#idk why that was the caption i wrote but im not changing it now.

[mizzmellos]

They're just boy best friends, your honor.

[velveteencurtains]

evermore first impressions!

willow - GIRL EUEJDNSKJDJEJD LOST IN YOUR CURRENT LIKE A PRICELESS WIINE!!!!! TAKE MY HAND!!! WRECK MY PLANS!!! THATS MY MAN!!!!!! girl this is so fcuking GOOD! gonna be 100% honest the 1 is a better album opening but this is so fucking good you guys. life was a willow and it bent right to your wind!!! ID COME BACK STRONGER THAN A 90’S TREND???? EVERY BAIT AND SWITCH WAS A WORK OF ART??? SHES SICK SHES REALLY SICK I SWEAR. the way she sings “that’s my man!” yes ma’am yes ma’am!!!!!! the parallel between “I knew you stepping on the last train” and then “you know my train could take you home” SHES SICK YOUR HONOR SHES SICK

champagne problems - okay we love a piano opener. i’m so conflicted on what i think this song is gonna be about. MORE TRAIN LYRICS GIRLIE. this really is this is me trying’s older, sadder sister. “our group of friends/don’t think we’ll say that word again” MA’AM??? SHE WOULD HAVE MADE SUCH A LOVELY BRIDE SUCH A SHAME SHES FUCKED IN THE HEAD??????? IM LOSIJG MY FUCKIJG MIND. taylor and joe wrote this together? we love a couple with shared mental illnesses

gold rush - jack antonoff do not let me down. GIRL THE HARMONIES AT THE VERY BEGINNING JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE. okay I can definitely see what they meant by this song being about being lost in a daydream, the juxtaposition between the chorus and the verses is AMAZING. this is just gorgeous’s older sister huh???? “ocean blue eyes/looking in mine/i feel like i might sink and drown and die” and “eyes like sinking/ships on waters/so inviting/i almost jump in”

‘tis the damn season - i can’t tell if i want this song to be christmassy or not. OH SO THIS IS JUST HOLIDATE. TAYLOR JUST WATCHED HOLIDATE AND WROTE A SONG ABOUT IT. this is a continuation of tim mcgraw, argue with the wall. NO BC TIM MCGRAW IS ABOUT LIKE A LOVE FROM HIGH SCHOOL AND THIS IS LIKE COMING HOME FROM COLLEGE AND REUNITING WITH THEM BC YOURE BOTH DEPRESSED AND LONELY

tolerate it - jesus christ i’m not emotionally ready for this. STOP THIS IS THE PRELUDE TO BETTER MAN. LIKE BETTER MAN IS AFTER SHES ALREADY LEFT BUT THIS IS BEFORE WHEN SHES STUCK AND KNOW SHE DESERVES BETTER BUT SHE JUST TAKES IT IM GONNA CRYYYYYYYYYYY. okay but i’m imagining the babe music video and that whole of like the doting housewife who gave up everything for her husband and does everything to make him happy but he just does not appreciate it at all and he doesn’t see how much his indifference hurts her. @taylorswift mv now. honestly? loved that but as a track 5 it’s pretty weak

no body, no crime - I PREDICTED THIS WAS GONNA BE MY TOP SONG ON THE ALBUM LETS SEE IF I’M RIGHT. GIRL THE SIRENS AND “HE DID IT” AS THE FIRST LINES?? THEN THE COUNTRY INSTRUMENTAL??? TAYLOR HAS FINALLY GIVEN ME A GOOD OLD FASHIONED “MURDERED MY CHEATING HUSBAND” COUNTRY SONG HELL YESSSSSSS. OH THE WIFE IS MISSING???? NOT GONE GIRLLLLLLLLL MISS TAYLOR CHANNELING AMY DUNNE HERE!!!!! OH SHUT UPPPPPP SHES A LESBIAN WITH ESTE’S SISTER AND THEY COVERED UP HIS MURDER AND NOW THEYRE GONNA LESBIAN TOGETHER MISS TAYLOR

happiness - okay miss happiness you’ve got a lot to live up to but let’s do this. NOT THE MIRRORBALL PARALLEL “i was dancing when the music stopped” and “when no one is around, my dear/you’ll find me on my tallest top toes/spinning in my highest heels, love” NOT THE IDEA OF CHANGING YOURSELF JUST TO KEEP SOMEONE BY YOUR SIDE IM GONNA SOB taylor please stop this i cant emotionally handle any of this. girl this is the prelude to tolerate it which is the prelude to better man

dorothea - okay so seven’s older sister? so dorothea and whoever this singer is were besties when they were teens and then dorothea moved away and now the singer misses her former best friend and also first love and also they’re lesbians yeah it’s gay it’s so gay. taylor i’m literally begging you from the bottom of my fucking soul please give us a music video with two girls please miss swift i ask of you this one (1) thing

coney island - see i thought this was gonna be seven’s older sister when the tracklist was announced so now idk what to expect! JESUS OKAY I KNOW IT SAYS “feat. The National” IN THE TITLE BUT I FORGOT AND I GOT SCARED BY HIS VOICE. NOT A FUCKIJG CAR ACCIDENT TAYLOR IM REALLY SORRY I RRALIZE YOU ARE YOUR OWN PERSON AND I NEED TO STOP CONNECTING YOU TO HARRY BUT REALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. okay anyway here’s my theory hear me out: This is dorothea’s husband who’s confused why his high school sweetheart wife doesn’t love him anymore and why she’s now hanging out with her old high school best friend again damn that’s weird they’re like really super close that’s super odd. anyway that’s just a theory I actually don’t really know what this songs about! miss swift is too smart for me

ivy - stop this song is so sweet!!!!!! i feel like this is getaway car’s sister! i need to stop doing that i know it gets annoying but really honestly it is! NO NO NO THIS IS DOROTHEA’S PERSPECTIVE WHEN SHE HAS AN AFFAIR WITH HER HS BESTIE AND HER HUSBAND STARTS TO FIND OUT GUYS IVE FIGURED IT OUTTTTTTT. WAIT WAIT WAIT THE HS BESTIE IS FROM NO BODY NO CRIME AND DOROTHEA IS ESTE’S SISTER GUYS IVE FIGURED IT THE FUCK OUT YOU GUYSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I GOT IT

cowboy like me - let’s yee and let’s haw ladies and gents. WHOS SINGING????? WHOS SINGING WITH HER???? taylor shut up for a second lemme hear who tf this is. AM I CRAZY OR IS THIS JOE???? i’m probably dumb. but am i? why can i not at all remember what joe’s voice sounds like rn. is that joe??? im so confused. maybe i’m super dumb and it’s really obvious and i’m just fucking stupid. it’s probably not joe it’s probably some country legend that everyone else knows bc they grew up yeeing and hawing and i’m but a wee city slicker but i’m gonna hold onto this stupid theory that it’s joe singing with her until someone proves me wrong later. also this song is fucking gorgeous where’s my cowboy hat not wearing one while listening to this song makes me feel sacrelige. okay wait tay and aaron wrote this one is it aaron? i’m sorry taylor i don’t listen to the national you can hate me if you want

