#idk if i really count but yknow
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Btw y'all we started hatching some chicken and we have no clue what breed they are because
1. We have an austra white hen, a red faced silkie hen, a Brahma hen, a black australorp/black sex link hen, a barred rock hen, a booted Bantam rooster (white yellow grey), and a black laced gold wyandotte rooster.
And 2. We don't know which eggs are coming from who so 3 of the current chicks are black with speckles and 2 are sorta cinnamon coloured
Honestly it's insane how these guys look and I can't wait to figure out what they are when they're older (current photos ⬇️)










#sorry im ranting again#poultry and farm birds in general are my favourite things#btw the emo turkeys are getting so big now#they so goofy#farmer rant#idk if i really count but yknow#also we have 4 guinea hens too#idk if i mentioned them#and some younger chickens too#theres 5 silkies-3 barred rock or smthn-a white headed black bodied one (cant tell what she is)-a booted bantam hen-and another black breed#i cant identify them rlly#we got so many birds rn
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yangtober day 29: idol/rockstar i promise this makes slightly(?) more sense if you look at tomorrow's prompt (3 kingdoms) and guess who i'll be drawing yang as LOL anyway... ya boi kongming/paripi komei AU because i can imagine julian as an idol more easily than yang 😂
#yang wenli#julian mintz#legend of the galactic heroes#lotgh#logh#gineiden#i know DNT had that whole like. merch line thing where a lot of the characters got drawn as idols but likee idk i still don't really see it#anyway this one basically counts for today and tomorrow doesn't it LMAOOO this is a pretty out of nowhere au but like..#yes i am going to draw yang as zhuge liang/kongming. yes it is kind of the obvious pick but. yknow. it works#julian gets to rock eiko's short shorts because i got distracted changing his jacket to the one he buys on fezzan and forgot abt the pants#also ya boi kongming is good if you havent watched it. it has such a funny premise (zhuge liang isekai) and i enjoyed it a lot lol#yangtober 2024#arttag
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uh idk what happened. i was just drawing and then... this. wow look at him he's so... pink.
#digital art#fanart#idk#tloz fanart#hero of legend#does this count as lu?#uh..#maybe#yknow what?#i'm still gonna tag it#lu legend#ur welcome#it's emo Legend!!#... or is it punk?#scene?#i really have no idea
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#shigaraki tomura#traditional art#acrylic painting (somewhat lol)#I used a chisel pen so idk if it counts as a marker but it doesn't really look like a pen. so I said marker in the ID#commissions open#art#sketch#image described#id in alt#bnha fanart#so that ending huh. idk what I was expecting from a series that has consistently disappointed me lol. but yknow what they say about-#- something that COULD be good. hahahaha#mha shigaraki
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to be fair, I don't think qroier not trusting qbad is particularly new haha. i think it's been going on for a while even before purgatory. the only thing purgatory did with that particularly relationship is it gave qroier an excuse to be more vocal in his annoyance


( @lucienff the themes of these are similar so I’m answering the ask and responding in one post instead of the comments, hope you don’t mind :3 )
I agree with the read that Roier didn’t particularly trust Bad before, but I think that at a baseline, Roier doesn’t have much trust with most anyone to begin with. I think everything that had happened with Spreen back in the beginning of the server is something that is a large cause in that, because its still something he is suffering from months later - it’s just in true Roier fashion, it’s something he doesn’t really talk about to others. He’s only recently shared it and talked about it with Cellbit.
But even then, he had a respect for Bad. When the eggs first went missing, and they were both visibly affected by the stress, they had moments of somewhat acknowledging the other, but sticking to the script of “oh I’m fine” yknow what I mean? And before purgatory, yeah, there was no doubt that Bad cared for the eggs, and could be trusted in that regard.
But post Purgatory, I think that baseline trust has been shaken. He doesn’t let Bad see Pepito when he visited the castle, makes excuses for him to leave, and then afterwards talks to himself about how he’s angry that everyone seems to have forgotten Purgatory (both in the context that he also doesn’t trust Pepito, and he doesn’t want Bad coming up to him as if the past two weeks didn’t happen). When Leo wakes up, and Bad is around trying to talk with them, he makes a point of pulling her away. Of putting himself between Leo and Bad. And it’s in the subtle, usual jesting way he’s done before with Bad (“you can only drink lava once yknow. sure, try it, I’m not going though!” and “stranger danger Leo, stranger danger!” etc etc. said with enough dramatics it keeps it lighthearted, because that’s what Roier does).
