#idk i'm scared but i've talked abt doing this for years

[l3irdl3rain]

listen guys. hold my hand. we can play dragon age veilguard together. it could be fun. i could make youtube videos or stream it or something. but you have to be nice to me about it bc im very bad at video games and very sensitive

[ame-to-ame]

Rereading ayaka is in love with Hiroko senpai!!! Last time I read it I don't think it was finished/I didn't finish it but ack. Now I also want to be in love 😭😭😭

[newwavesylviaplath]

hey newwavsylviaplath nation i'm gonna do a silly little vent post cuz im scared and i need to talk abt it but also i think the concept of vent posts are super cringe but idk desperate times call for desperate measures ig??

i missed lunch with my friends today and came back and they were all acting super weird to me in the class we have all together?? the only girl who wasn't acting weird was the other one who didn't hangout with them at lunch. i've already been so scared that im unwanted and annoying them and now im panicking cuz like they all chose to say somewhere other than right beside me and the one that did sit beside me had to cuz there were no other seats and they wouldn't talk to me unless i talked to them first and they were being so short with me but giggling with each other and making halloween plans and then i got home and checked the groupchat and they were talking about having a sleepover but the way they were talking about it seemed like they had already had it planned when i had no idea they even wanted to have one?? also like i sent something to gc a few days ago and they all saw it and none of them liked it and none of them have liked any of my stories or anything since and im so nervous. i especially think one of my closer friends is pissed with me cuz she was the earliest to arrive and chose to sit the furthest away from me and when i asked her if i could borrow a pen she deadass said "did you ask anyone closer to you first?" which is so weird i literally don't know what's going on but this is like the exact same thing that happened to me two years ago when my entire friend group totally dropped me on halloween. i literally have no one to talk to and my mom said to just like wait it out and not say anything rn cuz it might annoy them and like i know she's right but i just don't understand if i did something they were literally all laughing with eachother and having a good time it's not like it was a bad day for them or anything:( literally the only other friend i had moved like four hours away in august and hasn't responded to me in two weeks plus she like she hid my stories on instagram so she didn't have to view them?? what the fuck u guys

[robinmage]

hey beautiful, can you please tell us what alien stage is and how to start watching it... i don't want to google it bc i'm scared of spoilers 😞

HELLO MY DEAREST LOVELY DARLING IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

alien stage is a short animated music video series by studio lico, produced by artists VIVINOS and QMENG. the premise is that humanity has been overrun by aliens, and the main characters are (presumably born in captivity) human children that were placed in a facility meant to train them to sing for the highly-popular "alien stage" competition. however, when you have people who trained together most of their lives and are already incredibly familiar and friendly with each other, and force them to compete AGAINST each other......

it's 100% free to watch on VIVINOS youtube channel. here's the up-to-date playlist (in reverse order idk why they did that). it should take only about a half hour to watch, and a new video comes out approximately every 3-4 months.

if you have the time I would highly recommend watching some of VIVINOS' other work, they do a lot of what I call "pink sparkle horror", and is all around an incredibly talented artist and animator. I've been watching their stuff for years and I'm a big fan 👍

THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME THE EXCUSE TO TALK ABT ALIEN STAGE I LOVE U I HOPE U ENJOY ♥️

[whataboutsimple]

Warning! Under the cut it's just Alex whining about his life and nothing more. So basically useless post lmao- oh, yeah, curses. Lots of. Curses. Yeah, I don't recommend reading this tbh

Now what the fuck, how people manage to live their life normally and than there's me. What is wrong with me?

No, no, listen. I get it, no human can be perfect, but it frustrates me so much that I can't get exactly what's up with me. You saw other ppl on this app? Three posts a day MAX, and what do I do?

Third of August the first very post, all the way to 17 of August.

Tham it's 9 of September and since than no breaks (well, maybe Little like for a day or two)

Currently I have 397 posts, and if math is mathing, than it's about ≈8 posts each day.

8 posts each day, and I haven't posted even half of what I wanted. Or the asks I'm getting (I love them though)

What I'm implying? I can't focus even for a second on my school, better shoot me than make me doing my English, all the homework I've done so far I've done in five minutes before the class itself started. You see it?

AND THAT'S even not the full thing, I can't focus even on writing or drawing, that's why I didn't upload all the stuff, because I can't make myself create it! I have the idea in the head, I want to put it on the paper, but I can't.

The hands, the brain, they work only in a stress situations, when it's either getting an F, or doing the freaking work god damn it.

Sometimes I don't even want to touch my phone or get up from bed. All I want is to, idk, nap until I'll feel myself as if I rested.

Don't even get me started on trying to look through my mental health, I've been doing it, and you know what? I can't normally say to myself "Hey, those symptoms are kind of remind me of ourselves. Maybe we are not as healthy as we pretend we are?" Nonono, because it always will end up in self doubting like "What if I'm lying? What if I just know those symptoms are implying this and try to adjust to them to look so "poor, poor child" like? What if I just try to convince myself that something is wrong with me or simply want attention?"

Okay, like, I've been searching for symptoms of autism and ADHD for so long, reading forums and what other ppl with such things say. God, I even went through thos dumb "online tests" out of boredom and you know what? It's like 90% that I do have both, but yet again what if I'm lying? I'm perfectly healthy, I should be, I'm just lazy and dumb to do the work.

I have autistic cousin for example, and I act a lot like them and a lot like not them. Even my family always compares us, but when it's me, they go like "Well, you're not autistic, so it should be fine for you, stop acting like that!"

Yeah, woman, I'm perfectly fine, I'm just dying everytime I need to interact with ppl in reality and have heartbeat over probably 500 because it beats so loud I can almost hear it.

