#idk what ur wishes are for the project

[kindred-spirit-93]

Sup, it's me Astron

I've gotten to the point where I'm not sure what to talk about next. There is generally more, I'm just not sure what specific topic to talk about - lol

Any questions?

Also I hope that you are feeling better!

howdy friend! a little late lol but yes thank u im doing much better :) hope you are doing exceedingly well and that life is kind to you

whatever you feel like honestly. be it ideas for character design and arcs, random ideas and dialogues, blueprints and first drafts, the whole nine yards. and memes!!! especially memes lol

and if you want to start writing go for it! id love to read (maybe even proofread/ work on/ draw for if and when the time allows it lol) and see how the story develops from there, since this was once a project of yours its remains up to you really

as for questions; i think apollo and artemis require some thought, like symbolism wise and perhaps syncretism in the pantheon in general too. youve established a couple dynamics and base characterisations (as well as world building), how about conflicts and plot points? ooh and mortals! is this like 21st century setting or one through time?

allow me to steal the rest of this ask to art dump lol

demeter! tried to give her a different look for each season (nothing solid ofc just concept ideas). i think shes a very dynamic diety and i will absolutely elaborate further this weekend lol

my fatal flaw is drawing on my lecture notes. frankly the inspiration never translates onto empty pages, it must be in the margins.

a demeter closer to not-onion-earring persephone. speaking of whom

she may not vocally express it but she does love her yappers (hades & demeter infodumps!) and enjoys listening to them. sometimes lol.

--

tis all from me, gotta go cram information inside my noggin >:) all the best!!

[clownattack]

sorry lol someone just got SO CLOSE to a proper apology and then they fucked it up (as always) by closing it up with something that makes it backhanded and just proves the points i made b4 oops NVM after actually reading it instead of skimming its just the same old deflecting bs ive seen before

[ham1lton]

mind of mine.

pairings - lewis hamilton x singer!reader

faceclaim - beyoncé

warnings - 18+ content.

summary - lewis has just dropped his first full length album after winning his final championship. the internet goes wild trying to find his muse.

author’s note: thank u so much for the support so far and a reminder that requests for my 500 followers celebration are still open! 💕

— part one of my 500 followers celebration ♡ —

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liked by lewiswifey, landonorris and 493,789 others.

ham1ltonshaderoom: lewis hamilton’s first album under the pseudonym xnda, has finally been released. the explicit nature of the album has people wondering who the muse of the project could possibly be. what are we thinking ham1ltons?

view all comments

user1: shakira. i mean c’mon. they were linked together recently. it makes sense!

user2: maybe he got back with nicole?

-> user4: yeah and maybe aliens are real 🙄

user87: it’s about me. stay mad y’all 😍😝

user7: it’s about nico.

-> user6: IJBOL 😭

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liked by yourusername, user272 and 1,837,738 others.

lewishamilton: thank you to everyone who sent me birthday wishes! really appreciated! i had a great day celebrating with family and friends. here’s to the big 4-0!

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user2: not even talking about your album that just hit number one on the billboard charts ur so sick!!

user6: he’s so fine i’m frothing at the mouth.

user8: favourite song off the album??

-> lewishamilton: what album? 🤔😉

user7: WHO IS UR MUSE MR HAMILTON??! 🤨

-> lewishamilton: it’s sir 😉

-> user7: WHO IS UR MUSE SIR HAMILTON??! 🤨

-> user8: he’s silent when it comes to the REAL questions….

user13: him and those damn winky emojis….

yourusername: thanks for letting me celebrate with you! it was an amazing night 🫶🏽

*liked by lewishamilton*

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liked by ynswifey, yourbffsuser and 1,982,627 others.

yourusername: drunk all summer! 💕

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ynswifey: the best vegan ice cream advert ever.

*liked by yourusername.*

user2: her eating vegan ice cream…. in a car that looks suspiciously like lewis’s…. using a lyric from one of his songs in her caption….. is this thee muse?

-> hater1: nah. she’s just clout chasing as usual.

-> ynfan1: not u saying THEE y/n l/n, who has the most grammy wins of all time, forever changed the way music was released and was cosigned by the greats such as prince, stevie wonder and tina turner… is clout chasing 😭

-> user6: like i’m just a casual fan and i know that statement was outrageous 😭

lewishamilton: told you edoardo’s was great.

-> yourusername: shouldn’t have doubted you 🫶🏽.

-> user7: the way this would be thee power couple…

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liked by yourusername, lewiswifey and 2,373,929 others.

lewishamilton: my forever muse <3

view all comments

yourusername: love you forever 🫶🏽

-> lewishamilton: love you more 💕

landonorris: MY SWEET VIRGIN EYES!

-> user6: virgin yes. sweet?? idk abt that…

user8: user maxies on twitter must be overjoyed.

-> maxies: YALL SILENCED ME… BUT I PREVAILED ‼️

user5: vegan icons !!

user9: not him stealing my wife….

-> user12: not her stealing my husband…

-> user10: i’m having a ball in this bitch. we throuplin! 😍

lewishamiltonupdates: omg did we just become stepsiblings? y/nupdates

-> y/nupdates: i guess so! hi sis 😍🫶🏽

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taglist: @23victoria @luckyladycreator2 @mxdi0 @dangeroustacoalienbiscuit @casperlikej @nichmeddar @evie-119 @ironmaiden1313 @d3kstar @ravisinghs-wife @demvnsriot @ajvaix @raevyng @iloveyou3000morgan @namgification @formulaal (don’t see yourself or wanna be removed? send me an ask!)

[amarayys]

EPISODE 13 CHP 2 DRDT SPOILERS.

so. WHAT THE FUCK. Levi has basically no empathy confirmed. He wants to be liked but he doesn't understand what caring about others is like. Ace tells levi to die. Lmao. Also he's so suspicious +He mentions the only person who he ever trusted. WHO NOW??? Eden and Arei doomed yuri. We get Arei and David flashback. Arei's cg looks like sora from sdra2s final cg btw thats just a random thought i had. Arei you can't do this to me. She really said "I'm a piece of shit but so is David so let's fix eachother" AUHSVGDHBJFKL Okay. EDEN. WHAT THE FUCK. EDEN. NOBODY SAW THIS COMING. I WAS SO CONVINCED IT WAS TERUKO BUT IG NOT??? Eden took Xander's eye out. So. Eden's probably a traitor, though it's probably not voluntary - we see her crying as she holds the bloody fork. I'm sorry, but with this, I think Eden culprit and Levi accomplice theory is over. I just don't think it works. Also how in the fuck does Arei know about that. my girl eden getting character development real david lying cause he thinks hes tough shit teruko DEFENDING LEVI??? YALL???? SHES PROJECTING HOW SHE FELT IN CHP 1 ONTO LEVI AND DEFENDING HIM I HATE HER /pos DAVID SNEEZING SPRITE LMAO. okay so all secrets are revealed. Teruko is either lying or mistaken about her secret, cause the look David gives her after it CANNOT be innocent. this does tell us something though - the family one applies to teruko, if shes not lying on purpose. but...what??? Who does family refer to? It cant be her parents, she never knew them. And she barely remembers her brother. Maybe it's the others at the orphanage, or her friends? Also, she feels survivors guilt apparently and wished she died with whoever family is. Somebody give my girl Teruko a break. EVERYONE SMOKES TERUKO FOR NOT KNOWING WTF THE SPINNY THING IS. Fandom cheers as Teruko finally stops getting interrupted and explains the murder method. WHIT AS A DOG HAD ME CACKLING I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING. We see that Teruko's drawing isn't much better than her handwriting (which we get more samples of btw!!!!!!!) Nico's gonna have to explain the murder... maybe the theory that Nico was framed by / helped someone is true, but idk. Teruko's interrogating the shit out of them. So. Culprit? I think realistically, the best options for the culprit are Ace, Rose, and Whit. Maybe Hu, Veronika or Nico if you squint REALLY hard but I doubt it. I think Ace is SUPER suspicious, half because vibes and half because david calling his ass out here

Rose definetly has potential to be the culprit, but idk. im tired leave me alone. WHIT. EVERY SINGLE FUCKING THING YOUVE SAID THIS TRIAL IS SO SUSPICIOUS. YOUVE BEEN THROWING BLAME ONTO LEVI CONSTANTLY. U KNOW ABOUT HANGING SPECIFICS FOR SOME REASON. UR SO SUSPICIOUS UR NOT SUSPICOUS ok thats it unrelated to this post, i made a doc of my live reactions to stuff and here are some things i wrote that i thought were funny

I am tired but this episode was SO good. I'll probably make a more in dept theory/post on it tmr lmao its 1:36 am.

[wnbnny]

happiness looks good on you- lee felix

summary: you love felix, but he doesn't love you back.

warnings: sad ending, angst!

author's notes: hi everyone<3 this is my first fic, kinda wrote this at like 3am on a whim instead of sleeping but like😭 idk why i made this so sad (is this a sign im depressed or something) but hope u enjoy!! please to comment ur user if u want to be tagged in this or my future posts<3

"happiness looks good on you."

raging storms and unshed tears.

"happiness looks good on you."

heartbreak and rainy days.

"hurry up lix, we're going to be late," you complained, brow furrowed as you stuck your bottom lip out in a pout.

"if you really want to go to school that early just walk there yourself." felix taunted, knowing you were scared to walk alone. he was your long-term best friend, inseparable since kindergarten 'til today.

the two of you argued and bickered on the way to school, throwing insults at each other. by the time the both of you had gotten to school, you were both given a scolding and told to sit down. you glared at him as you were being scolded while he just snickered.

the audacity of this man, honestly . 

by the time class had finished, you had cooled down, just like felix knew you would. otherwise, he could just stick out his bottom lip while you huffed and pretended to be mad. 

"y/n!" he gasped, clutching at your arm, "areum just looked at me!"

he squealed, like a little kid at the toy shop, over his long time crush.

if only you looked at me in that way.

because i do.

"nah, she probably was just looking at someone else." you lied through your teeth, feeling your heart sink.

"hey, stop being mean!! she clearly looked at me," he pouted.

you sighed.

i've loved you for years and you've never noticed.

"well just confess to her already then."

it was painful watching your own crush and best friend fall for someone else, someone that wasn't you. 

you wished, rather selfishly, that areum would reject him. then you could be the shoulder he would cry on. not her. but honestly, you couldn't bring yourself to hate her. what was to hate? she was pretty, got good marks, and was friendly and easygoing. not to say you yourself weren't pretty, but you just weren't as pretty and hardworking as her. 

and you weren't the one he wanted. 

maybe the pain would end if they just ended up together and you were out of the picture. it was obvious she liked him too. 

"you really think i should? but what if i get rejected..."

you're so blind but i still love you.

"yes, how many times do i have to say this, she likes you. it's obvious." you rolled your eyes.

"should i just confess tomorrow? better late than never..." he trailed off, worrying at his bottom lip with his teeth.

gods you look so cute when you do that.

"yeah. get her some flowers and write her a note."

why were you breaking your own heart? you didn't know why. maybe you just wanted to end your own heartbreak. 

"good luck with that, anyways i need to go to s house for a project." you actually didn't, but you would do anything to just escape from this.

"why~~are you really just going to leave me alone to plan my big confession by myself," he whined.

"sorry lix, but you'll figure it out." ruffling his hair, you walked out the classroom.

you did, in fact, go home. then sat on your bed and cried until you couldn't  physically squeeze any more tears out of you.  so this was what heartbreak felt like. you had known him since the both of you were ten. you had have multiple crushes here and there, but they were just passing, fleeting moments, nothing of importance. until him.

you didn't know when you had first started to like him. maybe it was that time in the library where he was helping the librarian stack books. maybe it was that time in the rain where he danced in it for hours. 

maybe it was one summer day where your world just exploded in colours. 

and now it felt like it was fading back to grey.

the next day, felix came bouncing up to you.

"i got her peonies, do you think she'll like it? i told her to meet me in the garden."

"yeah, she'll definitely like it. i would've too... " you muttered the last part all to yourself, turning away and blinking rapidly as tears threatened to prick your eyes. you offered him a smile of encouragement. 

