#i've been doing it all my life so i guess it's just second nature

[jellicatty]

♯1 ┆ ❝ SUMMER BUMMER ❞ 𝜗𝜚 ᵎᵎ

With your teases and flirty remarks, the two men find themselves guessing the color of your panties— another game they played besides golfing.

╰┈➤ contains : nanami x beverage cart attendant! female reader x higuruma. nana and higu golfing. masturbation. grinding. mutual pinning. innuendos. nana and higu are perverts here. jealous! higuruma. reader is a tease. reader wear skirts.

╰┈➤ note : EEEE FINALLY I POSTED THIS it only took me like a months... anywayy, sex scenes aren't really my forte plus this is like the first time i wrote one sooo don't expect too much (?).

╰┈➤ next : groupie love (coming soon) ...

Defendants would put all the blame on him, the court's verdict is seemingly destined to oppose his favor. Or, that's what Higuruma thought. Another failed case, another living being failed by the country's unjust system, another alleged victim thrown into jail.

Higuruma though, knew that these circumstances would happen. His dream have lasted for centuries, formed by his compassion to deliver the accused to light. But little by little, his principles have formed cracks.

Although his workaholic nature is unfaltering, worsened by the multitude of paperworks, Higuruma does crave for rest. But, his work-life balance contradicts his need for relaxation. Until, the opportunity had arrived and he's now trudging to a bar.

To passerby, it was your typical, vintage bar that old and worn-out folks like him would visit. However, Higuruma saw it as a sanctuary for his deep troubles. From drinking with his colleagues or just simply letting his usually work-occupied mind slip away, his favorite bar had seen it all.

"One— No, three of these, please." His ever polite tone still there even as the hours of long work shouldered him down.

The atmosphere rivaled the comfort of his home, and it's probably why Higuruma had an liking for it.

"You're being carried away by your thoughts, Mr. Higuruma." The bartender was quick to notice his blank expression, placing his ordered drinks in an attempt to distract his mind from work.

But, the bartender knew Higuruma too well. Despite connecting only through brief conversations, and a short time together, the bartender had a sense of what Higuruma's state of mind is at the end of the day.

"If you want to take off your mind away from work, then I suggest doing something else for a change." Well, this hasn't been the first time the advice was given to the attorney. He's had his fair share of therapeutic tips from concerned people. None were able to fully convince him though.

"I don't... I'm too busy."

"You wallow in self-pity, yet do nothing to save yourself from it. I've met other people like you, people who find comfort in what makes them distraught." Instead of his duties, the bartender was now focused on Higuruma. "It doesn't end good for them. I'm sure you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I know. It's not that easy to let go of something that you've dedicated your whole life too."

"I'm sure nothing will be lost if you do let go for a fraction of a second."

"You're not going to give this up, huh?" Higuruma sighed, "Well, I'd like to keep a valuable customer." They both chuckled at the Bartender's wishes. After some thought and a drink or two, Higuruma was set on the decision to make some small changes in his life for once.

The problem is, what would be the change?

Gym was out of the question since he frequently did so. Hiking's too taxing and he can't leave his duties for a long time. Sports were a possibility, as long as it didn't physically exert him that much. Golfing, maybe? He thought.

"One of the gents at the bar earlier has been to the newly opened golfing course here."

Ah, golfing it is.

"I think that young fellow over there needs a getaway from their life, too." His focus turned to the younger, blond man sitting three stools away. A few bottles have been emptied, yet it was evident that he could go for a few more. Nothing outstanding from the man aside from his leopard-pattern tie. Just your typical, fatigue worker.

"Looks like you're also preoccupied with your mind, Sir Nanami. I take it as a bad day?"

"No need to say more."

Although Higuruma knew it was not the best to disturb the tired man, he thought that perhaps talking to him would make their mundane nights better. Maybe, to comfort him with the words he wished to hear.

"Sorry for intruding your conversation, but are you new here?"

"Nope. Been here for some time now. Just been a bit busy with some... grueling reports again." He winced at the mention of his work.

"Reports?"

"I'm a salaryman." Higuruma now turned his full attention on Nanami, filling his curiosity. He hands out a calling card, "Here, just in case." And for a brief second, Higuruma almost laughs at his own 'joke' that he always did with his new acquaintances. Fortunately for him, Nanami's humor was not yet stripped away by his boring profession and softly smiled at his friendly remark.

It's a simple change like this is what Nanami wanted. Nothing extraordinary, nothing too small to notice too. The two men shared their experiences, silently bonding over the heavy troubles they carried from day to night. And if they were being honest, this was one of those moments where they surely won't forget. It's like moments like this was there only escape from the tiring duties they must do.

Alas, the deepest night has caught up to them. The lulling blue tones that played throughout their visit no longer graced their ears. The only noise present was their chatter and the kind bartender's huffing and puffing of cigarette.

"You know, despite your gruff look, you're an approachable guy. A fun one too if you squinted."

"Oh, gruff? You should check a mirror, Higuruma."

The two men chuckled at their jokes, slowly packing up their own belongings before cleaning their surroundings. After they finished, they walked together outside.

The blistering cold of the night quickly breezed past the two men. A shiver and a small breath of fresh air later, they nodded at each other and departed from the bar with heavy steps.

The night was still young, and Higuruma's desperate for a change. Fortunately, Nanami Kento had arrived. Albeit small, Nanami still had made a difference to Higuruma's perpetual enervating days.

He doesn't want their interactions to remain just at the bar, though. Perhaps, he should suggest on golfing together to help the blond too.

The summertime heat was merciless. As one could anticipate for this time of year. In the intense heat, Higuruma and Nanami were helpless. Their experienced selves took turns swinging their golf clubs, finding entertainment in their calculated swings and triumphant shots. Empty cups scattered on their table, their belongings left unattended. 

Golf seemed like a good start—and maybe their greatest choice by far. It was not only a nice diversion, but it also provided them with the ideal reason to spend time with their favorite entertainment—you, the beverage cart girl. 

Weeks have passed, and life has been more tolerable. The first golf meets with Nanami were riddled with a comfortable silence, as if the two men had known each other for a while. The only bond they had was formed on their sleepless nights and persistent work, yet conversations flowed effortlessly. With their unfading politeness and formal talking that stayed even during their golf meets. They both assumed that the other was righteous, and a man of good qualities. Damn were they wrong.

Refined. Upright. Gentlemanly. Those words that used to describe the two men were long discarded. Since your arrival, the two men had been nothing but good, their true colors spilling from the shells of who they used to be. Higuruma could still vividly recall the moment where their true selves slipped. Their gazes were fixed only on you that day, overfilled with joy once you asked for their orders in that sweet voice you had. And right after you left them with their hard rock problems to themselves, they turned to each other as if their eyes alone could communicate. A word did not need to be shared. They knew that you were going to be a problem.

"What do you think's the color of her panties this time, Nanami?" Higuruma positioned his hips in a more appropriate manner, then swung his club. 

"That cheeky woman loves pink," Nanami replied. 

Aside from golf, they engaged in another game — guessing the color of your panties. As suggested by Higuruma when he caught a glimpse of it a few days ago, this was now the two men's favorite pastime. To them, it seemed only fair since you'd purposely bend over to shamelessly give them a view of your lace-trimmed panties that matched your outfits.

"I highly doubt it will be pink again—" 

Out of nowhere, the faint noise of tires screeching slowly approached the two men. Puzzled, they looked at each other first, before turning around. Their eyes confusedly searched for the noise, before their gazes landed on the approaching golf cart— or rather, you. 

It was as if you were the oasis in the Sahara desert, quenching the men's thirst with your exposed skin and alluring smile. With your pastel yellow pleats that went inches above your knee, your tight-fit Lululemon jacket that hugged your delectable figure, and your glamoured face, you joyfully steered the cart towards them. 

Your beautiful smile greeted them, "Sir Kento! Sir Hiromi! I've brought you your drinks again!"  

Higuruma's typically vacant eyes had their spark back to them, the usual boring look it wore instantly disappearing. Meanwhile, the hard lines of Nanami’s face eased, his stoic demeanor softening in your presence.

You hopped off your seat and prepared their ordered drinks, blind to their improper gazes that seek your undergarment. 

Luck was merciful, and the world was on their side today when a breeze had swept your skirt upwards in a cartoonish fashion. 

"Oh!" Your cheeks flushed scarlet at the embarrassing incident, yet your hands take their time to pull down your skirt. 

Their eyes are quicker than your hands, ill-intent gazes finding your undergarment in a flash. Light pink and polka dotted, adorned with a small bow at the front. The kind of panties that he envisioned every night. Nanami snickered, proving himself to be right once again.

"Pay up," Higuruma grumbled, cursing the man under his breath. Their actions no longer define the men they used to be. Their gentlemanliness and polished attitudes dissipate into the air at the sight of you. 

"Thanks, angel. You know how to make our day better, huh?" Nanami returned your smile and took the drinks from your hand. 

Higuruma is not oblivious enough to overlook Nanami's full interest in you. He's sure that a deprived man like him would ogle at your frame. He applauded the blond's self-control because, God, mini skirts were the death of him. 

"That would beeee... 12 dollars!" 

"12 only?" Higuruma pulled out his wallet and handed more than the said amount, "Here, keep the change, sweetie." However, your hands clumsily dropped the money. 

Your breasts from the tight-fit jacket were threatening to spill out as you bent down to grab the fallen change. Although involuntarily, the two men were able to shortly glance at it and oh, my— what a sight. Two mounds pressed tightly together, sweat sensually gliding on your skin, the natural red flush adding more allure. 

Their throats ran dry, needing a refreshment as they were taken aback by the promiscuous view of your tits. There's no way that wasn't intentional, they thought.  

Although you often pulled those stunts, your shyness still lingered— a thing that they grew fondness for. You excused your blunder, timidly covering your face as you walked back to your cart. 

"Aw, you going so soon?" You knew Higuruma would call for you. After all, he enjoyed your presence and often was the one chatting with you. From his smirk though, you should have known he had something in store for today. 

"Come, let Mr. Kento here teach you some golf lessons." Higuruma's true goal of making you break in broad daylight is hidden under his hoax suggestion. Nanami, with his sharp senses, saw Higuruma's real intention, irritated at being his guinea pig for entertainment. 

Despite his annoyance, he gratifies the other man's idea. Now, he has an inexcusable reason to close the proximity between you. 

You asked the man in your honeyed voice "Would it be okay, Sir Kento?", so sweet it's almost sickly. His ears are focused on your saccharine voice, contradicting his jumbled thoughts that insisted he was sick of hearing it, fearing how much power your words have over him. His mind wonders; Would you have that same, sugary and sweet voice? Would your moans echo like candy, alluring and irresistible?

Nanami's attention was quickly drawn to you, looking up at him, his bulging biceps pressed against your tits. Your big, doll-like eyes are desperate to be taught. Nanami wonders again if you'd have the same look when he'll be ruining you.

"Pleaaseee! My shift will be finished soon!" Your pout was his last straw, a victim to your begging once again. Sighing, Nanami agreed to your requests. 

"Yay! Thank you, Sir Kento!" 

"Calm down, sweets. Mr. Kento here is going to malfunction if you keep on clinging to him like that." Higuruma snickered at Nanami's flustered face. "Oh, I apologize, Sir Kento!" You sheepishly backed away and regretted your actions. 

The truth is, it wasn't just the two men that had their perverse fantasies. You too suffered their charm. Whether it be downing the alcohol they ordered, or simply breathing, it always had been a distraction for you. Their Ralph Lauren polos hugged their bodies in a nice fit, outlining their flexed muscles that shone deliciously under their sweat and the sun's rays. Thick, defined thighs, straining their pants. Even when playing normally, their wealth and professionalism exuded, something that you found very appealing. 

"Bend with your hips, Y/n. Not your waist." Would it be wrong to say that you found his strict demeanor attractive? Would it also be wrong to think of the many things Nanami would order you to do in bed? 

"Aaand— Did I do it right?!" Nanami's advice went through and exited your ear. Your swings misaligned and your ball never reached the goal. 

"Gosh, you're a lost cause, angel. This is how it's done." Without warning, Nanami walked to your back. His proximity was sinful as his crotch settled at your ass, the sudden closeness eliciting a small, shocked gasp from you. 

"Like..." He's also affected by the warmth and comfort your ass gave, hot breath fanning over your neck. He extended his arm and put them over yours, guiding your own so you can swing in a correct manner. "This."

But, aiming for the goal was the least of your worries. Not when Nanami's cock is noticeably hardening against your ass. 

"There, you did it!" 

A mix of disbelief and amusement flickered on Higuruma's face. Regret washed over him as Nanami took his suggestion to another level, scolding himself for underestimating the blond's courage and will to tease you right in front of him. With no escape, he's now forced to watch the consequences of his actions unfold. Yet, despite the pure jealousy clouding his mind, he does admit that the scene was enticing. 

His thoughts are improper and vulgar, your flushed expression fueling him more. His train of thought is unavoidable though. Whenever Nanami teased you in broad daylight, publicly, and in front of him, his thoughts will surely be anything but pure.

"S-Sir Hiromi—!" Your voice cried, not for help but for his attention. A whore like you loved the attention. You loved Higuruma's disgusted scowl as he watched the two of you get handsy. You loved Higuruma's body, which reacted opposed to his shown expressions— his bulge visible while his face grimaced. 

But, his thoughts got the best of him, and you only wanted to share your achievement. 

"Did you s-see my shot? It was perfect!" You finally let out a breath when Nanami pulled away, not without a small, teasing comment whispered at you. 

Let him watch. 

Oh, you will. 

Another time, though, because Higuruma's jealousy was painfully cutting through the air. His patience was wearily thin, and it's all because you cannot stop grinding on Nanami's bulge. 

Determined to outdo the blond's ministrations, and also ease his jealousy, Higuruma chimes in., "You mind for a dinner together? Could tell that you need a break just from your eyes alone, sweets." 

The sudden attention left you light-headed, shocked with their unspoken rivalry. You had power and influence over them, and you know just how to use it. But for now, your mind could only focus on the fact that you were going to dinner with your client. You’ve overstepped so many rules and most probably going to be in trouble, but a night with a man like Higuruma Hiromi was something you won’t deny.

Nanami sees your excitement. Feeling the sprouted competition happening between him and his friend, he quickly interjects, "I still don't have your number either. What is it, angel?"

Higuruma's betting on all of his suits (which are all expensive, by the way) that Nanami's going to fuck his fist to your pictures tonight. And he wasn't wrong. Because, as soon as Nanami arrived home, his first thought was to check your socials (surprisingly, not his paperwork). He was initially confused since you had an innocent facade online. Shared religious quotes, pictures with family, not a single photo where your boobs are out for everyone to see. He's even doubting if he followed the correct account. The only confirmation he had that it was yours was the new story you had posted. 

It was you, right after your shift, posing in front of the mirror with a smile. Your caption about thanking the Lord for another day made him laugh. He's confident that you're praising Nanami for his ministrations earlier instead. 

Nanami also wholeheartedly believes you're thanking him too for pressing his hard cock on your ass. He's flattered, and fucking horny, still bothered by the stunt he pulled earlier. 

His erection is painful, and Nanami realizes how he could take care of it. Although feeling a bit perverse at the act he's about to do, he shoves his second thoughts away, eager to cum at a picture of you. 

His lengthy dick is in his hand, gliding against his tip, then sliding up and down. His pre cum coated the top, oozing continuously as he stared at your picture on screen.

"Fuuuck..." He groaned, eyes closed, panting at the pleasure he was feeling. He indulges in his fantasies, letting his imagination run wild. He thinks of you inside his bedroom, wearing nothing but your light pink underwear, with polka dots all over and decorated with laces and ribbons. The same panties that he caught a glimpse of that he's so weak for. He's curious about what you'd be like, but he knew your salacious nature, and figured that you'll be the same slut you are. 

God, if only you were here.

If you were here, it wouldn't be him toying with himself. It would be you, bouncing up and down, drool dripping from your mouth, as his cock fucks your pussy silly. You'd have that dumb look on your face, mind clouded in a lust-frenzy haze as you desperately begged for more. 

"Mhm! Sir Kento!" He knows you'd call out to him, your voice ever-so-sweet, whining and weeping at the fervent feeling of him filling you up. 

"Gonna cum inside you." is what he'd say if you were here. And you being you, you're fain of his request, straddling his hips as if it was made to be there. You wouldn't pull away. Instead, you'd remain on his dick as splurges of cum shoot out of it. 

"T-thank you, Sir" You'd thank him for drowning your sex with his cum. Nanami would only get hard again at your sweetness that managed to stay in the bedroom, and he'd flip you over and pound himself into you. 

His empty promises to himself would be fulfilled one day. But for now, his hand will do. 

"S-shit" His voice is shaky, body trembling at his intense high. His palm is dirtied by his cum that he hoped was inside of you instead.

Tonight, it will be his hand. Next week, it will be your mouth. He's certain of that— No, he swears it will be your small mouth wrapped on his cock. Perhaps, with Higuruma fucking you silly too.

tags : @packsvlog @honeynanamin @rrssrios @misscigarettes @shokosbunny @shamelessdonutkryptonite @i1uvc4ke @dongh9e @freakadelik @tomurafrlover23 @sad-darksoul @glader13 @that-redheadd @beantokki @a-hidden-gem @joonsanswers @erenspersonalsexdoll @s-1-xx @shxniq @ilovetengen @zianaz-slvtz @jwnzlvr @wifenanami @20kglex @oromaangel @jejejjekskwl @s4m4nth4wrld @jaeminsmilk @alpha-mommy69 @lobsteeer @blackphoenix0718 @wrldldo @nappingmoon @cindyneko-strider @yumiecheesecrackers @rattats-world

© jellicatty | no plagiarising please (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ*.ﾟ

[mmogurl]

Last to Fall Chapter 1 - My Demons

18+ | 10k | Aegon II Targaryen X Female Maid / Dragonseed Reader | miserable, alcoholic, often dissociative, needs comfort Aegon | virgin reader, maiden, emotional abuse, first time sex, P in V, smut, wholesome, fluff, this whole thing is actually kind of sweet compared to what I usually write.

This fic is heavily inspired by the infamous 'Nothing' scene with Aegon and Alicent. Her cold words and the way she lashes out really bothered me and I felt a strong need to stand up for him, protect, and console him. So that's really what this whole fic is about. Enjoy! Also went with a lot of musical vibing for this story. I started off listening to Collective Soul's Heavy, because I imagine it as Aegon's state of mind in the opening scene towards everyone and everything happening. And by the end we transition into Starset's Last to Fall - and the title of the fic. I know, I'm a sappy mf.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 On AO3

Retroactive update 10/29/24: I've also decided that I'm going to try my best to fit every chapter to a Starset song because the whole Series is based off the title of one (Last to Fall) which was originally going to be a oneshot and got extended. I'm enjoying the challenge of finding one that suits each theme/ story! They're not all going to be perfectly aligned, but I'll try my best. This one is Starset - My Demons adding onto the two songs I already referenced here - but this one just felt so perfect!

Complicate this world you wrapped for me I'm acquainted with your suffering

All your weight it falls on me It brings me down All your weight it falls on me It falls on me

~Collective Soul - Heavy

—You

You have worked in the castle for as long as you can remember, always hearing the whisperings of the chamberlain, the laundress, and any other keep staff prone to gossip, that you were the late king’s bastard. There were always underhanded comments of jealousy uttered in your direction, like ‘It must be nice to have a king’s blood runnin’ through yer veins... To have yer needs met for life.’ In truth, you were worried that the Queen Dowager might see fit to dispose of you now that her husband had passed.

So far, it seems your fair looks, expertise, and agreeable demeanor has secured your position, at least for the time being, but you are not so naive as to think that will last forever.

You tended to King Viserys for six summers, and with his death you’ve been reassigned to serve the new Protector of the Realm, Aegon II Targaryen. You are mildly concerned about this development considering the rumors you’ve heard about the young prince over the years. Drinking and philandering to excess, he was rumored to be a true hedonist, only taking satisfaction when drowning himself in pleasure. It is for this very reason, that you’re surprised by your observations of your new lord within the first weeks of your employ as his chambermaid and general attendant.

