#if I was god Id be a giraffe

[shit-people-probably-didnt-say]

How do we know god isnt a giraffe

[ftm-megamind]

remember when i made that one silly presentation about newsies and what bugs they would be. well. behold... bugsies!!! warning for bugs (cartoonish) under the cut

first off, david as a stag beetle!

then we have jack as an ashworth's rustic!

crutchy--giraffe weevil!

and final (for now), race as a dung beetle (with a cigar)!

psst. feel free to drop an ask of who else i should draw as a bug. i have already set headcanons for some other characters, but thinking of new ones will be fun too!!!

[cryingforcrocodiles]

time to get that chef from the dutch team and bring that chicken curry cause i’m scared https://twitter.com/xgphilosophy/status/1642195090704564226?s=46&t=L2KLcEi19_BPiOEooUnKiQ

......... we can beat them. we can definitely beat them. beat them... so fucking bad yeah. mhm. yep. will be a challenge. big challenge mhm. but one will try our hardest to win. yup.

[maculategiraffe]

tagged by @dsudis to share the story behind my url! (dira yours is awesome btw)

heh. well. mine was lowkey supposed to be a throwaway? like I wanted to post my weird kinky dead dove id fic somewhere and I certainly wasn't going to do it on the livejournal where people knew me irl. and I didn't know if anybody was even going to read it and I definitely didn't expect people to still be recognizing me by this name seventeen years later or I might have stressed out more about what to name my secret kinky lj

but anyways it's from a t.s. eliot line that I was taken with because of course "maculate" isn't a word we usually use. we use "immaculate" to mean "spotless" but we don't use "maculate" to mean "spotted." and I especially liked using it to describe a giraffe because a giraffe isn't the opposite of immaculate in a bad way. it's not dirty, or stained. it's dappled. and glory be to god for dappled things

so I just liked the phrase and then people did like my story and I found a community and people started calling me mac for short and I got some kind of unexpected name euphoria about it and so it turned out this was my url forever and ever amen

would honestly love to hear anyone's url backstory. love self-chosen name stories. consider yourself tagged?

[sugudoe]

Hello!! I hope you're doing well and hope you continue to do as well. I have recently stumbled across your account and I was wondering if I could get a JJK man match up (ITS HONESTLY SO EXCITING TO READ AND YOU DO IT SO WELL ❤️ 🥹)

So well about me:

- Considering my ethnicity, I can be considered pretty average tbh maybe 167 cm and a bit chubby but nothing on the extreme.

- For my personality, I can be considered the quite kid like not the mysterious one just someone who likes to keep to herself and just keep up a good appearance in front of professors/teachers. I can be very closed off like you can spit poison down my ears and I will not give you any reaction if I deem you to be unlikable. This often comes off as rude and at times I struggle to talk to others as well due to my high social anxiety (yes, I overthink A LOT). I fo not have that much friends either and it's a struggle when I have to talk to new people but I am pretty adaptable so if I am in a new place, I will just adjust to my surroundings without making any fuss. I hate when people order me to do something or just deem me unworthy due to their attempt at generalization. Besides that I am polite and will speak to you a lot if you're my friend and let you in about my life.

-For my likes and dislikes and interests. I am a writer here on tumblr as well as in ao3 and I like to do traditional art. In my heart, I am very girly like I love to dress up, I like make up, Taylor Swift, I love wearing heels and I do LOVE pink. In entertainment media, I watch and consume everything as long as it's entertaining let it be books, manhwa, Manga, anime, movies as long as the stories appeal me, I will watch/read it.

-As for irl i am omw to pursue my dream as a medical student and hope to be a doctor someday.

Well so... that's it for me. I hope you look into this. Thank you <3

a/n: hii, thank you!! hope you like this, and hope you become an amazing doctor someday 🤍 also, i haven’t decided the layout of the matches, so it’s all a mess, sowy!

⁀➷ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠. . . ﹫ 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘰 ��� ༉‧₊📬

You were extraordinary to the Jujutsu world, had just graduated high school, carrying your id of special grade sorcerer, many tried to get in your good grace, only to be met with a wall, be a blank face or your cursed technique ── the ability to change your surroundings, creating an illusion for the receiver. You would take their distraction as a lead to sneak away.

Choso, newest member of the good guys club, found your abilities impressive. Still he, much quieter than you could ever be, ignored you. Not in a rude way, more in an understandable manner. He saw how others would try to run you down, how the high ups had futile attempts of commanding you, and many tried to use you. He thought, in his innocent mind, that you wanted peace, so he let you be.

Soon, that picked your interest.

Like an apprehensive cat, you approached him slowly. And like a comprehensible human, he found adorable how your presence had become constant. Always in the background, shifting your attention anywhere until it landed on him. He would smile politely, but would never approach. You did, and thank God you did.

You didn’t speak much, just telling him of a mission you both were assigned, before leaving the room right away. If it wasn’t for your constant search for him, Choso would think that you, like many others, saw him as his past ── evil, a villain. Somehow, he knew deep down you didn’t. That was enough for him to always smile at you.

Your mission was easy, he mostly talked with curiosity in his voice, asking about anything, and you politely answered. Until, you became more and more… normal. Even craving his questions.

Choso and you were in a park, walking along a river, when he said he had never seen a giraffe, he knew how tall they were, and their colors, but couldn’t picture it. For the first time, you used your technique on him, and also for the first time, you used it for good on someone.

Then, he asked to see butterflies, a garden of magnolias, and lastly, a dinosaur.

For the last, though, you decided to take him on a museum when you both returned home. A museum turned into a stargazing picnic, to a beach sunrise date, to a stabilized relationship.

Choso curiosity wont ever go away, that’s something you learn after showing him everything and experimenting most of it. This wonder, though, has shifted mostly to you. He finds you the most fascinating thing the world could ever had created, and it’s far from being only because of your powers. For him, they are just dust compared to your whole self.

So, with a shy expression, you show him your writing, your arts, your clothes and favorite songs, how tall you can get with your heels and how much you love pink ── to your astonishment, the boy that always dress in black, has taken a liking to it as well. Obviously, he likes because you do, but you will find some decorations with pink in his house and smooch his flushed cheeks right away.

─┈ ⭑ ° ⋆ FUN FACTS 𓂃ᰔ

📥 ┊ you tell him of your plan to leave the jujutsu world and become a doctor, he believes you can, and he hopes to become a photographer, so he can picture everything he finds fascinating, mostly you.

📥 ┊ he soon learns to grow his own taste in media consumption, food and places. still, he loves yours as well, so it’s a common sight to have him by your side, sharing an earphone, reading the same books and mangas, or watching tv shows.

📥 ┊ he will throw a fit if you watch or read a chapter before him.

📥 ┊ best boyfriend ever.

[sheinthatfandom]

I am so stressed and am just rambling about any and everything under the cut.

Sent in the letter of intent for homeschooling. Still going back and forth over the ihip if I should use the one from the HSLDA site or just do my own. Also still trying to plan out everything for the coming school year. I really think we’re probably going to move. I think being closer to hubby’s cousins will be better for us but I’m also scared of moving cause like what if we move and the new place just falls apart? What if we get another storm like sandy and everything ends up underwater? At least up here where we are now we know the houses history we know we can withstand a storm like that and also we’re far enough away from the shoreline it’s not so bad. But also beanies birthday is next week and I’m already feeling like I’m gonna be letting her down. All this kid wants is to go to a hotel. And yes Disney world but also she wants to be in a hotel like…. We planned for a zoo trip. The cousin has a pass we can use there’s a chance Beanie could actually get close to the giraffes which is her favorite animal depending on where they’re walking that day she might be able to get close without binoculars. We’re trying for passports and the women at the post office freaked me out so bad I had to call @noodilyhooligan cause I do not want to give away my id and send it anywhere and they said not a copy but even she was like no it’s a copy like that shit makes no sense to take my drivers license and not let me drive back home like what. Oh and tomorrow is the birthday of beanies best friend and they’re having a party but beanie is the only one invited so we had to rush to find and buy some gifts today and it’s not much which instantly made me feel bad. But also I think that’s part of how I was raised to that you need to gift a lot to show love and affection or else you’re a a failure and everyone will talk badly about you. And I still need to sit down with hubby and figure out if we’re going to do the other towns library events cause the one here in our town are only have 2 days that beanie can join in cause the kids librarian they had retired and they aren’t really doing much this summer for her age group. And those things we need to sign up in person so we gotta discuss which ones we want to do and when we are gonna drive over to sign up for it. I also need to go through all out clothes cause my only dark shirts are wrestling shirts that says shit like scissor me daddy ass and blood is beautiful so can’t have that for a passport photo. And beanies godfather was supposed to be having surgery today and thanks to the office ducking up he will now have it next month and he’s in pain. Poor guy my heart goes out to him and we wanted to do something for him but like what? And he’s the one whose helping us with the Disney trip cause we’ve never been don’t know shit about it hell we’ve never even been to Florida so like not sure if that’s happening at all now cause he was gonna take a trip with his family first and then go down with us after. I also need to look up record keeping books. I know I need an attendance sheet for beanie but the nys website is fucking hot garbage when it comes to showing an easy to follow step by step homeschool guidelines or requirements. Like one paragraph even states like oh this blank thing needs to be done by like august 1 1988 and can not be sent any later like…. Why is this even here? I also need to look up a book series beanie and I can read together. We have our fun books we read, she has books she reads to us or to herself but I was thinking like something we can read together as like school work but not sure what. She’s far too young for the classic stuff so I was thinking I gotta look that up. And god that’s not even getting into the things I still haven’t even started doing for me, my business or things hubby needed me to do. Hubby says I should look into getting back on anxiety meds but honestly the ones I was on didn’t do shit to help. I think just venting now and then helps me more and let’s my rambling jumbling messy thoughts sort themselves out better.

At least I was approved for the teachers discount thing so that helps a lot. Even if we don’t move right now the cousin is a former public school teacher now homeschooling so I have someone I can talk to and ask general advice of since both states are vastly different in how they treat homeschooling families. And they don’t live unbelievably far like if we wanted to we could probably do something multiple times a month like a sorta co teaching thing since both kids are in the same grade. And we did make the appt already for the passport so it’s happening I can just go to staples and make copies of everything and keep it in my own folder. If they want it I’ll have it and if they don’t or wanna make their own copy than they can do that. The kid probably won’t even care what we gift her honestly if beanies the only one invited it probably means way more to her to just play with my kid and hug her for an hr or two like they usually do. I’m probably just over thinking everything like normal. If I have to I can also just turn my shirt inside out if I can’t find a dark color t shirt at Walmart. Hubby’s disability stuff is his to deal with and he has his lawyers and he’s got that handled. That’s not a problem I need to be borrowing and worrying about. I gotta trust him and his team to fight with nys and get approved. We can just call her god father and just ask him if he needs or wants anything. If he’s up for visitors maybe we can go down and visit him maybe bring him our heater and see if that helps the pain if he puts heat on it. Okay yeah that some plans. Okay I feel better lol

[destinationtoast]

So, Toasty, how's it going having a cat with diabetes?

Well, it involves a lot more cats in space helmets than I expected, and a lot fewer insulin injections. (So far.)

The big gray boy, Tico, has diabetes. The two girls do not, but they are currently the only ones eating prescription diabetes food, served inside their little cat-stronaut suits (as Ms. Avocado dubbed them). It's a long story. We'll get there.

