#i've killed all my plants and that was not according to plan

[avaritia-ffxiv]

✦ people i'd like to know better ✦

tagged by @captainqster

last song i listened to: Turmion Kätilöt - Kirottujen karnevaalit. It's the song I mangled lyrics from for Giovanna's latest gpose 'cause I needed something aggressive for her GNB Vibe (2016 version of it or something I think?)

But Turmion Kätilöt is one of my fave bands, their lyrics are fabulous.

favorite color: Gotta say red.

currently watching: Uhhh some random YouTube doc about Jojo Siwa. I recognized the name from a prior YouTube video so I was like "oh what's this".

I don't really watch a lot of things, mostly YouTube bs.

sweet/savoury/spicy?: Sweet probably. I don't really like eating tho.

relationship status: Maxed on manageable amount of friendships.

last thing you googled: "define wreaths". I wasn't sure about the spelling.

current obsession: I've obsessed over FFXIV for... A few years. Mainly Gia and his versions from there now, but yeah. Not a lot of room for anything else; I've never been one of those people that are any good at splitting their attention.

tagging @vmbral, @cosmicharm @ishgard @midnightmagicks @soulshards-ooc uhhhhh idk who hasn't done this or gotten tagged yet

[ryanscabinlife]

I can't believe it's been a month since I posted the May garden update. A lot of things has happened. Loads of wins and also plenty of failures. I guess I'll start with the progress of the ones I featured last month.

The hardneck garlic that overwintered are just about ready to be harvested. According to online sources, garlics can be harvested about a month after the scapes emerges. I was delighted to see the scapes as I was taking pics this morning. Can't wait to collect and make something out of them.

Oh tomatoes. I talked about how our weather has been awful many of times on this blog. After the dry May, they started showing some damaged on their leaves, and since they barely saw the sun this month, they did not grow very much. I panicked so I bought 30 more roma seedlings and 6 more cherry tomatoes. After a few days of sun, all of them are bouncing back to life and looking very healthy. Now I'm stuck with 60 romas and 12 cherries. Not the worst problem to have, really. All corners of the garden have tomatoes planted in them.

The beds where the trellis is sitting is now filled with plants. All of the beans and peas are looking great. The snow peas are about 4 ft tall and there's plenty of beans on the ground. The luffa that I was so excited about, none of them showed up. I bought a packet of 10 seeds for a whopping $4.99 and only 1 germinated. I'm currently babying it and waiting for the perfect time to transplant it. The cucumber is the other one I'm totally having hard time with. So far I've already used up the whole packet, and so far I have seen none. I planted the last 6 seeds yesterday but I'm not holding my breath. We have a neighbour (I'm using the word neighbour very loosely here, they're about 5km from us) who have a small road-side stand and in the summer they sell cucumbers. I think I'm just gonna have to rely on them for cucumbers.

The potatoes (all 30ft row) are doing extremely well. Some of them suffered from light frost and their early leaves died but they all bounced back. I think next year, I'll plant them even earlier.

It looks like the apple or crabapple (I still don't know) tree had a couple of successful pollinations. I think the reason for the lack of blooms is because the tree has been neglected and unkept for a long time. I've already been researching and watching a ton of videos on how to properly prune apple trees so I can prune it next spring in hopes that it will put out more blooms next year.

The border is looking a bit sad. Something to be expected on the first year due to the fact that most of the plants I have in it are perennials. I think they'll live though, I can only hope that they come out stronger next year. Looking closely, the wildflowers that I broadcasted are out. I see hundreds of them. I've added two smaller beds, I'm hoping to fill them up with the annual seedlings I'm currently growing. No progress at all on the potted garden in the background.

The brassicas are my favourites but also the main cause of my headaches. Thank god I have seeded a good amount of extras because these bitches have plethora of enemies! The first to attack was slugs. They destroyed a handful of seedlings (100% my fault coz I decided to plant them too young). I battled this with non-stop weeding and slug hunting. So far it's been working, I just go in early in the morning, remove all of the slugs and the weeds they hide into. Then the rabbits. I did not plan to build a fence this year but after the rabbit attack that ate almost half of the original plants, I decided to build a fence around the garden. Again, so far it's working. Then just when they start actually growing, the damn flea beetles happened. Yesterday, I ordered some food grade diatomaceous earth. I'm aware that it will kill all of the insects it will come across with whether they're good or bad but I guess I'll just have to be careful not to put it on any of the flowering crops so it doesn't kill the pollinators. Next year, to avoid using such measure, I plan to install netting on all of the leafy veggies. I don't wanna do that now because it will just trap in the ones I already have in.

Speaking of flea beetles and brassicas, these godforsaken creatures killed all of the arugulas and boy choy I planted at the end of April. I then replanted them a couple of weeks ago and lo and behold, all of them are damaged again. I'm leaving them on the bed for now to hopefully serve as food for the pests and in hopes that I'll be able to trap and kill them once the diatomaceous earth arrives. I'll try to grow them again in the fall when the temperature starts going down with netting. But for now, I planted some of my extra tomatoes to keep this spot occupied.

To my surprise, the asparagus are doing exceedingly well. Can't wait for 2025 when I can finally harvest some.

I have 3 tomatillos that survived and they're doing well. They're planted with the original cherry tomatoes and celery.

3 weeks ago, I though these celery plants were dead, but they managed to come back.

Peanut, another big failure. I planted a whole row of peanuts parallel to the row of potatoes. 30 ft of it and roughly 40 seeds, 3 germinated, 2 out of those 3 got devoured by slugs. So now I have ONE peanut plant. I scattered few sage and pepper seeds in the area as replacement. Let's see what happens.

After the small radish harvest yesterday, these is what's left. I'm gonna give them a week or so until I pull them all out. In preparation for their departure, I have okras and eggplants growing in between rows. I've already replanted the okra and eggplants a couple of times because slugs and birds keep on eating them. To avoid that, I just covered them with recycled plastic cups as protection for now.

On the same bed as the radish, okra, and eggplants are the softneck garlic. It's more or less an experiment. I was just curious if they actually produce garlic bulbs at the end of growing season. The garlic cloves I used are from Costco. They're not looking too bad.

Next bed over (where I have the failed arugula and bokchoy) are onions. I bought a pack of a hundred bulbs and shoved all of them in this bed. They just started emerging.

Next bed after that (my biggest one) are corn, zucchini, and butternut squash. The corns are doing alright. I dealt with poor germination with both of the squashes and when they show up, birds eats them. Nothing much I could do other than keep replanting seeds and protecting the seedlings with plastic cups. Looks like the ones I have at the moment are gonna make it.

Next bed after that are carrots. I planted these back in April, and this is what they look like now. They sure to take their sweet time to germinate.

25-Jun-2023

[dopepoisonivyoncrack]

So I've been told that for the theoretical part of the thesis I must write a synthesis of the scientific literature 'from Jesus Christ to present day', encompassing all that is known about the plant and relevant to my study, and was shown as an example a thesis on 1 species, that didn't had much info available when it was written.

I did just that, a synthesis of scientific literature from the first mentions to present day.... for each of the 4 species in my study. As one can imagine, the length of that theoretical part is now 4x times the length of a regular thesis. It also took 4x times longer to write, especially since I wasn't given much time and energy to work on it properly. It is also actually detailed, in comparison to what I now see in other similar theses.

It was brought to my attention that I foolishly worked myself to death against all odds, to meet an idealistic objective of the theoretical part of a ph.D thesis, while everyone else just writes a relative junk paper of a bit over 100 pages at most to get it over with and receive the title.

What is worse, is that my collaborators didn't do their part according to my research plan and now my results barely meet half of my research objectives. I fear that in the end, I can't even be proud of the end material. Idk what I want more, to kill myself or the people that lied to me, drained me with stupid tasks and couldn't give less of a crap about me, and now dare to blame me for not "knowing my priorities" , accuse me of procrastination and incompetence a.s.o.

Research can't be done alone, but christ alive if one can trust people in this world or even be left to work in peace

[millerflintstone]

(a submission from @wormholeprophet ) FYI it seems like DeSantis didn’t kidnap that kid and the kid talked extensively about shooting up his school and stab people to his peers online? I’ve seen a lot of retractions from people who were reblogging this story recently.

I'm not crazy about the header the OP of that post, @moonfrosttheelf , used. I just reblogged with the most recent tweet from Rebekah Jones at the time. I did not think that reblog of mine would go anywhere since the only posts I share that gain any popularity are those of my cat.

Anyway ...

Her kid was arrested. That is true. If I was the mother of an autistic teen, and this happened to me, would I use the term 'kidnap'? Unsure. I don't have kids on purpose and can't speak to that.

It seems her son is back home with her.

Things do seem fishy with how all this went down.

Here's the link to the Miami Herald article about this situation. What the Yahoo article you submitted to my account, @wormholeprophet , doesn't talk about is what I've bolded below:

The boy was interviewed by sheriff’s deputies on March 23 and shown the memes, which he acknowledged sharing, the report said. The youth is not being named to protect his privacy.

One meme — part of a viral series — pictures a brain with intrusive thoughts about grabbing an officer’s gun, knowing that the result could be fatal. “Every time I see school security,” the boy wrote when he sent the meme, according to the warrant.

Authorities say he also posted another meme described in the warrant as “an individual with a shaved head holding a Hi-C drink. The message on the meme was “I’m feeling so silly I might shoot up a building full of people.”

He told the deputies at the time he had no plans to do anything, they noted in the report. A deputy told his parents it seemed like a “teenager” thing before leaving without making an arrest, a video of the exchange showed. Deputies did not question him about the more disturbing social media posts attributed to him in this week’s arrest report.

It’s unclear whether the deputies were aware of the messages, which were uncovered by a warrant to search his Snapchat account. The messages listed in the warrant involved threats of violence, including attacks on schoolchildren.

Feb. 9: “I want to shoot up the school.”

Feb. 12: “If I get a gun I’m gonna shoot up hnms lol” — an apparent reference to Holley Navarre Middle School, which the youth had previously attended.

Feb. 12: “I always keep a knife on me so maybe I’ll just stab ppl.”

Feb. 12: “…I have no hope in getting better, so why not kill the losers at school.”

An unredacted version of the warrant, obtained by the Herald, shows the threatening messages were sent by a username that was different than the one Jones��� son used to send the memes.

The document does not say how authorities determined both usernames are linked to the same account. The redacted version circulated by authorities does not reveal that there were two different usernames involved.

Jones provided a screenshot of her son’s account, which showed he changed to his current username in January, before the threats were made. She said he has never used the handle associated with the threatening messages.

Is the other username actually her kid or is it a plant? I don't know. Is this kid truly troubled and a danger? I also do not know.

I'd be interested in reading the unredacted warrant myself because the Yahoo article is very loosey-goosey with how they phrase things, specifically this - "The teenager told one of his friends that he planned to shoot up the school the Thursday before Spring Break but there were too many things going on so he postponed it until March 31."

