#i've been so blocked with writing and drawing lately and so i'm trying this out for my review of Bugs Bunny Gets the Boid and i can feel it

[ducktracy]

sharing a very sage bit of advice from The Simpsons' own John Swartzwelder that i've been trying to hamper down in my writing and drawing alike. let your inner crappy little elf do his worst

[andhumanslovedstories]

I've been running this writing experiment lately to cut out phrases like "I felt" in my fiction writing. Like I was looking at a sentence in a draft that said, "he felt as if character's eyes were pinning him in place." And then I was like, "well, does he think that or is it true? As a result of this person watching him, he's froze. It's not like a thing, it is that thing."

Oh and "almost"! I'm always going, "He felt almost relieved that it hadn't happened." Well, did he feel better that it didn't happen or didn't he? Or "somewhat", I'm always going, "she felt somewhat perturbed."

And like none of that is wrong, to be clear. I don't know if it'd improve your writing, I don't even know if it'll improve my writing, but I use this sentence structure all the time so every viewpoint is from a voice that thinks about what it thinks, hedges its statements, and offers the same ability for wry little jokes formatted in the exact same way. And I have a lot of writing like that and I think (!) that they're good, but read as a whole, I'm like, "god, they all sound the same." Like there's one melody that I write songs to, so even with different lyrics, it's almost (!) the same song. Something I've been struggling with in regards to my writing and why I've felt so blocked is how boring I found writing my usual way. I'd read something and enjoy the individual parts of it, but then I'd step back and I didn't like the whole. And I got good at this enough at seeing that I didn't like it to do it in real time as I was writing, which as you can imagine didn't improve the process of writing because now I was bored AND dejected about being bored.

There's this sentence-level structure fact that I use unconsciously. A pattern I find easy is short sentence, short sentence, short sentence, long sentence. So I write that. "He [verbed]. He [verbed]. Then he [verbed]. As he [verbed] to his [consequence], he [verbed] that [noun] was [statement of condition]." Which could work, it often does make for a nice rhythm, but it's something I reach for often because it's easier for me.

Just last sentence, I originally typed, "I find it easier for me." But if what I mean is "using this pattern is less effort than another pattern," then it's easier for me. One voice is hedging its bets and the other asserting. Either is fine! But they're different! And, again, GOD you would not believe how many words I've cut out of this paragraph as I write it. I'm so chatty. I love using twelve words when six will do. And that gives my writing a specific tone to my ear.

So if I am bored of that tone, why not try using just the six words? Why be understated? Why be afraid of stronger opinions? So right now with my fiction, I'm experimenting with cutting out as many self-reflective words as I can. Sometime you do need to draw attention to the face that this is the character's interpretation, but like you definitely don't need to do it as much as I naturally want to do it. You don't need to always go out of your way to allow the possibility that the narrative voice is wrong. During editing, I trim the weaker ones (I originally typed, "what I consider the weaker ones" Is that more accurate?). But I think them being there in the first place shifts my language which shifts my character's which shifts my plot. It's sentence structure all the way down!!

(this barely applies to my writing on here, btw. i try to do good but yknow this is a tumblr blog. i'm not trying to get a lit mag to accept it.)

Anyway blah blah (chatty!) the point is I've been trying to write in a way opposite of my interests. Something that doesn't take itself too seriously, that emphasizes EMOTION and ACTION instead of minimizing it, and that clips through scenes at a good pace. Doing this been amazingly fun. I've been having such a good time doing it. I am writing so much because I really enjoy doing it. The process of writing is so fun again.

This post is about two things. One is my new mood stabilizer and therapy day camp. The other is about the benefit of pretending to be MXTX.

[eldstunga]

Hi! I really love your art! The lines are so bold but the colours so natural that it feels distinct but grounded?? I'm obsessed with the shapes in your work

I was wondering if you had any advice for drawing bodies? Whenever I try it either my proportions are off or an arm ends up looking like a calf or something.

First of all, thank you <3 That's so nice and I think "lines bold, colours natural" is some truly aspirational words to say about my art, I'll strive to be what you say I am <3 I do not, unfortunately, have any great tips on drawing bodies - it's a very wide topic and fundamentally just really bloody hard. I fail horribly 9 times out of 10. How to approach it I think varies a lot with like...HOW you are struggling, and who you are as a person. For proportions and anatomy there are definitely books to look at, and some rules of thumb that can help you - anything from "the shoulders are about 2.5-3 heads wide" through "feet are the same length as the forearm", "elbows are in line with the navel and the navel is two sternums down" etc etc. For me, realising just how big the ribcage actually is and learning how to use that as a unit of measure was a big event (the torso is about two ribcages long). Look at references, Draw over low opacity references and try to look for patterns that help YOU. Like... "Hm, do the shoulders line up with something useful?"

Having a good ref model to double check things helps too. The pen is pointing to about the bottom of the ribcage. But there's also stuff like maybe you're getting too hung up on construction and then it might help more to try to draw from references by ONLY blocking in a silhouette first. This helps me sometimes still:

Or you could be like me, struggle with all of the above and then some - like how to make poses look natural and/or dynamic? Weight distribution is a whole other topic.. gah, it never ends, but it's fun to learn.

Lastly, this took me way too long to realise and I think it should be said: Do not fret too much about STUDYING. The unfair thing is that the better you are at something, the better you will be at actually learning from doing studies and exercises or reading books. We accept this with many other disciplines and sports but rarely art. Mileage is king, and mileage is best gained from having fun and enjoying what you do. If you find studies suffering and frustrating you're probably better off just drawing what you enjoy and fuck it if it isn't "pushing your boundaries" or whatever. Eventually you'll get to the point where studies start to give more than they take, and then you're home free. I'm not gonna recommend a billion resources you likely won't enjoy but here are some things I genuinely found helpful lately: * a physical anatomy model, they're pricy and not necessary but being able to just look at it every now and then, turn it over etc helps. * The "Morpho" series of books, they do not teach anatomy, but they are very useful quick reference books and much more easily digested than most anatomy material. Just try to find a real anatomy book to read once your appetite is up as well.

