#i'm so sick of family stuff I just want to be left alone please
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thelikesoffinn · 3 days ago
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Okay I know Stranger Things is super not popular rn, but I just had this thought - Instagram is at fault, I swear - so imagine hiring Eddie Munson as your "professional boyfriend" for the holidays because your family sucks and you want to piss them off.
And Eddie fucking delivers, 10/10. It's utter chaos everywhere. Your mum is crying, your nan is telling you how improper this is, and your dad is fuming. Your niece is sobbing because she's a brat, and Eddie told her as much, and the one cousin no one likes is laughing so hard that the soup your brother in law brought shoots up through his nose.
I don't even need a proper romance. They can shake hands and go their separate ways. It's enough that he annoys the fam. Pure catharsis, man.
It's so much fun, I love it.
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rosazoldyckk · 2 years ago
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Yandere! Silva X Daughter Reader
⚠️warning⚠️ obsessive thoughts and mentions of death
Fandom: Hunter X Hunter. Character(s): Silva Zoldyck, Zeno Zoldyck, Illumi Zoldyck, Milluki Zoldyck
A/N: I DO NOT INTEND FOR THIS CHAPTER TO HAVE ANY RELATIONS TO INCEST!! I'm aware that some things written in this chapter might be mistaken as incest, but I promise I don't intend to make it seem that way.
Of course you can interpret my writing however you want to, I have no issues with that. Just please know I don't write stuff related to incest♡︎♡︎
*.:✧*.:✧*.:✧*.:✧*.:✧ 1138 words *.:✧*.:✧*.:✧*.:✧*.:✧*.
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"Didn't I tell you to stop killing these poor butlers, father? How do you expect us to be taken care of if you take your rage out on our servents?" The young Assassin grumbled while putting her hands on her hips. Suddenly, the whole estate went silent. However, the rest of the lower butlers blinked and gulped in hope.
At the edge of the room, the young assassin can be seen. Her long H/C hair that shined under the moonlight can put any woman to shame. Her E/C eyes that they inherited from her father were sharp yet adorable. It could not be denied that with her looks and god-given talent for assassination that the girl belonged to the Zoldyck family.
With their sudden appearance, Silva lowered his guard and relaxed. It could be seen by his face that he adored the presence of his dearest daughter. With a soft tone, he asked, "Y/N, dear, what are you doing here? I thought you were out of the house."
The Lower butlers secretly beg the assassin to spare them from their death. By doing this, not only do they have a higher chance to survive, but they could also continue to contribute in caring for the Head's most adored daughter, Y/N Zoldyck.
One with no common sense would simply assume that Y/N was the glass child of the Zoldyck family, but behind closed doors they couldn't be any more wrong. Y/N was the glue that kept the family together. She was known to be cruel, sadistic, and outstanding in the art of assassination. However, there were people such as her siblings that could see the other side of her. Most of the time, Y/N was a kind and calm individual outside of work. And today just so happened to be a day where she felt generous.
Y/N thought for a bit before shaking her head, "I thought I told you our agreement about killing butlers in the mansion. Their screams can be heard from my room. It would be better if you killed them quickly or just let them free," she sighed as she turned her eyes to the poor butlers that had been severely tortured by electric shock.
Silva on the other hand glared sharply. Although it was subtle, his eyes went smaller, and clenched his hand.
He hated it.
He hated it when HIS daughter ignored him for Illumi.
He despised it when HIS daughter left him alone to play with Kalluto.
He loathed it when HIS daughter was playing video games with Milluki.
He felt sick to his stomach whenever he witnessed HIS daughter braiding Alluka's hair.
He detested it when HIS daughter is 'playing' outside with Killua and his pathetic excuses of friends.
And oh dear god did he want to smash a boulder across his head whenever he saw HIS daughter laughing with her mother and grandfather.
Silva loved his only daughter to death. Every inch of his daughter belonged to him and ONLY him alone. He hated sharing with others, family only being a small exception. If he could, he would lock her in his room and make her look at him and ONLY him alone.
Knowing that the entire family would riot against him if he were to bring harm to the assassin, he buried that plan deep within his heart and continued to be a 'good dad' for her. He forgot the agreement and decided to play it funny so that his daughter could let this case pass.
"I apologize, dear," Silva grumbled with a fake frown. "Unfortunately, these foolish butlers failed their mission and their penalty is nothing but death. I thought it would be great to punish them first but I overlooked an important part,"
Y/N kept her mouth shut and looked at her father. Somehow, Her emotions had stirred up from her father's response. She knew that her father loved her the most out of her brothers. He would remember every word she had said and did not dare to break any promises. Sadly, although she had been feeling generous, today has been a tiring day for her and all she wanted is a good night's rest.
"Just let them free for my sake. I couldn't hear them screaming any longer! Do you know how much their screams had disturbed me from my sleep?! This is a simple agreement and somehow you can't even remember my words. I'm so disappointed in you," Y/N spat in tiredness. As soon as she said that, she quickly turned her back and jumped to her room which is located on the outer side of the fortress.
Silva hid his rage and waved to her daughter's back. "I hope you'll have a nice dream, my sweet Y/N"
Soon after Y/N left the room, the temperature dropped. The butlers shivered as the waited for another wave of electricity to shoot through their bodies, but nothing came. They glanced up at their boss, only to see him with an expressionless face.
Without another word, he allowed the ball of electricity growing on his hand to explode, killing the butlers in an instant. With his eyes full of tenderness, he took a deep breath of air.
"I'll make it up to you, my daughter..."
⁂✧⁂
Zeno sighed tirelessly as he observed his sons actions. "When will he stop with this obsessive behaviour? Those butlers did nothing except make sure Y/N was taken care of, and yet he still killed them? In all my years I've never seen Silva express such madness before."
Illumi sighed in helplessness to his grandfathers words, "Even I'm starting to get a bit bored now, As her beloved eldest brother I must make sure that she is on the path to success. Father doesn't need to get involved when she has me by her side at all times."
"You're right," Milluki replied in annoyance, "Though Y/N is next in line to head the family, seems like dad is a little too eager for her to stay by his side, am I right?" He grumbled as he shoved a handful of chips into his mouth.
The 3 of them shared looks of confusion as Silva finally got up to exit his room.
All they could do is wait.
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under-loch-n-key · 2 months ago
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Hi everyone. Obviously everyone has seen the news and read the polls and obviously you can tell that we’re likely cooked.
For some reason our country wants to elect the Mango Menace and his gaggle of orange stained goons once again.
I am terrified for myself, my loved ones, my country, our climate, and just everything.
However, I’d like to tell the LGBTQIA+ community these things because I know we are terrified right now.
What happened today, it’s devastating. It angers me too. Some of my closest family voted for that horrible man. I don’t think I can look at them the same way anymore. Especially, when they hold no guilt or remorse about it even after I explained his policies to them. What do I know, I guess.. 🤷🏻‍♂️🙄
However, as a queer, trans man in this little community, I want ALL of the LGBTQIA+ people who will see this post to know that things will be alright. We all have each other. We know we exist here in the states even if none of us have met. We EXIST.
Just because those orange stained dunderheads want to silence us doesn't change the fact that we exist. We do. We always will. Bigotry cannot fight facts and science. We'll always exist. The only time trans people won't exist is when the human race dies out. Even then, we have other animal species that are queer and trans. No matter what, we will always exist in nature. They cannot change that. They cannot take that from us. Do not lose hope. Even though it's really fucking hard not to.
Do not lose it. The fact that you and I exist is a beacon of hope to another trans and queer person. We exist. None of us want to be left here alone. So we must go on. We must continue to exist. Things WILL be okay. I'll always keep fighting and living for you and every one of my trans and queer brothers, sisters, and siblings.
You existing and simply being here is a beacon of hope to me. Someone who has understands how I'm feeling. Someone who is LIKE me but so different at the same time.
In the grand scheme of the universe, we are very small. However, even though it's small, the fact is that it EXISTS. It's so fucking small in this big void of the cosmos but we're here. We're made of similar components as stars, ones that had to die for us to exist.
I like to think of the sky as when humanity was truly equal. When we were just atoms in the big ol' void, ya know? We didn't fight. We didn't give a shit about all of this stuff. We were allll different types of stars and matter. We were all random as hell, but we just WERE. We coexisted peacefully together in the universe.
Now that those stars are dead as a door nail and some dumb fishy bastard decided to get curious and walk on land, we're all human. Humanity fucking sucks ass sometimes but it's also such a beautiful fucking thing. No matter what happens, a part of us will always exist.
Our existence is embedded in the universe. Nothing can change that. So, please keep living. Be safe, but keep living. Always keep fighting. We belong here just like anyone else.
You belong. You are loved. You are cherished. You are noticed by me and other people here. We all understand each other. So keep going. Again, one day we will all have a better tomorrow. I swear to fucking god or whatever the hell is out there, if anything, however it's unlikely, I will ALWAYS keep fighting for you and WITH you.
Every protest l attend. Every petition I sign. Every time I vote. Every time I go to pride. Every time l simply leave my home as I am. I am doing it for you and all of us. Our people WILL have our damn tomorrow. I'm sick of us not having it. I swear to you we will. So, again, please keep going. Keep fighting. Keep living. Exist. Your existence may be a threat to some bigoted fucker but your existence is precious to someone else. Please do not let them take your right to exist away from you. Keep going.
We’ll have a better tomorrow, the one that we deserve eventually, but we just need get through the hard, bumpy, dirty road first.
Again, we will be okay. Everything will be okay. We’ll get through it. Yes, unfortunately, we will likely see suicide rates and hate crime rates go up and that's disgusting and just all types of awful and depressing. It angers me beyond words.
However, we are strong.
We shouldn't have to be strong though.
What we should be and need to be is loved, accepted, warm, fed, have shelter, and are safe.
For now though, we remain strong. You will always have a place here.
You will live. You will not die, hun. I know the thought creeps in and believe me, I understand. Those thoughts creep in for me too, but we must learn to try to control them. If there's anything I know about us trans and queer folk it's that we're strong, feisty, kind, very sexy, and cheeky as hell. So, if we live, we live because it's our damn right and to be spiteful. We do not owe the people who want to harm us our lives. We just don't. We deserve healthcare. We deserve to love and get married.
We deserve to grow old.
You will grow old. You will be able to go on those trips you've always wanted. You will be able to have that cheesy romance you've always wanted, if you are someone who is wanting a relationship.
You'll be able to sit down and watch your favourite movie. Why? Because you stayed. You didn't give up. Ever. We will always exist.
We will ALWAYS live.
Being transgender has existed before humans even walked this earth and it will still exist when all of us book our holy bus tickets and the blessed holy tax collector comes to collect our debted souls. No matter what, we will live on. They can silence us all they want and erase whatever the fuck they want but that doesn't mean that it's the truth. We're HERE.
We've been here since forever ago. Those Cheeto dusted dunderheads cannot change that. Like I told another person here, other animals and even plants are trans and queer! We've always been here. That won't change, hun.
Everything WILL be okay. We'll always survive and live on. Look at how far we've come in these past years. Many of us thought that we'd be gone already but here we are, two trans people typing away in comment sections on an app where middle age men get off to octopus porn and neko ladies in Japanese school girl outfits because men. and welcome to the internet, I guess. Lmao.
Everything will work out on way or another. We'll have our tomorrow, hun. For now, we gotta buckle down because we're in for a bumpy ride but hey, thankfully on bumpy you have those moments where ya hit the bump just right and you're like
"WOAH, HELLO!- mister bump, you better watch yourself, you saucy boy~ You can't be doin' that. You better take me to dinner first." Lmao. Okay, on a more serious note, we just gotta buckle down together and get through this bumpy ass dirt road because after awhile you make it through that rocky dirt road in the woods and come out to feel smooth pavement again. It'll be alright. We just need to band together and make it through. We all are always stronger together. You're not alone, my friends.
You're talkin' to a guy who has the personality of a gay muppet with a big mouth. I'm shocked nothin’ has happened to me yet with my yappy ass screeching and getting over 80+ gay people to start baa-ing like sheep at a bigot at last year's pride event, but that's a wholeeeee different situation.
My point is, we'll be okay. We'll make it through.
You'll survive. You have me. You have everyoneeeee here and on other social forums. Sure, it's not the same as in-person interactions but it's somethin'. It’s better than nothing I guess. If we’ve gotta go stealth mode eventually and make secret groups for us trans and queer folk, then so be it.
Just do whatever you feel you need to do to keep yourselves safe.
We'll have a better tomorrow. We just need to keep pushing through this rough shit. We'll get out of the woods and onto smooth pavement with open skies eventually.
Continue to exist. Fight. Be safe, but live. Live for yourself, fellow trans people, and simply for spite.
Fuck bigots. Not actually though. Like DON'T fuck them. Who knows where they've been. But fuck them. They're not worth your life. Their bigotry is not worth your life. Live because it's your right.
Those guys are all so far up Donald Trump’s ass he fired his doctor and hired his supporters to give him a colonoscopy.
