#idk these were all things that made me feel really nice i look back at them fondly
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
TRENCH COAT
Character: Remy 'Gambit' Lebeau x male reader
Plot: What happens in vegas stays in vegas.
Warnings: Smut, Top Remy, Bottom male reader, Mentions of riding, Mentions of rogue, hair pulling, vibrating hands (idk honestly, i think i saw it in a tweet once.) Dick size gets mentioned and there is alot of teasing, kinda actually has a plot. (I think that's it, I wrote his accent like mine is and how people around me sound, i tried to even add extra twang hopefully its good!!)
The bathroom door pushes open and Remy's snores come to a halt as the light shined across his face, He groans and rub his face. He leans up on his elbows and squints his eyes, His face quickly heats up when his eyes focus on the man in the doorway.
His eyes dart up and down at the clothes you were wearing-- You were only wearing two pieces of clothes but the sight of them was making everything on him go warm.
You were wearing those tight white boxers that Rogue had got you as a gag gift for valentines and a trenchcoat- his trenchcoat. It looked perfect on you, It fit you wonderfully, Not too big or too small.
His mouth dried up as his lips stretched into a grin, His eyes faltered for a second on the marks on your collarbones, "Somethin' 'bout you wearing my coat gives me a mighty big feelin' of possessiveness, cher." His eyes finally go back up to your face.
You shook your head and rubbed your eyes, You had just grabbed the first thing you saw to cover yourself to go piss.
When you got closer to the bed, Remy hooked his fingers into the pockets on the side of the coat and tugged you forward till your knees hit the mattress. "Lemme cuddle for a bit." He wanted you against him, He already felt cold even though he had two thick blankets covering him. He wanted your legs between his and your hands in his hair, He wanted you all over him.
When the blankets were lifted, You crawled under the covers. Your legs naturally found Remy's legs and you threw one of your legs around his waist, He was warm. You felt his hand slip under the trenchcoat and laid flatly against your side, His fingers lightly tracing up and down. It felt nice, He felt nice against you.
Remy buried his face into your hair, He kissed your head before leaning back and cupping your jaw to stare at you, "Good mornin'," He grinned, "I feel like I got hit by that motorcycle of yers, Did ya really ride me that hard last night?" He leans down and kisses your forehead.
You laughed and pushed his face away, "Don't be so vulgar."
He leaned into your hand and kissed your palm, "Ain't vulgar if it's true," He kept eye contact with you, He knew eye contact made you squirm. "Besides, Gambit's only askin' a question."
He smirked when he watched you turn your head away from him, His hand that was under the trench coat dragged his fingers down till they grazed the waistband of your boxers. His smirk grew when he felt your hips move up against his fingers. "You usually wear more clothes than just gambits coats an' those tightey whiteys you call boxers."
"They aren't that tight." You mumbled, You felt the flush crawl up your neck and your heart was beating fast and the teasing fingertips dipping in and out of your waistband didn't help.
"They are tight," He hooked the waistband with his index finger, "Don't see why you feel the need to wear 'em so small. You tryin' to show off?"
Remy slipped his index out of the waistband and instead traced your obvious bulge, He felt you twitch under his fingertips, "They're almost indecent." He swallowed, He just wanted to take them off you and make you feel so good. You looked so pretty laying beside him, He could feel your fingers tracing his collarbones and it just made a shiver go down his spine and his own cock pushed against his boxers. "Might as well not even be there."
You wrapped your hand around his wrist-- God, He wants that hand to be wrapped around something else. Fucking your hand would be enough as long as you look up at him with those pretty eyes and talk to him and he'd be set. He just needed you. It has never mattered what way, He'd have you any way you'd let him.
A groan left you and your hand tightened around his wrist, You wanted to jut your hips against his hand for any friction, But you knew as soon you did that he'd pull his hand away. He was a bastard. "It's just the brand Rogue got."
Remy scoffs, He stares down at you and you squeeze his wrist tighter, He laughs softly, "They basically are see-through," He takes his free hand and drags it down your chest, "Can see more comin' out of these than out of those damn shorts on yer suit. Don't take that as complainin' 'cause I ain't."
"You aren't supposed to look at me doing missions."
"And you're not supposed to be fightin' in something so damn small," He murmured, "Can see yer everything, There ain't much left to the imagination."
He moved his free hand down your chest and cupped you, "You expectin' me to ignore a view like that when I know I'm the only one who's allowed to see it?"
Your breath hitched and your grip loosened on his wrist, "and rogue."
He squeezed you, Just to hear the small gasps, "Don't know how the hell she resists you sometimes." He grumbled, He watched as a small wet spot formed on the front of your boxers. He rubbed your tip through the fabric and your hips jutted up against him. He smirked and stopped moving his thumb.
Your hips jutted upwards again, You groaned when he pulled his hand fully away, "She has this nice thing called restraint and control."
Remy chuckles, He moved so he was positioned in between your legs and leaned over you to kiss you on your collarbone and up your neck. "I don't have an ounce of restraint or control, 'specially when it comes to you two, cher."
You leaned your head back and hummed, Your eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of his lips against your skin, "You need to work on that."
He smiled against your skin, His hands grabbed at your sides, "It'd be a boring life if Gambit was on his best behaviour all the time."
A laugh escaped you when his stubble brushed against your jaw, "You drool when we stand close together and if we're in our suits, You melt."
The sound of your laugh made him grin, He closed his eyes and he just wanted to soak all of you in, He was smitten. "I'm only human, darlin', ain't got the same self-discipline as you." He kissed your jaw, He wanted to make you laugh again. "I oughta just start wearin' a bib."
"Besides," He murmured against your skin, His hand drifting back downwards, "I'm still holdin' up pretty well, All things considered."
Remy kissed every spot on your neck that he had missed last night, He grazed his teeth against your collarbone. He watched as you leaned your head back to give him more room.
"Are you?" Your voice was quiet and your eyes were closed, You were just focusing on him.
"You've currently got my hand in ya underwear," He squeezed against you and a gasp left you, The feeling shooting up your spine and your cock pushed more against his fingers. "My hard on pressin' against ya ass as we speak ... so, yes, I'd say I'm doing pretty well."
You grab onto his shoulders, Your fingers dig into the flesh and you spread your legs to wrap around his waist, You could feel him through his own underwear and it just made you want to whine. But you didn't want to fuel his ego, You physical had to swallow it down.
He grabbed onto your thigh, His fingers couldn't fully wrap around the flesh but just the sight of his slender fingers made you feel empty. "Vous allez me tuer, cher."
You felt yourself twitch, Fuck, You needed him and he obviously needed you.
You grab onto his hair and pull him to your face, "Get the lube," You whispered. "It's in my bedside table."
The response he gave you was a shaky breath as he leaned forward, which just made him push his dick more up against you. He grabbed your jaw and kissed you, It was sloppy. You could hear him fumbling in the drawer with his hand.
You tighten your hand in his hair, It was soft in between your fingers. You tugged the strands to make his head turn and give you more control in the messy kiss.
"Merde-" Remy groaned, He pulled back from the kiss and he was gasping for air. He glanced over to the bedside drawer and he wrapped his hand around the bottle. A shiver ran down his body and straight to his cock when he felt your lips against his jaw. He fumbled with the cap, But he just couldn't focus on opening the damn bottle. "Ya gonna have to let me sit up."
You kissed along his jaw line and whispered, "Just focus." You guided his head to turn the other way, You wanted to kiss every inch of him. You felt him shiver against you and gasp as you kept kissing his neck. Your fingers wrap around his jaw to keep his face still.
"Hard to do that when you keep doin' that." He grumbled, He's got the cap inbetween his teeth now and he's trying to pull it off.
"Condoms." You just remembered that those were needed, You blinked and leaned back and your hand trailed down from his jaw to his collar bone. You felt his throat move as he swallowed. "The large should be in the drawer."
Remy looked towards the drawer, The lube tube hanging from his mouth like a dog toy. You could see lube dripping down his chin from where his teeth pierced the plastic. He grabbed the condoms, Your hand still in his hair and you pulled him back towards you with it.
"Y'know," Remy pulled the lube from his mouth with one hand and the other hand had the whole box of condoms. "Gambit thinks ya got a kink for usin' ol' remy's hair as a damn leash."
"Works doesn't it?"
Remy lets the condoms box fall beside them, A few of them spilled out onto the sheets, "Can't argue with that," He gave your thigh a hard squeeze, "Just might have to return the favor, cher."
You raised a brow and brought your thumb to his chin and wipe off the lube that had dripped onto the skin, "You're just a mess," You mumble, "Is this shit even edible?"
His shoulders lifted then fell and his head dipped a inch to lick the lube off the tip and he tilted his head in mock thought, "It tastes like cherry," He nibbled on your thumb with a grin and he kept his red eyes on your own. "So it must be, no?"
You can't help the laugh that climbs out of your throat, Your lips stretched into a grin, "Give it here," You moved your hand away from his teeth, "Best make sure you won't fall over and die on me."
"I aint gonna die from some cheap lube," He huffed, But he tossed it onto your chest.
You flip the box, "Lucks on your side," You looked back at him, "Its a water based formula."
"Now," Remy smirked, "Let's get back to business, shall we, mon cher?" He placed his hands on each side of your head and leaned down to kiss you, He wanted to part your lips with his tongue, He wanted to taste you so fucking badly but he pulled back a few inches to whisper, "Top or bottom?"
You almost wanted to laugh, but you pursed your lips and answered, "You grabbed your condoms, So ill just bottom."
He immediately dipped his head and kissed your neck, He felt your adams apple move as you swallowed and he felt each breath you took, god, He could die doing this. "Just lemme-" He grabbed the lube and pulled his glove off with his teeth, He left his glove on once while jacking you off and it took forever to get the stains out. "just lemme finish preparin' and i'll give ya exactly what ya need."
He grabbed the underside of you knees and pulled them apart, "Merde," He swallowed as he stared at you with hunger in his pretty eyes, He added a ton of lube on two of his fingers and he dipped his hand in between your thighs. "So pretty." He whispered as he slipped a finger in, He watched as you turned your head away and covered your mouth with the palm of your hand.
Remy tsked, "Cher, We're going to have a word about all that noise that ain't being made." He leaned forward and snatched your hand away before curling his finger inside of you, His fingertip searching for that bundle of nerves.
"Fuck--"
"There it is!" He laughed, He nipped at the inside of your thigh, "Ya get too quiet sometimes."
"You talk too much," You grumble and your hips dug down and took more of his slender finger inside, "and don't do alot."
"You- We both know," He slid another finger in, "that's a damn lie."
He kissed on your thigh, "Don't go forgetting who makes sure ya don't walk normal for days after our little meetups, cher."
"Bit cocky," You gasped as you closed your eyes and you began to fuck yourself on the two fingers.
Remy's fingers move and he pushes against that bundle and then stops just to push everywhere around that spot, "When i'm right, I'm right." He grazed your thigh with his teeth, "You'll be the one walking funny, not gambit."
Your back lifted off the sheets as he taunted you with not pushing that bundle of nerves again, Your hips moved downwards trying to make him brush against it, Your dick was aching and you knew it was weeping precum at this point, You felt it dripping down the side.
Remy pulled out and wiped his fingers on the sheets as he grabbed one of the condoms with his other hand, "Taking that as a compliment," He grinned and he ran a hand through his hair and out of his face, "Though," He pulled the wrapper off, "your about to be able to tell how hot you are and how damn good remy is in--" He slipped the condom on and smirked as he looked down at you, "in thirty seconds or so."
He leaned forward and grabbed a pillow, "Iift up f'me," He shoved the pillow under your hips when you lifted them.
You wrapped your leg around his hip and the other found its place on his shoulder, His hands found their place on your knees again, He swallowed and looked up at the ceiling, "Careful," He looked back down, "Might just take this as you wanting it rough, mon cher."
He slowly pushed his hips forward and he felt you swallowing him whole and with a groan and after one pause he was fully in, His head dipped down and he murmured something in french that your ears couldn't catch.
Your hands climbed their way up his neck and back into his hair as your back lifted up and your mouth opened with a groan.
"Ya hellbent on destroying those perfectly styled tresses of mine, aint ya, cher?" He slipped out a few inches before pushing back in, His eyes rolled back in his head at the warm feeling of you around him.
Your hands pull his face down towards your own as your teeth dug into your bottom lip, He shook his head as he looked down at you, "No, no," He poked your cheek with his thumb, "youre gonna keep makin' those damn sweet sounds--"
Your lips met his and he gasped when your teeth sunk into his bottom lip, His hips jutted forward at the sting. You pulled back and he blinked, "oh." He leaned back down to get your lips against his again.
"faster," You murmur as your hand pushed at the back of his head to push him closer to you, You felt him twitch inside of you as he moved a hand down to your thigh, That gave you a wonderful idea. The leg around remy's hip pushed against the small of the red haired's back to push him deeper inside of you.
"Merde--" Remy whines, His lips brush against your chin as his head ducked down to stare at the place you two connect at. He moved his hips in a familiar pace, His hand tightened around your thigh as he tried to ground himself. You were just so warm and good and that fucking mouth of yours, jesus, you were going to kill him. "If ya aint good."
You kissed his forehead and his head shot up which gave you the perfect angle to kiss his jaw, which you gladly did. You placed sloppy kisses all over the flesh.
"Darlin'" His hips move quicker and his voice gets more whiny.
"hm?" Your kisses stop as you get closer to his ear. His dick drug pass that spot and your eyes fluttered as you moaned, Your fingers nails dug into scalp as you started to move your hips to met his and his head dipped down to bury itself against your neck, He kissed your skin, which made your turn your head to give him more room.
Your leg around his waist pushed against his back again which this time made him lurch forward and his stomach brushed against your abandoned cock, That made the feeling in your stomach get worse and your cock weeped even more. You opened your mouth to ask remy to touch you but all that came out was more moans.
"I aint gonna last another goddamn minute if you keep this up," His thrust grows faster and then it stops immediately. A whine escapes your throat as remy gasps for breath above you, "I gotta change the damn position, cher."
He kissed your neck and leaned back up, He looked down at you, He moved his thumb to hook inside of your mouth, "Don't worry," He murmured as he moved his thumb around your mouth covering it in spit, "You won't be empty for too long."
Your brows furrowed for a second but before you could even process a question he pulled out and rolled over so he was laying down beside you, His thumb slipped out of your mouth, now both your holes were empty, how annoying.
Remy pats his thigh, "Come on, darlin'," He beckoned you with a curl of his index finger, "Ride me."
"Not even a please?" You whispered. Not that he needed to beg, you would gladly ride him all night long if he so wished.
"Ya know damn well the please is heavily implied." He grumbled, He moved his hands to his side as you climbed onto him. His hands went back to your hips.
"You gonna be good f'me, mon cher?" He leaned back onto the pillows and up at you.
"I feel like that question might be more for you then me," You grabbed his cock in your hand and slipped it back in, It was such a wonderful feeling and your head fell back as you sighed and your eyes closed as you soaked up the feeling of remy becoming one with you.
"Ha, You're real funny," His nails dug into your skin, "How's the view? You enjoying it?"
You tilted your head as you stared down at him, He did look beautiful, his red hair was spewed across the pillowcase and his cheeks were a dusted pink, You could see the marks you left on his chest and neck the night before. You moved your hand to lay flat against his chest and you felt each breath he took as his chest lifted and fell, god, he was so pretty. You could just bite him.
You began moving up and down, His body arched and his neck was bared to you, Something overcame you and your fingers wrapped around his throat as you went faster.
"You really are going to kill me, cher," He whined, His hips began moving up to met you in the middle. It had you groaning and squeezing tighter around his neck.
The sound of flesh hitting each other bounced off the walls and the room was filled with the sounds of both of you groaning and moaning each other's praises.
"A damn kiss would be good f'me right now," Remy moaned, His hips went faster to met your slower movements that made your head swim. "Come on, be a good boy and kiss ya man."
You nodded, he felt so deep inside you, so fucking good. You leaned down to give him a quick peck.
His hips started to go faster, Which made you moan and your back arched, your fingers dug into his shoulders. Your eyelids closed and your mouth opened to let out all the noises that climbed up your throat.
"Mmmmf-" Remy groaned, He pulls you down faster on his cock, you felt so good and warm and there was that squeeze you did ever few seconds that just made him--
You felt the condom swell inside of you and your brows furrowed and you gasped for air, "Did you just...?" you questioned him as his hips slowed down.
His head fell back against the pillows with a groan, "Yeah," He closed his eyes as he took deep breaths and you watched his chest go up and down quite quickly, "I have a damn good excuse, cher."
"Yeah?" Your own cock was still abandoned and weeping as it brushed against the abs in front of you and each brush made your hips lift, You wanted to paint remy's skin in you.
"Shaddup," He swatted your side, "I swear im not this quick, usually."
You nodded and leaned down to place your hands by his head as you started to lift your hips again to chase your own release.
"Oh--" He whined. He stares up at you, his eyes scan every inch of you and he couldn't help but admire you. The small shine that decorated your skin from the lamp on the bedside, Every thing about your body was perfect to him and he wanted to kiss all of it.
"Keep going?"
"Hell yeah," He nodded, "I aint nowhere done with ya, cher." He moves his hand down to grab your weeping cock, His thumb rubbed against the tip. You immediately reacted and thrusted up into his hand you moaned, The feeling of finally being touched was amazing. Your head was feeling light and that knot in your stomach tightened as you fucked his hand.
"Ya just love gambit's hand on ya," His hand squeezed the base of your cock and he slowed down his hips to match the pace of his hand.
