#idk wtf i'm yapping about

[nox-in-a-box]

I love you fanfiction authors. I admire that you let a piece of your soul separate from you for the sole reason that you feel so strongly towards a particular piece of media. Your work is a small part of my soul now too.

[mnty-bubblegmyum]

this song to my bf

[sheeshiki]

many many many thoughts about shadowbringers and lightwardens and sin-eaters. a little thing i've been working on while i go through the expansion..........

[ladcedes]

controversial!

summary f1 heartthrob lando norris starts dating a hot, up-and-coming celebrity with a not-so-hot personality and some fans protest…

disclaimer reminder this is completely fictional!!! the “faceclaim” (very loosely) may be rachel zegler but in no way am i basing it off her personality!!! no hate to her at all i love her sm

the tweet:

comments

user-1 isn't this lando norris' new gf

user-2 no way she's featuring on a DRAKE album 💀💀

yourusername

Liked by bellahadid and 223,449 others

yourusername one thing about me and red carpets... i'll always be serving cunt ❤️‍🔥

view all 442 comments

hunterschafer yess always serving the best looks

bairdballad absolute icon!!

(liked by lando norris)

⤷ bairdballad wtf lando liked this

⤷ snowangel @.bairdballad lando is so real for that

landonorris always a stunner

⤷ yndefender so can we take this as confirmation that they're together

⤷ ynmyloves @/yndefender if this isnt confirmation idk what is 💀

ln4life her language is so vulgar why would lando be with her

⤷ futuref1w4g ikr she's such a bad influence

⤷ angelyns icb you actually said vulgar 💀 lando norris is a fully grown!! BRITISH!! man!!

⤷ milcedes @.ln4life @.futuref1w4g average instagram comments...

lewishamilton 👏👏👏

⤷ ylnstars LEWIS??? lando you better get tf up

⤷ ultraviolenced ariana what are you doing here

2007wdc we should expect lando of all drivers to be with a girl like her most tbf

⤷ 9thwdc aside from lewis

lando.jpg

tagged: yourusername

Liked by daniel3.jpg and 342.112 others

lando.jpg and that marks the end of the 2023 season ✨

view 4 comments

yourusername not a single pic of my face yet you tag me... someone tell him that's not how soft launches usually work

⤷ lando.jpg @.yourusername who says i'm trying to do a soft launch

⤷ yourusername @.lando.jpg you showed me hundreds of other 8K HD pictures of me with my face and only post faceless ones?

⤷ lando.jpg @.yourusername maybe i'm just gatekeeping your face

⤷ yourusername @.lando.jpg it's ok lan, you can stop trying to cover up your loser soft launch attempt, i'll still love you

comments have been disabled

yourusername

tagged landonorris

yourusername cheers to the haters 🥂 he still loves me xx

3 December 2023

view 316 comments

georgerussell63 @ landonorris Your gf is scary help

landonorris you tell em babe

norrislclrc queen behaviour i say

ln4life can’t believe he’d get with you

⤷ ynloml and? you think he’d ever look in your direction?

⤷ ynvfx literally get a life how are you still out here yapping about them even on insta??

ladcedes using this "comment" as an author's note! this is so scuffed im sorry i started it back in early december planning to do more for it but i got busy and atp just wanted to get it done 😭

⤷ ladcedes so for anyone confused about the drake album randomly being there… yeah…

[zombvic]

VROOM (harry lewis x reader)

summary : in which y/n and harry get invited to go to the silverstone formula one grand prix (2023)

face claim : no one exact

notes : im an absolute noob at writing fics so please excuse the quality lmao. im petrified of posting on here but ive been thinking about starting a blog for over a year. im open to feedback, opinions and any sort of questions/advice is welcome! i happen to waffle a lot so just skip those parts if uninterested. this is my first post so enjoy �� also pls request because i have the creativity of a koala so id appreciate some ideas :D

pairings : harry lewis x reader , lando norris x platonic!reader

"WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?! Are you actually serious?" You asked your boyfriend in genuine shock, followed by a laugh from the man dressed in head to toe in Ferrari merch. The red and yellow colors clashed hilariously with the sleek, orange McLaren paddock pass hanging around his neck.

"What? I thought I'd support the winning team." He shrugged, a cheeky grin spreading across his face. You and Harry got invited by the Mclaren F1 team to watch the Silverstone Grand Prix from the paddock. As a Formula 1 fan youself, you were excited to see the cars upclose. To watch the mechanics to the pitstops, engineers do their things (idk what they do lmao) and to watch Max Verstappen overlap the whole grid like seven times. Even since you were a little kid you were amazed by those cars driving freakishly quickly. Now, several years later you get to experience it right infront of your eyes.

"Look, there's Lando!" Harry pointed out, spotting your friend talking to a group of mechanics. You approached Lando, who broke into a wide grin as he saw you. "Hey! There are my favorite YouTubers!"

You beamed. "Lando! It's so good to see you. How's it going?"

"It's been wild but amazing," Lando replied, glancing at Harry. "And I see you've managed to get Harry in the right gear this time."

Harry laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, I had a little help with that."

Lando gave you two a playful nudge. "So, who are you rooting for today? Besides me, of course."

You laughed. "Well, McLaren, obviously. But I'm also excited to see how the Brits perform. It's going to be an interesting race."

"That's the spirit," Lando said, his eyes twinkling with excitement. "Alright, I better get back to my team, but I'll see you guys later? Enjoy the race!"

You and Harry found a spot in the back of Landos garage, it had a view on the screens but also the pit-stop. The whole race went by fast. The moment the lights went out Lando tried his hardest with a deserved P2 at his home race.

Liked by mclaren, f1 & 1,002,485 others.

yourusename mom, i got invited to the silverstone grand prix.. still lowkey in disbelief like wtf.. me?? anyways, tysm mclaren 🩷 enjoy my lovely film camera dump raaaah.

View all 2,547 comments.

user harry looking fine as always😍

user y/n and lando finest friends

wroetoshaw whos the first fella hes fit

- yourusername he has a girlfriend..

user i can imagine y/n just walking around taking pictures of everything and everyone 😭😭😭

user i almost melted when they came on the screen

- user me too 😭 forgot i was watching f1 for a second

wroetoshaw i still think i shouldve worn my ferrari outfit #hater

- yourusername youd be sticking out like a sore thumb youre lucky i stopped you #loser #youalmostworepajamapants

user y/n looked so good there 😍

user i LIVE for y/n and landos friendship

faithlouisak i cant believe you chose him over me..

- yourusername im sorry bae.. next time im taking u

faithlouisak finest woman out there

calfreezy wtf fake friends.. theburntchip are you seeing what im seeing ???

- theburntchip bunch of fakies😔

holy what a yap fest lmfao please someone REQUEST something 😭 cause this is too plain.. !

[n0vazsq]

Romeo and Juliet | RC5 x Reader

pairing . . . rafael camara x non!famous!reader

summary . . . When an iconic kiss happens after Rafael's championship win, fans dig deep to find out who the mystery girl is

request . . . kind of?

word count . . . N/A

warnings . . . none! just some badly translates portuguese bc i dont speak it...

faceclaim . . . random girls from pin // reader isn't fluent in portuguese so she doesn't speak it much but i'll put translations when she does

alexavia yaps . . . legit had this in my drafts for like a week ive been procrastinating this for AGES like idk why?? SO SORRY ITS SHORT </3 anyway i hope you guys like this bc its a bit rushed and kinda shitty like.... also theres gonna be some prema driver features so yeah!!

yourusername

liked by rafaccamara88, premaracing, jameswharton and 681 others

yourusername race one done!! can't wait for race two! my boy is going to win the championship <3 tão orgulhoso de você meu amor! te amo muito <3 (so proud of you my love! love you so much <3) tagged: rafaccamara88

click to view all comments

yourfriend1 congrats to rafa! Liked by yourusername

rafaccamara88 muito obrigada, princesa (thank you so much, princess)

yourusername so proud of you rafa!! you deserve it!

yourbsf GUYS MY HEART

username mom and dad

username i'm so happy y/n isn't famous we need to gatekeep her

username she's the best WAG and also so nice!! we have to protect her from the public eye

username the cutest couple Liked by yourusername

rafaccamara88

liked by yourusername, premaracing, yourbsf and 231k others

rafaccamara88 we did it! thank you so much for the prema team and my teammates! and to my amazing girlfriend, thank you for the support and encourgment. i wouldn't be here without you ❤ tagged: premaracing, jameswharton, ugougochukwu, yourusername

click to view all comments

username CONGRATS RAFA

username VAMOS BRASILIA!