When we got Tico's diagnosis, the vet said the path to improved Tico health was:

New diet (switch to wet food, and give more limited portions)

Insulin injections 2x/day

Regularly monitor blood glucose levels

But then I got the additional piece of information that you aren't supposed to give a cat insulin unless they've just eaten at least 1/4 of their daily food portion pretty recently. Otherwise, you are overdoing the insulin, and they can get very sick. And unfortunately, my cats are free-feeders, and Tico is a grazer who eats approx two (2) kibbles each time he visits the food bowl. So, new goals and new priorities:

Get Tico to eat enough dry food at one time (2x/day) to give insulin

Start insulin injections

Regularly monitor blood glucose levels

Switch to wet food once he's eating enough (I also found out that they food they're currently on is among the most highly recommended dry foods for diabetic cats, so it's less urgent)

I tried switching them to eating 2x/day, removing their food bowls at other times. They got very frantic, and the two girls would immediately scarf down food whenever food was present. However, Tico got stressed and just stopped eating. The vet was more worried about him not eating than she was about whether he was getting insulin immediately. So, new plan:

Get Tico to eat again and stop stressing

More gradually switch to eating dry food 2x/day

Once he is eating enough at one time, start insulin injections

Regularly monitor blood glucose levels

Switch to wet food gradually

At the advice of the vet, we went back to free-feeding temporarily until Tico calmed down. At her advice, I also put out some of the prescription wet food, separately from his normal food, just to see if Tico might like it. The girls swooped in and gobbled it up. Tico wanted nothing to do with it. Sigh.

Oh, also in here, we tried to take Tico in to get a demonstration of how to give him insulin, and to run some follow up tests -- but I ended up just taking an impressive neck scratch into the vet and seeing a demonstration on a stuffed cat instead, and then watching some YouTube videos along with the vet tech, ahaha. Also, the exam room only had pictures of dogs up on the walls, and no cats at all??

Oh, and also CHICKEN representation before cats??!? Rude.

A couple days later, Tico did seem to chill out and start eating again after a couple days of free-feeding (while continuing to disdain the wet food). So the vet suggested we then try to do mealtimes 4x/per day, and more gradually wean down to two -- and that I "carefully monitor" Tico's intake and only start injections once he's reliably eating plenty.

Monitoring anything with one ravenous cat (Winter) and two extremely wary ones (Tico and Bennet) is difficult -- and controlling portions would be even more so. But Past Me had cleverly ordered SureFeed smart feeders -- the cat-stronaut helmets! -- and they arrived earlier this week. They have RFID readers that pair with each kitty's microchip, and then they only open the lid when that kitty is trying to eat. And then they send your phone notifications like this:

So new goals:

0. Make sure the cats were microchipped when they were kittens (DONE, thank god; the alternative would be to train them to wear collars now with little ID chip tags hanging off them, and my kitties would NOT enjoy collars)

Set up new space helmet feeders, but with all the "smart" features like the automatic lids turned off

Watch kitties run away and hide for a good long while

Watch kitties giraffe their necks out to max length and sniff feeders very suspiciously

Put the feeders into pairing mode (lol) and then lure kitties to the feeders using their new diabetes-friendly treats (mmmm, dehydrated salmon), so that the feeders can register their microchips

Watch kitties get hungry and very grudgingly start to eat from these new strange feeders, still without any of the "smart" features turned on... including watching them sometimes fish the food out with their paws so that they don't actually have to put their heads into the scary space helmets <- we're here right now

(Next step) Use the space helmet feeders' Training Mode to slowly start moving the automatic lids (which will eventually cover up the bowls) a little bit whenever the feeder detects that the correct kitty is nearby

Watch the kitties jump into the air and run and hide (presumably)

Get the kitties gradually used to the lids moving more and more

Eventually, the automatic lids will cover the bowls most of the time, and the feeders will only open the lids for the correct kitty

YAY! Now we can do per-kitty portion control and monitoring!!

Once Tico is relaxed and eating enough at one time, start insulin injections

Regularly monitor blood glucose levels

Switch Tico to wet food gradually (the girls are VERY enthusiastic about the wet food, lol, which is not a bad thing -- they can all make that switch. The only reason I didn't give them wet food before was that I was gone a lot and just leaving out food for them, and that works better with dry food)

Practice wrapping Tico up in a towel regularly and picking him up/moving him a little bit now and then, so that he's calmer about it and easier to take to the vet in the future (and also keep putting treats in his carrier in the hopes that he starts wandering in and out of there more of his own accord) <- actually we're kind of doing this now, too. But he hates it, and I don't want him to get so jumpy that he won't sit still for brushing + injections, so we're not pushing it

The one time my lil dude voluntarily got into his carrier.

While we're working our way up to the stabby steps (11 & 12), I'm simulating insulin injections to get Tico used to the ritual of it. He's extremely hard to catch or hold in place when I want to put into a carrier (or god forbid try to trim his nails or something), but otoh he LOVES sitting next to me on the couch and getting brushed with something toothy:

"Hey Tico -- do you want THE BRUSH???"

He comes over excitedly quivering his lil tail any time and meowing bossily any time I offer him the brush. (He's a little masochist who just wants all his hair pulled out all the time -- we had to stop brushing him as much as he wanted because he started getting little bald patches, so now it's a special treat lol.) And then he jumps up onto the couch and loafs right next to me, facing away from me, so I can easily brush him -- which is also exactly where I would want him to be if I were to give him an injection. So I've been brushing him a little bit after meals and pinching his scruff, and it's been going well. I think he'll actually adapt quite easily to my doing the toothy brushing + a quick jab in the scruff (which cats hardly feel).

Doing the glucose monitoring might be harder. But I am not worrying about that step yet, aside from having ordered a home glucose monitoring system for cats! (Also not worrying yet about how I have to catch him in 12 days to board him at the vet, where they will run a few more tests on him and give him insulin, assuming he eats and doesn't just go on hunger strike due to the stress of being boarded for the first time ever.)

At least we caught the diabetes early, so even though I should be giving him insulin as soon as possible, it's not as dire as it could be.

But. Yeesh. This is all kind of a lot! I remember all this being much easier for my parents when their kitty got diabetes, because he was the world's most nonchalant cat. Mine are not that. :) But we shall get through this time of stressful transitions, and then a lot of this will hopefully be much easier.

[hisuianhellion]

Are you in the past? How is it? Have any brushes with God? Which is to say Arceus, of course.

- Anon ID. 57189

... I spotted you talking to Rosie about the French language. You're from Earth, aren't you? Holy hell. Aight, good to know I'm not alone aside from the occasional other faller! That's the term, right?

Yep. I'm stuck in the past, but arguably it ain't too bad. If I didn't have a phone that could use whatever strange shit is happening in the space-time right above to connect to you guys, I'd be singing a different tune, but I still have access to info and some idle games to keep my fingers busy. Plus, with the DS someone sent, I do be havin' Kirby........ I miss my game consoles tho. Kinda wanna play Spyro again.

Also yes I am actually in regular contact with the not-a-giraffe. He... people on this app really just do not have a high opinion of him for some reason. I can't say I see why. He's hilariously out of touch, but. He seems to mean well.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

SISHSJSJ ok wait you’re full on selling me on the hydration idea now wait the goodra hydreigon opposite vibes plus the territorial behavior study sort of thing??? Ok lowk im glad you did some reworking (couldn’t be me id probably flip a table atp) HUT IM GLAD YOU MADE IT WORK because the more i read the more I was like “haha….what if….” Ok I was actually contemplating asking like what if you replaced Dragalge with hydreigon but I figured you probably had some insane type matching involved in that and besides dragon their other typing isn’t the same so I was just like “er yeah idk”

UAHAHAHA LUNA GETTING DOWNGRADED TO A MUK sorry no hate to muk fans i just think its so goofy and its just like the classic team rocket/enemy team grunt pokemon HSHSHSH but yeah Luna will make do fs thank god for your big brain I feel like readers team also feels more stacked now LMAO

EVIL TEAM NAGI LNFAOOO real??? I love the matchups though it’s like that one meme pic of the pink Barbie looking house right next to the pitch black one

LMAOO pursuit is an itoshi free zone…we will note have Emo eyelashes here

OOOH ok very slay ik some pokemon characters have wild designs or very themed designs so wasn’t sure if that was gonna get mixed up or not the crow feather iridescent does slap though

MAMA Y PAPA imagine its a like one of those “a day in the life” videos and imagine garchomp and nidoqueen are also wearing matching aprons like karasus while they deal with all the babies (im also specifically thinking that there’d be some moments wheres there’s the excessive pink flowery aura used in some anime/manhwas where it’s like happy sunshine rainbow family LMAO you can probably tell that’s one of my favorite meme formats)

LMAOO exactly get the best of both worlds the ultimate angst crack fluff combo

After reading your drafts/outline/thoughts for the future peregrine chapters that Nagi is probably the most down bad person to exist like down bad to the point that NAGI is speeding over to catch up to reader before she leaves like bro is MOVING??? Insane ok but fr is some hardcore yuki stan could just throw out some ideas or thoughts I don’t think itd be hard for me to see the vision/get converted just need some guidance….

AHAHAH omg imagine a tabieita breakup SHSHSH ok wait im pretty certain ive read a fic on here that was actually kinda tabieita beef except I think it was like Karasu liked reader but reader liked otoya after Karasu introduced him to her and then in the end he runs to her house in the rain trying to confess before it’s too late but otoyas already in her house and they’re just hanging out and he’s like ok nvm like ok way to step on my heart that fic had me reeling

OAEU BAROU????? GUSUAISKSOSKSKS IM SO READY I CANT WAIT TO READ IT AND SEE NIKO SIDEKICK TOO LMFAOAOAOA

THATS EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT “haha…nice…” is SO Isagi coded he would totally say something like that (I’m pretty sure he DOES when his old classmate tada is like lmaoooo u just got lucky with that shot no skills lmaoooooooo) wait I love that LMAOO that’s actually the perfect approach to not making it angsty just make Isagi stupid /j LMAO but whether he’s just dense or stubborn or both I feel like that matches his vibe either way soooo

It looks like Mario and Luigi got fused with a piranha plant because what the fuck is that……..but fr tbh I thought I had convinced myself that I’d continue playing anyways just for the sake of following through and I enjoy the gameplay generally too but the new designs I CANNOT I mean I get it because they’re already made so many pokemon they’re probably bound to run out of ideas esp if the design team isn’t changing much but wtf is Gen 9….like I pulled up the dex for serebii and they’re so ugly SHSGSHS also the weird past future versions of old Pokemon whyd suicune become a dinosaur and raikou a giraffe??????

STAY STRONGGGGG real though just like the tags here the edits of them are SO abundant like pleaseee where is the variety!!! But tbh with the way u20 arc goes plus how saes nonexistent in nel I think it would take eightbit their entire studios worth of budget to make me convert so

Oooooh icic im not as in tune to interaction patterns so I lowk didn’t realize that might be the case LOL based off your rules for no exact repeats of trope and character are allowed hopefully the next three will give enough room/inspo for non overlapping ideas though! I’m assuming you’ll probably be safe plus what are the odds right….