"good luck."

when lunch came, you watched as the nervous australian carried the peonies and went to the garden.

then you watched as they walked in ten minutes later, smiling bashfully and holding hands like schoolchildren in love. 

because they were.

you went home, not even bothering to call in sick. you just grabbed your bag and went home. you would deal with the consequences later. 

your heart hurt.

you were numb.

you were hollow.

you were crying.

you hated everything.

the next few days were spent at home. you called in sick. felix texted you countless times but you ignored him.

lixie&lt;3

y/nie?

where r u?

she accepted!!!

im so happy>.<

read at 2:03 a.m.

yeah, right. good for you. but what about me?

lixie&lt;3

...hello?

y/n?

can u please respond...

im worried...

what happened???

why didn't you come to school today??

read at 3:46 p.m.

you turned off your phone then turned over and cried again. you hated this. why did you have to fall for him in the first place?

finally, after four days of missed calls, texts, and school, you had to go back. its not like you had a choice anyways. you missed your parents. they lived overseas though, so you lived alone. but you really couldn't continue living like this for the rest of your life, even if you wanted to.

"y/nie!!!" felix exclaimed, running up to you. "why didn't you respond to my texts? are you okay? it's unlike you..."

"im sorry lix, i was just under the weather. im ok." you offered him a tight lipped smile. "congrats by the way." you closed your locker door and rushed off before he could ask you anything more.

"huh? thats unlike her... why is she acting so weird lately?" 

and so you avoided him, as much as you could. you kept your conversations short and brief, not talking to him as much as possible, and even switching seats to sit far away from him. you watched his hurt face the day he walked in and saw you sitting somewhere else, but then cheering up as areum sat next to him. you watched as he laughed and held hands, ate tteokbokki and ramen with her in the cafeteria. that should've been me.

but honestly, it did nothing to fill the felix-sized hole in your heart.

you drifted apart. he barely texted you now, barely said hi to you, barely even saw you in the hallways anymore. 

then exams were finished, and graduation started to roll around. 

you watched as they attended prom and twirled around on the dance floor giggling.

you watched as they broke up on the doorstep of his dorms, watching as felix's face fell when she dumped him for another guy.

you didn't have the heart to tell him i told you so.

so you busied yourself in your exams, earning a scholarship to your dream university. felix tried reaching out to you several times to rekindle your old friendship, but you would always politely decline, preferring to be detached instead of going through more heartbreak.

you still loved him, but the once burning passion had now been reduced to a soft flicker every now and then, sparking ever so slightly whenever you saw him in the corridors. your own felix-shaped hole in your heart hadn't decreased over the years, but your heart became bigger, expanding so that other people could fit in it. the hole would always be there, but at least there was space for healing.

you turned around in the backseat of your friends' car to see the campus you had once called home fading away into the distance and felix along with it.

goodbye, the wind whispered.

"happiness looks good on you, lix. i hope you make the best of it."

[str4wberrysw4n]

𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧?? ⋆˙⟡♡

This seems like a question with a pretty simple answer. "Manifestation is when you shift your reality to another or you change your reality. " that's what I believed as well. however, i only recently came to the realization of what manifestation is and it shocks me how simple it is.

Manifestation is literally it's name: it is manifesting something. The something aka the 4d. Others are always saying to imagine and that the 4d is the true reality. But I think people like me thought it meant that the 4d will give you your "desires". However, that isn't accurate, because that is implying that you didn't have your "desire" in the first place.

Manifestation, in the loa context, is when you picture your desire to the point that your subconscious has no other choice but to relent. Simply having that "imaginary" thought in your head is enough to manifest it if you wish so. You manifested because you imagined yourself manifesting your 3d desire.

Let's say you wanna manifest doe eyes or some other appearance change. How do you do it? While you don't need to be consciously manifesting, all you need to do is as follows:

1. Decide your desire

2. Place your desire in the 4d

3. Literally stop giving a shit

That's it. There will obviously be conflicting feelings and resistance from your mind; the 3d is constantly try to push it back, make it comfortable again. That's why you must persist. Whenever I get 3d or mental push back, I tell myself: "No, no, no. I have my desire in the 4d, therefore I actually have it. My eyes have pink sparkles in them in the 4d? Boom! I have it in the 3d."

Because the 4d is the only true reality, it's not that you are "getting" doe eyes from your imagination. You are just simply being made consciously aware of them in the 3d as well. Idk if anyone else has has this specific feeling, but sometimes, I'm so detached from my manifestations I can't tell if I always had them.

I manifested doe eyes, soft lips, a natural reddish/pinkish "blush" to my face, long natural nails, and other appearance changes. However, some of them (specifically my face) have felt like I always had them. Like I'll be manifesting and one day I'll be looking in the mirror and be like "wait... I lwk kinda have what I'm manifesting..." and I won't be able to tell if its my doing or not (._.)

to sum it up, manifestation isn't "changing your reality/3d", but rather making your consciousness aware of the 4d and projecting your "desires" into the physical reality. u barely have to do anythinggg to receive ur "desires" ; u just need to fuking exist and an opportunity will manifest itself in the 3d.

hope this helpeddd!! happy manifesting (≧∇≦ ིྀ)ﾉ

[py-dreamer]

Ok so I might've gone over time again a lil bit BUT I STILL MADE IT!!!

"Why is it Nezha? First Mk, then Mei, why Nezha? Shouldn't it be Pigsy or Tang or Red Son? Why are you robbing the less popular characters their spotli-"

SHUSH!!!!

Ok so a reason I made Nezha next, is cause I have an upcoming project due soon and I require our 3rd lotus princey over here to come help me.

Look it's an art thingy and the theme is 'Legacy of the gods' and I did chinese mythology not LMK. As such I couldn't pick an lmk exclusive character like Mk or Mei. Furthermore, since it was about the 'gods' specifically, I'm more focused on the deities and less demons the like.

Also a lot of my project has featured so much JTTW, and I'm sure it definitely will in future...So to break up from that and for a bit of variety, I've added in our lotus friend.

(I mean, I suppose I could've done Chang'e but I just decided Nezha had more myths so he was my best bet)

And I couldn't do Wukong. Cause I'm already doing another piece with him, I made two stickers of him already. They will know I have favorites. And I do, I know I do but damn it if I don't wanna show it so obviously!!!

Actually, originally I had like a list of who I wanted to do and it was mostly like main cast of lmk with some fan favorites/my favs here and there and Nezha was towards the bottom but I moved him up due to the reasons above. And I was going to do Pigsy and Tang today but that's not how things turned out, I'll still do them just everyone's gonna have to be moved up in the list now.

Don't ask me what kinda cake it is, if I had to guess some kinda cheesecake with like a thin layer of jelly on top. The pink/red contributes to his main color scheme and the blue jelly makes it look like a pond and all the decorations and lotuses on top look like they're floating in water.

And I suppose it's different from Mk and Mei's cause like the KNY arts have different cakes sometimes why not do the same for these guys? And Nezha is a prince, and the patron god of children! I think he deserves something nice. (I used Giyu's cake for reference)

The filling is strawberries again, hopefully better drawn this time and actually sakura petals instead of lotus ones. I don't know why I used sakura petals, the color is more like lotuses but the shape is inspired after sakura so maybe it's a hybrid.

I do enjoy that it is more detailed than the previous two (especially since I'm using it for a project-)

I actually had a lot of trouble thinking of the sugar cookies cause there's not much associated with Nezha other than his lotus theme and his weaponry. Like at least Mei had her sword and her dragon insignia in different styles! I didn't wanna just do lotuses for like 3 times so I did his universal ring and that golden brick from that one episode. And yes, that brick is an actual thing in the mythos, it's not just a quick visual gag.

I did copy paste the frosting swirls and shells from Mei, don't @ me pls they just looked cool, I needed something to jush up the cake and COME ON THEY LOOK COOL HOW COULD I NOT

No I did not change the color but the minty green broke up all the pink and gold nicely, I think...

I did add the lotus flower and that green thing that triggers ur tripophobia is a lotus fruit. So for those who don't know, lotuses are edible! Not water lilies though. There's a difference. And lotuses can be made into lotus jam and it's delicious! I do recommend trying a lotus jam bao at least once.

Now I know Nezha is a chinese deity and mochi/dango is japannese but Idk what other desert to use and I didn't feel tanghulu fit the vibe...

But yea, those are his flaming fire wheels he skates on, that's why they're on fire, no it's not the rings of the samadhi fire. (I'll be saving that for RS) though now, I do wish I'd just done the outline in a darker shade to make it look like it was an actual image grilled into the mochi rather than a sticker slapped on.

The sneks! Omg! I almost forgot about them! But yea, those are the golden serpent shears we saw in that one episode. They are a bit last minute but I think they turned out decently well. Lil bleps.

Then we have the fire tipped spear and yes, that is Ao Bing. I'm sorry, I know I said I shipped them, and I still do (I see lmk nezha as both mentally and physically an adult don't try me) but damn that idea popped into my head and it was funny. He's fine...I think

(also funny to think Mei's is all dragon oriented and here's Nezha and Ao bing like bleep)

The reason the ribbon is so long is cause it's the goddamn armillary sash that Nezha uses, and it's its own canon magic thing, why not let it be longer and yes I did add some white detail but I just thought it looked more finished and it's a celebration! Let him be festive!

I really like the pose like Nezha receiving a lil present. I think he's the kind of person to not expect presents but be pleasantly surprised at them.

And btw that balloon has lily pads, it's not a globe. I know they should be elevated for lotuses but I can't exactly make the leaves pop out.

So later today should be Tang and pigsy hopefully!

(Also I've noticed a trend in general lmk posts. Ships, duos, trios basically anything with a relationship of some kind always do better than just one character so if I had to guess this like my other birthday posts won't do that well)

Oh and @leesbian42, before I forget, happy almost birthday! If I remember correctly you're turning like 24 right?

[beebotea]

Hewllo!! Id like to drop a msg, i read ur heartsteel kayn's college boy and i adore the little details of his actions u put in ♡!! Id definitely like to see more stories on college boi kayn from you!! ♡

☁️ ˖⁺ academic misfortunes — kayn (heartsteel)

pairing: heartsteel!kayn x f/gn!reader genre: fluff, crack, college!au cw: idk probably ooc, not proofread :0 i.e.: adventures of collegeboy!kayn and his classmate/tutor!reader

aahhh! im so glad you enjoyed it <333 i might do a mini series/collection of drabbles for collegeboy!kayn. please send in any requests or ideas you may have or just thoughts to chat about :DD

spinoff of this post

Kayn isn’t what you’d thought he’d be, to be completely honest. Going off of fancams, fanfics, and the general perception of his character to the public eye, you expected Heartsteel’s lead rapper to be a bit more… cool? Well, at least he certainly tries to come off that way.

However, you quickly learn that Kayn is really just a really, really closeted softie loser boy at best trying to compensate with a big attitude because he thinks edgy is cool or whatever. Of course, he would definitely attempt to murder you if you were to speak of these musings out loud but you couldn’t help but find his off-putting demeanour a bit endearing after a while… something akin to a hyperaggressive chihuahua or a rabid raccoon. But of course, there are other times where you’d wish he’d just fuck off and leave you alone.

“Hey loser.” He calls you from the steps, walking up to where you sit in the lecture hall. “Did you do the homework? Let me copy off of you.” He slides into his usual spot next to yours, throwing his backpack haphazardly on the ground beside him.

“You’re not copying my shit. Fuck off, Kayn.” You roll your eyes at him and continue to read through the slides for today’s class.

“C’mon, have some empathy, yeah? The boys and I had practice all day yesterday.” He was a decent enough liar, but he could have been better if he hadn’t texted you to postpone your tutoring session with a picture of him and Aphelios playing with a random pit bull yesterday instead of attending band practice or completing his homework.

“Kayn, this worksheet was assigned like two weeks ago.”

“So? I had stuff to do two weeks ago!” That part was a bit true; Alune always gave you a copy of the band’s promotion and practice schedule for the month to keep you updated.

It was difficult to refer to him as your friend. You saw him often enough—every day in almost every class. And you’ve worked with him on countless partnered projects by now—he’s only ever able to do work with you (in other words, he scares off anyone who tries to ask you to be in their group or be their partner). But he was always a complete pain in the ass.

When you first became acquainted with Heartsteel’s resident delinquent, you were assigned to be his tutor by one of the department heads at the request of Yone. Begrudgingly accepting the role in exchange for “VIP tickets to all concerts, all inclusive backstage passes at events and shoots, and first dibs to new merch releases,” you began your new job as Kayn’s personal tutor for the various courses he was performing horrendously in. It was by no means smooth sailing when you started. Trying to make plans around his schedule, finding places he wasn’t already banned from to study, getting kicked out of establishments because of his hissy fits at minor inconveniences, and then ultimately agreeing to work at his dorm every weekend instead so you don’t have to hide your face in public. What surprised you the most was how hardworking he actually was when he put his mind to it, even paying attention to your explanations for hours until he could grasp the concept at an intermediate level—or got hungry. What was more was that he even showed rapid improvement, bringing back marks higher than a C- and occasionally reaching the mid to high 70s after a month and a half of beginning his tutoring sessions.

