#i'm usually so on top of the tag during the season since i don't have feeds but this year i've been so busy 😭

[lucysarah-c]

Question: for Virgin! Canon Levi; how do you think that would go down? Like full blown sex one night? Taking it slow over time? Just how do you think reader would need to navigate it with him? Slow burn / build up, a passionate night, tipsy reader?

This is assuming Levi and Reader’s emotions are confirmed for each other

Hiiiii~~ How are you? What have you been up to lately?

Haha, honestly, I'm not entirely sure what caused this full blow-up of questions, but I'm kinda loving it.

Mhh, I think my answer depends a lot on two factors: "Levi's age" and "the experience of the reader." I know you said Canon Levi, but I wonder if you mean canon season 1-4 Levi, Underground Levi, pre-promotion Levi, etc. haha

I'll conclude that you meant "canon season 1-3" Levi. While I personally don't headcanon Captain Levi as a virgin during the "overall" period of AoT (I mean, since season 1, not ACWNR or Underground Levi), I think his reaction depends a lot on how much experience the reader has. Levi strikes me as one of those friends/partners who loves you, cares about you, etc., but hardly ever talks about themselves. In my humble opinion, even if Levi has feelings for you and you two decide to pursue a relationship together, it may take him a lot of time to open up about his past. I mean, this man gets along with Hange amazingly in the story; Isayama says that Hange is who "understands" or "gets along better with Levi," and yet Hange didn't know about Kenny.

So this may be a wild take… but I think Levi wouldn't tell you it's his first time, lmao. He may try to play it cool; you might notice he's not the most "skilled" dude out there ('cause let me tell you, no amount of Ackerman powers makes you seem experienced, lol), but he's not telling you it's his first time. Which, you know, everybody is entitled to their past. Perhaps if the reader is also a virgin and she opens up emotionally like, "It's my first time," Levi would feel she's opening up to him, and he would feel it's a good time to be honest too and be like, "Well… it's mine too, so I guess we will figure it out as we go."

About "how" it would be, I think the reader would have to set the tempo. Most men are READY to blow off some steam if you give them a chance, haha, so if the reader is also a virgin and they kinda want to test the waters before going all the way, Levi would be down for it, especially because it will give him time to catch a trick or two, learn what she likes.

I think that porn or movies make us believe how "sex" usually happens, and I mean, talking from my experience and my friends' experiences… none of us went from 0 to 10. Like, we kiss, we make out, then maybe we got a little handy, then riding on top of clothes, oral sex, fingers, etc. Especially because maybe you don't have your own place to crash at, maybe you two would like to talk it out before it happens. Buy condoms, get ready, etc.

Now, if you are curious how I think Underground Levi would decide to lose his V-card while younger… probably rather quick, steamy, and not giving it much thought, haha. He'd let the hormones talk and make decisions for him. In both occasions, I don't think he made the girl cum before him, which is something that happens a lot; we women are harder to please, it requires more technique than men who… well, let's say that they come rather easily, lol. BUT he will 100% offer to make her cum anyway, with fingers or mouth. Levi will be such a fast learner, give him a chance or two, and he will pick it up like a champ.

Though why can't I shake the idea of a younger Levi in the underground in his 18s, having something with a girl slightly older than him, perhaps 20, etc. And her saying between chuckles, "Slow down, boy."

God, I would pay to see his blushed, embarrassed face.

Link to my masterlist and my other works if you feel like checking them out. Tags!: @nube55 @justkon @notgoodforlife @nmlkys @humanitys-strongest-bamf @quillinhand @thoreeo @darkstarlight82 @angelofthor @aomi04 @levisbrat25 @l3visthighs @hum4n-wr3ckag3 @hannieslovebot @starrylevi @rithty @mariaace @ackrmntea @emilyyyy-08 @levisfavoriteteashop @katestrophes @levistealeaf @an-ever-angry-bi @youre-ackermine @fxnnyackerman @secretmoneybearvoid @trashblackrainbow @flxrartsstuff @katharinasdiaryy @levisecretgfblog @searriously @blackdxggr @ackermanswifee @abiatackerman @braunsbabe @moonchild-12345 @levicansteponme @galactict3a Wanna join my tag list? Here!

[russellsppttemplates]

I don't think you'll ever have to find out (Carlos Sainz)

The lack of contract for next season has been pushing Carlos to extremes and friends and family have noticed it

Note: english is not my first language. First Carlos big piece 🫶 I hope you enjoy reading it 😊

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: mentions some anxiety and burnout symptoms

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog @hiireadstuff @c-losur3

"Hmmmm", you hummed as you felt the mattress move a little before the warm sheets approached your body instead of the warm body that laid under them before.

"Shh, it's just me, cariño", Carlos lulled you, "go back to sleep, it's still early", he kissed your forehead softly as the tucked you in properly.

"Where are you going since it's still early then?", you wondered groggily, "I'm going for a run, I'll be back to have breakfast with you, okay? I love you", he kissed your forehead again before he grabbed his workout clothes and stepped into the ensuite.

When you woke up a few hours later, you could hear water running from the shower, assuming Carlos had got back from his run.

Opening the windows and pulling the sheets to the end of the bed so the whole room could air out, you put on your slippers and one of your boyfriend's hoodies, heading downstairs to start on breakfast. After a quick look at the meal plan left by his trainer, you retrieved the ingredients from the pantry and fridge, toasting, whisking and flipping what you needed to when you heard footsteps joining you on the kitchen.

"Good morning, beautiful", Carlos said as he hugged you from your back, his lips kissing under your ear softly before he looked at what you were making, "smells nice", he murmured before you turned your head slightly so you could kiss his cheek.

"Here you go", you smiled as you handed Carlos the plates to carry to the table while you carried your drinks.

"Gracias, my love", he smiled back as he sat down, taking a sip from his mug and starting light conversation between you two.

"I need to go to the school to get some forms from the secretariat service and some of the kids' tests I forgot to bring home", you began telling him your plans for the day, "I'll mark them when I get home, but we might have some time to spend together in the afternoon".

"I have a meeting with my engineers to analyse data and then I have a sponsor event as well, I have to go there, give an interview and hang around for a bit - I think I'm going to be home for dinner though", he explained his schedule, "but you can use the office, don't worry", he smiled, kissing the top of your head once he finished eating, taking both plates with him back to the kitchen.

"I love you, handsome, have a good day!", you said, kissing his lips once you left the house, knowing he wasn't going to be there when you arrived back from school.

The secretariat services were quicker than usual in getting you the paperwork you needed so you were able to go to your classroom next. As you were making sure everything was in place and none of the kids had left anything out during the holidays, you looked for the tests.

"Hi, Y/N! What are you doing here?", your colleague from the classroom next to yours wondered after she announced her presence with a light knock on your door.

"Hello! I could ask you the same thing, hm?", you chuckled, "I left the tests here and they're not going to mark themselves", you waved the folder in your hand.

"Carlos isn't racing this week?", she asked. You had been classroom buddies for over five years so you had gotten to know eachother pretty well and felt comfortable enough around eachother to ask such questions.

"No, he's racing next weekend though, I'm flying out to see him and then flying back in a hurry so I can teach without taking many days off", you offered.

"Sounds good then! Good luck with all of those, my little ones had some trouble with these last tests, I must say", she added.

"I haven't even looked at them properly to be honest, but I'm sure they did their best", you recalled, waving at her as she said goodbye before putting everything you needed in your bag and leaving as well.

When you arrived back home, you walked straight to the office, arranging your desk in a way that your organisation system worked: to be marked, marked, and the double checked tests, along with space for you laptop so you could insert the data straight on the platform.

The pause you had for lunch was spent on the balcony, soaking up the sun rays while you ate and allowed your mind to escape the math problems and the water cycle drawings your little ones made.

It started when you were a teenager and wanted to earn a little extra money, wanting to buy things yourself and the small independence that came with it, so you started offering help to your neighbours' kids with their homework in exchange of a small amount of money. Over the years, it got a little more serious and grew outside of your neighbourhood because you enjoyed it so much and the kids and their parents loved the work you did, and when it to came to choosing a career you'd see yourself working in happily, teaching little ones sounded perfect. Years later, it still brought a smile to your face every single day.

You were measuring the rice quantity for you and Carlos when he arrived, "cariño, are you in the kitchen?", you heard him ask once he shut the door.

"Yes, my love, just getting dinner ready", you called back, washing your hands once you were done while he stepped closer to you. Drying your hands on a kitchen towell, you left it on the counter once your boyfriend joined you in the room, "did you have a good day?", you mumbled against his lips before stealing a big kiss from him.

"It was good, did what needed to be done, and you? Are your little geniuses getting good grades this term?", he smiled, lacing his arms around your waist and pulling you closer to him.

"They did so well! I'm so proud of them, they barely had any spelling mistakes and they drew these pretty drawings on the side - I have to show you, come look!", you pulled his hand to follow you to the office, feeling his tiredness in his movements and stalling, "I can show you later - how about a cuddle in the sofa while dinner cooks?", you suggested as you noticed him nod, "sounds nice", he kissed your hand as you pulled him to the living room, letting you rest your body against his for a little bit as he told you a little more about his day.