I've been to therapist like twice after some tragic moment in my life, because I started having horrible panic attacks, so strong even my Mon got worried, and all they managed to diagnose is PTSD after what my mother like. Just stopped the sessions. And those times when I were there, I was too scared to ask them if I may or may not have, idk, ADHD, autism or depression or anxiety or whatever because I just want to know what is wrong with me.

Because normal people won't act like I'm.

You think the dog thing is a joke? Well, yeah, it is, but I'm really eager for any interaction and reaction I can get. I don't even care abt kudos and stuff as long as you commented or reposted saying something. I'm going to die on the spot and if I had a tail it would've 100% wagged.

But when it comes to ppl in real life, I don't want to have them near me, to be in one room with them, to hear them. I can chat, I love chatting, I love talking, but only with texts. There are literally only three ppl who I can call: my mom, my grandma and my online friend.

And online friend waited for 4 years before we had a first call, voice call.

That's not normal, is it?

And like that I'm lost in me thoughts. The point is that I want to know what's wrong with me really bad, but at the same time I'm doubting if there's something wrong and I'm not just a lazy sore looser who tries to hide from responsibility in the internet. And even that I'm doing horribly.

Dang it.

[lunicho]

Saw this on another blog and wanted to send it to you too ☺️

Pick any 5 moots and describe them using 3 words! <3

ooh this is so cute, i love when ppl ask me to talk abt my moots cuz i love bragging about them!! the hard part is picking 5 moots to do this with hmm

@adoresol - passionate, honest, and devoted. i have actually been good friends with her for a good like four years now i think omg so there's many words to describe her but i think these are the best ones for now. she feels deeply and is very genuine in her emotions which is something i admire about her. she's also extremely honest, i love this about her because if i ask her something she'll be straight up with me. she's also very devoted bc like why is she still my friend LMAOOO she's so loyal and just like!?!?!?!?!?!??! my pookie wookie bear fr, i've told her so much cheesy corny shit abt how i feel abt our friendship so i'll spare y'all

@kissohee - its so hard to describe her with just three words! but i would say chaotic, lovable, and genuine. i never feel stress when talking to her and we've grown comfortable with one another quite quickly. i think we just have had this connection from the beginning and she just made me so so comfortable. she's also so loveable like im gonna hold her hand fr she's so cute. and she's so genuine, i always feel that she means everything that she says and it makes me even more comfy with her. she's also just like me we're both so random and we both talk a lot so its the perfect pace for me. the convos are always so fast like idk if ppl would be able to keep up with us and how much we switch topics LMAO but yeah! i hope that we just get closer and closer in the future and that she's always happy <3 (also open-minded would be a rlly good one for her but only her and i know why and that's the way its gonna stay LMAO)

@sminiac - saiii!!! i never include her in my moots posts so i wanted to this time :3! i'm gonna say kind, inviting, and adorable. she's literally so so kind, everytime i send smth or interact with her she's like "my dearest bunny!" AND IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY SO SO HAPPY!! she's always so sweet to me and like idk smth abt her is just so adorable. plus her blog rn is so adorable i love the layout. i do still get anxious to send too much stuff and things like that but ur so so welcoming and inviting that ik im always welcome but im scared to be annoying LMAOGDJ. i hope we can yap more and more abt 8turn tgt and just chat some more!!

@bubblegyu00 - energetic, humorous, and chatty,, our convos are extremely fast paced and go on for the entire day. i'm always laughing at smth or we're always losing it over smth someone did (usually a zb1 member or nicho tbh). she's energetic and keeps up with my pace and i do the same with hers. she also makes me laugh which is why i said she's humorous. we're always going on and on abt the same 3 things yet we never get tired of it like its gonna eat every single time PLS. BUT YEAH she's super fun, her nonnie to friend storyline is very very iconic and i love that for her. can't wait to keep screaming about kyungmin over and over <33

@xhdream - we've started to talk in the dms now and dinna's such a sweet girlie :(. i would describe her as easy-going, charming, and friendly. dinna's sooo so cute and always so sweet to me and she has been since the beginning. talking to her has been so fun so far cuz she's very approachable and she engages in the conversation so so much. our time difference is very big so we have to catch each other at a specific time but it's worth it everytime. there's just something about her that's so fun and so kind and that's why i said she's charming. her and her blog just have this good and sweet energy that i really really enjoy <3

[cleaningishard]

i've been thinking maybe i should talk to my family abt how i've been depressed and maybe try to get into therapy or something because even if i'm doing better if i don't change anything it'll just get bad again, right? but i really don't think we can afford therapy right now and also i probably don't even actually have depression, right? so what if i go and it's blatantly obvious that i've never been depressed and i've just been lazy and gross for like a year and a half with no real reason than... idk, i'm a bum or something? also idk i'd rather not cry in front of people even a therapist and i don't know how i feel about telling my family or how they'll react. my mother has bipolar and my sister has anxiety so what if by thinking i have depression i'm being insensitive or invalidating their experiences because i want an excuse for my behavior or just thought it'd make me more interesting, y'know? sorry, i don't expect anyone to respond to this i'm just worried about it. i just don't want things to get bad again but i'm scared to go to therapy even if i had the ability and i don't even know if i'm actually depressed and it's all a lot.