The zig-zag/Lightning bolt method for arms and legs, fuckin' thing revolutionised how I sketch: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCkmB030GpQ

Gottfried Bammes "The Complete guide to Anatomy for Artists and Illustrators" This thing is insane, it's from the 50's and like 600 pages long. You could absolutely kill someone with it, but a lot of the pages are more philosophical or art history you can skip and despite its age and fear factor this dude writes in a witty, clever and just wonderful way that I've seen nowhere else. Fantastic photos. By far, FAR the best anatomy book I've ever seen. It's not a book I'd recommend for someone starting out, I would not have been able to digest it like four years ago, but once you get to a certain point it's amazing.

That's a lot, uhhh, feel free to ask me for more specific tips this was a bit of a rant. Hope some of it was useful!

[seeminglydark]

Idk if this means anything to you but I'm a comic artist who's had a hard time doing art for a few years. The first four was because of life hardship and lack of time/chronic pain, but now lately I've had time but a mental block. I'm creeping up on 30 and felt bad about myself for "missing out" on my opportunity to be a comic artist. It was really validating to see you post about being 41 (correct me if I'm wrong) especially since you have such wonderful comics that I've been following for a while now. It makes me feel less like I'm wasting my time putting my things in order when I "should" be drawing.

Hopefully this doesn't come across as offensive or anything. It was just comforting and validating. Anyway, big fan! Love your characters a whole lot and hope you have a good day!

Dear Anon

I am 41 years old. I have wanted to make comics my entire life. before my dad got sick, and my childhood kinda fell apart, all i did was draw. after that, i used the stories in my head to cope. life moved on. i was convinced not to accept a partial scholarship to an art school in California. life got hard. i worked at a hotel, and after i escaped an abusive relationship at 22 i hitchhiked/bused far far away to start over. i tried to make comics again, but i had to survive, and so i got another job doing the only thing i knew how to do, hotels. and i worked. and worked. and life got harder and times got heavier and i didn't get time to draw and i worked double hours, 15 to 17 hours a day. and i went four years without drawing a single thing.

i kept working myself into the ground. i was 29 now. i picked up a pen again and drew a red haired boy. he had a hard life and no love and no friends. his problems were on the outside, for everyone to see. he ran away but his problems went with him.

i was 32. surely i was too old now. my time to be an artist was gone. i had no school. no hope. i was so far behind the younger gen i saw online. i cried. all the time. i wrote stories in my email drafts while i worked shifts. i stayed up late trying to learn how to draw again. i cried some more. the boy grew. i called him Fiach. worthy. a raven. later i renamed him Avery. he was like a bird, he had wings, he was my hope. i started writing some friends for him. the people i wished i had around me.

i started finding time and space. i got a new job, something where i was lucky enough to set my own hours. for the first time i had a partner who believed in me. things were hard. but i was drawing now. and that helped.

i went on a road trip and i started drawing pages of an unnamed story on 6 by 8 paper in a sketchbook. i drew 20 of them. 'what could i call this?' i thought. Nothing Seems as Dark...no says my partner. Seemingly Dark. he made me a logo. i was 35. i bought an ipad, i cant do this on paper, its too much story i have too much to say. so i learned how to draw digitally by tracing my own trad art pages.

I spoke to my dad for the last time on June 17th, fathers day that year. he said 'you're good. i'm proud. and you're gonna do amazing things. none of this is your fault. and we will speak again soon.' i didn't know id never hear his voice again. he died a week later.

i turned 36. i kept trying. i'm old, i don't understand the internet. how can i share this?

i stumbled across Lore Olympus. i was introduced to webcomics. id read comics online before but the thought never occurred to me. i opened an account on Tapas. and then i stared at it. what if no one likes it. what if its bad. my art isn't good. i should wait til i'm better. but will i ever really be better? or will i always believe that tomorrow is better? do it now. if even one person gets something out of this story, this story about a boy who is you, a boy who looking for hope, a boy who might make it, then that is enough isn't it.

June 17th 2018 i launched Seemingly Dark.

SD's five year anniversary is in a week. 0ver 700 pages. leaps and bounds in progress with my skills. a printed comic under my belt as of monday. i was always a storyteller. but i was always an artist too.

I am 41 years old, dear anon. I did not truly embark on this journey til i was 35. life got in the way. even now, chronic illness gets in the way. but its worth it. its never ever too late. i believe in you the way my dad believed in me. i reset my life again and again. but I was always an artist. and if thats who you are, and who you want to be, even if things dont go the way you wished they could, you're an artist too.

im 41 years old. i speak about my age, even though i often feel too old to belong in spaces, cuz really, in this case age is just a number. take care of yourself. do what you need to do. and little by little, when your able, carve out your space until it becomes more of a habit. sometimes i think about all the years i lost not drawing or creating. but there's a lot of factors that make me believe had i made my story then, it wouldn't be the story it is now, i needed to live a bit. i needed to find myself. i know this was long, but i just wanted you to see i also had to put my life in order, and getting notes like this reminds me it wasnt at all a waste. im glad i could offer you some comfort. thats honestly the best compliment i could ever receive.

TL;dR I was 35 when i sat down and seriously started making comics, because life always got in the way and so did my confidence. i always feared being too old. im 41 now, still going strong.

[broodwolf221]

my message to new/returning fans

as da4 approaches and the fandom changes, gaining both new and returning users, i want to state very clearly:

share your thoughts! it doesn't have to be "original" to be valuable! no more than it needs to conform to current fanon! you don't need to read everyone else's theories in order to state your own

I'm familiar with that pressure and how much it can dampen the urge to share, to actually engage with the broader fandom. even though i was there at the start of dai's fandom, i fell out of it for years and came back recently, and there was a definite undercurrent of pressure to a) conform to the theories already stated, especially by big name fans, and b) to only ever post a truly original theory

the former inherently limits fandom and treats it more like an academic field that one needs to be familiar with before stating anything; the latter is fundamentally ridiculous, since we're all engaging with the same source material and have the ability to perceive foreshadowing and explore what it means. the first person to perceive and write about a bit of foreshadowing has no more fundamental "right" to that perspective than the hundredth

it can also be hard to wade through the tags of a fandom that's been out for a decade+, especially if you like a character or ship that gets a lot of hate. that's exhausting and no one is obligated to do that research

you're not too late to the fandom to have theories, to post meta, or to express your feelings. those of us currently in the fandom would do well to remember that new people will be joining us and they likely won't even know the bloggers who have already posted meta, so seeing someone ask if xyz has ever been considered should be treated as a valid question. seeing someone say they've never seen ppl talking about xyz should be viewed as an invitation to (gently!) point to some people who have talked about it. "oh, if you're into this idea, you might like [username's] meta"

