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aylacavebear · 9 months ago

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She Thought She was Normal

Chapter 1 - In case you missed it :)

Story Summary: Maria really thought she was normal, for most of her life. It was normal for people to have natural talent, she would tell herself the older she got. Many things came easy for her, and that was probably how their rivalry began when she was five and he was seven and she met the Winchesters. Little did either of them know that it wouldn't stay like that forever, both having a far larger destiny than they could imagine

Please don't take my work. I'll post warnings for each chapter. Will eventually be 18+!

Word Count: 3578

Warnings: Childhood rivalry, mention of deceased parent

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Chapter 2

The team-up of their fathers lasted for two months. Maria and Dean butted heads when their fathers weren't around. Dean didn't like the fact that a girl who was two years younger than him was better at anything he could do. In a way, it had helped push him at a time when he needed it. Sam adored her as she was always making him laugh at, and with her, it was always play time. John and William parted ways but agreed to stay in touch and try to give the kids time together if they ever happened to be in the same area. Maria had enjoyed it, to a point. Dean was competitive and she'd noticed that the first day they'd met. She didn't enjoy being put in a position that required her to prove a point, but she wasn't going to let him win either, it just wasn't in her, even at five.

After she and her father had driven away, he glanced at her briefly. Her mother had always been better at this than he was, “Did you enjoy being able to hang out with other kids that are hunters?” he asked her, being as soft with his tone as he could.

“It was okay, Pappa,” she answered.

He pursed his lips, debating his next words, “That's not what I'm asking.”

She looked over at him and sighed, “Dean is really competitive. I didn't like it, and… I wouldn't just let him win like you don't let me win. I have to do it on my own. Sammy was sweet though, and I enjoyed playing with him and making him laugh and smile.”

William smiled, “I'm proud of you for that, even with it being hard on you. I think it's just how John's raised Dean as to why he's that way. Who knows, maybe it will help him be able to get better,” he chuckled a little, “Might be interesting when you see him again and he might win.”

Maria scoffed at that, “Just means I'll make sure to train more so he won't beat me.”

That made her father laugh, that deep, belly laugh of amusement and adoration, “Don't forget to be a kid sometimes though. There's nothing wrong with having a rival, even with a possible friend.”

To that, she crossed her arms across her chest, “He didn't want to be my friend. He was just mean, teasing me that I didn't act like a girl, that I was a tomboy. He said that girls can't hunt because we're weaker,” she huffed, annoyed.

William chuckled, “Munchkin, that's how boys are. They tease a girl like that when they like them,” he chuckled, finding it kind of cute how his daughter was reacting, but made a note to talk to John about this.

“Well, he's mean and I don't like him and I'm not gonna let him win. I'm gonna prove girls can hunt better than boys,” she huffed, then got quiet, “You don't count though, neither does Uncle Bobby or John.”

“Girls are smarter and some hunt better than boys, so keep that in mind,” he said softly, and fought back his tears, remembering her mother, his wife. The yellow-eyed demon was a type of demon they'd never encountered before, and she had no chance, no one did.

She smiled, “Work smarter, not harder,” she told him, something her mother had said to her often.

Maria still refused to give into the pain of the loss of her mother, wanting to feel happy remembering her mother and not sad. So, she made a choice, that no matter what, she’d feel the happiness that her mother’s memories brought her. In her five-year-old mind, it made sense to her. Just because someone was gone didn’t mean that they weren’t still with you, so that was when she held onto.

For the next three years, the two of them traveled around, her father hunting supernatural creatures while she helped with research. It was something she found she was a natural at. She always seemed to be able to put the pieces together in ways her father never saw or had even thought to. Even her Uncle called and had her help with a few different cases after William had noticed her knack for it. She'd seen the Winchesters a few different times as well, still beating Dean at whatever challenge he came up with. She did notice the last couple of times, he'd actually seemed to put more thought into what he'd come up with compared to in the beginning. Back then he'd seem to come up with something on the spot, and it was usually stupidly easy.

Two years later, her father dropped her off at her Uncle's, as William and John thought they found another lead on the yellow-eyed demon and didn't want the kids anywhere near harm's way. Dean was twelve and Sam was eight now. Maria wondered what Dean would come up with this time.

When the two pulled up to her Uncle's, she grabbed both her bags out of the truck, as well as flung her backpack over her shoulder. Bobby met them at the door, happy to have her stay for more than just a couple of days this time. He'd set up the room for her, so that was where she took her things.

“You got a time frame?” Bobby asked William.

“No, sadly, I don't. Here's her schedule. Her gun, ammo, and knives are in her duffle. She's got shooting practice and three different knife routines,” William explained.

“Damn, Will, she's only ten,” Bobby exclaimed.

“Bobby, we've had this talk already. She needs this, okay,” William told him just as she rejoined them in the living room.

Maria went over and gave her Uncle a hug, “Are we gonna get to cook again?” she asked him, curiously.

“Of course munchkin, you gotta eat,” he chuckled.

That made her happy, causing a smile to match. She excused herself to settle in, knowing her stay would be at least two weeks long, but it could last for a couple of months. Maria was looking forward to reading more of her Uncle's books. He had so many that she could never find in Libraries, no matter what town she and her father had been in. She had a thirst for knowledge that never seemed to be satiated, no matter what books her father had given her, and the amount she retained, even after years of having read it, was almost photogenic.

Maria unpacked her clothes into the dresser, keeping things neat before taking her toiletries to the bathroom down the hall. Once her bag was empty, she tossed it into the laundry bin Bobby had gotten for her during her first stay when she was five.

“Five years, momma…” she whispered to herself as she opened her weapons bag.

The gun her father had given her was placed under her pillow with the silver knife she usually kept on her. While she was at her Uncle's, she'd decided to keep her boot knife on her as a ‘just in case’. Maria looked at the other weapons in her bag; a machete, a small hatchett, a shotgun with plenty of salt rounds, a bottle of holy water, and her set of throwing knives. She decided to leave those in the bag and slid it under her bed, near the head of it. She placed her school books neatly on the desk that her Uncle had added a few years ago when she spent two weeks with him. It was at that moment she heard the familiar purr of John's Impala pull up in the driveway. Ever since she'd first met them, she had adopted Sammy as her little brother, which had only partially annoyed Dean. She smirked, thinking about what challenge Dean would come up with this time. She pulled on her flannel before heading back out to the living room.

Maria excitedly ran outside, “Little brother!” she exclaimed, as she opened the kitchen door and ran over to Sammy, who was still two inches shorter than she was.

“Sis!” he exclaimed as she practically picked him up in a hug.

Dean just rolled his eyes, discreetly taking note of how she had changed since the last time he'd seen her, and John just chuckled at all three of them.

“So, ready for the challenge?” Dean asked her, somewhat smugly.

She smirked as she looked over at him, “Ready to watch you lose again.”

“You two can do that another time,” John told them, doing his best not to chuckle, “We're gonna be heading out before dinner, so let's enjoy the visit.”

“Yes, Sir,” she replied, respectfully as the four of them went inside.

Maria hugged John after they made it into the house, and the boys shook William and Bobby's hands. She headed back into the kitchen and pulled out the hamburger patties and the package of bacon from the freezer to defrost. She noticed Dean just watching her but she pretended that she hadn't. She saw Dean as an annoying rival that she refused to let win. Little did she know that one day, all that would change with what was ahead for all of them.