So, live long. Live for love and live for spite, my friends. We'll get through this.
It’s Trump 2: Electric Boogaloo. SPOILER: The first movie sucked too. They even tried to make a third one — Mango Menace Strikes Back! We didn’t want to come to the theatre to see the second one but it was a class field trip that most of America signed for us. So, we’ve allll got no choice but to go on the trip to the cinema.
Anyways, things will be okay. We’ll make it through. We’ll out get it figured out. We always do. We’ll take care of each other. Everything will be alright. 🤙🏼💛⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️✨
(Sorry for typos and repetitive speech- it’s 4:14 a.m. EST. 😭😭)
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my-debauchery · 2 months ago
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Wonder.
idol!haechan × gn!reader
g`fluff
cw`tears(happy), kisses, hugs
A/N: constructive criticism is more than welcomed. if you see mistakes in cw, please, let me know.
'do you ever wonder?' haechan asks as he lays his head on your shoulder and pulls you in closer to him. 'wonder about what?'you ask.
you look up at the clock on the bed side table, 03:36. you are laying in bed with haechan, slightly overheating, cause he decided to turn into coala and trap you completely, as well as cocoon both of you in a blanket. he claims you need to warm up after the earlier walk you took and he needs to recharge from you, after a shity day he had. sure you do,both of you. but now you're wondering how are you not melting.
you start to slip in to your slumber when haechan tightens his hug even more. 'things?' he mumbles in to your shoulder. you're slipping again trying to remember what you were talking about. 'so do you?' he whines a bit and you chuckle at his impatience 'i don't know what you talking about' you're quite sleepy, so his question left your mind as quickly as it entered it.
'want to know what I wonder about all the time? to the point that when I talked to doyoung hyung about it and how much it occupies my mind, he genuinely looked concerned, said i might be losing it' haechan says with a smile. you're intrigued, so you whisper 'please, share with a crowd'
'i wonder about you. and me. how we met, how we love each and what our life's will look like in 10,20,30 or 60 years from now. would we have been able to meet if one thing were to be different in our life's? will we be happy? how will our children look like? how am I going to say no when you'll decide to get an ugly little white dog? i don't think we will able to find another daegal, right? what if you get sick and leave me all alone? what if i? how can i? what to do when i let our child eat too many sweets and now they have a stomachache? and you told me not to do that. should we get a place at the cemetery now or later? won't the prices rise? will i cry at our wedding or not? will you? will you let me be buried at your feet like that italian painter? do you ever find me annoying or too much?do y-' you immediately interject 'no, never' he kisses your cheek and moves his lips to your ear and continues in whisper 'do you actually like my friends? as much as i do? my family? does yours like me? are you lying that they do? are you sick and tired of me asking you to cook for me my favorite things again and again? do you yearn for me when I'm gone? as much as i do for you? do you like the smell of my new shampoo? will you marry me? when would be the right time to ask? is there a right time?'
you lay there, frozen as tears are gathering in your eyes, unable to say anything really. nothing that, in your opinion, will be as moving and silly as haechan's waterfall of thoughts. but when you come to realize what his last 3 questions were 'did you just ask me to marry you?' you sit up and look at him. he sits up and looks down to grab your hands, he is blushing. 'i mean...' he can't look you in the eyes, so you ask again 'did you? i mean it's not very romantic, but kind is, you know? i'm not mad.' he looks up at you, eyes twinkling 'really? it's not how i wanted to ask, but i just couldn't stop. you are truly what occupies 99,99% of my mind, the rest is unimportant stuff. so, will you? will you marry me? i know that we can't legally now, but in the future i'll give the grandest wedding you want. for now we can wear matching rings and think of each other as husband and wife. and we can have a celebration with family and friends. how does that sound?'
you look up to stop yourself from crying and when look at him. truly look at him and all that you can see is love. love so overwhelming sometimes you feel you will explode from the happiness that it brings. and yet so calming and stabilizing, it makes you power through the darkest of hours.
'i will. i love so much, i don't need any wedding. as long as we are each other's, we can be happy on our own, there is no need for the world to know.' haechan smiles and pulls you in for a kiss, short and sweet. and then another on the cheek, and the forehead, and left temple , and right temple, till he kissed your face all over and you're both giggling messes. you pull him in for a hug and squeeze as hard as you can, wondering. how are you so lucky to be able to touch the sun and not burn up?
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ralibo14 · 5 months ago
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TPN Brainrots part 1:
Another TPN manga panel redraw, but this time everyone goes down with me (because it's sad).
Also part one of my 'wonderful' tpn theories and head canons. It'll be long😅. There will be manga spoilers so please, read at your own risk😊.
First character I go through is... Ray.
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He is one of the most complicated characters I ever saw (all tpn characters are, tbh). I always thought that people who have photographic memory are so lucky. Ray showed me that it's both a blessing and the curse.
Like in the picture above. You can clearly see that the first 2 kid waving at his direction. It's strange to know that there was a time when the Trio were one of the young kids and not the older ones. My first head canon is that Ray tried to save more kids, not just Emma and Norman when he was younger. When the blond haired boy leaves (first panel) he looks like he is about to cry (also the Trio is around 4 or 6) but when the other kids get 'adopted' Ray keeps his head low most of the frames (I'm convinced that when the second kid left he was already working as Isabella's spy.)
Ray coloration explained:
Purple eyes are self explanatory to me. I started draw him with purple eyes as soon as I found out he is Isabella's son. Purple in the hair and freckles? Well... I'm still very, very convinced that Leslie didn't die (at least not when he left the House). I always think about his situation, like what Norman got into with Lambda. The Ratri-clan is big but they need outsiders, to be soldiers, scientists, etc. And since girls from the Houses can only become Sisters and Moms... maybe some boys can become scientists and soldiers. (I can't believe I'm writing this but think about Andrew🤢... he was 100% not Ratri yet he could become an adult). So by this logic I believe Leslie could grow up too and (because I'm a sucker for happiness) he met Isabella again at some point.
Ray turning away:
On the second frame he is not looking at the girl who is leaving, but to the opposite direction. Why? Notice something else? Yes, Norman is missing too. Gilda has her winter jumper on so I figure Norman got sick again. Ray priorities his friends safety over everything else.
Also notice how Emma and Norman slowly get into the middle of the frame while Mom/Isabella get out of it? Pretty strong metaphor. It's the perfect example of 'Blood related family ��� real family'. And while I'm a RayEmma shipper (obviously aged up version) I would never forget about Norman. He is as important to Ray as Emma. This Trio sticks together no matter what.
(older manga colouring ⬇️)
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Now onto the hearth breaking stuff:
Ray's relationship with Isabella:
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This deleted scene with Ray and Ayshe lives rent free in my head. Like there are two people with similar family situations and the one who lived int the middle of nowhere with a demon parent thinks positively about their parent, while the other, who grew up in a comfortable home like space with a human parent, thinks the opposite.
"But to me, she was always a monster"– Ray.
Like ufff... This sentence hits real hard. And it's low-key true from Ray perspective. He studied and read all the books in the House, not because he was interested, but because he had to. Norman is a genius, Emma learns real fast, Ray does everything he can to always get max points on his tests. But he also secretly planning his friends excape. Collects scraps of technology to build the device which makes them able to excape, plans his own 💀 carefully, so no one else will get hurt and on a top of that he is 'spying' for Isabella. Sacrifices people he wanted to protect. I can't imagine that inside panic when he didn't get max scores to that one test. I'm sure he was happy because Norman and Emma got their regular scores, but deep down he felt like he failed.
My head canon here is that Ray always gets nightmares if he is alone or in an unsafe place. And 'thanks' to his perfect memory his nightmares build up from actual memories (like we see that in the Seven Wall Arc). Also he doesn't get sick often but when he does... it's like a memory fuelled fever dream, with hallucinations and etc.
Ray's healing journey starts after the Jailbreak Arc. As soon as Mom is not around anymore, he ever so slowly starts to let down his guard and starts to show more and more emotions. His relationship with Yuugo/Mister is like a greatest archivment in his case. The playful, sarcastic 'arguments' and the way he openly said his opinion on things in front of Yuugo and Lucas. Shows how much he changed and opened up.
Isabella on the other hand... her change of heart and feelings were a mistery almost to the very end. To be honest I hated her most of the time, until the Back to Grace Field Arc. (Older manga colouring again⬇️😅)
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Two things in this page which are very important.
1: Ray's guard is up again in no time, when he sees Isabella, while her emotionless mask is cracking. This is the first time we get a little inside of how she really feels about Ray.
2: Flashback of the two most important things that connects them. The song and the way they were forced to sacrifice others to stay alive.
The lullaby is very important, because it's calming and feels very intimate (like a normal parent-child relationship should be).
You also can't convince me otherwise that Ray didn't hummed this lullaby at least once in the B06-32 shelter to help the youngest kids fall asleep.
And now... onto the last picture. Their goodbye.
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Saddest part ever! Never forgiving for this decision.
Ray and Isabella were never allowed to talk even two short sentences with each other without any consequences. In the House they had to play their assigned roles. Then they didn't see each other for almost 2 years. Finally they had to save half of the team from getting unalived... And they moment they would have time the last twist happens... leaving us with a sad ending.
Epilogue and Human World Arc...does little to compensate. Although I can't get over the fact that Yuugo's, Conny's and Isabella's 'ghosts' helped Ray found Emma in the Human World.
Speaking of finding Emma. My last head canon for Ray is the following;
When they found out that Emma lost all of her memories from the Demon World. Ray couldn't help himself but whisper a "I wish this happened to me". And everyone looks at him with an understanding smile thinking he blames himself for this... But in reality he really just selfishly thought (only for seconds) that he could forget everything happened on the other side.
Okay. That's all. Sorry for the supper long post and I'm forever thankful if you read through my brainrots 🥰😘. Also let me know if I should cover more characters like this. I'll obviously do Emma and Norman but if there any other characters you want to see please let me know🥰🤩💖.
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neteyamslovrr · 2 years ago
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DO YOU LOVE HER - pt 2
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summary: after finding out your first love lo'ak had cheated on you with tsireya, you are left to find yourself again. luckily the chief's son is ready to be there along with you
content: 1.2k words, fem!omatikaya reader, angst, negative self talk, depression, hurt comfort
authors note: i'm so sorry i've been so dead here on tumblr!! lifes been getting me buttt her is the awaited pt2. i have a headcanon that na'vi's love hard, so they also get heartbroken hard. so i incorporated that. hope you enjoy babies!!
pt 1
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It was like the world went grey after that night. Walking away from Lo’ak with tears falling down your face as sobs so loud even the waves couldn’t silence them echoed out into the night.
How were you meant to live here. Alone, no family, no lover. You couldn’t go back to the marui you shared with the Sully’s. You couldn’t go back to the forest. You were alone.
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This feeling didn’t go away. It had been weeks and you were still barely being seen in the open. You moved your stuff into a small marui on the edge of the village, the Sully’s especially Tuk asked why you were moving but you didn’t have the energy to explain it to them. You decided it was Lo’ak’s responsibility.
But the days and nights merged into one. The soft breeze of the wind, you never felt as you stayed hidden away. Your hair was starting to get messy, your eyes having large eyebags below them, your figure frail and weak as you had not attended any communal dinners in weeks.
Concern grew for you immensely in the Sully home, as Lo’ak felt himself be eaten up with guilt. It crawled in and gnawed at his heart every time he looked at the closed curtains of your secluded home.
“Lo’ak…you must talk with her.” Neytiri says, brushing her hands through her son’s hair. She missed your presence dearly. You were another daughter of hers.
“and say what? She does not want apologies.” Lo’ak complained twitching away from Neytiri’s loving touches.
“She has not been out of the house in a very long time…Lo’ak you have to own up to your choices and fix this.” Lo’ak shook his head fiercely.
“I can’t fix this…I can’t fix this at all.”
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However, there was someone who was making their way to your marui. Ready to fix this, ready to see you thrive. Sick and tired of your decline.
You heard the shuffle of your closed curtains and groaned at the sudden brightness. “go away.”
“Get up.” You shot up in an instant at the familiar voice.
“Ao’nung?...What are you doing here?” Ao’nung assessed your features. Your sickliness made him feel queasy, you were so pale, so thin. His heart broke just seeing you like this.
“I am the chief’s son, I have a duty to make sure everyone in my clan is doing alright….and I’m worried about you.” The last part of his sentence was said with tenderness, his usually cocky face showing an uttermost care and sincerity.
“…well I’m fine. You can go.” Your voice was as harsh as it could be, it was raspy, raw from all the hysterical cries you had let out.
“We both know you’re not…” Ao’nung stepped closer to you, his rough fingers reaching out to touch your cold shoulder. Both literally and figuratively.
“I don’t want you pity.”
“I don’t pity you…I’m worried about you.” Ao’nung said, crouching down so he could be eye-level with you as you laid in your bed.