Is there additional proof to back this up? Is the character of this friend on hyper focus like it is for Rebekah Jones? How much of this statement from the "friend" is speculation and how much is verifiable? Is the message from the account Jones is saying is not her kid's account?

I do wonder about the raid that was performed on their house by Florida agents when he was 11. I wonder how that act and having guns possibly pointed at him then at such a young age affected him. It seems he's gone through additional trauma, according to Jones's post on substack [x]

As for the raid, here's a link to what I'm talking about, if you are not aware [x]

[the-traitorous-prince]

So Azure, what's your plans for Heaven?

I'm glad you're taking an interest Mortal! I have big plans for Heaven and earth once I am the emperor!

Or do you mean how I'll be gaining power?

I'll answer both!

For taking over heaven thank the buddha that Nezha found us. He's being very helpful.

The plan is a sneak attack. We'll strike before anyone suspect anything. According to Nezha the Jade Emperor is very weak and has been dying for centuries. He's not nearly as strong as he was in the past. Same as the armies; there haven't been any serious threats for probably a millennia now. They're unprepared for real battle.

We'll get in, kill the emperor, and take his power before anyone can prepare or fight back.

Originally I was going to go speak to my brother, the Bull Demon King, but the lotus prince advised us against that; apparently he has a wife and son now. And his wife is a celestial spirit. So she probably wouldn't take kindly to her husband trying to invade her natal home.

I do wonder how that marriage happened; once we've secured our standing I'll have to give him a visit. I cannot wait to meet my sworn nephew.

Well, other sworn nephew; I've already met MK.

MK is... He doesn't seem like a threat, but he's very powerful in his own way. I was going to use him to free my brothers, but Nezha already helped with that! He was able to go into the scroll and get them both out. As a celestial he was able to navigate far easier than that young mortal boy.

MK is still in the scroll, along with Wukong. They'll both be there for awhile. Hopefully long enough to stay out of the way until we're on the throne.

Now once we have the throne we'll have to keep everyone in line. I don't desire to threaten anyone, or rule by fear. But it will be necessary.

Nezha will pretend to try and fight us after we take the throne. We'll stage a fight where he loses without causing anyone actual harm, and use him as a hostage to keep heaven in line until we can get a better grasp on things.

Nezha will be completely unharmed; He'll also be able to talk down anyone who tries to raise arms.

Meanwhile we'll use that time to make improvements to heaven and earth. Repeal their barbaric laws, repeal exiles, release those unfairly imprisoned, allow those of lower ranks chances to rise if they're loyal.

On earth we'll use the emperors power to help grow plants, fix droughts, stop wars, and whatever else we need to do.

We have big plans for all the realms; and we've waited long enough.

[cli-meme]

Kicking off a mass extinction Just to cover it up? What is wrong with some people Well, guess it worked well enough Yay you won Here's your dead planet I don't get it man Maybe it's a good thing that I don't

Just, Say they get what they wanted You know, Set off various resource wars Hop into their bunkers Put people in collars And have them work for them Say, it goes all according to plan They're safe now They've got a mind controlled farm Of worker ants Okay yay Uh You're a dumbass. Fucks wrong with you You're gonna die in like. 2 years tops It'll smell like shit You'll be hungry Everyone will die in a bit Like. Congrats on your few years of glory Was it even worth it? Did you even really decide it? Or were you just running From your consequences?

Secondly, We haven't even got the science for it. We don't. We straight up don't. We can't create a system that is Self sustaining growing food forever I've studied the subject And talked to the people who do it And we haven't figured out SEEDS yet How the fuck are we gonna make a whole Ecosystem?! With animals and plants that Take years and years to grow???

Then do it underground?? Or in SPACE???

Can barely stop Earth from dying Oh, hey, Let's make a whole other Earth using uhhh Absolutely nothing You realise only tiny amounts of the Earth Are biodiverse enough that they might be Good examples but even then they're all Dying Because you killed everything Before it could teach you anything about surviving. You idiot

And even then Look, are they gonna even live long enough? For the bunkers? Realistically The less they cut back The faster it hits So they're burning their future, thinking They'll die before the consequences And thinking they'll die of OLD AGE... And it's like. dude You have 20 years left at LEAST Please destroy the world when you are 99 If thats your plan So you have a chance of dying beforehand

Like Are they stupid, or is it just me? Is this even their thought process? Do they even think? I think my entire spiel answers that I don't even know if they thought out the bunker thing as much as I did. Anyway, they're literally Killing themselves Via way of self species extinction To see the funny money number go up You have to be a real moron to do that

[alphascnsual]

As the two finally exited Alexander's office; they were the image of a glowing pair- all smiles and pure delight. Nobody could guess from looking at the two that one of them was a cold-blooded serial killer and the other was under a months-long hypnotically induced sex haze. Alexander made quick. precise work of cleaning the office- using bleach wipes and neatening everything back to where it had been before their tryst, erasing any evidence of Connor being there. He then gathered the very few important items from his office- namely his laptop and his file on Connor; those were the only two things that connected him to anything more than being a regular counsellor. He stored both things in an expensive leather briefcase that held everything else he truly needed, which again, was minimal as the sociopath had planned and lived carefully to appear normal but was prepared to disappear without a trace at a moment's notice.

The campus was quiet- since the killings had ramped up so much, people were afraid to simply be out-and-about on their own so nobody was really around to see the two leaving together. Nobody noticed Alexander walking his mindless lover to his dorm room to help collect his bare essentials. He couldn't help but run a hand along Connor's bed, "The amount of times I've watched you jerk off right here ..." he mused with a smile, "The amount of times I've slipped in here to steal your underwear or smell your pillowcase ..." he sighed blissfully as though he spoke of the most normal, delightful memories. "Just toss your things in here-" he instructed, snapping out of his daze for a bit to focus on the task at hand and tossing a black duffel bag on the bed, "Don't worry- We'll get you much nicer things; things fit for my beautiful bitch boy," he smiled, "We just need to make it look like you left of your own accord in case somebody decides to be a pain and come snooping," he explained with a sigh, now and then shaking his head and letting the younger boy know what to pack and what to abandon, leaving only college study-related items and other things that were unimportant. Connor's purpose in life would be him from now on, he wouldn't have need for material belongings.

He opened Connor's laptop while the other packed and emailed administration a notice that he was leaving the school and quitting his program before snapping the device closed and tossing it into the bag as well- he'd destroy it eventually, anything that could be used to trace Connor's whereabouts from this point would soon be taken care of. Once they were packed, including the spyware he'd planted across the dorm room, Alexander resisted the powerful urge to fuck Connor again as an poetic 'goodbye' to his former life and as a fulfilment to the fantasy he'd long had of doing that right here while watching the other through his secret cameras but his emotionless, computer-like brain told him they didn't have the time and it was risky to contaminate a scene with their joined DNA and also there was no time to waste.

Soon, Alexander escorted them to his vintage but unassuming vehicle, loading their belongings into the back, opening the door to usher Connor into the passenger seat, and then letting himself in and taking off into the early evening light. Once they'd hit the highway, it was all Connor could do not to let out a massive yell of accomplishment; he'd done it. He'd actually fucking done it. He looked over at Connor with a wicked grin and took his hand, kissing the back of it. All these long, arduous months of careful planning and ruthless killing had paid off- he'd won his prize. Connor was his and his alone. The thrill and the realization of it all were some of the first and only things Alexander had ever really felt and that was how his brain convinced him that this wasn't some heinous crime or psychopathic spiral- this was destiny. His blood was pumping and the excitement now manifested itself in another way ...

"Baby ..." he cooed over to Connor, "Be a good little boy and take care of this, will you?" he hummed casually before using his free hand that wasn't on the steering wheel and reaching it behind Connor's head, then pulling the other down and across their seats so that the other's head was in his lap, face-to-face with a his hard and pulsing crotch, still tucked beneath the layers of his clothing, "Remember ... 'No thoughts ... only Master's cock'."

Connor knew he had lost this fight. His deepest desires, the carnal needs that went beyond all reason, had won out. At least for now - but did it make a difference? Even if his suppressed consciousness, the part of him that was able to form enough proper thoughts to see Alexander for what he was and what he'd done, was to regain enough strength to take back over - a line had been crossed that he couldn't come back from. He had given himself up, had allowed a monster, a psychopath to claim him, to use and take his body and turn him from an abstract object of desire into a very real 'lover', for lack of a better term. In Alexander's twisted mind, Connor surely was exactly that. And in the boy's subconsciousness that had been pulled to the forefront? This man wasn't a psychopath, not a murderer. He was a protector, the one he needed to submit and devote himself to, because that would equate pure bliss. No worries, no fears. No thoughts. The only need he felt was to be taken by Alexander, to be fucked, and while his own body convulsed and came, he felt his only true need fulfilled in the same moment. Alexander's seed filling him, pushing his struggling consciousness once again way back into the locked away parts of his psyche.

His fear, his terror, his disgust - not at Alexander, but himself - was drowned out by bliss, the endorphines flooding his system making Connor push away the horror he should feel at the fact that he'd just had climaxed to the gigantic cock of his friends' murderer pounding him like a living sex doll. Alex's words echoed in his brain like a mantra - no thoughts, no worries. Only the other man. Only being made to feel this ecstatic bliss, only being kissed. Connor did not respond, only smiling softly with his gaze feeling absent, only a whimper coming from the brunette when the larger man pulled out of him. An anxious young man like Connor wasn't exactly having a lot of sex these days, and certainly not with a man as hung and virile as the therapist, leaving the student feel rather empty, almost disappointed at the sensation of the other's seed spilling out of his tightness, clenching his entrance not to lose Alexander's gift, eagerly licking every last drop off of the man's fingers when he fed the cum to him.

He heard every word Alexander said, although seeming rather absent-minded upon the madman's monologue about finding them a proper home. Connor's instinctive urge to flee, to run from the other and go to the police, had resigned for the moment, barely struggling to even come to the forefront of the young man's mind. Instead, he smiled with oddly empty eyes, happy that all his reasons for worry and anxiety were gone. He let Alexander dress him, still feeling the warmth of the man's cum inside him, and internalized the sociopath's words as he repeated them like he was being indoctrinated. "Nothing else matters except being a good boy for Master." Humming happily, he nodded as Alex said it was time to go - not that Connor had any clue where they were going. That wasn't for him to worry about. Master would take care of it.

[robin-in-a-hoodie]

Hello, i am very Jewish and i listen to ghost quartet too much and I've had a thought about it lately.

Consider, ghost quartet is a Sukkot story

So for the uninitiated, Sukkot is a week long holiday where we build a little hut as a memory to living in little huts in the fourty years in the desert thing, it's one of the high holidays but it's also the least thematically relevant to the season, it's also officially the time we pray for rain, it's the official end of summer kind of thing, there's a lot happening in it

See, this lack of thing makes it so there's no real way to have a story for the holiday? Like. There's no real tale we can just have the same way other holidays do. But i come here to argue ghost quartet is a Sukkot story.