[ichorblossoms]

for the ask meme can i get uhhhh yarrow + face, serena + motion, grimm + favorite

HI HELLO JANE!!!!! sorry this took awhile to get around to answering i wrote all the text and told myself i was gonna draw pictures for these and then i got distracted because i wanted to draw. other pictures instead :,D BUT without further ado !!

face: Describe your OC's face. What's their smile like? Are their orbs cerulean? What would someone notice first when looking at them?

i don't trust my writing skills enough to write a description. their face:

i talked a little bit abt their facial features in this ask, but yeah, the Bee Stuff is definitely what people notice first. yarrow's modification was an experimental one, so while most people are kinda used to seeing humods with fur on their faces or weird ears or maybe horns and whatnot, invertebrate features are rare and jarring. this does cause issues when you're trying to be discreet, so yarrow tries their best to wear bandanas or masks. even pre-modification they actually wear something to the effect of a bandana or surgical mask often; partially because They Are A Doctor and also because they live in a mining town that doesn't give a shit about how much dust is kicked up from the open-pit mining

pre-modification i'm not sure what people would notice first; they have a few small defining features like their dimples, yellow-gold eyes, straight teeth, patchy facial hair, and mole on their right cheek, but overall nothing out of the ordinary. i think it's less features people notice, and a general impression of openess? he's quick to smile, talkative, and expressive, so people usually feel like they can approach him

motion: How does your OC move? How does their clothing help or hinder their range of motion? Are they flexible, coordinated, clumsy?

having trained in martial arts for most of her life, serena's very coordinated and flexible! she also has a muscular stature and she can make herself very difficult to move if she doesn't want to. she's aware of her size and generally has a slouch to her posture and walks with a bit of a trudge and lope if that makes sense? she has enough control though to where she can move almost freakishly quiet and it scares people on occasion

ofc she doesn't wear clothes, but she does have her prosthesis!

she's got both an everyday and a sport prosthesis, so while her movement isn't necessarily affected by that, she's less willing to run or do anything intense if she just has her everyday prosthesis on (that's the one i draw, i need to look more into sport prostheses for humans and adapt a design from there)

bc she's a congenital amputee, the only real adjustment she's had to do irt her leg is adapting to a new prosthesis every few years, so she has a solid sense of moving with or without it on. i've been trying to determine if she has smthin like an adapted wheelchair as well, but since dragons are quadrupeds and she's only missing part of a limb, it may not be necessary when she also has her tail and wings to help counterbalance during movement...? there's also the factor that she doesn't have a lot of money, so regardless of what she has to assist her, it's not always top-quality and she's learned to live with a certain level of discomfort and pain

speaking of wings, flying is something dragons can do, but it's a lot like running where most ppl can't do it for longer periods of time unless they train. it's not as necessary in modern society, so most dragons can fly for short bursts if needed/for fun. with the exception of a few who do things like, idk fly to work, most rely on transit bc it's easier. serena's ability to fly is Okay, she's accumulated some damage to her wings over the years (side effect of martial arts where other people have claws and horns), which makes her less aerodynamic and more easily tired out. she's got a good handle on her body and how it moves, so she's actually pretty graceful in the air and not aware of that fact at all. overall, she prefers not to fly, but still maintains a healthy habit of working out those muscles so they don't atrophy, which is a thing that happens with modern dragons.

favorite: Does your OC have a favorite article of clothing or accessory? What is it? What's the meaning behind it? Do they wear it all the time or do they wear it sparingly to keep it safe?

am i allowed to saw wrench here. i'm gonna say wrench

saying wrench is grimm's favorite accessory is actually a stretch bc it loathes wearing it, but adores wrench as a companion but if we are purely talking abt clothing here, grimm's not the sentimental sort, so it doesn't hold on to things once they're to worn nor does it worry about wearing things out. which is the boring answer

wrench is only worn as armor a handful of times in-story and in dire circumstances (that i. have not quite figured out yet <3). grimm fucking hates wearing it, hates the way it takes them back to their past, hates the way it doesn't quite fit their body anymore and hurts if they wear it too long, hates why they even have to wear it, but it's protection and a weapon in one, and they don't have many options.

i talked abt wrench a little bit when you asked abt it here, but wrench is both an artifact of grimm's past and a dear friend. as an animal companion/robot grimm does maintain wrench to an extent and it's a good dog that doesn't age like normal animals, they have a close pet/owner bond. when it comes to "wearing" it, transforming (so to speak) doesn't cause any wear and tear on wrench itself, since that is one of the purposes it was built for, but the situations in which grimm would don wrench may result in damage and there's also an element of wanting to keep wrench safe. aside from being armor, wrench can also do stuff like jam signals for short periods of time and sense heat signatures, so it does have an interest in preserving wrench for its own work and safety as well, but it's also a pet, yknow?

post-story i'm p sure grimm and yarrow would get something equivalent to married. yarrow's the romantic and the one to suggest it ofc, but grimm's like "hell, if i'm going to symbolically tie their life to someone else's it wouldn't be anyone but yarrow" and whatever sort of wedding band/necklace/wearable symbol they choose would become grimm's favorite, esp since it represents a version of themself they like being

[little-cereal-draws]

ok I need witchy help again. There's a grove of trees behind my dorm that's being cut down and I know there's nothing I can physically do to stop it but I want to protect the animals that live there.

There are two barbed wire fences and a highway separating us so I've never actually been in it, but I've been spending several hours a day looking at this grove for abt a year and a half. There's a shipping company located behind the trees and semitrucks with shipping containers drive around it. Idk what company it is but now they're cutting down the trees, adding lights that block out the stars, and paving over it. I watched them rip about a fourth of it out with their machinery this morning.

It makes me so fucking furious I want to go over there and tell them to stop and so sad that I want to cry. Those trees have been such an important part of my own mental health even if I can't get close to them and I know SO many creatures live there. I've started having stress dreams abt them ripping it out when they started abt a week ago and a lot of my dreams involved using magic to stop it.

I tried googling it but I couldn't find any protective charms or spells for the environment, they were all protection for yourself that uses the environment. I don't want to want to hex that company, I just want to protect the animals that live there and give them a new place to stay. I am a baby witch who's also a broke/busy college student so smth that's quick and easy would be preferred but I'll take anything.

