#idk much else but!!!! i hope this semi makes sense | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kamiversee · 6 months

Text

The F*ck List (semi-official) Breakdown.

The following was submitted by my lovely ☃️anon, & I needed to make this it’s own post given how long it is, my replies & clarifications are written in between this breakdown & theory (Ex: A/N > Etc.).

Here, you’ll find majority of details you may have missed & maybe even more to think about. Enjoy :)

(wc; 5.7k) (content; spoilers ofc)

holy shit Kami. i literally had to take the entire day to process everything. before anything else, i need you to know that you've created an absolute masterpiece. TFL was the first fic i ever cared to keep up with and it has set the bar impossibly high for any other writer out there. please take your time with TFL 2, i'm so excited to read your other work!! also a break sounds like it would be so good for your mind considering how long you've dedicated yourself to this story 😭😭😭 you're seriously impressive. heads up, i didn't proofread this at all bc i finished typing this at 4 am LMFAO so forgive me if it's all scrambled and makes no sense.

┏━━━

A/N > Thank you for taking the time to write this breakdown, I seriously appreciate it so I wanted to take my time in responding to it & engaging with you :)

┗━━━

now, on to the yap. i deadass cracked my knuckles before typing all this out.

┏━━━

A/N > You’re so real for tht ngl

┗━━━

i reread the entirety of TFL from chapter 1 and my brain is so melted from analyzing that i'll prob find more details tomorrow after i sleep on some theories 😭 BUT HOLY FUCK YOU REALLY WEREN'T KIDDING WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE HINTING AT GOJO'S OBSESSION SINCE LITERALLY THE FIRST CHAPTER??? the fucking hint being that "Gojo's desire for you is so strong it's almost frightening." GIRLLLLLL 🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵

your foreshadowing and referencing is insane. idk if you intended a lot of it, but a lot of it caught my eye.

┏━━━

A/N> I TOLD YOU GUYS IVE BEEN DOIN IT SINCE THE FIRST CHAPTER !! Okay not exactly but like there was a vibe I had from the first chapter & when I later came up with the twist & went back and saw that everything would connect perfectly ^.^

┗━━━

chapter 7; the reader and Gojo have lighthearted banter about how the reader "started this" situation.

"I made a mistake." [reader]

"A good one."

"Bad one." You correct.

this was regarding a completely different situation but it baffled me how much it connects to the plot itself; the reader making the "mistake" of leaving her door open, and how it lead to months full of trauma and love. probably completely unintentional, but such a good detail.

┏━━━

A/N > Very intentional btw, it’s supposed to be known that, in a sense, Gojo x reader is forbidden :)

┗━━━

Choso's still staring at you intently, "What version of you would someone not like?"

The way he words his question only furthers that little feeling in your chest. It's almost as though he were implying that any and all versions of you would be acceptable in his eyes. - Chapter 16

THE WAY WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT CHOSO WOULD STICK BY US REGARDLESSSSSSSS AAAAAA WE'RE SO BLIND!!! i just hope this stays true to the sequel :')

"No, I wish you didn't have to hate me." He says, shutting his eyes again and sucking in a deep breath, "B-But... it's uh, It's okay. I can live with you hating me." - Chapter 21

AAAA WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!!!! WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THIS WAS FORESHADOWING OUR FUTURE WITHOUT GOJO 😭😭😭 how he can live with the idea of the reader hating him so long as she's happy with Choso, especially considering his later revelations of how twisted his actions were and how if you stuck with him, he'd view you differently. fuck.

You despise the fact that he loves you. To you, it's almost entitled for him to feel like he has that right. How dare he hold such a strong emotion for you? If he felt this way, why is he forcing you to sleep with people for him? It makes no sense.

Why would someone claim to love you and put you through so much?

If he's been in love with you all this time, why start the list in the first place? Why couldn't he have just tried to win your heart from the beginning? Why the list? Why the blackmail? You don't understand him. - Chapter 23

i'm crushed. we didn't understand because we didn't know that Sukuna was involved. that could mean a million other things. i have some far-fetched theories about this but hear me out later!!!

the entirety of chapter 23 had me fucking floored while i was rereading. THE FORESHADOWING WAS EVERYWHERE!!! EVERY FUCKING WHERE

"No sweetheart, Sukuna's an asshole but..." His expression flickers and his smile fades away. He swallows and then clears his throat, "I'm pretty sure he'll satisfy you just fine."

...

You narrow your eyes at him, "Are you sure?"

...

"Fuckin' positive," Gojo suddenly sounds pissed and you grow concerned. The arm around you gets a little tighter while he walks you through some crowds and you keep looking at the man confused.

There's a vein popping out along his jawline because of how hard he's gritting his teeth.

of course he's aggravated because he knows that Sukuna is the one behind the list in the first place 😭😭😭 I'M SORRY WE DOUBTED YOU SATORU, FUCKKKK

——FIFTEEN MINUTES. That was the exact amount of time it took you to seduce Sukuna. The act was way too easy. Actually, it was suspiciously easy.

BECAUSE HE FUCKING KNEW 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

"What all did you plan on doing tonight aside from getting harassed by strangers?" Sukuna suddenly questions against your skin.

You ignore how close he is and the way his lips make you tense, turning your head to face forward. Chuckling at his last comment, "Same thing as everyone else here." You reply, slightly confused by his question.

"Bullshit," He utters, "Nobody dresses like this without the intent of gaining my attention," Sukuna claims while his hands slide back down along your body.

this 100% could be just him being cocky and Sukuna, but the recent reveal just makes this feel like an extra demeaning interaction. but of course, it's Sukuna.

chapter 24 is so fucking shady too with everything we know. i know you addressed some of these points already bc i brought them up in previous anon messages, but these things still had me paranoid;

the way Sukuna leaves us and tells the reader to go to his room after a certain amount of time (i know he could have just been tidying up real quick but everything about this man has me on edge)

┏━━━

A/N> A lot of people are on edge about this but I’ll be honest, there’s nothing crazy that happens in between this time period. Not saying nothing happens but nothing crazy— it’ll be addressed later (in the next fic most likely)

┗━━━

the way he's been consistently on the phone since the reader entered the room, which is shortly after she messaged Gojo saying that she'll be able to cross Sukuna off of this list by tonight which he wasn't happy with at all.

no seriously, he kept diverting his attention to something in the bathroom and then came out, still on his phone. maybe he's talking to literally anyone else but STILL I'M PARANOID

┏━━━

A/N> This is to show the fact that Sukuna is a very socially active individual, & hints to the theory (I think you later state) that he has connections.

┗━━━

this happens in chapter 25 but the way he keeps smiling while the reader kisses him is just so smug of him especially considering the original reason as to why the reader's even interacting with him

then the spicy chapters with Sukuna…

the foreshadowing that the lack of knowledge of Sukuna's reputation will come back to bite her in the ass; first with the knowledge that he is abusive, and then her finding out that he is the curator of the list, knowing the full details of her blackmail and even threatening her again.

WHO DID HE FUCKING FIGHT HELPPPPP MY MIND IS BOGGLING there's no way it's Gojo, right? they're both too unscathed in these next few chapters for there to have been a fight between the two of them.

┏━━━

A/N > It’s not Gojo. 🙏

┗━━━

THE FUCKING MOMENT WHERE HE CONTEMPLATED SOMETHING WITH THE PHONE IN HIS HAND??? I FUCKING KNEW IT. I FUCKING CALLED IT WAS SOMETHING SHADY AS HELL.

┏━━━

A/N> The other Sukuna hint I was talking about is right before this moment btw, you’re welcome ;)

┗━━━

then he has the audacity to hold his tongue right afterwards?? it's such a big hint towards the fact that he knew about the list from the beginning UGHHHHHHHH.

the way he tried to humor the reader about her "job" even though he was in on the whole thing. UGH. SUKUNA WHEN I GET YOU SUKUNA?? 👊👊👊👊 especially with that "whore" joke right afterwards. i can't stand him. i know that it's implied that he has a twisted view on women from having abusive women in his life (his mom and his ex who he punched) BUT STILL. he's so lucky he's fictional and hot.

the fact that we're able to pick up on the fact that it's a "crazy coincidence" that he continues the whore jokes UGHHHHH HE HAS BEEN PLAYING US FROM THE STAAAAAARTT

Gojo got upset at something from Sukuna's party, he didn't want you to call yourself a whore all of a sudden, Sukuna seems to have believed that was your actual job, and you remember how pissed Gojo seemed as he thought about you sleeping with Sukuna-

Holy fuck. Are the two connected somehow? Is something going on? What does Gojo owe Sukuna? Does Sukuna know you only slept with him as payment to clear Gojo's debt? Is-

GIRL YOU WERE ALMOST THERE!!!! YOU ALMOST HAD IT!!!

┏━━━

A/N > I love teasing in my narration by nearly spoiling things 😹

┗━━━

---

seriously though, these chapters killed me. the official end obliterated my heart. it's so fucking bittersweet i want to scream at the top of a high building. the reader ends up happy and with someone she loves, which is fantastic for her. she deserves that after everything she went through. Choso treats her so, so well.

but Gojo. with the theories i have, i feel horrible. i was so harsh towards him as a die hard Choso girly but these endings changed me. i just hope i'm right.

the fact that his healing journey is harsher than ours makes this ending sting so much. he's healed, and you can see it with his demeanor from the call and the way he interacted with the reader.

we were always made aware of the way he looked at us such deep attachment. the initial gleam shows that he's happy to see us, but that he's not reliant on us for his happiness anymore. he's finding that on his own, and it's a grueling process for him. i wished the reader gave him a hug, but that would probably make me feel even worse.

┏━━━

A/N> He gave her a lil side hug (with his arm over her shoulder) & was resting his head on hers at the end if that makes you feel any better 😅

┗━━━

"Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start." i'm gonna throw up bro i'm so sad. i'm proud of his growth. his obsession was so, so strong but he always prioritized the reader's happiness over himself. i know that being self-sacrificial is so core to his personality but it doesn't make it suck any less. i'm devastated. i started blasting mitski in the car on my way to work after reading this.

i thought i was ready for the journal burning. i was so ready for this tie to be severed, for them to finally move on. but i failed to realize that it could ultimately mean a life without each other. it makes sense as to why, but it still sucks.

kami i need that poly ending before i cry my eyes out at 4 am rn. you know i can't handle angst, but bittersweet endings lowkey hurt me even more. i need all my babies to be happy. i desperately need it.

but that alt ending... fuck. in a horrible, sick, and twisted way, i'm relieved. i'm a Choso girly from the bottom of my heart but i can't let this Gojo go omfg. even if he shows up for one more chapter, i think i'll be alright. BUT IT BETTER NOT BE FOR DEATH KAMI!!!! I HAVE A FEW EXCERPTS THAT SUGGEST DEATH FLAGS BUT I AM SIMPLY NOT LOOKING AT THEM. DON'T DO THIS TO ME KAMIIIIIII. i need this boy to be frolicking in a field of flowers or something. my heart can't take this.

┏━━━

A/N> I know I reference death a lot but that’s just to add a sense of how dramatic the characters are 🫶

┗━━━

---

okay, time for my mind-fucky theory. pls bare with me. if it wasn't obvious by my last post, i'm 100% on board with the theory that Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo, which started this whole thing. but the thing that is getting me is how this all connects. i have some assumptions that could make sense, but there are a handful of gaps. here's my thought process;

Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo by using his obsession/love against him.

we are already familiar with the fact that Gojo has liked the reader for years. there was a chapter where Gojo mentioned that it started off as a "crush" but he was so oblivious to his own obsession up until the reader mentioned it to him. it's to the point that he didn't understand what was wrong with the idea of hurting people for the reader. who's to say that Sukuna didn't catch him in some sort of heinous act regarding the reader like stalking?

┏━━━

A/N > You’re cooking with this one and I almost, almost had to go get the fire extinguisher :D

┗━━━

Gojo didn't understand the difference between love and obsession until later on in the story. this would be consistent with the implication that Gojo just loved her so deeply that his morals were askew as we have yet to find out how far his love goes.

what if Sukuna caught him in the act of doing god knows what, and brought up the fact that if the reader found out about this, that she'd get super freaked out and would do everything she can to get away from him (considering probably barely knew each other, if at all, at this point). but why would Sukuna devise such a plan over a money bribe? well, Sukuna's already revealed to be wealthy, and maybe he was bored. the same line that Gojo kept repeating to the reader whenever she questioned him as to why he did it. what if Gojo asked Sukuna why he's blackmailing him, and he said the exact same thing; "I was bored." we see how much Sukuna mirrors Gojo's speech by calling the reader "sweetheart" often, what if Gojo did the same thing?

┏━━━

A/N > Gojo & Sukuna do have a few parallels in this story & they will be addressed more in the sequel.