So one of the themes of the holiday is that there's four plants we gather together and wave in six directions, each plant representative of a type of person, them coming together is the people coming together, waving is to signify god around us everywhere.

Person one, citrus, who has both taste and smell, is a person who has both knowledge of the Torah (religion and stuff) and what I'll call kindness? A carying for others, kind of goodness

Person one is pearl

All her versions seem to be aware of the mechanism of the universe, that life is constantly happening to them in different ways. She's the one telling the story, she's the one asking others if they remember yet, she's the one who tells us what dying feels like, she's knowledgeable. She's also kind, giving the honey as the soldier, giving the star dust as the story teller, smiling for the camera for the ghost picture, she wants to help rose even when it leads to het death because she cares.

Person two, the palm tree that grows dates, has taste and no smell. That person knows a lot and doesn't have kindness

Person two is Brett

So our man "practices a lot" which in show is a short hand for religious. He's also the dude screaming about the apocalypse with a bible in hand, as well as being the one to actually exchange information with pearl ("they had kids you know"), not to mention he can talk to the dead according to the song of the astronomer.he also turns pearl's remains into a fiddle, he has skill and craft tied to music, which in the play is holy. Clearly knowledgeable man in the religious and spiritual stuff. He also shoves a girl to the train track, leaves his parents as soon as his sister dies, mocks his father, has plans of selling drugs, lies to rose just to get some honey, kills the story teller, you get it. He's a bad man. Brilliant, knowledgeable, practices a lot, but bad man.

Person three, Myrtle plant, has smell and no taste. I'm sure you'll be shocked to find out, this is a person with no knowledge but who is kind.

Person three is David

So he has an entire song about not "practicing" which, again, is to say he's not religious. Sure, he'd like to be, but he doesn't actually do the job of practicing his spirituality, he's guessing there might be a ghost behind the door and tries playing music for it but so far it doesn't look like there's much truth to that, he doesn't even know why monk would still be in this ralm. He's basically just guessing, possibly an extension of him wanting to be a spiritual person but failing at it. On the other hand, he's a nice dude (we'll get to him also being a bad boyfriend don't worry) he thinks of his dad tacking him in when he drinks, trying to relate to the man, he cares for his wife and reads to her to help her calm down, he tries talking to his kids and giving them actual advice and relating to them ("it's a big house, i know it gets lonely but we're afraid rose is holding you back from playing with the other kids" "my son get away, don't ever look back"), hell the man thinks there might be a ghost around and decides to play for him because he was a musician, even though it physically hurts him. He gives pearl her final rest by fishing her from the pond, he's a kind dude

The forth person, willow, has no taste or smell. I assume you can imagine, it's a person who doesn't do religion or kindness.

Person four is my beloved, rose red.

She lies to a soldier to take the honey, she doesn't help pearl not get murdered by a train because she needs to take a picture, she lies to the story teller saying she definitely cares about her suffering, she kills her sister, she tells her parents that they can die already and see she's right, you know the play. She also isn't interested in religion, like sure she's good with describing what she sees in the stars in a meaningful way but she has no real ties with music other than dancing when she was younger, she doesn't really know about her other lives, she just kinda. Does what's best for her and that's it.

The ritual is about all of these coming together, again and again, uniting as people and just kinda. Vibin' at whatever higher power there is. The play is about these four types of people, coming together again and again, interacting, contemplating the world and existence and religion and the meaning of life and the past and the present. If that's not vibin' in all directions of god, what is?

But wait, there's more!

The two types of people i marked down for kindness do bad things. I do think it's possible for people who are genuinely kind people who genuinely care for others to be kinda shitty, for their own reasons. Maybe she really loved this man and didn't want to live without him even at the cost of her sister, maybe she was scared of hurting her too much to let her know he doesn't love her. Maybe he was so desperate to be anything close to spiritual he felt like stealing rose's words is the only thing he can do, if not being spiritual himself at least looking like he has some knowledge. Being a kind person does not mean not being shitty sometimes, it just means that for the most part, you do care for others at least as much as you do yourself.

So is that it? No, of course not

There's also the wind and rain and other water referenced all the time in the play, and this holiday is also a water holiday, the beginning of rain season, we call for the rains to come this time. We ask the wind and rain to come.

There's also the existential themes of it all, being part of the high holidays means it is inherently related to matters of higher being, regrets, trying to think, what could i have done better? What can i do better? Who did i harm? How do i change? Am i who i want to be? It's the closing holiday of the season, it's officially the end if the time of year dedicated to these concerns, it's the last few seconds before the gates of the heavens close and it's time to move back into the more material world.

There's also the feeling that these characters don't have a set home. They're played by the same actors, flowing in and out of their times and their spaces, weaving into each other's stories, their homes are in flux, they're wondering the desert for fourty years, lying down in a makeshift hut that has a roof through which you can still see the stars.

In conclusion, ghost quartet is a Sukkot story.

[tomicaleto]

“ i’d follow you to the bitter end; as i always have. ” damn these sentence 😩💚

Okay okay so I've been listening to epic music from animes when I commute to classes so these two finally gave me the chance to write a loose scenario to go with the music that would otherwise have remained in my head forever.

From this prompt list!

Warning for main character death

“I'd follow you to the bitter end; as I always have.” & “Well. For whatever it’s worth, it’s been a pleasure fighting alongside you.”

The campaign had not been going according to any plan. Their information had been faulty at best and now they were fighting for their lives while wildly outnumbered. As he deflected blaster shots to the best of his abilities, Anakin’s brain was frantically trying to come up with a way of saving most of his men and Ahsoka, who were fighting several meters behind himself and Rex. 

His right hand man, loyal to a fault, had refused to stay behind the safety of their cannons, where most troopers were, in order to cover Anakin’s back.  

The planet they were fighting in was arid, with mountains all around them and thistle as the main vegetation. There were no important resources to be found there and if there was some type of fauna to be discovered, the battlefield had probably prompted most specimens to keep hidden. 

The Republic had most likely already given up on a planet like this, once the information that the minerals to be found in the mountains had been revealed was a ruse. But it would have been too late for the 501st, who had been deployed months before and had been now caught in the middle of a fire site for weeks. 

If Anakin didn’t come up with a plan soon, they would be decimated, his padawan killed and the planet lost. And even with the few respites the separatist army gave them, food and medicine were rapidly disappearing. 

They couldn’t even give the planet up and escape without reinforcements, which Anakin had asked for weeks before and had yet to arrive —he suspected someone was jamming their signal— and time was running out.  

He forced himself to think as Rex shot droids right and left next to him. He spread his senses to their maximum capability, almost falling into deep trance. He could feel the planet to its core. Every piece of terrain, every small plant and animal, every rock, even the stomping sounds of the marching droids and the vibrations of their own cannons shooting from time to time. 

In that state, he asked the Force for an answer. 

And the Force answered back. 

Anakin came to himself as Rex tackled him onto the ground and three blaster shots went through the air where Anakin’s head had been. “Sir, things are already hard enough.” Rex gritted and Anakin simply stared at him. “Did you figure out a plan?” 

They got up to their feet again, their faces dirty and their bodies tiring even more. “Yes, but I don’t think we’ll manage to get out alive even if I succeed.” He grimaced. 

“Will it let the rest of the troops live to fight another day?” Rex asked. Anakin nodded, grim and bitter as the droids slowly advanced to their last line of defence. He tried not to think about how he would never get to say goodbye to his friends, to see Ahsoka knighted, the war over, Obi-Wan…  “Then we should do it.” His captain said.

Anakin nodded again and pulled his com to his mouth. “Pull back!” He barked. “I want everyone behind the cannon shields in two minutes. That’s an order.” He clarified, and sent an extra warning to Ahsoka to obey through their bond. He watched, relieved, as she sprinted towards the shields, even if she sent back an annoyed feeling back to him. “I’ll need you to cover me for a bit here, Rex.” 

“Consider it done.” 

He took a deep breath and reopened his senses to the Force as the last of their troops reached the safety of the cannons. “Ready?”

Rex gave him a quick nod. “I'd follow you to the bitter end; as I always have.” He said, and Anakin couldn’t be gladder to be fighting alongside him. 

“Well. For whatever it’s worth, it’s been a pleasure fighting alongside you.” He shot back. “Now, cover me!” He said, and Rex was quick to do so, standing before him as Anakin turned off his lightsaber and closed his eyes. 

He focused on the Force, raising his arms and pulling. Once, twice. And then he felt how the ground started to shake and rocks tumbled down to where they were standing. He kept pulling, as the ground before them collapsed and heavy rocks crashed against droids. 

In the back of his mind, he felt Ahsoka’s realisation of his plan, her panic and he was sure he faintly heard a “master!” screamed at him. As the avalanche reached its full force, to the point Rex didn’t even need to keep shooting, he wondered if he could manage to pull them both to safety. 

It was a childish thought, he knew, instead he opened his eyes and pulled the man as close as he could, trying to shield them with the Force, but soon the dust and the rocks took over his sight and he couldn’t see anymore. 

–

Ahsoka saw her master and her captain disappear in the avalanche and felt a knot in her throat. She couldn’t swallow, she couldn’t breathe. 

She tried pulling on the bond but got no answer back. 

As the dust slowly settled, the 501st saw the results of their general’s plan. A heavy wall of rocks had crushed most of the separatist army. Where blaster shots and canon bolts were their previous symphony, now only silence remained. 

“It’s over.” She whispered. Then she pulled herself straight. She was a commander, she had to take over. “Search for survivors!” 

But she didn’t think they would be able to find anything. 

A group of clones went to search for their general and captain as another began tending to their wounded. And then, a lone clone was walking towards her. “Reinforcements have arrived. They are orbiting the planet. General Kenobi is asking for a report.” 

Reinforcements. A moment too late. As usual, Anakin had surpassed expectations. “Take me to the communication command.” She said, and wondered how she would deliver the news to Obi-Wan.  

Thank you for asking!

[forgivenpunishment]

Nick watches Vash's expressions and mannerisms in the way only he can know how; even with his incredible ability to read Vash-isms, he can't parse the emotion the man feels when he touches Ship 5 on the map. It's something like... dread, or hope, or concern, or... he doesn't know. He supposes that a world where everything went according to plan, or mostly anyway, would mean ghosts from his past still being around... but different.

Yeah, that's about how he'd feel about it too.

And then—

"GHK—" Wolfwood turns red at the grip of Vash's arm around his neck. Not only is it embarrassing to be corrected on his attempt at a different language, but getting manhandled like this by Vash—any Vash—is... well...

Anyway.

He shakes Vash's arm off.

"Didn't we talk about this already? I want to help." Despite whatever he wants, Wolfwood has an idea of what Vash is planning to do... more or less. He won't lie to himself—the idea of getting stuck out in this weird world with all the hybrid plants alone gives him the chills. Maybe that alone will get Vash to stick with him.