John and William only stayed for an hour, catching Bobby up on the lead they had and that it hopefully would take little time to investigate. Maria hugged her father, shook John's hand, and wished them luck on the hunt. She watched them drive away in the Impala, leaving the truck behind since they would be working together for a while. She knew she'd miss her dad, but she was going to enjoy the time at her Uncle's and getting to hang out with Sammy. She was really looking forward to watching Dean lose another challenge of his choosing.

Maria didn’t get the opportunity to cook very often while she and her father were on the road. It was very rare for her father to get a motel room with a kitchen. She set up the pans she'd need for burgers before getting the frozen fries in the oven on a greased cookie sheet. She also made sure to season them, something she'd been wanting to try since she'd had them at one of the diners. She smirked when she realized that again, Dean was watching her.

Dean, being twelve, girls were an enigma and annoying at the same time. Maria was both of those on the furthest end. He'd never met any girl like her before. She was confident on a level he'd never seen, nor had even within himself. Due to her consistently beating him at every challenge he'd come up with over the years, had pushed him to hone his skills and learn more. William had informed John of their interactions five years ago, to which John sat Dean down and explained she was to be respected and not flirted with. She was also the only ten-year-old girl he knew who could cook with the confidence she showed.

“Do you let her do that all the time?” Dean asked Bobby as Sammy made his way into the kitchen.

“Yup. She's good at it and enjoys it, why wouldn't I?” Bobby replied, paying attention to how Dean was watching her.

“What are you cooking sis?” Sammy asked.

“Bacon burgers and seasoned fries. You hungry little brother?” she replied softly, a smile to match.

“I am now,” he laughed.

“Good. I think you'll like it,” she smiled.

Dean was almost mesmerized by her, and how she was with his little brother, who adored her. He had to act cool though, it's what boys his age did.

Maria talked to Sammy while she cooked the burgers and bacon, explaining each step to him and why she did it the way she did. She had Sammy's full attention, as his stomach had begun grumbling the closer it got to being done.

“Hey, Uncle Bobby, can you get one of those dinner bells, so I can ring it when I cook?” she asked as she pulled the fries out of the oven.

He chuckled a little, “We'll see. Dean, go set the table,” he replied, leaning back in his chair to watch them.

He'd let Maria do her own thing as she was one of the most mature girls he'd ever interacted with no matter what age she was. He wasn't about to tell her she wasn't allowed to cook, not with as good a cook as she'd become. Bobby also noticed the grumble Dean attempted to hide as he went into the kitchen to do what he'd been told. Bobby shook his head a bit, quickly realizing the difference between Dean and Maria. Sammy even pitched in, getting the ketchup, mayonnaise, and mustard out of the fridge and put them on the table.

Maria put the cheese on the burgers, turned off the burner, and covered the pan before she put the bacon on a plate that had a paper towel laid out on it to catch the grease. She carefully put the seasoned fries in a big bowl and almost jumped when Dean grabbed it to put it on the table.

“Smells amazing,” Bobby told her as he sat down at the table, knowing she liked to do things her way when it came to food since she'd gotten a little older.

“Thanks. I tried something new with the fries this time. I had em’ like this in a diner once and wanted to try to make em’. Please be honest, on how they taste,” she replied while she put the burgers on a plate, and then brought them to the table.

Sammy grabbed the plate of bacon before Dean could, sticking his tongue out at his older brother, which made Maria stifle a giggle. Dean grabbed the buns before he sat down as far away from her as possible, which put him next to Bobby but across from his brother. Things were quiet until they bit into the burgers.

“You've become quite the cook,” Bobby told her, surprised at how the burger had come out, now curious about the fries.

“Thanks, Uncle Bobby, I don't get to do it as often as I want to though,” she answered before eating one of the fries.

She was her worst critic, mentally making notes on how to change the amount of seasonings she'd used, also deciding it needed a dash of chili powder. She barely noticed Sammy scarfing the fries. Dean even liked them, but he wasn't about to say that.

“The fries are pretty good too, but it's like they're missing something,” Bobby told her, honestly.

“Yeah, they needed a dash of chili powder and the spices aren't quite right. I'll have to try again while I'm here,’ she replied looking up at him.

“But, they taste fine, sis,” Sammy argued.

She looked over at him and smiled, “Thanks, little brother. You like everything I cook.”

“Cause you make yummy food,” he told her.

Maria only glanced at Dean briefly, managing to see a small amount of enjoyment in his expression before he quickly got a plain look. She rolled her eyes and went back to her dinner. Why did boys have to be so immature, she thought to herself. What she didn't understand was that boys, especially hunters, needed to be a certain way. The biggest was to keep their emotions out of their expression, and whether she liked it or not, she was helping Dean learn how to be a better hunter.

“I'll clean up tonight, okay munchkin,” Bobby told her, proud of her in ways he couldn't express, partly because he didn't know how.

She was a little surprised, but smiled over at him, “Thank you, Uncle Bobby. I'm glad you liked dinner.”

Maria went to the bathroom, brushed her teeth, then her hair, and headed to her room where she sat down at her desk to do some reading. She knew her Uncle wouldn't quiz her on it, as it wasn't part of her daily schedule. It wasn't long before Ssmmy made his way into her room and looked over her shoulder.

“What are you reading?” he asked curiously.

“A book about witches,” she replied as she flipped to the next page.

“How come?” he asked, not understanding why she'd be doing that of her own choice.

This time she looked over at him, still seeing that three-year-old boy she'd met five years ago, which made a soft smile cross her lips, “Well little brother, I'm going to be a hunter and I want to know everything I can so I am prepared and can kill what needs killing, without getting hurt,” she explained.

Sammy thought about what she said for a minute. He too, loved learning but hadn't considered doing it like she was, “Makes sense I guess, but I like reading other stuff.”

What she didn't realize was that even now, Sammy was having his own internal battle. On one hand, he wanted to be a hunter like his brother, and father, and even like her, but on the other, he didn't want to. Dean had been listening from the hallway, unseen by either of them, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest, annoyed.

Dean moved so that he was in her doorway, “Challenge tomorrow, after breakfast.”

She smirked when she looked over at him, “What is it this time?”

“Knife throwing,” he said, confidently.

“You brought the knives or am I using mine?” she asked.

“I brought mine,” he said before he walked away, feeling as though he would finally win one of these.

Sammy had been watching his brother, but turned back to her, “How come you two do those?” he asked her, not understanding the point of it.

“Pretty sure Dean doesn't like losing, let alone to a girl younger than him,” she chuckled.

“Are you gonna win again?” he asked her.

“Of course,” she replied, as she got up and pulled her bag out from under her bed. Maria sifted through it and pulled out her throwing knives, showing Sammy, “I've been practicing,” she winked before putting them away.

Sammy giggled just as Bobby showed up in her doorway, “Time to clean up for bed,” he told Sammy, knowing Maria had already done her stuff.

“Okay Bobby,” Sammy replied, heading out of her room.

Bobby watched him leave before he looked back over at her, noticing she had sat back at her desk, “Dean told me about the challenge he came up with. Just make sure it's out in the scrapyard and not in the driveway,” he told her.