┗━━━

we wondered in chapter 23 how Gojo reaches out to these men to ensure their debt is "paid," but considering how oblivious everyone else on the list is to Gojo owing them anything, it would make sense that he only reports to Sukuna as he is ordered to do so. but two things stumped me on this theory overall.

the reader said that she used to party a lot and get involved with boys before Gojo. if he was stalking her for so long, why did he wait so long to approach her?

what specifically would be the blackmail that Sukuna has on Gojo?

regarding the first point, it's been mentioned that Gojo has been "scared of women" and was shy when it came to approaching the reader. he knew of her for so long, but was able to constantly slip under her radar. considering how much of a pervert he is, it wouldn't have been surprising for him to sneak around and watch in on the reader hooking up with other guys. after all, these guys were probably complete strangers to him and all he cared about was you. remember how Gojo was basically able to tune out his own best friend, Suguru, when the reader was hooking up with him in their living room? it wouldn't be wild to assume that he was able to do the same for your other hookups as he spied on you.

to connect this with second point, what if Sukuna caught Gojo being a peeping tom on the reader during a party hook-up? while being so distracted in the act of spying, Sukuna spots him. the reader wouldn't be alright with the fact that someone who's barely an acquaintance (if that, depending on the time this occurred) to her has been perving around and watching her have sex without her consent. she would do anything to get away from Gojo, and of course that would crush him. Gojo tried to buy Sukuna's silence by any means necessary. so, Sukuna generated a list of people that he and Gojo mutually knew for the reader to fuck. the reasoning for it would be the fact that Gojo has to sit through the process of having the girl he likes fuck a bunch of guys besides him, and the fact that Gojo knew all these men would make it sting more. plus, he has a reputation for hookups. (chapter 8)

┏━━━

A/N > You’re like RIGHT there with it and yet not there at the same time omg 😟

┗━━━

but why would Gojo agree to this deal with Sukuna, and why would he also go with the method of blackmailing the reader? it's basically a guarantee that the reader would be scared away regardless. but again, we could recall that Shoko mentioned that he was too "scared of women" to approach the reader at first. this was his chance to finally approach her. plus, "once that video is gone, there is no excuse he'll have to be around you." (chapter 8)

---

but the more i thought of this reasoning for the two points, the more bizarre it felt. so what if instead of Gojo being a peeping tom, it was Sukuna. we get so many hints that Sukuna has eyes and intel everywhere. we get an indirect implication of this when he called us out for rolling our eyes during our phone call with him. yes, it could be completely by chance, but it's still a great hint that he "sees everything" and "knows everything." we get an even bigger hint towards this in the alt ending when he directly references The F*ck List.

┏━━━

A/N > Others have taken note of how Sukuna knew she rolled her eyes but trust me, that’s just to show that Sukuna knows the reader’s body language more than he’s let on & paid attention to her a lot during the time they were together.

┗━━━

it wouldn't be too far fetched to assume that he has some shady videos taken of people without his consent, some possibly acquired through other people (like how Gojo was revealed to have sent Sukuna the video of the reader from the first chapter). what if Gojo caught Sukuna with the video, threatened him to delete it, and Sukuna counterthreatened to have it be sent and posted everywhere. it would be highly ironic, but consistent with the way that Gojo and Sukuna practically mirror each other at times. the reasoning for the list choices would still be the same for this theory, too.

---

my citations for these theories ☝️🤓

“You once asked me if I love you because I blackmailed you or if I blackmailed you because I love you and my answer is both,” Gojo confesses as he turns to meet your gaze, “Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start.” - Chapter 56

loved you from the start; his obsession has been consistent from the start (supports Gojo being a peeping tom theory) or he has always had a deep concern for you (supports him wanting to stop Sukuna from spreading blackmail of you instead).

“I’ve sacrificed everything for you, y’know.”

“How? What’s everything that you’ve sacrificed, hm?”

“You. I sacrificed the woman I love to make her happy.” Gojo admits, and of all he’s said thus far, that feels like the truest statement.

“I could’ve been happy with you.” You remind him.

He laughs, “Yeah well, I’m an idiot.”

You scoff, “That’s all you have to say?”

“Yup.” - Chapter 56

is he an idiot for being a peeping pervert instead of just approaching you normally? maybe. how does this make her happy? she ends up finding love through Choso, through the list, through the blackmail.

But deleting the video means ... he has no more leverage over you and can't force you to help him with the hole he's dug for himself. - Chapter 8

the hole being the blackmail set against him by Sukuna.

Gojo's behind you cursing at himself for being unable to tell you the truth.

He's so scared that you'll never help him without the blackmail and, well, he has every right to be because you're pretty sure that if it weren't for those videos he has over your head, you wouldn't be doing any of this. - Chapter 9

the videos he's referencing is the original video from chapter 1 and the fake video he lied about with Suguru, but he can't tell the reader the truth because it's too twisted and risky (supports Gojo peeping tom theory).

He silences himself in thought. There are so many ways he could go about answering such a question but the possibilities of how you may react are endless. Plus, you're drunk and if he's going to admit or explain anything to you, it'll be while you're sober.

"Because..." Gojo's voice gets so quiet that you almost don't catch what he says, "...I don't have any other choice." - Chapter 21

if he didn't go through with his list, Sukuna would have went through with Gojo's blackmail, thus resulting in either you getting as far away from Gojo as soon as possible or Sukuna's video being sent around.

He let something slip abruptly, "W-Wish I c-could tell you everything, sweets..."

Your brows furrow at that.

Are you missing something here? - Chapter 22

YES GIRL!!!! SUKUNA'S BEHIND THE WHOLE LIST, HE'S BEHIND THE BLACKMAIL GIRLYPOP

"Anything," Gojo says, meeting your gaze. He's so serious that it's almost dark the way he looks at you, "I'd do anything for you." - Chapter 29

"I meant it when I said I'd do anything for you."

You follow his motions and then end up right back in his arms, "Right..."

"I'd sacrifice the very thing I love just to see you happy." Gojo claims proudly.

You scoff, "Thought' I was the thing you loved?"

"You are."

His words bewilder you, "Then that makes no sense."

"It won't." Gojo shrugs. - Chapter 29

🧍‍♀️

anything. even if it means putting your body, heart, mind, and career on the line. directly supports the theory that Sukuna initially had blackmail on the reader.

"We're the same, y'know..." He suddenly says, his voice breaking again, "We both want someone so terribly bad but our situations prohibit us from getting that person."

"You could've prevented all this though..."

Gojo sniffles and you feel a drop of wetness slide down his cheek and slip against your palm. The man was crying? Why? - Chapter 30

this whole time we've been told that Gojo and the reader share more similarities than the reader realizes. what Gojo is to the reader, the reader is to Choso. while Choso now knows of the men that the reader slept with, he doesn't know why. he doesn't know about you being blackmailed. you know that you had to sleep with these men. you don't know why. you didn't know it was because of Gojo being blackmailed.

"For loving me, Satoru. It's not a crime," You say, mocking a comment he made to you earlier, "You're allowed to love me. So, for that, and that only, I forgive you."

Those words healed so many more wounds in his heart than you realized. It was like that was all he ever needed to hear. If Gojo's mistake was loving you and that's what caused this, then you forgive him.

If in some twisted way, his feelings started the list, you forgive him.

COME ON NOW.

There’s so much going unspoken but the two of you knew what either was saying, you understood each other more than either of you realized. - Chapter 35

“Well,” Gojo sighs heavily and then draws your hands off his face, leaning down to you a bit, “Sometimes, sacrifices need to be made in exchange for one’s happiness.”

“Are you telling me that all this was for the greater good?” You quiz as you raise a curious brow.

“Something like that, yeah,” He shrugs. - Chapter 45

You tell him, “If I had one wish, it’d be that you did that from the beginning.”

Gojo opens his mouth to say something but then he swallows his words down. He nearly fucked up.

“All you had to do was talk to me,” Your shoulders raise into a shrug as you move a hand to the doorknob, “Things could’ve been different if you did.”

“Even if I’ve been obsessed with you since the beginning?” He questions and he’s stepping closer to you again. He can’t possibly wrap his head around that possibility-

You laugh a bit, “Especially if you were obsessed from the beginning,” You didn’t know it but that statement right there made the man feel as though his world was falling apart, loads of regret tumbling over him as he stares at you with wide eyes, “Satoru I think you forgot but, before all this started, aside from Shoko… I was lonely.”

Gojo’s throat goes dry and he fails to form a response to that, “I…”

“If you had just talked to me one time, and more than a hey or how are you,” The way your eyes soften, a slim sheer gloss of tears coating your gaze as you speak to him, “I would’ve fallen for you.”

He grits his teeth, “Don’t tell me that.”

“But it’s true.” You say.

And just like that, Gojo was crumbling all over again. If only you knew how much he regretted everything after hearing you say that. - Chapter 46

if he had just spoke to the reader before all of this, maybe she wouldn't have gone to those parties, hooked up with those people, and caused whatever kind of blackmail Sukuna had on Gojo (or on her).

He wishes he could take it all back, his feelings for you included. If only he could go back and stop himself from ever being curious about you. That’s what started it after all. Because, at the end of the day, Gojo knew who you were before you knew who he was— hell, even before Shoko knew who you were. - Chapter 53

then what is the timeline of his obsession starting? has it been before Gojo? could his blackmail have taken place even before Shoko introduced you two, adding to the weight of the threat that Sukuna held over Gojo's head (regarding the peeping tom theory).

┏━━━

A/N > The timeline on Gojo’s interest, not obsession just yet, on the reader will be addressed in the sequel so this’ll be answered there <3

┗━━━

---

but there were certain parts that stumped me and my theories so i have some weird reasonings around them;

It's selfish of him and seriously fucked up but, he's said it before and he'll say it over and over again-- you're all he has. He made promises to everyone on that list, promises of delivering a woman to them at some point, and of course, he couldn't convince anyone he knew to do such a thing.

So again, the situation with you just happened to be a coincidence.

The problem is that Gojo hates that it's you. He hates that you're the one he ended up doing this to. - Chapter 8

Gojo's known to be a silly guy so it could make sense that he actually did promise these guys hookups for reasons unrelated to his blackmail. after all, he does have a reputation for getting people hookups. the coincidence is that Sukuna now has dirt on Gojo and wants to toy with him. by making the reader sleep with them the guys he coincidentally owes hookups to, he fulfills his role/reputation and relieves his debt at the same time. two birds, one stone.

┏━━━

A/N > As we later learn that some of the “debt” Satoru claimed to have isn’t real, we can also infer that his reputation & the promises he’s made to these men were done out of coincidence. Take Toji for example; tell me you can’t see an interaction between him & Gojo where Gojo gets a bad grade and wants to get it up so he taunts his professor with the idea of getting him a hookup & Toji would laugh it off considering Gojo’s reputation ;)

┗━━━

another thing that stumped me is why Gojo got so worked up with the reader referring herself as a whore, and the connection to Sukuna. my delulu reasoning is that once Sukuna threatened Gojo with blackmail by either of the two theories/methods i mentioned, Sukuna casually referred to the reader as a whore. that caused a major fight between the two, possibly even getting physical (which can refer back to the implication that Gojo has hurt people for the reader).

the fight could have increased the tension and severity of the situation, so Sukuna decides to add Choso to the list knowing how easily attached Choso gets. in chapter 5, the reader and Gojo were discussing the list and Choso specifically. Gojo was even noted to be relieved when the reader had mentioned that they'll just have to hope that Choso doesn't get attached, as he obviously holds deep feelings for the reader. Sukuna knows that by going through with the blackmail with Choso involved, Gojo most likely will not end up with the reader if Choso get attached and the reader reciprocates those feelings.

also, the counterargument that Sukuna and Gojo are actually friends/allies in this situation just doesn't sit well with me. it would make for a crazy twist but it just feels too out of character for Gojo. but then again, how would Sukuna specifically know about The F*ck List? but idk, it just feels so wrong to me. maybe i have too much faith in Gojo lmfao. after all, he has consistently shown a great dislike towards the guy since chapter 23. but maybe it's my denial speaking. i really don't want to think of Satoru going through this whole arc only for it to reveal that he truly is a piece of shit. pls don't do this to my pookie my heart cannot handle it </3

┏━━━

A/N > Remember, Gojo is a good actor & you go a long period of time in the book not realizing he’s not as much of a villain as he pretends to be 😉

┗━━━

there's that moment after the reader fucked Sukuna that still messes with my brain. with my theories, my brain's thinking that he contemplated on collecting even more blackmail on the reader. for what reason? idk, to be an ass? to torment Gojo further and add more to his blackmail? but maybe he decided not to because he already has plenty of blackmail on the reader (if the theory of Sukuna having a video of her from way back then is true) and fucking her knowingly made Gojo pissed considering all the dirt Sukuna has.

so why can't Gojo tell her the truth now? why does he want to wait years in advance? maybe he's hoping that by that time, not only will you forget and not care about the situation overall, but maybe Sukuna will forget all about it as well. the chances of Sukuna holding on to the reader's blackmail for that long is slim and the reader would most likely be in a situation where she is completely separated from Sukuna depending on her job and living situation with Choso. the stakes are lower than if he were to reveal everything to you now, at a moment where your life is still so uncertain. it would go against his wish for you to end up happy.

┏━━━

A/N > Maybe Gojo doesn’t tell her the truth because he can’t, just as he said 🌚 Perhaps he’s not allowed to yet. After all, why would Sukuna even tell the reader he made the list in the end? ^.^ Just some food for thought!

┗━━━

---

regarding the future of TFL... fuck, bro. i have no fucking idea. i'm too caught up in the (presumed) past. i'm mourning fr. i love this fic sooooo fucking much. whenever you decide to pick up on the sequel, i will be there. if you choose to publish anything else in the meantime, i will be there. thanks for such a fun and memorable read, Kami. i'm excited to bookbind this soon 🤍🤍🤍 now, i need to watch blue lock to shove these feelings down.

yap fin (for now)

-☃️

A/N > I love you sosoosooooo much for this. These theories are like reading an entirely new fanfic sometimes except, I know all the answers & what’s going to happen next, which only makes me more excited ^.^ Thank you for taking the time to make this, thank you for reading, thank you for supporting, just, THANK YOU.