username amazing race!

yourusername AWW OMG <33 ILYSM RAFA!! CONGRATS ON THE CHAMPIONSHIP!!

rafaccamara88 I LOVE YOU MORE

username GUYS DID YALL SEE Y/N AND RAFAS KISS I AM NOT OKAY

username THE KISS OMGGGGG

username THEM KISSING WAS SO ICONIC

f1waggossip

liked by motorsportwags, premaladies, frecagfs and 661k others

f1waggossip who was the girl behind rafael camara's iconic championship kiss? find out more about yourusername and who she is!

click to view all comments

username NOOO MOTHER Y/N IS BECOMING KNOWN TO THE PUBLIC

username we failed in our mission guys </3

yourusername didn't know i became famous, thanks ig?

username HELP I LOVE YOU Y/N

yourusername sorry!! i only love rafa 🥰

username she's so pretty wtf?? i'm jealous

username RAFA WATCH IT SHES MINE

username FELL TO MY KNEES Y/N ISNT OUR SECRET ANYMORE

yourusername

liked by rafaccamara88, premaracing, racerbia and 12.4k others

yourusername guess im famous now? dont worry ill NEVER forget my og followers <3

click to view all comments

username dont forget us y/n

yourusername never queen

username y/n saying she'll never forget the og fans 🥹 my heart can't take this

rafaccamara88 i'll love you even if you were the least famous person on this earth

yourusername RAFA HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU

yourbsf if you didn't tell him you told ME

racerbia Y/N WE NEED YOU IN THE ACADEMY RACES

yourusername I PROMISE IM TRYING TO ATTEND ALL OF THEM BUT THE FRECA SCHEDULE DOESNT LINE UP </3

jameswharton my best friend is becoming famous 😔

yourusername i'll never forget you jamie

username Y/N AND THE PREMA RACERS IM GONNA CRY

username HER CALLING JAMES 'jamie' I'M DEAD

jameswharton

liked by rafaccamara88, yourusername, racerbia and 98.1k others

jameswharton sappiest but cutest couple i know tagged: rafaccamara88, yourusername

click to view all comments

yourusername aren't we the only couple you know?

rafaccamara88 yes james

jameswharton SHUT UP N/N

yourusername no <3

username not y/n and james fighting HELP

username AWW THEYRE SO CUTEEE

username james wharton, professianal rafay/n photographer

racerbia my photos are better what is this?

yourusername yes yes they are

jameswharton why is everyone bullying me today??

rashidaldaheri rashid erasure

yourusername sorry rashid xx

rafaccamara88

liked by yourusername, yourbsf, jameswharton and 184k others

rafaccamara88 minha linda menina. eu te amo mais do que tudo. tenho muita sorte de ter você na minha vida para me apoiar e me animar. te amo ❤ (my beautiful girl. i love you more than anything ever. i am so lucky to have you in my life to support me and cheer me on. love you) tagged: yourusername

click to view comments

username SHES SO PRETTY

username my wife rafa back off

yourusername eu te amo mais do que tudo <33 (i love you more than anything)

rafaccamara88 <3

racerbia woah

rafaccamara88 me on a daily basis

yourusername YOU GUYS I LOVE YOU

jameswharton FINE ILL ADMIT IT

yourusername say it jamie

jameswharton ...you are aesthetic

yourusername WOOHOO!

username i need a rafa-y/n kind of love

username young love is beautiful

username modern day romeo and juliet

[just-your-average-author]

TIT RECAP/THOUGHTS

SPOILERS OBV

Okay so firstly the open PSA that Dan wrote about "no photos or videos if you do, I will sue your ass to the ground" and "no flash photography do you want Phil to fall off the stage...again?!?!?" killed me. it was so cute

preshow playlist, stunning, beautiful all around bops.

the sudden cut off of the music and lights to signal the show started, genuinely shocked and I was SAT let me tell you.

THEY CAME OUT AND THEY WERE REAL?!? NOT A SIMULATION?? listen I still can't get over that, I can't believe they were real people who look and sound exactly like they do on my tv at home!! I was so focused on them and soaking every moment in, I couldn't handle it

have I mentioned how attractive they are?!?!?

okay also literally Phil straight up STOPPED THE SHOW BECAUSE HE HAD TO SNEEZE AND DAN JUST STARED AND WAS LIKE PHIL WTF and I loved every second I was like yes this is straight up what they do in videos, let's have our little squirrel moment babes.

plus it made it feel even more silly and improv, overall I know obv they scripted a lot but it was sooo interactive and they ad libbed so much and I adored it

the dollhouse recap i swear wtf. first off, it was such a creative and fun idea and the different sets, and dressed up dolls that the clothes matched!! also okay I'm so sorry I had no idea the random sex positions would be a theme of the show so I was gobsmacked, but the 69ing during pinof??? "so we did what 2 closeted twinks did upon meeting each other for the first time.... put sharpie's cat whiskers on!!!" shut up for the love.

I genuinely loved the role model or no-el model segment. my show was in NC so they first option for Dan as the Mr. Lawyer was he bans ___ and someone said south carolina and they both just were rendered speechless and were like damn oh dear but laughing too.

The boxing match was so hot dear heavens, Dan's expression when Phil came out in the fake- *cough* I mean very real abs. He was acting for his LIFE.

the confessions were so good, just wish it lasted a little longer. the yapping was good and also idk if this was standardized but the whole thing where Phil said "I have a cute but also sociopathic thing going on and I think it's working for me 😌" like shut up you're so adorable

omg the quick change where they kept their mics on and narrated so many innuendos I was dying omg so silly and so funny I loved it. I was really impressed with how fast they changed, but also talked the whole time.

I loved every single solitary part of this show and I loved how they joked about how they were sorry we all went to school with whiskers then got out in the trash (cause yeah basically) and how they literally did raise us and should be blamed for us being feral not our actual legal guardians.

okay so. this show 9/10. here's where the last 1 point went.

please don't kill me, but I wasn't a fan of the song. I'm not entirely sure what it was, but the whole show was so raw and perfect and then the song was just really synthetic and overly autotuned where I personally didn't even hear their voices. like I couldn't tell who was singing which part. the ukulele part was cute, and I really hoped that would've been all of it, I guess the internet is here and interactive introverts and everything's fine just was so good you couldn't raise the bar again, but that was just my personal opinion, I know a lot of people loved the song and it was catchy and cute, I'm just not personally a fan of kpop/synthesized music so I was a little disappointed in the song but the dancing slapped so hard.

Dan flawlessly executing every move and strut and making eye contact with us while Phil very intentionally was focused on not tripping or walking off the stage and looking at Dan a few times to check if he was doing it right MY HEART.

cuties, gay, both of them, love them

overall I spent last night frantically calculating if I could afford to spontaneously go see the Nashville show as well and spend another 10 hours in the car today but regretfully thought against it.

[burningcheese-merchant]

You have single handedly converted me into a burningcheese fan and it is now my hyperfixation fuck you /j (ty for feeding me 🫶🏼), in all seriousness I saw your fics and damn your writing is good :D I'm glad I wasn't the only one thinking spice was kinda acting yandere in the story 😭also the fankids are so cute omgg 💞 I'm sorry for yapping haha, have a lovely day/afternoon/evening :)

Hehehehehehehehehehehe I dragged someone else into the cult, there is no escape, you will ship BurningCheese or face the death penalty (seriously though, thank you! I cannot stress enough how happy it makes me that my writing brings people joy. I have many more fics planned for the future because I, too, am now fixated on this ship to the point of insanity, so stay tuned! I shall feed the BurningCheese nation until my kitchen blows up)

Tbh you kind of had to have been blind to NOT notice how down bad Spice was acting in episode 6 lol. There were hints of BurningCheese in episode 5, and then for ep 6 they just decided to go ham, I guess lol. Calling her "little bird". Smiling and laughing and CELEBRATING when she busts out of jail, saying he knew she wouldn't disappoint him. Pushing her to get high with him (wtf was with him constantly bringing up "the spices in the air" and telling her to breathe them in???). Tracking her either by her smell or her aura, idk he just always knew where she had been and there's a weird implication there lol. TELLING HER TO HER FACE THAT HE WILL DESTROY EVERYTHING TO GET HER. That demonic grin and laughter when she awakens, bro is HAPPY. EXCITED. Probably popping a boner tbh lmao. BurningCheese is canon, you guys, it's crazy /j

And thank you about the fankids 😭😭😭 I know I don't draw well at all, but I try (hopefully I start to improve eventually lol). I put a lot of thought into them both and I just love them a lot 😭 I can't wait to share their stories with you all, I have so much already done or planned and I really hope people take interest and stick around to hear it all

[artificialchaoscola]

CW for mentions of inc*st/implied inc*st + (hopefully unintentional) misogyny in the fandom space in discussions regarding Maria and Shadow's relationship. Serious yap session, please be wary and please read everything if you choose to do so:

I made the horrid mistake of opening Twitter, and I'm shoved headfirst into the horrible world of... Shadow/Maria discourse... Fucking ew.