“Of course, Uncle Bobby,” she answered looking over at him, “You think he'll ever get tired of losing?”

Bobby sighed, “Probably not,” he replied, then chuckled, “Give him a run for his money, 'cause I'm bettin' on you.”

That made her smile, “Always Uncle Bobby. I'm not gonna let him win. He's gotta earn it,” she winked, “Not like a monster will let him kill 'em, same principle.”

“That's my girl,” he smiled before he left to check on the boys.

Once her Uncle left, she closed her door and changed into her pajamas, still thinking about what book she'd snag out of her Uncle's collection to read that night. He had so many options and they were all interesting. Maria wasn't even concerned about the challenge with Dean the following day, in fact, she was looking forward to it.

Maria waited till her Uncle wasn't in the living room, roughly an hour later, before she crept out there and grabbed one of his books as quickly as she could. She closed her door and got comfortable on her bed, gently running her hand over the raised letters of the book, Angels: Myth VS Facts. She knew that she couldn't believe everything she read. No one ever seemed to have all the truth of anything in just one book, hence why she loved her Uncle's collection. She read for an hour, finding the book fascinating before she heard a knock on her door, quickly shoving the book under her pillow behind her.

“Come in,” she hollered.

It was her Uncle and Sammy, “He just wanted to say good night,” Bobby told her.

She smiled and climbed off her bed as Sammy met her in the middle of her room, “Night sis. Don't let me sleep through the challenge please. I wanna watch,” he told her, grinning.

“Night little brother, and I promise, I'll wake you up,” she replied before she hugged him.

Bobby watched from her doorway, smiling at the two of them, grateful they had each other. Most kids of hunters didn't ever get to interact with other kids in the same line of work, just getting jostled from school to school, always being the new kid, and it never lasted long.

“Night munchkin, lookin’ forward to Dean's sour face tomorrow,” he chuckled.

“Same, and goodnight Uncle Bobby,” she replied.

She glanced at her clock after her Uncle left. Eight, she thought to herself before calculating how long she could read before she had to sleep. Maria set her alarm for five, and then read the book for another hour before she reached the chapter on Nephilim.

It was eleven before she realized it, closing the book and sliding it under her pillow before going to bed.

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Chapter 3

Tag List

@deans-spinster-witch

Link to the master list for this story.

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lovelyd0gg · 3 months ago

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"My dear, we will find each other." Pt. 2

Summary: Eugene and you parted ways because you both had to move to your families in different states. You both lived far away and were in a long-distance relationship. You both called at times and texted, but, one day, on your birthday, you are greeted with a very happy surprise.

Warnings: FLUFFY, tiny bit angst.

After the war, you and Eugene went to different states and officially were in a long distance relationship. You missed him a lot and he was hoping that one day he could see you again. You guys have called sometimes but not a lot because he was busy. You were pretty sad that he wasn't there and he was missing you like hell. It wasn't enough to just hear your voice and see your face through a little screen. He wanted to see you to the fullest. And the worst part? How was he gonna be there for your birthday?! It was just around the corner! He had to think of something soon!

Meanwhile, you are with your friends outside, you all are chatting and just hanging out, having a good time. When suddenly you get a notification from Eugene. It said, "Cher, you forgot to call me yesterday." Your eyes widened and then you realized you indeed didn't call him yesterday. Which was really bad because he was probably missing you a lot and was craving to see you. You felt is guilty and told your friends that you had to go home. As soon as you got home, you immediately called him. Hoping he'd pick up the phone. And fortunately, he did. You kept apologizing and telling him that you completely forgot, he just chuckled and said it was okay. But he didn't want to only see you for the call. He asked, "What do you think would be a good birthday gift? It's almost your birthday, might as well ask ya what ya want." You thought for a little and you told him what you wanted. Flowers, your favorite chocolates, maybe even a little stuffed bear, all that jazz. You didn't really ask for a lot. But then you said, "But the best gift would be having you here.." He looked down, he knew that it probably wasn't possible... Wait.. But it's probably, not 100% impossible... He nodded and said. "We both know it's probably not possible, mon amour. But, I'll see what I can do with the other gifts, alright?" You nodded. You knew it wasn't really possible, but you hoped. You wondered when would be the next time you'd see him..

Tomorrow is your birthday. You're very excited! But also kinda sad that some of your friends and family members weren't gonna be there to celebrate it with you, and Eugene wouldn't be there too.. It was definitely gonna be a boring and sad birthday. But you kept thinking positively. You were more just on your phone today and maybe reading a book at times, then you got a call from Eugene. You picked up. "Hey cher, just letting you know, the presents will be sent in a box and delivered to you. I'm sorry I can't make it, mon amour. Next year. I love you." You frowned a little, you really wished he would be here for your birthday, oh well. There's always next year. The rest of the day, you just relaxed and talked with some of your friends. Some of them would come to your birthday and a couple of your family members too would come, you were planning the time when they would come to your place, and more. At least you could see them.

The day of your birthday was here! You got dressed and you agreed with the people who would come, would come at 3.00PM. You were patiently waiting for your friends and family members to arrive. Once everyone did, your mom brought you the cake and some other relatives came with the presents, and soon enough your friends came. When you were chatting with your friends and family, your mom started to talk. "Hey, there's a really big gift that's going to arrive soon, but it's a surprise! So one of your friends can cover your eyes until the gift comes!" You tilted your head, a big gift? Why would you need to have your eyes covered if it's wrapped, right? Well, maybe it was different. A couple minutes later, your friend covers your eyes with her hands and puts you to sit down on the couch. You heard some giggling in the background and the outside door opening, maybe the gift was being transported inside? Then you felt arms around your neck, but hands still covering your eyes. Suddenly, you heard a soft and gentle southern accent, "Guess who?" Your friend removed her hands off your eyes and you turned around. Eugene behind you, with a smile. "Bonjour, mon amour." You felt the need to cry, luckily you didn't. You hugged him tight and you felt so happy to see him. "Eugene! But.. How did you get here?" You asked with a soft voice. "I never said it was impossible to come here." You smiled and kissed him gently, he returned the kiss back. The rest of the day you celebrated your birthday with the ones you cared, sadly, the day came to an end and you said your goodbyes to your family and your friends. You were left alone with Eugene. You turned around to look at him, he looked.. Sad and guilty. "I got some bad news for ya, darlin'.." You tilted your head and wondered what he was talking about. "I... Gotta go back to Louisiana.. I have to stay there.." Your eyes widened and tears welled in your eyes. He immediately pulled you into a tight hug. "I'm so sorry love.. I know.. It's hard." You started to cry in his arms, him coming back to you just for a day?! What is this?! "But, you can't.. You landed hours ago.. You can't!" You protested, you were irritated at the fact he had to go. "I'll see you again baby, I promise." You shaked your head, this wasn't acceptable in your head. "Why can't you stay just for a couple more days..?" He shaked his head. "I can't, I got work too, you know that." Eventually, you gave up. There was no point in arguing back. You looked up at him. "I love you.. Don't forget about me." He looked down at you and gave you a tender kiss on your forehead. "Only a dumbass would forget a woman like you." You smiled. "Safe travels.. Text me as soon as you land or I'll strangle you from here.." You joked, trying to lighten the mood. "Yeah? Well next time, don't forget to call me. Otherwise I'll strangle you from there." You both laughed a little. Saying your goodbyes, he left. It was gonna be a while till you'll see him again.