This right here is exactly what I write for; people like you :)

To the others reading this breakdown & theory, thank ☃️anon because she’s a damn godsend & ilhsm ^.^ (definitely showing favoritism rn, sorry not sorry, ily all I swear)

Edit; Since you’re watching Blue Lock, I can’t wait to bring my Shidou fanfic here because a lot of the drama in TFL has inspo from that fic, which I wrote first ^.^ & I could totally see you enjoying it because not only is it a childhood friends to lovers than enemies & back to lovers troupe BUT it also includes Itoshi Sae x reader which ofc, adds hella drama :))

P.S. It’s two am as I finally post this and omg sorry it took me a while, I wanted to answer other anons first before unpacking this badboy, again, tysm!!

#the f*ck list #tfl!theories #tfl spoiler #tfl #k!ans: ☃️

157 notes · View notes

legendofmorons · 1 year

Note

Hi! Im new to requesting here so i hope im not late or sending you something thats against your rules. I also hope something like this hasn't been requested before.

Could i request some semi-romatic chain x reader (platonic for Wind because he's baby) where the reader needs to go do something (example: shopping, hunting, scouting, etc) and they need one of the links to come with them because they aren't the best at fighting/aren't familiar with this hyrule. So the way they get their attention is by calling for their "Pretty boy". Bonus points if the chain(again platonic for Wind) had a crush on reader!

Idk if you've seen that tiktok audio/video where someone goes, "Pretty boy, with me I say!" "..." "..." "Oh! I'm pretty boy?" "Yes! That came out a bit too quickly-" "...pretty?"

All i can think of is basically reader accidentally calling the link for you choice "pretty boy" subconsciously. The reader could either play it off and the link could tease them or reader can go all in and continue calling said link "pretty boy".

Hopefully that makes sense and/or isn't too much? Also if possible could you make the reader gn? If you don't do it already? Also if doing all of the chain is too much you can just choose specific one's, i dont mind who you pick. Anyways thanks for even reading my request and i hope you have a good day!

I'm happy to do this! This is such a good idea and I'm excited to write it. If I didn't do it the qay ypu hoped let me know!

I went for vague crushing vibes on all of them, but Wind's. If this isn't what you had in mind please let me know!

-In alphabetical order and names are in bigger writing than the story parts

Pretty boy (chain)

Pairing: Chain x reader (seperate), Wind & reader

Rating:

Summary: you call the boys 'pretty boy' these are the results

Warnings:

Other: -In alphabetical order and names are in bigger writing than the story parts

-------

Four

You don't necessarily love going shopping. You don't hate it either, but it's not your definition of fun. So obviously you want someone to come with you.

Four is always fun to have around. He's sweet, and he's surprisingly good at haggling down prices.

"Do you need anything else?" Time asks you, eyeing you over and counting off your weapons for self defense.

"Not really." You say, turning towards the path.

You observe the dirt road before turning your head and calling over your shoulder, "Come on, pretty boy, let's go."

The entire group goes still and silent. They're all staring at you.

Why are they staring?

You replay your words. Oh- shit. You called Four pretty boy.

Well- he is a pretty boy but still!

You turn back to the group, taking in their confused expressions before your eyes land on Four.

Well.... You might as well commit.

"Well? Are you coming, pretty boy?" You ask, flashing a smile to show the playful intent behind the question.

Four blinks a few rides. And then points to himself slowly.

"Me?" He asks.

"Yeah, c'mon, pretty boy."

Four gives a little half fought off smile. "Pretty boy?"

"Do you not like the name?"

"No- I like it."

"Good. Come on then, I could use the company." You say.

Four follows you. It's hard to miss the little giddy pep in his step when he seems almost inclined to giggle.

You'll have to call him pretty boy more often!

Hyrule

"You should take someone with you if you're going to the dungeon. It's better with help." Time says evenly, "And take plenty of fariea and potions. Okay?"

"Okay." You say, "Let me grab my things and I'll bring Hyrule."

"Good idea."

You go to your little space in the clearing, grabbing your bag and making sure you have plenty of equipment. You don't like having to rely on other people all the time. No one does.

You finish getting yourself ready before you turn to Hyrule, "Comr on Pretty boy, you're with me.

"Did you just call Hyrule 'pretty boy'?" Legend asks, a sly look crossing his face.

"No!" You defend, face flushing as embarrassment crawls up your spine.

"It's okay!" Hyrule assures quickly, his own ears tinging with a blush. "I like that name!"

"You do?"

"Yeah!"

You smiles a little, glad he isn't upset about it. "Well... good!"

"Soo.... you think I'm pretty?" Hyrule asks, and his grin is anything but innocent.

"Maybe?"

"I knew it! I'm definitely your favorite."

"Good god." You groan, but you can find it in you to really be upset.

If only they weren't all teasing you the rest of the day. Oh, well.

Legend

You find yourself stuck on middle watch, which is the Worst. Capital W and all. Like for first watch you stay up late, last you wake up early.

But middle watch? You get woekn up and then get to try to go back to sleep later.

Gross.

Maybe someone is awake?

You scan the group, finding what is to be expected at this point.

Time sleeps as still as a log, hand one over the other on his chest.

Warriors sleeps like a soilder, light and still but heavy enough all at once.

Wild, Twilight, and Wind are all in a tangled bunch of limbs. Though to your surprise they managed to pull Four and Hyrule into their cuddle puddle tonight.

Sky sleeps all sprawled out and half out of his sleeping roll.

Then you land on Legend- who seems to be trying to get comfortable. Is he awake?

One way to find out.

"Hey! Pretty boy!" You stage whisper at him.

You don't know what possessed you to call him that. But you did, amd you don't think you're wrong.

He actually sits up, looking to you. "What?"

"Oh good, you're awake!"

"No shit. What did you call me?"

"Uh-" you pause, having hoped he would either not care or not notice. "Pretty boy?"

"That's what I thought. You got a crush on me?"

"I can think you're pretty without having a crush!" You hiss out, face flushing with embarrassment.

Maybe he is right.

"Bummer." Legend says, "Here I was thinking you had fallen head over heels for me. Since I'm your pretty boy.c

"Oh my god. Just forget I said it."

"Nope!" Legend says.

"Whyyyyy?" You groan.

Sky

You are over again pulled into upkeep chores that the quest requires. Which, whatever but you wish you weren't stuck on laundry today.

Laundry sucks with only the river, soap, and sun to do it.

Thankfully, you have Sky to help you. He's such a sweetheart that you really do appreciate his help.

So you settle at the river with the pile of clothes and some soap and resign yourself to the repetitive chore.

You cast a look to where Sky is and call out within much thought. "Come on, pretty boy! Might as well get started."

Sky and Twilight both go still before turning their eyes to you. Both looking fairly bewildered.

Oh. You said the 'pretty boy' part out loud. Whoops.

At least it's just Twilight and Sky here. They're not too bad about holding things against you. Usually.

"Me?" Sky questions, looking fairly confused but maybe just a little flattered.

His ears have a hint of pink on them.

How cute!

"Yeah?" You say, but it comes out a lot more like a question then he'd like.

"I've never been called that before."

"Real? Like- not ever?"

"Never.... I like it, though. Please keep calling me that?"

"Sure, if you like."

"I would."

You smile softly, bit your eyes go back to the laundry. "Well come on, pretty boy. We still have laundry to get done."

Time

You'd ask why you're the one who's always in charge of day to day things like groceries, supply runs, socializing, and all of that.... But you've seen the others try. Some are better in these aspects then others- but you are still the best.

So you're in charge of it.

You've already split the work and have the group gathered around you to hand out the assignments.

"Alright, Four, Warriors, and Sky, you're on weapon inventory. Wild, Hyrule, and Twilight's, you're on market duty. Wind and Legend, you're on laundry."

The others all share looks with their task partners.

"Where am I?" Time asks.

You give a smile when you speak, though you swear the nickname is an accident! "Your with me, pretty boy."

Silence.

Complete and utter silence.

Shit.

You said that out loud.

"Did you just-" Time starts.

You cut him off with a tight voice, "Can we please pretend I didn't?"

Warriors just laughs at you, the ass.

"I didn't say I hated it." Time says simply, though you can see the shit eating gleam in his eyes.

Fuck.

"Great. Well, Time, we're on dishes. "

"I thought I was ypur pretty boy."

You feel your face heat up, but you can even care. Why does je have to tease you? Your heart can't take it.

He's so handsome when he's being a menace. Which is a big problem.

Well also the whole he's being a menace thing. That's a bigger problem.

"You're just being mean to (Y/n)," Twilight says helpfully.

"How? I'm just asking why I went from pretty boy to Time."

You just groan, pulling your hands to cover your face.

This is going to be a long day.

Twilight

Why you're left to babysit the stubbornest Links is still beyond you, and yet here you are for the umpteenth time- babysitting them.

Twilight, Warriors, Legend, Wild, and Wind are scattered about the clearing in groups of one or two.

Thankfully, Wild and Wind are on opposite sides of the area and not collaborating to cause trouble.

Unfortunate you hear trouble before you see it.

"Fan out, get low! Pretty boy with me!"

They all turn to look at you as they drop into crouches.

Oh good. You called Twilight pretty boy. And no one knows who you meant. Great.

You groan because that's easier than dealing with feelings.

"You uh, were looking at me when you said- that name.... am- Am I pretty boy?" Twilight asks, and his voice is a little too thick to be played off.

"Yes. Now get over here we don't have much time."

Twilight does, quickly making his way to your side.

He gets there in time to throw a shield over your heads when the arrow start falling. What a gentleman!

When it's all over you can already feel his eyes on you.

"So uh... I'm pretty boy?"

"Yeah, guess you are." You answer him.

"You think I'm pretty?" Twilight asks, and it's both hopeful and heart breaking to hear.

How can he not see that?

"Of course I do. I have eyes." You say, playing off any and all other emotions.

"So... I'm your pretty boy then?"

You just sigh. At least he's having fun. "If you like to be, sure."

Warriors

You actually don't mind going to town to grab supplies, what you fo hate is pickings who goes with you. Sometimes there's no problem, but sometimes the others get pouty if they don't get to go.

Somethings about socialization? Who knows.

But as you're in Warrior's hyrule, he's coming with.

"Alright, pretty boy, let's go." You say as you turn to look at the captain.

Oh, you said that out loud. Shit.

Maybe he missed it?

"What did you just call me?" Warriors asks, and he looks half confused half endeared.

"Uhhhhh-" You blue screen with nearly no idea what's happening.

But you do register embarrassment blooming.

Warriors takes on a smug look as he asks, "You called me pretty boy, right?"

"Yeah. So?" You ask, failing miserably at keeping your cool.

"You think I'm a pretty boy?" He asks, and you swear his ears are tinkered pink.

Why are his ears pink?

Is he- flattered?

"Yeah... You're pretty. You're a boy. Seems pretty straight forwards."

"That's not usually a name I like."

"Oh. Then I'm sorry I called you that."

Warriors shakes his head and gives you a soft look. Earnest and hinging almost on smitten "Actually- I like when you say it."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Well, come on then pretty boy." You say, flashing a smile.

"Lead on, (Y/n)."

He links his arm through yours eaaily.

Wild easily.

You find yourself watching Wild as he crouches and waits patiently for the perfect shot. You've been running low on meat lately and you're out here to aid his hunt.

Does ot usually take so long?

You can't tell.

But you would like to have a break from squatting a little behind him.

"Wild." You whisper just barley audible.

He dosen’t seem to here you.

"Wild."

No answer.

"Link?" You call again.

He stil dosen’t respond.

So you try again, "Pretty boy?" You say, words falling out of yourouth without thought or permission.

He stiffens, head whipping around. "(Y/n)?

"Are we even seeing animals to hunt?" You ask softly.

"No- wait- what?"

"How much longer are we going yo sit here? It's been like two hours."

"Twenty minutes. And did you call me pretty boy?"

"Oh- yeah, I was hoping you wouldn't notice."

"Oh... Why?"

"I was thinking we should move to a better place to hunt?"

"Oh... Okay."

"Any ideas on where?" You ask.

"Uh- maybe a hill.... Why did you call me pretty boy?"

"It just slipped out. I won't call you that again though, promise."

"No... Uh- I like the name.... I just don't think I've been called that before."

You have a harder time believing that. Wild really is pretty, has je eveb seen his own face?

"That's surprising. "

"It is?"

"Yeah. It is."

"Well.... I like the name, at least from you." Wild says again, his ears tinged pink and a barley hidden smile present.

"Yeah? You don't want Legend calling you that?"

"Not really."

"That tracks, pretty boy. Come on let's move to a better vantage point."

"Okay." Wild says, and you swear if he were a hardened hero and traveler, he'd be giggling.

Wind

You don't mind being put on foraging duty, especially not when the sailor is your companion. Wind has always been so fun to be around. The kid is like a brother to you almost.

He's a few feet away, digging through a mess of greenery that seems pretty weird to you, but he seems happy. And thats good.

"Hey, (Y/n)?" Wind asks, turning his eyes to you.

"Yeah, kid?"

"Are these those poisonous berries Wild showed us?"

You squint as you scrutinize the purple berries Wind holds up. They definitely look similar.

"I'm not sure. Better leave them alone to be safe, though."

Wind sighs, "I thought you'd say that."

"Then why even ask, pretty boy?"

You don't know why you said it, but you did, and he's a cute kid. So whatever. It's honest, at least.

"What?"

"What part are you confused about, kiddo?"

"Why did you call me pretty boy? Is that an insult?"

"No, Wind, it's not an insult. Not from me at least."

"Oh. Good!"

You bite back the laugh that bubbles up from your throat, trying not to he overtly rude. His fave is definitely one you'll remember.

Wind looks pleased, and maybe a little embarrassed. But the glee behind his eyes is genuine.

"So, I'm your pretty boy?"

"Sure kid." You say, trying again not to laugh.

He's cute, in that kid way with the too big grin.