LMAOOO imagine once pursuit picks up people are gonna think you’re a Barou blog /j if people actually start fully associating you with sae idek how id react atp it’s so ironically funny…no actually dw when peregrine eventually makes its big comeback people will all go back to their roots and be like “oh yeah this is that really good nagi series yup this is the nagi blog” LMAO

AHAHAH BAYOSAGI in the back as npcs deadpanning like “bro wtf” while aiku and arbok are vibing our running around trying to look cool and pick up girls

Wait I got distracted and forgot to send this earlier but talk abt perfect timing literally right when I choose to come back here and send this in ITS BEEN PUBLISHED BAROU OAEUUUH

- Karasu anon

YESS WE MADE IT WORK i’m so glad i love hydreigon and reader having one matches the vibes of her team so well LMAOAO like between gyarados houndoom and hydreigon alone her team is 50% demons that everyone is afraid of but they LOVE her and they’re actually just sweet and cuddly (actually hydreigon is going to be lowkey sassy but still he really likes reader just can be a bit teenager-ish at times) BRO THE REWORKING HAD ME CRASHING OUT NGL i was literally typing a response to your ask where hydreigon is the starter and donphan is replaced by nidoking but dragalge is replaced by espeon (in a situation where otoya and reader get eevees at the same time) at the same though i was just like 😐😔 the whole time because while espeon provided some type coverage it just felt so BASIC and reader’s team is meant to be fairly non-basic the halfway through typing out the explanation i was like wait…keep houndoom keep the theme get rid of the members we don’t care as much abt and BOOM done and done

LMAOOO no because there truly just aren’t enough poison types and ig muk is decently good…his star is his roserade anyways so it’s fine we’ll just have muk be one of the first pokémon he throws out!! wait also reader having a nidoking is so cute imagine it becomes friends with hiori’s nidoqueen 🥹 DHDKSJS okay wait do you remember the quick ball idea we had w phanpy…lowkey it would be even funnier with deino (baby hydreigon) because they’re not really found in the area so reader’s going ham trying to catch it and accidentally uses all of karasu’s quick balls?? HAHAAH hold on actually this could be done right around the arc where otoya gets his happiny (in that arc otoya flirts with a nurse joy too hard and accidentally gets himself and reader involved in busting a pokémon abuse ring) maybe deino escaped from that ring and that’s what tipped nurse joy off to its existence as well as being an explanation for why there’s a random deino wandering around!!

NO THAT’S EXACTLY THE VIBES like all of reader’s pokémon are 👹💥😈 and nagi’s are 🧚🏻‍♀️✨💖 meanwhile reader herself is super kind + gentle looking (and she actually is) and nagi’s the king of idgaf who would sell anyone out (except reader) for a lukewarm donut (jkjk he’s sweet too just not in the same way as reader)…i honestly rlly like the dichotomy plus reader having all villainous seeming pokémon adds to the “team x thinks she’s one of them” vibe in the beginning of the story…agreed her team is much more stacked now i like it!! zero weak links it’s all absolute monsters i KNOW the league conference hated to see her coming 😓

the most the itoshis get is a mention that they live in another region in like the isagi ova…maybe sae’s an elite four member and since in my mind the elite four candidacy process includes traveling abroad and training with the elite four members there perhaps isagi knows of the itoshis via that?? that’s why he’s not around when barou’s abt to challenge the champion too he’s in a diff region which is why he doesn’t know what actually happened to barou

HAHAHA you know how doggy daycares irl send like updates of what your pet is doing imagine the spin off is just karasu taking photos of all of the daycare pokémon up to stuff so we have garchomp and nidoqueen in the aprons looking after everyone and karasu with his camera just clicking away and each scene starts with like an image with a handwritten caption and then it zooms into the image and we see the scene it’s describing 🥹

NAGI INVENTED DOWN-BAD-ISM peregrine nagi my beloved…he is super simple with his gestures BUT it’s like the smallest things mean so much with him!!! agreed i need a yuki fan to enter my inbox and show me the light LMAAOAO

HAHA i think i read that fic too i was like bruh in no universe (except hollyhock) would i choose otoya over KARASU that was before miraeita was real too so it was especially emo to read

DJDSHSJA OAEU BAROUUU YESS i hope you like it!! it is SUCH a silly story 😭 but yeah agreed isagi not necessarily rejecting her just refusing to accept that she’s confessing is so him i think it’s perfect (and that way isagi stans can still imagine that he does secretly like them)

no because all of the new pokémon keep getting uglier and uglier and they keep doing stuff with the old ones and from i’ve heard the gameplay isn’t that good 😔 i’ll stick w my gen vi and before games thank you very much 🤩

LMAOO you’re so right the itoshi edits are everywhere it’s so funny…hopefully the love is spread during s2 but the good thing abt being a nagi lover is he also gets a lot of edits and content due to having a lot of s1 screentime so at least I’ve got that going for me

yeah just based on my guesses/what usually happens all of the people that follow me and would’ve requested have already done so!! so it’ll be randoms for the last three spots but they likely won’t find my account until i post the first event posts and those gain traction ☝🏻 unless people find me via oaeu barou and happen to see my event ig 🧐

PLS technically pursuit is a nagi story so hopefully once it picks up people will associate me w nagi?? although you’re right in that it is very barou centric so it might give me more of a barou reputation (for example the funeral invite that people keep liking) HAHAA no because somehow seabird is my most popular bllk work?? ig it is pretty good but come on now guys…read bfb…read hollyhock…LMAO PEREGRINE NEEDS A COMEBACK ASAP THE WORLD NEEDS TO REMEMBER WHO MY MAN IS

HAHAAH bayosagi are so done with aiku they all think he’s a major dumbass but he’s also a genius?? considering he’s supposed to become a professor and all…the bayosagi + aiku dynamic is hilarious i honestly love the prequel group just as much as i love reader and co + mc trio they’re so silly yet so sweet

WE LINKED UP YET AGAIN FKDKSJ looking forward to hearing your thoughts!! i think i’ll take a break from the oaeu for a sec after this to work on other stuff but the barou version is nice and long so that should tide people over

[spiritstein]

What Is Your Favorite Blug

god there's too many bugs to just pick A Favorite!!! so here's a list of some that come to mind as particularly good bugs (under a readmore because i'm very very autistic) i'll stick to true insects here because if i included spiders and myriapods i'd be here all night

lepidopterans were what made me start loving bugs as a kid and they're still very dear to me now. my favorite when i was little was the blue morpho (morpho menelaus, i have a preserved one and these guys are SO shiny no photo can truly do them justice) but my current #1 lepidopteran would have to be the cecropia moth (hyalophora cecropia, largest moth in north america! also just look at that widdle face)

it's impossible to go wrong with the humble beetle but some that stick out to me are stag beetles (family lucanidae, super hard to id to species) and weevils (superfamily curculionoidea, the ones here are the giraffe and acorn weevils)

cicadas and roaches both get flack for being just noisy or just pests but they are still both important to their environments and can be very pretty as well. this guy (huechys sanguinea) is probably my favorite cicada as it's very much a bug after my own heart and the emerald cockroach (corydidarum magnifica) is probably one of your best contenders if you want to prove to someone that roaches can be pretty

honorable mentions to the giant wētā (genus deinacrida) for being So God Damn Big and praying mantises in general because i think they are very cool but am not well versed enough with them to have a spotlight species aside from orchid mantises which i'm pretty sure everyone knows about

tldr: impossible question there are millions if not billions of species of insects and we discover new ones all the time, how can i choose just one with so many options???

[lesfeldickbiblestudy]

What really happened during Noah's flood? [convertplayer id="mbPLCYgww" width="700" height="525"] NOAH, "SECURITY OF THE BELIEVER" Turning to Genesis 7. We're ready to take a good look at Noah's flood, and I'm going to explode a lot of myths. There is a common picture that comes to mind when we talk about Noah's ark. We immediately get the picture of a little rowboat type thing with a little shed in the middle and a giraffe standing on deck looking over the edge. That goes back to our Sunday School materials when we were kids, and shows you how impressionable young minds are. The ark was not just a little row boat. Instead, as we pointed out a few weeks ago, the ark was an enclosed rectangular box. It was built, not to sail across the sea - it wasn't going anywhere in particular - but it was built to withstand the awful rigors of the flood. The secret of this is in Gen. 7:11. The only thing that probably 99% of the people who have read of this flood have considered was the 40 days and nights of rain. Years ago, as I was teaching this, I had several pastors in my class. After class, one came up and said, "Les, you just shot out of the saddle one of my best sermons!" I replied, "I'll bet I know how you preached it. You said, `it rained, and the water got ankle deep, and somebody said, `Hey, old Noah was right,' and they came knocking on the door. When it got knee deep, a few more woke up; when it got up to their waists, a few more.'" He admitted he always taught it that way. It made a great sermon but it wasn't Biblical! They had no time to look for cover. It was instantaneous, absolute mayhem and cataclysmic destruction. Genesis 7:10-12 "And it came to pass after seven days, that the waters of the flood were upon the earth. In the six hundredth year of Noah's life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened. And the rain was upon the earth forty days and forty nights." The seven days referred to in verse 10 are those "seven days of grace" we mentioned in a previous lesson. After Noah, his family and the animals were all on the ark, the door was left open and the gangplank down and anyone who wished, still could have come in, but no one did. Then, God shut the door. "In the second month" - When months are mentioned in Scripture, April is considered the first month of the year, so this would have been the month of May. … "On the same day all the fountains of the great deep burst open, and the floodgates of the sky were opened." Here is the secret. On one day everything hit and hit hard. It didn't just begin to rain with water rising slowly (previously, in Genesis 1:6,7, we noted that after the earth was flooded during a previous judgment, not on man, but probably on an angelic kingdom. God was preparing it for human habitation). Genesis 1:6,7 "And God said, `Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.' And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament: and it was so." I'm of the conviction that at that point in His restoration, God raised half of the water that had been flooding the planet and placed it in a huge vapor belt somewhere out in space; that laid the foundation for the amazing spring-like weather that enveloped the planet from one end to the other. The earth had a constant spring-like climate, and because it was constant, there was no "weather;" no storm clouds; and the Bible can accurately say it never rained, but that God watered the things that needed water from beneath. In Genesis 7, as Noah was building the ark and started talking of a great rain to come, the people probably couldn't understand what he was talking about. Even though as we have discussed, the technology of that day was fantastic, probably something equivalent to what we have today or more, yet they couldn't comprehend water coming down from above because they'd never experienced rain.

All of a sudden it began to rain all over the planet, and that was the first time the people probably began to give credence to what Noah had said. But before they had time to react to that thought all the fountains of the great deep were broken up. Analyze that for a moment. What do we usually think of when "the deep" explodes out above the surface? We call it a volcano. So if you can picture it in your mind, (and I'm going to get you to expand your imagination here as far as I can), all around this planet there were volcanic eruptions, and along with these eruptions there were gigantic earthquakes. This whole planet went into convulsions. There was no time to knock on Noah's door. There was no time to find a high place or climb a tree. It was instantaneous judgment. And, it didn't just last an hour or two; it continued for months and the whole planet was turned completely inside out by these tremendous acts of God. The problem with people (even believers), is that we fail to understand that with God nothing is impossible. God handling this old planet is like you or me handling a marble or ball bearing. It's that simple in His power - He can do with it whatever He wants. He controls all the forces of nature and outer space, and this was all brought to bear in the early months of what we refer to as Noah's flood. Remember years back, the old front-loading washing machines had a window in the door - and when the machine was started, you could see the suds and the clothing start to roll violently. That's much the way the earth would have looked as Noah's flood started. It was complete turmoil. We have plenty of archaeological proof for this. In fact, if you get into a study of the flood, all around the earth you'll find a soil product called "loess" which comes solely from volcanic action. In every place on this planet there has been laid down, (even on our ocean floors), a tremendous amount of "loess," and the only logical time that this could have been laid down is during the flood, with all its volcanic action. Along with the flood, we also have a disappearance of much of the land surface of the pre-Noah time. We believe that the land surface of the earth from the time of Adam until the flood of Noah's day, was much larger than it is today. Seventy-five percent of the earth's surface is water today. Only a small portion of it is land, and only a small percentage of that land surface is habitable. Most of it is uninhabitable. Up until the time of Noah, the earth was beautiful, tremendously productive with vegetation beyond our imagination, and highly populated. I have a friend who was in the space program back in the 1960's. He and a friend of his calculated how many people could have been here from the time of Adam until Noah (about 1600 years). They had an easy mathematical time approaching four to five billion people. The reason for that (and we've witnessed this in recent years) is once you get to a certain level, population doubles. Once it doubles, it begins to grow exponentially - to just explode. So, we can be confident that at the time of Noah's flood, the earth was highly populated and had tremendous technology. But when the flood came, there was no time to escape. It was complete and instantaneous, and for that reason there is not much evidence of the things before Noah's flood except in fossil records. And the only logical way to view the fossil records, is that they are a direct result of the flood. Scientists are going to scoff at this. Turn to I Timothy 6 in the New Testament. I am an avid supporter of good science. I love science, and I love people who have the intellectual and physical fortitude to go into it. It's an exciting discipline. But we have to be honest, and scientists aren't always honest. In I Timothy 6:20, the Apostle Paul is writing under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit and he says: I Timothy 6:20 "O Timothy, keep that which is committed to thy trust, avoiding profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called:"