You find he spends a lot of time sitting in near darkness with barely a couple candles lit in his room at night, kept company only by a carafe of wine and wearing a disassociated look on his face that could be taken for misery if it didn’t appear so apathetic in nature. It was as though he were actively trying to force himself into a mold that he would never fit into. This became even more apparent as you witnessed more of his interactions with his family, especially his mother and grand-sire. It seemed they were constantly trying to orchestrate the ruling of the Seven Kingdoms, nitpicking at every little decision Aegon made, pulling his strings just like a puppet.

You had listened from the sidelines of the Great Hall as the Hand second-guessed the king’s rulings. Even when the Aegon tried to embrace his seat upon the Iron Throne, he was made impotent by those not fit to govern. You could do nothing but stand by helplessly in saddened silence when he suffered the loss of his eldest son to assassins, while Otto Hightower forced him to parade young Jaehaerys’ corpse to the public along with his grief-stricken sister-wife, Helaena.

Day by day, your heart was beginning to ache for the emptiness you saw growing behind his amethyst eyes. And yet still he tried on most days to put a positive foot forward, even if by nightfall he usually turned back to engulfing his sorrows in drink. You couldn’t even blame him really given the complete lack of moral and emotional support the king had to endure.

This feeling of compassion built within you, until one day it peaked to a head as you made your way to Aegon’s chambers with fresh linens in hand, ready to fulfill your afternoon chores. You passed several Kingsguard as you made your way down the hall and paused outside the king’s rooms as you heard voices coming from within. The two white cloaks standing watch at the open threshold glanced at you in warning, so you simply waited with folded bedsheets in hand for the opportunity to complete your duties.

You knew you should not listen, but it was hard to ignore the distressed voice of the king from within, met by the indifferent attitude of the Queen Dowager. Oh no, you think to yourself sympathetically, she is at it again. It really did seem that tearing Aegon down piece by piece was not only a habit for his mother, but something she relished in.

“Do you think simply wearing the crown imbues you with wisdom,” Alicent’s voice echoed out against the vaulted ceiling of the room, her voice patronizing and condescending. “Those men at your council table earned their seats. It was my hope that once enthroned you would honor the burden of your new duties, be silent, and strive to learn from the more studied minds around you. In the hope that you might be half the king your father was…”

You tried to swallow the lump forming in your throat at hearing such baleful words. The king was not responding, and you could just imagine the pained look of agony that Aegon was sure to be wearing under the constant criticisms he faced as of late.

“Tread carefully,” you heard him say, barely carrying enough volume to hear from where you stood. You found yourself holding back a smile at that, happy that he was standing up to her for once. But, that only incensed the Queen Dowager more, her thirst to harm not yet quenched.

“Or what?” she says with venom coating her tongue. “You’ll hang me, as you did your rat catchers? Or have me banished as you did your Hand? I ruled in your father’s absence throughout his long illness, and Otto Hightower was as cunning a statesman as ever lived. You should humbly be seeking our opinions and counsel. You have no idea the sacrifices that were made to put you on that throne.”

You shook your head, unsure how any mother could ever speak to her child in such a manner, let alone to the Lord of the Seven Kingdoms. Perhaps it bothered you so because you had never known the tenderness of a mother’s love, but had spent many a daydream imagining what it might be like. With your idealistic and sometimes naive mind, you wanted to think that there was more love out there in the world than this, especially within the royal family. You wanted better for the young king you had grown to feel so protective of in such a short amount of time.

Aegon’s next words break your train of thought, “Wha-“ he started with an exasperated tone, “What would you have me do, Mother?”

“Do simply what is needed of you,” she replied and the frosty chill of her cold voice was evident even from the corridor. “Nothing.”

You feel tears well up in the corners of your eyes and try your best to ignore them. It was important as part of the castle staff to never appear to be listening, to always remain professional, but it wasn’t always possible when one was witness to such cruelty.

Quickly, you wipe the errant tears away as the Queen Dowager exits her son’s apartment, walking swiftly with a scowl on her face. With the king now alone in his chambers, you nod to the guards and head inside, pausing to close the doors behind you lest Aegon had wont of some privacy.

As you turned to face the room, the king sat off to the side of his table, leaning against the back of a chair, his head resting upon his hands in defeat. He did not stir as you entered and so you cleared your throat to let yourself be known. Aegon still made no move and so this time you spoke up.

“Your Grace, might I change the linens? Or should I come back later?” you ask, your voice hesitant, but filled with understanding.

He finally lifts his head, glancing at you for a moment before returning his attention to the nearly empty decanter of wine on the table.

“Fetch me some more wine instead,” he demands sullenly, and to this you nod and hurry off to fulfill his request. After what you’d heard him endure, you’d do just about anything to cheer him up now.

With a speed you did not think yourself capable, you retrieved, not just one, but two pitchers of strongwine for the king and prepared a small platter of snacks for him as well, consisting of cheese, crackers, figs, and grapes. You hoped he’d be pleased with your thoughtfulness, and sure enough, he did perk up a little at the sight of the tray you presented on the table before him.

Aegon got to his feet, walking around the chair he’d been leaning against and sitting in it instead. You filled his chalice and placed it before him, wearing an exaggerated smile upon your face, anything to lighten the onerous mood. The king surprises you when he actually notices, his composure faltering as he looks upon your benevolent countenance.

“Did you hear all of that then?” he asks, his jaw clenching slightly as he peers down at the crimson fluid within the cup before him.

“It is not my business, Your Grace,” you answer softly, not wanting to sound cold, but knowing it is not your place to comment on such things. “But, if I can do anything, or get anything more for you. Please just ask.”

“I never wanted to be be king, you know,” Aegon says abruptly, picking up the chalice and swirling the wine around inside it. “They hunted me down, forced me to be crowned… And yet, Mother tells me I do not deserve it, even though she has placed me upon the throne herself.”

You flounder with your words, uncertain of how to reply. Should you even say anything at all? Perhaps he just wants someone to listen who won’t respond with a scathing rebuke.

“She spoke of the rat catchers, bringing up the death of my eldest son as though it were nothing to me,” he continues without your input, staring into the contents of his chalice as though it might hold some insight. “She treats me as though I am nothing.”

He finally takes a long swig of the cup, emptying most of it in one gulp. Aegon sets it down on the table with a clatter of metal and wood, an almost despondent look on his face as he adds, “Perhaps I am nothing.”

“Your Grace, no! That is not true!” the words slip out, unable to hold back your feelings at his self-denigration. You immediately cover your mouth with startled surprise, knowing that you’ve overstepped.

Aegon halts, his shoulders tensing as his eyes drift up to you and his brow furls downwards in confusion. He regards you in earnest for what feels like the first time ever, his discerning gaze sweeping from your face, down to your skirts and back up again, sizing you up. “What would you know of it?”

You bite your lip anxiously, unsure of how to proceed, even though it seems by now that you’ve already gone past the point of returning to obscurity. Ultimately, you decide that if you’re going to lose your position within the Red Keep, that you’d prefer to let the king know how you feel first.

“I have seen how determined you are,” you say quietly, a lack of confidence in your voice as you address the king. “Even though it is obvious how much hardship you must abide.”

“I am the king. I do not abide anything,” he replies gruffly, but there’s no tooth in the words.

“Of course, Your Grace,” you reply as you cast your eyes downward, your posture stiffening as you stand more upright, waiting for the hammer of discipline to fall.

There is a pervasive silence that hangs heavy in the expansive chamber as you wait for the king to cast his verdict. Does he intend to overlook your impertinence or will he punish you severely?

You hear the trickle of liquid pouring and then the glass carafe clattering against the wood of the table. The sound of swallowing is audible, followed by Aegon’s lips smacking softly as he puts the chalice back down.

“Come here, girl,” he says suddenly in a low monotone.

You look up once more, hesitating; your eyes questioning as you try to understand his intentions, his expression inscrutable.

“Do I have to repeat myself?” he reiterates, his tone a little more firm, yet without the sound of malicious intent. “Come here.”

You gulp and step gingerly towards Aegon, standing before him as he sits in the high-back chair. “Yes, Your Grace?” you ask with an uncertain look on your face.

The king startles you when he turns his chair to face you, his hands wrapping around your waist as he pulls you towards him in one fluid motion. Before you even realize what is happening, Aegon has his face buried against your stomach while his fingers dig into the fabric of your dress at the small of your back.

For a moment you stand there frozen in shock, your arms out as if in surrender, unsure of how to respond or interpret this intimate gesture. But then, you feel his shoulders shake quietly, and it's that movement that clues you in to the nature of the king's actions. He is crying, albeit in his own restrained way.

Slowly, you lower your hands down, one resting on his back as the other smooths his white locks back against his scalp. You can feel him melt into your affectionate touch, his entire body slumping forward even as he continues to whimper quietly into your apron.

“Shh,” you say softly, trying to comfort him in a way that feels somehow natural to you despite the gap in caste. “It will be alright.” You are not fully convinced that it will be, but the young king needs some reassurance and you know you are the only one likely to give it to him.

You have secretly longed for a moment such as this to occur for awhile now, wishing you had the opportunity to provide the king with some semblance of reprieve. When you served Viserys, he never seemed very troubled, and was almost willfully ignorant to the problems that plagued his family. Aegon on the other hand, was tormented not only by his mother, but by the pressure he put on himself to please everyone, which was an impossible feat.

To soothe Aegon now and hold him in your arms, felt like putting one of the many wrongs he’d endured right, even if it was only a small fraction of what the man was owed.

Your fingers rake through his wavy tresses and you feel a surge of raw emotion as you tend to the king’s needs in a way you never imagined you would. Soon, his shaky breaths and silent tears begin to cease, replaced by sniffles as you continue to soothe him in the way his mother should have been for all of these years. You can sense his reluctance to leave your embrace, but there’s also a shame weighing heavy in the air for confiding such weakness in a simple chambermaid.

He nuzzles his eyes against the fabric of your dress, wiping his tears on the brown cloth before he abruptly pulls away and clears his throat. Aegon avoids looking directly at you, embarrassment evident in his now red and puffy eyes. He lets out a heavy sigh and you’re left feeling quite dumbfounded as he turns back to his wine.

For a long moment there is a tense and overwhelming silence, the only sounds present in the room are the soft pouring of wine into Aegon’s chalice and the glass clinking as he sets the carafe down.

You stare at the side of his face, feeling a knot form in your stomach at the growing distance. It’s as if he’s punishing you for witnessing his vulnerability, desperate to maintain the barrier between king and servant. Despite his aversion, you can’t help but feel the significance of what you shared, the way he pulled you in and how good it felt to hold him close.

The quiet stretches on, Aegon now occupied with emptying his cup as if trying to fill the void with drink. He speaks up once more, his tone now devoid of any traces of the exposed emotion you just viewed.

"That will be all," his words are devoid of any warmth or familiarity. "I don't need anything more from you tonight." Aegon’s fingers tremble subtly as he brings his glass to his lips, betraying his cold facade.

“Your Grace,” you say in acceptance of his decision, bowing your head to show deference. You turn and glance at the linens still stacked on top of the king’s bed and fret for a moment that you will get in trouble for not fulfilling your duties and changing the sheets. “Should I change the bedsheets before I leave?”

Aegon doesn’t even turn to face you, his eyes fixed on his chalice. His expression is closed off, distant, as he responds with a simple grunt of confirmation.

“Yes, yes. Do whatever it is you usually do,” he mutters dismissively, his voice lacking any real feeling. He lifts his cup to his mouth once more, drowning himself in the bitter taste of the wine.

You nod with the typical words of respectful assent and begin making the bed as you always do, except this time it feels different. Today you flew so very close to the sun and felt your skin bask in its heat. The absence of that warmth now leaves you feeling chilly, an overwhelming nothing replacing the typical humdrum of your chores. You can feel his presence in the room like a beacon calling you to shore, but you dare not approach him again.

When you finish your task, you leave the king’s chambers without saying a word, closing the door behind you as silently as you can.

For the next few days, the typical royal indifference that Aegon shows you is substituted for complete and utter disregard. He at least showed you a degree of quiet appreciation before, but now it seems he’s going out of his way to make it known that you do not exist to him. Aegon always keeps his eyes turned from you and makes no acknowledgment of your proximity, giving the impression that you are little more than a ghost.

Gone is the care-free spirit that the king usually possesses, always trying to pretend that he is happier than he actually is, at least when you are around him. It seems that Aegon erects a wall of guarded apathy the moment he becomes aware of you, sometimes so severe that you can actually see him transition into a frown at your approach.

You find yourself slinking around quietly whenever you must occupy his room at the same time that he is present. The mornings are especially tense, when you must bring breakfast and fresh wash water for his basin. Sometimes, you feel his eyes on you when you’re preoccupied with adding wood to and stoking the fire, but you try your best to ignore it since you can’t make heads or tails of his behavior.

For the most part, you attempt to finish the majority of your duties once the king has left for the day and not before that point. You hope that in time, the king will forget about what transpired between the two of you, and that everything will revert back to how it was.

—Aegon

Aegon has made a concerted effort to maintain his frosty disposition towards you. It’s a constant battle between his heart, which secretly admires and yearns for you, and his head, which refuses to acknowledge the vulnerability he allowed you to witness. Even still, he can’t help but feel a slight pang of sadness whenever you try to slip in and out of his chambers undetected, nor can he control the surge of resentment when he feels that he might need you in any way.

The king simply doesn’t know what to make of the tangle of emotions that twist inside of him whenever he sees your face. It’s as if the memory of his shortcomings and your comforting embrace is a fresh wound that refuses to heal. He wants to shove you from his mind, but your image is permanently branded on the backs of his eyelids.

Even his nights have become restless, with no amount of drink or pleasure helping to ease his troubled heart. In fact, he’d already tried visiting one of his favorite brothels, dragging along his drunken friends for the chance to brag at how loud he could make the women scream. He was so distracted by thoughts of you that he couldn’t even stay hard and had to call it a night without release, defeated even by the the carefree abandon of a whore’s cunt.

The only thing that helps him drift off to sleep lately is recalling the moment he shared with you, and imagining how it might have gone differently if he had not pulled away from you. His hand enveloping his rigid cock, stroking it eagerly as he envisions what it would be like to reach under your skirts and feel the heat at the apex of your thighs. The resulting climax is strong, but it always leaves him feeling ashamed and guilty afterwards, as though he’s given into an urge worse than the crudest of debaucheries.

It’s becoming more and more obvious, that no matter how much he denies himself, he wants you in an unbearable way. He wants to reach out to you, wants to apologize and thank you for your soothing care. He wants those arms wrapped around him once again, that gentle hand running through his hair. He wants to confess all of his troubles to you. How he is tired of being treated like a child, of being scolded and slapped around by his mother, and never being taken seriously by his own small council. Aegon wants to hear the solutions you might propose to his growing list of problems, instead of relying on the wine that he drinks to excess more often as the days pass, an answer that he knows is mere avoidance.

And so, the king finds himself at a crossroad, facing a decision that can’t simply remain unsettled. He can either choose to embrace his feelings for you and allow himself the chance of experiencing the compassion he so badly craves, or he can continue to repress those feelings and bury them under the weight of his own self loathing and fear.

At the end of another long and monotonous day, he finds himself sitting at the end of his table in the very same chair where he had shared a moment of weakness with you. He sighs as he pours himself another cup of wine, the burgundy liquid not doing much to take the edge off tonight.

He shivers slightly as gooseflesh erupts over his pale skin. Glancing out the window, he can see that the skies are grayer than usual and that autumn is settling in over King’s Landing. Aegon begins to worry as he considers the already dwindling food supply and the civil war that is ravaging what little they have left. His grand-sire and mother both seem to be ignoring the constant plight of the commonfolk, but he’s spent enough time amongst them to know that revolt might loom on the horizon.

The large wooden doors to his chamber suddenly open and his attention is drawn from the window, snapped to the form now entering the room. It is you, his chambermaid, carrying a bundle of blankets. You stop dead in your tracks as you notice him sitting in the dwindling light of the gloaming hour.

“Sorry to disturb, Your Grace,” you offer sheepishly. “I didn’t know you had already retired for the day.”

Aegon turns his chair outwards, sitting sideways as he leans an elbow against the table and lifts his cup to his lips, taking a sip of his favorite sweet Arbor red. He doesn’t acknowledge your apology, and instead regards you with a steadfast gaze as he tries to hide his conflicting feelings.

“What is it?” he asks, his tone tinged with disinterest.

“It’s supposed to be chilly tonight,” you answer with a soft voice. “I wanted to bring you some extra blankets and build the fire up so that you are comfortable.”

“Hm,” he grunts, taking another swig of his wine. He doesn’t respond more than that and simply watches as you begin to lay two massive quilts upon his bed, then approach the fireplace to add more wood and stoke the flames. Even now you were doing your best to take good care of him, doting on him as though he were your very own husband.

He can’t help but discreetly study the shape of your body as you kneel before the mantle, appreciating the way the firelight projects shadows over your kneeling figure. The flickering orange light bounces off your face and he can’t help but notice the softness of your features, the curve of your cheek and lips. As you rise back to your feet and turn to face him, he’s finally made his decision.

Perhaps it is time to lay these fears to rest.

He sighs softly, his shoulders slumping somewhat with the release of breath, as he gestures to the chair across from him.

“Sit,” his word is quiet, almost a whisper.

You look at him perplexed as though you did not hear him properly, an apprehension soon settling in as you hesitate to respond.

There is an air of determination in his eyes as he nods once more, encouraging you to sit. His voice now holds a trace of insistence as he shifts in his seat, sitting upright as he repeats himself. “I said sit.” Aegon points at the empty chair once more, his gesture sharper this time.

You oblige him swiftly at that, taking a seat in the ornately carved high-back chair, your legs are pressed together and your hands fidget awkwardly on your lap. Aegon reaches forward and grabs an empty chalice from the silver tray before him, pouring you a glass of wine.

“Here,” he says, his voice strangely calm in your presence now that he has finally given in to his wishes. He hands you the cup across the table, his fingers brushing against yours for just the briefest of moments. He relishes in the heat of your touch, no matter how fleeting, and offers a clumsy smile. “Have a drink with me.”

You take the chalice reluctantly, the anxiety of such taboo evident in your expression. Aegon knew it was unheard of for the staff to share a drink with members of the royal family, but it was also not typical for the king to be denied anything he desired either.

“T-thank you, Your Grace,” you offer appreciatively.

Aegon settles back into his chair, his posture becoming more relaxed as he spreads his legs. He takes comfort in the fact that no matter how much he has tried to avoid you, that you still humbly show him gratitude. That small act of polite civility has him convinced that what he is attempting will not end in rejection.

He raises his cup and toasts to you, a courtesy which seems so simple and yet holds so much significance when coming from a king. “To your service.” His eyes gleam in the fading light of day, bright with unspoken promise.

“I don’t even know what to say, Your Grace,” you squeak out in embarrassment, your face impossibly red as you direct your gaze away from him.

He can feel his confidence returning as he sees the flush of color bloom on your cheeks. It’s a sign that his attention is not entirely unwelcome, and that thought alone is enough to make his heart beat steadily in his chest.

Aegon leans forward, trying to capture your attention once more, his eyes pleading for you to look at him again. After so much time evading this very situation, he now feels hungry for it.

“You don’t have to say anything at all,” he reassures you, his tone softened but with a hint of authority as he motions for you to drink your wine.

Without wavering, you grasp the heavy brass chalice in your hands and with courage etched in your features, take a long draught of the Arbor red.

As you drink, Aegon raises an eyebrow in mild surprse, watching as you take a rather ambitious swig of strongwine. He finds he’s actually impressed with your ability, and his expression soon transforms into a smirk of amusement.

He takes a sip from his own chalice before setting it back down on the table. “You drink deeper than many of my knights, I can tell you that,” he jests with a good-humored ease, testing the boundaries of this fledgling dynamic.

Your cheeks blush once more although this time it is likely due to the wine as well as your timidity. “This is much better than the swill the staff typically has access to,” you offer almost apologetically, as though it were not proper for you to imbibe in your spare time.