"Sounds tiring", you mumbled, tracing random shapes on his clothed chest, "it's fine, part of the job", he shrugged as he looked at his watch, "dinner should be ready soon, no? I'll help you with the table", he kissed your forehead before you got up and sorted the meal for the two of you.

By the time you were done, cleaning up was easy and quick. Carlos suggested you retired to the bedroom early, doing your night-time routines before cuddling on the bed.

"How about a movie?", you suggested, flickering the streaming platforms to find something to watch.

"I might fall asleep in the middle of it, you won't get too mad if I do?", he smiled, kissing your cheek multiple times.

"Of course I won't be mad, love! I'd never be mad for that", you cooed, looking up at his eyes as he tried his hardest to blink the sleep away, "I'll keep the volume down and the brightness low, you sleep all you want, okay?", you checked with him, sealing your request with a kiss on his lips, "sleep well, my love".

Carlos pulled you closer to him, your scent and steady heartbeat lulling him to sleep quickly, leaving you to smile at his peaceful features when you glanced away from the screen every now and again.

.

"You look so gorgeous! My teacher was never this stylish!", Blanca said as she greeted you once you stepped inside her car, setting your bag on the seat next to yours and squeezing her shoulder as well as her mother's, "hello hello! Thank you for inviting me, I've been needing a wardrobe change now that the temperatures are warmer", you smiled as they squeezed your hand back before you put your seatbelt on.

"It's been a while since I've seen you, dear, how have you been?", Reyes asked you while her daughter drove off to the spot where they wanted to spend the afternoon shopping.

"The little ones have been keeping me busy, now that they're on school break, it's a little bit calmer", you replied.

"That's nice, you shouldn't run yourself to the point of exhaustion - no matter how much you love it, you should also take care of yourself! You and Carlos are very much alike on that - your work ethic is excellence", she winked through the rear view mirror.

You agreed with your boyfriend's mother. Both you and Carlos worked extremely hard to get to the point you were in now and sometimes you needed someone - often eachother - to pull you out of a overworking spiral.

When Blanca was trying on a dress, you and Reyes sat on the small sofa while you waited for her and conversation flowed easily like usual, "how has Carlos been? It's been a while since I've seen him too", she wondered.

"He's been working a lot - being without a contact prospect for next year has obviously had a big impact on him", you began, "to be completely honest, I worry he is overdoing it. It's meeting after meeting, then all the workouts he goes on - I'm happy he's healthy for it, but too much of something is never good, right?", you shared.

"I've noticed it, too - I wasn't just asking", she smirked softly, "but I wanted to confirm it with you, a mother's instinct is always worried for her children and maybe part of me was hoping I was just exaggerating".

"I've tried to make sure he feels all the support he has and just be there for him, but I think it's all him, pushing to be better and better", you expressed your worries.

"What do you think about us having dinner at your place? Not to invite myself - even though that's what it is-, but maybe he would feel better and more inclined for a yes? Last times I invited you two for dinner with us he said he had things planned and the plans fell through", she said.

"Sounds nice, don't worry about inviting yourselves in", you chuckled as she gently squeezed your shoulder, "I'm going to suggest it to him, thank you", you squeezed her hand.

"We should be the ones thanking you", Blanca said as she stepped out, leaving you to assume she heard some of the conversation, "you've been his safe place for so long and continue to do so no matter the conditions", she smiled, "you're making sure my very hard headed brother is looking after himself and being looked after - the love you have for eachother is all we could've wanted for Carlitos", she hugged you, "now do we think this looks nice as it is or is it borderline making me look like a cloud?", she looked at the piece of clothing on her body.

You were pulled out of sleep when you heard Carlos mumbled something incoherent, and turning to face him, the sweat on his forehead evidencing that he was probably having a nightmare.

"Amor, hey - wake up, amor, wake up", you shook him awake, "it's just a nightmare, you're okay, you're okay", you coaxed him as he opened his eyes, turning on his bedside lamp while you held onto his hand.

"I woke you up? I'm sorry", he apoligised, voice groggy as he tried to catch his breath and bring his heart rate back to normal.

"It's okay, amor", you smiled, kissing his cheek and brushing the hairs away that were stuck to his forehead, "do you want to talk about it?".

Did he want to talk about it? The nightmares that kept occurring and keeping him up, only until now they had only woken him up? They had been happening for about a month now. He would wake up all sweaty and his breathing erratic, and more often than not, he wouldn't be able to fall asleep again, so he stayed awake thinking about all the possibilities of how his employment situation would be for next year and all of the ways he could improve his performance.

"It's fine", he gulped, "let's go back to sleep, okay?", he encouraged.

You knew better than to push him at that moment, so you cuddled up to him, holding him too as you kissed his chest, "I'm right here, nothing bad is going to happen to you, I'll make sure of it", you whispered before he turned the light off, wanting to believe you so badly and to sleep without his mind running a million miles an hour.

.

It really was taking up a lot of his mind - as well as your and his family's worries - and how it was soon going to be too much if he didn't manage everything well, and after his mother's conversation with you, you knew you needed to do something.

"My love, can I talk to you for a second?", you asked as you walked inside the office, seeing his sat in the long sofa instead of at the desk, "sure, come here, cariño", he urged, tidying some of the papers and notebooks so you could sit.

"I'm not going to bat around the bush, this is going to be straight off the bat - me and your family are concerned you're running yourself harder than you should, and if you keep going at this rate, you're going to burnout soon", you tried, rubbing his thigh softly and encouraging him to really think about it.

He pondered his words for a bit, "I have to do all I'm doing, Y/N, if I stop, I'll fall behind - it's bad enough as it is", he argued.

"But it's not doing you any good, handsome, you're more tired, you barely spend time with your family, with me even", you argued back. You didn't want to play that card or make him feel like he was failing you, that wasn't the point, "you're not doing the things that bring you joy outside of your work, and it shows", you attempted again.

"I have to keep working, I can try and make more time for them, but I can't miss my workouts and these data analysis sessions", he reasoned, "there's so much at stake here and I can't miss any of it because I'm unprepared or unfit".

"Handsome, I never wanted you to stop all of a sudden - and I knew you wouldn't anyway, I know who I'm dating, believe it or not", you smiled, "all I'm saying is you need to protect yourself too, have a place to just be yourself and let loose for a bit", you grabbed his hand and brought it to your mouth, kissing his knuckles.

"I will try my best", Carlos stated, "I'm sorry if I've been neglecting you", he said and you shook your head.

"No worries, now come and help me because your parents are coming over for dinner!", you have him a cheeky smile, pulling him to the kitchen and away from work for the rest of the day.

"This had my mother's hand on it, didn't it?", he wondered.

"She told me she was worried, and I agreed - so I took matters into my own hands because we knew you wouldn't let your mother tell you half of what I told you", you pulled him to you, hugging him tight, "we love you so much, I love you so much - and things are going to work out for you, I know they will", you kissed his clothed chest before looking up at him, "we all want you to be happy at what you do and you're doing the best you can - the universe will do the rest, amor".

"What would I do without you?", Carlos asked, kissing your lips passionately.

"Lucky for you, I don't think you'll ever have to find out", you smiled.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hey, steph! how are you, like, genuinely? not the small talk. i wanna listen

Hey Lovely 💜🖤

I want to apologize for putting this off for so long... which should be a clue as to how I am actually doing.

Honestly? Not good, but I'm trying my best. It's been... a time. Will put under a cut for those who don't want to read about the tagged items.

TL;DR – my real life is a bit chaotic, and I hide a lot from y'all because I REALLY try not to be negative here since my blog is where I come to be happy AND because I am a very private person, but I try my best to just keep going day to day as the chaos settles down slowly.

I've got some good things coming though, so I hope a week's rest next week when I'm off (and will probably take a break from here too) will reset my brain.

Work has been insane, and is most of the cause of my mental distress for the past few months. From Easter until Canada Day Weekend at my job is lovingly referred to as "Silly Season" simply because of how on-the-fly, balls-to-the-wall our workload is until summertime downtime officially begins for us. Without disclosing too much, it's basically non-stop, long hours for me until one of the 3 break weeks we get during the this long stretch happens where, incidentally because of the nature of my job and the team I work on, it actually gets BUSIER for us.

It actually ended earlier than we expected this year (yesterday) and we'll be "quieter" until the end of September now. See an opportunity, I actually took next week off between the two long weekends because my mental health has taken a severe hit and I'm having trouble just... enjoying things? I'm haven't gamed or drew in a few weeks, and blogging and writing feels like a chore. I literally just come home, file this blog, reply to one or two asks, and then go to bed, and do it all over again the next day. Day in and day out, for 3 months. On weekends I have to force myself out of my apartment because I KNOW I will sink lower if I don't leave.

On top of that, my brain has convinced me that literally everyone hates me: friends, coworkers, family, you guys, my damned plants. I just feel very alone these days and... I'll be real here, I've almost abandoned this blog a few times in the past few months. I feel like I make fic lists that no one reblogs or likes and tell me they're all shit. I post my art and I barely break 20 notes. I write something and I get maybe 2 likes. I can't really answer any thoughtful asks because my mental state's been in the shitter for months. I desperately want to reply to the few sexuality asks I have and I physically can't. Being on my computer – after working ON a computer for my day job for 12 hour days everyday – feels like too much, so I try to limit my time on the blog now too.