Paul is saying, "Timothy, watch out for the false sciences." True science never disagrees with Scripture. True science and Scripture always fit "hand in glove." But, it's these false sciences, the man-made sciences, that cast all the belligerent reflections on the Word of God. They are not true sciences. The reason some sciences are false and not true sciences is that, in them, everything is based on what man thinks. They can actually prove nothing in the laboratory. Compare that to mathematics, which is a true science, because you can never change the makeup of true mathematics. You cannot change the true workings of physics or chemistry, either. But a geologist can come along and say, "Well, we think `such-and-such'," and then the next generation comes along and they are taught that theory as a truth or absolute fact. I've got no argument with theory. If someone wants to come up with a bizarre theory, and he will tell his students in the classroom that it is "strictly theory - we can't prove it," then I don't object to that. I've even told kids in high school classes, "if your teacher makes it plain that what he's teaching is simply some man-made idea, and that it's only `theory', I'm not going to complain." But, educators usually come in and say, "That's the way it was," and I have a problem with that. Public television programs such as "Nova" are very interesting, but gullible people believe everything that's said. You can only determine so much from fossil records. The rest is interpolation and assumption. Here's good example. Go into any basic college geology course and the first thing they throw at their students is a "geologic column," an "evolutionary geologic column" or time scale. They teamed up with evolutionary biologists and have divided the structure of the surface of the earth into various strata which they associate a particular time period with. That time period is dependent on the fossils found in that one strata. If near the bottom they have found a very simple life form, they maintain that that is the oldest rock on the earth, it's the farthest down from the top, and consequently, the very earliest of life forms are found in this layer. Then, as they find in higher strata … say, reptiles, they say, that naturally you'll find them throughout all the earth's structure in this level, and it's the next higher form of life, because its "evolved" from those simplest of life forms into the reptile. The next up from reptiles is, I believe, birds, and so on up that geologic column. All that sounds so believable, because as wind and erosion, etc. pile this material up, naturally the oldest would be at the bottom, and at the top would be the fossils of man. It all sounds so logical. But, what they don't tell people is that nowhere on earth have they ever found these fossils in this clear order. Never! They are all mixed up. Granted, there may be levels of sandstone or rock of some kind, with only primordial forms. But, it's not on the bottom! It may be way up on top! Study the Geological Time Scale Example A on the next page. So, it's a lie, and our kids fall for it. Then they come home and tell their parents that they can no longer believe the Bible because their geology professor has "proved" that evolution is the only thing that makes sense. What the teacher doesn't tell them is that these are only theories - they can't prove it - but, they tout them as truths. Some other verses in the New Testament that we need to look at are in II Peter 3:1-6: II Peter 3:1-6 "This second epistle, beloved, I now write unto you; in both which I stir up your pure minds by way of remembrance: That ye may be mindful of the words which were spoken before by the holy prophets, and of the commandment of us the apostles of the Lord and Saviour: Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers, walking after their own lusts, And saying, `Where is the promise of his coming?' for since the fathers fell asleep, all things continue as they were from the beginning of the creation.

For this they willingly are ignorant of, that by the word of God the heavens were of old, and the earth standing out of the water and in the water: Whereby the world that then was, being overflowed with water, perished:" Verse 2 refers to "words spoken beforehand by the holy prophets" or the Old Testament. Verse 3 says we should "know" or expect that there will be those who will mock and scoff at Biblical truths. And, as we discussed a few chapters ago, these people are "willingly ignorant," as it says in verse 5, they do not want to know any different, they won't listen to anything different than what they are teaching. If you were to speak to a geology professor and point out that the theories he purports as truths have discrepancies because things just aren't consistently as he says on the earth's surface, they are all mixed up in various levels; and that you believe it was Noah's Flood, he'll just laugh at you, because he doesn't want to believe that there was ever a flood. We know from the chronological record, that Noah's flood could not have taken place more than 5000 to 6000 years ago, and that blows their millions and millions of years theories `out of the water'! So, they totally reject Noah's flood. You will never find a current college or university textbook on geology mention Noah's flood; they totally reject and ignore it. This is where we come into the controversy of what is being taught our children. Some states have tried to pass laws that if schools are going to teach evolution, they also have to teach creationism; and the educators reject it, because it makes a fallacy of everything they are trying to teach our kids. What takes more faith? Believing something like evolution that is a figment of somebody's imagination, or believing the true record? I believe it would take a lot more faith to believe the false than it does the true. An oilman, if he were a true geologist, would say … "Wait a minute! In the oil business, we rest on geology." My answer to him would be, "Tell me, would it put oil in any different strata if it were laid down by Noah's flood as opposed to evolution?" No, it wouldn't change anything, the oil would still be in the same places. I've had some geologists in my classes, and they have been able to reconcile this. They will say something like, "If I'm going to believe any of God's Word, then I have to believe all of it. I can reconcile the fact that there is oil and gas in certain places, there are coal deposits in certain places, because of the Scriptural records, and I don't have to go back and say that a geologist says `such-and-such.'" We have to be careful and make our young people aware that science is not always honest. I remember when the U.S. astronauts were making the "moon walk." The same friend I told you about earlier was involved in that project. If you'll remember, before they went to the moon, they had one big fear of landing there - that they would sink into the dust. When they got there and found that that dust was only about twelve inches deep, the whole scientific community was so shocked that they immediately went to work building an instrument that they could place on the moon's surface on the next trip, which would measure how much and how fast this lunar dust was collecting on the moon. They just couldn't believe that there were so few inches of lunar dust on its surface, if the moon was billions of years old. They decided to make a special instrument to measure how much dust was filtering to the moon's surface in a given period of time, and set it up on their next trip. When they went back the next time, they measured it and were aghast that instead of some infinitesimal, immeasurable amount, there was a fraction of an inch of dust, which indicated that the moon couldn't be more than ten thousand years old, at the most! My friend told me that when the scientists got that information, they buried it, so that the public wouldn't find out, and it remained hidden until

just a few years ago, when in the Tulsa World, I saw a little article on the back page that gave that fact. The scientists didn't want the public to know that, because, it simply blew their theories of millions upon millions of years being involved in the evolution of our solar system. So, this brings us back to the false, so-called "sciences." We have to take them with a grain of salt. I remember a few years ago, a fellow showed me an article in one of the prestigious archaeology magazines, in which they were refuting the existence of a little town mentioned in the Old Testament. He asked me about it. I told him to wait just a little while, because one thing about archaeologists, they are honest enough that when they find something in line with the Scriptures, they'll announce it. And sure enough, it wasn't even a year later that that very magazine had to admit that the little town that they had said `never existed,' had been found, according to the Biblical record. Every time they scoff at the Old Testament record, all you have to do is set back and say, "The Bible is the true record. This is the Word of God and God does not lie." The entire scientific community tonight will not recognize Noah's flood, because it totally changed everything so that the history of this planet, instead of going back millions and millions of years, in actuality, goes back to Noah's flood. Even carbon 14 dating cannot be accurate beyond the flood, because it is based on a continuous degeneration under continuous circumstances. Those continuous circumstances were interrupted at Noah's flood. The whole planet was wrapped in volcanic ash and volcanic smoke from the center of the earth; along with that, there was a deluge of the water, that totally changed the face of the planet. If you've ever seen pictures of what a rampaging river flood can do, taking everything in its path, you've got a glimpse of what was taking place on the entire surface of the planet. There was total destruction from pole to pole; and from East to West. No one knew what hit him! In our next chapter, we'll look at some things that archaeologists can't explain. If they'd just give the flood the credit for it, they'd have all their questions answered.  

[iamnormal707]

JOURNAL # 1 [MADNESS AND MYTHS] Erich Fromm

Erich Fromm was a great German social psychologist and had the unique perspective of the idea of sanity directly linking to the creation of homo sapians beginnings. Although his words are dated, his points are certainly not; he believes that as humans evolved and left the unity of nature, they were all meant to go insane but only some were strong enough to keep their sanity. Once leaving the womb of their mother, they are weak, helpless, unlike their primal counterparts.

When baby giraffes are first born they instantly learn how to walk, although still wobbly, they have that direct instinct to walk. When babies are first born, they can't walk, lift their heads, or even open their eyes. In terms of the Joker, Fromm’s theory of narcissism and biographic traumas intersect with immense force. Arthur, the Joker, said “[f]or my whole life I didn’t even know I existed.”

Only when he murdered those boys, got attention from the news, and started a movement, he felt as if he existed; This instance would fit within Fromm’s definitions of ID, Ego, and SuperEgo. What Joker felt towards the end of the movie was his super ego; He felt as if he was some sort of God, the people worshiping him got to his head.

During the first part of the movie, he focused on a combination of Ego and ID. ID being his initial needs; Putting food on the table, taking care of his mom, holding down a job, as well, he made an effort to care for himself mentally. His Ego would be his initial need, but it didn’t necessarily make him happy.

Overall, Both Fromm and Joker correlate within the realm of mad studies.

Although I was not in class that day, just learning about the topics on my own was immensely interesting. Fromm was a tough read, but even when he started referencing a lot of religious texts that I didn’t know about, which I skimmed, I was thoroughly intrigued. I could reflect upon the situation upon myself and step into others shoes. What stood out to me most was his reasoning behind everyone’s insane.

As I mentioned in my summary above, because of this lost unity with nature, we are more aware of our loneliness and helplessness; we consider ourselves individuals and not a part of something; an example used in the text being nature. We are meant to go insane without that unity; there’s only those lucky few that are able to keep their sanity. I feel as if I can go into a spiral just reading into this topic, the studies of madness, nature, and nurture, are all fascinating. As for the Joker, the first time I watched the movie, back when it was released, I didn’t quite understand it. But now, with a lens this class provided me, I was able to understand more in depth. I relate to him in some sense and could feel empathy towards him. He grew up in an environment that was against him, an environment that he didn’t have the power to change. He poses the statement, if a rich person dies, his death would be known. If he would die on the streets, his death would be disregarded. Just in this line, a great weight of questions of politics, the economics of the world is put on the consumer. Our world is not equal, if the world was equal nothing about the goodness or badness of society would change.

Masterlist

[primofate]

What I would say to Genshin male characters isekai’d to our world. [crackfic for fun]

Note: Bit of Filipino reference in Thoma’s

To Aether:

“Yes some people do believe in different Gods here... No, I don’t think I can take you to meet any of them,”

“What do you mean you don’t have a Paimon in this world? I’m right here? I’ll go wherever you go?”

To Albedo:

“I don’t have any painting materials... Oh here, use my tablet instead,”

“I do have a little sister... No. No bombs,”

“Come, I’ll show you what a REAL elevator is,”

To Bennett:

“If someone asks you to go to the casino just say no,” 

“That’s not a slime, that’s a jellyfish, I wouldn’t touch that if I were yo--oh woop, okay, too late,”

To Chongyun:

“Oh you’re gunna LOVE Halloween,”

"So would your exorcism work on the toxic people in my life?”

