#idk anything about ao3 i barely know how to post to tumblr

[all-thestories-aretrue]

Johnny finds Neil high out on the balcony and confronts him about his apparent uptake in kalif use, causing Neil to spiral further. Weighed down by visions and signs, he shuts down, leaving Johnny to care for him in a moment of vulnerability.

After three months, I'm finally finished. Apparently, I just needed to be trapped inside for three days straight with nothing else to do.

Anyway, if you click through, mind the tags.

[faiell]

yapping about fics and commenting

sorry to yap but work is boring today and tumblr isn't blocked on my work computer LOL

ok it's abt that post where the writer friend stopped writing because they weren't getting the comments/kudos they wanted.

i'm like. an overeager fandom person. like i cannot get into a fandom without wanting to meet new people and make friends. i love yapping about whatever silly gay idiots i'm hyperfixating over. i'm all about community, and sharing the joy of fandom, and all that fun positive stuff.

i don't post my art for stats but like. that means nothing coming from me tbh. i get stats. i can't accurately predict what would happen if i stopped getting notes on my art, but i would probably keep drawing and keep posting, just maybe less confidently, and less often. i recognize that stats make it much easier and while it’s not my primary motivation, it definitely motivates me to keep posting.

and yet. for years, i never commented on fic. i think i left kudos? and i saw posts like this all the time about how writers were so sad they didn't get comments. and i would feel super guilty about it all the time. but i still wouldn't do it! it sounds stupid, but i would feel pressured. if i liked a fic a lot, it felt even more difficult to comment, because i thought i would have to somehow give back to the author everything that fic gave to me. i wanted to craft the perfect comment that could perfectly encapsulate everything a fic made me feel. and that was way too much pressure so i would just not say anything.

when i got into drarry, i started reading a shit ton of fic. and i still wouldn't comment. i left maybe... 2 or 3 comments, maybe, i think. i can't remember. but i had a lot to say and i WANTED the writers to hear that i had read it and liked it. i just... didn't comment! u know what i did instead? i just fucking straight up DM'd writers on discord and started gushing to them that i liked their fic. somehow i was confident enough to do that, but writing a comment still felt like too much pressure. ?? i don't understand it either, but in my head it felt like a writing assignment, but when I was in DMs it felt more like a conversation and so there wasn't any pressure to make it "good"? idk!! it's very weird.

then i wrote and posted my first complete fic. just a oneshot, nothing special, and i was like. UNREASONABLY nervous about posting it. like. i am a confident person, okay? i was going to make a burner AO3 account and post it under a different name so nobody would know it was me, and then never mention it to anyone except MAYBE super close friends. i got talked out of doing that (thanks i feel a bit silly about considering that now). and then i received my first comment on it, which was basically a two-liner where someone said they liked it and thanked me for writing it.

and i was like. ??...?????? ???????? ...??!!! because i felt like... uncontainable glee? i was freakishly happy. the amount of serotonin those two sentences gave me was definitely unnatural.

is that healthy? idk. will it continue? idk. LOL. i hope so? but idk, some people said it wears off if you write/post for a while. but whatever, the fact that one little comment like that could make my entire day blew my mind. tbh i thought writers were just exaggerating when they said stuff like that.

ever since then i started leaving comments! that shit's easy! like what was i overthinking for? i'm such a fucking tryhard! all i gotta say is that i liked it, and even the bare minimum can bring lots of joy to someone.

so basically what im trying to say is that negative reinforcement doesn't do shit!! it just makes people feel bad about themselves. that post is nasty for guilt-tripping readers like that, and i bet you it's going to have the opposite effect (or no effect tbh).

YAPPING FINISHED. for now.

[lindamccartneysstrap]

hell0o. i dont know anything about the beatles but i just watched two of us on a whim and have become insane. fic recs please or just any content, news articles interviews idek. help me tumblr use paulmccartneyprostateorgasm

Sorry I haven't been ignoring this I've just been Thinking. The thing is that I've been into the beatles off and on since I was in middle school so it's hard for me to remember like. Beatles 101. But welcome to hell. Two of us is a cwazy intro to mclennon lol.

Ok so I guess the thing is really depends on how serious you wanna be with your idk beatles scholarship? Like at an absolute bare minimum I would skim some wikipedia articles so you know the major people/places/events/eras. There are a zillion beatles bios and docs most of them bad some of them vital. Unfortunately it haven't gone through any of those since I was a teenager so I can't really tell you which is which anymore. I'm sure plenty of other beatles blogs could provide resources if you want them.

Definitely watch get back and let it be. The movies the beatles were in as well but less essential I guess. Advanced Level McCartney Studies but watch give my regards to broad street it's a fascinating reflection of pauls psyche.

I'd look at blogs like @amoralto @thecoleopterawithana @undying-love for references. Probably more upper level stuff but all of pauls interviews are on the paul mccartney project website and I once went through and read all the interviews from the 80s. Full disclosure, the thing about mclennon that compels me the most is the tragedy of it all, so that's where I tend to fixate. But it was a fascinating experience because you can really see paul work through his regrets/grief/resentment/bitterness/pain about john in real time

A word of caution when reading interviews: both of these guys are incredibly untruthful at times. John, after the breakup in particular, could be very hot and cold, especially about paul so don't take everything he says at face value. Paul also lies a lot no matter what anybody tries to tell you he just gets away with it more because he's still alive and people feel bad calling him a liar

Songs. Their songs are very very important. I sometimes see people act like it's stupid to believe things based on the songs. To a point I get it art doesn't have to be literal yadda yadda. But you also gotta consider these guys communicated a Lot to each other through music from the time they were teenagers. Anyway I'd suggest listening to the songs for a more thorough understanding but just reading lyrics I guess is fine. I personally still like going through people's mclennon playlists and analyzing Why people think they're mclennon. Look at the lyrics, go to beatles bible and/or the paul mccartney project and learn about the context, etc.

Okay anyway on to fanfic. If this is your main concern just ignore all the above advice who cares. Also I'm a horrible resource because I always forget what I read. Um @forthlin @menlove @pauls1967moustache have good fics sorry I can never remember any of your ao3 names. Merseydreams (I think it is) has good fics. @crepesuzette2023 does a lot of fic recs I think. One thing that's always fun about beatles fics is when u think something is completely made up and you look it up and it's literally real like wtf. I'm also a bad reference because I'm heavily biased towards early days fics and post breakup fics.

Ok hope this helps even a little bit. Remember the most important rule is to have fun. People take this shit so seriously but it's literally the beatles. But please do fact check that always drives me nuts.