Wolfwood sighs, taking his time to respond by forcing Vash to wait for him to light up a smoke before responding. "No, it's not my job. Splitting up is a shitty idea, especially with somethin' this dark stewing underneath the pretty pink paradise."

He glances at the out of place Punisher that he stood up beside them.

"I can defend myself just fine, but it seems like things are a little different than a lawless land of outlaws and bandits. If either of us gets arrested, or caged, or worse, how will anyone know?" Nick scrunches his face and purses his lips with his next drag, "Us stickin' together isn't just about workin' together, you know. It's safety. The others could've landed... anywhere. The world is huge and populated—practically unrecognizable."

Humming in thought a moment, he continues, "For all I know, if they got me—which they won't—they'd probably... well... I've been told that I'm very compatible with whatever they put me through for me to be like this. I can only assume this is something similar..."

Oh. Oh no.

"Wait—if the me here is like me, if he exists, they wouldn't just use him as an assassin. Oh, God—that man is doomed, shit." For some reason, Nick feels a pang of responsibility hooking his heart, and it's telling him he's gotta save this one. This one should be the one that ends up normal and happy, not...

He taps his fingers against the table anxiously, thinking.

"Maybe they didn't find him here," he hopes idly as he stands up to pace, "Fuck—we have to... I don't know. If there's a Wolfwood here, we need to find him. We need to find both of them."

The idea of needing to mercy kill himself is... unappealing, to say the least.

Veneration does not beget acceptance. Hybrids are honored for their sacrifice by the spoken word but the circumstances of their creation are a cruelty in of itself. Do the Independents of this world work alongside humanity by their own volition or because they are made to? His brother had believed coexistence to be fundamentally impossible. 

“Maybe.” Not enough information to form an opinion one way or another, and the beginnings of what he does have does not bode well. 

An extensive steamer network connects all the major cities and then some, allowing travelers to avoid the typical risks of desert travel. Vash’s eyes move across the various start and end points, mapping them against the long defunct settlements of his own home. Any one of these towns must be unbelievably populous, thrumming with conversation, workers, children, hawkers, panhandlers. Reminiscing ends with a wince as Vash follows the movement of Wolfwood’s finger over Ship 5. 

“...You could say that. That’s the ship my brother and I were born on.” If some version of himself existed in this world, it’s entirely possible they would meet him there. Knives, too…And then there’s Rem. The thought of even catching a glimpse of her sends an unexpected pang through his chest as he listens to the entire recording with a frown. “If that’s the case…Then it might really be Ship 5 that we want.”

No reason they can’t look into Ship 3 while they’re in the area.

They ought to wait for the others to catch up, but amongst the group Vash doubts anyone is lacking in their ability to track down the humanoid typhoons. 

“Wait, what did you just say?” Vash blinks, looking back at Nick and running the statement back in his head. He slings an arm around Wolfwood’s neck, lassoing him in close with a laugh. “Ciudad Marza, huh? Since that’s the nearest major station, that’ll be our ticket out of town!”

Gazing back down at the maps spread over the surface of the table, Vash somberly places his hand over Ship 5. Staring at the label above his fingers does little for the tightness in his chest. 

Even traveling by sandsteamer, such a journey could still take them the better part of the month. It’s not too late for Wolfwood to turn back, attempt to regroup with the others. He has his own Meryl and Vash to look after, and Vash as of yet hasn’t been able to drive that point home.

“Wolfwood…” He already asked once, but it bears asking for confirmation but hoping for something else entirely. He doesn’t care how easy of a read he presents. Wolfwood has a knack for hearing what remains unsaid. “Are you really sure about this? It’s not like I’ll just up and disappear, y’know.” 

Vash starts rolling up the maps. “Look, if they get angry at you, you can just tell ‘em I gave you the slip.”

Sneaking off has occurred to him more than once since they left the modified Plant room. He still could, then they could all be equally mad at him instead of at Wolfwood. 

“It isn’t your job to follow me around anymore.”

[thehollowprince]

CONTEXT IS EVERYTHING

I got a reblog from one of the people that really dislike Scott McCall on one of my asks today. Like, an actual reblog and not just another anon chasing their tail in circles trying to convince me, themselves and the rest of the world that Scott was truly just Bad™. I was super surprised because that usually doesn't happen until after their leaders Athena and Cole give them the signal, but in the same breath I wasnt surprised because they had me blocked so that I couldn't reply. Par for the course, I guess, but I managed to snag screencaps of the reply and I'm here to just... go through them.

My favorite part of this is that they seemed to have been under the impression that my answer to that anon was a challenge of some kind.

For anyone interested, this was all in response to this ask that I answered yesterday. I went through and debunked all of their points and that's what I'm going to do again with this.

1: are we referring to the first season when they broke up after Night School because Scott "abandoned" them to save their lives from Peter? Because, yes, Scott did send her texts and a picture of them when they were together, and she got upset, and after explaining things, guess what, he did, in fact, leave her alone!

2: I've already talked about Scott's interaction with Isaac in Anchors ad nauseam, which can be read here and here. If anyone doesn't want to read the second one (I admit, I can get a little long-winded), what I said was that I didn't like that scene because of how out-of-character it was for Scott. As for Jackson, with the way he treated people, Scott in particular, I'm honestly surprised that no one beat him before that. Scott has the patience of a saint to deal with that for as long as he did without snapping.

3: what's really weird about this is how these people who really dislike Scott (and just by how that was phrased I think I finally found the anon) always fixate on that time Scott shoved Isaac. Just that one moment, and you know why, because their were no moments after that. Scott had no objections to Allison and Isaac hooking up (they never got around to actually dating).

4: this is one of those moments where I want to shake people and say "please watch the damn show!", because what this dingus left out, like everything else in their reply, was context (more on that in a minute). In that scene where Scott yells at Allison (Raving), its after their plan starts to fall apart. That's one of Scott's legitimate flaws in the show (conveniently overlooked in favor of fictional flaws). When things don't go according to plan, he gets frazzled and upset. It's why he and Stiles work so well together, because Stiles excelled at the spur-of-the-moment stuff. Their plan to capture Jackson (to save his life) and discover who his master was wasnt going according to plan. As a matter of fact, it went completely belly up, and a lot of people were in danger. Forgive me if I give a scared sixteen-year-old some leeway in that situation.

6: this is another instance where you just know that they either haven't watched the show, or they've seen the episode once (probably when it aired) and have never gone back to watch it again, relying solely on their Tumblr community to reaffirm their stance on the situation. What this person failed to include, was that the hunters were already hunting Isaac and Erica and Boyd. They were after Derek's pack since the moment Gerard came to town and declared war on all werewolves, whether they were involved in Kate's death or not (Omega). No thought as t all is given to why Isaac, Erica and Boyd were even in that situation to begin with. Why did Derek involve children in his issues?

What this person is also leaving out is that Scott and Allison didn't get to talk about what happened to her mother at the rave until season three. After she killed herself, she was manipulated by Gerard into actively hunting Derek's pack, and basically told Scott to leave her alone while she contemplated murder.

But once again, we have that double standard rearing its ugly head. Why is Scott supposed to tell everyone everything, but the same doesn't apply to characters like Derek or Stiles? Why didn't Derek tell Scott about his history with the Argents and why he hated them so much? Why didn't Stiles tell Scott about Donovan's or Josh's deaths or Theo's involvement? Why is that the fandom allows themselves to empathize with how these characters are feeling, with allowing them to be emotional in their decisions, but not the lead?

This is where context becomes incredibly important, because without context, we get people making blanket statements about a character in order to paint them in a bad light. Without context, I could make statements like "Stiles is a murderer for killing Donovan" or "Stiles nearly killed a police station full of people" or "Lydia was in league with Peter to bring him back from the dead". Those statements by themselves don't put those characters in a good light, do they? But once you add the context to those situations, it changes the entire perspective of things.

With context, I know that Stiles didn't murder Donovan, but that it was an accident that happened in a life-or-death situation. With context, I know that it wasnt Stiles that planted those explosives, but the Nogitsune possessing him. With context, I know that it was Peter's hijacking of Lydia's mind and untapped power that allowed him to rise from the dead. We're allowed to remember the context of these situations, but why not ever when it concerns Scott and his hardships? Another good example is painting Scott as an idiot because he had bad grades, while completely ignoring the circumstances around his life that led to his grades slipping, namely the werewolf shenanigans he was getting dragged into. The double-standard comes in when a legion of fans come to Stiles' defense for writing an essay on the history of circumcision for an Economics class, because "he has ADD/ADHD" all over one throwaway line about him taking Adderall.

Context is everything, and it's amazing how often it's completely ignored when it comes to Scott.

Two more points.

Sadly, this isn't just something specific to the Teen Wolf fandom. Fandom in general seem to think that romance is the final evolution of any kind of relationship. It says something about them that that's where they're putting the emphasis on Scott's and Allison's relationship, and not the fact that they found their way back to being friends after everything that happened between them in season two.

And then there's this gem.

Wait... what?

I am so confused by this, because I'm not talking about a character I hate, but rather defending one I actually live against a campaign of misinformation. They use the word irony, but I don't think it means what they think it does (this isn't the Alanis Morrisette song).

Final thoughts: I often find myself wondering why I even humor these people anymore because it doesn't matter what I say, or what evidence I produce, they're just going to go out of their way to twist everything into making it sound like I think Coolsville sucks. But I'm like a cockroach, I persist. It's going to take more than they can throw at me to make me stop calling out the racism and double-standards that permeate this fandom.

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Troubles at the Pines' : New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

"Troubles at the Pines"

Chapter Summary : Yirina, along with Park & Adler, is going to face Stitch at Mall of the Pines.....

To read it on AO3, click here !

Words : +4300

-------------------------------

Seeing Hudson face after all these times and seeing him acting like Adler did in my first days back in the safehouse, I can say that everything was starting all over again....with me, trying to make sure that I'm no longer seen as an terrorist, as an Perseus agent. Of course, with that coming back, my anger was with it too, letting myself a little bit overreacting when Adler taunted me about sarcasm and to be honest, I really think that sarcasm was something helping me to not let my rage get in control of me......and that's happening a lot of time with Adler & Hudson.

We needed a bigger plan than just 'broke in and kill Stitch for good' like Adler explained to us but even if he finally agreed to planify our moves inside the mall.....it wasn't still a bigger plan we had : we just added 'separate in teams' to the original plan and Adler been Adler, he refused to lose time and we quickly had to prepare ourselves for the mission as Stitch wanted his plans to occur, according to Adler, in the night of the same day.

Weirdly, Adler wouldn't agree to let Mason, Woods & Sims to participe in the operation and frankly, I wonder why that and even if they were trying to protest along with us, he didn't want to hear it. Instead, me & Park was obliged to go with Adler, Zeyna & Bulldozer as part of their own team and it wasn't the time to argue with that. Once we were ready, we got into a military truck and we were on our way to 'Mall at the Pines' as it was called. Part of my equipment were given to me by either Park or Adler himself.

