’t. I know I won’t anyway. I still have quite a ways to go in my Friends fic, and I’d like to keep writing for them after that.

I may be poking a bear here, but I have noticed that some Hellcheer shippers tend not to like the idea of either Eddie or Chrissy ever really having feelings for someone else prior to each other. I mean, I tried to write Patrick as the ideal high school sweetheart in my fic, and some readers still don’t like him for the simple fact that he dated Chrissy before she even knew Eddie existed lmao.

While I understand the appeal of viewing them as a “one true love” kind of thing, I don’t think it’s unrealistic at all for them to have prior relationships or infatuations. People can fall in love multiple times in their life.

After all, it’s not actually canon that Eddie was crushing on Chrissy since middle school, just that he remembers meeting her back then, so him being interested in another girl two years before he’s even reconnected with Chrissy is perfectly fine with me. And if it bothers anyone else, just don’t read the book. I think people are too concerned about what’s canon or not nowadays. It’s not a rule book. Ship whatever you want.

Anyway, that’s my two cents on it. I am absolutely, 100% not looking to start any discourse in the fandom over this, I’m just giving my opinion lol.

Thanks for the ask!

[mozak-hh]

Genshin impact headcanon:

How they find out they’re in love with you

I was just listening to, “love songs,” by Kaash Paige and I got really imspired to do a cute little headcanon. I would recommend listening to the song while reading this cus it is a major vibe ;)

Pairings: Zhongli, Diluc, Kaeya, albedo

Songs to vibe to for the headcanon lol

Zhongli:

Zhongli’s not used to feeling puppy love, those feeling are beneath gods. Especially after all of his years alive, he thought love was something that had run its course. In his earlier centuries, perhaps, but never now.

After meeting you for the first time, he grow fond very quickly of your childish remarks and youthful attitude. It refreshes him to know that not everyone is made of stone. And after your first encounter he goes out of his way to bump into you more and more often.

This usually disrupts your tasks with Childe, so he is the first one who catches on to Zhongli’s little interest in you. Childe will often bicker with Zhongli about it, but instead of snapping back Zhongli will just act oblivious about it.

Zhongli isn’t the type to think extremely deeply about things, so I don’t think he’ll have trouble accepting his feeling about you. But that doesn’t mean he won’t be surprised, and it might take him a while to really figure it out.

He goes back to the place you first had lunch with him and steals collects the cup from where you sat, holding the fragile price of antique in his hand and turning it slightly, inspecting it. He then circles the brim with his thumb, sighing and putting in his pocket. He then puts it on the shelve in his office. Looking at it time to time.

Further on into your friendship with him. Zhongli finds himself idolising your form and appearance. Caressing you hair when you hug him, lifting the stands to his face for a closer look, you’ll never know that though.

He’ll offer his arm to you when you walk around the harbour with him. Letting you wrap you hand around it while talking about your latest discoveries in Liyue. Rest your head on his shoulder and you may hear him suck in a breath. Trying to compose himself. It’s not everyday gods get attached to humans. So when it does happen, you can expect them to be way more possessive than the average significant other.

Albedo:

this man is quite awkward with his feelings ok? he could write a 30 page essay on the essence of human life but not one sentence could describe the way he thrives when your around him. 

he would see you walk past the alchemy shop everyday, smiling and talking to the shopkeeper. Before he met you he wouldn’t think to much about it, but after the events in Dragonspine, he grows fond of staring at you outside the shop window, leaving his notebooks and research to sit idly and gaze. On some occasions he may even draw you, search through his notepad the next time the two of you meet and you might find out how many pages exactly he has of you. 

the first ones to catch on to his little antics is his apprentices, Sucrose mainly. Though she wont pry too much, as Albedo would often call her ridiculous for thinking such things, she’ll giggle every time she sees Albedo at the window. Knowing exactly what he’s doing. 

One day, while you are staying in Diluc’s tavern, Albedo goes wondering around the stalls in Mondstadt, buying flowers from the little girl near the gates. using his magic he evolves them into luscious blooms of colour, and begins his trek to the tavern. It is only once he reaches your room door does he realise what he’s actually doing. This is when it hits him. That perhaps you are worth more to him than his hunger for knowledge. He lets the flowers drop to floor. So many months of drawing your figure and longing for the taste of your touch and now he’s too scared to even knock on your door? he slouches and walks back to where he came from. Not bothering to pick up those beautiful flowers left behind. It is when you finally open your door to get fresh air do you almost step on them. Noticing their other-worldly hue, you knew only one man would have the kind of abilities to make these.    

A week goes by, and you and Albedo are up in Dragonspine once again to do research on more artefacts he collected. He treads lightly in the snow, gazing at the way your eyes light up as you talk. he then flinches slightly when he feels your warm hand reach for his own, and you look up at him with a smirk. “The flowers where so beautiful, it’s a shame you didn't bring them to me yourself,” you then lightly kiss his cheek and walk off, leaving him a blushing mess in the cold.  

Diluc:

Diluc is known to have little to no interest in women. Much to people’s dismay, this man has no intention of marrying a women so they can steal his money. That is until he met you, of course. 

With him money has no limits, so expect to receive many gifts during your nights out with him, or seeing him after he’s been away on business. Whether that be an embroidered lace from fancy stores, or a jade necklace all the way from Liyue, Diluc will show you a world of luxury. 

Diluc will always place you beside him at dinner parties or fancy ball. Since he’s been surrounded by vicious women his entire life, it calms him to know you’re right beside him. 

there is always a room in the tavern for you, whether you need it or not. The bartenders on duty always know you are allowed to stay after hours, and the drinks always come free of charge. 

After a month or two of receiving these perks, you grow tired of seeing so much of Diluc’s purchases, but never enough of the real him. So you seek him out at his winery. 

you have no luck finding him however, so you opt for waiting in his office until he eventually shows up. While you wait, you notice a large stack of letters, all of which have your name on it. 

Elegant, handwritten love letters. Each and every one of them. Telling you how beautiful you are, and how your smile is always on his mind. In fact, everything about you is edged into his memory, all these gifts you receive having some sort of connection to reminding him of you. The fact that when you wore the dress he bought you last week, it took him days to shake the heat from his body, the longing to touch you. 

After an hour or so of reading these letters, your face is completely red. And as soon as you begin to calm down, the red haired gentleman strides thought the door with a fat stack of papers he needs to sign. You jump from your seat, letters falling out of your lap and down to the floor as you do so. He takes one look at the papers surrounding you, and immediately know what they are. Perhaps if he had been brave enough to send these to you, he may of not been this embarrassed. 

“As much as I am glad that you finally understand my emotions surrounding you, I would have been more keen to have spoke them to you in person. But that can wait for now. How about you join me for dinner?”

Kaeya: 

This lover boy is actually very helpless when it comes to real love. After exposing himself to the elements of your personality, he falls head over heals for you. Possible one of the toughest men to come to term with their feeling to be honest. His flirty and obnoxious behaviour deceiving him in the end. 

Kaeya would prefer to see you in the morning. Having coffee before work with you is his personal favourite. It is these genuine outings that he loves most. Unlike the occasional nights of pleasure he has had beforehand. With you, he feels his heart is more precious to you, not his body. As many women would eventually go with a one night stand with the lesser brother of a rich man, than to have conversations with him over a cup of coffee. 

On a more positive note, Kaeya will start to recruit you for more and more missions just to enjoy your company. It wont be long till people start to assume you are his personal assistant for the knights. Seeing you accompany him on everyone of his outings. This is where you start to use his office.

The both of you slowly start to share the same working space after a few weeks of being on his team. Memories in his office are some of his fondest when it come to you. staying in and having dinner with him after a long day at work. Sharing stories with him during those mountains of paperwork. Joking with him during work breaks. More importantly, comforting him after heavy battles. 

When Kaeya starts to act more like a puppy around you, it is Diluc that teases him bout being a fool in love, and this is what causes Kaeya to finally understand it. Like a break in the ice. All of these months devoting his time to you, never to act on his feelings because on uncertainty. But know he knows he has you, and unlike many of these other women, you wouldn’t be going anywhere. 

Kaeya sits impatiently at the local café, tapping his finger on the table as he glows a light shade of pink. Once he’s sees you coming towards his table, his blush sharpens as he stumbles to grab the flowers he bought you beforehand.  

aaaand there! Another genshin headcanon, sorry such the long wait. I’ve been pretty busy at work :p comment if you have any suggestions x

[nahimjustfeelingit-writes]

Imagine

The Reader is a virgin and Erik gives her oral turning her out/Erik dry humping The Reader playfully

I am doing two imagines in one because I wanted to write these two together I think it fits lol. Also, it took me forever to write this that is why I haven’t updated in like three days. Very long, and very detailed. Enjoy 💖

Warnings: SMUT, Bickering, slight FLUFF, Daddy-dom, mention of blood, Virgin SMUT, dry humping. 

Like & Reblog

“Yo, am I gonna have to pop this clown! Nigga, don’t you EVER put your fucking hands on my best friend like that. When she tells you no that means no, nigga.”

She looked at him with cautious eyes. Her best friend, Erik Stevens, was there to save the day. Thank God for him. The guy who had a death wish was pushing up on her and grabbing her ass after Y/N told him multiple times that she wasn’t interested. All she had to do was hit up Erik and he came to the rescue. He didn’t fuck around when it involved Y/N. That was his Thickums.

Don��t nobody fuck wit’ my Thickums. I will kill for her.

That’s just how it was.  Erik and Y/N  have been best friends since she met him through her brother. It didn’t take long to connect and vibe the way they both did. Tony, her big bro, died in a motorcycle accident and even though she hates to say it, that accident brought Erik and her closer. Now he was Y/N’s protector since Tony was dead. Erik is older than Tony by three years and Y/N by four.

“Aye, my fault, bruh, this yo girl?” The drunk asshole with frisky hands asked.

“Does that matter? Don’t worry about all that,” Erik pointed a deadly finger at the guy almost shoving his head back, “Don’t touch her again, BRUH, before I put you six feet under-“

“Erik!” Her prominent eyes went wide staring up at him before she mouthed let it go. Over the years Y/N gained some upper body strength with the number of times she had to hold Erik back from killing someone. The thing is, he would literally KILL someone. He didn’t hide anything from her. The times he’d been away was times when he was off doing a mercenary job adding scars to his body. He would come and go with little communication and each time felt like a hole was being drilled into her heart.

Now here he was. Back home after a couple of months. He seemed angrier than the other times he came back from a job. His eyes were stone cold and pitch black. Nostrils flared and blowing smoke like a dragon. Hennessy running through his veins. Fists clenched and veins popping out his arms. Y/N grabs Erik’s jaw to make him look down at her. When she did, his eyes seemed to soften and then a teasing smile spread across his lips.

“I’m cool, Thickums,” He wrapped his arm around her shoulder, “I won’t kill nobody tonight, I promise.”

They both had an audience at this little bar and lounge that Y/N’s friend, Paige, dragged her to. All the black people staring over at the bar to see if a fight would break out so they could record. The disgusting guy who tried to touch Y/N walked away muttering something and Y/N was sure that Erik overheard it. Pulling Y/N in closer, Erik placed a kiss to her forehead before turning her back around to face the bar. The smell of his Tom Ford cologne burned her nose. He dragged his face along her wild curly hair with his arm still around her. Y/N didn’t complain because she knew her best friend missed her and he was also very drunk. However, that wasn’t until Erik leaned against her, causing her breasts to painfully smash against the edge of the bar. He was doing that shit on purpose now.

“Erik, stop! you’re putting all your body weight on me, “ Y/N complains as she rolls her eyes before pushing Erik away.

“I miss you, Thickums. It’s always good to see my best friend when I come back home.”

“If you miss me so much you wouldn’t leave like you do, stupid,” She could feel Erik wrapping his large arms around her waist, prompting his biceps to mold into her hips. He was very touchy-feely when he was drunk and Y/N knew she was going to have to babysit his ass. No driving at all.

“Why would you drive here drunk, Erik?” She spoke with a stern voice.

“Because...I can,” He looked down at her with an elevated brow, “Why, you’re gonna punish me, Thickums?”

“If only I could tame your big ass.”

“You wish you could tame me, baby girl. So what’s really been up with you?”

She chuckled before taking a seat at the bar, “Besides the same old everyday boring shit, I’ve been getting set up with blind dates by Paige and her friends.”

“Blind dates? Really?” Erik shook his head before smiling, “And how did that go?”

“Fucking horrible. That’s all they want is sex. I don’t have time for that mess.”

Erik bit down on his bottom lip to suppress a laugh.

“What?” She asked with a bothered tone.

“I keep forgetting you still have your V card.”

She looked around her at the crowded bar to see if anyone overheard him. Blushing, Y/N takes a sip of her mixed drink. She didn’t want to get on the topic of virginity.

“Let me guess,” Erik nudged her with his shoulder, “You don’t wanna talk about it?”

“Nope. And definitely not here.”

“We ain’t gotta talk about it here we can talk on the way back to your place.”

Y/N leaned back from Erik with a playful smile, “You’re spending the night with me, bestie?”

“Only because I don’t feel like making that drive to my new spot. You gotta come through soon it’s dope.”

“Just like that Audi R8 V10 you got parked outside?”

Erik glanced over at her with low eyes and a smirk, “You love the whip, huh?”

“Love it?” Y/N’s eyes rolled with a leering expression on her face, “Love it doesn’t even describe how much I envy you right now.”

“You’re not driving my shit, woman,” Erik shook his head before waving his hand in her face, “I said no! you can’t drive for shit.”

“HERE WE GO,” Her voice grew loud and defensive, “I can drive jack ass-“

“Not when you swerve up on the sidewalk you can’t-“

“Bitch, don’t even play with me like that it was one time!”

Erik glared at her, his voice becoming deep and gravely, “Did you just call me a bitch?”

“I-Yes, yes I did.”

“You better watch your fucking mouth, Thickums. You’re lucky you’re my bestie because if not...”

Erik smirked before turning away from her. Y/N blinked at him with interest, impatience written all over her face.

“If not, what?”

“...Put my dick in your mouth to make you shut up.”

“Oh...” her skin felt like a furnace.

“See, that’s why I didn’t want to say it. You need to loosen up, bestie,” Erik nudges her shoulder playfully.

“I can’t believe you just said that to me, E,” Y/N avoided Erik’s eye. She couldn’t understand why she felt so...turned on. Maybe it was because that was the first time a guy ever said something like that to her. She wouldn’t feel so awkward if he said that to another girl but he was referring to her in that manner. Now, the wheels in her head were turning. What if Erik wanted Y/N to be his girl? What if he thought about having sex with her but didn’t mention it for obvious reasons. Y/N was so deep in thought at the bar that she hadn’t noticed Erik calling her name. It took for him to wrap his arms around her waist again and pull her close to him for her to finally snap out of her daze and come back to the present.

“Huh?” She said with a whimsical expression on her face.

“You good? Should we bounce?” Erik asked with concern. His brown eyes focused on her intently.

“Um, yeah, we can,” She grabbed her clutch from the bar, grimacing a little because it was sticky at the bottom, “let me just tell Paige and then we can go-“

“Paige ain’t worried, look,” Erik pointed to a small section near a bar on the other side of the lounge. Paige was surrounded by a few men and her other friends she brought with her. They were freak dancing and flirting with drinks in their hands and low eyes.

“Paige ain’t worried. She too busy freaking on some dude.”

“And drunk out of her damn mind,” Y/N added with a disapproving tone.

“Jealousy isn’t a good look, bestie,” Erik joked.

“Jealous? Why the fuck would I be jealous, Erik?”

“Because deep down in your virgin heart, you want to let loose and grind that thick ass on a nigga. I know you do. You ain’t even gotta front with me. I know you better than you know yourself, Thickums.”

“Clearly you don’t, because-“

“Save all that shit, ma,” Erik threw down some money that the bartender graciously grabbed before someone else did, “Let’s go. We need to have a little discussion.”

“No,” she shook her curly head, “You are drunk, I’m calling an Uber.”

“I’m not getting in the back of somebody’s car when I have my own,” Erik snatched her phone from her hand, “And I’m not drunk, just a little buzzed. I’ll finish off my bottle when we get in the house, ma.”

“Whatever,” Y/N stomped away and through the crowd, leaving Erik behind. He caught up with her and grabbed her hand, both of them rushing out of the claustrophobic lounge. Finally, outside, Y/N was thankful for the 60-degree weather because it felt much better against her skin than the 90 degrees in the lounge.

“Can I have my phone back now, DAD?”

“Not with that fucking attitude,” Erik pulled her arm like she was a bad kid, “Let’s go.”

Y/N stayed rooted to the spot. She pulled her arm back causing Erik to stumble and a black couple to walk past snickering. Erik looked down at her as if she tried to kill him. Eyes round saucers, nostrils flared, breathing heavily like a dungeon dragon, grip on her hand tighter than before, Erik was pissed.

“Y/N,” Erik looked from side to side before speaking in a gruff low tone, “Don’t make me embarrass you out here, best friend or not, I will whip that ass.”

“Okay, Killmon-“

“Say it.” Erik dared her. Y/N snapped her mouth shut before lowering her head to fight a smile. She loved toying with Erik.

“Getting on my damn nerves,” He pulled her again, “now come on before I throw you over my shoulder.”

“Fine,” She stopped with her games for now. They both walked down the street and around a corner to find Erik’s car parked next to a Subway. He unlocked the doors with a click of a button before walking to the passenger side to allow Y/N access. She slipped inside and watched Erik shut the door softly. As he walked around to the other side, Y/N opened the door again and slammed it shut. She snickered and damn near lost her breath at the way he stopped in front of the car and scowled at her. He nodded his head slowly before walking with his chest poked out to the driver's side. Y/N could not control her laughing. Hand clutched for her chest, eyes welling up with tears, breathing nonexistent. She was in literal shambles.

“WHAT THE FUCK, GIRL!” Erik growled, “You really asking for it don’t be slamming my door like that!!!!fuck is wrong with you!!!”

“You should have seen your face, oh my God,” she threw her head back, “You were ready to kill me over your whip.”

“You wanna try me again?” Erik asked with an even tone. But it was a dangerous tone of voice.

“If it makes you look all angry like a pit bull then HELL YEAH,” Y/N closed her eyes, falling into laughter again.

“I really wanna throw you over my lap and pop that big ass butt until you cry.”

Y/N licked her lips, the laughter gone and replaced with a shocked expression.

“...did you? I mean...did you just?”

Erik didn’t say a word. He started his car, turned the volume up on the radio, and focused all of his attention on driving even though his hands were itching to spank her good and hard.

“Erik?” Y/N asked with a soft tone. Still, nothing from him.

“E-Kill-I’m sorry,” She put an innocent smile on her face, “I love you, bestie, don’t be mad at me.”

“You really know how to piss a nigga off.”

Y/N beamed, leaning over to kiss Erik’s cheek, “It was all jokes, kay? I just like messing with you.”

Erik shook his head, “It’s because you know I won’t get you for it. But that’s where you’re wrong, Thickness,” Erik reaches across to the passenger side, grabbing Y/N’s exposed thigh and squeezing it hard. She swatted his hand away before kissing her teeth. Erik laughs before mushing her playfully.

“What do you mean?” She looked at him with wary eyes while massaging her upper thigh. His grip was firm.

“My best friend is too beautiful and sexy and she needs to let loose a little, cut all that shy shit out. You hear me talking to you, Thickums?”

“I hear you but I’m not following,” She gave Erik a puzzled look.

“When we get back to the house,” Erik paused for mystery, “I’m gonna teach you some things.”

“Huh?”

“You’ll see. Put your seatbelt on.”

Y/N fastened her seatbelt. She kept her eyes on Erik to see if he would break down and tell her but no, he acted like she wasn’t even there staring at him with her doe eyes. Y/N pouts, folding her arms across her chest. The silence was eating her alive. The drive felt longer than usual. As soon as they pulled into her Apartment Complex and Erik parked his car next to hers, she hopped out and walked to her building to unlock the door. Erik took his time grabbing his bottle of Hennessy to annoy her further. He even turned up the music in his car to bop to a little while drinking.

“Drip to hard/don’t stand too close/you gon’ fuck around and drown off this wave/doing all these shows/I’ve been on the road/I don’t care where I go/long as I get paid/bad lil vibe/she been on my mind/Soon as I get back/she gettin’ slayed/do this all the time/this ain’t no surprise/every other night/another movie getting made!!”

She watched Erik rap in his driver's seat, tapping her foot rapidly against the concrete with a mug on her face. She was fuming watching him have his little concert.

“Erik!!!” She yelled at him even though he could hardly hear her with that loud music.

“What’s up, Y/N!”

Y/N turned to see her neighbor, Sharnese, walking towards the building in a pair of leggings and a thin ass T-shirt with a bonnet on her head.

“Hey, Nese,” Y/N groaned, her eyes focusing back on Erik dancing in his driver's seat.

“You okay, girl?” Sharnese followed Y/N’s line of vision and a big smile appeared on her face. Sharnese squealed like a schoolgirl, jumping up and down making her titties bounce around.

“IS THAT ERIK?!”

“Yeah, that’s his annoying ass-“

“OH MY GOD ITS BEEN FOREVER SINCE IVE SEEN HIM!” She rushed towards his car. Sharnese ran around to Erik’s side, knocking on his window. Erik looked over at her before smirking, rolling his window down. Sharnese wrapped her arms around Erik’s neck before leaning into the car, all in Erik’s face, planting a kiss to his cheek. They were talking a little too close for Y/N’s liking. She was growing jealous.

Why is this bitch on my best friend like that?

Sharnese giggles then she bit her lip.

Girl, you do too much.

“Erik!!!!!!” Y/N yelled making her throat raw. Sharnese and Erik looked over at her as if she interrupted something.

“What? Let’s go!” Y/N finally unlocked the door to the building before pulling it open and stomping up the steps to her place. She was so angry that she dropped her keys a few times while trying to get her apartment door, 2C, opened.

“I haven’t seen Nese in a minute, Y/N, stop acting like that.”

She ignored Erik and walked into her place, kicking off her shoes at the door. Feeling a vibration inside her clutch, Y/N pulled her phone out to see that she’d gotten a message notification from Paige letting her know that she made it home safe with everyone.

“She was all in your face, Erik.”

“I know,” He walked to the kitchen to retrieve a few cups, “She’s cute. Pretty and ghetto.”

“Erik, shut up.”

“I don’t want her, Y/N. Stop being jealous. Every time I come home you have me to yourself. A nigga has needs too. Just because you ain’t getting none doesn’t mean I don’t want none.”

“Was that a jab at me for being a virgin?” She was truly offended.

“Let’s talk about that.”

Y/N saw Erik pouring two cups of Hennessy and apple juice.

“What is there to talk about? I haven’t had dick Erik, boo-hoo, what’s so special?”

Erik almost spilled his drink, “What’s so special? Man,” He laughs, “You wouldn’t be saying that if you let a nigga pop your cherry.”

“I don’t want just any nigga taking my virginity, my pussy is too precious for any nigga.”

“You’re right,” Erik swirled his drink around his mouth before swallowing, “That’s why I have a suggestion.”

“If it involves one of your friends, fuck no-“

“If you shut up and let me talk, Thickums, then you’ll know.”

Y/N sat down on her carpeted floor in her living room, head leaning back against the couch. She motioned for Erik to speak.

“What if...I help you out?”

“Come again?” She asked him to clarify.

“What if I am the one to...” Erik made a motion with his hands to make her catch on to what he was inquiring about. Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion at that very moment. Y/N stares unblinking at Erik. Even him snapping his fingers in her face didn’t break her out of it.

“Oh my God,” Erik ran his hands down his face frustratingly, “It’s sex, Y/N, I’m asking you to let me be the nigga to pop your precious cherry.”

Still bewildered, she opened then closed her mouth like a fish in the water.

“Hello?” Erik said with annoyance, “Why are you giving me the silent treatment now?”

“Um...” Y/N laughs nervously,  lifting from the floor to take a seat while gripping the edge of the couch, “Erik...are you for real?”

“No, I’m for play,” Erik chuckles, “Yes, Thickums, I’m asking you to...let me...you know...lay that pipe.”

“Nah,” Y/N motioned for Erik to pass her his cup, “That’s enough devil juice for you tonight, bestie, you are really tripping.”

Erik threw it back in one sip before placing his cup on the coffee table, “I’m dead ass, ma, no games over here. I really wanna hit.”

“Wow. What the hell happened to you when you were gone for two whole months?”

“Nothing, I’m still the same old Erik. Just...okay don’t look at me like that,” Erik rolls his eyes, “You want me to keep it real?”

Y/N tilted her head up at Erik, “Yes, I want you to keep it real and stop messing around. You don’t play and say something like that unless you really want to do that, you get what I’m saying?”

“Yeah,” Erik lets out a breath slowly, “which is why I’m about to be brutally honest.”

“Fuck,” Y/N nibbled on her bottom lip.

“Fuck ain’t even the word, Thickums,” Erik looked over at his Hennessy, “I’m gonna need more to drink.”

“Fill mine up too,” Y/N really needed it. Her stomach felt queasy. She figured drinking Erik’s favorite drink would calm her nerves and prepare her for what this man had to say. Erik walked over with her cup and the bottle, settling next to her on the couch. He poured himself a cup, then handed her the mixture he made with the apple juice. Y/N curled up into the corner of the couch while tucking her toes into the cushion to warm them. She fixed her skirt so Erik wouldn’t have a straight-on view of her panties.

“Aight so listen,” Erik leans on his thighs while twirling his cup in hand, “I’ve thought about having sex with you on plenty of occasions but I didn’t initiate it because you’ve been my best friend since like, forever, and I just didn’t want to make the shit weird-“

“Like right now?” Y/N spoke with a shaky voice.

“Yeah...like right now. This shit is mad awkward forget I brought it up-“

“Nope,” Y/N takes a long sip before scrunching her face with disgust. Too much Hennessy and not enough apple juice.

“Don’t get scared over there cuz I know you can’t talk about sex for five seconds.”

“You’re so petty,” Y/N scowled, “Keep talking.”

“I told you I’m going to be brutally honest. And... I peep shit.”

What did he peep? Y/N sat up straighter. She felt like she was sitting in a confessional with a lie detector attached to her arm.

“For one thing, you get mad jealous when I talk to other women. Like...possessive. Two, you stare a nigga down hard when I got my shirt off and when I’m walking around in my grey sweat pants-“

“Erik-“

“Don’t interrupt me again,” He said with a husky voice. Y/N closed her mouth and listened.

“You blush anytime I make a reference to sex or compliment you, especially if I talk about your ass. You love it when I call you my Thickums. Makes you feel special doesn’t it?”

“I hate you.” She could feel her cheeks heating up. Y/N covered her face out of embarrassment.

“No, you love me,” Erik reaches across to pull her hands away, “And you have feelings for me.”

“Leave it alone, ERIK.” She was starting to grow frustrated.

“You want me to be that special nigga that pops your cherry-“

“Didn’t you pop Paige’s cherry? If that’s the case then you’re not so special, ERIK.”

Erik mugged at her, “The fuck you mean by that? I ain’t never fuck Paige. That’s a fucking insult to myself, especially this dick,” Erik pointed to the dick in question. He kissed his teeth, “Man...I can’t believe you put me and Paige in one sentence like that.”

“That’s what everybody said, Erik! And you didn’t deny it either-“

“Everybody must wanna die. I don’t like motherfuckers lying on me, Y/N. You know how I can get,” Erik’s jaw tightened, “Really? And you of all people believed that shit?”

“Because you DIDNT DENY IT.” She yelled.

“Number one, I was hardly around to deny it. Two, I don’t entertain that bullshit. It’s child’s play. Three, I would never disrespect you like that and fuck your homegirl-“

“Erik, you fucked one of my homegirls STOP IT,” Y/N laughed harshly.

“WHO?” He argued back.

“JAMILLA.” Y/N fired back.

“JAMILLA? Big titties? Chocolate? Short cut hair?”

“...Yes.” Y/N pinched the bridge of her nose. Erik was deep in thought for a second before a coy smile spread across his lips. Y/N hated his handsome smile at that very moment.

“I remember Jamilla,” Erik reaches for his cup but those dimples couldn’t be hidden even if he tried, they were too damn deep.

“She was cool,” He shrugs, bringing that cup to his lips but as soon as he looked over at Y/N’s glaring face Erik damn near spit his drink all over his crisp white T-shirt.

“Fuck you.” Y/N said with spite.

“Listen, can we just get back on topic? About you? I’m not worried about Jamilla, Paige, or Sharnese, okay? I’m worried about my best friend-“

“That you all of a sudden want to fuck?”

“It’s not all of a sudden-did you hear what I said earlier? I SAID that I thought about it plenty of times before, Thickums.”

“Well...why bring it up now?”

“Because I figured I should tell you and get it off my chest since you want some dick from a worthy nigga such as myself.”

“What makes you think it’s you that I want dick from?”

Erik bites his lower lip, “That’s really cute, ma, real cute. What other nigga is worthy? You turn down any dude that gets in your space, and I’m the only man that you’re this comfortable around. So, if that doesn’t confirm it I don’t know what else does. Unless...there are some personal reasons that you haven’t shared with me,” Erik raises a brow at her while looking at her body. Y/N felt exposed and purely shocked at Erik looking at her the way he was. All seductive and sexy.