“Okay fine. Just this once, alright?”

“Yeah, yeah, I promise.” He flashed you a snarky grin as you pushed your papers towards him, pointing out which ones were a bit more difficult to understand and summarising what should’ve been an explanation done during one of your tutoring sessions.

“You really should start focusing up on your work though, you know. Finals is coming up soon and these exercises are really good for preparation.”

When the professor finally dismissed the class, you found yourself waiting behind for the bright haired rapper.

“Aw you waited! That’s cute.” He sent a quick wink your way as he caught up to you.

“Well you said you were gonna give me a ride to your place so.”

“Just had to ruin the moment didn’t you.” He chuckled, ushering you to follow him. “I hope you’re not scared of motorcycles or anything because I finally got Yone to let me ride it.”

“Huh?”

“Now where did I park it… hm let’s see… Oh! Here!” He grabbed you by the wrist to pull you towards a red and black motorcycle decorated on its sides with white flames. “Sooo whatd’ya think?” He nudged your sides as he grinned at you.

“You are not driving me in that.”

“Oh come on, of course I am! I have a license for it and everything!”

“Kayn you’re literally gonna get us killed.”

“Will not! C’mon, don’t you trust me? After everything we’ve been through? When have I ever let you down?”

“Like literally this morning when you cheated off of my worksheets instead of completing them before hand like you said you would.” You rolled your eyes at him, missing the way he pouted at your words.

“I promised it was a one time mistake!” He took two helmets from a storage compartment in the vehicle and shook them in front of your face, hoping that his attempt to show you his knowledge of roadside safety would sway you in the right direction. “So? How about it?”

With a defeated sigh, you agree with a mumbled “fine” as he threw you your helmet and instructed you to get on behind him. He even took the time to emphasize the importance of ‘holding on [to him] really really really tight.’

“See? ‘wasnt so bad was it?” He said as he helped you off the motorbike, lifting you off the seat by the waist. He helped you steady yourself when your feet finally touched the ground. His hand never seeming to leave its place on your hip.

“It was… fine. I guess.” You couldn’t help but give him a small grin, having enjoyed the ride and being so close to him. Kayn seemed to want to say something else until he was interrupted by a voice calling from the window above you.

“Hey! Kayn’s back!” Ezreal’s green head could be seen poking out from one of Heartsteel HQ’s many windows, waving to the two of you below him. “Hurry up inside! Yone made ramen!”

Before he knew it, you bolted past him and through the front door at the promise of Yone’s homemade cooking.

a/n: def down to write more abt this lovesick loser bad boy (please give me more excuses to)

[cypionate60mg]

I just wanted to say I love what you’re doing omg… apologies if im totally missing the point by the way, I have only read some of ur responses to other asks and I’m not well read at all in the philosophy you talk about. Still I feel really seen by your posts or more accurately your posts feel exactly like my state of mind before committing to transitioning…. The repetitive and often kind of fleeting quality of the images you use reminds me of the obsessiveness I used to have over my (purposely unattainable) wishes of what I could be, the sort of wishes that don’t expect to be fulfilled unless pushed to the forefront by someone else, which the forcemasc does…. The captions are so raw and definitive that they feel half like someone else talking to me and half like my own repressed consciousness speaking what it can’t respectably say through someone else. most of the men being guys who I absolutely will not look like (I’m Asian and really short) adds to this because ur posts feel like the expression of an ideal fantasy, with all the caveats and problematic implications of creating an ideal fantasy of what being a man is based on your half-formed understanding of manhood through tv and the movies and whatnot… it rlly feels like trying to formulate an idea of what being a man would be like, without understanding or rlly comprehending the realities of life as the sort of man you will be. And in this way it’s like being on the precipice of taking the steps to actually realize the person you want to be, which you have some image of, but you really don’t know… the thing about transition (ime anyways) is that it highlights how who you are and who you want and what you value are all more intertwined and codeterminate than ppl think. I think many trans men eventually reach this point where they have to grapple with the question of what makes a man, anyways, besides a desire to be one? These posts feel like the state before unraveling any of that but you can see the strings so visibly there, waiting to be pulled on… Also one particular image you used a bit ago the one of the man and woman on the bicycle oh my god idk what it’s actually from but it felt so precisely like something I’d see while closeted and fixate on for weeks and weeks, creating a whole new image of it in my mind as a symbol of what could ideally be, stripping it of what it actually was while making it something more. Also your blog has felt very validating to me in my desire to turn away from wanting to be pretty, even as a man, which I feel is a box transmascs often get placed in against our will. Sorry this became an essay …. All of this is to say that I really appreciate your work and I’m excited to see where u go with it next !

Miss the point? I'd say quite the opposite. And no philosophy primer needed. If I were to go through, line by line, and find quotes of yours that I found incredibly salient and accurate to my own feelings, then I'd probably be copy-pasting your entire message. Very well-said.

There's also something to be said about being Asian and transmasculine. How it is burdened with uniquely specific assumptions about motivations for transition and rampant intracommunity fetishization. I try not to let it overwhelm me. Biting my tongue for now, but I have a lot to say about this. It's part of why I am painfully careful about whose photos I use, and with what text.

I'm relieved that you are able to pick out the intentional shortcomings of this project. The images show us fantasies of masculinity, and the captions do represent (to some degree) the frustration and neediness that comes from wanting to attain those ideals. They're that "repressed consciousness speaking what it can't respectably say", and I am that "someone else" for you, the viewer. I'll always be here to remind you that you should do it, you should chase after it anyway, because pursuing the impossible still changes you in a very real, palpable way.

"If you can't do it good, do it hard."

Thanks, anon. I hope I hear from you again.

Much love, CYP60MG

P.S. That movie is Rebels of the Neon God by Ming-liang Tsai. You should watch it.

[mistywhiskerz]

That Engel moonscorched design is fucked up, I love it. I couldn't find more info on her if I search up "Engel" on ur acc (I'm sorry if there is and I just haven't seen it ;v;), so I'm curious about her and what aspects of her you had in mind when designing her moonscorched form

Oh I’ll totally start tagging her ! Im sorry because this is gonna be LONG!! I also apologise if it doesn’t make sense, I haven’t slept 💔

She’s originally my signalis oc! So most of it translates over, so if you see her as a robot that’s why :3

(Warning because idk how to censor stuff on tumblr; for self harm, gore, nudity!!)

She’s a pilot ! I’m still making lore stuff with her but she’s originally from Rondon.

When designing her Moonscorched form, I wanted to really dig into her fears. She's terrified of the fact that she's been treated differently since childhood because she's afab, that the misogyny she's faced shaped her into being afraid to fully embrace femininity. In one piece of art, she draws a mustache on herself to appear more masculine (I’ll put a bunch of photos at the end!). I will say she doesn't identify as a man, she is comfortable with her gender identity as a woman. She just wish she could freely express herself without fears. I also just adore how she looks with a drawn on moustache jsjsjs

She's also struggles with PMDD (Pre-menstrual dysphoric disorder), which is something that I personally experience and have incorporated into the character's design. The week leading up to her period is usually painful and difficult to get through. so when her period begins it's a huge relief, knowing that the awful week she just experienced was due to PMDD and not her usual self.

Another reason periods are important to her is that she has a phobia of childbirth. So she takes comfort in the knowledge that she is safe when her period comes around. This is why in her moonscorched design her chest and stomach are a vagina, her uterus is bleeding to show period imagery and her fimbriae are holding her stomach open- the reason she has dove wings on her head might seem unrelated but it’s because in her signalis version she’s a dove ! (A type of replika) so it’s a reference to that ! (I also imagine her moonscorched name would be ‘Fallen Engel’ )

I will say, (warning for sh) the reason her stomach is opened up is due to a past injury she caused herself, she has a large scar down her stomach that she did to herself, she wanted to make herself infertile and did it to an extreme during PMDD. So in her moonscorch design her uterus actually has a hole in it, it’s just hard to see !

Basically Engel is a character that I project my gender, period issues and pmdd onto heavily, so her moonscorched design really does have a lot of meaning!

[strawberry-milkbunny]

I have no one to talk to about Tokyo Rev so here r my random hot takes that I need to say:

- Emma and Hina r boring and used as romance plot devices it’s okay to admit that Wakui can’t write women idk I don’t expect shounen/men to be able to write girls well (still cried when Emma died tho bc she didn’t deserve it!!!)

- lol I LOVE Yuzuha and Senju tho

- I actually do like Emma and Draken together but I also firmly believe Draken is in love w/Mikey and was just projecting onto Emma LMAO

- Yuzuha is a lesbian

- Controversial: I don’t think Shinchiro was THAT great of an older brother. Like he was cool but he still introduced Mikey and Izana into the world of gang life/normalizing violence and yeah OG Black Dragons isn’t like that but….what do u expect when u form a gang??? .obviously there’s a high chance that it’s gonna develop into LEGIT gang activity

- As an adult and someone who was basically raised by an older sibling w/a big age gap (my sis is 7 years older) I kinda don’t blame Takeomi for being a bad older brother??? Realistically he’s a 17 yr old in charge of raising 2 toddlers like NO SHIT he did a bad job. At least Shin had his grandfather to help out but Takeomi actually had no one. Doesn’t explain y he’s a brokey LOL buttttt again I don’t FULLY blame him for being a bad sibling still hurt my boi Sanzu 😤😤

- I HC that Mikey is used to having a caretaker (Draken and later Sanzu) bc when Shin died he was so depressed and genuinely couldn’t get out of bed

- Takemitchy is also lowkey boring/typical shounen protagonist and canonically stinky like Hina could do sm better. This is personal preference so I find myself wanting more chaotic/dumb protagonists who are slightly morally ambiguous like Denji, Gintoki, hell even Naruto at times. Takemitchy didn’t get character development until BD arc and that’s just a bit too long for me….

- Koko and Inui r gay and dating 💅🏻💅🏻💅🏻

- the Haitani brothers r the kardashians of the TR universe they’re so embarrassing Deadass show up and pose/do absolutely nothing I LOVE THEM SHKSKSKSK

- I love how it’s universally agreed that Mitsuya and Chifuyu r the best bois

- I have mixed feelings about Izana. I genuinely do like him and DESPISE how he’s whitewashed by fanart

- I get it u genuinely just wanted to not be alone and found out ur adopted in the worst way possible but…..idk how that justifies killing ur own sister but u do u ig 🤷‍♀️ and u have KAKUCHO AS UR FAMILY WTH

- don’t listen to me tho I’m a Mikey and Sanzu stan LMAOO 🤭🤭🤭

- Izana is the definition of mommy issues and 100% had crunchy hair lik mans was homeless

- if I saw Izana IRL I would RUN 🏃‍♀️idk he looks a lil crazy

- also this man does not know Tagalog he didn’t even know he was Filipino until he was lik 12

- idk the Tenjiku arc is so funny to me bc Izana is deadass: imma kill everyone in Mikey’s life for revenge and Mikey is lik: bruh I didn’t even kno u existed until last week and now ur killing our sister UNPROVOKED ???

- Bonten!Mikey is a virgin/no libido mans is DEPRESSED

- wished the Bonten arc was longer simply for the outfits bc Wakui KNOWS FASHION but that shit was DEPRESSION

- 3 Deities Arc was amazing and also funny/serious at the same time. It literally was an all out brawl in an AMUSEMENT PARK

- fr tho wtf was Benkei, Wakasa and Takeomi doing there??? Like they’re canonically 27 GO GET A JOB STOP FIGHTING 15 YEAR OLDS SHKSKSKS

- U cannot tell me that Sanzu WASNT sad when Baji and Mucho died.

- Baji was straight up his childhood friend and the only one other than Senju who knows about the plane incident/Mikey’s possessive side. And In the OG!timeline I’m pretty sure Baji was the only friend Sanzu DIDNT attack. While with Mucho he was pretty much his older brother, Sanzu just decided Mikey was better

- Tbh if the dark impulses/Shin thing wasn’t real I would’ve firmly believed Mikey had DID or something. Which again made only worse by the fact that violence and death is such a regular thing in his life (GET THIS MAN THERAPY LIK WTF IS SHIN AND GRANDPA SANO DOING???)

