#i've just leaned *hard* into the 'dumb american'

[the-lisechen]

.

[chen-chen-chen-again-chen]

Hi, hello, hola, and happy Stab Caesar Day! Tumblr ate my original draft because, um, I guess its hunger is horrible and insatiable? But here I am for take two. Thank you to @artsyunderstudy, @larkral, and @forabeatofadrum, who tagged me today and who continue to craft delightful things.

Updates on My Good Egg (Good morning, good night, good morning): My plan of posting Chapter 4 today ain't gonna happen. I updated the author's notes, but the next posting date is TBD. I need to focus on my health right now, and then I'll be travelling for a bit (March 24-April 7). But hey, if you've been meaning to read this one, now's a great time to catch up? 🤣

In the meanwhile, I'll share a snippet featuring several of my OCs, Baz's queer, chaotic uni friends. Behind the cut for mild spice. 🌶️

Bunce goes off with Simon so that she can pump the American bartender for information, and as soon as they’re out of earshot, Emma leans forward, her eyes glittering. “Well?”

“Well what.”

“I told Liu and Ramesh you got kidnapped,” Emma says, waving her hand dismissively, “and of course we’re all very worried and hope you’re doing okay and acclimating to regular life again, but have. You. Ridden. That.” 

Baz regrets downing a few rats before they left for the pub, because it means he has enough blood in him to blush. “We’ve been figuring out this kidnapping situation,” he says coolly. “It hasn’t left much time for carnal pursuits.” 

“Baz,” Liu says, aghast. “Why haven’t you fucked that nice himbo? He’s clearly gagging for it - he couldn’t stop staring at your arse in those jeans.” 

“Is he a himbo?” Ramesh says. He pulls out a pen and starts to doodle a triple Venn diagram on a napkin. “He seemed like more of a twunk to me. And he’s got a great bear belly.” 

“Ladies,” Emma says, her hands fluttering in mock-distress, “please don’t objectify that sweet boy before Baz gets to objectify him. Baz will eat his fill of the man-meat and then give us a report.” 

(Please put in the comments/tags if you think Simon Snow is a twunk, a himbo, or something else delightful. 🤣)

Hello tags and tagbacks: @whogaveyoupermission, @cutestkilla, @facewithoutheart, @captain-aralias, @fatalfangirl, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @whogaveyoupermission (THE EDGING CONTINUES), @raenestee, @ileadacharmedlife, @shrekgogurt, @hushed-chorus, @shemakesmeforget, @theimpossibledemon, @imagineacoolusername

More about the hiatus for My Good Egg:

(Warning for some hard stuff, Big Feelings, trauma recovery. Feel free to skip and just bask in Ides of March posts instead!)

Okay, so introspective life/writing blather here... I keep meaning to write a post, at some point, about some of the best practices that I follow when I am writing about material that is heavy, like in Baker boxer teacher grief or the Rosethorn girl universe.

A lot of stuff that works for me is probably self-evident: go slow, be gentle, ground yourself, talk to safe people, have a release valve, be able to walk away, offer yourself a lot of self-care and self-compassion, take care of the soft animal of your body. And don't feel like you have to put everything in - some of what you can write can just be for you, and it can be enough to have written it, and not include it in the finished product.

I honestly didn't expect Good morning, good night, good morning to get me where I live. It is, as I've always maintained, a dumb horny rom com (that somehow developed a plot and backstory and plot TWISTS and OCs but ANYWAY). But there was a line in Chapter 3 that kept rattling around in me:

“You were a kid,” Simon says, his voice low and angry. “You were just a kid.” 

This is not the first time I've been triggered by own fic (and probably won't be the last, LOL!), but this one did me a doozy. I've had to take a few steps back, and just focus on recovering from trauma that's been reactivated in my body. It is wild what the body remembers, and how it holds onto pain.

(There is, at the same time, other stuff happening with my family with grief and estrangement and just a whole mischegoss of hard feelings, so that adds another element into the mix.)

To circle back round to My Good Egg: I'm putting it to the side for now while I tend to my health and just recovering from the past few weeks. It's funny - I don't think it's a particularly angsty story or one that does a super deep dive into trauma, but I need to take some pieces off my plate right now, and this fic is one of them.

I will always keep writing - the WIP game has been a delightful brain refresher, and I have a very fun Six Sentence Sunday post that I'm already excited to share. But for now, My Good Egg is gonna have a li'l nap. When I come back to it, I think I'll switch over to writing the second draft in its entirety, and then posting the chapters weekly, whenever that happens. I'm not putting a timeline on it right now.

Anyway, thanks for coming to my TED talk making your way through this personal essay, if you've gotten this far. I am continually blown away and delighted by everyone who engages with the fic, and I am so excited to serve you up some treats in the future.

To end on a lighter note, here is an exchange with my spouse, the inestimable EarlobeGreyTea who continues to offer thoughtful and nuanced feedback on this fic, Exhibit A:

EarlobeGreyTea: Did they fuck in this chapter?

Me: No Me: And they didn't fuck in the previous chapter Me: It's the EROTIC Grope Fest. It doesn't have to have explicit sex (yet) EarlobeGreyTea: Yeah, I guess it isn't the Sloppy Fuck Fest

Love you all. ❤️❤️❤️

[bas-rouge]

Easy mode: Beauce <3

Hard mode: Akita, golden, shih tzu, corgi, shar pei, GSD and husky (based on patients at work today)

Thank you for the ask! 💖

Beauce - OOHHH the perfect dog. They're such fun, physical dogs. They're so fun to hang out with, so biddable and willing to work with you, and always in such good moods. They always put their everything into what they love and it really, really shows. They've got a much better off-switch than a lot of people anticipate, and they're so loving and dedicated. They get along so well with 99% of people when approached right and with practically every dog. They're all so unique, with such individual personalities you can see even in their faces. And, of course, little eyebrows and double dews. 😍🥰

Akitas - I like American Akitas. They're not for me, but I can appreciate them. They're such beautiful dogs, and a lot of them are really pleasant and fun to hang out with. They're aloof, but I've yet to meet one that's been outright aggressive or anything (but I give them a pretty wide breadth at shows when I've got a dog with me). Such gorgeous dogs. I don't like Akita Inus - I don't like the way they look and the ones I've met have been sort of skittish and weird. So barky.

Golden Retrievers - My most lukewarm take is that I really really don't like Goldens. I don't really have like? A problem with them? They're awesome, they do what they're meant to and they do it well (such great family dogs. So fun, so biddable, so smooth brain), but they're so. So dumb. So. So blindly loving. Every one I've met would trade their owner for like, a passing glance. They're gorgeous though, I love their little faces, and I'll appreciate them from a distance. Also - the health.

Shih Tzu - Oh man, I don't have many breeds I don't like but you managed to list two of them, lol. I really don't like Shih Tzus. I can't do the snorting, I can't do the wheezing, I can't do the crusty-stinky of a lot of the ones I see outside of shows. And the grooming!!! I will say that I think the ones in the show ring are really, really cute, and they're incredibly sweet, so. Again. They're really good at what they're meant to do, and I appreciate them for that. Just not for me, and most of my experiences with them have been. Really, really negative, LOL.

Corgis - I prefer Cardigans to Pembrokes, but I broadly like them both! They're a little barky and demanding for me, but that attitude and sass makes them so fun. They really seem to put their whole heart into everything they do, and they're such smart, mischievous dogs, and they're so funny. They have such good senses of humour. Cardigans are a little more serious, which I appreciate, and a lean a little more into the herdy/worky genes. Pembroke nubs are adorable, Cardigan fox tails are adorable, the satellite ears are adorable, etc., etc. They're a little rude to other dogs but it's fine, they can be rude as a treat.