Typically, when I see something I don't like, I'm a firm believer of the "block and move on" mentality. However, as I'm very passionate about Sonic as a series, I felt the need to weigh in on something I feel a strong distaste for. Another disclaimer: this isn't about anyone in particular but rather a collection of stances about this topic I've seen over the years in this fandom. It's much easier to write out my thoughts here than on Twitter, so sorry to subject you guys over here to the drama happening on the other side! Hopefully, it's coherent. I'm running on NO coffee today////

First and foremost, it goes without saying that misogyny is a huge problem. The hatred of women/non-men manifests itself in all aspects of life, unfortunately, with media being no exception. The perception of women/girls/female presenting characters is undeniably corrupted by the sexualization of female presenting concepts. Be it the way women love, the way they dress, the way they walk, talk, behave. The age, the type of relationship they have with the men around them, etc. does not shield women from sexualization. A lot of media will intentionally lean into perversion regarding ANY relationship between a man and a woman as a result. This is all worth criticizing and analyzing, and it's a topic I've written a ton on in my life.

Regarding Shadow and Maria's relationship specifically, I'll be straightforward: I find it disgusting to depict them in ANY romantic manner, and the defenses I've been seeing of it remind me of the sexualization I mentioned above.

There are so many claims that it is "obvious Shadow loves her more than platonically" because they believe "romantic love is more powerful"... in the same series where Sonic the Hedgehog himself represents a love for life, the planet, and its people. Hell, talking about the same relationship in which Maria held that pure idealistic love for the entire world she never got to return to. This love pecking order always bothers me, as though people haven't moved mountains for family, friends, strangers. It's just aggravating. Even if romance was intended here it's just a stupid thing to say regardless.

Maria and Shadow's interactions on the ARK over the years have been intentionally kept a mystery for the most part. I hope they keep it this way, as I feel it adds to The Point™ that is Shadow's life, but the tidbits we've seen in Dark Beginnings have been showing us what we've known: Shadow was made to cure Maria. Shadow feels insecure about his origins and his inability to cure Maria. Maria is a source of comfort and morality in his formative years, but he was made for her. I'm seeing people claim his devotion is an indicator of romantic love which is just... it's illogical. Romantic love isn't "better" than platonic love as I've stated. Shadow is distraught that he couldn't do the one thing beaten into his head at "birth". He saw her life end right in front of him, helpless to do anything. He's traumatized. Longing for a life in which an innocent girl got to live is not implying anything, I feel most normal people would feel that way.

"Shipping Shadow and Maria makes sense, especially since Sonic is a reincarnation of Maria--" idk wtf I'm reading. If you believe that Sonic can be a reincarnation of Maria, that's fine ig, but you can do this without making it weird. I don't buy into this theory personally, as I Sonic and his friends moreso represent the love Maria hoped Shadow would find on Earth one day, but like... you can make this not weird. Plz ffs--

I have a hard time understanding why anyone would see romantic implications when their interactions have no subtext implying that? I know shipping is for fun and doesn't have to rely on canon, but the entire reason this current discourse is even happening is that people think Shadow daydreaming about Maria being alive and leaning against him is inherently romantic??? tf LMFAO I'm a subtext girly, and I've read SO many things where I wish the romantic subtext didn't exist so it's not like I intentionally ignore it, but it just doesn't exist here. I'm not an end-all-be-all of knowledge of course, and I'm always open to being wrong about analysis in general, but the only thing they have to offer is things that aren't romantic by nature. Things people do with their siblings.

Some people bring up that Shadow's creator and devs at SEGA ship it... and to that, I say who gives a fuck what a writer says if it doesn't exist in the text? Shadow and Maria have never had romantic implications unless you think devotion to someone/their beliefs = romance, which we KNOW is not the case. I don't know where this is coming from exactly either, but I have seen people mention Shadow and Maria were apparently inspired by a couple from Please Save My Earth. I haven't read this so I can't comment on that story, but I have to once again mention the specific context of Shadow and Maria's actual story? If that was the OG intent back when SA2 was released, it's long lost to the direction SEGA ultimately went with. If the current status of their relationship is meant to be interpretable, they failed miserably.

People, rightfully, look at you weird if you ship Sonic with Tails because they're found family (and the age gap but that's obvious lol). Although not related by blood, they've grown together, fought together, and laughed together, forging a bond where they'd literally die for one another. They're brothers without a doubt. So why, then, are Shadow and Maria up for debate? Part of the implications of Shadow's tragedy in SA2, the reason you can compare him and Sonic so easily, is you get to imagine a world where Tails was robbed from Sonic so brutally. Sonic and Shadow are different people, but the reason Shadow is so snarky and cool in SA2 is that he and Sonic may not have been so different if life had been kinder to him. Hidden behind the angst are a ton of qualities Sonic also possesses. And the way I've always read it is that a huge part of why they are the way they are is due to the influence of their siblings to varying degrees. I have to ask: If everything was the same except Sonic or Tails was a girl and the other still a boy, would people suddenly debate if their love is romantic despite all their interactions being the same? If Shadow was a girl, and Maria was still a girl, would everyone suddenly agree they're siblings? I think the answer to both is obvious.

To wrap this all up, I'm just extremely grossed out by this interpretation of their relationship. I personally feel Shadow/Maria is just another case of people not knowing what platonic love is, as well as viewing ALL relationships between men/women in this specific way. I just needed my thoughts thrown out into the universe. Thank you for reading <3

[moonystoes]

Nurse? - Elisa De Almeida x reader (highschool students)

Summary: When the school has never felt this empty, you decide to escape the students by helping out the nurse. Only to find out you can't escape her.

Warning: yap sesh I'm sorry, confusion??(girl me too idk), an annoying guy x

Wc: 5.670k

A/n: Ugh writing the summary is worse than the whole fic wtf. Also finding pics and trying to make the coloring match is shit I'm sorry LMFAO. Apologies for the late post, I've been going through it in school. and as I said again, im pretty new to writing so constructive criticism or advice is needed :)

Part one

This is FANfiction. Please don't view Elisa this way.

-

“Do you know who you're going to prom with?” You turned to look at Sam, walking down the school hallway to your shared class. Prom has been a topic of conversations since they first revealed it two months ago. Now, prom will happen in two weeks, and all the young teens are procrastinating to look for partners.

“Ugh, no! I don't even know why our school decided to add this thing. We don't have to copy Americans, let them do their thing and we will do our thing.” She groaned loudly. You looked around you, noticing people glancing at her weirdly.

“Okay… but the students voted for it, not the school. So technically it's our fault.” You whispered, tugging her closer to remind her to lower her voice. You thought about who might ask you out. Xavi has been eyeing you for a while, but he was caught creating fake Instagram accounts to catfish girls. So there is no possible way of you agreeing to go with him. Edward was a year older than you, and you've been chatting with him at lunch. As much as you enjoyed the conversations with him, you didn't feel anything with him. He was the most attractive guy in his grade, his hazel eyes and dark skin made the girls swoon around him. For you, his personality isn't as attractive as his face, therefore you aren't crazy about him.

Then there is Paul, your childhood friend. You've known him since first grade, sitting together at the school park. In your head, you had imagined your friendship to stay forever, until you both get jobs and live close to each other. But after the both of you hit puberty, he started to act weird and felt uncomfortable around you. You hated it, but you knew it was bound to happen anyways.

It also didn't help you how attractive he grew to be, his short dark hair matched his brown eyes but also contrasted with his pale skin. His soft smile and attentive personality made many of the girls attach to his hip. You were never insecure about your looks, but now you started to question yourself. Did he stop our friendship because I was too ugly?

At some point, some of the girls came up to you and asked what he likes so they can ‘buy him a gift’. Your response was an easy lie, ‘I don't remember, it's been years.’

That doesn't make you guys strangers, he still comes and talks to you every once in a while, just like now.

“Hey y/n… can we talk privately?” Paul startled you. You turned to look at him with confusion, the last time you talked to each other was last month when he asked for the English homework (which you reluctantly gave to him out of kindness… and because you're a people pleaser). You glanced at Sam to check if she's okay with you leaving her, she gave you a small nod and left the both of you alone.

