#icb this was meant to be a smutty thread my my my how things have changed

[hvrtbroken]

her voice is strong in a way that indicates maybe she's been strong for too long . nico's eyes find her and he looks at her with anything but pity : admiration , determination , the smallest bit of understanding he can muster . " then i hate him , too . " nico says back because that's how easy it always has been . even long before the pair were anything - nico found it easy to agree with star on most things . if she didn't like how a meeting went , didn't like an executive , hated an outfit they wanted to put her in . . . NICO ALWAYS UNDERSTOOD , because star is not a woman who complains for no reason . she's got her own back because she's always had to . star's always the first and last to bring up her ex . nico never pushes or pries , because he wouldn't even know how to , but every piece she gives him shows that the bigger picture is still an open wound that pains her . he isn't sure if he's ever HEARD her say she hates anyone before, but he takes it as seriously as if she said ' i need to go home right ' .

at her sudden apology , nico's eyebrows raise . he isn't sure completely what she's apologising for , but then she moves up and brushes her lips to his as if she can't quite stop herself . a quiet noise leaves nico . startled . his eyes are ablaze as she leans back down , soft heels digging into the grass belong them . " star - " nico goes to say , but she's apologising again and again , yet still leaning up . her mouth is red and smooth . it finds his , and he relaxes for a moment right into it . the familiarity of it . he could kiss her one thousand times a day and still want more . the real crime would be to never kiss her again . nico feels her arm snake around the back of him . his own hands idle by his side awkwardly before they gently find her hips , skin touching that silk dress he's been trying to ignore all night .

" star . " he whispers it out again , stilted . he hasn't quite leaned back into any kiss yet . has allowed her to kiss him because he'd allow her to do anything really . his eyes reopen and he uses them to dance along where they are . still abandoned . just him , her and the moon . but his mind twists . his stomach knots itself . " hey . " he pulls back from her , eyes finding her . there's nobody here . that's for sure . but that's not what this is about . nico opens his mouth . closes it . he isn't too sure how to say this next part exactly because he's never cared enough about a girl to really FEEL like there's more pressing things at bay ( besides touching them ) . " . . i don't think we should do this when you're thinking about your ex . " he lets out finally . his gaze drops from hers , and he gestures around unsurely . the fountain . her hate . the cheating . HE LIKES HER TOO MUCH FOR THAT . it feels wrong to do this , right now , in this space , after what she's just told him . AFTER HOW SHE FEELS .

why does it feel like the universe is testing her? for what, she doesn't know, but what she does know is that her limbs are straining, wanting nico closer. to feel him pressed to her, lips on skin, hands skimming over the bend of her spine. yet, she knows, they can't. ( even if the back of her head complains, pointing out that they're alone, truly alone here. ) still, even just like this, star feels okay. telling him something she didn't even admit to herself until right then. and maybe that's what matters. "i hate him." knows she brought him up, but wants to drop the topic altogether. feels anger well up in her throat, for the years of torment, before during and after their relationship. for the years she spent avoiding it, never facing it head on. for bringing it up when she's with nico right now. ( maybe it's time to try therapy again. )

he laughs and suddenly she feels better. his laugh could cure her, probably, from anything. any ailment or issue. plus, the impression of him is still there, on her lips. pulsing pleasant and present. she feels it drive her heartbeat faster, almost pounding, the smell of him lingering in her senses. 'are you okay ?' "why wouldn't i be? i'm here with you," she replies, smiling softy. and it's no lie. she doesn't feel the dread she'd so adamantly ignored before this, keeping her away from a place she'd cherished and let herself breathe in. she stares at him silently for a few long moments, dark eyes skimming over his features, taking him in. she feels her chest squeeze in a specific, overwhelming way, a mess of words jumbling in her head. how is she supposed to evr be normal around him?

"i'm sorry." the apology comes first because byeol knows what she's about to do. knows she can't hold herself back anymore, feels everything in her being surge her forward, wanting — needing nico. she leans up, squeezing his hands, allowing the tension to still between them; thick, heady, and present. then, finally, star brushes her lips to his. slow, but solid. gentle, yet greedy. "'m sorry," she whispers the apology again against his lips, hands slipping from his so she can snake her arms around his neck. knows she shouldn't be doing this, knows they're at work. but she can't help it anymore. "sorry." she murmurs the word weakly as she opens her mouth, tongue seeking out his. she's just a woman with her lover, standing beside a beautiful fountain.