“I know you pity me. The brother of the woman my first love cheated on me with. You are probably being tasked to do this. Please just go…I don’t need help.”
“I’m not leaving you.”
“I’ve had that said to me before.”
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Lo’ak was making his way towards your secluded marui. His palms were sweaty, shaking as he walked. His heart-beated louder in his chest the closer he got to your home. His mind swirled with what to say to you. How he could ever reconcile the bond between you. How you could ever forgive him.
As he reached the entrance of your marui he felt paralysed with fright. He stood at the slighty shut curtain, as he peeked inside.
You were sobbing, lips quivering as your chest heaved up and down. He saw your broken figure the way you were shaking, your incoherent mumbles followed by the aggressive hiccups of your loud cries.
“I just don’t understand why I wasn’t good enough…” You cried out loud, he thought you were crying to yourself, breaking yourself down with your thoughts. But he was wrong.
A soft shush came from inside the tent. As Lo’ak peered closer he noticed a familiar figure, soothing your worked up cries as he patted the back of your head, letting you cry into his chest. Ao’nung
He didn’t know why he felt so sick seeing you cry in another man’s arms. He had no right to feel possessive over you when he had done you so wrong. But maybe it was the fact that he couldn’t fix this. That he had completely lost you, but not only as a lover, but as a friend. Someone who followed him to the ends of the earth.
“You are good enough…don’t talk about yourself like that.” Ao’nung hugged you tightly. It was the first touch, the first sense of comfort you had felt in weeks. Maybe that’s why your walls broke down so first. Crumbling into his outstretched hands. “He was just selfish…it was not you, not you at all.” He comforted, letting your cries deafen him as you continued to shake and shiver in his arms.
Lo’ak felt as if he was going to puke. The reality of his selfishness occurring right in front of him. He had to go. He couldn’t do this. He was too selfish to face his own choices, too scared to realise the truth of what he had done to you.
Ripped you away from the forest, your family, your clan. Only to desert you the moment he found his heart buzzing. He was immature and he would live his life loving in guilt, knowing that he sacrificed your happiness for his own.
So he walked away. His head hung low in shame. As the calls of the happy villagers around him seemed to taunt him. How could anyone rejoice in a time like this? But he did what led him to this problem in the first place. He headed straight to Tsireya for comfort.
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Your crying subsided eventually, throat feeling raw as Ao’nung quietly hushed you as he rocked you in his arms.
If you weren’t in a completely vulnerable state you would have already crawled out of his arms and washed off his stench. But right now as you both sat in your bed, as he cradled you in his arms, rocking you back and forth. You felt cared for, for the first time in a long time.
His arms were strong, as he moved the hair out of your face softly, letting you grow sleepy in his embrace.
“you know it’s not your fault. Right?” You frowned, lips tucked into each other as you looked into his deep stare,.
“one day I will…” ao’nung nodded and rocked you both back and forward until your sad whimpers turned into soft snores as he watched you sleep peacefully.
Ao’nung was sure he would beat Lo’ak harder than he had ever been beaten before. No mercy would be given. But right now he focused on the broken girl in his arms, that he was determined to make sure was whole again.
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tags: @8resa @ilovejakesullysdick @neteyamsblog @live-laugh-neteyam @reyalvr @trashfox @darkacademictrash @scntfrhs @dreamyescapesfromreality @fanboyluvr @neteyamzmate @neteyamyawne @neteyamssbaby @lixiesbrowniess
thankyou sm for reading!! reblogs + replies so totally appreciated thankyou lovelies <333
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thequeenofthedisneyverse · 3 months ago
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Villain Kenji au - Chapter 1
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Mentions of character death
This wasn't happening...it couldn't have been happening...
Kenji Sato...freshly turned 22 years old only two weeks ago. His baseball career was just starting and actually looking good for him. Yeah, it's going to be a long road ahead towards fame but nothing he can't handle.
But this...he can't handle this...
He was just on the phone with his mother who was in the Tokyo airport. She was there and wanted to let Kenji know she made it there safely.
It was a little funny when she accidentally clicked the video call button instead of the regular call button...
"Oh, my apologies ken, you know I'm not good at this technology stuff. But hey, at least you can see me!"
He saw her...he saw her die...
It- It happened so fast it- She didn't even have time to properly react. That...that thing...that scaled demon raised itself from out of the water and trudged itself toward the water.
It was unprovoked...yet it used violence in its wake on innocent bystanders. What could have possibly set it off? Kenji didn't know...all he heard was a roar on the other side of the phone and saw his mother look up in fear.
The last thing he saw was her frightened face before the phone fell to the ground.
He screamed her name at the phone, hoping, wishing for any sign of life...but nothing. The screen was black, so her phone was more than likely broken.
Kenji fell to his knees and dropped his phone...a lump was in his throat. He can't breathe and his heart was stop going at a million miles an hour
This...this is a joke; it has to be a joke...a sick joke...but his mother would never play a prank like this...
Kenji's voice was hoarse as he felt numb...was it the shock? He wanted to cry but something was stopping him
"Mama...please...be alive"
30 thousand people died that day...including Emiko Sato.
The funeral was heart breaking...He was quiet and numb for quite some time...only crying when he was in the safety of his room. And it wasn't many people there at the funeral.
Emiko cut off most of her family due to the toxicity she grew up with so the only people who showed up were her childhood best friends. They all gave him their condolences, but their words fell on numb ears.
One parent absent and the other six feet under...doesn't really do well on a guy's mental health. He constantly wishes he was there to save her. He constantly has nightmares about that day, some where he's holding her corpse...begging her to wake up.
Kenji didn't send out a funeral invite to his father because he was too infuriated at the mere thought of doing so.
"He should've been there...he has the suit for fuck's sake, and he couldn't save her?!...no...no, he can burn in hell for all I care!"
Hayao tried to call him, voicemail after voicemail, text after text. Kenji blocked him entirely. The final straw was the last email...
"Kenji...Kenji please, your mother isn't answering my calls and...I- I need your help. M- My body...I- it's giving out on me; I don't think I can fight much longer. I sent you a copy of the Ultraman suit...please Kenji...I need you to help"
The audacity...the sheer audacity of this fucker was immaculate. Ignore the existence of your son and wife since he was six years old and now you want his help? IS HE FUCKING SERIOUS?!
No...no, no, no...FUCK NO!
Kenji searched for his father's number and dialed it, waiting for an answer...he picked up. Ken laid down everything he felt for the past 17 years onto his father.
"You left me and mom to fend for ourselves, you left mom alone to raise me by HERSELF! You've only ever called ONCE on my birthday and never even called on mom's. You don't care...YOU'VE FUCKING NEVER CARED! And... when mom needed you the most...you let her die..."
"W- What" Hayao didn't understand...what did he mean by that?!
"Oh...I forgot to tell you...mom is dead...your WIFE is dead..."
Those words hurt kenji badly...his heart clenched at the memory. The memory plagued his thoughts and dreams since the incident.
Before Hayao could even reply Kenji threw his phone at the wall and fell to his knees. Angry and sad tears fell down his cheeks as he sobbed.
His fists punched at the ground ferociously. His ai assistant, Mina, used her robotic arms to hold him back so he wouldn't hurt himself further.
"Kenji, this isn't a good coping mechanism, you need to calm down!"
"FUCK. OFF!"
The young man screamed and thrashed about to get out of the robot's grasp. She didn't let him go and held onto him tightly until he calmed down.
After about 20 more minutes of his fury, he calmed down a bit and Mina took him too his room. She laid him down on his bed and he just...laid there. Too exhausted and emotionally drained to fight back..
"Get some rest Kenji...you need it"
The following days were like a haze for him. He was technically in and out of reality at this point. A week went by, and something came in the mail.
...The ultraman suit...the symbol that was the bane of his existence.
Fortunately, or unfortunately, Kenji was actually in tune with reality enough to open the box and pull it out. Just seeing it caused a violent reaction as he tried to rip it, burn it, doing anything he could to destroy it but...nothing worked.
It was like Edna Mode made it or something!
Kenji was out of breath as the thing was in his hands. His fingers gripping it tightly.
Ken didn't want to be Ultraman, just to spite his father. Not only that, but Kenji would swallow glass before he would attempt to fight a Kaiju or Kindly move it away from where it was causing terror.
To be honest...he just wanted to rip those things apart, limb from limb, organ from organ. To slice, cut, and tear every fiber of them to shreds with his bare hands.
Kenji was going to throw the suit into the ocean, but a thought crossed his mind. The KDF. They were known to have more permanent ways of getting rid of Kaiju's...
And from what he could remember, His father hated the KDF ever sense they became a thing.
Then it clicked...and a bone chilling smile came upon Kenji's face...
"I'll be Ultraman for you dad...just. for. you"
This is the story of Kenji Sato...a man who's going to fall far from grace...and into the pits of insanity.
@jaidenk-nox FINALLLYYY MADE IIIIT! (Ik it's short, I sorry for that tho)
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jakeyzzz · 2 years ago
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I'll be here
requested by an anon !♡
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(fluff/angst) - { hurt - comfort } heeseung x f!reader oneshot
masterlist ♡
⚠️♡ warnings - ( reader's parents fighting, screaming, arguments, sadness, depression, swearing, running away, sneaking out, crying, mentions of feeling alone, comfort, cuddling, hugging, kissing, heeseung being the most amazing human being ever - ) ♡⚠️
!! please let me know if I missed anything 🌻
!!! english is NOT my first language so please be nice
♡ 1,4k words
...
Emptiness. That's the only Word that could ever describe the Way you felt when you opened your Eyes in the Morning after hearing your Parents constantly screaming at each other in the Kitchen for the whole Night. You felt weak, scared and maybe even a little angry. You didn't know what the Fight was about. But to be honest ... you didn't even really wanted to know. You've already had enough to worry about, since you've been kind of depressed. But your Parents never listened to you. They just always acted like they didn't care when you told them about your Problems and Fears. They made you feel alone, and sometimes even unwanted. And that made you wish your Parents were more loving, and especially caring .
When you heard them arguing again right after you woke up, you just wanted to scream into your Pillow. You could've sworn that you heard Glass shattering on the Floor from the Kitchen, which made you flinch slightly. You were sick and tired of their shit, and you just wanted to leave. You just started sobbing into your Pillow, trying to think of a Way to get out of here. You just couldn't do this anymore. But where the hell were you supposed to go ? You didn't have many Friends, and the rest of your Family lived far away from where you lived. You were basically alone.
But then, one specific Person popped into your Head.   Lee Heeseung.  He has helped you a lot of Times before. He picked you up after your Parents left you in the middle of a random Street at night after a big Argument, and let you stay at his house for over a Week. He also got into a pretty big Fight with your Parents for you before, and basically saved your ass with that. That Boy was basically your personal guardian Angel. He protected you. And whenever you were with him, you felt safe. He gave you, what your Parents were never able to give you. Comfort and Safety.
So you didn't even think twice, before finally dialing his Number. And only after a few Seconds, he picked up. ,, Y/N? Are you alright ?'' Hearing his soothing Voice made you smile softly, even though you were still crying. He heard you sniffling through the Phone. You shook your Head, even though he couldn't even see it. ,, Actually, i'm not alright. I really need to get out of here, Heeseung. I was wondering, If i could come to your house and stay over for a few Days . I don't wanna bother you though'' You mumbled through your Tears. ,,No, please come over. You know you're always welcome. I'll be right here waiting for you.'' Heeseung answered with no hesitation. He sounded worried. ,,Thank you, Heeseung. I promise I'll make it up to you some Day'' You said, wiping your Nose before hanging up to pack your Stuff. You grabbed your Backpack from the Corner of your Room and stuffed everything you'll need for the next few Days inside of it.
You packed some Clothes, your Toothbrush, your Phone, your Makeup and some other Stuff you thought you might need. And when you were done with that, you threw on a Hoodie and made your Way out of your Room. You quickly ran down the Stairs, before taking a last glance at your Parents in the Kitchen. They were still fighting. And they didn't even notice you standing there, which made your Heart clench and your Eyes fill with Tears once again. So you quickly turned around, and eventually left your House.
You hugged yourself the entire time on the Way to Heeseung's House, trying to get some warmth. And you cried. You cried so much. You didn't want anyone to see you cry though, which made you walk faster as you tried to hide your Face as good as possible. You felt pathetic. But you knew it was okay to cry ... Heeseung taught you that a while ago. And only a few Minutes later, you finally arrived at his House.
You softly knocked on his Front Door, before waiting for him to open the Door. And after a few Seconds, he finally did. He looked at your Tear stained Face in worry, before quickly pulling you into a tight hug. He softly caressed your Back, as he let you sob into his Chest. ,,It's okay Angel, you're safe in my Arms. '' Heeseung carefully kissed your Head, before pulling you inside of his House. He realized your Hands were Ice cold, as he took you to his Room. He took your Backpack, before making you sit down on his Bed.