“So… have any plans for the winter dance? Or prom I don't even know what it is.” He awkwardly grabbed your arm and pulled you to the side of the corridor to not interrupt the people walking.

“Are you asking me out as your date?” You questioned slowly.

“What! No…i mean yes. Do you want to come with me?” He shook his head, obviously distracted with something. You stayed silent for a few seconds to think about it. You aren't a ‘party’ person, but the winter prom is a new thing and you wanted to experience it for once. Paul was a complicated guy, he wouldn't talk to you for months and then approach you like nothing happened. At least when he does approach you, he treats you right, or that’s what you thought.

“Sure…do you have any planning? For the dress or just the day as a whole?” You asked. Everytime you watch an American teen movie, you imagine yourself and Mr. Perfect together at a shop buying a dress, the shocked face when they see you going down the stairs all glammed up, going to dinner before prom, and having a soft kiss at the dance…. Although now you don't really feel like sharing your first kiss with Paul.

“Oh?... What thing for the dress? And no, I didn't volunteer for the dance so I didn't plan anything with the organizers,” And just like that your hopes were crushed, of course a 14 year old boy wouldn't know a thing about romance. He clearly didn't care about what dress you'll wear, or what the both of you would do before the event. You shook your head with a sigh, faking a smile and walking past him to your class. “Ohhh! I did vote for you for prom queen… you know? So we both can be like ‘famous’. You should vote for me, if that's what you mean.”

You felt disappointed, pretending not to hear him and walked into your first class. Great. He ruined your day and it just started.

-

Your parents were excited when you told them about Paul asking you. Of course, they've known him for years and his parents are in touch with yours. You were at the store trying to look for an ‘age appropriate’ dress. Your father is staying in the car, obviously fed up with the indecisive behaviors from you and your mom.

“Look, this is great!” You heard your mom cheer from the back of the store, she came up to you with a flower print dress and a bright smile on her face.

“Mom, it looks like I work on a farm.” You sighed, turning to the other side where there are dresses lined up.

“Are you serious? It looks amazing. I like it!” Yeah, you like it. You turned to look at it again, but the sadness in your mother's face caught you off guard. So you decided to lie. You grabbed the dress from her hand and turned it to see it ‘from every angle’.

“You know what? I think it's great. And it's not expensive like the other dresses here.” You faked a smile and looked at the cashier that was standing uncomfortably close to the both of you. You handed her the dress and both went to the checkout.

For you, making decisions isn't something you care about. Everytime you think of something, you'd agree with the others because at the end of the day ‘it's not that serious’. Sometimes, your friends end up scolding you for choosing people's happiness over yours. But when you turned to glance at your mother's happy smile, it was worth it.

-

Wed 19th of December 2012

The next week, Paul had thrown your prom ticket into your locker with no message or any indication. At least he bought you the ticket. Sam has gotten sick as well as the other two girls close to the both of you. She had sent you a message saying she probably won't be at prom, explaining in great details of her vomit and sickness.

You felt all alone and the class has never felt emptier. Fleur had a major knee injury from football practice, two guys were suspended for a fight. Students are calling this week a curse, considering that it's wednesday and prom will just be in a few days. The filled class now is almost half empty, making the class feel quiet.

“Okay…since most of the students are absent, we won't take a lesson today,” Cheers erupted from the class, happy to not have biology. “I'm not done! You will be partnered up to discuss prom preparations.”

The atmosphere changed from cheering to groaning in a second. You glanced at Paul, wondering if he would be your partner. You hoped that Paul would realize he has responsibilities for prom today when the both of you discuss it. But as the teacher started labeling the partners, you realized that it doesn't matter who is your date, she is randomly assigning them.

“Elisa and Marie you don't need to sit at the back anymore, the class is practically empty. Elisa, you sit with y/n. Katoto, sit with Adam.” You sighed frustratingly, why her? During the two months of school, she has been treating you like dirt. Ignoring you and always avoiding you. Whenever teachers put you in groups, she'd ask the teacher if she can be partnered with Fleur instead.

But she's been more open and relaxed now, and it's somehow freaking you out. She has made some friendships there and there with the other girls. She laughs louder, jokes more with her side of the class. And even if her ignorance towards you confused you at first, it wasn’t why you were freaked out. It's how she treats the girls in class. It's like the guys…but gentler? She stares at Amy the same way the guys do, with heart eyes. And all of this frustrates you, because why is she looking at Amy like that? She's not supposed to like Amy. And why is she treating every girl in the class sweetly except you?

Everytime you catch her looking at Amy, you remember that Quora comment. Admittedly, you've been thinking about it everyday for the past 2 months. When you’re near her, you stutter and avoid looking at her eyes. Because when Elisa looks at your eyes, she can read you. And although you know you're not necessarily hiding anything, you don't want Elisa to know how she affects you.

Elisa rolled her eyes in annoyance when the teacher told her to move to sit next to you. Of course it would be you. Your bubbly and nice personality makes her sick, because right when it comes to her, you become mute. It feels as though her sitting next to you makes you feel grossed out and disgusted. It doesn't help how Sam glances at the both of you everytime Elisa walks past you. It's like you have told her something about her, that elisa is some sick joke you told her about. Growing up, Elisa realized that not many people liked her. But she didn't care, until it was you.

You were kind and sweet to everyone. Whenever anyone asks for help, you're always there. Whenever you have to be surrounded by people you don't even like, you're still respectful and treat them well. But why is it when it comes to her, you ignore her? Every time she's near you, she sees your uncomfortable glance, she’s already used to it by now, but it still breaks her.

Homophobia isn’t something surprising, it’s everywhere. But again, the most non-judgemental person… you, she didn’t expect you to be just like everyone else.

She threw her bag next to your seat as she sighed. Of course she’s already groaning around you. You rolled your eyes at her dramatic reaction, pulling open your notes to write anything you need for the prom. You wrote ‘dress’ check, ‘hair’... you’ll just straighten it, ‘make up’ you’ll ask Sam to help you with it. You glanced at Elisa, a blush ran through your face when you saw the sketch of a woman on her notes. Does she have a date? Did she get asked… or did she ask a girl out? There is no way she’d go with a boy… just the idea of Elisa with a boy makes your stomach churn, and you don’t know why it would feel better if she would be with a girl, a person like you.

“Um… so, do you have a date?” You stammered, trying to act casual about the question, as if it hasn’t been on your mind all month.

She looked away from her sketch to glance at you, “no.”

“Why not?”

Elisa was silent for a moment, “Fleur tore her ACL so she won’t come with me.”

Fleur? Why Fleur? Your kind smile slowly turned to a frown, fuck I know I said it would make me feel better if she would ask a girl out but Fleur? Does she like her? No way.

Elisa noticed the way your smile turned into disgust. At first, panic started to get into her head, would you tell everyone that she wanted her date to be a girl? It’s okay, right? A lot of girls go with their friends? Fleur is her friend. But her panic turned into anger, fuck you and your disgusting beliefs. Of course you wouldn’t like the fact she’s into women, and although she never said she's gay out loud, anyone who glances at her knows about it.

“ACL injuries are really serious, tell her I wish her a speedy recovery.” You mumbled, you didn’t know why you’re acting this way, and why does it happen every time with Elisa. Elisa ignored what you said and continued to draw. You were looking at her sketch from the corner of your eyes, what else would she add? Big boobs? Blonde hair? Is her type in girls the same as the boys’? But suddenly Elisa stopped drawing for a second and took a deep breath, then she scribbled all over the drawing, ripping the page away from her notebook and standing angrily to throw it away in the bin.

When she sat back, she moved her seat slightly away from you. You lowered your head feeling shame, what did you do to deserve this from her? Your heart did the fluttering thing again around her, but now it’s because of the heartbreak of rejection. Elisa kept on tapping the pencil on the paper, writing nothing on her notebook. You glanced at Paul, realizing that he was partnered with Amy. Because of the panic of Elisa sitting next to you, you didn’t even think about Paul. Great, Paul is with the hottest girl in class and Elisa here hates your ass, you already knew Sam would be tired from the phone call this evening.

You glanced at the teacher quickly to make sure she's not looking at you. You grabbed your phone and opened the chats between you and Sam and sent her a message.

“Sam I'm sorry for the monster I'd be when we call today.”