- Kazutora going a lil crazy is lowkey expected and I hate how we only find out about his home life in the character books. This kid grew up in a physically and mentally abusive household (gaslight to pick between parents and as s/o who has experienced that shit it’s fucked up) and I rlly don’t think prison helped out his mental stability either no shit he tried to kill Mikey

- I don’t ship Mikey and Takemichy (despite the IMMENSE gay ness btwn them) firmly bc I think everyone can see how much power Takemitchy has over Mikey idk it has a weird power dynamic like if Takemitchy tried he could 100% control Mikey (platonically or romantically)

- Baji, Chifuyu and Kazutora r a throuple

- I HATE how Sanzu is reduced to this crazy drug addict. Sanzu is canonically smart, manipulative, and formally trained fighter. He also REMEMBERS the OG timeline, he had to experience Shin dying twice and everyone else die no shit he’s a little bonkers/needs drugs to take everything away. Plus his relationship to Mikey which tbh is a whole separate post

- controversial !!!: I ship Mikey and Sanzu or Mikey and Draken. Sanzu only bc this man has a big ass crush and deserves some niceness for once

- ppl write Kakucho as this shy, nice guy like ur not wrong but mans is also running UNPROVOKED into Yakuza offices like it’s the gym while dragging Rindou wit him 😭😭😭

- the haitanis r the best sibling duo

- It lowkey makes me mad in fanfics where Ran is depicted as cheating w/Rin’s gf like??? This man raised his younger brother himself u cannot tell me he doesn’t love his brother and would actually do that to him

- Ran would 1000% do anything for Rin and i firmly believe he kinda regrets not saying anything in court to prevent Rindou frm joining him in jail. Like saying he forced Rindou to kill someone w/him, abusing his brother at home, etc especially in the Bonten! tl he def thinks about wtf he dragged his brother into

- I also don’t think they’ve slept w/ the same person before. Idk I feel like they have diff types like Ran goes for more motherly/mature types while Rindou goes for sweeter/shy types

- Draken has road rage

- Yuzuha should’ve been taller like AT LEAST 5’7 bitch is related to Hakkai and Taiju for gods sake

- OG BD 100% thought Wakasa was a girl for at least a month. He’s canonically 5’3 and pretty.

- Characters who r 100% bisexual: WAKASA, Senju,maybe Hina, Draken (def in denial), Rindou, Ran (he’s a whore as long as ur pretty he’s down), Sanzu, Koko, Kazutora, Chifuyu

- Mitsuya had a crush on Draken

[thatonesmartkidfromschool]

Ok Mr "I know drayton better than anyone" give us ur headcanons then. Need to test them against mine /lh

Ummm most of my headcanons are just me projecting LMAO.. so maybe they're not all that accurate but idk lmao

So first off. Definitely a burnt out gifted kid. He just gives me that kinda vibe. Like someone who thrived in their youth and completely gave up once things started getting too overwhelming and taking up too much of his personal time. Like idk maybe he felt like he wasn't enjoying his life so he did a massive 180 from one unhealthy lifestyle to another 😭😭

His sleep schedule is absolute shit. Which causes him to be. Maybe a little eepy at times. And by that I mean all the time 24/7 he often struggles to stay awake when not being constantly fed stimuli. But honestly he probably naps a good lot when in the club room. Which doesn't make him any less sleepy but. It feels nice in the moment, at least. I wish I could nap more.

Oh and he just randomly decided to look awful actually. It was all on purpose. One day he thought. What is the worst possible outfit and look I could come up with. And that's how we got toothpaste haired, sweatpants under a skirt boy. Don't trust him when he says it's not a skirt. It's definitely a skirt. He's just messing with you. Like seriously he looks so ridiculous how is this not on purpose.

OH and the toothpaste cut was definitely just an excuse to dress up as a tube of toothpaste every Halloween. He haunts BB academy's freshmen with that shit.

And this one sort of relates to the outfit once but he just. Hates. Having to be serious. It makes him feel awful. It's so much easier to cope with things when you're just joking around acting goofy.

OH and he absolutely adores all the kids in the league club to bits. Just the club as a whole. Means so much to him. Of course, this is kind of obvious given the context of the game but STILL. I guess battling is one of the things that brings him the most joy and he loves sharing that with the club members. And like yeah he hates responsibility so he never actually wants to be president but he wouldn't see helping out the club members one on one as a responsibility.. maybe he just likes to see people enjoying themselves to the fullest like. Yeah. (And also because he just likes showing off his abilities lmao)

Like broooo HE'S ACTUALLY JUST LIKE ME FR??? CHAT????? Anyways there might be more I could add but I can't think of it rn... all of these ideas have been rotating in my head for weeks now thanks for sending this ask.. also gimme your Drayster hcs so we can cross reference them

[lilpotatjj]

Imagine the reader has an acting job on a film and finds out that they are going to be working with Bella ramsey (who they have had a crush on for ages) and then meets Bella snd finds out that they basically both like each other. Then, after shooting they both go to Bella’s house and have s*x but it’s the readers first time with a girl!

A/N: writing readers first time with a girl is rly cute. I also don't have any experience in making out with a girl. I just wish I could tell my Co Worker, which funfact looks a lot like Bella,that I really like her...welp Idk🤣 sooooo...hope you like it and thank u for ur request sweety <33

Warning: Scissoring, pet names, fingering, Bella being waaay to cute, fluff, kissing. so if u don't wanna read that filthy smut feel free to ignore😇

Wordcount: 1,3k

Proofread: nope (only had 30min to write that lol)

Masterlist

♡Crazy feelings♡ (18+)

Lying in bed with someone you never thought you would ever talk to. Naked.....to each other and completely caught off guard.

Yup...

You...

You and...bella?

You and bella!

Yes. It wasn't planned to end like this. But when is anything ever planned?

You are dead tired because it is the middle of the night. A new co-worker is about to arrive, with whom you have a few scenes together. You sip your 5th coffee and spit it right back out when you see who's coming on set.

The Lady of Bear Island, but she is all grown up.

Bella Ramsey is your partner for the rest of the shooting? That's a joke....but you don't feel like laughing because she's what's called an addict. For years now you've been following her projects and trying to stay on top of them.

"Morning" she says, cuddling everyone she already knows. To those she sees for the first time she shakes hands a bit shyly.

"Haah...?" The only thing that comes out of your mouth as Bella shakes your hand. Really?

Get a grip Y/N

"Oh agh..sorry I'm Y/N, nice to finally meet you in person! I mean here on set!" You're totally flummoxed and look down in embarrassment. Bella has to laugh lightly...another one of her super cute giggles.

Shit...now you have to stay calm while working too. This will be pretty hard.

"You're cute" she says dryly without batting an eye. Wait what? Eeeeh.....ok. shit starts getting real.

Days go by and you two get along great. You try not to let anything show, but you have to look at her all the time. Bella doesn't miss that and often stares back cheekily.

"What...? Are you my hardcore fan?"

"And if so?" Yup you just said that out loud.

Fuck

Bella stares at you and actually got red cheeks this time. Now she's the speechless one.

"Maybe I would like that" her eyes are only on you now.

"Because of you, I can never think clearly on the set."

"Maybe that was my goal from the beginning..." she comes menacingly close, making your breath catch. She kisses you carefully to test if you want it as much as she does.

You can't believe what's happening here and despite a brief hesitation you go in for her kiss. Damn, she's driving you crazy and your break is about to end.

"You are so damn cute. I've felt that since the first time we met."

"Wow...I wouldn't-..I...Me? I've never thought that" you look at her in amazement and Bella finds it hard to pull herself together.

"Are you ok...?" You look at her worriedly.

"Yes...you are just too cute...I just want to go to my place and spend time with you"

"Ok....I'll handle it" you clarify with the film director that you can get a break for today, as if Bella wouldn't feel well and together you go to Bella.

"It's really nice here" you look around relaxed.

"Yes, thank you. I'm lucky that the location is not far away from set" Bella throws herself on the couch and takes a deep breath. "Do you want to join me?" She looks at you with hopeful eyes.

"Ok...I'd love to" you are a little unsure. You've never done all this with a girl before. There were the last two guys...but they were never serious. Bella seems very sweet so far.

"I don't know how long I've liked you..but you're even better in person. Really sweet and so open. I really really like you" you sit next to her.

Bella smiles her cutest smile as she looks at you happily. This time you come closer to her and try to get your heartbeat under control. You hesitate but Bella carefully closes the gap between you and her soft lips touch yours.

A kiss, as if both of you are afraid to go too far, to let it get out of hand, but there is this desire. It bubbles deep inside you. The curiosity how it is to go further with a girl.

A slight sigh bursts out of you, unintentionally. Bella sets down briefly and kisses you again only to take your face in her hands. More demanding and greedy, Bella's breathing accelerates. She also has difficulty holding back.

"W...wait..." you look at her. "I've never done this with a girl before...I have no idea how it works".

"Ah don't worry there's no manual for that" she giggles and kisses your neck softly and nibbles it here and there. You bite your lower lip and hesitate to let go.

"It's ok...I'll guide you. I'll show you how it's done. And if you want to stop then just say"

Bella means it lovingly serious. You nod and kiss again, this time more lustfully and your adrenaline means it too good for you. You are totally excited.

After all, she's not just any girl, it's Bella. She rubs her hips against your sensitive spot, which makes you moan softly.

"I'm getting undressed ok?" She stands up and undresses one by one, your blood pressure rising rapidly. Damn your breathing is so fast, you'd think you're having a panic attack.

She just kisses you again to calm you down, which also works quite well because the desire for more grows in you.

This time you're the one pushing your hips against Bella.

"let me undress you" she speaks between kisses and you let her do it.

The kiss gets wilder, the feelings completely overwhelming. When you are also undressed, Bella slowly lies down on you, rubs her pussy against yours and you can feel how wet she is already.

Wet sounds can be heard which only drives you even more crazy. Bella which soft moans let you join in and you can't hold back any longer.

"feels...so good..that's crazy..." you're already tingling, realizing far too quickly how you're approaching your climax.

"just let it come to you...it's ok" she kisses you on the neck and shoulder which is enough to make you overshoot the mark too fast. You hide your face while moaning into her shoulder.

"nah you sound so pretty darling"

Almost annoyed that you cum too quickly, you are completely out of breath.

"I'm not done with you yet" you look at her in surprise and startle when she suddenly starts kissing your folds, licking up all your juice. You claw into her hair and tilt your head back, moaning to yourself.

"someone's still electrified" your cunt is still throbbing and every touch of Bella doesn't make it any better.

"I'm going to stick a finger in" She looks up at you and scrutinizes you as she sticks her finger inside you. You moan, completely lost, but you put your hand over your mouth in shock.

"ah come on baby, I want to hear your beautiful voice" she holds still and you press against her finger to absorb even more of the incredible feeling. She moves it slowly and can't help but smile cheekily. "That's a good girl, keep moaning...all just for me"

A second finger penetrates you, which makes the tingling even stronger. She clearly feels how your pussy around your finger clenching.

"I'm so close pleeease...don't stop" you moan almost in desperation.

"Come on baby, come all for me!" her other hand wanders to your chest, caressing it and she accelerating her movements which makes you a moaning mess.

Your cunt pulsates around her fingers as you cum for the second time. when you calm down a little she pulls out her fingers and licks them off.

"thats way better...as with boys" you say out of breath, still shaky.

"sounds good" she smiles playfully cheeky and kisses you tenderly.

"Next time...I wanna make you happy"

"Sure"

"Your to cute I can't believe it"

"Stop it" she looks cheekily.

"Nope, never"

[nanathott]

https://www.tumblr.com/nanathott/765049047098834944/ur-life-seems-so-perfect-i-wish-i-was-u

To Anon: Hello!! I hope you find a lot of fulfillment in life. I understand that things seem a certain way based on what a person presents/says. However, I think it’s important to realize that literally everyone is a human, not some perfect idol,

with their own veryyy real struggles and flaws. Everyone is growing and learning and imperfect. Everybody.

Some people are doing really well in life, emotionally, physically, healthy and happy. That’s great, but it can also make you feel sad and or jealous when you see that and you feel like you’re in so much pain, but just know that they deserve that and you deserve that too, and you can help yourself. Focusing on your own self is the only way for you to offer yourself the love you deserve. And sometimes life just isn’t fair, and it sucks when you’re suffering, but that doesn’t mean you can’t try to love yourself more, even when it’s hard. Im so sorry that things are difficult for you, because it sounds like you are in need. I hope all the best for you, and it’s also important to realize that you don’t *know* people based on their online presence. You just have glimpses of their life. You can’t know somebody unless you spend a lot of time with them and know about the different kinds of lives people lead, and know about the different kinds of people out there…

That is to say, you shouldn’t compare yourself. You don’t have all the pieces, and comparing never helps anyone. It just makes you feel hurt. It doesn’t help you grow.

It’s rly important not to idolize people, because you’re not seeing them as people at that point (which is good for nobody), and it’s important to make sure that you are taking care of yourself as best you can. You deserve good things! Be kind to everyone, including urself!!

