#idk what to call this au .

[fishbloc]

ashes to ashes, dust to dust

[wimsiecal]

Maybe 2020 me was cooking something

[insinirate]

be not afraid

[phrysic]

bad son good son

[eggcats]

Still thinking about this post bc these two morons have taken over my mind.

And I'm just like. Even after the revelation that Alastor thinks Vox is attractive, and even AS Vox is trying to get this idiot oblivious deer to realize he likes him, Alastor doesn't really change how he treats Vox. Like, at all.

The only change is that now part of his mockery is calling him stupid for not realizing that he's the most eligible demon in hell, lmao (he didn’t realize Vox didn't already know, how stupid of him).

He still likes picking fights and actually fighting him for real. (It's Fun and Entertaining - and for him, nothing has changed that would make him stop)

And I'm kind of thinking that THIS, and not everything else, is what makes Vox realize that Alastor ISN'T mocking him about this. He's serious. Because surely if this was an entire plot to make fun of him, Alastor would at least ATTEMPT to woo him properly before he pulls out the rug from under him, right? He wouldn't just continue on with his day as if he didn't just upend Vox's entire afterlife.

Like, maybe after the first conversation, and after Vox powers back on, he's hopeful, but he knows both what he looks like and what ALASTOR'S like, so he kind of just assumes that Alastor has figured out his less than 100% rival feelings towards him and decided to add it to his mockery.

But then he shows up the next day, determined to beat Alastor at his own game (he will PRETEND to be wooed and then throw it back on him when Alastor tries to mock him, it'll surely work! Totally). And Alastor is like, "Why are YOU back here?!" And doesn't even act any different towards Vox than he did the day before the Revelation.

And Vox is like. Oh, fuck. He was serious.

Suddenly, Vox realizes that, rather than the Normal Hell he THOUGHT he lived in (one where Alastor makes fun of his crush on him) he lives in Weird Hell, where now he has to somehow convince Alastor that he just, is attracted to him and NOT that everyone, somehow, is just. In love with him? Or something??? (What the Fuck?)

There are times when he's tired of fighting with Alastor about this, that a part of him wishes he DID live in Normal Hell, because at least he'd know what to do. (It's not like Val doesn't ALSO mock his crush on Alastor, he at least knows how to respond to THAT).

Even when he convinces Alastor to date him (to make everyone (who doesn't exist, by the way) jealous), Alastor still barely treats him any different. He still pokes and teases at Vox, even as he is (seemingly unintentionally) complimenting him.

One time, Alastor is like, "We haven't fought in ages, we should do that the next time we plan an outing!"

Vox, about to lose it because he had just NOW thought he understood what was going on: What the fuck??! I thought we were dating, why do you still want to kill me?!

Alastor: Dear, we've never been trying to kill each other! If we were, one of us would be dead, ha ha! This is entertainment, pure and simple!

(Translation: Alastor is bored and requires enrichment in his enclosure).

And now Vox has to now grapple with the fact that Alastor apparently saw fighting with him as fun, and not, y'know, rivals legitimately trying to kill one another. What.

--

Also, Valentino notices very quickly the sudden change in Vox's demeanor - usually when they fight, Vox doesn't take long before coming to him for forgiveness. Or, the few times he doesn't, Val doesn't have any difficulties changing Vox's mind (and getting Vox to buy him whatever he wants).

So, when Val decides that if Vox is going to stay pissy about his little comment, he'll "apologize" - ("Come on, amorcito, you know you're the only one for me! Those whores mean nothing compared to you!") But Vox, just, doesn't forgive him and go back to his arms. And Valentino is at a loss.

He LOSES it when he finds out Vox has been hanging at that shitty hotel and chasing that radio bastard (again!). He doubles his efforts of letting Vox know there is absolutely No Way Alastor cares for him at all, let alone as much as Valentino does!

And then Vox and Alastor are dating, and Val tries to shoot one (or both) of them. (He also tries to get Vox to leave Alastor for him when he finds them fighting and destroying empty buildings in a part of the pentagram, but it doesn't work because once they're done fighting Alastor is like "Well, that was fun!" And invites Vox to dinner after, lol. The fighting was the date activity for the day for the silly little radio man, and Vox is too confused to question it.)

(Also, ironically, Val being pissed at Alastor dating Vox just validates Alastor's beliefs - because it never occurs to him to Val is mad because keeping Vox hanging off of him made it easier for Val to get whatever he wants).

--

But, slowly, Vox is starting to realize that, despite Alastor INSISTING that he's not into him and is only dating him for the (nonexistent) clout - he does weirdly care in his own way, and somehow, he's a more romantic partner to him than Valentino ever was, even without seeming to even try to be or realizing it.

One time, Alastor notices that Vox not been to the hotel once in the past few days (since this whole thing has started, he's basically been showing up consistently), so he goes to break into Vee tower to see what's up.

"What's up" is Vox overworking himself and not sleeping for days and only consuming energy drinks as he hasn't left his little computer dungeon even once.

So. Alastor just. Kidnaps him. Refuses to listen as Vox is like, yelling that this project needs done, like, yesterday!

Alastor: Dear, are there not two others in your team who could do this?

Vox: Val is fucking useless at this shit, and Velvette doesn't care if it's late!

Alastor: Well, what's the point of them? You should let me eat them for this. Regardless, it's been at least 3 days of this for you, so if they wish for it to be on time, they can do it themselves.