"The others are gonna be SO jealous!"

You do laugh this time, warm and bright, and glad to see him happy.

"Be nice, Wind."

"Never!" He calls as he starts foraging again.

#misty writes #linkeduniverse #lu #linked universe x reader #misty answers #amistakehadhappened #lu time #lu wild #lu legend #lu hyrule #lu warriors #lu four #lu sky #lu twilight #lu wind #lu chain #lu chain x reader

331 notes · View notes

morerandombullshit · 6 months

Text

Deserve (Vergil x f!Reader)

Rating: 18+ (MDNI but not like that stopped you guys anyway)

Pairing: Vergil x f!Reader

Summary: You finally left your abusive ex for good over him cheating on you, but it's still weighing on you. Vergil finds out and decides to comfort you in the only way he really knows how to comfort another person.

CW: Cheating, implied abuse, slightly angsty, bit of hurt/comfort, comfort sex (kinda??), unprotected sex (DO NOT TRY AT HOME) oral (f!rieceiving), face-sitting, consent, begging (only if you squint), creampies, slight dom/sub dynamics (or it's not slight idrk), dom Vergil/sub Reader, praise, degradation (just a little sprinkling only if you squint i promise), slight edging (ok maybe not so slight aha), clothes-ripping, semi-monster sex, aftercare pet names used: darling, sweetheart, pretty girl, perfect girl, good girl, my love, mine

Word count: 4573 (i totally didn't get too into this fic, no i didn't)

Note: I don't even fucking know how I came up with this idea (guess I was scrolling through too much DMC Boys x Reader smut and shit but oh well I have zero regrets), but in my notebook it's literally 18 and a quarter pages long and I was up until 2am finishing it off because I couldn't sleep and then I tried to show my best friend my writing at some point but he couldn't read my handwriting and shit (2am writing ftw, I guess)—

Anyways, enjoy this...explosion of smut, because I'm kinda on a little bit of a fluff writing kick/writer's block thing rn and idk when I'm gonna write more soooooo

Also Cameron Grey's I Want It All is basically the vibe for this oneshot, I recommend listening to it on repeat as you read—

Sitting on the couch at Devil May Cry, you force yourself to focus on the magazine print in front of you. It's after hours and everyone's gone home—except for you and Dante's twin, Vergil.

Vergil's cold and intimidating presence makes you feel like a storm is approaching every time he's around. But that body, though...shit. Strong jawline, short and slicked back silvery-white hair, ice blue eyes, cherry lips, toned body, ass like it was sculpted by a fucking ethereal being...Something lights like fire low in the pit of your stomach, and you shift a bit on the couch, still trying to focus on the magazine. Footsteps sound from across the room, and as the familiar scent of storms, fresh-cut grass and sage permeates your senses, that warmth between your thighs transmutes to a light throbbing.

Vergil steps into the room and you drop your eyes to the magazine, deciding it better to ignore that feeling right now. It's always happened whenever he's around—even when you were dating your abusive ex, but you push that thought away and continue hyperfocusing on the page in front of you. You toss your feet up onto an arm of the couch, leaning your head and putting the magazine at a tilted angle in the air.

"Y/N."

You sit up a bit, dropping the magazine. Vergil's always had a cold and imperious vibe around everyone, so you have to admit you're surprised he bothers to know your name. "Shit, didn't notice you." you reply, lying and hoping he doesn't know you are. "What is it?"

He walks a bit closer to you, grabbing a chair—his usual plastic one (he has threatened murder if someone else so much breathes on it before, now that you think about it)—and sitting in it, setting the Yamato against one of its armrests and letting it lean against the white plastic. "What're you doing here so late? I'd have thought you'd be at home right now."

At the mention of home, your stomach churns with nausea—the week before, you'd moved your stuff out of the apartment you had shared with your ex, and you're still trying to find a new place to live. Dante—after you begrudgingly told him why you were looking for a new place to live—said you could stay in Devil May Cry for as long as you need.

Vergil doesn't know, though. But something in you wants to tell him, so you take a breath in and say, "I'm...between homes right now. Dante said I could stay here for as long as I need, and it's a better option than the streets."

"Would you mind if I asked why you're between homes at the moment?" he asks you, and you hear his voice sound less...cold for a moment. "Uh...my abusive ex cheated and I was sharing an apartment with him. Couldn't stand to live there after all the shit he pulled."

Your eyes have been trained to your boots the whole time but you look up, but you look up at Vergil and see the ice blue eyes blazing—a surefire sign he might go Devil Trigger. And for some reason, that makes the throbbing between your thighs more apparent, and harder to ignore. You shift your weight on the couch, trying to do it subtly enough that he doesn't notice—but knowing how shitty your luck is, he does. Vergil raises an eyebrow at you, and you regret all your fucking life decisions. "Something wrong?" he asks.

Oh, nothing. Just the fact that you're somehow turning me the fuck on, you think to yourself before clearing your throat and replying with, "No."

"You're always clearing your throat before you speak a lie." he says, and your brow furrows. His voice imperceptibly softens at the next thing he says. "It's...cute, in a way."

You cough a bit, startled by his sudden statement. "What?"

"It is." Vergil leans forward in his chair, a little closer to the couch you're sitting on. "But I have to wonder...what is wrong?"

You shrug, resisting the urge to clear your throat again. "Wanted to shift my position on the couch—it was getting uncomfortable sitting in one position for that long."

"Hm." he replies, his ice blue eyes boring into yours, making that already noticeable throb between your thighs even more unbearable to hide. A taut tension blankets over the two of you, and your tongue swipes out to lick your lips. Vergil's eyes drop to your lips instantly, and that taut tension becomes even more taut, if that's possible.

You drop your gaze to the ground, but your eyes snag on a growing bulge tightening the black leather of his pants, which causes your mouth to go bone dry, causing you to lick your lips again. As quickly as you had noticed his cock growing harder through his pants, you drop your gaze to its intended destination—the floor—and try to forget you ever saw it.

That taut tension between you and Vergil continues, neither of you talking. His gaze locked on your lips, yours locked on the ground—though seeing how his cock had strained against his pants is at the forefront of your mind, and that throbbing between your thighs becomes mildly painful. It's an effort not to wince, an effort to not press your hands so tightly together you might break a few bones.

"Y/N." Vergil says, his voice a little lower and rougher than before, his breath hitting your ear. When the hell did he move?, you wonder to yourself before realizing, Oh, wait. He's half-demon.

"Yeah." you mutter as a form of response, since your mind's more focused on how close he is to you right now—the distance between your bodies only inches apart, which makes that throbbing between your thighs even worse. "Tell me what's wrong," he murmurs, his breath still hitting your ear as he uses one hand to tilt your chin up towards his face. "And tell me how to make it better."

Other than the fact that you're so turned on you almost can't see straight, something you'd never tell him even if your life depended on it, there's an...emptiness. Having dated your abusive ex for so long before you ended it because you'd found him with his face between the thighs of some girl you didn't recognize has left a bigger toll on you for the past week, more than you care to admit. "I was living with my abusive ex. A week ago, I caught him eating some other girl out, and I decided I wasn't taking the abuse anymore, so..."

Vergil's eyes flash slightly, and for a moment, you think he's going to go Devil Trigger, but he doesn't—only that kernel of demonic power lies in his eyes, a show of his rage. "I will fucking hunt him down and end him. Slowly," he says, voice taking on a slight and low snarling quality in his anger. And you don't know if you've ever heard him curse before, but the throbbing between your thighs intensifies when you hear it. "Did he hurt you?"

It takes you a moment to respond to that, unsure of how to do it for fear of what he's going to do, but you reply with, "Yes."

"He never fucking deserved you." he says matter of factly, his voice still taking on that slight, low snarling quality. "You're better off without him."

"I know." you sigh. "But abusers tend to manipulate their victims. And I hate how I agreed to move in with him a month into our relationship. Should've realized it was of him—"

Your words get cut off when Vergil straight up puts his mouth on yours. The kiss isn't exactly gentle, but there's a comforting quality to it behind all the pure want he's kissing you with. It takes you a second to kiss back, but once you do, you're lost in it. God, the feeling of Vergil's mouth pressing against your has been chasing your dreams for so long now, maybe even you first met him or your first day at Devil May Cry—your mind and body keep wanting more more more as that throbbing between your thighs starts to ache, causing you to let out an unbidden whine into his mouth.

He pulls away again, and you almost whine again, hating the loss of contact as you resist the urge to rub your thighs together. His breath and yours are mingling, both of you panting slightly. "You have no fucking idea how I've wanted to do that." Vergil murmurs, voice rougher than usual. "No fucking idea of the things I want to do to you."

A breathless sound is your only reply, and the hand that isn't gripping your chin falls to your hip, and your back arches slightly as he kneads your skin through your shirt, "Let me touch you," he mumbles, burying his face into your neck and brushing his nose against your skin. "Just—let me touch you. Please."

You're silent for a moment, and Vergil pulls back a tiny bit, making you realize he's letting you decide—letting you decide whether you want to go further or stop and forget this ever happened. He'll keep going only with a confirmation that you want this, and only if it's a yes you're sure about—he doesn't want you to be pressured. You swallow, and you see his eyes flick to the hollow of your throat, tracking the movement. "Okay." you say, pressing a hand to his chest, right above his heart.

No sooner than the word leaves you, Vergil has his mouth right on the side of your neck, his hand dropping from your chin and going to your other hip—both hands kneading through your shirt now. You tilt your head back, a silent plea for him to keep going. A sound emerges from low in his throat—some kind of growl?—and he skims his mouth along your skin to the hollow of your throat, causing a chill of pleasure to go down your spine.

Vergil's mouth presses against the hollow of your throat, his hands still kneading your hips through your shirt, and your back arches into him, his hips settling between your thighs once you do—causing an unbidden whimper to leave your mouth. The feel of his cock, even with the barriers of his pants and yours, makes you see fucking stars. His tongue laves along the hollow of your throat, and you whimper louder this time, your senses narrowed to his tongue moving over your skin. Your head falls back even more, baring pretty much all your neck to him.

"You taste so much better than I ever fucking dreamed you would." Vergil murmurs onto your skin, pulling on it with his teeth. You moan now, your hips uncontrollably grinding against his—eliciting a soft groan from him, and that sound only adds to the throbbing between your thighs and the desire sparking in your blood. He dips his head a bit, nibbling on more skin of your neck, and every singular throb between your thighs feels like fucking torture. Your hands are aching to touch him, aching to feel his bare skin, his mouth, his fingers, his cock...

You tentatively put your hands on Vergil's shoulders, kind of digging your nails in when he drags his teeth on your skin. His hands hook into the bottom hem of your shirt, and your breath hitches. "Can I take this off?" he murmurs against your neck, and you nod. But his hands don't move, leaving you to rub your thighs together in a need for friction and some impatience. "I need to hear you say it, darling. I need you to use your words, okay?"

You take a fractured breath in, forming some words as you fight through the lust fogging your mind right now. "Fuck yes. Please, Vergil. Please." you mumble, so wet you might soak through your pants altogether. "Thank fuck..." he murmurs, moving one hand up to the neckline of your shirt before tugging and ripping the cotton and polyester fabric clean down the middle.

You gasp at the cool air hitting your upper half—now, your bra's the only barrier. Vergil pulls away from your neck, his eyes glazing over as he looks at your bare skin. "So fucking beautiful..." he says as his hands land back onto your hips, kneading your skin. You whine, so turned on it's hard to think of anything else. He dips his head down, teeth grazing one of the edges of your bra.

Your hands go from digging your nails into his shoulders to tangling in his short and slicked back silvery-white hair—it's so fucking soft, and it's thicker than it looks. A low growl rumbles from deep in his throat, and his hands continue to knead into your hips, but hands feel more like claws now. "Please tell me I can keep going." His teeth still graze the edge of your bra.

"Don't—don't stop."

Vergil's head moves a bit to the middle of your bra, and you could've sworn his canines are now fangs as he rips your bra in two with just his teeth. Your breath stutters as your upper half is fully exposed now, the throbbing between your thighs becoming so painful that you whimper a bit. His hands leave your hips and rise to cup your now bare breasts, your breath almost stopping altogether when you see the reverence in his eyes and his body language. You feel like a fucking goddess under his scrutiny, and when his hands creep up a bit, those almost-claws drawing circles on your skin, making you into the touch as lightning bolts of pleasure spread from where he's touching you.

Your hips rolls of their own accord again, a fractured moan slipping from your mouth as you feel his cock growing harder against you. You can't think, can't form words, because of the overwhelming pressure going through you right now. Vergil groans as you do that, his head dipping and his tongue teasingly tracing one of your nipples. And fuck, that feeling...You cry out this time, breath so shallow you off-handedly wonder how the fuck you're getting oxygen.

One of his hands goes from cupping your breast to hooking into the hem of your pants, but you don't focus on that as he flicks his tongue over your nipple again, taking it into his mouth, teeth grazing the slightest bit—

You cry out again, this time mixed in with a moan, and your hips buck into him, whimpering at the way he feels against you, even if there is the barrier of clothes. "That's it, pretty girl." Vergil murmurs against your breast. "It's me who makes you feel like this."

A moan is your only reply. He moves a bit, straddling you slightly, every thought eddying from your mind as he rolls his hips against yours, but unlike when you had done it, it's purposeful.

He's teasing.

Vergil raises his head to whisper into your ear, his lips grazing the shell of it and triggering a needy shudder that wracks your body. "If I were to rip these pants off of you right now, how wet would I find you, sweetheart?"

Fucking soaking.

You can barely decipher his words through your lust-fogged haze, and every part of you is screaming, more, more, more, but you manage to choke out, "Play later."