Elisa noticed you using your phone, slightly surprised since you've always been the ‘good’ girl of the class. She saw you texting Sam, quickly diverting her eyes away from your phone. Are you texting Sam about the drawing? Is she seriously that grossed out by a silly drawing? Elisa's frustration has faded, now filled with sorrow. How can someone be filled with that much hatred? How can you sit here and act all cute and innocent to everyone but react this way over a drawing?

Right when the bell rang, Elisa grabbed her bag and left first, not even waiting for Katoto. You breathed out slowly, glad that she's not sitting next to you anymore. The rest of the school day was miserable, feeling all alone. At lunch, you sat on the ‘loner benches’, which are placed behind the school buildings near the football pitch. It's called that because nobody usually notices it, so it's always empty. For once, you were too tired to be friendly and socialize with people you can't stand.

When you were watching the football game, you noticed Elisa playing. Sighing, you got up and walked to the building, deciding to help out the nurse in easy tasks like bandages. She likes you, and had previously written notes to the teachers for you ‘to skip’ their classes. And after what happened in class with Elisa, you really didn't want to face her again.

When you reached the nurse office, you saw Ms. Eugene frantically running around her office to grab things into her giant bag. When she turned to look at you she gasped, “oh thank God! I was about to call the office to bring you,” She grasped your arm, pulling you to sit in her office. “My daughter… she's sick, they called right now. Can you please take over my place? You know we don't have other nurses, and I trust you. You're very smart, y/n. If anyone came here with something more serious than a cut, don't hesitate to call the ambulance.” She rambled, her face filled with stress as she grasped her keys.

“I can stay here, just let the office know so I don't get counted as absent,” You were getting more worried about her daughter the more you looked at her. Ms. Eugene is a single mom of a 3 year old girl, having to carry the responsibilities of both parents as one. She nodded at what you said, and pulled the door open. “I hope everything works out with baby Lee.”

She turned to look at you with grateful eyes, and left you alone. You were stressed about the new ‘job’ you got, but excitement started filling you when you looked around. The posters, the small medications, the tapes and bandages. You can now pretend to be a nurse! You pulled out your phone to text Sam about your new adventure, until a knock made you flinch.

You glanced at the door, yelling out a ‘come in’. When the door opened, you heard Elisa's pained voice, “Nurse Eugene?”

When Elisa glanced at you, she rolled her eyes and limped outside, making sure to shut the door as loud as possible. Usually, you would be hurt at this. But by the way Elisa was limping, you jumped up from the big chair and ran out to see what happened.

“Elisa, are you serious?!” You pulled the door open, finding her limping down the stairs. She looks up to see you and asks, “What are you even doing here? Where is the actual nurse?”

“She had a family emergency,” You followed her down the stairs, “Elisa you're limping! I'm just going to tape you and you will not see my face again.” Your voice cracked as you said the last part. Usually you're good at masking your feelings, but Elisa's pained face in front of you and the way she ran away from you broke you.

Elisa groaned loudly and took a step forward, holding onto the stairs’ railing and following you back into the nurse's office. When she got in the room, she limply sat on the bed. Glancing at the wall in front of her instead of you.

She had heard the neediness from your voice, and it made her heart throb quicker. Even when you clearly feel disgust around her, at least you were worried about her right? Did you do this because you cared about her? Or because you didn't want to get in trouble?

You brought disinfectant wipes, a cotton ball, pre wrap, and a tape. You placed them near her on the bed then turned to look at her to see what actually happened. Elisa lifted her foot up to show that the injury was there, and when you looked down you saw a trail of blood and a cut on her lower shin.

You pointed at the bed as your face scrunched in worry. Awkwardly, Elisa twisted her body towards you and layed down, resting her upper body on her arms behind her. You sat on the bed too, making sure the tapes were near you.

You grabbed the wipes packet, glancing at Elisa to make sure she knows it will be painful. But she was already looking at your face, so you panicked and just placed the wipe directly at the cut.

“Fuck!” She pulled her leg away and threw the wipe away. But you grabbed her foot and pulled it to your lap, using a different wipe and attempting to clean up the cut again. Elisa’s hiss was loud, and it involuntarily made your breath hitch and bite your lip for a second. You had to stop being inappropriate and dirty minded. It's disrespectful, so you tried to ignore it and continued cleaning up the wound. But when her defined and thick calf tensed up, you froze. Of course she will have muscles… She plays football!

“Can you be quick? It's burning me.” Elisa's frustrated groan pulled you out of the daydreams, so you quickly placed your right hand on a piece of cotton there and awkwardly tried to place the pre-wrap over it with your left hand. Elisa saw you struggle so she placed her fingers on yours over the cotton pad.

You quickly removed your fingers from her warm hand, and started wrapping her shin tightly with the pre-wrap. It was easier now to be completely focused on the injury in front of you instead of Elisa’s gaze or warm hand, it was your dream to major in a medical field and you didn’t want to harm Elisa or tape it wrong.

All Elisa was doing while you were taping her shin is look at your face. She was intrigued on how you knew how to do this. For her, she plays football and it’s mandatory for all of the players to know how to tape and deal with certain injuries. But for you, she wasn’t sure on how you knew how to do this… or how you’re good at so many things, you were just perfect in everything in her eyes.

She shook her head at her thoughts and looked at your hands instead, watching you bring the sticky white tape and securing her shin just like the physio at her academy. When you were done, you softly tapped her foot, indicating that she can lift it now. She removes her foot from your thighs and twists her body to sit on the bed instead, forcedly turning her head to look at you with a thankful smile, “you taped it well, thank you.”

You shrugged and looked down at both your feet, dangling them around as you bit your lip in embarrassment, “Thank you, I’ve always wanted to do this in the future so…”

“Be a school nurse?” Elisa asked.

“No, just anything with the medical field.” You replied. Elisa didn’t realize how close you were both sitting next to each other until she accidentally nudged your foot when she started moving her feet like you. She stood up, making sure not to put her weight on her foot, and walked to the door.

“Good luck with that, you’re smart and I think you’ll be able to do it.” You looked up to see her at the door, heart slightly warming at what she said. You smiled gratefully at her and nodded, before mumbling a short, “good luck with football.”

Elisa giggled with a shrug at your comment, and closed the door behind her delicately this time. You released a breath you didn’t know you were holding and hid your face in your hands. Why was it comforting to you that she thinks your hard work will actually get you to your dream major? Did she lie to make you feel better?...Elisa hates lying, you have noticed that because everytime she doesn’t like anything she’d stay quiet…not lie.

But the door was opened shortly, Elisa appearing again with a flustered smile, “I forgot to ask you for a nurse pass.”

You raised your face from your hands and nodded in her direction, standing up from the bed to the desk and writing a note. When you reached ‘time:’ on the notes, you turned to look at Elisa, “Hey Elisa… Do you want to go to class now or walk around the school? I can lie about the time and basically give you free time.”

She looked away from a random poster and turned to look at you with a bright smile, the ones kids do when they get offered candy. “Will you actually do that for me?”

You giggled at her reaction with a nod, she skipped happily and sat on the bed again. She turned to look at you with a grateful smile and pulled out her phone from her pocket, “thank you, I can’t stand the PE teacher or any of the students.”

You hummed in agreement as you sat there awkwardly. Elisa continued scrolling through her screen, while you were just looking at her. “If the teacher asks you why it took you so long you should say that you were dizzy and almost passed out because it is mandatory for nurses to keep students in their office for a minimum of 20 minutes.”

She looks away from her phone to look at you for a second before returning her eyes back, “yeah thanks.”

You didn’t like how she wasn’t really talking to you, even when you knew she didn't like you at all. For a second, it felt like all the tension that was there in the morning had oozed away, but you soon realized that you had to accept that the discomfort Elisa felt toward you will always be the same. As you thought of a topic to talk with her, there was a knock on the door.

You glanced back at elisa to signal for her to hide her phone, before calling out a ‘come in’.

When the door opened, you saw Elisa visibly grimace and you realized that it's Paul the moment he said your name, “y/n! Or should I say Nurse y/n?”

You turned awkwardly to Elisa with a confused look. Nobody knew you were there other than the office, how did he know? Your minutes of peace were frustratingly disturbed now that other students know. Elisa shrugged to show you she didn't know how he knew, but she didn't want to admit that she did text Katoto about you helping her skip.

“Hey Paul, do you need a bandage?” You fake smiled at him. After the whole prom planning that happened, you really didn't want to be around him.

“What? No, I'm just here so you can write me a note to skip class.” He laughed as he sat at the seat near you, grabbing a note from the desk and giving it to you so you could write him one.