“Admit it,” Erik pushes, “You want to lose your virginity to me but you’re afraid. You’re afraid to ask because I’m your best friend and you don’t want to make it weird and ruin our friendship. Admit it...you were saving yourself for me.”

Y/N had a vacant expression on her face. She looked away from Erik and down into her lap, twirling the ring around her finger. She couldn’t look Erik in the eyes. He was right. She was saving herself for him. She thought she could deny it for however long and hope that he would somehow make the first move on her. She hadn’t expected that day to be today. He could read her so well. Was she really that obvious?

“I don’t hear you talking, Thickums.”

“Shut up, Erik.”

“Talk to me-“

“NO!” She threw a pillow at Erik’s head, “No! I’m not saying shit.”

“Cuz’ I’m spot on,” He laughs, “I knew it-“

“Erik...shut up...right now.”

“NO. You shut up before I lay you out on this fucking couch-“

“Don’t tell me to shut up-“

“SHUT THE FUCK UP.” Erik raised his voice.

“Who are you talking to?!!!-“

Erik Damn near charged at Y/N on the couch, pinning her body down flat, bringing her arms above her head, and placing his strong body on top of hers. She squirmed, squealed, fussed, but Erik wasn’t letting go. He allowed her to grow tired so that she would have no other choice but to give in. Finally, she stopped moving and started whimpering. Erik was laid out on top of her, his crotch resting on her upper thigh. The more she made those little whimpering noises the more his dick grew. He looked down at her thigh then up into her face. She weakly met his eyes before looking away to avoid them.

“Look at me,” Erik demanded.

“No. You need to get off of me.”

“But you don’t want me to.”

Y/N moved her thigh that was directly under Erik’s crotch, giving him some friction. Erik swallowed spit. That thigh meat felt good against his dick. He went to move against her causing her to writhe beneath him, her thighs moving up and down. Up and down. Side to side. Side to side.

“What are you doing?” Y/N glanced down at her leg.

“Nothing,” Erik plays it off.

“Erik,” Y/N threw her head back against the arm of the couch, “get off of me.”

“No.”

“Pleaseeeee.” She begged.

That only made Erik move against her thigh again. Alarmed, Y/N started twisting her wrists to try and release herself from his grasp.

“What are you d-doing?” She staggered.

“Just playing,” Erik laughs.

“Playing?” Y/N watches Erik move his crotch up and down her leg.

“Erik, are you-“

“Just shut up and let it happen, Thickness,” His dick was almost at full capacity. About 95% hard. It was Y/N’s thick thighs. Felt like he was grinding into a couch cushion with how thick and soft she is. Each time his dick would rub against her, his balls would jump.

“Erik, a-are you humping me?” Y/N barely spoke. Her voice was so low in his ear. How did it get to this? One minute Y/N was calling up Erik to help her out and now he was grinding his dick against her thigh. Her face was frozen. Her limbs were stiff. She could feel that thick pole and all its length glide against her skin. Each time he came back up his dick would twist to the side in his jeans and touch her inner thigh. He was...she couldn’t find a word that best describes how big he was besides large. Enormous? Monstrous? Vast? Colossal?

“What does it look like, ma?” He bit into his lip, a soft chuckle escaping his mouth at Y/N’s expression. She was lost. Barely able to register what was happening.

“That’s what it looks like,” Y/N spoke off to the side because she couldn’t look Erik in the eye.

“This too much for you, Miss Virgin? I mean...” he swiveled his hips causing his dick to move from side to side on her thigh, “I know you’re pure and all...”

“Fuck, Erik. Please get off of m-me,” Y/N’s heart was thumping in her rib cage, “You’re drunk and when you wake up tomorrow you won’t even realize what you d-did.” She felt exhausted and all she was doing was laying there taking Erik’s assaults. He clearly thought the shit was hilarious because Y/N could tell that he was smiling in her peripheral.

“You got me over here dry humping you’re leg. Stop acting like you don’t like it and let go.”

“I can see that,” she said with an awkward tone, “Erik, I’m in literal shock right now-“

“See what? You ain’t seeing shit with your eyes looking at the wall.”

Y/N rolled her eyes before biting her tongue. She did like it. She’d never experienced it. He was centimeters away from her crotch. All he had to do was pull his pants and briefs down and there would be skin on skin humping. Y/N would probably cum right then and there from that alone. Her pussy was throbbing right now, “I have more courage to focus on the wall than at what you’re doing to me right now.”

“Thickums,” Erik whispered in her ear, “don’t you wanna see it?” Her heart stopped.

“It?” She asked with a perplexed expression.

“Yeah,” He smiled, “Tell me what it is.”

“...I don’t want to, Erik.” She shook her head, trying to force herself to breathe normally again.

“Why? Tell me, I’m your bestie.”

Why is your dick so big? Why are you making my pussy so wet? Can you please pop my cherry? I’ve always wanted this too. Erik, I’m dick-hungry and I need it. Show me?

Her eyes closed.

“Why are you so damn thick?” His breathing was ragged.

“Genetics,” she answered sarcastically.

Erik kisses his teeth, “You’re so damn uptight. Loosen the fuck up before I make you.”

“Erik, please-“

“Nah, I want you to stop acting all shy. It’s me, Erik, your best friend for like, 15 years?”

But,” Y/N licked her dry lips, “My best friend is getting...getting hard because of me. It’s...I can’t even think straight.”

Erik grabs her chin, making her look at him. When she did, she saw all of the desire in his eyes. Raw, uncontrollable, desire. It stunned her. Now, Y/N couldn’t look away. He wasn’t giving her an annoyed look like he usually would. He wasn’t ready to burst into a laughing fit as if to say “gotcha”. Y/N knew he was dead serious. She felt her body relax against his. This was Erik. She could be open with him and honest.

“Erik...,” Y/N looked from her thigh to his face, “I’m not gonna lie...I’m nervous.”

“I know. That’s why I want you to loosen up. We don’t even gotta have sex-“

“No, no. I want to.” Y/N felt her body shivering.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I do want you to be my first. I can’t think of anybody else...”

There was silence for a moment. Erik and Y/N just stared at each other. They were silently accepting what the next move would be. Kiss. Undress. Touch. Lick. Suck. Fuck.

“I got you,” Erik kisses her forehead, “I promise it’ll be amazing. None of that wack shit. I want my best friend to have a memorable first time.”

“Okay,” Y/N spoke with a soft voice.

“Okay,” Erik let go of Y/N’s wrists above her head slowly. Her hands came down at her sides. Erik watched her for a moment to see if she would change her mind but Y/N waited patiently for Erik to make the first move. Any move. Erik’s eyes admired Y/N. Full lips, prominent brown eyes, round nose, head full of kinky curly hair that frizzed at the ends because she picked it out. Now, his eyes were staring at the silhouette of her body. Curvy, soft, chocolate. Everything that he loved. Everything he wanted to eat, suck, lick, bite, fuck. Erik reaches his left hand up to Y/Ns face. Using just his fingertips, Erik strokes Y/N from her forehead down to her chin. His thumb would delicately touch her cheek while he gazed into her eyes to watch her every reaction.

“You’re so beautiful Thickums,” Erik smiles.

“Thanks, E,” she bashfully looked down.

“Especially those lips,” Erik bit his lip, “Those lips looking really juicy.”

“Oh gosh,” Y/N giggles while biting her lip.

“Stop, STOP,” Erik deepens his voice, “I’m supposed to bite that lip.”

Y/N slowly dragged her lip from between her teeth. The moment her spit covered lip released, Erik takes his teeth to bit her lip lightly. Y/N’s body jumped. She wasn’t used to that type of contact. Of course, she kissed guys before but never like this. Erik’s lips sucked her bottom lip into his mouth. Y/N could taste the Hennessy on his tongue. His tongue was so warm and silky smooth. Each time he dragged his tongue along her bottom lip, Y/N would take her fists to grip Erik’s shirt tightly.

“You’re gonna let me stick my tongue down your throat, Y/N?”

“Y-yes.”

Erik gripped her neck lightly, taking his much fuller lips to mold with Y/N’s. He took her breath away each time he kissed. Y/N brought her hands up to hold Erik’s face, closing her eyes to relish at the moment. She couldn’t look at him while they kissed. It was too intense. Erik didn’t even speak, his body did all the talking. Grinding his iron-hard dick into her thigh, grunting into her mouth, tongue wiggling in her mouth, hands coming down to wrap around her waist, pulling her into his solid chest. He could feel her nipples through her Demi bra and thin white top.

“Erik,” Y/N stopped kissing Erik to breathe and lick her swollen lips, “I can’t believe we’re doing this.”

“I can’t either,” Erik reaches up to grab her left breast, “but I like this shit. My dick is...so stiff.”

“I know,” Y/N whispered.

“Look, let me show you.”

Erik sat on his knees. Y/N watched with low eyes as Erik unbuttons his jeans. Then comes the zipper. The one barrier keeping that long dick away from her. Erik takes his shirt to rest under his chin, his hands sliding into his jeans and briefs, pulling them down in one clean motion. Her gasp and wide eyes were the reactions that he wanted. Y/N covered her mouth, her eyes never leaving Erik’s dick. Long, girthy, smooth, groomed, chocolate, veins protruding through his skin, tip shiny from his precum, Y/N was blown away. 

“You see how hard my dick is?” Erik moved his hips to make his dick bounce, “I’m so hard, bestie.”

“Um,” Y/N licked her lips, “It’s nice, Erik...it’s...a lot of dick.”

Both of them laugh.

“Yeah,” Erik grabs Y/N’s hand, “touch my dick, Thickums.”

“I’m scared,” Y/N nervously laughs.

“It’s okay, relax, ma. Didn’t I tell you I got you?”

“Yeah…,” Y/N looked up at Erik through her lashes.

“So let me take care of you,” Erik rubs her hand with his thumb, “Here,” he spoke softly. 

Erik wrapped Y/N’s hand around his shaft. Her fingers hardly touched with her hand grabbing him. She swallowed spit, her chest rising and falling swiftly. Y/N was afraid to do anything else but the warmth and softness of his dick made her pussy convulse. Imagine all that smooth dick sliding inside of you. Covered in your cream, stretching you out, digging deeply, and making you cum and squirt. At that moment, Y/N forgot about what her fingers and toys could do. She wanted to find out what Erik’s dick could make her do. 

“Look at that little hand grabbing all this meat.”

“Fuck, Erik.”

“Don’t worry, just wait, you’ll be able to take all of this.”

“I-okay…” Y/N was unsure.

“That tight pussy can stretch, Y/N, before you know it, that pussy is gonna’ take all of me.”

She whimpers.

Erik didn’t say a word as he started untying Y/N’s long wrap skirt. He pulled the skirt from her body and stared down at a pair of yellow lace panties wrapped around a chocolate treat. 

“Mhm,” Erik took his fingers to play with the corners of the crotch of her panties, “This the pussy I’m taking, Y/N? This virgin pussy?”

“Uh-huh,” she spoke timidly.

“Uh-huh is right,” Erik leaned down to her again, Y/N’s hand still wrapped around his dick, “I’m eating your pussy too.”

“Okay, you can eat my pussy,” She nibbled on her bottom lip.

“You can eat my pussy,” Erik mocked her sweet voice, “Damn, just like that, huh?”

“Yeah,” Her voice was shaky.

“Bet,” Erik grabbed the end of Y/N’s shirt. He pulled it up past her belly and then over her bra. She had on a brown Demi bra. 

“Damn, nice full titties, ma,” He pulled down the straps and watched each fleshy mound pop out with hard Hershey kiss nipples. Y/N closed her eyes, skin heated from Erik using his thumbs to pluck her nipples and twirl them. Erik then pulled her nipples and shook her breasts, releasing them and watching them bounce. Y/N’s deep breaths became louder and louder while she squirmed beneath him. 

“Shit feels good doesn’t it?” 

“Yessssss,” She hissed.

“Ima suck em for you-“

“Please?” She reached out for him.

Erik wrapped his lips around her left nipple. He sucks nice and hard. She could feel her nipple repeatedly being pulled and suckled between Erik’s tight lips. Each nerve ending in her nipple ignited and sparked. Her thighs rubbed together, and her hands clawed his arms, mouth unhinged and stayed wide open with no sound escaping. So this is what it felt like to be suckled on? Now, she wanted him to show her right breast some attention. Y/N takes her hand to grip the back of Erik’s neck, pulling his face over to her other breast with a pout of her lip.

“Ha,” Erik looked up at her through his long lashes, “My bestie feenin’ already.” 

“It feels good,” She blushes.

“Mmm,” Erik gave her right nipple the same amount of attention while using his thumb to play with her left nipple. Y/N’s body arched and writhed. She ran her fingers through his dreads, pulling the coarse hair. He made her body tingle all over. Her toes curled and eyes rolled. If Erik kept this up she might cum. It felt that strong and good that she was ready to burst. 

“Fuck, girl,” Erik’s chin was stained with spit, “You taste like chocolate all over these nipples.” Erik licked her nipples one by one to give them equal amounts of attention. Her fingers in his hair were so violent. Erik could feel pain in his scalp as if she was trying to snatch his hair out. Y/N’s skin was at high temperature and now her thighs were squeezing Erik’s hips. 

“Chill out, Thickums,” Erik reaches around her body to pull her bra fully off, “That’s better,” his hands squeezed and massaged her breasts, “Give me a kiss.”

Initiating the kiss this time around, Y/N leaned forward on her elbows, sloppily crashing her lips into Erik’s. He softly chuckles, blowing air from his nose that tickles her upper lip. It was unhurried, steady, and gentle. Y/N wanted to learn Erik’s mouth and what he liked. Did he prefer for her to use a lot of tongue or did he enjoy the way she sucked on his bottom lip? Erik seemed to approve of whatever she did because he was grunting into her mouth repeatedly. Kissing him made her body have chills. Y/N felt like her soul was being sucked through her mouth into his from how breathless she was at the moment. 

“God,” she broke the kiss, taking in a deep breath. Erik trailed his kisses down her neck and back up over and over. Goosebumps rose over her skin and his hands stroking her shoulders didn’t help. 

“Your lips are so fucking soft, Mhm,” He nibbled on her bottom lip, “Why did you move your hand from my dick, ma? Put it back on there.”

Scared, Y/N grabs Erik’s dick again, testing the weight of it. He was so sure that she would be able to take him just fine but the more she squeezed him and lightly stroked him she started to feel apprehensive. Y/N’s hand moves down to touch Erik’s balls. She trembled, her breath coming out uneven. 

“Y/N,” Erik could feel her hand shaking around him, “Relax, baby, relax, Aight?”

“Erik-“

“Shhh, don’t talk,” Erik pulled at Y/N’s panties, “Let me take care of you, okay? That way, you’ll feel more confident to take care of me.”

Y/N simply nodded her head. Erik grabbed the sides of her panties to tug down her legs. Her knees quaked as soon as the fabric was down past her toes. She was now fully exposed in front of her best friend. Her best friend and now her fuck buddy. It was now or never. 

“Aren’t you going to take off your clothes, E?”

“Not until I’m finished with you. I want you to undress me.” Erik carefully placed his hands on Y/N’s knees, “I’m about to spread these thick thighs, ma, you ready?”

Dragging her tongue over her bottom lip, Y/N nodded her head sluggishly.

“Talk to me, ma, say yes,” Erik’s hands dragged up her thighs.

“Yes,” Erik was captivating her with his smooth voice. He can get all the pussy in the world with his voice. 

“Good girl. See? That wasn’t hard, Thickums-“

“Erik…,” She shyly looked away, “um...can you take off your clothes too? That’ll make me feel more comfortable if you're naked like me.”

“You sure?” He asked with a single brow upthrust. 

“I’m sure, E,” Y/N smiled, “Let me.”

Erik stood from the couch while Y/N sat in front of him. She helped him out of his jeans and briefs before tossing that on the floor in a wrinkled pile. Now, her fingers lightly pulled at the bottom of his shirt, hitching it up to reveal his scar covered abdomen and chest. Erik helped her out the rest of the way, pulling at his shirt from the back, then up and over his head forward. Even undressing him was stimulating. Erik was a lot of man. Able-bodied and powerful. 

“Lay back, girl, let me taste you.”

She could feel her body laying back against the couch but her mind was elsewhere. She was enthralled but at the same time, she was a nervous wreck. Erik’s strapping body hovered over hers for a moment before his chest touched her naked one. The scarring gave Y/N a pleasant texture against her nipples. His lips sucked on her throat before trailing down the middle of her chest, her belly where he licked her outie-belly button, and now all over her phat mound. She was smooth down there and could feel the moisture of his lips caressing and tasting her. She could feel her body thrusting up into Erik. Y/N’s heated eyes watched him push her thighs back gently so he could kiss her pussy lips delicately. Even when he kissed her outer lips, Erik could still taste her arousal. Sweet, syrupy, goodness. It was the natural lubricant that leaked from a virgin puss. Erik wanted to growl. 

“Goddamn,” He was fanatical, “This motherfucker tastes good.” 

“Thank you,” she withdrew her eyes from his, “It feels good...I like it…”

“How much?” Erik stroked his thumb up and down her pussy lips to rub in her natural lubricant. Each time he drew his thumb back, a slimy string would connect to the pad of his thumb from her pussy lips. Erik sucked his thumb each time causing his best friend to gasp with surprise. 

“Tell me how much, Y/N.”

“So much,” she said with a self-conscious voice.

“Girl...I’m gonna break you out of that shy shit tonight. Wait and see.”

“Erik, I’m sorry-“

“Don’t apologize. I know, baby, you can’t help yourself. I’m putting my lips on this little pussy and it’s too much to handle. Just know this though...I’m gonna make you handle it.”

“Oh,” she lets out a shaky breath, “You’re nasty, Erik.” She nervously bit into her bottom lip. He was too nasty. 

“This ain’t nowhere near how nasty I can get,” Erik looked down at Y/N’s pussy, “open these thick thighs so I can see this little pussy, okay?”

“Okay,” hesitantly, Y/N opened her shaking thighs. Erik watched her juicy peach span out for him. The sound of her wetness against the skin of her pussy when her lips spread had Erik grinding his hips into the couch cushions. Y/N’s pussy is beautiful. All that honey sticking to her clit, labia, and outer pussy lips. He didn’t even want to lick it up just yet. It was so breathtaking coated in her sloppy goodness. He remembers taking some chick virginity when he was in high school and all he wanted to do was cum. But now, he took his time to fully admire how beautiful her pure and flawless pussy is. 

“Baby girl...I don’t even want to ruin this just yet...oh my God-“

“Why?” She asked with a perplexed expression.

“Because it’s so precious, that’s why,” Erik licked his lips. 

“Well...I want you to eat it, Erik, right now, please?”

“Right now?” Erik smirked, “look at you, demanding me. How about you lay there and watch me eat this pussy. How about that? And you better not look away either.” 

Y/N gave Erik a nervous smile, “I’ll try…”

“Nah, you better do it, Thickums, you ready?”

“Yes.”

Erik adjusted Y/N’s hips on the couch. He got down on his knees and spread her legs wide. Y/N sat up on her elbows so she could watch him like he instructed her to. Erik’s hands smoothed up the back of her thighs before holding them firmly like he did when they were in the car. Pussy spread open and ready to be devoured, Erik started off by giving his best friend soothing kisses to her clit and labia. Y/N reluctantly watched Erik. She tried to pay attention but what she really wanted to do was hide her face with a pillow. She felt so exposed and watching her best friend kiss her pussy, her special place, made her want to shrink away. Erik is so intimidating and experienced, Y/N felt like she wouldn’t be able to keep up with him.

“Erik...Erik,” She called his name. He was too busy getting his lips covered in her juices. Y/N let out a silent scream when she felt the first lick. He dragged his long tongue between her inner lips and up over her clit. Erik repeated this a few times before looking up into her eyes. Y/N gave Erik a sheepish grin. 

“I like it when you say my name like that.”

He tongue kissed her outer lips on each side before placing that same kiss but slower on her clit. Erik had a finesse with eating pussy that Y/N wasn’t prepared for. He took his time to work her up to even more wetness and a powerful orgasm. Now Y/N was being needy. She could see her hips pushing up into Erik’s mouth each time he gave her attention to her clit. Even while he teased her she felt the full capability of what he could do. Erik didn’t even suck on her clit and tongue fuck her yet. 

“You like it when I do this,” Erik finally sucked on her clit and labia at the same time.

Y/N moaned, hummed, and sighed. She could only make noises. The vocabulary was a second thought. Erik wrapping his lips around her like that had her ready to scream. How could she miss out on something like that? Her clit felt so sensitive between his lips. 

“Answer me, ma, talk to me.” Erik did it again.

Y/N shook her head no with a pout of her bottom lip. 

“We gotta talk to each other, bestie. You don’t wanna talk to me?” Erik spoke with faux sadness.

“E-Erik-Umph!!” Y/N pushed at his head, “Ahhh, my God-“

Keeping her thighs back because Y/N was ready to smash his head like a grape, Erik really showed her just how nasty he could get. Erik used his whole mouth and all its skills to eat the fuck out of her pussy. He wanted his bestie to remember what that mouth could really do. Her arms covered her eyes and her teeth painfully bit into her lower lip. Erik watched her stomach flex. She was ready to fly off that damn couch. 

“Erik, Erik, Erik, Erik, I can’t, Erik,” she whispered, “It feels so good I can’t, Erik. I-Umph!, Erik!”

Erik allowed her to grab hold of his dreads to move his head while he worked his mouth. Whenever she would move his head to the left, he would take care of her there. The same thing for the right, his lips would slurp and kiss whatever he could reach. That middle is what had her moaning and groaning. That’s where she smashed his face into her pussy. His lips sucked her directly over her clit before his tongue rolled out to flick at her entrance. He felt her pussy tighten around the tip of his tongue. 

“Oh my God, ahhhh, Erik, it’s-I’m gonna cum-“

“Mhm, mmm,” He mumbled into her pussy. Erik stuck his tongue out and pushed it as far as it could go into her pussy before he started moving in and out. His tongue was so sharp, wet, smooth, warm, and textured while it fucked her pussy. Her clit didn’t feel left out either because Erik’s thumb would circle it and pluck it. 

“Oh, my goodness, Erik,” She gasped, “Erik shitttt, fuckkkkkkkkk, this is too much-“

Fingers clawing the couch, Y/N threw her head back. She wipes her face to catch the tears. That wouldn’t be the first time she cries tonight. The feeling was extraordinary. As if choking on her breath, Y/N felt her lower belly tighten and a feeling creeps up and over her skin. She knew what this feeling was whenever she rubbed her own clit. Erik reaches out to interlock his fingers with hers while he took care of her, giving his all. She fought to breathe through it all but the second her eyes rolled shut and the muscles in her body tightened it was all over. Y/N erupted into Erik’s mouth. Her fingers tightened around his and she allowed her tears to fall. 

“Good girl, such a good girl for me,” Erik praises her.

“I…” she didn’t even know where to start. 

“You came so much best friend,” Erik was amazed.

“Baby,” Y/N moaned.

“You’re a good girl, cumming in my mouth like that,” Erik soothed her pussy with kisses, “Are you gonna be a good girl for the rest of the night?”

“Uh-huh,” she cleared her throat.

“Because I gotta teach you how to suck Daddy’s dick, okay?” 

“Umph, Erik-“ 

“It’s gonna be really good, look at this Daddy dick best friend.”

Y/N lifted her head to stare at all of Erik again. He was pulsating. His dick was really struggling. Erik was much larger than before. Maybe this was his full capacity. Y/N nervously nibbled on her fingers. 

“It’s okay...it’s okay, best friend...I’m gonna take care of you, I promise.”

Erik stood up in front of Y/N. She moved her body to sit on the edge of the couch. Y/N grabs Erik’s dick, looking up at him with her innocent eyes to wait for his first instruction. 

“Good girl, now, you see Daddy’s tip,” Erik rubs it with his thumb, “suck on Daddy’s tip nice and slow for me.”

Y/N timidly wraps her lips around the head of his dick. She felt the sides of her lips stretch uncomfortably before he finally settled in her mouth. Her tongue flicked the tip to taste his pre-cum. More saliva produced after that. 

“Yeah, Good, now suck on it...don’t rush it.”

Y/N did her best and sucked lightly on Erik’s head. She worked up a slow rhythm to help herself get used to it.

“Tighten them lips, ma...yeah, just like that, good girl.”

She kept her lips snug while sucking gently. Spit drizzled to her bottom lip and fell to her chest. This was going to be a mess.

“Damn, bestie, that little mouth…you ain’t so innocent anymore.”

She was getting used to twirling her tongue around his dick and sucking on his head. Now, she wanted to give the rest of him some attention. Y/N lowered her mouth some more over him. She stopped to accommodate the amount of dick she slobbered on now. Her body jerked a little because she felt like she wanted to gag.

“Be patient,” Erik fisted her hair, “You’ll get there, ma, it’s too much for you right now. Take your time wit’ it...uh-huh, Hmph, yep, that’s what I mean.”

The sounds of her sucking made her sunken cheeks blush. He felt so good in her mouth. She didn’t want to stop. She wanted to take the challenge and fit all of him in. 

“Fuck, Y/N, look at you, still tryna’ fit more of me in there? Y/N…breathe through your nose, ma.”

She did, and it worked just a little bit. She wouldn’t be able to speak in the morning. Ten inches of dick trying to fit into her virgin mouth is a lot.

“That’s how you want it, huh?” Erik asked with a breathless voice, “okay...okay.”

Erik took over, moving his hips in and out. Y/N grabbed his thighs, closing her eyes to calm herself so her throat wouldn’t close up. She wanted to challenge herself while sucking dick for the first time. The sounds Erik made while he swiveled his hips made her pussy drip to the floor.

“That’s it, let Daddy fuck this nasty little mouth. I’m gonna turn you into a real freak, best friend. Watch how you end up. Gon’ have you sucking dick and taking dick. You like that, don’t you? Turning into a slut? That sound good?”

She nodded her head with watery eyes.

“I’m gonna train you so well. Before you know it, you’ll be able to swallow this dick just like I like. And for that puss,” Erik reaches down to slap her pussy, “that little motherfucker gon’ know when Daddy in it, have you cumming and cumming fucking with me.”

Mmm,” she whimpered.

“Your jaws are tight,” Erik closed his eyes, “Goddayummm.” 

Y/N squeezed her eyes shut. Erik was heavy and thick in her mouth. She tried to be a good girl for him but the second Erik thrust his hips she gagged around him and slipped her mouth off his dick. 

“Shit, come here,” Erik’s eyes were dark, “Nah, your mouth feeling too good right now.”

Y/N shook her head, “Erik, I can’t handle it.”

“You were just handling it,” He was desperate, “What if I went slow? I can go in and out real slow for you, okay?”

“Okay,” Y/N wrapped her lips around him again.

“YES,”  Erik growled, “Let me fuck your mouth nice and slow.”

He went at a measured pace. This also gave Y/N time to admire the faces he made. Scrunching his nose, biting his lip, licking them too. His eyes were no longer a deep brown but more of a piercing black. He looked at her like he wanted to devour her. Not once did he blink. He’s so sexy. So handsome. All that beautiful dick in her mouth. All of this man standing before her ready to turn her out. 

“Guess what?” Erik pulls his dick from her compressed mouth, “I’m this close to cumming,” He put his thumb and pointer finger together to show her how close, “If you let me, bestie, I’ll cum in your mouth.”

“You want me to swallow it?” Y/N asked while staring at Erik jerk his dick.

“Uh-huh...swallow my cum for me?” 

“Yes,” She nodded her head leisurely.

“Good fucking girl, I swear,” Erik rubs the tip of his dick against her lips, “open up.”

Y/N closed her eyes as Erik’s dick went deeper into her mouth. His hands came up to hold her face while he thrust his hips into her mouth. His mouth unhinged and his head went back to stare at the ceiling. She could hear him mumbling something. Probably saying how good it felt. Now, Erik stood still, taking one hand to palm the back of her head, using it to bob her head up and down his dick. Y/N used all the strength she had to accept his rapid pace. He didn’t care about slow and careful anymore, this big dick was about to bust. 

“Fuckkkk, girl fuckkk.”

Y/N took it up a notch and grabbed his balls to squeeze.

“The fuck- Oh SHIT!” 

Y/N’s windpipe gave way to Erik’s dick. She gagged around him.

“ECHHH, ACHHH,” Y/N gurgled. Her eyes widened and blinked when she finally felt Erik’s cum hit the back of her throat. Thick, warm, tangy, it was a new experience. Wanting to get all of him, Y/N gulped him down while jerking his dick to empty him. Erik breathes deeply. She didn’t think it would end with how much it was. 

“Girl, I swear to God,” Erik pulls his dick out, “I bust so much, girl.”

Y/N wipes her mouth, “I know, Daddy.” 

“I’m Daddy,” Erik lifted her from the couch, “That shit felt so damn good, mmm. And you’re my little girl.”

Y/N thought about that. Being Erik’s little girl. And his best friend. 

“We takin’ this shit to the bed, Aight?”

“Okay.”

Y/N covered her chest, walking past Erik with a bashful smile. Erik reaches out to lightly slap her ass. That shit jiggled like a bowl of jello. 

“Take your hands down. What I tell you about that?”

Y/N lowered her hands.

“Go and arch over the bed. Ass up, baby girl.”

He wanted it like that already? Y/N took her time walking to her room. While there, she crawled on the bed, lying flat on her belly. She shivered. Ass up? How would she be able to handle that? 

“I thought I said ass up?” Erik walked in with his dick swinging.