Your voice is breathless, the need in it so abundantly clear, but you're too lost in the pleasure to notice or even care. Vergil dips his head and kisses the skin beneath your ear, causing another needy shudder. A promise and an unleashing. "I will, perfect girl. I will. But we have a couple other things to take care of, do we not?"

Right. He still has all his clothes on. Slipping your hands from his hair, you put them on either side of his dark gray trench coat with bright turquoise coloring. "Can I take this off?" you ask, surprised at how you can function right now. A nod from Vergil. "Please."

You make quick work of his coat, fabric sighing as it drops to the floor, revealing arms that you never were so fucking toned. Amazed, you run your hands down his arms, the smooth skin and taut muscle feeling so good to touch. You hear his breath hitch and you smirk to yourself. "Y/N." he murmurs, and you know what he means—stop gawking and get to the point before he spontaneously combusts. Taking a breath in, you reply with a quiet "Okay" before unzipping the high neck of his armored black and dark slate gray tank top, revealing his bare chest to you. Just as his coat had, it falls to the floor behind him, the metal making a faint clinking sound.

But you're too focused on greedily inventorying the fucking masterpiece that is Vergil's chest. Abs that look like they've been hewn from stone in a mountain's cliff face, pecs that aren't too big but are still hot as hell...your gaze snags on a thin dusting of white hair that disappears beneath his pants and a very defined V-line that flows beneath his pants like his happy trail does.

The only thing that leaves your mouth is a breathless "Fuck". You reach for the top of his pants, but his hand lightly catches your wrist—those almost-claws tickling your skin. "I want to taste you first." he says, his voice that low, lush growl that makes that throbbing between your thighs even more unbearable. "I want to feel you come on my fingers and tongue."

You swallow as Vergil's other hand—the one hooked into the waistband of your pants—moves down, utilizing those almost-claws and shredding the fabric straight down the middle, like he did with your shirt. His hand lightly brushes the fabric of your panties now, nearly making your heart stop.

"Turn around and spread your legs," he says quietly, his voice still having that growly quality—but also pure dominance. "And hold onto the back of the couch. You'll need it."

Sparks of more arousal rise in your blood as you hasten to do what Vergil tells you, and a satisfied hum from behind you has you knowing you did it right. "Good girl." he says, his hand hooking into the edge of your panties. Your breathing stutters at the praise, and you're sure he smirked at that reaction from you, even if you can't see his face. He doesn't move for a moment before asking, "Do you still want this? Because I don't think I'll be able to stop after—though I'll try my damndest to."

You ponder on it for a moment, the throbbing between your thighs growing as you do, before you reply with a simple, "Yes."

A low growl rumbles in Vergil's throat before you pulls on your panties hard enough to rip them off your frame, and your breath sharpens for a moment. "So fucking beautiful..." he murmurs, nudging your legs just a bit wider with his knee before sliding a finger inside your dripping pussy. Your hands tighten on the back of the couch, your knuckles going white as you bite on your tongue to keep from screaming in pleasure.

Vergil adds a second finger, and your pussy walls clench around him, spasming at the pleasure of being filled as he picks up a pace, starting a sort of rhythm—pumping his fingers in and out, said fingers being knuckle-deep in you. You moan, hips rocking against his hand—

"That's it." he murmurs, his voice still having that low and growly tone to it. "Ride my hand, pretty girl."

And you do, your soft moans permeating the silence broken only by the squelching of his fingers pumping in and out. After an indeterminable amount of time, Vergil's fingers slip out of you, making an obscene sound between squelching and popping—but also eliciting a whine from you. You were so close, and he had to go and do that.

But that feeling of intense, world-shattering pleasure returns when he laps at you, tongue giving you short, teasing licks all the way up to your swollen clit. And when his mouth finds that sweet, sensitive bud between your legs, and sucks on it, your hands are gripping the back of the couch so hard that you might break a couple bones. You let out an involuntary scream, and Vergil's hand gently clamps over your mouth to muffle it.

Then his fingers go back to where they were before, his tongue swirling in a figure eight as he sucks on your overly sensitive clit, and you're so, so fucking close—

But Vergil takes your clit out of his mouth for a moment, making you squirm. "I want you to do something for me," he says, voice hoarse, still having that dominating quality to it. "Sit on my face, darling."

"W—What?" you stutter. While you'd be glad to do what he tells you, you've never...done what he's asking you to do. The hand Vergil had gently clamped over your mouth to muffle your scream drops to your jaw as he says, "Sit on my face, perfect girl. You can't do anything wrong."

You swallow, but his reassurance has you doing as he tells you to do, feeling a little out of your comfort zone, but doing it nonetheless. When Vergil taks your clit back into his mouth and his fingers fill you again, your hands ache and you moan your loudest so far—this position hits far deeper spots than the previous one did, even if it had hit pretty deep.

A few more passes of his tongue and pumping of his fingers has your back arching, grinding against his face as you come, his name on your lips. Vergil laps up every last drop of your orgasm before releasing your clit with a groan and saying, "Your taste is going to drive me fucking insane."

Too winded to even speak, your hands bracing the back of the couch are your only support. Vergil's hands lift your hips slightly—a way of supporting you, you realize—and he presses a soft kiss to your inner thigh before murmuring against your skin, "You did so fucking good, sweetheart."

Your breath skips at the praise, and when your post-orgasmic bliss subsides, you mumble an incoherent reply. You hear a hum of contemplation from him and his hands knead your hips as he silently thinks something over. "Turn around and spread your legs again for me." he says. You obey almost instantly—which should be embarrassing, but you're too turned on to care—and you hear a snarl of approval behind you. Buttons being unbuttoned and zipper being undone sounds from behind you, followed by the whisper of leather dropping and boots clacking onto the floor.

You're instantly wet and throbbing again after thinking about what's going to happen, your juices slicking down your thighs. You feel Vergil's hand grip your ass and squeeze it slightly as he asks, "Ready?"

A nearly incoherent "Please" slips from your mouth, and once it does, his cock slides inside you, all the way to the base. He's bigger—and wider—than you thought he'd be, and he stills, giving you a moment to adjust to him. You breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth.

Now, this isn't your first time having sex, but you haven't done it for a while, and this is Vergil we're talking about here, for fuck's sake. You feel his lips graze along your spine as he murmurs, "You're so fucking tight."

After that comment, he pulls out near to the tip and slides back into the base, which is really easy considering how soaked you are, making a moan leave your mouth. "Mine," he grunts, sounding like he's close to DTing. "My beautiful whore, taking my cock so well."

The praise mixed with degradation should sting, but instead it stokes the flames of your need, and you moan again. "You like this, pretty girl?" Vergil asks as he kisses your spine again, thrusting in and out. "You like when I pound into your sweet little cunt with my cock?"

Another moan, louder this time, is your only reply—more, more, more, until he pumps you full of his cum—

For a few blissful moments, there's only him and his rough thrusts before he stops. Your brow furrows a bit. "Why'd you stop?"

Vergil doesn't say anything, he just grabs your hips and positions the both of you so that he's on his back and you're straddling him, his cock inches away from your entrance. You can see his face now, and has a bit of a self-confident smirk on his mouth. Even if you don't have sex much, you can tell what that means. You sink onto his cock—it's deeper this time, and your moan occurs at the same time as his groan.

His hands knead into your hips as you brace your hands on his muscled chest, moving up and down in a rough rhythm, moaning whenever his cock deeply hits in a sweet spot. You keep going, lost in the pleasure, riding Vergil into oblivion until he lifts his hips and his cock hits a spot that makes you come and sees stars at the same time—you let out a sound between a moan and a scream at the sensation. His orgasm comes right up on the heels of yours, and he lets out a long, low groan as he cums deep inside you, and your inner walls clench, milking it out.

When he pulls out, there's a small whine from you, but you can feel his cum dripping from your pussy, along with the juices from your own orgasm. You sit there on top of him, still dazed from post-orgasmic bliss, taking in air. You off-handedly wonder where your clothes are before remembering Vergil quite literally ripping them off of you earlier.

He seems to have seen something in your face, because he raises his head and kisses the tip of your nose. "You okay?" he asks you, and his checking in brings a small smile to your face. "Yeah...just wondering what I'm gonna do since you ripped all my clothes right off."

Vergil winces a bit. "Sorry, I just...I wanted you so bad that I wasn't thinking straight. I still want you."

"I know," you murmur drowsily. "I do too."

You get off him and let him put his clothes back on, for some reason expecting him to leave you here naked since he'd gotten what he wanted from you. Fabric is draped around your shoulders, and you see Vergil kneel in front of you, fully dressed now, doing seemingly hidden buttons to protect your dignity. He further surprises you by picking you up bridal style as if you weigh nothing. He then presses his mouth to yours—an offer you immediately accept by kissing back—before he pulls away just enough for his mouth to graze yours as he talks. "I'd do anything for you. Kill, steal, lie, cheat...you name it, I'll do it, because you deserve the fucking world, my love."

You smile and reply with, "Same goes for you."

Vergil laughs softly and kisses you again before grabbing the Yamato—mostly forgotten in your guys' frenzy—and holds it one hand as he bridal carries you to his room.

#vergil dmc #vergil smut #dmc smut #i regret nothing #i wrote most of this at 2am forgive my shitty wording #ashs bullshit

80 notes · View notes

dufferpuffer · 3 months

Note

Ok anon from before here, you fully convinced me about lupin and tonks, makes total sense to me now and I love this interpretation! It also make lupin kinda a fuck boy with is pretty funny to me lol

Oh yeah. Remus doesn't sleep around the thought of intimacy terrifies him - but he has always been weak to the whims of others: either people-pleasing or running the fuck away. But he can't run from Tonks. And he doesn't want to. Shes so cool and nice and understanding and fun and gets him, really gets him...

IDK how old you are, I hope 16+ or whatever age of consent is where you are But have you ever like... gotten in a relationship with someone where you can just lose an entire weekend laying in bed with them...? Or a friend where you don't hear from them for days when the BF/GF is over - and you know they aren't doing anything much? Like Ryoji Kaji and Misato Katsuragi (Evangelion) when they were in college. A week of just smoking and snacks and sex. 'Oops I forgot to go to class again today'

That's the framework of Remadora and I don't take otherwise lol Picture this: Remus is weary after a bad Full Moon. Fatigued on a couch, groaning pathetically, wrapped in a blanket, bones hurt... He can't run from Tonks doting on him when she has time off: Fetching water, sprinkling snow on his feverish head semi-playfully. He tells her not to bother, to go do something else... but she is Tonks.

She is sweet and cheeky and charming. She is stubborn and bubbly and gentle... when he is at his worst she always cheers him up. Everything he does is right when its with her: Every joke he makes lands, every story he tells is interesting - she makes him feel like a professional flirt... somehow. How intoxicating it is, to have someone understand you effortlessly, to not have to work to feel accepted... No lies are necessary. No manipulations work. No masks fool.

Of course they end up close. Uncomfortable? Come to bed. She can probably even carry him there. Cold? She can warm him up. Snuggle up. Cut up and bruised? She can do ancient magic: kiss them better. He hurts? Well... there's easy ways to distract from the pain: He doesn't need to do much to be petted and sucked off. To relax.

And god - he feels guilty, as always. She's doing so much for him. So they kiss, they fuck - its easier to have sex when the pain is numbed a little by adrenaline and dopamine and a desire to please. ...And when the emotional high wears off he cries. He is MORE guilty. What has he done...? Has he just made a huge mistake again...? Tonk's doesn't think so - so she cares for him more. Soothes him. But that's how these things start.

Sex until they're both tired and dizzy, until they lay together sore and nap... waking up to chat, to talk about feelings and worries. Tonk's gets up to get him some water and makes herself a 'recreational' potion with her excellent Auror potion skills.

Remus doesn't do that sort of thing, but since she made it he takes a mouthful or two. Reminds him of the old days with his friends. He tells her Peter's was stronger, back in the day. Perhaps an addition of Shrivelfig...? High, giddy, comfortable but sore - they chat about what Hogwarts was like in the 70s, what it was like in the 80s... laugh about Severus as a student and as a teacher... talk about their houses, their common rooms, their friends... the differences between the two wars.

And they have more sex. Over and over. They keep interrupting each-other with affection, with touching and kissing and nakedness. They forget themselves. They forget the world. They aren't Remus Lupin the scarred Werewolf or Nymphadora Tonks the Auror: they are just together. They are their pasts and their present, their thoughts and their feelings and their heat and their sleep. Being together is just as comfortable as being alone... moreso, even.

They don't even notice it's been three whole days since they have had a proper meal. Since anyone else has seen either of them beyond a half-naked dash for a snack. Remus thinks he has been sneaky, that nobody knows. They know. (They just care less than he thinks they will - he thinks they will judge him, but all they wish is that he was quieter or used a silencing spell.) But eventually Rems recovers enough from the Full Moon to be useful again - and Moody needs Tonks to like... work.

The world becomes heavy again. Remus wonders what the hell he was THINKING... pulling a promising Auror from her mentor for so long, wasting her time with him like a couple of layabouts, risking infection - he knows his spit isn't contagious outside of the full moon but it still scares him. No. No no - while he has his health he will go and be as useful as he can - and push her away, till she forgets about him. But it hurts. He is addicted. Every night he curls up and wishes for her body heat with him, soothing his worries, numbing his thoughts... But he is toxic. Perhaps if he died in glory she could move on...

...You know. Like that. Remadora.