And then Alastor just brings them back to his room and forces Vox to eat a real meal, before picking him up and dumping him on his bed.

(Vox, suddenly wide awake: What the fuck. What the FUCK. Since when were we having sex?!?!)

(They're not. Alastor changes his clothes to pajamas and threatens to eat one of his employees for every minute he's not sleeping for the next 8 hours.)

(Vox wonders what's wrong with him that he considers this to be romantic).

Either way, Vox passes out for at least 10 hours before waking up to 30+ missed calls, 50+ missed texts, and 100+ missed emails, all wondering where he disappeared to and why the project he was working on wasn't finished. Once again, Alastor offers to eat them. Vox refuses to find it charming. (He's lying, he does).

Especially since after this incident, Alastor will break into Vee tower now more often if he thinks Vox hasn't eaten or slept properly.

And then, one day, Vox just realizes that, despite Alastor saying to the contrary, they're definitely, like, dating for real. But Vox can't tell Alastor that, because any time he even implies this, he calls Vox an idiot because he's only dating him for publicity. (Never acknowledging that, like, anything he does for Vox that isn't in the public eye is very clearly not for that, lol)

[realjbguys]

marble hornets au about Jay coming back to life after being dead for like 5 years

that's been stuck in my head for days that's based kinda off a rp and its honestly isn't a great au, but it's brainrot as of rn so hear my yapping.

long writing ahead so beware

An au where Tim moved moved away after the marble hornets chaos. Brian is alive cause i said so. Tim and Brian moved in together. They were getting over it, getting better, healing their traumas.

BUT...... Jay Merrick.. the guy who Tim KNOWS died all those a few years ago is back. Tim, for a while, doesn't believe that the figure he sees randomly outside his windows or randomly on the edge of the treeline could be a dead guy. Hell, for a reasonable amount of time, he believes it's a hallucination until Brian agrees he also sees whoever it is. Neither of them knew who it was, until Brian goes out to finally figure out who the stalker 'really' is. Because they probably believed they were both having a shared hallucination.

Until Brian came back into the cabin one day with a Jay, looking like a sad wet cat. Bro looks like hes been through hell and back. Hair is greasy and a mess, clothes look old and worn, but most concerning?

While Tim and Brian were older than they looked 5 years after the incidents of marble hornets, Jay doesn't look any older than how he looked 5 years ago. He looks unchanged. If you choose to ignore the mess he looks like now, that is.

Tim isn't too happy about Jay being alive again. He has a bit of a grudge, but a part of him is glad he is alive and doing (not really at ALL) well. While Brian is trying to keep it positive.

After a while, the two agree that jay looks awful, even though they agreed way before the conversation began. Brian agrees to wash Jay off since he looks like a pathetic wet cat.

While brian was about to wash Jay off, cleaning him up, washing his hair, he noticed almost immidietly one thing was wrong, the bullet wound that killed him? The wound that should've at least scarred up after 5 years?

It's still there. Unhealed and disgusting in all its grossness. He tells Tim quickly and then patches up the wound on jay.

Tim and Brian get Jay to wear some of their old clothes that no longer fit either of them anymore. They were going to get rid of them, maybe donate them to Goodwill, but they can't do that now, since Jay needs new clean clothes, and since Tim doesnt have much enough money to buy the guy new clothes.

After a good week or two of Jay staying with the two, he wasn't acting quite right. Brian was the first to really notice. The way Jay barely ate much, how he rarley spoke, how he didn't have any much of that sparkle of life in his eyes anymore. Like he wasn't all fully there anymore. Brian brought it up to Tim, which was also a bit concerned for the younger guy.

AND THAT'S ALL I GOT FOR THIS AU. WROTE THIS AT 11AM SO IDK IF IT'S GREAT OR NOT.

let me know if i should add onto this!!!

i hope the au keeps yall up at night as well.

[impassociate]

So stay with me, stay with me.

Walk with me talk with me.

When three business execs all fall for the same janitor...

(Yes I know Vassago hasn't appeared in canon yet. No I'm not above retconning anything. Let me have my fun.)

[wyrdle]

Was musing a proper roleswap AU for Takuto and Shuji whilst on birdwatching today, and ah... Nihlistic/suicidal takuto who either lost Rumi or couldn't connect with her (and lost her), with kind and silly Shuji who'd give him apple juice cartons and bunny apples when he learns takuto likes them. (plotty things considered, we're dooming Takuto this time 😂)

My aus are so insane but so much fun yall need to get on my level

[sunrotdropbrain]

A little apocalyptic AU I've been working on

[hikkokoro]

Evil angst boi

Eyyy shadybug reference

[templegate]

An unfortunate connection

[reader-from-another-dimension]

Transformers One au where a transformers fan got truck-kuned into the TF One verse as Sentinel, luckily before he betrays the Thirteen Primes. Too bad he arrived right after the og Sentinel had accepted the deal with the Quintessons. Just some worm thoughts, might expand later idk tho

[gluttonous-kerfuffle]

In an extremely self indulgent move, @pineboots and I have created a litte AU where Gortash was actually raised by Blurg and Omeluum under the Society of Brilliance.

[hazardtoons]

target audience: me

[mew-ya]

what if they met ~15 years earlier

[moreworldliness]

the lonely sheriff

or uh. something like that. anyway AU where everything's normal but starlo's soul is a little ... different. sure that won't come back to kick his ass later