#idk fucked with the vibe and set up but the plot lost me

[vilelittlecritter]

About half the reblogs are about 73 yards and I'm sorry to break it to you but I don't really like 73 yards that much..

No hate to the episode I thought it was cool as an idea but wasn't really well done in my opinion

Firm believer that doctor who should get fucked up and unnerving on the regular

[luvacookie]

mr steal ur girl.

eren notices an unfamiliar face at one of his frat parties…

❥ warnings : reiner bein a dick, unprotected sex (wrap before u tap), nicknames, squirting, porn w a plot, intended use of lower case, mildly proof read, shy-ish reader, black fem coded.

❥ cookie for ur thoughts ? : my first post, my first aot idea >~< ! idk how people will respond to this. i need to write a lil sum sum for con, i will work on it…

“pleaseee ! you never come out with me! plus you get to be around reiner.”

pieck stared at you through the floor length mirror, adjusting her black skin tight dress as you ignored her and continued to scroll through your phone. as per usual, she was going to one of her parties hosted by her friends and as per usual she was asking you to join her.

normally you declined, opting to stay wrapped up in bed, catching up on one of your hour long k-dramas episodes or looking over work you did in a lecture.

parties were not your scene and they never had been.

“pieck… i don’t know…” you responded sceptically, curling the end of your braid around your finger.

“i can set you up with reiner, he talks about you all the time you know,” pieck said walking over to your bed.

you sighed, you knew she was just using your delusional crush on reiner to lure you in and unfortunately it was working.

you pushed your glasses up, exhaling defeatedly. pieck smiled and clapped her hands together, jumping up from the bed.

“we have to make sure you look cute as fuck so shower, skincare, makeup, whatever you need to do and by time you get out i’ll have a cute fit for you!” she said happily, digging through your clothes.

you hauled yourself out of bed, grabbing your towel and headed to the shower. you cleaned up nicely, freshening yourself up for the party. you put your braids into a half-up half-down with a side parting, laying your edges with a decorative heart.

pieck had picked out a two piece pink set for you with white string heels, you matched your accessories accordingly with pink hair clips and white glasses.

she smiled at you in awe. “you look so fuckin’ good right now! you seriously need to get out more.”

you looked down shyly, “are you sure pie’? this is so out of my zone.”

“oh my god, of course i’m sure, now come on. reiner won’t wait all night,” she giggled.

she grabbed you by the hand and dragged you to her convertible, making sure to let the top down so the warm night air hit your faces. the ride there was filled with vibes and giggles, your nerves slowly disappearing.

soon enough you arrived at the frat house, the musics blaring through all the open doors and windows. people were dancing on the lawn, cars pulled up in every direction. pieck dragged you through the crowd, stopping for a couple seconds at a time to say hi to her mutuals.

soon enough you found your way into the kitchen with her where the rest of your friend group was.

“hey guys!” pieck called out over the music and they all greeted her back.

“no fuckin’ way you brought y/n,” connie said, licking his paper and putting the blunt behind his ear.

you waved at him, smiling lightly.

“well damn, who woulda thought,” annie said from beside him, holding a red solo cup.

“she finally managed to convince me soooo…” you trailed off leaning against the counter.

“you look hot though,” sasha commented, a lazy smile on her face as if she was already high.

“mmm, cheers to that,” reiner said from behind you.

you turned around, looking him up and down. he had a simple white tee on that hugged his arms perfectly, a pair of black cargo’s with a silver chain. he handed you a cup and knocked it with yours, tipping the contents of it back.

you stared at him briefly, watching his throat move as he swallowed. you followed shortly after, pulling a face as the liquor burned your throat.

everyone spoke amongst themselves, pieck catching up on all the lost drinks, leaving you and reiner to have a sweet conversation.

“why don’t i see you out enough?” he asked, looking down at you.

you turned your head to the side, the eye contact making your stomach flip, “not really my thing.”

“they should be,” he followed up quickly, “you’re too pretty to be kept hostage in your dorm.”

you looked at him, smiling. “thanks.”

“no problem sweetheart,” he poured himself another drink, refilling yours too.

“you drink a lot?” he asked, sipping on his mix.

“not really, only when i come to these things, which is basically never,” you chuckled lightly, tasting your drink.

“i’m gonna have to force pieck to bring you out more, you’re too fuckin’ pretty darling.”

“rei, stop you’re making me feel shy,” you sighed, looking at him with obvious heart eyes.

he made a noise in his throat, a cocky smirk on his face. “dance with me?”

you stared, your brain slowly registering before you nodded. you turned to pieck, gesturing that you were going with reiner and she gave you a massive thumbs up in encouragement.

reiner took your hand in his and lead you to where the music was the loudest, putting your hands around his neck as his met your waist. he stayed with you like that for the majority of the song, his eyes holding yours.

your acrylics danced at the nape of his neck, as the grip on your waist slowly became tighter. he pulled you close enough for your chests to be touching, forcing you to look up at his height.

“are you even listening ? hellooo?”

“yeah..yeah, who’s that?” eren asked, ignoring whatever armin was saying.

armin looked around, “who?”

“her,” eren said, nodding in your direction.

“oh, y/n l/n. she’s in my english major,” armin said dismissively.

eren nodded, watching how you were slowly grinding on reiner, or realistically how your tits were moving in your dress. he had never seen you before, so how did you know reiner of all people?

as the song ended you pulled reiner down to your height, muttering something to him in which he nodded. you left the room, leaving reiner to join one of his other group of friends, though he didn’t see where you left to as porco joined him and armin.

you returned to the kitchen where connie was left on his own, tapping the ash off his blunt into the sink.

“you and reiner?” he asked, his words slightly slowed.

you poured a shot, smiling to yourself. “maybe. i don’t know.”

you tipped it back as he continued talking to you. “he likes you, you know that right?”

you reapplied your lipgloss, “does he?”

“for real, he talks about you all the time,” he inhaled slowly.

“that’s cute. i like him too,” you smiled at connie.

he exhaled and turned the roll to you, “you smoke?”

“no… i’ve only hit once before,” you admitted, staring at it.

“you don’t wanna hit that shit, probably laced,” came a deep voice from behind you.

you turned to see eren leaning on the door frame, staring at you. he was wearing simple grey sweats and a white tee, his hair pulled back into a messy bun.

“fuck off yaeger,” connie muttered, rolling his eyes, smoke exhaling his mouth with a string of cusses following.

he ignored connie, focusing his attention on you. “you’ve never been to one of these before have you?”

“do i stand out that bad?” you shook your head, the sound of your acrylic tapping the glass following.

eren walked round the counter, pouring himself straight whiskey. “oh you stand out… would’ve remembered your face.”

you tip your head to the side and glance back at connie who stares at you blankly. “what’s that supposed to mean?”

“means your cute, your boyfriend is lucky,” he comments swiftly.

“my boyfriend ?” you question, toying with the curly end of your braid.

“reiner. i would think so anyways after the way you were dancing with him,” he responds, a glint in his eye as if he was digging for information.

you look up and make eye contact with him. “he’s not my boyfriend—”

“not yet anyways,” connie interrupts.

you felt your face flush, unsure if you had turned a shade of red or not. you shook your head and had another shaky shot, the alcohol seeping it’s way into your bloodstream.

“what’s your name ?” eren asks, sipping vodka straight from the bottle that was left on the counter.

“y/n,” you responded. “don’t worry, i know who you are eren.”

he tipped his head to the side slightly, he liked the way you said his name.

he hummed, continuing his drink when his friend armin entered the room.

“are reiner and annie fucking or something ?” he asks, a twinge of annoyance in his tone.

you turned to look at armin, your heart slightly dropping. “what do you mean ?”

armin looks at you as if he hadn’t registered you were in the room, “n-nothing. just the way they were talkin’ and dancing and shit..”

you were sure you felt your heart drop this time. annie and reiner ? they had never gave an indication that they liked each other.

you looked off to the side, your throat slowly going dry.

connie noticed and sighed. “they like siblings, don’t stress it.”

you nodded, “y-yeah of course, i just need some air or something.”

you used that as your cue to leave, eren’s eyes following your figure as you walked past him towards the back garden.

you were slightly embarrassed, choking up in front of three boys, two of them you barley knew. you sat on a chair in the corner, taking a shallow breath and texting pieck.

y/n : i think i’m ready to cut pie

pie 🙇🏾‍♀️💓 : y ? e oksy?

you looked at her message and knew she was drunk, yet she still tried her best to check in on you.

y/n : yh dw abt me imma jus take an uber or smthin

pie 🙇🏾‍♀️💓 : olay

pie 🙇🏾‍♀️💓 : grt home sfe iky <3333

you sighed and turned your phone off, looking at the people in the garden. you heard giggling and saw reiner and annie trip over one another, clearly having a good time with themselves.

you turned your phone on and scrolled through your missed texts when you felt a person stood behind you. you looked up and saw eren’s green eyes looking at annie and reiner.

“what a prick,” eren sighed, looking down to meet your eyes.

“it’s cool. annie’s better than me by like tenfold so i’m not really shocked,” you responded, dropping your phone in your lap.

“don’t be fuckin’ dumb, reiner’s a blind asshole. he always has been,” he comforted you. “here.”

he handed you his lit joint and you took a hesitant hit, careful not to get lipgloss all over the paper.

eren watched you as you exhaled into the air, swallowing nothing. “you good?”

you nodded, “ ‘m good.”

you guys stayed like that for a while, exchanging useless comments and smoking. eren was glad that your mood had been lifted. at some point you had ended up back in the kitchen with your group of friends, high and definitely drunk.

pieck had everyone do body shots off of her stomach and made you dance round the counter like an idiot, something you were too drunk to question.

“where’d you go?” reiner’s voice said from behind you, his arms wrapping around your shoulders.

you tensed uncomfortably, though reiner was far too gone to notice. you wriggled out of his grasp, turning around to look at him. “s-sorry, i ended up getting distracted by eren and connie.”

eren nodded at whatever words mikasa was saying, his eyes focusing on the way reiner was forcing a conversation after abandoning you to fuck around with annie.

“yaeger? what were you doing with that bastard ?” reiner said, ignoring the way you rubbed your arm rather nervously.

“n-nothing, we was jus’ talking and shi—”

“fuck that, don’t hang around with that kid,” reiner cut you off, staring at you rather annoyed.

“reiner, i’m sorry he just—”

“why shouldn’t she hang around with me ? i’d say i’m a pretty fun time,” eren said lazily, sitting on the counter beside you.

reiner glared at him, “don’t start your bullshit with me yaeger.”

