#idk I'm rambling
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Johnny likes to pick a random little coffee shop in whatever place the mission takes them and sit for hours sketching the people around him. Something about it is a ritual for him, settles him in this new place and reminds him that this is what he fights for, the freedom of people to go get themselves a fancy coffee after a hard day if that's what makes them happy.
The day he sees you his sketchbook has pages of you. He usually moves quickly between people and he didn't even realise that he wasn't until he gets back to base and Ghost has a look at his sketches as he always does.
"Fancy a tea tomorrow then?" he asks.
They go but it was a longshot, you're not there. They visit again a few times when they can, hope you'll walk in. Gaz and Price keep an eye out too once they see the sketches.
They don't know you but you become so familiar to them. They've never met you but their allies all know your face. You are just a regular person going about your day never knowing that sometimes you are what is keeping a soldier on another continent going. You criticise your appearance in the mirror unaware that you've become somewhat of a mythic creature, a divine thing, a good luck charm across special forces and PMCs and rebel groups. Your face that you are trying to learn to love has been replicated so many times on the pages of those who have fallen in love with it.
And maybe you never ever find out, or maybe one day you're watching a news piece showing barracks and see your face up on the wall. The reporter asks the man if that's his partner back home. He smiles softly and says he wishes that were the case, but it's just a person he saw in a coffee shop years ago that he has never been able to forget.
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truth coming out of her well to shame mankind vibes, spurred by fandom blogs on my dashboard being willfully obtuse.
intestinal and stomach cramps from a MALE body adjusting to heightened estrogen levels is not the same thing as menstruation, no matter what you ~feel~ in your heart. menstruation is this:
female hormones ebb and flow during the month, and each one has a specific FUNCTION that helps prepare the ovum for maturation, release, and dissolution when pregnancy doesn't occur. the cramps occur for a reason, because the body needs muscular help to expel the endometrium (the internal, blood-dense lining of the uterus). i know sex ed in most places is garbage, but that doesn't excuse a lack of curiosity.
#idk i'm rambling#i feel like i should change my original posts tag but whatever#radfem#gender critical#menstruation
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Reading Lou Sullivan's diaries as a gay trans man makes me feel so seen.
Like I view my gender as "gay man". I don't relate my gender to that of a straight man, and I definitely don't relate it to any form of womanhood or nonbinary-ness. And for so long it was scary and embarrassing and confusing. I felt like I was fetishizing gay men or trying to wiggle myself into some club.
But Lou feels the same way! The utter desperation he feels trying to be seen as a man and to be included in the gay male community is so fucking RELATABLE. And I cannot overstate how happy I am that he was seen as a gay man and was desired by other gay men, it gives me so much fucking hope.
#idk I'm rambling#i just relate to lou so much#being a gay kinky transguy is akin to holiness i think#trans#transgender#ftm#lou sullivan
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every time I hear someone say "oh you have to listen to Dear Evan Hansen it has such good mental health representation" I cry in Next to Normal
#next to normal#and yes this is based on a true story#generally I dont try to juck anyones jum so I of course didn't tell that person what I was thinking at that moment#and if someone found Dear Evan Hansen a useful text in terms of their own mental health journey who am I to discredit that#but this is the internet and I am back on the ntn train#in a way it is my saf autumn musical#and yes I am a survior of the 2017 Tony Awards why were you asking?#no but seriously#it is so interesting how many narrative devices Dear Evan Hansen took from Next to Normal#but turned them into a less complete piece#like Gabe in ntn is a representation of unadressed grief and trauma and the family has to accept that he will never be really gone#and connor is just...idk not fully thought out?#idk I'm rambling#but also#how the love story between Henry and Natalie means something#Natalie sees her parent's relationship and desperately doesn't want that for herself and Henry at the same time also stand for#a piece of normalcy that seems attainable#you don't sit there and think hu why is there this completely separate love story thrown in there?#it mirrors the problems#and dear evan hansen#do I even have to say it#I thnk the thing I resent it most for is that it has a love story#naja#I'm of listening to net to normal some more#sorry I someone who really likes deh stumbles accross this#I feel like espechially musicals can be something that can be so personal#and I don't actually want to contribute to more stuff like#ew why do you like this when theres xyz that is so much better or morally purer or whatever#I guess what I do want to say is: if I had a nickle for everytime they made a musical about mental health where theres a ghost on stage and#the sister of the dead kid falls in love with a funny guy while her family is falling apart
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There's something so funny to me whenever I see Trans!Logan Howlett headcanons in fics or fanart. Don't get me wrong, as a gnc person, I love the headcanon, I'm not saying it's silly (derogatory) but I keep trying to wrap my head around how it would work.
Because he has a regenerative healing factor. Could he have even had top surgery or would his tits have just kept regenerating? I've literally been trying to wrap my brain around this question for like four days since I saw a fanart of Logan with top surgery scars and I was like "but he doesn't scar????" Can someone with more creative braincells help me figure out how this would work????