I just try to keep carrying on, encouraged by the once-in-a-blue-moon testimonial ask I get thanking me for still being here. I thank YOU guys for reminding me that people still like coming here.

Stressed about money and food and rent just like everyone else, and just getting frustrated at other things.

And finally, my uncle (my dad's brother and my godfather) hasn't been doing well health-wise, and he's being moved to assisted living next week. His health has been declining since Easter, so it's been a bit of worrying time for relatives.

Having my therapist helps a lot. She talks me through a lot of my complicated feelings, my sense of self and ways to cope with my anxiety and stress. I'm talking to her again next week, so no worries, gang. As I said, I just keep on keeping on.

Some positivity though:

I booked next week off to try to just... recenter myself. To forget about everything and TRY to get back to doing the things I love. I will probably take a break from this blog as well during that time to limit my social-media time. It's not ideal but I need a break from my computer, I think.

I go to the gym a lot more these days, which has helped with the seething annoyance I constantly have at work. Usually feel better after it.

And because of the gym and getting out more, I've been slowly feeling better physically, better than I have since before 2019. The break from work is for the mental health, LOL.

I'm getting my hair recoloured next week. Can't afford it, really, but I just REALLY need to feel better about myself again, and I always feel so different when I colour my hair. I was doing so good for awhile. I want that again.

Anyway, I'm sorry to bombard y'all with my complicated mess of a brain. I really do appreciate you asking, so THANK YOU. I rarely get asked in real life if I am okay because I keep very private due to past people betraying my trust. And I don't like seeing people unhappy, so I feel if I tell people about my problems, then I feel I am a burden, so I just... continue existing.

Thank you for letting me be a burden just this once.

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

And now, it's time.

Day 5: Happy 5 Year Anniversary!

Wow. 5 years. I honestly can't believe that. Oh my GOSH that's long o.o. I went :O when I saw that when seeing advertising for the week.

I love this show so much (ignore me posting and editing to get it here before midnight for me lol). It's absolutely insane how long it's been. I started watching late in November, I believe, maaaaybe early December. We'd talked about getting Disney+, and I knew my family would find it silly but I was intrigued by a show called High School Musical: The Musical: The Series. A crazy title and a weird premise. I said I was just curious, fascinated by it, wondering what it would be like. So, one evening, my sister and I watched it.

We watched the first four episodes and laughed and made fun of it the whole time. But, miraculously, I found myself invested.

And the next episode.

In Season 1 Episode 5, they brought Seb and Carlos to us as a couple. I was shocked and happy, and honestly a little confused. I didn't know I was queer yet. I knew what queer was, had found out from my sibling surrounding some family stuff, but I'd never seen canon queer characters before. I guess I knew I was an ally, even if I didn't totally get why, but it was just so cool to see them. I honestly felt kind of weird because what did two gay high school boys mean to me, I was a straight girl!

Ha.

It wouldn't be for a couple more years that I would realize I was queer. I too fell victim to the "yeah, but I'm just an ally" trap lol. But I seriously fell in love with them. I remember my sibling and I loving how cute Carlos's little dance was, how excited he was. How devastated and in denial we were when Seb didn't show up. And how much we loved it when Carlos danced, and when Seb did show up :').

That solidified the show for me. That made me stay. They made me stay. They've meant the world to me ever since.

And since then, I have seen 33 amazing, wonderful episodes (just like the 5 before them lol). I've been angry, I've been sad, I've been in awe, I've been happy. I've seen myself represented not just in queer characters, but in theatre kids. In kids who are lonely and find family there. In kids who lived in a shadow, who were shy, who were thrust in and trusted by their teacher and director.

This show is silly. It does silly things, it has silly performances, it has silly jokes, silly unlikely things happen, and it's a silly premise. But I absolutely love it. I realized one day, after having seen someone mention "the One show that changed them forever", that mine was High School Musical The Musical The Series. Sounds silly, and I had to think about some of my more recent shows to figure it out. But it is. I remember scrolling through the tag, searching Seblos, before I even made a Tumblr account. Seeing things first after the finale of Season 1, deleted scenes pictures of Carlos giving Seb flowers. So many important moments for me were taken alongside step with HSMTMTS. Even though I barely post about it anymore (because so many interests catch my attention and I don't usually have much to say about it off the top of my head), it's still the 4th top "Posts a lot about" when you go to search on my blog. I think that says something. And I'm proud of it.

I haven't had a lot of interaction with the fandom during my time here, especially while the show was still running (and because I mainly stay in the Seblos tag, especially with remembering scrolling through all the Driver's License stuff before and when it first came out lol), but everyone means so much to me. Especially everyone still posting, still creating now. The fanfics, the art, the edits, and gifsets, everything is so important to me, and everything else. Thank you all <3. And thank you, when I did come, for being such an accepting place (at least the places I went to). Thank you guys for sticking around through this show, and even for just being here for a little while. Thanks for sticking with me, those that have :). And the friends I've made from this fandom and this show - you mean the world to me <3. Thank you all so much for everything you've done, everything that's made this show even more enjoyable :'). I love you all so much ❤️.

I love High School Musical: The Musical: The Series. And I'm proud and happy I do :).

Happy 5 Year Anniversary 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥰🥰🎊🎊🎉🎉🎂🎂🎂!!!!

[ghost-proofbaby]

nine people i'd like to know better

being a bit of a cheat since i haven't been keeping up with my notifs, and doing a nice little conglomeration of the tag games going around that both are regarding getting to know people better! thank you so much for tagging me @rosewaterandivy, @onegirlmanytales, and @emma-munson in these sweet fun games <3

favorite part of your daily routine?

probably checking in with all my friends, asking about their days and making sure they know i love them. that, or calling my pets stinky as i feed them first thing in the morning, and genuinely arguing with them as they meow/bark at me during the process

last song?

favourite lyrics right now?

"i'd give you my life, if you'd promise you want it." - black ice by maya hawke

favorite color?

a deep maroon or emerald/forest green. gimme allll the deep reds and pretty greens please

last three books (or fics) you've read

'if he had been with me' by laura nowlin (tiktok made me do it), 'my roommate is a vampire' by jenna levine (cute read), and then catching up on most of @icallhimjoey's fics (wes' way with words is driving me insane)

currently reading

'assistant to the villain' by hannah nicole maehrer (10/10 so far!)

relationship

painfully single. probably forever. it's cool. i'll just spill all the love i have to give into my friends' cups and my writing.

currently watching

i've started two different half-assed rewatches as of recent - strangers things, and the walking dead. the goal is to finally watch the entirety of the walking dead since i stopped around season 5? or just... whenever negan was introduced (yeah. yeah. that episode with glen. he was my favorite. i never watched another episode.)

last movie

i rewatched the entire og hunger games trilogy!!!!!

at a movie theater, which arm rest is yours?

the one closest to my friends, or the one farthest from strangers.

sweet/spicy/savory

gimme all the sweets as of recently, surprisingly. (i've never been much of a sweets person growing up)

last thing i googled

'weird old people smell' (please don't ask)

currently working on

a top secret thing that i haven't decided if it'll see the light of day yet. :pedrosmile:

what 'old person' things do you like?

well not their smell i'll tell you that i really love learning people's histories, or about their days. i'm a yapper. i love chatting with all the old people that come into my job.

vintage or new?

depends, but usually vintage.

are you scared of the dark?

yes, but also no. idk. it's a work in progress in my ripe old age of 24.

candles, essential oils or incense?

candles or incense. i do enjoy essential oils, but i never use them (outside of spellwork)! i love my incense quite a bit, but my roommates aren't overly fond of the smell most times haha

random fact/story you want to share about yourself?

i frequently keep small 'mourning' boxes for major times/changes in my life. i have one for my first love, one for my childhood pet, etc. i'll keep things like physical photographs, letters/notes people have written me, small tokens of defining moments, all that fun stuff. i don't open them very often, but i like having them there, in the back of my closet. always just in case.

jesus. that was terribly long and terribly boring. my bad!

i'm tagging @maladaptive-menace, @hellfire--cult, @emmaisgonnacry, @corroded-hellfire, @littlesubbyflower, and anyone else who wants to join in <3 no pressure to do so, of course!! i also have no idea who's been tagged already and who hasn't so my bad if you already have!

[phantomoftheorpheum]

any thoughts on the results of the poll? 🤍

a few! as usual, I'm going to place most of my thoughts under a cut, so as to not junk up people's dash.

so the final results were-

Faran - 10 votes (as you can see, one is me)

Mouse - 6 votes

Tabby - 5 votes

Imogen - 3 votes

Noa - 1 vote

Obviously, with only 25 votes, that's a super small sample size of the fandom. Ngl, I was surprised by the late surge Mouse had, after not getting any votes for hours, but that's cool to see (particularly since she hasn't had much of a storyline this season). There's obviously nothing scientific about this, since people who follow me are probably more likely to have similar tastes and interpretations, and while the poll was tagged and hopefully got some outside votes, I'm sure a different blog would get different results.