[dseval]

[★INTRO POST★]

Hello, page visitor. If you'd like to, please read this intro post. (And if you don't want to, that's fine, too)

QUICK FACTS:

Dseval || Adult || Artist

Contains: Sansshipping, Sans AUs, UTMV

May contain: Nothing too extreme. All will be tagged accordingly (so please block it if you're uncomfortable). So far: #cw ecto body, #cw smoking, #cw blood, #cw suggestive

DNI: Proshippers, Pro-Israel, Queerphobic, etc.

Requests/Asks are Open.

(i promised myself that after posting 10+ posts I will create an intro post idk why. Guys. Is this how tumblr works?)

!! These are always open

Unless stated otherwise. But this does not mean I will do/go along with everything.

Asks/Submissions (you can also ask and submit anonymously)

Art Suggestions

Art Trades (preferably by moots/friends)

✧Also, feel free to use my art for everything non-problematic. I'm okay with you taking inspiration or copying directly from my drawings. Or repost them. Just make sure to credit me— or better yet, tag me!

☆Accounts

2nd page: @dsevalyappuccino (for shitposts, reblogging, yapping, and lowres doodles)

Twitter acc: @/dsevalxdsx (there is actually nothing here, but it is open for DMs)

AO3: dseval (there is actually only one fic, don't expect anything in the near future)

Bluesky: dseval.bsky.social (not really active, but I post there sometimes, and I accept DMs)

For commissions and inquiries, feel free to message me anywhere or email dsevalxdsx@gmail.com

☆General Info

✧ I am Dseval. (Pronounced dee-s-eval eval like in the word evaluation.) If you feel like it isn't a cute/short enough name for you— then you can call me Eva. Or call me whatever, I'll tell you If I dislike it.

✧ I draw. Occasionally I also code, make games. I also write fanfics (barely), and make music (barely).

✧ I won't reveal my age, but know that I am not a minor.

✧ I'm Queer. I'm okay with all pronouns, but They/Them is my personal favourite.

✧ I am not open for any relationships, in case you plan on asking.

✧ I am okay with dark topics, I love exploring them, but I do prefer wholesome things.

✧ I'm shy. As in, ☆super shy☆. So I may not post often and chicken out of conversations. Please do not be offended If I did that, you did nothing wrong.

✧ I did say I'm shy. But I also over-yap. I like friends. I'm accepting friends anytime anyday. On the topic of over-yap, I apologize If I ever said something that offended anyone. I am not very great at socializing.

✧ I also don't understand tone tags. So i apologise if I'm slow to get things.

✧ NSFW or suggestive is okay. But I don't really make these contents myself.

✧ I am OK with tagging. In fact, tag me in everything.

✧ Most of the time, I act on absolutely no reason and just because. Do not overthink my actions.

✧ I am not diagnosed (mental healthcare is very poor in my country). But I suspect I have Bipolar Disorder. I may have mood swings and be over-excited at times, or be too tired to response. I hope for your understanding.

✧ My favourite color is PURPLE, in case you can't tell.

☆ Expect:

Expect mostly Undertale Multiverse content, but to be more specific...

Drawings of Sans AUs

Sanshipping

Genderbending Sans AUs

Making my own AU (not speedrun)

Maybe other things, a list cannot list all of my interests

... All in my inconsistent artstyle.

However, feel free to also talk to me about Deltarune, My Little Pony, Evangelion, and Madoka Magica, and several gacha games. I am very deep into the lore of all of the above.

☆Interests

My favourite AU Sans' are Cross and Dust/Murder. (I also think they should kiss)

I am a multishipper, and my bar is very low so I swallow pretty much any content just as long as it is appropriate. Here are my favourites though:

☆ Cross x Dust, Cross x Dream, Color x Killer, Nightmare x Error, Horror x Farm, Geno x Reaper, Fatal_Error x Lavender

I absolutely eat those up, so if you know me and you know about these, please tag me in any related content.

☆If...

Do not interact with me If you are any of the following:

You are a proshipper/comshipper/darkshipper (or, whatever name you call yourself). I do not support that behaviour nor do I do condone it.

You are pro-Israel, Queerphobic, body shamers, pedophiles, zoophiles, etc.

You spread hate and harassment.

☆Tags

× General tags (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠)

#archiveverse (for my AU)

#dsevalanswers (for every asks that I answer)

#dsevalartreq (for every drawing requests I completed)

#kebaya skellies (for every drawing of any skeleton in kebaya)

#dsevalreblog (for reblogs interactions something just for me to visit later)

#gifts (for anything someone gives for me)

#dsevalyappuccino (for whenever I talk without posting art, this tag is also used by my 2nd acc @dsevalyappuccino)

× Event tags (⁠´⁠⊙⁠ω⁠⊙⁠`⁠)⁠！

#dsevaldrsa15 (i put almost all AU Sanses into a spin the wheel program 15 times and then draw the wheel's picks for 15 days straight)

[hermiola]

Writer's Meme, 2024 Edition

I've been tagged by @turquoisedata 💜

-------------------------

How many works do you have on ao3?

14. 6 Good Omens + 8 MCU, but we have to go back to 2014 and 2016 for those. I also used to publish on an Italian fanfiction archive where I have 70 more fics (I went back to check and count them after approximately two thousand years and HOLY SHIT, I didn't remember them being so many! My first fic is more than 20 years old WTF).

What’s your total word count?

150.000 words on AO3. But I'm guessing it's waaay higher than that (the Italian archive doesn't show the word count 🥲).

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

My GO fics have the most kudos (given the popularity of the fandom + the fact that they're written in English and not in Italian). I have 6, so the top 5 is basically all of them:

Take a Little Love From Me (Pretty Woman AU)

Final Breakthrough (Now!) (Post-Season 2 Fix-It)

Crazy Little Thing (Called Love) (Non-S2-complying silliness)

When Hell Freezes Over (Human AU with magician!Crowley and critic!Aziraphale)

Let There Be Rock (First meeting after 1967)

Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?

I do! I don't get that many, so it's not overwhelming, and I just like to respond. As I said somewhere else, my experience in the GO fandom has been mostly a solitary one (recently not so much though!) so I just like to interact whenever I can.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I'm going to consider only the GO ones because I feel like the others have been written by another me entirely (also I'm not sure I even remember them).

So it's definitely Let There Be Rock.

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

I'd say all of them, but Take a Little Love From has a proper epilogue and everything. I guess their happiness has more space there than elsewhere.

Do you write crossovers?