I don’t think Roier is actively thinking he should mistrust Bad with the eggs specifically. I don’t think that he thinks Bad doesn’t care about the eggs. I just think he hasn’t fully trusted Bad before, and now since Purgatory he doesn’t trust him at all, for good reason - Bad was very much an instigator and a cause for both his own torment and his family’s (Jaiden namely, what with the spawn killing, and Cellbit, Foolish). It’s no longer a ‘this guy is a thorn in my side and I don’t trust him’ kinda petty drama between islanders. It’s a ‘this guy went back on the deal to keep the score 50/50 and did so under the impression we as the losing team could die’ kind of situation. A ‘we spent the past few weeks in hell and this guy repeatedly not only killed, but went over the top in tormenting my family and myself, I don’t trust him’ kind of situation. It’s not an excuse to be petty or properly annoyed, it’s a result of how Bad burned all his bridges in purgatory. It’s in large part a trauma response.
It doesn’t matter that Bad has never once been a threat to Leo, that he’s taken care of her multiple times, that he has always checked in with the eggs and cared for them - it matters that Leo is his sister, that Pepito is under his care, and he Does Not Trust Bad.
#it’s like yeah there’s always been the half joshing around half ‘man I hate that guy’ thing between them. not quite like bad and foolish bu#similar enough I agree#but like. purgatory got serious quick. and Roier is not going to pretend like it didn’t happen. and he’s not moving on as everyone else is#or how everyone else seems to be I should say#so it’s like. yeah Roier doesn’t really fully trust anybody. but from the events of purgatory he Really does not trust Bad#I think it’s just more intense than that yknow. bad is so quick to brush off purgatory as something that can be looked over (not counting -#-the times he just doesn’t remember it at all due to his memory loss) because it’s inconsequential to him. and he has this way of#brushing off extreme things because he both genuinely has a different moral viewpoint and because he can and will ‘I’m just a little guy#and ‘what’s a little psychological and physical torment between friends :3’ his way outta it#but it is serious. especially to the others. especially to Roier. it’s not just gonna be swept under and there will continue to be fallouts#idk. it’s not just a case of ‘I always knew I hated that guy and now I have an excuse’. it’s a ‘I am in severe psychological distress in#large part to this guy in particular and do not trust him with the time of day’ yknow what I mean#everyone has been showing their own trauma from purgatory but Roier is especially showing the mistrust and anger from it#mcyt#qsmp#q!bbh#q!roier#anon#z speaks
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too biromantic to be fully comfortable just calling myself aromantic, too aromantic to be fully comfortable just calling myself biromantic, just unconventional enough to finally confront this as a result of me writing askewniverse fanfic of all things. *hbomberguy voice* remember when that was the point of my research?
#ike.txt#i'm. both of them yes <3 not outside the boxes. i have a foot in one box and the other foot in the other box. hooray#i looked into it more and it seems the most fitting label for me would be demiromantic but#i feel like the infrequency of the attraction matters more than the fact it only happens under those specific circumstances yknow#also idk if one of my past crushes counts as a strong emotional bond situation#yeah we were friends for a few months at that point iirc but we weren't really Close yknow
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i love being black and transsexual !!
#wore a binder at work today for the first time and it felt sooooooo good holy shit#i have been too scared to bind at work cause my job does involve physical labor and i feel like people are always like#do not exercize while binding or you will explode and die. yknow. so i was kinda scared cause idk what counts as exercize ??#like its just lifting heavy shit occasionally but idk. i was scared. but like. i just could not stand not binding anymore like it was bad#and idk. i felt really good today!!! like. wayyy less drained than usual?? which is maybe due to other things#but idk. had a good day overall.