“I'm not allowed to do that Paul, you know that.” You looked at him disappointedly and returned the pack of excused notes back to where they were. Paul groaned in frustration. He glanced at Elisa on the bed and pointed at her, “what about her?”

“Elisa is dizzy and has to stay here for a while.”

“Y/n do you seriously believe that! C'mon, I'm your prom date! She fell and bled a little, that's all. I was there. Look! She can stand and walk normally with it taped.” He cried out, pointing at Elisa's taped shin.

“Calm down weirdo,” Elisa calmly said. She didn't like the way he was yelling at you, and she was slightly worried if you couldn't think of an excuse to tell him about how she was dizzy so she tried to waste time.

In fact, Elisa didn't know why you were doing this in the first place. Taping her shin is understandable, but helping her skip class? Memories of first period hit her, and now she doesn't understand you.

Paul turned to look at Elisa after what she said, “weirdo? Did you just call me that?”

“Paul, stop acting childish!” You groaned. “Elisa got dizzy…when girls are in their…you know what, they can feel dizzy. Especially when they lose even more blood.” You mumbled to him as you pointed at her shin. It may not be the smartest excuse, but Paul doesn't know a single thing about women's bodies and you know he's going to feel weird and awkward when anyone mentions ‘periods’.

Paul looked down in embarrassment after what you said, turning to look back at you. “Um…sorry I forgot you guys get that, I'll just leave.” He talked under his breath, before opening the door and leaving you both alone.

Both of you and Elisa exhaled in sync, before turning to each other with a soft smile.

Elisa looked away from you to the door, “he's a dick.”

You sighed as you relaxed into the seat, “Yeah I don't know what else to do with him,”

You looked at your painted nails, avoiding Elisa's glance. You wanted to speak about this with someone, but you didn't like to put your problems into someone even if it was your best friend. “He didn't even…bother to ask me out properly like the movies.”

Elisa noticed the deep frown on your face. She never expected a day where the both of you are sitting down and talking about boys, but it felt slightly better to know that you're opening up now especially after the two months of ignoring and distancing yourself from her. Maybe you weren't as mean as she made you seem in her head, and she liked this vulnerable side of you. “Well… he's a guy, what did you expect from him?”

You let out a scoff, “it just feels like no guy is good enough. We always put the effort in everything, he couldn't even care about what dress I'll wear or flowers or anything.”

Elisa wanted to make a gay joke, but she still didn't trust you enough to joke that way. And considering the way you behaved around her drawing just a few hours ago, she didn't think it would be a good idea. “You're too pretty and smart for him anyways.”

You looked up to glance at her, but she was looking at her taped up shin. Did she mean it? A deep blush ran through your face, and you let out a soft giggle at the thought of her thinking you deserve better than the most handsome guy of your class.

“Yeah? Like who?” You questioned. Maybe Elisa knows someone she can set you up with for the next prom, or maybe she can help you find the love you always yearned for but the boys are too immature and inappropriate…Or maybe she'd say she's the one for you.

Elisa glimpsed at you and stayed quiet with no response for a few seconds. She shrugged, “none of the guys here for sure. Maybe somewhere else.”

Elisa didn't like the attention you just gave her. You turned a compliment into a questionnaire she can't answer. But who is there to blame but herself, she's the one who said you deserve someone better. Elisa loved the small giggle that came out of you. No matter how much she hated your behavior towards her, she always liked making girls realize guys are trash.

You crossed your hands in front of you as you rested your head on them, looking up to Elisa from your seat. She was deep in thought, and you started wondering if she'd ever date a girl in your school. Would she give her flowers every week? Would she receive flowers?... She's still a girl no matter how different she dresses, and she still deserves them. Would she be a physical person like the students that do PDA? Or would she pretend she doesn't know her girlfriend to not gain attention?

Elisa noticed you staring at her weird, the same glance she'd see Katoto has when she looks at Adam. Her ears turned pink and she pulled out her phone to complain to Marie about the ‘Voldemort guy’ interrupting what could've been your first ever sane conversation.

You were probably thinking about Paul, right? Maybe your ‘dream’ man since the both of you were talking about it.

You realized your thoughts were drifting too much, so you closed your eyes tightly and hoped sleep would come and take you somewhere away from Elisa. You shouldn't be thinking about her that way. And you also shouldn't assume her sexuality, like what that Quora response said…even after what she said about guys.

Elisa had noticed you sleeping, so she concluded that your dreamy stare at her was probably sleepiness making you tired. She sat there and scrolled on her Facebook and Instagram.

When she realized that it had been over an hour of her time in the office, she knew she couldn't use that excuse anymore and needed to focus on the other classes. She stood up and approached you, whispering your name.

When she didn't see you react, she knew she had to touch you. But she didn't know how, childishly afraid of tapping your arm. Your fringe had been covering your face, so Elisa lightly moved them away and placed them behind your ears, hoping you wouldn't feel her touch. Elisa always had short hair and she never wanted to grow it out, but she still loved the feeling of hair in her fingers. Fleur gets frustrated whenever Elisa plays with her hair, and Katoto has braids so Elisa was ‘not allowed’ to touch her hair no matter what (she tried one day and Marie yelled at her).

Your eyes scrunched at the feeling of soft fingers on your forehead, and when you opened your eyes you saw Elisa's horrified eyes. You sat up looking confused, worrying about why she looked like she had seen a ghost. “umm… sorry for touching your hair I tried to wake you up but you didn't wake up from my voice.” Elisa rambled quickly, stepping away from you towards the door.

“Wait,” you groaned out, “You're leaving me?”

Elisa smiled at your confused face, slowly speaking so you could understand, “I spent too much time here already, I can't miss more classes.”

She almost laughed at the way your face contorted, something deep in her is warming up and now her whole body is burning. She knows she needs to leave this room before her thoughts start spiraling, so she gave you a small wave and left the office.

Maybe it was the sleepiness talking, but for once, you finally knew that Elisa is a sweet person… and your heart break from the morning today came back, when you realized that what happened today was only a one time thing.

___

~ yes, the next chapter will be prom

~ fun fact, there are some countries in Europe that do prom nowadays. Maybe not back in the 2010s but this is fanfiction so xx

~ did you guys notice something about Paul's looks? yeah y/n has a type ;)

[sailingfireshipz]

Ok, are yall ready to yap about WTF is going on with Carver!?

I first want to start off by saying I get that what Carver saw in 12x13 was extremely triggering for him, but what I don't understand is this. He goes to Texas, links up with an old fling for 6 weeks according to the time jump & brings her back to Chicago.

He completely avoids Violet & when he does talk to her, he is the one that said they should move forward as friends. Even after finding out about Tori deleting the text message, he was so quick to fall right back in with her, but he wouldn't even give Violet a chance to plead her case.

Carver decided to lie to Tori & go to Violets's party, so why is he acting like the people at 51 are all of a sudden his enemies? I'm so confused, and it doesn't make sense. Clearly, Tori is manipulating him by keeping him liquored up & dragging him out every night to keep him busy & tired. She doesn't allow Carver to sit still long enough because if he does, he'll have time to actually think/process.

What I'm trying to figure out is if Carver is hell bent on this Tori chick because he feels like Violet rejected him or is directly tied to the call from 12x13.... is it both?

I've said this a few times, but I'll say it again. The damage they are doing to Carvers' character development is baffling to me because i don't understand what the outcome of this storyline is supposed to be. Carvers' overall attitude & presence on my screen is starting to irk me because I want to feel bad for the guy but in the same breath it's hard to overlook all the shit we've already went through with him. Atp, i don't even ship Mikarver anymore because I dont want this version of Carver anywhere near Violet.

Why make Jake a series regular if the intent was to just ruin his character. He literally just got in half of the fandoms' good graces in the back half of S11/ early 12 because of this same shit.

I get the theme of the S13 is hauntings & ppl from the past but we're 6 episodes into the season & we have unearthed NO new information about Carver but we have been vividly reminded why we didn't like him in S11.

He bumped heads with Gallo, and now he's snapping at Ritter. He was getting drunk, getting into brawls & getting locked up now he's showing up to damn near every shift hungover. He was snappy with Stella in S11 & though he hasn't been out of line with her yet the fact that she had to get out of the rig when they were supposed to be responding to a call to come find him....

So like what's the wake-up call & when is it coming? Because my tolerance is starting to dwindle & if his behavior continues to spill over into the house & dynamic of Truck 81 further widening the target on Stella Kidds back with Pascal.....