You were being drowned in pleasure, You couldn't decide if you wanted to fuck yourself on his dick or fuck his hand, Both felt so good, everything felt so fucking good. You whined and thrusted in his hand, your tip brushed against his stomach and fucking hell--
Your back arched as you grabbed onto his shoulders, He was so deep inside of you and his hand was warm and squeezed you every few seconds, sweet jesus, this man was amazing.
"Not so gentle tonight," He smirked up at you, "are we, mon cher?" His breath hitched at the nails digging into his skin, it was definitely going to leave crescent shapes.
You blinked as his words met your ears and you leaned down to kiss on his collarbones for a silent apology.
"You're not sorry," He laughed, His hand tightened and slowly dragged themselves from the base to the tip.
You kissed the crescent shapes and looked up at him with eyes that you knew made him melt inside and his knees into noodles. Your mind swam at the feeling of his hand, You tried to focus but all you wanted to do was fuck his hand.
"Ya gonna apologize to every mark you'd made," He questioned, His free hand drug its nails against your scalp and through the strands. He watched as you nodded.
"Damn good manners," He looked down and watched you fuck his hand and the way your mouth opened, He wouldn't be surprised if you started drooling. The idea of you doing something that pathetic made him flush, He would have to see if that would be something you'd find hot. "Gambit likes those manners."
You head tilted to the side and laid against his chest, You moaned as your hips kept fucking his hand. Your head was swimming and you only had one thought, like a dog in heat. All you could do was fuck and whimper.
"Ya close, darlin'?" He loosened his hand on your cock, "I know that whimper ya get every time ya get close."
Your hips faltered but he picked up your slack, Your eyes rolled back into your head. "Shit." You whined.
"Ah-ah," He chided, "language."
Your head struggled to process the words because if you did process them you wouldve made a comment about how he uses that language as well, But you couldn't process shit as his hips started to move again with the same fast pace as his hand. Your legs were starting to burn as you moved up and down, you were slowing down now.
You whined when you felt his hands start to vibrate, It was a weird sensation and something that you didn't even know he could do. You looked down to see his hands growing that familiar pink hue that comes from his powers, "When did you learn you could do that?" The vibrations were rushing up your spine and it made you want to release even more, You were getting closer to the edge now and his thumb-- vibrating thumb at that was pushing against your tip and smearing your precum all over your cock, "Ah- fuck- remy-"
"Ya say that like i wasn't doing all sorts of fun with my powers since the beginning." Remy laughs, He drags his thumb down from the tip and down the underside of your cock all the way to your balls, which he cupped in his palm. He tilts his head and watches every little emotion that crosses your face, His eyes dart all over your body watching every reaction that your body makes, like you were his own personal experiment.
Your head fell back and your hips dug down, All your thoughts were mush, You couldn't even think properly right now, All you think about was his cock and his hands and those beautiful eyes of his that seemed to be glued to you.
"Ya like that, don't ya?" His hand moved to wrap itself back around your length and it moved down to the base and sat there, "Ya getting close, cher?"
You nodded, The knot in your stomach was getting tighter and you wanted to unloosen it, You leaned down and buried your face in his shoulders and your mouth opened to bury your teeth in his flesh.
"Gonna make a mess on gambit's chest?" He groaned at the feeling and his hips were starting to falter again.
Your let go of his flesh and turned your head to be buried in his neck instead, "sweet jesus." you whined.
"That a prayer, cher?" He moved his other hand to grasp your balls, "Gonna keep moaning f'me like a pretty little thing?" His hand started to vibrate around your balls as your eyes rolled back into your head, "Make me feel like the lucky one here, cher."
Your teeth sunk back into him as you finally came, The feeling made your head feel fuzzy and your body relaxed into his, God, that felt good.
"ah-ah," He chided, "Watch those damn fangs." His hand grabbed onto your locks and pulled you back, He glanced down at his shoulder and he was sure he could count all your teeth in the mark, "Damn, cher, gonna have a mark for a week."
"Sorry," You swallowed, Your eyes blinked slowly as you stared at him. You felt so good, right now.
"Better be," He smiled at you, He released your hair and patted your cheek, "damn sharp teeth ya got there."
You lifted your hips a little to slip him out and flopped onto the pillows beside him.
"Tired, darlin'?" He leaned up and grabbed a handful of tissues off the bedside, he leaned back on his thighs and began wiping your stomach clean before doing himself.
"What are we gonna tell charles and erik?" The fact that you two weren't supposed to be together this night came rushing back to your mind ruining every good feeling you just had.
"Nothin'?" Remy laughed awkwardly, "We're grown ass adults-" He pulled the condom off his cock and cleaned himself off fully, "They don't need to know."
"I know that," You grumble, You watched every move he made.
"Ya think they're suspicious we're bangin'?" He teased, He tossed the used condom and tissue into the bin beside the bed. He laid down on the pillow beside you.
"Erik will probably think you're corrupting me," You teased.
"Erik has called me worse, cher," He grabbed his cigarette off the bedside and fumbled with the lighter, He took a deep breath once he finally got it lit.
You stared at his lips that were wrapped around the end of the cig, "What time is the flight tomorrow?"
"bout noon," He held the cigarette out for you to take a drag. You shook your head, you didn't want to smoke right now. He brought it back to his lips, "Ya gonna stay up all night?"
"no."
His free hand ran its way through your hair, "Gambit isn't gonna let ya sit here and worry all night about the professor and that metalhead."
You laughed, "Metal head."
"They'll say their piece, We'll tell em a lie, then we'll go back to bangin'" He blew some smoke up towards your face, Which in response you lightly shoved his face away. "Rude."
"Goodnight, remy," You patted his chest before rolling over onto your side and closing your eyes, You tried to ignore as your boss -- erik -- face flicked into your head.
"Night, cher."
Now it was just a waiting game, It was time to see who would leave first. It always happened the same way: one of you would wake up first and leave without waking the other. The one who left would always make sure to leave a stack of cash on the bedside to cover all expenses.
It was just a question on who would it be this time?
#sub male reader#uke male reader#bottom male reader#bttm male reader#x bottom male reader#remy lebeau#gambit#gambit x male reader#remy lebeau x male reader#gambit xmen#x men comics#x men 97#x men
93 notes
·
View notes
Note
helloooo!! can i request idw rung x human fem reader?? just fluff, maybe rung is exhausted from all the sessions and clients, and the reader is just there for him. Kinda like instead of rung giving out therapy, he's receiving therapy lolll
And this makes rung kinda emotional because like i said, he's always the one giving out therapy, and no one ever really cared about him that way
idk if u write for idw though i hope u do😭 have a nice day!
-🍓 anon
Thank you for requesting this, I wanna smother him in love so badly.
No warnings!
-
-
-
Rung loves to help, the care he feels deeply for all on the ship is immeasurable, like a sire to their sparklings. He just wants to give them the tools to help themselves, to help them out of their depressions, to help manage their moods swings and out bursts.
To show them they aren't alone, and it's okay.
But some days take everything out of him, like learning something new in his clients past that just makes his spark break for them. Rung forgets himself, forgets that he too needs someone to lean on sometimes.
He didn't expect that support to come in the form of the human of the ship.
You knew he'd be back late and yet you still found your way to his habsuite, and stayed up waiting for him. You smile up at him, gentle and kind.
"Welcome back, you look tired, hon. C'mon, you need to lay down and relax."
He's not sure what made him break, your soft voice or your warm expression, but he could feel the fluid leaking down his face plate, fogging his goggles. He moved to you without a second thought, carefully picking you up and holding you close to his face plate as he lays down on his berth.
"I just want to help them."
His quaking voice breaks your heart.
"I know, Rung, I know. You have been doing so well. But you forget to take care of yourself, you can't help everyone if you're too tired." You try to wipe his tears, but there is just too much.
You nuzzle up close to him, offering some comfort to the large bot.
"You need someone to vent to, you need to take those stupidly long hot showers, read something new, you need time for yourself to recover."
When was the last time someone offered such support to him? Been there to let him cry and get it all out?
"You're a kind bot with so much love to give, but recovery isn't all work, you need to stop and just breathe in the moment, feel what you feel, and show it."
He lets out a watery chuckle.
"I know you're right, but I'm not pleased about it."
You playfully huff, "Well, now you just sound like Prowl being proven wrong."
Rung moves to lay on his side, curling around you in the process, keeping you close to him. He takes his fogged goggles off, setting them to the side, letting you see his pretty blue optics, but he looks so tired.
You place a hand on his cheek, rubbing soothing circles across his metal.
"You're a sweet bot, Rung, don't let these trying times ruin your compassion."
You nearly panic at how much he begins to sob, as if you broke the dam that had been cracking for so long, his cries were loud in your ears, but you never wavered in your comfort. You lay against him, kissing the digit of the servo that holds you.
he needs this, he's needed this for so long.
"It's okay, I'll stay by your side, always."
There isn't anything he wouldn't do for the crew, and there isn't a thing you wouldn't do for him. You let him cry as much as he needed until he grew exhausted, growing limp in the oncoming rest cycle.
He spoke up, his voice near a whisper.
"You'll stay here with me...right?"
You worm your way out of his servo and lay down next to his helm, his optics lazily following your every move.
"I'll be here when you wake up, you won't get rid of me that easily."
His smile, though tired, is just as sweet as always.
"Thank you."
"Anything for you."
You watch as his optics slide close, powering down to recharge. You will stay right here with him, right beside him no matter what, he's too kind to be left alone as is.
His berth isn't very comfortable for you, but you will ask for your bed to be moved here if he'd be okay with that.
Ah, you will worry about that in the morning, for now you just want to bask in his presence and enjoy this.
#transformers x reader#transformers#transformers rung#transformers rung x reader#transformers idw#i wonder what my therapist would think if she knew i was using what she said in a fanfic about a robot-#tranformers idw x reader#transformers mtmte#transformers mtmte x reader#transformers lost light
41 notes
·
View notes
Text
Giving back the bird's wings...
feat. Levi Ackerman
After some observing Levi confrontes you about your relationship with your boyfriend. He can't longer look and ignore the feeling that tugged at his heartstrangs. You deserve so much better...
In this story you are working for the survey corps as maid in the headquarters. And you have a really toxic relationship with your boyfriend. Idk why but writing for Levi always makes me want to write something angsty. So here we are ☠️✨ please be aware that some things can trigger. So take a look at the warnings.💖 Oh and I suck in proof reading ☠️
Wordcount:4k
Warnings: Angst, ab*sive relationship, tox*c relationship, mentions of domest*c v*olence, sad, but fluff especially in the end. Levi is really tender with you 💖
You sat there in his office, tears streaking your beautiful face. It hurt him, more than it hurt you.
He found out what happened, not that it was that hard at all, people just needed to take a closer look, a more concerned look behind that happy exterior you always put on.
It was convincing, nearly so convincing that Levi himself might not notice, not right away.
But he cursed himself for not seeing it sooner.
You were a sweet girl, you have always been. So giving and selfless. You weren't in the corps, no. But you worked for them as a maid.
You cleaned and made the beds for the scouts. You cooked and served, and of course always had an ear for everyone who needed it. Not only that, but you were part of the group who made the scout feel like family. Especially the trainees, the new ones.
Levi was always gruff, pretending he would find you annoying.
Although it was indeed the opposite. He knew you was a person that probably would give someone else your last money because they needed it more than you. Too good for this cruel world, too good for him.
Not that he ever had a chance, he always thought to himself. You were taken, not a single lady. Your boyfriend was part of the military policy. A tall guy, strong and really an eye-catcher. But well even when he always seemed so concerned for you, or so nice. He wasn't.
Levis steel blue eyes looked at you, how you hid your face behind your hair. That pain on your face, it tugged in his heart strings.
Why you were sitting here?
Well, after Levi slowly found out what kind of man your boyfriend was, he simply observed you. Some signs were clear, he wasn't dumb. He saw how you hid your bruises, how you cried alone, ate alone. Always trying to avoid when someone asked you...really asked you how you have been.
But tonight he had enough of observing and lurking around you. He was sure, your tears you shed give it all away.
A barrier that broke after he pointed it out.
"It's not like you think, he can be gentle, I swear. Sometimes he just doesn't know how he should control his strength." your voice was thin, even now you was defending this piece of shit? This man, who claimed to love you? And yet hurt you so much.
"Stop defending him. He hurts you, you don't hurt people that way when you love them." his voice was cold, he was angry. Not at you, of course not. His hand went through his raven strands. "You are too good for him, you give him everything and he did what? Throwing it away? And you still think it's your fault?" There was a chuckle that ran down your spine, he was not amused far from it.
"Some people need-" you wanted to start why you saw something good, you always saw something good, even in the captain himself.
"It still makes my blood run cold, to remember what he did before. You never told me anything at all, or anyone. I don't watch, (Y/N)." he stated firm, and he was really concerned, for you. Too soft, to get hurt by someone like this, a bird in a cage which wings were cut off.
He stood up from his seat makes his way around the desk before he stopped in front of you. Your head hanging low.
"It's not like I would be oblivious, i-I know what he does." You meant, your voice trembling. When you were small you always wanted a man like you had now, big and strong, popular among the ranks, a smile that makes your heart warm, until you discovered his smile, your boyfriend heart was not real. His smile never reached his eyes. It made you believe that simply you was too different for this world. You were the problem, in being too sensitive, too emotional. Caring too much for everything. You were a smart girl, but you lost your own worth for yourself.
Thinking it was all you ever could get.
"When you know, why then you are still there?" he asked in a deep voice, still standing in front of you, looking down at you. He wanted to get a reaction from you, wanted you to see how damn wrong this was.
"Where else should I go? What do you want me to say?" you asked him, your voice filled with sorrow and yet with anxiety.
"I want you to speak it out." Levi meant, and in his head he was killing this man about the 100th time.
"Speak out what? That hitting your girlfriend is wrong? That insulting her is wrong? Making her do things, she never wanted but never had a choice? This is the world we were born in, everyone has problems. Mine is not different. It is what it is, not that I deserve anything at all when I am taking everything too my heart, I try... I fucking try. And it is me who-" you said, and your voice went a little louder in the end, you wanted to lash out not knowing why, tears started to run down your cheeks again. He stopped you, grabbing your chin and lifted it so you were forced to look at him.
"You are not aware how this makes my blood thin, to remember what you are to him." Levi himself talking a little louder because of the intensity of this situation. He would never allow anyone to touch you like that again. He would rather die than have the hands of this filthy man on you.
Alone the thought how much you suffered at these hands, not just physical.
But the Captain was right, what were you to your boyfriend? A question you asked yourself a lot, wanted to be better, wanted to improve, although you were already perfect in other eyes...in Levis eyes.
"What am I?" you asked, and you looked so vurnable to him, he wanted to shield you from anything cruel this world offered you.
"You are...precious." these words simply came out of his mouth before he could stop them. Not that they were not true, but maybe because they were too true, to himself.
"(Y/N) you are lovely, probably one of the most...purest people I know. You take care of everyone and everything around you, simply because this is the being you are. You make a place feel like home, because you are home." his voice lower this time laced with raw honesty, not that he sounded pretty about that, it was everything he usually would never say out loud. He then went to one of his knees and hold your hand. Your teary eyes widen, no one ever said anything like that to you. No one appreciated your personality like this.
"At least to me..." he than added thin. You took a shaky breath, tried to wipe your tears away. But his hand already was on your cheeks, his thumb collecting the salty fluid.
"Why are you saying this?" you asked him, it was irony still asking questions if this was true, how bad this man had damaged you?
"Because otherwise you wouldn't see it, not that you would see this now, he damaged you, broke your wings." Levi stated and there was this glint in his eye, a silent promise to himself.
"He broke more than that, he never had a nice word what he really meant." you spoke and at least you now was lured out of your shell, telling him what you really felt. Levi meant every word he said to you. And he was not known to say things like that. You were that sweet expectation, he needed to let you know what you were to him...you were home.
"Levi..." your thin voice spoke his name with such a need, because you felt so lost.
"I give them back to you, I promise." he said it just made you cry more. You felt like you wanted to crawl inside you, away from this situation. Levi would give you back your wings, that were cut of so rudely.
"Shhh." he soothed you then before you was pulled into a warm hug. You were sobbing, like crying out every bit of pain your boyfriend gave you.
After that conversation, Levi would never allow you to go back to that bastard, not with the knowledge he had.
You stayed in the headquarters. Levi stayed the whole time by your side, until you fell asleep, you were just so exhausted from all the crying and the distress. After he was sure you slept safe and sound he made his way out.
"Where you're going to this time?" a known voice was heard behind him, Levi turned around it was the Commander Erwin.
"Taking care of things." he replied, and it was with a cold tone, hard like steel. Erwin for sure wasn't clearly in the picture what had happened, but he knew Levi wouldn't react like this when it wouldn't be necessary.
"What things?" Erwin asked sternly.
"Removing some trash around here." Levi answered, not giving away at all what his dark plans were.
"Whatever you need to do, make sure it disappears thoroughly." the Commander said before he let Levi go his way. He knew he was going to kill someone, and that someone would be your heartless boyfriend....
Levi knew you would cry, he knew you would break. But you were broken long ago from a person who never even deserved all the love you could give.
His stepped were determined, with that one purpose. Someone who was just so fragile as you and yet so strong trying to hold your head above water, it hurt him.
You were drowning all by yourself, and this bastard of a man pushed your head underwater, filling your lungs so you couldn't scream.
It was unfair to him, like so many things. So many things weren't right, but this, this was not just something. You were good, lovely even, and Levi knew when it was time to let things rest, but this? How should he rest when he knows the bitter truth that someone was making your life harder. Making your life...not worthy.
When Levi reached his place he wanted to be he took a deep breath before he knocked on that door.
Someone opened it, indeed your boyfriend with that bright smile, that smile that teared you apart.
"The Captain of the Survey Corps, how can I help?" he asked him not aware how the next hour would go for him. Besides the fact that he didn't even ask for you. Your work was done about 3 hours ago, and you didn't come home. Levi knew that because he was the one who stopped you from going home.