long story short - god the production on this slaps!!!!! and the idea of being hurt before and then finding your love and being all about them and not even caring abt what happened before!!!!! god i’m gonna cry i’m gonna cry. NO MORE KEEPING SCORE NOW I JUST KEEP YOU WARM?????? taylor really said “oh you’re not in love and i’m gonna make you feel like SHIT ABOUT IT” taylor pls a petition to let us say “BITCH” after the last line so it’s “i survived...bitch!” okay pls and thank you

marjorie - oh is this about taylor’s grandma :(((( i knew she used her name but this feels like it’s really all about her. babey. this is so sweet. taylor i love you

closure - okay the opening??? slaps! literally! okay the production of this is interesting! okay i’m like trying to figure out who this is about....who cares this is so good. oh my god the distortion??? it just underlines the anger of it all so perfectly and i love

evermore - exile hive let’s GOOOO. please be an exile pt 2 pls be an exile pt 2. so odd to me because, as a whole, this actually feels like a way more happy and optimistic album than folklore did, yet the title comes from the line “i had a feeling so peculiar/that this pain would be for/evermore”. OKAY BON IVERRRRRR. the violence of the dog days? that’s my next instagram caption thanks taylor. NOT A DUET SECTION AGAIN LIKE IN EXILE TAYLOR PLEASE I CANT HANDLE THISSSSSSS. “we always walked a very thin line” AND “is there a line that we could just go cross?” THE PARALELLELLLLRJSNDBBD. I’m gonna die for this I really think. okay so she ends it on this pain wouldn’t last evermore so that’s good

overall? this is a masterpiece. miss swift has done it again. folklore aoty 2021 and evermore aoty 2022. no body, no crime is really THAT BITCH. i need a mv miss swift! okay bye gonna go cry over this

update: after listening all night i feel like i need to point out that i’m stupid and thought este was the mistress and the singer was the wife when in fact ESTE is the wife in no body, no crime. SO addendum to my theory: este and dorothea were besties in hs then dorothea left and got married and so did este but este’s hubby cheated so then este’s friend murders him and she’s cool w it, then dorothea and her husband move back home and este and dorothea reconnect and realize their long hidden feelings for one another, dorothea leaves her husband and she and este run away together

ANOTHER UPDATE: ‘TIS THE DAMN SEASON IS FROM DOROTHEA’S POINT OF VIEW!!!!!!!! WHEN SHE COMES HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS AND SHES SINGING TO ESTE!!!!!! CJNECNSJSNNDN

[dear-space-cadet]

al horford sleeper agent

—————

anyway by now ive told basically everyone i care about but i had a life changing experience over the weekend. n it sounds dumb as shit but i met a real life dude who was basically a clone of nick from franz. weird hours. guess this is a thread

before we start i want to say i havent thought about franz in weeks. theyve gone away on their own finally but really i think my old obsessions just get replaced every few years and maybe it was my hard work in therapy or my new obsession with rap or

maybe it was just a realization or me growing up and maturing or something but i dont even want to work on my favorite fanfics anymore or anything. it’s just odd. i think im changing

and i don’t think about how my former favorite band members are doing or worry about them or check their socials n it feels really good. but i know there probably is or probably will be a replacement

ok that was a tangent. if they were replaced by anything they were replaced by new friends and the NBA. so there’s the exposition of this story sorted

anyway back to the weekend. the sleeper agent invited me to lunch. and that was the catalyst. god people are being so loud in here let me go to the art library

anyway i just kind of realized "huh i guess there's more out there." i went to lunch n shit. WE went to lunch n shit. stopped caring so much about my math homework. let myself be dumb and in love

that’s a very human thing. lunch. he spilled his stupid chipotle burrito all over his stupid bright green celtics jacket

he’s from italy. never even stepped foot in a chipotle. immediately clowned himself. some world we live in

we hung out all weekend. we went to lunch like two more times and we went to dinner. there was this big threat of leaving looming over my head the whole time. i made him walk like a mile on crutches and i feel very bad about it

i don’t know what’s wrong with him. it’s somewhere between a basketball injury and a chronic disability. either way that just made me feel even more emotionally attached to him. i never saw him without the celtics jacket

it was so cold that weekend. or maybe i just didn’t bring the right jacket. if he were a gentleman he would have offered me the celtics jacket. i didnt even hug him goodbye

and then of course he went back home. theres a million girls all over his instagram comments all the time. theres nothing special about me. he doesn't want to talk. i wrote my ap psych notes in green yesterday bc i was so in love with that stupid celtics jacket

im a sixers fan. the sixers and the celtics have been rivals forever. it was about to be war, except i want to move to boston. but really i want to move to dc. i wish the whole world was philly. things would be less complicated

im in love with a celtics jacket. a celtics jacket. of all teams. and i cant even talk to my basketball friends about it because they think im dumb shit for falling for some celtics fan with a million girls all over his instagram comments all the time

im not like those girls. i don’t think im like those girls. but i definitely exactly am

i have an economics test in fifteen minutes. i think one day ill drown in the atlantic ocean.

the test wasnt that bad. i thought about writing this the entire time. i would just zone out and stare and think about the phrase ‘al horford sleeper agent’

because he has to be. why else would someone put a diehard sixers fan right in front of a diehard celtics fan who looks exactly like the guitarist of their middle school favorite band

in reality i should be calling him a celtics sleeper agent because the whole point is that al horford is a sleeper agent for the celtics. but i hate al horford so i guess it’s more funny to include him in the title

i mean how can one player change so drastically like that? al horford was benched for the first time since his rookie season, like, two weeks ago after being traded to the sixers. how does that happen? why *wouldn’t* he be playing badly so his old friends win the title?

al horford’s gotta be retiring in like, three years, tops. he’s working for the celtics, i know it. and my sleeper agent is trying to convert me to a celtics fan

i understand why people make jokes, though. it’s a very human thing to want to go home. al horford just wants to go home. he lived in boston for however many years let me look it up

god whatever it was only three years i thought it was like eleven that just ruined my point

back to the matter at hand though that’s all we’re trying to do. we all just want to feel at home. we’re all just these little things trying to connect somehow. sometimes we are more desperate than others

i think im pretty desperate right now. sometimes i sit in my bedroom and im like damn when do i get to go home? but im home

i didn’t even want to leave dc. it was all star break and there wasn’t even basketball on. so there i was, in basketball purgatory, wizards territory for some god forsaken reason, losing sleep over a celtics fan and not wanting to go home

and when i say i was losing sleep you better believe me. i was so excited to wake up in the morning that i didn’t want to fall asleep. i wanted to be awake forever, endless, running through the city

i’ll get there soon enough. it’ll be with different people. college, yknow. all that. but sometimes i feel like certain things can’t be replaced.

and im acting like a different person lately. im using my phone at red lights just so i can check for a message from the sleeper agent. it’s always one word responses

yes. ok. maybe. some shit like that. a haha every once in a while. he’s not interested and i should stop trying

and then, INEVITABLY, i send something stupid back, a photo of my hand on the wheel or something, and i get left on read

and i know im stupid for it. everyone i know is screaming at me “disco, you’re dumb shit” but i just want to believe for a minute that im loved, im special