“I can definitely feel an evil presence nearby.” *Points at piled up assignments*

To Dainsleif:

“...There’s this game called Fire Emblem Three Houses...”

To Diluc:

“No you can’t walk around at night with your claymore,”

“No that falcon is not gunna respond to you,”

“I'm asking for a friend, but what are you looking for in a wife? "

To Gorou:

“Can you please ask my dog what he thinks of me?”

“Please don’t hate me if I call you ‘good boy’,”

"Her Excellency...? Oh, it's me. Yeah. I'm the excellency around here. I lead a war against this evil archon called Math,"

To Itto:

“Dude I told you not to write on the advertisement boards, that’s not how it works around here,”

“Believe me I don’t mind what you’re wearing right now but we should probably get you some new clothes,”

“So we were all just minding our own business and then BAM you came along,” 

To Kaeya:

“I just really want to touch that fluffy thing around you,”

“You interested in getting box hair dyes? Oh you know, perhaps red?”

“...Do you know how to play strip poker? Well I’m not THAT interested in your clothes. Let’s start with the eyepatch,”

“...Why is there 62 selfies of you in my phone...”

To Kazuha:

*drops heaps of paper on the floor, now it’s everywhere* “...Have you ever thought that your elemental skill might have other uses?”

"There, that’s the only pirate ship I know of,” *points at pirate ship ride in theme park*

To Razor:

“I’m adopting you,”

To Scaramouche

“..................Will you do the Fandango?”

“Do you know the expression ‘step on me’?”

To Tartaglia

“This is the cleaning spray we use,” *picks up bottle of Ajax*

“Got you a gift, you’re gunna love these!” *gives baby training chopsticks

"Greatest toy salesman? You’ve lost to a giraffe,” *shows Toys R Us mascot*

"I forgot to teach you how to clear search history. I think you have to learn it given the amount of Childe x Zhongli fanfiction you’ve clicked on,”

To Thoma

“My days of ordering takeaway are over,”

“Thoma can you hold this stick thing. Okay, now can you try saying ‘TAHHOOOOOOO’”

“That’s an air fryer, yes it’s a magical thing,”

To Venti

“You’ve only been here a week... Where did you get that fake ID?”

“That’s not Dvalin, that’s an airplane... I mean, same difference though,”

“You want some music...? Here let me introduce you to youtube,”

To Xiao

*Opens fridge* “...Who bought 12 cartons of almond milk?”

”You can feel an immense amount of karmic debt? Don’t worry that’s just my normal stress levels,”

To Xingqiu

“No I don’t really read a lot of books... Oh, that pile...? You know, I just... buy them and then...they collect dust. That’s how books work in this world,”

To Zhongli

“Don’t look at me I’m a lot more broke than you are,”

“Make that rock pillar thingie. Wanna climb on it and experience being tall for once,”

“Hold this slipper. ‘Kay now throw it at my lazy brother and say “I will have order,”

Not tagging anyone!

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[ikleesfiction]

Miss Americana

Fandom : Crossover Hawaii Five-0 x Chicago PD TV Word count : 5,610 words Pairing : Steve McGarrett x Danny Williams; Jay Halstead x reader

Summary :  You met Williams-McGarrett family in Los Angeles and they introduced you to Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Your boyfriend, Jay Halstead, doesn't know anything about this. Yet.

Author's note :

This is the fourth one shot of "Will you follow through if I fall for you" fic continuation. It would be better if you read it first. But if you don't, here's the quick summary.

This happened after I listened to a few podcasts (1  🞂  2  🞂 3) of Scott Caan and Alex O'Loughlin, passionately talking about Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. 

This fic does not comply to the canon of Hawaii Five-0 or Chicago PD. So if you don't follow one of the other, it should not be a hindrance, I think. Here's hoping that I'm right.

Disclaimer

◢◤

"Would you like another cup of coffee?

You look up from the book in your hand to the waiter addressing you.

"Oh, I would love to. But it's already my fourth cup of the day," You grimace at him. "Maybe I'll take a bottle of water, please? Cold, if you have one."

The waiter grins at you, "Sure thing," then leave with your empty cup of coffee.

You are supposed to meet your friend, Tim, at his house on The Bird Streets to work on a song. However, he got a sudden appointment and asked you to wait for his call to reschedule. So here you are, sitting at a Cafe/Bistro somewhere in Los Angeles, drinking too much coffee.

You check your watch and your phone. It's almost lunchtime, but your phone is still showing nothing. Alright then, you thought to yourself, back to the book. Your eyes immediately find the last paragraph you read on Astrophysics for People in a Hurry.

Five pages later, the waiter puts a bottle of water on your table, "Here it is. You sure you don't want another cup of coffee?" He jokes with you.

You laugh in response, "No, really, thank you."

The waiter leaves with a smile and turns to the table across from yours. That's when you notice somebody's sitting there.

"Good afternoon. Only for two?" The waiter lays two menu cards on the table.

"Four. My husband and daughter are parking the car." The man answers him with a smile. He has a little boy sitting next to him. His son, you guess, since both of them have blond hair. Their noses look similar too.

"Danno, can I have ice cream for lunch?" The boy begs his father, pointing at one of the delightful pictures on the card.

"Hmm, maybe." The father hums his reply. He exchanges a knowing glance with the waiter.

"Do you want anything to drink while you're waiting?"

"Soda!" The boy yells from his chair, who laughs at his father's glare.

"How about two glasses of orange juice?" The father checks to his son before confirming it with the waitress.

"Okay, be right back with your drinks."

After the waiter leaves, the boy begins to prattle about everything to his father. About giraffes at the zoo ("They are so tall like Dad!"), about his favorite ice cream flavors ("Cookie Dough. But I like Kame's shave ice better, Danno"), about swimming at Venice Beach ("There's a lot of people there, Danno. I like our beach more")

The boy doesn't even look like he needs to breathe. You can't help but let out a chuckle. His father looks up at you and shares a grin. "That's great, Charlie," He comments to his son.

You let their conversation become a white noise while you read your book.

At your periphery, you see someone passes by. However, you don't expect a hand to suddenly sneak your phone from the table. Your hand instantly grabs that wrist, trying to stop it from stealing your phone. But the thief forcefully pulls his hand out of your reach and moves away.

Unfortunately for the thief, he runs straight to the father at your neighboring table. The man has no problem flipping the thief over and pushes him to their table. When the thief squirms away from his clutch, the man lifts the thief's elbow high up and turns it behind his back in a very painful lock. The unpleasant sound coming out of the thief's mouth proves how excruciating it is.

The man's eyes wander. Many shocked faces are staring at him, including yours. "It's okay, I'm a cop," He explains.

In contrast to the crowd, the boy looks at his father in awe, gleefully clapping his hands.

"Charlie, why are you clapping? You're not supposed to clap at this. Oh my god, you are just like your father! Happy to see any aggression," The man rants as he takes out a cable tie from his trousers' pocket. You don't even know why he got cable ties in his pocket. He efficiently ties the perp's hands behind his back and forces him to sit.

Only then, the man addresses the crowd again, "Has anyone called 9-1-1?"

"I did. The police are on the way," One of the cafe's staff squeaks from the door, with a phone still in her hand.

"Excellent! Did you hear that? Your ride would be here soon," The man tightly squeezes the thief's shoulders. The thief could only reply with an agonized grunt.

Everybody else resumes their activities with a sporadic look to their table.

The boy picks up the stolen phone from the floor. It fell near his foot during the short scuffle. "Danno," He hands your phone over to his father.

"Ah, thanks, Charlie," The man ruffles the kid's hair and kisses the top of his head.

"I believe this is yours?" The man returns the phone to you. "Hope it's still working?" He cringes at the spiderweb marks on the phone screen.

"Thanks. Probably not. But it's alright." You smile at the man and offer to shake his hand, "Y/N Y/LN, thanks again for helping me,"

The man takes your hand, "Hey, no big deal. Danny Williams. And this is my son, Charlie," Danny brings Charlie in front of him. You extend your hand to Charlie as well.

All of a sudden, you hear voices yelling from behind you. "Danno! Charlie!"

You look back to see a tall, dark, imposing man and a beautiful teenage girl rushing in your direction. Charlie shouts back at them, "Daddy! Gracie!"

So you guess they must be Danny's husband and daughter.

This new man drops down to Charlie's level and checks on him, trying to see if he's injured. "Are you okay? Charlie?"

"Dad! Dad! Danno was soooo cool! He pushing and then flipping and then that man went aaargh!" Charlie re-tells the scene to his father, holding his elbow behind his back to show him.

Couldn't really understand his son's story, the man asks his husband to elaborate, "Danny, what's happening here? Why are you arresting this man?"

"I'm not arresting anybody, Steve. We don't have jurisdiction to make an arrest, you know? Since we are in LA, not Hawaii? I'm just holding this man until LAPD shows up," Danny clarifies to his husband, Steve.

"But why?" Steve is still confused.

"This guy here, what's your name?" Danny barks at the thief. But his mouth stays glued. "Really? Would you prefer my ex-SEAL here asking you the question?" Danny gestures in Steve's direction.

Steve stands tall. His hands are folded in front of his chest. His biceps bulge in his tight t-shirt. The thief's face turns green, looking fearful. Steve's scowl was probably not helping either.

"Danny?? What's going on here?" Steve begins to lose his patience.

"What?? It's no big deal, babe!" Danny yells back at Steve. "This guy here tried to nick this woman's phone. I'm just helping her," Danny motions in your direction.

"Y/N, here's my husband, Steve McGarrett, and our daughter, Grace," Danny continues to introduce you to his family. You shake their hands and exchanging simple pleasantries.

"As I said, I just helped Y/N to get her phone back. Now we are waiting for LAPD," Danny ends his explanation.

Shortly a police car comes, and two officers quickly take their statements. Initially, the police officers are bemused to find the thief already sat with his hands tied behind his back. After Danny explains that he is a Detective from Honolulu PD and how he prevented the attempted theft, the police officers understand the situation. They ask if you'd like to press charges on Tom Norris, that's the thief's name according to his ID. Considering you're not hurt, you decline on pressing charges. The police are gone with the thief sooner than you expected.

"Can I treat you lunch for your trouble? Shoot! A super late lunch?" You corrected after checking your watch.

"Hey, don't worry, it's no trouble at all," Danny says to you with a big smile.

"No, no, seriously. You guys were on holiday, I guess. But still bothered to help me. Lunch is the least I can do."

Before long, they arrange to get a table for five and talk a lot during the meal.

◢◤

"So you guys are from Hawaii? That's nice!" You tell the family.

"See, Danno? That's what you're supposed to say about Hawaii. You're the only one who describes Hawaii as a pineapple-infested hell hole," laments Steve to his husband.

"I'm just telling the truth, babe. How about you, Y/N? Where are you from?" Danny tries to find out.

"Originally from The Netherlands, Amsterdam. But I moved to Chicago last year," You reply.

"Now that, Steve, is a city that would appreciate seasonal changes," Danny nods his approval of Chicago.

"Only you, Danno, who whines about constant sunshine." Steve grumbles.

Grace and Charlie don't react much to their parents' bickering. Too used to their silliness. But you still find it quite funny.

"So you guys are here for vacation?" You ask the family.

"Kind of. We are on holiday. Also, we are visiting the colleges here for Grace, who will graduate high school next year," Steve throws his right arm around Grace's shoulder.

"Yes, we are on an excursion to prove to Grace that LA universities are not better than the University of Hawaii," Danny quips from Steve's left.

