#i've been accumulating a lot

[mysticwiki]

purchased my plane tickets for summer break to visit my lovely gf/love of my life/my beloved, let's GOOOOOO

[crescentfool]

TWO YEARS OF MINATO NUI!!! 💙

[vuliyshenanigans]

A Valkowl for the ttrpg system I'm currently working on. This piece features a possible mutation by the setting's magic. Mana of the Sky variety likes to settle in the eyes. Extreme mutations might also start emitting clouds around the head.

[ferronickel]

Resisting the urge to post hot takes about webcomics craft

[blujayonthewing]

so in juniper's campaign we've just found ourselves in a high-stakes situation that I as a player do frankly find stressful and am anxious about, but hey hi also the DM was like 'okay here are the exact mechanics of how this is going to work because I don't want to surprise you with serious repercussions, also here are all the options you will have to try to do something about the situation-- [affected player] what do you think? honest feedback, I don't want it to feel unfair, I want to be clear that I am not just trying to kill your character, and if it ends up being badly balanced we can revisit it down the road' and oh my god I could COLLAPSE and WEEP with gratitude

[psalmsofpsychosis]

after my ✨️third✨️ attempt in the past 4 days to expose myself to standup comedy and build my lukewarm-jokes survival muscles i'll hereby conclude that jesus christ i'd rather fucking die

[a-moth-to-the-light]

The Ultimate Crossover Episode (Epilogue)

Giving K-pop Groups (and Soloists!) Bruce Springsteen Songs

content warnings for mentions of death & chronic illness! this is a pretty intense piece, so take care of yourselves, and feel free to check out the other parts of this series (see: #six stans springsteen) for some much lighter content!

A Tentative Endorsement of Bruce Springsteen's "I'm On Fire"

My chronic pain is an action movie where nothing happens. You get all the swells of soundtrack; all the dramatic lighting; all those moments of pure terror, of catching a glimpse of death in the corner of your eye and trying to pretend it isn't there--but then the footage, the plot of the movie itself, is just a girl lying on a couch, earbuds in and eyes shut tight, heating pad wrapped around her wrist. The room is empty, and you would guess she was asleep except for the expressions that cross her face--a wince, and then something like a silent sob. And the soundtrack crescendoes, and you wait for something to happen. Will an antagonist come attack her, in her moment of weakness? Will she finally have someone to fight? But the scene stays the same--empty. She stays the same--almost, but not quite, sleeping. And then: that's the movie, you can head home now. There won't be anything new to see, not for a long while.

In the summer of 2021, I took to describing my pain by saying "I'm on fire" or "I'm burning up". Something under my skin was burning, burning, a river of lava coursing beneath the facade of a perfectly healthy body. And, on days when it got really bad, I took to listening to Bruce Springsteen's "I'm On Fire". Let's take a minute to introduce this track: it's a short song, not even three minutes long, tucked in the middle of Springsteen’s 1984 album, Born in the USA. It's not the best song on the album (not anywhere close, in my opinion), and it's not the most interesting, either. But it may well be my favorite, and it's definitely my most-listened, song from Born in the USA. I love “I’m On Fire”--not in a way that’s easy to comprehend or express, not in a way I’m proud of or happy about. But, since I talked about it in my Enhypen post, I've wanted to at least try to explain what this song means to me.

As my health deteriorated and my terror increased in that summer of pain, the first summer I spent with that chronic illness, I found so much comfort in singing along the simple hook of "I'm On Fire", a hook that I don't think was meant to be about what it became about to me. But it didn't matter; woah, oh, oh, I'm on fire. How different, after all, is it to be burning mentally rather than physically? And the burning got to my mind, eventually. I was still new to the pain, then, barely seven months new, and I was convinced the burning would take me out any day that summer. You know it's nothing because the doctors say it's nothing, that there's nothing terribly wrong with you, but it feels like you have to give out at some point, right? Like, death must be in the room, otherwise there's no way my body would be screaming this loudly. My chronic pain is hearing a fire alarm go off all day, every day, but being told whenever I ask: "Oh, there's no fire." Like, I guess it's nice that there's no fire--I guess I should be glad. But then why won't the goddamned alarm stop screaming at me? How am I supposed to pretend this is normal?

So, that summer, my life became a movie, one where I looked just like I always had and sat around the house, becoming perpetually attached to my heating pad and moving as little as possible, for fear of setting something off by accident and making the pain even worse. In later seasons, my existence would become more normal, waking up in the morning less surprising to me, and with that, the fear less gripping. And I would start to move again, learning to block out the fire alarm that soundtracks my existence.

But there's still “I’m On Fire”. My dad, who was my introduction to Springsteen and who I, as a result, share most of my Springsteen favorites with, hates "I'm On Fire". And I get why, but I love the song anyway. I could listen to it all day. And I guess I could justify that opinion in a nice, reviewer-y way: the texture of the guitar instrumental is gorgeous, and the melodies are sticky & perfect for singing along to, despite how flatly Springsteen performs them.

But I don’t know, I don’t really care a lot about “I’m On Fire” being good. And I don't care a lot about it being bad, either. I don't care that the lyrics give me the creeps; I don't care that it's really a big nothing of a song, even compared to Springsteen's own "Nothing Man". I just know that it captures something about my summer of 2021, a summer that remains queen of my nightmares--it captures how those months were terrifying and yet so, so banal. You know, that feeling when Springsteen so casually sings, almost mutters, “someone took a knife, baby, edgy and dull, and cut a six-inch valley through the middle of my soul”. Most songs, most artworks, most people, don’t get that feeling. These days, I don’t even really get it myself. Only occasionally do I understand how I felt back then--for example, right now, after listening to “I’m On Fire” for 20 minutes straight while I try to get these words out. I don’t like “I’m On Fire”, really, except for maybe those beautiful guitar clicks, but I love it. I love to sing its melodies; it’s a part of me now. It knows something about me, something about my history, that even I don’t really know anymore—maybe, honestly, that I try not to know.