"So....Grigoriev, right ?" Zeyna called me out while I was checking the Krig 6 I was given as we were in the truck, our seats facing each other with Park at my side and Zeyna having Jones & Adler next to her. I nodded to her, putting the gun on my lap. "Where are you from ?" She asked me.

"I'm from Ukraine." I replied as I was wondering what questions she wanted to give me, given to her curious look.

"Really ? Even if the name is Ukrainian, you're sounding very british." She muttered.....I can thanks Park for that accent I still got.....

"I've been working for the MI6 for years now and....." I started to say before looking at Park " I was very influenced by them." I added, grinning. It was just like when I told Wolf of my 'story' but this time, Adler was there to assist the conversation and when I looked at him, I could see on his face that hell will be on that truck if the truth was on the air, he needed himself to cover that.

"Grigoriev helped us by a lot." Adler exclaimed, lying him too, he was in his element to be honest. "She worked with me as we stopped Greenlight along with Park." He added, having a neutral face on me & Park.

"After that, she joined me to work inside the MI6." Park intervened at my side and I looked at her with an smile. On her face, I could see that it was hurting her again to lie about the long 3 years I wasn't really there.

"You didn't stay to work with us ?" Bulldozer scoffed, his voice muffled as he was now wearing his riot helmet on him. "Are there something you didn't like ?"

"Let's just say that the CIA wasn't so good with me in some ways." I joked, giving to Adler a look that could be described as an warning to him, knowing that at any moment, I can change my mind and finish the job with him.

"Oh, that's why Hudson were like pissed off when he saw you ?" Zeyna asked and I nodded again.

"Hudson isn't the type of person that will put his trust on people that aren't americans." Park said, looking at Adler too. "I can talk about this by a lot." She whispered likely to herself.

"Never like the guy anyways." Bulldozer snorted, everyone must be hating Hudson on something and all for a good reason. "Still forced to work with him however."

"We had to, Hudson authority can't be contested at all." Adler told him, having heard his statement.

"Even if he has to stay the dick I met 3 years ago ?" I questioned him.

"Yes." Everyone except me replied in unison to me.

"Anyway, I didn't asked but is anyone of you ever met Stitch before except for Adler ?" Zeyna wondered, looking at everyone before I slowly raised my hand.

"I did." I answered in a low voice, getting Adler attention on me.

"Wait, really ?" He was sounding very surprised by that even if he know of my status.

"Yeah." I breathed at him, looking sure of me. "I had a run-in with him in Ukraine back in my days in the KGB....a few days before I defected in January 1981." I added, mentioning the memory I had before I woke up in that base. "I broke his left arm."

"You....you broke Stitch left arm ?" Adler was again stunned by that, guess he isn't the only one who had history with Stitch. Everyone else was also like him, Park realizing that it was the memory I had in the car.

"Succeeded to corner him but I didn't have the chances to finish him before he was saved by one of Perseus." I continued, looking a little bit out of myself.

"So, Adler make him lose an eye and you broke his arm....kinda brutal !" Bulldozer admitted, having his look either on me or Adler. "You two have quite a grudge against that guy." We both nodded to him.

"If he's in the US, something big is gonna happen." Adler muttered. "Even if what we are going to do is without a plan, we need to take the risk." He affirmed his opinion on the mission before he looked outside the truck to see that we were near our destination. "Okay, get yourself ready, we arrived." We checked our guns for the last time before the truck stopped completely on the mall's parking.

I was the first one to have my feet back on the ground, soon followed by the others pretty quickly before Adler moved to adress the team that were going to support us from behind as Mason, Woods & Sims has their team taking the other side of the mall for them. Once Adler was finished, he gestured us to follow him at the entrance of the place who was blocked by numerous wooden planks.

"Bulldozer, use your hammer on that !" Adler ordered to him as Bulldozer took the hammer that was on his back.

"On it !" He complied as he moved to get to the entrance and then, he start to use his hammer to smash the planks covering the entrance. He wasn't going easy on his moves as the planks were falling one by one but the loud noises from him removed the element of surprise from us....guess there weren't any of it at all. "Finished." He said after the entrance was clear for us and to be surprised, we weren't greeted by bullets once it was done.

"Let's move inside, the support team will enter when I'll order it." Adler stepped inside the mall as we start to follow him. I rolled my eyes at it because we were literally going into the lion's den but can't back down as we were already there. "Support team, get your team ready on my signal !" He said to his radio and I could hear the chief of the other team agreeing to it from mine.

The first thing we started to do once we got in was to have our guns pointed in all the directions, wondering why nobody was there to attack us like that after we did a lot of noises. The first part of the mall was pretty silent and that wasn't normal if Stitch got his base planted here, he couldn't be silent like that, something in here was very off. In my head, I was thinking about what will Stitch will say when he will saw my face as I have nothing to cover it : the last time I saw him....I broke his left arm.....was it really the last time I saw him before Turkey ?

Park, on her side was trying to keep her cool as we were slowly advancing inside the mall, checking every corner, potentials cover and traps in case Stitch left any for us. Each step I was taking, each time I was thinking that we were going to walk straight into a hidden mine somewhere but nothing like that happened, it was more like walking straight into a damn trap and Adler know it well, we all know it well now. If we die, we all have someone to blame for that and of course, it would be Adler.

"Nothing here." Park whispered to me as we were advancing together, checking quickly a sports store as Zeyna & Bulldozer were covering from their side, a electronics store while Adler was taking the lead.

"We all going to get jumped on and we act like we don't know it." I exclaimed to her silently, keeping our voices down as Adler ordered to us. "If you lied to us, I will kill you myself, Adler." I affirmed to him, serious in my voice.

"I know that, Yirina." He said, focused on watching in front of him with his gun before we start to arrive in what was looking the center of the mall : a sort of fountain.....and in it, there were light blue barrels connected to each other with something marked in red on it until we all discovered what was those things. "Shit, he's started reproducing Nova-6." Adler lowered his gun for a second, looking at those barrels with his gun flashlight until.....

"Hands up !" We heard a man voice coming from behind a cover on top of some escalators with an assault rifle in his hand and then, it was more than just a guy as a lot of black-dressed soldiers come out of their cover in front of us and behind us....we walked right into a trap !....Thanks you, Adler !....We looked all around us, our guns still up and facing those guys.

"Is this all you got ?" Adler shouted to these guys, taunting them and worsening our own case until we heard the noise of a elevator going down just at a few steps from us.

"You had to ask !" Park told him, almost angry in her voice as she was behind me, I was aiming to those guys we first spotted with Zeyna as Park was with Bulldozer, aiming at where we came in. The elevator's door opened to reveal....Stitch himself in the same clothes in that memory with some modifications on them. He was holding a sort of shotgun in his left hand.

"Adler !" He started as Adler looked at him with deadly eyes. "You are very stupid to have fallen into my trap."

"It was the risk, I really wanted to make you lose your other eye." Adler replied, joking around with him as it wasn't the time for that, we are trapped !

"Is this what you think ?" Stitch almost laughed until he got his both hands on his gun, looking at these mens around us. "Kill the others, Adler.....is mine !" He was ready until I made a little eye contact with him just for one second and I could see on his face that he recognized me. "You....Yirina Grigoriev." He said my whole name and now....I was kinda mixed by having my name mentioned by him....I had....to play....'Bell'.

"Who is Yirina ?" I asked him, fainting to not knowing him at all, getting Zeyna incomprehesion in the process by saying that.

"On my signal, you run to hide." Adler started, whispering it to ourselves before we start to hear some gunshots inside the mall, meaning that the support team did came to our rescue a bit late. "Run !" Adler shouted as he throw two smokes grenade he was secretly holding in his hands around us and we immediately complied.

I think that I have never sprinted fast in my entire life as the bullets started to be heard in our area against us. Of course, we were all separated from that, away from Park, finding myself to run with Zeyna at my side to hide somewhere in the mall and we quickly find a cover in a store that was just a few meters from our original position before the fight started. Once we were both into that store, we moved away from the windows looking at the center of the mall to get behind in cover behind the counter of the store.

"Putain !" Zeyna cursed in french, realizing the situation we got ourselves too, checking the drum mag of her MP5. "Those bastards were awaiting for us."

"Of course, they were going to trap us." I exclaimed, trying to have a look above the counter before getting myself down back behind the counter, avoiding the bullets coming towards us. The mall really became a warzone now. "Adler knew the risk of it and now, look at where we are."

"Shit, where are the others ?" She asked before putting her hand on her radio. "Bulldozer, what's your status ? I'm with Grigoriev in a clothes store."

"I'm with Park in the electronics store just next to yours but Stitch's goons are going to overwhelm our position." He responded, firying at the same time with his gun.

"What about Adler ?" I questioned him.

"Don't know, he took another direction from us." He said before his radio got shut down like if someone attacked him and when that happened, we looked each other with Zeyna.

"Merde, we need to go join them before they got into bigger troubles." She exclaimed and for that, I couldn't agree more to it.

"I second that but...." I peaked my head a little to check at the store's state we were : filled with bullets holes and in bad shape. "We might need another exit for that."

"There !" She pointed to a side door that was maybe leading to a reserve. "We can join them by there." She added before she started to fire in the front entrance direction to kill a guy that tried to get to us.

"I'll go first, cover me !" I ordered before I start to run to get to that door.

I fired a few shots from my Krig 6 to help Zeyna before I opened the door and get myself inside the reserve of the store....to be greeted by an Perseus agent in front of me once I was inside. I tried to react quickly but he was more faster, putting his hand on my gun as I was trying to shoot him with it, getting myself into a struggle for my own gun. Unfortunately, he was more stronger than me and he managed to throw my gun away before he grabbed me by the collar and smashed me against the wall behind him.

My back was now hurting me a little from the impact and I could thanks my bulletproof vest to have protect me from the biggest part of the pain. I thought he was going to continue until he was suddenly grabbed by behind by Zeyna, having a big stick getting planted into his left feet, making him fall as Zeyna removed her stick to strike him right into the head, killing the guy and saving me from him.

"Wrong time, wrong place." She taunted to the dead man, getting her stick on her back before she moved to get to my gun. "Must be to you, je pense !" She took the gun and throw it at me gently.

"Merci." I said in french as I grabbed the gun in my hands, changing the empty mag of it before I could her, looking at me curiously.

"Didn't know you could speak french, Grigoriev." She told me, taking her MP5 in hand.

"Got myself some good skills, I can say." I didn't want to brag about myself, considering the situation we're in. "Let's go join Park & Bulldozer." I affirmed, getting ready again.

"They must be behind that door, Jones said that they were just next to us." She took the lead as we moved to get to the other door of the reserve that was certainly leading to the store they were.