The admission has the corners of his mouth curling into a grin once more, and a breathy laugh escapes his lips. It’s clear now that the two of you are finally making progress, the barrier of propriety quickly falling away as it typically did with drink.

“So you mean to say you enjoy good wine, yes?” he teases lightly, tapping his fingertips against the edge of his cup, his gaze focused on you, eager to see your reaction.

“I am enjoying it, yes,” you say with bright eyes, your guilt beginning to fade away with each sip of sweet wine you take.

Aegon can sense the increased ease in your demeanor, and is delighted by the sight of it. He knows that the alcohol has broken through the tension that’s been building between the two of you for days now and he plans to take full advantage of it, feeling even bolder in his pursuit of you.

“Good,” he replies gladly, feeling content with the newfound freedom he’s allowed himself. “Then have some more,” Aegon adds, his tone light and playful as he pushes the decanter of wine closer to you, encouraging you to fill your own cup. He can feel a pleasant buzzing in his head from the strongwine, and can tell that you aren’t far behind him.

“Is Your Grace trying to get me drunk?” you ask, a surprising riposte that he didn’t expect from you.

The question has Aegon laughing aloud, the sound hearty and full of mirth. He leans closer, sliding his elbow further along the table as he offers you a grin. That little spark of humor you show only heightens his own sense of urgency to be in your arms once more.

The king rests his chin on his fist, and raises a brow at you with a mischievous grin. “And what if I was?” he replies playfully.

“Then I’d have to ask to what aim?” you say holding onto your cup, your finger tracing the circular rim of it.

Aegon’s gaze is drawn to your fingers, following the movement as his pulse quickens. He can hear your question, but it fails to register fully as he’s momentarily lost in a daydream of those same fingers running across his skin. His mouth goes dry and his skin feels hot. He finds he must take another large draught of wine to calm the sudden surge of longing that courses through him.

“Well,” he says, his tone feigning seriousness. “Perhaps I intend to get you drunk so I might take advantage of you.”

Aegon is surprised when you chuckle in response to his daring assertion, having expected more of a demure reaction instead. “You would not have to ply me with wine for that,” you admit, lowering your head slightly as though realizing how direct your words had been a little too late.

His eyes go temporarily wide as he registers your brazen honesty, wondering if he’d even heard you correctly. “Do you jest with your king, girl?” he asks incredulously.

“No,” she offers adamantly, with all the defiance of a loyal hound. “I’m afraid I’d be quite willing.”

“Is that so?” Aegon says more for his own confirmation than to communicate it, his eyebrow raising with dubious intent.

His stiffening cock was becoming uncomfortable in his taut breeches and he couldn’t help but consider the irony that such an innocent encounter had taken on an incredibly sexual nature. The comfort you had offered him becoming like an intoxicating fuel to his loins, making you far more attractive than any other woman could ever possibly be in his eyes.

“And what would you be willing to do in order to satisfy your king?” he prods further, feeling confident that he has the upper hand now. His desire to claim everything you have to offer now undeniable.

“I-I,” you begin to stutter nervously, clearly not expecting such a blunt response from him. “What is it you wish of me?”

Aegon let’s out a sharp huff of delight at the question you pose. To his great joy it seems you truly don’t realize the effect you have over him right now. He stands from his chair, sending it backwards with the backs of his thighs. His legs then carry him around the corner of the table until he’s towering above you, looking down upon your trembling form with a burning hunger.

“The real question is.. What don’t I desire of you?” he poses the question with a lurid tone as he thumbs the neckline of your bodice. “I believe you’ll find me quite insatiable in my needs.”

You’re frozen in his sights, appraising him with frightened doe-eyes, but there is no mistaking the undercurrent of lust also hidden right below the surface. Likely, the only true trepidation you have is the thought of performing such acts out of wedlock, but it seems obvious to Aegon at least, that you should have no concerns when offering your virtue up to a king. And given the poorly state of mind he’s been in as of late and desperate weakness he has for you, it’s possible you might even be assisting in the betterment of the realms.

“You’re speechless,” he hums softly, running the back of his knuckles over your bare collarbone. “Don’t worry, I will do the talking,” he says with a smirk, delighted to hear that he sounds every bit the authoritative ruler he should. “Take my hands,” he commands softly, reaching down as he grasps you and encourages you to rise from your chair.

When you obligingly follow his orders and rise before him, Aegon then guides you, leading you towards the bed. He stops once the backs of your knees hit the wooden frame, which is now padded by many layers of newly laid quilts, and turns you away from him. His hands carefully unfasten your apron, tossing it over the footboard before he starts to work at untying the laces of your dress. He loosens them swiftly until your bodice hangs slack.

He’s very well practiced in the art of removing a woman’s clothing, whether they be a whore, a noblewoman, or even a servant as is your case. Still, he holds a certain fondness for you, a consideration that he does not offer readily to most of his conquests. You have given him something so valuable, a treasure that no other has even thought to bestow upon him, and he means to reward you well for it.

Aegon finally removes your dress, pulling it over your head and placing it on top of the apron. All that remains now is a long sleeved undershirt, a slightly more drab version of the sort all women wore under their dresses. He’d like to rip it from your body, but you’ve stirred up such tenderness within his empty heart that he is loathe to treat you in such a way.

Instead, he turns you to face him once more and takes a step back to regard you. “You truly are beautiful,” he states with a sort of quiet awe. He had never really noticed you before and he most definitely should have. What with your cornsilk blond hair and bright blue eyes. Was he really so oblivious to the people and the world around him that he couldn’t even notice such a stunning, caring maiden working directly under his nose? Had he always been avoiding any state of mental clarity and missed so much in the process of hiding from himself?

You look at him nervously, your body antsy as you shift uneasily, precariously balanced on the edge of the mattress.

“Sit,” he tells you in a hushed tone, not quite wanting to sound as bossy as he does, but trying to relieve you of your discomfort. He takes another step back once you have complied, his gaze now roaming your body, taking in the sight of you, or at least what he can see in that loose potato sack of a frock you’re wearing. Aegon can definitely make out some of your feminine curves though, the slope of your shoulder incredibly pleasing as is the way your breasts protrude noticeably through the fabric, and so too do your wide hips.

He smiles warmly at you, his eyes taking their time to appreciate the woman before him. He can’t help but ponder in this moment, how he’s never felt this way before, a lust that isn’t just physical in nature, but somehow more genuine. Aegon is no stranger to carnal pleasures and strongly desires to claim you in every way possible. But there is something more present in his heart as well, the wish to hold you close and protect you from the entire world, and to in turn be sheltered by you from the chaos of the Iron Throne.

Aegon decides then that he wants your first time together to be gentle, just as it was when you first came together. He closes the distance between the two of you and reaches out with both hands, grabbing softly on either side of your shoulders. Your soft, supple flesh gives pleasingly beneath his fingers as he guides you to lay down on top of the blankets. As you scoot backwards across the width of the bed, he can’t help but feel a sense of satisfaction that you were finally in his bed and no longer a fantasy inside his mind.

Once you’ve nestled into the plushness beneath you, he steps back again, his fingers making quick work of removing his woolen doublet. A flush of excitement blooms across his alabaster skin as he makes a show of the action, enjoying the way you watch him with such focused anticipation. He casts the garment to the floor, now removing his boots as swiftly as he can.

With his breeches already half undone and his chest exposed beneath a simple linen shirt, he is gifted with the sight of you lying in his bed in wait. The image is far more pleasant, far more intimate, than any other woman he has ever taken to bed. Your warmth radiates outward like a blazing fire and by now he is desperate to feel your heat directly. He practically rips his undershirt off, flinging it sideways across the covers.

Aegon makes his way back to you, lifting one knee up onto the mattress and crawling over the entire length of your body until he is face to face with you. His hand cradles your jaw tenderly, caressing up and down until his fingers slip up into your long, flowing tresses.

His intense, violet eyes fix upon yours, looking for any hesitation, but he sees none. It was as though you had been given to him as a gift from the gods, you who always gave and never took from him. There is a vulnerability in his expression that is rarely visible, replacing his usual display of smugness.

He maneuvers his breeches down without much effort, kicking them off once they’re low enough. Now fully settled into the valley of your spread legs, Aegon then grips the hem of your shift, lifting it up your thighs until he feels your body tense. He glances up at you and sees a pang of worry present that is perfectly normal, especially for a maiden.

The king asks the question he’s sure he already knows the answer to. “Have you done this before?”

You shake your head no as a blush of pink covers your cheeks and you bite your lip with pent up longing. Even with your inexperience and worry, he can tell how eager you are regardless. Much like he had been warring with his own thoughts about pursuing more with his chambermaid, you seem torn between your fears and your desires as well.

Aegon smiles sincerely, brushing his thumb gently along your lower lip, before leaning down to give you a chaste kiss. It was a bit of a selfish wish of his that you were untainted by any other man, and a part of him was happy to hear that you were indeed a virgin. It made him revel in delight; knowing you were his alone, that he’d be your first and your last if he had any say in it.

“Relax,” he whispered parting from your lips. “I’ll go slowly.” Aegon gazes at you again, wondering if this is perhaps too much for you, too soon. “That is if you still wish to.”

A look of panic crosses your face, as though you’re worried he might stop. “N-No! I still want to!” you affirm urgently. Your hands wrap around his back, pulling him closer to you, seemingly unwilling to let him go.

The king can barely contain his elation as he presses his forehead to yours, chuckling slightly at your eagerness. His hand slips beneath your undershirt and he slowly strokes the soft skin of your stomach, his fingers grazing over the warm plains of your flesh. Aegon’s breath hitches as he travels higher up your abdomen, finding the pliant curve of your breast.

You moan softly beneath his greedy touch, your body writhing with fervor, and your hips rising impatiently to meet him. Any question he had that you might not be fully keen about this joining was now all but diffused by your enthusiasm.

“You make such pretty sounds,” he teases playfully, feeling a sense of satisfaction at how responsive you are to his touch. He gives your breast a firm squeeze, then teases over the sensitive areola before cupping the whole mound again. His cock throbs painfully against the mattress, still bound by his smallclothes and yearning to sink into your heat.

His pulse pounds with expectation, finally feeling a sense of relief from the pent up desire he’s held for you all of this time. Aegon removes his hand from under your shift, propping himself up on the bed as he reaches down to unlace his braie. His hand brushes against your core in the process and he shivers at the feel of how wet you already are for him.

With his stiff length finally freed, he ventures a finger along your folds, growling at the silky slickness of your center. “Gods,” he utters with a groan. His cock twitches with need as he tests the tightness of your cunny, eyes rolling back in ecstasy as he imagines thrusting into you with his thick member instead of his digit.

“Are you ready for me, girl?” he asks eagerly, the question a soft inquiry as well as a warning of the impending pain his intrusion is likely to cause. At this point, he feels more like a lovesick boy than the Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, his suspense heavy as he drapes your leg around his his hip, opening you more to him. He positions his head at your entrance and presses himself closer to you.

You nod, never taking your eyes off of him as you wrap your hands around his back. Aegon rests his weight on his elbows, covering you completely as he kisses you with tenderness. He tries to express everything he feels for you with actions instead of words, his lips hungrily devouring yours with passion. Without breaking the kiss, he begins to ease into you slowly, immediately feeling the resistance of your still in tact virtue.

His arms slide down, gripping your hips on each side tightly as his chest presses into yours. You let out a whimper into his mouth as he breaches your depths, your thighs clenching against his body at the sharp pain of his invasion. It doesn’t take long for you to relax again, your walls suddenly more welcoming as the sting subsides.

Aegon parts from your lips, pulling back slightly so he can look down at you. A smirk forms on his face as he sees your lurid expression and he begins to move, his hips rolling against yours in a slow, sensual rhythm. His hands slide down to your thighs, spreading them further apart as he thrusts himself deeper inside you. He groans with overwhelming pleasure at the feel of you, his head falling forward as he picks up the pace.

He kisses you again, forcing his tongue into your mouth as he continues to move inside of you. His tongue dances with yours as he begins to lose control, his hips snapping against you with intensity. Aegon can feel his release approaching quickly, unable to hold back for much longer, he tries to hasten you along to satisfaction. His hand slides up your shift once more, squeezing your breast and tweaking your delicate nipple until it pebbles between his fingers.

You squirm under him, incapable of holding still as he drives into you with increased enthusiasm. The king grinds his hips into you relentlessly, grimacing at the way your walls tighten around his cock like a vice. Aegon’s grip on your tit becomes harder, flipping between gripping and tweaking your sensitive nipple. His lips withdraw abruptly, his mouth searching out your other breast and nipping it through your undershirt.

He grins against the cloth as you cry out loudly, your body rigid as your climax rolls over you and soon he can feel it wash over his length as well. But, he can’t take it anymore, not how tight you are or how creamy your release feels on his tender cockhead. It’s all too much and within a moment he is gripping hard to your flesh and burying himself deep within you, his spend erupting in spurts from his pulsing member.

“Fuuuccck,” he growls out, his hands finding their way beneath your back and pulling you towards him securely, trying to get even closer if that was at all possible.

You pant below him, trying to catch your breath as little spasms continue to twitch throughout your back and your thighs tremble against his hips. A warm, blissful calm settles over him as he nestles his face into the crook of your neck and inhales deeply of your scent. He feels pleasantly dizzy, his heartbeat finally slowing as the haze of lust subsides.

Aegon sighs into your ear, the tone content and relaxed. “That was incredible,” he murmured softly, his voice low as he gently runs his hand along the side of your cheek.

“It was,” is all you can manage to say, your breath still a bit ragged as you try to come down from the high.

Your hand finds its way into his white hair again, brushing up against the nape of his neck and causing him to shiver. He’s once again reminded of the shared encounter that started all of this and he’s overcome with a fondness that makes his chest ache.

Aegon feels closer to you in every possible way now and isn’t keen on the idea of parting from you, but he can feel his cock softening and the mess beginning to pool on the sheets. So he slowly pulls out of you, collapsing onto the bed at your side. He grabs one of his stray garments without looking, probably his smallclothes or maybe his shirt, and cleans up his seed from you first and then himself.

He adjusts towards the head of the bed, resting on his side against the pillows and reaching out for you to join him as he scuttles under the covers. “Come here,” he says softly, pained by the loss of her warmth.

As you get up and crawl towards him, he scoops you up into his arms. Aegon holds you close, his chin resting against the top of your head as he wraps the quilts around your form and presses himself tighter against your back. The king can no longer deny the depth and the power of his feelings for you as you cuddle in his arms. There’s a sense of deep security and comfort welling up within him, but any words seem inadequate in this moment.

Aegon kisses your temple, the doting gesture unlike anything he’s bestowed upon a lover before. “I think I’m going to sleep quite well tonight,” he muses into your hair, still cradling you in his arms.

“Are you sure it’s alright for me to stay with you? In your chambers?” you ask quietly with seemingly no clue how ridiculous he thinks you sound for asking such a thing.

His mouth twitches into a small smile and he lifts his chin to press another kiss into your hair.

“Of course. I’m the king. I can do whatever I want,” he quips playfully, his voice sounding drowsy and relaxed as he settles into the plushness of the bed. “Now, come. Get your rest. You’re going to need it.” There is a gentle warning present in his tone that you do not seem to catch, that he intends to have more of you in the morning.

You nod, twisting your back towards the mattress until you’re facing him. The expression you give him is enough to make his heart melt, those big, blue eyes like deep pools filled with bottomless love and devotion. You wrap your hand behind his neck and pull him close for a kiss, a request he’s more than happy to oblige.

Your mouth is sweet and hot against his and he can’t help but to lick the line of your lower lip before parting from you. Aegon settles you back into place, his chest enveloping your smaller frame as he holds you possessively. He feels such solace in the close proximity of your body, his limbs toasty warm as he falls into a deep state of relaxation. He’s not even aware of when the moment he falls asleep, it happens so quickly.

—Aegon

When the first light of day streams through the window, Aegon finds his eyes drifting open and then closing again, not sure of what time it is, but too comfortable to want to move. His back feels incredibly warm with the slight dampness of sweat and he opens his lids once more to see your arm wrapped over his chest. He can feel your hot breath at his neck now that he’s paying attention fully and your leg slotted between his.

Aegon’s lips curl into a satisfied smile, basking in the near domestic feel of waking up like this with someone he actually cares for. He takes your hand and intertwines his fingers with yours as he rests his own arm on top of yours.

He tries to settle into his pillow once more, nuzzling his backside into you further and bending his knees more deeply. The peace is short lived though as the doors to his chamber fling open and he hears the startled gasp of a woman. It couldn’t be just any woman, like perhaps another maid come to clean his room in place of the one that never showed up for work. No, it had to be his mother, of all the people he did not wish to see this morning.

The king whips his head over his shoulder and squints in the direction of the door. His mother stands there with a hand over her mouth, frozen in horrified disbelief as though she’d just seen a ghost. Aegon grits his teeth, sitting up with a jolt, forced to realize just how compromising this situation must look with the way he was tangled in bed naked with you.

“No, no, no, no, no, Aegon!!” she practically screams at him and the sound jars you from your slumber. He wishes you could have stayed asleep, to have escaped the madness of his family for just a little longer.

Alicent picks up her skirts so she can walk swiftly around the bed and to his side, standing there with a judgmental sneer. “This is just like Diana, isn’t it!?” she cries hysterically. “Isn’t it!?” his mother prods him further.

Aegon looks back, catching your shifting uneasiness from his peripheral vision, then turns to his mother again, suddenly feeling very protective of you. You are innocent in all of this and should be afforded the ability to wake up from your first time making love in some semblance of calm, not to one of his mother’s outbursts. And of course the first thought she would have of him was that he had raped yet another servant girl. His mother was blissfully ignorant of everything he had done as a young man, except for the acts she felt the need to berate him for, even though she had never been around to offer any kind of proper guidance.

He lets out a groan of exasperation, running his fingers through his mussed hair and tries to think of an answer that might satisfy his fuming mother, but he knows this is a lost cause.

“No,” he denies, shaking his head as he avoids eye contact with her. There is no conviction in his tone, but it’s not like she would ever believe a thing he said on the matter.

“So it was consensual then?” the Dowager Queen asks glaring past Aegon and looking straight at you.

He glances to his side and sees you nod, but interrupts before you can say anything more. “You do not have to explain yourself to her,” he says in a much softer voice, trying to shield you from his mother.

“So, she’s just another one of your tramps then!” Alicent hisses with disgust. “Is it so hard for you to keep your hands off the staff? Can’t be bothered to go into the city anymore, you need to make sure you find your pleasure within the walls of the Red Keep?” Her words are vitriolic and hateful without any attempt to understand the situation.

“I should have gotten rid of your father’s little bastard when I had the chance. I should have known better that she would be too pretty for you to resist, but I was assured that the girl’s skills were tantamount to any risk,” she continued on her tirade, barking out every spiteful dagger she could think of.

“What of your wife!? How can you carry on like this!? Oblivious to the people you hurt!?” the Queen Dowager prattled on, not waiting for an answer, but seemingly wanting to preach her conclusions endlessly.

“You know Helaena’s fallen deep into sadness ever since Jaehaerys died. Ever since you forced her to endure that disgusting funeral procession through the streets of the city.. And it’s not like we ever had a deep connection even before that, Mother.” Aegon’s voice was bitter, resentful. He was sick and tired of this farce of familial love when she barely ever showed him any hint of it.

He’s incredibly shocked when he hears you speak up, your voice quiet, but accusing, even defensive, “You’re one to talk, Queen Dowager. You hurt Aegon more than any other.”

“How dare you! You insolent wretch!” his mother didn’t hesitate to bite back, her acrimony potent in the air. “You can consider your employ here ended. Gather your belongings and leave!” she looked at you impatiently, as though expecting you to stand immediately and go. “Now!” she snarled, her nose crinkled with anger.

“No,” the king interceded on your behalf, stilling you with his hand on your hip. “You will not go anywhere.”

“She absolutely will go! This is not acceptable behavior for any chambermaid in the employ of the royal family!” Alicent was insistent, with no sign of backing down, but Aegon had enough of this contest of wills.

“Mother!” he bellowed at her furiously, finally snapping back at her with conviction. “I am the king and you will obey me!”