#eugene roe x reader #eugene roe #My dear #pt. 2 #bob

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staytinyville · 1 year ago

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Jongho

PLEASE REFER TO MASTERLIST TO GET FULL TAROT READING EXPERIENCE

↣ Summary: There was a time when you really wanted to become an Idol. You practiced so hard to reach that dream but when your family told you that it would be better if you studied law you found yourself at a standstill wondering if it was worth reaching your dream. While going to an audition at KQ with your friend you meet someone who told you you should always follow what you want.

↣ Characters/Pairing: Choi Jongho x gn!reader

↣ Genre: fluff

↣ AU/Trope info: idol!au, predebut!au,

↣ Word Count: 664

↣ Warnings: none

↣ A/N: I would’ve loved to do a smut for Jongho because we need more but the card said no. My thoughts were like. Nah, we ain't gonna do that. But for other writers send your Jongho imagines my way man.

DEATH

Endings, Changing, Transformation, Transition

While this card is the most understood of them all, it can signify the end of something but rest assured it's talking about a stage in your life you are ready to give up and move forward from. You should embrace the future that the universe has in store for you.

The card is mostly about things ending and becoming new. Much like a butterfly, you are transforming yourself into something better. Death is something that happens everywhere-not just when signifying the end of a life.

Finally, death comes when you need to let go of unhealthy attachments that might be holding you back. Whether toxic or unneeded. You can't avoid the ending for certain things, especially not when they are not needed in your life.

XIII DEATH

“You sure you don't want to audition?” Your friend asked you as you both stood out in the lobby of KQ.

You looked down at their attire, the number sheet hanging from their chest making something in you clench in sadness.

“I'm sure. I'll wait out here for you.” You told them, giving them a reassuring smile.

“Okay.” They told you skeptically.

“Hwaiting!” You raised your hands in fists, trying to show that you were there to support your friend the best you could.

“Hwaiting!” They repeated back, moving along the line to where they were holding some dancing auditions.

You looked around the lobby for a moment, before finding an empty chair and taking a seat to rest. You knew it was going to be a long while before your friend would come back out. There were a few people waiting out with you seeing as they were going in groups. A few boys were talking with each other and some others were practicing their dance moves. You felt someone come to sit down next to you, causing you to turn your head to face them.

“Are you auditioning too?” He asked you, trying to make small talk.

“Oh no.” You gave a kind smile. “I'm just here for moral support. Are you?”

“Yeah.” He grinned. “I'm very excited about it.”

“Sounds great!” You exclaimed, getting happy for him. “It must be something you love doing.”

“Of course it is.” He turned to you, his arms crossed.

“What about you? What do you like?”

You smiled bashfully at having his attention. He looked so adorable but that was probably due to his age. He sounded like he was much more mature than he let on as well.

“I enjoy music a lot as well.” You told him honestly. “But I have other things I'm going to study.” You sighed, looking down at your shoes.

“Do you like doing them? Do you enjoy studying what you are? If you don't, why study it?” He shrugged, turning back around.

“It's a bit more complicated than that.” You sighed.

It wasn’t that you didn’t want to study law–there was a lot of things that really did call to your attention. But nothing made you happy like music had. You didn’t know if you were cut out to be an idol but you would be more than happy to settle for a producer.

However your parents really tried to tell you that it wasn’t a guaranteed career. You knew they were right seeing as a lot of idols tended to not renew their contracts, but that was for a later time. You still had a bunch of years before you came across the ending. You didn’t want to give up on chasing your dreams. But there were just so many people telling you that other options were best.

“Is it really?” Jongho told you. “You should follow your dream especially if you have the opportunity right in front of your face.” He turned to you, leaning down to get you to look at him.

“Don't let yourself be the reason you never find happiness. Move forward with your choices and keep at it. That's how I got here and it's how I'm going to get there.”

You knew there was a point in your life you were going to have to give up and change for the better. Find new things that would take you to better places rather than holding you back in the same spot. You need to give up with things that weren’t in your mind from the beginning and start thinking about yourself.

“You're inspiring.” You giggled at him.

“Gotta practice to make sure the fans love me.” He grinned.

“I'm sure they will either way.” You told him, knocking your knee with his.

“I’m Jongho.” He stuck his hand out.

“(Y/N).” You gripped his hand tightly, giving it a shake. “I hope to get the chance to work with you then.”

Tags : @cultofdionysusnet , @wonderlandnet , @pirateeznet , @k-vanity

#cultofdionysusnet #wonderlandnet #kvanity #pirateeznet #ateez x reader #ateez fic #ateez imagines #ateez #ateez fanfic #jongho #jongho x you #jongho x reader #jongho x y/n #jongho ateez #jongho fluff #jongho imagines #tarot

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carchaseonacarchase · 2 months ago

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𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚜𝚎 & 𝙲𝚊𝚛𝚖𝚎𝚗 𝙸𝚗𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝙿𝚕𝚊𝚢𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝. 🤎

╰┈➤ this is a list of songs that i think fit very well with carmen and chase, the selection of songs is pretty personal cause it's based on my own music tastes, i appreciate you to recommend me songs and other suggestions to expand it :3 this playlist is full of 60's/90's songs to keep it classic but there's also pop/rock/indie songs on there. enjoy ;)

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

⚘ the world we knew (over and over) frank sinatra ❛❛ and the sun and the moon seemed to be ours, each road that we took turned into gold. but the dream was too much for you to hold ❞

⚘ under attack abba ❛❛ under attack, i'm taking cover, he's on my track, my chasing lover ❞

⚘ atomic blondie ❛❛ make me tonight, tonight make it right ❞

⚘ stop the world cause' i wanna get off with you arctic monkeys ❛❛ when you want to escape, say the word. well i know that getting you alone isn't easy to do. get the sense that you're on the move, and you'll probably be leaving soon ❞

⚘ i need a disguise belinda carlisle ❛❛ i need a disguise, to hide my love, i need a disguise, you've seen too much ❞

⚘ waterloo abba ❛❛ and how could i ever refuse? i feel like i win when i lose. couldn't escape if i wanted to, waterloo, knowing my fate is to be with you ❞

⚘ the louvre lorde ❛❛ our days and nights are perfumed with obsession. but we're the greatest, they'll hang us in the louvre down the back, but who cares - still the louvre ❞

⚘ it's no good depeche mode ❛❛ i'm gonna take my time, i have all the time in the world to make you mine, it is written in the stars above ❞

⚘ you know that i'm not good amy winehouse ❛❛ i cheated myself. like i knew i would. i told you i was trouble, you know that i'm no good❞

⚘ some unholy war amy winehouse ❛❛ he can't lose with me in tow, i refuse to let him go, at his side and drunk on pride, we wait for the blow ❞

⚘ useless depeche mode ❛❛ all your stupid ideals, you've got your head in the clouds, you should see how it feels, with your feet on the ground ❞

⚘ rebel yell billy idol ❛❛ what set you free and brought you to me, babe? what set you free? i need you here by me ❞

⚘ diet mountain dew lana del rey ❛❛ you're no good for me, baby, you're no good for me, you're no good for me, but, baby, i want you, i want you ❞