#hp #remus lupin #love you remus #remus my beloved #remadora #nymphadora tonks

22 notes · View notes

thesuperiorgenshinaddict · 3 months

Note

can u do smthing with hiori yo and like reader has like abusive or like just toxic or something just wrong with the family and like hiori and reader like get closer cuz they both deal with the same stuff at home (strangers to friends to lovers)? long or short idc accept or ignore idc. Have a good day =)))

AN: ty for the request!! for what reader has going on in their family, i kept it vague cuz i obvs wouldn't want to assume anything, i hope you're doing okay though :> for this specifically, i did this pre-blue lock but feel free to ask for anything different! and more important AN: yeah i pumped reader w/ characterization kinda. like there's an actual plot which kinda makes sense kinda doesn't. ermmmm i might as well say i got slightly sidetracked but that's cringe!!!!!! CRINGE!1!!11 whatev hopw you enjoy... god im a failure

Pairing: Hiori Yo x GN! Reader Warnings: Hiori gunning down zombies in video games idk what else to say, uhhh shitty cliffhangers (less of cliffhangers, more like hillhangers or something)

HCs first:

Hiori's probably reserved at first. Let's just say that the two of you go to the same school or something, because I can't think that he would just randomly approach someone he doesn't at least recognize. I'd reckon that the two of you end up bonding because of coincidences, considering how he pretty much just does school -> home -> gaming and wouldn't go out of his way to talk to someone he doesn't have to talk to.

Coincidences as in being at the same park at the same time, or trying to get the same thing at a store, stuff like that. Honestly, he would probably not talk to you much and would just mind his own business. After he ends up running into you for the millionth time, he'd probably make some polite conversation because it's just getting too awkward. Something like 'Oh, you're from Class yap yapyap, right?' or 'Oh wow the weather's so nice today' (there's a typhoon).

At some point, rather you or him would end up saying something that breaks the awkwardness. Like maybe saying a less than normal joke but it ends up being funny, making a game reference, or shitting on a teacher that you both mutually dislike. From then on, Hiori starts actively hanging out with you.

Those coincidences end up becoming apart of his day to day schedule, morphing it into school -> park -> home -> gaming. He gets out of his house by telling his parents he's going out for a run to ease his nerves or whatever and spends as much time as physically possible away from them. Hiori will occasionally bring a handheld game console and explain game functions while sitting next to you because he still needs to finish the campaign, even if he's outside.

Even though he spends a lot of time with you, the both of you avoid the topic of spending time at each others' house. Hiori takes it as a win, but he still finds your aversion to it a bit off. As much as he tries to think of other things to do besides sitting on the rusted swings and having you watch him as he shoots goals for 2 hours straight, everything else seems redundant. He tried going to a café with you once, but after he saw the protein to calorie ratio of the drinks, he went straight back to semi-enjoying nature.

After a bit of contemplation, he asks for your contact information. He then has to convince you about the beauty of Discord and why it's better then Line messaging and gives you his username. Majority of his messages are 'hru' or 'r u up?' or screenshots of his homework so you can copy it. Or you don't if you're a very awesome cool honest student. Good for you.

Hiori does long calls with you and just plays video games in the background. Although, it's slightly difficult to focus on his voice because his button mashing is insanely loud and because the playing game status has been running for a while (21 days straight).

Now that he acquired the ability to communicate to you from his phone, he is able to actually plan stuff to hang out. As soon as he finishes his football practice, he heads off to see you.

But, of course, all good things must come to an end. Or a pause.

Slinging his tote bag over his shoulder, he opens and closes his mouth like a fish before he starts searching around the park. A bypasser walking their dog turns the other direction as the six foot man crawls around on the playground slide. Despite his usual calmness, his heart races in his chest.

After 7 minutes of just wandering around, it clicks in his brain. Oh. You ghosted him. His shoulders slack and he picks up his bag; now dirtied with mud and woodchips, and he goes back home.

When he greets his parents at the door, his eyes flit to the floor. There's nothing to distract him from this sickening feeling. Hiori goes into his room, shuts the door, and turns on his console. He shoots the zombies until his eyelids start drooping and he falls asleep.

The next morning, he checks his phone from muscle memory. There's no good morning text. The only notification he has is from one of the cheap mobile games he downloaded out of boredom. Every class period, he raises his hand to go to the bathroom, and checks his phone again. Nothing. He goes to football practice and kicks the ball until the back of his heels have friction marks on them. His feet drag him to the park, across the damp ground, and he sits on the rusted swingset for an hour.

You don't come.

He doesn't see you at school. Days feel like years. Then months pass. He doesn't feel that... upset, per say, he just feels hollow. Like if someone was chipping away at his heart with a toothpick, or something. Weird ass analogy.

He still goes to that park everyday. Instead of talking with you, he jogs around the park and waits for you to randomly pop up and tell him 'haha lolz i was just trolling sry 4 ghosting u OwO'.

The brainrot is got so strong that he literally found himself accidentally buying two Yakult drinks, one for himself and one for you. He still religiously checks his phone every hour. With his pent up energy, he gets seventeen more achievements in his shooting game.

At last, the day you come back. It's pouring rain and he's carrying his umbrella. When he lifts his gaze from the ground, he sees that you're at the park. He can't tell if he's mad or happy or confused or what. Hiori's heart races as he hovers his umbrella over your head and he says the most ultra cool uber awesome thing ever that expresses all of his strong emotions about your absence.

"Heya."

The conversation is stiff and Hiori kinda just talks. Not even about how he misses calling you or whatever. He talks about schoolwork, a new game he added to his steam library, and the weather.

He has a whole yapfest in the most polite manner possible.

Then he makes one snide remark about his parents and you actually join in on shitting on parents together and he feels his face heat up at the slightest. He's getting demolished by the rain and all he can think about is 'this is fun.'

It kinda becomes a bit of an inside joke. Hiori finds it funny. His parents' expectations feel a whole lot lighter now. 'Yo-chan, did you do football practice?' and 'Good job! I'm so proud of you for scoring that goal!' feel hilarious. It's like he's on top of the world, laughing maniacally. Whenever he teabags on the guy he successfully guns down in the games he plays (good sportsmanship my ass), he imagines it's his parents taking the L instead.

He makes it his unofficial mission to spend as much time with you out of the house. Aquariums, libraries, theaters, things of that sort. When it starts getting dark outside and you both have to head home, he reminds you that you can always call him.

While he's playing a new game that's more story-based, there's a side romance plot that makes his jaw slack as he realizes. Hiori's been taking you on dates. And he enjoys them. When he goes to sleep that night, he has a dream where he runs away with you into the horizon, away from both of your families and away from his parents' expectations.

It takes him a long time to think of the optimal confession plan. In between practice and football matches, time passes a lot quicker than he would like, and he needs to confess soon. Or else, he'll be swept away and graduate and become a professional football player, where his life will revolve around football and not what shitty movie he should watch with you.

His plans are ruined when he sees that you seem a bit off. Your eyes are a bit redder than usual and your posture is slouched. He ditches the movie and the two of you go to the park and walk. When the sun starts setting, he swallows down his fears of rejection and gently squeezes your hands.

"I- I like ya a lot. Will," He pauses, and he notices that his grip is shaky. "Can I be yer boyfriend?"

boom cliffhanger i'm tweaking the fuck out hope you enjoyed (please tell me you did im so sorry if i fucked up big time) Fic... thing?

Hiori is a perceptive person. Whether it's because he's gotten used to making note of things while on the field or just programmed into his nature, he doesn't know. For the most part, it's not something he cares much about. The things he notices are buried to the back of his mind. It's mainly unimportant things that he ends up noticing; the gossip that the kids sitting in front of him are very unsubtly whispering about or whatever TV show everyone's watching; none of which he cares about.

It had rained despite the what the forecast had said, and afterschool football practice was canceled. The students who were unlucky enough to not have an umbrella had speedily biked away, trying not to get drenched by the rain. The lucky ones strolled around and talked about going to karaoke. Although his peers' clothes were drenched and a few of them had slipped in puddles, even under the safety of his umbrella, Hiori didn't feel particularly lucky. "Yo-chan, we saved up and bought you this nice umbrella!" His free hand reaches up and runs over the smooth material of the handle. 'That's right,' Hiori thought bitterly. 'If I catch a cold, I can't play football at my full potential.'

Keeping his gaze focused on the ground, he walks and all he can hear is the sound of the rain. The sleeves of his uniform get a bit wet. His legs move on autopilot and before he processes it, he's at the same park that his parents used to bring him to. He avoids the mini football field like the plague and goes to the playground.

It's empty. The rain must have drove everyone away. The first time he sees you, you're sitting on the swingset by yourself. Hiori momentarily thinks about how he's seen you in school before, but he minds his own business. He drowns out the sound of the rain and the creaking of the swings and puts his headphones on. He blasts death metal to avoid his thoughts. For some reason, his so called 'perception' is giving him a weird, murky feeling about you.

He chalks it up to be another football skill and doesn't think about it for the next month.

The next time he thinks about his perception is when he's on a call with you. He explains game mechanics while sharing his screen. "This one has higher health, but lower defense. It's better to shoot it from a distance, it only takes a few shots if ya have good gear," He rapidly clicks a few buttons and does a triple kill combo.

You're adding to the conversation, so it's not just him talking, but he still feels just a bit off. "This one runs fast. It's better to kill it off quickly than worry about it later." With a wry smile, the zombie dies. "This is currently the most meta weapon. Ya can get it from the battlepass. It has a lot of ammo, quick to reload, and has better than average range. The best part about it though is its fast shooting and aim function."

His eyes flutter shut before he mentally prepares himself to ask if you're okay. and boom cliffhanger because me big tired AN: uhhhhhhhhhhhh what was i gonna say i forgot okie toodles :3

#blue lock #blue lock x reader #hiori yo #bllk #bllk x reader #hiori x reader #hiori yo x reader #i heart skibidi toilet

35 notes · View notes

floralcrematorium · 1 month

Text

fuck it, band AU time

with my mounting zine deadlines and drawings i owe friends for their b-days, idk if i'll ever get to draw the accompanying material i wanted to, so it is time to yap everyone's ear off. apologies if this is a mess! it's been a hot minute since i've properly spewed my nonsense out loud

i think i wanna talk abt Nat first... I love using Natalya in narrative works -- she's so so interesting to me and the character i've fleshed out the most

in Band AU, Natalya is a solo pop musician whose earlier music takes heavy inspiration from ethereal wave and dark cabaret. artists who frequent the playlist i've made for her are birdeatsbaby, revue noir, and then a bit of the dresden dolls and mirabilis. here's a hyperlink to her WIP playlist!

as for subject matter, her music probably deals a lot with existentialism and self identity

at the start of her career, Nat is very experimental in her sound, presentation, and image. i like to think she sees her music videos and stage performances as a version of semi-abstract performance art. she's very into symbolism

the pop part of her sound comes a bit later, after she starts dating Alfred Jones, the front man of Multifacet, an alternative(?) rock band (gonna be real, i have NOT nailed down what their sound is yet). her relationship with Alfred is mutually unhealthy - they are somewhat codependent and both feel a need to perform due to media pressure. he's using her for her preexisting fame, she uses him to feel the lonely void she feels

Nat cracks under the pressure. She was a very popular artist before dating Alfred, but she had control. When they start dating, her own achievements begin to be overshadowed. Her career becomes inescapably intertwined with Alfred's. She hits an absolute breaking point

as of right now, the sound of nat's music when she's with alfred is a bit like rina sawayama's. i find her voice gorgeous and i like the sound of urgency in the songs I have added to Nat's playlist -- it's a stark difference from her earlier slower music. I think Frankenstein embodies Nat at this point in her career the best

i know billie eilish is WAY too mainstream for Nat's taste, but I can't help but think of The Diner from billie's latest album for the AmeBel breakup...

also I much prefer platonic AmeBel - I think when in a romantic relationship, these two enable the worse parts of one another. however as just friends, they work quite well! anyway the best way I can sum up how I see AmeBel is:

someone else: what do you even see in him? Nat: he makes me laugh. he's stupid. i like that in a man.

I think the constant theme for Nat is a constant searching for a sense of identity because she continually destroys the identity she's built. I think Nat is a little insecure and to truly flourish, she needs to find some confidence. she also needs a good support system, which comes in the form of Tereza (miss Czechia), but I'll talk about them at a different time (wink wink, nudge nudge)

If I have to give you examples of Nat's different "Eras":

Debut: The Silent, The Tragic Tantrum She's having fun. Nat's a bit cryptic, she's eclectic, and enjoys putting on a show on stage. Start of the AU: Girl Anachronism, The Dresden Dolls I associate Girl Anachronism a lot with Nat in general, band AU aside Dating Alfred: Frankenstein, Rina Sawayama The lyrics of this one really hit for Nat. "All I want is to feel beautiful inside and out/You're the one who can save me from myself." This is when AmeBela are mutually codependent Breakup: Nothing Lasts, Glycerine I don't have anything to add other than this is an old personal favorite of mine. That's it. Breakup, but with plot relevance: The Diner, Billie Eilish I really want to use the lines "I'll go back to the diner/I'll write another letter/I hope you'll read it this time/You better" Nat and Al are having a very public breakup, that's all I have to say Healing: Seventeen, birdeatsbaby Nat's like. 27 at the start of this AU, but I think the themes are still relevant. I also LOVE the dramatic and grandiose intro to the song -- I feel like it's a return to form for her... Healing Nat Part Two: I Always Hang Myself With The Same Rope, birdeatsbaby

Nat will get a happy ending. I do need to figure out in more detail in what ways she damages Alfred, but I think with the general theme of the whole AU being a cautionary tale about fame and the effects it has on an individual, I've focused more on the "good ending" route with Nat's story. She has a moment of self realization and puts in the time to work on herself.