He eventually ended up giving you a Blanket, so you could stop freezing. And right after that, he sat down next to you. You looked so exhausted and it was so hard to look at. ,,I think it was my fault they got into that Argument. You know, there's that Voice inside my Head that keeps telling me I'm the Problem'' You said, biting your Lip to stop yourself from crying. Heeseung furrowed his Eyebrows as he shook his Head. ,, Don't listen to that Voice, Y/N. Listen to my Voice. I'm so sorry I can't take the Pain away from you but I need you to know, that you were never the Problem. And i'm here for you. I'm never gonna leave.'' Heeseung said,making you look at him as another Tear ran down your Cheek. You forced a soft smile on your Face. ,,How long can I stay here?'' Heeseung softly smiled. ,,You can stay for as long as you need.'' He said.
You loved Heeseung so much. He was exactly what you needed in the Moment, and he chose the perfect Words to make you feel better. And what he did next, made your Heart flutter. He hesitantly lowered his Head, before softly kissing the Tears away from your Cheeks. You closed your Eyes at his gentle Touch. You've never felt so loved by anyone. And even though Heeseung never told you he loved you, you could feel it. ,,I'm glad you're here.'' He whispered between his feathery kisses. ,,No one's ever done this to me before'' You stated, making Heeseung look at you with a soft Smile on his Lips. You looked at Heeseung, as he put a thick strand of Hair behind your Ear. ,,Can I try something?'' Heeseung softly nodded his Head at your Question.
You nervously cupped his Cheek with your Hand, looking into his Eyes before taking a quick glance at his Lips, making Heeseung giggle quietly. And then you finally leaned in, pulling Heeseung into a soft Kiss. The Kiss started off soft and gentle, but eventually got more passionate and heated, making Heeseung break the Kiss quickly. ,,Can you promise me not to do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable ? If it gets too much, please pull away'' You nodded your Head,resting your Forehead against his before Heeseung pulled you into another deep Kiss.
He touched you so beautifully, you could feel how much love he had for you. ,,I've been wanting to kiss you for a while'' You murmured against his Lips,making him smile against yours. You pulled away before giving him one last peck on his beautiful, plump Lips. Heeseung pulled you onto his Lap, before wrapping his Arms around your Waist as you wrapped yours around his Neck. ,,So...you've never kissed anyone before?'' You shook your Head at his Question. ,,Nope , never.'' Heeseung hid his Face in the Crook of your Neck. ,,Well, can I get another Kiss?'' Heeseung mumbled into your Neck,making you chuckle. ,,You're lucky I love kissing you'' You said, making Heeseung look at you again to press a soft Kiss on your Lips. ,,I love you Y/N, and I'll do anything to protect you. I'd even risk my life for you'' You looked at him in adoration, stroking his Cheek softly. ,,You're a Gift sent from Heaven, Hee. I love you too''
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tia-amorosa · 11 months ago
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Sunset Died - Bachelor/Clavell/Wan (?)
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One day, early in the evening. We're with the Bachelors, well, what's left of the family. To everyone's regret, the family is no longer complete. The parents of the two children died in the disaster. Now Xander is looking after them. He has also lost his parents and so they have joined forces in order to survive.
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"uh, oh man, I'm so hungry"/ "Uncle Xander will hopefully be back soon"/ "yes, hopefully ".
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While waiting for dinner at home, Michael and Xander are on the lookout for all kinds of edible things to bring home. "Man, sometimes I get the feeling that the others have already snapped up all the stuff"/ "by no means everything, check the garbage can to see if you can find anything useful there"…. Of course it's an unpleasant thing to rummage around in a garbage can for useful things, but what don't you do to improve your standard of living a bit?
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A few minutes later. "Why didn't you tell me straight away that something edible was growing behind the house?"/ "I'm sorry. Look, The lettuce has grown so beautifully. I believe that the spirit of Mama lives in every single plant. She gives us food and looks after us"/ "Yes, that's how it will be… And again, it's just a salad today… Oh, what I would give for a delicious sausage"
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A little later. "Did you get anything?"/ "Heads of lettuce, lots of them". Pauline wrinkled her nose and threw her head back in annoyance. "oh man, I'm getting sick of all this green stuff"/ "well, maybe something can be done, I saw the boss bringing a few boxes to the back of the warehouse today, it looked like canned food"/ "W-what?". Her eyes widened.
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"Yeah, I don't know where he got the stuff, but I'll find out"/ "yes, please, if they withhold anything from us, I'll get really angry. I'll make us something to eat now… Wow, salad… at least there are still a few onions and tomatoes growing in the garden". Pauline stood annoyed at the kitchen counter and prepared the food.
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"Are you otherwise well?"/ "Sure, since i'm with you, hn". Pauline is leading a double life at the moment. And that's why she's not always honest. She not only shares a bed with Xander, but also with Hank, with whom the relationship is nevertheless difficult. The official story is that they have broken up. But Pauline has a mind of her own. "Hank and I … That probably wouldn't have worked out in the long run and besides, I really wanted to know who the guy was that he was always talking about when he came home from work …"/ "You've got a thing for bad boys?"/ "hnhn, not really, but you're … Just different, and I like that.".
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Bella comes back into the house. "Where have you been?"/ "I just had to pee"/ "Let me know next time, okay? I don't want you to be out alone in the dark"/ "but I don't want anyone watching"/ "nobody's done that before, we've always stood in front of the fence"/ "but you can hear the peeing noise"/ "Oh nonsense, come on, Pauline's made salad"
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"Salad… Always just salad. Can't we bake a cake again?"/ "We need eggs for that, and they're a bit scarce at the moment because we don't have enough chickens"/ "Then you'll have to get a rooster to make the chicks"/ "Oh, you know that?"/ "Of course, that's what… Mom told me".
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Michael had to smile a little. "Yes, Mom knew a lot…". It's often a difficult situation for Xander when the children talk about their parents. Because it's not just them who have lost their parents, he has too. Until now, there has never been a proper funeral or memorial service for the deceased. Everyone had to deal with the new situation from one day to the next. But some of the residents want to take care of the cemetery soon.
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"And please take care of this 'matter' tomorrow, okay? I really want to know what's going on…"/ "Don't worry, I'll find out what the Altos are up to. "/ "They lead a much better life than some of the others here. They have running water, electricity. They should finally support us. I bet they have some kind of contact with the outside world"/ "mhm, for sure".
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Since Pauline has been living in the house, the atmosphere here has changed. So far, they've managed quite well without another roommate. And of course Michael also understands that you need someone to talk to… But at the moment it's probably just about exchanging bodily fluids. No one will ever be able to properly replace the parents of the two children. But they are being looked after.
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The kids go to bed. "hey, this is actually my bed"/ "but it's much cooler than mine, you built it all by yourself, mine is old"/ "but it's still in good shape…fine, then I'll be the princess tonight"/ "thihi… Which book did you get from the shelf?"/ "You'll notice in a minute".
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While Michael reads his sister a bedtime story, the adults next door are busy with other things. "Have you taken the pill?"/ "That's the last pack I could get, after that we should be really careful"/ "Why, don't you want children?"/ "Under the current circumstances? No…".
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While Michael reads his sister a bedtime story, the adults next door are busy with other things. "Have you taken the pill?"/ "That's the last pack I could get, after that we should be really careful"/ "Why, don't you want children?"/ "Under the current circumstances? No…".
"well, if need be, I can pull 'him' out early"/ "chuckle, but that doesn't always help"/ "I'd say we just take our chances… I'll take care of it, bunny".
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Less than 20 minutes later. "Sleep well, sis… At some point… Hopefully everything will be a bit more normal again. My friends are all madly in love… great, and I'll probably stay a virgin until I'm 30…". It's not easy for Michael to put up with the other couples' affections. Everyone here has their own individual needs.
End of this part
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@greenplumbboblover 😊 , Thanks for tagging me, by the way. Unfortunately, I find it infinitely difficult to pick out a sim and write facts about it. I like them all very much.^^ But if I do come up with something about someone at some point, I'll let you and others know😊
Note: I know some parts are quite long and contain a lot of text, but they can't be split up any other way and I like to write a lot 😉
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astrronomemes · 1 year ago
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PINK: MISUNDERSTOOD STARTERS (PART I)
a collection of lyrics from Pink's Misunderstood album. change & alter as needed.
"I might be the way everybody likes to say."
"I know what you're thinking about me."
"Everything I want, I always do."
"Well, I'm happy, and I'm sad, but everything's good."
"It's not that complicated."
"I'm just misunderstood."
"I just might say goodbye."
"I'm really proud of all the things I used to do."
"I was taken for granted, but it's all good."
"I never win first place."
"My parents hated me."
"I can't do nothing right."
"Every day, I fight a war against the mirror. I can't take the person staring back at me."
"I'm a hazard to myself."
"I'm my own worst enemy."
"It's bad when you annoy yourself."
"I want to be somebody else."
"All you have to change is everything you are."
"She's so pretty. That just ain't me."
"Won't you please prescribe me something?"
"I think I took too much."
"What have you done?"
"I thought it would be fun."
"I think I'll get out of here."
"You're just like a pill. Instead of making me better, you keep making me ill."
"I haven't moved from the spot where you left me."
"This must be a bad trip."
"Maybe I should get some help."
"Everybody is waiting for me to arrive."
"I can go for miles, if you know what I mean."
"I'll be burning rubber. You'll be kissing my ass."
"Everybody's dancing, and they're dancing for me."
"I get really sick and tired of boys up in my face."
"Pick-up lines like what's your sign? won't get you anyplace."
"So, Mr. Big Stuff, who do you think you are?"
"Nothing good comes for free."
"Mirror, mirror, on the wall... damn, I sure look fine."
"I can't blame those horny boys. I would make me mine."
"Back up, boy, I ain't your toy, or your piece of ass."
"Give it up. He won't call you."
"Respect is just the minimum. Go on, girl, and get you some."
"You can't keep me down."
"Hey, hey, man, what's your problem?"
"You don't know what you're up against."
"Maybe you should reconsider, come up with another plan."
"You know I'm not that kind of girl."
"You can push me out the window. I'll just get back up."
"Are you ready for today?"
"You are beautiful, even though you're not for sure."
"You're gonna get your feelings hurt."
"I am only this way because of what you have made me."
"I'm not gonna break."
"[Name], please, stop crying. I can't stand the sound."
"Your pain is painful, and it's tearing me down."
"I told [name] you didn't mean those nasty things you said."
"I don't want love to destroy me like it has done my family."
"Can't we work it out?"
"Can't we be a family?"
"I promise I'll be better."
"[Name], please, stop yelling. I can't stand the sound."
"I don't want to have to split the holidays, I don't want two addresses, I don't want a stepbrother anyways, and I don't want my mom to have to change her last name."
"In our family portrait, we look pretty happy. We look pretty normal. Let's go back to that."
"[Name], don't leave! Turn around, please!"
"The night you left, you took my shining star."
"Don't leave us here alone."
"I'll be so much better! I'll do everything right!"
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lemonyko0 · 2 years ago
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work over pleasure - kth
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in order to have everything, you must first be in a position to lose everything. after divorcing the love of your life, you're already halfway there.
» genre: angst!!!, romance, divorce au, pregnancy.
» word count: 1.8k
work over pleasure - kth
"i'll just send it to you in the mail, don't even think about coming here taehyung or so help me god.” i scold my ex-husband over the phone as he bothers me for the hundredth time this week over something he doesn't need, but insists he does.
it's all just an excuse to come over again. the chance to talk to me in person, to see me, to touch me. i sometimes think he likes to argue for sport, for his own entertainment.
he's plenty aware it's all we do when we see each other yet he's constantly bothering me.
“i'm passing our house on my way to work, why can't i just come get it? you're being ridiculous y/n. can't you stand to face me for a minute?”
i scoff then laugh, “truthfully taehyung? no i can't. and it's my house, not ours. it's in my name and i'm the one paying rent, not you.”
his heavy breathing over the line is all i hear, his telltale sign he's deeply annoyed. “what if i bring your bracelet? can we trade off then?”
the businessman in him shows as he makes a deal he knows i can't refuse. having lapped up my most valuable piece of jewelry ‘by accident’ when he left two months ago.
“fine, just don't be late.”
i can practically see his irritating smirk over the phone, “sure thing baby.”
i simply roll my eyes and end the call, not having the energy to scold him anymore.
i haven't had the energy for anything lately, feeling constantly tired and sore despite doing nothing. i even began getting sick before breakfast every morning, but i had chalked that down to my anxiety over my divorce. a simple coincidence.
a part of me knew the truth deep down, but i couldn't take anymore devastation after dealing with a failed marriage with a man i was still horribly in love with.
taehyung was married to his work, not to me. his loyalty rests in the hands of the company he's so proud of. that's what our divorce was over, and that's what made my situation so much more difficult.
standing alone in what was once my husband and i’s house, with a positive pregnancy test in my hand. everything i was scared of, confirmed with one extra blue line.
i couldn't believe it. i refused to, actually. there was no way. taehyung had made it clear he was too busy to start a family, so we were careful. i knew what was happening to our relationship, i wouldn't have been so stupid.
my heart races as i think of every possible excuse as to why this couldn't possibly be real, until three very loud knocks at my door have my attention pulled elsewhere.
i quickly dry my tears and wash my hands before opening the door to a smug looking taehyung, whose expression falls almost instantly as he sees me.