Idk, am I being too hard on him? Like I said, I feel for the guy, but how much more before we can turn the page? I want the Sam Carver that was there for Gallo & Gibson. The one that showed up for his LT when Shep was outside the loft. The one that told Violet nothing bad was going to happen to him, especially on the dance floor. 🥹

[justydrawz]

UHM HELLO? colors do be coloring‼️‼️‼️ idk who this man is but I love him also the whole time I was drawing him I was thinking about Left on Read specifically the part that goes like uhm "YOUR AUDACITY REACHING OUT TO ME WHEN THE LAST THING THAT YOU SENT ME WAS A HALF HEARTED APOLOGY" (also I apologize for his arms looking so flat 😔😔) [more yapping under the cut]

Yeah no, I'm never panting with color again, when u do it in grayscale, it completely changes ur views on the colors, all I do is make a color pallete swirl it around and then paint in grayscale it's sm fun ‼️‼️

-----

OKAY I MAY HAVE LORE FOR HIM so basically right right, Sun and Moon are 2 famous singers and Sun yk he had a gf but then Moon pulled up and was like "hey baba grill" and she was like 😏 and then cheated on Sun with his BROTHER. (Moon was the one who like initiated it) So Sun is like "wtf man ]:" and gets all sad but then yk they split up from being singing buddies and now are rivals/enemies or whateva

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ALSO I'M REALLY THINKING ABOUT DOING ANIMATRONIC YN X SUN FOR THIS ONE IDK WHY

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Anyways that's it okay byeeeee

[trevination]

I'm curious for marlie have you talked about how they got together? Or shared like a first kiss etc?? I'm actually so curious!

AHHH YESS!! well i havent posted about it but we've tapped about it on discord and AHHH its so important to me omg

okay so. they pine after each other for a WHILE. charlie has always known he's gay so he's just like "i wanna kiss this man so bad" but micah's just casually thinking "it feels like the sun has been brought into my life" and just. Not. realizing he likes him. charlie keeps trying to like hint to micah that he likes him and very casually flirt and show he's interested in him but micah is not fucking catching the hints, even as he's realizing he likes charlie romantically (and micah isn't like. scared or ashamed to be gay honestly he's like "that makes sense" but he knows how awful his life would be if people found out and he cant do that to his family). eventually, charlie's thinking like "oh maybe i've been reading this the wrong way" and he starts like pulling away from micah because he's trying not to hurt himself even more. and micah's just like "????? what? what happened did i do smth"

like u also need to know they are just casually So domestic and gay. like micah gets home from work in the evening and charlie is playing with rosie and messing with the twins and helping them with homework and making dinner. charlie spends Much more time at micah's house than his own (bc his grandparents are neglectful assholes who don't give a fuck abt him) and like. the number of times charlie has fallen asleep on micah on the couch or the times micah has tucked charlie in when he crashes at his house. and charlie subconsciously referring to the foster house as 'home' and charlie being the only person micah could ever be open with... ohh my god they make me sick

BUT back on topic. charlie isnt even being super distant, he's just not being as affectionate but its so abnormal micah's like "wtf" and confronts him, not wanting to lose the one person he has, the one thing in like he's so selfishly wanted. charlie is stuttering a bunch and trying to figure out what to say, because he cant tell anymore if micah likes him romantically but he's saying all this stuff about how he doesn't wanna lose charlie, and charlie stutters through telling him he likes him and-- as charlie's trying to explain, micah just realizes "I rlly love him" and charlie's stuttering comes to a pause as he's trying to figure out what to say and micah just... kisses him.

i imagine it's both of their first kisses, maybbeeee charlie kissed someone once in like middle school? but it's the first time there's ever been an actual emotional connection for either of them. sparks just fly. micah has never had someone to be so open with, weak around, and charlie has never had someone who genuinely Wanted him, who cared about him so personally. it's just. they don't even need to say anything. they just kiss each other and hug and lay down on the couch (this would def be nighttime when rosie and the twins (micah's siblings) are asleep) and just cuddle and kiss and giggle into each others faces . its so sweet and fluffy and charlie 100% cries

then. they wake up in the morning in each others arms and continue their morning routine. make breakfast, wake up the kids, charlie walks them to school then walks to the highschool, micah drives off for work, and they see each other again that evening.

sorry im yapping sm they make me SO SICK THEYRE SO !!!!!! EVERYTHINGG OH MY GODDD <33333 honestly most of what we think about them is. so fucking angsty like idk how much I've talked about charlie's jumping by the socs or what happens after charlie goes to college but... ugh. they mean so much to me they make me sickkkk

[nerd-space]

here we go again i'm thinking about chris with a dad bod 😩😩

i'm sure he enjoys sweet treats and maybe he put sum chub on his tummy and he got a bit insecure, idk abt you but i'm a really touchy person i NEED to have a hand on my partner at all times

patting, rubbing, poking, you name it i do it 😊

maybe he gets a bit self conscious when you touch his tummy and makes a bad comment abt it WTF DID YOU JUST SAY CHRIS??

sorry for yapping so much in your inbox i just really need to share my thoughts with someone 😔

Chris has an awful sweettooth 😭😭😭

i also think he doesnt focus on his stomach when he works out he just wants the arm strength 💅

SleeperBuild!Chris with some tummy makes me drool everywhere

thinking anout watching his strong forearm veins popout while hes grabbbing at your hair while you suck his thick dick and he's just sinking into the bed/his gaming chair ?!2&;929;

grabbing his love handles to drag him closer in missionary so he gets the point that you're obsessed with his pudge and hes just fucking you silly and moaning while your nails leave marks in his tummy and hips..

[johnslittlespoon]

okay listen feral bikerider gale/past catching up to him/etc etc etc anon here and can I just say. thank you. I’m not overly interested in the actual violence or gang-shit or whatever. when I first read about the bikerider au all I could think about was sons of anarchy (idk if you’ve watched it, but I watched three seasons with my dad and it’s all just. gang conflict after gang conflict after gang conflict with some romance sprinkled on top and that’s not. really my thing) and I was not into it. at all. then your yapping (affectionate) converted me. hearing that it won’t be all weapon smuggling and, idk, drugs or smth is actually so reassuring lol

and!!! obviously it’s your fic/au, I’m definitely not here to try to influence you in any way whatsoever!!! I’m super excited to read it no matter what because your writing is just. lovely. I check in pretty much every morning like I’m reading the papers lmao

doing something semi-stupid in your past feels like kind of on brand for everyone, even though it might not be illegal for most. and maybe it wasn’t illegal for Gale, either, bro I am not a very good writer, I’ll leave the plotting to someone else.

but I’ll always love the idea of Gale being a little feral. or a lot feral. like John getting hurt in a bikerider au tickles my brain the same way John punching a German guard in canon centric fics does. Nevermind the guard, I just need the fallout. the angsty fallout.

John and Gale coming back home, and Gale sitting him down in the bathroom to very, very carefully patch him up (and, listen, the other guys probably just roughed him up a little. he probably got away with minor bruises and some scrapes), and Gale being insanely worried that he has scared John. John on the other hand is worried for Gale, because what if it happens again? What if the police finds out? John being worried that he somehow messed up.

and, don’t get me wrong. I wouldn’t mind reading feral gale beating the shit out of people. It’s just not something I want to read a full fic of.

finally, because I just need to add this, too: Gale’s knuckles being split and bleeding and John so very carefully cleaning them up, pressing gentle kisses to the cuts when he has to scrape the dried blood up to get it properly clean. Gale not being sure what he did to deserve John, being so sweet and gentle and caring.

okay, over and out 🫡 sorry for not being that clear in the other ask, I blame. idk, sleep deprivation. and sorry for making this so long, idk what I’m on about half the time and my meds are doing shit to my brain. I love your blog and your writing just. makes my fucking days. I’d wait forever for the next chapter of dog coded Bucky ❤️

YIPPIEE more leaving!bikeriders au >:) hii i meant to get back to this SO long ago, feels like good timing now with the bikeriders theatre day approaching! i'm assuming you're the anon from this post <3

i have THOUGHTS. aka this got lengthy oops, shocker. a bit of plotting and then like 2k words of drabble below the cut lmfaoo

the proper drabble will be further down, but first of all, very big agree!! and relieved i'm not the only one who feels this way omg. i haven't watched SOA for this reason specifically– i just don't have much interest in the conflict/violence–heavy plot stuff (which is ironic considering i'm excited for the bikeriders movie, but i think it's pretty clear that's because of the lovely cast lol since i don't care for bikes/cars in the slightest oops). HONOURED that my yapping converted you tho LOL i swear if something is character focussed, it can make 99% of topics at least somewhat appealing!