“i’d say you’re starting problems with me braun, tellin’ pretty girls they should steer clear,” he responded.

eren looked unbothered whereas reiner had become rather agitated.

he ignored reiner, turning to you, “wanna go some where else ?”

you looked at reiner then at eren before nodding, following his lead and taking his hand as he lead you somewhere else.

“fuckin’ hell. rei just got his bitch stolen by yaeger,” porco muttered, reiner still heard it.

“you good princess?” eren mumbled, the sound of his door clicking shut.

“mhm, thank you,” you responded from his desk, untying your heels as he pushed himself up on his bed.

“for what?” he asked pointedly, his eyes locking with yours.

“the reiner thing—”

“anybody with working brain cells could see that you were uncomfortable, i was just helping out,” he dismissed, his hands resting behind his head.

you nodded, holding eye contact with him. the room went silent, the only sound being the tapping of your acrylics against the wood of his desk.

eren sighed, patting the cover of his bedsheets. “c’mere, you too far away.”

you let out a little laugh, hopping off his desk and standing in front of him. he grabbed you by your hands and pulled you on top of him, settling yourself on his hips. he was less than bother by the sudden added weight of your own body, his hands meeting the side of your thighs.

“you really are mad pretty,” he mumbled, squeezing the fat of your thighs that was closer to your ass.

you exhaled, turning your head to try and hide your smile. he grabbed your face and turned it back to him, his eyes hooded with lust.

you stared at him and your eyes dropped to his lips and unfortunately for you, he didn’t miss it. you took a deep breath and leaned forward, encasing eren’s lips in yours.

his hands instantly moved to your ass, squeezing roughly. he kissed you back hard, pushing his hips upwards.

your hands travelled to the back of his hair, your acrylics burying themselves in the nape of his neck. he sat up properly so he could flip you over, a shear display of his strength.

he bit at the bottom of your lip, taking advantage of the whine you let out to slip his tongue into your mouth. his hands wondered down the front of your top, though he pulled away, inspecting your face.

“why’d you stop ?” you mumbled, your eyes darting towards his swollen lips.

“nothin’, just checking to see if you’re actually sober. you alright with this though ?” he asked and you nodded eagerly, tugging at his hoodie.

he laughed. “you’re a desperate thing aren’t you.”

“eren, please,” you mumbled, pulling him forwards with more force.

“fuck. whatever you want princess,” he groaned, grabbing you by the neck and pulling you into a deeper kiss than before.

you moaned quietly as he untied the front of your shirt, revealing your lacy white bra.

“please tell me you weren’t wearing this for reiner,” he begged, rubbing on your tits.

you shook your head. “thank fuck for that.”

he pulled your skirt off, revealing your matching set, throwing the skirt somewhere in his room.

“fuck sake, y/n,” he muttered, eyes trailing the whole of your body.

you tugged at his zipper, “off, i want it off.”

he unzipped his hoodie with a chuckle, removing his shirt too, revealing his muscles. “makin’ demands now ?”

you rolled your eyes and pulled him back in for another heated kiss, your hands trailing down his body and palming his dick through his grey bottoms. he groaned, kissing you harder as you continued to stroke his growing hard-on through the material.

he pulled away and began kissing down your neck, leaving deep hickies as he went down, kissing all the way down your stomach till he got to the top of your lace thong.

he made eye contact with you as he placed a light kiss on your cover clit, watching as your mouth slightly dropped open. he pulled your panties down, stuffing them in his pocket whilst he rubbed on your clit with slow circles.

“you’re so fuckin’ wet for me right now angel. did you know that?” he asked, continuing with his agonisingly slow circles.

“mm fuck, eren, please—” you whined, your hands gripping his sheets.

“please what princess?” he teased, watching your body squirm under his touch.

you whined even louder. “fuck, i want more—” you cut yourself off with a shallow moan as he dipped his middle finger inside of you briefly before pulling it out.

“more what?” he teased.

you looked at him with round glossy eyes, “please eat me out.”

“that’s all you had to say princess,” he laughed, finally giving you what you wanted.

his tongue made contact with your clit and he licked eagerly, making his middle and ring finger stretch you out nicely.

“gotta make sure this pretty pussy is ready for my dick hm,” he mumbled on your clit, sucking on it roughly.

you babbled incoherent sentences, scratching as far as your hands could reach down his shoulders. your moans gradually increased in volume as his slender fingers worked your insides deliciously, finding that soft spot your own couldn’t reach with ease.

“f-fuck eren— feels so fuckin’ good,” you moaned gripping on his sheets harder.

just as you could feel your orgasm approaching, you could feel your phone vibrate beside you.

pieck was calling you, your thighs began to close but eren forced them back open. “answer it.”

“b-but—”

“i said answer it and be quiet.”

you looked at him before doing as he said, his fingers working harder than before.

“y/nnnn! where did you gooooo?” pieck shouted down the phone.

“i-i went with— mm-fuck, eren—” you struggled, pulling at eren’s hand.

“to do whatttt? you guys are missing the party” she yelled, giggling shortly after.

you struggled to hold back a moan as eren sucked more feverishly on your clit, “ ‘m s-sorry pie’, w-we’ll be — fuckfuck— we’ll be b-back soon.”

pieck stayed silent on the other side for a moment. “ohmygodyouanderenarefucking?!”

eren laughed, the vibrations on your clit causing you to let a loud whine slip past your mouth, one pieck definitely heard.

“OHMYGOD YOU ARE! GUYSGUYS EREN AND Y/N ARE—”

you hung up on her and threw your phone on the floor some where, focusing back on eren. “that is y-your fault.”

he pulled up and looked at you, the lower half of his face covered in your slick. “i told you to be quiet princess.”

you rolled your eyes as he continued finger fucking you, his tongue slipping to your hole every now and again.

a strange feeling built up in your stomach, making you push him away by his shoulders. “mm— eren wait, f-feels like ‘m gonna—”

his dick twitched at the thought of you squirting from him eating your pussy, so he pushed your hands away. “stop, let me finish.”

“no— eren—”

he grabbed your arms with his free hand and held them to your side, licking at your clit more needly as he could feel your cunt clenching around his fingers. “i got you princess.”

you moaned loudly and the clear liquid drenched your thighs and his sheets, eren’s fingers still working you through your orgasm.

“f-fuck, eren— please—” you moaned desperately, tears sliding down the side of your face as you tried to squeeze your thighs shut.

“give me one more, i know you can y/n,” he mumbled, pulling your thighs open as his fingers working faster, grazing your soft spot every time.

you shook your head, feeling your second orgasm approaching harder than the first one.

“fuckfuckfuck, eren please—” you came around his fingers a second time, moaning loudly.

“there you fucking go,” eren smirked, feeling your cunt squeeze him. he slipped his fingers out and kissed your clit gently before coming back up to kiss you.

“you okay princess?” he asked quietly, looking you in your eyes.

you nodded lazily, fucked out from the two orgasms he gave you. “ ‘m good.”

“good cause i’m not done with you yet,” he exhaled, kissing you again.

he pulled his bottoms down, revealing his white calvin klein boxers that hugged his straining dick.

“this is your fault,” he said mimicking the words you said to him earlier.

you ignored him and palmed at his dick, feeling it twitch under the contact. you pulled his boxers down and let it free, continuing to rub it bare.

“fuckk—” he groaned, “shit, let me get a condom—”

“i’m clean,” you interjected, “and on birth control.”

eren looked slightly taken back. “are you sure ?”

you nodded desperately, “i need you please—”

“well shit. i’m clean too don’t worry,” he reassured you.

you nodded and continued rubbing his dick.

he moaned lowly before grabbing your face, “open.”

you opened your mouth and he stuck his fingers down your throat, the same ones that had been inside you.

he pulled them out and rubbed them on his dick, mixing your spit and his pre-cum.

next time i’ll have to get head, he thinks to himself before lining his dick up with your cunt. you moan loudly as the tip slowly pushed past your pillowy walls, hugging eren tightly.

“shit—” eren cussed as he felt your nails dig into his bicep, “you’re never fuckin’ getting rid of me princess.”

he bottomed out, making you whimper. he stilled, allowing you to adjust to his length. he watched your face for any signs of discomfort before slowly moving in and out of your cunt.

“fuck eren— you feel- so good—” you babbled incoherently, clawing deep marks down his back.

he nodded, lifting your leg to put it over his shoulder to get a better angle. he increased his speed, rubbing at your clit, making you squeeze his cock.

his hips stuttered. “stop doing that, gonna make me cum.”

“i want you to cum in me though,” you said, looking at him through your lashes.

eren scoffed and went deeper, thanks to the angle his tip kept assaulting your sweet spot.

you whimpered, “fuck eren— gonna cum—”

“no you’re not. hold it,” he grunted, gripping your hips and pulling you down to meet his base.

“eren,” you whined.

his pacing slowed down, his thrusts becoming sloppier as he neared his high.

“fuck— princess, i’m gonna cum—” he muttered into your ankle, nibbling slightly.

you squeezed around him at the sensations. he let out a deep moan, his cum painting the insides of your pussy white.

you came as you felt him empty inside of you, digging a crescent shape into his back.

“f-fuck,” you mumbled, watching him pull his dick out.

you whined at the empty feeling, though eren chose to ignore it. “imma be back.”

he picked his boxers up from the floor and pulled them on, walking to his bathroom. he walked out with a warm cloth, gently wiping the insides of your thigh.

“is your back okay? i noticed all the scratches and some were kinda bleeding…” you said sympathetically.

“don’t worry about me, i’ve had worse,” he smiled.

when he finished he put it on his desk and walked back over to you, kissing you gently.

“you good princess?”

you nodded dazed, causing eren to chuckle. he pulled you up and helped you get dressed, allowing you to fix your makeup and hair.

when you left his bedroom the party was still full swing, people dancing and drinking.

“ayeee ! there they are,” porco called out, clapping eren on the back when he sat next to him.

you were about to walk off to sit with pieck and sasha when eren grabbed your hand and pulled you into his lap.

you looked at him confused when he muttered in your ear. “didn’t i tell you you’re never getting rid of me ?”

you were sure this time you were blushing, especially when he kissed the dark hickey on your neck.

“alright, we get it, you fucked, get a room,” sasha fake gagged, giggling after.

eren made eye contact with reiner. “she won’t be able to walk next time we get a room.”