“Umph, okay,” with difficulty, Y/N hiked her ass up and turned her head sideways to face Erik. Erik looked over her body before his eyes connected with hers.

“Now it’s time for lesson number two. I gotta teach you to take some dick in that little pussy. That arch...that arch ain’t good enough, ma.”

Erik walked up behind Y/N, grabbing her hips. His fingers massaged her hips in soothing circles. She closed her eyes. Now, Erik’s large hands were in the middle of her back, pressing down further. Y/N clenched. She never curved her body like that. Her chest was pressed into the mattress. Her ass was really lifted into the air. She shook slightly. 

“This is how you arch. Get that ass up as far as it can go. See? This how you bring that ass north,” Erik slaps her cheeks, making them sting.

“Daddy…,” Y/N spoke weakly, “I-I’m scared.”

“Shhh, cut that out,” Erik rubs her ass cheeks, “Stop doing that. What did I say?”

“You’re gonna take care of me,” She spoke with a small voice.

“Exactly. I wouldn’t lie to you. It’s gonna be your first time, bestie, and my dick is big. Once I'm there, you’ll be feenin’ so good you won’t want me to stop,” Erik leaned forward to kiss her back, “You’ll want me to fuck you anytime and that’s cool cuz I plan on doing that anyway.”

“I trust you.”

“I swear, I promise.”

“I’m ready.” She convinced herself. 

Erik got down on his knees to spread Y/N’s pussy open. She was still very wet but he knew she would need a lot more. 

“Do you have lube?”

“Yes,” Y/N pointed to her dresser, “In there.”

Erik got up to retrieve the lube. He found it hidden between her socks and underwear. Erik walked back over to her, getting down on his knees again. He put his mouth on her pussy again to warm her up to it. Y/N reached back to grab his head. Erik slurped her up all over. She whimpered into the bed. 

“Daddy, I love it when you eat me,” She spoke softly.

Erik went crazy. Now she was getting her pussy eaten from the back. Once he started he couldn’t stop. Y/N made the sexiest noises. Erik’s tongue wiggles everywhere and Y/N’s ass rocked back. She was going to cum each time Erik sucked on her pussy. 

“Ahhhhhhhh!” She shook, “ahhhh! Ahhhh! Ahhhh!”

Like before, Erik drank her empty. Y/N pulled the covers from her bed. 

“Girl, I’m telling you,” Erik rubbed her pussy, “I’m going to fuck your little ass up.”

“Please,” She begs, “Please fuck me, Daddy.”

Erik takes his fingers, two of them, and slides them inside of Y/N. She instantly gripped him. Erik couldn’t even get his fingers out from her vice grip. He was steady with his fingers. The more he stroked, the more cream spilled from her entrance and trailed down to her clit. When it reached her clit, the fluids dropped to the bed. 

“This pussy can’t stop leaking,” Erik wiggles his fingers deep, “I’m reaching in that pussy, best friend?”

“Yesssss-“

“I gotta stretch you to fit me.”

“Please fuck me.”

“I will-“

“Please?”

“Why do you have to beg me like that?” Erik grunted.

“Because I want you to pop my cherry.”

“Y/N,” Erik slaps her ass, “Say that shit again.”

“I want you to pop my cherry, Daddy-“

“Fuck, you know how bad I want it.”

“Then get it, fuck me like a Daddy is supposed to fuck me.” 

“Ain’t shy no more. You talk like that now?”

“Mhm, please-“

“Bet, I got that ass.”

Erik opened the lube, squeezing some on his fingers. He applied it to his dick until it was fully coated before sinking those same fingers into her pussy again. He didn’t go too deep in her pussy but deep enough for her to feel him. She wanted that cherry popped it was going to be with his dick. Erik stood behind her, taking his dick and bringing it to her pussy. He rubbed it around her clit before placing the head of his dick at her entrance. He looked at her tiny fuck hole and the head of his dick was bigger than that. He would really have to squeeze in there. 

“I’m sorry, baby girl, but you have a little pussy on you and...It’s gonna hurt at first, okay? Don’t be scared, I promise I will make it better.”

Y/N swallowed spit. She was panting like she ran a marathon.

“Y/N?” Erik asked with concern.

“Just do it, Daddy. Will this help?” Y/N reached behind her to spread her pussy lips, “Is that better, Daddy?”

“Yo,” Erik shook his head, “Oh, that’s fucking better alright. Keep that pink puss open just like that and take this big ass dick, okay?” 

“Yes, Daddy.”

“Good fucking girl,” Erik takes the base of his dick, then at a slow-going pace, he pushes the head of his dick in. It felt like he had already popped her cherry with the way her body jerked and how his head went in. Smooth at first then pop it landed right inside. 

“Are you okay?” Erik looked around to see Y/N’s eyes closed and lips parted. 

She licked her lips before speaking with a hoarse voice, “Yes.”

“Okay, I’m about to put more in,” Erik watched Y/N’s pussy slowly engulfing him while her walls damn near wrung him dry. She was so wet and compressed around his thick pipe. Y/N’s hands let go of her pussy lips to reach for Erik. She had her face smashed into the bed. Erik pulled back to the tip and when he did that, Y/N clenched up and whimpered in pain.

“Ouch,” she cried, “Ouch, ouch, ouch.”

Erik looked down at his dick to see a little bit of blood. He did it. He popped her cherry. Y/N breathed so rapidly that Erik was afraid she was having a panic attack.

“Y/N are you cool? I don’t like the way you’re breathing right now.”

“I-I’ll be okay,” Y/N breathed out of her mouth, “Just...just please keep going.”

It stung, and now her pussy throbbed with pain but it wouldn’t last forever. Erik was stretching her and she wanted more. Under that pain is a tingly sensation inside of her. The reaction to the way he glided in. If that’s what it felt like she needed more of it and now.

“I popped that cherry, ma, you bled out on my dick.”

The sound of that turned her on. He took her virginity. His big dick invaded her purity. She loved it. Loved it a lot. Y/N could tell Erik did too.

“Can I see?” She asked.

Erik walked around her to show her. Covered in cream and her clear fluids with a little bit of blood on the upper shaft of his dick. No wonder she bled out as well. Erik is a big boy. She was surprised that was all that came out of her.

“You like this,” Erik smirked while jerking his dick, rubbing it in, “I like the shit too.”

“I want more,” Y/N reached back to rub her swollen lips, “please, Daddy, I want more.”

She was so excited and nervous at the same time. Erik was behind her again, fixing her arch and adding more lube. She was already so wet but he needed to be sure she would feel comfortable. Satisfied, Erik brought his dick to her entrance again, sinking back inside. Y/N clawed the bed, before turning her head to stare forward. Her toes flexed. She was stuffed full of dick. Finally, Erik had all of him inside of her pussy. 

“Goddamn,” Erik brought his hands up to rub down his face, “Hold still for me, okay?”

“Okay,” Y/N rubbed the bottom of her belly. She felt a lot of pressure there. It was this damn position. 

“Gotta pull out some so I can get back in this pussy. You have me hooked.”

Erik pulled out to the tip of his dick, then bam! He hit her again. Y/N gasped aloud. He repeated it again, his hands on her hips. Y/N could hear her wet pussy covered in lube. After Erik thrust a few times she started getting used to it, arching her back even more and moving her hips. That deep pressure made her eyes roll. 

“I’m fucking this pussy up. You ready?”

“Y-yes-“

“Damn, I’m about to show you some shit, girl.”

Grabbing the sheets, Y/N felt Erik’s hands get tighter. He pulled out again to the tip, then bam! Back in but this time he knocked the wind out of her. Her hands came back to grab his wrists. Erik pulled out...bam! Her eyes popped open. He increased with each stroke until finally, Y/N was experiencing what it felt like to be fucked by a big dick. Doing it nice and slow felt good but doing it fast felt amazing. He made her cheeks clap against him, loud moans escape her mouth, and her legs shake. He brought his hands up to her spine, Y/N’s hands falling to the bed. 

“Nope, that’s not how we arch, girl,” He barked out, “I’m fucking this little pussy don’t play with me.”

“UHHH, UMPH, AHHHH-“ 

“Pussy so tight, give me that pussy,” Erik presses in deep, “still shy, baby? You’re doing so well, such a slut aren’t you? That’s it, keep that pussy open, fuck, you look so cute when you’re struggling, desperate mess.”

“Daddy,” She moaned. Sniffling back tears, Y/N tried to be a good girl but damn he was banging that thing to death. 

“I fucking love hearing you struggle.”

Y/N was crying and drooling.

“Can you take some more?” 

Y/N quickly shook her head no but Erik lifted her ass up more and kept pounding anyway. When he did that, he stroked her G spot. Y/N couldn’t pull away even if she tried, Erik had her arms. 

“Daddy! Daddy! Please! Cum, Daddy! Please cum! I can’t take it!-“

Instead of him cumming, Y/N spasms, her eyes rolled almost to the whites and she leaked all over his dick. It happened so suddenly. She didn’t see it coming to be able to prepare herself for it. Now, her pussy felt overworked. Erik pulled his dick out of her. Y/N fell flat on her stomach while her body quivered. 

“Flip over, baby, I’m not finished with you yet,” Erik strokes his wet hard dick. 

“Daddy...I don’t know if I can take anymore.”

“You can, and you will. Flip over.”

Y/N flips over onto her back. Her curly bush was matted to her head and her face was stained with tears. Erik grabs her thighs, bringing them over his shoulders. When he did that, her pussy lips spread and she could feel it convulse with need even though it was sore and thoroughly fucked. 

“Now you get to see how my dick gets all this pussy.”

“Erik...please be gentle.” 

“I’ll try but I’m not making any promises.”

Y/N was in another dimension. Erik put his dick in and basically said fuck gentle. One clean thrust of all his long dick had Y/N gasping for air. Her hands came up to push into Erik’s chest but there was no use, her arms were like noodles. She looked around the room with wary eyes. He didn’t go too fast and he didn’t go too slow. She found herself staring down at Erik’s dick and the view had her in a trance. She would have never thought that all of him could fit inside of her. Y/N locked her ankles and wrapped her arms around Erik’s neck. She wanted to kiss him. He understood what that meant, bringing his lips to hers and took her breath away. It was sloppy and passionate while he was inside of her. The minute Erik’s hips smacked against hers loudly Y/N broke the kiss to moan. Erik took that opportunity to ruin her further. He sat up on his hands and fucked her just like he was fucking her from the back. Hard and long. 

“Erik! Pleaseee! Just cum, Daddy! Cum! It’s so big and it’s too much!” 

“Whatever Daddy wants, Daddy gets, ma-“

“Oh my God-“

“Fuck, baby, you feel so good,” Erik leans down to kiss her throat, “But you gotta stop moving and be a good girl for me, okay?”

Y/N quickly nodded her head. She wanted him to cum badly, that’s how sensitive she is. His dick would drag over her G spot, causing her to tear up. 

“Look at me.” 

Y/N looked up at Erik.

“Go ahead, cum on this Daddy dick.”

She exploded. 

“Good girl, now...let Daddy cum all over you.”

“Please-“

“Can I cum on these big titties?”

“Umph, yes-“

“You gotta say it, Thickums, tell me where you want me to cum?”

“I-I want you to c-cum on my big t-titties.”

“Yes-yes, baby, let me cum on you. Your pussy making me do this. I don’t ever wanna’ catch you giving this good tight pussy to another nigga, understand me?”

“YES!” 

“You’re mine now. Make Daddy happy, baby.”

“Fuck, Daddy,” Y/N let out a sigh when Erik slowed down. His jaw tightened right along with his balls. He was really holding off his cum to feel her more. If she was his and only his, then he would have her pussy anytime. He didn’t need to hold off when he would be cumming again because of her sweet little pussy. 

“Come here,” Erik hooked his hands under her ass, “Come to Daddy, baby.” He said with a gruff tone.

“BABY!!!”

“FUCKKKK! Y/N FUCKKKK!”

Erik slips out dragging his dick up to her breasts and shooting a hefty load over her nipples. He jerked and jerked as Y/N watched ropes and streams of cum shoot out and hit its target. He finally stopped cumming, a long string left over and oozing from his dick. 

“S-suck Daddy dick, baby girl, clean up the m-mess you made,” Erik could barely talk after that big ass nut, “Clean up your fucking mess. All this because of that g-good pussy.”

Y/N wasted no time. She grabbed Erik’s dick up, opened her lips wide, and wrapped her them around him nice and tight. She could taste his cum on the head of his dick and her cum on his shaft. Erik was covered in it all. Y/N didn’t even need to be told to grab Erik’s balls. She squeezed them while sucking his dick. Erik was still iron-hard and ready to fuck. His limitless dick wanted more and more of her. She could tell because of his pitch-black irises. The killer look in his eyes. She popped her mouth off of his dick, a long string of spit hanging from her bottom lip while her innocent eyes cowardly gazed up at him.

“I don’t know what it is right now...but I feel like thumping that ass real good.”

“W-why?!” Y/N clenched her ass cheeks.

“It’s the way you’re looking up at me, girl. I really wanna spank that ass. Make you cry.”

“Erik, no,” Y/N shook her head, “You are too much.” 

“You want it,” Erik smiles at her darkly, “You would like that, wouldn’t you? Be polite and ask nicely.” 

Y/N was back to being faint-hearted. This was Killmonger. One taste of Y/N’s pussy and now he was giving her evil looks and commands. 

“Spank me, Daddy?” She spoke with a fearful tone.

“I can’t hear you, baby, what is it that you want?”

“Spank me.”

“Turn that ass over and arch your back.”

Y/N turned over and arched her back again. She flexed her neck to look back at him. 

“That’s how I want you. Look back at me while I pop this big ol’ ass on you, girl.”

“Daddy...what did I do to deserve this?” Y/N was scared stiff.

“Making me cum like that, had a nigga stumbling over his words like you’re in charge. I’m in charge. Hear me?”

“Yes.”

Erik’s hand painfully struck Y/N’s ass without warning, “Good girl.”

She instantly screamed. 

“I’m gonna turn you into my trained little slut, do you fucking hear me?”

“Yes!” THWACK, “YES YES!”

THWACK THWACK THWACK.

“Turn your little ass out, make you a slut for this Daddy dick. This is your dick now, slut, this is what you cumming on, okay?!”

“YESS, pleaseeeee.”

THWACK THWACK. Y/N’s legs shook tremendously. She no longer has pain receptors in her ass. She was going numb to his spanking.

“You like my cum on your tits?” THWACK, “Do you like my nut on your tits?”

“Ughhhh yesssss.” 

“Daddy’s pretty little slut. Not a virgin no more, huh? I took that shit didn’t I?”

“Yesssss,” She cried.

“I popped that cherry and took that tight puss. I made that shit mine, am I right?”

“Daddy, yess,” THWACK, “Oh, gosh, Daddy-“

“Does it scare you that I could do anything to you right now? Like, take that puss again? Fuck that puss and make you scream?”

“Oh, Gosh- OH MY GOODNESS!!!” 

Erik’s dick was in her again.

“DADDY!”

“What’s wrong, baby? Finding it hard to focus?”

“Umph! Umph!”

“Yes, moan like that. Yessss, you sound so fucking sexy.”

“AHHHHHH-“ 

You know what’s good? When someone with nice big hands is making you moan while they fuck you but the second you let out a sound they immediately cover your mouth and tell you to…

“Shut up,” Erik commands. 

That’s what’s good. Y/N’s eyes rolled when Erik’s large hand with his thick fingers covered her mouth like that. Bonus points for him because he clapped that ass from the back while still keeping his hand around her mouth and the other in her hair. Now, he was putting his fingers in her mouth to make her suck on. It still kept her quiet anyway. 

Erik leans forward whispering in Y/N’s ear menacingly, “You’re fucking mines, yeah?” Y/N mumbled against his hand, “you’re a messy slut, I can feel you dripping all over me.” 

“Erik...stop,” she spoke with a muffled tone because of his hand. Y/N was done. She came on his dick again. She was afraid by the end of the night she wouldn’t be able to cum anymore. Y/N was definitely a virgin no more. Now that Erik took that pussy, she would be on his dick whenever he wanted.

“THAT'S it, baby. Feel good doesn’t it? Just needed a little more hm?” 

“A-Ah-ahhhhh,” she moaned with a struggle.

“What is it, angel? That made you feel good?”

Y/N nodded her head with a whine.

“What? Like this?” Erik thrust back in and abused her sweet spot, “You’re so goddamn beautiful. Fuck, I’m gonna cum again, girl!”

Two more thrusts in her pussy had Erik pulling out and cumming on her ass now. His dick jumped against her ass. He didn’t even need to jerk it, his hazy eyes just watched his dick jump and spurt out cum covering her ass cheeks and lower back. Erik finally grabs the base of his dick, rubbing the rest of his cum onto her ass. He stood back watching her body slump into the mattress. He was definitely weak and in need of electrolytes to refuel himself. Erik walked to Y/N’s bathroom to retrieve a warm wet rag to wipe her down. It was late as hell and she needed some rest. He would run a bath for her in the morning. He made it back into the room, sitting down on the bed next to Y/N to clean her pussy, ass, and back. As he wiped her pussy, heavy, drawn-out, gurgling noises came from Y/N.

“Wow,” Erik laughs. He laughed so hard his stomach hurt. Y/N was snoring sleep with her mouth hanging wide open. Erik put her to bed. He flips her over to wipe off her breasts. She grumbled and snorted. He forgot how much of a snorer she was. Erik pulled the covers to her bed back, picking her up and laying her in bed. She automatically curled up into a ball, snuggling her face into her silk pillow and reaching out to grab her large teddy bear almost the size of the bed that Erik got her for her birthday. 

“So fucking adorable.” He flicked off her light, pulling the covers back to lay next to her. He snuggled her close to him, his arm reaching over her bare chest to rest on top of the bear. As soon as he closed his eyes, sleep overtook him as well. 

@tgigoldie​ @soufcakmistress​ @chefjessypooh​ @chaneajoyyy​ @pananegra​ @theblulife​ @becincere​ @blaqqjacq​ @fish-outta-watah​ @eyeknowmywrites​ @crowngold​ @njadakillthiscookie​ @blktinkerbell​ @luvanxi​ @sheisexcellent1​ @chocolatedippedinhoney​ @brandithecrystalgem​ @dababydababydababydababy​ @soulfulbeauty19​ @btitannaaa​ @sunkissedebony97​ @youngblackndgifted​ @harleycativy​ @rbhp​ @thee-germanpeach​ @thadelightfulone​ @bugngiz​ @palmstreesallday​ @skylahb​ @bakaris-shorty​ @nizzle-mo​ @truglori​ @queenflaws​ @ljstraightnochaser​ @nickidub718​ @vikkidc​ @thehomierobbstark​ @rent-emspoons​ @abluestethoscope​ @abeautifulmindexposed​ @fd-writes​ @chasingsunlight​ @sickaddiktions​ @munteanhore​ @xo-goldengirl​ @tiava143​ @33kiara​ @honeytoffee​ @asiasblackworld727​ @momobaby227​ @informalmelancholy​ @soulshinechronicles​ @hearteyes-for-killmonger​ @goddessofthundathighs​

[khaleesiofalicante]

I’m going to be honest. I was planning on reading this yesterday but I knew that if I started I would stay up until 3 a.m and I had school tomorrow 😂, but here I am:

“Rafael had all but screamed when Bapak had surprised him with the motorbike on his birthday '' It has only begun and I’m screaming!!!

“But Rafael had dressed up. He had even let Max paint his nails black.” I love Max and Rafael with my entire soul

“Max had a habit of ‘borrowing’ things and selling them on eBay.” I love that little shit and his mischievous 💙💙

Octavian was one of his closest friends. Okey but that friendship??? Love it

“Dude, college kids don’t give a shit,” Tavvy laughed. “You could walk into a lecture covered in runes, holding a seraph blade and they wouldn’t give you a second look.” “Cause they are chill?” “Yes. But mostly cause they are dead inside,” Tavvy chuckled. SJHDUEHISAM WHY IS THIS SO TRUE??

You should follow me on Instagram. My handle is simp_for_carstairs.” I’M LAUGHING SO FUCKING HARD 😂 😂 😂 “She is not wrong,” Lily nodded seriously. “I’m a Jem Carstairs fan first and a vampire second.” Me too bro

“I heard there is a dalliance between a shadowhunter and a warlock,” Lily went on anyway. WHAT THE FUCK??? I LITERALLY SCREAMED. AND I’M IN CLASS

“But people bothered anyway. People liked to bother about things that did not concern them.” I know this is of shadowhunters, but it really speaks of everyone

“Rafael was sure there was something more than friendship between them. But David was polite to a fault and Max was an oblivious little shit. So, obviously nothing had happened yet. Sometimes Rafe wanted to knock their heads together and ask them to just talk it out. But no, it wasn’t his place.” JSSUHDEWIMS. OK. if i continue to quote everything i won’t finish. Let's move forward

Me when i found who started the rumor: 🙃🔪 🔪

“What the hell? Come on, Rafael! Bros before…uh, girls.” I SHOULDN’T BE LAUGHING THIS HARD. MY DOG IS GIVING ME WEIRD LOOKS. A DOG!! Like...He makes fun of Max but he is also an oblivious little shit

“David and I added rosemary to this one,” Uncle Jace wiped his hands on his apron. “It has definitely improved the taste, hasn’t it?” I- I don’t know if this was on purpose but- I- Wow

“I am this close to kidnapping the twins from the academy and bringing them back home. I love Mr. Herondale to death but this is getting out of hand.” How can a line be so funny and beautiful at the same time?? 💙💙

“Empty nest syndrome,” Rafael chuckled. “I’m glad neither Max nor I had to leave home. My fathers are much worse.” He remembered his first sleepover at the institute. His parents had waited for “an excruciating hour” before crashing the institute and joining the sleepover themselves. HOLY SHIT THIS IS GIVING ME SO MUCH SEROTONIN THAT I’M ALREADY AFRAID OF THE ANGST

“David,” Rafael grinned. “Are you afraid of my father?” “What? No! He is just a regular person…who can throw me in the silent city any time he wants,” David rambled and then shook his head. “Where is Max?” He tried to sound nonchalant. But Rafael noted the way the other boy’s eyes fluttered every time he said Max’s name. Just the way a crooked smile appeared on his brother’s lips every time someone said David’s name. Idiots. YES THEY ARE😂😂

Ahhh yess. The angst is starting and it will break my soul. Guess I’ll keep reading.

WHAT. THE. FUCK??? HOLLY SHIT!!! I WAS EXPECTING ANGST BUT THIS??? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?? I LITERALLY STARED AT THE SCREEN CAUSE I THOUGHT I HAD GOTTEN IT WRONG!!! THE FUCK??? I JUST CAN'T PROCESS THIS.

“Do you people know Magnus could have destroyed the clave decades ago if he wanted to do that? EXACTLY. HE WOULD HAVE LET YOU DIE IF HE WANTED TO!!! I CAN’T.

“Of course you don’t see anything wrong with this,” Paige sneered. “It’s not like you have a problem with incest. SAY THAT ONE MORE TIME AND I WILL FIND A WAY TO GO THERE AND BREAK EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR BONES!

You talk about warlock corruption but where all of you when Valentine exploited Jace and Clary? Where was this moral obligation when Valentine lied to his children and played with their feelings as if they were nothing but toys to be controlled and manipulated? I’m sick of shadowhunters victim blaming children instead of holding people like Valentine accountable.” EXACTLY. WHERE WERE THEY?

Ok, ok, I’m not ok but I'll just keep reading. I’m slightly traumatized but ok.

For the next thirty minutes, Max paced around the room, threatening to portal all the shadowhunters to hell. Then he went on about a plan to attack the cohort and portal them all to hell too. He kept talking about portalling people to hell. I feel him on a personal level!!!

“Rafael knew he had the option of not listening to what they had to say. But here is the thing about people, they don’t get to you. You get to them. They simply say something and leave. They probably don’t even mean the things they say or lose sleep over it. But it wasn’t the same for you. You obsess over it. You stay awake at night and let it consume your dreams. And that was the worst part because all of it looks like a choice. All of it looks like your fault.” THIS!!!!

“He ran his hand through the boy’s blue curls. Max had his own battles to fight. But they had to fight together.”

NO. ANYTHING BUT MAGNUS CRYING BECAUSE THEN I CRY!!!

“Fuck everyone else,” dad growled. “They’ve hurt our family enough.” EXACTLY!!!

“He needed to survive this. So, he decided to go back to the place he had learned how to survive in the first place. He needed to go back home.” Okey, this was a lot and I need a moment and some therapy probably

“Camilla Alvarez.” Interesting

The texts are just *chef kiss*

“His father had done that. Alec Lightwood had helped Joaquin and his people create a new world in Buenos Aires.” I LOVE ALEC LIGHTWOOD

Okey, but all of that conversation with Rafe and Magnus was beautiful and now I’m crying

THE OUTFIT!!! MASTERPIECE

Blue banners when the lost return, the shadowhunter rhythm said. Rafael had returned home – and he was no longer lost. WOW. JUST WOW.

“I would like to propose that we include a provision on hate speech,” Rafael said. FUCK YEAH

Not to be dramatic, BUT HOLY FUCK!! All this Cohort moment really hits cause its what society is like

“This is unacceptable!” Paige Ashdown looked furious. “Lightwood, you can’t just keep bringing up new laws to protect your family.” “I wouldn’t have to if you didn’t keep attacking my family, Paige!” the Consul Voice boomed across the hall. “And I’m not doing this to protect my own. My family happens to be one of the many you’ve victimized with your vicious prejudice.” LOUDER SO EVERYONE CAN HEAR

“I’m the Inquisitor’s daughter,” she said. “Next time, think twice before you quote the law at me.” Hello? Yes, I would like to request a seat at the Anjali supremacy cause that girl is such a badass

She turned to the Council. The Inquisitor looked like he was going to cry from pride. Rafael’s dad looked half terrified but mostly impressed. Lily was blowing kisses at Anjali. The other downworld leaders looked quite pleased.“Over to you Consul,” Anjali gave him a salute as usual – and then she was gone. “THAT’S THE BEST SHIT I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!” Emma Carstairs yelled. “Goddamn, I wish Magnus was here to see this,” Uncle Jace grinned. “That was satisfying as hell.” “No worries, I recorded the whole thing!” Kit put up his hand.- THEY HAVE SUCH AN ENERGY

“He wasn't afraid. He still wanted to hold her. He realized he wanted to hold her even if it would set him on fire.” My heart, i just 💙💙💙

OKAYY. That was a lot of trauma, screaming, loving and hating. And it also came longer than expected but you can’t blame me!! I loved it soooo much, it was amazing as always

Now guess who has 10 assignments to deliver and hasn’t started them for spending all the time reading this?? YES, it's me, so I better get to work 💙💙

FIRST OF ALL WHY DOES EVERYONE HAVE SO MANY ASSIGNMENTS AND TESTS I AM GOING TO SET THE EDUCATION SYSTEM ON FIRE AND BUILD IT AGAIN FROM THE ASHES DO NOT TEST ME!!!

Also I am glad you enjoyed this. It is a very heavy chapter. So, do feel time to rest and recover.

I'll see you soon bebe 💙

[atlafan]

Take it Slow - Part Forty-Six

a/n: okay this is my first shot at a harry:y/n fic, and it will be multiple parts. y/n had a bad experience with an ex over a year ago, and finally accepts her coworker and good friend Niall’s invitation to go on a blind date with his friend Harry.

Warnings: Fluff and Smut.

Masterpost (all previous parts can be found in the masterpost)

“Hallelujah!” Harry hears you from the bathroom Thursday morning and he chuckles. “She gone.” You say coming out, dressed for work.

“Good, so I won’t need to use a condom tonight?” He asks pulling his pants on.

“Nope.”

“Thank god.” He wraps his arms around you. “Missed really feelin’ ya.”

“Me too.” You kiss him. “I gotta go.”

“Party’s this Saturday right?”

“Yup, hotel is all taken care of. I’m so excited!”

“It’ll be nice to get away for a night.”

“Mhm.” You kiss him again. “Hey, why don’t I come visit you at lunch today?”

“But I like comin’ to your office, we have way more privacy there.”

“You don’t have a break room?”

“We do…”

“So we’ll eat in there.” You shrug. “I like seeing you at work. You’re like in action.” Harry looks you up and down. You had a light grey pencil skirt on and a navy long sleeve blouse. You’d turn heads for sure.

“Alright, sure. Come see me.” You kiss him one last time, and head out.

//

You can’t wait to see Harry at lunch. Your morning was full of meetings, and your class was just about to start. You got emailed your syllabus and you were already feeling a little overwhelmed. You get up to the studio with your lunchbox and you’re greeted by the young man, Isaac.

“Hello, may I help- oh! It’s you.” He smiles. “What’s your name again?”

“Y/N.” You smile.

“Right! You’re Harry’s girlfriend.”

“That I am.”

“They’re just finishing a quick staff meeting if you wanna have a seat.” There were a few lounge chairs near the reception desk.

“I can’t go wait for him in his office? He does it to me all the time.”

“Well…normally I’d say yes, but these staff meetings can get kind of heated.”

“Who knew there was so much drama at a magazine that’s so tranquil?”

“Oh honey, you have no idea.”

“Because I think you’re a fuckin’ moron, that’s why.” You whip your head around to see Harry being followed by someone.

“I’m the moron?! Really? First you stick me with some little-“

“Stop! She’ll hear you.”