#idk I'm rambling#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine#logan howlett#trans wolverine#deadpool headcanons#wolverine headcanons#dot says
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Pepperfig’s a tourist destination
#animal crossing#animal crossing new horizons#acnh#pepperfig#my island#kinda rolling with the idea that my island's no longer a secret paradise#it's been years and the town's progressed beyond that#makes me miss the big supermarket in new leaf#i actually really miss new leaf a lot in general#wish we had more community buildings#like a dang post office#and a lil bus stop or something#idk i'm rambling
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My controversial jjk take is that mahito should've remained the main threat/antagonist throughout the whole thing
#the thing with sukuna was that despite all his efforts to be a curse he was ultimately deeply human#and as powerful of a threat as he was that fact would never go away (which is why his ending was a sort of second chance/redemption)#same with kenjaku to an extent#kenjaku finally found someone to keep them entertained for a long. long time and not abandon them like tengen.#their reason to change was also deeply human they were very starved for company/connection in a way that most mortal humans couldn't provide#meanwhile mahito wants none of that#mahito's entire existence is an antithesis to every positive human emotion he literally is the only lasting permanent scars on yuuji#I feel like gege fumbled the human/curse dichotomy in the story the moment it became about people vs people#bc the story became way more focused on individual good and bad apples as apposed to the whole that it started out being about#I feel like gege bringing mahito back for the final conversation was him acknowledging this#gege could've still had gojo die by sukuna's hand and have the whole shinjuku showdown play out#but then it could've continued to be about the curses the story started out wamting to eradicate#sukuna was never the 'sole' only problem in the world he was merely an example of what this system makes#I feel like gege just gave up on those bigger picture themes for the purpose of shallower but character focused conclusions#which doesn't work for me at all tbh#the people who inherited the sorcery world might not be as bad as the original higher ups but they are NOT good#this is better but only just barely#jjk spoilers#jjk 271#idk i'm rambling
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Like the more new creative forms I try the more I realize how much a miracle it is that anything gets made at all because it all requires so much incredible effort and skill. Like for real even the most scuffed thing you've ever seen has hours and hours of effort and love put into it and I think that's beautiful
#nothing will make you appreciate the amateurs in a field more than trying that shit yourself and realizing oh god#a master at something will always look good at something but it then becomes insane how much more you appreciate their work once you try#the medium itself#idk I'm just thinking a lot now. making an amv and this shit is so hard but so rewarding#(amv of anime clips set to music not like a warriors amv just to be clear)#video editing is crazy man!! and yet so rewarding when I get like. less than 10 seconds to line up perfectly with what I see in my mind#it's me and my darling da Vinci resolve against the world#idk if I want to try color grading. that's scary. but it could help with continuity#and I think it's cool how much of my other knowledge from my previous work has carried over#mainly in where art/animation share rules with film in like shot composition and mood and such#like there's a really fast segment where I'm cutting between clips that are barely a second king and knowing the trick to keep it readable#has helped me so so much#so it's been at least a little easier where it's just me learning the tricks to the program itself#idk I'm rambling#synth.solo
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has anyone written a tangled wesper au becuase I friend just showed me a post about it and I have gone feral
like wylan is so tangled coded he can do music and sing and draw and is locked away by a gaslighting ass bitch and just wants to leave and escape his tower and then this hot flirty thief arrives and helps him escape they are literally perfect omg
#please writers i am begging you#wesper#wylan van eck#jesper fahey#i have no writing skills and it makes me so sad#and if it exists WHERE CAN I FIND IT OMG#im going feral help#also milo = maximus ???#and instead of the long hair healing his music heals#idk i'm rambling#im literally sobbing omg#fanfiction#wesper fanfic#it should be anyways
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sometimes i think about the language that some radfems use to describe bodies like mine and get angry. i don't think i can do anything to change their minds, but i can talk about how i feel.
i had top surgery six years ago, but i do not feel mutilated. i have been taking testosterone for seven years, but i do not feel gross or undesirable or disgusting. yes, i know i am a woman. this is the truth. but i am also transsexual, in the sense that i am socially read as male and took steps to appear that way.
i do not want to tell other dysphoric or detransitioned people how to frame their experiences with the medical industry, that is not the point of this post. but if you, personally, have not gone through these experiences, it is not your place to say whether or not i should be ashamed of my body. is that not what got us here in the first place?
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OUR LEGS TOUCHED AGAIN!! I REPEAT, OUR LEGS TOUCHED AGAIN!! And it wasn't like an, "oops, sorry" thing, either. They were pressing against each other with force, and I could actually feel him shaking he drinks wayyy too much caffeine
#and it wasn't just our knees#it was lower thigh all the way down to our feet#neither of us said anything about it#because there was a legitimate reason for him to be so close to me#but I feel like someone else may have moved their legs??#idk I'm rambling#male teacher crush#teacher and student#teacher crush community#male teacher x female student#teacher crush#teacher x student#male tc#teacher cc#s#teacher confessions#teacher#male teacher#tc#tc blog#tcc feelings#tc crush#tcc#tc community#tccblr#tcc tumblr#tc feelings#tc confessions
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“This time around, I’m finally seeing you.”