i think it's valuable to draw attention to the fact that a long-established fandom has been getting new blood throughout the whole time it's been here, and will be getting considerably more new blood soon, and that it might be worth adapting to that early. because regardless of any established fan's preferences, we are going to be getting new fans unfamiliar with established theories/fanon. and no one should be beholden to fanon anyway

but all this is to also say - new fandom members? i see you. I'm here for you. if you want to know what's been said, you can ask me and i will direct you as best i can; if you want to come up with stuff on your own, i support that. i will never come onto your posts to "disprove" your theory or to claim it's unoriginal

also, know that when you see vent posts where people are feeling annoyed about fans or complaining about them, they are almost certainly talking about fans who are engaging in discourse, are argumentative, or are otherwise being kinda shitty. i know - from personal experience! - how easy it is to take a vague vent post personally, especially when the kind of behavior they're actually annoyed by isn't clarified, but it's unlikely to be directed at fans who are engaging with curiosity and excitement. being new to a fandom is intimidating and as someone who's trying to be respectful, it can be so easy to internalize messages from people's venting, but fr, it's rarely about new fans and their conclusions. that said, if those posts bother you… unfollow! or block! blocking is not a mean or cruel action

find your niche, curate your experience, and you will definitely find people who support you. I've really enjoyed my time here and met many people i care about and respect, but it was a bit of an uphill struggle early on and i know a message like this from an established voice in fandom would have helped ease my own concerns coming into this space

[imtrashraccoon]

Hello lovelies!

I haven't been posting much lately and I admit progress has been a bit slow on my wips. I'm still working on them of course but I've hit a bit of writer's block again. It pains me that this has happened and I'm working on trying to inspire myself by drawing or reading other people's fics.

The point of this little post is I'm wondering if having a beta reader would help? Or at least someone that wouldn't mind if I bounced ideas off of them?

I've never done this before except when I've managed to convince my sister to read something new I wrote. She's not into Undertale though and so doesn't quite get the weird things we get up to lol.

If you're interested, feel free to reach out through dm's or even just through this post. I'm not expecting anything official but if you have a good understanding of English and grammer, that'd be appreciated. Also, this should go without saying, but it'd also be good if you either have experience writing or enjoy reading Undertale or other works.

If you have any advice, I welcome that too! I've never thought of this before so I really don't know what I'm doing... (⁠-⁠_⁠-⁠;⁠)

[ablatheringblatherskite]

Summary:

After a difficult first year at Nevermore, Wednesday agrees to attend the Halloween Ball with Tyler.

Rating: General Audiences

Archive Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Additional Tags: Halloween, WydayThe13th, Phantom of the Opera references, Soft Wednesday Addams, Wednesday Addams is Soft for Tyler Galpin, Wednesday Addams is Trying, Hyde Tyler Galpin, Soft Tyler Galpin, Tyler Galpin Needs a Hug, Minor Ajax Petropolus/Enid Sinclair, Fluff, Comfort, Cheesy, Musical References, Oneshot, Author is a Tyler Galpin Apologist

SO I FINALLY FINISHED IT!! I honestly feel like i kind of hyped it up too much LOL but i'm just so happy and grateful I wrote it all, especially since I've been having a writer's block for months now. Thank the fact that I've been looping Phantom of the Opera for days now for the existence of this fic! I admit I might be a little out of practice writing Wednesday and the other chars, but better a little OOC than nothing imo!

Also I hope u don't mind how cheesy it gets LOL. It is a fluff fic after all!

Thank you again @bithablu for organizing this!! It was so much fun to join even if I was really late LMAO. Thank you @nouklea, @thee-antler-queen, @wednesdayandherhyde, @nonamemanga, @broken-everlark, @gardenoblues and @rhysthomas02 for encouraging me as well!! (whether it be directly or through likes LOL)

Also if anyone wants to draw Tyler and Wednesday in their costumes (or even Ajax and Enid) pls feel free and pls tag me if u do it would be so beautiful

[twisted-wonderland-shenanigans]

So...a little context behind this poll.

Lately, I've felt like I accidentally pigeonholed myself into trying to control what I write and post when it comes to my longer fics. It's been frustrating finding myself stuck and trying to figure out how to get out of that block, and as a result I've been trying to work on personal projects involving my own OCs with Twisted Wonderland just so I can feel like I've done something productive.

I have ideas for the stories from previous polls. I know what I want to do. But I just...got so stuck on one specific fic I promised to finish writing and post first, and now I'm literally stuck trying to get the words flowing. So I had a thought while trying to answer an ask:

Why not do a little rewrite of the very post here that began the Monster!AU and blossomed it into what could possibly be my most popular AU on this blog? (Seriously, thank you all so much who love the AU, I did not expect it to get as popular as it did ;;v;; )

It won't be a full-on prologue rewrite like I said before (possibly up to when Yuu gets taken to Ramshackle and mini!Yuu goes with Crowley and the other staff for the night, though we shall see where inspiration takes me), but I want to flesh it out more with the worldbuilding I've done so far. I also want to expand upon the fact that while these boys may have some humanoid features, they are--in fact--monsters compared to Yuu. I feel like it'll be a fun challenge, like a "before and after" art challenge people tend to do with old drawings, except with writing!

Let me know what you guys think! Poll will close in a day.

And from now on, I'm going to just...let myself be as creative as I want to be and just post whatever I get inspired to finish rather than trying to plan it out. I want you guys to enjoy the stuff I create just as much as I have fun brainstorming and developing all these ideas you all have sent me ;;v;;

[wisemins]

heyy🕺

so I checked your f/o list and I saw not only do u ship w stan but also ford!?🧐 incredibly based😌 since I have gravity falls brainrot this is my obligatory ask about your s/i if you have one👀 if not use this as gush pass🎫

side note: do u prefer being called miya or starshine? because I saw someone refer to you as miya once and that's what I've been doing but you and some others refer to you as starshine so uh I just wanted to check🧍🏽

second side note: are you okay with sharing stanley? I understand if not, I only have 1 tag for him so far (💗: stan💸) if you want to block it. okay done for real🏃🏽‍♀️

@i-put-the-s4p-in-s4pphic

YYAYAYAAAA I've been waiting forever to be able to answer this but I've been so busy with work!!! OH BOYYY IM SO EXCITED TO ANSWERR

Gravity Falls is like one of my all time 'tisms, like I have seen it an unholy amount of times, I've never kept track of just how many times. I used to just have it on 24/7 as background noise around my house. I know this show like the back of my hand and I simply adore it!!! okay so-- I've also been shipping in it since I first got into it, but eventually I wasn't shipping in it anymore and just enjoyed it for what it was-- until I rewatched it in my adulthood.