I want to feel like someone out there cares about me that isn’t obligated to, yknow? my mom can say she loves me all she wants but it doesn’t feel as good as some italian celtics fan saying it

some hot italian celtics fan mind you

even if he wasn’t hot or italian it would be nice. and actually it would be better if he liked like, ANY other basketball team

except maybe the knicks

but whatever. main point: i know im dumb shit and should stop trying. but it feels good to feel like if i keep trying maybe i’ll be wanted

sleeper agent is just one of those people tho. he’s magnetic and everyone always wants to be around him. dumb as hell in the most charming way ever. my friends are still all making fun of me

i started crying in a pizza place the other night because even the CONCEPT of italy sent me over the edge. i need to stop before i

wait what’s the word

i need to stop before i immortalize him? no, no

i need to stop before i deify him. soon enough he’s going to be a new canonical character in my head and i’ll start making up legends and stories to myself

we barely knew each other. if i deify him i’ll start telling people he offered me the celtics jacket when it was cold out. he’ll become a perfect gentleman. and he wasnt. he was just some stupid hot italian boy in a bright green jacket

im not going to deify him. it won’t happen. but i love the color green. i always say i love yellow more but i think that’s passed. i wear a green ring on my right ring finger every day. im not going to deify him and i still hate the celtics

overall, the celtics are winning the rivalry. i don’t think the sixers have ever truly been “great,” at least outside of philly. maybe allen iverson. wilt chamberlain. dr j? theyve never had like, a dynasty. idk. i don’t think you’d be able to get a sixers jacket in italy.

it’s his birthday today. i should probably text him. i should probably stop thinking about him. that’s just dumb shit, disco youre better than this what happened to a little self confidence every now and again

sure lets say external validation isnt necessary but also i think that’s something the mindfulness crowd made up to sell more planners and tote bags in 2011. it feels good to be wanted

never waste all your time on it sure. know youre still worth it even when you have no friends and there are a million girls all over his instagram comments. but it does feel good to hear “goodness disco i like how much you like the philadelphia 76ers”

my friends are all making fun of me for being on some romeo and juliet shit because he’s literally from verona and he’s a celtics fan and im a sixers fan god damn it disco why does this always happen

i never even read romeo and juliet but i saw the dreamworks adaptation so i guess ive got the story relatively right i know they die in the end. the gnomes shatter into little pieces i think

anyway tangents aside the sixers won tonight. philly is lit up green. why the hell is philly lit up green? the eagles were done like three months ago and the flyers are orange. why is philly lit up green

oh god, he just snapped me. a zoomed in photo of himself with caption that says “76ers” with like five exclamation points

here we go again, everybody

wish me luck

[peachrogers]

my summation + overall thoughts of avengers: endgame

including: what i found wrong with endgame and why i am currently refusing to acknowledge that it happened.

okay i wrote this a while ago but after i never actually got around to posting it so here it is. 

first off,, i will once again introduce myself since this account is fairly new. hello, my name is mackenzie, call me mackenzie, or zie or mack or whatever you want. this was originally to be my main acc after i deactivacted all my old tumblrs because i planned to start fresh on tumblr again and after watching endgame for the second time last wednesday, this account became a marvel acc strictly so !! yeah follow me lets be friends !! message me whenever if you wanna talk or cry or anything. 

to put it bluntly,, endgame fucking sucked. 

endgame was meant to tie everything together. endgame was meant to be this great movie to sum everything up and tie it all together and to just make it make sense in other words.

there was so much hype surrounding endgame, so much pressure, so much excitement. 

in my opinion? the joint effort of the writers and the directors managed to ruin it all. they managed to take a movie that was supposed to do so much for the mcu, to tie everything together as a final conclusion to this infinity saga and they blew it all up.

endgame wasn’t a horrible movie, but there were multiple parts that i (and multiple others i know of) did not like and i will be going over it in this post.

it’s not just because of steve’s ending, which i know, i know, i’ve bitching and crying about that for a while on this account. it’s more than just steve’s ending.

this post is a little all over the place but i’ll try to keep my thoughts together the best that i can.

just a disclaimer: UNDER THE CUT I WILL BE TALKING IN DEPTH ABOUT THE EVENTS OF AVENGERS: ENDGAME AND THIS WILL INCLUDE MAJOR SPOILERS ABOUT THE MOVIE SO PLEASE BE WARY. (if you haven’t, seriously where the fuck have you been) BUT IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN ENDGAME AND DO NOT WISH TO HAVE IT SPOILED PLEASE SCROLL PAST THIS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

okay here we go !! so i made posts before about this but this is gonna just be a big long post about EVERYTHING and i’ll explain everything and why endgame sucked. 

originally i had decided to go through scene by scene and talk about each scene but i mean, that’s not really the point of this post and frankly, doing that would probably make this post longer than i want it to be. so i will be focusing on the important scenes. the ones i think are most important to point out and talk about.

as i mentioned above the cut, it’s not just about steve. i know my user is peachrogers and steve rogers has always been my fave avenger. but its more than just steve’s ending and i’ll get into that as we get to it.

i used a transcript while writing this just to help me completely recall everything as it actually was since i don’t consider my memory completely reliable so i linked it if anyone else wants to look at it.  

and again, as i mentioned above, i don’t hate everything about endgame. there were parts of endgame i did like and enjoy. tony and nebula playing paper football for example, i thought that scene was very endearing and adorable and carol coming to save them really made me happy. 

but at the same time, there were scenes i did not enjoy. and i will be mainly going depth on those scenes since i kinda wanted to just summarize and explain and captalize on why endgame failed at doing the job it was meant to do in tying together these 22 mcu films released in the past 11 years.

so starting at the beginning of the film, after they find thaos and thor chops off his head and they have a five year time skip, we see steve, in a group therapy session. 

where steve once again brings up the love of his life and how everyone has to move on. which SPOILER ALERT he doesn’t. this scene, when i first watched i was kinda like whatever, but watching it the second time and watching it now(or even thinking on it), it makes me SO SO mad. pretty sure they kept this scene bc one of the directors is in it. this scene also just makes steve contradict himself since he goes on about how important it is for to move on and yet he just doesn’t even follow his own advice in the end and it aggravates me which i will get into later on.

so skipping to after scott comes out of the time machine van and then steve goes to visit natasha. tbh everytime i watch this scene with natasha and steve, it always just breaks my heart because of the whole:

you know, i keep telling everyone they should move on and… grow. some do. but not us.