I think Endeavor’s finally realizing Touya is his son? Which…he should’ve realized it this entire time but he’s been so clouded by his need to be Number 1 and better than All Might and have children who can exceed AM’s level that he hasn’t seen his children for who they are—but really, he hasn’t even appreciated any of his kids as they are or for who they’ve become and what their quirks can do because he’s been so far up his own ideals.
The start of the war with Touya’s reveal, the hospital family meeting with Rei and the kids, and now these final battles, plus all of Touya’s monologues, plus the fights between Shouto and Touya, and Touya coming back again and again…
I think all of this finally managed to shake him out of his own cloud so he can finally see his family as his family and not tests and lab equipment. (The fact that it took all of this for Enji to get it just highlights how deep he was in his warped sea and state of mind.)
idk I’m rambling but perhaps this means that now, much too late, as Touya’s racing toward him engulfed in white hot flames, E doesn’t see an experiment or even a villain, but his son
#bnha#bnha 376#touya todoroki#todoroki touya#endeavor#bnha manga spoilers#bnha analysis#bnha meta#listen the todoroki family is my fave#idk i'm rambling#bnha manga#mha manga spoilers#mha manga#mha#enji todoroki#todoroki shouto#shouto todoroki#toya todoroki#mha meta#mha analysis
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William becoming Dave is the in-universe(?) equivalent to springtrap becoming scraptrap
Like you look between spring and scrap and are like 'what a downgrade' well that's officer burke in Ch 12 looking at Dave
You all know I like Dave and William equally but I just mean appearance wise they (william and spring) start off and broad and intimidating and then get all scraggy and ugly
All of these characters are the same person
#idk I'm rambling#still not mentally 100% so this may not make sense#dave miller#scraptrap#william afton
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last year i didn't even care about music that much like i vividly remember when i got my spotify wrapped and the whole list was full of songs i did not recognize because i had only listened to music while drunk, offering my devices to everyone going like "yeah just put anything on the queue" and that list of unfamiliar songs made me go "yeah okay i guess i'll try listening to more music next year"
and you can be damn sure i would've never predicted i would nine months later be clinically obsessed with a slovenian indie rock band and an estonian rapper and some guy from vantaa
#least of all i would've never expected to go to more than ten gigs AND A FESTIVAL in a year#like wow what have i become#i'm also very grateful bc i've met so many amazing ppl because of this 🫶#it's just so wild to think about#like yeah i listened to music sometimes but like#i didn't fully get it#now i do#joker out#tommy cash#käärijä#music#idk i'm rambling
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This might be a hot take but trans people should be allowed to be upset when they get misgendered.
I see a lot of trans people say that trans people never get angry or upset by being misgendered/dead named or that we're always understanding when someone messes up. But like, that's not always true.
No one ever expects cis people to be calm and understanding when they get misgendered or called the wrong name. Even if a trans person doesn't even say anything to the person that misgendered them and are just quietly upset by themselves, that is seen as a bad thing.
Like sometimes we get upset at things, just like everyone else. We get angry and sad. I'm just so tired of trans people not being able to have "negative" emotions just because we'd be setting a poor example for the trans community.
#idk I'm rambling#I'm just tired of it#sometimes i get angry bc someone misgenders me. that's normal and im tired of pretending it's not#this was brought about by rembering the trans woman at GameStop that got mad when the cashier kept misgendering her after she corrected him#countless times. i hope she's having a good day.#and also that trans boy that threw a desk at his transphobic classmate. good for him tbh#trans#transgender#lgbt#ftm#mtf#nonbinary
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it sucks being an arcane fan and seeing people misunderstand marcus's character as a whole. in my eyes his scenes with his daughter are less to make us feel bad for him and are more for us to simply understand why he's still doing the shit he's doing. say whatever you want but if I had to do shady corrupted ass dealings to keep my family safe I probably would out of sheer terror, so while I fully think marcus dug his grave I can understand why he couldnt just rebel against silco. marcus as a character reminds me of the simple human fact that everyone wants to change the world but most ppl arent actually willing to sacrifice what they have to do it.
#it speaks#like it's either let your child die at the hands of a kingpin or just do what the kingpin wants and hopefully he'll keep yall alive#people love pretending that they'd jump in front of a bullet for someone but no one knows what they'd do in the actual scenario#ultimately I like marcus as a chr bcuz hes just so human. he fucks up bcuz he was trying to do what he thought was right and has to deal#with the consequences for the rest of his life#or at least until he died at the hands of silcos daughter when he was trying to protect his own#idk my thoughts on this show are just so much and so jumbled I feel like I could never explain it#but marcus's whole 'just a person trying to do what they think is right but failing' is like. the crux of the whole show#idk i'm rambling#arcane#marcus#I don't think i got a tag for him cuz no one cares enough abt him to make fanart or write meta. I care enough tho <3#love ur character marcus you made ur fuckin bed and now ur dead
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