I have in the past, but not anymore.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not that I know of.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Not really. I LOOOOVE reading smut (especially in those chonky slow burn fics), but I can't bring myself to write explicit smut for some reason. I love describing the tension and the heat of the moment (I love UST so much I'm going to marry it tbh - like nothing makes me happier/hornier than two people who want to fuck each other but can't for some reason - am I edging myself? IDK) but when it comes to my own writing I feel like spelling out the details just ruins the moment. I do think it's my ace showing in some way. But, anyway, I read the filthiest filth so this definitely doesn't apply to reading. And who knows, maybe one day I'll try! I'm not ruling anything out.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so?

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I used to translate HP fics back in the day (from English to Italian). We're talking 20 years ago. And it's funny when you think about it, because I translate novels for work now 🤣

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, always back in the day with HP. I'm still friends IRL with the girl I wrote them with (we actually met because of HP) (this is as good a time as any to say FUCK YOU JKR).

What's your all-time favourite ship?

This depends on the hyper-fixation of the moment. I cannot multitask with my OTPs. If I get obsessed with a new one, I retire the previous one. Like I could split my life into different time periods just based on my OTPs. Ron/Hermione has been my personality for YEARSSSS, but now I can barely think about HP without cringing. Another BIG ONE was Clint/Natasha from the MCU (which explains my look here on Tumblr), but the MCU as a whole has gone a bit stale for me (with few exceptions). And now it's all about Crowley/Aziraphale - it's so bad I had to unretire from fanfiction writing after almost 10 years LOL.

(I like many other ships but not to the point of *obsession*).

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

The only one I can think of is a Clintasha Actors AU, but I don't think I have it anymore, and I wouldn't finish it even if I had.

What are your writing strengths?

Dialogues and banter are my favourite things to write, and I think it shows.

What are your writing weaknesses?

English is not my first language, so my writing lacks variety I think. I feel like I have always the same phrases stuck in my head, so it's probably kind of repetitive, especially when compared to some of the fics I read. (But when I started writing my first GO fic in English I wasn't even sure I could *actually* do it, so I'm proud of myself either way!).

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I think it's okay! I personally would ask a native speaker to help me (if possible) instead of going the Google Translate route. Being Italian and watching/reading almost exclusively in English I know how silly it sounds when the characters start speaking your language and they're saying nonsense (but no harm done even in this case, imo, especially in fanfics. In movies, though, it's just lazy!).

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

HP, back in 2004 (welp).

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

None, thankfully. If I'm writing fanfic it means I'm in the late stage of hyperfixation and I don't wish that on myself if I can help it. Like I used to read 50+ books a year before GO S2. It's bad!!!

What's your favourite fic you've written?

Take a Little Love From Me mainly because it's the one I've spent more time with.

Tagging some people if they feel like doing it (but no pressure at all!): @beerok23 - @sabotage-on-mercury - @gaiaseyes451 - @leviosally

[vinylfoxbooks]

Fox Intro Post

I'm finally getting around to my introduction post thingy, so here it is:

Name: Fox Pronouns: She/they Sexuality: Lesbian and on the ace spectrum Age: 18

Fandoms: Marauders, The Magnus Archives, VLD, etc. etc.

Ships: Jegulus, Moonchaser (mostly exes), Starrosekillerchaser (and any variation), Dorlene, PandaMaryLily, JonMartin, QPR TimSasha, Gerry/Micheal, Keith/Matt, etc.

I write primarily Jegulus oneshots here on Tumblr and also on my AO3 but I've also done a couple other things. I post on Saturdays (unless I don't have anything) and sometimes Mondays if I have a lot to post. I don't really do big projects often because I don't have the attention span for that so it's hard, but I will post chapters on Mondays on the off-chance that I do have a multi-chapter fic. I'm also a hard nonbinary James headcannon and it's in everything I write.

I am open to asks of any kinds: headcanons, advice (though IDK how much help I'll be), random questions, random things you want to say, microfic requests, anything!

I also have a second account (vinylfoxtalks) where I'll talk more about personal things and books (I love reading, specifically this year my reading list consists of entirely Rick Riordan and Brandon Sanderson). This is also where I like from.

Here is my bingo master post

Finally, here's some of my favourite things I've written:

Microfics

June 15 - Release Jegulus microfic w/ canon divergence

June 23 - Brain Fluffy Jegulus microfic

June 24 - Improve Jegulus microfic w/ body horror, and killer James

June 28 - Lawyer Jegulus microfic w/ protective Effie

August 9 - Cemetery Jartylus microfic w/ the three dancing in a cemetery

August 19 - Invite Jegulus microfic w/ Six of Crows Halloween Costumes

Lilene Lily x Marlene microfic w/ Lily and Marlene going to their school's dance together

August 27 - Magazine Jegulus microfic w/ James doing fiber art for their friends

September 1 - Fashion Jegulus microfic w/ Sirius helping Regulus get ready for a date with James

September 6 - Glass Jegulus microfic w/ Mary learning that James is not, in fact, straight

September 7 - King, September 8 - Shadow, and September 9 - Curl Jegulus microfics w/ Regulus and Sirius learning their pirate lovers have been captured

September 11 - Journal Jegulus microfic w/ Sirius finding out about Jegulus and confronting James

September 14 - Metal Jegulus microfic w/ Regulus reacting to James' new piercing

September 23 - Candle Jegulus microfic w/ James joining Regulus in a self-care day

September 26 - Light Moonchaser microfic w/ James and Remus sneaking away from a party

October 4 - Honour and October 8 - Scratch Jegulus microfics w/ James coming to rescue Regulus while he's being forced to attend his parents' party

October 9 - Jealous Jegulus microfic w/ unrequited Moonchaser and Bartylus leading to Jegulus making a plan

October 13 - Wave Jegulus microfic w/ Regulus being forced to go to the beach with his partner and brother

October 26 - Remember Jegulus microfic w/ Potions teacher Regulus getting informed that James still has a picture of him in their room

Ao3 Fics

Got Some Spare Balls Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 1,251 Regulus loses the ball to his lip ring and is annoyed by the fact that he has to wait and watch the jewelry until he can grab a spare ball from Evan or Dorcas. However, and much to his surprise, James comes to the rescue with a container of spare jewelry that Regulus didn't know about.

They're Soulmates (Impossible Not to Love) Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 5,013 James and Regulus announce their relationship in a very dramatic way--usual for a man like James Potter--but the Gryffindors are more shocked by the way that Sirius reacts to their relationship; not at all. And that's because Sirius has known about them for longer than any of them realize. They're childhood friends and Sirius has watched his brother and best friend fall in love, he's seen the way that they're perfect for each other.