More of my angry rant under the cut bc I'm furious

List of animals that I've seen living in the trees and in the small swamp in front of it over the years:

opossums

multiple families of raccoons

a cat colony with kittens

eight different species of frogs

cranes

many different species of corvid

owls

bats

a family of red shouldered hawks

vultures

rabbits

foxes

many different species of jay

snakes

leeches (yes they deserve to be saved too)

turtles

skinks

lizards

geckos

many different species of insects, there's no way I can list them all

hummingbirds

mourning doves

a singular alligator

Every single fucking day I watch the cranes fly East to sleep on the river as the sun sets. I've seen them fly West to the swamps as the sun rises too. I saw two vultures courting the other day. The raccoons, cats, and opossums don't run from me anymore and will happily let me get within a few feet of them (I never try to touch them). I know exactly which trees the bats live in. I saw a moth that was bright blue and orange, mimicking a species of wasp. I saw a species of hawk I had never seen before. I talk and sing to the trees even if there are no animals there. That was the only place I've seen a wild fox. The cranes land in the swamp and hunt the frogs. There's a huge bullfrog that lives in the back corner. I've saved baby snakes and turtles from cars. They both easily fit in the palm of my hand. I thought I found an injured bird the other day and was totally ready to help it even though I don't know how (it turned out to be fine, just behaving really strangely). Every time it rains, I go out and pick worms off the sidewalk for hours. The trees are where I go to get away from the stress of my schoolwork, my two jobs, and my roommates.

I need this ecosystem so fucking much, I have hung so much of my mental health on it and now they're coming in and ripping it out and paving over it!!!! They're putting more barbed wire, more pavement, more streetlights. I want to see the tall grass and the puddles and the trees and the hills not a FUCKING PARKING LOT WITH TRUCKS BEHIND A FENCE. I AM SO SCARED FOR THE CREATURES THAT LIVE THERE, I NEED THEM TO BE OK. EVEN IF I LOSE THE TREES, I'LL FEEL BETTER KNOWING THAT THE ANIMALS ARE SOMEPLACE SAFE. THERE'S A HIGHWAY LITERALLY ON ALL SIDES, I DON'T KNOW WHERE ELSE THEY CAN GO. I NEED THEM TO BE OK

[j2zara]

Hiiiiii~ 2, 4, 7, 10, 22, 24, 30 for the fic writer game! 💖

Hiiiii friend! Sorry this took all day my brain is dead rn

2. a character whose POV you’re currently exploring

Lol i'm banging my head against the wall getting killed by LJ3porter fic so i'm like. Right in Girlfail Ellie J4 POV hell rn!!!! She's so fun and i do think writing for her is both easy and hard in that i enjoy doing it (and tbh i think i default to her pov usually when im in LJ3 mode) but i worry i make her way too sopping wet and pathetic. Which she can be pathetic but i worry im going like. way too sad wattpad girl with her.

4. a story idea you haven’t written yet

OK! I've talked about a few different things before so i'm gonna. Well. I'm two sentences into twelfth night j2 being sent to pursue Jace on Porter's behalf fic so i feel like that counts as "not written yet." I also talk about how. I think doing a reincarnation au for LJ3 or the clones in general would be so fun. i'm not sure what kind tho, the version in which they're all new teachers at aguefort is so fun and kinda stuck in my brain now. Plus i wanna write Barbarian teacher Tiefling!Ellie x Sorcerer teacher Aasimar!J3 like so so so so bad i think it would be such a funny way to have them never escaping the torment nexus. I also think it would be fun to write something abt LJ3 in their friends with benefits era. Or maybe one of their more official "date nights". I think if they got into doing roleplay in the bedroom is would be so so so so so so fucking funny. Like. Pretending the other is stranger they picked up at the bar or something.

7. your preferred writing fonts

Tbh i kinda would like to find a perfect writing font? I tend to default Arial and it doesn't look perfect its honestly kinda offputting but. my strategy is. When I feel like my writing looks so so so busted i switch to Verdana which is closer to the ao3 font so i can better visualize how it's gonna look. And that helps a bit. Idk im sick.

10. what is the longest amount of time you’ve let a draft rest before you finished it?

That's a good question. Actually? A couple years i think? I abandoned my old talentswap for a couple years before picking it up again in college. (tbh my current ch 3.3 is STILL unfinished so i abandoned it again). Tbh i'm not good at letting drafts rest and returning back to them. I either try to power through or end up abandoning it which i don't love

22. do you ever worry about public reaction to what you’re writing? how do you get past that?

I try not to but like. Yeah. I'm stressed basically every time. I joke that when i write original fiction that i have a hoard of angry twitter pearlclutchers that live in my head ready to rip everything i do to shreds but i try not to listen to them. But i'm worried every time. This has nothing to do with how i feel about you guys tbh i wildly underestimate your guys kindness and goodwill just bc im very hard on myself

I was anxious abt IYWD (I was worried it was gonna come across as too soft or too apologetic). I was anxious that nobody would take to Dyke!Jace/Zara in Who Can Blame a Girl, or i wouldn't be able to sell it

I probably MOST anxious of all about Almost (I was SO stressed that ppl were not gonna vibe at all with Bluejay or not gel with the whole "what if the clones were actual characters" , "born to love porter cliffbreaker, forced to do menial tasks for jaceprime" etc etc thought experiment. and i was so so so so so so scared about dropping the nickname Bluejay i was worried it was gonna be completely stupid and i was completely off the mark)

I was anxious abt Biggest Lie (i was worried it wasn't hot enough or maybe too violent or that it was maybe too shamelessly just like. smut lol).