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#spoon doodles#auaugh i know i just posted this like an hour ago on the soulmate kids blog#and i said id keep soulmate kid stuff on that blog#but yknow#hes not reallllyyyyy a soulmate kid#hes just the rendoc baby yknow#and theyre not like.. soulmates#so it doesnt really count#idk im just making excuses to post it again#atom
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juppet
#hermitcraft#hermitblr#joehills fanart#joehills#doodles#it's been literal years since i sat down and intentionally made *art*#i've done a few sketches here and there#yknow?#but i feel like nothing ive done really counts as *art*#idek how to make art anymore#i drew imp and skizz too but idk how i feel about them#if anyone rlly wants to see them ill post them but til then#im just gonna keep the bros to myself#anyway#juppet#joehills puppet
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i haven’t watched KFP4 yet, but FOX THIEVES FOX THIEVES FOX THIEVES FOX THIEVES—
[Text:]
• Grappling Tail (tip turns into “fingers” when about to grab something/someone)
• Fingerless + Toeless Gloves Casts
• Retractable Claws (on both toes and fingers)
• Facial markings + whiskers!!
• Can slip items inside surcoat
#kung fu panda#kung fu panda 4#my art#kfp zhen#i have been tiny spoiled by something but it isn’t related to the story#but i sort of expected it before KFP4 was released :(#regardless i have tthe KFP4 tag filtered out from my feed until i see the movie but wanted to go for my own Zhen design#and yeah ik Zhen is based on the Corsac Fox and I’m not complaining but decided to join the Zhen Redesign train (or ‘ReZhen’—COUGH i’m#sorry i’m a pun person)#for the fun of it#idk what the cross belt is on Zhen’s official design so i left it out (probably: i need to watch KFP4 first before i decide)#i should correct something: the tip of the tail is entirely black (and the tail’s ‘fingers’ count)#my brain was in dreamland#also the surcoat and scarf-hood aren’t really the right colors but yknow for the sake of clearer outlines
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I'm working on something that's not Sorry It's Locked right now (perhaps something that i was inspired to pick up again by seeing Sickmutes skully and the operator art hehehe) so have a snippet of it.
kinda nsfw? I guess what Alex says kinda insinuates the situation they're in (...and y'know, smut is just what I write for the most part, i consider myself a smut writer) putting it under a thingy anyway because i talk a bit more about the fic, and that is definitely a bit nsfw
Anyway, no idea what this fic's gonna be called, but it's so self indulgent and has weird ass kinks in it. like, normal weird like tentacle sex and gunplay and super rough fucking, and also just, ones that are probably a little too weird to be considered normal weird? like getting filled with pitch black, inhuman cum so much it leaks out of your eyes and comes up your throat💀 so... yeah. theres that i guess.
I'm gonna have so much fun with it.
God knows why I ever stopped writing it. got caught up in sorry its locked probably
#I'm hoping to keep it to somewhere between 20-40k words? I think?#A lot of stuff happens in it. yknow. multiple rounds. the operator showing up and joining in. all that jazz#It might be a while before this one gets posted tho cos i wanna upload the whole thing at once#even if i have to split it into chapters to make it readable lol#idk. anyway#marble hornets#jaylex#who's surprised that its them again? not me#they're just so easy to project onto and they just seem the kinkiest to me#i love brian and tim but they always seem either vanilla or like they go down the heavy praise kinda route instead of sadism and all that#except for that one brilex fic i uploaded this morning. but that was super short so it doesnt count#i didn't really get to sink my teeth into their dynamic in that one like i will with this#sorry i'll shut up now
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holy shit you got carjacked? that must've been terrifying
oh yeah in the moment it was pretty wild. had a hard time sleeping that night obviously. but honestly between my roommate and my family & friends and everybody being very cool about it and letting me talk through it like, IMMEDIATELY, the discomfort was honestly pretty limited.
PLUS my car was a piece of shit anyway. it was so shitty that it actually broke down on the dude who stole it, which led to the police catching him. it ALSO led to my insurance company declaring the car totaled and paying me the full value of the damn thing, which helped me get a new car pretty quickly.
my roommate also had the catalytic converter stolen off their car in that parking lot a few days later, so they were actually 100% cool with breaking our lease at that apartment and moving somewhere else pretty much right away, and we magically found a really NICE apartment in our budget, like. nicer than the old place by A Significant Margin.