That finally got her attention, for the first time in his entire life he saw a flash of fear in his mother’s eyes and it only emboldened him to continue.

“You will not do a thing to this girl. She is under my protection,” he added, his ruling absolute. “And if I find that you have touched her, hurt her in any way, then I will have you hung. Just like the rat catchers.”

Aegon’s lips curl upwards in smug satisfaction, finally realizing a fraction of the true power he held as sovereign of the realms. His mother did not respond, regarding him with silent malice, her glare ever testing the limits to see if he truly meant it. When she saw that he did, his mother backed down, her shoulder slumping slightly as she relented, but not before getting one last dig in.

“Very well, My King,” she mocked with false sincerity, giving him a sarcastic curtsy. “I will leave you to your dalliances. I should know better than to interrupt a man having his fun.” She left in a flurry of resentment, slamming the door behind her with a loud thud.

No matter how furious he was with his mother, she still remained his parent, the woman who gave him life, whom he loved and had once revered above all else. Even this victory he had over her felt hollow, and he realized that even when he won, he still lost in one way or another.

He turned to you, his expression a mix of concern and tenderness. Aegon stroked gently at the side of your cheek, wanting to make you feel safe again after you’d been forced to tolerate the full brunt of his mother’s wrath. He found you to be more resilient than he’d ever expected, already sitting up and staring at him with a knowing look upon your face.

“I’m so sorry,” you say softly and almost instantly he feels something within his chest fracture.

It might have been the facade he always wore cracking, how he always projected an image of indifferent merriment so none would know how truly miserable he was. It might even have been the very fact that you had suffered insults by associating with him and yet you were still concerned about his well being.

Aegon can feel tears welling in his eyes and when you spread your arms out towards him, he doesn’t hesitate to crash into you. He buries his face in your comforting bosom and finally allows himself to fall apart in your embrace without shame. It’s probably the safest and most accepted he’s ever felt in his entire life and he knows now that he won’t ever be able to exist without you.

As you rake your fingers through his silvery locks, his tears dwindle until he is left relaxed, sated by your validation that his life is not as easy as everyone might think it is. He listens to your heartbeat as his fingers dig firmly into your back, making sure you can never leave his side. It’s a mercy, that you don’t seem to mind how clingy and needy he is. If anything, you seem born to mend his wounds, a soothing balm to his troubled soul.

You lean back against the pillows and soon Aegon finds himself drifting asleep against you. As his aching eyes begin to close, he can’t help but hope that he never disappoints you. He’s so convinced that he is a failure from the constant disparagements he’s endured throughout his life, that he can’t even fully enjoy you without worrying that he isn’t worthy of you - that you might leave him.

As if reading his mind, your hand massages gently along his scalp, cradling his head closer to your breast. “Don’t worry,” you say reassuringly. “It’s going to be alright. I promise.”

Aegon didn’t know how you could possibly promise him such a thing, but somehow hearing you say it aloud makes him actually want to believe it.

Read Chapter 2

And will you be bold Will you lose control? I could never desert you I could never let go If you fall in line And the zenith calls I'm standing waiting The last to fall

~Starset - Last to Fall

[ahgasegotarmy116]

Just Take It | Jeon Jungkook | Part Three

Summary: You settle into your new normal with Jungkook but looks like this new normal is going to get a little more interesting Pairing: Inexperienced f!reader x Best Friend's Dad Jungkook (20 year age gap) Word Count: 7k~ (Damn I spoiled ya'll lmao) Warnings: Smuuuuttt, Explicit Language and a crap ton of pet names (I'm sorry okay I love pet names lmao) a/n: I got carried away with this one and it's barely edited but I wanted to post it asap since I left you guys hanging for so long. I know I used hella pet names but I had to okay it was very necessary if you ask me 🤭 Requested by: @kkusadmirer 💜

After getting up from my nap yesterday Jungkook and I spent the night just talking about anything and everything and nothing all at the same time. It's been nice getting to see him in this kind of context, the both of us totally relaxed and comfortable around each other. He does throw the occasional compliment or flirt my way and it gets to me every time but I try to hide it. I have a horrible poker face though and he knows it.

Sunday morning started out the same as yesterday, minus the hangover thank God. I woke up late and Jungkook had lunch ready for me along with a coffee made just how I like it. "How do you know how I like my coffee?" I ask while taking a sip, smiling when I see his body stutter for a second before relaxing and going back to cleaning up, even though I told him I would do it after I finished eating. 

"I just kind of noticed from the times you would sleep over and have breakfast the next morning with Jina" he says and I nod my head, a reasonable enough answer but still cute that he took the time to make sure he got it right. "Do you have any plans today?" I ask and he shakes his head no before responding. 

"No, not really. I was planning on going on a hike later on though if you'd like to join me" he offers and I cringe at the thought. "Are you going to be running?" I ask, knowing for a fact that I couldn't keep up with him even if I tried. "I said go for a hike not a run Darling" he chuckles, his pet name of choice always causing a fluttery feeling in my stomach. 

"Then okay, if you don't mind" I say and he brightens up at my answer before telling me the details and soon enough we're getting in his car and heading out. 

"What's the name of this place again?" I question as I unbuckle my seatbelt, looking over at him while he does the same.  "Lunar Falls, I'm guessing you haven't been here before" he says with a crooked smile before getting out of the car. "No, I don't think I've ever heard of it. I guess it's because I'm not much of a nature girly" I respond truthfully and he chuckles at my wording. "Well hopefully this will convince you otherwise" he finishes while we make our way to the path. 

~~~~ 

After we've been walking for a bit I start to notice a bit more of the wild life and Jungkook humors me when I stop and watch as a little bunny hops around in a little clearing we're passing. 

"Do you like bunnies?" he questions, his eyes crinkling at the sides while he smiles softly. "I do! I used to have one when I was a little girl" I say while watching it continue to hop along. "What was their name?" he questions, eyes totally focused on me without my knowledge. "Bunny!" I say, turning my face back towards him, eyes lighting up at the memories I made with her.

I watch as Jungkook gives me a crooked smile and holds back a laugh. "What's so funny?" I ask, scrunching my eyebrows together. "No, no it's nothing. It's just that Bunny isn't a very imaginative name for a bunny" he laughs, finally letting it loose. "I was four okay leave me alone" I mumble, crossing my arms over my chest and pretending to be upset. 

I start to walk away and make my way further up the path but he jogs up in front of me, and stops me in my tracks. "Hey, hey I'm sorry I just thought it was cute" he explains, making my ears go red and I walk around him wordlessly and continue up the path, making him feel even more guilty.

"Are you mad at me?" he questions, walking beside me and I glance over at him briefly before cracking a smile. "No I'm not mad at you, I was just playing around" I say, uncrossing my arms and settling into a more relaxed posture to further support my claims. "Okay good" he says, visibly relieved and following suit and settling into a more relaxed pace. 

As we continue walking we stop a few more times to look at more wildlife and as we finally make our way to the top I stop in my tracks. "What's wrong?" he asks stoping beside me, following my line of sight and notices that I'm staring at three beautiful waterfalls with a steady stream of crystal clear water rushing down them into a great big pool that's as pure as the water falling into it. 

"You don't like it?" he questions, worried that he might've oversold the place to me since I haven't moved or said a word once I laid sight on it. "N-no, no Jungkook this is amazing!" I stutter out, hardly believing that something this beautiful had been so close to home this whole time. "Really? I thought you might like it but from your reaction you kind of had me second guessing myself" he says while rubbing the back of his neck, almost looking bashful. 

"No I mean it this is incredible! How did you find this place?" I question, making my way over to take a closer look. "I mean I've always loved to hike and so I looked up places to go hiking when I first moved here and this was the first place that caught my attention" he explains and I nod my head mindlessly, listening but keeping my focus on the scene in front of me, shivering once the mist from the falls starts to hit my skin. 

He takes notice of how silent I've gone and decides to just fall back and let me take my time enjoying the serenity of the moment.

"Thank you for bring me here" I say, turning to face him after a while. "I figured you needed to get out and clear your head for a while" he says softly, walking over to where I'm standing against the railing and watching the various fish that are swimming below us. 

"I can bring you back another time if you'd like?" he asks and I can't help but let my face light up at the offer. "Maybe next time I can bring you after dark? That way you can see why they call it Lunar Falls" he suggests and I agree immediately. "I'd like that" I respond and he nods him head, satisfied with my answer. 

~~~~

After we finished our hike we made our way back to Jungkook's house and got cleaned up, deciding to keep things low key for the rest of the day.

"This has been really nice" I say aloud, voicing my thoughts and garnering his attention while we spend time on his back patio, enjoying the night sky. "What has?" he asks, curious to know more. "Well, being here with you and I don't know, feeling like I'm welcome and appreciated and safe. I feel like it's been a while since I've felt like this" I admit and he nods, listening intently and hanging on every word. 

"Well then I'm glad my intentions have been conveyed well because you are very welcome, appreciated and safe with me" he reassures with a soft smile, making sure to use my wording to show his sincerity. 

"Thank you Jungkook, really, for everything" I say and I see his features soften a bit, relieved that he's been able to help a bit. 

"You're welcome Bunny" he says with a cheeky smile. "Bunny? What happened to Darling?" I laugh, enjoying the switch up, maybe a little bit more than I should. 

"Well you just looked really happy watching the bunnies hopping around, so I feel like the nickname fits. Would it be okay with you if I called you that?" he asks, which makes me want to say yes even more. "You can call me Bunny if you want to" I say, feeling almost a bit bashful at the memory of it. 

"So Bunny, have you thought things through a bit more?" he questions, bringing up the topic I was scared to broach our whole time together. "I'm still not sure what I should do but all I know is that I really don't want to stay there while I try to figure things out" I say and while I take a deep breath before continuing he jumps in. 

"Just stay" he offers again and as much as I want to say yes I don't think it would be the right thing to do. "Jungkook..." "No I'm serious, just stay. What kind of man would I be if I didn't help a friend in need? I told you I have more than enough space for you and it would be nice to have another person around the house again. Things have gotten pretty boring here ever since Jina moved out so please, just stay" he say and I know that he really does mean it. 

"You sure you don't mind?" I question and his face lights up at my words "So you'll stay?" he says, not bothering to answer my question. "Yes I'll stay. But only until I find my own place!" I say, making my motives clear right off the bat. "Of course but you're free to stay as long as you want" he says and I nod my head, excited but also scared that I made the wrong choice. 

Who cares though? There's no reason to deny him since he clearly just wants to help. Lord knows I need all the help I can get...

~~~~

Living with Jungkook for the past month has been great! We work well together and share the household tasks even though he wants me to leave them for him to do. 

"I said I would wash the dishes. Just go sit down and relax, you had a hard day at work today" he says, while coming up behind me and grabbing the sponge out of my hand. "Hey!" I say in protest, reaching out for it while he holds it over my head, water droplets falling on my face. 

"You had a hard day at work too! Plus you cooked tonight so let me do it" I say still jumping up and trying to grab it from him but to no avail he still keeps it far out of my reach. 

He places his hand on me and I falter a bit, feeling his strong touch on my bare waist, my shirt having ridden up a bit from jumping and that's when he gets his way. "Go sit down on the couch and we'll watch a movie together" he says and I just end up looking up at him, watching the way his mouth moves instead of listening to what he's said. 

"Bunny?" he says, squeezing my waist a bit to get my attention. "Huh?" I question, now looking at his eyes, and I see the amusement written all over his face after catching me staring at his lips. 

He leans down and decides to whisper in my ear instead, teasing me mercilessly like he does every now and then and I have to brace myself against the sink behind me to keep my knees from giving out. 

"Go turn on the TV Bunny and we'll watching something together tonight yeah?" he says in a hushed low tone and I'm only able to nod in response, clearing my throat to choke back the whimper my body was begging me to let out. But with the way that he is I know that answer is not good enough for him so he decides to play dirty and starts rubbing circles on my waist, waiting for a verbal answer. 

"What was that Darling? I couldn't hear you" he presses leaving me choking out an 'okay' before slipping out of his hold and running up stairs to get dressed for bed although my main reason is to catch a breath after that. 

After opening and closing my door quietly I throw myself on my bed face down and scream into my pillow. 

'What the fuck am I doing? What the fuck is he doing?' I ask myself and this hasn't been the first occasion I've done this, oh no. These lines have been getting blurrier and blurrier as the days go by and this was one of the reasons I wasn't sure about staying here.

We're both two adults though. Two adults that live in the same house who, as far as I know are attracted to each other. We haven't really talked about that kiss after my engagement party since the morning afterward and nothing like that has happened since. 

I don't know what's supposed to be done in a situation like this but I think I just need to stop over thinking it. If something happens then it happens and that's all there is to it. 

I get up and quickly get changed into more comfortable clothes and head back downstairs and grab a blanket out of the little basket he has before plopping down on the couch and grabbing the remote. 

"Did you pick something out yet?" he asks while coming downstair, also having gone to change into sweats and a t shirt and I glance at him for a second to say something but do a double take after having seen he's wearing grey sweatpants. I can't help but gulp at the sight before quickly looking back at the TV, praying that he didn't catch me but from the way he decides to sit a little closer to me I know I've been caught. 

"Um no, is there something you want to watch?" I ask after clearing my throat and going back to scrolling through our choices. "Let's watch the next episode of that show you showed me last time" he says, picking something he knows I would like to make a choice quickly. "Oh um, yeah sure" I say, typing it in the search bar and pressing play. 

As the show progresses I can't seem to pay the slightest bit of attention to it. All I can think about is the line we've been toeing for a while, and at this point I'm not sure what side of the line I want to end up on. 

"Is everything okay?" he asks, placing his hand on my lap, catching me off guard and making me jump. "Yeah no, I mean yeah everything's fine" I stammer, not really knowing how to respond. He takes his hand off me and nods, not bothering to push anymore so as to not make me anymore uncomfortable than I already look.

I feel bad since I know I've changed up the atmosphere and for what? Because I might have a crush on my ex best friend's dad that I've been living with. Well, now that I lay it out like that I guess I do have something to be conflicted about but I don't know what to do, especially since I think he might like me too. 

"Did you want to watch something else?" he questions, noticing again how spaced out I am. "Can I ask you a question?" I say before I can stop myself. "Ask me anything you want" he says, turning to face me. 

"Why don't you have company over?" I ask the most general question I possibly could, leaving him laughing. "You wanna be a little bit more specific with that?" he chuckles making me squirm in my seat, trying to figure out how else to word this. 

"Well I mean you haven't really had any friends over ever since I started staying here and I feel like I'm kind of getting in the way of your life here" I say truthfully, looking down at my lap, feeling a bit insecure at the fact that I might've overstayed my welcome. 

"What do you mean? Did I do something to make you feel like that?" he asks and I immediately jump in, hating that I even brought this up. "No Jungkook you've been the perfect host I just can't help but think that I'm, I don't know, cramping your style" I say, cringing at my efforts to dance around the subject that I'm really curious about. 

"You're not cramping my style Bunny. I don't have friends over because I don't really enjoy bringing people over to my house. Especially other women" he says the last part in a slower more purposeful tone, making me look up at him embarrassed and relieved that he's gotten down to what I had been getting at. 

"I told you before that first night that you stayed here that I don't have a girlfriend and I'm not seeing anyone. I'm okay with not having someone right now and plus I wouldn't want to ruin what we have going on here" he say, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "What do you mean by that?" I question and he smiles at my adorable reaction from his point of view. 

"That's a topic of discussion for another time Bunny" he says booping my nose and turning back towards the TV and grabbing the remote to change it to something else. "I- what? No tell me please!" I plead but he doesn't budge. "Another time, I promise" he says, giving me a soft smile and I nod my head before letting it droop a bit. 

"I think I'm gonna go to bed" I say, getting up but he grabs my wrist before I can get too far. "Oh come on Bun don't be like that" he says, his eyes full of concern but I know that he won't budge on the subject. "No it's okay I really am tired" I say and gently pull out of his grasp and walk over to the basket to put the blanket back. 

"Are we okay?" he asks, following behind me. "Yes Jungkook we're fine don't worry" I say while turning the face him and my heart stops from seeing how close he is, giving me his undivided attention. After standing there and studying my features for a bit he nods his head and leans towards me, giving me a kiss on the forehead like he always does. 

"Okay Darling, goodnight" he says grabbing my hand and placing a kiss on it as well before letting me walk away after I say a quick 'Goodnight' in response. 

My heart races all the way back to my room and what feels like hours afterwards while I'm laying in bed. I don't know what's happening to me and I'm scared to find out. I never saw myself as someone who would be with an older man but the thought alone excites me when it comes to him. If he means what I thought he meant down there then what am I supposed to do? 

Where do we go from here?

~~~~

It's been a few days since we had that conversation and I wouldn't say things are weird between us but I would definitely say they're not normal. 

I guess until we have that conversation he had mentioned there's gonna be a bit of tension between us. I'm too scared to broach the subject again so that leaves me to just wait helplessly until he brings it up again. 

Putting my keys in the lock and opening the door I'm expecting to see Jungkook downstairs but seeing as I've gotten home a bit early I guess he might be busy doing something else and as I make my way further into the house I hear the shower water running and realize he's in there. 

Walking upstairs I go to put my things in my bedroom but stop in my tracks when I hear what sounds like him calling out my name. 'He doesn't know that I'm home though so why would he be saying my name?' I think to myself and I place my things inside my room before walking over to his door but before I'm able to knock I hear something else that has me stopping in my tracks.

"Fuck yes Bunny just like that. Shit y/n, fuck" I hear Jungkook say between grunts and groans and I unconsciously clench my thighs together. 'I shouldn't be listening to this' I say to myself quietly and turn to go but my feet feel like they're stuck to the floor and I'm drawn back in by the sound of him moaning my name again. 

"Fuck, wish I could have you in here y/n. My pretty little Bunny" he says and I start to hold my breath, trying to catch onto each and every word he says. 'I really shouldn't be doing this' I think to myself but lean in closer, curious to hear more. I've never heard a man moaning like this, let alone hear someone moan my name like this. 

I never knew someone like him would be so, vocal. 

I don't think I'll ever be able to hear him call me Bunny ever again without getting images of what I know he's doing on the other side of this door. "Darling want you so so bad. Come choke on this cock, there you go, just like that Bun" he groans and I know I'm a goner. 

The pulsing feeling between my legs is getting stronger and I can't seem to catch my breath. 'What is this man doing to me? How am I gonna face him after this?' I ask myself but I lean my ear against the door and listen until he finishes, sounds of curses and my name are mixed with a low moan before I hear the shower turn off minutes later. 

I stand there almost frozen in place before my brain catches up seconds later. 'Shit I've gotta get out of here' I scream in my head and run downstairs as fast as I can, grabbing my keys and putting on my shoes before running back to my car. I open it up with my key, not bothering to use the remote in fear of Jungkook hearing it from inside and sit in it for a few minutes, trying to calm my racing heart. 

What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? What the fuck am I supposed to do in a situation like this? It's not like I can call someone and say 'Hey I caught my ex best friend's dad who I happen to be living with moaning my name in the shower. What should I do now?' like who the fuck could I possibly go to to talk about this? 

Taking a few deep breath in and out, I quiet down my racing thoughts as best as I can before opening my car door and heading inside. When I unlock the door I'm stopped in my tracks as I'm met with the sight of Jungkook with his bare back to me while he drinks a cup of water he just poured for himself. 

"Y/n? I didn't know that you'd be coming home so early" he says flashing me a smile and putting his cup down on the counter before walking towards where I stand. "Oh, um yeah we finished up our meeting early so they let us go home" I say while bracing my hand up against the wall while taking my shoes off. 

"I'm glad they let you do that! You've been working way too hard recently" he says while watching me. Just as I'm stepping out of my second shoe I end up tripping over the first leaving Jungkook grabbing my waist to steady me on my feet. "Careful Bun" he says and my heart rate picks up again from almost falling as well as gaining flashbacks of the last time I heard that name from his lips.

"Darling?" he asks, breaking me out of my train of thought "Huh? What?" I ask quickly, straightening back up and pick up my shoes to put them on the shoe rack by the door. "Are you feeling alright?" he asks, taking note of the sweat on my neck and shortness of breath. 