That being said, I think the fact that Faran led the entire 24 hours quite comfortably speaks to how many different elements of her character resonate with the audience. Some people told me that they relate to Faran's no-nonsense attitude, her perfectionism, her chronic pain or surgical trauma, her relationship with her parents, her dance background, etc. etc. I just think Faran has been a well written, well performed, and well rounded character.

Mouse came in second. I didn't get as many responses (public or private) about her, but someone did mention her tendency to hyper-fixate, which I also relate to, so I can definitely see where they're coming from. Personally, I'd like to see Mouse get a little more to do if we get a third season, but even her lack of screen time didn't stop y'all from saying you connect with her, so that makes me feel like she has a lot of potential.

Tabby was third, and she and Mouse traded 2nd and 3rd several times during the polling time, so they came very close to tying. No one told me why they voted for Tabby, so I don't have any external explanations. For me, the thing I most relate to with Tabby is her creativity and passion for film.

Imogen landed in fourth. At first, I was a little surprised, since she's at the center of the show so often. But I think Imogen's experiences are just a little less common. For example, becoming a teen mom (particularly in the traumatic way that she did) is something I suspect not too many of my followers relate to. So I think Imogen may genuinely be a little less "relatable" than most of the other characters, though I think she's well realized.

Noa came fifth. This wasn't a surprise, tbqh. I think if I'd done this poll in season 1, she might have been near the top. It seems to me that a lot of people feel at least a little confused with or disconnected from Noa's actions this season. I don't think this is mostly the character's fault. While her storyline would probably always be the type to divide audiences, personally, I feel that I do understand why she might be behaving the way she is (I wrote a thing about why I think I understand her draw to Jen over Shawn a while back, even if I'm not a big fan of this kind of romantic drama), but I am confused and frustrated by the way the show is choosing to handle it. I just feel that a lot of the production choices (writing, dialogue, cinematography, editing) are inconsistent in what they seem to be trying to express to the audience, and that does confuse me. I think that makes an inherently divisive storyline even more so.

I only got specific feedback about Faran and Mouse, so I can't tell you specifically why people voted for the other 3, but those are my feelings and some speculation!

[thewardenofwinter]

Nine People Tag

Hello! Returning for a short while now that my housing situation has cleared up a bit, so I'm starting off with an easy tag so I don't have to share my writing (mostly because I haven't been lmao). Thanks for the tag @rmgrey-author! You can find their og post here.

Gently tagging: @writernopal, @winterandwords, @rubywrite, @crowandmoonwriting, @elshells, and anyone else that wants to join!

Answers under the cut:

Three Ships

Alucard/Greta/Sypha/Belmont from the Castlevania netflix series. I don't care what people say, they all was fucking. I was SO scared during the last season when Greta was introduced that it would ruin my favorite throuple but she adds on PERFECTLY.

Ymir/Historia from Attack On Titan. Rewatched season 2 recently (the best season imo) and safe to say, I still love women. I am also mentally ill.

Ezio/Da Vinci from Assassin's Creed 2. Gayyy gayyy homosexual gayyyy.

Currently Listening

I am OBSESSED with Queens of the Stone Age's new album In Times New Roman that was released last month, particulary Obscenery and What The People Say (the song titles for this album are top tier btw.) I'm hoping to see them when they come to my town this September! Also Wasteland, Baby! as usual. Nothing has changed on that front.

Last Movie

Rewatched Underworld for the... millionth time.I recently bought the entire series on DVD because some old man with my EXACT movie taste died and donated all his mvies to Goodwill and I spent over 40 bucks on a shit ton of DVDs and a cool trenchcoat. Who let me have adult money?

Currently Reading

I recently picked up Three Dark Crowns by Kendare Blake, a really interesting fantasy novel since I've started a new fantasy project. (gasp). I really like the world building and prose so far so I hope the series is as good as this first book. There's also a LOT of books in this series so I might just read this one and call it quits depending on how it ends.

Currently Watching

Nothing at the moment, been too busy and stressed to consume any content other than my comfort movies haha. I'm not a big TV show watcher anyway, and when I do it's on 2x speed because theres no way I'm wasting an entire day to catch up with shows that have already started. #bringback30minuteepisodes

Currently Consuming

I am about to make some lavender early grey w/ milk. My favorite nighttime/fancy author drink.

Currently Craving

Attention.

[conjured-osteon]

Hiatus

{-Kicks rocks an mumble grumbles- I SWEAR this account was fully intended to have more activity but I'll be going on a Hiatus till further notice. If curious, I've added more under the cut but to keep it short'n'simple; Rough start to the year that only continued hasn't helped my creativity an instead stressed me out. (Triggers in the Tags, just in case.)}

{Starting this explanation on a softer note, I find myself having a hard time focusing on my lovely characters an this blog. Not to say I'm intending to get rid of it! But when you get nervous trying to reach out to others or don't get responded to it can be a bit disheartening an I never know what to do as a plan B. (Plus I know we all have lives outside of this. I'm just an unfortunately nervous person an sometimes the Logical Thinking gets bopped by the What If's) But I also have Bouncing Interests so at times my drive will go from full throttle to Zero without any warning because something else has gripped me like a vice.

I have been desperately wanting to work on the blog but as mentioned above, lack of interaction kills the motivation an leaves it kinda stressful cause I dunno what I can do to do better, especially when not wanting to be a pester or bother anyone. Otherwise I HAVE met some wonderful people who are a delight to chat/plot with and I am so, so, so sorry I've been inactive the past month :'D I take responsibility for that radio silence of mine.

And onto rougher notes... New Years Eve I had to say goodbye to my childhood dog. She lived a good, long life an it's still upsetting not seeing her around after nearly 15 years. Holidays already grate me so the addition only made it worse and then some other details surrounding it just, made it especially bitter for me. I've suffered depressing/anxiety fueling dreams involving her almost every night since. Following as a few days ago; one of my cats passed away. Another example of old age but losing a pet never comes any easier over the years.

Around December is when my mental state really started taking a nosedive, one I thought was going to be a temporary thing seeing as I was working odd hours for events from my usual shifts, not resting or eating properly Truth be told I'm bad at that in general bUT, grieving over the approaching vet visit on top of other stressors that came during the Holiday season. A part of the mindset I was thinking it would pass was due to the fact I don't register things that have happened/are happening immediately, an so I just guessed I was having one of my delayed responses from other things and handling present stress... Cept, it continued on in waves for several weeks in comparison to a day or two. Aaaand earlier today while I was working, I got so stuck in my own head, so tightly wound up by meaningless thoughts, arguments with not purpose and physically over stimulated into self directed aggression by getting MF'in' hiccups that I ended up reaching out to a Cr!s!s Hotline when I found I couldn't even make myself contact friends/family. My strongest Rational and Logical Thought was I needed to talk to someone before my predicament made itself truly hazardous. Immediately after, I called my partner so he'd be aware. I'm doing better at the current moment, quite chilled out actually an I fully intend to bring this all up with my Therapist this week.

I hate worrying others and I falter to express what's going on due to the always hovering thought of I'm just looking for attention, or I'll be ruining another person's day because I'm being a child. Something I've struggled with for a long time that I'm hoping-- Trying, very hard to work through.

Soooo yeah- I guess this is me saying I need to step back for my mental health. I'm still so bummed out by having to do this but I really, really want this to be a fun space I can look forward too at the end of my day without my own nagging negativities getting in the way of it.

DMs will continue to be open but I'll be much more MIA from here than I was prior, this time with reason behind it.}

[horizon-forbidden-sheesh]

Writing Process: Drafting

Sooooo, I started drafting Part 2 almost immediately after Part 1 concluded—and by now I've abandoned my Scrivener file entirely and am doing everything in Google Docs. (I talk about my switch from Scrivener to Google, here. ⚙️)

This time, I didn't have all the journal entries to work from, either. I was starting entirely from a blank slate. So at first, I just let myself WRITE. All the scenes I was most excited about, in no particular order, just to squeeze all the juice out.

I did that for like a month. And then, when I had about 15-20k words of random bits and bobs, I started to put them in order, and develop a through-line. That's where the draft docs & trackers came in.

✏️ Away from Scrivener, I needed some extra organizational tools to house my more general notes, research, & scraps. So, I built this li'l cutie with easy links to all my Google draft files, and included a brief summary that helped me greatly when plotting out the next set 10 chapters for Part 2:

*The chapter titles were updated as my outline changed, but the summaries did not! The descriptor for Chapter 20 is now, like, Chapter 23.

Keeping the descriptors short really helps me stay on task. If I have so much I need to cover in a chapter that it drops my formatting to the next line, I know I probably won't be able to cover everything in ~3,000-5,000 words.

✏️ Now, that's just the first page of the "Table of Contents." As of today, it's 13 pages long, and it also houses a TON of notes and working drafts and snippets of dialogue that I am saving for future, as-yet-unspecified chapters.

It's really messy—and sometimes when I'm out & about and my service is shit, I whip open my old Notes app, just to get a thought down. Here, have a taste of what's been rattling around in my brain...