“why-”
“here's your stuff.” i interrupt him, not wanting an interrogation, or any interaction at all from him. it's his fault after all, why i'm in this mess in the first place.
he takes the box from my hands before digging my bracelet out of his pocket and handing it to me, “here's this, sorry again.”
i nod my head as i take it from his hands. i begin to back away and close the door but he forces it open, “w-wait y/n-”
i scowl at him and whine, “taehyung what do you want from me?”
he grins and steps forward, inviting himself back into his old home, “i smell coffee, and yours is so much better than the stuff we have at work, can you make me a cup please? for old times sake?” he smiles sweetly, knowing i can't turn him down.
i silently step aside, closing the door behind him as he heads straight for the kitchen and i walk slowly behind him.
“love what you've done with the place.” he says to be funny, staring at where our photos used to be, which i replaced with pictures of my dog instead. “you really do love him more than me don't you?”
i scoff, “you love your job more than either of us.”
he gives me a forced grin but doesn't reply. the only noise in the house being the rumbling of the coffee machine as we both eagerly wait for it to finish.
“i'm gonna..” he starts awkwardly, “go to the bathroom.”
i nod, completely zoned out while staring at the coffee.
i grab a cup from the cupboard, pouring it in and dropping in two ice cubes to cool it down. i turn around and place it on the counter he was once leaning against and wait for him to come back.
not a second layer he comes rushing back into the kitchen, looking pale as a ghost. he stares at me, unable to get a single word out.
“what's your problem?” i ask, his expression is almost laughable.
“y-you left something in the bathroom.”
i narrow my eyes at him confusedly, then realizing he may have seen the pregnancy test i had sat on the counter before i opened the door.
“n-no thats not-”
“not yours? you would tell me if you were pregnant right?” he asks while walking towards me. i open my mouth to agree but he interrupts me again, “is it mine? did you already have sex with someone else? i can't believe this.” he runs his hands through his hair as he takes a deep breath in, “what the fuck is happening y/n.”
i stare blankly at the floor. i hadn't gotten this far. i had no idea what i wanted to do about this, i had no idea if i wanted him to be involved at all, i had no idea if he'd even want to be involved.
“i-i just found out.” is all i can safely tell him.
he just sighs, pulling out a chair from the kitchen table but not sitting in it, instead he pulls me over, sitting me down on it before sitting beside me. “it's mine isn't it? i-i mean,” he sighs, running a hand through his hair, “you didn't hook up with someone this soon right?”
i can't muster up the courage to look him in the eyes. unsure of what exactly i was afraid of, possibly the one thing i've always wanted, a real family of my own, being torn away from me so quickly if he tells me he wants nothing to do with this.
“i-it is.” it comes out as a whisper, my voice betraying me before my emotions do, feeling my tears fall again for reasons unbeknownst to me.
“and you just found out? when?”
i look at him for a split second, his expression unreadable as always, “just before you got here.”
“you haven't even been to the doctors yet?” i shake my head. he rises from his seat, grabbing his coffee and phone that were waiting for him on the counter. i start to think maybe this was it, he was finally leaving.
that is until his hand is out in front of me, asking me to take it. i look up at him and he tilts his head, “let's go.”
i take his hand and let him lead me towards the door, putting on my coat for me, “go where?”
he just chuckles, “to the doctors, i want to make sure my baby is healthy.” his behavior confuses me deeply but i let him continue regardless, helping me slip my shoes on as he pauses before opening the door again, “you included, y/n.”
he takes notice of my deeply muddled expression and stops what he's doing. he grabs my hands and looks me in the eyes, attempting to portray his sincerity before he's even spoke, “you don't have to take me back, but if you're gonna go through with this, i can't let you do it alone. even if all you do is yell at me and call me names the whole time, i'll take it all.” he pauses, and i can tell he's struggling to express himself.
“you don't have to taehyung.” i tell him.
“i love you more than anything y/n, i know you don't believe that, you always tell me i'm married to my work and i admit i put it first before you, and i'm sincerely sorry for making you feel ignored and unloved, but i've been trying to tell you this and prove it to you ever since you told me you wanted a divorce. i did it because i want to be able to spoil you and our children, but i went overboard with it and it costed me the greatest thing to ever happen to me in my entire life, so please, let me make it up to you.”
i stare at him, waiting for him to show any signs of regret or dishonesty but he's confident. he smiles and reaches a hand up to my face to wipe away my tears, “i love you.”
i sniffle and look away, “don't say that now.”
“but i mean it.”
i shake my head, “if i could think rationally right now, i would probably be kicking your balls for putting us in this situation.”
my comment does as it's intended to, making us both laugh aloud and ease the mood. i don't want to be mad anymore. i'm tired of being upset and exhausted all the time. i want my husband back, but not because of this.
“taehyung, i really don't want my child to grow up with parents who can't stand to be around each other, who do nothing but bicker endlessly. that's exactly what i had and i can't bring an innocent child into that environment so all i ask is that you prove you've changed. you stay for me, because you love me and you're sorry.”
"i am! i will, i promise.” he says with no hesitation, stepping closer and leaning down, “c-can i kiss you? please?”
“once.” i tell him, knowing i was way too needy and hormonal to say no to him.
he wastes no time giving me a sweet and short kiss to show his gratitude, pulling away with a stupid smile that makes me laugh.
“if they have your smile we’re in trouble.” i tell him, plenty aware he knows it's my favorite thing about him.
“my cute boxy smile.” he mocks me, “the ladies will be all over him.”
“or her.” i correct, not wanting to call it so soon.
he opens the door and slings an arm around my shoulders, “regardless, i'll love them as much as i love you.”
i eye him, “more, i hope.”
he places a gentle kiss on the top of my head and guides me by my arm as he walks me to the car, “i'll spend the rest of my life proving it to you.”
* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚
hello and thank you for reading! if u enjoyed i have a masterlist in my description with all of my current works listed and ordered! have a wonderful day <3 - ara :)
masterlist | taglist
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willowfolksong · 3 years ago
Note
I'm not the original requester but the bonten x model reader headcanons were divine✨😩
So I'll take you up on the offer instead and very kindly request the same prompt for the missing tenjiku members! If you'd like to of course <3
Have a great day and don't forget to drink water xx
The Tenjiku guys dating a model
- Tenjiku x Reader
- NSFW (minors dni)
a/n: hiiiiii anon!!! Thank you so much for your words 🥺✨ I'm extremely happy to comply, and so here's part two with the Tenjiku boys. I hope you enjoy and always let me know what you think! Have a day as beautiful as you and always take the rest you deserve ✨❤
Love,
Willow ❄
Requests are open! ❄
[The Bonten guys dating a model]
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Izana Kurokawa
💎 Your manager recommends you to keep your relationship with Izana under the radar, reasoning that the least you need is to be associated with the leader of a criminal organization. However, Izana is not having any of that.
💎 He's possessive to a sick degree, always carefully following your every move. Soon you have one of his men as a body guard, and there always seems to be people from Tenjiku around. No one ever directly addresses the issue, but soon magazines and other media start to link you with the famous criminal boss.
💎He hates every interview, every show go, every photoshoot. You're for his eyes only. He owns you, since the first time your eyes met across the club.
💎When you two are along, you never know what to expect. It can be a sweet, gentle loving Izana that worships your body and makes sure you're completely spent by the time the next day comes. He'll make the room your little sanctuary, making love to you slowly, only to hug you after, burying his face in your chest, asking you to hold him. In those rare moments, he'll tell you stories about his siblings, about his childhood and his dreams of one day, maybe, having a family of his own— while his eyes bore into yours with an intensity that makes you believe he would leave everything behind to start a new future with you, if only you asked him to.
💎But the rest of the time, he's ruthless. Pining you to the bed, ass up and nothing but the stinging feeling of his hand on your butt. Izana loves to mark you.
"Izana, please..." you sob, burying your face on the sheets as your boyfriend fucks you violently from behind.
You ache for relief, after all the times he has left you hanging.
But he does it again, stopping all together and pushing his sweaty hair away from his face. You can't see the manic look on his eyes, nor the way he leans over you, his lips so close to your ear.
You can only feel.
"That's not how I told you to call me, whore" he says, and grabs your head to tilt it back with a groan "Try it again"
"Please..."
"You won't cum today, unless you do" he warns you, and his hips give an experimental roll that leaves you huffing, eyes rolling back.
"Please, sir"
Only then does Izana straightens his back, loosely grabbing your hips and licking his bottom lip.
"Now move your hips and make yourself cum on my cock"
Shion Madarame
💎 You meet him at a party in a club. You weren't looking for some fun, you were just there because it was one of your friend's from the agency's birthday. And so bored out of your mind, you lift your eyes and find his across the dancefloor.
💎 He ends up fucking you in the bathroom, your hips bouncing on his lap while he seats in one of the toilets, whispering dirty stuff in your ear.
💎You don't know how he manages to get your number after that— especially since you're a celebrity. But he does. And won't leave you alone until you two meet again.
💎 Your relationship is based on amazing sex, and the power he has to make you feel free. You spend your days being careful, smiling for the cameras and trying to be on your best behavior for your fans. With Shion, you can be anything you want.
💎 He loves dirty talking. Calling you a whore, taunting you, making you lose your composure. You've never had someone degrade you like that— and you love it. With him, you're not the perfect model that appears on magazines, you're nothing but his slut, one that would do anything and everything.
"There you go. Just like that...— fuck, you take my cock like you were meant for it" he groans, his hips moving in tandem with yours.
He has you doubled over the bathroom's counter, and you would smile at the fact that you two have history in places like that, if it wasn't because his cock inside you doesn't lets you think clearly.
"I was made for your cock" you answer instead, moaning loudly, as his fingers dig on the skin of your hips, where there's a little hidden tattoo of a lion he convinced you to have, so you could match.
He laughs, and his eyes find yours in the mirror "Moaning like that... do you want people to hear us?" he asks, and leans forward to grab your chin on his hand, his eyes never leaving yours "Is that what you want? For everyone in the party to hear how I fuck your brains out in the bathroom?"
"Yes!" you scream, and he bites behind your ear. Hard "That's what I want!"
His smirk promises he'll have you moaning even louder sooner.
Yasuhiro Muto
💎 He treats you like a queen from the moment you two meet, and you sometimes even forget you're dealing with an actual criminal.
💎 You feel safe, and protected, and arriving to every place with his arm around your waist is always the best feeling.
💎 He loves to watch you, to see you model and dressed on pretty clothes. And one day, he confesses to you in bed that he always found you incredibly beautiful.
💎When you finally convince him to go with you to a photoshoot, he spends the whole two hours staring straight at you, eyes never leaving your face. Yasuhiro doesn't moves from his spot on the couch by the corner, and his eyes bore into yours every time you turn around and smile for the picture— but in reality is just for him. Cigarette hanging from his mouth, his arms on the back of the couch, you can only think about crawling to his lap.
💎He makes love to you slowly, and passionate, making sure to tend to all your needs. His favorite thing in he world is having you between his legs, sucking him off, while he promises to take care of you right after.
"Right there, good girl" he praises you, grabbing the back of your neck in one hand and pushing you closer to the base of his cock. You look at him, teary eyed and flushed all the way down to your niples, and he sighs contentedly, leaning his back against the chair "You always suck me off so good. Just there, just— yeah... suck on the tip"
When you do, putting all your effort into it, he groans and hosts you up, sitting you on his lap.
"What's wrong?" you ask him, and he traces your bottom lip with his finger before sliding his other hand down to play with your nipples.
"Is my turn to take care of you now"
Kisaki Tetta
💎You're not sure if Kisaki is even capable of actually loving someone, but you just can't stay away from him.
💎 He pulls you, draws you towards him with his words and his charm. He always seems to know what you want to hear, and when.
💎You don't know about love, but you're sure that he has developed a slight obsession with you.
💎 He tries to keep you away from your friends the most, and he dislikes when you go to other celebrities parties and events. You have a feeling that deep down he's incredibly insecure, borderline neurotic, because he wants to be the only one you pay attention to.
💎 He never denies disliking what you do, always finding time to tell you how much he hates that you're in every billboard around the city, while he's buried deep inside you.
"Do you like that?" he asks you, even when you can't answer with his hand covering your mouth. "Do you like being up there, for everyone to see it? Do you get off on that?" you're going to shake your head no, but then his hips are moving faster against yours, and your eyes roll to the back of your head in ecstasy. "One day...— fuck... one day I'm going to make sure they all se who's the one you come back every night"
Hajime Kokonoi
💎Hajime is incredibly reluctant to get involved with you at first, because of his past and everything that happened with Akane.