“I don’t care, let her hear me!”

“You’re such a bitch sometimes Mykenzie, fuck.” Your jaw drops. You had never really heard Harry talk like that before, especially not to another woman.

“My work load has essentially piled up because I’ve had to work with her. Same goes for Paige. I think you and Mariah could handle having some extra hands next week so we can have a break.”

“That wouldn’t make any sense! Neither of those girls are interested in the work Mariah and I do. Julia wants to write, and Dana wants to cobble the magazine itself. I don’t know how to use Illustrator, Paige does, so she can keep Dana. By the way, I haven’t heard a fuckin’ peep outa Paige, so I think you’re the only one with the problem. But I’m not surprised. You’re always, always the one to challenge any idea I have.”

“Because you’re ideas are shit, just like your pictures.” His jaw tenses.

“Get the fuck away from me now.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” She fake pouts. “Did I upset you, daddy?”

This is when you feel the need to step in. Isaac tries to stop you, but you keep walking.

“Hey.” You say. Harry’s eyes soften completely when he sees you.

“Hi!” He kisses you on the cheek. “I just need to heat my food up, we can go down and eat in my car.” He looks back at Mykenzie. “Afraid I’ll lose my appetite if I stay here any longer.” He grabs your hand and pulls you into his office. “Need to heat yours up?”

“No, I did before I left.”

“Alright, back in a tick.”

The girl looks you up and down and scoffs. You sigh and try to ignore her, but you can’t get what she said out of your mind.

“So, you’re the girlfriend?” She finally asks you, standing in the doorway.

“That’d be me, yeah.”

“How nice for you. Sure he’s a real pleasure to have around.” She says sarcastically.

“Actually he is. He’s the sweetest guy I know.”

“Rather short fuse, don’t you think?”

“Don’t see that side of him really. He’s pretty calm around me.” You cross your arms over your chest. “You were fighting over your interns?” She rolls her eyes. “I have an intern at my job too, he’s actually a really big help from time to time. It’s less annoying if you actually try to make the best of it.”

“They’re just so annoying. And all she wants to do is talk about him. Bad enough I have to see him every day, don’t really wanna talk about him.”

Julia was walking towards Harry’s office to ask him about lunch. She stops short when she sees you, but continues walking because she knows she has to ask Mykenzie about lunch too.

“Mykenzie? I’m taking the lunch orders.”

“Greek salad with shredded chicken, dressing on the side.”

“Right…um, hi.”

“Hello.” You smile at her. Harry walks back over cautiously, but furious.

“What the fuck are you doin’ hangin’ around my office for? Leave her alone.”

“We were just chatting, H. Chill.” He takes a deep breath. “Julia, didja need somethin’?”

“No, I can see you don’t need takeout today.”

“Nope.” He smiles and grabs your hand. “Be back later.” He says to Isaac. “I work in a fuckin’ looney bin!” He says once you’re in the elevator.

His car was parked in the garage, but it was still a little chilly so he turns it on. He cracks open his container and starts eating.

“You’re not eatin’ love…” You look down then back at him.

“Did she…did she call you daddy? Did I hear that right?” He nearly chokes on his food, and swallows harshly. “Sort of hard not to hear. You could hear a pin drop up there.”

“Then you know the answer to your question.” He was sweating. This is why he always came to your office.

“Mhm, so let me rephrase. Why did she call you daddy?”

“I don’t wanna talk about this right now, you’re just gonna get mad at me.”

“Harry…” You sigh. “Look, I don’t really care about what you did in your past, but…you work with this woman every day and she’s pretty…”

“Please don’t be jealous, I really can’t fuckin’ stand her.”

“Then why’d she call you that? Is it like an inside joke or something? Are you like the daddy of the office?”

“I wish that’s what it was. When I first started here we hooked up…on more than one occasion.”

“How does that even happen?”

“I don’t know, we went out for drinks, showin’ the new guy around that sorta thing. Went back to her place and so it goes.”

“Okay, but-“

“She liked using that word. I never asked her to use it.” You furrow your eyebrows at him. “You don’t believe me?”

“It’s not that I don’t believe you…I just know you can be kind of…well, you like to be the one in charge, so, I mean you must’ve liked it. And how often does she throw that in your face?”

“First time she’s done it in a while. She does it to get under my skin because she’s a fuckin’ bitch. I think she was hopin’ I’d quit or somethin’ early on.” He sighs. “I’m sorry you had to hear all that.”

“It’s okay. So…I have nothing to worry about then?”

“God no! I have absolutely zero feelings for her. It was literally just sex like…years ago.”

“Seems like she’s not over it…you.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know, I could just tell by her body language.” You shrug, finally eating some food. “Lotta body language up there. I quite literally think everyone I’ve come into contact with up there has a crush on you. You work in an extremely feral environment.” You laugh.

“I think it’s because I’m so mysterious. I don’t talk much to the majority of them.”

“And when you do, are you like that?”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know…scary?”

“I scared you?” His face falls.

“Not necessarily, you just seemed so angry.”

“I’m fuckin’ furious. They’re makin’ such a big deal out of nothin’. Why bother hiring interns if you’re not going to use them to the fullest potential. Makes absolutely no fuckin’ sense.”

“You can’t blame them when even you don’t want to work with them.”

“I have no reason to. I prefer to stick to myself to get my work done. Besides the work they wanna do doesn’t even pertain to me, it would be a waste of time. Also, I really don’t need two little girls starin’ at me for eight hours a day.”

“Maybe you could do somethin’ to make yourself less attractive.” You joke.

“But my personality is also just so charmin’.” You both laugh. “So, you’re really not mad.”

“No, how could I be? It was way before we met, and you’re telling me I have nothing to worry about, so I’m not worried about it.” You finish up your food. “I know where I stand with you, I’m not threatened.”

“None of the people up there even come close to you. If anythin’ they should feel threatened.”

“I think that girl Julia does. She stopped short when she saw me, and cautiously approached. Very interesting.”

“Want some gum?”

“Please.” He hands you a piece and you pop it in your mouth.

He looks at you and smiles, leaning in for a kiss. He sees the clock on the dash.

“Feel like a walk, still got thirty minutes.”

“I don’t have my sneakers otherwise I would.”

“Wanna come back up? I can show ya what I’m workin’ on.”

“Okay.” You smile and follow him back up.

Everyone was off eating their lunches so it was quiet. Harry closes the door behind him and tells you all about the project he’s been working on. You’re very impressed with his work.

“You’re so talented baby.”

“Thanks.” You look down at your watch.

“I should probably get going.”

“I’ll walk you down to your car.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“I want to. How else can I get a kiss in private?”

“Ohhh, I see.” You wink at him and put your jacket on. He holds your hand for everyone to see as folks roam back to their desks.

Julia and Dana are chatting with Isaac.

“I’ll be right back, just walkin’ my girl to her car.”

“Sure thing, H.” Isaac says. “Can you believe that woman did that to his neck the other day? She doesn’t look like the type.”

“Did you see how mad Mykenzie was after they left for lunch? Thought she was going to tear me to pieces.”

“I’ve never seen H like this before. He’s had girlfriends here and there, but none that he would ever let come here. Probably in fear of them running into Mykenzie. She really held her own though, I was impressed.”

“She’s super intimidating, did you see how she was dressed? So fancy.”

“She must work at a nicer office than this.” Isaac shrugs.

Harry gives you what feels like a million kisses before letting you drive off. He tells you how much he loves you and waves. He comes back upstairs and sees the same three people chatting.

“Did you have a nice lunch, H?”

“I did, thanks. How bout yourselves?”

“Yup.”

“Mhm.”

“Yes.”

“Can I ask the three of you somethin’, and be honest. Am I scary?”

“You’re intimidating.” Isaac says bluntly. “But not scary.”

“Do you all get frightened we start yellin’ about?”

“No…you all make it look so normal.” Dana says.

“Your girlfriend is really pretty.” Julia blurts out. Both of Harry’s eyebrows raise.

“Um…yeah she is, isn’t she?”

“Where does she work?”

“At a marketing agency.”

“Ohhh, so that’s why she dresses like that.”

“Like what?” He scoffs.

“All fancy. We walk around here in raggedy jeans and t-shirts.”

“We’re not really seen by the public, so it doesn’t matter. She’s constantly meetin’ with clients and what not. So she has to dress a little nicer.”

“Makes sense.”

“Now look, I know there’s been a bit of drama over the two of you this week, but stand your grounds. You’re both here for a reason and I won’t let those idiots ruin it. Has Myk taught ya anythin’ yet?”

“Sure, lots of stuff. She just has a sour attitude.”

“And what about Paige?”

“She’s been really nice actually.”

“Good. Ask for Myk, that’s just her. She’s a miserable cu-“

“Harry.” Isaac nods his head towards her.

“Thanks mate.”

“What are we all gossiping about? Lunch is over ladies, let’s get back to work, hm?” They both nod at her and disperse. “Have a nice break?” She asks smugly.

“Can I speak to you privately for a moment?” He gestures towards his office. They both go inside but he leaves the door open. He crosses his arms over his chest. “I just had to have a very uncomfortable conversation with my girlfriend because you felt the need to call me a certain name.”

“What? Da-“ He puts his hand up.

“Don’t say it again, to me, ever. All that happened a very long time ago, I don’t want it bein’ brought up again.”

“Why, it make her upset?” She says with fake concern.

“No, she was actually pretty unbothered. It made me uncomfortable though, so it’s enough.”

“Unbothered?”

“Yeah, it’s called trust, look it up.” He sighs. “Look, I get you’re annoyed right now, but let’s play nice, alright?”

“Whatever.”

“Don’t think your boyfriend would very much like it if he knew you were talkin’ like that to someone else.”

“No, suppose he’d have to teach me a lesson wouldn’t he?” She turns and walks out.

“Close the door f’me!” She yanks it shut. “Cunt.” He says under his breath.

//

Harry can’t wait to get home to you. You were fixing up dinner when he walked in. Your smile always took away any stress he might have carried home with him. Suddenly all of the times he’s come home annoyed made sense to you. You weren’t sure how he was able to get anything done with all those distractions.

“Hi.” Kisses you on the cheek. “Mm, somethin’ smells good.”

“Roasted veggies tonight with some rice. Only needs another thirty minutes in the oven.”

“Thanks for cookin’.”

“Course.”

“I asked to work from home tomorrow, this has been the longest fuckin’ week. He groans. “So I’m not gonna get up with ya tomorrow, I need to sleep in a bit.”

“Alright.” You push a few curls that fell onto his forehead back. “So…what would you like to do for the next 30 minutes?”

He grins at you and cups your cheeks in his hands, pulling you in for a kiss. You wrap your arms around him and pull him closer to you.

“Bring me to the sofa.” You say against his lips. Without hesitation he lifts you up and does as you say.

He sits down, keeping you on top of him. You tug at the hem of his shirt and lift it up over your head. You attack his chest with kisses and reach for to unbutton his pants. He lifts up so you can tug his pants his boxers down to his knees. You hike up your skirt. (You took your nylons off when you got home.) His hand grazes your center, and rubs at your already swollen clit through your panties.

“You’re already soaked, were ya thinkin’ bout me?”

“Yes, been thinking about you all day.” You kiss on his neck as he continues to rub you.

He smirks and tugs your panties to the side. You lift up and he guides himself in. You both moan at the contact.

“Feel so fuckin’ good, angel.” He says into your ear, sending a shiver up your spine. He nips at the skin just below your earlobe as you move up and down on him.

“Fuck, Harry.” One hand tugs at his hair while the other his clutching at his shoulder. His hand moves back to rub at your clit. He pinches it at first and then rubs down hard on it with his thumb. “Shit!” You groan.

“Like when I do that?”

“F, faster.”

Your mouth finds his as he rubs your clit faster. He swallows all of your moans until you have to detach yourself from him just to catch some air. He thrusts up and your back arches. He hit bottom just as you came.

“Harryyyyyy.” You moan out and tuck your face in the crook of his neck. “Fuck.”

He continues to thrust up into you, slowly, knowing that you were no sensitive. He just wanted to bend you over the sofa he could come, but you two still hadn’t gotten there yet. You had been so open and willing to a lot these last couple of weeks, but that was still uncharted territory.

“Can I come in your mouth?” You scrunch your face. You didn’t want to taste yourself on him. “Please, baby? Wanna feel those pretty lips wrapped around me.” You tighten around him, feeling aroused by his dirty words.

“But I…don’t you like the way I’m wrapped around you now?” You start to move up and down on him again. “Doesn’t this feel good?”

“Feeels amazing.” He looks at you. “But I really wanna come in your mouth.”

“But I wanna feel you fill me up.” You whine. “Won’t you do that for me?”

“Who said this was the only time this was going to happen tonight?” You bite your bottom lip and smile.

“So if I, shit, if I do this for you now, you’ll fill me up later?”

“Yes, I promise.”

In a swift motion you get off of him, and get on your knees. You don’t think much about the taste as you follow your cheeks around him.

“That’s it, takin’ me so well.” ­­­­His head rolls back as bob up and down on him. “M’gonna come baby.”

His hot come shoots out into your mouth, and you swallow every last drop. You dab the corners of your mouth for anything that might have spilled over. You stand up and pull your skirt down. The time goes off and you pad over to the oven. Harry pulls his boxer and pants back up and goes into the kitchen, grabbing you both a couple of bowls for your dinner. He kisses you on the cheek.

“Love you.” He says sitting down at the island.

“Love you too.”

Later in the evening, after watching a little TV, you both decide to go into the bedroom. You both do your nightly routines and get settled in bed. Harry moves to hover over you and starts kissing your soft lips.

“Harry?”

“Yeah babe?”

“Should we try, um, what Dr. Mara said?” He gets off of you and you both sit up.

“What exactly do you wanna try?”

“Well… like she said, we could just get into the position. I have underwear on and so do you. Maybe you could just like…press up against me or something?”

“Are you sure you wanna do that now?”

“Gotta start some time, right.”

You shift and flip over and get on your elbows and knees. Harry gets behind you, and you look over your shoulder so you can see him clearly. His hands grip your hips lightly and pulls your butt up more.

“Okay so far?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“I’m gonna press against you now.”

“Okay.” You face forward and brace yourself.

Harry lightly presses against you. You shift a little, but you feel fine. You feel him start to harden against you and he presses harder.

“Okay!” You inch forward. “That’s enough.” He backs up. You turn over and sit cross-legged in front of him. You take a deep breath. “Good start.” He sits the same way you do.

“What scared you?”

“I don’t know I got nervous…”

“I’m going to suggest something, just keep an open mind.”

“Alright.”

“So, like, you get scared because you can’t see who’s behind you, right? And you’re picturin’ him?” You nod your head yes. “And obviously it would hurt your neck too much to keep lookin’ back at me. So, what if we tried some of these things in the bathroom where we have that large mirror. I’m not even talkin’ fuckin’. We can literally do what we just did, but at least you’d be able to see me.”

“That’s actually a really good idea. Maybe we could try that tomorrow?”

“Sure, anythin’ ya want.”

He caresses your cheek with his hand, and you turn to kiss his palm.

“Thank you for always being so wonderful to me, I love you so much.”

“I love you too. We’re in this together after all.”

“Would you like to fill me up now?” You ask shyly. He nods and you lay back down.

Harry hovers over you and discards you of your panties and shirt. He gets rids of his boxers and his hands move all over you. His fingers run up and down your slit before going up inside. You moan at the way his fingers feel as they curl up. Harry should really write a book on how to have sex, he was just so good at it.

“Want you now.” You whine.

“Yeah? Want me cock babe?”

“Please, need it so bad.” He smirks and parts your legs further as he pushes inside of you. “Wasn’t enough earlier.”

“No?”

“No, it was too quick. I like when we take our time.”

“Got all the time in the world for you, angel.”

Harry pumps in and out of you slowly while his thumb works your clit. He always knew exactly how to make you squirm beneath him.  You couldn’t get enough of him.

“Yeah, fuck me Harry.” He plants kisses to your neck. “Your cock is so big, feels so good.”

“Love it when you talk to me like that, keep goin’.” He says into your ear.

“Love the way your hard muscles feel against me, you’re so strong.”

Harry’s dick hits your g-spot repeatedly while he rubs your clit. You start panting and wrap your legs around him tightly.

“Harry!”

“That’s right, say my name baby.”

“Harry! Fuck, fuck, fuck, nghhhhhhh.” Your nails claw down his back as you reach your climax.

“Shit, that feels good.” He says against you. You run your nails down his back again and goosebumps raise on his skin.

“You wanna come baby?”

“Mhm.” He nips at your collar bone. He moves his pelvis round in a circle and you gasp.

“Harry.” You start panting again. “Harry, please. Want it so bad.”

He thrusts in and out of you sloppily until you feel him press his hardest, and you feel the warm liquid shoot inside you. Harry pulls out slowly, and before his come and leak out of you, he presses two fingers back inside you. You gasp from being overly sensitive. Your eyes nearly pop out as you watch him.

“What, ngh, what are you doing?”

“You keep sayin’ how you wanna be filled up, figured you’d wanna stay full of me for as long as possible.” Your jaw drops and your eyes dart to his fingers plugging up his come inside you.

“That’s…so hot.” You make eye contact with him and he leans in to kiss you. He slowly takes his fingers out of you. He looks at you for a second. “What?” You bat your eyelashes at him.

All he does is hold his fingers that were just inside you up. They were covered in the mixture of the two of you, but mostly him. Your eyes dart to his fingers then back to his eyes. You look at him as if asking, you want me to? He nods his head yes. You lick your lips and part them. He sticks his fingers inside your mouth and you suck on them. He groans watching you lick them clean. You try not to focus on the taste, just the pure intimate thing you were doing. Something that would remain between the two of you.

[dolansmith]

Thoughts on the “Trisha Drama”

I’m going to preface this with my previous thoughts of both sides. I didn’t know who Trisha was until after I found out about the vlog squad about a year ago. I didn’t mind her, i thought she brought out an interesting perspective to the group. Then I thought she was literally off her rocker. 

I loved the vlog squad bc I found them in a really difficult time in my life and they kept me from getting too deep into a depression. While I saw some of their mistakes, I saw the best in them all and hoped for change or at least some kind of accountability. 

This is gonna be really long and idk if anyone is even gonna read this/care lol but Im just so frustrated with a lot of the people that are into the vs. Like after really looking into everything that happened, I felt kind of ashamed to be backing the vs bc they’re doing some fucked up stuff tbh. 

So lets do a basic rundown of mistakes made. 

Mistakes in their public relationship:    -Trisha: made sexual jokes about jason’s friends, started arguments about her insecurities instead of starting a conversation.     -Jason: made sexual jokes about girl’s a decade younger than trisha (and 2 and a half decades younger than him), would complain about having to go do things trisha liked doing and would pout the whole time  (i.e. disneyland and a couple of the hamilton viewings), would egg on trishas insecurities, literally dumped her on a daily basis and call her crazy when she voiced said insecurities and then would basically get back together within an hour and practically give everyone whiplash, also talked about her weight and eating habits CONSTANTLY (fucking dick)    -David: inputted himself in their relationship, recorded their fights and encouraged their toxic behavior to both his friends and his audience

Mistakes in the “official” breakup:    -Trisha: talking about jason’s ex and kids, comparing david to ted bundy (a lil wild but tbh not that big of a deal bc no one actually believed thats what she meant but anyway), the brandon thing (we’ll come back to this)    -Jason: continuing to make jokes about fucking a 19/20 year old despite his gf saying she didn’t like it, not putting an end to David “pressuring him” to making said jokes, the brandon thing    -David: ignoring his “friend” when she said not to put something in his vlog, putting his image and career first

Mistakes after:    -Trisha: constantly going on rants about david and Jason.    -Jason: staying in contact with trisha secretly. (ill get back to this too)    -David: putting his image above all else. 

Now we’re going to get into some uncomfortable hot takes. I’m gonna get a whole lotta hate from stans but tbh idc anymore

The Brandon Thing (I’ve done some digging since her video exploding at Jeff): 

   -Brandon began a relationship with a high schooler. She was underage the first time they had sex. There’s receipts and timelines set up. I’d recommend Petty Paige’s Youtube video on it for specifics.     -Lot’s of vs fans say she only brought it up when her and Jason ended so that meant she didn’t really care, but I’d like to point out that she has stated (on more than one occasion) that she voiced her thoughts on this multiple times to the group in Private and no one cared. Y’all are always going on about how she should say whatever she has to say in private but when she does and is ignored, what then? Just a thought.     -Let’s also bring the rest of the vs up in this. How come none of them ever said anything? They’re the ones still out here tolerating him. Pretty hypocritical. I’m not gonna aim anything at the girls bc none of them have Brandon in their videos but the guys? Jeff, Jason, David, Todd and I think Scott too, have all had Brandon in at least one video. They’re out here talking shit about Trisha amongst each other but are friends with a predator? Lmao Okay, cool. 

Jason Keeping in Contact for months: 

   -This was dumb.     -As someone who has suffered from mental health issues and has been in a mental hospital and suffered from attachment AND abandonment issues, Trisha would’ve been better off had Jason ended things and kept them that way. Instead, he ended their public relationship and friendship. He kept her a secret from even his “friends” and then dragged on their “friendship” for months. For what? He should’ve just given her her things and closure and kept it pushing.     -On that, why did he keep her belongings for so long and refuse to give it back until she said something public about it? He ignored her calls and texts about her very expensive things for weeks. Then she made a video calling him out on it, and she got her stuff back.    -I’m seeing a pattern here, aren’t you?

The Jeff Thing (did some digging on him too...by digging i mean google):

   -This one makes my blood boil for several reasons. ESPECIALLY AFTER TODAYS VIDEO. It rlly put everything into perspective omg.     -The starbucks story that Trisha told was the same everywhere: ‘I saw Jeff at Starbucks and said hey. He ignored me and was such a pussy he left his order at the counter after having paid.’ His masculinity is SO FRAGILE that he twisted it into ‘I’m not gonna be fake with someone who fucked over my friend. Can’t fuck them up either tho lol’ and ‘i’m not gonna make shit easy on you, i’m gonna make them feel weird’. What a baby lmfao    -His assault joke rubbed me the wrong way. I know Jeff’s schtick is the whole “I was in jail for a few months and I was a drug dealer I’m big and scary” blah blah blah. Listen, I’ve met men that have been in jail longer (he was in for only 4 months he once said I think) and had worse upbringings than he did and HAD to do some of the shit Jeff was doing (which lemme remind yall, was on his own accord). The men that I know that have lived similar and worse lifestyles than Jeff, would never and I REPEAT NEVER, make a joke about assaulting a Woman over “fucking my friend over”, when the situation was what it was. Which was: an exposé, basically. That’s some petty shit, it’s for the birds. (Also, Todd and Jay’s jokes about the assault joke? Ain’t it. They were just as bad as Jeff’s original joke.)    -Do y’all know what Jeff’s been to jail for? He tried to assault someone that worked at a 7-Eleven after he and his dumbass friends were fucking around in the store and got yelled at and ended up assaulting a woman walking by.     -He also talked about her mental health issues. Maybe he wasn’t talking about her specifically, but it was REAL specific. He said that it was crazy that a “psychopath” that’s been in a mental hospital still had a platform on youtube. That they shouldn’t have one. Trisha made a really good point of, “some could say the same about your time in jail.” Because they could. And mental health can be managed. So can your outrageous anger issues, Jeff. This was really ignorant on his part.     -I also want to remind everyone about the time he said he didn’t understand how men could be sexually harassed. That all you had to do was say no.    -He says he likes to “make things awkward” and make everything a joke when really he’s just being ignorant and doesn’t want to get real hate when he gets inevitably called out

Trisha’s “Dirt”:

   -Trisha doesn’t know anything that the rest of us don’t. We’re just all IGNORING it. Why? Bc David’s charming and Todd and Jeff are pretty? Ridiculous. This is the last vlog squad post i’m going to make because I’m done. So the following is going to be a rundown on the “dirt” on them that made me come to the decision that I wouldn’t be supporting them anymore. I’ll also put my own thoughts and comments underneath in case y’all are curious. Staying silent about these situations is the same as complacency.     -Brandon Calvillo: Covered this but to reiterate, he dated a high schooler and slept with her/dated her knowing her age. He then lied about it in a video to cover his tracks.           *I am well aware that she was months from being 18. This doesn’t make it okay. What does a 26 year old have in common with a 17 year old? And just because this is the first girl we know about, doesn’t mean she’s the first at all or even the last.     -Durte Dom: He was accused of assault at vidcon.            *This hasn’t been confirmed. But it also hasn’t even been discussed. This girl is getting hate from vs stans and the vs have stayed silent. I can understand not wanting to show attention to people who make accusations for clout, but assault is serious and should at the Very Least be acknowledged privately or legally bc it could be considered slander. Don’t let your fans (or your friend’s fans) do your dirty work.      -Jeff Wittek: He has major anger issues. Makes jokes about assaulting women after actually having assaulted one in the past (accidentally but doesnt take away from what he did) and has made jokes about sexual harassment against men not being viable             *tbh he has a “pretty white boy complex”. Meaning he knows that he can say and do what he wants and most people will let it slide bc he’s a pretty white boy. No education needed.     -Jason Nash: Is friend’s with a predator, is quite possibly setting an awful example to his kids, namely his daughter.          *Listen. I’m a feminist, a woman should be able to decide what to do with her body after she turns 18. But being groomed and hit on by grown ass men when you’re barely legal, ain’t it. If you want to and feel ready, there’s nothing anyone can do to stop it BUT 9.9 times out of 10, that fucks a woman up in the future. One day, she is going to see her dad hitting on a 19/20 year old Tana and see that her dad’s  26 year old best friend dated a 17/18 year old and lied about specifics and might think that’s normal and how men should treat her. I won’t support that shit.

And as for all the other member’s of the vs, they either don’t care enough about what their friends or friends’ friends are doing, or they’re not bothering to even consider it’s happening and that isn’t cool either. 

Be better. 

As for Trisha, she’s had her own faults and fuckups, no doubt about it. I’m not a big fan of her content but i FELT for her. Her name has been dragged through the mud because of this more than anything else and it doesn’t sit right with me when her only real fuckup in THIS situation was bringing the ex and kids into it the way she did. Everything else either could have been avoided or she had a right to say to the public since they put everything about the relationship out in the open as much as she did. If Jason and David had reached out and admitted their own mistakes and asked her to stop talking about them online the way she was, she probably would’ve chilled out. What happened, what they and their fans (us) have done has been nothing short of traumatizing, no doubt. The way these 30 year old boys (Jeff, Todd, Scott and Jay) are reacting to her? They’re the real joke if we’re being honest.

Note: I’d also like to say that if you do still support them and have differing views than I do, I’ll respect you and your views no matter what. Everyones entitled to their opinion and thoughts. These are just mine. 

[ethanlivemere]

Nobody asked, but here’s my opinion on the CATS-trailer

So it’s been about three months since the CATS-trailer came out and somehow I thought NOW would be a good time to express my opinion on it. It’s quite controversial, but have you ever wanted to hear what a long-time hardcore CATS-fan who has been wanting a CATS-movie for years thinks about it? Probably not, but I went and made this very long post anyway.

1)      Cast

Can’t spell ‘cats’ without ‘cast’ and there’s some big names in the list of actors they’ve released. Some are excellent choices, some are more… questionable.

Ian McKellen as Gus: Now this is something that makes me profoundly happy. Sir McKellen honestly seems perfect for the role, I mean, he practically IS Gus the Theatre Cat (maybe a little younger, and less feline). Great choice, looking forward to it. Judi Dench as Old Deuteronomy: Now here’s one of the more questionable ones. I love dame Dench, that isn’t the problem; it’s just that Old D is supposed to be a large, old, deep-voiced male cat, and dame Dench only fits one of those characteristics. Of course, they could very well change Old Deuteronomy to be the matriarch of the tribe rather than the patriarch, and that would probably be fine. I’m more worried about whether Old D’s singing parts (like The Ad-dressing of Cats) would work as well with a higher, female voice. And of course, they would have to do tweaks to the song Old Deuteronomy itself, and ‘Old Deuteronomy’s buried nine husbands’ doesn’t sound that great. Idris Elba as Macavity: Here’s one that I’m very interested in. I think they might give Macavity a larger role in the film, which is a big ‘heck yeah’ for me, and Elba seems like he could portray the Napoleon of Crime like the menacing figure it’s supposed to be very well. I look forward to both the portrayal, and what the writers do with him. Jennifer Hudson as Grizabella: There’s an old saying that goes: “a CATS-performance is only as good as its Grizabella”. Will this one be any good? I don’t know, we’ll have to see. The bits of Memory we have heard so far sound decent, although nothing will ever top Elaine Paige for me (as you will notice further in this post, I’m a bit of a ‘1998 video version’-purist) It should be noted that her design doesn’t look a whole lot like Grizabella, but that’s a different category. As long as she can deliver a Memory that almost makes me cry, then it’s fine. James Corden as Bustopher Jones: I know a lot of people hate Corden, but I personally don’t mind him. He’s okay in my opinion (I have never seen his late night show, so that might be the reason). Whether he’ll be able to pull of BJ’s almost opera-like singing is something we’ll have to wait and see, because I very much doubt he did the singing in One Chance himself. Taylor Swift as Bombalurina: I have no idea how this will turn out. She can certainly sing (something we can’t say for sure about a lot of other cast members) but I have no idea if she’ll make a good Bomba. Rebel Wilson as Jennyanydots: I’ll go ahead and say it: I wasn’t too fond of the Jennyanydots bits in the trailer. They were a bit too slapstick-y for my likes, and Rebel Wilson isn’t exactly known for subtle humor. Once again, we’ll see how it turns out. Jason Derulo as Rum Tum Tugger: Recent CATS-productions have been changing the classic RTT we know and love to some sort of rapper abomination, and many fans (including myself, as you may notice by that wording) don’t like it. It’s unclear which version the movie will be going for: Derulo certainly resembles the rapper version more, but what we saw in the trailer looks like neither, though slightly leaning towards the classic version. Let’s hope we don’t have to hear RTT rap his own song. Ray Winstone as Growltiger: Look, I have never seen or heard of Ray Winstone, but just seeing Growltiger on the cast list fills me with profound happiness, because that’s the one big complaint I have about my beloved 1998 video version: no Growltiger. Hurray for Growltiger’s return!