Now, I used to only ship with Ford, but...well, my crusty old man taste had developed to fruition already in 2021 so Stanley was instantly looking FOOOOOINEEE as hell alongside Stanford. So then it was-- I was shipping with both of them. Separately, though. Definitely needed different canons for it to work, since Ford and I have a much different relationship than Stan and I, but I'm honestly still working on my lore with Ford now that things have changed and that I'm much older. There's just more potential with him in terms of intergalactic/dimensional stuff!

So in terms of Stan and me, we're mostly just very domestic and comfortable outside of the crazy canon lore! I started off working at the mystery shack, helping Stan with his crazy ideas for new creatures and attractions, I also helped out a lot with sales and tours! But eventually we both just clicked and I discovered that I in fact LOVEDDDD that old man. And as it turns out he felt the same too!! He was more hesitant, for obvious reasons. A considerable age gap, the fact that he's a lot more insecure than he lets on, people in general think he's disgusting and conniving and a scammer, but I like his style! I never judged him like that, I get where he's coming from, and we've both been through a lot in our lives so we tend to relate A LOT despite the generational difference. But we're mostly just a very doting couple who makes the dream happen, we hustle and we take care of the twins! And also try to keep them out of trouble, to the best of our abilities. Stan and I are only dating, but if I were to ever have the pleasure of marrying him-- well I'd be honored to be any sort of caretaker figure to them!

Now, me and Ford? Our relationship depends on *when* we met. Currently I have two timeline ideas, but for now I'll focus on one where he's also a crusty old man. We relate a lot as well, just on a different level! We're both giga nerds, love to write and draw, are nervous wrecks but simultaneously too oblivious for our own good. We do have our own version of a domestic life, one that just includes more weird happenings and nerd stuff! Lots of D&D&moreD, talking and theorizing, and a lot of dorky longing looks and late nights of working on stuff together. I'd like to think in this version of myself in Gravity Falls, I'd be more akin to the weirdness and was far more aware of it than I would be if I was with Stan, seeing as Stanley would most likely try to shield me from it than make me aware.

Also you can call me either or honestly!! Miya is my real name so it's more personable (I would be honored if you felt comfortable enough to call me as such!), and Starshine is just a cute nickname that my mans Wonka calls me along with some other mutuals! or if you want another *another* nickname, you can also go with Marnie!

Also I am super duper cool with sharing Stan!!! for so many years...i have felt alone in my Stan loving because he was the "gross" twin that only very few people actually liked 😭😭 So the solidarity and the sharing of joy in this crusty old man is ALWAYS welcome!!!

tysm for the ask once again Frankie!!!! MY BELOVED MUTUALLL <333

[a-writers-blurbs]

A bit of a disclaimer ig...

Hi guys,

This is going to be a long post that sounds slightly rant-y & I'm going to apologize in advance for that. I am going to make exactly ONE post (this one) about this topic, and I will not be discussing it further or posting about it again. I will also not be responding to any negative comments but deleting them instead.

These are my personal opinions and [...not *trying* to sound rude, but there's no other way to say it...] a bunch of random people online aren't going to change my opinions.

My husband is an artist. He does canvas painting & draws comic books (think anti-hero dark horse). I paint furniture (kinda mini murals) & make chibi drawings. I've also been writing fanfiction since the late 90s.

That being said, this post is about AI art.

I get the controversy, I do. But I've heard this argument before, when fanfiction became more popularized. The whole "You're just stealing someone else's work & changing it up to call it your own" is (at its core) the same argument against AI. The only difference is that instead of you yourself changing it, you're allowing a machine to do it.

But I digress...

Over the last week, I have received several messages about my use of AI art. First & foremost, my stuff is appropriately tagged as AI.

Second, I don't sell or advertise these pictures in any way. In fact, none of them have been posted anywhere but here (as of 6/1/24).

Third, and probably most important, I DONT MAKE THEM FOR YALL. Fanfiction & fanart are a HOBBY. It is something that I do because I enjoy it and it destresses me. I DO NOT do it, hoping I'll get 1000s of followers, views, likes, etc. Every story I write, I print & bind for my library. I will now be doing the same with my AI pictures.

I have a condition that has a symptom called Maladaptive Daydreaming. Because of this, my head is full of an alarming amount of excruciatingly detailed & unrealistic scenarios and images. (To the point that it affects my everyday life).

I can't necessarily recreate the images in my mind without help & the only way to get rid of the random scenarios is to write them out. So I do write them. And now I use AI to help me get a BASE image. I do still go in myself and edit/redraw parts of each generated image to fit them to the characters I want them to represent. I do thus using digital art.

Granted, there's a whole other group of people that think digital art isn't real art... but that's a discussion for another day. Anyway...

TLDR:

I use AI art & will continue to despite some people's dislike. I will continue to delete any and all comments left publicly that are malicious, rude, or condescending. My stories & are are for me. If others enjoy it, great, that's freaking awesome. If not, there are literally thousands of other fanfic authors you can follow instead of me.

Again, I apologize, I know this sounds rude. But I need to be 100% transparent on this one. I am extremely grateful for every folllower & reader I have. I won't lie & say comments/positive interaction isn't a serotonin boost because it is. Yall also give me more motivation to actually complete a story vs. moving on to the next idea. But I'm not going to change the way I do things to appease someone I don't even know.

This is one of the few things I enjoy doing in my free time & have been doing it for 25 years now, and in the last 5 or so years ALL fandoms have gotten so toxic its hard to enjoy anything anymore. Last time it got like this, I simply stopped posting. I'd rather not do that again, but if people (who aren't even following me) don't leave me alone, I'll probably have to do it again, sadly.

But for now, hopefully this post will give people with different opinions to go ahead and block me from their feed. We're not going to agree so instead of wasting energy arguing, let's keep the peace & agree to stay off if each others feeds.