Is this too sad of an ending for a series that's mostly just me being giddy about my favorite music? Yes, probably, but it still feels right to me. I love that Springsteen's music doesn't shy away from sadness; I dance to it anyway, sing to it anyway, and find comfort in it anyway. Anyway, I hope you've enjoyed my bruceposting (which I'm sure this won't be the end of, since I'm seeing him in concert in a few months)!

[yeleltaan]

//Hey everyone! Just wanted to let you know that I'll be going on a short hiatus (roughly a week) to sort out a variety of stuff and get some rest from the platform.

I've been feeling negative lately when it comes to writing, and also not all that comfortable on the blog. On top of that this Spring break isn't much of a break for me between assignments and other personal matters, so I really need to be in a more focused headspace and not let stress get to me.

I won't be around in the dash and I'll likely miss most of what goes on, though if you tag me in something or send me a link I'll be sure to take a look. I'll also still respond to IM's on Tumblr and Discord so by all means feel free to message me for anything, be it plotting or some other kind of chatting!

That is all, I'll see you soon. Take care!

[moinsbienquekaworu]

Also I'm really into Venom now. Good night!

[steddie-island]

I'm trying to put the tree up and have had to rearrange books 3 times to make room. I don't know what I'm feeling more right now, the desire to just say fuck it and put the damn tree back in its box or the dread of "how many of these books am I not going to get to read before I die?" 💀

[thorinlandscaping]

love to stress myself out over stupid things and then go to bed

[batsplat]

just read ur take on the big three rivalries/relationships and i wanted to know how much u know about djokovics and nadals history with the whole being friendly/sharing an manager/practising together until novak started dominating (the way rafa literally switched from calling him to nole to novak in 2011 specifically after the madrid incident lmao and novak deflecting when asked how their friendship was going at wimbledon that same year) i feel like those two have a lot of history and most people ignore it or just arent aware of it ig

they do have a lot of history! idt they were necessarily THAT friendly with each other pre 2011. nadal was always the wunderkind who djokovic (and murray) were chasing. you had classic young djokovic moments like saying that he was in control of his rg 2006 match with nadal until djokovic's back problems, that he realised he didn't have to do anything special to defeat nadal, that nadal's beatable (nadal won the first two sets 6-4 6-4 before djokovic retired). still one of the funniest things he's said fairs

but their relationship did clearly get worse in 2011, when djokovic had that phenomenal season and beat nadal all six times they faced each other (still a shame he lost his first match that year at the roland garros semis against federer, denying us the final with nadal everyone wanted to see). there's also obviously stuff like handshake compilations over the years lol

anyway, their relationship also seemingly took a turn for the worse in 2022 over the whole australia deportation drama. I should say that in their early years, big three rivalries were a little more exciting (well, maybe not federer/nadal, but the other two) - it's just that all three of them were increasingly committed to just being ultra respectful *cough* pr merchants *cough* and it limited how much they would even let themselves do anything interesting. nadal can be a bit of a prick who's a lot more amiable when he's winning and is generally more of a sore loser than djokovic, but what's the point if you've collectively taken a vow to not rock the boat? and djokovic, who became massively unpopular for absolutely no good reason, eventually responded to all the criticism and booing with this slightly desperate attempt to make himself loved - the boob throw celebration is obviously the most infamous example and thank god he dropped that a few years ago. which is compelling in itself, but unfortunately it's all considerably less compelling these days... whenever he's being a pantomime villain, it's now about The Establishment.... stuff like this wimbledon where he was being kinda delusional about what the fans were yelling, saying they were booing him when they were calling his opponent's name, which? I like that, I liked the interview, it was silly camp fun. and then it became discourse bloody piers morgan was speaking out on as some kind of grand statement about how djokovic wouldn't let himself be silenced any more. that's not fun!!

anyway, djokovic/nadal is still an all time great tennis rivalry, and I've enjoyed plenty of their matches over the years. just don't think they offered quite enough narrative tension to live up to *59 matches* and monopolising the sport + all the attention within it for like. a lot of years. idk they could've move more imo

[remembertheplunge]

I like this one! I'm an attorney and have to wear a tie in court a lot. So, I have tons of ties. Ties and socks are the only way the male attorney can express themselves in court.

Wayne Thiebaud - Row of Ties (1969)

[crest-of-gautier]

im obsessed with this weapon now.. i feel like im back in the launch days of splatoon 3...

[kentucky-daisey]

I'm not much one for physical contact, but I had a really stressful meeting at work and all I want is a really tight hug. I'm emotionally exhausted.

[2manyfandoms2count]

didn't realise you'd already answered that, how about 27 ?

Thanks for the ask, Fae 🥰

27. what’s your favorite or go-to outfit?

So I answered the go-to part here, but I've had time to sleep on the favourite part (it felt like a lot of pressure akzhdjkef) and for spring/summer I'd say it's this Uniqlo dress I got years ago with a purple floral pattern, and for autumn/winter it's what I like to call my Midnights outfit (because it has TSwift Midnights vibes and I wore it the day the album came out last October), which consists in a light brown corduroy skirt (with pockets!!!), a thin, black turtle-neck sweater, woolen tights and brown lace-up ankle boots

Ask me a weirdly specific question!