And after Almost i was probably second most anxious about Stay / Leave. It was just a wip i really struggled with and idk it was so.... insular i guess? b/c it was so niche and the wip ended up being SO LONG and kinda emotional and sappy? Like again i think i was having the same doubts i had abt j2 in which i was like what if i can't sell people on this relationship. What if i've failed to convey something sincere. (that one was crazy tho bc i really really really really tried to release it and not care what happened bc i knew only a handfull of ppl would read it and i really really really tried to be cool and for a while i was but it was just hard i was so nervous and i don't think it was anyones reaction is really was just my nerves that were putting me in such a bad and upset mood and then over the next day or two i. I made this joke earlier that like. I PROMISE and hope i'm not overinflating my ego when i say this like i'm perfectly aware that i just write silly smut online but it really was so so so so funny. to see everyone practically overnight be like.... wait. Are LJ3..... in love??? And now LJ3 is like such an integral part of clone lore.

24. how do you recharge when you’re not feeling creative?

That's a good question bc i feel like. When i'm stuck in one medium i tend to just try and distract myself with another so when im bad at drawing i write and when im bad at writing i draw. But thats not exactly recharging. Tbh i do think i need to find better things in my routine that rejuvenate me i think i haven't been particularly good at treating myself well lately

30. share a fic you’re especially proud of

I'm cringe and usually will shill if you want divinity (you're gonna have to go through me) as one of my favorite things i've ever written. But im also extremely confident most of y'all have already read it. I'm very very hard on myself so i swing between thinking the things i make suck and also being like. Fairly proud of all of them.

But idk it was my first ambitious thing i wrote and FINISHED in a long time and honestly? I do think its slightly better than the rest bc the iterations are all reliant on the original so they're very intertextual and repetitive which isn't BAD but. The extra work it took to make IYWD work makes it feel different to me. There's a LOT of stuff in it that i'm proud of that i honestly kind of miss b/c Porter is so smitten for Jace in a way he hasn't been in things i've written in a long time. I'm a softy who likes when jaceporter are soft and kinda in love... sue me... And like. i always feel so self congratulatory talking about the Loving To the Point of Invention Detect Thoughts + Teleport but i really felt good about coming up with that. And i still like the flashbacks a lot. It always feels so embarrassing to admit that i like. Get emotional thinking about the flashback of them on the bed. Sometimes i tailor make a scene just for me. "I promise i'm never going to let anything happen to you ever again" "as a paladin or a barbarian" "both" is like. Such a scene just for me. And I think the ending is good too. "I'll take it. I'll take it all" just felt so. fitting. It's so him getting to hear himself say to porter "i'll take the thing with you that is broken and fucked and full of compromises even if it has to end". Sigh. Sometimes you're an english major and you agonize over being a good writer for like two decades and realize that you might not be as horrible as you think.

(For the record. i think if i were to rank what i've written for fantasy high from fav to least fave, i'd say IYWD, Biggest Lie, Stay / Leave, Who Can Blame a Girl, Almost, Tell Me How, and it feels weird to put Almost that low bc i do like it. Tbh i regret making it so short i think i could've pushed it further)

Anyway!!! This got long winded as hell. Thanks for the asks they were fun to do!

Send me Fic Writer Asks! / Here are the questions!

[1d1195]

I LITERALLY SPENT ALL DAY READING HONEY DURING ALL MY FREE TIME AND UGHHHH☹️🫶🫶🫶🫶 THEYRE SOOOOO CUTE my goodness when he went down in the towel, PLS SHES SO MUCH STRONGER THAN ME I WOULDVE FOLDED FASTER THAN A LAWN CHAIR✋

I WAS SO SCARED THEY WERE GOING TO TAKE BABY CECE🥺 but MC was too smart for them so ofc not. THE HALLUCINATING ??? AND HIM BEING THE REASON SHE GOT OUT ???😭😭😭 GOSH i can imagine her telling him that after some time and he just…. bawls. because that is SO precious. AND HOW SHE KNEW IN SOME WAY THAT HE WAS CLOSE BY UGHHHH

IM PRETTY SURE I GOT THAT PAPER KITES SONG RECOMMENDED TO ME ON APPLE MUSIC BECAUSE OF PAINT AND HOW MUCH IVE LISTENED TO IT SINCE U SENT IT SO I KNEW I HAD TO SHARE, SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT <3333

(i know EXACTLYYYY what you mean. like, i can love a song and listen to it all the time but the second i hear something too much on the radio its just…no. HAHAHA. ALSOOOO THERE IS DEF SOMETHING ABT HIS SONG LET IT GO BECAUSE I WENT THROUGH THE SAME THING)

honestly i don’t even know, everyone is probably so done with me and my bs. i don’t want to sound ungrateful because things are so awesome but i just have NOT been feeling myself here at all. i don’t want to go out anywhere or see anybody, im so done with being perceived😭 the people we know are just wayyy to judgy, talking to them is literally draining. i’m always soooo tired, for some reason my hormones are different here and i went through the. ABSOLUTE. WORST. PMS-ING. LIKE… TERRIBLE. and things with my dad are :/// (when are they not though pfftt) i feel like my days are the same?? the only thing that changes are my outfits but i have this weird feeling like my life is on pause when it should be the opposite. i’m feeling veryyyy nostalgic for fall-winter last year.

i LOVE enjoying the little things, it really does make your day-to-day life just a little better. shifting your closet is soooo cool girl, i feel like you just get to enjoy the different times of year more wholly, you know ? COFFEE HERE IS TERRIBLE IM SO JEALOUS I MISS MY DAILY ICED COFFEE😭😭 and gilmore girls is ALWAYS right🫶 i hope you find time to read soon, other than a fanfic here and there i haven’t been reading either, i brought a bunch of books with me that are literally just sitting on a shelf. BUT I 100% GET WHAT YOU MEAN ABOUT READING A CERTAIN PART OF A BOOK JUST TO FEEL SOMETHING, i am unfortunately VERY guilty of this😞🫣 wishing you and your book boyfriends a very happily ever after 😉 AHH NOT A WEDDING😭😭😭 HAHAHA i do hope you end up having a ton of fun tho. and is it just me, or is there always a certain, something in the air when it reaches this time of year?? just a different kind of craziness than the rest of the year.

you are an absolute sweetheart and I WANTED TO TELL YOU, MY SISTER ABSOLUTELY ADORED LOVE & OTHER WORDS. LIKE, SHE WAS OBSESSED WITH IT. and i was all “omg yeahhh a friend recommended it to me☺️😌” BECAUSE WE AREEE FRIENDS !!!

i think the ranting got a lil out of hand so i’m sorry about that but THANK YOU FOR BEING SO AWESOME AND FUN TO TALK TO, IM SENDING YOU ALLLLL THE LOVE, MWAHHHHH

~🎶

Ma'am you give me some of the best ideas for check-ins. MAKING HARRY BAWL HIS EYES OUT IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE PAST TIMES. She's way stronger than me, I would have pulled that towel clean off and had a different kind of breakfast.