💎 You still manage to crawl inside his chest and stay there, and when he finds himself looking for any picture he can of yours in magazines he doesn't even reads, or watching shows he wouldn't before just to see if you're on them, he knows he's a goner.
💎 His attentions start slow, measured and content. He tries to think about you the less possible, only calling to see you when he just cant stand being apart from you any longer.
💎However, that soon changes. When he falls, he falls hard, and is sudenly faced with the terrible feeling that he could lose you at any moment— celebrities having such a high exposure life.
💎 He won't let that happen to you. He won't lose the love of his life again, and so he makes his personal goal to always keep you safe.
"I won't lose you" he whispers in your ear, once you're asleep in his arms after an intense lovemaking session "I won't lose you. Not you. That won't happen again. You're never leaving my side"
Shuji Hanma
💎You're the only thing he doesn't thinks he could get bored of.
💎 He yearns for you in a way he never did for anyone, and it doesn't help the fact that he can see your face everywhere: every poster, every magazine, every billboard on the street.
💎 And so he's usually pleasuring himself, a crumpled picture of you modeling some pretty clothes in his free hand, because the urge can become just too much, and he just can't wait enough to see you.
💎 He fucks you at a frenzy, wild rhythm that always leaves you exhausted and sore all over. And you know he's especially enthusiastic after a fight, when he comes to you covered in blood and his eyes are full of fire. Those are the times where he takes you the hardest, your loud moans only music to his ears.
💎And then always after, he falls into your arms with ease, content with closing his eyes and basking in the smell of your hair.
"I want to stay in this bed forever" he tells you, and you smile and pet his hair.
"Really?"
"I have you here. I can fuck you whenever I want. What more do I even want? We just need someone to do stuff for us. Bring food an stuff"
You silence him with a kiss, and soon he's pining you on the bed again.
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Note
Happy Valentine’s! You’re absolutely amazing for doing this! 💛💛💛
May I please get a letter from Quinn Hughes? I don’t have anything specific in mind expect that Quinn and reader can’t physically spend valentines together for whatever reason. I’m such a sucker for handwritten letters (even though I know this is typed, same diff). The rest is up to you. I know you’ll do this justice.
Please and thank you! You’re absolutely incredible
awww thanks m! here ya go.
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Hi babe, It’s Q. I am so sorry that I can't be there for Valentine’s Day. You can blame Jack. We are all pretty sure that he’s the one that got us sick.
I have a surprise though, Petey will swing by around 5:30 today and bring you some flowers. Until then, I hope I can do this letter-thingy some justice. Keep in mind that I have the writing skills of a toddler. If I'm being honest, I have brock on the other side of the phone coaching me through this. I am also keeping my fingers crossed that it gets to you in time. Don't worry, these things usually work out for me.
 God, I miss you but then again, I’m so happy you didn’t come to all-stars and get sick. I hope you know the only thing I care about is that you're safe and healthy. That’s what it’s always been about for me. I am so thankful that you chose me to be the one making sure that you are living the best life possible,
Baby. I don’t care if I have to be away for a little longer as long as I can see your lovely face when I get home and that I can know I kept you safe from all this covid-19 stuff. We will do everything I promised we would when I left for Vegas. Dinner and a movie? As long as you don't make me watch The Titanic for the seventh time. That movie is way too fucking long! Just kidding. We can watch anything as long as I get to hold you when you cry and see the way you smile when you get all happy.
Maybe after my quarantine, we could take a road trip and book a nice hotel room. We can make time to go wherever you want. Mom says that I need to make more time for the people I love. Also, my mom has been non-stop talking about you since Hanukkah. They want to have you out to Michigan soon. The both of us should go there as our first stop as soon as the season is over.
The core four of me, you, Jack, and Luke could all go boating. It will be the last summer before Luke is in the NHL and Jack takes all his free time. So we better make this summer the best yet. All of us could drive down to Alberta and take Luke for his first drink at a bar! You have to be the one to take Luke. Mom says, "Y/n is the only one responsible enough," to do that with him. She does NOT trust Jack much after the first time he went drinking. 
Do you remember that? Jack had called us at four a.m. Just because he was shitfaced and he cried on the phone with you because he needed a ride back to the hotel. You almost killed him because we were so jet-lagged after just getting back to Vancouver from Hawaii.
Mom was just happy that he wasn't hurt. Still, I got yelled at for eight days after that night. Yet, it showed me how much you care for my brothers and mom. I love how you are with my family. It’s like you just fit with us. It’s weird not having you here quarantining with us in Vegas. However, I am sure the boys and my mom will find a way to spend more time with us soon.
I need alone time with you first.  I will need some TLC after having to stop Jack from letting all-stars get to his ego. I can’t wait to be back in our bed for nightly cuddles. Oh, and your cooking. My god, you are a great cook. I swear I keep missing your homemade Mac’n’Cheese because I am getting sick of take-out fast. We have been keeping track, Zegras ordered us room service burgers six times since all-stars skills night.
Most of all, I can not wait to get back to normal. You never know how much you keep me grounded. The family and I can't wait for me to get back on the ice. Then, things will start going smoothly again. Especially, once you’re in the crowd cheering me on. This quarantine has reminded me of how happy I am to have a cheerleader like you. Anyways, I’ll be home soon, I promise. Then I can fix the you-sized hole in my heart. We could order some food and FaceTime tonight? You should text me and let me know if you can. Until then, I will be waiting for you to call me!
Love you forever and always,  Your Quinner. 
Taglist: @hugheshugs @nucksgal03 @snugglyducklingbrewhouse @oowenspower
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aureiki · 3 years ago
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This is a continuation of my last post regarding the cast's backstories! Before I do anything, big shoutout to the discord for helping me out a lil on some of these.
While I was discussing backstories w some friends, they brought up a theory that since the themes are guilt/shame or whatever similar, the cast had probably done something awful. Such as yk, murder and the sorts. I'll most likely talk about these themes below! A prior warning for it.
I'll hopefully make this a little more longer, so without further ado-
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
Rose Lacroix
"In the end, the only thing I can do is watch my wretched life go on."
It's basic knowledge in the community that Rose has INCREDIBLE photographic memory, and that she'll remember, well literally anything. As helpful as it was in the first case, and her actual ultimate, it's also definitely a huge inconvenience to her normal life.
She can remember ANYTHING, Rose has obviously seen some pretty... nasty things she'd like to forget, but can't. The way she calls her life wretched does show that she's- unhappy? Annoyed with her life? Well, nobody can really blame her.
If Rose did end up killing a person, and if not that, put them in an awful state with her own hands. It'd make sense yk? It'll obviously be a memory she'd rather forget but cant. And thus the HQ, in the end, all she can do is watch. Death is a scary thing after all. (Coughs coughs feed into my theory she will commit s word in the future coughs)
J Moreno
"Please don’t call me your daughter ever again."
Luckily for me, a lot of her backstory was revealed in the newest FTE video! It was theorized for a while, and I'm not shocked to find out it's actually canon! (/pos)
Her mother dressed her up all girly and stuff, made her do things that 'girls should always do.' Telling J that 'swearing isn't lady-like!' Wear makeup everyday! Don't cut your hair too short, no one will marry you if you look like a guy!'
Something I can (unfortunately) relate to, in fact a lot of girls do. J also reveals that her brother never had to go through that stuff, and was left to do whatever he wanted, much to J's jealousy.
When a parent drills the mindset that girls should ALWAYS be girly, and boys should ALWAYS be rough and rowdy, it'll really change how their kids see things. Thus, J was just lead to believe that all girly girls are lame and annoying (because well, her mother forced her to be one) while boys are cool and whatever (her brother didn't get annoyed by their mother, and J was just likely sick of being feminine.)
Personally I don't feel like getting into gender talk regarding J, I'm not cis of course but I'd rather leave it as it is, headcanons and all ^^
J does also reveal she really hates her mom, calling her annoying and stuff. For the fact that her mom forced her to be girly. I'm not saying that's a bad reason to dislike someone, personally I have a little dislike for my own parents for those same reasons. But I'm wondering just how bad did it get for J to act and behave that way.
The whole guilt and shame thing? With this alone, I'm not quite sure.. If her mother is important, then maybe J feels guilt for pushing her mother (or even, her whole family) out of her life? Or if I go to the more extreme route, J did/said something bad to her mom in a fit of rage, and caused her mom's own death.
Eden Tobisa
"You can’t go back, no matter how hard you try."
What I like about Eden's HQ is that it's sort of a play on her talent. (Go back/Turn back time) Unlike a good majority of the cast, Eden isn't an asshole, so it's a lot more unbelievable that she did something bad.. to me atleast.
Fits the guilt and shame theme, Eden desperately wants to go back, perhaps to a time when things were simple, or reverse an accident she caused. Eden is quite the foil of Teruko, being so willing to trust her in the trial despite being the most obvious suspect for Xander's death. And she was the (assumed) most upset over Teruko leaving, and Teruko's sudden outburst in the trial.
With that being said, I don't think the HQ refers to Eden's own actions *specifically*, not fully atleast. It could be an accident someone else caused, and Eden wants to go back to a time where it never happened. There's also the fact she's pretty awful at time management (ironic, she's a clockmaker)
Tuning out everything else while you work is normal, I do that. But for her to work on machinery for *14 hours without a single break*? It's very likely a joke, with the way she says it so casually but I dunno.. Maybe she wishes to be ignorant, like Rose, she wants to forget what happened and what she's done.
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
That's all for today! Again, I'll do the rest when I have time! You're free to discuss more and add anything if u wish! ( ๑>ᴗ<๑ )
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tendousthoughts · 3 years ago
Text
HQ Boys Thinking Their S/O Left Them Pt. 3
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Character(s) included: Oikawa & Kyoutani
Requested by: @chibiiichann
Warning(s): Cursing, Mention of bullying [Oikawa], Mention of flinching [Kyoutani], Hints towards readers tough past [Kyoutani]
Song of the day: Trees II by McCfferty
A/N: First off thanks for 200- I know I said it a lot but I’m just so glad! Next, many of you haven’t seen but I have updated a few things. One of the biggest being my name I go by. At the moment I’m trying out Xic. I also noted my pronouns and stuff. Which you can all find on my announcements post. Now back to some more ‘important’ things [though this is important, this is not why you came here!]. Sorry about the long wait for part three! Please read through the warnings again to make sure everything is okay. Thank you for everything. Bye!
Where to find all the parts!
Where to find all my content!
Tag(s): @chibiiichann & @corporeal-terrestrial
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Oikawa
He was at it again. Working late nights and shit. You were happy for him. You were. Of course you were. He was back doing what he loved. He was back playing volleyball. With that happiness also came fear and worry. You knew how he was. Everyone who ever met him, knew how he was. He over worked himself. He always did and scared you. No matter how hard he tried not to. He pushed himself past his limits. Even after the doctor already told him, if he didn’t ease up on the practice, his knee would get even worse. But he was Oikawa Tōru. Determined and intelligent.
It was ten thirty and he already missed your date. Which you expected to happen, but it still kind of hurt. You tried calling for the fifth time that night, but you were met with the same thing. After a few rings it went to voicemail.
“Hey! You’ve reached the voicemail of Oikawa Tōru, thank you for calling! At the moment I’m busy but I promise after I’m done I’ll call you back. If you want, leave me a message and I’ll get back to you. Byeee!”
You waited all night for him to come home around twelve thirty. He looked tired. Extremely tired and to be honest that pissed you off more. Not only did he not respond but he over worked himself again, and when he woke up the next night sore, you were the one who would have to take care of him.
Instead of bringing it up you waited for the morning. Not wanting to have this conversation while he was tired. It would feel like you were talking to yourself, and he wouldn’t understand. So you went to bed with him and by the morning he was already up before you.
You went to the kitchen to find him shuffling through your medication bin. “Are you sore?” You ask, looking at him.
“I’ll be fine, I just need breakfast and some medicine,” he muttered. He couldn’t have cared less. At least that’s what it looked like. He didn’t even spare you a glance.
“Maybe you should listen. You know, lay off volleyball practice for a day or something. Try to lesson the hours and stuff..” You looked back at him for his reaction.
“Can’t. If I ease up I’ll never be able to catch up.” He finally looked to you now, finding the medicine.
“I mean I think you will be fine. It is taking over your whole life and stuff so I just don’t want it to be a bigger issue. Like you know.. with your knees and stuff.” Your eyes are pinned on him.
“I told you not to worry about my knee, and it’s not taking up my life okay? It has and will always be my life. It’s the only thing I’m good at. So no, I'm not going to take a break.” He snapped at you. Which caught you off guard.
“It is… It is taking up your life,” you replied which made his face change.
“You don’t understand how it is like me. You don’t! I understand you don’t have anything you're good at and shit. But you have to understand that I actually have goals in life okay? You have to understand that my fucking life won’t revolve around you and how you feel when I do something. It won’t and never will. You and I are together because I feel like having you around. Because you know what, volleyball is the only thing that distracts me from leaving. Volleyball is the only thing I can do to escape you!” He screamed.