#i got very eepy halfway through so i apologize if this is incoherent #i also just don't think anymore so this is simply what we are working with #hetalia #hws belarus #floralcrematorium band au #band au #hetalia band au #hws america #amebel

14 notes · View notes

shiraishi--kanade · 3 months

Note

Disappeared for rehearsal but your anger is totally justified and honestly as a wxs fan I am so so disappointed in the ones who start hating on vbs for this and completely misinterpreting all this and callig it useless for no other reason other than spite. Grow up oh my god.

Ofc i also was excited for limited tsks5 (but moreso for the possibility for long haired rui bc samurai-ish set?) but it's not like. The end of the world. Idk i just feel like this is such childish behaviour and you, especially as a vbs oshi, deserve to be mad bc honestly. The twitter community is so tiring. Prsk twt fandom stop idolising n25 and wxs and acting like everything else is a problem and bad and not worth it challenge absolute fail!!!!

And you're def also a big reason i grew to understand and love vbs more and always talk with sense and u know a lot of things so if you were excited and this is making u mad than it must even worse so I'm so sorry. Pls be sure to take time to yourself if you need it to not interact with anyone who's acting Like That bc your enjoyment is the most important!!

I'm excited tho!! I do need to catch up on vbs stories yo understand all of this better, bc i have an idea but not like. A clear one. And this definitely is a very good motivation because !!!!! THIS IS SO BIG!!!

Oh trust me, I was excited for Tsukasa5 being limited as well (multiple reasons, aside from what you've said: while I understand the reasoning behind this set being lim, I genuinely wish it wasn't because it'll likely lock side stories and generally nice story moments from some players forever which is unfair, and I don't think shouldn't have been lim in the same way Canary event or Our Happy Ending or Saying Goodbye to My persona weren't; I'm also pissed off by, as I already said, VERY BAD TERRIBLE NO GOOD precedent for the greedy and unfair gacha this banner sets up). It's majorly messed up from Sega's part to do that with him, but it's not because they hate WxS as characters or something, it's because they know they can put a limited event, a WLE (semi-limited) and then a fan-favourite unlimited banner and still get profit from all of it, possibly more than they would if the distribution was better. It's not them hating WxS fans (if anything, VBS fans are more screwed), it's just corporate greed that we need to stop personifying.

I guess I'm just majorly disappointed, more even in the VBS fans being... Like this than the outside reaction. VBS have always been a running joke withing the fandom let's be honest, not a lot of people take them and their (very interesting) themes seriously at all (which is partially why LUtF had so much backlash for suddenly getting serious as if VBS weren't already that). Others' reaction to The Event was always something that I could predict, the amplification of it by the malicious planning is unfortunate but understandable. It's the in-fandom panic and the discovery that people who claim to be fans genuinely do not read the events, do not read the events' synopsis, the events' short summaries and then proceed to have insane takes and spread them as truth that got me upset the most I think lol.

That said my rage is amplified a lot here, mostly for laughs. I am majorly annoyed and miffed because I was expecting at least the VBS fans to be hyped and excited so we could all celebrate, but oh well. Forgot I have different definition of "a fan of a unit" than 90% of the fandom. I still know a lot of people who are on the same wavelength as me and we can get hyped together though, so like I said, it doesn't upset me too much, just makes me want to whack some people with a comically oversized hammer. I'll be just fine.

Thanks though! :D

Edit: hope you had fun at the rehearsal by the way!

#jay rambles.txt #jay gets asks.txt #jay pjsk critical.txt

8 notes · View notes

phlurrii · 1 year

Note

I know a lot of us are sus of Circe and as much as I love and adore her I do think she is bait

My currently theory and hope is that she doesn't realise she's bait and isn't doing it intentionally, she might have been sent to a more research area of team rocket than lil twoeys alterations lab area as while her state is tampered with she's still like pure mew while twoey has had other dna spliced into him, I suppose it makes sense one for studying the pure if altered genetic strain and one for further alterations perhaps enhancements depending on the dna added into twoey

You've mentioned she only knows as much as her human people and if they're just more of a research leaning group then they of course wouldn't really be told much just told to study Circe and her growth and abilities until she's been sufficiently studied enough and put into a job or used for further experimentation using her dna to make MORE mewtwo potentially planned to use the information collected from the twoey experiment to splice and enhance Circes offspring of course with no twoey that research isn't available.

The higher ups who know about Meau from like security tapes I assume because how else do they know what Meau did saving mew and twoey likely know the genetic connection and assume Meau will come for her extra grandchild and maybe told the research devision bits and pieces so that it would be repeated so Circe would realise there's others out there and reach out for help.

Maybe the research devision kind of pressured Circe to do it hence Circe desperate language is Circe is being manipulated and made to manipulate twoey to get Meau as desperation increases emotional driven responses rather than logical ya know it'd push twoey to have to tell Meau and then subsequently Meau to act to get her other grandchild as clearly they're distressed. It might be that the research devision has pure intent and wants to purely study Meau out of fascination but seeing as they're likely connected to team rocket it wouldn't end well with other areas trying to capture and detain Meau for experimentation and control no doubt.

If they are semi innocent just perhaps manipulating cohersing Circe to bring Meau to them it might play into that animation of Meau telling a human they will never hurt her again. A human researcher tries to tell her they just want to study and understand her and they never intended any harm for her. And it just brings back memories of the people who didn't act and didn't want harm to come to her and yet still stood by. "You never intended to harm me?" and yet look at what you've done to my family. You didn't hurt her physically but you've hurt what she cares about which is worse. She was alone too long to have everything taken from her ya know? Deranged feral Meau moment plz my beloved

Idk these are my thoughts and rambles about it I think Circe is innocent but still bait or being cohersed and maybe knows it but like what else can she do really? I'm just hoping she isn't intentionally doing it but then again if she doesn't know Meau is her grandmother... Might be misplaced spite of why did you save them but not ME?! Why was my mother and that two worth saving?! Idk hm thoughts and rambles lmao. The braincells be going this morning

Eheheh,,, there’s a lot of thought in this, I will say this theory right here is the one to pay attention too. Can’t which part, but it’s definitely something to watch ;3

Also dw we will be getting a very liberating deranged Meau moment for this arcs animatic XD

#ask #Circe

27 notes · View notes

sminiac · 7 months

Note

its me 🦭 anon again!! i absolutely love what you wrote for my request oh my godd, especially keeho's. i can't stop thinking about how teasing he'd be now that you've talked about it, and the way his grip would be so tight tryna keep your legs apart😮‍💨i might babble on too much rn but the thought of cumming hard over his tongue already yet he doesn't even pull away at all. i got a feel he'd wanna overstimulate you further and suck even harder just to make you writhe beneath him. just bc he thinks you're so adorable when you can't push him away bc he's holding you down😵‍💫😵‍💫 he's just mumbling some excuse about how he wants to lick you clean of your release that's why he isn't done yet, . ..also feel like he really gets off on the way you're trying your best to keep your noises down so yall don't get caught, he loves seeing you so helplessly pleasured, knowing he's driving you so crazyy

jiung too🫣 the way you wrote for him seems so romantic i love it a lottt, imagine being spoiled by him fr. i absolutely love dedicated guys aagh. oh and morning head w him means a soft session of him eating you out so so cute, especially when he feels you tug lightly on his hair still so messy just from waking up yk. he's obsessed w ur moans bc he loves ur voice from when you've just woken up too🫠🫠i need a jiung rn

...actually im gonna admit im just a baby p1ece, i became a fan because i really can't stop listening to their new song , "killin it":''') i was wondering if you have any recommendations for like shows/series i could watch of piwon to get to know them better? like weekly reality shows of them if they have any, idk where to start :(

GIRL PLEASE. IF ANYTHING BABBLE MORE 🗣️

Overstim w Keeho? I’m actually so ???? The way he literally would try to come up with some fleeting excuse so he can keep himself nestled between your legs, it wouldn’t even completely make sense but you relent because he just looks so pretty and the slackness of your legs jolting with every suck of his lips followed by his tongue feels so good.

No shame in being new to piwon! None at all, just means you’re someone else who I can share my thoughts with :b

I think their ‘PLOG’ playlist would help with remembering their names and faces quite well, their voices too, just so they’re more distinct from each other, and so you can get a better feel of their personalities because it’s mainly the boys yapping, the videos are fairly short if you have a smaller attention span :b

I’d recommend watching their vlogs too! For example ‘P1HARMONY in WORLD’ on YouTube is really comforting and fun, especially so you can get a semi-familiarness with them outside of the more traditional curated section of their life, if that makes sense! Just because personally I love the rawness of the members just whipping out a camera and being silly without bright hot lights in their faces and a general wave they have to follow. ‘HARMONY CLIP’ is also a really good playlist, there’s a lot of comfort videos in there for me, it mainly consists of vlogs from their tours, bts of their mv’s, all that fun stuff, kind of similar to in world.

‘피원모하니’ playlist has all the professionally produced videos, ex: (SAESSAK HARMONY, HARMONY FOREST, LEGENDARY MOVE, HARMONY ADVENTURE) which I’m pretty sure consists of mini games and such? I myself haven’t even made it through all the videos :,)

Ahhh also their practice videos are really entertaining to watch, if you’re wanting to get into some of their more ‘dated’ discography! ‘BFF choreography video’ and ‘BIGBANG Dance practice kcon 2023’ are my favs!

I hope I’m of some help, and don’t worry about watching every single video they’ve ever released because there’s so many and it can seem overwhelming! Have fun <3

#🦭 anon #★ sai yaps ᵎᵎ

13 notes · View notes

mindblownie2 · 9 months

Note

1, 10, and 15 for the ask meme...... IF THEY HAVEN'T BEEN ASKED YET.....

haha you're the first one so.

what is thanatica?

well, as you said - it's a concept. it's a child's idea of how stuff works (because of course it is), but also a representation of an idea. Daniil is the controversial groundbreaking scientist from the big city, so he has his..lab..thing; the backstory I think is very much meant to be... "archetypal" in a way, rather than specific.

that being said, I have been for months poking at a prequel fic so I do have some more... grounded headcanons. so in that universe, existing for purposes of writing out an actual plot as opposed to purposes of analysing the game purely theoretically, well. it is a disused laboratory space that Daniil talked the university administration into giving to him, with the backing of one of his teachers; it is, then, briefly, something with the ambitions and prospects of becoming an entire department, or maybe even an institution unto itself, but that never quite came to pass. it's kinda funny because sometimes the way Daniil talks about it sounds like a whole research institute he established, which given his age and degree, I'm 🤨 doubtful; but then again of course, as per my first point, it doesn't need to make sense in real world terms. but in the grounded universe, I'm gonna say it was a small semi-independent research group in an almost perpetual state of struggling for its own viability, but Daniil is at a certain point reflexively making it sound grander to convince himself and everyone else that this is really something. he's not lying, he just really believes in himself, god bless him.

10. any idea what will happen to them in the bachelor route?

god, I don't know. mainly just keeping my fingers crossed they'll get fleshed out nicely, and hoping for some good conversations; loved talking to the Stamatins in classic but in p2 their dialogue was kinda meh, but hoping that's just because they weren't relevant enough to Artemy's journey. but idk, I've made no secret of the fact that patho classic and the characters as they appear there are very dear to me and I'm very attached to them and the prospect of a new version scares me a little because p2 was an extremely mixed bag for me, doing some things I really liked, some I was neutral to, and quite a few I really disliked, so. I wanna trust IPL but I do not entirely, and prefer not to make any theories or wishlists.

15. pick a barnett newman painting for each of them

your choices were very good & I needed to go in a completely different direction to not feel like I'm copying you, so, from the page you linked:

Daniil: whatever it was meant to be, it's fraying at the edges and hollow in the middle. or it's a door; you choose. or maybe it just reminded me of his coat.

Andrey: it is chaotic, disruptive, a show of contrasting the other ones; a sort of purposeful playing into that expectation. or maybe it just reminded me of his necklaces.

Peter: it is the picture of an obsession: a single vector, emitting both light and dark. or maybe I was just influenced by your choice.

Farkhad: in some ways similar to both, all in all different. unsettled, off-kilter; a discordant note.

(the questions)

#the goblin talks #pathologic #daniil dankovsky #peter stamatin #andrey stamatin #farkhad

9 notes · View notes

beautifullyrainingflower · 1 year

Text

gotg rant (slight gotg3 spoilers)

Am I the only one who finds it kinda wierd that we never semi-explored the grief the other guardians felt when Gamora died? (besides Peter, Groot and Nebula)

In Endgame, we get Rocket telling Thor this whole speech of how he lost the only family he never had. He mentions Drax, Groot, Peter and Mantis yet doesn’t mention Gamora.

And sure, it makes sense because unlike the other 4, he can’t get Gamora back, but idk maybe he could’ve related his personal expiriences with permanent loss to Thor and how it’s useless to try and stop those losses.

Or idk...maybe when Nebula came back, Rocket most likely asumed at that time that Gamora died from the snap too, so I would have liked to see Rocket’s reaction as well as Nebula’s change of demeanor when she broke the news to him about it.

Drax developed a familiar bond with Gamora, at first he literally was set on killing her and hated her for the relation to Thanos, but his views on her changed and she became someone he trust as well as someone he calls family.

So seeing him in gotg3 somewhat jokingly saying how Gamora is dead to him and the rest of the guardians was sorta wierd to me?

As for Mantis, I can see her being the least affected by the loss considering she knew Gamora the least so I don’t complain to much there.

But overall, I hope im not the only one who found it wierd how no one else but Peter, Nebula and Groot were phased by Gamora’s return whatsoever and saw it as a everyday occurence.

Like she loved them so much and everyone considered each other family when they were alive...idk its strange.