Shar Pei - I have no strong feelings about Shar Peis. I've met several and my thoughts are: they look like cinnamon rolls, I love their faces, they are so shaped, they do not give a shit about anyone except for sometimes their owners if they have food, and they have really poor health. I think they're really cute though.

German Shepherd Dogs - My feelings on GSDs are pretty conflicting. I find GSDs broadly to be pretty annoying, they're super whiny and super prone to being neurotic and demand barking 24/7, but they're also really smart, biddable, and versatile. They're a ton of fun to hang out with and work with, and there are few sights more beautiful than a GSD working a flock. Gorgeous, gorgeous dogs. They move so horribly in the ring though, absolutely does not do them justice! Get that dog, sloped back and all, out in the pasture and you can Really see that beautiful, fluid, efficient movement. They're so affectionate and so sweet with the people they trust and they're such fun, wiggly puppies. Then there's the health and the 293848 different lines and the weird German show line GSDs that are enormous and hairy and jowly and the "working" lines that look and act like oversized Mals and can't herd to save their lives and so on.

Sibes - I really thought I would hate Sibes going into attending dog shows but I really like them, lol. They're kind of annoying (so loud jfc), but they're so sweet and SO SOFT. They're really just big cuddlebugs and I can appreciate that. I will never have a lifestyle that could accommodate a Sibe, nor would I ever want to have one, but I love love love the ones I meet at shows. So sweet. So, so sweet. They're also quite pretty, I think show line ones are just gorgeous. The blue eyed ones scare me though LOL

[hisui555]

Hazbin Hotel thoughts : Foils 5

Masterpost here

Been a little while, I got myself into some RP for the first time ever. Managed to burn Lucifer's tower down on the first day while being a litteral little gremlin from the dumpsters. That sums it up pretty well.

Oh, and it's the first time I've RP-ed ever.

Anyway, for your inane Foils rambling of the day, my dumb brain cooked up a weird one : Adam (and Exorcists) VS Hell. Obvious, I know, but let's get more into depth about it, shall we ?

So to call Adam an obnoxious psychotic fratbro with all the emotional development of a bratty toddler would be kind of an understatement. Which in itself is an understatement too, to Inception levels. Adam is the First Man, one of the two oldest existing humans alive, turned angel to everyone's bafflement as the very first human soul in Heaven, and given the mystery that looms in the background of the show, it's yet to be seen just how in the bloody world he managed that. From the beginning, he's someone trying to impose his will on someone else, in his case Lilith, who made the utterly sacrilegious decision to stand up for herself and be an independent, emancipated person with boundaries to respect. I know, right ? Crazy.

And given how he reacts to Lucifer's taunting (if this short king really did score the two, it'll be hilarious), Golden KFC-man is tryharding to compensate. But he's also endearing in his brattiness, in his own way, leaning into it so heavily he'd topple Pisa, that he crosses back into funny, despite the genocidal tendencies (which for their part are played for all the horror necessary). And this... is kinda reminiscent of Hell in the show : it's a sordid, horrible place, but a good bucket of dark laughs are derived from it because of how horrible it is. Adam even admits to Charlie that he "likes the vibe", but prides himself on being in Heaven when he clearly didn't deserved any of it.

His own physical appearance, past the gold-blue-white color palette, has horns and shark teeth for the helmet, spikes for the rocker imagery - that, in passing, is often associated with demons and Hell too - and his color scheme dives down to dark blue in the last episode, when ready for battle. While he does look like the most average human ever underneath, it's quite interesting to see that Adam with a color swap and changing nothing else would fit right at home in Hell. Same thing for the Exorcists when in uniform : monochrome, outright more creepy looking than most demons, they actually look like classic demons (minus the tails) unlike the creative diversity of physionomies in Hell, that Heaven mirrors with its own twist on it.

It's kinda like watching a clichéd stereotype costume versus the real thing : Heaven is so out of touch with what's going on below that the Exorcists end up being a mockery of what they mass-hunt, for extra petty points (kinda reminds of what Native Americans went through. Yep. Not a happy thought). And they are just as bloodthirsty, if not more, than the demons themselves (giving you a hard sideglance, Lute), to the point of fanaticism - something that could actually be seen in HELL. Let's repeat, this is their whole activity that shows up once per year, and let's speculate that they do some training, but outside of that ? Plus, they're so confident in themselves that their fighting tactic looks more like "stick weapon into demon and move onto the next" than anything advanced, and didn't see it coming that their own weapons can perma-disconnect them from god's Wi-fi. This is suicidal overconfidence right there - again, something better seen in Hell.

Which makes it very interesting if you put Adam VS Charlie from a virtues and sins point of view : Charlie the Hellborn demon, daughter of Lucifer (who is the embodiment of a Sin himself, namely Pride), checks all virtues while Adam checks all capital sins :

He's wrathful and a revenge-seeker, hating being dismissed or put into question (seething with rage when Charlie and Emily call him indirectly out on his behavior, along Lute), while she's kind and patient, only calling onto anger in rightful situations.

He's often seen stuffing his face with food (ribs) and drinks on various photos and in person, and has a noticeable gut - something Lucifer remarks on that he "kinda let himself go". Charlie is all down for a good drink after a hard day of work, and while Husk mentions that she can get drunk to the point of spouting insecurities, it doesn't happen often and she knows that overindulging is bad. She also makes efforts to get rid of Angel's stash of drugs.

Talking about Adam's libido would be like trying to barge into open doors : he jumps on whoever he wants and even throws a tantrum when someone has no interest in him, like a certain "Virtue chick". He constantly makes crass remarks, finds Charlie and Vaggie's relationship "hot as fuck though" and basically his moral compass has a dick-shaped arrow. Charlie practices temperance and advocates the healthier parts of chastity, since losing oneself into lust isn't a good thing in the long run, but she also seems to lead a happy intimate life with her girlfriend.

The lust thing also ties about Adam's envy issues : Lucifer literally out bow-chicka-wow-wowed him, his first wife left, and Adam is overcompensating hard, pun unintended. Whatever others have or do, he'll want better or do better. He's in for his own comfort and fun, and whenever there's a threat of something better he doesn't have, he wants it. He HAS to be on top, or else the world might as well stop functioning, and is seen seeking Sera's approval. He'll try to sabotage everything out of pettiness, just like he outed Vaggie's true identity to Charlie, because the latter pointed out the truth. Charlie, on her side, is selfless, generous and genuinely wanting to help out, no matter the sometimes litteral cost. She took in Angel and Pentious, offered them a chance to be better, and doesn't resent them for their faults. For someone born as a Princess, she'd rather be addressed as a commoner and hates using her title to force things ("But that's so meaaaan !").

Adam is a selfish bastard that's all take and no give, hinted at his first rejection with Lilith. He thinks that, as the First Man, he's entitled to everything and should be given whatever he wants immediately. Charlie is very much the opposite, even being a bit too much give and almost no take.

Laziness ? Well, goes right in hand with letting himself go. Outside of the Exterminations, he barely does anything, and when he does, he makes it all about him. He's sitting on his own laurels due to the "achievement" of being the first human soul in Heaven, and hasn't bothered adapting his behavior any bit since. Charlie on her own side is diligent, committing to her wishes and dreams to save Sinners and redempt them that she's literally outside during (or right after) an Extermination, as seen when she meets Vaggie. She's also no stranger to pulling all-nighters and go through whole boards of plans to make it work.