I won't judge you on your idea that you feel it's your duty to harass people over their choices & you won't judge me for enjoying something. 😉

Thank you for listening. Love yall & and I hope your day is blessed!

[dimonds456]

Howdy!

I'm Dimonds456, and welcome to my garbage pile. I'm a bat who stays up way too late and cannot decide whether or not to be productive. I draw, write, animate, play/write music, and I'm also insane so watch out for that.

I'm neurodivergent, disabled, queer, white, a singlet, fictionkin, and a proud cat papa. I am a cartoon character who is way too bouncy for their own good lol.

They / he / xe!

This is my main blog, but my ADHD ass also has a bunch more.

@dimonds456-art - my art blog! Almost all art gets rbed there!

@dimonds456-but-only-hlvrai - my HLVRAI sideblog! Because yeah why not. This is one of me current hyperfixations lol it's bad

@rubberhose-roy is my sideblog used to gush about 1920's-40's aesthetics, music, culture, ect., as well as an animation blog! All my animations specifically will be reblogged there, as well as any animation rambles or gushes I do.

I have more but those are the main three.

My fandom-specific blogs are:

@dimonds456-but-only-hlvrai (again)

@hlvrai-stuck-together - HLVRAI AU I run!

@halfnautica - Half Life / Subnautica AU!

@a-second-chance-su-au - Old SU AU that has been discontinued, but the blog is still there!

@batim-rewritten - a Bendy and the Ink Machine rewrite I'm working on

@cuphead-contract-au - A Cuphead AU where Mugman makes a deal (discontinued)

And, I have my own OC story, Follychromatic! I reblog all that stuff here, but its main blog is here!

@follychromatic

To see pictures of my cats, check the #Checkers and Chess tag! :D

Okay great. Now, DNI, trigger warnings, disabilities, special interests, and more below the cut. Make sure you read at least once, k? Thanks.

Welcome to my cave!

DNI

Do not FUCKING interact if you are:

- Someone who ships pedophilic, incestuous, or abusive ships while portraying them as positive and a good thing

- A bigot

- An LGBTphobe / transmed / ect

- Trump supporter

- Nazi / fascist / conservative

- Weird about furries or furry art

- Weird about fandom headcanons (specifically trans woman headcanons)

Trigger Warnings

I will tag as much as I can, and if you want me to tag something specific, let me know! But as a general blog cover, things that appear on this blog often are:

- Current events

- Talk of / discussion of sexuality (sometimes boardering on NSFW but not usually)

- Blood

- Guns

- Flashing

- Talk of proshippers (I try to be respectful but also I don't stand for them and I don't support them. I block and move on, and try to explain why proship is bad, but eh. I've only been listened to like once lol)

- Swearing / swear words

- All caps

- Bugs

- Suggestive content / NSFW (RARE DONT WORRY)

I will add more if anyone wants me to, or we can come up with a custom tag, like what I do for one of my friends! (#dimond don't look)

DISABILITIES

Hiiii I'm disabled! Both mentally and physically. I talk about being disabled a lot and try to generate positive talk about it. I also vent about it. I've had quite a few of these, and I also try to reblog as much about others I don't have as I can to increase awareness and understanding. So yeah! These are just the ones I have, but they are not the only ones that appear on my blog!

Hyperthyroidism

Graves Disease

Graves Eye Disease

Astigmatism

Athsma

Audio processing disorder

ADHD

Autism

Trauma / PTSD

Brain fog / disassociation / memory loss

Anxiety

Depression

Cane user

Weak / trembling limbs / trouble walking / trouble holding onto things sometimes

More to be added lol.

This is also a meds/treatment positive blog, a self-diagnosis positive blog, and my general attitude is just "if you think something is wrong you're probably right, you know yourself the best, even if you don't know what exactly is wrong." This attitude has saved my life and other people I know. You don't need a diagnosis or medication to be disabled.

THIS IS A SAFE SPACE.

If you are Jewish, black, brown, Muslim, indigenous, any religion, any race, any sexuality, any weird gender, anything at all- I love and support you. I'm still learning, and I try to learn as much as I can, but I'm not perfect. If I say something offensive or something adjacent, it was NOT on purpose. PLEASE, PLEASE tell me what I said wrong. I will make an effort to improve in the future.

I directly support:

- All races

- All religions*

- All sexualities (except pedos, y'all aren't LGBT, I'm sorry. You're actively hurting children. I've seen it again and again. Stop.)

- All genders and pronouns

- All "weird" identities outside of that as well (I'm fictionkin myself)

- Protests and protesters

- Neurodivergent people of all types (and yes, this means NPD, schizo, and all those other types that are often seen as bad or evil. I love you, I see you, and I support you.)

- DID & OSDD systems

I DO NOT support:

- Antisemitism

- Genocide

- Cults (*stuff like Jehova's Witnesses. I support the members, as they are victims, but I actively dislike the people on top who perpetuate the cycle. Not just JWs, but those are the big ones who come to mind. Hearts out to all the victims, I hope everyone gets to a better place soon)

- Racism in any way, shape, or form

- Religious discrimination of any way, shape, or form

- Israel specifically

- Trump, conservatives, Nazis, ect.

- Endo systems

If I have reblogged or said anything that aligns with the bottom list, that was a mistake. PLEASE let me know and I will fix it as fast as I can. You reading this right now, I love you. I hope my blog can help you feel welcomed and like you have somewhere to go if you need it. /gen

MY FANDOMS / INTERESTS

I HAVE ADHD AND AUTISM AND I'M MAKING THAT EVERYONE ELSE'S PROBLEM /silly

The current special interests are HLVRAI and Half Life, current hyperfixations are Half Life and Poppy Playtime.

SPECIAL INTERESTS:

- Minecraft

- HTTYD

- FNaF

- Undertale / Deltarune

- BATIM / BATDR (unfortunately)

- Subnautica

- Biology

- Steven Universe

- Cuphead

- 2D Animation

- Writing

- HLVRAI

- Half Life

HYPERFIXATIONS (interests but not the special ones):

- Little Nightmares

- Hello, Neighbor (unfortunately)

- Petscop

- Portal

- Freemanverse (HELP ME)

- The Amazing Digital Circus

- The Owl House

- Gravity Falls

- Monster High (very first from what I can remember! I remember nothing though! But it's there!)