BASICALLY it sucked and was bad, but it snowballed very quickly into me having a way nicer car and apartment than i did before, so???
i can't, uh, really complain about this man taking my car from me at gunpoint, aside from the fact that it made me briefly afraid for my life and also i had to interact with cops a lot afterward???
and honestly. one of the cops was like a really hot butch woman and i know I KNOW ACAB okay? and like im aroace so its not like i wouldve done anything anyway but like. im also gay and i have eyes you know if it had to be ANY cop im just saying,
#words#sigh. butch cop if youre out there i hope you figure it all out#ANYWAY YEAH I WAS ALSO NOT VERY GOOD AT GETTING ROBBED#THE GUY ASKED ME FOR MY KEYS AND NOT ONLY DID I GIVE HIM THE MOST TIRED AND WITHERING SIGH BEFORE SAYING 'OK' AND HANDING THEM OVER#BUT I ALSO ASKED HIM AFTERWARDS IF I COULD HAVE MY APARTMENT KEY BACK BECAUSE I WASNT SURE IF MY ROOMMATE WAS AWAKE TO LET ME IN#he said no and demanded my wallet which i didnt have so i kinda. argued with him about that too#like idk if it counts as arguing because i really was just telling him 'no for real i dont have it on me im sorry' repeatedly#until he got tired of my shit and got into my car and left#but yknow im just like. im kinda surprised i didnt get shot is what im saying. i was like a deeply annoying robbery victim.
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hate how im now at a point where im legit like kicking my legs and grinning like an idiot over fictional characters SEND HELP
#take One Guess who im talking about. YES ITS KOI BOI#hes so prettyyyyy and cute and lovely and i love looking at him i wanna hear him speak and laugh and sing just AAAAAAAAAAAA#(turns to my own brain) BITCH WE ARE MEANT TO BE AROACE WHY ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH TWO FICTIONAL CRIMINALS WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?????#my brain: (that fuckin anime girl gif from evangelion (i think??))#like fuuuuuck man is it self shipping if u use a proxy? like. hes an oc but he's a stand in for me. he is me and i am him but we also arent#he is his own person and i am my own our lives are very very different but i use him to express love for Mad Dog and Koi Boy#cause they could actually love him if i were in their world i wouldnt stand a chance but my boy has one so he loves them for me#its far easier to imagine him kissing them than it is for me to imagine myself kissing them but that might be because im wired weird#idk it *feels* like it counts yknow. my dumbass out here gettin jealous when i see a Certain Ship cause like i disagree with it on#a Fundamental Level. and on TOP of that half the time the art is so CUTE and im like 'motherfucker that should be ME' or i guess my lad but#STILL am i making sense?? doesnt help that i worry im like. misreading what content i have but also fuck you i can do what i want and also#i get him more than yall kgyugkhjhk (jk jk. Unless) basically when i call them my boyfriends i fuckin mean it#look its Real Missing Nishiki Hours i love him i wanna kiss his perfect face someone shoulda shown him love i could save him and he could#make me worse <3 I Want Him#and do not get me wrong i may be focused on him but Majima is still my wifey too!!! hes mine you cant have her <3#i just have koi boy brainrot i very much desire them Both (YES THAT MIGHT BE WHY I SHIP THEM TOO LOOK I ALSO THINK THEYD WORK WELL TOGETHER#OR AT LEAST HAVE A FUN DYNAMIC TO EXPLORE I SHOULD DATE THEM AND THEY SHOULD DATE EACH OTHER WE ALL HAVE 2 HANDS)#might delete this in the mornin who knows but im feelin silly i wanna talk about them i wanna talk about my boy but idk if ppl would really#GET IT yknow i can think of maybe Two People and that INCLUDES bestie but just aaaa point is i love my koi boy so much hes so lovely <3 <3
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Guess who's spending Eid away from home again next year lol
#me bitch#i havent went home for eid for 2 years and if you count next year then make it 3#so fyi first day of eid is estimated to be on the 10 of april 2024 which is Wednesday#so my classmates estimate that the classes on monday and tuesday will be online so they started to buy the tickets on Friday (5/4)#or during the weekend basically because yknow festive season = expensive tickets#and i told it to my friend and she chekced the ticket to go to kl and its only 200+ (official app) or 100+ (travel company) on 6/4 at 5am#so she asked me if i want to buy it so we can share transport to airport together and be in the same flight#so i called mom just now but since i need to take the transit to ny hometown it racks up to rm800+ 💀#totalled with the flights back to uni on sunday (14/4) it will be up to rm1600+ 