Idk how many hours it's been but I haven't moved on from this Paper Kites song, I'll check back in when I move onto Gregory and James.

Things can be going well and you can still feel out of sorts. I really struggle with going out and being social. I have a pretty small social battery. Also dads are the worst more often than not. I'm convinced. My bf was telling my best friend some stories about some of my rage fits I've had in the past (they still happen but they're not as bad as of late) and I'll tell you exactly what (WHO) the common denominator was in each story. Are you still out of the country at this point? Will you be coming back home soon(ish)? I honestly feel like you're homesick, maybe? Being on pause is difficult. It adds to the drained feeling. Hopefully something changes so you can get back into the swing of things and start feeling less stuck 💕

My sister did a semester abroad in europe and I know europe specifically is weird about ice. Or maybe I'm just INSANE (obvi) because I love ice so much. I want my drink cold. I probs use more ice than liquid but I don't even care. ANYWAY. Upon reading more of your message, I kind of feel like you're going through iced coffee withdrawals and if you had one all your emotions would be cured (I hope you're reading this sarcastically because of course I'm joking because I know it's more than that, but I'm hoping you know what I mean). I'm almost certain coffee fixes everything.

Me and my book bfs will def live happily ever after. The -ber months are so busy. It's insane. There's def something in the air.

I LOVE THAT SHE LOVED IT AND OF COURSE WE'RE FRIENDS 💕 I sincerely think it's one of the best books I've ever read. I had an idea to write about Harry based off it. Maybe one day. It's lost to the drafts along with a 100 other things I want to write 😭

This is a ranting blog and there's no such thing as out of hand. I'm so happy to hear from you. I was missing you so much 💕

xoxo

[imaginespazzi]

PARTTT TENN YAYAYAYAYA

- hi nivi bby your writing has been missed dearly.

- The Bridges Burned Around Us??? i fear im shaking in my boots. apparently ill be flinging myself of bridges not cliffs!

- part two has been sort of reread i went fast because im excited

- poor angie…

- “unlike HER paige” OH MY GODS AWWWWW so why don’t u make it public if she’s “yours” huh

- bruh azzi u could have healthy breathing if u just idk told your friends

- horny fuckers

- haha someone’s in trouubbbbllleee

- i like tessa she’s funny.

- jana my bby

- tessa and jana abt to be menaces together hopefully

- not them basically living together stop that’s so wholesome and cutie pie

- now why are we talking abt who paige’s has slept with azzi…

- RATHER JUMP OUT OF THE CAR IS SO ME CORE

- okay im fearful. is it abt the one year contract and like angie supposedly taking paige’s spot after the year? UGHHHH

- Stephie-bean IS SO ADORABLE

- STOP NOT STEPHIE GETTING JEALOUS 😭😭

- love. okay where is the bridge

- BYE not azzi using her daughter to stop her jealousy

- stephie being a legit mix of azzi and paige makes me so happy

- “do you know if Aunty Chérie is in town?” oh so this girl is a GENIUS

- BYE AZZI BEING A BIT OF A BITCH TO THIS KIDS MOM I LOVE IT

- OMG IS IT DREW??

- FLASHBACK TIME i love these

- awww azzi surprising paige with drew is so adorable

- BYE not the dude trying to flirt and drew stopping it 😭😭

- “you won’t ever hurt my Paigey will you?” yeah so i just died

- OH DAMN HES PISSED.

- trust stephie to make it awkward but also help ease tension

- “I don’t make promises like that kid,” there’s an unspoken accusation as Drew keeps up a smile towards Stephie but his eyes dart for the briefest second towards the two women around him, “but I promise I’ll try.” YEAH IM SCARED There’s a shine of warmth in Drew’s gaze for a second but it flickers away faster than it had appeared and his eyes are cold with flecks of betrayal as he looks at Azzi, “that’s what happens as people get older isn’t it? I wouldn’t look so different to you if you’d been around to see me grow up.” GODDAMN IM CRYING.

- i get why drew is upset with azzi. she was such a big part of his life, but omg ouch.

- the whole uncle drew thing is harming my soul. the day stephie calls paige mom in some way i won’t make it out alive.

- azzi i love u BUT PLEASE STOP OVERTHINKING EVERYTHING BING AND JUST COMMUNICATE WITH PAIGE INSTEAD OF RUINING IT IN YOUR HEAD

- UGHHH THATS THE ENDING WHY DO U END LIKE THAT U EVIL GENIUS OMG

- damn okay. the chapter ate but also the plot just gets building and as previously mentioned i am terrified for the fall.

- questions!! at the end is drew upset with paige too for getting back with azzi or just made upset with azzi leaving to begin with and projecting it onto both of them sort of?

- also like paige being like drew stop and him listening have they talked abt azzi at all since their breakup or is like a we don’t talk abt that kinda deal?

- on a similar drew note im curious as his reaction to paige telling him she’s getting a divorce with ms cunt??? was he like told u so or more symptomatic?