[phobos-exe]

i love deadpool and wolverine as much as the next guy, will forever continue to praise it and never shut up about it until the hyperfixation dopamine wears off by the end of the month, but there is one thing about the movie i don't really vibe with in hindsight.

spoilers!!

namely how the film kinda lost sight of the main plot after the first half an hour (give or take). the overarching story of deadpool having to save his family and universe from destabalizing and ceasing to exist, and how wolverine's death had a great deal to do with it. its supposed to set up the stakes of the entire movie and be the driving force of it all, but i shame this movie for never showing it. we are only told that it will happen. thus that entire narritive, for me, gets outshined by the entire middle and climax with the gratuitous cameos, the fucking fighting, the big emotional moments.

so the entire time you kinda don't care as much as you should for these people who are apperently about to die along with their reality. they only ever appear in the beginning and at the very end, with really short flashbacks and cameos sprinkled in between. or at the very least the lack of urgency presented to the viewer (not mentioned by the characters) doesn´t bode well for making the main plot enticing, you tend to be more invested in whats happening moment for moment and the b-plot surrounding cassandra nova than what wade and logan are actually fighting for in the long run.

i think what could have saved it in my eyes would be to include the original supporting cast more, have some sort way for them to interact with dp and wolverine even if they are extremely physically apart the entire time, or better yet some relevant excuse to actually show what's going on in their reality. we revisit wade's earth for the iconic deadpool variant fight but nothing seems wrong in it other than the tva/cassandra nova trying to destroy it for reasons.

it kinda reminds me about how ryan was continuously bouncing ideas for this movie hoping something would work for years, then when hugh signed on still bouncing ideas for a team up story. which idk could be a contributing factor to what i think sucked about the story.

[readingwiththestars]

₊˚⊹♡ RECKLESS

["it's a good thing you're not here, because i still havent found my courage."]

| ✮ 4.5 stars |

THOUGHTS ° ᡣ𐭩 . ° . [spoilers ahead]

okayyy let me just start off with WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK WAS THAT ENDING LAUREN???? i'm not okay because of it. like nuh uh get lost. u had no right to do that (im saying this as if it didnt get spoiled for me and i didnt gaslight myself the entire book read that it wasn't going to happen)

i would like to straight up say this seemed like a filler book. just a set up for the next one, it didn't really have all too much plot-wise aside from pae and kai's romance. it was less on the fantasy side and more on the romance but i still enjoyed it a lot. and obviously since it was a filler book there was less character development (for some- im looking at you paedyn)

kai and pae were really cute in this book honestly (and as it mostly focuses on the romance ofc they were) the banter and everything was so wonderful to read i was giggling and kicking my feet wayyy to much. the romance was romancing but also not romancing at the same time (im not even gonna try to explain that just use vibes)

i do feel as though lauren's writing has definitely improved from powerless. she has this whimsical magical style of writing that i love it really takes me into the world of the book (mostly). other times the long sentences were too much in moments. like lauren. we did not need to know the colour of the bricks in the market at this certain moment in time when you'd already explained the colour two pages ago-

CHARACTERS ° ᡣ𐭩 . ° .

paedyn - ok i love her. i really do she's such a good fmc BUT for me in this book she was boring-ish. and hella indecisive like girly pop if i had kai talking to me like that i'd be folding so damn fast- but yeah it felt like she didn't have too much character development aside from finding out her dad was actually her dad. also i idk who the fuck she was trying to fool with her 'i hate you' to kai, like be fucking for real bitch no you dont.

kai - ok bye i could write a whole rant on why i love this man. like im sat. this book felt more like kai's book (as powerless felt like pae's) imo we got more on his backstory and i think his character (and povs) were more interesting for me to focus on. also his flirting and little one liners had me giggling and shit my sister actually woke up to me grinning like an idiot under torch light-

kitt - bye idek why i made this section for him. this is going to entirely be hate fr. OKAY WE GET IT DUDE UR A GHOST WHATEVER. OH MY GOSH U MISS UR DAD BUT IN THE NEXT POV U DONT LIKE BITCH CHOOSE A SIDE IDC ABT UR WHINY ASS. ALSO U CLEARLY HAVE AN OBSESSION WITH PAEDYN LIKE FUCKING HELL DUDE SHE IS UR 'MUSE' OR WHATEVER GET OVER YOURSELF. EUGH AND THEN PROPOSING TO HER?? YEAH SURE BUDDY "YOUR FEELINGS FOR HER DIED" MHM YUP OKAY TOTALLYYY *clears throat awkwardly* can you tell i hate him?

QUOTES ° ᡣ𐭩 . ° . [its like all kai... im not even sorry about it either]

"you are my proof of paradise." - kai

"call us even. call me crazy. i don't care. just... just call me yours." - kai

"under different curcumstances i promise you im much more fun tied up." - kai (WHEN I TELL YOU I SCREECHED AND STARED AT THE PAGE. MALAKAI AZER-)

"just pae and kai." - kai

"she was supposed to be my forever. now i'll watch her become someone else's. because the beast doesn't get the beauty." - kai

jahsdgj i can't wait for the next book hehe

[descendantofthesparrow]

Brutally honest thoughts on each character?

...*Each* character???? bruh thats so many, okay ill keep this short cuz im waiting for a haircut rn

well start with the vks cuz thats easy

Mal-started off strong and then just became...THE WORST, love hate relationship for her. shes my art block fix but also i hate her

Jay-i dont have strong opinions on him, he actually never stuck out to me other than 'obligatory jock dude of the friend group.' i wish i liked him more but im more attached to his fandom self over canon Jay

Evie-got boring after D1, i wish they let her keep her chemistry stuff, love her vibe but shes kinda boring to me. SHOULD'VE BEEN THE MC OVER MAL!!

Carlos- lots of lost potential with his tech stuff from the first book and movie. easily could've been an engineer or inventor but they just made him an animal lover and i got bored of that real quick.

Uma-my queen, my idol, can do no wrong i love her so much i WILL kill for her.

Harry-i love his dumbass so much YALL DONY EVEN KNOW I WANNA BITE HIM SO BAD

Gil-one of the few characters i felt actually...grew up? idk but hes one of the few characters were it actually feels like time passed for.

Dizzy-oooooooh honey, honey honey, sunshine baby, please, put the glue gun down.

Celia- they should've gone with her trailer persona. Her outfits are so bad and i wish she got better writing and designs, so much lost potential, also she should've been Jays pick.

Smee twins- why the fuck are they even here they had one line and no significance. also they should've had a Harry scene.

Aks

Ben-puppy boy, deserved to have doberman energy. got turned into a doormat by the writers and is unfairly hated.

Audrey-bitch queen, shes not a nice person and thats okay~ girlboss.

Chad- should've been the D3 villan they had that all set up in D2 with his weird ass attitude over Ben getting kidnapped on the isle.

Doug -....honestly gives me the ick, especially in D3, i HATE the long hair his actor had/has. gold is NOT his color and neither is pastel purple or green. he looked good in D1 but ICK for 2 and 3.

Jane- bby gurl, blue bird sweetheart. yeah she did some fucked up shit in D1 but she was an insecure 14 year old girl who got manipulated by Mal and other aks!!!

Lonnie- deserved so much better, shes Chinese why is she getting Japanese style stuff?!?! her plot in D2 didnt even do anything it just happened and no one cared and Jay just shoved his problems of girls playing roar onto her.

Beast- *inhale* i wanna kick his ass, and i could, lemme at him. how dare he force an entire kingdom on Ben at 16 when he didnt become king when he was 28(when he married Belle)

Belle- they took away her backbone, shes not Disney princess book worm and independent Belle. she just, lost the spark

FG- they turned her into a preschool teacher, GIVE ME MY OL COOKY FAIRY LADY BACK

Leah- *seething rage*

vk parents

Maleficent- fuckin love her, shes such a manipulative bitch and feels like a gone crazy version of a Maleficent made for kids. def not the mistress of all Evil but i love her nonetheless

EQ- shouldve been the head villain, SHE WAS THE FIRST DISNEY VILLAIN CMON! def not the same character from the animated movie but shes dramatic and sassy and i adore her.

Jafar- haha funny characature~ i wish he was more menacing like he had been. Jafar is not one of my fav villains so descendants jafar didnt exactly translate for me well.

Cruella- yeah they nailed her, no complaints about her. good design, good dialogue, good acting.

Hades- LEMME KICK HIS DEAD BEAT ASS, fucking 'daddy issues made you stronger' my butt. i hate his hair and honestly he doesnt fit the washed up punk design, he didnt deserve the speech at the end and didnt deserve to be forgiven by Mal.

Ursula- we only saw her tentacle and one line but she seemed spot on so yeah

Lady Tremaine- why the fuck was she nice in D3??? bitch is the EVIL stepmother.

Smee- spot on, i have words for his sons designs becuaee hes old not naturally white haired but hes chill, makes sense hed be a good parent, he never felt evil to me, just compliant

Facilier- such a vibe, his actor got him spot on, would've changed up his suit design but hes chill and i can see him being a family man(ignoring wicked world).

[uglyduckling339]

KY'S LIFE IS STRANGE DOUBLE EXPOSURE NONSENSE LIVEBLOG: The Tutorial

(spoilers under cut) (do not take this seriously lmfao this is me basically talking to myself) (this will make ZERO sense without playing the game or watching it btw)

um.. where do i start

firstly that fucking qr code is rhe genuine bane of my existance. i spent 7 minutes tryna get it to work for basically nothing.

also !! the settings menu was hella fucking confusing and i got lost tryna change the captions (skill issue on my part ngl)

anyways so intro to the game: music was ass and i was confused why the door was being shook so gently until Max Fucking Caulfield wandered in😭 10/10 shock value worked tho cuz i didnt think that she was breaking into a broken room until her face appeared on screen

Safi is very cutesy in both a physical manner and a personality manner but her jokes are so hit or miss lmao

Max caulfield stealing that toy and joking abt stealing stuff??? talk abt character growth

i fucking HATE THE NEW CAMERA ARGGGGGGGG i keep fucking up my pics

Hot take i think safi and max are equally sexy in this new game GOD DAMNN

nvm maybe not equal. i'd let safi hit so fast tbh ("boss"??)