And finally, pride. Oh boy saying that Adam is prideful is like stating that the universe is big. His first meeting with Charlie should tell you all you need to know. He's self-entitled, a pure breed of absolute self-centered jackass, and needs to have the spotlight on him or else he'll combust. Something not going his way, as seen when he gets his "original ass" trounced by Lucifer ? He goes for a balls-out tantrum, saying that people should worship him since "all of humanity came from these fucking nuts !" Compare Charlie who's too meek to truly put her foot down when only for herself (for friends she'll do it just fine) and hates to use her status as Princess of Hell. Whenever she gains confidence, it's never in a self-centered way : Ready For This has her asking "if you'll permit me" to others for the leader role, wanting to face the threat together with her army, on equal grounds. Even against Adam she's holding back (as hinted when tapping into more power when stopping him from landing a sneak attack on her dad), and is never bragging about her abilities.

So, in the end, what do we have ? A very flawed First Man (who is an outright villain) looking very close to a demon, versus a way more humane actual demon Princess. Which raises the question : what makes a bad person, and a good person ? As seen with Helluva Boss, so far outside of Mammon all of the seen Sins are very decent people that do indulge in vice, but know the limits and only do it with the ones that can handle it : Beelzebub encourages overindulgence and gluttony for its own sake, not escapism or self-destruction. Asmodeus is very vocally against forced lust, and under the façade also doesn't mind romance. Lucifer himself is very creative and has done astounishing feats, flaunting his power in Hell's Greatest Dad, but while he's low on self-worth and confidence after millenia of seeing only the worst, also teaches his daughter to stand up for herself ("You don't take shit from other demons.") AND is willing to use said power to help.

Bottom line : they don't harm others with it. And, ain't that kinda the whole thing ? Adam literally slaughter ex-humans, his own kind, out of twisted amusement, and hurts everyone around him to come out on top. Charlie is mindful and willing to help, while not forgetting herself in the process (more or less). Adam is clearly going overboard on all his vices while Charlie, who does have some too (drinking to the point of being actually drunk), is more balanced.

What makes one a jackass ? BEING a jackass. Nothing else.

Welp, this one is kinda the odd one out, dunno if I'll have more like that one but I hope you had fun.

Again, Masterpost here.

[caribouv]

Watch a ton of shit last week because didn't feel good.

The Girl With All The Gifts One of the best "go in blind" recommendations in a long, long time.

It came from a short story named Iphigenia In Aulis later turned into a full novel. Ray Bradbury system if I've ever seen one.

It seemed like everyone was doing fungus zombies after the 2008 PLANET EARTH episode on zombie ants. Last of Us is better, but this is still good even if the ending sucks.

Studio 666 I had to turn it off. You dudes are musicians, not actors. The ego of trying to do this was a bit too much for me to handle.

Outlast s01 I absolutely despised this shit. There were no clearly defined rules of interacting with other teams. Turns out, completely randomly, you're allowed to go into someone's camp and destroy their shit right in front of them and the other person had to sit back and watch you. Even though I pirated it, I want to sue Netflix for how bullshit this was.

All Things Must Pass It's a very cool documentary and extremely thought provoking. Also, I don't feel sorry for these fucking shitheads. It's plainly clear they should've got into the business of producing alongside distributing, had not been so greedy, but whatever.

The greedy businessman bullshit like stopping the sell of singles to force people to buy albums, pushing CDs because larger profit margin, not realizing what the fuck an mp3 was, and endless expansion (debt) because "muh growth."

I'm not super down for live music because I generally don't like it, but I'm not going to ignore how important live music is and a space for live music. I just love how these greedy fucks were directly responsible for napster and later itunes and then spotify and now back to napster.

STATION ELEVEN The theme of art and humanity transcending time, place, and generations.

The use of color to help the viewer understand where in time they were: before, during, after.

The perfection and blend of a clockwork and puzzle plot with a braided narrative. I was, quite literally, losing my mind the final two episodes.

I want to pinpoint the brilliant and wonderful winter solstice episode exploring the concept of 9 months after lockdown when all these women were giving birth at the same time.

I could write about this endlessly.

The only bad thing I will say is that it dragged at times, but I feel like that is me being too ignorant of Shakespeare's work to be realizing analogies / the adaptation from same.

SWARM. I'm not privy enough with Beyonce lore fully understand it, but it's still really, really good. The Billie Eilish episode was just utterly insane.

I almost turned it off so many times in the first two episodes because of how uncomfortable it made me feel and how creepy it seemed. I'm glad I kept at it and fought through my cringe. I wish I had someone to tell me the soft spoiler of "she's a butch lesbian and Marissa is her foster sister." It would have helped to put into context what erroneously seemed to be incredibly weird and creepy scenes otherwise.

Blood Quantum The sweet justice of American fracking ruining Native American's water supply causing all the Americans who drink it to turn into zombies while Native Americans remain immune. There's so many layers to that. Hell, that sounds like real life right now.

Blending that with the newfound Native American power of fuck the white man v. no lets help them a la Xavier v. Magneto split.

It was a great idea and concept, but those unique parts were not leaned into hard enough while dumb shit zombie fight sequences we've seen a million times took center stage instead.

Run Lola Run I haven't seen this since 8th grade. It's a short and sweet movie that gives another great take on the Chaos Theory. The soundtrack is phenomenally good. Not minimalist, but still 90s german techno af.

Doom Patrol I saw the DC logo on the opener and almost turned it off. "No no no I heard Brendan Fraser is in it give it a shot." Kept watching, opening sequences talking about "You're sick of comic book heroes we know! So we made comic book heroes who are SCREW UPS!" And I thought… Misfits? Misfits was great…

15 minutes later: It's just more comic book hero bullshit. Fuck that.

The Miseducation of Cameron Post I can't relate to this at all other than to endlessly bang my head against the wall and again point out how fucking incongruent these religious fuckers are and what they do to people. I kept thinking back over and over to Dead Poets Society.

[kaydeefalls]

Oooooooh, gay kickball fake dating

My most active WIP at the moment! I WILL get through it this month if it kills me.

So a close friend of mine IRL has been part of this gay kickball league for YEARS now and the idea of it has always amused me. They have 2-3 "seasons" a year and like 10ish full kickball teams that meet up once a week to play each other and then drink (and hook up) afterwards, my friend frequently gets hilariously day drunk after kickball. The thought of grown men (and occasional other, but this particular league is overwhelmingly cis gay men) playing this dumb made-up sport we used to play in elementary school gym class is just deeply amusing to me.

In TOG fic, though, I work very hard never to default any of them as American (apart from Nile), and I don't know how widespread kickball as a concept actually is outside of the US. So I've put them all in a gay soccer football club instead.

And then, y'know, fake dating.

He shouldn't be surprised that Andy corners him at the office again on Monday morning. "So you and Joe were getting pretty cozy the other night. Quỳnh says you even left together."

Nicky chuckles. "We left at the same time, yes, but that's all. So it looked real to you, hmm? That's good to know."

Andy's eyes narrow. "Explain."

"Joe wanted to piss off his ex, I offered to help. Apparently he's trying to 'win' the breakup."

"Joe is?"

"No, Stuart. Or, well, I think actually Joe has won the breakup no matter what, since he does not have to date that asshole anymore, but—" Nicky gestures vaguely, leaning back in his chair. "The point is, it's just for show."

"Well, you could've fooled me," Andy says. "This seems like an awful lot of effort for someone you didn't even want to play football with a few hours earlier."

"Ah, well, perhaps I was too quick to judge him. I like Joe just fine now, even if he does have highly questionable taste in men."

"Obviously," Andy says with a smirk, "if he's fake-dating you."