It takes a few seconds for the weight of his words to sink into your skin. But here’s the thing. You knew what you were up against when you started dating him. He just lit a fuse in you. A spark that made an explosion of feelings hit you. When it did you couldn’t control your words. “After all that practice I wondered why you never made it to nationals. I mean seriously. You need a distraction from me, right? Your always doing it, and get you can’t even fucking get to nationals. Not only that but I can see why your last girlfriend left you. You're a dick. You can’t remember a fucking date. A fucking date we have been planning for weeks. Oh wait, let me correct that, a date I’ve been planning for weeks. Not only that but I took my fucking time to work around your schedule. For you not to even send a message.” You spat out. You looked down at him, “I wonder sometimes if everyone was right. You and me. Never belonged. I’m just a distraction from such a ‘handsome’ and ‘kind’ person.”
He looked hurt at first, but then again he started it and intended to finish it. “I can see why your whole family doesn’t talk to you. You always think you're the best or something. Maybe I remembered the date. Have you ever thought of that? Maybe I didn’t wanna hangout with you. Maybe I didn’t want to hear you nagging me every fucking second. You know what? I can see why people fucking hate you. Bully you and shit. Your such a fucking selfish freak.”
“What..?” You looked at him. You told him you were bullied, because you thought of him as your safe space. You thought of him as the only person who understood you. You felt safe when he was around you. You felt understood. To use that against you. To say you deserved it. To say you deserved to get hurt. To get shamed. To get everything that happened to you… it was your fault?
“What are you too dumb to understand?” He laughed at you. Hatred and venom spilling from his lips. “Awe.. look at the baby. You should be grateful I didn't break up with you. You should be thankful because I’m the only reason you're even someone.”
Tears filled your eyes. “God fucking damn it.” You muttered softly. You weren’t going to allow him to take you down. You were stronger then he would ever understand. “You really think anyone wants to hang out with you..? Do you fucking think anyone find you a good person..? Your just a fucking pretty face, okay? Your nothing compared to anyone else on your team. You might not realize it but to be honest sometimes I do want to be set free. Set free from this shitty relationship okay? That’s the truth. Sometimes I get sick of having to take care of you. When your fucking sore before you over works your self again. I am the only one trying to keep you okay. I’m the only one who actually thinks about the long run. No matter how hard you practice in the end you won’t even be able to walk. Let alone play volleyball and shit. You know what sometimes I get sick of being the only fucking one trying to keep us together.”
“Then maybe you should give up okay. Maybe we should finally go our separate ways. I mean after all, you're too easy.” He was hurt. He just blurted out whatever he thought would hurt you the most. Which fucking worked. Before you had said anything more he had left the room, leaving you stunned.
It took a moment but before you knew it you were out of the house, crying and walking the farthest away from your shared house as you could. “Fuck..” you whisper. Did he really not want to be with you..? You should have known. This relationship wasn’t a relationship. You barely talked. You felt alone. So fucking alone.
It took an hour for him to fully cool down. When he walked out of the room he was expecting you to be waiting for him. He was expecting everything to be okay. When he was met with the emptiness. The emptiness of you being actually gone. He was met with the realization that his words were taken just how he thought he wanted them to be.
You on the other hand we’re at the park blasting music in your ears. Forcing the thoughts to be pushed deep down. Forcing you to forget everything. Everything that hurts you. Maybe it would be best if you guys did go your separate ways..? You knew this wasn’t good for your mental health. But fuck that. This was the only thing that made you feel grounded. Made you feel okay. When he wasn’t with you or practicing he was out with friends, drinking and partying. You couldn’t continue to live like this. So maybe it would be best to let go. To give up on everything and everything you loved… your everything was him. You always argued and at this point you felt sick. Thinking about it just broke you. You had no more tears to cry, with your tear stained cheeks you decided to go back. To your home. It was over. Everything you had built up was coming crashing down.
On his side he was freaking out. He knew he was in the wrong. He knew there was no excuse for what he did to you, but what could he say? You were gone already. It took a bit for him to get to the nerve to call you. To his surprise he heard the sound of your ringing phone. So you left it. Maybe you were going to come back. Maybe you will and then everything will be okay again. Maybe everything would be perfect. It was a small chance but that's all he could hold on to.
When you walked in it was quiet, but there were soft whimpers and cries coming from your shared room. Gently you knocked on the door and waited for a response. You were surprised when you immediately heard a stumble and then were met with a hug. Your shoulder almost immediately feels wet to the touch. “Ba.. Oikawa..?” You muttered.
“Please don’t call me that.. please..” He muttered softly. His face buried deep into your clothes.
You kinda ignored his response. “I came back to get my stuff. I took into consideration what you said and I realized that you don’t deserve to be distracted by me all the time..” You whispered softly. “So like you said earlier.. I think it is best if we stop seeing each other.. entirely because I don’t know if I could let you go otherwise..”
His arms tightened around you, “C..can we please talk about it first.. please..” his nightmare was coming true, and maybe it was dumb but he didn’t realize how much he needed you.
“There’s nothing to talk about.. I don’t understand why you want to make it harder on me. I gave you what you wanted okay..? You can practice your heart out and hangout with your friends and stuff okay? You can finally find someone who will fit all your needs. You and I both know that I will never be what you want. So maybe it would be best if we just let go..”
“No… please no.. that’s not what I want.. I want to make it up to you and be there for you and I want to make you happy and I want everything to be perfect. I know I messed up okay? I don’t deserve you and I don’t know what came over me today because you're everything I’ve ever wanted. I know I don’t deserve it and there’s no excuse for what I said or did… I know I should let you find someone better but I love you. I love you so fucking much. I know I’ve been lacking and I want to make up for it. I want to be someone you want to be around again.. I love you so fucking much okay? I should have been there. I shouldn’t have said the things I did. I know I don’t deserve a second chance but please.. just one more.. I promise I’ll make it up to you.” He didn’t want to let go of everything.
“I’m sorry too.. you didn’t deserve it. I’m sorry for everything and that’s why I want to let you go. To find someone who will not hurt you like I hurt you.. You and I both know that I can't resist it. I don’t know why you do this to me.. pull me back.. you have one more chance… Please don’t make me regret it. I really love you but this.. this isn’t going to work if we do what we are doing now okay? We will just tear each other more and more apart..” you whispered gently, kissing his head. Your arms finally meet his back as you hold him. “I’m sorry.. but I’ve got you now baby. I love you so fucking much..”
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Kyoutani
Kyoutani was the type of person most people would never understand. Not because they were “difficult” or anything.. they just never took the time too. Well other than you. You were different. You understood his outburst and such. But at the same time you were human. There was only so much you could take. There was only so much you would take.
When he came into the locker room you were already waiting for him. He had been thrown out of the game for fighting with a few people. You knew he was frustrated. You could hear the crowd from a mile away shouting to kick him off. It was harsh. Even for ‘mad dog’ which he hated to be called. He hated to be tied to an animal.. and always being an angry reck. Anybody would. But of course nobody understood other than you. When he sat on the bench you immediately rushed over.
“Baby.. I’m sorry.. You didn’t deserve that.. just ignore them, please. I know it’s hard but their not important okay..?” You we’re just trying to comfort him. But there were times when Kyoutani couldn’t control himself. Like any other person when they get looked down at every fucking moment of their lives. When they are ridiculed and laughed at all the time. When they are nothing more than an angry person.. Sometimes there is nothing more to do than be the person everyone so desperately makes you out to be.
“Not important? Not important! I just got fucking kicked from the game because of them chanting to kick me. They didn’t even fucking have the decency to call me by my name. So don’t tell me it’s okay and that their opinion on me doesn’t matter. Because quite frankly their opinion is the only one that matters it seems.” He lashed out.
“I didn’t mean to upset you. It’s just that.. it wasn’t entirely their fault. You were arguing with the other team members.” You muttered. It wasn’t meant to do any harm, just for him to keep in mind.
“Are you serious right now.? Nobody else got kicked. Nobody. If they can’t handle a little trash talking, maybe they shouldn’t play a sport. I mean seriously there’s no need for them to tell the referees to kick me.” He started raising his voice when he spoke.
“I know it’s just that.. maybe you should try and not trash talk you know?” You whispered softly, retreating a bit.
“What?” He looked annoyed. “God ducking damn it. How can you be so cute but so fucking annoying. I mean seriously how can someone with such a face be so fucking dumb and so annoying?” His hands were balled into fist
“I..I don’t understand, can you tell me why you act so sweet..? Then so cold the next moment..? You don’t mean it right..? Please say you don’t mean it.” You were worried you loved him but god it was hard. It was hard to respond when your friends asked about your relationship. It was hard when they flaunted their perfect relationship and then asked about yours. Its was so fucking hard.
“Do you think I would say it otherwise..?” He looked at you. He laughed at you as he saw your pitiful expression. God it was almost sickening how much he saw that expression. That expression that nobody else had ever shown him. The one of worry  but at the same time already knowing it was coming. He loved it. He loved everything about you. But most of the time you pissed him off. This relationship wasn’t healthy. But for god sake you already started counseling. But fuck this was a bad idea.
Silence. Nothing could come out. You wanted to scream. You wanted to forget this. You wanted it to stop. Everything to stop.
“Answer me.” He punched the wall next to you. Fear spreading all over your face. Fuck. Fuck. Not here. Please no. He gripped your warm face making it so cold in seconds. Forcing you to look at him he laughed at your crying face. But when you didn’t stop for a minute he immediately backed away. He fucked up. He knew he fucked up. “Wait I’m sorry baby..” he muttered.
“Please stop. Please. I won’t do it again.” Flashbacks we’re pulling you way too far out. You were drowning. No one was around to save you. He was laughing as you begged to be saved, pushing you deeper into your own pool of your own thoughts. You were so cold. The next second you were able to move back to the surface.
Realization hit as he stepped back. “I..I am sorry..” he muttered softly as he left the room without another word leaving his mouth. Words were banging on his lips but he knew if he spilled them out everything out it would just hurt you ten times more.
You got up five minutes later, finally pulled back to reality and decided to get up. Grabbing your stuff you walked back into the stadium. Waving a small wave to the rest of his team before exiting. Confusion was read all over as they saw your tear stained face. To be honest, all that was running through your mind was that you didn’t want Kyoutani to break up with you. You didn’t want to be alone, again. You didn’t want to be just another one of his ex’s. So for the better of both of you it would be best to leave him be. To let him cool off.. for him to feel better.
He was freaking out. He fucked up. You. You were his everything, not only that but you were more than just that. You were like a fucking rainbow at the end of a rainy day. You were his partner in crime. You made him feel normal, you made him feel safe, and loved. He couldn’t believe he just put that all in danger. He just put everything on the line because of some stupid game. He hit the wall hard, “fuck me. I’m sorry y/n..” he muttered as he sank to the floor and balled up. Tears burning through his eyes. He did the one thing he promised you that he would protect you from. You became the one thing he was always scared of becoming. He loved you so much, he love you so fucking much.
You left and got into your car. Sinking into your seat you locked the doors, and hit the steering wheel. Taking a deep breath salty tears rolled down your already stained face. Placing the key in and turning it the car started. Next thing you knew you had left wherever you could go. You loved him. So fucking much. But it was hard to be okay when he acted so fucking rough with you. It was hard to stay calm and not imagine your past relationship in this one. You tried. You really did but god it was hard to feel okay, feel okay about everything happening around you. It was too much. So fucking much. It made your head hurt.
When the game ended Kyoutani was still freaking out, now moved back into the lockers. He didn’t know what he was expecting but he knew he hoped you would still be there. God damn it. He fucked up. You had left. You were gone. Tears brimming his eyes as he teammates walked in. Now mentioning it to his teammates their faces seemed to change. More salty fucking tears left his eyes, as he heard about what type of pain you looked like you were in.
You headed back to your shared place. Unsure where else to go. You weren’t close with your family anymore. You had no friends. You had no work buddies. You had nobody but Kyoutani and in turn, now you were left alone with the thought of everything being gone. Ripped right out of your hands as you're forced to watch your whole world come crumbling down on you. You placed your stuff down on the side and laid on the bed. It smelled just like safety. Just like Kyoutani. You just wanted to be held. You just wanted everything to be perfect, again. To be okay at least. You needed him more than anything.