ALSO !! HER REWIND GETTING REMOVED POST-STORM IS CANON !!!! *

i've been saying this since the trailers but max's voice sounds so fucking weird in this (and yeah ik its not THAT diff from the og voice, but something abt it is irking me and idk what) (no hate to hannah telle)

nobody:

this game: fun fact !! safi's mom is the principal of the school! her mom! safi's mother! mom! mother! safi's ! principal !

god shut the fuck up i get it bro

FLASHBACK SCENEE

Ik its not just me who thinks this but istg they musta refilmed these scenes cuz chloe and max both sound hella odd (maybe i am trippin tho)

CHLOE! HAUNTING! THE! NARRATIVE!

smooth cut between chloe and safi's voice 10/10

i know the fandom is gonna be in fucking shambles over those choices so i'm holding my opinions off until i form a bigger analysis on it

I don't hate Amanda but i do hate rhat the game is pushing her on us so hard **

Also reminder to check yalls texts!! theres no journal but half of the shit i've seen complanted abt is referenced in the texts/posts

Chloe and Max having issues long before rhe breakup is so nice to see tbh. i'm glad it wasn't just a one comment plot choice.

also the issues primarily stemming from Max's trauma and her need to run is so good i can't wait to yap abt it

god off topic i am fucking DREADING the fandom. im so worried abt us tbh

okay back to the game, I think Amanda is really nice but I'm not gonna romance her day one cuz idk how to feel abt her yet

okay theory time! i think if chloe was actually IN the game, she'd be with a band in the Turtle bar. seen in the pink twitter, chloe "performs". i think she'd totes pull up at perform at the bar (once again im not saying if i think its very likely or nah but its a cool idea at least)

ALSO VICTORIA CHASE IS ALIVE :DDD AND BESTIES WITH CHLOE???

i'm only using pink twitter to watch Chloe and Vic ngl idgaf abt nun u other hoes

did u all a HUGE favor and tested rhe other option w rhe bottle cap.

on that note do the candy not the bag

shit like ts makes me miss rewind :(

animal symbolism my beloved

i think thats all? OH WAIT okay so i actually love safi. she's so weird and cringe but in a subsitute teacher way. it's a vibe and i would romance her w Max if i was given a choice (im gonna get hate mail again for rhat comment arent i 💀😭)

so far i really don't hate rhe game. it's glitchy in ways rhat for 80$ it shouldn't be but so far i've only had one actual issue so i'm not too pressed abt it. (for me, Safi keeps jumping between visible and invisible during cut scenes.)

I think the in game music is fire, but the actual "songs" aren't allthat good. tbh tho thats a personal opinion lmfao

[shipping1addict]

Finished Outlaws just now and my initial thoughts are the following:

*Spoiler free section*

It was really refreshing, seeing someone not aligned with "the good guys". Because every protagonist somehow ends up playing some role in the skywalker saga.

The story wasn't something out of this world. Wasn't something BIG and important. It was a heist. But it was entertaining. The characters were great and interesting and have lots and lots of potential for future content.

I really liked the gameplay aspect of it. There were moments when I forgot what the main objective was for a quick second because I was so caught up in the side missions.

That said, this is not to be taken as a critique. Even the syndicate missions where so emmersive and had interesting plots, that you wouldn't even know they weren't part of the main quest.

The planets were AWESOME. The design, the feeling. The interactive opportunities popping up. The adventure of it all. You wouldn't even need to play a quest and could get lost in the wilds.

Also THE MUSIC. There were a lot of obvious sampled idk music theory don't kill be pls bits of known soundtracks from the movies. I'm quite certain that the main theme or at least a theme that was played a lot of the time was a mix of the mandalorian and fallen order.

And I wouldn't be me without stating the very obvious elephant in the room: there were some gay as-fuck scenes and vibes in this game.

Something I would love to see in future contents.

-

Before I dive into spoiler territory, I want to ad, that this game probably gets a lot of hate from the fandom and if you think about playing this game, don't listen to them.

I haven't touched any reviews or ratings, but I can already see people being overly critiqual because of Kay as a protagonist, because of the absence of Jedi or the focus on the empire or the rebellion.

But I tell you: this game is a great way to explore the galaxy as someone who has their own bagage. As someone only familiar with the world they grew up in. And there are lots and lots of references and dialogs that refer to the happenings in the movies.

You just need to look and listen. It's such an emmersive game and I would hate for it to get thrown onto the "too woke, not star wars enough" pile.

!!!SPOILER WARNING!!!

The fanservice of including Darth Vader in every single Game in some capacity is something expected by now and I kid you not: I laughed when he showed up.

Not something totally un-fitting for the story but I can see why ome people might have a problem with that.

I also liked how Kay couldn't even explain what was happening in that room. That shows how non-existent the knowledge of the force was during the reign of the empire.

The small detail of Han Solo in Jabbas Palace and Boba Fett - who you can see in one of those vents you crawl through - was very fitting.

With me basically going in blind into the game, it was a great way to pinpoint on where on the timeline it is set on.

[lesbianrobin]

I love young strangers but I'm caught up and I've read all your other stuff, do you have any fic recs? I love your fics so much :)

thank you!! if you haven't already read all of her stuff, i recommend everything written by my friend sarah @steveharrington!! her ao3 is birthdaycandles and literally everything she's ever written is an absolute banger. if you like my stuff you will Love her and if you've read all of my fics but not hers i think that is a travesty and you better get on that immediately.

some great under-appreciated fics of hers: run for your children, for your sisters and brothers (steve lucas and robin. that is literally all i have to say it's about STEVE LUCAS AND ROBIN why haven't you clicked yet), strung through the tether (THEE stobin platonic soulmate fic), & seriously slipping out of control (steve and robin beg eddie to give them impulsive trauma tattoos immediately after starcourt).

idk what ships/characters ur most into so i'm just gonna focus on recs that are gen/ship-lite and oneshots bc i feel like that's what most of my fics are? so if you like my fics hopefully you'll like these bc i think they are all wayyy better than my fics but with similar vibes dkvjfjcn.

windowsill is a story focusing on max's recovery after s4. steddie is there, but the story itself is really about max and her healing and finding herself in the wake of trauma, and i think everybody should read it because it's gorgeous.

similarly, no, i'm not afraid to disappear explores erica's trauma in the wake of s4, how it sets her apart from her friends, and how she uses D&D to work through some of that trauma. there is NOT enough erica-centric fic out there and this one really gives her all of the love and complexity and attention she deserves.

you can put it all on me, you can laugh and you can bleed is a classic Steve Harrington Gets The Care And Love He Needs After Getting The Living Shit Kicked Out Of Him fic, and it has multiple perspectives (including officer callahan who is a hoot) that create a rich picture and make it all feel real. it isn't just about steve, it's also about all of the kids, their fears and trauma in the immediate aftermath of s2, and it's so fucking precious. literally the cutest shit ever.

strange (but not a stranger) is a mike-centric fic set after s4 that like. single-handedly saved mike's character for me. like s1-2 mike was my BABY and s3 i was kinda eh about him and in s4 i felt like i barely recognized him but this fic reached right into my heart and said You Will Love Mike Wheeler Again He Is Still Your Baby. mike is so messy and angry and lost in this fic and he feels like a flesh and blood teenager who's been through a lot and i think this fic deserves So much more attention.

don't imagine you're too familiar is a s4 aftermath fic focused on robin, steve, dustin, and eddie. this fic Gets steve and robin they are soooo platonic soulmates coded in this (as they should be) and i love it. also some steddie. as a treat.

unlike the others on here, adventures in babysitting a psionic isn't a oneshot, it's 59k words and SO WORTH READING. it's about steve babysitting el in the space between s2 and s3. it's definitely canon divergent but it's not a huge Plot Deal it's mostly about el and steve building an incredibly sweet friendship, and they both get a lot of complexity, care, and emotional development that i love. their relationships with the other characters are also given attention and it's just like... so cozy and sweet. it's simply precious.

so that's it for now! sorry if the formatting of this was weird i'm on mobile dkcjdjc i hope you haven't already read all of these and thank you again for being so kind ab my fics!!

[slowdripsunrise]

jfc okay so i have forgotten/been too lazy to write up reveiws here i apparently havent updated since. lone women which is well. so ive read a shit ton since then so i'm going try my best to write up as much as i can in this post bc i don't want to just. stop and skip over stuff. so well. here we go. spoilers for various books under the cut, i'll tag them all !

first book i finished after i last updated was silver nitrate by silvia moreno-garcia. been a while but damn do i remember the fucking vibes. absolutely killer vibes and atmosphere, and the plot was fun and interesting; i do remember being a bit confused in one of the final scenes fighting the guy but it wasnt enough to take me out of the story. the characters felt real and i could feel their love of movies and maybe each other off the page, definitely recommend if you're looking for an atmospheric, creepy little book.

next (and i'll just group these together) i read the poppy war trilogy by r. f. kuang ! absolutely wonderful storytelling and the characters were interesting and loveable. i think that this story succeeds in being one of the few good "war stories" as in it doesn't glorify or make light of any aspects of the war. there are good moments and bright spots throughout, but in the end pretty much every single character we know and love ends up dead, and before they're dead, they've been shaped so thoroughly by the war around them that there is no way anyone could have come out of this series thinking that it in any way romanticized the events. i loved everything about it and more. but while i did love the series. tbh i don't agree with everyone saying that its the most serious and intellectual and groundbreaking book in the entire world. yes it is groundbreaking and yes it is based on a lot of real life horrific events, but it's also. extremely entertaining. it's written beautifully and has some very poignant scenes that i love, and i am gonna be honest i lost where i was going with this point. i think what i'm trying to say is like before i read it, i saw a lot of people on the internet saying that it is like. the highest peak of literature and such and like. for me, it's mostly just a damn good time. i go into most books looking for entertainment (meaning like. i would like to feel emotions, not necessarily happy ones, just emotions in general) and what i think a lot of people made it seem like, was ONLY an epic tome about the brutality of war, the military, and colonization. and it absolutely is about that ! i am not docking points for it being about those things, in fact if it hadn't had all these hard hitting topics i wouldn't have liked it as much. but it's ALSO about rin, kitay, and nezha, and how they love and hate each other. and sometimes i think people lean too much into one aspect of the book, one way or the other (i have absolutely seen the inverse of this, people forgetting about the colonialism and militarization aspects in an impressive show of hypocrisy. which... is worse imo.) but idk. i have no idea what i am trying to say i just like this book yall.

next oml. okay again grouping them together for my own sake but i read the southern reach trilogy by jeff vandermeer ! this series was such a creepy and weird and offputting good time i ate that shit right up. the first book and the biologists pov are my favorites, and all of the insight we get from her and the first book into area x was just. so compelling i could not put that shit down. i'm pretty sure the second i finished in the hospital lol i was INVESTED. and honestly. i did really like the second book. not as much as the first, but i don't think it was bad or underwhelming compared to the first. once i got past the pov shift, i really liked controls pov partly because he is just some guy. like he is just so average and banal, and seeing this set against the absurdity of the rest of the book was really interesting. i liked how even though we weren't IN area x, the southern reach still had that otherworldly and offputting suspenseful energy, even in a familiar setting (office building type i mean. as opposed to weird as fuck forest). that and also i am deep into my f1 phase so like i kept picturing control as checo perez. like hes just so guy to me like hes just a normal guy that has no fucking clue whats going on and thats really funny and awesome to me. like man. anyway the third wasnt my favorite, but i still really like the series as a whole and will probably read the 4th one coming out whenever it does.