His Bare Skin in Flashing Lights Jegulus oneshot, M, wc: 3,402 Remus, Sirius, and Peter sneak into a Slytherin party with the help of Marlene and Dorcas, though they're very aware of the fact that James was 'busy'. Upon being at the party they see a certain someone with a certain little brother.

Oh Boy Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 7,476 Harry's family is going to be having one big dinner and Harry was told to invite his friends and Draco to it. So he does, and his friends get to meet the pure chaos that is Harry's family and see the interactions between them.

He Knows (Because He's One Too) Jegulus oneshot, G, wc: 4,410 Remus, a werewolf, and Sirius, a vampire are trying to hide the fact that they're not human to their overwhelmingly human best friend. However, they learn that they might not have to because there's the possibility of James dating a witch...

What a Coincidence (My Love and I are Wearing Red) Jegulus oneshot, M, wc: 6,899 The marauders are throwing a traffic light party and James is wearing red, but who is he dating? Who else is wearing red at the party, because Lily's wearing green.

You Please Yourself by Pleasing Me Jegulus oneshot, M, wc: 1,424 Reggie loves hickies. He loves the look of them, not necessarily the act that accompanies them. Luckily, James has an oral fixation and is all the more willing to give him a necklace of hickies.

And a Song Someone Sings (Once Upon a December) Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 12,514 In which the Potters and childhood friends host a Christmas gala every five years for all the less fortunate wizards and everyone's invited.

He's Looking At Me Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 7,160 Sirius and Remus encourage James to ask his boyfriend, Regulus, to the Yule Ball but Lily doesn't hear 'him' and assumes that he's going to ask her out. Through sharing this with the girls, Marlene gets her with Mary.

The Restricted Section JonMartin oneshot, T, wc: 2,020 Sasha and Tim are having a hard time getting a book they need for a follow up on a statement, because it's in a restricted section that they just can't access. Jon, however, happens to be able to help them--because of course the nerd would have access to a restricted section in an academic library. But that's not the only thing the two assistants learn about their boss because who is this Martin guy helping them?

You're Severely Mistaken JonMartin oneshot, T, wc: 1,788 Tim and Sasha are nervous about dressing up for pride month because Jon, to them, seems like the old homophobic boss that grumbles about 'kids and their sexualities and blue hair.' Turns out, they were wrong.

Love is an Art (And You're a Professional) Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 7,628 James is a potter and Regulus is a painter. They share a studio and each other's hearts but neither of them know of their association with Sirius (just as he doesn't know about them). Just cute, fluffy moments between Regulus and James in their lives and prepping for an art gallery, and learning about their intertwined lives.

Fluorine Uranium Carbon Potassium (Barium Boron Yttrium) Jegulus oneshot, M, wc: 2,458 James is taking chemistry though they constantly complain about it. When asked why they continue to take it, they can't really supply an answer. Turns out the best thing keeping them in the course is one pretty boy that they can fool around with.

Oh I, Do I Love a Little Bit (Of Kiss Me Kill Me) Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 4,715 Sirius convinces Regulus to help him and the rest of his frat run a charity event and he gets stuck watching the person he's had a massive crush on make out with people all day.

I'm Leaving Home for the Coastline (Some Place Under the Sun) Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 11,470, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompt: 'Regulus Stealing James' Sweater' Regulus runs away from France and finds himself in a small town where he finds a very pretty person.

I'm a Creature of Fine Sensation Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 1,903, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompt: 'Black and White Films' James takes Regulus along on a tradition that they have with Remus and Lily, going to a drive in theater that plays black and white movies.

Beauty in Betrayal Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 7,368, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompt: 'Apocalypse' Regulus shows up at the Potters' house on Halloween and tells them that they were betrayed and that they need to run. They do and them, Harry, and their friends find refuge in a hidden area.

Starry Eyes and Warm Smiles Jegulus, 11/11 chapters, T, wc: 29,848 Regulus gets paired with his annoying classmate in his art class, James Potter. Regulus slowly learns that James maybe isn't that bad after all and James might be able to get a date out of this whole thing.

Following the Prophecy Jegulus fic, 5/5 chapters, T, wc: 17,927, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompt: 'Dungeons & Dragons' Lily is DMing a D&D campaign with some friends and new faces, that's it. It's just a kind of homebrew D&D Here's a link to the character sheets, one per chapter posted.

Oh My God, They Were Roommates Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 4,066, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompt: 'Childhood Friends' Sirius invites Remus, the guy that he's been talking to and Regulus' coworker, over to their flat for the first time and informs his brother and best friend that they should engage in their 'plan', the same thing that they do to everyone new that Sirius brings about to the flat.

Protect Me (Take Me Away) Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 13,784, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompts: 'Regulus Sings to James' and 'Sectumsempra' James and Remus are pirates that went under cover as knights to kidnap the princes. Along the way, they happened to fall in love.

This Man Belongs With Me, I Want Him Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 5,193, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompts: 'Animagus AU' and 'Black Cat Regulus' James goes on the arduous journey to visit his husband, a vampire living in a faraway castle in France, and how he loves the journey.

Better Than a Movie Jegulus oneshot, E, wc: 6,310, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompt: 'Latex' The group convinces Regulus to go to a Halloween party, where he happens to run into James... James who's wearing a skirt.

Two Alike Minds Jegulus oneshot, T, wc: 7,234, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompts: 'Camping Trip' and 'A Proposal' James takes Regulus out on a camping trip to help distract him from his classwork. It turns out to be the best camping trip of Regulus' life, no matter the complaining.

All I Need is (To Come Home to You) Jegulus oneshots, T, wc: 3,336, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompt: 'Wildest Dreams' Regulus and James are together behind the scenes of their fame, and the Marauders go on with a little surprise during their London show during their Wildest Dreams tour. Said surprise being a special guest that turns out to be Regulus and a couple sweet love songs.

Mama's Always Right Jgulus oneshot, T, wc: 10,238, for the Jegulus Bingo Prompt: 'Codependent' James and the Black brothers have known each other since childhood and the Potters and Alphard always assumed that James and Regulus, long before his coming out and subsequent transition, would get together from the way that they acted around each other. That changed with time and gender changes, or did it?