Grace whines at his father, "Danno..."

"Danny here doesn't want his children to be far away from him," Steve enlightens you. "But I think going to school in LA would be better than The Netherlands. Wouldn't it, babe?" Steve winks at Grace.

"Do not joke about that, Steven!" Danny elbows his husband hard.

Grace looks thoughtful for a moment, "Y/N, did you go to college in the Netherlands? What do you think my chance to study there?"

"Gracie, can I come with you to This Otherlands?" Charlie innocently chirps to his sister.

Steve is laughing so loud, even after Danny punches his arm.

"What about you, Y/N? What are you doing in LA? Are you on vacation too?" Danny questions you after the laughter receded.

"I'm here for work. Most of the time, I'd do it remotely from Chicago. But sometimes I have to make the trip here or to Amsterdam," You tell them.

"What do you do?"

"I'm a music producer," You give a simple answer.

"What instruments do you play?" Steve is curious. "Guitar?"

"Mostly piano and synthesizer. I do play guitar, but I'm just an okay guitar player. I wish I could play better,"

"Dad plays guitar too!" Charlie happily declares as he points at Steve.

You cheer at Charlie's enthusiasm, "Does he? That's great!"

"Yeah, he plays very well. Maybe Dad can teach you to play better," Charlie directs you.

"Oh, yes, that would be awesome," You wholeheartedly agree with Charlie, as the rest of the table laughing at the idea of Steve teaches music.

◢◤

"Danny, I was wondering if you could explain something to me," You turn to the man.

"Shoot," Danny nods as he puts down his juice glass.

"The arm lock that you did to the thief. Where did you learn that? Did Steve teach you that?" You ask him, genuinely want to know.

"Well, even though Steve here was the Navy SEAL," Danny glares at his husband, who replies with a smirk, "I have been working as a cop for more than 20 years now. I know some moves too,"

"But that's not a cop's move," You contradict him.

"How do you know any cop's moves?" Danny confronts you back.

"My boyfriend is a cop in Chicago," You give Danny a sheepish smile.

"Ah, I see. Did your boyfriend teach you self-defense?"

"He did. I'm nowhere near good as Jay. But it's a start," You answer Danny.

"Of course. If he's not good at it, then he's not a good cop," Danny comments without sounding too arrogant.

"Jay also taught me about guns. Personally, I don't like it, but he needs me to know about it, especially gun safety. So..." You shrug.

Danny nods his understanding, "Yeah. Be glad that he doesn't bring home grenades or other explosives," Danny gives Steve a stink eye. "Unlike some Super!SEAL here,"

Steve is immune to that look. It doesn't seem to affect him anymore.

You smile at their interaction, "Jay was an Army Ranger. After he came back, he went to Police Academy,"

"Really?" Steve looks interested.

"Oh, here we go," Danny sighs at his husband.

Steve grins but decides not to comment on it any further. He goes praising Danny instead.

"But Danny is being too modest here. He is a great fighter. Sometimes he's even better than me. Which lots of people find it surprising, considering I was a SEAL,"

"and don't you forget it, babe," Danny smirks at Steve, who returns it with a chaste kiss.

You sigh internally. Looking at the lovely couple made you miss your boyfriend, Jay.

"In all seriousness," Danny begins, "I practiced Jiu-Jitsu since high school. That's where the moves come from," He pauses to sip on his drink.

"I got my Blue Belt when I entered The Police Academy. For me, I think, I learned how to fight better in Jiu-Jitsu than what they taught us there," Danny continues.

"Do you also teach it to Grace and Charlie?" You ask the parents.

"Yeah. Danny taught them both as early as possible. Grace already got her Yellow Belt when we first met. Now she is working for her Purple Belt," Steve brags. Danny also looks so proud. Grace, though, tries so hard not to roll her eyes at her parents.

"Me too! I will get my Yellow Belt soon! Right, Danno?" Charlie exclaims.

"Of course you are kiddo. After that, you surely can beat your Dad here," Danny ruffles Charlie's hair. Steve offers his palm for a high five, but Charlie punches it instead. He giggles when Steve is faking to be hurt by Charlie's tiny fist.

"Do you think I could learn it too?" You inquire to Danny.

Danny and Steve look at each other. You're waiting for their answer, hoping that they will agree.

Before they decide anything, Grace interrupts, "We can go check out the place that Sensei Egan told us, Danno."

"Yeah, that's a great idea," Steve agrees to his daughter's suggestion. "We can check that dojo for Grace, meeting the instructor. Maybe could show some moves too for y/n,"

"Okay then. Grace, share the dojo address with y/n. We can meet you there tomorrow morning, what do you say, y/n?" Danny asks you.

You're supposed to fly back to Chicago next afternoon, but what the hell, you are very interested in this offer. "Yes, sure. If you don't mind me crashing your holiday plan again?"

"No, not at all. We need to check out that place anyway." Steve waves off your worry.

Grace passes her phone to you. "You can puy your number there. I will forward you the address,"

You tap your number to Grace's phone before groaning when you remember that your phone is dead. "Could you e-mail me instead? I don't think I could replace my phone soon,"

Danny doesn't even try to hold his laugh at your poor luck.

◢◤

The next day, you take an Uber to the gym. No, it's The Dojo. You correct yourself. When you step in, Charlie is shouting at you from across the room. "Y/N!" Standing next to his sister, Charlie crazily waves at you, worried that you could not see him.

You remove your shoes, placed them accordingly at the remarked spot. Walking towards Charlie and Grace, you see the Williams-McGarrett clan wear similar outfits with other people in The Dojo. The only differences between them are their belts. Danny wears a Black Belt with a red stripe, while Steve wears a Brown Belt. Grace has Blue Belt, and Charlie has a White one. Knowing that you will do some workout, you wear a black t-shirt and training pants. Definitely a contrast in a room full of jiu-jitsu outfits.

Danny and Steve are talking to a guy on the other side of the room. This guy has a Black Belt with more stripes than Danny's, indicating that he is the instructor here.

"Hey, guys. Good morning," You greet Grace and Charlie. They reply with a big smile.

"Just out of interest, do you guys always bring your uniform on your holiday?" You gesture to Grace's clothes.

Grace laughs at your question, "It is called Gi. Yes, we are always bringing them along on holiday," She laughs again at your shocked face. "No, I'm joking. It's because we know we will visit this dojo, so we have our Gi with us,"

Soon Danny and Steve come over to your side. "Hi, y/n. So I talked to Sensei Marcus there," Danny gestures to the guy he spoke to. "We are going to follow their training for today. You can watch from the side if you're not sure you want to do it. The first hour would be the class for Kids and Teens,"

You see Grace and Charlie lining up in the center of the room with other children. They seem to be divided by belts instead of age.

"The next hour would be the adult class," Danny pauses for a moment. "If you want my suggestion, I encourage you to join the Teens class. I hope you don't feel insulted by that."

You chuckle at his words, "Not at all. I understand,"

"If it's too much, don't hesitate to stop and move aside. Everyone will understand," Steve adds.

You exhale softly, readying yourself, "Okay," before joining the line.

The first fifteen minutes, they start with stretching. So far, you have no problems with it. You practice Yoga for the last few years. You know how to stretch.

The next one, they teach you how to fall correctly. Which turns out to be a hard thing to do. At first, an instructor's assistant helps you. After a few moments, she moves away to help others. But you're still not doing it right. So Danny pulls you aside and teaches you privately for the rest of the hour.

You fall so many times until it tired you out. You cannot even get up from the mat. Your shoulders would have been bruised with so many times you landed incorrectly.

"Still interested to learn this?" Danny grabs your hand to help you get up.

Even though the lesson exhausts you, you feel great. You learn a lot, even from doing the same thing over and over again. "Hell yeah!" You grin at Danny.

"Crazy woman!" Danny pats your shoulders. Right where it hurts the most. You can't help but flinch away.

"Hurt, wasn't it? Why don't you go sit down on the outside of the mat with Charlie?"

Charlie sits on one side of the mat, a bottle of water in his hand. He is watching Grace, who has her hands on Steve's Gi, trying to throw Steve down.

Danny silently pays attention to his husband and daughter on the mat. But you can see his hands slightly move as if he's the one sparring.

Shortly, Grace has a chance to push Steve. Steve lost his balance for a moment before countering her attack. Grace would've fallen down hard if Steve didn't hanging to Grace's Gi so tight to slow her fall.

"That's great, Grace," Steve says to his daughter as he helps her up. They bow to each other to end the spar. Danny is clapping from outside the mat, "Good job, Monkey,"

Of course, you and Charlie follow Danny's example to cheer for Grace.

You still sit on the side of the mat, now also accompanied by Grace. You watch the next class practice, where Danny and Steve spar with other students for about an hour.

After the class is done, Steve taps on Danny's shoulder, "Danny, could you help me with this move?" He nods in the direction of the mat.

Danny responds with rolling eyes at his husband's antics.

Grace runs commentary in the background, "Dad didn't actually need help from Danno. However, you're not allowed to ask a higher belt to spar with. It's a sign of disrespect. But Dad and Danno often work differently between each other,"

You see Danny and Steve taking place at a ready position. It takes time before anybody falls, or one locks each other. They move fluidly. When one throws the other, they quickly bring them down along then keep them in a lock. The locks are soon countered, and they back up again. The great thing is they look like they enjoy sparring with each other. They share a laugh whenever someone throws the other or someone holds the other in a lock. You find that very interesting.

The sparring ends when Danny makes a grappling move that Steve cannot counter, so he has to tap out.

After the sparring, Steve sits back with you and his kids while Danny goes over to Sensei Marcus. Steve asks your opinion about Jiu-Jitsu, whether you're still interested to learn it.

"Very much, yeah. The first thing I will do once I'm back in Chicago is to find a Dojo," You excitedly tell Steve.

"Well, lucky for you, Sensei Marcus here knows a lot of Jiu-Jitsu instructors," All of a sudden, Danny joins your conversation. Sensei Marcus stands beside him.

"Sure, if you want to keep learning Jiu-Jitsu, I will give you some references of my fellows in Chicago," Marcus informs you.

"That would be awesome!"

Marcus shakes your hand, "Good luck!" and moves to shake hands with the rest of the Williams-McGarrett family. "Thanks for visiting our dojo. Please come again whenever you're in LA,"

They all look tired, but their smiles beam as bright as Hawaiian sunshine.

◢◤

Two weeks later, in Chicago,

You see your boyfriend's truck parked in front of your house as you walk home from the bus stop. You walk much slower than you used to. Your body is hurting all over the place, but you feel elated.

The day after you came home from Los Angeles, Jay was caught in a hard case. He had to fly out to New York and liaised with NYPD SVU to solve it.

You missed him a lot, for sure. Jay called you whenever he could for these past two weeks. Texted you every day too. But you have not got the chance to tell Jay about your new interest in Jiu-Jitsu.

After your last trip to LA, you promptly checked out the Dojo that Sensei Marcus referred to you. You were thrilled to find out that it's only fifteen minutes bus ride from your house.

You met with one of the instructors there and asked for a private class. Because that's what Danny advised you to do. "After you have a better understanding of the lessons, then I want you to go train with other people at the dojo. But for the first five or six months, you might've been better with one-on-one lessons,"

The instructor, Professor Louisa, is delighted to provide. You work on a schedule three to four times a week. The professor initially suggested only two meets in a week. But considering your occasional trip abroad for work, you prefer to do more lessons when you're in town.

This is the third week you've been learning jiu-jitsu in Chicago. Scraps and bruises are inevitable. Jay would freak out if he saw them before you could explain to him.