After a night out he finally made it back to your shared place. He didn’t want to be back without you, but you weren’t answering and he didn’t know what else to do. When he walked into the apartment he slowly walked into your shared room. There he saw you. Laying in bed cuddled up in the blankets. Slowly and carefully he walked up. Not wanting to cause you any more hurt. He missed you. Even for a few hours he had felt like he hadn’t seen you in years. But maybe that was because he thought that’s what might have happened. Maybe he thought you had left for good. Maybe he thought he would never have the chance to apologize. Never have the chance to hold you again. When he reached the bed he noticed that you were awake. “Hey y/n..” he muttered softly. The silence was killing him. “I’m so sorry. I know I fucked up. I promised to make you feel safe and protected around me. I made a promise to keep you safe and protected. I broke both of those. I fucked up. I know I did. I lashed out again. I did exactly what everyone says I do. I just get so fucking heated for no reason and I know I shouldn’t and I know I should just relax. But I feel like if I do the worlds would burn though my throat and then it would just explode.. and I know it’s stupid and I know I end up hurting you more. I know that there is no good reason to do that. But I just.. I don’t know. You're the only one that makes me feel normal okay..? I know it’s not fair. I know it’s not. You just make me feel like whenever I’m with you that I’m floating. I just want everything to be okay again. I want everything to be back to normal. I know I should give you space but I missed you so much. I don’t want you to leave, please don’t leave..” he was crying again. He barely had any tears left to cry. He wanted to hold you but he knew it was a stupid idea. “I’m sorry for being so selfish.. but please..”
You never really heard him or saw him crack. But fuck. It hurts you so much. To see him beg for you to stay with him. What were you supposed to do..? Leave him now? That was never even the plan. You didn’t have a plan to be honest. You sat up biting your lip before you gently held him. “Hey baby it will be okay.. calm down I’ve got you.. I’m not going anywhere now. I promise you I’m not going anywhere.” You muttered softly. He melted into your touch. He knew he didn’t deserve it but he felt like he couldn’t breathe. “Shush… I’ve got you.. take a deep breath..” you mumbled softly kissing his head as he took deep breaths. Soon enough he was relaxed in your arms again. “You know and I know that I love you so much. But there’s a line between where I can take it and I can’t. I understand you get frustrated but I don’t deserve to be treated like that. I don’t deserve to be scared of being hit.. and I know we both know that. I try to be understanding but you need to try to be too okay..? I love you so much.. more than you might believe but Kyoutani I can’t handle being in a relationship with you if you're constantly annoyed or angry with me. I think we deserve to be happy.. and if that means needing to take a break then we would have to okay? You need to work on communicating. I know it can be hard.. but please..” you whispered. Tears flowing down your soft skin again. It was getting a lot. So it would be best if you told him… you needed him to understand.
He gently shook his head. He understood. He knew he was in the wrong. He knew he was lucky for you to be holding him.. for him to even still be in a relationship with you let alone it be still a romantic one. He loved you and he knew you didn’t deserve anything that he put you through. In the end all that mattered was you in his eyes. He was going to change.. he was. “I promise.. thank you y/n..” he whispered softly. Gently he wrapped his arms around you. “I love you so much..” he muttered. Everything would be okay.. he knew it was going to be now. All that mattered was that you were safe. That you were happy.. that you were in his arms again.
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crustymeowman · 2 years ago
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[ crusty rants #2: dual edition!! ]
AD: This volume of crusty rants is brought to you by Dual Argument Shampoo for Eyes. Become the pain in the butt, live out your debate urges. Just joking, eat your opponent's eyeballs. That's Dual Argument Shampoo.
This Program is rated whatever Alexander and Hephastion got on. May contain themes about family issues and verbal fights. Viewer discretion is advised.
Welcome back, I am your host crustymeowman, you can call me crusty.
( AUDIENCE LAUGHS FOR NO REASON )
Today is a very special edition to crusty rants as it has two rants in one post. I learnt the other day when sitting at the table, alone because my wife left that I really hate venting in Discord Channels.
( AUDIENCE FUCKING LAUGHS AGAIN, FOR NO REASON )
I like the concept but I found I like to blog on Tumblr.com because it sort of has that thing where people don't feel entitled to respond. And I like to call my venting more of ranting as you know us sad men, we love to rant about our troubles.
( WHY DOES THE AUDIENCE LAUGH AGAIN. I'M LOOSING IT CRUSTY )
So I wondered why I started this show, why this platform of all things. You know, I enjoy the style of social media this platform carries consistently well.. more very consistently. I'm looking at you Tumblr TV.
( AUDIENCE LAUGH?? )
That aside I have to introduce today's rants. Drum roll please!
( DRUM ROLL SOUND )
My shittyness towards people + a reflection rant on an incident that happened 7 months ago! Woo give a round of a clause people!
( AUDIENCE OBEDIENTLY CLAPS )
Let's start with the first one.
Here I'm going to give a little bit of context. Lately I have been on and off fights with my mother, with stuff like not doing something asked straight way or a slight offset in the tone of my voice. Heck, the tone of my voice is the reason why we get into these hectic fights in the first place. I am nearing the end of a school pathway that was never right for me in the first place and it's stressful. You know that feeling like you want to be glad you are doing something better for yourself, but also like you feel it's a bad idea? All the time man. All the time. But it's worst because we are told whatever we do now, is going to impact our lives. I constantly make impulsive decisions and switching out now, feels like a bad idea. I feel like I'm doing to to be impulsive.
This seems to impact my current relationship with my mother. I don't mean to hurt her with the way I act but sometimes on top of what I said before, school and that way she tries to control what I do, it sets me over the edge. I yell back, I argue back. I'm having screaming fights to fight for my own justice because I'm sick of the little things that annoy me.
But it's whats said that makes me think I'm hurting her. "You cause me stress." That's what she has told me numerous times. It hurts yes, and I understand that I might've been acting and responding in a way so I can understand where she might've been coming from.
We fight mostly also about our miscommunication. I can't find the obvious from her vagueness and she can't tell what I mean half the time. We had a small little fight this morning when she asked me, "How are you cooking the chicken?" which I responded in a jokey manner of, "In a pan?". She thought I understood what she meant; she meant how was I going to cook the pasta sauce for my assignment. I can never really joke around because it's a fifty-fifty chance she might not get the joke. So doing this was playing a dangerous game. Very dangerous game.
( AUDIENCE CONFUSED LAUGH. THEY WERE PROMPTED TO BY LORD FARQUAD'S GUARDS )
It's just not her I feel like I'm hurting. I feel like I'm hurting my friends being just there, making things difficult for everyone. My problems and making things hard for everyone just to get along. I hurt my friend that time when we had that friend group, because I was trying to help her do the math for the costs going out. She got upset but that was not was I intending. I don't intend to hurt my friends. never have been. Though I am very quick to see that I am the problem and apologise without hassle. One of my good traits don't you say my lovely audience?
(I AM NOT GOING TO PUT THEY ARE LAUGHING )
My bluntness and lack of appropriate expression seems to shine through in frustration or when I'm being a stupid shit when joking around. That happened recently online and in real life on two seperate occasions. I don't remember half of the conversation in real life so it's hard to see whether I've hurt someone.
The online was sorta an innocent joke about how i was going to leave a special surprise for them on a very specific date just to be funny. It had fun and good connotations but they took it too literally and it turned out they didn't find it funny. Mind you they found something ( I won't say) funny which wasn't funny but mine was funny cause I actually thought about bringing something nice like a pack of coke cans to them instead of that "devilish surprise" which by the way, I wasn't going to do.
The real life one was I didn't realise it. It was innocently just me hating on vegemite because I revolt the smell of vegemite, like I cannot stand it. That and so many other smells. But another friend and I was joking about it and how it was something on the lines of that joking concept of "white people food". It then evolved into something worse, which I deeply apologised for.
I can't tell when people are upset with me most of the time but I know is when they start to act different around me. And to my beloved audience, help this logical old soul out and do tell me if I have upset you in any way. It is better we resolve it than being upset about it. The solution is key in life
( AUDIENCE CLAPS???!! )
At the end of the day, It's what the kids call a "skill issue" with how I deal with others. They way I act and then the reaction of how I act, sort of piles onto the reasons I don't wanna integrate everyday into our society. I'd rather stay in my house most of the time at this point because I feel I don't deserve friends. I am just a shitty person but hey, isn't everyone? We all have our flaws, we all have bad shitty things we do. As long we as people acknowledge it, we can grow as people.
And that statement leads us into our next segment. Keep watching, we will be back shortly, after the break.
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Brought to you by clown people co.
( AUDIENCE CLAPS AS CAMERA PANS ACROSS THE AUDIENCE SPRAYING SOMETHING THAT SMELLS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT ACROSS THE AUDIENCE. AUDIENCE CLAP IN TEENAGER ANGST.)
Welcome back everyone! If you just tuned in we just talked about my shittyness as a person and how I feel it affects people. You missed something worth breaking your whole body for *laughs*
(AUDIENCE LAUGH ANGSTY )
For those who just tuned in, we are having a dual rant episode today. Our sponsor Dual Argument Shampoo kindly sponsored us today. The stuff... is amazing and you should try it. That was totally not scripted. Give a round of a clause to Dual Argument Shampoo! Eat your opponents eyes!
Ah, now that sponsor is out of the way. Segment 2: My reflection on a incident that happened just a little of 7 months ago.
The context will be short on this one as I want to keep names private and the detail will be lacking due to copyright reasons. They will be referred to as P.
The event where this person and I stopped being friends was on Valentines of this year. I already had a bad feeling about being wanted there, so was this friend (we will call Bel for the sake of confusion) because Bel recently broke up with her boyfriend a week prior to the events and was originally going with him. I know that Bel was about to be uninvited because I saw screenshots of them about to being uninvited as they were no longer in a relationship and this event on Valentines was, "couples only".
So as they good friend I am, I offered to go as replacement for Bel's boyfriend. I got there without Bel so I messaged P asking where they were. My eyesight was bad as I didn't bring glasses so I had trouble seeing afar, especially in a dark place like the event we where at. I was left outside on read for 20 nearly 30 minuets. I was starting to get worried, so I cried outside in distress until Bel arrived. She came down to get me, dragged me upstairs and had a go at P for not answering my messages. They claimed I didn't message them at all on the spot. '
The event was fun and all but the vibe was off the whole time. I felt uneasy most of the time through.
Then after the event was when we walked up and down the road many times because we didn't know what to do. I remember there would be times me and Bel were sat on the park bench and the real couples walked off into the park. This set my uneasiness further.
Then came 6pm and everyone had to leave. P and the other couple carpooled in P Mother's car. Bel had left before 6 so I was left with P. I was left to wait 20 minutes all by myself again outside the closed place and it was the dodgiest part of the area too. I didn't feel safe but that's when I saw Bel walk over. She was pissed at P for leaving me at the place again.
I had enough. The only time iI spoke to them after that was the week after, reluctantly on wanting to speak to them. I had had so many times where they've done stuff to really hurt me and I've easily forgiven them. Not because I was over it it was because it would be a pain within our friend groups since everyone in the friend group were friends. The was many times I could've stopped talking to them like I'm doing now but it was all for the sake of keeping the waters calm.
It's been 7 months now. I'm not upset about Valentines. I am pissed about not getting my apology...we could've solved this problem months ago. And I feel like it's not my place to initiate talk, you audience feel like that? I've asked advice from others but it's the whole thing about that I may have done something wrong. From what I've gathered, the only thing that I could've done wrong was the relationship I had with Bel and the whole beach drama. Which by the way, those were both out of my control, and the friendship thing felt like P was jealous of how strong Bel and I's relationship was. I could feel it when we hung out as a trio, the awkwardness was at times very unbearable.
( CUED MFING CLAP TO BREAK THESE PARAGRAPHS UP )
I have no hate towards this person. I am not angry nor upset. I just didn't agree the way they treated me and others and the whole attention thingy. It was fine before but as you grow as a person, you start to see others for who they are. I chose to ignore, forgive and forget the things that made me dislike them when I was younger.
There was many other things as well that caused conflict in our friendship. I am just glad they are finally attempting to fix those issues but one issue they haven't seemed to fix is the main important one.
I didn't ever stopped talking to P because I didn't want to be friends. I just wanted my apology and them to acknowledge what they did to me and other people. And that's the hard part folks, admitting you are the problem. It's a common coping mechanism to conflict and that's totally okay. As long as we acknowledge that it is okay to be wrong, and it is okay to be the bad guy for a few seconds. There is nothing wrong with it; it makes you more human.
I used to blame others but all it ever did was make the issue worse. You lose people for no reason, you don't gain anything from running away. Heck maybe folks, I should apply that quite literally in real life when I'm running from my never ending job or maybe the reigns of this sloppy life *laughs manically like joker because a joker kinnie*
( CUED LAUGH CUS IT WASN'T FUNNY )
Maturing comes at different stages for different people. We can all learn from today's crusty rant and apply it. Well I hope not because I don't want too many intelligent people on the street having Fight Club fist fights with themselves.
( AUDIENCE LAUGH BECAUSE IF NOT CRUSTY WILL GET MAD FOR NOT LIKING THE SUBTLE FIGHT CLUB REFERENCE. IT AIN'T THAT SUBTLE CRUSTY )
I'm your host crustymeowman and I'll see you next time on crusty rants. Until next time! So long my angsty crusty teens!
OUTRO MUSIC PLAYS OF XENOGENESIS, MATCHING WITH CRUSTYMEOWMAN'S LAST WORDS AT THE BEAT DROP.
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