and please don't worry omg i don't feel influenced/pressured etc, i loveee bouncing ideas and brainrot back and forth for my aus, it's sm fun and i love trying to incorporate things other people like/suggest when i can!! <3 but omg i will weep thank you so much wtf?? :'))

for sure; even the most stoic/'put together' characters surely have done some not very bright things in their lives. i'm toying with a couple backstories for gale to establish what might catch up to him or cause conflict, but i'm gonna wait to decide until i see the movie because i have a feeling i'll get some good inspo from benny's story!

honestly it's the part i'll have to put the most effort into really thinking out in terms of plot to make it flow naturally, because all the relationship focussed things kinda write themselves as i brainrot. but i'm 99% sure i'm gonna write the fic from john's pov because it'll keep a lot of gale a mystery to the readers as well, and therefore save me from having to flesh out certain things until necessary lmfaoo

and yeah!! it's not always the events themselves that hit the hardest– it's the fact that the character could be feral enough for them to happen in the first place, and it's the outcome/fallout that's most fun to write/read (to me).

feral gale is so fun to explore in general because of how different it is to most of what we're shown of him in mota, so it's like a challenge to keep him feeling in character while also picking out the little parts of him that could be pushed to be that way. and of course the classic whump of the one person gale cares about and tries so hard to protect getting hurt because of him? endless angst possibilities.

i dig what you said, about john 'just' being roughed up a little, because i think with whatever backstory i end up forming, it's not like the 'bad guys' are gonna be some mastermind criminals extorting gale for something life or death lol. it's probably gonna be a bunch of rough and tumble biker men with some long lasting beef between their clubs, hitting gale where they know it'll hurt the worst: a loved one.

i bet you anything (depending on how plotting goes LOL) that they don't actually even intend to mess john up to the extent they do; i bet john runs his mouth and makes some sorta escape attempt because as terrified as he is, all he can think about is how gale's gonna obviously track him down and he's more worried about what the guys are planning to do to gale when he shows up. in his naive mind, if he can get out and get to a phone or something, he can stop everything.

ofc the escape attempt is futile because it's one gangly college kid vs a couple of grown ass men, and john gets banged up in the process, seeing as being tackled to the ground with your wrists bound behind your back doesn't leave you with anything to protect your face from concrete with, and maybe then he gets a solid fist to the face to scare him out of pulling anymore shit (it sure works).

and just the act of taking john/putting him danger alone would have gale ready to wring these men out by their necks, but when he shows up and sees his baby bleeding? and he can't tell how bad he's hurt, from where he's lurking around the corner scoping out the situation? he'd see red and be pretty dang close to saying fuck it and going in there without a plan, but the fear of john getting hurt in the process would stop him, and he doesn't feel like going down for murder.

somehow he picks off the guys one by one with a generous amount of flying fists and y'know, maybe a bit of knife–work if necessary, idk, future plotting lol, and tells them they're good as dead if they pull anything like this again. that the club will be keeping an eye out for them, that they're a buncha cowards, and they can come talk to him face to face like men, next time. you get it.

and then finally, obligatory wound care ofc <3 easily top three tropes ever ugh. gale gets john the fuck out of there and to the safety of his truck, methodical and vigilant, and only then does his guarded expression drop, and his hands are shaking just as hard as john's are when he cups john's face in his hands to look him over. john gives him a shell–shocked "'m fine, gale" and hates how guilty gale looks, because there's not even the tiniest part of john that blames gale for any of it; john knew what he was getting into (to an extent) with gale.

but regardless, gale's shaken up, terrified by how much worse things could've gone and how much danger john could've been in, but also terrified of how deeply he feels for john; probably some backstory there about gale seeing someone he loved get hurt, or almost get hurt, swearing he'd never bring someone into his life again because of it, etc, and then in waltzes stubborn, loud–mouthed john egan.

but selfishly (or what he feels is selfish), gale's also terrified that this might be the final nail in the coffin for john. he knows he's not the easiest to be with (even though john thinks the exact same thing about himself lol silly boys) and he knows john's more patient than he deserves, and could find someone his own age with a normal life in a heartbeat with his sweet disposition and charming pretty boy looks. and he knows john's well within his rights to walk away from their relationship now, to be scared of the future, to decide it's too much, and part of gale would be relieved to not have to worry, even if he'd miss john like he's lost half of himself.

it's real quiet when they're back home and john's sitting on the bathroom counter, gale between his legs, patching up his face so so gently, as if each brush of a cotton swab is an apology. both of them have lots to say but neither know how to say it; john hates knowing gale's probably shouldering all the blame and he doesn't know how to reassure him in a way that'll get through to him, but he can't handle the silence. probably makes a weak joke about how "y'shoulda seen the other guy" and doesn't even get a smile out of gale.

ends up wrapping his legs around gale's hips to pull him closer but just gets a huffed out, frustrated "john" as gale swats his ankles away, and it's not that john's trying to make light of what happened, he just doesn't know how to talk about something like that, regardless of how good he and gale have gotten at communicating.

john probably gets a bit frustrated, because gale’s already so protective over him as is, which he likes, but now gale’s treating him like glass, like he’s scared to hurt him further just by touching him, and john does not like that. it feels like progress undone, like he's back at the beginning of their relationship when gale wouldn't let him in or open up to him or trust that he was capable of making his own decisions.

so when gale's done bandaging him up with practiced, meticulous hands, john doesn't give gale time to react, just slides off the counter and snatches the little first aid kit from his hands and says "okay, your turn." and it's obvious gale wants to protest, but john catches him so off guard that he stunned into silence, lets john guide him until he's leaning against the counter.

john's hands still tremble when he takes gale's hands in his, and he tries to steady them because he doesn't want gale to see how freaked out he is, but he diligently cleans away the blood around his knuckles, feeling gale's eyes on him the whole time but not looking away from his task, scared he'll shatter the moment if he does.

if he were to look up though, he'd see gale's watching him in complete awe, struck by the fiercest wave of adoration, drawing a blank while he tries to search for what he could've possibly done in this life or another to have someone like john come (crashing, stumbling, tornado–ing) into his life.

and if we wanna make it extra yowch–y and sappy and feelings heavy: as john's brushing his lips over the cuts, dusting featherlight kisses across his knuckles, john's throat goes tight and he feels his own overwhelming rush of emotions and his heart thumps and he blurts out: "i love you."

it's the first time one of them says it. and it’s a disguised i love you even so. i love you despite. i love you anyway. i love you because. months worth of reassurances wrapped into three words, and even with what john's just gone through, he's still scared when it slips out, looks up at gale with wide, searching eyes, trying to gauge whether he's overstepped or said the wrong thing.

gale's just trying to catch his breath, feeling like the wind's been knocked out of him by the admission. half of him wants to shake his head, gently push john's hands away, tell him "no you don't, hun." a tiny part of him wants to be cruel about it, to laugh the honesty off and ensure john will walk out that door far, far away from the mess that gale is, and not turn back, safe from harm.

but the other half of him, the half that holds his heart, evidently, has him cupping john's open, sincere face in his hands, looking down into bright, fearful, hopeful blue eyes, and murmuring "i love you more."

and john blushes as hard as he did the first time they'd kissed, as hard as he did the first time he was laid out in gale's bed, as if he and gale haven't said a million things much more fluster–inducing since they met. gets all shy, pouts, looks down and mumbles "that's not fair," and that finally gets the first smile out of gale all day, maybe even a breath of a laugh.

they love each other your honour </333

this got way out of hand but what else is newwww i'm so weak for these two. so so weak. i keep saying it but MAN i'm so excited to write this fic this summer omg :')

and DON'T BE SORRY!! it's so chill omg, you were perfectly clear (but i'm glad you elaborated and gave me an excuse to yap about them some more hehehe) and never apologize for long messages, i loveee reading the brainrot and hearing ur thoughts and getting to brainrot back. and thank you AGAIN sobs 😭💗 that makes MY days and ur way too kind fml. i hope the wait hasn't been too long LOL on the chapters AND a response to this ask!! tysm again mwah

[electricalcheese]

hi chat any1 remember when i got obsessed with toa and mostly apollo (okay maybe not i didn't make art of him much on tumblr but i WAS obsessed he was the only character i thought about)..

because i'm here with a fanart of him after like.. *checks notes* 8 months??? wowie

oh yeah i missed toapril.. woops.. also wtf i almost forgot to add the acne 💔💔💔 yeah idk how to dtaw it but i tried to incorporate it

wow coming back to pjo makes me yap more like i used to

also ummm art improvement under cut i think?? idk i'm proud of how car i've come :33