[deexchanel]

TFATWS

Word Count: 2,923

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x BlackFem!Reader

Warning: Swearing, arguing.

Summary: Y/N rides along with Sam, Zemo and Bucky to Madripoor.

A/N: I know this episode is over used but I write this and I just wanted to give you guys something after been absent for so long. My birthday is next week and I’m excited. Enjoy this one-shot.

They followed Zemo to his personal jet. An older man stood at the end of the stairs waiting on their arrival.

"So all this time you've been rich?" Sam asked looking at the jet. Y/N walked between him and Bucky behind Zemo. She hasn't really been talking to Bucky because of their argument.

It was basically about how he disappeared on her. He left without warning. The only reason the previous couple is around each other now because Y/N was there when Sam gave up the shield and decided to stay by his side through the journey. That’s how she ended up here on a plane with someone that broke her heart.

The reason why Bucky left because he’s scared to love. He’s scared that’s she was going to leave him because of his past since it was too much for her. So Bucky left and still hasn’t told her the reason why he did.

"I'm a Baron, Sam. My family was royalty until your friends destroyed my country." Zemo replied then spoke to the older gentleman in Russian. After the men greet each other the trio followed Zemo into the jet.

Bucky placed a hand on Y/N’s lower back to help her up the stairs, but she pushed his hand off. She had every right to be mad at him. Y/N really loves Bucky but he can't just leave her whenever he gets the chance.

Y/N sat in the chair in front of Zemo with Sam beside him and Bucky beside her. She nervously looked out the window, Y/N isn’t a big fan of heights.

"The fridge is out. But I will see if there is some good food in the galley." The man said to Zemo who replied in Sokovian. My nerves were getting really bad, She starts to fumble with her fingers.

"Y/N you okay?" Sam’s voice laced with concern. She turns to see them staring at her like a worried parent. Y/N gave them a small smile trying to ease their worries.

"I'm fine."

"Just checking Y/N. Why don't you tell us about where we are going Zemo?" Sam asked looking at Zemo for answers.

Zemo opened a book, "I'm sorry, I was just fascinated by this. I don't know what to call it but this part seems to be important." He pulled a little book that was inside the bigger book holding it up.

"Who is Nakajima?"

Bucky swiftly gets up wrapping his gloved hand around his neck. Y/N’s eyes widened from seeing how worked up he got up from that. All the nervousness about flying left her body.

"What the hell James??"

"If you touch that again, I'll kill you." Bucky seethed then unwrapped his hand from around Zemo's neck sitting back down. Y/N rolled her eyes at how dramatic he was. Deep down she wished it was her he was putting into place but no one needs to know that. (Our little secret.)

"I understand that list of names. People you've wronged as the Winter Soldier." Zemo said obviously not phased by what just happened.

"Don't push it," Bucky warned glancing at him then towards Sam.

"I've seen that book. It was Steve's when he came out of the ice. I told him about Trouble Man. He wrote it in that book. Did you hear it? What'd you think?" Sam amused but Bucky kept a straight face.

"I like '40s music, so..."

" '40s music? You definitely need to put me on some good music then." Y/N said engaging in their conversation. She thought it was kinda cute that he held on to the book Steve had. Bucky gave her a small smile.

"Whenever I get the chance, I will. Just for you."

Y/N bit her lip to keep from smiling to keep up the ‘I’m mad at him' act. But it wasn’t working.

"You didn't like it?" Sam asked shocked.

"I liked it." Bucky said giving him the face of 'duh I liked it.'

"It is a masterpiece, James. Complete. Comprehensive. It captures the African-American experience." Zemo said in the most formal way possible. Y/N gave a humorous smile nodding her head.

"That was one of the best ways to explain it."

"He's out of line, but he's right. It's great. Everybody loves Marvin Gaye" Sam agreed as if Bucky didn't agree. Y/N laughed at what he was doing.

"Sam, why are you still going on about it? James literally agreed."

"I like Marvin Gaye." Bucky continues looking at him.

"Steve adored Marvin Gaye," Sam said bringing up another memory of Steve.

"I have to go to the bathroom. Excuse me." Y/N held up the finger going to the mini bathroom. She struggled so damn hard in that small ass bathroom trying not to fall on her ass. Y/N soon came out to hear them talking about Madripoor.

"What's up with Madripoor? You talk about it like it's Skull Island." Sam questioned looking between the two who used to be villains.

"It's an island nation in the Indonesian archipelago. It was a private sanctuary back in the 1800s." Bucky starts while Zemo finished telling them the information.

"It's kept its lawless ways. But we cannot exactly walk in as ourselves. James, you will have to become someone you claim is gone."

Y/N glanced at Bucky who tensed up at those words. I knew it was going to be hard on him. Sitting back down in her seat, She moved the hair that was in her face.

"So who do I go as?"

"Miss Sapphire, one of the richest lady there. She models for every company you can think of." Zemo said showing Y/N a picture of a woman who looked exactly like her.

"Ooo I think I'm going to like this," Y/N smirked looking at the outfit that she was going to have to put on. She knew Bucky wasn't going to like it but oh well, its part of the job.

——————

Y/N was beside Sam as they walked down this empty bridge. She kept sneaking glances at Bucky because he looked so good with his new arm. Y/N didn’t know she staring too long when his eyes linked with hers. She quickly looked away, face turning really hot.

"We have to fix this. I'm the only one who looks like a pimp." Sam complained touching his suit. Y/N rolled her eyes, her feet were starting to hurt from walking for so long.

"Only an American would assume a fashion-forward black man looks like a pimp," Zemo said. Y/N’s walk began to turn into limping which made her fall behind a little.

A little "Ow." came from her mouth, grabbing Bucky's attention. He slowed down walking beside Y/N.

"You okay?"

"I'm good."

"No, you're not. You just said 'Ow'. What's wrong?"

"None of your business James. I'm okay."

"So you’re calling me James now? And I know your feet are hurting Y/N. Let me help."

Y/N decided to be stubborn even though she wanted to get off her feet so badly. "It's always been, James. I'm able to handle myself, I can take the pain."

Bucky rolled his eyes, in a matter of seconds, Y/N was in his arms bridal style. Not in the mood to argue, Y/N looked everywhere but him.

"And it's Bucky to you. It's always and forever going to be that to you."

"Before you left, it was Bucky. Now it's James. You know what, I can walk myself." She moved but his grip tightened not wanting her to get out of his arms.

"No, I'm going to continue to carry you," Bucky said but Y/N didn't respond which made it quiet between them. She fought the urge to look at him since she was mad.

"I saw you looking at me and my arm."

She looked up at him fulfilling her urge and they made eye contact. Y/N quickly looked away nervously "Um, no I wasn't."

Bucky let out a laugh, "You indeed was."

"Was not."

"Was too."

"Was not."

"Was too."

"Guys! for the love of God, shut up!"Sam scolded from in front of them.

"He started it!" Y/N replied back like a little kid. Bucky laughed a little then sigh.

"Y/N, you've barely said a word to me today. Did I do something?"

She scoffs getting irritated from that dumb-ass question. "DiD I dO sOmEtHiNg?? Huh? Bucky stop talking to me before I say something I might regret."

"What? Y/N I just asked a question." Bucky said in defense. She huff rolling her eyes, 'a dumb ass question at that'

"No matter what happens, we have to stay in character. Our lives depend on it. There's no margin for error." Zemo explained as the car came into view on the bridge. Bucky placed her down on her feet when they neared it, opening the door for Y/N who climbed in the middle seat.

——————

"Here we are."