That’s the main ones I wanted to discuss. Munkustrap seems unimportant in the trailer (we’ll get to that in a bit) so I won’t discuss him. Victoria mainly just has to be a good dancer, and Francesca Hayward seems to be just that, so no further comment (though more on Victoria later).

2)      Character design

Alright, let’s address the elephant in the room: the CGI. Yes, some of the characters make me very uncomfortable. Yes, I hope they change some things before the final product. But what I want to discuss is the designs themselves.

First of all: head shapes. Apart from some exceptions (Grizabella, Old D, Gus) all cats seem to have a human shape of head, and this bothers me. Usually, Cassandra stands out by her head shape, and so do Cori and Tanto, but here they all have that shape. Usually, RTT has a very wide head to go with his mane, but here? This is my biggest problem with RTT in this trailer (ignoring the threat of rapper-Tugger): the combination of his thin head, kind of small mane and completely different colors make him barely recognizable as Tugger. Many cats look very different: Old D, even ignoring the fact that it’s a woman now, has completely different colors. The same goes for Bombalurina. Maybe this is the ‘don’t you dare change anything’-fanboy side of me talking, but in cases where fur color is the only way to recognize a character, this is a big deal. Macavity also looks completely different, although cool. The hat looks be a bit weird on him though. Also Mistoffelees has black patches on his eyes, not sure how I feel about that.

Overall, the awkward CGI and many changes make character design one of the things I’m less happy about, but oh well.

3)      Sets & backgrounds

I think the backgrounds look gorgeous, although some are very obviously CGI (here we are at the CGI again). But there’s one problem: CATS takes place on a junkyard. I know, obviously they would want to expand a little in the film and include more different settings, and I completely agree: I would’ve been disappointed if they hadn’t. The problem is that I haven’t seen a single junkyard in the trailer. We see streets, a theater, a fancy house, a square, a graveyard, a bar… but no junkyard. Some shots may look like they’re on a junkyard, but trust me: they’re either in the theater, graveyard, or the alley at the back of Bustopher’s favorite club. Again, this is basically me going ‘they changed something reeee’, but come on. It’s like if the Les Mis movie was set in Italy. Tom Hooper, do me a favor and include at least ONE scene on a junkyard.

4)      Story

The musical is, much like Les Mis, 100% singing and talking with music accompaniment, and 0% regular dialogue. From the line said by Victoria at the end of the trailer, we know that they won’t do like Les Mis and completely sing the movie, and I’m perfectly fine with that. CATS’ story has always been a bit unclear for a casual patron who doesn’t know the lyrics and deep lore of the musical, so I’m glad they’re putting in some regular dialogue. If anything, it’ll give us a chance to see the Jellicles’ personalities better.

But speaking of Victoria: it seems like she and Mistoffelees will be the main characters in the movie. This is odd, but understandable. CATS doesn’t have a clear main character. You could say it’s Grizabella, but she’s only in a couple of scenes. You could say it’s Munkustrap, although he is regarded more as the narrator than the main character. However, the trailer has a disappointingly small amount of Munk, and his name is very low on the IMDB cast list. The same goes for Skimbleshanks, who I’m not sure if he’s in trailer at all (unless he’s the cat with the pants) and is even lower on the list than Munkustrap, plus there are no trains or train stations in the trailer. Odd.

Anyway, back to Misto and Vic. Normally, Victoria’s only role is performing a couple of amazing ballet routines, but that doesn’t seem to be case here. I personally would’ve picked Jemima over Victoria as a main character, but I guess her design isn’t as easily recognizable as Victoria’s (have I mentioned how many of the cats look pretty much the same in this version?)

Someone who also seems to have a much larger role is Bustopher. Normally he only appears during his own song, but here he seems to be a more general presence. We’ll see how that works out.

Anyway, if Munkustrap is reduced to just being the cat who sings about the Old Gumbie Cat and maybe Old Deuteronomy, I’ll be mad. (AND THEY BETTER NOT REMOVE HIS FIGHT OVER DEMETER WITH MACAVITY OR I’LL BE VERY MAD) Speaking of Demeter, she’s also very absent in the trailer and low on the cast list. Guess they made Bombalurina more prominent because they got a big name to play her.

5)      Background characters (specifically Tumblebrutus)

As I said in the previous bit, it looks like many characters will be reduced to minor characters, so cats who already were background characters in the musical (like my boy Tumblebrutus) will probably have very little time to shine. I guess that’s inevitable, but I hope they at least make an effort to include the various background characters rather than replace them with generic OC’s. Luckily, I already recognized Pouncival in the background of one of the shots, so there’s hope. But if they don’t include my boy, my all-time favorite Jellicle, the best character in CATS, known as Tumblebrutus, then I’ll be even more mad than if they remove the Munk vs. Mac fight. He’s not on the IMDB list (unless he’s one of the ‘ensemble’ characters) but neither is Pounce and I definitely saw him so fingers crossed I can spot Tumbles when I watch this movie.

Conclusion

Am I excited for this movie? Heck yeah! Am I scared this movie might turn out shit? Heck yeah! There’s really no telling how good this will be (a lot depends on whether the final product has better CGI cats), but I think my viewing experience will be a mix of “Oh my god I’ve been waiting so long for a CATS movie oh look I recognize that character this is awesome oh here comes my favorite song I literally know this entire 2 hour musical by heart” and “Oh my god what is this RTT design where is Tumblebrutus why is there no junkyard why did they slightly alter this one lyric why isn’t this EXACTLY like the 1998 video version I love so much when I get home I’m just gonna watch that version again it’s much better anyway”.

Yours sincerely,

Ethan Livemere, certified CATS-expert and Tumblebrutus fanboy

[wolfpawn]

Once Bitten Twice Shy Chapter 16

Previous Chapter

Chapter Summary -  It's time for Marks wedding and Tom is Paige's date, but with the tension between them, they are finding it hard to work through things.

Tag, @wolfsmom1 @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog @damalseer @nonsensicalobsessions  @standing-onthe-edge @hiddlesbitch1

anyone else who wishes to be added to the tags, just ask :)

a/n plese note that Tumblr has not been allowing my tags to inform those tagged that I h ave tagged them so you may have accidentally missed a chapter. 

Paige looked at the RSVPs in front of her. Marks wedding was just a few days away. She felt incredibly awkward. Tom was to be her date for it, as would be expected since they were supposedly dating, the only issue was, he was now going to be in a lot of the family photographs and with New York just around the corner, the deal would be coming to an end.

She tried to talk it over with Mark but he dismissed it all with a mere joke.

“You said you were considering paying someone to be your escort for the evening, this way, you save money,” He had jested.

“Mark, Mum will force him to be in some the photos.”

“What does it matter? No, really. He is not ugly, even I can see that as another guy, you like his company and it’s not like there’s going to be some big ugly break up in the end, right?”

In all honesty, she could not argue his logic. “Still…”

“What is the deal, Paigey, you are all bothered about this.” Mark eyed her carefully. “Is it more than you say it is?”

“What do you mean?”

“Is there actually something more to you and your ‘Rear of the Year’ ass candy? That’s what I am asking. Have you two gone past pretending you were just a one night stand that got blown farcically out of proportion and become an actual couple?”

“No, why would we?”

“I don’t know, maybe because you literally are completely in love with him, maybe, just a hunch.” Mark watched his sister’s reaction.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Paige, you have always been the worst liar. I say that with love.” She turned to walk away from him. “What is so wrong with admitting it?”

“There’s nothing to admit.”

“So you don’t love him?”

“He’s a great guy.”

“You know that’s not what I am talking about, Paige. What are you so frightened to admit, what is so terrifying about admitting it?”

“What if he does it too?”

Mark took a step back. He thought his sister was being foolish, trying to simply act as though it was not as serious as it was, but seeing her with tears in her eyes, her words all but yelled in sincerity, that startled him. “Paige…”

“I know he’s not Derek, I know it. I say it to myself over and over but my brain just goes back to that night, to that feeling of everything crashing to the ground again and I never want to feel that way again. I never want to allow myself feel that way again. I don’t. He sees beautiful women every day, throwing themselves at him at his play and everything. I can’t compete with that. It would be only a matter of time before someone better would come, then I would have wasted more time and be burnt again and for what?”

“You don’t know that.”

“I don’t want to know that. I rather not find out.”

“Then you risk never being happy.”

“I am happy.”

“Are you, Paige? Can you look me in the eye and tell me your dreams of a family have changed, that you feel like it doesn’t matter now?”

“Things change, Mark.”

“Not those things, not that much.” He shook his head. “He’s a great guy and he makes you happier than I have ever seen you. Stop pretending otherwise and enjoy his company. You clearly like him and he likes you so I really can’t see why you would beat around this when both of you have the potential to be happy together.”

“He doesn’t...”

“Yes, he does.” Mark insisted. “Look, I asked him already and he said he was coming, so if you want to cancel his invite, you can be the one to tell him, because I’m not going to, okay?” He got to his feet and looked sadly at his sister. “Paige, we don’t all get second chances, Dad was lucky. You are not going to find too many men that well suited to you, it’s not mathematically possible for them to all be in your age range, in this part of the world, and available so don’t waste this opportunity to make yourself happy. Learn from Dad’s lesson. I am not risking Fiona, she is the best thing in my life. You do the same. He is your Fiona and if you are too dumb to realise that, then someone else will come along and snap him up because as far as men go, he’s a great catch and where will that leave you?” He left the room, hoping to have gotten her to realise how well suited she and Tom were.

*

Tom checked his suit was tidied and not at risk of creasing on the hanger.

He didn’t know why Mark was so adamant he go to the wedding. Paige had barely mentioned it, but he could hardly decline with Mark asking him to be there. What was peculiar was Mark knew the truth, he knew it was all a charade yet he insisted on Tom going to not only the wedding but the family get-togethers before it. Paige had mentioned that she was none too pleased about it all, when he tried to speak to her about it, she simply stated that it was boring. He understood such sentiment, he felt that way during his sisters' weddings. When he stated such, she agreed and spoke to him about it more but said nothing of him joining her for it. Mark had mentioned it in front of their mother, which he suspected that even if he had declined Mark, he would never have been permitted to decline their mother.

This led to a more embarrassing situation. Paige’s family, under the impression their daughter was in a long-term committed relationship, booked them a room with only a double bed in it in the hotel for the wedding. When they entered, he and Paige looked at the bed for a moment before looking at one another.

“If you hog the covers, I’m going to kidney punch you,” Paige warned. “It won’t even be intentional. I apparently do it in my sleep.”

“Are you okay with sharing with me?” Tom checked.

“Yes, you?”

“Yes.”

In truth, Tom was uncertain. Since the night at the awards, since the kiss, he felt somewhat uncertain of things. That moment where she was about to tell him something, he was certain it was something pertaining to them, since then, he felt uncertain, as though they were teetering on the edge of something more. He thought that perhaps she was feeling something similar to him but since that moment, since Oscar interrupted them, she never referenced the situation again, so he had no idea.

“I promise I am not too bad.”

“I know. We did share a bed before, remember?”

Paige swallowed. “Yes, of course.” She did not want to look at him as she remembered the night that started all of this, waking beside him, curled against him, feeling his body against hers after a night of incredible sex. She had thought of that night a few times since. “It’s looking good for your kidneys so.”

Tom laughed at her comment. “That’s a relief.”

“I guess we better go to this dinner.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry my parents and brother dragged you into this.”

“Honestly, I don’t mind, you came to aunt Geraldines for me.”

“It’s not fair on you though.”

“Paige, do you know what is great about you?”

“My sheer lack of giving a shit?”

“Yes, actually.” Tom nodded. “You are entirely honest. Take meeting my father for lunch, you straight up said yes to meeting him on his visit down for the play, but then declined him for dinner because you were busy, so you planned lunch. There was no messing, no pretending you could then suddenly changing plans, you straight away said what you could and could not do.”

“It’s better to lay everything out like that, and it’s handy. When you say you’re busy then, no one seems to think to question you.”

“It’s a good way to be.” Tom commended.

“Perhaps.” Paige sometimes wondered if it was. “We better get ready to go to this meal.”

Tom could see her apprehension. “Is it me of the meal that’s the issue?”

Paige scoffed. “Tom, you will never be the issue. If I could choose this meal or you, you win. You’re far better company, you are a far nicer person than most everyone I have ever met, honestly. It’s not you.” Tom looked at her carefully. Paige’s eyes on his. “Tom…”

He was on the verge of leaning down and kissing her. He even licked his lips to do so when there was a knock on the door.

“Paige, are you two decent in there?”

Paige looked at Tom for a moment, unsure if she just imagined what just nearly happened before walking over to the door. “Yes, Dad?”

“Dinner time, get cleaned up as best you can. We wouldn’t want to be late.” He rolled his eyes.

Paige smiled at him. “We’ll get through it.”

“I love Fiona, you know I do, but that family of hers…I didn’t fight that damn disease to suffer fools.”

Paige smiled lovingly at her father, the memory of the sick man sitting in their living room when she got a lift to Oxford with a classmate one weekend coming to her again. “Dad…”

“Now, run along.” He walked off.

“He’s terrible.” She shook her head. “Mum gets so annoyed when he talks about the cancer like that. He maintains that since he survived it, he can speak anyway he wants about it.”

“Understandable. So Fiona’s family are not as liked as she is then?”

“Fiona’s family have this terrible medical condition, it’s sad really, it’s called pompous twat-itis.” Tom chuckled. “How Fiona is related to them confuses me no end.”

“Now I’m just curious,” Tom confessed. “Am I dressed alright?” He dressed casually in a dark sweater, his dark jeans and favourite pair of shoes.

Paige nodded. She always tried to remain stoic when she saw him in such a combination, but it was difficult because of how incredible he looked. She never knew how a man wearing something so casual look so sexy. “You look great.” She went into the bathroom and tidied herself a little before walking out again. “Ready?”

Tom, who had been in his own head after thinking of how he nearly kissed her, looked at her again with interest. She wore black boots with her black jeans, which very much showed her body, which he had enjoyed previously and could not stop thinking about since. The blouse she chose was elegant and sexy in one and he loved it. It was the same one she wore the night of Ben and Sophie’s. “Yes.”

“Good. I better apologise in advance for anything they say or do. I cannot guarantee they will be very nice or perhaps they will be overly nice, I don’t know which yet.”

“Thanks for the warning.”

“Can’t say I didn’t tell you.” She smiled as they left the room.

[charmed1998fan]

lmao not 2 🐝 nosy but why don't you like Kyle?

I was going to give a short reply, but once I started I just couldn’t stop ranting. TL;DR: Kyle was a bad person, but the show treated him like a hero.

Keep reading for some Kyle bashing. :D

Kyle claimed to love Paige, but he had no problem using her to get revenge on the Avatars. He frigging shot Paige with a tranquillizer gun! And let’s not forget why hedid that. He did that so that he could kill Leo, Paige’s brother-in-law that she cared about. He threatened to kill Phoebe, Paige’s sister that she loved. He said that he cared about Paige, but his actions said something else. He made Paige side with him and against her family, which was incredibly frustrating; I love Paige but during this storyline I hated her. She was insufferable when she was dating Kyle, I swear to god.

Apart from his irritating relationship with Paige, he also put Sheridan into a coma (not that I give a damn about her, but itwas a mean thing to do). He was insanely obsessed with avenging the deaths of his parents by killing the Avatars, but the funny thing is that it wasn’t really the Avatars that killed his parents, but did that stop him? Noooo! At first, he didn’t see what happened, he just assumed that it was the Avatars based on circumstantial evidence. When he actually saw with his own two eyes that the Avatars had not killed his parents, he refused to change his mind about them. He still wanted to kill them. He wouldn’t even consider that he might have been wrong. And then he helped destroy Utopia! Literal Utopia, where everyone was happy and at peace, where there was no conflict (inner or outer) and no violence. He destroyed that. And why? Because he was a petty, selfish little bitch, that’s why.

But do you know what the worst part is?

That even though Kyle was such a petty, selfish little bitch who hurt people and used them and was obsessed with revenge, in the end the show tried to make it seem as though he had been right all along. As though he was ultimately a good guy. Pretty much the last thing ever said about Kyle on the show was that he had saved the world. Screw that noise! He doomed the world, he didn’t save it.

You want to know something? I feel like I might have liked Kyle if he had been portrayed and treated as a villain. I mean, I like Zankou, who hurt the Charmed Ones and helped destroy Utopia like Kyle did. But as opposed to Kyle, Zankou was straight-out a villain. He was literally a demon. At the end of the season, Zankou was vanquished like every other bad guy on the show; nobody had a tearful goodbye with him, nobody told him he had saved the world, nobody made him a Whitelighter to reward him. Zankou was a villain. And I like him the way he was. I don’t like him as a person, but I like him as a fictional character in a story. Unfortunately, all those things that didn’t happen with Zankou did happen with Kyle. His story ended with him supposedly being a hero.

To tell you the truth, probably my favorite fictional character of all time (nobody from Charmed, I won’t say who it is) is a bit like Kyle in some ways. My fave is petty and selfish and stubborn and obsessed with taking down his enemy because he wrongly assumed that his enemy had hurt him. But just like Zankou, this guy is a villain, and he’s portrayed as such. Now, unlike Zankou, I don’t want my fave to stay a villain forever. I want to see him redeem himself in the end. But if the story were to end by saying that the villain had been right all along, I would hate that. I wouldn’t be able to agree with that. I really love him as a character, but I don’t see him as a good person. For that reason, I don’t want him to be right. I want him to be wrong, and I want him to learn, and I want him to change. I want him to become a good person, but I don’t want to act as if he had been a good person all along, because he just isn’t.

If they had gone down that route with Kyle, if they had portrayed him as a villain and vanquished him in the end or let him have a redemption story IDK, then I might have liked him as a character. I’m not saying that I would have liked him (who knows? maybe I still would’ve found him annoying, maybe I still would’ve thought he was badly written), all I’m saying is that I might have. However, that’s not how Kyle was written. He wasn’t written as a cool, interesting bad guy, he was written as a completely unlikable “good” guy instead.

Kyle was not a hero, and the fact that the show pretended he was bothers me.

[waywardconsultingtimelady]

This has been bouncing around my head and it’s shaped into a complicated alternative universe idea. Cole transferred the Source to the wizard. The wizard leaves to bring back his kind and the Seer goes after him but Cole knows that she’ll be back for the baby. 

Phoebe knows that Cole isn’t the Source anymore and it wasn’t him choosing to do those things but she needs some time to herself so she goes back to living with her sisters. Cole helps her pack and she calls Leo or Paige who takes her back to the manor.

I don’t know how they stop the Seer from stealing Phoebe’s baby but with Cole’s help the gang manage it. The baby isn’t evil in this version but due to circumstances out of everyone’s control he’s born in the manor so he has a higher chance to go either way once he’s older. Maybe Cole discussed with Phoebe whether the baby being born in the manor would raise the chance of him being good or maybe he thought that was too risky as it might push their son closer to evil. Cole wants to renew his wedding vows to Phoebe. I imagine this could end up happening before or after the baby is born. He’s wanted to do this right after he was released from the Source and saw her because she deserves that and he wants to marry her as fully himself, but he also thinks that doing a heavenly ceremony might cancel out the dark one and maybe that will even help their son.

After the birth Cole wants the baby to be christened so he’ll be protected against evil. Grams doesn’t want to do it but it’s not just because the baby’s a boy. She doesn’t want to bless a demonic baby and doesn’t think the baby should have been born. She’s talked around, though it’s harder to do than it was in Wyatt’s case in canon. In this version by the time Wyatt’s around she’s happy to do his christening but Melinda’s born first instead simply because I would have liked to see Piper get the baby girl she saw in the future. I know she does eventually and I have nothing against Wyatt but she wanted to see her daughter so badly and she was so sure it was a girl when she was pregnant in canon.

I don’t know what the baby is named. Cain is coming to mind but given its association with Cain and Abel I’m not sure Phoebe would want to name her son that. Maybe something with a P and Piper is the one to break the tradition when her baby comes along. Adam is also coming to mind, I know it was the name of one of Phoebe’s love interests but he didn’t show until after Cole and Phoebe were broken up and that doesn’t happen this time. In fact since Cole was the one who tried to get him to buy Phoebe’s paper maybe Adam doesn’t show up at all. Instead when a witch starts using fairy tales against the sisters it’s Cole that she enchants and he has no way to fight it as he’s just a regular human without powers. 

Phoebe’s and Cole’s son isn’t the Twice Blessed Child but he does have a prophecy behind him. In canon the Seer foresaw something after all. If he is to turn evil he has a dark destiny ahead of him. 

When the sisters defeat the Source and it doesn’t undo wizards having been brought back. They were around plenty in canon later on so I don’t know why the writers claimed the wizard’s kind had been wiped out to begin with. An angel of destiny still comes to the sister giving them the option to live magic free lives. Phoebe asks if this will change her son’s destiny and the angel admits that it wouldn’t so they turn him down thinking that they have a better chance of guiding him if they keep their magic. 

I don’t know how Chris coming back from the future fits into this. If I don’t change the order of the births then maybe Piper never has her in Chris’s future. Or Melinda died as well as Piper. This would make Chris, Wyatt and Phoebe’s son the Charmed Ones or have the potential to be the Charmed Ones. Charmed Ones power wasn’t meant to be split between good and evil hence why turning Prue evil turned her sister’s powers evil (I know this is contradicted by Phoebe’s time being evil but the show contradicts itself all the time and this is an AU so Phoebe never turned evil anyway). So Chris and Wyatt are good and Phoebe’s son is bad, or Wyatt and Phoebe’s son are both evil or just Wyatt is evil. I didn’t realise this until I typed it out but I guess I’m keeping Chris good no matter what. He’s more developed than Wyatt so it’s easier this way. 

The Ultimate Power story line was stupid and would be left out. Billie being Paige’s charge and Christy having been brainwashed by demons isn’t a terrible idea in itself though. 

Unless someone else wants to write this probably won’t become a full fledged story but feel free to ask me questions about this and I’ll try to make up some stuff to answer those questions.

Edit: I had forgotten about some ideas. Victor and Cole bond over being parents to magical children while being powerless. 

I don’t know how this changes the Avatars plot line aside from them not bothering to try to recruit Cole. If I wrote this I might leave out the Avatars all together. 

[latinalesbi]

I’m new to the fandom. Please clear this up. Are you a blog about the characters or about the actresses, or both? Do you know Teri & Sherri personally or are these your opinions & others’ opinions & actual insight? Do you have any objective criticism you’d like to share, regarding Teri and/or Sherri’s acting abilities? There seems to be a lot of fans that believe these 2 people are perfect. In my opinion, I think part of the fandom has confused the characters with the actors. Thanks

qI am a blog about Stef and Lena and Teri and Sherri, mostly as they relate to each other. I am not really interested in every minutia of their career. I do not know either personally and my opinions are my own. I have accurately predicted the show in the past  because of keen observation.

I have in the past criticized acting when I think it deserves it. I think they are generally terrific actresses with much more talent than anyone else on The Fosters. I think people in general tend to confuse the characters with the actors. That is why I will always be primarily a fan of characters because people aren’t perfect and they make mistakes.

I thought Sherri did a mediocre job with the intimacy through most of season 1a. I have also objected when I detect more Teri than Stef. I do think they are quality people who upheld the integrity of the characters as much as they could.

Anonymous said:                                                                      The only Callie we acknowledge is Calliope Iphegenia Torres             

I mean, sure, I wasn’t a fan but you do you!

  Anonymous said:                                                                      I have to agree with the "disgruntled fan" about Teri. She did not bother with fans on twitter for a long time and then all of a sudden when she wants some money we are "family and friends". It will be interesting to see that once she has raised the money if she disappears again.             

I tend to think it’s more about the show being over but we shall see. I didn’t spend my money on her “friend” so I am glad she came back because I got some fun Sherri Polo interaction.

Anonymous said:                                                                      PP: ‘We told pretty brave stories on The Fosters, but there's no moms to save the day. There's no one telling you it's going to be OK. You have to go find somebody who sees you and gets you to support you on that journey," Paige tells us. "That freed us up for them to make bigger mistakes, have bigger victories, surround themselves with people on similar journeys. I am so excited what this soup cooked up to be." Dumping the moms freed them up- he is such an ass I tell you, worst of the 3 stooges            

I can’t stand him. The thing is, shouldn’t the mom’s journey have been as exciting. They’re free from their parents too. They could be having big victories too. I wish they were honest and just say we wanted young women being sexy because the network things that’s what sells.

  Anonymous said:                                                                      Logging off all things The Fosters,Stef & Lena etc for the next few weeks. The 1st ep of their new show will do well, people will be intrigued. The pushing of the guest appearances as if they are happening straight off the bat helps them no end. Still wish Teri &Sherri had said no to appearing, hate them being a side show. It still feels so underhand what went on. The rest of the cast deserved much better. They didn’t appreciate Teri&Sherri and bet they kicked themselves after Noah got popular.             

I have isolated myself well on social media. I barely interact right now anyway. I am pretty busy. Oh, I am certain that Freeform regrets the day they offered those two the show and not Noah. It makes me laugh. After seeing that clip, I can’t blame Teri and Sherri for wanting to work together again, but I can’t help thinking it would have been better if they hadn’t contributed.

Anonymous said:                                                                      The promo for Good Trouble is so contrived. You’ve got the interviews with the creators and Cierra and Maia sort of airbrushing the Fosters out of your mindset- Good Trouble a new show etc. Compare this with Freeform purposely promoting episodes containing the guest appearances that are actually weeks away from airing, its hilarious. I mean of course they would do it, why not, but it’s just funny. Watch Noah get multiple episodes next season if he’s free(they’re guaranteed a 2nd season it’s FF)      

Freeform is ridiculous, they keep promoting people who aren’t on the show. This amount of guests on a brand new show can only dilute the so called main characters, as yet unknown to the fans. They did this with the fosters in latter seasons but we cared intensely about them from the first season alone. I don’t see Noah agreeing to anything much next season. I am sure he’ll be busy.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Did you ever watch Life Unexpected on the CW? I loved it. The cast behind the scenes was what I believed the Fosters cast to be. I still follow some of them on IG and they all catch up all the time, young and old, it’s really sweet. I doubt this will happen with The Fosters cast. It’s really sad. Even our harmonious little fandom online got split down the middle. Brallie fans got baited, Stef and Lena fans sidelined etc. Long live seasons 1 and 2 the good olde days 😜             

I have not.k I don’t really watch much tv. Yeah, I think people didn’t walk away from the show with a good feeling and that’s mostly because of this spin off. Yuck.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Thanks for keeping us updated. Not watching any of the spin off. I’d probably enjoy it but I just can’t bring myself too. Anything Peter and Bradley are involved in now is just bleugh to me. I’ll wait for your YouTube clips :) Let’s hope we get some new projects from our favs this year and say goodbye to the sh*tshow it all became. Jx            

Yes worry not, Stef and Lena scenes will be available through my youtube or here. You won’t miss a thing. Like, not much will make sense because I am not watching the show, but just seeing teri and sherri together will be a treat.

[thelonelyrainbowguy]

Atypical

So these are my issues with the show “Atypical”, a Netflix original about an autistic teenager trying to find love.

While I appreciate that autism is being more normalized in media, what I absolutely despise is that none of the actors for autistic characters are actually autistic. That’s the real flaw. Nothing about us should be made without us.

Anyway, without further ado, my thoughts on the show:

* In the intro, the second “A” in “ATYPICAL” is written upside down, which perpetuates the awful idea that we are unintelligent and/or juvenile.

* I don’t know if this is normal mom behavior. I know moms don’t want their kids to grow up, but the mom treats him like a child, like he’s incapable of growing up.

* Instead of giving him a chance, she points out all the things that bother him and tries to dissuade him from doing normal teenager things (shopping at the mall).

* She also tries to pressure him into being bothered by sensory input (in the mall).

* She clearly doesn’t see him as a person with agency, but as a permanent child.

* She’s also a big “Autism Awareness” person who sees herself as an “Autism Mom”, and I can’t make the harmfulness of that make sense to neurotypicals (maybe someone can help?).

* The mom is just all-around horrible, but she’s supposed to come off as this great Autism Mom to NTs who watch the show. You’re supposed to sympathize with the crisis she has when she realizes her autistic son is a human being.

* The parents’ support group promotes high-functioning and low-functioning ideas, person-first language rather than identity-first (which is most commonly what actual autistics want).

* Sam’s therapist also uses functioning labels, which is harmful because it portrays a skewed image of ASD, not to mention it’s coming from a “professional”, which makes it seem even more official.