Dialogue often starts as just the dialogue. I layer in tags & descriptors later, during the editing process. Most of the conversations I've written started with me talking to myself alone in the car, in the shower, or while washing dishes. (This works for copywriting too. My best ideas almost NEVER come to me while I'm sitting-down-looking-at-a-screen. Of course.)

For instance, that same conversation made it from the Notes app into a Google Doc and has since evolved to:

A li'l somethin-somethin from the upcoming Scorcher Season's Chapter 24 🔥

✏️ Once I've got all the major plot points written, I'll go back and write the "boring" stuff in chronological order. Okay, it's not really boring. It's just the filler information that helps a reader get from point A to point B, and I edit as I go. This ends up being like half of the total word count for the full 10 Chapters.

I'm currently hitting this point in Part 3—and you can see below that just writing my favorite parts here and there gets me pretty far on its own. Over the last 3 weeks, I've nearly exhausted my imagination developing the general story arc. Next up, I'll go back and start fleshing out each chapters one by one.

Wanna know something CRAZY?? Over the last ~year, I've noticed that I tend to write nonstop during Mercury Retrogrades. Like, I don't want to do anything else. I'm learning not to schedule any major projects for these ~3 week periods, so I don't blow my deadlines on account of being too obsessed with my fanfic to bother. 😅

After my decision to expand to 4 Parts total, my original ToC Doc got a bit... top heavy. (Also, I got really tired of manually calculating all the word counts.) So, instead of continuing in Docs, I added a tab to my spreadsheet:

*Hiding my chapter summaries so as not to spoil!! 😈

As you can see, I fill in the links as I create the draft docs... and I've already had to split a chapter in half due to scale, so the untitled <Scorcher 7> dropped to Part 4. I'm hopeful I won't have to split any more, so I can end strong on 'Ten Days.'

I don't usually start the finale until the very end, because I've learned that the wonderful comments I receive will sometimes give me extra ideas that I want to ensure make it into the fic!

✏️ Around the time I've fully completed the first 5 chapters, I'll give myself the green light to start posting. That leaves me just enough runway to finish out the rest of the season, and posting on a timeline helps keeps me motivated & accountable!

This is getting kinda long, so I'll write about Trackers & Timelines I've developed along the way in another post.

Thanks for being here! 🖤

xo, Sheesh.

[myawesomebbblog]

love making a positive post about Kyland and the moment i go on the bb23 tag for the first time i see that yet again another man is a disappointment 😭

anyway this is my apology post pls disregard my last one

[only-in-december]

I was bored, so I thought it might be fun to recommend some fics! How will I be doing this you might ask, well by rating them on a scale of 1-10 Of course!

(I would tag the authors of all these fics, but I don't know if they all even have Tumblr. So, if you notice an author that I didn't tag, feel free to tag them for me. I'd love for them to see my random opinions on why they're amazing.🙂🙂)

Without further ado; Rating Some of My (current) Favorite Fics. (By fandom)

Spoiler Warnings for some of these fics. I'll try to add individual Spoiler Warnings for the fics that need them, but here's a blanket warning.

Danny Phantom:👻

Intervention by AgentIanLegend 8½/10

Reason: Good Dad Jack Fenton!!! Oh how I love a good fic where Jack shows he's a competent man and father. This is a top teir example of what that looks like. One of my favorites. It makes me happy🙂

👻👻👻

Unveiled by DarkNymfa 9/10

Reason: I have so many emotions with this one! It's got Jack being a good dad, and a smart guy. It shows the betrayal Jack feels at finding out about Vlad. It's a good read. The writing is wonderful, and the characters are well written. (Sorry if that doesn't make sense) In all, I can't recommend this one enough.

👻👻👻

Here I Sit Alone by Deaths_mortal_enemy 11/10

Reason: Okay. I might be biased for this one since @deaths-true-mortal-enemy wrote it specifically for me....but it's short and sweet. It gives an interesting and unique spin on the concept of Space!Danny. It shows how big and vast and empty space can be, with wonderful descriptions and a melancholy tone. I love it.💙

👻👻👻

Mutant by DP_Marvel94 7/10

Body Horror TW

Reason: If you're reading Danny Phantom fanfiction, and you've never read anything by @dp-marvel94 them what are you doing with your life? I don't usually read body horror fics, cause horror in general isn't my thing. But this fic is kind of the exception. I really enjoyed it, even if I was cringing a little. (Sympathy cringe. Not a bad cringe. It was a REALLY good fic.)

●●●

Perry Mason: 📑

Burger's ABCs by Deaths_mortal_enemy 9/10

Reason: It’s unfinished...(I'm looking at you for that @deaths-true-mortal-enemy 👀) But it's a fun collection of drabbles about everyone's favorite DA, Hamilton Burger. And I love that. It's a very cute fic.

📑📑📑

The Case of the Chance Meeting by Kitsune_Scribe 9/10

Reason: I don't read many ship-fics. They just aren't my thing. But, I make an exception for Burger/Della fics. And this one does not disappoint. I loved every second of it. It's adorable. There's stargazing, snow, and just cozy vibes. Honestly, I think that if you're looking to check out this ship, this might be the perfect first fic for it.💙

●●●

Star Trek:✨️

(TNG) and i only sink deeper the deeper i think by thunder_and_stars 7/10

Spoilers: Through Season 1 of TNG

Reason: Set during and right after Riker was grabbed by the alien monster in "Skin of Evil," this one shows the panic and fear that Will must have been going through. Honestly, I loved it. Riker is one of my favorites, and it's hard to find really good fics that center around him. So it was nice to find this one. The writing was really good. The emotions were running high. Would recommend.👌🏻

✨️✨️✨️

(Kelvin Timeline/AOS) In Good Hands by Aini_NuFire 8½/10

TW Injury Descriptions and blood (not super graphic, but I prefer to err on the side of caution)

Reason: Hurt Bones. Who doesn't love some good old fashioned hurt Bones? The writing is really good, and I'm always a sucker for Jim and Spock caring for Bones. If you don't like the thought of giant scorpions though, you may want to skip this one.

●●●

Stargate:🌊

Endless Fascination by badly_knitted 9/10

Spoilers: Through Season 6 of SG1.

Reason: I love Jonas Quinn. I don't care if he's only on one season. He's a great character. This fic is short and fun. It shows Jonas' love for the weather channel and his interest in Earth culture.

🌊🌊🌊

Survivor's Guilt by ChronicBookworm 8/10

Spoilers: Through Season 6 and seasons 9/10 of SG1.

Reason: Jonas' reaction to Langara's destruction by the Ori. If Jonas never left, and had to deal with the knowledge that his homeworld was just...gone. The dynamic between Jonas and Daniel is amazing. (Always a fun dynamic if you ask me) The writing is really good. The characters are believable. All in all a really good fic and enjoyable read.

🌊🌊🌊

Five things SG1 won't do, no matter what by ivorygates 7/10

Spoilers: Through Season 9 of SG1

Reason: This is a very interesting look into the psyche of each of the members of SG1 in Seasons 9 and 10. I love the introspective nature of it. It feels very in character (which is always a plus.) It's short and sweet, at only 462 words. I really like this one a lot. :)

•

•

•

•

I may add on to this post later if I find more fics that I absolutely adore. But for now, I'm going to say that's all. 💙💙

[thegeminisage]

ASK MEME

i got tagged by @runawaymarbles, tyvm i lov doing these

What book are you currently reading?

no books atm but i'm actually getting through the entire tag of a rarepair from ff13...only 41 fics :(

What’s your favorite movie you saw in theatres this year?

did i go to a theater this year...? surely at least once. OH YEAH i went to see sonic 2. since that's the only movie i saw in theaters this year that'll be my favorite one

What do you usually wear?

comfy-at-home clothes: tank top, shorts, no-show socks, hair fork, & bandana. out & about clothes: bandana & hair fork if i'm working or my hair needs washing, otherwise i keep it loose. a lot of black pants/shorts and bright glittery monochrome or tye-dye tank tops w/ black or rainbow choker, rainbow earrings, pride bracelet, smiley face ring, rainbow ring, ace ring, and sometimes my triforce necklace. if it's cold i will also wear rainbow arm warmers/socks and fingerless gloves with the pink peace symbols on them. if i'm REALLY dressing up i will wear rainbow tights under a long shirt or short dress. wow sorry this is the longest answer so far i just really love bright fashion!!! i can't believe god nerfed me by making plus sized clothes fucking suck so bad

How tall are you?

5’1 :/

What’s your Star Sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event?

i think i'm actually a cancer LMFAO. and stuck with this username...idk about any celebrities but my birthday IS on the summer solstice which is absolutely bitchin' in my professional opinion. i could not possibly have asked for a better date although i do wish it didn't have to fall on father's day sometimes

Do you go by your name or a nick-name?

i go by liz which is not my legal first name. technically my legal middle name isn't liz either it's like elizabeth obviously but my first name is cringefail and nobody can spell it OR say it so i just don't tell most people what it is lol. i started going by liz when i was in 8th grade and sometimes my mom STILL messes it up...