"Hm, just checking up on things. Your girlfriend works for us, just doing some check-ups." Levi said gruffly in a low voice, his eyes looked hard, although they always did. He was short yes but not less an authority, he stepped into your home, the home you shared with this man.
"Oh yeah of course, we do these check-ups too, in our ranks." your boyfriend replied with curt smile letting Levi in.
"Where is she?" the Captain asked quiet stern, as he walked through the living room his hand resting on the sofa you probably used to sit.
"(Y/N)? Running some errands by now, she is always up on her legs. Like the good maid she is." he chuckled and well indeed he had this charm, seeming so nice and polite. All an act just to make people think he would be worth something. The short man sighted running a hand through his hair before his steps stopped. Turning around to the man.
"Errands? To this time? Isn't it a little late for that?" he cocked his head to the side, like if he was testing him. Your boyfriend was lying into his face, like he lied to everyone. It made Levis heart heavy to know that you belonged to this piece of shit. Someone who not even cherished you, who wouldn't give anything to you. Not more than a hit to you, not more than just empty words.
How often had you cried, because of him? How often your pretty eyes turned red? How often did you hid in your bedroom, hoping the next fight would be over. It was nearly like Levi could see all those things happen when he was inside this place.
"Well, yes it is late. But you know her, right? She wants to get things done." the other man meant not giving away anything. Levi groaned before the door was closed from the outside.
"Yeah she wants that, she always does a good job." Levi meant and walked closer to the tall guy who claimed to love you.
"It's not safe at all for a woman like her to wander around alone to this time, don't you think?" his voice cold, not a hint of warmth. God Levi would give everything, everything to protect you. Slowly your boyfriend turned irritated by these questions, the behavior. He furrowed his eyebrows tried to wave this off.
"Women like her?" he asked Levi with a certain edge in his voice.
"Women like her....soft, and good, make you warm around your heart with a single smile. Make your day better by walking by. The way she pours in tea...with such a determination to make someone happy nearly can be annoying when it wouldn't be so beautiful." Levi mumbled more to himself, when he realized how much you meant to him. How much you affected him.
"You don't deserve her, and you know it don't you?" Levi asked him the direct looking nearly menacing in his face.
"What you are talking about? Sure you are still doing check-ups?" your boyfriend asks and slowly there was this other side getting out, his face turning stern and angry.
"Yeah, check-ups on you. You really thought you hid it well enough?" Levi started and well Levi was shorter yes, but this guy wouldn't stand a chance against him.
"It is not of your concern what is between me and my damn girlfriend." he stated with a low and dangerous voice, all that bubbly and happy side he appeared vanished in this second, it was clear it was never real.
"She is my concern, she was when she started working by us. She hides her bruises well enough, you don't hit her face, I give you that." Levis words meant to provoke, to justify his actions he would take. And Indeed your boyfriend never hit your face, it was always so pretty, and he didn't want to ruin it, but he didn't want anyone to notice what was happening behind closed curtains.
"And? What now? Reporting me to the higher ups? Congratulations Captain, no one cares about a fucking maid." your boyfriend claimed with a cruel chuckle, cracking his knuckles.
"It's already too late for that, when you really think this here has a happy ending for you, than you have not paid enough attention boy." Levi grumbled and then it started...
That "fight" was short, indeed short, your boyfriend was so fast on the ground with Levis form hanging over him, bashed against the wall. Not more than a howling hound now.
"Please, I never do it again!" that tall guy cried, after he got hit many times in the face. His wrists already broken because of Levi.
"I swear! Stop, please." he begged, begged for his life, never did he thought something like that would happen. That someone would come and actually give him a lesson, but more than that to actually punish him for what he did.
"You didn't stop, when she asked you to." Levi spit out into his face, maybe it was wrong, maybe this was the wrong approach to do it. But man like him would never change, they would find the next victim. You already suffered enough... maybe it would hurt, but this pain, Levi knew he would be able to heal it for you. At least this is what he wanted to try.
With some more action of Levis fists your boyfriend slumped to the ground, alive but barely breathing. He asked himself why someone like Levi came to do justice for you.
"You want her to yourself." he stated with a weak and raspy voice.
"It's not about what I want, but what needs to be done. She suffered in your hands, and this what I gave you was not even the half of everything she went through. How could you hurt her?" Levi asked him grabbing his throat looking him dead in the eyes.
"Because she let me... because she is that pretty bird I wanted to keep in that cage." he answered and maybe your boyfriend was now honest for the first time in his life.
"She is good and you knew that. A shame that a man like you had her, had the chance to love a precious being like her and yet ended up locking her up, cutting off her wings, for what use? Because you felt strong? What a pity you need to be, when you need to hurt others to feel strong? Piece of shit." Levis voice was dangerous sharp like a dagger he meant every word, he was so angry at this guy.
"And now do me a favor and fucking die." was the last Levi said to him before he snapped his neck.... it was done now, he removed the trash.
Weeks went on after this incident, your boyfriend...he was being missed, his body not found, simply no one expected him to be dead, but he vanished.
You were aware what had happened, even when Levi never told you exactly that he committed murder. It was not like that tit was selfish, but he couldn't watch, couldn't watch how you would always be haunted by the actions of this man. And well...you truly let your happy guard down, behind that a sad girl, a broken one. So much weight on your delicate shoulders, a weight he wanted to lift. Levi would carry every burden, even when you never wanted him to.
He gave you time, not even expecting you to love him, to show him a sign of something, a small glimpse. Everything he wanted was that you felt safe, felt cherished.
Levi was in his office again but when he looked outside the window for just a fleeting moment, his eyes caught your sight.
You stood there in your maid dress you always wore, you finished working. Standing outside and handing out some pastries you bake. Of course Sasha was literally eating out your hand before Connie and Jean could get some. You weren't healed, but you seemed lighter, there was something about you now...something that made him want to believe it was justified what he did. He would give everything to a new sight to drink you in. The woman that was so gentle, yet always ready to give everything she could, just for a smile from another. The Captain found solace in watching you, your features highlighted by the sun. These lips that curled into a warm chuckle. These eyes that always gave away how you felt. At least to those who took a look, a real look.
He would give everything to borrow your indifference to see the world through your eyes.
You two had something together, the world had been unfair to both of you and yet you were able to be like this. Able to give that what Levi couldn't show. Not that these feelings weren't there, he cared a lot, more than he would admit, but you were the part that showed it.
You would complete him.
After you gave the three scouts the pastries you then went inside again, not many moments went over and he heard a knock. "Come on in." he replied with a curt voice. And there you was, none of you talked about the fact he made your boyfriend disappear.
You opened the door, with a tray in your hands, a warm cup of tea, Earl Grey, no sugar with a shot milk. And one of the pastries you bake, glazed with honey and walnuts.
"Before my shift is over I don't wanted you to pass out the chance to get one of those, before Sasha and Connie will kill all the pastries." you spoke with a sweet voice. You still seemed to carry a burden, yet you seemed lighter. You placed the tray on his desk, stood there next to him for a moment. Furthermore, you were thinking. There was this tension, the question if you should ask or not since weeks. The tension wasn't bad at all, but it was palpable. So much Levi felt it too.
"Your shift is already over, I know when it ends, and you worked longer than you have should." Levi pointed out with a short nod to the clock.
Indeed, your shift would have ended about 45 minutes ago. You wiped your hands on your apron before your face turned to him.
"Yeah maybe it was, but I enjoy being here. It's home now, remember?" you answered and was referring to the fact that he told you, you were home. And it struck his heart for a moment when you said that. You weren't shocked about what he had done? You were sweet and gentle yes, but not oblivious. Likewise, you knew your situation had been bad, probably when Levi wouldn't have noticed, when he wouldn't care you would still be locked away like the bird without wings you were.
Yearning for freedom. You were still learning, learning to fly, learning to take your freedom Levi gave you. You were living in the headquarters now, not that old home that hold so many gruesome memories to you.
He gave back your wings, the feathers slowly grow back, with each passing day.
"(Y/N)... I-" for once Levi wanted to start, wanted to explain why he did it. But you shut him up, with a simple gesture. Shoving the tray closer to him.
"You gave me back, what I wasn't able to get myself. Maybe it was not the perfect way. But...what is even perfect?" you asked instead you looked him deep in the eyes.
A silent understanding. It was a moment that not seemed to went over.
"You are." Levi replied, when he said that your eyes went so soft. It has always been like this, he never expected anything in return for what he did. He yearned for you, for so long, for that understanding and lovely woman you were. The way you made him warm around his heart.
Always feeling so unlucky when you had been taken, by a man who never truly wanted to see you. Because Levi saw everything about you. Every aspect that made you...you.
He lived like he got missing limbs, for you. So often he felt a piece missing. A missing heart next to his.
"Don't say that, Captain." you meant to him before you bend down a little because he was sitting, and you had been standing next to him.
"You said I am home... I want you to say that I feel like you are home too." you spoke before you took a deep breath, leaning in and giving him a sweet kiss on his cheek.
The usual stoic Captain, so composed. He felt vurnable for a short moment. Someone who saw behind his exterior, even with the things he has done, and would do again.
"Thank you, Levi. For everything." you whispered wanted to turn awa
#fanfiction#fanfic#anime#new blog#anime and manga#anime x reader#anime fluff#anime imagines#anime angst#angst#angst with a happy ending#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackerman#levi aot#aot#aot x reader#attack on titan x reader#attack on titan#captain levi#levi ackerman angst#levi x reader#levi x you#levi ackerman x you#sad anime#aot fanfiction#aot fluff#attack on titan angst#attack on titan anime#image#captain levi x reader
37 notes
·
View notes
Note
casey also talks about sepang 2015 what do you think of that
oh in that podcast? uh... lemme listen again...
yeah idk it's not really anything new I'd say? he's said basically all the same stuff in more interesting and extensive ways elsewhere. I think casey inevitably has a very 'well feuding is bad and helps nobody' point of view, has expressed that before in the past, does it here again, and he's also drawn a parallel between himself and marc on several occasions. which... well, of course there's similarities in terms of public discourse or whatever, but the parallel really falls apart whenever casey argues the feuds cost valentino. like, I do think it's sometimes important to just. keep in mind. it's interesting that casey draws this comparison in his mind but that doesn't necessarily means he's right about this. I'm not sure how you'd argue that starting a feud with casey cost valentino anything competitively? you can argue it didn't help him I guess, and then we can have a debate about the ins and outs of the 2008 season. we can also have an argument that in a hypothetical world where casey isn't ill in 2009, valentino doesn't break his leg and casey isn't on a piece of junk in 2010, and valentino isn't on a piece of junk in 2011-12, then actually maybe valentino sparking open animosity with casey COULD have cost him. but we don't know that! didn't happen! I wish we could have found out, but we never got the chance! as it stands, the tally on this is pretty straightforward: casey won the title when things were reasonably civil between them in 2007, and valentino took control of the following season at the exact moment he worsened the relationship between the pair of them in 2008. obviously, it's all more complicated than that and casey would of course argue laguna didn't negatively affect his subsequent performances... but it certainly didn't help them. like, at the very worst valentino escalating tensions in 2008 is a complete net neutral. after 2009, them being bitchy to each other every other tuesday was completely competitively irrelevant beyond maybe affecting how they approached occasionally fighting for a podium position. hey, maybe casey used that feud to fire himself up through sheer spite throughout the later stages of his career, but that doesn't actually support his anti-feud stance - it's basically the exact same thing as what valentino does. they're both quite similar in that regard! always so hungry to prove a point, to show how someone else is wrong. kinda half the point with this feuding business is to get yourself going, get yourself motivated, yeah. he straight up openly admits to using yamaha's repeat rejection of him as a way of giving himself motivation, and at the end of the day that's really not all that different?
anyway, what else does casey say... oh yeah, that him and the other aliens were already kinda prepared for this and had learned vale's tricks. that valentino had only been able to get into the minds of the previous generation. welllllll *wiggles hand* sure, I mean, he did clearly have to change his approach... he couldn't just use the exact same playbook to get to them, either on-track or off-track. but that's why he did change up the playbook... again, whether you want to believe valentino won his final two titles 'in the head' rather than just through pure pace kinda depends on how you assess the evidence, but it is at the very least a debate. and, y'know, it's always worth remembering that valentino's most important mind games with casey didn't happen in a press conference... it was on the track. and the on-track stuff really is just embedded in how valentino approaches winning. speaking of aliens, this is what dani and jorge have said:
like, valentino's entire approach to his riding, even to the way he's setting his bike up, is deliberately about directly fucking with you... he's not actually always trying to be faster than you as much as he's trying to give himself the tools to make your life miserable, to pressure you into mistakes, etc etc... and again, especially with casey (if anything because he was so mentally sturdy), the off-track stuff was really just window dressing. (I know they bicker a lot after 2009 but it's just so fundamentally irrelevant to actual on-track competition.) so you can be aware of those tricks, but it also doesn't necessarily help you when someone's being nasty to you on-track in a way you just fully do not enjoy. which is what it was like for casey! for casey, a lot of this comes back to the truly unpleasant context of how he was perceived by the public, how he was treated as mentally weak or 'broken' or whatever partly because he had the misfortune of coming up against a bloke who had the reputation for breaking rivals. I think it's quite natural to end up with a bit of a hardliner 'actually I've never been mentally affected by a result in my life' stance - and of course casey is a lot tougher than a lot of people give him credit for. that being said. sometimes your rivals affect you, shit happens, it's part of the game. it's fundamentally a nice idea to think that valentino's tactics weren't just morally wrong but also ineffective, which is kind of the appeal of this narrative, right? you want to believe you're above that, you want to believe you were adequately prepared and wise to valentino's tactic. it's unsurprising and understandable that casey does tend to tell the story that way, but again it's *wiggles hand* also hard to describe it as completely factual
uh. what else. oh I'm thrilled casey does canonically know valentino and marc were friends, he has said he wasn't following motogp too much during that time period so you couldn't be sure of that. does this mean anything? does it tell you anything? well, no, but it's just a pleasing thought to me. I like that. oh also 'provoking particularly aggressive riders isn't a good idea' is kinda a funny take from casey? like, he of all people would hate the idea of being cowed by someone's reputation like that... casey's right that provoking fast riders can potentially be dangerous, but y'know I do think that's probably not news to anyone almost nine years later. um. that's all I've got I think
#i will say idm getting asks like this AT ALL but i do hope that's not like. the only bit of the podcast people are paying attention to#my thing with sepang 2015 takes is that like... when's the last time anyone has said anything genuinely interesting about that event#which yes big words from the feud blogger... but in fairness a lot of the sepang 2015 stuff is from old notes. that's my excuse idc#but that's kinda the thing... i feel like i haven't really had a new original thought about the whole drama for three plus years#u do kinda run out. basically the takes say more about the person saying them than about the actual event at this point#which. yeah. casey's comments on sepang '15 are primarily interesting in what they tell you about how he feels towards valentino#mind u he's actually quite nice about valentino in this one? casey call him let's finally organise that dinner#heretic tag#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#oh casey does go on another spiel against riders who win at all costs. ships that passed in the night of feuds i always say#also he gets the age he enters the premier class at wrong. i held myself back in the last post from pointing this out for tonal reasons#but if people want my podcast hot takes. i do simply have to mention it. just to set the record straight here#'they battle for podium places after 2009' genuinely. twice. like the alien era giveth but a lot of the time it really does just taketh#somewhat ironically casey wins the duel when he's on the shitty ducati and vale wins the duel when he's on the even shittier ducati#whatever that tells you idk#casey was always promising the laguna rematch would've gone differently and I love that conceptually but also we just don't know#he was like next time I WON'T play nice and it's like?? omg what does that look like. casey what were you cooking#for ethical reasons it's probably fine but for character arc reasons it's objectively ass that casey ended up being able to do all his -#- racing in a way he was entirely comfortable with for his second title in 2011. like it's just a complete waste of a year#you have this whole thing building for four years and then 2010 comes along and it's like. well that's enough narrative intrigue now! <3#also casey/jorge are fundamentally too interesting as individuals to have had such an obscenely boring on-track rivalry and yet here we are#it KILLS me because if you rearranged it and made valentino's dogshit ducati years like. 2009 or something#and do a straight title fight between jorge and casey THEN I genuinely think it would've been way more interesting#the problem with valentino is that he is fundamentally the WORST imaginable character you could invent to be casey's foil#literally everything about valentino could have been designed to be a casey-specific nightmare#but unfortunately that also makes him objectively the most interesting rival casey could have gotten#like morally it's on the edge. but narratively? literally could not have gotten a better villain in casey's story#constantly dancing on this faustian line of having to imitate valentino to beat him while trying not to lose yourself... juicy
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
I was at my peak when i would go to the local book store, browse through the books, read their backs and buy the one that appealed the most to me only to years later discover what significance they have for literature
#the boy in the striped pyjamas - how to kill a mockingbird - station eleven - and the mountains echoed#all of them bangers all of them (except the first one) picked up by teenage me from the book store and read in german#i mean ok obviously it's no coincidence they were selling best sellers obv i'm not big brain smart for picking them#but it was cool none the less to discover what significance those books had later on#after only picking them up bc the back side summary appealed to me. not knowing anything else about those titles#for instance station eleven gained prominense (again) in 2020/21 during the pandemic and i was like oh cool i read it idk 4 years ago#or when how to kill a mockingbird was being talked about bc (a) us (state) wanted to ban in as school lecture#when i was thinking oh i read this years ago i didnt know it was an important book in america#or when i liked and the mountains echoed so much that i got a thousand splendid suns & my german teacher told me she had liked the book#when i was thinking omg i read it as well and liked it!!!!#idk these were all things that made me feel really nice i look back at them fondly#nesi rants
9 notes
·
View notes
Note
i do not know if i ever sent this to you. i have posted it. i hope you like it Princess.