"Yeah I'm fine why do you ask?" I say, looking into his eyes and trying my hardest to not look at his bare torso but ultimately losing the battle, my eyes flickering down to it for a second. He looks down and takes into account that that might be the thing that's making me act like this so he takes a step back to give me some room to breathe. 

"Sorry Bun, I wasn't expecting you to be home this early. Let me go put on a shirt" he says and walks towards the stairs "You don't have to say sorry. It's your house, don't let me stop you" I call after him and he laughs in response before disappearing down the hall and into his bedroom. 

I sit down on the couch to take another breather, begging my flustered self to get over it. I'm flattered that he thinks of me that way but I don't know how to act around him anymore after hearing him. 

Like what am I supposed to do? Pretend like hearing him in the shower didn't turn me on and make me want to beg for him to take my virginity again. What am I supposed to do with this information? 

"Y/n?" he calls out to me again and places his hand on my shoulder, now sporting a black t shirt and appearing behind the couch and looking down at me. "I'm sorry did you say something?" I say after almost jumping out of my seat from the scare he gave me. 

"I said your name like ten times and you didn't respond. Are you sure you're alright?" he says, taking inventory of how I'm acting again. "No, yeah I'm fine don't worry about it. I guess these long days are starting to catch up to me" I say awkwardly scratching my head. He nods and takes his hand off my shoulder, not pressing me for more answers. 

"Maybe you should go lay down until dinner?" he suggests but I go to protest right away. "It was my turn to make dinner tonight though" I say and get up to head into the kitchen but before I can get there he takes a hold of both of my shoulders and stops me in my tracks. 

"No you need rest. Go upstairs and I'll come get you when it's ready" he orders. "But I-" "No buts y/n" "I-" "No. Go" he says, emphasizing each word and not giving me a chance to get in a word edgewise. "Fine" I grumble and he smiles before placing a kiss on my forehead. "It'll be ready soon" he says and turns me by my shoulders and points me towards the stairs. 

I turn to face him and try to say something one more time but he cuts me off again "Go!" he chuckles and I let out a sigh before running up the stairs and into my room. 

~~~~

"Bunny? You awake?" I hear him say as he comes into my room quietly after having sent me upstairs.

Somehow I ended up falling asleep after taking his advice of coming upstairs to lay down and I'm really glad I did. Hopefully I'll be able to act a little more normal now that I've given my brain a rest. 

"Hmm?" I hum out, acknowledging his presence while trying to slowly regain consciousness. "I told you you needed some rest" he says, coming to sit down on my side of the bed. 

"You ready for dinner?" he asks and I nod my head right away leaving him chuckling at my enthusiasm. "Do you want me to bring it up to you?" he asks while brushing the hair off of my face. "No I'll be down in a second" I mumble and he chuckles again at my groggy state. 

"Okay well, don't fall back asleep okay? You don't want it to get too cold" he says, standing up and heading out of the room after gaining a nod in response. I take a deep breath and stretch before sitting up and taking in my surroundings for a second before throwing off the covers and getting out of bed. 

Trudging downstairs I'm met with a the table all set with my favorite meal and a glass of wine for each of us. 

"What's this?" I question sleepily, still rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. "I thought you could use a little pick me up and remembered how much you liked this dish when we tried it for the first time" he says, pulling out my seat and pushing it back in once I've taken a seat. "I feel like I'm at a five star restaurant" I joke and he chuckles at my enthusiasm. "You flatter me" he responds while taking a seat next to me, feeling as though sitting across from each other would feel too distant. 

"Should I have dressed up?" I continue to tease and he does a motion for me to look at what he's wearing and laughs at my question. "Do I look like I'm dressed up to you?" he says, and I smile and shake my head before taking a bite. "This is delicious! It's even better than last time!" I say, humming in content and savoring the rich flavor. "I'm glad you like it! I wasn't sure of the spice blend but I'm glad it worked out alright" he says and take a big bite of his too. 

As dinner continues it feels like normal again, the both of us talking freely and laughing together and it all just feels right, until he uses that nickname again. "Are you feeling better Bunny?" he asks, bringing up my weird behavior from earlier again and suddenly everything comes rushing back. "Yeah I think I really was just tired" I say awkwardly and he nods his head and thinks for a second before saying something else. 

"Did I do something wrong?" he questions and I feel my heart break at his words. "No you didn't do anything wrong I promise. Why would you even say that?" I question, hating that he's doubted himself. 

"I just feel like you've been acting a bit strange these past few days and I just thought I was doing something that might've made you feel uncomfortable" he explains while pushing around the rest of his food with his fork, distracting himself from having to look at me. 

"You've done nothing to make me feel uncomfortable I promise. I've just been tired and drowning myself in work lately so I think it's starting to catch up to me" I say, telling him a half truth. I have been working a lot more lately but I've been doing it to distract myself from having to think about him. 

It feels as thought all I can do is fixate on that conversation and it's been driving me crazy. I just wish that things could go back to the way they were but a part of me wishes that we could be something more than this. What that is exactly I have no clue but I think I might want to find out...

~~~~

After washing the dishes together I tell him that I'm going to bed early and although he looks as though he was about to ask me to stay he nods and says goodnight before letting me go.

Tossing and turning is all I've been able to do since I came back up here and I can't seem to catch a break as my mind plays and replays the sound of him moaning my name. The sounds of him growling in pleasure and praising me as if I was there with him makes me clench around nothing, begging to be full. 

After trying to ignore that feeling as long as I can I finally break. 

I trail my hand down my stomach and play with my waistband, debating on if I should really do this but as the memory of Jungkook's bare torso and his sweatpants hung low along his waist flashes through my mind I finally give in and take my clothes off, leaving me totally bare and open to touch myself.

My right hand trails down my torso just as it had before while my left one trails up and gropes my breast, pinching my nipple and making it harden from the contact. Once my right hand reaches the apex of my thighs I drag my ring finger along my folds, teasing myself and only just barely tracing over my clit. 

I let out a shaky breath and continue my movements, slowly dipping further into my folds and dragging my finger up and down, gathering up my slick, making my movements more fluid. I drag my finger back up and draw circles around my clit, slowly working myself up and starting to get in that fuzzy headspace. 

One that's desperate for release. 

I let out a moans as I pick up the pace, switching to drawing figure eights with my thumb against my sensitive bud while dipping my ring finger into my entrance, making me let out a shaky breath. "Jungkook please" I whimper, my thoughts traveling back to him and how he touched me today, his strong hands on my waist and his intense eyes paying attention to me and only me. 

"Fuck" I say, throwing my head back as I add another finger and continue rubbing my clit. Feeling myself getting closer to that edge I start thinking about how his hands would feel if he touched me like this. My left hand now on my other breast tugs on my other nipple and I call out his name. 

"Jungkook please" I whine, so lost in this fantasy and not bothering to keep quiet anymore to the point of not noticing how he's standing in the doorway and watching me as I pleasure myself to the memory of the sound of his voice. 

"Please what Bunny?" he says in a deep tone, leaving me pulling my fingers out and sitting up, pulling the blanket up higher on me. "M-mr. Jeon?" I say, reverting into that more formal tone, having gone from one extreme to the other. 

"Come on Darling, you know better than that. Now what were you saying? Jungkook please? Please what Bun?" he says, stalking towards me and I can only open and close my mouth, losing my words from the shock of being caught. 

"What would you like me to do for you baby?" he says while sitting next to me, the bed dipping under his weight. He called me baby this time, he's never done that before, why is he doing this? What is he doing in here?

"Look at how cute you are. Confident enough to moan my name while I'm sleeping just a few doors down but now that you've been caught you can't even say a word. But you sounded so pretty Darling. Can you say it again for me?" he taunts, leaning in and placing a kiss under my ear. "Come on Bunny, I know you know how to use your words" he whispers in my ear, leaving me choking out a response. 

"P-please Jungkook" I say just barely above a whisper. "Please what Darling?" he says, ghosting his lips along the nape of my neck. "Please let me cum" I choke, tears now threatening to fall. The embarrassment and intensity of this moment being nothing like I had ever felt before. 

"Would you like me to help you cum Princess?" he ask, leaning back to look at me and I nod my head, a stray tear streaming down my cheek. "We don't have to do this if you don't want to. I can walk right out of here and we can pretend that nothing ever happened" he says, reassuring me that this is my choice. 

"Please help me cum" I plead, another tear falling and he cups my face and quickly wipes it away. 

"Lay down for me yeah?" he says in a hushed tone, kissing my forehead again and guides me back down onto the bed. I watch as he caresses my face again, studying my features before saying another word. 

"Can I kiss you Bunny?" he asks and I nod my head immediately. He leans down to kiss me but stops just short of letting our lips touch. "Use your words Darling" he says, his warm breath fanning across my lips and making me choke back a moan before saying 'yes' leaving him smiling against my lips before pressing them against mine.

This kiss is different than the one we shared before. It's more delicate, more sensual and it has my hips bucking up, begging for some friction. "Someone's needy now aren't they?" he taunts before kissing me again. "Can I take this off?" he questions, playing with the blanket I have covering me and I nod before letting go and he gets up only enough to push the blankets off of me.

His eyes drink in my form, trailing slowly up and down my body and leaves me clenching my thighs together, still frustrated from having my orgasm cut off. "You want me to touch you?" he asks, his cold fingers ghosting along my waist, leaving me shivering at the feeling. "Please" is all I can manage to choke out, overwhelmed and excited by what's to come. 

"Open your legs for me Princess" he says while guiding my legs apart and now tracing patterns on my stomach. "Were you just using your fingers baby?" he asks and I nod leaving him following the path my fingers once traveled. "Want me to use mine?" he continues and I nod again, taking in a sharp breath once he runs a finger through my folds. 

"Baby was all wet just thinking about me huh?" he says and I cover my face, too embarrassed to say anything. "Can I ask you a question Darling?" he says while he traces lazy patterns up and down my slit. "Y-yes" I whimper, pressing my head back against the pillow. 

"Did you hear me earlier today when I was in the shower?" he asks and I take my hands off of my face, looking at him like a deer in headlights shocked at the fact that he found out. 

"I noticed that you didn't bring your bags in from your car like you normally do and when I was walking out of my room I noticed that your door was open and your bags were already inside. Meaning that you were probably in the house before I first saw you. Isn't that right Princess?" he says before pushing a finger inside me.

"Yes" I moan, my back arching as he drags his fingers lazily along my folds, never having felt this before, never having been touched like this before. 

"Is that why you were acting so jumpy today? Were you thinking about how I was moaning your name in the shower? How I was saying I wanted you in there with me so bad? Were you listening when I said that Princess?" he says while easing another finger into me leaving me choking back a moan and letting tears fall down my face from all of the intense feelings I'm having all at once.

"Yes, fuck yes" I moan out when I feel him hit that spot inside me that I've never been able to reach. "You like that? You like it when I touch you like that?" he says now leaning down and biting my collar bone gently leaving me arching up into his touch. He licks the spot slowly, easing the slight pain and trails kisses down my breast. 

He looks up at me before he goes too far and glances down at my nipple that's right in front of him and looks back up at me wordlessly asking for my permission. "Yes Jungkook please" I groan out and he pushes his fingers in further dragging harder against my walls as he takes one of my nipples into his mouth. 

"You make such pretty noises Darling" he praises, switching over to the other nipple after having abused the first one, leaving it puffy and wet. I clench around his fingers in response, loving the way he's talking to me. 

"Does baby like getting praised? Do you like it when I tell you how pretty you look while you're under me?" he taunts and I clench around his fingers even harder while my back comes off the mattress, feeling myself getting closer to tipping over the edge. 

Babble out a slur of curses attached to his name, begging to cum and he chuckles dryly, enjoying the way my face contorts in pleasure. "That's it Bunny, just like that" he say, coaching me through it until I'm about to reach the edge and as I tip over I grab the back of his neck and pull him down, smashing his lips against mine, making him swallow my moans as I come undone. 

 His fingers don't falter for a second as he fucks me through my high and only stops when he hears me whining from overstimulation. "You did so well Princess" he says while brushing the tears off my face. "You did so good for me" he praises again and I hum in contentment, feeling myself start to drift off to sleep. 

He chuckles at the sight and goes into the bathroom and comes back to clean me up before picking me up and taking me into another guest bedroom so I can sleep on fresh sheets.

"Goodnight Bunny" he says, leaning down and placing a kiss on my forehead before slowly leaving the room and shutting the door behind him.

prev / next Series Masterlist

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[weenwrites]

Hii, long time lurker here! I love the way you write everybody so in character and feel free to ignore this, but could I request headcannons of the Autobots with an adrenaline junkie reader (I.e.skateboarding down steep roads, parkour, etc) who is actually really calm and philosophical? Always thinking about the nature of life regardless of how big or small?platonic please

[ Please do not repost, plagiarize, or use my writing for AI! Translating my work with proper credit is acceptable, but please ask first! ]

✎A/N: Hehe thank you!! Since it's been a hot second since I've last written something, I'll do 5 characters instead of my usual 3.

Optimus

He's certainly no stranger to thrill-seekers, though when you're pitted against cybertronian standards, all your hobbies and activities seem rather tame. Still, he understands that humans can be very fragile—it's a baffling conundrum to him, that humans are capable of surviving the wildest scenarios yet can die because of the smallest things. He'll often drop you off at a skate park and he'll always remind you to take proper caution and wear protective gear.

In the rare moments of downtime that he gets, (or if you join him on his patrols which always take place at ungodly hours of the day) he could go on for hours and hours discussing cybertronian and human philosophy with you. The differences and similarities in the way that humans and cybertronians interpret life and its meaning are very intriguing to him, and naturally he enjoys learning. Eventually it's pretty clear how much he looks forward to having you with him on patrol through the way he begins to conveniently go on patrol at more reasonable hours of the day.

Ratchet

He's scolded you countless times when you used your skateboard to grind down the railing instead of walking down from the catwalk normally. And he's also talked your ear off about skateboarding around his feet while he walks around. It's not really for being distracting but rather out of concern that you might fall and hit your head, sprain a joint, possibly break a bone, or he might step on you.

Chances are that no matter what he tells you, you're still gonna do what you do. Well regardless, he'll tell you to wear a helmet, elbow pads, knee pads—it doesn't matter how skilled you are, accidents can happen to anyone because of factors out of their control—and hey, don't forget wrist guards. When you fall, you naturally put your hands beneath you to catch yourself, so your hands and wrists mainly take the brunt of the damage.

He's not quite one for philosophical discussions, but you're welcome to idly talk to him about it, and occasionally he'll either agree with whatever philosophy you're talking about, or critique it and point out how absurd he thinks it is.

Ultra Magnus

What do you expect? He's about as fun as a wet sock. Skateboarding in the base is prohibited. Doing "parkour" around the base is prohibited. Do not scale the side of the monitor. Do not jump off the catwalk onto any passing bot. The list goes on and on for each new creative stunt you come up with. And somehow he has an uncanny knack for guessing where you've hidden up on the suspension beams overhead in the base, yet it's just the fact he has sharp eyes. He'll drive you out to a skate park or any public space if it means you'll stop doing it around the base.

He's not all too philosophical. That is to say, he's never had the opportunity nor the inclination to look into it for himself. However, the more you talk to him about it, the more he realizes that differences between Humans and Cybertronians only run skin-deep.

Despite being hundreds of thousands of light years apart, both Human and Cybertronian culture share some remarkable similarities. Back on Cybertron, no one existed for 'no reason'. Everyone had a purpose, they were assigned a role the moment they woke up, but on Earth? You choose that for yourself. Yet doesn't that seem daunting? To have to find purpose yourself? He dislikes the lack of "order" in that regard. Hm.

Smokescreen

To put it simply, he thinks you're super cool. Smokescreen idolizes you next to Optimus—it's not that you're in second place... You're technically first place in terms of human idols, so, yeah you've got that! See? You're second to none!

He likes watching you skateboard, or parkour your way up onto the top of a building. He genuinely thinks your hobbies are awesome and it'd be hard to miss the way you rub off on him. He'll try to show off and pull stunts of his own in hopes you'd think he's also cool. While you're out skateboarding in the middle of an empty parking lot he'll join you and do some donuts and weave between street lights as fast as he can, and by the end of it you always catch the way he looks at you, expecting some sort of reaction to gauge whether he was cool or not.

And not only are your hobbies cool but, to him you're righteous! He always listens intently whenever you go on about the inherent value of any and all life or any philosophical topics that spark your interest, but does he truly understand even a smidgen of what you're saying? Ehhh, sort of, but honestly it mostly goes straight over his head (which is amazing given his height). He essentially parrots what you say because he thinks it'll set him a bit closer to being just like one of his idols, but he doesn't truly understand the deeper meaning of your words and ideas.

Arcee

Skateboarding down steep roads, scaling tall buildings with just your bare hands, biking along bumpy and rocky paths, even though she's seen her fair share of shenanigans and trouble with Cliffjumper, you're ironically quite the handful despite your size. Ah, just what will she do with you?

At this point you've no doubt convinced her to go ride down some of the rough and rugged paths out in the desert. It's pretty dangerous, sure, but she'd be lying if she said she didn't find the challenging terrain fun in the slightest. She's confident in her own ability to keep you safe and she trusts you, so all you need to do is grab a helmet and the two of you are off!

When you both kick back to relax and chat, philosophy was one of the last things she thought you'd be interested in, but hey, humans are always full of surprises. Every discussion you have with her about philosophy always delves deeper into the more personal parts of both your lives, or on lighter notes it gets to talking about the interesting cultural differences between Humans and Cybertronians. Either way, when things get too deep or depressing, she's always quick to suggest going out for a drive to clear your mind.

[transgenderer]

So there's an octavia butler short story, the book of Martha, where God gives an author (closely patterned on butler herself, but possibly intentionally less creative) infinite(?) power to remake the world, to fix humanity and/or its problems before we destroy ourselves. After considering a variety of options (it's possible she's only allowed to modify human nature? But the story never stares that. Maybe she's just not good at considering all her options) she just gives everyone extremely pleasurable dreams. So they're less ambitious I guess. And in general have nicer lives

Anyway this story has stuck with me in two ways. The first: so, assume you're not just gonna like. Give humanity infinite resources or whatever. How do you make a utopia? Well to me the answer seems obvious, based on my experience of my own psyche. The human mind needs more affection. It's too easy for annoyance or some petty issue to overwhelm affection. And then we are cruel and selfish and all this stuff. Like. Idk, I feel like I've experienced moments of clear-eyed saintlihood. My brain produces that...outlook/emotion/whatever. But it won't stick there, of course. But it feels like it wouldn't be too far a jump to just get the human brain to stick there more easily. Still let us access other states, for variety. Give us some sense of others freedom or whatver, so our care for each other doesn't make us all busy bodies. But like. It would only take the tugging of a few chemical strings to fix human nature. A little less rage, a little more philia.

This is of course an important piece of evidence that if there is a god he doesn't love us. He could have made us full of lovingkindness. He could have made us not want to hurt and humiliate each other. But he didn't. Because all that nastiness helps us succeed in the social games that increase our mating frequency, or selectiveness, or whatever, presumably, and so selective descent with modification doomed us all forever. Or, God is real but cares about something else. Maybe beauty. Maybe he feels the glory of war is worth it.

But the second thing, is noticing which parts of our world feel like a Martha has already been there. I was looking at the sky on the train home today (hmabhrg! There was a William Blake exhibition), admiring it, and I was struck again by how...excessive, superfluous, overflowing, decadent, additional it is. The sky could just be a simple blue, fading evenly to black. Clouds could always be blobby and indistinct. We could all be congenital shortsighted, so they were always blurry. But instead they're just this part of the world, detached from all the specifics of earthly life, that is achingly beautiful, most nights! Sunsets are so beautiful it's cliche, it's boring! That feels like a gift from a Martha. Someone a bit uncreative trying to fix the world in a way that doesn't shake it up too much

[anneapocalypse]

What is "the occult" in FFXIV?