⚘ tainted love soft cell ❛❛ once i ran to you, now i'll run from you. the love we share seems to go nowhere ❞

⚘ love is a battlefield pat benatar ❛❛ but i'm trapped by your love, and i'm chained to your side. both of us knowing, love is a battlefield ❞

⚘ out of touch hall & oates ❛❛ the shades all around aren't the colors we used to see, broken ice still melts in the sun, and ties that are broken can often be one again, we're soul alone, and soul really matters to me ❞

⚘ he can only hold her amy winehouse ❛❛ now, how can he have her heart, when it got stole? so he tries to pacify her 'cause what's inside her never dies ❞

⚘ can't take my eyes of you the four seasons ❛❛ now that i've found you, stay, and let me love you, baby, let me love you ❞

⚘ careless whisper george michael ❛❛ as the music dies, something in your eyes, calls to mind a silver screen, and all its sad goodbyes ❞

⚘ les feuilles mortes duo gadjo and their hot friends ❛❛ oh! je voudrais tant que tu te souviennes, des jours heureux où nous étions amis, en ce temps-là, la vie était plus belle, et le soleil plus brûlant qu'aujourd'hui ❞

⚘ summer wine nancy sinatra ❛❛ she took my silver spurs a dollar and a dime, and left me cravin' for more summer wine❞

⚘ imagination foster the people ❛❛ we can't change the things we can't control, it's summer somewhere, do you shouldn't be so cold. if you want me to stay, don't keep me waiting for it ❞

⚘ why must we wait until tonight? tina turner ❛❛ take your lips and make them mine, tell me why, why must we wait until tonight, why when i've waited all my life ❞

⚘ the lady in red chris de burgh ❛❛ and when you turned to me and smiled, it took my breath away. it's just you and me, it's where i wanna be ❞

⚘ white teeth teens lorde ❛❛ i know you love it when the hairpins start to drop, i like your reckoning, but we got our methods ❞

⚘ heroes david bowie ❛❛ though nothing, nothing will keep us together, we can beat them, forever and ever. we can be us, just for one day ❞

⚘ knowing me, knowing you abba ❛❛ memories, good days, bad days, they'll be with me always. breaking up is never easy i know, but i have to go, knowing me, knowing you it's the best i can do ❞

⚘ suck it and see arctic monkeys ❛❛ how i often wonder where you are, you have got that face that just says 'baby, i was made to break your heart' ❞

⚘ as the world falls down david bowie ❛❛ as the pain sweeps through, makes no sense for you, every thrill has gone, wasn't too much fun at all. but i'll be there for you as the world falls down ❞

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

#carchase #carmen+x+chase #chase devineaux #carmen sandiego #90s #carmeneaux #carmenaux #i don't have spotify so if someone wants to create the playlist on there feel free to do it ;D #this was fun #i love them sm 🤎#playlist 🍒🥞#carchase on a carchase :0

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bloodanddiscoballs · 2 years ago

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Alright I said I was gonna make a sappy post for my 30th birthday so here it goes!:

I never thought I would live to see 30. I know that many people say that, and I'm sure that sentiment isn't unique on here. Here's the thing; I'm disabled. I have almost died due to my health 3 times since 2011 and indeed did once before being brought back. My immune system is nonexistent, and my chronic pain has me at currently 6 reconstructive back surgeries and round the clock pain medication.

When I was 17 years old, I became a victim of medical malpractice and had my entire life changed in an instant. Didn't get to go off to college, didn't get to work normally, didn't get to move out - didn't, didn't, didn't. For years, I was told that I would heal. That I would be fine. I was young! Young people don't get sick. I'll bounce back. Just be patient. But I didn't get better, I got worse. And every year older was another year into my 20s where I wasn't able to do "the normal stuff." I never finished college, but I did get some classes done. I would work for a few months before needing to quit. I got married and then divorced. All "failures" due to my health.

At 27, I went to see my therapist and sat down and told her that I couldn't see into my future. I remember telling her, "Every day is hell. I can't do this for another 10 years. I've barely made it through this last 10. I don't even know if I can do it for another 3." I was at the end of my rope, convinced that I wouldn't make it. My back was crumbling underneath me again, and insurance was fighting me tooth and nail to be approved for another surgery. I was bedridden. I was on the highest medication load I've taken, and it wasn't even touching my pain. I wasn't connected to anything - not my art, not friends, not the world around me. I was looking very seriously at my options of what I thought was either suffering or dying.

So, she suggested a mindfulness program. It was a 6-week course at UCSD (University of California San Diego) that taught you how to. essentially, live in the moment. At first, I thought it was honestly the stupidest thing I'd ever heard. I'll admit that I was sour on it, but I said I would try it and I paid for the class so I did it. I sat through the meditations, wrote on the topics they gave, went through the exercises they instructed, and did the full day retreat. And at the end of those 6 weeks, I was alive again. I learned to savor every bite of my food. I learned how to pay attention to the sun on my skin. I learned to enjoy how it felt to have my air move in and out of my lungs. I learned how to look in the mirror and love what I saw and dress myself in what made me happy (this is when I started with the disco clothes). The warm feel of skin, the taste of my favorite soda, the beautiful way my cat purrs, the glorious smell of rain, the lovely way dust looks illuminated by the sun - I learned how to Live.

My life is still hard. My pain has not improved. I did get that surgery, so now my back is thankfully more stable than it's ever been. I know that I probably won't live a very long time compared to most, but none of that makes me sad anymore, not really. I have my bad days, and I have my good days, and no matter what, I live in the moment. I feel my emotions and let them have their space within me before letting them flow. And after over a decade of not touching my art because I felt like it was robbed from me, I paint now. I paint for myself, and I paint for others, and by God, I enjoy every second of it. I feed the little barn cats out in the back of where I live now, and I love them. I enjoy the sound of the wind through the oak trees, and I listen to my music, and I take pictures of the bugs. I watch the clouds race by when it's about to storm, and I talk to the flowers that grow outside my fence. I love my bed for holding me on my bad days and love that I have pretty artwork from friends hanging on my walls to comfort me when I can't leave my room. I dress up in my fun disco stuff whenever I can, and on the days I can't, I enjoy my soft, comfy pj's. I talk to my friends online every day and apologize for the days I can't when my pain makes it too hard to think. I play fun video games and watch good movies and enjoy fun podcasts. I Live.

Today, I am 30 years old. I have lived through what should have killed me many times over. And I am so, so happy I am here. And for however long I have, I will continue to live in the moment, enjoying the days and moments I can and allowing the bad to simply be bad. I plan for tomorrow because that is all I can plan for.

I live, and that is enough.

#not sure how to tag this #hope i guess #also you can reblog this of you want #i dont mind

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estbela · 7 months ago

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ur my hero fr…. can u maybe tell me more about serbro + bul’s dynamic 🥺

🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

Noooo, you are my hero!!!!!

OFC!!!!

(Tho this post is kind of a mess sorry)

You see, Ro & Bul are very good friends, and so are Serb & Ro, but Bul & Serb have had...rather tumultous relations over the years, sometimes being friends & allies, sometimes rivals, sometimes even enemies(also had some wars in the middle ages and probably modern era too I think), and they probably met when they were kinda young children, which in nationverse would be the (early) Middle Ages.