#uhhhhhm no you HAVE NOT SENT THIS TO ME BEFORE?!?!#I literally am speechless#I’m not super talky right now#but even if I was I feel like I’d still be fucking speechless#like I already said I love your writing 🩷#and it fucking BLOWS ME AWAY when people write about me or use me as an inspiration#like????????? what??????? me???????????!#I’m going to keep this close to my heart and look at it whenever I’m feeling down#I don’t remember if I said that already but it’s true#I need to get a journal or a cute box to put things like this in so I can just grab it and look through them when I’m feeling shitty#one thing I needed to say is the fact that you shared this with me now of all times??? is kinda crazy to me#idk if it’s a coincidence or if the universe/God/whoever/whatever is trying to tell me to go back into music and singing#not going to go into it too much but I’ve been looking at my life a lot lately#and I’m realizing I’m not getting any younger…. I know I’m still young but if I don’t do something soon -#my life is going to completely pass before my eyes and I really really don’t want that#I’m *finally* going to get mental help soon (long story but I have to wait a few weeks)#and once I’m actually mentally stable I can focus on what I want to do with my life#so I’ve been thinking a lot about my performing arts background and then randomly a get an email from a choir director I know#asking if I could please join the choir for their Easter performance cause they could really use my high notes#and she just kept complimenting me and it felt really nice ☺️#then when I went to the first rehearsal I sat next to this girl and we were singing a part and the first sopranos go up to a high A#and I can hit it easily but most of them couldn’t so it felt like I was going this mini solo lol#but she asks me what my range is and I told her that back when I trained I could sing queen of the night which I think goes up to an F6#and she was talking about how impressive that is#and it made me think about if I actually trained and got back into it how good I actually could get#I don’t mean this to be like ‘look at me look at me I’m so good’#it just feels nice to have a little bit of a direction again#who knows if I’ll actually go down the music path again but it does sound damn exciting#I miss it with all my heart - I miss singing and performing and acting… I even miss music theory#anyway rant over and i ran out of space but thank you so much I seriously can’t thank you enough 😭🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
i just had a very long complicated dream about some very ooc homestuck kids. jade might be rooted in some form of fanon at least but i dunno
#posts#i could b wrong abt jade. i really liked the way she was in this though#she was all the yay happy im jade harley niceness but also like. very self-righteous and impulsive#and very emotional. and stubborn. and protective of people she thought were being treated unfairly#she had an extreme reaction thinking someone was in danger cb of an outburst so she herself had a massive outburst and was panicking until-#-she found out they were okay and alive for now and then switched to just clinging desperately to them and getting very angry at anyone who#didnt show the same level of care and protectiveness for them than she was#like she was fully creating a two sides issue and staunchly choosing a side#and then when it didnt look like things were gona go any better she zapped her and her friend and one person who seemed kinda-#- neutral-positive onto a spaceship to escape as far away as possible#so. that. she was consistently the most easygoing with this random guy my dream isekai'd into the situation. which at times made her an-#-enabler or something bc she prioritized his comfort over any change ever even ones that could have been good for him#johns main part in this Story was he kinda just had an autistic meltdown and then pov guy had a similar situation not long later#on a larger scale and people in general were just even less nice about him because he was older and hadnt grown up there lol#also this dream was very much from random guys pov which was My pov#but it wasnt Me i was just fully some character. anyways#after pov guys massive outburst he runs back home where john is and john is not very sympathetic#he was very much projecting the shame an embarrassment he felt bc even though the people there at least knew him they still werent nice to-#-him either#so it was a ''i know from experience that You should know better than to have needs in public'' type deal#originally rose was there and then my brain switched her out for roxy. im so sorry rose#but either way the lalondechild had such a murky existence and it only solidified into roxy at the end where the confrontation thing was-#happening. with the jade freakout#there was also some Superpower Awakening shit happening? previously mentioned w jade. but john when pov guy came home had a white streak in#his hair and jades went FULLY white when she blew up#so thats cool i guess. her hair went back to normal the next time she was seen on the ship#there was some montage shit going on#anyways. insane fucking dream. can i steal this shit and make ocs.#like i said these kids were pretty ooc. i feel like parts were definitely still rooted in some perception of the characters butttt#its was just one or two small things. idk man all i know is i am thinking so hard about this
0 notes
Text
𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐘 𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓 | dbf!Joel Miller x reader
↝ other fics | requests? | ao3 | update blog | fic rec | ko-fi
summary | you're stranded, you need help—of course, Joel Miller is your savior.
content warning | listen. i wrote this in 3 hours, idk what to say. i had a thot and it went from there. its completely p w/o p, dbf!joel, age gap, moodboard is for aesthetic and reader is mostly not described aside from hair long enough to be put up, unhinged popsicle eating, eye-fucking, public-ish unprotected p in v car sex. listen i'm on my period rn don't look at me and thank you for my love, my twin, @chaotic-mystery for constantly supporting my gremlin behavior
word count — 3.2k
Out of all the people you had the chance of running into—of course it was Joel.
The chances were slim, but not impossible. You knew his work schedule well enough, similar to that of your fathers. He worked early mornings into the late evening, taking his commute home just as the sun was starting to set.
You gripped the gas can in one hand as you made your way down the side road, the other hand placed over your eyes like a visor to block the sun away. You didn’t even have a cell signal out here, so the walk seemed fruitless.
But, you had to find a gas station.
You thought you could make it home, which was clearly poor judgment, and the hair falling from the haphazardly tied knot on top of your head was sticking to your neck, eyes squinting as the truck pulled up next to you.
“Now, darlin’—the hell are you doin’ out here in the middle of nowhere?” Joel asks, the blast of AC hitting you in the face as he rolls down the window, arm leaned over the console as he looked you over.
It was clear you’ve been out here longer than you should and Joel doesn’t even take a second to hesitate before he’s popping the handle on the passenger door and inviting you inside the cooler cabin of his truck.
“Where are you comin’ from?” He asks, shifting the truck into drive before he rests his palm over the gear shift.
“A friend, I thought I had enough gas to make it home but,” You shrug, waving vaguely at your car parked on the side of the road as he drives by.
What took a fifteen minute walk to where Joel had picked you up was only a minute or so drive back. Joel looks at you wearily and turns up the AC, blasting the stray hairs away from your face but the immediate burst of cold feels like absolute heaven.
“Grab a water out of my cooler, sweetheart,” He gestures with a thumb over his shoulder and you scramble, leaning over the center console with your ass popped up in the air.
Joel assumed it had to have been a pool party, the skirt covering your bottom half doing nothing to hide the thin, strappy bikini bottoms you wore underneath.
Joel doesn’t mean to stare, but he’s worried that you might hurt yourself, his hand reaching out to wrap around your calf in an effort to keep you steady.
A subtle smirk plays at the corner of your mouth as you reach for the water inside the cooler and pop your head back up, your ass grazing his hand on the way down as you twist back into your seat.
Little touches were never a big thing with you two, normal and constant and nothing unusual.
A hand on your shoulder at family cookouts, his hands engulfing yours as he popped open the cap on your beer, a squeeze of his hand at the back of your neck when he hugged you after a month or two of not seeing you around your father’s house due to college or work, whatever was keeping you so busy. He didn’t try to pry, but you’ve been around less and less with each passing summer—so this unsuspecting time with you, he didn’t mind. It was nice.
Really nice.
You twist at the cap and take a drink of the water, so thirsty that it starts to drip out of your mouth, a small droplet down your chin, reaching your chest and down the center of your breasts.
“It ain’t goin’ nowhere,” Joel jokes, squinting his eyes as he hides the growing grin on his face with his usual frown.
“Sorry, being out in that heat like that…” You take a breath, recalling the bottle and putting it in the drink holder, “I just feel so stupid for thinking I could make it.“
When the street lights come into view, you know you're closer to actual civilization. And, just as Joel takes a right on the next intersection you stop at, there it was.
“It happens,” Joel comforts, “but you were lucky I was drivin’ home—can’t even think about what could have happened if I didn’t pass by.”
Joel pulls into the gas station and turns off the ignition.
“Well,” You flash a bright smile, squeezing at his shoulder—he’s got on a dark shirt plastered with the logo of the construction company he worked for, faded and slightly damp from his own sweat, “you did and I’m thankful for it, Joel.”
“Hand it over,” Joel motions toward the gas can, “I’ll fill ‘er up for you.”
“Joel, you don’t have to—“
Joel tilts his head toward the gas can at your feet, eyebrows raised and hand held out expectantly.
“Just hand it over.”
You sigh softly and relent, reaching between your legs to grab the plastic jug, knowing of the eyes that drag down your spine from the open back of your top, tied just as your neck and the side of your breasts spilling out of your swim top.
Joel knows a snag, just a simple hook of his fingers would send them spilling out into the cool air, nipples perked up under the mesh fabric of your top and—
“Joel.”
Joel’s eyes pull up suddenly, his face flushed but he’s lucked out by the redness of hot, summer heat on his face.. He clears his throat and grabs the gas can.
“Be right back,” He tells you, “stay put, alright?”
“And where would I go?” You retort playful, “I’m sure you’d find me again anyways.”
Joel chuckles to himself with a shake of his head as he departs into the store, handing a ten to the clerk before he takes a quick glance back at you, fanning yourself with your hand and chugging down another swig of water.
“Actually,” Joel pauses for a moment, holding a finger up as he lingers down the aisle toward the freezer and grabs out two popsicles, hoping that would quell some of the heat, even if for a moment—plus, he knew you had quite the sweet tooth, “there, just put whatever’s left on the pump and I’ll use that to fill it up.”
The clerk nods and scans the items, handing Joel off the receipt and he’s half jogging back toward his truck—quick to toss you the keys and the two popsicle’s he’d bought.
“What is this?” You ask cheerfully, eyes lighting up as they plopped into your lap.
Joel kept the driver's side open as he filled up the gas can, watching as you peeled eagerly at the popsicle, the red dye immediately dripping down your fingers as you pulled away the plastic.
“Just throw it on the floorboard—I’ll clean it up later,” Joel notes as you look around, placing the lid back on the gas can before climbing back into the truck, “you mind openin’ mine?”
You place the cherry flavored popsicle between your lips with an eagerness that forces Joel to look away, the sound of you peeling away plastic in his ear as he pulls out of the gas station and makes his way back toward your car.
“Thank you, baby,” He says casually—not all that odd either, he’s got a million nicknames for you, some trickier to let slip around others but there was an unspoken agreement. You never minded, never cared.
He was only ever Joel to you and he didn’t mind that either.
“Of course,” You smile, before dragging your tongue along the bottom of the popsicle and back up, sinking it back between your lips.
Joel just bites at it, not one to savor things very often.
You giggle and roll your eyes, the popsicle tip just as the edge of your lips before Joel is looking over at you curiously, ignoring the red stain of popsicle on your tongue as it peeks out.
“What?”
“Just—you’re not even trying to enjoy it, Joel.”
“It’s meant to be eaten, right?”
“It’s hot—it’s a cold treat, you’re supposed to make it last a little. Come on,” You hold the popsicle out for demonstration before licking up the side, sinking your lips back down in a show that was more for yourself, knowing how he constantly looked at you—if Joel chokes on the bite of flavored ice in his mouth you don’t see it.
It wasn’t a secret, how he looked at you. It’s been a few years since you left for college and teetering that line, nearing your mid-twenties now it seemed like it had only gotten more and more obvious. Joel’s never made his own advances aside from the one time your drunken state made you a little too confident, sliding between his legs at one of your family parties late at night, pressing a kiss right against his lips that ended far too quickly.
He did kiss you back though, you do remember that.
“Alright, alright,” Joel waves his hand at you nonchalantly, “you can cut that out.”
You raise an eyebrow, feeling the sticky sweet juice slip down your fingers as the popsicle starts to melt, nearly finished as Joel had already downed his own.
“I’m just eating the popsicle,” You brush him off, “that you bought me—“
“You know what I’m talkin’ about, sweetheart.”
You do, but that half second of lingering pause makes Joel worry he has read the situation completely wrong.
“What? Do you not like it?” You tease him, “Doesn’t it turn you on, Joel?”
You finish up the last bit before tucking the stick into the plastic and back on the ground, suddenly realizing the red dye had stained the front of your top, causing a frown to form on your face as you rubbed at the material.
“Shit,” You curse, ignoring the heated look on Joel’s face at your words, practically oblivious with the sudden distraction. You pull at the tie on the back of your top and bunch up the fabric as you stuff it between your lap, meeting Joel’s half-dumbstruck look as he tries to keep his eyes on the road but also can’t draw his eyes away from you, “what—I got it all over my shirt?”
Joel pulls to the side of the road in an instant, forcing the truck into park, “What are you playin’ at?”
You look at him with confusion, narrowing your eyes.
“What? Why did you pull over?”
“What are the chances of me findin’ you out here? On this road?” He raises his eyebrows expectantly, “Hm?”
You feign innocence for a few seconds before you cave, smiling with a devilish glint, resting your chin in your hand as you lean against the center console, your bikini top doing nothing to cover the plump of your breasts as the press against the fabric.
“Well, I mean—I figured they were pretty likely but—“
“Is your car even out of gas?”
You chew at your bottom lip thoughtfully, eyes tilting upwards in thought—truth…lie.
Joel seemed set on getting the truth. So, you give it to him.
“No, but I had you going, didn’t I?”
Joel is silent for too long and you raise your eyebrows in question before Joel reaches forward, tugging at the lever under his seat to send him scooting back.
“Come here,” It’s simple. An instruction.
But the look on his face—the intimidation shakes you to your core.
“Now, don’t back off,” Joel challenges, “it’s what you wanted, right?”
“As if you don’t want it either,” You counter, “you’ve been eye-fucking me since I got in your truck.”
Joel doesn’t even deny it, only waits. A simple nod of his head in a gesture for you to climb over and into his lap.
So, you do.
His hands immediately find your thighs and push up the denim skirt, your own hands resting at your sides as you scoot until your cunt is pressed up against the hard line of his zipper, the denim of his jeans so sensitive against your bare skin, feeling like all your senses were dialed up.
“We do this,” Joel starts, “there’s no going back. So, I need you to think if you really want this or—“
You surge forward, forcing the back of his head into the headrest as you swallow his words in a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss, tongues clashing with the taste of sugary sweetness.
“Gotta be quick,” Joel tells you, his words lost on deaf ears as your hands drag down his front, inhaling the faint scent of his cologne, the ironic freshness despite having worked in the heat all day, “can I fuck you, baby? S’that too much to ask?”
You shake your head, peppering soft kisses against his lips, along his jaw, feeling his fingers reach for each tie at your hips and pull, his hand immediately sliding over your cunt, cupping you with the warmth of his palm.
“Get it out, baby—got my hands a little busy right now.”
The heat in his words makes your pussy clench, but your hands move even faster, dragging over the front of his jeans and pulling at the zipper swiftly and Joel lifts his hips enough to get them down his thighs but that was it, hissing at the instant your hand closes around his cock.
“You got a problem with me fuckin’ you like this?” Joel asks, a true gentleman, but you roll your eyes. “Don’t even know why I asked—you’ve been beggin’ for it.”
You tilt your head, smiling at him playfully before you lick at your fingers and taste the remaining sticky sugar before pressing them along the center of your cunt, mixed with the already growing slick—Joel nudges at your entrance as you watch, the tip of his cock notched against your hole and your pussy quivers with the anticipation as he drags his cock up, down, up, before sliding in all at once.
It’s slow, but intense. Your eyes close, brow drawing together as he pulls you further and further down his cock.
“Open,” He breathes out, “open your eyes and look at how you’re takin’ me, baby.”
You blink quickly, grabbing onto his bicep for purchase as you look down, his hands squeezing at the tops of your thighs as he admired, watching the way his cock has you on the edge of near tears—a mix of overwhelming emotion and intense sensation.
Joel pulls at your top gently and it falls without much struggle, he bunches the material up and tosses it aside with your bottoms, massaging the swell of your tits under his palms as you rock your hips slowly, hearing the soft grunt behind his closed lips as you lean into his touch.
Flicking his thumb over your nipples, he admires the way the nubs hardered, like he’d imagine earlier—he tries not to dwell on how you both got here, like it wasn’t years of built up tension finally crumbling underneath you both.
“Don’t be shy,” He tells you, “take whatever you need, baby.”
As does he, leaning forward to press his lips against your breast, tongue lapping over the pert nipple before he sucks it into his mouth, drawing a soft sigh out of you.
You lift your hips, in time with the hand of his own that drops to your side to quicken your pace, “Wanna take my time with you but we can’t,” Joel admits, “gotta get home.”
You nod, knowing he had his own responsibilities as a father—you don’t argue, placing your hands against the headrest and raising your hips nearly off of his cock before sinking back down quickly, keeping that pace for as long as your body will allow, shared breaths into each others mouth as he hands travel from your tits to your face, the largeness of his palms engulfing your face as he brings his lips to your mouth again, again, soft whispers of words you know he doesn’t mean. Promises you know are fleeting and easy to break.
You couldn’t be with him, but you would take whatever this is.
“Just like that, baby,” He murmurs, grunting harshly into your ear as you tuck your head into his neck, his hand buried into the hair at the back of your head as you sink down onto his cock desperately, crying out into the side of his throat as he snaps his hips roughly, hitting so deep inside of you it makes you clench, biting down gently on his skin, “I feel it, I felt it.”
You snake your hand between your legs, finding your clit quickly and rubbing over the swollen nub, and Joel can tell by the neediness in your tone, moans broken into his skin as he fucks into you, haphazardly scanning the road for any passing cars—but he knew this place was always deserted, a shitty road that no one ever took.