- ALSO OKAYYYY DREW NBA I SEE U!!! question is can he finally beat Paige 1v1

- honestly thinking back on this whole chapter i don’t have a lot of questions more just overall like waiting for everything to unfold

-as always ily!

🤩🤩

Bestieeeee hi <3

- Personally I would love if you could no throw yourself off of anything because I don't want you to die!

- Azzi just likes to make life complicated apparently cause you're so right

- Yep yep yep, it's exactly about that. We all knew that was gonna come back and here we are.

- Stephie knows exactly where to twist the dagger lmao

- Yeah I'm ngl writing the Drew angst has been the saddest I've been writing this fic just cause like he really was just collateral damage and he didn't deserve it

- Drew is mainly mad at Azzi but he's also against the idea of them getting back together because he doesn't trust her to not hurt Paige again.

- LMAO every time you call her Ms. Cunt I giggle but he was definitely just relieved cause he knew Paige's heart wasn't in it.

[wyldblunt]

hi personal post just under a cut, it's not even serious or negative or anything i just feel like blabbering and it's embarrassing to have it out in the open lol

i NEED......... to get over how shy i am abt playing w ppl in game... it's not even just Running Content, i mean i get anxious/shy about even just. goofing around aimlessly/map completing with anyone i haven't known for literally years. or who i am not literally married to.

idk what it is!!! my brain immediately kicks into overdrive and gets completely clogged up with "am i not talking enough. are they getting bored. am i moving too fast/slow. i don't know what to do. this is stressing me out" and i have zero idea how to stop myself from getting like that. literally yesterday (SORRY IF THIS WAS YOU??? I THOUGHT YOU WERE NICE FWIW) someone came up to me and marina in game and said hi nicely and asked what we were up to and i like. Answered Once, and then did not talk again the whole time, and we sort of ran around together for a bit until i kind of lost track of them but the ENTIRE TIME i was agonizing over "am i being totally unfriendly and weird by not chatting. am i coming off like i want them to go away or just generally like an asshole" and as you can see i am also still agonizing about it now. even though objectively it was probably completely fine.

and EVEN WITH very good friends i've known for a long time i clam up like that... when i was trying to get into ffxiv some very good friends stopped by to give me stuff/say hi to my character etc and i got the exact same way!!! ppl i literally talk to all the time on twitter etc but then the second we're behind in game avatars i just get stressed out and start feeling super awkward and aside from like. jumping in place a few times suddenly forget literally every single thing i have ever known about human socialization

but it's dumb!!! and i'm so over it!!!! i wanna run dungeons and fractals and stuff, i even wanna scrape a group together to kind of activate my old guild again and claim a guild hall, stuff like that... and i KNOW the tumblr community is a great way to do that bc u guys are all so friendly and chill and it's way better than trying to throw myself into pugs or whatever. but oh my god. my fucking BRAIN, man

as i type this all out i do wonder if maybe a solution would be getting on voice chat w ppl while trying to play stuff together bc i truly feel like 90% of my anxiety comes from "i cannot type in chat and play at the same time, therefore i get super overwhelmed and confused about how to communicate naturally" and i feel like vc would solve that. but uh. if anyone does not mind sometimes running content with a guy who will probably be mostly silent and weird the whole time (the real glyndwr experience!!!!) please feel free to hit me up and i will get back to u between three and six billion business days

EDIT adding on more bc im still thinking lol. i just have a huge huge fear of coming off like a dick or like im unfriendly or something. ppl have constantly told me im intimidating for ages and it hurts my feelings and i get really antsy about it (this is why i never play reblog games abt like "rate how intimidating the person u reblogged from is" etc bc if anyone actually said they were scared of me i would get sad for real lol!!!). i naturally usually have a kind of flat/dry affect online and i make friends slowly, and i don't feel like changing how i express myself bc it's natural to me but. agh!!!! agh!!!! my wittle feelings!!!!!!

[emeritus-fuckers]

hello i was wondering if i could participate in the match up event?

I am afab and nb, I use any pronouns :) I'm cool with being any gender or being with any gender neither matters much to me

I lov the ghouls and their silly little shenanigans :)

I'm pretty feminine looking, I'm 5'1 and I'm built like a comic book male superhero like broad chest and shoulders but a straight line from the ribs down like a upside down dorito w legs

I'm asian so my eyes and hair are dark, my hair's like a shoulder-length wolf cut ish thing... idk I just hack at it. sometimes I wear glasses, but sometimes I just feel like being blind. When I get dressed I pretend like im dressing up in a fun little costume so my day is more whimsical and silly my go-to is like sailor uranus prince-type girl crush but a wizard or a wizard who is going on an epic expedition to recover lost artifacts but no matter the outfit the key is that I look like I'm secretly a merlin-style cartoonishly evil wizard. So i guess maybe like goth grunge academia something something pinterest buzzword Oh and I have major rbf, and it makes ppl scared of me

I'm an introverted person and I tend to be very logical but. I think different from a lot of ppl apparently. I've been described, to paraphrase, as "sort of ominous and mysterious but actually funny", "uncanny and unsettling in a good way", and "awkward and weird but its endearing" which just sound like insults. I like to live in my head and make silly stories and things to play with. Like every tumblr user I've got fucked up mental health and bad parents so I am kind of like one of those freaky ass chihuahuas that is always scared and shakes and bites people and has digestive issues. I tend to be hard to read or sort of deadpan so I like fucking w people since they can't tell if I'm joking bc i love mischeif and japes. I want to be a silly not-quite-supervillain like Dr doofinshmirtz or like a trickster archetype sort yk

I was a pretty intense synchronized swimmer for like 9 years I competed at like opens and nationals and all that when I was in school but my university doesn't have :( I'm on the rowing team now but I would rather do synchro esp since being my main thing was being flexible and it has no advantages in rowing lmaooo I've been a huge vocaloid fan since elementary school so I've been around in that community for a while (I am so well-adjusted). I like to make vocal synth covers and draw, especially when I'm able to work with producers to provide art for their vids it's so cool hehehehhe I mostly listen to vocaloid music but I like a lot of metal stuff as well that's how I found out abt gonst. I also like 2 play video gamez, I'm so fucking bad at them but I think it's rly funny so I just spend hours giggling and watching myself get mauled over and over.