[crguang]

childhood friends to anything else is actually so important to me. like childhood friends to strangers w some level of unrequited love? like idk the your absence shaped me in ways your presence couldn't? is always so ugh, like the bittersweet stuff if they ever meet again and one of them is so changed in their time apart and it'll just never be like that again. was rereading some greek myths, the tragedy and like lost opportunity and the yearning is always amazing. but like that au fits so well w kafka, i was thinking abt it and the au also kind of reminded me of the one from folklore, like if you wanted me you really should have showed and if you never bleed you're never gonna grow, but we were smth don't you think so. but also im being kind jumping the gun and being self indulgent rn like what if come back...be here from red. like "told myself don't get attached but in my mind I play it back," if I had know what I know now I never would've played no nonchalant," idk...

ok I saw ur posts abt cheryl having like inconsistencies, and like a slight southern accent, but i personally don't hear it. speaking from experience when I open the game but accidentally just listens to kafka's voicelines (I still smile every time, i even still giggle sometimes, smth is very wrong w me), but idk abt more recent stuff. i also just don't like southern accents, so I might be in denial. and yeah there's barely any fics w her nowadays (she needs to come back fr), but also your kafka is just like...the best. revolutionary in fact, like you get her so bad.

-🌠

ANONNNN I LITERALLY LISTEN TO THE 1 WHENEVER I THINK ABOUT THAT AU… ITS THEM. “i persist and resist the temptation to ask you if one thing had bene different, would everything be different today?” and “in my defense, i have none for never leaving well enough alone, but it would’ve been fun if you would’ve been the one” IS SO KAFKA STILL REMINISCING A DECADE LATER. folklore is a must whenever i write them, you should listen to seven as well it’s my favorite song from the album and captures the innocence of childhood so well. i was never a childhood friends to lovers fan but they changed my perspective fr. the bittersweetness is killing meee i cant handle this angst of grieving both what could’ve been and what has been, i just want my girl happy😞 when the person you’re missing is right in front of you but not there at the same time how do you even process that. you should watch the movie past lives they’re literally that movie to me

i dont hear the southern accent either, in my opinion she just sounds lazy/bored at times but maybe it’s cause im not attuned to all the subtleties in her pronunciation so perhaps there are traces of it and i just dont hear it😭 i also still giggle whenever she says the “thanks, you’re too good to me” healing voice line hdjsnfnfjfjggjjdjdhd cause i am too good to her actually. also “oh, bye bye~” will always get me idccc she sounds so cute im gonna die like that’s my baby

i should go scout ao3 for kafka fics its the only platform i havent gone through yet, tumblr fics just tend to be short and sweet thats why i like it there but there’s nothing lately oh my days we’re in a drought. at least we still have artists😣

[kaviary-blog]

20 Q’s for Fic Writers

I got tagged by the wonderful @wedonthaveawhile

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

None. That might change soon. But I’ve got like 9 here on tumblr

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

Zero

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently mostly Hogwarts Legacy but I’ve been writing little fics and stories since I was in elementary school

But to give a taste of what I did… when I was a small child I wrote a multi chapter story about fruit (fruit fandom was all the rage). I’ve written for Undertale, FNaF, Miraculous Ladybug, Mass Effect. Maybe more than I’m remembering and they will never see the light of day. (Most of what I wrote was original ideas instead of fanfic)

4. Top five fics by kudos?

Horrors of the Scriptorium parts 1&2, That Which Lurks Behind, Never Knew Her Name, After the Nightmare

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! I try to and I love feedback and talking to people

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Pluv says Never Knew Her Name has the biggest gut punch but I write alot of angst so…. Idk

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

After The Nightmare. Kinda the only non angst fic I have and even then.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I have

9. Do you write smut?

I have not

10. Craziest crossover?

Those exist solely in my brain and the ears of my sister

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I seriously doubt it

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Probably not

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not really. I have characters I share with people. But even in my youth I don’t think I co-authored anything

14. All time favorite ship

SHAKARIAN!!! Garrus x Femshep

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

So so many. The amount of ideas that have barely even taken shape is a whole other list entirely

16. What are your writing strengths?

Tearing your heart out. Idk

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Fluff. Idk how to be happy

18. Thoughts of dialogue in a different language?

Super cool when done right! (Don’t ask me what that means. I’m not fluent in any other languages)

19. First fandom you wrote in?

Uhhhh. I think the first fic I ever wrote I was really little and it was about Rapunzel. (Her and her kids in the future and like, half of them died. Angst even back then)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Ummm of the ones I’ve posted here…. I’m really proud of That Which Lurks Behind

But usually when I write something I forget I wrote it. I write bastard words with my evil fingers and make it everyone else’s problem.

No pressure tags: @cuffmeinblack, @eternalremorse, idk who else. Everyone I know has done it

[teecupangel]

Okay so, I don’t know much about Destiny, just like the bare minimum stuff, but after I found out about the Hunter class I cannot stop thinking about what if the Assassin crew (Des and his ancestors, y’know) were Hunter Guardians? Idk about story wise what they would do, maybe deal with any Isu left over artifacts, maybe? I just think it would be neat. The hoods, the stealth, the whole Nightstalker subclass?? It’d be dope.

(I love your works btw, I’ve been binging both tumblr and ao3 how dare you be so good at writing)

(Thank you! I'm happy you loved what I've been writing hahahaha)

So I’ve talked about what I feel would be the type of Guardian every AC protagonist would have which originated from this post where I analyzed why Bungie made the right choice making Altaïr a Warlock)

But it would also be fun if they were all Nightstalkers (maybe make it a plot point how Altaïr was stripped of his Sunsinger subclass after a failed mission and becomes a Hunter as a punishment while Ezio is just starting out as a Hunter himself so that Ratonhnhaké:ton would be more or less their leader for a change).

And I really like the idea of Desmond just being a Ghost and he recognizes his ancestors but they don’t recognize him or anything about these Assassins or Templars. They just think he might be a Ghost with his functions sorta going whacked but he manages to connect with all three of them and seem to function as normal…

Then he starts saying this might be a POE thing and the three Hunters start to believe that Desmond might have gotten close to a relic of the Darkness with his original ‘Guardian’ and that’s why he’s getting his information all out of order or just plain gibberish. Their mission now would be to find this POE that Desmond is talking about which he believes to be on the planet Earth which, as far as the three Hunters believe, is currently under attack.

“That’s bad!”

“It happens a lot.”

“That doesn’t make it less bad!”

So they travel to Earth to try to find this POE that Desmond talks about (unintentionally getting sidetracked by the current geopolitical ‘unrest’ on Earth) and they start to learn about the Assassins and the Templars.

They learn about the Isus and the connection they may have with the Darkness and the Traveler.

And then…

They reach a forgotten place and it took a while before Desmond realized that it had been some kind of Abstergo research and development facility.

And in the deepest part of the ruins…

They learn the truth.