(there steve goes again just contradicting himself:(()

and

we both need to get a life. 

you first.

and i remember reblogging a gif set of nat and steve with the same caption and i just :( bc of where they end up in the end and it’s just its really sad. 

seeing tony and pepper with morgan and the fact that tony has finally achieved a level of normalcy where he has his own life with his wife and his child, it’s really nice to see. he definitely deserves it. and i completely understand tony shutting down steve, nat, and scott because he doesn’t want to risk everything especially if it doesn’t work and he ends up losing it. and i totally understood that.

the diner scene where nat, steve, and scott go to talk to bruce about time travel. first off, i just wanna point off how annoying that scene was ?? especially the part with the kids and them not wanting a pic with scott and apparently they only kept that part in bc one of the kids was one of the director’s kids?? there’s just so much wrong with it. 

and now i move on to the great marvel cinematic universe version of time travel. which in itself really hardly makes any sense whatsoever since the directors and the writers both contradict each other on how it works. if you’re going to put time travel in your movie, i really feel like everyone should be on the same page on how it works but i mean, that’s just me. 

it took me a little bit to understand it bc what the fuck. 

the scene where clint,rhodey, bruce, nebula, and scott are discussing how time travel works and rhodey is just naming off all these time movies where time travel works the way that i see it as working(where your past completely changes your future/butterfly effect/chaos theory) and bruce and nebula basically debunk the whole thing and explain it as how changing your past doesn’t change your future and all the whole thing is just bullshit if you ask me. it’s so hard to understand.

okay im not here to argue about time travel. but let me just give some perspective. for me personally, i just see time travel to work like it did in life is strange because it makes more sense. if you change something in the past, that would directly impact your future. if you go in the past and prevent someone from dying, that would not just change the fact that they didn’t die but other factors would be affected too.

and when they brought in the alternate timelines and the “multiverse” it just made things so much more complicated for me.

and i have tried to educate myself more to understand it, i’ve read through multiple posts on the whole time travel thing and i’ve rewatched movies as well to try and understand.

i guess the biggest thing that didn’t sit well with me is just that the directors and writers WHO YOU WOULD ASSUME would bring some clarity and insight on the matter really just brought more confusion and only contradicted each other and i do Not Like it at all. 

but i mean who cares about what we want ? it obviously doesn’t mean shit to them.

moving on.

uh lebowski thor idk at first i really wasn’t into it and i was kinda like wtf but i mean i’ve kinda come to be cool with the change in character. and apparently chris hemsworth was really into it so idk to each their own. 

and just for the record: i think we all know that Noobmaster69 is deadpool

also i fucked loved the america’s ass joke but i’m pretty sure everyone did. 

okay moving on to stony going to the camp lehigh in the 1970s. really i just want to address the scene where steve hides in peggy’s office. you see on her desk that one picture of steve and the picture of her kids and legiT PEGGY WAS RIGHT THERE IN THE OTHER OFFICE HOW DID SHE NOT SEE STEVE WHAT THE FUCK

god idk just thinking about how it was the 1970s and she still thinks about steve who tbh she hardly knew, especially if you compare him to idk daniel sousa ?? and steve saw the picture of her kids and he still was like lol yeah not moving on.

natasha dying okay yeah that was hard to watch. especially since she got nothing for it. tony gets a whole funeral with everyone and yeah ig she got that one moment with the five of them talking about trying to bring her back but that was it and i hate that. natasha deserved more love more attention more recognition way way more than what she got.

ON YOUR LEFT

okay idk how people heard steve’s avenger assemble when the fucker literally whispered it.

i mean it was really nice seeing everyone coming together and fighting and idk it was just everything to see the final fight against thanos. 

ALSO CAP WIELDING MJOLNIR 

tony dying, like i definitely did cry and it was sad, but in a way it was okay because he did it for them he did it for everyone. 

there was an interview with the writers who said there wasn’t a draft where tony didn’t die and i don’t doubt it because i mean, i think it was needed. i think tony needed to be the one to do it. 

and now we get to my favorite part. you know, the worst part of the movie. where steve just ruins everything. 

in the process of returning the infinity stones, steve decides to create an alternate timeline with “peggy” and live out his life with her in that timeline while actual steve of that timeline is in ice.

okay listen i was cool with the final dance, i think that was definitely needed and it would’ve been a perfect end for steve to do that and return and idk give up captain america. but instead NO THEY HAVE TO DESTROY ALL OF captain america’s character development, all of peggy carter’s character development, RUIN BUCKY AND JUST RUIN EVERYTHING THAT WASNT OKAY I AM STILL JUST SO UPSET BECAUSE FOR STEVE TO JUST THROW EVERYTHING OUT THE WINDOW AND BE WITH PEGGY IN A DIFFERENT TIMELINE ITS NOT SOMETHING STEVE WOULD DO

we all know that is not something steve would do so it just it killed me and the directors hardly even gave an explanation for it and idk its just its such a let down and im just im not okay with it and i won’t be for a while. steve has always been my favorite avenger and for him to go out like this. its so disappointing, steve rogers deserved a better ending than this. 

endgame sucked and its gonna take me a while to accept that endgame actually happened. 

[minimickzy]

TomHolland2013 posted  || Tom Holland

Request: Just something I wrote long ago 

Summary: Social Media style Imagine! Reader is in a movie with Tom and hangs out with him and the cast of Spider-Man HC. Please let me know what you think!

Characters: Tom Holland x Reader, Zendaya, Harrison, Jacob

Word count: 2200+

Warning: Fluff, soft make out 

a/n: I took this off my wattpad and changed a bit because I think I’ve grown as a writer at least a little! Infinity War has launched me back into the Marvel fandom so feel free to send in requests <3 also idk why I’m posted this so late but hey, why not?

Instagram 4:21pm July 5th

@(y/u) posted:

[picture of Tom sleeping on table]

Wake up, I want a wrap on set so I can go home! #[movie title]

TomHolland2013 and 170,693 other people liked this

17278 comments

4:31pm TomHolland2013: wow stalker much??

4:32pm (y/u): wow professorial Much?? @tomholland2013

User1: oh my god I ship it

User2: CUTE!! ❤❤❤😩

User3: agh Tom is toooooo Hot, my eyes BURN!!

______________

Instagram 2am July 7th

@TomHolland2013 posted:

[photo collection of you, Tom, and Harrison with cake smeared on faces]

Fun night out with the mates!!

@hazosterfield @(y/u)

10:34am (y/u): delete this, I look like shit!

User1: OMG (Y/N) IS SO HOT WTF SHSJSKAKAKAN

12:37pm @tomholland2013: um? Bish where? @(y/u)

User2: Um, did @tomholland2013 just call @(y/u) hot??? IM DECEASED

12:38pm @(y/u): you did not just quote a vine

5:32pm @hazosterfield: stop bickering like a old married couple!! @(y/u) @Tomholland2013

_______________

Instagram [Dm] July 13th

12:34am Tom: oh my god!

1:53am You: what?!

1:53am Tom: Tessa just shook my hand

1:54am You: I thought this was serious

3:24am Tom: I don't know what's more serious than my dog putting her paw on my hand and moving it up and down??