* Paige discourages Sam from talking about his Special Interest, giving him three cards at the beginning of the day and taking one whenever he mentions a fact about Antarctica. This is harmful because it teaches autistic people that others don’t want to hear what they have to say, and others don’t want to share their happiness or take an interest in what they love, and NTs watching this show may pick up this habit to keep their children/relatives/friends “in check”, to make being close to an autistic easier for them.

* She gets so far into his head with this that he checks the box of “makes me a better person” on his “Do I Love Paige?” checklist because she won’t let him gush about what he loves.

* She also pressures him to figure out his feelings - acting like she’s okay with him taking his time, then giving him deadlines. (I think this is probably more something about her character I don’t like, rather than something possibly harmful to our community.)

* She says at a couple points that she’s researched autism - yet when she goes to his house, she touches all of his things, refolds and reorganizes his socks, and takes things without permission, which causes a lot of anxiety in autistic people - which she should know after all her research. I’m not sure if a NT watching that could tell how much it bothered Sam and that you should NEVER, EVER do that to an autistic.

* As for Sam, I can’t really speak for his portrayal of autism beyond that it seemed generally pretty accurate. Every person on the spectrum is different - hence the term “spectrum”. :) I would have liked to see more non-NT behavior (more stimming, for example), because it’s important to show that not all of us look normal most of the time like this character does, but that we’re intelligent, whole, valid people nonetheless.

If anyone else has input on this, please feel free to add to this post. :) thanks for reading!

[soriseerakyra]

Until Death Do Us Part

AN: Last Part, first two parts  here and here...^_^. An anon asked that I do an alternate beginning where the boys find out first and I will eventually do that but for right now it'll be just these three parts. If you have any request for anything I’ll let you know if I’ve heard of it and if I can do it! Enjoy!

“Just sign the goddamn papers, Bruce,” She hissed from across the table and it caused the man to look up slightly startled.

 He’d been reading the thin lines of the contract in front of him and found his eyes stuck on the highlighted portions that had a large ‘X’ where his name was supposed to go.  When he married her all those years ago he hadn’t imagined that they’d be sitting here in one of his- no their conference rooms pounding out the terms of their divorce.

 He glanced up into the deep pools of his wife’s eyes and noted how coldly she regarded him, and how much that hurt. Her eyes had aged, she had aged and realized that he wasn’t the superhero she thought he was when she’d married him. He remembered how wide-eyed and innocently she regarded everything he did until recently. Even when she had assumed the role of motherhood she never lost the youth that had shined in her eyes. It was probably why she got along with all of the children so well. She related to them in a way that he never could.

 Her full lips pulled down into a frown as she narrowed her eyes at him, she thought he was stalling, and truthfully, he was. He’d seen so much less of her in the past months. He respected her wishes and had not come to bother her at the penthouse, not even when he was on patrol. The boys had taken it upon themselves to check around the building whenever they were out so he was confident that she was safe. When she would occasionally come by the manor, mainly to drop Damian off or to bring baked sweets she’d make for the boys and Alfred, he’d watch her from the monitors in the bat cave. He hadn’t the courage to go and face her, the thought of it nearly made his hands shake. He didn’t know if he would be able to handle her rejection.

 “Why are you making such a big deal out of this?” She asked after another tense silence. “All I want is the penthouse. You know I don’t want any of the company, your money, or that house. Just sign them so we can move on already.”

 Bruce looked at her pleading form and he bit the inside of his cheek resolute in his decision.

 “You know I’d give you anything you want,” he says as he picks up the papers from the desk and straightens them, before slipping them back into the manila envelope. “But I can’t do this.”

 When the words leave his lips both his lawyer and wife let out an audible groan while her lawyer perks up at the implication.

 “You want to take this to court, Mr. Wayne?” The woman, Ms. Thompson, if he remembered correctly, asks. “You know that can be bad for you.”

 He glanced at the dark-haired woman, her brow furrowed in faux concern. However, even as she forced her brown cheeks not to lift in excitement, she was doing a poor job at keeping her lips from curling into a smile.

 “She’s right Mr. Wayne,” Clarence Paige, his lawyer, nodded, his gray hair standing slightly on end. “No pre-nup, she’s worked here on your behalf for years, and she had to give up her own career. The judge will say that you impeded her ability for independence, they’ll give her half.”

 “That’s fine,” Bruce says leaning back as he watches the others in the room react to the news. He lets a charming smile curl across his face as his wife regards him skeptically. “I don’t plan on getting divorced.”

She doesn’t react to the statement at first, he isn’t sure she comprehended what he was saying, and when it clicks the skin around her nose scrunches in irritation, and he can’t help but chuckle.

 “This isn’t funny, Bruce,” she says arms stretched wide across the table trying to keep from getting angry. “Paige, Thompson, why don’t we continue this next week. My break isn’t much longer and I’m sure that Mr. Wayne has, I don’t know, something that he needs to do.”

 That stung a little.

 The lawyers look at each other, Thompson stands and gathers her items.  Paige looks at Bruce and Bruce nods at him in dismissal. He stands as well clearing up his files. Paige holds out a hand for Bruce to shake, and he does. The older man exits the room. Thompson stops when she’s next to his wife, the lawyer squeezes her shoulder in reassurance and the woman gives her a warm smile. When the door closes behind the lawyers, the smile falls from his wife’s lips.

 She lets out a sigh and gives him a glare, “You’re being ridiculous, Bruce. This isn’t a game.”

 “I didn’t think it was,” he says with a raised eyebrow.

 “I’ll take this to trial if I have to,” she tries.

 “No, you won’t.”

 “And, why wouldn’t I?” She says with a furrowed brow, eyes like steel. She’d definitely learned that in board meetings. There were times she couldn’t even fake being mad at the children, even when they royally screwed up.

 “We aren’t getting divorced,” he says with a shrug. He watches as a stunned expression crosses her face quickly, but she covers it. He stands and straightens his suit jacket.

 “For what reason would I stay with you?” She asked.

 “You love me, like I lov-”

 “You don’t love me, Bruce.” She says holding a hand up to pause him in his sentence. She shakes her head as if she was trying to get horrible thoughts from her head. “You don’t, you wouldn’t have done this otherwise. You wouldn’t.”

 He watches as tears filled her eyes and instinctively he moves around the table to be by her side. He pulls his handkerchief from his pocket, and she takes it. She dabs at the corners of her eyes before her make-up can run.

 “I can’t do this, Bruce,” she says as she stands. “Just sign the papers, do this for me. You said you’d give me anything, give me this.”

 “I can’t,” he says honestly.

She looks at him, stares into his eyes for what seems like hours but can’t be more than thirty seconds, and then looks away. Bruce backs away from the table as she pushes her chair back to stand.

 He can’t help but let his eyes run down her figure when she does. She was always stunning, even when she wasn’t trying, and it slightly bothered him that her work attire made it seem like she was attending one of his parties. The black vertical panels on the side of her dress cinched at her waist beautifully while the beige front and back complimented her skin tone and gave her a more professional look.

 She grabbed her brief case and swung her coat over her arm. She checked her watch and let out a sigh.

 “Because of you, I’m late for a meeting with the board about the funding for R&D” she says with pursed lips. “Any requests?”

 “Unlimited funding, is that possible?”

 She almost lets a smile past her lips, almost. “I’ll see what I can do.”

 He watches as she pulls open the heavy door that leads out of the conference room. She pauses.

 “Bruce, please,” she looks back at him with pleading eyes. “Do this for me. So, I can move on and you can be with her.”

 “I don’t want her, I want you.”

 “You already had me, you chose her.”

 He doesn’t get a chance to respond as she whisks away through the door. He can hear her heels click down the hall the further away from him she goes.

 He squeezes his fists in exasperation then removes his phone from his breast pocket. He dials a familiar number and waits.

 “Alfred, can you do something for me?”

 ***

You’d grown used to the taste of wine and it no longer burned when it hit the back of your throat. Still, you tried not to drink in front of the children, it’d only lead them to fawning over you and treating you like a baby chick needing to be protected.

 Setting the glass down over your nightstand, you watched from your bedroom window as the sun finally set and the last of the pinks and reds of dusk had finally faded away. As the darkness rushes in you hit the button on a remote and blackout curtains slowly descend over the large glass paned window.

Your eyes flicker over to the clock on the nightstand and watch as the red lines blink ‘7:45 P.M.’ at you. Another heavy sigh pulls its way out of your lips as you flop down on the gray comforter of your plush bed. It wasn’t really your color, but it still smelled like him and it helped you sleep.

 You were alone tonight, save for your maid Olivia, highly recommended by Alfred, paid for by an anonymous employer. It was the middle of the week, and none of your family would be by to visit you until the weekend.  Most nights like this you busied yourself with menial paperwork that you didn’t have to do, but that you needed to do in order to keep your mind busy. Other nights when you were feeling good, you worked on your designs for fashion line.  Tonight, however, you were mentally exhausted. Every time you saw him and a smile found its way to his lips, your heart fluttered like you were still a teenager talking to your first crush. You could almost feel your throat tighten up in anxiety. To make matters worse, when you know that you can’t avoid him you still chose things to wear that you knew he’d like. On days like that you scold yourself, you know how stupid it is. He chose her and you chose this.

 There were nights when you wondered if there was something about you that you could have changed that would have kept him entertained, kept his wandering eye in check, but every time you think it, the stronger part of you pushes the thought away. You and Selina were nothing alike. You didn’t look alike, speak in the same way, or have the same interests. You had never been the exciting or dangerous girl that had an air of mystery about her, that isn’t why Bruce married you, so that couldn’t have simply been the reason he cheated. If your crime had been any in this mess it would have been that you were naïve. Naïve enough to think that the emotional bond between Selina and Bruce would never amount to anything, even though it was the same type of bond that opened him up to you and brought you together.

 You supposed that was the worst part. Aside from the lying, what Selina and Bruce had, wasn’t just physical, he cared for her and you were sure she cared for him. Something deep like that wasn’t something that he could just cut off. He couldn’t just stop caring for her the same way you couldn’t stop loving him. There would always be a part of him that would yearn for her and you wanted that part to be completely and utterly yours. If you couldn’t have it, there was no point in holding out hope for him.

 “Ma’am,” a voice calls from your bedroom door.

 “It’s fine, Olivia come in.”

 The door to your bedroom pushes open and the dim lights in the room are made brighter by her movement. You stand and motion to the back of your dress.

 “Can you help me?”

 “Of course.”

 You hear the small feet housed in her kitten heels clack gently as she makes her way over to you. Within in seconds her small but strong hands have your zipper pulled down and the dress is pooling at your waist. You plop down again and you use your feet to wildly pull off your feels. They fling to different parts of the room and Olivia sighs in irritation.

 “Sorry,” you say looking at her sheepishly.

 “It’s quite alright, Ma’am” she says with a polite smile, but she’s scolding you with her stern green eyes. “I have something for you.”

 “Oh?”

 She pulls an envelope out of the large pocket of her dress and she presses the envelope into your waiting hand.

 “It’s beautiful,” you say in slight awe as you run your fingers over the gold cursive lettering of your name.

 “It was slipped under the door,” she comments.

 “I bet it was,” you say with pursed lips, “I told him not to come.”

 “I see.”

 You look at the older woman and she raises a pale blonde eyebrow at you and you say, “I’m nervous.”

 “Understandable, just remember that you are the one with the leverage. Where you go from here is all dependent on what you decide.”

 “I’ve never had to lead before, Bruce always did,” you admit. “Even at the company I’m just filling in a blueprint that was laid out for me.”

 “And yet no one is better at it then you are. Without you, where would Wayne Enterprises be?”

 “In the gutter, or at least out of our- the family.”

 “It seems to me that you’ve been leading perfectly well until now.”

 “Thanks,” you say with a small smile.

 “You are more than welcome.”

 You flip the envelope over and slide your finger over the of cream colored paper. When the seal is broken, you pull the contents from the envelope.

 “It an invitation,” you state reading the letter. “To a party.”

 “For what occasion?”

 “For me,” you say biting you lip as you feel you heart swell.

 “When?”

 “This Friday,” you say looking up at the older woman with childlike curiosity. “Should I go?”

 “Do you want to go?”

 “Yes and no.”

 “Why the no?”

 “I can’t think when I see him and every time I think about what he did I get angry or I cry or both. It’s awful.”

 “And the yes.”

 “Bruce throws the best parties,” you admit with a sigh. “And it’s for me. And even though I hate it, for the moment when I first see him I forget what he did and I can feel my heart pounding in my ears. A night like this, where I’m not trying to leave him, it maybe the last time I see him before we don’t mean anything to each other and we are just co-workers.”

 “You should go,” Olivia says after a pause. “If it’s to say goodbye let it be that, if it’s not let it be the first night you let the both of you begin to heal.”

 “I…Alright.”

 “Excellent,” she says and she’s quickly out of your room.

 “Olivia?” You question at her suddenness.

 “Here we are,” she says as she brings a large box and places it on your bed.

 You examine the large black box, there is no title, nothing significant about the box and your heart pounds in your chest. He has done things like this before, and it’s always something that makes you swoon.

 You tentatively lift the lid of the box and you were right to worry that you would swoon. From what you could see of the dress it was cream colored and covered in jewels and had a sweetheart neckline. You frown and close the box.

 “Ma’am?” She questions at your rejection.

 “I can’t wear this,” you say a sad smile pulling at your lips. “It’s too much lik-, I just can’t.”

 “Well then we need to go shopping.”

***  

He’s nervous and for the first time since he was a pre-pubescent teen he could feel his palms sweat. The worse thing about her not talking to him and not being able to go to the penthouse was that he wasn’t sure if she would actually come. That would leave him alone in this giant concert hall looking like a fool in front of the caterers and musicians that he hired.

 “Sir?” A familiar voice called and Bruce turns around to see the raised eyebrow of the man who raised him.

 “She’s not going to come Alfred,” Bruce says dejectedly. “I can feel it, this is a mistake.”

 “Sir I-”

 “I should have just gone to see her, begged for her to listen.”

 “I don’t think it’s necessary sir,” Alfred interrupts.

 “She’s here?” Bruce questions with furrowed brows.

 “Her car has just pulled up to the front of the venue.”

 “It’s time for the lights then,” Bruce says straightening his shoulders to regain his composure.

 “Very well, sir.”

 The moment that Alfred disappears behind a pair of curtains the lights in the hall dims and Bruce can see almost nothing save for a lone spotlight pointed at the entrance. In that darkness, he’s forced to wait for a pair of agonizingly long pair of minutes until he can see the point of her shoe come through the threshold.

 He has to keep himself from gaping when he sees her. He quickly notes that she’s not wearing the dress he picked out and it makes him question whether or not she enjoyed his taste anymore. She always wore the gowns that he picked out. However, the thoughts are quickly removed from his mind when he gets the full scope of her. The dress is a sinful red with a pair of matching shoes. It’s a sleek straight cut dress with a slit that goes up to a little above her mid-thigh. Her hair seems glossy even with the harsh light that is shining on her trying to drain it of its color. The dark jewels and make-up give her a more adult vibe then what he is used to seeing from her and he realizes that she’s different. Different then the slightly childish young woman that he married, and that despite all the things that she had done up until that point he’d never seen her as such.

 “Bruce?” she questions raising a hand to block the light. “What’s going on?”

 “You’re the guest of honor,” he says with a smile as he begins to approach her.

 She walks forward and when the two of them meet the lights are back to normal and she’s able to take in the full beauty of the concert hall.

 Cleared of seats, the floor was covered in a large amount of vibrant gold confetti. The walls painted with flowers, cherubs, and other heavenly hosts were decorated with white curtains and gold accents. The familiar tones of songs from years past floated through her ears and suddenly she can fill herself being transported to a time before all of the drama had begun.

 “This is-,” she pauses looking at the building. “You’ve recreated the whole thing.”

 “Yes,” he says with a smile as he watches her spin to look at the decorations and paintings.

 “No masks? I distinctly remember our New Year’s Eve/Engagement party being a masquerade” She questions looking at him with an arched eyebrow.

 “No more masks,” he says with a shake of his head. “Not between us.”

 “That’s new,” she snarks.

 “More like overdue.”

 Her eyes flash to his face, searching for his sincerity, then seemingly satisfied or uninterested she turns her head back to the venue.

 “It’s not much of a party if it’s only the two of us,” she says.

 “Two of us is more than enough,” he knows where the comment will lead, and he wants it to go there. He’d plan to wine and dine her, but seeing her here like this, he didn’t know if he could wait.

 “Is it?” she questions with a cock of her head. “I seem to recall it not being enough.”

 “It always was, you were, are enough. I’m the one who had the problem.”

 “That you hid and lied to me about.”

 She’s facing him now, arms crossed over her chest and good mood soured. There was very few words left that would keep her here.

 “Dance with me,” he says as the song changes. It’s a slow comfortable melody, that doesn’t require a lot of thought to move too. His hand his offered out to her and she swallows as she looks at it. Should she even bother giving him a chance? If she fell into his arms would she be able to pry herself out again? She doubted it, Bruce seemed to be in rare form tonight, something she should have expected when she got that letter.

 Against her better judgement, she slips her softer hand into his rough one. She feels the familiar thump of her heart increase in speed when it closes over hers and he pulls her closer to him. In an instant, she’s flush against his chest and his arm is wrapped around her waist guiding her through the dance.

 They sway in silence for a moment, both relishing the feel of each other again after a long ten months apart.

 “Even the song is the same,” she murmurs. “I can’t believe you remembered it.”

 “Of course, I did,” he says looking down into the glistening orbs that blinked back at him. “It was one of the happiest moments of my life.”

 She smiles with closed lips, and there isn’t an ounce of warmth that reaches her eyes. He knows why, and he knows that it’s the beginning of their issues.

 “I pressured you that night,” he says and she raises her eyebrows in surprise. “I thought to myself ‘who wouldn’t want to get engaged to Bruce Wayne at his New Year’s Eve party. It’ll be the talk of the town.’ I didn’t care to see how uncomfortable you were.”

 “You tried to pressure me tonight too.”

 “The dress was too much?”

 “A little,” she says honestly. “I don’t know where you got it though, I gave the other one away.”

 “I had a seamstress recreate it from the photo, I wanted to recreate that night, and do it the way it should have been done.”

 “We can’t redo that night. I’m not the little girl who is just excited to be in a princess dress and running behind Bruce Wayne. I can’t go back to that, I won’t.”

 “I don’t want you to be,” he says as he moves a hand to her cheek and rubs it over her cheekbone. He almost lets out a sigh of relief when she leans into his touch.

 “Then what do you want?”

 “You.”

 “You had me.”

 “I know,” he says and he pulls her slightly closer so she’s pressed tightly against him, similarly to the way she’s pressed against him when they are in bed. He can feel her chest heave against his as she takes a deep breath, and he’s relieved that he still can make her nervous. That she hasn’t lost complete affection for him. “I was selfish.”

 “Is that what you would call it?”

 “That’s the only thing that I can think of. Everything about you is perfect and yet for some reason I couldn’t see it, or didn’t want to see it.”

 “And that led you to cheat on me?” She questions.

 “Maybe,” he says honestly. “I can’t tell you the reason why I did what I did. I know that Selina and I could have had something once, and even while I was doing it I knew it was wrong.”

 “But?”

 “But I couldn’t stop myself. I didn’t want to stop, and the only reason that I can even offer to rationalize my actions is because I knew that you would be there no matter what I did. That you would still love me no matter how much I hurt you. That I could have both. Selina and I had a bond that I should have ended the moment that I decided to be serious about my relationship with you, but instead I hid it, and it culminated into everything that happened. For that I’m sorry. I’m sorry I lied to you, and hurt you. I’m sorry I cheated on you and made you feel worthless.”

 She has an unreadable expression on her face as she stares at him unblinkingly, but he knows she’s thinking. For a moment, he can feel his heart speed up with nerves as her silence extends, but he feels alleviated when she leans her head on his chest, ear resting above his heart.

 “That night I was so scared, you know. In my mind, I knew you were going to propose, and I knew you were going to do it in front of all of those people. Stupidly, though, I held out the hope that you would do it when we were alone, that you’d whisk me away to some quiet corner ask then come back to make the announcement to the crowd. I would have been okay with it then. But you made it about you, and what would have looked best for you. I should have said no that night, knocked you off your high horse a little. Embarrassed the great Bruce Wayne, but I couldn’t. It was what you wanted so I gave it to you. I can’t do that anymore.”

 “I wouldn’t want you to, and you shouldn’t have to, especially after everything I’ve put you through.”

 She lets out a sigh of contentment, “I believe you.”

 It’s silent for a moment as they sway back and forth to the music.

 “If you do cheat again, there won’t be a Batman,” she says looking up at him with stern eyes. “I will literally bash your fucking head in with one of those stupid busts if you even look at that fucking woman, because that’s the only way I can think of for you to feel as much pain as I’ve been in since I found out.”

 There is no mirth behind her eyes, not lightness to say that she is joking. He knows that the threats aren’t real and that  in actuality her words are a statement of how insecure in their relationship she feels. “I won’t, I don’t think that I’d be able to bear watching you leave again. Or that Jason would let me live.”

 It’s quiet for a moment as she lays her head on his chest again.

 “I couldn’t hurt you even if I wanted to,” she whispers. “I couldn’t even sleep with that guy a couple months ago, even though I should have.”

 He’s quiet for a moment and when he feels his shirt start to feel damp he pulls her closer.

 “How could you, Bruce?” She questions, her voice small.

 “I’m sorry.”

 “Did you cry?”

 “What?”

 “When I left, did you cry? When you saw me with him did you cry?”

 “Yes,” he says with no hesitation.

 “Good, if I was the only one that had swollen eyes that would be embarrassing.”

 “The first time I couldn’t open my right eye because it was so big.”

 “Frankly, I’m surprised you still have working tear ducts. Even after being with you for so long, I’m still not convinced that you aren’t part robot,” she says as she looks up at him with damp eyes, a sly smile spreads across her face.

 “If I was, I wouldn’t need the suit.”

 They chuckle and Bruce pulls away from her. He brings his thumbs to her cheeks and wipes away the stray tears. “I have something I want to ask you.”

 “What?”

 She could see his Adams apple move up and down in nervousness and she raises an eyebrow at his uneasy behavior.  When she sees him back away from her and kneel she has to put a hand over her mouth to hide her shock.

 Feeling deep in his pocket he pulls out a small black velvet ring box. He opens the box and reveals are large princess cut diamond ring sitting in a center.

 “Bruce-”

 “I know we still have our own issues to workout, that this is a little soon. But I wanted to start again, from the time that should have been one of our happiest moments, but started us on the path where we’ve ended up today. These last months without you have been some of the worst in my life. No one speaks to me unless they have to, and its left me with time to myself to realize that I was the problem. That you had been there for me, giving everything that you had, but I didn’t think that I needed to give you the same.  I didn’t realize that loving someone wasn’t just about providing, and I segmented you off as just another part of the person that is Bruce Wayne. You weren’t Batman’s wife, you were Bruce Wayne’s and that you weren’t getting all of me the way I was getting all of you. So, I’m asking you to marry me again, so that I can give you the same amount of love and affection that I should have from the start.”

 She doesn’t rush to give her answer like she did the first time.  This time, despite her love for him, she’s worried about the heartbreak that she’d have to endure again if he couldn’t keep his word. It also wasn’t just her that she had to think about either. What about the children? If this fell through a second time, did she want to have them choose between her and their father again? Not only that, despite how plagued with thoughts she was with him during her down time, she also loved some of the independence she gained by being alone. She loved the new understanding of herself she gained by being alone and doing a job that she loved.

 “I want to quit the company,” is the phrase that tumbles past her lips. He blinks up at her rapidly, confused, and interpreting her answer as rejection.

 “What?” He asks moving to close the box.

 “I mean, yes, I’ll marry you, again,” she says with a roll of her eyes. She holds her empty left hand out. She hadn’t worn her wedding ring in so long that the imprint of her previous ring had long since vanished. She could feel herself smile as she admired the ring when it was slipped on her finger.

 Bruce moved to stand.

 “Don’t get up yet, you still have some promises to make while your down there,” she says locking eyes with him. “Perhaps quit my job is too harsh of a word. I want you to start doing your job, at least part time.”

 “Okay?”

 “That means that there are going to be days where you have to come home and rest, and trust the boys to do the job you trained them to do. There are going to be consecutive days where I want you to be just Bruce Wayne, just my husband, day and night.”

 “I understand.”

 “I’m not done yet. At the same time, when you’re gone I’m not going to be sitting home waiting for you to grace me with your presence. I won’t do that anymore.  I want to start designing again too, and that means that there will be times that I can’t be Bruce Wayne’s date, he’ll have to be mine. I bought a building downtown that I want to renovate and turn into my studio. That means I can’t be there to run your business and mine.”

 “It won’t be an issue.”

 “This last part you might resent me for. But we have to go to therapy for this shit.” She motions to the space between the two of them. “Nothing about our lives is normal, adding this emotional baggage on top of it is bound to make it harder, not better. Because even if I want to trust and believe you, there won’t be a moment when your gone that I won’t think that you’re not with her. Even when I know better. That distrust will breed resentment, and we’ll be back where we were ten months ago and I don’t know who it will be the one begging for forgiveness then.”

 He pauses at the idea that a stranger may have to be involved in his personal life, something he wasn’t fond of, but she was right, the same way she always was. He nodded his agreement.

 “If I think of something else I’ll let you know, but for now,” she moves her hands to rest on his face and she slides the pads of her thumbs across his cheekbones. “Please know, that I’ll happily marry you again.”

 She presses a chaste kiss to his lips and quickly pulls away before he can respond, but it is honestly more than he was expecting. He stands to his full height and his arms are wrapped tightly around her waist as he buries his face in her hair. He’s holding her so tightly that she almost has to gasp in order to get air. She wants to struggle at first, push him away so she can breathe, but she finds herself pulling him closer with one hand and rubbing his back in a soothing motion with the other.

 It’s the tears she feels roll down her shoulder that do it. For the first time in a long time they aren’t her own.  The slightly choking gasp for air isn’t her own. And the pathetic nature of his cry is startling because it’s the first time she’s experienced it and she realizes that he’d been telling the truth earlier when he’d told her he cried.

 She feels guilty for the slight curve of her lips that is hidden in the depth of his shoulder and she’ll scold herself for it later, but right now she’s happy to know that she hadn’t been suffering alone all this time and that maybe there is a way for them to be a proper family again.

[estebanana-fana-blog]

La tempête parfaite

Post Season 2.  The MC, Paige Turner, is forced to do an interview of Vincent for City of Love: Paris.  She flies to his vacation home in Vermont and some bad weather hits.

Rating: T for mild kissing and references to sex.

Special thanks to @boughtmywayintopopculture being a co-writer for this piece and helping me along in both the editing and writing processes!

Paige held her eyes closed for a moment, desperately hoping she was hallucinating.  However, when she opened her eyes the slip of paper left on her desk with her latest assignment still read the same: Vincent Karm, CEO Karm International, EPD: ASAP.  Not only did they want her to do an interview with Vincent but, they had the expected publish date set to as soon as possible?!

This is ridiculous! Paige thought to herself as she balled up the paper in her hands and flung it into the waste bin.  As if working for my ex isn’t awkward enou- Paige’s eyes narrowed Raphael! He had to have something to do with this!

Shouldering her bag, Paige left her cubicle and stormed into her boss’s office.

“Where is Raphael?”  Paige demanded closing the door behind her and taking a seat.

“Well, hello to you too Ms. Turner.  Please, do sit down.  I’m fine, thanks for asking.” Her boss replied sarcastically as he tried to adjust his combover so the bald spot was concealed; he wasn’t fooling anyone.

Paige just glared at the man expectantly, waiting for him to answer her question.

With a dramatic eye roll her boss explained, “Raphael is not in the office.  He is in Italy where he will be working with the City of Love: Rome office for the next two weeks.  And yes, before you ask, he had everything to do with your latest assignment,” he held up his palm to stop her from interjecting as he continued. “Don’t blame Raphael though, it was the only way.”

“The only way what?!” Paige asked not only angry but curious now as well.

“The only way Karm would agree to an interview.  He asked for you specifically when Raphael reached out to him.  He said it was either you or no interview; he only expects the best quality writer, not some subpar newbie.  His words not mine, not that everyone here doesn’t know you are our best writer.”  He replied relaxing down in his chair and folding his hands together over his abdomen.  “Listen, Paige, Raphael wants this article.  He is the boss and what he says goes.  I got your flight all set -”

“My flight?! Why do I need a flight to do an interview in Paris?!” She interrupted, jumping out of her seat.

“Well, here is the thing.  Vincent is currently vacationing in Vermont.  He was gracious enough to start the interview this week and supply you lodging at his cabin.  Which works out great because we don’t have to worry about covering hotel expenses now.” He said as he straightened in his seat.

“Vermont?!  I have to fly all the way to America to do this interview and you think I am just going to share a room with Vincent Karm for however long this takes?!”  She spat gesturing wildly with her hands which often happened when she was upset.

“You won’t be sharing a room with him.  He rents out his cabin as a bed and breakfast when he isn’t there.  When he is, he likes his privacy and has the place to himself.  You will have your own room.  If you share a room with Vincent Karm, that is none of my business and all on you.”  He said as he started typing on his computer, clearly losing interest in this conversation.