- Poppy Playtime

- Half Life

- Wild Kratts (I didn't even know there WAS a fandom until very recently, hi guys)

theres more but my brain is an egg :/

When it comes to ✨me,✨ I have a couple of original works as well! Specifically, Follychromatic! I won't get too into it here (bc shy) but it's 2D animation, rubberhose animation, magic, character-driven, action/adventure, mystery- yeah!

Outside of fandom, though, my special interests are biology, 2D animation, and writing. I am an animator and I suffer for fun.

YOU MADE IT! Have some Checkers and Chess pictures for your time! :)

[yorshie]

can I be extra extra nosey 👀👀👀👀 ?

otherwise feel free to pick and choose hehe but these ones interested me to know the answers to ✨️

🌵 ⇢ share the link to a playlist you love

🕯️ ⇢ on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? why is that?

🛼 ⇢ describe your latest wip with five emojis

🪐 ⇢ name three good things going on in your life right now

🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

🦷 ⇢ share some personal wisdom or a life hack you swear on

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best? 

🏜️ ⇢ what's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?

🦋 ⇢ share something that has been on your heart and mind lately 

🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here

🎨 ⇢ link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

Hi Keisha! Please uh.... please just ignore how long it's been since you asked me this lol. I'm so sorry.

And of course! you can always ask as many emojis as you want :p

A playlist that i love? right now I've been listening to Lucky's Leo playlist :3.

a five, but that's because i hate editing my own work but I love editing for other people lol

💜🐢🎧😱🥺

i've got an amazing group of friends! I'm starting to not hate exercise again! and my garden is chugging along nicely!

weirdest topic is probably how different type of wounds actually affect the human body and how adrenaline actually works and it's limits :3

personal wisdom.... hm.... if you're stuck on a project step away from it a bit and try something else! Come back with fresh eyes.

dream theme for a plot or fanfic would would probably include pining and hopeless fools in love :3. as to would write it best, i really can't pick, because i like to see how different artists approach a story.

my favorite type of comment to receive on a fic is any comment! keyboard smashes, "h", or long thought processes, any type of comment is a good comment

I really want to just remind everyone that fandom is exactly what you make of it. Your writing is YOUR writing, your art is YOUR art. Don't worry so much about what other people Want to see you do, do something that makes YOU happy. Write the self indulgent story, whether it be more comfort or more hurt. Draw the self insert art. Dabble with Y/N, reader, or create your own OCs. Don't let someone else set boundaries for how You enjoy creating for a fandom. Someone is always going to have an "opinion" on it, but at the end of the day it's not Their decision. and you know. the block button is right there lol. Just have fun, please remember fandom is suppose to be Fun.

The baby fine hairs at the base of her neck lifted when she stalled at a red light crossing, and without thinking Winnie rubbed the thin skin, frowning and regretting once more her decision to forgo the jacket. The light changed to the little green walking man, and she stepped - :3

@hitwiththetmnt drew a comic for one of my fics a little while ago, and I love it SO much. I go back and reread it probably more than I do Cistern lol. Link to the comic here.

hm honestly not much? there are a few stereotypes that i don't really like but usually i tough it out because everyone has a different view of the world..... oh. I can mention a pet peeve though. If you have something that's a pretty common trigger in a story, and you purposefully leave it out, I don't like that. I've seen it discussed a few times and I just don't think the people understand that they're likely to drive people away from their stories if they keep doing this as a "shock value".

[beepborpdoodledorp]

Another RE:Breach Update

Hey all, I'm back again with more info as to what the hell's been going on with RE:Breach lately. I'll try to keep it short but there is a lot to cover so bear with me.

So, I'll be honest, RE:Breach is not going how I planned. Not in terms of the story or anything, just the factors outside of it. I wanted to keep it a secret, but considering there's basically a 0% chance any of this will actually go the way I wanted it to I'll just reveal it now: the initial plan was to update the character renders, make chapter illustrations, and update the fic with the illustrations and fixed grammar/better sentence structure/etc. Then in November, for the fic's first anniversary, I would drop the official RE:Breach website that would compile the fics, the drawings, and some bonus stuff (wouldn't be removing the fics off AO3, just giving them another place to be read). Then I'd start dropping the sequel fics.

The new character renders are done; I started them in January, and didn't get them done until June. Then I started the chapter illustrations in July: out of the eighteen I had planned, I only got three done. Alongside that I wanted to get a head start with writing the sequel fics, so I started on the midquel, RE:Start, in about April or May or so (I think, I can't pinpoint exactly when I started writing). I literally just finished the third chapter yesterday after months of being stuck on it.

My work ethic is fucked, and it has been for a couple months now. I don't think it has to do with me still recovering from the writing marathon that was RE:Breach itself, I think I've just been hit with a depressive wave with how tired and demotivated I've been for the past few months. And everything that happened in my shitshow country in July didn't exactly help matters. And also my cat being sick and constantly needing to be shuffled to the vet the past week. That's fun.

I came into RE:Breach knowing that, with the sequels I had planned, this would be a multi-year-long endeavor. And I'm still planning on it - RE:Breach's sequels are still not canceled, I love the original game and the fic I've used to expand upon it too much to leave it behind, and the support for it has been so immense and amazing. But a part of me does regret jumping into it so suddenly, even if I did know what I was getting into: after Ruin released I just had a giant burst of creative energy I needed to get out, so I started writing RE:Breach with little planning and even less for the sequels. And, aside from basic outlines of what I want the sequels to be about and a few specific scenes, I still don't have much to go off of for them.

I know that all of these deadlines and the pressure that comes from them is really no one's fault but my own: no one's asking me to get the chapter illustrations and fic update out by a certain time, no one's asking me to get the website out by the anniversary, and no one's asking for the sequels to be out by a certain date. But considering it's now been six months since RE:Breach ended and I promised sequels, and I thought there would be sequels out by this point (the pride month prequel oneshot doesn't count I literally made that last minute because I had artist's block), I feel beyond icky that I'm still stuck polishing the first fic when I should've had it in the absolute best state it could be in when I first released it. 

TL;DR: RE:Breach is still alive, I am just going at the pace of a sloth that snorted molasses because depression is a little bitch and also all of the external factors in my life are going batshit too. I will complete everything I planned for RE:Breach even if it takes me a decade - which I really, really hope it won't.