3:27am You: Tom it's 3:27 am go tf to sleep

8:35am Tom: I think it was a dream

8:37am Tom: I tried again this morning, She doesn't know how to do it anymore

8:43am You: 😢😢😢

________

[(y/u) is live on Instagram]

9,367 viewers July 15th 3:45 pm

"Hey guys, it's me (y/n)" you say, "and me, Tom Holland!" Tom pushed you aside to get in the shot. You laughed and shoved him over a little so you both fit in the frame. "We're on set here in uh, Toronto. It's kinda boring actually." Tom laughed. You started to read though some of the comments:

User1: LOOK AT MY PARENTS

User2: Tom please say quackson for me!!

User3: ILYSM

User4: Hi from London!

You nudged Tom, "say quackson." He shot you a gentle glare, "No, absolutely not." You gave him puppy dog eyes in a lame attempt to change his mind, "Please." "Why." "Because the viewers are asking for it.... I'll give you a peak on the cheek." He rolled his eyes, "if you want me to say it that bad.... Quackson." You smiled at him and kissed his cheek, then went back to the comments:

User1: OTPPP

User2: are they dating??

User3: AGH I WISH I WAS (Y/N)

User4: @User2 THEY SAY NO BUT I MEAN WE ALL KNOW THEY’RE LYING

User5: SHE KIISED HUS CHEEK OMG OMG JANSINSSMMAMA

You laughed and started to answer questions left by the viewers, trying to ignore the pinkish tint on both your and Toms cheeks.

[live ended]

______

iMessage July 15th

5:33pm Tom: hey

5:33pm You: what's up?

5:35pm Tom: no hi?

5:36pm You: hi, what's up?

5:36pm Tom: better 😂, and Haz and I are meeting up with Z so I was wondering if you wanted to come along?

5:36pm Tom: we could pick you up around 7ish?

5:42pm You: um, sure. What are we doing?

5:42pm Tom: idk, Z invited us over to just hang out and maybe watch a movie

5:43pm You: okay, I'll be ready

____________

Zendaya's Snapchat Story July 16th

1:32am

[video from the side, of you asleep in toms arms under a blanket while Harrison is pointing and smirking with the caption 'this is what you guys get for falling asleep after one movie' and Zendaya laughing in the background]

3:24am

[picture from front of you and Tom with Zendayas Bitmoji blowing a kiss]

7:45am

[picture of you hiding your face with one hand and flipping the camera off with the other. Your hairs a mess and you’re wearing Toms shirt from yesterday. Tom’s in the background laughing and Haz is pulling a funny face. With the caption of '(y/n) is not a morning person']

________

Interview with (y/n) (y/l/n) and Tom Holland, July 20th [cut to 6:34 minutes in]

Interviewer: "So, on Zendaya's Snapchat, 4 days ago we saw some cute sleepy cuddling snaps of the two of you. And fans want to know if your dating or what's the story behind that?"

Tom: "I mean no, we're just friends, and the story is that we were both just really tried and fell asleep."

You: "yeah, I just needed a pillow."

Interviewer: "so then that morning shot of (y/n) in your shirt... that was just..."

Tom: *chuckles* "she was just cold and spilled something on her shirt so I gave her mine and got one that I had forgot at Z's"

Interviewer: "oh so you and Zendaya then" *smirks*

Tom: "no, we're friends, nothing more."

Interviewer: "So, you two have no feelings for each other?"

Tom and You share a awkward glance

Tom: "uh..."

You: "do you mean Me- an-and Tom or Tom-"

Tom: "well I mean yeah we have a great time together. Thank you."

Tom put a hand on your back and moved you along still rambling.

__________

Instagram [Dm] July 20th

4:02pm You: That lady really grilled us, huh?

5:23pm Tom: I know right

5:32pm Tom: do you think I was too rude?

5:32pm You: no, you saved my rambling ass tho, Thanks

5:33pm Tom: don't mention it

6:18pm Tom: Z's house? 8:30ish

6:19pm You: meeting there or driving together?

6:20pm Tom: pick you up at 8

6:20pm You: 👌🏻

______

Instagram July 20th 8:37 pm

@TomHolland2013 posted:

[photo of you driving and him pulling a goofy face]

stuck in traffic with my favorite lady @(y/u)

163,827 people liked this, 12437 comment

User1: where you going?

@Zendaya: so I guess your running late than, huh?

User2: date night?

@TomHolland2013: oh yeah, whoOps. Sorry 😢 @zendaya

______________

Instagram July 20th 10:47 pm

@Zendaya posted:

[picture of Tom, Zendaya, Jacob, Harrison and you]

We're going live in ten minutes!! Playing truth or dare so give us some good ones!

462,729 people liked this, 19299 comments

___________

[Zendaya is live on Instagram]

15,682 viewers July 20th 10:58 pm

"Hey guys!" Zendaya waved to the phone and then spun it around your small circle so you all could wave. "Okay so how this is going to work, is we'll go around and ask truth or dare and then you guys pick what we do... so... yeah and I'm gonna start!"

The game was fun, viewers ate it up. You went around a few times before Zendaya clapped her hands together and said goodbye to the watchers and turned her phone off for the night. "Okay, now for the real ones." Harrison smirked. You knew it was coming but you hoped they'd just leave you alone. "Tom, truth or dare?" Jacob asked with a grin you knew too well playing at his lips, "Uh," Tom shot Harrison a nervous smile, "dare?" "Okay! well you both had to have known this was coming, but... the sexual tension is actually killing us." Zendaya said motioning to Jacob, Harrison and herself. You felt your cheeks turning beet red.

"I'd normally say just kiss, But... this time I'm thinking the classic seven minutes in heaven." Harrison pipes up. "Okay. (Y/N)," Tom stood up and put his hand out for you. You took it and pulled yourself up, shooting a glance back at the group and then let Tom pull you to a closet that was out of earshot.

Harrison came behind you and shut the door so you were now surrounded by darkness and you were trapped. "So..." Tom chuckled, "we don't have to actually do anything, but we should talk, I mean there's something here, you can't tell me you don't feel it." He trailed off almost to a whisper. "I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel it." You smiled as His hand brushed against your arm. You reached for it holding it tight in your grasp.

You reached with your other hand up to find his cheek. "Maybe... we could, you know, just to defuse the tension." You let a shaky breath. "Well I mean- I don't- we should really give them something right?" Tom said stepping closer to you. "Most definitely." You pulled yourself up to meet his lips.

It just felt right, you fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. He lightly pushed you against the wall and you put your hands in his hair, "this feel so good." "Agreed." You let out a small laugh, "Tom? Remind me why we didn't do this sooner." "I have not the slightest fucking clue." You moved your lips back his and melted in his arms. "should we tell people? The press I mean." You asked "I don't even know," Tom laughed and joined him going back into a makeout session. 

But sadly the two of you were met with the door swinging open. "So, how was it." Harrison smirked, you patted down your hair and smiled a little. Tom came out behind you and Harrison started laughing. You turned to see what was so funny and saw Tom had your lipstick smeared all over his lips and a little on his neck. You chuckled and used your thumb to wipe some of it off. When you went back to the living room Tom clapped his hands and yelled "we're official." You smiled and sat down as the others lightly cheered, this time not afraid to let his arm find its way around you.