Ever since I first laid eyes on the EE3 bit about Urianger's parents I have been noodling on one thing in particular. Encyclopedia Eorzea volume 3 refers to "the occult" as Urianger's parents' field of study (and the reason they were so absent from his life). Every since that discovery, I have been curious what that actually means. What is "the occult" in a universe where magic is real, measurable, and a highly legitimate and prestigious field of study?

So, where else is "the occult" referenced in the game?

Thanks to this invaluable searchable transcript, I've found a few other references in MSQ.

The first use of the term "occult" in MSQ that I've found is way back in the Gridania starter quests when some Ixali "Occultists" are trying to summon Garuda at the Guardian Tree. In isolation I'd take this one with a grain of salt since it's very early in ARR, but I think it's consistent with other usages. The description for Whorleater Extreme also uses the term, referencing "the occult knowledge of the Ascians," so from the start there is an association of the occult with Ascian magicks and specifically with summoning.

The only other mention in MSQ comes from Alphinaud in Endwalker, where he and Krile are giving us the tour of Sharlayan, and specifically Phenomenon:

Alphinaud: As the center of what would later become the Studium, it was established to promote the study of aetherological phenomena, hence the name. Alphinaud: Though with aether being a fundamental aspect of nature, its scope expanded to include every conceivable facet of life and even the universe itself. Alphinaud: And then, in the four hundred and thirty-second year of the Sixth Astral Era, Phenomenon was decreed complete and the Studium officially opened as a place of learning. Alphinaud: With a long and storied history, it is without question the world's leading authority in aetherology, the arcane, the occult, astromancy, and countless other fields, standing proud as─ Alisaie and Krile: ...Sharlayan's foremost educational institute!

Okay, so "the occult" clearly falls within the general field of aetherological phenomena and magic, though that we could have guessed already. Something that catches my eye is how in more than one place, "occult" is contrasted with or referenced as distinct from "arcane." This is the case in Alphinaud's speech above, as well as in the Blue Mage quest "Everybody Was Fukumen Fighting," wherein Bluehood says, "No occult tricks or arcane incantations can contend with the all-surpassing might of blue wizardry!"

In the Loporrit Allied Society quests, we also get this odd little quest "Hare-Raising Thrills," in which we're asked to make "Occult Paraphernalia" for a Loporrit called Thrillingway. Depending on crafting job, dialogue with Keepingway will elaborate thus:

"It seems he requires a pair of shears─but not just any pair. No, he desires blades sharp enough to carve fur clean off!"

"He wants a sturdy coil of rope suitable for binding all four limbs of…a 'friend,' allegedly."

"Seems he wants a highly acidic gel for some dubious purpose I did not have the heart to inquire about. Honestly, I think it's best if we don't know."

Which. I mean. Okay. lol. Do what you will with that.

But probably most illuminating is the use of the word "occult" in a couple of Red Mage quests, and in the Sky Pirate raid quests.

In "The Weeping City," Cait Sith says, "Thus did the Mhachi magi construct an occult device that would more securely bind the voidsent to their will..."

And in the Red Mage quests "With Heart and Steel" and "Traced in Blood" we have, respectively:

"The tomes with passages pertaining to the voidsent Lilith are all forbidden occult works..."

and

"...the secrets behind Lambard's occult transformation."

In both contexts, "occult" seems to be connected to voidsent, specifically to Lilith in the case of the Red Mage quests.

And this ties back to the references in ARR as well, since from the beginning Ascians have been connected with the Void, even before we knew what the Void actually was. So it's safe to say at this point, I think, that "occult" can refer to magicks connected to the Void and to Ascians.

There's just one more reference I found that flummoxed me a bit, and that's this description of the Arcanist class, which refers to arcanist weapons as "occult grimoires." I found it odd initially because in most other contexts "occult" seems to refer to magicks seen as illicit, as opposed to the socially acceptable "arcane." But it does make a kind of sense, given that it is from Arcanist that we get Summoner. If summoning of primals is occult, then by extension so is summoning in the arcanist sense, even if it's not truly the same thing. This would seem to be the exception to "arcane" and "occult" being distinct categories, which leads me to believe that the distinction is more cultural than ontological.

So I think from the above, we can consider "occult" to be a fairly broad term that may be used in several distinct but overlapping senses:

Magic related to the summoning of primals.

Magic related to the Void, voidsent, and Ascians.

Magic which is taboo, forbidden, or otherwise outside of that which is socially accepted.

As a footnote, I think this is particularly interesting in the context of Urianger being introduced as our resident expert on primals, despite the fact that that's... really not specifically his field of study but merely adjacent to it. Urianger's primary interest is prophecy, and certainly plenty of prophecy seems to reference primals and Ascians and that's where we see him doing a lot of his research, but it's not the same field, merely overlapping.

Without more information we can't know for certain what his parents were actually studying. Maybe they were interested in primals, or Ascians, or the Void. Maybe they were studying Void-related magics. It's also possibly they were simply arcanists particularly interested in the summoner side and we shouldn't read much more than that into the reference to "the occult." Who knows.

But nonetheless, several of these interpretations would mean that in a way, Urianger has followed in their footsteps despite their making apparently little effort to guide him that way, which I find to be an interesting angle to his character and also profoundly sad in its own way--not that he found his own interests in those areas, but that the Augurelts had a child so naturally inclined toward their own interests and still took so little interest in him.

[hunterwritings]

𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘 𝐘𝐎𝐔, 𝐌𝐘 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋 | 𝐁𝐈-𝐇𝐀𝐍

summary: bi-han is only compliant with you, and you are the last one to realise it | gn!reader x bi-han, childhood friend! reader, flirty and joking! reader warnings: kinda suggestive at the end (?) notes: FINALLY WRITING SOMETHING AGAIN HALLELUJAH | this is very self-indulgent lol

Bi-han was not someone who enjoyed physical touch. Or any affection for that matter.

At least that's what everyone believed, considering how unwelcoming he was to everyone else. If it was talking about kombat, now that was different.

It was something first noticed by his brothers, Kuai Liang and Tomas. They would go to put their hand on his shoulder or pat him on the back and he would swat them away while muttering cold insults. They brushed it off, knowing that Bi-han had acted that way with everyone.

Until you came into the picture.

You had known the Lin Kuei brothers since you were young. You had trained with them, fought with them and grown with them since you were all children. You loved all of them, but something about Bi-han drew you in. How he was so cold and unimpressed with you and your jokes, it made you want to wittingly mess with him even more. You would always walk by his side, taunt him to the point of him wanting to throw a punch at you. You would never do anything to make him uncomfortable, just enough to see him roll his eyes at you and push your face away with his palm.

As you grew with him, some things changed with Bi-han. Your comical and witty nature stayed active throughout time and, in your eyes at least, Bi-han had the same attitude from when he was a child.

But he was different.

It was something people around you two noticed first. How instead of ignoring your witty jokes, he would critique them and say how you could do better than that. How instead of scooting away from you when you would sit unnecessarily close to him on the couch, he would let you sit inches away from him, even lying your head on his shoulder as you listened to him talk about battle plans. How instead of leaving you on the ground after he beats you in sparring, he would offer his hand to you with the same irritated look on his face.

You guess that it's never been something you thought of until Kuai Liang had spoken to you.

"Bi-han has never been so close to someone." He shakes his head with a smirk.

"I guess I never looked into it." You chuckled.

"Then it is clear to everyone except for you. I would not be surprised if he thought about proposing to you."

You nearly chocked on your own breath. "Proposing? That's moving a bit fast don't you think?"

"Well, I suppose that's what Bi-han does." He smiles. "He moves in black and white, it is all or nothing for him. And when he learns to accept his feelings for you, he will make a move before anyone else does."

"How do I know this isn't just some hunch you have?" You crossed your arms and jokingly raised an eyebrow at him. He chuckled.

"I've known Bi-han my entire life and he has never been so compliant with someone, I am certain." He says.

You were a bit dumbstruck by his blunt words. Your love for Bi-han was obvious to everyone else, you wanted to make it obvious as you grew more jokingly flirty with him as time went on. As you began to look at things in retrospect, you notice how Bi-han had been more lenient with you throughout time. Oh my gods, have you been so blind this whole time? Has Bi-han tried to subtly tell you how he felt throughout his actions? Now you were overthinking.

You wanted to speak with Bi-han and see if you could get him to admit something to you. You sought him out throughout the temple, stopping when you found him in an empty training room, using a stick to practice his attacks. He halted his movements the second he saw you enter the room.

"Sorry to interrupt." You chuckle as you walk closer to him. He just raised an eyebrow at you as you approached.

"Is it something you want?' He asks, you now standing in front of him.

"Perhaps."

"Well get on with it." He says as he continues his training movements as you walked around him and pressed your back against the wall.

"I've just been thinking a lot."

"That's new." He wittingly jokes, causing a laugh to emit from your lips. A smirk appeared on his face at the sound of your laughter, that caught your eye.

"You think you're very funny, but that's my job." You smile. "Bi-han." The sound of his name from your lips caused him to stop his fighting movements. He went to turn towards you, but you quickly wrapped your arms around his waist, pressing your chest to his sweaty back. You felt his cold hand press against yours wrapped around his torso. "I really enjoy being around you." You softly admitted.

Bi-han felt like his heart stopped, when in reality it was beating quite fast from what you could feel. Bi-han was used to quick and small touches from you in a joking flirty sense, but he could tell that you were trying your best to be serious. He never thought that your feelings for him would go anything past platonic.

He pulls your hands off of him so he can turn and face you. Your face was different from your usual relaxed, this time your eyebrows contorting in anxiousness, wondering if you had just ruined your relationship with him. Bi-han was a bit dumbfounded, wondering how to continue this conversation. So he took a chance.

He leaned into you and pressed his lips gently against yours. He quickly pulled away, only a few inches to scan your face and wonder if he made a mistake. When he feels your hands on his cheeks, he immediately drops the stick in his hand, hearing the wood hit the floor as he reached his arms low and grabs a hold of your legs and picks you up as his lips stay on yours. You feel your back hit the wall as his cold hands stayed on your thighs, gripping tightly.

You pull away for a moment to catch your breath, your eyes darting to every detail of his face.

"How long have you been wanting to do that?' You chuckle, pressing your forehead against his. You could practically feel his eyes roll back in his head. "Shut up." He shakes his head before his lips are on yours once again.

Bi-han is a very serious man, he takes things in his life very seriously. Even before you had told him how you felt, he would go to the ends of the earth to protect you and keep you safe. Now that you were officially his, not only would he be even more protective of you, he would boast about it to everyone around him. He would let everyone know that you chose him and it would feel like the greatest achievement of all time to him. Whether it be from the sounds people would hear through the walls at night or how he now walks with your arm wrapped around his bicep, he will make sure everyone knows that you're his.

And Kuai Liang wasn't wrong, within a few weeks of your confessions, Bi-han brought up the idea of proposal to you. How could you deny the grumpy grandmaster himself?

[starboye]

pairing: joe goldberg x male reader

request: can you write for penn badgely/joe goldberg , basically joe is obsessed with reader and has been stalking him for months. he decides to go talk to reader and drugs him by offering a coffee and kidnaps him and puts him in the glass cage. You can do the rest :)

warnings: angst, yandere!joe, possessive, dark themes, mentions of sex, pervert things, masturbation mentions, kidnapping, dr***ing, cursing, stalking, and natural joe things, jealousy, mentions of forced marriage

i'd be minimizing it if i said joe was obsessed with you,no he fully wanted to have you to himself, seeing you with any other man was like torture, he thought of the ways to get you like maybe kidnapping you but that would be to blunt, or what if he knocked you out and dragged you to his house, no that would be to obvious.

he's been watching you for months now, watching the way you act and the things you do to get and idea of who you are and who he wants you to be, you knew him as your neighbor for a couple of months but he knew everything about you, setting up little camera in your house when you're gone to watch you.

or stalking you everywhere you went to make sure you weren't talking to any other guys, and trust if he ever saw you talking to a guy he'd make that man pay with his life for even coming near his beautiful man, but he never came close to you ever, to nervous of how he could mess it up.

but now when he sees you at a coffee shop and over hears you talking about moving his heart drops to the floor knowing his dear y/n could be leaving forever and he couldn't lose you like that so he approached you "hey y/n, right" he asked already knowing the answer "oh hi, who are you" you asked startled by his presence making his heart drop even more, you didn't even know his name?!

"i-i'm joe i'm your neighbor" he says holding out a hand for a shake "oh nice to meet you" you smile shaking his hand "fuck fuck fuck what do i do" joe thought to himself finally touching you after moths of stalking, this time actually awake and not under him sleeping but that's a story for another day "so i hear you're gonna be moving soon" he says with a awkward chuckle.

"yeah i'm gonna be moving more down south" you smile "cool cool" joe says thinking of how he could get you to stay before offering you tea at his place "hey wanna come over to my place for some drinks as like a farewell, you know it'll be really sad to see you leave the neighborhood" joe asks but was praying to the man above that you would say yes.

"yeah sure why not" you agree "yeah okay let me grab my things really quick" joe says chill on the outside but on the inside he was cheering with joy as he grabs his stuff and walks you to his house "welcome to my humble abode" he says walking you in and setting his stuff down "wow it's really nice" you chuckle awkward, and he could see how uncomfortable you were.

"want a drink i've got everything" joe offers "yeah can i just get a water, also where's your bathroom i gotta pee really bad" you laugh "up the stairs and to the right" joe says as he gets some water for you before noticing the sleeping pill on the counter and getting an idea to put you to sleep and keep you to himself.

he grabs the pill and is about to put it in the water but second guesses himself thinking this isn't a good idea and that its wrong but with the sound of the toilet flushing and your foot steps getting closer he throws the pill into the water and watches it dissolve quickly "here's your water" he says sliding it to you "thanks" you say drinking the water all the way.

joe watches you with curious eyes as you drink before setting the glass down "so where do you plan on moving" joe asks walking you to the living room and sitting down on the couch, you joining him "uhm its gonna be somewhere in texas probably" you say as you begin to get droopy and joe watches you closely as your eyes fall shut and you go to sleep.

"fuck yes" joe mutters to himself picking you up and walking you into his basement where there's a large glass cage standing, like a cage for an animal but now just for his lovely husband, he walks in and set you onto the bed before kneeling beside you, admiring your sweet body and your beautiful features and how could he resist getting a few touches in or maybe even just a little kiss, just a sweet innocent kiss on his unconscious neighbor who he kidnapped.

he leans over and lightly kisses your lips feeling you jolt under him a little as he does so "that has to be a sign right" joe thinks to himself as he walks out of the cage and locks it shut, soon you wake up, groggy and not knowing where you are "hello my beautiful" joe says walking closer to the glass to watch you "where am i" you ask getting up from the bed.

"in your new home" joe says with a creepy smile "what the fuck does that mean" you ask starting to internally freak out "it means me and you are gonna spend the rest of our little lives together" he say watching your every move "you let me out of the cage right fucking now" you yell slamming your fist against the glass "don't even try, this glass wont break" he says giving the glass a little knock.

"who the fuck even are you" you ask starting to freak out "im gonna be your new husband obviously y/n" joe says "how do you know my name" you question "well i've been watching you for quite some time now, ever wonder why some things go missing in your house well its because i keep them nice and safe for you" he says pulling back a table cloth to reveal your things you thought you lost.

it was from little things like your hair clip or your tooth brush to your clothes like your underwear which had seemed to be stained with some white substance seemingly joes cum "you're fucking psycho" you scoff "for you baby always, why do you think ive been watching you for so long, you belong with me and i belong with you" joe says putting some photos up to the glass.

pictures of you sleeping from multiple night or pictures of you showering, and even one of you just the night before but from... inside your house "what the fuck" you mummer "i love you baby and i think you love me too" joe says before walking to the door "now get some rest we have a big day tomorrow" joe says "for what" you ask with a shaky breath "our wedding obviously silly i have your suit and everything" joe smiles before shutting off the lights.

you were in fact never gonna get out of this.

taglist: @mailmango @spermeboy @ghostking4m @gayaristocrat @addictedtomalepits @staarb0y @crispysoup318 @its-ares @gargoylesworld09

©starboye productions

[wilhelminyard]

part 3 of the foxes being brutally honest and insulting people to their faces because they are SAVAGES

NEIL :

"I figured he was an egocentric maniac who was so desperate for his own glory he refused to see the potential in anyone else"

"tell me you're not that stupid"

"I might have been a little more considerate if I'd known how stupid you are"

"you being an asshole at heart means I was right about your chances. you do understand by now that your cowardice is what's keeping you and andrew apart, right?"

"you're a spineless asshole. you let the world happen to you and don't bother to fight back. you let other people dictate how you can live your life and who you can spend your time with. remind me why you put up with your mother's abuse for so long. did you actually love her despite her madness, or were you just too afraid to walk away?"

"what do you think?" "I think fuck you"

"your false bravado helps no one" "neither does your cowardice"

"you already walked away from him once knowing what riko would do to him in your absence. don't do it again. if you don't protect him now, his death is on you"

"die free or die a failure. the choice is yours."

"I'd ask you how it feels but I guess you've always known what it's like to be second, you worthless piece of shit"

ANDREW :

"is your learning curve a horizontal line?"

"a privileged child like you has never seen the real world"

"I've had enough of your stupidity to last me a week"

"I'm volunteering my opinion" "don't. children should be seen and not heard"

"you're stupider than even I gave you credit for"

"you have a problem wherein you only invest your time and energy into worthless pursuits"

"you're a different kind of suicidal. didn't you figure that out in december? you're bait. you're the martyr no one asked for or wanted"

"I hope you two are miserable together"

WYMACK :

"anyone have ideas on how to make neil look a bit less like a battered wife?"

"I can't tell if you're being obtuse to fuck with me or if you're really that dumb."

"I need you to derail that one-track fucking mind of yours for two seconds"

"great. kevin's turning into another you. that's just what I needed."

"get washed up before your stench kills me"

KEVIN :

"we need you on the court but not if you're going to drag us down with you. in the shape you're in right now you'd be a complete waste of our time."

"even if you'd stepped it up when I told you to a year ago, you would have no chance of beating them. there is nothing at all you can do this late in the year. they are better than we are and they always will be"

"stop acting like a spoiled child"

"you've got a thing for controversial teams, I think, but I like this one much better than the last one" "they're mediocre at best but they're easier to get along with"

NICKY :

"do you get off on being such a debbie downer?"

AARON :

"it wasn't the drugs that made him crazy"

"I'm walking away and pretending I don't know you"

"I want to drink and pretend I don't know any of you"

MATT :

"good to see you're still fuck-all crazy"

"one of these days you have to let me hit kevin."

ALLISON :

"you are on messed-up child. you come by that naturally or did your parents do that to you?"

"seriously you guys? it's like you don't know us" "we try not to"

RENEE :

"I tried taking you off his hands at one point. andrew refused on the grounds he wouldn't wish you on anyone except a mortician"

[lizhly-writes]

hi here's my oc who's now participating in my weird liu qingge/shang qinghua fake dating au i guess

Liang Yuwen was weird for a Bai Zhan disciple.

She was okay at fighting, but she was... fussy. Delicate and prissy and she pouted and cried whenever anyone tried to make her do anything she didn't want to do. Sometimes, Liu Qingge wondered how she even got on Cang Qiong in the first place. It was hard to imagine her as an initiate digging holes in the dirt when she got upset if a little mud got on her clothes.

In any case, Liu Qingge didn't really like her. He'd rather spend his time with almost literally anyone else.

She had, however, romanced her chosen An Ding disciple with such success that everyone was still talking about it.

"How did you do it," Liu Qingge said.

Liang Yuwen stared at him, eyes wide and round and soft. "How did I do what, Da-shixiong?"

"Your An Ding disciple--"

"Oh!" Liang Yuwen said, cutting him off, and then she started talking. She did a lot of talking. She in fact cheerfully ignored any of Liu Qingge's attempts to get a word in edgewise in favor of focusing on her Jiang-shixiong and how handsome he was and she was going to marry him and have three children and a big house and Liu Qingge didn't care about any of this.

"I meant," Liu Qingge ground out, when Liang Yuwen stopped talking for more than two seconds. "The paperwork."

"The paperwork," Liang Yuwen echoed, with a questioning tilt of her head.