Anyway RoBul date for some time(like. Hundreds of years), then break up, for a bunch of reasons, one of the reasons for this being Serbia in a way?(well they argued bcs of him sometimes). Its way more complicated than that tho

Tbh sometimes Bul was basically the third wheel in his own relationship as Serb & Ro got closer over the years and his relationship with Ro got more strained.

Anyway tho I'm gonna talk less about history and more about their general dynamic! (Mostly cause I dont feel like constantly checking every historical fact i say atm)

Imagine. That couple that is so annnoyingly affectionate and also really chaotic (they might have commited several felonies together) and the most depressed pathetic guy with the soul of an old man who complains all the time yet keeps hanging out with them.

And the guy is kind of their ex too!

That is them!!

Even if he complains at every turn they keep Bul with them cause he has that pathetic whimsy and can be just as chaotic as them.

And Bul keeps hanging out with them cause next to Serb & Ro he appears Normal. And cuz he still loves Ro and might like Serb too

cue him being kinda sad and just,,,,,,thinking about the fact the Ro has moved on while he has trouble doing so right as idk. Serbro is doing fun couple stuff (although what they consider fun couple stuff might involve setting someone's house on fire)

Tbh Ro doesn't like the fact that Serb & Bul don't always get along but he knows he can't like. Force them.

An in a perfect world he'd never have to choose between them. In the past, thought, he would have chosen Bul, bcs of how close they were and how much they shared.

But as time went on, he grew unsure of his relationship with Bul and in the end, he sort of choose Serb, or at least, that's how it felt for Bul.

So there's that too.

There are probably more things I could say about them but my brain isn't cooperating at the moment 😔😔😔

Anyway 10/10 dynamic I think they could be so fun but I honestly don't think about them a lot like this kfjddjdkd (in most of my stories all 3 of them are in some weird dysfunctional polycule or robul is officially dating but both of them have some thing going on with Serb more or less lmao) but just serbro dating and Bul also being there is so interesting to think about thank you lili for asking me this!!!!

#just talking recreationally #Asks #Hetalia #Serbro #Serbia #Romania #Bulgaria #Aph #Hws

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cherphadetseuk · 1 year ago

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I'm doing a rewatch of the first episode of Only Friends (for giffing purposes) and now after having seen 7 episodes of this show it's just such a clear sign how bad this friend group is for Ray. I'm not saying they're bad friends but they're not very observant and in general just very judgy. Like in that game night scene at Yo's club they did that drinking game with the shots. They drink a lot. I know they're young and live life but sometimes I feel like the drinking is way too much. For all of them. But knowing Ray's past I feel like the friends should be more observant and supportive. I mean, I know not everyone knows everything about everyone's past. I understand that most of them don't know Ray's past. But Mew does, or at least a part of it. As we know in later episodes. So we know Ray has a drinking problem but yet here they are drinking all the time and nobody even thinks about maybe taking it down a notch. Ray wants more rounds and everyone just calls him a burden when he's drunk. Say he's just gonna throw up again. Even Mew out of everyone. I know you can't just stop drinking and I know probably even if they tell Ray to stop drinking or just all of them to stop drinking, Ray might just yell at them and drinks anyway but at least that means they were observant enough to try and support Ray. To know the problems and try to help. But nobody lifts a finger. They just insult him. Sand (I know I'm biased but objectively seen it's true) comes in later as an outsider who knows literally nothing about Ray and his past and yet here he can read the signs and sees the problems or at least that there must be some sort of problems and he tries to be supportive and helpful. Ray has money and he's not afraid to use it and he talks about it all the time and in all honesty I wouldn't be surprised if people hang around him for that reason and that reason only. I know Mew is his friend, his emergency contact and the one that saved him that one time but other than that none of them actually show true emotional and supportive friendship. They more seem like friends from school who just hang out because they work together on a project. I don't know. I just have a lot of thoughts and I'm trying to see behind the characters. I know most of them are red flags and I don't say they aren't but there are always reasons behind that and from a psychological point of view Ray's support system is terrible. There's literally none. Until Sand. And I feel like it's hard for Ray to see that because it's unknown to him. Sand IS in fact the only one so far who showed actual support that would be good for Ray and his problems. He needs help. Professional help at that but he also needs friends who stand behind him through that help and support him and none of those friends (except Sand) would fall into that category which is sad. Sad for Ray because he has no actual true friends. I'm not here supporting his behaviour towards Sand or anyone for that matter but I can tell when it's defence mechanism.

#dani talks #i have so many only friends thoughts #i just wanna talk #you can ignore this or you can interact #i'd love to talk #only friends #ofts #only friends the series #sandray #ray pakorn

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alicedrawslesmis · 7 months ago

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I hope my presence here hasn't been just me complaining, cause I haven't dedicated myself to art in a while lol I am Burned Out... I don't like being a negative presence

in the Positivistic sense not in the new age sense? you know? not pretending to be happy when things are bad, I want my presence to be pulsating with life even if I'm sad or angry or numb. I try not to fall into negation. Most millennial humor I grew up with is this kinda ironic 'haha I'm so depressed 🤪' thing I just don't vibe with at all. I like feeling all my feelings. If I'm depressed and numb to it all then good, lets explore that. If I'm lost and aimless then good, let's be aimless and see where this can lead me to. I want to feel the full breadth of human experience and not live life negating it. I want to reflect on what I'm doing I want to create new things! Work with the world and not despite it

but unfortunately cause I'm totally lost at sea rn this means my posts are lacking and so the internet "persona" ends up being only someone who complains. That's not where I'm at. I don't even know if this makes sense to other people who can't see my brain, am I even making sense. Anyway

I am experimenting with a lot of things art-wise to get my groove on. I've bean reading a bunch. I've been lifting weights which is turns out is super fun and I should've started ages ago. Like I didn't believe the gym could be fun, I thought people were just faking it but it turns out like. It's just self expression like any other activity. And I love to see number go up. And I love making that face you do when you're lifting heavy weights you know the one? And grunting. It's very freeing to just be able to do that. Like all my life I've been bogged down by thinking the gym is for assholes and that I should try to do the Normal Sports that I honestly fucking hate. I hate ball sports. I don't understand swimming as a sport you're trapped doing laps in that freaking pool it's the most boring sport of all time. Sure I liked thinking about nothing and swimming but laps in a pool?? Devil invention. Running is kinda the same although you can run interesting places and aren't trapped in a blue rectangle. Just do the sport you actually want to do. Go to a fight club idk. Learn to kickbox. Punch some stuff. Do push ups, I love doing push ups.

What else? I've been walking my dog for 2hours every day late in the afternoon and getting to hang with his friends at the dog park. He isn't very friendly but he's also not aggressive so it's mostly chill. He's made a friend named Draco Malfoy (she made sure to tell me it was her kid daughter's idea) and everyone calls my dog Sirius Black cause he's got black fur and is, and this is the technical term, giant. Kind of annoying that Harry Potter is still the main thing people go to to describe him. Except for one security guard who I thought was gonna say he looks like Sirius but then said he looks like Sam from Twilight. This was an awesome day

I've been trying to sew and mend my clothes. I replaced the buckle in my bag cause it was broken and I feel kind of amazing about it.