Idk if this advice is me projecting a situation I’ve seen somebody go through, onto you, but I hope it helps a little in some way!

posting this bcs ur always so articulate with words, ty bae

[aladaylessecondblog]

The Sharmat's Lovers (Dagoth Ur/female Nerevarine/Indoril Nerevar)

Author's Note: This is just an excuse for pure unadulterated filth. Sex, oral, fingering, M/M/F, Nerevar has both sets of plumbing because idk

All Voryn's dreams are coming true ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

-------------------------------

It was something that took time to get used to, this strange trio that they had formed.

Sadara had hoped when she was brought back in her ghostly form and restored from her ashes, had seen that hope perish when Vivec returned Nerevar's bones, and had it rise again after a lengthy argument in which she and Nerevar had both stated that the other deserved Voryn more.

And Voryn, oddly, had come up with just the thing to settle the argument.

"Why should I not have both of you? I have two hands, after all."

It had been an odd thought that neither she nor Nerevar had even considered. Each of them had replied, "Why should you want ME when you could have her (or him)?"

And though she had never considered such a thing before Sadara found herself quite pleased with the outcome. She was free to dally with Nerevar, and he with Voryn, and with much discussion they had all grown to rely on the bond between the three of them. After such time in solitude and despair it was wonderful to be so surrounded with love.

Voryn did as he had always done. Nerevar conferred with Gilvoth as to the defense of the place (and of all of the Red Mountain region), and she...well, she tended the home, as she'd wished to for such a long time. It was comforting for her to look after such things, to direct the servants, to see that guests had all they needed. It was wonderful not to have to really worry any longer about things like food, security, or--

"The lady is alone. I believe she was told to avoid this." Nerevar's voice echoed slightly in the large room.

There was, she was sure, no safer woman in all Morrowind than her. No woman better taken care of, fussed over, tended to, doted on.

"The lady was going to have a bath and then a nap," Sadara replied. "Sometimes she thinks her loves worry too much."

"And I think you do not worry enough."

"I spent eighteen years worrying...forgive me for not--"

"I know, dearest. Apologies...given what I witnessed not only in my life but in yours as well...I find it is hard to lay down that anxiety. Every day I expect to wake up and find that all this bliss is nothing more than a cruel illusion."

Nerevar's affection was similar to Voryn's, but where the latter tended to be more silent and grabby in his affection, Nerevar was more inclined to speak his mind and lay his anxieties out. It was a regular habit for some one of them to have a day like this, and for one of the others to comfort and be comforted in turn.

(Nerevar had written a 'holy text' lingering on the subject of loss, the fear of it, and the absolute necessity of enjoying your loved ones as much as possible - for one day, it finished, you may lose them. They were eternal, the people were not.)

"As do I," she replied, relaxing as Nerevar's arms slipped around her. "On the worst days, I simply hunker down and...wait for the feeling to pass."

"Is that why you've hidden yourself from us?"

"You've both been busy today, and it's not as if I can't tend things in relative solitude. We've no guests, and..." she paused slightly at the feel of a kiss in her hair. "...I wish not to burden either of you."

"If there is anything I regret," Nerevar said suddenly, "It is that Voryn got to be the one to deal with Azura. She has been a blight on all of us...whispering poison in our ears, telling us we are nothing without her. Blaming us for every failure in her plan."

"I think I was the main cause of that first failure," Sadara gave a slight laugh. "When I drank that brandy, and..."

"And kissed Voryn. You did what I never had the courage to do."

"Courage had nothing to do with it. I was drunk. I was attempting to tell him that you'd always thought about him in a sexual way, and...being drunk, didn't have the words for it. So I kissed him..."

"And once kissed, the dam of our love burst free."

"You seem to take a more romantic view of the...event, but we weren't of a mind to think too much on that at the time. At least, I wasn't. 'Fucking me like a madman not five feet away from the heart' is how I might put it."

"Quite a colorful way to put it, but having watched it, perhaps you're right. But regardless. It was that kiss, that fucking, that has saved Morrowind. At least if Vehk is telling the truth...the tale he wove is a strange one."

"You were spying--filthy mer! And could we not speak of Vivec right now?" Sadara squirmed, and managed to turn herself around. "Talk of quite literally anything else."

There was a pause--and then they both laughed.

But a moment later Nerevar looked down at her upturned face, and pressed a deep kiss to her lips. The second he parted with her for air she said, "You're as eager as Voryn, aren't you?"

"He wasn't the only one to finally have a drink of the 'waters of relief,'" Nerevar said, "More than four thousand years. Surrounded by beauty, yet unable to touch it. He was imprisoned in a desert and I in an ocean. Water, water, everywhere, and not a drop to drink."

"Then drink," Sadara replied--and this time she was the one to kiss him.

There was a growl, and a moment later Nerevar's hands came up, practically tearing at her robe. The next parting had her giving a laugh.

"You and Voryn are determined to ruin my wardrobe, aren't you? At this rate I'll have to go about in a loincloth like he does..."

"That and the golden adornments...ah, how often we both think of it...but Voryn, well...if he had his way we'd both dress that way. Such filthy dreams our lord has..."

"Easy access," Sadara got out after another kiss. "That's all he wants out of our wardrobe--"

By this point Nerevar had backed her against her bed, and a second later was lifting her onto it. When she lifted her skirts there was another growl.

"I know what you want," she whispered, "You want to make sure I'm good and loud so he'll hear us. So he'll catch us."

No answer. Nerevar didn't even bother fully disrobing, choosing instead to lower his armor-leather pants just enough to free his cock.

"Oh, the things Lord Dagoth would do if he caught us..."

It was so easy to get Nerevar going, so very, very easy. All she had to do was show her eagerness, mention Voryn and the prospect of being caught, and her warlike love would be hard as a rock and ready to go.

Again the press of Nerevar's lips, and the feel of his cock against her soaked center.

(She hardly bothered with underwear at this juncture, Nerevar and Voryn both had a habit of being too impatient to pull them off and often resorted to simply tearing them to shreds.)

"Go on," she whispered, too wet to wait any longer, "Either fuck me or--"

Nerevar cut her off with a swift thrust that buried him fully inside her. He gave a gasp against her lips, and a groan when he pulled back to thrust again. She crossed her legs behind him, ensuring he couldn't fully withdraw.

She tugged at the belt of her robe, knowing he would do it himself if she didn't do it for him. His hands moved up instantly, opening and pushing it back, exposing her entirely.

"Nothing beneath this robe," Sadara grinned, "How does that make you feel?"

"And I thought I was the tease of this little group," Nerevar groaned against her neck. "You--"

"Me," she laughed and pulled him into a kiss.

Nerevar's thrusts alone would have been enough to do the job for her--simply the feeling of his rapid movements, being filled and spread, over and over. But it was not his way, to leave a thing well enough alone, to settle. So when his next thrust had her falling back, he reached down to stroke over her clit.

"You want to be heard, don't you?" he turned it on her, pressing down with such precision that Sadara was keening almost instantly. "Oh, you do, you--"

A hard thrust, a press down. A moan echoed from her lips that was absolutely pornographic.

"Let him hear us, all the way in the Heart Chamber," Nerevar's teasing went on, his hand still moving, "The louder you are, the faster he comes, and the sooner my poor needy incarnate gets what she really wants."

"N...Neverar," Sadara groaned, "How many--times--do I have to tell you that--I DO want you? Do I have to scream it for you to finally understand?"

His name was a prayer on her lips, as much as Voryn's was at other times, and every time she called it, it was louder--louder--!

She fell apart beneath him, around him, riding out the heated waves as long as possible before letting the warm afterglow rise to drown her.

"On the bed," she gestured vaguely, "I know you're not done yet."

"Voryn is right. You are a greedy thing."

Really she was, but the tease and denial made this game of theirs more interesting. Some one or other of them was always teasing, taking it in turns so no one felt too much was expected.

"Not greedy, only eager. But if you don't want to silence me, I could simply leave...collect my things, have a bath...and leave you to be satisfied in other ways."

That lit a fire under him. Nerevar moved onto the bed once he'd shed his clothes, and lay back, making sure he was comfortable. His cock stood firmly at attention, and she moved up, kneeling before it (and him, really).

She lavished it with her tongue, caressed the underside of the head, licked a stripe from the base to the tip...and then against a background of soft moans Nerevar was obviously trying to muffle, her hand's movement went unnoticed. He certainly noticed it when she traced the dampened slit of his cunt, though.

"Sadara--"

She didn't usually press for this--he preferred only letting Voryn touch him there. Not out of some shyness, but he did so love to be bred, and that wasn't something she could do.

"I can stop if you want me to," she replied, stroking briefly at his cock, "But I have one of these too, and...I'd like to see that what I know can...help you too."

"I'm sure it can't be very--"

"I can make you scream," she grinned, and gave the most seductive expression she could manage. "And Voryn really WILL hear us. Because what makes him come running faster than hearing you in need?"

"The both of us, but--" Nerevar had one golden arm up and over his eyes now. "Go ahead, you've made me wait long enough as it is."

Sadara smirked, slowly easing two fingers inside that soaked center. "Hot," she said, "And very wet. You're as eager as I am, aren't you?"

Any reply or retort Nerevar might have made was silenced when Sadara lowered her head, took his cock into her mouth completely, and at the same time buried her fingers in his cunt knuckle deep.

All that passed his lips was a strangled moan.

Not so chatty now, are you? she thought.

As big a game as he talked, he was so easy to reduce to this point. It was so easy to touch him in just the right ways and render him functionally mute.

His hand at the back of her head, the sudden grip of his fingers in her hair, and another groan as he started to buck against her head. Sadara went slack, letting him do it, letting him him have the control he so desperately seemed to crave.

Nerevar seemed to be saying something, but Sadara couldn't bring herself to care what it was. The feeling of his cock in her mouth, the slight saltiness of his pre, the stutter in his hips when her fingers pushed deep enough for her thumb to grind over his clit...

...it consumed her.

There was a high-pitched cry, a last buck of Nerevar's hips--and a shudder as his cock pulsed and filled her mouth. She swallowed down his seed quickly, spilling only a drop--a drop she wiped from her lips as she moved back up.

Her smirk was triumphant...until she felt a pair of hands at her waist.

"I see," came the sudden sound of Voryn's strained voice, "That I cannot leave the two of you alone for any amount of time without returning to a scene of utter debauchery."

Nerevar gestured and gave his reply in an airy voice. "You needed further proof after the last few times?"

Voryn's trimmed claws pricked at the soft skin on Sadara's waist, and she pressed back a bit, hoping to get things moving.

"Tell me, which of us did you hear?"

"Nerevar. Why?"

"We had a bit of a bet going..." Sadara glanced up at Nerevar. "And it looks like I won. I wonder if our dear Nerevar will have anything to say to that. Perhaps he'll just remain silent?"

"Perhaps he'll want to punish you for being so smug." The hands at her waist were caressing now, never going very far, but stoking the flames from her last peak. "Will you, Nerevar? Or will we let this little defiance go?"

"I think not." Nerevar lifted Sadara's chin, and gave a smirk of his own. That was his hortator voice, the one she'd ALSO come to love. Voryn had his thunderous tone of mock-anger, and Nerevar had this. "Voryn, I think we need to remind her not to lord things over those above her. To be a graceful winner...or loser, as it were."

He lay back again, and pulled her forward to lay atop him. His arms quickly moved tight around her, leaving her in just the right position to hear his whisper in her ear.

"Now, my dear, it is time for you to serve. Our lord has had a very stressful day, and he requires a means of...relief."

Oh, to be held like this, to be between them. This, this was heaven, and she needed no other. If it was a dream, all she wished was for it never to end.

"Then," she gave in a slightly edged tone, "Stop playing around and let me--"

"Such bossiness from an outlander...this will not stand. Voryn?"

The thrust that came next was completely unexpected, and had her whole body tense from the sudden intrusion and spread. Either that was part of a game the two others had already devised, or Voryn was skipping a few steps first. But then again, he'd never been a patient mer.

Sadara tried to stifle the moan that the movement forced from her throat, but it passed her lips anyway, and left her clenching at Nerevar's shoulders. "Gods..."

Nerevar tutted at her. "How many times do we have to remind you? There is only one god here, and you serve at his pleasure. You're only lucky he's eager to be relieved, or he would have spent time making you fall apart..."

Another thrust, another outcry--and then a steady jarring of her body as Voryn wordlessly started a brutal pace.

She couldn't speak, could barely think. Her pleasure rose in sharp spikes, each time she was stretched and spread around Voryn's cock. There was nothing of coherent thought at this point, only the eager insistent movement of his hips against hers and the ecstasy that followed.