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child?

no BUT as a kid i really really really really REALLY wanted pink hair. as an adult no one can stop me. kid me would be so jealous of adult me's look in EVERY way

What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at?

good at: dreaming. you know how in the 40s-60s most people dreamed in black and white because that was how tv looked? apparently if you play enough video games you'll get so good at controlling a simulated environment you can simply wake up on command. i never completely mastered lucid dreaming but it's a neat trick anyway. bad at: sleeping. exhibit a: i am answering this meme at 2:30 in the fucking morning, and i have not had 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep since december 10. that's like 28 days!

Dogs or cats?

CATS!!!!!!! i like dogs too tho

What’s something you would like to create stuff for?

i would love to draw some zelda art. i just need a new tablet sadly none of the old ones work with my pc

If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favourite picture/favourite line/favourite etc. from something you created this year?

UGH i can't post it, it's in the undisclosed project

What’s something you’re currently obsessed with?

so a very long time ago when we were teenagers my brother showed me minecraft. i played half an hour of it and then gave the controller back and told him i couldn't keep going because i would quite literally never put it down if i did. unfortunately i did NOT show that same level of foresight and self-restraint when downloading the demo of SLIME RANCHER. in my defense i was utterly unprepared for its sheer potency. i played exactly four minutes of the demo before i caved and bought it - $5 was a steal - without realizing how absolutely lethal it is to combine adhd with a farming sim especially during seasonal depression months. this thing has been churning out dopamine so fast my stupid little rat brain can't keep up. i'm frying every last pleasure receptor i ever had as thoroughly as i possibly can. i am begging one of you to physically come to my house and uninstall it from my pc.

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?

andor 🙏 sorry to all andor enjoyers but it fucking sucked (except for the prison break)

What’s a hidden talent of yours?

i'm freakishly good at packing things. items into boxes, boxes into vehicles, organizing drawers and closets, etc. at my house we call it "tetrising" since i guess that's a pro gamer move that translates to the real world..................

Are you religious?

no i am disqualified for being gay <3

What’s something you wish to have at this moment?

a completed copy of this photo album i'm supposed to be making. i got behind bc i was playing slime rancher :(

ok im tagging @slaygentford @maulthots @brownbicon @machidielontheway @paty-ofarrell @ozymandiasdirge @moogleterra @marcelgerard @elsa12tmnt @smellslikebot @youngbenkenobi and anyone else who wants to do it, do it & say i tagged you!!

[goth-albino-angel]

Yugiri's smile is everything. She has so many of them and they all mean different things. When she's relaxed, when she's excited, when she's confused, when she has no clue what's going on but everyone else is happy so she's happy, when she's relieved, when she's proud... She has so many different smiles and if Tumblr didn't have the 10 image rules, I would absolutely gush about every single one of them in detail. Unfortunately, if I do that, all of those posts will probably be eaten out of the tag, so instead, here are my top 10 favorite Yugiri smiles so far, images included. (Pre-Revenge episode 9)

10. Season One, Episode 2: The First Smile/ 9. Season One, Episode 10: The Sentimental Smile

Episode 2 is the first time we ever see Yugiri smile. Before this, she seemed relatively nonplussed or generally disinterested in pretty much everything going on. Even though she was in a different time period with complete strangers and a madman demanding her to be something she has no knowledge of, she was fairly calm. Then the first time we see her smile, it's when she sees something completely familiar. Her own face. Not only that, but she directs that smile toward the character that is going to become basically her little sister. The first one means so much and it's so important.

Within the same vein, her smile to Kotaro in episode 10 is one during an emotionally heavy moment. It's the first time he's hit an actual snag in his plans. Sakura's singular focus on the Arpino show rather than on the bigger picture of the group as a whole would have been a massive roadblock had she not realized her mistake.

Yugiri is the only one who properly realizes the reason they were sent into the mountains in the first place. Instead of simply sitting on the information, she's proactive about it and actually goes to discuss the problem with Kotaro. She wants to understand his reasoning so that she might be able to help him. And when she turns toward him, she also gives him the observations she's witnessed throughout her new life. This smile may be low on my list of favorites, but it's still unbelievably important.

...Also, when they released the preview image of this smile, my brain short-circuited for ten minutes, so it had to make it onto the list regardless.

8. Season Two, Episode One: The Professional Smile

This smile isn't much out of the ordinary for what we've come to expect of Yugiri, but it's on here because this was our first look at Yugiri after basically two years of very little. None of us knew how the group would come back, how the writing team had incorporated the unexpected pandemic, how things would play out, or what would be happening. The Promo showed Tae's hand flying off to knock off Sakura's head, but as 2018 displayed, the promos can't always be trusted. This showed that, even in this new world where she's only been awake for a year, she's putting her skills to use and working just as hard as the others. Thanks to the conversation from Episode 10 of the first season, we know she was trained as a geisha which would make service work much easier than it would be for the other girls.

I don't have too much to say on this one, to be honest. I do like that she's in softer lighting, as opposed to the others who were all surrounded by harsh lighting on their season two introductions. The softer lighting lends itself well to the lack of pigment and coloration in the girls' makeup, allowing Yugiri to look like she has some color, even if she still looks somewhat pale and tired. It doesn't give her quite the same sickly look the others have at their jobs. The red dress? 100/10. Perfect decision.

7. Season One, Episode Five: The Proud Smile

SHE. DOES. GYMNASTICS. She has every right to this smile! I did the math for this specific part of the episode and Yugiri got third place. The judges liked her rope aerobics so much, they shot her all the way to third place even though her distance was zero meters. It wouldn't have gotten her interviewed, but it would have at least put Franchouchou at the forefront. I still applaud Tae snagging first place, but Yugiri deserves some praise. She really did go face first into the mud on a bike and said, "Never again." She's so proud of herself. I'll be gushing about the actual gymnastics part in a different post a little later, too, but she definitely deserves to be proud of herself. I'm really gay...

6. Season One, Episode Four: The Cute Smile

Originally, this was just going to be me doing some keysmash version of a squeal or something, but there's something I'd like to draw attention to. I'm pretty sure that, by this point, Franchouchou only knows two songs. Yomigaere, which was supposed to be performed in episode 2, and Mezame Returner, which is what's being performed here. Of these two, Yugiri has more experience with this one, but from what the audience had been shown, it wasn't good experience.

Memorizing the lyrics would have been the easy part for her. It's that a good portion of the dance practice was also spent helping Lily get the steps down and potentially calming her frustrations. Then the performance itself would have been a complete disaster if Junko and Ai hadn't gotten over themselves at the last minute to finally help.

This is the first successful performance of Mezame Returner we're witnessing and it's clear the group's had more practice since then. You can see how excited and happy Yugiri is here because this one is actually going well. They had a bit more time to prepare, the two lead roles were actually involved this time, and the audience also was clearly enjoying the performance. She's so happy and it's just so heart-warming to see. Yes, even with the CGI. Don't @ me, she looks adorable.

5. Season One, Episode Seven: The Sassy Smile

This one also was just going to be a squealing keysmash thing, but again, I have something to point out. Look how much more confident she is now that Junko and Ai have, once again, gotten over themselves. Yugiri sees the effect that Junko stepping in had on the others and just like the rest of the group, her movements are more relaxed and free.

It's more obvious, actually, if you look at the way the other girls are moving directly after Junko helps Ai up in comparison to how Yugiri is moving. She did a spin while waiting for Sakura and Lily to finish their segment, and she could be cheeky during her own. She sensed that the tension had mostly dissolved and because of that, she allowed herself to relax and could properly throw herself into the performance. When she throws out this smile and wink, it's not actually directed at the audience. It's Yugiri telling the others that they've got this without breaking the performance.

4. Season Two, Episode Four: The Gentle Smiles

I put both of these here because Yugiri's just... so... caring? So much of what she does is passive that you don't realize just how much work she puts into relieving the stress from the other girls until long after the problem has been resolved.

In the first, she's speaking to Sakura. No doubt, Yugiri probably noticed how worried Sakura was about Junko. Even though Sakura was trying not to let the others catch on just how anxious she really was, Yugiri still knew that something was bothering Sakura as well as Junko. Yugiri knew that the key to easing Junko's mind lay in placating Sakura first. She's seen what happens to them all when they fall apart and she wants to avoid that at all costs. So, Yugiri lifts Sakura's spirits and gives her back the fire and determination to make a great performance.

In the second, Yugiri is watching Junko eat. Unlike the others, it's clear Yugiri knows that Junko is in much higher spirits than when last they saw her. Junko would likely have still been a stuttering, quivering mess otherwise, but she wasn't stuttering and her actions were purposeful and self-assured. Yugiri is very observant. She would have caught on that something had happened to make Junko feel better. What makes this smile even better is that she's not the least bit disappointed. The reason she made dinner was to help Junko, but she doesn't view the meal as a waste of time. She's so focused on other people, that she's happy Junko is feeling better at all and even offers her different platters to help keep her mood up.

These are high on the list for two reasons. One, they're a show of just how much Yugiri does for her girls. Two, YUGIRI COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS HEADCANON CONFIRMED BITCHEEEESSS!!! I GOT ONE RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!!