"We're not going to release it to the press yet. We don't want or need the extra drama." You smiled. Zendaya nodded, "as long as the air is loose I'm good." And it was. Tom and You were a lot more relaxed and could exactly act on your thoughts that you used to push aside.

_________

Instagram July 26th 2:16 pm

@TomHolland2013 posted

[picture of you and Zendaya laughing at a beach]

Feels great to have such a beautiful view @(y/u) @zendaya

278,352 people liked this, 43,680 comments

User1: oh my god is Tom and Zendaya dating??

User2: @user1 Or Tom and (y/n)

User3: HOT DAMN BBY GALS

User4: ploy anyone?

User5: I wish I was Tom

_________

(y/u)'s Snapchat Story July 27th

[picture of you driving looking away in the background of Toms selfie. Caption: hacked]

[video from lap of you singing to the radio and then Turning to Tom. "Are you videoing me?!"]

[picture of you at stop light smiling at the camera. Caption: paparazzi following us for like 10 miles, we just want to eat 😢😢]

[video of you ordering food at (y/f/ff)]

[video's of the women working at the window freaking out because you and Tom are talking to them, you laugh and take a selfie with them and Tom though the window and sign a napkin for each of them]

________

"Those women were so nice." You smiled, walking into your apartment with Tom trailing behind with the food. "Yeah" Tom plopped on the couch and turned on E! News as you put your bag and keys away. "Seriously, you want to watch that?" You laughed sitting down next to him. The host was taking about the latest 'Hollywood break-up'. "I wanna know what's the drama in the entertainment world." He smiled as you rolled your eyes at him. "But the love in LA wasn't lost today," The host said, "Tom Holland and (y/n) are rumored to have a relationship behind closed doors, today Tom and (y/n) posted riding together to pick up some fast food and surprise the employees working in the drive threw window." She spoke as the video's and photos played on screen. "We're the drama" Tom smirks, and you let out a little laugh. "Can we watch a movie now?" He nods and changes to Netflix.

____________

@TomHolland2013 Instagram Story 11:56pm July 27th

[picture of you asleep on his chest. Caption: goodnight Instagram]

____________

Instagram Dm July 29th

1:47pm Tom: (y/n)

1:47pm Tom: (y/n)

1:47pm Tom: (y/n)

1:47pm Tom: (y/n)

1:47pm Tom: (y/n)

1:48pm Tom: (y/n)

1:48pm You: yes?

1:49pm Tom: I think we should tell people

1:49pm You: Its been 9 days

1:50pm Tom: so can I post a happy 10 days love, tomorrow?

1:56pm You: Really?

1:56pm Tom: yes

1:57pm You: okay... but I get to post one too.

1:57pm Tom: THANK YOU!

___________

Instagram July 30th 10:22am

@Tomholland2013 posted:

[picture of him holding you bridle style]

Happy 10 Days love @(y/u) 😘   📸// @hazosterfield

162,729 people liked this, 102,478 comments

User1: HOLY MY GOD OTS OFFICIAL

O F F I C I A L

User2: IM CRYING IN THE CLUB

User3: REPORT RED ALERT OTP OTP CANON

(y/u): ❤❤ can't believe you used this picture!

User4: I want death SKSNSNAKNS

Zendaya: congrats you crazy kids

Tomholland2013: I love this photo @(y/u) and thank you Z @zendaya

[let me know if you’d like to be tagged for marvel/peter parker or Tom holland imagines in the future]

[k-poptrash-stuff]

Secret Confession

Member: Jung Wooseok

Genre: Fluff?? Tiny tiny bit of sadness idk???