When we arrived near the door, we could hear some gunshots in it and we couldn't stay here so we forced open the door, our guns ready to shoot in case. Park was fighting hand-to-hand with two Stitch's guys, getting one of them under her right arm who she broke his neck like that before she pull out a gun from her holstler, to kill the other guy with it. She was an damn expert in it and I saw it happen ! But then, a third guy that was already on the ground tried to shoot her and I was the one to react quickly, killing him in a second and making Park aware of our presence.

"Thank god, you're here." She exclaimed at us, relieved before we could see Bulldozer fighting with another goon before he took his hammer in hand, hitting the guy with the back of it right behind his head....before literally striking the guy in the jaw with the hammer, making some teeth and blood to fly away.

"Everything looks like a nail !" He said to the dead guy before he got quickly back to cover as bullets came into our direction, taking his M16 in the process. We mimicked him too, getting behind the counter with Park.

"You're alright ?" I asked her, worried as I could see a little bit of blood on her face.

"I'm okay, Yirina." She replied, getting her hand through her face to clean it from the blood she had. "Just the blood of these douchebags." She added, taking the gun she had in hands.

"Have you seen Adler ?" Zeyna asked.

"I saw him running right into the arcade but then, no more radio signals from him." She responded before she got out of cover to get next to Bulldozer who were covered just next to the store entrance.

"Our guys are slowly advancing to get here." Bulldozer explained, looking outside the store to see that the support team were near the center of the mall. "Perseus's boys are either shooting at us or them."

"And to say that Adler is alone in the arcade...."  I whispered, finding out that the arcade was just at a few meters from us....having just to face bullets from Perseus soldiers. "I think I should go trying to save Adler's ass before something wrong happened to him." I suggested....was it a bad idea ?.....

"Maybe, we can cover you with our guns as you try to enter that area." Zeyna wasn't sure of it before she looked outside, in the arcade direction. "You could do it. Bulldozer, Park, be ready !" She ordered as she prepare herself to get ready to cover me.

"Be careful, Yiri." Park said silently at me, knowing the risk I'm taking now as she got herself next to Zeyna.

"I will." I replied discreetly too before I took a deep breath and squeezed my eyes, trying to think straight....finally ready.

"Go !" Zeyna got out of cover to fire, starting my run to get to the arcade.

The three opened fire at the same time as I was out of the store I was hiding with them. I started to run as fast as I can to get to the arcade, exchanging some bullets with the few guys that I was in my way until I arrived near the entrance, getting my gun reloaded, not wanting to make any mistakes in case it wasn't going to be Adler to greet me inside. I breathed and then I moved inside.

"You will soon experiment the hell on earth, Adler !" I could hear Stitch talk to Adler himself and when I fully arrived in the room, Adler was holded by two Perseus soldiers, each one by his arm as Stitch was facing him, looking sure of himself.

"Fuck you, Stitch." Adler said before he was knocked out by the guys behind him and I moved to react quickly to save Adler.

"Stitch !" I yelled at him to get his attention off Adler, ready to shot him dead....until I got myself grabbed by someone who was hidden, getting above the counter of the arcade with the same person.

"Let's get out of here, we're done here." I was able to hear Stitch starting to walk away as I was on the ground behind the counter as the person who attacked get on me, trying to control me and then, they got their knife out ready to stab me and I quickly reacted by putting my hand on their arms. I looked the masked person in the eyes and then.....Freya ?.....It was her, behind that mask.

"Yirina ?" She just realized that it was me she was going to kill....More than 1 week after the events of the Tempelhof Airport, I saw her again and inside of me, I couldn't believe myself....After all what happened, she was there with Stitch but again....I don't know but I was still forced to play 'Bell'....something that it's breaking me in the inside but I can't do something against it. She slowly removed her knife from me, allowing me to push here back with my feets before I managed to take my M1911 in hands.

"Stop calling me like that." I ordered her, aiming her but not bringing myself to shoot as she removed the hood she had on her head.

"Please, Yiri, come back with me." She pleaded, offering her hands towards me, still scared about been targeted by me.

"I don't know you for fuck sake." I exclaimed at her, angry and inside of me, starting to get more broken even if I wasn't shooting her like 'Bell' would have done. Then, she moved her hands slowly towards on her pocket "What's this ?" I asked before I could see....a ring....in her right hand.

"This...this was your mother ring, Yirina." She replied, making me look at the ring, keeping my gun in hand. "You proposed to me in September 1980 before you took back the ring in January 1981....I was able to take it back." She added....making me realize that this was the same ring I took from her in that memory....my mother ring....how ?

"How...." I was in a loss of words, thinking as 'Bell'....acting as Yirina. "I....I don't believe you." I started to breath more loudly, thinking that I was going to pass out from all of this and I was keeping my control up. "You're lying." I said in a low voice, nearly cracking.

"Please, we can go home." She slowly tried to move towards me.

"Stay back....don't....don't move, I'm not Yirina." I told her, having my gun still on her, still acting as 'Bell'

"Freya !" Someone entered the arcade as I could hear from behind the counter that I couldn't see because I was leaned against it, sit. "Freya, we need to get the hell out of here." That voice....it was that Sonya.

"Go...." I whispered to Freya, not wanting to harm even if I know more about her and what she has done to me, I couldn't do hurt her....I still feel that sister link inside of me.

"Yirina...." She breathed, still offering her hand.

"Go !" I repeated myself silently to her as she realized that she couldn't bring me back 'home' with her and that she was thinking that I wasn't 'Yirina Grigoriev' but 'Bell'. She slowly put the ring back in her pocket, holding back her own tears as I could see on her face.

"I will bring you home, Yiri. That's a promise !" She told me before she got up, putting back her hood on and then, she left without telling Sonya or anyone else that I was here, maybe going to say that she killed me to them.

When she was out of my sight, I was holding back my tears like her. I was close to crack down and to tell her everything about me when she showed my ring....the ring of my own mother that I can't even remember because I don't have any memories of my childhood. After a few seconds after Freya's departure on the ground, getting back in control, I moved to get up to see the arcade, realizing that Adler wasn't there anymore.....taken away by Stitch. I moved to get next to the outside entrance of the arcade, discovering an helicopter where Stitch and his men were bringing Adler inside of it before taking off.....I couldn't do a thing as they were too many for me to handle at all and it would have been too risky for me.

I was slowly shocked as I was getting back to the entrance I first take to enter the arcade before been greeted by Park herself who has came to see if everything was okay for me. Apparently, the fight inside the mall was finished a

"Oh my god, Yirina, you're okay ?" She first said, getting her hands on my arms and to be frankly, I couldn't nod after what happened, I wasn't okay at all so I shook my head, closing my eyes, trying to not cry and breaking down.....but I couldn't resist anymore and I fall in her arms, crying at my best....

"They took Adler away.....and Freya was there."

[evilwickedme]

@jesswithane I'm making this a reblog because it's too long to be a reply

The image you get from a lot of batfam fanfiction where Jason comes back from the dead is that he comes back mad, that everything he does is motivated by this anger, that the attack on titan tower was this big dramatic moment, etc etc. The UTRH movie I think accidentally contributed to this by showing Jason emerging from the pit already killing, which makes zero sense (why would he have a sword with him as a dead body??).

But the truth is Jason does not come back from the dead particularly angry. He comes back feeling hurt, betrayed, and determined. Even according to Lost Days (which was published after Under the Red Hood but takes place before it), when Jason places a bomb under The Batmobile trying to kill Batman, he doesn't seem angry. Wanting revenge can be hot and unrestrained, or it can be cold and calculated, and for the most part Jason is using his brain here. This is why he doesn't go through with the bomb - he realizes that Bruce wouldn't ever know who killed him, and it would not make for good retribution.

This is even more evident in UTRH itself, where Jason may have emotional outbursts when he comes face to face with Bruce, but even his most violent of actions are almost calm in their execution. He doesn't scream "THIS IS WHAT I DID IN TWO HOURS I'M SO FUCKING CRAZY", he tells the drug lords very simply "I did this in two hours." He doesn't seem to particularly revel in the killing, he just doesn't flinch away from it. There a lot of Batman villains - or generally comic villains - who would stop and smell the blood roses, so to speak. Jason kills because he thinks it's necessary. He kills those lieutenants not even because they're bad people, because he needs to do that to gain control of the Gotham underworld.

Even when he does kill for moral reasons, such as in the scene with Onyx (which I retold with Tim instead in my fic cause I have no idea who Onyx is lmao), he doesn't draw it out. He fights them for a bit, makes sure they're all in one place, and then fires a fucking rocket at them. They die, and Onyx is horrified, but Jason told her exactly what they'd done - peddling drugs to kids, abusing sex workers, etc. He made the conscious choice to kill them and prepared for it by planting that rocket launcher outside the warehouse in the first place.

One of the things I actually like about the movie more than the original comic is that the plan to take over Gotham and the plan to get retribution against the joker are more intimately linked with the decision to antagonize Black Mask, as he's the one who breaks the Joker out of Arkham. In the comic, however, Jason has a hold of the Joker from the beginning, and we actually see Jason beat him with a crowbar. Even though I think this is a worse narrative choice, it reinforces what I've been saying: Jason gets his revenge, he hurts and maims the Joker with the same weapon that the Joker used on him, but he doesn't lose control. He not only does not kill him, but he keeps him alive for several more weeks until the final confrontation with Batman where he asks Bruce to kill the Joker for him.

In short, not only is the Pit Madness trope extremely triggering to victims of abuse and not based in any comics canon, I think it's actively doing a disservice to Jason as a character. It's a misrepresentation of how particular Jason was with the details when he became a villain, and in fact what made him so successful in his debut as a villain is the fact that he had complete control of the situation. He had some anger, yes. But overall I would not call him angry. I would call him vengeful.

Do you ever find yourself slightly resentful of how fanon DC has completely overtaken canon DC? I like fanon most of the time but it is so difficult now to find stories that are based in canon. Batman stories are by far the worst offender.

I'm not 100% sure if you're referring to the fact that a lot of recent stories in the comics are pretty ooc or if you mean fic, but based on the last few days of asks, I'm going to assume you're referring to fandom works specifically. And the answer honestly is yes.

I in general have complicated feelings towards fanon. While certain types of fanon can actually create stories that are more complex - for example most of the Spider-Man fandom has pretty much accepted that Peter is Jewish and has depression and anxiety - or even just make for pretty fun concepts - I just love stalker!Tim okay I don't know what to tell you, or purring!Spider-People!! - the vast majority of fanon is mostly really flat characterization or actively damaging. Going back to Spidey, pretty much every bit of MCU!Spidey fanon is fucking awful. And yeah, a lot of Batfam fanon, especially surrounding Jason - is really fucking awful.