3. Season Two, Episode Six: The Affectionate Smile

I will be completely honest, I have no idea why this one is as high as it is. I admit, I did spend three hours replaying this single thirty second scene because it's really sweet and Yugiri and Tae don't interact very often, so seeing Yugiri not only be worried for Tae, but also be immediately reassured that Tae would be fine was just something my heart didn't know it needed until it had it. The sheer level of affection Yugiri shows toward Tae is too adorable. Especially since Yugiri usually only has moments like those with Sakura and, to a lesser extent, Lily. This smile's really cute, it's in the middle of a wholesome scene, and it made me love both Yugiri and Tae that much more.

2. Season One, Episode Three: The Excited Smile

Once again, an entry that was going to be a simple squealing keysmash until I realized there was something to point out here as well. This is the first smile we ever see from Yugiri that's genuinely enthusiastic. She has plenty of them, especially during her performances, but this is our first time seeing her fully incorporate herself into the group as an actual member and actually look excited to do something with the others. This was an omen of adorable things to come and damn did it deliver.

Honorable Mentions.

I'm only going to touch on each of these briefly because to be honest, there are a LOT of smiles I could've picked.

The first one is from episode 6 when the group is talking about their very first meet-and-greet. Lily asks Yugiri if she's keeping up okay, and Yugiri remarks that she's taking things as they come. This was a small look into the kind of character she is. As I mentioned before, she's very passive in the way she operates, but that's to the benefit of those she cares for. This is her admitting that she doesn't want to be a problem and it's just sweet that even though Lily is worried about her, Yugiri's still highkey thinking about everyone else.

To the right is a shot of Yugiri during Electric Returner. This one is just the squealing keysmash because she looks so genuinely ecstatic, it's contagious. She's NO DAMN CLUE what happened or why they sound so different, but she is absolutely living her best second life.

The next shot comes from the beginning of Yomigaere and is somewhat of a repeat of the above. She's excited to perform for such a big crowd, she's glad Sakura finally agreed to actually participate, and she's living her best second life. Whoever animates Yugiri's CG model? I love you. I want to send you a gift basket. She's always so happy during performances.

Then comes her smile after the group finds out Sakura's memories are back. She's just glad Sakura, her Sakura, has come back to them, that she accepts her crap luck and is still willing to stay. For Yugiri, this goes under the list of Best Possible Outcomes. Her family is whole again and she's so relieved.

Last in the top row is the first full frontal shot we get of Yugiri in the Saga Jihen music video. She's so unbelievably adorable here. I wish I could've gotten her first expression, but the curtain was still rising and without photoshop, I'm not editing an image to the degree needed to get her whole face lightened. Point is, she's cute and everyone deserves to see her adorable face on the first song she got to be center for.

First on the bottom row is Yugiri looking apologetic from episode 8 of Revenge. She's so cute. It was an honest mistake and she had no way of knowing the paper belonged to Kiichi. No doubt, that was probably why she offered to help him rewrite them later.

Next is how cute she looks in big sister mode. She's wiping the mud from Kiichi's cheeks and is taking such care with him. Throughout the entire episode, she treats him like a little kid and it's likely because her role was big sister for so long that she doesn't know how not to treat him that way. It really does shed light on just how kind she is to everyone, though, that she doesn't even think about her dirty kimono and focuses on cleaning him up a little first.

Then we have her smiling at Kiichi as she remarks on how beautiful his dream of reviving Saga is. She even says she hopes it comes true. His dream means something to her. She can't even fully see it, he can't even fully see it, but they don't need to. What Itou didn't understand this whole time is something Yugiri understood immediately just from listening to Kiichi talk. They don't need to see it in their minds, all they need is to feel it in their hearts, and that's something Yugiri knows.

And lastly on the honorable mentions, because this post is already super long, Yugiri smiling while she's cooking for her guests. It was a tossup between this or the pinwheel because it's just really nice that Yugiri can simply enjoy mundane things. I chose this one because it's a direct contrast to how she was at the beginning. Before, she ate with a disinterested expression, but now, she's cooking for guests rather than just for herself. The lift in her mood is obvious, and it's something so small but so heartwarming, I couldn't resist.

I would've put the pinwheel moment anyway, but unfortunately, as a com major, formatting and design are everything and an extra picture on the top or bottom without a balancer would've thrown the whole thing off. Maybe next time.

NOW FOR NUMBER ONE

1. Season Two, Episode Eight: The Softest Smile

This should have been expected. There's something genuinely touching about the fact that Yugiri really does give her everything, even to complete strangers. These girls barely know her, everyone in town barely knows her, but because her dance students suggested Yugiri go out and actually experience, Yugiri gives it actual thought. She doesn't dismiss them, she doesn't deride them, she doesn't make them feel foolish or anything like that. She treats their suggestion the same way she would if it had come from a close friend. And she does actually take them up on it.

Later, we see her come into contact with Kiichi to demonstrate that even full-on strangers aren't exempt from her kind heart, but this means more. All we know is that these girls take Yugiri's dance class, and from the way they speak when we first meet them, it's clear Yugiri has a professional wall between herself and those she instructs. But she still treats them as she would the girls back in Shimabara. It's proof that, even in the past, Yugiri really was just as kind-hearted as in the present. It's a show don't tell kind of thing that just speaks so deeply to the writer in me. I love this smile. It's everything. Her smiles are everything. She's everything.

[ownedbybooks]

End of Year Reading Tag 📚

I was tagged on my main account by @therefugeofbooks so I thought "what a better way to start my new bookblr blog, then through my 2021 readings?". Thanks for the tag, Caah! <3

Let's go to the questions:

did you reach your reading goal for the year (if you had one)?

No, I didn't :( But I almost reached it! My goal was to read 55 books and I finished 2021 by reading 44 books. I was happy, though, because I've read 40+ books!

what are your top 3 books you read this year?

The Song of Achilles, by Madeline Miller;

La vie devant soi, by Romain Gary;

Time's Divide, by Rysa Walker.

what’s a book that you didn’t expect to enjoy quite so much going in?

Proteja-me, by Mila Wander & Josy Stoque. It was clearly from the beginning that it was a more madure and erotic book. And even though i like the spicy scenes, till this book I haven't found one that had a really good plot, characters and writing. So I started reading it with precaution, knowing it was going to be hard to me to like it. But, surprisingly, IT WAS EVERYTHING I WANTED. The writing was great, the characters had depth, the plot was more than the "i want to fuck her/him", it had drama, it discussed important topics, it had emotional growth, the majority of the female characters respected each other (even though they might despise each other at some points). Great, great, great reading!

were there any books that didn’t live up to your expectations?

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, by Robert Louis Stevenson. I think that great part was from the fact that I already knew major spoilers about it, because of pop culture references. But still, I was hoping I was going to enjoy the read a bit more.

did you reread any old faves? If so, which one was your favourite?

I did reread some books, but none were previously my favourites. I don't even know if I can considere one of them my favourite rereads of 2021 ahhahah Maybe Glass Sword, by @vaveyard since I decided to finish the whole series and for that I needed to reread the first 2 volumes :)

did you dnf any books?

Only the ones I couldn't finish before the new year arrived (but spoiler: i already finished one of them):

Making and Breaking the Grid: A Graphic Design Layout Workshop, by Timothy Samara;

Broken Throne, by @vaveyard

did you read any books outside your usual preferred genre(s)?

Even though I LOVE Historical Romance movies and tv shows, I'm not very used to it as a book genre.

So, after binge watching the first whole season of Bridgerton on 2020, I decided to read the first book of the series: The Duke and I, by Julia Queen. I thought it was okay (apart from a specific scene), but still I feel I'm not 100% used to this genre.

what was your predominant format this year?

Well… e-book and digital reading. Even thought I've read a lot of physical books, e-book was 50% of my most read format.

what’s the longest book you read this year?

Horror Clássico, a 3-in-1 ebook: it has together Frankenstein, The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and Dracula. I am now considering myself an gothic literature affectionate hahhaha

what are your top 3 anticipated 2022 releases?

I'm not much in touch with releases… So I don't know…

what books from your tbr did you not get to this year, but are excited to read in 2022?

I don't normally do TBRs, only during read-a-thons. But I'm going to answer this question based on my "Want to Read" pile from Goodreads (which for me is kinda like a TBR):

Oscar et la dame rose, by Éric-Emmanuel Schmitt;

The Mirror & the Light, Hilary Mantel (I have even already bought it!);

The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes, by Suzanne Collins;

Clockwork Angel, by Cassandra Clare;

The Hobbit, by J. R. R. Tolkien

[trevor-wilson-covington]

The Possibilities...Part 2

// After the last post of the CD covers I did went over so well with y’all, I decided to do the other 13 songs in the show and added in some character themed ones as well. Hope y’all like these ones as much as you did the last batch. I have 20, so they’ll be in 2 separate posts! 😊😄

** I also gave little descriptions for each cover to explain why I chose a certain pic, how I came up with the character or band specific logo in the top corner, and/or any other needed explanations (like college age looking characters or what’s up with Caleb).**

PART 1

~ For this one, I was deciding between a neon sign of a rainbow or going for a more generic picture of someone on a cliff side for lyrics like “That we're standing on the edge of...Something big, something crazy...Our best days are yet unknown...That this moment is ours to own...'Cause we're standing on the edge of great”. In the end, I liked the rainbow neon heart the most because it felt like it connected with lyrics “Shout, shout...C'mon and let it out, out...Don't gotta hide it...Let your colors blind their eyes...Be who you are, no compromise” really well. 