a/n: im still way deep in my pentagon feels and really wanted to do a scenario of wooseok hehe biased and ive decided to add pentagon to our scienario/reaction requests so send some in my dudess. 

~~~~~

You groaned loudly for what felt like the millionth time that evening. You let your head fall back, hitting the wall of the practice room with a dull ‘thud’. You came here whenever you wanted time to yourself. You don’t know why, you just felt more comfortable in the practice room. 

Your songbook laid on your lap, half-assed lyrics scribbled on the lines of the paper. For the past year you’ve wanted to write your own song, and you knew exactly what to write it about. You just didn’t know how to get those feelings on the damn paper. You were they type of person that needed to get their feelings out somehow. You couldn’t just bottle them up completely. 

“You look a bit stressed.”

You jumped at the sudden voice, looking to the direction it came from.You were greeted by a smiling and slightly confused Hwitaek. You assumed he had just finished up practice for Pentagon’s new comeback. You felt a small smile form at the sight of your friend. 

You had debuted as a solo artist a little over a year before Pentagon debuted. You had helped them a lot for their debut stage, remembering how nerve racking it can be. Long story short, you and the boys had grown quite the friendship. They had become like a family to you honestly. Except one. 

Jung Wooseok. 

You’ve had the biggest crush on him for the past year and it was lowkey driving you crazy. Even better, the other boys caught on very quickly. You were thankful they kept your feelings for the giant maknae a secret. 

“I’m passed stressed, my friend”, you replied with a short giggle. Hwitaek moved over to sit on the floor next to you. His eyes wondered to your songbook, pointing at it in silent permission to read the contents. Silently, you handed him the book, watching his eyes scan the page curiously. 

You sighed. “It’s just brainstorming right now”, you muttered. 

“You seem like you’re having trouble”, he joked. You groaned, hiding your face in your hands. Letting them fall to your lap, you puffed your cheeks. 

“I know exactly what I want to do”, you said, turning your head to look at him. “But I can’t seem to put my feelings into words on the damn paper.” you stated.

“These feelings wouldn’t happen to be the ones about Wooseok, would they?” he said. His tone was teasing, joking. His eyes softened when you gave a nod. His mouth formed an ‘o’ at your silent answer.  

“So are you making this song as some kind of secret confession?” Hwitaek questioned. Again, you nodded. 

 Hwitaek didn’t say anything for a moment, his gaze going from you back to the messy words in the book. 

“Would you like me to help you?” Hwitaek asked kindly with a smile. You’re eyes went wide for a moment. 

“I don’t want to bother you”, you said. You would love Hwitaek’s help, especially since he was a great composer himself in your opinion. But he was so busy preparing for their comeback, he must be exhausted. You didn’t want to add on. 

“(Y/N), I’d be happy to help”, he chuckled. “You’re like a little sister to me and I know this will stress you to the max if you work on it completely alone.” 

You couldn’t help but bluntly say, “Way past that, buddy.” 

Hwitaek rolled his eyes but didn’t fight the smile pushing on his lips. “Well, lucky I’m here to save the day. Now, You said this is about Wooseok? How exactly does he make you feel?”

Hours later, the lyrics were finally finished. As you and Hwitaek stood, you pulled him into a tight hug. “Thank you so much for your help, Hwitaek.”

He chuckled, his arms wrapping around you to return the hug. “It was no problem. I’m glad i could help.”

When you two separated, you opened the song book, your eyes reading the lyrics. Your heart was poured on the pages and with Hwitaek’s help, they were perfectly made into lyrics. Now all that needed to be done was create the music to go with it and it would be finished. You smiled up at Hwitaek. 

“I really can’t thank you enough”, you said. The two of you began to leave the room, cutting the lights off and shutting the door behind you. 

“You could tell Wooseok how you feel”, he said, nudging you lightly. 

“Not happening”, you said instantly. Hwitaek groaned. 

“Why not?” he dragged out. “He likes you too! Perfect reason to tell him.”

You shook your head. It’s not like you didn’t trust Hwitaek’s words. In fact, all the boys told you multiple times Wooseok liked you back and part of you believed he did too. But there was that bigger, more dominating part that told you he didn’t. That all you were and ever will be was a friend to him.

“My song is my confession”, you stated. “So technically, I am telling him.”

Hwitaek groaned dramatically, throwing his head back. “That doesn’t count. 

“I’ll tell him....one day.” you said. But Hwitaek knew better. He simply sighed, nodding.  

Months later and you were sitting in the waiting room of Inkigayo for your first of many stages for your new title track song. The one you wrote with Hwitaek. You had gotten so much positive feedback after the mv had dropped, so you were beyond excited to perform the comeback stages. 

You were already ready to perform, so you passed time by scrolling on your phone. You smiled as you read encouraging comments on your latest instagram post. It was a simple selfie with the caption talking about your excitement. 

Your attention was directed to the door of the waiting room when you heard shouting from behind it. You rose your brows into confusion until 10 familiar figures stumbled into the room. 

“(Y/N)!” Pentagon shouted in excitement. You laughed, feeling lighter at the presence of your closest friends. You greeted them with a smile. 

“Boys! What are you guys doing here?” you asked as they all moved around to find a place to sit. You felt your heart flip when Wooseok took a seat next to you on the small couch, his smile to you filling your stomach with butterflies. You noticed Shinwon behind him wiggling his brows suggestively. 

You let your eyes roll, sticking your tongue out at him. Wooseok looked at you confused before turning to see who you were looking at, letting out a chuckle to see Shinwon stick his tongue out right back out at you. 

“We have a few hours off so we thought we’d come and support our favorite little bean”, Hongseok said patting your head. You pushed him away from you, whining slightly. 

“I’m not little!” you stated. 

“You’re shorter than all of us here, miss five foot four”, Hwitaek pipped up. You huffed lightly, crossing your arms. It wasn’t long until everyone was in different conversations to pass time. 

“Feeling nervous?”

You turned your attention from watching Yuto and Shinwon play what seemed like an enfless game of rock-paper-scissors to Wooseok. You laughed lightly and shook your head. 

“Not really. I’m more excited than anything”, you replied. Wooseok nodded in understanding. 

“You know, your song is amazing. Even more so that you wrote it yourself”, he smiled. You felt yourself get shy suddenly when he stated this. “So, who’s it about?” 

Wooseok poked you gently, his expression twisted in curiosity. But as he said this, you swear you saw a glint of hope in his eyes. Little did you know, you were right. He was silently hoping it was written about him. He tried not to let you see it though. 

You felt your cheeks heat up, causing you to look away. “Who says it was about anyone?” 

Wooseok scoffed lightly, his poking getting more frequent. You squealed lightly as he poked a spot that tickled. He chuckled at your reaction, poking you more. “Come on. I won’t tell”, he dragged out childishly. 

“Yea, (Y/N). Who’s the special guy?” Yanan asked, though he seemed genuinely curious. 

You could see the others from the corner of your eye glancing at the two of you playing around, almost all of them wearing knowing smirks on their faces. 

“No”, you giggled. “I promise, it’s not about anyone”, you lied. Wooseok stopped poking you, raising a brow. You bit your lip, hoping he’d buy your little lie. He let out a hum, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. Before anyone else could speak up, staff were poking their heads into the room, telling you that you needed to get your mic on get get ready to get on stage. 

As you left the room, the boys said words of encouragement to you, giving you quick hugs. After some last minute checks with your mic, makeup, and stage setup, you were out and waving to fans that had showed up to watch the pre-recording. You said your small little greeting and quickly got into position. 

The Pentagon members were still in the waiting room, watching the tv eagerly. Wooseok was watching you perform with a smile, his heart jumping everytime the camera did a close up on you. The song was up beat and has a nice pop feel to it, but the lyrics you had created with Hwitaek was what really got to him. 

He was burning with curiosity to know who your inspiration was to create a song like this. Wooseok asked Hwitaek if he knew, since he helped create the song with you, but Hwitaek respected that you weren’t ready to tell Wooseok your feelings and claimed he didn’t know. 

Eventually, your performance had ended. You said your thanks and love to your fans before you took your leave. The boys met you backstage when you were getting help taking off your mic. 

“Please tell me you’ll teach me the choreo”, Hyunggu asked when they reached you. You laughed at the request, though you weren’t exactly shocked. 

“Sure, Hyunggu. I promise”, you said. 

“We have just enough time to get some lunch. Wanna come?” Yuto asked. You thought about it for a moment. You didn’t have anything scheduled until later on in the afternoon. So you shrugged. 

“Sure. But let me go change first.” you said. I’ll meet you guys outside?” 

They agreed and you split away from them. Once you grabbed your clothes you arrived in from your stylists, you went to go change. You shut the door of the room behind you, leaning against it as your eyes watered. 

Your emotions were finally getting to you. 

It all played in your mind. The look in Wooseok’s eyes when he asked you who the song was about. His smile filled with excitement to see you when he walked into the room. His laugh as he poked and teased you. Oh, you were falling deep. And it was beginning to hurt to keep your feelings concealed. 

Your vision blurred. A sad chuckled left your lips. 

“Jung Wooseok”, you began. “The way you make my heart soar and you don’t even realize it.” 

Then, the tears began to fall. 

~~~~

--waits for opinions--

-Athena ♡

[jewel-kr]

Reminiscing the friendship

So hello Tumblr... After a few yrs, i am back w a banger lol jk no . Just a few simple short-composing-alike that i’d fancy to jot down here . On the other hand, it feels so good to be back after maybe 3yrs of being inactive . hahahah sorry for that , got no time w all these growing up issues and responsibilities , ya get me right? was prolly 18y/o the last time i wrote here, On the verge of being 21st this yr hahaha .