Not even you, but today—it wasn’t a coincidence.
“That’s right, baby,” Joel sighs, head thrown back as he groaned out, “gon’ let me use this pussy, yeah?”
You nod instinctively, willing to agree with whatever Joel asked.
“Wanna fill her up,” Joel admits, forcing you to lift your head and look at him, head tilted down slightly to meet your eyes, “that alright, darlin’?”
You nod again, but coherent this time.
He loosens the reins completely by then, practically hauling you over his shoulder as he pounds into you, encourage the hand on your clit as he squeezes a handful of your ass under his palm, marking the skin with a few firm slaps that has you moaning out loudly into the sacred space of the truck.
“Joel, please—“ You gasp, “I’m gonna—right there,”
“I know, baby. I know.” He says softly, but the strain in his voice is obvious, groaning through clenched teeth as your orgasm crests, warmth spreading as you gush over his cock, the momentary bliss of sensation making your forget where you were, suddenly wishing that this had been a little less impulsive, wondering how Joel would treat you within the walls of his bedroom, buried in the sheets of his bed.
When Joel comes, it’s intense. His hands squeezing at your waist hard, his hips jerking out of rhythm as he stills you, coming inside of you with a deep groan, pulling you in for a frenzied kiss, laughing at how your faces uncoordinatedly press together, your nose smushed against his own and he kisses at the tip of your own as you pull away, his hair messier than when you started from your insistent grabbing and pulling during the heat of your orgasm.
He looked a complete mess, actually.
“You okay?” He asks after a long pause, his hand rubbing at your back, cock still buried inside you on the side of an empty road.
“Mhm,” You nod drearily.
“Baby, you gotta drive home now.” He tells you and you know—it doesn’t make it any easier, though. “Don’t pull this shit again, alright?”
If he’d see it any other way you would have flinched, but it was soft and comforting—not a warning.
“You need somethin’, you come knockin’ on my door.”
And you know he means it.
“Okay, I will.”
“Swear,” That was an order, “I need to hear it.”
“I swear.” You reply quietly.
Joel doesn’t push you away, though.
If anything, he savors the few moments he has in this dreamy afterglow, a taste of what could be—but you both know never will.
divider creds: @/cafekitsune
#joel miller#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x y/n#joel miller x f!reader#the last of us#tlou#tlou fanfic#the last of us fanfiction#pedro pascal#pedro pascal characters#my writing#dbf!joel
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
With Me Forever
Dark!Mommy!Agatha Harkness x fem!reader
Word count: 1.3K
Warnings: 18+ MDNI, Stockholm syndrome, Dubcon, kidnapping/confinement, psychological conditioning/manipulation, Mommy kink, emotional manipulation, pet play, loss of autonomy, magical manipulation, breeding kink, objectification, power play
Authors notes: Man Idk who took over while writing this one, but they were amazing.
The room is dim, heavy velvet curtains drawn over the windows, allowing only slivers of muted sunlight to filter through. You’ve been here for days—weeks, maybe even months. Time feels warped in this house, your new prison. Every surface is lavish, grand even, but that doesn’t dull the sharp edge of fear that grips your heart.
Agatha is watching you again. Her presence is unmistakable—she's never too far from you, whether you see her or not. You’d taken notice of a cicada in the room she kept you in. It never got too close to you, but always somewhere you could see it.
Her deep, sultry voice curls around your senses like smoke as she enters the room, heels clicking against the hardwood floor. She’s dressed impeccably, as usual, in a pair of dark purple suit pants, a white button up and a navy blue overcoat, her sharp eyes glittering with amusement as she watches you on the bed.
"Good morning, my little bunny," she purrs, her voice sending a shiver down your spine. "Have you decided to behave today?"
You turn your head away, trying to ignore the way your body reacts to her. Every fiber of your being wants to resist her, to fight back against the constant manipulation, but it’s hard—too hard—especially when your body betrays you. You hate how she’s gotten under your skin, how her touch has become something you crave, even as your mind rebels.
Her hands are the only touch you’ve felt in a long time let alone a nice touch, something tender that doesn’t leave a mark on you. Your body wanted more of it even though you knew this was all wrong. She kidnapped you. She’s keeping you here for her own amusement and pleasure.
Agatha chuckles darkly, sensing your internal struggle. She moves closer, her fingers trailing lightly along the curve of your neck. You flinch, but you don’t pull away. You can't.
"My sweet girl," she whispers, her lips brushing against your ear, "it’s only a matter of time before you stop fighting. You’ll see that everything I do is for you, for us. I could give you so much more than anyone else ever could including that other little witch you were so fond of. All you have to do is surrender."
Her words are a poison, dripping into your thoughts, planting seeds of doubt. She’s always been careful, never harsh and certainly never violent. Instead, she plays with your mind, with your desires, making you question everything.
Is it really so bad to want her?
To give in?
"You and I could be so much together," Agatha continues, her hand sliding down your arm, her nails grazing your skin just enough to make you shiver. "I know what you can do and I could teach you things that would make the world bow at your feet."
You close your eyes, trying to block her out, but it’s impossible. She’s everywhere, inside your head, inside your heart. Slowly, agonizingly slowly, you feel yourself breaking, crumbling under the weight of her words, her presence.
"You’ll never leave," she says softly, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. "Not because I won’t let you, but because you won’t want to."
And the terrifying part is that you know she’s right.
You feel her hand move over the curves of your body, goosebumps running over your whole body. Her fingers were always freezing as she somehow made your skin feel like it was on fire. The only movement you were allowed was to arch into her touch. Your body once again betraying you as it did just that, asking for more from her as you don’t dare look her in the eyes. She chuckles, dark and low, at the action.
“Your body doesn’t lie to me bunny. Look at me. Look at Mommy.” She’d started to call herself that. Mommy, you thought it was just a jab at all the Mommy issues you have and it very well might be the case, but fuck you just wanted to make Mommy happy. Yet you still want to fight against her. You don’t want to give her the satisfaction. Not yet at least.
Her hand starts rubbing your thigh, each stroke drawing closer to your heated core. You close your eyes, letting out a shaky breath. You feel her movement and the bed dips down between your legs. You’re moved slightly with where her weight is and you feel a hand on each thigh.
Her strokes are gentle as she leans down, her heated mouth meaning your skin. A rush of heat to your core hits and a needy whine comes out of you.
“All you have to do is ask, bunny.” She mumbles against your skin. This was the game that was played every time. Like some even more twisted form of conditioning. She’d wait until you were all needy, begging for her cock, begging to be bred by her. It wasn’t fair. You bite your lip debating if you want to hold out this time, you’ve done it a few times, but you’d always regret it because she’d work you up and ruin your orgasm each time.
“Please Mommy…need you…need you inside of me…” You manage out and Agatha looks down at you, slowly rubbing around your overly sensitive nub, but not actually touching it. You swallow hard before continuing. You know what she’s waiting for and you want to say it. You want her to know, need her to know.
“I’m yours Mommy please I’ll be your good bunny! Need Mommy’s cock inside of me. Only yours makes me feel good. No one else could make me feel good like you Mommy. No one could make me cum like you do Mommy!” You feel tears prick the corners of your eyes.
A smirk appears on Agatha’s face, a snap of her fingers and your clothes are gone. She has her purple enchanted strap out and ready. It was already pushing at your soaked entrance. Making it easy for Agatha to slip inside of you.
“F-fuck…” You arch into her, not realizing how much you needed her.
“You’re so tight, bunny. You feel amazing. Mommy’s going to make sure you feel amazing.” She manages out, you can tell she’s breathless just from entering you. Feeling how tight and wet you were.
“Please Mommy I’ll be your best bunny ever!”
She simply smirks as she grips your hips and before you can say anything else she’s pounding into you relentlessly. You can’t help but moan as she hits your spot over and over again. You don’t feel one of her hands move up to your head, it isn’t until you hear the Latin come out her mouth that you know she’s using her magic she’s making you more fuzzy, more needy for her. Another form of conditioning, her magic.
You watch her fingers, watching her hand flex and fingers move. It isn’t her magic making you fuzzy and needy. You grab her wrists and don’t think about it as you take her fingers into your mouth, sucking on them eagerly.
You look up at her with half lidded eyes, dark and lustful. You were ready to be completely hers. She could see it in your eyes.
“That’s my good bunny. Just like that. You’re Mommy’s bunny aren’t you?” She asks, her voice full of lust, her heated breath you could swear you saw. You nod and mumble an ‘mhmm’ around her fingers.
You don’t think it’s possible but she speeds up. You’re moaning around her fingers and she can tell you’re close. She keeps her pace, letting you fall over the edge as you let her fingers go, choosing to lunge forward to hold onto her as you rocked your hips into her. Her hands find their way to your back, her natural nails clawing down your back.
“My bunny.” You feel her fill you, her hot cum hitting against your walls. You were hers completely and you had been for a while, you knew that. There’s nowhere else you’d rather be, you don’t even remember that other witch’s name.
“Your bunny Mommy forever.”
#ley writes#ley writes one shots#leys kinktober writing#agatha harkness#agatha harkness x fem!reader#agatha harkness x reader#dark!fic#dark!agatha harkness#dark!agatha harkness x fem!reader#mommy!agatha harkness#mommy!agatha harkness x fem!reader#stockhom syndrome
459 notes
·
View notes
Text
When Did Blitzø Fall In Love With Stolas?
I just re-watched Helluva Boss S1 so i could numb the pain from Full Moon (it didn't work i'm not okay) and I had a few thought about Blitzø.
We all know Blitzø has a massive crush on Stolas and that he KNOWS that. Or at least he knows that he likes Stolas enough to enjoy his company and pay attention to certain things he likes even if they are just based on sex that is still a lot of effort for BLITZØ of all ppl bc he barely shows that level of affection to anyone except Loona.
But this begs the question; when did Blitzø realize he was falling in love with Stolas?
Looking at timelines he had to have starting falling for him before this picture was taken, because no way Blitzø would have taken that picture if he know that he wanted Stolas in a "more than sex" way. The way Blitzø's head works is that even if he can't admit to Stolas that he likes him (for fear of ruining their arrangement and any sort of "normalcy" that comes with it as well as fear of ruining Stolas' life) so taking and revisiting this picture is a way to feel his feelings without having to confront them head-on (see my post on Stolas symbolizing blitzø with the moon).
So now that we've established that it had to have happened before Ozzie's but also during one of their "meet-ups". When could that have been? Oh wait...
Blitzø fell in love with Stolas off-screen. During the post-TruthSeekers "thank you for the rescue" thing. If you think about it, this makes perfect sense. This wasn't a planned meet-up where Blitzø had to be reminded of Stolas' power over his business, it was Blitzø CHOICE to fuck him that night and Stolas did not have any tangible leverage over that decision. Additionally, Blitzø has never been protected ot cared for in the right way, he has always had to protect himself either because there was nobody to back him up or he didn't want to feel dependent or weak. He is constantly in survival mode and prides himself on protecting others.
The day TruthSeekers took place, Blitzø was protected, Blitzø was cared for. By Stolas of all people. Stolas saved him and the people Blitzø cares about when they were in a tough spot but also didn't make him feel weak by interfering immediately (before I.M.P got to kick most of D.H.O.R.K's ass). Stolas' timing was perfect and made Blitzø realize how nice it was to be taken care of, if you don't believe me:
So. Blitzø was falling in love with him JUST before Ozzie's....
That's why Blitzø almost cried when he dropped of Stolas at his house. Because he was finally learning to love again, and look where that got him....
IM REALLY SORRY STOLITZ SHIPPERS IDK WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME
#helluva boss#helluva boss stolitz#helluva boss stolas#helluva boss full moon#helluva blitzo#helluva boss blitzo#helluva stolas#hellaverse#blitzø#helluva boss truth seekers#helluva boss ozzie#stolas x blitz#stolitz#stolas#blitzo#helluva boss season 2#full moon episode
835 notes
·
View notes
Note
Idk how comfortable you are with this but like
Logan howlett x masc male reader. Like how would the dynamic go? How would logan figure out he actually likes reader
Also, I myself do wear masc clothes and act more masculine, which is kind of an insecurity I have within the gay community, but I do wear tighter fitting clothes which gives me away sometimes 😂, so maybe throw that into the fic if you’d like?
I’m not sure what you mean by the last part so I’m not going to use it but you can send me another ask and clarify what you wanted
LOGAN AND THE HOT GUY FRIEND
When Logan first saw you, you were sitting on the couch at Wade’s place. Wade had mentioned you came over sometimes to steal their food when you couldn’t be bothered buying your own. He watched you for a moment before walking closer and sniffing your scent. You were a guy… and you smelt good?
He came up to you and sat down. You glanced at him and then went back to watching the TV. He wasn’t expecting you to just brush him off like that but he guessed you were used to weird stuff happening at Wade’s place.
“So you’re the friend Wade was talking about?”
You turned your head to look at him and nodded. You looked him over and smiled.
“And you must be his new roommate?”
He nodded and then you turned back to the TV. You both sat there contently for a while before Wade came back home and interrupted it and you all had dinner.
The next few times were like that. You’d sit in content silence but each time, Logan found himself staring more at you than the television. You were more masculine than Wade sometimes and you smelled really nice. You’d both just sit there and watch sports or whatever else was on TV. Sometimes his arm would go behind your head and neither of you would mention it.
After a few times, he started talking to you and you started talking back and shared stories but he didn’t like you… right? Sometimes he’d say you looked good but that was just banter between guys, right? And there was no way you liked him.
One time when he came home from doing something and you were there, you were sitting in the kitchen instead. You’d stolen one of his beers and were about to open it. He was about to offer to help with his claw or with a bottle opener when you opened it with your teeth. You spat the cap onto the table and his jaw dropped.
You were the epitome of his type. You were cool and hot and you wore similar clothes to him and you were fun to talk to and you made him feel things, now they were vulgar things but they had been just butterflies in his stomach.
He grabbed a beer, sat down next to you and watched as you chugged it. He wondered if you’d put those lips around something else. With a shake of his head, he shook those thoughts away and started up a conversation again but now he knew that he liked you and damn, did he want you so bad.
pt 2 where they get together?
#x reader#x m!reader#x male reader#stormy writes things#logan howlett x male reader#wolverine x male reader#deadpool and wolverine#logan x reader#logan x male reader#logan x masc reader#logan howlett x masc reader#requested#wolverine x masc reader
343 notes
·
View notes
Note
hii can you maybe write some rafe angst (i just wanna cry)? idk maybe something about reader finally leaving him after too many chances and he feels like the world is ending or something like that ? btw i love ur work sm <3
warnings: angst, cheating
“it says that he’s at topper’s..” you glanced up from your phone, sighing to yourself when jade scoffed. “of course he’s at topper’s! but what do you think is happening over there?” your friend took a seat next to you. closing out rafe’s location, you couldn’t help but feel like you were crazy for checking it in the first place. “rafe said he was setting up shop for a party, okay? he’s just busy that’s all.” you sounded unsure, like you were trying to reassure yourself more than anything.
“oh, he’s busy all right.” shutting your eyes, you whimpered. “he hasn’t answered his phone, jade, i’m out of options okay? i’m just going to wait here for him.” she pulled you up before you could lay in self pity. “no you’re not. what we’re gonna do is go down there and catch his ass in the act, okay? you’ve been way too nice to him.” knowing there wasn’t anything you could do but go along with her, you found yourself in her car five minutes later.
“as your friend, y/n, it hurts me to see you go through this time and time again. this asshole doesn’t deserve you and it enrages me that you can’t understand that.” you listened to her rant the whole way to topper’s, your anxiety growing as you two got closer to your destination. “look, when we get in there just remember that no matter what happens you’re not going through this alone, alright?” you smiled at jade, pulling her in for a hug before you two stepped out of her car and made your way inside.
as usual, the place was filled to the brim with partygoers, everyone seemingly in their own world as you and jade walked through the crowded room. “where to?” jade shouted over the music, dragging you in the direction you pointed out to her. when you two made it to rafe’s usual spot, he was nowhere to be found. “y/n, what are you doing here?” topper looked on edge as he greeted you. “hi, ‘top. do you know where rafe is? i’ve been trying to get ahold of him..” you didn’t miss the way his eyes flickered upstairs.
“uhh.. you know what! he actually just left, yup. maybe you should go home and see-” jade cut him off, “you’re a really bad liar. upstairs, y/n.” you blinked, your feet moving before you could second guess this whole thing. your best friend followed behind you, your heart beating in your chest as you stood outside the only door that was closed. “ah, shit,” you heard rafe’s voice on the other side of the door, your stomach turning when another girl’s laugh echoed in your ears.
with a shaky hand, you twisted the door knob, your heart dropping to your stomach at the sight of rafe pushing a girl’s head down his cock. “rafe?” your voice was small but it made his eyes snap open. “baby? what are you doing here?” he scrambled up from the bed, pushing away the girl that was kneeling between his thighs. “what the hell!” she wiped her mouth, “you said you were single, asshole.” the girl flashed you an apologetic look as she walked past you and out the door.
tears filled your eyes. rafe cheated on you, again. “you told her you were single?” you whispered, the betrayal cutting deep through your chest like a knife. rafe moved closer, attempting to grab your arm. “no, no, it’s not what it looked like baby, i swear!” he fumbled with his belt, cursing to himself as you shook your head. “i can’t keep doing this with you,” you backed away, “i can’t..” rafe pulled you inside the room, locking the door shut.
“y/n, please let me explain,” he was pacing back and forth, holding his head in his hands. “she was giving you head, rafe. how do you ‘explain’ that?” you were eerily calm, staring at nothing but thinking about everything. “she was short on money for some blow, alright? she came onto me, it didn’t mean shit.” he reached out, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. “is that supposed to make me feel better?” you sniffled, swatting his hand away.