Walking into the bar they could feel the intense stares. Bucky glared at anyone that looked in her direction. Y/N had to fight off any instinct to grab his hand. It wasn’t the appropriate time to do it.

You could hear the whispers of the crowd looking at them. "Is that the Winter Soldier?". Zemo guided them directly to the bar. A tall dark skin man walked over to the trio so they could order.

"Hello, lady and gentlemen. Wasn't expecting to see you, Sapphire and Smiling Tiger."

"His plans changed." Zemo nodded towards Sam. "We have business to do with Selby."

The bartender looked at Sam,"The usual? Anything for you Ms. Sapphire?"

Sam nodded his head while Y/N replied, "No, Thank you." The bartender turned around grabbing a dead snake out of a glass jar. She covered up her mouth to keep from gagging. Y/N turn to Bucky shaking her head no.

"Ah, Smiling Tiger, your favorite." I heard Zemo say from behind Y/N. She would’ve laughed but Y/N wanted to puke at the moment. She knew Sam had drunk it when Bucky looked the other way to keep from I guess laughing.

Y/N moved to the side of Bucky when a man walked up to Zemo from behind. "I got word from on high. You ain't welcome here."

"I have no business with the Power Broker, but if he insists, he can either come and talk to me." Zemo then pointed towards Bucky.

"New haircut?" The man asked but Bucky just stared.

"Or bring Selby for a chat." Zemo continued his deal. The man walked away not even giving an answer.

"A Power Broker? Really?" Bucky finally spoke up.

"Every kingdom needs its king. Let's just pray we stay under his radar." Zemo explained.

"Do you know him?" Sam whispered not wanting to give himself away.

"Only by reputation," Zemo replied. "In Madripoor he is judge, jury, and executioner."

Y/N leaned against the bar with my back facing the crowd. She felt a hand being placed on her lower back. The other hand moved Y/N’s hair from the side to show her neck.

"Sapphire, baby, we didn't get to finish from last night. Let's get out of here."

Y/N prepared to punch him but stopped herself when she heard Zemo say "Зимний Солдат, Атака" ( Winter Soldier, Attack.)

Y/N turn around to see it was a different man this time. He had a smirk on his face, as his index finger touched her bottom lip slowly then used the rest of his fingers running down her exposed chest.

Y/N had never felt so disgusted in her life. His fingers stopped on her boob when Bucky's metal hand swiftly grabbed it, crushing his hand.

You could tell that Bucky was so angry for him even getting close to Y/N. The man grunts out in pain as both of them walked away from her while Bucky still clutched on his hand.

The pair shared a quick look. The way he eased back into his Winter Soldier character bothered her a bit. Maybe he had it like a switch?

Y/N winced not really wanting to see none of the combat taking place so she turned around with her back facing the crowd.

She didn’t want him to feel he can protect her all the time. Y/N didn’t want to seem so dependent on him especially if he isn’t going to always be in the picture. When Y/N needed him, he wasn't there. Getting out of her thoughts when Bucky slammed the man that touched Y/N on top of the bar holding on to his neck, eyes never leaving his face.

Everyone around them starts to take their gun off safety. Y/N’s heart starts to pound as she looked around. Zemo placed a hand on Bucky's arms whispering.

"Stay in character or the whole bar turn on us."

Zemo says something else in Russian which makes Bucky let go of the man. "Selby will see you now." The bartender announced.

"Thank you," Zemo said then walked off.

"You good?" Sam asked Bucky concerned. He looked at me but Y/N quickly glanced at them then followed behind Zemo not uttering a word.

—————————-

Turns out Y/N wasn’t the one she wants to talk to since she was just some famous model. She had to stand in the hallway and wait on them. Y/N was so uncomfortable, especially with what she had on.

Y/N heard a gunshot which makes her kick in the door. Both Bucky and Sam aimed the gun at her then lowered it.

"What the hell happened in here?!" Y/N asked seeing the bodies on the floor.

"We'll explain later, let's go," Bucky said grabbing her hand and they all walked out of the building. They walked through the streets hearing surrounding people phones going off

"This is not good," Zemo said looking around at the people who looked on their phones. They near the end of the street when bullets aimed at us. Bucky pulled Y/N to him as they ran in one direction.

"I can't run in these heels!" Sam yelled while he ran.

"You better learn today!" Y/N yelled back holding on to Bucky's hand since it was in the heat of the moment, not wanting to let go.

——————

Sharon help killed off the bounty hunters they had on us. At the moment Y/N was in the bathroom getting ready for the party she was having. Finished with getting dressed, she walked out of the bathroom running into a hard chest.

"Oops sorry!"

"It's an okay doll."

Y/N gave him a small smile then began to walk to the room where everyone else was until Bucky grabbed her hand.

"Why didn’t answer my question from earlier? What did I do?"

"You know what you did Bucky. Is there I need to say?"

"I think I know what I did? I don’t know Y/N. Just talk to me. Tell me what’s on your mind.”

"To answer your dumb-ass question, you did do something wrong. You act like everything's okay between us when it's not! Bucky, you left me. Like disappeared on me without explaining why!"

"I knew telling you that I was leaving would crush you. I didn't want you to be hurt over the fact that I left." Bucky rubbed his hand over his mouth.

"Leaving you was the best way to protect you. I'm feared by many but that still doesn't mean you aren't going to be a target to hurt me."

"Best way to protect me?! You leaving hurt me way more than what you think it did. You're worried about protection but not focusing on my feels. You said you love me but you left like it wasn't nothing." I groan flustrated raising my voice. He couldn’t look at Y/N and it raised her suspicion.

“You’re lying Bucky? What is it? What is the truth.”

“Y/N... Please.”

“Bucky tell me!”

"I was scared Y/N! Scared that you were already planning to leave because of my past. I know I shouldn’t have left when you needed me but I didn’t know what to do. You deserve better than me Y/N.” Bucky confessed as his head dropped. I placed my hand under his chin so he could look me in the eyes.

“Bucky I could’ve told me. You leaving hurt me more than what you think it did. I love you and that means that I’ll understand anything you’re going through. I don’t deserve better, and I don’t want better. I want you Bucky. You’re not alone in this baby I swear.”

Bucky pulled Y/N to his chest, as she wrapped her arms around his waist. “I’m so sorry baby. I love you too Y/N so much.” He kissed Y/N’s forehead.

“Oh and I wanted to kill him so badly but I knew you weren't going to like that so I stopped."

"You know me so well."

Bucky apologized again, “I’ve missed you so much. I can’t wait to make up.” He began to kiss on her neck making Y/N tilt her head to the side so he could have more access.

"Hm, I'll accept it if you dance on the dance floor with me."

"No! God no. I'll do anything but that. You know I don't like dancing." Bucky pulled back groaning but she gave him the puppy eyes.

"Please? Or I'm going to stay mad at you."

Bucky rubbed his hand over his face, "Fine."

Y/N smiled jumping in his arms and they rested under her butt to keep her held up.

"Yayyy!! This is going to be fun."

"I’m only doing this for you baby.”

“That’s the best part.”

———————-

This took a long ass time to edit but I hope you guys like it. Like I said earlier I know this episode is overused but I had written this when tfatws was still airing so yeah.

I’m posting something since I haven’t posted in so long.

If this one-shot doesn’t make sense let me know cause it’s almost 3 am while I’m trying to edit and add stuff to this and I’m so sleepy 😂

Thank you for reading!