"We're being so good to you," Nerevar said, drawing her into a brief kiss. "Poor, needy thing...do you know what I've noticed?"

"Wh...wh...oh!..."

"That you have all the same little weak points that I do." he smirked once more, and raised her just enough to start nipping love bites into the soft skin of her neck. The moan that followed had him grinning further, and he dragged his tongue over and around the same spots. "Oh, what a discovery..."

"Nerevar--" Voryn groaned and moved down, pressing Sadara down and leaving him face to face with Nerevar.

"What would my lord have of me, hm?"

(Here Sadara found herself, pressed between two men, two men she'd come to love at different points. One cock inside her, another beneath her and weeping pre onto her belly, and she had never felt so well satisfied as she did right then.)

"If you keep calling him your....oh, gods...your lord, you'll just hurry him into...mmm..."

"Oh no, no, no..." Nerevar laughed, and in a suddenly much darker and more alluring tone, added, "If I wanted to do that..."

A momentary stop, a further press--she couldn't exactly see what was going on, but from the sound of it, Nerevar had finally locked lips with Voryn.

The pleasurable movements slowed as her two loves kissed, but didn't stop entirely. But it left her more coherent than the savage pace from earlier.

"And you say what we were doing BEFORE was pure debauchery..." She could think of no more filthy thing that what was happening right now.

How long they stayed like this, none of them would be quite sure. Hands and mouths and teeth and tongues, stroking, caressing, kissing, loving. By the time Sadara felt her second peak approaching she was sure they'd never be able to top this moment. That nothing could ever be as enjoyable, as warm, as satisfying.

The end nearly leaped into her throat on a deep thrust, and she groaned right into Nerevar's ear.

"Harder," Nerevar suddenly demanded, "It was me that drew you in here, but it'll be her that actually screams tonight."

"Please," she called out, "Please, I'm so close..."

"Let her have it, Voryn," Nerevar said, "All of it. Her end, yours..."

And then a thrust that tore a genuine if well pleased scream from Sadara's lips.

"Are we going to let her take any story back to her forsaken outlander home that does not ensure your reputation?"

Closer, and closer still now.

"Or do you not want her every vein to thrum with desire because of you, o god of the mountain?"

Her eyes were clamped shut, so she didn't see which of them grabbed at her breasts, or her waist, or tilted her head to give them better access to her neck.

It didn't matter.

"Go on," she heard Nerevar whisper in her ear, "Come for us. Come for us."

The first wave of orgasm rose, and crashed on a final thrust from Voryn. Flame burst beneath her skin and spread in pure wildfire through the rest of her body--she screamed out her pleasure into the pillow beneath Nerevar's head. Then, finally, she relaxed.

A final thrust, and Voryn was pulsing and spilling inside her.

They lay there like that a minute or two, relaxing, breathing, recovering, really.

Not until they'd separated from one another and come back together--Sadara was kept pressed between them as they all lay down. Exhausted, but replete.

"If this is a dream I pray I never wake."

"No dreams," Voryn said.

"All of it, every bit...is real." Nerevar added that, and joined his free hand with Voryn's, which lay on Sadara's hip. "And we will NEVER be parted again."

[magical-soup]

Crushed and Aching, I Keep Going - Chapter 1 : Quiet Afternoon, not so quiet

Summary:

In a world unfair, people get hurt. Unable to wipe all pain, healing is required. As difficult as that is, one must try; with the help of supportive companions, they can heal.

It was just meant to be a quiet afternoon, how did he get here? Panic courses through his stinging skin and everything hurts, too bad his brain will never let him rest…

Or; Grian has a flashback but Impulse and Scar arrive to support him, turning a terrifying afternoon into a calm, cozy one.

This series is posted both on tumblr and AO3; here is the AO3 link for those who want that:

https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/152699971?show_comments=true&view_full_work=false#main

Notes:

Me? Projecting? NOPE! Idk what ur talking about pffff not me must be someone else hahaha… I gave them all trauma so now they have to deal with it :b L

This fic has age regression, that is when someone mentally regresses to an earlier developmental stage, it is SFW and healthy. If it makes you uncomfortable, leave.

Also, any time bird, fledgling, nestling, avian, or chick is used it is referring to Grian.

TW: Flashbacks, panic attacks, swearing, self harm(hitting, biting), germaphobia/contagous OCD, guilt for being scared, grief, guilt, suicidal ideation.

The scary sections with be marked with ‘#’ and end with ‘#^’

~ ~ ~

#

It was just meant to be a quiet afternoon. The waves crash along the shore and clouds slowly pass by. A bell rang in the distance, disturbed by the sea breeze; the tune was… familiar. Why did it-

Grian was terrified. “Terrified” was the biggest understatement the world could give. Shaking, the small bird shuddered as the panic pierced his skin, lighting him aflame. It hurt… so bad, and yet, he kept quiet.

“It’s irrational, just be rational.” They told him. They didn’t understand… they couldn’t. He wished it could stop, he wished he could make all the pain and suffering and panic disappear in an instant and it would all be over. He wished so much more than they could possibly imagine or even be willing to believe. They wanted his behavior to stop–his visible attempts to seek the smallest form of relief–it annoyed them. He couldn’t stop, it was all he had, all he could do. He was so much more helpless than they could comprehend. They were annoyed, he was so much more than annoyed; he wanted it to end so badly.

The endless fear, all controlling, consumed his every moment. It pulled at him like a puppet, tugging at his very soul to force him to action. He couldn’t stop it, no matter how much he tried, no matter how much he repeated their words in his head, it was useless. He wanted to cry, he needed to cry, but his eyes never let him. His cruel dry eyes.

The avian shuddered, air struggling to get to his heaving lungs. His throat tightening with each panicked breath. Gasping for air, his chest ached from his overinflated lungs. Attempting to silence the agonizing pictures that intruded his thoughts, Grian slammed his fists against the splintered wood of his fishing dock, wincing yet savoring the pain.

Painfully unnerving touch crawled up his skin, sending waves of panic and flashes of memories. No, no-no-no not again!- “SHUT UP!” a scream burst through the air, but Grian was far too panicked to care. Thrashing about wildly, he found himself tumbling to the ground in his fishing dock, his flailing legs thrusting him as deep into the corner of barrels as physically possible.

Frustration peaks, and in the wave of desperation his teeth find themselves sinking into the flesh of his left forearm. His jaw clenched painfully, letting out heaves of tension in one deep bite. It hurt, hell it hurt, but Grian was desperate for more relief. Even after his lips unsuctioned from his skin and the bruise was sure to sting, the lingering fear urged to be released.

White-knuckle fists slam themselves into his skull mercilessly, desperate and angry. Each pang only added to the frustration, refusing to satisfy like the bite; yet, the frantic swings kept crashing until his head ached and regret replaced adrenalin.

Ramming himself somehow further into the corner, the avian curled into a ball, a shaking, hyperventilating ball. He looked like a mess, a stupid ugly mess, covered in scratch marks and saliva. His dirt dusted wings sloppily hug his pathetic form, hiding his mess of an image with dull primary colors.

… Stupid bell… why’d it have to be there… just to ruin his day… fuck…

… dumb…dumb dumb dumb… Just!-... ugh…

A sudden touch placed on his left shoulder sent a wicken flinch through Grian. In an instant, a yelping growl escaped his lurching lungs before his blurry eyes could even process the figure crouched before him. His legs, bent to his chest almost like a shield, jutted out in an attempt to jump away, yet the wall of barrels behind him kept him stationary, resulting in his sharp talons merely scraping against the wooden shack floor.

There, crouched in front of him, was a familiar face. Impulse… Wait, FUCK! “No-no-no-no-” Grian mumbled out loud as he desperately tried to hide himself, covering his body with his wings and arms in some strange hope that it would make him disappear from this reality. “I’m sorry- sorry- I’m sorry- I-I- s-sorr-”

#^

“No need to apologize.” a soft whisper tore him from his winding thoughts. Peeking through his tangled limbs and colorful feathers, Grian sent a barely trusting glance towards the imp. “You aren’t doing anything wrong, Grian.”

Grian slowly lowered his puffed-up wings; though, keeping them tightly wrapped around his shaking body like a warm blanket.

Impulse settled calmly in front of him, sitting criss-cross on the worn wood planks. “Let’s just breathe, okay? Can you breathe with me?” Impulse asked gently. Grian cautiously nodded in response, keeping a watchful eye on the imp. Impulse then slowly lifted his hands as if he were lifting a box, deeply breathing in while he did so.

“Hold” Impulse instructed, holding his breath and pausing his hands. Grian attempted to mimic the pattern, but struggled as his lungs involuntarily heaved with fear. Predictably, Impulse’s chest deflated as he exhaled, lowering his hands along with it.

Grian, still choking on air, fluffed up his feathers in frustration, but pushed on, following instructions as the exercise repeated. Impulse didn’t show any judgment or disgust, sweetly praising the bird with each successful heave of breath.

Once steady breath met his thankful lungs, Grian took a careful shuffle closer to his friend. Small but purposeful. Impulse stayed put at his settled placement, not daring to rush the avian. Though adrenaline still rushed through his veins, Grian relaxed, stepping closer to the warm demon and waving his wings stimming.

A warm floatiness buzzed in his body, anxious but drawn to the soft comfort that always accompanied Impulse. Soon, Grian found himself climbing into Impulse’s arms, wrapping two shivering arms around the other’s torso and tucking his chin under the other’s. “Thanks…” Grian whispered, thankful.

Impulse returned the hug, engulfing the little avian in soft, cozy comfort. “No problem, G.” A clawed hand gently traced simple shapes on Grian’s back through his jumper, careful to not disturb any of the preciously aligned feathers that lined his spine.

It was warm here, comforting and safe. A bubbly fuzz began to soak into Grian’s whelmed brain, sleepy and calm. Grian melted into Impulse’s tender touch, sinking into the warm feeling. Impulse started rocking them both back and forth, slow and easy like the clear waves that splashed upon the fishing dock only feet away. Grian hummed to the movement, babbling mindlessly.

After a while of settling into the cozy small fluffiness that filled his body, Impulse spoke up, “Hey, birdy? How old are you?” Grian’s head, filled with cotton fluff, finally lifted itself from the soft pillow that was Impulse’s shoulder.

Grian sleepily blinked at the imp, soon bringing up his left hand and seemingly fidgeting with his fingers. “Hmm…” he mumbled as he thought, eventually bringing up three fingers and showing them to Impulse.

Impulse gazed at Grian with the greatest fondness the world could give, nothing but love in his eyes. “Small huh? That’s okay, lil’ birdy.” The imp tucked Grian closer then calmly brushed a few wild strands of blonde hair out of Grian’s face, combing through his unbrushed locks. The fledgling made a small sound of surprise from the sudden affection, scrunching up his face in response.

Impulse giggled at the adorable sound, cooing at the little. “Aww, so cute.” Brain fogged by fluff and smallness, Grian could only stick his tongue out in defense, lightly flapping his wings to further emphasize his disagreement with the statement.

This only encouraged Impulse further. “Oh, just a little baby, aren’t you?” A small boop to his nose and Grian was defeated. The cozy cotton fluff and increasing smallness made the fledgling clueless on how to counter this. He resorted to hiding his blushing face in Impulse's chest, which unfortunately only resulted in more cooing. “Oh, it’s okay, sweety. No need to hide.” Grian let out a small whine, bapping Impulse on the face to signal him to stop, all while muffling his incoherent babbles and tiny stims.

Impulse finally stopped, returning to simply rocking them gently and taking in the calm tunes of the waves. A salty breeze flew by, ruffling Grian’s soft feathers, forcing a small whine of the discomforted little. “Hmm, how about we go somewhere else, huh?” Impulse suggested, to which Grian subtly nodded in response. “Let’s go to my base, okay? It’s nice and warm there.”

“I’m gonna lift you up, is that okay?” Impulse checked. The little gave a small thumbs up before clinging onto the imp’s shirt. “Alright. Three… two… one-” Grian was swiftly scooped up and lifted while Impulse stood, bottom supported by the imp’s strong arms, his dark bird-like legs wrapped around Impulse’s waist.

After adjusting the positions slightly, Impulse asked gently, “Are you comfy?” A small “m-hm” and then the two were off, moving down the dirt road at a calm walking pace. Grian observed over Impulse’s shoulder, the waves of the bay began to get farther and farther away as the two hybrids walked off of Grian’s dock and onto the dirt path connecting all of the hermits’ bases together.

