#idk. maybe I’ll regret this
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victory-cookies · 2 months ago
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resigned from the frozen food store!!!
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I AM EXCITED FOR FRANCIS’S STORY!!! I WANT HIM TO GET WORSE PERSONALLY!!!
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yellowplumfruit · 1 year ago
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this is gonna be a long one so bare with me as i ramble
i’ve realized fairly recently that doing art as a job is never going to be sustainable for me. while my hands being injured absolutely sucks and i hate it, it’s made me realize i was actually really stressed out, especially since art has been my single source of income. being a working artist means that there will be very little structure and it’s all on me to create my schedule. i can’t do that very well! and not it a “woe is me i cant do it”, but more of a “i understand my limits”.
the timing of this sucks though because i literally have one more semester left until i finish my art degree :’) but after the initial panic im actually kind of excited! i’ve actually decided that once i finish my degree, im going to get my prerequisites out of the way and then major in marine biology (nobody saw this coming)!!! i’ve always had a tough time seeing my future as a professional artist. it’s much clearer now with this new potential job:)
so once my hands get better (please please please be soon oh my god), i’m going to take less commissions and draw for myself more often 💕
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adxmanial · 3 months ago
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#having a time again#I fucking hate rsd#I hate just feeling the overwhelming urge to go scorched earth and abandon everyone and everything I’ve ever known#I thought I had it under control and it got triggered again recently#and it leaves me fucking exhausted and regretting all my life decisions in the end#hate fucking relapsing#hate being unable to read people’s minds#being built fucking Wrong#and having people hate me for reasons I’m not even Aware of because I can’t pick up on it and no one just fucking Talks#no one just Says when they’re bothered they let it fester and then it’s My fault#I didn’t Completely burn this bridge yet but god I am staring at it with a lighter and gasoline in hand#all that’s stopping me is that what I’m about to burn meant and still does mean a lot to me but#I can’t keep fucking doing this#it always ends like this#it never fucking changes and I don’t know why I bother I should stay in my little hole Alone where no one can hurt me#and I can’t accidentally hurt anyone else#idk man#having a fucking time#and maybe I shouldn’t even be Talking about it here#becuase who cares it’s social media#but if I don’t spill my guts Somewhere then I’ll fucking explode and cut ties with Everyone in my life at a trigger’s notice#and I need to pour this out somewhere Else#so I Don’t do something I know is Bad#in a moment of fucking rsd anxiety panic attack#lays down under my rock and dies#becomes a mushroom#if I’m a mushroom I’ll have no more problems#the mushroom hive mind will understand me and I will understand the mushroom hive mind
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treecakes · 2 months ago
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i would like to go back to virginia and particularly that town bc apparently the town itself is nice we just lived wayyyy outside of it. but so much of my father’s family lives around there and i don’t want to 😭
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entriprises · 2 months ago
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like this for a little bob starter based on one of the million and one fun facts i have about him jumping around in my head
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the-painted-siren · 2 years ago
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Tried re-designing a better gi/hero outfit for Calem and I think I like this better than the first rendition. It doesn’t look like a cheap costume anymore
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phantomram-b00 · 1 year ago
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the most Crowley coded thing I’ve ever done is eat an Kit Kat bar whole instead of breaking it apart.
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shortson · 4 months ago
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rewatching aloto and my god…….. television really died the day it was cancelled
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jesse-pinko · 7 months ago
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I actually want kids someday but who am I kidding. I can’t even raise a dog I passed down my incapacitating anxiety to my fucking dog. My ass is not breaking the cycle lmao
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shatterthefragments · 7 months ago
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I still have a headache but at least I’ve had a nice mocha :)
The barista didn’t charge me for oat milk either 🥹
I got to see my coworker’s lovely paintings!
We’re having frozen dinners tonight (which is good bc if he wants to bitch I didn’t make dinner fuck him and also there will be food) which is low effort for me yay
I am. In no way able to drive in to school so I’ll just work off of my laptop instead and squinty (which probably won’t help my eye hurting but ah well) maybe tomorrow. (My plan for wed work is literally to either convince mum to drive me in or to take a taxi bc I am. Not going to be able to drive on Wednesday morning)
I’ll just. Shower. Begin anew. And fucking get to it.