NEXT. sharks in the time of saviors by kawai strong washburn. did i cry. maybe. did i really like the story. yes. it was definitely a change of pace for me after reading the above books but the story was lovely and magical and engaging and very sad and i enjoyed every bit of it.

after that i read scattered all over the earth by yōko tawada, which is a story that i kinda have mixed feelings about? i listened to the audio book and the narrator did such a wonderful job, i loved listening to the two man characters talk about language in the mc's made up language, panska. and if the book was just about that, i probably would have liked it more, exploring language and the loss of it; however one of the side characters constantly get's misgenders when the story is outside of her pov. and it's like. really fucking distracting. so like i guess i don't have very mixed feelings about it lol. i liked one bit, definitely did not like another bit, and the rest of the book wasn't really strong enough to sway me back into the "i like this book and think it's interesting" camp. although if you can get past the blatant transphobia, the audio book really is nice to listen to, especially coming off a post surgery high.

next i read the ghost bride by yangsze choo ! this was another really atmospheric, palpable book. i could feel the setting, the humidity, the smells, all of it and it was so good! an engaging story, i'm pretty sure i read this one in a day or two. the characters were fun, the plot moved quickly in a way that made sense, and exploring the realms of the dead and the living with the characters was so fun, definitely recommend !

im gonna wrap this post up here mostly bc im hungry but i still have a lot more to update on ! if u made it this far thank you and also im sorry. happy reading!

[baked-hylian]

Tag game: Tour my bookshelf!

Thanks for the tag, @hirazuki

An estimate of how many physical books I own: I feel really behind as over the years and moving around I haven't held on to a lot of the books I had once had. At the moment my collection is of roughly 75 books (lost count when my cat wanted to be picked up) including reference books, 36 light novels, 132 manga volumes 11 of which are omnibuses (3-in-1 kind)

Favourite author: That's not actually an easy question for me mostly because I don't pick favourites when it comes to authors, I like different ones for different things. Like I love MXTX for fucked up relationships and situations. And I like the way Tasha Suri and Samantha Shannon describe food in their works The Burning Kingdoms trilogy and The Priory of the Orange Tree. That being said I haven't even tried MXTX's first novel, nor am I clamouring to grab Tasha Suri or Samantha Shannon's other novels, admittedly I am waiting for the prequel follow up to The Priory of the Orange Tree to release in paperback, and Tasha Suri is doing a Doctor Who novel and I'm mildly tempted to check that out, but that's more so the Doctor Who angle.

A popular book I've never read and never intend to read: Honest probably most YA that I didn't read as a kid, I gave an exception to Iron Widow just because I like the author and the youtube content they produced and the concept of imagining the rise to power of the first empress of China as a young woman dealing with some type of alien/monster invasion sounded neat. Another I would say is the first novel from MXTX. There are some tropes from it that sound enjoyable, but I really struggle with the kid eventually growing up and hooking up with his teacher crush for the romance angle. Like I get that because plot technically it shouldn't matter but idk it's just not what I look for when it comes to a romance, yknow?

A popular book I thought was just meh: Under The Whispering Door by TJ Klune. He's the type of author I will only buy on sale as paperback. The House on the Cerulean Sea was super charming and fun, this was just, like sterilized handling of death. Idk I just was not a fan of it, plus the romance of it felt quite weak. Honestly Klune vibes like he'd be better off writing for tweens than adults.

Longest book I own: The Priory of the Orange Tree, if it isn't that then it's this dictionary I have specifically for old timey slang that I found while thrifting.

Longest series I own all the books to: Ascendance of a Bookworm is probably just overall the longest even comparing novels, as by the time they finish publishing it it's going to be some 35ish volumes each at least 300 pages (the odd picture probably drops it closer to 290). I'd say Tian Guan Ci Fu but that's mostly because english translations always wind up longer than the original mandarin, i.e. TGCF is only 3 books long in mandarin but getting 8 volumes in english due to length (although, honestly, I have problems with the way they keep constantly copy pasting the same glossary for each novel, could easily trim 30 pages of that and redistribute the overall story to cut out at least two of those volumes.) Inuyasha for manga and I don't even have half of the series.

Prettiest book I own: Maybe it's because I just finished it, but He Who Drowned the World has an absolutely gorgeous cover. The artwork by JungShan is just so pretty and I love the colour choices.

A book or series I wish more people knew about: Among Thieves and its sequel Thick as Thieves. Just a fun medium fantasy duology with the first book being set up and execution of the heist of a highly important magical item that will determine the fates for everyone around the world. The second dealing with the aftermath of that heist and finding out more about where magic comes from in this world.

Book I'm reading now: .......... The Magical Revolution of the Reincarnated Princess and the Genius Young Lady volume 3. I know how it sounds and honestly it's better than most isekai nowadays at least.

Book that's been on my TBR list for a while but I still haven't got around to it: The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Tried The Hobbit in high school right around the time I lost interest in reading, feels like it was mostly a me problem so I figured I'd give them another shot. Just gotta find a very specific copy of Return of the King because I already have the others from that set and I don't wanna mix n match too much.

Do you have any books in a language other than English: I used to have a Japanese pokemon card, does that count? French instruction manuals? No? Then no.

And lastly, paperback, hardcover or ebook? Situational. I like hardcover for certain lengths, but I find once you're nearing 600 pages they become irritating. Hardcover is also dependant on how much I like the author/that series as I'm cheap and I've been burned once by disappointment and not letting it happen again. However I do like that certain manga are getting the hardcover treatment, it looks very classy for some of them, like the Thus Spoke Rohan Kishibe specials, and the Fullmetal Alchemist recent prints.

Tagging anyone who really wants to talk about their books!

[livvyofthelake]

obligatory disclaimer that i have not opened a tid book in a decade and yes that will affect how i rank them… be serious no one comes to my blog for objectivity come on now

lady midnight my most beloved for all time!! it’s a revenge story it’s a murder mystery it’s forbidden romance it’s secret trysts it’s about freaks and gay people and my friends clary and jace are there and they’re treated like gods because emma lovesss them so bad… it’s excellent

city of ashes! i don’t CARE that this is the incest book you can lock me up if that’s a crime!! it has clary inventing runes! it has simon turning into a vampire! it has luke and maia and more magnus! it has a really interesting and easy to follow without being boring or too much plot! and ok perhaps i have nostalgia bias. don’t care!

chain of gold, just really nicely set up the trilogy! now. let’s not talk about it as a nice coherent trilogy because it’s not but if it were this would have been a really great setup! and i personally love the limited amount of pov characters in here. it’s mostly restricted to only cordelia lucie and james, which really works in the narrative’s favor i think. i feel like too many povs at a certain point starts feeling clunky. and in a first book that would have been sooo bad i mean we can forgive it in a third book but this was number 1… and i liked it!

city of bones. a classic is a classic….

lord of shadows. i know i just called this one “midbad” but like the thing is all my buddies are in here! let’s not talk about the plot. or the ending. um. well my buddies are in there that sure is true…!

city of glass, i think this was the perfect trilogy ending for a book that was neither an ending nor part of a trilogy <3 it’s such a great wrap up to the valentine half of tmi and also a great intro to the sebastian half… it’s just really well done i think! and clary and jace are there… and they’re in idris! and jocelyn comes back… and izzy finally starts being a bigger character!

city of lost souls, i mainly just. do nottt care for sebastian. like at all… but i do loveeee clary and simon in this one sooo bad… they’re doing bff telepathy while clary is undercover trying to save her not possessed but sort of possessed boyfriend! team good and team evil! it was cunty!

chain of iron. well i loved it in the moment and all my buddies were there and lucie and grace were kinda homoerotic for a bit which was awesome and there was a plot at least that was kind of cool even though in the end it was a bit annoying. really though this is the book that made me start to realize i just don’t fuck with james herondale that much… as lydia said. cassie didn’t let him have flaws so he was boring to read about! and it sucked! he sucked! but i did like reading this book in the moment aside from that actually

queen of air and darkness. i don’t know how to get into this. book without a plot for real. i don’t know what the plot was…. it’s not like i forgot anything i remember all of the stuff that happened in this. it didn’t come out that long ago i was there i remember it all. but. what the fuck was that seriously… just vibes i guess. just vibes and 30 different character povs and like 800 pages. it was crazy at the time of course we loved reading it at the time. also it has the malec wedding which is true and beautiful even though i don’t even really fuck with malec the way fandom bitches fuck with malec (meaning i like them and i’m normal about them… idk why EVERYONE else needs to act like that about them fr you’d think they’d never seen gay people before. which ok. i mean if you read about them in middle school maybe you hadn’t seen gay people before idk. but grow up) (i apologize for that hater ass shit i just said. you all should know by now i have a crazy aversion to popular things. and no i don’t understand how i’m a swiftie under these conditions idk what happened there)

clockwork angel. this series. straight up does not exist in my mind mostly idk what else to say. it’s been a decade since i’ve opened a tid book fr. i know i liked this one though because i always tried to slowly reread it every week at church. um sorry god for reading at church… i’m sure you can understand big guy you know i was 13 at the time! um anyway. i liked tessa’s introduction!

city of heavenly fire. listen. the thing about her is that she is so LONG. she’s a mammoth! i’ve actually never reread this one. like chronologically. i’ve reread sections of it! but that’s it. it’s just so damn long… but at the time she was huge of course. did you know this book came out ten years ago TODAY. and at that time. it was huge!!