“to know that every laugh, every smile, every memory that we’ve ever shared together wasn’t, isn’t, enough to keep you from choosing someone else over me, just means nothing to you? do you even know what this is doing to me right now?” something about this felt different to rafe, and that’s what terrified him. “of course it’s enough, it’s more than enough. i don’t know why i keep doing this to you, baby, i’m so fucking sorry.” he rubbed his bottom lip, the blue of his eyes now sparkling with tears under the soft light of the room.
“you have it all, rafe. tanneyhill, your father’s business, ‘kook king’ status.. me. what more could you possibly want? what more do you need? the last few times you did this, i was graceful enough to overlook it because i was scared of what it would mean if i did something about it.” if rafe was terrified earlier, now he was damn near ready to drop to his knees and beg you to forgive him. “but i think i’ve just realized something,” oh. fuck. those words made him sick to his stomach.
“wait! please, baby, let’s just go home, okay? let’s call it a night. i’ll make a hot bath for us and we could watch your favorite movies until we fall asleep, just the way you like it, right?” you were seconds away from full on sobbing at his words, the memories of you two cuddling in bed and exchanging ‘i love you’s’ shattering what was left of your heart. “no.. no, i don’t think i want to do that.” rafe was quick, shaking his head as his mouth fell open slightly.
“y/n. this will never happen again, i fucking promise.” he got on his knees. “please.” you looked down, “i need you. you’re the one i want to share everything with. it’s you that i see when i envision my life five, ten, twenty years from now, babe. you’re it for me, i swear. this was just a mistake.” he was clinging onto the hem of your shirt now. “a mistake? betrayal isn’t a mistake, rafe, you chose this.” you planted your hands on his shoulders, pushing him away.
“i’m staying the night with jade but i’ll be back sometime this week for my stuff.” you looked away from him, not being able to trust yourself if you saw the pained expression on his face right now. he groaned, fingers dragging down his face as he got back up on his feet. “you can’t, y/n. please, you can’t do this.” rafe kept a hand on the door so you couldn’t open it. “i’ll do anything, baby, just tell me what to do and i’ll do it.” he pleaded with you.
“move your hand.” you spoke quietly. there was a long pause. “if i stay, rafe, i’ll never leave.”
#❤︎₊ ⊹ works#outer banks#outer banks fanfiction#outer banks smut#rafe cameron#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron drabble#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron imagine#rafe fluff#rafe outer banks#rafe edit#rafe x you#rafe fanfiction#rafe smut#rafe x reader#rafe imagine#obx#rafe obx#drew starkey
709 notes
·
View notes
Text
BORDER COLLIE - boothill x reader
- you, boothill, and your daughter spend a nice morning together, allthewhile you and your husband converse about a dog.
- i don't know why i made this i just thought it would be a fun little thing idk lol. i just had to add that little bit of jazz to the end bc like yk... idk anyways i'm trynna set myself on a better posting schedule and i think im starting off strong mmm enjoy
- all fluff, tiny mention of pregnancy at the very end, pre-cyborg boothill, his daughter is still alive here and everything is normal, wc 714
You were looking out the window, out at the vast amount of farmland you and your husband, Boothill, had decided to buy when he brought home the little girl you’re now able to call your daughter.
It was a nice, big place, suitable for animals of all kinds, and very family-friendly. You were currently watching your daughter play around with a baby goat that her father decided to bring out, a smile on all three of your faces.
She seemed so happy, waddling around the goat, clapping her chubby little hands when the goat gave a soft little lick to her cheek. She had just learned how to walk, and had been able to say a few words for the past few months now.
You walked out the back door, waving at Boothill before he waved his hand as a gesture to have you over by them. While you were walking over, you could hear your daughter shout “Goat! Goat! Cute goat!” While bobbing up and down with her legs and clapping her hands. It made you laugh a little bit before leaning into your husband's side. He wraps an arm around your shoulders, rubbing your arm up and down while supervising your daughter.
“Dada!” She squealed, giggling. Boothill ruffled her hair before leaning down to give her a kiss on her forehead, making her giggle even more. “Dada and mama!”
You smiled wider than you thought you ever could have. You were so blessed to have Boothill as a husband, and such a special, precious girl as a daughter.
“Well, we can’t really bring a goat in th’ house, n’ she seems to enjoy playin’ around with it a bunch…” Boothill said, standing next to you with his arms crossed. “What if we got a dog?”
“Really? A dog?” You looked up at him, and he nodded. “We have horses, goats, sheep, cows, and probably some reptiles living in the bushes. Do we really need more?”
He hummed. “The thing is, dogs can be domestic, hun. I got lucky this lil’ goat is so docile, good enough for her to be able to hang ‘round it without me having to worry ‘bout it taking her face off.”
“True. But we’d need a dog that can handle farmlife, not just any old dog. A boujee dog would not do very well in this type of setting. Keep that in mind.”
He laughed before shaking his head. “Nah. I was thinkin’ more like a Border Collie or somethin’. I’d rather have one that's gonna make use of all this land.”
Your daughter came up to the both of you, lightly slapping at your legs to get your attention. You picked her up, giving Boothill a signal to go put the goat back in its respective area before meeting the two of you back inside.
A few moments later, when Boothill arrived back inside, you had lunch started, greeting him before he washed his hands and helping your daughter wash hers, too. He explained to her that she’s always to wash her hands before and after touching an ‘outside animal’ (as he calls it, so her itty bitty brain can comprehend it) otherwise she could get sick. He does the same, too.
You set the table for lunch, putting some leftover salad and chicken on you and Boothills plates from last night. You gave your daughter some chicken too, but cut into very small squares, and strawberries instead of salad.
The three of you sat down to eat, occasionally conversing about random things. She was too busy picking at her strawberries to notice your conversation, but you both still kept a close eye on her.
“About the dog idea, are you sure?” You asked, your voice laced with some uncertainty. ‘I feel like we already have so much on our plate. Are you really willing to walk it every morning?”
“Well, o’course I am. I know what havin’ a dog is like, my dads always had one. I grew up around ‘em.” He takes another forkful of salad before going on. “But why’re ya so concerned? What else is stoppin’ ya from sayin’ yes?”
You smiled before laughing to yourself, leaving him temporarily confused.
“Well, I want to hold off on the dog, because…
…I’m pregnant.”
#honkai star rail#hsr#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#boothill#boothill x reader#fluff#x reader#x reader fluff#boothill fluff#hsr fluff#honkai star rail fluff#boothill hsr#boothill honkai star rail
479 notes
·
View notes
Note
hey hi, could i make a request? Im happy to see another good author starting :) u also seem very nice. could i request a yoongi x preferably fem!reader? if you want you can make it a genderneutral fic. my idea was a scenario were one of them is jealous, i thought of it being her jealous of him, over something stupid, but not in a toxic way like yk just pure jealusy mixed with insecurities. And they have a little petty argument and like it ends with smut i mean they make up to eachother that way :P like smut mixed with fluff at its purest. also, i am really curious to see how u write yoongi, i see many authors making him cold and tough but i believe that he is a very caring softie haha, by the morning wood headcanons, i think you got him very well ;) thank u in advance
REGRETS (m)
Pairing: Idol!Yoongi x FEM!Reader
Genre: angst, fluff, smut, one shot, request, established relationship
Warnings: jealousy, insecurities, a petty argument, depictions of sex, crying, emotional, oral sex (f receiving), vaginal fingering, bodily fluids, penetration (vaginal), a bit of praise, light biting, squirting
Word count: 5k
Summary: uhhh idk dude just read the request that’s pretty much it
A/N: UGH I LOVE THIS IDEA!! I don’t have much experience with writing angst so this was a really nice exercise. Thank you sooo so much for all the kind words, it’s what keeps me writing. I’m also a sucker for soft Yoongi so this is right up my alley. (Also this is not proofread so lmk if there’s any mistakes or anything)
Thursday night, it’s quiet outside. You’re trying to watch a movie with Yoongi. Key word trying. His hand has been gently rubbing your thigh for a few minutes now, whenever he tries sliding it up to tease you, you grab it and put it back onto his lap. He’s clearly trying to get you heated, but it’s having quite the opposite effect. Lately you’ve felt quite out of it, your lack of confidence causing you to avoid intimacy. With Yoongi being the gentleman he is, he always accepts it when he realizes you’re not in the mood and he moves on. However, you’re starting to doubt his ability to keep going like this. What if he realizes you aren’t satisfactory to him anymore? He could easily find someone else who would be all over him in seconds.
Replaceable. That’s how you’ve been feeling lately. He could have anyone he wants, so why you? “Are you not feeling it tonight?” Yoongi’s voice startles you out of your thoughts. “Huh? Oh. No I’m sorry.” You respond, your voice growing quieter with the end of the sentence. “That’s okay, c’mere.” He mumbles before pulling you into his chest, his hand soothing down your back.
‘Will he stay with me if I keep pushing him away like this?’ Is what you keep asking yourself. On one hand you’re afraid he’ll stop loving you if you stop showing him affection. And on the other hand, you’ve been so self conscious lately about your body and if you’re doing things right you don’t know if it’s worse to ruin the relationship by pushing him away or by not being good enough. ‘Do I even deserve to be with him at this point?’
Friday, 4:37PM. You got off work early today so you decided to stop by Yoongi’s studio. He’s still working so you’re lounging around on one of the couches inside of the room. The two of you had made plans to get dinner together when he finishes up for the day which you’re really looking forward to.
A short blurry figure appears at the studio door, they raise their hand up and place three quiet knocks onto the glass. Yoongi gets up with a huff and opens the door. In front of him stands a familiar woman, you can’t quite remember her name, but you’ve seen her around the company building before.
“Here’s your coffee Suga!” She says in a cheery tone. Her eyes land on you and her smile falls a bit. “Oh, I didn’t know you would be here. Sorry I didn’t get you anything.” She apologizes with a light bow of her head. You dismiss her with a wave of your hand before going back to fidgeting with the hem of your sweater. She turns her attention back to Yoongi who is setting his drink down onto his desk. “Hey Suga, a few of us are going to that barbecue place down the street for dinner and drinks tonight. Do you guys wanna come with?” She asks with a tilt of her head, her long black hair swaying with the movement.
“Uhh, yeah?” He looks at you quickly for confirmation to which you nod your head lightly. “Yeah. Sure we’ll come.”
Yoongi continues chatting with the girl. She casually leans against the door frame, the conversation between them flowing oh so easily. ‘It took me ages to be able to talk to him that smoothly. Why couldn’t I be like her?’ You think to yourself, trying your best to not let your irritation show.
He bids her farewell and sits back down at his desk. For the remaining time you spend in his studio all you can look at is him. Your gaze burns holes into his side profile, tracing each curve of his features over and over again. Why would a man whose heart only knows kindness, whose eyes and soul are so understanding of everything be with you? Your being is rotten with unforgiving bitterness, you seethe at every imperfection like a nun enraged by sin. Why would he want you?
He’s like a wild flower. He needs to be pollinated by the love and kindness of a bee to bloom, yet he stays with you, a caterpillar feeding off of him, biting off his flesh for your gain. Eating away at him and leaving nothing. Maybe you aren’t even a caterpillar. They can eventually turn into a beautiful creature with wings of eyeful colors, yet you can’t become anything more than what you are. You’re stuck in a vicious cycle, devouring every resource without paying any mind to the fact there will be nothing left when you’re done. What does he get for loving you if you can’t be of use? You can’t make him bloom.
“(Y/N)? (Y/N)!” You snap out of your thoughts, the reality around you giving you whiplash. Yoongi is kneeling in front of you, holding your jacket out. “Let’s go, we’ll be late.” You try to take it from his hands, but instead of giving it to you he holds it up so you can slip your arms inside. Once it’s on you he turns you around and zips it up for you. “Okay, let’s go.”
As you’re walking down the long hallways towards the elevators, Yoongi notices something odd. You usually grab onto his hand the moment you start walking somewhere together, but your hand is tucked away in your pocket now. He gently pulls it out and intertwines your fingers together. You can’t bring yourself to grip onto him like usual, instead you limply keep your hand at your side, letting him hold it. He’s a bit confused by this, but nevertheless he keeps holding you, his grasp only growing tighter in an effort to reassure you.
Yang Sunhee. Her name popped up in your head the moment she sat down across from you and Yoongi at the long wooden table. She’s been leading the conversation at your part of the table for a while now, mostly talking to Yoongi. To her credit she has tried to include you into the conversation a few times, but you didn’t really give her much to work with so she gave up.
You’ve been pushing your food around your plate for a while now. It’s mostly pieces of meat Yoongi placed down onto it for you, your favorite in fact. You just can’t get yourself to even place anything into your mouth, anxiety squeezing your throat so tightly you can barely even swallow your own saliva.
Sunhee is laughing at something, her eyes bright and her large smile hidden away behind a polite hand. Yoongi is laughing too, maybe not as hard as her, but he’s still laughing. ‘Why am I not the one making him laugh right now? Am I not funny anymore?’
As you’re glaring down at your food you feel a warm hand make contact with your shoulder. “You wanna go home?” Yoongi asks quietly, tucking a stray piece of hair behind your ear. “Yes please.” You breathe out, barely audible. On the drive home Yoongi tries asking what’s wrong multiple times, but all he gets in response is a simple “I just don’t feel too well.”
It’s been a few days now since you had dinner with Yoongi’s coworkers. He realized something was wrong so he’s been giving you some space. To be quite honest you aren’t sure if the space is helping or making it worse. After spending the whole day quietly sobbing to yourself in bed you decide to see what he’s up to. You find him sitting in the living room watching some sort of documentary and looking like he’s about to fall asleep. One of his cheeks is squished against a pillow and his hair is going on all the wrong directions. He looks adorable, your heart almost breaks in two knowing this is who you’ve been pushing away lately.
Taking a seat next to him, he lifts up his blanket so you can use it too. Just as you’re getting sleepy as well his phone pings on the coffee table. Instinctively you reach down for it so you can hand it to him, but when you see the contact name annoyance squeezes at your chest.
Yang Sunhee
Sent a message
“Why is she texting you?” The question slips from your mouth before you can even think it through. “I don’t know, let me see.” He responds while extending his hand out for the phone. You peer over at the screen, shamelessly trying to see what she sent. “Ah it’s just the schedule for next week.” He says and likes the message before setting his phone back down. Now you feel a bit guilty. Why were you questioning the intentions of this woman? She’s his employee after all.
Yoongi’s large hand comes up to cup your face, his thumb gently gliding over your cheekbone. “I know that look, what’s wrong baby?” He asks, his dark eyes skimming your face in search for answers. “It’s nothing.” You respond a bit too quickly, your tone stiff. The corner of Yoongi’s lip quirks up. “You’re jealous, aren’t you?”
Your eyes shoot open, “N-no!” you sputter out a weak defense. His hand slides down to your chin, the grip tightening a bit. His smirk spreads into a smile which angers you. He thinks this is funny?
“Don’t fucking touch me right now.” You say in a way harsher manner than you intended, tearing his hand away from your face. A flash of hurt runs over Yoongi’s face, his smile instantly falling. “Don’t look at me like that! I just- I need a moment right now.” You say in an apologetic tone. “You need a moment? I’ve been giving you a moment for days now. What about me? I keep trying so hard and you don’t show an ounce of being grateful. What’s your problem?” His tone gets louder as he talks, anger evident in his facial expressions.
“Problem? Oh it’s a problem now that I can’t always feel one hundred percent happy? Go sleep with some happy drugged out whore then if that’s what you want!” Without realizing it your tone has risen to a yell, you’re standing now, no longer in the comfort of warm blankets on the couch. “Don’t yell at me!” He yells back, tears beginning to brim his eyes.
“You’re yelling too asshole! Oh you’re gonna cry? Go cry to Sunhee, maybe she can suck your dick to make it better if you can’t go a week without me sucking it!” The moment you finish the last sentence a silence falls over the apartment. Yoongi stares at you wide eyed, unable to form a single sentence.
He looks like a kicked puppy, his eyes watery and his hands trembling. Realizing you went to far the only thing that pops up in your head is leaving the apartment for a bit. You speed walk to the front door, tugging your shoes on quickly and pulling a random jacket on. “Hey, hey! Where are you going?” Yoongi follows you once he realizes what you’re doing. Unable to look at his face you grab your keys and walk out, slamming the door behind you.
Not knowing where to go you walk to the nearest park. Taking a seat on one of the benches you stare up at the moon. “Why did I say that?” You mumble to yourself, tears stinging at your eyes. Your throat contracts, guilt choking you. There’s no holding back now, you let your sobs loose, tears running down your face uncontrollably.
“(Y/N)? Is that you?” A soft voice calls out to your right. Your head shoots up, trying to find the source of the sound. There stands Sunhee, she seems to be in her pajamas with a puffer jacket thrown on top. Her hair is a mess and she’s holding a leash. A little white dog sniffs around near her legs, you assume it’s her’s.
“What’s wrong?” She asks as she sits down next to you. “Ah don’t worry about it.” You mumble, sniffling lightly. “You’re so pretty (Y/N), I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone look good while they cry before.” Sunhee says with a genuine smile. “I- uh what?” You tilt your head to the side in confusion. “If I didn’t have a girlfriend I’d be jealous of Suga for having a girlfriend as pretty as you.” She giggles lightly.
“WHAT?” The question comes out harsher than you intend, the whole situation confusing you. “Listen, if you ever leave Suga just give me a call.” She says with a playful wink. You laugh in disbelief, your tears completely gone now. “You’re funny Sunhee.” You say, still sniffling lightly. “I’m not joking, but thank you.” She giggles along with you.