[nyhne]

Hey! Figured I'd make a pinned post since that seems to be the thing now and I know my 'about' page isn't as accessible these days :x

I'm Roshon! (row-shawn) No pronouns preferred, they/them second best. Adult, queer, sometimes I do art stuff, sometimes I write, mostly I lurk.

***

Me: I've been off and on tumblr since 2011, most recently off for a long time and just now back on so I'm still catching up. Kinda. I draw, sometimes, and post art under #roshon's art. I'm semi-furry, which is to say I mostly draw anthro art but am not super involved in the furry community. My fursona is a maned wolf! I also have some other OCs that maybe one day I'll flesh out more. I'm an adult, live in the PNW, and am kink and 'queer as inclusive rather than exclusive' positive. I work in landscape construction, keep a lot of houseplants, have gotten into fish keeping over the past couple of years, and have been lucky to live in a number of neat places throughout my life. c:

My tumblr: Being here always brings out my old fandom interests, which lately has been a lot of Hetalia (and by Hetalia I mostly mean PruAus or most stuff to do with Austria as a general), and the usual miscellaneous fandoms we all seem to have (Pokemon, Gravity Falls, Steven Universe? Warriors? Idk). I try and keep a pretty diligent tagging system for your blocking/seeking needs (and my satisfaction). Yes, my fandom headcanons are probably outdated. Yes, they probably contradict each other at times. No, I do not care.

And speaking of fandom, I do write fanfiction on occasion.

Ao3: Nyhne

FF: Nyhne

***

Anyway not much else to say. I'm pretty open about my social media and try to keep an open door if you ever wanna chat. c: Chickensmoothie | Instagram | TikTok

I have a few side blogs you might get notifications from: @thatothernyhne is my shits and giggles reblog blog. @thesimpleleaf is my all plants all the time blog.

I don't really have any DNI's, but know that I don't like terfs and I have a pretty mean right punch because I move several tons of material every week ccc':

[souglias]

I see there's still a slot left for foul legacy: raging tide so I hope I'm not too late to request something 👀

Three things about me:

As I said in my other ask, I love to draw and write and I try to do that as much as I can during my free time between hw and class. Although it's been much harder to find time during college and I am often plagued with art/ writer's block 😔

I'm a bio major and I have no problem with handling bugs and other little critters that most people get queasy about. Once you've dissected sheep brains and whole squids, grabbing a spider isn't such a big deal lol

It generally takes me a while to start seeing someone as a close friend rather than a friendly acquaintance that I sometimes see in class. In the same vein it also takes me a while to begin considering someone as a possible romantic partner bc I only start to feel attraction after I've known them for a while and established an emotional connection

I'm a big fan of the star student/delinquent trope and even though I'm not really the type that only cares about studying, I do generally prioritize that over other things

Thank you in advance!! I can't wait to see the rest of this event unfold :D

The Delinquent [Childe]

c/w: mentions and implications of rumours, implication of bad school culture, Biology dissection (not described in detail)

Note: Hello!! I'm so so sorry this fic took so long! I wasn't particularly inspired for this fic so I was holding it off, then school came in the way for quite a bit. I don't know much about dissections, but I did a quick Google search and I hope I've written it such that it's not too difficult to believe. I hope that you enjoy this!

word count: 1.5k

--

Sun and moon. Both you and Childe live worlds apart. The two of you are only in each other’s orbit, seeing each other from a distance. The closest that you’ll ever get is being a few seats away in biology class. However, even though you only share one class with him, you know him all too well.

Childe is the infamous sporty kid in school. He’s also one who often wins academic competitions for the school. The student body doesn’t necessarily dislike him either. In fact, the girls adore him. They think that he’s hot and charming. But outside of his friend group, everyone is mostly too intimidated by his aura to approach him. 

You can also always count on Childe to constantly talk back to teachers and staff. Now and then, you would catch him breaking school rules by exploiting their loopholes. The school hasn’t expelled him, given that he’s not causing harm or trouble to anyone. On top of that, he largely excels in many areas. Though… There are rumours of him beating other students up. But no one has actually seen him do so.

You, on the other hand, keep to your group of friends. That’s how you decided you were going to spend the rest of your school life. Comfortable with a group of friends that you cherish deeply, out of the spotlight. 

That is until Childe decides to collide into your world for a reason you cannot bring yourself to turn down. Okay, you could have, but you don't dare to.

As a short breather from studying in the library, you doodle a little. Childe walks up to your side while you’re doing so. 

With a volume lower than usual, he greets you. “Hey, [name]- Oh these look pretty cute.”

You dropped your pencil on your notebook, taken aback that the Childe is talking to you. 

“What’s up, Childe?” you ask as your hand subtly shifts above the doodles in your notebook. Honestly, you want nothing to do with him. But, at the same time, you are courteous enough not to shut someone out the first time they speak to you.

He smiles sheepishly as he requests, “Sorry to bother you, but could you give me a demonstration on the dissection of a sheep’s brain?”

You only blink at him in response. You asked him to repeat, making sure you didn’t mishear him. Assuming you couldn’t hear him, he raises his volume. Only slightly, so as not to disturb other students. 

“I need some help on dissecting a sheep’s brain and I’d like you to show me a demonstration. Would that be okay for you?”

Fumbling over your words a little, you agree to help him with his dissection. “Great! Thank you so much, [name]. Will tomorrow after our biology lesson be good?”

“Yeah, sure…”

With that, he walks off with a slight skip in his steps. But you, on the other hand, are highly preoccupied with your thoughts. You think you got a little too nervous around him. They say you shouldn’t show fear in front of what you are afraid of. Wait, since when were you afraid of him?

On top of that worry, you aren’t sure if you should be proud that Childe thinks highly enough of you to ask you for help, or if you should be concerned that you are now responsible for tutoring the infamous school delinquent instead. 

Do you really know the dissection like the back of your hand? What if he asks you about the details that you've thrown to the back of your mind? As an extra precaution, you start to relook at your notes on the dissection. Before you sleep at night, you give your notes one last read too.

The next day, you realise during lessons that you forgot to check if there was a supervising teacher present after school. For students to use the laboratory after school, there is a rule stating that a teacher has to be present. Childe probably wouldn’t heed that rule in normal circumstances. But since your last lesson is Biology in the laboratory with him, your teacher would definitely know both of you are staying back. If there was no one around, your teacher wouldn’t permit you two to use the room and kick the both of you out. 