“I cannot believe this… I’m taking the day off and going home.” Paige stated as she grabbed her bag off of the floor, turning towards the door.

“Paige, like I said before you are our best writer.  However, if you don’t plan on making this interview happen, don’t bother showing up tomorrow.”

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as her hand hovered inches above the door handle.  Through gritted teeth she asked, “When is the flight?”

“Thursday, 8:45 am.” He answered, a certain smugness in is voice.

With that Paige opened the door and stormed out of his office going only to her desk to collect her coat, scarf, and gloves before heading towards the exit.  Before she reached the exit, she turned on her heels and walked back to her desk, reached into her waste bin and pulled out the crumpled ball she had thrown in there earlier, shoving it into her bag before heading back to her apartment.

Rain pelted the window of the plane as Paige scrolled aimlessly through her social media feed before she had to put her phone on airplane mode.  She was desperately trying to distract herself from the thought of having to spend a minimum of three days with Vincent Karm.  She didn’t hate the man, she didn’t even dislike him; he just made her feel uncomfortable.  She hated feeling awkward in her own skin.  Vincent had that effect on her, along with some other effects she’d prefer not to think about.  They definitely had a history together and Paige didn’t know what to make of it.  They worked together once.  She didn’t like to think about the events of Kat, her best friend’s, death.  But, truth be told, without Vincent’s help her killer may have never been caught.  

I shouldn’t have kissed him.  Why did I initiate that kiss… I was just caught up in the moment.  I mean, yeah, it was good.  Okay, it was a lot better than good but, still it was a mistake.  I just made everything awkward for myself.  In my defense I didn’t invite him up!  Even though I wanted to…

Paige’s internal fight was interrupted when the stewardess came to offer her a pillow and a blanket for her flight.  Her bosses may have been too cheap to get her a hotel room but at least they splurged and booked her a first class ticket.  

Paige gratefully accepted both luxuries she was offered and made herself comfortable.  She felt her eyes grow heavy, as she hardly slept due to anxiety and last minute packing.  The last thing she remembered thinking to herself before she was lulled into a dreamless sleep was, This change in timezone is going to be the death of me.

When she awoke her mouth was so dry it felt like her tongue was sandpaper.

I wonder if this is how Whiskey feels all the time, she thought idly as her mind wandered to her cat who she left in Leo’s care.

She stretched her arms above her head and rolled her head side to side hoping to alleviate the twinge she felt in her neck.

She still had 4 hours left in her flight but she was surprised by how long she was actually asleep for. She stood up to open the overhead compartment where her carry-on was stored.  She pulled out her laptop and pressed the call button before sitting back down.  Before her computer had even booted up completely, an attendant showed up. She politely asked for a bottle of water.  She drank half the bottle then she opened up the document she was working on.

By the time the plane had landed she had a basic outline for what she wanted to get out of the interview and had played roughly seven games of solitaire.  She lost every time.

She gazed up at the enormous cabin in front of her.  It looked as if it was right out of a travel magazine that featured log cabins in the woods, only double the size.  

No wonder this place can be used as a B&B when he’s not here.  It’s huge! She thought as she hitched her duffle back higher up on her shoulder.

As she walked up the driveway, a fresh layer of snow crunched beneath her boots and she heard barking coming from inside.  She felt her stomach sink as she heard the cab pull away, fighting back the urge to chase after it despite the driver’s lack of social skills and noxious B.O.  She had tried so hard to just avoid Vincent for the past couple of months but, all of that ended here as she reached the front door.  She grabbed the bronze knocker and tapped it two times on the door.  The barking, which had subsided, picked up again.  A smile played on her lips as she remembered how much Vincent adored his four-legged companion.  So much so, he had portraits of him in multiple locations.  She mentally chastised herself when she realized what she was doing.  She had been avoiding Karm for a reason.  She was here for one purpose and one purpose only: get the interview done and leave.

The door opened and she was pleasantly surprised when she saw who opened the door.  The red-haired man smiled enthusiastically at her as he gestured for her to come inside from the cold.

“Eugene!  I’m so glad to see you!” Paige expressed genuinely as she embraced Vincent’s employee.

“I was so happy to learn that you were coming!” Eugene replied clapping his hands together. “Vincent is just freshening up before dinner.  Let me show you to your room, Ms. Turner.”

“Thank you, Eugene.  I would appreciate that, it’s been a long day.” She stated as she shed off her winter coat and scarf and placed them in Eugene’s outstretched hands.

As Eugene hung up her belongings,Paige heard Esteban before she saw him slowly making his way towards her.  He gave little snorts as he tried to get to know her scent.  

“Esteban, assis.” Eugene said in a firm voice to the pug, who immediately sat down.  “ You can pet him if you’d like.  I don’t believe you’ve met Esteban before.  He is Vincent’s pride and joy.  He is also quite well behaved, when he feels like it.” The man stated with a soft laugh.

“So, you’re Esteban.” Paige said as she crouched down to the pug’s level and began to scratch behind his ears. “I’ve heard good things about you.” she told the dog as he opened his mouth allowing his tongue to hang out as he panted, clearly enjoying the attention.

After a moment of acquainting herself with the pug, she followed Eugene to her room.  The room was spacious yet cozy.  A queen sized bed with a antique looking quilt was at the center of the room.  In the corner, an arm chair was placed next to a bookshelf.

“There is no wifi here but you can plug your laptop directly into the internet via the telephone jack by the desk.  If you need assistance, I would be happy to help.”  Eugene explained.  

While inconvenient, Paige was not completely unfamiliar with the technological throwback.  She glanced at the clock;  Eugene told her to take her time making herself feel at home and he would come get her in a half hour for dinner.  Taking advantage of the time she had; Paige began to unpack.  She grabbed her laptop and placed it on the desk, letting out a relieved sigh that she remembered to pack her chargers with the correct adapters for American outlets. She just finished connecting her computer to the internet when she heard a knock at the door.

She didn’t realize that it had been a half hour already but, she figured Eugene must have finished dinner early.

“Come in Eugene!” Paige called still on her hands and knees under the desk, making sure the cable connecting her computer to the wall was secure.

She heard the door open and the sound of dress shoes on the wood floor, muffled once they reached the ornate area rug.

“Actually, I figured I would let Eugene finish up in the kitchen and that I would fetch you myself instead.”

Vincent’s voice deep and smooth was a shock when she had not been expecting it.  Paige, in her surprise, tried to stand up quickly but ended up hitting her head on the underside of the desk.

“Ouch!” Paige yelped as she held the back of her head as she got to her feet and turned to face Vincent.

“Are you okay? Would you like me to get you some ice?” Vincent asked, his eyes wide with concern.

His sincerity shocked Paige.  She figured he would laugh at her expense for being so clumsy, especially after she had denied his advances after their kiss.

“No, I’m fine.” Paige stated tersely.  “Thank you though...” she added after a minute, recognizing that she had no reason to be rude to the man.  It wasn’t his fault that she felt so awkward, after all.  

Although, it is your fault for being so damn attractive.  Must you look so good in a three piece suit?!  

“If you’re sure, Ms. Turner.” Vincent stated his eyes still searching to make sure she was in fact okay.  “Well, I wanted to welcome you and tell you to make yourself at home.  I apologize for being unavailable when you first arrived.”

“I got to meet Esteban in your absence, he’s quite adorable.”  Paige stated.

A small hint of a smile played on Vincent’s lips so briefly that Paige wasn’t entirely sure it wasn’t her mind playing tricks on her, or a side effect of bashing her head so hard.

“Thank you for saying so, Ms. Turner.  I am very fond of my canine companion.”  Vincent responded.  A smirk formed and Paige knew the smile she had caught was real.  “Dinner is ready if you are.  You must be famished after your flight.”

“I am, thank you.” She sighed at her shortness with him.  This trip was going to be very painful if she didn’t learn to get over her awkwardness with Vincent.

Thankfully dinner went by without a hitch and, despite the pounding in her head after her incident with the desk, she actually… enjoyed herself.

Vincent was unwilling to talk business at the dinner table and after dinner her jetlag was catching up with her.  The two mutually decided that they would begin getting to work the next day.

Paige had changed in to her pajamas and was about to get into her bed when she heard the soft rap of knuckles against her door.

“Yes?” She called out while she took a makeup wipe to her face.

“Is it okay if I open the door?” Vincent’s voice resonated through the door.

“Umm, just a second...” Paige answered hastily tossing the used makeup wipe in the trash and hopping into bed and pulling up the covers.  She wasn’t prepared to have Vincent Karm see her in the flannel short shorts she was wearing to bed.   “Okay, all set.” she announced as she ran her hands over her hair, rolling her eyes at herself. When did she begin to care so much about how she looked in Vincent’s presence?

The door opened barely more than a crack and Vincent stuck his head in the opening.  “I just wanted to see if you needed anything before bed.” Vincent spoke softly.

Paige was about to answer when a tan blur came hurtling onto the bed to her.  Esteban circled twice then plopped down with a grunt.  

Vincent gaped for a second at the scene that just unraveled.

“Esteban!” he chastised the dog.  “I am so very sorry!  He is never like this with anyone…” Realizing the dog was paying him no attention, he questioned whether he should enter the room and physically remove the dog.

Paige let out a soft giggle.  After the long day she had the pug’s presence was welcome.

“It’s okay, Mr. K-” Paige began but was cut off.

“Please, call me Vincent.” He stated firmly, a trace of something Paige couldn’t identify in his voice; almost sadness.

“Okay, Vincent, but you have to call me Paige then.” She replied hoping that the room was dark enough that he couldn’t see the blush rising to her cheeks.   “And If it’s okay with you, I’d actually prefer that he stay.” she continued.

She laid a hand on the sleeping pug’s back.  Having Esteban there sharing a bed with her was nice.  It helped her feel more at home, as she was used to sharing her bed with Whiskey.  

“If you insist.  Did you need anything else?” Vincent asked, still perplexed over the odd behavior of his four legged companion.

“No, I have everything that I need,” She answered while trying to stifle a yawn.  “Goodnight, Vincent” she stated signaling he was free to go and that she was ready for bed.

He gave her a quick nod and pulled the door closed until the the latch clicked.

Vincent stared at the doorknob, mentally berating himself for being so hesitant and reserved.  His confident facade had faded and he half-wondered if this was how Raphael felt all the time.  It was uncomfortable to say the least.

He requested her in hopes of finding out whether or not the tightness he experienced in his chest was still there when he saw her.  A mere thought of her made his heart jump as he recalled how challenging she had been, protective of those she loved and cared for.  

Several months and an ocean apart had done nothing for the overwhelming intensity of what he felt for the woman on the other side of the door.

Who is here to do a job.  He reminded himself.  

It broke his heart to hear her call him what everyone else did, by his surname.  She used to call him Vincent and he never once asked her to do so.  That he had to ask her, after everything they had gone through, hurt and twisted in his gut like a knife.

He had seen the faint color in her cheeks when she asked for him to call her by her first name, in turn.  He should have just suffered through the annoyance of being called Mr. Karm if it meant she was comfortable.  

He found himself envious of his own dog, both because he wished he could be so open with affection and because Esteban was the one sleeping next to her.  Keeping her warm and safe.

He suddenly found himself longing to be the one next to her.  Vincent wondered what it would be like to wake up with his arms around her, her head on his chest as she slept.  To see her face at peace, something she deserved after the past few years.

She couldn’t know what he felt for her; he couldn’t allow her to find out.  Not yet, at least.  She was here to do what Raphael asked her to do. He couldn’t scare her off by letting her know that months, even years if he counted his time in prison, had done nothing to soothe the ache in his chest that came with every thought of her.

“Goodnight, Paige.” Vincent said softly to the door before heading to his own room to get ready for bed himself.

When Paige awoke she felt surprisingly refreshed.  While she was normally an early riser, waking up well before sunrise, the time on her phone revealed that it was almost noon.   She looked down at the bed to find that Esteban was no longer with her.  Eugene or Vincent must have retrieved him earlier in the morning to let him out and give him his breakfast.

She freshened herself up and dressed before she left her room to go find Vincent.  She wanted to get on with her job.  The faster she finished her article, the faster she could leave.  Then, maybe, she could fall asleep thinking of something other than Vincent Karm in bed only a few doors down from her.

Paige found Vincent in the living room, his eyes glued to his laptop, wired much the same way as hers for internet.  He was holding what smelled like coffee, steam wafting from the ceramic mug.

“Ah, you’re finally awake.”  He glanced at her before he took a sip from his mug, eyes scanning the screen again.

“That’s twice now, that I’ve left you waiting for me while I was unconscious.” Paige said, taking the offered cup and plate of food from Eugene, who silently slipped in and out of the room with ease.  She mouthed a thank you to the manservant as he left the room.

“Yes, well, hopefully this isn’t as...traumatic as the previous time.”  He said softly; if anyone from her time in Paris was aware of her suffering from her friend’s death, it was Vincent.

“I wouldn’t call that whole night traumatic.” She replied.

She kept her gaze firmly planted on her plate of food as she realized what she just said.  She stabbed a piece of egg with more force than she expected, the metal making a sound against the porcelain.

She was afraid.  Afraid to face whatever happened between them months ago, afraid of the feelings she harbored for the man who once tried to take over Paris.  The gut wrenching frustration with herself from earlier in the week came back but she was determined to push it aside.  She was here for one thing: his side of the events of the floods.

You were supposed to get here, do the interview, and leave.  No flirting. No awkwardness. But no, you had to go and screw that up, Paige.  Damn him.  Damn him for being...attractive and caring and a hell of a good kisser beneath that devilish persona.

Paige cleared her throat after a sip of coffee; it was probably one of the best homebrews she had, second only to Kat’s.  And the food was delicious, even for simple breakfast fare.

“What time did you want to start?  Is there a place you’re most comfortable?” She asked, eyes darting up just to see Vincent’s back to her, that he had shifted to face his computer again.

Thank goodness.  That meant she had a little time to hide the creeping flush across her cheeks.

“I was actually hoping we could take a walk.  Vermont this time of year is simply beautiful.”  He stated as he closed his laptop and turned to face her.  “If that is okay with you of course.” He added and something flickered in his eyes; hope.  

She was being hard on him, she realized; it was only fair for her to concede.  Plus, he was agreeing to do this interview.  Vincent, while used to being in the limelight, remained very private.  This interview was meant to be candid; he agreed to open up, to the readers yes, but primarily to Paige.  

“Sure, that would be fine.  I’ll go put on something warmer and grab my recorder.” She told him as she turned to head to the kitchen to place her dishes in the sink.

Once she was finished changing she met Vincent by the front door.  He was throwing an emerald scarf over his dress coat.  He was dressed impeccably as always despite the fact that they were going for a walk through the snow.  Paige noticed his choice in footwear; a pair of black leather Hermès boots.  If her time with TJ had taught her anything, it had taught her just how much he probably spent on those boots.  

“All set?” She asked as she began to realize for the first time this trip they would be completely alone together.

“Ready when you are.” Vincent answered simply.

The pair exited the cabin together the snow made soft crunching noises beneath their boots.  

It was pretty mild in temperature, at least for winter in North East America.  Paige had checked the weather forecast before her plane had taken off the day before and there was talk of a storm.  With the weather as temperate as it was, it didn’t seem possible for more than a light flurry.  Paige took her recorder out and pressed the red button.  She began asking some basic questions as she would with anyone to ease them into the more in-depth material she was looking for.

She continued to ask him questions; he pointed to various parts of the property while he answered.  Paige nearly had everything she needed for now.  She would work with what she got from the interview once she got back to her room.  After that, she would figure out where the gaps where and see what she needed to add.  At that moment, only one question was left for her to ask.

“What motivated you to even help save the city?” Paige began, looking over at Vincent when she asked the question. “ You clearly were trying to push boundaries the night I was arrested, considering you basically summoned me to your cell.  What possessed you to break out of prison to help?”

He inhaled, a little sharper than he probably meant to.  “One of those answers I can’t give.”

“On the record, then.” She specified.

“I couldn’t stand the idea of some base destroyer taking the city from me, from anyone.  Paris is the city of love, of light.  Of hope.  It was, and is, a refuge for artists, for musicians, for those who felt they didn’t belong elsewhere.”

He continued his train of thought and she waited until he finished before she turned off her recorder.

“And off the record?” She asked, her heart beating in her chest like a drum.  He clearly had something to hide and she would find out what.

His adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, hesitating in his words.  A first for Vincent Karm.

“I couldn’t stand seeing you in agony, after that night.  I told myself I would find a way to help so you would never have to feel that pain again.” He replied with nothing but sincerity.

This was not something she had either expected or prepared for.  A silence lingered between the pair as she was at a loss for how to respond to this earnest expression.  

“So, why Vermont?” She asked for the sole purpose of changing the subject and breaking the awkward silence.  

“Honestly?” He asked as she looked at him expectantly, urging him to tell her.  “I have a weakness for maple syrup.”

Shocked by the utter simplicity of his answer Paige began to laugh, trying to cover her mouth to stifle herself.

“What?” Vincent said with a grin, amused by her laughter.  It had been awhile since he had seen her so at ease and carefree.  “Nothing compares to freshly tapped maple syrup!”

“Oh, so Vincent Karm has a sweet tooth, huh?” She asked teasingly, finally managing to get her laughter under control.

“That shouldn’t surprise you, considering the company I’m currently keeping.” He replied smoothly with a small grin making eye contact with her.

Yet again, the slightly awkward tension returned.  She knew her cheeks were turning pink but, whether it was from the cold or his compliment she couldn’t be sure.

Is he flirting with me? She thought as she hoped her blush wasn’t obvious.

“You know what my favorite part of winter is?” She asked as she stopped in her tracks to stick her gloved hands in the snow.

“What?” Vincent asked in reply, eyebrows raising slightly.

“This.” She stated as she pelted him with a snowball.  

His eyes widened as he realized what had just happened, that maybe he should have seen coming.  

“Paige…” He began.

“Yes?” She replied with a laugh.

“This is war.” He stated calmly as he bent down, forming a snowball of his own.

The snowballed arched, hitting Paige square in the shoulder, causing her to squeal in surprise.  It became an all out brawl, snowballs thrown back and forth between the pair.  Vincent’s deep chuckle mixed with Paige’s girlish laughter and shrieks of delight.

Paige felt a snowball hit her on the back of her neck and icy fragments were sent down the collar of her jacket.  She yelped against the cold on her flesh.

“Oh, you’re going down, Karm!” she cried as she dashed toward him.

As she neared the man, she stepped on a patch of ice hidden under a layer of snow.  She felt herself slipping and reached out for Vincent to steady herself.  She grabbed hold of Vincent’s arm but only managed to pull him down with her.  When they fell, he took the brunt of the impact, only to have her land on him.  They both stilled for a moment, realizing just how close their faces were to each other.

Paige felt her mouth go dry as Vincent took her hand placing it over his chest.  She felt his heart beating rapidly through his jacket and coat.  Her eyes locked on his, realizing this gesture was very unvincentlike.  It was unlike him to put himself in such a vulnerable position when he was so used to being in control.

Unable to maintain eye contact, her eyes drifted down to his lips, not that that was much better.  She knew he wanted to kiss her but she couldn’t let that happen.

“I want to but… I… I can’t do this again.” her voice barely above audible.

“Kiss me or be hurt again?” he asked, his voiced pained.

What if there isn’t a difference between the two.  There wasn’t with Raphael.  Paige thought to herself.  She was both scared that they had been so close to kissing and disappointed that she couldn’t allow herself to let it happen.

“...I don’t know.  But, when I do, I’ll tell you.” She replied her voice still soft.

She shifted off him and stood, brushing excess snow off of her before offering Vincent her hand.  It was the least she could do, considering she was the reason he fell in the first place.

They made it back to the cabin cold and wet from all the snow that they threw at each other.  The heat of the indoors warmed their cold skin as they both remove their outerwear.  

Paige excused herself to her room with the excuse of wanting to get some of her ideas down while they were still fresh.  As soon as she got to her room, she turned on her computer and set herself down to write.  All she could think about was Vincent, and not the things she needed for her piece.  

Like his emerald eyes and his lips, small but soft.  Or how she had never truly seen him smile until now.  Or laugh without a darker meaning behind his words.  This was a different side of him, the man beneath the metaphors and sinister intent.  A man who owned a house in Vermont strictly because of his taste for maple syrup.

That’s why he wanted me to do this interview.  Who else but the person he helped to capture an image other than the one he’s known for?

Paige opened her work document and set about transcribing her audio files.  

Vincent watched Paige disappear into her room before noticing Esteban in an armchair, the pug watching him in turn.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Vincent muttered.  

Esteban gave a whine, his tail wagging lazily from side to side.

“She needs her space, you can cuddle with her later.”  Vincent walked over and scratched the dog behind his ear.  

His clothes still held the chill from outside but that chill had followed them inside and clung to the air.  Had he been too forward?  He knew she still hurt from Raphael, from going too fast too quickly only to find out his jealous streak ran far deeper than she originally thought.

It hurt, to hear her words.  That she would deny herself what she wanted.  What they both wanted.  But she needed to decide that for herself, in time.

He hadn’t forgotten how her light brown hair smelled, how beautiful the freckles across her nose were, or how endearing the flush across her cheeks could be.  But for her to be so close, in that moment, and not be able to…

Vincent let out a breath through his nose and cast his gaze back down the hall.  She would be busy for the rest of the day and it was probably best if he let her be.

A shower would do him good.  He needed a clearer head.  Maybe hot water would at least remove the chill he couldn’t seem to get rid of.

He left a trail of clothes behind him after he closed his bedroom door and made his way to the bathroom.  The tile was warm under his feet; heated floors were a necessity in such a climate.

He hissed when he entered the shower, finding the water to be too hot.  Or, maybe he was just too cold.

It wasn’t like him to be so...open with his intentions, at least with most people.  Then again, Paige wasn’t “most people” and she often demanded for him to be straight with her.  She did from the start.  She had earned that much from him, certainly.  

She earned my bloody heart without even trying.  Vincent thought darkly.

Vincent began washing his hair, his thoughts of earlier coming back.  She reached for him rather than flail helplessly and he hadn’t wanted her to fall; he was hoping they wouldn’t fall at all.

He expected to catch her, to hold her against him for the briefest of moments before letting her go.  He fell with her instead.  It wouldn’t do for her to hurt herself or, worse, have a concussion.  It was purely instinctive for him to hold her so he took most of the impact.  He doubted he would have done it a few years ago.  

He thought of Paige again, her laugh as she threw a snowball at him, her hazel eyes glancing down at his lips, her weight on him.  He wondered what it would be like to kiss her, to press his lips to her neck, to her warm skin, and show her that the pain she seemed to anticipate would never come.  Not if he could help it.  

He swallowed hard as he rinsed his hair.  He thought back to the night they first kissed.  She straddled him, grabbed him by his tie, and kissed him hard and long and sudden.  Very few had ever gained the upper hand with him so easily.  He was used to women throwing themselves at him but this...was something else entirely.  It was, for the first time in a long time, genuine in its passion.

Or so he hoped.

He remembered how close they were that night, how close they had been just under an hour ago.

Vincent finished the rest of his normal routine before he shut off the water and dried off.  He wrapped the towel around his waist as he went to peruse his closet for a clean set of clothes.  Once he was dressed, he returned to the living room to pick up where he left off on his emails.

Paige ate dinner quickly, barely making eye contact with anyone before dashing back into her room.  She felt awkward, watched, and she didn’t mean to be so closed off; the relationship of an interview went both ways.  But every time she even thought about approaching Vincent again, fear gripped her gut and she was left resorting to small talk and no eye contact.

The following morning, she curled up on the couch in the living room.  Esteban was on her bed down the hall last she knew, enthusiastically chewing a well-loved banana toy.  Eugene and Vincent were discussing something near the study; the conversation darted between English and French, and she distantly wondered if they did that in Paris as well.

Paige skimmed what she had so far of the interview, catching snippets about weather and generators and gasoline.  She glanced out the window to see Eugene placing several orange gasoline containers in the trunk of the black sedan warming up.  She switched to her internet browser to check the forecast; the storm had two paths, it seemed, but the pattern was unpredictable and no one wanted to make a call, it seemed.

She went back to working on the interview, forcing her eyes to focus on the screen as she heard soft footsteps pass by on the way to the kitchen.  He had paused and it took everything in her to not turn her head and look at him.  To get up from the couch and brush her lips over his, to give in to everything they both wanted.

She still didn’t have an answer for him.

The wind started to pick up just as an emergency weather alert went off on her phone.  The notification stated the storm predicted to hit tomorrow evening had gained strength and had shifted directly towards the area where they were staying.  

Paige felt nerves begin to stir in her stomach as she looked out the window realizing how little she could make out through the falling snow.  She worried about Eugene, who had left a little under an hour ago with four bright orange jugs to get gas for the generators in the event the cabin lost power.  It was getting dark and the wind was whipping the snow around creating large drifts outside of the windows in Paige’s room.  

Esteban, who was curled up at the foot of her bed for most of the afternoon had woken up from a nap.  His ears went back as he let out a few soft whines; he was clearly not a fan of the storm.

You and me both little guy. Paige thought as she rubbed the dog behind the ears and reciting calming incantations in efforts to soothe him.

The lights flickered briefly before the power went out all together.  

Paige gave a yelp in surprise as the sudden shift to darkness.  She felt Esteban shift beneath her touch.  Paige pulled her phone out of her pocket the light providing only enough illumination to see directly in front of her and nothing else.

“It’s okay Esteban.  You’re a good boy; everything is okay.” She whispered.

“Paige?”  Vincents voice echoed down the hallway.  “Are you alright?”

Vincent arrived in the doorway holding a flashlight, which was a lot more useful than her phone.

“Yes, just a little startled that’s all.  I thought the generators were supposed to kick in only a few seconds after the power went out…” She began but trailed off.

“They are.  They must have had even less gas than Eugene and I had expected.” He replied.

“Shouldn’t Eugene be back by now?  Do you think he’s stuck in the storm?” Paige felt panic rise in her gut.  She already lost someone dear to her; she couldn’t bare to see any of her other friend’s get hurt.

“I was on the phone with Eugene when the power cut out.  The storm hit town before it came here and they closed the roads.  Eugene made it to a hotel but even if the roads were open it wouldn’t be safe for him to drive.” Vincent stated in a calm voice.

“As long as Eugene is safe.  I guess the heaters won’t be working with no power, huh.”  It was more of a statement that she was hoping Vincent corrected her on rather than a question.

“No, they won’t.  But I will get a fire going in the front room and there are plenty of blankets.”

Paige gave a weak nod, wishing she wasn’t as anxious as she was.

“I’ll get the fire started.  I brought you a flashlight, would you mind bringing some blankets for us?”

“Yes, of course, I can do that.”  Paige responded, taking the flashlight Vincent held out for her.

She gathered the quilt from her bed and a few more she found in the trunk at the foot of the bed.  The case closed with a sudden thud after she pulled out the covers, startling her for a moment.  Paige carefully made her way down the hall and into the living room, arms filled with blankets and flashlight balancing precariously atop the pile.

In less than an hour, the pair was sitting in front of a fire, each wrapped in their own blanket.  Had the situation not been as stress inducing as it was, Paige actually would have enjoyed this.

Despite the warmth that the blankets and fire provided, a chill ran through Paige and she wasn’t entirely sure it was completely due to being cold.  Her involuntary shiver caught Vincent’s attention.

“Are you still cold?” Vincent asked with genuine concern.

“Only a little but the fire is very nice, it helps.” Paige stated hoping he accepted the answer without further questioning.

Vincent, who was sitting next to her, moved closer to her.  Their arms were now resting against each other.  “Is this okay?” Vincent asked gently.

Paige nodded in reply as she continued watching the fire.

“I...I’m sorry about before, by the way.  And about my behavior this whole trip.  I’ve been cold toward you and it was unnecessary.  The truth is I’m scared.  Terrified really.”

“I terrify you?” Vincent replied maintaining his calm but clearly hurt by her confession.

“No, no, you don’t terrify me!  I’m just not sure I can handle getting hurt again…When I was with Raphael…” she trailed off but Vincent let her collect herself without interupting.  When she found her words, she continued. “When I was with Raphael, I really thought I was happy...for a while.  Until I realized that I was probably the farthest thing from happy I had ever been, up until Kat died that is.”

“Paige, you’re shivering, let me get you another blanket-”  Vincent rose to grab another blanket from the pile.

“No!” She reacted, reaching out and grabbing his hand, startling the man “I’m sorry, please, don’t leave. We’ll just sit closer if that’s okay.”

Vincent sat back down and Paige shifted, instead positioning herself between his legs with her back against his chest.  She could feel the warmth emanating from his body, feel his heart beating hard against her back, and she felt his breath hitch as his arms wrapped around her waist tentatively.

“Okay?” He asked.

“Warmer already.” She replied; it was the furthest thing from a lie.  She continued now that she was warmer, “I should have listened to your warnings about him… you are the only one who ever told me the truth about Raphael.  I guess now would be a good time to say ‘I told you so’”

“Paige, I would never say that to you.  Especially over something that has so deeply affected you.” He said sternly. “And, you don’t have to apologize.  You came here to do a job and I am sorry if I complicated things for you.  I have been wanting to kiss you from the moment you arrived, and yesterday I realized I pushed the boundaries farther than I should have.”

It was at Vincent’s apology that caused her to realize Raphael was the exception, not the rule.  Yes, he hurt her, but that didn’t mean Vincent would hurt her.  She was so upset at Raphael for holding her back in their relationship and now she wanted something, wanted Vincent, and she was holding herself back.  She was no longer with Raphael; if she wanted something, she could go for it.  Should go for it.