I've been writing some stuff. All unfinished yet. I want to see if I can finish the short story I've been trying to work on besides the Les Mis scripts. I have trouble finishing things I write, which is a problem that, if AO3 is any indication, is probably the world's most common roadblock in writing.

Went to the satanic themed goth club on good friday, that was so fun. We had a blast. Place was PACKED. All goths have the same sense of humor.

I guess that's it for life stuff. I do feel kinda bad that I can't get myself to make fanart right now. I'm just having thoughts on the nature of art and of fanart and the impact of it on the world as a whole. And particularly thoughts on social media and the internet and what it even *is*. What is it for? We really need to work that out.

#personal #it's just a long post not a sad post. just little life updates

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necroticghost · 17 days ago

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just me venting...

an old friend reached out to me to hang out, and it made my day and couldn't wait to see him too. but I left him on delivered for 24h already because I keep thinking about how there's nothing interesting in my life that I could talk about.

he's gonna ask questions. I'm gonna have to lie. it's gonna be awkward. no I'm still not working. no I'm still not making money from my art. I've barely even been doing art. no I didn't get any more education. I completely gave up on myself. you're talking to a no one. why did you want to meet me in the first place? what is there to miss or want to see? I'm going to waste his time... and he's such a lovely person, he also called me sweetheart, and I don't know what to do... I don't want to make it awkward. I can't just say I've been too busy surviving everyday and that depression is draining me, even though I know he'd probably understand since he's a very open and kind person, it's just not an appropriate talk to have over coffee.

and I've been brainstorming since yesterday on what bluffs I could use to direct attention away from myself. and there's another lovely old friend that messaged me a while ago asking how I've been and he misses me, but again I ignored him for the same reason... I always do this to everyone and it's killing me because I'm dying to talk to them again, I miss them so much too, and I can't believe they actually remember me... but there's nothing I can bring to the conversation. I'm worthless and shouldn't even exist in the first place. I always distance myself from everyone and then get sad that I'm lonely, so pathetic... but I don't want them to see the mess that I am. the same happened with my brother. I distanced myself from him too because I want him to have a bright present and future, and it might slip in conversation that I'm not doing okay but telling him things isn't an option, what older sibling burdens their younger ones with their problems? I wouldn't be able to live with myself. so even though I'm constantly missing him, keeping my distance is for the better... it's so tiring to act cheerful and okay... so I decided to not talk at all.

whenever I talk, I always end up saying something I shouldn't. I'm worrying everyone who still stuck with me, and I'm tired myself of my apologies about "sorry that I didn't reply earlier". I can't stand it anymore either, but I simply can't talk to people, I'm not allowing myself, I don't deserve it. it's too nice for me, I'm supposed to be suffering.

#personal #vent #venting #depressing shit #mentally tired #tw depressing thoughts

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blckbarbiedoll · 2 months ago

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Ghost Of You (M.B)-Chapter 21

Nobody Gets Me (Like You)

2019-Chicago, Illinois

Angie sat in the office of The Beef, sorting through bills and other boring paperwork. The phone pulled her out of her trance as it began to ring.

"Hello?"

"Can I talk to Michael?"

"He's busy right now. Who's this?"

"Tell him Nico called."

"Okay, I will."

The line went silent and she placed the phone back.

"Hey, boss lady!"

"Yes, Tina?"

"We need more peppers."

"Hot or sweet?"

"Both."

"I'll get on it." She sighed. "Where's Michael?"

"He went out back."

"Of course he did."

"Are you two doing better?"

"I think so. Maybe. I don't know."

"I mean, it seems like you're doing better."

"We're trying."

"That's good."

"Mhm." She stood up and put her coat on. "I'm gonna go find him."

"Alright. Oh! I almost forgot! Happy birthday!"

"Thank you, T." Angie smiled and hugged the older woman. "I love you."

"Love you too, mama."

🤍

Michael and Richie were leaning against the brick wall in the cold alley, cigarettes hanging from their lips.

"Can I ask you something, man?" Mikey asked his friend, taking a long drag of his cigarette.

"Go for it."

"Did you know that you and Tiffany were gonna separate before you did?"

"Woah." He blew out a large puff of smoke.

"Sorry."

"Why're you asking? You think Angie's gonna leave you?"

"I don't know anymore."

"What's going on, man?"

"I'm an asshole, and she deserves better."

"I coulda told you that."

"I tell you that we don't even fuck anymore?"

"No. I did not know that."

"Did you know that chronic opioid use can affect your ability to perform? 'Cause I didn't." He scoffed. "And on top of that, I can't even get outta my own head long enough to do anything else with her. How fucking pathetic is that?"

"I...I don't even know what to say, man."

"Richie, everyday, I see how sad and tired she is. And I know it's 'cause of me. She used to smile, and laugh, and be happy. I fucking ruined that. She hates me, and I know it."

"Have you talked to your therapist about this?"

"That shit doesn't work. All her advice is the same."

"Maybe talk to your wife."

"All she's gonna say is that it doesn't bother her and she still loves me."

"You ever think that might be the truth?"

"Truth or not, she deserves better."

"So be better."

"I tried."

"No you didn't. Not hard enough. You say your wife deserves better, so you be better." He sternly told his friend. "You be better for your wife and for your daughter, 'cause they need you."

"Why would I take advice from you on how to keep my family?"

"Because I know how it feels to lose ‘em. And I know that you don't wanna feel that. I also know that if you hurt those girls more than you already have, I will fucking kill you."

The sound of a large metal door hitting the brick wall pulled them out of their conversation. Angie walked out into the alley and towards the duo.

"I was looking for you. What're you doing out here? It's fucking freezing."

"I just needed a minute." Mikey answered.

"Are you guys okay?"

"We're fine." Richie plainly said. "Happy birthday." He leaned down to kiss her cheek before stomping out his cigarette and walking back into the building.

"That was weird." She sighed.

"Yeah."

"Someone called for you."

"Who?"

"Nico."

"He called?"

"Yeah. Who is he?"

"Uh, nobody important." He cleared his throat. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah."

"Do you hate me?"

Angie had a puzzled look on her face and tilted her head to the side. "I can't believe you'd even ask me that."

"I'm sorry."

"Why would you ask that?"

"You'd be justified if you did."

"I probably would be. But I don't. I love you."

"I love you too."

She kissed him softly and hugged him. "You know what I want for my thirty-fourth birthday?" She cringed at the age.

"What?"

"I wanna go home and eat our Thanksgiving leftovers while we watch old romcoms."

"That's what you want?"

"That's what I want."

"We can do that."

"It's a date." She kissed his cheek. "Come on, we got a restaurant to run."

🤍

Michael sat on the couch with Sophia while Angie was heating up dinner. The little girl had crayons and paper laid all over the coffee table. She looked up at her father and handed him a colorful piece of paper.

"You made this?" He looked at it and grinned slightly.

"Mhm. It's a birthday present for Mommy. That's you, and that's me, and that's Mommy."

"Who's that?"

"My baby brother. Grandma said he's in heaven, so I put him in the sky."

"That's uh...that's really nice, sweetie." Michael quickly wiped his eyes and pulled Sophia into a hug. "I love you." He kissed the top of her head. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, Daddy."

"Soph, put all your stuff away in your room and wash your hands for dinner."

"Okay, Mommy!" The girl picked up all of her art supplies and headed into her room.