I love horror a lot but I'm less a slasher girlie and more of a supernatural psychological tormet girlie esp if its got mythology or religions shit involved. Im majoring in history bc all good history ppl like silly metal and I wrote this instead of my abstract that's due in like an hour bc I have no idea what to do for the topic 🥲🥲

- the fuckin wizard

This post is part of the 1000 followers match up event. Entries for the event are now closed.

Your match is... Zephyr

They like listening to you talk about your major and interests. He's a very good listener.

While they might not be the best swimmer, they enjoy the activity and if you want to show off, they'll absolutely let you and be super proud.

He doesn't mind how unique your style is. He probably wouldn't really try to match clothes with you, but they'd try their best to buy you stuff you'd enjoy.

Since he doesn't really walk much, they picked up drawing and started doing it with you. They're surprisingly good at it for someone who just randomly said "I'm bored, maybe I should start drawing".

Also, horror movie date nights! They're also much more of a psychological horror person, but his favorite is of course the paranormal (he finds it hilarious) so you two take turns picking the movies.

Video game dates included, too. He's got a PS3 and the first three Uncharted games, as well as some others. Their favorite is Uncharted 3.

He'll insist you wear your glasses. He knows the consequences of ignoring his health. It's not fun.

~

Written by Nosferatu with the help of the wonderful and of @ask-zephyr-ghoul (ilysm pookie).

[torialefay]

It’s so hard to know how to think about this stuff. For context I am on the side of Palestine in this horrific nearly year-long massacre… I don’t think companies should have policies disallowing folks from speaking their povs would be thing A in my mind rn. Thing B is that making the genocide skz/Chris’ problem is unfair when they cannot control this and…. Are people coming at other groups or is it just skz bc they’re a hot topic or bc that’s the major crowd im in?? Like if you’re gonna demand it let’s demand it of the industry and not put all the pressure on one man… I understand wanting celebs to take a stance though, to encourage the rest of us to do so as well. I think it would be the right and best thing to do. However thing C coming off of that point is… even I am scared of losing my job if i speak out. I work as a receptionist and i would lose my job and my livelihood if I started talking to patients walking into the clinic about my personal views and especially abt something so heated. I’m not saying it’s right but I’m saying to try and put yourself in his shoes… there are many incredible and brave activists who have no doubt risked so much more than just their 9 to 5 but for many of us it is not something we can risk or even something we want to risk… idk i feel like people try to make celebs act like politicians. I do think they should speak up but i don’t necessarily fault someone who finally reached their passion career goals if they are contractually obligated to stay quiet and they don’t want to lose what they’ve built for themselves. I feel like i could keep going but it would sound insane and rambly… idk…

i appreciate hearing your views honey 🫶🏼

i think what we can all agree on is that idols should be allowed to speak on whatever they deem is morally ethical & could be helpful in some way. the murder of tens of thousands of people & destroying the lives of millions more is inexcusable. i hope that in the future, the companies can undergo reform & that idols will have the right to speak out on these things. but at the end of the day, it is kpop... which hasn't really been known for it's ethical or authentic practices 🫠

friends, this is the last ask i'm gonna post/answer. pls know that i've read your messages & they are very kind. again, anon just misunderstood what i was talking about, so pretty please no hate toward them & any hate won't be posted. let's all do better okay love yall tho 🫶🏼

[nereidprinc3ss]

hi! i was wondering if i could ask for some writing advice? (pls feel free to ignore this if you'd like!) so i've posted a couple of fics that have done really well, which i'm super pumped about. but now i'm scared to keep posting bc i don't want my newer fics to flop. idk if this makes sense at all or if you've gone through a similar thing before, but if you have what were ways that you tried to get out of this mindset? thanks in advance and i absolutely love your writing <3

hiiiii so i did go through a similar thing!!!! i will elaborate below

(WARNING ⚠️ most diabolical yapper of all time has access to a keyboard😰😰😰)

ok so my number one thing is that you should be writing because you truly love to do it. i see a lot of people frustrated with lack of likes or comments or reblogs etc and i do understand that but if you’re solely writing for engagement people will be able to tell and you likely won’t find the numbers you want and it won’t be worth it. like yes the big numbers are really nice but (sorry we’re going to talk about me now ik im insufferable) i was writing long ass stories that were never posted and will never see the light of day for years before i ever started posting on tumblr. i write fanfic because i love to write. i adore my silly little bf spencer reid but the actual writing part is the most important aspect to me. i wrote stories before i knew what fanfiction was, i wrote before i watched criminal minds, and i will continue to write after. that said i think the reason that fanfic works well as a medium for me is because im also really truly interested in the character of spencer reid from a writing perspective. like i wanna get all up inside his brain cause he fascinates me, and that leads to me writing him in the hopes of discovering something new about him as a character, not just cause i wanna smash (but i do wanna smash!!) and all of that is basically how i stay out of the numbers mindset

so yeah i will reiterate that the most important part of creating something that feels lasting rather than just a phase or whatever is a love for the art form and not just the desire for engagement!!!! like write for FUN!!!! you do not have to be as pretentious as me btw u can literally just write cause it sounds fun at the moment like u don’t have to have some mission of highfalutin soul quest fulfillment or something to write spencer reid fanfic quite honestly im talking out of my ass rn and this was probably entirely unhelpful BUT i never claimed to be helpful (but i still hope it helped in the slightest omg i just read it back and wtf am i talking abt im sorry ily)