"You did three weeks of An Ding paperwork."

"Oh, that," Liang Yuwen said. "I'm sorry, I wasn't sure what you meant! There's a lot of paperwork I go through, you know? But you meant Jiang-shixiong's paperwork. You're asking how I did that?"

Liu Qingge grunted his assent.

"Well, I found this one little thing immensely helpful. It's called 'paying attention in class', which happens to be an opportunity that can be undertaken any time there's class. You know, everyday. But I don't think I've ever seen you in class, actually?"

"If you're just making fun of me--"

"Now, there's no need to be so serious!" Liang Yuwen giggled. "I'm simply making a point that education is important! It's a necessity for taking over the duties of an An Ding disciple! Teaching classes, attending meetings, doing negotiations, that kind of thing."

Liu Qingge stared at Liang Yuwen. Liang Yuwen stared back, easy smile on her lips.

"It wasn't just paperwork," Liu Qingge said, sinking feeling in his stomach.

Liang Yuwen laughed. "What, did you think that was all I did? Just paperwork wouldn't have been nearly as impressive! But I'd imagine you'd have a harder time of it, wouldn't you? Jiang-shixiong's an inner disciple, Shang-shixiong's a head disciple -- taking over his duties would be much more intensive, wouldn't it?"

Shang Qinghua had mentioned something like this when they were discussing whether or not Liu Qingge should make a big, dramatic show of affection. He'd immediately dismissed it, convinced that there was no way Liu Qingge could ever handle what Shang Qinghua went through.

"Are you trying to make an effort?" Liang Yuwen said, soft and sympathetic. "Why is that? Is Shang-shixiong losing interest? Well, I suppose that's only natural. I can't imagine you've ever even made an attempt at making his life easier!"

She laughed again. Liu Qingge was struck with the sudden urge to punch her in the face.

[ppumeonae-bigvibe]

the space between us

↖ navigation: enhypen masterlist || main masterlist

pairing: delinquent! jake x bookworm, gn! reader

↬ tags: slice of life with opposite attracts, can be considered as platonic or romantic relationship!, imo it's a good read (with no ending boohoo), finally finished watching love next door and its always friends to lovers that get me

summary: jake and you share a relationship so effortless that it’s hard to tell if it's deep friendship or something more

word count: 1.09k

prologue:

jake fell for you so naturally.

like the sun rising in the day and the moon chasing after it at night. like the seasons flowing and ebbing from one to another.

jake loves you like it's breathing. it wasn't difficult; it was practically second nature to him to seek you out wherever he went, second nature to have you with him.

though his pride and ego wasn't going to let him confess anytime soon, he revels deeply in the fact that you were always by his side, that you were always going to be giving him your fullest attention no mater what.

jake would choose you a hundred times over, in any lifetime.

----

"give me your physics worksheet."

like clockwork, you wordlessly slide your file folder over to jake, who sat down noisily at his seat. "you look worse for wear." you lightly commented, not bothering to give him your fullest attention as he languidly takes out his stationery and workbook.

outside, the sun had just started to make its appearance; the warmth from the rays outside indicating the start of a school day.

"yesterday, i stayed out a little longer to play online games with another group of friends; you know them. i wish you were there with me, but you're always studying. anyways, it's kinda surprising my parents hadn't said anything when i got home." even though you hadn't asked, jake provided context, just as he always did.

you never did minded his restless ramblings, and often times you knew he just sought a space to talk.

you hummed in response, preparing your desk for the first class, "yeah, that's because i told your parents that you were revising at mine." that lie you spun to his parents was one well prepared and rehearsed. not to forget, used very often.

"you're a lifesaver. did your parents question anything?" jake glanced sideways at you while flipping to the next page, no doubt to transcribe over whatever you calculated last night.

you shook your head, "they weren't home yesterday. i can't be covering for you all the time, you know?" wagging your fingers at him, jake appeared like a little puppy in front of you and you silently laughed at that image in your head.

"i know. too bad, i guess." jake shoots you a grin, earning him a hard smack from you.

----

"there you are. i've been finding you everywhere, literally all over the school." jake dramatically huffs and puffs at the door of the clubroom, not caring about the other pairs of eyes staring at back him momentarily. you felt heat seep from the center of your body towards the back of your neck and held back a groan at his sudden intrusion.

"jake, i'm in the middle of club activities..." you sighed. your club members were used to jake's antics, not batting an eyelid as they resumed with the issue at hand. he leaned his weight against the door frame, waiting for you to reply to him. you rolled your eyes at the way his face scrunched up in disgust, getting up from your seat to shoo him away.

"what are you doing here?!" you shoved him, no remorse in the way jake hunched over from your push, "hey! i was just reminding you that i'll be waiting for you after your activity-thingy ends. i'm bored playing games with the same people that aren't you."

you rolled your eyes at the way his face scrunched up in disgust, "yeah. i know." you hurriedly nudged him away, "go, go. we're trying to do something here." you tried and failed to hide the smile on your face and he mirrors your action.

"clearly someone appreciates me being here more than they let on. don't be late!" jake goofily salutes you, spinning on his heel and leaving. as soon as he left, everyone cast their gaze (full of mirth and surely humor) over to you as you re-entered the room and you bowed your head in apology, "sorry for the disruption everyone. we can get back to the discussion."

----

"gah...it's so hot!" jake slumps over at his desk, fanning himself with a worn out textbook, the bent shape definitely due to the number of times he's thrown it into his bag pack carelessly. he lightly tugs your forearm, "let's skip self-revision session and go for some ice cream. please?"

"i'm tryna do something here jakey. in a minute, yeah?" you gently pried his sweaty palm off you, totally focused on completing your assignment. you don't catch the way his ears tinge red at the tone of your voice. "okay. in a minute." he repeats your words, crossing and uncrossing his legs beside you.

the classroom was left with a few students revising for the upcoming test and of course, where you were, jake had to be there too.

he leans in close to you, warm breath tickling your ears, "are you done yet?" you flicked his forehead, "i will be if you stop bothering me." jake mimics a zipper over his mouth and puts his head back down on the table. a few times, you caught him fidgeting aimlessly beside you and with the same gentleness, you coaxed him to doing some sort of revision, though you were pretty sure he didn't want to.

he waits and waits: the moment your book flips close, jake perks up, "let's go!" he drags you up and out of your desk against your consent and you laughed at his antics, "yeah, yeah let's get going."

----

epilogue:

"hey, are you and jake a thing or...?"

you jerked up right at your friends question with an eyebrow raised sky high, "does it look like that to you?"

your friend shrugs, "y'all banter like lovers, yet somehow act like siblings. you two are always joined at the hip, even if it's going to the toilet together. he's stood up for you many times, and you have covered for him just the same."

your friend stares daggers into your soul, before leaning back against the creaky school chairs, "you're hiding something, aren't you?"

your silence goes noticed by your friend and almost immediately, "WAIT. do you like sim jaeyun, yes or no?!"

"i...we never put a label on our friendship. we do almost everything together, it would be weird to do it with someone else! i just...i just wanna be with him, you know?" you attempted to clarify, but with the way you were turning pink, your credibility went down as your friend cackled loudly beside you, "someone's in love~!"

@ppumeonae-bigvibe 's work ; likes and reblogs are appreciated <3

[in1-nutshell]

Can the tfa bots and elite guard react to a female bot who has the personality and appearance of fluttershy from my little pony who was bring to life by an allspark fragment

Okay, its been a hot second since I've seen My Little Pony, but worth it! Buddy is here with their animal friends ready to meet Team Prime and the Elite Guard.

Hope you enjoy!

Team Prime and the Elite guard reacting to a Fluttershy Bot Buddy that was brought to life by a fragment of the Allspark

SFW, platonic, Cybertronain/ Bot reader

TFA

Buddy’s alt-mode is golf cart. It was Team Prime who found Buddy. Well, more like Prowl and Sari who found them. Buddy was talking to the geese in the lake. Prowl was the first to make his and Sari’s presence known. Buddy shyly introduced themselves and asked if the two of them knew anything about the geese. Later the rest of Team Prime comes in to meet the new bot. It takes a few days to gain the bots friendship, but they seem happy to make such nice friends. Then the Elite Guard comes in…

Optimus Prime

“You’re a good friend Optimus. I’m glad I met you, my friend.”--Buddy

“Thank you, Buddy.”--Optimus

“Are you okay?”--Buddy

Voice crack “I’m fine.”--Optimus

Optimus needs good friends in his life.

Not like Sentinel or Elita-One/ Blackarachnia. They lost their rights to be Prime’s friends.

He has a good friendship with Buddy. Optimus has respect for Buddy as they treat everyone with equality and the same level of kindness. Something that not many people or bots have now a days.

Where was Buddy his entire life?

The only thing that does get on Optimus’s nerves with Buddy is that they want to adopt every animal they see without an owner. He has lost count of how many stray cats and squirrels he has found in their room.

He has no problem standing up for Buddy when they need it. He knows better than to fight others battles. But if Buddy needs the help, Optimus has their back. He does have talks with them about setting their own boundaries and being able to say ‘no’.

Will not hesitate to go out on someone if they make Buddy feel like they aren’t a true Cybertronian. He offers a confidence booster to Buddy if they feel like this, while also plotting against the attacker. Optimus does not care if the attacker is a Bot or human, they are going down.

Ratchet

“Hello there Doctor Ratchet. I cleaned some of your medical tools for you last night and organized them all just the way you like them!”--Ratchet

Need to adopt intensifies.

Oh, he is really considering it,

Ratchet has a soft spot for the younger bots on the team. Buddy is no exception to this.

Buddy’s quiet nature goes along well with Ratchet own quiet nature. Its just introverts being introverts. After his experience with Wreck-Gar, he defiantly has a bit more patience with Buddy.

Ratchet will not hesitate to hurt anyone who hurts Buddy. Whether it be physical or emotional, he has his throwing wrenches ready.

He doesn’t lecture Buddy as much as the rest of the team, but he does take time to talk to them about setting boundaries and saying ‘no’. Ratchet does get worried that one day Buddy isn’t going to say ‘no’ to something that would end up hurting them.

He is going to rain down a whole army on the sorry bot or human who calls Buddy a ‘fake Cybertronian’. Buddy is just as much of a Cybertronain than its inhabitants. Ratchet gives them a mini pep talk about it not mattering whether being a ‘fake’ or not, they are Buddy, one of the best Bots he has had the pleasure of knowing in his life.

Bumblebee

“Hey Buddy! Help me put these boosters on my back!”--Bumblebee

“Umm… that seems a little bit dangerous…”--Buddy

“C’mon please!”--Bumblebee

“… I guess if you use them responsibly…”—Buddy

Oh, he was definitely taking advantage of Buddy’s inability to say ‘no’ at first.

All Bumblebee had to do was sic the puppy dog eyes and a couple of ‘pleases’ and it was done. It isn’t until he gets a reality check from his team that he realizes that what he is doing is a bit messed up.

So, he does try to make up for it.

Mainly in the form of inviting them out to do more outings with him and Sari. But he soon gets the hint that Buddy doesn’t like big, crowded places, he offers Buddy to play video games as an alternative.

With time Bumblebee does try and get Buddy out of their shell. He makes sure they are fine with it first; he doesn’t want to overwhelm them too much. Just taking baby steps first.

He is willing to stand up against anyone who makes Buddy feel uncomfortable and fight them. He does try and help them in saying ‘no’.

He is ready to fight anyone if he hears that Buddy feels bad about being a ‘fake Cybertronian’. He is giving the weirdest pep talk that strangely works and helps Buddy’s self-esteem. Afterwards Bee and Sari are planning on how to make the human or Bots week miserable.

Sari

“Hello there Sari.”--Buddy

“Hey Buddy! You ready for Bird Time?”--Sari

“I thought you’d never ask.”—Buddy

Sari like Bee, definitely used the puppy dog eyes trick but not as much. Mainly to get out of little troubles here and there.

She does get a talk about it like bee though. But unlike Bee she gets a whole new idea.

Sari becomes Big Sister.

She is protective of the Big Little sibling. She feels like she has a special bond with Buddy. Anyways she always wanted to be a sister.

She instated a tradition between the two called Bird Time. Every week or so the two of them would go back to the pond and feed the geese while talking about their weeks. Sari loves Buddy’s empathetic nature and supportiveness. This was especially important when she learned about her not being human.

Like Bee, Sari is willing to fight someone who makes Buddy uncomfortable. Does not matter who it is, no one is coming near her little big sibling. She does have a habit of answering ‘no’ for Buddy when the situation seems fishy.

Sari honestly sympathizes with Buddy when they get called a ‘false Cybertronian’. Being a techno organic she understands that there are a lot of people and bots that will look at them differently. But that does not mean she will be plotting murder behind Buddy’s back. She teams up with Bee to make the person or Bots week miserable.

Bulkhead

“Good morning Bulkhead.”--Buddy

“Oh, hey Buddy…”--Bulkhead

“What’s wrong?”--Buddy

“Well… what do you think of my latest art piece? It’s probably dumb—what are you doing?”--Bulkhead

“I’m going to put this piece of art in my room.”—Buddy

This is Bulkhead’s best friend.

They are practically twins.

Many have mistaken their nature for twins. Which is something that both deep down find endearing and wish it were true.

Buddy never makes Bulkhead feel useless brute that’s only good for smashing things. Buddy does their best to support the things Bulkhead is passionate about.

Bulkhead in return does his best to stand up against anyone who is mean or makes Buddy feel uncomfortable.

Like Buddy he has a tough time saying no to certain things, but is much more honest in saying it and tries to help Buddy when they need it.

He is ready to pound anyone to the ground if he ever finds out Buddy doesn’t feel like a ‘true’ Cybertronian because someone says so. He does a lot of paintings of Buddy and tells them that they are as true Cybertronian as he is and that anyone who says otherwise is dumb. Bulkhead will have a grudge on any bot or human who says anything mean about Buddy.

Prowl

“Hello Prowl.”--Buddy

“Buddy.”--Prowl

“… I brought them in…”--Buddy

“Let me see.”--Prowl

Little meows

“Perfect.”—Prowl

Nature friends.

Prowl loves nature and Buddy loves animals.

The two of them like to walk around the park or go to Dinobot island to escape the city and enjoy nature. Buddy has made friends with all the Dinobots which makes Prowl happy.

The two of them have their own version of Bird Time. Except it involves staying still and seeing how many birds can land on them as much as possible. Buddy so far holds the record with 27 birds.

But there is a little snag in their friendship.

It involves training.

Buddy hates the idea of hurting anyone in any way shape or form. Prowl does it for self-defense or when it’s needed. He often tries to get Buddy to train with him, but it usually ends up with Buddy bringing animals into his room and watching him train.

Prowl still tries to get Buddy to at least know something, but that mission is still on going.

Does not hesitate a nanosecond if someone is making Buddy feel uncomfortable and will verbally destroy them if they even think about being mean to Buddy. Does talk to Buddy about the importance of saying no and setting boundaries.

Prowl is ready to throw shuriken’s as soon as he hears about someone making Buddy feel bad about their origins. He talks to Buddy about it no mattering how they got made, what matters is who they are. They are his friend, they are their own bot and that’s all that matters. May or may not have slashed someone/ somebots tires.

Jazz

“So, how long have you’ve been here?”--Jazz

“I was born last month.”--Buddy

“… You want to take a drive around?”—Jazz

Oh, he loves Buddy’s vibe.

They are a breath of fresh air compared to being 5 minutes around Sentinel. He sees someone who has so much kindness and empathy that he knows it is a gift. He doesn’t know too many bots that have that anymore since the war.

Jazz gets to know about Buddy from their hang outs and from talking to Prowl. He likes asking Prowl about Buddy’s favorite places to visit so he knows where the two of them could hang out when he has time. When Jazz can he likes walking with Buddy about anything under the sun. From the latest gossip in the Elite Guard, to his hobbies, music tastes, etc.

Jazz stands up to anyone who is being mean or making Buddy feel uncomfortable. Most times though he would take Buddy physically out of the company of the offender. No one has time to deal with rude people. He does try and talk to Buddy about the power of saying no while still being the kind bot they are and how important boundaries are.

Jazz would be speechless if he ever heard Buddy talk about someone calling them ‘inferior’ for not being a ‘true’ Cybertronian. He’ll take Buddy out on a walk while talking to Buddy about how people being mean because they don’t have anything better to do than cause misery to people who are living life by their rules. Definitely shares with Buddy a comfort playlist before leaving. Teams up with Prowl to find the bot or person who made Buddy feel bad.

Jetfire and Jetstorm

“Buddy! Buddy! Buddy!”—Jetfire and Jetstorm

“Hello there—whoa!”--Buddy

“We missed you!”—Jetfire and Jetstorm

The twins love spending time with Buddy.

Not only does it mean that they get to skip some of their chores, but they get to have fun too. Buddy offers some of the best places to fly and great places to observe some of Earth’s great nature phenomena. The twins sometimes like to combine into Safeguard to give Buddy a ride above the ground to look at earth.

They do use the puppy dog eyes sometimes, but they don’t abuse it too much. Only on harmless things like staying up a little bit more to continue playing video games with Bumblebee.

They don’t hesitate to get Buddy out of a harmful situation. Maybe flare up their powers a bit as a warning. They act like Buddy’s bodyguards when things get hairy.

They get angry when Buddy mentions that someone told them that they were a ‘real’ Cybertronian. They want names immediately. They do try to distract Buddy from feeling down by cracking jokes to make them forget about that feeling again.

Sentinel Prime

“So, this thing has a fragment of the Allspark?”--Sentinel

“They’re name is Buddy.”--Optimus

“Well just hold them down so we can extract—”--Sentinel

“NO!”—Everyone

Yeah, that’s right he wanted to crack Buddy open just to get the Allspark fragment and call it a day. No one is letting Sentinel anywhere near Buddy after what he said. He has tried pulling the Prime card, but that means nothing here.

Buddy, since they did not hear this, does try to make friends with him. They just want everyone to get along, where’s the damage in that? They are a bit confused in why so many of their friends are so against them even being a couple feet from Sentinel.

The rare times that he does get with Buddy are filled with him undermining them and proud fully boasting about his achievements. Yes, he is defiantly one of the Bots who calls Buddy a ‘fake’ Cybertronian. But these are short times since Buddy’s friends are never too far when Sentinel is around.

All the talking does do a number on Buddy’s confidence and self-esteem thinking they aren’t a true Cybertronian

Sentinel better run and hide because the second that Buddy lets loose that they think that way about themselves and it was caused by Sentinel.

Nothing on this planet or Cybertron is going to stop the war path buddy’s friends are going to be on.

[writingsfromstarfleet]

[Spock] The Other Kirk

♫ - Spring Day - BTS

A/N: Hello! I think I've written something similar before, honestly I don't remember, but if anyone is still reading these or is still here, enjoy! Hugs! x

for @lovinghufflepuffgirl <3

fem! pronouns (she/her) :)

Growing up, Iowa was life in the fast lane, and things were always constantly moving. The Kirk's were a well-known family, whether it was for your father, Lieutenant George Kirk, and his work in Starfleet, or it was your brother, Jim Kirk, and his truanting and general misbehaviour. America was entirely different to space, and you quickly found that out on your first assignment in Starfleet. 

Life on the Enterprise was definitely different to normal life. There were people of different races, species, genders; you name it, it was here. All beings from outer space worked together towards one common goal and it was a close community aboard the ship. You yourself, were human. From Riverside, Iowa on Earth, you were the sister of the Captain, and that didn't really make life too simple. 

Despite the difference, your brother stuck up for you no matter what, whether it was earth or the academy, it didn't matter. You were his pride and joy, and he would protect you with his life. 

By nature, your brother Jim was loud, obnoxious and confident. There never really was anything he wouldn't do, the man had confidence built from steel. You guessed that's what came from being the Captain. You were the polar opposite of him. Quiet as a whole, you kept your books and studies to yourself, always picking a small, closed off corner of the mess hall to sit in. Most people talked to you in relation to your brother, never really anything else. But, you weren't too offended. 

There was always someone a little different, though; Spock.