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psychicthepsychic-daily · 7 months ago
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pondering how Myth and Fear were both exploited and hurt by their conjurers and how Psychic killed his conjurers almost immediately after being created
it's interesting to me at least bc that shows that psychomancers are really only conjured when people need or want something from them. their only purpose for existence is to serve other beings. they are essentially sentient tools. at least from what I've gathered.
but Psychic killed his creators. I wonder why, or how he knew to. I wonder if he ever looked back on it later on and wondered how different his life might be if he'd chosen to serve them. could it have been better than what his current master has done for him? Psychic wouldn't think so, but he can't help but idly consider it. I wonder if he considers meeting his master a lucky break. compared to Myth and Fear, the first half of Psychic’s life was a lot lonelier, but maybe he was better off for it in the end.
he’s likely happier serving someone other than his conjurers because even if he didn’t like it at first, Psychic chose his master. he got a say in who he was to serve. even if living as a tool was inevitable, Psychic was never someone who would accept his fate lying down, not if he had a chance to find something better.
serving his master in the beginning seemed like the most productive out of multiple equally terrible options, but Psychic got to choose it. that’s already much better than what Myth and Fear were dealt, and it wouldn’t have been possible if Psychic accepted a lifetime of serving his conjurers. as a result of that, Psychic probably has much more respect for his master than he ever would for his conjurers, because as far as I can tell, to create a psychomancer is to assign someone a job before they are even born. it’s the magical equivalent of having a child to save your marriage. /hj
it’s an inherently selfish thing, conjuring a psychomancer, and Psychic doesn’t respect selfishness. but his master was willing to take him in, no matter what Psychic’s original purpose for existence may have been, and raise him into something more powerful and deadly than Psi could have seen in himself otherwise. and that is something Psychic can respect.
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xannerz · 1 year ago
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honestly used to daydream abt having multiple degrees and being that sorta 🤪lifelong learner🎓 but law school devastated me so much I’m averse to the idea of taking cc classes for funsies now
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dancing-with-stars · 9 months ago
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guys. guys !!!!
#vanu is rambling#ok idk this is gonna b a happy post but i think there are lots of people who love me in this world. or at least enjoy my presence.#like i always always always ALWAYS doubt if my friends or family like me and in my head they all secretly hate me#but like for these past couple months things have been different.#i don’t feel so left out (like i usually do in groups) or alone.#like my friends genuinely want me there like they always ask me to go places with them. and i almost always say no because im so busy or#i just cant but they still ask me everytime. yesterday the whole group was calling and playing a game and i got a bunch of texts like hey#where are you u shud join the call it’s rly fun ! but i just couldn’t bring myself to talk to anyone at that moment.#today they were rly happy when i joined the call and idk it made me feel like. oh. maybe my friends do like me#and also i have two moods: i’m either super talkative or i go into my little shell and don’t say anything/add to a convo. and like during#those moments they’ll be like hey u ok? or they’ll just listen to me talk about ceramics and how fun it is or how much i hate eating pears#and like. we laugh so much together. like i have so much fun with all of them i love every single one of them omg#and scary thing is we might not even be friends after we start college. but yk what? that’s okay i don’t wanna think about that.#because like who cares? i’m not gonna let my fears ab the future ruin my friendships. i’ll always love them anyways. and we’ll always call.#i’m glad i met them. they’re all such beautiful and funny and amazing strong willed-people. they are my friends.#it’s just so crazy to me that they willingly want to spend time w me and are sad when i can’t. and they’re so understanding at the same time#they don’t get mad about it. and like they have mad eng last year in high school so much more enjoyable.#someone told me that this is ur last year do things so when you look back you don’t regret anything- so you can be proud of what you did#and my friends helped me with that. and like i still feel lonely the majority of the class because despite this there’s like a permanent#stain of sadness right there at the bottom of my heart. but they make the hard days more manageable.#like i’ve been on call with these people until ungodly hours at night just laughing and i go to sleep feeling a bit lighter.#they introduced me to the tech side of theater which i never thought i’d get into but here i am. they teach me silly facts and words in asl.#they taught me dances- knowing full well i SUCK at it- because we all had fun with it. theyve taught me it’s OKAY to be vulnerable in#friendships and that sometimes being open/yourself is quite literally the best thing you can do for your own soul and others. they’re cool#people really. really cool people
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stinkrascal · 1 year ago
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😴
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justsquibby · 1 year ago
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- Spooked at both Pity’s
- but!! got her 1st slot right after first pity
- 2nd Slot from 200 coins
-event memo to MLB
Overall? Happy. (I have had worst luck from this game so I can’t complain too much…) My memo luck stays thriving, slot luck about the same as usual. But I needed a little more light unit MP boost and Duo units are my fav units in game (and we haven’t had once since Nayuta & Mikage I think) soooo I be happy I got the lesbians
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