The Darkness is a failed experiment of Abstergo that uses what remains of Desmond Miles’ corpse and the rest of Sample 17.

It grew to have a sentient of its own that had been corrupted by years of being tested and broken apart only to be rebuilt once more again and again in an endless cycle of needless pain and it is angry at everything and everyone.

And the Ghost that had found the three Hunters?

It was what was left of Desmond Miles’ humanity that The Traveler was able to take out of the Darkness, placing it into one of the very first Ghosts they have ever created and pushing it to the galaxy to find the ones who can defeat the corrupted remains of Desmond Miles:

His three ancestors reborn…

[quiguibooks]

announcement

hey everyone, long time no see.

i dont know how many of you follow me here tbh but i decided to post this anyways haha

ive made an announcement on AO3 explaining this in detail, so if you can please read it! but the TLDR version so you all can be aware: firstly, i will no longer be writing fanfics, ive moved all my old fics to a new account and will turn my current AO3 account into one for my original works. i explained more thoughtfully in there the reasons why i decided to do this instead of using a new one for originals, so if youre curious about that, again please read the original announcement haha. and secondly, i will also be rewriting and reposting "Cursive" as an original book, completely cutting ties from anything related to DNF and MCYT in general. i have already made a new publication for the new Cursive, so if you wish to keep reading the story in this new version, please subscribe to that work! i explained why i wanted to cut ties with it, and also explained why although ive already decided to rewrite, im not sure yet when i will be posting the new first chapter. so again, if you want the details, read the announcement haha

thats basically all i had to say

i never really used my tumblr a lot, but i think i still will completely rebrand it to match my new content, deleting anything related to my time in the MCYT fandom, like starting it over haha. i was thinking of possibly deleting this one and making a new one, but i feel like its too much work considering i barely use my account anyways. so yeah, i'll soon change my name to match the rest of my social media accs and use it for my original content as well im also deleting my current twitter, and moving to a new twitter that will be used exclusively for my original creations. i also shared my instagram account since im mostly active there, and i also have another twitter for multifandom that i will also use as my personal non-writing related twitter, although idk how active i will be there well, thats all for today! thank you to everyone who reads this, and thank you for all the support you gave me throughout the years!

[sapphicscience]

hi charlotte if u still are doing fanfiction ask (one day later). 9 (i think u possibly have answered this but love MORE favorite scenes/lines), 11, 18, & 10!! and for the LAST one ... there are so so many lines in ur fic that i think about constantly but here are a few

"It's a blur, really. It's a cascade of phone interviews and smoothing things over and she's never been good at softening her own edges but it's easier now, now that she's barely here. She apologizes to the reporters, both friendly and unfriendly, whose calls she's missed, and she doesn't tell anyone to fuck off. She's politer than she's ever been, eyes bright and empty, and there's nothing behind her voice."

"She tries to speak, but no sound comes out. She just gapes, mouth open like it's waiting to be met with another." --> i have never written lottievan again simply bc this line is literally like. ok there's nothing more to be said!!!

""Callie," she repeats. She doesn't feel what she was afraid to feel: no metallic taste of blood in her mouth, no ravenous hunger.

She doesn't feel—anything." --> insane. expecting to feel ravenous hunger.

"She's half-asleep when Shauna whispers to her. "Tai." She's close enough that Tai can feel her lips move against her neck. "Do you think we're like...really awful people?"

Tai rouses herself, rolls over to look Shauna in the eye. "I think...I think we're doing our best in a really fucked-up situation. Just like we were back then." She reaches for Shauna's hand and squeezes it.

Shauna squeezes back, but says, "That doesn't really answer my question."" --> characters asking if theyre bad people .. my weakness.

anyways theres probably SO much more but . there we go!!

oh my god sophie this is SO kind....shut up!!! thank you!!!

(if anyone wants to read the fics these are from they are: tai post-s2 divorce fic, short lottievan fic, shauna pregnancy trauma fic (i was really on my babyeating trutherism with that line huh), the "tai calls shauna for help with sleepwalking and jaw pain" fic)

9. What’s your favorite line(s) or scene(s) that you have written?

i HAVE answered this and it's SO embarrassing to answer. i was proud of the lottievan quote you pulled though!/i think you got most of the best bits of my writing lol. i also had fun writing the taivan banter in this fic:

Tai pulls her hand back. "What is this, Van?" "What, I can't be nice?" "I don't know, can you?" Tai levels a look at her. "When I want to be," Van says, and she winks. "Oh, shut up," Tai says, "don't be charming." She rolls her eyes. "Is that how you get the girls on your apps?" "Oh my God." Van runs a hand through her hair. "No, it's mostly, 'Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?' That kind of thing." Tai laughs despite herself. "Sounds like you're a real ladies' man."

STUPID!!! i love them.

11. How many words do you have on AO3 (if you use that platform)

170,311 (i guess that's not a lot across 63 works but that still feels like a LOT)

18. Recommend someone else fic! (And tag them if they have a tumblr!)

i assume this means recommend someone else's fic! i promise i am NOT sucking up when i rec your tai and van post-rescue series....it's so traumatic i love it so much. also will always love this van werewolf fic.

10. What are your top five fics by kudos or by reads

lol let's go by kudos. NONE of these are yj lol.

jessica jones: jess/trish "five times" fic (888, the only fic i ever wrote for this fandom but they were DESPERATE i guess)

orphan black: cophine high school au (689, cosima is in a band??? idk LOL but this was so well received at the time)

supergirl: alex/maggie smut (619, another pairing that i think was just really desperate for fic, esp explicit fic)

killing eve: basically they just erotically share an apple (510, the only one-shot on this list)

killing eve: the VERY recently completed post-s2 alaska -> murder road trip fic (366, cowritten with my friend quincy, everyone go read it)

again thank you SO much for this extremely kind message <333

[ravenelyx]

For the fic writing ask game! 13, 22, 38, 53, 66, 75!

Hello Soph <3<3 thank you sm !!

13- Do you listen to music while you write? If yes, what have you been listening to recently?

Nope, too distracting truly 🥲 no matter if it has words or not -- by brain stalls and I just end up either staring at the wall or singing :")

22- Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process?  How do you come up with titles?

Sometimes i do it before the story itself even exists (like ilyet and arranged heartbreak or the wips listed in my masterlist), sometimes in the middle (an epiphany moment in which my brain goes YOU KNOW WHAT---?).