Jay's flight back from New York landed about two hours ago. He must've been coming directly to your place from the O'Hare. The house smells amazing when you enter the room. Following your nose leads you to the kitchen. You find your boyfriend pulling out what seems to be garlic bread from the oven, "Hey, babe. You're back!"

"Hey, you! Perfect timing!" Jay secures the tray aside before stepping closer to you. He puts one hand on your waist, the other one on your back. Moving even closer to kiss you.

His passion makes you forget your bruises for a moment. When Jay pushes you playfully, your shoulder hits the nearest wall. You instantly cry out in pain. "Argh!"

"What's wrong?" Jay stops everything he's doing to you right away.

"Nothing, I just got some bruises," You rub the pain from your shoulder.

"How come?" Jay begins to take off your t-shirt to check on the bruises, but you move away from his grasp.

"Hold on. Let me take a shower. I must've been rank from sweat. Then I'll tell you everything," You kiss Jay one more time before going to the bedroom.

As you eat the pasta primavera that Jay made, you ask him about his case in New York, "How was it?"

"It's done. We did what we have to do,"

Not interested in talking about his case, Jay interrogates you instead, "So, where did you get the bruise? I swear, I only left the city for two weeks, and you're already in trouble," Jay shakes his head.

"I'm not! I just joined this gym. Dojo, I meant. I'm taking Jiu-Jitsu lessons!" You cheerfully tell Jay.

"You what?" Jay pauses from drinking his wine.

So you told Jay the whole story. About how someone tried to snatch your phone when you're in LA. How you met the Williams-McGarrett family from Hawaii. How they got you into jiu-jitsu.

"It's so fun, Jay. Yeah, sure, I got bruises and scraps. But whenever I got stuck with my work, I go have a practice at the dojo, and then I come home feeling energized," You confess to your boyfriend.

"Really?" Jay looks at you, disbelieving.

"Uhuh," You nod as you swallow your spaghetti. "You know what, you should come and see the dojo. It might interest you too,"

"I know about martial arts, babe. I taught you how to punch, remember?" Jay reminds you.

"Yes, you did," You say in giggles, "Professor Louisa said she won't teach me how to punch,"

"Of course, Jiu-jitsu has a different approach than other martial art, say karate. Or boxing," Jay puts down his fork on the empty plate. "You sure you enjoy it?"

You hold Jay's hand and look into his eyes, "I am. This is something I want to do seriously, Jay. I admit part of it comes from you and your job. Like you always said, I need to be able to defend myself. Because you think I could get drag into your case one day,"

Jay puts his other hand on top of yours, looking somehow regretful, "Babe..."

"No, no. But I also do this for myself. Even though my body hurts, I feel great about myself. I feel more confident. It's really inspiring,"

Jay brings your hand to his lips, "Okay then, as long as you're happy with it. But I'm still going to take you to the gun range,"

You roll your eyes in response, "Of course, you will,"

◢◤

A week later, Jay walks up to The Dojo on the second floor. Someone greets him at the entrance, "Hey, man. Can I help you?"

"I suppose to pick up my girlfriend. She is training with..." Jay tries to remember the instructor's name. "Louisa?"

"Ah, yes, Professor Louisa. You must be y/n's boyfriend. I'm Professor Andy, the head of this dojo," The man offers his hand.

"Jay Halstead," Jay shakes Andy's hand.

"I think she will finish in ten minutes. You wanna see her practice?"

"Sure. If it would not be disturbing?" Jay hesitates.

"Not at all. Y/n is the only one in there right now," Andy directs Jay inside the dojo. He asks Jay to remove his shoes before stepping into the room.

Jay watches his girlfriend silently. He winces a couple times when you fall down. But he is amazed to see you immediately stand up again.

"She's resilient, your woman is,"

Jay chuckles at Andy's remark, "Yes, she is,"

Shortly after you bow to your instructor, you see Jay standing on the side with Professor Andy.

You walk towards them with a smile, "I see you met my boyfriend, Prof,"

"I did, yeah," Andy nods. "I don't think Jay would be interested in jiu-jitsu, though," He comments.

"Correction, I'm not interested to see you got thrown down repeatedly," Jay points out.

"Hey!" You hit Jay's arms as both Professors laugh at you.

"But that's how we are supposed to learn. If you don't know how to fall, you won't get back up again," Louisa says serenely.

Andy hums his agreement before ushering you out. "Alright, get out of here, you lovebird,"

When you're in the locker room, changing your Gi, Jay approaches Andy again. But before Jay could say anything, Andy hands a leaflet to him.

"Y/N told me you're a police officer. You might be interested in these classes,"

Jay takes it with a laugh, "Thanks, man. I'll check it out," He puts the leaflet on his jacket pocket and pulls out his card.

"If anything happens when Y/N is here. Or if you need anything I can help with, please give me a call," Jay sounds solemn.

Andy takes the card, "Don't worry, man. We take good care of our students here,"

"I know," Jay nods.

Soon you come out with a gym bag on your shoulder. "See you next week, Prof!"

Andy waves to the couple, "Bye, y/n. See you again, Jay!"

◢◤

Two years later,

You step out of the record store in Pilsen empty-handed, failing to find the vinyl you're looking for. You start walking west to the bus stop when you hear a commotion ahead.

You see a guy pushing people out of his way. He keeps looking behind his back like he's running from something.

"Police! Get out of the way!" You hear other voices shouting.

So this guy seems to be running from the police, you thought to yourself.

The man tries to shove you aside, but your reflex is much better. Your hands instantly grab the front of his shirt. When he tries to push you away, your right foot finds his inner left calf and sweeps him down.

When he tries to move away from your grasp, you lean down and grip his right wrist tightly with your right hand. You put your right elbow beside his right ear while your left elbow is placed underneath his elbow. Your left-hand moves to hold your right wrist from below his right hand. His arm is essentially locked when your left bicep snugs against his right tricep. You raise your elbow slightly from the surface. The more he wiggles his way out, the higher you raise his elbow from the surface, the more painful the lock is.

You hear an impressed whistle from above. When you look up, you find Jay and Hailey standing in front of you. Jay gets a huge grin on his face while Hailey is sporting a shocked look.

"Nice takedown, babe," Jay compliments you.

"Thanks. You might wanna take over from here, though," You say to your boyfriend as you hear few more steps rushing towards you.

You loosen the lock after you are sure Jay gets his hand on the perp. He grabs the suspect up from the floor and pushes him towards the wall.

You find a hand extends in front of your face, offering to help you stand up. You look up to see it was Hailey. You take her hand with a soft thanks.

Once you're back on your feet, you look around to see the other members of the Intelligence Unit staring at you. Adam, Kim, and Kevin are mirroring Hailey's initial look of surprise. Jay's boss, Hank Voight, looks impassive as always. But you catch an amused twitch at one corner of his lips.

"Man, at least give me time to feel my hand again! That bitch could break my arm, you know!" you hear the perp complaining when Jay prepares to cuff him.

Without saying anything in response, Jay folds the perp's wrist inside. The perp yells even louder because of the wristlock.

Kevin moves to take the man away from Jay before any further damage could happen. He ushers the perp right away to a nearby cop car.

Jay turns to check on his girlfriend, "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good." You nod back at him.

"I didn't know you could do that, Y/N," Hailey tells you. "You never tell me that your girlfriend practiced any martial arts," She continues to slap Jay's shoulder.

You answer with a sheepish smile, "It's kinda new,"

"Blue Belt in Jiu-Jitsu is not "kinda new" babe," Jay elbows you playfully.

The team boss pats your shoulder once before walking back to his car, "Good job, Y/LN,"

Kim, who's partnered up with Voight today, quickly follows. But not before inviting you for drinks, "You have to tell me all about this over drinks!"

"See? Even Voight agrees. We'll make a cop-out of you soon, Y/N," Adam offers his fistbump to you.

You meet his with your fistbump but shake your head, laughing, "Not in a million years, Ruzek,"

He only replies with his laugh and walks towards Kevin and the perp.

Jay puts his arm around your shoulders with a huge smile, "C'mon, Kev and Ruz can take care of the perp for a while. Hailey and I will drop you home."

[daringyounggrayson]

misplaced guilt

(Read below or on AO3)

It’s been a while since Bruce has been to one of these galas, and for once, he is neither hosting nor making a speech. It’s a nice change, to say the least.

Dick is sitting next to him, kicking his legs under the table. Bruce would tell him to stop, but at least he’s actually using the chair as intended with both feet closer to the floor than the chair, so Bruce lets it go for the moment. If it gets too out of control, he can always reach out and stop him, but for now, he’ll let the kid release some pent-up energy.

Bruce keeps half of his attention on Dick and the other half on his conversation with Jasmine Owen, a woman who works at one of Gotham’s youth centers. Bruce knew from the second she introduced herself that she came over in hopes of getting a donation, but he doesn’t mind; that’s one of the main purposes of these things, and Bruce is happy to help however he can.

“Babs,” Dick gasps excitedly, shooting upright when he catches Barbara walk into the room, Commissioner Gordon by her side. Bruce looks over at Dick, quirking an eyebrow. Dick smiles back, asks in his I’m-in-public-so-I’m-behaving-like-an-angel voice, “May I please be excused?”

“Hnn,” Bruce says, pretending to think over his answer.

“Bruce,” Dick whines.

Bruce smiles. “Alright. But stay in the ballroom. Dinner is going to be served soon.”

“Okay, thanks!” he slides out of his chair and offers a wave. “Nice meeting you, Ms. Owen.”

“And you, Richard,” she smiles back. When he’s gone, she turns to Bruce again and says, “He’s a sweet kid.”

Bruce can’t help but think at least in public, and at least to people who aren’t me. He’s half-joking, but there’s some truth to the statement: Dick has always seemed to behave better for Alfred, and he’s nothing if not an angel around strangers, even when he’s mad at Bruce.

At home, it’s not that Dick isn’t a good kid—he is—but he’s still a kid. Dick can be sassy, and he has a taste for anything that will make Bruce’s hair turn gray (usually dangerous, usually far away from the ground). He also has no qualms about making fun of Bruce when Dick feels it’s called for. Then there are the arguments, the borderline tantrums. Both have been decreasing in frequency, and Bruce attributes most of them to processing and coming to terms with his parents’ murder, but they are—difficult, to say the least. Dick will have these rough days—sometimes rough weeks—where he’ll lash out at Bruce over the smallest things. Sometimes it seems like he yells at Bruce just to put his hurt somewhere.

Bruce tries to take all of it—from the jokes at his expense that even he has to admit are funny, to the meltdowns—as a good sign, one that says Dick feels secure and knows that Bruce will love him regardless of his behavior or attitude. But there are certainly days when Bruce thinks it would be nice if Dick would listen to him like he listens to Alfred—like when Bruce tells him to get off of the unstable shed roof, for example.  

Despite the challenges that come with raising a child, there are also so many blessings. There’s no other word to describe it. Seeing Dick learn and grow and thrive is something Bruce will never get tired of. On top of that, Dick is just this brilliant, funny, and kind child. He has the biggest heart Bruce has ever seen, and he cares so deeply and widely. Bruce doesn’t know how he got so lucky. Dick is Bruce’s light, his whole world.

Bruce pulls himself out of his head, says, “He’s the best thing that has ever happened to me.” It’s something he can say with complete honesty. “Do you have kids?”

“Oh god, no. I think I’m still a little young for that,” she laughs. Then, thinking about what she said, her face falls. “Not that you were too young, just for me, I’d rather—”

“No, no, it’s fine.” He puts his hands up and smiles. “I was really young when I took Dick in. I go to parent-teacher conferences, and most of the other parents are at least ten years older than me. But I like to think I’m doing alright, and Dick’s happy, so that’s all that matters.”