Stay slutty my friendsss 💕

[nezumasa]

Omg I'm right there with ya, purity culture has me at wits end. I've been seeing upwards of 5 posts a day talking about how "problematic" a new show, etc is and it's so tiring. People are so absorbed in technology that I think it's hard for some to differentiate between entertainment and politics/social justice. Every TV show has to be politically correct and progressive. Nothing can be solely for entertainment anymore. Even creators have to publicly disclose their beliefs to be allowed to exist

Honestly, every show is problematic (yeah cliche saying, but it’s a given) and sometimes we gotta look at that, but also like...analyzing that aspect isn’t “real activism” ya know? It feels like people are doing it to “look good” for others. Whoever can pinpoint the “problem” (or make up “plausible” shit with buzzwords) first gets brownie points. And sometimes I just want to watch dumb, problematic shit and talk about how much I love it without having to preface it with “well, I know its problematic but...” like some self-flagellating heretic or have people go at me with “did you know???”.

It’s like you can’t just say “I hated this show.” There has to be a “social justice-related” reason to it. Idk if I’m making sense, but I’m talking about “Rebecca Sugar supports fascists b/c the Gems didn’t die for their war crimes” level of bullshit and that was a real, straightfaced take back in the day.

Not every show has to deal with some deep issue either. Sometimes its brainless fun or a time passer.

Also you (general you) have gotta consider the different in culture and society. A lot of the times, things don’t necessarily translate. The “LGBT+” scene is radically different in some aspects between Western and Eastern Cultures at times. A lot of what I see is that some people overlay their own experiences with Western Society to Eastern Media with no understanding of the culture or atmosphere (ex. MDZS). I’ve seen people get on shows b/c it doesn’t fit their standards of what’s acceptable/cultural nuance didn’t translate.

Like I’m sorry, but shipping, show analysis, and whinging (as fun as it is) isn’t “real activism” unless it brings about a change or helps to bring about a change. Like...yes sometimes awfulness in shows must be talked about, but you don’t gotta do it with every show. Like...I used to be that way during my “Tumblr SJW” phase (and I use that with full seriousness b/c it was comical how stereotypical I was; I’m still left leaning but I am so glad I grew out of that shit), and it felt like shit to be angry all the time over cartoons and fiction.

Like...there is things to be said (and needs to be said) about the portrayals of minorities, women, other marginalized groups, etc. but I feel like a lot of people online have oversimplified the issues to the extent where it reflects American values, shallow analysis (in relation to media, culture, and tinged with their own personal tastes), and lacks the nuance of history, world politics, cultural understanding, etc.

Outside of that word salad, it’s basically...most people don’t have the understanding or qualifications to make broad claims as they do. It tends to be based on personal opinion and the assumption that everyone else in their group sees media in the same way. Anyone who doesn’t isn’t “knowledgable” enough or has some internalized issue. The “ad hominem.”

And part of it is because the world has grown to the point where the things you consume are your identity (ie. Consumerism on steroids). Everyone’s online idenitity (and real life identity tbh) and what they like habe been commodified and meshed together so much that people now “live” online. The whole problem of “what you consume is who you are” alongside the idea that everyone has to be “transparent” about their sex, gender, beliefs, etc.

Like...the whole movement of “unless you’re part of a group, you can’t make an ‘authentic’ character of thst group” for example. Yes, be respectful and there are some boundaries in creation, but like...I’ve seen creators out themselves and potentially their trauma as well so they aren’t ridiculed.

It’s honestly frightening to me b/c it forces creators to “out” themselves or face a dogpile and the end of a career.

I went on a tangent but it’s basically...sometimes politics and media can exist seperately (for the media piece in relation to enjoyment)/you don’t gotta nitpick every single thing/show visible and performative disgust. And you don’t need a “political” reason to hate it/love it or to broadcast it every time.

Idk, this is long and rambling but it’s late and hopefully it makes a smidge of sense.

Honestly it’s worse on Twitter. I’ve seen over 20 threads per day w/ luke warm takes with 10,000s of likes...like for example, they’re bullying the voice of Zuko rn for liking Zuko/Katara and that “Zuko and Katara can’t happen b/c its imperialism and colonialism” thread. Just say you don’t like it and go...not everything has to be political (Atla is to an extent considering subject matter but like...not every reason ya know? And it’s a children’s cartoon not CNN).

[lancetuckershairgel]

Summary: Chris Haven is a high school resource officer who comes across a troubled teen in need of more help than anyone could imagine.

Word count: 1,380

Warnings: language (warnings will be added as the story progresses)

Tag List: @southernbell91 @marvelgirl7 @book-dragon-13 @jobean12-blog @anxiousamandapanda @loricameback @randomfandompenguin @louisianaspell @spacemansam (if you wish to be added or removed in the tag list for this, let me know)

Chris sat in his patrol car parked outside the school building, looking at the front doors with discontent.  Another day of dealing with the fresh hell that awaited him within those walls. Chris liked kids, hell, he even liked his job most of the time but it was those few problem kids that made his job less than pleasant. 

"Just a few more weeks" he sighed, climbing out and walking inside 

Chris was greeted by the office staff and he made some small talk with a few of the teachers before he headed into his office and opened his computer to a slew of emails. Angry parents cussing him for daring to intervene with their child's behavior, concerned mothers going on about bullying, the usual. Not even five minutes into his work day the phone on his desk rang and he couldn't help but groan at the name that appeared on the screen.  

"Yeah?" Chris asked "What's she doing now?"

"Just get down here." 

Chris sighed and made his way down the locker lined hallway, heading in the direction he was needed. He asked already hear the screaming and saw that the principal and a few other teachers were  trying to defuse the situation but the crowd backed away when he neared, a look of relief on the principal's face when she saw him. He entered the classroom and assessed the situation, shaking his head. 

"You wanna get down from there and tell me what's going on?" Chris asked looking up at the teenage girl standing on her desk

"What's going on is a breech of the third amendment!" 

Chris resisted the urge to roll his eyes as he reached for her wrist, helping her down.

"You're housing a soldier?" he asked casually, leading her out of the classroom without incident 

"What? No. I meant the one about freedom of speech." 

"That's the First Amendment, Lucy"

"Whatever." 

 

"Sit."

Lucy sat down with a huff against the lockers, knees pulled to her chest, while Chris got the necessary details from her teacher. After a few minutes of speaking with Miss Alexander, the principal, he motioned for Lucy to join him. Reluctantly she got up and followed him back to his office. Chris sat down in the leather desk chair and leaned back, placing his hands behind his head. Instead of sitting, Lucy wandered around his office, picking up the rubix cube he had sat on a shelf. 

"What happened?" 

"Didn't Mr Furrow already tell you?" She asked, turning the sides of the colored cube 

"I want to hear your side."

Lucy sighed and turned to look at the officer. 

"Let's just cut to the chase and get to the punishment. I know you don't care about my side." 

"Lucy, you know that isn't true. I've always been fair with you. Sit down and tell me what happened." 

Lucy sat in her preferred chair. Not either of the ones across from his desk,  not the beanbag sat next to a bookshelf, but the white saucer chair covered with faux fur. 

"Do you know why I like sitting here, Chris?" 

"No, wh-"

"You never cared to ask." Lucy shrugged "I've always wanted one."

Chris leaned forward, resting his clasped hands on the desk. 

"Right." Lucy continued to turn the cube "Columbus Day is a load of horseshit and I told Mr Furrow that."

"Why is it...that?"

"Its so dumb how teachers aren't allowed to cuss. I bet every one of you swear like sailors when you're not at work."

"It's not appropriate"

"Its stupid. Anyway, Mr Furrow was preaching-"

"Teaching." Chris corrected her 

"Sure, let's go with that. Mr. Furrow was teaching about that asshole Christopher Columbus and how he discovered America. Then he explained why we celebrate Columbus Day, making this guy out to be a hero or something. So I told him he was wrong."