So, you pray. You pray that there wouldn’t be any supervising teacher, so you’d get to slip out on Childe. But unfortunately, when class ends, you find out that your teacher is on duty today.

Sighing internally, you resign yourself to helping Childe. As you prepare your workbench, you catch your teacher's eyes darting between the two of you. Likely surprised that both of you speak to each other, you suppose. You'd be surprised too.

When all the preparation is done, you try to hide your disappointment and ask, “So, how do you want me to teach this to you?” 

“You can do a step-by-step demonstration, then I’ll try to follow along.”

After every step, you check on the steps that he executes. While doing so, you notice how slender his hands are and the little faded scars on them. 

“[Name]? We can continue.”

You snap out of your daze and mutter an apology, continuing the dissection. At some point, you stop him. “Hold on, you’re about to cut the wrong part.”

He shifts his gaze over to your scalpel, trying to assess the exact point to cut. Before he does anything, you move over to his side as you always do when you teach your friends. You wrap your hand around his that holds the scalpel and you guide his hand.

Childe becomes momentarily distracted by your touch on his. He tries to ignore the feeling of his skin tingling and regain his focus. 

(But it is for nought because all he can think of is how cool you are for being so good at Biology. Heck, not just Biology, but other subjects too. Words of your consistently stellar grades don’t escape him.)

You only realise the proximity between the two of you after you let go of his hand. Taking a step back, your leg bumps into the stool. You stumble for a bit. Childe’s hand reaches out to your arm and it hovers right above your skin, ready to catch you. But you don’t fall and a few moments pass.

Inside, you beat yourself up a little for almost falling onto the ground in front of someone you’ve barely spoken to before. You straighten yourself and Childe withdraws his hand back to his side. 

You clear your throat in an attempt to dissipate the tension in the air. “There’s only one more step left to go. I can show that to you and if you’re good, we can pack up.”

You note how hot your face feels and hope he doesn’t tell this to his friend circle. You don’t particularly like them, given the amount of drama they attract. 

You try to concentrate, though the incident earlier remains at the front of your mind. Soon, he ends the procedure without a hitch, so you assume that you’ve taught him the right step despite your lack of focus. With that, both of you clean up the workbench. 

Childe finishes cleaning up faster than you. He always packs up quickly after class, and you chalk up his speed to his desire to leave class early. You think he’s about to leave when he comes over to help you. When he does, he thanks you.

“Thanks for the tutoring session, [name].”

A few seconds of silence lapse. You’re not sure if you should thank him for helping you. But before you say anything, he asks, “Say… could I ask you for more help next time? I struggle quite a bit with Biology.”

Immediately, you nod. It'll just be more tutoring sessions that'll benefit you too. Though, you ask, “Don’t you have friends who do Biology?”

Childe’s face sours a little, a smile still plastered on his face. He whispers, “Let’s just say that while I do hang out with them, I don’t like to stay around them more than I need to.”

Your eyes widen slightly. The two of you have more in common than you thought.

As the two of you walk down the hallways to the exit, he exchanges contacts with you. Childe does a tiny fist pump in the air. “Nice! Now, we can easily arrange study sessions!”

He turns to look at you and offers, “If you need anything too, you can always ask me!”

Childe flashes you a smile. He’s really not so bad.

When the two of you part ways at the school gate, you wave to him. He returns one with that annoyingly vibrant smile of his. But, maybe you could get used to this.

Only then do you realise, oh, you are in so much danger. The moon is reaching its orbit closest to the sun now.

--

All likes and reblogs are appreciated! Thank you <3

[mimimariet]

Posting this here cause twitter limit and whoever cares to read or relate lol-:

I don't know how to properly convey my feelings with this rant. My best friend told me I'm sure other creatives could relate. The short story is I've lost my hyperfixation that keeps me alive. I'm so emotionally and physically fatigued and arts been hard. In 2010 I dabbled with my OCs, and later on down the road it became my lifeline. I had invested such a huge part of me into my characters and building their world and stories. However, there came this period.. currently.. that I'm struggling to overcome.

A little background, my OCs were definitely an outlet for me. I had been in several relationships where I felt like I needed to beg for love. I thought I had found someone who truly loved me! Heartbreak can write some amazing stories and songs. Though for my mental wellbeing.. being in a toxic and abusive relationship has only left me damaged. Somehow it has taken my creativity away.. I have these experiences I can work and work thru on a personal level AND an artistic level but..

I'm now in a relatively healthy relationship. We both have our struggles but I'm at this point where I'm.. content with the feeling of "loved". I've lost the mourning connection of my OCs and their stories cause I'm content and at peace. I'm still forever damaged and even with the 10 months that have passed by.. I'm not fully recovered. I still strongly desire to work on my stories. I don't know when that'll be.. with a job I'm fed up with and with a heart in recovery.. I just don't know. Simply put, I am stuck. I miss my youth and energy to create. I hope it gets better for me soon.

I have no idea if this even makes sense! I'm trying to explain how.. there was the me back then, who was used and abused and all stretched thin with such a DRIVE to use those emotions to put into a story to tell.. the manic late night episodes of me making comics.. using heartbreak to fuel a story with my dumb little OCs. I used the hurt to make something happy, to live out my desires into my little personalities that are mostly named Billy. Now I'm content.. with love.. Not so much my job I'm TRYING to find a new one LMAO. It's been so difficult. I'm trying to find a new peace, I know I mention Kesha A LOT and shes a huge part of my life, too. "Too Far Gone" from her album Gag Order fits the vibe. "Am I missing you, or am I missing pieces of me?" I guess another word to describe me is optimistic and I always try to look on the bright side of things. Considering "if I can't be happy I can make my little guys happy! But they will be angsty along the way of course!" I'm severely stumped.. I've written so much for my comics and I'm just.. oddly art blocked and overwhelmed into creation. That and my job is whats KILLING my creative mojo. Sorry y'all. <3 I'll get there. I miss drawing so much. My current "fixation" at least.. is Kesha. So I can still create something..!! She's kinda taken the place of my OCs lmao. My brain should be studied, I dunno!! I'm not going anywhere so no need to be worried about that. :B I'm on.. an artistic life support, is all.