clockwork princess, again i barely remember this but i know i liked it at the time, loved when they were fighting the benedict lightwood demon worm! rip rupert blackthorn </3

chain of thorns. i just. i just didn’t care for it. in the end. i feel like i’ve bitched about this one enough let’s not get too into it i just didn’t care for it in a lot of ways

clockwork prince. she didn’t stick out to me. i couldn’t tell you a single thing that happened in this book fr

city of fallen angels. been a certified hater of this one for ten. years. you can’t get me to stop! i just don’t like the jace possession arc because it makes me sad and i don’t like the simon cheating era because it makes him look bad and i don’t like that magnus and alec aren’t there because that paired with jace being possessed leaves us with only three of the six main characters. and simon was flopping and clary was sad the whole time because her boyfriend is possessed. leaving izzy to carry everything and of course she slays but that’s not enough to make the book good. and i never cared for the marlene plot.

the eldest curses excluded because um i haven’t gotten there yet. working on it!

tsc books ranked. a post i could theoretically make after i take a shower rn. lmk

[scandalsavagefanfic]

Hello! I am a huge fan of ur writing. I've loved everything I've read of yours. I've read alot of what you've posted, except for a couple of the tags that are squicky for me (so I'm very thankful you tag very thoroughly). No judgement for the squick, it's just not for me. & when I'm having a bad day, I usually just go thru ur ao3 and find something to reread. I think about Therapy's Bruce & Jason every damn day. While I obvs appreciate ur darker more "problematic" content (I really vibe with some of the themes you write about bc of my own trauma, & so it's very cathartic to read about in a fictional setting), I am truly a sucker for ur more happy content. The Happily Ever After verse also lives in my head rent free. Idk more wholesome stuff just seems more special when you write it. Anyways. I would die for you. But the point of this ask is cause I'm curious as to why you don't like Urban Legends? I'm sorry if you already talked about it here or on twitter and I missed it. I was just wondering because I really enjoy your take on things and would love to hear why you dislike it. I've been enjoying it so far personally, but I am always open to DC comics criticism.

Aw thank you so much! I'm so flattered by everything you just said. You're so sweet ❤❤❤❤❤

I haven't talked about Urban Legends here or twitter (I haven't been very active in either place lately. Just a lot going on and no energy 😔) but I'm happy to do it here.

Before I start though, I just want to add a standard disclaimer and make it clear that if you like it, there's nothing wrong with that and you don't have to let me ruin it for you lol. Like what you like.

That said, since you asked...

I said this when I was talking about it on discord, that there is a difference between hope and expectation. I always hope that a new story centered on Jason (or anyone really, but things have been especially egregious for Jay for 15 years) will be good or at least treat the character with a minimal level of respect (to be honest, the bar is super fucking low). But my expectations always temper my hope, to keep it from getting unrealistic. Because my expectations are based on experience.

The long history of Jason Todd, since even before his resurrection, has been one of retroactively trying to make him "a bad seed" in order to absolve Bruce of any responsibility in his death.

I don't even expect DC or their writers to start honoring the fact that Jason was not an angry, reckless Robin (and less of the later than Dick or Tim and definitely Damian). There plenty of ways that retcon can be folded into his history and be compelling and sympathetic. And if they're going to stick with that retcon, I'm only asking that they do it in one of those compelling and sympathetic ways because Jason was 15 when he died, heroically, in one of the most selfless acts in comics, to save a woman who literally handed him over to be brutally murdered. He was 12 when Bruce plucked him off the streets, he'd been homeless and fending for himself for at least two years. I personally think that Jason's story hits harder for him and Bruce if their original, canon relationship, of Jason as starry-eyed and eager to learn and absolutely devoted to Bruce and Bruce to Jason, is preserved. But Jason's origins does leave room for a meaningful interpretation of him as angry and frustrated at the lack of meaningful results of Bruce's methods.

And that's really where my irritation at stories like Batman: Urban Legends, Cheer and Batman The Adventure Continues has it's roots.

Every time one of these stories comes out, I think (or hope, rather) that this will be the one that remembers and respects the origins of the Jason and the Red Hood, that takes into account the changed sensibilities of comics readers in the 30 years since Jason's death and the subtle, 20 year, retroactive campaign to make him the "bad Robin". The "born bad" trope is played out and literally no one likes the message it implies. That some kids are just bad eggs and there's nothing parents or the adults around them can do. Especially when it's played as the kid's fault. If Jason's time as Robin is going to be characterized by anger, then it should be rooted in anger at the social injustices he witnessed as he grew up in an impoverished, crime-ridden, area and the horrors he faced raising himself when every day was a battle for survival. There are topical, meaningful, stories to tell with that backdrop.

But those are never the stories we get.

⚠⚠ Spoilers for Batman: Urban Legends, Cheer ⚠⚠

I'm particularly disappointed in Urban Legends because for the first issue, it looked like that was the kind of story we were going to get. I was put off by the first flashback of Jason being mesmerized by Bruce's guns, and I got that feeling in my gut that it was a bad sign. Jason depicted as impatient and overconfident and the scene with the guns is heavy-handed foreshadowing that got my spidey-sense tingling. I had a inkling then (in the first three pages) of how this story was going to play out, but it was early and I could still see many narrative paths that could lead to a satisfying story. My concerns were soothed somewhat and the little flame of my hope fanned, with the flashback of Alfred scolding Bruce, with Barbara's concern for Jason. A bit of worry returned with the way Jason ruthlessly pursued an addict who didn't appear to be a dealer and with the ending of the issue. The stuff with the addict sat wrong with me but the ending was tempered some by how despicable Tyler's dad was written. The scene was clearly set so that the reader could sympathize with Jason's decision and the scene with the addict could be brushed aside as a side-effect of comics over-the-top need for constant action, so I still held hope.

Issue 2 made me uncomfortable and it's where my hope starts to take a backseat to my expectations. I can dismiss Jason's self-deprecating internal monologue as unreliable narration, except that the flashback reinforces his thought process to explicitly show that it's not unreliable narration, and should be taken at face value. Jason faces physical abuse at the hands of his mother's drug dealer and when the flashback continues later, Jason kills the drug dealer. To be clear, this is a pre-Bruce Jason. His mom is still alive. He's like... 10. He kills this guy for shoving his head into a wall and implying Jason's mother paid for her drugs with sex. This is a scene that serves a single purpose. To show that Jason has always been prone to violence.

In the spirit of full disclosure, there is the small chance the drug dealer might not be dead. But the story obviously wants the reader to think he is, and it hasn't done anything to change that yet.

Starlin already did this story with The Diplomat’s Son in 1988 and he did it infinitely better. AND that’s still technically canon. So now I’m supposed to believe that Jason lost his cool bad enough to kill two douche bags before his sweet 16? Like it’s totally normal for abused kids raised in poverty, who’ve led hard and heartbreaking lives to just... haul off and kill people? That’s bullshit, and when taken with the Jason in the third issue, who is little more than an idiot thug, this story is really doubling down on some fucked up stereotypes.

Which brings us to the most recent issue. I went into this installment with very low expectations. I thought this story was going to be about Jason, through this experience with Tyler, a young boy with a similar background to Jason's, coming to the realization that Bruce's way is the best way and that Bruce did his best by Jason.

That would be annoying (in no small part because it takes increasingly absurd levels of plot armor to keep Bruce's no kill rule relevant, let alone irrefutably right). But I can probably live with that, if only because maybe if Jason officially falls back into line with the Bats crusade, maybe I'll get stories that treat him with respect, stories that don't relegate him to comic relief, dumb brute, or a background body with no lines in a story about the Joker burning Gotham (like Jason would just fucking stand there quietly for that).

And that may still be where the story is going, Jason realizing Bruce is right.

But holy shit do I not have the right words to describe how fucking insulting and gross issue three is.

From start to finish--including the flashback--Jason is written as cruel and fucking stupid. Like straight up dumb.

The entire issue is Bruce explaining the fucking basics to Jason like it's his first day. And Jason flies off the fucking handle and terrorizes a doctor he knows isn't a part of making the Cheerdrops, beats the shit out of some random addicts, and finally, when he can't accomplish anything on his own because he's a dumb brute he calls Barbara for help and rushes in with no information where he's promptly incapacitated and must now wait to be rescued by Batman.

This panel is the least of the issues sins but I can’t screenshot the entire story but it’s representative of the tone for the whole issue (and retroactively tainted the prior two issues).

This is beyond insulting. The only conclusions Jason comes to in this issue are the ones Bruce leads him to by talking to him like he can’t make the simplest connections. And like... in this story Jason can’t make the simplest connections.

This (and the Jason throughout the entirety of this issue) is a far cry from the Jason we fell in love with in Under the Red Hood, who was competent and strategic and intelligent enough to seize control of Gotham’s underworld from Black Mask (who’s no fucking slouch, he’s the first and only person to unify organized crime in Gotham) AND elude and manipulate Bruce until the time and place of his choosing.

This is a far cry from even the Red Hood and the Outlaws Jason who is competent enough to fight the League of Shadows and Ra’s al Ghul (among very dangerous and skilled others) and smart enough to create antidotes for mind control nanotech viruses.

As he should be, by the way. Jason Todd is one of the best, most comprehensively trained fighters in DC’s stable of non powered vigilantes. He’s not irrational or hot headed. He’s pragmatic, tactically minded, and patient. He’s a detective. Right now. Has been since he was 12. Bruce doesn’t have to make him one because he already is. 

Jason is not a stupid thug who uses his fists because his brain doesn’t work. And I can’t tell you how so very exhausted I am by this narrative. 

This is actually the most egregious example of Jason’s skills and intelligence being not just undermined but dismissed entirely. Even Morrison’s Jason had some degree of competency. 

The one, single redeeming factor of this story is the art. It’s beautiful. And Marcus To is a godsend he seems to be one of only a couple of artists who remember that Jason was a child when he was Robin and I’m literally only buying this book because of him. 

Anyway, I’m sorry. I didn’t want that to come out so... um... passionately lol. I’m just very very tired. My intention with this isn’t to ruin it for you, if you like it, that’s fine. 

But this issue shot this story to the top of my "Vehemently Despise” list. 1) Batman: Urban Legends (Cheer), 2) Battle for the Cowl/Morrison’s Batman and Robin, 3) Batman The Adventure Continues.

I hope the next issues somehow salvage this dumpster fire. But I’m not expecting it.

(Damnit. That sounded harsh again. To reiterate, I’m not trying to judge anyone who enjoys it, I just personally hate it and you asked me why lol 😅)

[mountain-man-cumeth]

How would you rewrite Muriel’s route?

This is the 3rd question I got with similar vibes so imma begin by saying that I am not a writer. I am a reader, a decent one, but I’m not the idea guy. I will try, though, since it seems like people are interested for some reason.