Titles are usually based on the core of the story if the fic is rather long:

I love you in every timeline: inspired by DSMOM originally -- it's actually a wordplay on the entire story : it holds its essence entirely, playing on the identity of the two girls, the contrast of Sebastian's emotions and the way time affects the whole ordeal (how he himself has as well, directly on indirectly, affected both past, present and future). I have a very late scene written out already which explains pretty much everything, but I can't spoil it and I feel like a quivering leaf when i think about it (brain write faster pls i want to reach it soon --- but not so soon bc it's literally towards the end)

Arranged Heartbreak : pretty self-explanatory (i had thought the title to be lame at first and then I just... didn't care)

As for the other short fics, they're pretty simple titles tbh --- except for the list in my masterlist: I went all out and those don't even exist yet

38- What is your most self-indulgent posted story?

ILYET itself 🥲

She's my precious, my baby, my dearest love --- also, MC 2.0 herself is based on my OC (Lys Lovelace my dear) since I haven't written anything about her (appearance and stuff is still ambiguous as a true x reader story)

53- What is the most-used tag on your ao3?

I expected it to be something angsty : it's actually "fluff" :||

Just fluff

I'm a sappy idiot fr

66- What’s a fun fact about ILYET?

Edit: one fun fact no one probably knows about is that the whole fanfiction was actually born from a teen wolf edit that ended on my tiktok fyp... yeahhh... and it's a stydia scene, when Lydia walks up to the group asking "where have you guys been?" and Stiles turns around, completely struck. And then idk why my brain just decided to take that scene and just... make the whole thing up into what it is now...

75- Is there a particular fic that readers gravitated towards that you didn’t expect?

Pretty much all of them -- I've never really had any online presence before tumblr so I wasn't really expecting anything when I first started writing, really :"")

I remember when i posted the prologue of ilyet: it was late at night, (friday night, about 11:45 pm -- i remember it like it was yesterday) so I just posted it, went to sleep and expected nothing in return -- then I woke up to like 300 notes in barely a few hours and I literally jumped out of my skin🥲🥲 those were the good times

But fr -- I expected Loved like to flop bc I literally word vomited it at 4 am, posted it without even rereading it, and then woke up to ppl liking it fr (I still hate it, don't doubt, but still...)

Aaaand... yeah.

Ask game here <3

[mwebber]

read through the threads and oh my god, this is all so severely fucked up and i can’t believe today is the first time i’m hearing about it (outside petty anti/pro ship squabbles online). also, what the hell, otw racism and ai?? how does the prev post have less than 1k notes? why isn’t this everywhere?

my knee jerk reaction is to pull all my fics from ao3 immediately.. i don’t know if that’ll help anything. i just don’t want to be complicit in sending any further traffic to the site. i’ll certainly be boycotting it until shit gets addressed, but by the looks of it, they won’t do anything. this is really fucking sad considering ao3 is like the only organized place for fic with filters and everything and ugh. Ugh.

most pressingly for me personally is i don’t know what to do with the rest of nayq. i worked so hard on it, i don’t want to just leave it unfinished?? i had a whole freaking novella to tell. there are still four more chapters left (three?) which is almost an entire month of updates where i’d need to continue using the site. even if i post the rest of the fic tomorrow, that’ll still result in sending people over. if i don’t, that’ll personally drive me insane because my brain literally cannot handle an unfinished project. the only real moral solution would be to delete my account and my fics entirely or remain complicit? but also like, nice dichotomy, idiot, what lies outside of it.

i literally don’t know what to do? how are other writers handling this?? i have dozens of fics all saved from the start of my writing journey in middle school, it’s like a fucking diary of my creative writing development. where else is there to go? i had a meeting with someone who does copyright work for wattpad and they were explaining what they do and monitor so i know i can’t post shit there. fanfiction dot net sucks to use and physically read. tumblr search by tag barely works.

this is all just terribly upsetting and i’m ashamed i wasn’t aware of it earlier or else i wouldn’t have posted anything there (or hell, even written anything that would’ve got me in this dilemma in the first place). maybe i’ll sleep on it and stop word dumping, idk. i really don’t know.

[ganondorf--apologist]

mahonia, sage, edelweiss, and aloe vera

mahonia ⇢ what place, thing, activity inspires you most and how do you express yourself when it does?

Hmmm, a lot of things inspire me but they all kind of inspire me in different directions, so I'll go with the one that inspires me to write since that's most of what I do on here and ao3.

This is going to come with the Chili Advisory Warning: I don't recommend this, this is just sorta a me thing.

So, for writing what gets me into that inspired writing zone is two things: Alcohol + Music. My feels are sorta super blunted by my inhibitions, so drinking makes it easier to feel my feels and not be so worried about my writing being bad or too much and the right music sets me right on my way to pondering the blorbos in the situations they're currently in in my stories. I've also sorta been drinking for a while ^^; so being drunk kinda helps me reconnect with whatever memory or experience I'm pulling from in my writing. This does, however, make editing a fun nightmare lmao bc that I do 100% sober so I have to parse through whatever it was drunk me was writing and get it down in a form that's actually somewhat readable.

sage ⇢ what ‘medium’ of art (poetry, music, fiction, paintings, statues etc.) is the most touching to you? why do you think that is?

Writing! All my life writing has sort of been what's been able to really grab me, and I think that might be bc of my adhd? With anything else I can multitask or zone out and still get part of the jist of things, but when I'm reading all of my attention has to stay on the page and I have to keep track of where I am and what's going on bc the whole story is playing out in my head at my pace and I'm having to imagine the emotions and details and everything as it's being described to me so I just end up sinking so much more into it emotionally.

edelweiss ⇢ how’d you think of your url/username? what’s it associated with to you?

kajhdsflajdskfljadskljf okay, so, I like writing fic as a hobby, been doing it on and off for years, usually but not always when shit in my life's not great, but back before I made the ao3 account I never posted any of it I just shared it with like one or two other ppl. So! Be me, like march 2020, and I've started writing this VaaGan fic. Now, I pop over to both tumblr and ao3 to see what the VaaGan scene is like and, holy shit, it's basically me and like five other beautiful wonderful people on this tiny life raft ship. I double check ffn to see if maybe at one point there was anything for it, also like barely anything. Me, five-ish other people, small life boat ship. So! I tell my wife about it and decide "you know what, fuck it, I'm gonna make an ao3, I'm gonna help paddle this god damn boat, let's go!" and idk if I was the one who said "welcome to chilis!" or if my wife is the one who said "welcome to chilis" but that meme stuck in my head and became my username lol

aloe vera ⇢ what’s something (mundane) you really want to experience in life?

hmmmmmmmmm, I've experienced a lot of things in life so I don't really have anything particularly mundane that I'm left wanting to do ^^;

[ashtraythief]

How do you get so much engagement? Not in a jealous sort of way, but more in a curious way of someone who seeks tips/advice on the matter. It seems these days fandom is much more…distant than it once was and it’s a bit discouraging, you know? I can barely get any sort of engagement, either on my socials or my ao3, but to know you have such a devoted fan base (such as me!) it fills me with hope that it’s possible :)

Any tips and/or ideas?