Okay, I am not here to shittalk abt myself (prolly some other time) . Legitimately, the caption written above *Reminiscing The Friendship* . Friendship can comes in any way, any time and only the realest one would stick to your dummy freaky ass  hahaha . I got homies myself: from elementary school , middle school , college , social media acquaintances and prolly a ‘hai bye’ kinda friends hahaha . ykno, when yguys only met once and not having the chance to introduce yourself on the first place so on the second meetings yguys just ‘oh hey tsup? all good? aight nice to meet you , again’ . yup, you can relate . But yes i still got my realest blood that doesn’t wants me to die hahaha *Forever Grateful*

In this “so-called-diary” ,I  would only include one and only honorable mention for one of my 3yrs long-servant best-buddy (coming 4yrs this September) . Oh first of all, I won’t gonna include name of her cause she would notice this too . YES A SHE OMG HAHAHAHA . A funsized , adorable , lovely little buckteeth of mine (IF SHE’S TAKEN THEN SHE’S NOT MINE SO THIS CONTEXT WOULD AUTOMATICALLY CHANGED) . where were we? Right , our size is really not an issue *sobbing cause i am a huge beast standing to her*

It all started on 2013 (Actually way earlier cause i’ve been knowing her eversince she dated my friend , But i wasn’t  fond abt knowing her that period) . SO ITS A ONE SUNNY DAY IN 2013 WHERE .. jk it was on break-time period around 10-10.30 in the morning where i (okay i actually really have forgotten either i stole her number from a friend or ask for it) NEVERTHELESS THATS NOT THE CASE (it will be the case Joul if she finds out you forgot abt it) UGHHHH...PLS...ENCOURAGE...ME... OKAY I MIGHT ACTUALLY HAD ASKED FOR IT (don’t lie Joul) ... ITS BETWEEN THE TWO FFS , STOP MESSING W MY FEELINGS YOU SICK HUNCH! *inhale-exhale peacefully* . I AM OKAY NOW :) SO :) HMMM (whats w the smiley face) *this paragraph is a chaos create new one*

*new paragraph* so its between those two , the reason why i *EITHER* asked or stole it, its bcs she seems friendly the way she texted w him (they actually talk abt Neymar that time hahaha i remembered) , and no im not gonna spit down what our convo looked like afterthat , but forreal we got that same thinking w all the pros and cons of everything , abt the past and the future , we coped well cause she’s VERY VERY VERY AND REALISTICALLY FRIENDLY so idts it would be so hard for her to make friends and make a bond w everyone (WAIT... IF YGUYS ARE COMPATIBLE , WHY DON’T YGUYS JUST DATE?) . well Tumblr , if i wouldn’t be thinking of my future w her. I might have dated her long ago , She knows the drill too but it was never an issue for us

Had a thought during our fun-joy texting period that I and her would only be friend for temporary or maybe just a “hai bye” acquainted . BUT ... 29th September , 2013 proved me wrong . Its the day where we actually met , Accidentally i shall said cause we didn’t really planned on meeting . As i walked past by her group of friends she called up by my nickname hahaha , w that “ HAI DITO” all clear and clarity to that sound so i just said HI back and smile . We don’t really talked that day (idk why) . We did texted when we reached home abt meeting eachother and “oh wow you’re cute in real life” kinda expression. i wish i could actually tell detail information abt our conversation and what we’ve been thru but this story wouldn’t get to its end for even in 2hrs hahaha . Since that day , we’re officially-lawfully-ideal best buddy for life.

Time flies so fast , as if i’ve just known and met her yesterday . We went to the same college for a year in 2015-2016 , she’s still there but not me . I still remember the first day we met on college after such a long-drought of not meeting each each other .We had this cute-little hugs on elevator on our way to the basement hahaha . ITS SO CUTE , and ofcourse many more hugs came from her . okay back to basic.. We shared our stories together, We called each other on phone tho very seldomly hahaha but the memory stays fresh in me . We talked abt how stupid , reckless and unworthy our ex-es were (mostly came from her) . i know i can sense if she’s not okay even that she said she’s okay . some ppl might say she’s problematic but that’s not how i view her . yes she got plenty of problems but she intends to keep it , that’s what i called that she’s just the victim of situation . Not truly her fault . Tho she can be so stubborn yet i would still love her . At some point i’ve been thinking that both of us is the contrast of each other character : Our attitude,  social life, style of living ... yet , its the same moment where i felt that I and her have that strong bond towards each other . We had our ups & downs , She was there when i needed her the most : I loved how she never judged me . I am always the pessimist and negative side but i know she got my back and vice versa, Cause that’s what bestfriends would do . Supportive and encouraging towards the journey. She might be a Diploma holder in the nearest time and i would be glad for her achievement , And i hope she would achieve much more in life.

We may not talk nor meet regularly due to focusing on studies but i know at some glance she’ll remember me , Even if i dropped drastically from her ‘important ppls’ charts . As long as i’ll have 1% chance of going top , I’ll put 99% faith on it . But hey, that’s part of growing up : Living w big circles of countless friends , active social life cause that’s what growing up needs to do for living (:

xoxo, J  *stopped writing at 3.56AM*  *currently missing the hugs hahaha*

[nevery0urz]

august 12, 2019 (i copied this from the tumblr that me and my friends share because im too lazy to re type) nothing new just same old drama lmao so today is robbie’s bday he’s 20 i said happy birthday to him at midnight, it wasn’t anything special just “happy birthday” normally when we were dating i would send him a cute long ass paragraph but not this year i’m sure someone else *cough cough* psycho chick is PROBABLY sending him all the cute shit *insert yawn emoji* but anyway i feel kinda bad for just saying just hbd so what i’m doing is messaging him happy birthday throughout the day is that obsessive? idk but he seems to love it everytime i send it anyways i checked the fly’s vsco today yeah i found a name for her now it’s a fly and im not changing it anyways i checked and it seems like the chick is not having a good day today, a lot of “ignore me why don’t you i can be rude too” etc. as her caption, we shall see where this goes, can’t blame me for being nosy when she be posting all about it online, you know i kind of feel bad i’m talking bad about her like everytime im just like yikes this is not you nina you’re better than this but then im like i deserve to get it out of my chest and rant it somewhere??? it’s better than being impulsive and being petty on other platforms right? idk look at me trying to justify my actions anyways robbie is at his lakehouse w his friends but he’s been texting me a lot for some reason like i know he’s busy w his friends doing things but he finds the time to text back and update me on things i feel good about it?? while we’re here i might as well talk about robbie for a “minute” so he’s been v like sweet and cute or whatever like he’s trying you know i can tell, i’ve been cold to him sometimes but like i just feel bad for acting that way but like he deserves it? i’ve been trying to open up and stuff but i still got trauma lol even though he didn’t cheat he did leave me for someone else but i mean after we started talking again he has opened up to me completely he literally poured his heart out to me the other night and my heart cracks bro, he has a playlist for me called Portland Sunset and one of the song is called my kind of woman and he can not listen to that song w/o crying because he always think of me because like i love that song and i always play it in the car when im w him and he starting breaking down saying how he lost me bro my mf heart im like tearing up rn just thinking about it anyways yeah he’s a dumb bitch he really lost an amazinggg ass girl AKA ME BITCH, also you guys should listen to the song called “clarity - mars alva” it’s his friend’s song and idk i really like it, it’s the only song i like by him lmao his friend wrote this song for his gf it’s fucking cute while im here talking about spotify i would like to promote my RECENT playlist too it’s called Man On The Moon and bitch i think it’s my favorite playlist other than Luv Moodz II but idk if it’s your taste though it’s kinda electric-y psychedelic-y it’s kinda like when you’re high and this is the playlist you’d listen to it makes me feel like im in space just floating around i love tame impala, this playlist is kindaaa for robbie but yeah me and him like to refer to each other as planet space shit it’s fucking weird but it works for us he refers me to the sun or like yellow or something it’s his fav happy color