“You have nothing to apologize for either, but, thank you.” She rotated slightly so she was sitting slightly sideways toward him, one leg bent, her knee resting near his. “I’m definitely warmer sitting like this.  But, there is one part of me that’s still cold.  My lips.  Can you help me warm them?”  

Vincent leaned in, allowing her to come in the rest of the way.  As she felt his lips against hers she knew that one night was not just a fluke.  Kissing Vincent was like no other kiss she ever experienced.  The effects of the kiss radiated throughout her entire body sending warmth to every inch of her despite how frigid the room was.  Their kisses became deeper and more desperate until they ended up in a position similar to when they fell on the ice.  Vincent allowed her to be on top of him; be in control, set the pace.  Eventually they both fell asleep, a tangle of blankets and limbs intertwined.

Paige woke up warm despite the coldness of the room.  Vincent, still asleep, was holding her close to him; keeping her warm.  The weight of his arms around her made secure, happy.  A rush of emotions engulfed her at all she had shared with Vincent last night both emotionally and physically.  Memories of the kisses they shared last night flooded back to her.  

Paige smiled, realizing she had been brave enough to follow through with all of the desires she had regarding Vincent.  Well, not all of them.  A blush spread across her cheeks thinking about the one thing they hadn’t done last night.  Neither of them had wanted to move too fast.  However, the desire was there last night and it was back again now.  Especially with her body so close to his, feeling him pressed up against her.  His morning condition was of little help, which she noticed when she shifted her thigh slightly.  She watched him as he slept.   His hair was tousled from sleep and she realized she had never seen him look more peaceful or relaxed.

The wind was still pretty strong from what she could hear and she was so nice and warm.  She closed her eyes and let herself drift back off to sleep; a pleasure she more often than not denied herself.  This morning though, wrapped in Vincent’s arms, she allowed herself this small pleasure.    

Vincent woke with a start.  It took him a moment to wake up and realize that he was finally able to do what he only was able to imagine.  He was able to wake up with Paige in his arms.  He would be lying if he hadn’t wanted this all along when he first learned City of Love: Paris wanted an interview but, after the way Paige acted after their snowball fight lead him to believe this would never happen.  He was extremely glad that he was wrong, which was a first for him.  

My God, she’s beautiful.  He thought to himself as he ever so lightly brushed a strand of her hair away from her face tucking it behind her ear.  

As much as he hated the idea, he had to disentangle himself from her and get up.  He needed to check on Esteban and see if Eugene had tried to get in contact with him at all.  Cell service was not very good; texting was possible but took awhile.  

He pressed a kiss to Paige’s forehead before peeling back the covers.  He was careful not to wake her, replacing the covers so she wouldn’t get cold.  As he went about his business, his mind kept playing last night’s events.  He was hardly complaining; in fact he wouldn’t mind a repeat incident once Paige woke up.  To hear her open up to him and realize that she trusted him enough to let herself be vulnerable with him was… everything.  

Vincent fired off a text to Eugene, hoping his message would send before his phone battery died.  He placed the phone near the window to make the best of the poor service, only made worse by the storm.

On a positive note, the wind had begun to die down.  Snow was still falling but not with the intensity as it had been throughout the night.

Vincent walked into the study and turned on his laptop.  It had been charging when the power went out; it still had a decent charge left to it and because it was wired directly to the phone jack, he still had internet access until the computer died.  The joys of archaic American technology.  He tried to check the weather but the only updates were claiming the storm was dying down.

He was startled as Paige knocked on the door frame.  She was wrapped in one of the thick fleece blankets they had slept with and she held a mug in each hand.  He could see steam rising from each.

“I put the kettle over the fire to heat the milk.  I’m sure it’s not the best quality but it’s warm.”  She said as she offered a mug of steaming hot chocolate to him.

Vincent took the mug from her and took a deep sip, savoring the warmth of the beverage.

“It’s too cold in here.  Come back in front of the fire with me?”  Paige asked a hint of shyness in her voice.  As if despite all that they shared last night there was still a part of her that was afraid he would turn her down.

Vincent shut his computer and grabbed Paige’s free hand in his bringing it up to his lips to brush light kisses over her knuckles.  Hand in hand they walked back in front of the fire and wrapped themselves in each other as they watched the snow fall outside the window.

“Beautiful.” Paige stated as she was captivated by the wintery wonderland outside.

“Yes, beautiful.” Vincent replied, looking only at Paige.

Paige turn to look at Vincent, a blush rising to her cheeks.  She opened her mouth to speak but, before she could the lights flickered on.

“The power’s on!” She squealed in excitement as she wrapped her arms around Vincent’s neck.

“And look who’s back.” Vincent stated as he held Paige with one arm the other pointing to the window.  Paige followed his arm to the view of the driveway, a black sedan visible on the crisp white snow.

Esteban barked, running in a circle before jumping onto the nearest piece of furniture to look out the window.  His tail wagged as he caught sight of Eugene getting out of the car.

Paige turned to place a kiss on Vincent’s cheek once Eugene was hidden by the trunk of the car for a moment and untangled herself from his arms, as much as she didn’t want to.  “I’m going to make breakfast, I’m sure he’s exhausted.”  

Vincent hummed an agreement and let her go, scooping up Esteban moments later.  He turned and watched Paige head into the kitchen as he scratched the pug behind his ears, a faint smile on his lips.

[whitlockienterprisespresents]

I kinda hated ‘The Last Jedi’

I know a lot of people have said as much already, and normally I avoid negativity on this blog. But I saw it a couple of weeks ago and it’s still bothering me. I gotta purge. Spoilers, obviously:

Look, the whole scene with the bombers and everything was objectively cool action (and the stuff with Paige and her eventual death was top-notch, I felt the weight of that), but basic entertainment aside, it was dumb as Hell. Why would you have those insanely slow-moving bombers, with their incredibly unsafe and idiotic set-up, and not even any shields to compensate? Why wouldn’t you get something with a nice compact missile that you can fire at range? How did they even get their bombers over to the Dreadnought before the Dreadnought deployed fighters to shoot the bombers down? There’s no element of surprise when your ships move at a fucking snail’s pace. Who cares if you took out the Dreadnought’s exterior guns when they have individual fighters to blast you with anyway? How were those slow as fuck bombers supposed to get away back to the main fleet after dropping their payload? Everything about the Resistance battle plan here was moronic, and the First Order’s failure to stop them anyway was illogical.

Normally, battle tactics wouldn’t bother me so much, but they used the Pyrrhic victory with the bombers as a reason to get Poe demoted. He obviously did not formulate that entire basic-ass battle strategy on his own, so the Resistance leadership should be slapping and demoting themselves for that, not blaming the Commander who flew the mission. Poe not calling off the attempt after he took just sliiightly longer to take out the Dreadnought’s surface cannons doesn’t actually change the fact that the battle plan was idiotic to start with. If they had retreated when Leia said, and I were the First Order, I’d have sent out fighters (or just used the cannons on one of the other ships) to blast those slow-ass bombers outta the sky anyway. They were super slow, guys. You can’t just ‘oops, abort’ those back to the fleet in an instant. The bombers were sitting ducks, essentially on a suicide run to start with. That ain’t Poe’s fault, that’s the entire Resistance’s dumbfuck fault. The fact that he ignored orders is still on him, but when the whole situation is so transparently manufactured for idiotic drama, that kinda steps on the message.

Leia engaging in the ancient and odious trope of ‘woman slaps man to express her distaste for his masculine antics’ is gross. She’s a fucking General, it makes her look bad to be ineffectually slapping faces. Delete this.

I totally expected to hate Poe in ‘The Force Awakens’ coz I thought he’d be the usual cliche insufferable ‘cocky hotshot pilot’. I was delighted when he was competent without being an egotistical wanker about it. The shoddy attempt to tell some half-assed ‘toxic masculinity’ story by making him into a hothead in this movie is basically character assassination (not to mention kinda racist to play that ‘hothead Latino’ cliche?), and I am not here for it.

Leia Force-floating her way back to the ship was really embarrassing. Also, having never had her use the Force so overtly in the past, something as significant as this felt out-of-the-blue. Her prior Force use has mostly been passive connection to others over vast distances, going from that to ‘oh yeah also I’ma Mary Poppins through space’ was a lot to swallow. But my main problem was just that it looked stupid. For all its flaws, this movie was mainly very visually impressive, and this was a low moment.

Where are all the other pilots we met in ‘The Force Awakens’? Are they dead? Is every side character we met just unceremoniously dead?

Also do not approve of the implicit suggestion that Poe doesn’t respect Holdo on sight (’not what I expected’) despite knowing of her credentials in past engagements. How does he not know this person who is high up on the Resistance roster, anyway? She’s a Vice-Admiral, and there’s not that many Resistance folks anyway, at least not on these few ships. Having a not-previously-sexist character respond poorly to new (specifically female) leadership just to service the aforementioned half-assed toxic masculinity plot is some bullshit. I fucking love dismantling toxic masculinity, don’t get me wrong, but they did it fucking badly here.

P.s. why is there a guy still on the med ship when it gets destroyed? He didn’t need to be there to steer it or anything, it was out of fuel and floating dead anyway. Why did they not fully evacuate. Why.

Look. Holdo was right to NOT tell Poe what’s going on just because he demanded to know, he is not actually entitled to the information. However, there is absolutely no good reason presented as to why she wouldn’t tell THE WHOLE FLEET what her plan was; when Leia says she was more interested in ‘keeping the light alive than in looking like a hero’, that’s a nice cushy sentiment, but you know how you keep the light alive? Hope. Keeping up morale. The Resistance spends almost the entire film just...flying...running out of fuel...nothing happening for hours...there’s really no sensible reason for Holdo NOT to let everyone know that there is a plan, there is hope, so hang in there. Poe is wrong to try and mutiny, obviously, but there is no logical plot reason for the narrative pushing him to that point. It’s not about whether or not Holdo capitulates to the aggressive demands of some guy, it’s about whether or not she keeps up morale by letting her own people know they’re not actually doomed. I don’t blame her for this as a character, I blame the shitty writing that is too busy trying to tell that aforementioned half-assed toxic masculinity plot. If your characters are all behaving illogically to service it, you’re not making much of a point. This shit was weak, and it reflected poorly on the characterisation of everyone involved.

Holdo and Leia talking about how they totally like Poe and whatever also weakens this whole plot. If your toxic-masculinity narrative ends with the women who have been wronged agreeing that they like the dude anyway (despite the fact that he committed treason?), you probably did it wrong. Also, they don’t know it yet, but Poe’s actions also get almost the entire Resistance wiped out due to exposing their escape plan, so, like. Cool guy. Yeah, I like him too. Coulda avoided all of this with some incredibly normal and expected level of information-sharing, but whatever. Poe is absolved and the attempted narrative thereby rendered useless. 

Holdo’s sacrifice, taking out the First Order ships? That shit was awesome, I won’t lie. Let the record show that Holdo was great, even if the story she was stuck in wasn’t. One complaint: what the fuck with this ‘Godspeed, rebels’ line? It sticks out like dog’s balls and it sucks. Stop trying to make ‘Godspeed, rebels’ a thing.

 Two complaints, actually: bad editing makes it seem like Holdo sat around for AGES before she enacted this plan, and that makes it seem like the First Order should have shot ALL of the transports well before she got the job done. Editing fucking fail.

MEANWHILE, Finn. Why is he barely in the movie? Why is he stuck in an asinine subplot that has no ultimate impact on the plot of the film whatsoever? Bullshit. One of the best, strongest, most dynamic characters from TFA, and they waste him on some pointless idiocy that does absolutely nothing with his character template. Nothing. Coulda replaced Finn with anyone in this subplot. Better yet, replace the SUBPLOT.

If Finn and Rose could jump ship easy-peasy like that, why did the Resistance not have most of their people jump ship in the same way? They coulda dispersed all over the place and regrouped later, or at least sent out messengers to get help (or...runners...for fuel?) instead of keeping everyone in the same place to be shot at by the idiotic First Order (who could have done about a trillion other things besides just flying after some ships for eighteen straight hours. Why does no one in this movie know how to plan anything?). Kinda kills the non-existent suspense of having the Resistance stuck and running outta fuel, huh?

Rose deserved better than this useless subplot where her chief function is to exposition-dump about Canto Bight.

Just-so-happening to get locked in the same cell with a guy who has exactly the skills you’re looking for is an old cliche, not a good one, but it feels extra weak and convenient here because it’s so late in the film and also, ultimately, so pointless. So fucking pointless.

When Finn and Rose saw those racing animals, I literally sighed in frustration, because it was so obvious where the plot was gonna go. Most of the action of this movie was still fun to watch even when it was stupid. This was not one of those times.

Trashing Canto Bight is still pointless, and mostly just makes me concerned for the children minding the animals, and for the animals themselves. All the rich war profiteers will still go on, they’ll just party somewhere else for a bit while reconstruction is happening. They don’t fucking care. The poor downtrodden children, however, will be punished, and the animals will either be killed or returned to the race track, they didn’t get away, they were just right there on the hill. Finn and Rose didn’t achieve anything triumphant here, they just got the already-suffering into a worse situation. Nice job breaking it, heroes. Did I mention this was pointless? Also, anvilicious. 

Why even bother bringing Phasma back when you’re just gonna dispose of her after the briefest fight ever. TFA did a bad job of making her seem like she existed for a reason anyway, but this just hung a lantern on it. Stupid convenient pointless fight/death scene is stupid, convenient, and pointless. 

(on the subject of pointless characters: why does Maz Kanata exist? TFA at least gave her something to do, but it all just feels like Lupita Nyong’o and Gwendoline Christie were a big deal when TFA was made so they made characters for them and went ‘eh, we’ll find an actual purpose for them later’, but then they...didn’t. It’s a waste of talent, and egregious, too. You know who does exist for a reason, and yet both this film and TFA did fucking NOTHING with her? Leia. I can’t believe they wasted her so much. There are so many wasted characters in this film, and the fact that most of them are the female characters does not escape my scrutiny)

 Hux is also mostly useless, for the record. The narrative gives him more attention than he's due, considering he's basically just 'random First Order commander', he doesn't have more personality than that. I don't really require more characterisation for my neo-Nazi villains anyway, but when the character framing keeps acting like the dude matters, it gets conspicuous.  

 YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER THAN THIS??? A spy in the Resistance. The only logical reason for Holdo to NOT tell her own people that they had an escape plan would have been if there was a spy in the fleet (say, someone who could be broadcasting the signal that the First Order was tracking...); a spy in the fleet is also a good way to create some actual tension and, um, narrative, instead of the fleet just doing that flying-in-a-line-for-a-whole-day thing with the illogical Poe/Holdo drama the only complication. You can still keep the Poe/Holdo stuff! Holdo's secrecy just makes sense now! It doesn't even require that Poe not know there's a spy - he could just as easily suspect that Holdo IS the spy, or at least feel that she's not trying hard enough to find out who is and is just consigning everyone to death instead of going on a witch-hunt, there's plenty of potential for different ways to play that without losing the core story (and while also, maybe, improving it...). But most importantly: we could keep Finn ON THE FUCKING SHIP INSTEAD OF OFF HAVING A RANDO POINTLESS DRAMA. Finn, as a former Stormtrooper, would be a prime suspect for a spy in the eyes of plenty of people! People get irrational under pressure! Finn's past making people mistreat him now would be a solid way for his actual characterisation to be part of his narrative, plus opens a lot of avenues for telling worthwhile socio-political narratives! Concern for Finn's safety and the desire to prove his innocence enhances Poe's story and motivation too! Rose can easily be made part of that narrative and can go on a character journey instead of being physically transplanted places just to provide exposition and jewellery! Having two narrative threads (Rey, and Poe/Finn combined, instead of Rey, Poe, and Finn) helps streamline the storytelling AND frees up time to actual explore those narratives thoroughly instead of wasting time on useless stuff and axing important plot developments to make it all fit! I COULD GO ON LIKE THIS FOREVER!!!

I have seen a lot of people insisting that the only reason Rose professing her love for Finn ‘comes out of nowhere’ is because Rose wasn’t presented like a sex object so audiences didn’t think of her that way, but, guys, no. It came out of nowhere because the two characters just had a buddy adventure over the course of a day and now suddenly Rose is in love? After a day? Her sister died, she went on an adventure, and now she loves this guy she just met. If they didn’t try to call it a romance thing (at least not yet! I got no problem with them developing a relationship after, y’know, more than a day!), it would have worked better; she can still stop him from sacrificing himself because she cares for him as a PERSON, not as a prospective partner. We need more of those narratives, tbh, and we need more young pretty female characters who don’t spontaneously develop romance subplots just by existing. 

SPEAKING OF WHICH, Rey. Rey’s story was so consumed with Kylo Ren, I keep forgetting she was there. How did the other great break-out character from TFA get co-opted into a vehicle for the Kylo Ren sob-story? Rey barely gets her own story here, it’s all really about either Kylo, or Luke. Female protagonist reduced to prop in men’s story. Whoopdi-fucking-doodah. 

 Look. I know Mark Hamill was very vocal about how much he disapproved of literally everything written for Luke in this film. He was right, too: it's fucking OOC garbage. BUT credit where it's due: the guy is still fucking delightful. I love bitter hermit Luke, but I'm giving all the credit to Mark Hamill for doing a fantastic job with the material he hated so much (plenty of that bitterness drawn from a real place, methinks), zero credit for the writing because the writing is, indeed, moronic. It's not that I don't believe Luke could become disenfranchised after what happened at his Jedi training temple: I can't buy that he'd end up in that situation in the first place. Luke Skywalker, who famously ditched his lightsabre in front of his Actual War Criminal father, Darth Vader, and saved the day by compassionately appealing to the goodness he solemnly believed could still be found in the old man despite all the genocidal evidence to the contrary? That Luke Skywalker is not gonna look at his young currently-innocent-of-any-crimes nephew and go 'shit, you've got evil in your heart' and decide to maybe just kill the lad in his sleep. I don't even buy that 'for a second'. Dude wouldn't slice a confirmed war criminal, guys. And then even after the massacre at the temple and all, you're telling me Luke Skywalker wouldn't try to rescue his own nephew from the clutches of evil? That he wouldn't try to fix his mistake? That he'd just shrug his shoulders and mooch off and hide while his nephew got to genocidin' just like gramps used to do?? Come on guys. You might as well retroactively kill Luke at the end of Return of the Jedi and have it over with.

 Why does Luke milk a beast. Why did this happen in front of my eyes.

 They don't spend nearly enough time on Rey's interactions with Luke, it makes her 'lessons' with him feel perfunctory, and their conflicts forced. Also, Rey never gets her third lesson that Luke promised, but rather than it feeling like she just left before she could finish (as with Luke on Dagobah), it feels more like they just forgot to tie that off. As I understand, there's a whole deleted scene/sequence involving the third lesson, so it wasn't deliberately omitted, they just didn't bother to cover the editing mistake. Fuck y'all. You kept the bullshit Canto Bight animal-race, but this...

 Rey's mirror-vision thing was super boring because it was so predictable. Why did it go for so long anyway.

 I never want to see Kylo Ren's nipples again. I can't believe they shamelessly subjected the audience to this obvious bait. He's a genocidal maniac, guys. He's a mass murderer. You cannot make fetch happen with him, and it's disgusting that you're trying.

 Related: I normally barely notice/care about costuming, but there were several faux pas in this film and I was irritated. Kylo Ren's pants were one. Rey's outfits being sleeveless but thick on the shoulders was two, it made it look like she was cold and uncomfortable and walking around with her shoulders up around her ears the whole time and it made ME really uncomfortable to look at her. Three is the older women's outfits, Leia's but especially Holdo's: they're Resistance leaders, why do they look like some idiot costumer prioritised them looking like classy older women over them wearing functional practical outfits? Holdo's dress is great, objectively speaking, but in context she looks several degrees overdressed. Did she not have time to ditch the formal gown when she got called in for emergency Resistance-ing? I have seen it suggested that the outfit is supposed to be part of the whole Poe-not-trusting-her-to-know-what-she's-doing thing, and if that is indeed what they intended, it's triple stupid.

 Kylo Ren's sob story is not really a sob story. Yeah, even if your uncle was standing over your bed holding a lightsabre, that's a rough deal but it doesn't entitle you to SLAUGHTER YOUR FELLOW STUDENTS AND RUN OFF TO JOIN THE NEO-NAZIS. What the actual fuck. Why did we spend so much time on trying to pretend Kylo is sympathetic. I mean, he was also supposed to already be being seduced into evil, that's what Luke saw that made him wanna kill 'im up, so. If they wanted us to sympathise with Kylo, maybe they should AT LEAST have focused on what it was that Snoke was using to seduce him in the first place, explain what gave him the in (as deeply, wildly flawed as the prequel trilogy was, it at least did a thorough job of exploring the how-did-it-come-to-this for Anakin). I mean - same as with Anakin - explaining why someone decides that genocide and dictatorships are the way to go does not make it acceptable, and Kylo Ren would still be a whiny little dickhead in need of a nice beheading, but if they explained his susceptibility to Snoke's logic that would at least be character building. Pretending the whole training temple massacre was 1. Luke's fault, and 2. a sympathetic backstory is pretty grotesque. Great way to make it seem like a certain writer-director thinks that the neo-Nazi sith is actually an ok dude, though...

 On which note: Kylo's 'justification' for killing his own father is also, uh, not justification. Just vague-ing about 'destroying the past' does not an explanation make; maybe if we had some of that aforementioned backstory on what made Kylo so susceptible to corruption, that could also have been used to make this bullshit excuse sound slightly less bullshit? As above, it'd still be bullshit anyway, but at least it wouldn't be faking being deep quite so hard. I'm a bit embarrassed by how stupid this was. The idea that any of Kylo's 'justifying' for any of his murderous actions is convincing to Rey is an insult to her intelligence as well as the audience's.

 Remember at the start of the movie, when Kylo smashes his wannabe-Vader mask? I frowned at it then, not realising how much I was gonna end up frowning about it later: Kylo Ren sucks and has always sucked, but in TFA we had this widely-applauded portrayal of the new Big Bad being an entitled white manbaby, and everyone was talking about how great that was as a reflection of modern society's issues, etc. Smashing his Vader-mask in the elevator was the closest moment this film had to acknowledging the tantrums Kylo threw in TFA, which were simultaneously hilarious and disturbing as they did indeed reflect that kind of childish yet violent acting-out you see with entitles young white men these days. Thing is, where Kylo of TFA chucked tantrums and idolised his former-Nazi grandfather and tried to make himself in gramps' image, this movie is subtly ditching those less-than-flattering details. Kylo smashes his Vader-mask, and while Snoke at various points goes on about his potential to be 'a new Vader', Kylo himself expresses no further desire to follow in Vader's footsteps. Smashing the mask has symbolically severed him from that aim, and thus, from one of the most prominent aspects of his neo-Nazi-modelled characterisation. It's almost like a certain writer-director wants to make the character more sympathetic by giving him a 'sad backstory' and distancing him from his neo-Nazi dreams...

 Speaking of ditching plot though, there are two incredibly egregious examples here: Snoke, and Rey's parents. As much as Snoke was a dud of a character who I definitely did not care about or enjoy, and as much as disposing of him is a surprise that opens up a lot of potential for new and different storytelling, the fact that he was apparently some colossal Big Bad who appeared out of nowhere with no explanation and then was treated like a big deal only to get killed off halfway through is...weak. It doesn't seem clever, it seems like they should have just not invented him in the first place if they weren't actually gonna do anything with him. We didn't have to waste time on this.

 The 'reveal' that Rey's parents were 'nothing' is even worse, tbh. They made such a big deal out of the identity of her parents, in this film and in TFA, and TFA is retroactively weakened as a film every time TLJ ditches one of the plot threads or characters that TFA introduced, because it renders swathes of the content of TFA pointless. Not content to just be full of pointlessness yourself, huh TLJ? Gotta fuck up your predecessor too so that you don't feel lonely? I have seen it argued that Rey not having some fancy pedigree and 'coming from nothing' like a normal person instead of doing the Secret Princess trope is a great move, and I agree with that in theory, but as presented in this film? Hell no. Sure, it woulda been a huge predictable cliché if she was secretly Luke's daughter or something, and the entire universe expected that sort of a reveal so there wouldn't have been much point pretending it was a secret, but this 'reveal' feels less like a cool twist-with-commentary and more like a certain writer-director going for cheap drama points by subverting expectation for no other reason than to be shocking. This feels more like laughing in the audience's face for the fact that they FOOLISHLY expected that a built-up mystery would actually deliver a surprise. Subverting audience expectation is only clever if you have an original twist; just going 'ha! You thought there was something there but there was nothing!' is not clever, it just means the writer-director wasn't smart enough to actually find something to do with the plot set-up he was handed after the previous film. Considering how much he fucked up the characterisation of literally everyone and filled this movie with meaninglessness and plot holes, maybe that's not surprising either...

 You know what would have been surprising? Kylo ACTUALLY SWITCHING SIDES. I was so ready for them to throw us a REAL curveball by having him actually turn, and have to spend the rest of this movie and however much of the next one trying to make amends and work through all the colossal awfulness that would bring up for everyone (before, ultimately, dying a nice redemptive-sacrificial death, because the genocidal maniac is NOT allowed to live happily ever after). That woulda taken some real guts though, right, and we're all about cheap meaningless thrills that don't ultimately change anything, here.

 Why were there so many Praetorian Guard guys. I swear Kylo and Rey fought all of them twice in the course of that battle. Who choreographed this editing nightmare?

 Remember, a thousand words ago, when I started off by criticising the idiotic battle plans of the Resistance? Same goes for this useless assault they launch against the First Order cannon on Crait. Lets run these rust-buckets straight at all their guns and things, even though we've only got thirteen of them and nothing to do but drive straight at our enemies guns! Visually exciting, but completely devoid of intelligent design. Using this second DUMBASS BATTLE PLAN WHICH INEXPLICABLY GOES WRONG as a trite-neat way to show how Poe 'learned this vital lesson about when to retreat to fight again another day' is kinda undercut by the fact that the Resistance is still sending people out to die stupidly in suicide runs, so...maybe they still haven't learned the real lesson here, the one about ACTUALLY PLANNING. You wouldn't have to worry so much about your 'dead heroes' if you made sensible strategic decisions in the first place. Pretty weird, that.

 Force-projection Luke was great, but this seems like it's supposed to be demonstrating some character arc for him when actually it's just repeating his whole passive-resistance thing from the original trilogy, just in a less significant way; as a projection, he's not actually endangered as he was with Vader, so it's less of a statement and more of an '...oh yeah I literally can't fight you anyway, peace out I'm dead now regardless'. Like most things in this film, it's only surface-level cool, as soon as you engage thought processes it becomes as empty as a Jedi cloak in the wind...

 Rey and Poe apparently meeting for the first time at the end of the movie was Hella jarring. They may not have met on-screen in TFA, but they were on the Resistance base at the same time, both personally attached to Finn, etc. We coulda just assumed they had met at some point before Rey left. This awkward meeting was awkward and also hung a big ol' lantern on the fact that our characters all got split off for completely different adventures in this movie instead of doing anything together, like, pretty much at all. Nice.

 Why does this film end so many times. At first I thought it was gonna end after the space battle, and then there was this whole extra action scene on Crait and I was like 'that's weird, why would you add an extra small action piece AFTER your big climactic space battle?', then I thought it was gonna end on a cliffhanger with Luke stepping up to confront the First Order alone (they had this shot from behind, showing the fire around him and the First Order arrayed out across the horizon, and the music was swelling and it would have been a PERFECT cut to credits, but then it cut to Poe's face instead and I was like 'whaaatt, momentum of final shot destroyed!'). Then I thought they were gonna end after everyone got away, but THEN there was that useless end scene of the kids back on Canto Bight being like, sooo filled with Resistance Feelings, and it was fucking dumb. Why would you include such a weak finisher when you had at least three solid final moments already? Honestly I think there were several other almost-ends in there that I'm forgetting now (like maybe also right before the fight on Crait started? I dunno). It was a mercy when they finally picked an ending, but it was the worst ending they had at their disposal.

 Am I finished purging now? Probably not. I'll probably think of a bunch of other things after I post this, plus I see a lot of dumb posts and articles defending various aspects of the film, some of which I can shrug off as differences of opinion, and some of which stick in my head for being nonsense to rival the film itself. For every whiny neckbeard out there complaining about diversity and 'woman heroes', there's a 'progressive' writer who defends the decisions in this movie for seemingly no other reason than because it makes the neckbeards upset, and that's just annoying. You can admit that the movie sucked without that meaning that the misogynists were right, the two options are mutually exclusive, and you lend credence to all the problematic crap this movie pulled if you refuse to admit its flaws. But whatever. It wasn't the worst film I ever saw. It was mostly irritating because of how much potential it had, if someone had just bothered to do a proper critical edit of the script and maybe think about telling cohesive stories with it and maintaining characterisation across the franchise, etc. Maybe the third film of the trilogy will fix some of the shit from this film, but the fact will remain, it shouldn't have to. Trying to patch up the holes made by the previous film should not be part of the third film's job; this movie shoulda just been solid to start with. A lot of what was bad about it is structurally unsound anyway, and a third film won't change that. This movie was a dud. A stupid, largely pointless dud. Delete this.