Your brothers first officer, Spock was always by his side, or on the bridge as acting captain. But, on the semi-rare occasion he wasn't, Spock tended to join you in the corner without much being said between you. In a way, you quite enjoyed it. It was a mutual understanding; you knew he didn't always favour talking, and so a simple smile and a nod of acknowledgement before you both delved back to your datapads and meals, was enough.

This pattern developed over time, and you found yourself sat with him more and more. Conversations started to naturally come between you, and before long, you were learning more and more about him, as he was you. One day, was different, it was still the same old routine, but the conversation was different.

"Good evening, Y/N," Spock started, placing his pad and drink down on the table. "How are you doing?"

"Hi Spock, I'm doing well, thank you, I'm a little stressed out over this, but other than that, it's good." Spock saw your face, brows furrowed but still trying to maintain your usual polite smile. "How are you?"

"I am well, thank you. Perhaps I can help you with that." 

Spock spun his pad round and sat down next to you for the first time. Usually, he was less personal and more formal, tending to always sit across from you. But this time, Spock chose the seat next to you instead. You suddenly felt nervous, though you had no real reason to be. Spock took your pad from you, fingers brushing delicately across your own for a second. Though it was only that second, the feeling lingered for a while. Spock stared at you for a moment, and quickly diverted his eyes down. If you hadn't known any better, you'd say his cheeks went a little red. 

"What is it you need help with?" he asked, voice low.

"I just don't understand any of it, I'm trying my best but I can't make sense of what feels like a thousand pages of writing." 

Spock sat with you for nearly two hours, explaining and writing and helping you where he could. It felt like he had been there all night, and as he spoke and talked you through everything paragraph by paragraph, eventually, it started to sink in and you began to understand. Even being Vulcan, Spock could not hide the pride on his face and a small smile after you explained the study back to him. 

"Well done, Y/N, I am impressed." His voice was different, and it sounded happy. His tone and smile told you that.

"You're smiling, you must be proud," you laughed out, and quickly got nervous again. "I, uh, didn't mean it like that if I offended you or-"

"Do not worry, I am proud. You have managed to learn something you did not know. That is an achievement and you should be proud too."

"I couldn't have done it without you, thank you," you replied, not really too sure where to look. You became sheepish, something you had not been much around Spock for quite some time. Whether it was the closeness, or the care from him, you weren't sure. 

"It has been an enjoyable two hours, I would like to do this again sometime," Spock seemed a little cautious, taking a breath before continuing. "Perhaps, without the studying."

He took you aback a little, before it fully clicked he was asking you on a date. 

"I would quite like that, Spock."

The day came to a close as he walked you back to your room before bidding you a goodnight. 

The morning came and you were up bright and early for your shift. As you finished getting dressed and tied your hair up, your comms system rang out.

"Lieutenant Y/N to the Captain's ready room."

With confusion and slight concern, you made your way to Jim's room with haste, not wanting to upset him in case he was in a bad mood or you had done something wrong. Reaching the room, you didn't even have to knock before the door swung open. You stepped inside, and  your brother sat with a face like thunder. 

"Captain? Or Jim today?" you asked, in the same joking manner as usual. 

"Spock?" he replied. 

"Weird choice of name, but who am I to judge?" you replied, shrugging. 

"Not funny."

"Never claimed to be, you've always been the clown. What's up with you?"

Jim raised an eyebrow, very clearly unimpressed.

"When were you going to tell me you were dating my first officer?"

You couldn't help but laugh. "What? I'm not dating Spock, relax. We just eat together and we're going on a date later this week, but I would love to know who told you that, because they found out before I did and that's one hell of a talent."

"Y/N, seriously. Have you thought about this?" You furrowed your brow, nodding him to elaborate. "This is Spock, he's a Vulcan, which means emotions are not his specialist subject."

"You'd be surprised, Jim. Why do you care so much anyway? He's your XO, you trust him don't you? He wouldn't hurt me, if that's what you're worried about. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't try this out and I won't go this weekend."

Jim stared at you, trying to summon any semblance of an answer for that, but realised he didn't actually have a legitimate reason to stop you. He did trust Spock, and he would trust Spock to keep you safe like he does, and to care for you. There was nothing really he could do to stop this, nor was there any reason he could see.

Sighing, he shook his head. "You're right. I just worry for you, you know? You're all I got, and-"

You cut him off with a hug. His grip tightened and you buried yourself into his shoulder. Pulling back, you smiled at him. 

"Don't worry, I love you too. I won't get myself killed, but if I do, he's all yours."

Jim laughed, and you joined in, grabbing your drink and heading towards the door. 

"Plus, it was Spock or Bones, so take your pick where you want."

"Y/N!"

With that, you closed the door over a little, laughing to yourself. From around the corner, you saw Spock, who raised his brow.

"Spock and Bones? What about us?"

You shrugged. "Nothing important, but if you go in there I'm sure you'll find out."

Spock cocked his head in curiosity, and you smiled.

"You look adorable like that, by the way." You leaned in and kissed his cheek, and swore you saw that blush red on his cheeks. "See you later."

As you walked away, Spock stood for a second, and touched his cheek where you left that kiss, and very faintly from behind the door came a voice that snapped him out of it.

"What the hell!"

[sandorsubs]

wiring your brain to control shifting

i was playing a video game but level was extremely hard. i shed blood and sweat, thinking "maybe this game is for pros and i'm not a good gamer" i was this close to give up but i wanted to see rest of the game so badly i kept trying. finally i passed it thinking it's just luck.

years later i played the game again. i hesitated at first but passed the same level in my first try. mind you i didn't become pro gamer or anything in all these years. it was just my brain wiring in the background, collecting data to find out what to do exactly but i've never realized this until i have to do it again.

if you ever said "i have never been able to do this throughout my life" for anything wait for a second and admit this is just a mental block you put between you and your desire. when you are wiring your brain, you don't realize it's happening, looks like nothing is changing or only little changes happening. because you don't see what's happening in background. it actually becomes easier but we don't care because if it's easier we are too focused on moving forward and achieving the desire.

then a random day it feels natural being able to do that. almost like you were born with this.

i've said this in my previous post, shifting isn't a skill/talent/sth related to luck or genetics. if you still think shifting is just one big change happens rarely and miraculously, please try to change that.

because shifting is just like water. it can be a drop or big ass ocean(depending on the changes in the realities). just because you've never seen an ocean, it doesn't mean you can't look at rain and say guess there has to be more.

you won't wire your brain to shift but to control it. if you aren't new to shifting, at least couple months passed since you've started your journey, your wiring has already started.

how wiring works for shifting?

i'll call this wiring path. you either stick to one thing you like or feel comfortable with, even a little interest is more than enough. or find an existing wiring path. the times you felt close to shifting for example. maybe a little voice keeps telling you this is your method. you probably have more than one wiring paths for shifting, but they are like unfinished projects. one of them must be more prominent, like at least 50% finished project.

after you've decided on your wiring path, it's not any different from achieving anything. you are not a monk, you won't be spending eternity if you are actively learning. do you know those clicking moments? you can meditate for thirty hours straight but a feeling or realization in one of your attempts takes wiring process further. and i gotta admit, maybe you needed those thirty hours meditation to realize this. that's what i love about wiring. nothing goes is in vain.

everything you do takes your wiring further.

if it feels like literally nothing is changing, you either work on more than one wiring paths or the process slowed down.

when you are not aware of this wiring, it's like pushing all the buttons and hope for best. that's what they mean by lock in. because trying everything at the same time or having backup methods is working on more than one wiring paths.

it's like learning ten languages at the same time but you are barely a1 in all of them.

like i said you have more than one wiring paths and they are unfinished projects, they all have potential. don't give them powers thinking one of them is better than the other. you make them work better with yourself. you have power to choose.

wiring from loa perspective

before loa folks come and say "so what you are saying is, you have to actually do sth to shift? stop planting assumptions in people's minds! i don't have to do anything to shift!"

baby, i'm gonna hold your hand while saying this, you assumption is also a work. you assumed you don't need 46 step method to shift or you have already shifted, right? good, i'm happy for you but see that's also a work. you still do something. you wire your brain this is how you'll control shifting. seriously, what do you consider as "work"? i'm not telling you to do 30 push-ups everyday. (i'm not being sarcastic btw, i love loa. but some of y'all doesn't like to see anything out of assumption-core. this isn't progressive and if my opinions are shaking the foundation of your assumption, sorry but maybe it's not much of an assumption because it shouldn't matter even the whole world is against you when it comes to loa -sandor goddard). whatever get on the ship loa gang, we are sailing

why "tried it all" shifters couldn't complete their wiring process then?

so i remember a person in my dm saying "i've tried a particular method for long period of time. i've tried it all and gave time."

i picture a student when i see "tried it all" shifters. this student thinks if they study math and score high marks in exams they'll be a perfect student. so they start working hard, ignoring the fact they hate math or find it hard to understand.

maybe they're interested in sports or literature but this student is obsessed with having perfect student image. they are not actively wiring, they are bargaining which only slows down and takes extra effort even to reach a milestone. they'll still have hard time to wire their brain even in subjects they do like. they study for 9 hours straight but the friend of them sniffs the textbook and scores higher.

then we have to let go of desire? it depends, i think there are two kinds of desire: first, a desire that helps you, reminds you of what you want to have and the second, desire that reminds you, what's lack. if your desire feels like a liability or its leeching you it's the second one. atp what your desire is unimportant. it's about how you see this unaccomplished desire.

plus if you are actively wiring your brain, you won't even have time to think about this desire obsessively. because you are too focused on what to do, desire is just a fuel and collectively helping you.

so people whose shifted in first attempt didn't wire any shit?

when you bumped into a "i shifted in my first attempt" person next rime, know that they are not shifting gods or prophets. they just figured out in instant what makes their brain easier to wire for controlling shifts. let's be fr some people are gifted with focusing or visualizing. they have useful existing wiring paths for shifting. plus i want to remind you something:

don't underestimate the power of a blank page. neutrality has higher frequency than courage, do you know why? because you don't have any fears or worries, when you are neutral you don't need a reason be courageous. i know if i erease your shifting attempts from your memory right now, you'd be shifting in your "first" attempt either. because most of the time you deal with your fears and worries instead of actively wiring.

how to actively wire?

people are trembling, throwing up and procrastinating when it comes to "attempt". i don't even want to call it attempt because you are actively learning. and no it's not "dw we learn from every attempt 🌺🌻✨" kinda motivation, it's literally how your brain is getting wired.

let's assume you find your wiring path, it's more prominent than other paths you have. for example its raven method + visualizing and falling asleep. you felt close to shifting with this method before. be aware of your every attempt and observe closely because by the time you'll get better at each part of your method. active wiring is not doing the same thing everyday robotically.

maybe normally you count to 100 but one day you feel you are already focused when you reached 40. or your focusing skills improved so much, you need to discard counting part, because you already wired that part in your brain. or you were visualizing yourself in your dr bed but suddenly you felt like you want to visualize one of your dr memories. your brain will be more invested in something they find interested. in previous student example i gave you, bargaining person misses these moments, they stubbornly do the same thing and rarely progress.

don't be scared of working on your wiring path. if you feel like you are waiting or pending, your wiring only slowed down. it doesn't always mean you need to do something, maybe you need to observe what you are doing and make simple changes. even if it means taking a break.

active wiring is not waiting for the day you'll achieve it. when you are learning a new skill you do your thing and expect it to be successful every single time even if it's your first time. you can almost see yourself achieving it. this expectation doesn't come from bargaining tho, it's your desire, the healthy kind.

in next posts i'll be sharing my way to wire my brain to control shifting and the terms i came up with. this is how i observed and decided to use wiring for myself. please take care and don't consume everything you read if it feels wrong or doesn't sit with you, or you don't even want to accept it true. spit it out. same for this post.

[forrest-knight]

If Digimon Had Tumblr

🤖goin-ballistiac Follow

Hey guys so uh,, it turns out that @/donedevidan is an x-antiphobe, especially towards those who naturally carry it (screenshots under the cut)

Keep reading

😺guts-but-lion-x Follow

always hated that dude, guess I have another reason to hate him more

#dude was always a prick #and he loved making leomon dying jokes #those arent fucking funny #leomons dying arnt fucking funny

(103 notes)

👽s-n-a-t-c-h-e-d Follow

she evolved on my digi till I shinka

🥶️frostybirb Follow

bro wtf is this

👽s-n-a-t-c-h-e-d Follow

me trying to be funny😔

#i thought this webbed site would be easy #it isnt

(128 notes)

⚡️pulsingheart Follow

I think I'm going to evolve soon!

🦴️mean-and-green Follow

Runnermon is just Lighdramon but green and white

Go Bulkmon

🐺lycangaruthrope Follow

First of all, its Raidramon.

Second, whats wrong with Raidramon and Runnermon???

🦴️mean-and-green Follow

Oh of course the FRIENDSHIP WOLF DIGIMON is gonna vouch for the OTHER FRIENDSHIP WOLF DIGIMON

Bulkmon is so much more stronger than both digimon combined

🐺lycangaruthrope Follow

Strength isnt everything!!! But wrong tho, bulkmon is just some meaty digimon who is obviously compensating for something with those "muscles"

raidramon would def beat bulkmon anyways, so would runnermon

(374 notes)

💗extra-extra-big-dragon☑️☑️☑️ Follow

Windows 98 trying run me without exploding

(3,941 notes)

🌺hydrangeavenom Follow

Can digiblr stop flagging my selfies as nsfw????

I SWEAR I dont have a "hydrussy"

It's just a mouth!!!

(13,112 notes)

🥬️snivelingsni Follow

honestly I've been deathly afraid of spider digimon for most of my life and idk why

🌐not-a-spider-woman Follow

oh? why don't you come and meet with me so we discuss this fear further.

🥬️snivelingsni Follow

Sure! I really want to dig deep and see why I am so afraid of spiders

🥬️snivelingsni Follow

Good News! I now know why I'm afraid of spider digimon!

Bad News! I was almost eaten by a spider digimon today!

(691 notes)

❌alphaxxxxxx☑️☑️☑️ Follow

Fuck everyone on this hellsite

except you ouryumon

you're cool

🔥ouryuken Follow

THANKS FATHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#omg!!!! #he loves me!!!!!!

(56,884 notes)

👼the-top-angle☑️ Follow

Tamer forgot to take me to the toilet now there's shit on the floor

🕊piddy-piddo-pid Follow

Can't believe I serve this dude

#can i digivolve into an icedevimon #please yggdrasil

(44,529 notes)

🖤botablack Follow

just hatched😊

☯️silvertdao Follow

Arent you a little young for digiblr

🖤botablack Follow

kys

☯️silvertdao Follow

nvm you fit right in perfectly

(1,227 notes)

👿donedevidan Follow

I hope every Appmon gets deleted

Fuck them useless mfs

😇lady-of-the-light Follow

How tf are you still here??????

@digiblr-staff can you ban this bigot?????

😇lady-of-the-light Follow

Fuck it, I'm tagging all of the staff's personal blogs cause this is ridiculous

@extra-extra-big-dragon @alphaxxxxxx @duftycat @do-the-wyvern @omega-delete @pinkknightfab @thegallantdukedom @useurcranium @the-bara-hero @i-am-not-jc @ultra-vvv @goldenarmorv @sixlegsandabow

staff, ban this asshole

(102,333 notes)

[journey-to-the-attic]

alright so i've just spent most of the morning catching up with nb s3 so here are my thoughts immediately in retrospect (spoilers of course)

it became very clear with the last few lessons that the writers either were on crunch time to round things up (most likely) or just could not give a shit (feels less likely, and i want to have more faith than that in them)

so i guess we're never going to find out what nightbringer's deal was? or what he meant by sending mc back in time to find happiness?

or what that prophecy was about

or how nightbringer 'made solomon the man he is'

or why barbatos was so mysteriously knowing in the opening movie, as if he had something to do with the time thing

or what the deal is with michael

story ended before we could date thirteen :(

not really to do with s3 but i wonder if they ever intended to have mc make pacts with diavolo or barbatos

thirteen and mephistopheles did not have arcs at all? there were some points where it felt like thirteen was deliberately excluded, even

raphael's arc is over so abruptly as well. he's anguished and distraught and then babel explodes but not really and he's completely fine again afterwards?

did not need lucifer to be in angel form for the master moment. and i feel like it would've hit harder for lucifer as a demon to break through the illusion anyway!!

it felt like there were so many cop-outs in general

rule of three: mc does fall from things three times in total but there doesn't seem to have been any real narrative reason for that

the last fall had a whole dramatic foreshadowing dream about it! but mc just has a brief vision and then it turns out lucifer caught them and everyone's fine

got real tired of the angel stuff.. the celestial realm's done a complete 360 in terms of its perception in the narrative and i'm really not a fan of it

simeon just. decides to keep being an angel. and it works??????

well it immediately turns him back to human apparently anyway

and the implication at the end is that he's just going to go back to being an angel, too, which... COME ON

i audibly went "oh ffs" at that part

i wasn't that mad at them just reversing the demon-simeon thing because i think the most interesting way to explore his character was to keep him human

then they kept going and i was like GUYS NO WAIT

the magical science is really frustrating because it's just close enough to real life science but a bit too hand-wavey about the magical mechanics to be interesting

beel gets done incredibly dirty in general - it felt like the majority his dialogue just continued to boil down to "i want food"

barbatos has basically nothing to do, which is crazy given the nature of nightbringer and his... you know... time powers

i really do not buy mc being totally fine after all of their exploits. surely there must be SOME physical repercussions even if they're so powerful?

the implication that the brothers are eventually going to figure out the time travel thing (and that diavolo already knows) interests me, but of course now we'll never know

the unwillingness to bring up any real conflict around mc's increasing power was really frustrating in general - couldn't the 'it does that to defend out of a manifestation of their kindness' thing have come after they genuinely struggled with it for a bit?

couldn't anyone have debated what they might have to do if mc became a danger to the devildom? because that angst could've been great

mc's magic in general isn't really handled well

the moon plot in lesson 60 felt like it was intended to be the big climax of s4, which was then hastily repurposed into the s3 finale when it was announced that the story wouldn't continue past there - it felt similar in vibe to the three-world-imbalance plotline of om s2, something that really needed a lot more time for both the build-up and fall-out

for a hot second i was convinced this was gonna be an atla 'my lover turned into the moon :/' thing but of course not

the premise of the moon plot was really good though! i can imagine a better planned season, with writers who actually had time, that could have done it really well!

the idea of 'the moon is in love with mc too' was a really funny plot point (/positive), kind of loved it

i genuinely didn't realise that the moon plot had been resolved until diavolo started making his science fair speech. i thought it had failed because mc and [demon brother] got blown up or something, and they'd have to try again

so for a good while i was just going "guys?? guys the moon? it's still coming? the big moon? it's gonna kill everyone ??"

i got excited by the chapter name 'the sleeping demon' because i thought the king was going to get involved, but it's just whichever brother you picked passing the fuck out after the moon explodes

there's a lot more routes in lesson 60 - almost certainly because they had to get in an obligatory end-of-season kiss with all the romanceables and couldn't fit them all

the generic references to 'he' and the lack of any dialogue from the other brothers during 'the sleeping demon' made it feel really stilted and awkward - i suppose they didn't have enough time to really tailor the dialogue to each brother, which is fair enough, but also the plot point of the brother passing out didn't feel necessary in the first place

if they needed a branching point to pick a brother for their obligatory kiss, they could've just had mc get moon blasted and then they can choose which brother is there when they wake up

they'd need a different plot point for the others after that, but it gets rid of the awkward references to a nameless 'he'

the thing that puzzles me is that seasons usually wrap up their big plots by the end anyway, but the pacing of the end of s3 feels like they were expecting to end at, like, lesson 70 instead - my best guess is that a pre-existing lesson 60 had to be modified to feel suitably end-game (brings me back to the idea that the moon plot was meant for a future season)

also i don't purport to know what's going on behind the scenes but at times it felt like they could have spent maybe ten more minutes adding a little more dialogue (the bonus story in lesson 60 comes to mind)

all in all... it's a weird place to end the story on. i probably still need to gather my actual feelings regarding that but right now i'm just kinda like "okay. huh. well nice knowing you guys i guess"