💀#mom sound sorry and even said she can pay if i really want to go back home#but yknow i dont want to burden my parents more (they are the one who usually pay for my flights anyway)#and my friend who lives in the same state as me also doesnt seem to be able to afford the expensive tickets too#so its just me and her in the perantauan again ig lol#but my friend who lives here said to just celebrate eid with her and we can sleep in her room 😂#tbh i dont really mind not going back because as i get older the excitement for eid lessen idk#but i kinda miss the bersalam on the morning of eid with my family so yeah#and if i were to graduate and start working which i cant imagine ngl then i wont be home much anyway#whatever at least i get to fast at home for a week so theres still some W to celebrate#personal.txt
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I was on the wikipedia page for phobias just for fun but just discovered theres an actual word for a fear of being touched.. 🥹
#haphephobia.... and they list guts from berserk under pop culture references 😢😢😭😭 thats my guy....#not gonna lie i teared up a bit i didnt realise it 'counted' as an actual phobia#i find it really difficult to talk abt but i have a complicated relationship w touch/physical contact (likely trauma babeyy)#and while i do crave it a lot i also have a very physical reflexive fear response especially if its intentional + i dont expect it#which can sometimes even get triggered just being in proximity to ppl bc like. even the possibility sets me on fucking edge#it would be nice to be as physically affectionate as i naturally want to be without dealing w my fight/flight/freeze but alas#its weird bc there are some random situations where it doesnt get triggered at all but its so unpredictable every time#and varies wildly person to person for seemingly no reason. there r strangers im innately more comfortable with but also friends ive known#for years and will never be comfortable around. i think part of that depends on how strongly the other person communicates and whether-#i feel as if theyre demonstrably able to respect boundaries not just mine but their own too + understand theyre not always fixed#ideally i need to have had this conversation with them so i Know they understand. which is rly difficult i find it so hard to admit#and i have a complicated mental block where i need the other person to naturally bring it up which very very rarely ever happens#idk just an atmosphere of safety yknow. i think its intentional touch that specifically makes me panic bc im usually fine w like-#bustling crowds or even expected social rules like handshakes at interviews. bc its not like they're Trying To Touch Me its just rote idk#hopefully eventually ill reach a place where im able to unpack it and reduce its severity bc man sometimes its fucking heartbreaking to me#bc i do genuinely really like physical contact im an incredibly physical person its my main way of interacting w the world#and the way having to force myself to avoid it meshes w my rsd too augh.... its a clusterfuck#even just having one person im completely comfortable with. maaaaan.#almost makes me miss my ex. at least i was mostly cool around them#god its sucked lately ive been having weird vivid dreams related to it. but whatever its so far down my list of problems to prioritize#and at least i dont get it w my familys dog so i can cuddle her :^) i miss her i cant wait to see her next month :D#anywayyyy thats enough im so tired goodnight every1...#.diaries
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FINAL THOUGHT BEFORE I ACTULLY GO BACK AND STUDY but PERSONALLY i think it would have been cool if they added further on abel's flashbacks, like watching the progression of abel slowly becoming so fixated on helena. ig to me the only explanation for abel at the ending was "it was the witch's curse that made him lose himself" so i just feel that i wouldve liked to see a tad bit more of just watching this man grovel in his desperation or just. slowly lose his sanity to the curse. idk
#im not saying this well at all#but just.... i think...there wasnt really a hint of that.... at least to me...#maybe so! but to me it just seemed like a genuine obsession/love towards helena as his first and only friend ?#so it becomes hard to distinguish between witchs curse vs his own feelings#and maybe thats something that wouldve been good to build on yknow. idk.#like maybe if we saw a bit more of helenas feelings but we didnt#...does setting him on fire count as what her true feelings were towards him? LAKSDJFASLKDJH#THATS PROBABLY THE WORST WAY EVER TO SHOW THAT LMAOOOO#okay okay thinking too hard#snow speaks#fena pirate princess
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