I think it's fine for fanon to exist, but the fact that it so often overwhelms the actual canon stories means that sometimes canon gets actually rewritten in people's minds. Like the people who've been in my inbox recently asking me if pit madness is actually a thing - because if you've had minimal contact with canon, how the fuck are you even supposed to know it isn't? It's so rare to come across a fic that doesn't bring it up, even as a sidenote, and when it doesn't, it's not like it's an active mention that pit madness doesn't exist - it's just there. And it's such a damaging piece of fanon, I know I keep bringing it up but it's because I have to, it's really harmful, especially since it's basically NEVER given a trigger warning. But there's also other annoying fanon - Cass as a perfect angel or Steph being reduced to a waffle fan and Tim to a coffee addict and nothing else and erasing Dick's canonical anger issues entirely, which is maybe my favorite character trait of his (although this one can also be blamed partially on Tom Taylor's terribly ooc writing of the character in the current Nightwing run...).

And the thing is yeah, sometimes we read fic purely for the escaping and the fluff, but I know a lot of us are looking for angst and hurt/comfort and fics that take themes (whether from canon or not) seriously, and it's really frustrating how difficult they are to find. I much prefer a fic that takes Dick's trauma seriously than one that relegates him to supportive older brother only. I much prefer a fic that wrestles with Bruce's inability to love Jason the way Jason wants him to and the physical abuse he's inflicted on his children than one where he's perfect and never done anything wrong. Yeah, I don't mind reading stuff for fun where there's never been anything wrong ever in the batfam. But I'm also low-key upset that my second most kudos'd fic ever is the stupid ooc batfam 5+1 I wrote in an hour. I'd much rather people read hang on which verges on character study and has, you know, themes and stuff. Also parallels, which if you've noticed my tags, are like, my favorite thing.

So yeah, I do dislike the fact that fanon has overwhelming taken over so many fandoms, and especially since batman has become my main fandom over the past few months due to brainrot, I'd love if people took these characters seriously, damnit. But this is what happens when a fandom is so majorly comprised of people who outright admit to have never read a comic in their life.

[bbrandy2002]

The Fall of Cordonia

Chapter Seven (Final)

A/N: Sorry it has taken so long to get this one chapter finished. I have had several things in my personal life that have been quite stressful, I can't even begin to explain what I've been dealing with and I won't bore you with details. I do want to thank @kingliam2019 for asking about this fic several times, it gave me the little boost I needed and for pre-reading chapters for me. Also @burnsoslow for pre-reading snippets and giving me advice. And @sirbeepsalot who has advised me throughout and is just truly a wonderful person.

C/N: I was told I shouldn't end it this way and didnt plan to, however I had a change of heart. I hope its not too disappointing.

Warnings: DARK!! Gun violence, murder, mental illness, major character deaths, suicide, its brutal....but...its not (you will see what I mean).

Word count: 2909

---------

"Hello Son, I've been expecting you."

Liam and Drake stopped dead in their tracks, slack-jawed as the woman who stood before them became clearer. The once image of virtuous beauty and kindness, now an aged souless boor. Her blonde hair now silver, and her flawless ivory skin had heavily creased and worn.

Her voice cut Liam like a knife as it was a sound he had not heard in twenty five years. There was no love or nurturing in her flat blue eyes, just a haggard woman caught up in her own destructive nature.

Liam fought the temptation and overwhelming urge to run for Eleanor. He needed to feel her long awaited gentle arms wrapped around him again -- to soothe his hurts and wipe away his tears. Like any child would covet from his mother, he wanted her to want to do those things. It soon became clear she was neither interested in entertaining his boyish fantasy nor rekindling their bond.

Cradled in her arms was Liam's infant son-- his own flesh-- and a child he was prepared to give life and limb for if need be.

He stepped forward to approach them. As both of his arms reached out in desperation for Nikolas, Eleanor pointed her gun at him.

Liam fell to his knees in surrender, weakened by the sight of a weapon aimed at his only child. He begged earnestly for her not to hurt his son.

Drake cocked his gun and was ready to enact his own vengance if she hurt the baby.

"You always were soft, my boy," she said wryly as she lowered the gun to her side and shifted a crying Nikolas in her arms.

Liam gave her a pleading look with an arm outstretched towards her. "Mother, I'll do anything if you give him to me. I"m begging you...just give him to me please."

Eleanor rolled her eyes and huffed with annoyance. "Stop your groveling Liam, you sound like your father -- may he roast in flames for eternity." She signed the cross from her forehead to her chest and both shoulders with a dry smile, still clutching onto her pistol.

He eased to his feet cautiously, his mind wracked with confusing thoughts of who he was now dealing with. "Okay." He nodded. "What do you want?"

Eleanor crossed the small sitting room and laid Nikolas in a bassinet. She then placed a pacifier in his mouth to sooth him. She stood, hovering over the baby before flashing an icy glare back to Liam. "I want what I set out for thirty three years ago -- Cordonia."

Like a tidal wave mounting in intensity and wrath, Liam's emotions began to build in ferosity. "You fucking had Cordonia, Eleanor!" He snapped angrily, pounding his fisted hand on the table before tossing a lamp off of it.

"Did you forget that? You were the queen, goddamn you! You had everything a person could ever dream of!" He trailed off and shook his head into the palms of his hands. With his breaths labored, he looked back up with tears in his eyes, "Was any of it real?"

Eleanor ran her tongue over the front of her teeth and stepped away from the bassinet to approach Liam. She stopped just short him and looked up at her towering son, her hands clasped together at her stomach. "I was never supposed to fall in love with your father, you were never supposed to be anything more than a spare to tie me to that kingdom. I had a part to play ... and I do believe, my boy..." She patted Liam's cheek with a cold smirk. "I played it magnificently."

Liam looked down at the petite figure standing before him, a shell of the woman he once knew -- or thought he did at least.

She had the pistol still glistening in her ragged, cold fingers, aimed straight at his heart. Eleanor could pull the trigger right then and nothing would make him feel any worse than the words she just spoke.

Liam swallowed the bile that burned his throat, his eyes dancing upwards, shocked by her admission. His whole entire childhood was a lie and that was a bitter pill to swallow. "I see," he muttered softly with a nod.

"Oh Liam, don't look so glum, it was just politics. I planted all the right people in your brothers life to ensure he would turn into the low life piece of shit he became. I needed to make sure MY heir would sit on the throne. All you had to do was accept the alliance offered to you. You, your sister and I could have conquered the world."

"You are one sick, twisted bitch," Drake spoke coldly through the tension.

She smiled back at him amused. "Why, thank you, Drake...I could say the same of your precious little momma."

"Leave my mother out of this," he growled defensively, playing her words off.

A look of pure delight beckoned Eleanor whose eyes began to glisten as she cast her focus on Drake, "Oh, I could never leave Bianca out of this, she was quite helpful to me at one point. Its amazing the lengths one would go to when blackmailed.", she laughs with a cackle, "Your father never saw it coming from her". She feigns shock before acting like she was shot in the chest.

"Drake, she's a liar, don't listen to her". Liam tried to reason with him before Eleanor got completely under his skin. He didn't know if what she was saying was true, but, he knew he had to plant a seed of doubt before she could plant the seed of revenge.

Drake could only stare at her with teeth clenched and eyes squinted, "What does she mean Liam...what the fuck is she talking about?"

"Bianca was a whore.....", Eleanor continued, with a slight grin.

"Shut up Eleanor", Liam interrupted her.

"......she fucked everyone at court..."

"Shut up!!", Liam raised his voice over hers.

"....I caught her on her knees with Constantine..."

"I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP!!", Liam continued.

"She killed your daddy for me Drake, she thought she could be one of us....such a dumbass, that common trash bitch. She was an easy quick lay according to the men at court. Your daddy stuck around for you and your sister, unlike Bianca, who left after her worn out pussy couldn't pay the bills any longer. That was your momma....that is your momma", she emphasized.

The gun shook in Drake's hand as his finger coiled the trigger backwards. His fathers death and his mothers absence growing up was always a sore spot for him. He could feel his blood boil and an intense heat burn though his body.

Liam shook his head at Drake with an empathetic look, attempting to halt any impulsive reactions. One wrong move from either one of them could be deadly and he couldn't take a chance on Nikolas's life.

"Go ahead Drake", Eleanor continued her taunts, "pull the trigger...like mother, like son...avenge your fathers death and your sisters too...I hear she died nice and slow, exactly as Bianca sucked dick".

"Drake, NO!"

The blast of a gun was inevitable.

--------------------------------

Riley was sitting up on her bed with a blank stare, her back resting against a pillow propped up on the headboard. Bertrand was seated in a bergere across the room, holding a sleeping Bartie.

Liam had texted him earlier about checking on Riley, citing her psychiatrist was a part of Amalas' cronies. When Bertrand arrived to her quarters, it was eerily quiet, passing only a nurse exiting with a full tray of food, Riley hadn't eaten.

As her eyes remained fixed forward, not having moved in the hour he had been there, he felt her gaze shift onto him. Bertrand looked up from Bartie and watched his Queen shed one lonely tear. The look of nothingness, sent a chill down his spine; what was she thinking, did she even have thoughts? What could cause such distress that it would break her daze enough to spare a tear.

Bertrand sat up with the resting Bartie cradled in his arms and laid him in the chair, gently swiping loose hairs to the side of his head. He walked slowly towards Riley, pausing briefly, dumbfounded that her eyes continued to follow him. "Riley?", his voice low and tepid.

He inched closer until he was standing at her bedside, easing himself down to sit next to her on the bed.

Her lush, brown hair now dull and lifeless, clung to her face and pillow; golden skin now ashen and pale. Bertrand thought of her as a sister and it pained him greatly to see such a beacon of personality and life, lay waste. He gazed at his reflection in her eyes intently, searching for a pathway into her mind. "Riley, its Bertrand, talk to me", he whispered, inching closer.

Bartie began to moan and whimper in his sleep and caught everyone's attention. Bertrand's reflection immediately disappeared from Riley's, now covered by a sinister glare. She gritted her teeth and gripped tightly to the sheets covering her frail frame.

Bertrand turned away from her to look at his son who had resumed his peaceful slumber.

"BRADSHAW!!!", Riley screamed so loudly it would curdle rushing blood, swinging a large, golden, candle holder brutally until it met resistance from the scalp of Bertrand. He slid limply from the bed, crashing to the cold, marbled floor below.

Riley watched the blood drip from the candle holder onto her perfectly white sheets, trembling at the realization of what she had just done. Her eyes rolled back as she tossed the weapon across the room, grabbing both sides of her head, rocking back and forth in a state of delirium. Chaos and noise ripping into her weakened mind, driving her further into insanity.

Her anxiety level peak, sweat pouring from her forehead, she now covered her ears to block the sounds that only she could hear.

"Liam is dead, Riley....he.is.dead", Bradshaw spoke with a sardonic laugh.

"No....no....Liam....don't leave me", she spoke through labored breaths and sobs, her dainty nails clawing at her face, leaving deep, jagged marks. She gasped deeply in anguish and pain, and muttered, "Liam....not my Liam".