“Now why are you outside so late?” She asks while pulling her dog up into her lap. “I had a fight with Yoongi, I didn’t really know where else to go. I’m kind of scared to face him right now.” You answer truthfully. “Girl, have you seen how he looks at you? That man is a goner, I’m sure whatever you argued about isn’t that bad. You should go home and apologize, you can talk it through.” She says while giving you an encouraging smile. “You think so?” You ask quietly. “I know so.”
Even with Sunhee’s encouragement you’re still unsure. Guilt wracks through your whole body, pressing down on your insides and making you nauseous. You try to be as quiet as possible when you enter the apartment, but the sound of the heavy front door closing and jingling of keys betrays you. Just as you’re taking your shoes off you hear shuffling down the hallway. Yoongi’s dark figure emerges, you’re ready to hear something nasty from him, but instead you’re met with two warm arms wrapped around you.
“Thank god you’re safe.” He mumbles before kissing the top of your head. “I’m sorry Yoongi, I’m so sorry baby. Please don’t leave me. I didn’t-“ you’re cut off by a hiccup, your tears returning. “I didn’t mean to say any of that. Please, please don’t leave me I’ll never do that again…” You sob into his chest. “Shhhhh, I know you didn’t mean it, I should’ve done some things differently too.” His hand softly pets your head.
“I’ve been trying to figure out why you’ve been acting so weird lately and I think I get it now. You look at her like she killed your dog. You know she’s a lesbian right?” You can’t help but laugh a bit at that. “Yeah I kind of found that out just now.” You mumble, your fingers tangling into the material of his shirt. “Why don’t you like her?” You can feel him softly smile against your hair as he asks the question.
“I don’t know I just-“ You try to form the right words, but they won’t come. “Ugh! She’s just so pretty and she’s really open, it feels like she’s perfect and has everything you could need and I’m just sort of me? I don’t know, it’s stupid. I’m just projecting.” Yoongi listens intently to everything you say while he takes your jacket off. “Lately I’ve felt like the shell of who I was when you met me, you know? I’m just sort of bleh- and every other woman around me seems to have her shit togehter.” A tear runs down your cheek and Yoongi chases it away with his thumb.
“It’s why I’ve been avoiding having sex lately. I just feel gross and ugly while you… you look like you were sculpted by the ancient Greeks. You need a Hera to your Zeus. I’m like a satyr or something!” You let out a bitter laugh, trying to mask your feelings. “Hmm I think we’re more like Orpheus and Eurydice. Except I don’t want to lose you the way he lost her. They were such perfect lovers, yet there was something tragic about them. What’s love without tragedy?” He softly spoke, continuing to wipe your tears. You let out a genuine laugh and hit his chest lightly. “You idiot! You don’t get it.”
“I think I at least partially get it. I mean hell you make my knees weak whenever you look me in the eye woman, and we’ve been dating for years! I’d go to the pits of hell for you a million times more than Orpheus if it meant having a bit more time to spend with you. There’s no other person that could fulfill your role in my life as well as you do. I love you for you, you’re my muse. My light.” He places a ginger peck onto your forehead.
Love and desire suddenly flood through you, grabbing the collar of his shirt you pull him into a rough kiss. A few more tears make their way past your eyelids, but these ones of relief and joy rather than sadness and frustration. Yoongi gladly accepts your advances, kissing you back firmly. He barely wastes any time trying to get his tongue intertwined with yours. Your interwoven muscles becoming a metaphor for your souls combining together, the act of physical intimacy projecting your consciousness into one being, content and whole.
One of your hands shoot up to grip his hair a bit tighter than necessary which makes him release a deep moan. He pants against your lips, trying to catch his breath, but unable to fully separate your bodies. As he had endured yearning for you such a torturous amount, how could he let you go now?
He presses you flat against the door, holding you down chest to chest. His cold hands slide up your shirt, the contrast of temperature making you shiver. Caressing the skin of your stomach so lightly it tickles, he snakes one of his hands behind your back, swiftly unclipping your bralette in one movement. You let it drop to the floor, the only thing on your mind right now being the feeling of his body on yours. With his hands lightly ghosting over your breasts now, you shudder each time one of his fingers brushed against your nipples. Slowly he pulls your shirt off, the cold night air bites at your skin making your nipples harden. Instinctively your arms shoot up to cover yourself, but Yoongi stops you. He firmly grips your wrists and pins them down above your head.
Now fully exposed to him, he looks you in the eyes before licking a fat stripe from the area between your breasts to your neck. Lightly blowing onto the wet part of your skin, you take in a deep breath from the sensation. He begins to trail kisses down to your chest, letting go of your hands so he can bring you as close to him as possible. You tug at his hair softly as he mouthes at ode of your breasts, his tongue lightly teasing the soft bud. He groans softly before kissing down lower so he can get onto his knees.
He kneels before you know, unashamed of the submissive position he’s in. His teeth occasionally graze your stomach between sloppy open mouthed kisses. Looking up at you through his lashes, Yoongi starts undoing your pants. He pushes them down as if they’re getting in the way and moves his kisses down to your thighs. His uncalculated mouth moves dangerously close to your clothed cunt. Hovering over it he purposefully breathes through his mouth so you can feel his warm breath on your skin. You gasp when he suddenly pressed his nose against your pussy and inhales deeply. You can peel the tips of your ears heating up from embarrassment, but Yoongi doesn’t seem to care in the slightest.
“Ugh, fuck how I missed this part of you.” He groans as he kisses over the thin fabric. Finding your clit almost immediately he starts to roll his tongue against it through your panties. Your arousal and his saliva mix together in the material causing an uncomfortable need for real contact.
“Yoongi, take it off already…” you whisper to him, brushing his bangs out of his face. Looking up at you with a cheeky smirk he grabs onto the hem of your underwear with his teeth, making sure to lightly graze your sensitive skin with them as he pulls down. Your panties don’t even have the chance to reach the floor and his mouth is already on you again. He runs his tongue through your folds, making you instinctively angle your hips to give him more access. Heedlessly circling your clit with his tongue, he occasionally sucks on it or flicks it. You’re unsure if his mouth is glistening from his own saliva or from your wetness, but the sloppy noises he’s making are causing you to involuntarily buck your hips into his mouth.
“You’re so beautiful like this, my sweet girl.” He mumbles as he pulls away, nuzzling his head into your thigh. Replacing his tongue with his fingers, you let out a quiet moan when he slips them inside of you. “I love having you like this, only for me to see. You know I’d never do this for anyone else, right?” He emphasizes the question by pressing his fingers down against your sweet spot. ”Shit, Yoongi. I love you so much, no one makes me cum like you do.” Your response comes out in a dragged out whine.
Satisfied with your reply his mouth returns to your clit while his fingers work you open. The combination of sensations makes an orgasm built up in your abdomen fast. “Yoon- Yoongi, I’m gonna ah- I’m gonna cum!” You moan out, trying to warn him. This only encourages him to go faster as an orgasm ripples through you in harsh waves, your head falling back against the door as your eyes roll into the back of your head. You spasm slightly as he continues to work your cunt, trying to pull him away so he doesn’t overstimulate you.
He licks off your juices from his fingers, wiping his lips with the back of his hand. As soon as he’s back on his feet you go in for a kiss, leaning on him for support while still coming down from your high. He refuses to let your lips part as he leads you to the bedroom, his shirt and pants getting lost along the way.
“Lay down baby.” He mumbled against your lips as he led you to the bed. Kneeling down between your legs he made sure you were comfortable on your pillow. No matter how basic, missionary was always the best when you needed to express your love sexually. Parting your lips he pulls you down a little so your thighs are pressed together. He grabs his erect cock out of his underwear, not even bothering to get rid of the boxers. Pumping it a few times he gives you a dopey look, a lazy smirk spreading on his face.
“You ready?” He rasps out, rubbing the tip of his cock against your swollen clit, mixing his precum together with the aftermath of your previous orgasm. “A little too ready.” You replied, running a hand through your hair. “Mmm I can tell.” He teases while spreading the natural lubricant over his cock. Slowly he pressed the tip in, “Fuck, it’s going in so easily, o barely had to prep you. You really want it, don’t you?” his brows crease together in pleasure as he slowly bottoms out. “Yes, fuck Yoongi I want your cock so bad.” Your hand shoots up to grab onto his shoulder, biting your lip at the fullness.
“Please, (Y/N). Can I move?” He murmured, holding onto your hips tightly. “Yes, fuck me Yoongi.” You replied, grabbing his face to place a wet kiss onto his lips. He let out a low moan as he started thrusting into you, the warmth and wetness of your cunt feeling better each time he fucked it. You lightly squeezed your walls on purpose knowing it drives him crazy. “Oh my- ah shit I won’t last long at all if you do that.” He said breathily, his hips jerking forward involuntarily. You hooked one of your legs onto his hips, pulling him forward so he’s pressed into your cunt as deeply as possible. The both of you groaned at that, as soon as you let go he started thrusting into you with a quicker pace. His movements rapidly increased with each slap of skin that echoed throughout the space, his head thrown back. That look on his face means he’s absolutely lost in please and that makes you proud. He molds so perfectly inside you it makes all of your doubts melt away, it’s like he was made for you.
Matching the pace of his thrust to his fingers flicking your clit, Yoongi can swear he can feel you pulsating around him. “Ah, fuck (Y/N) I think I’m gonna cum already. Shit I’m sorry it just feels too good.” He groans, the already pink tips of his ears darkening. “It’s okay, go ahead baby, cum inside me.” You breathily respond, continuing to moan with each of his thrusts. He speeds up before abruptly stopping, the feeling of his warm seed filling you up making you clench around his cock. “Wait, shit, shit run my pussy please I’m so close too.” His fingers immediately speed up on your clit, furiously flicking it as your abdomen tightens again. As the hot white pleasure rips through your whole body, making your muscles spasm you hear a wet noise. Looking down the moment you can open your eyes you see Yoongi’s lower stomach covered in a clear liquid.
“Did you just make me squirt?” You laugh in disbelief. “That’s a first.” He mumbles before pulling his cock out, various liquids gliding down your ass. “I’ll go get a towel. He quickly gets up, trying his best not to make any of his surroundings wet.
As the two of you are laying in bed, your warm baked bodies pressed together, you feel Yoongi’s chest vibrate as he speaks up. “From now on, you always have to tell me when something’s bothering you, okay?” He softly says, stroking your hair. “Okay.” You whisper back. “Promise?” He questions while raising his pinky finger up, you lock yours with his, pressing your thumbs together. “Promise.”
#bts fanfic#bts fluff#bts x reader#bts x fem!reader#yoongi x reader#yoongi x y/n#yoongi x you#bts x you#bts smut#bts angst#suga x reader#suga x y/n#suga x you#min yoongi x reader#min yoongi x you#min yoongi x y/n#bts x y/n#bts x female reader
863 notes
·
View notes
Text
I trust you
masterlist ko-fi ao3
Summary: when Bucky comes back from a mission with a knife wound there is only one person who can convince him to get help.
Words count: 3.5k
Warnings: angst and fluff, injury, wounds, low self-esteem, bucky has trust issues and needs a hug, touch starved bucky,
Author’s note: ugh just let me hold my baby and kiss his cute sad face omggg... anyways, idk why I rarely write angsty things, I really wanna do something new, so if you have any ideas let me know! 💘
It was almost eight o'clock in the evening when FRIDAY reported that the guys' quinjet should arrive at the compound within an hour.
Steve, Sam, and Bucky went on another mission to destroy HYDRA almost two weeks ago. As usual, none of you could get any news from them because they couldn't risk giving away their whereabouts.
It was foolish to assume that you weren't worried about them. Especially for one person. Bucky.
You and the former Winter Soldier met about six months ago when Steve and Sam first brought him to the tower. Steve was really worried about his old best friend, so before bringing Bucky to the tower, he talked with the team and asked all of you to give Bucky space.
Of course, you knew who he was from the day Steve found out that Bucky was alive. You have seen hundreds of reports and photographs on TV and on the Internet about The Winter Soldier, a ruthless killer who was always invisible but too damn good at his missions. He is the man who was turned into a weapon against his will.
When Steve introduced him, the whole team just nodded and shared awkward smiles, and Bucky himself kept his eyes on the ground. The whole situation was too intense, and no one, not even the funny and sarcastic Tony Stark, knew what to do or say. You actually thought that it might be rude to just stand there and look at him, as if he was a wild animal. Looking at this shy and uncomfortable-looking man before you, you knew that the smallest thing you could get him was to show that he was welcomed in this tower and that everyone was on his side. So, pushing away your own shyness and nerves, you stepped forward, holding out your right hand.
"Hi, my name is Y/N. It's nice to meet you. I hope you’ll feel comfortable around here." You offered your warmest and most sincere smile, trying not to show nervousness.
Bucky slowly raised his head, genuinely surprised that anyone else had actually spoken to him besides Steve. It's nice to meet you. When had he heard those words for the last time?
Your eyes met, and you could have sworn all the air was out of your lungs. His eyes were even more beautiful than in those rare, high-quality photographs. He looked truly beautiful, with long hair and blue eyes, even though you could see that he was tired—physically and even more emotionally. You stood for what seemed like an eternity, looking at each other's faces, until Bucky got a little nudge from Steve on the arm.
Only then did his gaze move to your still outstretched arm. He hesitated a bit, unsure if he wanted to be touched or feel someone’s warm skin. It’s been too long since another person wanted to touch him without causing any harm. Even Steve gave him minimal physical contact. Always through the gloves or thick jacket, and Bucky didn’t know the true reason for this—whether it was because Steve cared about his feelings or he just didn't want to do that. But then Bucky looked at you again, and he already knew that you would be his death.
You were so beautiful. Probably the most attractive person he has ever seen. It was still morning, and he assumed that you planned to have a day for yourself because you had no makeup, your hair was a little bit messy, and you looked really comfy in a big sweater and a pair of black leggings. Oh, and he definitely noticed your cute, fluffy pink socks. Your eyes were full of friendliness and comfort, so it made him want to trust you. Your lips curled into a warm smile, and he had no doubt that you wanted to make him feel comfortable on the team.
Bucky lifted the corners of his lips slightly, meeting your eyes again, and held out his right hand to you, still feeling awkward. Especially when the whole team around you watches your interaction too closely.
"Hi."
When the Quinjet landed on the territory, you couldn't calm your pounding heart. Natasha, who was standing a couple of steps away from you, of course, noticed your condition but didn’t say anything and just sent you a reassuring smile. She knew you'd calm down when Bucky was by your side.
Sam got out first. He looked tired, had a couple of scratches and bruises, but was generally fine.
"Sam! God, I'm glad you're okay." You said, running closer to him. "How is Bucky? And Steve? Are they okay?" Your worried eyes ran across his face, trying to find answers, but he only pursed his lips and lowered his eyes to the ground.
"Steve’s fine, and Bucky, um... I think you should see it yourself. And I think you need to have a serious talk with this idiot because he doesn't listen to us." Your brows furrowed, but before you could ask anything else, footsteps and stifled moans were heard behind Sam.
It felt like your heart stopped as soon as you saw him. Blood flowed from his temple and lip, and an already darkening bruise adorned his right cheekbone. Your eyes rushed down, trying to find all the damage, and then you saw it. Bucky kept his right hand on his left side. His entire palm was scarlet red as the blood passed through his thick suit and soaked through his fingers. Your mouth opened involuntarily, and your eyes instantly filled with tears.
Of course, this was not his first mission, but he always returned almost without any injuries or with something that quickly healed because of his supersoldier serum. It has never been so bad.
Before you knew it, you were already standing next to him. Tears flowed freely down your face, and you raised your hands up, wanting to touch him, but they froze in the air.
"Bucky…" You sobbed, looking straight into his eyes.
"Hello, doll" He smiled reassuringly at you, but you saw how he pressed his teeth together to ease the pain. He didn’t want to scare you.
"Bucky, God, wh-what happened? You need to go to the hospital wing. You’re losing a lot of blood!" You gently took his metal hand, but before you could lead him away, he removed it and moved away a little.
"It's all right, doll. Nothing that I can't handle on my own. Trust me, I’ve experienced worse."
"Buck, Y/N is right." You notice Steve for the first time because all your attention has been focused on Bucky since he appeared. "That punk cut you pretty deep; it needs to be stitched up."
"You know, I never go to the hospital wing." He purses his lips awkwardly, looking down.
Of course. Of course you knew it. Everyone in the tower knew that the Winter Soldier didn't like being touched or visiting doctors, and he had never asked for any kind of help. He always limited himself to a short handshake or a pat on the back from his best friend.
But you also knew that Bucky couldn't take off his clothes in front of anyone. Too many scars from bullets, knives, and other things that HYDRA used to torture him He confessed this to you one evening when you were sitting in the dark in the common room after his nightmare.
In those six months, you got close enough to him that he trusted you to sit with him in the stillness of the night and share his fears. But he still avoided touching and, of course, did not want to show his body to anyone. Even you. Especially to you.
You were one of the few good things in his life. Someone who genuinely wanted to spend time with him, who wasn’t afraid of him, and who was always kind and supportive. Bucky didn't want to lose you. And he knew that if you ever saw him with those ugly marks all over his body, you would run away without looking back. Because who would like it?
The hand that took hundreds of lives. The hand that was forever connected to his body left a big reminder that he was, in fact, just an experiment that went too well. He often looked at his shoulder in the mirror with anger and despair, wanting to get rid of this mixture of scars and torn skin. Obviously, when HYDRA put that prosthetic on him, they didn't care much about looks or pain, so they just hooked it on the way they did.