Grian rested his chin on Impulse's shoulder, relaxing in the fluff that consumed his head as they continued down the dirt road towards Impulse’s glowy livingquarters hidden within the cyberpunk city. Gem’s parrot’s squawked at each other from the wires strewn above them, Grian squawked back. A subtle tune slipped its way out Impulse’s lips as he hummed a sweet melody. Eyelids growing heavier with each step, Grian sunk deeper into the cozy warmth that radiated from his imp friend and finally slipped into the sweet sleep that had clung to him.

~ ~ ~

Cozy, soft warmth enveloped the sleepy hermit, the scent of fresh cooking driving him to wake. Grian’s eyes, barely open and heavy with sleep, gazed over the room. He was on a large full bed, covered in a pile of thick blankets, and settled into a mountain of pillows and plushies. A strange bud sat in his mouth; it didn’t bother Grian though as he mindlessly chewed on the soft silicone. Lifting his head up, Grian sniffed the air like a cartoon character, the savory smell of vegetables and starches filling his nose.

Urged out of this cozy heaven, the little bird wiggled his way out of the maze of blankets and began to wander towards the smell of fresh cooking. Grian slid off the bed and waddled out the open door into the bright hallway. Finding himself on slippery tile, Grian jumped back to the safe, grippy carpet of the bedroom with a whimper.

His dark eyes stared down the cruel flooring. The little found a solution by crawling, lowering himself to the ground and slowly exploring the environment on four limbs. Now in the lit hallway, Grian realized that he was dressed in an unfamiliar onesie. The fabric was a bright blue, patterned with many small parrots. The texture of the loose pajamas was soft, pleasant to rub his fingers with.

The baby bird, head swarmed with fluff and cotton, giggled and bounced with joy from this newfound discovery. ‘They look like me! They look like me! The little birdies!’ he thought in his fuzz filled head. Flapping his wings and hands about, his noisy behavior attracted a lovely friend.

The curious yet kind cat, Jellie, gracefully strutted down the hall, soon followed by Scar rolling after her. The warm kitty rubbed her head against Grian’s knee, producing a subtle purr at the small hermit. “Hello there!” Scar greeted his little. “You are very brave for exploring out here all on your own, silly bird.” Grian gaped up at his best friend with wonder, the words not processing through his fog filled brain.

Sucking on his pacifier, the tiny parrot made grabby hands at Scar, which unfortunately resulted in a sad yet fond expression to possess the vex. “Sorry, darling, but I don’t have the strength to hold you.” Scar began to mess with something in the bag that laid in his lap. “How about this? We can play a fun game instead!” Scar’s face changed to one of joy and surprise as he pulled out a soft toy. A floppy purple plush resembling a monkey dangled with Scar’s hand as he held it out in front of the fledgling.

Grian’s eyes lit up with excitement as he leaned forward, immediately attempting to grab the plush, just out of reach. Scar began to roll backwards, guiding Grian with the fun toy towards the main room and out of the dusty, barren hallway.

Finally managing to latch onto the monkey, Grian pulled it into his chest, hugging the cuddly plush as tightly as he could. Grian giggled at the beloved toy, flapping and stimming his limbs in joy. Then, a rude cooing sounded from his surroundings, “Aww, what a cute baby.” Scar commented. Blushing at this interruption, Grian looked up to face the rude audience.

Scar gazed at him sweetly, babying the little bird greatly. “Are you just so cute, with your little monkey!” The vex proceeded to make high-pitched incoherent sounds of cuteness aggression, lightly waving his leathery wings and stimming with his hands. Grian blew raspberries at Scar in defense before huffing and turning away, keeping his prized possession secured in his arms.

A ray of sunshine caught Grian’s attention, the little suddenly distracted. Finally noticing that he was in a new environment, Grian glanced around with wonder. Gaping at the sunlit furniture, the curious avian crawled around the room, dragging around his purple friend Floppy of course. The baby hermit, filled with child-like curiosity, felt every interesting texture and surface that his little hands could touch: the rough rug, the yellow leather couch, the thin gray curtains, everything! It was all so interesting!

In his fixated exploration, he didn’t notice the fluffy feline that followed him closely. A loud meow called from behind him and a gray tabby soon appeared in his vision. “Kitty!” Grian babbled into his pacifier. The fledgling waved Floppy in greeting, letting the loose plush flail playfully. Jellie made a sound of interest, soon batting at the drooping object. Giggling with delight, Grian swung the cute plush, tempting the gray cat all around the gray rug.

Sweet muddled whispers of a distant conversation came from behind a deepslate island in the kitchen. Now entranced with the interesting noises, Grian found himself wandering towards the source of the sound, which also happened to lead to the source of the lovely smell that filled his senses. Crawling off the soft rug onto cold tile, the avian turned the corner around the island, catching sight of a tall imp adorning a yellow apron and an exhausted looking vex sitting in his wheelchair beside him.

“Well the food is almost done. Uh, how is G doing?” Impulse asked as he stirred the pot on the stove.

Scar fidgeted with a small toy in his hands, a purple and cyan square pop-it. “He’s doing okay. Haven’t noticed anything concerning at all, just very small and curious as always.” He said calmly, not looking up from the fidget toy.

The two much mentally older were busy with their discussion, too busy to see the regressed Grian, who decided to make this into a spy mission. He hid behind the island, obscuring himself from view, and hugging Floppy to his chest, secretly listening in on the garble of words that seemed to pass through his head, holding no true meaning.

Impulse shifted his weight on his feet. “Is Jellie getting along with him?”.

“Yeah!” Scar glanced up at the cooking imp with a bright smile. “She is being very nice to him, sweet as always.”

Scar’s face turned red and he dropped his head. With slight hesitation and a stutter, Scar asked just above a whisper, “Do you think she knows? Like- with what’s happening?” he mumbled something about animals having sixth senses while looking to the side in embarrassment.

Impulse cocked his head in fondness and slight confusion. “Yeah, probably. Animals are usually nicer to regressors when they’re small.”

Scar stiffened, realizing the misunderstanding. “No-no-no! Yeah-yeah- with the regressors and stuff, but I mean with how… my body’s been… y’know.” Scar waved his hands about as if to explain what he meant.

“Oh, OH! Yeah, yes, definitely!” Impulse blurted out. “You know how, like, service dogs work. They have cat ones too!–Service cats. So she can probably tell with her super strong cat senses.”

Scar tilted his head fondly, a sad yet pleased smile marking his expression. “Yeah… I think so too.” The vex then peered over the counter into the living room, spotting said cat busy grooming herself. He also noticed the lack of a certain feathered baby, suddenly tensing up and wheeling around the end of the island opposite from Grian.

A nervous laugh made its way out of Scar’s lips “Uh-huh-uh- Grian!” he called out. A giggle was heard around the counter. Impulse glanced at the bird’s super good hiding spot–a smile pierced his face as he joined in on the game, copying Grian when he looked up at him and put his finger to his lips. Scar, oblivious to the amazing hide-&-seek player, searched the living room with worry building in his gut.

The tiny bird peeked his head out from behind the counter–the hider and the seeker met glances. The feathered fledgling quickly crawled back behind the island, unable to control his fit of giggles from the anticipation. His wings waved sloppily behind him with the excitement of his “mission”, a mess of feathers painted a mix of primary colors flapping uncontrollably. The little fledgling attempted to grab at the wiggly limbs, not wanting to give away his location, but it was an unfortunate struggle. He twisted into contortions that you would assume to be painful if it wasn’t Grian.

As the sound of rubber wheels rolled up next to him, Grian flopped, defeated, on the tile. “Grian? What are you doing hiding here, baby? You nearly gave me a heart attack.” Scar said as he rolled up next to him and set a grounding hand on Grian’s shoulder.

“Was playing super spy.” Grian mumbled into the red pacifier, chewing on the bud to loosen the frustrated tension that had built with his failure. “You found me.” he muttered, disappointed. The little playfully danced his purple plushy in front of himself, letting its limbs flop around lazily.

Scar noticed the sad expression that rested on the avian’s teary face. “Well that’s okay, darling. You sure gave me a fright so I’d call that a success.” he attempted to cheer up the little, slowly rubbing the avian’s back in affection.

Suddenly, The electric stove whined loudly when the water boiled over the edge of the pot. Impulse let out a shocked shriek as he frantically pressed buttons on the stove in a panic, desperate to stop the blaring alarm.

Grian yelped in surprise, quickly covering his ears to muffle the noise. Everything was moving so fast and so loud, Grian wasn’t prepared. His head was running with panic and thoughts and everything was far too overwhelming to do anything about it-...

#

… He was back there again, back in that classroom. Shaking so hard, it’s shockingly sad to hear that it went unnoticed. The teacher spoke to the class, Grian wasn’t part of them. His eyes were glassy and filled with a level of fear his peers couldn’t comprehend. He had held his breath so long that it hurt, but he was too scared to let go, to breathe in the contaminated air. His skin felt wrong, every part of him felt wrong.

‘It’s fine, you’re ok’ he tried to tell himself. It failed against the all encompassing panic. His chest ached and heaved, ribs crying out in pain. He couldn’t give them relief, he would rather sacrifice his lungs than give in and breathe in the worst substance.

He wanted to cry, but he couldn’t, not in front of his worst enemy. He would rather die, but he couldn’t die while contaminated. His mind tempted him anyway, filling his thoughts with various methods. ‘Out the window, the height might be enough to finally escape this hell.’ Muscles tensed so hard that they were constantly sore. ‘The highway is only about two miles from your house, you could walk there easily. The cars going 55 miles per hour won’t stop for you, it would definitely kill you.’ Sweat dripped from his forehead, he couldn’t wipe it. He couldn’t touch anything, he was infected, hands and arms covered in an imaginary disease. ‘That large bottle of pain pills at home is probably enough to kill you.’ He was covered, head to toe in the terrifying substance. He was paralyzed, he couldn’t dare move, couldn’t risk touching anything else, infecting it, getting covered and contaminated further.

#^

Grian was curled into a tight stiff ball, almost motionless except for the shivering and desperate gasps that escaped from his choking throat. Discarded on the ground, the red pacifier was dirtied alongside the purple monkey. The beeping had finally stopped but the boy sitting in the kitchen still resembled a terrified mannequin. Subtly shaking and sweating bullets, his black eyes were covered in a glassy filter and a thousand-yard stare.

“Grian? Grian, can look at me?” Impulse pleaded, crouched before the frozen little. Beside him, Scar was searching through his bag for any little gear or stim toys that could help. “Lil’ birdy? It’s okay, you’re safe here.” Impulse tried to calm the avian, with no success.

Suddenly, Scar pulled out a blue pacifier, decorated with waves and shiny white gems. Along with the paci came a bright green and yellow rattler, already making noise with the movement of being dragged out.

Carefully, Scar slowly brought the rattler in front of the boy’s face, shaking it lightly. The noise seemed to help, Grian blinking rapidly and twitching his head. After a few more shakes of the instrument, the fledgling finally raised his head, facing the brightly colored item with cautious curiosity.

Grian’s dark eyes were still distant, seemingly peering off somewhere else, but the fog was slowly clearing.

“Hey,” Impulse whispered as if talking any higher would break him. “You’re okay. You’re safe.” Impulse tried to bring the other to a feeling of safety, but this only seemed to drive him to anger.

Eyebrows scrunched up and knit together, Grian glared at Impulse with an unknown fury. “No… no I’m not.” his voice was scratched and torn, almost like he was sick.

#

He was sick–sick of people telling him to ‘just stop’ and to ‘just get over it, already’. He was sick–terribly sick–and not just tired: crushingly exhausted. He was trying, he was trying so hard…

He wasn’t safe, they couldn’t understand. They couldn’t ever…

He wanted to cry, he wanted to scream, he wanted to let out his years of frustration and fear in one ear bleeding screech. But he couldn’t, not to his friends, not to anyone. It wasn’t their fault that they weren’t educated on it, that they didn’t know. It wasn’t anyone’s fault, not even his own, yet he still struggled to believe that. How was it not his fault, he didn’t tell them!... couldn’t…he couldn’t. No matter how much he wanted to, he couldn’t. Not with the alexithymia, lack of understanding, helplessness, and petrifying fear. He couldn’t–even when he wanted to, even when he needed to.

He had worked so hard, so, SO hard to get better, to tell people. But the ache in his chest continued to stab at him after all these years. Made of fear and guilt, it ate at him, chewing at his hope and determination, crushing him down to ash. Down to ash like Evo…

…Evo, destroyed, turned into nothing by those… creatures…

If only he had shut up!–maybe it wouldn’t have happened… fuck… stupid Grian- stupid Xelqu-... How dare they name him that–after those terrible gods. Just for some “motivation”–bullshit! He knew what it really was. Those bastards.