Logo: The band logo inside a Dahlia, which, depending on the CD cover, changes color to fit its background better

~ This cover I looked forward to as I worked on all the other ones, as I had found this art back when I was doing aesthetic/mood boards of the songs late last year. It is an amazing fit for the song and the control Caleb and his curse have over the boys as they perform it, a puppet master controlling his puppets for his own gain. 

Logo: Took the logo I had done my best to recreate for OSOH and used it here

~ Finally, for this one I had between stuck between doing this flower (or weed, idek) picture or one of 3 options of ones with trees that were miraculously still standing in the middle of a lake or in a foggy field. All encapsulated the feeling of standing strong and lyrics like “Even if I'm the last standing...I'ma stand tall...I'ma stand tall” very well, but a mutual and I decided the flower best represented Julie and the incredible strength/bravery she showcased going up on that stage and performing without the boys. Like the flower, Julie was persevering and deciding even without her band, her family, by her side she would “keep on going when it's all falling apart” because she’s “gotta keep on dreaming...’gotta catch that feeling" like the strong, amazing performer she is and always has been. 

Logo: The band logo inside a Dahlia, matching the color of the flower, Julie, because they’re a family now  

~ For Julie and the rest of the teens, I decided that it would be alright to age up because trying to find an exact match to their ages and looks using the resources I had was going to be practically impossible. This pic I had used for a Julie/Rose, mother-daughter mood board last year and thought it would work great here. (If i did do something wrong with this representation of Julie in regards to skin tone, let me know)

Logo: The same thing, Julie’s initials inside a Dahlia, that I used in Part 1 of this post set for songs she performed alone

~ I had a few options for a Luke pic, including 2 that ended up being too Charlie for this post, but when I found this pic I thought this would work best. Trying to find a pic that captures his hair, the beanie, and his style while also somewhat resembling Luke is stressful and impossible without likely losing my mind in the process. So, I decided a vague resemblance would work and decided to use my artistic license to say this is how I am choosing to represent our ghost himbo leading singer. The beanie felt right and not having the person’s whole face visible allowed for use of the imagination and for that air of mystery Luke aims to give off. 

Logo: I made a special logo for Luke of his initials in the same font as I used for them in the PH cover logo, but for this logo decided to put them atop a journal to represent the one he writes all his songs in and holds as sacred and many times off-limits to others      

~ For Alex, I also had a hard time finding a close enough match that worked to represent him through hair, clothing, or even stature. I ended up finding this pic, of an actor from Outer Banks I believe, that seemed to fit the Alex vibe well enough to me, despite not have any of those matching clothing items or a perfect match for hairstyle. 

Logo: For this one I went with the expected, default fanny pack with his initials on it because there wasn’t quite any other sticker options on the site I use for these that screamed Alex and the fanny pack is intrinsic to his character (and we love it)

~ Now for Reggie, I was able to find a pic that had both his look and allowed for him to have an instrument, even if I couldn’t for the other 2 himbos. It’s a pic of a member of The Neighbourhood performing and the leather jacket/white shirt, hair, and what I believe is a bass guitar fit with Reggie so well. I had 2 options of pics of this band member from 2 angles, but ended up deciding this one looked best. 

Logo: A cowboy on a horse to represent Reggie and his country music career dreams, plus ‘Home Is Where My Horse Is’, with his initials in a fitting font over it  

~ While I was hesitant to use a pic of 2 girls on the ‘Flying Solo’ cover in an attempt to not unintentionally represent Madi and Jadah’s skin tones wrong, for this one just aiming to represent Flynn by herself I did my best to find a pic of a girl that not only got Flynn’s hair as we see it in the show represented but also had a close match to her/Jadah’s skin tone. Here’s to hoping I did her justice (but if I still did do something wrong with this representation of Flynn in those regards, let me know)! I thought the outfit, while not as eclectic as Flynn’s on the show, worked well for a casual look for Flynn in like Senior year of high school or even college, since the pics age all these characters up a bit. 

Logo: For the logo I went with a turntable sticker and Flynn’s initials, including letters for ‘no last name’ as people have used for her in post tags, until we learn of a last name for her hopefully in the future

~ While looking for neon sign pics for other CD covers in this post set I came across many with people in them, a handful that also would have worked for Carrie, before finding this one among them. I loved the neon glow off the girl and the close match, as far as I can tell in the lighting, to Carrie/Savannah’s strawberry blonde hair. The outfit, similar to Flynn’s, works for end of high school or during college, where Carrie might dress in toned down versions of her usual style, we see her in during the show. The piercing and more carefree demeanor being effects of her letting go of the image she hid behind in HS and becoming a more authentic Carrie. 

Logo: I chose to put her initials over a diamond both because I wanted to use a diamond like I almost did for the pic in the ‘WOW’ cover and because of the diamond’s symbolism of things like strength/power, creativity, and balance/clarity

~ Finally, for Caleb I had originally had a sepia colored picture of a magician looking guy in a top hat looking out onto the ocean or some body of water with his back to the camera...then I found this one. My mutual, who has been helping me with this post set, and I nicknamed him ‘Sexy Caleb’! He just gives off that suave, over-the-top magician vibe that is kinda Caleb’s thing. Since the rest of the characters were merely resemblance pics of the characters, I thought why not just go that route with Caleb’s and have fun with it. This was the result and I hope y’all enjoy it as much as I do! 

Logo: Went with the default sticker of a top hat for Caleb’s logo because it just works so well to represent him and the added initials on it almost look like goggles, like he wears in the very last scene of the season

[theteaisaddictive]

finally fall book tag

got tagged by @cinderellasfella -- thanks, conor!

1. In fall, the air is crisp and clear: name a book with a vivid setting!

one that really sticks out to me right now is The Poppy War by R. F. Kuang, a fantasy grimdark re-imagining of China during the Second Sino-Japanese War. the setting, while clearly inspired by real history, also stands on its own two feet regarding class interplay, religions inspired by chinese myth, and how the characters relate to their setting

2. Nature is beautiful… but also dying: name a book that is beautifully written, but also deals with a heavy topic like loss or grief.

one of my favourite heavy books is Deerskin by Robin McKinley, which is a retelling of the fairytale Donkeyskin and comes with a massive trigger warning for rape and incest. it's not just the subject matter itself, but the way that she puts the herione back together again afterwards that makes up the bulk of the book and is written beautifully and sensitively

3. Fall is back to school season: share a non-fiction book that taught you something new.

i recently finished Revolting Prostitutes by Molly Smith and Juno Mac, which argues for the full decriminalisation of sex work using the framework of worker's rights. it was fascinating to read their arguments and to learn not just about the legislation of other countries, but also my own.

4. In order to keep warm, it’s good to spend some time with the people we love: name a fictional family/household/friend-group that you’d like to be a part of.

part of me wants to say the rivers cousins from Jane Eyre, although st. john is massively creepy and also just very annoying, god bless. next option would probably be the girls from The Lunar Chronicles by Marissa Meyer, they had a fun little found family going by the end of those book.

5. The colourful leaves are piling up on the ground: show us a pile of fall-coloured spines!

i put actual effort into this so you're not allowed to judge me

6. Fall is the perfect time for some storytelling by the fireside: share a book wherein somebody is telling a story.

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern is made of stories from top to bottom -- people tell stories, are in them, try to escape them, and create new ones. rather meta, i loved it very much (although the run-on sentences were a bit much)

7. The nights are getting darker: share a dark, creepy read.

i did somehow get jumpscared by The Turn of the Screw by Henry James when i had to read it for undergrad (the very last scene with the little boy, if you're wondering), but the one that i actually found the most unsettling to read was Misery by Stephen King. it was a very visceral, creeping book, and imo far scarier than It as a reading experience

8. The days are getting colder: name a short, heartwarming read that could warm up somebody’s cold and rainy day.

a book that i was surprised to love as much as i did was Lost for Words by Stephanie Butland, about a young woman who works in a bookshop and must process the complicated emotions surrounding her troubled childhood. it was darker than i expected going in, but also made me feel that much better when i got to the end

9. Fall (luckily, it’s my favourite season) returns every year: name an old favourite that you’d like to return to soon.

i would like to reread the lunar chronicles soon -- i have two of the books in my flat with me -- and would also like to reread Axiom's End by Lindsay Ellis at some point since i'll probably ask for the sequel for christmas.

10. Fall is the perfect time for cozy reading nights: share your favourite cozy reading “accessories”!

i don't really have reading accessories -- usually just a cup of tea, or a flask if i'm reading outside!

i'll tag @stagepresenceofapotato, @wizardysseus, @laughingmistress, @jimmyandthegiraffes and anyone else who wants to do this, consider yourselves tagged!