"Bucky, please listen to me." You sobbed, moving closer to him again. "I know you're afraid to go there, but please, you have to do it, otherwise, you'll lose too much blood or just get an infection." You hugged yourself with your hands as your body began to tremble with concern for the person in front of you. "It can leave a big scar." You whispered and saw that Bucky’s jaw clenched again. You didn’t want him to think that there was something wrong with having scars, but you knew that it was emotionally too hard for him to deal with them.
"I'm sorry, doll, but I can't," he pursed his lips, shaking his head, "you know I can't do it."
"Bucky…" you whispered as more tears started flooding your face. You were so focused on Bucky that you didn't even pay attention to your friends, who stood aside and pretended not to eavesdrop on your conversation.
"Don't cry because of me, doll, please, you don't have to cry." Bucky's voice lowered to a whisper as he worked up the courage to use his thumb to wipe a tear from your right cheek with a metal finger.
You took advantage of the opportunity, grabbing his metal wrist and pressing his hand closer against your cheek.
"Please, Bucky. Then let's go to your room. I can help you if you don't want to undress there.
"I don't think it's a good idea either, doll. You don't need to see it."
"James," you focused on his eyes, rubbing small circles with your thumb into his wrist, "it'll be alright, I promise. I'm not afraid of you. I won’t leave. I'll take care of you. Please do it for me."
You were hurt by his gaze. You've seen a thousand thoughts go through that head. Doubt, fear, uncertainty, and pain. He couldn't lose you. Couldn't lose what you had. Even if he wanted so much more, he was content just being around you. He couldn't lose you to a damn ugly piece of metal attached to him.
But you looked at him like your life depended on it. Tears were still running down your cheeks. You were hurt because of him. But you refused to give up and let his self-doubt win this fight. You continued to gently massage his metal wrist as you placed a light kiss on it. And he could no longer resist you.
"Fine."
"It's better if we do this in the bathroom," you said as you closed the door to Bucky's room behind you. You quickly walked past him, going into the bathroom and pulling out the first aid kit you knew was in the bottom drawer. You felt comfortable being a little bit bossy here, and Bucky didn’t mind it.
He quietly followed you, watching you with an unsure face. His blood was still soaking through his arm, but that didn't bother him as much as the fact that he'd have to undress in front of you and that at some point you would touch him.
Once all the necessary things were ready, you turned to face Bucky, already preparing to help him out. But as soon as your hands went up to help him unbuckle his suit, he staggered back, and you froze with your hands in the air. For a few seconds, you silently looked into each other's eyes, then you moved, trying to understand his reaction, and what you saw made your heart ache.
His brows were slightly furrowed, and the corners of his lips were turned down. His eyes always told you everything that he tried to hide, and right now they told you how scared and insecure Bucky actually was.
"I don't think I can do it." Bucky whispered softly, casting his eyes down in shame.
"Hey James, look at me," you said, taking his face in your hands. "I'm your friend, you know? I won't hurt you. I won’t judge you. I won't do anything against your will. But I need to help you because I can see how much pain you're in," you sighed, running your fingers over his cheekbones. "I know it's hard. And I know you're scared or shy, but I'm here for you. None of this scares me, and I'll be as gentle with you as I can, okay? You can tell me if it becomes too much, and I'll stop. I promise." You could see the tears forming in his eyes, and you couldn't help feeling the pain that this beautiful man in front of you had been without care and affection for so long.
Bucky nodded slightly, giving you permission to continue.
"I’ll clean up your wound on the ribs, and then we can take care of your face." You carefully removed your hands from his, now placing them on the clasps of his suit. You opened them one by one, and when you finally got to the last one, you helped Bucky carefully remove that piece of clothing. Next on the way was a stretchy long-sleeve shirt, and by glancing at the wound, you could see that all the tissue around it was completely covered in blood.
"So, now I'm going to carefully lift up the shirt so you can take it off and not bother your wound too much, okay?" you asked, running your eyes over Bucky's face to understand his emotions. He took a deep breath, as if preparing for the worst, but nodded anyway.
You started to slowly lift up his shirt, helping Bucky pull his hands out one by one, and then tossed that no longer needed rag into the bathtub.
"Oh god," you muttered softly, looking at the wound that seemed to be even bigger now.
Bucky thought that you said it about his appearance in general, so he lifted his head up to the ceiling to stop angry tears from falling.
Come on, Buck, we need to sew this up so it doesn't leave a scar. Do you think you can sit on the counter next to the sink?" You looked at Bucky, but you couldn't meet his eyes. You knew that he was at the edge, his body trembled a little bit, but he still listened to you and silently jumped up on the free space near the sink.
"Bucky," you said quietly, trying to be as gentle as you could. "I see you right now, and I’m not going anywhere, you hear me?" You put your hand back on his face, making him meet your eyes. Before you could think, you placed your right hand on his chest, causing his eyes to instantly widen in surprise. His skin was very warm and silky, even though there were a lot of scars from different conditions. You gently moved your hand, showing Bucky that you’re not afraid, that you’re not a threat, and that he can trust you. "You're doing well, it’s okay," you said as you started rubbing soothing circles on his shoulder.
You backed off a little, finally picking up all the necessary things, and began to sanitize and then stitch up the wound. Every time you needed to put your hand on your skin, you felt Bucky instantly tense under your touch, but you tried to send him quiet words of encouragement and praise. Bucky was very quiet, not making a sound even when the needle pierced his skin. His face wasn’t in bad condition, and Super Soldier serum almost healed them, so you decided to only sanitize and clean his skin.
"Well, you did a great job, James. I'm proud of you." About twenty minutes later, you finally tied the bandage and began to put everything back in the drawer, but then felt a touch on your arm.
You looked back at Bucky, only to meet tear-filled eyes.
"No one has ever taken care of me in a long time, Y/N." You stepped closer to Bucky again, unconsciously placing your hands on his shoulders. "I feel ashamed of my body. Of that arm. I didn't want you to see those ugly scars. God, this is so pathetic—"
"Don't say that," you interrupted him. "That's not pathetic. I understand how you feel. That you have so many negative thoughts about yourself. But Bucky… God, I don't know how to properly say it." You paused for a moment, considering the words. "You're one of the most amazing people I know. And even if many people in the tower are scared or intimidated by you, for me, you are the sweetest, most caring, and most generous person. You remember every little thing I say, make me coffee and food when I'm too busy, pretend to like those shitty movies that I make you watch with me. I'm so sorry that so many bad things happened to such a good person that you feel unworthy of good things."
Suddenly, strong arms surrounded you, and you realized that Bucky was hugging you with arms wrapping around your waist. He nuzzled up to your neck, and you could feel light sobs. Gently, you entangled your fingers in his hair, massaging the scalp with calming movements.
"I don't deserve you, doll." Bucky pulled back a little, still keeping his hands on your waist. "I wish I could be normal for you. Be who I was back in the 40s. I would’ve asked you out and given you everything that you deserved. But that person is not here any more, and I'm not worthy of you."
He wanted to ask you out on a date? Your heart stopped as soon as the words left his mouth, and you stared at Bucky in surprise. "Bucky—"
"I know…fuck—I shouldn't have said that. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I'm sorry, doll. I didn't mean to mess anything up between us, I promise. I know you don't feel the same— it's okay, really. Just forget about—"
You didn't let Bucky finish by leaning forward and brushing your lips against his. His flesh automatically tangled in the hair at the back of your neck as the metal one tightened his grip on your waist. For the first few seconds, Bucky was in shock, not kissing you back, but just as you wanted to pull away, his lips began to move, taking over you immediately.
It was the best kiss you ever had. He was gentle yet so passionate. There were a lot of unsaid feelings that Bucky kept to himself for too long. All thoughts seemed to have left your head as the feeling of him filled your whole body.
When there was not enough air, you moved away from each other, touching your foreheads with your eyes closed.
"Fuck" was the first thing he said.
"Yeah," you laughed, finally meeting Bucky's eyes. He looked at you with such adoration that you felt butterflies in your stomach. You just noticed how much skin-to-skin contact you had. "Are you okay with that? Doesn't that make you uncomfortable?" You tilted your head as your hands squeezed his shoulders.
"That's... that's weird. I'm not used to that kind of contact," Bucky said, studying your face. "But I trust you, doll. You are the only person I trust completely." You felt him begin to gently run his hand along your back. "I'd like to ask you out on a date. I mean, if you want to. If not, I totally understand—"
You interrupted him again, leaving a quick kiss on his lips. "I'd like to go on a date with you, James. You know, you’re so cute when you’re shy?"
You've never seen his face so lit up with happiness, with a little bit of pink on his cheeks. Butterflies began to beat in your stomach again, and you realized that it was you who made him feel that way.
"Do you want to go to bed, put on some shitty comedy, and grab some food? I still have to watch over your injury."
"Sounds like a perfect plan, doll." Bucky kissed you on the forehead, interlacing his fingers with you, and led you to his room.
Even if it still required a lot of work, cuddling with Bucky, you knew it was the best place you could be.
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes#bucky fanfic#bucky x reader#bucky x you#james bucky barnes#marvel#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x you#james bucky buchanan barnes#james buchanan barnes#bucky x y/n
2K notes
·
View notes
Note
as much as i love cute festival fluff with togame (someone else pls send in an ask for it lmao), consider confessing to togame on valentines with homemade chocolate since he’s a big foodie & he, more than anyone, would appreciate the effort 🥰
i can see him maybe not clocking the intention right away either bc he didn’t have friends until shishitoren (+ find it hard to believe anyone would be interested in him like that) & the thought of choji of all ppl making him realize it’s romantic bc the chocolate reader gave him “wasn’t as nice looking as kame-chan’s :<” is soooo funny to me
GHHRHRJRH GNAWING ON YOUR ARM THIS IS ADORABLE!!!!! kinda teared up a bit ngl. imagining a soft blushy togame got me in my feels. i feel like (Also yes pls someone send in a cute festival date hc with togame/any of your faves!!!! I have things to say about our turtle guy in particular but we can do your other faves too. idk i'm in a yappy mood.
“you’re finally ready to confess to togame after mulling it over for months. you even made chocolates for him to (hopefully) immediately devour. things don’t go quite as planned though.”
𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 : none just fluff, gender neutral reader, reader’s jelly and an overthinker, togame’s in looooove, choji’s a little shit (affectionate)
full story under the cut! fully SFW.
standing at the gates of the ori, you bounce on your heels in sheer nervousness, eyes tirelessly darting around in search for togame with two chocolate boxes in one hand. one smaller one and one huge and beautifully decorated one. god your heart’s beating a mile a minute and your brain’s working overtime. what if he got into trouble? a possibility. what if someone’s confessing to him? of course someone would. he’s tall, handsome, kind, can cook—what’s not to love?
what if someone asked him out on a date? shit.
..what if HE asked someone out on a date? double shit.
oh god. oh no. your form visibly slumps at the thought, doubtlessly breaking your own heart again. but hey, on the bright side, you could eat your own chocolates, right? you made them extra delicious too, making them into flavors you know he’d like. you even snuck in some ramune flavored sweets for him.
…you know you’d hate eating chocolates for the rest of your life after this.
but then, the sun in the form of choji, shines through the dark clouds in your mind. your body visibly straightens back up when you hear his distinct laughter and endless yapping along with the soft crinkles of cellophane and boxes. listening even closer, you can hear togame speak and get promptly cut off by the smaller boy.
breathe. he’s here.
shit— what if those boxes you heard were all his and choji was just carrying them with him? what if he already gave someone a kiss today? what if he’d take your box of chocolates and hand it to his date instead?? what if—
“oh hey it’s bunny.”
you were just ready to walk away when you were stopped in your tracks by his deep voice calling out the nickname he so annoyingly picked for you. even when you’re looking away you could just hear him smiling. you turn, giving both boys a slight wave before you’re met with the absolute mountain of chocolates choji and him are carrying.
you’re not the only one who wanted to confess to him then.
“hey uh-mind adding these to your pile?” you say, failing to mask the sadness in your voice. you catch yourself though, immediately correcting yourself. “got these for you guys. no biggie, really.” you made the chocolates. granted the smaller box’s for choji and it’s way less decorated compared to togame’s. more ‘default’ chocolate box than ‘I have liked you for the longest time please accept my love’ chocolate box. you yap some more, digging your own grave, “these were on sale today so… thought you guys might want a snack.” you didn’t get them on sale. hell you made each and every single one by hand for the both of them to suit their tastes. god knows how much time you and him have spent talking about cooking and food.
but then choji gasps.
“hey! lying’s not nice!” choji chirps at you, dropping the boxes of chocolates on the ground unceremoniously. togame could only look on since his hands are already occupied with even more of choji’s valentines chocolates. the smaller boy looks at you suspiciously, albeit playfully. "you made these, didn't you?"
fuck. he noticed. you stare at choji like a deer in headlights now, too stunned to utter a single word.
he eyes the beautifully painted box in your hands and you pray for the ground to just eat you.
“iiiiis that one mine?” choji points at the larger box, eyes shining. togame looks on though, silent but his mind’s racing too. little did you know the chocolates they were carrying were all choji’s, given by his droves of admirers and friends alike. while togame didn’t mind not getting any chocolates this year and all those years before that, he finds himself hoping.
please don’t let that be choji’s.
“Wh-no! it’s-“ “-kame-chan’s? waaah his box is way larger and prettier than mine is!” he cuts you off, eyeing the boxes as you hold them in your hand. still, he takes his smaller box from you. “why’d you give kame-chan a bigger one? you like him or something?”
a pause.
“is that why you’re blushing?” he prods, wiggling a finger at you. "is that why you're blushing too, kame-chan?", he adds, wiggling two fingers at the both of you.
you could just explode at that moment.
“HUH?? What??? n-no! I mean YES-“ “oh so you do?” choji adds, cutting you off again. Taking togame’s larger box of chocolates from your hands, he shuffles through the chocolate boxes he dropped on the floor, handing the taller, now stunned boy his first legit box of valentines chocolates.
you three are blanketed in silence. with the exception of choji’s giggles.
"choji wait-" “welp, I’ll be in the ori!” he brightly exclaims, swiftly taking all of the chocolate boxes from togame’s arms and off the floor, leaving him with the single, most prettiest one in the bunch.
yours.
choji leaves you both with a playful wink and you both stand there, glancing at each other and fumbling awkwardly.
silently, he opens your chocolate box and is immediately greeted with a beautifully arranged selection of chocolates and sweets. his gaze flits from the box, to your reddened face and back again. you motion for him to eat. and he does.
he didn’t think it was possible to like you even more.
he pops one of the ramune shaped bites in his mouth and his eyes immediately widen in delight behind his amber sunglasses. pushing the glasses up his forehead to meet your eyes properly, you fail to tear away your eyes in time.
“sure you made these yerself, bunny? could've fooled me. these are restaurant quality. ” he says in between bites. his tone’s something he only uses around you and choji. vulnerable, safe, gently.
your heart’s beating way too fast for your own good.
“mhm. thought you might like that one because y’know… ramune and all.” you respond, “your favorite, right?”
with an acknowledging hum, he closes the box, twisting and admiring the beautifully decorated container, a forest green box speckled with gold and ornate lines. you really set the bar way up high for him. he smiles softly to himself and you swear you see his cheeks redden a tint.
“…can ya teach me to make them?” his voice grows softer, just enough for you to hear him. “how’s next weekend?” as soon as the words escape his lips, his heartbeat rises up to his throat. what if you didn't want to? he's never done this before, making the first move. he still can't fully grasp why you'd go so far as make something for him, someone who's only respected out of fear, someone who's wronged so many for just one cause. it haunts him sometimes. the Shishitoren could forgive him but he can't forgive himself. why would you?
you'll convince him soon enough. make him see what you see in him, what others see in him.
now's not that time though. your mind’s already in another dimension, thinking about him giving his date YOUR dessert with the recipe YOU made for him. letting out a soft disappointed sigh before opening your mouth, you respond, “maybe I could.“
“Maybe huh.” he echoes you, arching a brow at you with a small frown ghosting his lips.
“yeah, maybe. I could send the recipe over to you if you want. you could try making it with your date-“
“date? I want to make them for you next month, doofus. only you.” he retorts, wanting to get his point across. he realizes you're overthinking again. he's assuring you. meeting your eyes, he sees the shade of red on your cheeks darken. you look like a fish out of water, mouth agape and eyes wide. extending a hand towards you, he nudges your chin up with his knuckle. “y’know what that means right? I like you.”
a small gasp escapes your lips.
“you do..?” a pause. “why?”
he laughs, playfully pinching your cheek.
��I just do, cutie. always have. I take it you like me too?”
you nod. do it properly this time.
“yeah. I really do.”
he smiles, dimples deepening on his cheeks. he looks so relieved you like him back. you swear you feel like you’re on cloud nine — is this really happening?
“it’s a date then." he says as he reaches over to pat your head. "you better not flake on me, bun. Else I’d take that imaginary date of mine out instead.”
scoffing, you push his chest and he lets out a soft 'oof'.
“you wouldn't dare—“
“ARE YOU GUYS DATING YET??”
choji screams from the distance, the entire Shishitoren gang’s staring at you both from the ori, desperately waiting for the both of you to finish. they've been watching you both the entire time with bated breath. his friends are all cheering him on.
a pause.
togame reaches over to hold your hand, intertwining his long fingers through yours. hoots and hollers echo as he waves them off with a hand.
you could only smile up at him, squeezing his hand into yours.
he squeezes back.
a/n: hehehehe self doubt togame making me soft. MAKE HIM FEEL WORTHY GOD DAMN IT. DATE HIM AND DATE HIM HARD.
#wind breaker#windbreaker#nii satoru#satoru nii#jo togame#togame <3#togame jo#windbreaker x reader#jo togame x reader#togame fluff#windbreaker fluff#wind breaker fluff#bibi asks#bibi yaps#winbre fluff#TAKE TOGAME ON COOKING DATES I BEG.
412 notes
·
View notes