"Is he wrong?"

"Yeah. Columbus didn't discover America, he discovered some place in the Caribbean"

"What place?" 

Lucy narrowed her eyes. She knew Chris' game. He was testing her, making her talk. She hated him for it because she knew he was reading her. He looked at her as if he was trying to deduce everything that was going on in her head and figuring her out and the scary thing was, he usually could figure her out. She twisted the cube in her hand, looking away from him. 

"The West Indies. He thought he was in India, that's why we call Native Americans Indians. He was a racist prick who raped and murdered hundreds of people then took claim over a land that wasn't his"

"You're right."

"I know I am."

"But you can't tell your teachers that they're wrong."

"Why not? Because I'm a kid and they're the adult?"

"Exactly."

"How is that fair?"

"It isn't, but that's the rules."

"Fuck rules."

"Lucy." Chris warned, reaching for a notebook and handing it to her 

"What's this for?"

"I want you to write an apology letter to Mr Furrow."

"Oh for the love of-"

"Just do it and we can both go back to our day."

"Oh I'm sooo sorry to inconvenience you, Officer." 

She rolled her eyes and began writing. Chris answered the emails he had and rescheduled his mentoring sessions he was currently missing. Thirty minutes later Lucy placed the notebook on Chris' desk, along with the rubix cube. Without another word, she left Chris' office and he raised his eyebrows, picking up the brain teaser and pursing his lips.  

"Smart kid." He mused, turning the cube in his hand to see that she had figured the puzzle out, all six sides one solid color. He placed it back on his shelf without messing it up and went on about his day. 

Before working at the high school Chris worked at a juvenile detention center. As a former troubled teen, he felt drawn to these kids that just needed a guiding hand. He'd met  a lot of these kids over his years as a cop, but never anyone quite like Lucy. Lucy was opinionated, strong willed, and didn't take crap from anyone. When Chris had first shown up at the school, Lucy was aggressive and angry. He had worked with her, even though she fought him every step of the way, to see what worked for her. Eventually he found that bringing her to his office, a room he kept quiet and comfortable, lit only by a couple of dim lamps, would calm her down. He'd talk to her and ask her questions that made her open up and think. Shed never talk about her personal life outside of school, something he quickly learned not to ask her about if he wanted to keep her talking. He had once asked her why she seemed to wear the same thing every day ,a pair of torn and faded jeans and an oversized hoodie. It was t out of the ordinary for teens to be seen in the same hoodies, but even in the warmer months she'd wear the same thing. 

Lucy thought that everyone hated her. She had a chip on her shoulder, an attitude and scowl that made everyone distance themselves from her. She was never seen talking to anyone, always walking to class alone while other girls had friends by their sides. She never attended any after school functions, went on field trips, or did extra curricular activities. When Chris asked her why she just shrugged and told him that they were stupid. Lucy was smart, though. She studied hard, never missed an assignment, or a day of school. When Chris talked to her about her future and what she wanted to do she had told him that she wanted to go to college and get a good job, leaving her response at that. 

At the end of the day Chris called Lucy back to his office. After she had begrudgingly slumped down in one of the chairs in front of his desk he asked her about the rest of her day. 

"Sucked."

"Why?"

"Just did. Why do you care?" 

Chris sighed and scratched at the beard on his face. 

"What happened?"

"Nothing happened. I just don't want to be here."

"Would you rather be at home?"

"Fuck no." 

"Why not?"

[join-the-joywrite]

Women in War -- 2

All Maggie Maravillla ever wanted was to help people. She never imagined losing damn near everything when winning a war.

WiW masterpost

Chapter 2

1935

"I would've enlisted today if the war had gone on now, Buck, no hesitation. "

Maggie's laugh was long and had Steve not known how she meant her different laughs, it would have been mighty insulting.

Bucky grinned. "You wouldn't have lasted two days in training, pal."

Steve rolled his eyes, which caused him to wince as his headache protested. He pressed the ice pack against his forehead even harder. "Always a bully somewhere," he grumbled, "first Hodge, now these jerks."

"You just need to learn to pick your battles," Maggie said, smiling. "Or you could, you know, enjoy your birthday like a normal person."

"Not an option," Steve said, grinning at Maggie, "and aren't you supposed to be preparing for college? With Becky? In Cambridge?"

"Yeah, but I couldn't miss little Steve's birthday. Besides, you should cagar on Bucky. He brought me out to Brooklyn to see you. Becky has a couple of bonus quizzes tomorrow for the really -- desalado? -- the eager ones, and she really wants to excell. She's been talking about moving to London permanently. Apparently, the boys there are cute."

"How would she even know?" Steve asked. "She spends all day in your dorm studying."

"True," Maggie said, shrugging.

"All she knows is that American boys aren't," Bucky said.

"Ow," Steve said flatly, staring at Bucky.

"I actually had an orientation session this week," Maggie said, staring off to the side, "but it doesn't matter. As long as I keep my grades above average, I get to keep my scholarship. I didn't even expect to get in, let alone earn a scholarship."

"Don't sell yourself short, Mags," Bucky said, leaning back in his chair, "you're brilliant. We're proud of you for even going to college."

"It's hard sometimes. I know I've been here my whole life, but I grew up learning from Papá. Do you know how smart I am in Spanish?"

Steve smiled. "Yeah, we know."

"I actually have a hard time keeping up with you when you're mad, and I've been studying Spanish for like, six years. Tio Hugo is a miracle teacher, I'll give him that."

"You're just dumb," Steve said, rolling his eyes again.

"You'll make a fine doctor," Bucky told Maggie, ignoring Steve, "just set your sights on becoming the great Doctor Maravilla and never look back."

Maggie smiled. "Doctor Maravilla," she repeated, "sí, that's gonna be me."

The table was silent for a while. In the background, Evie could be heard chatting away from some friend of hers. The Barnes household was never truly silent. It was something Maggie always loved about Bucky's home -- her home, as Winnifred always made her feel. Maggie hated silence. Silence filled her own house on the days where her father went to work and she was left alone with her mother. Silence was what happened when the teachers caught her and Becky fighting with Hodge or any of his cronies. Silence was what happened when Angel had friends over. Everytime Maggie was subject to silence, it was around someone she didn't quite like.

Maggie hated silence more than she hated bullies. Maggie learnt English curses just to swear biligually whenever she was told to be silent.

So Maggie loved the Barnes household, where someone or the other would always be doing something. Sometimes it would be Allie and Steve arguing about who had the homework answers right. Sometimes it would be Evie loudly chatting on the telephone. Often, she could hear Winnifred and Becky bustling about in the kitchen, trying out new recipes and experimenting with bizarre flavours. Every odd weekend, George Barnes would make a loud noise in the garage, fiddling with some old piece of tech. Becky would join him too.

And very rarely, Maggie would hear Bucky humming to himself as he went about doing whatever he did.

"I ought to get going," Maggie said, wishing with all her heart that she could just stay in her home.

"Chin up, Mags," Steve said, "give it time, you'll be one of America's most sought-after doctors sooner or later."

Steve had no idea how right he was.

1939

Four years later, they found themselves in well into the midst of a world war.

Mi dulce Magpie,

I'm going to bind Steve to the leg of my dining room table and lock the table in someone's safe. He's heard about the war, you know. Do you remember when we had just graduated? You came from Cambridge for Steve's birthday. The little pedazo de mierda got it in his head then already about signing up for war. Now he tells me it's fate. Won't you write him a scathing letter, doll? Maybe he'll listen to you. I'd love to sit and write more, but Evie says she just saw Steve get dragged into an alley. Do remind my scatterbrained sister to read my letters. You're still coming home for Christmas, right? Allie misses your dumb face, doll. I hope to see you here at least a week in advance.