“Yes, I suppose.” She smiles, but looks down at the table.

“So, what’s it like day-to-day at the youth center?”

She looks up, coming alive again, and the conversation picks back up.

oOo

After dinner, Dick and Barbara disappear again, and Bruce is left alone to mingle. Most people come to him, but he only has to escape a few times, so it’s going about as good as these things can go.

That is until a very urgent Barbara runs into him and tugs on his arm. “Sorry everyone, but I need to borrow Brucie for a second.”

Bruce ducks down to look Barbara in the eye. “What is it?”

“Dick. Just come with me.”

He follows her without another word to the group of people he was talking to. She leads him into the hall and toward the lobby. When they turn the corner, Dick is on the ground in a lateral recumbent position. Gordon is talking to him gently, though Dick seems unresponsive.

“Dick.” Bruce lurches forward, falling to his knees and reaching out to find Dick’s pulse and check his breathing. “What happened?”

“Barbara thinks he had a seizure,” Gordon answers. “An ambulance will be here soon.”

Dick’s breath hitches and he lets out a low moan that feels like a twisting dagger in Bruce’s chest. His eyes find Bruce’s, and he unwraps one hand from his stomach to reach for Bruce’s. Bruce takes it, squeezing it gently in a reassuring manner.

“I’m right here,” Bruce promises, running a hand through Dick’s hair.

“It hurts,” Dick gasps.

“Shh, the paramedics are going to be here soon. We’ll fix it.”

Dick shakes his head and squeezes his eyes shut. “I don’t feel right.”

Bruce tightens his grip slightly, hoping to keep Dick conscious. “What’s wrong? Where does it hurt?”

“Head, stomach,” Dick mumbles. “Feel hot, an’ dizzy.”

Bruce frowns, trying to determine what could be causing Dick’s symptoms. Is this the beginning of an illness, or a seizure disorder? Has Dick been poisoned? There was a run-in with Scarecrow a few nights ago, and Dick had needed to take an untested antidote for the fear toxin. Could this be a delayed reaction to the concoction Bruce had come up with?

Dick’s grip loosens.

“Dick?” Bruce calls urgently. “Dick!”

He gets no response.

oOo

Dick is staring at a white ceiling when he realizes he’s awake. Sunlight is streaming in through a giant window on his right, and there’s a framed painting of giraffes across from him. He’s tired and confused, and his gut tells him that something is wrong, that something bad happened. His first thought is that he wants his mom.

He turns his head to the left, finding Bruce in a chair and holding his hand.

“Hi,” Dick says, slowly pushing himself into a sitting position. Bruce grunts some kind of greeting and raises Dick’s bed while Dick takes in the medical bracelets on his wrist—one ID bracelet and one that indicates that he’s a fall risk—and the IV in the back of his hand. “What happened?”

Bruce shifts in his chair, face serious. “We were at the gala. You were poisoned.”

Dick matches Bruce’s expression, trying to think. He remembers being with Babs, telling her that something was wrong. Then he’d been on the ground, and there’d been sirens.

“The man who poisoned you had planned to offer me the antidote for a price, but he didn’t realize that you would react to the poison so—so severely,” Bruce explains, rubbing his thumb over Dick’s knuckles. “He was working as one of the waiters and heard the commotion. He came forward shortly after the ambulance left and he’s currently in custody.”

Dick swallows. “Why did he . . .” Why did he poison Dick in the first place? Need money so badly? Feel that poisoning Dick was the only option? “Would it have killed me? If he didn’t give us the antidote.”

Bruce, like always, is honest with Dick. “The doctors were able to stabilize you, but they needed to neutralize the poison quickly, and the antidote did that. It’s hard to say what would have happened without it, but things were touch and go for a while.”

Dick nods, not sure what to say as he takes it in. Eventually, he asks, “How long have I been out?”

“A few days. You woke up a few times yesterday, but you were incoherent,” Bruce says.

Dick wracks his brain, trying to pull up some inaccessible memory.

“I’m sorry that this happened, Dick.”

Dick squeezes Bruce’s hand. “Not your fault.”

“Hnn.”

“What? Are you seriously guilty that you didn’t taste all of my food first or something? ‘Cause that’s nuts, B.”

Bruce says, “You are my child. I am allowed to feel guilty when I fail to protect you.”

“You didn’t fail,” Dick interjects. “I’m okay—really.”

Bruce’s face is still pinched and concerned, and he’s looking at Dick like he might fall apart. Dick leans toward him and stretches his arms out, and Bruce quickly pulls him into a tight hug.

“I’m not going anywhere, Bruce,” Dick promises. And even to himself, it doesn’t sound like a reassurance most nine-year-olds should be giving. But it fits with his new life, he supposes. “I’m okay.”

Bruce tucks Dick’s head under his chin, says, “I was . . . I’m glad that you’re alright.”

Dick nods into Bruce’s chest and lets himself be held for another moment. It’s not the hug from his mom that he woke up wanting, but it’s close. It makes him feel safe and reminds him of home, and maybe that’s all Dick needs.

[contrispos]

Episode 8 - Reunion

[Star Wars: The Bad Batch]

WARNING: This thing is long AF

—

Oh no… oh shit… stop… Okay I’ve missed Mr Toothpick here we go

PLEASE LET HIM GO

LET HIM BE WITH HIS BROTHERS AGAIN GODDAMMIT

“It’s Clone Force 99” with a completely monotone voice… stop…

Can Lama Su stop calling them Experimental Unit 99??? THEY ARE SOLDIERS BITCH GIVE THEM SOME RESPECT

TERMINATE THEM?????????? FUCK YOU RAMPASS

Omega is so focused I love it🥺

Wrecker really knows his stuff… so much for being the dumb one(no offense)

Oh my god I know the stress she’s going through… gosh I hope Wrecker has a brain and doesn’t actually blow the whole thing up

YES UNCLE WRECKER

Mom is coming… Dad wants you back on the cruiser

ECHO DID A SUPERHERO LANDING

Awwwwwww I can’t with Wrecker and Omega🥺🥺🥺🥺

FUCK YOU SCRAPPERFUCKS

OH YEAH

THIS IS THE SOLDIER STUFF I CAME FOR

Can Omega stop being the cutest thing ever??

“That’s not comforting” Tech… I can’t explain how much I love you okay???

I got a bit of a heart attack when Wrecker hit his head AGAIN… but then I remembered the last episode…

TECH WHY DIDN’T YOU SHAVE THE OTHER SIDE??????? YOU HAD A CHANCE TO ACCEPT YOUR PUNK SIDE COME ON!!!!!!

Tech’s helmet is the cutest thing, he constantly looks like a little puppy🥺

I don’t like Hunter’s helmet tho… can’t explain it

Wrecker’s undying love for explosives, I can’t

No shit Tech, the lights LITERALLY JUST TURNED ON OF COURSE THE POWER IS BACK

TECH STOP BEING CUTE

I KNOW IT’S JUST HIS VOICE BUT IT’S CUTE AS HELL

THE WAY HE SAYS OMEGA

Echo… Just join Rex goddammit we know you want to

Is it just me or did Echo’s accent just fuck up a bit?? He almost sounded drunk… aRE yOu dRuNk?

YES IT’S THE TECH SCENE FROM THE TRAILER

HE’S TINKERING

TINKER ON BOY

COME ON TECH CAN YOU JUST GET PROPER ARMOR FOR GODS SAKE???? PROTECT YOUR THIGHS!!! PROTECT YOUR NECK!!!!! PROTECT YOUR BALLS I MEAN COME ON

Oh Tech my sweet, sweet darling Tech… JUST TALK ABOUT YOUR EMOTIONS!!!! TALK ABOUT THE STRESS YOU WERE UNDER DURING THE WAR!!!! TALK ABOUT YOUR FEAR OF LOSING YOUR BROTHERS!!!! I WANT TO BE HURT REAL GOOD!!! IF I DON’T NEED THERAPY AFTER AN EPISODE YOU HAVE FAILED!!!!

Okay please tell me Omega is standing on something, I really don’t want Tech to have worse posture. I know he’s 6’4” so like Omega should be WAY shorter than that compared to him

Ah shiet

Stop

No

Company, leave!!

Go

Away

LISTEN HERE YOU GIRAFFE!!!! I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN IF YOU DO ANYTHING TO MY PRECIOUS CHILD OKAY

Oh god

Stop this right now

DAMN HE IS LOOKING GOOD

sorry

I don’t like this

Crosshair knows them so well this isn’t good

WAS THAT??? NO IT CAN’T HAVE BEEN? WAS THAT HOPE IN HIS VOICE?? IS HE HAPPY TO FINALLY BE WITH THE BATCH????

Stop it I don’t like not liking clones

Oh Crosshair I have missed you and all but can you just like leave??

Oh my god the regs really are stupid huh?

Tech I love you you little smartass

Crosshair, stop it, get some help

I am honestly pissed at Tech, like constantly… WHY DOES HE GET FUCKING PERFECT THIGHS AND I DON’T

Oh hell nah

🎶 fuck this shit i’m out 🎶

i don’t like this

i’m scared

Tech you sneaky bastard

TECH STOP BEING SO EXCITED ABOUT MASS MURDER

I don’t like when Crosshair disrespects my children like that

I’m crying

this is too much

Omega, you get a golden star for being cute as fuck

Tech, you get a golden star for being cute as fuck

The rest of you, you get to sleep on the floor

OH HELL NO

DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE

“Your issue is with me, not her” Hunter, your dad is showing. Like literally it’s consuming you

HUNTER I TOLD YOU LAST WEEK THAT THIS WAS NOT THE KIND OF HUG I MEANT

HOLY FUCK MY FAMILY IS HOME I CANT LAUGH NOW

THAT SCREAM

AHHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA

Wrecker this isn’t a video game, you know that right??

TECH HOLDING OMEGAS HAND??? KILL ME NOW

WAIT

crosshair held the side of his head

DOES THAT MEAN????

weeeee a slide

Oh Wrecker I love you

We should let them have more slides

I think it could be mutually beneficial

They have fun, I get some extra serotonin

Hey! You should have let him finish!

What are the engines capable of, Tech? *blinks unnaturally quickly*

HUNTER HOW FUCKING STRONG ARE YOU???

How did you do that? I wanna save Tech too 🥺👉🏻👈🏻

Crosshair clearly isn’t used to talking this much, his voice sounds kinda sore…

Tech could you maybe like, stop being emotionless? YOU ARE ABOUT TO DIE

holy fuck they’re gonna die

no

ohhhh no

no no no no no no no

OH YEAH MY SMART BABIES I LOVE YOU

OH MY GOD

they really are a group of dads

NOOOOO TURN THEM OFF

CROSSHAIR

NO

STOP

TURN THE ENGINES OFF MY BABY IS DYING

Omegas little welps🥺🥺🥺

CROSSHAIR MY CHILD

HE LOOKED SO SCARED

okay, who did that?

CAD FUCKING BANE????????

ARE YOU KIDDING ME????

THIS JUST BECAME A WHOLE ASS WESTERN

THE MUSIC AHHHHHH

HOLY FUCK I NEVER THOUGHT ID BE EXCITED ABOUT CAD BANE YET HERE WE ARE

no

stop

nuh uh

nope

i’m out

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD

NO

HUNTER

STOP

OMEGA

Oh no

Crosshair is properly fucked

oh shit

IT CANT STOP THERE

okay not gonna lie that was a gorgeous scene

is that what it looks like in their helmets??? really? I thought is was just like, a window, but this makes more sense

HOLY FUCK

created by DAVE FILONI yeah bitch I am gunning for you. I will find you, and i will kill you.

BITCH