#gotg #gotgvol3 #gotg spoilers #gamora #peter quill #rocket raccoon #groot #mantis #nebula #marvel #stupid rant

25 notes · View notes

sapphosdickandballs · 2 months

Note

soooooo- before i forget... i diddddd finish something to talk about.

honestly- i kinda did like it?? a lot more than "mistakes were made" which was the other book id read by this same author. i dont think its anything special tbh and the characters werent super compelling or memorable just in the sense that it felt like they didnt have a lifespan outside of the book. i wasnt really expecting much- and at first i was sooo bored. i wanted to drop it bad cause 😩 augh was just thinking "yeah but what is all this for??????" because it felt like the plot was being slow asf. and then BOOM. the accidental kiss. which- was sort of a turning point and made me get semi invested. the asthma attack too- ooo damn. it did kinda irk me that jo kept asking about her having her inhaler 😭. but like- man emma really got on my mf nerves. i absolutely hated her for a good chunk of time. like- THE FACT THAT the both of them were doing everything possible to not talk and communicate and instead emma had that stupid internal turmoil and became infuriating to read. i was soooooo mentally yelling at her. like girl. how are you going to be all dramatic and yet not communicate your feelings like how else is she supposed to know!!!! the harassment part was a whole trip. idk i just got super annoyed at the first part when they were actively avoiding properly solving their issues CAUSE DAMN they had a bunch of them.

THE ALMOST kiss after jo's dad had me actually on the edge of my seat cause holyyyyy crap. idk and then the business trip happened and emma came to terms with her feelings and they kissed-

I LITERALLY knew it was phil. LITERALLY LIKE it was so obvious when he made that comment in the interview. i deadass put two and two together.

i liked the ending part after theyd realized their feelings tbh. it just like wrapped up good. idk abt the smut part- kinda was underwhelming but it wasn't bad. i think it was an alright read. idk if id recommend it personally just because for me personally- i dont want someone to pick that as a recommendation from me over something like ols. for ME personally its not "the best" its not bad and i did have an alright time with it, but i wouldn't read it again tbh. its was definitely better from her other book but even jo feels like a carbon copy of erin from mistakes were made. she was in her 40s and rich so like is this woman just wanting to write about milf women or something??? age gap?? idk. i just noticed that lol.

im glad i stuck it out but i did feel it drug a little bit throughout. emma- i... i literally cant. she is... ugh. i dont think i liked her character 💅. jo was neat but i just- ughhh they feel so... fictional. not realistic in the way they react or narrate, especially in the internal dialog. i liked avery!!! she was awesome. hmmm... idk.... it was nice. sorry if it seems like im talking in circles and seeming like i disliked it- I DIDNT DISLIKE IT. only some parts of it i disliked. just the author's execution for some parts.

just because as someone whos done a lot of research on writing i pick up details on things and have nitpicks about how things are delivered. i notice stuff.

anygayyyy is that enough yapping???? i dunno what else to sayyyy 😐. u should probably make an asks tag for me atp with how much im yapping in ur inbox ffs.

This is hard to answer lmao. I’m glad you kinda enjoyed it? I’m sorry it wasn’t your favorite? It wasn’t my favorite of all my recs (you should read some girls do. at some point, no pressure. But that is one of my favorites) but I did like it enough to rec. I appreciatep you coming and yapping to me even if you didn’t like the book and I hope that doesn’t make you wary of my recs from now on lmao. Also I made you a tag 👍

#sapphoanswers #Cramity Rambles

2 notes · View notes

compacflt · 2 years

Note

okay so something I love in what you've written is the running thematic element of how the "lack" of a character is treated as its own entity/character, not only with Goose--how he’s the “center of the universe” as you say--but also with Sarah. Idk if I just focused hard on Ice’s childhood/adolescence the entire time reading because I’m obsessed with how you wrote him, but the way there were bits and pieces thrown in about her as the story unfolded (Tom's pot-smoking era, the way they grew up so different but had a similar childhood, the unreturned letters and phone calls--also, Ice seeing Chorus Line on Broadway alone was so silly I loved it. Iceman Kazansky: pilot by day, musical theater fan by night. why was he so interested in fucking Chorus Line of all musicals.) but she never actually made an in-the-flesh appearance makes the entire fic, and Ice’s characterization, so dynamic and moving. Like Ice didn’t grow up as a sad little kid with no siblings and some evil overbearing Admiral father that turned him into a Navy-regulated cog in the machine; he had a sister (and grandmother?? A hipster Woodstock grandma?) who loved or at least cared for him a long long time ago, and her presence left a very visible mark (both emotionally and career-wise) on him no matter how “ice cold” he made himself. And in the very very beginning of WWGATTAI, he and Mav were bro-talking about their families and Ice was all like “grr I might as well not have a sister” because he’s secretly Popeye he was grouchy and young and Sarah had stopped talking to him, but then 9/11 happened and he kept trying to get in touch with her just to make sure she’s okay, and then they finally get to talk at the end of Debriefing and it's like...he's reached the top and he's become the person he's always wanted to become, but he's still the exact same. He wants his sister. He's “The Iceman" and can probably run the Navy on his own, but he’s also just someone’s little brother that used to smoke pot with all the other California hippies. He misses her but he can't talk about it.

Also, you didn't just shoehorn her into the story as a character that would be the Tom Kazansky Version of Carole-and-Goose (or as Ice's wife LMAO) and I loved how you gave her personal depth and a purpose/life outside the story while still adding to Ice's characterization through giving him another person to (a) care too much about and (b) shove into his closet of skeletons because the relationship he has with them is breaking some sort of federal regulation. I hope this all makes sense hahaha, but anyway I loved Sarah and how you treated her. It was so entertaining/heartbreaking to watch Ice wrestle with how the main three people he loves are his communist sister, a male romantic partner who is also a subordinate he bails out of sticky situations constantly, and the son of the man he was involved in the death of. crazy stuff.

ok this is so funny & I love this so much because… it wasn't really how I was thinking about it at the time & I'm so glad it comes across as much warmer than how I originally wrote it... okay like i could explain everything but muh “death of the author”…… eh fuck it okay. I’ll put it under a cut so you can choose not to watch me auto-fellate. another long post, sorry.

so, on Sarah.

I should start this post by saying straight off the bat that she’s literally just a self-insert for me, the author, as a leftist who lives in New York and would not give someone like Tom the time of day, so I could feel better morally/ethically about writing Top Gun fanfiction. So, there’s that. But she (just like everyone else in this fic) is just a tool to get across information about Ice and the story as a whole, and there’s a reason she was introduced in chapter one (two if you’re reading on AO3 i guess. no prologue, wtf is up with that AO3 you guys need to fix that). I wanted to convey a shitload of information at the start, especially because I was posting semi-weekly and wanted people to know what they were getting into because it’s a slow burn.

To summarize what happens in chapter one:

Goose is dead.

Ice and Maverick kill some MiGskyites in addition to killing Goose and it cements some weird fucked-up hyperinterdependent relationship between them.

No, this does not make them instantly friends. They are still fundamentally different people who dislike each other’s outlook on life.

Ice kills some more Soviets and becomes Maverick’s equal, though still not in rank/honor.

Ice writes to his sister Sarah, who doesn’t answer.

Ice hooks up with a girl, but finds that he can’t relate to her as much as he did before the experience of TOPGUN. Also, he can’t relate to women at all.

Ice tries to visit Sarah, and is rejected.

Ice sees A Chorus Line on Broadway by himself.

Ice and Maverick talk to each other as semi-equals, and Ice explains that his sister is a Commie who will never talk to him again. He also explains that he wants to get to the top because he thinks it will make him a good man, or that he can make the Navy better because he himself is a good man. Maverick says, yeah right bozo.

So we’re 5,000 words into a 90,000-word fic and already you know the following:

This entire story and everyone in it revolves around Goose’s death and who gets the blame for Goose’s death.

Ice and Mav are brought together not because they like each other, but because the experience of killing both their friend and their enemies has made it impossible for anyone else on Earth to understand them to that same extent. From the first word, they're already both so fucked-up it really is each other or nobody.

This is gonna be a sloooow burn.

Ice and Mav might end up as superior and subordinate, but they are fundamentally equal ("you can be my wingman anytime/bullshit you can be mine"), and start out as equals. They are now directly responsible for the same amount of death.

Sarah is Ice’s sister, so Ice is definitely not getting married to a woman in this fic. Good news for everyone scared by the slow burn.

Ice had previously had fun with women, and still wants to marry a woman because it "follows all the rules," but after meeting Maverick/the whole TOPGUN experience he finds them annoying/unrelatable. He can’t relate to women at all and doesn't believe this woman when she tells him she loves him because he himself has never been in love with a woman. He is gay.

Ice sees A Chorus Line on Broadway by himself. He is gay.

Sarah will not be in this fic, and Ice is a categorically lonely man who is isolated from anyone who could possibly help him talk about how he feels.

Sarah is a Communist who rejected her military brother, not the other way around, so this is a leftist fic from a leftist perspective, but about conservative men whose conservative personal and political opinions will be repeatedly challenged by the end. This is not a pro-Navy story.

As a corollary to that, the ship for Ice to “be a good man” has already sailed. He’s gonna try his best to be a good man—emphasis on man—throughout the story, but he’s already failed from the very first line.

And Ice steadfastly and stubbornly refuses to be honest with us or himself about how he feels about any of the above.

So you basically have everything you need to understand the rest of the story. Now you (reader) and I (author) can meet each other in the middle on equal terms, and the real story can actually finally get started in the next chapter. It’s a lot of information. Which is why it’s not written very well and the pacing is fucked.

But yeah I just used “Sarah” as an expository tool to help first-time readers understand the political lens of this fic from the get-go, so we don’t have to have a lot of hand-wringing when Ice becomes a war hero of the Persian Gulf War or anything like that (though in my a/n for chapter 5 i did admittedly do some hand-wringing. i gotta delete those a/ns). So, Sarah becomes kind of a weak stand-in for Ice’s political guilt. She’s only mentioned four times besides chapter one, i think—once when Ice is with “Laura” (he is still incredibly guilty about all the people he killed & feels like he let “Sarah” down); once with 9/11 (he still thinks about “Sarah” often enough that she’s the first thing he thinks of when the country has been attacked [still haven't decided if this is the real Sarah though]); once when he’s getting high with Maverick (he is constantly reminded by the brass of the ways in which he is not a good man); and once at the end of “Debriefing,” where they actually get to talk to each other—because he has finally “snapped out of it” and left the Navy.

This fic wasn’t meant to be my sorta-kinda-but-not-really-anti-military soapbox preaching, though, which is why Sarah’s hardly in it at all. It’s a D-plot. Maybe even an E-plot. All in service of the Icemav A-plot. That end scene has a couple different purposes, actually. The second is that Sarah, who at this point is pretty much just a stranger, becomes a receptacle for Ice to prove that he can finally be honest with himself and others about his relationship with Maverick. And…that’s pretty much it. I did do more with her in my Slider one-shot but i honestly dk if that’s getting posted at this point (ITS ROUGH) so im not gonna talk about it now.

But—that was all Sarah as a symbol, which is very un-fun. Sarah as a character is kind of a blank slate, but how Ice thinks about her/misses her is not, as you said :) I’m wary of posting headcanons that are dependent on my fic, though I do have many, because I feel like that’s not really the point of headcanons… “compacflt!Ice-specific headcanons…” idk that seems a little self-aggrandizing even for me. But, yeah, I guess I would characterize my Ice’s childhood as not greeeaaat, because his dad apparently died in Vietnam when he was like eight and his mom apparently died in a car crash when he was twelve (which is why he’s such a good driver [ch 8 notwithstanding DO NOT DRIVE 120 ON I-5]), but also not, like, abusive or anything. Raised by his grandmother (in the Slider one-shot, which I might as well spoil for you since I’m feeling quite hopeless about it, Slider kinda helps Ice deal with her death in the second year they’re at the Academy together, and it’s how their friendship really starts) who might have been hippy-ish and encouraged him breaking the rules, but also he & his sister were very very impacted by the death of their father at war. This is getting kind of deep into it, and I’m just kinda making it up, but I think there was probably a lot of strife between him and Sarah when he was gearing up to go to the Academy/getting his recommendations etc., like actual arguments and screaming matches—yes, she’s disappointed in him, but more than anything she wants to keep him safe so he doesn’t die like their dad (relevant for ice/rooster later)—and he ended up losing her, so it made a deep, deep impression on how he handles (avoids) confrontation about serious stuff like this when he knows he's gonna lose… my ice has a confrontation issue, obviously. but so does canon. see him "apologizing" to maverick for goose's death in the movie for another example of this. bro is struggling.

But thats just me makin shit up so whatever.

But that’s me just makin shit up so whatever.

#it is semi-unfortunate that any character who is not ice in any of my fics #is just a tool for ice’s development lol #i literally was so delightedly confused when someone told me juno was their favorite OC #i was like ? she was just a way to show ice does have respect for other ‘minorities’ in the navy just not himself #ice is straight-up libcoded im sorry #normie median Biden voter ice #but yeah it’s not a very empathetic way to write #the whole rooster one-shot was written because i felt so horrible about how i treated rooster in my fics #bc he really is such a tragic figure in the story #you know how i compared ice/rooster to abraham/isaac?#that’s because i realized I was like this story's god asking abraham to sacrifice his son for his own character development #i still feel awful about it #anyway thank you so so much for the lovely lovely ask I love talking about this stuff #edts notes #asks #tom iceman kazansky #top gun #my ice is an army brat but joined the navy cause ‘like hell am i flying choppers’

28 notes · View notes