With love,

The better Barnes twin.

P.S. I'll only stop calling you Magpie if you stop calling me Buckwheat.

Maggie smiled as she folded up the letter again. She slipped it into her purse as she walked along the hallway.

"Can I help you, Miss?"

"No, thank you, I'm just here to visit someone."

The young woman raised her eyebrows at Maggie. "Ma'am. . . I don't--"

"I've been here before, angel, I know my way around the office. Mr Edwards' is straight down, right?"

"Er, yes. Uhm, good luck, ma'am."

Maggie never used the endearment 'angel' to mean anything other than 'estúpida mierda'. Making sure the letter she'd read thrice now was still tucked into her little bag, Maggie walked along until she came up on the open office out side Mr Edwards'.

"Rebecca Latimer Barnes, we'll be back after New Year's. We're not going off to war!"

The group of young women dispersed, allowing Maggie a glimpse of the woman that had previously been in the centre of the laughs and smiles. "Felicidades por el engagement, Peggy. Beck, we're gonna miss the plane."

Peggy Carter smiled. "Gracias, Maggie. Do say hello to everyone at home from me."

"You should send a photo, Pegs," Becky said, leaning on Peggy's desk, "although it's a pity Fred proposed. I was sure Buck would've liked to take you out."

Maggie laughed, despite being upset that Becky still hadn't left the office. "If that were true, we'd be offering Peggy condolences. Vamanos, Beck, your bag's already in the car."

Becky sighed dramatically. "I'll see you in the new year, ladies. Let's go, Dr Maravilla."

"Almost a doctor," Maggie said as she waved goodbye to the Bletchley Park women and left, Becky trailing behind.

"Back to work, ladies," Mr Edwards said as he opened his office door. "Miss Carter, a word?"

"Of course, Mr Edwards."

"Has Miss Barnes left already?"

"Just missed her, sir."

"Pity. Remind me to speak to her when she returns in the new year."

///////////////

Becky pulled her suitcase along behind her. "How'd you even meet the guy? And what are you doing for him that he's paying for both your education and our visits home?"

Maggie frowned as she thought back. "I was waiting tables in our eleventh year, you remember? He stopped by and I waited on him. He was a mess -- he still is -- and his food and drink fell everywhere. Last time I cursed like that was when that perra Lucy Kinney stole my shift at the hospital and I had to work the graveyard shift."

"You know, given that you work part-time in a hospital, I really wouldn't suggest calling it the graveyard shift."

Maggie smiled. "Very funny, Becks. Anyway, so he's surprisingly super apologetic about it. Turns out he was stressed over some college exams or something and long story short, we got to talking about college and he felt really bad about ruining my shift at the diner that he offered to pay for my college tuition -- provided I didn't slack off or things like that."

Becky shook her head. "I don't get it. Why? Why would someone just randomly decide to pay for someone else's tuition?"

"Well, he comes from a rich family."

"That makes it all the more unlikely that he'd be so generous."

"Look, Becks, I'm not gonna look a gift horse in the mouth. If the man sees potential in me and is willing to pay for college, I'm grabbing it with both hands and hanging on until I graduate. You and me both know my father could never afford getting me into medicine."

"Your mom could."

"Yeah, but who needs her help? I'm actually going to see her before I come by your place."

"I thought you were meeting your darling benefactor?"

"I am. I'm seeing them both today and then I'll come home. Do me a favour and fetch my father?"

"Sure, no problem. Did your darling benefactor call you a cab?"

"I called you a cab." Both women stopped walking at the new voice. "And we all know I'm not Maggie's darling benefactor."

"Howard," Maggie greeted, "good to see you."

Howard dipped his head slightly. "Mags. Mr Jarvis will take your bags to Ms Barnes' taxi, if you'd like?"

Maggie smiled at the young man following Howard. "Hola, Eddie, como estas?"

Jarvis smiled back. "Bien, gracias, Mags. ¿Y usted mismo?"

"Always a pleasure, Eddie. Thank you so much."

Jarvis nodded as he took hold of Maggie's suitcase and gestured for Becky to walk with him.

"So, darling benefactor?"

"She's insane. Leave it to the great Becky Barnes to see through the rosiest of rose-lenses."

"Isn't she a really good codebreaker?"

"Surprisingly, yes. She's actually one of two top codebreakers at Bletchley Park. Our friend Peggy is the other."

"Peggy . . . that wouldn't be Margaret Carter, would it?"

"It would. What a small world, Mr Stark."

"Indeed, Dr Maravilla, it's a very small world. Come on, we have business to discuss."

"Business?" Maggie echoed with a frown as she placed her hands around the arm Howard offered her.

"Business," Howard repeated with a nod, pulling Maggie through the busy airport.

///////////////

"Hypothetically? No. I went to Cambridge to study and become a doctor. I wouldn't want any part in your whimsical ideas, Howard."

"What if the situation weren't hypothetical?"

Maggie sipped her tea slowly. "No. Besides, you can't make superheroes. ¡Eso es ridículo! Maybe when you've got proof this . . . super soldier thing . . . will work, I will consider helping you out."

"Maggie, hear me out, you're England's finest and you're not even qualified yet. How they hate to say your name, because you're better than them all. I could really use your help on this."

"This was never hypothetical to begin with, was it?"

Meekly, Howard shook his head. "No. Look, there's this German doctor who's developing a formula. If I can just persuade some people upstairs to go after the doctor, we could have that formula. We could win the war before it's fully begun."

"I'm sorry, Howard. I truly appreciate all you've done for me, but this isn't the way to repay you. I can't understake . . . missions . . . without any solid proof that I'm doing something right. I'm really sorry, Howard, truly."

Howard nodded as Maggie gathered her things and stood up.

"What about a nurse?"

Howard's voice stopped Maggie. She stood behind his chair, staring at the door. Howard stared at her vacant seat.

"I wanted to be a doctor, Howard."

"You'll have to climb that ladder, Maggie, and you can either work as a nurse in that shitty hospital and sit through years and years of college until they finally think a young Hispanic woman is capable of being a fully-fledged doctor, or you can start as a base camp nurse and actually put your skills to use as you climb the ranks. Your skill is beyond the average nurse, Mags, and you'll get everyone to call you a doctor within months at best."

Maggie squinted at the door.

"Think about it," Howard said, stirring his cup. "I expect an answer by New Year's. Enjoy the Christmas week, Miss Maravilla."

"Likewise, Mr Stark," Maggie said as she left, realising just how much she loved being called Dr Maravilla.

///////////////

Bucky was waiting on the front steps when Maggie got out of the cab. She stood behind the front gate and smiled. "How long have you been sitting there, Buckwheat?"

"Not long, Magpie. How was your meeting with your mother?"

Maggie's expression twisted as she pushed open the gate and walked up to the steps. "I didn't go see her. I was with Howard all this time. He offered me a job."

"That's brilliant, Mags!"

"Sí, but not the job I want. Bucky, I want to be a doctor. Howard wants to make me an army nurse."

Bucky turned his head to look at the woman sitting beside him. "Why do you want to be a doctor, Maggie?"

"I want to help people, I want to fix them, I want to make them better."

"Well, doll, then maybe being an army nurse is more suited to you than studying forever at a college that doesn't really want it's girls to go out there."

"I don't know, Buck. I think I can be one of the lucky ones. I . . . just don't know."

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