Oh wow, first off, thank you so much for your kind words!

As for engagement, I don't know if I have much wisdom to give there. Spn fandom is definitely getting smaller, has been for years. Even when I got into it ten years ago, it was already past its prime.

Gonna share what little knowledge I have under the cut.

So I am not the right person to ask about socials lol. I have very little engagement on tumblr actually. I know it doesn't look like it right now, but usually I go months without getting asks. And then I guess sometimes whenever I get one, other people see it and remember they can send me asks? And then I just get a bunch, of which I suspect several are from the same people 😅, and then things go quiet again. Usually, most of them are related to the underneath verse, which makes sense since it's an ongoing WIP, and people have questions (that I am very happy to answer, always! Even tho I can't give anything about the ending away 😅). I used to post fic links here, but I got so little engagement I eventually gave up on that. It didn't seem worth the effort of formatting the posts, but I also have no way of knowing how many people just check ao3 and how many click on a link on tumblr.

Twitter is a little different, but it's also gotten more quiet there. The end of the show didn't help and then recent events *cough*prequelgate*cough* accelerated the decline of J2 fandom especially. But I get some interaction with fic posting there, more than on tumblr anyway, so that's where I post new fics. I think it's helpful to screenshot the summary and attach it to the post for more info. Maybe? I've never done a survey on this lol. Definitely don't be shy about retweeting and reposting for timezone purposes and on different days. Some people follow so many accounts they won't see your post otherwise.

As for fic engagement, idk. A good snappy summary, enough tags for people to get interested but no overtagging? But like, I'm a bad standard here, I think. I've been in fandom for over 10 years, I've written almost 200 fics in all kinds of genres, so people know me. I've also participated in gift exchanges, challenges and auction fics, which is also something that gives you exposure. And I was lucky that one of my first big fics was popular. So I guess a reasonable amount of people know me as a J2 author.

Also supporting my theory of being known is that I recently posted a fic in a much more active fandom and I immediately had like four times the engagement I'd usually get for J2 fics, but still much less than the popular fics in that fandom.

And not all of my spn rpf fics get a lot of engagement either. It always depends on subject matter, pairings, trends in fandom etc. If you look at my fic list, you'll see a lot of fics with few kudos for a variety of reasons.

I still write them, even if I know not a lot of people are interested in them, but I still enjoy writing them. And I always think, if there's only one person whom I brought joy with my writing, it's worth it. But I definitely understand that more feedback is also more joy and good for our egos. And I know there are people out there who don't care about that, which is valid, but I think it's also okay to care about it.

Idk if this is helpful. I can try to give more specific advice for fic things if you have more specific questions, maybe off anon if you're comfortable with it?

Otherwise, thanks for your faith in me and sorry that I have so little wisdom to share 😅

[fonulyn]

So i saw on the 2023 in review post that you said a your fics 'flopped', what exactly did you mean by that. I know this can be relative but do you mean not getting comments or kudos or something else? I have kept up with your works and purely from my perspective it seems like you get comments and engagement and that so many others get enjoyment out of them (and say that).

I don't have an ao3 account, but when I heard about how important things like comments were to authors, I made an effort to leave guest comments on fics and authors know if I liked something. I don't quite know if this is enough, but I'm not really sure what else readers can do.

I mean comments. I know some people track hits or hit/kudos ratios or whatever else but i don't give a damn about ratios, it's all in the comments for me. the very point of fandom is to share things you love with likeminded people and get to actually talk about them, imo, so when I try to share a thing I loved and there's barely any response then it defeats the whole purpose to me and I am left starving.

and lol I get engagement? yeah sure some fics do get comments. but I've also posted multiple works (oneshots or chapters to bigger fics) that have gotten absolutely zero comments. none. nada. nothing. not even one. granted, full disclosure, I cried about it on tumblr and a couple of kind souls took pity on me and so not all of them are at zero currently, but the initial silence still hurt. there are fics that have been posted for months (or years) and are still at two comments, maybe three. on average I get three or four comments per fic. so I wouldn't exactly say I get great engagement. i know this is jealousy speaking but watching others get ten times that, easily, and not only on ao3 but also on tumblr… yeah it stings. I put my heart and soul into a fic, am excited to post it, am vibrating with enthusiasm… and then nothing. or a lukewarm response at best.

so idk, if "so many others" get enjoyment out of them, then why don't they tell me? I have gotten multiple messages along the lines of "oh you know i love all your fics!" and… how do i know? you never left a single comment and i'm not psychic! there's no way for me to know it. or people who send me a message saying they read everything i wrote and loved them… but didn't leave a single comment. how much did they actually enjoy the works if they couldn't be bothered to say it on even one damn fic? those messages are lovely, i do appreciate them, and they do make me smile. but at the same time i'd trade them for a single good comment on ao3 in a heartbeat. that's what's easily accessible and what i can go back to when i feel discouraged and unseen.

(also idk if i'm reading wrong between the lines but it feels like you're telling me you're for some reason keeping up with my shit while not actually enjoying it but ohh 'so many others do' at least? apologies if that's just my cranky morning brain misinterpreting things but ouch. that was kind of harsh.)

but it's also not only the amount of comments, it's also the substance. there are some fics that got (gasp!) four whole comments but they're all along the lines of "nice!" or "💖" and as much as those do make me smile when I get them (and I genuinely do appreciate them!) at the same time they are not feedback. they don't give me anything to work with. what did they like? was there something specific? please talk to me about it!

I'd kill to get actual feedback. it's the dream that people would notice the clever reference i made, or the beautiful sentence i wrote, or the way the beginning tied to the end. or tell me about the emotions the fic brought them, or the thoughts, or their favorite part, or idk. it's not like i get gushing messages on tumblr either, unlike some others, talking about a specific fic or whatever.

simply put, it's really fucking lonely, and if I wanna keep posting fics I'd need some kind of a motivating factor to make it worth the effort. for a while I had a friend who gave me plentiful feedback and I lived off of that, and it made it easier to deal with the scarcity of comments, but now that ship has sailed. so the lack of engagement from the rest of the fandom is more acutely felt.

i'm not saying this to guilt trip people or to nag. it's simply stating a fact. if posting fic isn't a positive experience, why should i keep doing it?