"Babe, can you set the table?" Angie called. He remained on the couch, looking at the picture Sophia had gifted him. "Michael!"

"Huh? Sorry."

"Can you set the table?"

"Yeah." He stood up and made his way over to her in the kitchen.

While Angie was ranting on about some story Sophia had told her, Michael felt as if his heart was going to burst. His hands were shaking as he placed the silverware onto the table. He slowly picked up a plate and accidentally dropped it onto the floor.

"Babe!"

"I'm sorry."

"Don't touch it." She went over to the closet to grab a broom and dustpan.

He knelt onto the floor and picked up the shattered pieces. "Fuck!" He groaned as the glass sliced through his palm.

"I told you not to touch it." She wet a rag and knelt down beside him. She reached for his hand, only for him to pull it away. "Lemme see."

He slowly gave her back his hand. She wiped away the blood and reached into one of the drawers for a bandaid. After placing it on the cut, she pressed a kiss over the covered scar.

"I'm sorry." He sniffled. "I didn't mean to."

"It's okay. It's just a plate. How's your hand?"

"I'm so sorry." He leaned against her and buried his face in her neck. "I'm sorry for everything."

She wrapped her arms around him and held him as he sobbed. "It's okay. Why're you crying, bear? It's okay."

"What happened?" Sophia asked as she walked over to her parents.

"Careful, baby." Angie told her. "There's broken glass."

Sophia stepped around the glass and knelt down to join her parent's embrace. Michael wrapped his arm around the little girl and held her tightly.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

#fanfic #the bear #mikey berzatto #black oc #mikey berzatto x oc

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bittersqxtch · 1 year ago

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Songs and Ships

thank you @athenswrites for the tag! i shall add @imslowlydisintegrating and @taeonysus8 (i really need more writer moots sob sob)

the rules of this tag game: write 2-5 songs that represent a ship between your characters (can be romantic or platonic or a secret third thing). then add a quote from your WIP beneath each song (if possible!).

i've decided that i'm gonna focus on Jae and Jun from TGCT for this since i'm currently working on that fic and this might help me get the vibes right for once (literally on my third rewrite already, someone send help ;^;)

HER - Chase Atlantic

"ꜱʜᴇ ꜱᴀʏꜱ 'ᴏᴏʜ, ᴡᴇ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴅᴏ ᴡʜᴀᴛᴇᴠᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛ, ʙᴜᴛ ʙᴏʏ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ɢᴏ ꜰᴀʟʟɪɴɢ ɪɴ ʟᴏᴠᴇ…ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ ꜱᴛᴀʏ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍᴇ, ᴀʟʟ ʏᴏᴜ'ʟʟ ᴇᴠᴇʀ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ɪꜱ ᴏɴᴇ ᴅᴀʏ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍᴇ'."

this song reminds me of them because, in a moment of vulnerability, Jae makes Jun promise that he will keep hating her until the end of time. her greatest secret is that she is terminally ill (suffering from a heart illness) and that's why she lives every day like it's her last - considering how she refuses bad medication most days, she could drop dead at any moment. anyway, she has no problem hanging out with Jun and getting into messy situations with him because she believes that he will keep hating her indefinitely. unlike her friends, he won't mourn her when she dies - or at least that's what she believes. even when things get a little heated and feelings start brewing, Jae pushes the longing aside and intends to cut him off when the time comes. having a relationship with him would only subject Jun to a great deal of heartache and Jae would much rather he stay as her enemy than have him become something more only to end up wasting his life on mourning her once she passes away.

"Please hate me," Jae whispered, pulling him out of his thoughts. When he turned to look at her, he was caught off by the silent plea shining in her eyes. "Why?" Jun frowned, confused by her request. "Why do you want me to hate you?" "Because you hated me before," Jae responded quietly. "It should be easy for you to keep hating me even if we start hanging out and acting civil with one another like this." A sad smile tugged at the corners of her lips as she added, "Besides, you never liked me in the first place, did you? So don't change that now. Don't stop hating me."

"ɪꜰ ɪ'ᴍ ꜱᴜᴄʜ ᴀ ɴɪᴄᴇ ɢᴜʏ ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ɢʀᴇᴀᴛ ᴛɪᴍᴇ, ᴡʜʏ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴡᴇ ᴋɪᴄᴋ ɪᴛ ᴜᴘ ᴀ ɴᴏᴛᴄʜ? ʜᴏᴡ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴠᴇʀ, ᴍᴏᴠᴇ ɪɴ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ ᴄʟᴏꜱᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ʟᴇᴛ ᴍʏ ʜᴀɴᴅꜱ ɢɪᴠᴇ ɪᴛ ᴀ ꜱʜᴏᴛ"

Just Friends - JORDY

Jun is the first to breach the thin line between love and hate. being reluctant acquaintances with Jae seems impossible until he finds himself thinking constantly about her, wondering if she got home safely from school, becoming irritated when she's too close to other guys, and so on. he denies it time and time again, half because he cannot imagine that he could've caught feelings for his enemy and half because he subconsciously knows that nothing good will come out of him developing feelings for her. still, a part of him can't help but yearn to cross over that line. unfortunately, Jae is intent on staying enemies. no one said anything about that coming with a few benefits though...

Uh oh, he thought, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed. This won't end well. "Hey," he uttered quietly, knowing that he should probably step away from her but not being able to move from the spot. Jae quirked her eyebrow at him. Equally quietly, she replied, "Hi...?" "About my wish..." "What about it?" Jun's eyes flickered down to her lips briefly. Influenced by a sudden burst of bravery, he blurted out, "I know what I want." "Oh yeah?" Jae tilted her head to the side curiously, a small smile playing on her lips. She found his awkwardness adorable, but she wasn't about to tell him that. Instead, voice quiet, she prompted, "What is it?" "...Kiss me."

"ᴛʀᴀᴘᴘᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴀ ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ, ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ ʙʀᴇᴀᴋ ꜰʀᴇᴇ, ɪᴛ'ꜱ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟɪᴛʏ ɪꜱ ᴍᴏᴄᴋɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ. ɪ'ᴍ ꜱᴄʀᴇᴀᴍɪɴɢ ᴀɴᴅ ꜱʜᴏᴜᴛɪɴɢ ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ'ꜱ ɴᴏ ꜱᴏᴜɴᴅ. ɪ'ᴍ ʟᴏꜱᴛ, ɪ'ᴍ ꜱᴛᴜᴄᴋ, ɪ ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ ʙᴇ ꜰᴏᴜɴᴅ"

Trapped In A Dream - RudyWade

when they figure out that they are living in the world of a manhwa and that all that they have been through was scripted by The Writer for the plot, Jae and Jun begin to question everything - their past, their hardships, their relationship, and where The Writer intends to take the story next. amidst the chaos, they start to remember bits and pieces of their previous lives and both start wondering whether their feelings for one another are real or if, perhaps, they are nothing more than a set-up forced upon them by their god.

(i have yet to write this section so no WIP writing for this i'm afraid)

#writerblr #tag game #oc #character development #the gift called “today”#bittersqxtch #kwon jae #jae and jun #i was going for enemies-to-lovers but it turned out to be idiots-to-lovers instead #are they even lovers at the end of the fic?#who knows #wip #tgct

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