First of all I'd make some baseline changes to set the backstory proper;

Muriel chose the mantle of Lucio's executioner willingly, him and Asra had no other means to survive so they willingly worked as indentured servants under Lucio. He reasoned with himself thinking these are bad people and that he has no other skills to offer. (There might be a threat on Lucio's part that they can be replaced, he doesn't have to had given a villain speech for the implication. He is a rich tyrant and they are street kids, it the service they provide isn't up to par Lucio can easily look for alternative options.) Let me be clear, Muriel was not a gladiator. Gladiators are compensated generously for the entertainment they provide and often due to the amount of investment made on them, fighting to death wasn't a common occurrence. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that Muriel, or rather the Scourge was well known and probably liked by the crowd, there's literally no reason for Lucio to utilize him otherwise. He wants people to enjoy the show, if everybody hated Muriel what use is he to Lucio?

Kokhuri are alive. The tribe had to relocate but they left Khamgalai to tend to the graves. They are nomadic and matriarchal people who likely don't adhere to mother-father-child kind of European family structure. The children are raised communally.

Muriel's curse has nothing to do with myrrh, there's a rune that can counter it and only he knows how to make it, he figured it out by himself for Asra. Any magic that can nullify a spell by Major Arcana is no doubt strong as fuck.

I'd start similar to main 3, MC is tasked to find Lucio's murderer. They find Muriel's brush or loincloth or whatever early on which leads them to the forest but because of the protective spells and the curse they get lost. They ran into Muriel or Inanna and she leads them to Muriel hunched over the corpse. They try to help, like the canon, and have a brush with Lucio's goat ghost. They tell him they were looking for the Scourge and Muriel says there's no Scourge here.

The day after they forget about Muriel but remember the rest and relay that information to Asra, who gets agitated by Lucio's return. He thinks Lucio is here for MC's body but doesn't explain anything, instead begs them to leave town until he figures something out.

They go to see Muriel and he reluctantly agrees to accompany them to the outskirts of the forest, on Asra's request.

Some point on their road trip Asra water-calls them to inform them that Lucio is looking for hearts and the Magician (or whoever else Asra consulted) implied they might find answers South. MC still doesn't know anything except maybe some comments Muriel could have made that painted Lucio in a bad light but they decide to investigate regardless. Muriel opposes, eventually caves (either thanks to MC or Asra). He lets out that he's been tailing MC on Asra's behalf for years so it shouldn't be that much different.

They go from town to town, MC helps Muriel ease into dealing with people again and it's easier since nobody knows jack about Scourge. They learn that he enjoys card games and collecting trinkets from different cultures. He might even get a little too enthusiastic about plants and gives random advice to a gardener.

We might learn here that Muriel doesn't like feeling that he's on a display or that he's performing. He prefers to lay low and blend in, not necessarily completely shut off the world.

They run into Morga(maybe they encounter raiders or a barfight or something alike), who's also been tracking Lucio. She proposes to work together. She berates Muriel for being a coward and convinces him to fight as that's all he's good for. (I think it's better if MC trains on magic rather than archery, I'm seeing alot of disabled MCs.)

She tries to train them but Muriel doesn't respond well to fighting and eventually Morga leaves. Valdemar or Vulgora catches them, Lucio's still trying to get MC's body. They escape just barely, MC gets hurt, Muriel beats himself up over it, some angst some fluff, you know the drill. Maybe he has a panic attack because panic attacks are usually not as on the nose as "Oh No I Gotta Fight Someone With a Knife". Looking for a shelter and aid, they find a cottage which turns out to be Khamgalai's. She helps them out, teaches Muriel how to heal using the techniques of their clan, I assume MC helps since they know some restorative spells too. She tells Muriel his family sent him away when they got ambushed so he wouldn't have to live on the run as Morga's clan was on a war path to conquer South. We get sad, lots of tears. Kisses might ensue.

Somehow it's revealed that this is the answer they were looking for and not Lucio (because I think the whole "Lucio's clan" plot was redundant) and Morga was just using them as bait to get Lucio out of Vesuvia.

Morga catches on to them, we learn who she is, Muriel and MC confront her but Khamgalai says her warmongering already costed her everything. She says she's trying to make up for it by killing her son and she needs MC to lure him out, they agree to work together, begrudgingly. (MC's past can be revealed here since they need to learn what's the deal with Lucio's obsession of them at some point)

Around this point MC might realize the mark's fading, Muriel brushes it off.

Instead of Lucio, Devil comes and tells them about Lucio's plan to do the ritual again. They go back to Vesuvia to warn people

Masquerade happens, people remember Muriel, Nadia or MC or someone give people an ultimatum. But oh no it was a TRAP all along, Devil told them of the ritual to get them right where he wanted. Lucio gets in MC's body, Asra sends them to the Arcana realm, same story as main 3.

MC forgets Muriel on the Arcana realm but through the power of love and maybe some guidance from the Hermit they go "oh no i forgot my boy". They return to find him in the Coliseum. What?! He was the Scourge?! Who could've thought. (this reveal wouldn't affect MC's opinion at this point since they already know he's a cinnamon roll)

This time Lucio's blackmailing him with MC's body. He says he needs hearts to make himself a new one and if Muriel grabs some for him MC can get their body back.

Story diverges to Upright/Reversed

Upright, if MC encouraged him to take it easy, but take it: MC snatches the body of someone he's suppose to fight to change his mind, he decides not to do it and instead go with defeating Lucio on the Arcana realm plan(curtesy of their friends). So here we can have a romantic scene like in Nadia's route where his chains are broken in the Arena.

They fuck around in the Arcana realm facing their fears and stuff, they bond, defeat Lucio, petrify the Devil etc. I like to think Muriel finds the forest spirit here, too, and maybe manages to heal it or learns that it's damaged but with enough time and care it will regrow. (a metaphor? in my arcana game? its more likely than you think)

Morga is charged for war crimes by the Kokhuri, the Coliseum is demolished and the love birds travel around doing their thing.

Reversed, if MC encouraged him to be strong and uncaring: MC fails to convince him and he decides to go through with Lucio's plan. He kills Morga and some more important spirits and fucks up the world. Which turns out to be a bogus plan anyways, Lucio only needed the hearts to settle his deal and Muriel kills him, too (I am untethered, and my rage knows no bounds!)

Without a body MC is stuck in the other realm so Muriel and them retreat to the magic dimension, defeat the Devil and live the rest of their days.

There might also be a 50 first dates situation going on inwhich they get stuck in a loop where MC constantly meets and falls in love with Muriel only to forget him in a couple of (magic realm)days.

idk man this aint my job im just spitballing here, im writing this long ass thing so ill look like im working

[oddsacky]

A - I love a lot of them. Favs rn tho are The Gauntlet, I Will Give You My All 2017, and Sorm Fuel Overload

B - Idk. Was never that invested in the story. I guess I wish there was more backstory for the heisters and contractors

C - It's between Vlad and Bain. Bain is awesome because he really cares about the heisters, he's always by their sides. He's just super loyal which is really cool. Vlad, however, is ridiculous. Funny man.

D - Is Crimewave considered DLC?

E - I hate stealth I enjoy Jewelry Store stealth because it's the only stealth heist I can do.

F - I do not like Hoxton Breakout. Day one isn't too bad. I do like the plot and this part's default theme is The Gauntlet so that makes it so much better. My only complaint would be the lack of cover. Day two, however, is fucking stupid. It's literally just sitting and waiting in a mostly enclosed space which is fucking boring. Then you get tasks where you've gotta move to a new location. Getting there means walking through the crowd of cops that have built up cuz you had to stay in that other spot for ages. Once you arrive at your new location, guess what you gotta do? More sitting and waiting! Then the process repeats until Hoxton finishes which takes forever depending on how long it took you to do the tasks and God forbid you let the cops touch the power outlets cuz that adds even more to the sitting and waiting timer just wow this heist sucks.

Aftershock also sucks cuz the place is way too open. I hate having to wander around the place for 10 minutes cuz I can't find the last truck. Then I have to haul these heavy ass vaults and around which is a huge problem if the truck they were in spawned on top of the bridge. Then I have to try to not get lost and drive the vaults away. It's just not fun.

Finally, Goat Simulator is also not that great of a heist because again, big open area that's easy to get lost in (not a problem in day 2). Also no cover most of the time. Especially during the bridge part of day 2. Just why?

G - All of Wolf's pager lines. Also Jacket referencing the HLM creators is cool.

H - Idk I really like Beneath the Mountain. I like the vibes. The turret part isn't fun but other than that, it's a solid heist.

I - I don't use favors and preplanning in general. I think it takes too much time and that I don't need them unless I'm absolutely sure it's going to help me win.

J - Giant spoon.

K - Brothers Grimms with the fire ammo. It's not efficient but it sure is fun. It's satisfying and I love setting the cops on fire.

L - Wolf howling. Wolfie 🥺

M - I absolutely adore Graug. I just love the fire and charcoal design and the monster is so cool

I also love the Awkward Seal mask because I love seals.

N - Hoxton Breakout is overrated.

O - Firing into a large group of cops with the Brothers Grimms with fire. Lighting like 20 cops on fire was so satisfying.

P - Cutscenes. It would be so cool if there were actual cutscenes in Payday 3. I also want a cutscene of Wolf and Hoxton kissing but I think that's too much to ask for.

Q - I don't think I've ever rage quit. If I did, I can't remember what happened.

R - I'm not interested in stuff that would make sense for a good crossover if you know what I mean (like I don't think it would make any sense for Payday and Terraria to have a crossover). It would be awesome to have another Hardcore Henry crossover. I remember reading a comment somewhere saying Henry could be the next mute character in the gang which would be really cool.

S - Stoic. Gotta love the alcohol.

T - I think the thing that most surprised me was the fact the tarantula in Lab Rats could kill you if you got to close. I'm not sure what past me was expecting.

U - Vlad making goat noises is hilarious.

V - None. Both villains are bad. I hate them. Dentist. Hector. I hate you.

W - Probably Overkill cuz I did a lot of crime spree (never got very far lol). It's enough of a difficulty where it's challenging and not overwhelming most of the time (except the one heist where you steal a vault. The sniper elimination part is so difficult).

X - Yeah. Yeah I would. Bain didn't deserve this. It makes me sad.

Y - No because Crimewave hasn't been updated in like 7 years.