If only they had felt how cold the void was, knew the pain he felt after the massacre they did on his body, maybe they wouldn’t have done it. Maybe they would have stopped. But of course they didn’t–what did he expect? That terrible cold ink, all for nothing… just for pain…

He wished he had died then, or when he had thought about it at the worst of his teenage years. Maybe then, he wouldn’t have had to suffer as much; he wouldn’t have to suffer now. Maybe his family would have been better off without him. If he’d committed to chugging those pills they wouldn’t have had to be so bothered by his disgusting existence. They would have been saved without him.

…and maybe Evo would still be around… without him…

“What do you mean by that, Grian?” Scar had asked, followed by an awkward silence of concerned glances and patience.

The question finally processed through the blurry confusing mess that filled Grian’s head. “I-... I-” he couldn't answer.

His lip quivered, yet he swallowed the sobs that rose in his throat. Grian buried his red face in his knees, hiding from the terrifying world. Stupid fire alarm… dumb cold void… A sudden anger boiled up as an image of those… creatures… flashed through his mind. Grian shook his head as if to push away the intrusive thought.

A wave of grief shoved him under, drowning him in anger and ache. His fist tightened, lightly punching his leg with angst. “Ugh!...” Grian groaned from the bubbling emotions, whimpering with each pang that wracked his soul.

“Hey, it’s okay. No one’s mad at you.” Impulse reassured gently, resting a grounding hand on his shoulder.

Grian took a moment to breath before slowly shuffling closer to the imp and taking in the warm hug that Impulse always promised to provide. Those large, strong arms didn’t lie, creating a secure, comfortable embrace around the avian.

“I’m sorry.” Grian clung closer, hiding his shame by burying his terrified expression in Impulse’s chest. His wings tucked tightly to his back, fingers grasping the fabric of the demon’s shirt.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for. It’s not your fault.” Impulse whispered as if it was as easy as breathing. Calmly petting Grian’s beige locks as if he didn’t just say the most painfully kind words that Grian has heard in a long… long time.

Dry sobs wracked through his aching body. The words were so kind… it opened a deep wound carved into by years of agony. “Why’d it have to happen!” Grian yelled into Impulse’s chest as he lightly punched into the imp’s back. “Why…” he whispered, softer.

Scar rubbed his back, soft and gentle, “There is no good reason, darling. You didn’t deserve it, either way.” Scar answered, as if it was so simple. And it hurt… it hurt so bad.

#^

Angry fists tensed with each rhetorical question and long-aching grief that passed through his body. Waves crashed against his amygdala, foaming and breaking with each splash. It hurt. Impulse just simply shushed him quietly and rubbed his back gently, holding him closely–no judgment. The blurry fog began to creep back into his head, drinking in the taste of emotions and shrinking smaller at the warm, soft touches that promised safety and support.

Soft fur brushed up against Grian’s hip, purring, concerned. Grian peek out from the sanctuary he built in Impulse’s chest to look at the cat who yearned to comfort. A small hand cautiously reached out towards Jellie, gently brushing the gray fur lining her back. The feline rubbed into his hand, basking in the pets. The edge’s of his lips curled upwards slightly, smiling at the gesture.

A soft rattle shook from nearby–a brightly colored rattle was held up in front of Grian’s face. Impulse gently shook the toy, making the beads inside the rattle shuffle about, clinking together and creating an interesting noise.

The small boy carefully reached his shaky hands out towards the rattler, taking hold of the handle and inspecting the colorful instrument. He waved it about wildly to make it rattle but his loose grip on the toy caused it to get launched across the floor.

Impulse was quick to the rescue, fetching the toy for his sweet bird swiftly and returning it without hesitation. The tiny chick let out a high pitched chirp, clenching his fists tightly around the handle of the wooden rattle. He shook it aggressively, inspecting the toy intently, trying to explore the mystery of the toy.

“Do you like the toy?” Impulse asked with a welcoming smile. Grian nodded rapidly, excited to share his joy. “That’s great! Now can you tell Impy how old you are?”

Grian was feeling smaller by the second with how his brain was trying to cope–a bubbly playfulness to replace the consuming panic. He wasn’t very good at pin-pointing his mental age–it just felt like a heavy fog and simple smallness. Unable to give a number, Grian just shrugged in response. “I dunno.” he answered, slurring his words sloppily.

“That’s okay.” Impulse responded calmly, a gentleness easily present in his voice. Grian made a hushed “Sorry…” as he pressed his face into Impulse’s chest, quietly shaking the rattle close to his ears as an auditory stim. “Hey…” Impulse remarked, “There’s nothing to be sorry for, you did nothing wrong, little one.” He sweetly brushed through Grian’s hair, knowing just how much the avian liked it.

The little stayed hiding in the imp’s arms; though, he soon found interest in placing the wooden rattle into his mouth. “Ah-ah, no, we don’t chew on our toys.” Impulse gently moved the toy out of Grian’s mouth. “Here.” He replaced it with a blue, ocean-themed pacifier, sliding the teet into Grian’s mouth and clipping it to the collar of his blue onesie. Impulse was beaming afterwards at the adorable sight. “Oh, aren't you so adorable, with your little onesie and paci. How cute, so tiny.” he cooed. Grian blabbled nonsensically around the silicone teet, waving the rattle with delight.

“Now, my little birdy, I heard that there’s a delicious bowl of food waiting for you in the living room. It’s much more comfy in there, too.” Impulse explained with a sweet excitement in his voice. Grian glanced over to the living room at the mention of it, leaning out of Impulse’s arms somewhat to get a better look. Sitting on the coffee table, a steaming bowl of veggies cooled with a spoon poked into the food. Scar was relaxing in his wheelchair beside it, yawning widely and sleepily adjusting his vex wings.

Impulse interrupted Grian’s observing, “Do you wanna walk there yourself or do you want me to pick you up?” The words barely made a crumb of sense to his distracted, fluff filled brain, but the words “pick you up” stood out like a shiny gem in the sea of gibberish. The little immediately clung closer to the imp, bouncing with joy and babbling incoherently as he waited impatiently to be lifted up by his beloved caregiver.

“Okay-Okay-!” Impulse understood the excitement, quickly securing the avian in his arms and standing up. Grian giggled wildly as the imp playfully bounced the little in his arms and walked over into the living room, the little waving at Jellie as she followed close behind.

Impulse sat down carefully on the leather couch, settling the fledgling into his lap. The little bird failed to stay still, wiggling about in anticipation. Grian shook his hands with pure joy when Impulse returned Floppy to his arms, fondly nuzzling the plush while shaking his rattle wildly. Giggling with delight, he was completely distracted from his past angst.

Scar had busied himself with choosing a kid appropriate show to watch–scanning through the Disney program–while calmly petting the gray feline that laid comfortably in his lap. A song began to play from the television when Scar finally decided on a show. Brightly colored dogs danced around for the intro of the show; the title of the show in big bold text at the end of the tune, “Bluey”. Grian was apparently hypnotized by these vibrant colors and catchy tunes, staring at the screen fixated.

“Are you ready to eat now?” Impulse asked, peering down at the little in his arms. The small hermit stared back, taking a moment to process the words in his baby brain. Finally understanding the question, the fledgling jumped around in his caregiver’s arms, so excited to finally eat the food that he had been sniffing since he awakened. Impulse watched his precious little with affection, smiling widely at the cuteness.

“This meal is a bit messy, so do you think you’ll need your bib?” Impulse asked, grabbing a red bib from the cushion beside them and holding it up in front of Grian. The little squeezed his eyes shut as he contemplated, using all the big thinking he could find in his foggy head. After a minute of tough thinking, Grian opened his eyes and nodded his head confidently, grabbing at the bib.

“Okay-okay- no need to rush.” Impulse assured, giggling at the excitement as he carefully attached the bib around Grian’s neck, securing it with a small ‘click’ of the plastic mechanism on the back.

Impulse leaned forward and grabbed the bowl sitting atop the coffee table, carefully stabilizing it in his hand before readjusting his position to better accommodate for the new task. He sweetly removed the blue paci from Grian’s mouth and letting it hang from the clip.

Scooping up a bite of hot carrots with the spoon, he started waving the utensil in front of Grian’s face. “Here comes the airplane!” The imp created a “Brr” sound while moving the spoon closer to Grian’s mouth. “Say ah!” Impulse instructed as the “airplane” approached his lips.

Opening his jaw, Grian’s taste buds were soon consumed with a warm delicious flavor. He closed his eyes and hummed as he chewed on the soft food. When he swallowed the bite of carrots, Impulse gently combed through his messy hair. Grian sloppily flapped his wings to let out his happiness.

Another fresh spoonful of sweet potatoes and veggies was soon “flying” towards his lips, quickly being eaten up and enjoyed by the hungry fledgling. He licked up the bits that had missed his mouth before the next “airplane” took off, soaring directly into his munchy maw. This delicious game continued until the bowl was scraped clean of warm veggies and Grian’s stomach was warm and satisfied.

A napkin batted at the fledgling’s face, cleaning off the mess of stray crumbs and veggie juice. The nestling whined at the unwelcome fabric, scrunching up his face in defense; luckily, the napkin was quick to leave, done with its job.

“Good job, G!” Impulse praised. A ‘click’ was heard behind Grian’s head as the bib was removed from his neck. The avian went to bring his pacifier up to his mouth when Impulse nudged him lightly. “Are you thirsty, bud?” he asked. Grian blinked sleepily at him for a moment before nodding slowly.

The imp reached over to Scar, who passed his Grian’s baby bottle from his bag, and quietly handed the bottle to the little. Watching the water swish around inside, the fledgling realized how dehydrated he was. Lifting the teet to his lips, the baby quickly latched onto the nipple, suckling in sips of cold, refreshing water.

The bird relaxed into the imp’s arms–comfy and safe in this delicate care–slowly drinking his water while returning his attention to the cartoon playing on the TV. Body feeling properly hydrated and soothed, the little gently settled the bottle in his lap and placed his pacifier in his mouth, gnawing on the teet calmly.

On the illuminated screen, the cartoon characters went about their episodic shenanigans. Grian didn’t really bother paying any attention to the colorful canines–he could barely even keep his eyes open with how sleepy he was–merely subconsciously chewing on his pacifier and lazily flopping Floppy around in his hand. A large yawn made its way through his throat, making the sleepy boy drop his paci. He sleepily gaped at it before sleepily returning it to his lips.

The mentally older hermits, noticing his exhaustion, shared a glance at each other. Scar started “Hey, baby bird?” He reached his arm out and nudged Grian’s shoulder to get his attention. The baby bird barely had the energy to move his head to face him. “You tired?” Scar asked, already knowing the answer. If Grian wasn’t so deep in babyspace, he would have protested at assumption. Instead, he sleepily blinked at the vex, nodding while lazily rubbing his eyes.

A voice behind him spoke softly, “Well, it looks like it’s bedtime for this little one.” Impulse teased, getting ready to bring the little to bed.

Grian whined loudly, using the last of his energy to clumsily climb Impulse’s body to complain into his chest and cling to him sleepily. “Not bedtime.” he mumbled, sleep dripping from his words and melting his tired body.

“Well, at least take your anxiety meds, first.” Scar urged, passing over a small baggy that he’d packed to the also exhausted imp that held the avian. Impulse carefully took out one of the small white pills from the baggy and grabbed Grian’s water bottle in his other hand before gently nudging the whiny little in his arms. Grian wasn’t too pouty about taking his med, quickly swallowing the pill with a fresh gulp of water provided by the help of Impulse.

The little chick was so terribly sleepy, he was truly helpless when Impulse lifted him up- up- and away. Grian quietly protested as he was carried past the dozens of pictures hung in the hallway and into the dimly lit bedroom. But once he was settled sweetly into the bundle of soft blankets and squishy pillows, Grian grew quiet, growing too sleepy in the warm, low-light environment.

The nestling used all the strength that he could manage to limply grab at Impulse’s hand, begging him to stay. The imp fell for the puppy dog eyes, slipping into the bed with Grian and cuddling up close with the little. Grian, cozy in his cocoon, melted into the warmth that was Impulse, his kind caregiver. He snuggled into his arms and made small chirps as his eyes shut close.

As the tender kiss pressed to his forehead, Grian drifted off to sleepy town, content and cozy in his caregiver’s arms.

~ ~ ~

Notes:

This series has been months in the works. All chapters are around 5k words just like this chapter; I hope to upload them 1 chapter every 2 weeks.

This took so long to write, but I was so fixated on it I couldn’t stop writing. I made this almost entirely at school D: homework is for noobs anyway, fanfiction is for life B).

Hope you enjoyed :D! Feedback is appreciated, please leave any mistakes I may have made in the comments.