__________________________

Drake flung backwards, his feet tangled in knots of imbalance, tripping over themselves from the momentum of the blast. He had a soul crushing wound, the one meant for Liam, straight to his heart. He rested after a hardened thud against the wall and slammed face down to the floor.

"Drake!"

Liam lunged forward, grabbing the still, hot barrell of Eleanor's pistol, her finger still tightly woven around its trigger.

Nikolas's startled cries echoed out with the blast, as Liam slung his mothers arm to and fro. For all her fragility, she clung to her gun as if her life depended on it....and it did.

He bent the gun so that it was pointing back at her and wrapped his finger over hers, the one that gripped the trigger so profoundly, and pulled it himself.

Eleanor fell to her knees, clutching her lower stomach, a look of anger and shock, mixed with defeat staring upward at the son she betrayed in every way, "You son of a bitch".

Liam scoffed at the irony of her words, "You're right, I am... a son of a bitch".

She slunk to the ground, lifeless with a pained scowl. A pool of crimson collecting around her like a dam bursting wide open.

He hurried himself to the son he had not seen in weeks, who was still letting out frantic cries as large tears burst from his reddened eyes. Liam wiping his own tears at the sight of his infant child, safe and unharmed. "Its okay Little Love...daddy's here now". As reached in to pick up Nikolas, he felt a seering sting in his back, causing him to let go of his baby before he could even lift him into his comforting arms.

Liam's hands instictively flung to the pain he was experiencing, feeling the warm shred in his shirt and the liquid that seeped through his fingers. It hurt to breath, to even move, but, he turned to see his mother on the floor, pointing the smoking gun up at him.

He inhaled what little air he could, closed his eyes, and spoke silently one last time to himself, "I love you Riley and Nikolas, I always will".

The next sound was the kill shot.

_____________________________

Riley jolted from the bed, tossing the sheet aside, her physical pain mired by the emotional turmoil she was experiencing.

She felt Liam slip away, a deep loneliness sweeping across her heart. She plundered further into her despondant state, knowing she could never live without him, his love, his touch, his arms wrapped around her.

Lost and battered, she found herself alone in the room they shared all their best memories, with a man she thought of as her brother, murdered, accidently, by her own actions.

She slipped to the floor on all fours, weeping softly to herself as she began the long, painstaking trek to the balcony. She crawled over Bertrand, squeezing her eyes tightly closed so that she wouldn't have to see the evil sin she had commited.

She lifted herself up at the balcony railing to a standing position, her knees wobbly from the distant crawl. With the moonlight glowing brighter than she had ever witnessed, Riley admired the stars twinkling and the sounds of crickets singing harmoniously. Her thoughts took her back to her first night in Cordonia, a race in the maze leading to a kiss with a prince. A night very similar to this one.

She peeked over the railing of their fourth floor balcony. The sweet, fragrant aroma of the rose bush below, giving her a sense of calm and ease.

Riley wrapped her arms around herself, rubbing her ams for warmth from the cold night air before closing her eyes. She spoke softly to herself, "I'm coming to you Liam and Nikolas", feeling happiness for the first time since The Fall of Cordonia.

Her tiny body leaned over the railing and she let herself go. Peace and relief would soon overcome her as she flew through the air. The impact was quick and welcomed.

__________________________________

A bright light flickered as chilly hands poked and prodded at her face, fingers forcing an eye open. She squinted and winced as the light was too much on her unadjusted pupils.

"Welcome back, Your Majesty, I'm Dr. Layton. Do you know what happened to you?".

Riley's eyes flickered as she continued to adjust to the lights of the room and the image of the voice who had spoken with her came into focus.

"Queen Riley, can you hear me....do you know why you're in the hospital?"

Riley swallowed hard, realizing how dry her lips were. She tried to moistened them, yet, her tongue was bare, as well. A hand tilted her head forward and a straw was offered to her. Confused, she drew in the cool water that soothed her palate before resting her head back against a pillow. "I...I...died".

"Not exactly", the doctor spoke again while checking her vitals on the monitor, "..you were brought in after the earthquake, a piece of the ceiling fell at the restaurant you were eating in and you took a nasty hit to the head.....you've been out for a few hours".

Riley reached up, tugging the IV cord in her hand, to feel a bandage clinging to the top portion of her forehead.

An older nurse checking on Riley's bandage, asked if she wanted visitors, to which she nodded affirmatively. Not completely sure of what had happened or what was going on, she watched with anticipation as the nurse finished up and walked to the door of her room.

Riley burst into tears moments later when she saw Liam, holding a bright eyed, Nikolas, rushing into her room and racing to her side. They shared a long awaited kiss and exchanges of love, before Liam placed Nikolas in her needing arms. A flurry of emotions passing through her, knowing they both were safe and with her.

Over the next several hours, she learned that several people had been injured in Valtoria from the earthquake, but, no deaths were recorded. Her friends visited or called her one by one and she wept with joy with each person...Mara, Maxwell, Savannah, Bertrand, Drake, Leo, Olivia, Madeleine, Regina and Bastien.

During the quiet still of the night as she laid restless in her hospital room, with Liam and Nikolas laying at her side, she hesitantly shared her dream.

Liam kissed her temple reassuringly, "My love, it was only a dream...I'm here, we are all three here together, our friends and our country are safe....it was just a very bad dream".

"I know", she uttered, "it just felt so damn real...like it was a warning or something".

He wrapped his free arm around her back as she shifted to her side into his embrace, trailing her thumb gently across Nikolas's cheek. "I promise you we are more than prepared for anything that comes our way, we always come out on top, love".

"I hope so....I love you, Liam".

"I love you too darling".

-----------------------------------

"Amalas!", Bradshaw stands from his desk to greet her, "what brings you all the way to Auvernal this late".

She grins slyly with a gleen in her eyes, as he kisses both of her cheeks, "I have an offer I don't think you can refuse.....shall we discuss, Cordonia".

Bradshaw's lips curl with intrique and desire as he offers her a seat, "It's like you read my mind".

[econobitch]

BIENVENIDOS. When they still lived back home in Derik, northern Syria, Silva Hassan Namo and her family would gather each evening around the television to watch the latest episodes of their favourite Mexican telenovelas. Even after civil war forced them to flee to Iraq, the family would follow the soap operas whenever they could, to escape the grim monotony of life in a refugee camp. So when Hassan was granted a scholarship to study in Mexico, her family was uneasy about her moving to a country they’d only ever known as the setting for melodramatic tales of revenge, family feuds and mafia bosses. “My dad’s dream was always for his children to study and become something. But he was scared about me coming to Mexico because he thought it was a country of criminals and marijuana – that’s what we would see in the TV series and the news,” she said. Hassan is one of 10 young Syrians in Mexico thanks to Project Habesha – a small not-for-profit organisation arranging university scholarships for youngsters whose education has been disrupted by the civil war. Almost half a million Syrians have been killed, with another 11 million forcibly displaced. Only a handful of refugees – 39 since 2014, according to immigration figures – have reached Mexico independently, but that is likely to change thanks to Project Habesha. Hassan, the second female student to be picked so far, arrived in March with her husband, Jack Mohammed, 24. Neither of them spoke a word of Spanish, but she describes the experience as a rebirth. “Imagine you’re dead and someone gives you a miracle cure. That’s what coming to Mexico feels like, like I’ve been born again,” said Hassan. ‘This is what Syria was like before the war’ Her new home, Aguascalientes, is a small industrial city in north-central Mexico of a million people, best known for its Nissan plant and arid desert heat. The couple live in a newly refurbished apartment in a small gated complex, which has become the group’s social hub. Hassan puts on her hijab before opening the door to Zain and Hazem, two of the male students who arrived last summer and live across town. She started wearing the headscarf after getting married, and for her it’s an integral part of being a Muslim woman. “I’m the only woman wearing hijab among millions of Mexicans and people do look at me, but it’s important to my religion,” she said. Tonight the students are sharing makdous – aubergines stuffed with walnuts, garlic and chilli, pickled in olive oil – while bickering good naturedly about whether Aleppo or Damascus has the best cuisine. They bemoan the lack of halal and popularity of pork in Mexican street food. Food is a recurrent topic of conversation; politics is not. Kurdish Syrians Silva Hassan Namo, 22 and her husband Jack Mohammed, 24, at their new home in Aguascalientes Silva Hassan Namo, 22, and her husband, Jack Mohammed, 24, at their new home in Aguascalientes. Photograph: Nina Lakhani The 10 students come from diverse economic, social and religious backgrounds. There are Kurds, Alawites, Sunnis and a Christian; some pray five times a day, some not at all. The chatter switches easily between Arabic, Kurdish and English – but not yet Spanish. “This is what Syria was like before the war, we mixed together,” said Jack, who met and married Hassan in a refugee camp. Aguascalientes has largely been spared the drug-fueled violence that has wracked much of Mexico in recent years, and the students expressed disbelief at the conclusions of a recent – and largely discredited – report by the International Institute for Strategic Studies (IISS) that concluded Mexico was the second deadliest country in the world after Syria. “I walk to the shop at 3am alone and everything is fine, no one is going to kill me because of my religion or my nationality. There are mafia in every country. You cannot compare Mexico to Syria or Iraq, the dangers are very different,” said Mohammed. ‘After being a refugee, to be a student feels good’ Project Habesha is the brainchild of Adrian Meléndez, a lawyer from the city, who first met Mohammed in 2013 while working in Iraq for an international NGO. It took two years to persuade the Mexican government to sanction 30 student visas. That was the easy part. Organising travel documents, persuading universities to offer discounted places, finding language courses and accommodation, and raising funds has been a huge challenge. A long way from home: Syrians find unlikely refuge in Brazil But the cogs are turning more smoothly now. The first three arrivals are at university in Mexico City, and seven more are studying Spanish in Aguascalientes. Several others are preparing to make their way to Mexico or Costa Rica, where a sister project is about to open. Ahmed Aldabak, 23, who arrived last month straight from western Aleppo, is the quietest of the group. His conservative Sunni family briefly left the city in 2012, when he was shot by a sniper, but decided to return to their home despite the fighting. “We love Syria. My family doesn’t want to leave and my grandparents are too old. But coming here was a one-time chance I had to take,” he said. Aldabak admits that he was a little nervous about Mexico’s violent reputation. “I was worried about my safety, my family was worried too. But Aleppo is very dangerous, Aguascalientes is fine,” he laughs. To underline the point, he reveals the scar on his chest beneath which the sniper’s bullet remains lodged. Aldabak plans to complete a master’s degree in telecommunications engineering, and then return home to help rebuild his devastated city. The others are not so sure about going back: there is still too much uncertainty to imagine that peace will come to Syria. But Meléndez was confident that wherever they ended up, they would make a contribution. “We are giving them the best of the best to help create 30 super Syrians, who are all successful in their chosen fields and will make a great impact globally.” Mohammed said: “There will be many challenges in Mexico, but we will do it. After four years of being a refugees, to be a student feels very good. It feels like normal again.”