Z - Let's ignore the fact that I haven't played in ages uh I think it's a unique game. The concept is something I've never seen in any other games before and it's really fun to play. Also I love the characters

Wow that's a lot of questions answered. That took about 2 days lol

The ABCs of Payday - Q&A edition

You can either answer all of these yourself & tag people to also complete it, or you can RB and your followers can pick a letter and you answer. Or you can just do nothing that's cool too ig.

A is for ALESSO: favourite track?

B is for BALDWIN'S LAMENT: any regrets or things you wish were different about the game/story?

C is for CONTRACTORS: favourite contractor and why?

D is for DLC: favourite DLC you own?

E is for ECMS: favourite stealth/stealth-only heist?

F is for FUUUUUUU: most-hated heist?

G is for GENSEC: favourite pager line?

H is for HEIST: all-time favourite heist?

I is for ILIJA: are you a favours lover or do you prefer the challenge of going in without favours?

J is for JOKERS: dumbest thing/moment about the series?

K is for KILLKILLKILL: favourite/best way to kill cops?

L is for LIVE-ACTION: favourite live-action/web series moment?

M is for MASKS: favourite mask/s?

N is for NO MERCY: hot take/unpopular opinion about the games?

O is for OVERKILL: best/coolest thing you've ever done in-game?

P is for PAYDAY 3: hopes for Payday 3?

Q is for QUIT: what makes you rage/quit?

R is for RESERVOIR DOGS: cross-overs you'd like to see in Payday 3?

S is for STOIC: favourite/most-used perk deck?

T is for TASER: most surprising moment/thing that happened in-game?

U is for UKRAINIAN: favourite Vlad moment?

V is for VILLAIN: favourite baddie and why?

W is for WE CALL THIS A DIFFICULTY TWEAK: preferred/most-played difficulty?

X is for XENODIAGNOSIS: would you want Bain's disease to be curable and why/not?

Y is for YULE: do you typically play seasonal updates and why/why not?

Z is for ZEAL: what makes you excited about Payday and keeps you coming back to play again and again?

[villainanders]

if u feel so inclined, I would love to hear more about Deara (or any other dragon age ocs tbh) :3

anon i am kissing you on the lips ty for asking about her

idk specifically what you want to know about so i am just going to infodump about daera okay go.

okay so daera is my first and canon hero of ferelden she's a dwarf noble warrior. before the events of the game she was more or less uninterested in politics - her popularity with the assembly mostly stems from her being an extremely capable warrior and a charismatic leader. she never really has aspirations for the throne and was pretty happy with the idea that she would spend her life as a general defending her home from the darkspawn. she also bought into orzammar's traditions very easily - she was empathetic, but too privileged to have ever seen the dark side of the caste system and never questioned that it was the natural order of things

so when her origin happens and she gets exiled it's a massive blow because she's lost everything, but also because she feels like she's lost everything that made her a dwarf by being sent to the surface. so she ends up completely throwing herself into being a grey warden, wanting to die as honorably as possible fighting darkspawn

but then SIKE she goes to the surface and she makes FRIENDS and she starts realizing how limited her understanding of the world has been. her first and best friend in the game is alistair they're just. meathead jocks who give each other shit and love each other to death. she also romanced zevran - initially really just planning for it to be a causal fling/fwb relationship because she did come into this fully intending to die fighting the darkspawn and has never really looked past ending the blight. but eventually she begins to realize she's in love with him and wants to be with him for as long as she can. they are everything to me, chaotic murder duo. elf assassin and his small berserker wife who beats people to death with her shield

anyway when she goes back to orzammar she's feeling like pretty hot shit. she's made a name for herself on the surface solving like everyone's problems and she wants desperately to go back and prove herself to her homeland and show what a liar bhelen is. that is... not the situation she walks in on. instead everything she's been realizing about her home is in her face as problems that Are Not Going Away, and she has to choose between harrowmont, who she trusts and has always been like an uncle to her but is holding up a system that she knows is morally wrong and her evil baby brother who personally caused every single one of her problems but might be exactly what orzammar needs for the future ("i've known bhelen his entire life and this is the first time i'm hearing that he's a fucking democrat" - daera returning to orzammar, probably)

and... she chooses harrowmont

and it's a hard choice but her rationale is that while he's set in his ways, she genuinely believes he's a good man and he will listen to her if she pushes him hard enough, whereas bhelen will do the right thing now that it benefits him, but who knows what will come in the future (this is the only choice in my canon that I don't make in ANY of my other playthroughs lol). but she also didn't expect bhelen to actively try to take over after that, and in the ensuing fight, she's the one who kills him - making her an actual kinslayer, the thing she was falsely accused of in the first place

anyway she leaves orzammar deeply troubled and worried that she might have doomed it, but still tentatively believing that she made the right call. then blah blah blah plot stuff. she made alistair king largely because she did not trust anora (the scheming gave her bhelen vibes) and her first instinct was to spare loghain to help end the blight, but when alistair pushed back as hard as he did, she relented and let him execute him. and then they go and prepare for the final battle

when daera finds out one of them is going to have to die to kill the archdemon, there's never really any question that it needs to be her. alistair is too important now and, well... she had always planned on this, right? dying honorably ending the blight was exactly why she decided to join the grey wardens instead of being another dead dwarf in the deep roads. but now she kind of doesn't want to die. as much as she feels like she never wants to go back home now, she's also found out that she loves living on the surface and she loves her friends and she loves zevran and she doesn't want that to be over

so when morrigan tells her her deal, she's conflicted. she loves morrigan but she also doesn't trust her. she knows that the old gods were what caused the blight in the first place and she's worried that unleashing one will cause something even worse. the darkspawn have been an immediate threat her entire life to the point of being at the brink of wiping out her entire culture and if she does something that could endanger it further - and the entire world at large - for her own selfish reasons, she feels like the worst kind of traitor. how could she take the throne from bhelen, how could she kill bhelen for not trusting his motives when she would consider something like this?

... but she really doesn't want to die yet

so she asks alistair to do the ritual (I have a lot of thoughts about the dark ritual and what happens after that I wont go into here lol) and neither of them die and everything is GOOD except now she keeps waiting for the other shoe to drop. the only reason she's alive is because she betrayed the core value of what the wardens are so she really doesn't want to be doing grey warden shit in awakening (she ended up sparing the architect for reasons that are. too long for me to get into in this already way too long post lmao but needless to say she feels deeply conflicted about that too). she returns to orzammar sometimes to fight with harrowmont with political shit but can't really stomach being there for too long. she already feels like she's failed it in more ways than she can admit and she feels like she should stay and fight for a better future, but also it feels like she bought her life on the world's borrowed time and she wants to make use of it

eventually she leaves to go to antiva with zevran and help him with his stuff there, which feels a lot better because fighting for him is something she knows is worth fighting for. and they're happy there and she finds out she loves big cities and the sun and the ocean, but its always a little tempered by knowing that the world thinks of her as a hero when she feels like she's failed it in so many ways. but also she’s alive and she gets to keep hanging out with her sexy elf boyfriend so, you know, she would do it again

[shmreduplication]

anyway so basically licensing songs for tv and movies is extremely expensive, that’s why it was such a big deal that Happy Birthday became public domain, the fact that it was under copyrite is why every chain restaurant had to make up their own pseudo-happy birthday song that they could get the whole staff to sing to people on their birthdays

so that means that any song that is worth the cost is probably going to be a sparknotes version of the entire episode/movie.  For example (also btw this post is going to be about timeloops eventually, bear with me) the ending of Breaking Bad (spoilers for the ending of Breaking Bad) has Walter listening to a song about a cowboy going home to his lover to die in her arms.  He listens to it in the Southwest (cowboy territory) on the way to his meth lab and dies inside it while it goes up in flames (end spoilers)

so one of the (imo, v few) positives of the groundhogization of timeloops is the use of a song to wake up the protag.  It serves as an extremely quick way to communicate to the protag and the audience that they are still stuck or finally free from the loop.  Groundhog Day used I Got You Babe by Sonny and Cher.  This is actually a weird case because the song is about two lovers who have nothing but each other (they don’t care if they can’t pay rent, they don’t have a lot but they know they have each other.  These aren’t the actual lyrics but the general vibe) so it’s not actually about Phil or being in a loop, the lyrics are in contrast to Phil.  They describe all the townies of Punxsutawney a lot more than Phil, but eventually he figures out that he does “have” the entire town’s population, he becomes friends with everyone and finds meaning thru that even tho he’s lost his entire future and everything that he’s been working toward.

Gotta Get Up by Harry Nilsson is used in Russian Doll and it is just perfect.  Nadia is in a decaying timeloop and the song itself decays from this ragtime tune to an unsettling .  I don’t know the word.  The notes are all played from lowest to highest in this v strange way.  I think a gliss is when you sweep your hand over the piano keys but this is not that.  IDK how to describe it but it’s unsettling.  The lyrics are about growing older (it’s set on her birthday) and being late (probably meant in the normal sense for the song but takes on a double meaning for the show) and growing cold (this is referring to death in the song but also takes on a double meaning in the show because it’s set in winter).  It’s so fucking good you guys.  Alan has his own song for the loop and it’s some classical lyricless thing that is in the public domain, I’ll look up the specific song and how people write about it later but rn I’m talking about lyrics

50 First Dates has Wouldn’t It Be Nice by the Beach Boys and this is kinda cheating because that song is about literally every piece of romantic fiction ever.  It would be fucking nice!  It fucking would be fucking nice god damn it!!!!!!  Also this is the only one where the song is relevant to the plot and chosen by a character.  Well I guess Alan chooses his song but I’m not talking about it because it doesn’t have lyrics. In addition to Lucy choosing the song to be relevant to her loop, it actually impacts the plot.  Her dad and brother notice that she only sings it on days that she meets Henry.  By that point the audience is led to be thinking “wouldn’t it be nice if her memory problems could be fixed or have some positive progress” and her singing it is proof that her daily pattern can be affected

And then Supernatural chose Heat of the Moment by Asia which.  First of all is a weird choice, it’s a romance song but the show is about two brothers.  The song is imo more about Sam as a person than about the episode/the loop.  The boys live their whole life in the heat of the moment.  IDK it was fine, I’m not going to rewatch the whole episode just to analyze the song lyrics, but I do recommend looking at the imdb trivia page for the episode.  It takes place on a tuesday because the x-files episode is called Monday, the song that tells Sam that it’s wednesday is the same song that tells Marty McFly that he’s back in the present.  Obviously the Winchesters are using a clock radio, just like Phil in Groundhog Day, they put a lot of thought into the episode